#the disclaimers dont stop you from seeing the content
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sorry uhm I think misinformation warnings on social media when searching up the holocaust is actually good?? Genuinely wild that people are forgoing media literacy and awareness of bias in favour of conspiratorial thinking and paranoia.
Tiktok isn't a reliable source, and if we can't agree on that we have a massive problem.
#anti intellectualism#media literacy#blocking “fascism” and the removed comments are genuinely censorship and that's the only reason im reblogging this dumpster fire#as usual people on X (?) are stupid#nothing else shown here is censorship#the disclaimers dont stop you from seeing the content#OBVIOUSLY recent events like the LA fires may have very wrong information being spread around#what's next? wikipedia is bad???#go back to english class#oh and before I forget: there's enough lies being spread by the actual media and social media about the Hamas-Israel war#maybe a disclaimer there is a good thing#unless you dont want to admit you've been radicalized by peer pressure
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TW for my usual unhinged stance on puppets, if you're following me, you know. If you're not, I'm sorry (not sorry). ((If you're the author or narrator, I'm actually sorry.))
Okay, so because I'm allowed to be freaky on main about puppets on this site, I just wanna tell everyone, because everyone should know that creepypasta narrator Lighthouse Horror just posted a story (by author Alonso Solis) about an evil puppet show a few days ago, and I just listened, and I loved it.
youtube
Now onto freaky business:
Headcanoning the main char as a puppetfucker bc c'mon, that bromance, the way he lovingly describes Mr. Smiley's appearance, what he does before leaving the old studio towards the end... Just... Mmmm... *chef's kiss* love this kinda content. I'll sleep soundly dreaming I could have someone like that. Y'know? Big, glassy eyes, big grin, secret evil laugh, mildly self-animate...
#god i love puppets so much man especially the evil ones but not exclusively yknow#even the word puppet is cute like puppies and i feel warm and fuzzy inside no pun intended (who am i kidding. fully intended)#need me a freak like that#also should probably tw for the story just general creepypasta themes evil puppets kids dyin unreality dubious morality in the main char etc#thats not an exhaustive list tho im not qualified to give an exhaustive list this is a thirst post i just wanna cover all my bases here#puppets#man im not even posting about puppets on my puppet named blog (it was just recommended when i typed that)#and thats a damn shame lmao i should make more so i can revive that blog (its just my art blog i gave up on separating from the main)#suggestive#for the post not the video#creepypasta#(tagging for a tw sorry to put that in the tag if ppl use the tag i have no idea i dont usually post ab creepypastas on here but ...#... given i saw a bunch of ouppet stuff earlier i remembered i can be weird on here about puppets. i guess anywhere...#...but here feels natural to be weird ab them)#ngl i couldnt stop thinkin of ... you know who ... with the description and how the main char keeps him around all the time#mmmmmmmm otp5eva in a different flavour mmmmmmmmm#should probably also confess that#OBLIGATORY: 'DISCLAIMER: i'M HI (HIGH)' TAG#bc im probably gna regret typing all this tmr but fuck man#i love puppets dudeeeeeee i can scream about it forever#ok this is enough im getting too sappy im def gonna regret that#Cori.exe#Post.exe#video#horror#sorry steven and alonso lol i hope yall are too busy to see this im totally normal about puppets it was all a joke#((whispering to followers: its not a joke dont worry i wouldnt play u like that))#((puppetfucker 4 lyfe bruhhh believe it))#((fuck man i love them so much))#i want more evil puppet/etc horror content theres never enough to satisfy me i am insatiable about puppets in horror
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P: Situationship!Heeseung X Fem!Reader (recommended age 18+)
Warnings: Situationship, Hurt/Comfort, Suggestive Content, Tension, Flirting, Mature Content, Pursuing, Possessive & Needy Behaviour, Jealousy if you squint, Alcohol Consumption, Mentioned Drug Use.
Wordcount: 22k
Synopsis: For years, Lee Heeseung had been in your life—never close enough to be a friend but too familiar to be a stranger. You told yourself you weren’t interested, that he didn’t matter to you. But Heeseung had other plans cause he made it his mission to claim your attention—and eventually your heart. But love is never easy.
a/n: was watching the iconic Kuch Kuch Hota Hai when this idea came! (dont ask how) i also wanted to try something new with the title. (disclaimer! some of the scenes are written from experience)
now playing: truth or dare by tyla | friends by chase atlantic | awkward by sza | bloodline by ariana grande | twenty nights by nobu woods | gi faen by ballinciaga
School hierarchy never interested you—peaking in high school, the whole "king of the cafeteria" nonsense. Why would it? None of that mattered after graduation. You always thought it was a waste of time, all those petty dramas and desperate attempts to be remembered as something more than ordinary.
And yet, somehow, you were known, not because you clamored for attention or played into the social games everyone else seemed obsessed with, but because...well, you were you. Quiet, maybe. Not invisible, though. People knew your name, knew your face, even if you couldn’t recall theirs at times. Maybe it was the way you never fumbled over your words when teachers called on you or the way your presence seemed calm. You didn’t try to stand out, but you were noticed, even if you never asked for it.
Made you wonder what made you noticed.
And that question was solved pretty quickly, to be honest. All because you knew Heeseung since you were young.
And Heeseung? Heeseung was everything you’d expect from someone at the top of the high school food chain. Popular, effortlessly so. Basketball captain, the school’s golden boy, practically born to be the main character in someone’s coming-of-age movie. But beyond all that, he was still totally derpy—the same kid who used to trip over his own feet at recess, the one who cried when you beat him in hide-and-seek because he hid in the most obvious spot.
He hadn’t changed much, really. Sure, he had a little more swagger now, a charm that made people laugh at his terrible jokes instead of groan, but to you, he was just Heeseung.
You’d laugh every time someone brought him up to you, trying to see if you’d spill some secret about what he was like outside of the spotlight. “You’re friends with Heeseung, right?�� they’d say, voices dipping into curiosity or jealousy. And you’d shrug, like it wasn’t a big deal. Because to you, it wasn’t.
But somehow, knowing him—having that tether to someone like him—had put you on the radar, too. Even if you weren’t part of his crowd, even if you didn’t sit with him at lunch or go to the parties he got dragged to, people noticed you because he noticed you.
And that was the funny thing, wasn’t it? You never cared about being seen, but Heeseung never stopped looking for you in a room.
You were never really interested in initiating anything with him, even if he was very much 100% interested in initiating something with you.
He’d find you in the hallways, leaning casually against the wall, as if it was second nature for him to cage you in, corner you with a smile that made everything around you feel like it had slowed down. He’d ask you about your day, always interested in the little details you never thought anyone would care about. “Are you busy some day?” he’d ask, eyes sparkling, as if he was hinting at something more—something he probably expected you to say yes to.
Other times, he’d slide into the seat next to you in class, talking about his upcoming game like it was an invitation in itself. “You should come watch,” he'd say with that grin, the one that could melt anyone into agreeing. "I’ll even give you my jersey after I win.”
And then there were the parties—he’d invite you to those too, always the center of attention but always making sure you knew you were welcome. Sometimes he’d just come right up to you, all charm and boldness, flirting with you shamelessly, leaning in so close you could feel his breath on your skin. His presence was so intense, so overwhelming, that you couldn’t help but get those butterflies in your stomach, no matter how much you wanted to stay calm.
And yet, despite all of it—the smiles, the promises, the hints of something more—you rejected his advances.
Every. Single. One.
You couldn’t let yourself get caught up in it. You wouldn’t. Even if every part of you, every part of your mind and heart, screamed to take a chance, to let yourself fall into whatever Heeseung was offering, you pushed him away.
Mostly because you knew what type of person he was now. You saw how he was with other women in school, how effortlessly he had them wrapped around his finger, how they would come to him at the snap of his finger, eyes wide and eager for whatever he had to offer. They were drawn to him like moths to a flame, following him like he was the sun and they were planets orbiting around him. And, honestly, it was hard not to see the way his charm worked, how his attention seemed to shift from one girl to the next as if it was all just a game.
A game that you weren’t interested in playing.
You weren’t just going to be another face in the crowd, another person who would fall for his flirtations, get swept up in the thrill of his attention only to be tossed aside when someone else caught his eye. You were different. You had to be.
Heeseung was the type who could have anyone, but you weren’t just anyone. You were stronger than that, smarter than that. You didn’t need to be one of his many admirers to feel valued.
So, you kept saying no, keeping a distance, watching the way he’d grin like it was no big deal, then go off to let his attention drift somewhere else. And deep down, you knew you weren’t immune to it. Maybe you never would be. But the answer stayed the same.
That didn’t mean Heeseung didn’t stop going after you.
If anything, it seemed like the more you pulled away, the harder he tried. You'd find him lingering around your classes, catching you in the hallways, or showing up in places where you didn’t expect him to be. It was like a game to him, though you weren't sure if he knew it was to you. Maybe he thought he could win you over if he tried hard enough, if he kept being persistent, kept flashing that grin and throwing out just enough charm to keep you on the edge of saying yes.
He’d joke with you, pretending to be playful, leaning in with a wink like you were both in on some shared secret no one else understood. But you knew better. You could see through the act, see the way his eyes would light up when he thought he was getting close. It was almost like a challenge to him now, something he couldn’t let go of.
But you kept saying no.
And he kept coming back for more.
You would think that someone like him would give up after rejection, after rejection. But nooooo.
If anything, Heeseung only seemed more determined with each "no" you threw at him. You’d catch him looking at you with amusement, as if he were trying to figure you out, like you were some puzzle he couldn’t quite solve. You could almost hear the wheels turning in his head, plotting his next move. It wasn’t just persistence—it was obsession in its own strange way.
He’d show up at your locker with an extra wide grin, as if all the past rejections were just another small obstacle, one he was determined to overcome. He’d ask about your plans for the weekend, your favorite movie, your favorite ice cream flavor—all these little things that seemed innocent enough but were clearly his way of getting closer to you, of worming his way in until you couldn’t say no anymore. And each time, you’d refuse, hold firm.
It was like a tug-of-war, except you were the one refusing to be pulled.
And yet, he never stopped to one point that there was a part of you that wondered, almost begrudgingly, if anyone had ever resisted him like this before. You could almost hear the chuckles of his friends in the background, no doubt betting on how long it would take before you gave in.
It did kind of surprise you when, one day, you were walking down the hallway, busy trying to find your gum in your bag, when you accidentally overheard a girl confessing to Heeseung. You stopped, pausing mid-step as you heard her voice, trembling with nerves, pouring out her feelings to him.
You looked down the hallway you were passing, and there he was, standing with his back to you, his attention fully on the girl in front of him. She was shy, her words stumbling over each other, her face flushed as she nervously admitted what everyone probably already knew. She liked him. She wanted him.
But what he did next was something you did not expect at all.
He rejected her.
The words hit you before you could even process them. "I’m sorry," he said, his voice calm but firm. "But there’s someone else I’m interested in. Someone I want." He didn’t hesitate. Didn’t even seem to waver. He was polite, but his words were clear and final.
The girl stood frozen for a moment, looking down, clearly embarrassed. You could see the brief flicker of pain on her face, but she nodded and walked away quickly, her head down.
You felt an unexpected sting in your chest, a strange mix of confusion and something else you couldn’t quite put your finger on. You couldn’t decide if it was relief or disappointment or... something else.
And as Heeseung turned around, casually adjusting his jacket, you quickly stepped into a side hallway, out of sight, your heart beating a little too fast for comfort. You had never expected to see something like that, especially not from him. Never from him. And it made you wonder, question everything you thought you knew about him.
Because after that moment, it seemed like he rejected girl after girl, all while still pursuing you with that same relentless determination. It was strange. You would never catch him kissing other women anymore, never saw pictures on social media of him with a girl on his lap at parties, never heard whispers of him flirting with anyone else. It was like the world around him had faded, and the only focus, the only person who mattered, was you.
No one else but you.
It made you question everything. Was he really serious about you? Or was this just some strange game he was playing, a challenge to see if he could win you over when everyone else had fallen for his charm? Or was it something more than the surface-level attention he gave everyone else? You tried to shake the thoughts from your mind, tried to ignore the way your heart fluttered when you realized you were the only one he seemed to want.
But the more you thought about it, the more it made you uneasy. Did you trust him? Or were you walking into a trap?
If it was a trap, it was a pretty good one, because something changed between the dynamic of you and Heeseung. You grew more compliant, more willing to give him a little piece of your attention, a little more of your time. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to make him shift gears. Heeseung, who had always been so confident, so certain, now seemed a little more desperate, a little more eager to make you notice him, to make you smile.
He’d go out of his way to do the smallest things just to get a reaction from you—whether it was showing up with your favorite drink, offering to carry your bag when you were weighed down with books, or trying to impress you with his random trivia knowledge that he knew you secretly found endearing. His usual cool composure was slipping, and in its place was a version of him you hadn’t seen since you were young.
And frankly, it was kinda cute.
It was like he was a little boy again, trying so hard to win your approval, doing whatever he could to get you to look his way, to see him the way he wanted you to.
You expected to play a little around with his attention, to enjoy the way he’d chase you, all while ignoring the stares you got from other girls. It wasn’t anything serious, just a game, a harmless little back-and-forth that didn’t have to mean anything. You didn’t expect it to go anywhere—after all, this was Heeseung, the golden boy who had his pick of anyone. He was just... fun to be around, right?
But how were you supposed to know that one measly party—just one event—would change everything?
It wasn’t even a big deal at first. Just a typical Friday night, with music blasting, lights flashing, and everyone packed together in some house that barely fit the crowd. You had told yourself you’d just go for a bit, maybe chat with some friends, and leave before things got too chaotic.
When you arrived, you decided to go get a drink first, something to ease your nerves. You weren’t exactly the type to jump into a party scene, so you figured a little liquid courage wouldn’t hurt. You made your way to the kitchen, and scanned the counter for something that would do the trick. You found a bottle of something strong, poured yourself a generous amount, and started nursing it as you made your way through the house, trying to find a familiar face in the crowd.
The music was louder now, almost deafening, and the air smelled like a mix of cheap cologne, sweat, and the faint scent of pizza. The people around you were lost in their own little worlds—laughing, dancing, talking—but you were searching for someone you knew.
Your search didn’t take long before you spotted a group of people you knew—friends from class, a few people you’d hung out with before. You made your way toward them, grateful for the distraction, and they welcomed you with smiles and waves. You could feel the tension in your body start to loosen as you joined in, taking a sip from your drink and laughing along with their jokes.
You stayed with them for a while, catching up on small talk, sipping your drink more leisurely. The conversation shifted from one topic to another—school, upcoming plans, random gossip about who was dating who—until eventually, the music started pulling everyone onto the dance floor. You found yourself swept along with the crowd, the beat of the song pounding through the floor and vibrating up your spine as you moved with the rhythm, the alcohol in your system giving you a little extra confidence.
It was fun, for a while. You lost yourself in the music, and you could feel the tension slip away with each step you took, each beat you moved to, until everything felt… easy.
Then, suddenly, you felt strong arms around your waist, pulling you close, a warmth pressing against your back. It took a split second for the reality to sink in, but you already knew who it was based on the familiar scent of cologne that filled your senses. You didn’t have to look to be sure, but you turned your head anyway, and as expected, there he was.
Heeseung.
He was right behind you, holding you effortlessly, his grip strong yet gentle as he matched the rhythm of the music with you. His chest pressed against your back, making your breath catch for a moment.
You could feel his chin rest lightly on your shoulder, his breath warm against your skin, and despite every part of you telling yourself to pull away, to keep the distance you’d worked so hard to maintain, something inside you didn’t want to.
For a brief moment, you forgot to question it all. You forgot the reasons you kept pushing him away, the doubts you had about what he truly wanted.
And when he leaned close, his voice low and steady, you felt your resolve begin to crumble as his lips just brushed your ear. "You look so good," he murmured, the sound of his voice sending a shiver down your spine. "Dancing like that, looking so tempting."
The words were playful, but there was something in the tone that made it clear he wasn’t just joking. You could feel the weight of his gaze on the back of your neck.
For a moment, you felt dizzy—not just from the alcohol, but from his proximity, the way he had you caught in his orbit, unwilling to let go.
"You’re driving me crazy," he whispered, his grip on your waist tightening just slightly as if to remind you of how close he was. The teasing had a bite now and you couldn’t help but wonder if he was testing you, seeing how far he could push.
And God did he push.
Heeseung’s fingers brushed lightly against your waist, sending a ripple of heat through you. "You know," he said, his tone softer now, almost a whisper, "you’re not making it easy for me to behave tonight."
You swallowed hard, trying to ignore the way your body reacted to his every move, every word. But it was useless—he was too close, too overwhelming, and you couldn’t think straight.
When you finally found your voice, it came out quieter than you intended. "Maybe you’ve had a little too much to drink, Heeseung," you said, hoping to inject some distance, even though your own voice betrayed how unsteady you felt.
He chuckled softly, the sound vibrating against your back. "Maybe," he admitted, and you could hear the smirk in his tone. "But don’t act like you’re not enjoying this."
You turned your head slightly, just enough to catch a glimpse of him out of the corner of your eye. His gaze was locked on you, dark and intense.
"I’m not—" you started, but the words caught in your throat as he leaned in even closer, his lips brushing the shell of your ear.
"You’re not what?" he murmured, his voice low and coaxing, daring you to finish your sentence.
You hated how your body betrayed you, how your heart raced, how you couldn’t seem to pull away, even though every logical part of your brain screamed at you to step back. But the warmth of his arms and the way he looked at you as if you were the only person in the room—it was all too much.
For once, you let yourself linger, not pulling away from his hold, not giving him the usual pushback. He noticed immediately, his smirk growing as if he had won some unspoken game between you two.
“You’re quiet tonight,” Heeseung said, his tone teasing but soft. His fingers traced small circles against your hip, his other hand resting lightly at your waist. “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, huh?”
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at your lips. “Maybe I’m just too tired to deal with your nonsense.”
“Oh, nonsense, huh?” he said with a mock-wounded expression, leaning closer, his lips hovering dangerously close to your skin. “Careful, or you might hurt my feelings.”
“I think you’ll survive,” you shot back, tilting your head to glance at him. But the way his gaze locked onto yours made your breath hitch.
He laughed, the sound low and warm, as he kept still. “You’re enjoying this,” he murmured, the words brushing against your ear. “Admit it.”
You didn’t respond right away, instead letting the music carry you both. There was something about this that felt different tonight. Maybe it was the way he wasn’t pushing too hard, wasn’t making this feel like a game. Or maybe it was just the way you let yourself relax for once, let yourself enjoy his attention without overthinking it.
“And if I am?” you said finally, your voice quieter than you intended, but steady enough to hold his gaze.
Heeseung’s grin widened, his confidence shining through. “Then I guess I’ll just have to keep doing whatever I’m doing,” he said, his voice full of promise.
You scoffed lightly, shaking your head, trying to brush him off, but he wasn’t having it. “Oh, don’t act so tough,” he teased, “I know I’m getting to you.”
You rolled your eyes, stepping back just enough to put some space between you, but Heeseung wasn’t letting you off the hook that easily. He followed, closing the gap again, his movements unhurried. “Running away already?” he said, his tone mockingly hurt.
“I’m not running,” you shot back, crossing your arms in front of you, though the small smile threatening to form on your lips betrayed you.
“Uh-huh,” he said, clearly not convinced. He reached out, gently tugging at one of your hands, his pouty expression exaggerated to the point of being ridiculous. “Don’t be mean, baby. I was just starting to enjoy myself.”
You let out a laugh despite yourself, shaking your head again. “I’m not your baby , you know that right?”
“But here you are,” he replied smoothly, the grin returning to his lips. “Still talking to me, still letting me hold you like I belong to you. Makes me think you don’t hate this as much as you pretend.”
You wanted to argue, to push him away again, but before you could, Heeseung pulled you closer once more. “Tell me to stop,” he said quietly, “if you really want me to stop, I will.”
The words caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didn’t know what to say, but you didn’t want him to stop. You couldn’t say it either. And he noticed.
Instead of gloating, though, his grin softened into an almost shy smile. “That’s what I thought,” he murmured, his hand squeezing yours gently before letting it go, as if to remind you that you were the one in control, even if it didn’t feel like it right now.
“Don’t think this means I’m giving in,” you said, trying to regain some ground, but the way he was looking at you made it hard to sound convincing.
“Sure, sure,” he replied, his smirk returning. “But I’ll take it as a win anyway.”
You rolled your eyes at him, a playful smirk curling on your lips. Leaning in just enough so only he could hear, you whispered, your voice teasing, “Maybe you should work a little harder if you want to win me over pretty boy.”
Before he could respond, you pulled back and walked off toward the kitchen, swaying your hips just enough to make a point and you felt a surge of satisfaction when you glanced over your shoulder.
Heeseung stood frozen in place, his expression both shocked and in disbelief. His mouth hung open slightly, his eyes wide as he processed your words and the sudden shift. For once, it seemed like you had left him speechless—a rarity that made your grin widen.
You turned back around, hiding your amusement as you reached the kitchen and poured yourself another drink.
A few seconds passed, and you felt it—the unmistakable weight of his gaze burning into your back. Heeseung wasn’t one to give up easily, and you knew you’d just ignited a fire in him. It wasn’t a question of if he’d come after you, but when.
You took a sip of your drink, savoring the moment, and braced yourself for whatever Heeseung was planning. You barely had any time to react before you felt Heeseung’s presence behind you. His body pressed against your back, his warmth seeping through your clothes as his arms caged you in on either side of the counter. His hands gripped the edge, locking you in place.
A low, frustrated groan escaped his lips, brushing against your ear and sending a shiver down your spine. “You’re really going to do me like that?” he murmured, his voice laced with mock pain.
You tilted your head slightly, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye, unable to keep the grin from spreading across your face. “Do you like what?” you asked innocently, swirling your drink in your hand as if you weren’t trapped.
Heeseung chuckled, a deep, throaty sound that made your stomach flip. “Walking away like that,” he said, leaning in closer until his lips almost brushed the curve of your jaw. “Whispering things you know are going to drive me crazy, and then just leaving me standing there like an idiot.”
You giggled as you leaned back slightly, your head resting against his shoulder. “You looked cute like that,” you teased, your tone dripping with playful defiance. “Maybe I should do it more often.”
“Cute?” he echoed, his voice dropping an octave as his grip on the counter tightened. “I’ll show you cute.”
Before you could respond, Heeseung’s lips were so close to your ear that you could feel the heat of his breath. “You’re trouble, you know that?” he said, his tone softer now, though still playful. “But it’s fine. I like trouble.”
You couldn’t help but laugh again, your shoulders shaking slightly as you set your drink down on the counter. “You’re so dramatic, Heeseung,” you said, turning your head just enough to meet his gaze.
Heeseung’s eyes locked onto yours, the grin on his face softening into something more tempting. “Dramatic, huh?” he murmured, “maybe. But you can’t tell me you don’t like it.”
