#the gendered cherries speak

[redladydeath]

...You wanna see something silly?

[ablizmal]

Holiday headcanon? I assume L doesn't celebrate often esp cuz of when he was a kid, I'm not sure if Juliette did when she was. Now is a good time as any to explore :D

;-;

you know how to make me cry, krill /lighthearted

I MADE A WHOLE FANFIC (mentally 😔😔😞) about L and juliette spending christmas together, since the taskforce members are at home for the holidays and the case is slow right now anyways.

they do lots of christmas adjacent things. they bake cookies, decorate em (L eats all of them ahdkwjdksjsja), adjust ornaments on the christmas tree, listen to mars argo’s “pls don’t forget me” several times throughout the day (it’s like rickrolling from L’s perspective, since juliette starts playing it at random that day jsksjkdjsjdjaks)

after spending the whole day together doing a miriad of holly jolly activities (ex. going to a christmas light exhibit), L just. casually mentions to juliette that christmas is seen as a romantic holiday in japan (where they currently are .//_//.)

…

YEAH, she doesn’t recover from that fjdkfjskjdjsja /positive

oh WAIT, this was supposed to be a juliette headcanon, that was more of an L/L holiday headcanon 😅

OKAY, juliette holiday headcanon—

she wants to make holidays as special as possible. if they can spend it with the people she loves and who love her, then they’d use that time purposefully. probably goes a bit too hard with holidays if given the opportunity tbh ahaha ( ; ^∀^)

[lunadeguda]

More brainstorming in regards to the world my OC's live in. In regards to Ray's hair color I'd imagine they did that after he moved out of zir parent's house. Before it was the same white in her muzzle.

I figure he got some recommendations from a couple sparklefurs in regards to some semi-permanent hair dye that's got magic in it.

Essentially you can apply it and it stays vibrant, but if you need to get rid of the color there's a special shampoo you can use to get rid of it in one go.

Comes in handy when family comes to visit.

[covenists]

✦ IT GIVES YOU WINGS OR LOVE?, M. VERSTAPPEN

sometimes, the team that brought you in, could also gives you more opportunity to even meet your lover there.

taglist: @queenofmanydreams @muglermami @4limq @avengers-assemble123456 @cabbyhabs @meowtastick @4mula-1 @miarabanana @amel1ee @dinosushilun1 @auggieblogs @namgification @charli123456789 @cherry-piee

yourusername

liked by redbull and 237,144 others

yourusername Woohoo !!! SO hyped to grab 🥈 at my first slopestyle World Cup since the 2022 Olympics. Genuinely had so much fun out there today. Congrats to everyone for the insane level of riding, and thank you, as always, to the supporters for all the love ❤️ A few areas need a bit of work still, but none more than my champagne skills 🥴

view all 1,247 comments

redbull Super proud of you, Y/n! 😍

username there's something about redbull athletes and winning and i can't really put my finger on it...

maxverstappen1 Proud ❤️

username What is this motherly comments, Max

username MAX LATE COMMENTING????

username Rb downfall is real y'all

username rb downfall is started from max late commenting?

username That's a sign too

username I'm planning our wedding as we speak

redbullsnow It was magnificent

landonorris ahem, probably i can teach you my *signature* champagne pop

yourusername Hmm, but I don't want to destroy anybody's trophy though

username 💀💀💀💀

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username until now i'm still questioning on how did he pulled this baddie

username I really need to see her with another Red Bull athletes out there

username her bf is literally max verstappen

username wait fr?

username She literally confess it in GMA, how's that fake?

username PR relationship is real yk...

username RENEW YOUR CONTRACT, MOTHER

username istg she looks like lily's lost twin

username At least she's not dutch, I'm with her

username why? what's wrong with being dutch?

username I'M TIRED OF HEARING THEIR NATIONAL ANTHEM OKAY LEAVE ME ALONE

username naw brother, prepared to hear them national anthem at the same time

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1 and 188,316 others

yourusername Celebratory lunch + A lil hair touchup 😆

view all 1,589 comments

username Ahem... No pic cred?

username I think you forgot to dry your hair

yourusername My stomach's grumbling so loud already, I can't hold it anymore to even dry my hair 😂

username UGH SHE'S SO PRETTYYY 😍😍

username PLS SAY YOU WILL RENEW YOUR CONTRACT

maxverstappen1 Don't forget to spare me some 🍴🍴

yourusername How cliché of you to comment this while eating my sushi 🤨

username HER SUSHI ���😭

username Max late commenter is back but not with his motherly comments, but with a LIE who is now debunked by his own girlfriend

maxverstappen1 I thought she wouldn't reply to this

username better not to lie to a skier

username All of these were very much so obvious. You guys don't have to act like doing a soft launch when she already dropped a literal bomb to confess that she's dating Max in GMA

username heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes

username I want to be her gf 😭😭😭

username You're unreal OMG

maxverstappen1

liked by carlossainz55 and 472,580 others

maxverstappen1 Flexing master #TiffanyPartner #TiffanyHardwear

view all 1,096 comments

yourusername I agreed to post here but what was the caption supposed to mean?

username It's giving Lily + Albon's dynamic

username Max influencer era is here and ready

username I want that hand to choke me

yourusername Whoa

username Istg she looks like a carbon copy of ＠lilymhe period.

username omg max is stealing her endorsement????

landonorris okay. the trial's over, let's make your own jpg account.

maxverstappen1 Wait, really?

landonorris no, just baiting.

username WHY IS HE SO ANNOYING 😭😭😭😭

username supportive bf max is my new favorite gender

username Who taught him to be like this?

alex_albon He's definitely has attended Alex Albon school of boyfriendery

username how come did her hair never looked the same in every frame she's in?

username but the hair color remain consistent till the end of the day

maxverstappen1 Drafts do exist, you know.

username OO ENDED THEM

username pls do a tutorial on how to make your fingers as long as hers

username I bet that is not Max's hand

username Break the bet, it is not

redbullracing · 24m

yourusername

liked by victoriaverstappen and 102,445 others

yourusername Truly enjoying my paddock debut here. Thank you ＠redbullracing for the invitation, definitely having much fun in Shanghai 🥰

view all 973 comments

username Me and the bad bitch I pulled after being WDC:

username LILY GO BACK TO ALEX'S GARAGE

username Rb couple domination is real

username Max: 🧍

username you guys better believe when they said red bull enjoyer belong, they were.

lilymhe Why are you guys looks so stiff? 💀

yourusername Wait until I asked him to go skiing. Let's see how stiff he would be.

maxverstappen1 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

username Can't wait to see Max skiing with her. Wonder if his skiing skill has improved ever since he's with her.

username next stop: the alps

username Oh it's her paddock debut? I thought I have seen her attending gp in Ausgp?

username That time she wasn't his gf just yet

alexandrasaintmleux Ahhh your fit is so cutee <3

yourusername YOURS TOOOOO 🌹🥺

username QUEEN IS BACK IN TOWN, SLAYING AS USUAL

username Whys your paddock pass looks different from the rest of the WAGS?

yourusername I was invited by ＠redbullracing as a guest. So that's why mine's different 💁🏼‍♀️

username Why would they invite you as a guest when you're already his gf tho😂

username Can you stop asking?

maxverstappen1

liked by yourusername and 463,197 others

maxverstappen1 Alps: Day 1 ⛷️

view all 1,638 comments

username Wait why is it different?

maxverstappen1 Sometimes, one of us played it harshly and losing the original glasses. So we bought it new.

username AND IT ISN'T YOU??!?? OMG

username Awwww if my relationship not this sweet, I don't want it.

username Y/N WITHOUT HER RB STICKER HELMET AND ATTRIBUTES??? WOWOWOW

username mother and father🥴🥴🥴

username They're cute asf

carlossainz55 What a good day for a ski couples

username probably i should drink red bull to have someone like them

danielricciardo Who wins?

yourusername We're both... Losing, actually

danielricciardo I KNEW IT

yourusername

liked by schecoperez and 157,839 others

yourusername Turns out, he's not that bad of a skier too.

view all 2,630 comments

maxverstappen1 Hey, I don't look like that

maxverstappen1 How could you do this after I posted out sweet moments yesterday

maxverstappen1 What is this betrayal

username Alright Granny, let's get you to bed

username WHO'S THAT ON THE SECOND SLIDEEEEEE

charles_leclerc What was that outfits 😂😂

yourusername Don't say as if your fits were not like that

charles_leclerc Mine's fashionable, sorry.

lilymhe Fashionable just for leo's eyes

username i love how contrast their posts are. ah soulmate

username I want what they're having toooooo

username His digital footprints is something that I have to go for a dig

username Well apparently the both of them were losing

username says who?

username Daniel and Y/n on Max's post

username I know they were never gonna be the best at competing at each other

username if their relationship was really a pr, i don't believe it

[akunya]

"somewhere only we know.”

pairings: dragon!sylus x m!reader

summary: thinking out loud, you begin to wonder how things would be under different circumstances.

tw: slight angst, sfw, fluff, MYTHIC SPOILERS.

notes: truthfully, the gender here isn't specified. however all of my fics are written with a male!reader in mind. do with that as you wish.

"Do you think, in another life.. We would still be together?"

Your voice cracked as you watched the petals whisk away. The soft grass swayed with the wind, a gentle comfort as you clutched it in your palm. The clouds swirled as you both sat in silence, staring at the sky in a comfortable quiet.

It was just the two of you together, in your secret little place that Sylus had brought you to that day. You found yourself asking to be flown back there often. There was something so calming about this side of Tarus, so serene, it nearly felt unreal every time you two sat here.

Sylus was the first to break the tension as he looked down at you with an amused smile. "Together?" His tone was teasing, but not enough to ruin the atmosphere the pair of you made for each other. The dragon was about to make another teasing remark until he caught a glimpse of your clenched fist.

"You know what I mean."

The slight tremble in your words struck his heart with guilt. He wished, for once, he didn't try to poke at you so often.

There was another long portion of silence between you two. Taking a flower into your palm, you fiddled with its petals, the delicate red smooth under your fingertips. Worried you made things awkward, you dug your feet into the ground to pick yourself up - almost, that is, until the man next to you began to speak.

Barely above a whisper, your eyes met for the first time that evening, looking at him with an emotion you couldn't quite describe. "I think so," Was it uncertainty? Fear? Relief? You didn't know what you expected from his answer, nor did you expect one in the first place. You felt as though he was staring into your soul, his red pupils shining in the warm tones of the sunset. A part of you wondered if bringing it up at all was foolish.

"..Yeah. We would be."

Blinking, you let out a heavy sigh you didn't know you were holding. A small chuckle left your lips. "I wonder what it would be like. Would we look the same?" You wondered aloud. It would be amusing if you were the taller one in the relationship in your next life, however, a part of you knew that was never going to happen. Your gaze went back to the sun as it set behind the mountains of Tarus city, the hues creating a cascade of orange and yellow across the sky.

