#the closest i've come
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the real reason gale proposes so quickly
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#galemance#gale dekarios#tav#morgueweave#until then they are Courting#this is the closest cyra is capable of getting to a joke#she's a woman who knows what she wants and it's to fuck that wizard forever#i need a name for them so i can tag them properly but i can't come up with one. can't use 'blood' bc that's stepping on bloodweave#idk why but gale's camp clothes are so endearing to me#his little velvet pyjamas with the embroidery. comfiest man in the camp#at cons i've met 2 separate gales in pyjamas with a nightcap and a lamp and they GET IT
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I ordered an ice cream cone at McDonald's and when I got to the window, the manager moved the window person aside and held up.... This. She says, "You ordered a cone, but this is all we have for you, because our machine just got working again. Do you still want it?"
Of COURSE I want it. Look at it. It's got anxiety. Me too, buddy. It's perfect. Basically a milkshake but with a cone. I'm going to immortalize it on Tumblr immediately.
#ice cream#food#stories about ked's life#I've never been to a McDonald's where the ice cream machine didn't work at all#i didn't even know that was a thing until a few years ago#they have ALWAYS worked for me#this is the closest I've come to an unworking machine-#one that scrambled to get it together when it realized i was on the way#and i love that about the universe
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remember my name - mitski
#art#my art#chonny jash#cccc#cccc mind#not described#tumblr murdered the quality in cold blood jesus christ#regardless. your periodic reminder that while i soulpost often i do have a lot of thoughts about all three of them#also fun fact i actually do not remember where i got the association of these lyrics with mind from#i just have an image of an early draft for this thing's composition Seared Into My Brain#and the vague memory of thinking it was genius in the moment#(probably while i was still in bed; either late at night or early in the morning)#so. this is perhaps the closest drawing i've ever made to having genuinely come to me in a dream#i doubt i'd come up with it awake but! well once it was in my brain i had to draw it. obviously.
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Day 147
#I think this is the closest I've come to missing a day#daily tf2 medic#tf2#team fortress 2#medic tf2#tf2 medic#tf2 fanart#i have no mouth and i must scream
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silent skies
#art#ffxiv#xau#final fantasy xiv#lineart#sketch#endwalker#i consider myself agnostic but through venat and hydaelyn and how i view xau's bond with who she considered her heavenly mother#are the closest i've come to understanding how religion might move people#to lose and kill your god out of necessity might break you yes?#the idea of losing the POSSIBILITY for comfort or to be heard is very bleak if you thought it was there in the first place#i hate video games because they force me to think
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there is that adorable pic of a 13 year old pecco and marc, hugging him by the shoulders. pecco hadn’t become a rossi protege yet, marc recently won his title in 125, they are both so so young. like, of course pecco is going to think a senior (albeit as famous as marc was at the time) is cool and worthy of “celebrity” picture! of course marc is going to take photos with kids that ask him to!
and then they meet at the rossi ranch years later, pecco after an abysmal rookie moto3 season, but part of vr46 academy, marc as a multiple world champion in different categories. like, i’m sure they’ve crossed paths in the paddock, but it looks like the ranch was their first outside of work get-together?
