#the great IKEA game

[batsandbugs]

Bruce Wayne's Headache Class. System: Sneak Peak 1

“I insist he assigns the blame to me,” grumbles Damian, his mouth twisted in a frustrated frown. “He refuses. The entire scheme was my idea, down to the very verbage used, and yet he still continues to blame Marinette, and refers to her in an uncouth, slanderous manner.  If he continues to insist upon said belligerent name calling I will be taking matters into my own hands and he will find himself contending with my blade.” 

Bruce blinks at the hissed statement. It’s vicious, it’s descriptive, and it wouldn’t be out of place if Talia had said it. The pit of anxiety in his stomach triples. “Against your own brother?” he forces himself to ask, even though he’s pretty sure he knows the answer. 

“I would sell him to Satan for one corn chip,” Damian says, face totally blank, tone serious. Bruce can’t tell if he’s joking or not. “Marinette has done nothing to deserve his name calling. It was a trick, he fell for it, and they lost. He can dislike her.” Damian rolls his eyes and huffs. “Even if I think it is a childish grudge, but the insults will cease or I will make him cease.”

(I swear I'm going to get this damn chapter completed. It's just fighting me. Here's a little something to prove I'm not dead!)

[artemisiasthings]

The Great IKEA Game by @batsandbugs

She’s done. My first bind. 🤌🏼 I’m so proud of this book and I cannot believe I made this with my own two hands!!!!

The story is incredible, The Great IKEA Game is a fic I come back to time and time again when I need a pick me up so it was a no brainer to choose this as my first bind. It’s the perfect length and I know I’m going to be eternally grateful to have it in my shelves if society collapses and the apocalypse comes 😂

I learned so much throughout this process about typesetting, materials, graphic design, conservation-grade techniques, and everything else that goes into making a finished, readable book. I wouldn’t have such a beautiful finished project without the incredible support and tutorials from creators on instagram and TikTok! I was blessed to find an answer for any question that came up either through existing videos or through kind responses to my frantic 3 am insta stories.

Needless to say, having a physical book that I CREATED WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS is fueling my god complex and I cannot wait to bind even more 😈

Progress Posts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

[addictreaderr]

Yeah that sounds like the Wayne boys alright

@batsandbugs

[unsupervised-meatsuit]

I just got back from an IKEA trip with my family, and the whole time while we were there I kept thinking about this fic. The constant "Hey, I could fit in that fridge!" Or "I could totally slide through the center of that shelf table thing in a chase scene" was seriously entertaining, and I also managed to convince my mom to give it a shot. I am now rereading the whole series so far and vibrating with excitement for The Great Gotham Sewer Race.

the great ikea games anyone?

[diekerel]

I've got a new PC coming in the next week or so, my first proper gaming PC (I've only had laptops and tablets up to now), so i bought a new desk.

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

5 & 6 with Dorothy, Blanche, and Rose for the fmk alternatives ask game! (Which looks really fun, by the way!)

Aaa I know, right?? Lots of fun!! Thanks for the questions! :)

5. go on a six hour road trip with (no car radio, you choose who drives), sit next to on a six hour plane flight, sit across from on a six hour train journey

This one is not easy, haha. I love traveling, but only if I can do my own thing while moving around 😅 so company isn't ideal, in general! That being said, let's see...

I think I'd take Rose on a six hour road trip, if there's no car radio available. I know, I know -- it's not ideal, but when I'm driving I usually need to listen to something to keep my brain entertained enough to stay focused, and if one of the trio can talk/sing for a full 6 hours, that's certainly Rose. At some point I'd stop actively listening to her and just pretend I'm listening, I think, but it would still be helpful -- and if I get tired of driving, I'm sure I could ask her to swap with me and she'd be happy to help!

I think I'd sit across from Blanche on a train trip, for the very practical reason that she's short and that would give me some more space for my legs 😂 If we already knew each other before the trip, I'm sure we'd manage to find something to chat about, even if maybe not for the whole six hours. If she was alone and a stranger, considering my track record I'd probably offer to help her with her luggage, and then keep my mouth shut and text my friend about the gorgeous lady that just sat in front of me on the train, haha.

I ended up with Dorothy and a plane flight by exclusion, but that sounds great, honestly! I'm sure she'd be very respectful, mindful of her and everyone else's space and tranquillity. I figure she'd have a book to read on the trip, and if so we might end up comparing books and sharing our impressions. :)

6. go clothes shopping with, go to ikea with, go grocery shopping with

Hmm... alright, I think I'd go clothes shopping with Rose. I don't much enjoy shopping and I get frustrated very quickly when I have to buy clothes, so it would be lovely to have someone as patient and caring as Rose is to comfort me and keep me company while I try stuff on. I'd treat her to something tasty and sweet to thank her afterwards, of course. :)

Blanche is the best among the trio at interior design, but her taste seems to be way more expensive than ikea 😅 besides, I usually have very strong opinions about what I like and dislike when it comes to furniture, so I think we'd just end up clashing! I'd much rather have someone who points out the practical aspects of the pieces I like (stuff like 'will I manage to take this home and build it' or 'do I have enough space for this' or 'is this actually the thing I need or do I just think it's pretty'), and Dorothy is perfect for that. :)

That leaves Blanche for grocery shopping! It's nothing glamorous per se, but I bet she'd make it into a great experience -- she must have an anecdote for just about anything she buys! I might have to keep track of what she gets just to stay within budget, but we'd manage, eventually (I hope!). Although I'm sure she'd convince me to take her out to dinner afterwards. 😅

[fmk alternatives]

[phagodyke]

once again saved by elden ring 🙏

[intrepidacious]

almost believing

summary: You and Bucky aren't exactly on speaking terms at the moment. That doesn't mean you're getting out of having to pretend to be married for a mission.

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

word count: 5.4k

warnings: miscommunication dialled up to eleven bc it's me; friends to lovers with lots of seething in between; set around christmas, but not a christmas fic; slight spoiler warning for wakanda forever just to be safe

please note that my blog is rated 18+. minors dni. ageless/empty blogs will be blocked without warning.

prompt: fake dating, baby 😌 title and initial inspiration for this fic were taken from "so close" from enchanted. yes. that scene.

a/n: this was written for my wonderful tiff's sweet as sugar writing challenge!! @traitorjoelite i'm so proud of you and i hope you enjoy this fic. i really thought this one would be short i swear. big shoutout and thank you to @sweetascanbee for listening to me rant about this for weeks, i appreciate you so much!!

masterlist | read on ao3

Here’s the thing: It’s supposed to be a simple mission. Just gathering intel at the hotel for one single night, the two of you pretending that everything is fine for a couple of hours more.

After all, it’s Bucky’s last mission with you before his reassignment goes through.

Well, it’s not like it’s going to make a difference to how much you’re seeing him, to be honest.

You’re not sure when he started making himself rare or why, but once you noticed it, it was impossible not to.

"Sorry, I’m heading out," when you ask him to grab lunch together seems inconspicuous enough, as does, "Ah, I’m already supposed to meet Sam," when you try asking him about that trip to IKEA you’d been talking about for ages.

But it doesn’t stop there. One excuse follows the next, and suddenly there’s always something more important than the two of you hanging out.

