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missymurphy1985 · 3 years ago

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The Writer (part 10) Final Chapter - Epilogue

Warning - childbirth

Massive thank you goes out to @heidimoreton for your trust and faith with your idea - couldn't have done this without you 💖

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @peakyciills @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @namelesslosers @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @cilleveryone @peaky-cillian @misselsbells06 @datewithgianni @heidimoreton @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch

It had been nearly a full year since that first encounter. Twelve months of pure bliss. Your roommate was married to your brother now, and had a job as Charlie's tutor - Thomas still hadn't allowed him back at the school so Laura had been hired as his home tutor. You'd moved into Arrow House when you discovered there was a mini Shelby on the way.

Flashback

"Y/n, come here..." Polly had been over that morning to help you make plans for Christmas dinner. Your brother and Laura were coming, along with the Shelby family, and you were panicking about the whole thing. You wanted it to be perfect. You entered the kitchen where Polly suddenly grabbed under your left breast, and you instantly pulled away.

"What are you doing?"

"Just stand still will you?"

"Stand still while my boyfriend's aunt gropes me??"

"Yes." You furrowed your brow in confusion but allowed her to continue.

"This isn't awkward at all Polly, wanna tell me what's going on?" Thomas walked in right at that moment, and froze instantly.

"Polly... Polly what are you doing?" He eyed her, but not suspiciously like you did. It was more of a 'knowing' kind of look.

"Well well Thomas.. hardly surprising considering you two can barely keep your hands off each other..." She smirked.

You were totally confused, darting your eyes between them

"Someone wanna enlighten me?"

Tommy looked to the floor, rubbing his eyes, before smiling. A huge grin, followed by a long sigh.

"Remember telling me you didn't have children with Jack because you thought you couldn't have them?" Polly asked and you nodded, still trying to work out what was going on.

"You weren't infertile, y/n." Tommy leaned against the door, his eyes slightly damp as he glanced at your stomach. The penny still hadn't dropped.

"Someone want to tell me what the fuck is going on here?"

Tommy nodded at Polly who left the room, smiling to herself. Tommy pulled you over to him, his hands stroking your arms.

"After Grace died, I vowed never to love again. It felt like I would be cheating on her, disgracing her memory. She didn't need replacing, and I certainly couldn't replace her. When you lost Jack, you felt the same, which is exactly why I think fate brought us together. We discovered there was enough room in our hearts for another love. Now, it seems we need to make room for one more." His right hand took yours, and he placed them both over your stomach gently. The penny dropped, and your mouth hung open in stunned silence.

"I'm... I'm pregnant?"

"You are. Pol?" Polly came back in and threw her arms around you, squealing with delight.

"But I didn't think I could... Jack and I tried for years..."

"You clearly weren't the infertile one, y/n. I'd say you're around six weeks already, you're glowing! That's how I could tell," Polly had tears in her eyes, and you felt your emotions coming to the surface.

"I can just about handle one of you crying, both of you will send me over the edge, knock it off!" Thomas laughed, wiping his eyes on the back of his sleeve making your eyes water more, a choked sob leaving your chest.

He pulled you close, his chin resting on the top of your head as you sobbed with happiness into his shoulder.

"A baby..." You choked.

"Our baby. And now we know you can have them, don't think we're stopping here either," he winked, making you grin. You'd have a football team of Shelby's if you could.

Present Day

You were both lying in bed having a lazy Sunday morning. Tommy's hand drifting over your baby, still tucked warmly inside you but due to make her appearance in the next two weeks. Occasionally she would kick his hand - the clear bump visible making both of you smile.

"She's going to be famous - Polly told me," you grinned, clasping your hand over his, resting it where she'd kicked.

"She's going to be beautiful. Any thoughts on names?"

"Yes. What do you think of Jacqueline Grace?" You asked, nervously. A mix of the two people who'd brought you both together. He looked down at your belly, moving his body down to kiss it lightly, smiling.

"I love it. It's perfect.. thank you.."

You grimaced slightly as a sharp pain shot through your abdomen, you'd had a few over the last few days but put them down to over exertion - you'd refused to rest up like Tommy had ordered, continued the renovation planning of the house.

"You okay?" He asked as you tensed.

"Yes - Ada warned me about this, it's just my body preparing that's all, nothing to worry about." Your hand suddenly tightened on his as another pain gripped you, you sat up and gritted your teeth.

"Shit..." Tommy gasped as a sudden gush of water flooded the sheet underneath you. He looked to you, both of you panicking but smiling through the fear.

"Call Polly - I think your daughter wants to meet us a little earlier than planned!" He kissed you, then shot up and ran down the stairs to the phone in his office.

You stood up, walking round in circles, rubbing your belly as another wave of pain took over. You were doubled up, haunched over a chair when Tommy came back in the room, panting through the pain.

"She's out - Michael's out looking for her... We need to call a doctor -"

"No! I wanted this to be family only Thomas, I don't want doctors fussing or drugs, I can do this without them... Just rub my back, please.." he moved to your side, his hand stroking firmly over your lower back.

"I don't know what to do y/n!"

"You do as I need you to do, then when Polly gets here you can leave if you need to.."

"Not a chance am I letting you go through this alone - I'm staying right here if you'll let me?" You turned to him surprised, but nodded.

"Fuck... Tommy this really hurts..." Another wave of pain. "Take me downstairs, I need water..." He led you slowly down the stairs into the lounge, before fetching you a glass of water. You paced the room, the pressure in your pelvis was excruciating but you tried to remember Ada and Polly's advice as much as possible - breathing slowly, staying calm.

"Thomas where is she?!" You screamed, leaning over the back of the sofa. The contractions were coming quickly and getting more painful. Weren't these things supposed to take hours?? Days even??

"Come lie down, rest - you need to keep your strength up..." He lay you down on the floor, but you quickly realised that wasn't what you wanted. You moved into a kneeling position, your upper body resting against Tommy's chest as he breathed with you through each contraction.

"Tommy, I can feel her pushing down..." You panted. He suddenly took charge - lifting your nightdress up and ripping your panties away from you. Reaching a hand between your legs, he pulled away sharply.

"Then push - she's coming now whether Polly is here or not, I can feel her head - Push!"

You bore down, gripping onto his shoulders for support. The pain was stifling. His hand between your legs, he could feel his baby's head slowly pushing through.

Pulling away from you slightly, he grabbed a cushion from the sofa and placed it between your knees.

One of the maids must have heard the commotion, and she entered the room carrying a bowl of cool water and towels.

"Mr Shelby let me help, I've delivered three sisters..." He nodded, holding your nightdress up by your waist as Clara focussed on the baby.

"Thomas Shelby, you put that cock anywhere near me again and I'll cut it off, you hear me??"

"Shh now you know that's not true.... I've got you, come on... I'll breathe with you, eh?"

"Mrs Shelby you need to pant - do not push until I tell you to, okay?" Clara ordered.

Tommy leaned back, looking directly into your eyes.

"With me... Come on..." You found strength in those blue eyes, as he panted with you. Your eyes watering from the immense pain between your legs. "Stay with me, that's it, I've got you.."

"Heads out, push now Mrs Shelby!"

A scream left you as your body took over.

"How much more Clara?!" Tommy asked, desperate not to see you suffering any more.

"We're nearly there now, one more Mrs Shelby.."

"You hear that? One more and our girl is here. Jacqueline Grace will be here in her Mama's arms, come on baby, you can do this I know you can." You shook your head to protest but again your body defied you.

"Tom... Shit shit shit...." The wave of pain, tied with your exhaustion, was almost too much to bear. You couldn't take anymore, you could see the blood on Tommy's shoulders through his shirt where your nails had dug into him. You rested your head on his chest, focussing on his heart beat as he kissed your head. One scream from you, followed swiftly by a baby's cry from underneath you as you slumped against him, completely exhausted.

A few minutes went by, as Tommy eased you onto the floor between his legs, pulling your nightdress clean off you. You didn't care that Clara saw you completely bare - there wasn't much more she could have seen at that point. Just as you regained your senses, your baby girl was placed on your chest, having been checked and cleaned by your new favourite maid.

"Congratulations Mr and Mrs Shelby, she's perfectly healthy," she smiled, handing her to you. She instinctively searched for your breast, hungrily suckling from you as a wave of pure love took over. You could feel Tommy shuddering slightly underneath you, unashamedly crying as he watched his daughter feed.

"You were so brave.. so strong.. you blew me away y/n, I'm so fucking proud of you..."

Once you'd been cleaned up and moved back upstairs in bed, Polly arrived. She stopped in the doorway in shock, seeing you lying in bed sleepily as your husband swayed back and forth, Jacqueline in his arms dozing.

"Better late than never, eh Pol?" He laughed, handing his daughter to his Aunt. She choked holding the little one close, kissing the top of her head gently.

You tried so hard to stay awake but you could feel your eyelids growing heavy. A small kiss placed on the top of your head sealed the deal.

"Sleep now Mama. You'll need your rest, because I'm putting another one of those in you at the earliest opportunity."

#thomas shelby x smut #thomas shelby x reader #thomas shelby x you #tommy shelby x smut #tommy x fem!reader #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby x pregnant reader #tommy shelby x childbirth #thomas shelby x pregnant reader #thomas shelby x childbirth

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svchengss · 3 years ago

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two halves | l.mh

PAIRING. mark lee x reader

GENRE. fluff, heavy angst

WARNINGS. major character death, grief

WORD COUNT. 2.4k

SUMMARY. right after his death, mark watches how you cope with the loss

A/N. i saw this one tiktok and it kinda inspired me to write this

// just to let you guys know, reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !! thank you for reading :D

white walls, white room.

mark scrunched his face, his eyelashes slowly fluttering open, the dark brown iris adjusting the size of the pupils due to the brightness of the walls reflected upon it. a soft groan vibrating from his throat, he assessed his surroundings where nobody or nothing else is present. he looked down to inspect his clothing, hoping that it would give him any clue of this room or space he’s in - an all white outfit. this scene looks exactly like the one in the movies where the characters realize they are dead. except this time, he really is.

THE REALIZATION.

the muffled sounds of cries and sobs rang through his eardrums, triggering a reflex to wake up from the state that he thought was a slumber. he is lying on the hospital bed with the light blue clothing piece, faint light illuminating the space where people are huddled up around him. he waved his right hand in the air to let them - who he later remembered as his family members and friends, know that his eyes are already open. nobody moved even the slightest, the atmosphere being very much dead, scent of medicine intoxicating his mind.

then he saw someone who he holds very dear to his heart - you, enter the hospital room, dropping onto her knees as soon as she saw his state of condition. in an instant, he shot up from his lying position and ran over towards the crying you, shoulders shaking and all. bringing his hands to hold you in his embrace, not even a glance spared by you brought a hundred and one questions to him. why didn’t anybody acknowledge him when he woke up? why can’t you feel his touch?

“mark lee. time of death, 10:23 pm,” the tall doctor with glasses rested on the bridge of his nose announced before leaving the room, holding the clipboard close to his chest. mark gauged the monitor screen next to the bed, the line indicating his heartbeat is no longer showing spikes going up and down - instead becoming a flat line, deafening beep present with it. then he sees himself still laying on the white sheets, eyes still closed and no signs of breathing evident. a surge of panic rushed through his veins.

this can’t be real.

mark rushed into the bathroom, a surprised gasp leaving his lips. his body is semi-transparent, the shape of the toilet bowl can be seen through his left shoulder. his body shakes with terror, slapping himself in the cheeks multiple times just to make sure that this whole fiasco is just a nightmare.

oh my god. no, this is real.

mark stood in the back of the crowd, witnessing the funeral of someone and that someone being him. of course, he’s never expected to get the sight of his own service. his mother is standing beside you, her hands rubbing circles onto your back in an attempt to calm your mourning state. you’re still looking ever so pretty, a black chiffon dress on your body with white pearl necklace on your collarbones and your wavy black hair hanging down your shoulders. not that anybody else would notice, it’s someone’s death after all.

“stay strong, y/n. he will always be in our hearts,” the same rhythm of sentence in tones full of pity being directed towards you. mark’s sister enveloped you into a warm hug despite the chilly atmosphere, whispering comforting words into your ears before getting into the family’s car. you’re not going back home, not yet when you still feel reluctant to let him go.

“why did you leave me?” the only coherent words from your hoarse voice can be heard. mark, who is crouching next to you, is holding his tears back. instead, he sends a sorrowful smile - not that you can see him anyway. is there any way to let you know of his presence?

“goodbye, love. i’ll see you tomorrow. i promise,” you dusted the back of your dress from any dirt or debris, leaving a rose on his tombstone. the thing is, he doesn’t want to part from you. and that’s why his figure is seated beside you in the cab. he grazed his thumb on your knuckles, making you feel tingles rushing through. you pushed the slight thought away, you must be tired to be feeling things.

you slowly opened the door to your apartment, you and mark’s to be exact. the whole house is making those memories make their presence in the back of your head again. the kitchen where you two baked cookies for christmas last year. the bedroom where you snuggled upon his chest, not wanting to start your day just yet. the piano where he sang those cheesy songs for you. the living room where you slow danced at 3 in the morning. his favourite mug resting on the countertop, probably will not be used again. this whole situation is too overwhelming for you. you feel weak.

with each day passing by, you didn’t even miss one without a visit to his resting lot. you would tell him stories of how your day went or something that you read which would made him ponder. the words carved on it are already etched onto your brain.

mark lee. a son, a brother and a loving partner.

the clock hanging on the grey wall has it’s arms stretched out to display the time - two in the morning. you can’t sleep just yet, not having any for the past few days even. dark circles are appearing around your eyes, not yet recovered from the puffiness from all the crying. mark’s heart aches everytime he takes upon your state. he feels very guilty, not that death was his choice after all. it’s simply fate, a cycle of life, a destiny that every single creature on this planet will end up with.

you’ve taken the whole month off work, still feeling ever so helpless. in fact, you can’t even remember the last time you’ve stepped out of the apartment, the night before his passing perhaps? you’ve completely shut yourself out from any interactions - deactivating your social media, not accepting any calls. you just need time to heal.

as if you’re being controlled by some type of mastermind, you shoot up on the balls of your feet, pulling away from the couch. those images of you slow dancing with mark, hands in each other’s holds, your chin rested in the crook of his neck and being ever so engrossed in love are coming back more often now. you trudged to the vinyls arranged neatly on the shelf, picking one before placing it on the turntable - frank sinatra, one of his all time favourites.

holding your hands up at about his usual height, you start twirling around. you can almost see the outline of his smile, his features right in front of you. except, he is. he’s been observing your moves the whole night. mirroring your current position, as if you can really see him, it’s a miracle for him. overjoyed actually, he doesn’t realize the salty tears streaming down his cheekbones and so are yours.

“thank you for coming, dear. it’s a pleasure seeing you in what, weeks?” a laugh escaped the woman’s lips. you reciprocated her hug before stepping into the living room. it’s been a long time since you’ve been here, was it in january? mrs. lee had invited you over for a simple dinner, checking up on how you’ve been. you can see that the family is still struggling over his passing, the way his sister’s eyes are not twinkling as usual makes it hard to cover up the lie.

“you see, this was on his high school graduation day. he was very happy that day, doing all sorts of dances and stuff. finally escaping from hell as he said,” she giggled. she’s been displaying all sorts of memoirs to you, photo albums and photographs scattered on the wooden floor. to be honest, you’ve never seen these before. all smiles mark lee, easy to notice among the crowd. not that he’s changed, he’s still that boy now. mark just sat on the couch - his favourite spot, observing the throwback session going on. if he’s still here, his sister for sure is going to tease the hell out of him.

“he told us so much about you, you know? as if everything reminds him of you, that boy is lovestruck. really,” that sudden confession made your tongue dry, unable to find a perfect response. you were really that special to him.

