#the fact that (if i get it) i’ll get to do that and ALSO keep my current job is the fucking BEST

[jane-asmo]

Why I think Caitlyn didn’t ask Vi for forgiveness

(Thank 'anons' for your messages. I’ll try to respond to you through this text: )

The importance of Caitlyn’s “I know”

A key moment in Caitlyn’s character narrative is her “I know”—both its content and delivery.

The content: When Caitlyn says, “I know,” it doesn’t just mean “You’re right.” It means, “I’ve taken the time to think about this.” And thinking is what Caitlyn does best. Her “I know” conveys that she has already had this conversation with herself, over and over in her head. She’s thought about it constantly, she’s already told herself these things, and she’s already blamed herself for them.

The delivery: She screams it with violence, and we can see this represented by the boat falling apart. It’s not just that she has thought about it; it’s tormenting her. Her “I know” is incredibly powerful because it’s filled with suffering.

To me, this is as valid as an apology because asking for forgiveness is outward-facing—focused on the other person. "Asking for forgiveness" says, “Whether I’ve forgiven myself or not, whether I feel guilty or not, it’s on you to decide to forgive me.”

But here, Caitlyn’s “I know” is inward-facing. It means, “I’m not asking you to forgive me because I can’t even forgive myself.”

She knows everything you’re saying, and it torments her.

This is followed by:

"I didn’t even have time to think before they hauled her off."

This line is so telling. Everything about Caitlyn is tied to thinking and reflection.

Being a sniper means aiming and shooting. Aiming is the equivalent of thinking, and shooting is the equivalent of speaking. Everything Caitlyn does is deliberate and thought through.

This is why some people dislike her: as I’ve said before, unlike other characters, Caitlyn’s actions can’t be forgiven easily because she doesn’t do anything by accident.

Then we get to:

"We can’t erase our mistakes. None of us."

Caitlyn speak in “we.”

In the prison scene with Jinx:

"No amount of good deeds can undo our crimes."

This scene mirrors the rage she felt when she threw the boat. In this moment, she’s speaking to Jinx, but also to herself.

Caitlyn and Jinx are paralleled so many times throughout the show. Caitlyn quickly realized that, in some ways, she had become like Jinx. And so, in order to forgive Jinx, she would first have to forgive herself.

At this point in the episode, the person Caitlyn hates the most is herself.

But she no longer has the "energy" to hate, neither Jinx nor herself.

Energy comes from fuel. What she perceives as a lack of strength to keep fighting is simply the fact that the fuel that powered her hatred has disappeared. And when you stop feeding a fire, it eventually dies out. She has no energy left; she has no fuel to sustain her hatred.

It's a particular way of saying, I don’t hate you anymore, and I don’t want to hate myself anymore either, because in the end, that hatred corrupts us/everything .

In her own unique way, Jinx also says, I didn’t know your mother was there, even if it wouldn’t have changed anything. And this too is a strange way of taking a step toward the other.

We have two brilliant and intelligent women who express their emotions in unconventional ways. ----------

There’s also a whole analysis that could be done about her concept of justice and rules, "but I don’t have the energy" to dive into that here. Still, it would only lead back to the fact that Caitlyn doesn’t see herself as the right person to free Jinx (and therefore to forgive her) because she believes she herself is beyond forgiveness.

[makismei]

thinking about toji with a sensitive girl who runs away before she cums, saying it’s too much and she can’t take it! cw: hints of sadism & machoism, unintentional edging, squirting, he’s pretty sweet ^.^

“baby, c’mon, you’re making this harder for yourself.” he chides, dragging your twitchy hips back. your thighs stay shut and he sends you a pointed glare, “what’s this?”

“toji,” you sniffle, “s’ too much, i can’t do it.”

with your teary eyes and quivering legs, toji can’t help but be mean. you’re so cute. it might be the death of him.

“want to use your special little word?” he asks lowly, already knowing your answer.

you shrink in on yourself, “n-no…”

he hums, a sick grin tugging on his lips. “i’m gonna need something more convincing than that, baby.”

you pout. he’s teasing you. he likes to see you like this.

shyly, you open your thighs, revealing your soaked cunt to him. his eyes lock in on your needy hole, twitching and drooling all over the bedsheets. “please, toji, make me cum..”

“aw, how sweet. saying please too, how can i say no?” he mutters, thick hand caressing your thigh, trailing closer to where you need him.

“you’re not gonna run this time, right?” he pats your pussy, entertained by the way you tense and how you force your legs to stay open.

“m’ not!” he knows you’re lying. but it’s fine, he likes testing how far you can go.

he thumbs your clit, watching you intently. you’re staring down at his hand, anticipating his next move. slowly, he pushes two fingers inside, groaning to himself when you squeeze down on his digits, “what a slutty cunt,” he grouses, “see doll, she’s begging to cum, but you’re not letting her.”

toji prods around, still thumbing your clit and you think you’re going to cry.

“hold your legs back,” he doesn’t even bother looking at you, “your legs are trying to close on me.”

you know what’s gonna happen if you hold your legs back. but also, what happens if you don’t. you shake your head, defiant. “i don’t wanna…”

the man hums, amused. “you’re gonna be like that?” you nod, testing him.

“hmm, i think m’ done being nice to you.” your pupils morphing into hearts at his words, barely even realizing that he’s putting a hand on your thigh, pushing it down to make room for him. he locks your other leg underneath him.

his fingers know exactly where to poke, thumb still on your clit. he’s so precise, aiming for that one spot again and again.

naturally, because he’s already tried to make you cum a few times, it doesn’t take long for you to know you’re gonna cum.

“don’t.” he scolds, already knowing what you’re up to, “don’t hold it, cum.”

it’s overwhelming, you’re not sure if you’re holding it intentionally, but you like it when he forces you to cum anyway. “i c-can’t, toji, toji no!”

you’re trying to squirm away. away from the onslaught of pleasure. toji glares at you and then you hear it.

a soft buzz and you look down, mortified. he’s still fingering you, despite the fact you’re clenching down so hard he can barely move his fingers.

“wait.. wait toji, baby, please,” you beg, “i’ll cum, i’ll cum now. but plea—easeeee!”

“i’ve given you enough chances,” he frowns, pressing the little toy against your clit, he continues driving his digits into you. “c’mon baby, make me happy.”

you’re sobbing hysterically, unable to get away from the pleasure. toji laughs, “let go, i dunno why you’re doing this to yourself.”

writhing on the bed is useless because you can’t escape his hold—teetering on the edge of orgasm is making your mind go numb.

“n-no, m’ gonna cum, toji i can’t hold it! it’s gonna come ouuuttt!” he doesn’t let up, shaking the toy and watching your back arch up.

“hands.” he scolds and you immediately withdraw your clammy fingers from his own, “that’s good, now c’mon, you know what i want.”

it’s paralyzing, left leg shaking uncontrollably underneath him while you babble incoherently. he keeps a watchful eye, working you to it. he feels his cock drooling pre at the sight of you—the feeling of you falling apart on his fingers is making his mind hazy.

your vision whites. toji whistles lowly, watching you splash liquid all over his lower tummy, soaking his boxers. he tosses the vibrator aside, thick fingers gently working you through it.

you’re practically screeching, becoming so fidgety that toji has to use his free hand to scoop up your wrists, keeping you at his mercy.

“shh, baby, that’s good. that feels good, don’t it?” when your body relaxes, he pops his fingers out, shamelessly putting them in his mouth. he leans over you, pressing his weight onto you.

burly hands hold your face, grinning at your bleary eyes and tear soaked cheeks. “hey, gorgeous,” he hums sweetly, pressing a wet kiss to your cheek. you’re panting, trying to catch your breath and he doesn’t want to overwhelm you, but it’s in his nature to be a little mean.

pressing his tongue into your open mouth, you moan, unable to keep up and he breathes out a laugh, pulling away. he knocks his nose against yours, praising you quietly.

weak arms throw themselves over his neck, keeping him close to you. you can feel his bulge twitch, a familiar warmth beginning spread over your body.

“tojiii~” you tease, “i think your little friend wants some attention too.”

he’s amused, grinning wolfishly. “haven’t you had enough, lady?”

you pretend to ponder, “i can’t say for sure.”

“you started this,” he pulls away, manhandling your body so you’re on your knees, face smushed into the pillow, “i think you’re biting off more than you can chew, doll.”

