#the description doesn't like it is painfully realistic

[writers-potion]

How do I accurately include diversity, and not make it look like I’m just putting it in there for the sake of it?

Writing Diverse Characters - Things to Remember

Honestly, there's no definitive answer to this.

Your characters are people with clear goals, desires and a role to play in the plot. As long as they aren't just sitting there with little else but their race/gender/disability, etc. as their ONLY personality trait, at least you're on the right path.

As for representing a diverse character realistically, here are some things you can consider to get started.

Do's

RESEARCH. There are plenty of blogs/YT vids/websites that exist to help you! Meet people!

Get beta readers.

It doesn't have to be explicit. Racial identities become quite clear early on through the setting, name, and initial description(hair, eye/skin color, body shape, etc) without having to drum it into the readers each time. Gender diversity can be conveyed through the use of certain pronouns without awkward declarations.

Character first, diversity second. Please don't intentionally create a diverse character and then think about how you can push them into the cast. Have a working character, who happens to belong to a particular group.

Read works that have represented a group well. There are plenty of non-fiction works, movies and documentaries that capture the lives of people around the world with a good eye.

Use the correct terms/language

Include different types of diversity

Don'ts

Race/gender/diability is NOT a personality trait. Please. Telling me that you have a Korean girl tells me next to nothing about the character herself.

Using sterotypes. Now, it's all right if your character has a few sterotypical traits, but definitely not if sterotypes are the only thing they have.

Diversity is not a "shock factor". Suddenly revealing that a character is actually gay and has been in the closet all this time as a refresher so that it draws readers' attention? Not a good idea.

One diverse character does all. This can often be seen in female characters of slightly dated works where one woman will play the role of supportive mother, sister, femme fetale and sexy Barbie at the same time. Don't write a diverse character who basically does everything a diverse character can possibly be. All that it proves is that the writer is lazy.

Things I personally hate seeing:

Weird pronunciation of languages. As a Korean person, I always get turned off by works (mostly badly written fanfics, yes, I read those...) that try to transfer Korean dialogue directly onto the page without even checking for the correct way to spell them out. A similar example would be pinyin for Mandarin. Please, this makes the character sound stupid throughout...

Character sticking out almost painfully. If your character isn't from the region but have lived in it for a long time, what reason do they have not to blend in?

Relying on variety shows/dramas as reference. Media representation of diverse characters that are meant for entertainment is not the best source for authentic research. I die every time someone lists a number of Korean rom-coms they've watched for "research". IT DOES NOT COUNT.

As a last note, remember that there's no limit to the kind of characters a writer can writer. Accept that our job as writers is to step into other people's heads, not seeing things from one (our) perspective - and it is not going to be easy.

Hope this helps :)

[adachimoe]

Adachi's Mistake

One of the things that is never explained and seemingly left intentionally vague is Adachi's mistake.

After you hear his stupid bullshit on December 7th, he invites you to come find his real self, and you find him inside the TV. While he certainly says a lot of bullshit, I think this line is actually true. Adachi not taking his job seriously (implication being to the extent of messing up) is a recurring thing in the game, so much that him preparing Namatame to be transferred is something Dojima finds out of character or too serious for him.

Some of the meta text about the game (e.g. Adachi's character profiles) also mention him being transferred due to a mistake he made. So, while he does say a lot of bullshit, I think there's some truth to his mini-rant about this.

But what's the mistake he made? Hmm. I've read a lot of interviews and other meta stuff, and... I dunno lol. It doesn't seem to be in any of the stuff I've read. It seems fun to headcanon and speculate about. Maybe he did the exact same shit he's been doing in Inaba but his old boss was less tolerant than Dojima?

It seems that when this topic comes up amongst westerners, people automatically assume Adachi shot someone? That feels more like being American and assuming every country is America lol. And if we're being painfully realistic, he's a plain clothes detective so he wouldn't be carrying a gun to begin with unless it was a situation where it was deemed necessary that he should have one. (Also, I think I've posted about this before, but if Adachi is really just a gun nut, why the heck did he even become a plain clothes detective? Uniformed officers who work in the field would be more likely to carry one.)

I also think about the situation surrounding and reaction to Abe's assassination 2 years ago. Part of why that was such a huge spectacle is because gun violence there is very different (a lot lower). It gives me the impression that "a police officer accidentally shoots someone" would've been seen as a more major thing. In contrast, Adachi believes the mistake he made was something small, and the meta descriptions written about him in booklets seem to agree with this.

As far as civil servant transfers go in general, I am an idiot and went to read up about that on some Japanese websites. They occur every year around March/April and maybe again in the fall (matches up with Adachi saying he came to Inaba in the spring). It also seems pretty normal for civil servants to get transferred every 3-5 years, though things like "causing problems" can justify why you would get transferred.

Given that it's Adachi, maybe he didn't go drinking after work with his coworkers enough times and he gave them bad vibes so he got transferred, bwaha. Though he did go to New Year's Eve parties, so maybe he was actually a bit more social than I'm thinking...?

