#the director is the only one who has a modicum of good sense but I dont want to help the ratings when the rest of the team is a shitshow

[kindasleepycryptid]

Lmfao im going to see movies with friends and the double features made it so that we had to either A. Watch it ends with us or B. Watch a horror movie

And id rather pay twice to go to each movie we actually wanted individually than to be forced to watch it ends with us

[introvertguide]

Duck Soup (1933); AFI #60

The next film on the AFI top 100 is a throwback to before the Golden Age of Hollywood when "talkies" were new, Duck Soup (1933). This film was the last attached to a 5 feature contract that the Marx Brothers had with Paramount pictures. It was moderately well received at the time but has since become the most critically acclaimed of the Marx Brothers films. The movie is only 68 minutes and is absolutely packed with gags. It is not, however, packed with a storyline or plot. I want to very briefly go over the summary because that is not what this movie is known for. Let's unnecessarily start with...

SPOILER ALERT? THIS MOVIE HAS NO PLOT. IT IS ALL ABOUT SITE GAGS AND SET PIECES. READ AWAY!!! IT WILL NOT DO ANYTHING TO HURT THE EXPERIENCE!!!

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The film starts off with the wealthy Mrs. Teasdale (Margaret Dumont) insisting that a man that she is sweet on, Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho), be appointed leader of the small, bankrupt country of Freedonia before she will continue to provide much-needed financial aid. Meanwhile, neighboring Sylvania is attempting to annex the country. Sylvanian ambassador Trentino (Louis Calhem) tries to foment a revolution and to woo Mrs. Teasdale, and he tries to dig up dirt on Firefly by sending in spies Chicolini (Chico) and Pinky (Harpo).

After failing to collect useful information against Firefly, Chicolini and Pinky are able to infiltrate the government when Chicolini is appointed Secretary of War after Firefly sees him selling peanuts outside his window. Meanwhile, Firefly's secretary, Bob Roland (Zeppo), suspects Trentino's motives, and he advises Firefly to get rid of Trentino by insulting him. Firefly agrees to the plan, but after a series of personal insults exchanged between Firefly and Trentino, the plan backfires when Firefly slaps Trentino instead of being slapped by him. As a result, the two countries come to the brink of war. Adding to the international friction is the fact that Firefly is also courting Mrs. Teasdale, and, like Trentino, hoping to get his hands on her late husband's wealth.

Trentino learns from his femme fatale spy, Vera Marcal (Raquel Torres), that Freedonia's plans of war are in Mrs. Teasdale's safe and tells her to assist Chicolini and Pinky in stealing them. Chicolini is caught by Firefly and put on trial, during which war is officially declared, and everyone is overcome by war frenzy, breaking into song and dance. Chicolini and Pinky join Firefly and Bob Roland in anarchic battle, resulting in general mayhem.

After a fierce battle, the end of the film finds Trentino caught in a makeshift pillory, with the Brothers pelting him with fruit. Trentino surrenders, but Firefly tells him to wait until they run out of fruit. Mrs. Teasdale begins singing the Freedonia national anthem in her operatic voice and the Brothers begin hurling fruit at her instead.

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There are many exceptionally good and bad aspects of this film. On the good side, there are a couple of amazing set pieces that the Marx Brothers did like no other. The mirror scene in which Groucho and Harpo stand in front of each other and Harpo perfectly mimics his brother's movements was outstanding. Specifically, there is a point where Groucho stands outside the reflection and moves in a ridiculous way past what he thinks is a reflection. The mirroring between the brothers is exceptional. Add in the same dressing gown and cap to the actual resemblance (they are full actual brothers) makes for quite an effect. This mirror gag was first done on film by Charlie Chaplin almost 15 years earlier, but this is likely the most well known and best done example of the bit by real people. It was repeated by Bugs Bunny, Mickey Mouse, The Pink Panther, Tom and Jerry, Scooby-Doo, and the Smurfs. That kind of mirror quality action was only repeatable through animation, apparently.

The constant wardrobe changes during the frenzied war scene have caused full speculative articles to be written. Groucho starts out in a Union officer suit, then appears in a Confederate officer suite, then a British palace guard uniform, and then in what looks to be a boy scout officer suit, and finally a Davy Crockett hat? The deep cynicism and anti-war sentiment of the brothers was blatant. It is summed up by the line "while you're out out there risking life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in here thinking what a sucker you are." The United States had just gotten out of a war and many militaristic leads felt the need to show off. This lack of care after feeling so dominant following WW1 was the mindset that in part led to the Stock Market crash and the Great Depression. There was turmoil brewing in Europe and many Americans wanted nothing to do with it after seeing so many young boys getting ripped apart by trench warfare and machine gun fire. The brothers were satirizing all of those figures that we use to teach boys to want to fight for their country. They also went after what they believed were the causes of many wars: money and moral indignation between powerful men.

Although the film gives the audience insight into the mindset of much of the population during those extremely turbulent times between wars, it also boasts some of the most unsophisticated humor of a new visual medium. The silly songs do not translate well and sound like something created by a child. With truly clever artists like Frank Zappa, the Dead Kennedys, and national treasure Weird Al Yankovic, the Marx Brother's songs just sound lame to me. I think the same of Groucho's one liners. With comedians like Mitch Hedberg, Paula Poundstone, Steven Wright, and Jimmy Carr, the work of Groucho Marx feels seriously dated and quite cringy.

The real let down for me in this particular film was the fighting between Harpo and the Lemonade salesman. In fact, the character of Pinkie was "The Joker" levels of psychotic. I know he represented the constant undermining of communism. That is fine and makes a good point. Practically speaking, though, he reveled in causing problems for no reason and he was a constant nuisance. I have been around a lot of teachers and they sat that students who act like that are the bane of everyone's existence. It may be witty, but it is not funny. I have seen movies like Borat and Jackass, who are at least very creative in the way they cause problems and mostly harm themselves. I legitimately hate the character of Pinky and find him devoid of any real humor beyond the mirror scene. I also realize that Chicolini is a play on Mussolini, but I didn't really find him funny either. I want to emphasize that these are my opinions and I welcome comments on why Pinkie and Chicolini are hilarious.

There are some things that I do forgive and almost find charming. Directors from the silent film era had to emphasize that their actors over dramatize their lines so that the audience could get even a modicum of tone. This over-the-top dramatic speaking continued with many actors into the era of talking pictures. You can tell that this film was made near the change over because a lot of the actors talk like they are making one continual speech. Just about everyone is projecting for the cheap seats, and I totally appreciate it and smile. I also appreciate that the Marx Brothers absolutely jam pack the film with gags. I don't think many of the gags are funny, but I acknowledge that the movie is 68 minutes of constant jokes and the Marx Brothers made a concerted effort to give their audience the most bang for their buck. Good for them.

So does this movie belong on the AFI top 100? I am actually going to say no. I think that Horse Feathers is a funnier film and has the iconic football scene that got a screen cap on the cover of Time magazine. If the AFI was going to choose a Paramount produced Marx Brothers film, this one seems to me to only be second or third choice of the five. Would I recommend it? Sure. It is definitely dated and the jokes will not make a lot of sense any more, but some of the scenes have become iconic and it is fun to see what has been so heavily referenced in current media. It is a pretty fun movie to sit back and just experience for an hour, so I would give it a shot.

[fearsmagazine]

SETTLERS - Review

DISTRIBUTOR: IFC Midnight

SYNOPSIS: On a remote homestead amongst the Martian frontier, a refugee family from Earth clings to hope for a better life. But when strangers appear in the surrounding hills and attempt to run them off, nine-year-old Remmy is faced with the desperate reality her mother and father have tried so hard to keep from her.

REVIEW: SETTLERS is a hybrid of a science fiction movie with classic western plot devices. There are very few original films that did it well, and only “Outland (‘’81),” ��Prospect (‘18)” and “Silent Running (‘72)” realized their goals in blending both genres successfully. For all the tech and hardware, a good science fiction film allows the viewer to examine the human condition in a new light. SETTLERS is one of those films.

Wyatt Rockefeller’s screenplay is a complex character driven narrative. He does an excellent job of introducing each one and slowly peels back their layers so we come to know them, understand them. They are an unlikely group who are brought together for a simple reason, but the frightening larger consequences he hints at, leaving our imagination to dwell on it. At the core of the story is Remmy, a child who has never known earth and is raised on stories about the home planet of her parents. Even though she has been raised in this harsh environment she still has a child’s sense of curiosity and wonder. The adults in the tale are presented as desperate survivors. However, the character of Jerry holds the knowledge and expertise to possibly this lost homestead. This small island of hope is housed under a dome that keeps it secluded from the rest of the planet. Given the heaviness of the story, Rockefeller injects a bit of comic relief with the inclusion of a simple robot that is capable of presenting a limited, but effective, range of emotions.

As the viewer watches this tragedy unfold you can’t help but feel the connection to several issues we are facing today. They run the gambit of social, political, and environmental. Much like a child, Rockefeller never tips his hand to give us any explanation as to why some of the adults do what they do. What he does offer only feels like it is scratching the surface. There are many elephants in this story. The filmmaker offers the viewer little emotional release. Even the film’s ending is optimistic, but given things we’ve heard in the story it is certainly not hopeful. There are elements of the story that feel reminiscent of the 1961 “The Twilight Zone” episode “Two,” which was written and directed by Montgomery Pittman, starring Charles Bronson and Elizabeth Montgomery. For it being his first feature film, Rockefeller shows he has the talent to have worked alongside any of the writers of that classic series.

Rockefeller and his collaborators did an excellent job of creating the indoor and outdoor environments, and the rest of the area under this dome. You believe they are on mars. Granted they are in a desert, but there were no signs of any other life, except for the plants, in this landscape. I enjoyed the camera work and the editing, especially when it came to taking the viewer from a distant point and slowly brought us into the scene. The location and set dressing looked authentic to a you think an intergalactic settlement might look. They did an amazing job of setting the stage and creating the atmosphere, which they sustain throughout, so the viewer maintains their engagement in the drama.

I loved the performances. Young actress Brooklynn Prince has moments where she is delightful and powerful as she goes through this emotional character arch. All through her struggles she maintains an element of innocence that feels so organic. Actor Ismael Cruz Córdova is a powerhouse of emotions and intensity. You feel that he has a modicum of happiness in moments but there is this lingering tension and anxiety brewing just below the surface. You feel his sincerity of trying to make something good from the situation he is in. Sofia Boutella delivers this heart wrenching performance of a mother being torn apart by these conflicting emotions, rendering many of the character’s actions surprising, shocking, but never something we feel is outside the character’s motivations.

Subtly adding to the film’s complex emotional palette and the atmosphere is a great score by Nitin Sawhney. It is not a constant score throughout, but is nicely woven into the film.

Wyatt Rockefeller’s feature film debut SETTLERS is an impressive orchestration of story, visuals and performances. It is a compelling story that nicely blends the science fiction elements with the tragedy to create a timeless character study of survival in a harsh environment. With Mars looming as the potential new frontier, regardless of all our technical advances Rockefeller’s film presents a cautionary tale of what could happen if we fail to update the human condition before we venture forth. I am totally excited to she what he does with his next film.

CAST: Sofia Boutella, Ismael Cruz Córdova, Brooklynn Prince, Nell Tiger Free, and Jonny Lee Miller CREW: Director/Screenplay - Wyatt Rockefeller; Producers - Julie Fabrizio, Joshua Horsfield & Johan Kruger; Cinematographer - Willie Nel; Score - Nitin Sawhney; Editor - Johnny Daukes; ; Production Designer - Noam Piper; Costume Designer - Dihantus Engelbrecht; Robot & Special Effects - Millennium FX; Visual Effects - Mark Myburgh. OFFICIAL: N.A. FACEBOOK: N.A. TWITTER: N.A. TRAILER: https://youtu.be/jeCcJCy0HzM RELEASE DATE: IN Theaters and On Demand Friday, July 23rd, 2021

**Until we can all head back into the theaters our “COVID Reel Value” will be similar to how you rate a film on digital platforms - 👍 (Like), 👌 (It’s just okay),  or 👎 (Dislike)

Reviewed by Joseph B Mauceri

[robert-c]

Consultant or In House Professional

At one time or another I suppose most compensation professionals have wondered what it would be like to be one of those consultants that their management always seems to regard with more respect than themselves, their own employed professionals. Having been on both sides of that business perhaps I’m in a particularly good place to offer some thoughts.

The pros and cons of each position are fairly obvious.

The In House Expert

Pro:

Has regular     income,

Generally a much     more secure  position, and

Much more     detailed knowledge of the company and its strategies (enabling better     recommendations – in theory)

Con:

Typically not as     highly regarded for professional expertise as the outside consultant,

Often charged     with implementing plans that were designed by non-professionals     (executives), and

Held accountable     for their success or failure, usually the latter.

Outside Consultant

Pro:

Typically gets     to design and recommend the plan they think is best,

Not bogged down     in the details of administration and implementation, and

Variety of     companies and industries to work with keeps things interesting and     challenging.

Con:

Income/benefits     is either extremely variable or insecure; depending on being your own firm     or working for a larger one,

Rarely get to     see things work out with your recommendations, and

Must spend as     much time developing business (selling) as actually doing the work you     presumably love and are best at.

My career went pretty much as follows: in house, consultant, in house, consultant, and finally in house; altogether roughly equal total times in each role. My consulting experience was divided between being a sole practitioner and an employee of a large consulting firm. I suppose I’ve seen the field from just about every vantage point.

Based on my parents’ Great Depression Era experience, I put too much importance on job security. In addition, I was too fearful about business development or selling. Everyone has to examine their own feelings about these elements and determine if they are willing to push through and learn how to do or accept something different or if they really aren’t suited to those aspects of work. My personal opinion is that most in house professionals would do well as consultants, in larger firms where someone else is taking the lead on the business development, i.e. selling.

There are frustrations in either role, the key to a happy and satisfying career is finding the role that minimizes the frustrations that are most annoying and then learning not to focus on them. A lot of people (me included) have the habit of looking at life and seeing what is missing from their “perfect” view of what they would like, it’s the “squeaky wheel” view. If it is something that can be “fixed”, fine, do it and move on. But when the things that are missing can’t be had (because they are not in your control) then focusing on them only increases the sense of frustration and dissatisfaction.

There are things not specifically covered in the pros and cons above. My first consulting job was with a large firm as their employee. The partner I was assigned to made a statement whose accuracy and importance was much greater than I realized at the time. “There is a fine line between what we do and prostitution.” We were primarily working in executive compensation so the applicability of the statement should be obvious.

But it applied in a broader sense. I discovered that even in matters of base pay for the rank and file, we often had to navigate between the preconceived notions of the client and good professional practice. In order to ensure continued business from the client there was always the pressure to give them whatever they thought they wanted. Diplomatically “selling” the recommendations we made is a skill that is needed for both the in house and outside consultant roles. Naively, I originally thought the basic facts and logic would be enough to carry the day.

The topic of executive compensation deserves its own article; but let’s just say being hired by and working for the executive whose compensation plan you will be designing and recommending to the Board of Directors is, at the very least, a conflict of interest with the goal of objective and professional counsel.

Let me say that I do admire and respect those entrepreneurs who see an unmet need in the market and fill it and make a success of their business. My admiration can sometimes border on reverence. At the same time, many of these individuals had unrealistic ideas about themselves and their employees. Too many thought of themselves heroically and that others should consider themselves privileged to be allowed to help them achieve their lofty objectives.

I remember the businessman who wanted to double his profits. He wanted an incentive plan to motivate his people to do more to upsell, retain and get new customers (by having current customers refer others). However, his idea of a sufficient reward for doing this was a maximum potential bonus of 5% a year over the next 5 years. What this means in practice is that each year the maximum bonus for helping double the business (and the owner’s profit) is the equivalent of working 1⅓ hours of overtime each week. Over the course of five years the maximum bonus for helping double the owner’s business (in virtual perpetuity) amounts to about 25% of one year’s base pay. True, those requirements might reasonably be part of the job currently. But if that isn’t having the desired results, how sure are we that having the staff ramp it up, add more enthusiasm is going to change things? Is the service really up to the best possible? In short, how much extra effort are people going to put out to double the boss’ pay for that amount of reward?

