#the chances of me doing that thing now go down to 0--}

[fireofamockingjay]

so I finished chapter one of Sunrise on the Reaping tonight. Here are my scatterbrained notes ^-^

Well shit Haymich’s birthday is reaping day. Damn.

Lenore Dove <— assumes that’s her first and last name.

Lenore Dove is repeatedly referred to as Lenore Dove like it’s her full first name: huh. oddly familiar. kinda like Lucy Gray is Lucy Gray.

Clerk Carmine <— WAIT. CARMINE IS A COLOR. THE COVEY SECOND NAMES WERE COLORS. LIKE LUCY GRAY. IS HE AND LENORE DOVE COVEY????!!!! stay tuned.

Abernathys were rebels. ✍️ interesting.

“You still sparking that Covey girl?” <— I KNEW IT ‼️ 

I find it interesting how Lenore Dove’s name is eerily similar to Lucy Gray’s. Lenore and Lucy are both ‘L’ names. Dove is a light shade of gray. ‘Baird’ is one letter away from ‘Bird’ and a Dove is a bird. Madam Collins dw I am picking up what you are laying down. 💪 🧠 

I am already seeing the connection between the Snow & Lucy Gray Era, this one, and Katniss & Peeta’s.

Lucy Gray —> Lenore Dove —> Katniss Everdeen. All three of them are Covey/adjacent. I bet this is relevant.

Coriolanus Snow —> Haymich Abernathy —> Peeta Mellark. Curiously, whenever we have a male POV, we don’t have a female one, and vice versa. I’m keeping my eyes peeled for any parallels between the generations.

Oh yeah btw *does a quick google search* cool that the POV characters’ names relate to nature (Snow = snow, Abernathy = river, Katniss = plant) and their love interests relate to birds (Lucy Gray Baird, Lenore Dove, Peeta Mellark)

And, I’m gonna take a guess here, but I presume since Snow lost it over Katniss’s name because Lucy Gray, if he discovers Lenore Dove, same thing will happen. Especially since she is openly Covey while the group has likely died out by Katniss’s time.

*remembers it’s four Tributes this year* I am now afraid. I know Haymich is one competitor, and — what’s her name. The girl he allied with. DAMN IT I FORGOT HER NAME. but who are the other two… 

Wait. But wouldn’t Katniss and Peeta have noticed if Haymich’s girlfriend was in the Games…? So it’s actually likely she’s not competing…?

Oh that scares me more because WHERE IS SHE IN THE TRILOGY THEN—

Alder quit psyching yourself out and keep reading.

“Not one of Burdock’s Everdeen cousins” <— AND THERE IT IS. So tree-wise Lenore Dove is on the opposite side of the family tree from Katniss, but still relatively related.

NEW SONG ‼️ can’t wait to hear it in the movie 👀 

HOLY SHIT SHE’S A BAIRD. SHE’S A BAIRD OH MY GOD. 

Ooo Lenore Dove you are becoming a favorite quickly. You rebel 👀 she’s like a cross between Lucy Gray and Sejanus.

MADAM COLLINS. A FLINT STRIKER. SOMETHING THAT CREATES A SPARK. WITH A SNAKE AND BIRD DECORATING IT. YOU ARE NOT TRYING TO BE SUBTLE ARE YOU LOL

but yes I see what she did there^ salivating.

CLERK CARMINE IS QUEER OH MY GOD YES. I have answers for long-brewing questions now. So going against romantic norms in the Districts (12 for sure, anyway) can get you harassed by Peacekeepers. How much do you wanna bet when it’s Capitol people no one gives two shits. *shakes hat* place your wagers here.

“No Peace” banners — AH THERE’S THE PROPAGANDA COMMENTARY I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR ‼️ 

Asterid helped a woman who was whipped… *glances back at the song that mentions a woman being flogged* interesting. ✍️ 

MAYSILEE DONNER THAT’S HER NAME

Wait wait wait. Burdock’s surname is Everdeen. He has a crush on Asterid, who specializes in apothecary. Burdock knows a lot about the woods too…

This is a dead ringer for Katniss’s parents :0 HER MOM WAS IN AN APOTHECARY I KNOW SHE WAS OH MY GOD HAVE I FOUND KATNISS’S PARENTS THIS QUICKLY??

OH MY GOD HAYMICH WAS FRIENDS WITH KATNISS’S DAD THEN OH MY GOD

man this means…Haymitch is literally the bridge between Ballad and the Trilogy. God I’m going to go insane over this…

*Woodbine Chance is drawn as the second boy*

Me: wait a minute. that’s illegal! Wasn’t Haymitch—?

Woodbine: *runs and is shot dead*

Me: shit they’re gonna redrawn aren’t they. FUCK. the odds really weren’t in Haymitch’s favor ooouuggghhh

[sluckythewizard]

'I wont cry for you, I wont crucify the things you do. I wont cry for you, see, when you're gone, I'll still be BLOODY MARY'

[icewindandboringhorror]

Recent life photos

[vaspider]

Listen to me. Listen very carefully:

They are trying to wear you out.

They are trying to wear you out, and they own most major social media now, along with many major media outlets. The disinformation machine is cranking along. You are going to have to slow the fuck down and read things before you help them wear out other people, too.

So you just saw a post about a real scary bill, hunh? Republicans want to make it a capital offense to pet dogs and repeal The Sky Is Blue Act of 1793, declaring the new official color of the sky to be squant? Damn, that sounds scary.

Let's go look up this fictitious "Make The Sky Squant Again Act" on GovTracker* & on the official legislative tracker on congress.gov!

Well, let's see... GovTracker estimates it has a 1% chance of even getting out of committee and a 0% chance of being enacted, while congress.gov says this bill has 2 cosponsors who have been in the House and combined total of less than a month. The bill doesn't have any actual text, and it was referred to 5 different committees.

That fictitious bill and a hundred others like it are quite literally not worth your time, and more than that, continuing to wring your hands about it and tell other people about the scary scary squant sky bill only does their work for them. It scares people, it makes them spend time and energy on it, and it wears them out. It is a legislative Gish Gallop, meant to throw so many things at people that we can't keep up.

Even calling or messaging your Rep in this case means their staffer has to waste time responding to you and letting you know that Representative Buttzonheads definitely won't support making petting dogs a capital offense, a thing that will never, ever happen regardless.

Staying engaged in this environment is going to require protecting your heart and protecting your energy, yes, but also protecting the energy of others. This is why WWII propaganda posters also included ones taking people to task for spreading panicky rumors and undermining morale.

Do you know why most observant Jews don't eat chicken and dairy together, even though the ban is on red meat and dairy together bc you're not supposed to cook the calf in the milk of its mother?** It's not because we think that chicken might secretly lactate or Just Because. It's because the rabbis decided that if I'm sitting out in public and eating turkey and cheese together, someone might glance at the turkey and mistake it for red meat and think, "oh, well, I know that Spider is a good Jew, there must have been a change, or maybe I can just justify it to myself that if Spider does it, it must be permissible to bend the rules just that much." And I would then be accidentally leading my fellow Jew astray. We are responsible for being even more careful for the sake of others than we are for ourselves.

It's the same principle here. We need to really be careful about the information we are spreading and check things past reading a news site. Is it true? Is it relevant? Is it meaningful? Is the news site one I recognize? Can I find meaningful independent corroboration on another site, which is to say, if I find an article about it on a second site, is it just quoting or rephrasing this site?

Yeah, that is a lot. But that's how we keep them from using us to lead our fellows astray.

*GovTracker is an independent site. They explain their methodology in their About section.

**I cannot say enough how I am not at this time interested in going on a Jewish Side Quest About Dietary Laws on this post. Usually, I love it, but hold off this time, please, y'all. Let's stay on target this once.