Random: I have learned that these "unexplained events" are called "noodle incidents", and I am shocked I recognized the reference... my older brothers used to read Calvin and Hobbes!

[imakemywings]

A+ Library Review: "Loveless" by Alice Oseman

This is not technically the first installment of this, but it is the first time I'm making it A Thing. A+ Library is my new segment where I review books with asexual and/or aromantic characters.

Previous review: The Circus Infinite by Khan Wong

The book description for Loveless is:

Georgia has never been in love, never kissed anyone, never even had a crush - but as a fanfic-obsessed romantic she's sure she'll find her person one day. As she starts university with her best friends, Pip and Jason, in a whole new town far from home, Georgia's ready to find romance, and with her outgoing roommate on her side and a place in the Shakespeare Society, her 'teenage dream' is in sight. But when her romance plan wreaks havoc amongst her friends, Georgia ends up in her own comedy of errors, and she starts to question why love seems so easy for other people but not for her.

The character: Georgia Warr, aro/ace

So let's get to it.

TL;DR: Thumbs up from me

Since Loveless centers entirely around the aroace experience, I will not be breaking the review into sections like last time.

Loveless is a coming-of-age story about Georgia's first year at college. It begins with her graduation party out of high school and ends with her establishing plans for her second year of college. It's very slice-of-life, with a focus pretty much exclusively on Georgia's interpersonal relationships and her personal growth.

Oof. Okay. Loveless was at times hard for me to read, and not because it's bad, but because it hit so close to so many of my own experiences at Georgia's age. There were so many times I felt myself going "Oh yeah, I remember that. Yep, there's that phase. Yep, I told myself that story too. Yep, yep, yep."

Just like Georgia, I considered myself someone with "high standards" who would inevitably break the romance and sex barrier when I got to college. This book hit on so many of my own insecurities from that phase, some of which I still struggle with at times, but I will try to be objective about this review nonetheless.

Loveless does a wonderful job of unfurling Georgia's journey, from the start where she considers herself "just like everyone else" but a bit slow on the romance front, to realizing she's Different, through the difficult process of starting to accept that difference as part of her.

Unlike my last review, Loveless earns its found family by showing how Georgia and her friends grow together and apart and back together--with additions. Everyone in Loveless is on their own journey--and at different stages of it. From Pip who's been out as lesbian since she was fifteen and eager for a first girlfriend, to Rooney who's long suspected she's not really straight, to Georgia who's only just grasping the words to describe her experience.

And sometimes they hurt each other! One of the complaints I had about One Last Stop was how all the relationships (protag's mom aside) are entirely fluffy feel-good. Loveless eschews that by showing how friends can hurt each other even when they don't mean to, and how people have competing needs, and how past struggles can impact your present. But in spite of that, it's clear how much all of the main cast grow to care for each other over the course of the book, such that the ending is truly heartwarming.

The prose suits Georgia's voice, which is to say it sounds like an 18/19 year old girl is speaking. That means it's not very eloquent, and it can be blunt and cringy, but in a very believable, realistic way to me.

Georgia's coming of age isn't limited to just her orientation. At the start of the book, she is painfully alien to herself. Georgia doesn't seem to know anything about herself, as if she's spent all her adolescence wrapped in a thick blanket glued to fanfic and refusing to interrogate any of her own feelings--which is probably what happened. It means that she has a very rough time when she enters college. Unlike many such stories, Georgia is not jumping at the bit to be on her own--in the moment when her parents dust off their hands and prepare to leave her with her boxes of stuff in her new dorm, Georgia contemplates begging them not to leave her.

Loveless really captures a sentiment I experienced with asexuality, which was the sense of being left behind by your peers, of feeling childish and immature. Desperate to shake the feeling, Georgia makes an admirable effort at "putting herself out there," doing all kinds of things she doesn't really think she'll like, but wants to give a try, just in case. In some cases, she bombs--but in others, like the Shakespeare Society, she really blossoms. I thought the book makes an excellent picture of a lost young person beginning their adult life with no real idea of who they are, and trying to solve that problem.

Perhaps most painful of all, Loveless captures Georgia's fear of not knowing what her future will look like now that whirlwind love affair-->marriage-->2.5 kids is off the table. It's particularly difficult for her because Georgia so desperately wants that romance--except that for her it's something of a mirage: as soon as it gets close--like when a boy tries to kiss her--all her interest is gone in a flash. Georgia wants to want romance and sex...but she doesn't, really. Even when she's accepted her orientation, she really struggles with what this means for the rest of her life, which also felt very relatable. Partnering up is seen as virtually inevitable, and as the book points out: life is scary! It's way less scary when you have a Person! Therefore, part of Georgia's insecurity and uncertainty focuses a lot on what her future is going to be, and it's not a question she's solved by the end of the book. But it is one she's becoming less afraid of.

There were a few things that struck me as odd, like Pip's claim she had never "fully connected" with friends who aren't Latina, a sentiment echoed by Sonil's refusal to accept his asexuality until he met other Indian people who also used the label...obviously there are certain things that friends who don't share your racial or cultural background may not fully understand, but the idea that you can't connect with anyone who doesn't share your same racial make-up is...uncomfortable, I think. But these remarks pass quickly.

