#the boiling pot

[sabh0]

quick thingy i don't feel like cleaning up, oopsie

[shushmal]

"Okay," Eddie says, rolling up his sleeves as he approaches the kitchen counter. "You want these veggies rough chopped or are you being a freak about them today?"

"I'll show you freak," Steve says from the stove.

"Can't out freak the freak, baby." Eddie pulls out the vegetable knife from the chopping block—flush with new knowledge and still smarting from the way Steve had caught him cutting up an onion with a butter knife once. "So, what'll it be?"

There's a long silence. So long, in fact, Eddie turns around to find Steve eyeing the vegetables with a pained look in his eye.

"Sweetheart," Eddie tries. He's holding back giggles. "If you want these to be anything other than a million different sizes and shapes, you need to kick me out of the kitchen."

Steve sighs and turns back to his burners and pans, waving a wooden spoon at him. "You can stay, but do NOT cut yourself again. You're on thin ice, Munson."

"Oh, no! Chef please don't fire me!" Eddie wails dramatically, going to town on a carrot. He waggles his brows at Steve's back. "Maybe I can do some overtime? We can really get to know each other, if you know what I mean?"

"You can't sleep your way to head chef, butt face," Steve says, not even looking at him. "Be happy with assistant."

There's a loud clatter, and Eddie almost breaks his promise to Steve about the knife and his fingers when he whips around to find Robin standing in the doorway.

"I go to college!" she screeches. "I go to college for one measly month, and you already replaced me? With your boyfriend?"

"Not a replacement!" Steve hurries to say. He completely drops his spoon, darting across the kitchen to grab Robin in a hug. She dodges him. "He's just a new hire! To cover shifts! You're overworked and you deserve vacation, sick days, paid time off!"

He swipes for her again. "Fine, I want dental and a 401k included."

"We're a small business, I can't do dental insurance." Eddie quickly puts his knife down and turns the burners off since they've started chasing each other through the kitchen.

"I want my 401k to be paid out in pie then."

"Deal!"

"Do I get a 401k?" Eddie asks. Steve finally catches Robin, pulling her into a bear hug that lifts her off her feet. "I want mine in kisses."

"Shut it, newbie," Robin hisses at him from over Steve's shoulder. "You're on a 90-day probationary, and if I see you slacking, you're outta here."

[kdmiller55]

The Bloody City and the Boiling Pot

The Bloody City and the Boiling Pot

1 In the ninth year, in the tenth month, on the tenth day of the month, the word of the Lord came to me: 2 “Son of man, write down the name of this day, this very day. The king of Babylon has laid siege to Jerusalem this very day. 3 And utter a parable to the rebellious house and say to them, Thus says the Lord God: “Set on the pot, set it on;     pour in water also; 4 put in it the pieces of…

[devilfic]

you know what. I think battinson is such an enthusiastic kisser

both his kisses with selina were kind of this dreamy, almost out-of-body experience where selina had him under her spell and he was just sort of helplessly in love with her so he could do naught but follow her lead,,, but I like imagining what it'd be like if HE initiated kissing his partner

like there's the more confident bruce, a few more years into being batman bruce, where he leans in during a lull of good conversation and he's smiling and suave and controlled but like. bruce in year 2? bruce fresh off selina and realizing he could maybe make time for a relationship? realizing how much he missed being touched? somebody call animal control cause this bat is in heat

before he leans in, he watches you like you'll disappear. his eyes are wide open!! he doesn't want to miss a thing!!! I think he's more likely to grab for your waist instead of going for your face or something.... I think he bubbles with the desire to touch you so bad and he just wants to feel you against all of him, and I think he can't help being a manhandler,,, he needs to move you just so because like he cannot let you slip from his fingers when he's aching to kiss you so bad

he doesn't make a lot of noise when he kisses but he breathes Heavy. I think once he's kind of really winded that's when he starts whimpering really low in his throat... nothing too crazy... little grunts and whines but they're so quiet. if he's kissing you and gets disturbed tho I do think he will full on groan and groan LOUD and it's both funny and super attractive because his face screws up in this petulant little scowl like. can't you see he's busy

he 100% leans fully into it which is a lot because he's a BIG man. he's going to have to push you up against something every single time because he is chasing you every time you part for air, almost mindless and eyes half-lidded as he mouths at you. he's so into it that I can guarantee it's gotten you two kicked out of a gala or two when people inevitably find him devouring you in a dark corner or a hallway you both assumed to be empty

if you wear lipstick/gloss he is not wiping that shit off either oh my goooood. don't let me think about you leaving marks all over his face and him proudly walking out into a swarm of paparazzi just. cheeky

it's really hard to just give this man a quick, chaste kiss. everything has to last at least a minute with him. it's why he literally cannot kiss you when he's busy because it'll be a minute and then five and then he's behind on work (oh no..... so sad.... anyway) because he's got you laid on the nearest surface sucking bruises into your neck

bruce will kiss any part of you but I think he's just so obsessed with your lips that it's where he inevitably fixates each time. it is so so hard to kiss him anywhere else because he will be like wow nice. kiss from my lovely partner. not on my lips tho.... and when he turns around for a kiss on the lips you can't just refuse! he's got such kissable lips and oh this is a time loop that never ends isn't it

[hyunpic]

🥟

[skullamity]

PARSNIP YOU LITTLE SHIT! THERE WERE EXACTLY 17 MINUTES IN BETWEEN WHEN I TAPED THIS SIGN UP AND WHEN HE CLIMBED OVER.

BEHOLD, MY SON, THE ONLY CAT IN THIS HOUSE WHO DOES NOT SEEM TO COMPREHEND THAT THE GATE MEANS NO CATS IN THE KITCHEN WHILE WE ARE COOKING! >:(

[mihotose]

literally always saying this

[inkskinned]

as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen

the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"

[pealingpetals]

he's just a little chilly

[orbiyoo]

ive realized its not fair to my tumblr mutuals that i never post anything on here. i crucified kim dokja

[kisekiii25]

they are turning into soup

verrrry rushed mcc scuffed blue bats fanart

[weirdmixofweirdness]

I will shout this until people actually listen!

[spectrumgarden]

Anyways food that requires no prep/ very little prep to be edible is accessibility. If you supplied me with a weeks worth of veggies I have to cut up and boil and season and fucking stir fry, and pasta and rice (...) I'm still going without food for majority of my meals. Unless you personally want to prepare 3 meals a day for me you better shut up about me relying on frozen / instant / pre cut (etc) food.

[betaphannie]

i like how we've been calling it a hard launch, as if these two haven't been flirting in front of us for almost fifteen years

[oldshowbiz]

ok

[carouselcometh]

The Glass Coffin Mocktail! In honor of my most beloved and favorite Saw trap 5ever :)