“drive safe honey, you can come over whenever you want. you know you’re always welcome here, right?” mrs. lee handed you the small box filled with some things you’re going to keep. she kissed both of your cheeks, mr. lee standing behind her giving you a small wave. a small smile crept up onto your face before igniting the engine, turning your wheels out of the housing area.

the netflix show is playing on the television, the faint voices of the characters playing in the background. you’re sitting on the floor, flipping through the photo journal you two decorated throughout your one year of relationship. you can see his little scribbles and doodles, often a little dinosaur symbolising your always grumpy personality.

in one photo, a golden birthday hat is nicely placed on your head with him kissing your right cheek. you remember clearly, a surprise party for you last year. in the following ones, they are mostly candid shots - you blowing out the candles while he looks at you full of love, him eating a portion of your dish while you pout your lips. you would say it was the night of your life, spending it with the guy who stole your heart.

the next page of the journal is a shot of mark taking a photo of you in the park. you suppose it was taken by donghyuck? that one picture of you was stuck as his lock screen wallpaper for a while, you remembered getting so embarrassed over it. mark would give you the same excuse every time you questioned him about it, implying that the sight of you would light up his whole day. cheesy really, but that was what remained as memories of the past, tied neatly in your heart.

the rain trickling against your window eventually made you doze off to wonderland, creating the perfect chance for mark to browse through the journal in your hands. carefully lifting it from yours so that you won’t be stirred from your sleep, he settled down in the space beside your sleeping figure. slowly turning the pages, he smiled fondly at each photo holding a thousand moments that can’t be recreated ever again. some of them would make him giggle. he kneeled down slightly to place a soft kiss on your forehead, making you squirm a little due to the faint touch.

“give him a chance. i’m not saying that you should forget mark but it’s been months, you should live up a little,” yerim’s voice sounding concerned from the other end of the line. perhaps she’s right but you just need more time. but how much longer? you’re afraid you yourself have no specific answer for that enquiry.

you’ve been feeling better by now, welcoming people back into your life and carrying out the same daily routine of yours. going to work, buying groceries, going to the drive-thru and whatnot. of course, the void is still obvious - coming back home to an empty atmosphere instead of him waiting for you on the couch, sometimes dozing off, no more weekend cafe runs. but at least you’re trying your best. you bid your goodbyes before tapping the red button, ending the call. plopping the device onto the mattress, you stared at the white ceiling, deep in your own thoughts.

you should give him a chance. live up a little.

yes, you should.

getting hold of the phone and immediately opening the messages app, you searched for jungwoo’s number. he’s been trying to take you out for dinner for a while now. you still remember his exact words, whenever you’re ready he’s always there, waiting for you. you’re not really sure about that particular question but it wouldn't hurt to give it a try, right?

typing in the words ‘okay, sure’ is already a pressure for you but you still proceeded to press the send button. glancing at the clock showing the time, the notification ping redirected your focus onto the screen.

jungwoo: cool, is tomorrow night okay with you? i’ll drive, of course :)

tomorrow night. okay, tomorrow night.

an elegant red gown is wrapping your curves perfectly, a thin necklace with the seashell charm around your neck while your lips is decorated with the dark red tone, highlighting your poise appearance. hearing the doorbell ring, you tidied up the dresser as your eyes landed onto the picture frame holding a photo of you and mark. a sad feeling crept into your heart but you pushed it away, opening the door to reveal jungwoo in a black and white tuxedo.

you would say that the dinner went well, none of his questions or chatters crossing any borderline. he’s just so polite, even you are amused. feeling comfortable with his presence, the small gap in between is eventually closing down since you’ve learned so much about each other during the other few dates. one night completely changed it for you, him offering you a dance at some event he’s bringing you with.

you observed that his moves are slightly similar to mark’s - not completely of course, mark’s is very unique and very…mark-ish. for the first time ever in the recent turn of events, you flashed a genuine smile. one that is not just for show, one that only comes out when you’re truly elated, one that you only manage to give to certain. mark just observed the scene from a distance, admiring how you’ve managed to find the spark of happiness you once lost.

alas, mark saw his other half become full again with another, her eyes twinkling with the same joy but this time, it’s not him in the reflection.

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jaybird-redhood · 3 years ago

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propinquity

wc: 2.2k

pairing: jason todd // gn reader

The first thing you think when you see him for the first time is that he has the cutest smile.

That’s a lie, the first thing you think it that he is so incredibly in shape, and it looks great on him, but the smile thing sounds better in your head.

He's moving into the apartment across from yours a month after you moved into yours. Weird, because the two people in your building closest to your age are 2 and 63, respectively.

You suppose that some wicked twist of fate must’ve brought this upon you for missing your cousin’s birthday party last week, because the guy standing across from you is crazy hot. And looking right at you. And you are in the huge neon Wonder Woman t-shirt that your best friend got for your birthday last year.

Yeah. Karma.

“Nice shirt,” the guy offers, holding in a grin. “You’re really making it work.”

“I-”

“See you around, neighbor.”

And with a shut of a door and an awfully charismatic smirk he’s gone.

The next time you see him is a week later, and this time- luckily, you think- you’re dressed somewhat put together. You run into him while unlocking your door.

"What's got you in a twist?" he asks.

"Um," you start, "I just. Ugh I have so much to do. Like 3 hours of homework, a lecture tomorrow that I cannot skip, and I'm completely out of bread and eggs and can't even you to the store until, like, Thursday at best."

Once you start rambling you can't seem to stop. You slouch against your door. You're not entirely sure why you're telling a stranger all this, but he seems to be listening, so you suppose that’s a good sign

"I get the feeling," he offers, and you look up at him. "I'm majoring in English Lit and my classes are kind of kicking my ass."

You give him a small smile, "Glad to know someone in this building is struggling as much as I am."

"Jason," he says, and he reaches his hand out to you. "My name."

You shake it and tell him yours.

As you both turn back into your respective apartments you think that he maybe isn't as intimidating as you thought.

The next day goes by with a really boring lecture and another 3 hours of work you need to do.

The ride home from uni isn't that long, but it's long enough for you to contemplate all the ways that your life went wrong after moving to Gotham. And, maybe as payback for thinking mean things about the city, rain that you think should belong to a category 3 hurricane starts to whip around your car 10 minutes into your drive.

Your clothes are dripping water in literal puddles by the time you get back to your apartment.

Groaning, you start fishing for your keys in your purse while walking up the last flight of stairs.

When you get to your door you stop. Right in front of it there’s a grocery bag. Picking it up and looking inside you see a loaf of bread and a small carton of milk.

You pick it up smiling.

“Jason?” you ask, knocking on his door.

No response.

You shrug and turn around. Remember to thank him the next time you run into each other; you think.

That next time doesn’t happen to be that long and thank goodness for you.

“You know, we really need to stop meeting like this,” he says to you.

You’re sitting on the floor outside of your door looking rather pathetic, and he’s giving you the most awful smirk you’ve ever seen. (Not that it looks bad on him though. You seem to think that nothing could really look that bad on him)

“I swear I’m usually more put together than this,” you sigh to him. “You moving here jinxed me!”

“Yeah yeah. You’re locked out, aren’t you?”

You give him your best withering I’m going to kill you stare, but it must not be working because he just laughs even harder at you.

“This is completely not my fault it’s just I lost my second set of keys like right when I moved in and then today when I got home, I accidentally left them in my car, but my second set of car keys is in my apartment so now I can’t get them out, stop laughing at me!”

“God you’re a mess,” Jason says- finally finished laughing at you and maybe taking a bit of pity on how disheveled you look. “You couldn’t call anyone to get you in?”

You shake your head.

“My friend is the only other person with a set, but they’re out of town, and our landlord is being a dick and telling me it’s my fault in the first place, so I need to deal with it. I’ve been sitting out here for like an hour.”

“All I’m hearing is that it is your fault and now you’re just moping about it feeling bad about yourself.”

You tilt your head against the door so hard that it makes you wince a bit.

“Ok fine,” he says crossing his arms.

“What?”

“Wait right here.”

He goes into his apartment and comes back out with a skinny metal thing you don’t recognize.

You look at him in confusion and he just motions for you to scoot out of the way as he sticks it in your locks and starts to pick it.

You sigh in relief.

“Thank you thank you thank you. For everything. I swear I will get my life together, so you don’t feel like you have to keep cleaning up my messes.

“I don’t mind,” he says with a small smile, “Take your time.”

And with that he opens the door to your apartment and turns back to his.

“By the way, you should really get better locks. That was way too easy.”

You make a note in your head to get that done sometime. As you’re lying on your couch that night, you’re AirDropped a photo on your phone. Saving it up you see it’s a piece of paper with neat handwriting on it: a phone number and a smiley face, Jason’s name at the bottom.

You smile too and add the number to your contacts.

Over the next few weeks, you and Jason start talking more, both over text and through the various times when you run into each other outside your doors.

Each interaction is better than the next, and you soon start to realize that Jason isn’t just some hot guy with no brains. He’s sweet and charismatic, has a whole wall full of bookshelves, could probably quote any classical novel by heart, has incredibly good taste in music, and best (or worst) of all, would make incredible friend material.

It’s just that as you become closer friends, you start to realize that that might not be all you want.

It’s a stupidly cold Friday morning when he texts you, and you’re covered in blankets and wrapped in sweatshirts in your bed. Movie at my place tonight?

You text back your approval and a quick be there at 6 before getting ready for classes.

The day goes by slower than you hoped.

It might be the anticipation of seeing Jason again, or more likely the hours of lectures you have to sit through, but you’re elated when your final class for the day gets let out.

The hours in between are a blur.

A blur which leads to the two of you sitting on his couch watching Romeo and Juliet together, a blanket thrown over your bodies.

You have the obligatory bowl of popcorn resting on your legs, and every few minutes Jason reaches across your lap to take a handful.

The way you’re laying half on top on him is completely deliberate, as to take as much of his body heat as possible. Your landlord had turned off heating 3 weeks prior to ‘save money’ or some other bullshit.

Jason’s not complaining though.

Once your popcorn bowl is finished and your head is in his lap, he runs his fingers through your hair absentmindedly. It might be the nicest feeling you’ve ever felt.

Throughout the movie you exchange snide comments about the plot back and forth. You start trying to say funny things whenever you can just to hear how sweet his laugh sounds to your ears.

By the end of the movie, you’re only slightly in tears, or so you tell yourself.

“Are you crying right now?” Jason asks incredulously, wearing a teasing smile.

“It’s not my fault,” you half say half moan, “Leonardo DiCaprio just has that effect on me.”

He just laughs and pulls you upright until you’re sitting on his lap.

His eyes are a shade of blue green that you’ve never seen before, although you could swear their getting greener by the second.

You watch his gaze drop down to your lips before staring you right in the eyes again.

“Can I kiss you?”

“God yes,” you tell him, and kiss him right back.

The next week is somewhat uneventful, even though you and Jason had been meeting each other almost every night, rotating apartments based on whose house was warmer each particular night.

Tonight is your night, and you’ve been waiting the whole day to show him the film you had rented to watch together.

The walk up to your door is easier than usual, and you have a bounce in your step that’s making you feel even more elated than normal taking out your keys to unlock your apartment.

You open your door and your bag drops. The keys clatter when they hit the hardwood, and the silence that follows is deafening.

“You’re bleeding on my carpet,” is the first thing that comes out of your mouth.

There Jason is, bleeding quite profusely, and using your kitchen counter to keep himself vertical. He’s wearing what looks to be a torn half of a domino mask and an extremely hot leather jacket.

(Not that this was the time for noticing his fashion choices, but you filed that thought away for later.)

What really catches your eye though is the huge red bat symbol on his chest, and the red helmet next to it sitting on your counter.

He shifts a little to the side before stumbling through saying, “Um, so, I know this isn’t ideal and I’m really sorry to put you in this situation, but I seriously do not feel like bleeding out tonight and-”

“Oh my god this is great,” you cut him off with. “I thought you were a hit-man!”

“Wait what.”

“Shit no that’s not what I meant- kind of, hang on we should probably stop you from dying before having this conversation.”

You walk over to him to get a better look at his wounds.

“God Jace, you look like death warmed over.”

He just stares at you.

“You have a bunch of stuff in your bathroom, right?”

At least this elicits a reaction. He grimaces in pain but gives you a nod of his head in conformation.

“Ok I’ll be right back, don’t move.”

He gives you a look that says seriously, where would I go.

3 minutes later you’re back with a needle and thread, and some sterilizing spray.

“This should be fine,” you tell him, “I took a first aid class last year with my friends and passed with flying colors according to the nurse.”

“Just try to keep them tight and neat. I trust you,” he says, and your heart pounds just a little harder.

You respond with a nervous laugh but take a deep breath and start working.

An hour and a half later you’re done.

The combination of pain meds, bandages, and a whole lot of stitches eventually led to you and Jason laying in your bed together, both completely exhausted.

He turns his head to face you.

“Could we maybe go back to the hit-man thing?”

“Oh uh. Well I saw a bunch of shirts covered in blood in your laundry in the bathroom, not to mention all the weirdly specific first-aid you had,” you tell him.

“And also the assorted guns and knives you have hidden all over. I guess I just assumed? But the whole Red Hood thing is so much better,” you reassure him.

“You found all my knives?”

You smile up at him.

“I love that that’s thing you chose to focus on.”

“And you’re really not mad that I didn’t tell you about the whole vigilante thing before?” he asks.

“Jay, I had already resigned myself to life forever with some shady hit-man that also happened to be incredibly good looking. Red Hood is ten times better than that. I’m not going to run away from you just because you’re incredibly intimidating and probably could kill me. I see that as an added bonus,” you say, with as much charm as you can muster without yawning.

“Just. Be careful, ok? I’d hate to make this a routine.”

He responds by pulling you closer to his body.

“I promise,” he whispers into your head. “You really to remember to get better locks by the way, breaking in was still way too easy.”

You let out a small laugh and finally you let yourself give into sleep.

#luce writes #jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #jason todd x gender neutral reader #red hood x gender neutral reader #jason todd x y/n #red hood x y/n #jason todd x you #red hood x you #jason todd imagine #red hood imagine #dc imagine #jason todd fanfiction #red hood fanfiction #jason todd #red hood #dc

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thasmin13 · 2 years ago

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Here is chapter 2 of my thasmin fanfic, I posted chapter 1 last week or the week before if u want to go and read it first. (this chapter is abit longer mind)

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The Doctor and Yaz entered the TARDIS again, Yaz closing the door behind them. "So, where are we off to?" She asked, not caring that much anymore about being tired, all she cared about at the moment was being with The Doctor. "Well I was thinking...." The blonde said, typing the memorised coorordinated in to the TARDIS. "No name, a symbol though. Closest word to it is, wait running it through the TARDIS's data banks, is unknown paradise." She said looking at the screen.

"Cool." Yaz replied. "Sounds like somewhere we can relax." The Doctor walked down the console room to Yaz. "Yeah." She said quietly. She really wanted to turn around and runaway but knew that she had no choice now and whatever it was that Dan and the TARDIS had planned, she was gonna have to face whether she liked it or not. She took a quiet deep breath as Yaz opened the door.

Dan was right, it was beautiful. From the door, they had the prettiest view of a field of bright green grass and all sorts of colourful flowers which lined it. When Yaz looked up, she saw a big blue sun hanging against the red sky. Bright silver dots where already visible up above. "Looks like a passion planet." The Doctor said before she could stop herself.

She looked round to see Yaz's confussed face. "A rare planet which is only visible to two people who love eachother, there are only three in the whole unvierse, the purpose of them is to serve as the perfect date destination for the couple, but the trick is..." She explained walking around sonicing the air, trying to avoid eye contact with Yaz. "The two people have to love eachother, and it has to be true, they can't fake it. The planet must be covered in psychic scanners. Yep the sonic agrees." She reported. They both just stood there in difficult silence. "Well" Yaz sighed. "Two best friends can still stay, can't they?" She asked. The Doctor returned her sad smile. "Don't see why not, doesn't look like there is anything here to stop us anyway."

Then out of nowhere, a blanket appeared and out of thin air, several baskets gently landed on the blue quilt. "Picnic?" Yaz asked confussed. "That must be the planet right?" The Doctor approached it cautiously. She then took out her sonic and scanned it. "Yeah, must have been able to tell we were considering staying. The sonic says it's safe to eat so we can stay if you want." The Doctor said to Yaz whose expression was unreadable, like she was thinking. Then she broke out into a huge smile. This is it, she thought, she had been waiting for this oppurtunity for...forever, since she first fell in love with the alien so many years ago, until now.