[sherewrytes]

Plug Kento Nanami

Plug Nanami: Who shows up on time, every time, dressed like he’s on his way to a party or club instead of making a drop-off, with perfectly rolled joints and not a single hair out of place.

Plug Nanami: Who never raises his voice but somehow manages to make you feel like you owe him more than just payment with that low, smooth tone of his.

Plug Nanami: Who refuses to let you short yourself, sliding a little extra into your bag with a soft, "Consider it a bonus for being such a loyal customer."

Plug Nanami: Who texts you after every transaction with, "Everything to your satisfaction?" like he’s taking customer service to a whole new level.

Plug Nanami: Who only ever stays for a quick chat, but the way he adjusts his glasses and lets his eyes linger on you a moment too long makes your heart race.

Plug Nanami: Who once showed up in the middle of a rainstorm, soaking wet but completely unbothered, handing over your pre-rolls with a deadpan, "You’re lucky I prioritize good clients."

Plug Nanami: Who has this effortless dominance about him, the kind that makes you want to do things just to see him smirk in approval.

Plug Nanami: Who caught you once in your oversized sweats and bonnet and still said, "You look good," like it was a fact, not a compliment.

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t miss a beat when you flirt with him, offering a small chuckle before responding, "Careful now. I don’t mix business with pleasure… unless you’re willing to change my mind."

Plug Nanami: Who makes it very clear he’s not just your plug but also someone who notices everything, including when you’re stressed or looking run-down. "You need to take care of yourself," he says softly, slipping your favorite chocolate bar into your hand without a word.

Plug Nanami: Who’s always clean-cut, rocking a crisp white tee or a fitted hoodie, gold chain resting against his chest, looking more like a businessman than someone pushing product—but you know better.

Plug Nanami: Who runs his drops like clockwork, his Hellcat pulling up smooth and quiet. He leans out the window with a calm, "You good? Don’t keep me waiting too long."

Plug Nanami: Who surprises you with how he speaks—smooth, deliberate, but with just enough edge to make you sit up and pay attention. "You know I don’t do half measures, ma. You get the best from me, every time."

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just drop off the bag—he stays a little longer, leaning against the doorframe with a calm confidence, arms crossed, giving you a look that says he knows exactly what’s on your mind.

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t deal with nonsense, shutting down any funny business with a sharp, "Don’t play with my time." But with you? He’s always patient, his voice softening when he says, "Take your time. I’m in no rush."

Plug Nanami: Who tells you he doesn’t do freebies but somehow always slides you a little extra. "Just quality control," he smirks, though you know he’s lying.

Plug Nanami: Who keeps his stash on lock, never running out of the best strains, and every time you ask where he gets it, he just chuckles and says, "That’s my secret."

Plug Nanami: Who caught you once buying from someone else and didn’t say a word until his next drop-off. "Whatever they gave you? Trash. Stick with me, and I’ll make sure you’re never disappointed again."

Plug Nanami: Who shows up in his car, windows cracked, bass low, smelling like clean cologne and a faint hint of weed. He smirks when he catches you looking. "You like the vibe, huh? I can give you more than just this."

Plug Nanami: Who noticed you peeking at his tattoos one time and rolled up his sleeve just enough to show them off. "Curious, huh? Maybe one day I’ll let you trace them yourself."

Plug Nanami: Who, when you try to flirt too hard, chuckles low and deep, leaning closer to whisper, "You know you’re trouble, right? Keep talking like that, and I might start making house calls for more than just business."

Plug Nanami: Who, when you ask why he pushes product when he clearly doesn’t need to, just shrugs and says, "Sometimes the best things come from unexpected places," before giving you that look that leaves you questioning who’s really in control.

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t react when you tease him about being too refined for this game. Instead, he steps closer, his voice dropping. "Don’t let my look fool you, baby. I know exactly what I’m doing—and I know you love it."

Plug Nanami: Who caught you at a party once, surrounded by people you didn’t know, looking out of place. He walked right up to you, slid his arm around your waist, and whispered, "You good? Or you need me to remind you where you belong?"

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t hesitate to pull you aside when someone else tries to step to you, his tone cool but firm. "She’s with me. Don’t make me repeat myself."

Plug Nanami: Who, when you’re standing at the door in nothing but booty shorts and a cropped hoodie, doesn’t even try to hide the way his eyes sweep over you, his voice steady but rough. "You knew I was coming, and this is how you answer the door? You trying to start something, Y/N?"

Plug Nanami: Who stays calm when you playfully call him "Mr. Businessman," but steps closer, his broad shoulders towering over you as he murmurs, "Keep testing me, and I’ll show you just how serious I can be."

Plug Nanami: Who has this habit of brushing his fingers against yours when handing over your bag, just to see you react. And when you hesitate, he smirks. "What? You shy now? You weren’t shy last week when you were talking crazy to me."

Plug Nanami: Who, when you ask for recommendations, takes his time explaining the strains, his voice low and intimate like he’s telling you secrets no one else gets to hear. "This one’s for relaxing. But this one? This will have you feeling nice and warm. Could even help you sleep... if you’re alone."

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t hide his jealousy when he spots you dancing with some random dude at the club again. He doesn’t make a scene—he doesn’t have to. One hard look from across the room, and he has you second-guessing every move.

Plug Nanami: Who waits for you by the bar, calm but commanding, sipping his drink like he owns the place. When you finally approach him, he leans in close, his breath warm against your ear. "Was that supposed to make me jealous? 'Cause all it did was remind me who you’re really coming home to."

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just say things to say them—when he tells you, "You’re mine," he says it with a quiet intensity that makes your heart race, his hand resting lightly on your waist like a promise.

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t let you forget who’s in control. When you try to test him, he tilts his head, studying you with those sharp eyes before muttering, "Careful, Y/N. You don’t want to see what happens when I lose my patience."

Plug Nanami: Who, when he finally breaks that calm exterior, has you pinned against the couch, his hands firm on your thighs. His voice drops an octave as he says, "You think you can tease me and get away with it? Let me show you how wrong you are."

Plug Nanami: Who has you breathless by the time he’s done with you, his lips grazing your ear as he whispers, "Next time, don’t make me wait. You know I’m not good at sharing."

Plug Nanami: Who, even after all that, stays to clean up and roll another joint for you, his demeanor back to calm and collected as if nothing happened. He hands it to you with a small smirk. "Don’t say I never take care of you, ma."

Plug Nanami: Who always makes you feel special, even in the smallest ways—like when he leaves your place, pressing a kiss to your forehead before saying, "Stay out of trouble. I’ll be back when you need me."

Plug Nanami: Who, despite his smooth and professional vibe, lets his street-smart edge show when it matters. Like when he rolls up late at night after you text him about some dude getting too friendly at the bar. He leans against his car, arms crossed, his tone deadly calm. "You good? Or you need me to handle something?"

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t flinch when you ask why he’s so quiet during his drops. Instead, he gives you a slow, knowing smirk. "Why talk when I can let my actions speak for me? You like what I bring, don’t you?"

Plug Nanami: Who, after spotting you dancing with another guy at the club when your out with your friends one night, waits for you outside like he’s completely unbothered. But the second you walk up to him; his voice is sharp. "Next time you feel like playing games, make sure I’m the one who gets to win."

Plug Nanami: Who, when you tease him for his clean-cut image, throws it right back. "Don’t get it twisted, Y/N. Just because I dress like this doesn’t mean I can’t get dirty when I need to."

Plug Nanami: Who finally snaps one night after you keep pushing his buttons, pinning you against the wall, his lips grazing your ear as he growls, "You like testing me, huh? Let me show you why that’s a bad idea."

Plug Nanami: Who keeps his car spotless, but when you ride with him, lets you kick off your shoes and play your music, saying, "Don’t get used to this. You’re lucky I like you."

Plug Nanami: Who always gives you the best quality, but one night, he surprises you with a strain he says is "special order." When you ask why he’s letting you try it first, he shrugs casually. "Because I know you appreciate the finer things. Just like me."

Plug Nanami: Who never loses his cool but lets his territorial side show in subtle ways. Like the way he casually slips his arm around your waist when you’re out, his grip firm enough to make anyone watching back off.

Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just drop off weed—he becomes the only person you trust with your stash because everything he does is handled with precision. "You’re too good for anything less than perfect, Y/N," he says, his eyes locking onto yours in a way that makes you forget to breathe.

