#the issue is whether they can pull together and find peace for each other rather than trying to take it for themselves

[kaesaaurelia]

Some Hero Forge designs for my 3rd Life space colonists AU!

Martyn is the ship's doctor -- a generalist with a lot of emergency experience in situations that you don't get much on populated planets. He's coolheaded in a crisis and good at putting people at their ease even if he's got to use sharp things on them. As long as they like hearing stupid jokes while they're bleeding out, anyway.

Grian is the ship's doctor in that this is one of those science fiction universes where FTL travel is achieved via a pilot controlling the ship through direct neural interface, so the line between the pilot and the ship can get very blurry. It's Grian's job to fix issues that might arise with the interface and with the pilot's neurology, and to protect the pilot's life at all costs.

Scar's the pilot. He's very, very good, but to be successful at this kind of thing you have to be able to put up with your brain giving you sensations that say THIS IS GOING TO HURT THE WHOLE TIME YOU'RE DYING and just lean into them, or you might miss your mark and come out of hyperspace in the middle of a sun. He can be pretty accident-prone planetside, because at this point he's used to ignoring his instinctive sense of self-preservation, and to moving absurdly fast in a low- to no-gravity environment.

Ren's a weird one, because for most of the 3rd Life ensemble I could figure out some kind of specific job they'd be doing as space colonists either aboard ship or when they finally got to the alien planet, but "starts a small business in magic, crowns himself king, and then asks to be ritually slaughtered for the sake of protecting his kingdom" is a real stumper when it comes to career counseling. So I decided to go with what would be the funniest rather than what made the most sense, which is that he's Martyn's house-husband and a relatively popular fantasy author who can't figure out how to finish the last book of his doorstopper fantasy trilogy. Martyn WAS considering dropping all space travel longer than a week or so in order to spend more time at home, but Ren was like "I don't think I can finish this book help" and now he and Martyn are moving to another solar system indefinitely. Who among us has not started something they could not finish and wished to just quietly vacate the planet over it?

(Don't let the cozy domesticity fool you, I will still be putting them through The Horrors™️; these fools are still doomed by the narrative. Space wants nothing more or less than to kill you and reduce your remains to a fine particulate.)

[queenshelby]

A New Life

Part Ten: The Hunt

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Words: 3,154

Warning: Smut

After about twenty minutes and you finally managed to get dressed, the doorbell rang and Cillian’s sister arrived to look after the children.

Cillian’s sister was in her early thirties and currently pregnant with her second child. She had kindly offered to look after Max and Cian’s children and, after you had met her already a few weeks ago, you thought that this was a good idea since Max wouldn’t be able to walk the whole 12 km you had planned.

Max was excited to see her and Cillian’s young nephew who, recently, had turned four was going to spend the day with him and the other children.

‘Good to see you again Y/N’ she said, greeting you with a hug and you recalled the last time you had met her at Cillian’s house when him and Cian were making dinner. It was obvious to you that she liked you and, even more so, it was obvious to her that you liked her brother and that this feeling was mutual.

‘Good to see you. How was the drive?’ you asked, knowing that she was travelling from Cork, which is where she lived.

‘Pretty good actually. I went to see mum and dad last night for dinner and stayed there’ she pointed out, looking at Cillian as she did. It was obvious to you that she was teasing him, but you didn’t know what about.

‘I got the message, thanks’ Cillian chuckled and, just as he did, his sister pulled him aside.

***

‘You know what I am about to say’ she said to Cillian in private so that no one else could hear them.

She had been trying to get Cillian to ask you out for two weeks now, but he outright refused.

‘And I told you that I am not interested in dating. Despite, she’s twenty years younger than me’ Cillian pointed out again after having made the age gap between you and him quite an issue.

Of course, his sister didn’t know that you were, in fact, sleeping with each other but, this didn’t change the fact that neither of you were wanting to be romantically involved with anyone right now.

What his sister did, however, know was how you both looked at each and how much Cillian enjoyed your and Max’s company. Unbeknownst to you, she had flagged with Cillian several times before and simply wanted him to be happy.

‘Think about it Cillian, she’s young which means that she probably still wants children. Despite, you wouldn’t be the first actor who dates a younger woman. Apparently, it is quite common’ his sister said, grinning cheekily.

‘You need to stop it’ Cillian chuckled. ‘Did Ma put you up to this?’ he then asked somewhat amused after she begged him during his last visit to Cork to find someone, settle down and give her some more grandchildren.

‘Maybe’ his sister grinned in response before carrying on. ‘She said that, perhaps, you just need a little a bit of help’ she then said, causing Cillian to chuckle again before sighing in disbelieve.

‘Ma thinks I need a little bit of help with finding a woman, eh?’ he asked somewhat amused and his sister nodded with a wide smile.

‘Yes, and I have something in mind to help you along’ she went on to say before dragging Cillian back into the kitchen.

Cillian’s sister was into boardgames and a little nerdy, just like her brother. She had recently started a business and was organising parties and fun activities for children and adults. This, amongst other things, included murder mystery parties and escape rooms and she he had a little surprise prepared for your hike as well with the help from your brother Cian who was about to bail on the adventure.

***

‘Listen up folks! I am trialling out a new little business idea and you will be my test objects. I am sending you all on a scavenger hunt’ she announced with excitement, causing Cillian to cock an eyebrow.

‘Seriously?’ he asked, unimpressed. He was tired enough as it was and didn’t want to spend the entire day looking for cues.

‘I suppose we better form teams then’ Laura said, looking over towards Cillian who was still preoccupied with his second cup of coffee and didn’t notice.

‘I have already set up three teams and each team will get an envelope with separate sets of instructions. At the end, you will all meet at the same place but you will get there via different ways. The first team to arrive will win’ she explained before handing out the envelopes.

‘Well Y/N, it looks like you are stuck with me for the day’ Cillian said as his sister handed him a green coloured envelope with both of your names on it and you couldn’t help but get a little excited about it all.

You would be spending the next five or six hours with Cillian and you were rather happy about that.

Laura, on the other hand, was disappointed that she was paired up with Evelyn while the other couple at the house was paired up with each other.

***

After addressing a few housekeeping matters and putting on your hiking shoes, each team made their way to the nearby reserve which is where you all had to split up.

Cillian and you were headed south and, after a twenty-minute journey, you questioned Cillian’s navigation skills.

‘Are you sure this is the right way?’ you asked, curious as to whether Cillian knew where he was going.

‘Yes, I am sure. Trust me, alright?’ he confirmed and you nodded and agreed to simply follow his lead. You were way too tired to argue with him and, ten minutes later, were glad that you didn’t as, sure enough, you arrived at the trail referenced inside the envelope you were given.

As you arrived at the trail, the crisp air was blissfully quiet and the area almost seemed deserted. You were surprised that it didn’t attract more tourists but Cillian told you that it was simply too early in the day.

The peace and quiet could almost be felt even as the cool morning breeze wafted through the trees and gently stirred the still morning air.

‘I am fairly sure I know where the first cue is’ Cillian then said as you began walking down the trail still rugged up in long pants and jackets and, when you were sure that really no one was around, you took hold of his hand.

You weren’t sure whether you should have done that or whether it was inappropriate since you weren’t dating, but Cillian quickly confirmed with a kiss that it was alright.

‘I actually like the fact that it is just us for the day walking through these woods’ Cillian then chuckled after your lips drifted apart and he didn’t really appear pressed for time.

‘And why is that?’ you asked cheekily and with a big grin on your face.

‘So, I can keep doing this’ he responded before kissing you again, this time more passionately.

By this point, you were less than an hour into your journey and already lost some time simply by stopping and kissing each other but a kiss wasn’t all you wanted.

‘Is kissing all you want to do while we have this time alone together in the woods?’ you asked while suggestively biting your lip and Cillian couldn’t help but laugh.

‘I suppose I am not very competitive and don’t care if we win or lose so, if we find a quiet and secluded area then, by all means, we can do whatever you want’ Cillian said with a wink and you eagerly nodded before pulling him close again.

‘Hmm how cheeky Mr Murphy’ you giggled and, sure enough, about twenty minutes later, you arrived at a rather secluded area which is also where the next cue was hidden.  

You bent down to pick up the cue and you could immediately feel Cillian’s eyes on your ass when you did.

By this point, you had removed your jacked and stuffed it into your backpack which caused more of your beautiful skin to be exposed.

‘Are you staring at my ass?’ you asked cheekily before reminding Cillian that he was meant to read the next part of the instructions inside of the envelope.

‘Of course not’ he chuckled in response as he was still trying to catch his breath after having walked uphill for quite some time.

‘Out of breath, are we old man?’ you then teased but Cillian wasn’t amused.

‘Call me that again and you are in trouble’ he said before telling you that he was a little out of shape after having missed last weeks’ PT sessions and, just as he did, you pulled him close for a passionate and long kiss.

With a mischievous look, you leaned into him, took the envelope out of his hand and ran your hand over Cillian’s crotch.

‘It looks like this guy isn't out of shape. To the contrary, he seems to be perfectly healthy’ you smirked before pushing Cillian against the large tree in front of which he was standing.

‘He is very eager and active, that’s for sure’ Cillian laughed just before you began to unbutton and unzip his pants in order to free his hard member.

‘Jesus Y/N’ he then groaned as you began to stroke him gently while keeping an eye out to ensure that no one was watching you.

But your sense for your surroundings soon vanished when Cillian pulled you even closer for yet another passionate kiss.

As the kissing furiously escalated you became soaking wet and needed to feel Cillian’s cock inside you. Breaking contact, you quickly turned around and suggestively leaned forward against one of the large rock formations.

There were no words needed and Cillian quickly grabbed hold of your tights and pushed them down your legs along with your panties.

‘So fucking wet again’ Cillian observed with a husky voice as his fingers brushed against your wet folds, collecting some of your juices and spreading them before he lined himself up with your entrance from behind.

‘Well, I am always aching for you, you should know that by now’ you said, wiggling your ass to encourage him to slide inside you.

Then, all of a sudden, you let out a loud cry as, with one swift thrust, Cillian’s cock smoothly penetrated you and entered your waiting pussy.

‘Shh’ Cillian reminded you as each slow and agonising thrust elicited protests from you to speed up but he ignored them with a smirk and proceeded at a painfully slow pace, making sure your body and pussy felt each deep impact.

Coated by your slick juices, drops of your sweet nectar began to drip from Cillian’s cock with every thrust and you could hear him groan behind you, watching his cock impale on your pussy.

‘You are so fucking sexy in those hiking clothes’ Cillian observed and, hearing your soft but growing moans in response, caused him to increase the force and speed of his thrusts.

‘Oh god Cillian, fuck’ you moaned and, eventually, he leaned forward and gave your ears a playful nibble before taking your hands into his so that your entire body weight was balanced solely by his hands and cock.

As he began to speed up and thrusted into you earnestly with the full length of his cock your assets began shuddering from the forceful pounding.

You loved hearing Cillian’s soft growls and he loved hearing your heated moans as you were fucking like animals in heat and your rough but yet passionate love making had been quickly building up to a climax.

‘Oh god Cillian, cum inside me. I want to feel it, all of it’ you moaned as you became louder and more desperate.

‘Not yet’ Cillian said determined as your lustful moans echoed throughout the forest and no doubt spooked some animals. Instead of continuing his assault on your pussy, he pulled his dripping and erect cock out of your warm wetness, leaving you once again to pout and beg in desperation.

‘Please no…Cillian…fuck…’ you huffed out as you turned around to look at him in confusion.

Your plead for more was met with a grin and then a kiss which was passionate but not as heated as the last.

‘Common, let’s keep going and find another cue first’ he said, pulling up his pants and covering his erection as best as he could after your lips drifted apart.

‘Cillian, I am fucking soaking. I need to cum’ you said, disapproving of his teasing, but he enjoyed it way too much. It was his game.

***

An hour and two cues later, you found yet another perfect love making spot deep inside the forest.

‘This perfect, there is no one around and the area is covered with bushes’ you observed just before your lips met with his, demanding him to take you and make you cum without saying anything else.

Cillian nodded and, without words, you both somehow stumbled over to a flat rock not too far from the marker indicating the direction of the trail.

Covered by dense vegetation, this large, smooth rock seemed perfectly suited as a bench for groups of people. For the two of you, though, it was just the perfect place for other activities...

As you sat down on the rock Cillian bent down and proceeded to give you what you deserved.

‘These will need to come off’ Cillian said, kneeling before you and tugging on your tights.

You quickly undid your hiking shoes and then pushed them off before allowing Cillian to remove yourtights and panties.

‘Let’s hope no one comes down this way, eh?’ he then smirked but you no longer cared and pulled him close, desperate to feel him inside of you once again.

Spreading your legs apart, he leaned above you and took you in fully with his eyes. Your smiling and blushing face, cheeks and pussy reddened with arousal turned Cillian on immensely. Your hard nipples poking through your exercise top, heaving with each breath were a sight he knew he would remember forever. And your shy but warm hands, gripped Cillian’s hand with great trust as your shining eyes encouraged him to take you right then and there.

Cillian unbuttoned and unzipped his pants again, pushing them down together with his briefs before aligning himself with your entrance.

Without hesitation, he took a deep breath and plunged straight into your tight wetness as a whimper escaped your quivering lips. Cillian was pushing in firmly and pulling out in an agonisingly slow manner. This only increased the pleasure and soon your bodies were moving in tandem like a well-oiled fucking machine as grunts and moans filled the air.

Cillian was joyfully fucking you as his cock pounded against your pussy and relentlessly assaulted it as your dueling tongues enticed each other to hotter and deeper kisses.

His thrusts soon fastened but, just as you were about to approach a hastening climax, he slowed down again. Although fucking you senseless was what his body yearned to do as he saw your heaving body under him shining with sweat, his reserves of self-control still held.

Pushing in deeply so that you could feel his warm cock filling you up, he remained in you for a short while before pulling out completely.

As you gazed at him with pleading eyes, he smirked, then leaned in to kiss you before slamming his cock unexpectedly into your waiting pussy starving for more.

Again and again, he followed this process of pushing deep into you, holding it there so you could feel such fullness, before pulling out completely and leaving you yearning crazily for the next thrust.

Taking you to new heights of pleasure with each deep impact, he began to speed up unconsciously as your moans and hot pussy walls rapidly eroded his self-control.

All too soon, he felt the climax approaching inevitably. Even as your bodies were lost in pleasure, however, your ears picked up the murmur of early hikers at the summit not too far from where you were. And yet, Cillian’s cock began to pound you harder and faster with increasing urgency and desperation.

‘Don’t you dare fucking stop now’ you moaned quietly and Cillian certainly couldn’t stop even if he wanted to. Placing both hands on your shoulders, he forcefully pushed down as his hips returned from their swing and thrusted firmly upwards into you. Impaled on his thick and painfully erect shaft, your pussy lips widened, as did your eyes.

‘Oh god yes’ you moaned as your climax was approaching fast and hard and you began to quiver.

With a groan, Cillian reached his high at the same time as you. His cock was exploding deep inside you, filling your waiting pussy with sticky ropes of hot cum. Even as your pussy walls convulsed with pleasure, they were quickly painted white with his swirling cum while trying their best to milk him dry of every drop.

Wrapped in a deep kiss to muffle your moans of pleasure, you could hear the nearby crowd approaching and, at the sound of the cracking of some sticks, Cillian quickly pulled out of you and helped you up from where you were lying.

Seeing your sore and well-used pussy dripping your juices and his thick cum made Cillian inhale sharply before he pulled up his pants.

You were quick to get dressed yourself before anyone would see you and, sure enough, minutes later, the small group pf hikers found your little hiding spot and greeted you.

***

After another few hours following your small detour deeper into the woods in order to get some intimacy, you finally found the last cue which led you to a small local pub.

You weren’t surprised when you learned that you were, indeed, the last team to arrive at your destination.

‘Did you guys get lost or something?’ Cian asked when you both finally sat down at the table and ordered two pints of Guinness.

‘We just took our time. Those cues were tricky’ Cillian chuckled which is when Evelyn informed you that you arrived an entire hour after she did.

‘I had to stop and take some sightseeing photos as well’ you then told her, cheeks blushing red while you were already thinking about how you would be sneaking into Cillian’s bedroom that night.

   Tag List:

@lilymurphy03@deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-your-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15  @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r  @tellingyouastory  @captivatedbycillianmurphy​  @namelesslosers​  @littlewhiterose​  @ttzamara​  @ttzamara @cilleveryone  ​

@peaky-cillian​

@severewobblerlightdragon​  @ysmmsy​  

[siimjaeyun]

VOLUME TWO: ICE ICE BABY

synopsis: all you've ever wanted was to be good enough for jake sim, the captain of the soccer team, and the boy any girl would kill to be with. the issue? you know he's only with you to get back at his ex and have an eye candy around his arm. but when his friend sunghoon is back at school, maybe he'll teach you that you're more than just a pretty trophy.

masterlist

You manage to release another sigh as you make your way inside your home.

Jake had bailed on you for the third time this week, doing so at least two to four times for the past three months and you were tired of it. Half of the time it was because of practice and the others were due to excuses you're pretty sure he pulled out of his ass.

You wanted to text the group chat but figured you didn't want to add to the hatred your three best friends already had towards said male boy.

You didn't have any work to do, so for a change in sceneries you head to the local ice rink, the only possible place you think of as your second home.

Once entering, the scent of ice and water touch on the memories of your last summer. Yet you don't pay attention to the bittersweet feelings when the ice rink owner approaches you.

"Y/n! How have you been, it's been quite a while since I last saw you." She takes a good luck at you, admiring your smile in particular.

"I've been well, just busy with school and some other stuff."

"Well you know you're always welcome here and if you ever want your job back just say the word? You should head inside, there's only one other student in there." You nod your head and bid farewell while picking up a pair of ice skates and heading inside.

Too engrossed in the feeling of the ice under you as you open the gate to skate, you don't catch the boy staring at you.

"My, my do we meet again?" You glance up and find none other than Sunghoon with a smirk on his face.

"Hello to you too Sunghoon." You contemplate whether it be best to run off and come back later, but it's not like you could handle another disappointment.

"Jake never told me his girlfriend skates." You skate past him and keep going before choosing to answer.

"Yeah well I doubt he's talked about me at all. But if you don't mind I'd like to be alone." You try to get past him again but he blocks your view.

"I'm just trying to talk to you? I wanna get to know Jake's pink princess better." His ending comment was your last straw and you shove him, making him lose balance while you exit the rink. You miss his yells to come back and instead go into one of the waiting areas, throwing off your ice skates in frustration.

"Hey hey, I didn't mean to say anything bad "

"Fuck off Park Sunghoon." You say sternly, picking up your skates and trying your best not to cry in front of him.

"Hey, y/n look at me. I'm sorry." Sunghoon abruptly takes a hold of your shoulders and gets you to look at him in the eyes, noticing the guilt painted on his face.

"I know you didn't mean anything, I'm just tired and I hate hearing that name."

"Pink princess?" He questions.

"Exactly. I just want to be here in peace and do me another favor, please don't tell anyone you saw me here. No one can know okay?" Confused, he agrees but still can't help but feel bad for the tension from earlier.

"But on one condition." Sunghoon leaves the room and you choose to follow him up a flight stairs, considering that there's a possibility he could murder you then and there.

"That condition is for you to keep this a secret." He holds a key out and opens the door which leads to the area right above the skating rink for you to see on both sides.

"I thought the keys to this place were lost." You ask, amazed by the way all the skaters appear from your sight of view.

"They were, I figured if I knew a secret than you should too." He goes to the cabinet, and pulls out a sheet and some pillows for the both of you to sit.

"So, if we're on a secret basis, then tell me about yourself." You were surprised by his question to say the least, since most people could care less about any of your actual thoughts.

"Well what do you want to know? Aside from my utter hatred for the nickname?"

"Why don't you want to tell people you know how to skate? As an ice skater it's kind of offensive." He fakes being a pain letting you release a small laugh.

"I just think of this as my safe place. When all eyes are on you, there's not much you can do that isn't for yourself like ice skating and song writing."

"You write songs?" A small blush forms on your cheeks as you realize the accidental mention.

"Yeah, but they're not good. It's just my little world I guess, what about you?"

You turn the conversation towards him and find yourself rather entertained. There's a few serious moments, and others where Sunghoon is close to beating you up for teasing him showing a bit of his fangs in the process.

"Okay okay final question, why do you hate the color pink so much? And why do you let Jake talk you into it." You sigh looking at him with your pinky out.

"Pinky promise this stays between us? The only other people that know are my friends Giselle, Sunoo and Jungwon okay?" He agrees, and let's you continue.

"Well, when I was younger and my biological parents were still together, I caught my dad cheating on my mom with another woman in their bedroom. Later, my dad divorced my mom, got remarried and abandoned us to make a new family...the color the woman always wore was pink. Her lingerie was pink that day I caught them, when they got divorced I met her in the lobby in a pink dress and their wedding dress was also pink. Pink is to me a color of false promises, it's a symbol that love doesn't exist," you say honestly before answering his second question, "I wear pink because Jake said it's my best color or it's what he repeated often. I'm so pressured to be good enough that I make myself wear pink thinking it'll prove something. And that is pretty much everything there is to know."

"Thank you for trusting me y/n. And rest assured that everything is safe with me." He holds your hand and you became startled when his phone rings.

"My mom is calling me to come home. It's almost ten o clock." Your eyes widen as you confirm the hour, exiting the room instantly with Sunghoon.

"Hey sunghoon, thanks for listening." Sunghoon just smiles and hands you a sticky note.

"My number. I'm here anytime. We might only know each other for a day, but I can tell there's a lot more to you than meets the eye." He walks away and you head home, inputting his number almost instantly.

Maybe Park Sunghoon wasn't that bad.

------

taglist: @abdiitcryy @nyfwyeonjun @pinkhyunie @hobistigma

[imkylotrash]

Meet Me In The Hallway (3)

Pairing: Sky x reader

Summary: Stella is losing patience and when you follow Sky into the forest to find the Burned One, she lets part of your secret slip as a warning. 

Tagging: @grey-girl @intoanothermind @bitchwhytho @music-of-melody

Series Masterlist

“I thought I saw you leave Sky’s room and then I thought… That can’t be true. Y/N wouldn’t be stupid enough to do that when they know what I know.”

You really hate Stella. Slowly, you turn around to face her preparing yourself for the venomous smile she no doubt has plastered on her face. Barely anytime has gone by but you’re already getting very tired of having her threaten you.

“Silva is hurt. He needed someone to comfort him. That’s all.” You’re dog-tired wishing for a peaceful sleep but Stella has other plans.

“If Sky needs comforting, I will make sure he gets it. Not you.” It baffles you how she claims to care for him when all she does it look after her own needs. Frankly, you don’t care who gets to comfort him as long as he’s not alone. You’d give up just about anything to make sure he’s happy but Stella seems to think it’s him who should give up everything for her. 

“Are you really that selfish you’ll put your own happiness above his?” you dare ask tired of her games. 

“I’m going to give you one last chance to fix this,” she starts completely ignoring your question. 

“I have to stay away from him. I get it,” you interrupt her about to turn around and walk away when she stops you. 

“I want you to convince him to go on a date with me. He’s been too occupied sulking over you to show any interest in me. I want you to make him realise that I’m the obvious choice.” She must’ve lost her mind. For a whole minute you simply just stare at her taking her words in. She wants you to convince Sky to fall in love with her. In the middle of everything going on with Silva. Is she completely mental? 

“Did you hear me or do I need to repeat myself?” In an attempt to act unbothered, she checks her nails but you see right through her. All the insecurities and abandonment issues shine bright in the dark and you briefly pity her. Everyone has heard the rumours of her mother and the way she’s been treated, but you came from a horrible life too and you didn’t turn into a bitch. 

“I heard you.” 

“Great. You can tell him I’ll be waiting in my room.” She walks past you not even bothering to ask how Silva is doing. Despite your need for some proper sleep, you decide to head down to the greenhouse. Mr. Harvey is adding a fresh coat of the herb mix to Silva’s wounds. 

“Sky is sleeping,” you quickly say to easy Silva’s mind. He sits back down revealing the pain he’s in. 

“Can I help with anything?” you ask needing something to occupy your mind from what Stella asked of you. How can you focus on that when Silva could be dying? 

“Maybe you could cool me down again? It really helped me rest.” You oblige placing your hand on his forehead and channeling just the slightest magic into the palm of your hand. It’s an instant effect when the ice hits him. Slowly his skin returns to a normal shade rather than the hot red it was mere minutes ago. 

“Thank you,” he whispers lying down on the table again. It must be really bad if he’s so willing to show weakness. In the time you’ve known Silva, he’s never shown weakness about anything. You know it would be a different story if Sky were here though. He’d never want Sky to know just how much pain he’s in and you can’t blame him. It would crush Sky. 

“No problem. I can come back in a few hours to do it again?” You look to Mr. Harvey for signs whether that’s a good idea or not. He gives you a quick nod before continuing his work. You mean to head to your room but you spot a blonde boy who’s sneaking out the backdoor. 

“Are you kidding me?” With a sigh, you follow him outside realising that he’s heading straight for the forest. 

“Sky, where are you going?” you ask and the sound of your voice stops him dead in his tracks. 

“I’m going to find the Burned One that got Saul. I can’t just sit around and do nothing.” He’s not looking at you. Probably because he knows you’ll try to talk him out of it. 

“Please stay. Marco is out looking as we speak and I’m sure he’ll find it.” You’re desperate to keep him protected within the barrier but you’re always painfully aware of the fact that Sky is one of the most stubborn people you’ve ever met. You’re not sure you’ll be able to convince him especially now that you’re broken up. 

“I’m not waiting for someone else to save him. Saul is all I have left.” It’s a brutal reminder of what you took from him when you ended things and it tugs at your heartstrings just how badly you hurt him. 

“Then I’m coming with you.” If he’s going out there, you need to be there too. You’d never forgive yourself if something happened to him and you had the chance to stop it. 

“You’re not going with me,” he says as if he has any say at all. 

“If you’re going, I’m going. Package deal, remember?” It’s something you started saying after Riven kept commenting on the fact that you never went anywhere without each other and up until recently you never have. He doesn’t look pleased but he also doesn’t say no. He just hands you a small dagger for you to hold onto to. You grab hold of the water drops lying on the grass and freeze them before levitating them in the air. 

“I think I’m good.” He takes the dagger back without a word and proceeds to the forest. It’s a long trek but you don’t complain. You asked to be here and as much as you hate the uncomfortable silence that’s formed between the two of you, you’re glad you’re here. There’s no point in the search because it’s impossible to figure out what direction the Burned One headed but all you can do is keep a lookout and hope you get lucky. 

“Stop,” you whisper grabbing hold of his sleeve. He stops moving but you feel the shiver in his arm where your fingers grazed his skin. 

“Sorry,” you mumble letting go of him. A little further ahead, you see something move. Sky pulls out his sword and you channel your feelings ready to freeze it in place. It’s not the first time you and Sky has worked together, but it is the first time it’s been outside of training. 

“I freeze, you stab.” He nods hardly moving a muscle. You direct your power at the Burned One freezing every part of it to keep it from moving. You hold it in place feeling the fire inside of it trying to beat your ice but as you see Sky run towards it, you feel more motivated than ever to win. He stabs it right through its core and when you feel its resistance die out, you let go of control. It falls to the ground officially dead. 

“We did it,” you say out of breath. How you haven’t passed out from sleep deprivation yet is beyond you but it’s catching up to you now. 

“I’ll call Silva,” you say ignoring the need to fall asleep right here on the ground. It takes two rings before he picks up shouting about how irresponsible you are for taking off and hunting Burned Ones yourself. He doesn’t say thank you, but you know it’s hidden between the lines. 

“He’s definitely feeling better,” you say once he’s done giving both of you an earful. He demands you both return to school at once and now that you’ve killed the right one, you can oblige easily. 

“Thank you for coming with me,” Sky says on your way back.

