#the flip flopping to liking him again is so funny

[shedontlovehuhself]

I gotta roll my eyes at all the people on here and twitter who were recently talking shit about Misha, saying they're done with him but are now acting like fans again. I mean, they're only posting about him in relation to Jensen, so really it's about using him for their cockles narrative. Just the typical spn/Misha "fan" things.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Just wait, Roku's gonna see Kyoshi and call her "mommy" (non-sexual) and Kyoshi's just going to stare blankly at him and be like "Fucking hell, you ARE my reincarnation. Is this was Kuruk felt like? Thank fucking christ Nyahitha is dead, I wouldn't be able to take the bullshit coming out of his mouth"

And Roku is just standing there both embarrassed to all hell, terrified (he called the scariest lady in the world to ever live mommy c'mon), and confused as fuck. jkaljsfs;af

[smile-files]

at the end of the day... suitcase and marshmallow are cool as hell (whatever is going on with knife)

[todayisafridaynight]

one day ill stop treating aoki like he was a guy i personally knew that died but todays not that day

[kittlyns]

Samsung guy also had the audacity to tell me to "just make a new account" and I got so mad cuz like. my only hope of seeing any of my memories from the past 5 years of my life are connected to that one account, and it's not even a guarantee. But it's still a small hope and I'm not giving it up.

[critterbitter]

The twins and their starters may have grown slightly taller, but their love of shenanigans have tripled, no, quadrupled in size.

On that note did you know Eelectrik has a glow animation?? Perfect nightlight eel. Absolute gold standard for creature. Click here for the masterlist!

Bonus shitpost under cut ft @birdsaretoddlers’s incredible take.

(plus a fanfic drabble that birds did while we were discussing in chat! Check out their funny writing @birdsaretoddlers) “Lam lam pentttt. Lam.”

“Language. I am not calling them that. This is a civil discussion about the capacity of a 284 Berkshire’s firebox, not a playground argument.”

“Lammm Pent.”

“If you possess my phone I will have to put you in time-out in your ball, and neither of us will like that.”

The argument over a literal online flame war was cut short by the door flying open, one of the hinges breaking off with the force and flying somewhere into the aether, never to be seen again. Or at least, not without a strong magnet.

Emmet stood there, proudly, holding his newly-evolved Eelektrik, his grin a mile wide. Ingo picked his heart up out of his femoral artery, where it had lodged itself, and gently removed Lampent from where she hid, hanging over his shoulder. Emmet stood there, eyes twinkling, clearly ready to perform the coveted Bit. Ingo opened his mouth, got halfway through a word, and his twin took the proffered delight of cutting him off.

“I am Emmet and I discovered something INCREDIBLE. INGO LOOK.”

Ingo looked, because what else was he going to do? He would allow his twin to complete his circus act, it was only proper and polite. Eelektrik trilled with delight. Emmet twirled like the best of Nimbasan runway models, clearly wrestling his eel, cooing platitudes to it as he writhed and squirmed to get it into position.

“Me beautiful slimy baby, my beloved pool noodle, my beeesstt conductor!~” Doing something that could generously be called ‘dislocating his shoulders’, Emmet managed to get his eel flipped up and around his neck. He flopped forwards, bonelessly, tipping his hat and giggling madly. He was grinning harder than normal. Ingo was a little scared.

“But now, Eelektrik can do MORE. OBSERVE.”

He threw his shoulders back, standing up as tall as he could, somehow not throwing himself ass-first onto the floor as the fifty pounds of eel he was currently deadlifting remained stationary over his neck. Emmet’s arms flew upwards and out, rocking back and forth in jazz hands. Eelektrik frilled its fans, made another happy little buzz and-

"Eelektrik boa."

“DRAGONS ALMIGHTY. THE EEL GLOWS.”

There it was, clear as day. Eelektrik flashed it’s spots in natural bioluminescence, blinking like a neon sign. Bright beautiful yellow and clearly charged, Emmet’s hair stood on end, pushing his hat an inch off his head. They blinked in a rhythmic, pulsing manner. It was almost hypnotizing to watch, in a way. Ingo snapped back to reality, realizing his mouth had dropped open and Lampent had ceased questing for his Pokedex. Recognizing Emmet was looking for a response, he threw his arm out in a thumbs-up so fast his arm hurt, snapping his suspender against his neck.

“Brrravo! Ten out of ten! Majestic eel scarf!” He praised, Emmet’s expression only growing further full of himself and his achievement, which was well deserved. Lampent echoed the sentiment, flashing back at Eelektrik in response.

Now that both Pokemon could glow, they’d never have a problem in the caves again!

[satanghulu]

under a trance!

✦ PAIRING: mammon x reader ✦ SUMMARY: mammon goes under anesthesia. shenanigans ensues. ✦ WC: 0.7K

| MASTERLIST

══════════════════

“Yer’ so cute.”

The sight in front of you could only be described as endearing. It was cute, unbearably so. The ditzy look on Mammon’s face and his dopey smile makes you want to pinch his cheek, but you refrain from doing so to maintain some form of dignity.

“Thanks?” You answer, shifting his current position to sit upright, prompting him against the wall as he flops around like a boneless pack of goo. You stifled a laugh. Lucifer had assigned you to pick up Mammon from the dentist, which you had initially assumed was for a regular dental checkup. Though looking at the state of the demon in front of you, he definitely had undergone some kind of procedure. 

“Who are you?” Mammon threw his arms over you as he leaned into your chest to take in a deep inhale, “You smell so good.” He mumbles with his cheeks squashed against you. His half-lidded eyes were hazy and you couldn’t stop yourself from giving him a quick pat on the head.

“I’m your human.” You said simply. His face scrunches up into an adorable frown as he pulls back to pout at you. The sound of the door opening sends Mammon scuttling back with a groan, knocking his head against the wall. Thankfully, demons are hardier than they look, and after a quick checkover, you twisted to see who had entered the room.

“Ah, you’re here to pick Mammon up right?” A person? demon clad in all white, presumbly the dentist, questions you. He peers past you to look at the patient, who is hissing at him and taking a defensive stance. It was pretty amusing to see a full-grown man curl in on himself to exhibit behaviour similar to the cats that Satan feeds.

You nod.

“Great. He just took out his wisdom teeth and is now under anesthesia. The effects should wear off pretty quickly.” The dentist starts, tapping on his clipboard before handing you a stack of instructions. He then continues to overwhelm you with a long list of aftercare steps that you have already forgotten. Noticing you were distracted, Mammon had taken his chance to cling onto you again, nudging your hand to find its place on the top of his head. You take it as a cue to start petting him.

It was kinda sweet how little inhibitions the Avatar of Greed had when he was medicated. It makes your stomach do a flip whenever he directs you a dorky grin. It almost makes you wish that he could be more forthcoming but his brand of tsundere was what appealed to you to fall head over heels in the first place.

Somehow, the admission that demons had wisdom teeth came to you as a surprise and the thought of it was pretty funny. Briefly, you wonder if the other brothers had already gone through this process.

From your position on the bed beside Mammon, you idly continue your action of stroking his head while he mumbles gibberish into your chest. And you’re pretty sure he’s also slobbering on you if the wet patches on the front of your shirt were any indication. (And of course, you jumped at the chance to take multiple photos and videos and had already backed it up.)

“Mammon.” You tried to admonish him. He lifts his head dazedly at the sound of your voice, and you can’t help but change your tone to coo at him. It was so adorable to watch him preen under your attention. It was a rare sight to see him like this and you were going to exploit every opportunity you could. 

You kiss the top of his head.

“No… I have my treasure…” His voice had shifted to a sleepier tone even as his arms tightened around you. But seriously, he has you in his arms and he’s still thinking about Goldie? You were slightly offended at the thought.

“Ya smell like them… My treasure. Treasure!” Mammon roared, suddenly biting the corner of your shoulder hard. A flash of pain jolted through you at his unexpected movement.

“What the-- Ouch!” You quickly swatted him with the back of his hand, glancing down at your shoulder to see the damage sustained. A clear impression of the bite mark was imprinted right on the edge, though thankfully, it wasn’t as deep as it had felt.

You pull back to look at him disapprovingly.

“Treasure!” He slurs happily with a dumb look. This time, you kind of wanted to punch him.

══════════════════

a/n ▸ dorky mammon has my heart. also i know I'm terribly late for his birthday whoops

[sushiyuzu]

tease

warning: fluff + tension — you start teasing sylus by squishing his cheeks and making silly faces, but sylus quickly turns the tables 👀

- second acc: @blushpawss

“i’m bored…” you whined, dramatically flopping onto the couch next to sylus.

he glanced at you from the book he was reading, raising an eyebrow. “is that so?” he asked, his deep voice teasing.