[no-144444]

Hii, you could do something for Paul. where the reader is an Alpine driver, and all the fans start joking that Paul is joining this year's wag. I don't know, I feel like it would be a lot of fun for both of us

wag or reserve driver? -p.aron

summary: the world sees how you respond to paul being announced as a reserve driver

pairing: paul aron x alpinedriver! fem! reader

a/n: thank you for requesting :)

୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅

alpinef1team

liked by paularon, youruser, pierregasly, and 896,365 others

alpinef1team We are thrilled to announce our reserve driver for 2025 will be Paul Aron! Runner up in the tense 2024 F2 title fight, we can't wait to see what he does for us this year. 🩷

comments

youruser WOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHH -> user7 she's so me -> user928 she gets me on a very deep and personal level

pierregalsy 🩷

youruser omg his hair is this picture... -> alpinef1team plz stop thirsting in the comments -> youruser prolly not...

user73 MY BOY! HE'S MADE IT OUT

oscarpiastri welcome to the big leagues buddy :0 -> user82 no way we gt oscar commenting on an alpine post before GTA 6. -> paularon thanks oscar :) -> youruser so you reply to him but not to me????? -> paularon you're beside me.

user81 y/n is so unhinged i love it

user92 @.alpinef1team what was y/n's reaction? -> alpinef1team totally normal :) -> paulron they're lying she burst into tears and I had to calm her down. -> youruser i hope you don't race at all this season.

user02 PAUL ARON IN AN F1 SEAT BEFORE GTA 6

user8 didn't know they were announcing wags now? -> liked by alpinef1team

-------------

paularon

liked by youruser, alpinef1team, pierregasly, and 765,352 others

paularon Wow. What a dream to be part of a Formula One team such as this. Thank you for the opportunity, thank you for the support, and thank you for taking a chance. Let's go racing. 🩷

comments

alpinef1team our favourite wag :)

--------

youruser

liked by paularon, pierregasly, landonorris, and 765,873 others

youruser does this bitch always have to copy me???? KIDDING! Yay, Paul is in F1! I'm so proud of my wonderful boyfriend to be coming into the big leagues with me! (ps, i'll pretend to be sick so you get a turn, but only if you actually make the fucking bed, yeah?)

comments

paularon thanks baby 🩷

user85 i in fact did not beat paul aron to y/n y/l/n comments...

user6 THEY'RE SO CUTE

user02 thank you queen for these wonderful photos of our man -> youruser just doing my duty ladies 🫡 -> paulron i'm just your boyfriend -> user7 incorrect, we're actually married! -> paularon ?????????

alpinef1team love for our favourite driver and wag :) -> paularon ???? I'm your reserve driver??? -> alexlabon nah mate you're just her wag -> youruser HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH -> paularon 👎

user9 the cutest couple together in one team!

pierregasly you're such a trendsetter -> youruser ikr

user6 is that photo from his first win in F2 when he ran over to y/n and hugged her so tight and then kissed her in front of everyone??????? -> paularon Yes, she took that one before I did all of the things you are describing. -> user62 MY Y/NPAUL HEART

landonorris @.paularon make sure franco doesn't steal your girl...🫢 -> youruser sadly I'm into blondes... -> paularon sadly??????? -> youruser no babe i love you just... blonde duded are the lowest of the low. not u tho... ha ha.

francocolapinto vamos! 🩷 -> youruser paws off my man -> francocolapinto i wish there was an eyeroll emoji -> youruser bitch there is 🙄 -> francocolapinto 🙄🙄 -> paularon 🙄🙄🙄🙄

--------------

youruser

liked by paularon, pierregasly, zakbrown, and 1,248,937 others

youruser so i got a podium in australia? wtf? anyhoo, back to work for next week!

comments

paularon that's my girl! -> liked by youruser

user664 DID YALL SEE THE WAY SHE RAN OVER TO PAUL? SHE LITERALLY JUMPED OVER THE BARRIER TO HUG HIM. UGH I'M SO FUCKING SINGLE

pierregasly MY TEAMMATE LADIES AND GENTLEMAN! -> usr9 pierre is such a girls girl

kikagomez my girl ❤️ -> youruser my queen

oscarpiastri podium in an alpine, do i hear goated? -> youruser WINNING HIS HOME GP? DO I HEAR CHAMPION? -> landonorris just say you hate me. -> youruser i fucking hate you. -> landonorris oh... nice.

user92 the way he was looking at her on the podium ❤️ -> user7 he's so pathetic and in love i need to fuck him. -> youruser me. -> user7 GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?????? -> youruser in my own comment section? I wonder.

alexalbon GOATED -> youruser ALBON IN THE POINTS? P5? GOATEDDDDD

user8 i love how the whole grid loves her, she's like their collective little sister ->liked by lewishamilton, fernandoalonso and lancestroll

user234 anyone want to talk about the last slide or? -> youruser idk i ship it -> zhouguanyu same lowkey -> logansargeant same highkey -> user782 LOGAN SARGEANT PROOF OF LIFE?

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paularon

liked by youruser, alpinef1team, oscarpiastri, and 2,176,573

paulron ok i guess i am her wag

comments

youruser yeah, you're getting it tonight 😈 -> liked by paularon -> francocolapinto PAUSE -> user8 Y/N! -> oscarpiastri omfg please be normal -> pierregasly 🐶 -> landonorris my eyes! -> youruser ok mister netflix and chill. -> user637 LIKED BY PAULARON? bitch why are yall FREAKYYYYY

user347 they're so fucking cute i cannot

user892 he's so in love with her it's insane

zhouguanyu she's literally my goat -> paularon mine too -> arthurleclerc weirdly enough, mine too -> liked by charles leclerc -> fredrikvesti same...

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navigation for my blog :)

alpine masterlist

[paper-mario-wiki]

wait so how did you get a "boring" office job? did you have to go to college or did you just apply for basic stuff and work your way up from there?

it was 100% through connections.

i mean, i actually GOT the job and have been able to KEEP the job because i'm smart and capable and good at doing things and have made the company a lot of money, but if i didn't know the right people i would not have even had a chance at it, and it would be disingenuous of me to pretend otherwise.

most of the moment-to-moment skills i use for clerical work (the majority of my job) i gained in highschool through my fascination with computers + all of the programming and software classes i took.

the business and accounting classes i took in university primed me for a basic understanding of how to run a company (or at least how to manage one, as my exact title is "Business Manager"), and all of my anthropology and sociology studies have given me a pretty keen insight for communication, which comes in major handy in a corporate setting. i was able to latch onto Corpo Speak pretty quickly, which has proven to be an indispensable skill (if a bit soul-sucking to utilize).

i got this job after receiving 0 work or callbacks from Indeed after applying to dozens of jobs over several months, which is a very difficult idea to reconcile with for me. i feel like im pretty capable, but apparently people whose job it is to give other people jobs don't agree. in spite of this, in 2 years ive generated hundreds of thousands of dollars of revenue for the company that decided to hire me because the owner saw me down on my luck and wanted to give me a break.

so i have to wonder, are we stupid, or are the companies stupid?

it's the companies. ive seen it firsthand. with this job, i go to business events and meet some of the most gullible people ive ever come across, and they're all CEOs.

they're so ravenously shortsighted with regards to their quarterly profit margins that they'd chase a 5 dollar bill the wind blew off a cliff for their shareholders. or more accurately, they'd push one of their minimum wage workers off the cliff to grab it.

because of that shortsightedness, conditions are getting worse, employment terms are becoming shorter, companies are shuttering left and right, pays are stagnant or lowering, and the growing number of people this inhuman greed affects are becoming more and more restless.

if you can't get a job in 2024, there's a very good chance it's not your fault. you shouldn't give up (unfortunately for now we still need to earn money to live in society), but try not to forget that.

[2-dsimp]

Off topic, when I read about Neinov the Toon, my first thoughts came to a game called Amanda the Adventurer. Idk why 😭

Anyway, are your plans would be Neinov coming to the real world, or Neinov dragging mc back to his world? 🤔

•:•.•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•

Yandere! Toon x Reader

•:•.•:•.••:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:

Synopsis: your past mistake from your old childhood days has come back to haunt you.

Cw: attempted kidnapping, obsessive, controlling possessive behavior, mentions of stalking, Neinov being delusional, non-consensual,

•:•.•:•.••:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:

“My partner! It’s you? Is it really you?”

A warbled voice addressed you, from beyond the fragile veil of where your reality clashed with the imaginary world of Cartoonz. A realm that was too warped beyond real life’s comprehension.

What the fuck was going on? All you did was turn on the damned tv to watch some classic cartoons. The one time your father left the remote out in plain sight.

You took a chance to sift through some channels, you were grown damnit! And yet he was still being such a helicopter parent. All because of an stupid accident you couldn’t remember for the life of you, that happened when you were a child.

“P-partner? What the hell? What is this? Who are you?!”

“Hey hey heyyy aren’t you being too cold? I’m Neinov your partner in crime, for life or death~ We used no—we are the best of buddies and more hehe!”

Your blood ran cold at the chipper response coming straight from the entity before you. Fingers desperately fiddling with the remote to turn off the malfunctioning tv.

As multiple gloved comical hands began pushing at the frame, trying merge out of the screen. Making the stand rock from the force of whatever thing was trying to come out. Suddenly, you heard your phone ringing, the set of rapid texts coming from your stern father.

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

★《You stupid child! What have you done?!》

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

★《I said you were forbidden from watching the TV! Quickly, pull the plug!》

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

★《Don’t let it crossover— it can’t—Die》

≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒ ≒≒

The phone, sputtered its battery suddenly drained to 0% shutting down completely.

“Ugh that vile monster, I mean your pops is still so persistent after all these years! Its unfortunate to leave him be for now, but savin you comes first!”

Neinov whistled flippantly, his gloved hands breached through the screen. But His face was still smushed against it. Rabid eyes wide with glee staring at you obsessively. His jagged teeth grinning widely at you. That motherfucker even threw a cheesy wink your way. As if this home invasion was a normal thing.

“Saving me? What are you even talking about?! This can’t be real it’s gotta be a prank!”

You’d sputter, trying to make yourself feel good with a white lie. but you knew better, those goosebumps upon your arm told you that you weren’t dreaming.

