#the gayest of theater kids

[kamiishiiros]

🎈🌟 i wish happiness will come to that kind of you

[probablyapinecone]

Finally watched the Wicked movie (a whole month after it came out. I’m a disgrace to the theater kids) and I swear to GOD Glinda and Elphie are the gayest disasters I have ever seen. This means Gelphie is beating fucking Heartstopper and CaitVi in terms of gay disaster.

[disenchanteds]

ok heres more

so another alliance is ren and martyn and idk when it atarted i just know they they are like Max Gay Yearning, their ship name is treebark and a whole handful of other ship names and oh the things i could tell you about how much gay yearning they have and the amount of times they mention one another on stream and when one of them pops up on the others stream they immediately turn into gay dramaticised theater kids on the gayest play possible they are horrible and i could write an entire gdocs about all of it but lets not since this is long already

next we have bdubs etho and tango. now bdubs and etho are already close on hermitcraft and so this teamup is more like a "boyfriends and. steve." teamup where they dont even regard tango most of the time and seem to not actually really like him? idk whats going on there

next we have the Feared Duo or gem and joel, both really well known for being extremely good at pvp and Will Kill You If Provoked. they may go on a murder spree or kill themselves or spontaneously combust at any second. we may never know. right now gem is putting up with joel annoying her and trying to keep joel in line and making friends with everyone but that will def change as time goes on.

NOW the spiciest team-up, GGG and Impulse. brief history here : GGG is gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss or cleo, scott and pearl in that order i believe. they were an amazing alliance in last life. cleo and scott turned on pearl in double life and manipulated everyone into hating her. pearl kept her distance during limited life and secret life. they sorta teamed up in real life (the one-off ep april fools, they used vr) but then there was this whole thing that caused cleo to kill pearl so welp. and then now. they are all allied again. bitter, petty, but somehow allied, with biting quips and bantering with one another that can go far considering they are a teamup of british, scottish and australian. so hm. and impulse is just there. between the four of them only impulse hasnt won (scott won last life, pearl won double life, cleo won real life) and for some reason impulse has been antagonising others and scott and cleo keep dismissing pearl's trauma from double life after they left her just because she won. like okay sure. this is a team on the constant verge of breakup but the four of them have always been pretty loyal to their alliances and so what is keeping them together is just Pure Spite and "i am loyal i guess.." oh and also pearl accidentally died from fall damage first because she shrunk and shifted too close to the edge and minecraft didnt register her as an entity and just pushed her off...so

and then there is bigb, who is off doing weird stuff and being alone and generally creepy and ok. heres the thing. so bigb is african american i believe and well. theres a new wood type in minecraft called pale wood that is basically white in color and. for some reason. bigb has. on his own volition. built a giant building shaped like his minecraft avatar face except instead of using like spruce or dark oak wood he used pale wood so hes basically like...white washing himself??? in minecraft??? in a death game??? i mean okay u do u i guess???

and yeah thats that and i havent even touched on ep 2 yet but ep 2 is also. well gempearl divorce arc if i say the least

[kiwikipedia]

Li Shuwen is so much actually. He’s in his ‘heyday of youth’ which is 0% helpful. He’s a theater nerd. He might’ve chewed on rocks in his spare time. He was sold to an opera group as a child. He might’ve actually run away. He’s 70 years old. He appeared in a Grail War 10 years after he died. No one could beat him in a fight so they killed him by poison. He basically had a severed arm collection during the Mooncell War. His Gail Wish is to fight himself. A ton of his voice lines point to him being a masochist. He was once kept like an indoor cat by the First Emperor of China. Julius B. Harwey thinks he’s weird because he enjoys fighting to the death and killing. He is 160 years old. He’ll correct someone who calls him an assassin by saying he’s a professional killer. He complains about saving his allies. He showed up in America just to fight Scáthach. He betrayed Nero and Hakuno just for fun. He’s ridiculous levels of Just Some Guy. He’s the definition of a mean bisexual. He’s so self deprecating yet so confident. He has Childhood trauma from theatre resulting in a bad leg. He thinks Julius B. Harwey is weird for not feeling anything when he kills. He was uninvited to all martial arts events because he kept killing people. He and Beowulf had the gayest interaction in America. His wardrobe is incomprehensible. He claims he can’t deal with kids. He was a teacher. One of his greetings is telling Hakuno not to worry why he smells like blood. He’s the oldest “lily” we have. His Noble Phantasm, No Second Strike, hits three times. It also only hits once. Sometimes it causes an explosion. He offers to assassinate you because a mini Nobu fed and housed him. He once made Elizabeth Bathroy go through an existential crisis. It’s possible he is freaked out by ghosts. He straight up told you he’d kill you if he stuck around with your team in America. It’s implied he gets drunk in the afternoon.

For a man who gets very little traction in GO now days he sure is a lot.

[jellybeanium124]

ok hear me out I noticed something.

Izzy's opinion on Stede changes quite drastically between episode 2 and 3. When he first meets Stede and Stede's like "I believe we have dibs on those men!" Izzy is smiling slightly.

He's got a little upward quirk breaking through his expressions. He's enjoying himself! Stede is weird and new and entertaining, and as of this moment he has no reason not to go theater kid v. theater kid and just have fun with Stede about it. Stede is also definitely having fun too!

Things change slightly when Stede gets his knife to Izzy's face.

Izzy goes into Serious Mode here, not knowing yet that this isn't a situation where Stede would go into Serious Mode. I don't think Izzy thinks Stede'll kill him, probably, but everyone is saying he's insane.

But then, at the end, after Stede's knife is away from his face and nobody dies, his smug little smile returns.

At the very end of the episode he is staring so blankly at the Revenge for a long time. I just think that's funny.

Literally 0 thoughts running around his skull rn lmao

Anyways, in episode 3, Izzy goes from finding Stede mildly entertaining, to disliking him.

