#the betrayal russo
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ruminate88 · 6 months ago
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This is so true! Also, remind yourself that an apology now is not going to change the past. Forgiveness SETS YOU FREE but also takes some weight off that person who hurt you. Don’t you know they’re already buried in enough shame??
Why do you think they hurt you so much?? They’re already hurting and they project that hurt on you. NOW you’re left feeling as bad as them. However, be willing to deal with the hurt and trauma. You are able to face it and face the shame. Don’t run from it all! Confront it. Sit uncomfortably in it all and remember healing is possible!! You won’t always feel so bad.
You can only heal yourself. You can’t heal the ones who hurt you. Hope for them, pray for them and let them go free. Don’t chase them and hang their sins over their heads. I don’t know all the answers to why they came into your life and brought you so much pain but moving forward, you have so much life and self to learn and discover. You can get more in touch with your higher self and purpose. ❤️‍🩹
You should forgive yourself, love yourself enough to do what’s right and best for you from now on. Feed and nurture your soul. Seek out truth in life. Seek out inner peace and allow yourself to be transformed into the image in which you were created. Don’t run back to the past and try to fight it or “Right the wrongs”. They’re not your’s to right!!!
Finding a greater purpose on this earth is worth more than goals or dreams. Let all your old habits and beliefs go. Embrace a brighter today! Take in a deep breath and relax your whole being. Rest into existence and let it be enough. Stop worrying about what you have to accomplish or who you want to be. Love your enemies enough to become the example they need to see. Show them how to heal shame and hurts of the past.
You have no control over those who hurt you. You can’t think or feel for them. You can only think and feel where you’re at. REST. HOPE FORWARD. PEACE WITH YOU. LOVE GUIDING YOU ❤️‍🩹 FORGIVENESS STILL!
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wileys-russo · 6 months ago
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Alessia Russo, "i want you, nobody else" at a party
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prized cow II a.russo
"what about her? or him? or her? or her? or him?" you rolled your eyes at the younger girls insistent pointing, smacking her hand down and shaking your head.
"none of them?" vic gasped in shock, two drinks too many having her squinting up at you as you couldn't help but chuckle. "no shock you're single mate, standards are too high." kyra added on with a tut as you shoved her where you were stuck sat between them.
"its not them-" "-its you!" kyra and vic chimed out in sync, sharing a look and bursting out laughing causing your cheeks to heat up bright red. "shut up! i'm not that predictable. am i?" you mumbled, necking your drink as the dutch beside you patted your leg.
"you are." both of them spoke in sync again, their loud rambunctious laughter having you wince, thankfully drowned out by the thundering bass pumping in the club you'd all met up at for katies birthday.
thing one and thing two still continuing on their mission to hook you up with a stranger, something you'd long given up begging them to stop, you caught lia's eye across the room as she glanced over, giving her a pleading look which had her lips curling in amusement.
"you two!" the girls beside you fell silent as the swiss appeared, giving them a stern look and pointing her thumb behind her, how quickly vic and kyra cleared off making you grin as lia replaced them sitting beside you.
"what is wrong hm? you have been sat here all night!" lia questioned as you snaked a mouthful of her drink before she snatched it away. "i have not! i was dancing with your girlfriend and laia just ten minutes ago. the girlfriend you haven't even told half the team about!" you teased as she gave you a look.
"stop deflecting." "i am not!"
another look.
"fine. i'm just sick of everyone trying to set me up with someone, why won't they just mind their own business and leave my love life to me?" you huffed moodily, crossing one leg over the other and exhaling.
"they're just trying to help-" "i don't need help! i'm happy, i am." you pushed with a frown, lia slinging an arm over you as you sighed and leaned into her.
"i will have a word to the girls about backing off." the older girl murmured, pinching your cheek as a small smile crept back onto your face. "thank you." you gave her a side hug, a sense of relief beginning to settle in.
"besides. i already told you, ana is single!" you leapt away from the swiss with a grimace on your face. "lia!" you huffed in betrayal as she grinned, downing the last of her drink.
"only joking." she assured patting your knee and starting to stand to head over to the bar. "you are not her type anyway!" the swiss winked, disappearing to grab another drink as you shouted after her and flipped her off.
catching kyra and vic speaking to rosa you noticed all three seemed to be trying to sneak glances over to you, and not wanting to wait around and see what they were plotting you quickly stood and made a beeline toward the bathroom.
once inside you exhaled heavily, the moment the door slammed behind you the quiet that followed much needed to help you clear your head as you started toward the sink.
before you could even take another breath the door banged open again, a blonde blur zooming through and slamming it closed after herself as bright blue eyes met yours.
"hi." "hi."
you couldn't help but smile as you noticed the slight blush on her cheeks, the same you could feel creeping up the back of your neck as she stepped closer.
"i feel like i haven't seen you all night." alessia pondered, her fingers nudging yours where your arm by your side and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel the bolts of electricity which shot up at your arm at her touch.
"i've been avoiding you." you spoke bluntly, her face falling before she noticed your grin and her eyes rolled. "hilarious." she muttered sarcastically, shoving you and smiling down at the floor as the pair of you stood side by side leant against the sink.
"has kyra been bothering you?" alessia questioned softly, and you could feel her concerned gaze pan over the side of your face but as soon as you turned to look back at her it was trained to the floor again.
"jealous?" you smiled softly, bumping your shoulder gently into hers, your fingers now brushing against hers where your hands hung side by side, pinkies slowly intertwining making butterflies flutter in your stomach.
"no!" alessia answered quickly, the two of you finally sharing a look and a grin before returning your gazes to the tiled floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the room.
"she's been trying to sell me off like a prized cow, vic too." you chuckled, the electricity bolts returning as alessia now properly took your hand in hers.
"well now i'm jealous." alessia admitted quietly though you didn't miss the way her lips curled upward. "should be, i'm worth a fair bit of money russo." you teased softly, squeezing her hand and bumping your hip into hers again.
"oh i know. who went shopping with you yesterday?" alessia challenged looking up as you scoffed. "i told you i would pay for my own stuff! but you-" you started to argue, a laugh and a pair of very familiar lips shutting you up as they pressed against yours.
"we could just tell them about us." you were again caught off guard by the words that followed, alessia's taller form caging you in against the counter you were pressed against, pulling away and speaking up.
"i thought you weren't ready yet? there's no pressure less, i know i said that stuff about kyra but-" again, cut off with pale pink lips moving against yours.
"well i've been thinking about it and we could start with just a few of our close friends, our parents have kept it hush." your girlfriend mused making you smile, her hand dropping yours as they both settled on your hips, yours winding around her neck.
"our friends mouths are much bigger than our families." you reminded with a snicker of amusement making the blonde chuckle. "well we have to start somewhere, and i think i'm ready. if you are!" alessia clarified quickly, worry flickering momentarily through her eyes as you nodded.
"i am. this is still...new, but i like it." you assured with a nod, pecking her lips twice and enjoying the way the tips of her ears reddened.
"new? babe its been two months!" alessia laughed as you rolled your eyes which flickered to the door as you thought you heard it open but it stayed closed.
"maybe, but its your first time dating a girl!" you reminded poking her nose as she rolled her eyes but nodded, unable to argue the fact that all of this had indeed been something new for the pair of you.
"well i am ready, at least for a few of the girls to know. i want you, nobody else." alessia assured as you blushed and she beamed, kissing your flushed cheeks.
"and then maybe they'll stop trying to sell you off like a prized cow." your girlfriend teased as you gasped, opening your mouth to tell her off but once more your words were swallowed by her lips locking with yours.
"you can't just kiss me to shut me up whenever you want you know?" "oh no? watch me."
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onaswife · 29 days ago
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In search of an omega
Couple: alpha! Leah Williamson x alpha! Alessia russo x omega!fem!reader
Au!Omegaverse. Alpha x Alpha x Omega
Word count: 2.9k
Warnings: Smut, English is not my first language, so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes, Bad behavior of former Chelsea teammates (nothing is real)
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Leah and Alessia, both Arsenal players and Alphas, had been together for a while; they met on the England national team. Their relationship was strong and solid. But for some time now, they both felt like something was missing. They both love each other; there's always that spark between them, both in their relationship and in sex, but they still felt like something was missing. An omega who would fit in with them, who would complete them. Although they had met many omegas recently while celebrating at bars, none seemed to be the omega they were looking for.
But everything changed when the new player arrived from the team's arch-rival, Chelsea. Y/N, a Chelsea full-back, the best full-back they could have, decided to sign with Arsenal. Fans claimed it was the biggest betrayal.
Her signing from Chelsea was a surprise. At Stamford Bridge, Reader had been one of the most dangerous players against Arsenal, a nightmare on the pitch. But seeing her arrive on presentation day wearing the red jersey of her new team made something in Leah and Alessia click.
It was her.
The perfect omega for them.
Her scent was intoxicating, her presence impossible to ignore. She had no idea how much they wanted her. And best of all… she didn't have an alpha yet.
After the welcome that was given every time a new member joined the team, Leah and Alessia were fighting over who would show Y/N around. They both took it easy, showing her all the essential places (and the non-essential ones too). They both took the opportunity to get to know her better, exchanging numbers with the excuse that she would text them in case she had questions or needed a driver, since Y/N didn't have a car yet.
From that day on, the Arsenal veterans began flirting. It wasn't obvious flirting; it was just little things, like making sure Y/N felt comfortable.
Then, the flirting began to develop, so that after practice, Alessia and Leah would offer to drive her home, making sure she was safe and comfortable.
Over the course of two months, they had already established a relationship of trust between them. Y/N was their favorite Omega. The physical contact began to increase, small touches at first, then leaving their hands lingering longer than usual on the Omega's back, or touching her shoulders or giving her massages after a more aggressive workout.
But the real hunt began with the texts.
At first, they were casual. "Hard training today, are you okay?" "See you tomorrow, want us to bring you some coffee?" But then… they began to change. They were much more flirtatious, almost like proposals.
"You looked beautiful on the court today. Hard to concentrate with an Omega like you around."
"Have you ever thought about what it would be like to have two Alphas just for you?"
"We love seeing you tremble when we look at you, omega. The question is… how much more could we make you tremble?"
Y/N couldn't handle the tension. She felt on fire every time the messages appeared on her screen. Her thoughts clouded during training when she felt Leah and Alessia's eyes on her. She couldn't deny how much she loved them, how much she desired them. She couldn't stop her thoughts from wandering at the comments the alphas made. She could imagine what it would be like to be with both of them, how their lips felt on hers, roaming her body, feeling them next to her. After those thoughts and more, she always ended up needy with a vibrator on her clitoris, moaning at the thoughts of Leah and Alessia.
One night, after a rather intense game in which everyone was exhausted enough to not want to celebrate, Leah texted her, just as she did every day, "Enough with the hints. We want you for ourselves. Let us take you on a date."
Y/N hesitated… thought about it for a few seconds. Then the answer came out faster than she thought, almost naturally.
"Yes."
The first date was perfect. Leah and Alessia took her to an intimate restaurant, where the jokes, the glances, and the heat between them became unbearable. Leah played with the rim of her glass, looking at her with that arrogant smile that made it hard for the Omega to breathe.
"You know you belong to us, right?" Alessia murmured in her ear when Leah had gotten up to go to the bathroom.
Y/N felt her skin prickling. Her omega instinct screamed at her to snuggle between them, to let herself be claimed. But her mind and she knew she shouldn't, at least not yet. Y/N had a feeling they were the alphas she wanted in her life, to mark her and bear her pups.
When Leah returned from the bathroom, she resumed her place on Y/N's other side, resting her hand on her thigh. Y/N became even more nervous; she liked the closeness they both showed her, but at that moment she felt much more sensitive. Every little touch she felt from Alessia, every touch from Leah made a tingle straight to the core.
When the three of them finished dinner amid laughter and knowing glances from the couple, the date came to an end. The three of them stood up from where they were sitting, feeling a tinge of sadness knowing the date would come to an end. The three of them walked slowly toward the exit, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. When they got to the car, they opened the door for Y/N to get in first, and then they both got in, heading for the apartment where Y/N had started staying.
After that great first date, it turned into a second. The second into a third. And soon, after almost a year of dating and an informal relationship between the three of them, Y/N was spending more time at Leah and Alessia's house than she was at her own. It started as a weekly movie night. One day a week, they would get together to watch a movie at the alphas' apartment, where Y/N ended up staying the night. Then, they would spend time at the apartment, where the three of them, after some discussion, decided to sleep there. Using the excuse of the sleepovers they sometimes had, Y/N started leaving items of clothing in the alphas' closet, so when they went out to train the next day, Y/N would inevitably be impregnated with the scent of Leah and Alessia.
Although Alessia and Leah joked about it, deep down, they both knew that Y/N already belonged to them, was their omega without the need for a brand, or well, even without the brand.
Then came that game. The big London derby. Chelsea versus Arsenal.
Back when she played for Chelsea, she used to destroy Arsenal. But now… now it was different.
Y/N didn't just play well, she played with fire. Every pass, every dribble, every shot was a declaration: She belonged to Arsenal now.
Chelsea weren't happy about losing her. It was pretty obvious from the pre-match press conference, where the current manager lamented having accepted Arsenal's offer for her, and the current players on her squad made their displeasure clear on the pitch.
It started with off-the-cuff comments, talking about how needy Y/N was with the alphas, which was why they didn't want her on the team, and resentful glances from Lauren James. The two had been quite close during Y/N's time with her former team, so James felt her departure was a betrayal of what they were building together.
Before halftime, things escalated pretty quickly. Now it wasn't verbal, now it was physical: harsh tackles, fouls, "accidental" hits, all without being booked by the referee. When she saw that, she pretended nothing had happened.
There was a particularly harsh tackle on Y/N as she ran down the touchline, looking for Lessi or Frida. After finding Frida and sending a cross in, she felt a sharp pain run from her ankle to her thigh. She fell straight to the ground, clutching her ankle, the pain nagging at her. She tried to get back to her feet, all in short, slow movements. First, she rolled onto her back, then placed a hand on the damp grass until she could sit up. As soon as she was seated, she heard a voice, one she unfortunately recognized quite well.