"What does it matter? I wouldn't mind. Unless, you prefer if this fiend always has horns." Sylus nudged your side playfully, your laugh making butterflies swarm in his stomach. Sylus with his draconic features were like the cherry on top. Once scared, you grew to adore the rough scales of him the most, finding yourself caressing the smooth surface with your thumb on nights alone with him more than once. "The horns are a nice touch. I would miss them a bit." Looking back at him, you inched a bit closer, testing your luck to see if he would retract from your closeness.

He would not. He never did, not from you.

Taking his silence as a cue to continue, you started up your thoughts again. "We could have our own home together. It doesn't have to be big." You imagined a quaint little cottage in the middle of the forest. Small, but big enough for the both of you, adorned with treasures and trinkets from your past adventures. It was remote, but that's how you would want it: away from everyone else. Just you and Sylus in your own trove, shielded from the harsh outside world. After all that you have been through, you didn't really yearn for something lavish and grand.

"A small home isn't bad." Sylus found himself imagining too as he listened intently to your thoughts. He rarely let his mind wander and think about such trivial things, but this once he could make an exception. Thinking of a divergent future than what he was destined for always seemed futile. In the end, there was nothing he could do to break the curse he was born into. He was a monster, destined for his death by your hand, even if you didn't know it yet. And that was how the world saw him.

But, if it was for you, he could entertain your fantasy a bit.

"Is there something you want, Sylus? If we could be somewhere different."

You looked up at him again for answers. His throat tightened, looking down at how hopeful you were. So innocent, so pure.

For a moment, he had forgotten all of the crimes you had committed. Your hair flickered with the wind as the sunlight framed every part of your face beautifully. The outfit that matched his ever-so-cliche has never looked so right before. If he had no idea who you were, he would have thought you were an angel descended from the heavens, a blessing to bring some ease to his wretched timeline.

Maybe you weren't his arch-nemesis. Perhaps, his destiny wasn't as harsh as he thought it was growing up.

Maybe death wasn't so bad, if it were by your hands.

"So long as you're with me, I don't care about anything else." The dragon's words were taut. Fiddling with a flower in his claws, he twirled the stem mindlessly, letting it float away with the wind that brushed against you both of you.

Leaning against his shoulder, you didn't bother fighting them when your eyelids started to feel heavy. You didn't need to question or ask anymore. He was right, in the end. Sylus didn't care for moving either, watching the sun slowly set and cast the city in darkness once again.

If you two were together, that would be enough.

[coralinnii]

When they accidentally kabe-don you feat: Epel, Jamil, Jack, Deuce genre: fluff, budding romance notes: reader is written as Yuu, not gender specific, no pronouns used,

when he’s hiding from Vil

Epel just needs a break now and again. The skincare routine, intonation and vocabulary training, posture correction, calories check…everything is little too much for today. 

He honestly just wanted a rest in the courtyard before Vil figured out he’s skipping out on his lessons. Which is how you found the lavender-haired freshman laying behind the bushes. 

“So, how long are you planning on hiding?” You asked him with a cheeky grin Epel doesn’t appreciate

“When I’m good and ready” or caught. Epel whispered those last words under his breath as he guessed that Vil had already noticed his absence and was looking for him or had ordered Rook to bring him back. 

“Monsieur Cherry Apple~” Speak of the devil

Epel cursed as he heard the hunter’s call and in hurried desperation, pulled you down with him as he rolled into the bushes. He didn’t realized how he pinned you down as he peered out through the gaps of the leaves trying to see if Pomefiore’s vice housewarden was out of sight. 

He only realized his position when he heard a shaky tone whisper his name. 

He looked down to see you looking at him, surprised and flustered. He felt a rush of adrenaline as he assessed his situation. His arms and legs caged you underneath him, and the low height of the bushes forced him on his elbows and knees to avoid peaking out from the foliage, so your bodies were so close that he swore he could feel your heartbeat (which he noticed were quite fast) on his own. 

He’s been trying for so long to make the first move on you but now that he had you so close to him, he’s blanking on his next move. He’s wondering what would Leona do in this situation? Heck, what would Vil do? 

Epel was so nervous that he didn’t notice your own mental battle as you decided what you should do. You were fidgeting with your hands whether you should push Epel away or if you should pull him by his cute little bowtie. Finally you decided to shoot your shot, reaching out to touch the lapels of Epel’s school jacket, gently pulling the flustered freshman towards you. 

Taking the hint, Epel started to lower himself as he watched your expression for any last minute second thoughts or discomfort. You showed none. 

Too bad that’s as far as he got as reality smacked him in the face with a burst of light shining through a sudden gap of the leaves being pushed away. 

“Beaute! A beautiful embrace between two young lovers, intertwined like vines of the foliage that hides their rendezvous from the eyes of their peers.” 

Rook’s sudden intrusion forced the two of you back to your senses as you and Epel scrambled out from each other’s arms, looking away in embarrassment. 

Perhaps because Rook senses the awkwardness, Rook reached for Epel and pulled him to walk with him towards the Mirror Chambers to head back to the Pomefiore dorm. 

“I sincerely apologize, young freshman. But, our esteemed Housewarden is awaiting our presence as to begin your daily lessons” 

Epel didn’t grumble or sigh under his breath at that like he usually would. Instead, his thoughts were swirling around the last few minutes with you. He’s stunned and honestly a little giddy over the positive step in his relationship. You reached for him, right? That means you, his crush, want something more with him, right? 

Epel braved a glimpse behind him and noticed you fanning yourself to cool your warm face. He felt his ego swelled at the notion that he made you that way. 

He promised to himself that he’ll be the one to make the first move next time. 

when he saved you during Basketball Club 

Basketball was one of the few aspects of Jami's life that doesn’t revolve around Kalim or his duties as the servant of the Asim family so he assumed that he could have some time away from his responsibilities. Too bad that’s not the case when Floyd, the wishy-washy eel merman and Ace, the scheming slacker are his clubmates. Whenever one or both of them are here, there’s always a possibility of something that is bound to give Jamil a headache. 

Today was a little different however, when Ace decided to invite you to watch the club activities. Regardless how quiet or chaotic you are, Jamil would much rather deal with you than the worrisome Floyd and no, it is not because he finds you charming or attractive in any way. He swears it’s not that…not at all. 

You sat on the side benches, watching and sometimes giving encouraging hollers to your friends, including him which certainly boosts the morale of the club members. Almost unfortunately so as Floyd started getting too into his slam dunks. In his manic glee, the eel merman wanted to see if he could slam the ring hard enough to break it. 

Despite everyone’s pleas not to do so, Floyd went for it and slammed the basketball hard, succeeding in bringing the ring down along with the ball. The rest of the team ran from the hoop as the ball that was still stuck in the net of the hoop bounced towards you, bringing the ring with it. 

With quick reflexes, Jamil dove towards you to push you away from the ball’s path. The Scarabia student covered you as the both of you got on the ground, the basketball safely bouncing away from the two of you. 

Recovering from the fall, Jamil raised his head to survey the damage. It looks like the ball lost its momentum and is now rolling to a stop somewhere far from him. He sighed a breath of exhausted relief and looked down to ask if you’re alright. 

Still a bit shaky, you answered back with affirmation as you loosen the tight grip you just realized you had on Jamil as you must have wrapped your arms around his neck when he reached for you. To be fair, Jamil also just realized he had placed one of his hands behind your head, worried you might hurt yourself when diving to the floor. 

The both of you didn’t say anything else, lost in each other’s presence as you both wondered what’s the best course of action. Jamil is a tactful man but even he can be confused as to what to do. He searched you for a clue as to what you’re thinking. Were you uncomfortable? Scared? Maybe happy? 

“Floyd, this is why we said stop. Now how are we gonna play?” Ace complained to the tall Octavinelle student who responded with a frown

“I wanna see if I can, so I did it. You got a problem with that, Crabby?” Floyd said, showing off a glimpse of his sharp teeth in intimidation “We can talk it over if ya want. Come over here” 

“Nope. No thanks!” Typical Ace, running away after running his mouth but Floyd is unfortunately a chaser. 

Jamil sighed, getting to his feet then helping you onto yours. He weighed in the pros and cons of intervening before deciding to do so, in fear Floyd may break more things if left alone. Before he did, he took a quick glance at you and his keen eyes caught something rather pleasant. 

You were biting your lip.  

when he accidentally bumped into you 

Jack Howl is an honest student. He does his best in school and he makes an effort to not miss a class if he can help it. Except one day, that may not be the case. 

Jack was assisting his senior Ruggie in convincing Leona to attend one of his classes. He already missed too many classes that week and Professor Crewel was scarily serious that the lion beastman attend his class as his grades depend on this particular attendance. Worried, Jack had offered to literally carry Leona to his class which offended Savanaclaw’s Housewarden enough to walk on his own, angrily declaring that no one is going to carry him like some sack of potatoes. 

But now, Jack was almost late to his own class which explained his long steps and quick walking as running in the halls was prohibited. In his haste, he didn’t consider looking ahead as he rounded a corner which ultimately caused his collision with another student. 

Jack was young but he was still a bulky beastman. A collision with him would mostly end badly for the other party which is why with Jack’s build and strength, pushed the other student backwards onto the floor with Jack following suit. Thankfully, Jack managed to catch himself before he reached the floor, softening his landing and using his arms to avoid crushing anyone. 

“Ah, sorry-“ Jack started to apologize before he looked and realized it was you. You were also in a hurry to your class and the last thing you expected was to bump into what you initially thought to be a firm but surprisingly soft wall. 

“I’m sorry, Jack!” You apologized as well with a look of worry. “I should have looked where I was going. Are you ok?” 

But Jack didn’t respond. He was slowly working his feelings whenever he’s near you. He noticed that his tail starts to wag excitedly around you which he curses his obvious joy he feels in your presence. Thankfully you haven’t realized or you weren’t aware what his tail wagging means. 

That may change though as you spoke once more, “Umm Jack. Your tail is tickling me” 

Jack’s ears perked up and he looked behind him and to his horror, he watched his tail whip about, occasionally brushing against your legs that were under Jack’s. The soft fur was tickling your legs which made you reflexively move away but being under Jack meant you accidentally bump into the beastman’s thighs, which definitely made him flinch. 

Mortified, Jack scrambled hastily off you but still offered to pull you up which you accepted. After a quick look to see you’re ok, the white-haired student gave a quick nod before running towards the direction of his class, school rules be damned. 

You were left in the dust but you didn’t try to stop Jack. Especially since you needed to head to your class as well. With that, you turned to walk towards your destination but with a shy but satisfied smile on your lips. Turns out what Ace and Deuce told you about Jack’s tail was true after all. 

when blocking others from you 

It was not a secret that the school cafeteria was filled with delicious meals and treats for the students in NRC. Considering the rich, the powerful, and actual members of royalty were attending here, the school can’t afford to serve anything else but the best and finest lest they want to hear complaints. 

Still, that doesn’t mean there’s enough to go around. The cafeteria works on a first-come, first-serve basis where you gotta be there quick if you want what you want for lunch, especially when there’s something particularly rare on the menu. 