Of course, you try to rationalize it at first. Swallow down your hurt feelings, because Bucky is your friend, and sometimes people just need space. You’re fine. The two of you are fine.

Once he starts scheduling dates for Friday night, though—which has always been movie night, always, every week since you met him—you know that something’s wrong.

"Is he angry with me?" you keep asking Steve, who looks very uncomfortable and definitely knows what's going on.

"Just give him a little space," he suggests timidly. So you do. You let the whole thing go.

For like a week.

"I just don’t know what I did," you tell Sam over drinks, your head held in your hands.

"Nope," he answers, downing his dregs. "I’m not doing this. Nuh-uh."

"You know, too?" you cry, accusingly pointing at him.

"I don’t know anything," Sam deadpans. And then he puts his scarf on and leaves.

"Maybe try talking to Bucky about it?" Natasha suggests, either incapable of hiding her amused smile or unwilling to try.

"I would if I ever saw him for longer than a 'hi, how are you' at the gym," you mumble. Fact is, you’re getting pissed about him giving you the silent treatment without even knowing what you did wrong.

Because before this, whatever this is, things were fine. Great, even. Free afternoons were spent on each other’s couches, introducing him to your favorite tv shows and letting him teach you that stupid card game he loves so damn much. You’d even been starting to imagine that there might be something …

Clearly, you were wrong.

Now, you can’t even look at him without your throat closing up. It’s like you woke up a few weeks ago and he’s become an entirely different person around you, much more like he was at the beginning of your friendship, distant and cold.

He didn’t even tell you that he’d signed up for a transfer.

The mission call feels like your last chance.

A whole evening of teamwork and espionage, of him basically having no other choice than talking to you and finally telling you why the fuck he would get himself reassigned without even telling you beforehand. You could’ve hugged Fury for the opportunity.

That is, until you’re handed the file containing your fake identities for the op a few hours before you’re supposed to leave.

"You’re joking," you say as soon as you open the door.

"Great, you’re here as well," Steve says dryly. "Again, a) you both gotta learn how to knock, b) the whole thing wasn’t my idea or my decision, but I also think it’s the best directive for what you’re trying to do, and c) no, there’s no one else available for the mission. Anything I missed?"

Bucky deliberately doesn’t meet your eye, his arms still crossed as he stares Steve down with a look you can’t decipher. He doesn’t even acknowledge you standing in the door, but his foot is doing the tapping thing again.

You purse your lips and join the staring.

Steve sighs, rubbing his temples with the palms of his hands. "Listen, you two work well together and I know these past few weeks have been … strained"—you almost laugh at that—"but it’s just one night."

"We need to pretend we’re married," you say. "How’re we going to pull that off if he can’t stand being in the same room as me?"

"I trust that there won’t be any issues." Steve raises an eyebrow at Bucky as he says that, but of course he doesn’t get a reply. That would necessitate talking in your presence.

"One night," Bucky repeats through gritted teeth.

Not for the first time, there seems to be some sort of silent conversation between the two of them that you’re not privy to. You roll your eyes.

"I’ll see you later."

You leave with your back straight and without a glance over your shoulder, the door slamming shut behind you.

For a moment, you’re tempted to barge into Natasha’s office next, but you have a feeling like she’d just give you another one of her looks again, which really won’t better your mood. So instead, you slam another door and flop onto your bed, blankly staring at the ceiling for a while.

Surely, there’s some twisted sort of irony in this whole situation, but you’re not laughing.

Usually, before a mission, you’d get bagels together from the bakery around the corner. You haven’t done that in a while, but you’re still quietly begging your phone to show a new unread message when you look at the time however long later.

Instead, there’s just your lockscreen picture of Bucky’s grinning face that you can’t bear to get rid off, no matter how many times it stings you. It’s almost a year old, now, back when you’d taken him to go do your holiday shopping with you, insisting that "no one’s gonna recognize you, look at that great cap you’re wearing".

It’d started snowing halfway through the afternoon, and he’d kept reaching for your hand in order not to lose you in the crowd. You both gave up halfway through your list and just went to get coffee instead, strolling through Central Park and talking about nothing and everything.

That’s when you’d realized you'd been falling in love with him, laughing and fingers freezing around your paper cup, a strange new warmth spreading throughout your body.

You need to change your lockscreen.

***

Half an hour before pick-up, you leave your room with a duffle bag slung over your shoulder and almost run into Bucky. He’s leaning against the opposite wall like he’s been waiting for you, and it stings because that’s what he always used to do, back when you were still talking. When you could still pretend that maybe, just maybe, your feelings weren’t quite so hopeless.

Now, though, his easy smile is missing. Instead, an ever-present frown is furrowing his brows again, his mouth opened just a little, but nothing comes out.

"Look, I don’t want to do this any more than you do," you sigh. "But it’s a two-person job."

He nods, his tongue poking his cheek. "I know."

"Do you think you’re gonna be alright with us pretending we’re madly in love for a whole evening?"

Bucky’s jaw tightens. "I’ll be fine."

Of course he’s going to be fine.

You grab the strap of your bag more tightly. "I wish you would just tell me what I did."

"You didn’t do anything." If he’s telling the truth, though, why does he look so numb?

For a moment, you want to shout at him, cry, beg, make him tell you when and how this went wrong, but you don’t. You just stare at him in silence, hoping he’ll get it anyway, and he refuses to notice it.

"So," Bucky finally says. "You ready to get hitched?"

There’s the ghost of a grin in his eyes, and even though it’s not enough to mask the uncomfortable tilt of his shoulders, you sigh. At least he’s trying, you suppose.

"Let’s just get fake-married so we can fake-divorce and go our separate ways," you say, walking past him.

"I’ve got something for you."

You turn around again, raising your eyebrows as he holds up a ring between the fingers of his left hand. There’s a giant stone set in its center, striking and sparkling and not subtle in the slightest. Tony really went all out for appearance’s sake. Your fingers involuntarily tighten around the strap of your bag.

Bucky drops the ring in the palm of your hand.

"Quite the present," you chuckle nervously. You don’t even want to know how much this thing costs, and you feel like they're going to chop off your head if something happens to it.

"Try it on, then."

It’s a bit too large on your finger, and it feels foreign. It’s not you at all. Then again, it’s not supposed to be you.

Before you can say anything, though, Bucky shakes his head. "What?" you say with a roll of your eyes.

"That couldn’t look more fake if you tried. Wait a sec."

He turns his back towards you and rummages through his bag for a while, his jaw still set as he holds out his hand once more. With a sigh, you pull the ring off again and return it, but before you can pull your hand back, he catches it in his own.

This one slides onto your finger perfectly, and your eyes widen at the sight of it. It’s a lot subtler, with only a small emerald for decoration, but it’s so delicate and beautiful it takes your breath away.

Bucky’s mouth opens and closes, but he swallows whatever came to his mind. "That’s better," he says instead, and his voice sounds oddly rough.

"They gave you a backup?" you say, angling your hand this way and that to see how the gem catches the light.

"Mhm."

Something is off about this whole situation, but then you feel like you don’t really know Bucky anymore. Not like you used to, anyway. It used to be so easy to get a read on him.