"Stop pretending and get up. No one believes your lies anymore." Y/N felt her chest tighten for a moment, her breath catching in her chest as her eyes widened in surprise.
"Come on, useless omega, get up." Without any tact, she grabbed her forearm, lifting her painlessly, pulling her arm with a firm grip. She was about to utter more words until she felt someone push her. By inertia, the omega fell back onto her butt onto the grass, hoping the pain in her ankle would pass soon.
Minutes later—after the medics came onto the field to check on her ankle and tell her it was fine, it had just been the blow—Y/N could finally see what all the commotion was about.
Alessia was grabbing James by the collar of her jersey, while Katie and Beth were trying to separate her and Leah. Y/N looked to her side when she felt someone grab her hand. It was Kyra and Lotte.
"They'll be fine. How are you doing? We can tell Renée to make the substitution."
Kyra was the one who spoke, while Lotte brought her hand up to the injured omega's face, hoping to see some sign that she wasn't fit to continue playing.
"Lessie has to be stopped, otherwise she'll get a red card!" Lotte and Kyra glanced at each other for a second, then turned to look at the area where the argument was going on. Neither alpha was budging. While Lauren continued to yell insults at Y/N, Alessia was trying to calm down and not punch her in the face, which wasn't working as the doctors continued to work on her Omega.
"You better stay away from her, otherwise, I won't take care of a broken nose."
"Believe me, we all want to stay away from that whore," James blurted out near Alessia's face, seeing how she was getting closer and closer to losing her temper. "How much harder are they going to try to get her into bed? Although, well, she's not very good there."
Upon hearing Lauren's words, Leah felt her anger grow even more, she felt her blood boil, but she thought more clearly and approached the referee, telling her about the comments Lauren kept making.
After what was a "fight" that lasted about 10 minutes, the referee sent Lauren off, allowing the match to continue.
When the final whistle blew, marking Arsenal's victory, the first thing she did was run straight to Leah and Alessia—who, impressively, wasn't penalized.
The two of them welcomed you with open arms, enveloping you in their scent, making sure everyone saw who you belonged to now. Leah was the one who broke the silence between the three of them.
She whispered in her ear, "You played amazing, baby. I think you deserve a reward." You blushed even more than you already had from the previous game and buried yourself deeper in your alphas' arms, enjoying the moment of closeness.
When they arrived at the locker room amidst the victory celebrations against Chelsea, Y/N was trapped between her alphas' bodies. Leah was holding her by the waist, leaning her body against the omega's back, while Alessia was hugging her from the front, resting her head in the crook of Y/N's neck.
Leah placed soft kisses on Y/N's neck and the nape of her neck, feeling her begin to melt in her hands, a sensation that Leah loved.
"Why don't we go home instead?"
"We could have our own private celebration." Alessia was the one who spoke this time against the omega's ear, leaning her body against Y/n's, making her feel her small erection against her abdomen.
If before I was in a hurry to shower quickly, now it was a necessity to finish and go home quickly.
You barely had time to process what those words meant before finding yourself in your nest—the apartment you all now shared, the place you'd previously lived almost abandoned—
Leah and Alessia couldn't wait any longer; they'd been patient, but the match had changed everything. Seeing how you fought for every ball, how you responded to your former teammates' words, and how in the second half you looked like a completely new and sexy person, it took its toll on both of them.
That night, after dinner made by Leah and snuggled up in the nest in Lessi's arms, soft, tender kisses began to land on your face and neck from the older alphas. After a kissing session that gradually escalated in intensity and clothes began to get in the way, Leah took the omega in her arms, wrapping her legs around her waist, so she could simultaneously grind her member against her crotch.
Y/N was purring and moaning with need. She needed to feel her alphas, she wanted to feel the release they'd been avoiding since they left the stadium.
As soon as they got to the bedroom, Leah sat with Y/N ​​on her lap while caressing her omega's waist and butt. "You don't know how much I need you, baby, how much I want you," the alpha began to whisper against her ear while the omega moved her hips over her cock. She pulled the shirt the girl was wearing over her head, throwing it on the bedroom floor.
She brought her face to my chest, beginning to lick and lightly bite my nipples. I felt myself getting wetter and wetter watching her and feeling her on my body. The only thing on my mind was feeling them even more.
When I heard Lessi's footsteps enter the room, Leah and I were already naked, her cock buried inside me. I couldn't stand it anymore. Leah had stopped her movements every time she felt I was close to my orgasm, but every time I began to move away from her body, she gripped my hips more firmly and wouldn't let me move. I felt Lessi's presence before her hands behind my back. She was already naked, and she began kissing my neck and then leaving small bites.
"You look so pretty riding Leah's cock, so pretty and so ours." She left a slightly harder bite, making me moan. "Who should be putting a nice mark here?" She ran her tongue over the spot where the couple's mark should have been. "Lessi… Please." It was on automatic, without me realizing I had left the space free for her to mark me.
I heard Leah giggle beneath me. “She’s a desperate little omega, desperate for our cocks and a mark.” She grabbed my thighs and left a squeeze there, indicating that she would start rocking me on her cock again. “What more do you want? To be tied up while Lessi marks you?” The only thing that came out of my lips was a lewd moan as I moved faster on Leah’s cock, trying to reach my orgasm. I needed the release otherwise I would come crazy.
The overstimulation I was feeling was overwhelming. Alessia's hands roaming my body, feeling her begin to press against my ass, Leah's mouth on my breasts, and her cock buried inside me. It was getting closer and closer. I could feel that familiar tug in my belly.
"Please, Leah, please, I need to do this." My voice sounded needier than ever, desperate gasps leaving my chest. I couldn't recognize myself being so submissive and needy; it wasn't like me, but feeling the level of pleasure I was reaching was something new.
"You're ours now," Leah murmured. "Forever," Alessia added.
As soon as I heard those words, followed by that stinging sensation on my neck and something hot running down my lower back and ass, I felt myself come down from that cloud of pleasure at an accelerated pace. The orgasm that swept through me was an avalanche of heightened senses. I continued to feel Leah's thrusts, then a deeper, stronger thrust until Leah stilled, panting against my neck. That's when I felt it.
Alessia had marked me, and Leah had knotted me.
I'd never felt more whole. More loved. More hers.
Chelsea might have been furious. I might have lost friends. But in this moment, between Leah and Alessia's arms, lying in my nest, nothing mattered.
Because now I had a new home. And two alphas who would never let me go.
Here is what was promised, I hope you like it and sorry if there are mistakes.
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gpcwsl · 21 days ago
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Fic with alessia and reader has accident at work resulting in amnesia? Angsty but happy ending please?
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Alessia Russo x Rival/Friend!Reader
Who are you?
WC: 1.9+
MasterList
Warnings: Injury & Unconsciousness, Memory Loss/Amnesia, Medical Trauma, Emotional Distress, Implied Concussion, Sports-Related Violence.
Song: Right where you left me - Taylor Swift
The North London Derby was never just another game—it was war. A battle where sweat and pride clashed under the floodlights, where tackles bit harder, and where history and rivalry tangled in every pass, every sprint, every breath.
You knew this better than anyone. Once draped in Arsenal red, now wearing the navy of their fiercest rivals, you could feel the weight of the past pressing against you. The Emirates Stadium was a familiar battlefield, but this time, you stood on enemy ground. The jeers from the crowd rang in your ears, a chorus of betrayal from fans who once cheered your name. But you didn’t care. Not today. Not in a game like this.
From the first whistle, the match was brutal. Every tackle had a little more bite, every duel was fought with teeth bared. The game was physical, scrappy, intense—just as a North London Derby should be.
Fifteen minutes in, disaster struck for Spurs. A miscommunication at the back, a deflection off your shin, and the ball rolled helplessly past your own goalkeeper. Own goal. Arsenal 1, Tottenham 0.
It was like a punch to the gut. You could feel the shift immediately—Tottenham lost their rhythm, their edge. Passes misplaced, tackles mistimed. Arsenal sensed blood in the water and pounced, adding a second before halftime.
The dressing room at the break was tense. Frustration filled the air like a storm cloud. But you still had forty-five minutes. Forty-five minutes to turn it around.
Except Arsenal had other plans.
58 minutes. 4-0.
Tottenham were drowning, and Arsenal weren’t throwing a lifeline. They were pushing your heads under, suffocating you with every pass, every run, every goal. And now, another corner for Arsenal.
You knew what was coming. Alessia Russo—Arsenal’s talisman, their golden striker—was already moving into position. You marked her tightly, feeling the heat of the battle in every muscle, every breath. The ball came flying in, curling towards the penalty spot. Instinct took over. You both leapt.
Then—crack.
A collision of bone against bone, like thunder cracking through the sky.
For a moment, there was nothing. No sound, no feeling. Just black.
Then, pain. A deep, dull ache blooming in your skull. Except—except you couldn’t move. Couldn’t open your eyes. Couldn’t do anything at all.
The world around you kept moving. Play continued. Spurs cleared the ball, launching into an attack. The crowd roared, oblivious. But not her.
Alessia.
She stayed on her feet, palm pressed to her head, the sharp sting of impact still lingering. But something felt… wrong. Instinct tugged at her, pulling her gaze back toward you. And then—her stomach dropped.
Your body, motionless on the grass.
A dead weight.
A silence in the chaos.
Panic seized her chest. “Hey!” Her voice cut through the noise, urgent, desperate. She waved frantically, trying to get the referee’s attention. “Stop the game! She’s down—she’s not moving!”
No response.
“STOP THE GAME!”
She didn’t wait. She ran, dropping to her knees beside you. “Y/n?” No answer. “Hey, come on, open your eyes—someone help her!” Her hands hovered over you, unsure whether to shake you, to hold you, to do something—anything.
Finally, medics sprinted onto the pitch. Alessia barely moved, barely breathed as they checked for a pulse. The longest few seconds of her life.
Then, relief. A pulse. You were breathing. Just knocked out.
She exhaled, but her hands were still shaking. She’d seen injuries before—this was football, after all. But this was different. You were different.
And suddenly, football didn’t matter anymore. The score, the rivalry, the badge on your shirt—it all faded into nothing. Because right now, all Alessia Russo cared about was whether or not you were going to wake up.
The game continued, but Alessia didn’t.
Not really.
She was still on the pitch, still in the red of Arsenal, but her mind was elsewhere—stuck in the moment she saw you on the ground, stuck on the feeling of dread in her stomach. Every time she blinked, she saw you limp, still, unresponsive. The world carried on around her, but all she could hear was the sound of her own heartbeat, pounding like a war drum against her ribs.
She barely noticed Rénne Slegers calling her name from the touchline. It was only when the substitution board went up that reality kicked back in.
She was being taken off.
For a second, she wanted to fight it. She never wanted to be subbed off, not in a game like this. But one look at her manager’s face, and she knew there was no point arguing. Rénne had seen what Alessia already knew—she wasn’t in this game anymore.
The moment her feet hit the sideline, she didn’t waste a second.
She ran.
Through the tunnel, down the winding halls of the stadium, her boots clattering against the floor. Her lungs burned, her legs ached, but none of it mattered. Not when you were in there, somewhere, waiting for her.
When she finally reached the medical room, she stopped dead in the doorway.
You were awake.
Relief crashed over her like a tidal wave, her breath hitching in her throat. But that relief was short-lived.
The atmosphere in the room was heavy, suffocating. The medics stood around you with tight mouths and cautious eyes. Alessia knew that look. Something was wrong.
Then, one of them turned to her.
“She doesn’t remember what happened,” they said carefully. Then, more hesitantly— “She doesn’t remember anything.”
Alessia froze.
Her stomach twisted, a sickening, sinking feeling creeping into her bones. Slowly, her eyes drifted to you.
You were staring at her. Brows furrowed, face scrunched in confusion, studying her like a puzzle piece that didn’t quite fit.
You didn’t know her.
Alessia felt the air leave her lungs.
You didn’t know her.
Not the years spent side by side at Arsenal. Not the countless hours on the training pitch, the endless late-night talks, the stupid inside jokes no one else understood. Not the moments where you felt like home to her, where she felt like home to you.
Not her.
She took a slow, unsteady step forward, her voice barely above a whisper.
“Y/n?”
Nothing. No recognition, no flicker of familiarity. Just silence.
Alessia swallowed hard, forcing herself to smile, even as her heart cracked wide open.
“It’s me,” she said, voice trembling. “It’s Less.”
“Who are you?”
Three words.
Three tiny, simple words.
Yet they slammed into Alessia with the force of a freight train, stealing the breath from her lungs.
Her throat tightened, a sharp sting burning behind her eyes. She barely registered the medic team pulling her back, barely felt their hands guiding her away as they turned their full attention to you, running tests, asking questions.
But Alessia wasn’t listening.
She was stuck in a loop, replaying those three words over and over in her head.
“Who are you?”
How was she supposed to answer that?
She was your ex teammate. Now your rival. Your friend.
She was the one who used to wake up at the crack of dawn just to drive you to training when your car broke down. The one who sat beside you in the Arsenal dressing room, who celebrated goals with you like they were the only things that mattered. The one who held you after losses, after injuries, after bad days when the world felt like too much.
She was—God, she didn’t even know what she was to you anymore.
Because right now? Right now, she was a stranger.
Alessia didn’t realize she was shaking until a medic touched her shoulder, snapping her out of her daze.
“We need you to wait outside.”
“No, but—” She tried to step forward, tried to see you, to make you remember, but the medic was firm.
“Please. Just give us a moment.”
Alessia hesitated, looking at you one last time, hoping—praying—for a flicker of recognition.
But there was nothing. Just that same confused expression.
And so, with a heavy heart, she stepped back, letting the door shut between you.
A few minutes passed, but they felt like hours.
Alessia sat just outside the medical room, elbows resting on her knees, head in her hands. The noise of the stadium felt distant, like she was underwater, drowning in the weight of everything that had just happened.
Then—roar.
The crowd erupted. The game was over.
She didn’t care.
Arsenal had probably won by an even bigger margin, but what did it matter? None of it mattered. Not when you were in that room, staring at her like she was just another face in the crowd.