Additionally, the way Rooney and Georgia berate themselves for "experimenting" comes off unnecessarily harsh to me...part of dating is learning whether you're compatible with that person. And yeah--sometimes that means figuring out if you are or are not attracted to them, or their gender more broadly. There's nothing inherently wrong with starting to date someone you're not sure you're into, and then realizing you aren't.

The book also beats Georgia's fanfic reading to death a little, in my view. It gets mentioned way more than it needs to, and citing specific ships and tropes a) is going to date the book like hell; and b) is irritatingly obtuse to anyone who doesn't know what "Stucky" or "flower shop AU" is.

If you're deep into the ace/aro online community, this book may come off as retreading a lot of well-trod ground for you. There's nothing especially ground-breaking in it. But if you're not so connected, or you're new to the aro/ace community, or you just want a book that still-coming-out you needed, I think this is a great pick.

Next review: The Bruising of Qilwa (TBP)

[kakashihasibs]

the character everyone gets wrong

sweaty soggy noodle man kakashi is who this is all going to be about so. I don't think everyone gets him wrong. a lot of people do but it's usually bc they're too horny to care lol

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

have you seen him? have you felt his vibes? he is lazy by nature and recoils away from most physical contact that isn't necessary to do his job (and even he doesn't seem to enjoy it). there are like 7 total people he even lets see his face (while knowing it is his face) and most of them are dead by the time he is 13. hang out? sure. do nice domestic couple things? sounds lovely. get naked and fuck? so an enemy can kill him or a loved one while he's distracted? no. he probably has tried scheduling his shits and showers with gai so he's never actually vulnerable. he's also so ace.

Aubu kakashi: "Tenzō I need you to stand outside the bathroom while I shit." baby tenzō: on it boss (thinks this is completely normal bc he is also in anbu)

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

uhhh that kakashi would not only have sex but would want you to call him daddy. that nearly 50 year kakashi who has never worn sunscreen in his life shouldn't actually look old/older. that a young looking kakashi is a health looking kakashi.

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

lol that insinuation that looking young is healthy

5. worst discord server and why

i have never been in a discord server longer than a few days. idk.

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

facebook dude bro fans whoops i misread this. i thought it just said fans. but shipping fans? idk kakairu is a notp for me but the fans aren't overly annoying? maybe the painfully ooc readerx shippers. I haven't seen many in a while tho so

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Iruka lol but only when shipped with kakashi. annoying loud-mouth chunin. whatever dude.

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

kakashi fucks and gai doesn't

9. worst part of canon

it's naruto man. everything after the land of waves arc lol

10. worst part of fanon

the bumbling husband and nagging wife characterizations from the kakairu fanon.

11. number of fandom-related words you've filtered

bruh lots idk lol

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

tenzō T-T

13. worst blorboficiation

i'm pro blorbo. i am rotating these fictional men in my mind at all times.

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

i don't know.

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

fangs v-v and scars.

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

people who love kakashi but don't give a shit about gai. those two are like a packaged deal in my mind. can't have one without the other. they are eternal rivals after all.

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

sometimes i just really need a deep dive into kakashi's head. i love the character study type stuff.

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

younger gai and tenzō bumping into each other bc they're both watching kakashi stand at the memorial stone bc they're both worried.

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

there is nothing i am mad/ashamed/horrified about but if you're wondering yes i do enjoy the fanarts of kakashi in bondage. lol

20. part of canon you found tedious or boring

the flashbacks are out of control. my memory isn't great but it's not that fucking bad holy shit girl

21. part of canon you think is overhyped

idk i feel like the parts of fandom i interact with are pretty realistic about how good something in Naruto is

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

Yaknow how Obito's dream that naruto sees is Obito is back in konoha and becoming hokage but Rin is still dead? like what does obito wish had changed? I think it's if Minato had recognized him. I think Obito was actually praying and hoping for Minato to realize who he was fighting. Obito had a seal on his heart. Minato could have saved him if Minato pulled his head out of his ass for more that 5 mins at a time.

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

none. my kakashi stubbornness knows no bounds

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

idk kakashi discourse is easy for me to ignore.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

none. i love hatefulness drama and kakashi.

[call-sign-shark]

I've been waiting impatiently for this chapter, Reb!! My apologies in advance 'cause this is going to be quite a long commentary.

From the get-go, I love that Nina sounds cold and unsympathetic from the get-go despite her polite words. She makes zero effort to hide her annoyance with Tommy lmao. Which is rendered even better when she just looked at the razor blade in his cap and is just like "oh whatever" while Tommy expected her to be scared (hence his nickname The Peaky Blinder Devil). This is a very interesting detail because 1. it's unusual for Tommy, 'cause he's used to exerting a certain power over people, and 2. It fleshes out Nina's strong spirit.

"There was a fiery stubbornness in her eyes, but it wasn’t intentional, or a mere way of presenting herself to the world. It was rooted in her very nature."