You stand there in silence for a moment, and it’s only then that both of you realize he’s still holding your hand. He drops it immediately, and you pretend it doesn’t sting.

"How come you don’t get a ring?" you ask.

"Says who?" Bucky says, clearing his throat and activating the camouflage sleeve Tony had installed for his arm. Sure enough, there’s a ring on his hand as well.

You grab his hand curiously. When you touch it, there’s no difference between his fingers and the pseudo-platinum band, all of it just cool vibranium in disguise.

"It’s fake," you say. "It’s not the same."

"No," he agrees and pulls his hand away. "Looks real enough, though."

You notice the red splotches on his neck and wonder what it is that you’ve said this time, but it’s pointless anyway. He’s not going to tell you even if you asked.

Maybe you should be used to him icing you out by now, but it still hurts.

***

"Yes, Steve, I know," you sigh. "We’re just gathering intel, nothing else."

"I just wanted to have you say it again so we’re all clear. You both love taking risks when it’s not necessary."

"Alright, punk, we got it," Bucky says, tugging at his tie again.

You can’t even blame him for the nervous habit; you’ve been twisting your fake wedding ring around your finger for the entire drive.

This isn’t the first time the two of you had to go undercover as a couple; hell, it’s not even the first time you’ve pretended to be married. Usually, though, you could have a laugh about the whole thing together.

Now you barely know how to act around Bucky as yourself, let alone as some made up woman.

"I think we’re going to attract a lot of attention if we don’t get out soon," you say, readjusting the collar of your blouse underneath your coat.

You notice Steve staring at your hand for a moment, a frown between his brows, but his lips curve upwards a split second later. "Ready to do this?" he asks and you smile a little in confirmation.

Bucky takes another breath and then he nods curtly. "Let’s go."

The change that goes through him as soon as the two of you climb out of the car is so stark you almost turn on your heels again and beg Steve to let you off the hook, after all. His hand sneaks around your waist and pulls you closely into his side as you walk towards the hotel, all soft smiles and charm.

"Sorry for the holdup," he tells the bellman waiting next to your bags with a wink. "The missus and I just needed another minute."

You lightly slap Bucky’s chest in fake indignation. It’s quick thinking on his part, really.

When you’re checking in under your assumed names for the evening, he keeps his arm around you, and the content look stays in his eyes. A subtle glance at your surroundings tells you some of your persons of interest have already arrived early for the event tonight, looking around the sparkling lobby with the same feigned boredom.

Bucky nudges your cheek with his nose and then smiles again when you look at him. It makes your brain shut off for a moment.

When he looks at you like this, it’s so easy to forget the past couple of months and just pretend for a moment. What if there was no mission at all, and it could simply be the two of you?

But of course, that’s not possible. All of it is fake, including the way he looks at you. You know that.

So how come it doesn’t feel fake to you at all?

***

You hate this dress, you hate these people, you hate this dinner, and most of all, you hate how much you enjoy spending this much time so physically close to Bucky.

It feels so natural when he links your hand with yours, so fucking meant to be, even though he’s just putting on a show for the band of creeps you’re tasked to keep an eye on.

But damn if he’s not good at it.

It’s amazing, really, how his eyes immediately soften when you turn your head towards him, like you’re the only person in the whole room. He looks at you during this charade like you wish he’d look at you daily, even far from prying eyes around you; especially then. It makes your breath shorten, your heart pounding erratically because it thinks it’s getting everything it’s ever hoped for.

Hearts are often stupid like that.

A full night of glances and touches and the pretence of secret whispers will do all kinds of twisted things to your feelings.

There’s a lull in the conversation, and when Bucky squeezes your hand you realize he’s no longer the only one who’s looking at you.

You chuckle nervously. "I’m sorry, I got … distracted for a moment. What were you saying?"

"Ah, newlyweds," one of the investor goons laughs. He’s a particularly vile looking man whose suit is way too big on his spindly limbs.

Bucky, academy award winning actor in another lifetime, chuckles politely while the fondness in his eyes seems to increase tenfold. "We’ve been married three years, actually," he says, sticking to your official cover story.

It’d been Tony’s idea to keep your fake timeline as close to the truth as possible to avoid any slip-ups. It’s a great move on paper, really, but in reality it just adds another nail to the coffin.

Three years ago, you were on a mission in Brussels, only the second one ever where it was just the two of you. It was mostly surveillance, so one of you usually had downtime while the other kept lookout. It became customary that you’d entertain each other during those long hours, getting to know each other intimately for the first time, taking the first tentative steps towards the friendship you now share.

That mission was the groundwork of your falling in love with him in the first place.

"You seem to be doing something right if you’re both still so enamoured with each other," Spindly Arms says.

"I’m the luckiest guy in the world," Bucky responds, still looking into your eyes. "It’s hard not to do the right thing, then."

He presses a kiss to your cheek and you smile timidly. His lips linger for just a moment, and then he moves to whisper into your ear, something you’re sure looks like sweet nothings to everybody else but is actually a, "Don’t fall asleep on me."

You tilt your head, shove him teasingly as if he’d said something inappropriate, and because he’s always been quick to catch on he winks, obvious enough so that the other people that are part of this conversation can clearly see it.

It’s not long after this that you excuse yourselves, walking around the room with apparent aimlessness. Everything is sparkling with pure gold decorations and countless little twinkling lights that have been scattered around the room like millions of fireflies. You spot an actual orchestra right underneath the massive Christmas tree.

"Kind of tacky, don’t you think?" Bucky murmurs with a sideway glance at you.

"Maybe a little," you say.

The truth is, though, the room looks oversaturated and expensive and magnificent. Something straight out of a Hallmark movie, more like a movie set than a real place.

It’s the one thing that keeps this whole thing from being completely unbearable.

He must have seen the truth in your eyes, because he ducks his head and says quietly, "I’m gonna go check out the terrace."

You just nod and smile as he kisses your cheek again and then vanishes through the crowd with a few long strides. Sighing, you take another drink from the tray a waiter offers you, absent-mindedly rubbing your cheek.

"What a lovely surprise," a voice says next to you and you freeze for a moment before forcing yourself to calmly take a sip. "Miss … Winter, was it?"

"Mrs," you say with a pleasant smile. "Good evening, Director."

"Right, of course." Director de Fontaine eyes her martini warily. "I don’t suppose these olives are fresh, do you?"

Your mind is racing. If she’s here on official business, then your entire operation might be compromised.

"So," she continues, looking rather bored. "Met any interesting people yet, Mrs Winter?"

"Oh, yes," you say lightly, clinging to your role of unassuming young wife. "It’s all rather exciting."

"I’m sure. These kinds of events are all very … shiny." She looks into your eyes and there’s an almost explicit warning written in hers. "It’s surprisingly easy to get blinded."

You swallow heavily even as she smiles. "If you’ll excuse me, I think I see someone …"

You quickly walk over to the buffet table where some of the wives have formed a semi circle of gossip, trying your best to hide your sigh of relief when the director doesn’t follow you.

For a few minutes, you lose yourself in pointless gossip, until one of the women takes hold of your forearm.

"You must tell us, what’s your secret?"

"Excuse me?" you chuckle nervously.