Then came footsteps.
Heavy, hurried, a mix of voices growing closer. She looked up to see a group of players rounding the corner—some in red, some in navy. Arsenal and Spurs. Rivals on the pitch, but right now, just teammates. Just friends.
Lotte Wubben-Moy. Beth Mead. Caitlin Foord.
A couple of Spurs players too—players you were close to. Ashley Neville, Eveliina Summanen. Maybe more, but Alessia barely registered them.
“Less?” Beth’s voice was soft, careful. “What’s going on? Is she—”
Alessia shook her head, rubbing a hand over her face, trying to find the words. But how was she supposed to explain this? How was she supposed to tell them?
She swallowed hard. “She doesn’t remember anything.”
Silence.
Then—sharp inhales, quiet curses, worried glances exchanged between them all.
Beth looked like she wanted to cry. Lotte clenched her jaw, brows furrowed in concern. The Spurs players exchanged worried glances, Eveliina whispering something to Ash, who just shook her head in disbelief.
“No,” Caitlin murmured. “No way.”
“I—I tried,” Alessia said, voice cracking. “I spoke to her, and she just—she looked at me like I was a stranger.” She exhaled sharply, shaking her head. “She doesn’t know who I am.”
Beth reached out, squeezing her shoulder. “We’ll figure this out.”
But Alessia wasn’t sure how. Or if.
They then went into the room. Waiting for anything. Sitting down, pacing.
Alessia had barely moved since she sat down.
She couldn’t.
Not when every time she closed her eyes, she saw you—blank, confused, looking at her like she was no one.
Caitlin, Katie, and Haley sat nearby, all equally restless. The room was silent except for the occasional rustle of movement, the quiet tapping of Katie’s foot against the floor. None of them had spoken much, but they all knew why they were here.
Waiting.
Hoping.
Then—a shift.
A small sound from the bed. A stir of movement.
Alessia’s head snapped up just in time to see your eyes flutter open, blinking against the hospital lighting. Her heart pounded, breath caught in her throat as you slowly turned your head.
And then—
“Less?”
Alessia swore the world stopped turning.
For a second, she didn’t move. Couldn’t. She just stared at you, wide-eyed, not sure if she’d imagined it, if her mind was playing cruel tricks on her.
But then you frowned slightly, eyes still groggy but locked onto hers, like some part of you still knew.
That was all it took.
A shaky exhale left Alessia’s lips, and suddenly she was on her feet, stepping forward like she needed to be closer, like she needed to make sure this was real.
“You—you remember me?” Her voice barely made it past a whisper, scared to break whatever fragile moment this was.
You blinked again, confusion still evident, but you nodded. “Yeah… why wouldn’t I?”
Caitlin, Katie, and Haley all exchanged quick glances, but Alessia didn’t look away from you.
Because for the first time in what felt like an eternity, you knew her.
And that was enough.
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suckerforblondeathletes · 4 months ago
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I still don't forgive you..- Alessia Russo
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Alessia Russo x Fem!Reader
Summary: Your fear for animals in a zoo makes Alessia laugh, upsetting you. You plan on making her pay but it seems that didn't go to plan...
Warnings: SMUT, Kissing, oral (alessia receiving), fingering (Alessia receiving) cussing, uhhh I think that's it.
Authors note: Hey guys! So I found this draft and decided to post it!
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"Absolutely not." You said, sitting on the couch in the middle of the England training facility along with your girlfriend Alessia, Ella, Mary, and Leah.
"Come on babe it will be fun!" Alessia whines and grabs your hand, giving you begging eyes as you shake your head.
"No, I am not going to the zoo. I don't like animals, let alone ones in Australia."
Alessia and Mary were trying to convince you to go to a zoo in Australia, but you never have liked animals. You thought any animals other than a dog or cat were terrifying.
That all started when your brother used to pick you up and try to feed you to the giraffes in the zoo when you were little, and he would tell you stories of lions jumping out of their cages and eating little girls who played soccer.
"Please babe I will do anything. I want you to go with us." Alessia begs and you meet her eyes. Anything?
You hum and think about it for a moment, thinking about all the things you could make her do. Buy you food, new clothes, make her clean the bathroom and your cats litter box for a week. The ideas were limitless.
"Sure, but I will have to think about what I want you to do." Immediately after you said that Mary and Ella made gagging noises.
"Eww guys do that somewhere else, my eyes are innocent and childlike." Mary says making Alessia blush. You roll your eyes and flip Mary off.
"Not like that you creep." You stand up to go get some water and kiss Alessia on the lips before leaving, leaving her blushing and your teammates teasing her.
-
Here you are, holding Alessia's hand for dear life as you walk into the zoo with the England team.
"Alessia I don't like this." You say in her ear as you pass a turtle cage.
She soothes your hand before kissing your temple.
"Its okay." You hear her say, but she stops talking and you hear snickering next to you.
You whip your head to the blonde who is trying to stifle her laughs with her hand. Your jaw drops and you stare at her in betrayal.
"Alessia Russo what's so funny?" You stop walking and look at her. Ella makes oooing noises behind the two of you like a kid in school would if someone got yelled at.
“Nothing! Nothing is funny I just..” Alessia gets interrupted by Ella.
“She was making fun of you, you should definitely get her back.” Ella says tapping Alessia’s shoulder.
You think for a moment, you should get her back and make her pay.
“I won’t kiss you for a whole day. Until tomorrow at 2pm.” You look down at your phone, the time is 2:12pm, a whole day would be tomorrow at 2:12pm.
Alessia’s jaw drops as Ella laughs out loud. You give her a smirk before walking away, but turning back when you see a cheetah in an enclosure.
“No you didn’t. You’re a liar babe.” Alessia says in disbelief and tugs on your arm. You turn to her and shake your head.
“Nope, payment is payment. Maybe you shouldn’t have laughed at me.” You look at her, her jaw still open and her blue eyes scanning your face for a lie.
“Babeeeeee” She whines and leans in to kiss you, you ducking you head and dodging the kiss. This would be a wild day.
-
You all get back to the hotel and you and Alessia go to y’all’s room, when you get in the room she doesn’t say anything but stares at you like she is waiting for something.
You notice this and turn to her, “do you need something?” You ask innocently. She gives you begging eyes and walks up to you.
“Love please let me kiss you I hate this.” She begs and grabs your waist making your knees buckle slightly, but you stand strong and true to your word.
“You shouldn’t have laughed at me Russo.” You say and softly slap her chest. She drops her jaw in shock again at your response.
“I’m sorry it wasn’t funny please I won’t do it again.” She whines and grabs your waist tighter.
“Hmmm after the team dinner, maybee” you drag out the E at the end and stroke her cheek before backing out of her hold and into the bathroom to get ready.
She smiles and thinks of a way to make you want to kiss her. She remembers the dress she brought and it goes perfect for the nice place the team is going too.
You throw on a nice V neck suit jacket with nothing underneath, and matching black suit pants to go with it. Some shoes and your hair is down along with little mascara.
You walk out of the bathroom and see the blonde in a tight, mid thigh black dress. Your favorite dress, along with some black heels.
You still are taller than the blonde but by little now with the heels. You smirk and walk up to her and grab her hips, pulling her into you.
“Do you like it?” She asks and smirks at you.
You smile back and lean into her neck to lay kisses along the side of it. Resulting in a whimper of pleasure from Alessia.
“This isn’t fair” she whines but you continue kissing her neck. Your hands running down to her ass and up her back.
Pulling away you look at the lustful expression on her face and smile.
“We don’t want to be late.” You leave her and grab your purse, leaving the room.
She is standing in the same spot with her jaw dropped once again at the fact you left her turned on like that.
She scoffs and leaves the room with out her wallet, knowing she is making you pay.
-
Sitting down, a sexually frustrated Alessia to your left and a blabbering Leah to your right, the night was perfect.
You see her squirm from the corner of your eye and you put your hand on her thigh.
She huffs and tries to move your hand higher, causing you to give her a warning glance before she huffs again and continues talking with Ella across the table.
Looking over to her to make conversation, you see her big blue eyes filled with need, her face flushed and she bites her cheek to keep quiet. That made all the restraint you had left leave and you pull her up from her seat.
"Wait- where are yall going?" Ella asks mid bite, a knowing smirk on Leahs face.
"I need help with something, won't take long." Finishing the sentence while looking at the blonde who pulls you to the bathroom needly.
"Don't have too much fun!" Yells Leah as she snickers with Mary next to her.
You ignore her and rush the woman to the bathroom, her not following too far behind.
Opening the family restroom and pulling her into it, closing the door you smash your lips onto hers, causing her to moan softly and press her back to the door.
Her hands fly to your hair and neck, pulling you closer. Your hands go to her waist and hips as your lips attack hers.
Moving lower, you kiss and lick her neck, causing her to moan and press your head closer to her.
Your hand slams to her mouth and her head throws back, her eyes flutter as her back arches into you. This is the neediest you have ever seen her, you pull her small dress up and pull her underwear down quick.
Moving down to your knees, you don't tease at all and immediately go to town on her clit, a loud moan is muffled by her hand, her other one going to your hair to pull you closer.
She grinds on your face as she moans into her hand, small tears slip from her eyes as she practically suffocates you by how hard she is pressing your face into her core.
Your middle finger slips into her wet pussy and she moans and grips your hair hard, grinding and moaning like a bitch in heat.
Your finger pumps in and out of her, knowing if you added another she wouldn't be quiet. You lap at her cunt as her hand moves slightly to speak.
"I-i'm close god i'm so fucking close.. keep fucking me like that.. yes yes yes please.." She slaps her hand over her mouth as she comes hard, grinding on your face as her hips stutter, legs shaking.
Her cum drips onto your fingers and down to your palm, you don't stop until she finally rides it out and you stand, shoving your fingers into her mouth.
"I still don't forgive you for laughing at me."
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leahsgf · 1 year ago
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Can you write Alessia Russo x reader where reader has known her and Ella toone for years and is always watching their matches no matter what but reader and Alessia fall in love behind Ella’s back and then get found out?!
CAUGHT OUT - alessia russo
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since before you could even remember, it had always been you and ella, the pair of you being practically attached at the hip from when you were babies, all the way up into adulthood. your bond only grew with time, and when she introduced you to alessia as young teenagers, the three of you very quickly became an absolutely inseparable trio - falling into eachother’s stride with ease.
you weren’t entirely sure where you ended and they begun.
even as you all got older and couldn’t physically see each other as much as you used to - with them both at the peaks of their careers, and the travel and demands that came alongside that, and you caught up in your own career - you still remained a solid unit. your family.
you didn’t play football, you never had, having always been the scrawny little kid who was terrified of pe lessons, earning yourself the lifelong nickname ‘tiny’, which still stuck even as a fully grown adult. but you were there for every single one of your girls’ moments. rain or shine, no matter what side of the world, or how busy you were with work, you’d be in the stands, cheering them on.
today was no different - finding yourself sat at wembley, a stadium you’d come to learn inside and out, to watch them play. you always adored being at games, seeing your girls flourish always made you want to burst with pride. and likewise, they loved having you there, always playing their best when you were in the crowd- branding you their ‘good luck charm’, and constantly bickering over whose jersey you’d wear to the matches.
-
being such a tight knit group, and having such a set routine when it came to games - alessia’s transfer to arsenal changed things for the three of you. many things, in fact.
for almost the entirety of the time you’d known them, they’d played for the same teams - the only exception prior to this being alessia’s college days. for you, it came as an adjustment, a new team to learn about so you’d be able to fully understand and appreciate her future stories, different games to go to, and the realisation that your two favourite people were going to play against eachother at some point. at multiple points.
this also meant that most of the time when you were going to one of their games, you wouldn’t see the other. this didn’t make a difference when it came to the times you would go to watch ella play, but with alessia, it changed things. it blurred lines that the pair of you had previously forced yourselves to draw, using ella as an almost reason, signifying the fact you were best friends, and that’s all it was.
in fact, you actually had no idea at what point exactly you and alessia became more than friends. from the secret stolen kisses at sleepovers as teenagers for ‘practice’ to the lingering glances and touches that lasted just a second longer than friendly ones should, you weren’t even sure that you had ever truly been just that.
however, with the sudden absence of the pair of your’s best friend, and the physical representation of the walls put between you, said wall came crashing down - within alessia’s first week at her new club.
your relationship very quickly blossomed from that moment, a decades worth of hidden, suppressed feelings from both sides pouring out.
despite how obviously in love with each other you were, you had been terrified to reveal it to the world, specifically your world, not wanting to lose, or even slightly affect your friendship with her.
the arsenal girls had figured it out instantly the first time they met you, and had been sworn to secrecy by a very flustered and panicked alessia, which made matters even worse, and made what you were doing feel like even more of a betrayal to your best friend.
the months of sneaking around and not being able to tell ella about a relationship you were in for the first time in your life was killing you, and the more time that passed made it more awkward to come out and say to her.
there had been many close calls that didn’t help your stressing over her reaction, from the one time you had to climb out of alessia’s bedroom window when ella unexpectedly showed up demanding a girls night after training, and then had to wait twenty minutes outside before going around to the front door to pretend you’d just arrived, to the time you’d had to practically leap apart mid drunken make out when you had hosted a group of your friends at your apartment and one of them stumbled into the kitchen without warning, and thankfully (for you, not for her) it was only leah.
-
your cheeks flushed furiously as alessia spun you around, her and ella both immediately finding you after the final whistle had blown, and the lionesses solidified their well earned win.
“see tooney our little good luck charm always comes in handy!” the blonde patted your head after releasing you from her grasp - giggling when ella immediately latched onto you in response, ordering you to ‘pick her up’ after you’d already caught her in your arms.
“my girls! this calls for celebrations, come on, we’re going out!” she yelled, almost ear piercingly loud - quite literally for you, as you foolishly held her right next to your ear.
there was a group of the younger players who always went out to party after wins, and you naturally went along every time - having known most of them for the same time you’d known your best friends, practically being an extra limb to either one of them.
you hung around the locker rooms waiting for them to change and shower, rolling your eyes at the winks and nudges of beth and leah as they passed you, and shoving them away - catching a glimpse of alessia and ella closely behind them, particularly focusing on the former’s panicked expression.