This felt to real to be a dream. So you scrambled to do something—anything. But did you want to risk getting snatched up by the now free roaming hands. Coming from the tv just to pull the plug? Or maybe breaking the screen would be better? The question is how? You didn’t have a damned hammer or brick on hand.

You didn’t take your father seriously when he warned you to stay away from tv screens. Especially during certain times at night.

You always thought it was some kind of boogeyman type scare tactic so you’d focus on school rather than goofing off online. But now you were at a loss, you were home alone, with a thing calling you its partner in crime.

All this overthinking wasn’t good for your anxiety. You weren’t the type to do well under pressure anyways so the best option that your body decided upon was to flee.

But in hindsight, you did recognize the Toon’s voice it sounded so familiar yet so distant from time. It carried a heavy twang like in those old 90s cartoons. However, seeing you try to escape the voice turned deranged.

“Ah aha oh You silly goose! Where the f*#% do you think you’re going? And my gosh how is this stupid censor not removed yet?!”

The toon’s colorful curses were censored with a bleeps and dolphin noises, as you were rendered immobile.

“I found you… All these years I’ve spent searching for you like a pin inna haystack. And now you’re right in front of me!”

Struggling, You desperately pulled and pulled only to remain where you once were.

“Hey I’m saving you right now, so you should be happy! And jump into my arms greetin me with a big ole a hug and a smooch! Cuz I’m your hero baby!”

Looking down that same gloved hand big enough to encompass your waist. Had a vice grip on your ankle, it tightened and with a sharp yank, you collapsed to the ground.

“Oh I get it you wanna get all glammed up for ya boy. But Yknow you don’t need any makeup, I like ya just the way you are babycakes!”

You started getting rug burn from being dragged across the carpet. By his noodle arms that acted like a sticky hand rope.

“So there’s no need to be shy! After all I’m bringing you back home! Where you belong.”

You were scratching, clawing with all your might to stay tethered to the floor. Neinov, merely found you to be playing hard to get. As he laughed in a bubbly manner, licking his lips as he finally pushed his head through the screen’s threshold. To be in the same space as his precious partner.

“Listen I know we’ve been separated for far too long huh? But Don’t worry! I’ll make you remember all the fun times we spent together just like the good ole days!”

———————————————————————-

A/n: nothing like some good cartoonish love 🤧

[gloomskulls]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ YELP REVIEWS [tasm!peter parker x reader]

pairings: tasm!peter parker x reader

⇢ ˗ˏˋ SUMMARY ୨୧ a fan decided to make an unofficial yelp page for spider man as a joke. A lot of clients...or citizens had so much to say.

⇢ ˗ˏˋ WARNING ୨୧ none

A/n: Just a random short fluff. I'll go back doing dark stories once I feel like it. I haven't really used Yelp, but my friend gave me this idea lol, so credit to Angelina lol. Don't steal this coz I'll shave your head.

Peter slumped on the couch scrolling through his phone. He frowned intensely and tapped a link you had just sent him, headlined as "Spider-Man Yelp Reviews"

You leaned against the door with a stifled grin. "Found it while looking at reviews for that new pizza place. Thought you'd get a kick out of the comments from your…clients."

Peter groaned. "Clients? I'm not running a business. What is this?"

Thumbing through the reviews, he cycled through disbelief, frustration then finally wounded pride.

2 stars

"He saved me from a mugger, but he sailed so quickly I didn't even manage to get the chance to say than you. Really rude."

3 stars

"I appreciate the help...however, he left me dangling from a lamppost for 20 minutes until the cops arrived. You could have just dropped me on the ground bro."

4 stars

"Brilliant rescue, but my phone screen got cracked when he yanked me into a speeding car. Thanks, I guess"

Peter threw his head back, exasperated. "Cracked phone screens? I'm sorry, Janet, would you prefer to have been hit by the car?"

"Peter, this is gold," you dropped beside him taking the phone to scroll further. "Ooh, look at this one!"

1 star

“I yelled for Spider-Man to come help me when my cat was stuck in a fire escape. He didn’t show. What’s the worth of a superhero when they won’t even help the little guy from time to time?”

"That wasn't even a crime," Peter exclaimed with hands thrown up. "What do people expect me to do run a cat rescue hotline?"

"I mean…isn't helping people your whole thing? Even the little guys? Or, in this case, little cats?"

He narrowed his eyes at you. "You're enjoying this way too much."

"Oh, I'm loving it." You scrolled to another review.

3 stars

"Got my purse back after it was snatched, but when he handed it to me, he just said, 'Here ya go,' and left. No photo, no autograph. Kinda rude."

"Oh no, Peter, how dare you not stay for selfies mid-crime fighting?" You snickered.

Peter dragged a hand down his face. "Am I supposed to throw a meet and greet after every mugging? Should I bring merch? Web-slingers for kids? Spider-Man action figures?"

You wiggled your eyebrows. "Don't tempt me to start a side hustle."

He shook his head, scrolling further. His eyes widening in disbelief at the review.

1 star

"I yelled for Spider-Man to help me with my groceries. He didn't show up. Ended up dragging six bags up five flights of stairs by myself. What's even the point of having a superhero if he doesn't help the little people?"

Peter let out a strangled laugh. "Groceries? I have to save people from groceries now?"

"Be honest," you teased. "If you would have heard her, would you help?"

He hesitated. "…I mean, maybe. If I wasn't busy."

"Softie," you said, poking his cheek. "You're gonna carry someone's Costco haul one day; I just know it."

Peter groaned louder and clicked on another review, muttering, "It can't get worse. It can't possibly—"

0 stars

"Spider-Man swung by my building and broke my balcony railing. Now my landlord's charging me for repairs. Thanks, webhead."

"Oh," you managed a stifled laugh. "Isn't that the guy from your last patrol? You know, the one who yelled at you when you were chasing that car thief?"

Peter buried his face into his hands. "It's not my fault that balconies are so flimsy in the city. It's very hard to swing around without hitting something."

You patted his shoulder soothingly. "Don't worry, hero. I'm sure you'll get your Yelp rating up again. Maybe even start a loyalty program? Save five, get a free coffee?"

Peter shot you a look, betraying irritation and amusement. "You're impossible." You just grinned menacingly at his words.

"Hey, look at this one," you said, stealing the phone and scrolling to a five-star review, finally. "Finally, some love."

5 stars

“Spider-Man saved my dog from traffic. My girlfriend thinks he's cute. I do too, honestly. Would let him rescue me any day.”

He blinked. "What…what does that even mean?!"

"It means you’re the city’s hottest, most eligible bachelor,” you said, draping an arm over his shoulders. "Even dogs are falling for you. Can't blame them."

He rubbed his temples. “I think I need to retire. Or move to a quieter city. Do they need Spider-Man in, like, Ohio? Whadoyo think baby?”

You smiled and opened the Yelp app. “There, there, hero. I’ll fix your reputation." You assured him as you patted his back

Peter leaned over, squinting as you typed. “What are you— '5 stars. Spider-Man is amazing. Handsome. Athletic. Definitely has a great butt' Babe!" He read out everything you typed for him as you clicked the submit button

You winked. "Just telling the truth. Besides, if you're going to be stuck here, you might as well be a five-star hero."

"Unbelievable," he muttered, but the corner of his mouth twitched up in a smile.

@gloomskulls 2024, DON'T COPY, TRANSLATE OR USE OF MY WORKS IN ANY OTHER WEBSITE. Photos don't belong to me

[beelee-cotton]

‘𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄

“A good day starts with a great cup of coffee and your smile .”

Summary : Jesse was a regular at the small , but known coffee shop you owned . It was safe to say , the two of you were great friends . I mean , c'mon , most people knew it by the way you leaned over the counter to hear his jokes and the way you laughed when he'd try and fail miserable to flirt with you

The more he stayed around , the harder you fell in love with him . You couldn't help it ! He was kind , smart , friendly and good looking . Or was that the coffee creamer gettin' to your head ?

Genre : Fluff , angst , coffee shop au , from friends to lovers

Airing : Jesse x Barista.F Reader / Friends to lovers / Dina x Ellie / Joel / Jesse x Tommys Daughter.F Reader / Coffee shop Au

WARNING : Fluff , angst , smut? , violence? , mature language , mature themes

( there will be warnings on each chapter yall don't worry your pretty little head off :0 )

DISCLAIMER : this fanfic does not go along with neither the game or series , it is fictional . The characters are pretty much the same but some maybe be a little out of character but probably not ? I don't know if there will be smut considering im not good at that shi—

The familiar chime of the bell signaled that there was another customer. Your coffee shop had become quite busy over the weeks, even though it had been open for some time

But that’s just how things were

"I'll be with you in a moment!" you yelled, quickly pulling off the mitts you had just used to take out the freshly baked cookies

"Don't worry about me, sugar," a familiar voice said, one that always seemed to bring a smile to your face. Jesse.