You opened your mouth to reply, but the words caught in your throat as he leaned in closer, his nose almost brushing yours. “I think you like the attention,” he continued, his tone smug as his lips curved into that infuriating smirk. “You wouldn’t keep me guessing if you didn’t.”
You rolled your eyes, trying to keep your composure despite the rapid thudding of your heart. “Guessing? Please,” you scoffed, tilting your chin up slightly, refusing to back down. “You’re the one who keeps showing up, Heeseung. Not me.”
“And yet,” he countered smoothly, “you haven’t walked away yet. If you really weren’t interested, you wouldn’t still be here. With me.”
You narrowed your eyes at him, even as a smile tugged at the corners of your mouth. “Maybe I’m just enjoying watching you make a fool of yourself.”
“Is that right?” he said, his voice dipping, playful but challenging. He leaned in even closer, so close that his lips were barely a breath away from yours. “Careful, baby, or you might end up falling for me instead.”
His confidence was maddening, but it was that same confidence that made your pulse race.
You tilted your head slightly, meeting his gaze with a raised brow. “Falling for you?” you repeated, your voice steady even as your heart betrayed you. “Don’t flatter yourself, Heeseung.”
He chuckled softly, the sound low and warm as his hand left the counter to lightly graze your hip, his fingers lingering just enough to make you aware of every single nerve in your body. “Oh, I’m not flattering myself,” he murmured, his tone dripping with amusement. “I’m just calling it how I see it.”
You rolled your eyes, a soft laugh escaping your lips. “You’ve got some nerve,” you said, shaking your head as you turned away from him.
His eyes following your every move as you picked up your drink again. “And you’ve got some walls,” he shot back.
You paused, glancing back at him as you took a sip of your drink. “Maybe they’re there for a reason,” you replied, your tone light but pointed.
Heeseung leaned back slightly, crossing his arms over his chest as he studied you. “Yeah, but the thing about walls?” he said, tilting his head with a grin. “They’re meant to be climbed.”
You side-eyed him, the faintest smile tugging at your lips as you raised your glass to take another sip. “Try all you want mountain climber.”
Before he could come up with a response, you smoothly stepped away, moving around the kitchen counter to put some distance between you. His brows furrowed slightly in surprise, the sudden shift catching him off guard.
“Hey, wait a second,” he called after you, quickly sliding around the counter in an attempt to follow. The way he moved—quick but a little clumsy, as if he hadn’t expected you to slip away so easily—made you chuckle to yourself.
“You’re gonna have to try harder than that,” you said over your shoulder, your tone full of challenge as you leaned casually against the far end of the counter, nursing your drink.
Heeseung stopped on the other side, his hands gripping the edge of the counter as he tilted his head. “Oh, so now we’re playing games?” he asked, clearly in disbelief.
“You started it,” you shot back, taking another sip and meeting his gaze head-on.
His eyes narrowed slightly as if accepting the challenge. “Fine,” he said, “but don’t be mad when I win.”
“Win?” you repeated, raising a brow at him. “Pretty confident for someone who just got left behind.”
That earned a laugh from him, and in one swift motion, he stepped around the counter, closing the gap between you. “Left behind?” he echoed, his tone playful as he leaned down slightly, his face closer to yours. “Nah. I’m right where I need to be.”
Your breath hitched for the briefest moment, but you quickly masked it with another sip of your drink, refusing to let him see how much his persistence was getting to you.
Heeseung’s smirk widened when you began moving around the counter again, and without missing a beat, he mirrored your steps, chasing after you. “Oh, you think you’re clever, huh?” he teased, his tone light as his eyes tracked your every move.
“You’ll have to be faster than that,” you shot back, a playful laugh escaping your lips as you darted around the other side.
His hands hovered over the counter, ready to cut you off, but you were quicker, slipping just out of reach. The look of mock frustration on his face was priceless, and you couldn’t help but grin at your small victory.
“Alright, alright,” he said, holding his hands up for a moment as if calling a truce. But you weren’t buying it—not for a second.
When he lunged, you were ready, spinning on your heel and darting out of the kitchen entirely. “Nice try!” you called over your shoulder, weaving your way back toward the dance floor, the thumping bass and flashing lights swallowing you up.
You could hear him groan behind you, the sound half exasperated, half amused. “You’re really gonna make me work for this, huh?”
You didn’t answer, slipping into the crowd and letting the press of people conceal you. It was easy to lose him in the chaos, and when you glanced back over your shoulder, you caught a glimpse of him standing near the edge of the dance floor, scanning the crowd with a furrowed brow.
For a moment, you just watched him. The way he ran a hand through his hair, clearly trying to spot you, made your chest tighten unexpectedly. But you shook the feeling off quickly, turning back to the music and letting yourself have fun.
The crowd seemed to shift and swirl, pulling you deeper into the dance floor. For a moment, you felt untouchable—lost in the freedom of the moment.
But that feeling didn’t last long. You could still feel him, even if you couldn’t see him. And then, just when you thought you’d successfully slipped away, a familiar voice cut through the noise, low and right near your ear.
“Thought you could run away from me?”
You turned your head sharply, only to find Heeseung standing there, a sly grin on his face. His hair was slightly mussed, and there was a faint flush on his cheeks, probably from weaving through the crowd to find you.
“How’d you—” you started, but he interrupted with a chuckle.
“You really think I’d give up that easily?” he asked, his tone almost incredulous. “I told you, I’m right where I need to be.”
You rolled your eyes, though the corner of your lips tugged upward. “Maybe you’re just a little too determined,” you said, stepping back slightly, but he followed your movement effortlessly.
“Or maybe you like being chased,” he countered, his voice smooth as he matched your pace.
You opened your mouth to retort, but he caught your hand, gently spinning you back toward him, his movements seamless with the music. It was so smooth, so unexpected, that you didn’t even think to pull away. “Caught you,” he murmured, his voice low as his eyes locked onto yours.
You raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the way your heart was pounding. “I let you catch me,” you replied.
“Keep telling yourself that,” he answered as he pulled you a little closer.
The space between you vanished, and for a moment, you were acutely aware of everything—his hand on your waist, his body, his gaze. It was dizzying, but you didn’t pull away. Instead, you stayed there, caught in the moment, wondering how on earth he always managed to get under your skin like this.
Heeseung began to sway with you to the music, his hands resting lightly on your waist, guiding your movements with an ease that felt far too natural. You told yourself it didn’t mean anything. It was just dancing, just a moment. And yet, you didn’t stop him. You let him lead, let him pull you closer, until his forehead was nearly brushing yours.
But then you noticed something. The way his steps were deliberate, not just moving to the beat but steering you. Slowly, subtly, his touch guided you backward through the crowd.
Your brow furrowed as realization dawned. Heeseung wasn’t just dancing. He had a plan.
“You’re sneaky, you know that?” you muttered, narrowing your eyes as you glanced over your shoulder and saw the wall creeping closer.
Heeseung’s grin turned wicked, a spark of mischief lighting up his face. “Sneaky? Me?” he asked, feigning innocence, though the way his hands tightened ever so slightly on your waist betrayed him. “Yes, you,” you shot back, even as your back brushed against the cool surface of the wall. He leaned in, his voice low and teasing. “Can you blame me? You make it so hard to keep my distance.”
You rolled your eyes, though your pulse betrayed you, hammering in your chest as his gaze locked onto yours.
His gaze never left yours for a second. The world around you seemed to fade away as he leaned in just the slightest bit closer, his chest rising and falling faster with each breath. You could feel the heat of his body so close to yours, could feel the tension between you, thick and heavy.
He glanced down at your lips, then back up to your eyes, the look in his gaze unreadable. It was almost like he was testing the air between you, measuring whether you’d pull away or lean in. His hands on your waist holding you in place as if he knew you wouldn’t make a move. His breathing had picked up now, shallow and just a little shaky, and for a brief moment, you wondered if he was just as affected by this as you were.
“Stop looking at me like that,” you whispered, though you knew your voice was too soft to carry any real force. The words felt weak even as they left your lips, because you knew you weren’t really trying to push him away.
He chuckled softly, the sound deep and low, as if savoring the moment. “Like what?” he asked.
You didn’t answer. You couldn’t—because the answer was already in the way your heart was pounding, the way your breath hitched every time he got a little closer.
And then, without warning, he leaned in just a fraction more, his lips hovering so close to yours that you could feel the heat radiating from them, but he didn’t make the move. He was waiting. Testing.
You both seemed to be holding your breath.
Just as you were about to say something, the world shifted unexpectedly. A figure stumbled into Heeseung from behind, knocking into him, and before either of you could react, the person’s drink splashed all over you. You gasped as the cold liquid drenched your outfit, your heart sinking as you saw the mess, the dark stain had spread across the fabric, leaving a damp, sticky trail. “Are you kidding me?” you groaned, trying to wipe it off, but it only made it worse.
Heeseung, who had been caught off guard by the collision, quickly turned around. His brows furrowed with frustration, but his gaze softened when he saw the mess on your clothes. Without missing a beat, he pushed the person who had bumped into him away with a quick but firm shove. “Watch where you’re going!” he snapped. The drunk person mumbled an apology, clearly embarrassed, but Heeseung didn’t seem to care. His attention was on you now.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his hand brushing against your arm as he looked you over.
You just sighed, wiping your shirt, but it was clear you weren’t getting anywhere. “This is great,” you muttered, more to yourself than anyone else, “I didn’t even want to be here tonight, and now this…”
Heeseung didn’t let you dwell on it for long. “Come on,” he said, taking your hand in a way that was surprisingly gentle for all the tension you’d felt earlier. “Let’s get you cleaned up. There’s a bathroom down the hall.”
You didn’t argue, allowing him to guide you through the crowd, his hand on yours was warm, and even though you were frustrated, there was something comforting in the way he took charge.
When you reached the bathroom, he opened the door for you, ushering you inside with a soft “After you,” before making sure the door was securely closed behind you. The bathroom was quieter, and the air felt colder, but it was a welcome change from the chaos outside.
“Sit down, I’ll grab you some paper towels,” he said, motioning to the counter as he quickly moved toward the sink.
You sat down on the edge, trying to assess the damage, but the sticky feeling of the drink on your skin made it hard to focus. Heeseung was quick, his movements efficient as he grabbed a handful of paper towels and wet them under the faucet.
“You’re really going to make me clean up after you now?” you teased, trying to lighten the mood, though there was still a hint of irritation in your voice.
Heeseung didn’t reply right away. Instead, he stepped closer, his fingers brushing yours as he handed you the damp towels. His gaze softened as he looked at you. “I’m not making you do anything,” he said quietly, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Just trying to help.”
You glanced at him, surprised by the gentle way he was treating the situation. You took the damp towels from his hands, still a little flustered by how close he was standing, how his gaze was focused on you with such intent.
“I didn’t ask for help,” you muttered, not in an angry way but more out of habit, the natural instinct to push away when things got too close, too personal.
He smiled, a knowing glint in his eyes. “I know. But that’s never stopped me before, has it?”
You opened your mouth to retort, but the words didn’t come. You couldn’t find the right response. Instead, you just looked at him, your heart doing that erratic thing it always did when he was this close.
Heeseung seemed to notice your hesitation, his smile softening. “You don’t have to push me away every time, you know,” he said gently, his voice almost too sincere.
You blinked, caught off guard. But before you could respond, he stepped back, giving you space, though his eyes never left yours. “I’ll wait outside,” he said quietly, his voice shifting back to its usual tone.“Take your time.”
You nodded, not trusting yourself to say anything else.
Heeseung gave you one last lingering look before stepping out of the bathroom, the door clicking softly behind him. As soon as he was gone, you exhaled a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, your heart still racing in your chest. You quickly went to work cleaning yourself up, though the mess on your clothes was much harder to fix.
Your thoughts were spinning. There was something about the way Heeseung was acting tonight, you couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but there was definitely something there, and it made your stomach twist in ways.
You ran a hand through your hair, trying to collect yourself. Why did he have this effect on you? You couldn’t figure it out, but the longer you stood there in the bathroom, the more confused you felt.
After a few more minutes, you gave up trying to fix the mess entirely. It was too late for that. Instead, you grabbed your things and stepped out of the bathroom. As soon as you entered the hallway, you spotted Heeseung standing by the door, his posture relaxed but his eyes immediately locking onto yours. “Well?” he asked, cocking his head slightly as he gave you a once-over. “Better?”
You couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, much better,” you replied, trying to act nonchalant, but you could feel your heartbeat quicken again under his scrutiny.
He gave a small nod, his eyes never leaving yours. “Good. You look… good.” There was a hesitation before the words left his mouth, as though he wasn’t entirely sure how to phrase them.
You caught it, and for the first time tonight, you didn’t immediately push back. Instead, you simply looked at him, unsure of what was happening.
Wait.
You suddenly felt a strange sense of déjà vu wash over you. The way he looked at you, the way he was standing there waiting for you, felt familiar, like it was something you had experienced before.
Your mind wandered back to a memory from when you were younger, one that you hadn’t thought about in ages. You were just a child, maybe eight or nine, playing in the park with Heeseung not too far away. You’d been running around, laughing with the other kids when some clumsy little boy—one of your classmates—spilled his drink all over you. You’d been so upset, the sticky liquid ruining your favorite shirt, and you could feel tears threatening to spill.
But then, out of nowhere, there was Heeseung. He hadn’t hesitated for a second, not like some of the other kids who were too busy laughing or ignoring you. He’d been sitting nearby, playing with a figurine in the grass, but the moment he saw you, he dropped his toys without a second thought. Without saying a word, he had stood up, walked over to you, and gently grabbed your hand.
“Don’t worry,” he’d said with that soft, comforting tone only he had, “I’ll help you clean up.”
He had led you straight to the bathroom of the park’s little concession stand, where he carefully grabbed paper towels and dabbed at your shirt, his face set in a look of determination. You remembered feeling embarrassed, but somehow his presence made everything feel better.
And now, here you were, years later, with him standing in front of you again, doing the same thing—helping you, without hesitation. It made you smile softly to yourself, the memory tugging at your heart in ways you weren’t sure how to explain.
Heeseung, noticing the smile tugging at your lips, raised an eyebrow in playful curiosity. “What’s on your mind?”
You shook your head, trying to hide the faint blush creeping onto your cheeks. “Just… thinking about something,” you said, your voice quieter than usual.
He didn’t push, simply giving you a small smile, as though he understood without needing any further explanation.
Before you could think too much about it, Heeseung suddenly moved with a surprising confidence, his hand finding your waist and gently pulling you along with him. The sudden shift startled you for a moment, but the warmth of his hand against your side made your breath hitch slightly.
“You look like you need another drink,” he said, his voice low, but playful, as he guided you through the crowded hallway and toward the kitchen. He left you no time to protest, and you found yourself following him without much resistance. You’d barely processed the familiar feeling of his touch when you were already in the kitchen, the sound of music and chatter fading slightly as you both entered the quieter space. Heeseung let go of your waist once you were in the kitchen, but he still stood close.
You looked up at him, meeting his eyes as he turned to the counter, rifling through the bottles of alcohol, though his gaze never fully left you.
"Something strong this time?" he asked, his tone teasing but with a hint of genuine care, as though he wanted to make sure you were really okay. "Or do you want to take it easy?"
You were still caught off guard by the way he had pulled you along, the way he’d moved without hesitation, without waiting for permission.
"Maybe just something light," you replied, trying to play it cool, even though he was making it difficult to focus on anything else.
Heeseung worked quickly, his movements smooth as he reached for the bottle, his back was turned to you. But you couldn’t stop watching him—how his muscles shifted under the fabric of his shirt, how good he looked.
Heeseung eventually finished the drink and handed it to you, his fingers brushing against yours again as you took the glass. For a second, you both stood there, neither one of you saying anything. It wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t entirely comfortable either. It was that kind of silence where it felt like something was about to happen, but neither of you were sure what.
“So, what now?” you asked, trying to break the silence, but you could feel your heart pounding in your chest as you spoke.
Heeseung took a step closer to you, his eyes never leaving yours. "Now," he said, "we get back to enjoying the night."
You swallowed, suddenly aware of how close he was. "Right," you said, your voice a little shakier than you intended, but you quickly recovered, giving him a small smile. "Let’s see if I can actually make it through the night without getting drenched in anything else."
Heeseung’s lips curled into a grin, and he chuckled softly. "I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen again," he said, his tone playful but with an undertone of sincerity. He reached out and gently took your hand, his fingers brushing against yours.
You let him lead you back into the party, the music louder now, the crowd thicker. Heeseung didn’t let go of your hand, and you found yourself walking alongside him through the house, feeling uncertain.
✰ ✰ ✰
Somewhere during the night, you had lost sight of Heeseung. He had been dragged away by his friends, caught up in the crowd, and never returned after that. At first, it felt like a strange absence, the lingering sense of him still there even if he wasn't. But after a while, you pushed it aside, deciding it was fine.
You found yourself moving through the party, chatting with friends, laughing at jokes, and enjoying yourself. And as the night went on, you slipped into the comfort of familiar faces, people you could talk to normally. You were glad for the chance to just have fun, to forget for a moment the heat that always seemed to follow whenever Heeseung was around. You were fine without him, right?
You decided to step outside for a breath of fresh air. The noise and chaos inside had started to make you feel lightheaded, and the stuffy heat of the house wasn’t helping. A little solitude would do you good, you thought.
The cool air hit your skin as you stepped out into the backyard, a quiet escape from the party. You leaned against the outer wall, looking up at the night sky. The stars twinkled faintly above, and for a moment, you let the silence settle around you. It was peaceful, the kind of calm you needed after the madness inside. You closed your eyes for a moment, feeling the chill of the night on your skin, and took a deep breath.
What you didn’t know was that someone was watching you from the shadows, standing just far enough away not to be seen. The shape of a figure, leaning against the corner of the house, observing you with quiet intensity.
The moment stretched on, the backyard still and quiet, until you felt a presence shift behind you. A movement you couldn’t quite place, and before you could turn around to see who it was, you felt the brush of someone’s body so close to yours that it made you freeze.
You slowly turned your head, your breath catching in your throat, and found yourself face to face with Heeseung. His lips were mere inches from your ear as he leaned in, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him. But something was off.
His usually sharp gaze was a little hazy, his eyes unfocused as he smiled at you—though it didn’t reach the intensity of his usual teasing grin. He looked almost… detached. Out of it.
And then the smell hit you—a sharp, pungent scent of weed mixed with the alcohol. It hit you like a wave, and you realized just how much he'd been indulging tonight.
"Heeseung?" you murmured, taking a step back instinctively, your heart picking up speed as you watched him sway slightly, his breath coming out slower than usual.
He seemed to snap out of his daze for a moment, his eyes clearing slightly as he blinked at you. "Hmm?" His voice was low, almost lazy, and there was a softness to it that you weren’t used to hearing.
You studied him for a moment, his breath still tinged with the unmistakable haze of the night’s indulgence. He wasn't himself—at least not the playful Heeseung you knew. "Are you okay?" you asked cautiously, unsure how to navigate this new version of him standing so close.
He seemed to hesitate for a moment before a slow, almost dreamy smile curled up on his lips. "Yeah, just needed a break too. The noise gets... loud. You know how it is."
He swayed again, his hand coming up to rest on the wall near you, his face inches from yours.
You stood still, your heart racing as you took in the unexpected sight of him like this. “Hey,” you said softly, your voice steadier than you felt. “Maybe you should head back inside.”
He chuckled softly, but it lacked its usual spark. Instead, it was drawn out and almost tired. “Nah,” he muttered, his breath warm against your skin. “I’m fine... just needed a minute.” His fingers brushed your arm lightly as if trying to keep himself steady.
He didn’t back away, though, and neither did you.
You were unsure what to say next, unsure of your next move. "You’re making this... hard," you finally whispered, uncertain whether you were talking about the situation or him.
Heeseung smiled, but this time it was slow, almost seductive, like he was savoring the moment. “Maybe I like it that way,” he murmured, his voice almost a growl. He leaned just a little closer, his breath mingling with yours.
Despite everything, despite all the confusion, you couldn’t stop the way your heart pounded. Heeseung had always been a game you couldn’t quite figure out, but right now, you were starting to wonder if maybe it was a game you didn’t want to win.
As he leaned in further, you had to make a decision: pull away, or let yourself fall into whatever it was that had been brewing between the two of you.
Before you could even make a decision, he made the decision for you. His lips parted, and he murmured a low, breathy compliment against your ear, his voice sending a shiver down your spine. “You look so beautiful baby,” he said, and there was a sincerity in his tone that cut through the haze. But before you could respond, his hand shot up to grip the side of your neck, his thumb pressing lightly against your skin, holding you in place. The other hand moved to your waist, pulling you flush against him.
Then, without warning, he kissed you. Hard. Hungry. His lips crashing against yours as if you were the air he needed to breathe, like this moment was the only thing that mattered.
You gasped into the kiss, caught off guard by the intensity of it. Heeseung’s mouth was possessive, eager, like he couldn’t get enough of you. He kissed you with a desperation that sent a rush of heat straight to your body, his hands pulling you closer, the pressure of his grip firm. It felt like everything had exploded in that moment, every feeling you’d been pushing away suddenly pouring out in a single, stolen kiss.
Your heart hammered in your chest, and even though every part of you knew this wasn’t how you expected things to go, you couldn’t bring yourself to stop it. The way he kissed you—like you were the last thing he’d ever touch—was overwhelming, and for the first time, you let yourself surrender to it.
His lips were intoxicating, and as he pulled you closer, you could feel the intensity in every movement, every press of his body against yours. The kiss deepened, more frantic now, as if neither of you could get enough. The feeling of him—so desperate, so needy—was something you never expected from Heeseung, and yet it was exactly what you found yourself craving.
You tried to stay grounded, to remind yourself of who he was, of all the walls you’d carefully built between you, but with each second, they seemed to crumble. His hands moved to your back, pulling you in as his kiss grew more fevered, his breathing erratic as he let out soft groans against your lips.
You couldn’t help but respond, your own hands rising to clutch at his shirt, your fingers digging into the fabric as if to keep him anchored to you, like the very act of touching him would stop this moment from slipping away. Heeseung’s body was solid against yours, and despite the confusion that still buzzed in the back of your mind, you couldn’t deny how badly you wanted this—wanted him.
His breath hitched as you pulled him even closer, you could feel the way his body seemed to tremble slightly as he held you in his arms, groaning lowly, the sound vibrating against your lips as he used one arm to brace himself against the wall, the other pulling you even closer, if that was even possible. His lips were desperate, claiming, his breathing heavy as it mixed with yours.
Your hands moved without thought, one gripping the back of his shirt, the other winding into his hair, tugging him even closer. He let out another low groan, the sound so needy it sent a shiver down your spine. Heeseung’s hand at your waist tightened, as if he was trying to merge your bodies into one.
Every part of you seemed to melt under his touch, all that mattered in that moment was the way he felt against you, the way his lips moved with yours, the way his hands seemed to be exploring every inch of your body. His lips moved with desperation, and each breathless kiss made it harder to remember why you had held back for so long.