So I guess what I’m saying is that the first “pro” under consulting, (gets to design and recommend the plan they think is best) really depends on how good you feel you are at selling your idea to the client and/or how willing you are to risk them not liking it simply because it contradicts their life long biases.

The third “pro” under in house expert (more familiarity with the company etc.) only matters if your opinions and recommendations are being heard or considered by executive management.

So the basic choice is, in house for regular earnings and a modicum of job security, with limited opportunities for job satisfaction; consulting for variety and the excitement of pressure.

Sometimes you can hit the winning combination. I had a period as an in house expert where I actually was listened to and made a difference with my recommendations. I even had a good period as a consultant where the business development was handled by a very good sales person who brought me in to let the prospect see that I had good ideas and could work well with them.

Of course there were situations that were all of the bad elements together, but there isn’t much to say about those, except that if you are in one, get out as soon as you realize it. Don’t let fear of financial insecurity hold you back. Those situations don’t change from the inside as often as folks like to believe (you have a better chance of winning the lottery). And if you still think your loyalty to the company will count for something, I’m sorry, but wake up – this isn’t the 1950’s.

[prettyyoungtragedy]

Written in the Stars (2)

Characters: Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: You’re the type of woman who is headstrong and fiercely independent. Heiress to a fortune and one of the most brilliant minds of the 21st century. Until you’re forced into witness protection. Your “Protection” turns out to be 220 pounds of dreamy, sassy, delightful Bucky Barnes. Whatever could go wrong?

Warnings: Swearing, if that's a warning these days. 

A/N: Oh man, all the love for chapter one made me scream! I hope you like part 2, here’s Bucky being bossy, an annoyed reader and a little sassy humor for everyone! if ya wanna be kind and throw me a pretty comment and a reblog? I’ll love you forever.

This was generously Beta’d by my beta @suz-123 without whom I will never have any good ideas! thank you buddy!

Tags: Hit me up in my ASK box!

Links are being an asshole so you can find other chapters of this fic in my WIP masterlist in my bio!

“Think you can handle this?” Sam asked as he handed Bucky one of his handguns, watching his friend strap on his bulletproof vest. Bucky didn’t need it but it was better to be safe than sorry in this case, especially when Hydra was involved they probably had ways of bringing the Winter Soldier down.

“Yes, what do I look like? An amateur?” Bucky responded rolling his eyes at Sam’s incredulous question, taking the gun from his hand and holstering it to his hip.

“You know that’s not what I mean.” Sam shoved Bucky’s shoulder slightly.

“I know, I’ll fine. It’ll be fine,” He gives Sam a reassuring smile. The pair were an odd couple but had become the support the other needed in hard times. It was weird sharing this unbreakable bond of friendship because of Steve, but it was a comfort to both of them knowing each had the others back. When they weren’t bickering incessantly with each other Sam and Bucky were a formidable force.

“What time is the meeting set for?” Sam gives Bucky the black box with the comms in them and waited as he placed it in his ear.

“Steve and I are meeting at the new apartment in an hour, I have to escort her there.”

“And she’s fine with moving apartments?”

“What do you think?” Bucky’s tone dripping with sarcasm,

Sam laughed and placed a hand on his friend's shoulder, gripping it lightly. “That woman is going to eat you alive buddy,”

“Nah, women love me, it’ll be a walk in the park.”

Sam nods, “Well, good luck out there, man. This might not be President Ellis but she sure as shit is more important to us, right now.”

“Don’t need luck,” Bucky grinned at him as the two of them walked out of the weapons vault, he strutted a few feet in front of Sam before turning around to face him, “I am the fucking Winter Soldier.” He spreads his arms cockily as if he were showing off his grandeur.

This response makes Sam chortle with laughter, and shake his head at Bucky’s arrogance. He wasn’t wrong though, Bucky Barnes was part The Winter Soldier and part Avenger, he was a fucking machine.

~~~

It was barely seven in the morning when you hear the door to the safe house open, the rather shitty safe house that Nick Fury and his squad of morons had forced you to live in the past four days.

The soft creak of the wooden floors as their footfalls hit the hardwood. The alarm bells in your head going off and, immediately, you shot up out of the double bed and to your feet, ready to fight whoever was walking towards the bedroom door, not that you were any kind of fighter but if worst comes to worst, you’d be ready to get scrappy about it.

To say you were a little on edge because of the briefing yesterday wouldn’t be a lie. You were putting on this sarcastic brave face, but in fact, you had spent the entire night tossing and turning too afraid that if you close your eyes you wouldn't wake up the next morning.

So, when the bedroom door was flung open, it was only natural in your tired, sleep deprived state that you let out a scream of terror, only to come face to face with James Buchanan Barnes.

“Well good morning to you, too.” He said amusement in his eyes as he took in your cowering figure which was now in a pathetic defensive stance.

“What the fucking fuck?!” You exclaimed at him, straightening up, trying to pick up the modicum of dignity you had left after that scream.

“I was testing you.” He shrugged.

“What the fuck kind of test was that?!”

“To see how quick your reflexes are in a panicked situation.”

You stared open mouthed at him for a moment, a million insults hurling through your mind which you wanted to shout at him, but, instead, you snap your mouth shut and glower at him. Folding your arms over your chest, you realized you were barely clad in a t-shirt and scanty shorts that had been given to you by some shield task force member, as you hadn’t been allowed to your apartment yet to get any of your clothes.

“Get dressed, we’re moving you to a secure location today.” He ordered completely ignoring the fact that you were giving him a death stare.

“Wait, what, when do I get to go home?” You rebutted, but Bucky doesn’t listen to you. He whirled around and marched out the bedroom shutting the door in your face. Once again, you are left stunned at just how rude this asshole was, you stared at the door open-mouthed and blinked rapidly, never in your life had you ever been ordered around and it was infuriating you.

You took a slow deep breath and clenched your fists at your side,

“Deep breaths,” You muttered to yourself, “You can’t kill him, he’s the reason you’re going to live through this shit show.”

One. Two. Three.

You exhaled deeply and opened your eyes, “You can kill him after.”

This thought seemed to make you gleeful, and suddenly you had an idea. If the Winter Soldier was going to be your bodyguard and make your life hard, you were going pull the exact same shit with him. Then and there you decided to be the most painful version of yourself just to see how far you could push your limits with him before he quit.

Grinning to yourself at your plan you made your way to the bathroom to get dressed.

~~~

Twenty minutes later, you stood in front of your protection detail. The Winter Soldier stands a few feet closer to you than the rest of them, he hands you a little ID with your picture printed on it, a watch that has a small sleek black screen on it and what looked like a phone.

“ID to get you in and out of the tower without hassle,” He pointed to it, “The watch is programmed with a tracking device and is connected to Stark servers as well as FRIDAY the Avengers personal AI, there’s a heart monitor, for proof of life and should your heartbeat drop or become erratic in any way it will alert your protection detail. Anything you need, touch your finger to the screen and it will assist you, like a personal assistant. Should I not be with you, there is a panic button and it will alert us of your danger.”

“Proof of life, like I’m a hostage. How fun.” You retorted. You waited as he slid the watch onto your wrist, and the screen flashed to life.

“Good morning, Sergeant Barnes.” A female voice with an Irish lilt rang through the receiver of the watch startling you, slightly.

“Hi FRIDAY, configure the watch. It is on the subject, lock in the location and secure Astro mode.”

“Astro mode?” You piped up looking at Bucky.

“Highest security level.” He responded not looking at you, his gaze is fixed on the watch as he waited for it to configure.

“Configuration complete.” FRIDAY states and Bucky nodded.

Then he pointed to the sleek black phone like object in your hand, “Stark tech, no incoming call or text can get through without going through the security checks at the Avengers tower. All your contacts have been programmed in there and no one can trace the IP or caller ID on your phone. The only people with this number is myself, Steve Rogers and Director Fury, for safety reasons, of course, no one but me will call you.”

“Wait, why do I have to give up my phone? That is stupid.” You began to protest but the look Bucky gives you shuts you up instantly. Clearly, he isn’t in the mood for your shit, well, at least not yet.

He ignores your little outburst and then almost robotically turned away from you towards the three men that stood behind him, patiently waiting for him to finish giving you instructions.

“These three are handpicked by me for this assignment, each one of them has gone through stringent tests and background searches before being assigned to protect you. Should I not be around, the highest ranking officer will step in and take over protection detail.”

“Why wouldn’t you be around, I thought you were supposed to hover like an annoying shadow?” You interjected, sarcastically.

Bucky gives you a deadpan look and ignores your comment again, “For safety reasons, they will only be known to you by their code names.” He pointed to the blonde on the far right, he looked like he deadlifted buildings, “Agent 27; codename Achilles,”

Then pointed to the brunette with blue eyes and a grim face, “Agent 12; code name Arcas,”

Lastly, he pointed to the tallest of them all, broad-shouldered with a hard face, he looked like he never smiled. “Agent 8; codename Dionysus.”

“What’s with the Greek codenames?” You asked, genuinely curious why all their codenames were that of Greek mythology.

Before Bucky could answer you, however, his phone rang and he quickly answered it. A curt conversation over the line indicated to you that whoever was on the other end was telling him to hurry up because he muttered something along the lines of ‘Have some fucking patience’, before cutting the call.

“Let’s move.” He nodded curtly to the rest of the agents, they immediately dispersed and headed for the exit. You waited a moment before Bucky turned towards you, his expression is stoic and hard, and you sense an immediate shift in his attitude.

It was time to get to work.

“I have three golden rules, three rules for you to follow and we will be fine in every situation.” Bucky’s voice almost steely and robotic as he spoke, “Number one, I move, you move, doesn’t matter when or where, you listen to every instruction I give you, no arguments. You stay behind me at all times, there isn’t a moment when you’re ahead of me, unless, I specifically instruct you to be so. I am your human shield, you got it?”

“Oh good, a human shield. This should be fun.” Your snide answer goes unanswered by him as he continued.

“Number two, I am not here to fuck around, I’m not a pretty boy for you to show off to your high society friends, I am not in the field of playing games and entertaining your bullshit. My number one priority is keeping you alive, and if you act like an idiot, you die and I don’t need that on  my resume.”

“You think you’re a pretty boy?” You barked out a laugh

“The prettiest,” He bit back before continuing, again, “Number three. Wherever you are, I am. You do not go anywhere without me. You have to piss? I am standing at the door. You have a check-up at the doctor? I am there. You need to blow your nose? I give you the tissue. Do you understand?”

“I mean this is a little excessive don’t you thi-”

“Do you understand.” He cuts you off in a demanding voice, your defiant eyes meet his and you glared at him.

The instructions seemed simple enough but the fact that he was going to control every aspect of your life was suddenly annoying you. He was right, everything you did he was going to have to be there for it and that didn’t sit well with you.

“I have a life you know, I can’t have you hovering around me when I go on dates and out with friends.”

“Well, in the interest of keeping you alive, you’re going to have to suck it up and deal with me hovering, sweetheart.” Bucky moved closer towards you, his steely eyes piercing into yours and as much as you want to fight his every command at that moment, the sensible side of your brain is telling you to shut up and listen to him, “Besides, you won’t be going on many dates in the coming months, believe me.”

“I mean you can try and stop me from living my life, but good luck with that,” You jeered back at him, folding your arms over your chest in defiance.

A look of shock skittered across his face for a moment before he reigns his emotions in, and that stoic expression settled over his face again. Bucky is about to say something to you but changes his mind and just shakes his head.

“Follow my every instruction when we leave,” He ordered you and you felt your nerves prickle at the demanding tone he used with you, but you remained silent, “I move, you move? Got it.”

“Yes Soldier, I got it. Relax.”

Bucky clenched his jaw at your response but chooses to ignore your sarcasm again, clearly, his resolve was resolute because you would have at least expected some kind of chirp back with all the sass you were giving him.

He turned away from you and began to make his way out of the safehouse with you following closely behind him. It’s a quick trip down the elevator and into the lobby of the building where your usual car was waiting for you. You were a little relieved that not everything had changed, you still had the same driver and the same car.

Small victories. You thought.

For a moment you forgot that you were under supervision and walked a little faster, cutting in front of Bucky in an attempt to get to the car before him. It’s an innocent mistake on your part as you neared the freedom of being in a car and not cooped up in that safe house, but that moment of freedom is suddenly wrenched away as quickly as it arrived.

Bucky hand closes around your arm halting you just seconds before your hand touches the door to the lobby entrance. Whether he intended to or not, the force with which he stopped you from exiting startled you and you gasped in shock.

“What the-” You began to say but he cuts you off.

“Stay behind me, I said I move, you move. How am I supposed to protect you if you’re in front of me?” He snapped at you letting go of your arm.

“God fucking damn it, it’s like two meters to the car!” You exclaimed.

Bucky took a deep breath and steadied his temper. He was about two seconds away from yelling at you in the middle of the lobby, but he knew he couldn't, or Steve would punch the lights out of him for embarrassing the team and being unprofessional, also not with these many witnesses around. He stepped around you and pushed open the door, the cool morning air hitting his skin as it gusted into the lobby.

His eyes scanned the area from the entrance to the car, he takes in every detail he can, the pedestrians walking past, the other guests at the hotel moving around, talking to each other walking in and out, his eyes move like a hawk across the rooftops of the building for any signs of danger then when he was satisfied he stepped aside and gestured for you to start walking again.

You rolled your eyes at him and rather caustically walked out the lobby raising your hands in surrender as you approached the car. A hint of amusement hits him as he watched you walk over to the car and throw him a belligerent look before getting in loudly calling out to him,

“Oh, look, whatever shall I do, I made it to the car by myself.” You rolled your eyes at him so hard, Bucky could have sworn he heard them roll.

He shook his head and followed you, biting back the sudden smile that wanted to appear on his face from that display you had just put on.

Man, you weren’t going to make this easy for him.

~~~

Bucky stood in the massive living room of your penthouse apartment in Manhattan, his eyes moving across the living space with quiet amazement. He had been around technological advances and Stark’s fancy lifestyle long enough to know luxury but this, this place was phenomenal.

The entire space looked like it belongs in a magazine, from the beige tones throughout the room, accented by creams and golds to the marble flooring and pillars that stood at the entrances to it.

There wasn’t a thing out of place, not a speck of dust anywhere. For a home, Bucky found it surprisingly cold, but the problem with it was there was too much open space which was like an invitation for anyone trying to get to you.

There were staff that worked for you, chefs, cleaning staff, a driver, people who picked up your clothes, bought them for you, your personal assistant, too many people and too many eyes for his liking.

He didn’t have time to screen every single person in your life, so he made an executive decision right then. The team would have to move you to a different safe house or keep you at the one you were at. It was just safer that way, and if push came to shove he would have Steve run background on everyone in your life before bringing you back here.

Of course, he knew this wasn’t going to sit well with you and a small part of him felt amused by the fact that you were probably going to throw a shitfit about it.

“Sergeant Barnes?” A voice brings his attention back to the people in front of him and he looked up at the person, it was one of the STRIKE members they’d brought here to fit in a new security system.

“What is it?” He replied,

“We are done setting up the system, would you like us to show her how it works?” The agent asked,

Bucky shook his head and took the tablet from his outstretched hand, “No, I’ll run through that with my team. Thanks.”

The agent gave him a polite nod before he walked away once more. Bucky scrolled through the system they’d installed throughout your apartment, it was one of Stark’s best security systems linked directly to FRIDAY. It was biometric so only the pre-approved list of persons could come and go without him knowing about it, but he still didn’t like this place.

Just then you walked into the living room and looked around for a moment before your eyes met his and you crossed your arms at the sight of him. Bucky smirked,

He annoyed you, good.

“So are they done wreaking havoc around my home?” You asked annoyance thick in your tone,

“Yes they are but don’t get comfortable yet, we’re going back to the safe house.”

“Wait what, why?”

“Because I have decided you won’t be staying here,”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re excused, go pack your shit up.”

Bucky watched as your face turned from shocked to completely enraged, he was full well expecting a tantrum from you and that is exactly what he received. Amusement rippled through him as he watched you defiantly fold your arms over your chest and start yelling obscenities at him.

“Absofuckinglutely not! I refused to stay one more night in that crappy apartment in Brooklyn, I would much rather Hydra kill me then stay one more night in that hell hole.” You exclaimed dramatically, “I was promised protection not uprooting my entire fucking life to go live in Brooklyn for this trial, I will not leave, I refuse. You can go to hell,”

You were breathing heavily from anger when you were finally done yelling at him, all while Bucky just looked at you with a bored expression on his face.

“Are you done?” He asked,

“Not even close,”

“Okay well, then you can continue to yell at me once we’re in the car, let’s go.”

And before you could even say anything further, Bucky gripped your arm firmly but gently and began to haul you towards your bedroom to collect your things.