She then calmed down and said, "Only if you want to." The Doctor smiled at Yaz and sat down on the picnic blanket. Yaz sat down opposite her.

***

Several hours later, The Doctor and Yaz where still in the same part of the universe, on the same planet and they were both still on the same blanket. Except two things had changed; two of the three baskets where empty and Yaz and The Doctor were lying down beside eachother, looking up at the stars, their tummies full of food and butterflies of happiness. They had been talking the whole time, about their past adventures together, and about the other people they had met on their travels.

"...And then he kept calling me "Mrs Doctor" and I had to keep remindng him that it's just "Doctor", but would he listen, no. He kept flirting with me aswell." The Doctor told Yaz, smirking. Yaz sniggered, which caused The Doctor to snigger and soon enough the pair of them were laughing so hard that their tummies threatened to rip open. "OK, if I laugh anymore, I think that I may have to regenerate." The Doctor joked, as the pair tried to stop giggling after 10 minutes of uncontrolable laughter.

"Same." Yaz repeated, her cheeks hurting from laughing so much, not really taking in the fact that The Doctor had mentioned regeneration.

She then turned her head so she was looking at The Doctor. "But seriously, he was probably just really surprised to hear that you weren't married." The Doctor turned her head so they were looking into each others eyes, both of them no longer laughing. "I mean....I would be too, if it were me, because in my opinion...I think you are far too pretty, smart and way to amazing to be single." She admitted, searching The Doctor's face to see how she would react.

The Doctor stayed quiet then simply stated returning her gaze to the sky, "I'm not single." Yaz frowned in confussion and panic. "What? How? Since when?" She quizzed quickly, her heart racing madly. She knew The Doctor had had a wife, playing their conversation back in her head, she remembered the blonde saying "It was a long time ago, I was a different man back then." So surely that meant that something had happened to her, maybe she died, it sounded like The Doctor hadn't seen her in ages.

The Doctor chuckled and gently elbowed Yaz, "I've got you, haven't I?" She said. Yaz stared at The Doctor, trying to decide if what she had just said was a dream or not. She smiled, deciding that she didn't care if it was real or not, because as long as she and The Doctor where together, it was always going to be good enough for right there and then.

"Yeah," was all Yaz could manage. The Doctor and Yaz stared at eachother dreamily, their faces getting slowly closer to eachother's. The Doctor gazed into her crush's dark brown big eyes, knowing she was so lucky to have Yaz, knowing that she was going to cherish every moment she had with her from now on.

Yaz could feel The Doctor's soft hot breath on her face. She smiled as it tickled her, even the feel off her breath on her cheeks was amazing. Their lips were cms away from eachother when The Doctor stopped moving forward. Yaz searched her face, concerned, then The Doctor suddenly pulled away and sat up. "Come on, we're not done yet, one more basket still to finish." She claimed, while reaching for the red holder. Dan had wrote on the other side of the piece of paper to leave that particular basket until last.

Yaz watched The Doctor sadly, but tried to hide it. She sat up, copying The Doctor who then placed the red box infront of them. "You can open it." She said to Yaz, thinking that what ever was in there was probably for her.

Yaz reached out and gently lifted the lid. She gasped. "Oh no you didn't. How did you know I loved these?!" She exclaimed, lifting out a bowl of strawberries that were covered in nutella. "Well, the planet does have psychic scanners so-" "But it says they're from you." She lifted up a piece of paper with The Doctor's name on it.

Must've been Dan, The Doctor thought. This must be apart of his, and the TARDIS's, plan to make the perfect romantic setting for Yaz and her. "Yeah, I thought you'd like them, but I forget, what are they?" She asked Yaz who looked up at The Doctor with a shocked expression on her face. "You seriously don't know what these are?" The Doctor shoke her head. "Really?" Yaz asked astonished. "Right, you have to try one before we leave this planet." She said picking one up.

She held it up so The Doctor could take a bite out of it. Yaz fingers trembled slightly as she was scared that The Doctor would not take it, because she was holding it.

The Doctor looked at the strawberry then Yaz, unsure if she should or not, but this was their first official date (except from the one underwater) and she had to try for Yaz. And it's not like she didn't want to or anything, she had just never done anything like this with anyone before, but thats how much she loves Yaz. As she knew, from many experiences, new is scary and terrifying to say the least, but it was always worth it in the end, espicially if Yaz had anything to do with it.

The timelord smiled at Yaz and took a bite out of the nutella covered strawberry, making Yaz smile with relief. She sat back and put her hand over her mouth. "You like it don't you?" Yaz asked. The Doctor couldn't reply with words, her mouth was full of goodness, paradise, heaven. She nodded enthuastically. "Your welcome." Yaz said lying back down to look at the stars.

"Hey, you haven't had one yet." The Doctor said when she had finished the strawberry. Yaz sat up and watched The Doctor as she picked the most chocolate covered one out of the small pile.

Yaz sat up again as The Doctor lifted a strawberry and held it up for Yaz. Yaz smiled, she was delighted that The Doctor actually did bite out of her one when she was holding it but was even more shocked, in a good way, that she was now doing it to her. She smiled at the strawberry then at The Doctor. She leaned forward and took a bite out of the chocolate covered strawberry, letting the overwhelming deliciouness of the chocolate delight her taste buds. "Hmm!"

Yaz looked up after finishing her strawberry, noticing the blonde was staring at her. She then seen a rare glow in her eyes that she hadn't seen before. The glow continued as they continued to stare at eachother. Yaz sat up slowly, turning her body around gently to face The Doctor's so she could look at her properly. She knew something had changed, it had suddenly gone quiet and the breeze that had been gently blowing the whole time had dissapeared. This was the planet's way of saying, "I've done my bit, now you need to do yours."

Yaz looked into The Doctor's eyes, her heart thumping hard. The Doctor's own hearts were thumping hard, harder than ever, the fact that there were two of them made it even more distracting. She looked into Yaz's eyes, already having decided what she was going to do, how it was going to to go. She took a deep breath, finally ready to commit to it, and like Dan said, she stopped worrying, even if it was just for now, she stopped thinking about the future and threating about what might happen, because even if the worst was going to happen, she may aswell make every moment she had left with Yaz perfect, she didn't want either of them to leave with any regrets about what they didn't do, that they could've done, that feeling, that dread and regret being the next worst thing, but not quite beating the feeling of undescribable and unbearable saddness the pair of them will have to experience when they part ways, however that may happen.

The Doctor gazed at Yaz, noticing how awkard it was getting, if she was going to make anything happen she'd have to do it now before it was too late.

"Oh, you've got a bit of..." The Doctor mimed pointing to the side of her own mouth. Yaz loooked away embarrased. She lifted her hand and felt around one side of her mouth. "No, other side, here I'll get it." The Doctor said gently.

The Doctor put her hands in her pockets, resuracing with a blue embroidered hackie the colout of The Doctor's t-shirt. She lifted it to Yaz's face and gently wiped at the side of her mouth. Yaz closed her eyes as she let The Doctor clean the chocolate away, the soft fabric relaxing her. She then felt it leave her skin then nothing. She kept her eyes closed for another few seconds then, unsure of what had happened, was about to open them, worried The Doctor had desserted her, but then she felt something soft and light gently press against her lips, afew seconds later leaving again. She opened her eyes to The Doctor who was wearing an expression of uncertainty

Yaz smiled, reassuring The Doctor that it was OK. The Doctor smiled back at her, flooded with relief. She leaned in and kissed Yaz, this time while she was looking. Yaz kissed her back passionately, loving every moment. Yaz lifted her hand and wrapped it around one of The Doctor's braces, helping her to sustain the passion of the kiss.

They then pulled away for air, beaming at eachother. The gentle breeze had returned without either of them noticing it, and the soothing music filled the air once again.

#doctor who #thasmin #jodie whittaker #thirteen x yaz #13th doctor #mandip gill #thasmin fanfic #my fanfic #writing #my writing #chapter 2 #sorry if there's any spelling mistakes!

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thedistantdusk · 3 years ago

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Thanks to @jenoramaca @gryffindorhealer and @secretkeeper13 for the quick beta work!

A gift for my beloved @ginisbetterthanfirewhiskey.

CW: Language and domestic fluff

______

Trying

From the second he walks through the door, Harry can sense that something’s changed. It takes him thirty minutes to suss out why.

In retrospect, the smells coming from the kitchen probably tipped him off. Or maybe it was Ginny’s distracted hum, followed by the tinkling of plates and cutlery. Perhaps it was the fact that she prepared a full dinner, long before he even got home.

Nonetheless, he doesn’t worry about it too much as he greets her with a kiss, his hands cupping her chin. When he sits across from her at the table, there’s something furtive and curious lurking behind her eyes, but their meal is so peppered with normalcy that he doesn’t bring it up. They banter and laugh about Luna and Robards and wonder what they’ll bring to the Burrow on Sunday.

But when they’ve reached the stage of chasing stray noodles around their plates, Ginny finally clears her throat… and just like that, the nearly imperceptible shift he’d sensed earlier turns into something very perceptible, indeed. “Can I erm. Talk to you about something?”

He pauses, mid-bite, and takes her in. Her lip’s worried between her teeth, her hands fidgeting. Even her hair, normally strewn about her shoulders or parted to the side with a sort of effortless grace, is tied back and resting low at the base of her neck.

Ginny’s not normally this… serious. And he’d be lying to say it didn’t frighten him.

So he blurts the first thing that comes to mind. “Who died?”

There’s a half-second pause in which his chest clenches, his stomach churns. Could it be Molly? Or Arthur? George hasn’t been great either, not that—

But Ginny just reels back, confused… and it’s not until then that Harry realizes he’s really, really misread something.

“I… w-what?” she stammers, brow furrowing. She peers at him for a pained moment before her face relaxes into a look of understanding. “Oh. Oh! For fuck’s sake,” she mutters, rubbing her forehead. “I guess I’m thicker than usual, should’ve known you’d read it that way.”

Harry snorts. “Erm… darling, as many things as I legitimately don’t understand, I’m fairly sure this one isn’t on me.”

Ginny ignores this. “Did you seriously think that something dreadful happened and I’d just spring that on you in the middle of your bolognese?” Her lips twitch into a smirk. “Here’s some pasta. By the way, a fire burned a puppy orphanage to the ground. Could you pass the salt?”

He gives her a plain stare. Nice try. Years ago, he might’ve taken the bait and chased her down that rabbit hole. They might’ve had an hour-long, spirited debate on the existence of puppy-specific orphanages. But after three years of marriage, he knows better.

And she knows he knows.

Ginny finally draws a resigned breath. “No,” she says slowly. “No one died, ok? Or is even… I don’t know, sick or infirmed or threatened.” She waves her hand and continues babbling. “Last I checked, even Muriel’s still going strong, somehow. I’m jealous of that, you know— being old enough to just say whatever the fuck you’d like and have no one question it because—”

“—Ginny,” he cuts across on an exasperated sigh. “As chuffed as I am to chat about Muriel all night, I’d really like to know what’s bothering you. Please?”

There’s another pause as she bites her lip. Then, in one swift motion, she attempts to rise to her feet and push her chair in on her way over to him.

But somewhere along the way, something gets crossed— and Harry watches in bewildered horror as her foot catches on the leg of the chair. Then, right in front of his eyes, she lets out a startled gasp, her arms flailing, before she lands with a thump.

He’s out of his seat and on the floor beside her before he even realizes she’s cried out in pain and surprise. “Are you ok?” he demands, pushing her jeans up around her ankle… her tricky ankle, the one she hurt rather badly at the playoffs last month. Hm. It's a bit red.

Honestly, she hasn’t been this clumsy since she was 10 years old and near a butter dish. This does nothing to alleviate his fears that there’s something Very Wrong.”

“It’s not even my ankle that hurts,” Ginny grits, pushing up on her palms. “Wait— Harry, what are you—”

“Need to ask Gwenog,” he says urgently, running to the other side of the table for his wand. “She said that if anything happens to your ankle to tell her straight away, remember? Better safe than—”

She scoffs. “Seriously, Harry, I’m fine! I didn’t even land on my—”

He arches an eyebrow. “Have you suddenly forgotten the Puddlemere match? When your ankle broke clean through the skin?” Even now, the memory makes him shudder. “You heard Gwenog— without magic, you might not have walked again.”

“But there was magic,” she says, almost pleading. “And seriously, I’m fine!”

Harry finds he has limited patience for her heroics, though, while she’s sprawled out on the floor and nursing a bruise on her arse. “Gwenog’s instructions were quite clear,” he says firmly. “Having a pro athlete as a wife is a group task. It’s taxing on your body. I’ve got to make sure there’s enough of you left to enjoy our lives.”

Ginny clears her throat. “Erm… but what if you… haven’t actually got a pro athlete as a wife. Technically speaking.”

Harry swallows. He’s sure he’s heard her wrong. “What?”

With a wince, she adjusts herself against the wall. “I’m sorry… this isn’t how I’d planned to tell you. I’ve really fucked this up, haven’t I?”

Normally, Harry might press a bit harder. Normally he’d demand answers— and now. But as he peers at her on the floor, there’s something soft and uncertain behind her eyes… something timid. So he decides to do something he knows he’s good at— something she doesn’t let many other people do: take care of her.

With a sigh, he scoops her from the floor and brings her to the sofa. Then he props her against the pillows, putting her legs across his lap.

And he waits.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there, peering at her downcast face, before she finally says it in a rush.

“Iwanttohaveababy.”

It comes on a whisper. A breathed admission. He knows, just from her expression, that she’s never said it aloud.

But he must have misunderstood. There’s no way he’s not projecting, inserting the reality he wants instead. “Could you… could you repeat that?” he manages, his voice gruff and shaken.

Ginny just sits up straighter; her cheeks as red as her hair. “I want to have a baby,” she repeats, the confidence building with every word.

Oh. Looks like he was right after all.

Harry blinks at the carpet, his head spinning, mortified with the tears that have sprung, unbidden, to the corners of his eyes.

A baby. Their baby. A smile plays at his lips as he stares at her ankle in distracted bliss. He’s been ready for ages… longer than anyone he knows. It’s hard to remember a time when he didn’t want a family with her. When he didn’t want to watch her grow and change. To become more beautiful with every passing day until…

He swallows back another round of tears; he’d never forgive himself if he forced this… if he swayed her, in any way, despite what he wants so badly it squeezes his insides.

“But what about quidditch?” His voice cracks; he clears his throat to cover it. “Honestly Ginny, I’ll wait, as long as you’d like. We’re young. Think of what you’d deal with, loads of assumptions and press and comments.”

She turns to him with an arched brow. “And since when have I ever cared about comments? Since when have you cared about comments?”

He spreads his palms in resignation; it was a particularly weak argument. “I know. I just… don’t want to make your life more difficult.”

“Well...” She draws a deep breath and peers down at her nails. “I’ve erm. Actually quit the Harpies, all by myself.” Her cheeks begin to redden again. “I’ve already sent the owl and everything. Resigned. No intent to return next season.”

Oh.

That’s what she meant, then, about not being married to a professional athlete. Harry blinks a few more times as she plows through an explanation that could honestly be something from a dream.

“I’ve… I’ve just been thinking about it. A lot,” she adds, focus returning to her cuticles. “The Harpies are out for the rest of the season— that fucking Puddlemere match and that bullshit ref.” She glares at the pillow to her right. “Nothing like blind favoritism. Fucking prick should’ve been fired!”

All Harry can manage is a feeble chuckle, his hand moving to caress her knee. This time, he can’t bring himself to stop her spiral.

“Maybe it’s not just that match, though,” she admits, rubbing her ankle. “It’s also just… so much bloody work. I’ve been at it three whole seasons, you know? I’m a bit tired of missing birthdays. And family events. And only dreaming of bludgers and snitches. And attending the mandatory press interviews to avoid getting fined, and then giving polite answers to personal questions when I really just want to hex them, and—”

Harry laughs. “I think Sandra Richardson might disagree about the polite answers bit, darling.”

