#the clans have just gotten used to seeing him appear to be talking to himself

[wicked-west-cats]

Shadowbelly is the soothsayer of Lakeclan. Often mistaken for being closer to the age of an elder, the seer has been drastically aged by his role in the clan.

Due to the constant deciphering and combing through of potential omens and prophecies, Shadowbelly has become more and more reserved as time goes on. He often appears to be looking through those around him as if they aren't even there. He's lost in his role and may as well have a paw in both the world of the living and the world of the dead.

His connection to the ancestors has been refined and nearly perfected over time. His visions are rarely wrong.

[heavenlyysstuff]

A Foreign Feeling. 2

NETEYAM.s x fem! metkayina! reader

summary . after yesterdays events, you and Neteyam set off on a search for shells beyond the reef. You stay out a little longer than intended.

a/n . again, you don’t have to listen to the song I linked, I simply just like to put songs that I think fit the story’s vibe into the fic. thanks for all the support!

part 1 . part 2

♪˖ now playing .

all the stars . ( SZA ) ⊹.

Early in the morning, where the sky presented shades of pink and blue, you set off towards the Sully’s marui to collect Neteyam.

You’d gotten used to waking up this early, enjoying the hues of the sky and the coolness of the sea, you’d be happy to share it with Neteyam.

With a small bounce in your stride you quietly greet some hunters that pass, seemingly on their way out for some early morning hunting.

Unknown to you, a few hunters crane their necks back around as you pass, smirking to themselves at the thought of who you were off to see this early.

The whispers amongst them are silent to your ears, your mind already occupied with a certain someone.

It’s safe to assume most of the Sully family is still asleep, they probably would have no reason to be up at this time. Hopefully you wouldn’t have to wake Neteyam.

And your thoughts are cut to and end as you approach the Sully’s marui, a familiar figure sat outside with his legs dipped into the water.

“Good morning, Neteyam.” You speak while walking to stand next to him, keeping your voice at a quiet volume as to not disturb the rest of his sleeping family.

His ears perk up instantly, and he almost turns his whole body around to face you, but quickly calms down and just looks up at you. He inhales. “Good morning, y/n.” Immediate exhale, as if he had been preparing to say the words the second he woke up.

Your eyes scrunch as a smile reaches your face, but your expression turns to one of anxiousness. “I hope you weren’t waiting here too long, and sorry… I never really specified on the time, that was my bad.”

Neteyam doesn’t seem to be too disappointed though, in fact he looks a whole lot more bright after your appearance. “No, no it’s fine, I uh— I woke up awhile ago.” His eyes continuously flicker from your own to the ground as he talks.

With another smile placed on your face you make your way around him, “should we get to the ilu then?”

He scrambles to stand, “yea- okay.” His tail sways low behind him, and he freezes when he hears your quiet laugh as you walk away, a heat rushing to his face.

He mindlessly follows like a lost child.

The sounds of the ocean clashing against itself further relaxes you, and you take a saddle from the rack provided.

“You don’t mind riding with me, right?” You kneel down and start calling out to your ilu.

He abruptly turns to you, “oh, no. No it’s fine… it’s good.” coughing after his words.

“Okay good.” You speak while adjusting the saddle on your ilu. “I wouldn’t want to get separated outside the reef.”

“Yea…” Neteyam’s words slip out involuntarily as he becomes distracted by your attire of the day. It’s beautiful, no doubt. And he somehow feels a little special at the sight of a new outfit on your form as he dives into the cool water.

Once he rises to the surface a shaky exhale leaves him, his breath becomes quick and he sets his gaze upon you who is sat comfortably on your ilu. “It’s so cold.” He states the obvious.

You give him a pitiful smile as your shoulders raise in a silent laugh. “You get used to it.” With that you offer a hand out towards him.

He grasps your hand, but not once breaking his eye contact til he has to.

And now as you both sit on the ilu, Neteyam finds himself contemplating on where he should rest his hands. He would rest them on your waist like any other passenger would, but then again, it’s you.

The girl who had him looking through crowds just to find that certain pair of pretty eyes. The girl who had welcomed him and his family into the clan with no hesitation.

The girl he looked forward to seeing everyday. Who made his mornings a little more brighter.

Such sappy thoughts as he’s sat directly behind you, and it seems his mind had drifted so far that he didn’t realise his own hands, that had already made themselves comfortable around your waist as you direct your ilu out of the reef.

“I’m sorry for making you get up so early, you probably had plans today.” You speak your thoughts aloud, but thing is, Neteyam had cleared his whole schedule for you. Not that he had much planned at all, he had just let his parents know he’d be out for the morning, and they surprisingly didn’t ask for any specific details about his whereabouts.

He snaps out of it, again. “You don’t need to be sorry, I didn’t have anything to do anyways.” He’s pleased as your smile comes back on to your face as he peers out to see your side profile. “And I wanted to come.”

It had been awhile as the two of you continuously dived and surfaced through the water, looking for the best shells. at least, that was the case for you.

Neteyam had forced himself to hold his breath longer than he had practiced for, all to see your form glide through the oceans current.

He admired your movements, this time up close.

The way your hair had moved like silk through the water, and the way your body moved with the direction of the sea.

Once again he needs a breath, he quickly swims up towards the surface with the help of your ilu.

He gasps once he had reached the surface, but wastes no second to quickly plunge his head back underwater to locate you, who had began swimming up towards him.

You surface without so much as a sigh for air. “Are you alright?”

He hates the burning feeling down his throat, the result of accidentally swallowing some of the water when he was to distracted by you. “Yea, sorry I just— I need to practice breathing more, I guess.”

You giggle, and a thought enters your head. “Wait here a second.” You pat his shoulder reassuringly. He gives a shy smile.

You dive underwater once again, this time looking for a specific creature.

After a few moments of being underwater searching, you now come across what you had been looking for, quickly taking it and making your way back to Neteyam.

Once you surface, his head immediately snaps to you, then to the creature in your hands. “What it that?”

“It will help you breathe. You need to make the bond.” You reply and wait for him to connect to the creature, he does so hesitantly but surely. After that was done, you reach around his shoulders to place the creature comfortably on his back. “Now you can stay underwater longer with me.”

His eyes rest on your hands that remain on his shoulders, then back to you. Swallowing before he speaks, “good.”

Your eyes scan over his, what is visible, form before slowly tracing your hand from his shoulder down to his hand.. “Let’s go.” Another warm smile on your face, contagious, as it makes Neteyam smile even bigger.

You guide him by the hand, diving underwater and he follows with no hesitation, your fingers still intertwined.

The sun from above you, casted a shadow to form below you. The both of you look down, waving at your own shadows playfully.

You continue to take him deeper until the two of you are down next to the coral and other various sea life.

‘Let’s look for shells together.’ You sign, detaching your hands.

He looks confused for a moment. In his time of being here in the village, he only learnt some of the underwater language that you and Tsireya had taught him. He followed your hands as they moved… let’s… shells…together? He got the gist of what you’d were communicating, and he nods as a reply.

You take his hand once more, prompting him to follow you as you swim just above the oceans floor, occasionally brushing through it to find any hidden jewels.

While focused on your search, Neteyam finds himself looking at a different type of jewel.

In a way, your skin reminded him of the rich minerals he sometimes found in the caves back at home, a glowing blue that was even prettier under the water.

He also finds himself tightening his grip on your hand, just slightly. It almost goes unnoticed.

With your thumb, you rub his knuckles softly, and he can’t help but blush at the realisation of him being caught.

The two of you had searched the nearby sea top to bottom, occasionally going back up to the surface to breathe and share some words.

Neteyam hated the communication barrier he had with you underwater, and he promises himself that when the next lesson came, he’d try extra hard to get all the signs memorised.

The day continues with the two of you swimming through the water as it slowly got darker, not that either of your had noticed.

You had both found some beautiful shells, and once your hands got full you would put them in the bag that was attached to your ilu’s saddle.

Going through every crevice of the coral and searching every inch of sand, sometimes riding your ilu to go to another location, you both grew tired of the swimming, and you point upwards towards the surface as Neteyam follows.

You both gasp for the air, and quickly open your eyes to find each other. After calling your ilu, it’s then when the both of you realise the time.

The orange and pink hues in the sky indicate it’s soon night. You look at Neteyam, and he looks at you. You both start to laugh at the realisation. You had been out together all day.

“I…” your own giggle stops you for a moment, “sorry I didn’t mean to keep you out this long.”

His own laugh becomes louder, biting his lip to calm down, “no it’s alright. I had a lot of fun.” He climbs his way to sit behind you on your ilu, this time not hesitating to slide his hands around your waist as you guide your ilu underwater back to the village.

While the occasional times the two of you are above the water, you converse about all the shells you found, the topic soon changed though.

“Think we can make it back without our parents making a fuss?” You ponder aloud, momentarily looking behind you to find his gaze.

“No way.” He says, “but it’s worth it.”

“Why’s that?” A puzzled expression is put on your face.

“Because I got to spend time with you.”

Oh? He seemed to be getting more confident with his words, todays events made him more comfortable around you, and you love every second of it.

Shutting your eyes for a second and trying to hold back a smile you speak again. “I liked spending time with you as well.”

You had finally returned back to Awa’atlu. You wait until Neteyam climbed off of the ilu and stood onto the woven platform just above the sea. He reaches a hand out to help you lift yourself up next to him.

Once you had the bag of shells you both collected, and taken the saddle off your ilu, it was time to take yourself and Neteyam back home.

“I’ll walk you home.” You speak as you place the saddle back onto its place on the rack amongst others.

His tails swishes in contemplation. “You don’t mind?”

“No, of course not.”

He hums in appreciation, nodding his head downwards slightly as a sign of respect. The two of you begin walking to Neteyams home.

“We found a lot of good ones today, but I think it’s too much to go through today. So maybe we should take another day to go through it all together.” You state as your hand remains firm on the strap of the bag, “that way we both get an even amount, and you could make some jewellery for your family… if you’d like.”

He brightens up for the umpteenth time that day, the thought of being graced with your presence for another day bringing him to a peaceful mind space. “Yea, definitely. I’m free whenever so, just come over and we can go wherever you’d like.”

Your smile at his words immediately makes his knees feel weak, his heart also speeding up, not that anyone would notice of course.

“Here we are.” You stop a few feet from the entrance to his home. Neteyam snaps out of his trance and is brought back to reality.

“Ah.” He acknowledges, also noting the presence of his whole family inside the marui. “Thank you.” He turns his back to his family to continue conversing with you. “For today I mean, I don’t think I’ve gotten out alot since I got here.” He admits with a shy smile.

“Well, now you’ve got someone who will show you everything.” You reply sweetly, “I promise you ,I’ll take you everywhere on this island.”

Neteyam is stuck by your sincerity, completely in awe. “Sounds like a plan.” He’s starting to look forward to his life in this new environment.

You huff out a short giggle before you remember where you should be, “it’s getting late, I should get back home.” As much as you hate to leave him, it has to be done.

He hums from half disappointment and half understanding. “Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow, y/n.” He takes a glance over your whole form before you had to leave.

“See you, Neteyam.” You wave while you start to head back towards your own home.

He finds himself stood there for a prolonged moment, staring at your retreating form before the voices of his family inside the marui bring him back.

Once inside, he’s immediately stopped upon noticing the silence as he enters, he looks up from the floor, only to find his whole family sat in some form of a circle, staring at him.

His own face turns to one of confusion, raising his brow sassily.

He quickly noticed his fathers smirk, but all attention is put to Lo’ak when he bursts out laughing.

“Stop it! Stop it!” Kiri jabs at him with her finger, also trying to shush tuk as she begins giggling.

Lo’ak gets a few words out in between laughs “well that answers our question.” That’s when his father starts to slip out a few of his own chuckles.

Among all the chaos of the fits of laughter, his mothers voice is what silences it. “Where have you been Neteyam?” She stands up and walks out of the circle towards her son.

“Sorry I— I’ve been out with y/n all day.” No point in making an excuse, especially with his mother.

“All day?” What have you been doing?” She’s quick with her questions and wants all details.

Neteyam gets a little quieter at the tone of his mothers voice. “She asked if I wanted to find shells with her.”

Neytiri softens at her sons tone, and suddenly is pushing his hair off his shoulders, then holding it all back with her hand making it look like he has a ponytail.

She scans for no longer than five seconds before releasing the boys hair. “Just tell someone where you are next time.” She speaks, and then backs off to finish off preparing diner.

Neteyam had watched as him mother left him be, and for a moment he thought he saw a smile on her face.

“Come sit, you’re probably hungry.” She insists once she had realised the fish is now done.

He smiles, and walks towards the circle to sit between his brother and littlest sister, Tuk.

As Neytiri handed out the food, and everyone making conversation of some type, Lo’ak leans a little closer to his older brother, a sly smirk on his face. “So you and y/n huh?

Neteyam pushes his face away with the palm of his hand, “shut up, bro.” He could deny that, but there’s no denying the smile he had on his face the rest of that night.

[maximwtf]

“If you wish so.”

Kamisato Ayato x Reader

Words: 3340

Google docs pages: 7,5

Warnings: Songfic, but I suppose it makes sense even without the lyrics :”D, established relationship, arranged marriage, overworking, angst/comfort

Opening: After marrying the man you’d grown up alongside, you notice how busy his and your life had gotten. You notice how you would be lucky to even see him during the day, and from there your mind spirals to ponder if there is any fixing the marriage anymore. So one night as he comes back to you, you bring the topic up. 

AN// Reader can be any gender! Is it my golden birthday? Yes. Am I still writing fanfiction? Perhaps. The song used here -> Song

“If you wish so.”

You were no stranger to Kamisato Ayato, having known him since you were a child. You grew up together, mostly because your parents were close and had a lot of work they did together. This allowed you to not only get to know him, but train to fight with him. He was always a pleasant opponent, since he knew when to stop and when to be serious. He had respect for his opponents, and clearly had been taught the same way you had. So getting along with him had never been a problem. 

You wish you could have said it had come as a surprise when your time to marry had come around, and the person chosen for you had been Ayato. But you had your premonition that it would have been him. Only, you had never in your adult life discussed something like this with him. The topic of relationships had never come up in the whole time you’d known him. But you had no fear of bringing the topic up, knowing of the polite young adult he’d grown up to be. And you’d been correct. Neither of you were sure if it was going to work out, but understood the weight a relationship such as this would have and together agreed that you’d try to make it work. 

And it had. Later on, you found that you truly fancied him. Maybe you would have figured it out later in life anyway, but the marriage had just sped up the process due to you having to spend more time around him. And you told him this, immediately being assured that he had started to wonder if he was feeling the same way. The realisation had made everything so much easier for the both of you. And not only that, but the public appearances you sometimes made showed the people that you were truly going to stick together. You felt at ease with him. 

But when his parents passed away and the weight of the clan's affairs fell upon him, he’d been drowned in work. You had tried your best to comfort him, to tell him that he was doing a good job. But he had never seemed to truly doubt himself, taking upon loads of work while keeping his sister away from the heavy burdens of the clan. As much help as Thoma was, you still worried for the man. 

But at the end of the day, you found yourself in the same position as him. You were also expected to take on the clan’s affairs, making you separate from Ayato. And from time to time enough that sometimes you didn’t remember when you’d seen him last. And it took a toll on you as well at some point. Why couldn’t things slow down as they’d been when you both had been just a little younger?

“If you wish so, you shall never be restless again. “

So one day you thought to confront him about it. To tell him that he had too much work to do, and that he should ask help with it from time to time. Or even share some of it with you, if that could be of any help. But the conversation had gone almost as you’d expected. 

You’d barely been able to catch him, even for just the moment you needed in order to talk with him. But the moment he saw you, he’d paused. And if you didn’t know any better, you would have missed the pleased look that flashed onto his face the moment he saw you. Appearing for only a short amount of time, yet you knew him well enough to know he was glad to see you.

“Was there anything in particular you wanted to discuss, dear?” Ayato asked, form seemingly now more at ease than before. Something about that easing your mind as well. Not that you’d been worried to bring up anything with him. You trusted the man. “Being at the head of the commission comes at a cost. But don’t you think there is a little too much to do?” You started, not having thought out a speech or even properly how to word your thoughts. A shiver accompanied by panic flashed through your body, quickly adding something to the previous statement. “Of course, I’m confident of your abilities for the position-”, but of course the stuttering and slight worry only amused Ayato, bringing an expression on his face to show that. Though, after that he replied in a more serious tone, knowing as much as you’d stuttered that you’d been serious about this. “Is your work weighing on you? If that is the case, I can assure you something can be done about it. And will, swiftly.” He then said. His voice convincing, not making you doubt for a second that he wouldn’t waste time to take work off your shoulders. He was very comprehensive with decisions such as this. Having dealt with cases like this before, he knew quick fixes for it. But he had gotten it wrong, totally. 

It wasn’t yourself who you were worried about, but him and his well being if he continued to work like he did now for as long as his body allowed him to. Something about a future like that scared you, made you wonder how far was a future like that? A future where he’d work to provide for this family until he couldn’t anymore?

“If you wish so, everything mine shall be yours too. “

You put your hands up, shaking them gently in front of you as a sign that what he thought hadn’t been what you’d meant. “That is not what I meant, dear. And even more so, I do believe you have a heavier workload than I do as things are.” You placed your hand at the back of your neck for comfort, looking at the floor as you thought of a way to make him understand. You could feel his eyes on you, patiently waiting for you to come around. As your eyes travelled back to him, a hint of confusion had laid itself in his eyes. “I wished for us to share the work more evenly. For me to take some of yours.” You finally added, voice a little more quiet than before. Ayato had taken a breath after your statement, mind racing for a moment as he tried to figure out why you weren’t pleased with the way things had been laid out previously? 

He had intentionally made sure to ease your workload and give it to himself. To make sure the affairs of the clan he was meant to take care of wouldn’t weigh on you too much. To keep your mind off of the dirtiest businesses the clan came across from time to time. How long had you been displeased? It confused him further, but none of it did he let show on the outside. A deeply rooted habit. 

“I couldn’t possibly allow you to do that for me.” He started, tilting his head ever so slightly. His voice still held the same calmness as before, as it usually did. “I hope you understand. There is no one else I should worry with the tasks meant for myself.” And he was right. 

The work the commissioner did was not something anyone from the staff could do, nor were they allowed to do it. But that’s exactly why you’d offered to help him, to take some of the workload, knowing he allowed you to see the things he saw. And maybe he saw it as trouble enough that you knew of such things. That he thought he was troubling you even by allowing himself to talk to you about them. But you wanted to help. 

“If you wish so, I’ll take your religion. “

But you had to show him that it wasn’t only the workload that was given unevenly that worried you. It wasn’t fairness that you sought after. You worried for his health and future, and most of all missed him. Missed talking to him like you were talking now. Only, about more pleasant topics. 

You might have intertwined the clans for political reasons, but you did care about him as a friend and as a lover. You would have felt bad later on if you never told him, or if you backed down now and didn’t try your best to convince him. 

“But you are worrying me as it is. Worrying me with the workload you have and the stress it puts you under.” You sighed, shaking your head slightly before continuing the rant. “You work so late, I often fear you don’t sleep enough. Worry, because at times I don’t see you in the morning. Nor do I see you at night.” The last words were spoken more silently, having a hard time admitting that you missed him. That being one of the main reasons why you’d even dared to talk to him about this. 

