#the book is really fucking good btw
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ok i haven’t posted anything abt jatp in a while but i was reading “stay with my heart” by tashie bhuiyan (really good book, btw) and there’s a song name at the beginning of each chapter and:
I THINK IM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND??? OH MY GOD????????? I AM LIKE ACTUALLY OHFNSKFLSLK????
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Have you heard of the "Crowley is Malleus' dad" theory going around? Where Prince Levan (or whatever his name is) didn't actually die and just went out to get some milk and is now known as Dire Crowley, the silly man? The implications of that theory is absolutely hilarious when you think about it
hold on, we can figure this out, we just need LISTS
PROS THAT CROWLEY IS SECRETLY REVAAN/LEVAN/LAVERNE/WHATEVER:
unspecified fae of some kind, with similar coloring to Mal
the animal masks are apparently a Briar Valley thing
has some kind of big blackmailable secret that was alluded to in episode 4, and then as far as I know never brought up again
(unless this was just Azul bullshitting, which is extremely possible)
based on Diablo, which...maybe means something?
has canonically worn Dad Shorts
CONS:
(gestures to Crowley's entire personality)
NO LISTEN Revaan was the guy they sent off on diplomatic missions and to take care of delicate political situations, and...look, I love this dweeb, but would you trust Crowley to be in charge of negotiating your war treaties
despite my brain insisting on reading his name as "Raven", Revaan's title does imply that he was also a dragon (or super into longan berries, I'm not ruling that out)
currently unclear why Lilia "my closest friend Revaan...he is no longer with us...I used to make fun of him for being kind of a priss about eating jerky..." Vanrouge has somehow not noticed or said anything
Malleus' Aloof Anime ~Aristocrat~ vibe had to come from somewhere, and by all accounts it was NOT his mom's side of the family
???:
turns into a bird in the opening, I don't know if that means anything but it's kinda cool, I guess
all that aside, if Malleus and Yuu are any indication, then the Draconias have...questionable taste in their social choices. so anything is possible!
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#disclaimer that this is half joke and half speculation so like. please take it in good spirits and don't yell at me#right now i'm leaning away from crowley being revaan because i think the evidence is currently circumstantial at best#but who knows what the future will bring!#man. whenever i consciously remember that crowley is diablo it also reminds me#that his name is supposed to be pronounced like dear and not like the word dire#which always fucks me up a little bit. this is the worst thing about him bar none.#damnit crowley#anyway every time a new part comes out i rewatch the opening just in case there turns out to be any more foreshadowing#(there never is)#(but that ONE really quick bit where you can see overblot azul means i always have to look)#which is to say i have been carefully reanalyzing all the crowley bits and i have reached the conclusion#that i still have no idea what is going on with him#he may be the world's biggest mastermind or the world's biggest idiot and these are not mutually exclusive#(this is a strictly pro-crowley post btw)#(i'm allowed to make fun of him because i love him dire-ly)
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thanks hanif. cool and normal as always!
i ALSO wish more people talked about the moments that build up to a potential brawl as intimacy.
#this is a library book. so i need to save insane paragraphs any way i can before i start hunting for a used copy#this is a little devil in america btw. really fucking good#abdurraqib#words#h#i can’t keep all the pictures of books i’ve read in my phone anymore so they have to go somewhere#sports writing#<- i’m counting it.#hw
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It's really interesting that Wynne actually has quite a measured, bordering on downright sympathetic response to hearing what Jowan did in the prologue -- if the mage Warden says "I still can't believe Jowan was that stupid", her answer is something like a thoughtful "Stupid, or desperate, or merely curious?". She seems to think of Jowan as a kid who got in over his head, rather than any less charitable interpretation. I do believe she genuinely is as against blood magic as she publicly expresses and as the Circle party line demands, but as a private person she clearly has a more nuanced and potentially kinder understanding of the reasons why someone might resort to it, at the very least.