-
the journey back to the team’s hotel was one that could only be described as loud and chaotic. you were sat on your girlfriend’s lap, squished between her and the seat in-front of you, and ella was sat next to you, so close that it was practically a pile up.
thankfully, she was too busy bellowing an interesting rendition of ‘islands in the stream’ to notice the blonde’s hand on your hip, pulling you flush into her and drawing little hearts and stars onto the exposed skin from where your shirt had risen up.
you and your best friends had always been touchy, so you on one of their laps was a regular occurrence, therefore there was no way in your mind that ella could find out.
-
you were back and being ushered into their room to get ready for the night ahead before you knew it - desperately attempting not to blush furiously as alessia helped you top up your makeup, following ella’s strict orders so you could all match.
“right i need to find mary she said she’d curl my hair! less, remember what i said! i know how clumsy you are just follow what i told you, yeah? mary! mary!” she didn’t even give herself a chance to finish her own sentence before she was darting out of the room, voice echoing the corridor and most likely gaining a future noise complaint in the process.
not even a second after she was out of sight, alessia turned to you with a grin that only you could read - pulling you into her.
“oh i’ve been desperate to get you alone all week, i’ve missed you baby.” she grinned, throwing her arms around you and peppering kisses all over your face before finally meeting your lips.
you melted into her touch, instantly being returned home just by the slightest trace of her fingertips in your hair, and laughing as she playfully pushed you down onto the bed.
you barely had time to register her the feeling of her lips, and the comforting weight of her on top of you before the sound of a door being flung open and a following gasp hit your ears.
alessia practically flew off of you as you threw your head back onto the pillow and scrunched your eyes closed. you knew exactly who it was without even needing to look.
“el we can expl-”
“MARY YOU OWE ME SO MUCH MONEY!”
and she was gone just as fast as she stumbled in, cackling as mary groaned from the next room.
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petertingle-yipyip · 3 months ago
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MAD AT GOD SAGA - FULL MASTERLIST
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Mad At God - Daredevil Canon: Romantic Matt/DD X Livia/Exodus
World Class Sinner - Punisher Canon: Platonic Frank x Livia , Situationship Billy Russo x Livia
MAG
Season 1 : Livia and Matt were friends since college, though they both have a secret from one another. When the sunsets and the Devil roams Hell’s Kitchen, there’s one person who seems to get in the way, Exodus.
Season 2 : With the Fisk situation behind her, Exodus tries to move forward without Daredevil. But as fate would have it, that shift changes Y/N’s relationship with Matt. The two start to wonder if maybe those lives are more interconnected than they first believed.
Season 2b (Defenders) : Time heals all wounds, until they’re reopened. Livia and Matt try to leave Exodus and the Devil behind, but when an old face returns with a new vendetta, those personas are revived. Guilt, revenge, blood, death. All prices that the Kitchen’s vigilante duo has to pay, and fate is a cruel mistress who comes to collect.
Season 3 : Round and round she goes. Just when she feels her life is on track and her emotions can occur without her own interference, her old enemy of Wilson Fisk begins to play games. Forced to choose between new friends and old, play the part or stand alone, life or death, things become as dangerous as they’ve ever been.
WCS
Season 1: With daredevil dead, exodus returns from Quantico unsure of who she should be. fighting nightmares and deja vu, small sparks threaten to revive something saved for matt murdock before a shocking betrayal rattles New York’s two most dangerous vigilantes.
Season 2 : Livia finds herself caught amidst another two sided war. With the reemergence of Billy Russo and a new brutal threat, she takes up her vigilante mantel yet again.
BONUS CONTENT
Doomsday - It was never her fight, but she went. She left Hell’s Kitchen and with the snap of some fingers, Livia Yersova was gone.
Meet June Yersova
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hungermakesmonsters · 6 months ago
Text
Love, Sick Love
Chapter Six
Plot summary : Working at one of the shadier bars in Brooklyn, you have one rule; don’t mess around with the patrons. Most of them are criminals, dangerous. None more so than Billy Russo, but Billy believes that rules are made to be broken. Especially your rule. One lapse in judgement is all it takes for Billy to decide that you’re his, and he’s never been the sort of man to take rejection well.
Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader
Story Rating : R 
Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Guns, crime, Frank Castle, and panic attacks. All chapters will deal with dark and smutty themes, including but not limited to stalking. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 
Word Count : 4.9k
A/N : If you've see S.2 of The Punisher, some of this might seem familiar.
CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO | CHAPTER THREE | CHAPTER FOUR | CHAPTER FIVE
Master List
Chapter Six
It was always the same dream; painted horses, blood, broken glass, screams. Flickering light, muzzle flash, and that white skull.
Night after night it haunted him, terrorised him. 
He’d wake up a cold sweat, his heat racing over the half-remembered terror that he couldn’t even say for certain was real.
Once he was awake, there was no getting back to sleep. He sat up on the cold warehouse floor, surrounded by his crew, his brothers. They’d all agreed to sleep in the warehouse before the job they were about to pull for the sake of operational security. But not every man had stayed where he was supposed to.
Jake was gone. Vanished without a trace.
As Billy searched the warehouse for him, he felt an unbridled sense of anger filling him at the betrayal, and that anger quickly spiralled out into other angry thoughts.
Like last night.
He’d watched you on your date, watched you do everything you could to get over him and move past him. But Billy hadn’t let you. He’d seen the way you’d thrown yourself at Marc once you had him in your bedroom, and then he’d revelled in your disappointment the moment you realised that your condoms were gone.
Today, he knew you’d probably go to your building manager and ask for the locks on your apartment door to be changed. You’d never think of checking the window latch, you’d never notice how he’d rigged it so it didn’t fully lock anymore.
You’d never be able to keep him out. He wouldn’t let you.
You were his, whether you liked it or not, and Billy wasn’t going to give up on you.
He’d already spent so much time in your apartment, all those days you’d spent working the day shift, he’d spent showing himself around, learning everything he could about you. And, when he’d learned all there was to learn, he’d spent hours simply laying on your bed, remembering what it felt like to sleep beside you.
And, when he wasn’t in your apartment, he spent his days following you.
He’d followed you into the city that day, and you’d almost caught him on the subway.  It made it more fun for him, made him feel like a Marine again. He picked hiding places like he would a sniper's nest, turning you into a mark, a target. His recon taught him so much about you; where you liked to shop, your favourite coffee shop, and how you liked to lose yourself in the city crowds with nothing but your headphones for company.
He’d grinned as you approached someone wearing a similar jacket to his, as if you could somehow sense that he was following you and you were trying to find him. And, just like that, he unwittingly pulled you into a game of cat and mouse.
His nights were spent on the roof of the building opposite yours, observing you through a scope then, when he was sure you were sleeping, he’d climb up the fire escape by your bedroom window to watch you sleep, sometimes spending the whole night there.
Billy came to learn very quickly that you were more than happy to walk around your apartment wearing little to nothing, and on more than one occasion, he’d found his hand in his pants, fingers wrapped around his cock.
“Where the fuck is Jake?” One of the guys asked, loud enough to rouse everyone and pull Billy from thoughts of you.
Billy shrugged. “We’ll deal with him later. Get everyone up, we’ve got a job to do.
They had a plan, they’d spent weeks running drills and rehearsing, making sure everything went smoothly. It had given Billy purpose, and being with the guys had given him a sense of belonging and brotherhood that he’d been sorely missing.
And, once the plan was set in motion, Billy was able to focus, silencing everything else in his mind.
They got into the cars, each armed and with a mask. Billy looked down at his mask, remembering the day he’d decorated it, putting all of his pain and uncertainty into the design. Sometimes the mask felt more like a face than his own did and, when he was alone, he’d find himself hiding beneath it. But, today, it served a different purpose; to strike fear into those around him.
They entered the check exchange and things became a blur. The plan went off without a hitch and, in less than five minutes they had the money and were on their way out without even having to fire a shot. 
Billy felt good, he felt a rush of adrenaline like he hadn't felt in - fuck, he couldn’t remember how long.
“Hey, isn’t that Jake?” Someone shouted, waving at a figure coming down the street in Jake's clothes and the mask he'd gotten for the heist. “Hey, asshole, you’re late!”
“He’s not gettin’ a cut now,” someone else said.
Billy turned, expecting to see his friend, but immediately realised that there was something wrong...
At first it was the voice, a rough growl from beneath a devil mask - the mask that Jake should have been wearing. It wasn’t Jake’s voice but it sparked an uncomfortable recognition in Billy, enough to make him freeze.
“Russo!” It called out.
He turned, his heart pounding in his chest.
(It couldn’t be true. It just couldn’t.)
He knew that he should leave, that they needed to get out of there before the cops showed up. But he couldn’t move.
The figure slowly pulled off the mask, confirming all of Billy’s worst fears. 
Frank.
Why was Frank there?
Pain and panic lanced through his chest, lungs burning as they refused to draw breath, and the world tilted on its axis as Frank opened his jacket and revealed the white skull daubed red with blood. His legs weakened and he almost dropped to his knees. His head shook, hoping he could wake himself from this new nightmare. But there was no escape.
Then there was a gun in Frank’s hand, an anger on his face that Billy had only ever witnessed a couple of times before, when they’d been pinned down by the enemy as Marines. Now, he was looking at Billy that way, glaring, wishing him dead before even lifting the gun.
Billy tried to force a breath, he felt claustrophobic, stifled by his mask. His mind continued to race, knowing that this was another piece of the jigsaw but not knowing where it fit into the picture. 
They were friends. They were brothers.
At least, in Billy’s mind they were.
But Frank had the skull painted across his chest, and the sight of it left Billy feeling inexplicably terrified and sick to his stomach.
All around him were shouts, his crew telling him that they needed to leave, but when their cries reached his ears they seemed like little more than distant mutterings.
Someone shot and, finally, Frank moved, lifting his gun and firing back. But Billy didn’t race for cover, didn’t move to lift his own weapon. All he could do was stand and watch, his feet firmly rooted in place by the panic and confusion that had forced the breath from his chest.
Without thought or care, he pulled off his mask, shaking his head again, trying to make sense of the jumbled mess of thoughts and emotions that were tearing through him. The shots around him were barely noticeable over the ringing in his ears and the echo of his own racing heartbeat. 
(Why was Frank shooting at him?)
People were dying around him and it hardly registered. He just remained there, in the middle of the street. 
“Did you do this to me, Frank?” 
He heard the voice, loud and angry, broken and agonised. It took him a moment to realise that the shout had come from him. Although he didn’t want to admit it, it was the only thing that made any sense.
His head hurt. His face hurt.
Everything about the moment hurt.
Billy lifted his gun and repeated the question. “I said; did you do this to me, Frank?”
He pulled the trigger, even though his aim was wide - he wasn’t trying to hit Frank, just get an answer from him.
“You’re goddamned right I did,” came the answer over the din around them.
The words felt like a knife through his chest, slicing into his heart. He pulled the trigger, again and again, each shot getting closer and closer to Frank, a terrible gut wrenching scream leaving his lips. The gun clicked, the clip empty as he continued to pull the trigger.
Suddenly, there were arms around him; two guys pulling him into the car.
As they left the scene, Billy dropped his head into his hands, losing track of what was happening around him.
Somehow, on the drive back to the warehouse, amidst the yelling and the blaming, Billy managed to mostly pull himself together. When they got out of the cars, they divided the money up between them, and he sent two of the guys to look for Jake to find out what the fuck happened. Part of him knew that he should deal with the rat himself, but Billy had somewhere else he needed to be, someone else he needed to see.
You.
He needed you. He needed to see you, be near you. He wanted to hold you and lose himself in you.
----------
To say you were livid was something of an understatement. 
You were angry and scared. And you were exhausted. Fighting him all the time, looking over your shoulder and wondering if he was there, was so fucking exhausting.
First thing in the morning you’d been to see the building manager and asked to get the lock on your door changed, making up some excuse that your key kept getting stuck. He told you it could be done that day, but that it would cost you extra. You hated paying more, but keeping Billy out was more important, and you’d happily pay more to be able to sleep soundly that night.
After the previous night, you didn’t expect to see him again. You thought Billy would at least possess enough decency to give you some space. But decent and Billy were apparently mutually exclusive.
He was there when you reached the bar, earlier than usual and sitting at his usual table at the back. And, while he watched you enter the bar to start your shift, his gaze soon dropped back to the table in front of him, like he was deep in thought.
You looked at Jenna and she gave a shrug.
“He’s been like that for over an hour,” she said.
Good, you thought. Maybe he was feeling some remorse for what he’d put you through.
You got to work, chatting for Jeena and trying your best to avoid talking about your date with Marc.
“We’re going to see each other again some time,” you told Jenna with a shrug, wanting to make it seem like the night hadn’t been a complete failure. 
An hour passed and Billy hadn’t moved from his seat, but you���d started to notice the way he kept touching and holding his head like he was in pain. At first, you did your best to ignore it - so what if he felt like shit? It was probably a bad hangover.
But when you noticed a couple of members of his crew slowly filter into the bar and avoid him, you felt an unwanted pang of concern.
You’d seen glimpses of how Billy could be, how he could struggle and how he sometimes seemed to lose control of himself. And, now, you could see that he was in pain. The trauma and damage of whatever had happened to him ran deep and, as angry as you were with him, you wanted to be the cause of his suffering, not his injuries.
You left it a little while longer, until you noticed him wave Jenna over for another drink.
“I’ll get it,” you told her. 
But, instead of reaching for his usual brand of whiskey, you grabbed a glass and filled it with water and ice.
Your stomach knotted as you approached him and placed the glass down in front of him.
“What -” he started and then stopped as he lifted his gaze and realised that it was you and not Jenna standing beside him.
“Drink that,” you told him.
“That’s not what I ordered.”
“Yeah, well, you look like shit, Billy, and if you puke, me and Jenna aren’t cleaning it up,” you said.
