#the bangs change with every shot lmao

[falling-skyzz]

had some free time during art class and took the chance to steal my friends ipad. again

i dont rly talk abt jrwi here but yeah i love fish man !!!!! he is everything to me

[from-izzy]

every day is a lovely day... | tbz lee juyeon

pairing » the boyz lee juyeon x gn!reader (lmk if i missed anything)

trope/au » strangers to lovers, non-idol au!, university au!

genre »​ mostly hurt/comfort(...?), mostly fluff, a pinch of angst (i always say this but i'm kinda confident in this statement this time lmao), deep reflection on life and aspects of the earth, juyeon who basically falls in love with you at first sight, juyeon being kinda confident towards reader, picnic date by the beach after finishing you last exam!, comforting boyfriend chef (not actually his occupation) lee juyeon!

word count, estimated reading time » 2249, ~8 mins

warnings (lmk if i missed anything!) » reader didn't sleep well, reader uses caffeine to battle tiredness, the slightest of academic difficulties (it's just a dash imo), deep thoughts of sea and sky life (not an expert in this field at all), mentions of open water/vast landscapes in the thoughts

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 part of 'especially to you...'

i swear that banner changes colour before my very eyes. because i do understand that it's bright and at first glance, you can barely see the water on the bottom right. but when i change tumblr to a lighter mode, stare at fading wind lines near the top of the image for some time, my eyes adjust and the water becomes very obvious. i think it depends on colour context because on dark mode, it's hard for the 'effects' to kick in. is it just me...? it's messing with me...there has got to be a study about this somewhere...😭 anyway!

(i accidentally released this earlier so for those who saw anything: no you didn't!! 😭)

happy birthday to you @littleroaes !! ngl i was gonna give up on this birthday present but then i was scrolling through and found this little wip and tried to modify it to what you like. i was gonna do f2l like you mentioned you like but my brain stopped making ideas for that as soon as i told myself to write about it 😭 so here's my very first short story on strangers to lovers that thankfully you have appreciation for 🫶 from your profile, i read you like fishes, the colour blue, kimbap, spring rolls and of course, lee juyeon!! 😸 so i tried my best to incorporate these prompts here. i tried something different for the fishes 🐟 topic but i hope this incorporation is fine 💙

here is your boyfriend that will get you through uni! hope you have the happiest birthday!! 🎂🎉 love you!! mwah!!

Everything changed for you when Juyeon walked into your life.

No, literally.

Well, maybe not…literally.

You remember the prominent eyebags you’ve carried for the last month since university started. The new semester has weighed you heavier than the headache that is arising from the lack of sleep and the missed attempt to get your daily caffeine content since you slept through your alarm. At the very least, you’re thankful that everything is now electronic because you are so unprepared to be commuting to campus with a heavy mind, heart, eyelids and straps on your shoulders that would surely give you a very sore back.

That day started horrendously. You really thought that the alarm was the only thing that the universe threw at you for their entertainment but it was the embarrassing fact that you dozed off during class. Your elbows were propped up too comfortably against the desk and the perfect temperature of the lecture room didn't make it any easier for your natural melatonin to kick in. The next thing you knew, your palms cupped your cheek and there was this loud bang that was accompanied by the sharp pain on your cheekbone when you hit the wooden desk.

Everything is going awesome and you just attracted around a hundred students back to you. Thankfully your lecturer didn't take it to offense and shot you an emphatic smile.

You guessed then after that the universe felt bad for the negative attention that you got and they canceled the next class on your filled weekly schedule. Usually, you would be annoyed at the sudden change but this gave you a little hour to bask in the sun, the open green space and your favourite cup of beverage wrapped protectively by your hands.

Only to find out that you left your wallet at home.

“I’m sorry,” you said to the worker who tried her best to reassure you and to take your time as your frantic fingers ran through the items in your bag.

Your knees fell to the ground and sweat started to creep against your forehead and to the side of your head, a silent reminder to be mindful of the long line of students who are mostly probably just as stressed as you are in their university journey. The lighting above you helped with your sight in your receipt-filled bag but suddenly, the long papers with their minuscule printings became hard to read and a deep voice stated his order.

At first, your instinct was to defend yourself, tell the person who cut in line and added an order between you and your caffeine to wait a little bit longer but his choice of words registered into you before you could voice out anytime.

“I'll add an iced Americano with the order, please.” And then the familiar beeping sound of a successful transaction rings.

Your neck cranes up towards the stranger that only made your day easier and you couldn't help but let out a gentle gasp. A sharp pair of eyes yet soft and curious like a cat, his perfectly shaped nose and the slight upturn of the corner of his lips with the smile that beams down on you. 

The chain necklace around his neck dangles above you and you were sure it hypnotised you to say, “It's an angel.” These were your first words to Lee Juyeon.

“Ah,” the recipient of the compliment could only blush first at your words, a hand sneaking up to mindlessly scratch his nape. “We should at least get out of the line.” 

Now it's your turn to have your cheeks heat up at the realisation that you're blocking everyone else’s caffeine intake.

You thought that maybe Juyeon would just walk away and wait for you to join him on the other side of the table with the hanging ‘Pick up orders here' sign hanging from the beige ceiling. Yet, he crouched and helped you sort out your materials, collecting your pencil case and books into one arm, the other swiftly scooping up the straps of your bag along his other forearm.

Your eyes couldn't help but widen at your empty hands, and you were flustered at how he was still holding onto your things even when the customer who stood behind him joined you both after paying. Juyeon’s bangs shook when he refused to give your things back, insisting that you should be the one to carry the coffee instead. 

“Coffee is important.” He convinces you with that warm smile of his. “Don't drop it!”

With the promise to pay him back for another cup, came a few promises to help with common subjects and overlapping knowledge. And with time, came the fluttering feeling in both your hearts that only grew when you comforted each other in the long nights leading to assignments and exam periods that came all too quickly but passed by excruciatingly slow.

Juyeon made it all worth it though. You walked out of the last two-hour prison of the semester to be greeted with your usual reward packed in a paper bag. If it was anyone else but Juyeon, the contents of the bag would be mushed as you hug it close to you but it's the person that you have missed so much that gets your love first.

“You called me last night, bubs,” Hearing his voice not through the help of technology is more refreshing and you couldn't help but tighten your hold around his figure. 

“Every day is missing Juyeon day.” 

“Well for me, every day is a happy day when you're in my life.”

It's a line that he has said to you many times even before he started dating you. Juyeon tried to make the line more interesting each time but one day, mixed with his tiredness and excitedness of finally seeing you, it became the line that revealed his adoration for you.

Hand in hand, Juyeon's thumb caressing the back of your palm, your right arm closely stuck to his left, you both sway and skip to the nearby beach to relish in each other’s company with nature. The light salty breeze scent hits you before you can even see the gigantic natural blue space that seems endless and seamless with the blue sky. As your outfit becomes one with the direction of the wind and the sun is still bright enough for you to know even when your orbs are hidden beneath your eyelids. It’s the little moments like these that the Earth seems to be so rich in beauty and life becomes beautiful although you’ve been studying endlessly for the past three months. 

You couldn’t help but let your mind wander to the body of water that eventually begins to seep into your view as you walk up the small hill. You imagine the school of fish including the friendly dolphins to the misunderstood sharks and all the shapes and sizes of the life forms in there, some dependent on their family whilst some choosing to live alone. 

That’s why you’ve always been so enamoured by the living, along with the sea plants that they harmoniously live with. 

You wonder what kind of thoughts these creatures have as they live in a world much bigger than the land you stand on and if they ever want to explore the whole ocean like most people would love to see the landmarks scattered across the world. If they visit the landmarks of the ocean, would they even remember it? Or would they just swim away, finding it more than satisfactory with the fact that they’re free, especially those who swish through the water with company?

Same with life in the sky, do they ever get tired from flying? Like some people who are scared of a large body of water but are already mid-journey, how do they persevere in their flight and keep going? Do they sometimes look at human transportation and hope that they could bask in that luxury as well? Sleep in the moving vehicle and relax your tense muscles against the cushioned interiors even if it’s just for ten minutes. You want to know the answer to that and maybe, you’ll be able to learn something from the other life form.

You wish sometimes you would be one of them but it’s hard to say so as well because all forms of life experience different hardships and it’s impossible to generalise anything, nor is it truly fair to say one has it better than the other.

That’s when life becomes so complex and beautiful. The fact that you’re so small in the context of the horizon that stretched too far for you to see and comprehend, leaves you appreciating the small things in life.

For you, the arms encircling your middle remind you that no matter what hardships you face, you’ll be able to safely fall back onto someone. That you can freely cry without judgement and that life is lovely whenever he’s in it. Juyeon steals a kiss from your lips before placing another one on your cheek. Your eyelashes flutter open and you swear that Juyeon’s smile is brighter than the sun that smiles down on you both and louder than the crashing waves against the eroding rocks.

And whenever he asks you, “Feeling better?” You know that Lee Juyeon is the one person that you can answer the question truthfully and genuinely.

You both settled with a picnic blanket underneath a substantial amount of coverage from the sun by the park near the beach, the crashing ocean waves still in sight. You observe the tree above you dancing freely in the winds while the birds seem to sing for both of your accomplishments. 

When you look back down by the cue of a single, proud hand clap, you're greeted with numerous small glass containers clinking next to each other. The colours from the neatly presented food only lifted your energy further and your boyfriend’s orbs glimmered more with the help of the sun that still peaks through from the leaves above.

Juyeon complied when you asked him for a bite of his homemade kimbap and spring rolls. The flavours instantly make you nod. “I refuse to believe that your mum didn't make this.” 

Your boyfriend’s smile flattened, dipping further into a frown, “She helped but I did all the cooking and rolling!” 

“Okay, you cute clingy baby.” Leaning in to press a quick kiss against his pouting lips. “I’m just joking around with you.” 

To Juyeon, the peck is way more than just unsatisfactory and his thoughts about it are clearly reflected first from his eyes. Then, his hand landed next to the food box on his far left and made a sweeping motion on the cotton blanket to the right, pushing all of the obstacles between you and him. His knees slide his body closer to you that was once on the other side, and now with your boyfriend only looking at you with the softest, loving gaze between his overgrown bangs, you couldn’t help but purse your lips momentarily. You couldn’t let out a question or comment but that changed in the blink of an eye when leaned in Juyeon, replacing your growing confusion with a muffled chuckle instead.

A soft groan vibrates to your lips, Juyeon complaining about how there was nothing to laugh about—not when his soft lips are between yours. A palm made its way around the back of your neck, pulling your still extensive smile against his more serious ones. Eventually, with the way that Juyeon poured his love into you, you’re determined to do the same to the only person who would only let you claim his lips. A part of his blue and white sweater is now captured in your fist but it did nothing to your heartbeat which starts to pick up whenever Juyeon pulls away to adjust his lip’s position on yours. 

The subtle nose nudges only served your fingers to trail up his arm that held you close, tracing along the vein that started near his elbows and ran his wrist near your pulse on the side of your neck. Now, with the way that your thumb brushes softly on his soft skin, Juyeon could melt further into you, leaning in further to deepen his presence to you. Whenever he pulled back, you would be the one chasing after him pulling on his sweater, wanting to indulge in his loving space even more.

“Who’s the clingy one now?” That lands him a shy hit to his chest that only made him let out a weightless chuckle in the air. “The love of my life and the only one for me,” he whispers sweet nothings as your foreheads kiss each other, a sweet gaze grazing upon your facial features. “I love you, bubs.”

So maybe you weren't hypnotised at all that day. Maybe, the universe didn't hate you after all. Maybe, this was all meant to happen even though you did go through some stress when the sequential events happened.

“I love you more.”

But at least, the universe gave you a free coffee.

Two, you really did meet an angel named Lee Juyeon.

And three, just like how he holds the day when you confess to him that you love him back, you repeat the words that he said to you at the start of all your lovely days, “Every day is a lovely day when you're in my life.”

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 'especially to you...'

tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here or removed!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️ @kflixnet 📺🍿 @sanaxo-o

[wehangout]

So, the amazing Calli @callivich came up with this beautiful idea for DVD commentary, fic style, and the amazing questions that go with it. As suggested, I'll be indulging myself while talking about:

Thicker Than Forget. Summary: He blinks at you. “What was your first name?” “Erato.” “Erato,” he repeats. “No need to roll the r.” “Like the muse?” You grin. “Poet, meet muse."

AU. Ian is a poet. Mickey is his recently-corporal muse. They eat an absurd amount of stupidly named ice cream, try to find beauty in things, and fall hopelessly in love.

This was fun! Let me know if you want commentary on any other fics!

Give us some stats - (when you wrote it, word count, how long it took to finish, is it a one-shot/multi-chapter, etc)

So, I wrote this for the Shameless Big Bang in 2021. I couldn’t tell you how long it took me to write (Word is giving me conflicting info), but it was probably my easiest write to date. Word count sits at 30-ish thousand words.

What was the initial inspiration for your story?

It was initially inspired by a novel. I don’t remember which one, but it was either Lament or Ballad by Maggie Stiefvater. The only similarity between that one and mine is that a character falls in love with their muse. The plot itself is very different.

If the story is written from a character’s POV, why did you choose this character?

Mickey. Because it’s almost always Mickey lmao. I did try from Ian’s, but this had to be from the muse’s POV and Mickey had to be the muse.

What was your favourite scene to write?

The smut 👀 if you’ve read it, I hope you understand why lmao

How did you come up with the title?

From the poem, Love is Thicker Than Forget! It fits so well with Ian being a poet and the overall theme of the story.

Are there any little moments or references you hope readers will notice?

I went a little meta on fanfic, fandom, and shipping in this, which was so fun. I think only one person seemed to really notice and mention it, though, haha.

Was there anything you struggled to write? If so, how did you overcome this?

I didn’t struggle to write it, but figuring out how to end it was tough. It took a long time for me to figure that out. When I originally came up with the idea it was for an original story, and did not have a happy ending.

Favourite line in the story?

I’m gonna go with lines, plural, because I have a couple

He kisses you and he kisses you and oh. Oh. This is what they were writing about. All the poets, every word of creativity they took from you … it’s this.

He closes his eyes and continues to sigh sonnets into your skin

Also, the last two lines of dialogue, and, I mean, “Fuck the connection” has to be right up there.

What are you most proud about in the story? (plot, characterisation, dialogue, twist/cliffhanger, etc)

The writing, actually. I’m not a poetic person, none of the poems in the fic are mine, but I’m pretty proud of the poetic nature of the writing.

Are there any ‘behind the scenes’ info you’d like to share - e.g. what’s going on in a characters head in a certain scene or how you came to write a certain line?

So, this is the fic that made me realise I needed to stop taking things so seriously lmao. @captainjowl can attest to the research I tend to do. In this case, every ice cream name was a legit flavour at the time, taken from a Baskin-Robbins website. The mural exists. The flowers and trees in the botanic gardens are flowers and trees found in that exact botanic garden. The hoodie! Taken straight from the Brooklyn Zoo website. The pasta they eat at the North Pond – I used Google Maps to make sure there was an Italian restaurant nearby and looked up ponds in Lincoln Park.

I've since tried to be more chill. Sometimes I fail.

Reading back the story now, is there anything you’d change or add?

I’d make it longer, if possible.

Would you ever write a sequel to this story?

It’s a nice idea, because I’d love to write something pretty again, but I have zero inspiration for it.

Are there any ‘easter eggs’ in your story - e.g. references to other stories you’ve written, a trope you often use etc?

Uh, if you’ve read this and Suncatcher you might notice that I, like Ian and Sandy, have a thing for The Doors.

If you’ve chosen your most popular story, are you surprised by the popularity?

I don’t know if this is my most popular story, but I was definitely surprised by the intensity of the comments I received. It was one time when I knew I’d written something good, but the way it made other people feel definitely took me by surprise.

Anything else you’d like the readers to know about the story?

I love that this was loved. I still go back and read it every now and then and just sigh.

[bludpudding]

whts ur opinion on sila duriyanga im halfway between “gnc icon” and “it should have been me”

alright. man. fuckin. listen

i have some CHOICE WORDS about the dreaming series but THOSE CHAPTERS ESPECIALLY. WHAT THE FUCK IS AN ALEX CORINTH

Sila himself is all fine and dandy. not enough about them is revealed for me to have a concrete “this person’s great!” or “this person sucks ass!” stance (although with how the dreaming handles trans/gnc characters it probably wouldn’t be good. if you ask me Sila needs to go back in time and book a flight to get the hell out of the sandman universe for his own peace of mind. didn’t deserve any of that shit).

my issue is with the book itself. it’s the fact that they made corinthian human. that whole arc is a fucking disaster and it is very blatant to me that the writers didn’t really understand the characters they were working with. alex corinth is the bane of my existence and I am sending a shitmissile to his location as we speak.

what angers me the most is how the dreaming managed to produce such an intricate and BEAUTIFUL masterpiece like Souvenirs that explores Cori’s trauma and self-loathing and his experience with trying to find his place in the world only for it all to be completely thrown away. they knock him on the head, make him transphobic, put him in some tight pants and send him off to be human. making him human doesn’t help in telling his story. if anything, it just reiterates the fact that he’s this unlovable monster that can only be accepted if he’s completely and fundamentally changed. which is just. SO NOT TRUE MAN CMON IM BANGING MY HEAD ON THE TABLE HE IS A BEAUTIFUL CREATURE THAT REPRESENTS SO MUCH AND IS PERFECTLY CRAFTED AND THEY JUST THREW IT AWAY FOR WHAT? TO GIVE HIM WEEZER BLUE EYES?? EAT MY ASS. BOTH CHEEKS.

i get what they were trying to do but they missed it by a fucking long shot and now this alex corinth guy haunts my every waking thought

sila’s chill though. if that’s what you were asking.

(I’m open to discussion on this because I haven’t seen anyone hate alex corinth as bad as I do LMAO. tell me your thoughts.)

[onewmin]

the perfume on the shelf. pt. 2 | bangchan

Pairing: Bang Chan x Fem!reader

Summary: Falling in love with your best friend was never a part of the plan. So you end it up. But does he want to put a stop to it, too?

Warnings: AU, mentions of cheating, profanity, Chan being completely oblivious, a cliffhanger in the end

Author’s note: this is Chan’s POV; the change from “she” to “you” seems very poetic to me as the story progresses lmao. There are a lot of flashbacks, they are highlighted so that you don’t get lost. hope you enjoy! Tell me what you think!

Disclaimer: the names and appearances of real people are used for inspiration and writing purposes only. I do not claim anything, everything belongs to its owners.

Part 1 | Part 3

The first time Chan ever saw your face was at a book fair six years ago.

He attended with his friends and girlfriend at the time; she was keen on adult novels so much, that she could never miss the opportunity to buy and read something new.

You were exactly were the girlfriend wanted you: at the “18+ novels” stand. Telling people about books, suggesting different stories to buy, and laughing at even improper jokes some customers were making.

His ex-girlfriend got an invisible hold on you, becoming the customer who seized your attention for the next twenty minutes. Every book was described in such details, that even Chris got involved and bought one. Not that he ever read it, though — he was more a fan of detective stories.

But his girlfriend? Bought a copy of each book. She spent so much money at the fair, and had to ask her parents send a little bit just so she wouldn’t die of starvation. Yeah, being a student was his favourite time, surely.