"Since it's you, I'll probably take even longer," you joked softly, setting the mitts aside

You turned around, hands resting on the soft plush of your hips. Jesse was leaned against the counter, wearing a grey turtleneck, black trousers, and black sneakers

"That was uncalled for," Jesse mused, lips curling into a smile. You didn't know what it was about that smile, but it made your heart skip a beat , each and every time

You snorted, strolling up to the counter and grabbing the small notebook to write down what he wanted, though you already knew what he’d order

"What'll it be? Cowboy?" you asked, looking at him

Jesse smirked, crossing his arms over his broad chest as he replied,

"The regular."

"Coffee and a chocolate brownie , comin' right up," you said, sliding the notebook into the pocket of your white shirt

"You know me so well," Jesse snickered, watching the way your hips swayed to the beat of the music playing in the coffee shop

"Unfortunately ." You replied

(Five minutes later)

"Here ya go, Jesse. Coffee with three sugars, stirred twice, and one chocolate brownie."

You placed down Jesse's order, and he perked up at the sound of his name, smiling. But instead of grabbing the two right away, he looked up at you.

"Hey, uh, Y/n?"

You turned

"Yeah? Is somethin' wrong? Did I make it—"

"What? Oh nah, you made it the way you normally do. I was gonna ask you somethin' else," Jesse explained.

You let out a sigh of relief but gestured for him to go on, resting a hand on the counter.

"Are you, by chance, free this uh..."

He checked his wrist, and you raised a brow.

"Jesse, you don't have a watch." You deadpanned , looking at Jesse with a 'You good?' Look

"...Shut up. Anyway, I was asking if you were... free on Friday," he admitted, straightening up a little, like he was nervous

"Oh, er... yeah, I am actually. Why'd ya ask?" you said, curiosity creeping back into your voice

"Do you wanna go out, or like hang out with me? That's not in your café?" he asked, taking a sip from his coffee now that it had cooled down enough.

Was he asking me out on a date? you thought, quickly pushing the swirling thoughts away.

"Sure. But where?" you replied.

"Maybe a picnic?" he suggested.

"Sure, sounds like a me and you thing. Mostly a me thing, but you're a bonus," you joked.

"Okay, meet me at 4 PM. Wear something nice and comfortable... or just wear... you?" he shrugged , gesturing to yourself

"Sounds like a date," you smiled.

@wintfleur

[teddy06writes]

Whumptober Day 16 - Umbrella Academy

Umbrella Academy (unit) x sibling!reader

Prompt: I did good, right?

Trigger Warnings: Canon Typical violence, major character death, one (1) swear from Diego

Summary: A mission gone wrong forces you to over use your powers, pushing you too far. Readers powers are a bit under described, the general idea is that they can manipulate time, which ends up backfiring.

Reader is referred to as Eight.

This mission wasn't going well. Maybe you should've have taken Ben's feeling that something was wrong more seriously. But what could you have done? Refused to go and face worser punishment?

The more you thought about it, you had no clue what your father was thinking. The Umbrella Academy was powerful, yes, but what were a group of twelve year olds to a group of terrorists with a bomb?

Around you, Luther, Diego, Five and Allison were grappling with the terrorists, fighting for their lives, if you were honest. Whoever the hell these guys were supposed to be, they were well trained. Somewhere, Klaus was supposed to be freeing hostages.

You chuckled to yourself, bitterly.

They had all gotten the easy jobs.

You knelt before the bomb, desperately trying to discover a way to diffuse it without setting off it's fail safe. At your back, Ben stood on guard, having taken down the few men that were devoted to watching the bomb.

"Any chance you've figured it out yet?" Ben asked, ever impatient.

You swallowed thickly, brushing hair from your face with the back of your hand, "Not exactly."

"And how much time do we have?"

Your eyes flicked back to the tiny, taunting LED screen and it's ticking clock, "About 90 seconds."

"Should i-"

"Shut up and let me think!" You snapped.

You had already managed to pry open the casing surrounding the eternal wiring, it was just a matter of making sense of what you found there. God, maybe you should have paid more attention to your fathers lessons. Or maybe he should've diversified the systems you'd had to practice on.

The seconds ticked on, and you looked miserably down at the floor, "If I had more time maybe-"

"Hey dumbass," Diego yelled as he went running by, "That's your whole thing!"

Five, who had been hot on his tail skidded to a stop besides Ben, "You haven't figured it out yet?"

You gritted your teeth, "No, brother dearest."

"You'd better get on that."

You glared up at him, "No shit."

Allison appeared, tugging at the back of Five's blazer, "Come on, we have to go help Klaus with the hostages."

You took a deep breath, blocking them out, and drawing on your powers. The world around you began to slow, until your siblings were hardly moving.

The count down clock wavered, before stopping with a bright 0:45.0809 frozen into its face.

You took a moment to breathe, watching the final 09 slowly tick to a 08. This was certainly the slowest you'd ever brought time to, and you could already feel it beginning to drain you.

Now, with more time than ever, you set back to work on defusing the bomb before you.

~~

What felt like nearly an hour later, (the count down clock only read 0:45.0789 when it stopped), you removed the last wire, confident that the bomb was finally inert.

From there you began the simple but satisfying work of finishing the mission before the rest of your siblings could, pulling Luther's hardly moved body out of the way to drag the last man over and tie him with the others.

You also took the liberty of untying the hostages, posing your siblings ludicrously and tying Diego's shoelaces together.

You gave your handiwork a satisfied once over before drawing on your powers again to speed time back up.

Only, nothing seemed to happen.

You tried again, clenching your fists and focusing.

Time seemed to start to speed back up around you, but some invisible force was holding you back, making your movements slowed and sluggish.

With one final burst of energy, this time focused on yourself, you seemed to rip back into the correct time- and promptly fell to the floor, utterly exhausted.

When you went to push yourself up to see the looks on your siblings faces when they realized you'd gone and done everything without them, your arm seemed to buckle beneath you.

"Eight-" Allison gasped, looking at you with wide eyes of terror.

"Ally, whats-"

Ben was crowding into your side suddenly, trying to sit you up, "Hey, hey, what's going on, what did you do?"

"What-" Your head was suddenly swimming, and you couldn't even bring yourself to laugh when Diego tripped over himself trying to cross the room.

"What did you do?" This time it was Five demanding it, looking over your in confusion and horror.

"Somebody call Dad!" Luther was demanding.

Somewhere, Klaus was making a noise of panic, and scrambling off to wherever your father had been watching all of this.

You looked down at your hands, suddenly finding them worn and wrinkled, "What's going on.... I-"

Ben stared down at your rapidly aging face, "Eight, hold on, Dad's coming. Dad's gonna fix this."

"I did good right? I- I stopped the bomb-" You were just so tired, but Ben kept shaking you. Allison was at your other side, clutching at your hand.

Behind the cluster of your siblings heads, you could see Diego and Klaus pleading with your father to do something.

"Number Eight has brought this upon themself. Had they kept up their studies, or maintained vigilance during training sessions, none of this would have happened...."

You tried to squeeze Allison's hand, but couldn't find the strength, "I just need some rest, Ally, I just need to sleep this off..."

Your eyes were just so heavy. Even if you weren't giving in to the feeling of sleep, pulling you deep into the darkness, you wouldn't have been able to fight it.

"Eight- eight!"

[crustyfloor]

Link to the translated Q&A Vivinos and Qmeng had recently.

....Guess that means it'll be very long (hopefully) and very good? honestly just scared for what round 7 will bring, it's probably gonna be the last round in the series, and with all the tension buildup this'll be stressful i assume

Yeah, Luka was set to be a popular figure from the jump, there was no way his trick with the Sua imitation was more than just a power trip (Or just a genuine mental break on Mizi's part). because either way with the way Mizi was holding herself up during round 5, she stood 0 chance against him.

Luka, just like the others doesn't actually have real control over his position in Alien stage. So in order to set that boundary for himself and others he uses his presence and the stage because, in any other context, he is simply just a tool and a frail (old) man. (And he has in-universe stans how beautiful)

More Luka lore please vivinos....

Kinda glad this got changed, because imagine this cute guy gradually turning into the Ivan we know now and then doing the shit he did in round 6? then doing the dream face reveal showing that he never truly changed, he just had a mask on. that shit would be 10x more devastating (even though the way it is now is just as devastating) Ivan and Luka twins (scary stuff but quite intriguing, even now they're still quite similar in some ways)

Augh...it is true though. Aliens and humans are just far to vast in traits to relate to each other on such a level, this reminds me of Mizi and Guardian Shine. Guardian Shine might've been the only guardian shown in the alien stage cast to actually be kind. She even seemed to be crying when she had to send Mizi away to go to Anakt(?). I find it kinda sweet though, that the ones who do actually care really show it and try even if they can't understand their pets that well.

But I also like the more grim side to it, because when you don't understand something specifically another being in this case you're less likely to have sympathy for it. Humans and Aliens don't have any relatable traits so whatever these aliens do to the humans whether for self-pleasure or such. And lab-mice? that confirms lab-rat theory. Alien stage crew were all just succesful experiments and the bad batch are kept behind for further testing i theorize. but its still pretty vague so we'll see. hopefully things get more grim ((

......What are you hiding Vivinos. (she rlly said do your homework....okay mum...i will catch you...)