“I’m not some fucking little kid. I don’t need a babysitter,” he snapped.
“Don’t fucking talk to me like that,” you snapped back, keeping your voice low so no one could overhear. “You’re lucky you’re in here at all after the shit you pulled last night.”
Before he could answer back, you turned away from him and headed back to the bar, telling Jenna that he was cut off. The way you said it was enough to tell her not to question why.
You made it another hour before things started to get quiet and you asked Jenna if she could close on her own. All you wanted to do was go home, have a hot shower and crawl into bed. You were tired, exhausted from staying up half the night, expecting Billy to let himself into your apartment again while you were sleeping.
More than that, you didn’t want to be around him when he looked so pathetic and broken. Despite everything he’d done to you, it was hard to hate him when he looked that way. And you were nothing if not set on hating him and burying all other feelings you might have for him.
Thankfully, Jenna agreed, still feeling guilty about making you cover for when her brother had been in the hospital. And, besides, it was quiet even for a Thursday.
You didn’t give her a chance to change her mind before heading in the back to grab your jacket and quickly leaving.
A sigh of relief slipped out as you stepped out into the cold night air and started your walk home, blissfully unaware that you weren’t alone until you dared to look over your shoulder. To his credit, he made no effort to hide and, honestly, he was hard to miss; tall, dark and miserable, his gaze fixed on you.
For a time you kept walking, wanting to just ignore him, but the closer he got, the more your blood started to boil.
“What do you want, Billy?” You said, finally stopping to confront him.
“I -” he paused awkwardly, like he didn’t have the answer, like he didn’t even know what he was doing, “- I wanted to say sorry. I just...”
You wondered if it was all an act, or if something had happened to him to spark this drastic change in him.
“Sorry for which part, Billy? Snapping at me? Breaking into my apartment? Fucking up my date with Marc?” You fired off question after question. At this point the list seemed endless and Billy had a lot to answer for.
Discomfort crossed his face at the mention of Marc.
“You deserve better than him.” 
“Really? And what do I deserve, Billy?” You asked angrily. “Someone like you who just wants to own me?”
“No, that’s not -”
“Someone who fucks me like I only exist for their pleasure?”
It was the first time you’d brought up the way that he’d fucked you and how it had made you feel. (Though, if you were to be honest, just because it had made you feel that way didn’t mean you hadn’t enjoyed it.) And, again, you saw a flicker of something uncomfortable on his face, as if your words were causing him physical pain.
“You - you liked it. I know you wanted it...” he said, managing to sound nothing short of uncertain.
Your heart gave an awkward squeeze in your chest when he didn’t fight back, when he didn’t make some smutty comment, or try to tell you what you wanted. Why wasn’t he fighting back?
“You never even bothered to ask what I wanted,” you answered back.
The words seemed to cut him, but that thought brought you no joy. What the fuck was going on with him?
“I -”
You watched as he shook his head, and you quickly started to realise that there was something wrong with him. He was usually so ready with a witty retort or a snappy answer but, now, he seemed almost lost in himself. This muted version of him unsettled you and you didn’t like it. You wanted the Billy who would take your rage, not the one who seemed like he might break if you said one more vicious word.
He moved before you could think to stop him, his hands holding your face as he pressed his lips to yours, kissing you and pushing you back. Even the kiss felt different; although it was eager, it wasn’t demanding. Instead, there was a hint of desperation to it that had you hesitating before pulling away.
“Stop,” you gasped against his lips, your hands on his chest, pushing him away.
You heard him take a ragged breath before he spoke. “Please. I - I need you...”
You would have rolled your eyes at his begging if it wasn’t for the catch in his voice, the broken tone that spoke of a pain far greater than a simple headache. His hands stayed on your face, holding you in place while your eyes searched his, desperately trying to understand what was happening.
This - whatever the hell it was - was different. This wasn’t Billy trying to stake some claim on you or get into your pants. He seemed desperate, like he needed someone, needed you to be there for him.
Something had happened between the phone call last night and this evening, something far more than his headache. You thought back to the bar, back to how people had been avoiding him and how Jake hadn’t been with him. Something was going on and you knew that you needed to get to the bottom of it if you ever stood a chance of getting him to leave you alone.
You covered his hands with yours but made no attempt to pull them away from your face.
“What’s going on? What happened today, Billy?” You dared to ask, even though you’re sure it’d only end with you getting pulled further into whatever mess he’s involved with. “Why are you being like this?”
His chest shuddered as he took a ragged breath, a flicker of panic on his face as he realised that he couldn’t quite draw breath. The confident and controlled man that you knew disappeared and you weren’t sure what had replaced him. 
“Billy...” you said, trying to keep him grounded in the moment.
He pulled away and turned his back to you but you could still hear his awkward, gasped breaths. He was having a panic attack and you had no idea if you were the cause but you felt responsible.
“Every night,” he said, a hand lifting to the side of his head, fingers pressing roughly against his scalp. “Every night, the same thing comes at me, over and over. That - that fucking skull! A-and it was him all along!”
Every night. He was talking about his nightmares, like the one you’d witnessed him having in your bed.
“Who, Billy?” You ask, trying to understand. “I don’t know what you’re -”
“I couldn’t see it. I didn’t want to see it.” His words were broken and awkwardly forced out between disparate breaths. “I don’t understand why he’d - why would he do it? Why?”
Against your better judgement, you reached for him, your hand finding his shoulder, forcing him to face you. You regretted the decision immediately, almost drawing back when his wild eyes fixed on you.
“Billy, you’re scaring me,” you said quietly. 
It was an admission that you didn’t make lightly, but you didn’t know what else to say, how else to try and pull him out of whatever his was. Part of you wanted to just leave him there, but another part was worried it wouldn’t be as easy as simply walking away from him. In his current state, you weren’t even sure he’d let you leave.
“It was him,” Billy repeated.
“What was him, Billy? What did he do?”
“This!” He said, his hand held inches from his face.
Obviously something had finally shaken the memory loose in Billy, and as he’d predicted, he didn’t like what he’d remembered. Now he was being forced to try and unravel his traumatic memories.
“Why?” You asked. “Why did he hurt you?”
“I don’t -” he gasped for breath, trapped by his panic, “- I don’t know. I know that it was him, but I don’t feel it. In here, I don’t feel it...” He struck his chest above his heart. “My best friend. He was my best friend, my brother, but he was pointing a gun at me.”
“When? When did he point a gun at you?”
You knew that you were better off not knowing, that none of this was helping in your plan to get Billy out of your life, but seeing him standing there, in so much pain brought up your own painful memories.
“I’d give my life for him. My life!” he continued, seeming to ignore your question. “And he knows that. So why - why would he do this to me?”
His hand pressed against his head again, pain obvious on his face.
“Billy -” you tried again to snap him out of it.
“How did they make him hate me?” He said, every word sounding like it was agony to speak. “How can I trust anyone if I can’t trust Frank? He was family to me, all I had. Now there’s nothing, no one. I’m alone again.”
Without warning, he slammed the heel of his palm down against the side of his head, as if he was desperate to mute his emotional turmoil with physical pain. Again and again, he struck himself, seeming more fraught and more lost with every moment that passed.
“Billy, stop! You’re not alone,” you said before you could even stop to think about what you were saying. You just wanted him to stop, you wanted the whole fucking moment to stop. “You’re not alone, Billy. I’m right here.”
You dared to reach for him again, fingers wrapping tight around his wrist, pulling his arm towards you, finally managing to get his attention.
“You’re here?” He said with a shake of his head. “They were all here, but they were never really here. They let me in, but never all the way. They always left me on the outside. Don’t you understand?”
“I -”
Even though Billy was the one breaking down, his question left you feeling exposed. He always left you feeling exposed. It was the most terrifying thing about him. 
Your chest ached to see him in such pain because it was a pain you understood, albeit for entirely different reasons. You too had been betrayed by someone you cared about, someone you loved and, like Billy, you’d spent your life on the fringes, a perpetual outsider.
In the silence, he stared at you, desperate to hear your response. The only sound between you was his ragged breathing. It didn’t even occur to you that you were still holding his wrist, the perfect mirror of that night in your apartment weeks ago.
“You know I understand,” you said quietly. Another admission that you hadn’t ever wanted to make.
That was the problem with Billy; he saw too much. He saw you. And, finally you were starting to understand why. You were so alike in all the worst ways, and it was that thought that kept you with him, holding onto him despite everything he’d done because you knew how much it hurt to feel so lost and alone. After weeks of confusion, you were starting to understand him.
“You’re here?” He asked in little more than a whisper, the pain on his face easing a little.
“I’m here right now,” you said, knowing it was all you could offer him.
“Right now?” He repeated, a gut wrenching sadness in his voice.
“I can’t give you anymore than that,” you managed to force out, though your heart ached for this version of him. 
Billy just kept on staring at you with those dark eyes that betrayed so much of what he was feeling; the loneliness, the longing, the sorrow
When his hand found your cheek, you didn’t even think about pulling away, about putting up your guard and trying to keep him at a distance. You were lost in those eyes, staring into the void and watching it stare straight back. Finally, you could see him, and you knew that he could see you.
Then he started to lean and you felt your heart stutter, expecting things to rapidly escalate, for the strange bubble you found yourself in to be burst by wants and desires you knew you couldn’t reciprocate.
But his lips barely touched yours, the ghost of a touch, the promise of a kiss not realised. It was as if he was afraid, as if he now saw you as someone else who might betray or abandon him - and, what hurt most, was the thought that he was right.
Abandoning him was all you could do. It was the only certainty that you could offer him.
“Billy -” you whispered softly, your lips brushing against his as you spoke, finding yourself cut off by another gentle kiss.
“I can be gentle,” he said just as quietly, like that was the problem, like that was the reason you couldn’t be with him. “I can be anything you want, if you’d just want me...”
“That’s not -” you started to explain only to be interrupted by another tender kiss.
For a few sweet minutes, you lost yourself to him; to his gentle kisses and the way that he clung to you. It would have been a lie to say that some part of you didn’t want to surrender to him, to give in to the tenderness that you both seemed to need so desperately, but you knew it wouldn’t be fair. You couldn’t give Billy that and then walk away from him.
As much as he pissed you off, you didn’t want to hurt him like that.
“Billy, I can’t,” you finally managed, your free hand found his chest and gently pushed him back a step. “I’m sorry about whatever’s going on with you, but I can’t give you what you need - not because of you or how you are, but because of me and my issues.”
His hand remained stubbornly on your cheek, refusing to let you push him away completely. For a second he just looked at you, then he shook his head, unwilling to accept what you were telling him. His breathing still sounded forced, awkward, but not as bad as it had been.
“I’ll keep you safe,” he told you, “whatever you’re running from, I’ll protect you.”
With that, he moved forward again, kissing, though not softly like he had before, this time with more need, more urgency. And, oh, how you wanted to just give in to him, consequences be damned.
A shiver ran down your spine as his tongue slipped between your lips and his body pressed you back against the wall. The kiss silenced everything; your thoughts and doubts, the echo of your heartbeat, even the sounds of the noisy city. In that moment, you knew he was telling the truth, that he’d do whatever he could to keep you safe, but you also knew you couldn’t let him carry that burden.
“Billy -” you managed to gasp, gently pushing him back again, “- I can’t. We can’t.”
You braced yourself for more desperate pleas, for anger and upset. Instead, all you got was a shaky sigh and, when he closed the space between you, it was to rest his forehead against yours.
“You’re mine,” he whispered. “I can’t stop. I won’t. Even if it takes the rest of my life to make you realise it, I’ll never let you go.”
And, then, he pulled away, turning and leaving you all alone on the dark, empty street. Your eyes followed him as your heart pounded wildly in your chest. When you found the strength to move, you found yourself thinking over what had happened and everything new that you’d learned, everything new that you’d felt.
He left you a wreck, unsure of yourself and what you wanted and, when you finally reached your apartment, you couldn’t help but feel angry at yourself for letting him confuse you. 
How could you want him? How could you feel anything for him after everything that he’d done? But, fuck, the way he’d kissed you, the tenderness that you hadn’t even realised that he possessed - you couldn’t help but wish your circumstances were different and that you’d met him somewhere else, and that your life wasn't so complicated.
End Note : I lost track of time so I'm posting this a bit late. I feel kind of dirty for repurposing a conversation that Billy had with Krista in the show but I really wanted to do something similar. Anyway, this was a little glimpse into Billy's side of things and I hope you enjoyed it!
As always your comments/likes/reblogs/asks/general screaming is always cherished and appreciated. I hope you all have an amazing weekend!
Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters! If tagging doesn't work for some reason (aka Tumblr being dumb) I post most Fridays around 7:30 gmt (and on AO3 at some point in the hours after).
Tag List : @xxxsweetcarolinexxx @sweetserendipity65 @dreadfulxives18 @snowkestrel @ladyblacky
@readingabouthim @cheshirecat484 @broadwaybabe18 @oliviaewl @lincerad
@benbarnesprettygurl @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @whereismymindnow @danzer8705 @judig92 @everything015 @unlikelystarlightcowboy
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aquaholicsanonymousworld · 2 months ago
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Hollow Rounds: A Punisher Fanfiction
Pairing: Frank Castle x Reader
Summary: She trusted Frank Castle. She believed him when he said he’d always be there. But when the bullets started flying, when the blood soaked through her clothes, when she screamed his name into the void—he wasn’t. Now, she’s standing in front of him, hands shaking, voice hoarse, gun pointed at the one man who was supposed to have her back. This was Billy Russo’s plan. Divide them. Break them. But betrayal cuts deeper than any bullet, and she can’t tell if the real wound is in her ribs or in her chest.
Gunfire rang out in rapid succession, bullets tearing through the night. The air was thick with smoke, the scent of gunpowder, sweat, and blood mixing into something suffocating. The world was a blur—shouting, screaming, bodies dropping to the ground. She was running, her legs carrying her forward before her mind even had time to catch up.
She had screamed for him. Castle! Castle! Castle! Again and again. Nothing.
The betrayal stung worse than the cut on her side, worse than the bruises she already knew would form along her ribs. Her body ached from the recoil of the fight, muscles burning from exertion, but the pain was nothing compared to the hollow ache in her chest.