“Of course. I know what Silva means to you.” This time the silence is comfortable almost as if nothing went wrong between the two of you. But Stella’s ultimatum is still weighing heavy on your mind. 

“Can I ask you to do something without any questions?” you ask him right before you reach the barrier. 

“What is it?” he asks but you need him to promise you before you tell him. You know he’ll never agree to it otherwise. 

“Promise me,” you say pausing just before the barrier. From here you can see the school and the students training out on the grass as if it’s just a normal day. But to them it probably is.

“I promise.” 

“I need you to take Stella on a date.” His glare might just pierce you from pure anger. 

“No questions. You promised!” He’s about to protest but stops himself. He’s a man of his word even if he hates it right now.

“Fine.” He starts walking leaving you behind. The second people spot you, they stare at you like you just arrived with the circus. 

“Is that them?”

“Do you think it’s true?” 

“Are we in danger?” Everyone is whispering and pointing fingers making you feel incredibly uncomfortable. You notice Musa not too far away and head over to her. 

“What’s going on?” Before she has a chance to tell you, a first year taps you on the shoulder. A bunch of girls are watching from afar making it obvious that the first year in front of you is here on a dare. 

“Is it true?” she asks continuously looking back at her friends. 

“Is what true?” you ask confused ignoring the sneaking suspicion you feel. 

“Is it true that you’re a changeling?” 

[mooniefics]

— the hands that beckon me

pairing : zeke jaeger / reader

word count : 1.9k

tags : emotional hurt / comfort, relationship discussion, pillow talk, insecure zeke :(

summary : zeke is finally home, on a brief layover from the war, and you both finally get around to having that tough discussion you've been putting off for far too long.

— originally posted 1 / 21 / 21 on ao3 —

"what do you do while i'm gone?"

your skin was still hot from being pressed over his when he asked, thrumming with a warmth you hadn't felt yet craved so deeply for months. you turned to face him from your place on your back in bed, pressing into his side, peering curiously at his profile. you'd missed seeing him like this, out of his ironed, pristine uniform, hair messy from your fingers running through it, sharp features warmed with the flush of passion, unobscured by his glasses, eyes and voice sleepy and relaxed rather than alert and tight with self-awareness.

"what do you mean?" your reply was soft, almost playful to counter his matter-of-fact delivery, reaching out to draw your fingers across his firm, bare chest.

"i mean what keeps you busy? what do you do for fun?"

>readmore<

the war with the mid-east allied forces had been dragging on for just about two years now, and there seemed to be no end in sight, but after the marleyan army managed to snatch a victory from the jaws of defeat on foreign soil, the news came to your internment zone that the soldiers would be returning on a brief layover as the countries' political leaders decided whether or not they'd be willing to smooth things over in a more peaceful manner.

this afternoon you had been there at the gates with his grandparents, barely able to stand still beside them as all three of you waited wordlessly with baited breath, balancing up on your tiptoes, straining to peek over the crowd to catch a glimpse of him. while others were stood by with looks of unmasked dread—men with clenched jaws and stiff shoulders, women with tears brimming their eyes, children tugging at sleeves and already crying with impatience—you felt an uncontainable joy. it was humbling to look around at all the panicked faces, to remember that not every family had the luxury of your confidence, the almost guaranteed certainty that the one you loved would return. but you couldn't help the blinding smile that broke out across your face as he ambled through the crowd, tired, well-kept, but looking warmly down at you and his family.

you had let him to greet them first, they were his blood relatives after all, but only after he'd finished giving his grandmother a tight hug and exchanging affectionate words did you allow yourself to throw your arms around him, burying your face into his shoulder and breathing in his rich scent of gunpowder, pine, just a faint hint of cigarettes, melting easily into his strong embrace. you and zeke had wandered back alongside the older couple to their home, sharing a calm, easy dinner where zeke relayed what information he could to them about the status of the ongoing battle, but you were just itching to have some time to yourself with him.

you'd spent hours cleaning your quaint little home a few streets down, agonizing over every little detail despite how you knew he didn't mind whatever state it was in, just that you were there. and as soon as you'd both said your friendly goodbyes and made it through the door of your home, he was pulling you along to the bedroom, legs having memorized the path of weaving through the living room and kitchen and down the hall to the door on the left.

he was impatient, as he always was when he was tugging you out of your clothes, but sensual all in the same when he pressed his lips onto yours, murmured soft, longing words in your ear, hands squeezing and grabbing, reacquainting themselves with your soft figure. you both didn't last long—how could you when you were so eager—but felt satisfied all the time after everything was said and done, lowering back onto the mattress, flushed and panting, a faint sheen of sweat shimmering over your skin. his question just now had puzzled you. it was simple, but you knew it hid something deeper, he'd never asked something of that nature in all the time he'd been coming back and going away.

"well.. not much really. i go to work at the jewelry shop, have tea with your grandmother on thursdays, wander around the market if i feel up to it, help mary from down the street with her boys if she needs it."

you faltered at the mention of her, not remembering whether you'd seen her husband when you'd met with zeke at the entrance to the zone. you forced yourself not to frown. how selfish of you, you didn't even bother to check on her before you allowed yourself to be whisked away for the night.

he seemed to notice your sudden dismay, wrapping a comforting arm around you as he spoke, "you mean aksoy?" you nodded. "he made it back on the train alright. drunk off his ass, but alive."

you breathed a small sigh of relief, offering up a small smile at him. "good to hear."

and though his lips curled back in a similar expression, it didn't quite reach his eyes, and you only felt further perturbed by how his gaze briefly flickered elsewhere. "why do you ask?" you prompted, fingers trailing up his neck to rest at his jaw, gently turning him to face you again.

"just curious, is all.."

you could sense that he was lying, but about what you didn't quite know. "come on, zeke, we've known each other since we were kids. you don't think i know when you're hiding something?"

he hummed, the corners of his eyes creasing as an easy, genuine grin graced his features. "i apologize for underestimating your lie detecting skills."

you couldn't help but giggle softly at his words, thumb stroking over his warm cheek, body fitting perfectly against his. he was really here. finally, after all this waiting, he had come back to you, even if only for a few weeks that would surely fly past in an instant.

"i don't really know how to say this.." he seemed uncharacteristically sheepish, grey eyes traversing over your face, onto a far wall of the room, then up to the ceiling for a brief moment before it finally wandered back to you, "i guess you could say it started with me feeling a bit guilty, leaving you here all by yourself."

"i can bear the wait, you know that. as long as i know that i'll get to see you." for now, came the silent addendum.

he had three years left, barely a quarter remaining in his term, but you didn't broach the topic, and he seemed just as content putting off the discussion as you were. your relationship was easy, in a sense. there was never any squabbling over when the two of you would move in, or when he would retire from his position and settle down, milestones such as marriage and children were never issues. but there were days where you wished they were, though you'd never admit it.

just like how you'd never admit to the warm burn of envy that sparked to life when a man came into the shop you worked at searching for a ring for his partner, a spark that inevitably gave way to a cool emptiness settling deep into your chest, swallowing up your heart and balling an uncomfortable lump in your throat by the time you'd helped him choose out just the perfect jewel and sent him on his way.

"i know that, but," he swallowed, licking his lips, "sometimes i'm afraid that you're getting bored."

"bored?" the word felt strangely odd on your tongue, your own eyes blinking at him.

"bored." he reaffirmed, frowning slightly as he continued, "you see other people your age—our age—every day, don't you? when you go to the market, when you're at work, hell, even when you're spending time with your friends, you see people with lives, with structure." you knew the exact words that were coming next, but the impact of them hurt all the same. "people who don't have the thought of how time is running out hanging over their head."

it was you who turned away this time, feeling your lower lip tremble, eyes suddenly watering despite how you wished not to cry. all those complicated feelings you'd pushed down in favor of relishing in your feigned ignorance, of pretending that zeke was just a normal soldier with normal duties who was just lucky enough to come back each time. you'd always politely brushed your friends off when they'd pestered you of the absence of a ring on your finger, asking when you'd have children of your own rather than always being there to help them take care of theirs, you swept their concerns aside with a rehearsed smile because you didn't want to come to terms with the fact that you wanted those things for yourself.

the pill of zeke's looming mortality was hard enough to swallow on its own, all without mentioning how the love you shared was so rich yet so fleeting, fruitful yet futile all at once. you had no words to offer him, but your silence seemed to be enough of a reply, a forlorn, almost remorseful look settling over his handsome features.

"perhaps— perhaps you should search for someone else." you felt your stomach knot and twist, sorrow bubbling up like a geyser from below, biting at your cheek as to not let your shaky breaths spill from your mouth, "you're beautiful, it would really be no trouble at all for you to find someone—someone who can give you a good life. a fulfilling life."

"but.. there's still time left, isn't there?" your voice was quiet, thick with restrained tears, "there's still time for us."

"it isn't fair to you."

"it wouldn't be fair to you either if i left now." your brows knitting together, expression strained as you felt warmth trickle down your face, dripping down your chin onto his shoulder. "do you want me to leave?"

he looked away, hesitating just enough to make more droplets bead at your lashes before he shook his head, drawing a crooked finger across your cheek to catch a few stray tears. again, that disdain at your own selfishness came. he was worried for you, ruminating own his own impending death, trying to soften the blow of it for you at the expense of his own happiness, yet all you could do was cry at the thought of parting with him in any voluntary way.

"you're the one i want." you whispered, sniffling, "i knew what i was getting into at the start of all this, the things that i would miss, the things i would have to give up on, but they can wait. i can't be without you, not if i know that i can spend a single moment longer like this, loving you."

the sun had sank low in the sky, light abandoning the two of you in the dark of your room, alone with your shared, trembling breaths, his frown and distant eyes, your tears and imploring gaze. you felt weary in many ways as you allowed yourself to settle back onto his chest, closing your eyes at the feeling of his arm tightening its grasp around you, holding you close, a silent plea to stay just as you were.

he didn't speak, not another word of uncertainty exchanged, but you knew that he understood. he was here, and as long as that was the case you would always wait, keep turning down the hands that beckoned you, rescind your domestic desires for the sake of clinging to this one rare, importunate, lovely thing you had—clinging to him.

[sidespromptblog]

A Close Friend: (2/2)

One

Warnings: Crying (Roman), Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Talk of suicidal thoughts (Past Logan), and Roman calling Janus ‘Deciet’ instead of his actual name multiple times. 

Summary: Roman goes to Logan in order to vent and ramble about everything that had happened about Thomas, Patton, and Janus. But in the process finds Logan dealing with his own bottled emotions, as well as an uncomfortable thought that Logan has been dealing with as of late that leaves Roman scared for Logan’s own safety. So he decided to help, in whatever way that he can.

AO3 LINK

Word Count: 3876

Logan woke groggily, with a feeling of warmth surrounding him as his head remained buried under a mound of blankets and his body surrounded by a wall of pillows blocking out the outside world from his cocoon of sleep. For a solid few minutes, he wanted to stay like that, tucked away so that he would never have to bother with anything outside of his little nest ever again. Although logically he knew that eventually, he’d have to. He had duties, and more than that… he had to face just what he had confessed to Roman the previous night. 

Just the thought of it made his stomach squirm, as feelings of shame, embarrassment, and guilt writhed around inside of him. 

Why had he said that? What on earth had possessed him to drop all of that on Roman right then and there. He was usually so reserved around the other side, and seeing him when the creative side had witnessed him so openly weeping…

It had made everything just spill out of him like a faucet that couldn’t be turned off. But then again…

The memory of being cradled so gently in the other side’s arms made a warmth erupt in his heart and face, the feeling of Roman’s hands gingerly carding through his hair in an effort to soothe his endless sobs made him feel safe.

Opening his eyes was a trial in itself, as they felt so crusty and dry from the endless crying he had done the previous night.

A pang of something slammed into his heart.

That’s right… Roman had caught him crying, Roman had heard him say what he’d said, and Roman had... 

Cracking open his eyes Logan found himself staring point-blank at Roman’s chest. Somehow in the middle of the night, they had both wound up curling into each other. Roman’s arms securely wrapped around Logan, keeping him fixed to his chest where Logan’s cheek had remained smushed against him for the entire night. Roman’s expression was peaceful, letting Logan know that he hadn’t yet woken up despite the mid-afternoon light that was pouring through the windows, only halted by the curtains surrounding the bed. The soft little snores that left the creative side sounded like that of a little bear, tucked away from the winter and in the warmth of his own little cave. 

All in all, it was… nice. 

It was nice to be held like this, and to know that Roman clearly didn’t mind having him so close. 

For a moment he fancied the idea of letting his eyes close again, of just sinking back into a lovely slumber that would undoubtedly bring him back to the peaceful dream that he had been having before he had woken up. It would be easy, just one movement, for his eyes to slide shut and not open until Roman chose to wake him up again. His fingers clenched into the fabric of Roman’s shirt, as he unconsciously nestled his face against the other side’s warm chest that was already making him sleepy once again. A yawn tugged at the edge of his lips, teasing him and offering him the very thing he had wanted the night before.

 With Roman here, there was no doubt about whether or not he’d sleep well. 

Fingers tangled themselves into Logan’s hair, smoothing down his hair. “Don’t go back to sleep just yet,” Logan’s eyes that had been attempting to drift shut, snapped open glancing up at the creative side. Sleep hung onto the other, with the remnants being cleared away as Roman lifted his hand up from Logan’s back to rub at his eyes. “We’ve got so much to do today, so we can’t sleep the whole day away. Right?”

Of course, Roman had mentioned something about doing something.

Honestly, it had just slipped his mind with all of the heightened emotions he had been feeling last night, and really… he had honestly just thought Roman was just saying that to get his mind off of what he had said. Roman had never wanted to spend time with him before after all, so the idea that he actually meant it…

It was rather surprising. 

Roman’s fingers raked through Logan’s messy bedhead, attempting to pull the logical side out of whatever had made his eyes look so far away and foggy. The pleased look from the other that this action earned him made Roman want to smile and never stop. He’d made good progress with Logan last night, to the point where now Logan wasn’t even trying to hide the things that made him happy. A part of him would have been content enough to just lay here, with Logan’s head resting so comfortably on his chest, letting the other stew in the comfort of his room. 

But he’d already made plans, and these were plans that he wasn’t going to cancel. 

“Come on,” Roman grunted lifting himself off of the feathery softness of his own bed, only to find himself fighting a strange sense of disappointment when Logan finally lifted his head up, detaching their limbs from one another. “Let’s get dressed, wear something comfortable for you. I’m going to take you on a trip today.”

“Are you going to tell the others?” There was a bolt of dead silence between them, as Roman’s legs hung over the edge of his bed, his back turned to Logan. “About… what I said?” 

A torrent of emotions riled Roman’s insides at the very loaded question that had come so early in the morning for both of them. It was… as much as he disliked it, a very valid question to have about what he’d heard and what he’d seen Logan going through. It wasn’t something that he could just ignore, and it wasn’t something that could just be swept under the rug. Feelings and emotions like that… they didn’t just go away after one good night's rest and one good day spent. It had to be worked on, and… Roman knew that there were going to be slipping days. Where Logan would inevitably fall back into that rabbit hole of dark thoughts, where he missed the feeling of being sad even if he was doing better. 

“I don’t know.” He honestly said, and he didn’t. There wasn’t much that sides could do in order to help their own mental issues. “Do you want me to tell them?” 

He could feel the other side of the bed shifting as Logan scrunched up where they had just been laying together. He could imagine what the logical side looked like. His legs pulled up to his chest, perhaps hugging a pillow, or maybe just sitting there looking away from Roman with thoughts and emotions that the creative side didn’t really understand yet. 

“I don’t think I want them to know,” Logan finally spoke. “I know for certain that I don’t want Thomas to know, and I can’t promise I won’t have those thoughts and feelings again. I’m sure that they will come back, even if it's not now…” 

Finally Roman turned to look at Logan, the look on his face speaking volumes as to what he was feeling without words even being needed. Reaching over, he grasped the top of Logan’s hand holding it tight enough to get the other’s attention on him and not the wrinkled blankets in his grasp. 

“Logan, I never expected you to not feel those things.” Roman sternly but softly began. “I just don’t want you to deal with them alone. I don’t want you to promise to never try to feel them again, but… maybe to come to someone about them. Be it me, Patton, or Virgil. I don’t want you to have to deal with those kinds of thoughts alone, we…” Roman gave his hand one more squeeze. “We’re stronger together rather than alone, you taught me that remember?” 

An absolutely heart-wrenching look of happiness appeared on Logan’s face at Roman’s reminder, he had taught Roman that. That the chimera was best fought with friends, after recuperating and taking time to rest one's wounds rather than continuously trying to go it alone again and again. How had he forgotten his own lesson so easily? 

It hadn’t been that long ago either. 

“I promise, whoever you decide to go to for help… I’ll be there alongside you should they give you any shit for it.” At that moment Roman felt a little bit of Remus’ wildness, as he grinned sharply back at Logan, a promise of violence somewhere in those words of his that his brother would most definitely be proud of. Had he heard it? But that was to be discussed for a later date, and later arguments should the others decide to not help Logan at all. “Now get dressed dork, I’ve got a lot planned.”  

The purely puzzled but equally curious look on Logan’s face ignited a fierce determination and excitement inside of him. 

A determination to make this the best day possible for this logical side. 

“Why are we out in the real world?” Logan asked almost as soon as they rose up just far from Thomas’ actual house, this wasn’t the mindspace… So Roman wasn’t just going to summon things in the imagination to please Logan and call it a day? “I’m afraid… I don’t quite understand.” He softly admitted, nervously tugging at the strings of the hoodie he had decided to wear. “What if Thomas or one of the others needs us for something?” 

Roman didn’t answer, his face gaining a somewhat cloudy look that told Logan easily enough that this wasn’t necessarily a good topic. 

Instead, he seized Logan’s hand in his own, holding it tight. “Fuck ‘em.” Roman declared, a rather reckless grin playing on his lips. “They can deal until we come back, and really… this is a day for us to enjoy, so let’s enjoy it. No mindspace, no Thomas, and no… problems. Just a fun day out, with lots of real places to go and enjoy for once.” No having Thomas around to tell them what they could or couldn’t do so that they didn’t raise a ruckus, that was the best part in Roman’s opinion. 

But even so, Logan couldn’t help but to nod his head slowly. 

Yes… fun.

Fun. 

How long had it been since he’d had fun with one of the other sides, no… how long had it been since he’d done something fun with Roman that didn’t involve the imagination in some capacity? Or even Patton just strong-arming Roman into making sure that Logan got to come along for the ride, even if he didn’t necessarily enjoy it half of the time.

Roman wanted him here this time, and Roman was smiling at him promising to do things that he’d enjoy as well. 

A tentative smile curled on the logical side’s face, “That sounds rather enjoyable,” He gave Roman’s hand an affirming squeeze. “Lead the way then… Princey.” 

Roman couldn’t help but to let out a good-natured snort at the sound of his old nickname, it had been so long since he’d heard it after all. But more than that… it felt almost empowering to know that Logan had placed his trust in him, to know that he had Logan’s full support with everything that they were going to do today. 

Without so much as another word, he led Logan away and towards the fun that they were both destined to have today; not even looking back once to wonder about the other sides and the human that they were leaving behind for their adventures. 

It was a day for them after all, nobody else. 

 Leading Logan through all of the events he’d planned for him, it honestly kind of shocked Roman as to how much he hadn’t known that he’d been kind of neglecting Logan as a friend. The uncertain responses that he got from Logan, which eventually bridged into full unbridled excitement that had been hiding away for far too long only served as a way to prove Roman’s thoughts correct. Logan had barely let go of his hand in the entire time that they’d started their day trip, not that Roman minded exactly, he’d held him firm as he talked and rambled about the things and places that Roman brought him to. 

So much interesting history, history that Roman would have otherwise brushed off on account of it being too “boring” or too… Logan-ish for him.

It certainly didn’t help the guilt that continuously seemed to boil in his stomach ever since seeing Logan’s breakdown from the previous night. 

If anything, it only served as a way to make him feel just the slightest bit worse for not listening in the first place. 

It was only when settling down with lunch that Logan finally released Roman’s hand and in turn stopped what he was talking about. 

Almost immediately Roman looked over at him, after having spread out the picnic blanket and all of their food, he had almost expected Logan to go off about something like the origins of picnics and how they were created, or something like that. But instead, Logan merely just laid on his back staring up at the sky as the clouds lazily inched across casting vague shadows onto the earth where they were laying. 

“Roman.” Logan softly began, the tone of his voice marginally different than before. Almost immediately Roman’s attention was focused on him, the food surrounding them nothing more than an afterthought. “Why did you come to my room last night?” Glancing over to him, Logan held an almost sad smile on his face. “It can’t have been for anything good right? Up until last night, I’m sure that you hated me and my face.” 

Ah…

The conversation that Roman really didn’t want to have, and the conversation that Logan intuitively knew to ask about. 

A sigh broke through his silence as the creative side rubbed at his face, “Well,” He almost stubbornly began, “First things first, I have not and will never hate you.” Roman started off, pointing his finger in Logan’s direction that sour feeling of guilt bubbling anew. “I don’t think I ever understood you, or how you thought maybe… but never hate. Never.” Knowing what he did now… he could never hate Logan, it was something that he should have realized a long time ago. But in the very least… it was a good thing he was realizing it now and not later when it was too late. “And Second…” Roman grimaced, the memories of Deceit’s… or rather Janus’ reveal tasting like poison on his tongue. 

Logan sat up abruptly at the emotions that flew over Roman’s face like a hurricane ripping through the gulf, his stretched-out legs easily tucking under him as he seemed to give Roman his full attention. His eyes hidden as they were behind his glasses, remained firmly fixed to the creative side's face. 

“What happened?”

There really was no hiding it, was there? 

Roman wanted to snort at the irony of it all, try as he may to hide something. Be that Remus, his own emotions, or just how he was trying and failing to deal with his own shortcomings… everything always came out in one way or another. It was better to just get it all out now, rather than to let someone else tell it without taking his side of the story into context first. 

Hopefully, Logan wouldn’t judge him too harshly for it…

“Roman?” 

The side in question almost smiled, it seemed like it was Logan’s turn to be the one confronting the creative side about his own emotions, as well as the consequences of them. But then again… That’s what friends were for right? He’d said so just last night, when he had tucked Logan away from all of his bad thoughts, and given him the best dream he could possibly think of. 

Logan was his friend, so of course, he’d want to help and hear out Roman’s grievances about what had happened. 

“I…” Roman sighed to himself yet again as he ran his hands over his face, “Messed up.” He lamely explained, grimacing at the terrible explanation that even a toddler could do better than him. “Deceit told us his name… like Virgil did, and I uh… I made fun of it. I didn’t hold back, not like I did with Virgil. After everything that had happened with the wedding, the trial, and… the aftermath I was just so angry for everyone trying to pull me every which way. I was angry at myself for…” Roman stopped, he hadn’t realized when he’d started it, but he’d started to rant. His hands making exaggerated motions as he told Logan about what he’d said about Deceit’s name, and just how far he’d gone when it seemed like Deceit was going to be accepted with no issue. He hadn’t even realized he was ranting until he’d needed to take a breath. “Sorry…” 

Instead of just waving him off, however, or even starting to eat like they’d planned on doing Logan merely cocked his head to the side a curiously befuddled expression on his face. 

“Sorry for what?” The logical side asked, “I asked what was wrong and you’re explaining it to me. You don’t have to apologize to me for talking, I’m here to listen.” 

It was said so simply, but the Roman had the feeling that the words themselves were something that Logan would've wanted to hear months ago when he was airing his own thoughts towards anyone. And as such, it made them so very important to the logical side… it made them true. 

Roman knew that for certain, and yet… it didn’t stop the flood of gratitude that filled his heart. 

Swallowing thickly he nodded, and carried on his voice carrying out well until the sun started to dip behind the trees. By then his chest felt lighter, and his mind clearer as Logan sat there not once daring to look away from Roman as he talked about everything. From his complicated feelings about Patton and Janus, to how he felt about having to switch it up so often with the both of them that it was just leaving him exhausted to the point where he just wanted to agree to get it all over with and save himself the emotional rollercoaster of dealing with the two other sides. Because at least then, he wouldn’t be criticized so harshly, and at least then he would know what was correct and what was wrong in the eyes of Patton. 

Logan understood that notion perfectly well.  

“Sometimes I just don’t know what to do, and I’m angry at myself for it. I want to just decide about something and have that be the end of it, I don’t want to have to come back a week or even a month later and have a whole discussion about what I did being morally wrong, “technically morally wrong but kind of right”, I just want that to be it!” Roman’s chest heaved, and by the end of his rant, he felt the frustrated tears he’d been holding back since that day finally flow down his cheeks as warbling croaking sob cracked in his chest like a broken instrument determined to never play again. “I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to be wrong...” He sniffled, bringing his hands up to his eyes desperate to wipe away his tears. 

However, almost as soon as he moved to shield his tears from sight, he found himself crushed into a hug. His head pressed solidly against Logan’s collarbone, as the logical side mimicked the motion that Roman himself had done just the other night as he ran his fingers through the creative side’s hair. If anything, the genuine comfort that the other side was attempting to give only made Roman shake harder as he clutched Logan tightly. 

It felt so nice to finally be on the receiving end of comfort after so long of just giving it. 

“I think…” Logan gently whispered, not daring to make his voice louder. “What I’ve learned is that you can try and try to choose the answer that will always please somebody else. But… it won’t work, if they don’t even know what they want then they will always find some fault with it, and that’s not your fault.” Feeling Roman stilling in his arms Logan didn’t dare to stop. “The best you can do in that situation is to make yourself happy, not for their approval… but your own. If they like it, then that’s perfectly fine. If not…” Logan gave an awkward shrug that the creative side only clung to harder. “Then they can make their own choices, and see just how difficult it is to do. Pleasing everyone all the time is impossible and if you try you’re still going to end up stepping on someone’s toes, I’ve learned that the hard way.” 

Plucking up the napkins that they had prepared for the lunch, Logan hastily moved to wipe away Roman’s tears, trying to be gentle the entire time he did. 

He’d thought before that Roman was practically his opposite in the past, but seeing the other side breakdown from all the expectations that had been placed on him without the creative side even knowing… Logan felt a strange kind of understanding with him. The same kind that he’d gained when he’d had all the expectations placed on him to make Thomas succeed in school and in college. The kind that had made him want to stop existing in the first place, when Thomas had just up and decided to switch majors and pursue YouTube as a full-time job instead of being a scientist. 

He knew what Roman was feeling all too well, so with this kind of emotion, he could at least help instead of being a hindrance to everyone around him.

Roman sniffled once again, taking the napkin from Logan so that he could blow his nose, “Logan,” He flopped back onto the blanket, looking up at the stars that were just barely beginning to show in the night sky. “We should do this more often.” He said, glancing over to the logical side who shot him a concerned and very much confused look.

“Cry about our repressed feelings?”   

For the first time in a while, a real laugh erupted out of Roman at the sound of Logan’s genuine confusion and uneasiness about his offer. 

“No,” The creative side moved his hand over to the other’s, clenching it softly in his. “Going out like this, just the two of us. Maybe once a week or once a month. Just enjoy each other's company, and talk about whatever we want to talk about. Even if we get on each others’ nerves sometimes…” Roman smiled ruefully. “I like talking with you, and I like listening to you too.” 

A look of understanding dawned on Logan’s face, and with it, the logical side finally laid down beside Roman. 

Their were hands still clutching one anothers’.

“I’d like that Roman,” Logan smiled up at the starry sky that finally became visible to them both. “I’d like that a lot.”  

[mrvltwimagines]

You Deserve Better

SPENCER REID X READER

SUMMARY: Most coping mechanisms weren’t that healthy, you just couldn’t seem to give yours up.