“yes, and you’re not helping!” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest. “you’ve been sitting there reading for ages, and i’m just dying of boredom here!”

sylus chuckled softly, flipping a page in his book. “what would you like me to do about it?”

“entertain me, of course!” you said, leaning closer to him, resting your chin on his shoulder. when he didn’t respond immediately, you gave a fake, dramatic sigh, nudging him gently. “hellooooo? mr. fun police?”

he smirked at your antics but didn’t take his eyes off the page. “i thought i was supposed to be the responsible one,” he replied with a playful tone. “can’t be fun all the time, you know.”

you pouted, but a mischievous idea popped into your head. without warning, you reached up and pinched his cheek gently, pulling it out just a little.

sylus blinked, clearly caught off guard. “what are you—”

“oh my gosh,” you giggled, giving his cheek a little tug. “look at you, all serious with your book… and now you’re like a little chipmunk!” you laughed, delighted by how his face changed when you squished it.

he tried to keep a straight face, but you could see the corners of his mouth twitching. “are you seriously doing this right now?” he asked, his voice amused.

“oh, i’m just getting started,” you said, still giggling as you moved your hands to his other cheek, pulling them both outward now. “look! now you’ve got fish lips!”

sylus sighed, but you could tell he was trying not to laugh. “you’re impossible.”

“and you’re too handsome! i need to fix that,” you teased, smushing his cheeks together until his lips puckered into an exaggerated pout. “there we go. much better!”

you burst into laughter, absolutely losing it at how ridiculous he looked with his face all squished up like that. sylus, ever the good sport, just shook his head slightly, his crimson eyes still glinting with humor.

“i see you’ve found a new hobby,” he said, his voice slightly muffled by the way you had his face trapped in your hands.

“you’re too serious all the time!” you said between giggles, still holding onto his cheeks. “i’m just trying to loosen you up a bit!”

“this is… certainly one way to do it,” sylus replied, his tone dry but playful.

you laughed again, giving his cheeks a little wiggle before letting go. his skin bounced back into place, and you couldn’t help but giggle at how quickly he regained his usual calm, handsome look.

“how do you do that?” you asked, poking his cheek once more. “it’s like your face is made of rubber or something.”

“practice,” he said with a grin, finally closing his book and setting it aside. “you done yet, or are you planning to keep torturing me?”

“oh, i’m definitely not done!” you said with a playful grin, scooting closer to him. “now that i’ve discovered how fun your face is, there’s no going back.”

before sylus could react, you grabbed his face again, this time squishing his cheeks upwards so his eyes looked smaller and his lips pressed together in a funny way. “look! now you’re a grumpy cat!”

you both burst out laughing at the ridiculous face you’d made, and sylus finally gave in to the silliness of it all. “you’re unbelievable,” he said, his voice filled with affection despite the playful complaint.

“but you love it,” you said with a grin, leaning forward to kiss his squished cheek.

he smiled, his crimson eyes softening as he looked at you. “i do,” he admitted, his voice gentle.

you were about to pull away, satisfied with your teasing, when suddenly sylus moved faster than you expected, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you closer to him in one swift motion.

“hey—!” you yelped, caught off guard, but your words died in your throat when you saw the mischievous glint in his eyes.

before you could react, sylus leaned in and gently bit your cheek, just enough to make you squeak in surprise.

“s-sylus!” you gasped, your face instantly heating up. “what the heck was that?”

he pulled back slightly, his lips curving into a playful smirk. “what? you were squishing my face, so i figured it was only fair.”

your heart skipped a beat at how close he still was, his warm breath brushing against your skin. “i… i didn’t bite you!”

he chuckled, the sound low and teasing. “well, maybe you should’ve,” he teased, his hands still resting firmly on your waist, holding you in place.

you could feel your cheeks burning, and the playful atmosphere suddenly shifted, the air between you charged with something else entirely. sylus’s gaze was intense, and you could feel the tension building as his thumb brushed softly against your side.

“what’s the matter?” he asked, his voice dropping to a low murmur. “you’re looking a little red.”

“i’m not—” you stammered, but your body betrayed you, the heat rising in your face impossible to hide. “you’re… too close.”

“am i?” he whispered, his lips dangerously close to your ear now.

you couldn’t form a proper response, your heart pounding in your chest as his breath tickled your skin. for a moment, it felt like the world had narrowed down to just the two of you, and the teasing had turned into something much more… electric.

“you’re adorable when you’re flustered,” sylus murmured, pulling back just enough to look into your eyes, his smirk softening into something more affectionate. “i like it.”

you swallowed hard, trying to keep your cool, but it was impossible with the way he was looking at you, his crimson eyes full of warmth and mischief.

“y-you’re impossible,” you muttered, trying to sound annoyed, but the way your voice shook betrayed you.

sylus laughed softly, finally releasing his hold on your waist and leaning back. “maybe,” he said with a grin, “but you love it.”

you huffed, trying to regain your composure, but the truth was… yeah, you did.

[arieswritez]

vincible

vincible | mark grayson x gn!reader (fluff)

alright since you all asked so kindly here's the fluff from my last hc 🫶🏾 :

cw: slightly suggestive but nothing nsfw. that's all :D

"why's it looking at me like that?"

the two of you are in bed and with his weight pinning you down, you find it hard to concentrate on what he means.

your head's all fuzzy with the way he's been drowning you in kisses. he kisses you like it might be his last chance to do so: sweet, languid until they melt into something more feral. the way his costume hugs his body doesn't exactly help your concentration, either.

your body's warm as it soaks up his body heat - he's like a fucking furnace - and it yearns. . no. . demands for his attention. you ignore him, making a soft, impatient sound that sounds more like a whine as you try to guide his lips back onto yours.

however, he keeps his head turned to your right, staring at a spot on your bed and says, "what're you lookin' at, huh?"

you pull back, confused, then follow his line of vision.

finally, you see what he sees: a stuffed animal perched against your pillow.

you watch as mark squints at the toy, then, tilts his head and scoffs in indignation as if it's just hurled an insult his way.

"what'd you say?" mark sits up and away from you, puffing out his chest.

the plushie stares at mark with big, black, empty eyes.

you stare up at mark, confused, as he carries on his one sided beef with your plushie.

"they cuddle you while im not here?"

mark crawls over to your plushie and grabs it by its soft neck, his fingers wrapping around the entirety. he pulls it close, putting his nose right up against the toy's. "you wanna say that again, tough guy? don't you know who i am?"

"mark, what're you doing -" you giggle, leaning back on your elbows to watch the ridiculous display before he shushes you.

"hey, you stay out of this. i'll deal with you later." he snaps before turning his attention back to the toy. "oh, you don't care? well, let's see if you care about this -"

mark suddenly shoves the toy into his face.

he flops down atop your bed, wildly flailing with one hand while the other mushes the plushie against his face. he's comically good at it, too, looking like he's being mauled by some feral cat.

he's only emboldened by your uncontrollable laughter: grunting with effort as he rolls over the stuffy and delivers a few blows. even making his own sound effects before he rolls onto his back, your toy gaining the upper hand once again.

this time, he sits the toy atop his face and flails like he's being suffocated. eventually, his body falls limp. the hand that isn't holding the toy upright falling limply at the side of your bed.

your plushie's fought dirty and won.

"i dunno, mark," you manage to say between hiccuping laughs, "you seem pretty vincible to me."

"very funny." comes his muffled voice from beneath the toy. he sits up, stuffy still in hand as he fixes you with an accusatory glare. "laugh. yeah, laugh, while your boyfriend's being mercilessly beaten."

he crawls closer and he thrusts the toy in your direction, waving it side to side by the back of the neck, holding it at arm's length like he's afraid it'll attack him. "i guess you want him now, don't you?"

you raise a brow. "don't misgender my plushies, grayson."

mark retracts the plushie and flips it upside down, looking at its bottom. "oh, right."

you let out a chortle of laughter and he's on you in seconds: pinning you down and smushing the plushie against your face, making kissy sounds while you breathlessly beg him to stop.

[leviraaaaaa]

“Levi!”

You barge through the door, all dramatic, gasping and panting, purposely exaggerating to get his attention. But not to your surprise, he didn’t even bother looking up.

“I suppose no one ever taught you, but there’s a concept called knocking.” He said, his eyes fully focused on the papers. His hand moving across it as he wrote. “It’s quite easy really, you raise your hand and—”

“Levi!” You cut him off, slamming the door behind you loudly. “Levi, my beloved, my savior in dark times, I am in need of your help.”