Plug Nanami: Who stays just long enough to remind you why he’s different. He doesn’t just pass the bag; he holds your gaze and leans in close, his voice low and deliberate. "Anything else you need tonight? You know I got you."

Plug Nanami: Who, after you’ve pushed him to his limit, leaves you breathless and spent, only to calmly adjust his hoodie and smirk down at you. "See? Told you not to test me."

Plug Nanami: Who, as he’s leaving, tosses a wrapped pre-roll on your table with a smirk. "That one’s on me. Thought you might need it after… all that.I'll be back later. I got another drop off"

[soggyriceee]

stress reliever pt2 - captain price

cw: lowkey aggressive price ngl y’all.. forced breeding, bathroom sex and lowkey:.. for like two seconds istg r@pe

“so, will you be taking me up on drinks tonight rookie?” Gaz smiled, holding the door to the armory open as you both brought back magazines for the new machine guns.

“you never stop trying do you?” you chuckled, shaking your head as the heat crept upon your cheeks.

it had been a full week today since you and Price had that little. moment. things have been weird and while he did ignore you for half the week, he’s been trying to apologize and be around you. however you don’t even let him get close, going so far as to ignore when he talk to you during drills or mission assignments.

everyone’s kinda picked up on it. you told them it was something stupid he said and you were just being petty. you knew that was wrong, but hearing you say that gave the captain hope that you’d talk to him soon.

but he’s noticed youve actually completely blocked him out your life, almost at if he were invisible! flirting with Gaz in the trucks, requesting him as a partner for almost everything. he was truly fed up and had no intent on letting this go any further.

“i do not. so. i’ll see you at Danny’s bar tonight at 8:30.” he said, grabbing the other box in your arms before pushing his way to the front of the crowded room, placing the boxes at the front table. Price noticed how you two walked in together, and late.

“3 minuets late. something happen that took up 3 minuets of our time soldiers?” his voice boomed, as you shuffled through the tall men to take your place in the front. “uh no sir just-“ “gaz was asking her out! look at his face it says it all over.” one of the recruits blurted out, causing an eruption of laughter throughout the room. all except one person of course.

price’s eyes met your cold ones, before you rolled them and shifted your way back out the door. “take 10. i better see guns in everyone’s hands fully loaded once i get back, Gaz.” he spat, slamming his clip board on the desk.

you were already well into the women’s restroom, sitting on the sink as you waited out the meeting. or so you thought.

within a minuet price was busting through the door, nose flared and eyes low. “price you sick fuck get out this is the women’s bathroom!” you exclaimed, jumping at the burly man’s sudden entrance.

“i’m yourw goddam captain have you forgotten that?” “yea and you’re also a fucking dick so now what?” you scoffed, almost laughing at his anger.

you felt no remorse of course, he literally ghosted you for a week. “now if we’re done here can you get out? id like to pee now.”

price didn’t like that.

with swiftness, both your hands were pinned to the sink behind you, Price’s body pushed right against yours. “you think you’re funny? think you’re tough shit hm?” he asked, his voice low, grip on yours wrists tight.

price was more than angry with you. of course he was wrong for how he ignored you. but he’s here now he’s trying to fix it. and you’re going on dates with other guys? it made him wonder..

“you’re going on dates either our baby inside you? hm?” to which he got a chuckle from you. “you ignored me, completely, and expected me to keep it? to not take a pill?” another laugh.

for a moment, he felt like his heart stopped and literally dropped. i mean you weren’t wrong for what you did, but the fact you still did it shook him a bit to his core. but that quickly became anger.

his grip on your wrist became almost enough to snap it in half, earning a yelp from you. he yanked you, turning you so your face was smooshed against the bathroom mirror. one hand wrapped around your waist, undoing your pants and yanking them down. no panties.

“Price get the fuck off me!” you cried out, teyinf to move your hips to a voice his hand but all you did was rub up on his cock, poor thing.

he scoffed, feeling his pants grow tight. you too, felt your pussy begin to throb. just slightly tho.

“no panties? what anyone can fuck you now?” he asked, taking his large, calloused hand and rubbing the curve of your ass, every so gently. “you wanna fuck Gaz? want his cock inside you not mine anymore?” he pouted, eyes wandering to meet yourw in the mirror.

you whimpered, the once confident and mean girl in you disappearing into this weak, submissive one. “answer me.” he spat, landing a sharp smack right on the curve of your ass. you yelped, backing into him and feeling the tent in his pants. “n-no no just you. i promise.”

he rolled his eyes before placing yet another smack to your ass. “liar.”

he kept one hand around your waist, the other huridly yanking his pants off his body. oh how much his cock hurt, restricted in his pants while your wet pussy rubbed against it. it was torture.

it was torture fucking into your stolen panties(by him ofc), moaning your name out every night as he overstimmed his cock. how he reminisced on the feeling of coming inside your warm hole, how you rejected it but he still forced all of it inside you. he could never not cum to that night.

“i told you. quit. i told you i’d take care of you.” he spit onto the head of his cock, spreading it with his free hand as he looked back at you in the mirror. “you’re gonna have my fucking baby. gonna make you mind forever.”

for a moment you felt his head, the next he was almost balls deep inside you. price knows how loud you can get, how sensitive you are. but this time, he was so blinded by anger, he didn’t even care.

so, when you moaned out to him bottoming out inside you, instead of covering your mouth like usual, he slid all the way back before shoving himself right back inside you, gasping at how well your pussy took him in.

“p-price please it.. it hurts.” you cried, tears brimming your eyes as you felt his cock make its way back inside you. but he wasn’t listening. in fact, he was way to busy drooling, literally, watching how your pussy sucked his back up again and again, watching how wet his cock got everytime it came out. “o-oh bunny..” he groaned, his hips picking up speed slowly.

your hands pressed flat against the mirror, watching as your captains head fell back, letting his moans out just as he pleased, no remorse or fear of anyone walking in. “you’re gonna.. gonna be such a good mommy.” he breathed out, his hands moving from your hips to the edge of the sink.

he looked down to you in the mirror, watching as your teary eyes squeezed shut, biting your bottom lip as to not give him the satisfaction that he’s satisfying you. but he saw right through you and laughed, picking up his speed.

“you can try baby i know my cocks making you feel good.. just listen to how good i making you feel.” he smirked, leaning down to your ear and gently tugging it with his teeth. “i know how to make my baby feel good.”

it’s true tho. your pussy was absolutely exposing how good and how much you wanted, no, how much you needed this. “f-fuck Price i hate you.” you choked out, all while tilting your head back to look up at him.

“you hate me baby?” you nodded quickly, whimpering out each thrust he gave. he loved it when you told him you hated him. made coming inside you that much more hot. and you knew that, please.

“tell me how much you hate me.” he panted, letting his hand slip up your body to your throat, holding you there while his cock plunged in and out of you. “i-i hate you and.. and you’re stupid f-face. i never.. wanna see you again.” you spoke, the grip of Prices hand growing tighter as you spoke and as he got closer.

he whimpered out, squeezing his eyes shut as he felt his cock twitch inside you. “tell me you don’t want my cum baby. tell me please.”

despite your mouth being dry from all the harsh breathing you’ve had to do, you swallowed your spit and spoke out. “p-please get off me. i-i don’t want your baby please.”

price panted above you. his eyes rolling back as he felt you begin to pulse around his cock. oh how he loved when you did that, chanting how you didn’t wanna take his cum, but you were milking him so fucking well.

“i-i’m coming baby.. hold still for me.” his hands quickly found your hips, giving a few more deep, fast thrusts as his tip hit right at your gspot . “f-fuck it’s coming baby i-im…” for the first time, Price was actually whimpering out from the pleasure, his legs growing shaky as he used you as stability.

“h-holy.. oh my God..” he panted, his body pressed totally up against you as you bent over the sink painfully. you felt his cock still pulsing inside you, his rapid heartbeat on your back.

for a moment, you wanted to cry. cry because again you let this man fill you with his cum, just to ignore you again. you wanted to cry because you so easily melt in his hands every single time. so you let a tear or two drop, both noticed by the man above you.

“i wont leave you. i… i feel so scared to be honest. i want you, i really want you baby but. i’m scared. i scared myself last time.” he confessed.

he slid out of you, not before pushing back his cum inside you for good measure of course. he caught you in his arms, your weak and wobbly legs unable to hold you up. “but i’m not gonna leave again.. please. let me take care of you. let’s start a family let’s-let’s get fucking married.” he chuckled, pulling your pants up before meeting your gaze.