WARNINGS: Self-Harm, Self-Deprecation, Insecurities/Low Self-Esteem

WORD COUNT: 4.4k

REQUESTED PROMPT: Hey. I was wondering if i could request Spencer Reid x Reader where reader struggles with self harm (cutting mostly) and self esteem issues, half convinced he should leave them for someone more mentally stable? - i changed it up a bit so it’s not that he should leave them, but more so go after someone “better”

You groaned at the sound of your phone ringing, pulling you out of your deep sleep and waking you up in your room that was still only lit by moonlight. 

“This is y/n,” you answered your phone without looking at the caller id.

“Good morning, or rather good night, whatever - it’s three am, either will work,” the bright voice of Garcia sounded out over the speaker. You couldn’t help the chuckle that left your mouth.

“Do we have a case?” you ask, getting her back on track.

“Unfortunately so, can you get into the office soon?” she asks.

“Yeah, i’ll be there in twenty minutes or so,” and with that you both said your goodbyes and you were quickly getting out of bed. 

With your first initial stretch you flinched at the pain that spread through your arm. You lightly soothed the ache you felt on your wrist, refusing to pull up your long sleeve and look at the horrible work you did to yourself last night.

You loved your job. You couldn’t imagine yourself doing anything else, but most of the cases were hard on your mental health. It made it all that much harder that while you’re an official part of the team, you still feel less intelligent and needed as everyone else. They never said anything to indicate that you could be better, or that you were even a bad team member to begin with, it just sat badly with you that you didn’t know as much as Spencer did (although, no one does) and that you weren’t able to piece things together quite as quickly as everyone else on the team. You were the youngest one, and also the newest one having joined just under two years ago. You were always learning and picking up skills to better your ideologies and techniques to catching serial killers, but in your head you could do better.

You knew there were better ways to cope with your stress and feelings of incompetence than taking it out on your own skin with a razor, but it’s what you’ve been doing for years and with your job it was the quickest way to feel any type of peace. 

Luckily for you, your job was also one that made you forget your own emotions and issues, at least during the time of working the cases. There wasn’t much time to dwell on your own problems when you were busy trying to find a murderer. At least your job can remind you that there is worse in the world than the hatred you hold for yourself.

In just under thirty minutes you were dressed, packed and walking into the conference room just as J.J. showed up too, the whole team ready to get a move on with the case. You made eye contact with Spencer and he sent you a gentle smile as you took your usual seat in between him and Rossi.

“Alright team, it’s a doozy,” Garcia chirps, filling us in on the details of the case we were about to set out on. After reading through the files and seeing the pictures, it was a quick “wheels up in thirty” from Hotch that lead everyone out of the conference room to do whatever they needed to do or gather before heading off to the jet. 

“So, did you guys plan on matching, or is that just a soulmate thing?” Derek asked as he drank his coffee and walked backwards in front of you and Spencer leaving the conference room at the same time. You looked at Spencer’s outfit seeing his purple attire and couldn’t help the smile from forming on your face seeing you were wearing a long sleeve shirt about the same shade as his.

“Maybe I felt it in my soul that he was going to wear that so I chose my purple shirt,” you quipped, rolling your eyes at Derek as he winked and turned back around to head to his desk and grab his bag. 

“So how was your day off?” Spence began, “Did you do anything fun?”

Your mind flashed back to the last twenty-four hours, thinking about how you spent it. The burning on your arm became more apparent and you could feel your face flush at the secret you were hiding from him. The two of you were closest on the team. It might have helped that he was only a few years older than you, or that you had the same views on everything, or that you were able to understand a lot of what he says or even just his nerdy jokes. You loved being around Spencer, and if you could have it your way you two would be more than just friends. Within the few seconds after his question the air was silent and you felt yourself go through a range of all your emotions. 

“It was fine. I just laid around, read some books, watched some tv. The usual,” you shrugged, removing your eye line from his, feeling as if he was able to see inside your mind and see the true things you actually did. Like standing in front of your mirror pointing out all the flaws on your body, or working out until you felt like you were going to faint, or not so carefully carving lines into your own flesh. You were a mess, and you knew that, but the less the team knows the better. You were terrified you’d be kicked off the team, and not only did that mean losing your dream job, but also losing the chance to be working alongside the only man you’ve ever felt even the tiniest bit of love for. 

“What about you, did you do anything fun?” you asked, not wanting to give him the chance to question you more about yourself. As you both grabbed your bags and all the way to car that was driving you to the jet he told you about the little things he did, and all the things he learned and read up on. One thing was for sure, you never felt any true resentment towards how knowledgable Spencer was. If anything you were just always astounded that someone could retain as much information as he does. You knew Spencer was an impossible standard to hold yourself to considering he was an actual genius, you just wish you had something as astounding as his intelligence that others looked to you for. Instead you were just the young, average agent on the team. 

You made small chat with the others as you boarded the jet, and after Garcia hopped on the cam to tell us a little more information as we bounced ideas off of each other, we were left to be on our own for an hour long flight. You and Spencer always sat with each other, but just a few minutes into our own personal time he got up and went across the jet to sit with J.J. to talk to her about something. As much as you just wanted to look out the window and space out, you couldn’t take your eyes away from their interaction and see how hard he smiles when he’s with her. It was dumb to think anything of it considering she has Will and Henry so you knew their interactions weren’t romantically intwined, but you still couldn’t help from floating over her frame and seeing all that you were not. You weren’t skinny like her. You didn’t have a beautiful face, and beautiful hair to frame it. You were average, and you hated that.

You quickly stood up and made your way into the bathroom, locking the door and pressing your forehead against it with a big sigh. All you wanted at the moment was your razor, but you knew the only one you had was buried deep in your bag that was still out where you were sitting. You felt ashamed with yourself that you even felt it was necessary considering all that you did last night, but you were hurting. Without thinking, you pulled your sleeve up, wincing at both the sight of your wrist and the feeling of your shirt sleeve running along the lines. You scratched a bit, letting out a sigh of relief when you felt and saw some of the scabs come undone, leaving small beads of blood to sit on your skin. You felt satisfied enough to grab a wet paper towel and clean yourself up some before pulling your sleeve back down and leaving the bathroom again. 

When you got back out, Spencer was back in his seat and awaiting your arrival. 

“You feeling okay? You look a little pale,” he acknowledged, tilting his head a bit as he inspected you. You habitually connected your hands behind your back as you nodded, telling him you just feel a little nauseous from having woken up so early and not ingesting anything other than coffee. You sat back down next to him, not hesitating to close your eyes and lean on his shoulder. You didn’t see it, but he couldn’t stop himself from looking down at you and smiling. You had your feet tucked underneath you, and your arms resting on your lap. 

He would’ve usually felt a bit creepy looking at you so closely, but the sight of the tiniest bit of blood seeping through your shirt cause his brows to furrow and his attention to be stuck on it.

“Hey y/n?” he whispers, gently nudging you with his shoulder enough for you to groggily open your eyes back up. You looked up at him, concern written all over his face.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, sitting yourself up fully so you can take in his entire face. He seemed to be battling with himself on what to say, and for a second you held your breath thinking he was going to say something along the lines of professing his feelings for you, but instead he just offered a “never mind” and shook his head before looking back down to the files on his lap. You couldn’t hide the disappointment from you face, so you simply turned your head the other way and settled in for a short nap, this time not wanting to touch him. 

Throughout the rest of the jet ride, and all the way to the police station Spencer couldn’t get his mind off of your shirt sleeve. He didn’t know whether it was his business to even question you about it, so he backed off, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to just forget about it. 

He watched you while you worked. He couldn’t help it. He did it out of both concern and admiration. He considered you two best-friends. You had never judged him or made fun of the little things he knows. Instead you always laughed at his jokes or asked him more about a topic if you didn’t know what the hell he was talking about. You had been there for him both inside of work and outside of work, helping him cope with tougher cases, and also helping him cope with his sick mother. You know just about everything in his life and have never showed an ounce of judgement, so he’s trying to do the same, but it deems harder the more he sees the signs. You’re constantly pulling on your sleeves, as if they’ve somehow rolled up your arms on their own. Sometimes you’ll squeeze anywhere between your wrist and elbow and display a look of relief. If he looked closely enough, he could still see the little droplet of blood that he saw earlier, but he determined that if there was anything wrong going on with you, you’d tell him. Right?

You hadn’t missed how Spencer was watching you more than usual. During cases you’re used to working closely considering you bounce off of each other so well, but he doesn’t usually spend so much time looking at you when you’re not even talking. Your mind goes on overdrive, your insecurities settling in. While in one sense all you want is for him to see you, like really see you in a romantic way, in another all you wanted was for him to never look at you that way because then he’ll see your flaws. He’ll see your disproportionate body or your anything but clear skin. You hated to think he’d see you how you see yourself. So when you caught him looking at you for the millionth time that day, you escaped to the bathroom to look at yourself. Your reflection showed nothing out of the ordinary. Your clothes hid whats underneath relatively well, and your makeup hadn’t grown splotchy or anything. You looked how you usually did when you were in your professional setting, so you really can’t pinpoint what the hell he could be looking or thinking when looking at you, but it sure as hell made you uneasy. 

The rest of the day working on the case felt like it went on forever, and then the second day, but finally on the third day you were able to locate and arrest the unsub, saving yet another person from being killed. You loved that part of your job, and you tried to embrace the days you get to the unsub before they’re able to kill another innocent person. 

You reminisced on the flight home, and felt a feeling of personal victory. Due to rooming with Prentiss, you didn’t have enough privacy to do anything harmful to yourself, but the entire trip was a bit of a success in the sense that you didn’t feel the need to bring your blade out. 

You sat in your usual spot next to Spencer on the flight and spaced out as you looked out the window. Your focus was disturbed at the feeling of his elbow nudging you. 

“Would you want to have a movie night tonight? I think i’m finally down to watch that one cheesy vampire movie that you’re always going on about,” he suggested. Your eyes widened as you let out a small squeal, sending a small but gentle clap to his arm.

“Yes! I’d love that! It’s really bad and cheesy, but i love it and definitely want to experience making fun of it with you,” you laughed, your cheeks burning red. You knew he had an eidetic memory, but the fact that he wants to spend time with you and watch a movie that you’ve only talked about wanting to watch with him over the span of months made you feel a bit warm inside. You both agreed on going to your apartment right after you get your reports turned into Hotch just in time for the jet to land and you all to head back to the office. 

Time flew and before you know it you were back at your apartment, doing a quick clean of the small messes you created before leaving for the case as you waited for Spencer to show up with the Chinese food he said he’d grab on the way over. You went into your closet, opting to change into a pajama shirt and shorts before turning to your mirror and grimacing. You’ve worn pajamas exactly like this in front of Spencer many of times, but tonight just felt different. You looked bigger than usual, and you couldn’t stop yourself from turning to the side. Did you somehow get fatter over just a few days away?

The sound of knock at the door and it opening alerted you that Spencer was here.

“Hello!” he calls out just as you walk out of your bedroom, trying to forget your previous thoughts. 

“Sorry i took so long, i decided to stop at home real quick to put on comfier clothes,” he commented while setting down and spreading out all the food on the coffee table without looking your way. You gnawed on your lip, thinking about how you weren’t hungry anymore but leaving it be and forcing yourself to be in the mood for Chinese for the sake of not wanting to seem rude.

“It’s fine! Thank you again for picking up dinner,” you mumbled out, walking closer to him and taking a seat on the couch. He didn’t hesitate to sit down right next to you and put his arm on the back of the cushion behind you. 

“So, you have the movie ready?” He asks while looking down at you. Your mind was on overdrive at how close he was and how you could smell his cologne coming off of him. You could feel the warmth of his side on your own and in that moment all you wanted to do was cuddle into him, but you doubt he would want that. 

You cleared your throat, declaring that it was ready, and you quickly leaned forward to grab the remote and hit play. The beginning scenes to Twilight began to play, and Spencer leaned forward with you to begin plating his own plate full of chicken, noodles and rice. You watched to see how much he put on his plate, envious that a man his size could eat so much and not gain any weight. You plated your own, only taking a little of each entree he got, not wanting to seem ungrateful. He didn’t seem to notice, and you both poured all your attention into the movie.

He watched you plate as little as you could of each entree, and a frown settled on his face. He wouldn’t say you’re a big eater, but he knows for a fact that you would usually plate more than you had. He ignored it this once, assuming you just weren’t that hungry and it wasn’t his place to comment on what you eat. He was just happy to be as close to you as he was, and embraced the warmth he felt radiating off of you. 

All throughout the movie, his mind kept floating back to him watching you over the last case. You definitely had something bothering you, and he took notice that you wore long sleeved shirts every day even though the case was in Louisiana in the middle of spring, so it was at the very least short sleeve weather. Even now you opted for a long sleeve pajama shirt.

“Hey y/n, can i ask you something?” Spencer spoke up in a quieter scene of the movie. You took your eyes off of the screen and looked towards him, your brow furrowing a bit. He sighed, and leant forward to grab the remote and pause the movie entirely. He lifted one of his legs up on the couch to face you more, leaving you with a slight tint to your cheeks at even more of his body touching yours.

“I don’t want to overstep my boundaries, but i consider you my best friend so at this point i feel like there aren’t many boundaries,” he started to ramble, as you just nod at his words. He paused to look at your face, and in that moment you felt a bit exposed.

“I’ve just noticed some habits of yours that concern me a bit?” he stated, but it sounded more like a question. Your heart rate picked up, and your eyes grew wide. This conversation could go so many ways, and to be honest you didn’t think there was any one way you wanted it to go. He took your silence as a go to continue what he was saying, even though he could tell by your facial expression that you were a bit uncomfortable. He just wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if he didn’t at least question you about it.

“Can i look at your wrists?” he bluntly asks. You’re taken aback, your entire body physically flinching away at that question, and your eyes grow wider than before. You didn’t know what to say, or if you could even say anything that wouldn’t make you seem guiltier than actually showing him your wrists. You kept opening and closing your mouth like a fish stuck on dry land, and you could tell by the look on Spence’s face that he already knew the truth behind the habits he was taking notice of. Your eyes welled up a bit, before simply laying your hands in his lap and looking away from him. He knew what you meant and you shuddered at the feeling of him rolling your sleeves up. 

You were embarrassed. You were ashamed. You were really fucking scared. What if he thinks less of you now? What if he reports you to Hotch? What if he’s disgusted by you and this ruins everything? Your mind was going crazy, and he still hadn’t said anything even though you know he’s had plenty of time to take in the sight of your cut up wrists. 

“Oh y/n,” he sighs, and the sound of his voice gets you to look at him again. He didn’t hold judgement or pity in his features, simply just concern and something else that you couldn’t pinpoint.

“I know it’s a stupid habit and that i shouldn’t do it. But it helps and no one’s found out so far,” you shrug, a few of you tears falling before you grab your wrist out of his grip to wipe them away. You felt more guilt than sadness building up inside of you, along with a large amount of insecurity. 

“Well i just did, so what are we going to do about that?” He asks. you shrug again, looking away from his face and down to your exposed arms, quickly pulling your sleeves back down.

“How about you tell me why you do it? Or things that make you feel like that’s your last resort.”

You look back up to him, so badly wanting to tell him everything that goes through your mind, but if him finding out about your self harm isn't enough to drastically change your friendship, telling him all about your insecurities sure as hell would.

“I don’t know, Spence. I don’t want to put all of this on you and have it ruin our friendship,” you whispered out, using your sleeve to wipe another escaping tear. 

“I’m telling you right now that nothing you say could change the love i have for you, i can promise you that,” his words struck you. You both have said you love each other, it comes with being best-friends and living a dangerous life where you never know where the next moment could bring you, but this confession of love felt different and made your already faster heart beat raise a bit more.

“I...” you pause, not knowing how to form your thoughts into sentences, “I just get frustrated about- i get upset about everything about myself,” you start off. You looked at him semi expecting him to have something to say but instead he just nods, like to indicate for you to keep speaking. You let out an exasperated sigh, almost in disbelief that you were even in this situation and having this conversation.

“I’m not good enough for you,” you spit out, bringing your hand up to cover your mouth as you just stared at him. His brows furrowed and you knew he was thinking deeply about your confession.

“I’m so in love with you, Spence. I love how smart you are and how you can answer any of my questions. I love the tangents you go on, and how you’re still able to be charming and funny. But you’re also crazy attractive and i feel beyond selfish to even think i deserve to be with someone like you. I’m so average. I’m not skinny, i’m not that pretty, i have fucking cuts lining my entire arm. The only good thing i’ve accomplished in life is graduating college and landing a spot in the team, but even then i feel like i don’t deserve my spot when there are so many others who are smarter and quicker to do my job better than me,” you spoke. Your words came out without you making the connection between your brain and mouth, and by the end of it you were embarrassed. You let yourself say too much, and you were worried this would be where Spencer would want to leave.

“I never mean it lightly when i say I love you, you know that right? Both within the team and outside of it, i’ve only said I love you to five or so people, and never have i meant them like i do for you,” he started off, grabbing your hands back from you so you were forced to face him and look him in the eyes, “You’re fucking beautiful, scars and all, i don’t care about them. Well, i do because i hate how they got there and i want to help that stop, but i don’t care that you have them. I don’t look at you and see the imperfections that only you seem to notice. I see my best friend that’s helped me through so much. I see a sweet, intelligent, beautiful person who treats me well and brings me so much comfort. I think you’re a badass agent, and i know the team would agree with me on that, and hopefully i can help you see that, but it’s fine if you don’t see any of this right now because now i get to stay by your side and help expose the truth about you to yourself.” he spoke. you nodded throughout everything he was saying, taking every word in and finding so much comfort in everything.

“okay,” you mumbled out. 

“Okay, you’ll let me?” He questioned, “You’ll let me stay by your side?” 

“Of course, Spence. I love you, and i’m so grateful for you,” at that point you didn’t know what else to say. You were surprised to hear him say so much good about you, but you knew Spencer didn’t lie. He found telling the truth was always the best and easiest option, it was something he took pride in. 

The rest of the night was spent with him actually physically not leaving your side. After a bit more talking, he unpaused the movie and you joked throughout the rest of it with your head leaning on his chest while he combed through your hair with his fingers. You felt the ball of guilt leave your system and instead felt your body flood with relief. He knew your secrets and he was still here. You should’ve never doubted him, and you had wished you confided in him earlier, but now that you have you feel like you have a second chance. It’s been a long time since you’ve had a constant someone in your life, and now having the man that you love know your deepest secrets, things are bound to look up.

[sxfik]

and when the seasons change (will you stand by me?)

read on ao3 • main masterlist • law school masterlist

summary: when kang sol's mother has to work late, she has to take care of byeol. it's just her luck that she has an exam the next day, one for professor yang of all people. joon hwi, being the kind classmate he is, offers to study with her.

or: byeol is solhwi mastermind, and she's says everything we wanted to say to the two dummies.

request by anon: hiya! saw that you do solhwi prompts so I was thinking that Sol A has to babysit byeol but there's a big test the next day so she calls joon hwi over to help her w studying. meanwhile byeol(being iconic) tries to set them up in true shipper fashion.

a/n: this is based on a request i got on tumblr, pictured above! i have around 5 (ish) fics that will go out over the week so stay tuned for those lmao! uh yeah, i don't really know what else to say other than im really sad law school ended so i've just been sad and mopey, but still writing to fill that hole. as always, enjoy <333

Although Joon Hwi was the 'star' student of Hankuk Law School, he was never much for studying. It's not because everything came to him that easily, but because finding the strength to concentrate and study when he could be hanging out with his friends or doing anything better with his time was insanely tempting. Finding the effort to get to the library, and read up on his textbooks was arduous and he always found it easier to study by himself, no distractions around. This was, of course, until Kang Sol came along. For Joon Hwi, everything in his life was turned on its axis when she came into his life.

When he first met her, in Professor Yang's class, she was just the poor girl being grilled by the professor. His heart went out to her, watching her pull her hair out of the bun to avoid the question. He didn’t know what possessed him to answer for her, but he assumed it to be a one time thing. But from the moment she crashed into him yelling "Second Round Judicial Exam, save me!", he was stuck on her.

Slowly, she was everywhere in his life, from the study group to the legal clinic to a majority of his classes. Unlike so many of his classmates, who were by the book and generally clinical in personality, she was a fireball of energy and passion. In class, despite not being the best student, she would argue with so much passion and energy that it was impossible to win against her. It was fascinating, watching her connect and jump from case to case. She would throw herself into everything she believed in, which included defending him from the school and his uncle.

Joon Hwi has liked girls before, but he's never been so captivated and head-over-heels for anyone in his life. Love and dating seemed secondary, and he preferred to keep it out of his life until he reached his goals. You could call him selfish but he prefers to call it being focused on his goals. He's always had one goal in life, and it was to work with the law, whether as a judge or working as police or as a prosecutor.

Yet, if Kang Sol was in the room, his eyes were on her. Whether she was frustrated at him or teasing him or gleeful with him, he couldn't help but smile at her. If she was around, he was right by her side, making her laugh or cringe or annoyed.

So there he was, studying in the school library with Kang Sol. Professor Yang’s exam was right around the corner and unlike last time, he cannot miss the comma in the given case. Plus, he doesn’t even have the excuse of being accused of a murder this time, so both Sol and Joon Hwi were hunched over their books, pouring into the texts when Kang Sol’s phone blared loudly from her bag, startling them both.

Sol cringed as she dug around in her cloth bag, the classic dirty looks tossed her way by the sleep deprived students as she stood to leave the library and take the call. He buried himself back into the textbook, but the concentration was lost and he was more interested in the call she’d gotten than ins and outs of defamation laws.

Around 10 minutes later, Sol was speeding back to her chair, the phone clutched firmly in her hand. But Joon hwi could see her frustration from a mile away. Her face held that pout, her eyebrows furrowed and grumbling under her breath. It was adorable.

But he was worried, considering it was the day before the exam, Sol couldn’t afford to be distracted from her studies. He wasn’t blind to her struggles in school, but Joon Hwi never considered her lesser than him for not being able to pick up the concepts with speed.

Unlike him, and a majority of his classmates, she had passion and a heart when dealing with clients. He could see it in her mannerisms with clients in the legal clinic, patiently explaining the clause or the issues they might face to the client. She’s sympathetic to the max, always hearing out the client’s grievances before making a judgement on what they had done. She was exactly what the world needed: a sympathetic, patient lawyer that was willing to fight for the client, someone that they can cling to. He and every professor in the school knew it, but it seemed Sol was the only one who never realized how essential she was.

Suddenly, he felt himself getting up to gather his materials with her without a second thought, despite the confused look Sol shot him. He wasn’t sure what exactly possessed him to do it, but he knew that if she wasn’t there, he didn’t want to study at the library either. Grinning at her, he walked out, side by side until they were outside the quiet library. She paused in her tracks all of a sudden, taking him by surprise and he paused too, looking back at her, tilting his head in confusion.

"My mom needs to work late today, so I need to rush home and take care of Byeol," she looked up at him finally, her face apologetic. "I'm sorry, Joon hwi but I don't think I'll be able to study for the exam with you," she started to walk away, but he couldn't let her go that easily.

"I'll come with you," he offered, surprising himself, "I'll study with you. Plus, it'll be easier to take care of Byeol with two people than one, right?"

She paused, looking back at him, conflicted. Sighing, Joon Hwi stepped closer to her. "Come on, let's not keep her waiting. Shall we?" He was determined to keep her company, especially since she’d have less time to study since she’d have to take care of Byeol. It was easier this way, and I’d do this for any friend he told himself.

The ride there was slow and quiet, but not an uncomfortable one. They both walked in tandem, with their backpacks filled with everything they'd possibly need to study, and even the bus ride was peaceful, the two of them staring out the window, watching the scenery pass by them. Joon hwi sat beside her, rather than across from her like last time, just to save space on the bus. On the very empty bus they were riding together.

Days like this, where the air was heavy and humid, the earth preparing for a heavy rain, were the most comforting types of days. The air was still warm and humid, making Sol’s hair poof out slightly, her naturally wavy hair frizzing out of her bun. The feeling of her beside him, as if this was a regular ritual for both of them, brought a sense of content in his heart. He couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, whether it was the girl beside him or the past year’s chaos, but watching the trees and the traffic pass by them brought more peace to his life than ever.

The two made their way into the alleyway, where Joon hwi had once stood guard of when Lee Man Ho once lived, threatening her family. He's standing in front of Kang Sol's house behind her, holding her backpack in hand as she struggles with the keys.

Finally, finally, she gets the door open, and a figure zips by, crashing into Sol. Byeol’s arms wrapped Sol's waist, like the adorable sister she is. Sol stumbled back into him slightly at the sudden weight thrown onto her, but nonetheless, crouched to envelop her sister in a bone-crushing hug. Joon hwi couldn’t help but smile at the two sisters, their love for each other enveloping him

"Unnie!" she grinned up at her, "Did you bring him with you?" Her eyes were serious and wide as Sol opened her mouth to answer.

"Byeol-ah!" Joon hwi yelled out from behind Sol, peaking out to see the 8-year old grinning at him, much wider than she did at Sol. Ha!

"Joonhwi-oppa!" the girl squealed out, leaving Sol's grip to run to him. As she ran to him, he picked her up and twirled her in the air, the girl's giggles echoing through the small alleyway as the two greeted each other.

Sol, standing by the door, smiled faintly before calling out, "Come in, before either of you catch a cold!" Both of them filed in, incessantly chattering as if they hadn't seen each other in months, even though it had only been two weeks since Joon hwi had been by to take the two sisters out to the park.

"Oppa! Why did you come with Unnie?" Byeol asked, finally being set down inside the house, looking up at him curiously as Sol

"Ah, we have an exam tomorrow, so I'm here to study with her," Joon hwi replied.

"Good," the girl jumped onto the couch. "Unnie needs a lot of help," the girl quipped back, nodding her head solemnly, making her look a lot older than 8 years.

"Yah Kang Byeol!" Sol exclaimed, indignantly. Joon hwi chuckled at the two as Sol turned to him. "Here, we can work in the dining room," she moved to grab her backpack from him, stepping towards the dining room.

"NO!" Byeol yelled out at the both of them, her hand flying out to stop the two of them, "Unnie, you should work in your room instead! You know I'll be watching TV and obviously, it'd be too loud for you to focus," the girl rushed out, her doe-eyes a bit too wide, her voice a little too innocent. She is definitely plotting something, Joon hwi narrowed his eyes at her but she avoided the look, choosing to jump off the couch and walk towards them instead.

Before either of them could protest, the girl pushed the both of them towards, presumably, Kang Sol's bedroom. Sol awkwardly laughed at him, Joon hwi shooting her an amused look. They awkwardly stood in her room, Joon hwi avoiding her gaze and choosing to look at the walls instead. Her room here looked similar to the one she had back on campus. Her desk was stacked to the max, sticky notes lining the walls with old reminders and little notes of encouragement. It was neat, but brightly colored, which suited Sol so very well.

“Let’s get started shall we?” Sol finally said, clearing her throat, gesturing for him to set down his books. He obliged, sitting at her desk while she chose her bed. They both set up all their materials, the awkward silence shifting into a peaceful one, the two working themselves into a comfortable rhythm.

It had been almost an hour of straight studying, both of them regurgitating criminal codes and case precedents from memory. Joon hwi was sure that by this point that his mind was complete mush, and Sol was starting to wither, her eyes almost glazed over while she started into one of her casefiles. Her hair was a lot puffier than it was when they started. Turns out, Sol had a habit of ruffling her hair with her pencil each time she was confused or working herself too hard, which was often.

“Let’s take a break shall we? I’m going to get a glass of water,” he said, standing up and stretching his arms out, trying to put the two out of their misery. He yawned, the stiffness in his muscles finally noticeable when he stretched out. She nodded back to him, yawning and stretching out in her chair, before she picked up her phone to check some messages.

He walked out of her room and back to the living room, where byeol was still glued to her seat, her eyes on the TV playing some cartoon. Heading over to the dining table, he poured himself a glass of water with the pitcher, before heading back to check on Byeol.

“What’s this show called?” he asked her, taking a sip of the water while watching the show with her.