“Slamming the door isn’t very polite either. Your manners get worse everyday.”

You waved him off, shushing him. You made way across the room, where a couch sat not far from the desk he was sitting on, and flopped down face first. “Levi.” Your voice came out muffled.

“Ah yes, making yourself home I see.” He sighs.

“Levi, I need your help. Real bad.”

“No.”

“What–” You look up, raising your face from the cushions, offended. “You didn’t even–”

“No.” He repeated, eyes not leaving his work for even a second. “Please, get off my couch. Cleaning it is tiresome.”

“Levi.” You whined, impatient at his aloofness. “Levi, he’s going to kill me.”

“I’ll buy you a good coffin.”

“This isn’t funny.” You huffed. “I’m dead. Like literally. Absolutely. This is where it all ends.”

“I’d rather you not die on my couch.”

“Fuck your couch.” You flipped yourself, so you splayed on your back now. You tilted your head, staring at him. “Help me out. Please?”

Levi finally turns to look at you, unable to ignore you any longer. He frowned. “What?” He asked warily. “What did you do this time?”

“Promise me you’ll help me first.” You said.

“No.” He immediately rejects you. “What did you do? Did you get into a fight with an MP again?”

You shook your head.

“Blew up something in Hange’s lab?” He guessed.

“No. But I’d really rather it was Hange mad at me though.”

He looked at you confused, “Who did you piss off then? “

You grimaced. He was quick to conclude.

“Ah.” He realizes. “Erwin.”

A nod from you answers him.

“What did you do?”

“Ask me what I didn’t do.”

“What didn’t you do?”

“Work.” You sat up. “In my defense, it was a shit load of work. And I hate paperwork. And I kept procrastinating. And now it’s due by tomorrow and I didn’t remember until two minutes ago when Erwin shot a glare at me. And now I—”

“I’m not helping you.”

“Why not?” You demanded.

“It’s your fault. Don’t drag me into this shit.” He grumbles, scowling. “And you promised last time, you wouldn’t do this anymore. I’m not doing your work for you. I have enough on my plate.”

“Okay first of all, I’m not lazy. I was busy–”

“Ogling Garrison captains.”

“They’re pretty. And no, not the point, shut up.” You protested. “I was busy. And I didn’t come here so you could do it for me. I came here so you could go and talk to Erwin.”

Levi frowned, “Talk to him about what?”

“Tell him to give me one more day. Swear I’d work my ass off.”

“You said that last time too.” He pointed it out. “How angry is Erwin?”

You made a face. “Bad.”

“How bad?”

“He keeps glaring at me everytime I meet him. It’s the ‘if you don’t get it done this time, you’re gonna get in so much shit’ glare. It’s creeping me out.”

Levi scoffs, shaking his head. “Only you." He said. "Only you can possibly manage piss fucking Erwin off. The guy's a fucking monk, nothing affects him.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “If I had to guess, I’d say this isn’t the first time asking for an extension.”

“Err…” You ducked your face. “It was kinda supposed to be done 2 weeks ago.”

“2 weeks?” Levo looked at you incredulously. “No wonder he’s pissed. And you’re asking for more time?”

“One more day. Just one more day. Please Levi, he’ll listen to you.”

Levi stares at your pleading expression for a few seconds with narrowed eyes, considering. Thinking. Then he seemed to have made up his mind.

“No.”

“Wha—” You jerk upright. You really thought you’d convinced him.

“No. I’m not getting you out of the grave this time. Specially since you dug it yourself.” He returns his attention back to his work. “Good luck to you, but leave now. And learn a damn lesson.”

You stared at him, gaping. “Wow," You blinked you’re an asshole.”

“Congratulations for realizing that.”

You exhaled. Easy words won’t work, you knew. So, here comes plan A. Acting.

You pouted.

“Don’t look at me like that. I said what I said.”

You fluttered your lashes, all wide shiny eyes, about to cry.

“Get out before I start throwing shit at you.”

“Levi.” Plan B. Bribing.

“No.”

“Leeviii.”

“No.”

“Levi, aren’t you the sweetest, most dearest, my absolute favorite and delightful and super awesome with extra sugar on top bestiest best friend? Don’t be like that, c’mon.”

“Still no. And we’re not friends.”

“‘I’ll make you pie?” You offered.

“You can’t cook to save your life. No.”

"I'll give you hugs."

"I will slap you."

“Levi.” Plan C. Threatening.

He glares back at you.

"You do realize you could've used this time getting the report started instead of trying to convince me and actually might've manage to get it done?”

“I’ll read poetry to you.” You threatened.

Levi looks up, finally there’s a hint of alarm on his face. “No, you won’t.”

“I’ll make sure all your food touch.”

“Get out.”

“I’ll disorganize your bookshelf and fill it with those titan x scout love novels.”

He raised his middle finger at you.

“I will start telling you about all my exes.”

He cringed visibly.

Finally, you gave up. Dragging yourself off the couch, you slowly, pathetically, miserably made your way to the door. You knew that the odds were very low that Levi would actually help you this time, because he was right. You needed to learn a lesson. And it was your fault.

“Oi.”

Your hand was on the doorknob. “What?” You turned to look at him grumpily.

Levi was pinching the bridge of his nose, knitting his eyebrows together, irritated and annoyed. Like he was about to do something he regretted.

He let out a long exhale.

“Bring it here. I’ll help you.”

“What?” You asked, disbelief dripping from your tone. Were you dreaming?

“I’ll help you out. Just this time.” He grunts. “Don’t expect it again. And I’ll only guide you, you’re doing the most of it.”

Music to your ears.

“Really?”

“Go before I change my mind.” He huffed.

You broke into a wide grin, beaming up at him. “No wonder I love you.”

“The feeling is not mutual.”

“You’re the best,”

“Shut up.”

“The best. The most darling, the loveliest, the coolest, the–”

“10 seconds. I’m giving you 10 seconds.”

“Oh–” Your eyes widened. You learnt the hard way Levi usually means his time limits. “Okay, okay, wait here, wait. I’ll be right back. Just–”

And you were out the door,

“Fucking idiot.” He groaned to himself, as you yet again, slammed the door.

He wish he knew why he kept doing this to himself.

[takes1]

final part asahi x feral reader w/ a size k!nk

skip the intro if you want again, (i marked the beginning of actual smut for ease of navigating) couldn't resist adding some kuroo stuff bc i love writing him even if its not sexual/thirst. this has turned a bit more into porn with plot forgive me i'm simple

warnings. heavy nsfw. minors DNI

info. nsfw / soft+rough kissy missionary sex / mentions of personal restraint / multiple orgasms / mentions of masturbation / gentle giant!asahi / asahi keeping your mouth shut / mutual size kink / sweet asahi / dacryphilia if you squint / sex toys (vibrator) / kuroo's sister!reader / kuroo cockblocking / kuroo being protective / 3.6k words / thanks for reading this asahi series!! it's been a delight!

haikyuu collection. more hq here! part one here. part two here. part three here.

more links. my ao3. masterlist. requests open!

You chose some giant clothes to cover the fact that you weren't wearing anything underneath.

Then, with your security chair out of the way, you quietly slipped into the hall.

The familiar sound of Helldivers 2 on the entertainment speakers assaulted your ears. Of course, he got to invite friends over for the weekend.

You padded downstairs, the ache between your legs nearly unmanageable. You clenched your fists at the sight of his lazy ass as you walked behind the couch to get to the front door.

It was funny how quickly he zapped all desire from your body. You did not enjoy sobering up so quickly.

"I thought you said you were staying home!" Tetsurou called as soon as you grabbed the leash off of the rack.

You nearly pulled a muscle rolling your eyes so far back. You shook the thing violently from the doorway so he'd get it through his thick skull that you were literally doing what he texted you to do.

A couple voices muttered something, but your brother spoke volumes above it--

"Wait two seconds, shit-head!"

You clipped the hook into your dog's collar. To Hell with whatever he wanted. You unlocked the door and slipped on a pair of giant, black crocs.

That garbage pile gave you enough grief about your no-plans-plan in the past 12 hours to deserve being stranded on a barrel in the middle of the ocean. He could handle playing games with his friends while you went to walk the dog.

"C'mon, baby," You cooed and closed the door behind you.

It was, thankfully, nice and cold outside. You were glad you opted for some warm clothes.

"Where are my shoes?!" He yelled through the crack in the door. Almost to the end of the driveway, you didn't figure he had the gumption to follow you without them.

You pushed your hood up and pulled the strings.