Ginny gives a dignified sniff and continues as if she hasn’t heard him. “Annnyway,” she says, toying with a piece of lint. “I… feel like I’m ready to move on. So.” Her face splits into a grin as she gestures to the corridor. “On with it.”

He clears his throat. “As much as I’d love to take you up on that, I’m confused about how this relates to quitting your job. You could’ve kept playing. Or—”

“—Why is it so hard to believe this is something I want?”

There’s a beat. He doesn’t have a good answer.

“What if I wanted to quit before I got pregnant?” she continues, her tone growing more demanding. “What if I was done with playing, regardless — and genuinely wanted to have children? Your children.”

She lets out an incredulous laugh, tossing her hands in the air. “I have to say, Harry, this feels an awful lot like you’re doubting what I actually want to fit a narrative of what you think I want.” Her eyes narrow again. “Is that really respecting my wishes?”

“No,” he says quickly, shaking his head. He’d never thought about it like that before… how it might be insulting, really, to question what she’s ready for. He laces their fingers together, feeling properly chastened. “I’m sorry. I never meant to… suggest you don’t know what you want. Or something.”

He hears the timid smile in her voice as she squeezes his hand back. “Do you still want a baby, then?” she asks. “Or are you just in it for the practice?”

A smile creeps across his face, his eyes still focused on her hands. “I… think you know the answer to that one.”

“Well, I’m not sure I do,” Ginny says flatly. “Because I just told someone who wants two million babies that I’m ready to carry his first child. Forgive me if I expected a bit more excited fanfare than acting like I drowned your kitten.”

“What’s with you and baby animals today?” he murmurs, inching her pant leg a bit higher.

“Wonder why I’ve got babies on the brain,” she quips, raising her eyebrows. “Maybe because I want one.”

Harry releases a resigned sigh. She’s clearly done playing. “Honestly…” He bites his lip. “If you’re sure that’s what you want, I’m obviously on board. Obviously.” His eyes flit to hers. “I just… I don’t want to be responsible for something you end up regretting.”

It’s the truth of the matter, really; the thing that tugs at him the hardest. The fear he’d ever burden her… the worry he’d ever make her less than happy.

Ginny gives him a small smile, her hand coming to cup his jaw. “I’m going to take that as a weird, sad Harry thing instead of an attempt to remove my womanly agency.” She narrows her eyes. “But that’s your final warning.”

Harry doesn’t need to be told twice. He’s on his feet in a split-second, gathering her into his arms with the stupidest grin he’s ever worn. Trying. Is that what they call this? Are they actually properly trying now?

“Get used to this,” she says as he strides into the bedroom. “Because once you knock me up— on purpose, mind— I’m going to request a lot more transportation.”

“I think I can live with that,” Harry murmurs against her lips, draping her across the bed.

And to avoid a well-deserved slap, he doesn’t say the final bit: As long as you can live with me.

#harry/ginny #harry/ginny fanfic #hinny #harry potter #harry and ginny

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ushiwakaout · 4 years ago

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You can’t tell me Ushijimas love affirmation is touch but he hates being touched at random.

THIS BIG GOOF OF A MAN need touch but hates asking for it and hates it as a surprise....

When you had first touched him, it might have been in middle school. You tapped in his shoulder and he jolted just a little, “Sorry, do you have a pencil i can borrow?” He raised a brow at you, “You came to school without a pencil?” You shook your head, “I write with pen but it’s math and i always mess up.... So do you have a pencil?” That was the first of many of your shoulder taps, it went for six months until Ushijima arrived by just setting a pencil on your desk before you walked in.

At the last year you had become really close friends and shared love for volleyball (although you only watched him play). It was around the time he was supposed to get out of practice that you heard a small commotion of boys outside the gym gathering around. No more than three boys who where in your class, surrounding Ushijima, calling him a left handed freak. You thought it was strange, “Hey! Leave him alone five-head!” You chucked your backpack at the boy who verbally attacked your best friend. “Just because he uses his left hand doesn’t mean hes a freak. You’re the freak because i caught you eating your buggers during lunch you fucktard!” The two boys beside the bully began to giggle like school girls, before he stomped away.

You heard a faint laugh coming from ushijima, which was very rare. “What’s a fucktard?” He asked curiously, which made you burst into a fit of laughter. You’ve never heard him swear before either. “I don’t know, it’s just the first thing that popped in my head... Let’s go home, i’m hungry.” That was the first time you held hands with Ushijima. 5:30 pm on a spring afternoon

In highschool you got more touchy. Platonically holding his hand or jumping on his back with the intention of surprising him but Tendo always gave it away with his eyes.

The ushijima fan club hated you. Tried keeping you away from him until their leader faced you one day during lunch. “Can’t you see that he clearly doesn’t want you? Why are you always trying so hard? He hates physical touch and yet here you are smothering your hands all over him! Don’t you get it, he’s never gonna date you and he doesn’t love you.” It was a little surprising to hear those words. “I don’t want to date Ushijima.” You told the girl, she gave you a rude confused look. “He isn’t looking for a relationship, he’s so focused of being the best volleyball player he can be... So why would i want to ruin that for him. If you didn’t know that, than you shouldn’t even be the fan club leader. Wakatoshi-kun is my best friend... i know he loves me. He would have told me otherwise... He’s too blunt to have kept me around for so long. Now if you’ll excuse me, I id like to eat my lunch, with my friends.” Little did you know that a few doors down, hiding away from you, Ushijima and Tendo where on their way to find you.

It was Autum at 1:10 pm when Ushijima had slowly come to realize that maybe what he felt for you was more than a friendship.

The day he lost to Karasuno, something had just been off about him. He sat alone with his thoughts. Tendo was no where around and his dorm was empty. A knock came to his done and he sighed, Tendo must have forgotten his keys again. To his surprise red hair didn’t face his eyesight but the white wall of the hall, until he looked down and you peered up at him. “Tendo sent me.” Of course he did. You blushed him aside and made him sit back down on his bed before shoving a goodie bag into his hands. “Eat.” You told him. He thought he was a man of few words. “Have you eaten?” He asked you, opening up the goodie bag. You nodded and sat beside him. He took out the black bowl container and looked inside, “This is-”

“Hayashi rice... I made it from scratch. You mentioned it a few years back while having dinner with my family. I hope it’s still you favorite.”

He rose a brow, a few years back. The last time he ate with your parents was 10 years ago. How did you remember such a small detail? “It is...Thank you.” You smiled at him. “Of course Toshi.” You watched his eyes twinkle when he took the first bite, since the game you knew he was a little off. Your hand rested on his shoulder and replaced it with your head. “Are you okay?” You asked him. He cleared his throat, “I’m alright... What about you?” His question was hesitant, as if he wasn’t about to ask but asked anyways. “I’m alright if you’re alright. But you do know I know you better than you know yourself right?” You tilded your head an examinares his face, “Unclench your jaw-” You had skimmed under his chin, cupping his perfect bone structure, “-and relax... You don’t need to be so tense. You’re not in front of the team right now, you’re in front of me.” Ushijima didn’t understand what you meant, did you believe you weren’t apart of his team? Of course you are. You’re the sole purpose this team has been kept together so perfectly , Shiratowizawas perfect, smart, incredible manager.

“Earth to Toshi? Where’s you’re head at big guy?” You gave him a small smile. He could clearly tell you where worried. “I’m alright y/n, you don’t need to worry about me.” You scoffed, “Bull. I’m always going to worry about you, even if we get old and wrinkly.” Ushijima let out a dry chuckle. “You think we’ll still be in touch by then?” He asked. He could feel your hand tense under his chin as you gave him a smile but this time, the look in your eyes was sad. “I hope so. You’re my best friend, i wouldn’t want it any other way Tosh.” He smiled back at you, “I wouldn’t want it any other way either.”

“Good, now tell me what’s on your mind.”

That night, when Ushijima spilled his emotions to you- You could feel your heart race just a little faster than it usually would and when he walked you back to your dorm and patted your head the way he usually would, you couldn’t look him in the eyes because i’d give away how utterly and endlessly in love you where with your best friend.

When graduation came along, tendo had snapped a picture of you and Wakatoshi together, the way he looked down at you as you looked at the camera with desploma in hand, excited to move in with your life. His hand was on the small of your back, something he got used to doing through the years, while your small hand tried reaching to his hip.

The small touch meant a lot to him. You where the first person in his life to accept his bluntness, to accept him for who he really was and we will forever be greatful for you.

When catching up with the former shiratowizawa team, much to their surprise you and ushijima where still not together, romantically that is, but the two of you lived in the same apartment, together... alone.... with no one to bother you. Semi nudge your waist, “So no progress been made?” He asked in a teasing manner. You wacked him with your table napkin. “Keep it down, no one needs to know.” Semi chuckled, “Trust me Y/n everyone knows but Ushijima.” You looked around at the team, they all nodded and agreed, luckly Tendo had taken Ushijima out for a private talk outside. You rolled your eyes and groaned. “Really? Is it that obvious?” They all nodded as Semi laughed at your dipair.

Once Ushijima and Tendo came back from catching up, the new wing spiker for Adlers could tell that you didn’t make eye contact with him through the whole night and the walk home was probably more awkward than ever before. “Goodnight...” You muttered, removing your shoes at the front door and rushing to your room, leaving Ushijima without a word. He raised a brow and slowly made his way to your room but a small sniffle stopped him from turning the door handle. How long had it been since you’ve been since he’s seen you cry. To be exact it was probably when you where kids... but that memory was fresh in his mind because he never liked the sight of seeing you cry. It made him feel... useless.

His hand hovered over the doorknob, contemplating if he should open the door and hold you, or give you some space. Ushijima shoved his hand back into his pocket, he wouldn’t intrude into your privacy like that. But through the night, Ushijima tossed and turned. Why have you been crying? Why didn’t you come in and ask him to give you a hug the way you did back in highschool. He turned one more time before rubbing his eyes and sitting up on the edge, maybe a drink of water could help. He looked at his phone.

2:00 am

He sighed and placed it face down again on his desk before swinging his door open.

The harsh swing of the door scared you as your hand was ready to knock on the wood. He looked down at you and noticed the red discoloration that hid under your eyes while some moonlight shined on you through the window that sat on the end of the hall. Your eyes where wide and shock but your body turned around, and back into your room. Ushijima has never seen you move so quick before. “Y/n.” He called, putting his foot in between the door and the door frame. Even if you moved your fastest, ushijima was always two steps behind ready to catch up. You sighed and looked down at your feet before letting go of the door. “Sorry... you scared me.”

He scared you? That was new.

He looked down at your fingers, which twisted and twirled between each other. “Why are you awake?” You asked him. “I couldn’t sleep.” He answered truthfully. “Oh... yeah- um, me either.”

“Why where you crying?” Ushijima was as blunt as ever, which made you nerveous. “I wasn’t crying, w-who told you I was crying?” You where terrible at lying.

Ushijimas hand cupped your cheek as his thumb carressed so closely to your lower lashes. “You’re eyes are swollen, you’re more is pink... You’re voice is a little groggy... You may know me better than I know myself but i have a few tricks up my sleeve as well.”

“I’m fine Wakatoshi-” To mentally scolded yourself, calling him by his full name was such a dead giveaway. “You only call me Wakatoshi or Ushijima when i’ve done something wrong.... Have i done something wrong?”

You sighed... Maybe tonight would be the night. “No. You haven’t done anything- that, that’s actually the problem.” Ushijima rose a brow. “I don’t quite understand...” Hs stated, of course he didn’t. As much as he was blunt, you had to be blunt back or it would get through that giant head of his. “Toshi- can we do this tomorrow- please.”

“No.”

“I-”

“I’d like to know what you mean, y/n.”

You’re full name... How it sounded so good coming out of his lips instead of others. You sighed and looked down at your feed before fiddling with your fingers.

“idontknowwhenitstartedbutithinkitstartedinhighschoolbutitdoesntreallymatterbecause.... iminlovewithyou.”

Ushijima grabbed cupped your chin and lifted your head, “Look me in the eyes-” you where quick to follow his command, “-and say to me again.” You couldn’t tell of it was the tears brimming in your eyes or a blush slowly crept on Ushijimas cheeks. “Tell me you love me again.” Both hands cupped your face as you have him a light laugh, causing tears to roll down your face. “I’m in love with you...” Ushijima gave you a soft smile when you kissed the palm of his hand. “I am so, endlessly, hopelessly, in love with you.” You repeated looking him in the eyes. “And i wouldn’t have it any other way.”

This is something Ushijima thought he’d never get to experience. Being a hopeless romantic, and for his best friend none the less. You raised yourself on the tips of your toes, wrapping your arms around his neck before pulling him down for a kiss that had been long awaited.

The next morning, when the sun shined through the curtains of your room- you could feel the soft cool breeze that came through the open window you forgot to close. You clenched your hand lightly against soft skin that you could already recognize. Ushijima laid beside you in deep sleep, a white sheet barely covering what kept you so wide awake last night. You snuggled back onto his bare chest and took in his scent, something you had come to not be able to live without.

The way his hands roamed around your body last night was a large progress from the first day you met.

You poked his shoulder, which seemed to be enough to wake him. “Mmm, good morning.” His voice was much deeper than usual, it brought shivers down your spine. “Good morning...” He wrapped his hand around you again and caressed your naked skin as his nose was deep in your hair. “How’d you sleep?” He asked you, his fingers teasing around your waist. “I uh- I slept very well.”

“Tired?” He asked, plating a kiss on the crown of your head before you nodded. “A little...”

“Sore?” You slapped his arm lightly, causing him to let out a laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes...”

“Stop it!” You whined, now hiding under your covers. “You didn’t seem to mind last night sweetheart... I would have slowed down if you did.” You’re blush grew deeper. “You’re so embarrassing.” You whine again, as ushijima pulls the sheet away from your face to pinch your chin with his thumb and pointer finger. He gave you a smile, “Would you want it to me some other way?” You eyes twinkled a little, before muttering, “No... I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

a/n: IM SO FUCKINGNIN LOVE WITH HIMS FUCK FUCK FUCK

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arctickat2400 · 3 years ago

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Grace - Part 2 <> Damon Salvatore

Ten years later

Grace looks so much like her mother. So beautiful and she turned into her mother each and every day as she grew.

And today is her 16th birthday. She’s been waiting for today for so long, and all these years she hasn’t asked about her mother once. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but she’s been so happy.

Our friends are coming today for her birthday. Caroline, Elena, Matt, Bonnie, Stefan, Alaric, and Jeremy.

Grace never liked to make a big deal of her birthday. It may have been ‘cause Y/N died on her birthday, but I never told her that. I never told her how her mom died or that Bonnie had to save her life.

We decorated the dining room in red and black, her favorite colors, and Caroline had set the cupcakes in the center of the table when she got here. Grace didn’t like having a big cake for her birthday. Always something small.

It was almost 12 in the afternoon and Grace should be waking up soon. Everyone was here and everything was ready.

I walked upstairs to Grace’s bedroom. When she was about ten, when she decided she wanted to redecorate, we painted her walls red, put a few posters up, she had a black leather bed and her room was mostly just made of red and black.

I knocked on her door, but received no answer.

I walked in, looking around. Her room was as clean as it always was, her bed was made with her bear set on it, yet she wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

She wasn’t in her bathroom and she wasn’t at her desk, where she would usually be writing in her diary.

Just then, I almost fell to the ground in surprise as Grace fell from above and onto my back. She always did that, surprising me whenever and wherever she could.

“Hey, Dad.” She smiled at me as I looked back at her with a smile of my own.

She jumped off of me, walking in front of me as I took her hand in mine and spun her around. I always did that. She was my princess and I was her king.

I spun her towards me as I held her in my arms, kissing the top of her head.

“How is my stunning princess this fine morning?” I questioned her with a smile.

The weird thing is that whoever didn’t know that I was a vampire, which mostly every knows, they would think Grace is my age, or close to my age.

“I’m pretty good. I’m clean and energized and ready for the day.” She smiled.

Grace’s POV

Today was my 16th birthday and even though dad didn’t say anything, I know that he and our friends are planning a party for me.