"Your husband!" she exclaims, earning a few nods from some of the others. "He clearly adores you," she goes on. "I don’t think he’s looked away from you once since you joined us."

You steal a look around your shoulder. She’s right. Bucky’s gaze immediately locks with yours, an almost bashful grin on his lips. You caught me, his eyes seem to say, and you feel a rush of heat go through you.

He should be nominated for an Oscar with this performance.

Quickly, you turn around again to meet several expectant pairs of eyes.

"I don’t know what to tell you," you say. "He’s just … always been like this. I mean, he’s my best friend. I really don’t know what I would do without him."

There’s not a word of a lie in what you’re saying, and it elicits a round of coos and murmurs even as your heart gives a sharp pang.

"Dance with me?"

You flinch, turning to look at Bucky’s outstretched hand, at the sad, hopeful look in his eyes, and the line between reality and fiction blurs a bit more.

You take his hand, and he pulls you onto the dance floor, some cheery Christmas song ramping up to its big finale. Then, the band switches to a slower song. To you, it sounds mournful.

"That was nice," Bucky mutters into your ear. "What you said."

"I meant it, you know," you whisper, but he turns, and you don’t think he’s heard you.

Bucky places his hand on your hip and you hide a shudder. His gloved fingers wrap around yours, and then you start moving again.

You barely know the steps, but he’s a great leader, and he doesn’t say anything when you step on his toes. In fact, his gaze softens even more when he looks at you after the third time, the hand around your waist pulling you a little closer.

"How are you doing this?" you say without stopping to smile.

"Easy," Bucky says, and the way he says it almost makes you believe it’s true.

You bite your lip, trying to stop yourself from breathing him in. "I didn’t mean the dancing."

With the last note of the song, you stumble over his foot again and he snorts. "Me neither."

The melody changes and neither of you lets go. His steps are getting slower, smaller, like he’s just trying to keep both of you in motion. Your head is spinning. The twinkling lights are starting to blur into a great mass of stars in the background, like you’re at the center of a music box and everything else is just background noise.

You wrap both hands around his neck as you’re swaying, then, your foreheads only inches apart. You could stay in this moment forever, you think, as it stretches into blissful infinity. Somewhere, a clock strikes ten.

Bucky leans in a little closer and your breath hitches again.

"It’s time," he whispers, and your eyes fly open.

You’d almost forgotten about the mission.

"Val is here," you say quietly.

His expression hardens for just a second. "What?"

"She came to talk to me earlier. She knows we’re here."

"Why didn’t you say something?"

"I … There wasn’t time."

"We’re just gonna have to be quick and discrete."

You open your mouth, but then you see the distance close in again between you two, and so you just nod.

The plan is almost laughably simple, but it’s probably going to work out just as you’ve laid out beforehand. Everyone in the room has watched the two of you staring at each other for the past couple of hours, so no one bats an eye when Bucky nudges you gently and you make your way up the stairs to the fancy elevator that’s going to take you up to a bedroom.

Or, more specifically, to a bedroom that’s being used to store all kinds of evidence, but no one else needs to know that little detail.

You notice the director talking to Spindly Arms and a couple of other people, but you force your gaze not to linger on her. Instead, you grab Bucky’s hand more tightly.

He lets go of you as soon as the elevator doors close behind the two of you, dragging a hand through his hair and messing it up. There aren’t any cameras in the elevator, but you’re both pretty sure there will be on the floor you’re going. "CIA exposure, that’s exactly what we needed."

"There was nothing I could’ve done," you say, tugging your sleeves down your shoulders.

"I’m not blaming you, sweetheart," Bucky says distractedly, loosening his tie. Your heart makes a very heavy thud. "But if Walker shows up tonight as well, I’m gonna shoot first and ask questions later."

"No, you won’t," you say with a grin, mostly because you know he didn’t bring his gun because the male attendees were all frisked at the entrance.

"Maybe I’ll throw a knife. I could say it was an accident."

The conversation lasts barely a moment, but it reminds you so much of what the two of you used to be, it hurts.

You follow him stumbling out of the elevator onto the right floor with a breathless laugh. There’s no one in sight as you subtly check the room numbers before making him follow you with a coquettish smile for the security camera.

You find the right door without much trubble, pulling the keycard out of your inconvenient little handbag. "Come on now," you murmur as the lock rejects it at the first try.

Suddenly, Bucky’s hand is on your waist again, and you gasp as he spins around. The keycard drops to the floor.

He presses you against the wall, effectively trapping you in his embrace. Your hands are laid flat against his chest, his heart thundering madly underneath your fingertips. Bucky’s eyes flit around madly, like he’s trying to come up with something on the spot and, for the first time since you’ve known him, is left without ideas.

You gasp as his nose brushes against yours.

"Sorry," he whispers hoarsely. And then he kisses you.

Your body responds immediately, lighting a fire in your core as his lips press against yours, hungry, gentle, almost apologetic. You can taste the champagne on his tongue.

You arch your back against him on instinct as his hands travel down your arms, brushing your hips, your tighs, slowly parting your dress at the slit. Your eyes fly open the moment you realize what he’s doing, even though he swallows your gasp.

In one smooth motion, he pulls the I.C.E.R. out of the garter on your thigh and fires a single, silenced shot. The guy with the earpiece barely has the time to grunt before he sacks against the opposite wall, unconscious, his hand still in the pocket of his jacket.

"Fuck," you hiss, pushing Bucky away from you. He stumbles slightly, the gun loose in his fingers. His eyes are almost black as he blinks at you. "You could have told me we’re being shadowed."

Bucky’s mouth is stained from your lipstick, and the sight of that alone makes your head swim. You can still feel the ghost of his hand on your leg.

"It’d have blown our cover," he replies, infuriatingly calm. "Hate me later, our window has just narrowed by a bit."

You swallow, blinking to try and gain control over your breath again, grabbing your gun back with a short nod. "Let’s finish this, then."

***

Back at the Compound, you both give an exhausted report about the events of the night, leaving out nothing but your improvised kiss on floor fifteen.

Your lips are still tingling with it.

Finally, you and Bucky are left alone in the briefing room, and for the first time in weeks, he doesn’t just get up and leave as soon as the silence takes hold. Instead, you both sit next to each other, staring straight ahead.

"I guess we should talk," he says slowly, reluctantly, and you can’t help it.

Your defenses shoot up again.

"I don’t know what you’re talking about," you say, squinting.

"Yes, you do." He’s lost the tie hours ago, but he keeps tugging at the fabric in his hands as if it could give him the words he’s looking for. "I shouldn’t have kissed you, not with … Not like that."

"Like you said, the guy would’ve blown our cover," you say, crossing your arms.

"Doesn’t make it right."

"What do you want me to say, Buck?" you say sharply. "That you should’ve talked to me before? Well, I’m kind of used to you not doing that anymore, so just forget it."

"Y/N—"

"No, really, it’s fine. Like I said, you’re leaving, anyway, so what does it matter. Didn’t tell me you were planning to do that, either. You just did it."

"You know why I’m leaving."

"No, I fucking don’t!" There are tears in your eyes now. "I have been trying really hard, Bucky, but you’ve just shut me out. I thought you needed space, which is fine, by the way, but you just—one day you decided you were done with me and that was it."