Ayato’s gaze had softened, a type of realisation hitting him as he keenly listened to you speak your mind. “I long to be with you again, is what I’m saying. I pine to talk to you before falling asleep and-” You stopped yourself there, afraid someone might hear you if you rambled on. Knowing that you shouldn’t discuss private matters out in the open like this. But also because you couldn’t emotionally bear to talk about such deep feelings all of a sudden. And by the looks of it, Ayato had understood the point. 

He now understood where the speech was coming from, why you wanted to ease his workload so desperately. And he would have been lying if he said he hadn’t once thought of wanting to go back to how things were. When there hadn’t been as much to do. But the thought made him feel like he was being pulled in two directions at once. 

But he knew he couldn’t fully promise you anything as things were now. All he could do was give you some kind of reassurance. Maybe that would help, even if it pained him to deal with this in such a way. “I may have a few tricks up my sleeve. I’ve made note of it now and…I’ll see what I can do.” He said confidently, but you couldn’t tell if it was a facade this time. He was far too skilled with covering his actual intentions with the way he spoke. Though, the hand he’d placed on your waist before placing an affectionate kiss on your upper cheek gave you some hope. Perhaps false hope, but you wanted to believe it was real. 

And with that he'd gotten back on track with what he’d been doing previously. 

“If you wish so, even your lies shall be the truth to me. “

But as you’d expected, the hope had been false. As days passed on, you could tell he was still busy as ever and having if not more work to do. But you didn’t complain to him about it. Didn’t whine or get clingy as you had felt after the previous conversation. It had taken some time to shake off the feeling of that after. 

But this morning, he’d woken up around the time you had. Giving you time to have breakfast with him, which felt like a blessing directly from Celestia. And not only that, but Ayato had managed to surprise you with what he’d had on his mind for a short while now. “I was planning on quitting work slightly earlier tonight. How about we go for a stroll after, what do you say?” He said calmly while enjoying his food. But even the divine smell of the well prepared food couldn’t distract you from the shock this plan had given you. Thrilled, but not allowing it to show you formed a somewhat comprehensible reply. “That would be much appreciated, dear.” You said politely, swiftly starting to eat as to appear too busy to add anything else to that. 

You didn’t see if Ayato had seen the excitement in your eyes, but if you knew him at all you would have guessed that he had. He wasn't one to miss on even the slightest expressions, having become quite awfully skilled at reading people in the past few years. But a part of you wished he’d seen the excitement. Seen it so you could hide the internal fear that this was another lie. No, you didn’t want to call them lies, knowing he was truly trying his best to make this work after the initial conversation. 

But something in your gut told you to be wary of such promises. There was no knowing if something urgent would come up today and ruin the plan. And it would hurt more the more excited you were. 

“If you wish so, I’ll move to Andorra, so maybe I’ll see you again. “

And so you waited patiently. Did your daily work with care and finished just early enough to prepare yourself slightly for when he returned as well. You hadn’t even worried when he’d taken a little longer than expected, knowing he had more to do than you. He would come eventually. 

But as you’d feared, he never came. As the last rays of the sun finally disappeared, you gave up the last bits of hope that he was even going to be back before supper. Something must have come up, knowing you hadn’t seen Thoma much either. But that didn’t change the fact that waiting for someone who wasn’t going to come to you hurt. 

Of course you had expected something like this, but a part of you still hoped something could be done about this situation. But then again, the work the two of you did was important and mostly private. So you couldn’t ask for someone to help you sort this out. It was up to your attempts and you weren’t sure how far Ayato was willing to stretch, if at all. But you did want to see him more. To spend time with him. 

There was a sense of comfort when the two of you could only be, take off the facade for a moment and just talk. But that had been in the past for a while now. And of course you couldn’t speak for him, but you felt the need to talk like that again. To share your thoughts with him. You’d do anything to get to do that again. 

“Without you I’m drowning within restless nights, and without you..you see. “

After waiting for him for long enough, you decided it was best to give up. He’d come back around the same time he usually did, and maybe you’d have time to talk to him tomorrow about this. So you headed to bed. 

But the sleep that usually came to you easily was so hard to reach tonight. Your mind spiralled, upset and even a little angry that things weren’t working the way you wished. Usually the voice of reason sorted out your thoughts, but that comforting voice was gone. Far too tired to try thinking logically, your mind kept feeding your feelings and keeping you awake. Even when you felt worn out, you couldn’t find it in you to let your mind rest and fall asleep. 

With no sense of time, you didn’t know how much time had passed. But the sound footsteps approaching the bed caught your attention. Your breathing stilled, ears keen on the soft sounds. He had always been so careful not to wake you up when he knew he was coming back so late. 

The mattress on his side moved as he sat down, a low sight leaving the man. You contemplated not turning around, pretending as if you’d fallen asleep already. But still in your feels you decided best to face him, turning around on the bed. The room was quite dark at this hour, but you could tell he was surprised to see you awake. 

“How come are you still up, dear?” Came to his mind first, the concerned question slipping out almost automatically. You wanted to tell him the reason, but at that moment the reasoning started sounding more and more risible. Instead, you lifted yourself to a sitting position, keeping the covers over your shoulders to maintain the comforting warmth they were radiating. 

But something about your mannerism seemed to have been enough to let him catch up on what was going on. “Ah, I see”, his voice lowered but there was no anger in it. He’d sounded more upset than anything. And you could tell that even in your tired state of mind. “Dear, I apologise. You have my word, not a moment went by when I didn’t regret coming back earlier.” He continued speaking. But this time you knew his words weren’t lies or false hope on his part as well. He was being honest, clear regret in the way he spoke to you. 

You didn’t know what to tell him. His words brought some peace of mind, but they couldn’t change the fact that you missed him. Missed talking to him just as you were talking right now. Raw. But the more time you spent without replying, the more intense his weighing gaze on you felt. 

But there was nothing to be said. You’d tried everything that had come to mind. But maybe this was the last option you had left, as pathetic as it was. “I miss you”, you whined out as the lump in your throat felt harder to swallow down. Ayato’s brows furrowed. 

“Without you, I’m halfway to Hell. “

His hand placed itself carefully to your arm, bringing you both closer to one another. His movements, as careful as they were, weren’t unsure. But he was treating the situation as gently as he could. 

Not that he hadn’t taken you seriously the previous time you’d clearly tried to work around stating the topic like this. He’d tried taking your thoughts into account, but he hadn’t yet found anything that would work. And the thought of that ached at the back of his mind constantly. But the way you’d stayed up until now and tried reaching out once more shone new light at how much he needed to fix something. 

His free hand placed itself at the nape of your neck, moving gently up to your jawline. You leaned into the touch, chewing on your inner lip as you waited for him to say something. “And that feeling is warranted. And believe me when I say, mutual.” He said, gaze soft but firmly on you. “Then come back to me.” You sniffed, looking down for a moment as you quickly wiped your eyes. His hand was fast to tilt your head back up, but only as a mere suggestion to which you responded by obeying. “I will”, the man’s softened voice replied. “For far too long to my comfort I’ve ignored the duty of utmost importance to me. And that is family matters, and it includes you.” He said, surprising even himself of the way he’d held himself together. 

The way he spoke assured you, even if only a little. A wry smile made its way to your face, the tears previously threatening to well up had disappeared. “Thank you.” Was all you could think of, overwhelmed and tired. And you assumed he could tell both of those things by the way he replied. “I’ll discuss this with Thoma and you tomorrow morning.” He said, pressing a light kiss to the top of your head. “But before that, I think sleep is in order?” And he was right, of course. “For you too”, you reminded him as you knew in the past he had a tendency to stay up even if you’d fallen asleep. But to that comment he replied with a delighted, yet exhausted sounding chuckle. “Hehe, of course.” He nodded, giving you a proper kiss before lying down. And even if this was nothing new, falling asleep cuddled up to him felt refreshing. Knowing that you’d seen him before falling asleep, and you would see him again in the morning. 

AN// Heehee, an angst with comfort at the end for my birthday. How fitting, aye? This was also a little testrun for Ayato, see how he feels to write for. So hopefully he’s not too ooc !

[mxtxfanatic]

Jin Ling and the Curse of Escalating Abuse

Seeing the complex nature of the relationship between Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng, I wanted to cover the topic of escalating abuse of the uncle towards his nephew, as Jiang Cheng is abusive towards Jin Ling throughout the entire story but that abuse shifts as the story goes on. Note: this is not an essay about how abusive people can love their victims still. I know Jiang Cheng loves his nephew, but that love means nothing in the face of him continuously being the force that drives the young boy to danger. Love does not absolve abuse. Moving on: though many of the scenes I mention are gone over in multiple translations, I will only be using one source per scene for my argument, as none of them are worded radically different. I will, however, include the other translations under the cut for anyone who wants to see them for comparison.

In the early section of the novels, we learn two important bits of information about how Jin Ling views his maternal uncle, Jiang Cheng:

From as early as Jin Ling could remember, he had never seen Jiang Cheng’s face make the expression it was currently making. His uncle, who had led the distinguished Yunmeng Jiang Clan alone since the man had been young, had been cold, severe, and gloomy for years and years on end. Not a single lenient or merciful word left Jiang Cheng’s mouth if he could help it, nor was he ever willing to offer charity and kindness.

–Chapt. 23: Malice I, fanyiyi

Angrily, [Jin Ling] leapt onto his feet and pulled out his sword on the spot. “How dare you hit me! Even my uncle’s never hit me!”

Surprised, Wei Wuxian said, “Really? But doesn’t he say he’s going to break your legs all the time?”

“He’s just saying that!” Jin Ling raged.

–Chapt. 24: Malice II, fanyiyi

From Jin Ling’s perspective, his maternal uncle is always acerbic and never kind, but he has never been physically abusive to Jin Ling. Plus though he often threatens Jin Ling with physical abuse–threatening to break his legs or use Zidian on him–Jin Ling considers this all talk. In fact, Jiang Cheng’s abuse of Jin Ling stays firmly in the realm of verbal and emotional for most of the story. His most common insults to throw at his nephew are about Jin Ling appearing unworthy of his position as Jin (and Jiang) heir, in almost a mimicry of how Madam Yu would tell him that he was unworthy of being the Jiang heir in comparison to Wei Wuxian:

Frowning, he said, “Jin Ling, how much time are you going to waste? Do you need me to go over there and invite you back? Look at your sorry state—why the hell haven’t you gotten back up!?”

–Chapt. 7: Pride II, fanyiyi

“‘Fine’?” Jiang Cheng said. “You look like you took a tumble in a muddy ditch—you call that ‘fine?’ Aren’t you embarrassed to be wearing your clan’s uniform? Go back and change immediately! Out with it—what did you run into today?”

–Chapt. 23: Malice I, fanyiyi

He is also shown to have a bad habit of lashing out instead of expressing any emotion that could be considered nice, just like Jin Ling says:

Upon seeing that Jin Ling was fine, Jiang Cheng’s heart crashed back to earth like a boulder. Immediately furious, he said, “Didn’t you bring a signal? Don’t you know to fire it if you encounter something like this? Don’t try to show off! Come here!”

–Chapt. 10: Pride V, fanyiyi

And because of Jiang Cheng’s outward lack of concern for Jin Ling’s health and safety–prefering barbs over comfort–Jin Ling refuses to be vulnerable with him, keeping his fears, concerns, disappointments, and even positive emotions like relief to himself. Outwardly, he lashes out, just like he has learned to do from his maternal uncle:

Since Jin Ling hadn’t caught the soul eating maiden, he was also angry. “Wasn’t it you who told me I had to take the thing down no matter what?! You told me if I didn’t get it, I should never come see you again!”

–Chapt. 10: Pride V, fanyiyi

Annoyed, Jin Ling said, “I already told you, I didn’t run into anything! It was just a fall. The whole journey was a waste of time.”

–Chapt. 23: Malice I, fanyiyi

The one who called was Jiang Cheng, who stood near the edge. Still teary-eyed, as soon as Jin Ling saw his uncle, he immediately wiped his face, sniffing. He looked here and there and finally made up his mind to fly over, landing at Jiang Cheng’s side.

Jiang Cheng grabbed him, “What happened to you? Who did this to you?!”

Jin Ling rubbed his eyes roughly, refusing to speak up.

–Chapt. 84: Loyalty, exr

Who can blame him, though? Almost every life-threatening situation Jin Ling finds himself in is a direct result of Jiang Cheng’s cruelty towards him: from attempting to fight to goddess statue without calling for help, to ending up almost suffocated in the walls of the Nie Clan Saber Hall, and even to him winding up in Yi City:

Jiang Cheng’s next words were wrapped in thorns. “Why are you still standing there? Are you waiting for prey to rush toward you and stick themselves on your sword? If you can’t capture whatever’s living in Dafan Mountain, don’t ever come see me again!”

–Chapt. 8: Pride III, fanyiyi

It seemed that the boy hadn’t come to Qinghe alone. No surprise—at Dafan Mountain, Jiang Cheng had come to support his nephew, so why wouldn’t he come this time too? Only it seemed that the uncle and nephew had gotten into an argument in Qinghe Town, which caused Jin Ling to set off for Xinglu Ridge on his own.

–Chapt. 23: Malice I, fanyiyi

It turned out that, having tricked his uncle and released Wei Wuxian several days ago, Jin Ling had been worried that Jiang Cheng would actually break his legs, so he had decided to sneak off and disappear, intending to reappear in front his uncle only after Jiang Cheng’s temper had cooled.

–Chapt. 35: Flora III, fanyiyi

As much as Jin Ling wants to assure everyone that “that’s just how his uncle is” and show us how unbothered he is by Jiang Cheng’s behavior, he does actually fear the man. And with good reason to! Now let’s address the elephant in the room: Jiang Cheng very much so does want to be physically harm Jin Ling, and this almost always correlates to Jin Ling talking back/not listening to him. Take this scene from right after the juniors survive the goddess statue and Jin Ling reminding Jiang Cheng that he was the one who told the boy to either catch the beast on Dafan Mountain or never return to him:

Jiang Cheng wanted to slap the stinking brat so hard he’d fly back up his mother’s birth canal—but he did actually say those words. Since he couldn’t very well embarrass himself, the Clan Chief could only turn to sarcastically mocking the cultivators scattered randomly over the ground. “So what exactly thrashed all of you into looking so dignified?”

–Chapt. 10: Pride V, fanyiyi

The thing stopping him from slapping Jin Ling is the fact that Jiang Cheng publicly told the boy not to come back if he was not successful, and he has been publicly called out when trying to take Jin Ling to task. Being unable to swipe at the boy as he wishes, he then turns his attention to his disciples to punish, as they are lower than him in rank and therefore no one can chastise him on his unbecoming behavior. But once we get to the scenes where all social hierarchy and propriety break down–the second siege and Guanyin Temple–all hands are loosed:

Jiang Cheng forced himself to walk over to Jin Ling, grabbing him at once, “Did you get hurt?!”

Jin Ling’s breaths even smelled like rust, “I didn’t. I...”

Jiang Cheng immediately slapped him onto the ground, scolding, “You didn’t?! Then I’ll make you get hurt and teach you the lesson! You damn brat turning a deaf ear to my words?!”

–Chapt. 81: Loyalty, exr

Jiang Cheng shoved Jin Ling, who’d been holding him up helplessly, out of the way...

...With panic, Jin Ling stood in front of Jiang Cheng, “HanGuang-Jun! My uncle’s hurt...”

Jiang Cheng slapped him onto the ground, “Let him come! Am I scared of him?!”

–Chapt. 102: Hatred, exr

Social etiquette no longer exists in a life-or-death battle or hostage situation, so Jiang Cheng has no face to maintain in front of anyone else. But by this point in the story, Jin Ling has spent a considerable amount of time with two role models who do show him kindness, care, and support. He begins to crave that parental love he has been deprived of, starting from the second siege:

A few sect leaders clutched onto their sons, cautioning them, “When the corpses rush inside all at once, protect yourself and try to get out. Stay alive no matter what! You understand?!”

As Jin Ling heard this, he felt himself cringe, but somewhere deep down he hoped that his uncle would say something similar as well. He waited for a while, but nothing came from Jiang Cheng...

–Chapt. 81: Loyalty, exr

And when Jiang Cheng finally hits him for the first time, Jin Ling’s only reaction is to look towards wangxian:

He sat down, catching his breath as his eyes turned to the two sitting at the side of the Demon-Slaughtering Cave closest to the outside.

Both Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi were a mess.

–Chapt. 81: Loyalty, exr

Finally, all of the dysfunction in Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng’s relationship comes to a head in Guanyin Temple, the climax of the story. Jiang Cheng’s behavior escalates into physical violence towards his last living relative, while Jin Ling is no longer lashing out at his uncle in place of being vulnerable but is also no longer able to brush off Jiang Cheng’s cruelty as acceptable. He has had his entire worldview turned on its head, and out of that, realizes that he does not want to continue the cycle of abuse and hatred that Jiang Cheng tries to force him to inherit, but would rather follow the path of love and kindness that Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji have shown him is possible.

Jin Ling on Jiang Cheng’s personality:

For as long as he could remember, Jin Ling had never seen Jiang Cheng with such an expression. His uncle, who had single-handedly led the Jiang Clan of Yunmeng at a tender young age, was always cold and gloomy. He was merciless and never kind with his words.

–Chapt. 23: Malevolent Part 1: Running into Gunpoint, taming wangxian

From the beginning of his memory until now, Jin Ling had never seen such a look on Jiang Cheng’s face before. This uncle of his who led the prominent YunmengJiang Sect ever since a young age had always been cold and dark. When he spoke, he was willing to neither show mercy nor do good.

–Chapt. 23: Malice, exr

Jin Ling saying Jiang Cheng has never hit him before and is all talk:

Jin Ling stirred awake after a while. He rubbed his neck, which was still hurting, then angrily drew his sword and sprung up. “How dare you hit me! Even my uncle has never hit me before!”

Wei Wuxian was shocked. “Is that so? Doesn’t he frequently say that he will break your legs?”

Jin Ling raged, “He had never meant what he said!! You fucking cutsleeve, what do you want? I ...”

–Chapt. 24: Malevolent Part 2: Escape, taming wangxian

He was so angry that he jumped up and unsheathed his sword at once, “How dare you hit me! My uncle hadn’t even hit me before!”

Wei WuXian exclaimed, “Really? Doesn’t he say that he’ll break your legs all the time?”

Jin Ling fumed, “He’s only saying that! You damn cut- sleeve, what on Earth do you want? I...”

–Chapt. 24: Malice, exr

Jiang Cheng’s insults to Jin Ling:

He scowled, “Jin Ling, why are you wasting so much time? Do I have to come over to invite you back? You look like a mess now; why aren’t you getting up?”

–Chapt. 7: The Prideful Part 2: Wangji Finally Makes his Appearance! taming wangxian

He frowned, “Jin Ling, why did you linger for so long? Do you really need me to come and pick you up? Look at what a terrible situation you’re in right now, and get up!”