“marry me. i know it’s wrong but i cant resist you. i need you..” he begged, cupping your face as his eyes locked onto yours…

uhhhh you guys can pick an ending i would love to hear alternative endings!! i find that some ppl really want there to be a different ending that i write so i leave it up to you guys

[stosmanthus]

I’m ready. I’m ready for my ZoLu jealousy rant. Part 1 of 2.

[BTW, this rant is also a behind-the-scenes look at the madness that came over me when I wrote the unsubtly titled fic, “Four Times Zoro Did Not Get Jealous (and the One Time Sanji Confronted Him About It).” Prior reading of the fic is not necessary for enjoyment of my insanity analysis.]

At its core, I believe jealousy arises from 1. a special regard and 2. insecurity. You don’t get jealous over someone you don’t care about. And if you’re confident in the other person’s feelings for you, there’s not much to be jealous about.

With our resident swordsman, he definitely holds Luffy in high regard, meaning there would be reason to feel jealous over Luffy. The question then becomes, has Zoro ever been given a reason to feel insecure about his place in Luffy’s life?

My stance on this is a solid NO.

I believe Zoro knows his worth, partly because he has ALWAYS worked hard to earn his place beside Luffy. He trains constantly and goes above and beyond to do everything he can to stay by Luffy’s side and be Luffy’s “wing.” And Luffy has shown time and time again that he trusts Zoro implicitly in pretty much everything except for directions. Zoro is Luffy’s voice of reason, moral support, enabler, and rabid attack dog rolled into one muscular package. Luffy appreciates the crap out of Zoro, and he has never hesitated to show it. He calls for Zoro first, is always delighted to see him, and gives Zoro the Sabo face-glomp treatment (TM) after just two weeks apart. Yes, all Straw Hats are created equal, but I’ll fight every One Piece fan to defend my view that in the eyes of canon Luffy, Zoro may just be a tad more special.

My point is, Luffy has never given Zoro a reason to be jealous, and Zoro is secure enough in his position within Luffy’s life that he doesn’t feel threatened by anyone else. He’s been petty, sure, like his insistence that he is worth twice as many men as Sanji, but I do think that is just Zoro’s competitiveness. Because why on earth would Zoro be jealous over Luffy? Who can even come between them??!

Don’t get me wrong, I like to indulge in a jealous Zoro fic any time. In fact, if you know any, send a link my way pls! At my core, however, I don’t think Zoro is the jealous type. Not over Luffy at least. Shippers of other Zoro pairings? You do you.

However! There’s always a caveat. I do believe Zoro gets possessive, but in the way that all Straw Hats get possessive over Luffy. Because Luffy is theirs. And when Luffy nearly kills himself to save a whole kingdom, I think they get a little protective over their captain, and they’d want to keep him to themselves for a while. Ultimately, they know they can’t. Luffy is meant for the world to love, and all the Straw Hats know this. Zoro knows this more than anyone, having been THE FIRST.

So at the end of an adventure, when the fight is over and adrenaline leaves him, I think Zoro frets and anguishes so much that he wants to lock up his captain in a room where nobody else can take another piece of him, because Luffy has given enough, dammit. But Zoro doesn’t do that, because Luffy would not want him to.

In summary, the conclusion of my book report is that no, Zoro doesn’t get jealous.

(But what about Luffy?! That’s coming in Part 2. I need to first write another 1000 words of my next fic.)

[pixeltwix]

-Unrelated McGucket Ramblings

Because my mental illness is metal illnessing my brain has been having a wonderful time combining interests. Specifically gravity falls and the Odyssey of all things?

The parallels between Fiddleford, Emma May, and Tate -& Odysseus, Penelope, and Telemachus is driving me bonkers. EVERYTIME I hear songs like ‘There Are Other Ways’, ‘I’m Just A Man’, and ‘Love in Paradise’ I can so vividly see Fiddleford so ardently longing for home, for his wife, for his son, but something or some event keeps pulling him back every single time he has a mind to just go home. I can’t help but let my head make the connections and rewire silly lyrics to fit closer together than I already feel they are.

‘Back at home my wife awaits for me, she’s my everything, my Emma May. And she’s all my power, all my power, but it’s been (x) long years. Oh (x) long years since I have seen my wife, and now the god of (chaos) is out to end my life-“

Additionally while I do not see Emma May as Calypso to any degree, her few lines in ‘Love in Paradise’ stuck out so hard to me if it was outside of the context of Calypso & Odysseus’s no good very bad situation. Just the-

“It will be fine dear, come back inside dear, love of my life come back to paradise. I know your life’s been hard, I’ll stay inside your heart. I love you my dear, I love our time here, life would be so much worse if you had died. Please stay away from harm, stay in my open arms.”

Is SO POST FIRST PORTAL TESTING FIDDLEFORD CODED- when Emma May finally comes up for herself to check on him in Gravity Falls and sees his condition. I refuse to believe for a moment that she didn’t at least try to understand what was going on before fearing for her and her sons life. Finding her husband most likely stumbling around like he doesn’t even know himself or where he is, trying to soothe and bring him back to her. And at first it seems like it’s working, like he’s slowly piecing together what she’s putting down, but then he’s sparking, spiraling again. She tries a final time to coax him from whatever whirl of madness he’s gotten himself into, but it never gets better. In fact it keeps getting worse. But just the vISUAL ALONE of her with that part of the song trying to bring him away from harm all the while he’s still deeply haunted with the ‘all I hear are screams’. AHHH-

Additionally the narrative of Penelope stalling her suitors for YEARS because she’s hoping, praying, that her husband is still alive, still out there somewhere. That maybe just maybe he’ll come home. I am screAMING and pointing at the Emma May core of it all. I’ve been meaning to develop elderly FiddEm dynamic be it platonic for the sake of recovery, but my biggest thing with her design is despite after all these years she sTILL carries aspects of her husband with her. Be it wearing his old specs he left at home or still keeping her floral motif with her brooch. She still loves him deep down- she always will, and she’s always gonna mourn the life that could’ve been if Bill hadn’t been involved, but still. Keeping him as apart of her even if she ‘hated’ him for so long kept her going.

Also idk plus just the-

‘Hell no, I could kill you where you stand. I’m no pet, I’m a married man.’

Is silly to me because I know it would be very ooc for Fiddleford to have THAT much bite even if he is capable of ‘lashing out’. Regardless it’s still amusing brain movie content to envision-

If I didn’t already have so many other ideas on hand I’d draw this all myself, but raaaaa so many other concepts I wanna draw first :(

[aticklishpercivalwriter]

Is Scaramouche Secretly a lee? (fic)

Tickletober 2024 - Day 5: (Un)tie

Links to Artworks: Sethos (@shikaEin), Wanderer (@wa_bx55091), Durin (@mogyiu)

Summary: Durin is curious about whether or not Wanderer is ticklish or not. Sethos, being the good boyfriend he is, shines some light on the matter.

A/N: I’ll be honest, I think this year’s TickleTober will be sitting quite a while in wip. If I participate in TickleTober next year, it will probably be a weekly thing instead of per day. Happy that I got this one out eventually though :) Besides that, no other notes so just relax and enjoy reading this fic!

Inspiration: Special thanks to @chibimochii’s SethoScara tickle art and @rachi-roo’s pass-the-lee game. Didn’t realize how much I really wanted to see Scara get tickled :P (Also these works put me in a lee mood but let’s just ignore that 😅)

Word Count: 2191 (honestly didn’t expect it to be this long, got carried away, whoops) Also on AO3!

—

Wanderer and Sethos were in the living room, Scara sitting on Sethos’s lap, purring in content as the latter carded his hands through his hair. No words needed to be said to know that they both wanted this and to bask in each other’s presence as the others did their thing.

“Hat Guy!” Their cheerful little dragon flew in with curiousness in his eyes as he hovered beside them.

“I told you not to call me that,” Scara huffed, patting his head gently. “We’re close now so call me by what the others call me.”

“So, can I call you babygirl?”

Wanderer stared at him in disbelief and Sethos burst out laughing.

“Ahahahaha!”

“No, you can’t that-”

He caught Durin’s eyes and saw a playful look in them and it struck him as he let out an exasperated sigh.

“Sethos, you are a bad influence.”

Sethos only laughed harder.