He stares at you incredulously. "You seriously don’t remember."

"Don’t remember what?!"

"That you were talking about me. To Natasha."

The memory rushes through you so violently it’s almost ridiculous you hadn’t thought about it in months.

You’d just come back from another undercover op, and you’d called her right as the door to your room had closed behind you because not for the first time, your feelings had threatened to spill over again.

"You should talk to him. Be honest."

"No, Nat, come on, I can’t—I can’t do that to him. I can’t risk … you know, he’s my best friend. And that’s all it can ever be. I don’t want to ruin what we have. I just wish he’d make it easier."

"You’re making excuses, you know. Both of you deserve a bit of happiness, don’t you think?"

"I tried," Bucky says now, barely looking at you. "I tried making it easier. But you’re so …"

"So what?" you ask hollowly, ignoring the fact that you can feel the tears starting to trickle down your cheeks now. "So pathetic? That’s what this is about, isn’t it? That’s why you asked for the transfer, so you can be rid of me."

"Rid of you?" Bucky starts, but you ignore him.

"You know what, Bucky, fuck you if you think my feelings for you are so much of an inconvenience that you need to leave the state. Silly me for thinking we could be adults about this."

"You’re the one who wouldn’t just tell me."

"Well, now you know anyway and I’m sure once you’re off to Cairo or wherever the fuck they’re going to send you, you can have a big old laugh about the stupid girl who fell in love with you despite the fact that—"

"Love?"

"I mean, obviously?!"

"You … you’re in love … with me?" There’s something very soft and vulnerable in Bucky’s eyes.

"Are we talking about two different phone calls?"

"I thought you hated me."

You huff incredulously. "Why would I hate you?"

"That’s why I gave you space, I thought … but then …" He grabs your hands. "Sweetheart, I’ve been in love with you for years."

It punches the air out of your lungs. "What?"

Bucky’s eyes are devastating as he looks at you, then. "I’m so sorry, I—I got it all wrong, I was just—I thought you know and you didn’t see me like that and that’s why I …"

"You …?" you say, still not quite comprehending what’s going on.

His thumb caresses your knuckles, halting when it makes contact with the ring you’re still wearing. "I'm in love with you," he says quietly.

"I don’t understand," you whisper.

"Please tell me I didn’t fuck this up completely."

This time, you’re the one to lean in.

Where your first kiss in the hallway had been feverish, this one is soft, almost unbelievably sweet, both of you still breathless with the fact that you’re allowed to do this. Finally, it feels like all the pieces are falling into place and you’re home again.

You press closer into him and Bucky smiles against your lips, pulling you in with his hands on your hips just like he did when you were dancing earlier.

The loudspeakers overhead crackle. "Alright, kids, we’re gonna break this up until you’re back in your own quarters, I don’t want to expose FRIDAY to the creation of your sex tape."

You break up with a snort.

"Fuck you, Tony," Bucky shouts, but he’s still smiling as wide as you’ve ever seen him do.

You giggle as you nudge your nose against his, curling your fingers into his hair. "That reminds me, you know."

"Of what?"

"Quick and discrete," you mumble, repeating his words from the hotel. "Title of your sex tape."

Bucky groans and shuts you up again.

(A few years later, you get the ring back.)

happy holidays, y'all 💛 thank you for reading!! if you want to see more of my writing, check out my masterlist or follow @intrepidacious-fics for update notifications!!

[cottonlemonade]

Masterlist

divider by me 🐠

🌟 Note, all works are x chubby!Reader 🌟

about me

Karasuno

characters written so far: > Sawamura Daichi > Sugawara Koushi > Hinata Shoyo > Kageyama Tobio > Tsukishima Kei > Ennoshita Chikara > Tsukishima Akiteru > Azumane Asahi > Nishinoya Yuu

Nekoma

characters written so far: > Kuroo Tetsuro > Kozume Kenma > Inuoka So

Fukurodani

characters written so far: > Bokuto Kotarou > Akaashi Keiji

Aoba Johsai

characters written so far: > Oikawa Tooru > Iwaizumi Hajime > Hanamaki Takahiro > Matsukawa Issei > Kyotani Kentaro

Inarizaki

characters written so far: > Kita Shinsuke > Miya Osamu > Miya Atsumu > Suna Rintaro > Oomimi Ren

Shiratorizawa

characters written so far: > Ushijima Wakatoshi > Tendou Satori > Semi Eita

Date Tech

characters written so far: > Futakuchi Kenji > Koganegawa Kanji > Aone Takanobu

Kamomedai

characters written so far: > Hirugami Sachiro > Hoshiumi Korai

Itachiyama

characters written so far: > Sakusa Kyoomi > Komori Motoya

Miscellaneous

🫧 Meian, a wife guy [drabble]

🫧 Meian - Being MSBY’s Single Dad word count: 1k, secret established relationship

Multi-Character Stories

🫧 When He Realizes You Are The One [drabble]

characters: Bokuto, Tendou, Kuroo, Atsumu, Oikawa, Noya, Sugawara, Makki, Daichi, your fave 🫧 IKEA Assembling Chaos [drabble]

characters: Kuroo, Bokuto, Atsumu, Futakuchi, Mattsun, Makki, Noya, Tendou, Oikawa, Ukai, Konoha, Suna, your fave

🍡 The Health Benefits Of Period Sex [drabble]

characters: Tendou, Kuroo, Makki, Mattsun, Futakuchi, Atsumu, Osamu, Suna, Konoha, Noya, Oikawa, your fave

🍡 Chub Rub [drabble]

characters: Tendou, Kuroo, Futakuchi, Konoha, Noya, Sugawara, Atsumu, Osamu, Mattsun, Iwaizumi, Hoshiumi, Suna, Yaku, your fave

🫧 Watching The Great British Bake Off [reaction]

characters: Sugawara, Bokuto, Hinata, Yamaguchi, Aone, Asahi, Tendou, Kita, Kuroo, Ennoshita, Akaashi, Koganegawa, Makki, Hirugami, Kageyama, Aran, Goshiki, Semi, Kenma, Futakuchi, Noya, Konoha, Iwaizumi, Tsukishima, Hoshiumi, Suna, Shirabu, Daichi, Ushijima, Mattsun, Osamu, Atsumu, Hoshiumi, Hinata, Bokuto, Oikawa, Yaku, Sakusa, Inuoka

🫧 Teaching You How To Ride A Bike [drabble]

characters: Daichi, Sugawara, Asahi, Noya, Hinata, Kageyama, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Ennoshita, Kita, Aran, Atsumu, Osamu, Suna, Oomimi, your fave

🍡 A Risky Game [drabble]

characters: Bokuto, Atsumu, Osamu, Noya, Kuroo, Futakuchi, Konoha, Sugawara, Mattsun, Makki, Tendou, Semi, Iwaizumi, Oikawa, Post-time skip Hinata, Ukai, Suna, Hoshiumi, Yaku, Hirugami, Daichi, your fave

🫧 Hand Warmers [drabble]

characters: Tendou, Atsumu, Osamu, Suga, Noya, Komori, lowkey Tsukki, Hinata, Ushijima, Kenma, Suna, Hoshiumi, Hirugami, Yaku, Oikawa, Iwaizumi, Futakuchi, Bokuto, Kuroo, Kageyama, Mattsun, Makki, Semi, Konoha, your fave