A story about the death of close loved ones and how that can affect characters who are alive in the long run. im gonna throw up.

(NOT AGAIN WITH THE DEAD WIFE PARALLEL MIZI IS NOT HIS WIFE-)

"Ivan is the perfect man" 😭 I love the details of round 6 clothing so much, even I got that superior or dominating aura from Ivan when I first saw him in round 6 (💀) there wasn't really much to his outfit but the way he carried himself in it kinda just gave off that idea that he's the one in control here. but gradually, we can see that facade fade as he got more into his feelings the more he sang and sunk down to a level where he was most natural. eugh.....

[quill-beetlewing]

I've just re-read the short lived duel that Aeneas and Achilles have in Book 20 of the Iliad and it's actually the most hilarious fucking thing.

So it starts out with Apollo disguising himself as Lycaon, one of Priam's many sons, and telling to have a go at Achilles. Keep in mind that this is post-Patroclus Achilles. Aka: berserk Achilles. Aka: so fucking mad he would fight a literal river Achilles.

Aeneas, who is capable of critical thinking, says he doubts he can actually take him on. He also references a time when he was herding cattle on Mount Ida and Achilles ambushed him, adding that the only reason he survived then was because Zeus gave him enough strength to book it (cracking up the official times that he's been saved by a god from certain death to 3, you go dude!).

However, after a bit of back and forth and a ton of hyping up on Apollo's part, Aeneas decides to try anyway.

Like, what could possibly go wrong?

Achilles notices Aeneas charging at him and he begins to taunt him. It's something among the lines of: "I'm sorry, are you, background trojan character #61, actually gonna try and beat me? And then what? Do you think that Priam will reward you in some way? Maybe making you king after him? Well it's BULLSHIT, because Priam fucked so much that your chances of succeeding him are basically 0. Ahah. Loser."

Now, you'd think that maybe Aeneas got enraged at the comment and attacked him, or maybe he even got scared and backed down, but NOPE. What does Aeneas do?

Well, first of all, he insults Achilles' insults, comparing his bickering to that of a child. Literally, "I heard third graders do better than that." And then he decides to list his and Hector's entire fucking family tree.

You know that part of the Bible that's like "this guy sired this other guy, and this other guy sired yet another guy" and so on? It's basically that.

So after he's done with all that, Aeneas states that while he'd love to have a battle of insults with Achilles, because according to him he's actually very good at insulting people (his words, not mine), they should probably throw hands now. Achilles agrees.

The duel is shortlived and Aeneas gets his ass handed to him. Badly. As expected. And he's about die when ✨️POV shift✨️ we're not on Olympus where Poseidon, Hera and Athena are watching this absolute train wreck go down.

Poseidon, pitying Aeneas, suddenly goes on a rant. It's something among the lines of: "come on guys, look at him, he's just a little guy! He literally has no stakes in this war, he doesn't deserve to die here! He even gives us lots of gifts and sacrifices, he's literally such a nice guy. How can we do this to him!?

...oh and also he's part of some prophecy, Zeus would get mad if he died."

The fact that the way it's worded makes it sound like Aeneas being part of a literal prophecy is an afterthought to him absolutely floors me, Poseidon is literally just attached to a random dude that's fighting on the opposite side to his because he thinks he's nice.

After all that Hera is pretty unimpressed and states that she really doesn't care if our man lives or dies as neither her or Athena have ever saved a Trojan from death, she however adds that Poseidon is free to do whatever he wants.

The literal moment Hera stops talking, Poseidon lunges down from Olympus and onto the battlefield to look for the two combatants. When he does, he saves Aeneas like only he can do.

You know how when Diomedes first tries to kill Aeneas, Aphrodite gently folds her hands around him to shield him? There's none of that here. Poseidon just runs up to him and literally flings the motherfucker.

It literally says that he flies "high in the air". It's like a Looney Toons sketch.

So Aeneas lands and, while he's obviously a bit dazed, Poseidon proceeds to call him a madman and essentially tells him to never do something stupid like that again and just wait until Achilles is dead, then he'll be able to murder Achaeans to his heart's content. Aeneas is fine with that.

Achilles, who just saw his opponent just get yeeted into the fucking sky, just shrugs and goes "welp, guess that guy's off limits, I'm gonna go kill someone else now I guess lol".

This entire scene is pure fucking gold and the fact that I've literally never seen anyone talk about it just breaks my heart.

[dark-lord-of-awesomeness]

When I first read your cat Stan fic I spent a while thinking the plot was going to go much different than it did and I still can’t stop thinking about it so. Here’s my old theory lol

I thought that the people Stan owed money to (Rico?) would follow his car once Carla took it to try and get their money. They knew Stan wasn’t there to give it, but maybe they could pressure the next of kin. Only they knock on the door and boom, there’s someone who looks just like Stan. They assume Stan just faked his death to get out of his debt, so they start getting ready to pummel Ford, who is very alarmed and confused. Cat Stan flips out and helps distract them while Ford gets some anomaly thing and scares them off. Afterwards Ford is PISSED because what the hell was Stan doing? Those guys were dangerous! But then he starts thinking more, and oh gosh, what was Stan doing? Those guys were dangerous! That’s what Stan was dealing with? It’s the push that makes Ford start thinking about Stan again and truly worrying. Meanwhile Stan is like “I can Never let him know because he will Hate Me Forever”.

Anyways yeah it’s been in my mind of like a month since I read the fic lol. I love how the fic actually went and I adore your writing style, it’s so good and Emotion :D

That is an interesting direction for the fic to go! I'll admit, it never really occurred to me to add people from Stan's past, as by the time Carla took his car he'd been a cat for 3 or 4 months, only 2ish of those with Ford. He'd been assumed dead by everyone since he'd just vanished like he did, either by a random incident or potentially someone else getting him for his unpaid debts.

I'm also not to good with writing about gangs and such, as it's not really a genre I watch in my day to day.

But you're completely correct in how the Stan's would react. Ford would go from 'what on earth is stan doing that there's people like this after him' in anger, to 'oh my God. What is stan doing that people like this are after him' in worry. He's still mad at Stan, but Stan's also his brother. His twin! And he's been missing and dangerous people are looking for him and failing and Ford has the portal to work on but he can't focus with the worry clouding his thoughts.

Stan, on the other hand, doubled down on 'guess I'm a cat now' since all he sees is the initial anger then the muttering as Ford goes back to his day to day. Fords worries are unspoken, because the moment he says anything it might become real and he refuses to acknowledge the thought that Stan might not be around anymore to be mad at.

I think it'd end in a comedy routine of Ford snapping and like, trying to summon Stan or use a locator spell to find him and then just getting frustrated because Nikola keeps contaminating the spell somehow. Everytime he tries to scry on Stan he just sees his cat. Every time he tries to teleport Stan to him his cat yowls as he pops into existence in Fords study. Eventually he just throws his hands up and uses some high powered blood spell to do it, then yells when his cat shows up! What's he doing wrong here! He's done everything by the book, inspected every ingredient, with 0 chance of Nikola getting into anything-

Then it just hits him as he's holding Nikola and scowling that the only reason this would happen is if the spell thinks his cat is stan. Just stares at Stan, who's vibing in his arms while his thoughts go crazy, then goes into a flurry of magic tests to see what on earth is making all his spells think Stan's a cat. Is it intent? Is it because Nikola used to belong to Stan? Is there a spell at work? ghost?

Ford has to figure this out pronto. Shoves the portal on the back burner while fiddleford and Carla watch him run around his study like a mad man flinging all kinds of things at his yowling cat.

Then Stan pops into existence screaming at magic test 300 and drops like a sack of rocks when he's too heavy for Ford to keep holding. Very awkward for him, and now Fords getting all red because all his spells were working perfectly, his brother was just a cat.

[mypoisonedvine]

virgin neil lewis with 11: “fuck, do that again... please."

your work is so fucking good i LOVE it

thank you so much love!! i got so many amazing neil requests but I love the idea of virgin neil c: kinda made him an incel lowkey...

warnings: noncon sexual content (18+ only!!), perv!neil, grinding, neil being a creepy nice guy with 0 stamina (aka my exact type)

100 random prompts - send me a number and a character!

Neil could be a little bit... well... touchy.

You mostly didn't mind it. It was just his way of being friendly and he usually made you laugh with the way he would randomly hug you from behind or tickle you or playfight you just to hold you down.

Every once in a while it would get weird, but not too weird; just his dorky, goofy sense of humor taking a jokingly-horny turn.

Well, you thought he was joking.

Like, for example, today—when you were on the couch arguing over what to watch (a common occurrence).

“No way,” he shook his head, “it’s shlock!”

“Just because it had a big budget doesn’t mean it’s shlock!” you defended.

“Oh yeah?” he challenged with a smirk.  “Just read the box!”

He snatched the DVD case out of your hands, flipping it to read the back as you tried to pull it away from him.