–Chapt. 7: Arrogance, exr

Jiang Cheng said, “Safe and sound? You look like you’ve been rolling around in the gutters, how is that ‘safe and sound’? Aren’t you ashamed to be wearing your family’s uniform? Hurry back now and get changed! Spit it out, what did you encounter today?”

–Chapt. 23: Malevolent Part 1: Running into Gunpoint, taming wangxian

Jiang Cheng, “Nothing wrong? You look like you just rolled around in a muddy ditch, and you say there’s nothing wrong with you! Don’t you think that it’s an embarrassment to be wearing your sect’s uniform? Hurry back and change into something else! Speak. What did you run into today?”

–Chapt. 23: Malice, exr

Jiang Cheng lashing out at Jin Ling in place of concern:

Jiang Cheng was greatly relieved when he saw that Jin Ling was not harmed. He immediately began to reprimand him. “Didn’t you bring the signals with you? Why didn’t you release it even though you were up against something like this? Were you trying to show off? Come over here now!”

 –Chapt. 10: The Prideful Part 5: I’m Bringing This Man Back to the Lan Estate, taming wangxian

Seeing that Jin Ling was safe, Jiang Cheng finally calmed down. Quickly afterward, he scolded angrily, “Didn’t you bring signal firelights with you? Don’t you know to use them when you meet something like this? What are you pretending to be strong for? Scram over here!”

–Chapt. 10: Arrogance, exr

Jiang Cheng’s behavior pushing Jin Ling into danger:

Jiang Cheng then said in a scathing tone, “Why are you still standing there? The prey’s not going to stab themselves with your swords! If you can’t capture whatever’s on Dafan Mountain, don’t look for me again!”

–Chapt. 8: The Prideful Part 3: Discovering His Good Looks After Cleaning Up, taming wangxian

Jiang Cheng turned again, his words covered with thorns, “Why are you still standing there? Waiting for the prey to come and throw itself onto your sword? If, today, you don’t catch the creature hunting Dafan Mountain, don’t come to me ever again!”

–Chapt. 8: Arrogance, exr

It turned out that Jin Ling didn’t come to Qinghe alone. That wasn’t surprising; previously, Jiang Cheng had also provided him with back-up on Dafan Mountain, so why wouldn’t he be here this time? However, from the looks of it, the uncle and nephew probably had an argument in Qinghe, hence Jin Ling had trekked up Xinglu Ridge alone.

–Chapt. 23: Malevolent Part 1: Running into Gunpoint, taming wangxian

It appeared that Jin Ling didn’t come to Qinghe alone. Well, no wonder. Last time, at Dafan Mountain, Jiang Cheng had been there to assist him, so why wouldn’t he have come this time? However, looking at this now, it seemed that the two had a quarrel in the town of Qinghe, which was why Jin Ling went up the Xinglu Ridge alone

–Chapt. 23: Malice, exr

It turned out that a few days ago, after Jin Ling had sent Jiang Cheng away on a lie and released Wei Wuxian, he was worried that his uncle might really break his legs this time around. Hence, he decided to sneak out and disappear for a couple of weeks, then reappear when Jiang Cheng’s anger had subsided.

–Chapt. 35: Foliage Part 3: The Paper Effigies Shop and Glutinous Rice Porridge, taming wangxian

Ever since a few days ago, after Jin Ling lied to his uncle and let Wei WuXian go, he had been worried that this time Jiang Cheng would really break his legs, so he decided to sneak out and disappear for a few days, not appearing in front of Jiang Cheng until his anger subsided.

–Chapt. 35: Grasses, exr

Jin Ling refusing to be vulnerable with Jiang Cheng/lashing out:

Jin Ling was furious that he failed to capture the soul-eating fairy, and retorted, “Didn’t you say I had to capture it at all costs? And that I shouldn’t return to you empty handed!”

–Chapt. 10: The Prideful Part 5: I’m Bringing This Man Back to the Lan Estate, taming wangxian

Jin Ling was also angered from not capturing the soul- consuming goddess, “Weren’t you the one who told me that I have to catch it? And, if I don’t catch it, I shouldn’t go see you?”

–Chapt. 10: Arrogance, exr

Jin Ling said impatiently, “I’ve already told you that I didn’t encounter anything. I slipped and fell. It was a wasted trip. Ouch!” He yelled, “Don’t you drag me around like this! I’m not three years old!”

–Chapt. 23: Malevolent Part 1: Running into Gunpoint, taming wangxian

Jin Ling replied impatiently, “I already said that I didn’t run into anything. I tripped, and it was a waste of time. Ow!” He shouted, “Don’t tug on me like that! I’m not three-years- old!”

–Chapt. 23: Malice, exr

The voice that had called out earlier had belonged to the man standing at the head of the ship, none other than Jiang Cheng. Between tears, Jin Ling peered out and upon seeing his uncle, he abruptly stopped crying and quickly rubbed away his tears. Sniffing slightly, he looked around, clenching his teeth as he quickly flew over to Jiang Cheng’s side. Jiang Cheng grasped Jin Ling’s shoulders in alarm, asking, “What happened to you? Who bullied you!”

Rubbing his eyes forcefully, Jin Ling remained silent.

–Chapt. 84 Loyalty: Little Friends, chiaki_himura

The voice earlier had come from Jiang Cheng. Jin Ling’s eyes were misty with tears. Hearing his uncle’s voice, he immediately wiped his face clean, sniffed his nose, looked back and forth between the two ships, and then finally decided to fly over. The second Jin Ling landed besides him, Jiang Cheng had his hands on him, “What’s wrong? Who bullied you?!”

Jin Ling wiped at his eyes hard, but refused to speak.

–Chapt. 84: “Core” Part 6, boat-full-of-lotus-pods

Jiang Cheng wishing violence on Jin Ling:

Jiang Cheng wanted to slap this kid so hard that he would be forced back into his mother’s womb. However, these were his very own words; how could he take them back?

–Chapt. 10: The Prideful Part 5: I’m Bringing This Man Back to the Lan Estate, taming wangxian

Jiang Cheng seriously wanted to slap the rotten brat so hard that he went back inside his mother’s stomach. However, he really did say so himself, and he shouldn’t prove himself wrong.

–Chapt. 10: Arrogance, exr

Jiang Cheng physically harming Jin Ling:

Jiangcheng limped quickly towards Jin Ling, grabbing him his shoulders with both hands as he said angrily, “Are you hurt!”

Breathing heavily, Jin Ling murmured, “No, I......”

Jiang Cheng had landed a slap on Jin Ling’s face as he berated, “No?! If you’re not hurt then let me give you something to hurt about! You rascal, turning a deaf ear to my words now, aren’t you?!”

–Chapt. 81 Loyalty: Corpses of the Burial Mound, chiaki_himura

Jiang Cheng limped towards Jin Ling, grabbed him and yelled, “Are you injured!”

Even Jin Ling’s laboured breaths were tainted with the smell of blood, “No, I…….”

Jiang Cheng immediately slapped him onto the group, “No?! Then take this as a reminder for what you just did! Do my words mean nothing to you, you little shit!”

–Chapt. 81: “Core” Part 3, boat-full-of-lotus-pods

Jiang Cheng pushed away Jin Ling who had been supporting him, and despite having lost so much blood, his face remained flushed with anger as he roared, “How could you?! Wei Wuxian, how could you?!”...

...Lan Wangji stood up furiously as Jin Ling leapt in front of Jiang Cheng again, trembling as he begged, “HanGuang-Jun! My uncle is injured......”

Jiang Cheng struck a blow on Jin Ling, causing him to stumble to the ground.

–Chapt. 102 Hatred: I’m Sorry, I Swallowed My Words, chiaki_himura

Jin Ling wanting to hear kind words from Jiang Cheng:

Several sect leaders grabbed onto their offspring, urgently directing them, “When the corpses rush in, you have to protect yourself and find a way to escape. You must stay alive no matter what! Do you understand?!”

Hearing the desperation in the parents’ voices, Jin Ling felt a pang of sadness. Deep down, he had hoped that perhaps Jiang Cheng would also say this to him, but however long he waited, nothing came out of it...

–Chapt. 81 Loyalty: Corpses of the Burial Mound, chiaki_himura

Various Sect and Clan Leaders had grabbed their own sons, warning, “When the corpses rush in, you will protect yourself, and find a way to escape! You must survive no matter what happens! Do you understand me?!”

Hearing this, a sourness churned within Jin Ling. A part of him longed to hear those same words from his own uncle. But after waiting for a few, long moments, Jiang Cheng showed no sign of speaking up.

–Chapt. 81: “Core” Part 3, boat-full-of-lotus-pods

Jin Ling looking to wangxian for comfort:

After taking the blow, Jin Ling couldn’t stand any further and sat onto the ground heavily, breathing deeply as his eyes travelled to the silhouettes of the two people sitting closest to the entrance of the cave.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji were a mess.

–Chapt. 81 Loyalty: Corpses of the Burial Mound, chiaki_himura

Yet Jiang Cheng* himself had no energy left to stand after giving this slap. He sat down heavily, breathing hard as he glared at the two figures closest to the mouth of the Demon-Crouching Cave.

Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi were a mess.

–Chapt. 81: “Core” Part 3, boat-full-of-lotus-pods

*boat-full-of-lotus-pods is the only translation of the three I have of Chapt. 81 that says that Jiang Cheng is the one who looks at wangxian. Both exr and chiaki_himura say that this is Jin Ling.

[redux-iterum]

Charred Legacy: Chapter Nineteen

(AO3 counterpart here.)

The snowclouds did not barrage the Clan that night; when daytime passed, some of the disturbed snow had melted away, revealing patches of ground in the general shape of paws and swipes. The dark rolled around again, revealing just enough of the sky to confirm by the full moon that it was Gathering night.

“We’ve really been here long enough to actually make it around to a Gathering,” Teaselfoot remarked. “Can you imagine how bold the prey has gotten in the forest with no one to catch them?”

Mutters of agreement cluttered the air. Fireheart looked between his Clanmates, who were antsy, annoyed or an unpleasant combination of both. His eyes went to Bluestar, watching her stand stock still, head slightly hanging. He couldn’t see her expression from here, but her posture made him nervous.

Speckletail decided to go this time, and she was the one to select the party. The newest apprentices were all chosen, much to their excitement, as well as Fireheart, Ravenwing, Lizardtail, and, regrettably, Darkstripe.

“He just needs to stop sitting in the Barn all night and day,” Ravenwing whispered to Fireheart. “I heard her talking to him about that the other night.”

Fireheart looked at Darkstripe, head slightly tilted. Their eyes made contact and Darkstripe’s lip twitched before he looked away with a growl. Fireheart made the wise choice to not say anything. He just followed Speckletail and Bluestar out of the Barn, his tail pointedly high and relaxed.

The apprentices gabbed to each other gleefully as they made their way through the hedge and started down the long walk from the top of the moors. They didn’t appear to notice the chilly wind that accompanied them on their way, their long and fluffy fur more puffed up with excitement as they talked.

“Now we get to see the other Clans and talk to them!” Brightpaw said, her tail dancing around.

“We already did,” Thornpaw said with a frown.

“We didn’t get to talk to them, really,” Brackenpaw piped up. “We just got to see them. But now we’ll see apprentices, too! How small do you think ShadowClan’s are?”

“However small or large,” Fireheart said, “don’t make fun of them, please. It’s better to make friends with them and learn new things.”

Brackenpaw balked. “We won’t! I was curious, that’s all!”

“What if they make fun of us?” Brightpaw asked. “Can we fight them? For, like, um… teasing Snowpaw?”

“No,” Speckletail said patiently. She swapped an amused look with Fireheart. “There’s no fighting on this night, you know that.”

“Oh, I have a question.” Brackenpaw picked up his pace a little to walk alongside Ravenwing and Snowpaw. “How do we tell Snowpaw what’s going on?”

Watching his brother’s mouth, Snowpaw now looked up to his mentor, head tilted.

“I’ll be with him to explain,” Ravenwing said. “You three can talk to whoever you want.”

“But what about Snowpaw?” Brackenpaw persisted. “Can’t he talk with us?”

Fireheart and Ravenwing looked at each other, Ravenwing visibly struggling to find a good response.

“Well, the thing is that the other Clans won’t know what he’s saying,” he said after a moment of thought. “We came up with our own way, and that’s not their way, if they have one at all. So someone has to be with him to translate.”

“Ohhh,” Brackenpaw and Brightpaw said together.

“We can transl’te, too, though,” Thornpaw offered.

“It would be good for him to meet cats his age on his own,” Lizardtail agreed, speaking to Ravenwing. “I don’t mean to tell you how to train your apprentice, but I’d say it’s good experience to deal with the other Clans without you around.”

Ravenwing’s ears went back anxiously. “I mean… maybe, yeah, but…”

Fireheart flicked his tail with a paw, forcing him to hop a step. “I think Lizardtail’s right. Just keep an eye on him from a distance.” He turned to the apprentices. “And you’ll stay with him during the entire Gathering, right?”

Snowpaw’s siblings nodded in unison. Snowpaw himself nosed Ravenwing and tilted his head again, chattering with his teeth: his way of asking what someone had said. Ravenwing responded with a few signs, as well as moving his lips. Snowpaw nodded eagerly and slowed down a little, walking more sideways to join his brothers and sister.

“Who’s there?” Speckletail called suddenly.

Everyone looked forward again, just in time to see a WindClan patrol seemingly bloom out of the snowy, dead grass. Rookstar was at the lead; it occurred to Fireheart that of course they would be going to the Gathering too.

“Didn’t mean to startle you,” Rookstar said with a nod. “Thought we might walk with you.”

Darkstripe glared down at the ground, baring his teeth to himself.

“You’re more than welcome to.” Speckletail nodded back. “It is your territory.”

Rookstar didn’t exactly chuff, but his whiskers may have moved a sliver. His followers gathered to the side of the ThunderClan party—and, to Fireheart’s delight, Wrenwhisker was among them. He snuck a look at Ravenwing, who suddenly had great interest in the apprentices’ chatter with Wrenwhisker’s apprentice, Gorsepaw.

“Cold night,” Wrenwhisker commented casually. “For us.”

“Yeah…” Fireheart shook himself as the wind nipped his side. “ThunderClan is so lucky to have long coats. Well, until summer. Then they’re miserable and I feel great.”

Wrenwhisker hummed. His eyes flickered to Ravenwing, then to Snowpaw.

“New apprentice?” he asked flatly.

“Fairly new,” Fireheart replied. “Wait until Ravenwing tells you about him. He’s a special one.”

Another hum, and companionable silence fell between the toms. Fireheart’s tail curled over his back, even with the wind biting at it and tempting him to tuck it between his legs.

They reached Fourtrees at the same time as RiverClan, with ShadowClan already waiting there. The gathered cats melded together easily—a few RiverClan cats gave scattered greetings to Fireheart as they passed by him, and he had to gently paw Ravenwing when he nervously fidgeted, watching Snowpaw disappear into a crowd of young apprentices after his siblings.

“He’ll be fine,” Wrenwhisker said when Ravenwing explained Snowpaw’s disability. “Not like a hawk can snatch him up right now.”

“Stars, don’t even joke,” Ravenwing muttered.

“Sorry.” Wrenwhisker’s voice was bare-bones committal, but Fireheart could catch sincerity in his stony face.

Ravenwing didn’t respond beyond a flick of the ear.

Moments later, a call sounded off, and conversation ceased as every face turned to the leaders sitting together on their boulder. Bluestar’s nose was nearly pointed to the ground, her eyes (what Fireheart could see of them) foggy again.

“Good evening, one and all!” Crookedstar began. Fireheart noted with some relief that the pained weight had lifted a bit out of his eyes. “I hope we all have good news to report. We here of RiverClan certainly do!”

“Then you first,” Rookstar said.

Crookedstar winked at him. “You’re going to love this one, old friend. Our deputy, my brother…” The weight returned for just an instant and Crookedstar took a breath. “…was sadly killed by the dogs, along with his apprentice.” Murmurs of sympathy flitted through the other Clans. “However, we’ve been fortunate that the dogs appear to have gotten bored of us and gone to greener pastures. We feed well and we have a bright future with our new deputy, Leoparddawn.”

Rookstar blinked rapidly. “Leoparddawn.”

“You heard me right!” Crookedstar said. “And she was Oakclaw’s suggestion, all those years ago.”

Rookstar snorted and looked down, shaking his head. If Fireheart didn’t know better, he would say the elderly leader was hiding a chuff. He looked up, face blank again except for the slightest crease of his eyes.

“That’ll be fun,” he said. “Good luck.”

“HA!” Crookedstar beamed at his fellow leader. “I told you. Now…” He looked to Bluestar, then, when she didn’t look back, to Blackstar. “How about you?”

Blackstar stood and stepped forward, rigid and serious as ever. “ShadowClan, too, is safe. The dogs have not come near us yet.” His voice went a bit dry. “Perhaps our land being difficult to traverse has saved us.”

Some cats tittered at this.

“We have kept watch on ThunderClan’s territory, as promised,” he went on, speaking to Bluestar now. “The humans seem to have finally let the forest be. What we can see is burnt, but I imagine the snow has killed the embers.”

Bluestar said nothing. She lifted her head a little, her eyes clouded and her jaw slightly twitching like she was trying to think of something.

Blackstar, like Crookedstar, waited a moment, then cleared his throat awkwardly and turned to Rookstar.

The tall tom took the cue and stood now as Blackstar sat down. “No one’s died, but the dogs were scented on our territory.” Hisses and growls, which Rookstar waited to die down before continuing. “They were close to the Barn shortly before some allies confirmed seeing them near our rites site.”

“What’s a ‘rites site’?” Fireheart whispered to Wrenwhisker.

Wrenwhisker sniffed. “Gentle way to say ‘carrefour’. We bring our dead there to be eaten by other animals.”

“Barbarians,” Darkstripe muttered close by.

Wrenwhisker didn’t react.

Fireheart couldn’t blame Darkstripe for that response; the idea of dumping a friend’s corpse in front of a fox or buzzard to be eaten was instantly appalling.

Then again, RiverClan just sends them down the river, don’t they? And we bury. Fireheart mulled this over for a moment as Rookstar talked about the weather. I mean, I guess you have to get rid of a body no matter where you live. At least it’s not going to waste, right? I wonder what ShadowClan does…

“That’s our news,” Rookstar said, then hesitated as he looked at Bluestar. “If you—”

“ThunderClan—” Bluestar’s head shot up straight and she stood up sharply. “ThunderClan is going home. To the forest.”

This set off a round of surprised responses, most of all from the ThunderClanners. Fireheart looked at Ravenwing, who had just turned to him in confusion.

“When did we talk about that?” Ravenwing whispered.

Fireheart shook his head. “We didn’t.”

Blackstar was the one to break the silence of the leaders. “You have already checked the forest to ensure its safeness? We did not see any of your Clan—”

“Ah, that– that—” Bluestar violently shook her head. The cloudiness didn’t go away. “We’ll do that tomorrow. ThunderClan thanks WindClan for their kindness. For letting us stay in the Barn.”

Rookstar’s response was halting. “Least we could do.”

Bluestar didn’t look his way. “That was all of us? Yes. Then this is over.”

She jumped down from the boulder, leaving the baffled leaders behind. Fireheart bobbed his head respectfully to Wrenwhisker before weaving through the crowd at a trot, joining Speckletail as she intercepted Bluestar.