🌱 Never Too Much [drabble]

characters: Tendou, Yaku, Suna, Noya, Kuroo, Atsumu, Oikawa, Bokuto, Mattsun, Komori, your fave

🍡 One More Snooze [drabble]

characters: Osamu, Atsumu, Tendou, Komori, Kuroo, Bokuto, lowkey Kenma, Oikawa, Meian, Suna, Nishinoya, Konoha, Futakuchi, Hirugami, Sugawara, Yaku, Mattsun, Kita, your fave

🫧 fluff // 🌱 comfort // 🍡 suggestive // 🪭 spice // 🌧️ angst/hurt // 🍋|☕️|🍱|🎃 request

request events

01 [closed] 🍋 Lemonade Stand (100 followers)

02 [closed] 🍋 Lemonade Stand (spring)

03 [closed] ☕️ Cozy Café (300 followers)

04 [closed] 🍱 Lunch Break (400 followers)

05 [closed] 🍋 Lemonade Stand (summer)

06 [closed] 🎃 Trick or Treat Movie Night (fall/900 followers)

[infinitehench]

The Final Shape for Destiny 2 is the greatest expansion to expand anything that's ever been expandable and sure I will take questions I'm happy to help if I can

You ever expand one of those backpacks that has some buttons or a zipper on a hidden compartment to double its size or whatever? Final Shape is a better expansion

You ever go back to IKEA to buy an addition for your bookshelf to store more crap? Final Shape is a better expansion

Ever use an accordion? Sorry, Final Shape expanded better

Ever write a more thorough argument for your idea at work or school because an authority told you it needed to be expanded to make sense? I'm sure your did great, but... Final Shape better

Ok but seriously The Final Shape is absolutely spectacular. If you've ever been curious about Destiny or were waiting to come back, it's a perfect time to come be a magic-slinging space wizard. It's easy to catch up on the story with an in-game cinematic when you boot it up, and there's another one in the upper right of Destinations tab. YouTube is also a thing. Plus, all your gear got bumped to the current base level of 1900, and good-to-great weapons are easier than ever to get or craft. All the old sunset gear got un-sunset. You have no more excuses!

Seriously, favorite game of all time. Some of my best gaming memories with friends in raids and dungeons. I will personally tutor you through this game if that's what it takes. I'm not joking, I've guided dozens if not over a hundred raids and dungeons at this point and gotten tons of thumbs up. Besides, I'm unemployed right now, LOL.

The Final Shape for U.S. president 2024

Wait... maybe that doesn't come off right. WHATEVER COME PLAY DESTINY WITH US

[diorsluv]

casual , part 3

“ i’ve heard so many rumors ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by mackie.samo, jackhughes, and 259,226 others

yourusername post workout glow 🙈

view all comments

vivianliu mommy

→ yourusername whaaaaaat ⁉️⁉️⁉️

→ _quinnhughes …

→ rutgermcgroarty 📸📸

→ edwards.73 wtf

→ jackhughes no absolutely not

→ luca.fantilli HUH

→ dylanduke25 WHAT

→ vivianliu stop acting like i’ve never said ts before 🙄

edwards.73 you’re really fucking hot

liked by yourusername

→ lhughes_06 FUCK NO

→ jackhughes STEP THE FUCK BACK

→ _quinnhughes hey man what the FUCK

→ vivianliu GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY GIRL

username14 ETHANS COMMENT?????!?!?!?!?!?!

markestapa pretty girl 🫣

→ yourusername that’s so unnatural stop

→ markestapa just doing what the homies do

→ lhughes_06 did the lack of my presence fuck with your heads because i explicitly told everyone to NOT mess w my sister.

→ markestapa suck it up lil bro

mackie.samo GODDAMN

→ yourusername LMFAOOOO

→ jackhughes back the hell up dude

→ _quinnhughes this is a literal fever dream

username54 rumors aint rumors anymore

username38 ethan’s practically screaming their relationship status to the world rn

colecaufield i’m not a part of this in any way but you genuinely look really good rosie

→ yourusername awwww thank you ☺️

→ jackhughes if you ever fucked around with my sister i would punch you in the face

→ colecaufield I HAVENT AND I WONT I SWEAR

→ jackhughes YEAH U BETTER NOT CUZ IM READY 🤺

sidneycrosby_87_ looking great kiddo!

→ yourusername oh my god sidney crosby.

→ lhughes_06 OH MY GOD SIDNEY CROSBY???

→ jackhughes this isn’t fair

→ vivianliu HI SIDNEY

rutgermcgroarty 🥴

→ yourusername 🤭

→ lhughes_06 i can’t tell if you’re flirting because you’re best friends or if you’re flirting to fuck

→ rutgermcgroarty whaaaaa i would never do such a thing and you know that luke (my door is open yourusername)

→ yourusername we’re flirting AS A JOKE because you’re gone now and you can’t dictate shit anymore 🙄 lhughes_06

username45 LMFAO did ethan ask everyone to say shit to cover his comment

mackie.samo i see you’re working out without me now 🤨

→ yourusername YOU LEFT ME. what was i supposed to do 😔😔

→ mackie.samo YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON

→ yourusername IM HAPPIER NOW 🤬

→ markestapa what is this 😟

adamfantilli woha

→ adamfantilli owah

→ adamfantilli woah

→ yourusername are you malfunctioning

→ adamfantilli yes (i was told to)

jackhughes did you redecorate your room??

→ yourusername yes my man helped me redecorate 🥰

→ jackhughes YOUR MAN????

→ lhughes_06 WHO THE HELL

→ yourusername guys it was a joke..

→ lhughes_06 your life is a joke

→ yourusername ?!???!????!

_quinnhughes i know who it is.

→ yourusername no u dont

→ lhughes_06 TELL ME

→ jackhughes WHO IS IT

→ trevorzegras congrats to the only hughes brother with a brain 🥳

→ jackhughes HEY

→ lhughes_06 NOT COOL TREVOR

→ rutgermcgroarty the fact that it took you this long is concerning

→ markestapa okay she ACTUALLY told you rutgermcgroarty

→ dylanduke25 fr the rest of us had to find out DIFFERENTLY

→ edwards.73 you guys are kinda slow

username55 i know someones gonna come back for this post tn…

→ username97 LMFAOOO

→ username21 STOP DONT EXPOSE HIM LIKE THAT

username38 UR SO PRETTY

username30 GIRLLLL give us the workout routine please 😞🙏

username88 body goals hello????

trevorzegras ur bed was not in that corner last time i was there

→ yourusername i redecorated we already said so 🙄

→ jackhughes since when were you in my sister’s apartment??

→ trevorzegras i was in town for a game

→ jackhughes but detroit is 45 mins away????