I am just in love with your prose here, Reb. The way you describe her fierceness flows naturally and doesn't seem forced. Even before this description, I envisioned Nina's behavior as something deeply rooted in her rather than a voluntary bratty way of behaving. So kudo to you!

Now the scene between Agnese and Nina was exquisite. I don't know how you did but you've managed to give realistic family vibes in your text. I feel like I'm wandering in this house: this is quite an intimate and pleasant feeling 'cause it creates ties between the reader and the characters. I'm particularly thinking about the topic of forced marriage and the line "Being a Teresa was not that uncommon", so painfully true. Also the scene between these two (I love how you portray their relationship by the way) is a beautiful critique of women's place during this era. Normally, the trope of the wild girl that doesn't want to get married but still has because of her times' codes is quite common, but you succeed in rendering it insanely interesting and we, as readers, can only root for Nina. I particularly appreciate this quote:

“Yes, but doesn’t it bother you?” Nina asked, her dark eyes full of obstinacy. “They don’t involve us in the business, but they use us as some sort of bargaining chip when it suits them.” She spat out.

You go, girl! Nina spits facts and her anger against the world is as legitimate as beautifully described.

It might be something personal 'cause I'm Sicilian, but gosh I laughed so much at Tommy trying to hard to remember all the info he has learned and being relieved he hasn't to remember every name and face of the family. THIS IS SO TRUE FOR ITALIAN FAMILY. Then, I also laughed (a bit more sadly) at his sarcastic thought "They had to make things the right way // but it just looked like some kind of sale". You can't imagine how much I loved this line. A short, simple, but undeniably powerful image to illustrate arranged marriages.

Nina's relationship with Tommy is delightful, as well as their exchanges. On the one side, we have this young woman with her teeth bared, and on the other side, we have that older gangster who appreciates provoking her. Yet, her quick wit always leads her to have the final word and I love this. Despite the mutual distrust, I feel like Tommy particularly enjoys her presence, or at least his intelligence is stimulated by her. Nina would prolly yell but... I kinda ship them already 🤭

Now, the parts that got me squealing... First of all, I love how you slowly built tension between Tommy/Nina without being cliché. It's far from being love at first sight. Quite the contrary, she's supportive of Agnese and is kind of happy for her -- which I found very endearing. It's glad to see there is no competition between the two of them. Taking this into account, I want to ask you a question: how? How dare you be that talented? The way you construct the family diner scene got me speechless. From Nina's slow-building irritation to the women making more or less direct and nasty comments to her... This was an emotional whirlwind. You managed to instill a slight claustrophobic sensation in me, just like Nina probably feel.

“Look at them, sitting at the table like fucking kings.” Nina murmured, looking out the window as she scrubbed a plate. “God forbid they raise a finger.”

I enjoyed this line a lot. This is so true, and I could perfectly picture it. Nevertheless, this leads me to the final scene, and ... I AM YELLING. Once again, your talent for description and balancing tension reveals itself as Tommy's eyes dive into her and have for immediate effect to quiet her. As if the ice of his iris tamed the fire of her: it was such a poetic moment, probably my favorite of this whole wonderful chapter! And the fact he helped her with the plate of coffee, not minding Pietro's comment, made me fall a little bit for Tommy LMAO. And you perfectly ended this incredible chapter with Nina snapping at her brother.

Reb, I often have to force myself a little bit when I start reading a Tommy work. Not that it doesn't interesting, but I have to focus more and tell myself "okay, now we're gonna take a serious read at it". But since you post the first part, I've become addicted o your new series. There's something refreshing in the way you address the topic of arranged marriage. Whether it is the "relationship" between Tommy and Nina, who are two stubborn people, or the Sicilian settings, I am completely hooked. In truth, I can't wait for chapter 3. Also, please tag me in all your Peaky works, please.

Heart, Body and Soul || Tommy Shelby x OC

PART II

Summary: Nina has a chat with Tommy, and she doesn’t hesitate to make some things clear. As they get to know each other more, they learn one thing: neither of them wants to let the other win.

Warnings: mentions of arranged marriage, slow-burn, small age-gap (Tommy’s 30, Nina is in her early 20s), time-typical misogyny, English is not my first language.

A/N: This is set somewhere between season 1 and 2. Feedback is always appreciated🤍 Read part I HERE

SERIES MASTERLIST

SERIES MOODBOARD

Gif credit

Dividers credit

Tommy followed Nina’s quick steps down the hallway of her big house, his mind still racing from the past events. He still had to come to terms with the fact that he was in Sicily, he was alive, and the deal was not some trap set in order to get rid of him.

Nina stopped in front of a door, turning to look at him for the first time since she had started walking. She tucked a loose strand of her long hair behind her ear, finally resting her gaze upon him.

“This is your room.” She said, opening the door. “It has a private bathroom. If you need more towels or stuff like that, you can take them from the cabinet at the end of the hallway. Make yourself at home.”

Her flat tone, in high contrast with her polite words, made it plain that she had been told to be civil, and that she didn’t really care about him feeling comfortable. Tommy figured that the grudge she apparently held against him was probably due to the fact that, just like he didn’t trust those people, she didn’t trust him.