Which is why one day there was a scrambling line of hungry and greedy students who were on the brink of starting a fist fight for a special limited edition sandwich made by the finest and rarest of ingredients. Grim and Ace in particular were hankering for a taste of the supposedly grand sandwich so you, Grim, Ace, and Deuce were quick to get in line for the chance of such a treat. 

The crowd was getting restless. Students were pushing and yelling, agitated over so-called line cutters or people pushing each other to accelerate the pace. You could handle yourself well enough but a push too far from these relentless students could send anyone to the wall at this point. 

And luck would have it, a student was aggressively pushed back which in turn pushed you out from the line and back against a wall near the food line. You groaned over the slight pain coursing your back before seeing the back of another student coming your way. 

Before you could brace yourself, a strong arm came between you and the incoming student, effectively blocking the impact from you. You looked to see Deuce’s body protectively covering you as he placed his other hand against the wall near your head, glaring at the student who came flying towards you. 

“Watch it, buddy” Deuce said, his delinquent side peeking out as he gave the student a nasty warning stare. The student walked away, grumbling how it wasn’t like he wanted to get flung around like that and returned back to the line. 

Ignoring him, Deuce turned to look back at you with worry. “Are you ok?” His voice was nothing like the gruff tone mere seconds ago but instead a sweet voice of concern which had you more flustered than before. Not trusting your voice, you nodded your head. 

But Deuce wasn’t too convinced, he was worried that the slam might cause a bruise on where you landed. He cautiously moved his hand to the side of your head, gently touching you as he tried to feel for something, perhaps a bump or some blood. “You gotta tell me if you’re hurt, ok? A hit like that can do some serious damage” 

As sweet as Deuce was, you couldn’t pay attention to his words right now. Not when he’s caressing your head so softly like that, as though you’re a fragile baby chick in his hands. He was so oblivious to his effects on you that you curse him for his obliviousness but at the same time, you’re relieved he can’t tell how nervous he’s making you. 

“Yo Henchhuman, Deuce!” Grim’s voice called you and Deuce out from your own little world as the cat-like creature ran to you. “We got the yummy sandwich! Let’s hurry and find a seat” 

“What happened to you guys?” Ace questioned with a suspicious quirk of his brow, as he noticed the closeness of you two. 

“Some jerk pushed Prefect into the wall, and then nearly crushed the two of us,” Deuce angrily explained. “Looks like we’re good, though” 

“Well then, if nothing’s wrong then let’s find a spot to eat. I’m starving!” Grim already started walking with Deuce already following to make sure he doesn’t crash into somebody with his small body. You and Ace followed soon behind but yours and his attention were somewhere else. Ace watched you with mischievous curiosity, dying to interrogate you on the details Deuce left out in his story, and you looked anywhere but the red-haired freshman as you already knew what he’s thinking about.

[notscarsafe]

OKAY SO what with the TWO new Hermits implied by the updated banner I will say that, though the Skizz truthers have me convinced, I now have room to do my own crazy red string monologue and throw my hat in for my choice

1) Mythical J. Sausage (the J is silent) is a multitalented S-tier builder that absolutely deserves to be shoulder to shoulder with the Hermits. The man does buildings, interiors, terraforming, custom trees, and he does them SO WELL.

2) The production values!!! Beautiful replay mod sequences with shifting camera perspectives, shaders, music that sets the tone for each segment that's different from series to series. He already has more than a million followers on YouTube and for good reason!!

3) He has been SO consistent lately. He started a hardcore world about three months ago (about the time you might expect the Hermits to finalize their s10 choices maybe...???) and already has 15 episodes and hasn't gotten involved in any other big content. (He did just start playing a little of the BCG server but from what I understand that's super casual /copium copium copium).

4) That hardcore world is conveniently about to reach a good "pause" point. He started his world on a cherry blossom biome island that he's filled with a medieval village and starter farms, he's said it's almost full and what's left is the castle. I'm guessing the new season will start the first week of February, so if Sausage puts out a video this week building out that Castle and finishing that island it will be MIGHTY CONVENIENT TIMING.

5) This man can GRIND. His Hardcore world hasn't even been going half a year and he's built... So much??? Magnificent! And when he was on the Hermitcraft server he did the Razorcrest for scar AND the player head baby yoda/stormtrooper merch AND the noteblock themesong AND still built in the xmas village and other "diamond of peace" and so many other shenanigans. Did the man even sleep? He can grind with the best of them.

6) He can do redstone, too! Maybe not unique designs, I honestly don't know, but he builds farms for build materials no problem.

7) The DRAMA this man loves his improv and his backstory and trauma lore! For every series he does! Can you imagine if he gets to interact with Ren for an extended period of time, what that would do to them, to us?? Give Martyn a run for his money!!

8) Which brings me to my next point, which is that Sausage is already One of The Gang, because he's been in series with so many of the Hermits already! Empires and the crossover, obviously, but also Pirates with Cleo and Origins with Scar, and he's even done MCC! Joel is the only other player with the same depth of different series but there are other people truthing him already.

9) The EPIC BROMANCE with Pearl. My god the devotion of this man to his sunflower goddess bestie. I would try to do ot justice but y'all have seen floweroflaurelins work, you already know.

10) He's already a PG streamer but with HILARIOUSLY PG-13 tendencies. Imagine him and Cleo cracking each other up at an HHH stream, *grips your shoulders* IMAGINE IT.

11) Sausage comes with his own mascot in the form of interdimensional dog extraordinaire Bubbles, but he's also just an animal lover on general. Mans drinks his "I love Jellie" juice and had her in his world even before the sad news of her loss.

12) Diversity win! No one should be hired just for their gender, race, sexuality etc etc unless it's truly necessary to the job, but we were all happy when more women got added to the server in s8 and I know a lot of people would be happy to see some ethnic diversity added, too.

... That bulletin board had a lot more pins in it than I thought it did but anyway MYTHICALSAUSAGE TRUTHERS/ALL OTHER TRUTHERS RISE UP SPEAK YOUR TRUTH! we'll only get to wildly speculate for a few weeks so we might as well make it everyone else's problem ENJOY IT TO THE FULLEST!!

[just-myhyperfixations]

Instead of being productive let me tell you my niche and completely useless (like me ;)) aftg headcanons

Aaron is dyslexic and it pisses him off even more bc Andrew has eidetic memory

Mary made Neil pretend to be a girl at some point of their runaway life, resulting in Neil having little to no concept of gender

Nathan is from Poland (cmon we all know that last name is not American)

Katelyns (idk if the spelling is correct) family adores Aaron and thinks of him as their own

Riko and Jean hooked up, not bc they liked each other but as a power move from Riko

Jean refuses to speak Japanese after joining the trojans

Allison, Renee and Dan get manicures together every month (Neil tags along often)

Bee made a cringe motivational poster to make Andrew quit smoking, he hated it (started smoking way less)

Andrew and Renee have a knitting/crocheting club together

Jeremy uses a cherry flavoured chapstick

[missmisandrytabletalk]

Just came on here to say that Imane Khelif IS a woman. You can be gender critical and still have some common sense that the Olympics doesn't permit trans individuals to take part in this category of sports. All athletes are subjected to a few gender tests before they even apply to compete in boxing. And it's literally Algeria we're talking about here lol.

Moids accusing a woman of being a man just because she doesn't have a physique and features of a woman that aligns with their fantasized conventional standards. Though the white crocodile tears were definitely a cherry on top.

The general public loves to jump on the bandwagon without doing any research about the chances of what might that person be suffering from. There has been some claims that she suffers from DSD (Disorder/Differences of Sex Development) in which a person is born with reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t fit the typical definitions of female or male. They can have unusual chromosome patterns, atypical genitalia size or difference in the development of testes or ovaries. In her case, she has testosterone levels higher for an average woman but then again it also depends on how much responsive your body is to that particular hormone. She might be an intersex individual but certainly NOT a trans person. Even if you look at her childhood pictures, it was quite apparent that she was born a girl.

Honestly speaking, gender testing system itself shouldn't be really relied upon. Human anatomy is complex and I reckon a simple blood sample doesn't really give us the bigger picture. This situation is a clear embodiment of it, and the Olympics team & IBA is to be solely blamed for this controversy. Anyway, congratulations to her for this glorious feat!

[a-polite-melody]

God, since the whole “bear vs man” thing came up again

Everything I’ve seen said in defence of using this as a framework to mean something has always relied on a cherry picking of stats and broad application of those to serve bio- and/or gender-essentialism.

The question is meant to be a direct reference to the fact that there were women hikers on TikTok actively stating that in their experience they end up more afraid coming across a man than a bear because if the bear were to attack at least people would believe that.

Great—same if a woman attacked you in the woods. You’d probably actually be believed more if your story is assault by a man than assault by a woman, even though I’d definitely agree that assault by bear would be believed more readily than either.

But men are more statistically likely to commit violent crime! So actually it makes sense that people would be more afraid to meet a man over a bear instead of a woman over a bear!

And people close to you are more statistically likely to commit violent crimes against you than strangers are, and yet I’m not seeing people out here using that statistic to demonize the idea of close friends going hiking together by-way-of “would you rather go hiking in a remote area alone and come across a bear or would you rather trade-off that bear encounter with a having gone with a friend?” Even though you’re even more likely to be violently assaulted by someone you know than some random man you encounter, so you’d think that the same people wanting to enforce fear of being in remote areas with strange men would want to enforce fear of being in remote areas with those you’re close with.

The thing is, what they’re doing is reinforcing their own bio/gender-essentialism (or sometimes reinforcing a trauma response, or both at once, but I’m specifically talking about the bio/gender-essentialism in this post (and also reinforcing stranger danger stuff they may have internalized but that’s even further digression)), as I said, by cherry picking which statistics they’re using to speak about the dangers of existing in the world.

And this isn’t even getting into how many other unstated assumptions are going on in the reading of the question and subsequent answer of it—just to quickly point out one: the assumption that we’re dealing with a potentially malicious man pops up very quickly in a lot of discussions, but I don’t often see people making similar assumption of the bear they’re considering being a bear that is more likely to aggress at you than the average bear (for example, by you unknowingly being between a mother bear and her cubs, by the bear being seriously ill or injured…)

But yeah, anyway, all of this to say that the “man vs bear” thing serves no utility beyond maybe dissecting the question further to see in what other ways we as people will create new ways to serve up the same bio-/gender-essentialism.

[quitealotofsodapop]

Sun Wukong is such a cool character across the board since if you genderbent the character - very little would change other than the reactions of those around them.

LMK: Same character. Only difference is brief confusion from MK and Tang, who adjust their pronouns when speaking of Dawn accordingly. Relationship with Macaque unchanged.

Hero is Back: Short red hair, chewing on hay, tall af? Thats half the butch farmers in my county. Liuer has a brief moment of "The Great Sage is a woman?" before going straight back to fanboying about how cool Dasheng is. Zhu Bajie is likely shocked and appalled that he was defeated by a woman - tho still shoots his shot. Attract does not work on Dasheng. Story accidentally becomes a tale of a mother sacrificing her life to protect her son, and ends with the son sacrificing himself to protect his new mother.