I couldn’t hear anything downstairs, since I was human and I didn’t have vampire hearing, but I knew our friends were down there. It was always like I could read minds. Everyone believed I could.

Wearing a red and black sweatshirt with black jeggings, I slid on my glasses and some rings. I, then, picked up my bracelet with a music note on it and slid it on my wrist. But I noticed something.

There was a charm bracelet laying next to it. I don’t remember having this.

I looked to dad as he smiled at me.

“Oh, yeah. Happy Birthday.” Dad smiled, and I let out a little laugh. “It was your mother’s and she wanted me to give it to you for your 16th birthday.” He told me. I smiled at the thought of my mother. I’ve never met her or seen her, but from how dad described her, she seems incredible.

“Thanks, Dad.” I told him as he brought me into a hug.

I slid the bracelet along with my other, adding my red heart necklace on my neck. Dad had given it to me when I was old enough, maybe three years old, and he told me to never take it off. I never have.

“You ready?” Dad asked me. I nodded as he held out his arm for me to take.

Intertwining my arm with his, we walked out of my room, walking down the stairs and towards the living room.

We walking into the living room, but no one wa there. But, within the second, everyone jumped out and yelled, “Surprise!” Even though I hated surprises. I just smiled.

“Hey, guys. Thanks so much.” I told them, hugging them all. Caroline, Elena, Bonnie, Matt, Alaric, Stefan, Jeremy, they were all here.

“Happy Birthday, Grace.” Dad said, pulling me into a side hug as I set my hand on his chest and stared at all our friends.

We started with presents, everyone sitting in the living room. Gifts were piled up on the coffee table. I don’t see how anyone knew what to get me. I mean, I didn’t even know what I wanted myself.

I opened my first gift as everyone stared at me. Never liked to be stared at either, but no one cared.

This one was from dad. It was a new journal with a dark sky lit up with stars and mountains on it.

“I saw that you didn’t have many pages left in your other journal and I know I get you a journal every year, but I knew you needed it.” Dad confessed.

“Thanks, Dad. And I do need it.” I told him, leaning over and giving him another hug. Hugging was always our thing. There were always things that dad and my mom did to show their love for each other and dad did some of those things with me. It was our thing.

After maybe 10 minutes, I had opened every gift and most of them were small but there were also some big ones. Lots of jewelry, a sketchbook, pens and colored pencils and a new iPhone. And my favorite, a new laptop. Dad knew I needed a new one. My old one had lost one of its screws and was all broken and beat up. I kept telling him how much I needed a new one.

After I had hugged and thanked everyone for their very appreciated gifts, Elena passed out the cupcakes and after we ate, everyone just hung out in the living room.

“So, what should we do? Maybe go to the grill for some pool and burgers? My treat for Grace’s birthday.” Matt suggests as he looked at me and smiled. I smiled back.

“Thanks, Matt. That actually sounds great. But, I need to go do something first. I’ll meet you all at the grill in a few, okay?” I told our friends. They all agreed, heading out the door and to the grill. I headed upstairs as it was only dad, Stefan and I left at the house.

I snuck up to Dad’s room, hoping he wouldn’t find me.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my mom lately. I never mentioned her to dad since the night after the incident, but I’ve always thought about her. I’ve always wondered what she looked like and who she was.

Dad must have a photo of here somewhere in his room, and it’s today that I’d like to see and know about her.

I looked through his bookshelves, looking in books that he always seems to have out and a few that he seems to never even touch. I looked inside his dresser and in his closet. I couldn’t find anything. Did he even have a photo of her?

Just then, I remember that one night I saw a box on the mantle of dad’s fireplace. It looked special. I didn’t want to go through his private stuff, but I just had to see mom.

I walked to his fireplace, taking the box down and walking to his bed. I sat down opening the box. There was so much in there. There was jewelry and then there was a note and a picture. I looked at the jewelry. There was a ring in there that had an engraving in it.

I love you. Always and Forever. Is what it said. I guess that was her wedding ring that dad gave her.

I, then, saw a necklace in there. It was a silver chain with a diamond heart. It was beautiful. I took out the note. It read:

My beautiful Y/N,

I love you so much. Nothing can describe the love I have for you. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You make me a better person and I can’t thank you enough for the love you have for me. I will never stop loving you for as long as I live.

I love you, baby girl.

Always and Forever.

I wonder what the note was for. It’s sweet.

I, then, took out the photo and I couldn’t believe my eyes. She was so young. It was a photo of her and dad together. They looked so amazing together, with his arms wrapped around her as he placed a kiss on her cheek.

I ran into dad’s bathroom with the picture. I stood in front of his mirror and held up the photo. I look exactly like her.

I walk back to dad’s bed, sitting down as I stare down at the photo. A few tears come from my eyes as I hear someone coming up the stairs.

Dad steps through his doorway, staring at me with wide eyes.

I look up at him as we stare at each other.

“I look just like her.” Is all I could say. Dad sped towards me, sitting next to me and taking the picture from my hand.

He set it back in the box along with the note and the jewelry.

Out of nowhere, “What happened to her?” I went right out and asked.

He just looked up at me with sad, but sympathetic eyes.

“I guess it’s time to tell you now.” Dad admitted. He closed the box, setting it back on the mantle and walked back to me. He sat down next me and began telling me the whole story.

“So, her name was Y/N. She was the most amazing person in the whole world. One day, she had come home from Caroline’s house and it was a full moon that night. I was at the bar and when I came home, she was lying on the driveway… dead.” I could tell he didn’t want to say that, but he did. He went on.

“She was covered in blood and she had gotten bit by a wolf. By Tyler Lockwood. At that time, she was still pregnant with you, and we were able to save you, but we couldn’t save her.” He was almost crying now. I already had tears streaming down my cheeks as I stared at him in sadness and terror.

“We were able to get you out and Bonnie was able to use her power to bring you back. You were okay, but your mother wasn’t. When she died, and I wasn’t there for her, I could barely keep it together. I didn’t even want to live. But then, there was you. I couldn’t leave you. Your mom would’ve wanted me to stay for you. And I did and I made it my responsibility to protect you and keep you safe.” I could barely keep it together. I stared down at my hands as I was so close to breaking down.

“Grace, I’m so sorry.” He said to me, taking my hand in his.

Tears streamed from my eyes as I finally broke down. I cried my eyes out, bawling, as Dad brought me into his arms, holding me close as I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my head in his chest.

“I’m so sorry, princess.” He repeated. “She loved you. Even when she hadn’t met you yet, she loved you and she wanted so much to see you. And I know she can.” Dad added.

Damon’s POV

Grace has been upstairs for awhile. Stefan and I were waiting for her so we could leave.

I walked upstairs, going to check on her to see if she was okay. I didn’t hear anything except a steady heartbeat.

“Grace?” I called out. She wasn’t in her room, and the only other room up her other than Stefan’s was mine. I walked through my doorway only to see her sitting on my bed with Y/N’s box beside her.

I stared at Grace with sadness and sympathy.

I can’t believe she found it. She found the picture and now she knew. She looks exactly like Y/N.

Grace looked up at me and said, “I look just like her.”

I walked to her, gathering Y/N’s picture, jewelry and my note to her and putting them back in the box.

Just as I set Y/Ne’s necklace back in the box, Grace spoke.

“What happened to her?” I knew this time would come at some point. I knew Grace would ask about Y/N. She saw her and now she needs to know.

“I guess it’s time to tell you.” I told her. I set Y/N’s box back on the mantle and sat back down beside my daughter.

“So, her name was Y/N and she was the most amazing person in the whole world. One day, she had come home from Caroline’s house and it was a full moon that night. I was the bar and when I came home she was lying on the driveway… dead.” It pained me to say that. But, I continued.

“She was covered in blood and she had gotten bit by a wolf. By Tyler Lockwood. At that time, she was still pregnant with you and we were able to save you, but we couldn’t save her.” I almost couldn’t hold in my tears . It was so hard for me to talk about Y/N, but i had to be strong for Grace. She needs to know. Grace was already crying, tears streaming down her cheeks, her eyes filled with sadness and terror.

“We were able to get you out and Bonnie was able to use her power to bring you back. You were okay, but your mother wasn’t. When she died, and I wasn’t there for her, I could barely keep it together. I didn’t even want to live. But, then there was you. I couldn’t leave you. Your mom would’ve wanted me to stay for you. And I did and I made it my responsibility in life to protect you and keep you safe.” I told her. She looked so heartbroken and sad. I could understand that. She stared down at her hands, tears streaming from her eyes.

“Grace, I’m so sorry.” I told her, taking her hand in mine.

She finally broke. She was bawling now as I took her in my arms, holding her close as she wrapped her arms around my neck, her head buried in my chest.

“I’m so sorry, princess.” I repeated. “She loved you, so much. Even though she hadn’t met you yet, she loved you and she wanted to much to see you. And I know she can.” I added.

I held her in my arms as she cried.

After a minute or so, she sat up. I set my hands on her cheeks, wiping away her tears.

She put on a small smile as I did as well. She let out a small laugh.

“Thanks, Dad. I love you.” She told me and I loved hearing her say that.

“I love you, too, princess.” I told her, bringing her back into another hug and kissing her head.

“Now, let’s get to the grill. Everyone’s probably getting worried.” I told her.

We walked downstairs, meeting with Stefan by my car.

“Before we go, I have one more gift for you.” I told my daughter. I want Grace to have Y/N’s car. I had never taken it out of the garage and I’ve never shown Grace before.

I led her and Stefan to the garage, revealing Y/N’s 2014 Chevrolet Camaro.

“Oh my god! This is amazing!” Grace screamed in excitement.

“It was mom’s car. She would’ve wanted you to have it.” I mentioned.

“Mom had amazing taste.” Grace laughed. I smiled.

She hugged me once more before we got into her car, driving to the grill.

Grace’s POV

We arrived, answering everyone’s question to where we were and why we took so long.

For the rest of the night, we hung out at the grill, eating burgers for dinner and Dad even compelled the bartender to let me have a couple drinks. Not enough to get me drunk, but he let me have a drink or two.

I played a game of pool with each of our friends, the best game being with Dad.

He was my favorite person in the world. He’s always kept me safe, as he has wanted to for my whole life. He’s loved and cared for me and I couldn’t ask for more.

#damon salvatore #damon x reader #damon x daughter #damon salvatore imagines #vampire diaries #matt donavan #stefan salvatore #elena gilbert #caroline forbes #bonnie bennett #jeremy gilbert #alaric saltzman

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matryosika · 4 years ago

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shoot me, chapter III

pairing — changbin x reader

rating — 18+

genre of the overall series — smut, angst, fluff if you squint

prologue chapter I chapter II chapter III

word count for this chapter — 3.7 k

warnings — suggestive, slight jisung x reader, mentions of alcohol, possessive and jealous changbin, choking and sexual tension.

note — i have been pretty ia lately because i'm full of school work to do. my semester is coming to an end, so i must turn in final projects and take my final tests too. i'm normally much active than i have been on this account, i promise to get back to you as soon as school ends for me. this chapter has just sexual tension but not smut smut and it's shorter than the rest but i needed to divide the chapter because it became way too long. smut promised for next one that i will be uploading this weekend (hopefully!)

taglist: @cozyblues @ahgasearmyfan @binnie-m00n

[12:17 a.m. Changbin]

i don't think we should to that again

it was a mistake

you looked at your phone at a extreme state of confusion. he had left your place minutes ago and, after an amazing session of oral sex, a lovely dinner and a extremely bearable (maybe even good) late-night talk, the walk to his car was all it took for him to develop a guilt complex?

[12:17 a.m. Changbin]

i just needed to vent but honestly, getting with you can really damage my future and that's not something i'm willing to jeopardize for sex.

you read his messages over and over again. it was the "i just needed to vent" that got backlash from you... did he really just came to your place only to ease his sexual frustrations?

you were still siting in the living room, hugging your knees to your chest. you hadn't lose self control once but twice, and not to mention it was with a man whose only purpose all along was to use you to feel better about himself.

"you really touched bottom this time" you whispered to yourself, feeling the need to take a second shower in order to rinse away all the traces from his touches and kisses on your skin.

maybe it wasn't really the guilt that bothered you. maybe it was the fact that, tonight, was probably the best night you've ever had for a while. he took well care of you, after finishing he cleaned you up and carried you to your room so you could take a shower and change your clothes.

he patiently waited for you while sitting at the edge of your bed and, when you were done showering, some delicious food he ordered was already expecting both of you at the dinning room of the house. during dinner, you told him a little bit about your life in japan and shared some childhood memories with him.

things were good, maybe too good for your own liking, but it only took a couple of minutes for changbin to remind you who he truly was.

not only that, but you also wouldn't admit the fact that you had a great time with him.

you spent the rest of the week calmly, having to hang out with changbin more times than you actually wanted to. he would often act like a gentleman in front of his parents and arthur, trying to engage in coversations with you often, asking you about your major and your adolescence in japan. you thought that he was just doing that in an attempt to hide the awkwardness of the air every time you had to spend time with him at arthur's company, but that didn't completely eased the fact that you felt your blood boil every time you had to be near him.

"you are coming, right?" ryujin cried from the other side of the phone "you told me you wanted to come!"

fuck, chan's party was this weekend.

"uhhhh" you mumbled "ryujin i don't feel good"

"y/n!" she screamed "is it because of changbin? baby? i have known you since pre-school, are you really feeling bad over a man you met barely 2 weeks ago?"

ryujin was right. you hated men, you truly did. and you were too proud about the fact that you had never cried over one, let alone have your heart broken by any of them. and it wasn't changbin you were sad about but the fact that he used you, you let him and then tried to act like nothing ever happened between both of you, which was even more humilliating. it always seemed like you had everything controlled but this time he was the one who got the last word and that was something you just couldn't accept.

"besides" ryujin added without leaving time for you to talk "i don't even think he is coming, chan said that he invited more people outside his friend group because some of them were not going to make it tonight, maybe he is one of them"

"maybe" you said "but i'm not willing to take a risk on that, ryujin"

you couldn't see her, but you could clearly picture how she was pouting at that exact moment. "y/n, you will eventually go back to japan and we will not be able to hang out anymore. is that what you want? do you want to reject your best friend on a saturday night? plus! the last time i took you to itaewon you had a great time!"

"speak for yourself ryujin" you mutered

"PLEASE" she screamed, making you squirm in your place "i promise that i will be by your side the whole time, i won't get distracted by the gorgeous, precious, well-built, amazing...."

"alright" you interrupted her "i know you are lying but i want to believe you for once"

she did a little scream of victory on the other side of the line and proceeded to set an hour to pick you up, almost against your will.

"what's the special occasion?" you asked ryujin as she went through all your clothes that were now laying around your bedroom floor, trying to find the perfect outfit for chan's party because you were dressed too casual, apparently.

"today it's the birthday of one of his closest friends" she said, almost in a hurry "and we are now running late because of your choice of clothes"

"i didn't knew there was a dresscode" you said, sitting at the edge of your bed.

"oh no, there isn't" she responded, now lurking around your suitcase and bags "but you need to let know changbin what he is missing out"

you rolled your eyes and grunted, of course. ryujin was that type of friend who would hype you up while you wear a killer outfit just to piss off a man.

"FINALLY" she screamed, finding the black dress that you stole from changbin at coex "i knew you had something around"

with hesitant eyes you looked at her handing you the dress, not sure if this easy outfit, like changbin said, would fit the occasion. "go on, it's almost 9 p.m."

by the bar incident you learned that chan, changbin and the whole friend group were a bunch of privileged men, but you didn't quite understand how privileged they were until you found yourself outside chan's house. the architecture looked excentric but expensive, at the same time. it was located in a pretty nice neighbourhood and was specially afar from the rest of the houses as if the most important value around was privacy.

you looked at ryujin and she seemed nervous. understandable. she came from a decent household but this right here just looked like the mansion of a western celebrity.

"are you alright?" you asked her, closing the door of her car before walking towards the stairs that lead you to the front door.