“Why ahahare youhu blahaming mehehe?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the fact that you and Durin are teaming up on me,” he said, glaring at the two.

“Nooooo, we weren’t. Right, Durin?”

“Yeah!”

After a beat passed, Scara sighed again.

“You two are insufferable. What did you need anyway, Durin?”

“Oh yeah! I wanted to ask if you are ticklish.”

Wanderer was surprised yet again while Sethos laughed his ass off behind him.

“Seth, you are doing this on purpose!”

“Nohohoho! I swehehear I’m nohohot! Nohohot this tihihime!”

“I’m just curious!” Durin chirped. “I always see you tickling Sethos and the others being tickled but not you. So, are you ticklish?”

He looked at Wanderer and then Sethos curiously.

“Oh, he is ticklish,” Sethos smirked, grabbing onto his wrists and holding them above his head.

“What? Wait, stop! You stupid bee, let me go!”

“Believe it or not, he doesn’t mind being a lee,” he continued, ignoring him.

Scara was glaring daggers at Sethos trying to pull his arms down and Sethos knew full well what his glare meant. I’m so going to wreck you later when we are alone. Will he suffer? Yes. Will it be worth it? Oh yeah. Any chance to wreck his boyfriend is an opportunity he will take, no matter the consequences.

“A lee?” Durin asked, confused before lighting up with realization. “Oh! So, the one who is being tickled, like you all the time!”

It was Sethos’s turn to blush as Scara snickered.

“Y-Yeah, like what you said but enough about me and more about this lee right here,” putting the attention back to Scara. “Two things you will learn today, Durin. One, Scara is ticklish and two, he actually likes to be the lee no matter how much he denies it.”

“Those are not true,” he denied. “Durin don’t believe whatever he is saying. It isn’t truehe-mmph!”

Scara bit his lip when he felt Sethos trail his fingers along his side. Shaking his head in silent denial and squirming as he tried to pull his arms down.

“Durin.”

“Yeah?”

“Hold on to his wrists for me.”

“Okay,” he says, flying over and taking Scara’s wrists in his soft claws.

“No!”

Scara shook his head at Durin, gently tugging at his wrists and trying to slip out of his grip.

“Should I let him go or…”

“Nope, just keep him trapped. You trust me, right?”

Durin looked between the two before looking back at Sethos and nodding his head. The look of betrayal on Scara’s eyes almost made Sethos laugh but he held it in and went to kiss his lover’s cheek in compensation and patted Durin’s head.

“Alright, watch closely~”

“How many times do I have to tell you both that I’m not tihi-mph!”

Scara clamped his mouth shut, jumping in surprise when Sethos squeezed his sides and slid his fingers up and down over and over again.

“What was that honey?” Sethos dipped his head down, whispering into his ears. “Not what? Why don’t you tell us what you were about to say?” Sethos teased, challenging him.

Scara stayed silent, glaring at him with an annoyed scowl and defiantly shaking his head.

“Playing tough guy, aren’t you? How about if I do this?”

Sethos crawled his fingers up towards his armpits making him gasp and immediately squirm and try to curl in on himself but Durin, who was surprisingly strong even though he was small, kept him from doing so as his arms were kept over his head, leaving Sethos to explore the smooth expanse of his hollows.

Scara’s resolve was crumbling by the second as Sethos used feather-light touches to coax a reaction out of him. It was a losing battle as each stroke of his fingers felt unbearable. The soft caresses sent goosebumps all over his body and best worst of all…he wanted more. To have Sethos whisper teases in his ear. To let go and be at his mercy as he tickled him to pieces.

“Ooh! He’s smiling!” Durin exclaimed once he saw a quirk of his lips. “But, if he is ticklish, shouldn't he be laughing by now?”

“Patience, Durin,” Sethos laughed. “He’s just being a stubborn brat holding in his laughter but that will change soon~,” he said, pinching the junction between Scara’s side and armpit, earning a squeak.

“Make sure you hold onto his wrists tightly because when I do this, he is going to let out a flood of laughter~”

“Stupid behehee, I am gohoing toho kill you lahater,” Scara whispered, trying to sound menacing but his giggling took away the effect.

“I’m sure you will, honey~”

“What are you going to do?” Durin asks.

Sethos looked back towards him, grinning.

“Just watch and learn. Get ready~”

Scara felt him going downwards and he instantly shook his head, squirming intensifying as he sent pleading gazes to both Sethos and Durin. Sethos though only grinned a devilish smirk while Durin was too fascinated by what was about to happen.

“Sehehethos! Don’t! Plehehease! I-I’ll do ahahanythihing!” he whispered into his neck.

“Anything huh?”

“Yehehes!”

“Hmm…tempting, but no. You deserve this for all the times you tickled me.”

That was the last thing Scara heard before succumbing to laughter once Sethos dove right into his hip windows.

“SEHEHETHOS! NOHOHOHO! GEHEHEHET OHOHOFF MEHEHE YOU DUHUHUMB BEHEHEE!”

“He’s ticklish!” Durin exclaimed excitedly. “Sethos, I wanna try! Let me try too! Please!”

“I’M NOHOHOT TIHIHICKLISH AND DOHOHON’T YOU DAHAHARE, SEHEHETHOS!”

“Someone’s excited to tickle the angry kitten,” Sethos chuckled, wincing once the words left his mouth. He’s going to die later, isn’t he? “Let me have my way with him for a little and I’ll let you try tickling him, okay?”

“Yay!” Durin’s eyes sparkled with delight.

“I’LL GEHEHET YOU BOHOHOTH BAHAHACK FOHOHOR THIHI- AHAHAHA!” he let out a guffaw of laughter when he felt thumbs rubbing deep circles into his hip bones. “YOUHUHU KNOHOHOW IHHIT’S BAHAHAD THEHEHERE! BWAHAHAHA!”

“That’s why I went here, my sweet honey~ You like it?”

“NOHOHOHO! STAHAHAP IHIHIT!”

“He says, arching into the fingers massaging his hips,” Sethos narrated, laughing.

“SHUHUHUT UP!” a blush making its way on his face, alongside the redness of laughing.

“I actually think you like this~ What do you think, Durin?”

“Yeah! He is laughing and smiling a lot.”

“THAHAHAT MEHEHEANS NOHOHOTHING!”

Sethos rolled his eyes. “Such a stubborn lee you are,” he says, blowing a raspberry on his neck, earning a loud squeal before pulling away completely.

“Your turn, Durin~”

“Finally!”

Sethos smiled at their dragon, taking Scara’s wrists in his again though this time, tying them up with his scarf.

“NO! Seth, you better let me go or I’ll make you suffer later.”

“How about you just admit you are ticklish and actually like this and then I’ll let you go?”

“You are a- HAHAHAhahaha! D-DurihiHIHIN! NOHOHO! Stahahap!”

Scara was defenseless against the onslaught of ticklish licks that Durin inflicted upon him. Through his cackles, Durin was taking his sweet time, enjoying the effect he was having against Scara. Meanwhile, Sethos was smirking and casually watching Durin have fun and his love trying to scrunch up his neck to no avail.

“Try his ears!”

“NOHOHO! DohOHOhon’t! Nohoho snahahacks fohohor youhuHUHUHU- NAHAHAHA!”

His pleas and threats fell upon deaf ears as Durin mischievously licked and nibbled against his ears. He squealed, shaking his head to dodge his dragon but Durin was faster, flying back and forth and switching spots randomly like a pro ler. Even Sethos was kind of feeling bad for his honey when he fell into hysterics, though just a little. Who would have thought that their dragon was a ler at heart?

“DUHUHURIN PLEHEHEASE! STAHAHAP! I’M TIHIHICKLISH! I’M TICKLISH OHOHOKAHAY! PLEHEHEASE STAHAHAHAP!”

Durin pulled away, grinning happily as Scara fell onto his side, curling into himself as he gasped for breath, little giggles slipping out.

“That was fun! Can we do it again?”

“Nohoho…”

“Aww, I wanna do it again though.”

“Sehethos, tell him noho.”

“Can I, pleaseee?”

Durin gave Sethos the cutest dragon eyes he can muster and Sethos gave in instantaneously. How can he deny those eyes?

“Well, how about we both tickle him? How does that sound?”

Durin cheered while Scara inwardly groaned, already inching away like a caterpillar.