Their interaction starts off with Izzy being a dramatic theater kid again, but he's a bit more riled up because he hates Spanish Jackie's (and for another reason I explain later). Stede goes: "ugh, you again!" because he's busy being onto the next thing. Stede generally is super mad at Izzy and frankly it's kind of out of nowhere. Guess he's pissed off about the nose juice or his second white outfit being destroyed? There's still an element of playfulness there around Stede mentioning the hostage and a little bit of that two-theater-kids-playing energy. But, in the end, they hate each other more after this second interaction. Izzy doesn't like being called names (compared to the ~relative~ respect he got in their first encounter) and Stede refusing to see Ed is disrespectful in his eyes.

Now for the million dollar question: why? What made Stede go from entertaining to obnoxious in Izzy's mind?

I'm not 100% sure, but I'd wager a guess that it's Ed. Izzy finds Stede entertaining and reports back his encounter (probably definitely edited a bit to put him in a better light) and now Ed finds Stede interesting. And Izzy knows that's a battle he can't win. I don't think Izzy is interested in the same way that Ed is (Ed has a crush), I think Izzy wants a homoerotic rivalry he doesn't realize is homoerotic.

And he does get it to some degree. The "Muse Why Have You Forsaken Me" scene is some of the gayest theater kid shit I've ever seen. But in the end Stede doesn't care about Izzy, doesn't see him as a nemesis. Izzy is very personally invested in hating Stede, and he's pissed off that Stede doesn't have the same level of investment in being enemies. Because of Ed. Because Stede is way more interested in Ed. Izzy and Stede can't have their own thing without him. Once again, Izzy's angry that Stede isn't conforming to the way he thinks they should be. Nemeses are deeply personal, and Stede doesn't care.

So, in the end, It's ✨jealously✨ babey

[msweebyness]

Theater Kids At Pride

And here it is! The last part of the saga! Enjoy, the theater kids are ready for Pride! @artzychic27 @imsparky2002

Recess

Science

Akuma

Missy: The ACE Shark Warrior🦈

She/Her, AroAce

Proudly showing off her shark teeth to the world, uses them to freak out protestors

Cosplays as Sharkboy and has learned the entire “Dream Dance”

Shark buddies with Austin Q, and they geek out together

Takes the time to patch up people who get hurt dealing with protestors. She has bandages and wraps in the colors of various Pride Flags

Everyone calls her “The Battle Nurse”

She’s beaten up too many attempted drink-druggers to count, she can see the signs from a mile away

Wears her ACE flag around her head like a bandana

Has led ‘raids’ on protestor groups

Jesse: Protect The Baby at All Costs!👶🏽

He/Him, Bisexual

This precious shy boy comes out of his shell during Pride, and it’s glorious

He lets Eri do his makeup and he looks absolutely gorgeous, has everybody simping. He always paints Bi Flag Hearts on his cheeks

Is Adrien’s brother in constantly getting distracted by things and wandering off. It sends the other 2/3 of the Broadway Baby Trio into a panic every time

Mylene: HE WAS JUST NEXT TO ME! WHERE THE HELL DID HE GO?!/Jean: I TOLD YOU NOT TO LOOK AWAY FROM HIM AROUND THE SPARKLY STUFF! HE HAS NO IMPULSE CONTROL!

Will get up on stage and belt a Broadway tune on a moment’s notice. People are shook by how powerful this boy’s voice is

Will occasionally cosplay as his favorite characters, he stunned everyone with an amazing Fizzarolli cosplay. (He even sang 2 Minutes Notice!)

Can occasionally convince Anthony to sing with him, and it’s amazing

Ayesha: The Pansexual Sunbeam☀️

She/Her, Pansexual

Dresses like a walking Pan flag, Marinette made her a bedazzled cape

She carries around WAY too much glitter, she becomes a walking disco ball

Her anthems are “The Smile Song” and “Raining Sunshine”

Endless hugs for the kids who had to sneak out of their houses, she’s adopted 12 at this point

Always leaves the parade with at least three dates lined up, people just can’t resist her

Eating ALL the Skittles. They’re the gayest candy.

Makes Chibi animatics of all her friends at Pride, they’re adorable

Everybody is hot, so she’s constantly simping

Dot: I Made the Schedule, and We Will (Maybe) Follow It!⏱️

She/Her, Demiromantic Bisexual

Wears a Bisexual pin on her lapel, and ties her hair back with a demiromantic flag. She keeps it professional

This girl can rock a brightly colored pantsuit

Promoted to parent friend since Candace and Soo-Yeon are off duty. Everyone has their GPS on!

This close to buying one of those rope-handhold chains for kindergartners

Unintentionally making all the girls simp because she’s so tall and gorgeous

Has bags full of healthy snacks that she knows each of her classmates like. They still need to keep up their nutrition

Somehow knows what everyone is up to and keeps them from getting in trouble

Petra: Let’s Paint The Town Gay🎨

She/They, Demigirl, Aromantic Pansexual

How can one human being wear so many colors?

Does a caricature booth every year, and is insanely popular

Occasionally helps Nath at his facepainting booth

Gives out rainbow bead necklaces and bracelets because they have an endless supply

Has been going to Pride with her dads since birth, and fell in love with it

Paints Pride murals for various businesses throughout the month

Will throw glitter paint at protesters if they won’t shut up

Is an absolutely amazing wingwoman and can get you a date in minutes

Anais: The Mad ScientACE🧪

She/They/It, Demigirlflux, AroAce

Makes smoke bombs that explode in the colors of different Pride flags

Hair died in AroAce colors, sticking out in all directions

Cosplays as Mad Scientists from various forms of media, especially anime. Dr. Franken Stein was a favorite!

Goes completely nuts, this is the one time of the year they don’t burden themselves with what her mom thinks

Supplies all the energy drinks, no one knows where it found ones with THAT much caffeine

Will go full LGBTQIA scientist on any ignorant protesters who are stupid enough to approach her

Roxie: The Asskicking Theyby We Should All Fear👊🏼

They/Them, Pansexual

Has knuckledusters in the colors of the pansexual and nonbinary flags and is not afraid to use them

Gets into fistfights with violent protesters daily, and sends them running away with their asses thoroughly kicked

Gets so flustered whenever someone flirts with them, because why does this happen so often?

