#the golf swing to avoid flipping

[rotaryswinggolf]

How To Shift Your Weight In The Golf Swing To Avoid Flipping 🏌️‍♂️

In this golf lesson, we will be diving into the essential technique of how to shift your weight in the golf swing to avoid flipping. We'll discuss simple setup changes and how to get deep into the right side to improve your swing. Many amateur golfers struggle with this, so we'll show you the common tendencies and how to correct them. We will also cover the importance of maintaining a full shoulder turn and how it affects your downswing sequence. You'll be amazed at how small adjustments can make a big impact on your swing and overall game.

[itneverendshere]

gimme a blonde that's six feet two - r.c

pairing: kelce's sister x hockey!rafe warnings: none.

There’s a knock at your door at exactly 9:47 p.m.

You weren’t expecting anyone, but you’re not surprised to find Rafe standing there when you open it. He's wearing sweats, his usual oversized hoodie, and—oddly—a black beanie pulled low over his ears.

In a blink, he’s got his arm around your waist. One hand cups your jaw, and he pulls you into a kiss before you have time to ask what’s happening. You melt into him instantly, heart pliant as he leans in closer. His mouth moves against yours, greedy as usual. Rafe smells like your favorite hoodie and peppermint gum, and goddammit, it’s so maddening how he always tastes good. 

When he pulls back, his lips are pink, and your breath is gone. 

“I missed you,” he murmurs.

You look at him, “You saw me two days ago.”

He shrugs. “Too long.”

You grin—until you realize he still hasn’t taken off the beanie.

You’ve seen Rafe wear hats before—backwards snapbacks on hot days, visors when he's being an asshole about his golf swing, even the occasional hoodie pulled low when he’s avoiding attention. But a full-on black beanie indoors, pulled so low it’s strangling his eyebrows? Suspicion doesn’t even begin to cover it.

You raise an eyebrow. “Since when do you wear beanies?”

He grins. “Since now.”

Suspicious.

You step aside to let him in, already scrutinizing as he kicks off his sneakers and drops onto your bed with practiced ease. He’s doing that thing where he’s trying to act normal, except he’s not. Something’s up.

“Okay. What happened?”

“Nothing.”

“What did you do?”

He nonchalantly raised his shoulders. “Nothing.”

You narrow your eyes and take a step closer to the bed. He’s sprawled out, the beanie still hasn’t moved, and that alone is setting off all kinds of internal alarms.

You nod slowly, “Right.”

Rafe presses his lips together, fighting a smirk. 

You gesture toward his head with an accusing squint. “What’s going on under there?”

He stretches his arms above his head and lets out a dramatic yawn. “Nothing. Can’t a man wear a beanie in peace?”

You point again, firm this time. “Take it off.”

He sits up straighter. “What, the hoodie? Damn, princess. At least buy me dinner first.”

You make a really loud eye roll. 

“The beanie, jackass.”

Rafe clutches a pillow to his chest protectively. “No.”

“No?”

He shook his head. "Nope. This is me now. Beanie guy. Very brooding, misunderstood.”

“You’re about five seconds from being very fucking single.”

He gasps, “Baby.”

“Rafe.”

“...I’m trying something new?”

“Rafe.”

He groans, flopping onto his back and muttering toward the ceiling, “Okay, don’t freak out.”

That has never meant anything good.

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m serious. No freaking out.”

Your stomach flips, not in a good way.

“Don’t say that.” You smack his arm, hard. “That’s what people say before they tell you they crashed your car or adopted a dog without asking.”

Rafe sits on the edge of your bed, hands braced on his knees.

“Okay.”

“You sound like you ran over a cat.”

“I didn’t run over a cat.”

“Then why are you being so weird?”

He sighs deeply, then sits back up and looks at you with dead seriousness. 

“Promise you won’t break up with me.”

“What the fuck did you do?”

Finally, he reaches up, peels off the beanie, and reveals the mess underneath.

His hair is short. Significantly shorter. The hair through which you used to run your fingers? Replaced by a choppy, uneven cut that still looks good on him. However, that’s not the worst part.

It’s blonde, platinum. 

“Should be fronting a boy band” blonde. Bright under your dorm lights, almost glowing. The Rafe you know—the one with the sun-streaked strands you adored running your fingers through, the effortlessly hot, hockey-golden-boy Rafe—has vanished.

Your jaw drops.

He scratched the back of his neck innocently, "Sooooo..."

You keep staring. “You—what—why?”

He winces. “Okay, to be fair—”

“What.”

“I lost a bet.”

“You what?”

“It was a puck drop challenge,” he says quickly, like that’ll make it make more sense. “Topper said if I lost, I had to let him choose the forfeit, and I didn’t think I’d actually—”

Bets have always been a common thing in your brother's hockey career. Whether it’s who can chug a protein shake the fastest, who can do the most burpees in full gear, or who’ll score first in a scrimmage—it’s always something. You grew up around the chaos; having Kelce as a brother means you’ve had front-row seats to years of testosterone-fueled stupidity that somehow always ends with someone humiliated or half-naked.

Still, you're gawking, speechless.

“Say something,” he pleads, a little desperate now.

He shouldn’t be able to pull this off. By all logic, he should look ridiculous, but somehow the choppy haircut, the bleach—it works. You find yourself resisting the unwelcome urge to climb into his lap and tug on that stupid hair.

“You dyed your hair for Topper.”

He groans, hands flopping to his sides. “I didn’t think I’d lose!”

You step closer, reaching up. “Can I...?”

He nods. With his permission, you run your fingers through the short strands; it’s still, strangely, soft, albeit unfairly so. 

"You hate it," he laughs it off, trying to be cool.

You want to. But your traitor brain is admiring how sharp his jawline seems now and how the lighter hair makes his eyes stand out. This man could look good while wearing a trash bag. It pisses you off. 

How is it fair that he can bleach his hair and still entice you to climb him like a jungle gym?

You sway your head in disbelief.

“You shouldn’t be able to pull this off.”

His brows lift. “So you like it?”

You pinch your nose bridge. “Unfortunately.”

He gets up, closing the space between you, smirking like the smug little shit he is. 

“So... you're saying I look hot?”

“You look fine.” You suck your teeth, “I guess.”

His hands find your waist. “That sounds like a yes.”

You mean to shove him, honestly—you do. But his fingers settle in, fitting around you with muscle memory. Your body recognizes him right away. The same way you recognize your favorite dress in a pile of clean laundry—by instinct.

You glance up, scowl half-loaded, and say, “No.”

He grins, golden under the light. “You are into it. I knew it.”

“You’re my boyfriend. I’m allowed to think you’re hot.”

You pinch his arm, and he laughs because he knows he’s right.

Rafe’s so annoying when he wants to. He’s the type of hot that makes people do stupid things, and not even that bad bleach job could stop him.

He steps closer, head tilted, trying to read your mind, blue eyes stuck on your mouth. “That so?”

“Yeah.” 

That’s all you manage to rasp out, your lips so close they’d already be engulfing each other in some other version of this moment.

You fist his hoodie in both hands, and Rafe comes like gravity's got nothing on you.

His mouth finds yours without ever fumbling; it opens under yours, intent, while one of his pulls you in with a roughness that has your insides melting in the most exquisite, involuntary way.

A breathy whimper escapes you, and it splits him open inside, in places he didn’t know he wanted to break. Your back hits the door; he’s crowding you there, heat and muscle. His thumb bashes in the lower torso between your sleep shirt and shorts; you flinch at how stupidly good it feels.

Rafe chuckles, "You were gonna make me beg, weren’t you?”

Oh, you will. But you’re too busy kissing him again to answer, dragging your nails over his neck. His hoodie rides up slightly when you press your hips into him, and he hisses through his teeth, mouthing down your jawline. You can feel him smile when you suck in a breath. You tilt your head, giving him more room, and he takes full advantage.

“You’re not gonna apologize for the hair?”

“Gonna do it with my mouth.”

Cocky bastard.

You’re tempted to push him off, make him sweat for it. 

“You’re lucky I’m into real blondes now.”

Rafe stifles a laugh—disbelieving, entirely at your mercy. “Yeah?”

“Mm-hm,” you purr, manicured hands dragging up his chest maddeningly slow, grazing fabric purposefully to mess with him. “Lucky I have a thing for bleach-blonde, hockey boys with dumb ideas and dumber friends.”

He doesn’t bother processing the insults, lips parting ready to kiss you stupid again, and you duck him. Slide out from under those arms, giggling as you strut toward your bed.

You toss a glance over your shoulder. “Goodnight, platinum.”

He blinks, dazed. “Wait—what?!”

You pull your sleep shirt up over your shoulders, leaving yourself in nothing but the tiniest pair of black cotton shorts.

“Next time, maybe you win the bet.”

He stares, thunderstruck. “You’re joking.”

His drooling, jaw slack, eyes glued to your chest like he’s never seen you topless in his life. Mind you, that man has his face buried there for many hours of the day.

You blow him a kiss. “And you’re hard.”

Rafe doesn’t move or blink. Doesn’t think. He stares at you—at the sway in your hips, how your curls catch the lamp light, the final boss of a fever dream.

You glance down at yourself, feigning innocence.

“What?” You stretch your arms over your head, spine arching deliciously. 

The sound that leaves his throat is not human.

“Thought you were gonna apologize,” you taunt with a smirk, crawling into bed, “With your mouth.”

That’s the final straw.

He lunges.

You barely get your giggle out before you hear the dangerous growl of your name—“Oh, nah”—and then Rafe Cameron is full-on airborne, like a fucking jungle cat with a vendetta. You shriek-laugh as he tackles you onto the mattress, body slamming like you’re on the ice rink, landing on your legs, half on your pride.

Suddenly, you’ve got a 6'2 hockey boyfriend gnawing at your tits like a god-given mission.

“RAFE CAMERON!”

He’s puffing and blowing with laughter, nose in your neck, body wrapped around you trying to wrestle the last word and the oxygen out of your lungs.

“You gotta show me love,” he huffs into your skin.

“Get off—” You squirm, but it’s futile. He’s too heavy and insufferably fine with that stupid peroxide hair and those stupid rough hands and that stupid knee between your thighs.

“You said I’m lucky you’re into blondes now?” He kisses a hot trail up your chest, “Lemme make sure you mean it.”

You flail, no real bite into it. “No. Apologize.”

“I’m apologizing!” He defends, already halfway to sin, voice muffled as he mouths at your sternum. “You said to use my mouth.”

“You’re not sorry at all!”

“I will be if you keep talking—”

“Rafe!”

"Say it again," He pins your wrist above your head with one of his hands, the other already halfway under your shorts, nipping at your chest while still laughing like na asshole.

“No.”

You will. Maybe...eventually.

After he earns it.

[houstongolflesson1]

How to Build Confidence with Beginner Golf Lessons in Houston

Golf is often considered a sport of precision, patience, and skill. Whether you’re playing for fun, exercise, or competition, feeling confident on the course is essential to improving your performance and enjoying the game. For beginners, golf can seem daunting with its numerous rules, techniques, and intricate nuances. Fortunately, beginner golf lessons in Houston offer a structured way to build your skills and, more importantly, your confidence.

In this article, we’ll explore how beginner golf lessons in Houston can help you build confidence, overcome obstacles, and create a solid foundation for long-term growth in the sport. We’ll also discuss the key factors that contribute to a positive learning experience and how they can lead to a more confident, enjoyable golfing journey.

The Importance of Confidence in Golf

Confidence is the cornerstone of a successful golf game. Without it, even the most skilled players can struggle to perform at their best. For beginners, confidence is crucial, as it can help overcome the initial anxiety and frustration that often accompany starting a new sport. Building confidence in golf isn’t just about improving your skills—it's about learning to trust your abilities and staying positive, even when things don’t go as planned.

In golf, the mental aspect of the game is just as important as the physical. A confident golfer is more likely to stay calm under pressure, make decisions quickly, and stay focused throughout the round. On the flip side, a lack of confidence can lead to overthinking, frustration, and poor performance, even if you’ve mastered the techniques.

How Beginner Golf Lessons in Houston Can Help Build Confidence

Houston is home to a wide variety of golf courses and lessons for players of all levels, but beginner golf lessons Houston, in particular, are designed to give you the foundation you need to gain confidence. Here’s how:

1. Personalized Instruction and Feedback

One of the greatest benefits of beginner golf lessons in Houston is the opportunity for personalized instruction. Whether you’re taking group lessons or one-on-one coaching, a qualified instructor will observe your swing, stance, grip, and technique. They’ll provide feedback specific to your needs, helping you understand what you're doing right and where you need to improve.

Instructors also break down each aspect of the game into manageable steps, ensuring that beginners don’t feel overwhelmed. As you progress and see small improvements over time, your confidence will naturally increase. Personalized feedback allows you to correct mistakes early, making it easier to avoid developing bad habits that could hinder your growth.

2. Creating a Solid Foundation

Confidence grows when you feel knowledgeable and skilled in what you're doing. Beginner golf lessons in Houston teach the fundamentals of the game, from understanding the different clubs and their uses to mastering proper swing techniques and stance. A solid foundation is essential for building both skill and confidence in golf.

When you begin lessons, you won’t be expected to master advanced techniques right away. Instead, your lessons will focus on the basics: how to properly grip a club, the importance of posture and alignment, and how to approach a golf ball. Once you have these basics down, you'll feel more comfortable on the course and more confident in your abilities.

3. Progress at Your Own Pace

Confidence is built over time, and beginner golf lessons Houston are designed to accommodate players of all abilities. This means you can progress at your own pace, moving from simple techniques to more advanced skills as you become ready. The ability to take things one step at a time without pressure allows you to master the fundamentals before tackling more complex challenges.

For example, in your first lessons, you might focus on short-range shots, gradually moving to longer drives and more difficult courses. This gradual progression builds confidence because you’re never pushed beyond your current abilities. As you succeed with each skill you master, you’ll feel more capable and more confident in your game.

4. Developing a Positive Mindset

In any sport, the right mindset is key to success. Golf can be frustrating, especially when you’re just starting out. However, beginner golf lessons in Houston teach not only physical skills but also the mental aspect of the game. Instructors often emphasize the importance of staying positive, managing frustration, and focusing on the process rather than the outcome.

A positive mindset is essential for building confidence. It’s easy to get discouraged when things don’t go as planned, but golf is a sport that rewards patience and perseverance. Beginner lessons will often include mental coaching, such as how to stay calm after a bad shot or how to refocus between holes. Developing a confident mindset early on in your lessons will help you stay motivated and continue improving.

5. On-Course Experience

While practicing at a driving range or putting green is important, actually playing on the course is where confidence is truly tested. Many beginner golf lessons in Houston offer on-course training, where you can apply what you've learned in a real-world setting. This hands-on experience helps you understand how to make decisions under pressure, how to approach different holes, and how to navigate various course conditions.