“In a world,” he began reading the synopsis in a deep, dramatic voice.  “See?  No good movie starts its premise with in a world—”

“Shut up!” you whined.  “Reading the back is cheating!  Gimme it!”

You leaned over him, trying to grab it, but his arms were longer; he held it up high and tilted his head back to keep reading: “In a world devastated by nuclear war—”

“You’d like it if you gave it a chance!” you insisted.  You couldn’t reach as high as him from where you were sitting, so you thoughtlessly hopped into his lap and lifted yourself up to get closer.  He yanked it away again, leaning to the side and watching you as you laughed and groaned and tried to get it away from him.  “You just need to see it, then you’d like it!”

Three things happened at once, right then: you moved to try to get the DVD from him, twisting yourself in his lap; his other hand grabbed suddenly and tightly onto your hip; and he stopped laughing.

You didn’t really notice it at first, just happy you managed to snatch the case from him.  You only really realized something was different when you looked at him with a smug grin which fell quickly.  “Neil?”

His lip was between his teeth, and his face was a little flushed.

“Neil, what’s wrong?” you wondered, relaxing on top of him, which only made you put more pressure against his— oh.

“Fuck,” he breathed, holding your hips with both hands now, “do that again… please.”

“What the fuck?!” you snapped.  “Are you— is that—?”

You tried to get off of him, but he was holding you down.  Your face flushed as you suddenly felt self-conscious about everything you’d done— about wearing these tiny lounge shorts, about getting in his lap, about coming over to see him at all.  He rocked his hips slightly under you, and you whimpered as you understood, without a doubt, that he was rubbing his erection right against you through his pants.  You could feel it throbbing, even.  You weren’t sure what was worse: the possibility that he got that hard that fast because you were in his lap, or that he’d been hard before when you two were just hanging out.

“Let me go, Neil,” you demanded, but your voice was weak and shaking; he ignored you, looking down at you in his lap as he moved you on top of him.  “Neil, stop—”

“Fuck,” he sighed, “you’re warm.”

He did it again, again; you felt sick and strange and sort of numb as he held you tighter, groaning under his breath.  “This isn’t funny,” you whined, “this is—what the fuck, dude—”

“Sorry,” he panted, moving you faster over him, and you grimaced as you were forced to feel the details of his cock against your pussy.  It was disturbing, really, how well you could feel it with these clothes in the way: you could feel the ridge of his head, the shape and thickness of his shaft…

You swallowed, blinking quickly, not really believing that this was happening—this couldn’t be happening, right?  Not to you, not with Neil, it just didn’t make sense.  “Stop,” you begged again, quieter yet more desperate than ever.

“I will, I will,” he promised, “I’m so close— I’m almost done, then I’ll stop— fuck!”

He tossed his head back, and you felt it flexing.  You watched in shock, confusion, and disgust as a small stain began to form on his shorts, hot come soaking through the fabric as his chest rose and fell quickly while he caught his breath.

You were speechless, and confused, and you had pins and needles all over as you tried to convince yourself that didn’t just happen— that your ‘friend’ hadn’t just used you to come, holding you down and rubbing you against him.  You’d felt so helpless and dirty… so why was there a wet patch in your own shorts, not from coming but from unsatisfied arousal?

His grip relaxed on your hips, and you could get up, but you were still frozen.  If you moved now, you might have to acknowledge that this was real. 

“Okay,” he smiled, still breathing a bit heavy, eyes still shut with relief, “we can watch your movie now.”

[runa-falls]

scratches and bites - 3

pairing: miguel o'hara x reader

warnings: explicit 18+, use of demeaning names, biting/marking/scratching, use of venom, a small amount of blood, unprotected sex, creampie (whoops), cumplay (whoops 2x), slight size kink (whoops 3x), bondage (0-0), feelings (bleh), needy wittle miguel :P

a/n: uhhh, this may have gotten away from me -- went from 1k to 4k real fast (or slow bc i'm a slow writer hehe)

summary: miguel o'hara is a grumpy man and you make him grumpy. you regularly go against his orders, create chaos, and invite danger. this is what happens when he's had enough.

w/c: 4.2k

series masterlist | main masterlist

----

“Clean-up crew is on the way. You,” He points sharply in your direction, “come with me.” He roughly passes by you, purposely clipping the edge of your shoulder.

You sulk slightly and follow him into the portal, mood effectively ruined. 

Everything worked perfectly in your eyes. You were able to save the family and a few people inside the building. You even had time to pick up a free hotdog.

“It’s on the house for you, Spider-Woman! Thanks for saving the day!”

“Aw, thanks, dude.” 

Of course, before you could take a bite of your well-earned lunch, O’Hara’s hulking figure was standing over you. He’s angry. 

Gwen wisely scurried off before you all got to the portal and Jess had better things to do than deal with whatever was going on between the two of you. So you’re effectively alone now. Great.

“The fuck did you think you were doing out there?” Miguel’s voice booms off the high ceilings of his office as he leads you toward his desk. He has this pretentiously slow platform that he loves to use to look down on people. You feel like a student that got called to the principal's office. “You could’ve gotten yourself killed–or worse, gotten someone else pulled into your fucking mess.” 

You roll your eyes as soon as he passes, “Oh, come on O’Hara, you were about to bail on a car full of people and left a bunch of workers in the crumbling building because nothing is more important than your dumbass box of scraps and wires!”

He turns stiffly, jaw clenching at your words, but his eyes roam to anything else in the room but you. Like always. “You know we’ve been looking for that equipment for months. If we have any chance to hold back this multiverse annihilator even a few days, we’re gonna take it.” Miguel is as curt as ever, stance stiff as he tries to pretend he’s unaffected. Like he’s convincing himself he’s doing the right thing. And what you did was wrong.

“There were four of us out there, Miguel,” His eyes briefly meet yours at the sound of his given name. Something he has rarely heard you say since you’ve been in Nueva York. “The package was barely a struggle for one of us! You’re telling me we needed four hands to locate and retrieve that shit?” You gesture over to the crate resting on his computer platform. 

He sighs like he’s tired of hearing your voice. Tired of being in the same room as you. His hand smooths over his face, “That’s not the point, Kid.” You could feel warmth blooming inside of your chest at his choice of words. It’s demeaning, and he knows it. As much as you hate him right now, you’re also loving this. You’re finally getting the chance to express all the frustration he’s inspired in you. And it’s satisfying to watch him get all wound up because you actually made the right move. He just can’t admit it.“What you did was beyond idiotic. You could’ve–”

“Well, I didn’t. And I’m not a fucking kid.” You spit out the words. His eyes immediately darken as you raise your voice. Bright cherry to rich blood.  

Miguel rolls his shoulders back from annoyance and briefly closes his eyes. Irritated. You seem to always irritate him. His jaw is tight, and right under his full top lip you can almost make out– “What did I say about interrupting me?” He’s seething, head tilted slightly as pushes away from his desk and off the platform to you. 

His deep voice is so low that you swear you can feel it surrounding you, vibrating the warm air that clings to the thin treads of your suit. “You’re so…” His fists clenched tightly and tension rolls off of him, crashing into you like a wave. “Difficult.” You try to stay brave and hold your head up, unwilling to cower under his superficial anger. “So fucking irritating.” 

This is getting nowhere.

“So that’s why you called me in, hm?” Your voice comes out more breathless than you intended, but really, it’s his fault. This whole time he’s been inching closer and closer to you, taking up all your space. “To call me petty names? Tell me all the things that are wrong with me?” You have to crane your neck to maintain eye contact with him, he’s so close. 

“No.” He drawls the word, his voice deep and muffled. Then you realize. His fangs. The stark change of the air in the room was enough to make your breath hitch. You suddenly feel trapped. 

“I brought you here,” There are only a couple of inches separating your chest from touching his and you swear you can feel his body heat radiating off of him, almost simmering under his suit. “To teach you a lesson.” He leans down slightly, closing in the height distance between the two of you. You haven’t been this close to him since that night. 

“W-what kind of lesson?”

“The kind that’ll persuade you to follow the rules.” Your knees nearly buckle as each word is lightly whispered next to your ear. He keeps his hands to himself, but it still feels like he’s wrapping himself around you. “To listen to me. Like a good girl.” Just as your body begins to mirror his and lean into his space, he backs up and strolls back to his desk. 

Your eyes instantly lower and stay locked onto his spotless steel floors as you listen to him slowly walk away. You feel your face heat in embarrassment as you become more self-aware of the way your body reacted to him. He hadn’t even touched you. 

“Come here.” Your head tilts up slightly at the sound of his voice. He’s sitting back on his desk chair, legs spread confident and inviting as he watches you watch him through hungry eyes. He can tell your mind is brimming with overlapping thoughts as you decide whether to listen to him or not. 

Some part of you worries you’re being lured into a trap. That O’Hara, one of the least genuine people you know, is playing with you. But your body doesn’t really seem to care, already moving until your ankles meet the edge of the barely floating platform. The air around you is cool and empty without his presence. Your body craves more of  Miguel’s natural heat.