The book fairs at the campus happened every six months, so in a half year he was there again, that time volunteering at the children’s section. Only then he found out fifty percent of story collections and books were written by the students themselves. He didn’t see you at the fair that time, but he definitely saw an opportunity.

Three days later he was at the writers’ club gathering, having collected all his poems in a green binder. Chan was never socially anxious, making friends and new acquaintances anywhere he went, but that time was different. He felt out of place, thinking everyone was (or at least, looked like) really smart and he? He never felt that way. His, by that moment already ex, girlfriend had always been making fun of him for almost failing his maths classes. She used to say, “If someone is failing maths, they’re not good at anything”. Weird shot, but okay. It’s not like he was a genius, he reminded her and himself, and maths was pretty hard, too.

Was Chan’s not being a maths genius the main reason she cheated on him? Who knows, she blocked him right after he found out about her affair. Good for him. Good.

The breakup rediscovered his long-forgotten talent — writing poems. He had so much of them he didn’t know what to do. Before the writers’ club. Maybe here he’d find a way to show his true self to the world.

As he sat down in the corner of the room, at the back of the hall, he noticed just how many people were apart of the club. And they were all friends, too. “I’m not here to make friends”, Chan shook his head, “I’m here to get published”.

Suddenly the seat near him was taken. A girl with a pink binder, who, as Chan noticed only by a quick look at her face, was displeased with something. Maybe her book or story idea got rejected?

“Hey”, Chan started, slightly turning his torso in the girl’s direction, “d’you know how to get published?”

The girl’s eyebrows raised, eyes darted to him. “Shit, what did I even do?”, the wave of panic rose from his feet right to his head the moment he saw the look in her eyes. Dark, full of anger.

“You came here just to get published?”, despite the way she presented herself, her voice sounded pretty nice. “You have to get through professor Martins first”.

“Literature professor, yeah?”

She nodded. For some reason, Chris found her features… mesmerizing? No, that was too much for a person he’d just met. “He put me through nine circles of hell before even considering publishing. Change this, rewrite that, the characters are too unrealistic — yeah, like, he would know, how real teenagers communicate”, she wanted to say something else, but quickly covered her mouth with her palm. “Anyways, he knows if your work is worth it”.

“Did you get published?”

“Yup. I literally had to die and come back to life for this to happen”.

Chris raised an eyebrow. “Literally?”

“Literally, dude. Everyone here has done it, at least once”.

Later that night he carried two binders in his hands — the girl was kind enough to share her works with him. Professor Martins absolutely destroyed Chan’s poems (and will to live as well), stating,

“They lack in grammar. It’s too simple”.

And it was the nicest thing he said. Chan had never, even years after graduating, felt another sudden urge to weep in his car like it was that evening.

“Is he always like this?” he asked the girl, back at his seat.

“Did he brutally murder your dream of becoming a writer?”

Chris nodded, letting out a shaky sigh. The girl’s lips curved into a soft smile, and she patted his shoulder, a sympathetic look in her eyes. “Yeah, I know. You’ll ignore the next few meetings, but will come back, eventually. Martins’ like that horrible ex you keep coming back to, y’know?”

Such a pretty smile. It was somehow similar to his, Chan admitted, while staring at the ceiling of his dorm room: dimples on full display, and her left one deeper than the other, mirroring his prominent right dimple. Chan didn’t realize that a smile, so similar to his, would be as magnificent as it was.

And he’s been thinking about it since then. Only for her dimples to be shown more rarely the further the time went on; he hadn’t seen mush of them recently. Just her regular, half-smile to whatever jokes he was telling — even her favourite ones didn’t do the trick.

“A man walks into his home to find out all his lamps were stolen. D’you know what happened to him?”

“What?” If he had paid more attention, he would have noticed the flatness in her voice, the shaky breaths and head pressed into the pillow.

“He was delighted”, Chris giggled, expecting the same reaction from her. Dad jokes were her thing, something she snorted to whenever the chance was given. But then it was nothing. Just her humming to him in response.

“Goodnight, Chan”.

He didn’t say anything. She had told him previously she had some problems at work, so he assumed it was the reason for her putting distance between them.

“You should get more sleep, tiger”, Chan put the strand of hair behind her ear, his hand staying on her cheek, gently caressing her under eye by his thumb. She leaned into the touch, but he didn’t notice. He never did.

“I hate that nickname”, she mumbled.

“I also hate being called “shawty”, but it never stops you”, the corners of her mouth quirked up, her lips uttering yet another nonsense.

“It’s ‘cause you’re short”. The first time she said that Chan’s jaw dropped in disbelief. Six years later it was just a regular thing to hear from her. Being 4 centimeters taller than him, as she firmly believed, gave her a right to point out their height difference on every occasion.

“And you still have that ridiculous tiger costume”.

“Like it’s a crime”. She huffed and left his soft embrace, marching into the kitchen. “We all make mistakes when we’re young, you know that, right?”

“Mistakes don’t get engraved into a memory of twenty people. People trying to striptease in a tiger costume do”.

A flush creeped across her cheeks, and Chan couldn’t help but smile. Making her embarrassed about something was his ultimate favourite thing. She cleared her throat, trying to reply, but instead Chris only heard the buzzing. Shutting and opening his eyes twice to check if it was real, and the sound only intensified.

The reality hit him immediately. Jumping on his bed, taking the phone from the nightstand — failing miserably, as it slipped from his hands and fell on the floor — “Shit, shit, shit”, picking it up in panic (the screen wasn’t damaged) and sliding across to answer the call.

“Chan, we need you at the studio. See you in an hour”. Lee Know ended the call before Chris could even open his mouth. Great. Another day off ruined.

Chan laid back in the bed, his head hitting the headboard. “Ugh, shit”, he winced, rubbing the back of the head. What’s next? He’s going to get up and break his leg?

His idea to scroll through the news was interrupted by a text. From her, three hours ago. Did he forget something at her place?

“I’m tired of this bullshit. We r not a thing anymore”.

“Oh and yeah. What’s this between us? This bullshit? It’s no friendship. We stopped being friends the moment you decided to fuck me. You know I have feelings for you, all these months you knew. And you didn’t give a fuck about it. So why should I? So yeah, that’s it. Leave the spare keys under the rug. Never call me. Because whenever I hear your voice or see you face… Whenever you’re around, I just feel more alone. Bye, Chan”.

And he jumped from the bed.

“Hey, your button”, Chan took her pants in his hands and observed the troubled area carefully.

“Yeah, it’s barely holding. Every time I sit, I think it’s gon’ fall”.

“Why haven’t you fixed it?”

“Argh”, she scratched the back of her head, looking everywhere but at him. “Don’t have the time”.

“Bring me the needle and a thread”, he sat down on the bed. She went though all stages of something that time: scratched her ear, rubbed her rosy-colored cheeks, sighed and moved onto rubbing her neck.

“You don’t have to…”

“Now”.

“Okay, boss”, she mumbled, almost flying from the room.

“I can do it myself, y’know”, she was observing him sewing the button too carefully. Her standing right in front of him — overshadowing the light — didn’t help at all.

“Sit down, Bob the Builder”.

She complied, but with a heavy sigh and a violent plop on the bed, which made Chris jump involuntarily; if he hadn’t been holding her pants and the needle as tightly as possible, it all would have been on the floor.

“Every time you say ‘I can do it myself’, you end up breaking something. The nail, the shelf, the hand”. She groaned in response. “Stop bouncing your leg, it’s distracting”.

“Jeez! Stop bossing me around, Miranda Priestly”.

“I thought you like it when I tell you what to do”. He was too concentrated on fixing her button to see, but he knew. Her ears turned red as she covered her face, and then — bam! — smacked his shoulder. The regular routine of embarrassment.

“Ouch”, a little blood spot on his finger — the needle went into his skin right through the fabric of the pants.

“Oh shit”, she almost fell down from the bed, but ran to the kitchen to get her fist-aid bag. Chan smirked; it wasn’t like he’d been in pain — worst things happened to him during dance practices — but to watch her nervously going through the bag, to see her look for everything she needed.

And there she was. Sitting on her knees in front of Chan, applying something on his tiny wound. A pinched expression on her face — as if it was his fault — and her touch, half aggressive, half gentle. And in this last half, Chan swore on everything he had, in this half of tenderness he could drown, voluntarily jump from the cliff just to lose himself in the soft silk of her feelings. It was always so difficult to read her emotions, no matter how hard he tried or what he said — it seemed impossible.

She never said anything either. The fact, that Chan caught her crying in his bed, startled him so much he couldn’t even bring it up. Sometimes he was convinced she wasn’t able to feel anything except for positive emotions; and what’s worse, even the good ones were expressed rarely. In the six years he’d known her, he kept asking himself, when did she ever speak about her feelings?

Something about her dad’s emotional unavailability becoming her trait, too, as she blurted out once. And that was it — no other explanation. She spoke in actions, Chris knew that too well; however, hearing something about her feelings, at least once, would be a great idea. But she never did. And whenever he got in trouble, she scolded him, drove her car, sighing annoyingly too often, and then treated his bruises and scratches on the couch; or let him fix his broken heart by crying in her embrace. Her words were awkward (to her), but to Chan, hearing her utter under her breath, “I’m here with you, and for you, and… And I’m just here. I’ll always be”, was the only thing he needed.

“But when she showed her feelings, when she cried into your pillow, with your hand on her waist — were you there? Did you tell her that?”

“That’s it”, she put a bandaid with small pictures of Iron Man on his fingertip and blew on the covered wound. “Shouldn’t hurt you anymore”.

“It didn’t”, Chan cleared his throat for some reason. And when she got up from the floor and sat down next to him on the bed, his throat was dry again.

She looked at him — so… Lovingly? He couldn’t quite read the glance; not because of the usual reasons, but ‘cause it was the first time he noticed it. He didn’t quite know what to do. Bang Chan, the chief manager in the Affection Department, what would he do?

The palm of his hand slowly landed on her cheek, moving her face closer to his. His nose brushed hers in a swift touch, lips leaving a peck on her forehead. If she was saying something, the sound of the heartbeat, drumming in his chest, deafened Chan completely.

Chan touched her forehead with his, eyes locked on her eyes, dazzling in the dim light of the bedroom. Were they always this peerless? Or was he just blind his entire life, his blurry vision cured by her shining?

“Thank you”, he whispered, still focused on her eyes and unsteady breathing.

“You palm is sweaty”, she mumbled under her breath, and he chuckled, expecting to hear this kind of nonsense from her.

Staring into the wall in front of him, Chan wiped a tear from his cheek.

“I have feelings for you”. And you’re saying it through a text? A fucking breakup text?

Maybe, just maybe, consider asking about his feelings too, huh?

Yeah, and what would he say?

Chan didn’t quite know. He couldn’t wrap his head around the strange tingling in his chest whenever you were near, whenever you were laughing at his lame jokes, whenever you played with his hair. Whenever you did fucking anything. He ignored the feeling, putting it into a cage deep inside of his heart. You were his best friend, after all, a person he confided in. Wouldn’t it be wrong to fall in love with you?

“Whenever you’re around, I just feel more alone”.

That’s the reason for crying? That was it this entire time? Did he really make you feel this way?

Too many thoughts were spinning in his head, and he wasn’t able to catch at least one by the tail — they were slipping away, only to circle around your name and face, and hands, and smile, and fingers intertwined with his, and cold feet attacking his warm ones under the covers, and… Only you.

To never call you? To stop seeing you? Did you really think he would listen to your commands?

Throwing whatever clothes he found on the floor, putting on mismatched socks and sneakers, he ran down the stairs, calling Lee Know simultaneously.

“You’re on your way, I hope”.

“Answer one question”.

“What’s with the voice? Are you jogging or something?”

“D’you think I’m in love with her?”

‘Her’? Minho knew right away. “You dumb fuck. Took you long enough”.

“It’s that obvious?”

Minho rubbed his eyes with extra annoyance at that moment. “If I see you two staring at each other and then denying it one more time, I swear to god, I will kill you both. Romeo and Juliet style. Shut up and come to the studio already”.

“I’m gon’ be late”. Chan knew exactly what Minho’s next words were — not that he was willing to listen to them.

Shit, he panted on the street, the car keys were on the kitchen table. Running back would be too long, Chan thought, so the taxi he jumped in should be perfect.

The windows were open, wind blowing in his face — and even the air outside was filled with your scent. Floral perfume, that always reminded him of late spring nights spent with you.

“You don’t mind if I change the route?”, the driver asked. “To overtake the traffic?”

“Yeah, no problem”.

Five minutes later they were on the empty highway, going round the city to get to the neighborhood you were living in. Chan ignored the driver’s occasional texting — not his first rodeo with such people. It’d be better if he didn’t, though.

The next thing Chan remembered was his head hitting the back of the passenger seat.

Taglist:

@heylookwhoitis

[misunhye]

MY FIRST AND LAST

LINES

MY FIRST AND LAST

책에 적힌 글자들이 현실이 돼

가슴이 곧 터져 버릴 것 같아 [ 0:39 — 0:46 ]

Let me talk about love [ 1:14 ]

Yeah I’m talking to you [ 1:16 ]

알딸딸한 게 뭔지 난 아직 모르지만

너에게 취한 것 같아 [ 1:50 — 1:56 ]

(HAECHAN/MISUN] 넌 나의 나의 마지막 [ 3:04 — 3:05 ]

(HAECHAN/MISUN] 넌 나의 나의 마지막 [ 3:14 — 3:15 ]

DUNK SHOT

덩크슛 한 번 할 수 있다면

내 평생 단 한 번만이라도 [ 0:59 — 1:07 ]

덩크슛 한 번 할 수 있다면

내 평생 단 한 번만이라도

얼마나 짜릿한 [ 2:07 — 2:18 ]

It’s a dunk shot [ 2:42 ]

덩크슛 한 번 할 수 있다면

내 평생 단 한 번만이라도

얼마나 짜릿한 그 기분을 느낄까 [ 2:59 — 3:18 ]

LOOKBOOK

PHOTOCARD

Misun

thank you for the support. I appreciate all of you.

HIGHLIGHTS

oh GOD

this was the WORST era for rory

actually second worst right after we go up but we'll get into that later

she absolutely hated it for one reason:

jaemin wasn't there

she was absolutely heartbroken when they told the group he had to go on hiatus for his herniated disc

they obviously didnt show it on camera but her and jaemin were very close

he would always cheer her up

she was just not feeling this era

she talked probably even less than chewing gum

at least in chewing gum, jaemin would encourage her to speak up

the other members tried too, but it was always him who made her feel best

she’d catch herself playing with the boys and being happy and then she remembers and gets sad

she feels bad that shes enjoying herself when jaemin cant be there

she’s down for most of this era :( jaemin had to end up talking to her to reassure her (and himself) that he would come back and they’d be eight again

okay anyways .. besides the hurt and empty feeling she felt all this time

she grew an inch so she was happy abt that

her hair was still dirty blonde, not much change but she had forehead bangs this time

umm 2 fansites opened up for her this era! 'B' and 'SUGAR CREAM' !!

once again, red velvet and nct dream's promotions clashed again!!

when rookie won, joy gave a huge kiss on rory's cheeks and rory blushing was all over twitter

once again the fucking SKIRTS

this was especially bad because they had to get on the floor multiple times during the choreo

thank god for her safety shorts

actually most of the time though, luckily, she was in the back of the choreo

even though she was literally .. one of the main dancers but anyway still grateful since she mostly wore skirts during this era

also she probably had the most almost wardrobe accidents this era

so many times there was a lot of wind and her skirt would almost blow up but either she'd notice or the other members would and would quickly cover her

that happens almost every era though but like it was bad because all they wore were their fucking uniforms to perform mfal

for ppl who wanted to put her in the back to make her one of the guys and not stand out,, u werent helping with making her wear a skirt

or yknow. the only girl in a group full of boys

okay right

so she still got major hate this era. it didn’t help that her character on the mfal mv was clingy

nothing new with that

intl fans and korean fans alike were angry at the fact that she had to wear a skirt while being on the floor

but sm never changed the choreo so :/

(dw it gets better now she never wears skirts or dresses whenever they have to get on the floor for choreos)

in chewing gum era, she stuck the most to mark and jaemin

however this time, she was closest to mark and jisung

one fav moment from this era is when misun said she thought renjun's snaggletooth was cute and for him to never get it fixed to which he promptly began blushing

yeah she lowkey got cocky after that LMAO

oh during the mv

at the start she was walking with jeno and when he turned to look at the teacher, she was still talking and when she noticed he wasnt paying attention she hit him in the arm

the whole mv is just her being annoyed by the boys not paying attention to her and focusing on the teacher more

during her part w/ mark she follows and tugs on mark's arm for his attention but he doesnt give it to her

when they run for the teacher's mug and almost drop it, she's the one who quickly grabs it from smashing on the floor

the camera pans to her with a disgusted look on her face

either from how the boys were acting or the fact that the teacher left her lipstick mark on it

oh during the car thing .. she's literally just shaking her head in disappointment but helps them anyway

when they get outside and she sees the boys' disappointment to the teacher having a child and husband .. she's literally just sitting there laughing

.. until she sees the husband's face and is in awe

and then the boys make fun of her

and the end

actually her character in the mfal mv makes knetz think she’s even more of a brat and in love with the boys bc of how annoyed she acts

which sucks and she emphasizes in lives that it was just a character

for dunk shot she's pretty much neutral on this song

but she does like that she got to wear either jeans or shorts for performing it :D

when renjun throws the ball and like then haechan is supposed to catch it,,

misun is in the middle and jumps to hit the ball to haechan

her fits for dunk shot, similar to the boys she’s wearing jerseys/sport shirts with actual shorts underneath 😭 sometimes they’d be long jerseys and cover her shorts but she was always wearing shorts

sporty misun >>

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

OC Story: 916

Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Chapter 1 - "Internal Affairs"

After discovering a child inside the cockpit of a Corporate Soldat, David and his mercenaries retreat back to their base and attempt to identify the mysterious pilot....

Genre: Scifi (Mecha) Content Warning: General descriptions of violence, long text jumpscare after you press Keep Reading lmao Word Count: 8.9k

A/N: For the person who said that the story so far reminded them of Iron-Blooded Orphans, you're gonna be reminded of it a LOT more during this chapter. More in depth author's note at the end. Thanks for taking the time to read this if you do, feedback is always appreciated!

David stood by an open doorframe, looking into the empty hallway of abandoned school before he turned his attention to the room he stood outside of. The room was presumably a nurse's office since there were beds inside. Whether or not they were entirely clean was a luxury he couldn't afford since his mercenaries immediately attended to the child they had found.

After the doctors determined that he would at least wake up soon, they departed to the rest of the convoy outside, leaving David and another mercenary attending the child.

David crossed his arm and examined the child sleeping in the bed closely. He didn’t even have a shirt on and the wires connecting from his chest to the spine was emitting some kind of white noise. The numbers on his neck did not inspire any confidence in the idea that he came from anywhere pleasant, let alone the fact he arrived from a secret tunnel inside a damaged Soldat.

Even his head wasn’t completely intact, with part of his hair shaved off and revealing some kind of slot inside, which was a mixture of flesh and metal bits. David tried his best to ignore looking at it, if he did any longer he might throw up.