In addition to building your skill set, playing on a course allows you to experience the game in a controlled yet real environment. Having an instructor by your side while you’re on the course can reduce anxiety and build confidence as you start to feel more comfortable in game situations.

6. Meeting Other Beginners

Golf is often seen as an individual sport, but when you take beginner golf lessons in Houston, you'll meet other new players who are in the same boat as you. This shared experience can be incredibly helpful for boosting your confidence. Many beginners feel intimidated by more experienced players, but when you’re learning alongside others, you realize that everyone is at a similar starting point.

Being part of a group lesson can foster camaraderie and reduce the pressure of trying to be perfect. It’s encouraging to see others struggle with similar challenges and grow together. The support of others in your beginner lessons can make you feel more confident in your own abilities, knowing you’re not alone on your journey.

7. Building Consistency Through Repetition

Confidence comes with practice, and the more consistent you are in your training, the more confident you’ll become. Beginner golf lessons provide structure and regularity, ensuring that you’re getting the repetition necessary to build muscle memory and refine your techniques.

Whether you’re practicing your swing or putting skills, consistency is key to improvement. The more familiar you become with the different aspects of golf, the more natural it will feel, which directly translates into greater confidence. As you hit more successful shots and see your progress, your belief in your ability to perform will grow.

Additional Tips to Boost Your Confidence on the Course

While beginner golf lessons Houston provide the foundation, there are several additional tips you can use to further enhance your confidence:

Set Realistic Goals: Don’t expect perfection right away. Set small, achievable goals that you can gradually build upon as you improve.

Focus on Enjoyment: Golf should be fun. Don’t let mistakes derail your enjoyment. The more you have fun with the game, the more confident you’ll feel.

Track Your Progress: Keep track of your scores, skills, and improvements. This helps you see how far you’ve come, which can be a big confidence booster.

Visualize Success: Before taking a shot, visualize yourself making a successful hit. This mental technique can help calm your nerves and boost your confidence.

Conclusion

Building confidence in golf doesn’t happen overnight, but beginner golf lessons in Houston provide the ideal environment to foster growth, skill development, and positive thinking. From personalized instruction to on-course experience, these lessons offer everything you need to build confidence on and off the course. By mastering the basics, developing a positive mindset, and practicing consistently, you’ll gradually gain the confidence you need to take on new challenges and enjoy golf to the fullest.

If you’re ready to start your journey and boost your confidence in golf, consider signing up for beginner golf lessons in Houston today. With the right guidance, the right mindset, and the right support, you’ll be hitting your golf goals with confidence in no time.

Reference: Beginner golf lessons Houston

Reference: Top Golf Lessons Houston

[rotary-swing]

How To Shift Your Weight In The Golf Swing – Avoiding A Flip

A big problem, especially with amateur golfers is knowing exactly how to shift your weight in the golf swing. In the image below, you can see a current student who spent some time studying Stack and Tilt. Now, he’s not set up exactly how they would advocate, but you can see the tendency of being more on the left side at address. You can clearly see that at address, he’s definitely set up more into his left side.

[twinkleimagines]

✨ Decisions, decisions✨

Summary: Toms best friend Harrison is not very fond of you, like at all. You are a bit on the hood/ side and not as proper as they were raised up around and he doesn’t see you fit to be with Tom. It causes a lot of problems between the 3 of you in the long run. Does Tom listen to his best friend or does he listen to his own heart and stay with you?

“ Y/n c’mon love, we can’t keep him waiting” Tom yelled down the hall towards the guest bathroom. You were getting dressed to go meet Toms best friend Harrison for the first time while they played golf and you were honestly comepletely panicking. You had met his family and they all seemed to love you, but a mans best friend will be the first to convince him whether who he’s picked as a partner is right or not. You had heard nothing but good of Harrison so you assumed he would like you, but it was still scary to think about.

“ I know I know I’m coming babe” you responded back . You looked over your outfit again, making sure you looked good . You had on high wasted blue leggings, laces down the sides of your legs, and a white crop top that was only wide enough to cover your breasts. Your hair was in a partial ponytail on the top, the rest flowing down your back. You had light make up on as well as some jewelry, and peach Nike Air Force 1s to finish the look. ( All thanks to Fashion Nova) .

“ who told you you could look this good? ” Tom asked jokeingly standing at the entrance of the bathroom door. You giggled shaking your bottom at him some before looking back in the mirror, fixing your hair.

“ you don’t look so bad yourself handsome” you replied. He was dressed in a tight fitted purple shirt, a black hat on and black pants that just all fit him so perfectly. He grinned widely before looking down at his feet bashfully.

“ love, you look amazing c’mon we’re suppose to meet him there in 30 minutes”.

“ okay okay I’m done” you said grabbing your purse and your phone, walking up to him. You quickly gave him a peck on his lips before squeezing past him , heading for thefront door.

***

“ Tom I don’t even know how to Golf I’m just going to look like and idiot standing there” you stated as you pulled up at the golf course .

“ it’s okay” he laughed turning the car off. “ you’re just coming with to have a good time darling not a golf lesson”. You nodded in agreement before getting out of the car yourself . You rode in the Golf cart in silence, your heart nearly beating out of your chest.

“ calm down love” Tom said placing his hand on your rapidly shaking thigh. You hadn’t even noticed how fast you were bouncing your leg, sort of a habit when you were nervous. You literally didn’t know a thing about Golf at all and here you are having to impress someone while playing.

Sure enough when Tom pulled the golf cart up to the field they would be playing on, Harrison was already there . The field was huge and fortunately you guys had it to yourself .

“Ello mate!” Tom yelled out to Harrison, grabbing his attention. Harrison looked up with a big smile, happy to see the both of you but his eyes instantly adverted to your choice of clothing. You instantly felt like you had made the wrong decision, your heart beating even faster.

“ I’m y/n is good to finally meet you!” You moaned, reaching out to shake Harrison’s hand.

“ likewise” was all he could say, shaking your hand with his. You stood awkwardly had Tom and Harrison talked over their plans on Golfing. They had chatted up while playing, mainly Tom telling Harrison what all the both of you had been up to. They had seen each other only twice in the past two months since you and Tom started your relationship. It wasn’t because of the relationship obviously but because of Toms hectic schedule. You were just more available to travel with him than Harrison ever has been .

Unfortunately though Harrison put the blame on you. He felt that Toms fairly new relationship made him forget about Harrison. His pride and ego wouldn’t dare allow him to actually tell anyone that though so no one was able to tell him otherwise.

“ darling come give it a try” Tom suggested, stepping back away from the golf ball on the ground. You smiled uncomfortably.

“ I don’t know what to do “ you said while walking towards the both of them.

“ it’s easy, right Harrison?” Tom said looking at Harrison. Harrison just shrugged as if he wasn’t too interested in anything that involved you. “ okay so you’re going to stand right here, feet spread apart” Tom said grabbing ahold of your hips. “ arch your back just a little “ he stated pushing on your lower back a little . You arched your back some , pushing your bottom out . You could feel Toms crotch pressed up against your bottom now causing you to smirk.

“ I like this, I just might have to come out here more often “ you grinned looking back behind you. Tom chuckled loudly shaking his head at you.

“ behave” he stated before reaching down grabbing a hold of your hands against the club. “ so you’ll just want to line the end of your club with the ball, and focus on the distance from the ball to your hole” . You giggled thinking inappropriate thoughts from his comment of ‘ balls to your hole’ .

“Y/n stop” he said laughing along with you.

“ okay okay” you said straightening yourself back out before taking your swing at he ball. To everyone’s surprise you had made it into the hole on your first try.

“Ha!” You laughed, turning towards Tom and Harrison. “ what u know bout them boys” you said flipping your hair over your shoulder.

“ holy shit” Tom said standing in shock. Harrison on the other hand didn’t seem in the most appealed at all. The rest of the afternoon went about the same , yoh and Tom joking with each other and Harrison doing his best to avoid any conversation with you.

“ I’m beat man” Tom said standing next to Harrison. You 3 had been out there for a while and the sun was causing you to sweat in places you wish you hadn’t . “ are we all still going back to my place for dinner and movies?” He asked looking back between the both of you Harrison.

“ beeett I’m down” you beamed excitedly. Harrison on the other hand didn’t look excited in the list.

“ I probably shouldn’t I got some things goin on” he stated looking over at Tom.

“ c’mon mate we haven’t seen each other in ages “ Tom said popping his hand against Harrison’s bicep.

“ yeah I noticed” Harrison scoffed out, looking at you. Tom didn’t realize what Harrison was implying but you did without a doubt .

*

Tom managed to convince Harrison in tagging along surprisingly . You had given up trying to impress him, realizing that he was putting you to blame for Toms absences in his life which wasn’t at all the case.

“ thank you!” Tom said grabbing the to go food from the cashier before wrapping his free arm around your waist.

“ babe you don’t have to force Harrison to spend time with me anymore, I can go chill somewhere else” you stated, pushing some of your hair behind your ear nervously.

“ what? What do you mean ‘force’?” He questioned as you walked back to the car. You sighed heavily. Would Harrison not being fond of you jeopardize your relationship or would it just be a set back for Tom?

“ he doesn’t like me Tom” you stated lowering your head. You really hated it . You wanted Harrison’s approval the most and you had absolutely no idea how to get it.

“ what? Of course he does Darling” Tom reassured. “ you’re just over thinking it to much love stop stressing” he said George kissing your temple. You sighed before nodding. You knew Tom was wrong but you didn’t want to press on it any longer than needed. The ride back to Toms place was peacefully quiet, the wind blowing in the both of your hair in his convertible, the sun glistening against Toms soft skin. You never felt so lucky to have such a perfect boyfriend and the fear of losing him was really starting to sink in .

“ he’s already here?” You questioned as you noticed Harrison’s car in driveway.

“ yeah he’s got a key” Tom said getting out of the car. You got even more anxious realizing you didn’t even have time to prepare yourself once again to try to impress Harrison. When you walked in Harrison was sitting on the couch on his phone, next to your pile of laundry that you had forgotten to put up this morning.

“ oh my gosh I’m so sorry” you pleaded with a little bit of laughter, grabbing up the pile of clothes. “ I totally forgot them this morning” you said looking at Harrison. He didn’t even bother to look up from his phone to acknowledge you.

“ it’s fine” he mumbled under his breath. You wouldn’t have even heard his response if you weren’t actually looking for it.

“ okay” you said awkwardly before walking to the bedroom , tossing the clothes down on the bed. You quickly grabbed out a gray strapless romper pajama outfit of yours and a pair of slippers for the movie, needing something more comfortableto wear.

Tom had gotten you this romper specifically because it showed every curve on your body and he loved looking at your body. You made your way back into the built in theater where Tom was already at setting up the food .

“ what movie are you picking out?” He said walking up behind you, his hands rubbing against your bottom.

“ a scary one “ you said with excitement. Horror was your ultimate favorite genre, especially now because it gave you an excuse to sit super close to Tom.

“ oh , now why did you pick this outfit? “ Tom asked, pulling your hips back until your bottom was against his crotch. His bulge was very prominent.

“ oohh “ you said , moving your hips in a slow swaying motion against him. He moaned softly in your ear, as you continued pressing up against him.

“ stop” he groaned out. “ before we end up pulling a wuicky in the bathroom” he stated stepping back from you.

“ who said that would be a bad id-“

“ did you guys forget about me?” Harrison said standing in the doorway.

“ of course not lad c’mon then” Tom said looking over his shoulder. You grinned while you watched Tom trying to hide his very noticeable boner while walking out of the theater. “ get settled I’ll go grab some drinks” he said excusing himself. You and Harrison stood in silence across from each other in silence before you sighed heavily turning around to face the big screen.

“ have you seen ‘It’ the second one?” You asked scrolling through the horror movie section.

“ no, and I don’t particularly care for it neither” he stated hatefully , plopping himself down on one of the recliners. You stood still for a second before turning and looking at him.

“ what did I do?” You said throwing your hands up. Harrison looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. You scoffed. “ it’s clear you don’t like me, so I’m asking what the hell did I do to you?” At that moment Tom had walked in, stopping behind Harrison. You didn’t know if Harrison had noticed Tom or not when he stood up, back still facing Tom.

“ I’m sorry but I just don’t think you’re best for my friend” he stated crossing his arms. “ he’s so Involved In you that he can’t even spend time with anyone else .” You tossed your head back with a sarcastic laugh. “ and then this” he said pointing down to your attire. “ you’re meeting his best friend and dressing like that . You say highly in appropriate things, and I just don’t see what he sees in you�� . You could feel a lump in the back of your throat forming, tears seconds away from falling.

“ I see a beautiful, talented, confident, hilarious, intelligent, supportive woman who shouldn’t listen to a word you just said” Tom piped up , startling Harrison. ” look mate you’re my best bud but I am in love with that woman and everything about her . Since we’ve been together I’ve been working a lot and she just so happen to have an available schedule so she was able to come with me” he stated walking back over towards you. “ you just didn’t bother to realize that’s why we haven’t gotten together because you just assumed it was her fault instead of asking me” . At this point Harrison had his head down shamefully .

“ Harrison I’m sorry you don’t like me” you stated . “ but I really really love Tom , and I am so happy with him.” Harrison sighed before nodding .

“ look I’m sorry okay” he stated running his hand through his hair. “ it was wrong of me to judge you right off the bat, I just want what’s best for him, and if he’s happy then I’m happy for him.” Tom walked up to Harrison hugging him.

“ I’m beyond happy man” Tom said looking back towards you. You grinned before grabbing the remote.

“ well now that that’s over can we get back to the movie?” You asked turning towards the screen. 

You all had spent the rest of the night full of laughter, Harrison actually enjoying your presence this time.

🤍🤍🤍 credit to ig model and artist- Malutrevejo for the first photo❤️

[dalnim96]

mood swing

➡ summary: bla bla you are happily married to jungkook and he’s perfect, you are perfect until he starts to behave strangely.

➡ pairing: jungkook | female reader

➡ words: 5k

➡ genre: fluff | expecting parent!au

➡ note: sorry for the summary. i don’t know how to put it in short. and this story is originally written with kim jongdae as the main character in my asianfanfics account but since he is off limits now, i decided to change it into jungkook and repost it here. unedited. pardon my vocab and grammar.

Waking up in the morning was never something that you can do with such ease but today it feels different, a good different you might say. There are no words to express it – you know that day when you felt extra giddy that you don’t even know why – that is probably the most exact explanation that can explain your feelings at the moment. You’ll take it as a calling card for something good that might happened later.

You sit on the bed and ruffle your messy bed-hair, and eyes squint to avoid the sun rays that pierce into the room as you forgot to close the curtain last night. Taking a glimpse, you could see the blue skies, feel the calm breeze softly graze over your skin, and the ambient temperature… it compliments everything.