She stumbled into the elevator, the cold metal walls pressing against her as she tried to steady herself. Her breaths came sharp and ragged. The doors slid shut, and for a brief moment, she was alone—just her and the distant sound of chaos below.
Then the doors opened, and there he was. Frank Castle.
She lifted her gun before she could think better of it, hands shaking from something that wasn’t fear but fury.
“Where were you? I-” Her voice came out gravelly and hoarse, barely above a whisper.
She looked at Frank, betrayed. Somber. Covered head to toe in someone else's blood. The adrenaline and anger made her cry.
“Kid, look-” Frank took a step toward her.
“No! Tell me where the fuck you were!” she snapped, pointing her gun. What was left of her voice echoed in the elevator, the only other sound being the hum of the motor as it ascended. Her throat burned from screaming.
It all happened so fast. The shooting, the blood—her adrenaline had been running high until she reached the elevator, trying her hardest to piece together what was happening. This was all Russo’s plan.
“I needed you. I fucking needed you. You told me I just had to call and you’d be there. But you weren’t,” she said in disbelief. Even saying the words felt unreal.
“Listen to me. This is all part of Russo’s plan. This is what he wants. Do not turn on me now, kid. You hear me?” His voice was low, raspy.
He stepped closer to her, hands raised in surrender. She stared at him, searching for an answer she didn’t have. He breathed deeply as their foreheads came together, eyes closed.
“You’re not gonna lose me,” he murmured.
A heavy silence followed.
“It’s always someone else but me, isn’t it?” she whispered, her voice cracking under the weight of it.
Frank’s brows knit together, confusion flickering into something softer—something close to sadness. He lifted a hand, gently tilting her chin up to make her meet his gaze.
“Don’t start with that pity shit, kid,” he said, firm but not unkind. There was something raw in his tone, something that told her he hated the thought of her believing that. Hated that she could ever think of herself as anyone’s second choice.
She let out a bitter breath, ignoring his protest. “Elektra. Karen. Madani. It’s never me, Frank. I always get passed up for what’s new, what’s more important.” Her fists clenched at her sides, nails biting into her palms. It wasn’t just frustration—it was rage, quiet and consuming, boiling beneath her skin.
Frank exhaled sharply, his grip tightening just slightly. “That what you think?” he asked, his voice rough. “That you don’t matter? That I’d just leave you behind?”
She didn’t answer. Couldn’t. Because she wanted to believe him. But all she could feel was the ache in her chest, the gnawing fear that maybe this was just how it always ended.
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mrs-barnes-rogers-writes · 1 year ago
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A Second Chance Is A Better Chance - Part 10
Marvel AU
Pairing: Alpha Steve Rogers x Omega Witch Reader, eventual ? x Omega Witch Reader and Alpha Steve Rogers X Omega Witch Reader
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Summary: Rejected by your true mate at 21, you’ve given up on the Fates and the Moon Goddesses giving you a second chance. Being a Roamer for the last 9 years, you’re an Omega hardened by the world. You’re safe on your own because of your witchcraft, but it doesn’t stop Alphas and plenty of others sniffing around, especially when you’re an unmated Omega witch, who’s wolf also happens to be white, the rarest kind. You don’t need anyone, but why do you keep coming back to Brookville and why do you keep walking into trouble and helping people that you don’t know but for some strange reason feel like family. And where is that smell of apple pie coming from?
Series Warnings: A/B/O, eventual smut, violence in parts, witchcraft, shapeshifters
Chapter Summary: Reader and Castle's pack head towards the fight.
Chapter Warnings: Mentions of past violence and torture. Talk of the witch wound.
The witch trials were a lonely time for witches. A time of little trust, of exposure and betrayal. A friend could turn on you in a heartbeat. Mates would deny their connection to their witch partners, to protect themselves, their children and reputations.
The torture, treatment and loss of thousands of witches, continued to ripple into the generations, the witch wound a tear in every witch’s soul.
“The witch wound will always be in every single one of us,” Fiona had told you “it’s a dark mark in our history but it’s also something that we live with, which we fight with, every single day. It binds up together. Think of it as a string, that connects us all.”
You weren’t a fan of Fiona’s history lessons but she was adamant that it was part of your training, to give you a better understanding of powers and what it meant to be a witch. Combining every single thing you knew and your powers, would make you stronger. Agatha knew everything and anything there was to know about witches, the history and everything in-between, so you needed to too.
“You can’t let her or her sidekicks get the upper hand because you’re being a stubborn smartass and she can see a weak spot.”
Now, as you sat in the back of one of Castle’s ex-military trucks, Billy and Elektra across from you, you pulled on the wound. Your back upright and straight, with your palms open and facing upwards, you whispered to yourself, a mix of light language, Latin and English intertwined. Your strength growing from the pulling of the wound and the pull of your ancestors.
You tensed suddenly, sensing Agatha the close you got, and Billy went to learn forward to touch you but was stopped abruptly as Elecktra grabbed his arm. He went to speak but she was quick to mind link to him.
“Don’t.”
“But…”
“She’s preparing for the fight Russo. You’ve seen witches do this plenty of times in the field.”
“They weren’t her.”
You stopped their conversation as your voice broke through the silence.
“Agatha is the only witch there but she has fresh powers.”
“What do you mean Princess?” Billy asked.
“She’s killed another witch recently, very recently and took their powers.”
Frank shook his head. This should never have happened. The authorities, the powers that be will never learn their lesson and when it came to witches, they would never learn unless they listened to the W.A.C.
“Anything else?” Elektra asked. Billy’s head snapped to look at Elektra.
“What are you doing?” he asked, not bothering to mind link.
“She’s stronger than you think Russo.”
“Baby?” Frank asked.
“She’s pissed off. Annoyed. She’s being thrown off by the shield and the locals using the oils and salt.”
You pulled again on the wound and you jolted as you felt a pull back. A wave of familiarity waved through you. Thoughts of Fiona, Cordelia and Maddison filled the back of your subconscious, they were quickly pushed to the side as Jean, Storm and the witches of the X-Pack pushed through. You felt another stronger pull on the wound.
You allowed yourself to open up more and felt a flurry of heat rush up your body. You ears became muffled like you were underwater and then you felt it, like the snapping of an elastic band into your chest and a rush of energy, strength and power and then her. Agatha.
You could see her. She couldn’t see you but you could see her and the Hydra goons that were with her. You could hear the whimpers of the injured security guards in the box, now safe behind your shield, and the yells of the rogues telling Agatha to break it down. You smirked and flickered your fingers to make it jump with static, Agatha’s eyes growing wider.
You heard a faint voice. Luke.
“ETA two minutes.”
You stayed in your trance, watching Agatha and the Hydra agents. The latter pulling what appeared to be hostages from a van. Frank kept his eyes on the road as much as possible, scanning the surrounding area, glancing back at you when the chance arose.
Your voice was strong but quiet.
“I see her.”
Four sets of eyes went wide and you reached out your hands. One towards Billy and Elektra, and the other towards Frank. You connected with them and let them see what you could, as the Hydra morons spread out, Agatha looked around frantically. Nobody, no witch, had ever kept her out of anywhere. Apart from one. The one that had stopped her getting into the town where those coven school witches were hiding.
You felt the pull of your sister witches again and quickly released hands with the others. A rush through you brought messages.
“End this.”
“Never take your eyes of her.”
“Remember everything, everything I taught you, every single part.”
And then a final message from Maddison.
“Snap that bitch.”
A rush through your body caused you to gasp, as the truck came to a halt, Frank’s orders of positions coming through.
“On my mark.”
Elektra and Billy pulled out their guns and knocked off the safetys, their eyes never leaving you.
“Rarity? You good?”
Your eyes snapped open and you smirked. Billy felt like he’d been punched in the chest. You were more beautiful he had ever seen you. Your eyes had turned gold when you started the shield, but now they were brighter, and your skin and hair seemed to be glowing.
The smirk though, the smirk was nearly unnerving. You were beautiful and slightly terrifying all at the same time.
It was then they realised.
You weren’t a six at all. You were a seven. And you were ready to snap Agatha Harkness like she deserved.
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lewisvinga · 9 months ago
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woso masterlist.
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alexia putellas
mapi león
ingrid engen
salma paralluelo
aitana bonmati
jenni hermoso
misa rodriguez
leila ouahabi
lucy bronze
ona batlle
leah williamson
alessia russo
lena oberdorf
elisa de almeida
a/n; probably missing a few bc i’m open to write for others if given the requests, just ask if ur curious!
omg a madridista writing more for fcb fem players😞😞😞😞 it lowk feels like betrayal but i am just a girl at the end of the day w eyes for pretty girls 💗_💗
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libramuva · 5 days ago
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Historical Anime Adventures: A Journey Through Time
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Listen up, history nerds who also happen to love anime! ✨ Today I'm taking you on a journey through time via some of the most captivating historical anime series ever created. There's something magical about seeing different eras of Japanese history brought to life through animation, whether they're strictly historically accurate or take creative liberties with supernatural elements.
Samurai Era Brilliance
Rurouni Kenshin - The quintessential Meiji-era (1868-1912) samurai tale. Following a former assassin seeking redemption, this series beautifully captures the tension between traditional samurai values and Japan's rapid modernization. The OVA "Trust and Betrayal" is particularly stunning in how it portrays the bloody final days of the Tokugawa shogunate.
Samurai Champloo - Edo period (1603-1868) but make it hip-hop! This stylish series follows three unlikely companions on a journey across Japan. The anachronistic blend of traditional samurai culture with modern music and sensibilities somehow WORKS and creates something truly unique.
House of Five Leaves - A quieter, more contemplative look at the samurai era focusing on a ronin who gets involved with a gang. The watercolor-inspired art style perfectly complements this subtle character study set in the Edo period.
Imperial Court Dramas
The Tale of Genji - Adapted from what's considered the world's first novel, this series explores the political intrigues and romantic entanglements of the Heian court (794-1185). The attention to historical detail in the clothing, architecture, and court customs is incredible.
Saiunkoku Monogatari - While set in a fictional country, this series draws heavy inspiration from imperial China and features a determined young woman navigating court politics. The gorgeous animation brings to life the opulent palace settings and elaborate costumes.
Wartime Stories That Hit Different
In This Corner of the World - A deeply moving look at everyday life in Hiroshima during WWII. Rather than focusing on soldiers or political leaders, it shows how ordinary people tried to maintain normalcy amid air raids and rationing. Prepare to cry.
Grave of the Fireflies - Set during the final months of WWII, this devastating film follows two siblings struggling to survive after losing their parents in the firebombing of Kobe. It's one of the most powerful anti-war films ever made.
Golden Kamuy - Set in the aftermath of the Russo-Japanese War, this wild adventure combines historical elements with treasure hunting and Ainu culture. The attention to historical accuracy (especially regarding the Ainu people) is impressive despite the sometimes outlandish plot.
Fantasy Historical Settings
Dororo - Set during the warring states period (Sengoku, 1467-1615), this dark fantasy follows a samurai hunting demons to reclaim his body parts. The backdrop of war, famine, and social upheaval provides a historically grounded setting for the supernatural elements.
Inuyasha - Time travel from modern Japan to the feudal era creates a fun contrast between worlds. While not strictly historically accurate, it incorporates many elements of Japanese folklore and history into its fantasy setting.
Why Historical Anime Hits Different
What makes these series so compelling is how they use animation to bring history to life in ways live action sometimes can't. Animation allows for both historical accuracy in settings and the freedom to explore emotional truths through stylistic choices. Plus, many of these shows explore perspectives often overlooked in traditional historical narratives.
What's your favorite historical anime? Are you more into strictly accurate jidaigeki or do you prefer when they mix in fantasy elements? Drop your thoughts below!
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e-dubbc11 · 2 years ago
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for the song lyric prompt, I'm presenting you the super classic 'with or without you' with the most incredible obsessive love presence and our fave obsessive man: billy
My dear Selene,
I love this song, it’s one of my favorites! Thank you for sending this one in. My head has been wrapped around writing for Rumlow the past couple of weeks and I’ve missed writing for Billy so I hope you like what I did here
Thank you again!
With or Without You
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Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.
Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader
Warnings: little bit of angst, fluff
Word Count: 1.3k-ish
Summary: You see a picture of Billy that you’re not very happy with
A/N: This is one of my favorite songs even though I don’t like U2 all that much.
As always, thank you for reading!  I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕
He was so stubborn but you were too.
Billy Russo made you absolutely crazy. No other man frustrated you like he did but you’ve never loved anyone as much as you loved him either which is why seeing that picture of him online kissing another woman shattered your heart.
The ache you felt in your chest was unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. It was betrayal on another level as tears pricked your eyes scrolling through social media and stopping on a grainy picture of Billy’s lips locked on someone else’s other than yours.
It was from the event that you weren’t able to attend with him because you didn’t feel well.
He told you, “Of course it’s alright, sweet girl. Just get some rest, I love you.”
“I love you.”
Those words were hard for him to say at first, he had never said them and meant it until he fell for you. That’s what he told you, so how could he do this to you? Just like it was difficult to give his heart to someone, it was hard for you to give your heart away too.
All of the others had no problem taking and taking from you but in the end you were alone with a feeling of emptiness from the pieces of you they selfishly took with them when they left.
Against your better judgement, his too, you both opened up your souls to each other, leaving your hearts vulnerable to everything you worked so hard to protect.
Sometimes it was so hard to live with him, even though you didn’t physically live WITH him. The long hours, the constant worrying about him, hoping he was alright taking on so many jobs, and the exhaustion plastered all over his face…you’ve never known anyone that worked as hard as he did.
You didn’t want to live without him though. Billy made you crazy, fights with him made you want to rip your hair out, his jealousy sometimes got out of control but yours did too, hence the rage you felt burning inside your body right now.
You wanted to find that woman and tear her limb from limb, break all of her fingers that were holding Billy’s head in place while she kissed him, and make sure she never messes with another woman’s boyfriend again.
Several texts from Billy came through as you continued to stare at the photo, tears stinging your eyes like stars burning against the night sky.