His eyes glanced over to his second in command, Chloe, who pushed back her red bangs and put her face closer to the child’s neck. Her fair skin contrasted with the paleness of the child’s skin, giving the impression that he had barely seen the sun. Though given the nature of his appearance, that probably was the case.

Even though Chloe was quite short among the other members of Wolf Company, she towered over the child, whereas a normal child would have at least come up to her chest. Which disturbed David all the more.

Just how young was this kid when he was turned into…whatever the hell this was? 

“Well, he gonna be fine, Chloe?” David asked as his massive shoulders shrugged.

Chloe leaned back as she responded to his question.

“He’s lucky to still be breathing right now, Boss. I can’t make heads or tails of what the crap all over him is specifically meant to do, but all I can tell is that it’s keeping him alive.”

“Hmph.” David grunted as he walked outside the room and into a long hallway, staring out the windows directly in front of him.

Through the broken glass, he saw several of the engineers taking a look at the R1-N0 Soldat, which stood in the middle of a courtyard. Several vehicles surrounded it with loads of equipment and scanners, as two of his men in Soldats stood on guard a fair distance away, one blocking a straight shot on the crew and the other to its right. Their left flank was blocked by the building he was in, which formed an L-shape.  

Wolf Company had taken refuge in an abandoned school on the far right border of Cumbria. It was fairly secure, and they had taken up residence for the past four weeks without incident. It was a nice change of pace without rival PMC’s trying to hunt them down for past aggressions. David frowned at that. He had said it was nothing personal every time they came to blows, yet it always ended up with them getting pursued. Shrugging, he decided to let that thought go for the moment.

“What have you grease monkeys got for me so far?”

“Boss, the equipment this kid’s rocking is insane! Thing’s armed with a 60mm autocannon that could punch through all of our Soldats, barring yours. Pretty sure there’s a heat dagger hidden somewhere too, and that's not to mention its armor! The damage looks bad but it's barely even dented!”

David was taken slightly aback as he stole another glance at the blast marks on the R1-N0. The right shoulder was completely blackened, but now that the engineer mentioned it, he did not see any internal damage. There was not even any sparks of electronics or oil splashes.

“Guess that makes sense considering it’s Dyson tech. Speaking of which, how’s the cockpit?”

“The seat has some kind of connecting point for the pilot’s back. We tried to activate it, but it just didn’t budge. We think it’s some kinda safeguard against hijacking, but not positive on that yet.”

As much as David wanted to examine the Soldat himself, this kid was the far more pressing matter. That being said, he did not feel entirely comfortable just leaving it be. There’s no way it would be so defenseless without a pilot, especially since it reeked of corporate funding.

“At least this time it ain’t trying to kill us.” David muttered to himself. 

David had only seen the R1-N0 once, and that was all it took for him to hope he would never be fighting one again.

One year ago, Wolf Company was tasked by a rival corporation to attack a Dyson outpost in Florence territory. What was supposed to be an easy job ended in complete disaster when his team were ambushed by these R1-N0’s. They responded to no hails, and even when his engineers jammed into their communications, there was absolutely nothing being said.

No orders, tactics, or even trash talk. It was an eerie silence, which was impossible considering how well coordinated they were and how they were always attacking together. Even other reports by other PMC's indicated that they attacked the same way, in a group.

That was the one thing he took away from these Soldats, the Dyson R1-N0’s never fought alone, and they fought like demons. Why was this one by itself, and more importantly, why was there a kid in there?

“Boss, kids waking up!” Chloe shouted from across the hallway.

“Speak of the devil. Only took five hours…Coming!”

David walked into the room right as the child opened his eyes. He slowly sat upright and his face remained unchanged upon seeing two ill-dressed strangers staring back, in a room he probably had no idea where the location was. The child's lack of reaction was not entirely surprising to David. He sat there blinking silently at the two of them.

“...You uh, alright there kid?” Chloe asked, crossing her arms. She eyed him up and down, noting his strange behavior.

“Yes.” The child replied promptly, but emotionlessly.

“No…injuries or anything?” David questioned next.

“Mild dizziness, but it will pass.”

David and Chloe exchanged a glance that indicated neither of them knew how to carry out the conversation.

“Is something the matter? You two look unable to speak.” Now it was the child’s turn to interrogate them.

“Something the ma-” Chloe sounded flabbergasted, the face she made David couldn’t tell if she was insulted, confused, or a mixture of both. “Of course we look unable to speak! You got more metal bits coming out of ya then my goddamn cockpit, and here you are, brushing us off as if it’s normal!”

“...Is it not?”

David cleared his throat as he motioned with his hand towards Chloe for her to ease off. She just shrugged and clicked her tongue, stepping back.

“Name’s David, but just call me Boss. That’s Chloe to my left. How about yours, kid?”

“EH-916.”

“...Your name, not your callsign.”

“EH-916.”

“...God almighty, it’s worse than I thought. People just call you the number they branded onto your neck?”

“Yes.”

Somehow, talking with the kid made him feel even more uneasy. The way he responded so matter of factly to his bizarre circumstances. Actually, the fact he was this proper in speaking was another indicator of what terrible things had been done to him.

“Psh, your eyes may look like you have some life, but there’s nothing going on upstairs evidently!” Chloe snarked, an exhale of mild amusement leaving her nose.

“Last I checked, Chloe, only thing going on up in that dome of yours is blowing stuff up,” David retorted. “Least this kid knows when to keep his mouth shut.”

Chloe was appearing like she was about to scream something vulgar in return, but David shut her up by asking 916 another question. This time, he knelt down so he could get on eye level with him.

“Alright, 916. Tell me, what the hell were you doing in a Soldat?”

“That is my designated R1-N0.”

“Your designated…You’re the main pilot of that thing?”

“Yes.”

Chloe stepped forward shaking her head.

“But you’re just a kid! How can you pilot something that-’

“I am an Enhanced Human. My purpose in life was to fulfill my orders given to me by Dyson Headquarters. I am augmented to efficiently pilot the R1-N0 Soldat and work alongside other Enhanced Humans.”

Finally, the pieces started to click in David’s head. This wasn’t just some one-off freak experiment. He could only fathom the scale of it, but the way 916 was speaking-

“There’s…more of you?”

“The others were ordered to find the Florence Government soldiers who attacked our corporate headquarters. My last directive was not to trust any of the employees of Dyson, escape, and live life to the fullest, and not waste it.”

“Boss, that means the skirmish we were told about-”

“Yeah, kid here must’ve come from that.”

David examined 916 once again, realizing how much of him appeared to be augmented, and that was only what he could see. The wires on his chest connected to the protruding, obviously metallic spine, the slot on his head, god knows what else the kid was hiding.

“You don’t seem to care that you’re exposing some pretty serious stuff, 916.”

“I believe those responsible are already being punished by the Florence government, Boss. If you planned to kill me and salvage my R1-N0, I would not be here, so it is obvious you have questions. I am no longer under orders from Dyson. My creator told me I was…free. I am unsure of what it means to be that.”

David chuckled at that. He doubted there was anyone who did know what it truly meant to be free. Even himself and the rest of Wolf Company. Standing back up, he offered a hand to 916. The size of his palm completely dwarfed 916’s, but he offered it gently, waiting for him to take it.

“Tell ya what. How about we show you around? Long as you promise not to kill us inside that thing, anyway.”

“As long as you do not give me a reason to.”

David laughed heartily at the remark, and gladly took 916’s hand and helped him up. He motioned for Chloe to follow, which she gave a slight smirk at the order.

…

The three of them stood in front of the kneeling R1-N0 as the engineers and other crew began murmuring to themselves. The sight of someone so small with so many augmentations amazed and scared them equally. This kid was the pilot of a corporate mech?

One of the engineers looked back and gave a quick salute.

“Boss. Chloe…That kid our pilot?”

“So he claims to be." David responded as his head turned to 916. "Mind powering it up? My boys seem to have trouble doing so.”

916 made an affirming hum. Before anyone could offer a lift or even a stepladder, he began climbing into the cockpit with relative ease. The way he did so looked like he had jumped into a Soldat without the assistance of any kind of leverage many times.

While 916 made motions to activate his Soldat, David stepped closer to the machine. Now that he was able to look at the R1-N0 properly up close, he began making out many details that he wasn’t able to before.

The head’s visor was segmented into four different smaller visors, two on each side of the face. It shone a bright blue as the sun reflected light off it, and the shape of the head itself was angular, with two yellow bits of jagged armor making it seem like it had tusks. The antenna on the Soldat was a massive solid piece of yellow steel jutting upwards, making it look like a horn.

“Guess that’s why other mercs called it the Rhino…” David commented to himself.

Looking at the torso, it also followed the same design philosophy of the head. Angular, segmented by different plates of armor. Though most of the white paint was chipped or outright black and brown thanks to the damage done.

Well, superficial damage anyway. As far as he could tell, any shot that did hit it bounced right off. The massive hatch in the middle opened upwards and revealed the cockpit, where 916 was still activating his Soldat. He was able to see some kind of latching mechanism attach to the spine, which grossed him out. 

Moving onto the arms, it had stopped being angular and more compact, the shoulders and arms resembling a box-like shape. The hands of the R1-N0 contrasted with its more utilitarian design, and appeared to be closer to claws than anything with its sharp fingers extending past its palm.

And…was that a red stain on the right hand?

Deliberately choosing to ignore that, David then looked at the legs. It was the most massive part of the Soldat, the thighs being somehow even larger pieces of armor, making it hard to separate the it from the rest of the leg at a glance.

The knees plates were facing outwards and almost the size of the leg itself, with the feet being massive claws, two toes in front and back.

He did remember these suits being faster than any Soldat he had seen, able to land from jumping extreme heights and having zero issues speeding around with their thrusters, maybe those claws helped stabilize it?

Finally, 916 was finished and everyone saw his eyes flash red, then back to violet, scaring a couple of the engineers and admittedly even David and Chloe too.

The R1-N0 stood properly upright, catching the attention of the other two Soldats. In comparison, the R1-N0 stood a meter taller. It was seven meters, by his guess. The other two were Florence Soldats, who were far less flashy than the R1-N0. Their colors had been adjusted to Wolf Company’s primary color: gray and black accents instead of the Florence dark brown.

Their chest was essentially a massive blocky square, with the cockpit being right above the waist. The legs were blocky, but more proportionate to the rest of the Soldat.  The arms were not too dissimilar from the R1-N0, but the length of them were shorter, going to the top of the thighs, and the hands were far more human in appearance. 

In fact, everything about the Florence Soldat was far more humanoid than the R1-N0, to the point it could be seen as a scaled up human in heavy armor. Even the head appeared friendlier in comparison. It had one uninterrupted red visor, as if it were a soldier’s helmet, with slightly more armor poking out above the visor. The only complaint David really had with them were the names given to this class of Soldat.

“Hm, everything about the Rhino makes these Guardian-types look like child’s play…”

“Boss.” David heard 916 call out to him.

“I am now in the Soldat. Is there anything you wanted me to do?”

The cockpit still remained open, and everyone looked impressed that he had activated it so easily. The head’s blue segmented visors stared straight at David, alongside 916 himself.

“Uh…I guess give us a damage report? It looked pretty bad but we weren’t able to detect internal damage.”

916’s eyes flickered several different colors, shocking the crew again before reading a report out loud on his right monitor.

“Superficial damage. Electric circuits require a minor tune up, as well as calibrations. With the proper tools I can manage it myself.”

“How the hell can you-?”

“The data for maintenance is installed in my head via a processing chip.” 916 replied, as if having a chip inside your brain was the norm.

“Riiiight, how could I overlook something so obvious?” David sarcastically commented. 

“Do not feel bad, it is not obvious. Apparently.”

“Motherf…” David just sighed as Chloe and some of the other mercenaries laughed.

“Guess your age’s getting to ya, eh boss?” The engineer chuckled.

David shot everyone a glance that quickly shut everyone up.

“Crack a joke about my age again, and I’m crackin’ your neck.” David grumbled. He was only thirty-five, that was way too young to start making jokes about that kind of thing. He looked back up to 916. “Alright, I guess next we can-”

Before he could finish his sentence, the guarding Soldats quickly spun around to the left flank, moving behind cover and turning towards the company.

“Boss!” The closest one shouted from within his Soldat, using the machine’s speakers.

“Our radars are picking up something arriving! We think they’re Soldats! Ten minutes out!”

Everyone suddenly turned to David, awaiting their orders.

“The hell? Chloe, get your and Hayes’ asses into your Soldats, get mine too while you’re at it! Everyone pack your shit and get ready to leave, ASAP! And kid!-”

The R1-N0 adjusted itself to fully look at David as the courtyard’s population quickly scattered towards all directions. The two Soldats nodded at each other and one approached the corner of the wall carefully while the other walked closer to David.

“If you want to get out of here, now’s your chance. This is a problem for Wolf Company, not you.”

“Do you not need any assistance?”

“You don’t owe us anything.”

“But you helped me out of the Soldat. You did not need to do that for me either.”

Now David understood the emotion Chloe felt earlier.

“What? Who wouldn’t help a ki-?! Because I-...Know what, I don’t care. Do what you want.”

“Boss! I’m getting hailed by the Soldats!” One of the Guardian-Soldats knelt down to pick up David with its hand, and brought it close to the cockpit.

The pilot’s right monitor picked up an open channel, and the screen turned on to reveal a dark skinned man dressed in a navy blue uniform.

“B-Boss, isn’t that-?!”

“Florence Military Police…?”

The pilot leaned back as David stepped inside the cockpit.

“Am I currently speaking to the leader of Wolf Company?”

“You are. Whom do I owe the displeasure?”

“Captain Alana of the Florence Military Police. I wish to speak to you regarding someone currently in your vicinity.”

“You’re aware you’re currently breaking a lot of treaties just by coming into the Cumbrian border, ain’tcha?”

“We are dealing with an internal affair, and have already approved it with local Cumbrian forces before entering. As soon as we finish, we will leave, but more importantly, we will be leaving you alone.”

“...This about the kid?”

“So, the R1-N0 is there.”

“What’s it to you?”

“As you can see, the child has undergone cruel and horrific treatment by Dyson. We only wish to make things right by taking him somewhere safe.”

David scoffed, tilting his head.

“Far as I remember, it was Florence who let Dyson balls deep into their country, to the point you all had those exact Soldats serving alongside your soldiers. If you knew they were pulling those kinda stunts, why didn’t you do anything about it?”

Surprisingly, Alana looked ashamed.

“I will freely admit that I could not do anything to touch the corporations sooner. You’re correct in saying that their influence over our government is far larger than it ever should have grown. But we are changing that now. That pilot will join the other children and us to testify against them in court. If you can direct the pilot to us now, you can help us loosen the grip of Dyson everywhere.”

“You mean so you can save your asses for enslaving kids to fight wars for you.”

“I will not ask again.”

“Heh, well it ain’t up to me anyway. Up to the kid.”

“Then I will give you ten minutes to ask him to make up his mind. We are authorized to use deadly force if anyone interferes. I certainly hope you’ll make the right choice.”

The monitor turned off with David sighing. He turned to the pilot.

“You two wait for my order. Chloe and Hayes will be joining us soon.”

The pilot saluted as David went back to the Soldat’s palm and was taken back to the ground. The R1-N0 simply stared at David while he crossed his arms.

“I assume you heard the whole thing.”

“Yes.” The voice came out of the R1-N0’s speaker.

“Why did you not go with them if they came to bust you and your buddies out?”

916 remained silent for a moment. After what seemed like a small eternity, he finally gave David an answer.

“After the massacre at the training site, I do not believe my kind would be welcome in any nation. Additionally, the data I have accumulated about Florence through working with their military and the information compiled by Doctor Moreau, indicates that we would still be used for their own purposes.”

“That Alana guy seemed to be decent…Putting aside the whole condescending tone, anyway.”

“Captain Alana may guarantee my safety during the trial, but he cannot protect us from what may happen after. The political ramifications of our very existence puts their government in a precarious state with Cumbria, given we were created for the sole purpose of waging war during peacetime. Our kind will be disposed of one way or another.”

“...”

David was troubled by 916’s predicament far more than he cared to admit. A kid as young as he was should not be able to have this much foresight about their fate, nor should they be so pragmatic about it. 

“You were wanting to know what it means to be free, right, 916?”

“Yes.”

“Well, that answer can only come to you. I can’t tell you what to do, neither can Florence, or anyone else. If you decide to fight them, or even us, then do it. Or you can run, choice is yours.”

David started to walk towards the courtyard exit, hearing more of his merc's Soldats approaching.

“Which one is the most efficient course of action, Boss?”

David chuckled, turning to face 916. He could see in the cockpit, 916’s face was blank, but his eyes looked at him like an actual child now. At least they had not stripped the kid of all his humanity.

“That’s the thing, kid. No one really knows. Ain’t freedom a bitch?”

…

Lieutenant Justeen sat inside the cockpit of her Soldat as her monitor displayed the squad. It contained herself and five other Guardian Soldats. They had followed the trail of destruction the lone Soldat caused and ended up in Cumbrian territory. After Alana had contacted the local officials, they only had a day to complete their operation, which was not nearly enough time. To make matters worse, they could only bring a small force so as to not escalate tensions between the countries.

“I guess we should be thankful Dyson put tracking chips inside all their Soldats…”

 The area they followed the Soldat into appeared to be the ruins of some kind of city, with broken buildings and streets as far as the eye could see. Her team was currently situated behind what she could only assume used to be a skyscraper, with the top half of the building being gone, it was hard to tell.

Had the R1-N0 been taken deeper into territory and not to the border, they would have had zero chance to recapture the machine. But more importantly, they were here to save the pilot. Thankfully, the R1-N0 appeared to be standing still according to her tracker. But from the sounds of things, it looked like this PMC captured the poor child. He had gone through enough suffering, it was time to put a stop to this.

“This is Lieutenant Justeen, listen up!” Justeen sternly spoke to her squad. “The captain gave us ten minutes before we begin the operation. Wolf Company has seasoned Soldat pilots in their ranks, do not underestimate them! We’ll take them out if they try to stop us, save the child, and return back to Florence territory!”

“For the record, kid ain’t exactly in need of saving.” An unknown voice replied to her.

Justeen turned to her right monitor, almost snarling at the voice. This was an encrypted channel, no one should be able to tune into it. “Who is this?! Identify yourself!”

Over the horizon and emerging from around the corner of a shopping center, she could see a…tank?

No, it was not just a tank, it had arms and two massive cannons on the shoulders. It was as if some maniac ripped the top half of a Guardian Soldat and slapped it on some tank treads and called it a day. The colors were bright gray, with black stripes accenting parts of its shoulder armor. The head had a black visor with two tubes and a vent connecting them directly underneath it, making it appear like it was a gas mask. It was unlike any Soldat she had seen before.

“Name’s Boss. Real nice to meet you Florence boys and girls after you trashed our home."

“How is he speaking to us?!”

“Ma’am, it looks like he knew what frequency our comms were on!” One of her soldiers replied.

“Shit, are they hacking into our channel?”

“Nah, not really.” David answered Justeen, the smirk in his tone apparent. “Let’s just say I had a little bird tell me, and leave it at that.”

…

The R1-N0 had its hand on the shoulder of a Guardian Soldat, still remaining in the courtyard as everyone was quickly gathering their gear for an evacuation.