You’d love for a good starter.

While slipping on your slipper, you take a quick glance at the figure sleeping soundly next to you, with his mouth slightly open, creating soft snores.

A smile crept on your face.

You have always wondered. How can a fully grown-up man still look like a baby when they were sleeping?

Perhaps every single person that you love will always look good no matter what they do. Seeing how calm the man is in his sleep, you wish to crave the image in your memories.

Lightly caresses Jungkook’s hair, you gave him a peck on the cheek. It is still early and you decide to let him sleep in for another minute since he’s probably tired from all of his work.

You tie your hair into a messy bun and were about to leave the bed but Jungkook’s arm swiftly caught you by your waist and pull you until your back hit his bare chest. You yelp as you felt him snuggling closer.

He mumbles something along the line like ‘if you leave the bed, I’ll freeze to death’ which you chuckle and lean your head on top of his bare chest, peppering it with chaste kisses.

It made a wide smile to appear on his face.

Giving the last peck on the tiny mole just right under his left nipple, you then look at him sternly.

“Enough. I need to cook breakfast and clean the house.”

“It’s Saturday,” he whined.

You give him a pat on his shoulder before detangling his arms from your body after so much difficulty.

“I know. That’s why I need to clean up the house. We’re both busy on weekdays and have no time to clean the house. I can even see a thick fine dust in our room.”

He makes a face, still keeping his eyes close and snuggles more into the blanket.

“Will you let me do my chores now, Your Highness?” you joked.

He sighs and points at his left cheek. You knew it was a signal for you to give him a kiss but you pinched his cheek instead and ran out of the room, laughing.

“Wait until I’m all awake!” you heard him holler from inside the room.

You hang the last cloth onto the hanging line before you head inside the house. As you walk past the living room to get into the kitchen where the laundry room is located, your nose crinkle in irritation at the scene in front of you.

On the coffee table, you spot two empty cans of diet cola, an empty packet of chips, and a half-bowl of popcorn.

“Honey, make sure you clean that up, okay. I just finished vacuuming that side an hour ago,” you emphasize it for him to take the hint.

He lifted an OK sign with his fingers but his eyes never left the screen.

You looked at Jungkook sprawls on the couch, looking bored at the tv program with the remote control in his hand. As he was flipping through the channel, you watch as his free right-hand reach over to the bowl and pop a fistful of popcorn into his mouth.

This is strange, you thought to yourself.

For someone who always takes good care of his health, seeing Jungkook munching all of the snacks is still a rare sight for you to see. Usually, he’d been the one who would refuse to eat fried chicken for supper because he doesn’t want to destroy his muscles.

Perhaps today is his cheat day.

You shrug and went back into the kitchen. That is when your jaw dropped for the second time.

“Honey did you… use the microwave for the popcorn?”

He looked over his shoulder, at you. “Yeah.”

“O.M.G.”

You want to laugh. As far as you know, Jeon Jungkook, the man you are married to was never – by never you mean absolutely never – fond of using the microwave because he thought it would explode or something but seeing him with the freshly ‘popped’ corn has caught you in between thoughts.

He wasn’t possibly lying to you this whole time… oh, never mind.

He’d probably found courage from his dream or something so you don’t really want to think a lot about it right now. You wanted to get done with the chores and get some rest.

“Shoot!” he suddenly shouts.

His loud voice sounds alarming that you put down the laundry basket swiftly and make a beeline out of the laundry room towards him in the living room.

“What? What happened?”

He points at the screen and your eyes followed.

“That bulgogi looks so delicious right now.”

Your brows crease as you let his words to digest in your brain. That running is all for nothing. What a waste of breath.

“I thought you injured yourself or something. Honey, you scare me.”

You forget to mention that you married an impulsive person. He loves to do things unexpectedly which is not something new so you didn’t find this quite odd.

“I’ll cook it for today’s lunch then,” you said while thinking of the ingredients in the fridge that is probably enough for you to create the recipe.

You pick up the trash and put away the bowl but he sat up almost immediately and grabs your hand when he saw you putting away his popcorn. “No-” he said with a mouth still full, “Don’t put it away and… I want to eat Bulgogi now.”

You stand straight.

“Honey…” your word trailed off, mouth open and loose like a fish that jumps out of the water as you stare at Jungkook as if he had just grown a pair of golden horns.

“Babe, we have just eaten breakfast about an hour ago, and do you even realize that you’re eating snacks right now?” you ask, hands on your sides.

He looks down to the bowl he snatched from your hand and pout. He put the bowl back on the table and stares at you with his doe-like eyes.

Your breath hitched.

It is your weakness. You always tend to give up whenever he acts cute around you. He used it a lot to get away from trouble whenever you sense one.

“This is a bit weird but I am hungry... again and I don’t know why…” he mumbles.

He himself notices that he is being extraordinarily irritable to you but he also couldn’t find the answer to his strange behavior. All he knows after he had thrown up twice after breakfast, his desire to eat increased almost to the point that he hates and loves it at the same time. It seems like his mind and heart are not on good terms today.

“I’ll cook it for today’s lunch. Not now. Period!” you speak with a stern voice before going back to clean up the mess.

There’s no way you will starve your husband but it makes no sense for a person who always takes care of his body to suddenly change overnight.

You steal a glance at Jungkook, trying to see any hint of weirdness - despite from him already being weird - in case a hungry demon possesses your husband while he is sleeping last night.

“Look at that.” his voice trailed as you followed his eyes to the TV channel again.

“Gosh, that looks delicious.” you heard him.

Reluctantly, you heave a loud sigh.

“Fine. I’ll cook it for you– wipe off your drool!”

It didn’t go unnoticed. With you being a keen observant, it is easy to figure out Jungkook’s peculiar antics today, again, after lunch. Usually, he would help you do the dishes - more like he would just back hug and pamper you with kisses while you were the one doing the dishes - but today, after he finishes the meal, he quickly went into the bedroom and came out ten minutes later with a face pale as if he just saw a ghost lurking around in the bedroom.

You had your brow raised. “You okay? Did you throw up again?!”

He makes an unpleasant expression and you quickly rush to help him settles on the couch. You then took the chance to put the back of your hand on his forehead to feel his temperature but it feels normal that you can’t conclude that he is having a fever. You were about to help him lay down on the couch when he, out of the blue, push your hands away and wrinkles his nose in disgust.

What?

You are shocked, your body went rigid and both hands that he pushes away froze on the spot. It made you lost for words. He turned away slightly, avoiding your eyes. You stood there, the body still half-bent, staring at him without blinking.

Jungkook groans, snapping you out from your thoughts. His face starts to appear a little reddish and skin glistens with sweat that has made you worry but you hesitate for a second.

It was the first time Jungkook ever pushes you away. He is usually the one to initiate intimacy between both of you and when he rejects you, it is sure taking a toll on your emotion.

It feels like your throat is tightening as if you had swallowed a huge golf ball that is hard to pass through. It is hard to admit but sadness flowed through your vein and it is messing up with your mind. You are a little bit confused and hurt of course; contemplating whether you should ignore his antics or do the exact opposite of it.

Back when you were still in college, some students call you land mine. If you miss your step, it will kaboom!

You don’t really show your emotion but if there is something that makes you extremely sad or angry until it reaches your limits, you can blow up, creating a big, big mess.

This whole thing with Jungkook, it upset you, seriously but even he doesn’t know what’s happening to him. You both do get into a lot of fights before marriage but now that you both are tied, you always told yourself to understand that compromise is a necessary part of any successful, enduring marriage. You always stick with the belief that in marriage, two people need to work together as a team and each person must give and take once in a while. You love Jungkook so that’s why you always go with the first option.

Let’s pretend that it didn’t happen.

You are trying to be rational at the moment. Jungkook may be older but it doesn’t mean that he is matured enough (sometimes) during fights. His competitive spirits are out of this world while you are always the forgiving one. It seems unfair sometimes but so far there isn’t any huge problem regarding this and you are pretty much cool about this; only if the problems are tolerable enough for you to take in. You have a deal with much more head-splitting matter even before you met him so it’s easy for you to tolerate with him.

While you are still on freeze, Jungkook then pushes himself to sit and lean his back to the back rest of the couch; his breath quivers in soft, short gasps and eyes completely train on you. It flashes with different sorts of emotions, making you gulp unconsciously.

“Are you okay?” you start off slow when he doesn’t seem to be talking soon.

At your word, he reaches over to hold your hand and you took his action as an apology. He has the soft look that you recognize whenever he is feeling apologetic to you. Knowing that he is not good with words, he always shows it through actions and you appreciate it much, especially in this kind of situation.

“Want to tell me what is going on?” you asked again.

Jungkook pulls you into a hug for just a few seconds before releasing you. The same, disgusted expression plasters on his face again. You pout.

“Why do you smell like trash?”

Blinks.

“Sorry?”

You blink at his sudden question. Contrary to his innocent face, his question has taken you off your feet. You grimace for standing up way too quick, making you a bit dizzy. You compose yourself, try to ease the dizziness. When the sensation is gone, you find yourself glaring at him.

“What do you mean I smell like trash?”

He nods.

“That wasn’t very nice of you.” you mutter, discontent by his word.

Jungkook is currently taking a nap on the couch in the living room. Heavy silence settles all over the house, only the sound of the wind, the trees and rustling of leaves from outside can be heard as you keep the backyard door opened. Usually it would calm you down but today it gives off the feeling for an awkward silence.

You are currently sitting at the dining table, with your laptop, and a few papers work that you think it’d be great if you can at least do some work to kill some time.

You pause your work for a moment and turn to look at your husband on the couch. You will never get yourself used to the image presented in front of your eyes. He looks so peaceful, looks much more normal now. Jungkook’s sharp features are much softer in his sleep. His heart thumps in accordance with slow breaths, his chest rising and falling rhythmically.

Despite that, your mind keeps working madly, making you wonder. There are tons of questions that come into your mind at the moment. What if once he wakes up, he’ll do something weird again? Will there be an explanation for his behavior? Again?

You draw a deep breath, throwing away the negative thoughts you had and just hope for everything will be fine after he wakes up.

As you were about to get yourself another cup of coffee, you heard the beeping sound coming from the front door. On alert, your feet scramble to the front door but before you could see the ‘intruder’ from the peep-hole, someone walks into the house with food containers wrapped in bojagi on both of her hands.

“Mother!” you gasped, rushing to help your mother-in-law.

She smiled when she saw you.

“How are you doing, sweetie?” she greets as you took the items from her hands. You let her take off her shoes while you bring the food into the kitchen.

“Everything is perfectly fine, I guess?” you answered from the kitchen, unsure if your answer is the one she has been wanting to hear.

She stopped to look at her son sleeping on the couch and she clicks her tongue in disapproval.

“Look at him. Useless. How can he choose to sleep while his wife is struggling alone?” she complains.

She went over to him and gave a hard smack on his bottom when the man yelp but he went back to sleep just like nothing happened.

“Why did I give birth to a lazy kid?” she mumbles, walking into the kitchen.

“You brought us so much food. You must be busy this morning. How are we going to finish all of this?”

The elder woman helps you to unpack and store the food she brought into the fridge.

“I cook this,” she pointed at the side dishes she brought, “…and your father-in-law helped me to grill the eels.”

“Speaking of father-in-law, where is he?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know. Perhaps he went to drink rice wine with his friends somewhere around the neighborhood.”

“Day drinking?” you asked, surprised.

Jungkook’s mother scoffed. “You know him! No matter how many times you told him it’s bad for his health, he’ll never listen.”

You bite your inner cheek.

She has been talking about her husband’s bad drinking habit every single time someone talked about him. It always put you in an awkward position. One wrong word could make it difficult for you. You can act silly with your parents but you have no intention to do the same with your parent-in-law. Having them to trust you with their son is already a big honor for you.

“You brought mulberries too?” you decided to change the topic.

“You said you love it when you went to our house at that time.”

“That was around two months ago.”

She nudged your side lightly. “I have quite a strong memory for someone old like me.”

You chortle. “What are you talking about? People used to call you my older sister when I was back at your house.”

You both laughed at that.

It was so long since you visited your in-laws because of your work but you’re glad she is here right now. Her presence can take you off from Jungkook’s ‘problem’ for a moment.

“But you need to hide that. If Jungkook found it, he’s going to eat it. He knows he has severe allergy on berries but he still ate it.”

You nodded, remembering the moment when you and Jungkook first met. It still made your lips curve up at the memories.

It was three years ago, you were hanging out with your friends at your favorite bar when Jungkook approached you (while pretending to be cool) and asked if you’d like to go for another round with him.

He was flirtatious at the time and you find it funny but it was cringe-worthy especially when he reached for your drink for a sip. He was so into himself, oblivious that your drink was black mulberry margarita – which not even a minute later, got him struggling on the wooden floor of the bar, clutching on his throat for help.

It caused quite a scene at the bar with the bright blue and red lights ablaze from the ambulance at such a small alley and paramedics carrying a stretcher with a clumsy man on it who apparently has allergy on berries but completely forgot about it in the sake of flirting with a woman he caught his eyes on.

You and your mother-in-law were chatting at the backyard when your ears caught a crashing sound coming from the kitchen. Your conversation halted, you immediately spring up from your sit.

“What is that sound?” the old lady asked.

“I’ll… go and take a look.”

You rushed inside and straight into the kitchen only to find your husband lying unconscious on the marbled kitchen floor. In a silent panic, your eyes travel to the shattered glass pieces near his place, clear evidence for the crashing sound you heard before.

“H-Honey…” your voice trembles.

You stood frozen at the threshold of your kitchen, unable to move. Your heart starts to beat faster as sweats started to form on your body.

“Oh God!” your mother-in-law rushes past you and crouch at her son.

“Help him, sweetie!”

It was your mother-in-law’s voice that snapped you out from your walls and you rushed to help her by grabbing the broom to swipe away the glasses.

“I think he ate the mulberries.”

The woman sighed in both frustration and also alarmed by the situation. Although she is scared for her son’s health, it is not the first time that Jungkook ever collapsed after eating berries. Even when he was a lot younger, he used to ask help from their neighbor to bring him to the hospital because he didn’t want his mother to get mad at him for eating berries in secret.

“Call 119.”

You stare at Jungkook who is currently resting on the hospital bed after his treatment. The soft snores coming from him tells you that he is doing better now.

“Silly.”

It was exactly as you and your mother-in-law expected.

Jungkook had woken up while you and your mother-in-law were having a conversation in the backyard, totally oblivious at the situation. Jungkook, on the other hand, had found and eaten the berries you had hidden deep inside the fridge which triggers his allergy.

It was a close call but the medical staff manages to soothe his allergy reaction from entering critical state after giving him shots and drawing some blood for proper diagnoses.

“Mrs. Jeon?” the previous doctor visited the bed again with a piece of paper in his hand.

“Um…” you started as he looks up at you.