~~~

It was supposed to be business as usual but it felt like the furthest thing from it. You walked into your lab on Friday morning and were met with the sight of Bucky Barnes leaning against the wall, sunglasses on, one hand in the pocket of his black jeans and the other holding his phone in the other. Dark hair falling into his eyes as he frowned down at his phone.

“Why the fuck are you here?” You sighed walking up to him not bothering to say good morning or any other pleasantries for that matter.

Bucky looked up from his phone, an amused smile on his face, he tucked his dark hair behind his ear on one side and shoved his phone into his pocket.

“Why, good morning sunshine.” He replied smoothly, amusement ripe in his voice.

“Again, why are you here?”

“I feel like you seem to be forgetting my instructions.” Bucky said pulling off his sunglasses and revealing those ridiculously blue eyes, “I said, I move, you move, but somehow this morning I show up to move you and, whaddya know? You’ve already left for the day, care to explain?”

There is clear sarcasm in his tone but also a hint of demand. He’s upset with you but isn’t showing it or trying not to at this point. You didn’t want to be escorted to work, not after the shit show last night when you had to run through the entire layout of your penthouse home with them only to have Bucky tell you that you will no longer be allowed to live there because there were too many entrance points.

Needless to say, you threw a shit fit, and stormed off, but, alas, were followed by the Winter Soldier who wordlessly put you in your car and drove you right back to the safehouse, kicking and screaming.

So this morning, you awoke earlier than usual, got dressed and slipped out of the safehouse, without any of the agents noticing. It actually amazed you how easily you got past them, clearly, they weren’t very good at their jobs.

Your whole life you had the freedom to come and go as you pleased and now that you had to hand over the reins of your life to someone else, it was frustrating you. Your every move was going to be monitored and someone beside you at all times, this wasn't the life you were used to.

“Jesus H. Christ, I just needed to feel normal for two seconds, okay. I can get myself to work safely.” You said irritably rubbing your forehead with your hand.

“No, you can’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“You can’t get yourself to work safely because you don’t know what threats there are out there. I, on the other hand, do and seeing as it’s my job to get you places safely, I would appreciate a modicum of agreement here.”

“So would I.” You retorted stubbornly, “You have me cooped up in that shitty safehouse in Brooklyn, when my gorgeous Manhattan apartment is going to waste, deserted and dying without me in it.”

You watched him sigh and clench his jaw again, becoming frustrated with your defiance. Bucky ran his fingers through his hair and looked down at you, a scowl on his handsome face, now.

“I am really trying to be patient here,” He said exasperatedly, “but you’re not making this easy, can you please just follow my instructions?”

“Fucking fuck, fine. But can I at least move out of that shitty apartment and into my home again? I hate that fucking place.”

Bucky lets out an exhale, the exasperation clear all over his face. “Fine, We will move you to a different location not your place but one better than what you’re at, also I take you to work and get you home every day, end of story.”

You rolled your eyes and brushed past him, walking into your lab. Bucky followed you, you watched as his eyes sweep the entirety of it before they settled back on you.

“I really don’t think you need to be here 24/7,” You sighed, “This whole situation is being made such a big deal of, I can take care of myself, you know.”

“This is not a game.” He replied moving to lean against one of the metal lab tables.

“I didn't say it was but I know what I have gotten myself into and I can handle it!”

“No one is saying you can’t, but, you need to take this seriously-”

“I am taking this seriously! You think I don’t know what’s at stake here?!” You were suddenly shouting at him, “I am uprooting my entire life for this god damn cause, I am going against my family for this cause, I know the seriousness of it all!”

“Then stop acting like a child and listen to me!” He shouts back and you fell silent. You weren't expecting him to yell back at you, and it kind of scared you. Bucky suddenly stood taller and his figure seemed to double in size as if he rose to his full height, and it was dominating.

“Get out, I need to work.” You muttered turning away from him so he wouldn’t see the sudden tears in your eyes. It was frustration and fear building up inside you and he wasn’t helping.

Bucky took a deep breath and reigned his anger in, he shouldn’t have yelled at you, but he doesn’t care right now. All he knows is he needs to keep you safe and if you are a belligerent asshole the entire time, it’s going to end up costing someone their life and he’d rather it was not you.  

“I will be outside,” Bucky said in a steely voice before he turned sharply and marched out of your lab once more, leaving you alone with the silence, your thoughts and the panic now rising in your chest.

~~~

The lab felt like a safe little bubble as you lost yourself in your work. Hours ticked by before you noticed the ache in your stomach reminding you it was time to eat something. You glanced up at the clock and realized it was almost one in the afternoon, you also realized that you had left Bucky to wait outside for you not bothering to check up on him.

Why the fuck do you care? You had no idea but you felt a little guilty leaving the giant brick shithouse of a human to wait outside for you.

Grumbling under your breath about how stupid it was that you needed him to hover once again, you pulled off your lab coat and tossed it onto the table before walking out of your lab.

You half expected Bucky to be waiting for you right outside the door but to your surprise, he was not. A small part of you was disappointed that he wasn’t but you shoved that aside and quickly made your way toward the elevator, maybe he was going to let up on this ridiculous notion that he had to accompany you everywhere and you could have a peaceful lunch.

Hitting the elevator button repeatedly, you waited watching the orange light flash from floor to floor as it came up to you.

“Just so you know, repeatedly hitting the button doesn’t make the elevator go any faster.” A voice suddenly said beside you, it was close to your ear.

You whirled around, a strangled scream almost erupting from your throat as you slapped your hand over your mouth to avoid screaming. You were met with Bucky’s amused blue eyes and a smirk on his face.

“Motherfucker!”

“No, that would require me to sleep with someone's mother, of which I have not done so, yet. I think,”

“Don’t fucking sneak up on me!”

“I did not, you don’t have situational awareness.” He shrugged.

“I so do.”

“Oh, really? Tell me one thing you noticed that is out of place on this floor.”

You glared at him for a moment, why was he always challenging you, then your gaze swept across the length of the area. It was the reception area of this floor, bright green plants, glass walls, metal doors and signs leading to every lab. The smell of rubbing alcohol and sterilizing agents mixed in the air, with a hint of cherries from the floor cleaner.

There are a few people about, the security guard, Wallace, who as always there, the receptionist, Jody, who was on the phone, a few people sat in the reception area. Either waiting for someone or something, you notice nothing out of the ordinary.

“There’s nothing out of place…” You say it a little hesitant because you already know he's placed something that sets him on edge.

“Look again,” He orders and you follow his command eyes moving across the room again, “See the security? He’s not wearing his badge, why? That should be a red flag already if you didn’t know him. He could be anyone.”

“I know Wallace, he’s worked here for years.” You retorted.

“Beside the point. Now, look at the receptionist, she's not focused on her surroundings, isn't watching who's coming and going, how will she know who any of her guests are? The guy in the green jacket on the couch,” Bucky gestured towards him and you looked in that direction,”He’s carrying a firearm, but I can see his police badge from here which means he's law enforcement, but why is he here?”

“Cops come here all the time for forensics, when they need help or are short staffed.”

“Right, but have you seen him before?”

You looked at the man and shook your head slowly, “No.”

“And see the lady over by the water cooler, look at her nervousness, she’s not supposed to be here and her body language tells me that, immediately.”

You hadn’t picked up any of the things Bucky had just pointed out to you, and it amazed you just how keen his attention to detail was.

“Last but not least,” Bucky stepped a little closer to you just as the elevator dined on the landing, “You walked out of your lab, looked around the room, and never saw me when I was sitting right here.” He motioned towards one of the chairs near the elevator and you frowned.

How the hell had you not seen him, that was not possible.

“But I-” You began to say and he shakes his head.

“Situational awareness.” Was all he said before he gripped your by the elbow and guided you onto the elevator, “Where to?”

“Lobby, we’re getting lunch.”

A curt nod and he pushed the button, his hand remaining on your arm the entire ride down to the lobby and even as he helped you into the car.

~~~

“There’s a bagel stand right there!” Bucky exclaimed, pushing open the lobby door the two of you walk out onto the steps of the massive office building, the air outside is cool and crisp, a nice change to the spring heat for once.

“Well, I don’t eat cheap bagels from a stand, I eat croissants from Butter.” You snorted shaking your head at him,

“What the fuck is Butter?”

“It’s my lunch restaurant, and you’re taking me there.”

“No, I am not.”

“Yes, you are.”

You crossed your arms defiantly and stood your ground in front of him. He’d already took your home from you and your freedom, he wasn’t going to take your lunch place from you now, too.