Has too many shirts that threaten TERFs to count. Some people say they can turn one to stone with a glare

Can and will benchpress anything

Once vandalized a protester’s car after they tried to assault a trans boy, nobody ever figured out it was them

Has been adopted by the Dykes on Bikes

Anthony: The Shadow of Gayness🌑

He/Him, Gay, Demon of the shadows

Scaring the everloving shit out of protesters with a single stare

Still decked out in black, but he’ll add a rainbow scarf, and some colorful makeup

Simps so hard over his boyfriend singing

Will deck anyone who looks at Jesse the wrong way

When protesters accuse him of being a ‘Satanist’, he responds “Yes, and?”

Will carry his boyfriend at any opportunity

His anthem is anything Evanescence

Writes super morbid and gay poetry, the goth drag queens have claimed him as their own

Eri: The Witch You Could Not Burn🔥

She/Her Polyromantic Pansexual, Witch

Decked out in a full gothic ballgown accented by Pan flags wherever possible, including a full on velvet cloak of one

Does the class’ makeup, and everyone absolutely slays

Reenacts famous scenes from gothic theater, the Drag Queens adore this girl

Has called down hexes on protesters, who swore they actually heard thunder…and some of their houseplants died

Fog also appears around her out of nowhere, as do cats. She might actually be a witch

Adopting all the lil goth pride kids, she has an army now

Every once in a while, she’ll pull a Shining twins act with Anthony to scare some people

Knows any and all Hex Girls songs by heart and will sing them if she so pleases

She’s cosplayed as each member

Candace: Mom-Friend off Duty, return all kids to Dad-Friend📣

She/Her, Heteroromantic Asexual

The one time of the year she’s not the responsible one, and she’s making it everyone’s problem.

Has pompoms, hair ribbons, and face paint in the ACE flag colors.

Death drops and round-offs are ✨flawless✨

Brings a megaphone and makes up cheers to taunt protesters

Candace: 2, 4, 6, 8, only pricks and douchebags hate! 4, 3, 2, 1! Your wife is here, she’s having fun! GOOOOO, fuck yourselves!

The Drag Queens have unofficially adopted her

She will buy you a binder no matter the cost. She’ll buy anything within reason for you, really.

Eats WAY too much cake and drinks WAY too much soda

Soo-Yeon: Nope, Dad on break, too. Kids, go find the babysitter!🏀

He/Him, Biromantic Asexual

Proudly wearing a Jason Collins jersey, signed by the man himself

Victoria is willing to pay him for just the opportunity to touch it

Has a basketball in ACE flag colors, and has a TikTok account of him doing trick shots

He has over 3k followers

Drinking all the OJ, he loves that shit

Looming ominously over protesters

Will carry you on his shoulders so you can see the floats

Has cussed out a TERF in furious Korean, and thrown a perfectly aimed basketball at their head

Margo: There’s Enough Love for Everybody!💞

She/Her, Lesbian, Polyamorous

WILL wear her lesbian flag sweater no matter how hot it is

Passes out hand-knitted scarves in the colors of various Pride flags

Can hold multiple people on her shoulders at once, Reshma and Lacey both simp

Part of the Disney Princess Cosplay Squad, she blew everyone away with Elsa

Can throw a protester out the club while never losing the same happy smile

Has a DIY crafts channel where she makes Pride accessories, she has over 5k followers.

Gives possibly the warmest hugs in the entire world, open to anyone who asks

Staci: The Sane One…Until Caffeine😈

She/Her, Trans Girl, AroAce

Relatively calm and stable…until she downs about four of Anais’ energy drinks

She becomes Ismael’s sister in the Trans forces of chaos

She sneaks onto at least five floats, and pelts protesters with water balloons from a high vantage point

An absolute menace in the glitter wars, no one is safe

Has stolen TERFs’ car keys and will do it again if she feels like it

Hugging all the trans kids that had to sneak out. She’s TP’d a few homophobic parents’ houses

Parker: Troops, We March At Dawn!🪖

She/Her, Demiromantic and Demisexual

Whipping out all her self-defense and combat training on unruly protesters. She is now universally feared

Demi Flag colored camo all day every day

Brings her three massive dogs, Chief, Sarge and Boone, with Pride flag camo bandanas, and everyone fusses over them

No one on the planet can beat her in a push-up contest. No one

Teaches self defense to the kids at Pride. Everyone should know how to fight back

Mini glitter grenades. Don’t ask where she got them

Brecken: The Queerest Cowboy in the West🤠

He/Him, Bisexual

Making an impossible number of people simp with his accent

His cowboy hat is the colors of the bisexual flag, as are his cowboy boots and oversized belt buckle

Has lassoed some asshole protestors before and will do it again

Also has everybody simping over his muscles, he tears his sleeves every year

Will carry (or benchpress) anyone if they ask

Simping so hard over his GF, tells anyone and everyone he’s dating her

Has done drag, absolutely slayed

Has also been coming to Pride since birth, with his moms

Nearly died of happiness when someone brought a mechanical bull

Hugs for everybody, all you need to do is ask

Aggie: Lesbian William Wallace⚔️

She/Her, Sword/any weapon really Lesbian

Aggie: They may take my life…BUT THEY WILL NEVER TAKE MY LOVE FOR WOMEN!

Paints her face Highland Warrior style with the colors of the lesbian flag

Cusses out protestors in Gaelic and chases them with her club (Don’t ask where she got an actual club)

Wowing crowds and making people simp with skateboard stunts that defy the laws of physics

Gets into a parkour competition with at least four other people

Once brought a picture of her uncle and brought home at least twelve new numbers for him. It’s actually how Rohan met his boyfriend.