“...Closer.” You shuffle over until you’re a couple of feet away, fingers twisting together with uncertainty. He’s looking at you, leering at you. Virtually devouring you with that scarlet stare of his. If he wanted, he could reach over and pull you closer, eliminating the space between you, but he decidedly doesn’t, clearly wanting you to come to him. 

“Don’t worry, honey, I don’t bite – oh wait,” He grins at his own joke, fangs proudly poking out from under his plump lips. You don’t realize how hard you're biting your lip until it starts to seriously sting. Your teeth release your aching lip and his gaze follows the action before meeting your eyes. 

“Unless you want me to.” You haven’t uttered a word in a while and you don’t really want to. You’re completely content to continue to soak in the words that slip from his tongue. “Do you?” 

Yes.

“Do I…”

“...want me to bite you.” He openly runs his soft tongue over the contours of his fangs. 

Yes.

“B-bite…?”

“Mhm. Make you all numb and pliant for me?” He finally reaches over and gently tugs you closer by your arm. You let him. “That what you want, hermosa?” Your body slots seamlessly in the space between his thighs. His face cradles perfectly into the crook of your neck. You sigh, subconsciously leaning closer as his tender lips hover sweetly over your covered throat. 

He whispers, barely audible against your skin, “Promise it’ll only hurt for a second.” 

Yes.

“Yes.” 

He doesn’t waste any time. 

A hand drifts up your arm to the flexible collar of your suit. He tugs it down lightly, revealing your bare skin to the cool air. It’s not enough for him. With a hushed tear, he uses a claw to split the fabric down to the top of your shoulder, giving him more access to your body. He pushes your hair back and nudges himself closer to you, nose nestling where your neck meets your shoulder. He breathes you in. “Sweet.” His voice barely carries with how soft he says it.  

The balmy heat of his breath sweeps along the side of your neck before his lips finally connect. His hands trail against your waist, slowly caressing you as he slowly presses kisses into your skin, trailing his lips down until he finds the spot. You tilt your head to the side as you feel the light scratch of his fangs. 

“Hold on to me, baby.” Your gloved hands grip his thick forearms. He bites down. 

It hurts in the beginning like you thought it would. Like he said it would. You try to disguise your wince, but you can’t stop the way your body flinches at the sensation. It’s intense, the sharp pain, and it spreads, traveling down from your neck to your toes. 

And then, something clicks. It vanishes. That ache gets replaced with an endless warmth that relaxes every muscle in your body. Your hands, once clenched around Miguel, begin to loosen so the only thing that’s holding you up is him. 

Everything touching your skin feels amazing. The heat of his hands. The suit that's starting to slowly fall down your shoulder. 

Your eyes glaze over with pleasure as you watch him pull away from your body to look at you. His tongue pokes out, swiping over his bottom lip to collect the mixture of residual venom and your blood. Are you bleeding? You lean closer and your hands reach out for his shoulders. 

“That good, hm?” Even his voice feels good. 

You use his solid form to keep you steady as you boldly crawl onto his lap, “Really, really, good.” He hums and you feel his chest vibrate against yours. His arms easily wrap around your form as he waits patiently for you to get comfortable on top of him.

In this moment you realize how this will change everything. And you’re not talking about the bit.-- Ok, not just the bite. 

It’s seeing him like this that flips your world. Feeling his touch. The gentle way he holds you against him and the patient way he lets your fingers trail down his strong chest until you’ve decided you’ve had enough. He makes you feel special. Wanted. Everything that you’ve craved since you followed him here. The same thing he offered you before taking it away. 

So you’re scared. You don’t know if you could ever let this go because you know you’ll always yearn for moments like this. If he pushes you away again…

The fog in your head dissipates and it’s like you’re waking up. You catch his eye and his brows furrow. He senses something’s wrong. His hand cradles yours and gives you a comforting squeeze. 

“What is it?” 

“Don’t leave me.” 

“What do you mean?” His eyes are sincere as they try to read your crestfallen expression. 

“Just…” You exhale slowly and rest your forehead against his shoulder. “Don’t do this then walk away, Miguel.” Your words hang in the air for a few seconds as he takes them in. 

Great, you ruined the mood. “Look, Miguel, I–” He softly lifts your head and leans in to press his forehead against yours. You’re so close he could probably feel your eyelashes brush against his cheeks. 

“Sweetheart, I’m not going anywhere.” He draws you in and kisses you deeply, taking your breath away with his tender touch. It feels like a promise like he’s signing the dotted line of your heart. “I’m yours.” It’s whispered against your lips when he pulls back and you can help the grin that sprouts from his words. He matches it. 

“Yeah?”

You’re pulled back in, “Mhm…” Muffled, but absolute. 

Kissing Miguel is exactly how you imagined it to be: addictive. 

Maybe it’s the residual venom left on his tongue, but the way he moves against you, mouth and body, makes your legs tremble. Makes you ache for him.

You melt against him, drunk on his taste and leaning in for more. His hands go from cradling your face and delicately tracing your neck to massaging your thighs, hands practically draping over you with the size difference. 

He delicately licks into your mouth, greedily taking in every aspect of your taste. Your lips vibrate excitingly when his tongue brushes against them, they’re super sensitive from how long he’s been working them. 

You feel him under you, nestled achingly against your ass. He throbs eagerly every time you let out a breathless sigh or a muffled moan. You’re no better. You swear you already have a wet spot ruining your suit from all the times he ‘accidentally’ grips his claws into the curve of your hips.  

You whimper quietly when you feel the sharp point of his fang drags ever so slightly across your bottom lip. As he moves downwards, it delicately tugs at it, briefly revealing the bottom row of your teeth before releasing it. He moves his mouth along the line of your jaw and then focuses on the sensitive bite he left to bloom red and purple on your neck. 

With his hands back on your waist, he starts to lick up the small droplets of blood that were staining trails down your shoulder. It stings wonderfully as he laves against it, cleaning the red off your smooth skin. You can’t help but to cry out as he begins to suck at your sensitive skin, it’s a bit more intense than you were expecting, but it feels really good. He blows cool air on it when he releases your skin, soothing the new mark he’s left on you. 

His mouth is back on yours, letting you taste your own blood as your tongues intermingle with fervor. Fingers tug at the front of your suit to pull you impossibly closer as your teeth nash against one another. You hear a faint rip between you as his grip tightens and pulls at the stretchy material. Your skin quickly reacts as the cool air wraps around you, arms prickling with goosebumps and nipples tightening into hard buds. 

You both pull back and look down at the damage. Your suit is split down the middle of your torso, revealing everything from your heaving chest to your belly button. Your body ignites with heat when you notice how his crimson eyes drink you in. A soft growl vibrates from his chest. 

“Miguel, this is the only suit I have.” 

“My bad.” Zero remorse in his voice. Asshole. 

He abruptly grabs both of your wrists and pulls them behind you with one hand causing you to arch your back, inevitably giving him a better look. “God, you’re sexy.” His other hand slowly molds over your waist and smooths it upwards to grasp your tit with a playful squeeze. Using his gloved thumb, he teases the soft peak of your nipple, flicking it once just to hear you gasp. He does it once more, grinning (with his fangs cutely poking out) when you react the same way.

“Miguel…” You whine out, pouting at his teasing. 

He idly drags his claws down your stomach, enjoying the way your breath hitches when he gets closer to your center. “You always go without a bra under there?”

“It’s a tight suit.”

“It is…” His hand trails down to your inner thigh and you shift slightly, leaning back so he can touch exactly where you need him. He gets the hint and gently cups you over your damp suit. “And here…?”

Your bottom lip tucks into your mouth as you look up at him, nodding softly. “And there.” 

You’re suddenly being carried by Miguel, weight supported by his strong arms. You have to quickly wrap your arms around his neck to keep yourself from falling backward. He hurriedly takes you over to his desk and sets you down at the edge of the waist-level table. 

He is so tall that you struggle a bit to keep your hold around his neck so you settle your hands back on his chest. You push at his firm figure and sit back to fully take him in. “And how about you?”

“Me?”

“Do you wear anything under that unbearably tight suit?”

“I do, actually. Wanna see?” 

You’ve heard the rumors of Miguel’s nano-suit, but you’re still perplexed when he grabs his interdimensional watch from the desk next to you. He clicks a couple of holographic buttons and you watch in awe as his suit seems to dissolve off of him, one particle at a time, like it never existed in the first place. The fading red and navy reveal his perfectly muscled body, somehow making him look even bigger in front of you. 

He did, in fact, have some briefs on under the suit, but it’s what’s under it that catches your attention. Your thighs clench together as you watch him set down the timepiece, his arm unintentionally flexing under the dim lighting.

Miguel returns to you and you spread your legs slightly so he can stand directly in front of you. You slowly reach out to him, palm to the skin, and soak in the natural heat of his body. You can feel his heart beating under his chest, slow and steady. 

“You’re hot.” 

He has that teasing grin back on his face, “Am I?”

“I mean…warm.”

He shrugs, “Us Spiders run hot.”

Miguel moves your hand off of him and sets it on the table before pushing his body closer to you, making your legs push out further. He leans in so close that you have to slowly tilt your body back with him. “Bet you’re warmer.”