“And where do you think you’re going?~”

Before Scara knew what was happening, he was yanked back, laying across Sethos’s lap and looking up at a devious bee and a gleeful dragon.

“You still haven’t told us you liked this,” Sethos teased, circling his navel with a finger.

Scara squirmed in his lap, biting back a smile.

“It’s because I don’t.”

Durin and Sethos exchanged a look.

“What? No, you both stay away. Stay awahahay! Waitwaitwahahait! NOHOHOHOHO!”

Scara dissolved into laughter, louder than before as he felt Durin’s soft claws against his armpits and Sethos’s fingers plunging into his belly button. The ticklish sensations causing his brain to short-circuit as he struggled against them half-heartedly.

“Don’t be shy. C’mon, say that you actually like this.”

“NEHEHEHEVER!”

“Tch, maybe this will encourage you then.”

Sethos started kneading his hip with one hand and scribbling across his belly with the other, occasionally dipping into his navel to scratch inside. A spike of excitement rushed through him as he threw his head back.

“BWAHAHAHA! SEHEHETHOS! I HAHAHATE YOUHUHU! GAHAHAHA!” He then felt Durin move to his other armpit, even adding little licks to his neck and making him frantically pull at his still-tied wrists.

“DURIHIHIN! NOHOHOT THEHEHERE! AHAHAHA!”

“Good job Durin!”

“YOU GUYS AREHEHE EHEHEVILLL!”

“You know how to stop this~”

Scara weighed his options in his tickle-addled brain and although he is loving the tickling, he doesn’t think his body could handle anymore.

“AHAHAHAHA! FIHIHIHINE! I LIHIHIKE THIHIHIS! THEHEHERE! NOHOHOW STAHAHAP!”

“Like what?~”

This asshole.

“YOU KNOHOHOW WHAHAHAT!”

“No, I don’t know. Do you know Durin?” Sethos winked at him.

“I don’t know,” Durin played dumb, winking back.

“I’LL KIHIHIHILL YOU BOHOHOTH!”

“Nuh uh, not if we do it first. Now Durin!”

If Scara thought they went all out before, he was certainly wrong. He exploded in laughter, jerking side to side as Sethos went to town on his hips and squeezing his thighs while Durin flew back and forth, switching tactics on the fly.

“AHAHAHAHAHA! PLEHEHE- NAHAHAHAHA!”

All he could do was laugh and laugh as his boyfriend and dragon sent him into ticklish heaven. He hasn’t laughed like this in a while and the giddy feeling flowing through him was making him feel like he was on cloud nine. He felt so warm inside and just what words cannot describe. However, as with all good things, they must come to an end and his body was telling him that he couldn’t handle much more.

“MEHEHE- HAHAHAHA! MERCY! MEHEHERCY! I LIHIHIHIKE- AHAHAHA! I LIKE BEHEHING THEHE LEHEHEHEE! THE LEHEHEE! PLEHEHEASE!”

They immediately stopped, Durin moving to untie his hands as Sethos massaged the residue tickles away.

“Thahahank youhuhu. Thank youhu.”

“There’s your answer Durin, he is ticklish and actually likes it~”

“Sethos, plehease shut up. It’s embarrassing. And for the record, only sometimes.”

“That was fun!” Durin excitedly said. “I want to do it again soon.”

He looked at Scara with hopeful eyes, making the latter look away.

“O-Only when I’m in the mood.”

“Yay!”

“Hey, what about me? Do I get a pass to tickle you too?”

“No. You actually will be punished and you too Durin, but just a little for you.”

“Aww, okay,” Durin sighed while Sethos gulped, weary of what his love might do but excited, nonetheless.

“But not right now. I just wanna yawn sleep.”

He snuggled up to Sethos, making Sethos’s heart melt at the sight as he laid down beside him.

“I love you,” Sethos said, kissing his forehead.

“Love you too,” Scara mumbled back, making Sethos chuckle.

“Don’t forget about me!”

Durin flew into the space between them as the two lovers wrapped their arms around each other and their dragon.

“Love you, Durin,” Scara and Sethos said in unison.

“I love you both too!”

The happiness of Durin was infectious as both Scara and Sethos smiled before closing their eyes and drifting off to sleep, Durin following suit a moment later.

This is what love feels like. My home.

—

Here’s some leftover rough planning and writing for this fic for those who like this stuff and how it all comes together :) If it seems unorganized, unformatted, wrong grammar, etc., it’s because it’s supposed to be. Rough for a reason :)

SethoScara

Living room

Scara denies being ticklish in front of Durin. Sethos proves him wrong. Tells Durin to hold Scara’s hands up. Scara’s voice wavers but doesn't back down. Durin is eager and curious, while Sethos has a devious smirk. Once it starts, Scara bites his lip to hide his smile and to hold back his giggles, gently pulling at his wrists, not wanting to hurt Durin.

Sethos grabs the Halloween decorations and wraps them around Wanderer.

Durin observes the others tickling each other, learning the words lee and ler and asks Scara if he is a lee in the presence of Sethos. Sethos bursts out laughing while Scara goes with a blunt no though a blush is visible on his cheeks. He can be a lee sometimes. Scara sends him a warning glance. Durin goes I wanna see!

Scara refuses to raise his arms, Sethos telling Durin to grab his arms when he does this. Durin says what, then Sethos says this and squeezes Scara on the sides. Making him squeal in surprise and moving his arms to protect himself but Durin was quicker and with a fellow swoop, captured his wrists and raised them above his head. Dragon strength :)

I actually think you like this. What do you think Durin.

Yeah! He is laughing and smiling a lot.

Scara weakly…

I wanna try! Lemme try! Please!

And how could Sethos refuse those pleading eyes of his as he took over restraining his boyfriend’s hands and let Durin explore.

Scara tried to sternly tell Durin not to do it but he was too excited to not try tickling him. Adding insult to injury, Sethos poked his sides as he talked, making his speech all squeaky.

I'll get you both back he said as his threats weren't working. He instinctively squirmed away from Durin as he got close.

“Stay away!” His voice wavered but Durin hesitantly backed off making his heart drop if he actually scared his baby dragon.

“I-”

“He doesn't mean it Durin. It's normal for ticklish people to say that and other stuff. He actually likes being tickled so don't hold back.”

Sethos beat him to it and he could hear that smirk in his voice. In any other situation, he would've sent a death glare to him but he sighed in relief as the scared and hesitant look disappeared from Durin’s eyes and was replaced with eagerness and curiosity.

and scara falls on to his side, trying to escape. sethos straddles him, back against the couch, durin uses his soft claws against his armpits and upper body/sides, little licks on his neck. sethos focuses on his hips again, navel, and lower sides. scara finally admits he is ticklish and likes being the lee…sometimes and they both stop. Sethos collapsing on him and hugging him turning them on their sides and Durin perching on the top/lying in the middle (they make room for him)

Fluffy ending with them in each other’s arms plus Durin OR Durin leaves and Scara and Sethos have their alone time again with Scara pushing Sethos down and Sethos thinking he is going to be tickled but instead they are making out while Scara goes, “Payback for that stunt you did. Think you can keep up?” Tickle payback eventually too…

—

[sofa-king-lame]

Buck and Eddie roadtrip in Texas 👀

Ok so I actually started writing this one MONTHS ago and then abandoned it, but now (after 8x08) I feel like I could pick it back up again with better added context.

Basically they go on a road trip (like maybe they fly to Austin for an event or something and decide to hire a car and drive back through El Paso to get Chris or something). Buck isn't sleeping bc insomnia is a bitch and Eddie researches the shit out of different techniques he can use to help Buck.

Here's a snippet:

--

“Have you tried jacking off right before you go to sleep?” Eddie asks as Buck leaves the bathroom and Buck walks right into the arm chair. 

“The fuck, Eddie,” he groans, bending over to rub his poor dead pinky toe. 

“Sorry, just checking. It’s an obvious one though, so...” Eddie trails off and looks at Buck pointedly. Buck wants to die. 

“Yes, Eddie, I’ve tried that. Didn’t help. Next tip, please.” 

“Counting sheep,” Eddie suggests. He’s sitting cross-legged on the bed in just sweatpants and Buck still wants to die. 

“Oh yeah that’s super fun until my brain can’t stop counting and suddenly it’s 4am and I’ve visualised seven fucking thousand sheep jump over a rickety wooden fence,” Buck snorts. He slumps into the armchair and rubs his eyes aggressively, listening to Eddie’s breathing. The room is (creepily) silent and Buck’s skin is prickling. 