“I…suppose it does make sense that you know how to tap into Florence communications.” The Guardian Soldat’s head turned to the R1-N0. 916’s grunt of affirmation came through the speaker, and both listened back into the conversation.

…

“Now, I’m not keen on killing people usually, and today’s no exception. We don’t wanna hurt ya, but I am only gonna say this once.” Justeen saw the black visor suddenly gain a singular pink circle, it moved left to right before staring right at her, the twin cannons slowly rising up. “Get the fuck off my lawn.”

“SCATTER!” Justeen screamed into her mic. Her squad used their thrusters to quickly back off as she saw the cannons fire upwards, the explosions rocking the buildings they were behind.

“Take him down, turn off Florence channels and switch to physical comms! Formation B!” Justeen wanted to punch the nearest wall.

They could only speak if their Soldats were in physical contact. Trying to coordinate this attack suddenly became much more difficult. Gripping her controls tightly, she accelerated around the streets, keeping an eye on her motion tracker as one of her squadmates followed behind. She refused to be beaten by some petty mercenary.

...

“Flare, Screw. They’re moving into groups of two, I count six Soldats in total." David leaned back into his seat. "Watch your ass, they’re special forces according to the kid.”

“Flare here, roger that!” Chloe’s voice came through the radio.

“Screw, understood. Remember when I asked if we’d get any action, boss? Looks like I’ll get my wish!” An energetic young voice replied back.

“Tch, don’t get too excited. They’ll cap your ass if you give them a chance. Now, move out!”

The tank Soldat began speeding down the streets, facing forward so his cannons wouldn’t bump into any of the buildings. He was slightly worried about getting flanked due to the low turning speed of his machine, but he was confident the armor could hold up. Guardian Soldats never carried ammunition to pierce through his kind of Soldat.

Just as he predicted, two Soldats quickly emerged behind him and opened fire. The cockpit shook violently from from the impact, which made him smirk. His torso quickly spun 180 degrees, the machine guns mounted onto the lower arms pointing right at them.

Feeling the Soldat’s arms rattle as an overwhelming amount of bullet shells flew out of it made David feel alive. At least until he saw the ammunition costs, but he wanted to enjoy the moment for right now.

The two Soldats weren’t expecting him to turn around so quickly and were hit by his bullets before they hid behind separate buildings. David didn’t expect any serious damage to be inflicted, but it was more to show that if they opened fire, he could quickly retaliate, hopefully making them think twice about their strategy.

Seeing the line of rubble in between him and one of the other Soldats made his smirk grow into a full grown smile. He stopped firing before sliding into cover.

...

“Damn, that was close!” The soldier said, reloading his Soldat’s rifle. Justeen quickly hopped over to his building once the fire stopped and put a hand on the shoulder.

“I’ll draw his attention, and you’ll hop onto his mech and take it out with a heat dagger. That armor is way too strong for our rifles to punch through.”

“Understood.”

“Now, on my mark, I’ll head down the street he esca-”

The two quickly noticed the sounds of something crashing, and it was getting closer. They quickly boosted away from each other as the building they were hiding behind suddenly burst with the tank Soldat, arms stretched outwards and unloading its ammo into them. It was covered in rubble, but looked barely affected as the monoeye swung left to right rapidly.

Their Soldats rattled from the amount of bullets hitting them as warning sirens blared inside their cockpits. They hid behind other buildings, but now they would have to improvise with the tank Soldat right on their heels. Justeen heard the pilot’s voice on an open channel.

“Aw come on now, ya’ll are acting like a buncha bitches! These little bullets ain’t gonna hurt ya! If you come out again, I can show ya how the Juggernaut really punches!”

Clenching her teeth, Justeen examined her routes, refusing to be goaded into aggression. She was going to show these mercs that special forces were not to be underestimated.

…

Two of the Florence soldiers sped down the streets, listening closely for the sounds of explosions and gunfire. One of them slowed down for the other and their shoulders made contact.

“We need to help the LT!”

“If there are other Soldats in the area, we can’t let them get the jump on the rest of us either. We need to-”

"SNIPER!”

A narrowly missed shot straight past them and almost took off one of their heads, forcing the soldiers to dash behind a tall building together. Judging from the angle of the shot, the sniper was extremely close to their location, and not at an angle.

The one on the left put their rifle onto their back and pulled out a pistol. The Soldat aimed it blindly over the side and fired in random directions where he guessed the sniper came from.

Another shot from the sniper took the hand clean off, but the Soldat calmly turned towards its comrade. It motioned with its remaining hand, moving it up and down to the right side twice. Both nodding in affirmation, the right Soldat prepared a grenade as the left one got its rifle back out with its remaining hand.

Hayes reloaded the rifle as he made a fist pump to himself in the cockpit. The Soldat itself was lightly armored and far slimmer than the Guardian-types or the R1-N0. It had the same proportions as the Guardian, but its head was angular and narrow with a single circular lens acting as its eyes.

The armor itself was very light and a first glance would tell someone it was a machine meant for scouting, not direct fights. However, this did not stop him from taking the sniper dangerously close to the area of operations, instead of farther away or inside a building. It lied on its stomach down a busy street, aiming down a relatively large kill zone.

“Hah, got your hand, bitch!” He chuckled. “Now poke your head out so I can take it off!”

Instead of a head, a grenade was thrown out on the left side, exploding into a cloud of smoke. Hayes grunted as he switched to thermal vision on his Soldat's monitor, but found it was being scrambled. The Soldat he had shot the hand off of emerged from the smoke, firing on his exact location, pinning him down with machine gun fire. One of the stray shots caught his arm, making the entire Soldat shake.

"Shit, Flare! I've been compromised!"

He grabbed the sniper and stood up and turned around to make a run for it, before the other Guardian Soldat emerged directly in front of it with a dagger that stabbed into the head. The dagger began glowing, parts of it melting before it detonated into a small explosion.

"THE MAIN CAMERA! S-SOMEONE?!"

Hayes' Soldat fell down onto its back as the two soldiers slowly approached him. The undamaged one put its hand onto their comrades shoulder. The damaged Soldat's pilot reached for their encrypted comms, making sure the enemy could hear it as well.

"Lieutenant, do you copy? This is Mark and Hale. We disabled an enemy sniper. This sector is cl-"

Suddenly, a Guardian Soldat came bursting through the building on their left, tumbling into the standing two and causing them all to fall. Quickly getting up and helping their fellow soldier to stand, they noticed several melted armor plates and slash marks on it.

It had no weapons and the arms were cut down to its elbows. The two soldiers quickly raised their weapons when another Soldat emerged from the hole, carrying a shotgun and a small sword.

Compared to every Soldat present, this one was even less armored than the sniper, however its legs resembled that of an insect, the joints being reversed. The entire design of the Soldat was slim, pointy, and extremely agile. The arms were lanky and thin, as well as the legs. The head was almost indistinguishable from its torso, both designs slimmed back and two lenses acting as the eyes.

As soon as it emerged from the hole, it put the shotgun directly against the head of the right Soldat, blasted it apart with one shot before it quickly leapt out of the way as the other soldier tried to retaliate. The armless Soldat attempted to retreat as their comrade tried to give them cover fire.

"THIS IS MARK, NOT CLEAR! NOT CLEAR!"

Chloe gracefully leapt around the streets and buildings at a rapid speed, getting a good look at the damage done. The Soldat she disabled had its head arms completely obliterated, but the cockpit remained intact, surprisingly. The same went for Hayes' Soldat, sighing when she realized what its position was.

"Screw, what did you think a sniper would do against targets THAT close?! Theres like seven buildings we passed you could've holed up in, and you chose the god damn floor?!" 

“S-Shut up, I could’ve handled them!”

“Oh yeah, I see that! Next time how about we strap a bomb to ya since you’re going to get that close in a SCOUTING SOLDAT?!”

…

916 lifted his Soldat's hand off the merc's shoulder, turning his speakers on.

"How quickly can friendly units assist them?"

"Five minutes! We just finished packing all our gear, 2 more soldats will go to help!"

That was too slow. From the sounds of it, they'd get overwhelmed before any of them could even arrive. The only one who could possibly get there-

The R1-N0's engine and thrusters activated, the visor turning into scarlet.

“CE-DRIVE, ACTIVATED.”

"I will get there in two. Prepare to retrieve your friends."

Without another word, the R1-N0 leapt over the entire school with a combination of the jump and its thrusters kicking into full boost. Unlike before, 916 was completely calm, but he would only be able to keep the mode up for a few minutes before he would either lose consciousness, or the suit lost power. The dizziness from before was still present.

“Inconvenient, but will not affect combat performance.” 916 idly commented as his Soldat dodged the rapidly incoming buildings, skirting left and right and creating a small cloud of dust and debris in his wake.

…

The other Soldat Chloe had been fighting joined the fight, attempting to put her suit down with careful precision shots. She leapt from building to building, trying to get close enough to where she could effectively use her shotgun. But the soldiers kept retreating behind rubble that was too tall for her to jump on, or positions that would leave her far too out in the open.

"Tch, you're making this a real pain for me!"

One of the soldiers' rifles aimed away from her, instead towards the building she was about to land on. And with a single shot, destabilized the floor. Before she could realize what happened, the building collapsed and took out her balance the moment her Soldat landed.

The two soldiers closed in on her as her Soldat struggled to get up, her armor shaking violently from the direct hits. She threw her sword at the one approaching on the left and skewered the head, making it fall to the ground as the weapon fired wildly. The one on its right ducked to dodge friendly fire, and saw Chloe raise her shotgun.

"HAH, I WIN!-"

The armless Soldat emerged from the corner of the ruins she was trapped in and rammed straight into her, making the shotgun fire into the air as her Soldat fell over again. It put its foot on the arm holding the shotgun as his squadmate quickly approached and put the rifle straight on her cockpit.

"...Fuck." Chloe grumbled, her one arm raising into the air, motioning a surrender.

…

Justeen and her other squadmate dodged the falling rubble as it almost collapsed right on top of them, feeling the ground shake from the firing of the tank Soldat's cannons. David kept firing his machine guns every time they tried to poke their head out, and barraged them with the cannons to smoke them out, but he was starting to sweat.

The ammo count for his arms were critically low, and he wouldn't be able to use the shoulder cannons if they got too close. And from what he heard on the comms, they got Chloe and Hayes. He just sighed and sat upright again. His crew and the kid could escape before the rest of Florence could catch up, that's all that really mattered to him.

Suddenly, his motion tracker was picking up a new signature that was approaching. 

"Damn, looks like the others are about to hit me too-" He stopped when he realized just how fast that new signature was approaching. It was far too quick to be any of the Florence Soldats, did that mean it was?-

"Lieutenant Justeen? This is EH-916." A boy's voice calmly called out on the open channel.

"God, they just called you numbers…? Ahem, this is Justeen, we are in the middle of active combat and we will retrieve you-"

"I thank you for saving me and the generation 2 Enhanced Humans. However, I am not coming with you."

Justeen recoiled in her seat with shock. Looking at her motion tracker, it had gone from standing still a few hundred meters away to moments from being upon them in the matter of almost two minutes. Her eyes went wide as she remembered what he had done to other Dyson guards.

"The last directive given to me was 'be free and live life to the fullest'. I am still unsure of what that means-”

Justeen brought her rifle back up as did her squadmate, fully focusing on the signature who was now only seconds away from entering the combat zone.

“-But I know, my freedom does not lie with you.”

…

Chloe and Hayes’ Soldats were put up against the wall as the soldiers still had their weapons pointed at them, before their heads turned to their left.

The R1-N0 suddenly leapt over one of the taller buildings, making everyone look up in shock, the thrusters kicking in at the last second as it landed directly in front of the soldiers. The one without arms charged in first, only to be met by the R1-N0 activating its thrusters straight into it, pushing him, and the soldier behind him out the way.

The force of which it pushed them back was something both of them were unprepared for, skidding past the one Soldat with the sword in its head.

916 quickly grabbed the sword as it slid by before deactivating its thrusters, the soldiers sliding back and only stopping when their backs hit a building. Within a few seconds of crashing, 916 skewered both their heads with the sword, nailing them in place before he grabbed the rifle from their hand, and rushed back to the two mercs.

“M-MY SWORD!” Chloe cried out in anguish. 

When the Soldat’s heads exploded, it destroyed the sword with it, the two collapsing onto each other. As a small fire erupted from the top of their torsos. 916 stopped his thrusters just enough to slide right in front of the two, grabbing a shotgun in one hand and a sniper in the other.

“I’m borrowing this. Sorry.” 916 calmly apologized to Chloe.

“MY SNIPER!” Hayes cried out in anguish.

“MOTHERFUCKER!” Chloe shouted, slamming her terminal. “YOU CAN’T JUST STEAL OUR WEAPONS AND...-” 916 disabled his open channel for the time being so he could focus better on the fight.

Not missing a beat, the R1-N0 activated its thrusters and leapt over the building, getting a view of the Lieutenant’s Soldat and her other squadmate flanking David. They pulled evasive maneuvers, firing precise shots while speeding away from the tank Soldat and landing direct hits on the R1-N0’s front armor.

Each shot shook the Soldat and chipped away parts of the armor, but failed to cause any serious damage. David meanwhile escaped out of line of sight from the others.

When the R1-N0 finally landed on the ground, it rushed into the buildings to avoid any more direct hits, putting the shotgun on its back as it prepared the sniper. Checking the ammo, 916 realized it had none left. 

“Adapting combat functionality.” 916 calmly said, the thrusters beginning to activate again, waiting for the Soldats to come closer.

...

Justeen’s breath was caught in her throat. Earlier, the standard soldiers were blowing apart each Dyson guard and their limbs with a single shot, how was this one so resilient?! Her eyes dilated when she began to realize how quickly this one moved in comparison to the standard guards.

It was likely that the security variants were far weaker in combat capability than the ones Captain Alana served with. Recalling that presentation she watched at Dyson Headquarters, they mentioned the pilot was what made the machine so effective.

Which meant…the children were the real threat?!

Her squadmate went ahead of Justeen, attempting to catch 916 by surprise, only for the head to be swatted off and broken into pieces by a sniper rifle. He dropped the sniper as a heat dagger suddenly emerged from a hatch inside the armor of its left arm, which it used to cut the arms off. And with one kick, 916 sent it sliding backwards onto the street below. Quickly turning to face Justeen he readied the shotgun, barrel aimed for her legs.

“No you don’t!” Justeen gritted her teeth as her Soldat pulled the trigger on her rifle, aiming for his weapon.

The shotgun exploded off the R1-N0’s hand, to which it quickly switched over to its heat dagger and closed the distance. With pinpoint accuracy, she aimed for the joints, the R1-N0 failing to dodge in time as each shot slowed it down, giving her enough time to reach for her own combat dagger. 

Without warning, the visor of the R1-N0 suddenly switched offline into black, and stalled. Justeen did not waste the chance and went for the head with her own dagger. The visor switched back into a blue as it ducked, making her attack miss and stab into the nearby building.

It quickly rose back up, using its horn to knock the torso backwards, making her stumble and unable to catch her balance. Using her rifle, Justeen took more shots at the joints, finally making an arm explode off and forcing the R1-N0 to stagger. 

“It’s over!-”

An explosion suddenly knocked her suit’s feet off the ground, tumbling backwards as debris rained on her main camera, the buckles on her seat barely restraining as she shook violently, the rolling finally stopping after a few seconds.

She struggled to keep her eyes open as consciousness started to fade and the ringing of her ears settled down, but the last thing she saw was the smoke coming out of the tank Soldat’s cannons, the pink monoeye staring her down. Justeen tried to reach for her control before she fell unconscious, her world fading into black.

...

916 sheathed the heat dagger onto his backpack before grabbing the R1-N0's arm on the floor. Once he retrieved his part, 916 slowly walked over to Justeen’s Soldat, stomping on her rifle and crushing it into a miniature explosion of sparks and smoke. 

“Thank you, Lieutenant Justeen and Captain Alana, for your concern. Please give my regards to the men who attempted to rescue me with you, and the children of Generation Two.”

The R1-N0’s head turned back to David’s tank Soldat, giving it a single nod.

“Primary threats eliminated. Awaiting orders, Boss.”

916 could not see it, but David's smile was ear to ear.

“Same plan. Pack our shit, and get out ASAP.”

…

After dragging every Florence Soldat to a safer location and igniting a flare, Wolf Company quickly evacuated the abandoned school and left in a small convoy. The Soldats who were not part of the fight took the role of guards as everyone drove in a scattered formation to prevent devastating losses in case of an ambush.

Towards the middle, the damaged Soldats rode in a massive cargo-truck, the truck being the largest one in the convoy.

David, 916, Chloe, and Hayes were being driven by one of the engineers, the four of them in the back of a salvaged APC. Finally settling down after the skirmish, David chuckled and crossed his arms, sweat dripping off his arms and the tank top that barely fit him. 

“Now that was some serious skill, kid! I heard the cheers from everyone as you rushed in like some kind of hero.”

“My specialization is close combat rush tactics, Boss. That is the only reason why my R1-N0 was so effective against the Florence soldiers. You are the one who saved me, again.”

“Say what?” David asked, genuinely surprised.

“The R1-N0 could not power my CE-Drive for very long, especially since it was used twice in the span of a few hours. The power dying out in the middle of combat was unintentional. The only reason I am riding with you and not them is because your cannon knocked the Lieutenant unconscious.”

“Heh, no shit?” Chloe chuckled, lightly punching his arm. “Still wouldn’t sell yourself too short kid, that was some serious asskicking you did. That being said, I am still VERY pissed at you for blowing up my weapons!”

“A-And my sniper rifle!” Hayes said, his hands trembling. “You used that thing like a baseball bat!”

“What’s baseball?-”

“A SNIPER IS  A LONG RANGED WEAPON, YOU LITTLE-!”

Chloe’s fist slammed the top of Hayes’ head, and putting one hand gently on 916’s head.

“I don’t wanna hear it from the dumbass who thought you could use a sniper rifle within 10 meters of your enemy.”

David simply chuckled watching their banter. He then raised an eyebrow as he looked at the bewildered 916.

“Putting their bitching aside, they got a point, 916. You did technically trash Wolf Company property.”

“Am I expected to pay recompense?”

“As a matter of fact, you are. But, considering our circumstances, I figure I’ll give you a mulligan.”

916 opened his mouth before David cut him off.

“Mulligan is a sport thing. Figure of speech, basically means I’m letting you off the hook.”

916 closed his mouth. Hayes grumbled under his breath while both David and Chloe chuckled, looking at 916.

“Well, I suppose you wanna be getting off at our next stop, 916?” David asked. “I was the one who said you should determine your next course, and not us.”

916 remained silent as he looked at the gray floor, speaking barely above a whisper, so quiet that the APC’s engine almost drowned him out.

“You asked me earlier why I didn’t go with Florence after they saved my friends. They in fact, did not save them in time.”

Everyone sat up on their seats as 916 continued.

“The kids they rescued were part of generation two of the Enhanced Human program. I am generation one, with generation two enhancements. I…am the last GEN-1 alive.”

No one said anything, the three mercenaries exchanging glances.

“Not only would the people despise my continued existence in Florence, there would be nowhere for me to go. My only skills lie in combat, I would either get kidnapped again and used for malicious purposes, or confined to a government building. I am alone.”