i do wonder at what point did pecco stop seeing marc as this admirable motogp giant? they are co-workers/competitors now, supposedly equals. does the childish wonderment and idealization ever go away, when you are put head-to-head? yes, pecco has said that he doesn’t consider himself on marc’s level, but it does really answer the question, when marc achieves something awesome, like a fucking pole on a honda, does it fill pecco only with the sense of falling short, jealousy, frustration, or is there that tiny 13 year old pecco somewhere inside going “wow, this guy is awesome”
anon... first of all this ask is right up my street. second of all, yeah no the thirteen year old never entirely went away
to some extent obviously all riders kinda do this when they end up competing with the guys they grew up admiring. (or well in modern motogp, that's how it worked out - the competitive windows do have to be big enough, yeah? I'm not sure about the nineties premier class riders, but starting from valentino who had the biaggi poster, was a capirossi fan, an norick fan... but then also didn't get to compete directly with doohan for instance and was instead just mentored by him. valentino sticking around for so long basically Breaks this.) like I was talking in this ask about the dani/marc relationship and how when we talk about dani being marc's 'reference', it does mean something slightly different than the valentino hero idealisation. basically, it's the question of whether you think you're gonna fight that guy one day, if all goes well... because if you're little pecco, right, you're looking up to marc and want to be him, but you also want to beat him (if little pecco is feeling very brave). so marc fills the role of 'reference', the bloke who is basically always a few steps ahead of pecco - exaggerated by how precocious marc was. the role of 'hero' is of course again filled by valentino, though in this case pecco didn't actually have to meaningfully compete against his idol. the separation is a bit cleaner
and look, I doubt this ever really went as far as marc's admiration for dani. but yeah as you say: at the end of the day it's this cool superstar who is tearing up the lower categories and then is tearing up the premier class... like that's this prodigy... and then you get to be part of your actual hero's academy AND you're there when the prodigy gets invited to your hero's home!! not only is marc cool, not only is he winning everything, but also valentino clearly thinks he's fantastic... you kinda want valentino to think you are fantastic in the same way he talks about marc and looks at him... and pecco is like. seventeen at this point. great age. super impressionable. he's having a marginally better season than his absolute flop moto3 campaign but it's still!! rough! you know, so far away from this world that valentino and marc inhabit. obviously young athletes dream, obviously they have to be a bit delusional, obviously they have to believe they'll make it, but those are the kinds of harrowing years that really dent your actual belief. like god, the world of valentino and marc must have felt kinda unattainable back then...
anyway, obviously a year later marc became public enemy number one. personally, if I had to guess, I don't really think valentino has ever spoken much to his proteges about the details of the marc feud. it's the kind of thing where you maybe occasionally badmouth a guy you all hate when the kids are in the room, some dismissive comment or some slightly ugly sideswipe... but valentino did probably prefer to keep his mentees out of the whole thing and isn't giving them particularly detailed hot takes on sepang 2015. I mean, look at what luca said last year
hey, he could be lying, but is he really the type? "I'm sure he's still angry" - even that doesn't sound like he knows anything particularly specific about where his brother's at these days. if valentino hasn't spoken much about sepang 2015 with his own flesh and blood, then is he really giving long debriefs to marco bezzecchi? are you sure? of course, unlike luca, pecco does have the dubious distinction of actually being at sepang 2015, so there's always the chance he was in the room when some nasty things were being said about marc... but my sense is that all the academy riders have kind of been left to their own devices when making up their minds about the marc/valentino relationship. just probably a bit of a no-go topic on most days. and while pecco may have initially been completely on board with the marc hate, over the years his stance has mellowed to the brave and bold position of 'actually, I have other stuff to worry about'. like, this is why you don't get this weird bez-style all-over-the-place behaviour from pecco - fundamentally, he is far too sensible and far too interested in his own career to be going around seeking revenge on the behalf of his mentor. it's not like valentino really seems to expect him to either. sometimes the best thing you can do is simply try not to care that much
soooooo fundamentally you get to this place where for quite a few years, pecco really isn't thinking about marc too often I reckon... it's very much background noise - even when he's gotten to motogp, he's obviously not exactly fighting with marc from the word go. he has other stuff to worry about! then marc is gone for a bit! 2021 is kinda weird because pecco never really felt in that championship fight (I mean, maybe he thought he was idk) because he only really got going late in the season, and marc definitely wasn't in that title fight... BUT pecco got his first ever motogp win as a result of a proper great defensive ride against marc at aragon! seven overtakes and re-overtakes in the last few laps! truly some proper smart riding, anticipating where marc was going to attack and figuring out how to get him back every time. and of course, that's like... got to be one of the coolest ways possible you can get your first win? beating one of the all time greats (even if a physically impaired one) in a direct extensive duel? genuinely looking at the current grid, I'd struggle to come up with a cooler maiden win... oh I suppose zarco last year would actually be a decent shout. one of those two imo! anyway what an ego boost that must be