“Visualise moving all the furniture in your room,” Eddie reads off his phone. 

“Great until hyper-fixation kicks in and I get up and actually start moving furniture. Remember three weeks ago when you came over for breakfast and I was passed out on my bed against the opposite wall?” Buck reminds Eddie pointedly. “I need new mental games.” 

“Hmm. Well according to this person on Reddit you shouldn’t think of them as mental games because it’s not meant to be fun,” Eddie snorts. 

“Yeah fuck that person. Going to sleep should be fun and if it helps me to think of mental exercises as games then that’s what I’ll do, random Reddit asshole,” Buck huffs. He’s way more annoyed than he should be about this but Eddie doesn’t say anything, just hums in agreement. Buck appreciates Eddie rolling with his spiralling and not telling him to ‘just sit the fuck down and relax’ like Tommy used to. Buck wants to die a little less now, but not by much. 

“Have you tried counting backwards?” Eddie asks, tilting his head to the left a little. The gel he’d put in his hair in the morning has lost its hold and his hair flops to the side, falling over his forehead. 

“Ah see that one I’ve actually had a little success with.” Buck stands up from the armchair – his pinky toe has miraculously not fallen off and he can, in fact, walk. He sits down opposite Eddie, close enough that their knees are almost touching (because it’s only a double bed, not because Buck just wants an excuse to be close to Eddie, nope). 

“But not so much recently?” 

“I count backwards by threes starting at nine hundred and ninety-nine,” Buck starts, and absolutely does not shift slightly so that his and Eddie’s knees are actually touching. 

“Oddly specific, do explain,” Eddie muses. He still looks sleepy, despite his four-hour nap in the car. Buck wants to hold his stupid hand. 

“Doing it that way hits every triple digit – eight eighty-eight, seven seventy-seven, blah blah blah,” Buck trails off, waving his hand dismissively. “Which is satisfying but is also a pattern that my brain latches on to and after a few nights it’s not engaging enough to keep my attention and I start tuning out the counting and get distracted by other things.” 

“That - I mean I can’t relate, I don’t know what that’s like but it sounds really fucking frustrating. I’m sorry,” Eddie murmurs warmly, placing a calloused hand on Buck’s knee and yep, Buck is going to die tonight. 

--

I've written 5.3k words of this one lol. I've just got so many WIPs/fics I want to start!

[vanishxcanvas]

Shivering

Emmrich Volkarin x F!Rook!Reader

Oneshot / Imagine

Content Warning: Fluff.

Prompt: "Darling, you're shivering. Come here, let me warm you up."

(credit to thelonelyempath)

Note: Ever since I laid eyes on this man, I have been severely unwell!! (I’m fine!) - also, Emmrich and Rook are already in a relationship when this is taking place. This might be a little short since it’s been a minute since I’ve written something.

You were not the biggest fan of the cold. In fact, you dreaded cold weather. On this particular night, you were trying to sleep. Even with blankets, you were freezing.

The others had gone to bed already, except for Emmrich. A thought came to your head to get up and keep him company, but another told you to try and get some sleep.

After fighting with your brain for what felt like forever (it was actually only 15 minutes), you finally get up and go see what he’s up to. You saw his lights were still on, so you eventually made your way to his room. He saw you walk in, and he smiled.

“Why hello, dearest. I thought you were going to get some rest?” He comments.

“I was, but I’m way too cold and it’s preventing me from sleeping. Thought I’d come in here a while until I feel like I can sleep.” You reply.

Emmrich walks closer to you and immediately senses that you’re cold. “Darling, you’re shivering. Come here, let me warm you up.”

“And how do you plan on doing that?” You ask.

“You’ll sleep in here tonight, maybe it will help to sleep next to someone….familiar.” He replies.

“I’d like that, Emmrich.” You say, smiling lightly.

He takes your hand in his, and the both of you get ready for bed. To finally sleep.

When in bed, Emmrich pulls you closer to him. “Get some sleep, darling.” He says, kissing your forehead.

“I’ll try. Goodnight, Emmrich.” You reply, kissing under his jaw.

He smiles, and wraps his arms around you before the two of you eventually fall asleep.

[guhamun]

CALCHARO SCOFFED, LIPS CURLING slightly into a hint of a smile as his gaze came to rest upon the other once more. ❝Quite rich.❞ What a mess they were, stumbling about like drunkards in the dark. None had any idea what either was feeling, nor how to properly translate that into something that made sense. Still, he did appreciate that Jiyan was attempting. They were doing far better than himself, but there were many reasons for that, most of which stemming from his atrocious social skills for one. ❝But it’s fine. I wasn’t aware that I made you feel the way you did, so this was what I needed to hear.❞ People were most honest when their emotions flared, and hearing Jiyan actively say things that were other than respectable or nice, was certainly different. He was always polite when he spoke; always mindful of what passed his lips when other people were involved, that catching him out of his element had certainly not been…remotely expected. ❝And,❞ he continued, ❝you needed to speak it, clearly, so it was a win-win all around.❞ Calcharo valued honesty, anyway. Nothing was lost during Jiyan’s vent.

     Even so, there was relief in seeing that smile again. Muscles he had not been aware were tense, slowly relaxed once more upon bearing witness to it. ❝I’ll be honest in turn.❞ He shifted a little, making himself a bit more comfortable before he continued. ❝Admittedly, I don’t understand half of this. I don’t understand your thought process, nor can I really understand my own. I'm attempting, though. My questions are just me trying to see how much of what you say matches with mine. It’s ridiculous to probably do things in that manner, and it seemed to make you feel like I was purposely prodding, but there was a reason behind it.❞ Did it help? A little. A bit. Jiyan’s words had a great affect on him, which was…strange, yet not…necessarily a bad thing. He simply wasn’t used to the storm that was this man, nor his brand of honest rhetoric. One would think the general would be more reserved.

     He was, and he wasn’t.

     What a bizarre contradiction. ❝I like being around you. You’re trustworthy and can get things done. Reliable. Steadfast.❞ There was a pause from him, Calcharo suddenly feeling awkward. Stating facts was one thing, going deeper than that was another. ❝But most of all, I like seeing facets of you that others don’t get to see. Your eyes seem brighter when you smile, for one. You also have a nice laugh. It’s pleasant to listen to. Even the parts you think of as ‘unseemly’ – those are just the human aspects of you that you hardly had a chance to do much with. There’s nothing wrong with it. Just means you’re being more yourself, is all. Sometimes you just have to let the frustration out instead of keeping it locked up.❞ He chuckled, soft, airy. ❝Anyway…you have to make it up to me for making me talk this much in one sitting. That’s not helping me take it easy, you know. Had my mind working overtime too without any kind of payment for all that effort.❞ He was only joking, his tone lighthearted rather than accusatory.

"..." Indeed, it wasn’t like him to make assumptions, and it wasn’t like him to get frustrated or metaphorically bare his fangs when mere questions were asked. He wasn't even mad when his detractors treated him with no respect and made up rumors soon after he was appointed general by Jué. So why did he react the way he did with Calcharo? Why was he so affected and overwhelmed when he had no good reason for such? And... he knew perfectly well that they would never try and hurt him on purpose, and yet he still wasn't able to control his emotions. And yet, Calcharo was apologizing to him when the one that should be apologizing should be him. "I apologize for lashing out. I have no excuse for pouring out my frustrations the way I did and treating you poorly when all you did was ask a question." He wanted to hide and look away, as he didn’t want the other to see this unsightly and irrational side of him, but he still forced himself to lift his head and meet the mercenary's gaze.

A small and apologetic smile tugged at the sides of his mouth. It soon widened a little more and became more genuine after hearing what the mercenary said next. "I'm aware it sounds rich coming from me after my little scene, but there's no need to be so dramatic now, Calcharo. If what you say was true, then we wouldn’t be having this conversation in the first place. Water and oil don’t mix, but you have long since left your mark in me." Like a tacet mark on the skin, one's life is never the same after it appears. It becomes part of one, until their frequencies degrade and become part of Solaris-3. "Your company, your words, your very existence makes me happy in a way I may not be able to describe, but I feel and know it nonetheless. I want you in my life, even when you unintentionally make me upset. That's something that will never change. I can promise that much." No matter the circumstances, he would always reach out to them. Wasn't that what he did when...