“You’re talking to two Mrs. Jeon here.” you point at yourself and your mother-in-law.

A loud chortle erupts from him. “Sorry about that. Can I talk to patient Jeon Jungkook’s wife then?”

“Can both of us...”

“Oh, sure.” he nods and moves closer to you while your mother-in-law stands on the side of the bed with ears wide open to hear something from the doctor.

“From the blood sample here,” he points at the paper, “we didn’t find anything that could trigger his nausea as you mention but we found that the patient has an allergy for berries. Are you two well aware of it?” he asks both of you.

“Yes, we…” you glance at your mother-in-law before continuing, “…we knew about that.”

He nods in confirmation and proceeds explaining about the cautious steps you and your husband need to take to reduce his allergic reaction.

Your lips were press into thin line the whole time. This whole situation bothers you.

You had told the doctor that your husband was feeling sick since the morning and had it check just in case it was something serious.

It can’t be. He threw up twice and when the doctor said it was nothing, you just couldn’t get it away from your head. There’s no way a perfectly fine man would throw up for nothing unless Jungkook had been drinking behind your back, probably while you were sleeping, and woke up feeling hangover from the drinks he had.

But it doesn’t seem like that either. You would’ve known it right the moment you wake up.

“You seem to worry about it a lot,” the doctor comments after looking at your trouble face.

“It can’t be nothing. He was fine before breakfast and after that he threw up twice and…” you rake your brain trying to remember anything out of the ordinary that Jungkook did today.

“…ah, he also said I smell like trash.” You unconsciously sulk.

Your words went clearly into your mother-in-law's ear and she gasps dramatically, hands move up to her chest. She looks at her son on the bed and gives a brutal smack on his stomach.

“This brat! How could he say that to his wife?!” she scolds the unconscious man angrily.

The doctor laughs full-bellied at the sitcom playing right in front of him. It was funny to him although he has seen patients get beaten by someone but not by their own mother who is exceptionally protective over their daughter-in-law.

“Mother…” you quickly grab her hand before she could slap Jungkook again. “People are watching.”  

He wipes off the imaginary tears before scanning the paper again, acting like nothing happened.

“He is negative on food poisoning.” he looks at you both, “and from what you had told us, there is nothing that could trigger his nausea unless…”

“Unless?” the older woman inquired.

He smiled knowingly. “Unless he is starting to experience his morning sickness.”

“I have morning sickness?”

You and your mother-in-law jumped on your spots, startled at the intrusion of a new voice joining your conversations.

“Ah, you’re awake.” The doctor said in a matter of a fact tone.

Your eyes went agape at your husband. You were too focused on the conversation that you didn’t even hear him waking up. He’d probably have been listening to everything.

“Are you feeling better?”

You brush some hair out of his eyes as the man observes his surroundings before his eyes fixed on the man in his white attire staring back at him with a serene smile.

“What do you mean I have morning sickness?” he asks the other man, ignoring your question. He just wants to make sure he’s not hearing things.

You turn back at the doctor. “Yes, what do you mean by that?”

He clicks his tongue before securing the glasses on his nose bridge.

“How do I start... okay.  This case is very rare but it is scientifically proven…” he stops to observe your faces but it only leaves a giggle out from his mouth.

The three of you had the same expression (brows knitted and mouth slightly ajar in confusion) that give out the idea that you wouldn’t even understand a word he’s going to say unless he made it short and simple for you to understand. Science is not particularly your favorite.

“Sorry, I’ll try again.” He clears his throat. “So, if the wife is pregnant, the husband can experience morning sickness instead of his wife. It is also called sympathetic pregnancy.”

Jungkook looks at you. He too as confused as you are. There’s a line forming between his eyebrows as you both try to absorb the new information ‘prescribe’ to you.

“My wife’s pregnant?” Jungkook asks.

“We need to test it out before confirming. I’m just stating my conclusion since there is nothing serious found from your blood sample, Mr. Jeon.”

“Babe…” Jungkook suddenly grabs your hand, making you look down at him.

His expression had you under a strange mix of feelings, joy, and uneasiness. He is probably feeling the same as you. You won’t deny that the doctor’s word has caught you feeling excited.

The last time you and your husband tried for a baby was probably a month ago. It could be that you are pregnant. You always have an irregular pattern of your period and seeing that you are not experiencing any morning sickness at all risen the probability.

You try to hide the smile growing on your face.

You’ve always wanted a baby with Jungkook. You both even tried to have a baby when you were still dating but it was vain.

This might be your chance to strengthen your bond with Jungkook, to be tied by a child.

You caught the expression on your mother-in-law’s face. You can tell that she is hoping for the miracle as well.

“If you want to, we can get you tested.”

The weather is gorgeous today. The day looks exactly like the one on your postcards. Baby blue skies came in contrast with various colors of the autumn foliage that strangely fits together perfectly. The air smells crisp and cold with a little feeling of damp and especially more earthy.

However the weather is getting a lot colder as the summer has lost its heat and the cold from autumn is ready to say hello to the world.

You shiver as you approach the door to your backyard.

“Honey, get inside. It’s cold.”

You beckon Jungkook to get inside the house. He is sitting inside the hanging chair while staring at that one pot of strawberry that miraculously survives through the heat of summer and now bearing delicious looking fruits.

Jungkook stands up from his sitting and walks towards your welcoming arms but you stop him when you saw the thing on his hands.

Your brows crease. “Why… are you holding that?”

He looks at the baby shoes you bought yesterday and gives a pat on the embossed decoration of a brown bear on it before smiling.

“It’s cute.”

“I know. But why are you holding it?”

He then shoves the shoes right in front of your face, “It’s for the baby. Look, this is too cute, right?” he asks you to agree with him eagerly.

He looks totally adorable that you wanted to pinch his cheeks.

“I really hope I can get into that weird mind of yours.”

You move into the house and he follows, shutting down the door.

“I’m just… so happy,” he said, hugging the shoes for one last time before putting it back to where it belongs, on top of the shelves, and approaching you.

He pulls you into a hug, with your back sticks to his chest while he rests his chin on top of your head. Back hug is practically easier than normal face-to-face hug since there is a huge obstacle standing in the way.

“Everyone’s happy. I am happy.”

You are genuinely happy.

It turns out that after the pregnancy test, you are positive of pregnant for three weeks. It feels like a huge something has been left off your body for passing level one of marriage life as if a bundle of joy has been thrown to not only both of you but also to the people around you. Your parent, your parent-in-law, and your close friends, they were on cloud nine, congratulating you and your husband for the news.

You and Jungkook spent the next day together, just lying on the bed while hugging each other without any words uttered. There are simply no words to describe your feelings.

Elated, excited, euphoric, you name it.

The both of you spend your days ahead, planning and getting ready for the future, and decided to name the baby Jeon Jungsoo after your last ultrasound scan as the obstetrician confirms that your baby is going to be a boy. You wanted the baby to live an outstanding life, just like his name.

“Today it was just the two of us and next week we are going to have my copycat running around the house,” Jungkook whispers through your hair and tightens his arms around your body.

“I hope he won’t be as naughty as you when you were a kid.”

He pushes you to face him. You chuckle as you saw his face. Pouting and brows knitted. His ‘trademark’ of a sulking face.

“I’m not naughty. Who said that?”

“Your mother.” You stated in a matter of a fact tone.

“Oh…”

His shoulder drops. He can’t argue when the facts came from the truthfully right person that is authorized to say that.

“Will you be a good daddy then?”

His face immediately glows. He snorts, looking haughty all of sudden as he expands his chest like a superhero just saved the day.

“Abso-fucking-lutely,” he whispers at that, afraid that the baby could catch it and come out from you and greets ‘hi, daddy. you are abso-fucking-lutely good looking!’ to him.

“I’ve waited for this my whole life!”

You snicker at that. “Yes, you sure do but I’m the one who has to bear your weird antics for twelve weeks straight, thank you.”

He grins sheepishly, follows you like a lost puppy into the kitchen.

“Sorry about that but aren’t you glad I’m the one having it?”

You had to stop whatever you were doing at the moment at that remarks. You send a piercing glare at him.

“You eat and I throw up. Heh?” he lifts his left shoulder cutely.

“You have the audacity to say that with me looking like this?!” you point at your bloated stomach.

“Try to imagine that you are the one carrying this 25kilos worth of… of watermelon in your stomach, and your kidneys just wouldn’t let you live in peace all day long, and the pain on your back always makes you think back if all of this worth your time and efforts and… and now you’re in your last trimester week and this weird yellow liquid keeps oozing out from your breasts that you need to put tissues on it in order not to stain your shirt like… like… I don’t know. What do you think, Jeon Jungkook? Still thinks that your morning sickness is much worse than all of this?”

You need to catch your breaths after firing each of your words out of your mouth like a torpedo that evidently has hit him direct to the core.

His brain stutters for a moment while every part of him goes on pause while his thoughts try to catch up with every single word. It leaves him speechless and Jungkook mentally admits that he loses. He didn’t even realize he has both arms up in the air as if he is surrendering to you now.

“Happy now?” you snapped, but immediately bite on your lower lip afterward to prevent that smile from escaping.

Gosh, he looks so cute!

“Babe…” Jungkook suddenly calls for you.

“What?”

“You… look so hot right now.”

“F.U Jungkook!”

[rotary-swing]

How To Shift Your Weight In The Golf Swing – Avoiding A Flip

Unlock the secrets of a powerful golf swing! This guide on how to shift your weight in the golf swing provides essential techniques for improving your stability and power. Perfect for golfers of all skill levels, elevate your game and achieve better results today!

[roswellroamer]

Day 12. February 10, 2020. Te Anau day ride. 155km.

Woke to low 40's and gray which made me question the Carrot and Weather Channel apps which had shown 72° and sunny. But closer inspection revealed a marine type layer probably due to the massive lake's shores which was projected to burn off by 11. The kitchen came stocked with farm fresh eggs, bowl of assorted fruit, milk, butter, juice, yogurts, cereals. We set about making some eggs and toast and then of course after finishing off yesterday's blog we grabbed the two frisbees and the "golf course diagram" and headed out. A half life sized chess board on the sprawling manicured lawn provided the tee for the first hole. All the bikes were truck tires with the hole number painted on the rubber. Got to explore their grounds and have some fun tossing the 'bee. We then got into our GoreTex gear and headed towards Milford Sound after a CalTex has stop in town. Knowing we couldn't get to Milford due to road closures/flooding we were aiming for a swing bridge made of three cables. One for your feet and one for each of your hands that spanned the west branch of the Eglinton River. It was featured in one of the NZ touring books I had bought last summer. We saw that the trail sign to identify the turn off was the Earl Mountain turnoff and headed that way. We wound a bit away from the water and gained some elevation and then came to a construction zone. Not being sure if this was related to the recent flooding we got in mine behind a few cars and waited. Maybe less than ten minutes and the opposing truck, bus and camper passed us then we were allowed to proceed. Usually the 120km up to Milford takes over two hours due to the heavy traffic. Top tourist destination in NZ, one road in and out. Lots of buses and cars jockeying to get parking at the roadside attractions. One huge benefit of having the road closed about 75km ahead was that there was hardly any traffic! Great road and scenery as jagged Teton-esque peaks wound into view between the nearly sheer yet forested canyons as we gained elevation. After passing through a few more, wait, take a wild guess... sheep farms 🐑 we came to a diversion. Funneled into a lane off the road to what appeared to be a toll booth, explained to the gal we were in search of a cable bridge off the Earl Mtn. Trail before the closed section. She allowed us to pass. So far so good.

You can tell when you enter Fiordland NP. Sure, there's a sign off to the left (but placed behind a farmer's field/fence so inaccessible for a reasonable picture). But immediately farmland disappears and you are envelopes in the eery dense tunnel of what seems to be darned close to tropical forest. With the 21 feet of annual rainfall being lush shouldn't be a surprise but the immediate drop off in brightness is dramatic as well. Almost like going in a cave. There are some open "flats" but much of the area along the one road there is heavy forest. The other concern for vehicles but especially bikes involves the encroaching algae/moss on the roads. Two tire tracks are largely clear of it but the center of the lanes and the road as well are mostly a bit greenish with the slippery stuff. Lots of "slippery when wet" signage and it wasn't for the Bon Jovi album. I imagined it could be taxing to stay in the worn and clear tire tracks on one of the 250 rainy days. With clear blue sky and dry along with no traffic, the 55,65 and 75kph turns were superb sweepers and we had a ball carving up that road. One of the stops was at Mirror Lakes. Aptly names and even though a couple of fish had disturbed the surface, the pics are keepers. We rode up into Fiordland a ways and then there was the Earl Mtn. sign. We pulled in to the parking area and saw the line of yellow tape across the entrance to the trail. Also no other vehicles were there. The sign said it was closed and also had a few poison signs around the lot. They described the poison that was dangerous to animals and people to attempt (as is often done here) eradication of a non-native predator. In this case it seemed to be some sort of weasel that was endangering a bird that lived on the ground. We had discussed this cable swing bridge and yellow tape and warnings weren't gonna stop us! We worked around the tape and stepped into a dense forest trail. The first 10 minutes took us along an occasionally muddy trail. Tons of tree roots. Most of the deep mud had sticks or small logs tossed in to provide steps but a few ill advised steps resulted in 6" plunges and lovely boot pulling sucking noises to dislodge my Alpinestar SMX-6 from the muck. Then found my way down a thirty foot hill by treading solely on exposed tree roots from one tree! (Pic above) After that, following the well marked red triangular plastic blazes into the heart of Frodo land, the forest was a magic pliant spongy floor. It took a while to figure out that about 6-8" of moss has somehow grown over a network of interconnected tree roots. When I stepped, the entire ground in a five foot radius would give in and move a bit. It was weird and beautiful. After another 10' we heard the Eglinton River and were blocked by some fallen trees and yellow tape. A work around brought me to the river just above the cable swing bridge. A very large tree had fallen on the bridge from our side and collapsed it. Instead of a V shape, the 3 cables were mostly flat but still spanning the river. Ugh. No go. Managed to work our way with some difficulty through the dense brush to get close enough for a pic on the first rung of the bridge which was also the last possible one to reach due to the tree and damage. Pic above. There was a cute little bird on the ground by the bridge remnants. He seemed happy to see us. Wasn't afraid of people evidently as he strutted about watching us, walking under the branch I was balancing on without flying away. He seemed to enjoy company. Said goodbye to my new friend 🐦 and found the blazes trail which included a half dozen improvised detours to avoid deep muck. Scaled up the root ladder which must have been connected to Eywa as the whole forest seemed a bit magical. 🌳 One couple was following our lead to enter the forbidden enchanted forest as we exited. They were disappointed to hear the wire bridge was out. The entire trail from there is about a three hour hike.

