#the fact that Sehun and Jongin both wanted to be down there so bad | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

biaswreckingfics · 4 years ago

Text

No Limits: Part 14

Author: biaswreckingfics

Genre: Mafia AU - Warnings? Everything that goes on in a mafia au

Word Count: 7.1k

Previous Chapter

Y/N's POV

Minseok was recklessly speeding back to the compound, and you were thankful that in your haste, you still remembered to put on your seatbelt. You glance over your shoulder at the backseat every time Minseok makes a sharp turn and catch Sehun trying to stop himself from slamming into the door each time. You knew if he was in the right mindset, he would've cussed Minseok out, but judging by the look on his face, he was far from it.

The shocked and fearful look that showed up on his face when he was talking to Jaesuk was still present, and you couldn't help but wonder if it was fear for himself or Jaesuk. When you had spoken to Sehun at the beach about his Baem friend, you had no indication of how close they were. It was clear to you now, however, that the two had grown closer than you realized. It didn't really hit you until you heard Jaesuk's words to Sehun before he hung up.

The Baem man telling Sehun to help EXO do whatever they needed to do, and then to end them... Then him hoping to see Sehun when this was all over... The entire conversation was unexpected; and not something you would've ever predicted to come out of a Baem member's mouth.

"Jesus christ, Minseok." Sehun grits out as he slams into the door again.

"You should've put your seatbelt on, you idiot." Minseok throws back without sympathy.

"No shit."

You watch Sehun look around like he was debating if it would be worth it to put his seatbelt on when you were already so close to the compound. In the end, he must've said screw it because he sat back with a huff and a tight grip on the door handle.

You notice Minseok glancing at you when he has a small chance to look away from the road, and it makes you nervous. After the third glance, you finally ask him why he keeps looking at you.

"I just want you to realize that once we walk through those doors, we're going to war. No more playtime or throwing around threats. We're attacking the Baem today."

You swallow nervously and let his words sink into you. This was going to be your first time seeing EXO in action... and this might be the last time you ever see some of these men who have become your family again... You shake those thoughts from your head. This is what you wanted. You wanted the Baem to pay for everything they've done and now was your chance to make sure they finally do.

You look up in time to see Minseok whip into the driveway and hear Sehun's muttered "finally" from the back. There was no time to be scared or nervous, so when Minseok throws open his door, you're quick to follow.

Sehun, on the other hand, was not. You notice him slowly getting out of the SUV while taking in the giant brick structure in front of him. He slowly closes the door behind him, and you find yourself wondering what was going through his head for the third time today. This was his first time home in months, and the first time he'll be seeing all of EXO with his memories intact.

You follow Minseok up to the front door and glance back to see Sehun slowly trailing behind you. The second Minseok opens the door, you can hear a cacophony of voices coming from the other side of it like they were all standing right at the door waiting. Which, you find out, is exactly the case.

You jump a little when you see the group of men focus on you and Minseok as you walk into the house. Your eyes immediately find Baekhyun, and he gives you a relieved smile once he sees you. His eyes quickly scanning you from head-to-toe to make sure you're okay, which is a habit you noticed he picked up months ago, any time you walked out the front door without him. A moment later, his eyes fall onto something behind you, and that's when you know he's spotted Sehun.

"No way..." Jongin breathily lets out from beside Baekhyun.

Sehun slowly steps into the house behind you and takes in all the shocked faces staring at him. The shock mostly being felt by Baekhyun, Yixing, and Jongin, who were seeing him for the first time since the warehouse.

Sehun's eyes dart around before they find the exact person he was looking for. He stares at Chanyeol, who carefully watches him through sad eyes before he takes a step toward him. Chanyeol startles at the action, and his eyes widen in confusion.

Sehun quickly closes the gap between them and pulls the slightly taller man into a tight hug. Chanyeol remains frozen as Sehun quickly begins mumbling apologies.

"I'm sorry for being gone so long... and I'm sorry for not remembering you..."

Minseok quietly informs the room that Sehun has his memories back as the rest of the men watch in confusion. Once Chanyeol hears this, his arms fly up around Sehun and pull him impossibly closer, the latter letting out a small "umph".

"He remembers us?!" Jongin asks excitedly before a sour expression takes over his face. "Good, because he pulled some shit at the warehouse that I never got to bitch at him for."

Jongdae tells him to shut up as they all patiently wait for the cousins to properly reunite. Your eyes trail over to Yixing, and you can see him slightly biting his lip while he stares at Sehun. You knew he was itching to check Sehun out, now that his memories were back, but he knew now wasn't the right time.

"As much as I'd love to celebrate Sehun coming back to us...We need to act now before the Baem does."

Junmyeon's words sobered up the room as they all remembered what needed to be done. Ripples of words echoed through the men as they talked amongst themselves about what they were going to do. The word "bombs" being thrown around enough times to catch both your and Sehun's attention. Just what the hell was their plan?

"I'm sorry about the irony of this," Junmyeon vaguely begins saying, pulling the attention of Sehun. "How this is almost exactly like the last time you were with us. Rushing out the door after the Baem, and blowing up buildings... It's almost like you didn't miss anything at all..."

"Except we're missing one important person..." Sehun quietly says before looking over toward Jongdae, "and have apparently gained some more."

You follow his line of sight and notice three guys behind Jongdae that you had never seen a day in your life. How the hell did you miss three random faces when you came in here? It was like everything you had apparently learned in your training had gone out the window. Then Sehun's words penetrate through your brain, and you realize he had brought up Kyungsoo.

"How did you end up finding out?" Chanyeol quietly asks him.

Sehun looks down at his feet like he's trying to find the right words to say. He inhales deeply before looking up at the rest of you.

"The first 'mission' the Baem sent me on was to come here and report back to them everyone who showed up to a memorial that was being held in the backyard... I didn't realize it at the time, but it was Kyungsoo's..."

Your breath catches in your throat at his admission. He was sent to spy on his own friend's funeral, and he didn't even know it. The thought made you absolutely sick to your stomach, and you knew the feeling was mutual among the rest of the men. Their face's portraying their anger and pain at the thoughts of Sehun being put in that situation.

"When my memories came back, and I had time to reflect on everything... I was able to connect some dots... and it really fucking sucked when I realized what had happened," he recalls through gritted teeth, trying to hide his sadness.

"The fact that he's..." Sehun shakes his head and takes a breath, "I haven't truly been able to process it yet... I am happy, in some twisted sort of way, that I was able to be at the memorial, though... Even if I didn't realize it was for Kyungsoo, I felt... connected to him. I remember thinking how crazy it was that both of us were in the same explosion, but only one of us made it... I just didn't realize how connected we were."

The back of your throat burns, and you blink a few times to try to relieve the stinging you were feeling in your eyes, but it doesn't help much. While Sehun was talking, the thought that Sehun didn't know what happened to Kyungsoo occurred to you. That it was Sehun's own weapon that ended up taking Kyungsoo out. You find Chanyeol's eyes as you remember him telling you Sehun would blame himself if he ever found out how Kyungsoo had died. You were starting to get dangerously close to that happening.

Sehun couldn't find out what happened that night. At least, not yet. Not when you still had something to do, so you try to get Sehun to focus on something else.

"Sehun... did you stick around after the memorial ended? Were you..."

"Watching you?" He asks, and you nod. "Yeah, that was me. I was about to leave when you came back outside. I stayed because they wanted me to gather any information I could... on all of you."

"You were the shadow man on the cameras this whole time?" Jongin asks in surprise. "Well, I guess that's one less thing we have to worry about."

It was a relief to know it had been Sehun watching you, and not some creep or enemy. Now you could put that silent question that had always been in the back of your head to rest, and get some answers to some other questions you had.

You point to the men behind Jongdae and immediately ask, "Who are they?"

Jongdae glances over his shoulder at the men behind him, and that's when you take a good look at their appearances. All three of them looked to be in their mid to late 20's, just like most of you were, but they all held a slightly more innocent look than you were used to. Not to say they were innocent because they definitely gave off some "bad boy" vibes, but besides the lip and nose piercings two of them had, they looked very plain. Black hair and black clothes like they wanted to hide from the world and not be seen.

Jongdae surprises you when he answers your abrupt question. "These are members of Kyungsoo and I's old gang... I knew we were going to need some help, and they were more than willing to offer themselves... They want revenge for Kyungsoo, just like the rest of us."

One of the men nods at Jongdae's words as another one looks at you. You meet his gaze and see curiosity in his eyes. That's when you figure that they must know Kyungsoo died while saving you. It didn't seem like he blamed you for it, but he was definitely intrigued by you.

"We'll accept any help that you can offer. How many of there are you?" Your brother asks.

"15. All more than willing to do what's necessary."

His words make you wonder if this is the first time they've gone head to head with a mafia group. If you remembered correctly, they were a part of a small gang that pushed drugs into schools and universities. They weren't dealing with selling weapons, extortion, and the more vile things these groups did.

They were willing to take that final step for Kyungsoo, but would they actually be able to do it?

"Perfect. That'll be a lot of help." Junmyeon says, snapping you to attention.

"Alright, here's the deal. We're dividing each district between two of you and each of your units. How you want to handle each district will be for you guys to figure out when you get there, but we'll have roughly a 20 minute time frame to get everything done from start to finish. Jongdae, since you have your old gang with you, you'll be getting two districts to cover. There's enough of you that you'll be able to handle it."

Jongdae nods. "That's fine. Which areas?"

"Districts 5 and 7. Baekhyun and Jongin, you have District 3, which is the closest to downtown, so you'll need to be a little more careful. Chanyeol and Sehun, will the two of you be okay to work together?"

"Absolutely." Chanyeol immediately says without hesitation.

"Okay, then you'll have District 6 along the river. Minseok and I will take District 2 on the east side."

You had been watching your brother hand out orders and assignments in a very militaristic fashion without an issue... but to hear that he was going out on this mission was a surprise to you. You thought it was important for the leader to remain safe in case everything went wrong... Why would he so willingly jump into the chaos?

"You're going out there?" Sehun asks in surprise. Apparently, he was on the same wavelength as you.

"I'm not sitting this one out." Your brother adamantly says with a shake of his head before smirking and looking over at Minseok. "It'll be just like old times."

"Where do you want us?" Yixing asks.

Your eyebrows raise at his question. There was only one other person in the room without an assignment, and it was you. Were you the other part of the "us" and if you were, why are you just now finding out about it?

"Yixing and Y/N will be in the middle of all the districts in District 4. Along with Yixing's medical unit, they'll be tending to the wounded, as well as alerting all teams of any incoming back up. They'll have a good vantage point of each area."

You swore your body was as stiff as a board while your brother spoke. You didn't know the first thing about first aid, let alone know how to do triage or whatever the hell else they did in warzones because that was exactly what this was about to be.

There were going to be innocent bystanders walking around out there, and police will probably come in and attempt to stop whatever was happening. Not to mention the EXO and Baem members that will be trying to kill each other in the middle of it all. Also, lets not forget that you didn't even know what the fuck their plan was. You were going in completely blind, and you knew that was your brother's intention.

You wanted to be involved, so he put you out there in the thick of it, but he made sure to truly keep you out of the way. You could help them, but apparently only so much. You weren't even sure if you should be angry, offended, or scared that you now possibly held their lives in your hands, and you didn't know how to do anything about it.

"Y/N, Yixing will fill you in on everything on the way there. Chanyeol, you'll have to fill Sehun in too. The rest of us know what we need to do." Junmyeon tells the room while looking at each person in the eye.

"What even is your plan?" You finally find your voice, and boy, does it sound pissed off. "What the hell are you even doing?"

"We're blowing up half the city tonight, baby girl," Jongin says with a smirk.

Baekhyun snaps his head toward the younger man when he hears the nickname that had fallen from his lips before promptly slapping him in the back of the head. "Don't call her that."

Junmyeon rolls his eyes at the two before turning to look at you. He could tell you were pissed off about being so in the dark and that you probably thought whatever their plan was, was stupid, so he tries to placate you. "Yixing will fill you in on the way."

You feel yourself grinding your teeth at your brother's response. You glare at him also, so he can truly get it through his thick skull how fucked up this was, but then you slowly nod, because what else are you supposed to do? Throw a fit? Claim you're not going because you didn't get your way? No. You were going to suck it up and deal with your anger later.

"We're doing this to show the rest of the mafia world not to fuck with us. To prove we will not be walked over, and that anything that is done to us will be returned tenfold... but we're also doing this for those the Baem have taken from us," your brother states in a strong voice. "We let them get away with too much, and that ends today."

Jongdae matches Junmyeon's stare with a steely expression. "For Kyungsoo."

"Jisoo and Minhyuk," Baekhyun adds with determination.

"Jiho..." Chanyeol says before slowly looking at his cousin. "And Sehun."

You meet your brother's stare and remember the night that started you both down the paths you were now leading. "Our parents."

Junmyeon nods and then turns to look at the rest of the men. "Tonight, this ends. We will not let a single Baem member escape. We're going to eradicate that group off the face of this planet, and by the end of the day, they will all be dead."

It would be hard for anyone to follow up the words that just poured from your brother with anger and determination, so no one bothered to try. Wordlessly, everyone started packing up their gear and whatever else they needed and headed out to their vehicles.

Since you were never told about anything that was going to happen, you awkwardly stand in the entryway, feeling like you're just in the way of everyone else rushing around. Yixing and a man you've only seen a handful of times before were carrying medical supplies out to one of the black SUVs while you debated asking him if he needed help.

Before you could decide, a hand slides into your own, and you're quickly pulled down the hallway and away from the men getting ready to risk their lives. Your eyes follow the line of the arm and eventually see the back of Baekhyun's head as he pulls you along with him.

"Baek, where are we going?"

He glances back at you with a small, borderline sad, smile. "I just need a minute..."

You allow him to pull you into the kitchen and watch as he quickly scans to make sure the two of you were alone. Once he's satisfied, he turns to you with a serious gaze that only slightly shocks you.

"Baek..." you quietly say, squeezing the hand he was still holding on to.

"I need a moment to be alone with you before... everything goes down." He reaches for your other hand and holds them both gently. "I don't know if - "

"Stop." You quickly tell him, not wanting to hear the words you know are going to come out of his mouth.

"No. We need to face reality... There's a chance... that I might not make it back from this... Hell, there's a chance you might not either. We have no idea what's going to happen today... That's why I had to be alone with you one last time... I needed to do this."

With those words, he pulls you toward him by your hands before letting them go and placing his gently on both of your cheeks. He lightly swipes his thumbs over your cheeks like he is handling the most fragile jewel in the world. His eyes search your own, and you can't tell if he's trying to find comfort or take a mental image of this moment so he'll never forget it.

He slowly leans forward, and your eyes reflexively close once you feel the slight brush of his lips on yours. He adds a little pressure to the kiss, but it still remains soft and gentle. It was a reassuring, you're-my-entire-world kiss that you will carry with you forever, but if this was the last time you would see him, you needed something more.

You wrap your hands around the back of his neck and pull him closer to you, your lips immediately pushing harder on to his. He quickly follows suit and deepens the kiss, his hands reaching down to your waist and tugging you impossibly closer.

You kiss him like this was the last time you'll ever see him. You put every amount of emotion you can into it: fear, love, desperation, hope... and you can tell in the tight way he holds you that he's doing the same. His fingers grip into your sides like he's afraid to let you go, to let this moment end, and if you're honest with yourself... you're afraid too.

Unfortunately, there was no more time for stalling, and as much as you wanted to ignore Jongin's shouts for Baekhyun, you knew you couldn't. You break the kiss but make no move to pull away. Baekhyun lets out a sigh as he rests his forehead against yours.

He reaches back up to cup your cheek and lets out a quiet, "I love you". A small smile grows on your face as you fight the tears that are attempting to escape from your eyes. "I love you too."

Baekhyun notices your watery eyes immediately and shakes his head slightly, whispering, "Please, don't cry. I'll never be able to walk away from you if you do..."

"I'm sorry..." you match his tone, "I'm just scared of what'll happen."

"I know, baby. I know." He pulls away and lightly kisses your forehead. "I'm going to fight like hell to come back to you, and you better do the same if you need to."

You nod against him as he pulls you into a tight hug. You couldn't speak at the moment because you knew if any words came out tears would be soon to follow, so you wrap your arms around his waist and hold him instead. You wish the moment could last forever, but it's abruptly interrupted when Jongin comes through the kitchen door looking for Baekhyun.

You catch him awkwardly trying to pretend he didn't interrupt anything as you pull away from the warmth and comfort that is Baekhyun.

"Sorry to interrupt, but... it's time to go."

A slight stab of fear pierces your heart because everything was happening so freaking fast. You felt like you had zero time to prepare yourself mentally or emotionally for whatever was about to happen, and it was all coming to a head quicker than you liked.

Baekhyun's hand stays on the small of your back as the two of you follow Jongin back down the hallway. The only people left in the compound were your brother, Minseok, Yixing, and the man you just remembered was named Junyoung. As you approach the group, who were clearly waiting for you, your brother gives you a small smile. Once you're in reach, his hand comes up to rest on the back of your head, lightly patting your hair.

"You ready?" You nod at his question, and your brother pulls you into a tight hug of his own. "After today, we won't have to worry about the Baem anymore. We're going to get the revenge we should've gotten years ago."

After he pulls away, time slips from you. You're ushered out into an SUV and driving towards the city before you even realize Yixing is the one driving you. You turn to the back seat and see Junyoung staring out the window behind you.

"Ah, she's back." Yixing tries to joke, but you're not in the mood.

"Yixing... what's going to happen tonight?"

You knew Jongin said they were blowing up half of the city, but that couldn't be true, right? There was no way for something like that to go unnoticed. How would you even begin to explain it?

"Jongin was exaggerating, right?"

A grimace passes on Yixing's face, and you know right away, Jongin had not been exaggerating.

"What the hell?! How are any of you going to get away with this?"

Yixing shrugs like what they were going to do wasn't even a big deal. "That's just how it works. The city officials will take care of the explanation. Gas leaks, terrorism, maybe even gang violence, but either way, they benefit from this."

"How do they benefit from their city being blown up?" You ask in disbelief.

"If everything goes right, an entire mafia family is going to be wiped away. That's less crime, fewer drugs, and less mafia leader's to deal with. Any debts or blackmail the Baem have on them will be gone, and that's all they care about."

"But you guys will still have that information... which is exactly why they'll cover for you."

He smirks as you piece together the inner workings of corruption. "You're just like your brother, mafia princess."

You make a face at the name and feel the slightest bit of your mood change. "Don't ever call me that again."

Sehun's POV

He anxiously taps his fingers against his leg as he sits in the passenger seat of Chanyeol's car. So many things were running through his mind that he almost couldn't even pick one to focus on.

As they followed one of the men's vehicles ahead, Jongdae he thinks, he finally focuses in on one thing. How weird it was to be with Chanyeol again. Well, EXO in general, but especially in the car with Chanyeol now. It had been months since he's seen his home or been within such close proximity to his cousin, and you'd think he'd be ecstatic, but he was more conflicted than he expected.

He couldn't be happier to be back with his family and to feel safe but the familiarity he once felt was further away than he expected. He knew he had changed. Anyone who went through what he had was bound to come back different. He just didn't expect to feel so removed from himself. Maybe it was because he had no chance to acclimate back into his old life. He was immediately thrown back into the chaos that was eerily similar to the last time he went out on an EXO mission.

That was another thing that bothered him. Once Chanyeol explained what they were doing, Sehun felt a tightening in his chest. A fear he didn't even realize he had was growing inside of him. He was terrified of history repeating itself, of one of them being lost to EXO or another being lost to himself. He wasn't mentally prepared for it.

The next thing that was bugging him was where Jaesuk was. Had he been able to get away? Did the leaders find him? Was he already gone from this world? Sehun had to find out what happened to him before this was all over.

Chanyeol turns off the headlights as they approach the corner of the street they needed, snapping Sehun from his thoughts. The sun was still setting, painting the sky with purples and golds, and providing enough light for them to see.

Sehun took note of the fact that they weren't in an extravagant area of town. In fact, the houses were majorly run down or already abandoned by whoever owned them previously. It would be easy to blow up this area without a thought or worry about people being around and catching them.

A black SUV was waiting up ahead, and Sehun knew it was men from his and Chanyeol's units. A spark of relief fills him at the thought of seeing his men. The ones who somehow managed to grow on him, even though Sehun often tried to keep his distance from them.

"The warehouse is about a quarter of a mile to the East, but this will be our rendezvous point," Chanyeol informs him, nodding his head to where the men are.

They pull to a stop behind the SUV, and Chanyeol turns off the ignition. Before he opens his door, he turns to Sehun. "I know you just came back, but there's no one else I'd rather have by my side right now."

Sehun nods, not knowing what to say to the soft words that flowed from Chanyeol's mouth, but he doesn't even get the chance to speak. His cousin throws open the door and climbs out of his car, leaving Sehun sitting there. He watches Chanyeol walk over to the men and decides it's now or never.

Pushing the car door open, he slowly climbs out of the vehicle and starts to head over to the men Chanyeol had greeted. Almost one-by-one, all eight of them turn to face him with equal amounts of shock and confusion. Their gazes switch back and forth between Sehun and Chanyeol, trying to figure out what's going on. Clearly, none of them had expected Sehun to show up today, especially on this mission.

Sehun feels a wave of awkwardness ripple through the men as he comes to a stop in between two of them. A moment later, he's being grabbed by multiple arms and being pulled into a hug with his men. Sehun tries to hide the small smile creeping on his face at their low greetings. He doesn't want them to think he has gone soft, but the smile is there anyway.

"Alright, we'll celebrate later," Chanyeol says, breaking up the moment. "You guys know what to do. Set up devices every 10 yards around the warehouse's perimeter, and if you get caught by anyone, shoot them. Make sure your silencers are on to minimize the sound, and whatever you do, do not let them capture you. There will not be a rescue mission here. If you're not at the rally point in 15 minutes, that's it. This building is going to be blown sky-high. Don't be in it."

Sehun notices the four men from Chanyeol's unit slowly nod, but the four from Sehun's unit look hesitant. Actually, they all looked hesitant to follow Chanyeol's orders but, in the end, his men were going to no matter what. Sehun's men, however, look to Sehun for leadership, and Sehun looks back and forth between them and Chanyeol.

"Do exactly as he said. He knows more about this than I do." Sehun finally tells them once he realizes they're waiting for his orders.

Whatever awkwardness was happening here would have to wait until later. Hopefully, he'd have a chance to talk with them and figure out what the heck was going on and why they weren't immediately listening to Chanyeol.

10 minutes later, all of Sehun's and his unit's bombs were in place and ready to be detonated. There was one close call where he thought they were going to get caught, but they were able to hide quick enough and finish the task. Sehun was surprised to see the warehouse so empty and seemingly unguarded. It was enough to put him on edge, considering he knew from his time with the Baem that this was usually a well-secured building.

The little alarm bells in his head started ringing once they got to the rally point, and he noticed Chanyeol and his men weren't anywhere in sight. Sehun tried to calm himself because he knew they had another five minutes to get here but, with each minute that passed, Sehun grew increasingly worried.

Once the 15 minutes were up, and Chanyeol was still a no-show, Sehun immediately started making his way back toward the building. He makes it a few feet before one of his men grips his arm tightly.

"He said this wasn't a rescue mission."

"If you think I'm not going in there after my cousin, you're very much mistaken."

The man moves in front of him in an attempt to physically stop him, and Sehun has to stop himself from laughing. "It's been 15 minutes. We have to be in sync with the other groups, or backup will show up here to protect the warehouse."

"First of all," Sehun says, while removing the man's grip from his arm, "don't grab me like that again. Secondly, I don't give a fuck what Chanyeol said. I'm not leaving anyone behind, and I'm certainly not leaving five of them. I wouldn't leave any of you behind, so I'm not leaving my own family behind either. Give me five minutes, and if I'm not back, blow it up."

"We're not blowing up the building with you in it." Another one of his men says while stepping closer to them.

"But you'll do it with five other men in there?" Sehun asks with disappointment.

"I don't know what the hell happened while I was gone, but this is not how we do things, and we're not going to start now."

The man next to him bites his lip while looking over at the one who had the guts to stop Sehun before deciding for himself. "You're right. We don't leave anyone behind. We'll give you five minutes, but then we're coming in after you."

Sehun gives a curt nod, already planning the discussion he was going to have with his unit for the little stunt that was just pulled before running for the warehouse. He couldn't believe they were willing to leave the other men behind, and he didn't care if that's what Chanyeol told them to do. That wasn't how Sehun led them, and he was damn sure going to remind them of that.

Another small thought niggled at the back of his mind. Had they done that to him? Did they even bother to search for Sehun when we went missing, or did they just write him off like they were willing to do to Chanyeol?

Sehun pushes the thought aside as he enters the giant warehouse. He wildly looks around for a sign of anyone, but there's nothing. The building is almost eerily quiet, and Sehun knew this would end badly. He knew the warehouse, which held all different types of guns, usually had a minimum of 20 people loitering around. The fact that there was no one... it wasn't right.

Movement toward the back of the building caught his attention, and he took off toward it at full speed. He made it to the back of the building in less than 30 seconds, but when he rounded the same corner he saw the man go around, there was nothing, literally nothing, not even a door.

Sehun turns around, thinking there was a small chance he missed something and meets the end of a Glock. He looks past the barrel of the gun pointed directly in his face to meet the eyes of a Baem member he didn't recognize. Mentally, he let out a multitude of curse words, but physically, he kept his face completely blank.

"I don't know if I should say 'welcome home' or if I should shoot you for trespassing." The man smugly says.

Much to his disappointment, Sehun gives him nothing. No words or facial movements, just a blank stare while he waits to see what the man's next move will be. Once the man realizes this, he roughly grabs Sehun by his jacket and pushes him in front of him, down toward a short hallway. Sehun only makes it to the second door on the left before he's shoved into the room by the man behind him.

This was it. They were finally going to kill him. He couldn't decide if it was almost more cruel that he was given the chance to see the people he loved one last time or not. Would it be easier for them to let him go now that they got to see him and reunite, or would it hurt more?

However, Sehun was in for the shock of his life when he scans the room and sees his two closest allies kneeling on the ground while being tied up with guns pointed toward their heads.

His head shoots up, and he counts six other Baem members in the room, including the one who brought him here at gunpoint before his eyes fall back down to Chanyeol and Jaesuk.

If the other two men were free, there was a chance that the three of them could easily take on the other six men, but just Sehun himself? No way. There was also no way he'd get the chance to free his two friends from the chains that were attached to their hands and feet.

There was only one thing Sehun could do, and that was stall the Baem long enough for his unit to get to them.

He looks between Chanyeol and Jaesuk. One knowing exactly who the other was, while the other didn't have a clue. Chanyeol didn't know who Jaesuk was. He didn't know he was the one who protected him and guided him while his memory was gone, or that Jae was part of the reason this entire operation was possible. All he knew was there was some man tied up next to him, but Jae knew exactly who Chanyeol was. He knew how important his cousin was to him.

Jaesuk had clearly been beaten during or after his capture and Sehun was surprised and suspicious, yet very happy the man was still alive. Although... Sehun had to wonder why the Baem kept him alive or what their plan was.

The two men, though tied up, looked very pissed off that Sehun was in front of them, and not far away like he should've been. Sehun ignores them and looks around the room for whoever was in charge. That's when his eyes land on Minho. The man who had lied to him from the first moment he met him.

"Oh Sehun... I'm sad to see us in this situation."

"I'm sure you are," Sehun replies drily, causing a smirk to grow on Minho's face.

Sehun cautiously watches while Minho walks behind Chanyeol and Jaesuk's tied up bodies and spews more bullshit. "So, when did you get your memories back?"

"Does it really matter? It turns out I was able to help EXO even when I didn't have my memory."

Sehun really would give almost anything to wipe that smirk off of Minho's face, but his words just cause Minho to step towards Jaesuk and kick him swiftly in the ribs. Jae grunts in pain but remains in his kneeling position.

"Right. I'm sure this one provided enough of that information to you also."

"Jaesuk had nothing to do with it." Sehun defensively says, knowing it was futile but still trying to cover for him.

Chanyeol looks between Sehun and the man next to him in realization. It was clear once Sehun said his name, Chanyeol figured out that this was the Baem member Sehun had been working with.

When Minho didn't bother to respond to Sehun, he got a little worried. He knew he had to keep the Baem members talking if he wanted to give his unit enough time to get in here and offer some help.

"What do you even want, Minho?"

Minho glances over at Sehun in surprise. "What do I want? Well, I want your cousin here to die because he's my enemy, I want to torture Jaesuk for his betrayal, and I want to make you sit there and watch it all. However, I don't have the time for that, considering EXO is making a move on us as we speak, so I'm going to force you to choose instead."

An uneasy feeling creeps up Sehun's spine as he considers Minho's words. "Choose what?"

A cruel smirk grows on Minho's face as he walks back and forth behind Chanyeol and Jaesuk. "Which one of these two walks out of here alive. Your cousin or your ally?"

"And why would I do that?" Sehun tries to ask in a calm voice.

There was no fucking way he was going to choose who was going to live or die between Chanyeol and Jaesuk. He would never be able to go on with his life, supposing he was able to make it out of this room alive, knowing he saved one and not the other.

Minho shrugs like the answer was obvious. "Because if you don't, I'll kill them both."

"Why do you think I'm stupid enough to not know you're just going to kill them both anyway before coming after me?"

"See... if you choose, I'll let the other one go. Now, if he gets away fast enough will be up to him," he says with a smile. "I really only want you and Jaesuk, and I'm guessing you'll choose to free your cousin. This way, it's much more fun for me to watch Jaesuk realize you don't give a shit about him, and he betrayed us for nothing. On the other hand, the small chance you choose Jaesuk over Chanyeol is too delicious to pass up."

"I'm not choosing." Sehun refuses, avoiding the eyes of the two men kneeling on the floor. A minimum of three minutes had to have passed by now. He only had to stall for a tiny bit longer.

Minho lazily points a finger toward him. "See, if you don't choose, I'm killing all three of you right here, right now. Come on, Sehun! At least give one of them hope that they'll survive!"