typed out the response to this ask on wednesday and let it *vaguely gestures* simmer a bit, but actually thursday they had pecco on that motogp podcast thingy and talked him through basically his whole career. which is one of those cases of 'not necessarily anything new, but always interesting to hear how the bloke himself puts it', and anyway it does also cover a lot of the stuff referenced in this post, would recommend. I did want to quickly bring it up because pecco does talk about aragon 2021 in that (at around 23 mins in):
Q: And the amount of pressure, for everyone who doesn't remember - it was Aragon '21, vs Marc Marquez, anti-clockwise track, everyone's expecting a certain person to win. [...] Seven times, he passes you in the last three laps, and every time you have to find something, for your first win - A: Not bad, yeah? Q: How was that feeling crossing the line, because it's your first win but it's also the last three laps of craziness that you've come through? A: Yeah, I remember that... we were prepared to fight for this victory because we work at it a lot and we were finally prepared and as soon as started the weekend I was feeling great. Marc was very strong, Fabio was very strong also... We started to race and I did the pole position and then we started to race and Marc was like always super super fast in Aragon because it's a left hander track, he's very strong in Aragon, it's his home grand prix, so... I was trying the maximum and I was there fighting with him and for me was fantastic because I was very strong in a very complicated track for me. The first - was not the first possibility to win but was one of the first and we were fighting with the maximum with the top [player?] so defeating him in Aragon was fantastic and I never could have asked more for my first victory for sure. Because some win their first victory with gap or with some luck, we fight. [...] Yeah, was fantastic.
like I said. it's a really cool win! pecco knows it's a cool win! he knows it's a cool win because it's marc! even two premier class title pecco still feels deeply aware of how special that was
*reaches up to scratch at ear in slightly self-conscious manner when saying "not bad" about beating the eight times world champion*
because it does mean something extra to beat marc, right? and that's also what this represents to pecco, as an opportunity... obviously on balance he'd very much want marc to not be in his team, because he's not an idiot and he's aware it's going to be a bit of a nightmare. that being said! of course, would there be anything cooler than for him than actually beating marc in the same team... I don't want to sound like a broken record on this topic but just to reiterate, none of the titles won post-2019 are in any way diminished by marc's absence - and fundamentally pecco must know he's a deserving champion, even if he still considers himself on a different level from valentino and marc. but of course it would mean something special to beat him! it's already meant something special to beat him in individual races! it'd mean something special if he beats him this year, older bike be damned! and it'd mean something special next year. pecco is deeply wary of marc, and rightly so, but don't take that to mean he isn't up for the fight. he always has been
weirdly enough, I do actually think being valentino's protege might help him be sensible about marc. because the thing is pecco has clearly put some thought into all of this at some point and had to decide for himself... or well, to make peace with the fact that he is not going to be the next valentino rossi - and that he doesn't really want to be. it's kinda the casey versus jorge distinction: you can be a valentino fan and admire everything he's done on-track but still very much know that valentino the persona isn't something you really want to attempt to emulate because it just isn't you, or you can hunger after attaining that kind of 'character' and popularity for yourself and find yourself disillusioned when things turn out differently. pecco's in the casey camp, minus the desire to shove valentino off the nearest cliff edge. like he says:
man wants a quiet life when he's not doing the death sport. and, y'know, marc might not have quite those stratospheric levels of popularity as valentino does... but it's fairly obvious pecco links them in his mind, which is not just about talent. they're both Characters, they're both figureheads in the sport, they're both larger than life. and maybe sometimes, deep down, someone like pecco might wish that kind of thing did come naturally to him... but if he has felt that way, then he's already kinda had to work through all that. he's valentino's successor! he's the next big italian motogp star! but he's never going to be valentino. and he wouldn't want that life, it wouldn't make him happy - and probably he looks at marc with all his drama and controversy and thinks he wouldn't really want all that either. pecco's given all of this a lot of thought, and he's still probably a bit too self-conscious and a bit too aware of all of this stuff for his own good, but that does also mean he knows his own head and where he's at when it comes to his