“Please talk to me, sweet girl.”
“I really need to talk to you.”
“I love you, baby…please answer me.”
Newspapers and websites marketed Billy as an “eligible” bachelor, even though he was in a relationship with you. They built him up to be a local celebrity. From humble beginnings to a handsome successful CEO, Billy Russo was the object of every woman’s affection and you knew what you were getting yourself into when you started dating him but you thought you could handle it.
And you could, until now. You didn’t want to break up with him but you couldn’t look at him or talk to him right now, it hurt too much.
Seeing that photo broke you and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t bring yourself to leave the house that day. The caption for the photo made you breathless with anger and caused your mouth to tighten.
“Where’s your girlfriend tonight, Billy Russo?”
**********
Dark gray clouds blanketed the early afternoon sky while the autumn winds blew around the sparse branches of the trees down below. You could feel the draft coming into your apartment from the weakened seals in the windows that your landlord said he was going to replace months ago. Thankfully your favorite sweater was keeping you warm as you sat down on the couch to enjoy a cup of hot tea.
Loud raps against your door startled you before you could take your first sip, almost spilling the tea into your lap.
“Baby, open the door please! I know you’re home, you haven’t left the house all day.” He said loudly so you could hear him from the other side of the door.
How does he know that? Was he spying on you?
“I don’t wanna talk to you right now, Billy!” You shouted.
Suddenly, the front door flew open and crashed against the wall. Billy had told you before that your front door should be replaced because of how old it is.
Well, he wasn’t wrong and now it definitely needs to be replaced but you were furious because of how far he took it. Just like the door, he was unhinged. But again, that’s Billy. Always quick to fly off the handle.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!!!” You yelled. “ARE YOU INSANE?!!”
You stood up and set your tea on the coffee table as Billy walked over to you.
“I’m not leaving until I explain myself, y/n! I know you’re angry, I know you saw the photo but that woman kissed ME, alright?!! Yeah, I had more to drink that I usually do at these things but I was upset that you weren’t with me last night!” He confessed.
You stood there looking at him with a confused look on your face. You had been to a lot of these fundraiser events with Billy, why was he so upset about you not being at this one?
“I wasn’t feeling well, Billy. I said I was sorry and you said it was ok! Go in my room, the dress I wanted to wear is still hanging on the edge of the door, I didn’t do this on purpose!” You exclaimed.
His expression softened and he was visibly upset, but he wasn’t angry.
Billy lowered his voice. “I know you didn’t, I just…had something planned, that’s all. And I pushed her away as soon as her lips touched mine, ask Frankie.”
You could tell Billy felt terrible for what happened and you…believed him.
“She had been following me around all night. I’m so sorry, sweet girl, I’m sorry.” He said softly.
“What did you have planned, Billy?” You said, remembering what he mentioned a minute ago.
He ran his long fingers through is ebony colored hair and brushed his beard as he paced back and forth, looking very nervous about what he was going to say next.
“I was gonna ask you if…if you would move in with me.” He said.
You felt your stomach drop and start to flutter. Your eyes welled up with tears, happy tears this time.
“Billy…I—I” You started to say.
He interrupted you. “I know we’re together most of the time but on nights that we’re not, I don’t like going to bed alone or waking up alone. I don’t like being without you. I love you.”
Billy inched closer to you, close enough to inhale the scent of his cologne and you felt his warm breath on your lashes.
You snaked your arms around his neck and gazed into his deep brown eyes. “I love you too, handsome. You make me absolutely nuts but I’d rather be with you than without you, so my answer is yes.”
Gently scraping your nails against his scalp, you pulled him closer so you could kiss him which he gladly returned. He loved being touched by you, and only you.
“I told you that you needed a new door, that thing was easy to kick in.” He chuckled.
You playfully slapped his shoulder. “You lunatic, I’m gonna get in so much trouble for that! I know I’m gonna be leaving anyway but you owe me a new door, Mr. Russo.”
He kissed you on the forehead. “I’ll get you a new door, baby…I’ll get you whatever you want.”
Through the storm, we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And I'm waiting for you
With or without you
With or without you, ah, ah
I can't live
With or without you
Tag List: @mindidjarin @saintmurd0ck @wheresthesunshinesblog @rafaelakelley @idaoftheburningmind @snowkestrel @xdervyxccgh @mattmurdocksscars @fakehappy27 @music-indie-tv @fictional-hooman @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @celestialams @idek-what-to-put @anastasianeedstoread @ratsys @k-marzolf @nutmeg17 @rosaleenablack @vaguekayla @qu1etwolf @danzer8705
Others that might enjoy: @itwasthereaminuteago @fluffyprettykitty @jvanilly @russosafehaven @mrsbillyrusso @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend
If you’d like to be added (or removed from) my tag list(s) for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕 If I tagged you but you didn’t want to be, just let me know and I’ll never do it again.
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insanityclause · 2 months ago
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Avengers filming is starting in March in London so I wonder if any of Tom´s co-stars from Marvel will go to see the play. Him and Haylee have been in the MCU since the beginning and know the others well. Chris H. is in London (probably spoke to Tom on his birthday). Also, I still think the wrap in the beginning of April means Tom actually will be in the movie, he is just not confirmed yet (as many others)
*Hayley
You know, the Russos went to see Betrayal in London, so it wouldn't surprise me if they showed up at some point. Other than that? I would guess Benedict will show up at some point.
Would be cool if Seb and Florence went at some point - Florence I think is more likely, as she also went to see Betrayal.
It also wouldn't totally surprise me if Tom Cruise showed up at one point, to see Hayley in the play - right before MI promo starts.
I think the wrap in April is probably more for Hayley's schedule and to make way for Hercules.
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petertingle-yipyip · 1 year ago
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world class sinner - frank castle (masterlist)
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season 2 // FULL SERIES
pairings: billy russo x livia yersova (former widow!oc) , frank castle x livia yersova , punisher x exodus
summary: with daredevil dead, exodus returns from Quantico unsure of who she should be. fighting nightmares and deja vu, small sparks threaten to revive something saved for matt murdock before a shocking betrayal rattles New York’s two most dangerous vigilantes.
(1) - deja vu : Being back in the Kitchen almost immediately pulls her back into a fight. But without Matt, what has she become?
(2) if he had been with me: Further and further her humanity goes as Livia commits herself to Frank Castle's crusade. Small moments threaten to bring her back, but how can she when there's nothing worth it... Or is there.
(3) haunted: Can’t breathe, can’t turn back. Livia continues to walk the fragile line of her morality while finding an uneasy comfort in the presence of Billy Russo, despite being haunted by Matt Murdock’s memory. But reuniting with Frank Castle makes it little less miserable.
(4) aftermath: A quick run nearly turns disastrous when a bold move goes wrong. An attempted reconciliation between friends turns nasty, all because the aftermath of Midland Circle still lingers in Livia’s actions.
(5) build god then we'll talk: Temporary alliances form on one side before fighting off an ambush from the other. All the while, dots are connecting for more than one player as the game grows more and more dangerous.
(6) so what now? : Limits are pushed and more secrets pile up as she continues to pretend on both sides. When they creep closer to one another, can she maintain all of her lies and save face or will she be forced to pick what relationship matters most?
(7) so it goes… : All eyes on her, a skilled illusionist. Playing the field for information gets what she needed but could threaten the relationship keeping her afloat.
(8) beautiful liar : A breaking point, new alliances, and seeds of mutual trust show Livia who is and who isn’t on her side.
(9) bad omens: Lingering omens finally register and truths are revealed through blood, bullets, and betrayals.
(10) is it over now?: A long time coming, one fight comes to a bloody conclusion. Another lurks in the near future, and the connection between two friends and two lover is severed.
(11) sinner: It all comes down to one final night, where’s it all began. One who thinks he’s a god versus the one who once scared the Devil and the Punisher. The Devil wasn’t wrong after all to fear the evil she delivers.
(epilogue) i know it won’t work: After a couple weeks, Livia decides to open Frank’s letter.
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hungermakesmonsters · 1 year ago
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Catch Me If You Can
Chapter Eighteen
Plot summary : When your friend interviews for a position at Anvil, you have a chance encounter with Billy Russo. He takes you for coffee and, by the time you’re done, Billy decides he’s anything but done with you.
Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader
Story Rating : R 
Chapter Rating : PG
Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] There's some dark stuff pertaining to an abusive past relationship, attempted murder, and vague details of a car crash. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 
Word Count : ~4.4k
A/N : Set about a week after the last one! I'm honestly a little nervous about this chapter, I hope you like it! As always thanks so much for reading!
CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO | CHAPTER THREE | CHAPTER FOUR | CHAPTER FIVE | CHAPTER SIX | CHAPTER SEVEN | CHAPTER EIGHT | CHAPTER NINE | CHAPTER TEN | CHAPTER ELEVEN | CHAPTER TWELVE | CHAPTER THIRTEEN | CHAPTER FOURTEEN | CHAPTER FIFTEEN | CHAPTER SIXTEEN | CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Chapter Eighteen
The whole world came crashing down around you in a single moment. 
You didn’t realise until it was too late to stop it, until it was too late to change anything and avoid the inevitable consequences.
The private investigator took the envelope full of cash before sliding the file across the table to you, sparing you one last glance and a couple of words of warning before climbing out of the booth and heading towards the exit. Your gaze followed him out of the diner and onto the street, where he walked past -
Your heart stopped.
Frank.
He had his phone out, pointing right at you through the diner window, a mix of betrayal and disappointment on his face. It took a moment to figure out what was happening, for the penny to finally drop, but when it did, you felt your entire body fill with panic; he thought you were the security threat, the person who’d been digging into anvil over the last couple of months. 
Your heart started to race, knowing that he was going to tell Billy what he thought he’d seen, that he’d seen you paying off the PI who’d been snooping around Anvil. You scrambled out of the booth, almost tripping over your own feet, desperate to get to Frank and fix the situation before it spiralled out of control.
But he was already on the phone by the time you got outside. You kept the file clutched to your chest, holding it against you like a shield as you approached the imposing figure of Frank Castle, stomach knotting as you heard him speak.
“Yeah, Bill, I’ll deal with it,” his eyes fixed on you as you stopped in front of him. 
You waited in silence, for a moment thinking you could just about hear Billy’s voice on the other end of the phone before Frank hung up and dropped his phone into his pocket.
“I’m gonna need you to give me that,” Frank said, holding out his hand, expecting you to hand the file over. 
“I can’t.” Because, despite everything that was happening, you knew one thing for sure; you couldn’t let anyone see the file, couldn’t let them know about your past.
“Y’know, the crazy thing is that I thought Bill was gonna be the one to break your heart, not the other way around,” Frank shook his head.
“You don’t understand -”
“Pretty sure I do,” he interrupted, not willing to listen to your explanations, “you’ve had your PI lookin’ into Anvil and Bill for weeks now, so give it up.”
“No, that’s not -” but you could already tell that he wasn’t going to listen to you, that he’d made up his mind. “I need to see Billy, I have to explain this to him.”
“That’s great ‘cause he’s already waiting at Anvil for you.”
You stared at him for a moment before realising that you had a choice to make - he couldn’t very well bundle you into his car in broad daylight, but you were aware how bad it would look for you if you refused to go with him. You’d just given up every single dollar to your name for the file in your hand and, now, you needed to make sure that it hadn’t all been for nothing.
“Okay,” you relented, “take me to Billy.”
Frank gave a grunt and nodded towards his truck. You followed after him, climbing into the passenger seat and keeping your eyes fixed forward. Once he’d started the engine, you reached for your phone, hastily typing up a message to Karen, wanting to try and explain what was going on before Frank told her.
“Who you texting?” Frank asked suddenly, taking his eyes off the road.
“Karen, I -” he snatched your phone before you could finish, your thumb managing to hit send on the half finished message as he pulled it away from you. “What the fuck?”
“You’re not draggin’ Karen into this shit,” he told you, his eyes returning to the road just in time to keep from running a red light - a sharp stop that caused your anxiety to spike even more, reminding you of the accident years ago. You were so distracted that you only caught the last half of what Frank was saying, “- when Bill’s done with you.”
You didn’t argue, didn’t ask him to repeat himself. You just wanted him to concentrate on the road. So, you remained silent, clutching the file to your chest and watching out the windscreen. The way he drove across the city made your heart race and your chest tighten, practically jumping out of your skin with every screech of brakes or honk of a horn.
And, when you reached Anvil some fifteen minutes later, you were quick to scramble out of the truck, almost gasping for breath.
He gave another grunt, indicating that you should follow him and, stupidly, you did just that. You didn’t realise that anything was wrong until you were in the elevator and realised that you were being taken down to the basement level instead of up to Billy’s office.
“Why aren’t we going to Billy’s office?” You asked, dread already starting to coil in your stomach.
“Bill doesn’t want you in his office,” Frank answered as the doors slid open, revealing a cold and terrifying looking corridor.
“I want my phone back.” You told him, unable to stop the fear from filling your tone.
“Told you, you can have it back when Bill’s done with you,” he motioned for you to start moving and, with no other option, you did.
When the elevator doors slid shut, your thoughts started to spiral to dark places you didn’t want them to go, to memories of feeling trapped and powerless. A lump rose in your throat and tears were already starting to sting your eyes as your footsteps echoed down the long hallway. When Frank stopped and opened a door, you let him usher you inside before you realised your mistake.
The door closed behind you, leaving you trapped and alone in what appeared to be an interrogation room. Had your state of mind been better, you might have realised that the room was used for training new recruits and conducting interviews but, since you were panicking, all you could think was that you were going to be trapped there until you confessed to all of the things you hadn’t done.
You turned back to the door quickly, pulling at the handle. You weren’t surprised to find it locked, but it did nothing to stop the panic that was raging inside of you.
The room had a long metal table and two chairs, one on either side, but you didn’t move to sit. You couldn’t move at all, terror had you rooted in place, your fingers still tightly gripping the file against your chest. There was a camera blinking in the corner of the room and you felt your stomach drop; was Billy watching you right now, could he see the terror on your face? (And, if he could, why wasn’t he coming to help you?)