Reborn: Still a chaotic hissing gremlin of a monkey. Brief moment of funny where the very feminine Taoist acolytes misgender Smokey as male since she still looks the same. Zhu Bajie hesistates to hit on Smokey (despite her very convincingly diguising herself as his wife during his recruitment), since she terrifies him. Smokey still arises from their false death cloaked in blue flame and lava. And still mourns the loss of Fruitie.

NewGods: Bigger plot twist of Ace's identity. No one has figured out her identity for so long (including Ao Guang) cus they all assumed SWK was a guy. Still a giggling, gambling lush. Yunxiang: "Hey whos this drunken, half-dressed old lady offerring to train me in exchange for a motorbike- oh sweet Buddha she's the Monkey King."

1999/2000 Cartoon: Sugar is already femme af. No change.

Netflix: Little character change, though Cherry's story would indirectly become a glass ceiling situation with the Immortals. Men can become immortal by killing lots of evil demons (source: Erlang & Hou Yi), but women gotta suffer (source: Guanyin). Bonus girl bonding with Lin.

Smash Legends: Starfruit leans into gender stereotypes for the views. Goes full tiktok e-girl with her asethetic. Would form punk girl band with Goldie.

And lets not forget how many live-action Sun Wukongs are played by women actors and/or stuntwomen.

Gender bending their Macaques also do not change much. Basically these monkeys could be any gender indentity and still be themselves

[redladydeath]

Went a little hog-wild with CC and decided to make demon forms for my gender swapped Hazbin Sims. Imo, it's more fun to work on AU versions of characters in the Sims since you don't have to worry about getting everything perfectly canonically accurate.

[konigbabe]

like real people do

Pairing: ID!Leon Kennedy x fem!teacher!reader | single dad AU

Word count: 5.8k

Tags/warnings: no y/n; fluff; eventual smut; p-in-v; slice of life; gendered female reader; gendered female anatomy; original kid Kennedy character

Summary: He's the sun, and you're the earth, drawn into his orbit; yet, he's your student's father. Handsome. Confident. Alluring. But off limits–at least he should be.

a/n: Inspired by @yeyinde’s ask. Also, canon ID!Leon is around 29 but Leon in this '"universe" is aged up to be in his 30s (age won't be specified but I imagine him to be in his mid-to-late 30s).

divider by @benkeibear [source]

series masterlist • masterlist • navigation • faq • AO3 • ko-fi

The voice in your head keeps telling you to be professional, the thought of spending an evening with this man hard to resist; his confident, easy-going demeanor, the way he doesn’t give up easily– “So? It’s just dinner.”

The innocence of children always manages to brighten up even the darkest of days, their smiles and eagerness to learn contagious; filling your heart with positivity. It's a feeling that's hard to come by as an adult; life's challenges tend to chip away at your soul and slowly rob you of that childhood magic.

As the clock strikes five and your shift comes to an end, the school falls into an eerie silence. A lingering sense of relief washes over you when leaving the building; you've done your part in shaping young minds.

Walking out the front door, the warmth of the sun caresses your skin, its rays sliding around your bare arms like silk.

Twisting the key in the lock, your eyes catch a glimpse of slight movement from the corner of your vision. Turning your head, you see a little girl perched on the concrete steps below, her delicate features illuminated by the warm glow of the sun.

Her hair, a cascade of light brown waves, frames her chubby cheeks and the crown of her head is adorned with blonde highlights that shimmer like golden threads.

She turns to you when you address her, slowly stepping down to her level.

"What are you still doing here," you sit down, her small backpack creating a wall between your bodies.

As you sit side by side with the little girl, basking in the comforting embrace of the sunlight, she kicks her legs up; eyes up front, both of you watch the cars pass by on the street.

The Washington Spring air’s filled with the sweet scent of blooming cherry blossoms, carried on a gentle breeze that rustles through the trees. The distant sounds of children playing in a nearby park mingle with the honking of cars and the chirping of birds, creating a symphony of noise that signifies the arrival of spring in the bustling city.

"Waiting for daddy," she says with a hint of excitement in her voice.

The little girl looks up at you, her eyes full of wonder and innocence. You can't help but wonder about the mysterious Mr Kennedy and his absence; an enigma surrounding his name.

Like a forgotten toy left on the shelf, the girl's father remains absent from any involvement in her education. Despite several months passing since her admission to your class, there has been no sign of him. No parent-teacher meetings, no Father's Day celebration, nothing.

An enigma.

"Speaking of," your voice trails off for a moment, "How’s your daddy doing?" you question her. You shouldn’t; it goes beyond your job description to put a kid in situations like these. But still–

Her eyes, a vivid shade of cerulean, sparkle like sunlit water as she gazes at you; smile wide upon the mention of her father, the young kid toys with the straps on her bag.

"He’s busy."

A pang of understanding pinches your heart.

–his presence (or rather the absurd lack of it) keeps gnawing at your brain.

"He fights monsters," the girl adds after a moment of silence; her tone more serious. It's as if she's describing a mythical hero, fighting off beasts in some far-off land.

"He seems to be busy quite a lot," you smile to ease the topic; well aware that the girl, as bright as she is, surely catches on as you keep asking the same question every week, "is your mom coming to the parent–teacher meeting?"

The girl shakes her head before she speaks, "I don’t know my mom."

Oh.

You know you shouldn’t push more; well aware of the unprofessionalism you’re displaying.

"The woman who picks you up–"

"–aunt Claire," the kid corrects you, "I’m sorry for interrupting, miss teacher."

You smile, trying to put her at ease. It's clear that she's been brought up with good manners.

Lost in how to answer her, you almost don't hear the sound of a car approaching. The girl jumps up, her face alight with excitement. A low rumble reverberates through the air as a sleek black SUV glides up to the curb, its shiny exterior reflecting the warm rays of the sun.

The tinted windows obscure the view inside the car, adding an air of mystery to the vehicle. As the car comes to a stop, the quiet hum of the engine fades to a gentle purr, and the driver's door swings open.

The girl grabs her backpack at the same time a man steps out of the car; you’re able to only see the light brown hair decorating his head.

"Daddy," the girl yelps in excitement. You stand up, dusting the invisible dust from your jeans.

He stands tall, his broad shoulders stretching the fabric of the crisp white shirt, tucked tightly into the blue dress pants. A single button undone on his collar, revealing the curve of his clavicles. The sun glints off his aviator sunglasses, hiding his eyes from view. He approaches the little girl with a warm smile as she runs into her father, you presume; standing still, watching the situation unfold before your eyes.

Lowering himself to her level, he extends his arms, inviting her in. She eagerly accepts, wrapping her little arms around his neck in a welcoming embrace.

"Hey there, pup," you manage to hear his voice; low and soft. Gentle. "Sorry I’m late; got held up by paperwork. Y’know the drill."

The kid chuckles before pulling away, a sound so pure and innocent it brings a smile to your face.

Standing back up, his face turns towards you. You're struck by his imposing presence, the way he commands attention without even trying. His chiseled jawline is dusted with a light stubble, giving him an air of ruggedness. He moves with confidence towards you, one hand enclosed with his daughter’s.

The girl tugs at the sleeve of his shirt, introducing you before he even reaches your standing point–to which he smiles gently.

"Well, nice to meet you," his hand extended in greeting, "I’m Leon Kennedy. Her dad," he nods towards the girl.

"Mr Kennedy," you murmur, taking his hand in yours; noting the callouses on his palm.

As your eyes travel up his arm, they catch sight of a fresh bandage peeking out from under his slightly rolled up sleeve. But it's not until you look up at his face that you see the true extent of his weariness. Small scratches mark his jaw, subtle hues of purple and yellow decorate his cheekbone like a watercolor painting.

It’s clear that he's been through a rough patch. Makes you wander back to the girl’s words–

("He fights monsters.")

–and maybe he does. In some twisted sense.

"I actually wanted to speak with you," you release his hand, feeling the warmth of his skin lingering on your fingertips., "are you free next Tuesday? Around one PM?"

"Am I in trouble," he chuckles; the stretch of his lips exposing a slight scar on his lower lip.

The girl tilts her head, eyes studying you intently. You can't help but notice the slight beauty marks across her neck, the softness of her features, the way she looks up at her father with curiosity.

"Not really; I just need to discuss some matters with you."

"Okay," he responds, a hint of a smirk playing at the corners of his lips, yet he remains stoic. Posed. "Sure."

"I’ll see you then," you nod and take your leave, but not before stealing a few glances at his back as he turns away from you. It’s impossible not to notice how his broad shoulders strain against the fabric, or how his hair cascades over his forehead; tousled yet somehow perfectly in place.

The weekend flies by, the days blurring together until suddenly it's Tuesday.

Despite his daughter's reassurances from yesterday that he'll be here, the uncertainty of whether he'll actually show up still grips you tightly.

A knock on the open door disturbs your grading.

"Mr Kennedy," you remark upon his arrival. The pen falls onto the desk with a clunk; back straighten, you invite him to sit on the chair prepared for him beforehand.

He’s dressed more casual–the black, expensive looking leather jacket squeaks against the wooden chair as he sits down after a simple "Hello". The faint but distinct aroma of sharp, citrusy notes wafts from his collar; the refreshing and invigorating aroma that catches your attention before your eyes trail to the bandage on his wrist.

Clearly seeing the way your eyes subconsciously linger on the piece of medical tape, Leon puts his other hand over it, shielding your view. Silently focusing your attention back on his eyes; the same blue hues as his daughter’s.

Sitting before you, legs spread apart, the undeniable similarities between him and his daughter are glaringly apparent. The way he holds himself commands respect, his posture erect and confident.

"Mr Kennedy, there’s something I wanted to discuss with you in person."

Fingers interlocking as you lean on your elbows, his gaze following your every movement like a predator stalking its prey; almost as if he’s sizing you up. His eyes watchful.

"Okay," he responds casually, a hint of question behind the simple word.

You clear your throat before continuing. "Your daughter is a remarkable child," a small smile accompanying your words. "She's well-behaved, intelligent, and often surpasses her peers."

Leon nods, lips pressed together.

"Got that from her mother, probably," he remarks. Almost bites back. Jaw tightening.

Leaning back, your fingers drum a quick rhythm against your desk.

"But we’re not here to evaluate your daughter; but you, actually, Mr Kennedy."

Leon’s brows arch up, highlighting the soft surprise that flashes across his face. The subtle shift in his expression does not go unnoticed by you.

"Didn’t know I was being evaluated," his voice trails off.

You nod in acknowledgement, sensing the man's confusion.

"You’re aware of our school assemblies, right?"

His face remains stoic, so you continue.

"Father's Day, parent-teacher meetings, career days, sports day," you list a few, hoping to spark the idea in the man’s mind.

"So," he leans back against the chair, arms folded on his chest.

With an exhale, upon your failed attempt to make him take the hint, you resolve to explaining the school rules to him.

"Our school mandates that the child’s parent or legal guardian be present at at least three of those assemblies per school year. You haven’t been present on any of them, not even last year."

He lifts his chin slightly and raises his eyebrows, eyes fixed on you with a look that suggests he's waiting for more information or an explanation.