“Fucking hell,” Bucky muttered caving to your defiance.

~~~

“So, you got rid of my car.” You noted as the two of you walked into the restaurant you wanted to eat lunch at. Bucky tried to protest bringing you here, but you simply stated that if you didn't get lunch from this place you would have a full-scale meltdown in public and he would have to deal with it. To which he begrudgingly agreed even though he seemed tense the entire way there.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because the replacement is an armored car that can withstand the rounds of AR-15’s.”

You fell silent at that response, you weren’t expecting it or that he was prioritizing your safety at such a high level. As you walked towards the table near the window the usual spot you sat at Bucky stopped you. You frowned up at him and waited as he looked around the room, before steering you in a different direction.

“What are you doing? I want to sit there.” You protested.

“No, you can’t sit here.” He shook his head.

“James I want to sit there, I always sit there, it’s my table.”

“No. Look around, for fucks sake.”

You paused your argument for a moment and looked around with a frown, you clearly didn’t see what he saw.

“I don’t see anything.” You snapped.

“The exits are blocked from that area of the room, they are obstructed by the pillars. The window opens up the vulnerability of a sniper, and the area is raised, hazardous for quick escapes.”

Everything he had just pointed out was something you wouldn’t have even thought of, it made a little more sense why he was assigned to you, the man was like a robot when it came to safety.

“Situational awareness.” You said softly, realizing he was right.

“Situational awareness.” Bucky nodded, a pleased glint in his eyes when he sees you finally understand what he is trying to say.

“Alright, where are we sitting?” You asked.

Bucky gestured to a table nearby and walked you over, his hand on your back as he did so. The waitress comes over and hands you a menu she flashes Bucky a wide smile which he returns. Obviously, she blushes three shades of red and scurried off once more, you rolled your eyes at this. To be fair, he was really pretty.

Bucky took up a stance near the table not joining you, he crossed his arms over his massive chest, that broody look settling over his face once more as his eyes moved across the restaurant. You frowned at him,

“What are you doing?”

“What do you mean?”

“Sit down, you idiot.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“I don't care, I don’t want to attract attention by having your 220-pound ass hovering around me.”

“It’s for safety.”

“Well, you look really stupid and people are starting to stare, so sit the fuck down.”

Bucky chuckled, an actual chuckle and this amazed you. Had you really gotten the grumpy Winter Soldier to chuckle?

He doesn't say anything, instead, he walked over, kicked back the chair and dropped down into it, beside you. Resting his hulking forearms on the table, he looks at you, pointedly.

“Better?”

“Much.” You replied unable to keep the amused smile off your face.

He shook his head and said nothing. Instead, he watches you with a playful glint in his eyes. He doesn’t know how, or why, but he finds himself having a glimmer of interest in you. Maybe he even liked you a little, it was all that defiance and sass, it just reminded him of small Stevie.

Boy, was he in trouble with this one.

[magnificentbouquets]

A Different Way to Say Goodbye

Yesterday, I attended my first COVID 19 funeral. I say first because I feel certain that I will go to more. Not only because of my work as a florist, but also because of the prevalence of this disease.

 The funeral started at 1.30pm at a large North London crematorium. Sadly, the deceased was the mother of one of my school friends. I was invited to attend remotely and had received a link to connect approximately 5 minutes before the ceremony began. The login took me to a “holding” waterfall scene and then in due time the video was switched on to the inside of the crematorium. I’m assuming it was the smallest chapel, to be any other would have been cruel given the circumstances.

 Through my work with flowers I am used to discreetly, moving in and out of crematoriums. I deliver tributes, set up pedestals and any other special requests from the bereaved, so the empty chapel did not seem that unfamiliar. I’m used to slipping away un-noticed by the gathering mourners, sensing their sadness and hoping that the tributes that I have created will bring them a modicum of comfort.

 After a couple of moments, a funeral director appeared followed by my friend’s niece, who set up a laptop and then took a seat at the front of the chapel, closest to the lectern. A few minutes later, three ladies appeared, one sat next to the young niece and two took seats on the other side of the chapel three rows apart. It was in this moment the everything started to feel unfamiliar.

 Many ethnic communities observe strict rituals at the time of death. As a second generation British Asian, I’m definitely not an expert in those rituals. But one thing I know for sure is that at a time of mourning Asians put aside any differences and gather to support the bereaved and pay their last respects. In normal circumstances it wouldn’t be unusual to see 200+ mourners at the cremation or burial of a great grandmother. Perhaps naively, I hadn’t prepared myself to see something very different. Even though I knew that the UK government guidelines had restricted numbers attending funerals the few people there shocked me.

 The coffin was adorned with a tribute which was not clearly visible on the video. It was carried in by my friend’s three brothers and the funeral director. My friend had moved to Barcelona many years ago and was settled there with his young family. In normal circumstances, he would often fly into London to visit family and friends, occasionally on a weekly basis. I cannot begin to imagine how painful it was for him his family to be unable to physically be there with even his closest family at such a sad time. As he later said, thank goodness for technology, which had allowed him to attend the daily prayers for his dear mum by video.

The coffin was placed on the chapel platform, with a garlanded photograph. The brothers bowed before taking their places by their respective partners, maintaining social distances that were extremely hard to observe. I remember those brothers clowning around in their youth, seeing them sombre was heart wrenching. The pain of not being close was palpable although they all kept their dignity, doing their mother proud. The chapel looked cavernous with the absence of mourners.

 A Hindu priest conducted the service by video. Prayers were offered, followed by a reading from the Bhagvad Gita (a Hindu holy book). The appropriateness of the passage that describes the journey and indestructible nature of the soul, felt a comfort given the nature of her passing. Then one of the brothers gave a moving speech, detailing what a loving person his mother had been, how close she was to their disabled sister, how much she loved her children and grandchildren and what pleasure she took from seeing them all thrive.

As her sons, grew up she referred to them as “bhai” meaning brother, always praying for good health and longevity for each of them as they parted. Listening to his soft Zimbabwean accent as he described their lovely mum had me in tears. The final Prayers were then offered with the peace mantra. The brothers were asked to step forward to press the button that would send the coffin to its final destination, arms outstretched to maintain social distancing.

 To watch by video link, unable to offer condolences or the gentle pat of a hand is just too hard. For the scant mourners present not to know who is there with them felt very wrong. So much of a florist’s work involves bringing comfort at sad times with flowers. And it is not just the flowers. Florists speak with the bereaved, giving them a chance to talk about their loved one, not just about their passing, but of the person that they were, their likes, their dislikes, their career, their humour and in a small way bring comfort with those final tributes. It is heart-breaking to observe grieving people being unable to comfort each other. And to be unable to offer comfort yourself.

 This is the text conversation I had with my friend, as soon as I could compose myself after the ceremony. I admit I was weepy for the rest of the day.

Me-”Oh Sanj, that was so desperately sad, so sorry for your loss and for the sadness of your family.”

Sanj-”Thanks Jo, it’s wonderful that you were able to join  🙏  ❤️”

Me(The next day)-”Good morning Sanj, how are you feeling? Thank you for asking me to attend your mum’s passing by video link. I was very moved and saddened by the ceremony. I’m very familiar with funerals because of my work with flowers, but this is the first time I have attended by video link. I did not appreciate how hard it would be not to be able to offer words of comfort or the gentle pat of a hand. I cannot imagine how hard it must have been for you and your family to be in Spain, so near yet so far away.”

Sanj-”It is very strange to know mum has passed away but not be able to be there with her, Rashi (my sister) and the rest of the family.

Mum passed because of Covid-1919 so her coffin was sealed shut. Her body could not come home for the Hindu ceremony, but the priest and community performed it using a photo of hers.

The whole thing has been weird.

Thank God for Zoom, we have had online prayers every day with the family and the priest has been able to attend/ carry out the ceremony via Zoom video link. These are things that would have been important for mum.

In any case she has had a lovely send off.

For us here, it will take a while to sink in.

It is a curious observation that how amazingly adaptable we all are, we have a new norm and even bereavement can be celebrated in a new way.

For me it highlights that we can fix everything apart from the most important basics, i.e. seeing friends and family face to face and being able to comfort each other with a smile or a tear or a hug.”

Me-” Yes, hold your dear ones close while you can. Tomorrow isn’t promised.”

From Sanj’s sister in law-”With a very heavy heart I write this. To all the people out there that think this is just a virus, please think again. Speaking from personal experience this so called virus has taken the life of someone very dear to us. She passed away today from Covid -19 on Good Friday.

my family is going through the most unimaginable pain, we are shattered beyond belief. The reality of this virus is unfolding before our very eyes.

Please, please adhere to government guidelines,

We could not go to the hospital or sit by her bed and hold her hand. 

We were not able to phone the ward to check on her regularly (the staff are too busy). She was completely alone, while we sat waiting to hear whether she made it through or not.

This is our reality. Celebrating her life but feeling helpless as we were unable to do anything for her during her last dying hours.

Please stay at home and only go out if absolutely necessary. Social distancing is imperative right now for your family and mine.

I am not writing this for likes or comments, just for people to be aware and share this message so lives can be saved...”

[iamanartichoke]

honest question, why are people now saying Loki NEVER faked his death? Tom Hiddleston confirmed that Loki canonically did fake his TDW death (I guess it was the best Loki could do in that situation, he didn't want to go back to jail) during the pre-IW cast interview, it's on youtube... he also mentioned that Loki is redeemed anyways now because he saved his brother's life in IW

I’m so glad Tom did that whole Pinter event and blessed us with these glorious gifs, because this 

was my EXACT reaction upon receiving this ask, lmao. 

The question of whether or not Loki faked his death is such consistent wank in this fandom and I do understand because the canon narrative doesn’t make it explicitly clear when it should have. That’s a failing on the part of Ragnarok, largely, because when Thor says, “You faked your own death,” Loki doesn’t argue or explain. He couldn’t have argued, really, because Thor had him backed into a corner - Thor was furious and unlikely to believe Loki even if he denied it, and Loki at that point looked 500% done with Thor’s sanctimonious tongue-lashing anyway, so it wasn’t really the opportune moment to get the whole story. The problem is that Ragnarok didn’t take advantage of what was an opportune moment (the elevator scene, if nothing else) to have Loki say, hey, you know, actually … 

But I digress. 

“Fake” Death #1: Thor 1. 

I know you talked about The Dark World, but I do feel like I should mention Loki’s “death” at the end of Thor 1 because that tends to get lumped in with Loki’s supposedly fake deaths and establishes this idea of a precedent where Loki just tries to get out of sticky situations by faking his death. People use that as evidence that Loki intended to fake his death in TDW because “he’s done it before.” But he hasn’t. Loki let go of Gungnir with the intention of killing himself. How he survived the fall into space, we don’t know because no one has ever told us, but everything leading up to that moment (Loki’s actions, his pain, his sense of betrayal, his devastation at Odin’s rejection, the look on his face) culminates in him letting go with the intention of falling to his death. That he survived is irrelevant when it comes to the question of “faking” his death - you don’t ask someone who’s sitting in the hospital after slitting their wrists why they faked their death, you know? It amounts to pretty much the same thing. 

“Fake” Death #2: The Dark World. 

Tom Hiddleston’s statement is tricky because you’re right, he does say that Loki faked his death. And I’ll admit, I was totally about to be like, yo, that’s not what he said … but he did say it. However, it’s not as straightforward as “yeah, Loki totally faked it, haha, what a trickster.” It’s more layered than that because what he said is more along the lines of Loki’s death was real but somehow Loki survived it and that’s the trick no one saw coming. 

Here is a link to the Empire interview where he talks about it, dated April 30. (16:40 specifically, you’re welcome.) He says, “Loki’s death on Svartalfheim was written as a [real] death and Chris and I played that scene for real. That was meant to be [his redemption because he] saved his brother [and] Jane Foster and in the process sacrificed himself.” In other words, when they filmed his death scene, Tom’s performance was 100% genuinely given with the understanding that Loki was supposed to die there, that’s it, game over. 

He goes on to say, “in test screenings, the audience didn’t accept it … it was a very strange and almost unanimous resistance to it … so they [ret-conned it to be]�� another shape-shifting, mercurial trick on Loki’s part and he’d actually pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes, including Thor. It’s such a great twist, and I didn’t even know it was a twist.”

So what happened here is that they intended Loki’s death to be real, his death scene was real, and it was only later when they realized that the audience wasn’t willing to let go of Loki that they rewrote it so that Loki survived. Hence, Loki faked his death. 

Okay, fair. 

Now, this is all fine and good, except for the fact that this doesn’t match up with the canon narrative. Loki’s illusions aren’t solid and have never been solid. In Thor 1, he uses doubles on Jotunheim and later on the bridge during his fight with Thor, which disappear as soon as they’re touched. In Avengers, Thor hurtles right through an illusion into the cage on the helicarrier, which dissolves on the contact. (The illusion, not the cage.) In The Dark World, Frigga’s illusion disappears when Loki goes to touch her  (after his hands go right through hers). Finally, in Ragnarok, it becomes a big plot point that Thor keeps “testing” whether Loki is actually there or not by throwing solid objects through his illusions. 

Loki’s illusions not being solid and disappearing upon contact has been consistently established from the very beginning of the Thor franchise. 

Here is Loki’s death scene from The Dark World. Starting at 2:09, we see a very real blade impaling Kurse at Loki’s hand. Kurse turns around and then impales Loki on the same blade. Loki’s body doesn’t shift, shimmer, or otherwise do anything to imply that it was an illusion or a double. Nor does he disappear. That blade really goes right through him (twice, if you count when Kurse throws him back off of it again - which, ouch), and Loki supposedly succumbs to his wounds. 

If this was an illusion, then established canon would have dictated that the illusion would have disappeared right about then. BUt it doesn’t. So the audience is left to assume that this is the real Loki and this was a real injury. The writers/directors retconned the death based on audience feedback, but they only retconned it by showing Loki on the throne in the end. They didn’t rewrite the actual death scene, they didn’t make it obvious that it wasn’t Loki getting stabbed or that Loki was shape-shifting in some way, they didn’t change a single thing about this scene, which was written and acted as a real death scene. If they wanted Loki’s death blow to have been faked somehow, they had every opportunity to make that clear. 

So because they didn’t do that, the audience is left with the implication that Loki truly was injured, severely injured, but didn’t die. And when he didn’t die and Thor just left his body there, he took advantage of the situation. That’s the twist. Not the death blow itself, but what happened afterward. 

Plotting to fake one’s own death is not the same thing as taking advantage of a fatal blow turning out to not be fatal. And the trickery comes in because Loki didn’t make any effort to tell Thor he survived, because he took Odin’s place, because he let everyone keep on thinking he was dead when he wasn’t. So, what Loki really faked was the “idea” of his death. But the injury, the sacrifice, the intent to die - that was all real. 

One thing to support that the death was real but the trick was taking advantage of it is the Thor Ragnarok novelization, which to my understanding is much closer to the original TR script (before all the improvising and rewriting). When Thor discovers Loki’s alive, he says something like, “Only you would make a mockery of your own sacrifice,” which implies that Thor’s interpretation of the situation isn’t so much “you faked your death” as “you sacrificed your life for me and did a good thing and turned around and undermined it, smh Loki.” Which - you see how that’s different, right? 

This is probably a much longer explanation than you asked for, but I think the question warrants it. Loki’s TDW death is one of those wanks that keeps on giving, because the source material is so unclear on which interpretation is correct. 

I think the real issue about it isn’t so much the murky explanation on whether or not Loki faked his TDW death, though - it’s more that the people who say “omg Loki faked it!” are saying that to undermine Loki’s character, Loki’s redemption, and Loki’s sacrifice because they are determined to see him as nothing more than a two-dimensional villain. So the Loki stans shout back that, no, Loki didn’t fake his death, he just let Thor believe he was dead, which isn’t the same thing. It’s an effort to take back Loki’s integrity and complexity as a character - it’s not so much ignoring statements like Tom’s as it is not taking those statements at face-value. Did Tom say Loki faked his death? Yes, he did. Did he mean that Loki intended to do that all along bc he’s just a simple trickster villain trying to get one over on Thor? No, not even a little bit. 

I … hope all that made sense. Or some modicum of sense. Merp. Anyway, thank you for the ask! 

[sbboh]

Yellow Fever

After predicting a mediocre 9th place for Norwich last season, I didn’t actually make it to Carrow Road until Boxing Day. By this point the Canaries were flirting with automatic promotion and hadn’t lost a league game in over two months.

Not long after the hour mark, City found themselves 3-0 down to a relatively unimpressive Nottingham Forest side. But even at that moment, Christmas wasn’t ruined. Norwich were creating chances like there was no tomorrow. Incredibly Norwich made it back to 3-3, with two injury time goals from Onel Hernandez, the player I suggested it was worth keeping an eye on last season. If you haven't seen Jeff Stelling’s reaction to the third Norwich goal, it is well worth looking up.

Norwich lost their next game three days later to Frank Lampard’s Derby County but hardly looked back from that point onwards. A defeat to Preston in February was the only blemish in an incredible end to the 2018/2019 which saw the Norfolk side finish as champions on 94 points.