(related: when she says that part about Irving telling her what happened, there's no dialogue option in the first stage of the conversation (except choosing the 'leaving the conversation' one) that doesn't net you +2 approval! no matter how the warden feels about it, she is ready to recieve it. I think that says something sweet about how Wynne conceptualizes younger mages and the honest real affection she has for them. if you didn't snitch on jowan and say you stand by that decision, though? +3 approval, apparently! what Wynne says and what Wynne thinks is not always the same thing indeed, her idea of where personal loyalty and integrity stands vis-a-vis a mage's responsibility to the circle may be more flexible than she'd have people believe, you'll be surprised to learn lol)
I have always liked wynne and found her interesting, in all her hypocrisies and her earnest care, but with slightly older eyes she's extra fascinating to me in the same ways that Iron Bull is -- seeing someone whose mind has had hollows carved out in it by the need for double-think and compartmentalization imposed by the oppressive systems and ideologies they live under, and the quiet fight of the self to still preserve vital parts of itself that the system deems unacceptable in the hidden backstage areas of the soul, as it were. (and for both of them part of that self is love and protectiveness of specific other people, beyond what their 'role' dictates is acceptable for them.) I think Wynne has managed to sneak more of her internal self through the meatgrinder relatively intact than Bull overall, but it's the same logic underlying it, for me, and it makes me feel such intense affection and compassion for them both to see how hard they try
#dragon age#dragon age origins#wynne#iron bull#my warden and wynne actually have quite similar feelings and views about the circle so it's really interesting#conflicted love is one hell of a tradition to pass down and boy do they do that lmao look the circle really is a family!#it has intricacies of intergenerational trauma being inherited and everything#I think sophia reaches the 'ok. alright. I'm going to stop being polite pretend centrist about this' stages earlier#but her being more open about it is mostly about her being uniquely protected by her role in the wardens#(and being the king's if-not-for-the-laws-of-this-land-and-the-finer-points-of-political-marriage wife lmao)#and knows it; she has less to be responsible for in the circle itself now. I think she and wynne Understand each other by then#asunder is a book of. many parts! let's say lol but wynne's characterization in it is so good#she was about to go absolutely nutso mode after stuff started to go south and I love that for her#her gloves have been on her whole life but oh she is aware of that and would have taken them off and then some in that moment#the older you get the funnier wynne actually being like 50 gets tho. oh no. at death's door. ancient. aged. she has outlived the ages#how the fuck old is irving btw since he's alive and kicking during the ending of asunder (<3 love you dad)#also. yes. yes I am still on my iron bull bullshit I may never truly be off it he makes me so impossibly sad and so insane
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Books of 2024: LEECH by Hiron Ennes.
This is a reread for me! I first read it when it came out in 2022, and it absolutely rewired my brain. It does so many fascinating POV things that I adore, and I'm excited to revisit it with ~Vague Recollections~ of plot reveals to see how many of them I spot ahead of time this go-round.