Nina’s dark eyes shifted to stare at something right above his head, and it didn’t take him long to realise she was looking at the razors sewn in his cap. He waited for her bold facade to crumble, to read the unmistakable signs of fear appear on her face. However, defying all his expectations, the glimpse shining in her eyes was not one of fear, rather one of curiosity.

“The Peaky Blinders…” she murmured, more to herself than to him, with the tone of someone who was suddenly aware of something. Then she blinked, seemingly recollecting herself. “I just wondered why you called yourselves like that.” She explained.

“Now you know.” He said, with a nod of his head.

Silence fell between them as they stood face to face, studying each other, all while keeping their distance. There was a fiery stubbornness in her eyes, but it wasn’t intentional, or a mere way of presenting herself to the world. It was rooted in her very nature. That restless gaze was something that Tommy knew all too well.

“Anyway, you won’t need it.” Nina suddenly spoke, nodding towards his cap. “Just like you won’t need the gun you’re hiding inside your coat. Don’t bring them to the lunch.”

Tommy squinted his eyes, opening his mouth to say something, but no sound came out of it as words failed him. How the hell would she know what he was hiding in his coat?

She shot him one last glance before walking past him, without giving him the chance to speak. Only when she reached the middle of the hallway, she spoke again, slightly raising her voice. “Lunch will be served in an hour. Don’t be late.”

“He’s not an old man.”

Nina went straight to the point as she stormed inside her cousin’s bedroom, eager to ease at least one of her worries. After her conversation with Tommy, she had hastily left her house, crossed the shared garden, and rushed inside Agnese’s house for an update session.

“Good.” Agnese said, taking one last look in the mirror before turning to face her cousin, who had proceeded to sit on her bed. “How does he look?” She asked, some sort of trepidation in her eyes.

Not like a Devil, Nina thought to herself. She had heard stories about him, about how everybody called him “The Peaky Blinder Devil”. She had pictured him like an unpleasant man - nasty, even -, rough and surly. Instead, he couldn’t have been any different. She had to admit that he was, in fact, quite attractive. And his manners were fairly good.

“He’s… nice.” She hesitated, the word feeling like a burning lump she had to swallow. “He has blue yes.”

Agnese stared at her with a puzzled look in her eyes, probably expecting something more articulate. But as much as she tried, Nina couldn’t find the words to describe the man she had just met. For some reason, they just wouldn’t come out.

“Don’t worry, you won’t be a Teresa.” Nina broke the silence with a joke, making her cousin chuckle.

“Well, that’s a relief.”

Teresa was a girl they used to play with when they were children, a sweet girl, unfortunately born in a poor family. She was married off as soon as she turned eighteen. The man was twice her age, smelled foul and missed a front tooth.

Being a Teresa was not that uncommon.

“Anyway, it’s not like he’s betrothed to me. They just suggested him to marry me.” She remarked, grabbing a hairbrush and turning towards the mirror again. “He might not choose me.”

Nina raised her eyebrows as she looked at her cousin in disbelief. “Are you serious?” She asked, slightly raising her voice. “You’re the most beautiful girl in the village, everybody says. And you’re gentle, and good.”

Agnese shook her head, slowly brushing her brown hair. “My sisters are beautiful as well. And so are our cousins both from your mother and my mother’s side.”

“Yes, but your sisters are not even twenty yet. And our cousins don’t know a single English word.” She pointed out. “Who else would he choose, me?”

A genuine laugh escaped from Agnese’s lips at her cousin’s sarcastic remark. Everybody knew Nina wasn’t exactly marriage material, with her smart mouth and unusual ideas. Silence fell between them as Agnese struggled to tie the front parts of her hair behind her head with a ribbon. Nina got up from the bed and walked up to her. She took the ribbon from her hand and started to style her hair. “Don’t be worried, Agnese. I’m sure he’ll only have eyes for you.” She said softly, giving her a supportive smile through the mirror.

When she finished, Nina sat back on the bed, suddenly becoming serious. She fidgeted with the hem of a blanket, trying to voice her thoughts without sounding negative. “Is this what you want, though?”

Agnese glanced at her with furrowed eyebrows. “Why wouldn’t it be?” She asked, pure wonder in her voice. “I’ve always known I’d have to get married.”

Nina sighed, slightly shaking her head. Sometimes she felt like her thoughts were something that could be understood by her and only her. She had no one to share them with, no one who would genuinely listen. And even though her cousin was the only one who didn’t look at her as if she was some lost cause, Nina knew that, deep down, she thought what everybody else did. That one day, Nina would have to stop with her nonsense and get married.

“Yes, but doesn’t it bother you?” Nina asked, her dark eyes full of obstinacy. “They don’t involve us in the business, but they use us as some sort of bargaining chip when it suits them.” She spat out.

“The business is men’s business, Nina.” Agnese said with a soft voice, trying to reason with her. “We help the only way we can.”

“But what do we get from it?” She insisted.

“Security, stability. Someone who provides for us. That’s how things are. It’s not like we have any other choice.”