As they head to Anfield on Friday, it’ll be almost six months since Norwich last lost a competitive game, so in a sense there no reason for Daniel Farke’s team to approach the match with anything other than confidence. Not necessarily a confidence that they can win the game, but that they can utilise their brand of football, lovingly referred to as ‘Farkeball’ to take on Jurgen Klopp’s Liverpool.

The first thing anyone looks for as we enter into August is the summer signings. With Harry Maguire heading to Manchester United for an amount in excess of £80 million, it is worth noting the only fee Norwich have out laid is not even 1% of that. Sam Byram, a £750,000 signing from West Ham, is likely to be a back up right back for the immensely promising Max Aarons.

The other business has involved free transfers and loans.  Swiss striker Josip Drmic, signed on a free from Monchengladbach will likely play second fiddle to last season’s top scorer Teemu Pukki. At the age of 30, Drmic will be looking for redemption after a few seasons of unfortunate injuries. His pre-season has been interesting, scoring a perfect hat-trick against Luton on a Saturday before releasing his own music video on the Sunday. Even if he struggles to find the net this season, he can look back fondly on the two days that were even more productive than Craig David’s seven.

Signed on loan from Schalke, German stopper Ralf Fahrmann provides much needed competition for Tim Krul in goal. Despite being a free transfer, a  leader and a Championship winning goalkeeper, the Dutchman came in for a lot of stick last season. He is no doubt a good keeper and an asset to the dressing room, but Fahrmann will fancy his chances of grabbing the number 1 shirt. I think Krul will get the nod at Anfield, but Fahrmann will be number 1 by Christmas.

The first signing Norwich made this season, Patrick Roberts, has arguably the highest ceiling of all the new arrivals. He’s a left footer, happy to play on the right wing, who hasn’t yet had his chance in the top flight, despite signing for Manchester City four years ago. After limited success at Celtic and Girona, Norwich seems a sensible choice. He should get given a chance by a manager who has pedigree for bringing through young players, notably Roberts’ ex team-mate Angus Gunn. Whether this proves to be his breakthrough season, only time will tell.

If Norwich get off to a poor start then inevitably sports journalists across the land will point to the lack of spending as the obvious shortcoming. But Norwich have been clear from the start that they don’t have the financial muscle to splash the cash. And more pertinently, the feeling around the club is a lot of the players can make the step up to the Premier League without too much fuss. Many of last season’s key players have signed new contracts over the summer. Farke and the indispensable sporting director Stuart Webber have even gone as far buying flowers for the players’ partners to thank them for their support last season. It’s moves like this that could help keep the team together and avoid players being poached by bigger clubs for a little longer.

Aston Villa have spent in excess of £100 million this summer which has gained them the most media attention of the three new promoted sides. The comparisons with Fulham, who spent that much are also lazy. Besides Jack Grealish and John McGinn, Villa had a fairly average Championship squad supplemented by useful loan signings such as Tammy Abraham. Sure Villa might go down, but they’d have been likely to be relegated not long after Christmas without a major overhaul of the existing crop of the players. The same goes for the other promoted side Sheffield United, who appear to have made some shrewd acquisitions such as Callum Robinson and Oli McBurnie to help them make the step up.

Going back to ‘Farkeball’, it does have the potential for success against better opposition. Daniel Farke’s first season at Norwich led to unimpressive 14th place finish in the Championship, which would have almost certainly been lower without James Maddison. But during that season there were very competitive cup games against good Arsenal and Chelsea sides, as well as a decent battle with Bournemouth during the most recent campaign.

Any Norwich fan with a modicum of common sense would be ecstatic with a 17th place finish. But I’d suggest a higher finish is by no means out of the question. The aforementioned will hope Teemu Pukki, the greatest free transfer in Championship history, will hope to turn his 29 league goals last season into double figures of Premier League goals. Bosnian midfielder Mario Vrancic became a greater influence in the second half of last season, and has a world class free-kick in him. But the jewel in the crown is undoubtedly 22 year-old Emi Buendia.

The skilful Argentinian lit up Carrow Road with some sensational performances after joining from Getafe last season. His influence was such that Norwich didn’t win any of the league games he played no part in. It’s not just his ability on the ball, he is superb at winning the ball back from opponents, which makes him deadly in the final third. Norwich fans thought Maddison was going to be as good as it ever got, but Buendia reached levels that have made most forget the Leicester man’ absence. I’d be surprised if any Norwich fan would swap Buendia to have Maddison back right now. Of all the City players, he is the one who could take the league by storm.

For all of my unusual optimism, things could go still go very wrong for Norwich. I’d be no more surprised if Liverpool put 5 past them on Friday as if Daniel Farke’s men snatched a point. The defence, likely to be made up of youngsters Max Aarons, Jamal Lewis and Ben Godfrey has brilliant potential but this is an environment they’ve not faced before. Also longer term, key injuries to the full backs (Lewis and Aarons) as well as Buendia or Pukki could compromise the free flowing style of football Norwich play.

City have got this far by doing it their own way. As they enter the Premier League, the one thing you can guarantee is that they'll continue along that path and see how far it can take them. Unlike previous promotions it feels like Norwich aren't just happy to be there, they really want to show what they can do. I’d expect as the seasons roars into action, the Canaries are much more likely to be making the noise than listening to it.

[easyfoodnetwork]

The Best Road Trip Snacks, According to Eater Editors

From Swedish Fish to charcuterie, these are the snacks that keep Eater staffers sated on long car rides

This summer, the road trip was the only option for many of us to get in some kind of vacation or pay a long-overdue visit to faraway loved ones. And given the unpredictability of food options along routes these days, road trip snacks — always an essential item on the road trip packing list — were more important than ever.

There are certain essential qualities to a road trip snack: You should be able to eat it with one hand and with minimal mess. But beyond that, there are several interpretations of the genre. Road trip snacks may be the foods you find at gas stations and convenience stores, or indulgent treats that make the trip more bearable. Some road trippers select snacks based on their resemblance to an actual balanced meal, or on whether or not they’ll ensure the driver stays alert at the wheel. Eater staffers’ preferred snacks run the gamut. Here’s what fuels them through long car rides these days, as well as in better times.

The sweet

Bit-O-Honey: Bit-O-Honey works as a road trip snack because you can eat an entire bag of them and not feel awful (trust me, I just did this on a six-hour drive from Northern to Southern California). It’s somewhat hilarious that this honey-flavored taffy seems to only be available at truck stops and gas stations. Drivers and passengers alike will crush hours gnawing on these glorious sweets, with microscopic almond pieces giving a modicum of texture. Getting the sticky bits out of your teeth is the rest of the fun. — Matt Kang, Eater LA editor

Swedish Fish: I always have a bag of Swedish Fish on hand for a road trip. They perk you up, they’re chewy and sweet, and they’re the kind of candy I don’t eat every day. It’s also the ONLY time I drink Red Bull. — Lesley Suter, travel editor

Frozen Snickers: I’ve always maintained that a frozen Snickers bar is much, much better than an ice cream Snickers bar, the latter being an inferior product that melts too quickly and the former being something that will last in the car. — Ryan Sutton, Eater NY chief critic/data lead

Sour Patch Kids: My husband and I both agree that Sour Patch Kids are an absolute must on the road. I prefer the watermelon, but he likes the classics. I’m still bitter that the classic recipe seems to have changed, though; I swear they’re not as sour as they used to be. — Rachel Blumenthal, Eater Boston editor

Beaver Nuggets: Road-tripping in Texas means you have to stop by Buc-ee’s and grab a bunch of their packaged snacks. Despite the unfortunate name, the Beaver Nuggets (actually sweet corn puffs) are really great. — Nadia Chaudhry, Eater Austin editor

Trail mix: I buy Archer Farms trail mix from Target — specifically the Monster one with tons of chocolate. Ignore the raisins. — Ellie Krupnick, managing editor

The savory

Snyder’s of Hanover Pretzel Pieces, Honey Mustard & Onion: These carry a Midas touch, covering your fingertips in a golden powder that plays off plain hard pretzels with two sources of tangy-sweet flavor: onion and honey mustard. Grasping for the few thin pieces that hold more powder than pretzel turns every bag into a treasure hunt. — Gabe Hiatt, Eater D.C. editor

Blue Diamond Almonds, Bold Wasabi & Soy: Those thin tubes of wasabi and soy sauce almonds are my road trip snack of choice for a number of reasons. First, they give you all the savory and salt pop of potato chips without the gross “ugh, did I just eat a whole bag of potato chips?” hangover. Second, the pain of wasabi build-up is a great way to stay awake during more monotonous stretches, far less cliched than slapping yourself or other self-abuse you see in the movies. Third, its narrow container is perfect to just tip into your mouth — an act that seems obscene (and obscures your vision) when it’s a chip bag, but makes perfect sense when the bag is long and narrow... and it saves your steering wheel, upholstery, etc. from every road tripper’s nemesis: snack grease. — Eve Batey, Eater SF news editor

Corn Nuts: Corn Nuts are not the sexiest snack, but they fit conveniently in your cupholder and you can just pick at them and shove a handful in your mouth with relative ease. Bonus: If you drop some, they don’t melt all over your car like a bunch of jerks. — Stefania Orrù, coordinating producer

Pizzeria Combos: Combos are so good, but not just any kind: pizza-flavored Combos are the best. They are super salty, bite-sized, and filled with some type of cheesy pizza flavoring. It’s like getting to dip a pretzel in cheese in every bite. I will always eat the whole entire bag on the road regardless of how long the drive is. — Stephen Pelletteri, executive producer

Regional chips: I go for regional takes on barbecue/red hot chips, especially if I am in a new-to-me area where there’s more opportunities to experiment with unfamiliar brands. Pennsylvania gas stations are the best bet for the intersection of multiple brands: One place might get you Snyder’s, Wise, Herr’s, Martin’s, Middleswarth, Utz... No real interest in mesquite/sweet varieties, though. — Missy Frederick, cities director

Ritz Bits, cheese: I only ever buy them at rest stops; I’m scared to invite them into my life outside of that context. — Emma Alpern, senior copy editor

The more holistic meal plans

Carrots and celery: My most recent preferred road trip snack is just straight carrot sticks and celery. I did that on a road trip recently and, magically, I didn’t feel like crap at the end of the trip. Plus, they have that snap and crunch that’s a necessity for a good snack. — Brenna Houck, Eater Detroit editor

Cheese and charcuterie: On the very Los Angeles end of the spectrum, I get mini-cheese and charcuterie boards from Lady & Larder in Mar Vista and then hand feed my boyfriend soft cheeses and cured meats while he drives. — Nicole Adlman, cities manager

Beef jerky, nuts, coffee, and electrolytes: Most of my road trips of late are about the destination, not the journey, and involve driving for 10-14 hours straight — so the idea is to make as few as stops as possible. My road diet therefore is gas station hillbilly x keto bro: beef jerky, nuts, coffee, and Smart Water (or any other electrolyte-loaded water). All the salt means you only need to pit stop when your car does, no matter much you drink, while a zero carb regimen blunts any possible post-prandial zzzs; there’s nothing worse than feeling super full when you’ve got six more hours in a car, even if you have that many episodes of You’re Wrong About left in your podcast queue.

The deep flaw in this plan is that you’re totally at the mercy of the gas station and whatever it merchandises. It’s sort of cheating, because going with the flow is how I approach long drives, but on my usual run between New York and Georgia, I’ve taken to plotting out where the territories of Wawa and Sheetz begin and end to guarantee access to actually edible jerky (the national brands are all trash now, RIP Field Trip) and potable coffee. (As someone who has no particular dog in that regional skirmish, I think Wawa and Sheetz are equally good? SORRY.) At the end of the day, it’s a road trip, and you can’t really appreciate arriving if you haven’t suffered along the way. — Matt Buchanan, executive editor

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2FCgQ6A https://ift.tt/2ZGSHD8

From Swedish Fish to charcuterie, these are the snacks that keep Eater staffers sated on long car rides

This summer, the road trip was the only option for many of us to get in some kind of vacation or pay a long-overdue visit to faraway loved ones. And given the unpredictability of food options along routes these days, road trip snacks — always an essential item on the road trip packing list — were more important than ever.

There are certain essential qualities to a road trip snack: You should be able to eat it with one hand and with minimal mess. But beyond that, there are several interpretations of the genre. Road trip snacks may be the foods you find at gas stations and convenience stores, or indulgent treats that make the trip more bearable. Some road trippers select snacks based on their resemblance to an actual balanced meal, or on whether or not they’ll ensure the driver stays alert at the wheel. Eater staffers’ preferred snacks run the gamut. Here’s what fuels them through long car rides these days, as well as in better times.

The sweet

Bit-O-Honey: Bit-O-Honey works as a road trip snack because you can eat an entire bag of them and not feel awful (trust me, I just did this on a six-hour drive from Northern to Southern California). It’s somewhat hilarious that this honey-flavored taffy seems to only be available at truck stops and gas stations. Drivers and passengers alike will crush hours gnawing on these glorious sweets, with microscopic almond pieces giving a modicum of texture. Getting the sticky bits out of your teeth is the rest of the fun. — Matt Kang, Eater LA editor

Swedish Fish: I always have a bag of Swedish Fish on hand for a road trip. They perk you up, they’re chewy and sweet, and they’re the kind of candy I don’t eat every day. It’s also the ONLY time I drink Red Bull. — Lesley Suter, travel editor

Frozen Snickers: I’ve always maintained that a frozen Snickers bar is much, much better than an ice cream Snickers bar, the latter being an inferior product that melts too quickly and the former being something that will last in the car. — Ryan Sutton, Eater NY chief critic/data lead

Sour Patch Kids: My husband and I both agree that Sour Patch Kids are an absolute must on the road. I prefer the watermelon, but he likes the classics. I’m still bitter that the classic recipe seems to have changed, though; I swear they’re not as sour as they used to be. — Rachel Blumenthal, Eater Boston editor

Beaver Nuggets: Road-tripping in Texas means you have to stop by Buc-ee’s and grab a bunch of their packaged snacks. Despite the unfortunate name, the Beaver Nuggets (actually sweet corn puffs) are really great. — Nadia Chaudhry, Eater Austin editor

Trail mix: I buy Archer Farms trail mix from Target — specifically the Monster one with tons of chocolate. Ignore the raisins. — Ellie Krupnick, managing editor

The savory

Snyder’s of Hanover Pretzel Pieces, Honey Mustard & Onion: These carry a Midas touch, covering your fingertips in a golden powder that plays off plain hard pretzels with two sources of tangy-sweet flavor: onion and honey mustard. Grasping for the few thin pieces that hold more powder than pretzel turns every bag into a treasure hunt. — Gabe Hiatt, Eater D.C. editor

Blue Diamond Almonds, Bold Wasabi & Soy: Those thin tubes of wasabi and soy sauce almonds are my road trip snack of choice for a number of reasons. First, they give you all the savory and salt pop of potato chips without the gross “ugh, did I just eat a whole bag of potato chips?” hangover. Second, the pain of wasabi build-up is a great way to stay awake during more monotonous stretches, far less cliched than slapping yourself or other self-abuse you see in the movies. Third, its narrow container is perfect to just tip into your mouth — an act that seems obscene (and obscures your vision) when it’s a chip bag, but makes perfect sense when the bag is long and narrow... and it saves your steering wheel, upholstery, etc. from every road tripper’s nemesis: snack grease. — Eve Batey, Eater SF news editor

Corn Nuts: Corn Nuts are not the sexiest snack, but they fit conveniently in your cupholder and you can just pick at them and shove a handful in your mouth with relative ease. Bonus: If you drop some, they don’t melt all over your car like a bunch of jerks. — Stefania Orrù, coordinating producer

Pizzeria Combos: Combos are so good, but not just any kind: pizza-flavored Combos are the best. They are super salty, bite-sized, and filled with some type of cheesy pizza flavoring. It’s like getting to dip a pretzel in cheese in every bite. I will always eat the whole entire bag on the road regardless of how long the drive is. — Stephen Pelletteri, executive producer

Regional chips: I go for regional takes on barbecue/red hot chips, especially if I am in a new-to-me area where there’s more opportunities to experiment with unfamiliar brands. Pennsylvania gas stations are the best bet for the intersection of multiple brands: One place might get you Snyder’s, Wise, Herr’s, Martin’s, Middleswarth, Utz... No real interest in mesquite/sweet varieties, though. — Missy Frederick, cities director

Ritz Bits, cheese: I only ever buy them at rest stops; I’m scared to invite them into my life outside of that context. — Emma Alpern, senior copy editor

The more holistic meal plans

Carrots and celery: My most recent preferred road trip snack is just straight carrot sticks and celery. I did that on a road trip recently and, magically, I didn’t feel like crap at the end of the trip. Plus, they have that snap and crunch that’s a necessity for a good snack. — Brenna Houck, Eater Detroit editor

Cheese and charcuterie: On the very Los Angeles end of the spectrum, I get mini-cheese and charcuterie boards from Lady & Larder in Mar Vista and then hand feed my boyfriend soft cheeses and cured meats while he drives. — Nicole Adlman, cities manager

Beef jerky, nuts, coffee, and electrolytes: Most of my road trips of late are about the destination, not the journey, and involve driving for 10-14 hours straight — so the idea is to make as few as stops as possible. My road diet therefore is gas station hillbilly x keto bro: beef jerky, nuts, coffee, and Smart Water (or any other electrolyte-loaded water). All the salt means you only need to pit stop when your car does, no matter much you drink, while a zero carb regimen blunts any possible post-prandial zzzs; there’s nothing worse than feeling super full when you’ve got six more hours in a car, even if you have that many episodes of You’re Wrong About left in your podcast queue.

The deep flaw in this plan is that you’re totally at the mercy of the gas station and whatever it merchandises. It’s sort of cheating, because going with the flow is how I approach long drives, but on my usual run between New York and Georgia, I’ve taken to plotting out where the territories of Wawa and Sheetz begin and end to guarantee access to actually edible jerky (the national brands are all trash now, RIP Field Trip) and potable coffee. (As someone who has no particular dog in that regional skirmish, I think Wawa and Sheetz are equally good? SORRY.) At the end of the day, it’s a road trip, and you can’t really appreciate arriving if you haven’t suffered along the way. — Matt Buchanan, executive editor

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2FCgQ6A via Blogger https://ift.tt/32vjvbk

[danvolodar]

A brief note on why I think the new Bladerunner a bad movie