To make his point clear, two Baem members step up on each side of Chanyeol and Jaesuk and point the barrels of their guns at their heads. Sehun heard movement from behind him and knew another member was pointing one at his as well.

He finally makes eye contact with his two allies again and finds rage simmering in their eyes, but... there's also a deadly calmness in them, like both men were prepared for whatever Sehun decided to do. It was almost unnerving.

"Come on, Sehun... Don't make me actually start to countdown." Minho taunts.

Sehun looks at him with an expression of pure hatred. If he makes it out of this alive, he's going to redefine what the word "torture" means, and he's going to enjoy every second of it.

Minho lets out a sigh. "Fine. We can do it this way too."

"3..."

"2..."

"1..."

Tagging: @knjkitten @kpopserene @multifandombxxch @tashaxvamp @kpop---scenarios @bhyunni @chanyeolismybaby @flaming-laboob @taetaeeyong @lilbitoflyssa @misstressporkchoppp @hoseok-wang @spiltkpop @isha454 @depuis2mille @marovekian1 @ladylynae @abby8451 @lynniev @insta1010 @sawadabegum @avxngxrrogxrs @equesasprokishi @imstuckinafictionaluniverse @layisanangel @mongryong-the-corgi @overthelamebowz @lizbether01 @thatanonymousgirl-as14 @nothingbutadeadesceane @kim-ji-hyeons-world @suhappysuho @futuremrspcy @lovebuginlove @skylions-den @precious-seungwooya @softysuho @kuppyjiminie @blushinyouth @bat-shark-repellant @vickylamore @heartshapedenchiladas @cardtak @tanithrea @wooya1224 @multifanstuff @hyuniebaby @sehunnies-hunnie96 @endzii23 @kkpoptrashhh @mayzerofour @ries-universe

147 notes · View notes

marshmallow-phd · 4 years ago

Text

Nine Little Letters

Genre: College AU, Fake Dating AU, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before AU

Inspired By: This graphic made by @rcse-tvler

Pairing: EXO x Reader

Summary: Just when you thought life was done shoving you down, it got much, much worse. After finding out that your latest crush was already in a relationship, you did what you always did when emotions ran high: you wrote a letter. Signed and sealed, you put it away with the eight other letters you’d written to past one-sided loves, never to be seen again. That is, until a mix up accidentally sends those letters out to their respective recipients and you find yourself in the middle of one confusing web of love. With fake relationships, insecurities, and revelations swirling around, things are bound to get a little messy.

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11

The second letter you ever wrote was perhaps the most embarrassing of them all.

During the summer of your thirteenth year, Baekhyun had gone away to a summer camp that had lasted for over a month. Bored to tears due to the missing antics, you spent more time with your other friend, Yeonhee, though - as much as you loved her - her presence didn’t have the same level of comfort as Baekhyun’s did. You weren’t sure what the reason was, but there always seemed to be this invisible barrier between you and Yeonhee. You couldn’t get quite as close to her. There was so much relief the day that Baekhyun came back. But something else was there, too. Something that had been growing throughout the absence.

At first, you thought your heart was beating fast because you ran to the park where Baekhyun told you to meet him. You were excited - elated - to have your best friend back. When you saw him lying on the teeter-totter, you stopped. His skin was sun-kissed, hair a bit longer and tousled. You’d never realized how… handsome he was before. Your face was smiling before you knew it.

You liked him. That had to explain why you missed him so much, right? As soon as Baekhyun saw that you’d arrived, he lit up, jumping off the playground equipment and running towards you. He pulled you into a quick hug then stepped back, ruffling your hair.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

“Come on.” He grabbed your hand and started pulling you away from the teeter-tatter. “Let’s go down to the creek!”

You followed him without hesitation, loving the feeling of his hand in yours. Later that night, you tossed and turned, unable to sleep because of this new information. At thirteen, you were a bit smarter than you were at ten, so you decided to put some feelers out. You would see if there was any chance that he felt the same way. The two of you were close, after all. The chance had to be there, didn’t it?

The answer was no. And you received that answer almost immediately. The next day Baekhyun went on and on about this girl he had met at camp. He talked about how funny she was and cute and playful. And beautiful. He wouldn’t stop talking about how pretty he found her. She was at a summer camp, for Pete’s sake, but somehow still managed to be soft and delicate and everything Baekhyun liked in girls. It felt like an uppercut punch to the jaw. You could be soft and delicate. You wore skirts and boots and cardigans. Your room was pastel colors! What was the difference between you and this girl he rambled on about?

Flashing back to Jongin and how much better you felt after writing him the letter, you sat down at the table while your parents were away at work and tried to see if it had the same effect.

Dear Baekhyun,

How are you? I guess that’s an awkward thing to ask given how I always know how you are. You always tell me, whether you’re happy or sad or simply indifferent. You tell me everything. And I’ve always loved that, the fact that we could tell each other whatever we’re thinking. But lately, you’ve been telling me too much and I’ve been keeping quiet. You tell me so much about this girl you met at camp and how much you like her and what the two of you talked about on the phone last night and how you’ve made plans to meet up next week. You go on and on about her without seeing the hurt in my eyes. I stay silent because of that hurt. Because while you were away, I realized something. I realized that I like you. As more than just my best friend. I find myself wishing that you were talking about me that way. What does this girl have that I don’t, anyway? She sounds a lot like me. I even wondered at one point if you were secretly talking about me until you mentioned meeting up with her. You seem so happy, though. So, I wonder, should I say anything or should I just go on being just your friend? I guess I'll make the decision at the end of this letter. If I send it out or if I keep it hidden in my drawer. Do I come out and say it or do I risk forever thinking “What if?” Only time will really tell. Either way, I hope you’re happy. That’s most important.

Love,

(y/n)

In the end, you decided not to mail it. Though you never met the girl from summer camp, Baekhyun ended up “dating” her for the fall semester of school - if it could be counted since they lived in different cities. He always went to see her, but she never made the same effort. That was why they broke up, according to Baekhyun. Though he never came to see you in the same light as far as you were aware, you found that you were able to move on, to see him once again simply as your friend. Perhaps the two of you were soulmates in the platonic way. You were thankful to your past self for not mailing out that letter. Where would your friendship be if you had sent it? Would there even still be a friendship?

“Okay, I know you’re not a professional or anything, but you’re even worse today. What’s going on?”

You blinked, coming out of your head just in time to watch your character crumple to the ground, dead. Great.

You weren’t the best at video games, but you found them fun and Sehun didn’t mind if you weren’t as good as him. He definitely carried the two of you in the team rounds.

“Nothing, I just have a lot on my mind.” Both the truth and a lie. You were mildly distracted at the moment. It was a small amount of connected things. Seeing Junmyeon with a girlfriend had conjured up some old insecurities. While you were fairly sure that you were over him, you were circling around your lack of love life - and lack of dating history. As in zero. Zip. A big old goose egg. Of course, when that happened, you tended to retreat into your books and movies. Which rom-coms you were going to binge tonight was currently at the forefront of your mind, held up by everything else.

“So, obviously, it’s not nothing,” Sehun pointed out over the headset. Touché.

“Okay, it’s not nothing, but it's not something you’d be interested in anyway.”

“Try me.”

You paused. “I was thinking about how I’ve never had a boyfriend, so I was going to watch romantic comedies tonight.”

Silence.

Well, not total silence since the video game was still on in the background, but there was no response from your partner. “Sehun?”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m not that interested. But I also don’t see how watching movies about romance is a direct response to not having a boyfriend.”

You sighed as your character re-spawned and you continued with the game, covering Sehun from any surprise attacks as you inched closer to enemy territory. “They make me feel better.”

He took a pause to kill an enemy soldier before replying, “I still don’t get it. How can watching fake couples get together make you feel better? If you want a boyfriend, why don’t you go out and get one? It’s not like there isn’t a whole campus full of single guys.”

You scoffed. Yeah, right. Like it was that simple. There wasn’t a store or a catalogue that you could flip through and go “Oh, I’d like that one!” and have a boyfriend ready and raring to go. Although… someone should get on that revolutionary idea. It could be worth millions.

Part of you wanted to respond with “Fine, do you want to date me?” but you bit your tongue, knowing that you didn’t mean it. There had once been a time that you had thought about Sehun in that way. The two of you rarely saw each other in person. For a good year and a half, the two of you had been simple online buddies until you realized you lived in the same city. You’d invited Sehun along to outings with Baekhyun and Yeonhee, but they didn’t click very well, so it didn’t happen too often. After the first time you met Sehun, you thought he was cute. Que the letter.

Dear Sehun.

I know you try to hide it, but you’re actually very sweet. And I know that you let me win sometimes. And you help me every chance you get. I like you because of that. Also, I never thought you would be cute. Is that bad? Do you think you could like me back? We could be that gamer couple. Those who play together, stay together, right?

Love,

(y/n).

It was the cringiest of all your letters. Short, uninteresting, bland. After you wrote it, you realized quickly that those were the only reasons you liked him: his face and he was nice to you. Were your standards really that low? His letter always stayed at the bottom of the pile, hardly ever revisited. That was when you realized it was hard to truly like someone you didn’t know all that well. You still considered him a friend and could confide in him, but he didn’t make your comfortable triangle a square.

“Hey, (y/n)!” Baekhyun burst into your room with no warning. You jumped, letting out a rare curse into the headset.

“Baekhyun, what are you doing here?” On Saturdays he was usually busy giving piano lessons.

“And on that note, I’m out.” Sehun clicked off without a real goodbye. You shook your head. Boys.

You turned off your console and swiveled around in your chair. Baekhyun was seated at your vanity which made you nervous. He knew better than to go peeking into your things, but that hardly stopped him. And while he was aware of the letters’ existence, he was neither aware of his own nor where they were located.

“My pupil for the day canceled on me. They’re sick. I was bored so I came over. As per usual.” Looking over his shoulder at your mirror, he plucked off one of the pictures you had wedged into the frame. “Heard from your long-distance boyfriend lately?”

“Hardy, har-har.” You snatched the picture from him and replaced it. “He’s not my boyfriend and you know it.”

Zhang Yixing was your pen pal from high school. After seeing a flyer on one of the bulletin boards in the hallway, you jumped at the chance to communicate with someone from another country without really thinking about it. The partners were all chosen at random and you considered yourself quite lucky. The person you exchanged letters with was sweet and funny and really read what you wrote to him, always replying to your words before going into his own story. While life got in the way and the two of you weren’t able to exchange letters at the frequency you once had, you still received a surprise every so often.

And yes, before anyone asks, he was one of the nine. One look at his dimpled smile and charming eyes and anyone would be hooked. You’d giggled like crazy when you opened the letter junior year and his photo fell out. He’d wanted to show you the countryside school he’d volunteered at and the kids he’d helped. As cute as those children were, he was all you could look at. So, naturally, there was one letter you never sent. It didn’t make sense to send it. He was in an entirely different country. So, you used his letter as camouflage, keeping it on top at all times to hide the others underneath.

“And no, by the way. I haven’t gotten a letter for a little bit.”

“Too busy volunteering?” Baekhyun quipped.

“You could take a page out of his book, you know.”

“I do give back! I give free lessons all the time!”

Okay… that was true. Baekhyun did have a soft heart for kids that wanted to learn to play the piano but whose parents couldn't afford to pay for lessons. About twice a month on Sundays, he went to a local church and taught a class for anyone who wanted to join. It was actually kind of sweet. You’d gone a few times and he could be pretty adorable with the kids.

“Alright,” you said. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know.” Baekhyun pursed his lips and tapped a finger against his chin. His eyes slowly made their way around your room. He would smile when his eyes landed on pictures of the two of you or little souvenirs from your various adventures. Your room was like a scrapbook for the world to view. You enjoyed being surrounded by memories, like reading a book based on your life. “I’m kind of hungry.”

“Okay,” you laughed. “For what?”

He turned away from you, mostly still listening, but obviously distracted by something. “Let’s go to a grill.”

That suggestion sent sparks off in your brain. Your stomach, which had been neutral up until now, was roaring for the sizzling meat and spicy side dishes. In fact, you’d been distracted at the thought of a Korean grill that you didn’t notice Baekhyun’s hand twitching on the forbidden drawer. Before your brain could process what he was doing, the drawer was open. Baekhyun pulled the entire stack of letters out.

“Wow, you actually do keep all of these!”

“What the hell are you doing!” You bounced on him, tackling him down to the floor as you wrestled the envelopes from him. Once you finally pulled them free, you smacked his arm with the stack. “You jerk! You know those are private!”

He actually had the audacity to pout. “I just wanted to see!”

“They’re not for you to see!”

“Come on, (y/n),” Baekhyun sat up when you moved off him. You kept the envelopes close to your chest in case he tried for them again. “I thought I was your best friend.”

“Don’t you dare try to guilt trip me,” you snapped. “I have a right to my privacy. These aren’t meant for anyone else but me.”

“Fine.” He threw his hands up in defeat. “But you might want to find a better hiding spot. Let’s go eat.” He left your room, smiling to himself.

Grumbling to yourself, you placed the envelopes on your vanity. Later, you would find a better place to put them. For now, though, you draped a shirt over the stack so they were mostly covered.

You forgot about the letters for the most part by the time the two of you made it to the restaurant. Baekhyun had his moments where he didn’t think things through or he acted purely on impulse, but you could forgive those happenings. At least, when he was paying for dinner. On the way to the grill, you called Yeonhee to join.

“So, there’s this girl in my World Music three-oh-four class,” Baekhyun said right after shoving a stuffed sesame leaf into his mouth. “She’s really cute. And plays the cello. Her fingers are so nimble and small.”

“So, you going to ask her out?” you teased.

Baekhyun took some time to chew his food before answering. “Yeah. Actually, I think I might.”

“Does she seem interested in you?” Yeonhee asked. She was always the more practical one out of the three of you. She saw things in black and white. She either chose door number one or door number two. It was a philosophy she used in every aspect of her life. That realism rounded your little triangle out. Baekhyun was the carefree, never-knew-what-he-was-going-to-do-next type, you were the slightly anxiety-ridden, romantic daydreamer, and Yeonhee was the down-to-earth, rational one.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Okay. Then do it.” Yeonhee pulled her long, dark brown hair back into a scrunchy to keep it out of her face. To her, that was the end of it.

Baekhyun sent you a look, but he shrugged. “Alright. I’ll see her on Monday, so I’ll ask her to coffee then.”

Your phone vibrated against the table. Normally you would have ignored it, but given the lull in conversation, you checked to see the notification. It was a text from your mom.

I’m doing laundry. It looks like you have a full hamper. Do you want me to take some?

You smiled. You loved getting out of laundry. Yeah! Thank you!

Okay! A second text came through. Do you want me to take this shirt on the vanity, too?

Shirt? What- Panic swept through you. No! That’s okay! It’s clean.

Okay! Love you!

Love you, too!

Phew. That was close.

The rest of dinner was spent talking about classes and professors and new movies coming out. The three of you bounced from subject to subject, spending a good hour and half at the table slowly devouring the different meat courses. Multiple groups came and went while you sat there and enjoyed this time with your two best friends. When it was time to go home, Yeonhee volunteered to take you home since it was more on her way than Baekhyun’s. Once there, she parked in your driveway. Rounding the car, you bent down to tell her goodnight. A second or two later, Kyungsoo pulled into his parents’ driveway. He got out of his own car, eyes down on his phone. Noticing the two of you next door, he froze. There was an awkward tension as the exes made eye contact while you stood there like an unneeded third wheel on a bike. Finally, Kyungsoo broke the contact and went inside.

“Have you talked to him lately?” you asked.

Yeonhee shook her head. “Not at all. What’s the point? I ended it. Going back and opening the wound makes no sense.”

“Yeah, that’s understandable. I’ll, um, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Yeah, see ya.”

You straightened up and headed inside.

Yeonhee and Kyungsoo were a tragic story, at least in your eyes.

Kyungsoo was your next-door neighbor for your entire life though the two of you didn’t interact very often. He ran in different circles and seemed annoyed by Baekhyun most of the time - a pattern you were not blind to. But Yeonhee always took the time to talk to him if you happened to be in the front yard and crossed paths. Oblivious to what was going on while they conversed, you stood by, studying your neighbor.

He was handsome and sweet when he wasn’t frowning. In fact, his smile was quite stunning. And he was smart and, though rare, cracked jokes that had you in stitches. You found yourself admiring him. Imagine your shock when you discovered that he was dating one of your best friends. You were devastated. The strength of the feeling took you by surprise. But you’d managed to keep it together in front of both of them. Only when you were alone were you finally able to let it out. That night you’d locked yourself in your room, tears flowing in an unending stream. At some point, you were sitting down at your vanity, pencil flying across the page without you having to think it through.

Dear Kyungsoo,

What am I even feeling right now? How am I feeling like this? You were always just my neighbor, the boy next door. Occasionally kind, helpful. I never even suspected that you liked Yeonhee or that she liked you back. I was completely left out, blind to what was happening in front of me. Mostly because I couldn’t see past myself. You were nothing like how I’d thought in our younger years. You are so much more. Amazing feels like too simple a word but that’s all I can conjure up. I’ve been so in awe that I couldn't completely understand what it was that I was feeling inside. But now… I feel like my heart has shattered. I had come to look forward to talking to you in between our yards. I never suspected you were coming out for Yeonhee. You chose her over me. I’m sure in your eyes, I was never even one of the selections. But why? Am I really that invisible?

You are a wonderful person. I’m not sure if there are enough adjectives in the world to describe how I see you. You’re like a portrait in the Louvre, unable for me to touch. You’re out of reach. And now that you’re with Yeonhee, you always will be. I know that you’ll treat her well. You’ll keep her hand warm with your own like I wish you could with mine. When she’s tired, she’ll rest her head on your shoulder. I hope you’re a comforting pillow. You seem like that kind of person. A comfort, a stronghold. I wish you could have been mine.

Love,

(y/n).

They dated for two years before Yeonhee inexplicably ended the relationship. You knew she would have a very logical, analyzed reasoning for why she abruptly broke it off, though she never told you or anyone. However, you were surprised with how angry you were at her. How could she do that to someone like Kyungsoo, who had never treated her badly even for a moment? Your sympathy lied with him, but you had to show support for your friend. She wanted to move on, so you pretended to understand. She didn’t come around very often anymore in case of situations like tonight where she might accidentally run into or see him.

Up in your bedroom, you took a deep breath. Because it still hurt after all this time. You still longed to be the one he looked at, the one he wanted to see. Out of all your letters, his was the one that never worked. His was sealed up tight, but the feelings didn’t go away. They held on tight like a rock climber without a rope. You could distract yourself with other crushes, give in to fleeting feelings for others. And it would work for a little while. But in your weak moments, those feelings never failed to come back. Tonight was a reminder of that.

215 notes · View notes

niawritess · 4 years ago

Text

The Lovestruck~Chapter 15

( 16 December)

9:33 am

Arriving at your college, you found students making the whole campus chaotic, which was understandable since the announcement happened yesterday.

It's been few days since the bowling day and the play took over yesterday with principal announcing an event happening in the coming week which left students excited.

"I'm so excited!" Ria exclaimed clapping her hands and you shook your head at her chuckling as you two were walking out of the class. "You're always excited for parties, no?"

"And you are not, how boring." She rolled her eyes and earned a smack from you before you two heard your names being called out.

Looking at the direction, you spotted Mark running towards you with a smile on his face before he stopped infront of you.

"Are you also excited for the party?" Ria questioned him smiling brightly and he frowned shaking his head causing you chuckle at your bestfriend as she pouted.

"You look happy, did something good happened?" You asked him and he smiled again before instantly pulling you in a hug leaving you shook.

He pulled away sensing you standing still and chuckled awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry, I just got excited."

You coughed out looking away embarrassed to lock eyes with your bestfriend who was staring at you with surprised expression and you gave her a what look where she snapped out.

"Ahem, why are you so excited that you even hugged y/n." She crossed her arms staring at Mark teasingly and you frowned slapping her arm lightly.

"Oh, that, I made a painting and it was uploaded on our college blog and I just just heard from professor that they got called by a famous Art Gallery and they want to present my painting on their exhibition." He told with a shy smile.

You and Ria looked at eachother amazed before smiling widely at him and praised him. You three started walking to the garden area with him telling you that he won't be able to attend the party since he has to go there.

Imersed in talking and unaware of the fact that Baekhyun was watching the scene from the window of the music room with clenched jaw. He didn't know why but he didn't liked how Mark hugged you and seeing it, he had the urge to pull him away from you.

"Baekhyun-ah!"

He followed the voice which called out him to see Yixing staring at him with worried look at which Baekhyun raised his brows questionly.

He followed Yixing's gaze to his hand and got shocked to see a plastic water bottle crushed in his hand. Not able to look at him, he excused himself outside to throw this with an excuse to be alone.

Why was he feeling this way? Seeing you with smiling at other guy made him feel weird inside and really bothered him enough to feel angry. He looked at the crushed bottle and gulped hardly before throwing it in the ban.

He needed to sort this out quickly before he gets crazy with the thoughts.

***

12:34 pm

You were in the cafeteria with your bestfriend and Baekhyun with his friends at the same table with you. At first it was a little awkward since you were getting stared at but not now and you're used to it.

Chanyeol, Sehun and Jongin were discussing about the party and Ria being the biggest enthusiastic joined them. They kept sharing their latest experiences from their previous parties at how Jongin got drunk and spilled his drink on one of the professors then next day the professor kept sending death glares to him.

Jongin did a fake shudder as he remembered about that night and all of you laughed at him before you looked to your side to see Baekhyun looking lost while playing with his food.

You frowned and tapped his shoulder to get his attention where he instantly looked at you surprised.

"Are you okay?"

"Huh?" He looked confused then following your gaze to his plate then back to you and gave a little smile before nodding. Though you weren't convinced but you also didn't wanted to force him so you just went back to your business.

Meanwhile, Baekhyun, he was still bothered by the scene he witnessed earlier and being the straightforward person he is, he couldn't help but ask about this.

"Can I ask you something?"

You looked at him confusingly before nodding then Baekhyun saw everyone imersed in talking and he leaned a bit to your side.

"Are you dating Mark?"

You looked at him surprised taken aback by his sudden question out of your imagination. Seeing your shook face Baekhyun wanted to punch himself for being too straightforward.

You don't know why but you didn't wanted any misunderstanding between you two and instantly shook your head. "No! Why would you think that?"

His face lit up upon hearing your answer and hid his grin. "Uh, I happened to see you two hugging so, yeah."

"Ah! That he was excited so unknowingly he did that." You casually said even though you were also shook by his gesture.

Baekhyun's head snapped with a serious expression. "Just because he was excited, he hugged you?"

You stared at him confused and he cleared his throat feeling himself overreacting but he couldn't help himself, boy was jealous as hell.

"Nevermind, Are you coming to the party?"

He smiled genuinely and you stared at him as how he was acting weird right now and instantly changed.

"Oh, right! Are you two coming?" Sehun asked and Ria immediately nodded. Well, nothing new.

"I'll have to stay away from professors, I don't wanna repeat the scene." Jongin whined.

"Too bad. You would be dancing in the bathroom and you wouldn't even know." Chanyeol commented earning a glare from the latter while you all laughed.

"So, Are you coming?" Chanyeol questioned and you shrugged. "I'm not sure. I mean, I'm not a party person so..."

"Yeah! Come to think of it, I have never seen you any college events too." Sehun tapped his index finger on his chin and Jongin nodded.

"You should come," You looked at Baekhyun. "I mean, this time won't come back and when you look back, you would have some memories to remember."

You stared at him pondering his words before a smile crept on your face and you nodded. "I'll think about it."

"Baekhyun Hyung, you should become a philosopher." Sehun commented and the latter rolled his eyes.

"She will come." Ria spoke with a confident tone making you confuse before a smug smile appeared on her lips as she had a plan.

Still smiling, she looked ahead and made an eye contact with Chanyeol who was already staring at her but instantly looked away. Ria also looked down at her food with her blushing face and you watched the scene like an investigator.

Later, you went to the library to return some books and met Rowoon outside by chance then decided to walk with with him but while passing by the garden area you witnessed a scene you wished you shouldn't have.

"What the hell are you trying to do?!"

You and Rowoon halted when you heard a familiar voice which belonged to Baekhyun. You really didn't wanted to pry or see anything but that's when you heard another familiar voice.

"At least tell me the reason!"

"This..."

And before you knew it, Rowoon was already going towards them with you trying to stop him.

"Don't you feel ashamed asking me this, when you have a freaking boyfriend?"

"I got close to him so I can get close to you!"

Your jaw slightly dropped upon hearing Lauren's words and so was Baekhyun as looked at her with disgusting eyes.

"I can't believe this! You would stoop this low! And I already told you that I don't like you!"

You flinched by his sudden outburst before looking at Rowoon who had his jaw clenched with his eyes showing hurt.

You felt so bad and that's when you locked eyes with Baekhyun who seemed shocked and Lauren followed his gaze and her face turned pale.

Before she could say anything, Rowoon walked away from there with Lauren following him, not before glaring at you thinking you led him here.

You and Baekhyun stared at eachother, not saying anything until he began to explain but you stopped him saying he doesn't have to since you already saw everything and it wasn't his fault.

As for him, he felt relieved that you didn't misunderstood and trusted him.

***

Days passed and you noticed the tension between Baekhyun and Rowoon as both of them seemed too awkward to talk which was weird for his friends too, since they always get along well.

Coming back to Lauren, she seemed guilty as Rowoon wasn't giving her any attention and stayed away from her which seemed to anger her and whenever you made an eye contact with her, she always glared at you.

Not to mention, she kept bumping into on purpose and did things where your patience was getting out of hands but you stayed still knowing how bad things would turn out, until one day.

Ria and you were seated in the cafeteria since everyone was too busy to be here so this time you both were alone, eating your food and laughing at eachother's jokes. You were about to grab a bite but a gasp escape from mouth as you felt something cold touched your head.

Then you realised, it was juice as you could smell it from your hair, keeping your eyes shut, you tried to calm down by taking a deep breath.

"Lauren! What the hell is wrong with you!?" Ria shouted, standing up from her chair and then looked at you, her eyes soften. "Y/n, are you okay?"

"Awe, is y/n gonna cry?" She laughed mockingly. "You deserve this for snatching my boyfriend from me!"

You took a deep breath before opening your eyes shot at her. "You should've poured water instead of juice, stupid."

She looked at you in disbelief. "W-what?"

You stood up and she took a step back while Ria smirked as she saw what was coming now.

"And what? Snatched your boyfriend? Who are you trying to fool? We both know who's fault it is." You snapped and she looked at you with wide eyes before looking around to see everyone was giving her weird looks.

"And If you think by doing this will make you some high and mighty," You folded your arms to your chest before stepping closer to her. "Then let me tell you it's not, you look like an attention seeker."

She huffed. "How dare-".

"Cockroach!" You shouted and she stepped back screaming and started dusting off her dress and her hair and then looked at you confusingly. "There's nothing!"

"Did I said there was?" You said with a pocker face and everyone started laughing at her, you just shook your head. "Stupid."

You took your food plate and was about to leave but turned back to her who was standing still and went closer to her.

"Don't mess with me again." You warned her firmly and turning around you left the cafeteria with Ria behind you before she threw a smug smile at Lauren.

***

"Gosh, I don't even have a shampoo with me!" You whined while washing your hair in the washroom.

"Here." Ria held out a towel and you took it before rubbing your hair and dried them in the hand dryer.

"But that was insane like y/n! You rocked it!" Ria exclaimed while your were combing your hair.

You sighed. "I had to, I saw this coming like how she was behaving with me since last few days, I didn't want to do that but she was testing my patience."

Ria patted your back. "You did the right thing Y/n but why did she do that?"

"Rowoon broke up with her." You looked at her reflection from the mirror and she gasped. "What? How?"

You looked around the washroom if someone was there but not finding anyone, you spun around and faced her. You narrated everything about that day but you kept it in since this was a personal matter of them and you just happened to witness it.

She scoffed. "Wow! I knew it! She was always looking at Baekhyun Sunbae with those flirty eyes and I heard that she got rejected by him before."

"You knew? Your eyes enlarged. "I didn't know that but whatever it is, Rowoon broke up with her and she's blaming me since he is ignoring her and still hanging out with us."

"Not just Rowoon but Baekhyun Sunbae and his friends too that's why she's jealous of you." She stated and you closed your eyes and sighed. "Let's just drop this topic."

"Y/n, you okay?" Ria asked in a worried tone and you opened before giving her a assuring smile. "Yeah."

She suddenly started laughing and you looked at her quizzically. "Why are you laughing?"

"It's just that you brought cockroach in the middle of serious atmosphere." She said in the midst of laughter and you joined her before you both got out of the washroom.

While walkng down the hallway, you both spotted Rowoon standing against your locker, he looked around and met your gaze before standing straight as you aproached.

"Rowoon what are you doing here?" Ria asked him and he shifted his eyes to you from her.

"I heard what happened." He spoke and you both looked at eachother before him.

"I'm really sorry y/n, this is all because of me." He gave you a guilty look and you shook your head. "No, it's not your fault, it's not like you did it, so don't blame yourself."

"But still-"

"No buts, just let it go hm?" You smiled and he nodded still feeling guilty and you noticed it.

"If you're still feeling sorry, then you can do something that'll make us happy." You tilted your head and they both gave you a confused look.

"What?" Rowoon asked, looking at you like you're gonna ask him to jump in a fire.

You chuckled. "Pizza treat, deal?"

His confused face changed into a grin and he nodded immediately. "Deal but when?"

"Right now! Because we didn't get to eat lunch." You patted your stomach and he chuckled.

"Yes! And y/n, you're not gonna eat mine." Ria nudged you and you just made a face before you three went out to a close restaurant.

***

Baekhyun who was in his class and his phone buzzed and it kept buzzing until Baekhyun decided to check.

Yeol: Did you hear?

Jonginie: hear what?

Dae: I've heard it too!

Junmyeon hyung: can someone tell me what's happening?

Sehuniee: I think I know.

Minseokie hyung: will you speak up now?

Yeol: I can type but can't speak on msg hyung!

Minseokie hyung: I wish I could hit you through the phone.

Lay hyung: chanyeol just tell us.

Yeol: okay I heard y/n got bullied.