But then, just as the kiss deepened again, your mind caught up with you. You could feel the weight of it—the gravity of what was happening. The familiar warning signs, the confusion, the uncertainty, all came rushing back to the surface.
You hesitated for a moment, your hands gripping his hair tightly, your chest rising and falling in quick breaths, trying to regain some semblance of control. Heeseung, sensing the shift, finally pulled back, his forehead resting against yours, both of you panting softly.
“Are you okay?” he whispered, his voice raspy and gentle, as if checking to see if you were still with him in that moment.
You pulled back slightly, your chest rising and falling rapidly as you tried to gather your thoughts, but your mind was still clouded by the rush of the moment. "We... we shouldn't be doing this," you murmured, your voice shaky, feeling the weight of the situation. "You're drunk, Heeseung. This isn't you."
Heeseung blinked slowly, his eyes still heavy with that lazy, almost dazed look as he played with the strands of your hair, his fingers brushing gently against your scalp. He tilted his head slightly, giving you that smile—the one that always made your heart flutter, even in the most confusing of times.
He leaned in just a little closer, his breath warm against your cheek, and he spoke softly, his voice sincere "Even if I wasn't drunk," he said, his lips curling into a slow smile, "I’d still do this." His eyes locked onto yours, the haze in them making his gaze feel even more intense. "Because you're you. A pretty girl I've wanted for years."
You felt your breath catch in your throat, the heat of his words curling around you like a blanket, and you couldn’t help the way your heart skipped a beat. His hand on your hair moved down to gently cup your face, his thumb tracing the curve of your cheek. "This... this is unforgettable. And I’d do it over and over again, no matter what state I’m in."
You were speechless for a moment, but you knew he was being honest, even if his current state made it hard to fully trust his intentions.
"But...," you started, still unsure, trying to hold onto your reason, "this isn't the right time, Heeseung. We both know that."
Heeseung’s lazy smile didn’t falter, though there was a longing in his eyes somthing you hadn't seen before. He slowly moved his thumb down, brushing lightly over your lips before leaning in again, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Maybe not the right time," he said, his lips nearly brushing against yours once more. "But you’ve always been worth the wait."
Heeseung hesitated for a moment, his hand still cradling your face as if silently asking for permission. Then, he leaned in, placing a soft, tentative peck on your lips. It was gentle and when you didn’t pull away, he did it again, this time lingering a little longer. Each kiss felt like a question, and with every unspoken answer, his confidence grew.
The next kiss wasn’t as restrained. It was deeper, needier, as though the small taste he’d gotten wasn’t enough. His lips moved against yours with increasing urgency, quickly unraveling into something messier. His hand on your waist tightened, pulling you flush against him, while his other hand moved to cradle the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair.
The kisses turned sloppy, his control slipping with every passing second. His breath came heavier, mingling with yours as he tilted his head, deepening the kiss. He groaned softly against your lips, the sound vibrating through you, making your knees feel weak.
You couldn’t help but respond, your hands moving to grip his shoulders, holding onto him like he was the only thing keeping you grounded.
Heeseung broke away just briefly, as he gasped for air, his lips swollen and glistening. “You don’t know,” he murmured, his voice rough and filled with desperation. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.” Before you could respond, he captured your lips again, his kisses feverish, like he was making up for all the time he’d spent waiting. His body pressed you more firmly against the wall, as he completely lost himself in the moment, his body fitting against yours like a puzzle piece.
You tried to catch your breath, your head spinning from it all, but Heeseung wasn’t giving you a chance to think. His lips trailed down from yours, brushing along your jaw and down to your neck, where he placed hot, open-mouthed kisses that sent a shiver through your entire body. “Heeseung,” you managed to whisper, your voice shaky. You weren’t sure what you were trying to say—stop or don’t stop.
“Say my name again,” he murmured against your neck, his voice low and raspy. He placed another kiss just below your ear, his breath hot and tantalizing. “I love the way it sounds coming from you.”
You didn’t answer because the way he was looking at you left you speechless. His lips were swollen from the kisses, his hair slightly messy, and there was something in his gaze that you hadn’t seen before. “Heeseung,” you whispered again, softer this time, your hand reaching up to touch his face. The moment your fingers brushed his cheek, he leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed for a second. When they opened again, there was a softness there that made your heart ache.
Heeseung’s lips found yours again, capturing them in a kiss so deep, so consuming, that it left you breathless. You could feel the way his fingers trembled slightly as they slid up your sides. One hand settled on the small of your back, keeping you firmly pressed against him, while the other moved to cradle your jaw, tilting your head just enough.
He groaned low in his throat, a sound that sent a shiver down your spine as his lips parted, inviting you to deepen the kiss. The way his tongue brushed against yours was dizzying, leaving your knees weak and your mind spinning. You responded instinctively, your hands moving up to tangle in his hair, pulling him even closer.
Heeseung’s breathing was heavy, uneven, as if he couldn’t catch his breath but didn’t want to stop. His fingers slipped beneath the hem of your shirt, brushing against your skin in a way that made your stomach flutter. It felt like he was memorizing the feel of you, the taste of you, the way you fit perfectly against him.
Heeseung’s lips suddenly left yours, trailing a line of hot, open-mouthed kisses down your jaw and onto your neck. “You don’t even know,” he murmured, his words slurred slightly but full of emotion. “How long I’ve wanted this… wanted you. God, you’re all I ever think about.” His lips grazed your collarbone, grounding you as he leaned his full weight into you, effectively caging you against the wall.
His rambling continued, each word pouring out like a confession. “I dream about you… about us. It’s always you. No one else even comes close, y’know that? The way you smile, the way you look at me… even when you’re mad at me, I can’t get you out of my head.”
His lips moved lower, pressing kisses along your chest as he spoke, his voice husky and raw. “You’re so beautiful… so perfect. And now you’re here, and I don’t want to let go.”
His words were pure need and desperation, and the way he shielded you with his body only amplified the intensity of the moment. “Tell me you feel it too,” he breathed, his voice breaking slightly. “Tell me I’m not crazy for wanting you this much.”
You were overwhelmed, caught between his touch and his words. Heeseung wasn’t holding back, and as much as you wanted to respond, the only thing you could manage was a shaky exhale, your hands clutching at his shirt to keep yourself steady.
Your voice wavered as you found the courage to speak, breaking through the haze of emotions swirling around you both. “But what about all the other girls, Heeseung?” you asked, your tone softer than you expected. “All the girls you’ve been with? The ones who’ve followed you around, who’ve—” You hesitated, the words getting caught in your throat.
Heeseung froze for a moment, his lips hovering against the curve of your neck, his breathing uneven. His answer was strained. “No one’s like you,” he said, his tone almost pleading. “No one even comes close.”
His hand moved up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing gently over your cheek. “You think any of them matter?” he asked, his voice thick with emotion. “All those girls… they were never you. Never even close to being you. I don’t care about them. I’ve never cared about anyone the way I care about you.”
His lips found your collarbone again, lingering there as he continued. “I’ve yearned for you—God, for so long. You don’t even know what you do to me.” His hand slid down to your hips, gripping you as if to anchor himself. “Every time I see you, it’s like nothing else exists. No one else exists.”
He pulled back slightly, his dark, half-lidded eyes locking onto yours. “I’ll drop them all—every single one. I don’t need anyone else, never did. I just want you.”
Heeseung, ever the gentleman suddenly took you by the hand and led you back inside, away from the prying eyes of the partygoers. With a gentle yet firm grip, he guided you through the bustling crowd, his eyes never leaving yours, as he led your way towards an unoccupied bedroom. Once inside the bedroom, Heeseung closed the door behind you, locking out the world and creating a private haven for the two of you, as he leaned in and captured your lips in a desperate kiss.
You responded to his kiss with equal fervor, your hands finding their way to his broad shoulders, pulling him closer, while Heeseung's hands roamed freely, caressing your back.
Heeseung only pulled back slightly, his chest heaving with heavy breaths before he began to unbutton his shirt, revealing a well-defined torso.
Well this would be a fun night.
It was a fun night... but what ruined it was the fact that Heeseung suddenly seemed to forget who you were. The next few days at school were a complete shift. He avoided you. He didn’t look at you, didn’t talk to you, didn’t even so much as throw a teasing grin your way in the hallways.
No, instead, he went back to his old habits. He laughed and flirted with other girls, his charm as effortless as ever, like nothing had changed. Like you didn’t exist. At. All.
It was maddening.
But the worst part? Watching him smile at those girls with the same ease he once reserved for you, as if you hadn’t been pressed against that wall, that bed, tangled up in his words and his touch. It left a bitter taste in your mouth.
You didn’t know what happened. You wracked your brain for answers, trying to piece together where it all went wrong. But deep down, you should have known. Of course, you should have known.
Heeseung wasn’t the type to stay tethered. He wasn’t the type to settle. He was the type to chase, to get what he wanted, and then move on. And now that he’d tempted you, now that he’d had a taste of your attention, it seemed he’d gone on to the next woman.
Why would you be any different?
The thought made your stomach twist uncomfortably. You weren’t supposed to care. You’d told yourself you wouldn’t let someone like him get to you. But seeing him act as if nothing had happened—as if you were just another moment in his life—stung more than you wanted to admit.
And the worst part? You couldn’t stop thinking about the way he looked at you that night, the way he touched you, the way his words had seemed so genuine. Had it all been a lie? Or had he just changed his mind?
Either way, you weren’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much it bothered you. If he wanted to act like you didn’t exist, you’d do the same. Or at least, you’d try.
And you did try. You really did. Ignoring Heeseung, pretending he was just another face in the crowd—it seemed like the only way to keep yourself sane. And for a while, it felt like it might work. You told yourself you could move on, that you could forget about the way his touch had felt, the way his voice had sounded when he whispered your name.
Yeah, no. You couldn’t.
Not at all.
You realized that the moment you walked by the bleachers and saw a girl perched comfortably on Heeseung’s lap during basketball practice. She laughed at something he said, her hand resting casually on his shoulder. Your stomach churned.
Nope. Moving on wasn’t happening.
And then in the hallways, you would see him leaning against the wall, his signature grin plastered across his face as he shamelessly flirted with other girls. Their giggles echoed in the corridor, and Heeseung would tilt his head, his eyes sparkling like he didn’t have a care in the world.
Yeah, moving on definitely wasn’t in the cards.
Each time you saw him acting like you were meaningless, like the night you’d shared was nothing more than a passing moment, it cut deeper than you wanted to admit.
And yet, despite all of it, despite the ache in your chest and the frustration bubbling under your skin, you couldn’t bring yourself to confront him. What would you even say? That he’d hurt you? That he’d made you believe you were different, only to prove otherwise?
No. You wouldn’t give him that satisfaction. But pretending it didn’t matter? That was turning out to be harder than you ever imagined.
Okay, yeah, pretending it didn’t matter was much harder than you thought. Because now, standing in the doorway of your room, staring at a very intoxicated Heeseung, all of those feelings you were desperately trying to bury came rushing back.
His hair was messy like he’d run his hands through it a million times. His shirt was unbuttoned at the top, revealing the smooth skin of his collarbones, and his belt dangled loosely from his hands like he’d been too distracted—or too far gone—to put it back on properly. The faint smell of alcohol and nicotine wafted off him, making you wrinkle your nose.
This was not how you’d planned to spend your night. You were supposed to be studying, maybe finishing the next episode of that series you were hooked on. A calm night. But of course, Heeseung had to ruin that.
“Heeseung,” you said, crossing your arms and leaning against the doorframe, trying to keep your voice steady, “What are you doing here?”
He blinked at you, his eyes glassy but still managing to hold that familiar spark that made your heart do stupid flips. “I—uh...” He trailed off, his gaze flickering over you like he was trying to figure out what to say.
You raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. “You don’t even know why you’re here, do you?”
“I know why I’m here,” he slurred, leaning heavily against the doorframe. “I just... I wanted to see you.”
You sighed, already feeling the headache forming. “Heeseung, you’re drunk. And not in your right mind. You should go home before you embarrass yourself even more.”
But instead of leaving, he gave you that boyish grin—the one that always made your resolve waver. “Can’t I stay here? Just for a bit?”
“No,” you replied firmly, but even as you said it, you knew it wouldn’t be that simple.
Heeseung’s expression softened, and his voice dropped, almost pleading. “Come on, don’t do this. I... I don’t want to be anywhere else right now.”
You hated how those words tugged at something deep inside you. Why did he always have to show up and mess with your head?
You found yourself hesitating, your hand still on the door, unable to slam it shut in his face, sighing, your hand gripping the edge of the door as you tried to keep your cool. "I can't do this right now, Heeseung," you said, your voice quieter than you intended. "I have too much going on. I'm stressed, and I really don't have the energy for this."
He didn’t back off. Instead, he leaned closer, his breath warm against your skin, sending an involuntary shiver down your spine. His voice was low and teasing, with that same lazy confidence he always seemed to have. "If you're stressed, I can help with that," he murmured. "Play with me a little, and I promise, you'll forget all about it."
You blinked at him, caught off guard by his audacity. “Heeseung—”
“I’m serious,” he interrupted, a small, mischievous smirk playing on his lips. His eyes, hazy but still focused on you, sparkled with that familiar glint that always left you second-guessing yourself. “I’m really good at relieving stress. Just give me a chance.”
Your mouth opened to respond, but no words came out. The sheer gall of him left you momentarily speechless.
Finally, you shook your head, trying to snap yourself out of the moment. "Heeseung, you're drunk. You should just go home and sleep this off before you say something else ridiculous."
He tilted his head, feigning thoughtfulness. “Drunk or not, I’m still right,” he said, his grin widening as he leaned a fraction closer. “But if you really don’t want me here…” He gestured vaguely toward the hallway, though he made no actual move to leave.
You closed your eyes for a brief moment, trying to summon every ounce of patience you had left. “Heeseung,” you said firmly, opening your eyes and meeting his gaze. “I need you to take this seriously. Either go home, or...”
“Or?” he asked, his voice soft but teasing, daring you to finish the sentence.
Your frustration bubbled over as you only glared at him, the sight of his disheveled figure only fueling your anger. "No! Do you have any idea how mad I am at you right now?" you snapped, crossing your arms. "You ignored me for days, Heeseung. Days! You acted like I didn’t exist, like nothing happened, and now you just show up at my door like—like this?"
Heeseung blinked, the lazy smirk faltering slightly, but he didn’t say anything. That only made you angrier. "Do you even know how humiliating it’s been? Watching you flirt with other girls, pretending like what we had meant nothing? And now, you think you can just waltz in here, drunk and out of your mind and what—fix everything with a grin and some smooth words? You don’t get to do that, Heeseung. You don’t get to mess with my head and—"
Before you could finish, Heeseung surged forward, his hands grabbing your cheeks as he pulled you close. His lips crashed against yours with a force that took your breath away, silencing your ramble in an instant.
Your mind went blank, your words evaporating as his warmth enveloped you. His kiss was desperate, almost as if he was trying to convey everything he couldn’t say out loud. One of his hands slid to the back of your neck, holding you in place, while the other stayed firm on your cheek.
You froze, your anger momentarily eclipsed by the intensity of his actions. But then, your hands instinctively pushed against his chest, breaking the kiss as you stepped back, breathless and wide-eyed. “Heeseung, what the hell?” you whispered, your voice shaking, unsure if it was from lingering anger or the way your heart raced in your chest.
“I didn’t know what else to do,” he admitted quietly, his voice hoarse. “You were yelling at me, and I just… I missed you. I couldn’t stay away.”
You stared at him, torn between wanting to scream at him and wanting to pull him back in. “You don’t get to do that,” you said, your voice trembling. “You don’t get to kiss me like that and think it’ll fix everything.”
“I don’t think it fixes anything,” he said softly, his gaze dropping to the floor.
Before you could respond, he took a small step closer, his forehead gently resting against your shoulder. His breath was warm against your neck as he hummed softly, the sound low and almost comforting. He nuzzled against your skin, his movements slow and unhurried, as if he had all the time in the world.
“Heeseung,” you said, your voice strained as you placed your hands on his shoulders, trying to push him away. But he didn’t budge, his larger frame pressing closer as his lips ghosted over the curve of your neck.
“I missed this,” he murmured, the words vibrating against your skin. He pressed a soft, lingering kiss just below your ear, his hand curling gently around your waist to hold you steady.
You tried to push again, but it was weak, half-hearted, especially as his lips found a particularly sensitive spot, sending a shiver down your spine. “Stop it, Heeseung,” you said, but your voice lacked conviction, and he clearly noticed.
He chuckled softly, the sound deep and a little smug. “You’re telling me to stop,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your neck, “but you’re not really trying, are you?”
Your heart raced, torn between the anger still simmering in your chest and the way his touch was making your knees feel like jelly. “Heeseung, this isn’t fair,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
He pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, his expression softer now. “You’re right. It’s not fair. But I don’t know how else to tell you that I’m sorry. That I’ve been a complete idiot. That I can’t stop thinking about you, no matter how hard I try.”
His words caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didn’t know how to respond. But before you could sort through your emotions, he leaned in again, his lips brushing against your neck once more, and you felt yourself faltering.
Heeseung’s movements were subtle at first, his arm tightening slightly around your waist as he guided you further into the house. You didn’t even realize he’d kicked the door closed until you heard the faint click of it shutting.
Your distraction gave him the advantage, and before you could voice even the smallest protest, he was steering you toward the couch. His hands were steady, firm, but not forceful, leaving you confused and torn between stopping him and giving in to the pull he had on you.
“Heeseung—” you started, but the words barely escaped your lips before his mouth was on yours again, silencing you with a kiss that was anything but gentle. His lips moved hungrily against yours, leaving no room for argument, and when you tried to push back against his chest, your resolve faltered as he moaned softly into the kiss. The sound sent a shiver down your spine, and to your dismay, a small whine slipped out in response.
His lips curved against yours as if he could sense your weakening resolve, his hands started guiding you to lay down on the couch. The weight of his body hovered close, not trapping you but leaving you with the realization that Heeseung wasn’t planning on leaving anytime soon.
“Tell me to stop,” he murmured against your lips, “if you really want me to, I will.” But the way he looked at you, his dark eyes full of yearning and desperation, made it clear he didn’t want you to say the words.
When you didn’t respond, Heeseung’s lips curled into a slow, almost knowing smile. “That’s what I thought,” he murmured, his voice tinged with satisfaction. He leaned down, brushing his nose against yours before capturing your lips once more.
This kiss was different—softer at first, unhurried but still filled with that undeniable hunger. His weight shifted slightly, his chest pressing against yours while his hand slid from your cheek to your waist, steadying you. He kissed you like he had all the time in the world, as though he wanted to memorize every detail, every sound you made, and every way you responded to him.
You couldn’t stop yourself from melting into him, Heeseung’s lips left yours only briefly, trailing kisses along your jaw, his warm breath ghosting over your skin as he murmured, “You don’t know what you do to me.”
Your pulse quickened, your heart hammering in your chest. “Heeseung… please,” you managed to whisper, though your voice trembled, making it come out weaker than you’d intended.
But he only shook his head softly, his lips brushing against your cheek as he murmured, “Shh… Don’t.” His voice was low and soothing, almost pleading, as though he couldn’t bear to hear you say anything that might break the moment between you. “Just… stay with me. Don’t push me away right now,” he whispered.
Before you could respond, his lips found yours again, this time slower, softer, as if he was savoring the moment.
And you couldn’t help but let yourself fall deeper into the kiss.
✰ ✰ ✰
Yeah, you were getting pretty tired now.
After waking up the next morning to an empty bed, Heeseung having dipped sometime before you even stirred, you couldn’t say you were surprised. Disappointed? Sure. Hurt? Maybe. But surprised? Not in the slightest.
The hollow feeling lingered as you dragged yourself to school, telling yourself to just push through the day like nothing had happened. It was easier said than done when the moment you stepped into the halls, you spotted Heeseung leaning casually against his locker, laughing at something one of his friends said, acting like he didn’t have a care in the world.
And of course, he acted like last night didn’t happen. Not a glance in your direction, not a nod of acknowledgment—nothing. It was as if you didn’t exist, as if you hadn’t shared anything at all.
You bit down the frustration bubbling in your chest, refusing to let it show. You’d told yourself you wouldn’t let him get to you, that you’d play it cool, but damn, it was harder than you thought. Watching him joke around, watching him flirt effortlessly with anyone but you—it stung more than you wanted to admit.
You sighed, gripping the straps of your bag a little tighter as you walked past him, pretending you didn’t notice him either.
It got to the point where your friends couldn’t ignore it anymore.
“What’s going on with you and Heeseung?” one of them asked, their tone laced with curiosity and concern. “He was all over you, and now he’s... not. Did something happen?”
You hesitated, debating whether to say anything, but their expectant gazes made it clear they weren’t letting it go. So, with a deep breath, you told them everything.
Their reactions were immediate.
“He did what?” one of your friends exclaimed, her eyes wide with disbelief.
“Are you serious? He was with you and then went back to ignoring you? Twice?!” another chimed in, her voice rising in anger.
They were shocked at first, then angry—angrier than you were, which was both comforting and a little overwhelming.
“You need to stop answering his calls,” one of them said firmly, leaning closer. “He’s just using you as a backup plan when he’s drunk and lonely.”
Another nodded, her expression equally resolute. “Don’t let him in, no matter how much he begs. If you let him in, you’re just setting yourself up to kick him out later. And trust me, that’s worse.”
“Exactly,” a third added, crossing her arms. “And don’t even think about being his friend. Friends don’t wake up in each other’s beds after nights like that.”
The last comment stung more than you cared to admit, but they weren’t done.
“If you’re under him, you’re never getting over him,” another said bluntly, her words hitting harder than you’d expected. “And you deserve better than this game he’s playing with you.”
You sat there, their words circling in your head like a storm. Deep down, you knew they were right. You knew you couldn’t keep letting Heeseung in only to get hurt every time he left. But knowing it and doing something about it were two very different things.
One of your friends sighed, shaking her head. “You know what this sounds like, right? A situationship. That’s what this is turning into.”
The others nodded in agreement.
“That’s exactly what it is,” another chimed in, crossing her arms. “He keeps you close enough to make you think you matter, but far enough to avoid any real accountability. Classic situationship behavior.”
You groaned, leaning back against the bench. “I don’t even know if it’s that deep. He probably doesn’t think about me at all.”
“Well…” one of them started, glancing over your shoulder, her expression shifting into amusement and curiosity.
“What?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at her.
She hesitated for a moment before blurting it out. “Heeseung’s staring.”
Your head snapped around so fast you almost gave yourself whiplash. And sure enough, there he was, standing at the edge of the basketball court, holding a ball loosely in one hand. He wasn’t laughing with his teammates or focused on the game. No, his eyes were locked directly on your group—or more specifically, on you.
Your friends followed your gaze, and a chorus of whispers erupted.
“Oh my god, he really is.”
“What is he doing just standing there?”
“Is it just me, or does he look like he’s debating something?”