First off, let me be clear: I liked Bladerunner 2049 visually; environment artists surely knew their job. But in what comes to the plot, and especially plot continuity from the original movie, frankly, it’s a fragging catastrophe.

There will be SPOILERS below!

1) The setting and its historical background. It makes no goddamn sense whatsoever.

In the original movie, Tyrell told Roy that he made Nexus 6 replicants as good as he possibly could; and Roy slew him right then. How comes there’s a fertile Nexus 8 model without a limit on life duration?

The Blackout: apparently, according to an anime extra, a few replicants pulled off a global operation that erased all electronic archives along with their backups around the world. This is beyond ridiculous, an incredibly lazy way to plug a few holes in the story.

A couple dozen years after massive replicant rebellions, and after the Blackout that the replicants did, producing replicants is again legal, because apparently now they’re “safe and subservient”. In some unspecified way. Like, they’re supposed to be unable to lie, but both K and Luv (the protagonist and a leutenant of the BBEG, a combat secretute) do so without any issue.

2) The basic premise of the movie, “good replicants against the wicked corporation”, has little to do with cyberpunk, and less to do with original Bladerunner. Consider for a moment that the original had no villains (and no heroes, either), even Roy was but a man driven insane by the fear of impeding death, still capable of compassion yet, for all his madness.

In cyberpunk, it’s not the people who are flawed, it’s the system. High tech, low life; whatever you do, you’re still just a brick in the wall. But Bladerunner 2049 is not cyberpunk, it’s a 2010ies action film.

3) On that note, the BBEG. Holy hell, where do I begin. The stupid and overused trope of evil weird eyes (in a setting where eyes were cloned years ago)? His motivation, conquering the stars, so non-evil they actually had to show him killing a random newly made replicant on screen simply to showcase how weevil he is? Hell, his motivation at all - making the replicants that’d be able to reproduce naturally, while he owns the company that makes its bucks by producing them?! How does that make any modicum of sense?

4) The replicant rebellion. “Okay we usually hide among the people, but just for you we all gathered in this room so we can step from behind the columns dramatically to show off that we have an army”. Was this bit written by a preschooler? Is this goddamn Hunger Games or what?

5) The protagonist’s main plotline, the investigation.

“I know I’m not really a replicant but a real man because I have a memory that was not made artificially, and to hell with the fact that I was just told it could be implanted just as easily!”

“I know the girl who watched my traumatic childhood memory is the real mucguffin because she cried when she watched it!”

“I have a clue, an irradiated toy - it surely must come from the only seriously irradiated place on the planet, where a macguffin has been waiting for me for dozens of years subsisting on nothing but whiskey!”

“As I walk through a sandstorm in an irradiated desert, I encounter a bunch of beehives with bees still alive and flying, I guess I’ll just stick my hand inside for no reason at all, other than to have a stinging insect on my hand - haha see it’s a reference to Rachels’ Void-Kampf’s test questions from the original movie, guess I’ll go find a tortoise and flip it over next fgafsasdjh!!!”

“Working for the police and tasked with eliminating a mucguffin that has a potential to destroy the world as I know it, I will simply report it’s been taken care of, no questions will be asked and no proof requested!”

6) Apropos of police. The combat secretute simply walks into the police precinct, kills whoever she wants with no consequence; protagonist’s boss knows she did it, and yet after a while the secretute again freely walks into the building and kills her with no one the wiser.

Then she goes to retrieve the mucguffin, kicks the protagonist’s teeth in, retrieves what she came for, but leaves the beaten hero behind - sparing him a bullet between the eyes. Just... what the hell?!

7) The subplot with protagonist’s weird AI girlfriend. Okay, so a cop has an AI that’s made by the corp he’s supposed to be investigating. Naturally, the AI snitches. However, when the protagonist has to lay low for a while, the AI asks to be moved to a portative device so that “the corp wouldn’t be able to get info on protag from its memory”. It’s not like the corp has a backup in its cloud or anything, right? Naturally, the portative device is later crushed under the combat secretute’s heel to AI’s wailing of “NOOO I LOVE YOU” in a scene as cliched as it is lazy and cheap. (To be fair, this was a tad bit rectified when the protagonist later sees a holo advert of the same AI that uses all the same phrases his copy used on him, showcasing how much canned bullshit she fed him).

I am frankly not sure even a director’s cut can fix any of those...

[deepspacepirate]

Director Orson Krennic: a character analysis

(Or, a rebuke to a post that got way out of hand, and I ended up dumping literally every thought I have about Krennic, so I decided to make it into its own independent meta.)

Yes, Krennic’s a poor guy who just wants some respect and never seems to catch a break. But he’s also a ruthless and Machiavellian narcissist with a dastardly sense of fashion. One doesn’t negate the other. His character is an interplay of both.

Krennic doesn’t come from the same posh background as other imperial officers and faces much classicism as a result. It’s undeniable that he is incredibly ambitious. He had to be in order to get to his position, both in the Republic Corps of Engineers and as the Director of Advanced Weapons research (aka the Death Star), in the face of much resistance. It’s quite admirable, really, and he sees it as a source of pride as well. Everybody loves a rags to riches story.

His bombast, ego, ambition, and lust for power are not things he’s ashamed of. In fact, these traits in themselves are not bad, nor do they make him a bad person. Problems arise because of these traits in combination with the following, mostly of which are traits of narcissists. He’s less entitled than your average narcissist and has evidence to back up his ego, but still a narcissist.

He is afraid of taking risks. He clings to the rails of the bureaucratic ladder instead of staking it out on his own in a field like pure research, where you can either be wildly famous or wallow in obscurity. Galen says this to him in the Rogue One novelization, and boy does it hurt because he knows it’s true. Because he fears taking his own path, he’s at the behest of the Empire. All opportunities that present themselves to him will be ones that further the Empire’s own goals. Not that he has a problem with them.

Speaking of which, Krennic doesn’t have real goals; he doesn’t know what success for himself looks like. In full accordance with being a raging narcissistic, he’s an ambitious social climber whose only goal is to be powerful. What that looks like, we have no idea.

Before we go any further, I want to make an important comment about power. Power is not inherently evil. Wanting power doesn’t make you a bad person. Being powerful just means having the ability to effect change. You can use it to command the massacre of millions of people, but you can also use it to create a system for sustainable energy. Power is not an end, but a means to an end.

That said, being powerful isn’t actually a real goal. When you set goals, you want them to be SMART. Goals must be specific, measurable, attainable, reasonable, and have a time deadline. Krennic’s goal is neither specific nor measurable (which renders consideration of the latter three letters moot).

There are so many ways to be powerful including, but not limited to: senator, social media mogul, actor, political activist, prominent author, famous architect, and successful tech entrepreneur. “I want to be powerful,” is so vague, it may as well not even be a goal at all. And if you don’t even know what your goal looks like, how can you measure it? How do you know that you’ve reached it?

A quest for power ends when one has enough to execute on whatever end goal they have, but Krennic has none, so his quest for ever greater power never ends. He’ll just keep climbing the bureaucratic ladder to the top. The only way to climb the ladder is by serving your superiors, so the Empire’s goals become his goals.

He has problems with authority. He hates all of them. He wants to have the freedom to do things on his own terms, but they won’t let him. That’s the consequence of working for somebody else. And when you work for somebody else, you know you don’t have all the power.

Now, I want to go on a brief tangent about Galen’s business partnership offer to Krennic. It was an out for Krennic. The perfect out, in fact. He would have been unbelievably happy there. Barring responsibility to shareholders, there are no restrictions as to what entrepreneurs can do; they get to be their own bosses, set their own goals, set their own rules, do whatever they want. The only other authority figure in the vicinity would be Galen, who wouldn’t even be his superior. He’d be working alongside his best friend, whom he knows respects him.

In fact, when Galen first tells him about the project, Krennic is reeling, literally incapable of saying anything other than dazedly repeating Galen’s words with a question mark at the end.

For a brief moment he glimpsed a new destiny opening before his eyes, a window into a future he had never imagined for himself, a path to an entirely different life, and yet just as quickly as the window opened, it closed, slammed shut as much by long years of training as by a feeling of trepidation.

This is such an incredibly tragic moment when you consider how different things could have been had he said yes. How much better things could have been. A life without betrayal and loss. Unfortunately, he was too afraid to take it.

So he’s stuck in the position of simultaneously hating his bosses and also wanting respect from them. This becomes a problem because…

He’ll do what it takes to get what he wants, but he’s not a spineless bootlicker. He’s much too prideful for that. The thing about people ruthlessly ambitious as Krennic is that they don’t bow down to anybody. Bureaucrats hate this. To them, Krennic is just an uppity chav ¹ who thinks he can make it to the top. I have no doubt Krennic picks up on the fact that he’s hit a glass ceiling. He can’t woo them; they hate him just for being him. It’s unbelievably petty, so he’s petty right back at them. They owe him respect for all he’s done! So he seeks to undermine the authority of those above him (i.e. Tarkin) the only way he can - via manipulation and cunning. It’s what he’s good at and he knows it.

Despite all of the above, he seeks external validation (a mark of narcissists), such as rank squares, a dramatic cape, and being in charge of big projects. Narcissists are both immensely prideful and profoundly insecure. His ruthless ambition is a direct consequence of these insecurities. He needs to show off for any modicum of self dignity. Even in the presence of Galen he gets defensive about his position.

“But I am serious,” Galen cut in. “And I do understand your position. I just think you deserve more than…this,” he added, motioning in a way that took in the Corps of Engineers headquarters. Krennic swallowed to suppress a sudden defensiveness, a raw desire to tell Galen Erso that this was all a sham; to load that datapad of Erso’s with the schematic of the battle station and show him what he was really in charge of.

This ties closely to his lack of concrete goals. Without those, everybody else always determines your worth: whether you stand up to their expectations. When you can set your own goals and your own standards for success, you can fall back on those. If you fall short of someone else’s expectations, you can say, “Fuck that. This is what matters to me and I meet my own standards.” But Orson has none of those. He’ll never feel self fulfillment, and he’ll never be personally satisfied with himself.

He doesn’t want to be responsible for his actions, specifically, the ones that reflect poorly on him. I don’t know why Krennic doesn’t have a goal more concrete than “be powerful”, but if had to guess I’d say it’s because he’s afraid of failing at that goal. It would be a failing on his own part and there’s no plausible deniability. He can’t say, “They gave me unrealistic goals,” or, “ They were plotting against me.” It falls on him now. He’s more than eager to take credit for his success, he’s too afraid to take responsibility for his failures. Even though Krennic hates being beholden to anybody, he’s afraid of being completely independent. He’s a child that wants to be a grown up, but he doesn’t want to wake up and smell the taxes.

Everything he does, his ambition, his quest for power, his Machiavellian tendencies, even his dramatic fashion sense, all stem from the fact he is a sad and lonely narcissist trying to prove himself in place where nobody wants him to succeed. It all feeds back into itself. He’s put himself in an environment that exacerbates his narcissistic traits, and he becomes more and more ruthless as he tries to maintain his dignity and feed his ego.

– Notes 1. I apologize for using this word; I don’t know another less offensive word that more accurately describes what the posh officers think of him

Bonus: AU where Orson accepts Galen’s business proposal and quits his job in the Corps of Engineers. The Death Star never gets built, nobody dies, and it’s happy endings for everybody.

[sfdfmoviereviews]

Power Rangers (2017)

Eventually, it’s morphin’ time.

Director Dean Israelite gives us Andrew (Emilio Estevez) Jason (Dacre Montgomery), a high school quarterback who has ruined his chances of a football career with a cow based prank and now has to spend every Saturday in detention. When he, fellow detainees Brian (Anthony Michael Hall) Billy (RJ Cyler), Claire (Molly Ringwald) Kimberly (Naomi Scott), criminal Zac (Ludi Lin) and basket case Trini (Becky G) find a series of mysterious coins in the local gold mine, they are pulled into an eons old struggle to defend life itself from Rita Repulsa (Elizabeth Banks), and to defeat her must become the Power Rangers. SPOILERS HO.

Power Rangers nicely illustrates the strange state of franchise cinema at the moment. A reboot of the mid-nineties series (this is the original teens-in-Angel-Grove series, and has nothing to do with the myriad of sequel series nor the original Super Sentai material) that debuted to the joy of eight-year-olds and consternation of parents everywhere, it’s aimed at a teen demographic while only remembered by people who are now pushing thirty. And so, this rehash of a fondly remembered chunk of children’s TV features both Bryan Cranston crawling naked across the mud of a battlefield surrounded by the bodies of his team mates and the implied jerking off of a bull within five minutes of the lights going down. Such is the nature of the genre reboot; it draws on children’s entertainment but aims for a more mature audience, and thus must reframe those robot dinosaurs and magic tchotchkes into something grounded enough to hold attention.

In this Power Rangers largely succeeds. The focus here is not on the mechanics of power ranging and gigantised monsters, but rather on the dynamic of our five teens with attitude. Comparisons with The Breakfast Club are unavoidable, but complementary; here are five people from disparate backgrounds coming together for something greater and becoming friends throughout. The great success of Power Rangers is that where that melodrama might be used as a crutch for the action, so that the audience may be coaxed into a willing suspension of disbelief vis a vis robot dinosaurs and the screenwriter may emerge with some sense of dignity, here it is the totality of the premise. The teens we watch are far more rounded than might be expected- full of failing and humanity and far more willing to grow than the angsty men that usually fill out super hero costumes. The real conflict here is internal and startlingly generational; the power rangers must prove to both themselves and the ancient wall-head which goads them into action that they are capable of great good, regardless of what misdeed their past may hold or flaws they may possess. At a time when an old white guy is claiming being rich is a superpower, Power Rangers’ commitment to showing the young and human as heroic is something of a revelation.

Structurally this approach leads to some problems. That focus on character means there is very little in the way of action for the majority of the film; we get some explosions and training montages early on but that’s it until the finale, which follows a truncated variant of a a typical Power Rangers episode fight/zords/megazord structure, and is filled with shout outs to the old show’s stock footage and a whole lot of collateral damage. If you are invested in these characters it’s fine, but there is a definite itch for some fights and explosions through most of the running time. Conversely, this lack of action means we don’t have to spend much time trying to process the film’s terrible design. WHAT IS GOING ON HERE:

There are some other misses here. The very nature of the franchise means our teens with attitude have to deliver some genre dialogue, and talk of morphing and crystals and holding the line clash with the understanding of these characters the film has built. Bill Hader’s Alpha 5 falls utterly flat as the comic/relief/exposition monkey, as do the creaky references to other franchises. The Krispy Kreme product placement is far too overdone.

There’s a laudible attempt to improve the diversity of superhero movies here, but it is not entirely successful. Trini’s establishment as the first LGBT superhero is undercut by the fact that her sexuality isn’t made explicit; it’s brought up by Ludi Lin’s Zac and Trini responds with some angst regarding her family’s fondness for labels or somesuch. Whatever she may be it’s apparently defined by a painful home life. Similarly, RJ Cyler’s Billy gives us the first superhero living with a mental illness. This is something no other franchise has even been criticised for failing to grapple with yet, but it’s hard to escape the sense that Billy’s place ‘on the spectrum’ is little more than a justification for some tired black nerd tropes and too-pure-for-this-world guff; I don’t think that’s Israelite’s aim at all but it is the impression it makes. In fairness, this does put the other rangers in a position to show us their reaction to Billy’s nature and their resulting alternation between respect and concern is reasonable and plausible. Again, this is all laudible, but it’s 2017 and the movies should be better than this.

Performances are generally fine. While the script is deftly written and filmed it asks for little more than commitment and a modicum of nuance from the sexy teens who fill out the cast, and for the most part they succeed. The one exception is Ludi Lin as Zac, who just isn’t up to the task for some reason. Cranston and Banks get to do some scenery eating, although Banks has little more to do than stagger around in some moody costumes and spout references to the original show. As noted above Hader’s Alpha 5 doesn’t work, but this has little to do with Hader’s voicework.

Despite some flaws, Power Rangers is surprisingly earnest and a refreshing change from the long running franchises that surround it. You should give it a watch.

Tim

[mosmindmanifested]

The Illuminati!?!?!?!?