Jiyan blinked. "I remembered that this was supposed to be an outing to get you to take things easy, yet here I am making you work your brain overtime." And now he felt mortified, covering the lower half of his face with a hand as he momentarily looked away, and then took a deep breath. "I feel deeply ashamed for my poor bedside manners. I swear I have never..." But he couldn't even bring himself to finish that sentence. So, instead, he slowly leaned closer towards the other once more and rested his forehead on their shoulder. Jiyan knew that it made no sense. Not even a few minutes ago he was agitated and frustrated, and yet... This impossible man, who was the reason for his agitation and frustration, only needed to exist in the same space as him to make him feel at ease.

[stuckinapril]

me stoically navigating my way through drama bc bigger things are ahead and it’s not my fault people are dumb

[pepperpixel]

I haven’t posted art in forever, (I am currently working on art tho!! It’s just taking me a bit cuz.. job..) but! But… what about if instead of the art u guys came here for. I instead posted pictures of the cool lil outfits I’ve been wearing recently that im rlly proud of… what about that???

[valkyurii]

it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao

[iamthemaestro]

Oh boy. I have a lot to say on this. I 1000% think that one of the biggest issues in AWI reenactment is the failure to reach the younger generation and I also wish the article had talked more about this and how it intersects with the inclusion of historically marginalized groups within the hobby.

I’ll put it this way: as of 2024, the BAR has an article in their constitution that prohibits women in ranks. As a young, non-male, and only sometimes white-passing reenactor, this has caused me issues in the past. People from the BAR have complained about me—a young, fairly new, dedicated reenactor—being on the field as a musician. Now, I’ve had the good fortune to be part of a unit with significant influence in the hobby, who have gone to bat for me in these instances and allowed me to feel relatively safe coming to these events, but I still can’t take up a musket at a BAR event if I want to. Over the past year I have become acutely aware that if it weren’t for the fact that I do music and not hat company, I would not be able to interpret at these events in the way I have repeatedly proven myself capable of doing.

So you have the primary overarching association responsible for organizing large-scale AWI reenactments literally denying interested, dedicated people from the younger generation the opportunity to participate in the hobby. And this is just one official organization—this is to say nothing of the culture. At the end of the day, sexism, racism, homophobia and transphobia is rampant in these environments. I do think the culture is slowly improving with time, but still, there are spaces where I do not feel safe in the hobby, and I spend a lot of time considering what my future as a reenactor might look like if I ever decide to medically transition, for example. My love for this hobby means I put up with a lot, even within my own unit, but I cannot fault other people who take one look at this mess and decide it’s not worth it. Of course there are going to be less reenactors. If individual units and the overarching organizations are going to actively resist a new generation of young living historians, interest in the hobby is going to waver.

I also think there’s an important distinction to make between so-called “progressive” units and a broader sense of historical accuracy, because ultimately reenactment is a hobby. I strongly believe that no issue of historical accuracy should take precedent over actual issues of discrimination (if we were going to really pursue historical accuracy, we would be excluding probably 90% of the reenactment community as it is!). But I also believe that the spirit of this hobby is one that is educational and authentic: second to having fun and staying safe, of course, I think the priority should be pursuing as accurate of an impression as you can in the meantime. “Progressive” units often get kind of a bad rap but ultimately I think they have the right idea. They’re what’s going to keep this hobby relevant as an educational tool and pursuit, as opposed to just being a bunch of grown men running around playing war with each other. Progressive units are, in my opinion, the future of this hobby. And yet a lot of more conservative units have this weird resistance to this philosophy simply because they don’t… want to have to adapt to what it means, I suppose. But I really do think that if that philosophy prevails, we won’t have educational reenactment—it’s possible we won’t have much in terms of reenactment at all. Ultimately I want to believe this, too, will improve in time, but the fact that we have to violently contest, for example, whether British soldiers had to shave (which they did) just because some reenactors desperately want an excuse not to… does not bode well for garnering interest from historians and enthusiasts in time for the 250th.

Anyway, that’s been my experience. I should probably stop talking about this because I think about it constantly and could go on forever. But that’s my (admittedly rather scathing) two cents on why this is the case.

Who has Wall Street Journal access I heard there’s an article about 250th reenactors and I need the tea

[javierduffy]

drabble about chapter 3 javieran late night discord (campfire) conversations because i love writing the turning point where javier finally lets himself start making moves 💔☹️

“so,” javier gestures with his bottle, the last quarter of it sloshing to get his conversation partner’s attention, “tell me about yourself.”

“oh, i’m…” kieran fiddles with his hands, pries his eyes away from javier’s bottle as the other man takes a swig of it. if he let himself look any longer, they’d end up on his lips. “i’m just me, sir. just kieran duffy. ain’t got much to tell.”

“mh.” javier grunts a reply, and kieran would think that’d be the end of it, if not for the bottle thrust at him to punctuate the response. he thinks javier is just tipsy enough not to be offering essentially backwash on purpose. he hopes it is a kind gesture. he takes it and a swig to boot. rather not be drinking with a man so pretty, but he’d rather not be one to resist one, neither.

“”just” you say. what makes you so little?” javier’s beginning to pop another beer open on his seat. without the light of the moon, the scout campfire now feels like a long, long way from the clemen’s point camp, and he now feels like no one in the world could hear his curiosity. like not a soul in this world around could accuse him of gentility.

kieran, taking the new bottle as an offer to keep the old one, finishes off his drink. shakes his head like it’s bitter. like he isn’t trying to pick apart which taste is the beer and which is javier. “i ‘unno. suppose- no one’s cared so much before. i feel so little, i can’t say i feel right justified in going around and advertising myself. plenty of interesting folk around, and they sure don’t look like me.” javier cocks an eyebrow.

for once since months ago in colter, dark brown eyes meet green, and they stay there. grass plants it’s roots in rich soil, and it feels like home. kieran can see javier’s eyes flicker to his lips, and he convinces himself it meant nothing. uproots himself and looks back at the fire.

javier lets his eyes roam kieran’s profile a bit- his long lashes, his hooked nose, his sunspots- and suddenly he really, really needs another drink. he’s parched. he mirrors the other man’s fixation on the fire with another swig. “can’t say any of us nowadays look too alike. not unless you get the privilege of being born in the city, with money. every man has his story. if you think it is a competition, maybe you should consider yourself lucky that you haven’t lived enough chaos to be “interesting”.”

kieran snorts, “you don’t know the half of it… sir.” he tacks the term messily onto the sentence, hoping it’ll be enough to keep javier from strangling him to death for his tone. instead, he turns to see javier with a wide smile, drooping eyes creasing like a canine with it’s fangs bared. it makes kieran feel cold- like prey who yearns for the warm embrace of his predator’s breath on his neck.

“tell me then. what makes you so interesting and me so ignorant?”

[chibishortdeath]

Ok stupid rant, but I’m sick of looking up a game and only being able to find guides and wikis made by people who obviously hate the game they’re writing information about.

I was looking for guides for the hedge maze portion of Castlevania 64 because I was stuck in it and couldn’t visualize what the layout of maze looks like (turns out, it’s not technically a traditional maze, aka one route to the exit, which helps a lot) and the only guide I can find is one on gamefaqs or something where the person cannot contain themselves from constantly interjecting to say how much they don’t like Malus cause “ugh overdramatic cutscene, his parents are dead who cares, he looks like a girl” or how they hate the game cause it’s too hard and annoying and “oh boy as if this game couldn’t get worse”.

And like dude! Sincerely! Shut up! I don’t care! I just want to know what I’m supposed to do! You are allowed to dislike the game and express your opinions, just please keep those to a little ending opinion section or a review!!! Stop breaking up actual instructions I can’t keep track of what you’re telling me to do!!!!!!!!!!!

And I saw something similar happen on a different smaller wiki-ish sort of website (it might have been the Castlevania Dungeon, I’m not sure. Definitely not Fandom tho.) on the Castlevania: The Adventure page when I was looking for some facts. Again, the person writing was constantly being all “not that this game is important anyway” and like! I literally don’t care if you don’t like the game that’s not what I’m here for!!! Heck the website even had some misinformation on the page too saying that Christopher was Simon’s grandson in that “or whatever, it doesn’t matter” kind of tone! Like!!!!! Shut up!!!!!!!!!!!! I am here for factual information! Not a review!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s just absolutely annoying and now I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do in CV64 cause I can barely process what this guy is saying ugh.