"this is the first time i'll get to meet chan's friends" she responded, making a grimace as she retracted "well, the second time, but i can barely remember the night at the bar"

"right"

right before she could continue talking, the front door opened and chan greeted you both. "ladies"

you bowed down to chan and ryujin immediately jumped into his arms, receiving a kiss in her cheek by the man himself "could you not?" you joked, watching chan's face turning bright red by the unexpected and euphoric physical contact.

"i missed him!" ryujin defended herself, locking her arms behind his neck.

"come in, y/n" he said, opening the door wider so you and ryujin could come in.

"who's the birthday boy?" you asked, your eyes scanning the insides of the house looking for any sign of changbin.

"it's jeongin's birthday" he said, proudly smiling like the father of an 8-year-old son "he's right there, at the couch. maybe you recall him from the bar"

you saw his face and immediatly remembered him. "yeah, the guy who just couldn't stop laughing"

"that's the one" chan said, standing right besides ryujin "let's go, let me introduce you to them"

the next hour was spent peacefully and you were almost thankful that ryujin begged you to come. jeongin, the birthday boy, was already drunk by 10:00 p.m. and kept making bad jokes that cracked everyone up. ryujin left with chan to god-knows-where and you were stucked with jisung and hyunjin at the living room, drinking ocasionally and having a good time.

"i remember you from the bar" jisung mumbled, getting closer to your ear as the music was already too loud. "i wanted to chat with you, but you disappeared quickly"

his breath smelled like cherries and alcohol as he was too close to you, but you couldn't complain. it was almost intoxicating in the best way possible.

"yeah i was not having a good time"

he smiled proudly "i'm sure i could have made it better"

a sarcastic chuckled escaped your lips as he placed a hand on his chest "you don't believe me?"

"i don't believe any man for that matter" you replied almost in a flirty way, not that you wanted to tho but the alcohol was already making you feel a tad extroverted.

"but i'm not any man" jisung whispered on your ear, making you feel goosebumps over the entirety of your body. before you could even say something back, he grabbed you by the hand and took you outside of the living room and into the patio, where a lot of people were gathered drinking and dancing.

"oh, i'm not good at dancing" you tried to escape, jisung holding you by one of your hands.

"you don't have to be good at dancing to enjoy it" he pouted, still convincing you to join him at the improvised dance floor that people made right at the center of the courtyard "c'mon y/n"

you were not too fond of dancing, but the music that was playing and jisung's insistence made you accept the offer. with small jumps of excitement he drove you to the crowd of people and started to move around you like a fool, inspiring you confidence to losen up a bit.

"i'm not used to this" you admit, moving your body to the sound of "criminal" by taemin, one of your favorite songs ever.

"there's always a first time for everything" he mumbled, his face dangerously close to yours "here"

his hands traveled to your waist and he held you closer to his body, feeling his soft and warm sking against the naked parts of your. "just let your body move with the music, it's not hard"

jisung's presence was extremely intoxicated and captivating, but not enough to keep you from notice changbin entering to courtyard.

and he wasn't alone.

your whole body tensed and you could feel how jisung stepped back a little bit. "did i do something wrong?"

you parted your gaze from changbin as soon as he saw your body pressed against him, and you gave a faint smile to jisung.

"no, i just felt shy for a moment"

he gave you a wide smile and continue to hold you even closer, your hips moving involuntary against his pelvic area and his eyes firmly fixed into you. "god, you are so precious"

"am i?" you asked, tilting your head to the side while dancing.

you could feel changbin's gazed nailed into your body and that was making you do stupid things. you wanted to make him feel jealous, for some reason, but using a man you just met wasn't something that would fit in your principles.

"mhm" he hummed, the movements of both of you getting slower as the song progressed. jisung's lips brushed softly against yours pratically begging for a kiss, but you knew that it was way too early for that.

you turned around on your place, your back now pressed to his chest, as you continued to dance against his body. his hands were glued to your waist and ocasionally would visit your hips, moving at the same rythm as you did. a different song was playing right now, but you didn't even noticed as your mind was flooded with thoughts. who was changbin with? was she his girlfriend? was he still there watching you? were you dancing with jisung just to piss him off? and most importantly, why did you feel the need to make him jealous in the first place?

before the trail of thoughts continued on your head, jisung's hand traveled from the tip of your fingers to your left shoulder, his fine digits dancing around your naked clavicles. "did i tell you that this dress looks amazing on you?"

his voice, the trace of his fingers and his scent made you act completely dumb around him, it was almost painful to watch. with a swift movement, you were now facing him again and kept on moving slowly. "i don't think so"

"well" he said, leaning one more time to leave a faint kiss on your lips "you look amazing on that dress"

and without expecting an answer from you, he kissed you.

his lips tasted exactly the same as his scent. the mixture of cherries, strawberries and alcohol intoxicated your five senses, making you unable to think about what you were doing. the kiss was everything except rushed, as if he was taking his time to taste every single inch of your lips and tongue. his hands were resting on your waist and lower back and the song that was now playing just fit the whole mood the both of you created, right until...

"do you mind?" a man's voice asked while you felt a grip on your forearm.

"give me a break man" jisung said, interrupting the kiss. it was no other than changbin, standing right in the middle of you and jisung.

"she is drunk" changbin said, almost in a threatening tone.

"i am not" you responded, trying to get out of changbin's grip.

"we are in the middle of something here" jisung insisted, trying to get between you and the grip changbin had on your arm.

"i'm not in the mood for a chat, han" his voice turned ten times deeper and his body language reminded you of that night at itaewon "i'm taking her home because he drank too much"

"let go off of me"

but he did not let go of you and continued dragging you across the whole courtyard and into the living room. "aren't you supposed to be with your girlfriend?"

you started to curse him openly, but he wouldn't slow down his pace. he took you out of the house and into his car without even saying a word.

"you are acting as if you were my owner" you grunted, looking for your phone inside of your purse "you just love to order me around, don't you?"

"that didn't seem to upset you at the bar and your house" he scoffed, his voice going completely cold as ice.

"you bringing that topic now is just miserable" you laughed as he started the car "i was about to enjoy a good night of fucking, something i never got to do with you because you are a coward"

changbin's jaw tensed up and you could feel how the car started to go faster.

the adrenaline of changbin's jealousy, the alcohol, jisung's taste and the speed of the car were making you feel particularly bold tonight, something you knew you would regret the morning after.

"why do you tense up?" you asked, teasing him "i know you wanted to fuck me so bad but still decided to not jeopardize your future for a night of sex"

you were not completely sure, but it was kind of obvious that changbin wasn't driving to your house. you tried to catch a glimpse of the street names as if that was going to be helpful to a foreigner, but it was too dark outside.

"you are not going to talk now?" you asked him, taking off your high-heels as your whole body rested on the car seat. "you were so bold a few minutes ago, trying to act like a fucking man intimidating jisung at chan's house. two nights of oral sex and i have that much of a grip on you, changbin?"

he wouldn't respond, and that only made your blood boil even more.

"you are so fucking pathetic" you muttered, looking directly at him as his gaze was completely fixed on the road.

the car took a sudden turn and parked right in front of a complex of apartments. without hesitation, he got out and opened the door for you, carrying you into his shoulder inside the elevator of the lobby.

the scene was pretty much awkward as you faced yourself into the elevator mirror. your hair was completely messed up and your lipstick was a bit smudged but other than that, you looked completely sober. not only that, but he knew that you weren't drunk. he just made that excuse.

the doors of the elevators opened on the 12th floor and you were glad that no one was waiting for it outside, otherwise they would've seen your ass on changbin's shoulder.

"you know i'm not drunk, right?" you said, still resting on his shoulders while he took his keys from the pocket of his black pants

"just shut the fuck up for a moment" he said, carrying you and leaving you standing inside of his apartment as he turned all the lights inside on.

"i knew your behavior as a gentleman was a fucking act and you only did that in front of your parents and arthur"

"you are so annoying" changbin whispered as he walked towards the black leather couch in the middle of the living room of his apartment. you followed him and walked right behind him.

"i don't have anything to do here, changbin" you mumbled, his back turned against you. you wanted to tease him, you needed to. for an unknown reason, you felt the sudden urge to make him mad, to make him explode. you needed things to escalate quickly so he would give you another reason for you to hate him even more "i can't believe i should be fucking with jisung right now but instead i'm-"

before you could finish that sentence, you felt changbin's grip on both sides of your neck "go on, keep on talking"

the lack of oxygen, the sudden movement of changbin against your body and his gaze flooded with anger made your legs tremeble "keep on fucking talking"

you could barely swallow by how hard his right hand was grasping onto your neck "look at you" you whispered with broken words, smirking as your eyes unconciously closed because of the pleasure "are you jealous, changbin?"

"why don't you answer the question, y/n?" he asked, his hold on your neck becoming softer as his lips approached your right ear "how did you felt when you saw me with that girl earlier today?"

an ironic laugh left your lips, trying to shield yourself from the obvious thing. "i don't know what game you are playing, changbin, but i didn't felt shit"

"really?" he hummed, his raspy voice near your ear made you squeeze your thighs together unconciously, and even though his hand was merely just resting on your neck, the arousal you felt from his grip was still there. "i know you saw me with her, and i could tell how that made you dance for jisung more... enthusiastically"

"you are wrong" you replied, pushing him slightly away "and pathetic, getting jealous when you were the one who cutted things off since the beginning"

"he is an asshole" changbin said with a mocking and sarcastic tone, his fingers tracing the naked skin of your arms as he licked his lips "and i must protect you, like arthur said. isn't that right?"

"he is a good kisser" you answered "i bet he fucks better than you too, not that i would know though because i never got to fuck with you"

changbin's eyes drifted from your skin to your eyes in a matter of miliseconds and for the first time in the evening you regretted saying something. "you are just begging for me to fuck you, aren't you?"

"don't get confused" you spitted "i don't want to have anything to do with you"

his hand traveled slowly to the end of your dress, lifting it up and reaching for your, now soaking, panties. his digits traced your slit and you swallowed hard in anticipation for whatever humiliating thing he was about to say. "are you sure?"

he removed his fingers from your core and were now glistening thanks to the light coming from the window of his apartment. "look at me and tell me that you don't want me to fuck you"

"look at me and tell me that you didn't felt jealous when you saw me with jisung" yo fired back, a faint smirk appearing on his face.

"i did" he admitted "i can't even begin to explain how mad i felt at the sight of your precious body pressing against his. all i wanted to do at that exact moment was to fuck you right in front of everybody, including him"

his hands toured to your back, unzipping the dress you were wearing as he looked directly into your eyes trying to decode if you actually wanted this or not.

"i know what i said last week" changbin mumbled, his fingers helping you to drag the straps on your dress all the way to your wrists "but your existence is fucking me up"

your heart started to beat even faster, your breath accelerated "and it wasn't until i saw you with someone else where i realized that i needed to make you completely mine, even just once"

you soon found yourself in your underwear right in front of him, his eyes looking at you up and down several times making you feel intimidated. you had two options: loose your self-control for the third time and do something that you truly wanted to, or leave his apartment feeling proud.

but you already made that choice when you didn't fought back enough to stop him from driving you to his place.

"please ruin me" you whispered, your soul immersed in arousal, guilt and regret.

#stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #skz smut #skz x reader #skz angst #stray kids angst #changbin smut #changbin angst #changbin x reader #stray kids oneshots #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #skz oneshots

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aching-tummies · 3 years ago

Text

Quiet in the Library!

I think I lived out a kink-scenario again completely on accident today (note, this was written a couple of days before posting due to a busy schedule).

My area is currently experiencing an unprecedented heat wave. We're normally a colder climate so built-in AC units are not a thing in our area. Older houses come with ways to heat one's house, but nothing to cool it down because our climate is normally either cold or freezing. On my day off from work I decided that I wanted to go out somewhere with AC to kill time. I had some stuff I needed to work on and some things I needed to print off so I made plans to head to a public library and work/chill for a couple of hours.

I discussed my plan with family members. Some family members are going through medical treatments and stuff, so the entire household has been wary of going outside and potentially bringing germs and other stuff back home with them. I'd be going out for "recreational" purposes. We have a printer at home but it is only connected to someone else's desktop...so if I absolutely had to print something off I'd have to hop onto that computer...which I have done in the past...so the library trip was more for the idea of spending a couple of hours in a building with AC going. I wanted to let family know of my plans so that they wouldn't plan for me to be at home...and also offered the idea of someone tagging along with me if they wanted to beat the heat in the library too.

Turns out someone else was toying with the idea of going on a grocery run but they were on the fence because of the heat wave. I suggested that I'd tag along with them on the grocery trip, help them carry items and all, and then they could drop me off at the library and save me one trip on transit...I'd take transit home when I was ready. With that plan, I suggested that we eat breakfast at home because I had plans to buy lunch outside while on my library trip and I did not want to have to buy or eat two fast-food meals in one day. This was all discussed the night before my day off, fyi.

Plan made, upon waking up we worked together to put breakfast on the table. Unfortunately, my first task upon waking was to chug some ice-cold water out of the fridge. It was hot and I was sweating not even 10 minutes after waking up. The shock of cold water so soon after waking gave me cramps. Imagine how you'd react to being rudely woken up by someone dumping a bucket of ice-water on you...yeah, that's exactly how my stomach reacted. I hid in my room, doubled over with cramps, and left the rest of breakfast prep to family members.

Something went wrong with breakfast, apparently, that resulted in half of the food being inedible so I ended up eating about three mouthfuls of food and leaving the rest for other family members. The spoiled breakfast put other family in a bad mood so they reneged on our plans. Timing-wise, it resulted in a mad dash to the bus stop for me after swallowing my third mouthful of food because I had decided I'd be in the library today. The little food I had eaten was only barely enough to whet my appetite and my stomach was grumbling and snarling for more by the time I reached the bus stop. I rubbed my tummy a little to try to calm it because part of it was still griping over the ice-wakening.

When I got to the area with the library, I had a choice to make: walk further in the heat, by-pass the library, to find food at a nearby food-court first...or hit the library as intended, spend a few hours there, and then search for food hours later. The heat made my decision for me...looking for food first would have resulted in double the amount of walking in the heat because I'd be bypassing the library only to return to it after getting food. My stomach had calmed down on the bus ride (thanks to some discreet tummy rubs) and was no longer grumbling at me.

I hunkered down in the library with my earbuds in. It's been over a year since I set foot in a library due to the pandemic shutting them down for in-person services. I missed this. My favorite thing to do in the summer in previous years was to bring my laptop to a library and enjoy the ambience and the air-conditioning. It doesn't cost anything but transit fare so I did this often before the pandemic hit. I was enjoying myself. I felt a little self-conscious though because people that walked by my table gave me strange looks...and I don't know why. I had my mask on, other people at other tables were doing the same as I--had their laptops out and were working on Word-Processing documents. I'm at the age where I can totally blend in as a post-secondary student...so I couldn't fathom why I was getting strange looks and I kept on checking if my hair was out of place or if I had something on my clothes.

When I wrapped up my work, I shut down my computer and pulled by earbuds out...that's when I realized that the rumbling I felt throughout my three hours at the library was not due to my music being too loud. The grumbles had come back with a vengeance and apparently had been going for at least two and a half hours. Something about tables always seems to act as an echo chamber for stomach growls and these ones were audible...so...yeah...my best guess as to why people were giving me odd looks: my tummy was growling and they heard it.

To add to my embarrassment, a stunningly attractive person was in the table behind me. There was no way he didn't hear my growling tummy. I packed up, printed off my stuff, and left the library in a rush in order to spare myself further embarrassment.

Onto food. I stopped by a nearby convenience store to hunt for drinks. Pro-tip when eating at a food court or going to the movies or something: drinks and snacks are cheaper if you get them from a grocer or a convenience store or something than if you were to get them at the food court or theatre. I know, it's bad to do that to a theatre, but most of the people I know working in theatres tell me that they don't mind if you bring outside food as long as you don't leave evidence...don't throw out your own wrappers and zipper bags in their trash bins and don't leave bottled drinks and stuff lying around. You shouldn't do that sort of thing if you bought concessions at the theatre either...but yeah.