Baekhyun stood up from his chair as soon as he read it, everyone turned to him and gave him weird looks.

"Baekhyun-ah, are you okay?" His prof asked him and he nodded not long the class ended and he rushed out of the classroom before slunging his bag over his shoulder.

He unlocked his phone and started typing while walking and met kyungsoo outside with a worried look.

Baekhyun: what do you mean bullied? How?

Sehun: hyung don't worry, lauren tried to bully her but y/n fought back very well.

Kyungjaa: how did you know? Were you there?"

Yeol: I just heard it but sehuniee said someone recorded a video but anyway y/n snapped at lauren thoㅋㅋ.

After reading the last message Baekhyun felt relieved but still he was furious at Lauren for even trying to hurt you.

"What are you thinking?" Kyungsoo placed his hand on baekhyun's shoulder.

"I have to go somewhere." Baekhyun's tone was stern and Kyungsoo got that where he was going.

He nodded. "Just be careful."

Baekhyun gave him a little nod before storming out and kyungsoo sighed then went to his friends.

***

"That y/n! Who does she think she is!" Lauren fumed as she was walking back and forth recalling the scene earlier.

"Lauren calm down, maybe we really shouldn't have done that." Her friend told her and Lauren glared at her before sitting across of her.

"What do you mean we shouldn't have! That y/n-". She yelped as someone slamed the table, slowly looking up to see her eyes met Baekhyun's fiery eyes.

"Oh Baekhyun sunbae." She smiled sweetly at him, forgetting her anger.

Baekhyun scoffed as he stood up straight. "Really? You're smiling? After what you did."

"What do you mean?" She made a innocent face at him.

"Don't play dumb with me, it doesn't suit you." He grunted. "Why the hell you tried to hurt y/n?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh so it's y/n huh! Sunbae, how can you take her side when because of her Rowoon broke up with me." She faked her cry.

"Stop this drama when you're in the fault, and stop dragging y/n into this." Baekhyun retorted, pointing his index finger at her.

"Just who is she huh! Is there something going on between you two?" She scowled.

Baekhyun glared at her. "Whatever it is, that's none of your business and I'm warning you, stay far away from y/n or else you know what can I do."

Lauren gulped in fear and Baekhyun smirked before dashing off from the cafeteria.

Well, Sehun and Jongin's blabbing mouth was good for something useful.

***

2:24 pm

You were standing behind the counter with Baekhyun beside you, as he took the order from the customer you started making the drink, finishing it you gave it to him and he went out.

Baekhyun glanced at you. "Are you okay? I heard what happened today."

You sighed. "Did I got famous already?"

He chuckled. "Actually, " With that he pulled out his phone from his pocket before unlocking it and showed you a video of the scene happened in the cafeteria, but luckily only your back can be seen.

"What's this?" You gasped, holding the phone with your hand over his hand but you were too imersed in the video to notice it, however, Baekhyun did, his heart beat increased as you were standing close to him and instead of video, he was staring at you.

"Who posted this video?" You asked, still watching it and Baekhyun who was busy staring at you, didn't heard it and not getting his response you looked up and froze as you realized how close you both were standing.

His eyes boring into yours intently, as he didn't looked away nor you did with your heart was pounding rapidly and heat reached you face as you both kept staring until hearing some laughing sound you both snapped out and looked away before making distance between eachother.

Baekhyun cleared his throat awkwardly. "Um, did you ask something?"

You gulped before nodding. "Uh, yeah, who posted this video?" With a speedy heart you managed to ask.

"Someone posted this on our college blog." He told and you looked at him in shock. "College blog? You mean everyone can watch this? And what if someone shares it?"

"Y/n, what's wrong?" Baekhyun looked at you worringly.

You sighed. "It's just, if my family saw this, they would get too worried plus this is just getting attention and I don't want that."

Baekhyun nodded in understanding. "Don't worry, we'll do something and by the way you really fought back well."

You let out a awkward laugh. "Yeah, I'm a little impatient maybe."

He pretended to think. "Hm, so I also should be careful."

You shrugged, smiling. "Maybe."

He laughed. "You were great there." He patted your head before going in the kitchen leaving you there froze in your spot.

Smiling, Baekhyun went inside the kitchen before typing something on his phone.

Baekhyun - Sehun-ah, there's something you have to do.

________________

@wooya1224 @buttercupbbh @jddcfc-blog

#bbh #exo fanfiction #exo ff #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun gifs #baekhyun imagines #baekhyun #baekhyun x reader

21 notes · View notes

quokkacore · 4 years ago

Text

you stole my star [kim junmyeon]

summary: ‘defeat the bad guys, save the universe, get the guy.’ that’s how it’s supposed to work, and you intend to follow it in that exact order, because it seems pretty complicated to not do it that way. but your team leader, junmyeon, makes you want to throw the entire plan out the window.

pairing: blackpaladin!kim junmyeon x gender neutral redpaladin!reader

genre: voltron!au, sci-fi, angst with a happy ending, i guess?

warnings: language, mentions of torture, war, and violence, implied self hatred, implied ptsd, mentions of attempted self injury, slight body horror?, mentions of amputations and forced body modification (reader is forcibly experimented on and given a prosthetic arm)

song rec: daft crush - instant crush (feat. julian casablancas) ♡ coldplay (feat. rihanna) - princess of china

word count: 1.8k

a/n: this was originally posted to my old writing blog on november 30th, 2018. at the time i loved the voltron reboot and was still optimistic that the final season wouldn’t suck. for those of you who don’t know what voltron is: voltron is a giant mech robot formed by five smaller robots in the shape of lions. each lion is piloted by a paladin, and the lion chooses their paladin according to the traits the person possesses.

masterlist

The training room was where you spent most of your free time, nowadays. You missed the days where you were able to throw yourself into bed and not get up until your body odor demanded you take a shower.

The training sequence you were currently practicing with was programmed for hand to hand combat. The drone you were fighting against was pushing you to your limits, feeling your muscles strain with every punch and kick you threw. You were quick to calculate when to dodge the punches the drone threw, when to step back when the drone advanced.

The drone advanced, and you took your opportunity, throwing a punch, followed by a kick to the stomach. The machine fell to the ground, but before you could finish, someone interrupted you.

“End training sequence.”

The drone vanished as it registered the command, and you rested your hands on your knees, lowering your head as you recognized the voice. “I almost had it there, you know,” You muttered bitterly, between pants. You heard him shift behind you.

“I know you did. But I needed to talk to you.”

You remained in your position for a few seconds, catching your breath, before standing back up straight and turning to face your leader.

Junmyeon had been your best friend, back on Earth, back at the academy where you both trained to be deep space pilots. Everything changed when the blue lion was found on earth, and you all realized Baekhyun was its pilot. It led you to the castle, which was also the ship you currently resided in, and eventually, to the rest of the lions that formed the mightiest weapon in the universe: Voltron.

As Baekhyun was destined to be the blue lion’s paladin, Sehun was to be the green lion’s paladin, Yixing the yellow lion’s paladin, and you the red lion’s paladin. Junmyeon had been destined for the black lion, the biggest one, making him the leader of the paladins by default.

“What is it?” You asked irritably, walking past him, pulling on your jacket and grabbing the bottle of water you always carried with you during training, both of which were next to each other on the floor next to the wall.

You eyed him warily as you uncapped the bottle, taking a long sip. He was still wearing his armor, black and white, fitting against his built, lithe body. His hair, slightly mussed from having worn his helmet, was sticking up in a few different directions. He looked rugged, handsome as always. But you were still pissed at him, regardless of how handsome he looked.

“I wanted to apologize,” He murmured, not meeting your gaze as he crossed his arms. You lowered the water bottle feeling a few drops fall down your chin as you leaned against the wall. You frowned and mirrored his posture as you crossed your arms as well.

“Jun, I get it,” You replied gruffly, pulling out the hair tie that was holding your hair up, “You’re under a lot of fucking stress. You’re the leader of the resistance against the Red Forces, and everyone looks up to you for guidance. I get that. But what you said? Calling me useless in front of the others, in the middle of a dogfight like that? Fucked up. Fucked. Up. I’m your second in command, Jun. I think I deserve a little more respect than that.”

“Why do you think I’m coming to apologize for!?” He fired back, immediately defensive. He was angry, you could tell, even as he looked down, and you shifted your gaze elsewhere. “You think I’m proud of the fact that I said that? I don’t, Y/N, not at all.”

His voice cracked, and you looked back to him, in shock. “Jun—”

“You’re not useless,” He insisted, voice quiet,” I was freaking out about what was happening. It’s the first time you’re in major combat since— since—”

He didn’t finish, but he didn’t need to. You knew what he meant.

About a year ago, you’d been captured in a major battle between the Red Forces and the Voltron Coalition. The months before your rescue were harrowing, full of torture and using you as their little lab rat. It didn’t cost you your life, but it did cost you your left arm.

Your left arm, which had been replaced with new RF tech in an experiment they’d performed on you. It wasn’t your arm. It was a piece of disgusting metal that was attached to your body and you hated it, almost as much as you hated the Red Forces themselves.

Ever since your return the team had been tiptoeing around you, especially Junmyeon. You were grateful for it, the first month or two, giving you your space and letting you recover, but the more time went on, the more restless you became, missions that could have been done much faster with your help became more tedious and dangerous as you were told to stay in the castle.

You were left behind with the others, Chanyeol, Minseok, Jongdae, Jongin, and Kyungsoo, all aliens of the same race whose planet had been destroyed by the Red Forces, to wait, and to be treated like glass began to put you on edge, until very recently when decided that it was time for you to rejoin the fight.

“Jun, I…” You lowered your head, sighing. “I get that you’re scared, I’m scared too. But I have to do this, not just for my sake, but for the sake of us. The universe.”

His hardened gaze was aimed towards the floor, but you could still see the uneasiness in it.

“Do you remember the medical assessment Chanyeol performed on you once we rescued you?”

Chanyeol was the head medical chief aboard the ship. You furrowed your eyebrows, trying to recall.

Truth be told, your memory of the rescue, before it began, during, and after it ended, was fuzzy. Subconsciously, you’d forced it to the back of your mind, not wanting to remember the traumatic events that occurred. If Chanyeol had performed a medical assessment on you, which sounded logical, you couldn’t recall.

You shook your head, telling him this. He shut his eyes, and shuddered.

“I don’t think you’d fully realized what they’d done to your arm until that moment when Chanyeol asked you to move your fingers, because he wanted to see how the arm worked.“

He was looking at you now, the look in his eyes grim, pained. You could feel his breath fanning your face. When had he gotten so much closer to you?

“Y-you started crying and screaming, freaking out. Before long, we had to restrain you, because you were trying to pull it out with your other hand. We didn’t want you to hurt yourself. I couldn’t let you hurt yourself, more than you already were.”

You didn’t say anything, because you could feel your throat tightening.

“Y/N, you’re the red paladin. The red paladins are always the toughest ones, the ones that keep it together when everything is going to shit. It’s why we work so well together, if I freak out about something I know you’ll be there to help me through it. To see you like that, I…”

He didn’t finish.

You looked up to finally face him, and the tears in his eyes were prominent, but he immediately began blinking them away.

“I panicked today, because I didn’t want them to take you away from me again. A-away from all of us.”

“Jun,” You mumbled, voice weak. He paused. You began subconsciously counting the seconds that passed.

Three… four… five…

Junmyeon surged forward, engulfing you in a hug. His armor was cold against your skin, and you could smell the faint metallic smell that came from it. He smelled like the body wash he’d picked up in an alien trading post a few months ago, the one that made him smell like incense.

You shut your eyes tightly, arms coming up to embrace him as well.

“I’m so, so sorry, Y/N,” He whispered, “And I know what I said isn’t justified but I don’t want you to think that I think—”

“Junmyeon?”

“Y-yeah?”

“Shut up for a minute, please.”

He didn’t answer, for which you were grateful. You willed your body to relax, your stiff limbs sighing in relief as you slumped against the black paladin.

You weren’t quite sure how long you stayed like that. But when you did break away, you could see that you were both crying. You sniffled, scrunching up your nose, before opening your mouth to speak. He did the same.

“I love you.”

“I’m still mad at you.”

Your eyes widened at his revelation, heartbeat accelerating rapidly. “What?”

Junmyeon licked his dry lips, eyebrows raised. “I said,” He murmured softly, as his words were only for you, “I love you.”

You stared at him, mouth agape.

“J-Junmyeon, I…”

You weren’t quite sure how to respond. Sehun had always teased you about how you two made “googly eyes” at each other when the other wasn’t looking, but you always thought it was just his overactive imagination. On Junmyeon’s part, at least.

One of his hands left your back to come up to your face. His gloved hand wiped away one of the tears that had fallen down your face, and you sighed as the rough material dragged against your skin.

“I know it’s a bad time,” He explained, shaking his head, “What with the universe depending on us to save it, and all. But never for a second have I ever thought that you aren’t the one for me.”

You inhaled softly, a sad smile ghosting across your face. “Jun, I… I don’t know if I can do this, right now.”

His face fell, and he began to pull away from you, but you grabbed his face to keep him in place. His nose brushed against yours, and you gulped in anticipation. His face was unreadable, eyes gazing into yours earnestly, sadly.

“C-can I kiss you? Just this once?” He murmured, resting his forehead against yours.

You nodded, drunk off of his proximity. “P-please, Junmyeon…”

His lips were soft, gentle, and warm against yours, and you felt he was trying not to overstep your boundaries, not too harsh or overbearing. His hands pulled you slightly closer as yours gripped his face tighter than before. He hummed into the kiss, and you hummed back, hands going to run through his dark, already mussed up hair.

You pulled away slowly, slightly out of breath. You exhaled shakily, well aware of what you’d just done. “Junmyeon, we can’t. N-not right now.”

He nodded, but didn’t let you go. You didn’t want him to, anyway. But the moment you left this training room, it wasn’t Y/N and Junmyeon, it was the red and black paladins, leaders of the Voltron Coalition. If you decided to go through with a relationship, you risked ruining your friendship, as well as the whole way the both of you ran the rebellion against the Red Forces. It was simply too much of a risk.

“But if you’re willing to wait for me, Jun…” You murmured, meeting his melancholy stare. He nodded, soft smile returning.

“I will, Y/N. Promise.”

#kpop x reader #exo x reader #junmyeon x reader #suho x reader #kpop angst #exo angst #suho angst #kpop scenarios #exo scenarios #suho scenarios #junmyeon scenarios #my writing

43 notes · View notes

xingplytwelve · 4 years ago

Text

𝒷𝒶𝒸𝓀𝓈𝓉𝒶𝑔𝑒

Author’s Note: Requested by @kaydne, I hope you’ll enjoy it! ♡ I’m so sorry I got way too carried away while writing this asdfghjkl, I’ve always wanted to write about One & Only water stage and the requested Idol!AU, established R/S!AU just fits in so perfectly!!! (sorz I had to repost this to fix an error!) Pairing: Yixing x Reader Genre/ AU: Fluff, Smut, Idol AU Rating/ Warnings: NC-17 Word Count: 2.6k

You softened immediately the moment your boyfriend showed you his disappointed expression by accident when you told him that you won’t be able to make it for the final concert of the tour. Realising that he was probably too obvious in showing his emotions, he then added quickly, ‘it’s okay baby, I know you’re busy preparing for your comeback and you’ll also be rooting for me even though you won’t be there physically!’ You had to hide your chuckle, not because of how he was trying his best to be positive, but because you knew you how bad you were at lying, and hiding secrets. Of course you’ll be there for the concert, you just wanted to surprise him. But knowing him, he’ll believe anything you said. ‘I’m sorry, yixing. I’ll make it up to you when we’re finally able to meet, alright?’ You cooed. ‘Manager is calling me for dance practice, I’ll FaceTime you tomorrow again ok?’ You added, before hanging up the call.

‘y/n can’t come for our final show?’ Baekhyun asked, quite doubtfully in fact, when he noticed how crestfallen yixing looked after ending the video call. Yixing nodded, but knowing how he couldn’t hide anything from baekhyun did cracked him up a little. He couldn’t even recall the last time you guys met in person, it was always conflicting schedules between you two and so challenging to find a time where y'all can meet. Even though the two of you make it a point to call each other everyday, it was just different. Yixing was just dying to have you in his arms, and not to mention to have himself inside you. ‘y/n is busy… I should be more understanding, right?’ Yixing whined. Baekhyun simply laughed at how simple-minded yixing was, that he didn’t find it suspicious that his girlfriend of two years who had never missed any of their concerts told him that she’s not attending just a few days before, before reassuring, ‘don’t worry! I’m sure you guys will be able to meet soon. I haven’t seen Belle for quite some time too.’

It was the day of the concert and you were already making your way there slightly earlier than usual, to meet the rest. To avoid the unnecessary attention, you had put on a cap and a mask, though you were wearing the hoodie that yixing had left at your place the last time he stayed over, since you knew that he loved seeing you in his clothes. ‘I thought you wasn’t coming!’ Jongdae’s wife exclaimed, their adorable daughter, now a toddler, clinging onto her calves shyly. ‘you believed her?!’ Belle asked in disbelief, trying her best to control her laughter. It’s no wonder that she’s baekhyun’s girlfriend, they fit together perfectly, just like puzzle pieces. ‘I’m just trying to surprise my silly boyfriend okay, come on!’ You answered the both of them, as you guys started making your way in to the concert hall. You heard some girls mumbling among themselves as they stared at you, so you simply pulled down your cap a little more hoping that you’ll go unnoticed. ‘When was the last time you met yixing?’ Belle asked, while waiting for the concert to start. ‘It’s been super long, I can’t remember… I missed him so much,’ you confessed, and as much as you love seeing yixing on stage, you just couldn’t wait for the concert to end already, so that you can finally get some time with him. ‘It must have been extra hard for you with your schedules… I missed baek too,’ belle said as she leaned on your shoulder playfully. ‘This lucky women gets to spend time with her Jongdae every single day, I’m so envious!’ She then whispered to you. And both of you ended up laughing while the other was still busy with her daughter.

The concert started with their title tracks over the years, and it was soon the various performances by the vocal and dance lines. The two of them went nuts the moment jongdae and baekhyun were on stage, along with Kyungsoo performing moonlight, with belle constantly hitting your arm and screaming, ‘that’s my boyfriend! Did you see how he hit his high notes?!’ You simply nodded, as you waited patiently for yixing’s stage with jongin and sehun. The stage was clouded, while water started to tide as the boys exchanged stages. The beat dropped, and all you could see was how yixing was moving so elegantly, and yet still so powerfully when he brings out those dance moves. He was soaked from the water falling above, from head to toe, his shirt sticking onto his fair skin but he still does every single step so effortlessly. It was as though he wasn't even thinking, his body just moved along naturally to the music, and you were truly mesmerised, no matter how many times you’ve seen it. As the song comes to an end, as if how soaked he was wasn’t sexy enough, he decided to rip his shirt apart, and the whole hall just went crazy, while the two girls gave you a cheeky look which you didn’t noticed, because you were still so into it. All you could think about was if only he was doing what he did earlier on onto you.

Very soon, the concert was ending, and it was just left with the members saying a few words to the fans. Suho was the one who started off first, but as usual, the members was fooling around and not listening to him. Jongdae was up next, thanking the members, the fans, and of course his dear wife, in which the camera had her up on the big screen. You saw baekhyun whispering something to yixing, before taking over from jongdae and that was when yixing looked in your direction. The expression he had when he realised you had tricked him was priceless, and you couldn’t help but to laugh under your mask. Yixing was still in shock when it was his turn to speak, not knowing what to say probably, but baekhyun nudged him again to get him started. ‘This is our final show for the tour and I am extremely grateful to those who are here today to watch all of us. To the members, and the fans, nothing can express my gratitude. And also, I was stunned for awhile because my girlfriend said she couldn’t make it today because of her upcoming promotions, but there she is,’ yixing said, as he pointed towards you. The fans were going crazy at how sweet he was, as you heard awws everywhere. You wasn’t expecting this, but as the camera turned to you, you stood up, removing your cap and mask as you bowed. ‘Shall we get y/n to come up on stage?!’ Baekhyun shouted into his mic and handed it towards the crowd he moment he finished his sentence. You gave belle a small frown, but she simply shrugged her shoulders. It had been a year since you and yixing announced your relationship to the public, and you were so glad that there’s not much of hate going around. Both his and your fans were really supportive, and you were really thankful for that. Yixing passed his mic to you when you were up on stage, which you quickly took and said before bowing, ‘thank you to everyone who has been supporting exo and yixing. Please continue to give them more love!’ Yixing was smiling like a child when you passed the mic back, whispering, ‘you’re so hot in my clothes. See you later baby.’ ‘Please give y/n lots of love too!’ Yixing said, right before you went down the stage. You were swamped with fans requesting for autographs and selfies the moment the concert ended, which you had tried your best to complied, before being brought backstage by the security guards.

Yixing was waiting for you, and you fastened your pace as you walked towards him, pouncing onto him the moment you were close enough. ‘I missed you so much, baby. You lied to - ’ he started out, but you just couldn’t wait for him to finish his sentence before crushing your lips on his. You held his face with both hands as you let him entered your mouth, and just when the both of you were enjoying this moment after god knows when, you both heard jongdae, ‘Please guys, we have children around!’ Both of you parted away from each other, and you found yourself blushing when you opened your eyes to see jongdae just a few steps away, covering his daughter’s eyes, chuckling. You buried your face in the crook of yixing’s neck, while he turned around slightly to face jongdae, sticking his tongue out at him. ‘Looks like we have to take this somewhere else,’ yixing whispered, before heading into his dressing room, locking the door after. ‘You can put me down now yixing,’ you said, leaning back a little to look at him. Yixing gave you a frown, as he said sternly, ‘oh hell no, you’ve been naughty.’ You knew clearly what he meant by that, but here? Really? Yixing then walked towards the makeup table, and sat you down on it, before leaning closer for another kiss when you stopped him. ‘Here?’ You asked, quite reluctant at the idea. Yixing gave you a nod, his left hand finding it’s way into your inner thighs, squeezing against your flesh without even giving you the time to respond. You whimpered at his touch, and you told yourself to just screw it. ‘exciting, isn’t it? Ideal for a bad girl like you,’ yixing teased, before giving you a deep and breath-taking kiss. His right hand was gradually making it’s way up under your hoodie, or rather, his hoodie. You moaned lightly the moment his thumb started rubbing against your clothed nipple.

‘Enjoying yourself?’ Yixing asked seductively. You had almost rolled your eyes at how obvious the answer to his question was, and seeing that you refused to answer him, he stopped. ‘Yixing… Continue please,’ you begged, before adding, ‘I want more, yixing, my clasp is in front.’ Yixing smirked, his gaze fixated on you as he unclasped your bra, before continuing what he was doing just like you’ve requested. He then groped your breast after a few more rubs, making you gasped. His fingers were running up and down your entrance, and sensing that you probably couldn’t care less anymore, he hooked his index finger onto the waistband of your lacy panties, and pulled them down slowly, before flinging them across the room once they were entirely off. You rested your palms on the edge of the makeup table as your body weakened from yixing circling his thumb around your already wet folds, your chest heaving from the fast breaths. Just then, you heard a loud moan escaping from the other room. You looked at yixing, and you knew he heard it too. Realising that it must have been baek and belle, both of you giggled, as yixing sneered, ‘great minds think alike huh? But I’ll pleasure you so much, that you’ll be louder than that, baby.’ He started leaving kisses on your neck, sucking onto your delicate skin gently, mindful not leave any markings behind. He moved his way up, to your jaw, before running his tongue over your lips playfully and giving you an affectionate kiss while his fingers worked it’s magic against your entrance. ‘HNGGGG,’ you screamed when yixing inserted his digit into you while you were still immersed in his kisses, taking you by surprise. ‘that’ll show em,’ yixing mumbled, parting away as he continued pumping. It didn’t take long for him to shove the second one inside you, his fingers now deep and curving within you. Your back arches uncontrollably, as your hands started moving from the table edge to the hems of yixing’s t-shirt, clenching onto them. You were already chasing your high just from yixing’s fingers, you can’t imagine how good it’ll feel when he finally grinds himself into you. Your grip tighten on his shirt, the hems soon twisted around in a messy fashion when you felt your own release. Yixing then withdrew himself from you, while you were still shaking slightly, recovering from your orgasm. Another smirk was hanging on yixing’s face as he looked at what you left all over his fingers, before licking them clean while he kept his eyes on you. But while he was doing so, you just couldn’t help but to notice his growing bulge, waiting to be freed. Just as yixing was about done, you released your grip from his shirt, as you moved downwards, giving his shaft a squeeze, making him groaned.

You then helped him removed his pants, watching his cock being released as you waited for him to fuck you in anticipation. Yixing placed his hands on your knees, spreading your legs wider than they already were, so wide, that you had to resist a cry. His face was barely itches away from yours with his cock brushing against you lightly, as he asked, ‘are you ready for me?’ You nodded in desperation, hoping that yixing will take you right now, but he denied, ‘use your words, baby.’ ‘yes yixing, I need you inside me now, I need you so bad,’ you pleaded. ‘as you wished,’ yixing said, pleased, before slamming himself into you. You moaned, clearly audible even to the room beside yixing’s. ‘you’re doing so well,’ yixing mumbled as he grinds his hips against you. ‘yixing… this was all I can think about during your stage just now…’ you purred as he continued thrusting at a rhythmic pace. You pulled him closer by his shoulders, clinging onto him as you moved your hips along, making it easier for him to hit your sweet spot. Just as his thrusts were getting erratic, he grabbed your legs, pinning your ankles down to the table edge and used them as a support, instead of letting your legs dangle around freely. You whimpered at his strength, and your fingers raked through his hair as he continued thrusting inside you hard. You could sensed your second one approaching, your walls tightening around him and you knew yixing was close too. The way he moves and how he bit his lips, you just knew it. ‘fuck baby, I’m gonna cum,’ yixing said in between breaths. You held onto his arms, stopping him the moment you felt he was about to pull out, even though you knew the obvious reasons why he was going to. You had told him once that your period was late, and that you were so afraid, and ever since then, you guys always had protected sex, or he’ll pull out. But just for tonight, you wanted him to fill you up. ‘cum inside me, yixing,’ you murmured, neediness overflowing from your voice. The dressing room echoed with moans, and yixing’s cursing as both of you reaches your high. He released your ankles, hands now resting on your thighs as he catches his breath.

You pulled him in for a hug, before saying, ‘I feel so good, yixing. I missed you.’ Yixing smiled, as he planted a kiss on your forehead while caressing your cheeks. ‘me too, baby. Remember to take the pill, ok?’ Yixing reminded, his loving touch now turned into a light pinch, making you pout. ‘We’re leaving, bye yixing! Bye y/n!’ Baekhyun and belle shouted from outside. ‘Bye! Whatever happened backstage stays at the backstage yah!’ Yixing turned away from you slightly as he answered back. ‘Let’s order in supper at my place?’ You asked the moment he turned back, hands interlocked with his, refusing to let them go. ‘I’ll love that,’ yixing said with a grin as he pressed his forehead against yours, before adding, ‘then I’ll have you again, as a midnight snack.’

#exo fanfics #exosnet #exowritersnet #yixing fluff #yixing smut #yixing x reader #yixing fanfiction #yixing scenario #yixing #zhang yixing #requested #layonyixing writes

29 notes · View notes

severetimetravelnerd · 4 years ago

Text

Hatred and Love (ft. G Dragon) Mafia AU

Part 11

Jiyong sees the start of a surprising new movement.

(I don’t own any of the images used. All credit goes to the original owners.)

Taglist:

@unabashedturkeytreeslime

@happiestgirlontheeastcoast

@kwonnansi

@aarfyie

@suhappysuho

If there is anyone else who would like to be tagged, you can comment or leave me a message :))

I only write on this blog on tumblr, so if you see my work on any other platform, please let me know immediately.

Now, things start to switch up with EXO. It has appearances from Daesung, Taeyang, TOP, Mino, Hanbin and EXO (mostly Kai). This continues with the EXO storyline, but again, I have nothing against EXO :)) I love them, but I had to use someone for the plot. This chapter has the introduction of the other EXO members.

Warnings: Violence, Death(not main character), Injury, Blood, Eventual smut, Abduction, Guns and Knives, language.

————————————————————————–

One would think you’d be happier. Safer. At peace. You had moved out of that house and were staying at Hanbin’s apartment. You had gotten away from the toxic environment. You were no longer being used as a tool between the two gangs. You were away from the violence. You were away from Jiyong. You hated it. You never believed in those ‘fleeting connections that last a lifetime’, but you couldn’t handle being away from Jiyong. You loved him too much to leave him. You wanted to put yourself first, and you did, but somehow, you felt like you were losing out by pushing him away. You tried to keep your mind off things. You tried to feel grateful, but honestly, as you went about your day, the only feeling you had was one of great longing.

Jiyong, on the other hand, was living a weird life. He focused all his sadness and loss into defeating EXO, but when he wasn’t working, he was just so hopelessly lost. Only his closest friends saw him in that condition because if anyone else did, they would have thought he had gone insane. He lost the will to do anything, simply staring at things all day, desperately clinging on to memories of you. He began spending his evenings alone in his room, slowly putting together albums of the two of you together from the blurry, sleepy selfies on his phone. It was the only way he saw you. He was about to go to bed one night when Youngbae burst in again. Jiyong, eyes dead, stared at him, hoping desperately it was not for any reason like the last time, but more than anything else, Youngbae seemed confused. Puzzled, he said,

“Jiyong, you need to see this.”

And gestured down the stairs. Jiyong quickly bound his hands, not wanting to get bloody knuckles and followed him, prepared to harm anyone who posed a threat to you and your safety. He only stopped to think when he saw Jongdae, Baekhyun and Chanyeol sitting there, bound and gagged to three chairs

Jiyong sat down across from them, seeing their eyes unwillingly fill up with fear. A while ago, he would have enjoyed it, but now, things were different. He took a long, hard look at the three of them. Jongdae had a wife and a child. Baekhyun was known to be bad at fighting. Chanyeol tried to keep away from violence. Why would those three turn themselves in to him? He uncuffed his shirt and got up, moving closer to them. He walked up to them and while he only reached out to remove Baekhyun’s gag, Baekhyun flinched. For the first time ever, he took on a soft voice while dealing with mafia.