I must comment that tons of serious hikers (trampers in local speak) come here and cover long distances. Temps are good. Views and scenery fantastic. None of those deadly spiders and snakes one may encounter across the Tasman Sea in Oz. I get it, just don't love hiking that much to spend days or weeks doing it. This area shows why Peter Jackson used it for LOTR. Nearly pristine and just overwhelmingly stunning. With boots and Klim pants properly mud coated, we were now sweating quite a bit. In fact while holding my Latitude jacket I believe I finally lost my first set of reading glasses on this ride. I have a couple spares but oh well. Think they fell out as I was scaling some of the hill or tree root sections. 👓 I opened up all the vents on my jacket and pants and started the bike to stand and let the 65° breeze do its job. Turned around a couple kilometers further at Lower Holyford Rd. as the heavy machinery was at work. Estimated repair on the sign said that the road would reopen on Friday, four days from now. We stopped a few times on the way back for scenic spots that were too good to pass by. One of the files above is the .gif of some chopper footage. Stopped to watch him load and fly away with a few tanks of what may have been fuel? Most likely bound for Milford Sound which was still isolated from the rest of the country's road system. On one of the last stops Ted must've not closed his bag since when we pulled into Te Anau town center his right saddlebag/pannier was open! Ba quick inventory revealed his polartec jacket and a plastic bag with a wipe were missing. The chain lube that Kiwi gave us as well as a helmet lock were still in the pannier. Those darned side opening clamshell designs! I said I'd get a table at the Ranch outside and wait for him to hopefully retrieve his stuff. I showed him how to flip up on the iPhone to reveal exactly where that last pic was taken. He was just putting on his helmet when a white car pulls up. A guy walks out and hands him his stuff! So lucky. They are bikers and saw his stuff and followed us into town. Nice. After some thank you a they drove away and the day got even brighter. The Ranch delivered me a couple Cokes and an interesting prawn twist dish. 8 shrimp individually wrapped in a long thin dough sheet and fried so the whole 8" long finger is edible and 3 sauces to dip accompanied the serving. Then a calamari salad. 😊 Back to the homestead for some blogging (so I won't fall asleep tonight trying to get this down) and rest before we scored a reservation at the top place in town. The Redcliff cafe. Ted was here last year and unable to get in! We rode to town and were walking down the street when Ted recognized the Aussies who returned his stuff at lunchtime. We turned around and flagged them down. They were perfectly willing to join us for a thank you beer and had a nice time talking with them. They were riders but here to scatter ashes of a friend up north and had received money and were encouraged to make a great trip out of it. They had been to Burt Munro as well. Our appointed hour arrived and we were seated on the back porch of the Redcliff cafe. A few tables of Americans nearby and some conversation with a California couple by us and an excellent meal. I had a salmon tartare dish followed by venison which was amazing and a date and ice cream dessert which were each remarkable. Redcliff did not disappoint. Probably the biggest culinary splurge of the trip. Even with a couple drinks my total ended up being just over $50 and it would've been 50% more for that same meal at home. Had a great evening and got back to the homestead in dusk around 10. Ready to roll northward tomorrow. 😴

[antiques-for-geeks]

LCD Golf Games

Somebody, somewhere has to review these things?!

OK, first a little context. While my wife was in hospital waiting for the arrival of our daughter my brain desperately looked for some sort of worry release valve in the long hours between hospital visits. I did what any normal man would in this situation. I set about trying to put together the best damn collection of handheld LCD golf games the world has ever seen! They were mysterious! (nobody was interested enough to discuss them). They were plentiful! (as unwanted gifts often are). They were super cheap! (the sellers could barely give them away). Now, a couple of years later I have a happy and healthy daughter but also, crucially, a box full of assorted unplayed handheld golf games.

…and I’m going to tell you lucky people all about them!

Outside of the Nintendo’s Game and Watch series, LCD handheld games are often disregarded in the world of retro gaming. In a lot of cases this is fully justified; they lack the appealing mini-arcade aesthetic and bright colours of the larger tabletop VFD games, and there’s so much low quality landfill to be found, especially in some of the later licensed efforts from companies like Acclaim and Tiger. Let’s be honest - we only ever played them for want of something better.

Despite this I still find something fascinating about the attempt to create engaging gameplay using such limited technology. LCD games can only display their images in a series of fixed positions, so that’s a pretty severe limitation. This goes doubly for something like showing an 18 hole golf course with a variety of hazards like bunkers and lakes. Yet here are a handful of games that attempt to do just that - recreating your favourite ruined walk with what amounts to a slightly beefed up watch display.

Pro Golf 

Bandai / 1985

The first, and earliest of my collection is this effort from Bandai, a well respected and prolific handheld game maker back in the 80’s. Many of these golf games were aimed squarely at the bored executive market, and were therefore often found in plastic-leather slip cases. This one has a nice little ring bound course guide attached, filling in the details that an LCD display can’t. This is definitely the simplest of these games; your only input is to select your club and time the swing. There are no complications like shot positioning, wind direction or the camber of the green to contend with. The courses do have a selection of water hazards and bunkers to avoid. This simplicity really works in the game’s advantage, because there’s a pretty clear relation between what you think should happen and what gets shown on the screen.

All these games seem very similar when it comes to taking a shot, with a single action button. You press the button, you see your little LCD golfer take his swing, you press again (or maybe release) at the end of the up swing to select power, then again when the downswing reaches the ball for accuracy. Between this and club selection there’s enough going on to make this 100 times more engaging than what the majority of arcade style handhelds could offer at the time. It’s also worth noting that all these golf games have a two player mode where each player alternates their shot, adding to the longevity. In a twisted sort of way golf is the perfect subject for the humble handheld!

Despite this I would like to see you have tried to make me choose this over my Astro Wars tabletop back in 1985.

Summing up, there’s enough variety for this to have been a decent time waste on a long train journey (assuming you didn’t hate golf) and the graphics are nice and clear. The sound is just beeps and a crappy tune, but you can switch if off to avoid a riot in the quiet coach. A thumbs up!

World Challenge Golf 2 

Bandai / 1991

Here’s another effort from Bandai, and this one is quite a bit more involved. It’s stored in another leatherette slip case …but this time there’s a set of laminated cards provided, with the hole numbers written on each side. One end of each card has a background for the course, with the par and length to the pin, as well as a small map. The other end has the layout of the green, with some arrows showing which way it runs. Before playing each hole you slide these cards into a slot so they show behind the LCD screen, providing scenery ‘graphics’. This is exactly the kind of thing I find very cool about old tech - an ingenious solution to get around the inherent limitations of the LCD handheld. Ignore the fact that the classic Gameboy had already been released by this point and Nintendo’s Golf kicks all of these dedicated handhelds right into the gutter… using laminated cards as the background is awesome, and should be applauded.

Anyway, back to the game, you can now select shot direction, though in a very limited way. You can also see where you ball lies on the small course map, though the 3D view of the course and the swinging golfer are smaller and less detailed than the earlier game. Once you get to the green, you can see the ball position in a top-down view against the background card, and need to adjust for the camber.

Despite my admiration for the sheer ingenuity shown by this game, I have mixed feelings about it. It feels like the designers have bitten off more than they can chew. It is playable, but in trying to provide all the features of a fully fledged computer golf game it only highlights the fact that you’re not playing something better. It’s also significantly less easy to pick up and play than before.

Despite my misgivings, I like this one a lot as a collectible curiosity and it does come the closest to feeling like you’re actually in control of where the ball is going on the course. The sound is still beeps and a crappy tune which can be turned off.

Championship Golf 2

Radio Shack / Tandy / Late 1980’s?

I’ve seen various different re-branded versions of Radio Shack’s Championship Golf, but this one is a larger two screen effort, with individual buttons for club selection. No slip case this time, but it does have a built in screen protector with the course maps in a pouch on the underside. It’s less pocketable than the Bandai games but on the upside it takes AAA batteries, and it feels robust and well built. This one has 2 different 18 hole courses - apparently these are Japan and the USA. You can’t see storks dipping in ornamental koi ponds in Japan or try to nail Trump with a wayward drive in the USA, but the course layouts do change. The left screen shows a top-view of the course, while the right shows the traditional behind-the-golfer view.

You can’t select the shot direction, though your shot can wander into the rough if you mistime your button press on the down stroke. Though the golfer view is slightly lacking in detail, you’re shown exactly where your ball is on the overhead map screen, and this really adds to the playability. There is a wind indicator, but it’s only ever toward you, behind you or calm.

This is a really nice effort, with most of the simplicity of the earlier Bandai game, but with sensible additions to add some extra depth.

The sound is still beeps and a crappy tune which can be turned off.

Tournament Golf 

Radica / 1999

This Radica unit has a nice big screen, with lots of detail on the golfer and the course, though I don’t like the plasticy case much - I miss the fake leather and solidity of the earlier games! The swing button is shaped like a golf ball, and is fairly satisfying to press. There are 4 different courses to play though, which is very generous.

The representation of the golfer’s swing is the best yet here, with a large and very clear meter prominent in the bottom right of the screen. This shows power, indicates fade and draw (your shot veering left and right) and gives a power indicator for putting. This game features a really detailed wind effect, with direction and strength. The wind even changes as you wait to take your shot for extra realism. Choosing power and correcting left and right for the effect of the wind should a lot to this game, but the limitations of that LCD display spoil the effect for me. Because there’s no overhead course view it’s quite hard to reconcile what you can see on the screen with what’s happening in the game, and that really matters when you’ve got so many game variables to deal with. It’s also a pig to time a shot when you’re close to the pin without pinging out the other side.

One excellent feature of this game is the sleep mode. There’s no off button, but if you leave it alone for a minute the screen turns off, and you can pick up your game at a later time. This is perfect for gaming on the go.

I’m perhaps being unduly harsh, but this is probably my least favorite so far. Despite the clear graphics and greater complexity it lacks the charm of some of the earlier efforts.

On the up side, this one at least has a digitised swoosh when you hit the ball. You’ll still want to turn it off though…

Talking Golf Master

Systema  /1997

On to the final of our selection of games, this effort is from Systema, a well known maker of really average LCD games. This one has a plastic flip cover, with course maps and club distances on the inside. It doesn’t exactly feel premium, sharing that cheap plasticy feel with the Radica game. Worse, the action buttons are recessed little behind the cover, making it slightly awkward and uncomfortable to press them. I figure LCD game designers had given up trying to impress anyone by the mid 90’s.

The game itself is largely OK, with a very basic direction control and simple wind conditions, but the graphics are about as basic as the two screen Radio Shack game, without the benefits that the overhead course screen brought. The sound seems to be a real selling point for Systema, but it’s irritating beyond belief, with constant super loud bleeps punctuating your play. There are some sound samples; a brief compressed second of bird song or occasional encouragement from your caddy. You’re sure to love the attention you get on the bus as he waxes lyrical about how good your hole was.

You can turn it off, and you’ll want to. I’d give this one a miss.

The 19th Hole

At last we’ve come to the end of our review! Back to the clubhouse for a steak pie... I feel like a complete golf casualty now. The games can lie safely in their boxes for another few years. My daughter is sure to love LCD golf time with daddy, no?

[dorseygordon68-blog]

Power Rangers Zeo (Heather Ray).

The other night I sat with my family members around the table reminiscing and also telling old stories. We worked with our golf swing with equipment that measured our power in watts, and also took advantage of the complete line of Kinesis makers (their unique resistance cables allow for better series of activity). Power is depicted here as a shaping pressure, capable of generating its very own authenticity - whether it be possessed by mine proprietors, absentee companies, local elites, or even union bosses. The functional power cleaner provides a performance of a commercial equipment that utilizes 3.0 kilowatts induction motor with its 3 axial-piston brass pumps that helps generates an astonishing 2300 PSI stress power blasting 10 liters per minute water circulation. Microsoft billionaire Expense Gates has actually stated there is a 10% chance kite power can be the magic remedy" for international renewable energy demands. Additionally it has some filler which is unusual since this flick is hardly 80 mins which most likely offers you a respectable concept of how little possible the story has in this flick to be any kind of good. The fundamental structure was integrated in a workshop outside the city and then lifted right into the Colosseum by a giant crane. In http://verde-dieta.info/prolesan-pure-recenzii-pret-cum-functioneaza-recenzii-unde-sa-cumparati/ acquired rival chain LA Health and fitness as well as struck up a collaboration with Olympian Sir Chris Hoy, that is a special adviser as well as brand ambassador" to Pure Health club. Stories of the trip over and how thrilled he was to discover everything on the big ship (a seafarer, making the most of his inquisitiveness, convinced him to lift some papers pushing deck, to see what was below ...). Stories of working as a journeyman footwear technician in cities and communities across upstate New york city as well as Ohio (in one store, the foreman placed my grandfather and his turret in the front window so passers-by would quit to view exactly how quick as well as well he did his job). On the one hand, it consists of passages that John S. Wright could have written, as when it emphatically mentions, Chicago is currently facing the momentous truth that fifty years for this reason, when the children of to-day are at the elevation of their power as well as influence, this city will be bigger than London: that is, bigger than any existing city." On the various other hand, it declines the concept that the city's success can or should be assessed in terms of numbers alone, or that the future would certainly care for itself. Starting with our original list of about 51 health clubs (assembled from our round-up of the very best gyms of 2013, publicly available statistics, as well as other expert lists), we asked you to elect your favorites - likewise enabling write-in ballots to make up any type of health clubs that weren't pointed out on the initial listing. As soon as and also they don't have to all be on the same team either, you do not have to strike a fitness center alone; multiple individuals can attack a fitness center at. EPA established that the combination of utilizing of smokestack controls as well as contamination credit histories from shifting generation amongst plants makes up a well-demonstrated system of discharge reduction, one that is commonly utilized by the power industry both to meet inner targets and also prior government and also state guidelines. Freely based upon real occasions, Funny of Power had its North American launching at the 2006 Tribeca Film Festival. The platform lift can be found in a huge range of different models, each one with various attributes that make it far better fit for a details sort of job. Les plates-formes Power Plate ® constituent une parfaite alternate put les personnes actives qui n'ont pas beaucoup de temps à consacrer à un entraînement trois fois the same level semaine, voire plus. Control is a crucial element of the lift system and because of this they commonly provide power assisted drive. Some health clubs only enable teens to workout in the assigned youth facility area, while other gyms permit teens the exact same freedom to make use of the equipment as the adults. The originator of this franchise business identified that there was a huge market for a gym such as Curves and undoubtedly has taken advantage of a found diamond. You might be missing out if you are guilty of wrapping up your health club session as well as avoiding out on a cool down or stretch. Keltner's research suggests that women are not immune from this mystery, which claims that the very qualities that help us look for power-like beauty, compassion, or humbleness -are the ones that having power could harm. The power in an organization lies with supervisors and managers who have actually been enabled within the business framework, to make sure that the company could operate effectively. However nonverbally presenting power during the interaction - now that's an additional thing with different prescriptions and also end results. By the end of March, president Peter Roberts believes Pure Gym will have surpassed the 103 total of UK gyms run by Virgin Energetic, the present primary driver. This stair lift has a lifting ability of 300 lb or 136 kg. A flip-up swivel seat that secures placement and also constant stress buttons are various other functions of this straight stair lift. While a lot of exclusive health clubs serve teenagers and grownups, a couple of select health clubs just enable teens. Picked this for ideas to supplement my barbell-based routine, for when I can not get to the health club, and to help my wife with suggestions to do in your home & health club. His afternoon training sessions at the gym have actually permitted more youthful fighters to work along with a master, as well as interested onlookers to see. Teaching your staff members all facets of power device training as well as security could minimize the opportunities of injury and also maintain your workforce effective as well as risk-free. The fitness center consists of weights, cardiovascular tools, security balls, machines and also resistance bands. Mirrors on all walls do not simply mimic the look of many health clubs - they actually make the room look bigger. A new wave of thinking of power exposes that it is offered to us by others as opposed to got. There are few better exercises for targeting full-body power compared to the medicine-ball bang. Most of the gyms need their participants to abide by the laws to be able to go into and utilize the facilities. No, in spite of prominent notions and the common urban legends, Pfeffer competes that the path to power is substantially various than the prominent concepts we were raised to believe. If you see that you are obtaining squeezed in order to spend for your fitness center Sydney subscription then you are bound to pull out after a few days. It is just a partial settlement to know that the paradox also implies that political hopefuls such as Donald Trump - angry, manipulative harasses - are less likely to acquire power to start with. If you are presently not making use of any kind of sort of eco-friendly power and intend to conserve electricity, you could still decrease your costs by disconnecting unutilized home appliances. Greetings Diona", he claimed pleasantly, as he came level with her, making her once more so aware of his figure as he looked down upon her. After years of lack of exercise, Ashley returned as the Yellow Space Ranger to help the Galaxy Rangers battle the Psycho Rangers. Individuals who pledged to stroll were 3 times more likely to show up vs. those just saying they would stroll. From scenting too excellent to filling out a large dimension water bottle when there is a line of people behind you, read on to see if you're guilty of any one of these 16 health club pet dog peeves. The Gym stated the variety of inexpensive health clubs across the country had enhanced to 319 this year from 58 in 2011. That said, the plot brings me to my 2nd problem - one which maintains Absolute Power from being a 5-star book. The health club also contains 450 items of cardio workout tools as well as dumbbells and makers. Yes, you heard me. We're paying triple numbers a month and also struggling atop lunar looking equipment in order to replicate easy youth searches like jumping rope, hula hooping and also playing tag. After the Power Rangers involve her rescue, she goes back to being the principal of Reefside High and is disclosed to have actually been a close personal good friend of Anton Mercer. Raise takes us on an enlightening scenic tour through time, starting with the ancient Greeks, who made a cult of the body-- words gym derives from the Greek word for naked"-- as well as following Roman legions, middle ages knights, Persian pahlevans, as well as eighteenth-century German gymnasts.