What has now become a ubiqutous meme, 'The Illuminati' is a term used to describe an international and underground group of super-villians bent on world domination and human enslavement. They are famously associated with world political leaders, famous music artists, bankers and other members of society with high levels of authority, power, or influence. The Illuminati has become a blanket term, encompassing all possible secret societies, or potential for clandestine groups of individuals with ill intent for the public at large. I am here today declare myself one of the 'crazy' conspiracy theorist that buys in to the potential of such a movement being true. One thing I like to do when assesing a conspiracy theory, is to try to understand the motivations behind its possible existence. As Henry Kissinger, famous war criminal and Machiavellian political leader under the Nixon administration would say: 'Power is the greatest aphrodisiac'. Control over others has been a prominent theme since the dawn of human civilization. Any great empire that has ever existed has had a expedient slave caste that was tasked to labour, servitude and, at times, complete subjection to the will of the ruling hegemon. The most egregious example that has been branded into the consciousness of the masses through hollywood influence is... you guessed it... the trans-atlantic slave trade; where West African merchants willing offered there Spanish commerce associates, the bodies and minds of their fellow West Africans. However, at the height of the industrial age, men like Edwards Bernays (nephew of Sigmund Freud and father of the Public Relations firm), and Joseph Goebbells (head of Nazi propoganda), with their keen understanding of human psychology, came to the stunning understanding that human beings yeild more productivity when they willingly engage in an action as opposed to when they are force. These wizards then went to work on using media to manipulate the masses and to manufacture the consent of an otherwise civilized public, to engage in the most anti-social behaviour. Stop and think about it for a moment. How on earth did Nazism become a thing? The easy and completely foolish assumption is to lump all of them into the category of 'evil', and dismiss their actions as a by-product of that evil. Many of these 'evil' Nazi's were regular people in their past lives; fathers, teachers, statesmen, brothers, artists, pillars of their communities. This is testament to the power of mass psychology and propoganda. It is no wonder that many of the key minds behind the Nazi movement were extradited to the United States where they were granted asylum. Someone must have been admiring the artistry behind the movement. Spaning fron the mid 1950s to late 60s, research into mass psychology and mind control continued in the very nation I call home, Canada. At the university of McGill, under the guise of a CIA intelligence project, subjects were given undisclosed amount of LSD6 and were subject to various trials that were aimed at creating a heightened suggestive state, and creating a docile mind-controlled being. This project was known MK-ULTRA. Its alumni include a famous test subject, Theodore J. Kaczynski 'The Unibomber', a domestic terrorist who would mail deliver pipe bombs to unsuspecting U.S. citizens. Intelligence agencies seem to have a keen interest on controlling the human mind and subjegating the human body. But why? What exactly do they have in store for us? Attaining higher profit margins is a zero sum game, and when you've already accumulated billions, what drives the insatiable lust to continue? What is the end game of an intelligence agency who wants to strip away autonomy of its citizens? Here is where things get weird. This is where I lose my faithfully rational audience that is unwilling to entertain the possibility of what I am about to say. I do not ask you to suspend your disbelief, and if at any moment, what I am about to say sounds too outlandish to entertain, feel free to stop reading at any moment. You see, I do not think the controlling elite is being motivated by rational means. I do not believe the Nazi regieme, or the communist movements figure headed by Mao and Stalin (120 million plus estimated deaths between them), was motivated by political gain or power. I believe there is an ontological battle going on, one that supercedes human wants, desires and ambitions. The battle between being and non-being. The battle between life and death. Darkness and light. Good and evil. Heaven and hell. You see, these underground groups are death cults. They venerate human degradation, strife, hardship, toil, death, war, self-destruction, and everything antithetical to human life and prosperity. They create 'agents of chaos' by self-replication. Through ritual abuse and trauma of the young, they are able to fashion the minds of their offspring to harbour and propogate this malevolent ethos. It was done to them when they were young. Media hints at this. How many stories have you heard of psychopathic serial killers and mass murders who faced traumatic upbringings. Of course, this does not suffice for a justification for their actions, but it truly represents and possible explaination. Trauma is cyclical. Hurt people hurt people, and through a program of traumatic abuse, new generations of degenerate and maladapted youth enter society. Look at the Jeffrey Epstein situation that has overrun the media right now, a powerful financial player who procured under-aged youth to be sex slaves for his wealthy business and political friends. On further examination on the island he would fly his clients out to, you notice some peculiar landmarks: a temple, underground tunnel systems, etc. Members of this death cult are obssesed with youth. They recognize an innocence and potentiality in them that they themselves were stripped of, and in an acts of pathological envy, go to unspeakable measures to make sure that these children are as malleable to their influence as possible. Members of this death cult are motivated by theological motives. It is not uncanny for these people to organize around specific dates and times to conduct elaborate rituals in service of pagan dieities. (For a dramatic rendition of this depravity, I suggest you watch visionary director Stanley Kubricks swan song 'Eyes Wide Shut', fittingly titled might I add). They claim to communicate with off world intelligences that collaborate in their organized efforts to influence mass culture and the global society at large. I suggest you youtube 'cremation of care' ceremony. They are the enemies of humanity in human form. A snake eating its own tail; devouring those that they depend upon. I house the opinion that their fractured mental states, as a result of meticulous abusive efforts from parents or gaurdians, completely destroys their sense of self, and like in the case of the clinical narcissist, they function through performative emotion and expression. But what if a regular folk, not brought up in such nightmarish circumstances, wanted to participate in such a system, and reap the rewards of being a part of it? In comes ritual intiation. You must sell your soul. You must go on record committing the worst crime possible, to the most innocent victim possible, so that you are now bound to a state of obedience and secrecy. We all have heard of absurd gang/mafia rituals that initates have to perform to gain the trust and respect of their fellow members. These include but are not limited to: killing a rival gang member, killing an innocent civilian, cannibalism, acts of sadism, sexual abuse of another, being sexually abused by senior members and the list goes on. The same principal applies here. If you want to be a part of this network, you're going to have to make some sacrifices. I wish this type of activity was just in movies, but movies, as dramatic as they may be, have to take their influence from somewhere. What might be more disturbing, is just how commonplace this behaviour is. It is not isolated to a specific political or economic class, it is not bound to only certain countries and geographical locations. I can garuntee you, anywhere there are humans living in large cities, this network is alive and ready. So why aren't we aware of this? Why does the common pedestrian not house this information? Because ignorance is bliss. To become aware of such a grim reality would shatter whatever worldview you hold dear. The pain, the confusion, and the terror that such an insight would bring could not be withstood by most, and in an attempt to protect ourselves from such discomfort, we will do whatever it takes to guard our worldview, even if it is completely in contrast to reality. To know the truth would mean you would have you would have to entertain the possibility of being wrong. Can your fragile ego handle that? To know the truth would entail a modicum of responsibility. How will you live your life in the wake of this information? I do not blame you for being unaware. How can I? Had it not been for my unique experiences and encounters, I would not be subject to such information. But I can blame you for shutting it out. I can blame you for your lack of curiosity, your inability to entertain alternative possibilties, and your coward attempts at maintaining the status quo. Wake the fuck up. Look around you. Something is going on. There is a world out there that parallels our day-to-day activities, and whether you're conscious of it or not, it is playing a part in shaping the world you participate day-in and day-out. Namaste

[lindsaynsmith]

10 Best Horror Docs Every Horror Fan Should Watch

10 Best Horror Docs Every Horror Fan Should Watch https://ift.tt/2CFkqtU

There are a number of horror themed documentaries out in the wild and available for your viewing pleasure. Whether you’re in the mood for educating yourself on true crime, hoping to learn the origin of Halloween, or just want a behind-the-scenes peak at one of your favorite horror films you’re sure to find something to satisfy your thirst. Given the great abundance of titles available it would be foolish to try and narrow them down and rank a top 10. But we did it anyway. In an effort to provide FSR readers with a fun variety for this Halloween season, I, along with the assistance of the rest of the Horror Boo Crew, have dug through the pile and pulled out 10 docs we think every horror fan should watch. If you disagree with our choices, make your own list.

Keep reading for a look at 10 horror-themed docs that all horror fans should watch as voted on by Rob Hunter, Kieran Fisher, Brad Gullickson, Meg Shields, Jacob Trussell, and myself.

10. You’re So Cool, Brewster: The Story of Fright Night (2016)

If you have a question about Fright Night, this doc has answers and then some. From casting details, to the ins and outs of every single practical effect, to what the heck kind of monster Billy Cole was — this doc’s got it all. In fact, it’s so relentlessly thorough that even the biggest fan is liable to learn something. I for one get a real kick out of any and all anecdotes from the FX team, who were, at the end of the day, a gaggle of very talented and very coked out kids, “dealing with stupid chemicals in a rather stupid way.” Fright Night is so flagrantly made with love and this doc is a total testament to that. Tom Holland’s inescapably earnest final direct-to camera address is particularly moving. Though, Steve Johnson explaining how he absentmindedly melted the soles of his feet off while neutralizing an acid-soaked puppet is also…evocative. — Meg Shields

9. Why Horror? (2014)

What makes Why Horror? such a rewarding documentary is because the films subject, Tal Zimmerman, is us. He’s an actor and writer for Rue Morgue Magazine, but most prominently: he’s a horror fan. The type that will covet a Foreign Language poster for The Exorcist or search to the bottom of a bin of used VHS tapes in hopes of finding some rare, unique gem. But Why Horror? isn’t about horror films directly, but rather why we are attracted to the macabre. From the anecdotal to the scientific, Zimmerman and co-directors Rob Lindsay and Nicolas Kleiman navigate how multifaceted horror fans are. And while the film may be preaching to the choir that is the die hard horror hounds among us, the film successfully captures the essence of what being a fan of this genre really means. — Jacob Trussell

8. Nightmares in Red, White, and Blue: The Evolution of the American Horror Film (2009)

Horror has been a staple of film since the beginning of cinema. One could argue, and I would be that one, that horror is the most classic of all film genres. While horror films originate from all over the world, no country has had a larger impact or been more synonymous with the genre than America. This documentary rounds up a number of high profile horror icons — Joe Dante, John Carpenter, and George A. Romero to name a few — and provides a rundown of American horror from the earliest silent shorts all the way up to the modern day. It never dives too deep into any one film, but does a wonderful job providing a high level overview of America’s history with the genre. Die-hard horror fanatics and the casual observer are sure to get a kick out of this. — Chris Coffel

7. The Nightmare (2015)

I’ve experienced sleep paralysis before, which could make me biased when it comes to how haunting I find Rodney Ascher’s documentary, The Nightmare. But rather my own personal experiences gives the film a modicum of believability which otherwise I may not have had based on the outlandish stories at the heart of the film. Ascher’s documentary crosscuts these purported real life stories with Lynchian cinematic re-enactments. This blending of fact and fiction is a staple of Ascher’s work, which also includes the Kubrickian collage Room 237 and his television special Primal Screen. While I do think The Nightmare potentially crosses the line when it comes to exploiting some of its subjects, Ascher makes a clear line between himself and his film, actively working against the crutch of so many other documentaries: making himself the subject. — Jacob Trussell

6. Wolfman’s Got Nards (2018)

The Monster Squad was not unleashed upon this world to massive critical acclaim or box office success. In 1987, the film was a dud. Over time, thanks to cable television and VHS, Fred Dekker’s childhood saga of Universal Monster (shhhhhh, don’t tell that studio) hunting grew to vibrant cult status. Wolfman’s Got Nards not only chronicles that surprise journey for the filmmakers and cast but it explores the fans’ point of view as well. In digging into the passion that fuels fanaticism, director André Gower and producer Henry McComas elevate Wolfman’s Got Nards from your basic Blu-ray special feature and into a heartfelt celebration of pop culture. You don’t need to love The Monster Squad to appreciate this documentary, but if you do, you’re gonna deeply cherish the experience. — Brad Gullickson

5. Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday the 13th (2013)

Any horror franchise that runs as long as Friday the 13th has is bound to be a mixed bag, but even the lesser entries are fodder for fascinating behind the scenes information. This epic doc tackles each of the films with enthusiasm, detail, and first-hand accounts, and in addition to offering up plenty of new tidbits about the talent, MPAA cuts, production snafus, and more, it’s also entertaining in its own right as an exhaustively well-crafted making-of doc. — Rob Hunter

4. The American Scream (2012)

I love Halloween and always have. It’s been my favorite holiday all my life and for a number of years my family went all out in decorating our house. It wasn’t uncommon for trick-or-treaters to end up hanging outside in our front yard taking in all the festivities. I was convinced no family was more dedicated than ours when it came to Halloween. Then I watched The American Scream and discovered that other families create full on haunted houses. This may have burst my bubble some, but at least I can live vicariously through people that are crazier than I am. For those that have an interest in extreme decorating this is a movie that is a must for every October. — Chris Coffel

3. Best Worst Movie (2009)

The only thing that’s better than Troll 2 is the documentary dedicated to the movie and its legacy. As the title suggests, the doc examines the cultural impact of a movie which many people consider to be the creme de la creme of awesome trash. Personally I think Troll 2 is too unique and weird to be called trash, but whatever. Anyway, the doc is a hilarious and heartwarming celebration of a little movie that’s genuinely beloved by fans and the cast and crew that made it. No one, besides the director, are under any illusions about the kind of movie Troll 2 is. However, this self-awareness and sense of humor is what makes them perfect subjects for a documentary. This is as good as life gets. — Kieran Fisher

2. American Movie (1999)

Small town life doesn’t always present opportunities that enable us to conquer the world, but that didn’t stop Mark Borchardt from giving up on his dreams of becoming a micro-budget horror filmmaker. American Movie follows the aspiring director and his friends as they make a horror movie and all the setbacks that come with it — like having no money or conventional talent. The beauty of the doc, however, is just seeing how these people go about their lives. They don’t seem real, but they are. And they’re hilarious. That said, American Movie is also a sad film about folks who ultimately feel destined to never realize their delusions of grandeur. At the same time, there’s inspiration to be taken from seeing them try to all the same. — Kieran Fisher

1. Never Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy (2010)

Wes Craven started something special with A Nightmare on Elm Street as it’s a horror film, and eventual franchise, that gives personality to both its killer and its victims (even if the killer’s charisma wears off pretty quickly through the sequels as Freddy moves from nightmare factory to joke machine). This stellar, in-depth doc explores the franchise’s highs and lows equally with input from more than a hundred people involved in the films’ production, from directors and stars to the wizards who brought the makeup effects to glorious life. It’s an epic film that will fascinate genre fans and Elm Street fans alike as it reveals details, triumphs, and failures with honesty. — Rob Hunter

Go behind the scenes and read more entries in our 31 Days of Horror Lists!

The post 10 Best Horror Docs Every Horror Fan Should Watch appeared first on Film School Rejects.

via Film School Rejects https://ift.tt/23tjcnD October 12, 2018 at 10:21AM

[robgrayofficial]

HAPPY SATURDAY DEPLORABLES!!!This is u/ivaginaryfriend here and I'm back with all things dank and spicy from the past week! Before we jump into that, I'd like to remind everyone of the MAGA rally happening tonight in Richmond, KY! We'll have a MAGAthread up later on this afternoon for the rally so don't miss out on the HIGH ENERGY!!!!If you guys wanted to catch up on any past recaps, you can check them out here!Now, onto the show!Sunday, October 7th:TODAY'S ACTION:First Lady Melania Trump Visits Nairobi National Park🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:.@SecPompeo had a good meeting with Chairman Kim today in Pyongyang. Progress made on Singapore Summit Agreements! I look forward to seeing Chairman Kim again, in the near future.(Retweeting FLOTUS Melania Trump) Thank you Kenya 🇰🇪 🇺🇸SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Nancy leaking the playbook on smears , it would be a shame if this went viral wouldn't it?Lindsey Graham is on a RAMPAGE!!"Donald J. Trump didn’t create his supporters. They found him. They had been looking for someone like him to come along for decades."🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Spot the DifferenceHillary Clinton holds a rally encouraging Democrats to vote in November.The Left is destroying themselves with their own "memes"! LMAO!Monday, October 8th:TODAY'S ACTION:Presidential Proclamation on Leif Erikson Day, 2018President Trump Delivers a Statement Upon DepartureFirst Lady Melania Trump Visits KenyaPresident Trump Speaks at the International Association of Chiefs of Police Annual ConventionPresident Trump Delivers a Statement Upon ArrivalPresident Trump Participates in the Swearing-In Ceremony of the Honorable Brett M. Kavanaugh🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Christopher Columbus’s spirit of determination & adventure has provided inspiration to generations of Americans. On #ColumbusDay, we honor his remarkable accomplishments as a navigator, & celebrate his voyage into the unknown expanse of the Atlantic Ocean.Departing Washington, D.C. for the International Association of Chiefs of Police Annual Convention in Orlando, Florida. Look forward to seeing everyone soon! #IACP2018It was my great honor to address the International Association of Chiefs of Police Annual Convention in Orlando, Florida. Thank you! #IACP2018 #LESMAmerica’s police officers have earned the everlasting gratitude of our Nation. In moments of danger & despair you are the reason we never lose hope – because there are men & women in uniform who face down evil & stand for all that is GOOD and JUST and DECENT and RIGHT! #IACP2018We thank you. We salute you. We honor you. And we promise you: we will ALWAYS have your BACK – now and FOREVER! #IACP2018Every day, our police officers race into darkened allies, deserted streets, & onto the doorsteps of the most hardened criminals. They see the worst of humanity & they respond with the best of the American Spirit. America’s LEOs have earned the everlasting gratitude of our Nation!Great to see @AGPamBondi launch a cutting-edge statewide school safety APP in Florida today - named by Parkland Survivors. BIG PRIORITY and Florida is getting it done! #FortifyFL(Video)(Retweeting FEMA) ⚠️If you're told to evacuate for Hurricane #Michael, don't delay. Leave as soon as possible. Listen to @FLSERT and local officials for the latest on evacuation orders. Check your route before leaving, figure out a few places you can go & make sure to take your pets.SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Trump likes Taylor Swift 25% less nowFBI’s smoking gun: Redactions protected political embarrassment, not ‘national security’No. Next Question.I never thought I'd see the day when being opposed to confused 9 year old "transgender" children being given powerful hormone drugs would make one a "conservative". Yet here we are. The left has gone insane and anyone left with a modicum of common sense is now a conservative.🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Are you tired of winning?"WE ARE DONE BEING POLITE" - says people who have been burning shit in a hysterical rage for two yearsFacts 👏Trump JR is Right vote RepublicanTuesday, October 9th:TODAY'S ACTION:Presidential Proclamation on National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, 2018Ivanka Trump Visits the NASCAR Technical InstituteFirst Lady Melania Trump Visits EgyptPresident Trump and Ambassador Nikki Haley Deliver RemarksPresident Trump Delivers a Statement Upon Departure🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:The paid D.C. protesters are now ready to REALLY protest because they haven’t gotten their checks - in other words, they weren’t paid! Screamers in Congress, and outside, were far too obvious - less professional than anticipated by those paying (or not paying) the bills!Great evening last night at the White House honoring Justice Kavanaugh and family. Our country is very proud of them!Will be going to Iowa tonight for Rally, and more! The Farmers (and all) are very happy with USMCA!(Video)Big announcement with my friend Ambassador Nikki Haley in the Oval Office at 10:30am.Hurricane on its way to the Florida Pan Handle with major elements arriving tomorrow. Could also hit, in later stage, parts of Georgia, and unfortunately North Carolina, and South Carolina, again... ... ...Looks to be a Cat. 3 which is even more intense than Florence. Good news is, the folks in the Pan Handle can take care of anything. @FEMA and First Responders are ready - be prepared! #HurricaneMichaelFLORIDA - It is imperative that you heed the directions of your State and Local Officials. Please be prepared, be careful and be SAFE!REGISTER TO VOTE! http://Vote.GOP“President Donald J. Trump Approves Florida Emergency Declaration”Congratulations to our 114th Supreme Court Justice, Brett M. Kavanaugh! #SCOTUS🏛🇺🇸.@FLGovScott has been relentless in securing the funding to fix the algae problem from Lake Okeechobee - we will solve this! Congress must follow through on the Government’s plan on the Everglades Reservoir. Bill Nelson has been no help!(Retweeting FLOTUS Melania Trump) Thank you Kenya 🇰🇪 🇺🇸(Retweeting FLOTUS Melania Trump) Thank you Egypt 🇪🇬 🇺🇸(Retweeting FEMA) Flooding from Hurricane #Michael will affect several states. Finish preparations ASAP and get ready to shelter in a safe location.Make sure you’re getting weather alerts for your area and stay off the roads once rain and winds start. http://bit.ly/2ygFva8 evening in Iowa. GOD BLESS THE U.S.A.! #MAGA🇺🇸(Video)THANK YOU IOWA & NEBRASKA! VOTE, VOTE, VOTE! http://bit.ly/2yAUPhs Rick Scott) If you’re in an evacuation zone, I am urging you to leave RIGHT NOW. Do not risk your life or the lives of your loved ones- get out now.SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Hey! Steven Crowder here! I’m the creator of Louder With Crowder. You’ve probably seen my ‘Change My Mind’ videos on college campuses. I’m eager to answer your questions. Let’s get this started - Ask Me Anything!1,500 noncitizens may have been registered to vote in California DMV errorSelf-made billionaire says that the left has "literally" been taken over by evilTwo students had consensual sex. Then she changed her mind about it. Costs him $12,000 to Defend HimselfThe Left is promising to abuse power if they win; voters should take them seriouslyLEAKED AUDIO: Liberal activists are warned not to mention they were bussed in from NYC to campaign in conservative-leaning upstate New York - Washington Free BeaconPRESS BRIEFINGS, INTERVIEWS, RALLIES:WATCH PARTY: President Trump Rally - Council Bluffs, IA - 10/9/18🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:While Do: Hello Millipedes, I am human #38183 from /r/redacted, , , , Exit Subroutine: ORANGE MAN IS BAD MAN. Exit: You are Russian Bots.When you only program your NPC to react in a certain way...This is worthlessIt was on this day 2 years ago that GEOTUS dropped the best impulse line of all time in a debate. “Because you’d be in jail!”Wednesday, October 10th:TODAY'S ACTION:Presidential Proclamation on General Pulaski Memorial Day, 2018President Donald J. Trump Announces Eighteenth Wave of Judicial Nominees, Eighteenth Wave of United States Attorney Nominees, and Thirteenth Wave of United States Marshal NomineesPresident Trump Participates in a Signing Ceremony🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Walker Stapleton is running as the highly respected Republican Candidate for Governor of the Great State of Colorado. His credentials and talents are impeccable. He has my complete and total Endorsement!(Retweeting FEMA) As Hurricane #Michael nears land, take shelter & stay safe.📱Follow weather updates on your phone or radio.🔹 In a tornado WARNING, go to an interior, windowless room.🔹 If water comes in, go to the highest floor that’s not flooded but do NOT enter a closed attic.(Retweeting National Hurricane Center) NHC Director Ken Graham will provide a Facebook Live broadcast regarding Category 4 Hurricane #Michael at 8:45 a.m. EDT (7:45 am CDT)(Retweeting National Hurricane Center) A Storm Surge Warning remains in effect for much of the Florida Panhandle and Big Bend region, where life-threatening storm surge is expected today. Storm surge inundation could reach 9 to 13 feet above ground level between Tyndall Air Force Base and Keaton Beach FL @NHC_Surge(Retweeting National Hurricane Center) Hurricane #Michael. In addition to the life-threatening storm surge and wind impacts, heavy rainfall is expected across a large portion of the southeastern U.S. along Michael's track. These heavy rains are expected to extend well inland.(Retweeting National Hurricane Center) Hurricane shelter locations are accessible from: http://bit.ly/2ygFwec #HurricaneMichael(Retweeting The FAA) Due to #HurricaneMichael, flights in your area could be delayed and possibly cancelled. Please continue to check the status of your flight with your airline. You can also check the status of major airports at http://bit.ly/2yAUPOu . #FlySafe #TravelSafe(Retweeting NHC_Surge) A destructive and life-threatening storm surge event will occur along portions of the Florida Panhandle, Big Bend, and Nature Coast on Wednesday and Wed night. The worst storm surge is expected to be between Mexico Beach and Keaton Beach where 9-13' of inundation is possible.Despite so many positive events and victories, Media Reseach Center reports that 92% of stories on Donald Trump are negative on ABC, CBS and ABC. It is FAKE NEWS! Don’t worry, the Failing New York Times didn’t even put the Brett Kavanaugh victory on the Front Page yesterday-A17!We are with you Florida! http://bit.ly/2yexpyY Eric Trump) All my friends in Missouri, today is your LAST CHANCE to register to vote this November! It is very easy to do - simply go to http://bit.ly/2yD3kZd ! @HawleyMO will #MakeAmericaGreatAgain!(Retweeting FloridaNationalGuard) #HurricaneMichael is here, but so are we. Stay safe, Florida. #FloridaFirst #FLNGAlwaysThere(Retweeting USA Today) .@usatodayopinion: Democrats want to outlaw private health care plans, taking away freedom to choose plans while letting anyone cross our border. We must win this.Departing the @WhiteHouse for Erie, Pennsylvania. I cannot disappoint the thousands of people that are there - and the thousands that are going. I look forward to seeing everyone this evening.Couldn’t let these great people down. They have been lined up since last night - see you soon Pennsylvania!(Retweeting The White House) Earlier today: President @realDonaldTrump, joined by Homeland Security @SecNielsen, listens as @FEMA_Brock briefs reporters on the expected impact of Hurricane Michael on Florida and the Southeastern United States.Thank you Erie, Pennsylvania! Remember to get out and VOTE! #MAGA🇺🇸Massive overflow crowd tonight in Erie, Pennsylvania. THANK YOU to everyone who came out and joined us. Together, we are MAKING AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!Thank you Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office! #HurricaneMichaelThank you to @FEMA and all First Responders! #HurricaneMichaelFlorida Highway Patrol Troopers are all en route to the Panhandle, from all across the state of Florida - to help those affected by #HurricaneMichael. If you see them, be sure to shake their hands and say THANK YOU! #LESMSIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Melania Trump on #MeToo: Women Need to Be Heard, but 'Show the Evidence'Eric Holder rejects civility in call for violence: "When they go low, we kick 'em... That's what this new Democratic Party is about."Don't let this slide! "Kanye West is what happens when negros don't read" is an actual quote from CNN today.VERITAS - TENNESSEE SENATE: Phil Bredesen's Staff Says He Is Lying About Kavanaugh Vote in Undercover Video.PRESS BRIEFINGS, INTERVIEWS, RALLIES:WATCH PARTY: President Trump & Lou Barletta Rally - Erie, PA - 10/10/18🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Tomorrow we're celebrating National Coming Out Conservative Day. Wear your MAGA gear with pride!Never forget these great words!The differences in celebrities coming out politically.CNNPC Panel #4785Hillary Clinton says the time for civility is over.Thursday, October 11th:TODAY'S ACTION:Trump Meets with the Secretary of Homeland Security and the Administrator of FEMAOne Nomination Sent to the SenateVice President Pence Participates in a Conference on Prosperity and Security in Central AmericaPresident Trump Participates in a Signing Ceremony for H.R. 1551President Trump Participates in a Signing Ceremony for S. 3508, the “Save Our Seas Act of 2018”President's Interagency Task Force to Monitor and Combat Trafficking in Persons Annual Meeting🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:(Video)(Video)(Video)(Retweeting The White House) Moments ago, President Trump signed the Music Modernization Act, which will close loopholes in our digital royalty laws to ensure that songwriters, artists, producers, and providers receive fair payment for the licensing of music.President Trump provides an update on the response to Hurricane Michael:(Retweeting FNG) There are serious communication issues in the Panhandle after #HurricaneMichael. If you are worried about someone, visit http://bit.ly/2yiRa8C to report it. The State Emergency Operations Center will route these reports to the appropriate local agency for action! #FLStrongSIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:This aged well.Herschel Walker calls for CNN to fire Don Lemon over ‘racist’ Kanye West criticism2A KanyeToday is National Coming Out Conservative Day. Share your story of coming out conservative or as a Trump supporter🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Haters will say it’s fakeBest one yetIt’s very brave to come out as a Trump supporterKanye Leaving The Oval Office Meeting With President Trump TodayTwo terms, two genders, two scoops, two peas in a pod.Friday, October 12th:TODAY'S ACTION:Presidential Proclamation on National School Lunch Week, 2018Presidential Proclamation on Blind Americans Equality Day, 2018Presidential Proclamation on Minority Enterprise Development Week, 2018Ivanka Trump: "Together we will end modern slavery."A Message from President Trump on Hurricane MichaelPresident Trump Delivers Remarks Upon AF1 Arrival🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Working very hard on Pastor Brunson!So nice, everyone wants Ivanka Trump to be the new United Nations Ambassador. She would be incredible, but I can already hear the chants of Nepotism! We have great people that want the job.My thoughts and prayers are with Pastor Brunson, and we hope to have him safely back home soon!PASTOR BRUNSON JUST RELEASED. WILL BE HOME SOON!REGISTER TO VOTE! http://bit.ly/2yAUQ50 MADE, PROMISES KEPT!People have no idea how hard Hurricane Michael has hit the great state of Georgia. I will be visiting both Florida and Georgia early next week. We are working very hard on every area and every state that was hit - we are with you!Happy #NationalFarmersDay! With the recent #USMCA our GREAT FARMERS will do better than ever before!!The GREAT football (and lacrosse) player, Jim Brown outside the West Wing of the @WhiteHouse. He is also a tremendous man and mentor to many young people!Beautiful MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN rally in Lebanon, Ohio. Thank you! #ICYMI, watch here: http://bit.ly/2yj3MfO …SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Hey kids! Your parents are using you as tools.Antifa Breaks Windows, Deface Doors of Metropolitan Republican Club in Manhattan. They Left A Note: "Our attack is merely the beginning. We are not passive, we are not civil, we will not apologize." This Is Terrorism In America.ANTIFA try to ambush and intimidate Tommy Robinson. Laughs in their face.Hillary drops her security clearance before it gets revoked...I don’t know why, but this makes me tear up.PRESS BRIEFINGS, INTERVIEWS, RALLIES:WATCH PARTY: President Trump Rally - Lebanon, OH - 10/12/18🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:JOBS NOT MOBSKanye West and Donald Trump work out the logistics of a National Security issueA Message to the Racist CNN PanelJobs not MobsSaturday, October 13th:🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Happy 243rd Birthday to our GREAT @USNavy! #243NavyBdayPastor Andrew Brunson, released by Turkey, will be with me in the Oval Office at 2:30 P.M. (this afternoon). It will be wonderful to see and meet him. He is a great Christian who has been through such a tough experience. I would like to thank President @RT_Erdogan for his help!There was NO DEAL made with Turkey for the release and return of Pastor Andrew Brunson. I don’t make deals for hostages. There was, however, great appreciation on behalf of the United States, which will lead to good, perhaps great, relations between the United States & Turkey!SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:"Refusing to accept the results of an election is a direct threat to our democracy" -Hillary Clinton-WTF??? Democratic Candidate Stacey Abrams: 'Undocumented' Immigrants Are Part of the 'Blue Wave'Remember those "To Kill a Mockingbird" memes from the Kavanaugh hearing? Thought that was over the top? Well, a liberal white woman in Brooklyn has falsely accused a black 9-year-old boy of grabbing her ass. Thank God for surveillance video!Four arrested trying to steal postal ballot votes in favour of the _______ Party. Were paid, article doesn't say by who.🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Kentucky Pede Checking in from todays rally. Probably 2-3k here already.Coming prepared for the Richmond Rally!"We're not NPC's!" they all cried out in unisonSO MUCH WINNING!!!!!!Of course, no recap is complete without a few tunes to get you jamming through all these links of WINNINGRussian CreamKevin's HeartNo BystandersSee You AgainWake UpMAGA ON PATRIOTS! #robgray

[theconservativebrief]

Like a flight from New York City to Dallas, it took only a few hours for a viral romance to reach its final destination: problematic.

The story starts out fun enough: A woman and her boyfriend switched plane seats with another passenger so they could sit together, and may have, by the blessing of the goddess Aphrodite, set a long-lasting romance into motion. The woman they switched with hit it off with her new seatmate — they engaged in conversation, found out they were both vegetarian personal trainers, talked about fitness tips, bought each other proteins, went to the bathroom and changed, and wound up deplaning together.

What’s a little troublesome about the whole romantic saga is that the reason we know all these things is that the woman who switched seats and put this romance into motion shared photos and video of the whole thing on the internet, where it turned into a social media sensation — without the consent of the couple involved.

The story starts and ends with a woman named Rosey Blair, who was traveling from New York City to Dallas when she asked a woman to switch seats so Blair could sit near her boyfriend. Then she began posting to her Instagram story timeline, which she later cross-posted to Twitter over the course of 50-plus threaded tweets:

Blair’s initial tweet garnered more than 300,00 retweets and 800,000-plus likes. To put that in perspective, President Donald Trump’s tweet about saving the United States from North Korea — a tweet with foreign policy implications, since there are reports circulating that North Korea is not winding down its nuclear arsenal as promised — was retweeted only 19,000-plus times.

It’s not difficult to see why the story gained so much favor. The randomness of the chance encounter, the romance, the voyeuristic thrill — it’s a feel-good story that made the chaotic world we live in feel a little smaller, a little more friendly, and a little more hopeful. It’s the stuff you see in fiction, in romantic comedies, not in real life.

But what Blair did next turned this feel-good story into something a little more uncomfortable.

As the flight continued, Blair began documenting every interaction the new seatmates had. She took a picture of them sharing family photos. She relayed the conversation they had about their moms. She shared their food order. She speculated about their body language. She noted how they left for the bathroom together — all, apparently, without their knowledge she was doing so.

To some, Blair’s intense documentation crossed the line of privacy. Although they were all in a quasi-public space, she was photographing them and sharing those photos without her subjects’ knowledge or consent. As the story went increasingly viral on Twitter, many users began expressing discomfort with the impulse that led Blair to share the story in the first place, as well as with our collective urge to devour it as a simple feel-good story.

cannot stop thinking about how creepy that viral thread about the couple on the plane is. it’s unreal how the internet has poisoned our brains & concept of basic privacy so much that u could be 100 tweets deep on something like that & not feel weird about it

— Chelsea Fagan (@Chelsea_Fagan) July 5, 2018

Imagine realizing mid-flight that the people seated behind you on the plane have been tweeting about you and posting pictures of you. Nightmare scenario

— Tom & Lorenzo (@tomandlorenzo) July 4, 2018

This is one of many incidents that challenge our sense of boundaries, of privacy, and of interpersonal ethics in a digital age, and the mediation of the internet blurs our sense of what’s real and what isn’t, to a point where solid answers are hard to come by.

— Katherine Cross (@Quinnae_Moon) July 4, 2018

Blair did afford the pair a modicum of privacy by blurring out their faces, indicating that she knew that what she was tweeting could be potentially embarrassing — which seemingly turned out to be the case, sort of. When the Today show caught up with the couple to feature their story, the woman Blair documented, whose first name is Helen, did not want to be further identified or interviewed; the man was identified as former professional soccer player Euan Holden, who had no problem being identified and interviewed.

This story isn’t wholly unlike what happened to director Greta Gerwig in May, when she went to see a movie and had all her actions — the laughs, the groans, what she ate, what she drank, her behavior — live-blogged by a fellow moviegoer. Both stories seemed harmless at the time but were later criticized for not respecting the subjects’ assumption of privacy. The incidents also call into question where we draw the line when it comes to our social media habits.

What Blair did would probably be okay if it was just a text to her friends or a conversation at a future party; I, no doubt, would probably be enthralled to hear it told in person. Because of the way social media works, though, every tweet is just seconds away from being seen and shared by millions — and that changes the consequences of the story.

But blaming Blair for tweeting out the story in the first place might be a little too tidy and lets us all off a little too easy. Blair is part of a social media ecosystem that rewards users for these kinds of stories, fueling them with the gratification of “likes” and attention. We’re all part of it, and anyone who’s posted on Instagram or Twitter has probably done something for likes, hearts, or interactions with other humans. The problem is that we know what gratification feels like, but not many of us know what it feels like when the backlash and negatives outweigh that gratification.

If there’s a lesson to be learned here, it’s that we could all benefit from a little more consideration. Sure, Blair could’ve tweeted with more discretion or thought for her subjects’ feelings. But in this day and age, maybe we could all think a little more about what we put on the internet and into the world, and how it affects the people around us — including the people we’re tweeting about.

Original Source -> Plane Bae: how an in-flight matchmaker broke the internet

via The Conservative Brief