#books of 2024#leech#book photo#my photography#book photography#DEEPLY fucked up and weird book btw#very gothic#very cold#but gosh what a way to use POV#what an examination of trauma and autonomy and personhood#YOUR HONOR I LOVE LEECH#will try to post more better thoughts after#i'm reading it too fast (i'm behind. again. forever) for a real close deep dive like i'd envisioned#but gotdamn it's still good#the voice really is perfect peak driscoll at the beginning too#knowing it's based on the canadian rockies this time is helping tbh#i really did picture like. france. before.#but nah it's canada lmao#THE LANGUAGE USAGE IS COOL TOO#i recognize frenchish but it's like. drifted. from either modern or regional i can't quite tell#it's neat though#WHOLE BOOK NEAT CHECK THIS OUT#but mind the content warnings...#hiron ennes#my b for typoing the author name first post lmfao
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How tf does Dogman manage to have a better redemption arc story then Hazbin Hotel
#Petey gets so much time to redeem himself into becoming a better person in a comic where shit and piss can come to life#Meanwhile Angel dust is just suddenly like guys…. I don’t want to do drugs this one time and I helped my friend once lol#And then heaven is like omg why ISNT he in heaven?!?!#WHY DOESNT HEAVEN KNOW WHAT MAKES SOMEONE GO TO HEAVEN???? HAS VIV READ THE BIBLE???????#Anyway Dogman is a good kids book go read it lmfao#Like Petey has so many times where he fucks up but manages to do better even after all of that#And he even has the emo backstory too so ☠️☠️☠️#hazbin hotel critical#I do like Hazbin btw but damn it’s so rushed and it makes me sad!!!! Why didn’t they spend the Episode time they had better tf#Like there are so many unnecessary characters tooooo like you really don’t have to make it this cluttered omg#But that’s unrelated lmao
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I am so tired of how Quotev/Wattpad level fanfiction, written by what reads as a 15 year old getting into their first fandom, gets pushed up the book ratings in the gay romance genre (m/m). Why is Red White and Royal Blue always at the top. Why is Boyfriend Material. Why must I suffer. Where are the standards. Why is a 30/40 year old recommending me, a grown adult man, stories that feel like they were written for highschoolers who don't like to read so they pick up the trashiest, most easily digestible shit in order to have the bare minimum of fun while doing their reading interpretation project for class.
This is coming from someone who had fun reading goddamn Twilight by the way. I'm not a book snob. I can enjoy objectively bad media if it's fun. My favourite book series with LGBT main characters is All For The Game, and that's a shitshow! But at least there's passion in it! There's fun!
I am going insane!!!!!
#my new technique is seeing which gay books tiktok hates#I always like those#honestly I think I'll just drop romance books entirely by this point.#fanfic is usually so nice to me on the romance department anyway#why am I paying for subpar shit that a goddamn fic author on ao3 does perfectly and better#i am so tired of the current state of popular romantic gay books#feel free to rb btw this is not a deeply personal post or anything#i am so tired#how the fuck are popular gay books so low in quality#like its not even about taste and opinion it's about straight up standards#like aristle abd dante is an objectively good book even though I was meh about it#I might not have personally enjoyed it that much but I can give it high praise#but boyfriend material? the american british one? really????#i liked the gentleman's guide when I first read but... I went back to it and it's kind of meh too#but when I first read it I was the target audience so. i can give it a decent rating too I guess#even though the characters are... kinda flat#aaaaaaaaaaa#I am so done#gotta start ignoring book recs and look for books with like. 2 reviews#unblemished by tiktok#published out of blood sweat and tears
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Forever fucked up over the fact that sometimes you have to write the thing you desperately want to read/watch because it doesn't exist yet
#this isn't about fanfiction btw dfghfds#i love writing but at what cost !!! also in this economy ???#and all of my ideas are so niche and silly but at least i have a feeling my dad would love them !!! we have a similar brain#inherited the brain while i also inherited his entire face#anyway one of these days i'm going to write a long rant about how almost EVERY novel that takes place in the middle ages -#- takes place in fucking england and has something to do with monarchs or the construction of a church.#or it's all fantasy OR the story of king arthur a hundred thousand times.#don't be a coward. tell stories about non-english commoners. and stop making the crusades sound like a noble thing.#were it not for The State of The World and the Economy i would quit everything and write movies and books#because all of my writing is very visual. like i think a lot of my ideas would translate better on film.#ohhh you know what it is? a lot of these books i'm thinking of are written by historians and i think historians of the english type -#- get really hard over royals and famous battles and such.#and that's all well and good but it's not very accessible to readers just starting out in the genre. i've complained about this before lol