[j0ebay]

Spiraling Ch 2

Peter Parker x Stark!OC, platonic!Loki x Stark!OC

Warning(s): IW SPOILERS, mentions of blood, fighting, lowkey angst, fluff

Word Count: 2321

A/N: So, this basically takes place after infinity war assuming all the dead people come back. Maggie is highkey based off of Maggie Greene/Rhee from Walking Dead because I love her so so so much. I’m really stoked this chapter is finally out so enjoy and feedback is deeply appreciated!! 💙💙

series masterlist

add yourself to my taglist!!

chapter 1   chapter 3

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams” -Dr Seuss

To say Geneva lived by the phrase “Just because something isn’t broken, doesn’t mean it can’t be fixed” would be an understatement. She was constantly finding ways to decrease reaction time and upgrade suit abilities. Geneva mainly took pride in Karen, given that it was the first “big project” Tony let her work on and everyone knows how well that worked out.

    So, there was Geneva sitting in a desk chair in the lab coding updates for Karen. Her long brown hair was pulled up into a ponytail as she was squinting through her tortoise shell glasses that perfectly framed her face as she worked. The works of AC/DC could be heard throughout the whole building and everyone knew this was how she concentrated and drowned out the malicious head voices. It also drowned out the sound of Tony walking into the lab.

    “Hey Gee” he says, getting no answer from the teenage girl, deep in concentration. He tries again “Geneva” this time a little louder. Still nothing. Frustrated, he yells “GENEVA MARIE STARK” which caused her to jump and turn around. The music paused on it’s own with the stereo remote across the room. Tony knits his eyebrows together in confusion and she just points to her head, saying “I’m kinda trying to get everything back and figure everything out”. He nods and says “You mind picking up some files and groceries for me?”

    She bites the inside of her cheek in thought. She really should finish this up. She’s almost done making reaction times quicker. Geneva takes her glasses off and puts her face in her hands “Yeah I can”. She taps a few keys on the computer, saving her work, stands up and walks past Tony who says “Address and list are already on your phone, thanks”

    Peter stands at his locker shuffling through his belongings when he hears his name being called in the distance. He closes his locker door to reveal the one and only Ned Leeds. “Hey, Peter! We’re still on for tonight right?” Peter nods and then his eyes widen in realization “If it’s cool, I invited Gee to help out. She’s really good at chemistry and knows more than the both of us.” Ned laughs and shakes his head “You still believe she’s real? Peter she doesn’t exist” “What?” Flash steps into the conversation as he walks by “We’re talking about Peter’s imaginary girlfriend again?” Peter lets out a heavy sigh and directs his gaze to the tile floor, shaking his head “Cause we all know you’re not gonna get one Penis Parker” He continues walking away along with messing up Peter’s hair. He takes out his phone and is about to text Gee when the hairs on his arm stick up. His eyes widen as he bolts outside to see what’s wrong. He sprints around the school after texting May to see what’s wrong. Nothing was around the school and May texted back saying she was fine. “What is going on?” he continuously asked himself until he realized the one thing left on his radar. Geneva.

    The one thing Tony didn’t know about sending Gee on errands is that they almost always take her through the bad part of town. That’s where she found herself now. She put in earbuds and pretended to listen to music so she could avoid all the people catcalling her. “The convenience store is on the next block. The convenience store is on the next block” is what she always tells herself. It seemed as if the street keep getting longer and longer the faster she walked. “Hey, pretty girl” she heard from her right side. She kept walking, slightly picking up the pace. She felt someone behind her as her pace quickened again, speeding up to just a little bit under a jog. “Cutie can’t even take a fucking compliment, she’s too shy” She hears another man say until she gets cut off by third man. “Where do you think you’re going, Princess?” A lump the size of a golf ball forms in her throat as she mumbles “the store”. A meaty hand lands on her face, squishing her cheeks together and forcing her to look up at him.

“Whaddya doin’ out here in the middle of the day all by yourself?” The grip on her face tightens as another one grabs her waist. Gee gulps and says “I don’t want any trouble”. The three men surrounding her all laugh wildly. “You don’t want any trouble? You aren’t from around here, little miss, I can tell you that right now. You look you come from money, got any for us?” The adrenaline begins to course through the teenager’s veins by just saying one word “No.” They all laugh again. “That wasn’t a question, little girl.” her backpack was ripped from her as she screams “NO” again before taking a punch to the stomach. Geneva falls to the ground as they kick her until she sees the lid of a garbage can. She concentrates less on the blows to her gut and more on bringing the lid over. There was a loud clank and the main guy fell to the ground along with the lid. One of the other guys hits the wall with the flick of her wrist and the third, and final guy charged at her getting a blow to her face in. Geneva was knocked back a little bit as the guy swings again, she dodges and elbows him in the head causing him to fall down.

    Out of nowhere Geneva hears a faint pssst and looks up to see a web at the top of the wall along with the one and only spider-man. “Gee you okay?” He asks climbing down to face her. She holds her eye in pain saying “Yeah yeah I’m good” while turning to continue walking. “Well, at least let me walk you home.” She stops and sighs. “I still have errands to run, spidey. Besides, shouldn’t you be in school right now?” He scratches the back of his neck and says “don’t worry about it. I can get May to say it was a family emergency or something” She turns back around, “Actually?”. He nods and catches up to her. “So, what errands you got in mind?”

    “Hey Maggie!” Geneva says as she walks into her favorite convenience store, still holding her eye with Peter (who insisted on making a pit stop to change out of the spidey suit because “You walking around with spiderman is just gonna put a bigger target on your back”). Maggie is the owner of the small store that Geneva visits constantly, causing a friendship to spark. “The usual, Gee?” She asks not looking up. Geneva lets out a little laugh “Yeah I gotta get some stuff for Tony too. Maybe some ice would be great.” She looks up with a confused look on her face until she sees Geneva holding her eye “OH MY GOODNESS WHAT DID YOU DO?”. It’s like a switch flipped in the woman as she instantly speed walks around getting paper towels and an ice pack, giving them to Gee.

    “Seriously, I’m fine it just stings a little.” Gee says while taking the ice “No concussion, no nothing” Maggie turns her attention to the boy with her “Who’s this?”. Geneva furrows her eyebrows in confusion before she remembers Peter. “Oh! Maggie this is Peter”. Her eyes widen “THIS IS THE PETER YOU WERE TELLING ME ALL ABOUT???” Geneva instantly remembers gushing about Peter to Maggie and looks down at the floor hiding her rosy cheeks. “Yeah um,” She gulps “I’ll just grab whatever Tony wants and you said you have the sour gummy worms and cream soda?” Maggie nods and says “They’re in the back. Lemme get ‘em for you”

    After shopping and a bit more walking, Geneva and Peter return to Stark Tower (after relocating...again). She steps out of the elevator seeing Tony on the couch watching TV, puts the bag of groceries on the table along with the files and says “Here’s your bitchass stuff” while storming off to the bathroom to get some peroxide on her cuts. Hissing in pain, she lifts up her shirt to reveal her abdomen, which already started the bruising process “Shit. No crop tops for a while, Stark”

    After cleaning herself up even more, dealing with worried Pepper, Tony and (especially) Loki, and begging Happy to drive her, Gee was finally ready to go to Peter’s for another study session. “Thank you Happy!” she says getting out of the car once they reach the Parker residence. She lets out a small giggle at his grumbled “yeah sure whatever” as he drives away.

As she walks up the steps to the apartment, she’s instantly greeted with a hug from May before she could even knock on their door. “He’s just in his room with Ned, sweetheart”. Gee nods and walks into Peter’s room. “Hey guys!” She says and instantly Peter stands up from where he’s sitting and wraps her in a hug. The two teenagers instantly become flustered at the feeling of holding and being held by each other and pull away with blush creeping on their faces. “Uh, Gee this is Ned.” She lets out the giggle Peter finds always infectious and asks “The one who doesn’t believe in me?” He nods and she sticks her hand out to Ned “Geneva Stark, nice to meetcha”. Ned’s eyes go wide as he stumbles over his own words “uh, y-you’re actually a-a real person. Oh my god I-I’m so sorry I didn’t think you were real. I-It’s just you see a lot of news that’s fake” She laughs again “It’s fine, really. I swear, half the population thinks I’m a myth.”

    In reality, the “study session” was about 20 minutes of actual studying and then Star Wars. Peter leans over to Geneva, who’s emersed in the movie and whispers “I’m sorry”. She turns her head and furrows her eyebrows. “What for?”. He looks down “I didn’t get there fast enough and you got hurt. It’s all my fault”. Geneva turns so she faces Peter “Hey, look at me,” she takes his face in her hands, forcing his gaze towards her “If anything, it was my fault for being a jackass towards them. Actually, let’s just blame Tony for this one cause he’s the one who sent me out in the first place. But, it was a learning experience more or less. I can move things with my mind easier than I could before. Besides, I wasn’t hurt terribly, just some bruised ribs and maybe a black eye at the most. Nothing terrible, nothing permanent, but thanks for being there, Pete.” She slips her hand in Peter’s giving it a tight squeeze and flashes him a warm smile. The small moment is ruined by Geneva’s phone ringing. She answers, talks for a bit then hangs up “It’s Pepper. She wants me home and I guess there’s a pissed off Happy outside” She stands up, Peter and Ned following. Peter lets out a chuckle “The real question is, when is Happy not pissed off?” Geneva burst out laughing making Peter’s eyes light up and a confused expression to cross Ned’s face. “I swear,” she says, “I’ve lived with them for three years and I’ve never ever seen that man crack a smile! Well, it was nice meeting you Ned” she waved at him and pulls Peter in for a hug “Bye, Pete” she says, pulls away and waves while walking out the door.

    “Dude,” Ned says once the door shuts “you totally have a crush on her.” Peter feels a knot in his stomach and lets out a nervous laugh “What? No what are you talking about?” He feels the heat rise in his cheeks. “Peter, c’mon you totally like her. You walked her home today despite her insisting she was fine and just now you were totally heart eyes over her.” Peter scoffs “I was not heart eyes over her” “Ooh! Are we talking about Peter’s crush on Geneva? Shoot did she leave already?” May butts into the conversation. “Yeah, May she did and I DON’T HAVE A CRUSH ON HER! I mean seriously, Mr.Stark would kill me if he found out I like her” May’s eyes widen as she screams “PRESENT TENSE! PRESENT TENSE!”, followed by Ned saying one last “You totally have a crush on her. My mom’s here I’ll see you later.” Peter and Ned do the handshake and after Ned leaves, Peter glares at May. The rosy color lingers on his cheeks as May grabs him by the shoulders and states “It’s perfectly fine if you do like her. She’s a very lovely person and you shouldn’t be afraid of that Tony Stark” He purses his lips and says “Thanks, May. I’m gonna go to bed.” while walking away hearing a “goodnight” behind him.

    Peter crawled into bed and stared at the ceiling, deep in thought. He envisioned her hazel eyes and how they got really small when she smiled. He flashed back to every time he made her laugh and smiled at the sound running through his mind. He thought about her hair and how it perfectly framed her face, her style and how it screamed her personality and her glasses, which no matter how many times she made comments about ugly she looked in them, he would always be dying to tell her that she was wrong. He mentally cursed at himself for not getting to her sooner but boy, she could kick some ass. He processed his feelings of hurt and heartbreak whenever she was sad or got in a fight. Peter Parker had finally come to a conclusion about his feelings for Geneva Stark. “Mr.Stark is gonna kill me” he mumbled before drifting off to sleep with her on his mind.