 He shifts your body further onto the table and then starts working on the rest of your suit. It tears easily from your body, scraps falling to the floor until you’re fully bare in front of him. You pant as you watch him and feel your center pulse in reaction to his rough handling. “There we are.” His voice is soothing, but his eyes flash dangerously. You arch your back slightly as his claws scrape lightly over your stomach to your most sensitive area. You don’t even have to look down to know you’re dripping, you can feel it all over your inner thighs. 

His fingers glide over your glistening lips, spreading your eager wetness leisurely. His claws are gone. You watch his face as he stares at his actions, his hungry eyes dark with lust. You both groan when one finger dips in, pushing gently against your entrance. You’re practically gushing around him as he starts to move, wet sounds accompanying each thrust. A string of slick follow his hand as he pulls away and it drips carelessly on your flushed thigh. With hooded eyes, Miguel holds up his dripping finger, “Open.” You suck on him enthusiastically, holding his gaze as it’s slipped into your mouth. “Fuck.”

His briefs are shoved down his muscular thighs before you can look down and you’re shoved roughly onto your back. You feel his claws dig into your thighs as he spreads you out for him, pushing them back until they're next to your waist. His warm hardness slides against your weeping pussy, covering him in slick as he prepares himself. 

Your breath hitches as his cock pushes inside of you, nearly stretching you to your limit. You try your best to take deep breaths, but it’s hard when you can literally feel each inch sinking into your body. A throaty groan rumbles in his chest as he feels you involuntarily clench around him, invariably sucking him in further. His eyes are almost glowing with how bright red they are. “Relax for me baby, I’m almost in.” 

Your thighs tremble under his hands as he continues to plunge in deeper, unable to keep up with all the stimulants surrounding you. The feeling of him dragging against your walls is exquisite and you can barely hold yourself back from cumming right there. 

Then he starts moving. 

His hips drag back, pulling almost all the way out before he buries himself back inside of you. Your head tilts back with pleasure and your eyes squeeze shut, you can’t even tell what you’re holding on to. He keeps this slow pace, body nearly engulfing you as he hovers above. A moan follows each thrust as he fucks you into his desk.  

When your eyes are finally able to flutter back open, you meet his stare. You quickly attempt to hide your face with your arm, too embarrassed to hold eye contact with him while he’s using your body like this. He doesn’t like that. 

Your wrists are forced above you and then expertly webbed together to hold them there. His red webs pulse hot around your wrists. Unlike the traditional webs that tend to feel like cool lace, his are warm, like fingers wrapping tightly around your wrists, almost thrumming with soft heat in a way that makes them feel alive. 

You yelp when his hand tugs sharply at the hair at the nape of your neck, forcing your gaze as he moves over you. “Look at me, baby.” You listen. He begins to aim his thrusts upwards into you, nudging against that special spot inside of you. And as hard as you try to keep looking at him, your eyes inevitably roll back as he hits it so precisely. You faintly see stars. 

You cry out as heat blooms your center and your thighs close around his hips, tightening as a spark swarms in your lower belly. “That’s it, baby,” He speeds up, feeling you start to clench around him, “let go.” 

Your vision blurs when your climax blasts through your body. Hot tears spill from the intensity of the feeling, creating hot trails of wetness over your cheeks. “Such a pretty little thing." He wipes them away lovingly. Your body jerks with pleasure and Miguel has to hold your waist down as your back starts to arch off the desk. 

He doesn’t stop. If anything, he starts fucking you harder, letting his body weight hold you in place as he chases his own high. You whine against his neck, skin sticky with sweat, as he roughly ruts into you. “Be mine, baby, and I’ll take care of you forever.” His claws dig into your web-pasted wrists as he works himself into you, post-orgasm slick smothered carelessly over the both of you. “I promise.” He whispers breathlessly next to your ear.

“Please.” The word is nearly stuck in your throat as he continues to take everything your body is willing to give him. He’s basically grinding his cock into you now, wanting you as close as possible for these last moments. You barely hear it but he whimpers against your shoulder as he starts to draw closer to his climax, desperately rutting his hips against you. 

With a choked-out groan, his movements grow sloppy and he thrusts deep inside of you a few more times. You feel the warmth of him as he spills inside of you, filling you up to the brim. He’s panting above you, body weight nearly smothering yours. You love it. 

He slowly pulls out once he’s calmed down, eyes locked onto your leaking center that’s full of a mixture of you and him. His fingers lovingly spread his cum over your pussy and you flinch as he slides against your sensitive clit. You give him a look of disapproval which he ignores as he pushes his mess back inside of you. 

“Will you let me out of these now?” You pull at the webs, still holding your arms above you.

“Hm…I think I’ll keep you there for a little bit longer.”

–

His office is like a bat cave when you’re barely dressed. There’s a slight breeze in the office (you have no clue where it’s coming from) that’s making it particularly drafty. You force Miguel to huddle over you like some oversized puffer jacket as it was his fault the only clothes you came with are lying on the floor in scraps.

“How am I supposed to leave when my suit is in tatters?”

His arms hold you tighter, “You aren’t. You’re staying with me.” 

“Miguel, people are probably looking for us by now.”

“I don’t care.”

“Miguel.”

“Alright, fine. You can borrow one of my nano-suits, but we’re going to my place.” 

“Dude, you’re like 6’3”, how am I supposed to fit into one of those?”

He tsks, “Really? You’re calling me ‘dude’ after all of this?” He grabs his watch again, scrolling through some settings. “It’s nano-tech, sweetheart, it fits what I want it to fit.” He dials the size down, letting you watch as the hologram shrinks to display your general size. “And I’m 6’7.” 

-----

taglist: @deputy-videogamer @syd-vixious @bachirasbasics @danaeaurelia @reuxxi @halparkebitch @kittekat420

[outsideratheart]

41 with Alexia

41 //looking at their lips as they talk// 

The sun shon bright in the Barcelona sky as you stood pitch side ready to report on the infamous El Classico. It was a match that you loved to play in but you picked up a serious ankle injury a couple of months ago and you weren’t quite fit to play or even to train yet.

5-0 was the end result yet throughout the halftime and post match media you tried your best to remain fair even though everybody knew you bled Blaugrana.

Like always the team did a lap of the pitch. You knew they were getting close as the fans behind the camera erupted, all of them wanting a shirt signed or a photo with their favourite player. So whilst you did expect to see one or maybe two of your team mates what you didn’t expect was to feel a hand of the small of your back and the sight of Alexia standing next to you. Here she was, the woman who hated doing media with every fibre of her being, voluntarily giving an interview.

“Ladies and Gentleman, La Reina herself”

The use of the nickname she loved to hate earned you a playful shove.

One of the official presenters made the most of having both you and Alexia in an interview given that you hadn’t done for in months. Much to you surprise Alexia was in a chatty mood and you spent most of the interview taking in her beauty. It wasn’t a huge secret that you and her were dating but you never got round to doing a hard launch so to say.

You notice some of Alexia’s hair fall in front of her face so as if by instinct you place it gently behind her ear. This earns you a look off Alexia as if saying are you going to do what happens next when you do this at home. It’s safe to say the thought did cross your mind but you knew now wasn’t the time or place. It didn’t stop you from glancing down at her lips as she spoke about how proud she is of the team. Her passion is one of the things you loved most about her and you know the look in your eyes will show this but you didn’t mind.

Alexia’s hand squeezes your hip, an act which she knows will earn a reaction given you’re ticklish.

“Que?”

“La pregunta?”

You turn your attention to the presenter and it’s clear she asked you question.

“Lo siento” your cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

“Don’t apologise. Alexia gave us everything we need about the game and I’m sure you gave us enough material to make the fans happy”

You both thank the presenter and Alexia waits whilst you give back your mic pack. The two of you are some of the last players on the pitch and walk into the tunnel together. Even though you weren’t playing you did plan on joining in on the locker room celebration but just before you reach the door Alexia grabs your wrist and pulls you back to her.

“What?”

“I thought maybe you wanted to look at my lips some more seen as though you refused to look at anything else out there”

“Why you got to call me out like that?”

“I’m not. I’m simply giving you a chance to do something other than stare”

Alexia’s lips was on yours before you had to chance to reply. She has you pinned against the wall with no care in the world who could see you. Alexia rested one hand against the wall beside your head and her other grabbed your hip. Yours travelled up her back beneath her loosely fitted leather jacket.

For a brief moment you forget where you were and when you felt Alexia’s tongue brush against you lips you allowed her entry.

“Well well well, look what we have here. Our dear captains the celebration are in the locker room but I can see that you are having a very good time out here in the hallway” Mapi says rather smugly.

“Leave them alone Maria” Ingrid pushes her towards the locker room “Not that I want to interrupt but the rest of the team is on there way so you might want to go somewhere else if you want to continue”

All three of you begin laughing at the situation and whilst you wanted nothing more than to pick you where you were before getting interrupted, you knew that it was best to be done at home away from prying eyes and teasing team mates.