“Relax. I’m just removing this so you can talk.”

They just watched him suspiciously when he moved on to remove Chanyeol’s and Jongdae’s gags as well. Jiyong slowly walked back and sat down, crossing his legs and staring at them. He lit up a cigarette and said,

“So, would you care to explain to me why the three of you came here, unarmed and unbugged, to meet me? I would have said you had a death wish, but if that were the case, you would have tried to provoke me already.”

Baekhyun nervously nodded at Jongdae and Chanyeol, and started,

“We have a proposition.”

Not looking up, Jiyong stared at the cigarette in his hand, remembering the last time you told him to quit.

“What proposition?”

Jongdae spoke up, the only vaguely calm voice out of the three of them.

“EXO is suffering serious losses because of Joonmyeon hyung’s insistence on fighting you guys. We know we’re the ones who started it, because Y/N was never Jongin’s girlfriend.”

He paused, his voice sounding ever so slightly pained.

“And EXO has changed. Joonmyeon hyung can’t see what his spite towards you is doing to everyone around him.”

Jiyong looked up and met Jongdae’s gaze.

“We’ve left EXO to join you. We think it’ll be better for both groups if we merge.”

Jiyong laughed.

“You said it yourself. EXO is suffering serious losses. How would it help me in any way to merge with you?”

Baekhyun and Jongdae both flinched at that, but Chanyeol spoke up for the first time. Eyes dead serious, he said,

“It would stop the bloodshed.”

Jiyong’s smile was wiped off his face. That was worrying him. Although he was clearly winning over EXO, a lot of his men had suffered injuries. Mino was walking around with a stab wound. You were unsafe. He had to put an end to it somehow. Chanyeol continued.

“We also have numbers.”

He turned and looked at the other two. Gulping, he decided to take a risk. He didn’t know whether the others would follow their path, but it was worth a shot.

“Minseok hyung and Kyungsoo will join you in a while. With us, all our men will also come here. You know we were good at what we did before we started this war with you.”

Jiyong, eyes deadly, took out his knife and asked,

“How do you know I won’t kill you for coming here?”

Chanyeol, eyes confident, replied,

“Because you didn’t kill Jongin.”

Jiyong’s eyes turned cold.

“Jongin saved the person who means the most to me in the world.”

Although his heart was pounding out of his chest, Chanyeol replied.

“And that same person changed you for the better. You don’t kill needlessly anymore.”

Jiyong just stared at him, silent. He looked down at the cigarette in his hand, suddenly squashing it. You did ask him to quit. He stared at the crushed cigarette, thinking about how before he met you, he would have killed someone for saying that. After he met you though, it made him feel better that he couldn’t kill needlessly. That meant he had less chances of hurting you, after all. He sighed. Chanyeol was right. He stood up, about to walk out of the door when Jongin burst in, panting.

“Jiyong hyung, don’t kill them. Please.”

With a wry smile on his face, Jiyong said,

“Who said I’m going to kill them?”

He turned to the two men standing guard.

“Go untie them and show them the two free apartments near Hanbin’s place. Treat them well. They’re your brothers now.”

Jongin couldn’t believe his ears. He was terrified Jiyong had an ulterior motive. He ran and caught Jiyong’s hand.

“Hyung, they’re not going to give away EXO secrets. Don’t torture them for it.”

Jiyong turned around with a slight smile on his face.

“Jongin, if they had come here telling me they’d spill all of EXO’s secrets, I’d have shot them right there. We don’t need people I can’t trust here.”

A month later and Chanyeol was proven right. Minseok and Kyungsoo did join them after a while. They couldn’t handle Joonmyeon, Sehun and Yixing ruining EXO right in front of them for their obsession with Jiyong. No one in EXO could handle seeing their friends lose touch with reality and become worse by the day. They decided to merge with Jiyong’s gang, but only on one condition. Even if they do catch Joonmyeon, Yixing and Sehun, no one would harm them. They would be welcomed too. EXO liked working with Jiyong. They liked the people there. Of course, they knew something was wrong with Jiyong because he just became a shell of the man he once was, but they also saw the ways you had changed him. He was a better person after meeting you, not that you had ever asked him to change for you. He wanted to become your safe space. He never wanted to see you scared of him again. He never wanted to cause you pain. He wanted to be the kind of person you wouldn’t question yourself for loving. And so, he stopped killing without reason. He stopped seeming so unapproachable. He looked into the moral grounds of the jobs he took. Sure, that might make him less popular, but everyone knew he was the best in the business. He would just work harder to protect what he already had. He changed a lot, but one thing did not change. He would take the most ruthless of decisions to get what he wanted. And what he wanted right then was to stop Joonmyeon, Yixing and Sehun because the longer they were around, they more danger you were in. He kept on pushing them relentlessly, never giving them a moment to catch their breath. He was forcing them into being careless, and the more careless they were, the faster he would catch them. He had to. He had to keep you safe. He had pinky promised you that he would.

Jiyong knew that he didn’t want to live a life without you, but he couldn’t be so selfish to ask you to come back, knowing fully well how risky that would be for you and how sad it would make you. He hated his life without you, but he thought he should be proud of his decision to accept that he was bad for you and let you go. If that were the case though, why did he feel so bad about it? Why were you the only thing keeping him going? It was impossible for the people close to him to miss the fact that he had changed. They were all worried sick about him. He was obsessively trying to stop EXO so that you weren’t in danger. He wasn’t sleeping. He was barely eating. He was not himself anymore. Youngbae couldn’t say anything, because no matter how many times he tried telling Jiyong to go talk to you, he refused, saying he wasn’t going to be selfish. Mino, Daesung and Seunghyun; they had all tried talking to him, but he didn’t listen to any of them, telling them that it was better for you if you were away from him. The only one who hadn’t said anything to him was Hanbin. Hanbin was conflicted. He didn’t know what to do. He was so bloody furious with his hyung when he first heard what he said to you. He was pained. He was pained his hyung couldn’t keep his promise to you. He thought it would be better for you this way, especially if Jiyong had lied to you about not killing your uncle. He thought you were getting a better shot at life. But he was wrong. He was watching you waste away, little by little, as you became more lost. Jiyong was the first person you had ever felt that way about. You loved him too much. You couldn’t handle being away from him. You couldn’t handle not knowing whether he came home safe at the end of the night. You couldn’t handle not being able to wake up and crawl into his arms in the morning. You didn’t want to admit it, but you were struggling to get through the day. And Hanbin didn’t want to see that. As it is, he was struggling from seeing his hyung like that. He also found out his hyung hadn’t killed your uncle. Youngbae hyung told him that although your uncle had been killed, it was another gang that did. your uncle owed them money. Jiyong was just getting the blame for it. If you weren’t doing better without him, then there was no point. He needed to talk to Jiyong. He needed to tell his hyung that you needed him back.

It was late, meaning Jiyong hyung would be tired. Hanbin gulped. That’s not the best-case scenarios, but he needed to tell him. After all, it was a long overdue conversation. He knocked on the door. He heard Jiyong voice, sounding tired. That wasn’t a good sign. Hanbin winced. Oh well, he had to go ahead with it anyway.

“Hyung?”

“Come in.”

Hanbin walked in a little hesitantly, surprised to see Jiyong pouring over floor plans of a building. It was Joonmyeon’s supposed hideout. Jiyong looked up and gave Hanbin a small smile. This was the first time Hanbin had come to see him since you left.

“What is it Hanbin?”

Hanbin took a deep breath.

“Hyung… you know something? Y/N hates you.”

Jiyong flinched. He knew you didn’t want to be with him, but he hadn’t known you hated him. Hanbin continued.

“You know why? She hates you for letting her go.”

Jiyong’s eyes, for the first time since you left him, lit up. He sounded confused.

“What’re you saying? She was right when she said she shouldn’t be treated that way.”

Hanbin nodded.

“You’re right. No one should be treated that way. But how has that got anything to do with you not stopping her from leaving?”

Jiyong’s eyes were slowly lighting up even more, but he still sounded unsure when he said,

“But she deserves a better life.”

“Why does that have to be without you?”

He still looked a little unsure, but at the same time, he looked like there was nothing he wanted more.

“Hyung, listen to me. She can’t stand living without you. She needs you back. So, go back to her.”

Jiyong looked unsure for a second, but then he decided to give in. He would beg you to take him back. You could make that final decision on your own. He didn’t need to make it for you. Without saying another word, Jiyong got up and started walking down, as though in a trance. He just needed to make it to your apartment. He was about to walk out of the door when he heard a loud slap followed by manic laughter. He heard Sehun’s distinct voice laughing and saying, “You captured Yixing hyung. You may have captured me, but in the process, you fell for our trap. Your precious Y/N, the woman who caused all of this mess? Yeah, she’ll be dead by the time you get to her now. You won’t be able to recognise her after Joonmyeon hyung is done with her.”

37 notes · View notes

wongxiexie · 5 years ago

Text

What meets the eye

Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader Genre: Angst, Demon!AU, X-EXO!AU Word Count: 2.342 words Warnings: Implied death, Mild cursing, A little violence Note: Thank you so much @exo-stentialism for letting me use your gif! 🌸🌸 This is the reader-insert version of this fic.

“Incoming!”

Sehun bellows somewhere far below, warning you and the others of an enormous blazing orb that is fast approaching the destroyed building you’re currently perched on. Exhausted as you are with your muscles aching and lungs burning, you channel what remaining power you have to forge a force field around you and the others within your vicinity.

Pouring all your concentration as you extend your palms forward, you pray to whoever god is listening for you to at least be able to slow the orb down. Begrudgingly, you acknowledge that you’re too weak to fully deflect the attack and just hope that the few seconds you stall will be enough for Jongin to transport everybody to some place safe.

The intensity of the blaze gets stronger and you feel yourself being pushed backwards. Reducing the size of the force field, you focus it on the orb in an effort to direct it to the left and at the last second you let go before jumping towards the opposite direction.

To say that your landing was rough would be an understatement.

Involuntarily, a few drops escape your eyes as you hold your breath before you pull out shards of glass that cut through your suit and embedded themselves on your skin.

“Fuck,” you exhale quietly as you throw the last piece away.

“Are– okay, [Y/N]–,” the grounded earpiece buzzes to life and you stand up before fixing it.

“Has anybody seen [Y/N]?” another voice chimes in, Junmyeon, clearer this time and you let yourself breathe before answering. “I’m okay, but who fired off that one?”

“It was Chanyeøl,” the original, Chanyeol, growls out. “It seems they’re here, and worse, my fire doesn’t seem to affect him at all.”

“What?!”

“I thought it was just Suhø and Sehůn?”

Disbelieving gasps filter through the device and they fire question after question about whether Chanyeol is absolute that the others are here too. You would have also jumped in to ask if it isn’t for the pounding in your ears.

Everything seems to fall out of focus and you find that your concentration is wavering, almost to the point where you feel like you can lose consciousness any second now.

He’s here?

Slightly shaking, you lower yourself to the ground on one knee and press both palms flat on the concrete. You remove your earpiece and let your eyes slide shut as you empty your mind of all thoughts except for one.

A few beats pass with you not being able to sense what you’re looking for and you almost allow yourself a sigh of relief – almost. That is, until you feel a familiar aura.

Instantly, you remove your hands from the ground as if burned and before you can dissolve the field you have created around you, his face flashes in your mind.

Baëkhyun.

He is here.

“[Y/N]…” he drawls out and you dissipate the force field you made before he can say anything else.

It takes everything in you to not run to him. His voice, his face – they are all his, but you know it’s not him.

Standing to your full height, you put the earpiece back in place and panic instantaneously grips you when you hear Jongdae’s frantic shouts. “Where’s Yixing? Minseok and Kyungsoo are hurt!”

A blinding flash of light erupts up above and only then do you notice the stark red and white bolts clashing in the skies. ‘Jongdae needs help!’ You break into a sprint to aid him but as soon as you round the corner, an invisible barrier breaks your momentum.

The wind gets knocked out of your lungs as you’re thrown to the ground. Before you can get up, someone suddenly bends over you and grips your neck in a chokehold.

Struggling to break free, you scratch at the hand that’s trying to suffocate you but a harsh laugh echoes above you and you look up to meet the blank eyes of none other than the most ruthless of the clones, Kāi.

Fear grips tighter at you, tighter than his hold upon the twisted intentions present in his eyes, and you become more frantic to escape from him. “Let me go!”

In your desperation, you claw on the ground as you try to form what force field you can still make, hoping that someone would be able to sense the distress signals you’re giving off.

Sick amusement dances in the clone’s eyes and he moves his face closer to yours, about to scare you further but he gets cut off by a scoff.

“Stop playing around,” Sehůn’s bored voice sounds out. “Just kill her already.”

Kāi is about to do just that, but fortunately for you, Jongin abruptly appears and sends a kick towards his clone’s side. However, Kāi must have sensed his original’s presence because he was able to block the attack with his arms.

Nonetheless, the clone was sent a distance from you because of the impact. Sehun’s voice cuts through to you as he keeps his own clone occupied and he shouts, “get out of here, [Y/N]! Find Yixing so he can restore your power!”

Without hesitation, you nod at them and take off the other way, trusting that they’ll be able to hold their own against their evil incarnates.

You run, trying to find your healer. As much as you don’t want to burden Yixing, you know you’re no help to the other soldiers if you don’t regain your energy.

Yixing stands a little ways away, trying to fend off the enemy with Kyungsoo’s help, and you run faster to reach them. Sprinting towards your comrades, you push yourself to go quicker but your surroundings suddenly throb once and you’re forced to your knees from the whiplash.

As if on instinct, you look off to the side, compelled by some unknown force, and all thoughts flee your mind upon seeing him.

Your lips curl back in hatred and disgust upon seeing the demon that stands a distance from you, his eyes closed and his posture relaxed as if he doesn’t have a care in the world. And for that, you hate him even more because you know he really doesn’t give a fuck about whatever except for his own twisted selfish desires.

None of the clones do, especially him.

Your trembling hand subconsciously moves to clutch the metal vial attached to your necklace and your knuckles turn white from gripping it so tightly.

The anger makes you move and before you even realize it, you’re already running towards him. Eyes dead set on your target, you let the pain and hatred propel you forward, not caring about your beaten body as you accept the lone thought occupying your whole mind.

‘End him.’

As you near him, you swipe the silver dagger resting on your belt. You’re so near, so near, and you grip the knife tighter. His eyes are still closed but at the last moment, you see the unmistakable upward tilt of his lips, it was minute but it was there, and only now do you realize what a reckless decision it is you have made.

Too late to back out now.

You leap forward with the help of your force field and land directly in front of Baëkhyun. In a flash, you raise your hand, poised to attack him, but the moment you slash your hand down to stab his heart…

One second you’re trying to kill the clone that took your love away from you and the next you’re– in a field of flowers?

Confusion swims through your mind and you try to go back to what you were doing before… what were you doing before?

You whip around to look for someone, anyone. Deep inside, your gut tells you that you should panic, but you’re not in the slightest bit alarmed. Looking down, you see you’re wearing the dress Baekhyun bought for you.

‘Ah, silly me, we’re on a date,’ you smile as you remember where you are, laughing slightly at the absurdity of you forgetting what’s happening.

A smile settles on your lips as you approach the tree where your lover is taking cover, his hair peaking as he tries to see whether you’ve figured out where he is hidden.

“I wonder where my wonderfully foolish boyfriend is hiding, hmm?”

At this, Baekhyun’s poorly concealed giggles reach your ears and you join in on his laughter.

“You’re no fun, [Y/N]! You should’ve at least pretended to look for me!” he says in between peals of chuckles. “Can’t help it, Baek. You didn’t even try.”

He opens his arms wide, gesturing for you to run into his embrace and you do just that. You snake your arms around his middle, reveling in the smell that seems so naturally his, and you press your face in the crook of his neck.

You hear Baekhyun chuckle above you and something about it puts an unsettling feeling in your stomach. Raising your head in slight confusion, you look at his face but you find nothing unusual. His face is the same, his smile, his features, nothing seems out of place, even his eyes– wait.

Your own orbs widen upon staring into his eyes and soon enough, the sweet smile that was once on Baekhyun’s face is replaced by a cruel smirk that you recognize all too well.

Bit by bit, your surroundings return to before and you find yourself smack dab in the middle of the battle, with your body trapped in Baëkhyun’s bruising hold.

“So easy to fool,” he whispers in amusement. “Too bad you noticed early, I didn’t know playing goody would be so fun.”

Anger boils within you and you bare your teeth at him as you struggle. “How dare you use him for your sick games!”

Baëkhyun doesn’t appear fazed, in fact, he looks mildly amused. He chuckles darkly and moves his face closer to yours. “Still heartbroken about the fly’s death?” he asks mockingly as he raises a brow.

“I told you I would do anything to make you mine.”

The cold leer on his lips brings you back to reality, making you bring your boot up to stomp on his foot. It’s not much, but it’s enough for Baëkhyun to let up a bit on his hold on you, granting you just enough space to rear your hand back and stab his chest with the dagger.

Baëkhyun staggers backwards and before he gets the chance to retaliate, you pounce on him and pin him to the ground. You pull the vial from your necklace and you hastily open it to reveal Baekhyun’s blood.

The clone’s eyes widen, knowing full well what his original’s blood means, and without hesitation, you pour it on his chest, right where you stabbed him directly on the heart.

Upon contact of the blood, his body convulses wildly, almost as if his bones are breaking one by one and once again, it breaks your heart to see him hurt.

‘It’s not him,’ you remind yourself, but him having the same face, the same everything doesn’t make it easy for you.

Traitorous tears cascade down your cheeks and it takes a huge toll on you just to prevent your sobs from escaping.

After all, you’ve just witnessed your love die a second time, regardless if it was a sinister clone.

As Baëkhyun’s movements stop altogether, his body relaxes and the fight similarly drains from your body. “It’s done, it’s over…” you whisper as you caress his face. “Both of your souls can rest now.”

Bringing your hands to hold his cheeks tenderly, you close your eyes shut and allow yourself one last moment of selfishness.

You let your lips gently touch his and the moment you break contact, your sobs wrack your tired body. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything to save the both of you,” you rest your forehead on his as you let the tears fall.

“Oh baby, that’s no problem for me.”

Your eyes snap wide open and you come face to face with a very much alive Baëkhyun. Sparing a glance to his chest, you see him devoid of any wounds.

One moment you’re lying down and in the blink of an eye, you find yourself standing an arm’s length from Baëkhyun.

Grim realization dawns on you and you gulp down the disbelief, anger, disappointment. Everything.

The smile on the clone’s face worsens the already frantic beating of your heart and the foreboding sensation inside you makes you slowly move your head to the side.

You feel it before you see it: your surroundings turning from mid-afternoon to a dark waste of nothing. Almost as if a sheet is being lifted to reveal nothing but darkness and ruins, the sky boasting nothing but bolts of blood-tainted light.

“How beautiful it is, no? To be able to control light…”

Shaky exhales leave your mouth and it gets harder and harder for you to get some air into your lungs as the inevitable tears pool in your eyes.

“…to be able to manipulate what meets the eye…”

Baëkhyun approaches you and you don’t even fight, feeling yourself frozen on the spot and unable to move. He turns you around slowly, tauntingly, and you lay eyes on a worse situation you didn’t know was possible.

There on the ground lay eight men in various states of bloodied and beaten, eight people you’ve come to love as brothers, eight people who comforted you when you lost your love. There lay your brothers all still alive but barely holding on to the fraying threads of their existence, and standing behind them are their clones who bear the same faces but not a shred of the same heart.

The unmistakable feeling of dread and helplessness, of desperation, washes over you and this time, you fail to stop it from consuming you.

“Did you really think you could win?” Baëkhyun whispers in your ear. “I thought I told you already…” he murmurs as he snakes a hand around your neck.

“…I would do anything to make you mine.”

#exo #exowritersnet #exosnet #baekhyun #byun baekhyun #exo angst #baekhyun angst #byun bakehyun angst #exo x reader #exo x reader angst #baekhyun x reader #baekhyun x reader angst #byun baekhyun x reader #byun baekhyun x reader angst #exo demon!AU #exo x-exo!AU

148 notes · View notes

krreader · 5 years ago

Text

EXO scenario → falling in love after an arranged marriage (mafia!au).

pairing: exo x reader fandom: exo warnings: non idol!au ; mafia!au ; smoking ; mentions of sex ; mentions of oral sex genre: fluff ; smut word count: 1.7k+

a/n: have some dose of exo related content, I hope you enjoy it my loveeee

kim minseok

The fact that this was the only way for you to communicate with the outside world was kind of weird. It didn't feel like you were living in the right century.

But here you were, writing a letter to your mother, because having a phone would be too risky right now, not when so many people wanted you dead.

“It hasn't been easy, but I now know why you and dad did what you did. You know how much I hated the idea of being in an arranged marriage, even if Minseok has never been a choice for a husband. It was just.. not being able to choose for myself, I guess. But I know now that you chose him because you knew I'd be able to live a better life with him. A normal life. Away from all the bad stuff that I had to see.. I know that you never wanted this life for me.. probably dad too. So I know why you sent me away,” you sighed, put down the pen for a moment and smiled when you saw Minseok humming while he was preparing something hot to drink for the two of you, “He's not half as bad as I thought he was. So, even though I never thought I would say this, but.. thank you, mom. Thank you, dad. Thank you for knowing what was best for me, even if I couldn't see it then. Thank you for letting me fall in love and lead a normal life.”

“What are you doing?” Minseok placed the cup in front of you, but you quickly put the letter away, not wanting him to see how you had just poured your heart and soul out.

“Ah, it's nothing.. thank you for this.”

“Are you warm enough? Do you need me to get you some more blankets?”

“No,” you chuckled, “I'm good, thank you.”

All I need is you.. even though you never thought you'd think like that.

kim junmyeon

You couldn't deny it, but yours and Junmyeon's story was like that of a movie.

You met under bad circumstances, hated each other at first, then your parents surprised you with: 'Oh, by the way, you're going to marry each other for the sake of our families' and you hated each other even more after that. Then came the wedding, then came a few weeks with each other in absolute silence, then you started having sex because you were desperate and now.. now you realized that the other one wasn't half as bad as you had always thought they were.

“Don't go,” Junmyeon muttered into the pillow as you wanted to get up, “Stay..”

“I'm just getting something to drink,” you smiled, gently brushing your hand through his hair.

He was too exhausted to stay awake.. but you didn't wake him up again, you just watched him sleep for a couple of minutes and then you, to your own surprise, whispered: “I love you, Kim Junmyeon.”

Words you truly never thought you'd ever say to him.. and even though you couldn't tell him while he was awake for now, telling him like this was a lot more than you ever thought you would say to him.

zhang yixing

“Where is my husband?” you asked one of the staff members who simply pointed to the garden.

And with crossed arms and a raised eyebrow, you watched him smoke, a habit of his that you told him you hated numerous times.

And, yes, he had cut it down severely and he never smoked in front of you anymore, especially not after you got pregnant, but you still didn't like it when he did it in secret.

And the second he saw you, he immediately put it out and looked at you with a nervous chuckle, “Sorry.”

“This isn't good for your health, you know?”

“Funny.. you used to tell me that you hoped I'd die on runs.. and look at you now.. worried about me.”

“You still annoy me a lot,” you licked your lips, then smiled, “But.. I don't want you dead anymore.”

“Ah, are the hormones speaking, dear?” Yixing wrapped his arms around your middle, “Or are you a little bit in love with me, hm?”

“Stop it,” you giggled, even harder when he continued prodding: “Hm? Hm? Hm?”

Of course you were.. and he knew it.

byun baekhyun

“Baekhyun, stop it,” you giggled when he started kissing your neck.

“Why? Don't you like it?” his hand wandered under your shirt, gently beginning to massage your breast.

See, this marriage had started out so differently.. with nothing but hate. Then it turned into lust and now it was slowly developing into more..

A lot more.

You weren't just craving his touch anymore, you were craving.. him. Entirely.

And when you looked directly into his eyes, your breath taken aback, he seemed to understand. And he leaned forward, captured your lips with his and kissed you so passionately that you almost wanted to cry.

This marriage wasn't one that you were happy with at first.. but now.. now it was a whole different story.

kim jongdae

You had waited until your husband was finished with the meeting before you entered his office.

And while he used to completely ignore you in the first few weeks of your marriage, he now looked at you with a soft smile.

“Hello, beautiful.”

“Hello, you.. I just wanted to see how it went?”

“Good.. we secured a good deal, I think. Mine and your father should be pleased.”

“Ah,” you grinned, sitting down on his lap and interlinking your fingers behind his neck, “I hate to say it, but maybe this arranged marriage was good for everyone after all.”

“Weird, isn't it? How we hated each other at first.. and now..”

“Now we slightly like each other more?”

“But just slightly,” you both chuckled, before you leaned down to kiss him deeply, both of you knowing that the truth was a lot more than just ‘liking each other’.

park chanyeol

Just looking at Chanyeol used to make you sick. The moment your parents had announced that he had to be the one you had to get married to was the moment you started hating him. Not because of anything in particular, just.. because.

But over the course of time, you and him realized that you weren't actually that bad with each other.

You were a good team, ended up working together on a lot of things that benefited both of your families.. you stayed up a lot with each other at night and then one night and a few drinks too many ended up with him on top of you.

Now that was a regular thing.

At night, in the morning, throughout the day.

Right now.

“Aren't you still exhausted after last night,” you laughed when you could feel his boner against your ass and his lips against your neck.

“Can I tell you something?” he whispered.

The sun wasn't up yet, so the room was still completely dark. And somehow that's why Chanyeol felt like he could say what he was about to say. It was as if he was less vulnerable right now.

“What?” you turned around, despite not being able to see him.

“I think I'm falling in love with you..”

It took a few seconds for you to process his words.. at first you thought you might have misheard him, but his fingers were running ever so gently over your cheek and you could feel his soft gaze on you.

You didn't say anything back that day, mainly because you were still figuring out your own feelings, but knowing what you knew now made that a lot easier.

do kyungsoo

“Can't sleep?” Kyungsoo joined you on the balcony, draping a blanket over your shoulders.

“The baby is kicking a lot.. I thought if I walked around a bit she would fall asleep, but she's not in the mood for that apparently.”

Your husband laughed and sat down next to you. He didn't say anything for a few minutes, just watched the sky with you, until he blurted out, “I love you.. you know that, don’t you?”

It was the first time he said it, despite you and him being married for a year now.

But it wasn't a happy marriage at first. It was a forced one that turned into one that you were okay with and now one you were even happy with.

But you knew he loved you now.. you had for a while now. Because sometimes actions spoke louder than words.

You smiled, though, interlinked your fingers with his, “I know. And I love you too, Do Kyungsoo.”

He smiled too.

kim jongin

Jongin was always very cold towards you, had been since the very first moment you met him.

You had really tried to make this marriage a little less shitty, because you wanted to make your family proud and you wanted your families to run the country.. or at least the underworld, together.

But it wasn't easy for you.

Because while you really liked him.. he never seemed to care about you. Emotionally, at least. You had plenty of sex, but you wanted more..

“Uhm.. boss?” one of Jongin's minions entered his office, “There.. is something I should tell you.. about.. your wife.”

He didn't even look up, only when the guy didn't continue did he become impatient, “And? What is it?”

“She uh.. she wasn't feeling so good this morning, so the doctor came by and.. well, she's pregnant.”

And when Jongin entered your bedroom about twenty minutes later, you saw him smile at you for the first time since you met him.

Because he was happy.. he was happy about that baby and he was happy that he maybe now was able to form a connection between you two.

Maybe he could even love you like you already seemed to love him.

oh sehun

God, if you had known how good Sehun was with his mouth, you never would have waited this long to have sex with him. But you used to hate him.. too much to ever even really look at him, when you first got married.

You were still panting heavily when he kissed his way back up to you, grinning, then biting your lower lip.

“Are you okay there? Need a break?”

“No.. I just need you,” you said.

Maybe a little.. too honestly.

Because it wasn't just that you meant it for sex, you meant it literally. You needed him. You.. started to like him.. a lot. More than you ever thought you would.

And so Sehun just smiled, a lot softer now, before he hovered above your lips and whispered, “You have me.. forever.”

#exo scenario #exo reaction #exo imagine #exo x reader #exo reactions #kpop imagine #kpop reaction #exo #kpop #reader #request

234 notes · View notes

werejusttouchingeachother · 5 years ago

Text

SEOUL 2018 [August 10th, 4:27PM]

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 T/W: angst - mentions of abuse, depression, suicide, cursing Words: 4171

It was almost two months later when you finally met Baekhyun again after the night he left New York. He’d been at the dorms and you’d felt more terrified than you had been when you first launched your boutique.

Manager had ushered you inside quickly, immediately making you feel awkward as your eyes met Junmyeon and Sehun who were sitting on the couch and watching something on the television.

“Y/N,” Junmyeon called your name in surprise as he quickly stood up, wide eyes exchanging glances with Manager behind you. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

“I don’t think anyone did, Hyung,” Sehun mutters, giving you a small smile. “Hi, Noona. It’s been a long time. I missed you.”

You smile fondly at that, tense shoulders loosening at his contagious warmth. “I missed you too, Sehun.”

“I’m mad at you, though.” He crossed his arms. “You never called. Or responded to my texts.”

You flinched, expecting this accusation from the youngest member who’d always had the most fun teasing you and who you knew would take your silent treatment the hardest—not when you’d spent days and nights sending each other funny memes and pictures of dogs with bad haircuts almost on a daily basis only to suddenly ghost him.

“Yeah, I just…” you trail off and shake your head, knowing excuses were in vain. “I’m sorry. I should have replied.”

Sehun blinks at your sincere apology, not having expected it and his face clouds over with worry at your seriousness.

“Sehun,” Jun says, nudging him. “You can catch up with her later.” He gives you a meaningful look as he asks, “Y/N, aren’t you here to—?”

“Yeah, I’ll go check,” Manager says, turning to your left in the direction of the rooms. You grab his arm to stop him.

“Does he…?” You trail off and Manager hesitates before nodding.