TAGS: 

EVERYTHING: @og-baby-ob14 @were-all-gay-down-here @softiespidey @saturn-aka-six

SPIRALING: @upsidedownparker @bagelbiites @spidergirl192327 @theasexualbunny  @nerdofthehighestcalibre

[rotary-swing]

How To Shift Your Weight In The Golf Swing – Avoiding A Flip

Looking to improve your golf game? Mastering the technique of weight shifting is crucial for a powerful swing. In the blog post "How To Shift Your Weight In The Golf Swing" on Rotary Swing, you'll discover expert insights and practical tips that can transform your approach to hitting the ball.

[christhatcher]

11 from 2017

Holden – The Animal Spirits

What a time to be alive!

Musically speaking. Great swathes of musical history lie just behind our little Black Mirrors (is there a more perfect summation of our relationship with technology than the phrase ‘Black Mirror’?… thanks Charlie Brooker). Previously, styles were pegged to moments, and evolution and revolution, inspiration and reaction took their turns gathering acolytes and detractors. But the Black Mirrors have done for that nice neat musical timeline and brought disparate styles within touching distance and enabled previously unthinkable musical bedfellows to spoon and make the beast with two backs at their leisure. It’s a freedom from purity that makes musical stews like Animal Spirits as inevitable as those monkeys with typewriters eventually turning in some Bard. Fantastical technology, older technology, rudimentary technology and the absence of technology repeatedly collide on this album, synthesisers sound like they’re genuinely trying to imitate the random patter of chimes and bells, graceful chord patterns churn in endless loops and wind instruments and wordless incantations bubble around the mix. An Esoteric Albion Rave Mixtape. With added Krautrock and Free Jazz and Aphex Twin and Prog and what can only be described as an Earthy quality (Earth as in grit and ooomska, Earth as in one of the Four Elements). It’s an amazing thing that manages to sound like everything and nothing at once, but it does beg the question:

What time are we alive?

Genres don’t explode out of nowhere very often any more, haven’t, for almost the last two decades, given their times a distinct flavour (compare and contrast with… oh, all the usuals). Do we live in an age of eternal musical re-hash or in an age of ever more imaginative re-combinations of existing styles? It’s not a major challenge - to be poured over by the Boffins for the sake of humankind’s future - But I’m guessing that the (probably already made) ‘Sounds of The Naughties’ is destined for a full blown identity crisis when it does emerge (if it hasn’t already). On the flip side, the overall quality and quantity of new music hasn’t dropped. And in answer to the question, What time are we alive? I’d argue that we might as well concede that Space/Time doesn’t like a straight line, musical or otherwise, that we need to get to grips with the cyclical nature of Things and that we should probably accept that we’re at the point where All The Music is getting thoroughly blended up as it spirals ever closer to the Event Horizon of a Great Musical Black Hole… Who knows what will spill out on the flip side? Maybe we’ve already ejected and The Animal Spirits is an emergent howl… something with distinct traces of Human, but augmented, magick and operating in ALL the dimensions, not just our earth bound ones. What A Time To Be Alive!

Space Witch - Arcanum

Speaking of Space/Time. Did I ever tell you about the time that Hawkwind found themselves at a loose end in the Midlands with nothing but a stash of Mandrax for company? Thought not. Well, they downed the lot and were about halfway through rehearsing Doremi Fasol Latido (during Lord of Light according to Wykypedia) when two things happened. 1) The Lemmons kicked in and 2) Brian Blessed, with little else to do and generally on the faff, stopped by and, infuriated by Dave Brock’s laconic delivery, decided to give some impromptu elocution lessons. The laws of Space/Time couldn’t handle the at odds ripples set off by a heavily sedated Hawkwind rubbing up against a Brian Blessed enraged by poor enunciation. During the first third of a critically lysergic rendition of Time We Left This World Today, the fabric of Space/Time ripped open like soggy kitchen towel and flung the results ‘forward’ into the future, emerging first in 1980 - where Brian briefly took the form of Prince Vultan in a film adaption of Flash Gordon – before shuddering to halt like an ectoplasm blancmange hitting a wall, in 2017. At this point the whole temporal merry-go-round-the-bend took the name Space Witch and spat out a child called Arcanum.

The Cosmic Dead – Psyche is Dead

Did I ever tell you about the time that a consignment of Monster Magnet’s Tab EP (it’s basically an LP) got washed up in Glasgow and Customs & Excise officers became embroiled in a game of Cat & Mouse with a bunch of local stoners who half inched a few cases, ostensibly because tradition states that Tab must be played as a first dance song at a local wedding? No? well… along with that definitely happening, I should probably point out that, unlike the plot of Whiskey Galore (which this story has up until now utterly coincidentally borne a passing resemblence to) the Customs and Excisists actually did round up all the copies prior to said nuptials. But. As it transpires. Not before a few of the ushers had had a listen through and decided that it wasn’t really a brutal enough listening experience and could do with a few less notes. So they dropped all but two notes and proceeded to played a game of musical chicken, whereby the first person to progress from the first note to the second would be… phhhhhhhh… I don’t know… just called a lightweight or something. Unfortunately the three pieces of music they’d prepared did not go down well at the wedding, even though one of them was actually quite beautiful, in the way that maybe Boards of Canada* are beautiful. The assembled Aquarian Noodling Muso Soup loving guests might have been mortified, but the experience was a proper Road to Domestos moment for The Cosmic Dead. They’d seen the truth behind the Haight Asbury tinted spectacles. They had given the newly betrothed Psyche. And it had Died. Psyche Is Dead was born.

*Boards of Canada might be a bit of a leap, but it’s genuinely the first thing that popped into my head when I last listened to the title track, and I can’t be arsed to try and avoid a tenuous comparison: we live in such a plural musical world now, the musical evolutionary tree is way passed the point that it can be pruned and indexed back into £50 man-style shape and order, let’s face it, who’d want to? Embrace the chaos (See The Animal Spirits).

Oh Sees - Orc

See that Orc on the cover of Orc (below), he’s the guy who made this album. They’re spikey, Orcs, both personality wise and physically, and it comes across in the music. Those boney fingers and sharp but fraying nails wring gnarly, scuffed riffs out of guitars stored in damp and dank. They also have a problem regarding attention span and the only way to keep Orcs on track, as is widely known by those in the know, is to employ two drummers to keep pace and hope that they tangle together like creepers vying for the same patch of sky. You can’t be a creature from the realms of Fantasy Fiction and not adopt some of the trappings of a Prog act, and this particular Orc appears to have decided that the two drummer approach is the most appropriate nod to that ouvre; it makes for some frenetic, seat of the cod piece, extended instrumental work outs, brought (presumably) to a close by some form of sacrifice or the booming exhortation of a wizard in the studio control room. There’s definitely a human aspect to an Orc’s voice, so the melodies are recognisable and at times sit about where you’d expect. However, all that time around fires of unknown origin, with just bare branches, mist and the detritus of deep forest for furnishings, has rendered their voices ragged and ever verging on hysteria – liable to take fright (screech) or fight (bellow) at any moment. Imagine trying to sing a lullaby with all those needling teeth. Never going to happen. Lyrically, Orcs have a tendency towards understated reportage of their everyday lives, “Let's witness the whole occasion, Piles of bodies fill the garden, Smash the hedgerow with their plummet, Stop with panic, ugly banquet. Floating in the vile moat yeah, Crack their skulls upon the cobbles, Ringing home their lemming's message, Fill the streets with awful messes.”. They don’t really do braggadocio or anything as flowery as metaphor either, and sometimes just sing to-do lists “Old is warrior drink the poison, I am warrior crush your head in”. They do love smashing heads in and this album makes an excellent accompaniment to said act.

Jarvis Cocker and Chilly Gonzales - Room 29

For this song cycle about the Chateau Marmont Hotel, Hollywood, Jarvis Cocker splits the difference between the kitchen sink magician fronting Pulp and his role as narrator of the nocturnally themed Radio 4 show Wireless Nights. An embarrassment of lyrical riches leap out as he pillow talks the exploits and tumults of famous patrons, ruminates on the way Hollywood is buoyed along by our suspension of disbelief and spills beans that can only sprout from time alone in a hotel room (if you want to read that as a euphemism, then it wouldn’t hurt). He’s part raconteur, part sage, part documentarian delivering filthy one liners the other side of a comma from heartbreaking observations. All the above is underscored by Chilly Gonzales’ minimal piano, occasional strings and the odd sound effect. It’s a perfect musical accompaniment that puts you right there, in the hotel, wandering the lobby, corridors and in and out of the rooms, drinking in the atmosphere and faded glamour, surrounded by ghosts, gossip and fading echoes of the Hollywood dream.

Here Lies Man – s/t

I’m pretty sure that it was Face-of-90s-Golf, Nick Faldo, who first uttered the immortal line ‘It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing’ (He really had a face for Golf-in-the-90s… God himself must’ve been imagining him prowling the Fairways like a 9 Iron toting lion, when he crafted that face out of his own ManFatTM) and the debut album by Here Lies Man is a strong candidate for the defence of that little aphorism. In this case, the swing is brought by African Clave beats trampling all over some Sabbath style riffage. This kind of explicit fusion can sometimes sound very cut n paste, sometimes at the expense of the magic of the original sources as they’re bent out of shape and squeezed into a mould they were never meant to fit into. HLM avoid that pitfall by allowing the Afrobeats to reign. Structurally, there’s very little by way of verse-chorus arrangement here. Instead the rhythms push the songs between percussive breaks and tone heavy, syncopated, Low Fi riffs with the vocals largely chanted, repeated phrases (honestly, if you read the tracklisting then you’ve got about 80% of the lyrics; “letting go of the human race, sailing to, into outer space” is the closest they get to Leonard Cohen). As a result, the 8 tracks all have a thematic unity but one that offers enough room for variation to keep the album from descending out of the groove and into a furrow.  It’s the use of keys and electronics that bring out beads of sweat though. They’re the last thing you notice, often washes of synth, tingling harmonic flourishes and bubbling organ stabs, but they glue the tracks together and provide borderline subliminal hooks and moments of revelation on repeated listens.

British Sea Power - Let The Dancers Inherit The Party

I couldn’t begin to claim to have listened to even a remotely measurable proportion of the music released over the last twelve months, so this is most likely bollocks, but concision did seem to be a recurring theme of many of the new releases I got round to listening to last year (The relative brevity of Endless Boogie’s Vibe Killer almost resulted in the band changing their name to School-Run Boogie, Kamasi Washington went from 2015’s triple album The Epic to half hour mini album Truth, Destroyer released an album simply titled Ken wherein 7 of 12 tracks came in at under 4 minutes… I could go on, but am a man of my time and my brutally diminished attention span won’t stand for it). I’m going to venture that perhaps a collective, subconscious realisation dawned in 2017 that we really don’t have time to fuck about with exploratory musings via the medium of theremin solos. Attention to detail, actually listening (let alone repeated listening) have not been hallmarks of this age. Maybe some actual tunes needed banging out, just to be sure that a flicker of humanity pulsed its way out into the universe, before one of the myriad nutters we’ve given distracted, denial ridden bunk ups to, finally locates the big red button that his staff have been desperately trying to distract him from. BSP certainly gave a lot of bang for buck on Let The Dancers Inherit The Party. Hooks were veritably ladeled in, exploratory urges were reigned in and yet none of the idiosyncratic and eccentric ticks and whistles that make BSP so special got lost. See Keep on Trying (Sechs Freunde), which, apart from opening with the fantastic couplet “If you must act like a beast of the field, oh what does it yield?”, has Yan Wilkinson yelping the ‘Sechs Freunde!!’ part of the title in a manner worthy of double exclamation marks and moist with euphemistic glee (he basically makes Sechs sound like sex… cad). See also International Space Station; a paeon to the titular escapee from our there-but-for-a-hair-trigger planet. Also. Fans of classic British Understatement… Tired of saying “This. Is. Typical” through gritted teeth? Try Saint Jerome’s opening gambit ‘Oh it’s strange the way that things work out, running out of matches and the fire keeps going out’, it’s wordier, but provides up to 64% of disappointing scenarios with a soupcon of tragic poetry/poetic tragedy. Delicious.

White Hills – Stop Mute Defeat

Another band positively not fucking about these days are White Hills. The ecstatic guitar pyrotechnics and eye on the horizon kosmiche workouts of the past may have been largely purged for the time being, and yet, in spirit, the album from their back catalogue that this most reminds me of is the one where they gave fullest vent to the afore mentioned inner/outer space explorations; their Dystopian Sci Fi epic H-p1. Thematically, H-p1 confronted greed and our societal dissonance, on Stop Mute Defeat Ego Sensation and Dave W sound a call to arms for those left standing as we reach what must surely (hopefully?!) be a nadir. Musically it comes over like H-p1 triple distilled and reduced down to base elements. That album was a largely instrumental workout. In 2017, a skeletal, industrial vibe pervades and although the tracks are shorter and punchier the vocals to music ratio probably isn’t that different, infrequent vocals punctuate the tracks like slogans racing across LED billboards. If H-p1 was their Abstract Expressionist masterpiece then Stop Mute Defeat is the Brutalist monument. Sounds depressing? Not really, the title track is something of a techno banger.

Pontiak - Dialectic of Ignorance

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking ‘I want to listen to something that sounds monomaniacally baked’, then Pontiak’s latest is probably the go to. You could be thinking ‘baked’ as in the bifter soused sense of the word or baked as in dry, it doesn’t matter, it covers both those bases… offering up tunes akin to visions brought on by a combination of dehydration and lens flare at sunset after a day chasing heat haze with your head in an oven and only Mary Berry for company. The sounds and performances are chitin hard, like a particularly determined scarab marching against the sun, through the sand, while listening to Pink Floyd’s ‘Welcome to the Machine’ on repeat. Returning to the baked metaphor, it’s certainly not an overcooked album, there’s space everywhere and I doff my cap to this sense of restraint, the drums often consist of little more than the simplest patterns over which guitar, bass and synth lines take turns at wringing the life out of subtly unpredictable riffs.