“Where are you going?” Speckletail hissed. She had a face like she was trying not to be mortified, but was failing.

Bluestar blinked stupidly. “Home.”

“Oh—” Fireheart ducked in, patting Bluestar to get her to look at him. “We aren’t going to the forest yet. We’ve still got to check it before we leave the Barn.”

To his relief, Bluestar’s eyes cleared a little as they met his. Slowly, she nodded, coughed softly and turned to Speckletail, saying, “Gather our Clanmates. We must go back quickly.” Without waiting for a response, she started off in the opposite direction, going around the gathered crowd.

“What’s wrong with her?” someone whispered as ThunderClan slowly pulled out of the group to follow her. “Is she sick?”

“Been sick for a long time, if it’s that,” their conversation partner whispered back. “She was off last time, too, remember?”

“She’s fine,” Speckletail said to them, a little too loudly.

“Thank you for the concern,” Fireheart added with an apologetic headbob.

Fireheart and Speckletail hurried after Bluestar, catching up to their party and leaving the rest of the Clans behind to watch them go.

“Ridiculous,” Darkstripe growled almost under his breath. “We should’ve had Speckletail come instead, if Bluestar’s just going to embarrass us like this.”

“That’s enough,” Speckletail said curtly.

Darkstripe glared at the ground again, but kept his mouth shut.

The apprentices were at the back of the party, looking confused but overall optimistic.

Fireheart slowed down to walk with them, eager to ease things. “How did you like your first Gathering?”

“Oh, it was so cool!” Brightpaw burst out. “We met a RiverClan cat, and a ShadowClan cat, and—”

“And they’re so little!” Brackenpaw added cheerfully. “They look like kits. Do they get enough to eat?”

“Life for them is hard,” Fireheart said, a pang of sympathy in his heart. “They don’t eat as well or as much as we do. But they do their best.”

Brackenpaw nodded thoughtfully. “Well, they were really nice. And the RiverClan cat was this, like, patched cat, and they said they’re a ‘jack’? Whatever that is?”

“Oh, I can answer that,” Ravenwing said, also slowing down. “See, some cats don’t go for being a tom or molly, so they’re called ‘jacks’, and…”

Fireheart tried to listen, but his eyes went to Bluestar and latched on. Her head was hanging again, and, he noticed with some dread, even her fur was limp. Her tail barely drifted above the ground.

At least she’s eating, Fireheart thought, eyeing her somewhat rounded sides. At least there’s that.

That was all he had to hold on to.  

[daggermeli]

Tease

(Husband!Choso X Reader)

Warning: Smut 🔞

-------------------------------------------------------

You walked through the front door of your apartment. A fiery aura emitting from you. Behind you, your tease of a husband trailing behind, smiling to himself about the stunt he pulled earlier.

*4 hours ago*

It was the 4th annual Jujutsu Tech Social event. An event where all the famous names of the jujutsu world come together, discussing business and plans for the future.

This year you were forced to go, as the current head of the L/N clan. Your plus one being your charming as ever husband, Choso kamo. You arrived at the event in style, in a black Mercedes and with a beautiful dress and jewelry to match.

Upon entering the event, you both received many looks. Whether it be due to your appearance, the presence of the Kamo clan, or the fact that the two of you are newly weds, it didn't matter. The attention made you feel like the most gorgeous being on this planet, and it showed through the aura you displayed.

Throughout the night the two of you danced, laughed, and drank, enjoying each others company. But of course, being the tease he is, he loved to push his luck, especially in a room full of people.

He knew exactly what he was doing. He started by gently caressing the small of your back as he held you close. He moved his hand slowly down your body, stopping to grab and squeeze your ass. You were taken by surprise at the bold action, but played it off.

As the night went on, he didn't stop there. He kept touching you, groping you, even kissing you on the cheek in public. You thought you had gotten used to it until his actions became more sexual. He was getting too handsy and touchy, and it was becoming more apparent that he was turned on.

It was obvious. You could see the bulge in his pants, and feel his growing length on your backside. His hands would find themselves roaming your body, groping any exposed skin they could get to. You had enough.

"Oh, Y/N! How are you?" A man named Suguru Geto greeted, approaching you and Choso.

"I'm doing good! It's so nice to see you." You responded, putting on a friendly face.

Choso, however, didn't share the same sentiments. He was glaring daggers into the other male, not liking the fact that he's speaking to his wife. He's always been possessive, and the fact that he's the most attractive man at this event isn't helping.

"How's married life treating you?"

"It's been great so far, I can't complain." You smiled, trying to keep a conversation going.

"You know, if you're ever looking for something a bit more exciting, my doors are always open."

It was almost as if Choso was on autopilot, as he immediately stepped in between you and the man. He stood with his back facing you, his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"Excuse me?" Choso questioned.

"I just thought I'd let her know."

"Well, she's not interested." Choso interjected.

"Oh really? How would you know?" Geto challenged.

"Because I'm her husband, and we're leaving." Choso stated before turning towards you.

"Goodbye Suguru." You said, walking away from the interaction.

*Back to present*

The moment the two of you arrived home, you slammed the door and locked it.

"What the fuck was that Choso?!" You yelled.

"He was flirting with you You know!"

"It was harmless! I'm not even interested in him, not to mention I'm married!"

"It doesn't matter. Men are dogs, all of them"

"All men? Even you?"

"Especially Me"

"Well maybe if you weren't being such a fucking tease at the event, I would've been able to stop that from happening!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He smirked.

"You're unbelievable!" You scoffed.

"I think I'm very believable."

He replied, a smirk still present on his face.

He stepped towards you, backing you up against the wall.

"I don't know what you're trying to do here, but you need to stop."

You warned, crossing your arms.

"Do what, love?"

"You've been teasing me all night, and now this? You're really playing with fire, aren't you?"

"I'd be happy to get burned." He chuckled.

You grabbed his chin, forcing him to look up at you.

"You know, I could end you right here and now."

"Do it."

"What?"

"Go ahead, end me." He taunted, a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Is that what you want?"

"Maybe. Or maybe I want something else."

"And what is that?"

"I want you. I want to watch your demeanor change as you succumb to your desire for me. I want to hear those sweet sounds as I touch you in the ways only I know how. And finally, I want to watch as I ruin you, as I take the thing you hold dearest. You're mine and mine alone, and I want everyone to know."

Your lips crashed onto his. His words went straight to your core, igniting the fire you felt for him. You could feel his cock twitch at the feeling of your lips.

The kiss was desperate and passionate, the two of you fighting for dominance. His tongue entered your mouth, dancing with yours.

His hands were grabbing at your body, touching any exposed skin they could reach.

His hand slipped under your dress, moving your panties aside. He ran his fingers along your slick folds, a groan escaping his throat.

"Fuck, you're so wet for me already. I'm the only one that can do this to you, aren't I?" He asked, his voice low and raspy.

"Mhm." You nodded.

"Use your words, princess."

"Yes. Yes, you are the only one who can do this."

You confirmed, feeling his fingers graze your clit.

"Good girl. I'm the only one who can fuck you like this."

"Please. I want you so bad." You moaned.

"What do you want me to do? Tell me, and I'll give it to you."

"I want you to fuck me. Please, Choso, I need you inside of me."

He quickly picked you up and threw you over his shoulder, carrying you to the bedroom. He threw you on the bed, immediately crawling on top of you. He ripped off his shirt and jacket, throwing them across the room.

He kissed you once more, his lips attacking yours with urgency. He trailed his lips down your neck, leaving wet kisses in their path. His hands were all over your body, squeezing and caressing every inch of your skin.

His lips found their way to the tops of your breasts, sucking and nipping at the soft skin. He pulled your dress down, your breasts bouncing free. He wrapped his lips around your nipple, sucking and licking it.

His hand traveled down to your underwear, rubbing slow circles on your clit. You let out a gasp, the sudden feeling of his finger against your clothed clit surprising you.

"Mmm, you're so wet."

"Only for you." You replied, your head rolling back.

He continued his assault on your breast, while his hand slipped under your panties, running his fingers along your dripping cunt. He pushed a finger into your pussy, earning a moan from you.

"Oh god." You groaned, your fingers tangling themselves in his hair.

"You're so wet for me, fuck. Can't wait to bury myself in your tight pussy."

"Please, I want to feel you."

"Don't worry, you will. Soon."

He pulled his fingers out of you, making a show of licking them clean.

"You taste so good, love. But I'm sure you taste better down here." He said, a devilish smile on his face.

He took your panties and removed them, tossing them somewhere in the room. He settled himself between your legs, spreading them wide.

"Look at you, already so ready for me. Your pussy is dripping."

"Choso, please."

"Don't worry, love. I've got you."

He dove right in, latching his lips onto your clit. Your body reacted immediately, your back arching off the bed.

"Oh shit."

"You like that?"

"Yes, so much."

"Such a pretty pussy."

"You're so good with your mouth."

"You like when I eat your pussy?"

"God, yes. Fuck, I'm close."

"You're close already? What a good girl, cumming on my tongue. Go ahead, love. Cum on my tongue."

"Mmm, yes."

"Come on, I know you can do it. Cum on my tongue."

That was it. That's what made you unravel, your orgasm washing over you.

"Good girl. You did so well for me."

"Thank you. Now, please fuck me."

"Anything for my beautiful wife."

"Please, Choso. I need you."

"Don't worry, I'll give it to you. I'm going to wreck you."

He pulled his cock out, stroking himself as he admired you. You looked beautiful, a mess from his touches and kisses. He could tell you were eager to get fucked, the look on your face said it all.

"Fuck, you're so pretty." He muttered.

"Choso, please."

"Be patient, love. You'll get what you want soon enough."

He aligned himself with your entrance, the head of his cock prodding at your slick folds.

"I'm gonna make you feel so good."

"I know you will."

He thrust himself into you, your walls squeezing his cock.

"Oh my god." You moaned, the feeling of his cock filling you up overwhelming you.

"Fuck, youre so tight."

"You feel so good inside of me."

"Shit, and you're taking me so well. Such a good girl."

He began to thrust his hips, setting a fast and rough pace.

"You're so pretty when I'm fucking you."

"Mmm, keep going."

"Oh yeah, you love it, don't you?"

"Yes, I love it so much."

"Who fucks you better than me?"

"Nobody."

"And who do you belong to?"

"You. You, Choso."

"Good girl. My good girl. You're mine, aren't you?"

"I'm all yours. All yours."

"Mmm, all mine."

"So deep." You whined, your legs shaking as he fucked you.

"Your pussy's swallowing me whole."

"So big, you're so big."

"That's it, say my name. Tell the whole neighborhood whose fucking you."

"Ahh, Choso." You moan out as you both release.

"Fuck, you're amazing."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Next time, try not to be such a dick, ok?"

"No promises. I just can't help it, I can't control myself when it comes to you. Besides, seeing the angry look on your face is so hot."

"Choso." You groaned, lightly slapping him.

-------------------------------------------------------

Cross Post From My Wattpad: @Levi_and_Chosos_wife

[koumeowkami]

🪐 no celestial ; kanallen

— chapter seven

"Kanata was a poor little angel that heaven couldn't help. He'd always been a tough one, not trusting anyone but his little brother Nayuta, the only person that ever made him feel love. Growing up by themselves, he did everything in his power to protect his sick brother, things that dirtied his holy hands. "It's for a good cause though", he thought. But it wasn't enough, and Nayuta died soon after.

Kanata's soul was completely spent. He became unable to feel love, and adding to his dirty dealings that soon were found out, he got cast out of heaven. Fallen on Earth with his wings blackened, he felt so lost and empty he thought he could've just died.

But a random encounter with a very annoying, persistent, stupid redhead human boy would've made him discover love again."

2889 words

genre: supernatural, hurt/comfort, angst

warnings: none

previous ✧ next

Allen stood there, his jaw dropped. Before them, the smoke slowly dissipated, revealing two figures, both with black horns, bat wings and a pointed tail.

Demons.

The boy felt lightheaded for a moment, trying to take everything in. If angels were real, of course demons were as well. But when he looked over to where Kanata was standing, the other looked pretty much at ease, his face impassible. Weren't they supposed to be enemies? Why did the angel know them already and even looked close?

"Hey there, Kanata! Ya seem to be makin' human friends!" one of the demons, who wore traditional clothing and was adorned in a bunch of golden accessories, teased him as if he was talking to an old friend of his. He strode across the room, the sound of his geta echoing, followed by his muscular companion. He stopped right in front of Kanata. The white haired boy's expression shifted to a visibly annoyed one, arms crossed, muttering a small "we ain't friends" that only made the man grin.

"Ah excuse me kiddo... we haven't introduced ourselves yet" he turned to Allen with a smile, "I'm Iori Suiseki 'n I lead one of the demonic clans in Hell. This buff guy behind me is Zen" he pointed to the tall man, who despite the huge appearance had soft eyes.

"Kanata-kun!! You look like you've gotten a lot better, I'm glad!" Zen walked straight to the angel's face, being all cheerful with him.

"Don't be so close... ugh, you're so damn noisy" Kanata grimaced, taking a step behind, "Ignore 'em, Suzaku. So, why are you here?"

"Everybody in Hell and Heaven heard all that noise ya made earlier, y'know?"

Iori turned back to Kanata, looking at him straight in the eye. His face was unreadable, but Allen could feel that there was something more implied behind those words. The well masked worry of the man made Allen listen intently, being himself on edge after seeing what happened to the angel.

Kanata just tsked, his eyes empty.

"So what? I don't remember y'all being my caregivers or somethin' like that. There's nothin' else we need to tell each other anymore."

Anymore? Allen wondered if something else had happened prior to Kanata falling. Why did he have business with demons? Was that the reason why he fell? He wanted to know more of him so badly, but he knew having to wait for the boy to say something was probably for the best.

"Aw, why are ya bein' so detached with us, now? Is the fact we wanna help you a bit that bad?" The demon said over-dramatically, pretending to sob, "Ya see, you and us... we ain't that different."

Zen got once again close to Iori, whispering in his ear if that was "the right moment to tell him" ; the man just looked at him back. Thankfully, Kanata didn't hear that, but nonetheless his patience started wearing thin by each second that passed.

"... Are you tryna hide somethin' from me, Suiseki-san?" the boy spat, looking into him. No matter how polite he had to be with that man, he couldn't hide the urgency in his tone.

"Not at all. I'm here to tell ya everythin' you gotta know, in fact."

"Hah?"

"Kanata, you don't know who your father is, am I right?"

"I don't... but what has that to do with–"

"I always gotta keep track of the people who work for me, so I made sure to do some research on ya..." Iori interrupted Kanata, still smiling even though his eyes weren't, "I always knew ya were a special kid, y'know?"

"... What does this mean?!" Kanata's eyes started to waver, as he couldn't bear to look at the man in the eyes anymore. His gaze shifted, and Allen felt the angel's eyes on him for a second, probably in search of something that could calm him down.

"Kanata, you and your brother were born from an angel... and a demon."

Half angel, half demon. Kanata looked down, his heart hammering in his chest. Suddenly everything made sense: Nayuta and him receiving the snake earrings when they were children, them being isolated from the other angels because they were scared of the twins' aura, their shitty mother wanting to get rid of them and calling them a mistake... all of it was because of their father. He felt dizzy.

"This... this can't be..." he uttered in a shaky tone, keeping his head low.

"Oh really? I'm sure you've always believed it, deeply in your heart."

Tsk. That damn demon was right. The beauty of temptation had been plaguing his mind since long ago, staining his heart more and more. The purity of angels had always been a dream to him. When he looked at Suiseki again, he understood the similarity: his gelid gaze was as wild as the demons' fiery one, no room for innocence.

"Now, your angel-demon nature makes things hard for ya." the demon started, his expression serious but soft, "You've fallen, so your demonic powers are finally surfacin'..."

"My... demonic powers?"

"That's right. You've always had them, but your angel side made sure to suppress them..." Muscles intervened, worry evident in his tone, "Now that you're a fallen angel, they're coming back to you in an enhanced form."

"So... that outburst of energy that happened earlier was..."

"Demonic power takin' over ya, yeah. If ya don't learn to keep your feelings at bay and control it... you might cause a real mess."

"And at that point, guards will bring you to Hell."

Head in hands, Kanata tried to digest all the things the demons were telling him. Hell, he didn't even know he had powers, let alone destructive ones. Although he didn't mind being associated with that other reality, as he felt close to it more than he had ever felt with Heaven's side, he didn't want to go to Hell, nor he wanted to harm anyone. No more of that. He had already caused so much pain in the past. His initial thoughts about dying were surfacing again, thinking that maybe he really did deserve to disappear, after all. All of this happening to him was only further proof of the curse he was bearing.

"I'm not gonna let that happen to you!!"

Kanata and the demons turned to the redhead, who hadn't said anything until that very moment. The boy looked as devastated as someone who had received the news of a parent passing away, and Kanata's heart hurt at that sight. Oh, how much he hated to be pitied. Angry tears prickled his eyes, but he managed to fight them for now.

"Oh boy, your human friend looks like he doesn't want ya to go at all~" Suiseki was teasing him again, trying to lighten up the mood a bit.

The other boy immediately panicked, having spoken out of place accidentally, "Uh... I'm sorry to interrupt you. But yes, I... I wouldn't want anything to happen to him, ever." he composed himself again, speaking firmly.

"God... shut up." Kanata murmured in a pout, but apparently everyone else still heard him, considering how amused Suiseki looked. The demon hummed happily, enjoying Kanata's slightly distressed expression.

What was so funny about it?

Suiseki turned to Suzaku again and got closer, putting a hand on the boy's shoulder, "I'll make sure nothin' ever happens to him." he reassured the redhead.

"... Hah? Wouldn't I be more useful to you if I were in Hell?"

"Ya ain't wrong, but I know it's not what ya want. You've suffered enough."

While Kanata furrowed his brows in confusion, asking himself what he did to receive such kindness from a stupid demon, Suiseki snapped his fingers, summoning three other figures: one was tall, with curly green hair and kind eyes; another one had orange hair and the demeanor of a little delinquent; the shortest one had pink hair and looked particularly annoying. They all wore tattoos and golden jewelry that stood out in contrast to the dark appearance of demons, exactly like Suiseki. Kanata thought they were also part of his clan, even though he never saw them back when he used to do jobs for the demon.

"Here they are! Hokusai, Satsuki and Reo are gonna watch over ya and teach ya a thing or two on how to control your powers." the leader proudly pointed at each one of them in the order in which they appeared.

"Ugh, that's booooring~ I don't like staying here on Earth!" the pink haired boy, Reo, whined so loudly he immediately got on Kanata's nerves. No one seemed to mind his tantrum though, being probably used to it.

"Shaddup, you brat! We gotta follow Aniki's orders!" the orange bastard, Satsuki, started arguing with the pink gremlin going on a rampage about values and helping people in need, the other guy seemingly uninterested in it. Again, no one questioned their behavior.

"Stop fighting... helping this boy is important, remember?" the gentle giant, Hokusai, spoke in a voice so low it was barely audible, and yet his tender smile was enough to make his younger companions stop. Kanata even doubted that could be classified as an "evil being".

The redhead, who had been standing close to Kanata the whole time, turned to him. "Are these... really demons?" he asked, confusion laced in his voice.