Also making people simp with her accent

Merida is her queen and you know she’s done the cosplay, complete with a giant stuffed bear

Simps every time a tall and pretty girl walks by

Mona: The Knight Who Says “Gaaaay!”🛡️

She/They, Demigirl, Pansexual

Lets her closet medieval obsession come out full force

Comes out in a full suit of armor with a Pan flag cape, and chases protestors in their wheelchair with a lance

Dropping Monty Python quotes left and right

Makes video compilations of all her friends at Pride every year

‘Accidentally’ running over TERF’s feet with her wheels

Thinks it’s the cutest when little kids ask them questions about the chair

Constantly getting lost because she zoned out or was busy daydreaming

Cosplaying as gay movie icons

Evie: The Bisexual Siren We All Want but Can’t Have🎤

She/Her, Bisexual

Belting out gay power ballads with the voice of an angel and the confidence of Lady Gaga

People seriously cry when this girl sings and she’s been offered and asked to do countless gigs and shows

Every year she wears a bejeweled Jalisco dress in the colors of the Bi flag, of course with a matching parasol, which she uses to fend off protestors

When she’s not slapping them with her gloves

No one messes with her man. If anyone tries to hit on Brecken, she will walk right up and kiss him. And won’t stop until they leave

Cusses out protesters in the calmest but most vicious Spanish ever, never once losing her composure no matter how pissed she is

Can flamenco in six inch heels, like an absolute queen

Turning people down left and right, but really nice about it…provided they’re respectful

Eloise: It All Adds Up to Queer🧮

She/Her, Biromantic Asexual

Whipping out statistics on idiot protesters like it’s no one’s business

Gets into a fierce Just Dance competition every year, and always wins

Cosplays as video game characters, especially anything from Kingdom Hearts

Usually has a bag full of gaming consoles, in case she gets overwhelmed

Always wearing a shirt with an LGBTQIA math pun, she owns more than she probably should

Is shockingly savage with people who get on her nerves

Makes sure her friends don’t go over budget

BONUS!!! Ondine: Your Buff Bisexual Mermaid Dream Come True🧜🏼‍♀️

She/Her, Bisexual

Winner of too many muscle flexing competitions to count

Woe to anyone who tries to arm wrestle this girl

Constantly making girls swoon by lifting heavy stuff

Will carry anyone if it looks like they’re tired

Slaying on the arms of her boyfriend and Queer Platonic Partner. (She and Kim take turns carrying Max bridal style)

Once cosplayed as Ariel, and six people fainted

The Cult of the Buff Mermaid Goddess may or may not exist

If any protester tries to touch her, they get thrown across the road

Has an amazing voice, and will belt out a Disney song if she so chooses

People would die just to be hugged by her

Hope you enjoyed the wonderful gayness! Leave your thoughts in the comments and reblogs!

[theholidayslingerlikebadperfume]

i really missed the boat on being a theater kid frankly i would have been the gayest straight theater kids ever

[wack-ashimself]

Yesterday I saw a wide variety of what, I assume, were gay couples. Men to women alike. A lot of super young ones too. Like teens. And it made me so happy and proud. Cuz I'm old enough to remember when gay people were still shamed and in the closet. I even remember a couple of guys I went to high school with that were gay, but kind of tight-lipped about it. I even got hit on by one. Cuz he thought I was gay. I still remember cuz I think this is one of the funniest stories. He (btw, barely knew the kid. He was not in my grade) comes up during lunch and asks me out. I tell him no thank you, I'm straight, and I got a girlfriend. He kind of scoffs (seriously!) and says no you don't. I don't believe you. So I literally drag him over to where my girlfriend was sitting, I say hey Candace will you tell him that you're my girlfriend, and she goes yeah I'm his girlfriend. And I felt bad because he walked away with his head down, and a little ashamed. And I was thinking like dude that took a lot of guts. It just didn't seem that you did your proper research LOL oh and my first kiss from a girl was to prove to her friends that I wasn't gay. So my reputation most of my high school career was being the gayest straight guy there LOL Even one of my close friend's mom at the time thought I was gay for him. Never once. Which only bugs me for one reason. I was definitely not the most eccentric theater person in high school. So what did I do so gay? That's always confused me. Maybe it's the way I walk? Huh. Cuz I know it's not my voice.. maybe cuz I'm so welcoming? Fuck if I know. But next gay guy i see, I'm gonna ask what they think is gay about me... but that may be misleading lol...

[bllsbailey]

What Ever Happened to the Gay Activists Accused of Abusing Their Adopted Kids? We Have All the Answers.

WARNING: This article contains graphic descriptions of child sexual abuse. Reader discretion is advised.

Remember the self-avowed LGBTQ+ activists accused of sexually abusing their adopted sons? Long after the mainstream media dropped the shocking story, refusing to touch it with a ten-foot pole, Townhall has been the only outlet closely covering the Zulock case hearing-by-hearing, never missing a motion or a court filing.

To recap, William Dale Zulock and Zachary Jacoby Zulock, frequent faces at the Atlanta Pride Parade, are accused of forming a child-prostitution ring in the Atlanta suburbs. The couple was arrested overnight on July 27, 2022, allegedly in the midst of amassing pedophile members, whom they met off of the gay hook-up app Grindr and to whom they would pimp out their elementary-aged children.

Among the slew of child sex crimes they're facing, the Zulocks are charged with producing and distributing "homemade" child pornography with the two boys they had adopted locally through a Christian special-needs adoption agency, All God's Children, Inc. The now-defunct business prioritized placing children who have "waited the longest" for a family. Many of the kids already came from broken homes. Others were either older or part of a sibling pair bonded together. Some suffered from physical, mental, or behavioral challenges. In 2018, the same-sex newlyweds apparently passed the "faster than expected" adoption process "with flying colors," despite the fact that one of the adoptive fathers was previously accused of raping a young boy in another child rape case from years ago. Within months of the children moving in with the alleged child predators, Georgia's courts made the "forever family" official in early November of that year.

The biological brothers, reportedly born to heroin addicts, were only ages 6 and 8 when the years-long sexual abuse allegedly started in late 2019. According to court documents obtained by Townhall, the children were "routinely" raped "at least once a week." Per the probable cause affidavit, William and Zachary confessed to anally penetrating both boys, forcing the two children to perform oral sex, and doing the same to them. The men acknowledged that the boys would cry out that it hurt when they were being abused, but they'd walk them through "how to handle the pain."

The older child, who sustained physical injuries from being brutally raped, told police that Zachary, the cameraman, would be in bed recording when William was abusing him. "I'm going to f**k my son tonight," Zachary allegedly bragged to potential clients, instructing them to "Stand by." He'd send unsolicited messages describing "what he would do to his son," the Walton County Sheriff's Office says.