Electric Wizard - Wizard Bloody Wizard

Of all the Lovecraft-ian feats that Electric Wizard have managed to pull off over the course of their long and subtly varied existence, perhaps the most satisfying, for me, has been their ability to sound like an inhuman approximation of Doom; The band themselves (Eldritch/Antipodean) imposters masquerading as humans in the vein of characters from The Shadow Over Innsmouth or The Strange Case of Charles Dexter Ward (if you want to go lower brow, imagine the Alien Cockroach in Men In Black who crams himself into the skin of that farmer, fronting a band). It’s an impression I get most strongly when listening to ‘Black Masses’ and ‘Let Us Prey’, but it could be applied to much of their output; their mixes in particular don’t conform to doom metal’s bludgeoning but crisp, stentorian but actually kind of conservative standards. The Wizeeeeerd consistently left instruments unsettlingly out of focus, FX broiling in a mire of fug so dense that your brain and outstretched devil horn salute gave up trying to settle into a comfortable 1-2 and just submitted to the Cosmic Horror.  With Wizard Bloody Wizard though, they’ve stripped away the elemental hideousness that have up till now left them unseeable, like the Horror bestriding Dunwich, left mics and amps together unchaperoned to let nature take its course and gone to town with the bass runs and some bouncing, rolling tempos… and it suits them… really suits them. They sound energised and souped up. At times (Necromania) they come across like Uncle Acid’s actual Uncle - he’s thicker set, looks at you with sunken, you weren’t there man eyes and definitely ran with a Bike gang who may or may not have (definitely did) perform satanic rites – and the results are actually (whisper it) catchy. But then I’ve thought that there was a great pop writer lurking in Jus Osborn ever since I spent more months than I care to remember humming Vinum Sabbathi to the point of Randolph Carter like distraction. Overall, this is the most human that E Wiz have ever sounded – there’s overt blues underpinning See You In Hell, a veritable romp in the form of the Witchfinder-General-covering-Hendrix’s-Manic-Depression stylings of When The Siren’s Scream and there’s an actual laugh at the end of The Reaper. Admittedly, the track’s called The Reaper and it’s a laugh that’s more Christopher Lee than Jimmy Carr, but it’s definitely a bona fide Human laugh.

Uncle Acid and The Deadbeats – Vol. 1

First things first. This album is more or less proto everything. It’s the borderline unreleased debut by a proto Uncle Acid and the Deadbeats, actually dating from 2010 but only officially released in 2017. Secondly, It’s a proto-metal feast, a mud wrestling Blue Oyster Cult before the Pearlman got put before Swine, Masters of Reality style chuggers morphing into King of The Rumbling Spires rumpuses, a whiff of the Kinks at their speaker slashing-est, Crazy Horse getting stuck in a toy box with Alice Cooper, eyeing each other suspiciously but deciding to make a go of it for the sake of John’s Children. Thirdly, it sounds like a prototype of an audio recording to be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised if it turned out that the drums were recorded using a pencil mike plugged straight into a cassette recorder. However, you couldn’t expect/wouldn’t really want it any other way. Uncle Acid is founded on tape worn thin and the impossibly red blood of no budget Amicus productions. Perhaps the moment that best sums up Uncle Acid’s determination to prevent considerations of taste, decency or proficient sound engineering from pissing on the bonfire of escapism is the fact that during Witches Garden they use a gong (3:24 in the link to be precise). A fucking GONG. The instrument drummers plump for when success has become inversely proportional to self awareness, usually around the same time they start thinking that going swimming with a limo is a reasonable way to fill days off. This album first emerged as a run of 30 CD-Rs. And they/he put a gong on it. And the gong sounds like it was recorded about 4 miles away. But it’s a fucking GONG. Inspired.

[meme-helga-blog]

101 Ways to Successfully be Annoying

1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sensual massage.'

3. Specify that your drive-through order is 'to go.'

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of 'Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip...'

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.

7. Speak only in a 'robot' voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will 'swipe your grub.'

10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

12. Sniffle incessantly.

13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

14. Name your dog 'Dog.'

15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions 'to keep them tuned up.'

16. Reply to everything someone says with 'that's what YOU think.'

17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your 'astronaut training.'

18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for 'violating your airspace.'

19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a 'real hoot.'

20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

21. Practice making fax and modem noises.

22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and 'cc:' them to your boss.

23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a 'spider person.'

26. Finish all your sentences with the words 'in accordance with prophecy.'

27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.

28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

30. Disassemble your pen and 'accidentally' flip the ink cartridge across the room.

31. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.

32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you 'like it that way.'

34. Drum on every available surface.

35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.

36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.

38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

41. Set alarms for random times.

42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.

44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a 'croaking' noise.

45. Honk and wave to strangers.

46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

48. Tape pieces of 'Sweating to the Oldies' over climactic parts of rental movies.

49. Wear your pants backwards.

50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

51. Begin all your sentences with 'ooh la la!'

52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

53. only type in lowercase.

54. dont use any punctuation either 55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

59. Write 'X - BURIED TREASURE' in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J. Simpson conspiracy theories.

61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: 'Do you hear that?' 'What?' 'Never mind, it's gone now.'

62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

65. Demand that everyone address you as 'Conquistador.'

66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

67. When Christmas caroling, sing 'Jingle Bells, Batman smells' until physically restrained.

68. Wear a cape that says 'Magnificent One.'

69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce 'no, wait, I messed it up,' and repeat.

73. Drive half a block.

74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

75. Ask people what gender they are.

76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.

78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off 'in case the big one comes.'

79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as 'Feliz Navidad,' the Archies' 'Sugar' or the Mr.Rogers theme song.

80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

83. Change your name to 'John Aaaaasmith' for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each 'a.'

84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

86. Wear a LOT of cologne.

87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your 'superior mental processing.'

88. Sing along at the opera.

89. Mow your lawn with scissors.

90. At a golf tournament, chant 'swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!' 91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your 'imaginary friend.'

92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about 'psychological profiles.'

94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a 'magic picture.'

95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

96. Never make eye contact.

97. Never break eye contact.

98. Construct elaborate 'crop circles' in your front lawn.

99. Construct your own pretend 'tricorder,' and 'scan' people with it, announcing the results.

100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

[itunesbooks]

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[dylan-hague]

Chapter 14

November 21st, 2017. 5:47 PM.

"Welcome to Gotham City, Miss Roth."

Damian smiled as he watched Raven step off the plane to the rain-covered concrete below. This was her first time in Gotham, and it was comforting for Damian to know that her first experience in the city would be in the best care possible; Gotham was was a dangerous place, but they were in the care of Bruce Wayne. They couldn't possibly be more safe.

Awaiting them at the bottom of the steps, umbrella in hand, was Alfred, a sight for sore eyes if there ever was one. He smiled up at the girl, his eyes tired, but full of life. This time of year was special to him; he'd grown to love all of the members of Bruce's little family just as much as Bruce had. They were like his grandchildren, and it was truly a blessing to see them all together, especially when it didn't involve some dire threat to the city.

"Th... thank you, sir." Raven stopped for a second, turning back for a moment to look back at Damian before taking the the elder gentleman's hand. As she stepped down onto the wet ground, Alfred turned to Damian, who was now making his way down the steps.

"Master Damian!" Alfred smiled up at the Titan. "It's good to see you again, sir! You look well."

"Thank you, Pennyworth," Damian smiled as he stepped down underneath the umbrella. "How are Father and Alfred?"

"I'm happy to say that the both of them are in good health, sir," the butler said he led them to a golf cart parked near the runway.

"Wait..." Raven's eyebrow rose as she hopped into the passenger seat of the cart. "I thought you were Alfred."

"Alfred is what I named my cat," Damian explained. "Here, let me drive."

"I'm afraid not, sir." Alfred folded in his umbrella as he sat down behind the wheel. "Master Bruce gave me specific instructions not to allow you to drive for the duration of this trip."

"What? But I know how to drive, what's the deal?"

"Apologies, sir..." Alfred grinned slyly at Damian. "But your father was quite adamant. He said that you are, and I quote, 'a madman behind the wheel'."

Damian chuckled as he flopped across the back seat of the cart. "I steal the Batmobile ONE time..." Raven looked back at him bewildered as Alfred laughed, driving off towards their car...

After avoiding the lecherous members of Gotham's press as best they could, the three of them arrived at Wayne Manor. As Alfred opened the door for the two Titans, Raven looked up at the old mansion curiously.

"Welcome to Wayne Manor, Miss Roth." Alfred gestured toward the front door, beckoning for the two to head inside.

"Thank you, sir. It's a beautiful building," Raven replied as they made their way up the steps. "How long as it been here?"

"This manor has been in the Wayne family since the early 1800s," Alfred began to explain, reaching for the door. "In fact, the tunnels underneath were once used to conceal runaway slaves in the Undergro--"

Before he could open the door, it burst open from inside, nearly knocking Damian back down the stairs. As the boy sat back up and shook the dirt from his hair, he looked up to see a red-haired, bespectacled girl standing in the doorway. Judging by her stature, she looked to be about Damian's age.

"Oh, jeez! Sorry, dude," the girl ran to Damian and helped him to stand back up. "Didn't see ya there! You alright?"

"Um... yes?" Damian replied, bewilderment displayed on his face. "Who exactly... are you?"

"That," a voice replied from just inside the house, "is Carrie. Carrie Kelley." All four of them turned to see Bruce Wayne standing in the foyer, his arms crossed as he looked down at his boy.

"Hey, boss! Sorry about your guest..." Carrie stopped for a moment as she looked back and forth between Damian and Bruce. "Wait... is he one of..."

Bruce nodded. "He was the fifth. Just before you."

Carrie grinned. "Coo'," she said, walking back inside. Damian paused for a moment as the realization came to him.

"You already had me replaced?" He looked at his father in surprise.

Bruce nodded. "Carrie comes from a rough home. Her parents are both drug addicts, not providing the environment she needs to grow."

Alfred smiled with pride. "She's every bit as energetic as Master Richard was at that age."

"Wait, so you just..." Raven stuttered for a moment, blinking rapidly as she took in this information. "... you just swooped in and pulled this girl out of her terrible home life?"

Damian shrugged. "He tends to do that. It's kind of his thing."

"We'll have plenty of time to discuss the misfortune of all of your siblings, Master Damian, once they've all arrived. For now, let us get out of this rain. Come now, Miss Roth, let me show you to your room." Raven followed the butler into the manor as Damian walked with his father into the study.

"So this new Robin..." Damian began as he scanned the shelves. "How long have you had her?"

"I found her early September, started training her right away," Bruce replied as he approached the old grandfather clock against the wall. "I haven't let her come on patrol with me yet, not until she's ready."

"Does she take to it?" The younger Wayne turned to face his father as the clock moved out off the wall, revealing a passageway behind it into the Batcave. "She seems like she has the energy for it, especially considering how old she is..."

Bruce grinned. "Like a fish to water," he said, beckoning for his son to descend first. "In fact, when I told her the last Robin would be here, she insisted on sparring with you."

Damian smirked as he walked down the stairway. "How does she like the uniform?"

"Oh, she... has opinions on it," Bruce sighed as he followed behind his boy into the Cave. "Opinions that I don't necessarily agree with, but..."

As they entered the cave, Damian was surprised to see Carrie standing in the training ring, wearing her uniform... or, at least, part of it. She had no cape, her mask was replaced with what looked like some kind of goggles, and her legs were completely bare.

"Hey, you! Five!" Carrie called out, addressing Damian as she spun her staff in her hand. "Wanna go a few rounds?"

Damian looked the girl up and down, and almost had to stifle a laugh. "Maybe once you actually get dressed, sure," the Titan quipped, cocking an eyebrow. "That can't possibly be your whole uniform."

"Okay, one: I don't wear the cape when I'm training." The new Robin stood leaning on her staff, one arm wrapped around it and the other on her hip. "And two: you're just jealous my legs are awesome."

"It isn't about how you look, Carrie." Damian pulled his shirt off, revealing his Red X uniform underneath. "It's about how protecting your body. It won't matter what your legs like if someone gets lucky and shoots them full of holes."

"That's exactly what the big guy said!" Carrie grinned as she shifted into stance.

"Well, that makes sense," Damian said before flipping into the ring, his pants flying off, leaving him in the top and leggings of his uniform as he landed in a stance of his own. "After all, he IS half of my DNA."

"This'll be good..." Bruce said under his breath as Raven and Alfred walked into the cave. "Grab some popcorn, you two."

Carrie launched off her staff, flying at Damian feet-first through the air. The Titan shifted out of the way of her body, but threw his arm up to block the staff coming behind him. The instant her feet touched the ground, the girl shot forward, swinging her staff low, knocking Damian off his feet. Damian caught himself on his hands, throwing himself in a circle on the ground and sweeping Carrie's feet out from under her.

"Beast Boy taught him that one," Raven whispered to Alfred. He nodded in acknowledgment.

Carrie threw herself into the air with her arms as Damian rolled away, pulling himself to his feet. Carrie leapt at him again, stealing the offensive back as soon as Adam had taken. Damian ducked just as her leg tore through the air where his head had just been. Damian felt the wing behind her kick, and threw his arms up in front of him just in time to block her other leg. But when it connected, the sheer force behind it was more than Damian had expected, and she tossed him into the air. Just as Damian realized he was airborne, Carrie leapt up after him, locking her legs around his head and driving it into the floor.

"Catwoman taught her that one," Alfred whispered to Raven. She remained motionless, save for a twitch in her fingers.

"You give, Five!?" Carrie taunted, squeezing Damian's neck between her legs. "Tap out if ya give!"

Raven's brow began to furrow.

Damian gripped at the new Robin's legs and pulled. Good lord, it was like trying to pry open a vice! "Robins don't give..." he growled, deciding on a different tactic.

Raven's hands clenched into fists.

Damian slid further up, pushing himself to his feet with Carrie sitting on his shoulders, her legs still locked around his neck. He threw himself forward, hoping to catch her off-guard, but Carrie caught them both with her hands before her head could crash to the ground.

Raven's eyes widened.

"Whoa, now!" Carrie shouted, flipping the two of them over and grabbing Damian's hair as he clawed at her legs for breath. "You're gonna hafta try harder than that, cowbo--"

The two of them were suddenly lifted into the air, pulled apart by a dark energy. Damian looked down to see Raven with her hands raised, her eyes glowing with a deep purple light.

"Let's get something straight, 'Robin'..." Raven growled. "His name is Damian. And he's mine."

"Oh, dear..." Alfred muttered under his breath.

"Raven, please put my kids down." Bruce's voice was low, as to avoid aggravating the girl any further. After a moment of glaring up at Carrie, Raven gently set them both down, walked into the ring, and put wrapped her arms around Damian's neck.

"Wow..." Carrie sat on the ring floor blinking for a moment. "... I'm sorry, I wasn't tryin' to..."

"Daaaaaaang, kid!" Everyone turned to see Dick Grayson drop into the ring. "Who would have ever thought you'd be the jealous type?"

"Oh! Hey, One." Carrie held her hand up, and Dick pulled her back onto her feet.

"Good to see ya again, Six," Dick replied, before turning to Raven and Damian. "Listen, Raven, Carrie didn't mean any harm..."

"I know," Raven said, looking back at the new Robin, one arm still around Damian. "I'm sorry for snapping like that. I just..."

"Hey, I get it!" Carrie threw her hands up with a grin. "You don't like people messin' with your guy. That's fine."

"Gotta admit, though," Dick said as he turned back to Carrie, "I actually expected Damian to pull the win out. That was impressive how you pulled that out!"

"I told ya already..." Carrie stood proudly, hands on her hips. "Awesome legs."

"You should wear something to protect them," Raven said. "If they're your best weapon, you have to take better care of them."

"Thank you, Raven!" Bruce shouted as he walked back up the stairs into the house.

Damian groaned. It was going to be a very long week...