"Considerin' how noisy they are... yeah." the angel facepalmed at the chaotic sight in front of him, not sure if that was really a gift from Suiseki, or only something that could've made him go insane sooner. Suzaku giggled at that response.

"Oi! We're here for ya, y'know? You could be a bit more grateful!!" Satsuki stomped towards them, pointing at Kanata with his best intimidating expression. Kanata wasn't impressed.

"I don't need any of y'all annoyin' ass demons." he replied flatly, distancing himself from the orange haired guy. He could hear the other's overly exaggerated "HAAAH?!" behind him but he ignored it.

"Come on, Kanata-kun... I promise they'll get better." Muscles readily reassured him, noticing how frustrated the angel looked, being surrounded by so many people all at once. Suiseki joined in the conversation too, wrapping his arm around Kanata's shoulder. "I'm sure all of you guys will become friends in no time!" he flashed the boy a smile, even though the latter wasn't really sure about it, nor he was enthusiastic about spending time with them. If anything, the mere thought of it gave him a headache.

"I'm counting on ya, alright?" the demon turned to his little brothers, who gave a firm nod.

"Yeah, Aniki! Leave it to us!"

And with that, Suiseki and Muscles disappeared in a black smoke.

The demon trio approached the other boys again, their aura incredibly strong. They looked friendly, too friendly for Kanata's taste. Was he only able to attract annoying people he wanted nothing to do with?

"Mm... we're also going, now." Gentle Giant spoke first, smiling kindly at him and Suzaku, "We live not too far from here."

Orange Bastard got again too close for comfort, a confident smirk on his face. "Yeah! Just call us whenever ya need help and we'll rush to ya!"

"I said I don't– ...whatever." Kanata sighed in defeat, making the redhead giggle silently once more. This time though, the angel turned to him with threatening eyes, his cue for the other guy to quit laughing, or else.

The last one to speak was Pink Gremlin, waving his hand, "We'll talk a lot more next time! See you~"

The room fell silent after their disappearance. Kanata finally breathed out as tension left his body, so damn exhausted after all he went through in just a day. He felt weird about that entire situation, about Suzaku standing up for him despite having learned how dangerous he was, how much of a monster was. Glancing at the boy, he looked as shaken as Kanata was, but his eyes were shining with determination. He was really not going to give up anytime soon, huh.

"I'm gonna lay down for a bit. My head hurts." he simply said emotionlessly. The redhead looked at him, eyes softening sympathetically.

"I'm gonna heat some food up so we can eat later, okay?"

The boy was met with no reply as Kanata just disappeared in his room. Sinking in the messy red sheets, he closed his eyes and tried to rest, but his thoughts just couldn't leave him alone for not even a moment. He thought about his conversation with Suiseki, how he helped him without asking for a repayment, how he even sent his own little brothers to help the poor angel in distress. Being cared for, unconditionally... it was something Kanata had experienced only with Nayuta, his one and only family. No protection ever received from the woman he could hardly call a "mother"; if anything, she was the very person who had thrown them to the snakes.

His mind wandered again, remembering Suiseki calling him and Suzaku "friends". Was that how they really looked like? He thought it was pretty much clear that he couldn't stand the redhead's ass, although... maybe something between them was a bit different now, as if some chemical effect was slowly taking place. Heat rose up to his cheeks, as he grumbled to himself while hugging his pillow in a pout.

Dinner time came and went, still no trace of Pink Hair and Mushroom-head returning. The two boys sat on their bed, their backs pressed against the headboard, enjoying for once a comfortable silence.

It didn't last long, as the angel felt the boy beside him shifting a little bit so he could look at him.

"Kanata... are you okay?"

Kanata hummed, hugging his knees. It was time. He couldn't keep this secret, this burden in his heart any longer. He then took a deep breath, turning to the redhead.

"... You've heard it from Suiseki-san, right? That I used to have a twin brother called Nayuta."

"Used to...?"

"He was sick and died some time ago."

The other shivered visibly, looking down. The angel saw him listening intently, not uttering a single word. He continued.

"It's my fault, all of it. It's cause I'm an abomination. I was a horrible brother, a horrible son... and I couldn't even keep my promise to find a cure for him, despite working hard for Suiseki-san."

Kanata dug his nails into the uncovered flesh of his legs, leaving slight marks behind. Suzaku rushed to stop him from hurting himself any longer, grabbing his wrists. Their hands touched for a mere second, the redhead's slender fingers wrapping around the angel's calloused ones.

"You're not an abomination." the guy started, his eyes wavering, "I'm sure you did your best for your brother... he's proud of you."

Kanata laughed bitterly, staring at his feet as he shook his head, speaking more and more frantically.

"That's bullshit. It wasn't enough. I should've worked harder for him... I should've been a good boy like him... I should've died, after all–"

"Stop! Stop saying that!"

The redhead yelled and hugged him, on the verge of tears. He sobbed quietly, hiding his face in the crook of the angel's neck. The latter was completely taken off guard, stilling in the other boy's embrace. He's never been this close to another human being before and he didn't know what to do, but he felt oddly comfortable: his body immediately reacted, warmth spreading everywhere.

"... W-why are you cryin' for me?" Kanata stuttered, trying his best to not sound affected by the weird feeling in his stomach, "I'm a monster. There's somethin' inside of me that is deadly... why don't you get I could kill ya?"

Suzaku sniffled like a kid, raising his head so he could look at the angel in the eyes, "You won't, I'm sure of it. Look, you're worrying about me now..."

"I'm not– ugh, nevermind... get yourself off of me right now."

Kanata pushed against Suzaku's chest a bit as the latter broke the hug, wiping some tears that had spilled away, blushing just slightly. The white haired boy gave him an impassibile look.

"Look at ya, cryin' like a baby... you're pathetic."

"You're also crying, though..."

The redhead pointed at Kanata's face, a single tear falling down. His eyes widened when he felt his hand slightly wet after touching his own cheek. His emotions were all over the place now, spilling out more and more as the other guy kept on breaking the cage that contained his heart. That was the first time he was letting himself be vulnerable.

After the guy went back to his side of the bed, he gave one last glance to the angel, looking dead serious. "Kanata... I'm not going anywhere."

"Mm?"

"I won't leave you alone, no matter what. I'll do my best to make you happy."

"Shut up, I'm gonna vomit."

Kanata immediately laid down to sleep, hiding his face from the redhead, who was laughing softly. What the hell was wrong with him, saying that sorta cheesy stuff out of the blue? As he kept mentally cursing the other guy, he didn't realize he was blushing again, feeling once more that something in his stomach that was both weird and incredibly pleasing.

It felt so good, he wanted to drown in it.

[sapphic-catz]

I don’t want to like hijack @spotty-is-too-sleepy ‘s inbox lol but his TigerJake au has suddenly like captured my mind so um have my own take on it :)

Anyway I see them as like first meeting when both were pretty young cats. Tiger is being treated terribly by his mentor and stuck between becoming the cat Thistleclaw wants him to be and hating himself for being like him. He one night attempts to flee and ends up finding Jake, a cat similar his age that’s just so carefree and happy. From Jake’s view he’s met this like super buff mysterious stranger cat who smells like the forest and is def has the hots for him immediately, while Tiger is a bit drawn back but is also pretty quickly falling for the ginger kitty

(Kinda like canon TallJake except yknow between these two and Jake is made to be the same age as Tiger)!

The two don’t formally put a name on it but Tiger thinks they’re officially together while Jake would more call it talking?

Anyways um ofc Tiger has to go back and he is immediately found by his mentor who is furious. Esp as he can smell the kittypet on his apprentice’s pelt. The two are separated for a long time until Tiger has just gotten his name, Tigerclaw after his own claws (but he kinda has suspicions his mentor orchestrated them to share a suffix)

He goes on a lone night patrol and guess who he meets. Jake. The two are right back to where they first met. Jake is his same silly, lighthearted tease while Tiger is drawn back but loving.

They start right back where they were before.

[read more bc this is so long sorryyyyyy)

After like a few moons of sneaking off to see his boyfriend he finally gets caught, by Thistleclaw none the less. He is forced by his old mentor to break up what he has with Jake and Tiger has to. He feels like he has to. He has been selfish and sneaky, breaking the code to see some pet (these are his thoughts sadly). He goes to Jake and tries to speak first but is stopped by-

Jake saying he’s expecting. Expecting Tigerclaw’s kits.

Tiger is horrified and freaking out bc no no no no no while Jake is just staring at him confused. They love each other right? And now Tiger can come with him and they can raise their family together!

The two break up from the fight. But Jake says very clearly that he is not going to raise these kits. Tiger would have to either change his mind or, take them himself.

Even more panicking as Tiger tries so hard to find a way to somehow convince Jake to keep them or how he could take them. He can’t just waltz in with kits!! But as if a gift from the stars, Goldenflower announces she’s expecting. With no other parent…

He pulls her aside and tells her the situation he’s in hopefully to see if she’d agree and luckily she does. Because she’s in the same one lol (the sire to her litter is a kittypet). The two make the plan for Tiger to sneak his kits in the litter as Golden has hers. They’d be raised by the two and appear as full Thunder kittens. Its announced not only their official partnership as mates but also that Tiger is the dad to her litter. Now he just has to wait.

Eventually the time comes and he disappears to try and find Jake with his kits. He finds them and Jake just coldly shoves the two babies at him. Tiger wishes for the love they used to have but. He can’t amend it now.

He’s carefully making it back when he’s stopped. By Thistleclaw. He should’ve been more careful in his tracks. Thistle screams that he’s not only back with that pet but also now bringing back little pests the clan will have to feed!!! It’s real dramatic and as Tiger tries to bite back, Thistle leaps to grab one of the kits. Without thinking Tiger just smacks him back, claws drawn, all the force he can. Thistle is thrown back but too hard, smashing his head on a rock. Tiger is horrified but he can’t keep his kits outside any longer. He cleans Thistle enough to hide his own scent then finally sneaks them back.

Goldenflower has two kits of her own, Lynxkit and Swiftkit she calls them. She feigns another birth as he shuffles his own in the litter. All together they have Lynxkit, Swiftkit, Ravenkit (Scourge), and Leopardkit (Ruby). Lynx dies sadly a week after but the rest make it through. Ravenkit was named after his dark pelt while Leopardkit was after his mom. (Also is matching. Two cat names with Two bird names)

So!

Ravenkit kinda fills the role of Ravenpaw except they still become Scourge. Opposite of Fire arc as he started as a clan cat that then became a kittypet.

He as a apprentice witnesses the killing of Oakheart and then his siblings (Leopardpaw and Swiftpaw are both killed by the dogs). He learns that it was his own dad who set up the trap and runs away. They end up being taken in by Brick and Bone who run a scrappy group of strays. Once he starts working it they become Bloodclan and they kill Tiger in revenge for his siblings but also as a show of what the clans create, monsters.

Fire though. Rusty is instead the slightly younger half sibling of Raven/Scourge via Jake who had him in a fling. Him along with Princess weren’t cared for the best but he did most love the stories he was told by Jake about the woods. Sorta Cloudtail style, Tigerclaw stumbles into Jake and as a “gift” (more begging to plz plz plz take this kit off my paws I cannot raise him) he’s given to the cat. He’s then trained by Tiger, sees the bad his mentor is, helps then Ravenpaw escape, and eventually becomes the Fire we all know and love :)

He kept his name tho and is called Rustyfire. Doesn’t become leader but Sandstar does! He’s mostly a advisor/dad/deputy. Kinda takes a role of both being the deputy but also a camp caretaker and sometimes a medic since he picked up a lot of herbs

A few more brief notes I’ve had lol

Jake is pretty explicitly a bad dad. He just isn’t a cat who can take care of kits so he’s kinda dumped every litter away. Princess is taken soon after Rusty leaves to live in her own forever home. He loves them but more in a uncle kind of way. Not good for them clearly

Raven/Scourge is really just Scourge except with the arc of Ravenpaw. Their a very cold cat that’s incredibly watchful. It’s said they have eyes on the back of their head (if I drew him I’d draw him as a all black cat with the tiger eye ears thingy)

Goldenflower raised all the kits like her own and was hurt so badly by the death of two of them. Even more when her final baby disappeared. Luckily Fire had enough insight to like pull her aside and tell her what happened. She knows what Tiger’s done and also that her baby raven is safer now.

In the final battle Scourge kills Tiger and instead of the Bloodclan/Tigerclan alliance it was Bloodclan/Lionclan. The ending fight is between the cats still loyal to Tiger and Leopard and the ones against it. Eventually it ends in the death of Leopardstar along with most of her loyal fighters. A lot more death. Mistystar takes power and in Shadowclan Russetstar rises (Blackfoot died in the fight)

Fire and Sand are together but in a platonic way :) they still have Squilf and Leaf

Bramble and Tawny are now one cat called Thornflower who was the actual kit between GoldenTiger. She initially followed his dad but turned against him and joined back. Him and Squilf are never together, older sibling vibes ONLY

Scourge takes Bloodclan back to the town but they keep a close alliance. It soon after is renamed to the Blood Band (yes it is a joke on them being a metal band)

[moni-harmonia]

Kaeya's Hangout - Other routes

For the Winery Routes click here

So, let's talk about the rest of the Hangout and some final thoughts!

First I did the Liyue route. This one is probably my least favorite, but it was fun nonetheless, just a bit long.

I liked Kaeya's story with Captain Wu. I mean, that part when he explained that Diluc almost killed him because he thought he was a pervert was so good lol

And then we got to see some of Kaeya's trickery. I love how he dislikes so much that people notice he wants to help, that he says we're the ones who want to help the guy lol

Also I loved how Kaeya's fake name was Albert Rich. Very sneaky 😂

Overall it was a fun excursion, and we got to see some of Kaeya's influence outside of Mond.

Next, I did the other one in Mond where we help Sister Grace. I love when we can see Kaeya and Venti talking to each other. It's so fun because it's so obvious that Kaeya knows he's Barbatos, like, he's basically saying it indirectly all the time lol

Also I liked the small reference to the first Windblume event. I loved the romantic poem plot that we got, it was so fun. I like when they make those references.

And I loved the part at the end where Kaeya's trying to come up with a very long excuse just because he doesn't want to sing 😂

Oh, how I feel that... I love singing but I'm embarrassed to do it in front of other people.

This one was also just a fun excursion, not much to talk about. Just another time where Kaeya says he's going to relax but ends up helping people, that's just how he is.

The picture is very cute though 🥰

Then we have the final one in Sumeru. This one was also a bit short but it had a very interesting moment.

Kaeya finds an excuse to put his new skin on, and I love that it was made to be a bandit, but it passes as a prince too. Even a lady there was like "Oh my god, is he a true prince??!". Yeah very smart of you Hoyo, I see what you did there!

Before this, Kaeya was pondering on the story of the play. He questions the importance of one's origin. He says that one cannot choose their origins, but their origins will limit their life decisions.

Of course, this is about his own life. His origins as a Khaenri'ahn, and how that's going to be always present in his life.

And then during the play, Kaeya, playing as a prince who has been living outside their homeland, and whose father wants to conquer other lands, decides to improvise.

He wants to challenge his fate. He doesn't want to follow his father. He wants to stay far from home. The play talks about how the prince stayed far from home as if it was a tragedy, but Kaeya phrased it as not being a tragedy, but as something that the prince chooses himself because that's how he wants to act, and that he's at peace with his decision.

It's very obvious how Kaeya was relating this tale to his own. He doesn't want conflict, he wants to live in peace.

Of course, we still don't have enough context of his Clan, what his father wanted and what will happen in the future. But this made us have a perspective on how Kaeya feels. He wants to choose his own destiny.

A brief but interesting path this was.

Overall, this hangout was fantastic. I think it could have been better. I wish there had been a story in Angel's Share because that's another important place in Kaeya's life. I wanted to see Rosaria too, and I wish the Knights had appeared a bit more.

But I was very satisfied with the content we got in the Winery, and the other paths had their own interesting and fun moments as well.

I'm very biased of course, but this was my favorite hangout. I liked Kaveh's too but there were some paths there that I didn't enjoy, here I enjoyed almost everything.

It was worth the wait, and I'm happy that our boy has gotten so much this update. He deserves the world and I can't wait to see him again.

I hope we get some Diluc love soon as well since he has been very absent lately and he didn't have a lot of content here. I wish we could have gotten a pic with the bros 😔 Some day...

[talonslockau]

Forest of Secrets - Chapter 6

Chapter 5 || Index || Chapter 7

“Where have you two been?”

Fireheart was just dropping his kill on the pile when he heard the furious rumble of Tigerclaw behind him. Turning around, he looked up to the treacherous deputy’s amber gaze with a polite smile. “Hunting, of course. Did Graystripe not tell you?”

The tabby’s glare narrowed. “He did.” The ginger tom forced himself not to cower under the other’s growl. “But he also said that you were going after a rabbit warren. That hardly looks like a rabbit to me.” He pointed one long, razor-sharp claw out at the mole that Fireheart had laid in the freshkill pile.

“It ended up being stale. Another patrol must have gotten to it first.” Peppermask mewed as she added her own kills to the pile. “We didn’t want to return empty-pawed, of course, so we kept hunting. The Clan needs freshkill now more than ever, after all.” She turned to Tigerclaw with an equally polite smile. “Isn’t that what you keep saying?”

His face twisted into a snarl at her words. “That doesn’t mean you can just go cavorting around doing whatever pleases you! You need to have respect for your Clan, and your deputy-”

“Tigerclaw.” They both startled as Bluestar interrupted them, sliding past the lichen strands of her den to interject in their conversation. “They have done well taking initiative to feed the Clan. They informed us of their whereabouts through Graystripe, and as you surely know, the health of the Clan is what matters above all else.”

“Yes, well-” The leader’s sudden appearance had removed Tigerclaw’s authority in the situation, and he scowled at the realization. “See to it that it doesn’t happen again.” He spat at the two young warriors before whirling around and stalking away across camp.

Bluestar watched him leave with a bemused expression before turning to the two warriors. “Of course, I expect both of you to still perform your duties today to your fullest ability.”

“We will, Bluestar.” Fireheart replied with a respectful dip of his head. “But I must see Yellowfang first. I got a thorn stuck in my paw, and even Peppermask couldn’t get it out…”

The silver queen stifled an obvious sigh. “Of course. Go on, then.” She flicked her tail to send them on their way, and the two quickly scuttled away to the healer’s den, nosing their way inside before any cat could call for them.

“You’re back.” Dewpaw was already awake and sorting herbs as they entered. Her mew caused Yellowfang to rouse from her slumber, opening one copper eye to inspect the two new arrivals. “Did you talk with him, then?”

“We did.” Fireheart replied, glancing around the den. Aside from the four of them, it was empty. “We didn’t get as many answers as we’d hoped, but we did get a lead.”

“Do tell.” Yellowfang growled dryly as she stood up and stretched out her back. “I hope it doesn’t involve more of Starclan’s interference.”

“No, but it does involve something almost as bad.” Peppermask sighed as she sat down, her tail twitching. “Talking to Riverclan.”

“Because of the battle?” Dewpaw asked, eyes narrowing thoughtfully. “You don’t suppose any of them saw Tigerclaw kill Redtail?”