own status in the sport. both when it comes to the character and when it comes to the talent. sure, having marc's fuck you talent would be nice, everyone would want that... but also if you're a two time premier champion, at a certain point you need a certain cockiness about your own abilities. he's spoken about how he needs a more well-settled bike than casey or marc, how he can't out-perform the bike like they can - there clearly is a lot of admiration there, still the sense of respect and awe you probably can't ever quite shake. pecco won't ever be one of those aliens. but he's had enough time to establish himself in the sport before he's had to deal with the marc threat in a more active way, has had the chance to find his place without worrying too much about marc - has been able to build up his own confidence. at the same time, pecco is still very obviously aware of just who marc is and the weight of that legacy and it shapes how he approaches fighting marc. it's pecco's admiration vying with his arrogance - and he has to hope the latter wins out. you can't be fearful of the legacy of those you're trying to beat. you have to kill your heroes, even if it's a strange flavour of hero
anyhow - one big way in which valentino does loom large here is that everyone else is aware of his rivalry with marc and how it is crucial Historical Context for the pecco/marc stuff. because pecco does have that dog in him, he's fundamentally disinterested in fighting his idol's battles and is mainly just looking out for himself. a big part of the general wariness towards marc isn't even valentino-related antipathy or just respect for his abilities, but also this kind of sense of... god, this marc thing is always going to have extra implications, will there be discourse, can there please not be discourse... he doesn't want to get into this stuff, he doesn't want to be part of the sepang 2015 reenactment society. he's pretty determined to stay clear of marc-related controversy at every turn, and generally does do a good job of not letting the undoubtedly extremely annoying marc annoy him... the only time pecco had proper marc-induced head loss was mugello last year - y'know, that whole thing when he felt impeded by marc and then slowed down long enough to give marc the chance to warm up his tyres and catch a pecco tow to the front row. like that was just head gone, the kind of thing that happens when you already find someone deeply annoying and then you kinda choose the wrong moment to get mad at them. with a bit of distance pecco may well have regretted reacting that way, like you don't really want to give marc that kind of opening. he's been way more disciplined since then, but it still opened the door
fundamentally, the less time pecco spends obsessing over marc, the better for him. pecco obviously has to be very aware of marc and wary of him, but he also can't spent too much energy on admiring him or being irritated by him or anything else. (given that valentino's descriptions of the marc/pecco rivalry do seem to frame marc as a competitor who sounds an awful lot like valentino himself, ironically valentino is quite well-placed to offer the 'try to avoid letting the guy who gets off on annoying his rivals annoy you' advice.) it's always going to be tough, isn't it, competing against your heroes, figuring out how to disentangle those past emotions from how you actually approach fighting them, how to feel comfortable enough in your own skin to not be cowed by that status... you can't get to a place where you're so admiring or respectful or intimidated that you're already beaten before the competition even starts - and to his credit pecco has shown he is both willing to stand up to the famous marc marquez as well as capable of doing so. my guess is that for him, the childhood idolisation isn't primarily expressed in a 'wow he dragged the honda to pole!!' (not least when he was using pecco's teammate to directly deny pecco). sure, perhaps you do get those knee jerk reactions of admiring the sheer craft of your rival's riding, just have to do your best not to let it affect you. but for the most part it's... really wanting to beat marc. and sometimes feeling a teensy bit insecure about just how good marc is. and really wanting to beat him. he kinda has to be sensible and talk down in his brain how special this one guy is so he doesn't do anything silly, tell himself it's just any other guy... but it's still always going to be there, hovering in the background. and god does pecco really want to beat him
#pecco very much 'girl who is “going to be okay”'-ing his way into the marc teammate relationship#y'know pecco said somewhere that one of his hobbies is reading sports autobiographies#and I would love comparing notes with him on casey's. like surely it's fairly likely he's read it right?#the pecco/casey axiom is great. he does sometimes come out with stuff where I'm like. wow that's so casey-coded#when he said at assen that he really liked how the crowd was less partisan than at montmelo and mugello?? casey's daughter right there#inherited casey's surliness and valentino's inability to be fast on a friday. truly their best traits#in some ways this is the closest we'll ever get to seeing casey/marc at honda but they'd shoot u in the streets if u said that out loud#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#actually i've had the casey autobiography thought a lot but come to think of it i'd also love to chat to him about valentino's#maybe he's read agassi's!! that's got to be one of the most famous ones surely#pecco buddy would you be interested in a book club#current tag
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Fanart for the manga that had me stunned for an entire day.