"There’s actually a policy within out school that allows teachers to prohibit the child from participating in certain activities or events if a parent is not present–"

"–you’re kidding," Leon interjects, his tone laced with disbelief.

Raising your hand, you stop him from continuing, "and your daughter is a great student, so I don't expect that to happen to her. But with your continuous absence, she's at risk of being excluded from certain activities."

"My job keeps me busy. And I don’t really have a say in it," Leon retorts.

Arms still folded across his chest, his brows furrow in frustration. Defence sets inside his flesh; jaw slightly twitching, his eyes bore into yours.

"Maybe her mother could–"

"–not an option," he stops you before you manage to finish the sentence.

You nod in understanding. Leaving forward, you hope to appeal to Leon’s sense of responsibility a little more.

"In that case; we’re having a sports day this Friday. If you could just show up to support your daughter, I could mark it as you being present."

Leon chuckles, his voice smooth. Looking out the nearby window, he stares into the field right next to the school for a moment, deep in thought. The sunlight filtering through the window casts a warm glow on his sharp features, highlighting the intensity in his eyes.

Silence passes before he speaks up, "Wouldn't a dinner suffice instead?"

You clear your throat and try to compose yourself, feeling your heartbeat pick up at the unexpected request. "That's not very appropriate, Mr Kennedy, " you say softly, attempting to hide the fluttering in your chest. "Let's see each other at the soccer match."

"Sure. I’ll see what I can do; is that all?" he asks, head turned to the side. You gaze upon the now exposed wound on his jawline, vaguely resembling a cat’s claw scratch. The bruise colors on his cheek faded over the past few days.

"Yes," you assure him.

"Y’know, this whole thing could’ve been an email."

You smile wryly, "Would you react to that email?"

Looking back at you, there’s a flicker of mischievous dancing in his eyes. Leon's gaze holds yours for a moment longer, and you find yourself drawn to the subtle crinkles at the corners of his eyes, evidence of his amusement.

"You got me there."

The sun blankets the field in gold, casting elongated shadows of the children as they scamper around in pursuit of the ball. It’s still quite early. The air’s crisp and fresh, carrying the scent of freshly cut grass and; sound of excited cheers and shouts echo throughout the surrounding area.

It’s comforting. Soothing in a way.

With a group of teachers, you watch the little girl darting across the field, her movements resembling that of a graceful gazelle as she expertly maneuvers the ball. She weaves in and out of the other players, a look of determination etched on her youthful face.

A chorus of her name echoes across the field, drifting like a wispy trail of smoke. The other kids cheer her on as she makes her way towards the goal, her tiny frame seemingly defying the laws of physics with her quick and nimble movements.

A round of applause erupts when the ball meets the back of the net. You watch as the little girl’s teammates rush to congratulate her.

"And who is that," a woman’s voice tears your gaze away from the cheerful moment, hands stopping mid-clasp.

Curious, you look at her. The other teachers already gazing to your right. To the parking lot.

Leaning against the sleek car, its design demanding attention; even from further away, he exudes an air of quiet confidence that's impossible to ignore. Eyes covered by another set of sunglasses, the same leather jacket strains against his folded arms.

Mr Kennedy.

Leon Kennedy.

Something about him always seems to draw attention; to captivate anyone who catches a glimpse of him.

It’s odd. Uncanny–

You should know better than to think in such a way about your student’s father.

–and you wonder if it’s just you who feels that way.

As the group of teachers chatter, a voice pipes up, "Is he someone's father?"

"He has to be," the conversation carries on, "or he wouldn’t be here–"

"–or he’s a creep."

Turning to face the person who said it, you scoff at the teacher before speaking up.

"He’s her dad," You nod in the direction of the girl with a beaming smile on your face, as she energetically waves at Leon. His response, though polite, is less enthusiastic, evident by the restrained movement of his hand.

Escaping the gossip, you follow the white boundary lines of the field towards your target, the soft grass crunching beneath your feet. Leon's eyes are fixed on the field, his sharp features softened by the spring glow.

But he's quick to notice your approach, turning his head ever so slightly to the left. It makes you feel naked as he shamelessly watches you coming closer.

"Mr Kennedy," you greet him.

As you approach, the warm spring breeze ruffles your hair, the sweet scent of blooming flowers mixing with his heady aroma. Posture relaxed, his broad shoulders almost blend with the darkness of the car behind him.

"Just call me Leon."

Eyes back on the field, a tinge of carelessness in his voice, a small tug on his lips. Hesitating momentarily, you put your hands in your pockets.

"I’d rather stick to being professional."

It makes him chuckle; voice rumbling with amusement–

"You’re making me feel old," he teases.

–making your chest tighten. His words brush against your ears like the gentle rustling of leaves on a cool autumn breeze.

The lightness in his tone, the hint of playfulness, stirs something deep within you.

It’s your turn to return the light laugh. The sound mingling with the chirping of birds in the distance.

"It’s good that you’re here. Your daughter seems to appreciate it as well."

Leon's eyes flicker to his daughter, still surrounded by her teammates; a small smile tugs at the corners of his lips.

"Yeah," he says, the warmth in his voice evident, "she’s been talking about this game for a week."

"She’s really talented in sports."

A cool breeze brushes against your skin as he removes his sunglasses. Eyes reminiscent of the clear waters of a mountain lake–the color seems to deepen and intensify as he looks at you, drawing you in.

"That she got from me," the corners of his mouth curve up into a charming smile. His voice deep and smooth, like a glass of well-aged whiskey. You can sense his confidence, the way he carries himself with ease, and it's hard not to be drawn in.

It's alluring. The way he exudes a sense of self-assurance.

Smiling lightly, hand resting on the cool hood of his car, you both watch the children race each other. Cheers fill the soccer fields.

Even in momentarily silence, it’s comfortable–

"Well, she certainly inherited some good genes, Mr Kennedy."

–there’s no awkward cluster around the two of you. It’s natural.

It draws Leon’s attention back to you. Arms folded, his fingers sneak around his bicep, gripping gently as he shamelessly looks at you. His face a canvas of chiseled features and sharp lines. reminiscent of a Greek statue carved out of marble. A faint scent of musk and cologne lingers around him, blending with the sweet aroma of blooming flowers in the air.

"Just so you know, miss teacher," his voice soft melody that lingers in your mind, "the dinner invitation still stands."

It’s tempting.

The words hang in the air, tantalizingly close.

A whistle cuts through the sounds of the soccer field, interrupting the moment. Leon’s attention briefly flickers towards his daughter, checking as the little girl sprints towards the two of you, before returning to your face.

"And I should remind you, Mr Kennedy, that it’s not very appropriate to ask your daughter’s teacher out."

The voice in your head keeps telling you to be professional, the thought of spending an evening with this man is hard to resist though. His confident, easy-going demeanor, the way he doesn’t give up easily–

"So? It’s just dinner," his tone is almost conspiratorial, as if he's sharing a secret with you.

–it makes you feel alive.

(Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. It’s not strictly forbidden.

Only frown upon. Harshly.)

It's like he's the sun, and you're the earth, drawn into his orbit.

"Daddy," his daughter doesn’t hesitate, jumping straight into her father’s arm; yet Leon isn’t phased at all, hoisting her into his arms, "Did you see my goal?"

"I did, pup," arm sneaking underneath her knees, you notice the bandage gone, "you killed it."

"Miss teacher," the kid addresses you, hand sneaking into her dad’s hair to hold him tightly while looking up at you with bright, curious eyes, "Did you see me? Did you see my goal?"

"Of course," you answer with a warm smile, "you did great. Seems like you got good genes for it."

The little girl beams with pride, hugging her father even tighter. Leon chuckles, the sound low and rich, and nods his head in agreement.

"I’ll see you on Monday then; pleasure seeing you, Mr Kennedy," as you turn to leave, you can't help but feel a twinge of regret.

The low hum of chatter fills the air, punctuated by occasional laughter and the clink of glasses. The dim lighting casts a warm glow over the wooden booths and bar, giving the place a cozy feel. The smell of fried food and beer lingers in the air, adding to the ambiance of the traditional American pub.

From a corner, a live band plays classic rock tunes, and the patrons nod along to the rhythm, singing softly under their breaths. It's a perfect spot to unwind after a long workday, catch up with friends. Or even make new connections.

Your little freedom.

Away from responsibilities. From the stress of daily life.

This is your escape, your sanctuary, where you can let loose and just be yourself.

Coming to the bartender, you order another round for the group you’re with, only to be taken back by a familiar voice saying your name.

Turning to look at the man by your right, the white stripes on his jacket contrast against the dim, warm ambiance of the room. Fingers tapping on the rim of the glass of whiskey, he takes a sip, his gaze fixed on you; the amber liquid catching the light, casting a glow across his features.

"Mr Kennedy," you exhale, almost in disbelief by the sudden situation.

Mind whirling with surprise and curiosity; the bar is chill against your exposed arm as you lean onto it, turning to look at the man by your side.

"Wouldn’t expect a teacher to be in a bar on Friday night," he smirks, the corner of his lips curving up in amusement.

"We’re not as frigid as people have us to be," you replied, feeling a smile tug at the corners of your lips.

Voice like a smoldering flame, waiting to be ignited, he tilts the glass towards you, "Oh, really."

The allure of his presence tangible.

A gravitational pull.

"Well, Mr Kennedy," the words roll off your tongue smoothly, "I suppose we all have our ways of letting loose after a hard week."

He chuckles, the sound deep and throaty; making your pulse quicken, heartbeat pick up. "I couldn't agree more," he says, taking another sip of his drink.

You study him for a moment; taking in the way his eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles, how his hair fal across his forehead in a disheveled yet stylish way. There’s something undeniably attractive about him, something that draws you in against all odds–

–like a moth to a flame.

Life has a funny way of working out.

You should stop.

But ‘should’ doesn’t exist in the moment of impulse. In the realm of desire. Pure, unblistered passion. The temptation to follow desire is too strong–

The world falls away.

–and all thought of 'should' dissipates.

Leon's hands slide around your thighs, gripping the flesh firmly as his body pushes against yours. Pinned to the wall; his lips trail the pulse of your neck. The tip of his tongue leaving wet patches on the heated skin.

The sudden intrusion of reality makes you gasp,"What about—".

It’s Leon’s hand on your breast; squeezing, teasing the clothed flesh through the thin material, thumbing at the erect nipple, that earns him a moan. His daughter’s name spilling over into a sound so soft. Inviting.

Like a hummingbird.

A content hum echoes in his chest; pressed tightly against yours. Feeling the muscles contract beneath you, respond to your movement; to the way your hips press against the growing bulge in his pants.

"—she’s stayin’ at my friend’s," he mumbles against the curve of your collarbones, teeth grazing the firm area.

With a strong grip, your fingers entangle in his hair. The texture soft and silky, like running your hands through fine threads of spun gold.

"Isn’t she young for sleepovers?"

It makes him look at you. Eyes glazed over; hungry. Primal–

He pulls you into an embrace, arm wrapping around your back, his palm cupping your ass. The heat of his body seeps through your clothing, searing your skin with its intensity, his breath ghosting over your lips as he whispers, "I really don’t wanna talk about my kid right now."