→ trevorzegras WE WERE THERE FOR THREE DAYS

→ yourusername jack he was helping me set up my ikea dresser 😭😭

→ vivianliu i know someone’s absolutely LIVID

dylanduke25 WOW SO PRETTY

→ yourusername THANK U DUKER

→ dylanduke25 YOU’RE WELCOME

username96 help i audibly screamed when i saw this post

yourusername

liked by markestapa, _alexturcotte, and 153,256 others

yourusername some of the guys invaded girls night at 12 in the morning and then literally kicked us out of my own room ⁉️⁉️

tagged: vivianliu, markestapa, g.brindley4, rutgermcgroarty, dylanduke25, luca.fantilli

view all comments

edwards.73 why was i not invited

→ yourusername u didn’t come idk i thought u were busy like always

→ edwards.73 but you know i would never be too busy for you

→ yourusername lmao doesnt really seem like it tho

vivianliu and they burnt our fucking cookies

→ yourusername FR almost burnt the apartment down 🙄

→ dylanduke25 THAT WASN’T EVEN US

→ vivianliu U KNOW DAMN WELL THAT WAS U AND RUT

→ rutgermcgroarty WHY ARE U BLAMING ME???

g.brindley4 oh my god i’m on the main

→ yourusername YOU’RE ON THE MAIN ‼️

username38 mark wearing sunglasses in a dark ass room 😭

dylanduke25 rut’s ass was in my face and i swear he fucking ripped ass like three times

→ yourusername HELLO WHAT??? I DONT REMEMBER THIS

→ rutgermcgroarty I LITERALLY DIDNT THO??

→ luca.fantilli i could smell that shit from the other room

→ g.brindley4 the absolute STENCH

username32 luca could not have been comfortable sleeping in that position 😭

→ username80 men are weird

username67 AHHH PINK COOKIES

luca.fantilli cuddling with the homies 🥴🥴

→ yourusername oh my god

→ markestapa 😘

→ dylanduke25 im blushing ☺️☺️

→ g.brindley4 best couple!

→ rutgermcgroarty 😝

→ vivianliu you’re all so weird

trevorzegras marky lookin kinda cute tn 🫣

→ yourusername STOP

→ markestapa yes i’ll go out with you!

mackie.samo um. i facetimed him and hes kicking, screaming and crying?!?!?

→ yourusername oops

→ mackie.samo yeah what a big fucking oops 🙄

→ vivianliu HES THE TOXIC ONE

username77 getting kicked out of your own room is crazy

username48 ethan’s definitely punching the air rn

_alexturcotte what happened to the boyfriend

→ yourusername technically he’s not my boyfriend cuz he doesn’t like labels!

→ colecaufield 😭😭

→ yourusername HIS WORDS NOT MINE

→ trevorzegras imagine what’ll happen when your brothers find out 😂

→ yourusername 1. for the love of god stop using that emoji and 2. they wont find out!

→ _quinnhughes i found out

→ yourusername besides you 😒😒

username79 ethan’s definitely regretting not putting a label on them

username92 do luke and jack never check the comments 😭😭

→ vivianliu they did but rosie gaslighted them into believing it’s not ethan and they barely pay attention to what the others say anyways

→ username60 LMAOOO

lhughes_06 WE NEVER HAD SLEEPOVERS WHEN I WAS THERE WHAT??

→ yourusername i’m the better sibling

→ vivianliu correct

→ rutgermcgroarty correct

→ edwards.73 correct

→ colecaufield correct

→ adamfantilli correct

→ trevorzegras correct

→ _alexturcotte correct

→ markestapa correct

→ luca.fantilli correct

→ mackie.samo correct

→ dylanduke25 correct

→ _quinnhughes not correct????

→ jackhughes INCORRECT TF

edwards.73 I CAN’T GET OVER THE FACT THAT YOU DIDN’T INVITE ME

→ yourusername IM SORRY I GEN THOUGHT U WERE JUST BUSY AGAIN

→ markestapa there’s no way you’re still on this

→ edwards.73 inv me next time 😔

next chapter notes ) happy april fools dayyy!! hope yall got some good pranks in 😈😈 and guys HE DOESN’T DO LABELS 😓

tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust @alwaysclassyeagle @love4ldr @inhoodmood

[batsandbugs]

THE CONTINUATION OF THE IKEA VERSE

Okay, so this isn't quite an actual update yet, but I've been gone for a while and I wanted to let y'all know what's going on.

The last chapter of Classification System has been fighting me. Bruce and Damian's confrontation is important, but, up until now, I had no clue how it needed to go, or wanted it to end. After all, this story never had a planned plot, and was rather more a chaotic amalgamation of vibes that grew legs and dragged me along for the ride. While that worked well for the first story, the second wanted to veer into serious territory, which is maybe why it was fighting me so hard. I have serious stories, but IKEA Verse has never really been one of them.

So I started thinking of a third installment, hoping this inspiration would drive me to find the proper course for how Bruce and Damian's confrontation should unfold. So I put on my thinking cap, and thought, "hmmm... how am I going to bring back the fun and excitement and hilarity of the first installment, while still continuing Damian and Marinette's relationship?"

And my evil brain responded with...

"~Bigger is better, and better is bigger, a little bit is never enough, no, no, no!~"

So, ladies, gents, and others I now present to you the third installment of The IKEA VERSE:

THE GREAT GOTHAM SEWER RACE

CALLING ALL RACERS! Underneath Gotham lay miles of caverns, lava pools, zombie hordes, interdimensional racing tracks, funhouse hallways, a maze full of doors that do not open and lead into a never ending madness, a mysterious banked fog, submerged waterways, ancient temples, and more! Come try your hand at claiming the ultimate prize which lay hidden at the finish line.

If you survive...

Coming 2024!

So... yeah, IKEA Game Verse is getting a third installment. The last chapter of Classification System, should be out sometime within the next month or two, now that I have proper motivation to get it finished. And starting the new year I'll be posting the Great Gotham Sewer Race! Hope this makes up for the months of radio silence (although I have posted a few chapters of my Marvel fic, so I haven't been totally silent).

As always, all comments, suggestions, and ideas are welcome! The bigger and crazier the better and if it's good, there's a high likelihood it'll end up in the story (after all the knowledge of IKEA stores with ball pits was given via comment, and we all know how that panned out.) Think Hanabarbara Wacky Races! If anyone still remembers that show. Tell me who you want to see! ANYONE IN DC is open for consideration, other fandoms are also encouraged (the caverns beneath Gotham are interdimensional and inter-universal!) Tell me if there's any challenge, or obstacle, or event you want to see! I'm open anything and everything.

I hope this sparks excitement for y'all as it has done for me. See you soon!

[artemisiasthings]

I recently jumped into hand binding fanfic! After many bouts of trial and error while typesetting, and a month delay due to a busted printer, I’m finally getting started on my first project!

For my first bind, I’m doing The Great IKEA Game an amazing, unhinged Maribat fic by @batsandbugs.

I made this cover in Canva to set the vibes and made a typeset with some star details to mirror the twinkle lights that got Marinette into this mess! I’ll have to figure out how to print this and attach it to my case but that’s a future me problem.

I finally printed off the typeset today and can’t to wait to start folding and sewing it up!

More updates to come 💃🏽

Progress Posts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

[felixbit]

ikea "date"

── flufftober day six, masterlist tbd han jisung x gn!reader, w. 0.7k

A schedule had your boyfriend flying out to America for a performance, so you thought it would be a great idea to come along and take him to Ikea. You'd been talking about moving in together and all the furniture might give you some good ideas on decoration.