“I told him that you landed here today morning.” He pauses before saying, “I think he’s expecting you.”

You waited in the hallway then as all the members slowly filed out of their rooms, giving you polite formal smiles (Jongin, Yixing and Jongdae), wary looks (Minseok and Kyungsoo) or blatantly ignored your presence (Chanyeol).

You didn’t say anything. If any of them knew what had exactly happened, you were sure that it had to be Chanyeol.

All of them joined Junmyeon and Sehun in the hall, the farthest room from Baekhyun’s to give you as much privacy as they could within a dormitory. Bowing your head in thanks, you walk past Manager and head for the right door at the end of the hallway.

Taking a deep breath, you raise your hand and knock gently on the door. You can hear the silence of the usually noisy dorm and it doesn’t help the way your heart is pounding against your rib-cage, your stomach twisting with anxiety.

The door opens then and your breath catches as your eyes fall on Baekhyun.

His hair is dishevelled and his clothes are drabby, hanging off him in a way that you knew all too-well that he had been wearing them for a while. His cheeks are hollow and your eyes run over his clothes, growing frustrated when you realise they’re too large to figure out whether he’d lost weight.

“You haven’t been eating,” Baekhyun says, his tone flat and your eyes fly back up to his face in surprise. You feel your skin rise with goosebumps at hearing his voice after so long and your eyes sting with unshed tears that you have to forcibly blink back.

“I…” You clear your throat before raising an eyebrow at him. “Neither have you. Your face has grown thinner.”

“What is this, a competition?” He rolls his eyes, stepping away to let you in.

“If it is, nobody is winning!” You hear Sehun shout from the hall, making you roll your eyes.

“Sehun, shut up!” Baekhyun yells as he closes the door behind him. You bite your lip as you look around the familiar room that was almost a home to you at one point—a point that seemed entirely too long ago now.

“Did you wear lipstick? Or did you chew it all off?” Baekhyun asks, pointing out your usual nervous habit and your gaze shifts back to him as he sits in his gaming chair, opposite the bed that looked unusually tidy.

He hasn’t been sleeping.

“Did you sleep at all this past week?” You shoot back, crossing your arms as you sit down on the bed and cock your head at the neatly made sheets. “Or leave that seat? How long have you been gaming in those clothes?”

“Why do you care?” Baekhyun snaps and you sigh, leaning back as you square your shoulders and remind yourself not to follow his childish antics.

“I didn’t come here to fight, Baek,” you start, trying to gather your thoughts. “I—”

“Y/N.” His voice is sharp enough that you stop, eyebrows rising as he inhales deeply before saying, “If you’re here to break up, just leave. I haven’t processed a lot since New York but I’m not numb enough that I can sit here and listen to you end everything. Being here in Korea must be killing you anyway so just leave and I’ll consider it the end. Let’s not make this any harder than it—”

“Shut the fuck up, Baekhyun,” you snap, eyes narrowed in disbelief as you gape at him. “Is that what you want to do? New York to be our last conversation? Just leave a two-years-long relationship like this?” You shake your head, holding up your hand to stop whatever he was going to say as you interrupted, “I’ll leave soon, don’t worry. As soon as I’m done telling you what I have to tell you.”

He falls silent, eyes watching you carefully and you take a breath before starting. “I told you something that night two months ago. Before you said that I shouldn’t be feeling that way. Something about my childhood. Do you remember?”

Baekhyun nods slowly. “You said that you’ve never been enough for your parents from when you were young. And I made you feel like that again, yeah, that’s burned into my memory, don’t worry.”

You shake your head, shooting him a look. “That first part, yes. The second part, no. This is what I flew out here to tell you, face-to-face. What I should have told you that night.”

Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you take a second to muster the courage to say what you’re going to say. Baekhyun immediately notices your hesitation, his eyes clouding with worry at the obvious storm raging inside your mind right now.

It almost makes you smile—the fact that he could still read you like an open book. Despite all the pain, all the misunderstanding, all the conflicting emotions that were stirred up amongst both of you, he still worried about you, your thoughts, your nervous habits and your weight.

“My parents came from well-reputed families,” you started, leaning back against the wall. “It was an arranged marriage, a union that was more of a business deal than that of love. They weren’t chaebols or anything but they were well-off and had a long uninterrupted line of sons on my father’s side that always took over the business and carried it forward.”

Baekhyun’s face falls at this, already knowing where this was headed as you continued, “They wanted a boy. When I was born, it was more of a shock than anything. They tried a lot for a second child but my mother had some health issues and there were complications. So they were stuck with me and I was… never enough. I did everything they wanted me to do, always obeying their insane rules and never had any fun the way other kids did. I used to draw a lot from when I was a kid and they would rip my drawings apart, throw my colours away. I’d get into trouble if I didn’t do the homework or scored anything less than hundred on tests. I used to cry at school and my teacher told me that they do it because they love me, because they care. That most parents are strict so the kids will grow to be really smart.”

“So I studied hard. Began to buy separate notebooks to draw in and hide them where they wouldn’t find them. I lived by the rules they made, all through middle school and high school—it was always hell, I was always wishing to get away. I never even dared to like someone as a teenager because I feared what would happen at home if they found out. I didn’t have any friends because they discouraged it, said it was a distraction. They’d decided on the day of my birth that since I couldn’t take over the business, I’d follow the highest position for a woman—medicine. Their words, not mine. So then, I joined medical school and when I had to draw more bodies and organs than the clothes that went on it, I snapped. I had a phase where I stopped attending classes, where I failed all the exams and almost got suspended. It was a highly prestigious school so they called in my parents and they paid heftily to keep me at school, promising that I’d make up for it.”

You pause then, lowering your head and taking a breath since the next thing was particularly difficult to voice out loud.

“That was the second time my father hit me,” you say in a hoarse voice, clearing your throat before continuing, “The first time was in elementary when they found my doodles for the first time on my books. The teacher had sent a note to them, suggesting to join an art class because I drew more than I wrote notes and they beat me till I was black and blue. They told me that art was for idiots, that things like drawing, writing, acting and singing would never get me anywhere in life. After that was when I started my preparation for medical school. After I failed that too, I thought they would understand then or at least try. But they beat me again. And I thought I’d kill myself so, I ran away from home.”

You glance at him, smiling slightly. “That time we were at Tokyo, you were so surprised when I didn’t want to take pictures together under the cherry blossom trees. It’s not because I was cold that night—it’s because cherry blossoms always reminds me of that night I ran out in Korea. They were all I could see when I looked up and they were so pretty that it felt like they were mocking me. That was the first time I wished I could look up at the sky and see the Eiffel Tower, wish that I could be at Paris where I could draw freely and just live for myself.”

“And that’s when I realised that I was going to kill myself when I hadn’t ever lived. Not once, not even for a day, had I lived for myself. It was always for my parents and they never even appreciated my efforts or tried to understand me.”

You look up then, smiling although you couldn’t see him because your eyes were tearing up. “The only time that I lived was when I designed. I had nothing to lose. There was no one to please so I thought I’d fully meet the criteria of such a worthless disappointing child. I started dreaming about Paris and my boutique—I started dreaming of skies where I could look up and see the Eiffel.”

Baekhyun’s expression is unreadable but you continue, “You know the rest from here. I lied about going for classes and instead worked many part-time jobs. I saved up just enough money for one of the cheapest flights to Paris but it wasn’t enough, of course not. I got kicked out of school and I didn’t wait to get kicked out of home too—I used all the money I’d saved to move out instead and started working at Korea. Three years later, about the time all my friends were graduating from college, I finally had enough to go to Paris. For seven months, I struggled and starved and almost died because of how poor I was before my designs finally caught the eye of someone who saw my potential. I became his apprentice.”

You take a deep breath and grabbed the pillow from his bed, hugging it in your lap because your hands were shaking.

“I have a lot of issues with my parents, Baekhyun,” you state aloud, looking at him. “My childhood was traumatic for me and there’s a lot that I’ve been suppressing from when I was a kid. I’m insecure when people show me affection because I’m not used to receiving it, I have anxieties about whether they will leave so I think I should leave first because I always tend to think I don’t deserve whatever love I get. Seoyeon is a clear example of that as my only friend—the only one I’ve trusted enough to get close to me.”

“I moved out of the apartment after you left.” His eyebrows rise at this and you explain, “It felt lonelier when you were gone. It was too big and memories kept haunting me, I was always going crazy with my own thoughts so I decided to move into a smaller place.”

You paused then, inhaling softly as you felt your shoulders lighten like you’d just lifted a burden, one that had been weighing down on you for almost all your life. Feeling your heart race slightly because of the next thing you were going to say, you mentally prepared yourself for all the negative possibilities before continuing.

“I’m going for therapy,” you declare, watching his eyes widen in surprise at this. “Seoyeon told me that if I never deal with my past, it’s always going to affect any relationship that I have. I started almost as soon as you left and all these things I told you, Baekhyun, they’re-they’re just the surface of it. You know that I hate coming back to Korea even though you didn’t know exactly why. Same with the cherry blossom trees. There’s a lot more that I can’t tell you, a lot that I can only tell my therapist because it’s difficult for me to admit it openly, even to myself. But at the same time, these are the things I should have talked to you about, like you told me that night at New York. I let my insecurities get to my head and projected it onto you which was unfair.”

You place the pillow back and stand up then, looking down at him.

“I understand and accept everything you said that night,” you state, Baekhyun gazing up at you unblinkingly. "We don’t have to go public. We never do. I don’t care about that and I don’t think I ever did. The party that night, the way everyone was so welcoming… it made me question if I was even worth standing around such people. If I was worthy of your love and care.”

“And that is not your fault, Baekhyun,” you clearly enunciate, knowing he was going to interrupt with the opposite statement. “Those are just my fears stemming from my shitty childhood. Apparently my first instinct when shown love is to fight and then flee. But I know now that it’s not a matter of worth—you’ve only loved and cared for me, unconditionally, even when I’ve been closed off and so difficult.”

“I…” You trail off, heavy emotion weighing down on your chest suddenly and making you choke on your words as you hoarsely say, “I’ve only known darkness, Baekhyun, so when you shone down on me with all your light, I got blinded. I was an idiot and I fucked up something that was beautiful and the best thing that ever happened to me. But I can see clearer now for the first time in my life and I know better. And I know that I love you. So much that I am even willing to be mysterious Mrs. Byun X forever. No one has to know about us or me and I couldn’t care less.”

You take a breath then, meeting his gaze. “I’m opening the door again, Baek. And I’m giving you the same option I did last time except now, I can promise you that I do not care about being hidden and I also promise to try and fight my demons from wrecking what we have. If we have it again.”

Baekhyun blinks at you, pouty lips parted open as he gapes at you like a fish and you nod, stepping to the door slowly.

“You don’t have to answer right now,” you reassure him, forcing yourself to smile even though you were beyond terrified. “I know it’s a lot to take at once. Manager has the address of my hotel and I’m staying for a week. Or you can just text me, if you don’t want to see me. He has my number too.”

Baekhyun doesn’t say a word and you feel your heart crack slightly in your chest as you nod, biting down on your lip and turn to the door.

Swallowing heavily, you mutter, “Goodbye, Bae—”

You’re spun around by a death grip on your arm then, eyes widening as you look up at Baekhyun standing right in front of you.

“No,” he said, shaking his head as he dragged you back to the bed. He placed his hands on your shoulders and pushed you down forcibly, ordering, “Sit.”

“How can you leave like that?” Baekhyun asked, disbelief colouring his tone. “I didn’t even speak yet.”

You blink at his glare, stammering, “I mean-I just-I didn’t want you to feel pressured—”

“Y/N, it’s been two fucking months,” he snorts, shooting you a look. He retrieves his hands from your shoulders and lowers himself to the floor at your feet.

“You know that you can just sit beside me?” You ask, glaring down at him as a sudden memory flashes vividly in your mind. “Or back on that seat across from me?”

He shrugs as he sits cross-legged, looking up at you. The room’s light was right behind you and it shone down right on his face that made it look like he had stars in his eyes and you wondered if it was bright enough to hurt him.

“I want to look at you,” he says quietly.

“You’re sitting the same way you did that night,” you remind him softly, biting down on your lip.

His eyebrows furrow in confusion before he realises, eyes softening as he takes your hand from your lap slowly.

“I’m not leaving this time,” Baekhyun assured you gently, giving you a small smile as he played with your fingers. He raises his other hand to your face and tugged your lower lip loose from your teeth, shaking his head at you and giving you a warning look, the way he always used to whenever you kept gnawing at your lips.

He sits back and gives you a cheeky smile then. “Technically, I can’t. You came here to the dorms so I don’t really have anywhere to go from here—”

“I missed you,” you blurted, unable to stop yourself. His smile freezes at your words and you blink back the tears gathering furiously as you corrected in a softer tone, “I miss you.”

“Me too,” he murmurs, intertwining your fingers together. He grips your hand tightly and seems to struggle as he forces the next words out, “I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you. Therapy and dealing with everything from your past can’t have been easy. I should have been there, I shouldn’t have left—”

“Baek, no,” you grab his hand holding yours with your other hand, shaking your head vehemently at him. “It’s good that you did. I needed to get my shit together—about me, about us. I needed to do it, it was time.”

He looks into your eyes, voice meek as he asks, “Are you okay?”

You start to nod and he tightens his grip on your hand again as he repeats, “No, Y/N. Really… are you okay?”

You pause, swallowing slightly as you look down at both your hands. “It’s… a lot. There’s a lot that I’m remembering and reliving that I don’t want to. But that’s how I can make peace with it, how I can stop—” You take a shaky breath, choking as you finish, “—stop hurting myself. And stop myself from hurting you.”

“Oh, god, Y/N.” Baekhyun lets go of your hands then, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. You still at the sudden unexpected embrace and he pulls you down from the bed onto his lap, hugging you tightly to him.

Your entire body seems frozen as you find yourself on the floor with him, his arms clutching you tightly to him.

“Baek,” you whisper, practically trembling in his arms when you feel his warmth singe into your skin. He is as warm as you remember him and when his scent, your instant comforter, flooded your nose after missing it for what felt like forever—you’re almost ready to cry.

He pulls away to look at you, shaking his head as he whispers, “Please don’t cry, baby, it kills me.”

His hands cup your face and you close your eyes, leaning into his touch as you sigh softly. You open your eyes and almost melt when you see the way he’s staring at you.

It reminded you of Paris—the way he looked at you every night when he said ‘goodbye’ at the door of your hotel room, a gaze that lingered and that you were reluctant to break away from.

Despite saying it already, you repeat, “I miss—”

Baekhyun closes the gap between your mouths, his plush lips pressing against yours tenderly as he held your face in his hands. You closed your eyes, responding instantly while your hands fist into the front of his shirt, clutching him tightly as if you were afraid he’d slip away.

He kisses you back just as fervently, holding you gently as if he didn’t want to break you. The kiss tastes as sweet as the first, your heart thudding against your chest and butterflies erupting in your stomach as if it was your first time.

You pull away to breathe with your eyes still closed and he presses his forehead against yours, feeling your breaths intermingle. Your eyelids flutter open and his thumb wipes a stray tear that had streaked down your cheek.

“I missed you too,” he breathes, pressing another kiss to your mouth. He lingers before pulling away, lowering his hands from your face as his eyes meet yours with determination before muttering, “Fuck it.”

You blink. “What?”

“Fuck it. I love you. We’ll make it through this, through everything—my job, your past, everything. We walked into this thinking our biggest problem would be the distance and we’ve overcome that. It’s… it’s fine. I can’t lose you again, Y/N. These two months have been hell, I’ve just been going crazy in here.” Baekhyun takes in a shaky breath, grabbing your hands from his chest and staring at your joined fingers. “Hyungnim told me that you needed some space and I thought it was over so I broke down but then he told me to wait, that you just needed some time. I thought you’d made your decision and the reason you weren’t reaching out was because you didn’t want to… be with me anymore.”

You shake your head and lean forward, kissing him. “That’s not… you know I can’t leave you, Baekhyun.”

“Then don’t.”

You smile, nodding slightly. “I won’t.” You hesitate, biting your lower lip as you ask timidly, “Does this mean that you’re walking in through the open door again?”

He smiles then, cheeks puffing and eyes shining as he replies, “Well, you know what they say. Love is an open door.”

“Literally betrayed her and left her to die but okay, Hans,” you tease and he rolls his eyes.

“Fine.” He grins, releasing your hands and wrapping his arms around your middle, pulling you into his chest. “Then… oh, right. Paris. Love is your open arms.”

You roll your eyes teasingly, snorting, “Always so cheesy.”

“Shut up, you love it.” Baekhyun drops a kiss on the top of your head and you close your eyes, smiling at how much you’d missed the gesture—genuinely smiling with your heart feeling full for the first time in months. Your veins that had gone numb after so much time apart finally felt alive, filling with the ethereal golden rays as he basked you in his contagious warmth.

Your sunshine.

36 notes · View notes

bold-lettered-blog · 5 years ago

Text

#17

things i imagined

kyungsoo/sehun, pg-13, 8000+ words

sehun is really proud of having more than two lines (and kyungsoo is too)

(sorting through my old computer, i found this gem i started way back in 2015, after the promotions of ‘love me right’. i don’t write fics anymore, which is kind of sad and somehow inevitable given the very different life i’m living right now, but it was so heartwarming to reminisce about all the beautiful times i spent loving sesoo and writing and this fandom... i thought i’d share it with you. so here it goes, in all it’s raw, unfinished, un-proof read glory, a draft from something that could have been a whole novel. at the end, there’s a long note i wrote to myself how the story would turn out)

The manager hyungs tell him the exact same thing that Baekhyun's been saying all along. "I feel it, I feel it sooo deep in my heart that you're going to slay the next comeback. You're going to have more than two lines, you'll see," is what Baekhyun said, but it left Sehun feeling nothing else but a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. He is perfectly aware of his incapabilities of singing, and he has so much to improve both dancing and rapping wise, he knows that, yet the cold fact that he has pretty much nothing to work with makes him grim and gloomy.

That is why, on a sunny Thursday morning, when all the members are gathered in one of the practice rooms with Jongin dancing to himself in one of the corners, he lacks the feeling of any kind of excitement. The lyrics are about to be handed to them - some of the parts he's heard, mostly Yixing's, when he was singing in the shower, but he has no idea what's about to come right to him. Maybe Baekhyun's right, and he's going to have more than 6 seconds to prove his talent, but that seems too beautiful to be true. God, Sehun, get yourself together, he thinks. Jongdae pokes him in the waist then, staring into his soul like he's looking at his only child. Oh, Sehun often forgets that his face is like a mirror to anything that's going on in his head.

"Why so down?" Jongdae says to him, his frizzly poodle hair crowning his head almost perfectly. Sehun sometimes feels jealous, because Jongdae is one of the very best vocalists in SM, even if he's not as smooth as Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo. Well, if Sehun could be anyone for a day he sure would be Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo the brave, the manly, the one with the silky voice. He would sing like an angel and more. He would be smiley, and nice, and very delicate and soft. Because – and Kyungsoo would hit him if he heard that – this is what Kyungsoo is. And Sehun wants that, even if just a little bit, to feel that kind of power in his voice, to feel small and cute and down to earth at the same time.

Sometimes Sehun forgets Kyungsoo is human. He is, after all, but Sehun likes to think that Kyungsoo is an alien, because only an alien could be so inhumanly impeccable all the time.

Chanyeol would oppose to that, surely, but Chanyeol is not someone Kyungsoo would want near 24/7. Who Kyungsoo wants near is Jongin, and Minseok, and Joonmyeon. He wants near Jongdae and Yixing and sometimes Baekhyun and very rarely Chanyeol. But he does not want Sehun, and the thought cuts down right to his core where it hurts the most to leave him bleeding out all cold and lonely.

I'm horrible, Sehun thinks, to view hyung's distance that way when obviously he has reasons, but Sehun can't help himself. Can't help himself now when Tao is gone to LA and Lu Han is in China. The distance is too much, yet feels nowhere as far as Kyungsoo is to him.

"And Sehun," the manager says, and Sehun snaps out of his reverie. He takes his paper and bows. From the corner of his eyes he sees Kyungsoo smiling, bright, but it's not aimed at Sehun. Never at him.

Baekhyun was right - as much as Sehun didn't believe it, he got a whole of two more lines to work with, and Chanyeol comes up congratulating him grinning, patting the small of his back.

"You've worked hard for this," Baekhyun says, and Sehun feels grateful, and strong, and invincible. Almost like Kyungsoo.

Jongin laughs at him, then, saying he needs to improve his english even more, but Sehun pays no attention to him. All he cares about is the plus two lines he got and this brilliant opportunity to show himself and everyone else how great he actually is.

After practice and reading through the lines to the new song and mini album, 'Love Me Right', Sehun stays back at the washroom. He dismisses Junmyeon with a slight wave of the hand when Junmyeon tries to coerce him back to the dorms.

"I'm good hyung, don't worry," Sehun says to him when Junmyeon looks too adamant about staying in with him. "Just need a bit of fresh air."

"Alright," Junmyeon says hesitantly and slowly turns to leave. His face is all soft lines and little curves. He is beautiful and sings just right, and-- god, there it goes again, the awful feeling of not being enough screwing a hole right to the middle of Sehun's heart.

There are times that you feel not quite comfortable in your body, Sehun knows, and he's been through those days, months, even years, but still, the defeating sense of being worthless stings five times more than anything. Being worthless means being unwanted, and even though Sehun is familiar with the feeling, he hasn't been exposed to that kind of emotion in a long time.

It hurts. There is no physical pain, but it hurts just as much as having your throat cut right open. It itches. Lingers. Then you bleed out.

I'm pathetic – is what he thinks next. The water from the faucet has been running for a good ten minutes now. He sinks his hands under it, watches the drops falling apart somewhere between his knuckles. It's akin to the way he feels his own heart breaking right now.

He hears the door clicking open, and someone steps in. Sehun almost spins around to say something not so very nice, but when he registers Kyungsoo standing by the entrance, his back plastered to the closed door, he looses all his words.

Looking at Kyungsoo now is almost as bad as having his heart laying around in tiny little pieces. Kyungsoo the brave, the great, the smooth voiced, the awesome. He really is awesome, and also so far away. It makes Sehun feel a hundred times worse.

He splashes his face with cold water, his fingertips going numb pretty fast. Oh, how he wishes his feelings could go numb just as simple as that. He turns off the faucet, stares at himself in the mirror. Kyungsoo is still there, with his back to the door. He hasn't moved an inch. It makes Sehun feel bad for him, because Sehun hasn't been particularly nice. He turns to say something, something cheerful, something that would make him feel empty inside, like, "I'm alright. I was just feeling hot," or, "I'm feeling okay." All of them would be a lie.

"I'm proud of you, Sehun-ah."

Kyungsoo says that. Just when Sehun thinks about a truth to tell that would not be as judging or hurting, Kyungsoo simply says that. Smoothly. Sincerely. Like he has his whole heart behind it.

"There is no need to pity me, hyung," Sehun says, and it's true, although it doesn't entirely feels right on the tounge. Sehun isn't the type to make a big fuss, he's just loud and sometimes overhyped and childish, but he's never the one to start a fight. The simple thought of having a quarrel with someone makes him nauseous throughout his body.

"Why would I pity you," Kyungsoo takes a step forward. There is only about a meter between them but it feels like a whole ocean. "When you are so talented? I only pity your limited opportunities."

Sehun goes quiet after that, just stares at the little bow above Kyungsoo's lips. He has a pretty mouth, and a pretty voice, with a pretty face. A pretty, petite body. Nice muscles. Sehun has none of that, and something self-destructive tries to tentatively climb its way up his throat. Sehun tones it down with a shallow smile, but the way Kyungsoo leans towards him indicates that Sehun doesn't have to hide anything from him.

He doesn't realise how long they stand there, wordlessly, Kyungsoo boring holes into his soul with his eyes. Sehun would feel self-conscious if it wasn't for the fact that he's practically empty inside.

"Um, alright," Sehun speaks up after what feels like an eternity. He starts for the door, to where Kyungsoo is standing. His back isn't pushed against the frame anymore, but Sehun still senses his presence there when he goes to click the door open. "Let's go back to the dorm."

Kyungsoo just stands there, staring at him. Sehun stills his hand on the doorknob. Kyungsoo looks majestic, even while shifting his weight from one leg to another. The eeriness of Kyungsoo's being makes him kind of calm, but doesn't fill in the empty cracks in his soul.

Sehun then suddenly realises; this is the way Kyungsoo gives comfort. Sehun knows Kyungsoo isn't really good with words, because he has his feelings too complicated to say out loud. Kyungsoo shows affection with body language and slight brushes on the arm, the fingers, the knees. Kyungsoo is good at praising but never comforting. Kyungsoo is not an alien. Kyungsoo is a boy with dark eyebrows and a rich dip above his lips that Sehun will never have.

Kyungsoo reaches out to him. The moment his hand spills out wide on Sehun's back is the moment when the empty space inside him slowly starts to fuel up with untamed longing, the kind that you cannot foresee or outrun. It's just a feeling there, at the back of your heart, pulsing all vibrant and bright until it dies out in your throat.

Sehun reminds himself it's Kyungsoo. His bandmate. Ex-roommate. Brother. Friend. Someone Sehun could never...

He doesn't finish the thought. He doesn't dare to. Instead, he shies away from the touch.

Kyungsoo isn't taken aback. Kyungsoo doesn't usually have his reactions excessive - he is always collected, meanwhile Sehun is falling apart.

"Okay," Kyungsoo says, waits until Sehun opens the door and emerges. As Sehun watches him walking afore, the longing kicks back with full force.

When did he become so infatuated? Kyungsoo has been there with him pretty much from the very beginning, the trainee days when Sehun was almost the same height as him, when they were still little kids with only dreams in their pockets. Kyungsoo knows every aspect of him, but Sehun doesn't know half of Kyungsoo's heart. How did Kyungsoo make him so defenseless?

Maybe he was whipped from the start. Maybe it was when Kyungsoo walked in with his arms fasted close to his side, glasses high up on his nose. Maybe it was years later, around debut, when Kyungsoo first let Sehun really into the hall of his heart, but never opened more rooms for him. Or maybe, just maybe – it was the way Kyungsoo's hands stilled over his back mere fifteen minutes ago.

---

Sleep doesn't come easy that evening. He still remembers the warmth of Kyungsoo's palm on his back, the longing that the touch awoke - the fact that this simple genuine act of kindness affects him so much keeps him twisting and turning throughout the night.

Junmyeon is fast asleep on the other side of the room. There is not much light, only a faint blue ray of moon shines in through the cracks of the blinds and paints Junmyeon's hair grey on end. Sehun takes the image in, thinks, if Junmyeon were to stay with him in the washroom, would have he felt the same longing that washed over him without warning? Would Junmyeon's touch on his back make him feel not as empty as much?

Maybe it's just about his attachment to his hyungs – after all, they've been through so much, ups and downs, awards, tears, angriness – that he feels this connected. They are close. All of them.

So why does a touch of Kyungsoo make him this needy? Years ago, this touch would have meant nothing – or, at least, nothing that it means now. It would mean "I'm here for you", or, "There's no need to be sad". It wouldn't mean "I want you so much".

He shivers at that thought. He doesn't really want Kyungsoo, does he? Yes, Kyungsoo is small, and kind, and soft, but Kyungsoo is Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo is his bandmate. Ex-roommate. Brother. Friend. Someone Sehun could never...

There's this thought again, scratching the back of his mind all tireless. It leaves Sehun unarmed and a sudden tiredness washes over him, the weight of the world pressing his eyelids closed. These confusing feelings are draining him of energy and if he doesn't sleep now, yesterday's dance practice will hurt like hell.

He wills himself to sleep at half past three, staring at Junmyeon's hair painted all various greys.

---

Promotions for Love Me Right are cut short - it's mostly because of individual schedules and the remaining stops of their Asian concert tour. Sehun doesn't really have anything to do - one photoshoot here, an other there, but mainly, there's nothing in his line up.

"They ain't no giving you schedules because they don't want to," Jongdae says to him one particular night out with the beagle-line. "It's because the company has a lot of controversies going on."

Sehun rolls his eyes at that. He wishes Jongdae could stop defending this shitty regime SM built up. He doesn't tell him how SM cut short Super Junior's promotions as well, doesn't argue him about f(x) being neglected, or SHINee unpaid, even though he would like to oppose.

Jongdae is not the right person to have a quarrell with. He is bold and loud, words sprouting out his mouth like fire yet inside he's mellow and delicate. It's all contradictions; Jongdae sees only good, but his words are sharp, even if his heart is made out of butterflies and fine china.

"Um, let's not talk about this," Baekhyun says, but Sehun has enough of not communicating about their problems. This is the exact thing that happened when Kris, then Lu Han and Tao left, it's the same thing that is happening now. Sehun has enough of not talking. He wants to, but doesn't quite know how when all his members want to talk about is patbingsu, and the thought eats him away. He's long lost his appetite, but Chanyeol is still shoving fat dumplings down his throat.

By the time the patbingsu arrives, Sehun collects his courage enough to say, "I think we need to speak more often. About... Our... Problems."

He feels three pairs of eyes boring holes right into him, but doesn't dare to look up. He knows what they'll look like anyways; having their mouth open, paralysed, a dumb expression gracing all of their faces. Sehun knows talking isn't one of his characteristics per se, but there are things that need to be said. Even if it hurts.

He wonders if Kyungsoo felt exactly like this, the other day back in the washroom when he had his narrow little back pushed against the door. He wonders if Kyungsoo struggled to say those words out, just like Sehun was struggling right now, if he had the same whirlwind of thoughts creeping to the back of his head. He wonders if it's anything more than it already is; if it was something Kyungsoo had on his mind all day long, and the thought spreads a warm tingling sensation throughout his chest.

"Well... Let's talk then," Jongdae says. He has ice cream running down his chin, and for a split moment Sehun wants to reach out and wipe it away, wants to see if touching Jongdae feels the same as swiping a hand down Kyungsoo's arm.

"Yeah, let's talk," says Chanyeol, nodding, "It's true we haven't really had a conversation about... things."