David got up from his seat and put an arm on 916’s shoulder.

“You don’t gotta be. If you ask me, you have a place in Wolf Company, 916. You’re just like us. You don’t know what the hell you’re doing in this world, and you wanna find out the reason.”

916’s expression did not change, but David could swear there was a twinkle in his eyes.

“Can’t say that you’ll be danger free with us, or that we’re even a good choice at all. But you got my word, ain’t no one here is gonna take your freedom away.”

“...Then I believe staying with Wolf Company is my best course of action.” 916 nodded confidently.

Chloe cheered loudly as she suddenly wrapped an arm around 916’s neck, catching him by surprise. The Engineer driving joined Chloe in the cheer as Hayes just shrugged.

“ALRIGHT! First step is paying me back for my shotgun and sword you broke!” Chloe said frowning, pointing a finger into his cheek, 916 only blinking in response.

“And my sniper too! Though it’s finally nice not being the rookie now.” Hayes said, putting a finger to his chin as a thoughtful look overcame his annoyance.

“Oh please, the kid’s like what, seven and he knows the basics of combat more than you. You’re still the rookie here.” David said, looking unimpressed at Hayes. “That being said, we can’t just call you 916 the entire time. That’s just depressing.”

“We’re giving him a name, Boss?” The engineer driving asked.

“Yeah, a name, then we make it official to the crew." David leaned back in his seat as he continued to think what was next. "We also gotta make sure we turned off that tracker on his R1-N0 they sniffed us out with, give it paint worthy of Wolf Company, and get us a new job so he can pay back these two crybabies.”

Chloe’s arm did not relinquish 916’s neck as his cheeks squished up against her bicep and chest, pointing an accusing finger at David. 

“You can’t call us crybabies, boss! I’ve seen the look in your eyes whenever you pay for the machine gun ammo for the Juggernaut!”

“Which is why I tell you to shut your asses up about your broken toys! That can be replaced for nearly under half the cost of that junk!”

“Then why the hell do you still use it if it’s that expensive?!”

“Because it has a purpose, girl!”

“What, big man likes big guns, is that the dumbass reason?!”

“YOU’RE GOD DAMN RIGHT IT IS!”

“What was the name you were thinking of, boss?” 916 asked, putting an end to the argument before it could escalate.

David and Chloe cleared their throats while Hayes and the engineer just shrugged.

“Well…Can’t be a number, that’s for sure,” David commented, putting his hand under his chin.

Chloe took a closer look at 916’s eyes, noting that even though they were violet, they could change colors based on what she saw earlier today.

“Oh, I got it! Vi!” Chloe said, finally releasing 916’s neck so he could sit properly. He rubbed his neck slightly while she snapped her fingers. “Vi, like violet!”

“Vi? What kind of name is that? Why not something like…uh…” Hayes trailed off. "...Okay, I got nothing."

“Well, what do you think?” David asked, everyone turning expectantly toward 916.

“...Because my eyes are violet. I see the correlation. The name will suffice.”

“HAHA! YES! My ideas are the best, aren’t they?” Chloe shouted excitedly.

“Psh, what a kissass…” Hayes shook his head.

“Hah, Welcome to Wolf Company then, Vi.” David said, extending his hand towards the child.

“Thank you, boss.” Vi replied, with the slightest elevation in his pitch as his tiny hand shook David’s.

…

CHAPTER 1: END

Author's Note:

And so, the adventure truly begins!

Thanks for reading this far and I hope you enjoyed this a bit more than the prologue. Chapter 2 is where imo the story begins to really pick up the pace, and that should hopefully be out in a few days once this post goes live!

I actually Chapters 2-5 already written, but these tumblr posts go through revision from my google docs, and I also don't want to spam you guys when you're mostly here for anime waifu simping.

Relatedly, besides Chloe, there shall be more waifu material joining the fray in Chapter 2! Granted, that's not why they're there since this is an actual story, but ya'll are smart enough to know that.

...I hope.

I think it's really obvious at this point how much the Gundam influence is in this story, but hey, write what you love, right? But on that note, I will make a song recommendation to close this chapter out, because I am apparently incapable of writing anything that doesn't fit thematically with a song from an anime/game.

Orphans’ tears, love bears the burden of sorrow because it can make it stronger You’re on my mind; can you hear the blues that the sky sings?

Ah… The blue light that rises in the dark night hides your loneliness

The only thing that remains after the battle is sorrow What do soldiers see in the fragments of their dreams?

Orphans, now we send a ship called hope out to the sky You’re on my mind; in this instant, the sky sings the blues

[acebytaemin]

top 5 perfumes, top 5 makeup products & top 5 songs you would play to bracha… 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🤭💘

ouhhh i haven’t actually gotten to smell very many perfumes that i liked 😔 i truly mostly don’t like anything (at least out of the things i’ve gotten to smell which is all like. drugstore available stuff like no niche perfumery things which i rly do want to get into!) howeverrr… i do have some that i like:

1. killian angel’s share (i WILL buy this for myself.. one day 🧿)

2. givenchy l’interdit rouge

3. d&g the only one = ysl libre intense

4. tom ford black orchid

5. fuckass lush honey i washed the kids LMFAO i really love it it’s my after-shower scent, doesn’t smell incredible upon first spritz but it develops into this gorgeous subtly sweet scent that i looove to go to sleep with. same goes for lush twilight but it’s a lavender scent so you’d hate it kfhskkd

makeup products well 🤭 i WOULD usually put l’oreal 24h matte foundation here prob as number one however i haven’t worn foundation in almost a full year now so!

1. fenty beauty gloss bombs yes they’re incredible yes they’re worth it. every single cent. i get one every time i travel somewhere w a Sephora LMAO i currently have fenty glow & fu$$y currently 💋

2. maybelline lifter gloss (currently own 5 tubes (moon, 2x silk, topaz, red flag and looking to get more i need one in every bag at every occasion. way cheaper but also way less thick/long lasting version of fenty)

3. maxfactor 2000 calories mascara in waterproof listen no matter how i flip it no matter which mascara i try (ive tried too faced, benefit, ysl, dior and soooo fawking ON) this one is just IT. the only one with such good separation and holding up a curl and lasting the entire day. my main girl always

4. nudestix! i have 3 shades rn (naughty n spice, bondi bae, in the nude) i use them depending on my mood for the day as blush & bronzer and they give such a beautiful sunkissed vibe i love them sm. longwearing too

5. maybelline age rewind (fuck you in advance teo) concealer in shade 5 brightener it’s so good stays all day doesn’t crease mwaaah mwah i also use it for spot concealing if i get spots 😌 gorgeous & cheap you gotta love it

BEST FOR LAST…. literally where do i beginnnn bang chan answer my calls i need you to HEAR my vision. this is just going to be off the top of my head bc if i really got out my playlists and started to get into this i’d need to quit my job to focus on this alone 🙏🏼

1. periferija by voyage & nucci i have already gone ON abt this and i want to show this to them with super selfish intent like to talk them into doing something similar bc i just really really truly need chan and changbin going STUPID on a balkan beat it’s actually crucial to me. lyrics gotta be in a similar vein too A JA JAK KAO TERIJER i know you know. these fits bc you KNOW i need the tank top + chain combo

2. nad****a by zera oh listen this is again selfish of me bc i have this VISION of all of them doing this and ofc felix starts the song what with ‘dragon’ being in the meaning of his name and it’s gotta be a super dynamically shot video kinda like aespa supernova only at the club. felix insane face to voice ratio has to shock your system within the first 5 seconds of a song for it to truly HIT so he goes ‘ko zmaj bebo ja sam tako nadrkana’ [slaps the camera away from himself] ‘oko nas samo momci s lošim navikama’ [an almost 360 spin of the camera wherein you see bracha and then it gets to hyunjin who gets the next line] ‘ceo splav noćas popunjen je barbikama’ [zoom out to see all of danceracha aka my pretty dollface racha w hyunjin in the middle] i could go on. what i personally would change abt the song though is instead of the prechorus/verses i would do a lot of rapping i know my bracha would devour the track i am 100000% sure of it. the one other line i would NEED to keep is chan doing ‘gde god dođem imam pratnju kao predsednik’ ofc coupled w a shot of them all behind him 😌 uhm can you tell this was ALL i thought abt on todays walk LMFAOOOO i need to be like. sedated

3. keeping it SHORT NOW PROMISEEE i just gotta show nyokosuzi to my channieeeeeee i know he’d love it i know he’d relate jebeni lider etc you know how it goes i would LOVE to see his flustered face LMFAO you know how he writes the most suggestive nastiest lyrics and then pretends he doesn’t know shit. Yes exactly

4. opanci - nucci LOOK the nasty fucking tone of voice this man has just screams changbin to me and the mix of traditional singing w the rap strikes a chord to me (loš momak by nikolija another good example) i just think they’d both love it anddd sound so good on the track it’s a win win situation

5. a classic.. GLUH I NIJEM ZBOG NJE i can’t explain to you how much i want a bouncy beat from chan i know he’s got it in him ive heard what he can do. if they WANT to be pathetic i neeeeed ‘bacam ruže sto i jednu ružu na kučku bez duše ❤️‍🩹’ energy over a delicious beat and not fuckass lose my breath with underwhelming vocals type pathetic shit (+ bonus something like Divljam w the bouncy beat and added balkan spice in the instrumental PLUSS kako gleda me ko vučica vuka no no now ive said too much.)

[maryhadalittlehobby]

Interview with the vampire Season S2E5 Liveblog

"Don't be afraid just start the tape"

Don't be afraid just start the tape -okay but what if I'm afraid

The San Francisco and Dubai red opening! We in for it!

Not Assad rocking his fresh roller set.

Oh my God I said it in my last review@ that Louis starts talking all dreamily and I felt like it was the pull of the Sun!! and Armand just said something in a similar vein

Fuck boy for Lunch!

There you have it! merciful death! Someone half in love with death begging for it within an hour there is Armand

That's some longer in shots on Daniel's notes but why can't I still read them what the hell!

"Did we 😗😏*smooth jazz*" i need that to become a thing  (If you watch captions that makes more sense lol)

so you climb in it close the lid and bang. a nod to Loustats first love scene post louis turning.

something something about louis (a black man) calling Daniel (a white man) boy

God Louis loo.ks so good in the 70s but damn he looks good in every decade really

Louis shows him vamp powers and Daniel says "Are you the zodiac killer" Lmao Sir what?  😂

(sidebar sidebar I Love how I'm getting a commercial for Interview with the Vampire while I'm watching Interview with the Vampire-like you got me. I was even contemplating buying It on Amazon for the uncensored version. You got me AMC)

"Do you want to now?!"Not Daniel GULPing. I volunteer as tribute!

I love the nod to the film with the start of the interview

Daniel's giving DreamStat vibes right now.  Going along parroting  Louis' complaints about Lestat and adding on lol. So the photograph scene last ep

"Will you do the thing again?" I agree to Daniel that was hot

There we go-the trigger that set Louis off was and is Daniels dismissive attitude to his trauma and in particular about Claudia.

"I took a scoop out of your throat" HA! Like ices cream?

Louis said he thinks he can't remember the rest of the interview because he was so high from Daniels blood. Interesting that tainted blood could effect them(possibly) so much

"You're a liar Daniel." "So are you Louis" Daniels is like Blah blah blah blah let's get past it. We gotta figure some shit out lol

Crackhead Louis is soooo convincing lol

OMG this fight is worse than the Lestat one. Emotional punch after emotional punch ugh my poor fledgling Loumand shipper heart.

CHOP MY HANDS OFF! MY DADDY VAMPIRE GROOMED ME INTO A LITTLE BITCH! MY BOTHER MY SISTER POOR ME!

Holy shit Louis walked out into the sun because he realized Claudia hated him. I absolutely did not expect this in THIS episode .They are in Merrick territory already! But I like this change.

Didn't love the cgi ash but the after burn effects are amazing KNB back at it again

This interrogation of 70s Daniel THIS IS TOO MUCH THiS IS TOO MUCH Armand got me quaking in my boots right now

Daniel cries out he didn't even want me in the end. ugh its not about Claudia for Louis and Lestat. Its not about Daniel with Louis and Armand. Just pawns and scapegoats

Louis and Daniel-The buddy duo. I did not know I was looking for.

Armand not telling Louis that Lestat is saying he loves him! I had to take a lap around the room. My Loustat heart. That would have absolutely made the difference in Louis going back to Lestat in the 70s.

Not both their feet in the rocks!LOL

"Met moi dan mon cercuiel"armand armand The paralells!

Not Armand convincing me to REST too. Assad killed this scene and this whole season honestly.

Louis saved Daniel by pulling rank. Daniel lowkey getting choked up about Louis words of encouragement after ugh they need to stay best friends.

Armand at the end with his comic book villian looking ah fit

Great episode no notes. Maybe my new favorite of the season.

[cdyssey]

New Tech (1.04) Rewatch:

The linguist in me has ALWAYS loved this cold open. Looooove regional colloquialisms.

“This is a classroom, not a hoagie stand.” QKQKWKDJSJ

Damn, last time I was up this early was to cuss out the mailman. I don’t need all them bills comin’.” SNSNSNS. Ugh, Ava’s fits are always immaculate—those high-waisted white pants.

“Ah, tech has its place—like when you haven’t been with a man for a few years.” JESUS GODNDIWJSNSNS. OKAY, freeze frame this shot. There’s Jacob’s reaction up front and Gregory staring straight into the camera in the back. BUT ALSO, there’s the extra next to Gregory straight up LOSING it.

“I had to potty train myself.” :((

“Okay, who do you gotta bang to get into the analytics annex?” AQkqkwkswkKWJSNS. Two sex jokes in less than two minutes. Mel is on a roll

Love Mrs. Barbara Howard lying and plastering a huge smile onto her face. <3 go, girlboss. Repress ur insecurities

“I love how you guys will just park anywhere.” lmao

“Now who took that picture of me…” ANSNSNS

“Got a hotmail. I once even rode in a Tesla.” i fucking love her

“I’m a little behind on my hotmail correspondence…sssss.” AJQJJSSN

“No, not Kaleel. Everybody knows that little dork can read.” QHQJWHJWJ

HILLIAM GETS ME EVERY TIME LMAO

“A car full of women.” ANSNSNSNS, never change, Gregory.

“Like, you wanna run up the Rocky steps, but you can’t take a punch in the face!” Love this whole monologue, but especially the part where she’s like it’s a respect thing. This is the kids’ history and to sanitize it is to do a disservice to them.

The kid plays William is sooo cute.

“Sometimes I wonder if I put you on too high a pedestal, but then I think it’s not high enough. I say, ‘Janine, she’s a person just like you…’” Ughhshhshshshs, oh, this dialogue always gets me because that’s exactly the crux of Barbara’s insecurities. She has been lofted to a high pedestal—by both her own design and the admiration of others—and feeling as though there’s a gap between where she is and where people perceive her to be absolutely GUTS her. It’s the curse of the perfectionist.

The shot of Melissa smiling before William starts to read is so wonderful.

“Normally, I encourage cheating, but girl, you gots to let me know.” AJDNSNSN

“It just made me feel like I was being pushed out to sea.” :((

“Are those jellybeans on your belt?” AJQNDNW, I love when Barbara is mean. God.

“Basically, I was a jerk.” / “I wish my ex-husband could ever admit that much.” UGH!!! UGHHHHHH. UGH!!!!!!!!!!

“This is who we are—the good, the bad, and the ugly.” 😭

I really do love Jacob and Mel’s relationship.

“You’re gonna sell those, aren’t ya?” / “And what would you rather I do, Melissa?” AOQKQKAKWIWOWNANSNA. Now kiss

Barb and Janine dancing with little William. 😭😭

SHDNSNSN, great end stinger.

[sprouts-on-a-log]

Tuesday 7/2/24

watched:

The Bear Season 3, Episodes 1-4:

possible spoilers? better safe than sorry.

Tomorrow

This show never fails to make me sob. I was a little confused what was going on at first because it's been a while since I watched the other two seasons. I think there's also a sort of rhythm to the show I have to warm up to again. But once it kept going, I felt alllll those emotions that made me love this show in the first place. It feels like every thought and action is at the forefront and you're given time to flow with it instead of them shoving the next idea at you.

I was really happy to see the evolution of his time in New York and the casual kindness of his roommate covering him with a blanket. Just small gestures throughout that really proves how so much of what he's done has been done with the help of those around him. Also shows just how focused he is on cooking even at the cost of distancing himself from people he really loves.

The shot of Sydney appreciating his meal??? I cheered idek why. She's so happy and impressed and that makes my heart full knowing everything that happens later.

Beautiful first episode! Very excited to binge the rest.

(the rest of these are more scattered thoughts I jotted down during so they're very rough)

Next

Feels more like a typical episode. Less artistic and gentle.

Love the relationship between Sydney and her father. Very sweet to see.

Banging song at the start lmao

"Is it fucking rich, Richard??" omggg

genuinely what is this argument, they're not even attempting to make progress or come to an understanding

Ok but Carmy is literally insane for wanting to change the menu every single day. That is not sustainable at all, pushing too hard when this is genuinely still so new to all of you. Like, your plan is to be a team more and then you proceed to choose to do something that is all you. I get he's feeling a lack of control so this is something he CAN control, but damn bro. This only works if everyone is in full agreement. Forcing is just going to distance yourself further and create grudges.

aghhh him slowly becoming just like the abusive teacher oh nooo. he doesn't see how he's acting. i think he's just gone into full survival/freak out mode. i feel bad for him.

super intense episode, felt shorter somehow

Marcus :(((

Doors

Marcus' eulogy :(((((

ah yes the distinct feeling of teetering on certain disaster

Now Sydney can ALSO get some trauma from working in this kind of environment, oh goody! (thinking again about how hopeful she used to be, and just the reality being so so stressful now)

I feel bad laughing about Neil with the soup plsss

Tuesday surprise lmao there is no logic in this place

......aghhhhhhhhhhhh

Conclusion: Carmy is losing it again. I thought we were healing.

Violet

"Did it hurt so much that it didn't hurt at all?" :'(

Rich loving his daughter so so much will always mean so much to me. It's always so bittersweet.

"Whatever grows together goes together." :'( pt.2 (two great quotes this episode??)

I love that Frank at least tried to clear the air a bit. I honestly think he was right for that. It is awkward, but he's clearly open to having Rich still be in his daughter's life. Coming to some sort of ok-ness with each-other just so that she can be happy is mature and good.

WELL SHIT

[rottingsparrow]

Oh boy oh boy here it is my thoughts on Lore Olympus episodes 1-10 I didn't include any pictures because I'm figuring out how I wanna do this also im tired but here it is:

Episode One: Stag, You’re It

Why the title

Minthes hair like connects to her head without a line not bad just a comment

Hades’ sharp ass nose but I enjoy the colors, not super bright yknow

Hera looks so cool but also like snatched almost unnaturally

She is a god tho so

Zeus lets goooo such a solid color imo

Im sorry but artemis’ hair is a lil ugly

Love that all the main characters are snatched /s

Episode Two: Who is She?