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not to brag but i've read no less than three books with gay stabbing scenes so far this year 😎
#hope the trend continues#one thing about me is that i will always appreciate a good Gay Stabbing Scene™#it's about the thin line between love and hate; between violence and intimacy.#it's about passion turning sour; about loyalty giving way to betrayal. it's about choosing such a close - almost tender - murder method.#it's about the inherent eroticism of penetrating someone's most vulnerable parts#it's about knowing only one of you can survive and it's going to be you. it's about loving someone enough to let them kill you.#it's about blood that will forever cling to your hands. a guilt that will haunt you for the rest of your life.#but most of all it just really fucking slaps#i didn't know any of these books had gay stabbing scenes going into them btw i think i've just developed a good intuition re: books
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Rereading any of the multiple parts of TCY where Japeth is just. actually going insane and being a loser feels like this sometimes. yknow what i mean bro was STRUGGLING
#alternative caption: japeth's celestium live experience#but there is at least one scene in every book he's in where someone beats the shit out of him and it's so??? brother what are you doing#he gets put in a fucking bag in book 4. he later almost gets incinerated#in book 5 he gets scalded by boiling hot chocolate (funny as hell by dot btw)#in book 6??? ?? ??? ? hort literally almost kills him. sophie literally almost kills him. tedros you know what you did#and then he like. actually does get killed#Soman CLEARLY didn't intend for the reader to sympathise with him until book 5/6 and it SHOWS#sigh. why is he like this#its worth saying that i do think the Japeth Spiral Of Decline does actually start after like. book 1 + aric stabs rhian#which is largely why i think he's like That in TCY. but he is a still a massive loser for those books and it's REAAAALLY funny#and is also why i would Like more book 1 japeth content i need to see what he's actually like??? ? ?#we only Really see that in F+B and near the end of book 5 (not when he's killing rhian there is a difference)#sge#tsfgae#school for good and evil#the school for good and evil#sfgae#japethposting#this is one of my many posts where the tags are very much an important part of the post lol#does this make sense to anyone but me? let's find out
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Emerges from Hell Followed With Us covered in blood.
Hey :]
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RIP nat you would've loved the album Haunted by POE
#the sun vanished#thesunvanished#nat#music#idk man it just seems like the kind of music she'd listen to to me#its also the companion piece for house of leaves (a REALLY good fucking book btw) so i think she'd listen to to while reading the book too#this is a very big hear me out situation LMAO#more of a personal headcanon than anything
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I keep picturing Luke like how he is in the show 😭
#i do that for everyone#but like#i like blond luke more#i need to find rlly good luke art so i can imagine it#IM REREADING THE BOOKS BTW#i started them like#a year and half ago#and i just got the new goddess book#and i’ve finished the hidden oracle#but i didn’t really read during the summer and took a month long break bcs of school after i finished the hidden oracle#so i decided to just reset myself#:DD#pjo#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson#luke castellan#LEAH IS LITETALLY PERFECT ANNABETH FUCK OFF RACIST PEOPLE#annabeth chase
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yeah yeah i got recommended that Henry Cooldown analysis video whatever. i am still not over people comparing Henry to a medieval knight, NOT even taking the time to unpack that said mental image of a knight is 'mostly' associated with the British Monarchy*, an extension of its Empire that *checks notes* did a long list of atrocities like imperialism and colonialism, and also (multiple) genocides.
Henry is NOT British, he is Irish. Although considering the history of Ireland and how poorly the British Empire has treated them (amongst SO MANY OTHER COUNTRIES AND DIASPORAS), yeah it's NOT surprising that an Irish man like Henry is essentially forced to adopt quote on quote 'British sensibilities' to 'survive'. <- intentional imagery or not, the implications are not lost on me.
Like okay, calling out the comparison is cool but it sure would be nice if people went further to unpack what that means and implies in the long term. you know, like ACTUAL CRITICAL ANALYSIS?!