“Hm?” Byeol turned to him, “Oh, it’s this show about two kids who set out to find a treasure mapped out by their parents,” she explained, gesturing towards him to take a seat beside him. He obliged, opting to sit beside the girl, both their eyes glued to the screen. A few moments passed by, before the little girl turned towards him.

“You know, my sister’s favorite color is dark green. Not like emerald green, but forest green tinted with some dark blue,” Byeol said nonchalantly. Joon Hwi’s eyebrows furrowed, confused as to why the girl is telling this to him. “And, her favorite ice cream is this nutella infused one that you get down the street, closer to the town square. It’s been her favorite since she was little,” she continued, not giving his confusion any heed. The girl rapidly started telling him facts about her dear sister, all the while confusion took over his features.

“Joonhwi-oppa,” she squinted at him, pausing as her face grew serious, “You like my sister, don’t you?” He sputtered, choking and coughing out the water. “I knew it!” she excitedly squealed.

“Byeol, byeol, shh, you can’t let your sister know okay,” he brought a finger to his lips, his eyes alarmed. For an 8 year old, Byeol was surprisingly cunning and observant. She had managed to figure out what he had been struggling with for the past year after just a few short visits. They shared a look of understanding between the two, before the girl turned her attention to the show, leaving Joon Hwi walking back to Sol’s room. The Kang Sisters,  he shook his head, laughing as he thought, what a perfect duo.

bonus

It had been almost 3 hours of studying together before Kang Sol realized that the sun had set outside, and all of a sudden, they were in a rush to clean up. Joon hwi had to leave before the dorms closed entrance and because of their studying, the two of them had their head buried in books since the time they got to her house.

She was glad to have him over though. Despite her hesitation at the school and fears of inconveniencing him, having Joon hwi made the process a lot smoother. With his careful and gentle help, she had a much easier time understanding the concepts and she was eternally grateful, considering Professor Yang’s exams were always some of the toughest.

They were rushing out of the house, his backpack in her hand as he hurriedly put on his shoes and stepped outside the house. But before Joon hwi could turn with a hurried goodbye, she called out to him, her breath suddenly lodged in her throat.

“Thank you,” she quietly told him, the prospect of looking into his eyes as he leaned over her doorstep daunting. “Thank you for helping me, Joon hwi, it was really kind of you,” she beamed at him, trying to convey her gratitude and more in the only way she knew possible.

They both paused, looking at each other as the air got thicker between them, as if a string was drawing him closer to her. She watched as he swallowed slightly, his adam’s apple moving slightly before he let out a soft “You’re welcome,” and a classic smile, before he rushed out, trying to catch his bus.

She sighed, watching him as he rushed off, capturing the bus. Soon, she thought, Soon, I’ll tell him how I feel. She reassured herself, turning around only to find Byeol hiding behind a pillar.

“Byeol? What are you doing, weren’t you watching a show?” she questioned her sister, but Byeol made no response. Suddenly her sister frowned at her, muttering something about how can she possibly be a lawyer and she’s so blind, leaving her in utter confusion at the front steps.

[badbhye]

feels like summer (m)

You only have one question on your mind this summer: when did Jeon Jungkook get abs?

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: neighbor au, smut, fluff, angst (if u squint)

warnings:  alcohol mention, drinking, explicit sexual content; voyeurism, masturbation, fingering, dom/sub-themes, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, oral sex (m/f receiving), throat fucking, cum play, grinding, gagging, oc has a muscle kink, jungkook’s character doing a whole 180 halfway through the plot

word count: 16.6k

A/N: This was originally written for the BSC Drabble Exchange and obviously I’m two months late...but also....this spiraled out of drabble territory so fast. But to the person who originally requested this, I hope you see it and enjoy it! Please don’t forget to send in some feedback, and I apologize for any mistakes!

"You're drooling a little there," Yoongi mumbles, nudging your arm.

"Will you shut up," you glare, trying to focus on the article you're supposed to be reviewing but it's difficult. How can you focus on Market Upheavals when Jeon Jungkook is doing pull-ups in his backyard.

You don't know how it happened but when you came back home from college one fine day, Jungkook had just changed. He wasn't just the kid who stuck to your brother like a second skin, following him around like a lost puppy anymore. He had grown up. A little too much, you think to yourself when he lifts his shirt to wipe the sweat that had collected on his forehead. You think you're mistaken, but you catch him looking right where you're sitting, and when he does, you have to hold back the jolt of shivers that threaten to go down your spine.

"Hey, hyung," he calls, waving his hand to Yoongi before making his way over the short fence. "I wanted to ask if I could go over some of my compositions with you later."

"Yeah, stop by sometime before 8, my shift starts at 11," Yoongi responds without looking up from his phone. Jungkook lets out a non-committal hum in acknowledgment before he leans over to you, invading your personal space so all you can see is his sweaty torso. Your eyes budge at the way his muscles flex and follow the way a drop of sweat trails down the side of his jaw, down to his neck. He's so close you can feel his breath on your skin, his eyes noting your reactions and you swear you see a corner of his lips twitch. "Noona," he says, voice lower than normal. Your eyes jolt to meet his own, mouth suddenly very dry.

"You're sitting on my towel," he points towards the offending cloth placed snugly between the dock chair and your thighs.

"Oh," you let out, voice uncharacteristically weak but you comply nonetheless, moving so he can slide it out from under you. He grazes the skin of your thigh lightly, and you know he's doing it on purpose. You don't know when he got so bold, last time you were home he'd barely even look at you for more than a minute before he was reduced to a blushing, stuttering mess.

But that was two summers ago and the scrawny, awkward boy you used to know is no longer there.

All too soon, he shuffles back as if the interaction never happened. You're ashamed enough to peek a glance at Yoongi, who is still focused on his phone. If he noticed anything, he's feigning ignorance which you're thankful for. When Jungkook's done obnoxiously drying off the sweat off his body, going as far as to take off his shirt completely and flinging the flimsy cloth on his shoulder as he finishes drying his hair. You're left in utter shock, shamelessly ogling his movements, especially the way his shoulder blades flex with every shift of his arms. When he bids goodbye to Yoongi with a promise to meet up later, he turns once more to catch your gaze. His expression dancing with playful mirth, "Bye, noona!" He calls, almost sweetly, and you gulp. When he's gone, you feel like you can finally breathe again, you turn towards the dreaded article you should have been done analyzing by now when you notice Yoongi's eyes on you.

"What do you want?" You say, not sparing him a glance.

"You know..." he yawns a little, almost bored. "I really didn't need to see you and Jeon eye-fucking each other like that," moving to leave his spot on the adjacent dock chair.

"I don't know what you're talking about," you try to busy yourself once again but the flush of your cheeks gives you away. Plus, it's Yoongi. You could never hide anything from him, even if you wanted to.

"Please," he rolls his eyes. "Cut the crap, you think I don't know about your little crush on him?"

You can't help but sputter at his blunt words though it shouldn't be surprising to you anymore. He doesn't wait on you to answer him before he makes his way back inside and you try to focus on your work again — the keyword being try.

 The list of work you'd made when you were feeling especially productive glares at you from your desk. Clearly, the thought of being ahead in your classes, or even catching up to your current courses was not something you'd be able to pull off this time. The reason for this belated realization: Jeon Jungkook. It wasn't as if you weren't used to him being at your house all the time, you'd practically grown up together. Well, in the neighborly sense. He never spent too much time with you, opting to accompany Yoongi instead. You always wondered whether the boy had an issue with you, maybe he just didn’t like you. It never bothered you too much, you had eventually brushed it off because you had your own thing going on. It wasn't until high school that you and Yoongi's social circles merged but Jungkook still kept his distance.

But now, it's like he's always there. Always in your field of vision. It's not like you try to seek him out (you tell yourself) but it's like he knows where you'll be. It's almost domestic seeing him help your mother bring in the groceries or mowing the yard for your father. And when you pass by him, he always makes sure to acknowledge you, and boy, do you. Ever since he's grown out of his lanky body and filled out a bit more, he's started wearing more form-fitting clothes. Like the white shirt, he's wearing right now. He's been watering the plants in his backyard and because of the heat today washed himself off too. You're conveniently sitting on your porch, laptop in tow but you're not working. How can you when you have the perfect view of how the material of his shirt sticks to his abdomen. The only question in your mind right now is when did Jungkook get abs? You haven't been away from home for that long... or maybe you just didn't notice before. Just then, he lifts his wet shirt over his head and you find it impossible that you couldn't have noticed. And you swear he maintains eye contact with you when he does it, the fucker even has the audacity to smirk.

The silent staring contest is shattered when Yoongi comes out, probably trying to sneak a smoke before your mom gets home.

"I really can't get a moment of peace, can I?" He settles against the porch railing, fishing a cigarette out of his pocket.

You and me both, you begrudgingly think but you keep that thought to yourself, forcing your eyes away from Jungkook to look at Yoongi instead.

"What's up?" You ask, concern evident in your voice. Yoongi wasn't one to complain.

He takes a long drag. "They're giving me overtime for the entire week...won't have time to compose."

You frown, Yoongi barely had any free time on his hands. He worked at the local radio station during the dead hours of the night along with helping out your mom with any housework and composing music whenever he could on top of it all. You feel terrible because you're barely home because of college and you know that's affected Yoongi. You're aware that he most likely regrets dropping out but you know it wasn't his calling. He was wasting his talents by sticking to studying business so you still support his decision. But, maybe staying home wasn't as good as you thought it would be for him. If you could take his place, you would in a heartbeat but you know he'd never let you. He was always like that.

"If you need any help..." You offer, but you know your attempt is futile, "I can take mom out for errands when I'm here."

"Do you think she'll let you drive Petunia?" He laughs, putting out the cigarette before he's even done smoking half of it.

"I'm good at driving," you defend yourself. You admit you were never the best driver but you had gotten your license fair and square.

"I'm happy you want to help," your mother says placing heaps of food onto a plate she especially prepared for Jungkook. "But I'd rather you not drive my car."

You glare at Yoongi when he laughs at your expense.

"I have a license," you remind them quickly but all it does is give a non-committal hum from your mother. It’s rather embarrassing to have your family ridicule your driving skills, especially when Jungkook’s joined you for dinner tonight.

“I’m happy to help out,” Jungkook meekly pipes in. “I drive my dad’s truck for errands all the time, so it won’t be an issue.”

“You’re such a helpful young boy, any girl would be lucky to snatch you up,” your mother coos, ruffling his hair causing him to let out a small laugh, briefly meeting your eyes before he’s too busy trying to keep your mother from adding even more food onto his plate.

The subject on your part, unfortunately, is dropped for the moment and you angrily eat the rest of your dinner.

A couple of days go by and you've forgotten about the whole thing altogether. You find yourself busy with yet another reading you had until you hear your mom come through the front door.

"Just set these here, sweetie," she motions towards the counter in the kitchen. And in tow, you see none other than Jungkook carrying three big bags of groceries with such ease. You don't know if you're jealous that he can carry that much in one go when it probably would take you two trips, but you can't lie and say you didn't just ogle at the way the muscles of his arms flex.

"So, they said the shipment of those Torx screwdrivers were coming in at 4, so they should have them by now," your mother informs him while she's unloading the fresh produce.

"Ah, I can go now then," Jungkook responds, putting the cereal away. By spending so much time here, he'd become to familiarise himself with how things were in your house. He probably had a whole system set up by the way he was moving so quickly. You manage to bring your focus back to your work successfully, although it proves to be a difficult feat. It isn't until you hear your mother call out your name that your focus breaks once more.

"___," she repeats, coming into the living room where you're seated. "I need you to go run some errands with Jungkook."

Your head whips up so fast you almost give yourself whiplash. "H-huh? Didn't you just get the groceries?"

Your mother pins you with a look that indicates not to ask questions. "You said you wanted to help out around the house."

The complaint that threatens to spill out is quickly stopped in its tracks when you see the expectant look on Jungkook's face when he peeks in from the kitchen. Your resolve is so easy to break. You huff, roughly putting away your books before you go to put on some shoes — you can't look too eager now.

It's silent in the car for a couple of minutes, but it's a long drive. Leave it to your mom to stay loyal to the hardware store that's all the way across town. It's a little awkward sitting in close quarters with Jungkook after the way you've been thinking about him these days...you almost feel guilty. So, you focus on the radio instead, listening to whatever mindless pop song that plays next. It's when Jungkook clears his throat when he's stopped at the red light, slowly lowering the volume of the radio that you're reminded of your situation. You're alone with Jungkook.

"So," he begins, eyeing you briefly, "How have you been, noona?"

You peer over at him, "Oh...um same old, I guess."

He hums, "...Are you still seeing uh, Joonho?"

"Junho," you correct him. "And no, we split after he graduated."

"Oh good," he mumbles under his breath but backtracks immediately when he realizes you heard him. "Ah, I mean I hope you're doing good after the split..."

"Nice save," you chuckle as he rubs the shell of his ears nervously. "I'm fine," you clarify, eyeing the radio. "It was a mutual decision."

When he doesn't respond, you sigh, moving to turn up the volume again so you don't have to deal with the silence. Jungkook's just doing your mom a favor anyway, it's not like he wants to be alone with you.

Soon enough, you become hyper-aware of the fact that Jungkook is in the car with you and god, why did the hardware store have to be all the way across town? You stare at him from the corner of your eye but have to stop yourself when your thoughts start going south once again.

"So," you clear your throat, talking loud enough so he can hear you over the radio. "How have you been?" You redirect his question back to him. "How's college been?"

"Oh, um," Jungkook stammers a bit as if he's embarrassed. "I'm thinking of dropping out..."

You shut the radio at that and turn to face him completely, "Why?"

He looks over to you at your bluntness. "Huh?"

"Jeon Jungkook, please don't tell me you're dropping out because Yoongi did," you accuse, sounding almost angry.

"Noona, how could you think so lowly of me?" He pouts. "It was just something I was thinking about," he admits, turning to park the car.

"This isn't something you can just do, Jungkook," you explain. "It's a big decision that has real consequences...have you talked to anyone about this?"

"No..." he mumbles, "You're the first one to know."

You sigh, putting a hand on his knee. Immediately, he stiffens under your hold so you begin to move away but he quickly takes a hold of your hand before you can. There's silence for a minute until you very awkwardly clear your throat.

"Jungkook," you begin, "Are you happy?"

"What do you mean?" His eyes widen at your very personal question.

"I mean...are you happy with what you're doing, is it your own decision or did something happen?" You switch your words around because you realize Jungkook probably wouldn't want to tell you something as personal as this.

He stays silent for a while, contemplating what to say, his eyes not leaving your hands, he intertwines his fingers with yours without thought. Your breath hitches but you don't pull away...it feels nice.

"I don't know," he admits, a little wistfully.

You frown and wait for him to continue, thumb rubbing soothing circles on his hand.

"I just think I'm doing something wrong, wasting my father's money...especially after-" he catches himself before he can tell you the extent of his problems. Clearing his throat, he looks away but doesn't let go of your hand. "It's nothing," he concludes.

"It isn't nothing," you defend him. "Jungkook, I understand if you're uncomfortable with me because we've never been close, but I want you to know that I'm here for you, okay?" You pass a reassuring smile at him. "I care about you a lot, you're like a...brother to me."

You feel gross lying to him like that but you need to put your needs aside, Jungkook's wellbeing is way more important than some sexual fantasy. But to your surprise, he doesn't respond the way you thought he would, at most you expected him to shyly laugh. Instead, his brows furrow, and he frowns. He doesn't say anything, just lets go of your hand and moves to get out of the car. You don't dwell on it too much because just then you receive a text from your mother.

 Honey, I forgot the coffee your brother likes, would you please grab it on your way back?

 "Hey, I'm going next door," you call out to Jungkook as you get out of the car. You're a little thankful that you don't have to be next to Jungkook because, right now, all you can think of the way he reacted. It was probably the most aggravated you'd seen him react in such close quarters. You quickly grab the brand of coffee Yoongi prefers and continue to browse the aisles of the store, not really paying attention to what you're looking at.

"Can't decide between boxers or briefs?" Jungkook chuckles and you flush a deep crimson.

You hadn't realized you were staring at men's underwear.

"...It's for Yoongi?" You grimace, already regretting your words as you're saying them.

Jungkook bursts into loud laughter, nose scrunching and all. You can't help but smile at that, glad that the tension has ebbed away.

"Okay, the jig is up!" You raise your hands in surrender. "...I wear men's underwear."

"That's sexy, noona," Jungkook grins leaning down so the two of you are eye to eye.

Your laugh dies in your throat because, once again, you find Jungkook in your personal space. You can't stop the way you inhale sharply, eyeing at how close his lips are to your own. He's so close, you can feel his breath on your skin, and you're sure he can feel yours on his too. It feels like forever before he moves back, but not before his own eyes fall down to your lips. The corners of his lips lightly lift in a smile smiles before he breaks the moment and walks towards the counter. You meekly follow behind, clutching the coffee tightly in your grasp, mind still reeling from what just happened.

You're dazed. The ride back doesn't even seem that long compared to the ride there. You lean back on your seat, head leaning against the window, focusing on the low hum of the music.

"You're wrong, noona," Jungkook says after a couple of silent minutes go by. You peer at him in question, silently urging him to continue.

"I'm not uncomfortable with you," he turns to look at you before eyeing the road again. You hum in acknowledgment, "That's nice to hear, Kook."

It's silent again but you hear Jungkook mumble something so softly you think you might've been mistaken.

"I care a lot about you too."

 After the whole grocery store ordeal, you notice Jungkook begins to spend a little more time with you. He still retreats to Yoongi like before, but it's still progress in your books.

You're lounging around when Jungkook comes by and takes a seat close to you, he doesn't say anything but smiles in lieu of a greeting.

"What's up?" You ask, eyes not leaving your phone. Not that you're doing much on it anyway, you'd just gotten done feeding your virtual cats. "If you're waiting on Yoongi, he's out...probably with Namjoon," you continue.

"I wanted to spend time with you," Jungkook admits, a shy smile playing on his lips.

That's one thing you appreciate, as much as Jungkook has weakened your resolve a significant amount, there are still moments where you see the same lanky, shy boy you admire so much. Or maybe you just like to see him squirm.

"Sure, what do you wanna do?" You look away from your phone to smile at him. The two of you had hung out a handful of times after the car ride, and it ended up being quite nice. You realized that you two had a lot more in common than you originally thought.

"It's nice out today so why don't we go out for a walk?" He suggests.

"You trying to get me to exercise more, Jeon?" You tease, peering out the window to assess the damage you'll be suspecting yourself to.

“Come on, noona, you've been cooped up in here ever since you've come home,” Jungkook whines, poking at your side. “You're getting lazy.”

“Hey, I am not cooped up in here, and this is my vacation, I deserve to be lazy,” you playfully glare from your spot on the couch, laying back further so your legs are spread on his thighs.

He laughs but doesn't make you move your legs off him. Instead, he places his hands on your knees and slowly begins to massage them. You try to feign ignorance to his touch, to keep your eyes glued to anything but him or his hands but it becomes so difficult when one of his hands moves up to your thighs, fingers putting light pressure on the muscle as they slowly begin trailing up your legs.

You don't move, eyes transfixed to the way his fingers ghost the skin of your thighs, leaving goosebumps in their wake. Even though you try to act like his touch doesn't affect you, your body immediately betrays you when a shudder wracks through you. And you swear you see the corners of Jungkook's mouth lift a little before you awkwardly cough, disrupting the moment.

"The only way you'll have me outside is if you carry me the whole way," you decide.

"I'll happily carry you, noona!" Jungkook laughs, grabbing your hand to pull you up. You greatly misjudge his strength and in a blink of an eye, he has you sitting up and trapped in his grasp. Your eyes widen in shock at your sudden close proximity and you nervously clear your throat before scampering to your feet.

"Let's go then," you briskly walk towards the entrance to put on your shoes.

 Once you're standing on the street you grew up in, you turn back to Jungkook who had wordlessly followed your lead. "So, where are you taking me?"

Jungkook laughs nervously before taking ahold of your hand and dragging you towards the park at the end of the street.

"Are you seriously taking me to the park," you laugh as you let him drag you. His pace is faster than yours so you have to move quickly to keep up with his long legs.

"Jungkook! Hold on," you pant, pulling at his wrist to make him stop in his tracks. He looks back and flushes. “Sorry noona,” he responds, slowing his pace to walk in sync next to you but not letting go of your hand.

It’s when you reach the middle of the park that you let go and take a seat on one of the swings.

“God, I haven’t been here in so long,” you say, sitting limply on the swing.

“You haven’t been back in so long,” Jungkook says, taking a seat on the swing next to yours.

“Okay, that’s fair,” you quip, giving him a side-eye before smiling. “I had different plans for the future back then.”

“With Junho?” Jungkook asks, a little cautious when you don’t respond immediately.

“...Yeah,” you say, kicking your legs so you start swinging slowly.

“What happened between the two of you?” He asks, “I mean, you don’t have to tell me unless you want to,” he stammers, backpedaling a little.

“It’s okay, Kook,” you reassure him. “We just grew apart. Fell out of love, I guess,” you try to explain. “It was a good relationship but we were in different places in our lives, so we decided to break up. Simple,” you shrug.

“What about you, though,” you peer over to him. “You got stuff out of me, it’s your turn now.”

“That’s fair,” he chuckles, kicking his legs so he’s swinging too. “What do you want to know?”

“Why are you considering dropping out?” You turn to face him once the swing stops.

“Wow… you’re blunt, noona.”

“I don’t beat around the bush,” you sniff and wait for him to continue.

Jungkook chuckles, ruffling his hair, “I think I’m gonna end up being a disappointment.”

“Jungkook…” you begin, actually surprised to hear those words from him. “I don’t think you can be more wrong, you know Yoongi’s been telling me just how talented you are for years. He barely calls or texts when I’m not home and when he does, it’s always to tell me how proud he is of you.”

He’s silent for a while, letting the swing stop on its own before he looks up at you again. “Have you heard any of it?”

“I haven’t,” you respond, moving to get off the swing. “Come on, there’s a place I want to go to.”

You two walk towards the trees that line one side of the park, leading to a clearing surrounded by a thicker layer of foliage. It’s a comfortable sort of silence that sits between you as you make your way through the path. When you reach the familiar tree, you smile, moving to sit where you used to spend most of your evenings as a child, Jungkook gingerly taking a seat next to you.

“You remember this place,” he says after a few moments.

“Uh, this is my spot,” you clarify, pointing towards the tree bark where fourteen year old you had carved out your initials.

“Sorry to say, noona, but you’ve been gone too long,” Jungkook sniffs, motioning towards another carving on the tree trunk. You follow his movements and see another dull indentation of the initials “JK”, not far from your own.

“Jungkook, how could you!” You say trying to sound angry, even though the telltale signs of a smile started ghosting your lips. “How dare you not follow the sacred rules of finders keepers losers weepers!”

Jungkook laughs, shrugging. “It’s free real estate, plus I hung out here just as often as you did.”

“Oh yeah, this is where you’d follow me to and then ignore me all day,” you laugh, remembering all the times you’d sit by the tree to read whatever trashy romance novel you’d stolen from your friend’s mom’s closet and he’d come by, sitting on the opposite end, doing whatever he always did. You’d barely talk, you’d sometimes offer him a juice box and he’d sometimes place a peanut butter sandwich next to you before scurrying off. The both of you chuckle together, reminding each other of memories you’d shared there until you fall into another comfortable silence.

 “I want to, by the way,” you say, when the sun starts to set, painting the sky in shades of orange and pink. “Listen to your music,” you clarify when he raises a brow in question. “I know it’s a very personal thing to ask for, and even Yoongi barely lets me listen to his pieces, but I’d like to,” you smile, resting your hand on the plush grass, watching the way your fingers are swallowed by the long blades. “If you’d let me.”

Jungkook smiles, cheeks dusting a light pink before he places his hand on yours. “I’d like that.”

It's dark out by the time you get home but it feels like barely any time had passed. You're fairly certain that nobody's home but that doesn't stop you from calling out when you slip off your shoes.

"In here," you hear Yoongi's voice from the living room.

"Don't you have work tonight?" You ask when you spot him lounging on the sofa. You stop in your tracks when you notice Hoseok's presence.

"When did you get here?" You gush, running to crush him in a hug.

"Picked him up an hour ago," Yoongi responds before Hoseok can answer you, though you doubt he'd be able to because you still have him tight in your grasp.

"If you missed me this much, babe, why don't we take this to the bedroom?" Hoseok chuckles, swiftly dodging the pillow Yoongi throws his way. You laugh, used to Hoseok's incessant flirting, almost missing it.

"Why don't you take me right here, right now," you challenge, taking a seat.

"God, if you guys were gonna be fucking gross, I wouldn't have brought him here," Yoongi groans, grimacing at your shameless flirting.

"It's been a while, hyung," another voice calls, and that's when you remember Jungkook was here too. He's still standing in the doorway, face impassive, a clear contrast to how he was smiling at you just moments ago.

"Jungkook! How've you been?" Hoseok goes to give him a hug, you don't miss the way Jungkook's eyes meet yours in their embrace.

Hoseok promptly takes a seat next to you, grabbing your ankles so your legs rest over his lap.

"How long are you here for, Hobi?" You stretch your legs a little more.

"Hmm, probably for two weeks? I'm giving a class in the studio, also have to visit my sister."

"Oh, is Jiwoo still married?"

"Thankfully," he huffs, "Otherwise she'd be stuck up my ass all the time."

"That's a shame," you hum, "Let her know whenever she's ready to leave that husband of hers, I'll be waiting."

"So, you're gonna cheat on me...with my own sister?" He jokingly accuses, already closing the distance between the two of you.

“How else will I bring drama into my life?” You justify as he pulls you closer to grab hold of your waist and begin his attack.

Your cries are violent as you immediately thrash in his hold, tears streaming down your face as you can't hold back your laughter. In the midst of all the chaos, nobody notices Jungkook leave.

  A couple of days go by and you don't see Jungkook as often anymore. Sure, you catch him doing some chores here and there but it's not the same. Shockingly, you've been significantly more productive these days with most of the list crossed out already. So, there's not much left to do. So you decide to do the first thing that comes to mind — barge into Yoongi's room. Surprisingly, he's awake and flinches when he hears the door burst open. You ignore his curses and ungracefully flop down on his bed.

"What do you want?" He sneers from his place on the desk, headphones propped away from his ears so he can hear you.

"I'm bored," you sniff, turning to face him.

"The fuck should I do then?"

"When did you get so boring?" You whine. "Let's get drunk or something...since Hoseok's here too," you reason.

"Yeah, we could..." he says, eyes going back to his laptop screen. "But I think I've seen you and Jung hook up enough to last me a lifetime."

"You know he'd blow you before he'd as much as kiss me," you challenge, laughing when he bristles at your words.

"Get the fuck out of my room!"

You easily dodge the balls of dirty socks he flings your way, laughing as you make your way out of his room.

It's a pleasant night and you find yourself sitting in your backyard once again, drinking wine you swiped from your mother's stash. It's quiet, and you're humming to yourself, enjoying the buzz of alcohol in your veins. That's when you see Jungkook in his own backyard and you wave him over, showcasing the bottle of wine as temptingly as you can.

"You know I got that for your mom," Jungkook takes a seat next to you, but still takes the bottle from you.

"Are you trying to woo my mother?" You raise an eyebrow, trying to bite back a smile.

"I plan on becoming your second dad by the end of the year," he takes a swig, grimacing at the bitter taste.

"Well, I'd suggest you get Pinot Noir and I guarantee you'll have her by the end of the month," you wink, taking the bottle back.

He laughs and the two of you settle into a comfortable silence, passing the bottle back and forth until it's half empty. The headiness of the wine finally gets to you and you begin to sway a little.

"Where were you?" You ask rather bluntly.

"I was here," he responds, confused at your sudden question.

"No," you sigh, pushing the stray hair out of your face. "I mean...were you avoiding me or something?"

"N-no," he stammers, rubbing the back of his neck. "...Okay, maybe a little."