A stop at the other side of the gate, and you waited for Maru to finish pissing in order to continue the walk. The big, empty street looked a little creepy in the dark.

flip!-flip!-flip!-flip!-flip!

You were glad to not be alone, but still threw your head back when he rounded the corner. His hands were shoved into his basketball shorts and he was shivering.

You both looked down to each other's feet at the same time. He had to put on your flip-flops, so his heels were hanging out the back and his grippers were on the pavement.

A silent exchange went down, one shoe at a time.

Now walking again, you returned to your baseline agitation.

"I don't need a bodyguard to walk the dog."

"Try being a little less stupid, and I'll trust you to not run off with the first guy you see."

You stopped dead in your tracks. "You think this is me sneaking out?"

He didn't respond quickly enough.

You kept walking, glad he was so cold that his teeth were chattering, "You're an idiot--."

He pushed you, unable or unwilling to argue.

"Why would I sneak out with the dog?" You muttered.

Another stop for Maru. It was silent, again, and you were wishing he would just go back by himself already.

"What's that smell?" He sounded ridiculously close to your head.

You looked up and realized that was because he was sniffing your hood. A sudden insecurity of smelling like sex flashed through you.

Pushing hard on his chest, you declared, "Fuck off."

It didn't send him flying the way you wanted it to. It only pissed him off, especially because he knew that smell from somewhere. He just couldn't recall exactly how right now.

You expected him to push or slap you back, so you tensed, but no such move was made.

"One day you'll thank me," He muttered with a grumpy chuckle.

A glance didn't do you any good. It was too dark to see his face.

"For what?" You rolled your eyes again.

It was quiet for so long that you were certain he had just been joking. As if he did anything to help you out, anyway. All he did was piss you off and get in your way.

"For making sure you don't get hurt."

Frustration on the tip of your tongue, you began to retort, "I--," but fell short of the will to say anything back for a minute.

Your glancing around in the dark didn't help you form any thoughts.

Maybe Asahi being so kind was just luck. Not the wise intuition you claimed to be guided by. There were already many times tonight that could've made a turn for the worse, and you hadn't realized until after the fact.

That didn't change how you felt, though, other than some newfound patience for Tetsurou's difficult, demanding nature.

Maru didn't want to go much further than the fifth lamp post, so your small party turned around before you could cross the street.

It was quiet on the way back. Just the jingle of your dog's collar and the flip-flip of these shoes you hated.

You rounded the corner and closed the gate behind you, Tetsurou opting to walk ahead since it was evident to him that there was no danger anymore.

It was just getting to be a comfortable silence when he had to speak up one last time.

"Has this tree always been sideways?"

You genuinely thought it was a joke, so you didn't spare a look when you crossed behind him to get inside. He caught you shoulder the way you hated so much and you swiped your hand to hit him, but saw what he was talking about and froze.

The both of you took a moment, dumbfounded, to stare at your lawn tree. It looked nearly snapped, like a hurricane had come through, but it hadn't rained in weeks. Nothing else was wrecked. Just the tree.

You felt guilty about it for just a second, but rationalized that it had nothing to do with you. You weren't sure what that was from.

"Maybe it was rotted from the inside?" You thought out loud.

He glanced around, suspicion at its full peak, and guided you inside swiftly by your upper back.

Tetsurou locked the door behind you and stayed stock-still, staring through the peephole for so long you didn't bother saying anything to him before heading back upstairs.

At your door, you heard him call to Kenma and Bokuto.

"Did one of you kick that tree in the yard?"

You collapsed against the door with a soft shut and an even softer sigh.

There was no time to deconstruct everything that was discussed, because your eyes followed a sound that nearly made you jump out of your skin.

The man took up so much of your bed. He was on his back, scarred knuckles brushed slowly up and down, a casual pump to quell his impatient cock.

His hand fit much better around it than yours. In his other hand, held closer to his face, he was clicking a small device- the familiar buzz of which inspired a complete takeover of tension between your legs.

Your embarrassment was no secret, and neither was his curiosity.

"I'd love to use this," He grinned and looked you up and down, undressing you with his eyes.

It took some effort to find the lock on the door and make your shaky way over to the bed. Like last time, he met you at the side.

However, you noticed that before you left, he didn't have the same edge in his brow, or the eagerness that defined the way he pulled you into him.

When you stumbled, he caught you and tilted your head for a restless kiss. He was shoving his hands under the waistband of your pants and humming a sort of approval against your cool lips. It sent your stomach back into those fluttery waves of excitement all over again.

"You should take your clothes off," He muttered, fully immersed in his desire since he never had to sober off of it.

"Yeah- I should," You breathed against his rough, needy lips.

You were slipping back in quickly, though, when he took your lips in a chaste, passionate kiss all over again. His hands were slipping over your skin, discarding your hoodie before you could do it yourself.

His whole body was warm, it felt like he was burning through you when you stepped out of your pants and fell against his front. Like a melting ice cube.

When he picked you up this time and set you down, it was less premeditated, more animalistic. You gave a giggling smile when he parted your legs for him.

Any shyness he had before was long-gone after 10 minutes of imagining what he was going to do to you- you squirmed at his spit-slick fingers slipping over your soaking cunt.

"Still so wet for me," He muttered, pleased, into your hair, while his massive body settled over you.

That intense, near-evolutionary drive kicked in again where you believed you could take whatever he wanted to give you all night. It may have been the smell of his sweat, it may have been his grumbly voice.

"Obviously," You smirked. He grinned at your confidence.

"We can take this slow," He rolled a condom on without wasting any extra time, "I don't wanna hurt you."

The statement floored you for a moment. He didn't notice as he lined himself up with your tightness.

It echoed in your brain during the most contradictory part possible.

He sank into you- it wasn't easy, but after hours of build-up -more if you counted the self-pleasure you couldn't resist before he arrived- it was beyond rewarding to watch all of the stress and worry on his brow melt away in one smooth, slow stroke.

"Fuck- fuck, fuck," You whined, his grasp on your hip reassuring, but still a pen in which you couldn't wriggle from or adjust against, "God-!"

Your thighs twitched on either side of him, forcibly relaxed- you tried to catch your breath, but felt like your lungs were too constricted to do so.

His thumb brushed your cheek.

Patience and gentleness in the midst of it all allowed you to breathe a little easier.

Only kindness, with a hint of pity, remained in his expression as you gasped and struggled to ease up around his cock.

He looked away for a moment, his hand leaving the side of your face, and you heard a saving grace.

Asahi did you the liberty of placing it against your clit. His face lit up at the sight and sound of your newfound gratification.

"I bet that feels better, huh?" He smiled against your parted lips, stealing a few of your moans with an excited kiss.

There was a hard-to-pin inquisitiveness about his attitude surrounding your vibrator. Like he was dying to use it on you, feel you writhe around his still cock.

"Ohh my god-! Ah-Mn!" You cried against his lips.

It was met with chuckle and the slow pump of his hips sinking deeper into you.

It dulled the discomfort of his size, leaving only a feeling of fullness between your legs, a satisfied craving, and the intense waves of pleasure from your clit.

His pretty face and perfect body over you- how could you not just announce your paradise to everyone in the city?

One hand laced in yours, and you took control of your vibrator to swirl it the way you preferred while he picked up his leisurely pace.

He barely caught your high-pitched tone at the combination with an alarmed kiss.

Stalling, he warned, "You gotta be quiet," and leaned to press further kisses against your neck.

He quickly learned that you weren't going to stay that way for him, even if his balls were allegedly on the line.

The feeling of him going deeper, your thighs bouncing from his weight that shifted your entire body, and the building waves over your clit.

"Asahi," Came out in a needy moan.

"Shhh," He cooed, gripping the bottom half of your face to get your focus on him.

The beat of his thighs against the back of yours stole your attention instead- you squeezed against his palm with furrowed brows.

Another noisy cry at his size splitting through you, and he instinctively covered your mouth to shut you up.

He thrust hard into you and stayed there, earning a pitiful whimper, and leaned in close to catch your avoidant eyes.

A mutter against your heated skin, "Do I need to keep you quiet?"

His cock was stretching you beyond your limits- that steely look in his pretty brown eyes was so layered.

You clenched around him, butterflies attacking you now, of all times, at his stern tone, but genuine concern.

A gorgeous smile spread across his features when you nodded, helpless, but honest.

He felt too good- he filled you up better than you had imagined. You were stunned to feel that you were already close. There was just no possible way.

This wasn't how you wanted it to go.

It was too soon- you didn't want it to be over so quickly. But now, of course, you realized you didn't have the physical capacity to take him all night.