Sehun tries to speak, tries to say something relevant, something meaningful, but every jumbled word of his gets stuck halfway between two mouthfuls of shaved ice. This is an opportunity to open up, as if he wasn't open enough, and now, goddamn, there's no sound coming out of his mouth. He thinks, why am I being like this, when he was the one to start up this conversation and they could talk for real this time, and, god, there is nothing he can say.

Baekhyun notices he's struggling. Baekhyun, on regular, notices a lot of things; he's observing, everything and everyone to the point where he realises individual gestures of feelings. He especially notices Sehun, lately, and it makes Sehun feel safe, like he has someone to lean on when the day is hard and heavy, the two of them sitting quietly at the back of the van, not really talking but still, Baekhyun's caresses are speaking to him. A light stroke on the hand means, "you are not alone," and two fingers circulating Sehun's wrist says, "you can tell me anything". Baekhyun can communicate well with both words and body, and that is something Sehun lacks. Too. Sehun lacks a lot of things. A strange feeling floods him all blue to his toes and he shoves the patbingsu away.

"Sehun-ah, we know it's been hard on you," Baekhyun says then, not looking at Sehun but watching his abandoned patbingsu instead. "The other members leaving does not mean we will leave you too."

Damn, Baekhyun observed Sehun too much. The cold truth of his feelings being said out loud by somebody else feels like a rock hard punch to the stomach. His hands are shaking, so he hides them under the table, never really looking Baekhyun in the eye.

"Is that why you're so down lately, Sehun-ah? I noticed you shying away the other day after practice. We're here for you, you know?" Jongdae says. His voice is smooth and rich like honey. It's another punch right to Sehun's core.

"Yes," Sehun says. He could tell them about Kyungsoo, and Kyungsoo's hand, and his narrow petite back, but chooses not to. They do not need to know that.

"Don't be sad, Sehun-ah. Smile instead," is all Chanyeol says. It's unlikely of him, to talk this little, but Sehun knows the three ex-members leaving has made all of them sad in different ways.

"I'm not sad anymore," says Sehun, and for the first time that night, he smiles. It's a real smile, and it comes forceless and easy, even though the feeling of blue still stings at his sides.

The car ride back is happy, Baekhyun and Jongdae singing along to crappy songs on the radio and Chanyeol beatboxing for them, but inside the dorm, locked in his room, Sehun cannot find his peace.

Sehun catches himself wondering too much lately – wondering about his worth, abilities, opportunities, chances he had missed, chances he had taken. Thinks about the times when training for being a part of an SM boyband was enough for him, when feeling like he belongs was his only desire. Remembers the the long afternoons spent in various practice rooms with boys just like him, scrawny kids who haven’t grown into their own skin yet, didn’t even know how to. All they knew was what they wanted – being stars, dancers, singers, maybe a bit of all three. But did they know what they needed?

Junmyeon groans in his sleep across the room. Sehun looks in his general direction, but doesn’t see much – just stares into black nothingness, but imagines Junmyeon fast asleep with his knees drawn close to his chest, his hair crowning his head like a halo on his five hundred thousand won pillow. Wonders if sleep came to Junmyeon easy this night, if he dreams in colour, about things he wants to do, about things he loves.

Wonders if Kyungsoo wonders as much as he does on sleepless nights when his bones and muscles are dense from too much dancing, stomach too full from after-practice dinner. Wonders, what if Kyungsoo is only nice to him out of pity, even though he said he doesn’t pity him; what if Kyungsoo is not particularly kind just to him, if he’s nice to anyone else, anyone other than Sehun, only he didn’t notice it, and the thought itself sends an ugly, deep, coiling feeling to his guts. He turns, away from Joonmyeon’s direction, stares at the plain greyness of the cold wall.

When he finally falls asleep, there’s a strange sense of guilt etched under his skin. It still stings in the morning.

---

The filming of Pure Love begins in June, summer heat too scolding hot to bear. Kyungsoo goes swinging between their concert tour and shooting, with very limited time on his hands to spend some quality “alone-ness” in the dorm. The absence of Kyungsoo’s being makes Sehun put his head under cold water, seeking a kind of strange comfort in anything he can find; an evening out with Jongdae, an afternoon spent with Jongin and his dogs, a brunch shared with Joonmyeon, but none of them truly makes him feel any better. The past few months of indescribable, unpredicted heartbreak and gloominess spent in agony and wondering about that particular day at the practice room cannot just go away with few laughters. Not even with a true, hearty one, one that Sehun tries to entertain throughout June, when Kyungsoo is away most of the time.

The TV is on with Chanyeol’s face in the jungle on it when Kyungsoo comes home late at night, on a Sunday almost-morning. Sehun is somewhere between letting his eyes closing in shut and forcing them open, but the minute Kyungsoo steps in the living room, he’s wide awake. Every nestle Kyungsoo makes sounds ten times louder now with everyone gone to their respective rooms, only Sehun lounging around on the couch at this ungodly hour. Tomorrow they have practice for their concert, and Joonmyeon has been alarming him of it throughout the evening, but sleep hasn’t again come easy to Sehun this week, leaving him switching through channels all restless.

Kyungsoo’s tired, is the first thing Sehun notices. He puts his keys on the hanger swiftly, but the next moment he comes stumbling across the room, one thing Kyungsoo rarely does. Clumsiness is not an adjective of many to describe Kyungsoo, Sehun knows, and when Kyungsoo hits the pillow next to him, Sehun doesn’t think twice about circling his hands around his waist.

“Rough day?” Sehun asks, voice low, calm. Chanyeol’s face flashes on the screen.

“Just long,” Kyungsoo answers. “Had a lot of scenes today.”

His body has a sheen of sweet summer sweat all over it. Sehun collects them with his thumb as he swipes it over in circles on the back of Kyungsoo’s hand. “Maybe you should skip practice tomorrow.”

Kyungsoo’s eyes are fixed on the TV screen but his gaze is unfocused. Sehun wonders if he only sees colours and abstract shapes. “No, I’ll go,” Kyungsoo says, in return, a few heartbeats later. The sweat on Kyungsoo’s hand is slowly starting to dry, and Sehun stops drawing loops on his palm.

“Maybe you should go to sleep then,” is what Sehun says next. Kyungsoo looks down at their hands, almost intertwined. When Sehun starts to circle his thumb around Kyungsoo’s palm again, Kyungsoo stretches his fingers for Sehun’s to meet in the middle. It almost burns, the faint touch of Kyungsoo’s skin on Sehun’s, but it’s soft, almost like a feather. Almost like it isn’t there.

It’s a pure movement, lacking any kind of ulterior motive or menace, needing no response. Yet still, the undeniable force of wanting to put their hands together strikes Sehun with dispatch, something he cannot foresee, something that is impossible to outrun.

But want and incidence does not necessarily align. Kyungsoo’s hand is gone. He stands, starts for the bathroom. Sehun looks at him from across, the light in the hallway illuminating Kyungsoo’s sun-kissed skin that practically glows under white-ish led lights, and Sehun can’t help but think about ways to let Kyungsoo know that he wants his hand over his a little longer, a little more. By the door, Kyungsoo says, face slightly turned back to look at Sehun, “You should go to sleep too.”

“Okay, hyung,” Sehun says, but dwells there for a moment or two. Maybe Kyungsoo is just a really good friend with really beautiful skin, and a majestic voice, and deep brown eyes.

Sehun can’t really pinpoint out what brings him to follow Kyungsoo into the bathroom – need… want? –, yet he’s there, arm slightly pushing against the doorframe in a try-hard nonchalant way. Kyungsoo is too tired to take notice of him or even acknowledge his presence with a mere humm as he takes off his shirt.

Suddenly there’s not enough air for Sehun to breathe in, the walls turning in on him too soon, too fast. Kyungsoo is just standing there, right by the shower as he waits for the water to cool down, and with a facile move, one blink of an eye, he’s in, completely naked.

It’s not like they haven’t seen each other naked before. In fact, Sehun has seen the entire band in their natural state, especially Baekhyun, who doesn’t care about what anyone thinks. Oh, how Sehun wishes he was anything like Baekhyun. But he’s not. Instead, he’s standing in the bathroom, Kyungsoo about an arm and a full ocean away, in all of his naked sun-kissed wet glory, and he feels like a fool. How did he get here, exactly, again?

The shower stall opens. Cold air gushes all over Sehun’s body. “Are you getting in or not?” Kyungsoo says. Like it’s nothing.

Maybe it really is nothing. Maybe they’re really just nothing, and this moment of vulnerability as Sehun stands there, wordlessly taking his clothes off, is barely just a dream of feverish thoughts.

The water is cool enough to keep Sehun standing on both of his feet. Kyungsoo puts shower gel on a sponge, traces his skin with it over and over again. Sehun watches him, without a sound, because he doesn’t know what else to do. To be clear, he doesn’t know anything, not even lately. All he knows is Kyungsoo’s skin is beautiful and glowing and tan. He’s nothing like Sehun.

Kyungsoo turns to him then, offers him the sponge. It’s still wet and soapy, and Sehun can practically smell his own desperation over the scent of coconut shower gel. He finds himself mulling about the muscles on Kyungsoo’s back as he turns, reaching up for shampoo, the muscles that he has never seen before. How long has this been happening? How did Sehun not notice? And why does the simple thought of Kyungsoo being close to him send him into overdrive?

By the time he’s soaped himself up, Kyungsoo is out, a baby blue towel fastened low around his waist. Sehun has little to no time to comprehend the deficit of Kyungsoo’s body heat. Everything is happening so quick, like a sketchy dream, in a non-linear realm of disjointed occurrents. Sehun feels like he’s out of his body and mind, and Kyungsoo’s gone again, only a few patches of water left of him on the bathroom floor.

---

Sehun knows something is changing. Or, as Baekhyun says on a lovely, mildly hot August summer evening out on the roof of their apartment, stuffing their faces with ordered bulgoggi, “something has already been changed”.

“What do you mean?” Sehun says, mouth full of spicy rice cake. He very well knows what Baekhyun means, but it’s too soon to admit that. He’d rather play blind, like he’s been playing for who knows how long.

“You very well know what I mean,” Baekhyun says, pointedly. Sehun hates how he sees through a lot of things. Even more now, when he sees right through him. “Kyungsoo. And you. Or should I put it this way; your feelings for Kyungsoo?”

Sehun is compelled, at first, to say something opposing like “What, no,” or “Haha, you’re kidding me,” but nothing comes to his mind. It’s only blank, his heart, with a little vibrato at the base of his lungs and at the top of his stomach, sizzling with little heat and a nervous trembling. Somehow the half full bowl of bulgoggi seems disgusting right now, but he has no strength to push it away. An after-image of the practice room door and Kyungsoo’s tiny back pushed against it comes to him, accompanied by a ghost of Kyungsoo’s fingers against his flashes right before his eyes, clear, unabashed, unchanged. Then there’s the feeling: the feeling of not being good enough and being too much, too loud, too forgettable makes his heart sink, just a little, right where his stomach is pulsing with unkindness. Baekhyun sees right through him, but when has he ever not?

Baekhyun reaches out, takes the bulgoggi of Sehun’s hands, puts it on the ground. The sky is simmering in blues both pale and deep dark, underlined with a kind of warmness of the setting sun, painted in low oranges and yellows at the bottom. It’s only after he’s sitting fast and close next to Sehun, his hands around his shoulder when he says, “You’ve been out of focus lately… If you want to talk about it, I’m here.”

The closeness of Baekhyun is not unpleasant, but it’s nothing compared to Kyungsoo’s body heat hitting Sehun in the chest warm and kind and fast. Sehun feels like choking up, because, even if he tries not to, somehow he grew too fond of Kyungsoo and his many talents; his voice, his cooking, his body…

If Sehun could shout right now he would, he would let out a shriek so sharp it would almost represent his bleeding heart. Baekhyun senses his discomfort, so he pulls him closer, so close Sehun’s head fits under his perfect little chin. Baekhyun is as easy to hug as he is easy to love, something Sehun can’t identify with. An ugly bubble of jealousy boils up inside him, and now he’s full of colours, all sad blues and yellows of envy.

If he doesn’t speak now he’s going to burst, so he does what he has to do; at least this he knows, so he says, quietly, “Why does everything have to be so confusing and hard?”

Baekhyun’s hands are still around him, holding him in place so Sehun doesn’t completely fall apart. Sehun appreciates Baekhyun’s sensible nature, but somehow thinks nothing, not even Baekhyun’s emphatic solacement could ever take away these blues.

“That’s just life,” Baekhyun’s voice is soft. “It happens to everyone, every now and then.”

Sehun breaks away from Baekhyun to look him in the eye. “Does everyone feel this worthless as I do?”

“Having ups and downs sometimes is human,” Baekhyun responds. There’s a chill breeze swiping past them the moment these words roll off his tongue and Sehun feels helpless. “Not being able to comprehend our worth is human. Hell, some people never get to know their real worth. Having someone you like, and maybe falling in love with them, and maybe loving them unconditionally and getting nothing in return is human. Loving someone of… the same sex is okay. Even if your parents say otherwise. Even if society says otherwise. And I hope you know, Oh Sehun, that I love you. And I want the best for you. And I also want you to know that having complicated feelings is okay. Everybody has. Everybody has to, at some point in their life, face hardships. But we will pull you through. We are almost brothers, remember?”

A moment of silence passes between them. Sehun is trying to make sense out of Baekhyun’s words, even though Baekhyun has been clear from the very start. Damn, Baekhyun is really good at unfolding the deepest, darkest pits of Sehun’s irregularly beating heart, but Sehun does not yet know what Baekhyun’s words mean to him. Is he really– in love? With Kyungsoo hyung? Kyungsoo hyung, who cooks for him at midnight, who accompanies him to movies no other wants to watch with him; Kyungsoo hyung, who not only has a voice, but has the looks, the strength, the passion, the heart? Kyungsoo doesn’t usually have his heart out on his sleeves, at least, not like Sehun has his right now, laid out bare and raw in front of Baekhyun to touch. Because Baekhyun, out of all people, is now seeing it; the rush of sadness that escapes Sehun in form of tears, hot and wet down the side of his cheeks. He’s crying, in relief or grief, in realisation or deny he doesn’t know; all he knows is he’s crying, on the goddamn roof, his bulgoggi growing cold on the ground, with Baekhyun’s arms around him in a consoling manner.

There are times when Sehun is too lost, too deep in his thoughts to listen to anything that’s said to him. But this time he does, he really, truly listens, but Baekhyun’s words he cannot comprehend – yet. So he just cries, soundless, his broad shoulders shaking as he tries to wipe away tears that had been trying to break out ever since on that unfaithful day at the practice room.

“Good,” says Baekhyun, hand coming up to Sehun’s nape to linger a little bit. “We, I think, need to embrace sadness as well as we embrace happiness. Cry it out, Sehun-ah.”

So he cries and cries.

---

They say, after the rain comes the sun, and for Sehun it might just happen. The experience shared with Baekhyun on the roof with cold bulgoggi and mildly dark-yellow setting Sun and a lot of crying made Sehun feel ten times lighter in the chest. In some strange way, letting his emotions out in form of tears provided as a moderate temporary solution for an aching heart, even if Sehun was always sceptical of this form of pain-relief: he usually laughed away his tears with either too much dance or too many food, but this time around, crying his tiny heart out served him good, leaving him feeling a lot fresher in the morning. Not even the burnt toast Joonmyeon made him as a lame excuse of a breakfast took away his smile as he sat at the table, poking Jongin in the ribs with his index finger till Jongin had enough, pushing at him in revenge, and when it’s time for dance practice later, at around ten o’clock, nothing seems to make him feel down.

Until Kyungsoo appears. Because he does, he dares to show up in a slick black training suit, his hair a muzzled nest on the top of his head, with all of his brownish glowing skin, and Sehun suddenly feels a stone drop in his stomach, deep and low and hurting.

The uneasy feeling stays throughout dance practice. However hard he tries, he just simply can’t bear to look away from Kyungsoo’s reflection in the mirror, and the longing that has been keeping him up at night for the past several months makes him unable to coherently rehearse his lines, leaving him feeling all kind of different blues again.

Practice lets out at three in the afternoon, and everybody is up for lunch. Sehun doesn’t really have an appetite right now, seeing as how well Kyungsoo gets along with either Chanyeol or Jongin or Joonmyeon. Sehun sticks with Jongdae, sits close to him in the booth at their favourite diner with Kyungsoo across him.

Jongdae tells him bad jokes as Sehun watches Kyungsoo’s hand slide along Jongin’s shoulder, laughing at a very funny thing Chanyeol just said. Sehun couldn’t care less, he thinks, and turns back to Jongdae to feign a smile at another bad joke of his, the kind that only Baekhyun appreciates, but damn, halfway along the tenth shaggy dog story Baekhyun tells Jongdae, Sehun’s attention wanders back to the other side of the table. Apparently he cares, and wonders if Kyungsoo cares about him too the way he does about him. Wonders if that night in the shower meant the same to him as it did to Sehun. Oh wait, he doesn’t even know what it meant, or if it means anything at all. Questions he cannot yet answer flood his mind and the lightness he felt in the morning now seems so far away, even farther than Kyungsoo feels a few feet away to his upper right, laughing in a kind of joy Sehun can’t possibly share.

Above a table full of food and light chatter on both sides, Sehun still ponders, thinks about the times when his feelings were left unchanged and discerning happenings in life seemed easy and quick. Now, all he has is a depot of amphigoric thoughts and a confused heart and Kyungsoo is still sitting over at the table in his pretty tracksuit and pretty face and Sehun can’t think about anything else.

Somewhere between a bite of galbi and yet another fart joke from Baekhyun, Sehun’s fingertips start to tickle on end. Kyungsoo has reached over the table for a side dish, but missed and took Sehun’s hand instead. Sehun’s mouth goes dry as sand as Kyungsoo smiles at his own foolishness, and gives a light pat on Sehun’s hand before reaching over for kimchi. The chopsticks in Sehun’s hand are starting to slide off, and Sehun decides to collect himself. He won’t let the knot in his stomach stop him from eating all this delicious food, so he starts stuffing his face with various meats, korean barbeque first and foremost. Yixing laughs at him, says, “Sehun-ah, you’ll choke on your food, eat slowly,” but what Yixing doesn’t understand is, if Sehun stops forcing huge bites down his throat, he might as well suffocate from the knot in it.

“Sehun-ah has been working very hard lately,” Kyungsoo says. “He needs to eat well.”

“True that, but he’s eating like a machine,” says Baekhyun, puts a hand over Sehun’s shoulders mid-bite. “Sehun-ah, you’ve been showing us your many talents this past comeback, you shouldn’t kill yourself with too much barbeque. Right, Kyungsoo?”

It’s a huge bite that gets stuck in his throat and makes Sehun gag, Sehun would like to think, not Baekhyun’s rather smart remark to Kyungsoo. Baekhyun just smirks at him and Sehun thinks he wants to put his hands over his neck and just simply squeeze him to death, but that would be inappropriate in a diner Joonmyeon loves. And Sehun loves Joonmyeon, so he wouldn’t dare to make all of them get banned from here, so he sticks for killing Baekhyun mentally, maybe later on the roof of their dorm.

“Told ya you would suffocate considering the amount of unchewed meat you shoved down your face,” Jongdae laughs and Chanyeol snickers with him, clapping his hands together.

“Thanks for the reminder, hyung,” Sehun says in reply. Kyungsoo is just smiling at him, warm, kind, a heart-shaped smile Sehun could never erase from his memories, because the imprint would be always there. This, he determines, would he like to remember later, and not Jongdae’s unfunny jokes.

---

Staying in means wearing no clothes whatsoever while the others are out at their favourite bowling place. Sehun likes to call it ‘Hours’ with a capital H, indicating that it’s his very own, very special time he gets to spend by himself and himself only. Sometimes he likes to go out with the band, just to see the wrinkles of worry dissolve from Joonmyeon’s otherwise wrinkless face. They would go out and play games, mainly bowling, with Jongdae shouting over both Baekhyun’s and Chanyeol’s voice as Yixing sits behind them, snickering about something Joonmyeon just said to the others that has no effect on the shouting whatsoever. Jongin would lounge in one of the seats, popcorn all over his shirt, his hands, his mouth. And Kyungsoo – Kyungsoo would stand beside them, hands crossed on his chest, lips stretching far out into a wide smile at the others. Sehun does not know if he’s ready for yet another emotionally tumultuous day with either the Beagle-line or Kyungsoo, so he chooses to stay in, telling Minseok that it’s only because of tiredness.

Partly it’s true. He’s genuinely tired from all the photoshoots and commercials and concerts and music programs, but he’s also tired from a completely different aspect, something he only could ever share briefly with Baekhyun. Good old Baekhyun… if only he could lift the weight off Sehun’s chest so Sehun could breathe properly again and not with restrain or guilt or pain or tears.

Sehun doesn’t know how long he can stand this—this feeling, this sense of overwhelming thoughts, the feeling of not being good enough, of not being good of anything, of not being… Of not being enough. Simply. Truly. At all. Not for the band. Not for his parents. Not for the world. Not for Kyungsoo.

Is there a way to wipe my head clear of these thoughts?, he thinks to himself as he rolls over in bed to his other side. Or is he stuck in this blue nothingness forever with little to nothing to hold onto; not a single joy in life. Even food doesn’t taste the same as back then, back when he experienced happiness with the same intensity as he experiences these blue days of fog and self-loathing and question marks inside his head. There is, a possible way out, of course, is what he thinks the next minute, but the sadness comes back, kicking the front door to his heart open and leaving it torn into pieces without any kind of consolation; is that how it’s going to be always? For eternity? How does a person feel so low about themselves for this long – for months, not only a few weeks, but months, long months, on end and on end an on end. Without stopping. No rest to the sad heart. No rest to the sad mind, either.

He sits up straight, stares out the window. Summer is ending soon, trees that have been blossoming in green slowly turning into a harsh palette of browns and oranges. Everything around Sehun changes, but Sehun’s confusing feelings stay the same, the same as ever. Undiscernible. Hurting. As if someone took a knife and put it between Sehun’s ribs right through his skin and meat to the middle of his heart and left it bleeding. Nothing changes there.

Maybe it’s really all just tiredness. Work has been cruel, to be honest, this past year, especially on his body. He knows he’s losing weight. And he also knows it’s not the main reason.

It’s… and it’s hard to even think to himself, let alone to say it out loud, it’s because of Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo the beautiful, brave, the amazing, the muscular, the toned, the one with The Lips. The Voice. With everything Sehun doesn’t have. But what Sehun doesn’t especially have is, and what he’ll never could possess has nothing to do with how Kyungsoo looks. Or how Kyungsoo sings. Because those things can be changed; those things can be learned. What can’t be learned is how to have someone who’s heart is not reserved for you. Who’s not thinking of you the same way as you think of them. Who can’t, no matter how hard he tries, reciprocate those feelings for you. Because a person is a person; and not a thing to learn, or to change. A person has a mind of their own. And Sehun can’t possibly have that. Can’t have Kyungsoo when Kyungsoo doesn’t want him.

He glances outside then. There’s a tree, a single tree in the street, right at the front of their apartment block. Birds usually sit there and chirp all day long if the weather is nice enough. The sun is shining today, but there are no birds on the tree. Not one. It makes Sehun feel even worse, as if the simple knowing that today he is alone because he’s unable to engage in normal human contact on any levels wasn’t enough.

Maybe if he stared at the tree enough, some birds would come fly there and sit and chirp. But Sehun is no magician; he can’t make things go the way he wants. He can’t cast spells.

The front door is unlocked. Sehun hears it clicking open. He takes a look at the clock; it’s only half past six. The guys usually come home around one a.m., slightly drunk, irritably loud. It’s still too early for that.

He cranes his neck to take a peak through the open door – he’s almost scared how fast he recognises the footsteps coming in through the hall. Sehun just simply cannot know it by the sounds. Kyungsoo sticks his head in then, leans against the frame of the door. “Hey. Joonmyeon said you’d be home.”

“I am,” is what Sehun answers. He doesn’t know what else to say.

“Didn’t want to leave you all alone here, by yourself,” Kyungsoo says, closes the door behind him. It closes obnoxiously loud. “Can I sit with you?”

“Sure,” Sehun says, trying really hard to sound nonchalant, or at least not as wrecked as he feels. Kyungsoo sits next to him, clothed thighs slightly brushing up against Sehun’s naked ones. Sehun is now awfully aware of his own nakedness; he only has his super high gymshorts on, the bright blue one that Chanyeol always mocks him for having. He suddenly realises he feels exposed and it makes him shrink away from Kyungsoo, if even only by a few millimetres. Some sort of awkward silence takes a seat in between them, the kind that makes you fidget restlessly. Sehun often doesn’t know what to say; neither does Kyungsoo – but even in that aspect, there’s a gap between them; a gap in which Sehun is on one end, being the one who doesn’t know what to say – and Kyungsoo on the other, who knows what to, yet doesn’t know how. Sehun wishes he’d know what to, but wouldn’t be able to say – even in that way Kyungsoo is someone he looks up to. It’s hard. It’s hard to know your flaws and live with them, especially if those flaws are what restrain you from living your life to the fullest. And Sehun always wants the best. Always wants things he doesn’t have. What he cannot have.

“Sehun-ah, don’t frown this much,” Kyungsoo says then, makes Sehun whip his head towards him. Kyungsoo is dressed in full black, and he looks sleek, breathtaking even. How Sehun wishes he could peel away the black layers and reach beneath Kyungsoo’s skin to take a grip at his heart the same way Kyungsoo is squeezing Sehun’s right now. How he wishes he could do that, but he can’t, and shouldn’t, because Kyungsoo is his friend, brother, bandmate, ex-roommate… everything and nothing to him all at once.

Kyungsoo too, is looking at him right now, all deep brown eyes and dark eyebrows knocking together in a questionable way, like he’s thinking too hard about something.

“What?” Sehun asks. It comes out weak and breathless. He pulls his knees up higher on the bed so he can lay a hand around them, as if hiding from Kyungsoo, even though he very well knows he can’t.

“Wow, I just,” Kyungsoo says, looking down and away, pushing a hand through his hair. It’s cut short and even, laying perfectly onto his sun-kissed bronze skin on the sides. “I just realised something. Something I shouldn’t exactly be feeling… and yet…”

Deep breath and exhale. All the things Sehun thought he wanted to say are completely gone. In fact, all of his thoughts are far away. He says, with struggle, “What did you just realise, hyung?”

There’s a drop of sweat rolling down Kyungsoo’s nape, straight from his hairline disappearing into his loose black t-shirt. Summer has come to an end, as had Sehun’s thoughts just moments ago, and here he is now, following the trail Kyungsoo’s sweat makes all the way down his neck. It’s tempting to reach out and collect it with his fingers, brushing away the wetness and leaving traces of a tender touch on Kyungsoo’s skin.

“Something I don’t exactly understand… Nor am sure about,” Kyungsoo says. There is no trembling in his voice, no hesitance. He’s saying it like it’s a fact, like it’s easy to talk about such things, when Sehun perfectly knows it’s not Kyungsoo’s best feature. “And I’m not exactly sure about how could this thing… my realisation… affect you.”

Sehun’s heart beats like crazy. “Well… if you just told me, hyung… Maybe we could see the outcome.”

Kyungsoo turns quiet awhile. His hand rests on his thighs. Not quite sure how to continue, Sehun takes a glance at Kyungsoo, head hanging low as if he doesn’t dare to really look at him. All he sees is just a soft nervous tremble that radiates off Kyungsoo now, and it makes Sehun uneasy, equally nervous. He knows this something that could either break them or mend them together, but he doesn’t know how to say it out loud.

He wants to say something, or do something, maybe just a nudge of a knee or a slight touch of an index finger -- but before he knows, the moment is gone, and Kyungsoo is on the other side of the room, gingerly clasping at the doorframe.

“I’m... I’m sorry Sehun-ah. Forget it. I am just tired.”

And with that, he’s out the door, leaving Sehun with all this inner turmoil and indecisiveness alone. He looks at his hands. The sweat has gone cold on his palms.

---

Weeks pass with promotions and dance practices and interviews, but all he thinks about is the last month - Kyungsoo has been very nice to him lately, and that is something Sehun can’t quite put his finger on. Not like Kyungsoo isn’t nice on a daily basis; he is a man with a great sense of politeness and good manners, characteristics that resolve in everybody loving Kyungsoo. What is there not to love? Sehun likes to think he is just as polite as Kyungsoo is, but who is he trying to fool? The only thing they truly share is their quietness – nothing else. Sehun is nothing like Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo is nothing like Sehun, and Sehun wonders if that palpable difference between them could dissolve one day.

[sehun keeps wondering about kyungsoo; the days go just like that. this is the era of “its ok its love” and sehun’s feelings for kyungsoo deepens as time goes farther. kyungsoo gets more affectionate towards sehun while sehun wonders if that is all that is; two good friends, holding hands sometimes and being affectionate with each other but every time kyungsoo puts his hands on his waist his heart beats faster, harder, irregular. sehun knows somethings’ changing, and he keeps wondering about his worth, about his abilities or lack thereof. kyungsoo is always there for him to assure him of his worth, to make him feel not so empty inside. sehun starts to wonder about what you want and what you have; if the two can align. can you get what you want, or you should get what you need? whats the difference between want and need? what if we could never get what we truly want or need? we cant have everything sehun knows, but he keeps wanting kyungsoo until the very day that he realises he really, really, really does want it. he doesn’t know how he wants kyungsoo, all he knows is kyungsoo’s presence makes him feel tingly and good and happy. meanwhile sehun realises kyungsoo is just as defenseless and self concious as he is, and they develop a very close friendship, a friendship that’s not yet enough for sehun. one time, around the promotions of another winter lovesong exo puts out regularly, on a slightly drunken night of winning a music program, sehun kisses kyungsoo and they start an affair of purely physical love. sehun is in too deep, even when he knows he wants emotional love as well as physical. kyungsoo is affectionate to him but he is affectionate to the other members as well which leaves sehun all sad, and begins to wonder about wanting and having. whats the endgame I don’t know yet, but I know the last words will be this: when he leaves, he leaves the door open.

ok so the physical side of love continues until sehun cant take it anymore; after wondering about months and months of what this means to him, he goes to ask kyungsoo about it. kyungsoo is surprisingly calm during the talk, explaining to sehun that he too, as sehun could notice, wants the affectionate closeness but not the emotions; hes not in love with sehun nor will he ever be; he doesn’t want anything more than there is. sehun is, at first, devastated, but later realises that that’s how life is; you truly can’t always get you what you want. after he accepted the fact that kyungsoo doesn’t want anything else, he feels thankful for kyungsoo of showing him so many things; of teaching him to love himself through the physical and emotional acts; to teaching him the difference between need and want indirectly. once sehun realises all these things, they stay good and close friends, although the memories of being more than that but not quite anything still mars sehun’s mind. a year later in a café he meets a boy with auburn hair, someone who he can connect with. in the end, sehun is happy and in love and is secure with himself, continuing his time with exo and being best friends with kyungsoo. a bittersweet ending!]