Nina scoffed, putting an end to the conversation. It was an important day for her cousin, and she didn’t want to ruin it for her. But as much as she tried to support her, she couldn’t understand how she could just accept that. In moments like those, their difference emerged in all its magnitude.

And she was well aware they really couldn’t be any more different. Not just in the way they thought, but in the very depths of their being. That difference was right before everyone’s eyes. She had been compared to Agnese all her life, to her beauty, to her softness. There was nothing soft about Nina. She was all sharp edges and searing looks. Where Agnese wore a smile bright enough to put the sun to shame, Nina wore a scowl. Where Agnese’s words, sweet like honey, meant to soothe, Nina’s words meant to cut. She was outspoken, and defensive, and angry. Angry at her family, whose judgmental stare burned on her skin. Angry at her mother, who had wanted her different since the moment she had drawn her first breath. Angry at her father, who still treated her like a little girl who knew nothing of the word. Angry at Tommy Shelby, who thought he could just barge in and state some claim over one of them.

Standing up, Nina shot her cousin one last look before walking towards the door. “I’ll wait for you in the garden.”

Not even half an our after Tommy Shelby’s arrival, the garden was already full of nosy relatives, half of whom didn’t even have a part in the business. The news of there being a gangster had roused the interest of ambitious mothers and their giddy daughters.

“Is it always like this?”

Tommy’s voice came to Nina’s as he walked up to her, stopping by her side. She was quite pleased to see that he had listened to her and taken off his cap, along with his coat and his jacket. No gun nor razors in sight.

“No, thank God.” She shook her head. “Usually, we only gather on Sunday. But now you’re here, and everybody’s curious.” She explained, her Italian accent coming through with all those r’s. “Those people there,” she pointed towards a group of people talking next to the table, “they’re from my mother’s side. And those ones-” she indicated another set of relatives, “they’re from Aunt Rita’s side, Agnese’s mother. I’d tell you to introduce yourself, but they don’t speak English.”

Tommy nodded to himself, trying to keep all that information in mind. “Are they part of the business, too?”

“No. The business is only run by my father’s side of the family. By they do benefit from it.”

A part of him was glad that he didn’t have to remember all of those people, or to interact with them. His main concern were the Ferrante brothers - or rather, two of them, since Antonio had stayed in England -, their wives and their sons and daughters.

“For the next few days this is how it’s gonna be.” Nina spoke again, a hint of annoyance in her voice as she looked around. “Once you make it clear who it is that you want to marry, the whole thing will die out. I hope.”

“Your uncle Mario has three daughters, right?” Tommy asked, trying to put together what he had learned about the family. He was pretty sure he remembered all of the important things, but a recapitulation wouldn’t hurt.

“Yes.” She confirmed. “Agnese, Rosa and Sofia.”

“And you only have brothers.” He said, taking his cigarette case out of his pocket. He opened it and offered Nina a cigarette, but she politely declined.

“No, thank you. Two older brothers.”

He rubbed the cigarette against his lower lip before lighting it. He took a long drag, relishing the calming feeling of the smoke filling his lungs. All that situation was nerve-racking, way more than he had imagined. They could’ve simply arranged a marriage with Agnese and get on with it, but no, they had to do things the right way. See if they got along, see if there could be a better match. But it just looked like some kind of sale.

“So it would be convenient to marry one of you four.” He noted, speaking more to himself than to her. “Because all of your other cousins and their family are not directly involved in the business. And they don’t speak English.”

“One of them.” She corrected him, crossing her arms over her chest.

Tommy blinked, feeling like he had missed some part of the conversation. “What?”

“You’re here to marry one of them.” Nina clarified, emphasising the last word. “I took myself out of the list.”

He exhaled a cloud of smoke, trying to hide the amused grin that threatened to appear on his face. Although he barely knew that girl, the thing didn’t surprise him in the slightest. “Could you do that?”

“Who cares?” She shrugged, raising her eyebrows. “It’s not like you could force me anyway.”

There was something entertaining in those quick answers, in the way she didn’t hesitate to make things clear. He had the impression that she had been constantly challenging him since the moment they had met, and it was something completely different from what he was used to. He wasn’t even sure she was doing it on purpose, it seemed to be just her way of being. “No, I couldn’t.” He agreed, flicking the ash to the ground. “And I wouldn’t. But if I were to choose you, and you were to say no, and I were to consider all of your cousins as unsuitable, I could decide to go on with the war. Would you take that responsibility upon yourself?” He provoked her, squinting his eyes.

Of course, Tommy would’ve never done something like that. It wasn’t in his interest to find a wife that was “suitable”, he only wanted to put an end to that war. But the girl in front of him seemed clever and quick-witted, and he was curious to see how long she would manage to hold her own.

“As I come to understand, this peace is more necessary to you than it is to us.” Nina started. “You were the ones who have been hit the hardest. You lost two pubs and a warehouse, right? And a few men.” She added, and it sounded more like a statement than a question. She cast him a sly glance, her brown iris glinting with smugness when she noticed the muscles clenching in his jaw. “You won’t go on with the war, it would be suicide.”