You tried moving the overwhelming buzz away from your needy clit, but met the resistance of his hand instead.

He pressed just enough to guide you right to an edge you couldn't pull back from. You whimpered against his palm.

You couldn't tell him you were about to cum. You couldn't move away, or speak, nor did you possess the will to push against him. All you did was claw, weak, across his back.

The look in his eyes responded to your subtle panic-pleasure without a word. A gentle fondness that he shouldn't have been capable of while he gave you his rougher strokes.

He removed his hand from your mouth just to swallow your sounds with a starved kiss, an avid grumble at the back of his throat when you took his tongue so well.

"Mm-!" You squeaked, nails digging deep red trenches into his shoulder.

It was an ultimate submission you never had the insurance to safely experience before.

You got the chance for a gasp before getting cut off -half a second before you could alert the entire house- by his huge palm again.

Asahi groaned as you tightened around him. He quickly shut himself up by flexing away the pleasure and leaning down to pant, warm breath spilling against your ear.

"Shh- I got you," His kindhearted whisper strung you along, crushing you underneath his weight, while he repeated that sweet promise, "I got you, baby."

All your worry of it being too soon dissipated as your orgasm wracked through your entire body and filled you with pure bliss. He fucked you hard and steady through it and didn't even grant you the dignity of looking away from him.

Your chest was tight at the end of it, eyes stinging, and you would've sobbed if he wasn't still keeping you quiet.

He watched your journey the whole time through your eyes, wholly captivated by your big, glossy fixation on him. When you blinked away the burn, he took no time to kiss them away.

Your body naturally relaxed, a twitchy and overstimulating process.

He slowed for you after he sucked the rest of your complicated tears up.

He was so heavy, so adamant on keeping your noise down that you couldn't tell him to stop. You weren't sure that you would try, even if he wasn't hindering your communication. The fact that you trusted him so much right now wasn't necessarily wise, but it felt right.

His growing intensity didn't hurt, but it didn't start to feel good until a raspy voice told you:

"Feels so good," He swallowed the spit gathered in his mouth and seethed, a light chuckle breezing past his lips, "You got no fuckin' clue."

That was just kind of sinful confession that gave you nervous chills even though he was already fucking you senseless.

He studied how your eyes clouded over at his words. A restrained, toothy smile nudged your jaw in a sugary kiss.

"I'm not gonna be able to get enough of you," He finally took his hand off of your lips and you were able to gasp at the impact of his words.

When he readjusted, he swept your legs up to his shoulders and dipped back down.

"A-Ah!" You barely choked out before he moved his hand back to its diligent place over your loud mouth.

He was so deep- you felt like he'd split right through you. Yet, you welcomed the possibility with the blessing of another steady-growing climax.

Yet, only one of you was so careless. He was so tender, so considerate because he could feel it, too. How fragile you really were in this position in regards to his size.

"God," He sighed at your loving stare.

"Gonna- ah, make me cum, lookin' at me like that," He groaned, a bit strained.

He finally dipped his head with closed eyes at the sweet, slick heat he just wanted to bury himself in. He couldn't get too carried away, now that it was starting to get difficult.

Your shitty stamina stroked his ego so much that he forgot he wouldn't be too far behind for a while. He got a bit ahead of himself and was paying for it with the climbing pressure in his stomach.

Your pussy was reason enough to fuck you harder, but that face was what really tested him.

His hand twitched at the compelling desire to hear you scream for him, but again, had to keep his sanity for the two of you. Next time he would make sure that brother of yours wouldn't be in the way.

He tried to keep an edge going, but found it laughably difficult to settle down.

If it wasn't your Fuck-me-harder eyes building up the needing to cum, it was your cute tits squished against your soft, scratched-up thighs, right under his chest.

It was impossible to keep himself from riding that high in the end.

As if to spite him, to completely spend all of his restraint, your watery eyes rolled back again. Your muffled whines filled his ears as you tightened once more around him, weaker this time but still more than enough to send him over the edge.

"G-od,fu-ck," He groaned, hitting just the right spot to fuck out both of your orgasms.

You felt him swell inside of you, his grip on your hand crushed yours back to the point that you couldn't claw him, his hips stuttered to a slow stop, deep inside of you.

A sense of satisfaction beyond the physical softened your face, your resistance between his fingers, and all your aching muscles. You weren't quite sure what it was, but didn't feel rushed to figure it out.

He was trembling when he released the lower half of your face, a beautiful sweaty and out of breath mess on top of you.

Once again, you gasped at the opportunity to breathe better.

He tensed up immediately and you flinched at the twitch of his cock inside of you.

"Shit- was I choking you?" He managed to stay worried right after he came.

You grinned, carefree on the backend of your own, and shook your head, "Mm-mm."

The look of unmatched relief that washed over him was supremely attractive.

He pulled himself out, slowly, and made a face at how much he came before turning to discard the tied-up thing into the trash with a solid toss.

You welcomed his cuddly shuffle up to your side by burrowing into his slippery chest, and sighed at last, "Cute butt."

That, of all things, made him uncomfortable. He cringed when you spared a glance up to his face from his chin. You rolled your eyes at his overthinking.

"You must be an athlete, or something--," You rubbed your face harder into his chest and felt his laugh resonate throughout your body.

It all felt natural. The joking, the cuddling, the winding down. You both forgot that you weren't together, let alone that you had only known each other for less than a week.

It was already warm with him next to you, but you were happy to be under the soft throw he found and pulled over.

"I can't believe you came twice," His soft laugh invited an embarrassed, but sharp look from you.

He clarified, "It's really hot, don't get me wrong--,"

"I'm not usually so easy," You half-joked.

A big, handsome guy that knew how to use his dick, went down on you, listened to you, and didn't shy away from a vibrator? It'd be a challenge to find a girl who wouldn't cum that quick.

You blushed under the cover of darkness at his gentle, comforting hold on your breast and reassuring kiss to the side of your neck.

The ache in your belly was evident when you were flipped over to be little spoon. It burned pretty bad and you couldn't exactly hide it.

"Did I hurt you--?"

"No," You muttered, clearing your throat, "No, I wouldn't say that."

He placed a big hand on your tummy, feather-light, and you looked over your shoulder to meet his perceptive gaze.

You sure as hell couldn't lie to this guy. He saw right through you.

You pouted and gripped your pillow. Of course you couldn't handle his dick the way you wanted to, the way you bragged about or even genuinely thought you could.

"You were so good," You admitted, a little sad in tone.

A warm kiss to the back of your head. He took the weight of his arm off of your sore body, sighing into your hair.

"You were, too."

He decided to drop the subject, since you both had strong opinions that seemed to clash.

You smiled.

You talked about a range of topics for the rest of the night. General information, first, then personal interests that turned into a long conversation about volleyball, then family history, then academics, then personality, goals, and attraction.

Soon it was 4 in the morning. You were eating popsicles from your freezer and discussing the adventure he had to get up to your window.

You both watched, trying your best to stay quiet, a minutes-long video one of his friends sent in the Karasuno volleyball group chat of him falling out of the tree outside.

A hand flew up to your mouth to silence your intense giggle-fit. You had no idea how you were going to keep something like this a secret from Tetsurou.

Before too long, the pain in your tummy was just an ache and the stranger in your bed turned into a lover overnight.

taglist:

ty for all the replies and reblogs and likes!! it means so much. it's really nice seeing all the other asahi appreciators out here!!

@valiantqueengarden @rinheartshyunlix @alpha-mommy69 @yuyunhoo @insertamazingnamehere

@kreishin

@ruu-https @kasai-https

@40unung @deluluforcarlos55 @lili-harg @beyond-your-stars @noyaskneepad

@rinheartshyunlix @vintagevict0ria @am-3-thyst

<3 u are literally asahi mvp @screamin-abt-haikyuu

masterlist.

requests open!

[todayisafridaynight]

i’ve got a villain tier list but not in terms of how good they are or whatever but just in terms of how funny i think they are and mine and masato constantly fight for #1 in my brain

[arieslost]

ok i thought this would be a bit funny but lando with an aussie gf who said she’s gonna go buy some thongs and he instantly assumes she’s buying underwear but she comes back with flip flops while he was expecting something waaaay better

no bc this would actually be hysterical. i can see her saying that to him, knowing what he thinks she means when she says thongs, and just laughing to herself as she leaves the apartment. now he’s sitting around rubbing his hands together in excitement, thinking about all the possible outcomes of the evening. he’s picturing her in the store, perusing all the options, the material, the colors, considering which ones he might like the most. meanwhile she’s in the middle of a shoe store scrutinizing their flip flop selection.

cut to when she gets home. he’s practically bouncing off the walls, asking her to show him what she got. again, she knows exactly what’s bouncing around in his head, so she goes, “want me to put on a little fashion show for you?” to which he instantly responds with a yes.

she goes into their bedroom, he’s all giddy on the couch, sitting right on the edge with barely contained excitement, just for her to walk out in the same clothes she was wearing when she got home. he’s frowning, going, “babe, i thought you said you were getting thongs.”

she frowns right back. “i did? hello?” and holds up a foot which is sporting her brand new pair of flip flops.

lando’s jaw is on the floor. and not at all in the way he was expecting it to be. “those are the thongs you were talking about?!”