It’s a command rather than anything else.

Followed by your clothes.

He has you bare before you make up your mind.

–causing your skin to crawl.

With every touch, every whisper, every breath, he leaves you feeling more exposed, more vulnerable.

Limbs tangled together, lips pressed against each other; there’s no beginning and no end. When one begins, the other follows, like an unbroken circle of passion and desire.

Utter consumption by the fire inside you.

Leon’s hands feel scorching. Each stroke branding your skin.

He splits your apart, fills you to the brim. The head of his cock kisses the innermost parts of you as you stay seated on top of him. Nails scratching the firm muscle of his breastplate; he grips your sides. Digs his fingers into the soft, plump flesh there.

Teeth nip at your chin. Gently nibbles accompanied by your hips circling on top of him.

Cascade of groans, grunts and moans echo throughout Leon’s bedroom; each sound building on the other to create a crescendo of pleasure. The mattress beneath you creaks and strains under your knees.

Lost in the feeling.

His words a salacious melody; sung in a sultry whisper followed by his teeth, nibling at your earlobe; securing your grip on his shoulders feeling the strength of his muscles as he guides your moves.

Up and down. Up and down.

Circle your hips when your pelvis meets his. When your ass touches his thighs; when his fingers dig into the round flesh.

The rhythm builds, the tension mounting with every breath. The ache of desire deep inside, a longing that can only be sated by him. With each movement, you feel closer to the edge, your body aching for release.

Leon whispers encouragement, his voice like a caress against your skin. Head buried in the crook of your neck, your arms tighten around his shoulder. Face buried in the top of his head, the scent of him fills your senses; a heady, intoxicating aroma that envelops you in its warmth.

You breathe him in, savoring the subtle notes of bergamot and spice, the rich undertones of musk and earthiness.

Leon’s name leaves your lips in a soft, breathless moan, a prayer to the god of pleasure.

His lips brush against your collarbone, lingering there for a moment before trailing lower, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Skin erupting in goosebumps as his breath tickles your chest, your body bows like a taut bowstring, a supplication to his touch. Offering yourself up to him completely.

Hands roam over your body, tracing the curves and planes of your skin with reverent fingers. As if he knows just where to touch you.

With a strong pull and push, your back meets the hard mattress. His hands move over you like a painter's brush, each stroke bringing out a new hue of pleasure. Hips grinding against yours.

Pressing your body closer to his, chest to chest, he rocks against you. The intensity of his movements leaves you gasping for air, a low moan escaping your lips as you feel yourself getting closer to the edge. His hands grip your hips tightly, fingers digging into your skin as he continues to rut into you.

Long lost is the slow motion–

Your pelvis meets his in a harsh, demanding thrust.

–now he’s chasing his own high. His own release.

His hand slides to cup your jaw, grip your shoulder, eyes boring into yours; intense and unwavering, as if he’s trying to read your thoughts through the depth of your eyes. Consumed by the heat of you.

Head thrown back, you close your eyes; unable to match the fire in his as he grinds against you; his breaths ragged gasps, the only sound in the room the soft rustling of sheets and the slapping of skin against skin.

Leon knows he won’t last long. Not with the way your mouth remains agape, nails digging into the firm tendons of his biceps; heels digging into the flesh of his ass, pushing him deeper. Demanding him to go harder.

You just look so pretty underneath him.

Fingertips trace the warm flesh of your curves. They move slowly, mapping the supple contours of your body with precision; each touch deliberate, a way of committing the curves of your form to memory.

The sensation is electric, every nerve ending on high alert.

His thumb finds your clit, circling it with teasing precision, a feather-light touch. Pushing your hips into his, he obliges your silent demand – adding a bit more pressure with each pass. The slow, steady rhythm of his touch in bright contrast to the sharp thrusts.

Building the tension inside you, until you feel like you might burst. But he doesn't let up, not yet. He's savoring every moment, enjoying the way you writhe beneath him.

Your breath hitches, body tensing as he works you with an almost clinical precision. The ache between your legs grows, spreading through your entire body. He watches you, gauging your reactions, and adjusts his touch accordingly.

The way he focuses on you, with a singular, unwavering intensity, is both thrilling and terrifying.

As for Leon, every movement, every sound, is calculated. He wants to make this last. He wants to make you lose control.

His muscles tense as he drives into you, each thrust bringing him closer to the edge. His breaths come in short gasps, matching the rhythm of your moans. The heat between you intensifies, a physical force that binds you together.

With one final push, final flick of a thumb, he takes you over the edge, his name on your lips.

Clenching around him, walls fluttering, his thrusts grow slow. Leisurely.

As if he’s tantalizing himself. Savoring the feel before he lets go with a groan; a guttural sound that echoes through the bedroom; body spasming. The two of you entwined in a moment of pure, unadulterated bliss.

There should be some sort of regret.

Standing by the foot of Leon’s bed, still searching for your clothes amid the scattered chaos of the apartment, covered by a random shirt you’ve found on the ground (that’s definitely not the one you’ve come with), you can’t help but be drawn to the sleeping man lying before you.

The sheets barely cover the curve of his lower back, and even in slumber, the muscles of his back remain visible; the outline of his physique remains defined and sharp, even in relaxation. The memory of his back muscles beneath your palms lingers on your skin, as if he were still present with you in that moment.

There’s no regret.

Exiting the bedroom, you walk past the kitchen into the hallway. The emptiness of the space is palpable, with nothing adorning the plain white walls; no family photos or decorations to add personality. Only the essential pieces of furniture remain. The floor creaks beneath your bare feet as you open the door closer to you–

(It’s almost like he doesn’t have anyone.

A sense of desolation creeps in you.)

–and are met with a blinding contrast to the rest of the apartment. Rainbow colored sheets neatly tucked into the small bed, pillows in shape of various animals. Light furniture covered in school supplies; and a photo decorating the nightstand.

You pick it up, immediately recognized the two people. It might be the first time you’re seeing Leon actually smile, wide and bright. Happy; with his daughter tightly wrapped in his arms. Faces pressed together, smiling at the camera.

"I hope you're not trying to steal anything," Leon's voice interrupts your reverie; low and husky, still laced by the morning sleep, "I don't have much, y’know."

As you pivot to face him, you can't resist noticing how his bare feet stand out against his fully-clothed form. Hair tousled and messy, only adding to his rugged appeal.

An irresistible wave of attraction washes over you as you scrutinize his appearance, and his playful tone only adds fuel to the fire.

"Don't worry, I'm not after your prized possessions," you reply with a smirk, feeling emboldened by his proximity.

Leon's eyes twinkle mischievously as he steps closer to you, his warm breath brushing against your cheek. "Well, in that case, what’re you after?"

"I was just looking for a bathroom."

Leon's gaze lingers on you, lips curled up in a half-smile. "The bathroom’s down the hall to the right," he points with a nod of his head.

You nod back, trying to ignore the electric sensation that courses through you at his proximity. "Thanks," you say, stepping past him towards the direction he indicated.

As you walk down the hallway, you can't shake off the feeling of emptiness that you felt earlier. It's clear that Leon lives a minimalist lifestyle, but the lack of personal touches leaves you with a sense of melancholy.

Entering the bathroom, you take a moment to splash water on your face, trying to compose yourself before facing Leon again.

His voice echoes through the small apartment as you make your way towards his voice, entering the kitchen; you're struck by how immaculate it is. Everything’s in its place, and there isn't a single dish out of place. The countertop is spotless, the sink free of any debris, the stainless-steel appliances gleam in the light.

The scent of freshly brewed coffee fills the air with the morning sun streaming through the windows, casting a warm glow over the room.

"I’ll pick her up in an hour," Leon stands in front of the refrigerator, two mugs in one hand, bare feet making a soft thumping sound against the linoleum floor. His hair’s still tousled from sleep, his t-shirt is wrinkled, clinging to his muscles as he holds the phone to his ear.

There’s a certain charm to his disheveled appearance that you find appealing.

Looking at you, he makes no effort to stop the call, instead a playful undertones his voice as he hands you a mug and motions towards the coffee machine, "yeah, just woke up. Had a long night."

Shaking your head at his words; he watches you with a small, amused smile, the corners of his lips twitching upwards.

"See you then. Bye, Claire,” he ends the call, turning his full attention to you.

"Y’know, miss teacher," he pours himself a glass of water, "if you just wanted to skip the whole dinner thing, you should’ve just said."

[atrocityobsession]

Palatal Porcine

Hannibal x M!Reader (can be read as GN tbh, very few gendered terms.)

cw: dead dove, do not eat. Cannibalism, manipulation, murder, catcalling, implied age gap...

no smut, proof read 1x.

His grip around your waist tightened inexorably. A muscle in his jaw ticked as he noticed the man ogling you a few seats down in the dim theater. Hannibal could hardly concentrate on the music; the swell of the orchestra might as well have been the discordant hum of frayed wires. Of course, you seemed utterly oblivious to the crude leers of the man, your eyes fixated on the spectacle upon the stage before you.  

You could feel Hannibal stiffen next to you, though his mask of reverence never slipped, his facial features remaining stoic and his posture flawless. You turned slightly to peer at him, unable to discern what had gotten him so on edge. But your attention was quickly recaptivated by the opera singer as the aria began. However, unbeknownst to you, the unknown man’s eyes never left yours, tracing the lines of your jaw, the contours of your face, dark and hungry– a brazen lack of subtlety. Undoubtedly, he was aiming for your attention, willing you, telepathically urging you to glance over and meet his dark eyes. Hannibal’s acute awareness of the situation never faltered, even as he forced himself to train his eyes upon the stage. 

When the opera ended, and after the waves of applause had subsided, Hannibal tried to steer you out of the opera hall as fast as possible, brushing off the familiar niceties of acquaintances also in the audience. You took notice of this; Hannibal was behaving uncharacteristically, shedding his usual restraint and commitment to civility as he bluntly pulled you through the crowd without so much as a second glance. But the man had other intentions for you, beelining to intercept where you were walking with Hannibal, stepping out before you. Hannibal steeled himself, attempting to pull you along, past him and out the doors, but halted when the prowler shot his arm out, preventing any recourse and effectively creating a barrier between you and Hannibal.  

“Ciao, bellissimo,” the man purred, his voice oily and deep, his breath hot on your cheek. You flinched at the closeness, instinctively stepping back and, in the process, unwittingly distancing yourself further from Hannibal.

“You’re as pretty as a dream,” the man cooed at you, his hand reaching up to stroke your arm through the fabric of your suit. “I would much rather stare at you all day than anything up on that stage.”

Your face flushed a cherry red, and you began to sputter, glancing up at Hannibal for aid, your eyes wide as saucers. As Hannibal opened his mouth to speak, the man quickly cut him off. The air was permeated by the scent of cheap cologne and stale smoke, and the sour cloud made Hannibal’s nose wrinkle in distaste. 