And Persophone is now 3 shades lighter ok

Also like i hate the dress Artemis gives persephone it ugly

Persophones hair changed lengths like 2 times but maybe im seeing it wrong

Also artemis if she doesnt wanna be here leave wtf

How is. How is hades holding his drink

Zeus changed colors king

I understand lighting and shading but like. Damn

Ok so if Poseidon hates Odysseus does that mean the events of the Odyssey already happened

Ep 3: Who is She pt 2

LMAO what is hades’ nose

Why did she have random parts w/ no color not a complaint just curious

HER FOREHEAD SO LARGE IN THIS ONE PANEL

“Short sighted” Do we ever see him wear glasses again

Zeus’ lil. Hair thingies keep disappearing

“Honestly i think she puts Aphrodite to shame” wow comparing women/hj

Seriously tho like. why

Ep 4: Who is she pt 3

Idk why she does random scenes where the characters are all like just one color. Not bad per say but weird

Gives artemis huge boobs and in one panel they are either smaller or gone

Artemis bestie if that one thing distracts you from your friend you gotta get ur priorities straight

“Hey kiddo wanna have some real fun” ew

Omg purple eros

So much hair

Did she just give her hair powers so she could draw diff styles lets be honest

Ep 5:

Aphrodites hip angle is so sharp it could kill me

“Friggin” makes my mind go to supernatural and i dont appreciate it

Omg shes a cinnamon roll shes so adorable and gorgeous and yet sexy and *i get shot*

Mother emotionally guilting her son omg its my life

The listen panel. Haunts my dreams

Why does she have so many different painting/coloring styles

LMAO LOOK AT HADES ON THE BALCONY its. Its bad

Ep 6

W hy do they stand like that persephone pls

Love demeters colors tho

This is. This is the metaphor for the maidenhood thing right

Thats how i always saw it

Wow persephone you just woke up and you look so pretty wowww woww

Rachel rachel please does her hair have bangs or not just choose

I do actually like the panel with cerberus, persephone, and hades its nice

Ep 7

Cerberus is so cute

Hades shut the fuck up

The coat is cute

Persephone get off the counter this isnt ur house

Whos minthe? Stop being nosy damn

Didnt really have much to say bout this one

Ep 8

Why are both their eyes open i know they arent in love but that so weird right

Is his dick out or is she just naked on him

“Salutiations” old man

Every second i read persephones eyes get bigger

“I would pay you a salary to barge in on every single aspect of my life” is actually cute however. You literally just met her she hasnt even introduced herself

I dont understand why he thought she meant sex idk

I like that his business card has diff names for him

SHE WAS HOLDING HERS IN HER TITTY WHY

Ep 9

Persephone giggling over that is kinda weird imo but whatever

Persephone please pic a face shape

“Come here puppy” look. Look at her face. Wtf

Train ur dogs hades smh

We never see like any of these dogs fuck you rachel i want dogs

“Let the unionize see if i care” haha so funny haha wow so. So funny. Hades ur such a character

Why is her mouth so high up in this one panel

Hehe puppy

Man in bushes

Ep 10

Why does he have so many cars he doesnt need em

The little :p panel is cute

NOT HER FACE AGAIN RACHEL PLEASE JUST LOOK ONCE MORE

Stop yelling hades

Persephones hair is looking bad rn ngl

I love the colors of the underworld tbh

Rachel please go in depth on how you travel there between realms i am so curious

Artemis randomly gains bangs

I know her hair was flowing but her bangs are too short to completely disappear

Why do his eyes randomly turn red honestly

Goodbye thank god

[smilez-a-lot-blog]

All I Want For Christmas

(So, I did a thing, had an idea, haven’t written in a while but was inspired by the discord. TALK TO ME NICE PLEASE!! Lmao) Super cheesy, who doesn’t like a little cheese now and again! Hope you enjoy. 

Birthdays, Thanksgiving and Christmas were definitely always among Ryan’s least favorite days of the year. They only served as a reminder for all the things that she so desperately wanted but never had. Things that she never thought she would have. It was the reason why Halloween had always been her favorite because for one day out of the year she could be anything but Ryan Wilder.  

But this year, this year was going to be different because for the first time in forever, she had a family to celebrate with. Being Batwoman had brought many beautiful things into her life but the best by far was her Bat family which of course now included Sophie.

It was still wild to her how far the two of them have come. Sophie went from being the bane of her existence to one of the main reason’s she loved waking up every day. Life was truly funny.  

Ryan wanted to show Luke, Mary and Sophie how special and truly grateful she was for their presence in her life by throwing a small Christmas dinner party. Granted she could barely boil water without setting off the smoke detector, she felt like she still had enough talent in her fingers to press a couple of buttons on her phone to order a banging Christmas dinner.

“Soph, just the woman I was looking for!”

Ryan was surprisingly chipper for someone who had pulled a double shift at The Hold Up which had been packed all day. Gotham was full of lonely people who had chosen to drown there sorrows and search for happiness in the bottom of a shot glass. Usually that would also be Ryan’s plan but not this year. She was leaning on the counter of the bar making a list for the party.

“What are you so chipper about?”

Sophie draped her jacket over the chair before she sat in it.

“You alright?”

Immediately she noticed something was off. Lately she had become somewhat of an expert in Sophie and her ever changing moods. Although Ryan herself had been going through a lot, finding her birth mother and dealing with the Bat trophies still being out there, it hadn’t been lost on her that she wasn’t the only one that had been going through something.

As much as she enjoyed being apart of the Bat team, Ryan knew that Sophie was never the type of woman that would be able to be on the sidelines for too long. Nor did she want her to be. Her talents were far to big, to play such a small role. The lack of direction in her life at the moment had her feeling more than a little lost, no matter how hard she tried to cover it up. Ryan paid attention. Probably more now than ever before because studying Sophie and all her ways had become one of her most favorite new hobbies.

“Yeah…”

She responded unconvincingly as Ryan poured her a double shot of Tequila.

“Come on Soph…what’s up?”

Sophie tilted her head looking at Ryan and the soft welcoming smile that rested on her lips. As if she was fully aware that her smile had become a source of visual kryptonite for her, she flashed her pearly whites. That smile gave her butterflies.

“Come on, you know you want to tell me. Who did it so I can call in a favor to Batwoman to go tag that ass.”

Her teasing finally made Sophie smile.

“There it is..”

She further pushed which just caused her smile to spread wider. Sophie sighed and picked up the shot that Ryan had poured her and down it in one swallow. Ryan’s eyes widened, this must have been bad.

“Jordan said my mom wants me to come to dinner for Christmas.”

“Really? Well…that’s a good thing right? That must mean she finally has come around and that she misses you.”

Sophie wasn’t moved.

“Or that Jordan begged her to let me come to dinner and is hoping us pretending to be one big happy family will erase everything that she said to me.”

One thing she had come to learn about Ryan was that one of her favorite ways to comfort those that she cared about was through touch. Softly she caressed Sophie’s hand. The softness of her hand and the sweetness of her smile, dammit there went those butterflies again.

“Remember what you kept telling me, if you’re mom can’t see how amazing you are and accept you for you. It’s her loss.”

The look of defeat within her eyes devastated and honestly angered Ryan. She’d never met Ms. Diane Moore but if she did, she was sure going to let her know what she thought of her for putting her daughter through this torture. Ryan’s hand gradually rose to Sophie’s chin and lifted it so that she was looking her directly in the eyes.

“It’s her loss…”

She repeated.

“You are absolutely one of the most loving, loyal and beautiful people I’ve ever met. If your mother can’t see that, because of who you love…honestly and disrespectfully fuck her.”

The hardness of her words amused Sophie.

“Thanks Ry.”

While she poured her another shot, the list that she had been working so hard on, caught Sophie's attention.

“What’s this?”

“Oh, well I wanted to put together a little dinner for the crew this Christmas, but looks like you might not make it?”

“I don’t know, I honestly don’t want to but I dont want to disappoint Jordan either…leave a space for me, just in case?”

Ryan smiled at even just the possibility of it.

“Always.”

She told her. Being that the bar was actually busy, Ryan got pulled away, but not before grabbing her list and folding it up to place it in her back pocket. Intently for a few moments Sophie just watched her. The sound of spending Christmas with Ryan definitely sounded better than being on the receiving end of her mother’s disappointment and disgust.

***

Her get together, may have now only been a 3-person party but that would have been okay with Ryan. As much as she would have loved for Sophie to join, if she couldn’t there was still Mary and Luke. Even if she did now have a blood brother, they were her first siblings, and she was still equally as excited about starting new traditions with the two of them.

After finally clocking out of The Hold Up, she managed to drag herself up to the loft for a hot shower and hopefully a few hours of sleep. Steam filled the bathroom, fogging up the mirror while she undressed. She was so excited about next week and the night that she was coming up with for them. Neither Mary or Luke have had the best holidays in the past years, with Luke’s dad passing and Mary basically losing her entire family one by one in one way or another. Ryan felt like they all needed a fresh start and her gift to them would be making this year the best Christmas they’d ever have.

Finally stepping inside of the shower, her eyes closed as she stood under the shower head washing her day away, an image crept in her mind. A soft, beautiful image that almost made her feel like she could actually smell her scent as if she was standing right next to her. Sophie. Secretly, all she wanted for Christmas aside from spending time with her family was to be able to kiss her up under the mistletoe. Although the attraction for both of them could be seen by Ray Charles, they both had shied away from acting on it. Mainly out of fear of everything that they’d loss, adding each other to that list if they started something and didn’t work out, was nothing something that either of them wanted.

“There you are”

Mary walked into the bathroom and interrupted Ryan’s thoughts.

“Guess whose been summoned by Jacob Kane to spend Christmas with him next week.”

She leaned up against the bathroom sink talking to the silhouette of her best friend behind the shower curtain.

“How is that even possible, the man is in solitary confinement?”

He had been transferred there since he’d been getting his ass kicked daily.

“Oh never mind, of course a white cop in prison still has more liberties than most black people walking the streets. Of course, he gets to have family for the holidays.”

“Yeah somehow he’s managed get a 24 hour pass. Since Kate is officially gone for good and of course Alice would rather eat glass than see him, that leaves me.”

Ryan turned off the water and stuck her head out the shower.

“Pass me a towel please…”

Mary grabbed the large red towel and handed it to her. Ryan wrapped herself in it and stepped out.

“Are you going?”

She shrugged. She hated feeling like she was always a last resort when it came to her father. Their relationship always felt like it was set on default. Knowing if he had Kate and Beth, she wouldn’t have been a thought. But she hated the idea of him being alone because she knew how that felt and as much as he may have deserved it, like it or not, he was still her dad.

Her list was quickly dwindling and suddenly Ryan was starting to feel like this year might have turned out to be just like the others. Spent alone and wishing that wasn’t the case.

“What are your plans, are you going to spend it with the Jets?”

Mary asked as she followed her out of the bathroom. Ryan sat on the edge of the bed, adjusting her towel so she didn’t give Mary any unplanned sneak previews. She kind of felt embarrassed now planning this whole dinner when it seemed like everyone seemed to have their own plans that didn’t include her.

“Absolutely not, that’s not my family. I don’t know yet I guess...seems like I have so many options.”

Her tone was full of sarcasm. Mary’s phone blared throughout the loft.

“Let me guess, that’s Luke and he won a million dollars and he’s spending Christmas in Hawaii.”

“There’s an emergency at the clinic..”

She looked up.

“Do you need Batwoman?”

“No, I can handle this, are you okay?.”

She asked because it seemed as if she had gotten sad. 

“Yeah, just tired. Go head, we’ll talk about Christmas later.”

Mary nodded and hurried out of the loft to tend to her emergency and suddenly Ryan was engulfed in sadness. This year was supposed to be different. It was supposed to be special. She had all these amazing people in her life now and still somehow managed to end up alone. She was starting to wonder, maybe this was just how it was always going to be for her. Maybe she was just destined to have this constant feeling of loneliness and despair.

***

Christmas morning had arrived and everyone had ultimately decided to do their own thing to Ryan’s disappointment. She had decided her Christmas would consist of a visit her mom’s grave and then spend the rest of the day in the loft, watching Christmas movies and gorging on her favorite foods. She’d also gotten each one of her friends Christmas gifts, even if she couldn’t spend the day with them, she wanted each one of them to know what they meant to her.

***

“What’s that?”

Jordan asked while she waited for her sister to finish getting dressed so they could head to dinner with their mom.

“I don’t know, I found it by my door this morning when I got the paper.”

She dug into the bag and pulled out a small black box. She opened it to reveal a necklace. It was a heart inside of a ring and there was a note attached.

This symbol represents unconditional love. This is your reminder that you deserve that and so much more. You deserve love without limits, that feeds your soul and fills your heart with nothing but Joy. We started off on opposite sides but know now that we are family. I see you for the incredible , sarcastic, clever, control freak of a beautiful woman that you are. You are amazing and I wouldn’t change ANYTHING about you. Your perfect just the way you are – Ryan

She was almost moved to tears by Ryan’s words but most of all the sentiment behind her gift. Here she was willing to put herself through emotional hell just for the sake of the possibility that her mother will finally start acting like an actual mother and give her a hug and tell her that she loved her. When she had people who already loved her the way she was so desperately wanting her mother to, without limits as Ryan said.

“I can’t do this…”

Sophie turned to Jordan.

“I love you J and I appreciate what you tried to do with this but mom couldn’t even reach out to me, to invite me to dinner. You and I both know that even if she does try her best to tolerate me during dinner, that’s all it’s going to be. That’s not how I want to spend my Christmas.”

A small smirk grew on her sisters face.

“You’d much rather spend it with a certain bartender that you swear you’re just friends with?”

The admission of guilt that danced within her smile made Jordan happy. She hated the way her mother was treating Sophie and she tried her best everyday to get her to see what a mistake she was making but until she realized that fact, she was happy that she had someone that actually showed up for her in the way she needed.

“I’ll tell mom, you got busy. Go be with your girl……..friend.”

Sophie narrowed her eyes at her sister, but she pulled her into her and hugged her.

“Call me later, after your finished with mom you can come and have drinks with us.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Jordan grabbed her bag with the gift she got her mom, while Sophie gathered her things to head to the loft to thank Ryan for her gift.

***

Ryan had already left by the time Mary had awakened. She left Mary’s gift on the nightstand next to her bed. It caught her attention because the bag was so bright although it was small. She reached over and picked up the bag and retrieved the gift that awaited inside. What she pulled out was a picture frame of Mary, Ryan, Luke and Sophie. There was a note attached just like there was with Sophie’s gift.

I know you always feel you have to wonder about your place within the Kane clan, but I hope you know within this unit you are always our first choice. You’re the voice of reason within the madness. You have such a special place in all of our hearts, we wouldn’t be able to do anything this without you. We love you so much. Look at this picture whenever you have doubts about your family and know that WE always got your back. – Ryan

Instantly Mary’s lip poked out and she stared at the picture of her and her friends. It was from the do-over that she had with her speech in the living room. They were all surrounding her, hugging her and she was laughing hysterically. She was so sick of feeling like she only mattered with it was convenient for Jacob and anytime he decided he had time for her, she ran. Not this time. She wanted to spend today with those that chose her everyday.

“Ry!”

Sophie had come into the loft pulling Mary away from her gift. She got up and made her way downstairs, meeting Sophie in the kitchen.

“Where’s Ryan?”

She asked holding the gift she had.

“I don’t know, she must have left before I got up.”

Mary noticed her bag.

“Is that from her?”

“Yeah, she got me this really beautiful necklace and I wanted to thank her. I was supposed to be spending the day with my mom but after seeing this, I knew that’s not where I needed to be. She said she was going to try and do a Christmas dinner, is that still happening?”

Sophie asked to Mary’s surprised since Ryan never ended up mentioning it to her.

“She didn’t say anything to me about it, before I left last night I told her I might have been going to see my dad…I hadn’t talk to her since.”

Mary went to grab her phone to call Luke. She put him on speaker.

“Have you seen Ryan today?”

“No, I tried calling her. She left me this really cool gift. I’ve been trying to thank her before I got on the plane to go and visit my mom.”

Attention Delta flyers, flight 2384 has been delayed. No additional information is available at the moment, we will update you when we are able to….

“Hey guys, I need to find out what’s going on with my flight. Can you have Ryan call me when you talk to her?”

After Mary told him she’d have her call, they hung up the phone. Both Mary and Sophie kind of felt bad about unintentionally bailing on Ryan and the plans that she had for them all.

“I have an idea…”

Mary said before hurrying upstairs and leaving Sophie standing in the kitchen wondering what this grand idea was.

***

It must have been at least 3 hours that Ryan had spent at her mom’s grave, just talking to her and fighting back tears thinking about how much she missed her. It was starting to get windy and cold, so she decided to pack up and head to the store to pick up a few things before heading home and enjoying her Christmas for 1. She’d turn her phone off when she got to the graveyard because she hated being interrupted while she was there, so when she turned her phone back on there was a barrage of text messages from her friends.

Mary: Hurry home! It’s an emergency!

That was the last message that she had received so she didn’t even bother to look at the rest. As quickly as she could she headed home and prayed that everything was okay.

***

“Mary! What’s going on? I got your message…”

Ryan burst through the doors of the loft only to be stopped dead in her tracks. She was stunned speechless. Sophie and Mary had spent he last two hours decorating the loft with left over decorations from The Hold Up and a few things they could grab from the corner store. There were lights everywhere, ugly little Santa figurines, it even smelled like Christmas.

“What is this?”

Slowly she made her way inside as Sophie surprised her with a Santa hat.

“We both realized that we’d much rather spend today with the Bat family, Mary is cooking, we have egg nog and I went and grabbed all the corniest movies I could find at my place. I saw that on your list…”

Sophie had remembered everything she saw on Ryan’s list, so once she realized Mary’s idea was to have Ryan come back to the dinner she wanted to have, she already knew exactly what she wanted.

“Oh my god you guys, this all looks amazing….”

Mary came running down the stairs and almost lept onto Ryan hugging her.

“Merry Christmas! Thank you for my gift.”

“You’re welcome…”

She beamed before turning her attention to Sophie.

“Did you like yours?”

“I loved it, it was so beautiful, so thoughtful and just what I needed…somehow you always seem to know what that is.”

Mary caught the look they were giving each other.

“I think I hear my bed barking I’ll be back.”

She said clearly wanting to give them a moment alone.

“Come sit with me?”

Sophie proposed. Ryan nodded and followed her to the sofa. She sat down and reached for Ryan’s hand pulling her down next to her and close to her.

“I felt bad that I didn’t get you anything but then I thought about the past few months and realized I had the perfect give for you.”

There was something about the look in Sophies eyes that made Ryan slightly nervous but excited with anticipation. Sophie reached beside her and pulled out a Mistletoe and held it above Ryan’s head.

“You’re gift to me is a kiss?”

She smirked, although she definitely wasn’t going to complain.

“No, my gift to you, is me finally telling you how I feel. We’ve danced around our feelings for each other for months and I know why but I don’t want to do that dance anymore, unless it’s in your arms. I want to be with you Ryan. I want us to stop being so afraid about what we could lose and think about everything that we have become to each other and how much more we could gain if we just gave us a chance. My gift to you is my heart…if you’ll take it?”

Ryan almost felt as if she was dreaming. She literally wanted to pinch herself just to make sure she wasn’t but she knew she wasn’t.

“I want to be with you too Soph, so much.”

Ryan tilted her head up looking at the Mistletoe.