“yeah, and i got, like, three more pairs. just wait, i’ll be right back!”

maybe she buys underwear to make up for it. maybe she doesn’t. it’s a little too funny seeing the look of absolute confusion on his face.

[swiftiethatlovesf1]

Losing his cool

Heyy guyss, I hope you enjoy this reader x Lewis one shot :)

If you want to read more stories of mine here's my masterlist.

The sun was shining high over the paddock, casting a warm glow over the Mercedes motorhome. You loved coming to the races whenever you could, always excited to support George, your younger brother, but also to soak in the electric atmosphere of the track.

Today, though, you were enjoying a rare moment of quiet, sitting comfortably on one of the sofas in the motorhome, your oversized sunglasses perched on your nose and your outfit, as always, effortlessly stylish.

As you scrolled through your phone, you felt a soft nudge against your leg. Glancing down, you saw Roscoe, looking up at you with those big, round eyes, his tail wagging with excitement.

"Well, hello there, handsome," you said with a smile, bending down to give him a scratch behind the ears. Roscoe flopped down at your feet, clearly in the mood for attention, and nudged a toy toward you. With a chuckle, you picked it up and started a gentle game of tug-of-war. His playful growls filled the motorhome, and you found yourself laughing as you pulled the toy from side to side, completely engrossed in the moment.

Lewis’s Perspective

Lewis walked out of a debriefing, looking forward to taking a breather in the motorhome. But as soon as he stepped out into the paddock, he noticed something — Roscoe was nowhere to be found. He furrowed his brow, scanning the area, wondering where his adventurous pup had wandered off to.

“Where’s Roscoe?” he mumbled, heading toward the motorhome. As soon as he stepped inside, his heart did a quick flip.

There you were — George’s older sister, casually lounging on the sofa, your smile lighting up the room as you played with Roscoe. He stood there for a moment, frozen.

From the first time Lewis had met you, you had an effect on him. You were effortlessly stylish, funny, and kind. Since that moment, he’d developed a quiet crush on you. The only problem? Whenever you were around, his confidence seemed to vanish.

Roscoe, sensing his presence, bounded over to him, wagging his tail.

“Oh, there you are,” you said, looking up with a grin. “I was starting to think I’d have to keep Roscoe for myself.”

Lewis chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, he’s good at wandering off. Sorry about that."

"No need to apologize," you replied, giving Roscoe one last pat before sitting up. "He’s great company."

Lewis felt the heat rise to his face, trying to hide how flustered he was. "He’s... yeah, he’s a good boy."

You smiled, tilting your head slightly. "So, what about you? How’ve you been? George told me you're are getting into music again, what’s on your playlist these days?"

The sudden switch in conversation threw him off guard. "Uh, playlist?" He cleared his throat, his mind racing to come up with an answer. "I’ve been listening to a lot of old-school hip-hop lately. Kendrick Lamar, a bit of J. Cole. Stuff like that."

Your eyes lit up with interest. "Kendrick, huh? Didn’t take you for a hip-hop fan. I like that." You leaned in slightly. "I’ve been obsessed with Sabrina Carpenter lately, especially her new album,."

Lewis grinned, feeling a bit more comfortable. "Sabrina is great. I'm not into pop music but I do like her songs, besides, I've heard that her live shows are insane, too."

You nodded, your gaze locked on his. "I bet. I’ve been dying to see her live. Maybe we should go to a concert sometime."

He froze at your words, his mind momentarily blank. Did you just suggest going to a concert together? He quickly tried to play it off casually. "Yeah, that could be fun."

You leaned back with a teasing smirk. "Could be?"

Lewis laughed awkwardly, his nerves creeping back in. "I mean, it would be fun. Definitely."

"That’s more like it." You gave him a playful wink, and Lewis couldn’t help but smile, though his heart was racing.

You tilted your head slightly, your expression softening. "So, how’s your break been? Any big plans?"

Lewis shifted, trying to keep his cool. "It’s been good. Spent some time hiking in Colorado with Roscoe. It was nice to get away from everything for a bit, you know?"

"Colorado sounds amazing," you said, your eyes lighting up. "I’ve always wanted to go hiking out there. Maybe you can show me around sometime?"

Lewis blinked, his heart skipping a beat. He hadn’t expected you to be so direct. "Uh, yeah, sure. I mean, if you’re ever out there…"

You smiled, clearly amused by his nervousness. "I’ll hold you to that."

As the conversation continued, Lewis found himself relaxing more, enjoying your company as you chatted about music, travel, and everything in between. But when the conversation lulled, you stood up, brushing a hand through Roscoe’s fur one last time.

"Well, it was nice catching up with you," you said, smiling warmly at him. "And since you’ve been dodging the question all afternoon… how about I make it easy for you?"

Lewis blinked, confused. "Question? What question?"

You laughed softly, stepping closer. "I know you’re not going to ask me out, so... how about I ask you instead?" Your tone was playful, but your eyes held his steadily. "What do you say, Lewis? Dinner next weekend?"

Lewis’s heart nearly stopped. He hadn’t seen that coming at all. His mind raced, trying to process the fact that you had just asked him out. "You... want to go out with me?"

You grinned, shaking your head at his surprise. "Yes, Lewis. I want to go out with you. What do you think?"

His nerves suddenly melted away, replaced by a wave of excitement. "I’d love that," he said, his voice a bit more confident now.

"Good," you said, giving him one last playful smile before turning to leave. "I’ll text you."

As you walked away, Lewis stood there, dumbfounded but grinning from ear to ear. Roscoe barked softly, as if to say, It’s about time.

Lewis shook his head, still in disbelief. "Yeah, Roscoe," he muttered, glancing down at his dog. "It’s about time."

[megamindsupremacy]

my very important and well-thought-out thoughts about the shipping options within the Bill-Stanford-Fiddleford-Stanley love square

Billford - The classic. Toxic old man yaoi. Pre-portal Stanford is well and truly completely religiously obsessed with Bill, who is just using him like a mildly interesting pawn. The second Ford goes flying through that portal, Bill realizes how badly he fucked up and spends 30 years obsessed with getting his situationship back but by this point Ford is OVER it. Basically they flip-flop who is maniacally unhealthily obsessed with the other at any given time and it's a horrible experience for everyone involved

Fiddauthor/Ford^2 (pre-portal) - Toxic young man yuri. Fiddleford is desperately pining for Ford but Ford is too up his own ass (and obsessed with Bill) to notice.

Fiddauthor/Ford^2 (post-portal) - The happiest slash healthiest (?) option on the list. Ford has gotten his shit together and his head out of his ass, as well as several dozen reality checks and a fist to the face (he needed... all of that to fix him). Fiddleford has more or less recovered from wiping his own memory due to the Horrors he experiences while working with Ford. They are able to happily settle down and build giant robots to harass small children with in their free time.

Fiddlestan - I will accept this ship ONLY with identity and memory-wiping angst. I want neither of them to be happy about it. Fiddleford either thinks Ford is finally returning his feelings and refuses to examine "why the hell is he acting so different (nice)" further, or he's well aware that this man who looks like Ford isn't Ford, and is willing to turn a blind eye just to Feel Something. Stan thinks Fidds is his brother's boyfriend and he has to maintain this relationship for the dude's sake, and also this is the first true affection he's experienced in a decade so he's keeping his mouth shut about the identity stuff just, again, to Feel Something.

Billfiddlesford - funny as hell and i refuse to accept any other ship name. Everyone is having a great terrible fun time except they're all having a wildly confusing time. Bill is fully aware of Fiddleford's feelings for Ford and is trying to manipulate Fidds with them. It's working but only kinda because Bill is starting to experience this strange emotion called Jealousy. Ford is caught in the crossfire of being obsessed with this triangle thing but the triangle is lowkey putting their portal-building plans on hold just so he can figure out what is WRONG with these two scientist freaks. And himself. Ford kisses Fiddleford first and Fiddleford's first reaction is "Bill why did you do that" then he has to explain why his first instinct, upon being kissed by Ford, is to assume Ford is being possessed by his Triangle Muse God. I dearly love this ship because there is no possible way it could happen in canon but I need to throw these three in a room together and shake it just to see what would happen.