One of them nudged you. “Okay, spill. What’s going on in his head? Did you say something to him recently? Text him?”
You shook your head quickly, still staring at Heeseung. “No, I haven’t even looked at him, let alone talked to him.”
“Then why is he staring like that?”
“I don’t know!” you said, your voice low but frantic.
Another friend tilted her head, watching him closely. “It’s not just a glance, either. He’s full-on staring. Like he’s trying to figure out if he should come over here or something.”
The thought made your stomach flip, cause there was something more intense in the way he looked at you—like he was fighting some internal battle.
“Well, whatever’s going on,” one of your friends whispered, “he’s definitely not over you.”
You turned back to your friends, trying to ignore the heat rising to your cheeks. “You guys are making this into something it’s not.”
One of them snorted. “Honey, he’s the one making it into something. Look at him.”
Against your better judgment, you glanced back at Heeseung, and your breath hitched when your eyes met his again. He didn’t look away. If anything, his gaze only grew more focused, like he wanted to make sure you knew he was looking.
You quickly turned back to your friends, forcing a tight smile. “Let’s go,” you said, grabbing your bag and slinging it over your shoulder.
They exchanged knowing glances but didn’t argue. One of them muttered, “Good idea,” as the group began gathering their things.
As you walked away from the bench, you resisted the urge to glance back at Heeseung. Your friends stayed close, their chatter filling the air as they tried to distract you, but it was hard to shake the feeling of his eyes still on you.
When you reached the school gates, one of them broke the silence. “So… are we just going to ignore the fact that he was practically burning a hole in your back with that stare?”
“Yes,” you said firmly, your voice sharper than you intended. “We’re ignoring it.”
Another friend chuckled softly. “Okay, okay. But just so you know, he’s not ignoring you.”
You sighed, running a hand through your hair as you stepped onto the sidewalk. “Well, he’s doing a great job of pretending otherwise most of the time.”
“That’s the thing,” someone said thoughtfully. “Guys like him—they act like they don’t care, but the moment they think they’re losing you? They start doing stuff like this.”
You didn’t reply, tightening your grip on your bag as the group walked down the street. You didn’t want to talk about Heeseung anymore, didn’t want to think about the way he looked at you.
✰ ✰ ✰
It was a vicious cycle, one you hated but couldn’t seem to break. Each time you told yourself it would be the last, that you’d stop answering the door, that you wouldn’t let him in again. And yet, every time the night fell and he showed up—messy hair, glassy eyes, and a crooked smile—you found yourself giving in, letting him cross the threshold into your apartment.
Heeseung had this way of making you feel like you were the center of his world. His hands were always warm, his voice low and sweet, whispering things that made your chest ache in ways you couldn’t describe.
“Why do you do this to me?” you’d asked one night, your voice breaking as you stared up at him, your fingers tangled in his hair.
He’d only smiled, brushing his thumb against your cheek as if he didn’t have an answer, or maybe because he didn’t want to give you one. “Because I can’t stay away from you,” he’d said, his voice so soft you almost didn’t catch it.
But then morning would come, and he would vanish like a dream you couldn’t quite remember, leaving behind an empty space in your bed and a heavier one in your chest. And at school, it was always the same. His eyes would find you across the cafeteria or the hallway, and for a moment, it would feel like everything stopped. But he wouldn’t come over, wouldn’t talk to you. He’d just look.
Your friends noticed it, too, how he’d stare at you as if you were the only thing in the room, even when there were other girls around him, laughing at his jokes and vying for his attention.
“You’re letting him ruin you,” one of them said one afternoon, her voice tinged with frustration.
“I know,” you admitted, your voice hollow. “But it’s not like I can just stop.”
You wanted to hate him, for the way he seemed to pull you in only to push you away, for the way he made you feel like you were everything one second and nothing the next.
But you couldn’t. Because even though you knew it was toxic, even though you knew it was breaking you bit by bit, there was a part of you that couldn’t let go.
Because in those nights, when he looked at you like that, when he touched you like he’d fall apart if he didn’t, you felt wanted. Needed. And no matter how much it hurt afterward, you kept holding onto it, hoping that one day, he’d stop running.
It wasn’t until his friend Jake—of all people—came to talk to you that you started piecing things together. You’d been so caught up in the back-and-forth, the way Heeseung would tease you one moment and ignore you the next, that you never truly understood why. But now, hearing it from Jake, it was like a lightbulb went off in your mind.
Heeseung, despite all the other girls he flirted with, never gave them the attention he gave you. He never kissed them, never looked at them the way he looked at you.
And Jake had confirmed it. Heeseung was in love with you. Hopelessly in love, but he didn’t even know it himself. That’s why he acted the way he did. He didn’t know how to handle it, how to deal with it.
Jake had told you Heeseung was scared. He’d never felt this way about anyone before, and it terrified him. So, he’d masked it all with arrogance, with distance. But when he was drunk, then the walls came down, his real feelings would surface. That’s why he’d always show up at your door when he was intoxicated—because, in those moments, he couldn’t hide from what he truly felt for you.
You wanted to be mad at him for hiding behind that facade, for playing with your feelings. But now you understood. It wasn’t that he didn’t care about you; it was that he was so afraid of what this all meant, of what it would do to him, to both of you, that he couldn’t face it. So, he ran, and he used everything he could to keep you at arm’s length, to protect himself from being honest with you.
But knowing the truth didn’t make it hurt less. You still found yourself torn between wanting to be there for him, to help him figure it out, and wanting to protect yourself from getting hurt even more. Because at the end of the day, you were both so damn lost in this mess.
“Look, I know you’re confused. But you need to understand, Heeseung’s been a mess about this. He’s never felt anything like it before. And trust me, he doesn’t know how to handle it.”
You shook your head, trying to process everything Jake was saying. It didn’t seem to make sense. Why hadn’t he just told you? “But why does he act like he doesn’t care? Why ignore me at school like I’m nothing, and then do… all that when he’s with me?”
Jake shifted uncomfortably, knowing the weight of your words. “It’s easier for him to push you away than admit it to himself. He’s scared. He doesn’t get why he’s so into you. So he avoids it.”
You stared at him, your heart racing as everything started to fall into place. But you still had questions, things you didn’t understand. “But why doesn’t he just… talk to me? Be honest?”
Jake shrugged, his eyes softening. “He doesn’t know how to navigate this. It’s easier for him to hide behind his stupid behavior than face the truth.”
You were silent for a long moment, processing all of the information you had gotten.
When you didn`t answer, Jake let out a resigned sigh, his shoulder slumping slightly before he gave you a supportive pat on the shoulder. "You’ve got to make him talk," he said quietly, his voice filled with sympathy. "You’re the only one who can get him to open up. Just… don’t wait forever, okay?"
He gave you one last look before walking off, leaving you standing there with your heart racing in your chest, all of your emotions tangled up in knots.
Your footsteps were heavy as you walked away from the scene, feeling the weight of every question that lingered in your mind. Why did you have to talk to Heeseung? You weren’t his therapist, nor his emotional support. Wasn’t he man enough to talk to you? You clenched your fists, frustration building in your chest.
What if Jake was wrong? What if he was just trying to paint a picture that didn’t exist, feeding you some narrative to make you feel better about the mess you were in? What if you were making a fool of yourself? The thoughts spiraled, doubt flooding your mind. Every interaction with Heeseung now felt like a game you didn’t know how to play, where the rules were constantly changing and you were left scrambling to catch up.
What if you were just a sidepiece? The thought stung more than you wanted to admit, and the image of Heeseung laughing with other girls earlier flashed in your mind. He was always so charming, so easy with them, and you couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe you were just another stop on his list, a temporary distraction, something to pass the time until someone else caught his eye.
You sighed deeply, rubbing your forehead as you made your way to your car. You wanted to be done with this—done with the confusion, the uncertainty, the constant emotional whiplash. But part of you knew it wasn’t that easy. Nothing with Heeseung ever was.
But maybe Jake was right. Maybe you could be the one to make him talk—to make him finally admit what was really going on in his head, what he was feeling. But was it worth it? Was risking your heart worth it?
You bit your lip, feeling a wave of frustration and sadness wash over you.
✰ ✰ ✰
Okay, to be fair, Heeseung had it coming. You repeated it in your mind like a mantra as you looked down at your phone, the screen lighting up with his constant calls and texts. Each one more desperate than the last, his words slurred, the grammar all over the place—clearly, he wasn’t in his right mind. The messages seemed to echo the chaos in your chest, but you refused to reply.
You stared at the phone, feeling a mix of frustration and something else—something deep and heavy that you couldn’t quite place. He had done this to himself, hadn’t he? He had made his choices, and now he had to deal with the consequences. The constant buzzing of your phone finally slowed, and you thought maybe he had given up. But then, the doorbell rang.
You froze, your stomach dropping. You crept cautiously to the door, standing there for a moment as the bell rang again and again, each chime making your heart race. The knocking started soon after, loud and urgent, but you stayed still, arms crossed, refusing to move.
You weren’t going to let him back in.
The knocking stopped suddenly, and for a moment, everything was silent. And then, through the door, you heard his voice.
“Please… please open the door…” His voice was shaky, desperate, as if he was on the verge of breaking. “I’m sorry. Please, I need you. I just… please don’t leave me like this.”
Your breath caught in your throat. This wasn’t something you were used to hearing from him. It was different.
"I need to see you... I can't stop thinking about you... Please, don't... don't shut me out, not now."
Your heart pounded in your chest as you cautiously unlocked the door, the sound of the latch clicking echoing in the silence. When the door creaked open, you were met with the sight of him sitting on the ground, his posture slumped, eyes staring at the bottle in his hand like it was the only thing keeping him grounded.
As soon as he saw you, he scrambled to his feet, his movements frantic, as if he couldn't wait another second. Before you could even take a step back, his arms were around you, pulling you into an embrace that was far too tight to push him off.
You gasped in surprise, your hands instinctively pushing against his chest. "Heeseung, wait—" But your protest was quickly smothered as he held you tighter, pressing his face into the side of your neck.
“I can’t… I can’t stop thinking about you,” he mumbled, his words slurred and uneven, the alcohol clearly taking its toll. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry for everything. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just…” His grip on you tightened, his hands shaking slightly. “Please, don’t hate me… I need you…” His voice faltered, and you could feel the tremor in his body as he clung to you like you were the only thing keeping him from falling apart.
You took a deep breath, trying to gather the words to say, but before you could form anything coherent, Heeseung’s lips were suddenly on yours. His kiss was urgent, a little sloppy, as though he was trying to drown out whatever feelings were swirling inside him. His hands tangled in your hair, pulling you closer, and you could feel the weight of his need against you.
"Stop," you whispered weakly, your hands pushing against his chest, but it did little to stop him. If anything, he just leaned in further, his lips moving with a frantic energy as he kissed you harder.
You pulled back for a moment, gasping for air, but Heeseung wasn’t letting go. His forehead rested against your neck as he breathed heavily, his lips brushing against your skin. “I need this,” he muttered, almost to himself, his voice muffled but laced with desperation. “I need you.”
You tried again, more forcefully this time, pushing him back slightly, but his grip on you tightened. “We need to talk,” you managed, your voice breaking, your hands trembling as you tried to create space between you two. “You can’t just keep doing this—coming to me when you’re drunk, acting like nothing happened—”
But Heeseung didn’t seem to hear you. His eyes fluttered closed as he kissed you again, this time a little more gently, though it still held that same desperate edge.
You couldn’t help but respond, even if you didn’t want to. Heeseung was like a drug, and you were already too far gone, as his kiss deepened and his hands roamed, you couldn’t ignore the voice in the back of your mind, reminding you that this wasn’t how things should be. You deserved more than this chaotic cycle, more than the confusion, the highs and lows.
But in that moment, you let him hold you, let him kiss you, because you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away. Not when he needed you like this, not when you still felt that pull, even though you knew it wasn’t healthy.
And when he finally pulled away, looking at you with those dark eyes full of longing, you were left breathless, conflicted, and unable to move.
✰ ✰ ✰
It was like a cruel game he played—one step forward, two steps back. After the night, when he’d clung to you, he’d returned to his old ways at school, completely shutting you out. It was as if the moment he left your apartment, the walls came back up, and he was back to pretending you didn’t exist.
You’d see him in the halls, laughing with his friends, flirting with other girls, completely ignoring you like everything that happened between you two meant nothing. It was maddening.
You tried to act like it didn’t bother you. You went through the motions, keeping your head down, focusing on your schoolwork, your friends, anything to distract yourself from the constant ache in your chest. But the more he ignored you, the more you realized just how much it hurt. And it hurt even more because you knew that he wasn’t like this because he didn’t care. He was like this because he was scared. Scared of what was between you, scared of how vulnerable it made him.
Heeseung was a complicated mess, a boy who wanted everything but feared the very thing that could make him feel whole. And you? You were stuck in this limbo, torn between wanting to confront him and just walking away before you got hurt even more.
It was exhausting.
One minute, he was the boy who couldn’t stop touching you, couldn’t stop kissing you, the one who made you feel like the only person in the room. The next minute, he was a stranger.
You were deep in thought, trying to make sense of the mess that was Heeseung, when you suddenly felt a presence beside you. Turning to your left, you saw a guy you barely knew—someone who kept to himself at school, never talking much. He was standing there, a nervous but hopeful look on his face, and before you could even react, he asked, “Hey, would you like to go out sometime? Maybe grab a coffee?”
You opened your mouth to decline, trying to find the right words that wouldn’t make him feel bad, but before you could say anything, an arm snaked around your waist, pulling you in close with surprising force.
Your heart skipped a beat, and you instinctively stiffened as you turned to see none other than Heeseung standing there. He leaned in just enough to block your view of the guy, his eyes focused on the nervous stranger.
Before you could protest or say anything, Heeseung’s voice cut through the tension, casual but firm. “She’s not interested,” he said, his tone leaving no room for argument.
The quiet guy who had been asking you out now looked taken aback, stepping back a bit, unsure how to respond.
You couldn’t believe what was happening. Heeseung had just walked up and made it clear to someone else that you weren’t available. You wanted to say something, to protest, but you couldn’t find the words. It felt as if everything had suddenly flipped upside down.
“I—uh…” The guy stammered, clearly intimidated by Heeseung's presence. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—” He turned quickly and walked off, leaving the two of you standing there in silence.
You snapped back from the suprise and pulled away from Heeseung’s grip, your mind spinning. “What the hell, Heeseung?” you managed, your voice laced with frustration.
He didn’t say anything at first. His gaze flickered to where the guy had disappeared, and then back to you.
You stared at him, waiting for an explanation, but instead, Heeseung just stood there, his expression unreadable.
"What’s your problem, Heeseung?" you demanded, stepping back. You couldn’t contain the anger that was rising in your chest. "Why are you acting like this?"
He ran a hand through his messy hair, his eyes avoiding yours for a second. He let out a frustrated sigh before meeting your gaze. “I don’t know,” he said quietly, the words almost sounding like a confession. “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.”
Your heart sank a little, but it didn’t stop the fire that was still burning inside you. You’d had enough of this back-and-forth.
"Then figure it out," you snapped, pushing him off. "I’m not going to keep doing this, Heeseung. Get your shit together."
He didn’t say anything more, but the look in his eyes—so conflicted, so full of uncertainty—said everything.
You turned on your heel, walking away before he or you could say anything. You didn’t know if you were making the right decision, but you couldn’t keep letting him drag you around like this.
It was later that night, after you’d gotten a bit of distance and time to cool down, when you heard the familiar sound of your doorbell ringing again.
You froze for a second, unsure if you wanted to deal with him yet again, but the quiet, hesitant knock that followed told you it wasn’t the same as before. You found yourself standing by the door, hands gripping the doorknob, hesitant to open it.
When you finally did, your breath caught in your throat. There he was, but only.. not the usual version of him you were used to seeing. His eyes were red-rimmed, his face pale, and he looked... broken.
His eyes locked onto yours, and for the first time in a long time, there was no bravado. He was standing there, vulnerable, as if unsure of how to approach you after everything.
“I… I don’t know what to say,” he whispered, his voice cracking. He wiped his face with his sleeve, almost embarrassed. “I fucked up. I know I’ve been an asshole… but I needed to see you. I need to talk.”
You stood there for a moment, trying to process everything. It was hard—too hard. You’d spent so much time questioning his intentions, wondering if he even cared. Seeing him like this, so exposed, made you feel conflicted. Part of you wanted to push him away for all the hurt he’d caused, but another part of you wanted to reach out and hear him out.
“Why now?” you asked quietly, your voice betraying the frustration you’d been holding back. “Why come to me like this? After everything?”
He looked down at the ground, visibly struggling. When he finally spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper. “I don’t know. I’ve been running from this. From you. From how I feel. And now I’m just… lost.” His words were shaky, like he was trying to hold onto his composure but was failing. “I’ve been an idiot, and I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”
You didn’t know how to respond. Everything felt like it was happening too fast. You opened your mouth to speak, but the words wouldn’t come.
Instead he stepped closer, and for the first time, there was no arrogance in his movements, no cocky confidence. He looked genuinely lost, as if he was desperately trying to figure himself out. “I don’t know what I’m doing… but I know I want to fix it. Fix us. If you’ll let me.”
You took a step back, crossing your arms over your chest as you tried to collect your thoughts. “I don’t know what to say,” you admitted softly, your voice trembling a little with uncertainty. “You’ve been so hot and cold. One minute you’re all over me, the next you act like I’m invisible. How am I supposed to trust that this is real?”
He closed his eyes for a moment, as if he was gathering the courage to say what had been haunting him. When he spoke again, his voice was almost a whisper. “I know... I’ve been a mess. I was scared,” he confessed, his gaze softening as he looked at you. “You made me feel things I’ve never felt before. Things that… terrified me. And instead of coming to you, talking to you about it, I ran. I pushed you away, and I’m sorry for that.”
The way he was standing, so different from how he used to act, made you reconsider everything. He wasn’t hiding behind walls anymore. “I don’t want to be scared anymore,” he added quietly, his voice cracking just slightly. “I want to be with you. If you’ll allow me.”
You could feel your heart pounding in your chest as you tried to figure out what to say next. You were so unsure now, seeing him spill his heart out for you.
“I don’t feel this with anyone else,” he said softly. “No matter how hard I tried to push it down, it’s always been you. You’re the only one who makes me feel like this.” He paused for a moment, before he dropped down to his knees in front of you, taking both your hands gently in his, while his eyes never left yours. “I don’t know what I was waiting for. I was stupid, I was scared. But I know now... I love you,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I love you, and I’m sorry for making you feel like you were nothing. You’re everything to me. Please... let me prove it.”
Your breath caught in your throat, and for a long moment, all you could do was look at him, trying to process what he’d just said. You had never imagined he’d say those words, especially after everything that had happened. But now, as he knelt before you, his hands still holding yours with such gentleness, it felt different. It felt real.
Doubts still lingered, but as you looked at him—really looked at him—kneeling before you, his hands gripping yours, something inside you began to shift.
The truth was, you loved him too. Despite everything—the hurt, the confusion—you couldn’t deny that your heart ached for him. And seeing him like this, open in a way you never thought possible for him, made you realize how much you wanted to believe in him, in this. You took a slow breath, your voice barely a whisper as you spoke. “I don’t know, Heeseung…”
He didn’t pull away, didn’t try to say anything more. He just waited, his gaze never leaving yours, hopeful but patient.
You looked down at his hands still holding yours, his fingers trembling slightly. “I’ve been hurt, and I don’t want to be hurt again,” you said, your voice wavering just a little.
“I know,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “I’ve hurt you, and I’m so sorry. But I promise, I’ll do anything to make it right. Just… let me try.”
Your heart ached at his words. And slowly, almost hesitantly, you nodded. “Okay. We can try.”
He exhaled sharply, relief flooding his features, but you could see the uncertainty still lingering in his eyes. You knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but something inside you told you that this—he—was worth trying for.
He stood up, his hands still holding yours, and pulled you gently into his arms. You let him, your body instinctively melting into his embrace. He buried his face in your hair, his breath warm against your neck.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he murmured. “I’m going to make you see that I mean it.”
Staning there in his arms, the doubts slowly began to fade. Maybe it would take time. But you felt hope stirring within you. Maybe you could try to make this work.
He pulled back slightly, his eyes searching yours, as if trying to read your emotions. His hand still cupped your face gently, waiting for a sign from you. "Can I kiss you?" he asked, his voice low, filled with both uncertainty and hope.
"Yes."
Without another word, his lips descended onto yours, and the kiss was everything. Deep, urgent, and filled with so much emotion that it took your breath away.
When you started to feel breathless you tried to pull away, your breath ragged, but each time you did, he followed you, his lips catching yours again, desperate, insistent. Your heart raced, and your head spun as you tried to pull back for a moment’s reprieve, but Heeseung wasn’t having it.
"Please," he groaned between kisses, his hand gripping your waist tightly. "Just—just let me…" His voice was rough, desperate, as if your lips were the only thing keeping him grounded. "I need you. You… You make my heart beat. You make everything else fade. I want to breathe you in until I can’t breathe anymore."
His words were tangled, like he couldn’t get them out fast enough, like he was trying to make you understand something, but what, exactly, you weren’t sure. His kisses grew more frantic, more needy, and despite your attempts to catch your breath, you couldn’t help but respond to him.
You finally managed to gasp out his name, your voice barely a whisper, "Heeseung... Stop, I need to breathe."
He paused for a split second, just long enough for you to catch your breath, his breathing just as erratic as yours. "I can't... can't stop," he muttered. "You're all I think about... all I want."
✰ ✰ ✰
It was funny how much things had shifted since Heeseung’s confession. You couldn’t deny the change in him. He meant every word he’d said that night, and he made sure to show you just how serious he was about being with you.
Heeseung was intense in everything he did, and his love for you was no exception. It wasn’t just in the way he looked at you, as if you were the only person in the room, or the way he clung to your hand like letting go would mean losing you. No, it was in the small things too. The way he remembered the little details about you, how he stayed up late just to make sure you got home safe from your late-night shifts, or the way he’d pepper your face with kisses whenever he thought you looked stressed.
And then, there were the nights. Heeseung had always been passionate, but now that he wasn’t holding back, it was overwhelming in the best way possible. He left no part of you untouched, no part of your heart unloved. Your skin bore the evidence of his intensity, faint marks that lingered long after his lips had moved on, a testament to just how much he adored you.
He didn’t just say he loved you; he showed it. In every kiss, every touch, every whispered word, Heeseung made sure you knew just how much you meant to him. And while it could get a little overwhelming at times, you couldn’t deny that it felt good—so good—to be loved so completely.
Heeseung's love was all-consuming, and with it came an intensity that left you breathless. He made it his mission to show you just how deeply he cared. But he never lost the playful side that made you fall for him in the first place.
He still teased you relentlessly, knowing exactly how to make your cheeks flush. “What’s that look for, baby?” he’d smirk when he caught you staring, leaning in close to whisper, “Can’t get enough of me?” His confidence was maddening, but you’d learned to give as good as you got.