The convenience store here almost always has a "3 for $5" sale on drinks...it's just a matter of which brand/flavors are on sale when I go. I lucked out and it was on 500mL bottles of lemonade that day...so I trudged over to the food court carrying 1.5 litres of drinks. I was hungry and it was hot, so I ended up buying some of those premade sushi platters. It wasn't a big one...8 pieces or so. I bought a small bento box as well that basically just had some meat on top of the rice and a side of vegetables. I was hungry, so I was sure that this amount of food was alright for me to finish in one sitting. In previous trips I'd bought a 2-item large bento and the same sushi platter...I'd be able to finish the bento and maybe eat 2 of the rolls before being full in previous trips, so I was sure that what I had bought would fit comfortably in my stomach.

I forgot to factor in thirst. It was a hot day and all, so I ended up drinking more lemonade than I otherwise would have. I drank 2 of the bottles during my meal...so an entire litre of drink went into my stomach along with the food. By the end of my meal all that was left on my plate was one roll from the sushi platter. I brought it to my lips but my stomach definitely didn't want it and it was too hard to swallow.

My gut was packed. The litre of lemonade (as well as about half a cup worth of water from a waterbottle) filled up my tummy and brought me to 'stuffed' rather than simply 'full', The food alone would have comfortably brought me to 'full' as I usually only have my waterbottle with me for meals so I don't drink too much.

I was wearing a loose button-up shirt over top of a camisole and pants that day. The clothes were very flattering and highlighted my slimmer waist. I've got a higher BMI than is considered normal/healthy...but my figure is basically on the bigger end of average rather than into full blown obese territory...and most of my fat distribution goes toward my bust, arms, and thighs so my stomach was flat in those clothes. Not after lunch, that's for sure.

My stuffed tummy was aching, stretched and fit to bursting. The glut of food and drink had rounded out my stomach and I was immensely glad for the loose button-up hiding the evidence. I sat at the table for a while, unwilling and unable to stand up because my stomach felt so heavy and there was pressure at the base of my esophagus from all the food. I was terrified that I'd throw up if I moved and jostled my tummy. I spent a few minutes discreetly rubbing my tummy under the table as I flipped through headlines on my phone. I wasn't paying attention to my phone, mentally begging my stomach to start digesting so that I could finally move.

When I finally got up, I opted to walk around the mall for a bit in hopes of coaxing faster digestion. My stomach churned and sloshed the whole time. Surprisingly, there wasn't really any gas in my guts. It was all liquid and solid food. The rice must have absorbed some of the liquid because everything felt like it had swelled up inside of my belly. The stretch was intense. Thanks to my clothes, I felt like some of those "surprise inspection" fanarts I've seen floating around. If I had a partner and a discreet/private setting, I wouldn't have minded playing out a "surprise inspection" scenario. I was alone in public and terribly shy and embarrassed about my tummy though. If anyone tried to press their palm into my tummy at that moment I'm sure I would have been embarrassed and that I would have thrown up from all of the pressure in and on my tummy. I was stuffed to the point it hurt--my stomach felt like it was on the verge of a rupture.

#stomach kink #tummy growls #stomach growls #stomach ache #stuffing #tummy ache #hunger kink

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defdaily · 4 years ago

Text

THE STAR Magazine April 2021 Issue featuring JAY B

Translated by defdaily.

GOT7’s eternally sincere leader JAY B. A friendly interview where you can feel his warm-heartedness.

*This interview was done in informal language to give off the feeling of two friends chatting*

It has been a while since we last met for GOT7’s feature in 2017.

Right, hi. I’m JAY B. Nice to meet you. Have you eaten?

JAY B has been chosen to be on the cover of THE STAR’s 8th anniversary issue.

Dobby is free now. (Laughs). I’m a freelancer now but I still can’t believe the fact that I was chosen to be on the cover of THE STAR’s anniversary issue. I’m so thankful to THE STAR for choosing me to be on the cover so I worked extra hard during the shoot.

How are you doing these days? We’re curious to know what you have been up to.

A freelancer’s daily life is always similar. I work when there is work and rest when there isn’t. I was busy recently organising this and that to release GOT7’s digital single ENCORE. I took the lead and there were many things I needed to figure out such as paperwork. So I was very proud. The members have all joined agencies but I want to take a little more time and think about it carefully before choosing. I’m still a freelancer.

Does the freelancing life suit you?

I don’t know if it suits me but it’s fun. Now work-related calls come to me directly, so I would be asleep then receive a call. I’d go “Ah I fell asleep for a moment, sorry. What is this about?” (Laughs). Since I do even these kinds of small communications myself, it’s nice and fascinating to realise the value of work and opportunities. If I didn’t have this time and experience, I think I might have not realised the value of work as much. I used to be on edge at times when the managers used to tell me things in the past. But now that I’ve learnt how much processing has been done before the information reached me, I feel sorry. Now I have a heart full of gratitude for opportunities.

I don’t know if it’s because you’re a freelancer now, but you seem much brighter than before.

Dobby is free now. (Laughs) I’m joking. Of course it was very helpful having a company. But now that I do everything myself, I feel more satisfied. I enjoy it.

The GOT7 members have all started solo activities. It must not have been easy for everyone, how did you come to your decision?

Right. It definitely was not easy. The seven of us researched a lot so that we can continue as GOT7 together. But then we thought that we should broaden our view so each of us could end up in a better situation. In the process, what we each wanted changed a little and, there is a future that each person dreams of right? The company said we did everything we could do on our part and that they will cheer us on in the future, that made me feel proud. We are also very thankful to the company. I felt that we received a lot of protection under a large umbrella. After all, the company is like the mother that gave birth to GOT7, so I’m thankful to them and respect them. I also thought a lot and looked into a lot of things about how to continue as GOT7. I also went to the president and asked him for advice, and I greeted and thanked Jinyoungie hyung for everything.

While preparing for new activities, what was the thing most discussed amongst the members?

“So what is it that you want to do?” “So what do you want to do?” We asked that a lot. So everyone said “We have to do it" So I asked again “No, not 'I have to', but do you want to do this? Or do you not want to do this?” If you are going to do something, you should do it properly, right? If you are not going to do something with an active attitude, I think it’s better to not do it. So we all came together and decided to give it a try.

It’s clear that you are GOT7’s leader.

One advice the company president told me was that my talent and effort as a leader starts now. Personally handling matters related to our recent digital single, I felt this “Taking the lead as a leader, I need to really work hard.” There was a lot of pressure, but if I don’t do it, who would. It pushed me to work hard.

You mentioned very clearly in your social media livestream that “GOT7 did not disband.” I felt your affection towards the team, what does GOT7 mean to JAY B?

One extremely important thing in my life. Actually, it’s an indispensable part. I’m thankful for the fact that our team exists. You have to know that because GOT7 existed, we individually exist too. It wouldn't matter if my beginning was as a solo, but my beginning was as GOT7. That's what made me who I am now.

How is Lim Jaebeom different as JAY B within GOT7, JJ Project, Jus2 and ØFFSHORE?

Comprehensively they’re all sides of me but if I have to split them, they would be a novel vibe versus an essay vibe. ØFFSHORE and Def. are all about music I like, regardless of genres, and honest stories I want to tell. As for GOT7, JJ Project and Jus2, we would have a particular concept and make it a bit more fancy.

Most of the songs you have shown on SoundCloud are R&B genres with a groovy feel. Have you ever had a conflict between music you want to do and music you have to do?

I felt that I needed to work harder to prove [myself] to do what I wanted to do. I can’t always be spoon-fed. To prove [myself] I made more GOT7 tracks and sent around 15~20 demos. Later on Jinyoung hyung and the president acknowledged me and said “Jaebeom will take care of the musical aspect. You can trust him with that.” I felt really proud hearing that. I don’t really feel a sense of conflict between the musical differences. From pop and R&B to folk and modern rock, I don't want to draw lines between genres and make music that sounds good.

We are curious about the music JAY B will show alone and what you’ll pursue. What stories do you want to tell?

I want to do a variety of things. Alone, I think I will try mixing genres and do things that are fun and experimental. I can also do R&B pop or Urban genres which I’ve originally liked. But that might change later on.

Is there an artist you’d like to collaborate with in the future?

Someone with a pleasant tone to listen to. Even now, when I listen to music and I like the artist’s tone, I send them a DM asking if they’d like to collaborate. And Korea's top hip hop artist, IU-nim. Do you think it's possible? (Laughs).

Then would you like to send a message to IU?

Suddenly? Um… I will work very hard. If by chance you think my song is alright, I would love for you to add your nice voice to them. (Laughs)

An appearance that may seem cold with a tsundere charm. But what do you think your real personality is like?

I’m the type that is quiet and calm, but people close to me tell me I’m a weird person. When I cry reading a book or watching a movie, or when I get emotional they say “It’s so weird, it doesn’t suit you.”

Are you the tender type?

I think I just often get hit by waves of emotions.

We’re curious about the lifestyle you seek and your values.

To live each day without any regrets.

Is there a place you’d like to visit after COVID-19 ends?

Kyoto, Japan. It’s a place where there is a lot of Japanese heritage and it’s also pretty.

Recently you have combined your two Instagram accounts @jaybnow.hr and @def.cnvs, what was the reason?

I’m the one doing everything after all, it is just the musical name that was different. I can’t split my body into two. I realised I could combine them into one account and just show the difference within it. And as I get older, it’s hard to manage two accounts. (Laughs). Was I too honest? Now I'm confused about what's what.

Was there any other moment that made you feel old?

I don’t do much and my whole body aches. In the past, my body wouldn’t get affected by the weather. Now when the weather is gloomy my back hurts and my knees go numb. (Laughs).

I can see that you’re interested in artistic aspects such as photography, painting and fashion etc. Do these things influence your music?

Of course. They affect the way you live in itself. I’m a person who wants to express and leave behind what I feel. Calling myself an artist feels somehow cocky.

What are you interested in recently?

It’s not art but I’m interested in moving around. Living as a freelancer, I spent more time lying down at home, but now I need a fast-paced daily life. I try to wake up in the morning to eat breakfast and nutritional supplements then go outside to photosynthesize and soak in the world. Everyone has to keep moving. (Laughs).

Are you interested in fashion and lifestyle curation and design etc?

I don’t think I’m a person who dresses up exceptionally well, but if someone asks I’d be willing to help.

What would you introduce as JAY B’s preference?

Freedom. Regarding fashion too, I liked vintage and grunge styles but recently I’m interested in work look and amecage styles. My preference keeps changing. I can't define myself clearly either, but I like the sense of being free.

What inspires you?

Many situations and people, my experiences as well as indirect experiences.

How do you have an indirect experience?

Watching movies and reading books. Nowadays I read song lyrics and unfold the scenes in my head. I try to think of various points of view in these one-act plays.

To JAY B, love is?

Nonexistent. A moment. I don’t know. As you live life, I think falling in love is a momentary emotion. If it lasts long, I think it’s affection not love. I'm a person who has to talk about love, but sometimes I wonder if it’s okay to feel this way. There are also many different forms of love. The love that my parents give me and the love that my fans send me. I’m thankful for everything.

While promoting for 10 years, what was the happiest moment and most lacking point?

I feel like every moment until now has been somehow lacking. Whenever you look back you end up thinking “I should’ve done better back then.” I think everyone feels that way. But I never regret those times I’ve spent. The happiest instance was when I spotted my parents at a fanmeeting and ran to them and held them while singing. It felt like I was boasting to my fans “These people are my father and mother,” and it also felt like I was showing my parents how I was receiving that many fans’ love and support. I'm thankful that the fans looked at my family happily at that moment.

Have you ever had a slump?

I don't think about something if I think I'm going to fall into something serious, but I'm the type who gets stressed out to do something new.

You are loved not only in Korea but also abroad, have you ever thought about why your fans like you so much?

A lot. I just don't understand. I'm not even popular among my friends... Why on earth?

Think of at least one thing.

Maybe it’s because I worked hard steadily? To be honest, during the past 10 years I have never not tried my best on stage. I can say this with confidence. I’m thankful to be able to do what I like as a job. I have told the members about this previously, I’m sorry for not being affectionate to fans onstage. It’s my nature so I can’t help it. But I have never been indifferent as a singer onstage, that is a fact.

Your bucket list that you surely want to achieve this year?

Being healthy mentally and physically. Since the members have started their solo activities this year, I think I should release an album as well.

Any words for the readers?

Everyone, I’m not saying this as a formal greeting but I really want to say thank you. Hmm… How should I put this? Don’t worry since we are not disbanding. That’s why I tried hard to release the digital single. Continuing on I’m going to try my best to do as much as I can. You might feel disappointed at times along the way, and I apologize in advance for that. But what I can promise is that I’m going to do my best. Thank you so much for supporting me for 10 years. You all know this already, but I’m not so good at things like sending hearts and saying thanks affectionately. I just want to speak sincerely. Thank you so much. I hope everyone will be more happy, not just because you like and support us… I could sound arrogant saying it like this but... I hope our fans are sturdy people who will find their own small sources of happiness in their daily lives even if that isn’t us. And I hope everyone is happy. I’m so thankful and I want to ask you to trust me.

Lastly let us know your future plans.

We will try our best to match our times and do GOT7, JJ Project and Jus2 etc. no matter what. Even if our times don’t match somehow, we’ll try our best to gather even 4 or 5 people and return, so don’t worry. And Dobby is free now. (Laughs). I will do my best in everything. I've made a lot of songs and I'm diligently working on songs right now too, so look forward to it. You’ll be able to listen to it soon. Thank you. This has been GOT7 JAY B. Please give lots of love to The Star’s April issue!

Translated by defdaily.

#jay b #jb #jaebeom #def #defsoul #got7 #got7 jb #got7 jaebeom

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stxleslyds · 4 years ago

Text

MY TOUGHTS ON PART ONE OF RED HOOD BY CHIP ZDARSKY :)

Finally I have read part one of the Red Hood story in Batman: Urban Legends!

This story is very interesting, we start with the Red Hood looking for the people who are providing Gotham with a new drug. This drug “Cheerdrops” has been passed around for weeks at this point and it has had devastating results among it's users. If you know Jason you understand that drugs are a big issue for him and one that he treats very carefully and seriously.

As he interrogates people he arrives to the building where one of the dealers of this drug is supposed to be, there he finds a horrific scene, a boy is desperately trying to wake up his mother who appears to have overdosed in her bed. Jason is quick to call an ambulance and get in contact with Oracle in order to find the boy's father who is (as he finds out later) the man that he was looking for.

Jason sees this scene and can't help but compare it to the time he went through this situation with his mom all those years ago, so he takes the boy with him so he can take him to his father, who Jason is hoping is a good man that had to sell drugs in order to help his family.

That's basically the premise of this first part of the story but now i will write about my thoughts on the specifics of the story.

The story begins with Jason giving a speech about fear and how it's used,

"Fear. Its a tool, it's his tool. I never really adopted it, maybe because he kept that fear all to himself." Then he continues with "Never had to rely on it, had to work harder to take out the bad guys, had to be...more direct." he finishes that thought with "Rubber Bullets. So that fear doesn't get turned around on me."

I for one really liked this Fear speech, it does really sum up what the Batman does, he relies on the Fear that he imposes on Gotham's criminals and such while Robin on the other hand was never meant to work with fear, which is true.

It did remind me of the speech that Alfred gave in issue #10 of Under the Red Hood about how Batman works with fear and Jason had some thoughts on it, here is some of it,

"Master Jason had a condescending practice of referring to the costumed criminals elements as 'dress ups'. He also noted that such individuals did not fear the Batman the way street thugs and mafioso did. The 'dress ups' did not believe he was a monster." "...the boy did say something to me that chilled me to the bone...even then. 'They all know he won't kill them.'"

Anyway let's go back to the actual comic I am talking about...

Jason speaks from his position as Red Hood in current time and says that he uses rubber bullets in order to keep the Bat at bay, the fear that the Bat uses against other criminals cannot be used against him if he plays within the Bat's rules.

As he was doing that he was actually trying to get info about who is making the drug but all he was able to get was who was selling it to the person he was interrogating. This drug is dangerous and Jason has to work fast.