[worksby-d]

Tangled up with you all night

Pairing: Ari Levinson x escort!Reader x Steve Rogers

Summary: Your favorite client has a surprise for you on Valentine's Day.

Warnings: AU, voyeurism, threesome, oral (f + m receiving), m masturbation, unprotected sex, fingering, anal, 18+

Word count: ~3,500

A/n: This is my first time writing more than one character in the same fic, so I hope it's readable!!! I enjoyed writing this a lot and I'm excited about it and I hate saying that cause I fear I'll jinx it and it'll flop, but I really hope you enjoy it if you give it a chance 🥹💝 Happy Valentine's Day!

You’re no stranger to the dimly lit, quiet hallway. The walls have echoed the sound of your heels against the tile floor back to you countless times. Instructions are always the same – Let yourself in, the door is unlocked. 

Your first time here was terrifying. It was one of your first jobs and you were naive back then. Who knew there were guys so desperate for your company that they would trust you enough to just walk into their penthouses. 

You remember your hand shaking as you took a deep breath and reached for the door. It’s funny now because it couldn’t be any more different than how you confidently stride in tonight. 

Since then, this guy – Ari – has become one of your regulars. Despite what you were there for that first night, he had a way of making you feel comfortable instantly, which certainly isn’t always the case. 

“You couldn’t get anyone else to keep you company on Valentine’s Day?” Your quip carries as you walk in. The sound of ice falling into a few glasses tells you he’s behind his bar, so you follow it. “Had to settle for me?” 

“It was you or no one.” He winks as he tops off your drink, always sure to have your favorite ready for you. “You know that by now, sweetheart.”

He’s told you time and time again that you’re the only reason he keeps the agency’s business card on hand. But you’ve convinced yourself that he tells all the girls that… In an attempt to not get attached. He makes it damn hard not to though.

Taking the drink from his reached out hand, you roll your eyes. That’s when they land on another man walking into the room. 

“Oh–” You’re mid sip when you pull your glass away from your mouth, licking the small amount of alcohol off your lips. A switch flips and your professional persona is back on – Standing up straight with an innocent smile on your face. “I wasn’t expecting…”

A smirk tugs at the corner of Ari’s mouth. “Surprise.” 

It’s clear to you where this is going, but you know men are simple creatures – They like when you play dumb. So you cock your head slightly, feigning confusion. 

“This is Steve.” 

You take in the sight of him – Tall, built, sleeves rolled up showing his to-die-for forearms. It’s your lucky day, you think to yourself. What are the chances of two attractive guys spending their Valentine’s Day with you? 

You snap yourself out of ogling him, finally speaking to him. “Just ‘Steve’?” 

You’re used to no last names, but it’s fun to tease them about it. 

“For now,” he nods, mirroring your smile. 

“Then hi, Steve,” you nod, holding out your hand to shake his. 

It's his turn to let his eyes wander, but he's respectful about it, not letting his gaze linger for an uncomfortable amount of time. His eyes reach yours again and he lets go of your hand. 

He shakes his head as if he's speechless for a moment. “Even more beautiful in person.”

“A smooth talker like Ari, huh?” You giggle. 

Ari hands your drink back to you. 

You flash him a smile, not dropping the innocent act yet. “Is your friend, Steve, staying?”

“I think you know the answer to that.” Ari sees right through it. “Why don't you go get ready for us? He brought a gift for you, you gotta try it on.” 

Who are you to deny a gift? You let Ari walk you toward his bedroom door so he can have just a second alone with you. 

“As long as it's okay with you…” His voice is low and genuine. He may pay to have sex with you, but he's still a gentleman. “I thought it would be fun to try something new, but you know I never want you to do anything you don't want to–”

“It's fine,” you chuckle, bringing a hand up to pat his cheek. “I promise it's fine. He better be as good as you though.” 

With a teasing look, you open the door to step into his room and shut it again behind you before he can say fuck it and follow you in.

His bedroom is cozy. You've always thought that. He keeps it dark, allowing the glow from the city lights outside to illuminate it just enough – Just enough for the unspeakable things you ever do in here anyway. 

Your eyes drift from the windows to the bed where there's a small box with a bow tied around it. There's a tag and it's addressed to you from Steve. 

You would never ask any of these guys to their faces, but you always wonder if they know that gifts that aren't lingerie exist. Or even just different looking gift boxes to throw you off every once in a while. 

Carefully removing the bow, you open the box. You can tell by the neatly folded lace and mesh that it’s a babydoll set. Matching red panties fall from underneath the top as you hold it up to take a look.

The lace detailing across your chest leaves little to the imagination as you look at yourself in the mirror once you have it on. 

As if the two men in the other room can sense that you're ready, they walk in right as you're sitting on the edge of the bed to wait for them. 

“Hot damn,” Ari whistles when his eyes fall on you. 

So far, you can tell Steve is more reserved. He settles for a—not quite silent—but a whispered wow as he pulls the door closed behind him.

“Thanks for the gift, Steve.” 

You flash him a soft smile and bat your eyelashes, leaning back to subtly push your chest forward. It works every time. His eyes noticeably linger there before making their way back up to yours. 

Ari senses the tension between the two of you. You catch the smirk on his face—as if he’s a proud matchmaker—as he takes a few more steps to get close to you. 

The brush of his fingers against your cheek gets you to look up at him. 

“Why don’t we let you and Steve get acquainted first, hm?”

Nodding, you glance at Steve and he’s looking back at you for your approval. 

The wave of your hand tells him to come closer and Ari steps back to take a seat on the sofa that faces the bed so he can watch the two of you. 

“Sit,” you tell Steve, letting him switch places with you. 

You do a slow twirl in front of him, showing off the set he got you, sure to move just enough so the hem of the top flows up, revealing the pretty bottoms underneath.

“Does it look as good on me as you hoped it would?” He bites his lip, admiring the way it hugs your body. You can tell it’s taking everything in him not to touch you, so you lean forward to whisper in his ear, “You can touch me.”

You don’t have to tell him twice. His hands go for your hips, finger tips pressing into your skin as he pulls you to straddle his lap. 

“It looks beautiful.” His fingers trace some of the lace. “Pretty sure you would make anything look good though.”

“There you go with the smooth talking again,” you laugh. “What do you want me to call you?” Your hands come up to begin unbuttoning his shirt. “Just your name? Sir… Maybe daddy?”

You suppress your smile when you swear you feel his cock twitch beneath you. 

“What do you call Ari?” He asks, glancing over at his friend. 

Before he can answer, you put your hand on Steve’s cheek to get his eyes back on you. 

“He just has me call him Ari because he’s boring,” you joke. “I make fun of him all the time for it.”

“Got it,” he chuckles. “My name is fine too.” 

“Yawn,” you sigh, pulling his shirt off of him and tossing it to the floor. 

He raises an eyebrow at you. “What do I call you?”

“Whatever you want,” you smirk. 

Steve’s quick to once again switch places with you, laying you at the edge of the bed so he can kneel between your legs. 

Holding yourself up on your elbows, your head rolls back when he begins placing soft kisses along your inner thighs. He grins to himself, noticing the chill bumps that follow his touch as he caresses your legs. 

He pulls away slightly to get your attention and looks up at you. “May I?”

His fingers hook on the waistband of your panties and you think he’s asking if he can take them off of you. So you nod, but he’s impatient, settling on just pulling them to the side instead.

He shakes his head seeing how wet you are for him already. “Gorgeous.”

A guttural groan falls from his lips before his mouth is on your pussy. 

“Oh–” You gasp, letting your head fall back again. “God, Steve.” 

You usually have to put on a show during sessions, but never with Ari, and not with this Steve guy either. Your moans and the arch of your back is genuine as he skillfully devours your pussy. 

His tongue on your clit has your breaths becoming more shallow already. Lifting your head back up, you reach a hand down to run your fingers through his hair and give yourself leverage as you roll your hips against his face. 

He chuckles and the vibrations from his voice have your eyes falling shut. With a few more strokes of his tongue along your slit, he slowly eases off, back to pressing a few last kisses to your thighs. 

You let out a frustrated sigh. It felt too good for him to stop. He must have gotten a run down of the rules from Ari, you think to yourself. He knew not to let you come yet. 

He untangles your fingers from his hair and holds your hand to pull you back up so you’re sitting in front of him. You let your lips meet his in a slow kiss, tasting yourself on him. 