You scoff, appalled at his answer. "You know you could have just lied so I wouldn't feel bad," You sniff, turning away from him. "What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything, I just..." he clears his throat, and it feels like you're back at square one when he couldn't hold a conversation with you for the life of him. "I just needed some time."

"Oh," you respond, taking his words a little differently. "I get it, Kook, everyone needs time."

"Noona, I don't think you do," he sighs, not looking at you. "I've actually been meaning to talk to you for a while...I just-" He pauses when you put a reassuring hand on his knee, you would've aimed for his shoulder but you're practically slumped in your chair. He pauses, staring at your hand for a moment before he threads his fingers with yours, soothingly rubbing patterns on the back of your palm. You take the time to look at his face then, the way his hair bounces over his eyes, you can't help but follow the slope of his nose and direct your attention to his lips. You must be blatantly staring because he notices when you begin to sit up straight. You can't help yourself when your drunken mind can only focus on how beautiful he looks in the moonlight. His eyes also soften looking at you and you swear you catch his gaze drop to your lips.

"Noona," he whispers, "I-"

You swear he's moving closer and you can't help but lean in until you're only inches apart. Your breath hitches. "Yeah?" you ask, peering up at him. He gulps at your sudden close proximity, his eyes falling down to your lips before he catches your gaze once again.

"Noona, I-" He begins again but he's cut off by your blaring ringtone which somehow is still Apple Bottom Jeans like it's been for the past eight years. You almost fall back trying to answer the call, cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

"H-Hoseok!" you shout. "Shit, I was gonna call you later, wait, Jungkook's here too let me put you on speaker!"

"Kook! Where've you been?" Hoseok's voice drifts over, a little static from the signal.

"Ah, just busy, hyung," Jungkook meekly replies.

"Don't work yourself too hard, kid," Hoseok chuckles, "Enjoy your youth!"

"Stop talking like you're an old man, it makes me feel old," you tease, "Jungkook's a good kid so the last thing he needs is you to influence him." You reach out to ruffle Jungkook's hair affectionately but he doesn't return your affection with a smile as you expected, instead, you see his jaw clench before he lets go of your hand.

"Oh, so you think I'm a bad influence?" Hoseok asks, trying to sound appalled. "When you sound drunk, ___, did you give the kid alcohol?"

"No," you hiccup. "Technically he gave it to my mom and I stole it from her!"

"Who's really the bad influence then, babe," Hoseok laughs.

You lean back in your chair, drunkenly laughing.

“But listen,” Hoseok continues once you've calmed down. “I’m calling because I heard someone can't get enough alcohol in her system.”

“So drinking my problems away is wrong when I do it?”

“Aw, you can drink as much as you want, babe,” Hoseok chuckles. “Namjoon and I are throwing a party at your request.”

“Wait,” you jolt up. “You got Namjoon to agree? Mr. I have a 9 to 5 job and too many Bonsai tree children to feed.”

“Well...it’s more of a hangout,” his voice changing in pitch at the last word. “But I’m sure I can pull some strings for you...I can do anything for you, babe,” Hoseok adds, still laughing at your Namjoon impression

“Mm, that sounds hot Jung,” you coolly respond, moving to take another swig of wine but you can't find the bottle. When you turn to ask Jungkook, you see him taking a long swig, finishing off the remaining wine.

“Jungkook that doesn’t come cheap, you know?” You berate, frowning at the lack of wine in the bottle.

“I know,” he huffs, leaning back on the dock chair. “I am the one who bought it."

"Will I be expecting to see you there, kid?" Hoseok's voice calls out. "Because it seems like you need a drink too."

"Yeah, sure," Jungkook responds. "See you later, hyung, I'm heading out."

"Wait, Jungkook," you call out with a playful lilt to your tone. "You're leaving after you buy a girl a drink? That's not how it goes!"

To your dismay, Jungkook doesn't turn back or even acknowledge you as he walks back to his side of the fence.

"Don't tease him, ___," you hear Hoseok's laugh from the static of your phone, making you flinch at your forgotten company.

"So it's okay when you do it but not when I do it?" You repeat your earlier words. "You know what they call that, Jung? Sexism."

"No, you dumbass," Hoseok groans. "I mean don't lead him on."

"Wait what?" You sputter. "How are you calling me a dumbass when you're the one saying something like that!"

"Come on, ___," Hoseok sighs. "The kid literally wears his heart on his sleeve, it's harder not to notice."

"Why do I feel too drunk for this but also in need of a drink after hearing this," you groan, leaning back. "Don't play tricks on a woman when she's drunk, Hoseok. You should know this."

"That's called alcoholism," Hoseok easily responds. "And ___, trust me, everyone can see it. But I guess you're just not ready to have that conversation."

You're at a loss for words after hearing that. What the fuck? You're brought out of your panicked thoughts when your phone vibrates in your hand, only then realizing that Hoseok had hung up on you.

"That damn Aquarius," you mumble to yourself as you scroll through your phone to check the aforementioned text message.

 Hoseok [23:18]: Everyone can see you too, but you aren't ready for that conversation either.

“___,” you hear your mother call. “Can you give this to Jungkook before he leaves?”

"He's here?" You peer over your mother's shoulder as she packs dinner for him inside some tupperware. "I haven't seen him around."

"Oh he mentioned coming by to see Yoongi, as usual, he should be in his room I suppose," she hands you the box before making her way out of the kitchen. "And remind Yoongi to eat something, he's been cooped up in his room all day!"

You begrudgingly make your way to Yoongi's bedroom, knowing well that he dislikes it when you barge in when he's working so you decide to do the decent thing, and barge in.

"What the fuck do you want now?" He seethes, whipping his head around to glare at you. You mindlessly peer around his room and huff. "Jungkook's not here?"

"No," Yoongi says, turning back to face the glowing screen of his computer once more. "He didn't show today."

"Huh," you hum. "Well, don't rot away in front of your computer screen, take a shower," you scrunch your nose in disgust. "And eat something so you don't die before you get to drunkenly make out with Hoseok."

You're quick to make your exit before you can hear Yoongi's retort. You end up busying yourself in your room for the next couple of hours, humming the tune you've heard come out of Yoongi's room for the past two days as you work, happy that you're actually getting something done for a change. It's when you lean back to stretch your stiff back that you realize that the sun is close to setting.

"So you showered," you grin at Yoongi when you enter the kitchen. Leaning down next to him, you steal some food off his plate. He passes you a glare before shoveling more into his mouth. "Jungkook still not here?" You ask, looking for the tupperware your mom had given you earlier.

It's Yoongi's turn to smirk now. "Why do you care so much?"

You snort at his words, "I'm just asking because mom told me to give him some dinner. Guess I'll have to go next door."

"Yeah the only dinner you'll be serving him is your —"

You've shut the door before Yoongi can finish that sentence, grateful that he doesn't get to see the growing blush on your cheeks.

You peer over to Jungkook's backyard, hoping to see him outside but it's empty. Huffing about the fact that you'll have to go to his house, the conversation you had with Hoseok still running in the back of your mind.

Shaking yourself out of it, you trudge your way across the fence but you once again find yourself nervous. Nervous that you're going to be seeing him.

You hadn't seen Jungkook much after the night you'd gotten drunk together. You'd think he was purposefully avoiding you, but you also know that he'd been helping his father with work for the past few days and had seen him through the window once or twice. Other than that, you'd had no contact with him.

You frown, standing outside the back entrance of the house, unsure of what you should do.

Confused about whether you should go to the front door and ring the doorbell or just go through the backdoor, leave the food in the kitchen and make a prompt exit. You snort, what the hell were you doing? This nervousness was so unlike you, you're always the one with the upper hand, you're an adult for god's sake, and you're far above this coy behavior. With a sudden burst of confidence, you push back your doubts and quickly find yourself inside the kitchen. Peering around, you don't spot Jungkook anywhere, not even his parents but that's not out of the ordinary, they're usually not home around this time anyway. You decide to leave the food out in the living room instead, where he'll spot it quicker. Deciding to send a quick text letting him know that you stopped by, you're about to leave until you're stopped in your tracks.

It's a dull thump that causes you to pause, making you peer in the direction of the noise in confusion. It's repetitive, coming from down the hall. Jungkook's probably working out, you think to yourself. His muscles didn't just pop out of nowhere after all. Deciding to walk further, you're met with a sliver of light falling on the floor, faintly lighting up the otherwise dark hallway.

 That's when you hear it.

 You're far too close when you realize — you would have never come if you had known (you tell yourself). Though you don't stop walking until you see the girl who's caught your attention. Her wails much clearer now that you're closer. "F-fuuuck, Jungkook," she cries, voice breaking at every syllable.

Jungkook is towering over her form, legs propped on his shoulder as he pushes into her. His occasional grunts taking away your focus, his voice reverberating through the walls and sending shivers down your spine. It takes all of your strength to keep standing at the scene, your mind screaming at you to make a move, to leave but your body stays rooted in place, taking in every detail of the scene in front of you. You're too shocked to take a breath as you see the way his muscles flex at every movement he makes, the way he so easily contorts the girl's body, drilling into her as she shrieks in pleasure. Soon enough, he has her flipped over on all fours with great ease, her head pushing down into the mattress. Your eyes barely rest on her until your eyes find their way back to him. A wrack of shivers goes down your spine once again when you notice the way begins plowing into her, with even more vigor than before. The way his jaw is clenched, letting out a grunt every time his cock is deeply lodged into her. Your eyes follow the sweat dripping down his forehead, down to his neck, following down until you see the ridges of his built form. When you look up to him again, it takes all your power not to fall down to your knees when you realize that he's looking right at you.

You gasp when he pushes her head further down into the mattress, her moans now muffled by the linen underneath. His grunts are the only thing you can hear now, sounding deep and guttural every time he pushes back in. His pace is faster, stronger and it feels like you can feel the way his cock pushes in. The way he's looking at you, it's like he's fucking you and not the girl who's currently blubbering underneath him.

Your thighs rub together at the sudden need for friction. Jungkook's eyes follow your movements, a smirk filling his features. "You like the way I'm fucking you?" He asks through clenched teeth, pushing into the hilt and pressing his pelvis into the back of her thighs.

"Mmf, yes," the girl grits out. "I love the way your cock is fucking me!"

Although she's the one answering him, you know the question was directed to you as his eyes haven't left you yet, even for a second. His hum of approval has your knees shaking and you swear your panties are sticking to you uncomfortably. You're shocked you haven't made a sound even though your breathing is labored, heart-rate accelerated. You must have gone completely insane to still be standing here when you know Jungkook is aware of your presence.

"Jungkook!" The girl cries, her legs shaking. "I'm gonna cum!"

"Come on, baby girl," Jungkook grunts, pushing into her even further. "Cum all over my cock."

It's like you're in a trance, following the way he moves his hands between her legs, making her cries get louder and shakier. At this point, its Jungkook holding the poor girl up as he drills into her. Her moans increase in pitch and it would honestly bother you but you're far too distracted looking at Jungkook that you don't even notice her cum. It's only when his own hips stutter and his head falls back that you get ahold of yourself.

As quietly as you can, with shaky knees, you make it out of his house and back to your room. Your heart hammering in your chest because you just saw Jungkook fuck the life out of some girl. Oh my god, you just saw Jungkook fuck the life out of some girl! Jungkook, your neighbour, the kid who idolizes your brother. Jungkook, who was always too shy to talk to you, who'd always get red-faced when you were around. Jungkook, who works out in his backyard. Jungkook, who sometimes holds your hand. Jungkook, who apparently can fuck the soul out of you. You shudder at that thought, your mind reeling from what you just witnessed, the wetness between your thighs still evident. You shake yourself away from wandering thoughts, you can't, you chastise yourself as you bury your face into your pillow. But the image of him doesn't stray from your mind and you feel like your body is working on overdrive, your nerves so sensitive that you can't help but shakily place a hand between your thighs.

"Yoongi's been complaining that you've been inside more than usual," Hoseok takes a seat next to you when you find yourself lounging around your house yet again.

"I've been busy," you quip, eyes not leaving the textbook in your lap.

"Come on!" Hoseok laughs, "Your lack of flirting is worrying, what's up?"

At your non-committal hum of acknowledgment, he yanks the textbook, prying it away from your grabby hands.

"If it takes me longer to graduate, it's going to be your fault, Hoseok," you groan, folding your arms across your chest after a feeble attempt to get your book back.

"___, why are you studying when you're on vacation," he raises an eyebrow. "More importantly, when I'm here?"

"Clearly, you've mistaken me for someone who gives a shit about you, Jung," you retort, "I've been using you to get to your sister this whole time."

Hoseok scoffs at your refusal to comply before bringing a backpack to his lap. That piques your interest as you raise your eyebrow expectantly.

"What's in there?"

"I was going to give this to you as a peace offering, but you're being a little bitch," Hoseok sniffs, taking out a bottle of vodka from the bag.

"I think you're the one pushing me towards alcoholism, Jung," you snort but pause when he takes out a carton of cranberry juice.

"Don't act like you're not the one who got us all booze with your fake ID in high school," he laughs, raising the bottle in his hand. "So let's commemorate and drink cranberry vodka like a bunch of freshmen."

You stare him down for a while before a smile slowly creeps up on your lips.

"God, I really need to stop using alcohol as a crutch," you grin before taking the bottle from his hand.

It's after you've drunk almost half the bottle between the two of you that Yoongi comes home, groaning as he takes off his shoes to announce his arrival.

"Get in here, you toad," you drunkenly giggle, almost sliding off your couch in between. "I have two surprises for you!"

Yoongi slowly makes his way into the living room, a scowl on his face at your obvious inebriated state.

"I'm here. Now give me a drink," he says, making you move so he can wedge himself between you and Hoseok.

"Surprise number one!" You say, handing him a haphazard mixture of vodka and cranberry juice. "And surprise number two!" You shove him lightly so he's even closer to Hoseok. You giggle as he nudges you with his elbow.

"Hoseok's helping me drink my problems away," you say, moving to the adjacent couch when Yoongi won't let you drape your legs across his.

"What problems, noona?" You hear from the doorway and immediately stiffen.

 There is none other than Jungkook, standing at the entrance, innocently smiling at you before he makes his way into the living room.

"Oh yeah, Jungkook's here too," Yoongi says, sipping on his drink and grimacing before shooting you a nasty glare for not putting in enough juice.

"I hope you guys don't mind," Jungkook says before sitting on the couch you're on, a little too close for comfort.

"What were you guys doing?" Hoseok asks, taking Jungkook's attention away from you.

"Yoongi hyung was treating me to dinner for finishing a song," Jungkook says, showcasing his teeth while smiling.

At that moment, you decide that Jungkook is the devil incarnate. He has the audacity to look like the sweet, innocent, helpful Jungkook you've known your whole life. But you know the truth, you know how he is anything but that. You can see through his facade easily, how he has everyone fooled.

He shifts in his spot, causing him to bump his thigh with yours and you immediately clamp your legs shut and move away from him, leaning as close to the corner of the sofa as you can get. You hear him huff but he maintains his distance. Even though there’s about a person’s gap between the two of you, you can still feel the heat radiating from his body.

"You know glaring at your empty cup won't put more alcohol in it," Yoongi says, finishing his own drink before moving to make himself another.

"Uh, yeah," you say, distracted still as you pour a hefty amount of vodka in your cup.

"Slow down, babe," Hoseok snorts at your antics. "What's got your panties in a twist."

"Please don't talk about my sister's panties when I'm here," Yoongi groans.

"He means don't talk about my panties when you can talk about his panties," you smirk, settling back down on the sofa.

"What if I want to talk about your panties, ___?" Comes Jungkook's whispered voice next to you, his breath hitting your neck and you almost choke on your drink, coughing loudly.

"Are you okay, noona?" Jugkook asks, loud enough for everyone to hear this time. "Here, drink some water."

You begrudgingly accept the offered cup and gulp it down so you don't have to look at his face and just recall the way he was looking at you the other night.

"Look at Jungkookie taking care of his noona!" Hoseok drunkenly giggles, slapping Yoongi's arm to get his attention. Hoseok's intentions are as clear as day and you're not amused. You feel even more on edge now, knowing that even Yoongi was in on it — if the smirk on his face was anything to go by.

You hear Jungkook laugh beside you and put an arm around your waist. You jolt up at the contact, feeling extremely sober suddenly.

"Uh...I'm going to the kitchen. Bye," you stammer and run towards your safe haven.

He's the devil, you can't believe you hadn't noticed it before.

"It really is all men," you mutter to yourself, pacing in the kitchen.

"I take it either you and Jungkook finally fucked or that you and Yoongi are fighting...which isn't new or exciting so please tell me you and Jungkook finally fucked," Hoseok says casually as he leans onto the kitchen island.

"No we did not...and will you keep your voice down?" You whisper-shout, peeking into the living room to make sure nobody heard him.

"Then why are you here talking to yourself like a madwoman, are you trying to prove that there are ghosts in this house again because that's not funny and I will scream."

"God, I wish my ghost boyfriend was still here...I miss Taemin," you groan, taking Hoseok's cup and downing it in one go. "He wouldn't torture me like this...why did he have to cross over?"

"You really need to get laid," Hoseok dryly comments. "Especially if you're pining over a clearly non-existent boyfriend."

"Oh my god, Hoseok!" You say, eyes wide as you quickly turn to face him. He flinches ready to get hit with the plastic cup in your hand but instead, you grab both of his shoulders and pull him closer.

"You're right! I do need to get laid...that explains everything," you let go of him and start pacing again. "But the question now is...who?"

"That's easy-"

"Don't you fucking dare, Jung Hoseok," you interrupt, pointing an accusatory finger at him. "Don't even try."

"I'm just stating the viable options here."

"I would take this from you any other day, but right now, I need you to help me set up a dick appointment."

"God, we're both not drunk enough for this conversation...and I'm pretty sure I'm seeing double right now," Hoseok slurs a little to accentuate his drunken state.

"It can't be you...because Yoongi would annihilate me," you begin to mutter your thoughts out loud, "Obviously Jungkook is a no go, that's just my sex-deprived brain malfunctioning."

"So you admit it!" Hoseok excitedly shouts, pointing at you with his eyes wide.

"No, shut up!" You gape, pausing in your tracks.

"Something happened, you don't do that weird saying your thoughts out loud thing unless something happened," Hoseok grins. "And don't think I didn't hear that little panties comment he made."

Fuck, it really be your own that betray you, and for you, it's your stupid inebriated self.

"Okay, if I tell you what happened," you begin, inching closer to him. "You have to promise not to laugh at me."

"You know I'm a whore for gossip," he smiles, leaning back to the counter.

"Okay..." You begin, nervously peering at the entrance to make sure that you're both alone. "I may have seen..." You purposefully keep your voice as low as a whisper, as a further precaution. "Jungkook...fucking a girl... and I can't stop thinking about it Hoseok, so you understand the severity of the situation."

He stares at you blankly as his drunken mind processes what you had said to him before, his eyes comically wide, and he barks out a loud laugh.

"Hoseok you promised you wouldn't laugh!" You sniff, looking at him with pleading eyes in hopes that he'll take pity on you.

 He doesn't.

 "Okay, you can't tell me something like that and not give me details... How much did you see? Did you see his dick? What's he like in bed?"

Hoseok's busy listing out detailing questions but you can't hear him anymore as your cheeks heat up at a significant pace when your mind starts to wander...

"Oh my god!" Hoseok balks at you. "You saw all of it didn't you!"

You don't respond, only gulp nervously when your mouth gets too dry.

"Shit, ___, not gonna lie... That's so hot." You see his eyes beginning to crinkle and scamper to shut him up before the man in question hears that you're currently talking about him getting his dick wet in front of you.

 Unfortunately, luck hasn't been on your side for the past couple of days.

"What's hot?" Jungkook says as he peeks his head in the entrance before making his way to where you are awkwardly holding onto Hoseok.

"Kim Taehyung!" You shout the name abruptly before you can even think of an excuse.

"Huh?" Jungkook tilts his head and you have to inhale deeply at the way his hair flops with his movement. Demon, you remind yourself.

"I invited Taehyung to the party this weekend, ___ thinks he's hot," Hoseok winks at you before looking back at Jungkook.

You look between the two of them before quickly stammering, "Uh, yeah! He's really hot... totally fuckable!"

Jungkook looks at you, his face blank before he hums. "I see," he says, before turning to Hoseok. "Yoongi hyung was calling you."

Hoseok passes you an apologetic look before grinning wildly and making his exit — effectively leaving you alone with Jungkook. Fucking Aquarius bastard.

 You awkwardly clear your throat when you notice Jungkook silently looking at you.

"So, Kim Taehyung?" He asks, slowly stepping closer to you.

"Yeah," you stutter, "...Kim Taehyung," backing away from him until the back of your legs hit the counter.

"What about him?" He smirks, eyeing you down and you have to peer up at him to maintain eye contact. Fuck when did he get so tall?

"You know..." you begin, "he's a good looking guy...what can a girl do?" You grimace at your words as they leave your lips but Jungkook doesn't react, just keeps his lazy smirk.

"Hmm… what can a girl do?" He grins, leaning down so he's face to face with you, his breath hitting your face. Your eyes widen before they fall to his lips and your mouth goes dry. You subconsciously lick your lips and his own eyes follow your movements before he moves towards the left to grab a spare mug that was sitting behind you on the counter.

He doesn't wait for your response before he's making his way out of the kitchen and back to the living room to Yoongi and Hoseok... and alcohol. God, you need more alcohol but you really can't make yourself sit in his presence anymore.

"Fuck Jungkook," you angrily mutter as you make your way back to your bedroom before groaning at the choice of words. You slam the door in the midst of your frustrations before launching yourself on the bed.

"I can't believe booze has failed me," you mumble into your pillow before falling into an alcohol-induced sleep.

"You can cancel your party," you say over the phone, in lieu of a greeting right as Hoseok picks up. "I'm quitting alcohol."

"I'm guessing you didn't hydrate last night," Hoseok responds, sounding much better than you.

"I couldn't and you know it!" You seethe, soothing your aching head after downing two pills of aspirin. "Anyway, how do you sound okay, I'm sure you drank way more than me."

"I may or may not have puked my guts out an hour after you left," Hoseok admits, sounding a little ashamed.

"It's what you deserve," you remark blandly, making your way out to the backyard where the warm sun welcomed you. You groan in appreciation of the warm dock chair as you get comfortable. It's only when you open your eyes again, you see Jungkook working out in his backyard once again.

"If there's a god," you mutter to yourself, "When will you let me catch a break?"

"What's up?" you hear Hoseok ask over some crackling, probably making himself breakfast.

"The bane of my existence this summer..." you whisper just in case Jungkook doesn't over-hear even though he's clearly out of earshot — but you can never be too cautious.

"Our little Jungkookie's working out isn't he," Hoseok snickers, "Why don't you just sit back and enjoy the show?"

You hum, "You know what, Hoseok?" you say thoughtfully. "Maybe you're right... maybe I can get some sort of sexual gratification by just staring at him... doing those pull-ups... and then I'll get it out of my system" You silently watch the way his muscles flex every time he does one, getting a full view of those godly pectoral muscles because he decided to forgo a shirt today.

"Clearly, it’s working," Hoseok snorts.

You groan loudly, "It's not fair Hoseok! When did he get the upper hand, how did I let this happen?"

"Come on, ___, you seriously thought Jungkook was gonna stay coy this whole time? The kid's got game, you'd know if you’d come home more often."

"Don't say that! Don't call him a kid when I saw what I saw!" You angrily whisper into the phone.

"Don't act like you didn't enjoy the show." You can practically hear the god-awful smirk accompanying Hoseok's tone.

"This is why men don't deserve rights," you mutter, still angrily staring at Jungkook finishing up his work-out. "Anyway," you sniff, "you owe me a favor."

"And what is that?" He chuckles.

"Call Taehyung to the party for me."

"Oh? So now you're coming to the party?" Hoseok asks. "I thought you swore off alcohol...well you lasted ten minutes, I'm proud of you."

"Just invite him, will you?"

 You’ve managed to successfully avoid Jungkook, occasionally seeing him around the house but your plan was foolproof: flee. But it’s the day of the party and your otherwise foolproof plan is going to fail, because he’ll be there, and you’ll be there, in the same space.

Hoseok [9:45]: I won’t let u in unless u have at least one bottle of booze with u.

Hoseok [9:57]: That was Namjoon but yeah, the rule still stands.

 “I thought this party was for me,” you mutter to yourself as you make your way up the stairs, pulling on your dress nervously after every couple of steps.

You pause when you reach the apartment, a dull throb of music cascading through the walls, staying still for a while before kicking the door once to announce your arrival.

A few seconds go by and you’re ready to kick again but the door swings open to a clearly drunk Namjoon, cradling a bonsai tree close to his chest.

“___!” He grins, pulling you into a tight hug but he misjudges and proceeds to stuff your face in his pit. You awkwardly stand in his grip, letting him hug it out because it’s been a while since you’ve seen him

“Thank god you shower regularly,” you grin at him when he lets you go. “I come bearing gifts,” you hold up the lone bottle in your hand. “So, please put my coat in Hoseok’s room for me.”

“Tequila...” Hoseok slithers his way in at the mention of alcohol. “Someone’s here to make regrets!”

“It’s silver so you better have lemons in your kitchen,” you push past him and are met with enough people to be considered a party and not the hang-out Namjoon had planned.

“So I take it your persuasion worked,” you look at Hoseok as you make your way into the kitchen.

“I told you I’d do anything for you, babe, do I ever disappoint?”

“Okay, get off your high horse,” you jab, rolling your eyes. “Alcohol please,” you cup your palms in front of your chest.

“___,” Hoseok rolls his eyes. “It’s like one foot away from you. Make your own drink.”

“I don’t have my research on me right now but I have proven that your drinks get me drunk faster,” you sniff. “So, alcohol please.”

 Once you’ve downed two shots of tequila and now nurse once of Hoseok’s special drinks, you happily stroll to the living room where you’re met with Yoongi and Namjoon, bonsai plant still in hand.

“What is he doing?” You ask Yoongi in lieu of a greeting as you wedge your way between the two of them on the sofa.

“I’m cradling my daughter,” Namjoon sniffs, gripping the plant closer to his chest. “She can’t fall asleep otherwise.”

You pass Yoongi a look who just shrugs. “I think you have more pressing matters at hand, ___,” he says cocking his head to the side. You follow his line of sight and curse under your breath.

 Lo and behold, Jungkook is already there, surrounded by a bunch of people you recognize as his friends, not like you could recognise anyone besides Park Jimin...and the girl you saw him fucking who is busy clinging onto his arm and laughing at something he just said.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you say taking a large gulp of your drink. “Anyway, is Taehyung here?”

“Oh god,” Yoongi groans. “Don’t tell me you got Namjoon to agree to a party just so you could schedule a booty call with Taehyung, you know you could just text him instead of orchestrating a giant ruse.”

“Hey, this ruse is for you and Hoseok to get down and dirty too, I’m doing you a service,” you sniff, downing the rest of your drink. At the rate you’re going, you’re pretty sure you’ll blackout but sneaking a glance at Jungkook again, makes you forgo your concerns and move to get yourself another drink.

“Long Island iced tea?” You hear and turn around, drink sloshing in your cup. “You haven’t changed,” Taehyung smiles, eyeing the drink in your hand.

“Kim Taehyung!” You smile, tipsy already, and move to hug him, burying your head in his neck. “Why did everyone go through a growth spurt and not tell me,” you sniff when you fall back onto the heels of your feet.

“I like towering over you though,” he easily says, taking ahold of your waist and pulling you towards him. “Come dance with me.”

You easily agree, letting him move you to the living room where a couple of people were dancing to the music. You’ve never been a good dancer, always the one with two left feet but get some alcohol in you and suddenly your body just knows. Sure, you can’t call what you’re doing dancing, moving more towards fucking with your clothes on, if the thigh Taehyung has wedged between your legs and the way he’s gliding you on it has anything to go by.