“Darling, you are simply beautiful, I must say, I’m quite enamored. Why don’t you ditch the old geezer and come with me? I’m certain I could make it worth your while,” The man said, licking his lips before he picked up your limp hand, kissing your knuckles. He left behind a smear of saliva. A wave of revulsion and panic flooded your senses, and you struggled to come up with a response besides a feeble attempt to tug your hand out from his grasp. The man simply chuckled and held you tighter, your knuckles turning white under his harsh hold. Hannibal’s hand shot out, a bruising grip on the man’s shoulder, forcing him back. 

“The gentleman is not interested,” Hannibal interjected, his voice steady but dripping with malice. “It would serve you well to kindly remove yourself.” He said with a predatory smile in an attempt to maintain his manners among his peers. The man sighed, a sleazy smile plastered on his lips. He rolled his eyes at Hannibal, shouldering off the older man’s hand. 

“Ah, but he can speak for himself, can’t he?” the question was directed to Hannibal, but his eyes were still fixated on you, raking you up and down, and again, he licked his lips.

“Surely, someone as exquisite as yourself would want to experience the passions of a real man, yes?” This question was directed at you. Your mouth opened and closed fast as you searched for words, your mouth suddenly dry.

Hannibal exhaled sharply at the comment. Hannibal’s demeanor was that of barely veiled rage, condensing the urge to rip the man apart with his teeth into a mere shove. The man laughed as he was forced back, releasing your hand in the process. 

Hannibal took the opening, slinging his arm around your waist and quickly guiding you out of the opera hall. His free hand reached around to grab the hand the man had offended with his touch, and Hannibal began to rub small circles into your hand soothingly. He leaned down, whispering into your ear. “Pay him no mind,” his voice low and smooth as velvet. His eyes flickered back, side-eyeing the man who stood behind you. “Swine such as him is quite clearly beneath your notice.”

The man chose this moment to wolf whistle, calling out to you. “I hate to see you leave, but I love to watch you go!” He called out. Hannibal urged you on faster, committing the man's face to his memory. Transgressions of this caliber hardly ever went unpunished, especially not one as egregious as the execrable display that had occurred tonight— and Hannibal would see to it personally that justice would be served.

⋅˚₊⊹₊˚‧︵‿‧ ୨୧ ‧₊‿︵‧ ˚₊⊹⋅˚₊

Days passed, and you had long since forgotten the encounter at the opera house. You were a little more focused on the fact that Hannibal’s presence in your life over the past few weeks had been noticeably sparse. He had a habit of, every so often, disappearing from your life like this, but despite knowing this, you couldn’t shake the feeling this time; something else was up.

Hannibal finally reached out after one long week, with it, an invitation for dinner at his house. This was a common occurrence, as he absolutely adored cooking dinner for you. You accepted happily, relieved that he had finally made space in his busy schedule to see you. You arrived at the Lecter household fifteen minutes before eight. You knew Hannibal valued manners, and punctuality was one of the most important. In no time, you were situated at his dining room table. Soft piano filled the room, with the occasional clatter of cutlery in the background emanating from the kitchen. Transcendental Etude No. 6 in G minor. One of your favorites.

Hannibal didn’t make you wait long, setting down a covered platter before your seat. He halted, hovering over your sitting form before placing a small kiss on the top of your head. You smiled and let out a pleased exhale. Well, he was certainly feeling affectionate today. You waited for him to take his seat–the head of the table– before you moved to uncover the platter, staring down at the dish. It was foreign to you, as most of his dishes were. Hannibal took great pride in delineating each aspect of every meal he prepared, his words scrupulous. This evening was no different– as you began to take in the dish before, he started to speak with magniloquence almost immediately. 

“Today, I’ve prepared a treat especially for you, my little lamb. Langue de Porc. A French delicacy. Pork tongue. Prior to the time of you or I, langue de porc was considered a delicacy, reserved for the aristocracy and the upper echelons of society. It was a symbol of status, of refinement. A way to demonstrate one's sophistication and worldliness, often in elaborate presentations or terrines,” Hannibal explained as he began to cut into his own dish. You just stared down at the platter, your stomach inexplicably churning. For some unknown reason, you were a mix of anxiety, and as Hannibal spoke, with each word, your sense of unease grew stronger. “The meat itself was said to be infused with certain properties. Properties that served to heighten the senses.” 

You squirmed in your seat, hesitantly picking up your fork and knife. You cracked a smile, though your eyes were swimming with trepidation. Hannibal’s tone was darker, his demeanor clouded with something sinister. He watched with a sly smirk as you cut off a piece of the peculiarly shaped meat. You chewed slowly, savoring the taste. It was unique, with a mild and fatty flavor that melted into your mouth. Hannibal watched you, focusing on the way your jaw worked around the bite as if he were counting each time your mandible contracted.

Only when he watched your Adam’s apple bob, the indication that you had swallowed, did Hannibal relax, offering you a triumphant smile. You cracked a smile in an attempt to lighten the tension. “Kind of small for a pig,” You remarked. It was your lame attempt at small talk. 

Hannibal’s smile begins to stretch unnaturally at the corners. What had started as a harmless quirk of his lips had begun to transform into something sinister, his teeth bared in a grin more reminiscent of a predator; the warmth had drained away from his features, leaving behind a chilling sense of malice. 

Surely you had imagined it, right? The way his eyes seemed to glint with a predatory sharpness, dark and unyielding. The shadows that seemed to deepen around his features– his cheekbones sharpening, his lips curled up almost unnaturally. And then he began to speak, his voice slithering through the air. It was carried on an unnatural calm as if he reveled in the discomfort he was causing. Each syllable seemed to hang in the air. You dropped your fork onto the dining table, suddenly sick with the implication of his words.

“Ah, yes. An astute observation. When measured from the oropharynx, a typical length for a hog is roughly thirteen centimeters.” Hannibal casually began to cut off another tongue piece, savoring it. “This particular type of swine, however, usually measures around eight and a half centimeters.” His eyes were dark pools of onyx. Your breathing increased, knowing his following words. Willing them not to be said. 

Hannibal leaned forward so that his face was a hand’s breadth away. Your head was swimming. “Yes, my little lamb. This particular pig had a foul mouth and a tongue better suited for a butcher’s block than a human mouth.” 

As the words settled into the dimly lit dining room, your vision began to swim, your chest heaving. Undoubtedly, Hannibal had spent the days you had been apart hunting down the foul-mouthed man from the opera, slaughtering the offending profligate and, as some sick and twisted form of recompense, serving his tongue up to you on a salver--his mind diseased with perverted justice.

Hannibal cooed at you, trailing the back of his hand down your face, his fingers catching under your chin as he guided you to look up at him. 

“Oh, mon amour,” He crooned, his hand cool against your skin that was feverish with anxiety. “You look positively green. Is this idea of such delights too much for your delicate constitution?” 

Hannibal released your chin, tutting in disappointment. “Here I thought you might be a little more appreciative to my gift.” Hannibal resumed eating, his eyes never leaving yours. “A dish with a garnish of retribution. Don’t be afraid…” His voice trails lower as he lifts his own fork, a piece of the tongue skewered on the edge, putting it against your lips. The meat easily slides past your plump lips, landing on your tongue. Under his unyielding gaze, you find it impossible to deny him.

“There we go,” He says softly. “Can you hear the sound of your mind breaking when you deny yourself?” The meat settled like a brick in your stomach. “Surrender to the hunger,” he insisted, his breath ghosting over your cheek as he leaned in closer. 

You mechanically picked up your fork, slicing off a piece of the fatty pink meat, and bringing it to your mouth with much chagrin. And you realized… As you bit down and soft flesh gave way with a telltale wet squelch, your teeth coated in a greasy sheen, that this was your indoctrination. That this is what a soul’s slaughter could look like and that Hannibal was going to drag you down with him too, a substitute god for when you longed for devotion. The slimy texture lingered in your mouth, refusing to be swallowed easily. It was as if the dish itself had no intention of being forgotten, clinging to you in a way that made your stomach churn. You had become exactly what he had wanted you to be as you fell into disgrace.

⋅˚₊⊹₊˚‧︵‿‧ ୨୧ ‧₊‿︵‧ ˚₊⊹⋅˚₊

thanks so much for reading. I had this idea swirling in the noggin for about a year now and finally decided to write it. It still isn't as fleshed out as I had hoped, but alas... hopefully, I get the fervor to write more. I swear something possessed me so I finished this entire thing in about two hours 。°(°.◜ᯅ◝°)°。

[secondcupforyou]

seventeen as horrible pick-up lines, a carat/valentine’s day special 🩷🩵

disclaimer, this is purely for entertainment purposes and does not reflect who seventeen are as people.

pairing! ot13 (separate) x gender neutral! reader

warnings! light swearing

word count! ~1k words total

author’s note! i found a list of horrible pick-up lines and couldn’t stop myself…

Seungcheol

“I can't taste my cherry lip gloss! Can you give it a try?”

“Huh? Like you want me to try it out?” you asked as you rummaged around your bag. You had been trying to find your phone to get directions for the restaurant you got reservations for. After you found it, you looked up to see Seungcheol’s pouty face. At that, you realised he was probably asking for something less explicit. “Oh, was that you asking to kiss me? You should have been more clear.”

Jeonghan

“Are you iron? Cause I don’t get enough of you.”

”Last time I checked, I wasn’t Iron Man, so I would check somewhere else.” you joked. However, you weren’t fully expecting the whining that would come after it. As you began to laugh at his reaction, Jeonghan’s complaining got louder. Through broken laughs, you tried to speak, “C’mon, I know you could do better than that.”

Joshua

“On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?”

You looked up from your textbook as you heard Joshua’s voice. The two of you were supposed to be working on a project your professor had assigned you for the week. As you looked into his eyes, his small smile irked you just enough to complain: “Can’t you ask like a normal person? If you did, then maybe I would be free.”

Before he could respond, you began to work on the assignment once again.

Jun

“Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”

You had lost track of the amount of times Jun had used different pick-up lines throughout the day. It started when you first saw each other today, and it hasn’t stopped since. While it was endearing for you, you could also see the annoyance building up from your friends. With a quick laugh, you leaned into his ear to whisper, “I would stop before one of them ends up punching you.”

Soonyoung

“This date is like a big bowl of Frosted Flakes. It’s grrrrrrrrreat!”

When Soonyoung said this to you, you couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe it was because of his complete seriousness as he looked you straight in the eyes, or maybe it was because of the silence that filled the room before. Either way, you weren’t expecting him to tell you a stupid pick-up line.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” you were finally able to ask as your laughs began to calm down.

Wonwoo

“Good thing I have a library card, because I'm checking you out.”

Maybe it was because you were at the library that this was so cheesy, but you don’t think it would change much. He quickly moved to continue browsing through the books on the shelves; however, you could see a hint of blush lie across his cheeks. It made you smile.

“Ya’ know,” you began, “if you didn’t read books, then this would have been more awkward.”

Jihoon

“To quote the poet Lee Woozi, ‘Even if my lips are dry, I need to say this, baby: I adore you.’”