Tommy raised eyebrows with a nod, finding himself in the position of acknowledging that she, in fact, had a point. “I thought you weren’t involved in the business.” He said, before taking another drag from his cigarette. He knew the Italians were more old-fashioned in that sense. The men didn’t trouble their wives, sisters and daughters with the matters of business, not only because said business was dangerous, but mainly because there was a hierarchy to respect.

“I’m not.” She shook her head. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t know things.” She added cryptically.

Tommy had to give it to her, she was smart. However, there was a small detail she was forgetting, and he was determined to have the last word. “The thing is,” he drew on his cigarette again, taking his sweet time before going on. “If your family didn’t need me, I wouldn’t be here.”

He turned to look at Nina, staying quiet for a few seconds to test her reaction. She kept her gaze on a spot in front of her, waiting for him to go on, and from the expression on her face Tommy knew he had a chance of winning that conversation. “You can’t defeat Sabini without my help. You know he’s working with the Solomons, now?”

That was it. With a certain satisfaction, Tommy realised that she had no idea of what he was talking about. Maybe she didn’t know everything, after all. “You don’t even know who Solomons is, do you?” He rubbed it in with a taunting tone, stomping out his cigarette.

Before she could have the chance to answer, a voice called from behind them.

“Mr Shelby.”

Vincenzo Ferrante approached him, followed by a man and a young woman. “Meet my brother, Mario, and his daughter, Agnese.”

Tommy shook Mario’s hand before shifting his attention to the girl. They were right, she was a beauty. Her brown hair fell down to her shoulders, framing her sweet face. The pink, floral dress she was wearing flowed around the soft curves of her body, gracefully brushing against her rounded hips. Her doe eyes looked at him with shyness, and for a moment she seemed almost intimidated. But then, her full lips curved in a gentle smile, and her cheeks turned a vivid shade of pink as she held out her hand to him.

“Pleasure.” He shook it delicately, offering her a kind smile.

Agnese then turned to Nina, giving her a warm hug, but it was clear that it was just an excuse to whisper something in her ear. Nina shook her head, saying something in a fake scolding tone, making her cousin laugh.

“Come, Mr Shelby,” Vincenzo spoke again, drawing Tommy’s attention back to him. “I’ll introduce you to my wife.”

Against Tommy’s expectations, the lunch ran smoothly. He was introduced to Nina’s mother, Maria, and Agnese’s mother, Rita, although he didn’t speak much with them because of their lack of English. He engaged in conversation with Nina’s older brothers, Salvatore and Pietro, who were starting to take part in the Italian side of the business, and he met Agnese’s sisters. Sitting across from Nina, he noticed how she only spoke with Agnese, while her interactions with her aunts - the ones from her mother’s side of the family - were brief and characterised by some kind of tension. Her numerous cousins, for their part, seemed to barely acknowledge her existence. Tommy couldn’t help but steal a glance at her from time to time. For all she tried to put on a serene face, her rigid posture gave away how uncomfortable she actually was. Perhaps this time he had stared at her for a bit too long, because she raised her gaze from her plate to look at him. Their eyes met for a second, but Tommy was quick to look away, nodding at something that Mario Ferrante had said to him.

The lunch lasted until the early afternoon. After the majority of the relatives who had joined it had left - except for some of the aunts - Maria and Rita called their daughters to help cleaning everything up. Tommy remained sat at the table with Vincenzo, his two sons and Mario, all of them ready to settle the terms of the peace once and for all. Tommy’s headache, which had been plaguing him since the moment he had left Small Heath, was finally starting to subside. Now he would declare his intention to start courting Agnese, as they had suggested, and hopefully in a few weeks he’d be married and with one less enemy. Too much time had already been wasted, and getting to know the other girls would’ve slowed everything down even more. He wasn’t there to find the perfect match, he was there to save his family and his business. Agnese would do.

“So one of yours might get married soon, eh, Mario?” Vincenzo teased his brother, grabbing a bottle full of some bright yellow liquid that his wife had brought, before pouring it five small glasses. “Limoncello.” He said, handing one to Tommy.

“Who says? Maybe it’s your Nina that will get married.” Mario playfully retorted, winking at him with the glass in his hand.

Vincenzo chuckled, as if his brother had said the most amusing thing in the world. “You know my Nina’s not ready for marriage. Let’s leave her alone for a couple more years.” Having said that, he shot Tommy a look. It was a silent warning, my daughter is not up for sale.

Tommy cleared his throat, straightening his back. Maybe it was a bit too soon to declare his intention. As much as he wanted to get it over with, he didn’t want to seem hasty. Because, again, those people wanted to do things the right way.

Waiting two or three days wouldn’t hurt.

“Look at them, sitting at the table like fucking kings.” Nina murmured, looking out the window as she scrubbed a plate. “God forbid they raise a finger.”

Luckily for her, neither her mother nor her aunts could understand what she was saying, and her cousins were too busy talking amongst themselves to listen to her. She was in no mood for a scolding. She kept on cleaning, getting lost in her own thoughts. That day had been draining, and it wasn’t even over yet. It was always like that, every time that the family gathered. Feeling judged and looked upon for everything she said or did was tiring. It didn’t matter how much she tried to be good, there was always someone ready to point their finger behind fake curiosity and nasty smiles.