Authorities were ultimately tipped off by a Snapchat video Zachary allegedly filmed at home in one of the bathrooms. The pornographic clip depicted "an adult male penis was repeatedly being put in the mouth of a prepubescent male." A ball gag, a blindfold, and bindings were visible in the video, says the search warrant executed on the Zulock house, the so-called "Gayest Place in Town," according to a welcome mat that adorned the front entryway. Jurassic Park footy pajamas found in the child's bedroom and a DVR set taken from the in-home "theater room" were on the laundry list of items seized and stored away as evidence.

"Our business is our business. What happens in our home, stays in our home," the men allegedly told the boys. The children said that they were threatened each time they left the house and directed not to tell anyone about the sexual abuse or "there would be consequences."

In a midnight search-and-rescue mission the morning of July 28, 2022, an armed SWAT team descended on the property, tackling Zachary to the foyer floor and busting William butt-naked in bed, as the couple recounted in recorded jailhouse tapes shared with Townhall. Both boys are back in foster care.

If convicted, the couple faces multiple life sentences. Though there's been much talk about a trial since the summer 2022 arrests, the Zulock case has seemingly ground to a halt, except for some status conferences that have been few and far between.

Here's what we know so far:

Judge Jeffrey L. Foster, who's presiding over the proceedings, is eyeing the end of August to set a tentative trial date. 

The next hearing, another status conference after several sprinkled sparingly over many months, is slated for Wednesday, June 26.

"We will be six weeks out from about the ballpark time of the end of August—when I am looking at a trial calendar," Foster said.

At a March 20 status conference, Foster mentioned scheduling the June hearing in order to navigate setting up a special session for the Zulock case. "I'm plotting—I mean planning now," Foster said.

The purpose of this previous proceeding was to decide what to do with the defense's special demurrer.

A special demurrer, a.k.a. a motion for more definitive dates, challenges the charges by asking for additional details or specificity, such as specific dates of when the crimes were committed.

Currently, each charge against the Zulocks alleges an "expansive" date range of when the sexual abuse took place; therefore, that's too "broad" and "practically impossible" to prepare a defense, including raising an alibi, the Zulocks are arguing in an effort to toss out the 17-count indictment brought by a Georgia grand jury.

The charges are as follows:

Count 1: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Performed oral sex on D.Z.

Count 2: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Forced D.Z. to perform oral sex

Count 3: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Anally raped D.Z.

Count 4: Incest (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Sodomized D.Z., son by adoption

Count 5: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 14, 2022)

Accusation: Performed oral sex on J.Z.

Count 6: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 14, 2022)

Accusation: Forced J.Z. to perform oral sex

Count 7: Aggravated sodomy (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 14, 2022)

Accusation: Anally raped J.Z.

Count 8: Aggravated child molestation (Dec. 15, 2021 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Anal rape resulting in the injury of J.Z.

Count 9: Aggravated child molestation (Dec. 15, 2021 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Oral sodomy of J.Z. as to Count 6

Count 10: Aggravated child molestation (Dec. 15, 2021 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Oral sodomy of J.Z. as to Count 5

Count 11: Incest (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Sodomized J.Z., son by adoption

Count 12: Sexual exploitation of children (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Sexually exploited D.Z. for the purpose of producing CSAM

Count 13: Sexual exploitation of children (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Sexually exploited J.Z. for the purpose of producing CSAM

Count 14: Sexual exploitation of children (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022) 

Accusation: Produced, possessed, and distributed child pornography depicting the sexual abuse of D.Z. 

Count 15: Sexual exploitation of children (Dec. 1, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Produced, possessed, and distributed child pornography depicting the sexual abuse of J.Z.

Count 16: Pandering for person under 18 (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Prostituted J.Z. to co-conspirator Hunter Clayton Lawless

Count 17: Pandering for person under 18 (Dec. 30, 2019 – July 28, 2022)

Accusation: Prostituted J.Z. to co-conspirator Luis Vizcarro-Sanchez

As explained by Brody Law Firm, a boutique Atlanta-area criminal defense firm specializing in sex offense allegations, when "the accusers" are children, kids tend to have difficulty recalling dates or pinpointing time periods, especially if the victims are in the earlier stages of development. For example, a child may say that the sexual abuse happened "when I was in 2nd grade." The local law firm advises that the special demurrer is an "indispensable tool" to defend against accusations involving young children.

While Georgia law does allow for the prosecution to allege that the crime occurred between two dates, the timespan must be narrowed down as much as possible. If the evidence shows that the state did not do so (i.e. failing to sufficiently particularize the dates), then the indictment could be successfully dismissed by a special demurrer. The defendant would subsequently be entitled to an evidentiary hearing requiring the prosecution to prove that it cannot narrow down dates.

The government can re-indict the case, though, if the indictment is quashed by the court. However, this could afford the defense an opportunity to demonstrate the case's weakness, ultimately leading to a dismissal of the charges. In the event that the case is indicted again, and the second indictment is found defective, the government is barred from further prosecution of the defendant, per state statute.

The indictment, as it is, is sufficient statutory language-wise and explains exactly what the sexually abusive acts were, Foster ruled. "It doesn't just say an act of sodomy. It specifies whose mouth or whose rectum, whose sexual organs."

At this time, they were discussing whether or not to seek a re-indictment of the criminal charges with more counts added on after the defense's request for specific dates sparked a forensic investigation into the surveillance system that the Zulocks had installed in the interior of their home.

A formidable four terabytes of data, which investigators are continuing to comb through, was extracted from the 16 security cameras stationed all over the house in every single room. The cameras were recording 24 hours a day, seven days a week, capturing everything, including the sexual assaults. "They are all on video filmed throughout multiple rooms in the house," the prosecution says.

So, the prosecution can now specify "hundreds of allegations," matching the metadata to timeframes, as the defense unwittingly welcomed.

As of March, the prosecution was waiting on an official report from the Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI)'s crime lab, where the forensic examination is underway, but had only received a four-paragraph summary of the GBI's findings.

On May 20, the prosecution provided the defense with the GBI Cyber Crime Center (GC3)'s 18-page investigative report detailing some of what was discovered in that extraction.

In court, the prosecution indicated that these are individual write-ups and that further reports are forthcoming spanning "hundreds of pages."