“Did you just use your own song to try to pick me up?” you said as you attempted to close the door to his studio. You had just ran to get some snacks from the convenience store before the two of you worked on music for the night, so your hands were filled with snacks. After watching you struggle a bit with the door, Jihoon got out of his chair to close the door for you. You whispered a small ‘thanks’ before setting them down on the table.

Seokmin

“I thought happiness started with ‘h,’ but turns out it begins with ‘u.’”

“And my happiness begins with ‘seok’ and ends with ‘min,’” you laughed as you brought the cup of coffee to your lips. Looking up from your cup, you saw Seokmin’s bright smile at your joke; however, you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed by it. “That joke was so awkward. I’m sorry.”

Mingyu

“Can I get your soccer jersey? I really want your name and number.”

At first, the line went over your head. One, you don’t play soccer. Two, Mingyu already had both your name and number. Three, why would Mingyu even use a pick-up line while talking to you? Though, the longer you took to respond, the more he began to pout.

As you watched him sulk, you came to the realisation quickly, “Oh, wait, that pick-up line was directed at me?”

Minghao

“Are you a parking ticket? Cause you've got fine written all over you.”

Minghao’s face was distraught, almost as if he was currently questioning his sanity. The sight of it was comedic. You slowly began to laugh at the situation, asking the question, “Who dared you to say that?”

Once you asked that, you could see the relief on his face.

Seungkwan

“If you're a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.”

“Damn, does that mean it’s cannibalism for me to eat pineapples,” you said as you picked a bunch of bananas. You and Seungkwan had been shopping for your groceries for the week as you had just run out of cooking ingredients. After checking the quality of the bananas, you put them in the cart you were pushing around. “Good thing I like tangerines then.”

Vernon

“Did I tell you I'm filthy rich and my mother's dead?”

“Okay, yeah, that is pretty bad,” you admitted as you picked up a piece of chocolate. The two of you had been reading through lists of pick-up lines to try to find the worst one. At first, it started as a bit of a competition, but you had slowly lost the competitiveness of it. Scrolling through your phone, you tried to find one that was just as bad to beat Vernon’s. “What about this one…”

Chan

“Math is so confusing. It's always talking about x and y and never you and I.”

“I know that was a pick-up line, but I feel like using the variables ‘u’ and ‘i’ would make it worse, “ you said as you finished up the math problem in your textbook. Chan laughed as he grabbed a pencil sharpener from your pencil case. “No, like, seriously. Imagine writing them even just a little bit differently then, all of sudden, it is a 0 or a 1.”

mirajane’s rambles! i actually have no idea how i did this in a couple hours. my found this website where they were referring to pick-up lines as “rizz” lines, and i spiralled lmao. i had fun tho

happy valentine’s and carat day, everyone! <33

all likes/reblogs/comments are appreciated!

[itsdori-lover]

Cherry Blossom Connection

Erm.. hey y'all! This my first post on here so PLEASE BE NICE 😞...

Any constructive criticism is greatly appreciated!!

Summary: You're invited by your best friend Mina to the club, you think you won't meet anyone interesting but to your surprise, you do.. Some notes: you're gender neutral but has girlalala parts!!, Izuku is asian & hispanic! I think that's it tho... :)

TW!!: Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Spanking, Shotgun Kissing, Creampie 🙃

I walked in the club, the music thumping and people dancing. Honestly I didn’t want to be here today, but I was forced by Mina. 

[ FLASHBACK!!] 

I just got out of the shower, feeling refreshed and ready for bed until I heard my Tyler, the creator ringtone going off. I let out a sigh before picking up my phone to answer. “ Yes minaaa!~” I said as I stretched out her name for the effects. “ Girl get dressed and get to the bar, I sent you the Addie. See you in an hour!!!” She said before she hung up. ‘Damn she could have at least let me get a word in…’ I thought before picking out my clothes.

[ FLASHBACK OVER!!!]

It smelled like drunk people and weed. How amazing… Anyway, I walked to the bar ordering a frozen raspberry margarita. If i was forced here, i’m at least gonna get tipsyyy! Speaking of being forced here, I looked around for Mina and I found her making out with this red head. Seems like she’s getting some dick tonight 🤭. I need to really find myself a boo, but all these guys look like perverts so… I probably won’t find anyone today. 

As I ordered another Margarita and a shot, My song ‘ Anxious ’ came on. Of course I have to get up and dance. I got up, making my way to the dance floor. I swayed my hips, shaking my ass and moving my arms around my body as I danced. I continued until I felt hands snake across my hips. Listen, I don't play when it comes to clubs, I'm always ready to kick ass. my hands rated E for EVERYONE!!! I turned around, ready for it to be a perv but it turned out to be a green haired Asian boy. ooo he was so good looking. He had green eyes, freckles, and two deep dimples that popped out with the slightest smile. 

My attitude immediately changed as I took in his looks. “ Hi beautiful, what’s your name?” He asked as he continued to sway with me. I stared at him before turning back around, ignoring his question. “ hmm~ playing hard to get huh? that’s fine by me” He whispered in my ear. His deep voice sent my heart to cloud 9. God he sounded so sexy, but I can't let him have me that easily. as we danced together, My favorite part came on. Just to be bold and get a reaction, I rubbed my ass against him. His grip got tighter as he rubbed circles into my back.

We danced some more until we got a tad bit tired. He walked me to a booth with a bunch of liquor bottles laying around. “ Now will you tell me your name, pretty girl?” He said as he rubbed circles into my thighs. “ It's (your name), what about you, pretty boy?” I retaliated, leaning forward to stare in his eyes. He stared at me back for a few seconds before leaning back into the sofa, “ it’s Izuku Midoriya.” After introducing ourselves, we got into a conversation about anything and everything. 

Soon it got late and the club was closing. By this time, I completely forgot about Mina. I guess I'll just have to call her tomorrow to make sure she's still alive. Honestly I didn’t want to leave Izuku, it seemed like he was thinking the same thing as he led me to his car. As I got into his 2023 BMW I admired his red interior, it fits him so well. Sexy yet classy… Anyway we continued our talk, when I looked back at him he was rollin up a blunt. I stared at him as he licked the paper before using his hands to smooth it down. God he looked so sexy, definitely had the kitty purring… 😍 (LMAOOO) 

I didn’t even realize he started to stare right back at me until he broke me out of my thoughts with a question. “ Do you smoke?” “ Of course I do” I stated before turning away from him again. When he tried to light the blunt, his lighter wasn’t working. I leaned in and flicked mine up to light it. The fire made his face look so detailed and fine as he stared at me with that look in his eyes. He breathed in before blowing the smoke out of his nose. He then passed the blunt to me so I could hit. As soon as the smoke filled my lungs, I felt all the worries and embarrassment fade away. 

We passed the blunt back and forth, both of us getting our fill. Izuku stared at me before speaking “ Te ves tan hermosa mamas” I stopped mid blow out to stare at him in awe. “ You know spanish??” He chuckled before saying “ I’m hispanic too, mi amor” I smiled at him, making a mental note of that. “ I see, that makes sense” I said before passing the blunt to him. As he took his hit, he looked at me and grabbed my chin. Izuku pulled me in saying “ Open your mouth, Mamas” before blowing smoke into my mouth. Our eyes said so many words our mouth couldn’t say. 

He moved his lips close to mine before kissing me. Our kiss was sweet at first before becoming sensual and hungry. We were hungry for each other's taste and warmth. As Izuku kissed me, He stubbed our blunt and dropped it somewhere on the floor. He grabbed my hips and lifted me onto his lap, his hands roamed my body as I moaned in his mouth. I rutted my hips against his, needing friction to tame the firing feeling on my body.

Izuku kissed down my neck, looking and searching for my sweet spot all while leaving purplish marks all over my neck. We grinded on each other, searching for pleasure while touching every place we can. His hands moved to my ass, cuffing it before sliding his hands inside my panties. His fingers circled my clit, catching my breath in my throat. “ U-ugh, Izuku~” He looked up at me as he pushed my bra up and immediately latched onto my nipple, playing with the other one. My face scrunched as the pleasure moved throughout my body. 

“ more, please!” I mumbled as his finger quickend in tight circles on my clit. I felt myself getting closer and closer to my orgasm. As soon as I was about to cum, he stopped everything. “ Izuku!~” I moaned in displeasure. “ Be patient, pretty girl” Izuku whispered as he took off my panties. He moved his fingers from my clit to my hole. “ ¿Estás tan mojada ya?Que chica tan traviesa~” Izuku mainly mumbled to himself. I was too desperate for pleasure to even notice his language switch. I rutted my hips against his fingers, hoping to signal that I need some type of friction. 

He definitely got the signal as he thrusted two fingers into me at once. “ See you’re so wet, two fingers went in so easily” He commented as he thrusted his fingers at a fast but slow pace. I couldn’t even reply as he knocked my breath straight out of my lungs. “ hnnggg! wait please~” I yelped as I felt my orgasm coming. Instead of stopping, Izuku sped up hoping I would cum on his fingers. “ Go ahead, cum for me, pretty girl.” He egged on. As soon as those words slipped from his mouth, the knot came undone. Izuku kept fingering me through my orgasm as he soothed me with his words. We kissed sloppily, saliva sliding down my lips. 

He took out his cock, it was clean cut. Pretty pink tip with a mix of a dark and light shaft. Just when I thought I was done for the night, The sight of his cock got me aroused all over again. When we made eye contact, the sparks flew and before I knew it, he was positioning me on his cock. He looked at me for consent and once he got it, he lowered me onto him. I couldn’t even feel the stretch of my cunt with all of the pleasure that flowed through me. Izuku groaned as he felt the wetness surrounding his aching cock. 

Once he bottomed out, He checked up on me making sure I was comfortable and okay. When doing so he realized I was too fucked out to even understand him, so he started moving. Izuku gripped my thighs to lift me up to the tip before slamming me back down. “ Mmmfffp!~” I moaned as he fucked me with no mercy. “ Joder hermosa~” Izuku slurred into my neck. I gripped his hair and pulled it as he fucked me. For a while, all I could hear was skin slapping and loud moans. The car started to shake as he got more aggressive.

All of a sudden, all movement stopped when he pushed his seat back. “ Ride me, my love” Is all he said as he stared at me. I was so tired and out of breath, all I could do was move my hips side to side. Izuku didn’t like that so he smacked my ass. “ Hurry up hermosa…” He asserted with a hard stare. I whimpered as I placed my hands on his chest and lifted myself. I dropped myself down, moaning as I did so. “ Hngh!” He and I both moaned. One hand made its way to my hip while the other made its way to my nipple, pulling and playing with it.  I smacked myself down hard as I fucked myself onto him. I felt a familiar knot form in my stomach. I knew I was going to cum. Izuku was also close as he gripped my hips harder and his moans got more high pitched. “ I- izuku~ I’m going to-!” I couldn’t get my sentence out as I came on Izuku’s cock. I thought he would stop but he continued to fuck himself through his own orgasm. I felt him fill me up with his cum as he moaned my name. “ Joder, te sientes tan bien a mi alrededor.~” Izuku said to me as he lifted me off him. “ Get some sleep mamas, I'll clean you up” He suggested, and with that I went to sleep.