#sesoo #hunsoo #sedo #kyungsoo #sehun #d.o.#exo #fic #shortfic #bold-lettered #what a beautiful time it was to be alive #such an era #such boys #such love

22 notes · View notes

latetaektalk · 5 years ago

Text

break up with me | osh [1]

he and you had been playing pretend for months now, but you couldn’t do it anymore.

genre: break up! au, established relationship! au, angst

word count: 3.157

a/n: uh, so i’ve finally decided to post something! this is my first time posting something and i’d just like to add that english isn’t my first language. hope you guys enjoy it!

masterlist

You stared in front of you and collected your thoughts for a moment. The light in the hallway flooded a little into the living room and you let out a sigh. Your body hit the back of your sofa and your eyes travelled to your right, into the hallway. You watched Sehun take off his jacket and walk into your bedroom. In the distance, you could hear Sehun sigh and not even a second later, the door fell shut. The sound of it echoed throughout your flat and you cringed a little.

Your gaze wandered back into the living room and you put on your glasses to give the clock a look. 04:24. Sehun’s touch on your face had felt so faint that you weren’t sure that if he had woken you up like that, by touching your face, by touching you. The TV had been turned off which meant that Sehun had definitely woken you up, one way or another. When you opened your eyes, Sehun had already walked away. Only the smell of his aftershave and a hint of alcohol served as evidence of him being in the same room as you.

You let your hand run through your hair as you looked for your phone. Soon enough you were on Instagram and opening Chanyeol’s story to see Baekhyun, Jongin, Sooyoung, Chanyeol, Joohyun and Sehun having dinner and drinks at some new restaurant. There were more clips of them all drinking and joking around, but you didn’t watch them. Instead decided to turn off your phone. You threw it to your side and closed your eyes, your head hitting the back of your neck.

How long has it been since Sehun and you had gone out to have dinner? How long has it been since Sehun and you had shared more than 5 words? How long has it been since Sehun and you had been in the same room with each other and not sleeping? How long has it been since Sehun had stopped loving you?

A tear ran down your temple and disappeared into your hair. You pressed your lips together to silence the sob that wanted to spill. With your arms folded around your stomach, you held onto yourself.

“Fuck.”

A few months ago Sehun would have come out by now and asked you why it was taking you so long to get back to bed. No, a few months ago Sehun wouldn’t have even gone to bed without you. He would have maybe woken you up and scolded you for sleeping on the sofa with the TV on or he would have carried you to bed and scolded you in the morning, but he would have never ever left you in the living room without a single word after waking you up.

Things had, however, changed.

They had happened slowly and gradually, the changes. It started with Sehun forgetting to tell you that he was going somewhere after work or class and then transitioned into him not telling you that he loved you anymore and then gone into him not touching or talking to you at all.

And you had just sat there and let everything happen. Because you knew Sehun. You knew that when the changes had happened that there was nothing that you or he could do anymore. It was a fight that you two had already lost without either of you noticing it until it was too late.

Sehun didn’t love you anymore.

You got up and shoved your phone into your pocket. You wiped any evidence of tears from your face because Sehun might not love you anymore, but he still cared for you. At least you liked to think that. Wiping away tears with glasses was awkward and in those moments you wished you didn’t have them. The light in the hallway was still on and you turned it off as you walked into your bedroom.

Sehun’s jacket was thrown over his chair and you already knew without looking that Sehun was in bed. He always was after getting home, it was the only thing he came home to do, sleep.

In the darkness, you could make out that he was in bed. You walked to your side and your steps were light, empty. You crawled onto the mattress and slipped underneath your blanket, pulling some of it to you. When your hair fell in front of your face, you tucked it back and put your glasses on your night table. Sehun shuffled and you turned your head to him. You were staring at his black and blurry hair like he could feel it and then face you and give you a kiss.

You knew without having to check that Sehun was pretending to be asleep. A sigh slipped past your lips and you hated how broken it came out. Tears blurred your vision and you shut your eyes, turning on your side to let silent curses roll off your tongue.

You squeezed your eyes shut and just silently cried yourself to sleep. Here you were laying in the same bed with the man you love, oh, so much. But he didn’t love you, he had stopped loving you an eternity ago.

“You listening, Y/N?”

You snapped out of your thoughts and stared at Joohyun, who was quirking her brows at you. A smile crept up on your lips and you let out a chuckle, apologising to Joohyun for not listening.

“Everything okay?”, she asked you and crossed her arms in front of her chest as she eyed you from head to toe. You wanted to squirm underneath her gaze. It was like she was staring through you, reading every thought that crossed your mind.

It wasn’t convincing, but you mustered up a smile. By the look Joohyun gave you, you knew that she wasn’t buying it at all. You weren’t going to get out of this by fake smiling at her. Your gaze wandered down and you stared at the empty plates in front of you. The little bits of cream and chocolate were the only traces of the cakes that Joohyun and you had gone out to eat.

The noise of people talking around you, ordering their food bounced off of you. You wished you could enjoy this time with Joohyun more, be there in the moment with her. Your mind, however, couldn’t stop thinking about Sehun.

“What’s wrong?”, Joohyun asked softly and leaned forward, giving you her undivided attention. You sighed and looked up to her. A small smile traced your lips and you made a note to yourself to treat Joohyun when you went out for cake again.

You took a deep breath and rubbed your hands on your pants. You hadn’t told anyone about the problems Sehun and you were having because you were scared to. But at the same time, you wanted to rant and vent. There was this need in you. You just wanted to scream and cry and talk to someone about all of the worries that had been plaguing you for months.

“Sehun.”, you started and Joohyun shuffled closer to you and you were sure if it weren’t for the table separating you, she would have taken your hand into hers. “We’ve been having problems.”

Joohyun let out a small breath and knitted her brows together. You could see in her eyes how she was working on things to say, but the shock made it hard for her to think of something. She opened her mouth and closed it again, eyes staring into yours as she let the first words slip past her lips.

“Oh.”, she started slowly and with each second she seemed more unsure of what to say. “You guys been fighting?”

You shook your head. Sometimes you asked yourself if that would be better. At least then you would be talking, but the few fights that Sehun and you had had always ended with both of you in tears. That would probably hurt you even more, to see Sehun crying.

“For us to be fighting, we would have to be talking.”

“You guys don’t talk to each other?”

You reached for your napkin and started to tear it into small pieces. Your right leg bounced up and down and you knew your mother would tell you to stop. Your silence was enough of an answer for Joohyun and she let out a long drawn out breath.

“Can I ask why?”, Joohyun spoke quietly and she was careful not to push you too far. For a second you stopped ripping your napkin into pieces before you resumed to it again.

You appreciated how Joohyun never flooded you with questions. She always considered your feelings before speaking. If you had told this to, for example, Yerim or Sooyoung, you were sure that both of them would overwhelm you with the sheer number of questions. You loved both of them dearly, but being questioned just wasn’t what you needed right now.

“Sehun, he-”, you cringed at how shaky the words came out and you wished you could muster up more strength. Worry spread across Joohyun’s face and she stared at you and waited instead of pushing you to spit it out. “He, uhm, I mean I don’t know- well, I do know. I just, you know, hope that I’m, well, wrong, but I don’t think- I don’t think I am. It’s just- there are things and they have, well, changed-“

You were practically word vomiting and you stopped yourself. There was no way Joohyun could understand you. At least not when you rambling like that. You were procrastinating to say the words out loud, to say that why Sehun and you weren’t talking to each other anymore was because Sehun didn’t love you anymore. It would become the reality if you said it and you had never told anyone. You had known long enough, but saying it out loud for somebody to hear was just different and a lot scarier.

“Sehun doesn’t love me anymore.”

Joohyun seemed not to understand right away because she looked at you like you were joking. You guessed that she thought that you were pulling one bad joke on her, but when she saw the pain in your eyes and no trace of a smile, it hit her. Her back hit the chair’s and she scrunched up her face in pity and confusion.

“Oh fuck.”

You had to smile because ever since you had been friends with Joohyun, you had heard her curse five times and she only did because someone or something had scared her. Her first intentional curse was because of you and in any other context, you would have pointed that fact out and patted yourself on the shoulder.

But you had this dark cloud looming over you that sucked all of your energy out of you. You let your hand run through your hair and push your glasses back into their place. When you looked at your napkin, you cringed. It was barely resembling one anymore, the small pieces of it littered your plate. You couldn’t help but compare your napkin to your broken heart.

“Are you sure?”

Your eyes travelled to Joohyun and you tilted your head to the side. You wished that you could tell her that you weren’t, but you were. For a second you contemplated lying because you hated the way she was looking at you right now. It was the pity in her eyes that made you sick. You knew Joohyun meant it well. She wouldn’t be pitying you if she didn’t care about you, but you just felt so small whenever someone took pity on you.

“Yeah.”, you breathed out and silence settled between you two. Joohyun took her time to process the new information and you just let yourself slip back into your thoughts, let yourself reminiscent a little, think back, remember memories.

“Oh my god, Sehun.”, you screamed and placed your hand over your heart to calm down. Your keys had been thrown away and had landed on your floor, next to your door, leading into your living room. And that was where Sehun had been sitting, waiting for you, scrolling through his phone and scaring the living crap out of you when you came home.

“Hi, Y/N.”, he greeted you and checked his phone. “You’re late.”

You scrunched up your brows and shook your head, picking up your keys. With your eyes trained on Sehun, you walked into your living room and let your bag slip past your shoulder and onto the floor.

“What are you talking about? How’d you even get in? I thought I had told you to give back your spare keys.”, you asked and pushed your glasses up, taking your jacket off and throwing it onto the couch, right next to Sehun. Instead of taking a seat, you decided to stand in front of him because you had a feeling that you had to scold Sehun. He had been coming into your flat unannounced for quite some time now and it had seriously gotten out of hand, in your opinion.

“Your last class was two hours ago. You should have been home 90 minutes ago.”, Sehun explained and just ignored your second question. You weren’t sure if he was serious right now. Who did he think he was?

You raised your brows at him and folded your arms in front of your chest. Sehun could see that something was building up in you and he realised that you weren’t really happy to see him. Instead of giving you a chance to scold him, he told you why he was here in the first place.

“Mia and I broke up.”

Your whole face fell and your scowl melted away. With your mouth open, you looked at Sehun and your eyes tried to figure out how he felt. There were no traces of tears or anger or really anything. In fact, Sehun seemed to be just fine. But then again it was Sehun. He always had this indifferent look, but that didn’t mean that he was necessarily fine.

“H-how are you? You okay?”, you asked and you weren’t sure what to do really. You liked to think that you were good at cheering someone up, but you didn’t know how Sehun wanted you to feel. “What do you need me to be? Angry? Sad-”

“I’m fine.”, Sehun interrupted you, but his eyes didn’t meet yours. He instead stared at his phone that he was tilting back and forth in his hand. You cringed and let silence take over, knowing that Sehun was going to speak up before you knew it. Because that was what he wanted from you. He wanted you to crack him, not let him get away with this bullshit. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have come to you but Chanyeol instead. He didn’t say it out loud, but his ‘I’m fine.’ meant just that, you knew.

“Really. Just fine.”, he insisted.

You raised your brows when Sehun finally looked at you and he cracked a smile at you, one that didn’t reach his eyes. He scratched his neck and you tilted your head at him.

“I am, Y/N!”, he said with more force behind his words. The smile that played on his lips could maybe fool others, but not you. You knew better, you knew Sehun. “I’m fine. Honestly. Fine.”

The longer you didn’t say anything, the more nervous Sehun got. He wanted to squirm underneath your gaze just like you wanted to underneath Joohyun’s. You were stubborn and he knew that you were.

You crossed your arms in front of your chest and tilted your head even more to the side. Your eyes were fixed on Sehun and there wasn’t a single movement of his that you would miss. You watched him bounce his leg up and down, chew on his tongue, lick his lips and you knew that with each second that he was cracking, but Sehun wouldn’t admit that. He was almost as stubborn as you, almost.

“Y/N, stop looking at me like that.”, he laughed like this was some joke and you just frowned. “I said I’m fine-”

“Then why are you here?”

Your question slapped the words right out of Sehun and he stared at you with his jaw going slack, unable to muster up some answers. You had to bite down the small smile that almost found its way to your lips, you would rub your win into his face later.

“I-”

Sehun couldn’t finish his sentence, of course, he couldn’t. What was he supposed to say? You uncrossed your arms and let out a sigh.

“I’ll get a chair and some water. In the meantime, you can think of some bullshit excuse and when you’re ready we can talk about everything.”

“What are you thinking about?”, Joohyun asked softly and you looked up to her. You licked your lips and tucked a strand away, sitting up a little straighter.

“Remember Mia? Remember how Sehun started to go out with us again right before she broke up with him?”, you started and Joohyun frowned as she tried to remember. Her eyes were focused on the ceiling and for a moment she seemed unsure. She started to nod, gaze travelling back to you.

“Yeah, sure. Mia never could come, she had to work or study.”, Joohyun recalled the reasons Sehun had told you whenever one of you asked about Mia’s whereabouts when you were out. She hadn’t connected the dots yet, but you had. “Why?”

“Do you know why she broke up with Sehun?”, you asked and Joohyun looked at you with big eyes, not certain what point you were trying to make right now.

“Well, no. He never wanted to talk about it.”, Joohyun said and you nodded slowly. You licked your lips and put your elbow on your armrest, your check falling against your open hand. Tears collected in your eyes and Joohyun let out a small gasp when she saw them.

“He was with you guys yesterday? Dinner at this new restaurant?”, you said and you didn’t need Joohyun to answer your questions. You already knew the answers and with your next blink, your tears spilt. Joohyun grew more worried, but she knew that you didn’t want her to come to your side and hug you. “You know why I wasn’t there?”

“Yeah. He said you were tired from studying.”, Joohyun mumbled and you stared into her eyes. Slowly she seemed to see what you were trying to say and your tears blurred her crumbling face.

“Sehun told me he didn’t love Mia anymore.”, you whispered and for some reason, Joohyun could hear you even though the café was filled with people. The smell of coffee and cake made you nauseous and you could have thrown up right there and then. “That’s why they broke up.”

masterlist

#exo #sehun #oh sehun #exo fanfiction #exo fanfic #exo x reader #exo series #exo angst #exo scenarios #exo imagines #sehun x reader #sehun fanfiction #sehun fanfic #sehun series #sehun angst #sehun scenario #sehun imagine #break up with me 1 #linh.fic

336 notes · View notes

marshmallow-phd · 4 years ago

Text

Catching Rain

Part of The Untamed - EXO Wolf Universe

Genre: Wolf!AU

Pairing: Minseok x Reader

Summary: You were more than satisfied with your life. You attended a nice college, had nice friends, a nice boyfriend. That’s what your life was: nice. You weren’t looking for anything more, so what were you to do when this seemingly harmless boy walked into your life and turned your nice little world into one much more dangerous?

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I Epilogue

On closer inspection, the house in the middle of the field was quite pretty. Simple, white, well kept. A secondary building with metal walls sat adjacent to the house – a garage, perhaps. Waiting on the porch was the man from earlier. Baekhyun. Now you remembered his name. He was joined by a few others – Chanyeol, Sehun, and one you didn’t know – who stared at you in curious wonder. Their eyes were wide and investigative, as if you were the supernatural creature and not Minseok.

“Looks like the cat’s out of the bag,” Baekhyun said with a snicker.

“Or pup, in this case,” said the one you didn’t know. Black hair that fell over his forehead and an upturn sat in both corners of his lips, though he wasn’t smiling.

Minseok merely shook his head as he pushed past them into the house. The screen door shut with a loud slam. You flinched at the noise. Chanyeol sighed as he glanced at you. “Would you like something to drink?”

“Yes, please,” you nodded. He motioned for you to follow him inside.

Through a short front parlor and a cozy living room, he led you into the kitchen where you stood awkwardly. The only noise came from the water flowing from the refrigerator spicket. The ice clinked as it moved around the glass. Your eyes wandered across the large, open space. Sunlight poured in from the windows in the two outer walls. It gave the whole room a yellow hue despite the white and light gray coloring of the cabinets and backsplash. Whoever had last designed this room had done so in a way to make it feel bigger and open, welcoming even. You wondered if there must have been a woman living here to give the finer touches. Minseok hadn’t mentioned anyone beyond his male roommates. The thought of a woman living amongst them made you slightly jealous, but you shoved it aside when Chanyeol held out the glass for you.

“Thank you,” you murmured before taking a sip.

He nodded shyly. His foot tapped lightly against the hard wood floor with his hands shoved into his pockets. He looked everywhere except for at you. Feeling eyes on you anyway, you glanced over your shoulder just in time to see several crops of hair disappear from the hallway entrance.

You scoffed. “You guys act like you’ve never seen a female before.”

“Not one like you.”

Minseok stepped into the room wearing a t-shirt with frayed edges where the sleeves had been cut off and a pair of basketball shorts. As angry as you were with him, the distrust still very much apparent, you were fighting the urge to run to him. What was this stupid, conflicting feeling? Making eye contact with Minseok, Chanyeol ducked his head and hurriedly left the kitchen.

“So,” you crossed your arms after putting down the glass and leaned against the counter, “is this the part where you explain to me what the hell is going on?”

“I will, but not here.”

“No, you don’t get to do that!” you snapped. “You didn’t want to tell me in the forest, so we came back here and now you don’t want to tell me here?”

Minseok shrunk back. “I just meant down here. Can we go upstairs? Away from where the others can hear?”

That suggestion could be accepted. Actually, you felt a little bad for exploding, but could you really be blamed? Given the information dump you were steadily receiving today? “Oh. Okay. Lead the way.”

Minseok’s hand twitched at his side, but he kept it in check as he turned and headed back up the stairs. The top spilled out into a hallway lined with doors. This space wasn’t as bright as the kitchen. Different shades of dark brown covered the wooden floor and plaster walls. No windows gave view to the outside making you feel trapped. “This one’s mine,” Minseok said. He held on to a handle of one of the middle doors and waited for you to come closer before pushing it open. When you saw what lied beyond the door, you nearly smiled.

On the walls were posters of famous soccer players and indie movies you’d never heard of. The bed was made with military precision, not a creased comforter or half-strewn pillow in sight. Against the far wall under a singular window was a desk. The notebooks were stacked in the top right corner, the edges so straight a ruler wouldn’t be able to find fault. Pens and pencils occupied a small cup to keep the rest of the desk clear.

“Not what you expected?” Minseok asked as he closed the door.

“Yes and no.” You stole a glance at him over your shoulder. “It’s very… neat.”

Minseok smiled shyly. He shuffled over to the bed and sat down. If he expected you to take the spot next to him, he was wrong. Instead, you chose the chair. A precaution for yourself.

Neither of you knew where to start. Who was supposed to talk first? What part should even be considered the beginning? Unable to continue in this awkward silence, you jumped in feet first.

“You can really… turn into a wolf?” The words felt like glue in your throat. Creatures like that belonged in fairytales and fantasy films, not a college campus.

“Yeah,” Minseok said. “We all can. All nine of us.”

“All nine.” Oh, great. A whole pack of them. “Even the one’s I met?” Stupid question. He’d already answered that, technically. But Minseok simply nodded instead of calling out the redundancy. “So, were you all bitten or-” You felt ridiculous basing the current situation on myth and legend, but what else did you have to go on?

“We’re all born this way. You can’t be like us from a bite or a scratch. It has to be in your DNA.” He snuck a peek before beating you to the next question. “The moon doesn’t really influence us either. I mean, its easier to see by at night in the forest, but it doesn’t force us to change. We can do that whenever we want. Witches have more of a connection with the giant rock in the sky.”

“Witches! They’re real, too? What else is real? Vampires? Dragons? Goblins?” What kind of world had you stumbled into?

Minseok flinched. “Maybe we should stick to one subject at a time.”

“Right.” That was probably best for your sanity. “So, if you have to be born like,” you gestured to him, “… this, does that mean both of your parents were, too?”

“Just my dad,” Minseok said. “Females wolves are extremely rare.”

“Well, that’s sexist.”

“Hey, we didn’t make up the rules. It’s genetics.” He scratched the back of his neck, twitching his lips from side to side. “I guess I should say that silver doesn’t bother us either.”

Why did you feel relieved at that random fact? It didn’t matter, as that wasn’t the most pressing issue to you. “Earlier you mentioned that it wasn’t you killing the campers-”

“It wasn’t any of us!”

“I believe you.” The words tumbled off your lips. And you realized that it was true. You couldn’t twist the nervous, sweet guy in front of you into a mindless killer. The way he was explaining everything slowly, cautiously, giving you time to understand. He wasn’t hiding anything from you. Not anymore. “I’m just confused when you said it was an omega?”

“Its just a ranking system within a pack,” he explained. “Alpha, beta, MR, omega. Junmyeon’s the alpha of our pack, he’s in charge. Yixing and I are betas, second in command. We help enforce Junmyeon’s word and keep an eye on the younger wolves who like to cause mischief.” He chuckled, as if remembering times when said mischief occurred. “The rest are all MR – Mid-ranking. They all have their own duties should they be needed. Well, except for Jongin and Sehun. They’re the youngest wolves so they get special treatment most of the time. Its okay, though. They kind of make you want to take care of them, the way they are.”

You nodded filing all the information away for later recall. “And the omega?”

“A wolf without a pack. Nine times out of ten they were kicked out for defying the alpha, for putting their own interests ahead of the pack. Without that structure, a lot of them turn feral.”

“Nine times out of ten?”

“It’s extremely rare, but sometimes a wolf will choose to never join a pack in the first place. It’s nearly unheard of though. We’re too social of creatures. Nine-point-five out of ten would probably be a better number.”

You couldn’t help the laugh that came out. Of course he would bring up math in a time like this. Minseok laughed along with you. Eventually, though, it died out, along with the smile that had been growing on his lips. “There’s something else I need to tell you.”

Picking up on his mood, you tilted your head to the side. “I don’t think anything else could take me by surprise at this point.” Minseok stared at you pointedly. Your stomach began to sink. What other little secret could he possibly be harboring at this point? You didn’t think anything could be as shocking as his shapeshifting abilities.

“Have you ever heard the expression ‘wolves mate for life’?” he asked cryptically.

“Yeah?”

“Well-” he shifted, crinkling the perfect comforter in the process. “We don’t know why it happens. Junmyeon thinks its nature’s way of compensating our ‘otherness’ while Jongdae just thinks it’s another level of torture.” An uncomfortable laugh. “But, um, every wolf has their own mate. Just one, that they stick with for the rest of their lives.”

Unable to keep looking at him, you leaned forward, resting your elbows on your knees. “So, are you saying that you all get to pick whoever you want as your mate and that’s it? You claim them because of what you are?”

“No!” Minseok jumped to his feet. Swallowing visibly, he cleared his throat, but remained standing. “No, we don’t get to pick. It happens out of nowhere. Our mates are chosen for us before either is born. And we can meet them under any circumstances. Some favorable, some… not so much.”

You looked up at him “What are you trying to say, Minseok?”

He walked up to you, each step hesitant, each step full of fear. Crouching down, he sighed as he looked into your eyes. “What I’m trying to say, (y/n), is that… you’re my mate.”

At first, you only blinked. The words had to be soaked in one at a time before you could piece them together and understand the sentence as a whole. “I- what? How do you even know?”

Reaching out, Minseok took ahold of your hand. You didn’t fight it. The electricity was practically singing between your skins. “Really, all it takes is one look. A few seconds of eye contact and the pull takes hold. But this feeling we both get when we touch, its confirmation. And then there’s this.”

He pulled your hand closer, pressing your palm against his chest. The heat transferring through the thin fabric was enough to make you sweat, but that wasn’t the point of this exercise. It was the rate of which his heart was beating. As he stared at you with awe, his heart sprinted as if it were in second place of a race and needed to pass just one more runner to win.

“Every time I see you, this happens,” Minseok whispered. “It doesn’t matter how good my day has been, its always better when I’m with you.”

“We haven’t even known each other that long.”

“It doesn’t take long, apparently.”

You frowned, confused. “Apparently?”

A small smile pulled up one corner of his mouth. “I’m the first one in the pack to find my mate. The first one to experience this.”

The first…. You wanted to laugh at the romantic angle your brain was seeing this.

A knock came from the door. Minseok stood up, reluctantly dropping your hand before answering the intrusion. “Yeah?”

Several roommates were standing in the hall, all peering around Minseok to get a better look at you.

“Kyungsoo said it was time for dinner,” one of them said. “And that he could hear your mate’s empty stomach from downstairs.”

“And it took all of you to come tell us?” Minseok questioned as he folded his arms. He shifted to block more of the doorway, shielding you from their stares.

“It was an important job,” another one said.

Minseok looked back at you before sighing. “Tell Kyungsoo that I’ll be down in a second.”

“But-”

The door was shut before the argument could be finished. The rush of footsteps faded in the background until it was only the two of you once again.

“Are you hungry?” Minseok asked. You nodded sheepishly. “You don’t have to go downstairs. You can stay here and I’ll bring it up to. Kyungsoo’s a good cook so whatever he made will be delicious.”

“Actually, I’ll go down with you,” you said, to the surprise of both of you. Everything Minseok had told you was still sinking in. There was too much to process and completely comprehend, but the pieces were fitting together. And you were curious about life here. If you really were meant to be his mate, maybe you should know where that road led. It was the right at the fork. You’d uncovered a sign that gave you a clue to where it was headed. You wanted to follow it.

Minseok waited patiently as you stood up and walked towards him. He let you out the door first. There was a moment where your fingers brushed as you passed. You could feel the muscles in his hand tighten. He wanted to take your hand again – and you almost let him. But you held back. There was still something stopping you. Or, rather, a who.

The noise hit you halfway down the stairs. Being told that nine people lived together and truly witnessing it were two very different concepts. There was no order that you could see. Most of the boys sat around the table, conducting multiple conversations at once that overlapped that you had to wonder how they could understand each other. A few sat in a small booth off to the side in a world of their own. It was the kind of breakfast nook you’d only seen before in home magazines. Two boys stood at the counters, their backs to the chaos behind them.

One of them – sporting a very well put together look and black rimmed glasses – turned and smiled at you and Minseok. “There you are. Glad to see you came down.” He held his hand out to you. “I’m Junmyeon.”

“The alpha,” you said as you shook his hand.

“I see Minseok told you most of it,” Junmeyon said.

“Pretty much everything,” Minseok corrected.

You felt your face contort as you tried to pinpoint where you’d seen this man before. “Wait. Aren’t you a professor?”

Junmyeon laughed. “Yeah, I am. In the literature department. Folklore, to be exactly. But I’d prefer if we kept this between us.” He sent you a wink to show he was teasing. Behind you, Misneok growled, making you jump. “I’m just playing, Minseok.”

“And I’m sure he’ll be playing when he rips your head off,” the other stove-top occupant stated. He held out a plate for you piled high with food. There was no way you would be able to eat all of that. “I’m Kyungsoo, by the way.”

“(y/n),” you greeted back. “It’s nice to meet you.” Taking the plate, you tried to hand it off to Minseok.

“No, that’s yours.”

Not wanting to be rude, you said between gritted teeth, “I can’t eat all of this.”

Minseok pinched his face as if debating on something. “Fine. We’ll share.”

“Are you sure about that?” Junmyeon asked. “There won’t be any left over for seconds. You know that.”

“It’ll be fine.”

Shaking his head, Kyungsoo held on to one side of the plate and added another scoop of rice and meat each. “Just in case.”

After thanking him, Minseok guided you over to the table with a hand hovering over your lower back. Even without the contact, you could feel the heat coming from his palm. Or maybe it was just your imagination filling in. Minseok pulled out a chair for you on the empty end before sitting next you. It was obvious he’d purposefully placed you away from the others.

“Possessive much?” Baekhyun snorted as he dug into a plate of his own.

“I’m sure it’s just instinct.” The comment came from one of the more slender boys – Boys? Wolves? You weren’t sure how to address them properly. Maybe later. Your brain needed a break. The one who had spoken had a very pointed face, but in a way that was still handsome. You weren’t sure if you’d seen him before or not.

“That’s Yixing,” Minseok said. “And the last one to meet, I guess, is Jongdae.”

Jongdae turned out to be the curled-lip one who still wasn’t smiling. In fact, he was the only one not in some level of a cheerful mood as he sat in the breakfast booth. He barely looked at you while everyone else was. Some were even blatantly staring at you as they shoveled in food to their mouths.

“You should eat.” Minseok picked up a fork and stabbed a slice of marinade-covered meat, holding it out for you to eat like a child.

“I can do that myself, thanks.” You took the fork and chewed slowly on the meat. It was good. More than good, really, so you took another bite and another. Soon, you were full, though there was more than half a plate left. You scooted the plate over to Minseok. “Okay, your turn.”

“You’re done? Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m stuffed.”

Minseok didn’t reach for the other fork he’d grabbed, as if giving you a chance to change your mind. When you made no such move, he dug in. You smiled at the way he ate, enjoying every bite with satisfaction. At the sight of every plate being empty, Baekhyun stood up. “I’m going to watch a movie,” he announced.

“Oh, that sounds like a good idea!” Jongin said.

Yixing asked, “Which one?”

Baekhyun shrugged. “I don’t know. Whatever’s new. (Y/n), want to join us?”