You thank alcohol for giving you the confidence that surges through your body when you feel a twitch against your own thigh, making you smirk. The two of you dance to the music for a couple more minutes until he bends down, lips touching the shell of your ear. “Meet me on the balcony in five, yeah?”

“I thought you’d never ask, Kim,” you pull away. “Let me go grab my coat.”

 You’re quick to whirl around, moving towards Hoseok’s room, giggling to yourself at the prospect of your plan coming to fruition. Maybe this will let you see clearly and not drool thinking about Jungkook anymore. Clearly, you just need to get a good dicking down and Jungkook will be Jungkook again. 

Thankfully Hoseok’s room is unlocked and empty, you peer around the dark in search of your coat.

A hoe never gets cold but she does need her jacket when she has to make a quick run for it, just in case.

You aren’t there for long when you hear the door open again.

“I thought you said to meet on the balcony,” you laugh, turning around but your laughter dies in your throat when you realise it’s not Taehyung standing behind you.

“Jungkook?” You stutter, “what are you doing here?”

“You know, ___,” Jungkook tongues the inside of his cheek as he stalks his way towards you. “Hoseok I kind of understood… but Kim Taehyung?”

“Wh-what are you talking about?” You stutter, all the alcohol running through your veins suddenly evaporating. 

“I’m tired of playing games, ___,” Jungkook responds, ignoring your question. “I don’t want to hear any excuses anymore.”

“What do you mean, Jungkook?” You shrink under his gaze. He looks so different right now like a whole different person.

“I mean,” Jungkook chuckles, stepping closer as you inch back, the back of your thighs hit Hoseok’s desk. “I’m going to fuck you now.”

“Jungkook!” You shriek, “Don’t be ridiculous, you don’t want to f-fuck me.”

Jungkook closes his eyes, takes in a deep breath and immediately bends down so his face is a mere inch away from your own. “Oh, you have no idea just how much I want you, ___,” Jungkook says, his eyes falling to your lips. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted you. And I know you want me too.”

In a blink of an eye, he’s lifted you up and seated you on Hoseok’s desk.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you let out, eyes wide when you see the look in his eyes, the way his eyes roam your body with this innate hunger.

“Stop kidding yourself, ___. Don’t pretend like you didn’t see anything,” he says, leaning so close to you that he’s all you can see. Everything about him is so different now, it’s surprising that you just recently noticed the raw sexual appeal Jungkook exuded. You nervously lick your lips when you find his gaze drifting down once again, trailing your body with hunger you now recognize as the look he gave you when you found him fucking that girl a couple of days ago.

“It’s okay, noona,” he chuckles, the word sounding nothing but condescending coming out of his mouth this time. “I like being watched.”

"J-Jungook!" you gasp, shocked at his obscene words. He's so close to your vicinity that you're unable to think straight.

“And it looks like you like to watch, don’t you noona?” He teases, his hand gripping your waist to hold you into place.

“Tell me, noona,” he asks, licking his lips and you shudder when you see the wet sheen of saliva coat his lips. “Did you touch yourself that night? Did you get off to me fucking her?”

Without thinking, you find yourself nodding to his words, eyes wide, breathing hard and shallow. He groans, separating your legs to wedge himself between your thighs. He’s so close, pressing his body into yours, and you let him, gripping his shoulders to press him even closer to you.

“Do you even know what you do to me, ___?” He groans into your neck. He presses his hips into your stomach. “Do you feel what you’re doing to me?”

You whimper, feeling the thick shaft of his dick pressing into your skin. All too soon, the feeling is gone and he’s standing back looking at you with half-lidded eyes.

“Take off your clothes.”

You don’t even hesitate and slip your dress off, left only in a pair of lace panties. Jungkook groans at the sight, palming himself through his jeans. His eyes roaming your body, from the swell of your breasts down to the lacy material of your panties.

“Didn’t even wear a bra, you’re so naughty noona,” Jungkook smirks, shamelessly eyeing your breasts.

“I want to know what you did.”

“W-what?” You ask, peering up at him with confusion.

“I want to see how you touched yourself thinking about me.”

You shudder under his watchful gaze and you let out a shaky breath.

“Go on then.”

You slowly inch your hands down your body, sliding down your panties gently enough that they stick to the wetness of your core. You hear Jungkook curse under his breath at the sight.

“So wet, and I haven't even touched you,” he looks entranced, the way his eyes widen at the scene between your legs.

“You did this,” you mumble, swirling the wetness of your folds and spreading it across the expanse of your pussy. Biting your lips when your finger grazes your clit.

Jungkook moves to take a seat on the chair, getting a better view of your fingers working on yourself.

You ghost your fingers across your clit, breath shuddering every time the movement sends small a small wave of shock through your body. You should feel embarrassed, being watched so closely but the fact that Jungkook is here, watching you so intently just eggs you on. You circle your finger along your entrance as another gush of arousal flows through, glistening the tips of your fingers, and you gather the wetness, shoving it back in. A small moan leaves your lips when you curl a finger inside yourself.

"You're doing so well, noona," Jungkook whispers. His jeans are unbuttoned but he doesn't bother touching himself, too busy watching you. And you're in awe of him yourself, biting your lips as you slowly begin to grind onto your finger, slowly adding another digit. You shudder when you scissor them inside of yourself, your legs beginning to close into themselves but Jungkook pushes them apart, so he doesn't miss a single movement.

"Fuck, fuck! Jungkook," you gasp, "It feels so good!"

Your movements begin to get more erratic, faster as you start to lose yourself to the pleasure. Your thighs twitching when you press onto your clit. You sputter when you add another finger, slowing down your movements to get used to the pleasant feeling of feeling so full.

"J-Jungkook!" You moan out, your other hand reaching to grab ahold of the one that's grabbing your thigh, "I'm gonna-"

"Are you cumming already, ___?" He tilts his head, looking at you with a teasing smirk. "Did you enjoy the show that much?"

"Yes!" You grit out, biting your lips as you fuck yourself. "Wanna feel you so bad!"

You groan, hips lifting off the desk when you crook all three fingers inside of you, thumb rubbing against your clit. "Jungk- fuck, I'm cumming!" You cry out before your words taper off to strangled moans. You keep fucking yourself until you've ridden out the waves of your orgasm, panting by the time you come down from your high.

When you lazily open your eyes, you find Jungkook's eyes wide, staring between your legs.

"Fuck," he says before he peers up at you. "That was the hottest thing I've seen in my whole life." Before you can respond he's shoving his head between your legs and licking a long stripe up your slit before he latches onto your clit and begins to suck gently.

"Ah, Jungkook," you groan, head falling back and hitting the wall behind you. "It's too much Jungkook," you whimper, feeling oversensitive from your orgasm but he doesn't listen, eagerly lapping up your release like a man starved. He groans when his tongue probes at your hole, fucking it with shallow thrusts, sucking up the wetness. "Noona, you taste so good," he groans before diving back in. The oversensitivity has you sobbing, tears falling down your cheeks but you still find yourself pressing yourself against his tongue as hard as you can. The fact that it's Jungkook’s head between your legs has you tumbling towards a second orgasm at an embarrassingly fast pace. Without warning, the tight coil snaps once more and you're coming undone, grinding yourself onto his tongue, moaning out his name. This only spurs him further as he licks into you with even more vigor, lapping up whatever dribbles out of you like it's his only life source.

When the waves of pleasure settle down, you slump against the wall, utterly spent. Your thighs still twitching at the intensity of your orgasm.

"Fuck," Jungkook mutters, looking up at you, his breath hitched. You gasp when you notice his lips, cheeks, and chin dripping with your release. "You're so fucking hot," he mutters before moving to stand up. He strips himself of his shirt quickly, and your eyes widen once more over how toned his body is. You shamelessly ogle his body, eyes following the ridges of his muscles.

"When did you turn into such a muscle pig," you scoff when he flexes.

"Feels good when you cream yourself watching me work out in the backyard," Jungkook chuckles. You bristle at his words, flushing a deep crimson.

"You noticed?"

"Why do you think I put on such a show, noona?" He winks before he's standing close to you once again. "Now be a good girl, and suck me off."

You're quick to pull his jeans down, grateful that he had undone the button earlier, you're sure you would have fumbled with it the way your hands are shaking in anticipation.

The moment his cock is free from its confines, your eyes widen. It's a mouth-watering sight. His cock beautifully glistens as precum leaks out of the tip, sliding down the curved shaft and you lick your lips, following the trail with your eyes. Gingerly, you grab the shaft, spreading the wetness on the head and he hisses when your thumb digs into the slit. At his reaction you grow more bold, kissing a line on the side of his length, licking his skin more and more after each kiss. When you reach the head, you press another kiss on the tip before encasing it between your lips, swirling your tongue before you suckle on it lightly.

"F-fuck, ___!" Jungkook hisses. "Be a good girl and take it all in, okay?"

You easily comply, slowly sinking on his length, inch by inch you swallow his length as far as you can go before going back up to catch your breath. Once you get used to the length and the thick girth, you loosen your jaw and eagerly stuff him in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks as you take him in.

"Oh god, you're doing so well, baby," Jungkook grits, taking a hold of the hair that falls onto your face. His praise just makes you more eager and you go even further until your nose touches his pelvis. You stay in that position, nose hitting the base of his cock, and you inhale deeply, groaning when the heady scent invades your senses. Tears stream down your face as your throat constricts, jaw aching from the girth but feeling the weight of his cock on your tongue makes you moan. Jungkook's head falls back when he feels you moan around his cock, and when he finds you peering up at him with wide eyes, teary from the abuse of his dick, his cock twitches in your mouth.

"I'm gonna fuck your face now, can you take it?" He asks, pulling your face back by your hair and you nod eagerly.

"I didn't know you were such a cockslut, noona," Jungkook grins before he shoves his length down your throat. You immediately choke but he doesn't relent, shoving it down until you're pressed against him. You swallow wildly around his length, making him groan.

"Fuck, you're such a sight, noona,” he rasps, “With my cock stuffed down your throat."

He pulls out a little before thrusting back in, abusing your throat and you enjoy every minute of it. You gag every time he has you pressed against him, your eyes trained on the way his muscles go rigid.

"Look at you, getting your throat fucked like a whore," Jungkook says, enthralled by the way you swallow around his cock. "You're gonna have me cum before I've even fucked your pussy."

You hum, hips beginning to grind on the desk at the prospect of Jungkook fucking you.

Jungkook pushes his entire length into your mouth once more, letting it sit there as you sputter, the sides of your mouth dribbling with a mixture of your spit and his precum, before he pulls you off completely, his hand replacing your mouth as he slowly fists his cock.

You're breathing hard, gasping to catch your breath but your eyes don't leave how he's slowly working his shaft, hissing when squeezes at the base. You eye the way his abdominal muscles clench every time he thrusts into his hand.

"Can I-" You begin but stop, a surge of shyness falling over you and you avert your eyes.

"Hmm? What was that?" Jungkook asks, bending down so he's in your field of vision.

"I...I've been fantasizing," you explain, turning towards him again, slowly lifting your hand to have it trail down his chest. "About riding your abs... can I?" You ask, peering at him with your eyes wide.

"And you ask me why I work out so much when you have such a muscle kink, noona," Jungkook teases but moves to make you stand on your feet. You wobble on your feet a little but catch your balance quickly when Jungkook takes your seat on the desk, leaning back against the wall.

You quickly scamper to straddle him, his face so close to yours. Without thinking, you close the distance between the two of you and catch his lips with your own. He moans into your mouth, grabbing ahold of your waist to push you onto him, tilting your head to lick into your mouth. You start slowly, experimentally rubbing your abused pussy on the hot skin of his abdomen. You moan loudly when your clit rubs against the flexed ridges of his muscles.

"Mmm, as much as I love the sounds coming out of your mouth, ___, you have to be quiet," Jungkook says, kissing down your neck. "Unless you want the whole party to hear what you're doing."

You nod eagerly, biting your lips to muffle the sounds of your moans but the idea that anyone outside could figure out what the two of you doing sends a jolt of excitement down your spine and only make you move faster against him.

"You're so dirty noona," Jungkook bites your neck, making you whimper. "You want everyone to hear you, right, you want them to watch me fuck you."

You shiver when he slides a hand down your back and whine when he makes you sit up. At your dejected expression he chuckles, "Noona, do you want me to stuff you full of my cock or not?"

At his words, you move at lightning speed, standing on your shaky legs in anticipation. He's quick to stand up, moving behind you. You watch him sift through his jeans until he brings out a condom but you shake your head. "I-I'm on the pill," you clarify. "Want to feel you inside me."

“Fuck,” He groans, fisting his cock, "I can't believe how perfect you are, ___."

He moves behind you again, grabbing you until he's had you bent over the desk. "Now, you have to be a good girl and keep quiet, okay?" He says, smoothing a hand on your back and you eagerly nod, spreading your legs so he can stand between them. He drags his cock over your entrance, slowly sliding it down without adding any pressure so it slips down your entrance and nudges your sensitive clit. You yelp as streams of pleasure zap down your legs.

"I thought I told you to be quiet, noona," Jungkook chastises, "I bet you want Taehyung to walk in and see, don't you? Or is it Hoseok hyung, want him to see me fucking you in his room?"

You moan loudly at his words, eyes falling towards the door, where anyone could walk in an see the state you're in.

"Or should I stuff your panties in your mouth if you can't listen."

Unable to answer, you let out a breathy moan when his cock slides down your slit again, biting your lips to hold it back but ultimately fail.

"Guess, I have no choice," Jungkook says before stuffing the black lace into your mouth.

"Can you taste yourself, ___?" He asks, nudging your entrance with the head of his dick and you let out a muffled moan, nodding when your flavor hits your tongue.

"Do you taste how sweet you are, noona?" He pushes the head in and you groan, your walls clenching down, making Jungkook hiss.

"Fuck you're so tight, noona or is my cock just too big for your tiny pussy," Jungkook grits out, pushing in until half of his dick is lodged inside of you. Your legs are shaking at this point, walls convulsing at the intrusion but it feels so good to have a cock — Jungkook's cock —  inside of you. There's no guilt to the realization like you had been expecting, it feels nothing but right, like you were meant to have him filling you to the hilt. The sudden realization has you pushing back on his length, silently asking him to stuff you full, and he easily complies, pushing in until his length seated completely inside of you. Both of you still for a moment, you're left a whimpering mess, feeling so utterly full that you could just snap in half. Jungkook is no better, he shudders when he feels you convulse around him, cock twitching inside of you.

"F-fuck," he grits out, voice wavering. "You don't know how long I've wanted this for," he groans, leaning against you until his body is molded perfectly above yours.

You peer up at him and are shocked to see how fucked out he is, sweat beads his forehead, slowly sliding down the side of his face as he bites his lips raw.

"Noona," he groans, burying his face into the crook of your neck. "I can't believe I'm inside of you."

You shudder when he presses himself even further inside of you, and you feel like you might explode when he hasn't even started moving yet. You clench down on his length once more that has him break out of his thoughts and he pulls out before he's slamming into you again. You shriek into the lace at the brute force of the pace Jungkook's fucking into you. He's relentless with his thrusts, his thick cock filling you to the hilt before he's pulling out again. It's obscene, the way he's grunting and the way the slap of skin against skin reverberates through the room. You're lucky that the music is loud enough that nobody can be privy to what's going on inside.

You moan and drool against the fabric, hands desperately finding purchase onto the desk. You feel like the whole table might break apart against Jungkook's monstrous pace. His hold on your hips is so strong that you're sure he's leaving bruises on your skin, and that only makes you groan in delight at the prospect of having his marks branded on your skin.

"I won't last long," he grits out, voice deep and tinged with a guttural groan. You nod against the wood, eyes watering, letting him know that you're in the same state. Even if you didn't have your mouth stuffed full, you're sure you wouldn't be able to make a coherent word leave your lips. It's like every cell in your body is on fire, igniting every time Jungkook furiously fucks into you. Even after having this on your mind all summer, nothing could have prepared you for the sheer pleasure of actually feeling his cock inside of you, the way pushes into you. Without even having the realization of your impending release, the coil snaps and you're hurtling headfirst towards the strongest orgasm you've ever had in your life. Every muscle in your body goes rigid as you clench down onto his length with all the strength you have, stars glittering behind your eyelids as your walls flutter and convulse relentlessly around his cock. The feeling has Jungkook moaning, his forehead resting on your neck before spurts of hot cum begin to fill you up even more. He fucks you with even more vigor until you've milked out everything from him. He fucks his cum back into you one last time before he stops in his stuttering pace and collapses on top of you.

The two of you stay like that for a while, catching your breath. His body encases you in a sweltering heat, crushing you but you relish in the feeling of the sticky heat between the two of you. He presses chaste kisses on the base of your neck, his breath still heavy. It's silent but you feel complete, like a part of you had been missing and you just found it. You feel perfect.

Before he moves to get off you, he takes the lace out of your mouth and meets your lips in a deep kiss. Helping you stand up, his eyes follow the way his cum dribbles out of your pussy before he's quickly stuffing it back inside.

"Keep that in there, okay?" He says before he's kissing you again.

 Both of you change quickly and in silence, you tie your hair back haphazardly, hoping you can play it off as being far too drunk to care about your appearance.

When you look back at Jungkook, you notice him shoving the ruined pair of panties in his back pocket. Raising an eyebrow in question, he chuckles. "It's my souvenir for waiting this long to get to fuck you."

You scoff, looking back at your reflection to look at your ensemble once more before you're heading towards the door. Jungkook stays back so you can make your exit first. The music is still loud, even though the crowd has thinned out since you were last out there. You move towards the kitchen and grab yourself whatever cup you see to make your lie more believable. Peering out into the living room, you don't spot Hoseok or Yoongi anywhere, though you do notice a passed out Namjoon, bonsai tree still clutched tightly against his chest.

You don't move from your spot, even when you see Jungkook emerge from Hoseok's room, and he doesn't come to you either, opting to move back to his group of friends where the girl he was with eagerly clings onto him again.

You frown, even though it hadn't bothered you before, seeing her with him leaves a heavy feeling in your chest. You watch on as he easily laughs and blends into the crowd once more until you can't ignore the feeling anymore. Shaking your head, you're quick to move towards the entrance, suddenly feeling the telltale signs of an oncoming headache.

The following day, least to say, goes by seemingly uneventfully. Unless you count the fact that you catch Yoongi and Hoseok sitting in the kitchen when you make your way down the stairs. He’s quick to greet you with a playful wiggle of his eyebrows.

“What?” You squint, taking a seat next to him on the kitchen island.

“So you and Jeon finally get to do the nasty or what?”

“W-what?” You blanch at his words, choking at the piece of toast you'd stolen from his plate.

“Come on, don’t even try to hide it, I saw him go into my room after you, gotta admit, I really thought you'd end up with Taehyung last night but I guess I was wrong,” Hoseok shrugs, taking the stolen piece of toast back from you.

“If you thought she’d end up with Taehyung, why'd you bet on Jeon?” Yoongi grumbles, shoving a couple of bills in Hoseok’s open palm.

“Wait!” You snap, “you guys actually bet on it?”

Hoseok completely ignores your dramatic exclamation and turns to Yoongi. “Call it my own personal spidey sense, I can sense when people fuck…like I sensed that you were getting fucked yesterday.”

Yoongi’s quick to smack Hoseok across the back of his head.

“So… my grand plan worked out,” you pass a smirk to Hoseok, and hold out your palm.

“Wait you guys bet on me?” Yoongi looks between the two of you, eyes wide.

“Hey, gotta make a living and stay jobless at the same time somehow,” you shrug, counting the bills in your hand.

“Don’t think I haven’t forgotten about you and Jungkook,” Hoseok points his fork towards you. “You still have to tell me the gruesome details.”

“I’m not telling you any details, that ship sailed when you started bumping uglies with my brother.”

“Hey, I’m willing to spill, you’re the one who was so against it,” Hoseok shrugs, “Plus, I need to know if I have to burn my sheets or not.”

You pause, giving him the side-eye before you smirk. “Not your sheets… but you may want to get yourself a new desk.”

The next few days followed by slowly. You find yourself finishing off all your assignments with little to no distractions — unless you call watching the entirety of Instant Hotel a distraction. By the third day, you’re back to your normal routine and you decide that the whole thing with Jungkook was the cause of your lack of sexual gratification, and you’re totally over it. It kind of sucks that you had to literally fuck it out of your system to stop lusting over your dongsaeng, but it happened and there’s nothing you can change about it. That’s what you decide —  that you were completely okay.

Except that, you’re not. On the fifth day, you have a meltdown over the whole ordeal, and even Hoseok can’t make your anxieties go away. You avoid the backyard at all costs and don’t even turn to steal any more alcohol from your mother’s stash because, just as you blame your lack of a sex life that landed you in this situation, you also blame alcohol. This time, though, you’ve truly quit alcohol.

It’s on the seventh day that you actually see Jungkook, he doesn’t see you but that’s mostly because you duck out of sight before he gets the chance. It’s not like he was on his way to seek you out either, you see him jogging towards his dad’s truck, probably out on his way to run some errands. At least he hasn’t been hanging around your house these days, which makes the whole thing less awkward. Now, all you have to do is go through two more months just like this and you’ll be back in college, far, far away from here.

A week. It’s been a week and approximately three hours since you had gotten a glance at Jungkook. With your more recent research, you declare that you are indeed not okay. And to your luck, you have no effective distractions — Yoongi —  to your disposal. You’re home alone, having exhausted your last remaining brain cells by watching reality tv for seven hours straight. You’re casually perusing through Netflix once more because one more episode couldn’t hurt, when the doorbell rings.

You huff, wondering if you’d ordered a pizza and had forgotten about it, which seems quite impossible, but still, you don’t cancel it out completely. But what you find after opening the door is even more shocking than a forgotten pizza delivery. None other than Jeon Jungkook stands outside your front door, sheepishly smiling at you.

“Yoongi’s not home,” you say, immediately grimacing at your harsh tone, not expecting it to hold that much malice.

Jungkook’s eyes dart to the side before he nods, “Uh, yeah I know,” he clears his throat before looking back at you. “I came here to see you.”

“Okay...” you say, moving to the side so he can walk in. You make your way into the living room without waiting for him, trying really hard to appear casual but end up standing in the middle of the room with your arms crossed. “Why’d you ring the bell?” You ask once he’s inside, “And why’d you come through the front door?”

He rubs the back of his neck nervously, “I-it’s because I wanted to do things properly,” he shifts on his feet, “And I don’t think barging into the room will do us any good.”

It’s not difficult to understand what he’s referring to, making you frown at his choice of words. “Listen, if this is about that night, it’s all good okay? You don’t need to worry about that, we were drunk and these things can happen to anyone so you don’t need to bother yourself over something like that. I don’t expect you to do anything about it, I’m a big girl and I can take it,” you ramble on even though your mind is screaming at you to shut up!

“It’s not about that!” Jungkook blurts out, “Uh, I mean, is it technically about that but not what you think,” he reassures right after.

The two of you stare at each other in awkward silence for a few seconds before he breaks. “Listen, ___,” he begins, sighing. “I just wanted to apologise—”

“Like I said Jungkook, you don’t need to,” you interrupt him.

“Will you let me finish, ___?” Jungkook asks, smiling at you and the look alone has you shutting up. “As I was saying, I’m sorry for how I left things last time. I should have been more clear about my feelings.” The more he talks, the more he flushes. It’s so strange seeing Jungkook stammer around you now as if he didn’t stuff your own panties in your mouth a week ago to get you to shut up. But you can’t complain, you’ve always loved to watch him squirm.

“What I mean to say is, noona... I meant what I said that night,” he continues, “About how long I’ve waited to-” He clears his throat awkwardly. “How long I’ve waited for you.”

You still blankly stare at him, not sure where this is going at all. Was he trying to have another round? He’s probably figured out that no one was home, and honestly speaking you wouldn’t be opposed to it either…

“I like you, ___,” he blurts out. “I’ve always liked you but I never thought you even saw me as a... man… until recently. And I know we, uh, have done it, but I still wanted to formally tell you.”

A smile starts lighting up your face as he continues to stutter and stammer out a confession.

“Jeon Jungkook!” You exclaim, “Are you… asking me out?” You ask, fully grinning at him now, even though you know the answer already.

He’s bashful under your gaze, moving to rub at his red ears, “Um, yeah I am,” he says before handing you a paper bag you hadn’t noticed before. “It’s the end of the month, after all, so I guessed might as well shoot my shot.”

You take the bag, peering at it curiously until you take out what’s inside: a bottle of Pinot Noir.

[hypnomicimagines]

🌟Fluff Alphabet: A🌟

A – Affectionate (How affectionate are they with an S/O?)

BUSTER BROS

Yamada Ichiro

Ichiro tries not to constantly be in your space out of respect, worried about smothering you to the point you can’t stand being around him at all. He really likes to just sling an arm around your shoulder and pull you close to him, using the closeness to press a kiss to your cheek or temple when conversations go idle. He’s naturally affectionate to the point he doesn’t even notice he’s touching you or pulling you close half the time, simply liking to touch you in some way as it’s comforting to him. It’s gotten to the point where his brothers stick their tongues out at his behavior, making the eldest laugh as he tells them they’ll understand when they’re in love.

Yamada Jiro

Jiro wishes he was smooth enough to put the moves on you without second-guessing himself, especially in public when it could stop being from bothering you, but the bravest thing he can do is reach over to hook his pinky with yours. He generally hopes you’ll be the one to take the hint that he wants something more and grows frustrated if you don’t, trying to hype himself up to get to a full hand-holding session. He craves being more affectionate but he’s awkward about it, not knowing how to just admit that he wants it. He gets slightly better the longer you’re together but Jiro still prefers you just initiate so he can be reassured you want it, too.

Yamada Saburo

Saburo is the Yamada brother that values his space the most and isn’t as openly clingy as his older brothers. He likes existing in the same space as you and finds comfort in even the slightest touches like when you rest your head on his shoulder or hook arms with him. Cuddling or even asking for a hug feels like more advanced intimacy that he’s not fully prepared to ask from you, always fidgeting and glancing at you when he wants to do something but can’t bring himself to just act. It’s easy to read him to figure out when he wants some affection and even a simple kiss can tide him over for days.

MAD TRIGGER CREW

Aohitsugi Samatoki

Samatoki’s got an image he at least semi-attempts to keep up but generally fails around you as he can’t find it in him to deny you. If you pout enough he’ll give in and give you a quick kiss (heavily depending on who’s around) but he won’t do much more unless you’re in a more relaxed setting. If you’re in the VIP section of a club with the others in MTC he doesn’t care nearly as much since they both know you belong to him and often times you ended up on his lap, one hand on your thigh as he continued conversing with them like nothing happened.

Iruma Jyuto

Jyuto likes to keep a comfortable distance when you’re out in public together and he doesn’t feel the need to show you off like some others might, more affectionate with his words as your petname from him tends to slip out whether he intends it to or not. But in private there’s something about being cuddled up together that makes him feel at peace, arms solidly wrapped around you and refusing to let go unless one of you had something really important to do. There are some days where he comes home from work so exhausted all he wants to do is be held and to forget all the unfortunate things he’s gotten himself into.

Rio Mason Busujima

Rio goes back and forth but he’s always consistent with the fact he cares about you in his own way. He’s far better at taking care of your needs, like keeping you well fed and cleaning your clothes, compared to being physically affectionate just due to how awkward he is. He needs to be prompted to do anything even as simple as a hug and he’s always a gentleman, asking before he kisses or hugs you just to assure that’s what you want from him. It can be embarrassing how he always feels the need to call attention to it but Rio doesn’t like ‘reading between the lines’ preferring if you blatantly tell him what you want so he can be more efficient at fulfilling your needs.