"The Summer You Were There" is the name of the manga.
#the summer you were there#kimi to tsuzuru utakata#fanart#artists on tumblr#my art#digital art#art#sketch#bromaster3000#yuri#yuri manga#I am emotionally devastated#I'm not the kind of person to cry#but this is the closest I've come to crying#read this manga#It's so good
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Ashton Greymoore we need to work on your charisma because there's only so many times I can mentally yell "KISS HER GODDAMMIT" at the screen
#critical role#cr 3 spoilers#cr 3#bells hells#ashton greymoore#fearne calloway#ashton x fearne#fearne x ashton#callowmoore#this is probably the closest I've had to the 1% chance of my mental scenarios coming true#I mean Ashton did not hesitate to save her or trust her in the challenge even at the threat of her being a doppelganger#also that's the closest to 'I don't believe in fate but I believe in you' I can get#and they gave her their ring to protect her!#didn't know they could literally GIVE THEIR HP TO HEAL HER too that was awesome#and Imogen knows she KNOWS I mean Laudna and FCG also know but Imogen is the one being soft about it#and now they feel whole and they feel whole with her#and their powers amplify near one another just as I hoped!#and they didn't say they didn't want to kiss her just that it was a lot of pressure#but still mate you gotta kiss her the only time you did you blew up you could've done it at the lava or the clock tower too#this was another perfect moment to kiss her#mentally yelling because I'm in the office squirming before work time zones are a bitch and the office would stare#will take that as a late birthday present thank you Tal and Ashley#my week has been made#let me yell into the ether some more#because I've been repeating 'it can still be a good day' from every inconvenience today because I knew this'd have me in a chokehold#and it is a GOOD DAY#taliesin jaffe#ashley johnson#I get being flustered Ash the beauty and your reason for living is giving your believed-unlovable ass the come hither eyes#but that's when you cast aside that belief commit and hither! Hither Ashton! Let yourself be loved by those who love you!
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I WAS HAVING SUCH A ROUGH DAY IN A SOMEWHAT ROUGH WEEK AND THEN MANAGED TO GET CHEAP HOZIER TICKETS FOR THIS WEDNESDAY??? THANK YOU UNIVERSE I NEEDED THIS
#I’m knocking on wood as I write this because you never know#But WOW#I've never seen him live!!!#The closest I’ve come to seeing a big concert live was seeing Suzie Izzard perform in her standup tour#She was RADIANT and I want to see her again#I’m literally so excited about this it’s been lowkey a rough time lately#Hozier
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No because really, what in the world is Jonathan driving as his next car?
#obviously it's the subway before he has children and gets a subaru#but like in the entertaining the idea of late 80s/early-mid90s Jonathan having his own car what the fuck is it#because like I'm thinking about it right and I've got nothing#the closest I've come to is a jeep cherokee#but that doesn't feel right#cause we HAVE to acknowledge that he drove one of the most iconic muscle cars of all time#which we then assume that's his style#(DO NOT THINK ABOUT THE LONNIE OF IT ALL)#but also his car was old when he got it#because poor#(pls do not make me consider the possibility it was Lonnie's and he inherited it i will cry)#(or worse it was a project for them that obviously never got done)#ANYWAYS#with this in mind one must assume the car would be from the early 80s at minimum#so#help#jonathan byers#stranger things
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quick silly little emunene sketch
They're having a movie night :3
#project sekai#emunene#pjsk#prsk#pjsk fanart#nene kusanagi#pjsk nene#emu otori#pjsk emu#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#the closest to drawing ruinene i've come is giving them matching nails#i think its a luttle funny#anyways#i love love wxs#did you guys know that i love wxs#i#i actually cant#i love them sm#drawing more seal rui as im writing this btw#im not okay#i am a little too obsessed#i go 1 day without drawing this silly little au and i feel weird#why#why did you do this to me
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I can't get over how well Skyjacks: Courier's Call manages to capture the feeling of really, really good children's literature. Listening to it seriously does make me feel like a bookish eleven year old all over again, all the sedimentary layers of my adult cynicism and ennui about the fantasy genre washed away for a moment to lay my heart as bare and excitable as it was back then haha.