Her sister shook her head. “No, not exactly. Remember how Tigerclaw said Oakheart killed Redtail, and he killed Oakheart? Well, if he killed Redtail…”

“Then who killed Oakheart?” The healer’s apprentice perked her ears forward in surprise. “I never thought about that. You don’t suppose it was Tigerclaw as well?”

“Ravenspirit actually thought it could have been Redtail.” Fireheart responded. “He last saw them fighting, and when he next saw Redtail he was yowling about how Oakheart was dead. But that’s not the interesting part-”

“Just before he died, Oakheart stopped Redtail from attacking Stonestep.” The spotted warrior beside him interrupted, tail beginning to swish back and forth. “He said, ‘you of all cats know better than to attack that warrior’, or something like that. Ravenspirit wasn’t very sure.”

Even Yellowfang seemed baffled by the statement. “What is that supposed to mean? ‘’That warrior’?” The old healer wondered out loud. “It’s too bad we can’t ask Redtail himself. Surely he has some idea what that must mean.”

“We have to settle for the next best thing.” Peppermask responded evenly. “I’m friends with Stonestep’s sister, Mistyskip. I think if any cat might know what Oakheart meant, it would be her. Hopefully one of us will be able to go to the next Gathering, and be able to ask her directly.”

“I won’t be able to get Bluestar’s intervention this time, though.” Fireheart sighed, glancing out of the healer’s den towards the Highrock where the leader’s den was. “She made it very clear that she gave me an exception for the Gathering because of our special mission.”

“Then we’ll have to get invited on our own merit.” Peppermask replied, flattening her ears in stubborn determination. “We can even make it a competition. Like our first Gathering, remember?” She nudged the ruddy tom beside her with a smirk.

“Oh, I remember. That was the moon Yellowfang came to Thunderclan.” He glanced at the old molly with a teasing grin. “And she hasn’t let me forget about it since!”

The former Shadowclanner hissed and cuffed Fireheart’s ears lightly. “Oh, get out of here, both of you! Dewpaw and I have real work to do with you two lazing about my den.” 

“Alright, alright! We’ll see you around, Dewpaw, Yellowfang.” Fireheart purred to the two as he stood and turned to leave, the other warrior quickly following after him. The sun was beginning to peek over the treetops, bringing desperately needed warmth to the camp below. Cats were beginning to slide out of their dens as the Clan woke up to a fresh new dawn.

“Well, I think I’ll take a quick nap. Knowing Tigerclaw, he’s probably got us on the afternoon border patrols.” Peppermask mewed beside him, gently tapping his flank with his tail. “What about you? Coming with?”

He shook his head sadly. “If Tigerclaw catches me sleeping, he’ll claw my ears right off for daring to have the nerve. No, I think I’ll take care of the elders for Cinderpaw. I’m sure she’s tired from the Gathering last night and will appreciate having at least a little less to do today.”

The tabby molly nodded in understanding. “I’m sure she will.” He noticed her green eyes narrow a little bit, as though suddenly suspicious. “You’ve been awfully nice to her lately. Back when we were all apprentices, you seemed barely able to stand her. What’s changed your mind?”

He blinked in surprise at the accusatory tone in her question. Why had she become so barbed? “To be honest, I feel terrible for her. She’s the only one of us that’s still an apprentice, and the only one that didn’t get to go on the search for Windclan with us. She’s been very bitter lately, and I don’t blame her.” He sighed as he glanced towards their old den. She wasn’t sitting by the tree stump, waiting for Mistspring to wake up; perhaps she had been assigned to the dawn patrol. “I just want to show her we haven’t forgotten about her.” 

The other warrior was silent for a few moments. “She has been pretty lonely lately, huh? Especially since Snowkit hasn’t been named an apprentice yet.” The mention of the kit sent a shiver down Fireheart’s spine. She clearly didn’t know the truth either. “I keep waiting for Bluestar to announce her ceremony, but maybe Mistspring doesn’t think she’s ready yet.”

“That’s what she was worried about when I talked to her the other day.” He finally looked back to the apprentice’s sister, whose brow was furrowed as she also focused on the apprentices’ den. “You don’t really think Mistspring would do that, do you?”

Peppermask was silent for a long moment. “I don’t know.” She finally admitted. “Being a warrior is as much about understanding the warrior code and Clan life as it is about hunting or fighting. Maybe she thinks Cinderpaw hasn’t fully understood that yet.”

As much as he wanted to deny that, he understood what she was saying. Every decision that a warrior made affected the Clan as a whole as well. Cinderpaw could be quick, and clever, and strong, but she was also very impulsive; he could see her making a decision that would imperil the Clan all too easily, without realizing the consequences.

“Anyways.” Peppermask’s voice shook him out of his reverie. “Hopefully you’ll have an easy time with the elders. With leafbare coming, at least they won’t have so many fleas and ticks soon.” She gave him a wave with her tail as she headed for the warriors’ den to sleep.

He replied in kind as he also stood and padded across camp, this time to the elders’ den. He gave Patchpelt, who was stretching out in the morning light, a nod as he entered the hollow tree of their den. He carefully avoided several sleeping elders as he began to change out the stale moss of the old nests, his mind beginning to wander back to the conversation they’d had with Ravenspirit. 

A moon would be a long time to wait until the Gathering began, but they said prey ran over the paws of those who waited patiently. He just had to hope that this time, the wait would be worth it.

[universestreasures]

"My Birthday...It feels like it was so long ago, but..."

It was a day that, for better or worse, was forever seared into the prince's soul. Even now, as he looks up at the stars as his comrades sleep (or at least pretend to) the night away, the intense images of that entire day appear to haunt him, reminding him of how he got to this point and what he's fighting so hard for now.

He remembers how typical that day had started out. He had been awoken by Emi, the only person who could get him consistently to get out of bed. She nagged him on about how could he sleep in on the most important day of his life, and he apologized to her as he frantically got dressed for the rest of the day. Oh, how he misses those moments. These days he, unfortunately, didn't have the luxury of sleeping in, not when their group was constantly on the move to avoid the gaze of those working for Leon.

Once dressed, he remembers showing up to his own ceremony fashionably late, something those around him surely teased him of, including his family and friends. It's only once he's there that his father went on to present him to all those in attendance, reminding them all of how one day Aichi would take his place and lead the United Sanctuary, a duty the prince had been dreading his entire life.

He was nothing like his late father, King Ahmes, who had maintained the United Sanctuary's peace within its own borders and established good relations with most of the other nations of Cray. While there had been some infighting among the clans of the nation, especially from the Shadow Paladins, King Ahmes' bravery and leadership held things together. Some said he was much like the first king of the United Sanctuary, the one that brought them all together; the very same one Aichi was apparently a reincarnation of according to Messaih's Messenger.

And all of that work his father had done was swiftly taken away by someone Aichi had respected and grown up with, leaving his home in the hands of Leon Soryu. Never in a million years would he suspect Leon to do something like this, leaving him powerless to stop his own father from being murdered right before his eyes. He couldn't even do anything to avenge the king or help his mother or sister out, either. All he could do was watch helplessly as his world crumbled, and if it hadn't been for Kai protecting him and leading him to saftey, he is sure he would have joined his father in that pool of blood Leon had forged.

That very image of his father's corpse haunts Aichi the most. He can see it vividly, almost smell the copper scent of the cursed red liquid. He'd surely take the hit instead of his father if he could do it all over. As far as he was concerned, his life was far less valuable than that of the former king. The only reason anyone has cared about him, saw value in home, outside of his family or friends, was because of his title. That's it.

At least...that's what he used to think. Being on this journey with Kai, meeting Rekka and the knights he's met along the way, has changed him. Aichi began to see the value in what he could do instead of comparing himself to others. He wasn't a skilled swordsman like his father, even with the progress he's made since he's gotten help from Kai and the others. Where his strength lay was in how he could bring people together, talk through conflicts, and understand people and their motivations. To this day, he still thinks Leon must have had some good reason, at least in the other's mind, as to why he did what he did. He just... has yet to learn what that reason is.

He wasn't supposed to be a warrior like the late king. Aichi knows that. He had been against the idea to begin with, not wanting to tarnish the prince's gentle soul. However, he is willing to pick up a sword not to attack or get revenge, but to defend himself, his friends, his family, and his home. Even if it's against what King Ahmes had wished, the prince is sure he would understand this path he's decided to go on. He just knows that.

"Leon Soryu...We will take back my home and set things right. I promise you that." He makes the silent vow with a determined expression, his eyes still looking at the stars he just feels the Aqua Force head can see too at this moment. "And Misaki, Emi, Mom...Wherever you are, please hold on and wait for me a bit longer. I'll come back to you all soon enough."

He isn't sure when that day will be. They still had a long way to go before they were ready to challenge Leon, after all. And yet the prince's aura was one of confidence and hope that they would succeed. They had no other choice. The future of their home, the whole planet Cray really, rested on their shoulders. It was up to them to fix things, just as the prophecy Takuto had told them stated.

The prince then turns to return to his late-night sword training, doing the practice drills he had been taught over and over again. He had to get stronger. He had to make sure the faith he was given wasn't in vain. He had to make sure a tragedy like the one on his sixteenth birthday wouldn't happen again.

Because if it did...he doesn't know if he could live with himself...

~

[loquatenjoyer69]

1.) #gah since u tagged me i opened this post up literally 2 seconds after posting i saw the timestamp lol. cuz i live on tumblr.#and was like thats way too soon to respond let me wait a minute. and then i had a complicated brain day and had to read in a couple#sittings and not hold onto any thoughts kjsdf AS LOQUATS ALWAYS DOES TO ME.

I...forgot if tagging someone on tumblr gives them a notification so I didn't mean to like. throw this at you like HEY READ THIS I just wanted to credit you for funny bench name lol but thank you for reading it anyway :bow:

2.) #but i did pull out some of ur phrasings here in color coded notes bc im determined to conquer this arc and make it Holdable In Mind.#and i feel like im in good company to do so lol. SUCH GOOD WRITING ABOUT ITTTTTTTT

This is such an honor T_T I would love to see your notes at some point, I feel like I'll never get tired of talking about this arc

3.) #matoba drives me insane. cuz the thing right. is that he is signaled as unhappy with his lot. even tho he willingly does it all and agrees#w the cause and the methods. and what he would actually Want with a freer life is completely opaque to us.#vis a vis usual matoba writing/paneling closing us readers and other chars off from him. and possibly bc he himself doesnt know.#and so the only thing we have sort of gestured at as something that matoba wants is natori's companionship.#and the only person who sort of kind of gets a look at a vulnerable matoba (nonanswer to the question natsume gets a direct answer to#and the more open sketch expression in response to his offer before the i hate my life bench*). IS NATORI.

For a while I've been undecided on what I think Matoba thinks about his own life...it's really hard to tell because he doesn't appear that often in the grand scheme of NatsuYuu, and we've never gotten a chapter from his POV (but what if. Midorikawa. did that. 0_0). But I think I agree with you, it seems like he probably is unhappy or unsatisfied to some extent. And I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't know exactly what he would want if he could have it. He seems like the kind of person to have a lot of messy layers of personality and thought going on, like, the course of his life has always been dictated for him, so there was never a possibility of him getting to do What He Wants. He must have personal desires to some extent, but I wonder how much he lets himself dwell on them.... Okay this is kind of goofy and a stretch but now I'm thinking about his love of sweets and the little remarks other Matoba members have made about him sneaking out for snacks or whatever (I don't remember the chapter but please tell me I'm not imagining this), and how this is something he wants that he can have that isn't related really to the clan business. Matoba's pursual of delicious sweets as a manifestation of having what he wants, something just for him. Wait now we're getting back to the loquats. "It was sweet and delicious; my desire had been fulfilled. But Natori must have gotten a bad one. He was making a weird face [...] Oh, I thought, there's no winning, even in such a small thing as this." Hm.

Ummmm also wrt Natori being the only one who gets to see a more vulnerable Matoba, it's a little funny (painful) because it seems like, especially from his adolescent point of view, that he feels like Matoba is very aloof and couldn't possibly care about him or like, things that don't have to do with success. Not that Matoba makes it easy. But Natori really was...an insecure kid. For good reason though LOL. But augh that's the tragedy of these two to me, they were both like, the wrong people at the wrong time. But maybe now...? :thonk:

Matoba and Burden and Desire

I originally watched/read Natsuyuu back in fall of 2022, and then a few months ago, literally out of nowhere, my brain was like “Hey, remember that loquat story Matoba told in that one arc? It felt like there was something there, let’s go reread that,” which I did, and have been in hexorcists hell about ever since.

(pictured: a sane person’s reaction to reading natsuyuu)

And really, that’s it. The loquat story feels like there’s something there, but I couldn’t quite figure out what was going on. But after my close rereading of that arc, I think I’ve at least come to one coherent conclusion about it, even if it’s perhaps the most basic one: I think the loquats are an allegory for the greater themes of burden/desire in this arc. The following is my attempt to lay out my thoughts, but unfortunately I have never been known for my conciseness or my ability to organize my thoughts, so be forewarned. This will be rambly and include a few tangents/too much detail.

The story of the Miharu family is a story of a family that was once respected, had a relationship/contract with powerful ayakashi, and eventually fell into ruin, leaving behind their contracts. The ayakashi, the mihashira, still come to uphold their part of the agreement without fail, but the family is gone. So who comes in their place to maintain the contract? The Matobas, and in the present day, the current head of the Matoba clan is Matoba Seiji. In order to maintain this deal with a group of powerful youkai, which neither he nor his family actually made, Matoba has to come and perform the welcoming ritual to avoid incurring the wrath of the mihashira.

Matoba is a character marked by burden, I think. Though he is the head of the most powerful exorcist clan, and therefore one might expect that he can pretty much do what he wants, I don’t actually think he has much personal freedom. The only son of the main family, he was probably marked as the heir from birth (if not, he would have had to be once his sister left but I still need to read 120+ so I don’t know exactly what the deal with her is). The clan’s interests are his interests. He can’t do anything that might hurt the reputation of or endanger the clan, and he is obligated to do things that benefit the clan. Matoba is Matoba. 

In chapter 25, in his debut arc, he tells Natsume 「使えるものは使わないと。人を守る為に、強い妖が欲しいと思っているだけですよ。その為には恨まれたり代償を払うことを気にしていたら、この家業はやっていけませんしね」

"One should make use of useful things. I just want ayakashi in order to protect people. If I was worried about being hated or suffering consequences, I could not carry on the family business,"

(this is actually one of those annoying instances of a Japanese sentence that’s more dense than would sound good in English. Matoba seems to be explaining his personal worldview/thoughts here with 思っている even though in English you’d never say “I just feel like/think I want strong ayakashi…” He’s explaining that this is the way he thinks, I think lol).

Matoba doesn’t get the privilege of having a good reputation among humans or ayakashi, since we learn in special chapter 17 that no good ayakashi will make deals with the Matobas because of their famous broken promise. Matoba Seiji not only inherits the burden of monthly eye-stealing visits, he also can’t make contracts with ayakashi and  takes on all the distrust that’s built up over generations from both humans and ayakashi. 

And now Matoba is taking on the debts of a dead branch family to avoid possibly endangering his own.

In the locked room, when Matoba is goading Natori into breaking them out, he says 「どうです？あなたには解くことができますか名取。無理ならばすべて私が片付けてさしあげましょうか？」

"Well, can you do it, Natori? If you can’t, shall I take care of everything for you?"

I’m unsure how much of this is Matoba teasing Natori (as he seems to like doing in the Homura arc) about how he’s not as powerful/skilled as Matoba, and how much is him simply making an offer because he’s Matoba and he’s The One Who Takes Care Of Everything. I think either way, there is at least a good amount of the latter going on here. 

In special chapter 17, Matoba shows up at Natori’s house and helps him exorcise the ayakashi that’s been haunting him. After Natori wakes up, he tries to offer to help Matoba in some way. I think he felt uncomfortable being the only one being helped, and wanted to find something he could offer Matoba, even though Matoba seems to have everything he needs. Natori offers to listen to his problems, and Matoba smiles (of course) and says he’s fine. Even teenage Matoba is like “You’re not the one who helps me, I’m the one who helps you.” Though this chapter is from Natori’s perspective, so Natori believes Matoba was just using him to get an ayakashi, I’m not sure that’s true. I don’t know for sure what Matoba’s motives were, but I don’t believe teenage Natori is an unbiased observer of him lol. 

Now that we’ve laid all that out, let’s talk briefly about the Miharus, a once respected family who made a deal with ayakashi they didn’t understand, and fell into ruin. According to the ayakashi who wants to sabotage the ritual, there was a member of the Miharu family called Masakiyo. Masakiyo was stern for the most part, but there was someone he loved. However, he couldn’t be with that person because he couldn’t make them shoulder the burdens of his family business, but neither could he simply abandon his family. He had to stay with his family and let this person go. This was the only time this ayakashi saw Masakiyo cry. Then we get this panel:

(pictured: bench of I Hate My Life, credit to @joelletwo for that lol)

In his despair, Masakiyo wished there was no Miharu family. The ayakashi, feeling indebted to Masakiyo for letting it go during an exorcism, overhears him and decides that destroying the Miharu family will bring Masakiyo happiness. This is an unintended contract between the two of them. Masakiyo unwittingly causes an ayakashi to spend years (decades?) trying in vain to destroy his family in order to repay a perceived debt. This isn’t Masakiyo’s fault, really, it was just an unfortunate misunderstanding. The ayakashi didn’t understand that Masakiyo wanted it to be free and live the life he couldn’t. “You were almost exorcised because of human circumstances. You were saved on the whim of a human. What debt? You are free. Go wherever you want. Live however you want.”

After all the mihashira business is wrapped up, Matoba thanks Natori for his help, Natori says he probably couldn’t have gotten out of the room without Matoba, and Matoba laughs and says “Then we’re even this time.” Neither one is indebted to the other this time…they’re even. Then Natori says The Line:

「何かを継ぎ背負っていく…その真の重みは私などにははかり知れません。でも今はこう思うようにもなりました。重いものもひとりでなければと…」

"I don’t know the true weight of shouldering a burden you’ve inherited, but now I’ve come to think that even heavy things can be carried if you’re not alone,"

(this is another one of the aforementioned Dense Japanese Sentences, and I really prefer the fan TL version of this line but I’m translating it this way to try to convey all the stuff he’s saying). Natori once again reaches out to Matoba, trying to offer him maybe the only thing he can: support, listening to his problems, shouldering his burdens. This time, though, we don’t get a Matoba Smile and “I’m fine,” we get this:

(pictured: Matoba on the bench of I Hate My Life, or “Matoba Cow Beach” as I refer to this image in my head)

What is Matoba thinking here? I really don’t know. If I draw the obvious parallel with Masakiyo, I guess he’s contemplating his two…selves, as it were. His duty to his family vs his personal desire for companionship. And I do think Matoba wants companionship. I read his behavior in special chapter 15 as genuinely wanting to be friends with Natori. I think he was excited that there was someone else his age who was relatively powerful, and who wasn’t concerned with all the Matoba stuff. Hence his insistence on Natori calling him Seiji. He wanted to be close to Natori.