FLING POSSE

Amemura Ramuda

Ramuda is more affectionate when he’s playing his ‘cutesy’ role out in public, constantly clinging to your side, showering your face in kisses (enjoying the jealous squeals of the other women at what a cute couple you were), and openly talking about all the things you did for him to Dice and Gentaro (also to make them jealous). Behind closed doors when he feels like he can act more himself he tends to like his space, enjoying being alone with his thoughts from time to time and given a moment to breathe even though it’s him trying to keep up this act. Granting him this space just leaves him ready to come curl up with you at night, mumbling sweet nothings and wondering how he’d managed to find someone this understanding.

Yumeno Gentaro

Gentaro is someone more independent, who doesn’t feel the need to see you every day and understands that adults have their own agendas to attend to. He can’t say he doesn’t miss you during these periods as being able to walk to a different part of the house that you’re relaxing in while he’s suffering from writers block just to exchange a few kisses can make a world of difference for his emotional state, but he doesn’t want to appear to reliant on you. But he loves quiet simple moments where you’re sitting on a couch watching a movie together, fingers interlaced as you turn to each other from time to time to offer up a comment.

Arisugawa Dice

Dice doesn’t notice that he’s constantly touching you or just incredibly close because he’s always been that way, even before you were dating; he just naturally finds himself drawn towards you and accepts that that’s where he’s supposed to be. He can be quite needy when you’re alone together, whining that he wants your attention if you’re too focused on some other task for a while, nudging you, leaning against you, doing anything he can to be a distraction to get the love he craves.

MATENRO

Jinguji Jakurai

Jakurai is awkward and bumbling with his affection, liking to brush hair out of your eyes or indulge in gentle touches, cupping your face, stroking your cheeks, showing his subtle doting care style. He wants to do so much more but he always talks himself out of it, worried it’ll be too much or that he’d be pushing some boundary that he didn’t know about. Openly communicating and letting him know he can, indeed, reach out to hold your hand or hug you from behind without having to ask permission first (situation permitting) will do wonders for the relationship and you’ll find Jakurai is actually far more affectionate than he’d originally shown.

Izanami Hifumi

Hifumi’s affection is a little more downplayed when he’s not in ‘host mode’ but not by much, his affection generally coming out more when he does things for you rather than physically (not that he’s lacking in that department either). Hifumi’s lovin’ can be quite sudden as he likes to come up from behind you suddenly, arms wrapping around your waist as he asks what you’re doing, sometimes even extending to him jumping on your bed to wake you up and ending up falling asleep with you again because of how comfortable it is to lay with you.

Kannonzaka Doppo

Doppo second-guesses himself a lot which stops him from doing some of the things he’d like to do but he tries to be affectionate, wanting to show you how you make him feel and also wanting to show he can be a good boyfriend (just in case you had doubts). He feels like he could probably do better, he could probably hold you or kiss you more, but you don’t seem unhappy with how things are. The easiest time for him to express his feelings for you are in the morning or at night after he’s finally home from work, so sleepy he doesn’t even care if he appears like a clingy nuisance, just wanting his daily dose of your love to help lull him to sleep.

BAD ASS TEMPLE

Harai Kuko

Kuko isn’t the type to hold back so you can guarantee that if he wants to do something, he’s gonna do it. He’s been scolded before for just going for it instead of acting and he tries not to just go off his instinct, carefully reading the situation to see what might be most appropriate. He doesn’t think you should lie to him either and if you want him to back off some he won’t mind; he likes being left alone too and has his moods where he also doesn’t want to be touched, having no issue with telling you he wants to be left alone.

Aimono Jyushi

Jyushi really, truly, just wants to shower you with all the love he has in his heart for you (which is a lot) but he can’t always bring himself to act on it, instead using his dramatic words to let you know how highly he thinks of you. He likes the cuter shows of affection and always seems stunned that you want to kiss or hold his hand in public, tearing up as you’re holding hands and loving when you give him that reassuring squeeze that lets you know even if he cries a bit you’re not embarrassed to be there with him. It goes a long way with Jyushi to be able to act loving towards you in public and though he seems to make a mad dash out of your personal space after giving you a smooch, you can’t say you don’t love it.

Amaguni Hitoya

Hitoya values his own space, he likes to be left alone and at night he gets too hot to constantly be cuddled up with you, but he knows how to take care of you. Cuddling is probably his favorite thing to do and he doesn’t mind it when you pull him away from a heavy case momentarily, arms draped around his shoulders as he leans back against you with closed eyes, simply enjoying the closeness. He’s the type to just like when you’re near him, in the same house, not really minding if you’re doing separate activities.

DOTSUITARE HOMPO

Nurude Sasara

When you’re alone you and Sasara could practically morph into one being with how often he wants to just be close to you, even if his job is partially to blame; there are so many nights where he comes home and you’re already out cold, or you’re working when he’s finally got a day off, so he tries to make it count. He jokes all the time about being clingy but you hadn’t realized the joke had plenty of foundation in reality until you’d moved in with him. He’s not above backing off when you want space but it seems like he’s always in the mood to cuddle, jumping into action when you get into cuddle position without you even having to say a word.

Tsutsujimori Rosho

Rosho loves when you’re sitting next to him on the couch when you’re either watching something or he’s just reading and you sling your legs across his lap, showing how comfortable you truly were with him; he likes resting a hand on your knee (sometimes feeling spicy enough to get slightly further up your thigh) and just feeling you, knowing you’re there even if you’re not talking bringing him immense comfort. He can’t say he’d reject cuddling ever either but he prefers keeping it toned down in public where his students might see him, knowing how invested in his personal life the nosier ones can get even with something as simple as holding hands.

Amayado Rei

Rei’s affection level heavily depends on the relationship you have and how much you actually want out of him. If you’re the type who needs to be loved constantly, who wants to have him holding you at every moment, he can work with that just as much as someone who doesn’t want to be touched at all. He doesn’t have a personal preference and finds fulfillment in the relationship either way though he’s notably more affectionate when you’re his actual significant other compared to someone he considers just a fling or a friend with benefits.

[imagines-by-rose]

New Recruit - Part 3

Hi, lovelies! So excited to post this chapter, I’ve been nit-picking and rewriting it for a while. Hopefully it paid off! Enjoy!

Summary: Y/n is brought into Kingsman as Lancelot after the events leading to Roxy’s death, and Eggsy is furious. As the two work together to stop a notorious jewel thief, however, attitudes change - and feelings develop.

Pairing: Eggsy Unwin x Reader

Genre: Angst w/ a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort

Warnings: Kissing, Sexual Themes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eggsy had been adrift for some time now, enjoying the peaceful obscurity between wakefulness and sleep that can only come without a morning alarm -- a rarity, in his case. His eyes were closed, and he faintly registered a comfortable warmth on his side and a slight tickle by his nose.

Wait. What?

He reluctantly pried his eyes open, suddenly aware that he was not, in fact, in his stateroom. Unsure whether to move, he darted his gaze downward and was met with a tangled mess of loose h/c braids. Y/n was curled against him, her hand resting on his chest and her leg draped over his. Eggsy noticed his arm was laid beneath her, coming up to wrap around her waist.

If it weren’t for his rising urge to sneeze, he’d never move again.

He tried his best to keep still, using his free hand to rub his nose. His efforts must not have been enough, as y/n soon began to stir. Eggsy froze, not wanting the moment to end just yet. Y/n hummed softly into his chest, fingers lightly grabbing the fabric of his shirt as she nestled herself impossibly closer to him. She shifted her leg upwards as she did so, leaving a trail of fire on Eggsy's skin that grew near unbearable when her knee finally came to rest against the crotch of his pants.

If he weren’t fully awake before, he certainly was now. He felt his pants shift around him, embarrassment -- and excitement -- flushing his cheeks. Though, he couldn’t say he wasn’t enjoying this little conundrum he found himself in.

What should I do? I can’t wake her now. Dunno if I could handle another move like that, though.

He closed his eyes, half-heartedly willing the issue to go away. Y/n’s breathing was steady, giving him confidence that she’d stay asleep for a while longer, at least.

He sent her a smirk. You comfortable now, love? This what you wanted?

Y/n mumbled again. Eggsy grinned, unconsciously tightening his grip around her waist.

He happily resigned himself to his fate, taking in the views of her stateroom from his peculiar position. He was relieved to find a blanket thrown across the back of the sofa and brought it over himself. When he was satisfied with his work, he let himself relax, listening to y/n’s rhythmic breathing and her occasional dreamy hums.

I could get used to mornings like this, I think.

It wasn’t much longer until y/n began to stir again. Eggsy shut his eyes in childlike excitement, pretending to be asleep. He felt her head slowly lift from his chest as she groggily looked around. Her breath hitched -- she must have noticed where her leg was -- and Eggsy suppressed a chuckle. Y/n slowly raised herself, goosebumps littering Eggsy’s skin at the sudden absence of her warmth. He was about to ‘wake up’ when he felt her fingers affectionately brush his hair from his face and gently sift through his locks.

“Guess I fell asleep on you,” she whispered. Eggsy could hear the smile in her voice. “Sorry ‘bout that. Thanks for putting up with me. You’re a true Kingsman gentleman, Eggsy.”

It took everything he had to stay unresponsive when he felt her press a lingering kiss to his temple. 

Her hand gave one final comb through his hair before she stood, her quiet footsteps retreating to the water closet. Eggsy finally allowed himself to open his eyes once he heard the door shut.

His face, to everyone’s curiosity, was beaming for the rest of the day.

*  *  *  *  *  *

Eggsy knocked on y/n’s door later that evening, his spy gear discreetly equipped within his black tuxedo disguised as subtle, emerald green accents which Merlin specifically selected for the mission.

“Ready to go, love? Merlin said to be at the car in fifteen minutes.”

“Just a second!”

Eggsy found himself speechless when she appeared in the doorway. Y/n was dressed in a matching emerald gown, the matte velvet draping elegantly over her features. A long slit up the skirt revealed soft s/c skin, and her sparkling heels added a bit of height -- the top of her head now reaching Eggsy’s chin rather than his shoulder.

Bloody hell, she’s stunning.

Y/n seemed frazzled, nervous for her first mission. “Sorry to keep you waiting, I’m just trying to get this damn necklace on. I’ve never been very good with this kind of clasp. You’d think Merlin would’ve known that when he picked this outfit for me. He’s a spy for God’s sake!”

After another failed attempt, she huffed in frustration. “Would you mind…?” she asked, handing Eggsy the necklace in defeat.

Words struggled to return to him. “O-oh. Yeah, sure.”

Y/n turned around. The gown’s halter neck left her back bare, fabric pooling teasingly just below the curve of her spine. Eggsy stared open-mouthed, unable to think clearly.

What am I doing again?

Y/n laughed after a moment, looking over her shoulder. “Eggsy? You there?”

He blinked. “Yeah, sorry. Just let me--”

Eggsy carefully moved her hair out of the way, his fingers brushing over her neck as he did so. Y/n’s breath stilled at the touch. He took his time with the necklace; the feeling of her skin and the faint sound of her gasp left his hands clumsy.

She turned back with a quick “cheers” once he was finished, smiling brightly at him.

God, she’s so fucking cute.

He cleared his throat, trying to collect himself. “Well, so much for Merlin not wanting us to draw any unnecessary attention,” he joked. “You’re an angel if there ever was one, y/n. You’ll put that diamond to shame, an’ all.”

Her smile turned sheepish and she blushed. It was Eggsy’s new favorite color, he decided.

Y/n took a playful step back against the wall and studied him, eyes wandering over his body. “You clean up rather well too, y‘know, if I do say so myself. That tailored suit of yours is doing wonders for you.”

Eggsy felt a rush of confidence, his attitude growing bold.

“Oh yeah?” he stepped towards her with a smirk, nearly closing the distance between them. He leant his forearm against the wall, arching over her. His head dipped by her ear, voice dropping to a whisper. “You like what you see, love?”

Y/n stood her ground, acutely aware of the warmth pooling in her stomach. A flirty gilt shone in her eyes as she raised her head in challenge.

“And if I do?”

Eggsy grazed his lips teasingly below her ear, his soft skin leaving feather-light touches against her jaw. She could feel his body heat as he towered over her. Y/n tried her best to keep her composure, not wanting him to know just how much he was affecting her.

His voice rumbled in his throat. “Then maybe we should do somethin’ about it, eh?”

Y/n caught her breath after a moment. “Hmm, I don’t know…” she tried to tease, her thoughtful hum sounding far more sensual than she would’ve liked, much to Eggsy’s amusement. “I-- I think I might need a bit more convincing.” She drew in sharply when his lips found her collarbone, his hand moving to draw delicate lines up and down the center of her exposed back. Her chest heaved in excitement. “I mean, you didn’t even bring me flowers, or try to serenade me, or--”

He let out a growl as he captured her lips in his. She chirped in surprise before easing her body into him, knees buckling. Eggsy quickly snaked his arm around her waist to support her, his hand slipping just beneath the fabric of her gown. She moaned when his tongue pushed past her lips, a sound he was determined to draw from her again. Y/n’s hands made their way into his hair, fingers sifting through his golden tufts. It drove him crazy.

Needing to feel closer to her, Eggsy brought his arms beneath her thighs and lifted her up against the wall. She squealed, her legs eagerly wrapping around his waist. Eggsy reveled in her laugh, momentarily losing himself in her gaze.

When he was sure she was comfortable, his lips returned to her neck with a newfound intensity. Y/n tilted her head gratefully to give him access. Her quivering gasps sounded in his ear and he felt her legs tighten around him when he reached a particularly sensitive spot.

Oh, she’s gonna be the death of me.

He trailed kisses up along her jawline before sealing his lips to hers once more. Eggsy could feel himself losing control when she took his lower lip between her teeth. He pulled away and carefully set her down before he was unable to stop himself, heavy breaths prattling against each other’s flushed skin.

Y/n let out an airy laugh. “Well this won’t do. I’ve made a real mess of your hair, haven’t I?” She made an unsuccessful effort to smooth it back, the tip of her tongue darting out in concentration. Eggsy didn’t think she even knew she was doing it. He stared in awe, delight tugging at the corners of his lips.

So she always does that when she’s focused. Adorable.

He brought his hands to cup her face, thumbs brushing over her cheeks. She stilled, her lips parting as her attention was drawn to his warm stare. Y/n let her hands fall against his chest and leant into him, looking up into his green eyes through her lashes. His gaze softened in admiration. He never wanted to look at anything else.

Eggsy slowly brought his lips to hers once more, heated swells giving way to long, tender strokes. She matched his movements with ease, the two allowing their emotions to flood into the kiss. His hands roamed down her neck, her arms, her sides, before finally resting on her hips. He pulled her flush against him, smiling happily when he felt her arms wrap around his neck to further deepen their embrace.

“Ahem. I see you two have been practicing your newlywed act.”

The two jumped apart, their wide eyes staring at Merlin like deer in headlights.

He chuckled. “Though, you may want to straighten yourselves up a bit. Disheveled hair and smeared lipstick aren’t exactly fitting for this sort of event.”

Y/n put her hands over her face and whined in embarrassment. Eggsy laughed heartily, placing a comforting arm around her waist. He wiped his thumb across his lips in an attempt to remove the lipstick.

“Guess we got a bit carried away, bruv. It’s your fault for choosing this dress for her, Merlin, you devil!”

Merlin smiled knowingly, giving Eggsy a wink.

“The event is in an hour. I’ll meet you both at the car in five minutes.”

Eggsy and y/n shared a giddy laugh once Merlin left, rolling their eyes when his shout traveled down the hallway.

“And you two had better have your clothes on!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hokay, my first attempt at writing anything remotely saucy. As always, I hope you enjoyed it! I’m currently working on part 4, and plan to have that out sometime next week.

‘Til next time!

[gallavictorious]

I'll admit to bristing at “Ian and Mickey question who is the 'man' in their relationship” but that's primarily due to the phrasing (which I would argue is sexist rather then homophobic in this case, and yes, I think it's relevant to make the distinction). That being said, I find it highly plausible that the two of them would have somewhat different ideas about who gets to have the last say, so to speak, especially when it comes to, for instance, whether or not SECRET CRIME is an acceptable source of income. (And no, we don't know that this is what they're fighting about, but I think it's likely connected to their argument in 11x01, which leads to Mickey agreeing to play by Ian's rules in 11x02 – he gets a job! - but then something goes haywire and the whole thing comes to a head – and is resolved – in 11x03. And then maybe they're robbers together?!?! Could be wishful thinking on my part, though; I've been fervently hoping for some time that the issue of Mickey's criminal lifestyle would come up in season 11.)

On the one hand, they're both independent and headstrong, so on some level I think each of them thinks that it should be them that makes the final call when push comes to show. They both have this idea that they're the reasonable one in the relationship, see – and they are simultaneously mistaken and correct, as they take turns being reasonable and recklessly impulsive. On the other hand, I think Ian has a notion that now that they're married they should talk things through and make most decisions together, striving for consensus in the process. That's... pretty understandable, right? A normal couple thing to do. But Mickey has spent his entire life making his own calls, very rarely having anyone else to rely on, and the idea that he suddenly needs to run things by someone else... yeah, I think that would take some getting used to for him. (Pre-season 4 Mickey wouldn't let Ian help him, in season 4 they were both stumbling around, and in season 5 Ian was not in a position to be a stable partner and Mickey had to make some hard decisions for both of them; they obviously did not work through their issues in prison – not a good place for it anyway – and once they got out everything happened so damned fast, and then they were newly-weds and giddy with that, and yes, I do completely buy that this would come up now, once they're stable and committed.)

This doesn't in any way, shape or form mean that Mickey is selfish and only thinks about himself, by the way, because part of his instinctive and independent decision-making involves doing right by the ones you love, whether that means stepping in to stop them from pullling stupid shit or getting yourself thrown into prison to protect them. You don't need to talk about shit all the time; you should just do what you want and what is right and what you need to do, and let your loved ones do the same.

At the end of the day, Ian and Mickey are both highly invested in taking care of one another, but they have pretty different notions about how to best go about that; to Ian it means consulting each other and making joint decisions as a couple, and to Mickey it means giving the other the freedom to do whatever the hell they want, while being ready to step in and pull the brakes if things get out of hand. There is actually nothing wrong with either of these approaches, but if you're not on the same page things will get messy.

(Incidentally, if their confict involves Mickey's criminal lifestyle, I don't Ian's objections to it will be primarily moral – unless it involves serious maiming or murder or the victimization of especially vulnerable innocents – but rather a concern that it will get in the way of them building a better life together. As for Mickey, I can see him getting somewhat hurt by Ian's disapproval because he might see it as Ian wanting to change him because he doesn't think Mickey's good enough the way he is. He's very mistaken about that, obviously, but yeah. I can see it.)

And I get that some of you are not interested in watching this; we want what we want and there's nothing wrong with wanting to see them happy and at peace and sweet to each other all the time. I certainly respect that (even if I do squint at the notion that anything else would be OOC, because I have yet to see a single argument that makes a good case for that). For me, though, and regardless of the unfortunate phrasing in the episode description, this is an entirely organic and really interesting conflict for them to have, and I'm really interested in seeing how they negotiate this and grow from it – and I'd feel robbed if I was not allowed to see it play out.

[wrenhyperfixates]

Yule Log

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: With Christmas quickly approaching, Loki finds himself missing his favorite time on Asgard. If he can’t go back home to celebrate, you’re determined to bring the party to him. Warnings: just the tiniest bit angsty, but mainly just fluff. And a lot of kissing A/N: We’re already halfway through December, can you believe it? To continue the spread of holiday cheer, please enjoy my latest fic! Happy reading :)

Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedgiant​​ @lunarmoon8​ @twhiddlestonsstuff​ @lokistan​ @thelokiimaginechroniclesficrecs​ @gaitwae

Disclaimer: Gif not mine 

“Thank you for coming,” you said to some of the last guests as they made their way out into the chilly night air.

Being Tony’s personal assistant was no easy feat, and sometimes it meant you had to be in full work mode at parties rather than being able to let loose. So many times your boyfriend tried to pull you away from all the seriousness, but you would only be able to enjoy a dance or two before having to do something else. It was yet another reason why Loki was not a fan of Stark’s shindigs.

“Darling,” he called as you made your way back into the room. “Come sit with me now?”

“I can’t. There’s still people here.”

“And they are occupied talking to Stark and Captain Rogers,” he pouted. “Certainly you can rest for a minute. You deserve it, after all.”

“Ok, I guess,” you replied, walking over. He pulled you down onto his lap before you could change your mind, kissing you quickly but passionately. “Well if that’s what you mean by rest, I would have stopped working hours ago.”

“Duly noted,” he said, nuzzling into your neck, enjoying your scent. “I will be sure to be more specific next time.”

You giggled against his lips as he kissed you again. The whole scene was picturesque, really. Sitting with your boyfriend on the couch, a tree in the background, snow falling outside, and a fire crackling nearby; it was like something right out of a painting. Or maybe a dream. Then again, that’s how you felt about every second you spent with Loki.

Just when you were getting settled against him, your boss called your name, and waved you over with a smile. He probably needed you for another scheduling problem. At least you would be getting a break for Christmas soon. You sighed and pecked Loki on the cheek, wiggling out of his grip, much to his protest. With a promise to meet him in your shared room as soon as you finished up with the last few guests, he let you go.

Roughly half an hour later, you were stumbling into your quarters, feet sore and eyes tired. Walking into your bedroom to change, you saw Loki standing by the window, his shirt in his hands as if he just forgot what he was doing halfway through changing. You hugged him from behind, resting your forehead between his shoulder blades. His hand immediately alighted on your arm and began rubbing slow circles on your skin. You’d noticed he did that anytime he was pensive or working through a lot of emotions.

“Hey, are you ok? Do you need to talk?” you asked.

“I am alright, my angel. You need not worry,” he told you, turning around to hug you and kissing your forehead gently. “Now, I believe we were going to watch a movie.”

You frowned at the way he changed the topic, but decided not to push the subject. You could always try again in the morning, but you didn’t want to make him talk if he didn’t feel like it. You got changed while Loki set up the film, something he was still very proud that he’d learned how to do. Settling on the couch, Loki rested his head on your lap, and you played with his hair as Rudolph began to play on the TV.

You looked down at the beautiful god, wondering what was going through that beautiful mind of his. There was no doubt in your mind; you loved Loki. The thing was that he could be so guarded sometimes that you felt left out. Like he was keeping things from you. It was more out of concern for him that it made you worry, not because you didn’t trust him. In fact, you trusted him with your life. You only wished that he would do the same with you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, you woke up in the bed, wrapped in Loki’s arms. You didn’t quite remember getting off of the couch last night, and you knew Loki must have carried you after you fell asleep. His eyes were on you, as you laid there. You could feel his loving gaze even before opening your eyes. You liked to do that sometimes, pretend like you were still asleep and bask in the joy of Loki admiring you. Whether or not he told you everything, he obviously adored you, and this was a nice reminder of that. Though, now that you thought about the issue of communication, you cracked open your eyes, determined to get him to tell you what is wrong.

“Good morning, darling,” he said, smiling warmly at you. “I love you.”

It always made you flustered when Loki told you that so soon after waking, like it was the most important thing. Like he had to make sure you knew before anything else happened. Before you could even get up most days, he was saying those words. They always made you snuggle further into your chest, resolving to stay in bed a bit longer, rather than getting up and starting your duties for that day.

“Morning, Loki. I love you too.”

Still laying together in a tangle of limbs, the two of you chatted for a bit longer, and you were carefully working your way up to the question you wanted to ask. It was a delicate topic, for sure, but maybe he’d be soft enough after all the pillow talk to share.

“Loki, can I ask you a question? And can you answer me honestly?” you asked.

“Of course. I will do my best, my angel.”

You frowned a little at the response, but plowed on anyway. “Last night you were upset about something. What was it? You know I worry about you. It’s ok, you can tell me.”

“Well,” he sighed. “It is nothing much, really. It is just with all these Christmas festivities, I am reminded of my mother’s favorite celebration. The winter solstice ball was always around this time. She loved planning the Yule celebrations. It was why she put up with the planning of every other ball, just so she could do this one. It was always the most fun, for her love of the holiday shone through every minute detail of the day.”

You looked at features, peaceful and happy, a small smile tugging at his lips. You wanted to be happy for him, too, but it made your heart break as you read deeper into what he was saying. It wasn’t just the holiday he was upset over.

“Oh, Loki. You miss your mother,” you cooed as he sadly nodded.

“It is nothing you need worry yourself over, really.”

“Yes, Loki, I do. Because I love you. If you’re allowed to worry over me, I can over you, too.”

“That is... fair,” he conceded, though he was frowning a little. “So what are you going to do? Nothing too over the top, I hope.”

“I’m not exactly sure yet, but I’ll start with this,” you admitted, cupping his cheek and kissing him. You started on his lips, but then moved to placing little pecks all over his face. His smile had returned by the time you finished. “Better?”

“Much,” he confessed as he pulled you closer, earning a giggle. “But you are not done trying to fix this, are you?”

“Not even close.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days later you were setting up the common room for a solstice party, much like the Asgardian ballroom would be looking soon. You’d asked Thor more about how the holiday was celebrated on his home planet and, together with the rest of the Avengers, you were getting ready to surprise Loki. Though you had Bucky and Peter keeping him busy and out of the way right now, you were sure that Loki suspected something was up.

“Are you sure this is everything Thor?” you nervously questioned, giving the room a once-over. “Everything has to be perfect.”

“Do not worry, my friend. You were very thorough.”

After combing through your notes one last time, just to make sure there wasn’t anything you were missing, you called Peter and Bucky to bring Loki back. In true surprise party fashion, you turned the lights off and got into hiding places. When he walked in, you all jumped up and screamed “Happy Yule.” For a second he didn’t move, and the silence was kind of awkward as he stood there with a sort of stunned but otherwise unreadable expression on his face. Finally, he gently said your name.

“You don’t like it, do you?” you said, feeling like you might cry.

“Like it? No, no, I do not. Darling,” he said, shaking his head before breaking out into a huge grin and crushing you in a hug, using his godly strength to pick you up and spin you around. “I love it! I was certain you had some trick up your sleeve, but this? This is beyond my wildest imagination. It is perfect! Thank you, love.”

“Really?” you squealed in excitement. “Loki, that means so much to me.”

“And the fact that you went through all this trouble means so much to me.”

He kissed you then, not caring about the reaction from the rest of the Avengers, which was a mix of whoops and groans. Even when you broke away from each other, you still stood there for a minute, just gazing at each other. The look in your eyes said everything that words couldn’t.

“Well then, what are we waiting for? Let us party,” Loki announced.

He swept you onto the dance floor as the music began to play, enjoying waltzing amongst your friends. After a few songs, you led him over to the thrones at the front of the room. He nearly cried tears of joy when you said it was for him. Long ago, he’d given up on the notion that he’d rule, let go of the desire to do so. He did not need it if he was king of your heart. But to be offered one, even just for the night, it meant more to him than he knew how to express.

It was late into the night after a number of Avengers had moved past tipsy and into drunk, when Loki asked you take a walk with him. You bundled up before stepping into the cold night air, but afraid of his little mortal catching a cold, Loki draped an extra cloak on your shoulders. It was so soft you wondered if he’d cast some kind of spell on it. He took your hand and led you away from the Tower and into the city, lit up even more than normal by all the Christmas decorations. Eventually, you reached Central Park, and Loki slowed to a stop so he could cup your cheeks and kiss you yet again that night. You lost yourself in him, losing track of time as you stood there, lips locked together. When you finally separated, he was looking at you like you were the most precious thing in the world.

“My sweetest angel, thank you so much for cheering me up,” he said.

“It was no problem. It was totally worth it to see you so happy. Did I miss anything that you were looking forward to?”

“Darling, you simply must stop worrying yourself. The party was amazing.”

“But?”

“Did it sound like there was a 'but' coming? I assure you, you have done everything perfectly.”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “I just feel in my gut that there’s something missing, and I know you won’t tell me of your own accord. Please, Loki, if there’s something else, let me know.”

“Admittedly, there is one other thing I miss. But you have done more than enough already.”