Sometimes, he’d flirt with you like you were strangers meeting for the first time. “Hey, gorgeous,” he’d say, slidling up to you with a grin. “Come here often?” It didn’t matter if you were at your desk or in the middle of a crowded hallway; Heeseung always found a way to make you laugh and roll your eyes at his antics.
But then, he’d do a 360 and leave you utterly disarmed. Like the way he’d wrap his arms around your waist out of nowhere, pressing his lips to your ear to murmur, “I love you so much.” It was whiplash, the way he could go from cocky to soft in an instant, and it kept you on your toes.
Now that you had Heeseung basically wrapped around your finger, it felt empowering. He catered to you, always quick to appease your whims, and he seemed to thrive on your happiness. Whether it was picking up your favorite snacks, carrying your bag, or pampering you after a long day, Heeseung was yours—and he made sure you knew it.
But he had his limits.
There were moments when he reminded you that, while he adored you, he wasn’t completely under your control. Like when you pushed him too far with teasing, a playful remark about him being “so soft” for you turning into a challenge in his eyes.
One such night, you’d been cheeky, testing how much you could get away with. “You’ll do anything I say, won’t you?” you’d teased, a smirk playing on your lips.
Heeseung’s eyes darkened, the shift immediate. “Anything?” he repeated, voice low and laced with something that sent shivers down your spine. Before you could process, he had you pinned, his hand firm but careful as it held your wrists above your head.
“You like to push me, don’t you?” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear. “Think I’m all soft and sweet?”
You didn’t have a chance to respond before he showed you just how wrong you were. Heeseung wasn’t rough in a careless way—he was calculated, controlled, and oh-so-intense. He left no room for doubt about who had the upper hand in those moments.
By the end of it, you were breathless, your legs trembling as you clung to him for support. Heeseung’s smug grin and the way he kissed your forehead tenderly afterward only made it worse.
“Still think I’m soft?” he teased, brushing a strand of hair from your flushed face.
You couldn’t even answer, too dazed to form words, which only seemed to please him more.
The next day, walking was a challenge, and Heeseung, ever the charmer, had the audacity to chuckle when you winced. “Told you there’s only so much I’ll let you boss me around,” he whispered, leaning down to press a kiss to your temple.
It was infuriating, but it was also Heeseung. And if you were being honest, you loved every second of it.
a/n: finished this while waiting for the train to come, in the snow storm :) reblogs and commentary are appreciated <33
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HI! i love your works and writing so much!! 🩷can i make a request for spencer x fem!reader, where spencer sees reader play with children (whether it be henry or a different child) and gets turned on? later, smut with a breeding kink?🩷 FEEL FREE TO IGNORE IF YOU DONT WANT TO DO IT🫶
OKAY BUT A DISCLAIMER FIRST: smut is so fucking hard to write ISTG!!!! It took me far too long a time to finish this and now I might have just acquired a newfound level of respect for any fic writers out there who regularly whip out smut in every fic. With that said, I hope you bear with me bcs I'm new and generally inexperienced in writing smut, so I hope this is to your liking 😭😭😭 ty for the request and waiting so patiently!! ❤️
Warning(s): fem!reader, 18+ smut content minors dni, oral sex (f receiving), unprotected sex (p in v), breeding kink, praise kink (?), talks of impregnation, profanities, this is just porn without plot tbh
This blurb was written as a part of the "Zara's Birthday Bash and Road to 1K" celebration.
Zara's Birthday Bash and Road to 1K Masterlist / Criminal Minds Masterlist
"What's going on with you?" you asked as soon as the front door was shut behind your back.
Spencer turned around at your question. "What? Nothing's going on with me."
"Don't lie, Spencer. You've been awfully quiet since we left JJ's house." Your statement drove Spencer to tear his gaze away, but before he could take another step, you had seemingly transported right in front of him. "Talk to me. What's going on? Did something happen?"
"Nothing happened, sweetheart. Just forget it, okay?"
"No, I wanna know. Tell me."
Spencer's jaw clenched at your display of persistence. You didn't miss the way his eyes turned a few shades darker as he pinned you with his relentless stare.
"You really wanna know?" Spencer murmured.
Before you could give him a verbal answer, your fiancé suddenly pushed himself forward, trapping your body with his as your back collided against the wall. You gasped at his proximity. The atmosphere quickly shifted as you felt Spencer trailing his nose against the length of your neck.
"You wanna know what's going on? The truth is, I've been going insane," Spencer admitted against your ear. "You're driving me insane."
"Spencer, what are you talking about?"
Against what you thought was possible, Spencer propelled himself further into you, to the point where the air you breathed out became the same one he inhaled. Spencer's knee shoved itself between the apex of your thighs, making you gasp from the unexpected friction that his movement caused.
"I watched you back at JJ's. The way you acted around Henry? I can't stop thinking about it, sweetheart. It's driving me crazy."
"What?" An involuntary gasp slipped past your lips when Spencer's teeth lightly grazed your pulse point. "What are you—"
"I want us to have a baby."
The shock you felt was undoubtedly written all over your face. Spencer pulled back just the tiniest bit so he could stare right into your eyes. The gentleness in his pupils contradicted the desperation found in all of the ministrastions he pulled so far.
"I know when we talked about it in the past, it always seemed like such a distant thing. But after seeing you today—how you doted on Henry? I can't help it, sweetheart." Spencer's fingers strayed towards your cheek, tracing an invisible line until his touch met your jaw. "I want to have a family with you, and I want it to happen sooner rather than later. You own my forever, angel. There's no doubt in my mind that you'll become as amazing a mother just as you are a person."
The admission rendered you speechless. Time arrived into a screeching halt where it stayed there for seemingly thousands of years. Spencer was assessing you with worry in the consequent silence, trying to solve the cipher in your countenance that could give him a clue to what you were thinking.
Just as he was about to call out your name, you lunged forward out of the blue, claiming his lips in an earth-shattering kiss.
The two of you molded into one another like a pair of fitted puzzle pieces. Fire was raging inside your chest when you pulled away, first telltale signs of arousal stirring in the pit of your stomach.
"I wanna have a baby with you, Spencer. Please, I love you so much."
Spencer groaned wholeheartedly at the confession before diving back to kiss you even more fervently than before. Amidst the roaming hands and pleasurable gasps, the two of you somehow managed to stumble into the bedroom you had shared together for the past couple of years. Shed clothes littered the entire path you trudged, and in the blink of an eye, you found yourself naked on the bed with Spencer hovering above you clad in only his boxers.
"You're so beautiful," Spencer mused before taking one of your nipples in his explorative mouth. You writhed in pleasure while his fingers toyed with your other breast, making sure that no inch of your beauty escaped his attention. "Can't wait to see these full of milk, sweetheart. You'd look so beautiful pregnant with my baby."
You could only mewl when Spencer's lips trailed further southward, peppering kisses beneath your navel, just a sliver to where you needed him the most.
"Spencer, please. Ah. Don't tease."
Your fiancé chuckled at the desperation he heard in your voice. If it were any other day, he would have taken the time to edge you even further for the next few hours. But Spencer could feel his boxers getting tighter by the minute, and not wanting to prolong it any further, he slid downward until he was met with the view of your glistening folds.
"Fuck. So wet and gorgeous. Wish you could see how pretty you look, angel."
The moment Spencer's mouth touched your most sensitive part, you were gone for. His tongue lapped your juices like he was a man lost in a dessert while you were his oasis. The moans fled your throat when his lips wrapped around your taut clit, sucking and circling it with his tongue until you thrashed around uncontrollably. He then used his left forearm to pin your torso down, while his other hand started prodding the entrance to your heat.
"Oh my god, Spencer—mmphh," you whined when two of Spencer's fingers were snugly sheathed inside of you, going in and out until the whole room was overpowered by the obscene sound of your squelching wetness.
"You're so wet, angel. Holy shit," Spencer marveled as he fixated onto the movements of his fingers inside of you, the digits shining from your arousal that coated them. "So warm and tight, too. This all for me?"
"For you, Spencer, only for—oh, only for you. Feels so, mmhh, so good."
Spencer knew you were getting close from how tightly your walls were gripping his fingers, along with the way you were grinding your hips against his hand as if trying to amplify the pleasure you were reeling from. But right before the coil in your belly snapped, Spencer promptly removed his hand from your heat, making you whimpered in protest from the loss of contact.
"Patience, angel," Spencer said, leaning down to give you a quick kiss. "I want to be inside you and feel you around me as you cum."
He made quick work in removing his boxers, revealing his erection that was already red and leaking pre-cum on the tip. Spencer hissed when he gave himself a few lazy tugs, aware of your burning stare as you watched him with a raging want.
"Ready, sweetheart?" Spencer asked, waiting for your nod before sliding his tip in. You moaned into his neck until the entire length of his cock was snugged inside, clutching Spencer for dear life as the man cursed against your cheek. "You feel so good around me. Fuck. You alright, angel?"
You could only nod meekly in response. "Need you to move, Spence. Please, move."
Spencer didn't need to be told twice. He drew his hips back until the only thing engulfed by your pulsating walls was his tip, before ramming back into you with enough force to knock the breath out of your lungs.
In no time at all, your fiancé was moving in and out of you vigorously. The lewd sound of skin against skin echoed within the four walls of your bedroom, fueling your desire until your whole being was consumed by everything Spencer. You swore you could almost feel every ridge and vein of Spencer's cock as it slid in and out of your weeping hole, but your hazy brain would argue that it was plainly your lust talking.
"Spencer." His name came out as a gasp as you felt the imminent climax rising higher and higher. "I'm so—ah, s-so close. Please, please, please, I need to—"
"I know, sweetheart. I know you are. Can feel you squeezing around me. Shit. Milking me so good, hm? Gonna milk me, angel? Gonna milk my cock dry?"
You couldn't think of any other reply to Spencer's crude words except to moan even louder.
"I'm close, too, sweetheart. Fuck. I love being inside you like this. 'M gonna cum so much, gonna have my seed so deep inside you until your womb is filled to the brim."
Your walls fluttered at the thought of being full of Spencer's cum, and this little knowledge didn't evade your fiancé's notice as he picked up the pace of his thrusts.
"You like that, huh? Like the thought of my cum in your womb? Can't wait until you're all big and round, sweetheart. You're gonna make such a beautiful mommy."
"Wanna be a mommy, Spencer, I wanna have your baby!"
"Yeah? You want that? Wanna be pregnant with my baby and make me a daddy? Have a part of me inside of you, huh? Shit. Can picture it now, sweetheart. You'll look so gorgeous pregnant. Most beautiful mommy in the world."
Spencer's hips stuttered slightly. The mental image of you pregnant and barefoot, walking around your shared home carrying his child was doing abominable things to every neuron in his brain. That thought alone, along with the way your pussy was getting tighter around him by the second, was inevitably going to push him over the edge.
Without ever abating his pace, Spencer's fingers reached down towards your clit and started rubbing as if there was no tomorrow. You let out a scream at the added sense of pleasure that Spencer's fingers sent to your belly.
"That's it, angel. Just let it go for me. Let go and I'll give you every drop of my cum."
Another powerful thrust, coupled with a delicious stimulation to your bundle of nerves, had you cumming around Spencer's cock like you had never been before. It was one of the most intense orgasms of your life, and you couldn't do anything but wail and moan as Spencer continued to move inside you through it all.
Mere seconds later, Spencer's own undoing crashed into him like a truck. You felt his cock throb before warmth flooded in, spurts of cum painting every inch of your walls until Spencer was sure there was nothing else to empty. He collapsed on top of you as soon as he was done pulling out, panting breaths and a satiated smile as he buried his face in the column of your neck.
"So—" you began once your breathing had evened out, "—we're doing this, huh?"
Spencer looked up at your face. "Are you having second thoughts?"
"No. Definitely not. There's no one I'd rather do this with more than you, Spencer." You smiled, tucking a strand of your fiancé's overgrown curly hair behind his ear. "Although, I do have to say, I didn't expect you to be that type of guy."
"What type of guy?"
"The kind who gets territorial and borderline obsessed with the thought of impregnating their woman."
Your statement caused Spencer to laugh, crinkling eyes and head thrown back in a way that made your heart fall a little deeper for the man. You closed your eyes and sighed when his hand rose to cup your cheek.
"Can't help it, sweetheart. Any guy would be driven wild to have you as the mother of their child. I'm the luckiest guy in the world."
Spencer's proclamation was sealed with a kiss to your lips. It started out innocent enough before escalating in desperation with every minute that ticked by. Spencer swallowed all of your whimpers even when his hand started to meander downward, all the way past your abdomen, and right under your navel where your arousal was beginning to awaken once again.
At the first swipe of thumb on your clit, you gasped against his lips.
"Spence, what are you—"
"Sshh, we're far from finished, sweetheart. Didn't think I'd be done with you so quickly, did you?" Spencer smirked. "I'm gonna keep fucking you through the night, however long it takes, and fill you with loads after loads of my cum to make sure you are pregnant once this is all over. Now, you just lie back, angel. 'M gonna make you feel so fucking good."
#criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#spencer reid smut#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid breeding kink#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds x fem!reader#criminal minds x y/n#criminal minds x you#criminal minds smut#criminal minds fic#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds imagine#zara's birthday bash and road to 1k
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SUR LE POINT ⤿ c. leclerc 16
→ ( in which. . . ) you, toto wolff's daughter, are dating semi-rival team driver charles leclerc and toto is trying his best to support your relationship while also being a proud dad.
→ ( fanfic genre. . . ) smau
→ ( face claim. . . ) taylor hill + pictures from pinterest
→ ( pairing. . . ) charles leclerc x wolff!ballerina!reader
→ ( content warnings/disclaimers. . . ) cursing, fluff, google translated german and french
→ ( author's note. . . ) woohoo another smau! these are genuinely so fun to make but sooo time consuming. i hope you enjoy! see end for more
→ ( masterlist )
─ INSTAGRAM ↴
y/n_wolff
📍monte carlo, monaco
liked by susiewolff, lewishamilton, yourbff, charles_leclerc and 953,730 others
y/n_wolff a break between shows 🌞
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user7 she is stunning!
user10 mother is mothering
charles_leclerc that dog better not be in the apartment when i get home.
y/n_wolff um about that!
charles_leclerc oh mon dieu
y/n_wolff btw her name is olive!!
susiewolff Meine schöne tochter 💓 (my beautiful daughter)
y/n_wolff woher, glaubst du, habe ich es? (where do you think i got it from?)
mercedesamgf1 baby boss is glowing 🫡🫧 liked by y/n_wolff
yourbsf my legs are dead because of you.
y/n_wolff not my fault you couldn't keep up 😒
user44 need to know where you got that top!
y/n_wolff its actually a dress and i made both of the flower and lemon one myself!
user16 i wonder how toto feels ab this
user19 he was asked during an interview and was hesitant, but supportive !!
charles_leclerc holy 🥴 liked by y/n_wolff
lewishamilton you're in monaco and you dont even stop and say hi? smh 😒
y/n_wolff I AM SORRY BLAME CHARLES
charles_leclerc WHY ARE YOU DRAGGING ME INTO THIS?
y/n_wolff BECAUSE ITS YOUR FAULT?
lewishamilton i was kidding 😀
charles_leclerc has added to their story!
caption: i can't even be mad 😔 y/n_wolff
lewishamilton has added to their story!
caption: apology accepted ✅ y/n_wolff
─ TWITTER ↴
─ INSTAGRAM ↴
y/n_wolff has reposted a story!
caption: she's in the zone dnd 💆🏻♀️🌙 y/n_wolff
y/n_wolff
📍vienna, austria
liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton, susie_wolff, francisca.cgomes and 987,540 others
y/n_wolff ladies and gentleman... your 2024 white swan!!
it is such an honor to be awarded this role. ever since i was a kid and saw my first performance of swan lake, i fell in love. from that moment, i knew i wanted to be odette. this is truly a dream come true.
i would like to thank the wienerstaatsballet for such a wonderful opportunity and trusting me with such an important role. along with my amazing parents, toto & susie_wolff, and my wonderful boyfriend charles_leclerc. you have all shown me such support and love, i couldn't have done this without any of you.
(p.s. see the link in bio for showings 😉)
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user16 she is so unbelievably pretty
mickschumacher woohoo!! you go y/n!
y/n_wolff thank you mickyyy
user8 CONGRATS Y/N! liked by y/n_wolff
charles_leclerc so happy for you mon cynge 🫀 (my swan)
lewishamilton congratulations y/n! i remember watching you as a young girl just starting out, this is such a wonderful achievement, you deserve it more than anyone 🖤
y/n_wolff thank you so much lew 🥹💞
user5 they're so sibling coded 💔
mercedesamgf1 woohoo! congrats baby boss 🥳🙌🏻
y/n_wolff thank u admin 🥰
charles_leclerc when you called me to say you got the part, pride flooded my senses. i know how much this part means to you, etoile. i am so happy for you, je t’aime plus que tout ❤️ (star, i love you more than anything)
y/n_wolff i love you so much, mon coeur 💌
yourbsf the best to do it ❣️🦢 liked by y/n_wolff
yourballetfriend happy for u y/n 🙂
user77 she doesn't seem happy...
user44 i wouldn't blame her 🤷🏾♀️
user2 yeah but ballet is competitive it's part of the sport
susie_wolff Ich bin so stolz auf dich, Y/N. Worte können meinen Stolz nicht ausdrücken. Es ist mir eine Ehre, dich meine Tochter nennen zu dürfen (i am so proud of you, y/n. words cannot express my pride. i am honored to call you my daughter)
y/n_wolff hör auf, mama, ich werde weinen, ich liebe dich so sehr (stop mama, i'm going to cry, i love you so much)
francisca.cgomes my fave ballerina 🩰✨ liked by y/n_wolff
scuderiaferrari 🩰🏎️ liked by y/n_wolff
user10 i am so normal about this (i am so insanely happy for her)
─ TWITTER ↴
─ INSTAGRAM ↴
toto_wolff
liked by y/n_wolff, lewishamilton, susie_wolff, charles_leclerc and 2,836,123 others
tagged: y/n_wolff
toto_wolff Congratulations to my wonderful daughter, Y/N. Ich bin so stolz auf dich, meine Blume. Zu sehen, wie du zu dem heranwächst, was du jetzt bist, war so ein Segen. Ich fühle mich geehrt, dein Vater zu sein. Mach weiterhin großartige Dinge, ich liebe dich. (I'm so proud of you, my flower. Seeing you grow into what you are now has been such a blessing. I am honored to be your father. Keep doing great things, I love you.)
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user71 THE STREETS WERE RIGHT!!
user50 this is so sweet oh my god
user9 oh to have a dad like toto wolff
y/n_wolff oh papa, ich liebe dich so sehr. Ich hätte mir keinen besseren vater wünschen können, ich danke dem universum jeden Tag dafür, dass ich gesegnet genug bin, dich als meinen vater zu haben. danke, dass du immer für mich da bist 😭❤️ (oh papa, i love you so much. i couldn't have asked for a better father, i thank the universe everyday for being blessed enough to have you as my dad. thank you for always being there for me)
user11 i want what they have 🥲
susie_wolff Unsere wundervolle Tochter (our wonderful daughter)
lewishamilton What a star🌟!
user14 crying in daddy issues
christianhorner Congratulations, Wolff. You have raised a wonderful daughter.
toto_wolff Thank you, Horner.
user88 the passive aggression
user51 the girls are fighting
mercedesamgf1 Boss man making us cry 🫡
charles_leclerc it is such an honor to be dating your daughter, toto
toto_wolff Couldn't have asked for anyone better.
y/n_wolff does this mean that you will let him win, papa?
toto_wolff No.
*comments under this post have been limited*
whoop! another fic done 🥳this was super fun to write, i loved looking for pictures, especially the toto-baby reader one 💔 not a lot of toto content... oh well. i am thinking of making a taglist, so let me know if you would like to be on it! also, hope i made it clear enough that toto does not know how to use instagram, and reader had to help him with making a post/comment. he doesn't know how like comments yet. thank you for reading! as usual, requests and feedback are welcome. make sure to leave a comment and kudos! (only if you want :P)
#+*. 🗃️f1fnatic's archives - +*.#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#blurb#f1 one shot#f1 imagine#formula one imagine#formula one#f1 2023#formula 1#f1 fandom#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 instagram au#formula 1 imagine#ferrari#mercedes amg f1#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#f1#charles leclerc#lewis hamilton#toto wolff#susie wolff#charles leclerc x you#charles lecrelc#scuderia ferrari#f1 smau
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ok like i dont expect you to write this or anything its more just food for thought- which hayden characters, including hayden, would be a boobs guy, a butt guy, or thigh guy or something else lmaooo
ugh i luh yew for this. disclaimer, most of them are ass men <3
☆ HAYDEN : ass
I'll be real... I don't know. All his exes are flat skinny girls... KIDDING! Hayden is an ass man! He's not one to objectify, but he can appreciate a nice ass when he sees one. He's the type to give your ass a swat in passing, just because. Or because he likes to see it jiggle. Either way, he likes to touch it. Fills his hand nicely.
☆ SAM : boobs
Sam... just objectifies girls. All the time. He's a horny teenage boy, and nothing gets him off quicker than a nice rack on a girl. His favorite pastime is watching the volleyball girls play, and all he can imagine is grabbing at their tits, or burying his face into them.
☆ SCOTT : boobs
Scott'll stare at your tits shamelessly. Especially since Horizon's activities call for so much hard labor, you're constantly moving and working up a sweat. You mostly wear camisoles and tanktops, so he has an amazing view of your cleavage. Plus you sweating usually equals a see through top, which is an amazing perk.
☆ ANAKIN : boobs
Anakin hates that he can't see your body well in your Jedi attire, but he can see your breasts a bit because of the fabric straining against them. He gets distracted during training watching your tits bounce while you swing your saber about.
☆ JAMES : ass
ass man. ASS. MAN. James' favorite position is doggystyle because he gets to watch your ass ripple and jiggle when his hips smack into it. he'll do double takes when he's walking down the street after seeing a girl with a fat ass. bonus points if you're chubby - fatter ass and a whole lotta whole lotta for him to grab onto!
☆ CLAY : thighs
Clay loves your thighs because they make such a comfortable resting spot. After a hectic day at the office, all he wanted was to bury his head in your plush thighs to relax. The way you'd play in his hair while he rested was also even better.
☆ BILLY : hips
No matter what, Billy always has his hands on your hips. he loves to stand behind you, loves to feel you up. whenever you try and step away, he grabs you by your hips and pulls you back into him. he likes the sense of power it gives him.
☆ LORENZO : boobs + waist
Your body was what initially drew Lorenzo in, but your resourcefulness was a plus, so he said. Totally not your cleavage and waist. He helped you get dressed one morning (he was squatting at your place hiding from Gerbino, go figure) and he refused to get his hands off your waist. Just constantly roaming from your tits to your waist, back and forth. He kept saying it was to adjust your undergarments which you knew was NOT true but... it felt good, so you didn't make a move to stop him.