And finally, we can come back to the loquats. Natsume hears Matoba mocking the mihashira for continuing to protect the Miharu house even after the family has all died out, and thinks perhaps Matoba is envious of ayakashi who go to such great lengths to keep promises.

"Matoba-san, who keeps breaking promises, and doesn’t have anyone to make new ones with."

Matoba wonders how the welcoming ritual will go next time, but decides he won’t worry since he probably won’t even be the head of the clan at that time. Natsume offers him a loquat, saying cheer up, and Matoba does his Thing, saying  “How odd, do I look upset?” and then tells The Story.

When Matoba was a teenager, he really wanted to try the loquats from Yorishima’s yard. One day, he was there with Natori, and Yorishima gave them both one. The loquat was delicious and sweet; Matoba felt that his “desire had been fulfilled,” but Natori got a sour one, and Matoba felt like Yorishima-san had wanted to give a loquat to Natori, and only given one to Matoba because he was there, so he thought “Ah there’s no winning even in such a small thing as this.” Matoba gets what he wants, but it wasn’t meant for him, and the one it was meant for is worse off, so did he really win? He was the only one who got to enjoy the delicious loquat. These are the unintended consequences, the burdens if you will, of desire. 

Natsume speculates that the agreement with the mihashira began when someone had the wish to protect the Miharu family, and there was an ayakashi who happened to be there, much like the situation with Masakiyo and the sabotaging ayakashi. A simple and innocent wish accidentally creates a generations-long burden that Matoba eventually has to shoulder. 

I think Matoba must be painfully aware of his power and influence, and that even his smallest actions could cause unintended consequences. I wonder if he sees the Miharu family as a warning of what could happen to his own family if he slips up… And it wasn’t just a mistake on the part of the Miharus, but a failure of the Matoba clan head of that time, whose responsibility it was to look out for the branch families. Matoba Seiji is not just responsible for the success of his own family, but protecting the branch families, and of course non-exorcists as well. I imagine he feels like he doesn’t have the time or room to act on any of his own personal desires, and his little loquat anecdote is evidence of that, to me. It’s bittersweet (lol). And Natori’s takeaway, meanwhile, is more casual as you might expect. When Natsume asks him if he likes loquats, he says he’s not sure because his first one wasn’t very good. To Natori, a loquat is something he might try again and like. To Matoba, it’s a reminder of what he can and can’t have.

[gusu-emilu]

Top 5 Wen Ning Scenes

1. Golden core reveal

There are so many things I love about this scene. We've seen Wen Ning physically protect others many times before, but this is him forging his own path with emotional and verbal assertiveness. It's not a clear-cut right or wrong choice either: Wen Ning stands up for Wei Wuxian at the same time he is breaking his promise to keep the secret. (interesting that his biggest moments in the narrative involve some form of treachery - betraying his clan, harming Wei Wuxian's family, breaking a promise. a bit of a stretch to add, but even his existence as a fierce corpse goes against against the nature of life)

In this scene he is also standing up for himself as much as for Wei Wuxian--Jiang Cheng hits him with Zidian three times, and each time he stands up and returns with staggered but determined steps. He's normally so soft-spoken, but here we get to hear him raise his voice (and even kinda growl. god i love the growls). I also enjoy that Wen Qing is finally mentioned by name post-timeskip.

Although throughout the scene Wen Ning is visibly angry, he also seems very sad, especially once everyone has left. He carried this secret for so long, helped the core transfer happen and saw its consequences, and now he's seen Jiang Cheng's visceral reaction to the knowledge. Being the bearer of the truth isn't necessarily a pleasant thing.

2. Committing treason with a smile

Here's a gif of the smiley tap tap which is my favorite thing in the world

Wen Ning using his strengths! He has knowledge of medicine, so he drugs the wine. He knows his status isn't taken very seriously, so his excuse of just stopping by because he wanted to see what happened does the job.

I also love that he has this very brief nervous gesture when the guards approach (do I hold the jar with one hand? two hands? aaaghh how do i make this seem casual??) and then by the time the guards reach him, he's 100% in the zone and lies with such confidence and cheerfulness

3. Dramatic entrance at Guanyin Temple

A good portion of my reasoning for this one is head empty only Ghost General. The lightning?? The mean glare?? Dragging Baxia behind him??? This moment is too good!

I also enjoy that initially, everyone thinks it's Nie Mingjue. And Jin Guangyao, who is already having the worst last-farewell-date-with-erge-turned-dysfunctional-family-reunion ever, and is running on dangerously high levels of paranoia, and has already gotten jumpscared by Nie Mingjue's body replacing his mom's corpse, now thinks Da-ge is back and coming for him. But that's just some added spice.

I'll also lump this scene with Wen Ning saving Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng from Baxia. In the past, Wen Ning killed under the control of resentful energy. Here, he's able to fight Baxia's possession and save the son of the man he never meant to kill. About as chill-inducing as the novel version of Guanyin Temple where Wen Ning is pierced through the chest the same way Jin Zixuan was.

4. Bonding with A-Yuan

Reunited with his last living relative! Wen Ning has someone to tell all his stories too :) Their relationship is so gentle, and I love how Sizhui actively reaches out to Wen Ning before he even knows the truth of his identity.

Also, I adore the giant stiff hand gestures Wen Ning makes while talking.

5. Chef A-Ning

One of the first things Wen Ning does once getting his consciousness back is to cook all the dishes for Wei Wuxian's dinner party. And also apparently get charcoal all over his face while doing it. He is the sweetest. He makes another great appearance later looking so cute by literally just holding a tray.

I love how once his consciousness is restored, he is welcomed back so lovingly by his family and is integrated into their daily lives right away--shopping in town, farming, selling turnips, etc.

In this scene, Wen Qing proudly tells Wei Wuxian that "A-Ning" did the cooking, and Wei Wuxian repeats the name "A-Ning" which is one of the few times (that I know of) that he refers to Wen Ning by this term of endearment...Burial Mounds family really does something to me.

Bonus:

(ask me my top 5 anything)

[cinnamonest]

The existence of Shenhe has me thinking about the concept of an older exorcist clan aunt to Chongyun and an extremely jealous Xingqiu who is absolutely down bad, down horrendous, down atrocious for this woman

Like. Shenhe herself has a more distant/cold persona but imagine a different sweet auntie that's fully loving, doting, teasing, definitely on the verge of ara-ara'ing her sweet baby nephew because how could you not?? Look at how cute and dense he is, she thinks he deserves coochie just for existing honestly (which is 100% true, but his friend would disagree). You're the hot aunt who is definitely used to having cute young men lust after you and all that, so it's not surprising when your nephew gets blushy around you or when his friends tend to stutter in your presence. And you egg them on to some degree, wearing all the lowest necklines and shortest of dresses/skirts possible without being too obscene for public. But while you enjoy doing that to all the young blushy boys of the area, of course you're going to be extra affectionate to your family, it's only natural. Going on and on whenever you run into him and his friend in the harbor area, ruffling his hair and cooing at him in that doting maternal sort of way, telling him he's gotten taller since you last saw him, gotten so handsome, such a sweet boy, on and on goes the praises and fussing, full-on front hugs that smother his face into your chest, forehead kisses, pinching his cheeks in that teasing way while you talk to him in that overly-saccharine voice. Absolutely disgusting. Who would ever enjoy being treated in such a way. Certainly not him, Xingqiu thinks to himself, he's very very glad Chongyun is on the receiving end of that and not him. He's glad you only reach around when you're done and give him a quick pat on the head and say some sweet things about how cute he is and... that's it. Well, not that he's upset, he didn't want a warm face-in-tits hug, he was just kind of expecting you to do the same to him. But he's glad. He was just kinda mentally preparing himself for it, that's why his face looked a bit surprised when you didn't, and just walked off after that. Dodged a bullet, really. And while it's certainly awful and not something he would ever want, he does scoff a bit at how Chongyun seems so embarrassed. It seems... ungrateful. Shouldn't he be happy she loves him so much? Again, not that it's something he wants. But, you must be hurt by being told it's embarrassing and the way Chongyun draws back from your touching, right? Or so he thinks. So, he's extra nice to you, just to make you feel appreciated, that's all. So he should become acquainted, that only makes sense. Of course, he thinks, she clearly views Chongyun as a kid, but! That actually provides him with a good opportunity, if Chongyun is there, he'll seem even more mature and intelligent by comparison! And that's bound to make a great impression. While the affection wouldn't be so bad (again, not that he wants it, of course), he would hate for her to have that same cooing, diminutive tone as if she sees his as a kid or something, so he just has to impress her, which should be easy given his mature persona that he totally has and his knowledge on many things and the fact that he's very well-read.

But. You don't. He is bewildered, flabbergasted when you talk to him in that same voice even when discussing intellectual topics! Do... Do you think he's dumb? Did the "be associated with Chongyun" plan backfire and now she thinks he's just as dense? Is he not impressive enough? He starts off just trying his absolute best to appear more mature and intelligent, but unfortunately in your eyes it just makes him even cuter, he's trying so hard to be taken seriously! How adorable. He likes your attention, of course, but in his jerk-off fantasies you're telling him how you're so impressed that he's so mature and well-learned for his age! Not calling him cute! Not only that, but even though you have been at least acknowledging him, you still pay far more attention to your own nephew -- who doesn't appreciate you or your touches, who gets all embarrassed because of you, who doesn't deserve those hugs -- than him! The one who actually has gone out of his way to deserve it! Fortunately, he has alternative methods, other metaphorical weapons in the arsenal -- he can always pull out the expensive gift method of making you like him. Nice clothes, jewelry. He pays for your meals when you two go out -- well, he likes to pretend it's you two. In reality, poor Chongyun begged him to go with him in hopes that his presence would deter you from becoming too overbearing and keep things more PG if Xingqiu is there, to which he *begrudgingly* obliges, anything for a friend, even though he totally has better things to do with his time and doesn't see this as an opportunity, nor does he kinda push poor Chongyun to the side and pretend in his head it's a date.... And you accept it, you're sweet, but you still... prefer... your nephew. After everything he's done. Unbelievable. Over time he starts getting more visibly bratty, more desperate, more blunt. His smile twitches, he clenches his jaw, clears his throat more. every now and then he finds himself getting snappy at his friend when you're on your dates where he's totally not the third wheel, but he apologizes as soon as he does, saying he's just a bit tired today. Due to desperation, he gets more obvious about it, directly tries to ask you in a casual way that doesn't sound super obvious (it does) exactly why you like Chongyun so much? After all, you deserve to be with-- ah, spend time with someone who appreciates you. Surely you have someone like that. Anyone come to mind? ...Anyone at all...?

[solarwriting]

guns and gifts

carl gallagher x fem!reader

request: Hey! I hope I can send you a request for Karl Gallagher of Shameless. Maybe Karl and y / n were a couple before jail, and after leaving jail he came to her to ask her for forgiveness. y / n doesn't forgive him and he starts giving her gifts and apologizing every day. Then everything is at your discretion. Happy ending please💛 from @powerpuffluuvv

genere: fluff + angst

word count: 2.1k

warnings: swearing, ooc carl

posted on april 18, 2021

puppy love. thirteen year-olds holding hands and sharing stolen kisses. it was a sweet relationship that could’ve grown and matured with the two teens as they did. instead carl found himself a job on the corner and when he got caught y/n was done. fiona tried to get through to the boy, asking him to apologize but he brushed her off.

“can i please just talk to him? maybe he’ll listen to me.” y/n pleaded with the lawyer.

fiona stepped in, “it wouldn’t hurt to try it.”

“five minutes.” the lawyer relented.

y/n thanked him and rushed into the room where he sat. he squinted at her through the glasses fiona gave him. “i’m not fuckin’ sorry. i wish i was smarter about it. i wouldn’t have used chuckie as a mule.”

“you know what. if you don’t tell that judge you’re fucking sorry and that you’ve learned from your mistakes i will never speak to you again.” y/n exited the room quickly letting the ultimatum hang in the air as the door slammed behind her.

during the hearing her eyes were trained on the back of his head, hoping she could somehow will him to do the right thing. she kept her arms crossed as she leaned back. kev and v were sat next to her, waiting anxiously to see what he’d say.

“i’m going to make juvie my bitch.” as soon as he said those words, y/n sighed, getting up from her seat, shouldering her back and slipping out of the courtroom as they hauled carl away. he caught her eye before she left, she froze for a moment before shaking her head and making her exit.

time passed and she still spent time with the rest of the gallaghers, she lived across the street so it would have been hard not too. she helped take care of liam when needed and she got a job at patsy’s with fiona’s help.

the day carl came back had been a surprise for everyone, y/n was helping fiona with making dinner after a shift at patsy’s. the front door had slammed shut and, thinking it was debbie, fiona asked if she got a message about hamburger buns. y/n’s eyes shot up when a much deeper voice responded, “nah, it’s just me.”

excited, fiona rushed towards the boy, wrapping him up in a hug. hugging back, he looked up throwing a wave to y/n who was rooted in place, “hey, y/n.”

snapping herself back into reality she lurched forward wiping her hands and grabbing her things, pulling her bag over her shoulder and gripping her keys tightly she looked back at the boy as fiona fussed over his new appearance. “fuck you, carl.” she spat, slamming the back door shut behind her.

y/n managed to avoid carl at school the next day, he was too busy with “his boy” nick and his new white boy carl personality and selling illegal weapons in the bathrooms to bother her anyways. she rushed to patsy’s as soon as school ended and began her shift.

she spent the afternoon rushing from table to table, taking orders, passing out food, and pouring coffee. she was pouring coffee for a couple sitting near the front door when the bell twinkled, signaling a new customer.

her back turned to the door and her focus pointed and the coffee she was pouring she greeted the customer quickly, “take a seat anywhere and i’ll be right with you darling.” she smiled at the couple before turning around, finding herself face to face with white boy carl himself. “get the fuck out.”

y/n rushed away from him, pouring coffee for a man sat at the counter. carl followed, “please just talk to me, y/n.”

“she doesn’t want to talk to you, man.” the customer spoke up as y/n placed the coffee pot on the burner.

“what the fuck did you just say to me?” carl asked the man.

he stood up, “i told you she doesn’t want to talk. so leave.”

y/n stepped in before a physical altercation broke out, “thank so much, sir, but i can fight my own battles.” she pushed carl towards the door, “out.” she kept pushing him despite his protests, “get the fuck out. go.”

the door slammed behind them, and carl began to speak, “no, you’re going to shut your fucking mouth and listen. i don’t want to listen to you. i don’t want to talk to you. and i don’t even want to see you but that last one might be a little fucking impossible since we’re neighbors and i work with your sister so i’m going to be civil towards you but i will only acknowledge your existence when it is absolutely necessary. clear?”

carl began to protest but y/n cut him off, “are we fucking clear?” carl grumbled an agreement and y/n sighed, “good, now get the fuck out if here. i have to go back to work.”

y/n rushed back into the diner, throwing herself back into work. hoping she looked busy enough to keep the nosy man from before to leave her alone, she poured more coffee, took orders, passed out plates. until her shift ended and she could finally take the l back home.

the next run in with carl happened two days later, she was walking home from school, thankful for the day off from work when carl and nick pulled up on a bike. “y/n! wait!”

sighing, y/n whipped around, “i thought i told you i didn’t want to talk to you.”

“i have something for you.” carl explained as he got closer, y/n ignored him and started walking again, the bike quickly catching up with her. “here.”

y/n scoffed, eyeing the bag, “whatever it is i don’t want it.”

“it’s a book, debbie told me you wanted to read it.”

y/n sped up, “no thanks, already read it.” she didn’t care what book it was, she didn’t want anything from him. she took this moment to cross the street, the passing cars making it difficult for the boys on the bike to follow.

she entered the gallagher house hoping carl would be too busy to come home for a few hours while she watched liam. “i get off at nine, if anyone else comes home you’re welcome to leave but i plan on bringing something back for dinner if you want to stick around for that.”

“of course i’ll stay. me and liam are going to have a great time. isn’t that right liam?” y/n asked the toddler who nodded enthusiastically. fiona thanked her and rushed out the door.

y/n put on a movie, which liam fell asleep watching about thirty minutes in. y/n got up and stretched when the movie ended, adjusting the blanket she threw over liam when he fell asleep. she walked in the kitchen, stiff from sitting for so long. she pulled out a can of pop from the fridge and leaned her back against the fridge, using to stretch her body more.

the door swung open and carl walked in, “good you’re hear, i have something else for you.”

“whatever it is, i don’t want it.” y/n sighed into her drink.

“it’s a necklace, here.” he opened the velvet box to show her an expensive looking necklace.

she turned away from him, “no thanks.” walking back into the living room. “go somewhere else please, i have to watch liam.”

carl sighed before exiting the house with nick, who had been hanging back by the door during the exchange. he nodded to nick and the two rolled out to go do god knows what.

that night fiona came home with food, the entire gallagher clan plus kev and v enjoyed. there were enough people that y/n managed to avoid speaking to carl the entire evening. every time he tried to speak to her she’d find someone to talk to, she talked lip about something she had to do for school, ian told her about trevor, and her and debbie talked about anything.

v even pointed out the strange behavior when carl was left looking slightly dejected to fiona, who just shrugged in response.

“thank you fiona, goodnight everyone.” y/n called as she stepped out the back door. she crossed the street quickly and made it home, which as usual was empty, the rest of her family nowhere to be found.

she sighed, grabbing a beer from the fridge and kicking of her shoes as soon as she made it to her room. she threw herself back on her bed yelping when she collided with something hard. she jumped up only to see the jewelry box and book carl had bought her. she set her beer down and pulled the box open, smiling at the necklace. it was gold, with a small tear shaped pendant that held some sort of crystal or diamond.

she set the box next to her beer, which she grabbed and took sip of as she grabbed the book. it was actually something she’d been wanting, she rolled her eyes before opening it to the first page.

the next fee days followed a similar pattern, carl would stop her at school and work and even his own house to offer her gifts, which she would refuse, which would always end up on her bed at the end of the day. on a particularly rough day, y/n had enough. she was walking home from school, carl (who was alone this time) behind her, like clockwork offering another gift.

“carl, please just leave me alone. i don’t have the energy to deal with you.” y/n said not stopping. carl made a comment and y/n snapped, “god i’m not going to forgive you because you chose to go to juvie. you could have just apologized and gotten parole but that didn’t happen. and i’m not going to be your girlfriend again because i don’t even know who you are any more, this thug personality doesn’t look good on you.” y/n sighed rushing away before he could answer.

she was suddenly thankful for the day off, deciding to spend it all alone at home. it was a friday and her weekend was also free so she spent the next few days home alone. her family was gone of course, they only only seemed to show up once a month just to leave again the same day.

sunday evening y/n laid in the couch watching what was on tv when there was a knock on the door. y/n groaned, getting up to answer it freezing when carl was revealed on the other side. he looked small, he was curled into himself and he looked sad. his braids were out, soft curls in the place. “hey, y/n.” he said softly. y/n wordlessly moved out of the way to let him in.

“i’m done. no more sell drugs, guns, anything. something happened, with nick and i don’t want that to be my life anymore.” his voice cracked and y/n instinctively wrapped him into a hug, squeezing protectively. he cried into her shoulder, holding her tightly, scared to let her go.