Minseok cut in. “I don’t know if that-”

“I’d love to!” You turned to Minseok and gave him a cheeky smile. It felt a bit defiant. Perhaps he wanted to explain more to you or spend time with you alone in general, but you wanted to know how this group operated together. You wanted insight to their normalcy. Getting to your feet, you picked up the plate, but Junmyeon reached over and took it from you.

“Don’t worry about this. We’ll clean up.”

“But-”

The alpha wouldn’t have it. “You’re the guest. Shoo.”

More than happy with that argument (dishes weren’t your thing by a long shot), you followed the cluster of excited men to the living room. They crashed on nearly every surface – the couch, the chairs, the floor, anywhere they could fit. Minseok approached Jongin and Sehun who had taken a corner of the long couch.

“Move,” he ordered.

“But we were here first!” Sehun whined. Jongin look over to you and then got up without a word, sitting down on the floor with his back against the coffee table.

“Sehun….”

“You’re really going to kick the youngest off the comfortable seat?”

You tried to break up the awkward exchange. Well, it was awkward for you since you were the reason for the discussion. “It’s fine, really. I can sit on the floor.”

“You’re not sitting on the floor,” Minseok told you. To Sehun, he said, “I’m the eldest and she’s a guest. Please move.”

For a second nothing happened. Then Sehun huffed. “Fine.” He got up and joined Jongin on the floor. He lied down on his stomach and pulled out his phone, over it already. You felt bad but saw no point in arguing. Minseok let you sit first and then, once again, sat between you and Chanyeol, who happily occupied the other side of the couch.

Baekhyun flipped through a streaming service until he landed on a superhero movie. Everyone cheered at the choice, then quieted down as he pressed play. Someone turned out the lights so only the glow of the television remained.

Sitting shoulder to shoulder and leg to leg, you were hyper aware of Minseok. Arms crossed over your stomach and fists clenched, you told yourself repeatedly not to reach for his hand or lean on his shoulder no matter how heavy your eyelids were getting. Erik may have hit pause on your relationship, but there wasn’t much of a discussion of lines. You didn’t know the rules of that scenario and what was and wasn’t allowed. But as your tiredness grew, your willpower weakened. After a few bobs, your head landed softly on Minseok’s shoulder. It was too comfortable to move. It felt too nice, too right. Like his shoulder was the one you were always supposed to lean on. And that was when Minseok made a move of his own.

Holding your head up, he adjusted his arm so it was now draped over your shoulders. Your head rested against his chest when he laid you back down. Something vibrated against your cheek. Was that… purring? No, it had to be the booming from the movie. Right?

It didn’t take long for you drift into sleep. The movie was one you’d seen before so you couldn’t use that as an excuse to stay awake. You weren’t sure how long it had been. A slight bopping motion roused you. In the shallowness of your conscious you made out that you were being carried. Carried up stairs… and into a bedroom. While still holding you, that person managed to pull back the covers and tuck you into bed. As the arm slipped away you grabbed hold of the wrist. Through the slightest slits in your eyes you could make out Minseok’s silhouette.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he whispered. “Go back to sleep. I’ll take the couch downstairs.”

“No. Stay.”

He froze at your request. “Are you sure?”

“Please.”

Even in the darkness, you could see him smiling. “Okay.” Shutting the door, he peeled back the covers once more and slid in beside you. Happy wasn’t even close to how you felt when he pulled you in close to his chest. You drifted back to sleep with a smile on your face.

#exo #exo wolf au #exo wolf!au #minseok x reader #kim minseok #xiumin #minseok #exo werewolf au #exo werewolf!au #exo supernatural au #exo series #exo fanfic #exo fanfiction #The Untamed Universe #Catching Rain

243 notes · View notes

niawritess · 4 years ago

Text

The Lovestruck~Chapter 7

(1st December)

9:33 am

"Waah! That was such a hard test." Ria groaned while stretching her body and you sighed whilst nodding.

"Prof. really gave questions from that chapter which I took notes from." You opened your notes to check your answers.

"Y/n, the test is over, so keep the notes back before I throw them out." Ria threatened and you gave her a look before shoving your notes aside.

"Let's go in the garden, you have brought chocolates, right? After taking the test, my sugar level has decreased and hunger has increased." Ria said dramatically dropping her body on you behind and you coughed before dragging her to the garden.

"Oh My God!" Ria laughed out loud causing people in the garden look at you both weirdly and you slapped her arm. "Shush, stop laughing now."

"Okay wait, so Dan almost revealed your story." She snickered before taking a bite of the chocolate.

"Dan seriously, I would kill him someday." You huffed munching your chocolate before you looked around and spotted a familiar figure.

You frowned. "Isn't that Rowoon?"

Ria followed your gaze and let out a sigh. "Woah! They are dating already."

"How can you tell?"

"Look at their hands Y/n, and see how he keeps his arm around his shoulder." She gave you a look which was saying 'why are you so dumb'.

"What! I have seen in dramas, they also do that when they flirt, you know." You debated.

"They don't kiss on the cheeks if they are flirting." She said as a matter of fact tone and you shrugged, not really interested in the topic.

"I feel bad for the guy who would date an idiot like you." She shook her head in disappointment while taking the last bite of her chocolate.

You shot your eyes at her before faking a smile. "You don't have to feel anything because I'm not interested in dating."

"Not interested in dating," She mimicked your tone. "Let's wait and watch."

She crumbled the chocolate wrapper and threw it on your face, you glared at her before taking the wrapper and threw it back at her face.

"Still, I wanna date." She whined.

"Oh, it's class time." You ignored her before standing up and made your way toward the campus.

"Wait for me! You're always ignoring me." She yelled catching up to you but you ran away while her chasing you again.

_________________

12:14 pm

Walking out of the classroom, you were on your way to the cafeteria before texting Ria and while strolling, Rowoon was passing by you and waved his hand to you. Before you could greet him back, lauren quickly dragged him out before sparing you a glance, or say glare.

"What the heck? No one's going to steal your boyfriend." You grumbled, rolling your eyes before walking fast to your destination.

"Oyii, bestfriend!" You got a headlock by your bestfriend making you yelp and you shot a glare at her before she let go of you.

"Woah! What happened? Why are you sending dagger from your brown eyes." She joked and you gave her a look before walking again leaving her behind.

"Okay, jokes aside, what happened?" She asked linking her arms around yours.

"Nothing, that lauren-"

"Lauren? What did she do? Huh? Did she said something to you? Wha-" She started her nonstop questions but halted when you gave her a look of 'will you let me talk'.

"Okay, i'll stop now tell me." She brought crossed arms to her chest and stared at you seriously.

You let out a exhasperated sigh. "That.. Actually Rowoon waved to me and she just dragged him like I was going to jump on him like seriously I'm not even interested in him that way lik-"

"What! How dare she!" Ria exploded putting her hands on her hips. "I knew it! She seemed to be rude with others but how dare she! With my best friend! Just wait i will teach her lesson!"

She rolled up her invisible sleeves and was about to go but you grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Woah! Calm down dragon! What are you doing? It's not even serious and I don't even care about her, so leave it." You said calmly.

"What?"

"Look, she just tried to tell me that Rowoon is her boyfriend, yeah it wasn't her mouth but eyes and I don't really care about whatever she thinks or do, unless she crosses her limit." You stated and she looked at you with frown but nodded.

"Then why were you angry?" She asked.

"It was for a brief minute but then I thought why should I care?" You told her casually and she pursed her lips.

"Right, you're someone who doesn't really care." She smiled and you nodded.

"Anything else?" You folded your arms to your chest.

"No professor, you're amazing." She gave you thumbs up and you both laughed.

"Let's go now, i'm ravenous." You whined, rubbing your stomach.

"I know, you eat-cracker."

"I told you not to call me that."

"What? What are you gonna do? Eat-cracker." She stuck out her tongue at you and you scoffed. "You're dead now!"

She ran ahead with you chasing her before Ria was running as she glanced behind to you and she didn't saw that there was someone walking ahead of her.

"Careful!" You shouted as you saw what was about to happen but too late she bumped into a guy's back.

"I'm sorry." She immediately uttered as she stood straight before he turned around and Ria let out a gasp seeing the person infront of her who was none other than Park Chanyeol.

You quickly jogged upto her and stood in front of the taller guy who was towering over you both.

"You!" He exclaimed looking at her Ria and shifted his eyes to you for a brief second before looking back at her.

"Aren't you that card girl?" He asked showing his big eyes.

"Yes, but I'm not card girl, I'm Ria." She smiled and he nodded smilingly, finally knowing her name while you just looked at both them weirdly until you heard another guy's voice behind you to see none other than Kim Jongin.

"Hyung! Here-." He halted his sentence as his eyes stopped to you both who were looking at him with wide eyes.

"Oh! You!" He exclaimed pointing at you causing you both get startle."You work at that Café, right? Baekhyunee hyung's g-"

Chanyeol cupped his mouth, before he could utter that girl word while You and Ria looked at eachother before looking back at them perplexed.

"Friend, he meant friend." Chanyeol completed his sentence, whilst smiling nervously and you nodded slowly.

"Something like that." You chuckled awkwardly not really sure about the answer.

"So, you go to our college." Jongin spoke, with a surprise tone and you just smiled before he glanced at Ria who was staring at him in shock.

"And you are?" He asked, his corner of lips twitching upward and you glanced at Ria who was still in shock to answer, so you nudged her and she snapped out.

"Uh.. Um yeah, I'm Ria Song Smith, Y/n's bestfriend." She stammered and smiled nervously.

He nodded smilingly before glancing back at you. "So, you're Y/n, we finally met you."

"Eh?" You tilted your head looking at him in confusion.

"Oh nothing, don't mind him." Chanyeol interuppted. "Anyway, we have to go out, so see you around." He smiled and you both nodded.

"Annyeong!" Jongin waved cutely, walking away with Chanyeol behind and he looked back at Ria who was also looking at him before he walked away.

"What was that?" You uttered and looked at your bestfriend who was still looking at the college gate where your seniors went out by.

"Ugh let's go now!" You groaned, dragging her to the cafeteria before her fangirling starts.

_______________

"I can't believe, I met them." Ria said, sitting on her chair.

"Like I met Chanyeol Sunbae once but didn't know I would get to meet them again with Jongin Sunbae of course and they talked to us." She squealed.

"Here she goes again." You muttered before rolling your eyes and sat beside her.

"I don't get it, why don't they eat in cafeteria like the food isn't bad tho." She said and you nodded.

"Maybe, they are fed up from the stares." You joked, shoving spoon of rice in your mouth.

She gasped. "That must be it! They are so handsome, of course people would stare at them."

You looked at her in disbelief. "No, I just.."

"What?"

"No, just eat up." You shook your head but then laughed at your bestfriend who took your joke seriously.

Ria looked at you and understood as you got smacked by her but instead of getting angry, you laughed even more.

"What's so funny?"

You both looked up hearing the familiar guy's voice as he sat opposite of you both and stopped laughing.

"Mark?" Ria looked at perplexed. "We didn't see you the whole day, where were you?"

"Actually, I was in need of a part-time job and found one so went there to discuss about it." He replied.

"Oh? You were looking for a part-time job? You could've just asked Y/n then, she works at a Café." Ria told him and he looked at you in surprised. "You do?"

You nodded. "Yeah, but why are you so surprised?"

"Correct me, if I'm wrong but your family is good financially right? Then why are you working there?" He questioned.

"Yeah, at first I wanted to work there for some experience but now I like working there." You smiled.

"Or is it someo-." Ria's sentence got interrupted as you shoved her spoon of rice.

"Eat a lot." You gritted your teeth and she grinned mischievously.

"What happened?" Mark looked at you both confusingly and you shook your head before glaring at your bestfriend who was munching her meal happily.

__________________

"Why did you both took forever?" Junmyeon asked the two males who just reached their table before getting seated.

"We met someone on the way." Jongin answered filling his plate with the meal while Chanyeol ignored him and sat beside Sehun.

"Who?" Yixing asked who was seated beside him.

"You won't believe, Baekhyunee hyung's girl." Jongin grinned causing Baekhyun stop his chopsticks in his mouth and he looked at the latter with widen eyes.

"What did you say? You met who?" He asked placing his chopsticks back on the table.

"I said I met your girl Hyung." He replied before gulping his water.

"Where did you meet her? And I told you it's not like that, so stop calling her that, she has a name." Baekhyun told him sternly.

"I know, it's Y/n." Jongin said casually smiling in victory and Baekhyun looked at him for few seconds before letting out a sigh. "I hope you didn't spout nonsense infront of her."

"Hyung! What do you take me for!" Jongin whined.

"He almost said she's your girl." Chanyeol intruded and Baekhyun looked at him in shock before looking back at jongin furiously.

"You-."

"Hyung! That was mouth slip, okay!" Jongin defended himself.

"Whatever, Don't talk nonsense to her, no don't even talk to her." He forbid him and jongin smirked.

"Why? You're going to get jealous?" He wriggled his eyes brows and Baekhyun rolled his eyes. "Shut up."

"Stop it and let us eat now." Kyungsoo grunted getting irritate by their conversation and two of them stopped but jongin kept grinning widely at his Hyung who was eyeing him sternly.

______________

2:14 pm

You were walking towards the Café as usual while listening to some music and getting close to Café, you were so imersed that you didn't felt that someone was walking beside you.

As you glanced to your side, you got startled to see Baekhyun in his simple yellow hoodie and jeans, smiling down at you.

You stopped and pulled out your earbuds, before looking at him astonished. "When did you come?"

"I have been walking beside you for like five minutes now, you didn't know?" He looked at in confusion and surprise.

You shook your head innocently and he imitated you shaking his head while looking at you in amaze.

"How could you get so imersed, that you didn't even felt me beside you." He asked and you just shrugged.

"You shouldn't do that, it's dangerous." He said staring at you in serious expression making you surprise as you've never seen him this serious before except that basketball game day.

Nevertheless, you smiled. "Okay, I'll be careful."

He grinned back."Good, let's go now."

He walked ahead while you stood there staring at his back and wondering.

"What is this? Why did he sounded like dad?" You mumbled then chuckled at your thought.

Baekhyun stopped when he didn't see you beside him and turned around to see you standing there.

"What happened? Come on." He called you out and you nodded before jogging upto him.

You both reached the café and as you were about to open the door, Baekhyun did it gesturing you to go in first as you looked at him and smiled before walking in with Baekhyun behind you.

"Oh? You two came together." Rose said as soon as you both entered.

"We met on the way." Baekhyun told her, making his way to the kitchen and she nodded.

"Rose, did you set the date?" You asked as you approached her at the counter and Baekhyun came out of the kitchen wearing his apron.

"Jack said, they need to recheck the schedule and will inform later." She told and you nodded.

"You talk to jack often?" You frowned and she looked at you but didn't answered.

"Of course, she has to ask him about these things right, Rose?" Baekhyun looked at Rose who looked at you both in perplex and nodded slowly.

You tilted your head. "But Rose, why is your face so red?"

"Oh? Is it?" She laughed looking away nervously and fanning her face. "I just feel hot."

"It's winter." You said, looking at her innocently and trying not to laugh.

"Uh..yeah, it is winter." She stuttered and looked at you who was stifling her laugh and immediately squinted her eyes at you.

"Go get changed and get to work." She pushed you playfully towards the kitchen and you laughed before walking in the kitchen.

You walked out of the kitchen wearing your apron, before walking behind the counter and stood beside Baekhyun who was taking the order.

You started making the drink while watching Rose who was talking on the phone and then you felt a presence beside you.

"Why were you teasing her?" Baekhyun asked but his tone was a complaining one, like a protective brother who was worried for his big sister.

You giggled at your thought before handing him the drink and he gave it to the customer with smile before standing beside of you again.

"The thing is, Rose is the only child and has always kept herself busy with studies and then this Café, so she never had time to date and now finally she's on that track then there's no one to tease her." You explained.

"So, I want to let her feel that how sisters are by teasing her a little bit, if it does make sense to you?" You chuckled and he nodded slowly understanding your point.

"That's good but then you also have to be prepared." He uttered before taking the order from another customer who just came in.

"Why?" You frowned.

"I'm not-" You got interrupted as your hand hit the spoon on the counter causing it to fall and it made a loud sound which startled the customers including you both.

You immediately apologized before squatting down and Baekhyun did the same making your forehead collide with his.

"Ow." You both groaned rubbing your forehead before looking at each other for few seconds and burst out giggling.

"Wait." You hit your forehead with his again lightly and he looked at you in confusion while rubbing it.

"Oh, if you don't hit it again, two horns will grow on your head." You told gesturing towards his head and he looked at you weirdly.

"Who told you that?"

"I saw it in dramas."

He looked at you in disbelief before sighing in defeat and shook his head.

"You and your dramas..," He trailed off as his corner of lips turned upward. "..Are really one of a kind."

With that he stood up before holding out his hand to you and you looked at him frowning before picking up the spoon and took his hand to stand up but got startled to see the customer looking at you both in shock.

"Am I interrupting something?" He eyed you both weirdly and Baekhyun's eyes widen while you were still confused.

You looked at Baekhyun, then to the customer who was still staring at you weirdly and then you realized what he meant which made your eyes enlarged and your face flushed.

"No! It's not like that!" You exclaimed a little loudly startling him and he nodded scared by your sudden outburst.

"Sorry, can you get my order, please?" He looked at Baekhyun and he nodded before doing it while you took the drink to serve a customer by walking away quickly with your red cheeks.

Baekhyun chuckled at your reaction which he found cute and kept smiling while making the drink.

"Is she your girlfriend?" The customer asked him noticing his smile and Baekhyun got surprised by the question.

He shook his head. "No, we're.." he stopped getting confused by his question and thinking what are you both, co-workers? acquaintances?

Then his eyes stopped at you who was talking to Rose smilingly and his lips curved into a smile as looked at the customer.

"Friends, we're friends." He told him before giving his drink to him and the customer nodded.

"I thought you were a couple." He chuckled awkwardly before taking his drink from him and walked out leaving Baekhyun in amaze.

"What did the customer said? I saw you two talking." You questioned as you reached the counter.

"He said, you watch too many times." Baekhyun replied, looking at you seriously and you frowned.

"Hm? How does he know I watch dramas?"

He looked at you for few seconds and then laughed shaking his head. "I'm kidding."

"Huh? What the heck?" You whined making him laugh more and you made a face before walking towards the kitchen leaving laughing Baekhyun behind but his laugh made you smile unknowingly.

***

7:51 pm

You entered your home with Daniel behind you before he walked into the kitchen and you sat on the couch while closing your eyes.

You felt peaceful until something cold touched your cheek making you flinch and immediately opened your eyes to see Daniel grinning down at you while holding a juice bottle.

"What the.." You took it from him and he sat beside you before you opened the bottle cap and took a sip.

"Oh right, mom called but you weren't home." Daniel sipped his juice and you sat up straight before bringing your legs up and crossed them.

"How are they? They are coming back tomorrow right?"

"They have to stay for another week."

"Another week? Why? Is everything okay there?" You asked worringly.

He nodded. "Everything is alright, their flight got canceled because of weather and the whole week is booked already."

You nodded pouting. "So I have to tolerate you for another week."

"That's what I'm saying." You shot back and you glared at him before switching on the TV.

You gasped. "Oh, it's Park Seo Joon!"

"Are you a player? You keep changing your actors." Daniel grunted and you scoffed. "It's not being a player, it's called being fan of them."

"Whatever, now give me the remote, I wanna watch." He was about to grab the remote but you pulled your hand behind you.

"No, I'm going to watch my drama."

"Just give me the remote!"

"No!"

"Okay!"

"Okay?" You looked at him in surprise before placing your palm oh his forehead. "Are you sick or something?"

"Shut up! Noona, i'm bored. Let's go out." He requested giving you pleading eyes.

"I don't want to."

"You're always at home, just get out sometimes. Let's goooo!" He whined, shaking your arms and you exhasperated before looking back at him.

"Ugh! Fine."

"Yayy!" He exclaimed and you shook your head before smiling at your brother who looked like a 5 year sold.

_____________

@wooya1224 @buttercupbbh

#bbh #exo fanfiction #exo ff #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun gifs #baekhyun imagines #baekhyun #baekhyun x reader

18 notes · View notes

oohfluffy · 5 years ago

Text

DDND Ch.10 | KJI

Group: EXO

Member: Kim Jongin

Theme: Fluff | Dancer!AU | Dormmmate!AU

Word Count: 2,219

❀ Chapter 10: The Other Side ❀

You put your hands in your pockets as you glance at the boy walking in front of you.

You've decided to take this talk outside of the dorm and just walk around the area.

But you didn't know it would be this cold outside.

Okay, maybe you did but you forgot.

You bit your lip for a couple of times, trying to make it more pinkish 'cause you felt like it's turning paler as time passes by.

"So?" You trailed off, trying to make Kai talk first.

You were really so curious about what Kai wants to talk about and why he looked so broken when he held your hand earlier.

Did I do something bad to him? Why is he like this? Did something happen? Why would it concern—

Your thoughts were cut off when you suddenly bumped onto Kai's back.

"Oh shoot." You mumbled, backing away from him. "Sorry."

"I-It's fine. Can we just sit here and talk?"

You looked around and figured that you stopped in front of a bench near the playground. You immediately sat down, feeling tired after all the walking even though you're already used in walking around your area because of Hunnie, your dog. (remember the dog?)

"Okay, so what do we—"

"I'm sorry."

You turned to look at him but his hands rushed to stop you, gently placing your head on his neck.

"Let's talk like this, okay? I can't have you staring at me as I talk."

You gapped at your position right now. You must look like a couple in other people's eyes.

Omo. Can we really talk like this? If he can, I don't know if I can.

"You must be shocked, right?"

I'm sure I'm more shocked with this position than you asking me to have a talk with you.

"W-What is it that you want to talk about?" You stuttered, leaning back on his shoulder.

Hey, I'm just trying to be comfortable, okay?

You felt Kai chuckle lightly but made his hand wrap around your shoulder instead, attempting to make you more comfortable. You were hesitant as you moved your head on his neck, closing your eyes as you did.

"Are you comfortable with this?"

It feels like a deja vu.

You nodded, sighing in contentment.

"Just say what you want to say before I fall asleep here." You mumbled.

"Okay then. Let me start."

You mentally braced yourself for whatever he has to say. You suddenly felt nervous. You didn't know what's the issue between the two of you. You have no clue what will be the topic for this talk.

But as Kai's warm hand caressed your arm slightly, you felt a little calm.

"I met your father."

Your eyes opened immediately opened at the mention of your father. Kai really dropped a bomb in a second.

"Okay, calm down. Please hear me out before you freak out." Kai calmed you down, nuzzling his chin on the top of your head.

Shit. I don't know what to feel right now.

"What your aunt told you about me going back to my brother's house was true. My brother is Kim Soohyun." Kai sighed before continuing.

"I'm actually kicked out of the family."

"What? Kicked out? How?" You whispered.

"What kind of parents would want their child to be a dancer, right?"

You felt hurt as you heard the pain and sadness in Kai's voice. He looks so strong and very playful on the outside but if you can see him right now, he's like a broken glass, still finding the missing pieces of his figure.

"My father's name was at risk. I didn't know being a dancer can break our family that easily. My brother kept it from them when he knew what I wanted to be, that's why he too was kicked out but of course, as the oldest, he can't actually leave our family. After all, my father favored him more."

You felt familiar with the story Kai is sharing with you.

We're somehow the same.

"My mom is fine with me wanting to become a dancer. She accepted me for what I want to be. She even fought with my father because of it. But..."

You can feel how Kai breathes in and out. You don't know how hard it is for him to share the story of his life. But you admit that you're happy he's opening up to you.

"She can't leave my father for me. I mean, who would choose a young dancer-wanna-be from a successful businessman? I know my mother would be a lot happier with him than live with me. I'm barely even on their level. I can't even afford to live in my own house. That's why.."

Kai looked down at you and saw you with your eyes closed. He smiled.

"That's why I chose to live in a dorm. Luckily, I met someone on the way. And I'm satisfied with that."

You flinched as you felt his breath hit your face, not because of the attractive minty smell but you can just imagine how close he is to you.

You cleared your throat.

"S-So, how did you meet my father then? What's the connection?"

"My brother is the heir of dad's business. Last month, he asked me if I can accompany him in meeting a very important person. I didn't know that person was Chinese. I just thought he was one of the biggest investors in father's company. But he was also one of father's close friends."

Kai's voice is lulling you to sleep but you kept your eyes open and of course, your ears too.

"I didn't know Mr. Zhang Lei was your father."

You slowly closed your eyes, trying to keep the rebelling tears from falling.

"I wouldn't know if my brother didn't give me a few of information about him though."

Memories started flashing back in your mind.

"You killed your mother!"

"If only you didn't force your mother to drive that rainy night, she would not have died!"

"You useless daughter!"

"Your first-born daughter is unable to pass this test."

"She is not suitable for my path. I do not need anyone in my family that can't handle this business."

"Get out of this house!"

A tear escaped from your eye, betraying your will to stop it from falling.

"I-I'm sorry." Kai whispered as if his words will hurt you more.

You just hid your face from his sight, tightly wrapping your arms on his torso and snuggling more on his neck.

Kai seemed fazed by your actions but wrapped his arms around you too. He knew you need comfort, not only right now but also every time you think of it.

He knew about how your father hurt you, maybe not physically but mentally. He also knew how your father turned his back on you after blaming your mother's death on you. He knew how you were abandoned in such a young age of 13, giving you away to your most distant aunt. He knew how hard it was for you, until now, since he, himself, is experiencing it.

But Kai knows it was harder for you.

Kai has his older brother, his best friend Sehun, his friends and co-dancers in DanWiMu and other connections in different places.

He started in an easier pace because of others' help.

But you didn't have anyone.

You started everything alone.

You have your aunt and 3 friends plus Sehun now. Maybe they were enough for you to fight for everyday. But it's still hard living that kind of life.

Alone working for your future starting at the age of 13.

Yes, your aunt helped you but she has limits too. Your aunt isn't that rich like your father but she helps you in every way she can.

Kai's heart aches as he thought about how did you manage going through every painful and tiresome days.

You deserve so much more than heartaches.

"Y-you..." You sniffed. "...know everything about me?"

Kai was silent for a moment.

"I think I know enough already."

You calmed yourself down for a few minutes with deep breaths and Kai's comforting arms.

"Did he know you know me?"

You kept your eyes closed as you stayed on his neck.

"He knew where you are, of course he knew who you were living with. I figured you're father must be looking out for you—"

"Looking out, my ass." You snapped, finally had the strength to pull yourself out of his grasp.

"Look, Jongin. I don't really hate my father, okay? Let me make this clear." You look into Kai's eyes. "I don't hate him but I-I just can't forget how he hurt me with his words. Yeah he was hurt because of mom's death but that doesn't mean I wasn't hurt. In fact, I'm still hurting."

"He didn't think about my feelings. He only thought about his." You stood up, feeling a little lighter from finally expressing your feelings by words and not by hitting your pillows.

"And since I'm such a useless daughter who can't do business like him, I deserved to be kicked out of his golden house." You sarcastically added as you started walking back to your dorm.

You heard Kai's footsteps behind you.

"Your dad.." You heard Kai said.

"He was a funny guy. A serious but a funny man. He knows when to focus and be serious but knows how to lighten up the mood instantly. I think that's why my father likes him." Kai continued, matching his walking pace with you.

"Yeah, he is." You mumbled, looking up at the dark sky.

There are stars staring back at you, some are bright, some are dull but they all shine in your eyes. You wonder if Taeyong is still up, stargazing at this moment like how you both used to do when you were younger.

You miss home.

"Thank you, Kai."

Kai looked at you in surprise.

"Thank you for telling me your story and comforting me earlier. I needed that." You said with a smile, still not looking at him even though you can feel his gaze on you.

"I knew we're soulmates."

You playfully glared at him and Kai just laughed it off.

"I think we'll be good friends from now on?" You said with an eyebrow up.

Kai grinned.

"Of course."

You knew he didn't know everything about what really happened. He must have heard the other side of the story but not yours.

You're still not ready to tell him that.

But you feel like he'll really uncover every part of your life.

♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫ ❧ ♫

"You look blooming today, bud. What's up?"

You just smiled at Joohyuk and continued working.

"Yah! I feel like I haven't seen you for several months because of your sudden change. Are you hiding something from your best friend?" Joohyuk said, nudging your shoulder, barely doing it since he's much taller than you.

"Can't someone be just happy without a particular reason?" You argued.

"Maybe someone but not you. You're being weird. Last week you looked like a zombie, now you look like you've fully risen from the dead."

You just rolled your eyes and ignored him.

"Let the girl be happy, Hyuk. Just cheer her on, okay?" Tiffany said, smiling at you. You smiled in return.

"Cheer her on what?" Joohyuk said in a rush, looking at you.

"Aish. Our little bunny here is blooming because her dancer is back." Tiffany cooed. Joohyuk's eyebrows shot up as he glared in front of him.

"You look so ugly. Please stop that." You told Joohyuk, slightly hitting the back of his head as you walked passed him.

Joohyuk slowly glanced at your happy face.

A small smile forming on his lips.

"I'm glad she's finally happy." Joohyuk whispered to himself as he stared at your back.

Tiffany moved closer to you as you reached for the towels up on the cabinet.

"But seriously, nothing happened on your date with my brother?" Tiffany asked again for the nth time. You turned to her with a bored expression.

"Unnie, how many times do I have to tell you? Sehun and I are just friends, okay? Nothing more. Please keep that in your mind. I know you're a very forgetful person but that's not really hard to remember, right? Okay then, I'll go back to work."

You tiptoed and got the towels you needed.

"So, my brother and you won't ever happen? Like never?"

You laughed.

"Why do you want me to date your brother so much?" You asked curiously while neatly folding the towels in your arms.

"He seems to like you and that's a first for him. I don't really see Sehun around girls that much. He has fangirls but that's it. And you're the best girl I can ever think of for him." Tiffany said as if trying to convince you to date Sehun.

You shook your head with a smile before turning to Tiffany.

"I've told you who I really like, right?" You whispered.

Tiffany nodded with a huff.

"It will be always him until I say I don't like him already." You added.

Tiffany smiled.

I won't deny it. I like Kai more than I thought.

—

❀ Ch.11

11 notes · View notes