This podcast also has what I think might be my favourite moment out of all podcasts of all time, full stop... and it's just a snowball fight with no real narrative stakes at all, only a dwelling on the joy and the characters in that particular moment. To this day, thinking about it feels like a big smile in my chest. (To be clear it's not like the show doesn't have powerful narrative stakes or High Drama overall! But I have rarely found a story so willing to and so skillfull at lingering in delight and discovery just for the sake of it. There's such an immense generosity in that which I think is an underappreciated aspect of storytelling, and that I am really grateful for.)
(If you've never heard of it before, I'm talking about the all-ages actual play podcast Skyjacks: Courier's Call, and you can check it out over here if you'd like! It also carries over and builds on a lot of really amazing worldbuilding from Campaign Skyjacks, part of which is a deeply queernorm approach, so that's another level on which people might connect with it. And if all of this weren't enough: absolute banger music at every turn, as with Skyjacks itself. Season 3 is just starting now, so it's a good time to get caught up!)
#skyjacks: courier's call#skyjacks courier's call#courier's call#trying to remember the tags I have used before challenge: impossible! let's just go with all of them lol#podcast rec#the prom arc followed by the ending of season 2... *chef's kiss* I was so happy I was so upset it really had it all#costume party. snowball fights. first dates. weird black audron kids. Friendship. dennison was there (making potentially bad life choices)#something for everyone I should think#the closest tone comparison I've come across is worlds beyond number probably for those who are fans of that!#it has the same 'let's just LIVE in this moment and universe for a while' generosity and I love both podcasts a lot
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he had his sweetie pie dial turned up into overdrive
#meursault dazai rlly is the closest i've come to understanding his hype. he's so hnfgrgdhf#bsd reread
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Me to my roommate: I might be depressed but at least my journal's coming tomorrow. Him: Oh yeah, you'll get to look at all the cum stains. Me: NOT WHAT HE DID.
#Hayley Speaks#FOR CONTEXT: I may have used a payment plan and some of my student loan refund money to order a fan-made version-#-of the blacklight Journal 3#It was from a legit and highly rated creator and they were super nice and transparent and made sure I knew it was fanmade before-#-shipping it out#It'll be the closest thing I get to owning the actual blacklight journal 3 and I think after the year I've had; I deserve a nice treat#Also not SUPER sure if it's coming tomorrow but I think it's sometime this week#ANYWAY SYLVAN THINKS HE'S FUNNY
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The dragon comic is so funny and cute!Part 2 with all the joint popping, gave me a good laugh.
You should name the characters, I’d like to know what to call the big guy and the human!
thank you!!! part 2 comes from personal experience of having absolute trash knees and elbows
I hadn't really thought about naming the dragon and knight, mostly because I don't think it's super relevant to the story. Also, choosing names is honestly too stressful for me lol. For now I think they'll remain unnamed
#closest I've come is nicknaming the dragon Grumpypants#it truly means so much to me that you like the characters enough to care about naming them#like for some reason that feels really meaningful
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straight up, jesus was a crossmaker is one of my favorite songs and it makes me SO crazy because it was about the songwriter, judee sill's ex and the chorus is like. he may be a horrible person but even jesus christ, this paragon, this pinnacle of goodness and holiness and innocence and light, crafted items that contributed to the pain and suffering of others, also not knowing that later, one would be used in killing him. even what's considered the absolute purest is not absolutely pure. and the line "i see the junction get nearer and danger is in the wind, and either road's looking grim" was her saying "well, i can give in to this despair and kill myself OR i can pour so much of my pain and sorrow and heart into this song. and i choose the second path even though it means i have to endure suffering." and i don't know how to elaborate anymore but. HE'S A BANDIT AND A HEARTBREAKER! BUT JESUS WAS A CROSSMAKER!
#everyone please listen to it please#honestly her whole self titled album is amazing#it's the closest i've ever come to a religious experience#judee sill#i think the crossmaking was a specific interpretation from a film but it hits me so hard#blinding me his song remains reminding me....
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