“hey,” y/n spoke softly, running her fingers through his hair, “you’re okay. i got you.” once carl calmed down, he pulled away but y/n held onto him, hands on his face.

“i really miss you y/n. and i know i was awful before but all i want to do is be with you. i love you.” he sighed, his hands holding her wrists.

y/n pulled him closer, “i love you, too, idiot.” carl gave her a lopsided smiled before surging forward to connect their lips in a hot kiss. y/n stumbled backwards before backing into the wall behind her. carl bit on her lip softly causing her breath to catch in her throat. she tugged on his hair and he squeezed her hips. she pulled away for breath, pressing her forehead to his, “my room?” breathless carl nodded pressing a quick kiss to her lips before they rushed to her room.

the next morning the front door slammed opened, “y/n! i’m going to kill fiona!” debbie stormed through the house bursting into y/n’s room where she was laying next to a topless carl, wearing only his t-shirt, “oh my god! ew!” debbie shielded her eyes from the sight before her.

“hey, debs.” y/n mumbled, sheepishly.

debbie groaned, “just get dressed, we have school.”

[i-cant-sing]

I know requests are closed so this isn’t a request I just had an idea based off an ask you got about hawks and the Todoroki clan. What if the reader escaped from yandere Todoroki clan (Dabi scared the reader/took it too far with the threats, or because endeavor and the brothers had a fight and the reader got scared)and they ran into hawks, crying and panicked thinking that he would help. But hawks recognizes them from the pictures in endeavors desk and offers them a lift to somewhere safe. Only for hawks to fly the reader back to the Todoroki estate where the whole family is waiting for them.

The reader feels hurt and betrayed and everyone is angry, but hawks being hawks tries to diffuse the situation by saying,”stop scaring the poor kid. They came to me scared out of their mind, but being the outstanding godfather that I am, I made sure to bring them back safely.” (Or something like that)

And endeavor just accepts that hawks claimed himself as the readers godfather, and tells the reader to get inside and to clean up.

So now hawks takes it upon himself to hang around the estate more to fulfill his “godfather” duties, spoiling the reader as much as he can.

Yandere Godfather Hawks x Todoroki clan reader

I was going to write boyfriend Hawks, instead of Godfather Hawks but this was just too good. I kinda thought that the age gap between Hawks and reader would be too much so maybe Godfather would be a better role for him, but the chaos that would follow if they find him dating reader would be just *chef's kiss*. I think I just might write bf Hawks too. Let me know what you guys think.

Anyways, enjoy!

Check out my MASTERLIST here!

Yandere Hawks:

You didn't know how long you had been running for. You didn't know how far you had gotten away from their house. You didn't even know where you were going, to be honest. But you did know that you had to get away from there as far as you could.

Sure, you only had a few hours headstart. But for them, the most powerful family in Japan, this wasn’t enough time for you. 

You had planned your escape with their schedule in mind.

Enji would come home from his office at 9pm; he used to return at 11, but ever since you were kidnapped adopted by them, he tries to come home early.

Natsuo had already visited you during the day. He habitually comes after his shift at the hospital. Once he would check you over for any injuries and be satisfied with your overall health, he would join you, Rei and Fuyumi for a quick lunch before leaving.

Usually, you would spend the day with Rei, Fuyumi and Shotou, then Enji would come by the time dinner was served. And once everyone went to sleep, Dabi would come to visit you around 2 am. He would tap on your window and disturb you from your sleep, but its not like you have any engagements in the morning anyways. Once you would let him in, he would talk to you and maybe watch a movie too. If he's pissed, he might "accidentally" leave a burn mark on your arm (and you've tried asking your family for help, but they wouldn't do anything. Natsuo would just bandage you up, while Shotou would comfort you. Besides, you've learned not to snitch on Dabi because he would even get angrier than before.)

That was your routine ever since they had took you, almost 7 months ago. Well, they had actually adopted you an year ago, and everything was going well. But then you started noticing their odd behaviour. You thought they were just being protective of you at first, but as time went on, their obsessive tendencies and no regard for your personal boundaries started weirding you out.

Then one day, they just stopped letting you out of the house. No matter how much you cried, begged or fought, they just wouldn't let you go outside, telling that you its for your own good.

At first, they would use cuffs to keep you bound since you fought so much. But then you started behaving, and they slowly started trusting you more and stopped putting on the restraints.

What they didn't know was that you were just biding your time, waiting for the perfect opportunity to escape. Like today.

Shotou had to go to his friend's house to work on a school project, so he wasn't able to join you at lunch today and would be coming home late.

After lunch, once Natsuo had left, you asked Fuyumi if she could go to the mall and buy you some books. You had been complaining to her about your boredom for quite sometime now, so she agreed and left to go shop for you.

So that only left you with Rei in the house. And while she had a weaker quirk than the rest of the family, your quirkless self was no match for her either.

But she was easier to fool. You told Rei that you were going to take a nap in your room and to call you when dinner was ready. Rei nodded before going to the kitchen to start preparing for dinner.

You went to your room and opened the window to get out. It used to be bolted shut but after months of working on it slowly but stealthily, you had managed to pop it open. It was 6, and you were sure Fuyumi and Shotou would be coming home by 7, so without having anytime to pack, you ran.

It was stupid. You should've at least gotten your coat and shoes on, but there was no guarantee a chance like this would appear again, so you left without them.

You kind of regret it now, as you winced in pain at all the rocks and twigs pressing into your bare feet. You shivered in the cold, which didn't bother you at first because of the adrenaline pumping through your veins, but now as you slid against a dumpster in an alley to give a break to your legs, you wished Rei could've given you some proper clothes, instead of the light, pastel pink dress. In her defence, the house was centrally heated during winters so you didn't really need warm clothes inside the house. But now, looking at the dark clouds forming in the sky, you wished she could've at least given you a sweater.

It had soon started raining, and the wind had picked up as well. Shivering, you decided to stay put by the dumpster and wait until it stopped. It would be easier for them to find you if you ran now because the streets will be empty because of the rain. And its not like you could go to a police station either. How will you explain to them that the no.1 hero had kidnapped you?

Sighing, you closed your eyes. You just have to vanish from their eyes until they give up on you, or at least find someone else to replace you.

Hawks was flying home when it had begun raining. Tutting, he flew back to the ground to walk his way home. It was dangerous to fly during the rain; his feathers would get heavy and weigh him down.

As he was walking, whistling to himself, he heard someone whimper in the alley to his left. He walked in the dark alley, bracing himself for any sudden movements. The little whimpers came from near the dumpster. The alley had no light, so he couldn't see much. He walked closer to the source of whimpers and he could make out a silhouette of a shivering girl, who was completely drenched. Her eyes were closed so she hadn't noticed Hawks yet.

He took a step closer. "Hey. You okay?" As soon Hawks voice reached her ears, she snapped her eyes open and backed away from him. Hawks backed up a bit, raising his hands in surrender. "Its okay. I'm a hero." He said, calmly.

Once she seemed recognise him, or at least realise he wasn't dangerous, she relaxed a bit. "What are you doing in the rain?"he asked. She paused for a bit, before replying in a tiny voice,"none of your business." Hawks smiled. "It kinda is. Now you can either tell me, or I can take you to the cops and you can tell them. What's it gonna be?"

Your breath hitched at his question. If he takes you to the cops, Enji will surely find you, and the punishment that will be waiting for you...you didn't even want to think about it. "I'm just...running." you mumbled, hoping he would leave you alone. "From who?" When you didn't reply, he sighed. "Okay. Can you tell me why you're running?"

You thought for a bit. Would he believe if you told him the truth? You knew he was close friends with Enji and you heard from Enji that he was very loyal to him, so you doubted that he would believe you if you told him the no. 1 hero had been holding you hostage for 7 months. But maybe he could help you. If you just tell him that someone's after you, then maybe he could drop you off somewhere safe?

Gulping, you answered. "I- I was kidnapped. And they've probably noticed that I'm missing now and- and I need to hide before they can find me. I can't, I can't go back there-" your voice broke down as you slowly started crying.

Hawks's eyes widened as he heard you confess. He hugged you, rubbing your back soothingly. "Shh, its okay. I'm here now. Tell me who it is." You shook your head no. "Don’t be afraid. I'll keep you safe. Just tell me who-" "No!"you cut him off, realising that you would be putting his life in danger if you told him the truth. The Todorokis have done it before, with your old family and friends; you have no doubt that they will do it again.

Hawks was taken aback by your outburst. Who were you so afraid of? Was it a crazy ex? Or a family member? Maybe you had gotten in trouble with the wrong crowd? Whoever it was, fear was evident in your voice. He had to help you.

"Okay. I'm sorry. How about we get out of the rain? Maybe to a cafe, where we can get a coffee to warm ourselves up?" He asked you again, trying to look at your face in the dark. You shook your head again, before speaking. "Could you- could you just get me out of this city? Or at least as far away from here as possible?"

Who were you so scared of that you wanted to leave the city? He could investigate that later, but first he needed to get you out of the rain. 

He nodded. "Alright. It should stop raining anytime now, so I can't fly you out right now. How about we walk to my apartment and warm ourselves and then, I could take you anywhere you want?"

This was the best you were going to get. You know you need to leave the city right now, but he was your only chance of leaving. So you agreed. Hawks smiled at that. "Can you walk?"he asked you. You nodded, but as soon as you took a step, you yelped in pain, almost falling down. Thankfully, Hakws was near to catch you. He laughed. Noticing your chattering teeth, he gave you his jacket. "You're going to catch a cold." Once you had worn his big, warm jacket, he lifted you up into his arms and started walking out of the alley and towards his home.

As he got out of the alley, the street lights finally illuminated your face.

You looked familiar, like he'd seen you before, but he can't seem to remember where he saw you. His eyes scanned your face. Your brows were furrowed in worry, and you kept looking over his shoulder. You looked scared, almost like a child. Looking down, he noticed your pink dress was completely ruined. He moved his gaze to your feet. They were bleeding, due to the stones, twigs and broken glass that had pierced them. Your legs had tiny burns, some had faded, others looked still fresh.

Were you being abused? Is that why you're running? He wanted to ask you these questions but he knew he had to wait for you to open up.

"Thank you."your tiny voice brought him back to reality. Hawks gave his famous heroic smile. "No problem." You gave a tiny smile of your own. It was kind. "Why do you keep looking back?"he asked you. Your eyes widened slightly, looking like a kid who got caught stealing cookies. "Are you worried about them taking you away again?"he asked, not really sure who he was referring to. You started tearing up again. Your lips wobbled as you slowly nodded your head. He stopped walking, causing you to look up to him. "Its okay. I promise I'll never let anyone hurt you again. I promise." His voice held such sincerity, you started crying into his chest as you kept on thanking him.

Hawks meant every word. He's going to make sure nobody ever lays a finger on you. How could anyone harm such a sweet thing like you?

He rubbed your shoulder with one hand to calm you down. Once you had stopped crying, he spoke again. "Hey, look. It stopped raining." You looked up and he was right; the sky had cleared up. "Well, are you ready to fly?" You smiled slightly before nodding. He told you to hold on to him tightly, and you buried your face into his chest before he took off.

Once you guys were in the air, Hawks told you to open your eyes. You did and the view was breathtaking. Tall buildings and sky scrapers were all over the city, and tiny lights from cars and street lamps looked like stars. It looked like a scene from an anime. Really pretty.

"Wow."you finally said. Hawks chuckled at that. Your looked like you just saw Santa. So adorable.

"I'm glad you like it."he said, as he started flying towards his home. You smiled. "Hey! You never told me your name."he said, mocking fake surprise.

You giggled at that. "I'm Y/n."

And just like that, Hawks finally remembered where he had seen you.

A year ago Endeavour had asked him to find everything he can on this one particular girl. Hawks thought that maybe you were linked to some case, but your records were clean, so he thought that maybe Enji was just looking for someone for Shotou. Hawks thought it was weird when you suddenly disappeared from the public eye a month later. He tried to ask Enji about you but he would just brush him off, telling him he had mistook you for someone else. It was odd, but Hawks eventually let go of it.

Wait. Does that mean Enji had been hurting you? No, that can't be it. Enji had been working with him on a lot of missions abroad, and the burn marks on your legs were rather fresh. 

"Whats wrong?"your soft voice brought him out of his thoughts. "Hmm? Oh nothing. Why do you ask?"Hawks faked a smile. You stared at him. Something was off. "Nothing. Its just you were lost in your thoughts, I guess."

Hawks laughed at that. "You’re really observant, aren't you?" Deciding to test out his theory, he continued. "Well, you're right. I was thinking about a work colleague. You might've heard of him. Endeavour, hm?"

At the sound of his name, you stiffened, confirming his suspicion. You were connected to him somehow. Hawks didn't know how, but he was going to figure it out. "Um, y-yeah. He's the no.1 h- hero, right?"the fear in your voice had returned, although you were trying hard to hide it.

Hawks nodded. "Yeah!" He had to find out how you were linked to Enji. Suddenly, he turned around and started flying back where you guys had started.

"W-what are you doing? Why are we going back?"you asked him. He looked down at you and replied, "we need to get bandages for your wounds. Otherwise your feet will get infected." You nodded. "Oh. Okay." With that you closed your eyes to prevent them from drying against the wind.

After maybe half an hour or so, you opened your eyes to look where you guys were flying to. You looked down and to your horror, saw a familiar house coming up. You looked at Hawks and he seemed to know what you were thinking. "We're going down there."he nodded his head towards the Todoroki estate. Your eyes grew wide, and your body started trembling. "No! No! We- we can't! We can't go there!" You started shaking your head. "And why not?"Hawks stopped flying towards the estate, simply flapping his wings to remain in the air. You just shook your head. "We can't. I can't. Just drop me off somewhere else. I'll be fine on my own." Hawks wanted to know the real reason. He frowned. "Tell me the truth right now or I'll take you down there this instant."

You gulped, his eyes were showing that he wasn't bluffing. Your eyes started to glisten with unshed tears as you finally told him the truth. You told him everything; about how Enji had kidnapped you, how he got rid of your real family, how he and Rei had tried to keep you a secret from everyone, how their kids found out about you but instead of helping you out, became attached to you just like their parents, about how the famous villian Dabi was Enji's son and how he would sometimes burn you. By the time you were done, tears were flowing down your cheeks as Hawks tried to process what you had just confessed to him.

"Do you trust me?"he suddenly asked you. You looked at him confused. "What?" He repeated again. "Do you trust me?" Did you? Honestly, not that much, but he was the only one who was going to help you so you slowly nodded. "Yes?" Not really sure of it yourself but Hawks accepted the answer anyways. "Good." As soon as he said that, he started flying again, towards the house. You started thrashing in his arms again. "No! You said you wouldn't take me back here! You said you wouldn't!"you were full on sobbing against him, trying to wring yourself free from his vice grip, but Hawks was neither listening nor relenting his tight hold on you.

You looked down and that's when you saw them. Enji, Rei, all of them, were standing in the garden looking at you and Hawks. Even Dabi was there. Rei must've panicked and called everyone. And from the look on his- everyone's face, you could tell you were in deep trouble.

You thrashed in Hawks arms, begging him to fly away, but he didn't listen to you at all.

Once you reached the ground, you didn't pull your head out of Hawk's chest. You don't want to see their rage or the punishments they have planned for you.

"Hey, Endeavour!" Hawks broke the silence first. "Mrs Todoroki. Kids." He nodded towards them. "Hawks. Who do you have there?"Enji asked, pretending as if he doesn't know you. Hawks laughed. "You don't have to pretend! I know everything." At this, Dabi activated his quirk, ready to cremate him but was stopped by Shotou.

Thinking that this was some sort of blackmail, Enji asked, "What do you want? Money?"

Hawks smirked. "Nope! Look, I know you kidnapped her and all but you are providing her a good life, right?" He paused to look at them. Everyone nodded. He continued. "And you're just keeping her home to protect her from harm?" Again, everyone nodded. "But she still managed to escape you all even though she's quirkless and you all are not."

"Get to the fucking point."Dabi said impatiently.

Hawks sighed. "Clearly, you need all the help you can get. You need me. I can help you help her keep safe and healthy!" He paused, before his eyes lit up. "I can't have my goddaughter getting hurt again." Everyone looked at him weirdly. Goddaughter?

"How about you hand her over and you'll still be able to fly." Dabi threatened, blue flames engulfing his hands. Hawks laughed again. He was right. It wasn't Enji who giving you those nasty burns, it was Dabi. "If something happens to me, I have enough evidence gathered against you" he pointed to Dabi, "and then cops will get involved and maybe take away Y/n away."

The threat of someone taking you away from them, made their heart drop. Rei, who had been previously sobbing, put a hand on Dabi's shoulder, telling him to calm down.

Hawks grinned at Enji, raising his eyebrows. "So what will it be, Endeavour?"

Enji understood the ultimatum Hawks was giving him. Either let him in the family or risk losing you to the authorities. And he knew Hawks wasn't one to make empty threats.

Enji's eyes snapped to you. You were trying to bury yourself into Hawks chest, trying to hide from them. He wasn't that mad at you for running, more worried if anything. Had his family really spooked you that much? He'll have to worry about that later. First he needs to get you back into his and Rei's arms.

Enji sighed, before nodding. "Fine. We'll do it your way."

Hawks beamed at that. "Great!" He was glad that Enji had accepted. "Now, you need to take Y/n in before she catches a cold; although I'm certain she already has. Oh and tend to her bloody feet too! Poor thing was just running around barefoot." He chuckled. Shotou moved forward to take you from Hawks but you clung tightly to Hawks shoulders.

"Please. Please. Just take me out of here. Please." You whispered to him, fresh tears pricking your eyes now.

You looked so scared. Your eyes were saucer wide, nose red from cold and cheeks flush. Fear. That was were you emitting. But the longer he looked at your face, he found something else too. Hope. Innocence. Naivety. And while fear was the predominant emotion, the latter were the ones that he wanted to protect. "Hawks." Enji's voice broke him out from his trance. Hawks smiled. Addressing you, he started rubbing soothing circles to your back. "Hey. Hey. Its okay, princess." You kept on crying, your eyes begging him to whisk you away anywhere but here. You looked so much like him when he was little. So afraid. "Listen, do you remember what I promised you?" You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. You're so endearing. "I promised you that I'll never let anyone hurt you again, didn't I?" You nodded slowly. "I intent on keep that promise, dove. Infact I'll talk to your dad tonight! But you need to go in and take warm bath. I don't want you getting sick, okay?"

You had seemed to calm down as you slowly nodded and let him hand you over to Shotou, who quickly ushered you in, with Natsuo, Rei and Fuyumi quickly following behind, leaving Hawks with Dabi and Enji.

"Lets go to your office, Endeavour! I have to go over some details as Y/n's new godfather." Enji nodded and went inside to go to his home office. Hawks was about to follow but was stopped by Dabi. "What game are you playing, you freak?" 

Hawks chuckled, before swiftly pulling out a very sharp feather and pressing it against Dabi's jugular. "I'm just here to make sure that no one hurts Y/n again. And if I see another scorch mark on her, I'll find you and carve your skin into ribbons."

I will be accepting requests and asks for godfather hawks and Todoroki clan!

Oh and don't worry, I'm working on part 2 of rei hurting the reader. It'll be done soon! :)