“You going to finally kiss me now, or just let your arm hang in the air?”

She teased. Sophie chuckled before she leaned in and kissed her. Months of longing had finally come to an end. Sophie tossed the mistletoe over her shoulder and allowed her hands to rest on Ryan’s waist as she pulled her in deeper in the kiss.

“Heey…. woah.”

They were interrupted by Luke walking in the front door.

“My flight was cancelled….um what’s going on here?”

He asked as Mary was coming back down the stairs.

“Hey Luke, think fast!”

Ryan had reached for the Mistletoe behind Sophie's back and tossed it at him. She threw it up high enough that he’d have to catch it high, and he ended up holding it right above Mary’s head as she reached the bottom step. Ryan just smiled.

“Don’t ever say I never gave you anything.”

She laughed amused at herself as Sophie placed another kiss to her cheek. It seemed as if her first Christmas with her Bat family turned out to be everything and more than she could have dreamed.

[rextasywrites]

i heard someone's got their requests open...... SO i dont really have much other than my thirst for smut and the total conviction that leon is a boobs man (while chris is an ass man), you can't change my mind. and its not even about size, i just know that man loves him some 🍒, big or small. anyways, im also a sucker for some angst so what about a little thing where leon and the reader broke up for whatever reason but deep down they miss each other a lot and wish they have not given up so easily, and then they sleep together... for like the first time since the break up and leon is all up on her and her 🍒 that he missee so much. just smut w a little plot lmao, thank you if you consider!! :)

This has been my favourite request so far so I had to get to it right away! i hope you enjoy it anon! <3

Warnings: smut and some angst at first

It’s been a month since Leon left. After one of the worst missions he ever had to face, he decided it was enough. If he had to face zombies and bio weapons and fuck knows what else, he’d do it alone and not risk her life too. Breaking up was the wisest decision, keeping her save. As a Kennedy, she would always have a target on her back, ready to be shot at. And if another person he loves dies because of him...Leon didn’t know if he would be able to overcome the grief and sadness.

It was two in the morning when you heard someone banging against your door. Out of reflex, you grabbed the gun he had left at your apartment months ago, ‘just in case’. Now was one of those times you thought. With an unlocked gun and in your nightgown you headed towards the door. The mysterious visitor was still banging against it, saying your name over and over again. “(Y/N), (Y/N), open up!”, you’d recognize that voice anywhere. Leon. And he sounded drunk.

You placed the gun away and unlocked the door. This caught Leon by surprise and he stumbled forwards, thanks to your great reflexes you caught him before his pretty face could kiss the hardwood floor. “Leon, the fuck you doing here?”, you asked as you helped him back on his feet. Together you headed to the living room where you sat him down on the couch, getting him a glass of water.

“I miss you baby!”, Leon hip cupped during the sentence, giving you his best puppy eyes. Fuck, not the puppy eyes…

“Leon, we broke up a month ago.”, you replied as you placed the cup of ice cold water in his hands. It still hurt, and seeing him in a state like this confirmed your belief that he wasn’t taking it easily.

Leon shrugged and took a few sips from the water, pulling a face. “That’s not wodka…”, he muttered as he placed the glass down. “Anyway. I missed you and your smell and your soft hair and your boobs and…”

You sighed and cupped his cheeks, “Leon, stop it. We broke up for a reason…”

“And that reason is stupid as fuck. I miss you.”, he confessed like the drunken mess that he is, still using his puppy eyes like you. Leon tilted his head, sticking his bottom lip out, “I miss waking up to you next to me, when you drool on your pillow and your hair is all messy an-”

You cut him off. Enough is enough. You had longed for him and his touch ever since he walked out of the door of your apartment, crying just like you did. Ever since you wanted him for yourself again, your Leon. You cut him off with a soft kiss, tasting the various liquors he had dumped into his body into the hours prior to your meeting.

“Leon…”, you whispered against his lips, the stubble of his beard scratching against your cheeks as he rubbed against you. All the feelings pent up were crashing down on you, and you both couldn’t hold back the desire burning deep inside of your bodies.

“Bedroom. Now.”, Leon said as he stood up, pulling you with him. Despite his stumbling, the muscle memory told him where your bedroom was, and in no time you two were in the bed you had shared so many times. Leon pulled you into his lap, instantly burying his face between your breasts. As a breathy moan escaped your throat, Leon tugged on your nightgown. “Off.”

To his enjoyment, your nightgown found its way to your bedroom floor, and to his delight, you weren’t wearing a bra. “Damn, how I missed them”, Leon muttered as his eyes were fixed on your breasts, taking in their shape, form, even the colour of your nipples. His calloused fingers flicked your nipples, drawing a moan from your lips. Ever since he had found out they were your weakness...Nothing had stopped him from spending literal hours between them, drawing one orgasm after the other from your body.

“You sound so fucking sweet like that...missed your cute moans, babe.”, Leon growled out as he placed one hand on your hips, guiding you to grind against him. As if it was in your blood, you moved your hips against his, feeling his rather obvious bulge against your panties. “Good girl.”, Leon flicked his tongue over your nipples, one time each, just enough to make you wish for more. Your hand dug into his shoulders, a silent beg for touch and satisfaction.

The moment Leon wrapped his lips around your nipple felt as if you were floating on cloud 7. The familiar feeling of his teeth gently biting into your soft flesh, leaving marks behind to show whose girl you are. How his beard scraped ever so slightly against your skin, tiny red traces of your connection for days to admire. He sucked and licked as if his life depended on it.

Because you were so busy with the pleasure Leon brought upon you with his mouth, you didn’t realize that he had tugged your panties to the side, only when his fingers brushed against your clit was when you gasped. Leon pulled away from your tits, a string of saliva connecting his lips to your nipple. What a sight, what a view. “Do you want this?”

“Of fucking course.”, you breathed out, and before Leon could suck on your other breast, you pulled him into another kiss, breathlessly but full of need and lust. While you kissed Leon, his fingers collected enough of your sheer endless wetness and plunged them inside of you. The stretch and calloused feeling made you feel filled up, a feeling you had longed for since Leon had last touched you. “Leon, please…”, you moaned out as he stroked over your g-spot, feeling every little bit of your inside, of the place that made you feel so good.

“Please what? Say it, little girl.”

“I want you Leon. Fuck, I need you. Now.”, and that was all Leon needed. He pulled his fingers out of your pussy, leaving you empty and whining. You wiggled your hips while he pulled down his own jeans and took off his shirt, giving you enough time to admire the beautiful man in front of you.

Leon pulled you closer once he was undressed, leaning against the wall by the bed, guiding your hips closer to his. God, he was so beautiful with his uncut cock, standing at attention just because of you. “I missed this.”, you confessed and to your surprise, Leon agreed with you before he slowly guided himself inside of you. Fuck, how you deeply you missed his. It felt as if you two were made for each other. You needed a hot second to adjust to his size, he wasn’t so big that it would hurt, but...an impressive cock was hidden in his pants.

“Fuck, little girl, you feel so good.”, Leon groaned as he started to move his hips along with your, moving as one. He rested his head on your shoulder, one arm around your waist, the other one busy with rubbing your clit. His touch alone made you see stars, and since you hadn’t masturbated since he left, your orgasm was approaching fast.

The first waves of your orgasm caught Leon by surprise, making him look up to you. “Already?”, he asked, his lips parted and swollen from all the kisses you had shared. You nodded as another wave washed over you, and Leon felt his cock twitching inside of you. So tight, so fucking good…

“Fuck, baby”, Leon moaned against your skin, pulling you into another open mouthed kiss. The taste of alcohol was fading off, replaced with his unique taste. And fuck, it was an addicting taste. Your tongues danced together as every moan was swallowed by the other party.

It didn’t take much longer for you to cum. His thick fingers, his cock made for your pussy...together you reached your peaks, panting and moaning as the orgasms came over you. As you contracted around him, Leon filled you up to the brim, the sweetest feeling of them all with your lovers cum inside of you. Your neighbours probably heard your loud moans but at this moment, you couldn’t care less. 

As Leon went soft, his cock slipped out of you, his cum dripping out. But in this very moment you felt more connected to Leon than you had ever been, and judging by his soft smile, he felt the same.

“Come on little one, lets catch some sleep?”, Leon suggested. It wasn’t even in question that he would leave. Fuck no, this bed had been his bed for so long and now came his chance to sleep in it again. You nodded and got off his lap. After quickly drying yourself up, you joined Leon under the covers, snuggling against his chest.

With a soft yawn you dozed off in your lovers arms, but you were sure you heard Leon say, “I love you and will do so forever.”

[sailorhyunjinz]

𝕴𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕷𝖔𝖘𝖙 𝕾𝖔𝖚𝖑𝖘 𝐈𝐈

© 2021 SailorHyunjinz ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 

Pairing; Bartender!Changbin x Fem!reader (she/her pronouns)

Warning ; ANGST!!! SMUT!! skz side characters, semi-slow burn, hurt/comfort, strangers to lovers, depiction of mental disorders, consumption of alcohol, tobacco use, dysfunctional families, mentions of undereating, vague hints to eating d-sorders mentions of crimes, mentions of blades, fainting, mentions of dr-g use, arguments, mentions of savior complex, mentions of childhood neglect, depiction of depression, mentions of needles, mentions of blades, yelling, mentions of hangover, parental issues (lmao cherry just say daddy issues), arguments

𝘕𝘚𝘍𝘞 ; PIV, unprotected sex, hair pulling, drooling, getting caught, masturbation, fingering, clitoral stimulation, orgasm (f). 

(fic header made by @yjeongs! thank u cora <33) 

𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 ; 10.0 k 

From one survivor to another; cheers you guys. 

O N E ｜ T W O

                        ⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ Playlist ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

Drugs N Hella Melodies - Don Toliver, Kali Uchis

Life is a Bi... - Bibi 

cigarette and condom - Bibi 

Empty Trash - LØREN 

Noir - Sunmi 

NEED - LØREN

Pretty Boy - The Neighbourhood

(hint hint look at the lyrics <33)

𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥.

𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘰𝘧 18.

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐈𝐈 ; 𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐚

Three months.

Three months of booze, questionable substances, friends and most importantly. 

Him.

Seo Changbin. 

You never knew you could feel this deep about someone, there hadn’t been a reason earlier in your life since everyone in it either used you or abused you. But you knew he was different from the first time you saw him that night in the dark room, injured and surrounded by 7 other boys that were now your closest friends. Why would anyone ever want to leave this place? There was everything! Free drinks, ear-deafening music and your boyfriend. This was heaven for a hurt soul like you, so why would anyone search for an exit in this box of traitors? 

“O-oh fuck! Changbin!” you cried out as the momentum of his thrusts made you jolt forward, hands desperately trying to grab onto the black leather of the sofa you and him had made love on countless times, the door always being unlocked since there wasn’t a lock and this damn parallel universe wasn’t gonna install one anytime soon. 

Changbin grabbed your hair, twisting it around his hand as he pounded into you from the back, the supple valleys of your ass wobbling with each movement. Your voice became frail, stuttering and moaning his name in broken syllables along many other pleas and swearwords, the way your words became incoherent the longer he fucked you made his head lull backwards, pure music to his ears unlike that shitty music that blasted through the speakers on the dancefloor that was just next to the tiny dark room that was currently filled with the scent of sex and lust. Your head was tilted up, eyes tightly shut as you clenched around Changbin’s leaking cock that was jackhammering into your wet cunt, his dick glistening with your slick every time his hips moved away from you and reflected in the minimal light of the room. He grunted as all kinds of lewd sounds were heard from you, the skin slapping against each other and the squelching noise of your pussy being filled with his cock. His hands had a tight grip on your hips, his fingers digging into your skin as the pleasure surged through every nerve of his body, sweat beading around on his temples. Your arms could barely hold you up, quivering and risking to collapse under you causing you to put your head towards the seat, warm cheek against the slightly cold leather. With your back fully arched your ass perked up, Changbin hitting exactly the right place in this position, a small stream of drool hanging from the corner of your swollen lips. You were so close to your release, hanging on by a thread to not tip over the edge and be sent spiraling down an earth shaking orgasm. 

“C-changbin, I’m gonna f-fucking cum” you stutter, reaching your hands backwards to which he let go of your hair and instead grabbed your wrists, holding you in place and pushing you down onto his cock. Your voice was no longer a whimper but instead a scream, goosebumps erupting on your soft skin as you panted, Changbin viciously thrusting inside you and being fueled by your pleasured sounds, he got off by the fact that you felt good. You were so close. So close.

“QUICK!! FELIX FUCKING FAINTED” Jisung said, bursting through the door but immedietly regretting his decision as he yelled out into the room that was now filled with your yelp and the loud club music from outside. 

“For fuck sake Jisung! Knock!” Changbin growled at the boy, you trying to grab your clothes off the floor and desperately covering yourself as Jisung stod in the doorway with panicked eyes, flailing his arms around in an anxious state. He was more appalled by seeing Felix passed out than he was seeing Changbin fucking you from behind. 

“NO TIME FOR KNOCKING, JUST FUCKING MOVE” he said, signaling his hands to follow him. In a haste you put on your clothes that weren’t much more than a skirt and a tight shirt, oh and of course your sexy panties, you had leveled up from your previous looks that made you look like a distressed mother of 4. Now you knew when you were gonna pass out and you even teleported in the phonebooth instead of injuring your head against the wall as you fainted. Changbin did the same, putting on only his pants as he ran after Jisung, you following shortly after, scared about what you were gonna witness.

The main dance floor looked like it usually did. People high, drunk or both, dancing and singing their hearts out, falling over and tumbling down on the floor. The whole place reeked of straight liquor and the music was loud enough for anyone to go deaf. You held Changbin’s hand as he dragged you through the crowd, not letting his eyes go from Jisung’s figure that was leading the both of you to the back end of the club, pushing through people and muttering small apologies that couldn’t be heard by even yourself. When you got to the end of the big place you saw Felix, his back and head against the table as he was completely knocked out, his legs dangling from the end of the rectangular table. You climbed on top of the soft seatings of the booth, putting your cheek near his nose and mouth. You didn’t hear if he was breathing but you were assured as you felt his cold breath against your hot flesh, sighing in relief. 

“How is he?!” Jisung yelled, “is he dying?”

You shook your head, grabbing his limp wrist and putting your pointer and middle finger on the underside of his limb, his veins not visible in the dark lighting of the club. His pulse was stable, beating faintly. 

“He’ll be alright!” you yelled back, the concerned gazes of the other boys standing around the boy exhaling as they heard your words, Changbin going closer to Felix and putting his hand on his shoulder, shaking the boy and repeating his name over and over again but to no avail. Seungmin rubbed the palm of his hand against his exposed forehead as his hair was pushed back.

“I’ll stay here with him, Changbin fetch me a water bottle and,,, wait,,, why did he even faint in the first place?” he asked, the boys looking at each other until they landed on Jisung that looked distressed, his pinkish lips quivering. 

“Probably a nice concoction of no food and only alcohol” he said, peering down at his black boots, his hair flopping onto his face, too shy to meet the gazes of his friends as if he had done something wrong himself. Seungmin could only sigh, you patting Jisung on the back as you walked through the jumping crowd again, the song changing as you heard Seungmin say “get him something Changbin”, their voices fading into the beat as you walked with Jisung behind you. 

Jisung slammed the door as you two were back in the room that had only moments earlier been filled with helpless whimpers and pleas. You threw yourself on the wrinkly couch, looking away in shyness when remembering that Jisung had caught the two of you even if everyone knew that you guys fucked in that very same room whenever there was time and Changbin wasn’t standing in the bar. The young boy sat down on the dark floor, leaning his elbow against the seat of the sofa as his twinkling eyes met yours. 

“I,,, just don’t understand” he said, you tilting your head in wonder as he uttered those words.

“Don’t understand what Sungie?” you said, the walls almost vibrating from the bass of the song from outside. He sighed as he momentarily looked away from you. 

“Felix,,, like it’s so clear that he needs help, just over the last few months his cheeks have sunken in and his eyes are completely matte and lifeless” he said, his voice trembling as a lump of tears was stuck in his throat. 

“But aren’t you the same Jisung? You need help too, help to stop thinking that everyone is your responsibility. I understand that you want to help him,,, but you carrying everyone's emotional baggage has landed you here. Felix will get help by those that are capable of getting him that help, you aren’t Jisung.”

His eyes shot up at you, dark as his eyebrows furrowed, his jaw clenching in anger. He felt attacked, commenting on his actions usually made him feel offended. 

“I am capable of helping him. What about you then huh? You can’t even help your own boyfriend” he snarked, running his hand over his hair in frustration. You rolled your eyes at him, watching him as he bit the inside of his cheek. He needed to do that, he couldn’t tell you the fact that one day your boyfriend is just gonna disappear since he’s actually taking matters into his own hands and getting help. 

“Don’t say that Jisung, we both try our best,,, let’s not fight over something we can’t control” you say, your voice getting frail by the end of the sentence.

“Can’t control? We can, we can help each other!” he said, banging the palm of his hand against the warm leather of the couch, making you jump in fear. You dropped down on your knees, your eyes being on the same level as his as you looked at him, the young boy diverting his gaze immediately.

“Jisung, look at me.” You grabbed his other hand that was resting in his lap against the rough material of his jeans. “We try, that’s the best we can do. Change comes from within. Nobody can save us if we don’t save ourselves.” Jisung sighed loudly, swallowing harshly, the both of you flinching when somebody burst through the black door. Changbin was carrying Felix on his back, the male still passed out on his broad shoulders. Your boyfriend looked puzzled at the scene before him. His girlfriend holding hands with one of his closest friends, sitting close enough to feel his breath against her cheek, both looking like two helpless deers caught in headlights. He furrowed his eyebrows as he walked into the room, throwing Felix off his shoulder and positioning him into a semi-prone position in order to open the airways. You and Jisung stood up, looking at the blonde boy and how his eyelashes layed gently against his lower eyelid. Changbin looked at Felix for a while before turning to you with a serious expression. 

“So,,, what happened here?” he said to which you shrugged.

���Me and Jisung just talked,,, about Felix” you answered, Changbin uttering a little “oh” as his previous rather unfaithful suspicions were proven to be false. “There’s no need to worry, he’s breathing so he won’t be in any medical danger as of right now but somebody needs to keep an eye on him,,, in case something changes.” You smiled at him talking.

“Alright doctor Changbin” you said while giggling, hugging him and him wrapping his sturdy arms around you, looking at Jisung’s mellow expression, eyes brimming with tears as he sat down on his knees on the floor once again, pushing a lock of hair from Felix’s delicate face, cupping his cheek that was once plump but now gaunt. Changbin pulled away from your comforting embrace and patted Jisung on the shoulder, bending his knees to get closer to him. 

“Do you wanna keep an eye on him, Ji?” he asked to which the boy nodded, not answering with words, not even a gaze at the male that was talking to him. He turned around to look at you, pointing his chin towards the door, signaling for the two of you to get out and leave the two boys alone to which you nodded, following Changbin out and gently closing the door behind you by turning the knob and releasing it slowly. The music got louder and louder as you two walked in the long corridor before ending up on the main floor, the corridor going to the bar and you could only get onto the dance floor by exciting through the wooden gate of the bar. 