Astounded by the volume of data, William's defense attorney John E. Haldi said, "I had to look up terabytes on Google. One terabyte is, depending on the quality of the video, roughly the length of anywhere between 100 to 150 two-hour movies at the movie theater." In accordance, Haldi asked that the GBI provide some assistance with cross-referencing dates to timestamps of the security footage to help mount his defense.

"They aren't obligated to do that," Assistant DA Lacey Majors of the Walton County District Attorney's Office countered. To which, Haldi responded, "Then I need months to review it."

The dispute prompted a fed-up Foster to interject.

"Here's what's going to happen. We are going to trial in August. So either you are going to trial on a new indictment that has, as I understand it, hundreds of counts, because now that they can specify dates and timestamps, they will re-indict [...] or do you want time to process that evidence and specifically focus on the smaller 17-count indictment that is pending now," Foster told Haldi.

Majors clarified that the charges, as they stand, stem from child pornographic photographs and videos—taken primarily on Zachary's iPhone—that are presently in the DA's possession. A folder, labeled "US," was allegedly found on Zachary's cell phone containing videos of William sexually abusing their one son.

"Those things have been available for inspection two years..." Foster added. "I think we are right at two years from the actual arrest."

Turning it on the other party, Haldi said that throughout the two-year wait, the prosecution has not been able to provide exact dates.

"It has taken them [the investigators] that long because your client saved that much data," Majors fired back.

Foster reiterated to Haldi that the GBI only conducted its labor-intensive, months-long analysis because he requested that the state be specific in its charging instrument. Accordingly, the state is then inclined to charge each instance of sexual abuse as investigators find them in the footage, Foster explained.

As they await the GBI's reports, Haldi was instructed that the digital material can only be seen in a secured location on-site.

Incensed by the stringent stipulations, an aggravated Haldi said, "I have to do it in their offices on their schedule," harping on how reviewing the exorbitant quantity of evidence could take up a significant amount of his time.

"Well, that is the law," Majors stated matter-of-factly.

"When the law is contrary to my client's interests, I have to stand up for that," Haldi replied.

"We can't create and copy child pornography for you," Majors said.

Pivoting, she said, "Mr. Haldi, we have evidence that you have never asked to come see."

"That's not true," Haldi rebutted. "I have been to your office several times. I have never asked to come see it? Good gravy!"

Foster, weighing in, asked Haldi if he actually inspected the evidence himself.

"Three times, judge," Haldi answered immediately. He recounted sifting through a three-ring binder containing still images and delving into the contents of a number of thumb drives. "I have got to make sense of it myself again in your office at your disposal," Haldi griped.

Foster said that Haldi did not have to announce whatever his plans are that very day—that is, his decision to continue with the demurrer or not.

"If we are going forward on a demurrer in this case [...] we will indict..." Majors declared. "There will only be more counts, not less. I can say that," Majors said.

"Your Honor, I'm getting these implicit threats: 'Hey, if you look at the evidence, we're gonna charge your client with more. We're gonna try to send him to jail for 100 life sentences instead of 20' [...] In all my years at the bar, I have never been presented with that dilemma [...] I have never had the state say, 'I have hundreds and hundreds of hours of evidence. Good luck finding it.' I have never had that," Haldi said.

Foster said in his 17 years of criminal defense, he never had a prosecutor hand him "a handwritten map." In the past, he's been given a file or a data dump or a printout "that thick," Foster said, gesturing with his hands. "It is a pain," he conceded, adding that he used to have to drive to GBI's headquarters in Augusta.

Again, Haldi asked that "benchmarks" be highlighted in the GBI's reports so that he can efficiently examine the evidence. "I am happy to comply with that. But if they dump the equivalent of 600 full-length movies on me and say, 'Figure it out yourself,' you can bet I'm going to object to that."

This week, we will see where the case stands and how much of the evidence Haldi has been able to "plow through," as Foster phrased it. The Alcovy Judicial Circuit judge told Haldi he can submit a waiver in writing, if he does decide to drop the demurrer.

Haldi had appeared via video conference instead of in person. The case's slow-walking can be blamed, in part, on Haldi's prolonged leave of absence lasting from August through November 2023, which he had designated on the court calendar for physical therapy and rehabilitation. Last year, Haldi fell and broke his hip, rendering him immobile and unable to drive anywhere, including to the Walton County courthouse.

As Zachary was transported out of the holding room by the bailiff and William was ushered in, Foster bantered with Haldi for a bit about his recovery. "You'll hear the metal detector when I finally do make it to court," Haldi joked. Piling on, Foster mentioned how he has a pacemaker and oft-experiences trouble going through security at the airport.

"I've been groped in every airport and courthouse in Georgia," Foster joked offhandedly at the March hearing in the sprawling child sexual abuse case.

Majors laughed, observing that the court stenographer didn't transcribe that tidbit. "You didn't take down that he's been groped in airports?" she asked. "Really, I've been groped in more courthouses than I have in airports," Foster continued.

Although Haldi's "slightly more mobile" now, propped up haphazardly by a walker-and-cane combo, his lack of mobility, coupled with cardiac issues, is still interfering with his work defending William.

"Mr. Haldi, let's be realistic. Because of the nature of the information you got to review," Foster worded it euphemistically, "your mobility is currently hindering your ability to get out here. I am certainly not insensitive. In fact, I am rather sympathetic to that." Previously, the judge joked about Haldi and him crossing paths at Emory's electrophysiology clinic.

In the interim, Foster instructed Haldi to keep the court "in the loop" between then and when they reconvene Wednesday.

For half a year, Haldi was unreachable; even his client couldn't get ahold of him. "We are just not sure if he is even representing, Mr. [William] Zulock," the prosecution said around Christmastime. At a December 20 status conference, after his leave of absence elapsed, the ever-inaccessible Haldi had "not been in communication with anyone," not responding to emails or phone calls from prosecutors. They tried texting him and leaving voicemails to no avail.

William hadn't heard from him either and neither had his parents, who are footing his legal fees. "I think they want to fire him," William, unaware of Haldi's medical incapacitation, told Foster. Saddled with the accruing court costs, William's side of the family has spent at least $50,000 on William's criminal defense.

Haldi's indisposed state has left Foster unwilling to rule on anything substantive without William having proper representation first. "We're not going to let it fall through the cracks," Foster vowed to William.