#I COULD do a whole essay about this. but i don't have the spoons to do so.#this is were i drop the big ball of information about me because fun fact! I am IRISH AND SCOTTISH. AND GREEK. so like.#so yeah i REALLY don't like the british#i hope in alternate universe i make youtube video essays about no more heroes and successfully argue how its about inter-generational traum#shallow rambles#nomoreposting#technically I was quite surprised by being recommended it. but looking at the comments i realised that their interpretation#is like the buy the books obvious surface level analysis of henry's character. not actually. thinking about the deeper things#behind his character. like. are we really going to ignore how his memories were wiped when he was adopted? okay.#to me henry is an example of someone finally confronting their trauma. how they cope is a whole other thing but henry is second#to jeane (the sister) that actually takes the time to confront the trauma although unfortunately this is mostly implied off-screen#travis BARELY acknowledges how fucked up it was for him and his siblings to be split apart and raised by different families#this got really fucking personal and i don't think anyone has actually cared enough to even consider the historical subtext#of these characters but that's just my take.#also i'm not fucking listening to a man explain to me what henry is. you know in a filmbro way. i have my own brain and interpretation and#that is all that matters to me. if you liked the guys video that's fine but honestly i am just not that interested in the essay.#you like henry for the rivalry trope. I like henry for other reasons that are open ended. we are NOT the same.#btw not EVERYTHING is about kill the past. it feels so reductive to ONLY analyse suda's work as a connected series#because it implies each one can't stand on their own merits!! that's NOT good analysis!! his work can stand on their own individually!#*about the whole knight and british monarchy thing there are other knights in other countries but unfortunately we only#think about knights in a VERY british-centric way. just thought to bring that up.#no i wont make a video essay about any of this i value my anonymity.#no i won't apologise for waking up and choosing violence today
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#yeah it would have been very convenient for his brother robert#but - oh no! - it was also convenient for his other brother who immediately set off for the treasury and then a hasty coronation#(robert had fucked off on the first crusade that's why he wasn't in the right place at the right time)#(he later ends up imprisoned by his bro in a castle where he learns welsh and writes some poems)#(say what you will about henry 1st he was at least VERY good at getting things from his older brothers)#okay it might have been an actual genuine hunting accident but i only read about dead monarchs for THE DRAMA let me have this#i always enjoy when a history book gets to this point and you find out if the author thinks it was an accident or an “accident”#the normans are french vikings and i've yet to come across one whose name is actually norman#idk if that name existed then but *I* would have named at least one son 'Norman of Normandy' just for giggles#btw every famous woman of this era is called Matilda. all of them. there's battles between competing English queens called Matilda.#i have yet to come across any explanation of why this is. i assume there's an OG Matilda who's famous maybe? possibly a saint?#(there *is* one called Edith too... but then she changes her name to Matilda) (no really) (and it's her husband's mother's name)#idk how you're supposed to write Norman Monarchy Femslash when all the women have the same name#what if i want to read about Queen Matilda's epic forbidden love for her husband's arch-enemy Queen Matilda? eh? eh? EH???#i should probably come up with a tag for my history-related nonsense i wouldn't want people to find it who seek Sensible Thoughts#history fandom#(there that'll do for a tag)
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Chapter 10 done \o/
#salad-txt#baby steps or something#hey time to bitch in the tags#a few weeks ago I was talking to a coworker (who knows I write) how I aim for 300w/day#and she was - absolutely serious btw - like that's so little#don't you usually do much more is that writer's block#and it's just so discouraging??#yes I did much more when I did nothing fucking else for 4-5 months#no lazying around playing games almost no book read#(also no gw expac in that year lol)#but I can't keep that up or I'll go insane and also can we not underestimate how hard it is to do it literally every day#perhaps it's not quite 300/day but one day 100 and one day 500 but I try to get a bit done every day and have 10k at the end of month#for months. oh a migraine an evening out or whatever. well those missing words keep piling up#i've done multiple nanos before I know that and I need a goal that's low enough I can recover a missed day or two without hating my life#and let's not go to where that also applies for everything else. but you did that once so you must be able to do that again don't be lazy#do you really believe the tone of 'well you did better once before so every other attempt is worthless' is encouraging??#nope makes me stop trying why bother if i am never gonna be good enough or if i am it will make future me more miserable
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