☆ LUKE : ass
For the same reasons as James and Billy. He loves to worship your body, loves to touch on you, just to be near you. He loves you, but the thing that really made him fall in love was your ass in the jeans you wore on your first date together.
☆ KURT : ass
He just loves your ass. Just does. He loves eating it too. He'll absolutely fiend for you, antsy for you to come home so he can worship your ass. Spank it, grip it, fuck it... any and everything. If it can be done, he'll do it to your ass.
☆ DON : thighs
Don likes to rest. He's content with just sitting. Napping, reading a book, just nothing too strenuous. One day you came and sat on his thigh after washing the dishes, and the way your thighs squished and spread had him curious. Despite being married for a few years, you two had only been intimate a handful of times, which meant he hadn't paid your body much attention. So he began to invite you to sit on his lap, and one hand would idly caress your thighs while the other would jot down notes as he prepped for his next sermon.
☆ VADER : hips
He feels like he has control over you when he holds you by your hips. Plus his hands are so large, it's hard for you to get out of his grasp... generally.
☆ AJ : ass
AJ can appreciate any woman's body, but it's something about a girl's ass that always gets him. He's always at fancy gatherings courtesy of his job, so there are always women wearing fancy dresses - most that accentuate their figures. Also, strip clubs. Can't forget those. His favorite thing about the clubs is the dancers bending over right in his face. All he wants to do is give their asses a good, firm smack. He wished they had a bit more, though. Why do they always hire skinny, flat girls to be dancers?
☆ LEO : hips
You two went to dinner after getting engaged, and the dress you wore had him in a frenzy. It wasn't a skimpy dress or anything either, it just accentuated your natural curves. While he was guiding you around, his hand was on your hips at all times. He'd occasionally give a slight squeeze, not to tease you, just because he needed to have a feel of you constantly.
☆ STEPHEN : thighs + boobs
Stevie likes anything about a woman that's maternal. Or, what he considers maternal. Big breasts, thick thighs... those are all things he associates with a mature woman. So naturally, he wants a woman with those physical attributes!
#bnuuy answers#asks!#kylorenslave384#₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ bnuuy's drabbles!#hayden christensen#sam monroe#anakin skywalker#stephen glass#leo campo#leo campoli#james kelly#scott barringer#clay beresford#clayton beresford#kurt matheson#darth vader#don piper#aj takers#luke ryder#billy quinn#lorenzo di lamberti#sam monroe smut#anakin skywalker smut#stephen glass smut#leo campo smut#james kelly smut#scott barringer smut#clay beresford smut#clayton beresford smut#leo campoli smut
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I DIG YOUR CINEMA (5)
harry styles x yn aspiring filmmaker — social media AU
About the smau: yn starts posting videos on youtube and is trying to build a career as a filmmaker. Things are going pretty well for her and she starts getting more attention when she creates content about shows she goes to. She’s also a fan of Harry’s music and some of his fans start getting suspicious when his team starts interacting with her.
Disclaimer: The story it’s set in 2021 and it will follow their relationship through the LOT leg in the US. Since this is nothing but fiction, I will be following some of the real timeline but also adding my own stuff. On top of that, I won’t be basing myself on Harry’s actual posts.
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PART 4 — THE VIDEO // MASTERLIST
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I DIG YOUR CINEMA (PART 5) — FROM SAN ANTONIO TO DALLAS
liked by bestfriend, sisterinlaw, cuteguy and 63,157 others
yourinstagram sightseeing tonight 😍 getting to know these cities only gets better and better guys
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harryfan7 was this before or after dinner with harry? 😏
↳ harryfan3 stoppp. my heart cant take it ↳ harryfan11 no bc the idea of them walking together and stopping to take pictures it’s just so 🤏
lookitsnyoh 🦭 pillowpersonpp 🦥 anthonypham 🧸
↳ harryfan not the teddy bear!!!
harryfan117 MISS SARAH JONES IS HERE user8 whats with all the emojis guys!! let me innnnn user1 YOU’RE BACK 🥰 bestfriend its not the city its all you baby bc you light up the world like nobody else
↳ harryfan that was just… ↳ harryfan5 HEJAHDH NO YOU DIDNR ↳ yourinstagram …. ↳ yourinstagram i dont even know how to react ↳ bestfriend wish i could say im sorry or embarrassed but im actually not
cuteguy Looks amazing!
Sep 10, 2021 •
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liked by user1, user4 and 517 others
cuteguy congrats darling @yourinstagram
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harryfan60 see?? she isn’t dating Harry
↳ harryfan58 I fucking knew it ↳ harryfan62 hope this pr nonsense stops
user14 little sus but alright ig randomguy cool bro user44 dude there’s no way she hasn’t cheated on you lol user3 you guys are so fucking disrespectful can you pls leave this man alone???
↳ user26 I mean he’s the one who decided to go public so… 🤷♀️ ↳ user3 his ig being public doesn’t automatically mean you’re supposed to be rude tho.
user36 Am I the only one who finds this picture adorable?
↳ user38 me too!! i was looking for a nice comment about it lol thanks! ↳ user36 I mean they definitely look like a couple and idk it’s a cute pic :( ❤️ liked by author
Sep 10, 2021 •
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liked by annetwist, bestfriend, cuteguy and 63,879 others
yourinstagram update time: went out for a run and my lungs got on fire. view was great though. zero complaints. also the show last night was INCREDIBLE.
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bestfriend shut up you actually went for a run??
↳ harrystyles I wouldn’t call that going for a “run”. ↳ bestfriend okay that actually makes more sense now ↳ yourinstagram excuse me?????
harryfan OMFG harry interacting with yourbff???
↳ harryfan5 I KNOW! where are you @bestfriend are you still alive??? ↳ bestfriend no ↳ bestfriend but im pretending to be cool about it so 🤫 ↳ harryfan OMFHAJDHPAHDJ ILY
cuteguy 😍 user7 yessss! two days in a row!!!! thank you!!! user1 looks so prettyyyyyy! hope you’re doing okay <33
↳ yourinstagram i am!! thank you love <333
yourbrother Won’t believe you’ve moved your ass to be healthy until I see it.
↳ yourinstagram the fact that you dont believe me wont change the fact that it happened :D
harryfan15 harry is such a stalker. interacting with her posts when he doesn’t even follow her lol harryfan25 Anne started following her!!! user10 Not to rush you, but are we getting more videos anytime soon? I was so used to getting one every week… :( user25 So… She’s officially dating that cuteguy, isn’t she?
↳ user17 What? Who said that? ↳ user25 TMZ updated that article of her and Harry having dinner with this picture of them ↳ user17 Oh… Where can I see this picture? ↳ user25 She’s tagged on it. @cuteguy posted it ↳ user13 i wouldn’t believe (or read) TMZ guys ↳ harryfan68 funny how you won’t believe TMZ when it’s about this guy but you’ll believe them when it’s about harry ↳ user13 lmao I’m not in that fandom so I couldn’t care less about her dating harry or not.
harryfan13 SO WE ARE ALL GOING TO IGNORE THE FACT THAT HARRY AND YN WENT OUT FOR A RUN TOGETHER?????
↳ harryfan60 Yes bc no one actually believes they did. Next. ↳ harryfan68 hahaha you ate this one
Sep 10, 2021 •
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liked by harryfan, harryfan2, harryfan3 and 4,375 others
harryupdates A fan met Harry in San Antonio today!
According to the fan, Harry said he was on a tight schedule so couldn’t stay for a chat, but agreed to take a quick picture and thanked her for going to the show.
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fanwhometharry “Thank you so much I hope you enjoyed it”, those were his words exactly :’)
↳ harryfan27 OMG IT WAS YOU?? YOU’RE SO LUCKY ↳ fanwhometharry I know!! Thank you!!! ↳ harryfan24 was he alone?? ↳ fanwhometharry No, he was walking with his personal trainer and Yn ↳ harryfan52 his personal trainer also has a name btw and it’s Brad ↳ fanwhometharry Sorry, I don’t keep up with his personal trainer 🤷 I only know Yn bc I watch her youtube videos ↳ harryfan9 don’t apologize they’re always finding something to complain about lol happy for you!!
harryfan72 How convenient… He always agrees to take pictures when Yn is around 🙄
↳ harryfan68 right??? almost as if he WANTS people to spread the word…
harryfan13 I KNEW I WAS RIGHT AND THEY WERE TOGETHER
Sep 10, 2021 •
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liked by annetwist, bestfriend, cuteguy and 61,574 others
yourinstagram DALLAS! you are sooooo so pretty <3 we arrived yesterday and im already in love. it was a sunny afternoon so i went out for a walk, and as i was on my way to buy some flowers to myself (bc i wanted some so i got some) i had one of those surreal moments thinking about how lucky i am to be where i am right now. im always waiting for this feeling to eventually go away so i can come back to my “old life” and my “old self”, but now im kinda considering that as time goes by and i get to know more and more places, it will actually only grow bigger and bigger, right? :’)
(in that case, feel free to unfollow me now bc the annoyance will only grow bigger and bigger as well — consider yourself warned.)
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sisterinlaw The summer vibes are gorgeous! harryfan42 WAS HARRY WITH YOU???? user1 another post??? feels like going back to the old times im so happy!!! harryfan64 this girl won’t even post her face and she got like 4k new followers in one day
↳ harrystyles82 It’s the Harry Styles effect ↳ harryfan64 glad im not the only one who sees it 🤡
harryfan YN? DID YOU ACTUALLY JUST SAY I WANTED SOME SO I GOT SOME???
↳ harryfan5 i saw that too i was like… okay 😂 ↳ harryfan9 hahaha I hope she actually did get some tbh ↳ harryfan13 ME TOO!! ↳ bestfriend yes. she 100% did ↳ harryfan9 😲 ↳ harryfan lmaoshuahsjbjh ↳ harryfan17 wait @bestfriend she 100% say “i wanted some so i got some” or she 100% got some? ↳ harryfan23 oh god i cant believe this is a real conversation you guys are having HAHAHA
user17 please keep feeding us with your random cute posts!! <3 i love them!! bestfriend fgs @yourinstagram have some manners bestfriend i thought you didnt like exposing yourself like this bestfriend also… your mom is on instagram so… bestfriend PLEASE
↳ yourinstagram omfg shut upppp ahusdhjahj ↳ yourinstagram stop encouraging the nonsense behavior??? ↳ yourinstagram you KNOW i meant the flowers ↳ yourinstagram i wanted some FLOWERS so i got some FLOWERS ↳ bestfriend yeah i know 💐 ↳ bestfriend sorry its just too funny sometimes 💋
loveynrry did anyone else notice yn hasn’t liked THAT picture yet? 👀
↳ user4 which one? ↳ loveynrry the one @/cuteguy posted ↳ user4 ohhhhhh 👀 ↳ user4 also did you notice yourbff doesn’t follow him ↳ user9 shit @user4 i hadn’t noticed that ↳ loveynrry i did, yeah… thats why im sus about him ↳ user4 I mean, I trust yourbff judgement soooooo……
Sep 11, 2021 •
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— — — — —
PART 6: PHILLY AND DC
— — — — —
#harry styles fake ig#harry styles fake instagram#harry styles fake social media#harry styles smau#harry styles social media au#harry styles writing#harry styles#harry styles blurb#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fic#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry x reader
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sorry to be that rehash that droid de suggondeez plotline (I REFUSE TO CORRECTLY SPELL FRENCH) with big e stealing a wife but could we pretttty ppLEAAAASE get some more mothiir? i am obsessed with the eldritch inhuman but human behaviour you write him with. it makes me want to chew on him while simultaneously wanting to beat him with a brick out of hatred. i have so many ideas. but ill take anything you offer up fr ill live off the scraps like a feral dog, its just that the the whole david and goliath vibe is TASTYYYY. please dignify my complete insanity for just an intsy winsy second because all i can imagine is how utterly FUCKED the stolenwife!reader's pov is. you try fight back a little too much? oh haha, ur so cute, but keep biting or scratching him and he'll sicc one of the custodes (or a few) to really try you out. let you be so overstimulated youre begging for something in you, and oh boy big e'll sooo do that dont worry. or maybe humble you by keeping you basically half bare like yeah not so cocky now LMFAO IM SO SORRY I NEVER GIVE PROMPTS SO BRAZENLY LIKE THIS BC IM A COWARD FULL OF SHAMEEE UR SO MUCH BRAVER THAN MEEE (thank you sm if you do or dont run with anything i spat out just then)
first of all, never apologise for requesting stuff and also i totally respect your disrespect of the French language. as an englishwoman i am contractually obligated to hate those frog-eating bastards (disclaimer: this is satire pls don’t cancel me). secondly i absolutely love your description of my interpretation of big e because it is also exactly how i feel about him. beat him with brick, pat hair, back to brick. I know i have moved away from that content but I still wave my emperor fucker flag and am always taking requests for him
i promise there will be actual coherent fic soon, but for now here is a bullet pointed list of the sort of things that guilliwife experiences (if there is one in particular you want a full fix of let me know):
the Emperor steals you, and does not think to tell Guilliman — why would he? He fucks you, enjoys it tremendously, then has to go and do some important Master of Mankind warp fuckery that means you spend about a fortnight in some random rooms with no one to talk to but the Custodes. And they barely talk! You never work out if they are bodyguards or prison guards, since you can’t imagine that you are important enough to warrant guarding, but you also don’t think that there is much effort needed to stop you escaping. Where would you even go?
It would be so much easier if he was always a selfish monster in bed — but he isn’t. Worse: he eats pussy exactly how you think a man with millennia of practice would. He likes bringing you to the very edge of orgasm and just stopping, pillowing his cheek on your stomach and watching as you whine and cry, partly with guilt and partly with sheer frustration. You end up begging him to fuck you, stumbling out every title you can think of — lord, emperor, sire, master — but his patience is limitless, and he can keep going for hours, until you’re completely insensible, promising every depraved thing if he will just stop teasing and put it in you
You belong to him. No one else is allowed to touch you — apart from valdor, one of his oldest friends and dearest allies. And captain Kytan. And a few other custodes. Sometimes at the same time. They’re extensions of his most absolutely not divine will — they can partake in the same luxuries he allows himself, otherwise what kind of a leader would he be? He likes seeing his best soldiers happy, especially when it’s because valdor is balls deep in your arse, while he enjoys the sweet warm stretch of your throat. You jostle and whimper between them, so full that you can barely breathe, and afterwards the emperor watches as valdor thumbs open your cheeks, just to watch your holes struggle to close up around the shape of his cock. Still, valdor can’t linger too long - there is already a line
He will cum inside you so much you swear your stomach bulges a little from it all. You have nightmares about popping like a balloon
eventually word reaches the Emperor that Guilliman is looking to speak to him as a matter of urgency — he is currently buried deep in your throat, enjoying the cute little gluck-gluck-gluck noises your gag reflex makes as you try to fit him all the way into your tight gullet. He does not ask you to stop this before answering the vox from a distraught Roboute, who is blathering about his fiancée going missing? The Emperor chuckles a little to himself, patting your hair — ah, having a woman to be wed and a woman in his bed, Roboute is far more like his father than first thought — wait. Ah. Singular woman. Singular. Shit.
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—LATE BLOSSOM (cont.)
farleıgh x reader 【3/3】
w.c: 6,379
part ¹: here
part ²: here
disclaimers: smut ;), 18+, nsfw, unprotected p in v (stay safe out there guyz), fluff!!, wine drunk, intoxicated sex, creampies, sexual tension, sweet, lovey, softdom!farleigh, pining, happy ending
—synopsis: you are invited over to your boss's home again for dinner. the two of you share a glass a wine after, making the atmosphere reach warmer, intense places.
a/n: hiiii. im ssooo sorry this took foreverrr. bur its here guys! i really hope both my fluff and smut enjoyers enjoy this c: all love! sorry for typos!
「 divider by @/cafekitsune」
"damn it...damn it..– damn it!" farleigh hissed under his breath before slamming his hands on both sides of his laptop. you jumped from the sudden loudness at the coffee and tea station, frowning upon your boss's displeasure.
"sir, might i advise you to take a break?" you suggested, getting waved off by the brooding male. he exhaled loudly before leaning back in his chair, holding the bridge of his nose.
"i cant take a break when these files are due back to HR and marketing. i've been so swamped lately. its a never ending pile of spreadsheets, reports and numbers." farleigh grumbled in reply. you continued to make a cup of tea with milk and sugar, bringing the cup to your boss's desk.
"then i will advise you to have a cup of tea, yes?" you werent looking for a real answer and you weren't going to take no for one either. before farleigh could respond you had already placed the cup right in front of him and gently pushed his stack of papers away. he opened his mouth to protest but immediately closed it, his eyes following you without moving his head. a certain smile stayed on his lips.
"you really know how to read me dont you, [y/n]?" you couldnt hold back the smile forming on your lips, simply shrugging at the man's statement.
"it's my job, isnt it?" you queried in a cheeky tone. farleigh chuckled and sipped the cup quietly. you noticed his shoulders relaxing as he drank, mentally giving yourself a high five. farleigh knew how to stress himself out but he was a stubborn one and always pushed through it. having you around meant actually forcing him to take a break, because you didnt allow him to over exert himself. you would find little time slots to occupy his mind with something else to basically be considered a break, whether it be sipping a cup of tea, looking out the landscape window, or starting a conversation on a topic not related to work.
when you would fix a cup of tea for mr.start, he usually stopped everything to drink at least half his cup before tending to his job again. it was nice to see him relax, and it was so unfortunate that the time of bliss was so little. it had been 3 days since you babysat benjamin, and farleigh told you he asks about you minimally 4 times a day. you smiled everytime farleigh mentioned a time benji randomly brought you up in topics like dinosaurs or pizzas, connecting to the things you did while babysitting.
you missed benji, you did. but it would probably never happen again, maybe once in a blue moon right?
"thank you, [y/n]." farleigh hummed in content, drinking his beverage. you grinned and winked at him. farleigh knew the wink meant nothing, but his chest got warm at the sight of it, maybe it was the tea.
as you cleaned up the beverage station, farleigh couldn't help but stare. his eyes trailed your body from head to toe. from your neat, low ponytail, to your fitted striped button up that ever so slightly hugged your chest and cinched your waist, down to your fitted black slacks.
he enjoyed when you wore pencil skirts, from long to short, you looked eye-catching in them. but you looked good in anything you put on really. from slacks, to skirts, to blouses or blazers. you had a subtly amazing fashion sense even in the work environment.
he sometimes wondered how you looked with everything off—
"[y/n], are you busy tonight?" farleigh blurted, the blood suddenly rushing to his ears. you perked up at the question, quickly turning to face mr.start. your brow rose from seeing his demeanor looking more flushed than a handful of seconds ago.
"well, i was just going to hang out with my roommate and share a couple of beers." you thought aloud. farleigh didnt peg you to be a beer drinker but for some reason if made you more attractive to him. something about seeing a girl chug and entire thing of beer was a slight, slight turn on.
"if you have plans, no worries, [y/n]." the curly brunette man quickly waved his hand again, chuckling sheepishly. you studied your boss for only a second, noticing his body language. you kept quiet with your thoughts to not make unwanted tension, playing it off with a laugh.
"farleigh its okay, i will let my roommate know we can do it later in the week. what time did you want me to head over?" you smiled brightly. the man's heart damn near jumped out of his chest at the mere sound of his first name leaving your mouth. he'd always try to get you to be more comfortable saying it when you were in his home, but hearing it in the work environment made his heart tingle.
"yeah ..uhm–" mr.start cleared his throat of any stutters. "great, we'll leave together then, yes? i'll make sure to let margaret know to let benji stay up a bit later to join us for dinner. would that be alright with you?" farleigh's brown eyes stared into yours with a glimmer in them. you now noticed an even brighter shine to his person, differencing his attitude just moment ago over work. you shared one last smile with your boss, nodding at his plan before sitting at your personal desk to continue work. you didnt fully acknowledge it, but you were excited. excited to know more about mr.start's life outside work.
°°°
it was nearing the end of the day, and the sun was beginning to near the end of the horizon. you loved watching the sun set. the sun painted the sky vibrant oranges and purples this evening. you stared for a while, making sure to remember every detail.
"ready to go, [y/n]?" farleigh hummed, smiling at your deep gazing at the sky. you glanced over at him and nodded with a smile, a rosey blush dusting your cheeks.
"margaret says dinner will be nearly done when we get there, let's head out shall we?" farleigh closed his laptop, sliding it into his sling bag. you tidied your desk and grabbed your belongings before following your boss out of his office, thanking him for holding the door open. the two of you stepped into the lift, pressing the first floor and simply waited. you glanced at him and he glanced at you, giggles soon erupting from you and farleigh.
"they should really put some music in here." you joked, farleigh humming in agreement. soon the lift finally let you two go and farleigh led you to his car. you dont know what you expected, but since farleigh had a chauffeur pick you up last time, you didnt know what he drove. farleigh led you to a sleek, black, 2-door luxury model car. it had to be one of the most recent models, and it was gorgeous. you continued to hide your surprise, thanking farleigh as he opened your door first for you.
the brunette quickly hopped into the car and turned over the engine. the car revved up impressively loud and you couldnt help but smile, looking at your boss. he chuckled at your amazement.
"a jaguar, first big boy purchase of mine since taking over the company a couple years ago." farleigh grinned, putting the car in reverse. the car had an amazing interior, sleek and fairly roomy. you decided to put your nerves aside and relax a little, listening to whatever was on the radio whilst staring out the window. the ride wasn't too long, about 20 minutes. the sun was near set now and purples and blues overtook the sky. it was a long day and you were tired, yes, but you weren't one to fall asleep in others cars. yes you trusted farleigh but not enough for him to see you sleeping. that felt like another level of intimacy to you.
just as you as your eyes began to slowly close, farleigh turned down the music. "we're here, sleepy head." the corners of your mouth turned upwards at his words and you rotated your body to face forward.
"i wasn't asleep. very close though." you admit, farleigh chuckling.
"yeah well, i hope youre still hungry." farleigh parked the car in front of the estate doors, a butler immediately coming to the brunette’s side.
"good evening sir." greeted the suited man. farleigh slowly stepped out, also greeting the butler. his eyes noticed another walking out to open your door, but he subtly and quickly waved at him to stop walking. farleigh handed the keys to the butler in front of him before walking over to your side of the car. you thanked him for opening your door. it was a small gesture, yes but it spoke volumes of his character.
the two of you walked in, almost immediately being greeted by the mini farleigh himself. benji squealed with happiness and jumped into your arms. you laughed at his excitement, hugging him tightly and spinned him around.
"i missed you miss [y/n]! did daddy tell you how much i missed you? i missed you sooo much!" your cheeks began to hurt from how much you were smiling at the boy. you nodded at him and set him down.
"i heard! i missed you too benji." you exclaimed, hearing farleigh laugh quietly at such a cute interaction. benji exclaimed again and headed towards him, giggling as his father scooped him up.
"good evening margaret." farleigh spoke, nodding his head to the brunette maid. margaret curtsied and smiled, beginning to follow you, farleigh and benji further into the house.