When you'd gotten out of the hotel and hopped in the car, you saw Jisung looking giddy. "You ready to go to one of the great marvels of America?"

"And get some stuffed animals? Yeah!"

The drive wasn't too far, although in Korean standards it took forever. But simply pulling into the parking lot had Jisung 'woah'-ing at the sheer size of the building. You couldn't help but laugh.

Walking inside, Jisung hastily grabbed your hand to hold it because everything in sight was new to him. Right in front of you was the entrance to the furniture tour but also a shop and a food court.

He led you towards the main attraction, walking side-by-side as your boyfriend acted shocked every time he saw a new tiny furnished room. This had you cracking up, since he would walk into most of them and look at everything.

You'd hoped this trend would stop, but almost thirty minutes had gone by and you knew you'd hardly explored a quarter of the store. When he was standing and looking at the fake gaming computer setup, you came up next to him and put a hand on his lower back.

"Jisungie, if you do this we'll be here for like, three hours," You said softly.

"Really?!" Jisung exclaimed before giving an apologetic look for his volume, dropping his voice, "How big is this store?"

"Huge."

After that, you sped up the pace, only really giving each room a passing few-second glance. Although, there were a few he 'had to go into' and inspected the furniture like before. The pace was faster now and you were quickly getting close to the best part.

As you finished looking at all the rooms and arrived at the section where furniture pieces were on display by type, Jisung seemed antsy to move on. You never let go of his hand while you pulled him towards a room he'd love.

Walking inside, you were met with piles of stuffed animals. There were hundreds, thousands even. Big stacks of each type, some with multiple sizes. Jisung looked floored as he approached the basket of pandas.

He glanced at you before turning back and letting himself fall into the pile, cushioned by all the little fluffy creatures. You let out a loud laugh, walking over and sighing.

"Get out of there, Jisungie."

"This is my home forever now," Jisung explained dramatically, "I'm not going back to Korea."

"If you get up I'll let you get as many stuffed animals as you can hold."

That did the trick. He was up and ready to go, pulling a panda in his arms as he looked around for more. He handed you a panda as well, clearly intending to use your arm space as well.

Walking out of the stuffed animal room, you both had your arms full. He had a shark, a bear, an orca, two pandas, and a tiny rat. You had a pretty similar haul, just different sizes of his original picks (since he couldn't decide which one he wanted more).

You had to awkwardly carry the stuffed creatures through the rest of the store, although it wasn't a long walk. By the time you were checking out, you felt the glances from everyone around you.

After all the plush animals were bought, Jisung walked out of the store with his arms full, looking at you proudly. As he was loading his haul into the back of the car, he grinned at you.

"That was awesome. Thank you for taking me!" He smiled as he helped you get the last of the stuffed animals into the car, pulling you into a tight hug.

"I love you, Han Jisung," You wrapped your arms around him and squeezed, "Now, let's get these back to the hotel and figure out how we're getting these back in our luggage."

"I love you too- oh, wait. How are we going to get these home?"

"You tell me."

[crazylittlejester]

LU Links as things I did in the month of September (except two weeks late because i forgot to post it and it’s been rotting in my drafts-)

Time: Sat in the gamestop parking lot for TWO full hours waiting for the store to open so he could get the game he preordered because he thought the line would be super fucking long and he made a friend come with him and wait because he NEEDED his game, but he didn’t wanna get lonely. No one showed up till like 10 minutes too and at that point he’d gotten so distracted he ended up last in a line of 5 people and he was really upset about it

Warriors: Got bit by a mosquito and had a severe reaction to it but because he whines and complains about everything all the time people were just kinda like “yeah I’m sure it DOES bother you dude” but it was genuinely so bad he was on 3 meds for a week, had an allergic reaction, and had to go to urgent care. And on his way to said urgent care a lady told him he looked sad and handed him a 10$ IKEA coupon. When people in his life actually saw the size of the bite they were horrified

Twilight: Looked at his dog and cried because he didn’t understand why such a little creature would love him enough to fall asleep outside his room waiting for him to wake up in the morning

Sky: Stood outside in a rainstorm with his head down staring at his bare ass feet in his sandals that were getting absolutely soaked and decided he maybe DIDNT need to get the mail just then, but then slipped and ate shit in the garage because his shoes were wet

Hyrule: Drove 40 minutes for a can of pringles and three 3 musketeers bars. Intended to ration them out over the course of three days, but ate them all in one sitting and then got sad about it

Legend: Realized he can’t be sad if he’s screaming to FNAF songs in the car, and then realized yes he CAN be sad because FNAF songs remind him of his best friend who he really fucking misses. Now he listens to podcasts in the car because he will start tearing up if he listens to music in general while he drives

Wild: Spontaneously drove to a different state on a Thursday afternoon and the fact that it was a Thursday fucked with his internal calendar and for the rest of the weekend he was mentally one day off. But it ended up being great for him because he woke up and cried Monday morning but then realized it was actually Sunday and no he DIDNT have to go to school

Four: Ate so much chocolate he made himself sick and unfortunately this happened while all his housemates were out so he just had to lay there pathetically wishing he at least wasn’t lonely while suffering

Wind: Wakes up every god damn day and choses NOT to eat his dnd dice. It is a STRUGGLE. They look so fucking edible…

[witchofthesouls]

Guys, what if the TFP verse didn't have grocery stores and supermarkets?!

If the Cybertronian diet is limited to liquid from crystal Energon, then they would be completely used to a great beast of a combination between Home Depot, IKEA, and Kay Jewelers. Like a build your own customizable personal fuel station or for the department. Maybe there's minor cultivation of different kinds of crystals that act as herbs and spices equivalent. Look at the displays of crystal decor. While it's Energon, the structures are too unstable or deemed unusable for consumption to be sold (different story for the lowest castes trapped in poverty though)

The 'bots are familiar with a job site providing room and board as well as picking up prepared food from restaurants at different price points. But if Team Prime actually looked into the history of agriculture on Earth, the immense scale and absolute variety would shock them speechless. Optimus would fall into a deep tunnel of botanical science versus the culinary arts and how a lot of veggies are basically the same plant that's been curated to enhance very specific features.

There's a new game at the base and road, it's called "Can you eat this?"

(This actually starts a lot of "lively discussions" between the kids because of cultural differences, family histories, and geographic/regional dishes and traditons.)

And if the kids ever needed to do a report on animals or plants or food, then they would receive full marks.

If the 'bots ever get enough fuel to use a holomatter, then the kids would get the delight of seeing:

Teaching Optimus how to select a good watermelon. The man is in deep concentration as he eyes for a "sun spot, a creamy other side, and a good-sounding thump."

June and Ratchet having a hissy and very heated argument over what's inside the shopping cart. The cart fills and empties between them.

Arcee staring down the produce that is and isn't organic, and then trying to figure out the difference between oranges and grapefruits without breaking them open

Bumblebee buzzing around the honey products and sweets to make puns and jokes. He's having a blast in the personal care aisles, especially with the masks and Burt's Bees.

Bulkhead is entranced by the inside Starbucks and the meat department. He's watching the baristas and counter workers deftly move to produce a new thing. He wants to learn to make a sandwich and a Frappuccino for Miko.