“Will you please stop that?” you snapped a little, surprising the god. “Stop pushing your feelings aside, especially with me. I care about you, ok? I want to trouble myself with what’s bothering you. Because if we deal with it together, it’s not so hard for either of us. We love each other, Loki, I know that. So just open up. Tell me.”

“Are you done?” he inquired with an impressed and amused smirk as you nodded, a little flustered and embarrassed after your outburst. “Good.”

Once more, Loki kissed you, catching you completely by surprise. Usually he liked to show his love through little things, but tonight he couldn’t seem to keep his lips off yours. Not that you were complaining, of course. The displays of affection were certainly as welcome out in public as they behind closed doors. You tenderly caressed his cheek and brushed a lock of hair from his eyes.

“The Yule log,” he said. “It was the one night a year I felt like we were truly a family. Father, mother, Thor, and I would sit around the fire into the late hours of the night, laughing and telling stories.” He zoned out for a second and you let him reminisce before continuing. “I remember when I was just a small child, father even let me fall asleep on his lap sometimes. And then as we got older and things became more tense, there was still always that night.”

“Loki,” you whispered, “that’s lovely. I would love to light a Yule log for our little family, if you’ll allow it.”

“I would love nothing more, my angel.”

Then you excitedly whisked him back to the Tower, where you promptly told everyone the plan. They gathered around, and Loki conjured a log which you lit together. You snuggled with your prince in an oversized chair, safely tucked under his arm.

“My angel,” he whispered, “I really cannot thank you enough. And I vow to be more open with you from now on. Because I trust you and love you more than anything else in the Nine Realms and beyond.”

“You’re welcome, Loki. I love you, too, though I never could say it as eloquently as you can,” you chuckled. “Happy Yule, my love.”

“Happy Yule, darling.”

You began to doze off against his side. Loki listened to the conversation and laughter flowing all around him. Soon, everyone followed your lead and began drifting off to sleep. He smiled as he realized he got to keep his favorite tradition of sitting around the Yule log with his family, after all.

“Happy Yule, mother,” he whispered into the night before falling asleep, too.

[obx-adventures]

The Fall

Summary: Grace just moved from Figure Eight to the Cut. She never expected to run into her old friend, Kiara, and discover she lives next door to JJ Maybank.

Catch up here: Ch 1, Ch 2, Ch 3

——

Chapter 4

“Dude, what the hell just happened?” John B asks when he and Pope find JJ still rooted to the spot where Grace left him. JJ has been trying to decide whether or not to follow her. He knows she’ll be pissed but he also knows that she shouldn’t be walking home alone when she’s as drunk as she is.

“Fuck it. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” JJ runs in the direction that Grace left as Pope and John B call out for him.

JJ finds Grace sitting on a makeshift flower box about 10 minutes later. She had stopped walking before getting to their block, JJ’s voice echoing in her head. At the sound of his footsteps, she jumps and tries to gather her stuff to run.

“Whoa whoa whoa, it’s just me.” Grace sags in relief when she recognizes JJ’s voice. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I know you told me not to follow you but –”

He was cut off by Grace throwing herself into him and wrapping her arms around his torso. He follows her lead and holds her tightly as she starts to cry.

“I’m so sorry, JJ.” He shushes her as he rubs her back. “No, I was so horrible to you.”

“Don’t worry about it. I bring that out in people.” Grace chuckles a little into his chest and he closes his eyes in relief. “But you got to tell me what that was all about, sweetheart. I’ve been worried about you since I picked you up from work and then that thing you said about being no one’s responsibility. What happened?”

“JJ… can we talk about this tomorrow?” JJ pulls back a little to look at her face and can see how exhausted she looks. He’s seen the same look in the mirror after bad days with his dad. She’s holding on by a thread.

“Sure, sweetheart. Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

“No!” JJ’s stunned by her emphatic answer. “I can’t go home.”

“Your mom probably isn’t awake, you won’t get in trouble.” JJ forgot this is the first time that Grace has been drunk. But from what he saw yesterday, he doubts Amanda Porter will be aware enough to realize her daughter is just as drunk as her.

“It’s not that. I just… please. Please can we go somewhere else?” Now JJ understands this is a whole different issue. He’s pretty sure it has something to do with her dad but decides not to push it.

“Well we’re pretty far from the Chateau already, do you think you can walk for another 30 minutes?”

“No…” Grace chews on her lip and sways a little. JJ is positive he’s never seen someone so cute. He places his hands on her shoulders to steady her, trying to remember that she needs a friend right now, not a guy that can only think about how adorable she looks.

“Then your house it is.”

“What about yours?” JJ’s eyes widen in surprise at Grace’s suggestion.

“You would rather face my abusive, alcoholic father than your sleeping mom?”

“JJ…”

“What if I stayed with you and ran interference so you don’t see her?” Grace freezes up at the suggestion and can’t help thinking about how she fell asleep with his hand stroking her cheek. She giggles at the thought and her cheeks flush in embarrassment.

“Yea, I guess that would be ok.” She continues to giggle as she turns away from him to walk home.

“What’s so funny?” JJ caught the pink tinge in her cheeks before she turned around and is desperate to know what caused it.

Grace decided not to answer as she stumbled ahead of him. After almost tripping a few more times, JJ steps in front of her and crouches a bit so she can jump on his back. When she hesitates for a second, he looks back at her and winks. She giggles again and awkwardly jumps up for a piggy back ride.

When they get to her house, she tries to unlock her door but can’t steady herself enough to get the key in the lock. JJ takes over and leads her inside. Despite being drunk, her first instinct is to check on her mom.

Grace finds Amanda passed out with another empty bottle of alcohol next to her. JJ waits outside her mom’s room, watching her closely. As Grace’s knees buckle and a sob escapes her, JJ swoops in to pick her up and carry her to her room. He sits on her bed and holds her against his chest, rocking slowly and running his fingers through her hair.

“What happened, sweetheart?” he asks after she finally settles down.

“She lied to me for my whole life. They both did. He finally told me the truth today. But he doesn’t want me. And she’s a mess. And I feel so fucking alone.”

“What did they lie about?”

“He’s not... he’s... not... my...” Grace tries time to calm her sobs enough to talk but JJ understands. He soothes her and tells her she doesn’t need to say anything else.

“I’m so sorry, Grace.” He can’t imagine how much it hurt her to find out Paul isn’t her real father. For a moment, he isn’t sure what else to say but then he remembers their conversation in the kitchen the night before. “I know it feels like it but you aren’t alone. Remember? We can take care of each other. Ok?”

Grace gives him a watery smile and nods a little at him. She reaches her hand out and brushes his hair off his forehead. Instead of pulling her hand back, she leaves it on his cheek and is surprised when he leans into it. They stay like that for what feels like an eternity, just staring into each other’s eyes.

JJ’s phone beeps, causing them both to jump a little. Grace awkwardly moves off his lap and runs into the bathroom to clean herself up. After washing her face and brushing her teeth, she decides she can’t put off going back into her room. When she does, she finds him in the same spot as before.

“Hi...” Grace isn’t sure what else to say after whatever it was that just happened between them.

“Uh, Kie was just checking to make sure you’re ok...” Grace giggles at JJ’s awkwardness. At least she isn’t the only one thrown off kilter. “Uh, we should... umm, we should get some sleep.”

Grace nods at JJ but doesn’t move from her spot leaning against the door. She’s trying to decide what to do next. She’s never been a risk taker but she’s also never felt this way about someone. As if her body is acting on it’s own accord, she moves to stand in front of JJ. He looks perplexed and nervous, two words Grace never thought she would associate with him. She gently runs one hand through his hair and places the other on his opposite cheek.

“What are you doing?” JJ’s voice is barely a whisper.

“Something I’ve wanted to do for the past 3 weeks...”

JJ stares into Grace’s eyes as he reaches up to move her hands away from his face and hair.

“Grace, you’re drunk... I think we should just lay down and get some sleep.” He releases her hands and fights to ignore the pain and embarrassment written all over her face as he stands up to walk past her.

When he gets to the bathroom, he curses himself as he splashes cold water on his face. What the hell was that? If Kie hadn’t texted him, he’s sure he would have kissed Grace. And he wanted to now when she stood in front of him. But he was able to remind himself while she was in the bathroom that she’s drunk and reeling from finding out about her dad. He knows he’s an asshole but not a big enough asshole to take advantage of her while she’s in this state. JJ pulls himself together and goes back into Grace’s room.

He finds Grace curled up into a ball on the same side of the bed she was last night. He can see her body shaking and is sure she’s crying again. But he doesn’t know what to do now.

After getting into bed, he reaches over to touch her shoulder but she flinches away from him. Fuck, did he just totally screw everything up between them?

“Do you want me to go?”

Grace shakes her head no but refuses to turn around to face him. JJ understands this is the best he can hope for. He falls asleep thinking about how he will make things right between them tomorrow.

——

Grace wakes up with a horrendous headache. She rolls over to see JJ still asleep beside her. As she looks at his peaceful face, she cringes at the memory of his rejection last night. How could she be so stupid? Why would JJ Maybank be interested in her?

She slowly gets out of bed, trying desperately not to wake him up. As she stands under the hot water in the shower, she tries to piece together what happened last night. She’s a little impressed with herself for punching Rafe but can’t believe how she acted with JJ. He probably thinks she’s pathetic. Grace is jolted out of her self-pity when she hears the door open.

“Sorry, Grace, I just really need to pee.” Grace’s whole body stiffens in rage at the sound of her mom’s voice.

“Get out!”

“I’m sorry to burst in like this but you’ve been in here for 40 minutes and I couldn’t hold it anymore.”

Grace grinds her teeth in frustration. She needs to talk to her mom but she wants to be able to see her face when she asks her for the truth. Amanda leaves the bathroom and Grace quickly finishes her shower. When she gets back to her room, JJ is still snoring. She decides to deal with one emotionally painful situation at a time and leaves him asleep to go find her mom.

“Mom, we need to talk.” Amanda is making coffee in the kitchen so Grace sits at the table to wait for her.

“Ok, what’s up?” Amanda is certain that Grace wants to talk about her drinking. She knows it’s gotten bad and Grace has had to take care of her a lot lately.

“I saw dad yesterday.” Amanda can see how angry Grace is and is worried about where this conversation is going.

“Oh? How did that go?”

“Not great, mom. He told me he’s not my biological father.” Amanda flinches at Grace’s words and that’s enough confirmation for Grace. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“I didn’t want to hurt you, sweetie.” Amanda reaches over to take Grace’s hand and is hurt when Grace pulls her hands away. “Plus, it doesn’t really change anything. Paul knew I was pregnant before we got married. He knew he wasn’t your father but he still signed your birth certificate. Legally, that makes him your dad. My lawyer says-”

“Shut up!” Grace yells. “I don’t give a shit about the legal crap! And it changes everything! The man I consider my dad doesn’t want anything to do with me! And he never has. All these years, I thought I had done something wrong. That it was my fault that he never spent time with me. All my life, I’ve felt like I wasn’t good enough, that I didn’t deserve his or anyone else’s love.”

“Oh sweetie, no-”

“Stop, I don’t want to hear anything you have to say. You’re just as bad as he is. I knew I had to talk to you right away this morning because you won’t be sober much longer. You’ve been drunk by noon every day since we moved here. I had to get a job to pay our rent and buy groceries so we don’t starve. I’ve always been more of the adult in our relationship but now I can’t count on you at all. And... and I can’t trust you anymore.”

“Grace, that’s not fair.” Amanda knows that everything her daughter said is true but it doesn’t make it any less painful.

Grace storms into her room, too disgusted with her mother and too hurt to talk anymore. After slamming her door, she sinks to the ground and cries into her hands. She doesn’t hear JJ walk over to her over the sound of her own sobs. When he touches her shoulder, she jumps but quickly grabs onto him like a lifeline. He sits down with her and pulls her against his chest, thankful that she’s accepting his comfort.

Twenty minutes later, Grace’s tears have dried and her breathing has returned to normal. She looks up at JJ and is reminded of what happened between them last night. She sits up and releases him.

“Thank you, JJ. And... and I want to apologize... I was really drunk last night. I didn’t... I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I hope it doesn’t change... I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I should have explained-” Grace cuts him off before he can go on.

“You don’t need to explain. I get it.” Grace stands up and puts as much distance as she can between them, desperately trying to avoid hearing how someone else important to her doesn’t want her. “Kiara will be here any minute. I think my mom is back in her room so you should go now before she sees you.”

JJ stares at Grace but she stubbornly avoids looking at him. After a minute of awkward silence, JJ walks towards her and stops in the doorway, trying to get her to meet his gaze. Grace finally looks him in the eyes but before he can talk, he hears Kiara honk to let Grace know she’s there. As they walk outside, he stops her before she gets in the car.

“Can I walk you home after work?”

“Uh, no. I’ll ask Kiara for a ride.”

“Please, I want to talk about this.” Grace looks down at her hands and JJ can practically hear her thinking through excuses. He gently turns her face to look at him and holds eye contact. “Please.”

Grace nods and quickly gets into Kiara’s car before he can say anything else. Kiara is staring at JJ through the passenger window, clearly confused about their exchange. He walks away quickly before Kiara has a chance to say anything to make this more awkward.

“Shit...” Grace cringes at the tone in Kiara’s voice. “What the hell was that?”

Ch 5

Taglist: @agirlwholovescoffee @alexa-playafricabytoto @mendesmaybank @teamnick @laurenyee09 @prejudic3 @teaheeee @shy-1234 @rudyismymanperiod @teaparadiso @rudy-pankow

[fandom-necromancer]

Feral for each other 2

This was prompted by a lot of people on discord, I hope I haven't forgotten anyone: @sv926, Lupo, Skye Willows, chowbot, sunkiller44, Ravyn SilverShadow, DesiredPerfection and @amarytha Hope you enjoy the more quiet second part!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900 [Part1]

As they laid in bed not much later, covered by thick blankets and encased in each other’s arms, it felt like a crime to disturb the silence. What had happened that day lingered between them, the words unspoken weighing them down and threatening to break the peace once voiced and made reality. Nines would rather just stay silent and continue to hold Gavin in his arms and feel his hands hold him, too. And the human seemed to have the same idea. Nines shifted a little and studied Gavin’s face, relaxed and half asleep. At his movements, the man opened his eyes and just watched him back; aware of his staring and that there was more than just adoration prompting him to do so.

The android retracted a hand from Gavin’s chest and instead used it to hold the cheek he wasn’t lying on. The human hummed at the contact and closed his eyes with a long exhale. Nines extended his thumb to brush over the scar on the bridge of his nose and his eyes quickly lost focus, taking in the information of his sensors as a whole. He continued to brush his thumb back and forth the scar as his other hand traced the scars on his back until he could feel his heartbeat through his ribs. He listened to it for a little while, then clenched his eyes shut as if in pain, retracting his hands and pulling out of Gavin’s hug.

‘Nines? Nines, love, what’s wrong?’ Gavin’s hands tried to reach out for him again, but he just sat up, evading them. The human sighed and sat up too. ‘Nines, please. Talk to me.’ ‘You are still alive’, Nines whispered with almost undetectable static underneath his voice. ‘You are still alive. They couldn’t kill you. I saved you.’ ‘You did’, Gavin confirmed. ‘You saved me and I’m still alive.’ ‘But I killed people. There would have been other ways to save you, but I blanked out and I killed.’ ‘Listen Nines’, Gavin tried. ‘This mission went wrong, hell it was already going to shit when they found out Allen’s real identity. Mistakes happen.’ ‘That’s not it’, Nines said desperately, hands clawing at his head. ‘Gavin, no matter how I look at it, there is no regret I killed them. I know there had been other ways, but you are safe now. You are safe and that’s all that matters to me. But that is wrong. I should-‘ ‘Shhh’, Gavin shushed him. ‘Nines. Nines, c’mere.’ He pushed himself over to the android and leaned against his side. He took it as a good sign that he didn’t do anything to stop him when he hugged him from the side.

‘Nines, that’s normal. At least for human standards. I don’t blame you and I’m sure neither would anyone else.’ ‘But I’m blaming myself’, Nines sighed. ‘I should feel something. I killed them.’ ‘No, you didn’t. I saw it. It was your soldier protocol taking over. That’s not you.’ Nines shook his head once again and pushed out of Gavin’s embrace to look at him. ‘Gavin, that’s me. This is who I am, I can’t change it. I come with this… problem, there is no me without it. Enough emotional turmoil and that’s who I become: inhuman, entirely machine and a ruthless killer.’ ‘And you think I am any different?’, Gavin asked. ‘Have you seen me? I just punched a Federal Agent several times because he was racist towards someone I love.’ ‘That’s not the same, Perkins is still alive.’ ‘For now’, Gavin huffed and that at least managed to make Nines chuckle despite everything.

‘Gavin, I appreciate the sentiment, but it doesn’t help. I love you. Seeing you in danger just triggers the killer to take over and I have no control then. I could have killer innocents. Hell, I could have killed our own people. Had you been hurt, I could have killed the paramedics trying to help you.’ Nines sighed deeply. ‘I don’t know if I can X with my consciousness working a job where I will see you in danger quite often.’ ‘Well, I think Fowler will have us on deskwork anyways for a while’, Gavin joked. ‘Not what I meant and you know it.’

The human next to him sighed. ‘Yeah, I know, but what else can I say? That you should quit your job? I know you love it. You said it often enough: this is the perfect way of challenging your advanced systems and doing good.’ ‘But I’m more of a threat than a helpful tool to do good.’ ‘Not a tool’, Gavin reminded him with warning undertone. ‘And you may be a risk, but not a threat. Hell, Nines everyone makes mistakes. In five years, you did two. But so did I! Letting myself get captured twice? In your logic I’m at fault too then. And I highly doubt I deserved to die for that or lose my job. Shit happens. We can only try to do better next time.’

But Nines seemed too riled up to listen. ‘When will you finally understand I am not human?’, he near shouted. ‘I can’t try to do better. I know for certain I will react exactly the same should something like this happen again.’ ‘Then I will do better for both of us!’, Gavin called back, fed up with Nines’ self-pity. ‘You said yourself there is no way of eliminating errors.’ ‘Oh, phck you, Nines. If you just want me to listen, say so. If you want my help, don’t find excuses why it doesn’t apply to you! I know you are a machine! I know you are not human. I don’t care. You are still a person. And a person can always change. You already proofed that by being this troubled about the whole ordeal, when you were designed to be like that full time. If you want to quit police work, fine. I will still see you at home and I fully support you. But before you do so, give me one good reason besides being stuck in a thought spiral. I somehow doubt that you wouldn’t react the exact same way would you not work at the DPD and I was in danger. And I won’t quit this job, so that will happen someday.’ He sighed deeply, knowing they were both arguing about something they would solve that day or even that week.

He deflated and reduced his voice to a soft murmur: ‘Isn’t it better to do this together? So I can be there and help you should you lose control again?’ A wave of relief washed over him as he felt Nines’ shoulder press into his side at that. ‘Maybe’, the android admitted. ‘I think you are the only person in this world to stop me should it ever happen again, considering you at least partially caused it both times.’ Gavin’s huff ended in a groan at Nines’ hint of a smile. ‘Getting confident again?’ ‘Not really. Depends on whether Fowler allows us both to continue working as Detectives after me slaughtering half a gang to protect you and you punching Perkins bloody to protect me.’ ‘Come on, I’m safe on that and Allen’s fine, so you are probably fine, too’, Gavin waved the issue away, but his tone suggested he wasn’t too sure about that himself.

‘If you are right, we both owe Fowler big time’, Nines remarked, snuggling closer to Gavin already. ‘Oh, yeah, that will come to bite us in the ass someday’, Gavin agreed with only slight worry as he was sinking back against Nines, exhausted from one of the shittier days of his life, but happy to still have the chance to just lie here. Next to the love of his life.

[takayatweets]

Find your Fruits Basket Fortune!

In honor of Tanabata and Natsuki Takaya’s birthday, a short Fruits Basket fortune telling quiz was released on twitter!

I have translated the questions and the corresponding fortunes below, but please make sure to also check the original Japanese version to show your appreciation to the creators!  (once the link has opened press the purple button, and use the Japanese below to select your wish. Underneath the fortunes you can find high resolution downloads of the new ending song images). 

Select a wish:

1. 大切な人が幸せになれますように

   For your special person to become happier

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

2. 大好きな人と仲直りできますように

   To heal your relationship with a loved one

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

3. 大事なときに勇気が出ますように

   To gain courage while doing something important

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

4. 会いたい人に会えますように

  To be able to see your special person

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

5. 勉強や仕事で成果が上がりますように

  To get good results in work or education

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

6. 毎日楽しく暮らせますように

   To live joyfully each day

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

7. 悩みが解決しますように

   To find a solution to your worries

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

8. 大好きな人と一緒にいられますように

  To be with the person who you love

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

9. みんなが笑顔でいられますように

  To help everybody to live with a smile

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

10. 自分に自信が持てますように

   To become more self-confident 

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

11. おいしい��のが食べられますように

  To be able to eat something delicious

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

12. 仕事がうまくいきますように

  To have success at work

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

13. 素敵な出会いがありますように

   To have a fated encounter

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

14. なりたい自分になれますように

  To become the person who you dream of becoming

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

15. 欲しいものが手に入りますように

  To obtain the object that you want

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

16.みんなの願いが叶いますように

  To wish for all others’ wishes to be granted

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

Match the number of the wish to the corresponding fortune:

1.  For your special person to become happier

Right now, your heart is peaceful and quiet like the calm that evening-time brings. Just as you are wishing for a loved one to become happier, that special person of yours is also wishing for your happiness. Gather your courage and take that first step forward. It is only a short time until your dream is realized.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Each night before sleeping, think of one thing that you enjoyed about your day.

Lucky item: An orange scrunchy.

Lucky destination: The Southwest.

The next person to reach out to: A woman with long hair. 

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

2. To heal your relationship with a loved one

The pouring of rain upon your heart will soon ease up. Just as you are wishing, the other person too will soon come to wish that your relationship will heal. Please try to convey your feelings honestly. The two of you will be tied by an even stronger bond.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: On a day when the weather is good, take time to look out of a window as far as you can.

Your lucky item: A cheesy pizza.

Lucky destination: The Northeast.

The next person to reach out to: Someone with a particular skill set.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

3. To gain courage while doing something important

You are the type of person to handle any task with an earnest attitude. Rather than spending time fooling yourself, try to face the challenge head on. This is not something that can be done by just anyone. The courage to achieve this is in your own hands.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Grow some potted flowers.

Your lucky item: A mug.

Lucky destination: Northeast.

The next person to reach out to: A woman who laughs often.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

4.To be able to see your special person

Your wish of reaching your special person is being fulfilled, just as if the strings of fate are being pulled.  As you begin to take the first steps forward, the strength that the sting pull at you will increase. In the near future, your person will begin to be pulled in by the strings.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Be forward with revealing your dreams and ambitions.

Your lucky item: A checked handkerchief. 

Lucky destination: The West.

The next person to reach out to: An active woman.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

5. To get good results in work or education

You must fix your gaze firmly upon the path on which you are to proceed. The efforts that you are putting in daily will be realized, and you will be satisfied with the outcome that you achieve. The key to success is to always envision one tier higher than your ideal. It is likely that after a short while you will realize that your very first goal has been cleared. 

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Write something freely, but with care.

Your lucky item: An academic book.

Lucky destination: The Southeast

The next person to reach out to: An artisan.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

6. To live joyfully each day

You are a person with both a gentle personality and a wide field of view. Once you have had a variety of experiences, you will be able to relieve the weight from your shoulders and arrive at a more comfortable and pleasant lifestyle. You will surround others with an aura of soft gentleness, and exude the power to heal others. It may be the case that your wish has already been answered, without you even knowing it.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: In the morning, open your curtains wide and say a hearty ‘good morning’ to the world.

Your lucky item: Pasta

Lucky destination: South-Southeast.

The next person to reach out to: A strong-willed woman.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

7. To find a solution to your worries

Right now, you may feel as if you are walking through a dimly lit tunnel. However, it is futile to worry about such things. For every tunnel always has an exit, and once you arrive at the exit prepare yourself to be bestowed with blessings. You already have the ticket to reach your goal.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish:  Write the name of someone you love.

Your lucky item: A rose scented bath bomb.

Lucky destination: The South.

The next person to reach out to: Someone who is good at singing and playing instruments.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

8. To be with the person who you love

You are a being of plentiful emotion and gleaming sensitivity. Whether you are going through hard times or sorrowful times you are able to crush the negativity into beautiful diamonds. Even when you are separated from your loved one, your hearts are together. You are reaching your loved one with your outstretched arms.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Say “Thank you” and “Sorry”.

Your lucky item: A dotted notebook.

Lucky destination: South-southwest.

The next person to reach out to: A girl younger than yourself.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

9. To help everyone to live with a smile

You are the owner of a heart that has feelings as deep as the ocean. You place your own heart under strain in the efforts of helping others, and as you silently exert yourself, you are giving more strength to the people around you than you know.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: After washing your face, look in the mirror and smile at the person reflected back at you.

Your lucky item: A rice ball.

Lucky destination: The north.

The next person to reach out to: A shy boy.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

10. To become more self-confident

You possess a character that reveals your true self when nervous. Use your surroundings to your advantage and your efforts will be realized. Before considering what could go wrong, turn your gaze instead to what you can achieve. It’s all right! Your confidence will most certainly bloom before you.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Stretch your back and take a walk.

Your lucky item: An accessory made of beads.

Lucky destination: West-southwest.

The next person to reach out to: A man with dexterity.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

11. To be able to eat something delicious

Right now, you are someone surrounded by many other kind people. Your days are full of warmth. Meals that you spend with family and friends gives you a special form of enrichment and makes the meal taste even better. Be careful not to overeat, though!

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Decorate the entrance to your home with flowers.

Your lucky item: A smartphone case.

Lucky destination: The East.

The next person to reach out to: Someone who is good at talking.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

12. To have success at work

You have a lot of ambition and a small dash of greed. You imagine the world in an entirely different way to anyone else, and are planting your own two feet firmly in the history of that world. The variety of your character is a treasure beyond any other. So long as you remember this you will most certainly arrive at your goal.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Take the time to imagine what your ideal perfect day after your wish has been granted looks like.

Your lucky item: A crossword puzzle.

Lucky destination: The West-Northwest.

The next person to reach out to: Someone who shares your hobbies.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

13. To have a wonderful encounter

Your heart overflows with purity and a glistening inquisitiveness. You receive even the most meager daily occurrence with your whole heart, and are absorbing the light and hope within the world. In the close future you will be blessed with a meeting that will pierce through your heart.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Take your favorite photographs or images and go for a walk.

Your lucky item: Fluffy slippers.

Lucky destination: North-Northwest.

The next person to reach out to: A quiet woman.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

14. To become the person who you dream of becoming

Right now you are certainly facing a turning point in your life. Just as a caterpillar becomes a butterfly, the time has come for you to be reborn into a new self. Your new self will be granted wings of freedom, and can reach wherever you may want to go.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Keep it in mind to raise the corners of your smile when you speak.

Your lucky item: A picture of the great outdoors.

Lucky destination: The North.

The next person to reach out to: A teacher from your school days.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

15. To obtain the object that you want

Right now your heart is as true and as free of impurity as that of a newborn child. If you take just one target within your sights, then you will most certainly achieve what you want. Rather than rush into things, first consider your issue in its entirety before moving forward.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Raise both hands towards the sun in the morning.

Your lucky item: Something with the scent of lavender. 

Lucky destination: The Northwest.

The next person to reach out to: A boy who likes adventure.

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ ‎

16. To wish for all others’ wishes to be granted

Right now, your heart is as perfectly clear as a water fountain.You are able to conquer any hurdle, and are in possession of a strong spirit and enriched heart. You are blessed with an abundance of love. The thoughts of yourself and of your loved ones melt together, and it looks like there is a miracle waiting to occur in your close future.

A hint to help you fulfill your wish: Fold laundry with care.

Your lucky item: A pink ribbon.

Lucky destination: The Southeast.

The next person to reach out to: A female friend.