"good evening sir, i hope your day was well. dinner is not yet so i apologize. i'd say about 15 minutes more till then." farleigh waved it off, setting benji back on the ground for him to run around.
"no worries, how about to take benji to get ready for dinner please yes?" margaret nodded at mr.starts request, taking benji's hand and guided him to his room. farleigh turned to you and smiled before walking and curling his index and middle finger, signalling for you to follow him.
you obeyed silently, admiring the house per usual. you dont think you could ever get used to it. farleigh led you to his room, setting his laptop case on his dresser. you looked around in slight awe. the color theme of the bedroom was a phthalo green and maroon. theyre were gold accents on the furniture pieces such as his nightstand, dresser and bed frame, complimenting the mahogany wood. his bed sheets and pillow cases were the maroon red color while the wallpaper took the green with lighter accented green flourishes.
"your room is pretty." you complimented. farleigh grinned, his cheeks flushing a more rosy color.
"thank you. here, its a dress for dinner. it was my aunts, but i think it'd look nice on you." you gasp softly. it was a simple black dress. but something about the style made you gush over it. it was a rather nicely made dress. you headed towards the bathroom and took off your work clothes, neatly folding them before taking your hair out of your ponytail. you pulled out a couple of front hair strands before putting your [h/c] hair in a fluffy messy low bun for a simple, more presentable look.
you thanked yourself for already wear black low heels to work, them going perfectly with the dress. stepping out with your belongings, you caught farleigh as he was beginning to button his shirt. you could see his entire abdomen and chest through the open sliver of the button up he out on, along with his undone tie. you subtly rotated your body 90° degrees, clearing your throat to catch your boss's attention.
"hm? oh, [y/n], you look amazing." farleigh praised, smiling big at your look. you laughed sheepishly, glancing to see if your boss was more presentable, and he was. he was more than two-thirds of the way done buttoning his shirt. you placed your clothes on his dresser and turned to him again, subconsciously grabbing the ends of the dress.
"you think so? it fits nicely." your hands ran down the sides of your body, enjoying how the dress accentuated your figure.
"it does .." farleigh swallowed thickly, letting out a light laugh. it did* fit your figure nicely. it hugged your curves in all the right places. from chest, to waist, to backside..
farleigh blinked his way back to reality before clearing his throat. he nodded his head towards the door, signaling you to follow him as he buttoned his cuffs. you and your boss walked down to the dining room, walking in just as the chef walked in with the dish tray.
"right on time mr. start." margaret gleamed. benji waved excitedly towards you, briefly thanking the chef for his plate.
"you look so pretty miss [y/n]!" exclaimed the son, cheesing towards you. you smiled sweetly, thanking him before noticing farleigh had pulled your chair out next.
"thank you sir." you blushed quietly, avoiding his gaze..
"farleigh*, [y/n]." he pressed, playfully holding up a finger.
"thank you, farleigh." you spoke softer than last time. the chef brought you your plate, uncovering it for you. it was sirloin dressed in a homemade wine roux, set over broccoli and mashed potatoes. the plate was garnished beautifully.
"oh wow, this looks amazing s– farleigh." you quickly caught yourself from using mannerisms, smiling up at the tall man. you grinned and looked at the chef, who nodded his head softly before making his exit. benji's plate has smaller portions, and his meat was already cut up into smaller pieces.
you, farleigh, and benji all dug in, a comfortable silence enveloping the room besides the sound of dishware clinking. you took occasional glances towards farleigh, sharing the brief seconds of eye contact. you couldnt fully pinpoint it but something had been different with farleigh today. maybe he had been nervous, but it just seemed more, easily flustered today. was it the stress? maybe he was tired? you didn't dwell on it much, because he looked better now. maybe it was the food helping him.
mr.start did look much more relaxed, maybe a bit of a content glow coming from him too. he was so pretty to you. you didnt think it much but your boss was such an attractive man.
"miss [y/n], will you come over more? i missed you alot." benji sputtered out, tilting his head your way. you nearly choked at such a powerless question towards you.
"well," you cleared your throat, gently dabbing the corners of your mouth with your cloth napkin. "me and your father will have to discuss, sweetheart." you grinned cheekily towards the man, who had the most adorable clueless expression to him face. you notice his face pigmentation became more rosy again.
"well benji, what are your ideas?" farleigh cut into his serving, raising a brow towards his son. benji began to smile again, giggling.
"babysitting me again!" he exclaimed before stuffing his mouth with another piece of broccoli.
farleigh chuckled as he chewed his food, shrugging with no contest. his brown eyes found your [e/c] ones, his smirk subtly sitting on his mouth.
"i- heh," you diverted your eyes out of bashfulness, staring back up to meet your boss's. "once a week, maybe on the weekends? and, of course, if you need me for more days of course, sir." farleigh's smirk grew, looking as if a light in his mind was going off. he nodded at your words before looking at his son.
"sound good benji?" farleigh questioned, getting a very happy benji nod as he ate his food. the entire interaction left the entire table in quiet small smiles from everyone. you and farleigh began to share more glances within the next 5 to 10 minutes of eating, everyone beginning to finish their plates. small silly conversations broke out now, you and farleigh entertaining benjamin's silly little thoughts.
"im serious daddy! if dinosaurs were alive, i would go horseback riding with triceratops!" you giggled at his statement, nodding impressively.
"oh of course benji. i would ride a t-rex and your father would ride a ..brachiosaurus? you know the once with the long neck?" benji burst out in a fit of giggles, while looking at his dad.
"do you– do you think he would sit near the brachiosaurus's face or near his body?' benji said between laughs. it was clear the boy was imagining the silliest of things about his father on a dinosaur.
"oh i definitely think next to the head so he sways like a seesaw." you laugh, noticing farleighs face becoming fully red as he crossed his arms, enjoying the sweet interaction between you and his boy. farleigh had a glimmer in his eye again, enjoying a beautiful trustworthy woman laughing and giggling with his sweet boy. he made sure to remember this moment before interrupting. he was already holding himself together enough.
"alright benji. time for bed young man." benji wiped his mouth before standing up, he hugged his father first, accepting several forehead kisses before coming over to hug you.
"g'night miss [y/n]." he whispered, making you gleam. you kissed his cheek before responding with a 'goodnight love.' margaret took benji's hand and exited the dining room.
"well," farleigh sighed, standing up. "wine?" he offered, helping you out of your seat. you nodded, and followed him to the front kitchen.
he grabbed a different bottle from the last time, labeled shiraz, making you briefly remember the last time together. how peaceful it was to see to mr. start in such a casual setting once more. how tall* he is up close. how warm he was.
"im glad you enjoyed today, [y/n]." farleigh hummed as he rolled up his sleeves. he then undid his tie and unbuttoned his first 3 buttons. his chest peeked out ever so slightly and his forearms briefly caught your eyes, causing you to focus primarily at the granite island.
"the pleasures all mine, sir. i loved seeing benjamin today." you adorned, shrugging softly. farleigh grabbed 2 wine glasses this time, your eye catching the difference. he seemed more relaxed this time around.
"i hope you can hold your alcohol. this is a little stronger than pinot noir. shiraz is a bolder, drier wine." farleigh explained, pouring half glasses for the two of you.
"i'd say i'd can definitely hold my alcohol pretty nicely." you boasted, taking a first couple of few bold sips. it was nice and cool, but seconds after the alcohol began to warm your chest and stomach. you were glad you ate. it was a stronger wine, but you honestly preferred it due to its decedency in fruity flavor.
"so, are you really okay with ..babysitting once a week? i apologize for just throwing you out to sea, [y/n]." you quickly waved your hand in the air, shaking your head.
"its completely fine, really. i dont do much on the weekends anyways. and i'm fine with taking care of him when your babysitter cancels again." farleigh couldnt hide his excitement, staring down his glass with a smile.
"thank you, [y/n]. i'm glad you enjoy my son's company." farleigh sipped his glass again, clearing half of the half.
"if anything, i'm glad you allowed me to see this part of your life, farleigh. even as a secretary, it makes me feel like you can trust me greatly." you expressed happily, sipping your wine to stay near farleighs pace. deep down you were sightly competitive, only slightly. when someone tests you, you tend to enjoy to prove them wrong. you could hold your alcohol, but due to farleigh being way taller and bigger, you were sure his body could handle more than you.
"i do trust you, [y/n]. it means alot to me that i found another person to trust with my son." farleigh laughed breathlessly, briefly remembering his first few babysitters. benjamim did not enjoy them at all. finding his most recent one was a god send. margaret had recommended him to a nanny company. farleigh walked to your side of the counter, leaning up against the granite and he looked down at you. he downed the rest of his glass before grabbing the bottle to pour another.
"i feel like youre testing me, sir." you articulated sheepishly. the brunette raise a brow, his pearly whites beginning to show as he laughed.
"if you can't hold your alcohol, [y/n], youre fine to only have one glass." he teased, pouring another half glass. you scoffed and downed the rest of your first glass holding it out for another. farleigh playfully held his free hand up in surrender, also pouring you another half glass.
you could already feel the effect of your first few ounces of shiraz. you felt good, warm even. the air around you gave you a soft yet secure hug and allowed your shoulders to relax.
"i'm not letting you outdrink me farleigh. just because your the boss, doesnt mean you can out drink me." you crossed your arms, turning your nose up playfully. farleigh copied your stance, your eyes catching his toned forearms again. they were a warm brown tone in the soft kitchen light.
farleigh also noticed you had relaxed more, but it was clear you werent lying about holding your alcohol. your cheeks did gain more color them as you became more intoxicated though. the bottle had about less than a half of a glass left in it anyways.
"im not going to outdrink you because i'm your boss. im going to outdrink you because i can, sweetheart." there it was again, that pet name. your heart lurched as it rolled off of his tongue. his tone of voice made it seem like sweet honey. he tipped his glass towards you before finishing his second glass straight. you were slightly baffled, getting a laugh from farleigh at the shock on your face. he hand gestured to your glass, clicking his tongue.
"feel free to prove me wrong." he encouraged. you huffed and grabbed your glass, downing the fruity fermented liquid in one go, just like he did. you coughed quietly as the slightest of burning at the back of your throat, the warmth filling your entire torso now.
"wow." farleigh made a seemingly impressed face and gave you a round of applause, causing you to giggle. you surely felt the buzz now. it wasnt like a harsh intoxicated like vodka or rum. it was a warm and fuzzy tipsiness.
"would you like to finish the bottle?" farleigh held the near empty bottle, shaking it like a tease. still full of stubborness, you went to grab it. but farleigh pulled it back with a shake of his head. he took the bottle to his mouth, and sipped an estimated half of what was left. you slightly couldn't believe what you were seeing, your boss downing wine straight from the bottle. you felt like you were in college again. your eyes then caught a drop of wine that slipped out and trailed down from his mouth and down his jaw. the drop of red traveled down his chin, and over his adams apple. you watched as it bobbed up and down with every sip. for some reason, your body felt even warmer.
farleigh took the bottle away from his mouth, wiping the drop of wine with his thumb and licked it briefly.
"still want to finish it?" the brunette taunted. you rolled your eyes and went to grab the bottle again, but farleigh pulled it away once more.
"farleigh c'mon on–" but he cut you off by moving closer towards you, incredibly close. it startled you ever so slightly but you didn't move back.
"open up." he commanded fenderly, his voice low. you listened with no argument, watching intensely as farleigh brought the mouth of the bottle to your lips. he slowly tipped the bottle upwards and his eyes never left your mouth, watching as you sipped the last bit of wine. the same thing happened and a drop trailed down your chin. as you were about to lift your hand to wipe it, you felt another hand on your chin, concluding it was farleighs. your heart skipped a beat again, another beating in a different place. as u finished the bottle, farleigh set the bottle down and met his eyes with yours, licking his thumb of the wine he wiped off your skin.
your eyelids felt heavier, you were getting lost in the imaginations of your mind. if you had to rate yourself on how drunk you were, you were a 6 out of 10, nearing a 7. you sighed, leaning back on the island whimsically. you giggled cheekily, smiling to yourself. farleigh watched as you began to clearly become wine drunk. if he was being honest, he wasnt that far behind you either, but that was most likely due to downing those glasses in a short amount of time. he rested his chin in the palm of his hand as he watched you smile to yourself.
"you okay, [y/n]?" he questioned with a cheeky smile. you forgot where you were and immediately lifted your head up, turning to the man face who was half a foot away from yours. you gulped, feeling his beautiful brown eyes examining your features. you felt immensely seen right now. the air seemed to thicken and get warmer around you and him, as if there was a magnet pulling you two together. you were in denial though, so much denial. how could a man like farleigh start go for someone like you? it had to be the alcohol in your system. you diverted your gaze and leaned up off the counter to open the fridge to breathe a little. you didnt know what to feel.
"i-i'm kinda craving chocolate.. i remember it goes well with wine." you mumbled loud enough for farleigh to hear. you tried your best to seem busy, looking at anything that was in the fridge. you found the chocolate almost immediately but wanted to stay clueless, having the alcohol to blame if farleigh asked why you couldn't see it. farleigh watched your person inquisitively. his body pulsed and his jaw clenched. the pining was beginning to irk him. farleigh slowly walked over, looming right over you. he purposefully placed his hand over yours that was holding the fridge door open, slowly closing it. he leaned down into the hollow of your neck and spoke calmly into your ear.
"i have my dessert right here." you shuddered, fully shuddered under the heavy aura of a man and exhaled shakily. you eyes subconsciously closed due to you his breath tickling your ear. the brunette was so gentle with you, slowly turning you around to face him. your back touched the face of fridge, chin tipped upwards to look at the abnormally tall man.
"sir–" you started, swallowing thickly from the anticipation.
"farleigh." he corrected in a slight weary tone, his gaze glossing over towards you.
"farleigh .." you whispered back in echo before meeting his eyes. his face inched towards yours slowly, as if he was silently asking for permission and your parted lips seemed to of given it to him. he kissed you gently, so gently it didn't startle you in any way. it was a smooth transition. his arms found your waist and yours cupped the sides of his face. farleighs tongue tasted of wine and slight accents from dinner.
farleigh kissed you more confidently now, keeping the same soft pace. maybe it was the wine but he wanted to savor every moment of this, and every flavor of you. he heard the slightest meek moan from you, causing him to reach further down near your thighs. he swiftly picked you up and placed you on the island. a brief gasp escaped your lips from the new point of view, frankly enjoying it. you smiled softly at farleigh who also grinned at you before continuing to kiss you. you wrapped your arms around your boss's neck comfortably and pulled him closer with a quiet mewl. farleigh kept his hands at your waist, his hips sliding in between yours.
"fuck," farleigh hissed into your mouth. it surprised you to hear such a sharp word come from him. he was becoming impatient and picked you up again, walking out of the kitchen with you secured in his hands. "let's get out of here." you were dazed from the wine and heated makeout session but you were sure on where he was headed.
farleigh opened his bedroom door and shut it with his foot, gently placing you on the bed. you stared at him as he stared at you as he kneeled doen briefly to take your heels off. slipping off his own shoes, he threw his tie to the ground. he unbuttoned the rest of his shirt and began on his slacks. his hands were slender and clean with the slightest of veins against the surface of his skin. something about the way he swiftly undid his belt caused another heartbeat between your legs. you could see the tent in his slacks growing, slowly becoming shy. it had been a while for you, and a while for him. so truth be told, you were a little hesitant on becoming intimate.
"turn around for me?" he asked nicely, a smirk threatening to form. you rotate your body so you were sitting on your knees, feeling farleigh's lips on your nape. you gasped slowly, gripping the red duvet under your palms. mr.start continued to kiss and lick your nape and shoulder as he slowly unzipped your dress. his lips followed his fingers and went lower down your back as the dress opened up. your back slowly arched away but farleigh held you in place but your waist, enjoying your small whimpers and gasps as his mere touch.
god..
his hands peeled the dress off your body exposing your purple place bra and underwear. you felt incredibly bare now, crossing your arms over your torso.
"dont," started farleigh. "youre gorgeous, [y/n]." you blushed hard at his words, rotating to face him again. farleigh dropped his slacks to reveal his black briefs with a very prominent hard on, climbing into bed with you. farleigh slid between your legs, pressing his hips into yours. your gasp was cut short by him capturing your lips against, kissing you more eagerly this time. the sound of his groans and your lips detaching and reattaching made you even hornier. you honestly can't remember the last time you had sex and so you were pretty excited yourself.
"farleigh– ..sir–" you tried between kisses. but farleigh wanted to devour you right then and there. he limited himself not to scare you away, so he kept things a medium level of intimacy. he kissed you till you were light headed and allowed his hand to slide down your stomach, in between your underwear to your core. the feeling of his digits pressed up against your pulsing clit made you fully pulled away from his kisses to throw your head back. it was the slightest of touches to come but god did it send a shiver down your spine.
his fingers began encircling your clit, carefully watching your facial expressions. the way your brows furrowed and your lips parted. how you tried your best to keep your sounds down to whimpers and stutters. "let them out, [y/n]. there's no one here but me." he murmured into your neck. as if that was a warning in itself, farleigh wasted no time in entering a finger. your eyes widened at the sudden penetration and your hips nearly lurched at the new wave of pleasure.
"s-shit–.." you seethed. your whimpers heightened in sound and farleighs other hand held your head as he added another, watching your bodily reaction. he loved it.
"you're doing so good, [y/n]. watch with me." he requested, tapping your cheek with his thumb. you forced yourself to focus your rolling eyes and look between each other's bodies. you watched his long, smooth fingers pump you slowly, your walls constricting against them. your eyes briefly met his and a smile appeared on his lips. feeling flustered again and you threw your head back once more.
"ah ah, i didn't say you could look away." farleigh asserted, gently picking your head off the pillow and directing it forwards yours and his hips again. you continued to watch, with your eyes glossing over with tears of pleasure as farleigh fingered you deeply. your moans became more prominent now, basically sucking his fingers in. you needed this, you needed him. farleigh then slowly pulled his fingers out before making eye contact with you, licking his fingers clean.
thats ...so hot.
he then went and took off your underwear, along with his. while you tried your best to not show surprise, his laugh confirmed that you failed. he was big, and long.
"i'll go slow, dont worry." he reassured, rubbing his warm, pulsing cock between your already soaked second pair of lips. maybe it was the wine but your body radiated with pleasure. even with him rubbing up against you, felt amazing. you caught yourself rolling your hips too, the sight turning farleigh on even more.
"ready?" asked the curly brunette. you gulped and nodded, focusing on his cock lining up with your entrance.
"no, [y/n]. look at me. i wanna see every expression you make as i enter you." farleighs fingers securely held your jaw up to look at him and him only. the lewd sight between your hips was now in your lower peripheral. be penetrated slowly through your folds, your jaw dropped slowly at the slight burn of being stretch mixing with the warmth of longing pleasure.
"farleigh–" you gasped, staring solely into his eyes. farleigh himself bit down on his lip as he entered you. you were wet, and tight. and he had* to bite down harder onto his lip to stop himself from ramming into you. from the day he met you, he was smitten by you. farleigh wanted you, and it was only a matter of time before he decided he was going to get you.
"i know baby ..you're doing so good.." he groaned tenderly. your eyes unforgivingly glanced down at the sight and he caught it.
"focus, [y/n]. on me." he cooed. your moans got loud as he filled you inch by inch.
"there you go, good girl.." your eyes rolled back at the pet name, the whimpers escaping uncontrollably now.
"ah ah, you're doing so good. cmon now, " he continued to coax, finally pulling back for the first thrust.
"yes, [y/n], good good girl.." you let out a broken moan, then another, and another. oh god you nearly wanted to shatter beneath him already. he was filling you so much. a tear trailed down and farleigh immediately kissed it away.
"i-it feels ..so good, farleigh–" you mewled. you stared at him with such a submissive gaze, all teary eyed and trembling under such a man.
mr.start pressed his body against yours with his hands securing themselves deep in the duvet. he lengthened his thrusts, rolling his hips faster and he listened to your lust-filled sounds. he began to leave several red, pink, and purple colored love marks everywhere on your skin while fucking you deeply.
mr.start fucked you steadily, watching your body buck and pull in pure bliss. you'd angle your hips upwards, farleighs cock rubbing right on your sweet spot. your walls convulsed and your gasps got lighter with a more staccato rhythm.
"oh god ..oh god–!" you cried. your walls convulsed and you came quickly and sudden. you suctioned around farleigh, orgasming intensely. your hips bucked with eager and it didn't help how mr.start continued fucking you through your orgasm.
"h'ah– [y/n]– oh fuck.." moaned farleigh. your orgasm set a chain reaction to his climax. his large hands secured themselves atop of your hip bone and continued fucking you through your orgasm as well as his. by this time, both of your legs trembled uncontrollably, and a wave of embarrassment washed over. you put the back of your arm over your mouth and one hand on your thigh, trying to control yourself. farleigh exhaled deeply, smiling at you before quickly realizing your state. he made sure to stay still as he placed his large hand on your thigh. his eyes presented concern.
"did i go too rough, [y/n]? are you okay?" he questioned, kissing your cheek in affection. you flushed a pink and shook your head.
"n-no ..you were ..perfect. shaky legs usually mean a good sign, sir." farleigh 'ohh'ed' softly at your response, beginning to chuckle. then the smuggest of smirks plastered across his face and he winked, slowly beginning to remove himself from you. as he exited you, you felt as if you could relax a bit more now, forcing yourself to breath slowly. you fully laid back on the pillows, your shaking legs dying down to a subtle tremor in muscle.
the brunette went to the bathroom and your ears caught the sound of running water. farleigh came back with a small green, presumably wet towel. you flinched softly at the cold wet cloth but relaxed soon at the temperature difference. farleigh wiped you down from your neck, down your stomach and cleaned the mess between your legs. he wiped himself down with the other side of the towel before dropping it on the floor and laying back with you.
his arms engulfed you, the covers entangling themselves between the two of you. you gazed into his eyes and he stared into yours, stroking the side of your cheek.
"i enjoy your company, sweetheart. stay with me for a bit." farleigh suddenly said. your heart jumped, but you immediately smiled. you scooted your body closer and nuzzled into his chest.
"of course, farleigh.”
© r4vn , do not copy my work.
hope u enjoyed! ♡♡
#raven writes#archie madekwe writer#farleigh saltburn#farleigh start fic#farleigh catton#farleigh start smut#farleigh x reader#farleigh start#farleigh x you#saltburn smut#saltburn fanfiction#saltburn x reader#saltburn
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Monster. (m)
synopsis. You’ll never love him, no matter what.
warnings. YANDERE, ABUSIVE BEHAVIOUR, CHOKING, LOTS OF CURSING, DEGRADATION, slut shaming, psychotic behaviour, delusional behaviour, unhealthy behaviour, mentions of killing.
disclaimer. PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT ROMANTICISE THIS FUCKED UP BEHAVIOUR, this is extremely toxic and not at all romantic. This is purely fictional and it does not represent bts’ jungkook at all.
viewer discretion is HEAVILY ADVISED AS THIS FIC CONTAINS DARK CONTENT THAT CAN BE TRIGGERING.