Minutes passed before Billy stepped into the room. You stayed frozen as he stepped around you and you waited - you waited for him to tell you that this was all some big mistake, that he knew you’d never do the things Frank had accused you of. But it never came. As he took a seat, your eyes closed tight, silently willing yourself to wake up from this nightmare.
Another minute passed in total silence, like he was waiting for you to speak first and dig your own grave, but you couldn’t even look at him, much less form the words you needed to explain all of this to him.
“Just give me the file,” he finally said.
“I can’t,” you shook your head, eyes still closed tight.
“Who are you working for?” There was something cold in his voice, something broken and full of pain and, despite everything he was putting you thought, some part of you longed to comfort him.
“No one, I’m not -”
“Don’t lie to me!” The sound of his open palm hitting the surface of the table caused you to flinch, your eyes opening as you took a step back and pressed yourself against the wall, needing to put as much distance between you and Billy as possible. “You paid someone to look into Anvil, into me.”
“No, that’s not what happened! You don’t understand -”
“What were you after; finances? Mission details? How much were you getting paid?” His tone got sharper with every word.
“I wasn’t after anything, that’s not what this is. It’s not about Anvil -” you tried desperately still, somehow, holding onto some small glimmer of hope that you could fix things before they got too broken.
 “Bullshit!”
“Please, Billy,” you struggled to find the words in your panic, “you promised that you’d trust me, that you’d -”
“I did trust you!”
His use of the past tense caused something to break inside of you, and you felt a sort of pain that you hadn’t felt in years, the sort of pain that could only be inflicted by someone you loved.
“Stop, please, Billy just -” you tried again, blinking back tears.
Everything was falling apart around you, the future you’d let yourself hope for was slipping away; you were going to move in with him, you were going to go work for The Bulletin, and you were finally going to start rebuilding your life after so many years of just existing and scraping a living. All your dreams were dying all at once, all because he wouldn’t listen to you, because he couldn’t trust you.
Some part of you knew that if you could just find the words, you’d be able to make him understand, but your panicked, racing mind couldn’t focus enough to say or do anything to help fix things.
“How long?” He asked coldly, ignoring your tears. “How long have you been lying to me, using me?”
“I wasn’t lying! Why won’t you listen to me? Why can’t you trust me?” You heard yourself begging desperately.
“Because you’ve been lying to me for months!” His voice got louder, sharper, and you no longer recognised the man in front of you. This wasn’t your Billy, this was someone else entirely. “You know, you really had me fooled, pretending to be this wounded little thing, acting like you wanted me, like we had something.”
“It wasn’t an act!” You managed to raise your voice to match him, desperate to make him listen, to convince him that you still cared, but Billy didn’t even seem to hear it. “Please, just - just let me explain. I can explain this.”
“Explain what? That none of this was real? That you tricked me into wanting you so you could get close enough to stab me in the back? Did you get paid extra to fuck me or was jumping into my bed just part of the game for you?” You could still hear the pain in his tone, but the moment Billy said those words to you, something inside of you snapped.
Your stomach continued to tie itself in knots. You hated every little thing about this, hated how he thought you were as bad as all of the other people who had used him and lied to him to get what they wanted. But your pain quickly started to turn to anger - he wasn’t the only one who’d ever been hurt, he wasn’t the only one who’d been lied to and used. As hurt as Billy obviously was by this whole situation, he’d broken his promises to you; he wouldn’t listen, wouldn’t hear you out, wouldn’t trust you.
You were being blamed for something you hadn’t done and you were going to lose everything because of it. Again.
“You think I jumped into bed with you?” Your tone turned sharper, colder, and more certain - because, in all of this, if you were certain of one thing, it was that you did not just jump into bed with him. Finally you had his attention, just in time for you to tell him; “falling in love with you is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, Billy. And you’ve just managed to prove why it was such a stupid idea.”
It was the first time you’d dared utter that you loved him aloud, but you were no longer scared of how he was going to react to the revelation or how vulnerable it would make you feel. It was too late to care about any of that. You’d come to Anvil hoping to save things with Billy but that dream was now over. 
And, for the first time since all of this began, you realised that the truth of your past couldn’t hurt you anymore. It didn’t matter if Billy knew because he’d already given up on you, whatever was between you was over now, and everything you’d done to try and preserve it had been for nothing.
“Fine,” you relented, forcing yourself to step away from the wall and towards the table. Once you were close enough you slammed the file down in front of him so hard that its contents spilled out across the table; photographs of you, notes about your work, your friends and your finances. 
Billy’s eyes dropped, quickly looking over it, starting to move things, rummaging through the paperwork, trying to make sense of it.
“It was never about you or Anvil. He was looking for me. And I just spent every penny I had paying him off so I wouldn’t have to leave New York, so I wouldn’t have to leave you. But I guess the jokes on me, because you don’t even care enough to keep your promises to me and just listen for five fucking minutes.” By the time you’d finished, you had to cover your mouth to try and suppress the sobs that were desperate to escape you.
Billy stayed silent, rifling through the pages and photographs in front of him, seeming to become more frantic with every passing second as he looked for something, anything, to prove that he hadn’t just destroyed your relationship for nothing.
You watched him for a second, knowing exactly what he’d find in the file, and knowing the questions he’d inevitably have for you when he found the details of your sister's death, and the car crash that had left you scarred. But it was too late for any of that now, he’d lost any right to ask anything about your past.
Moving back to the door, you gave the handle a sharp tug, even though you were pretty certain that the door was still locked.
“Wait -” his broken tone caused you to bristle. Where once you would have felt compassion, you now only felt anger.
“Let me out.”
“I don’t understand,” he told you, as he got to his feet and started to move towards you, his expression one of confusion instead of anger. You held up a hand, wanting him to keep his distance and Billy stopped. In his hand he was holding a copy of the photograph that he’d seen on your bedside table all those weeks ago, the photo of you and your siblings as children. “Please, help me understand this. I want to understand.”
“Which part, Billy? The part where you refused to listen, when you wouldn’t hear me out, when you wouldn’t trust me like you promised?” A hand scrubbed at your cheek, desperately trying to wipe away your tears, not wanting him to see just how much he’d wounded you. “Or the part where you thought so little of me that you thought I was fucking you just to get information on your company?”
“I didn’t know, I -”
“You wouldn’t let me explain!” You yelled and it was Billy’s turn to flinch at your tone. “I gave up everything I had to get that file, and now it doesn’t even matter. None of this matters anymore.”
“It matters, it -” he tried, obviously struggling for words, “- why didn’t you tell me?
“Why didn’t you believe me?” you threw back at him. ”Why is it so hard for you to trust me? Do you even trust anyone?”
“I’m sorry, I never -”
“Just - just stop. It’s too late.” You shook your head. It hurt too much and every word, every plea that left him only made the ache in your chest feel worse. “You promised me that you’d listen. I trusted you and you ruined it. You’ve ruined us.” 
“No... don’t say that. Please, don’t say that.” His voice continued to crack and break, and it was almost enough to make you want to back down, but you knew you couldn’t. Not after this. He’d broken his promise to you and left you feeling more wounded and alone than you’d ever felt. “I’m sorry, let me fix this, sweetheart, please.”
“Fix this?” You almost managed to laugh through the tears. “There is no fixing this, Billy. You’ve ruined it. You broke my heart.”
“No, no... please, I -” for a moment he looked at you like those three little words were on the tip of his tongue, like he was ready to confess his love, but you didn’t want to hear it.
“Just stop. You don’t get to fight for me, Billy. Not now. Not after this.” You told him angrily. “I told you I couldn’t do this if you didn’t trust me.”
“You said you fell in love with me,” the words came out so softly that you almost didn’t hear them.
You could see the thinly masked distress on his face, the pain and misery that you’d managed to cause with that one, silly admission. You hated yourself for blurting it out like that, like you were some character in a soap opera or some shitty romance novel. And, if he’d been anyone else, you might have been angrier at his obliviousness to your feelings - of course you’d fallen in love with him, it had been so fucking obvious - but Billy had always been honest with you; he didn’t know love, didn’t understand it. All the people who were supposed to love him and abandoned him.
But not you. That was not what this was. You weren’t abandoning him, he’s pushed you to breaking point. This time it was Billy’s fault.
“What did you think was gonna happen?” You dared to ask, not even bothering to try and hide your pain anymore. “I’m not like you, Billy, I can’t just turn off my emotions whenever things get difficult.”
“You love me?” He took a step closer, the look on his face suggesting that he still thought that there was some way that he could fix things.
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“It matters to me, please, I -”
The door opened and, before he could finish that thought, you were rushing back out into the hallway, trying to put as much distance between yourself and Billy as possible. He followed after, your name dying on his lips when he saw Karen and Frank standing there.
“Sorry, Bill, she -” Frank started, looking at Karen who was now holding your phone.
“You’re both assholes,” she stated and neither man dared argue with her. Obviously, thankfully, she’d managed to figure out what was going on and where you were just from the half of a text message that you’d managed to send before Frank had confiscated your phone. 
Her arm quickly pulled around your shoulders and she started to lead you towards the elevator while you tried to choke back tears. You didn’t dare look back until you were in the elevator; Billy looked heartbroken, following after you but keeping his distance.
“Please, I -” he tried.
“You’ve done enough, Billy. Just leave her alone.” Karen snapped as the doors slid shut and, a moment later, the floodgates opened and you started to sob uncontrollably, knowing that you’d lost everything.
TWO HOURS EARLIER.
Your heart was racing, thumping out a painful and uneven beat in your chest.
When Karen had told you that a private investigator had been asking around about you at The Bulletin, you’d put things together pretty quickly. You had her set up a meeting later that morning for you, hoping that you could fix things before they got out of control, even though your every instinct told you to pack a bag and get out of New York as quickly as you could.
You didn’t want to have to run, you didn’t want to leave the life that you were starting to build in the city. You didn’t want to leave the man that you loved.
Before heading to the diner to meet the PI, you stopped at the bank, withdrawing every penny that had, hoping that it would be enough, hoping that you could pay him off and fix everything before things spun out of control.
He was already waiting in the diner when you arrived, sitting in a booth by the window; a grizzled looking guy, well into his forties, who’d obviously been in the PI game for decades. As you slid into the seat opposite him, you felt your guts start to twist with a mix of anxiety and fear.
“If I’d known that this was the quickest way to get you out of hiding, I’d’ve done it weeks ago,” he stated before you’d even gotten comfortable. “I take it you wanted to meet to make me an offer?”
You took a breath, trying to steady your still-racing heart. “How much would it cost for you to go back to Florida and pretend you couldn’t find me?”
He almost seemed shocked that you knew where he was from for a second, but it was quickly hidden behind a lazy sort of smile.
“More than you’ve got,” he stated and your heart sank. “I’m a little surprised that you don’t seem surprised by any of this.”
“I’m not,” you offered, already feeling like you were wasting your time. “I knew it was only a matter of time before Scott started looking for me. Did he tell you why - did he tell you why he wants to find me?”
“No, and I didn’t bother to ask - usually don’t when the money’s this good.” He shrugged before sitting forward in his seat. “Go on then; what’d you do to this guy? I figured you either broke his heart or you took something of his. Must’ve been something big for you to spend these last few years running all up and down the country.”
“I didn’t do anything,” you voice cracked at how helpless you suddenly felt, “He tried to kill me, and that’s probably why he wants me back.”
That seemed to unsettle the PI and you decided to use it to your advantage.
“I take it you know about the accident?” You asked and the PI gave an awkward sort of nod, not knowing what point you were going to try to make. “It wasn’t an accident, he deliberately swerved the car off the road because I’d finally told him that I was leaving him.” Your voice continued to crack, threatening to break. “He pulled himself out of the car and left me there to die. I had to crawl through fire and broken glass to save myself,” you rolled up your sleeve, letting him see the scars, along with the sickening S that Scott had carved into your skin. “That’s why he wants to know where I am. He wants to finish the job.”
The PI let out a slow exhale and it was more than obvious from the way he shifted in his seat that he hadn’t been expecting that story, that he’d been lied to and used by Scott.
A trembling hand wiped at your eye, you were determined not to cry despite everything you’d just been forced to reveal.
“Look, I feel for you, but this is a big payday and -”
You reached into your purse and quickly placed the envelope on the table between you.
“That’s everything I have,” you told him, sniffing back tears, “you can have it all, just - please, give me the file and don’t tell him I’m here. I just want to be able to live my life. I don’t want to have to start over again.”
“You’d leave that rich boyfriend of yours?” He asked, like he almost didn’t believe what you were trying to tell him.
“If I had to. But I don’t want to. Scott has already stolen years of my life, please don’t help him take more. There’s just over fifteen grand in that envelope, I know it’s not a lot but -”
Your heart threatened to stop as he picked up the envelope and started thumbing through the stack of notes inside.
“This is everything you’ve got,” he stated with the certainty of someone who’d looked into your accounts. “You’re willing to give up everything just to make sure this guy doesn’t find you?”
“Yes...”
The moment that followed seemed to linger for an eternity; him looking at you like he was trying to decide what to do, while you stared back, silently praying to any god that might listen to you. 
There was no holding back the relieved sob that slipped from you when he finally put the envelope in his pocket and slid the file across the table to you.
“I’ll tell him I lost track of you after the six months you spent in Chicago.”
“Thank you.
He gave something of a grumble as he started to pull his coat on and got to his feet, ready to walk away, but something made him stop. “Y’know, that boyfriend of yours isn’t as squeaky clean as you think. I’d be careful if I were you - and, maybe, you should ask him where his mother is.”
He didn’t give you the chance to ask what he meant, before he turned and left the diner, your gaze following him out the door and onto the street, watching as walked right past Frank Castle, who was holding his phone and photographing the entire exchange. 
Chapter Nineteen
END NOTES : Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ok so this is probably the chapter than I've been most nervous about so I hope people enjoy the drama and angst! I know this probably wasn't what people were expecting from this chapter, but I won't say too much because I don't want to spoil anything for future chapters.
As always thanks so much for reading and sticking with this, it really does mean the world to me!
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