Here is where we see the first flashback scene, we see Jason in the cave before he was able to go out as Robin and he is not to happy about it. The art is very beautiful but sadly in these panels i found my first problem with the context of Jason becoming Robin and how Zdarsky seems to set Jason's feelings on the first Robin.

It seems that Zdarsky is going for the “Jason believed Dick was the perfect Robin and no matter what he did he would never be as good as him” route, which fine ok, that's your right but, is it really necessary? I must admit i am a little tired of this particular thing because i adore the fact that when Dick and Jason first met they were fine with one another (even if a little wary at the very start). And the whole competitive and “i will never be as good as X person” is really tiring in the Robin/Batfamily fandom.

That problem is not as significant as the next one though.

Jason not thinking that Robin was “badass”. Well this is not only a bad take but it's completely OOC for Jason, no matter how you see it. From his first appearance as Robin to the flashbacks in Winick's UtRH and even through both of Lobdell's runs Jason has always loved the concept and the mantle of Robin as a child.

Batman v1, #385.

So that whole take is wrong, i don't like it and also who on this or any universe would rather call themselves Batboy? Honestly i hope this is never brought up again or i will cry. ((((Also in this house Robin will always be the name that Mary gave Dick and then he used as his hero name so it hurts a lot more))))

Also at the end of this first flashback Jason discovers a room full of firearms and is obviously surprised because Batman hates those so he asks why he has them, B responds that he has to understand how they work for his detective work, but that's not all he says, he also says this “...Guns are a coward's weapon, and we will not be cowards.”

Alright Mr. Zdarsky i see the irony... i also see the Daredevil / Punisher thingie right there.

Anyway we are now back to the present where we see Batman seeing the effects of the drug in one of its victims, after saving that person he takes some samples of the drug. We also get to see two police officers with different views on the “masks”, that's a nice way to set the story after the Joker War and before the Magistrate.

Back to Jason, he seems to be struggling, he can't find the people making/providing the drugs in Gotham and is also doubting his skills, he tells a man that if the information that he gave him is incorrect he “will find him” followed with another internal speech full of self doubt, “...sure thing Red Hood, right now you can't even find a street drug. Half of Gotham's teenagers could find it no problem. You never were the best detective.”

Alright, so Jason feels insecure about his skills now? First you have pre-Robin Jason not feeling like he could be able to keep up with the first Robin and now, Jason as a grown man has doubts about the skills that he has used for a long while now? I mean, press X for DOUBT because UtRH showed us how much of a badass and extremely skilled he is. This man planed everything in order to turn the Bat's world upside down (and this story has references to UtRH so it definitely happened) and now he feels like he is not that good?

Shit. i know where this is going, first the insecurities that he has already worked out... I can see it coming, the next big thing will be Daddy issues. Wonderful i hate it and i hope i am wrong because those “issues” are more than resolved, i know that's the only trope DC throws at Jason but honestly how different will it be this time?

Fine, lets move on. Jason finds himself in one of the apartments and what he sees is horrifying. Lying on a bed there is a woman completely catatonic with a horrible smile on her face and right next to her a terrified little boy.

Here is the best take on Jason's character so far.

Realizing that the child is scared of the situation and the masked man that just came into his home Jason takes off his mask and reassures the kid that he is there to help, it's quickly made obvious that the woman has overdosed on Cheerdrops, he makes sure to call an ambulance for her stating that she seems to be in a drug-related coma.

Its important to note that Jason is doing this as he is having troubling thoughts about how much this scene reminds him of the time he was in this little boy's (Tyler) shoes. Its hard for him but he soon realizes that he needs to make sure Tyler is safe.

He asks Tyler if he has another parent, he does and his name is Andy, after taking a look around the house Jason deduces that maybe the father is also taking drugs so if the police comes they will surely take Tyler and put him in the system, this idea is not one Jason is fond of so he calls Oracle, he asks if she can locate Tyler's dad's phone, when she asks about the kid Jason says that he will be the one keeping him safe.

Now we find ourselves back with Batman where he is investigating the components of Cheerdrops, he finds out that the drug is a modified version of Scarecrow's fear gas that gives the victim a sense of extreme happiness instead of fear.

Here we get confirmation of when in the timeline this story occurs, which is after the events of Infinite Frontier (where there was an attack on Arkham and many patients/prisoners were killed or escaped).

B suggests to Oracle that maybe Crane didn't die there and that he might be behind this drug, he will be on the job right away! To this Oracle is like well shit, so she tells B that Jason is also working this case...and here comes a funny yet confusing interaction.

Barbara says “I know you two aren't exactly friends right now but...” before she finishes Batman interrupts her by saying “He is a killer Barbara. I will do this alone.”

OH BOY is this interaction confusing! First of all may i point out how different this conversation is from the one in Three Jokers where the roles were basically reversed??? Please tell me that i am not the only one who finds that funny! Anyway that story doesn't matter here, but Red Hood Outlaw from Rebirth does, right?

Here is the thing, the last person that Jason “killed” in rebirth was Penguin and he actually didn't do it, he had him trapped in a panic room in his own Casino. Batman already beat the living shit out of Jason in RHatO #25 for it...and some time has passed, B surely found out that Jason didn't kill Penguin by now, i mean isn't he like the best detective to ever detective in the history of the universe??

Not only that but Jason has been using rubber bullets for a while and even at the start he mentions that, he basically implies that he is playing by the Bat's rules to keep him off his back. Maybe B hasn't let go of the duffel bag full of heads or any of the shitty people Jason killed during UtRH??? If B still holds that against Jason then why would he try to make Jason part of his Bat clan at the beginning of RHatO Rebirth?

Maybe he still thinks that Jason killed the penguin...but even then isn't B working with Harley and Ghost-Maker? You know, people who have killed? Why is Jason different? Did Jason kill someone recently that we don't know about? Jason only kills a very distinct set of people (that are very not nice) so i guess i don't see the logic...

Anyway second flashback, and this time we have a look at what was going on in the Batcave with B and Alfred during the events of UtRH! Nothing that wasn't explored in UtRH is said here but we do see Alfred explicitly telling Bruce how much they failed Jason. There is a heavy insinuation that the fact that Batman keeps sending the Joker to Arkham only for him to escape and kill more people actually makes B responsible for those deaths and i love that. Thank you.

Back to Jason and Tyler we get to see some very adorable scenes between the two. Jason gives the lower half of his mask to Tyler to protect his identity like a superhero and we have a really sweet moment in which Tyler chooses the Blue Hood as his name because he likes the colour blue (same Tyler).

After he leaves Tyler in a place where he will be safe he goes to the building where Andy should be and let me tell you the more Jason sees the less hopeful he becomes about Andy being just one of the people selling the drug... He does some shooting and incapacitating and then follows the man that is trying to escape and here is when shit hits the fan.

Andy is a disgusting human being. He hates Tyler's mother and doesn't care that she might be dead and the piece of shit hates his son so much that he gave a barely 10 year old drugs.

Yeah. BANG BANG BANG MOTHERFUKER.

If you think that this leads to Jason being a little more like his UtRH self, you know the guy that said that people who gave drugs to kids will get killed without a thought...yeah that's not happening, here comes the guilt!

I get it he just killed a man, but, did you read what that man said?

Anyway that's how the first part of this story ends.

The story is good. it has things that don't make much sense but i think it's because Zdarsky is a Batman fan and not a Red Hood fan in the sense that he doesnt know much about Jason's character and that this is his first ever DC work.

I cant wait to see where this story goes, while i hope “unresolved daddy issues” doesn't become a theme yet again in a Red Hood story i believe it's where we are headed. I will keep on reading because i am invested in Jason and Tyler's relationship and what is going to happen now that Jason killed Andy.

Let me know what you thought about the issue and my post if you want! Bye!

#jason todd #red hood #red hood outlaw #batman urban legends #robin #batman and robin

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queerspacepunk · 3 years ago

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Welcome to DADWC!! How about “A lifetime of laughter, at the expense of the death of a bachelor” (Panic! at the Disco, Death of a Bachelor) for Bull/Dorian?

thank u for the patience friend! I hadn't heard this song before but now I have. (Second @dadrunkwriting fill in one day? :0)

“You’re really going through with this, aren’t you?” “I really am. Are you disappointed?” Felix sighs, “I think you’re an idiot, and that this is a terrible idea but I’m also... strangely proud of you.”

To Blackwall, Cassandra, Cole, and 10 others: I was wondering if you would be free to join me tomorrow evening for... a memorial of sorts, for someone quite close to me.

To Blackwall, Cassandra, Cole, and 9 others: Room booked at the Herald’s Rest, tomorrow, 7PM.

To Sera: Room booked at the Herald’s Rest, tomorrow, 6:30PM.

From Josephine: Oh Dorian, I’m so sorry to hear this, of course we will be there! Might I ask, is this a recent loss?

To Josephine: Your presence is much appreciated. It’s something of a complicated story, I’m sure you won’t mind if I wait to tell you all at once, tomorrow evening.

From Josephine: No, of course not, forgive me for prying. Much love.

“You’re sure you don’t want to call this off?” Felix says through the phone.

“A little late for that now,” Dorian points out, “they’ll all be here shortly. What else can I do? Call them all and say, ‘sorry lied about the whole memorial thing, never mind’?”

“Isn’t the whole point of this that you’re lying to them?”

“Not lying,” Dorian says, “Misleading. It’s different. And I do think they’ll be a little too preoccupied to be mad, afterwards.”

“You’re really going through with this, aren’t you?”

“I really am. Are you disappointed?”

Felix sighs, “I think you’re an idiot, and that this is a terrible idea but I’m also... strangely proud of you.”

“Now, now,” Dorian admonishes gently, “there’s going to be enough sappiness later on, keep it together for me.”

Felix laughs, and Dorian can just about see him shaking his head.

“You sure you don’t want me to video call you in?”

“I’ll give the game away, just send me the recordings after, and Dorian?”

“Yes Felix?”

“Good luck.”

His friends arrive, almost entirely on time for once, in ones and twos and threes. Dorian greets them at the door to the private room, face solemn, and directs them to the seats he’s set out. There’s no faux coffin in the room -- he hadn’t wanted to get quite that morbid, but there is an indulgent spray of funeral flowers set at the front of the room.

Sera tries to ask questions, and is summarily shushed by Josephine. Cole tries to give answers and is dragged aside, informed, and shushed by Dorian. He doesn’t quite get it, but he must have a good feeling about the results because he keeps his mouth shut. Leliana seems to know something’s up, but is entertained enough to not say anything, and Bull gives Dorian a hell of a look, laced with enough concern that Dorian actually feels a little... guilty.

“Thank you all for coming,” Dorian says, once everyone is seated, and pulls out the stack of memorial pamphlets he’s had printed, “I appreciate your presence with me tonight, and your patience with what is a... complicated situation.”

He begins stepping around the circle, handing the pamphlets out.

“Er, Dorian,” Blackwall says, “I think there’s been a mix-up. They’ve put your picture on these.”

“Oh,” Dorian says, turning to the flowers to give him a moment to suppress the grin creeping onto his face, “no, that’s quite correct.”

“You better not be a bloody ghost!” Sera yelps, flinging her pamphlet at him as if to test her hypothesis. It manages, despite being a flat piece of paper that has no business being able to be thrown with any accuracy, to smack Dorian right in the face, which is unpleasant, but does at least seem to reassure her that he isn’t, in fact, a ghost.

None of the others seem particularly concerned that he’s undead, but there is a lot of muttering, and worried looks being pointed his way.

“You need an intervention or something, Pavus?” Krem asks with a frown, “cause I know that cries for help are actually a good thing and shit, and you Magisters-”

“Altus, Soporatus, you know better.”

“-fine, you Altus love your drama, but even this is a bit much.”

“I assure you,” Dorian says to the group at large, “this is not a cry for help.”

“You did just hand us all a funeral pamphlet with your face on it, Sparkler,” Varric points out.

“It’s not a funeral pamphlet, it’s a memorial pamphlet, and-”

“The dates are wrong,” Leliana interrupts, “The death date is a question mark so I cannot comment on that, however this is not your birthdate. You must have been... eighteen? Nineteen?”

“Eighteen,” Dorian confirms, pinching the bridge of his nose and taking a deep breath, “this has all gone rather off-track, hasn’t it. If you would all just hold your questions, and nonsense,” he throws a quick glare at both Sera and Krem, “and allow me to explain things, I think you’ll find it will benefit all of us.”

Bull, Dorian notes, is watching him very, very carefully. They haven’t seen each other since yesterday which isn’t entirely unusual, given Dorian insistence that they maintain their own homes up unto this point, even if he spends most nights in Bull’s bed or with Bull in his own, but he can tell that the fact he’s said nothing about any of this to Bull is concerning him.

Nothing to be done about it now. Nothing but going forward with the plan as intended.

“We are here, this evening,” Dorian says, “to consider, and honour the life of someone I believe we all care about. Someone who has, for many years been the life of our parties, a bringer of spectacular stories and an improver of our collective fashion sense.”

“What happened to ‘im?” Sera interjects. Dorian rolls his eyes but doesn’t grizzle.

“Nothing, as of yet,” Dorian reassures them, “but the bachelor of which we speak has, while not by anyone’s definition a selfless man, has decided that there are certain things worth sacrificing one’s life for.”

They look at him (with the exception of Cole of course, and Vivienne who’s grinning like she knows the answer is is utterly uninterested in giving hints to anyone else) like he’s spouting absolute gibberish. He’d hoped his friends would be a little more advanced in their thinking, but alas. If he has to help them along, so be it.

“How,” he says, “does one kill a bachelor?”

“Shoot ‘im!” Sera suggests.

“Blunt force trauma?” Krem asks, “to the head?”

Leliana hums quietly, “poison?”

“Blessed Maker,” Dorian says aghast, “what is wrong with you?”

“Hate to break it to you,” Herah points out, “but you did invite us all along to what is looking a lot like a fake memorial service for yourself. Your high horse is more of a rocking pony.”

Dorian rolls his eyes, “how long did it take you to think of that?”

Herah pouts, “a couple of minutes.”

“Well done, regardless,” Dorian admits, “now you’ve all had enough time to think. Varric, surely you’ll know. How does one kill a bachelor?

“Explosion?”

“Oh for-” Dorian throws his hands in the air and turns away from them all, trying to come up with a plan B for how he’s going to make this happen. He can tell them the answer, of course, but it won’t be at all the same and someone figuring it out themselves-

“Oh,” Cassandra says, “of course.”

Dorian spins back to look at her, as does everyone else in the room, and she flushes.

“Isn’t it obvious?” she insists, “to kill a bachelor, you marry him.”

They all stare at Cassandra a moment before turning, slowly, to Dorian, who has taken advantage of their distraction to sink to his knee, and pull the ring box from his pocket.

“The Iron Bull,” he says, and he’s not choking up dammit, of course he isn’t, he’s practiced this too many time for that to happen, “I have been a bachelor for over a decade now, and I have thought for some time that it was something I would never give up. That I could not ask for more than what I had.”

“Dorian-” Bull says and there must be something wrong with the acoustics in here, because now he sounds like his voice is cracking and there’s not way that can be the truth.

“Hush,” Dorian says, gently, “let me finish.”

Bull does, closes his mouth and leans back in his chair but not before taking Dorian’s hand in his own, and holding it.

“Right,” Dorian says, “as I was saying. Bull you have come along and swept everything out from under me. Shown me that there is in fact, a whole other life to be had. A life full of laughter, a life full of love, and safety, and honesty.”

And bugger it all he is crying now, and he can only thank the Maker for the fact that he’s a pretty crier.

“I have realised,” Dorian says, “that this is a life I want, even if it comes at the expense of the death of a bachelor.”

He opens the box. It wasn’t easy convincing someone to make an untinted dawnstone ring, or managing to get the measurements without Bull noticing, but he’s done it.

“The Iron Bull, will you marry me?”

#dadwc #i came up with this idea like an hour and a half ago and now it's WRITTE #N #how's that for turnaround huh #dragon age #dragonage #the iron bull #dorian pavus #adoribull #fix it in post #bing bong

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