“Fucking whore!”
His eyes are wild, the vein in his neck popping out as he slams you into the alley wall, the darkness fails to hide his eyes that are burning holes into your soul.
“SLUT.” His hands reach your neck and he grabs at it tightly, you cannot stop crying. His grip hurts, it’s a struggle for you to breathe.
But the monster doesn’t care.
His voice rings in your ears, yet no one comes to your rescue.
“What’d I tell you?!” He leans his face closer, his eyes are cold, his jaw is clenched, you can see the anger in his eyes.
“Whore!” He screams again at you. His tall figure is overpowering and you cannot defend yourself, you feel suffocated.
“Stupid bitch! Do you just go flirting around with anyone?!” You hate him. He has no right to act this way.
You don’t deserve this.
“Didn’t I warn you?” He slams his other hand at the wall, startling you, you whimper pathetically.
He doesn’t care.
“I’m going to kill him and gut him right in front your eyes because your stupid little brain doesn’t understand!” He growls, his grip loosens when you whimper out a small please.
“I-I hate you!” You cough violently, attempting to push him away, you hated him so much.
He deserved to burn in hell.
“I never cared!” He laughs, fucking maniac.
“L-Let me go!” You cry once again. “I DONT W-WANT YOU!” You try to get away from him but he’s quick to trap you again.
“Shut your slutty little mouth!” He grabs you by the shoulder, “y-you’re hurting me!”
“What about my heart huh?” He ignores you once again.
“You are mine. I warned you so many times, YN, but you never listen, are you really that much of a whore for a dick!?!”
His words are piercing. But what can you expect from a spoiled psychotic bastard like him.
He doesn’t own you.
“Shut the fuck up Jeon! I’ll never fuck someone like you, you’re psychotic!”
You bite back and that takes him by surprise, his eyes get wide open at your insult. “You are abusive! I’ll never want you, I’d rather die!” You spit at him.
“Are you going to hit me now huh? That’s all you can do really!” It’s your turn to glare at him, his hands leave your body, he’s speechless.
You roll your eyes at him.
“Pathetic bastard, you’ll never have me.” His body is frozen, you don’t move too, glaring at him.
You hate him so much.
“This is not love at all, people like you can never know what’s it like to love and be loved.”
“PSYCHO.” You cannot bring yourself to stop insulting him, you’ve had enough. And before you can stop yourself, you slap him.
“BURN IN HELL.”
He don’t spare him another glance before you grab your bag and leave him standing there.
You’ll never love him.
#jungkook smut#yandere bts#jjk smut#yandere jjk#yandere x reader#jungkook x reader#jungkook ff#jungkook fanfic#jungkook angst#yandere jungkook#yandere smut#smut#jeongguk smut#jungkook x you#jungkook fanfiction
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kinktober day one - the angel and the ghost stu macher !wxm!
summary
-> yn goes to a party with her sister and friends, when she asks where the bathroom is only to be faced with a ma in a ghost face costume. confused she follows his demands only to find out that it isn't the person she thought it was.
⚠︎ disclaimer; this is 18+, so mdni.. I will be keeping an aye out on everything but again I dont care if you read this and you are underage you are the only one responsible for reading shit you aren't supposed too.
content warnings - knife play, swearing, underage drinking, alcohol, underage partying.
pairing - young!stumacher x young!reader (please note that consent was given!)
word count - 662
authors note - welcome to the first kinktober, please be kind to me! if you have a request please send them in I know that my requests are closed for normal fics but!!! I will open them for KINKTOBER REQUESTS ONLY! anyways please enjoy and let me know what you think xx
I stand in front of the full-length mirror, my bedroom a chaotic mess around me. The scattered clothes and makeup bottles are a reflection of my indecisive state. Outside, the faint sounds of music and laughter can be heard, tempting me to give in and attend Stu's infamous Halloween party.
My sister Sidney barges into my room, dressed as a seductive devil and looking stunning as ever. She tries to convince me to come with her, offering to lend me her spare wings. But I can't shake the feeling that I look terrible in my planned costume - a sexy angel.
"I don't think I'm going," I sigh, glancing at myself critically in the mirror.
"Don't be ridiculous," Sidney says, coming closer and placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "You look absolutely amazing, don't let your own insecurities hold you back."
Reluctantly, I agree to go and quickly change into my costume. As we arrive at Stu's house, the sight of drunk teenagers stumbling around fills me with unease. But I put on a brave face and join in the festivities, grabbing a drink from the overcrowded kitchen.
As I wander through the crowded house, trying to avoid the rowdy party-goers, I find myself accidentally stumbling into Stu's bedroom. And there, standing in front of me is someone wearing Billy's iconic ghost face costume. My sister's boyfriend.
"Billy? This isn't funny," I try to laugh it off, but he doesn't respond.
He steps closer to me, his eyes filled with primal desire. My heart races as he runs his hand down my face and then down to my breasts, where he stops and looks back up at me with hunger in his eyes. In a moment of recklessness, I give him a nod of approval.
With one swift motion, he grabs me and throws me onto his messy bed, pulling out a knife and teasingly tracing it down my body as he slowly strips me of my angel costume. My heart pounds with fear and excitement as he takes control, leaving me vulnerable and exposed in only my white dress and heels.
He rips my dress off in a frenzy, his eyes wild with lust as he exposes my soaked panties. With a glinting knife in hand, he cuts them off with a sharp motion, sending shivers down my spine. My head falls back in submission as I see the throbbing outline of his cock and feel a surge of desire course through me.
In a low, commanding voice, I tell him to put it in and he obeys without hesitation. His rough hands guide himself to my wetness and he slowly pushes inside, filling me completely. A guttural moan escapes my lips as he starts moving with powerful thrusts, each one eliciting primal grunts from under his mask. Our bodies merge into one, our moans and heavy breathing filling the room.
Suddenly, he pulls out and roughly flips me onto my hands and knees. Without warning, he slams back into me, his movements becoming faster and more intense. Our cries of pleasure echo off the walls as we reach our peak together, collapsing in a tangled mess on the bed.
As he pulls up his pants and leaves me alone in the room, I can't help but smile at the rush of adrenaline and satisfaction coursing through my body. Adjusting my dress and fixing my appearance, I confidently make my way downstairs to rejoin my sister and friends.
Curiosity burning in her eyes, Sidney asks where I went. With a sly smirk, I reply that I got caught up talking with some girls from the cheer team in the bathroom. Stu hands me drink and thanks me for the quickie before adding with a knowing wink that it was amazing. My stunned expression reveals that I had no idea it was him until now, but the memory of our intense encounter lingers in my mind as the night continues on.
do not translate, copy, publish or edit my works without permission. © bunnie 2024-25
#scream#billy loomis#stu macher#sidney prescott#Tatum riley#x reader#scream 1996#scream smut#scream x reader#scream movie#scream franchise#x female reader#horror#billy loomis x reader#reader insert#fem reader#ghostface x reader
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So like everyone i have thoughts on the usamericans leaving tiktok for a few hours (short disclaimer the circumstance in which that happend are in every way horrofic distopian and i am not say they should banned from tiktok this is not what this is about) it made me realise how much us content is being shoved down my throat every day on the internet and that i don’t like it.
This started early on when i was watching youtubers like early smosh and the likes and it helped me learn english and my overall internet presence has always centered mainly around usamerican creators which i did enjoy. But now for the first time me, and a lot of other people around the world wondered what a big mainstream socila media platform would look like without that and it was a nice thought. Fact is that all the space these creators take up, they take away from other people from other countries and it makes those spaces lack diversity.
I saw a video from a few people saying that their content was being pushed out way more in those hours and as soon as the usamericans returned it stopped.
I am a big advocate of shaping your own internet experience by searching for specific interests/communities etc and i do but i don’t want usamerican content to be the default that i have to actively get away from in favour of my own community.
I am not american i don’t want to know every little thing about their politics and their drama and still it is being pushed on me. There were elections in my country a few weeks back and it was a shit show and we still don’t have a new president and i realised how little i knew about the politics going on in my own country.
This is not about blame or hate it’s just about the realisation how much space the usa has taken up in my mind and in these online spaces, disproportionatly to the rest of the world. I just wish it were more balanced.
It’s wild how some usamericans react to this discourse, of course you can’t relate because for the first time this wasn’t about you and the rest of the world is not in debt to you to watch you and only you. And those who are upset about the mean things the others say to you, maybe ask yourselves why they say it.
Fuck this us cyber imperialism idgaf what the names of all the states are and how your electoral system works and who said what on fox news as long as i dont get that same level of information about my own community let alone the rest of the world. You are not the status quo and there is a rest of the world i would love to discover as organically as your stuff is being shown to me.
Also it has shifted things like discourse about racism in europe so much. For example this black and white categorization does not work in europe and still i hear my own communities talk like that. The concept of black as it exists in the usa and has been shaped there by history gets lost in “translation” to european discourse because we have a different history and not to say that black people don’t have a hard time but that’s not the end of the story. By american standards i am white but i come from eastern europe, living in western europe i have faced discrimination, it is not only about the color of your skin and i hate that this debate has been simplified so much in favour of these us centric talking points.
The culture is seeping into everything and it’s exhausting because it takes away from actual conversations that we could and should have not only when it comes to racism but about culture as well.
If feel like part of that us culture is reducing things to “trends” and “theories” and commodifying other cultures. (What the fuck do you mean “balkan breakfast” and then eating random raw uncut veggies) it’s not sharing culture it’s a bastardasation of that in the persuit of hyperindividualism. The homeland of kapitalism on crack, it takes things from other cultures and twists them into marketable, bitesized trends.
It would have been nice to see what could have been.
This is no individuals shortcoming or fault. It’s a culture that has been cultivated by a deeply kapitalist and imperialistic country.
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100 days of productivity - 6/100
jan 22, 2025.
✔ went to class ✔ washed my dishes ✔ meal prepped! ✔ put away groceries ✔ troubleshooted an issue with my fridge to my landlord
(more under the cut - warning for very long and kind of negative)
today's the first day of classes (where i'm a student)! i'm taking combinatorics, group theory, and algebraic topology.
the profs for algtop and group theory were... okay, i guess. i dont doubt they are very knowledgeable about their field, and the lecture content was all fine and good, but the presentation i fear was not so good. my algtop professor waffled on about inconsequential things that only made sense to him for probably half of the entire lecture (random jokes and pedantic clarifications that depend entirely on your specialty that, frankly, while i understand their place, the slight difference in convention between algebraists and geometers doesn't mean very much to me as somebody who is not that familiar with either field). and the group theory prof, he spoke too quietly and the entire class could barely read his handwriting.
also, i fear that i've come down with a cold or a fever, so even though i got a lot done, i felt pretty bad all day. i felt okay this morning but i still wore a mask. another grad student asked me why i was wearing one, and i told them i was worried i got exposed to some sickness, since i was feeling under the weather.
i was started to overheat and get overstimulated just from my combo prof's voice .-. and she was the only good lecturer i had today! straightforward, concise, and had briefly humorous moments that didn't detract from the rest of the lecture.
overall i've been feeling less than great, but getting as much as i have done today makes me feel better. posting, cleaning, cooking - all these things help ground me in some semblance of reality.
(begin cw: us politics)
it's probably because i'm sick, but i can't deny that trump's inauguration -- specifically how a lot of people are panicking about it -- is weighing on me. i really hate how little i know about anything. palestine-israel was what got me to seriously think about politics for the first time. of course i remember what i learned in high school history class, and as an ethnically han chinese person i paid attention to BLM and stop asian hate, but i didn't really think critically. my history classes didn't seem relevant when i was taking them, but of course they're relevant; the history is the context for what i'm living now.
eventually i was going to grow up and fend for myself and the people i care about in this country. i never realized that somehow. i have been so naive and ignorant.
it seems that everybody else has long understood what has been going on, with everything. but now my friends are panicking and i don't know what i'm supposed to worry about or not. when news articles and social media become untrustworthy, you need to rely on yourself - your own knowledge and critical thinking. unfortunately, i forgot to do that growing up...
(acknowledgement and disclaimer) i'm in a better position than most. the fact that i'm just worried about being informed is nothing compared to the others currently losing/have lost their homes, jobs, reproductive care access, their dignity (transgender inmates being forced to detransition), etc. so i don't mean to say all this to mean i'm genuinely panicking about living in trump's america. i just have a fever and i'm more stressed than i should be about the weight of my privilege and resulting responsibility if i want to call myself an ally/leftist/whatever.
(/end cw)
in any case.... i like to finish these things on a positive note so i'll keep writing.
i have to teach tomorrow morning at 8:30am :/ last time i barely spent any time reviewing/teaching summation notation to the class. i just showed them the anatomy of the notation and did one example, but for some it's their first time seeing that, so i should be spending more time on it.
after teaching, well, i wanted to sit in on riemannian geometry but if i still feel shitty tomorrow then i might just go home... i have textbook chapters to read and review so that'll keep me occupied while im not at school.
i'm taking a couple mg of melatonin as i'm writing this sentence. i need to rest. bye~
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⚠️DISCLAIMERS⚠️
please dont be mean !
not all pictures or videos are mine. i get them from instagram, tiktok, twitter and pinterest. if i know the source, i’ll credit the author!! if you want me to take a post down or credit you, please dm or comment!
i apologize for using random tags for my posts. i add them FOR REACH just like most people on this app do. whenever i myself search for something, i find unrelated stuff because of the tags BUT I DONT SEND sarcastic, mean, aggressive comments to the ones that misuse them…
PLEASE dont take everything i say too seriously. some posts are really not that deep. don’t send me paragraphs like “um op, you are clearly uneducated and [insert insults] and you should stop posting, you have no idea what are you talking ab etc”*. i have no ill intentions, i apologize if it seems like that but, again, some posts rly arent that deep.
*(for example i made a post where i joked about annoying radiohead fans and someone got really mad and send me a bunch of messages and stuff)
i dont like when people pull the “im a minor🥺” card, but i do feel uncomfortable when i see grown ass adults picking up fights with ME, a 16 year old. i know i can make mistakes and i appreciate when people correct/call me out! BUT if you are IN YOUR 30s calling me all sorts of names over a dumb photo, text, tag or whatever, then i’ll just block you.
also i understand that the whole girlblogger lana del rey coquette thing is low key cringe, corny and annoying but most of my posts do align with this genre (and that’s why i usually use the girlhood femcel etc tags!). if you dont like this type of content then just dont interact with my posts.
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NGE schizo rant with hints of lain💀:
Disclaimer: ooo my belief correct ooo my monkey interpretation is fact, but no to be fr this is just my take and ramblings on 2 very amazing insightful shows that I hope continue to grow in popularity. I hope the topics they cover force all to have a deep introspective about themselves and the world we live in.
Been thinking about how bits of asukas mother was absorbed within her Eva, same being said for shinjis but even more so and how that bond between the Angelical body and human soul is what gives the Eva's the ability to be on even standing with the angels, they're essentially nephilim, a mixture of humanity's consciousness but possess the deity like strength and body of the angels. [Hence why NERV has to drug them up and keep them sedated, they've got unmanigable human emotions in there]...
I don't care what hideaki goes back on- this story is a spiritual philosophical take on humanity that uses religious symbolism to portray man and the idea that the self [the "I"] creates a barrier for connection. We are all alone in this world because of flesh[much like the belief that Eiri Masami has in lain], we have a hole that is never filled constantly seeking out for more all the way up until it destroys us[for example, the reason the 2nd impact happened]. Kaworu actually realizes this about us, and that is why he determines we are not worth further inspection, he was the angels last ditch attempt at understanding humans. We are deeply emotional and troubled beings just looking for something we feel is missing. Humans are alone, our expansive consciousness and awareness sees to that, we *think* too much for our own good and because of this we are never satisfied and desperately seek deep connection to scratch the itch that can't be reached.
I'd say the message in NGE is the opposite of lains, Watching them back to back was such an odd experience. Lains whole idea is that no matter where anything or anyone is we are connected through a vibrational atomic stream of consciousness. The wired is a small fraction of what already exists in our day to day reality. For as along as humanity has had awareness, we have been connected, it is what we all share.
Too reiterate- The creation of the wired is just a smaller scaled version of what already exists between us, we are all interlinked because of thought, the destructive you and I that language creates doesn't matter because what connects us isn't such, it's our energy our vibration our soul(consciousness) isn't physical it is vibrational and touches all, it is infinite. Lain even hints at the idea that we are the universe experiencing itself, which if thats the case it is impossible for us not be connected, it would make us one.
I deeply love both of these shows and am hesitant to watch the rebuilds and even the end of evangalion, I know the reason they were made was to try and fix up what people thought to be a confusing poorly written story and ending, the lack of understanding had from the audience kinda forced hideaki to come up with some BS and that saddens me because I feel the message of the orginal show has so much insight into him as a creator and the personal turmoil he def goes through. He forces you to think about disturbing and sad concepts but in the end this consideration of the world makes you grow as a person. Hideaki has a perspective of the universe that I personally dont share, im more lainpilled if anything, but that didn't stop me from loving what he was trying to grasp at.
So are we alone separated by flesh or connected through an incomprehensible soul made up of contents unseen to humanity? We have no clue but it's for sure fun to think abt.
evangelion
#nge#eva unit 01#evangelion#neon genesis evangelion#neon genesis kaworu#neon genesis asuka#shinji ikari#serial experiments lain#lain iwakura#lets all love lain#lain#laincore#eva unit 02#hideaki anno
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I DIG YOUR CINEMA (4)
harry styles x yn aspiring filmmaker — social media AU
I am actually a little bit nervous about this part, so I hope you enjoy it.
About the smau: yn starts posting videos on youtube and is trying to build a career as a filmmaker. Things are going pretty well for her and she starts getting more attention when she creates content about shows she goes to. She’s also a fan of Harry’s music and some of his fans start getting suspicious when his team starts interacting with her.
Disclaimer: The story it’s set in 2021 and it will follow their relationship through the LOT leg in the US. Since this is nothing but fiction, I will be following some of the real timeline but also adding my own stuff. On top of that, I won’t be basing myself on Harry’s actual posts.
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PART 3 — DENVER // MASTERLIST
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I DIG YOUR CINEMA (PART 4) — THE VIDEO
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liked by bestfriend, anthonypham, mollyjane_x and 59,302 others
yourinstagram im sorry its taken me so long to show up. i thought time would give me the ability to find some words to say, but as it turns out im much better at telling things through a camera than through a pen (or a keyboard, in this case). when i posted my first video on youtube, all i wanted was to find myself again after finally getting free from a relationship that drained the fun out of me. making movies is something that ive always been passionate about, so i thought — why not? three months later, when i posted my first video at a concert, all i wanted was to tell the story of a woman who, after raising two kids and giving everything she had to make everyone around her happy and safe, finally had the opportunity to make one of her most “innocent” dreams (seeing shania twain) come true. fast forward to this week, as i post my latest video all i want is to tell the story of a man who has the entire world in the palm of his hand and yet lives his life as if he’s merely another ordinary soul on earth. what happens now, and what you do with this story (or with any other ive already told), its not up to me anymore.
that all being said, thank you harry for trusting me with this story. it wasn’t mine to tell, but you allowed me to do it anyway and i’ll always be grateful for that. so, again, thank you.
ok i will stop typing now.
actually, im just gonna add that i hope you all enjoy this video as much as i do (but if you don’t, thats fair, and i’ll accept it just as much)
ok, now im done :)
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lookitsnyoh 👑👑👑👑👑 harryfan9 this was so much more than we’ve asked for 🙏🙏🙏 user1 its been almost 24 hours since you posted this video and im still 😲!! YOU’RE INCREDIBLE user5 absolutely amazing! unexpected, captivating, touching… 10/10! yourbrother Kinda sucks that I don’t even feel like teasing you this time. I’m just proud.
↳ sisterinlaw Printed and framed already. ↳ yourinstagram … i dont even know what to say right now ↳ yourinstagram @sisterinlaw i’ll need a copy of that pls
harryfan your mind is so brilliant im so in love with this and i know i speak for the entire fandom when i say: THANK YOU 😭
↳ harryfan5 no really bc we’re so used to getting practically nothing that she coulve just done anything and we would’ve still died… and yet she gave us THIS? ↳ harryfan7 yn deserves the best in life period ↳ harryfan54 c’mon… it’s not THAT good
harrystyles 😲 so this was my story you were telling?
↳ yourinstagram i kept my side of the promise, didnt i? you were supposed to keep yours ↳ harrystyles fair enough. you’re welcome x ↳ yourinstagram 😌😌😌😌😌 ↳ yourinstagram thank you ↳ harrystyles you’re welcome x ↳ harryfan25 OMFGDSGFUAGFBH ↳ harryfan11 @yourinstagram @harrystyles sorry guys do you want us to leave you two alone? ↳ harryfan51 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 ↳ harryfan17 wdym you kept your side of the promise??? what did you promise????? what is it?????
harryfan10 pls we need more harry content already user7 Don’t go missing again, we miss you here!
Sep 9, 2021 •
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liked by yourinstagram, bestfriend, jefezoff and 5,187,031 others
harrystyles I’m honored to say @yourinstagram has turned the beginning of this new chapter into a lovely short-movie, one you can watch right now on her youtube channel.
Thank you Yn for being so caring and respectful about everything and everyone involved in this project. To watch this idea turn into reality has been nothing but inspiring.
Welcome to the team, it’s too late to back out now. x
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bestfriend this moment is all mine. 20+ years of friendship are FINALLY paying off.
↳ user3 you’re so unserious i love it fgajdujn ↳ yourinstagram im doing it just for you <3
harryfan5 noooooo I can’t do this my heart can’t take it pls stop 😭😭 harryfan23 I CANT BELIEVE YNS FIRSTS WORDS TO HIM WERE SHUT THE FUCK UP HAHAHAHAHA annetwist What a wonderful job you’ve done dear @yourinstagram 🥰
↳ yourinstagram ❤️ ↳ harryfan54 🙄
harryfan66 who are you and what have you done to the real harry? 🧐
↳ harryfan14 for real tho lmao ↳ harryfan74 yup. ive been saying it: another strategy just to get a random famous on harrys back. as usual.
harryfan9 NOT HARRY EXPOSING THE FIRST TIME THEY TALKED????
↳ harryfan3 and the fact that HE texted her first??? ↳ harryfan9 pls!!! molly gave me your nUmBeR 🤪🤪
harryfan15 oh you’re so sick for this AHDUAJHDJ yourinstagram THOSE messages? REALLY???
↳ harrystyles I’ve been explicitly forbidden to post a picture with you so I had to improvise. ↳ yourinstagram ok but did you also have to conveniently leave my next message out of it? ↳ harrystyles Yes x.
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PART 5: FROM SAN ANTONIO
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#harry styles fake ig#harry styles fake instagram#harry styles fake social media#harry styles smau#harry styles social media au#harry styles writing#harry styles#harry styles blurb#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fic#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n
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