Also absent from the courtroom was Zachary's court-appointed defense attorney, Reginald L. Winfrey, who just so happens to serve as general counsel for New Birth Missionary Baptist Church, a black megachurch whose senior pastor has publicly spoken out against same-sex marriage and preached that "homosexuality is a sin." Notably, Winfrey also works at his wife's law firm, the Law Office of Earnelle P. Winfrey, who is a deputy district attorney in Fulton County DA Fani Willis's administration, specifically spearheading her Human Trafficking and Internet Child Exploitation Unit.

Prior to the mid-March proceeding, Winfrey informally sent the prosecution team a lengthy text message in a group chat, which Haldi was a part of, indicating he's "not prepared to announce ready for trial" because he also intends to come in and physically review evidence.

Winfrey, who adopted Haldi's motion, has since withdrawn from the special-demurrer request in lieu of an impending wider-ranging indictment.

Back at a May 17, 2023, motion hearing, Foster addressed a flurry of pre-trial filings.

There, Foster granted the station's motion to sever the co-defendants, who were jointly indicted.

Objecting to the severance motion, Winfrey implored that Foster allow them, the Zulocks, to go to trial together. Winfrey cited no legal basis, other than claiming that the alleged child rapists are asking out of concern for the abused boys being re-traumatized.

"My client would prefer not to put the children on the stand twice," Zachary's counsel claimed.

Haldi agreed. "We also have no desire to have the children go through two separate trials, so I parrot what Mr. Winfrey said."

Foster noted that under the child hearsay statute, the defense attorneys may be the ones to control whether the children will have to testify more than once. The kids could also offer testimony on video to "minimize impact," Foster mentioned.

As for spousal privilege, Foster decided it's best deferred until the surveillance footage's metadata is returned.

Foster did permit the prosecution to compel the Zulocks to testify against one another under grants of immunity, which means nothing that they say on the witness stand can be used against them in their own individual trials. Even though they're immunized against self-incrimination, they are still subject to penalties for committing perjury and making false statements.

The prosecution intends to call on William as a witness in Zachary's trial and vice versa, though it's not yet known who will be tried first. Their testimonial statements to police "clearly implicate" the other defendant, the state says.

Haldi, unprompted, questioned the judge: "Would, Your Honor, anticipate recusing yourself in a second trial?"

"No," Foster retorted tersely.

"I simply don't know how you could un-hear some of the things," Haldi ventured further.

"Well, I am not a fact-finder. So, no. I would not recuse myself because I will not be making any findings of guilt or innocence," Foster said, presuming they're not bench trials and the cases go before separate sets of 12-person juries.

To ensure a fair and impartial jury, out of "an abundance of caution," Foster signed a gag order restricting extra-judicial statements following Townhall's publication of the couple's out-of-court commentary. The men had enthusiastically blabbed about the case to a relative, who then captured the confessions in a series of tell-all texts, sent on jail-issued tablets, and phone calls from behind bars.

However, the court order only applies to attorneys and law enforcement officials. It's not a restraint on members of the media or third parties, Foster clarified, as they are protected under the First Amendment.

At issue was also Zachary's string of confessions in police custody and whether he actually invoked his constitutional right to counsel. Winfrey, who filed a motion to suppress his incriminating statements, argued that his admissions were inadmissible.

A portion of Zachary's police interrogation was played in court, around the one-hour mark.

According to the videotape of Zachary's in-custody interview, he said:

"So, I guess I need a lawyer first then."

"I didn't say I am unwilling. I just asked for my lawyer because you mentioned it at the very very beginning."

Foster noted that the Miranda warnings were read beforehand. The issue came down to whether there was a "clear invocation of counsel" after Zachary previously waived the right to legal representation.

DA Randy McGinley cited a Georgia case where the defendant similarly said he "might need a lawyer." Comparing the cases, McGinley argued that Zachary, too, made an ambiguous assertion. Next, the chief prosecutor pointed to a 2019 Georgia Supreme Court opinion and quoted the ruling: "When a Defendant makes an equivocal reference to counsel [...], interviewing officers are not always required to clarify their request but they can." That decision cited a U.S. Supreme Court case, which says, "Of course when a suspect makes an ambiguous or equivocal statement, it would often be good practice for the interviewing officers to clarify whether or not he actually wants an attorney." That was the procedure followed in the Zulock case, McGinley said. The detective asked Zachary follow-up questions for clarity's sake, such as "Do you want to talk to us?" In response, Zachary said he was not "unwilling" to talk.

Since it's a constitutional matter, not a question of state statute, McGinley moved to reciting case law in other jurisdictions beyond Georgia. In a 2022 Illinois case, a defendant was asked whether he wanted to speak to detectives or an attorney. "An attorney, I guess," the defendant said. The court deemed the defendant's statement equivocal. Out of Texas, in a 2016 appeal case, the defendant said, "I guess I'd like a lawyer." The court found that that was equivocal

"Wondering about an attorney is not invoking your right to an attorney and wanting to stop questioning," McGinley argued, urging Foster to find that Zachary's statements were voluntarily made.

Winfrey relied on Wheeler v. State, a 2011 Georgia case involving aggravated sexual battery, cruelty to children, and child molestation. The defendant said, "You know, I'm not trying to be hard to get along with, but the seriousness of my charges and everything, I need to discuss it with a lawyer before I, you know, talk to you." He was convicted at trial and the appellate court affirmed it. The case went all the way to the state's Supreme Court, which reversed it.

"Well, if I recall Wheeler, the context of the statement in Wheeler was not an expression of a willingness or unwillingness but rather that he was not trying to be difficult or hard to get along with," Foster replied.

Rejecting Winfrey's comparison, Foster found the Zulock case akin to Willis v. State. In that case, the state's Supreme Court determined the invocation was not clear and was, at best, equivocal. The detective asked, "Do you want an attorney before you talk to us?" Willis, the defendant, said, "No, I'm saying I don't have any problem answering any questions, but I still do want an attorney." There were these "countervailing things, which is the equivocation," Foster remarked.