Ari clears his throat, reminding you both that he’s there. He’s rid himself of his clothes as he watched Steve warm you up. 

“Send her over here,” he says from his spot on the sofa. 

Steve breaks the kiss and gets out of the way so you can stand up. Your few steps toward Ari are done on shaky legs, practically falling into his lap once you get to him. But he stops you, holding his hands on your hips. 

“Nuh-uh.” He shakes his head. “Face Steve.” 

He helps you turn to face away from him, quickly helps you remove your panties, and guides you to sit back with your knees on either side of his thighs. 

You reach down to stroke his cock a few times. He’s hard already from watching you and Steve. 

Both of you moan out in unison as you sink down onto him. You have enough sex where you’d think it would be easy by now, but something about Ari is different. The way his cock stretches you open proves to be painful every time, but it’s a welcome pain, a pain that you crave when you’re not with him. 

“Missed this, didn’t you?” He teases. All you can do is nod pathetically. “I know you always do.” 

He helps you roll your hips, taking his cock as deep as you can. His hand slipping down, allowing his fingers to play with your clit, makes you cry out. 

He knows what he’s doing. You won’t be able to hold back much longer. And he doesn't want you to. 

“You getting shy on me?” He whispers, kissing your shoulder when you become quiet, focused on not coming yet. 

You groan, legs beginning to quiver. “You know I’m not supposed to come until you have.” 

He doesn’t let up. “Who’s gonna know?”

Your gaze shoots toward his friend on the bed who’s stroking his cock as he watches Ari fuck you. 

“Him? You can trust him. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be here.”

Your eyes clench shut as you continue to ward off your orgasm. 

“You don’t mind if she comes before us, do you?” He asks Steve. 

“God no,” he moans, keeping his eyes on the way your cunt swallows Ari’s cock. “She can come as much as she wants for all I care.”

“You heard him,” Ari whispers in your ear. His fingers press harder against your swollen clit. “Come for us, princess.”

“Ah–” Your body betrays you, easily giving in to them. 

The eruption of pleasure renders you numb, Ari having to take over to prolong your high. 

“Good fuckin’ girl.” 

Maybe he is just that strong, but it must be part adrenaline too, the way he manhandles you, keeping you bouncing on his cock when you don’t feel like you have control over your body to keep moving yourself. 

“Ari!” You cry out, unable to take anymore. You can lift up just enough to let him slip out of you. “Fuck.”

Your chest heaves as you take a few shuddering breaths. He laughs a little, but you’re too in a daze to even notice. He keeps his hands on you as support while you turn to sit beside him with your legs over his and your head against his shoulder. 

“I’ll have to start paying you at this point,” you joke. 

“Nonsense…” His hand caressing your thigh moves slowly, nestling between your legs to part them, and you don’t know if his careful movement is out of consideration of the fact he just gave you a numbing orgasm that your body is still recovering from, or if he’s doing it to tease you and keep you a mess for him. “Your pleasure is my pleasure, remember?”

Your head falls back, lips parting in a silent moan when his fingers brush against your used cunt. 

“Oh, sorry.” He frowns at you, voice laced with fake sympathy. “Are you sensitive?”

“Fuck you,” you laugh, hiding your face against his neck when it turns into a whimper. 

When he lets up, you can’t help the quiet sigh of relief that escapes you. 

“Why don’t you get on your knees for me now?”

“What about Steve?” You ask, giving him a wink before looking back to Ari with a pout.

“Greedy girl,” he chuckles. “Gonna let him have his turn fucking you?”

His hand slapping your cunt elicits a gasp from you.

All you can do is shake your head. You’re not used to being with two guys. Usually a blow job would mean a break for your poor pussy, but not tonight. 

He leans to whisper closer to your ear, “What if we let him have your ass instead then, hm?”

“What?” You’re a little taken aback. “You’re the only one I let do that.”

“Only me?” An amused smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth. He didn’t know that. “You fuck all these men and only I’ve had this pretty ass?”

You just shrug. A wave of heat washes over your skin. 

“I knew I was your favorite,” he teases. “You can trust him though. I’ll make sure he’s gentle.”

“Here,” Ari says, handing Steve a bottle of lube. 

You impatiently reach for Ari’s hand to pull him onto the bed with you. 

“I’m not goin’ anywhere.” He chuckles at the desperation, giving in to you easily. “Trust me.”

Your eyes are fixated on his hard cock as he sits in front of you, legs spread to accommodate the position you’re in on your hands and knees. Lowering your head to take him in your mouth, he stops you with a hand resting on your cheek. 

“Not yet.” 

He waits for your eyes to meet his so he knows you’re listening, and you give him a nod. 

Steve’s behind you proving your earlier assumption about him being more reserved. His hands roam your hips and your ass, reacquainting you with his touch while you grow desperate for more. You swear any other guy would damn near be coming by now instead of making you wait for it. 

A frustrated groan is at the tip of your tongue and Ari can sense it. 

“Slap her,” he tells Steve. “She likes that.”

Your eyes flutter shut when you feel the strike of his palm against your ass. And another slap elicits a soft moan from you. 

Ari doesn’t let you look away from him as Steve gets more comfortable with you, finally dripping some lube to rub against your tight hole. 

“That feel alright?” He asks, teasing you with his thumb. 

You sigh. “Yes.”

Since you can't look back, you cast your pleading eyes at Ari. 

“Oh–” You whimper, feeling him press his finger deeper. “Please.”

“Please what?” Ari can't suppress his smile. He loves fucking with you. “Tell us.”

“I…” I don’t know, you want to choke out. “Need both of you!”

“There you go,” he coos, rubbing his thumb against your cheek as he looks at Steve behind you. “Give it to her.”

Steve strokes his cock a few times before pressing the head of it against your tense hole. You suck in a breath at the feeling and he gently pats your lower back. 

“Breathe, darling.”

Ari drops his hand from your face as you let out the breath and you take that as your cue to finally touch him. 

You move your hand, resting it on his thigh. Your fingertips press against his skin as Steve pushes his cock deeper into you. 

“Oh, wow.” Your jaw trembles, dropping open in a broken moan. “That feels good. Don’t stop.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he groans. 

You pull it together to run your hand up Ari’s thigh, reaching to wrap your fingers around his cock, but he puts a hand on your wrist, halting you. 

“No hands,” he tells you. “Just that pretty mouth.”

“Why?” You have enough sense yet to poke fun at him. “You’ll come too fast?”

He scoffs, shaking his head at you, but he can’t help but smile. 

“Harder, Steve.” He presses his hand against the back of your head to bring you down to his cock and you more-than-willingly open your mouth for him. “She can clearly take it if she’s still talking to us like that.”

“Shit, I know she can,” he pants. You moan around Ari’s dick as you push your hips back against Steve. “She’s fucking back against me she’s so desperate for it.”

“Christ.” 

Ari’s head falls back. The room echoes with pleasure-filled sounds from all three of you. He keeps his hand on you as your head moves up and down, stilling you even when he feels you gag on him. 

“Rub your clit, baby. Come for us again.”

You’re determined for them to let go before you this time. You listen to Ari, slipping your hand beneath you to play with your clit as Steve fucks you harder.

Not that you need to fake your pleasure with them, but you do play it up a little bit with some louder moans, letting the hum of your voice bring Ari over the edge. 

“Fuck yes,” he groans, cock twitching as his release spills against your tongue. You gently ease off of him as you swallow what you can. He swears he could lose it again when you drop your face to lick up the rest of the mess that drips down his length and onto his skin. “There you go.”

You don’t miss a beat of continuing to tease your sensitive clit. The trembling of your legs has you clenching around Steve’s cock to keep yourself from coming yet. But as soon as you feel his hips stutter and his grip on your waist tighten to keep you in place, you let go. Your pleasure draws his out and your movements are sloppy, but you push your hips back against him again until he can’t take it anymore, reluctantly pulling out of you. 

You can’t hold in the whine you let out when you lose the feeling of being full of him. It felt too good, but they don’t keep their hands off of you long enough for you to beg for more. 

Ari knows you won’t be able to move on your own, so he helps you turn over to sit with your back against him as he holds your legs back for Steve to get between them and clean up the mess he and you made. 

“You’re a fucking dream,” he laughs, pressing kisses against your neck. 

Between the feeling of his lips and the occasional nips against your sensitive skin and the feeling of Steve taking his time, lapping at your pussy, residual jolts of pleasure course through your body. 

“You can–” You’re cut off by your own quiet moan. “Damn– Bring the rest of your friends if they’re all this good.”

You feel his smirk and you know his words are a promise. “I’ll remember that.”

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