And now they were speaking loudly, talking about how beautiful Agnese was, about how Mr Shelby surely was already in love with her. Nina pretended not to see how they tended to look at her while making their comments. It was an implicit comparison, she knew. And she knew she was right when the comparison became explicit. Aunt Clara, one of her mother’s sisters, said only half jokingly that Nina would find a husband as well one day, if she decided to get rid of that frown and put some meat on those bones.

For once, Nina bit her tongue and kept on scrubbing the plate, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of a retort. Her mother, however, blushed and cleared her throat, almost embarrassed by the situation. Nina knew that her opinion about her was not that different from her aunts’, and that her behaviour was indefensible even for her mother.

Maria poured the coffee she had just prepared in five small cups that she had placed in a tray, then asked her daughter to bring it to the men. Nina sighed and grabbed the tray. At least she could leave that kitchen now.

She went out into the garden and walked to the table, that was now full of cigarette holders, matches, bottles and small glasses. She squeezed between their chairs, trying to find an empty spot big enough to place the tray. No one seemed to notice as she struggled make space with one hand, while with the other she balanced the tray, trying her best not to spill the coffee. A wave of irritation spread from her stomach, slowly rising to her chest and shoulders, all the way to her head, and soon she was gritting her teeth, her patience rapidly running out. Just when she was about to snap, two strong hands grabbed the tray, guiding it towards the space she had just cleared. Tommy’s blue irises pierced through her, and for a moment all her anger left her. There was something calming, in that particular shade of blue. She cast him a grateful glance, not only for his help, but mainly for preventing her from throwing a fit.

“Oh, no, no, please, sit, Mr. Shelby.” Her brother Pietro said, waving his hand. Nina raised her eyebrows, fighting the urge to slap him on the back of his head.

Tommy squinted his eyes and for a moment it seemed like he was about to say something. Then his gaze rested upon Nina again, and he nodded at her. “Thank you for the coffee.” He said, sitting back in his chair.

She took a few steps back, looking at him one last time before starting to walk away. Before she could go far, Pietro’s voice came to her ears again.

“Hand me the ashtray.”

Nina stopped in her tracks, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. She gathered all her strength to remain calm, and turned around to look at him “You have hands.” She simply said, before going back to the house.

It would be a long day, indeed.

Heart, Body and Soul tag list: @zablife @queenofshinigamis @raincoffeeandfandoms @call-sign-shark @kmc1989 @babayaga67 @kmhappybunny240

Regular tag list: @iamngoclinh08 @lilywinchesterlove @fandom-puff @capitanostella @caelys @lucillethings @peakyxtommy @queenofkings1212 @lyarr24 @kmc1989

Tommy Shelby tag list: @50svibes

[chimepunk]

endless list of favorite fics: been together since way back when (95k) by @alivingfire

Louis Tomlinson is a law student with a simple but effective four step plan: 1. Finish law school. 2. Get hired somewhere awesome. 3. Marry his best friend and boyfriend of two years, Harry. 4. Live happily ever after. 

Harry Styles doesn't know what he wants to do with his life, where he wants to go, who he wants to be, or if he even wants the college degree he's almost completed. All he does know is who he’ll be with forever, as long as Louis wants to keep him around. 

Or: the painfully realistic college au where everyone's poor, lovesick, tired of school, terrified of the future, and still having the greatest times of their lives. (x) 

[softer-ua]

I have a confession; i am weak, i wouldn't handle fanfics, where the ride doesn't have ice cream afterwards, but. Any fanfic, that has a detailed experience of Midoriya being a supposed number 1. Where a life like this, is incredibly lonely, and just miserable, full of fear. What you think of those?

I think they’re really good and a painfully realistic outcome, it’s lonely at the top. It’s why Katsuki is such a vital piece to Deku

Deku doesn’t seek attention, never has. Even when they’re little every flash back is of Deku kind of in the background and Katsuki drawing Deku into the fold(predominantly by being a dick)

Deku other than getting kinda spacy shows almost zero outward signs of distress for others to pick up on, he’s always polite and kind, and a socially crafty sob

Do you know how many conversations about him he’s given short positive responses to and then turned it around to ask about the other person in such away that the other person goes off to talk about themselves forever.

Deku is so self sacrificing and uncomfortable taking up space that while be a positive upbeat person it would take damn near forever to register the pro hero version of him was burning out.

—

I’m weak too, I absolutely can’t read any fanfics tagged “no happy ending” , don’t even wanna read the description in case it makes me cry 😢

Seriously I read

I Don’t Love You Except Because I Love You by Seeress

Like a year ago and I think about all the time, there’s scene where Katsuki imagines Dekus future house warming party and it lives rent free in my head like I lose sleep getting mega sad about it.

It’s not like a heavy angsty fic, it’s just a mundane all too real kind of heartbreak that I apparently am not equipped to handle

I’d probably have had any easier time if one of them just died instead of this 😭💔

It’s super well written tho and one of my favorites