Applying it to the Zulock case, Foster said Zachary asked, not stated decisively, "So, I guess I need a lawyer first then?" That was an "equivocal question," Foster ruled, "not an invocation." He was advised by the detective, "That's your choice." They then talked until Zachary said, "I didn't say I am unwilling." Of Zachary's second statement, Foster heard it as, "I just asked about my lawyer because you mentioned it at the very very beginning." Even if he had said, "I just asked for," that implied past tense, Foster said. "He sandwiches it between two statements that he is willing to talk [...] two expressions of a willingness to talk, and the only other reference was a question about 'I guess I need.' This was not a clear, unambiguous invocation of right to counsel."

Foster found that Zachary was advised of his Miranda rights, expressed that he understood them, and that he voluntarily waived them. His statements were equivocal and, "really, more questions," Foster said. Therefore, his admissions are admissible at trial.

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[magicrainbowkitties]

I had this moment a little bit ago when I was watching a YouTuber talking about romance novels and he just casually said, as if he wasn't tearing my brain to shreds as he did:

"Unless you're demisexual, it's entirely possible to be attracted to someone you don't like."

And this concept. Sounds so unbelievably fake to me. I went into all my frequented Discords and asked all my allo friends "Hey uh. Is this true?" And was met with a mixture of philosophical confirmation, distressed confirmation, and my fellow ace-specs in chat being equally bewildered (I surround myself with only the gayest of theater kids and philosophy majors it seems).

To my allo friends, you have to understand: The idea of having sex with or being attracted to someone you don't like is like. Entirely alien to me. The math doesn't math. It's like someone just told me 5x5 is 40, but I've been operating under the assumption that it's 25 my whole life, and now everyone else is like "yeah it's 40" when I ask.

Yes I love me some enemies to lovers, but like. Even then there's an intermediate period where the characters learn to like each other. Or like there's jumbled confusion about love and hate being razor thin lines, yadayada.

But real life? Nah, sounds fake. I now know it isn't. But it *sounds* fake. You feel?

the aro/ace experience of going 'but am i actually aro/ace?' and then seeing an allo and being like 'oh. okay. yeah i am. what the fuck'

[ericssad]

Regarding the gayest cast member poll i KNOOWWWWW in my heart that it's not Assad. Still voted for him bc i am trying to make that happen through the power of manifestation

i get it because in my perfect world he’d be the gay theater kid everyone thinks he is too so maybe if enough people vote him as gayest it’ll happen. court mandated sexuality

[koffeesfancy]

been playing janelle monae’s fine ass entire discog from top to bottom while at work. i love a fruity, funky sci-fi soul moment. she channels prince, rick james, teena marie, and so many others so well. her art is like the gayest, most theater kid shit ever and i am living

[spacerockwriting]

✨ Tag Game Tuesday ✨

Thank you so much for the tag, @juliakayyy

~~~~~~~~~~

name: Comet

age: 32. Ew.

pronouns: He/him

your sun sign, MBTI type, and enneagram type (google them if you’re not sure!): Pieces, INFP

how tall are you? 5’3

what color are your eyes? Green 

the last time you saw a movie in theaters (bonus: what was it?): Barbie, and it was great. I have found myself getting attached to Allan. I wore my Alibi shirt, but my friend went in his gayest Ken outfit (:

favorite dessert: Brownies.

outer space or the ocean? I love both?? But a Comet is literally a spacerock.

you’re in a McDonald’s drive thru, what are you ordering? Some sort of burger, NO KETCHUP, extra pickles. Fries, maybe a coke or orange.

are you good with plants? I am not a plant person. I blame my dad because I was the one having to pick all his vegetables as a child.

would your current self and high school self get along? Maybe? Probably. High school me was a gay emo kid. Current me is about the same. So, yeah.

a food you can’t stand: I hate green beans. I have always hated them.

something you’d do if money were no object: Travel. I want to go so many places. 

the last app you opened on your phone (tumblr doesn’t count!): Insta.

and finally, compliment yourself! Ngl you can actually writ good stuff sometimes.

idk who to tag soooo everyone :)

[violettierre]

Rambliing

It's a queer instinct to seize the moment fr.

Some theater kids were having practice sessions for their play tomorrow in my work place so i ditched my pile of work assignments to join my co-worker (who is their teach) watching them, just me and a few guys, but watching them sent me way back when i was also enrolled in here, even tho i wasn't into theatre (i was and still is too awkward to act) they call us sometimes for joint activities, not necessarily plays, but it was an amazing idea to help put together kids and build on their experiences and capacity. But anywho, what i was saying, when they would call for us to participate they usually had a shortage of male participants for some reason so in these romance plays someone had to take the role of the guy and guess who always steps in to save the day ? ✨me✨, why? For one single reason only. ✨I wanted to flirt with the girls✨ like seriously, what was i supposed to do ? Little me saw an opportunity to be gay shamelessly without judgements and i couldn't just leave it there i always volunteer without hesitation, unless there are cameras involved cuz i didn't want my parents to watch me pretend to kiss em hot girls (they[the teachers] wouldn't allow me to actually kiss them ;_;), and while everyone thought i was serious about my role, i was in fact serious about my gayness, i memorize the lines by heart and then stare deep into their eyes and adding that creepy "je t'adore..." under my breath and while in my head i think of myself as their prince charming, i was acting like a creepy sweaty stalker and i made everyone uncomfortable... the scene is awkward and hillarious when i recall it now, boy was i wild... i've got many stories to tell and remember but that was a funny one, like i said im too awkward on stage either way serious or not, but it wasn't the gayest i've been in my past... trust me.

Oh and i got into an argument with a kid, what a calm day it was.

[ashauyel]

ok sorry sorry i didn’t watch bepler but im incurably curious WHO are the gay ass ones??

I did not watch bepler either I just follow some gay men who were deeply invested in the careers of the gayest trainees they could find which I think admirable. both halves of haobin (Zhang Hao whose name I know because he like won the thing and Hanbin whose surname I do not know), Ricky (look at him), Gyuvin (theater kid), and Jiwoong (BL actor and personal friend of Holland). half the guys in this group I literally do not know the names of but I do know them

[azumasoroshi]

dgs fics are crazy they get me out here grabbing my nonexistent prosecutor's badge and going "guh...!" as i take psychic damage from the beautiful angst people write like brooooo