“I’ll go find the others, you should work!!” you yelled through the music and Changbin nodded, giving you a kiss on the lips before you exited through the gate, being careful to knock any of the liquor bottles on the walls over and causing a ruckus like you’d done once before, being black-out drunk and trying to hobble your way through to god knows where, accidentally swinging your arms towards the shelfs. Luckily everything restores itself in this universe.

People were doing their usual activities in all corners of the club, making out against a wall or jumping, spilling their drinks on the floor that Changbin would have to mop up afterwards when he steps in the sticky liquid that pressed up against ones shoe. It was impossible to see who was who in the dark room, the neon lights on the roof changing colors but not making it easier for you, especially not with the commotion around you, individuals bumping into each other. In the distance you saw a hand waving, a familiar hand that was decked out in maybe a thousand silver rings, all with intricate designs that could only be seen from up close. Next thing you see is Hyunjin jumping, the bedazzled hand belonging to the long haired blonde male that always made sure to use the most expensive perfume. You made your way over to him, the male smiling brightly as he sat down on the edge of the cubical sofa, the other males being around the table that Felix was lying unconscious on just a brief moment earlier. The table was filled with half empty beer bottles along with red glimmering packs of cigarettes that belonged to some of them. Hyunjin patted the seat next to him, scooting closer to Jeongin that was ruffling his slightly sweaty hair, putting the bottle green top against his lip and taking a sip, his adam's apple moving as he swallowed. 

Hyunjin was different, different from anyone else in this place. You’d expect him to have the best life imaginable due to his family background. His father was the CEO of an influential business and his mother being his fathers assistant, both living a lavish life and providing for their only son, Hyunjin. But no amount of wealth can buy happiness. You don’t know the entire story but what you have heard when he was drunk and barely able to speak is that he was bullied all throughout school, struggling with the pressure being put on him by his parents to become a businessman just like his father. It ate Hyunjin alive to everyday go to sleep and feel like a failure that wasn’t able to live up to his parents expectations. He wasn’t worth this lifestyle he thought as he mindlessly doodled on the edge of his college application papers, it was easier to end it. He felt like a coward, always taking the easy way out but that’s how he’d lived his entire life. Getting help wasn’t an option, it would bring shame upon the family if anyone found out that he went to therapy and besides, his family didn’t believe in mental illnesses, it was simply to “go on a run” to feel better. “Then why the fuck am I not feeling better? I’ve ran miles but my mind runs faster” he wrote in the small black notebook he kept in his bedside table, hiding it together with his cigarettes under piles of papers and books. That’s how he ended up here, being together in a little group consisting of Chan and Minho along with some other people that had already departed from the place he felt the safest. 

You gave a smile to Hyunjin, grabbing the beer bottle in front of him, earning a little “hey!” from him but you drank it anyway as you laughed at his reaction, the bitterness spreading throughout your mouth. You exhaled, putting the bottle down harshly, the loud sound being drowned out by the music. Hyunjin laughed along with you, he seemed kinda distant, his pupils dilated. With furrowed eyebrows you looked at the other boys that looked back at you in a confused manner. 

“Something wrong y/n?” Seungmin asked, his cheeks slightly red from the heat that was radiating off everybody in the room, the tension heightening the temperature. Your eyes landed on Minho who looked equally as dazed as Hyunjin, looking up at the ceiling as the crown of his head rested against the dark walls in an uncomfortable manner. 

“You guys definitely did something” you said to which Hyunjin laughed, now stealing Minho’s drink since he was completely immersed at how the colors changed. 

“Of course we did,,, if we were gonna do it, why not here?” he said, looking at you through hooded eyes, his gaze sharp as pin needles, the black smudged eyeliner around his eyes not making it easier to escape the way you drowned in them. It was true, here was the place where you could be yourself, do whatever you pleased and act reckless as long as you didn’t hurt anybody, a rule Minho found difficult. It’s not that he wanted to hurt people, it’s just that he couldn’t help himself. Something bad was gonna happen if he didn’t. So that’s what the switchblade was for, not to hurt anyone but just in case he needed to add another felony to his list. You didn’t even wanna know what substances that ran through his veins but you felt bad for him. He was a slave to his own thoughts, sometimes even his own actions. He had no other choice but to obey them, do everything that the voices whispered faintly into his ear, a serenade of revenge to everyone that has never believed in him, considered him a shame and neglected him. No, not him. His inner child. 

Seungmin grabbed the red carton of cigarettes, the crimson wrapper unfolding itself when he opened the lid and grabbed one of the deathsticks whose orange ends were looking up at him. He picked one up, putting it to his lips and patting down his sides in search for a lighter but to no avail. He sighed out of the corner of his mouth, gesturing towards Hyunjin by flicking his pointer finger upwards, the blonde boy reaching over to his pocket and retrieving a white lighter that he put on the glossy mahogany table and scooted across it, Seungmin grabbing it as it nearly fell to his feet. He thanked Hyunjin by lazily saluting with two fingers before igniting the cigarette, the deep purple fading out into a light orange at the tip of the flame, the smoke evaporating around Seungmin as he puffed, exhaling straight ahead of him, poor Jeongin beside him coughing. 

“What’s even the purpose of these?” Jeongin said, grabbing the packet and examining it closely, twisting and turning the small box.

“What’s the purpose of your life?” Seungmin answered with an evil laugh, you wanting to bend over the table and smack him across the face for talking like that to the youngest. Jeongin shrugged his shoulders, smirking at Seungmin.

“Touchè I guess” he said, a smile hiding his pain. “Can I get one?” he said as he nudged Seungmin on the shoulder, the boy already taking his second puff. Seungmin didn’t answer, simply placing the cigarettes and Hyunjin’s white lighter in front of him. You stared at Seungmin in disbelief for a moment before throwing yourself over Hyunjin’s lap, grabbing the two objects and clutching them tightly in your hand. Hyunjin flinched at the sudden commotion, all the boy’s eyes were on you, tilting their heads like confused puppies. 

“Don’t you even dare Yang Jeongin” you said, him looking at you with twinkling innocent eyes. He nodded and you turned your head back to Seungmin. “And you, no actually all of you, quit it” you said, a moment of silence flew by before all of them bursted out in laughter.

“fucking,,, tell that to your boyfriend first” Minho said, him finally awake from his trance “if you manage to get him to stop then we’re all with you y/n” he said, laughing, his two front teeth poking out like a rabbit. You sighed, looking at the four boys but noticing Chan was missing. 

“Where’s Chan?” you asked, Seungmin shrugging as he exhaled grey smoke again.

“He hasn’t arrived yet,, don’t know what he’s up to” he answered, putting the orange end to his plump lips, pink in color but this being impossible to see in the changing neon lighting. “I wonder how Lixie is doing,,,” he added with a sigh. Good you hoped, the last three months have been nothing but a downward spiral to hell for the boy, everyday the gleam from his eyes got duller and duller until they were matte with fatigue. You remember a distinct moment that happened in the first couple of weeks in the club, you still getting to know the peculiar characters that moved around in this place. Felix was sitting in the bar, you sitting right next to him, the whole conversation was difficult to hear due to the music and chatter from people but you guys made do. 

“You know that song? By Radiohead?” he said. You shrugged and shook your head.

“Which one?” you asked, taking a sip from your drink that was unfortunately made by another bartender, Changbin not being there yet. 

“That one where they sing ‘I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul’” he said with a giggle, grabbing his glass and taking a swig of the poison in his glass, decorated with lemons and limes. You laughed with him, not knowing what he meant, thinking he was just spewing random words at you from being intoxicated. 

“Yeah, what about it?” you said, the young boy’s smile fading away as he gulped, placing down the drink. 

“I don’t know,,, I often listen to it on the bus or home alone,,, it tells me something but I can’t place my finger on what exactly” he said with a loud sigh, resting his cheek on his hand that was bent against the dark wooden bar. 

“Isn’t it the lyrics?” you said, “the fact that you want to be perfect in every way?” Felix hummed for a minute before nodding his head slowly. 

“It’s not even that I want to be perfect because that’s what society taught me,,, it’s because I live in a false reality where I believe that people will love me and appreciate me more if i tweak everything” he blurted out, going silent and sipping his drink slowly. 

“I’m happy that you know that it’s false but,,, what’s stopping you?” you asked, looking at the boy whose eyes were gazing at the wooden stick inside his drink, stirring it over and over again. 

“Because,,, if I stop,,, I won’t be sick enough” 

The both of you got silent after he remarked those words. Felix got silent because he thought he’d said something wrong. You got silent because you knew how that felt, that someone was going through your struggles. 

“You don’t prove anything by that Felix. I k-know this is gonna sound stupid and you’ve heard it so many times but,,, just know that I love you no matter how you look. I’m happy that you’re here Lixie” 

You looked at him and his dark brown eyes met yours, glittering once again, rounded as if he’d heard the best news of his life. He opened his arms and you stood up on the floor, hugging him and squeezing him by the sides.

“I’m happy that you are here too y/n” he whispered in your ear, barely audible from the loud bumping of the music. You pulled off the hug and shimmied up the bar stool again, putting the transparent glass edge to your lips and feeling the liquor trickle down your throat. 

“I was thinking of getting those words tattooed on me but now that I think about it, I want those words tattooed on me but with a big red x over it.” You smiled together with him, his dimples being carved into those freckled cheeks along with his bleak eyeshadow, his lips a cherry tint. 

“You should.”

“Oh fuck-” you cursed as you woke up on your living room floor that was covered in dust and crumbs that was a trail all the way to the kitchen. You sighed every time you were back in reality, in the cursed world that wanted nothing else but to crush you under its fingertips. A patter was heard from outside, gentle raindrops decorating your windows as they were falling from the dusky skies. The rain was at least better you thought, in the sun you felt immense guilt for not being as happy as everyone around you, scrolling through your phone and seeing pictures of old classmates on trips and drinking out in the basking sun, wearing sundresses and hats. Being picturesque.

You made your own fun. Late wine nights and therapy appointments early in the morning where you get drilled with information that you could actually use to get better but you decide to cancel it all out. It was impossible to take in. Or maybe you wanted this now? Like Felix said, you wanted to remain sick enough even if there is no such thing. It used to be about not wanting to leave your comfort zone as odd as it sounds. You had struggled with your mental health for as long as you could remember and getting better would mean that you would have to make active changes in your life that at the moment didn’t seem appealing. But now it wasn’t about that. It was about Changbin. Getting better would mean that you would have to leave him, not only him but all the other friends you made at the club for the last months. They felt closer than family especially since you’d barely had one in the past. You wanted to stay by Changbin for forever but did you want to suffer for just as long?

Little did you know, Changbin didn’t. 

You stood up from the wooden floorboards, stepping closer to the balcony door and seeing the rain cover the streets, lonesome people walking with umbrellas and rain jackets through the storm, probably on their way home to a delicious home cooked meal, a comfortable bed and a stable mind. You only had one of those things but you, in contrast from before the club, didn’t get jealous when you saw those people down at the rainy street. You had your own happiness that was Changbin.

Every time you said his name your heart started racing, your knees almost bent underneath you as you walked back to the couch, no lights turned on in the entire odorous apartment. With a thump you fell with your back against the comforting material, once again being swallowed by a fort of pillows and clothes that you haven’t been bothered to put away. The tv display stood blank, your silhouette reflecting in the matte sheen of the screen, your face almost hanging low with boredom. What was there to do when you weren’t in Changbin’s secure arms? 

It was as if his name rolled off your tongue. Smooth as butter, sweet as syrup. You closed your eyes, eyelashes fluttering against your cheek, tickling the sensitive skin on your face. Underneath your lids pictures flashed by in bright colors, not from imagination but from memory. The pictures radiated their energy through your entire body, sending shivers down to the tips of your toes as you saw the faces of your best friends and boyfriend, their smiles creating red apples on their cheeks. 

You wondered how many of those smiles were fake. 

A wave of arousal shot through your body as remembered the events that took place before Jisung had a chance to ruin them, how Changbin grunted next to your ear, his hot breath teasing the shell of your ear as he whispered, the movements of his hips going from rolling to pounding, the room filling with the lewd noises of skin slapping against each other accompanied with your tiny whimpers, pleading him to make you cum. You couldn’t help but to rub your legs together, shifting in the grey sofa that was decorating your trash pile of a living room, the other decor pieces being empty bottles and white used tissues that were tiny houses to your tears. You peeked down quickly, seeing that you were still in your party clothes that consisted of a shirt and a short skirt that was sitting kinda lopsided on the base of your hips, hugging your skin tightly. With a rapid hand you removed the garment by unzipping it by the side, kicking the fabric towards the end of the couch with your feet that were bare, you managed to toss your sneakers away whilst you were deep in your imaginations. Except for the bright colors in your mind, the rest of the apartment was dark, not a single light being switched on. Your light source for many of your lonesome nights were the grey poles on which a bulbous light hung, a so-called street light. The blue cold light shone inside, deep dark shadows being casted on the walls by the trees that decorated the sidewalk. 

Lines started to blur between the real and the fake, not sure if you actually felt Changbin’s hands wrapped around your neck or if it was just yet another illusion your mind has decided to put forward. You could feel the warmth from his hands surging down your neck, soothing your heart in a comforting way. It was as if you were being held in a way that made your blood run south, loved and aroused at the same time. It was as if a ball of warmth bubbled inside you, encapsulating you in its aura of happiness and distraction, your hand teasing the the skin on your lower abdomen before it plunged beneath the small pair of cotton panties that had been violently pulled off by your boyfriend some time ago, exactly how much was something you couldn’t tell, the universe simply didn’t allow time. 

Time is an arrow. 

It always goes forward. 

Under the thin elastic your fingers started moving on their own, like they knew what to do, almost imitating what Changbin had done so many nights prior to this one on that murky couch. You couldn’t help but to wonder if he missed you right this moment. Was was he doing? What was he thinking? You wondered if he thought about you whenever he pleasured himself, if it was your name that echoed in the four empty walls of his broken down apartment whenever he came. The thought of his hand wrapped around his cock as he groaned made you sweat, the skin on the underside your knees sticking to each other as your knees were bent, soles flat against the frowning sofa. Automatically you spread your legs, one resting against the wallpapered surface as the other one hung out from the edge of the sofa. With your middle finger you felt the slippery surface, gathering your slick as you swiped up your finger, coating the sensitive bud in stickiness. You clenched around nothing, thinking about how Changbin whispered his praises in a sweet tone like a serenade.

“You’re doing so well y/n, fuck,,, you’re so pretty princess”

You nodded despite there being no one to see, small whimpers forcing their way out of your throat as two fingers circled your clit, spreading one pussy lip with a third finger, widening the area of contact. Your spine arched at anticipation, a faraway feeling approaching with quick strides as you squirmed your hips, butt digging into couch cushions as your gently pinched your slick-covered clit. Your hole was practically begging for more, velvety walls throbbing for pleasure that you didn’t mind giving, slowly inserting your middle finger, followed by a second finger, hissing at the initial stretch and getting used to the feeling, wiggling your fingers inside just like Changbin always does but his fingers filled you up better accompanied by the small marks he left all over your torso and tits, sucking on your delicate nipples with his wet tongue, leaving a trail of saliva as he licked around the valley of your tits, the ticklish feeling causing you to throw your head back. 

“f-faster binnie” you said into thin air, there being no one to answer your request except your fingers that started going faster in and out of your squelching hole, using your thumb to nudge on your clit, desperately trying to move it in circles and moaning as pleasure built up in the pit of your core. You licked your lips, coating them in a thin sheen of spit, imagining his soft lips pressing up against yours, his tongue coaxing yours as he licked your bottom lip, nibbling on it before slipping it into your mouth, the soft surface meeting yours, a languid kiss being exchanged as he panted into the kiss, you whining gently in between breaths. Your hair stood in a mess as you rubbed your head against the fluffy pillow under you, a couple of stray pieces sticking to your forehead that was covered in a lustre of sweat, reflecting in the small amount of light that was looming in the room together with you. Your mind blurred with lewd scenes with him, curving your fingers inside you in order to reach your g-spot and being startled by your own moan when you did, it simply felt too good, especially when thinking that it was his fingers that plunged into your wetness. 

“Just a little bit more y/n,, o-oh shit,,, f-fuck i’m gonna cum”

His voice ringed in your ears, it didn’t have to be loud to be memorable and make your head spin with pure amativeness. Your fingers started to hurt from how vigorously you were pumping them inside yourself, bringing yourself to the edge as you imagined that it was Changbin’s cock, twitching and begging from release, wishing he would cum inside you and paint your walls in his milky white cum, the hot liquid oozing out of your swollen pussy. Your clit throbbed, your breathing getting uneven between your parted lips, your hand being slightly restricted by the fabric of your underwear. 

“Cum for me baby”

It was an automatic response. Your hips convulsing upwards, high-pitched moans bouncing off the walls as you continued to tease your clit, pulling out your fingers and rubbed the swollen bud up and down into overstimulation until you it hurt, your eyes tightly squeezed, small droplets of tears teasing the corners of your shut orbs. The high washed over you, from the crown of your head to the tips of your toes, every body part rushing with adrenaline before coming down in a state of repose. Slowly you withdrew your hand from beneath the fabric, the elastic snapping gently against your skin, fingertips glistening with your juicy release that now also coated your panties as it rubbed against the inside fabric. You slowly opened your eyes, vision blurry before focusing correctly, seeing nothing but darkness and vague outlines of objects. Night had fallen. You sighed, you were alone.A part of you wished at Changbin had been there whenever your glittering doe-eyes sprung open, your plushy lips being met with his but alas you couldn’t get everything in life.

Except that you couldn’t even get anything. At all.

“Binnie!!!” you shouted as soon as you opened your eyes as you woke up on the floor, looking around confused as your voice echoed in the room. You rubbed your eyes, the familiar automated voice and its words still stuck in your head.

“Uh? Over here y/n”

You heard his voice, the sweet tune hitting your eardrums, you looked at the direction of the sound and noticed that you were lying on the main dance floor. No music. No people. You stood up with wobbly knees, looking around and being shone on by a spotlight on the ceiling, watching Changbin drying off a couple of glasses with a kitchen towel, a brown apron sitting snugly around his waist, another piece of useless fabric that hid his well-sculpted body. 

“W-why is there no one here? Are we glitching again?!” your voice panicked as your gaze was busy, landing everywhere from the meaningless neon green exit sign pointing to nowhere to the colorful transparent liquor bottles on the shelves behind your lover. Changbin let out a little snark as he put the glass down, throwing the cloth over his shoulder and leaning on the wooden bar counter.

“No y/n, sometimes many people are busy and that’s when you don’t teleport here,,, you know that already”

You let out a small “oh” in realization before walking over to the bar and throwing yourself into a chair lazily, tapping the table with your pointer finger twice, a quiet signal for help. The kind that alcohol provided. Changbin didn’t say anything, simply scooping some ice into a low glass with pretty carved out details at the bottom, the black haired boy filling up the glass with whiskey, the brown liquid seeping between the cubes of frozen water. It was oddly silent in the club, not from the fact that there wasn’t anyone else there but there was this awkward feeling between the two of you, as cold as the ice cubes that the champagne bottles were resting inside a iron bucket full of ice underneath the bar on one of the shelves. 

“So uhm,,, was everything alright yesterday?” he asked in a low voice, peering at you through hooded eyelids as he tilted the glass, pouring another liquor bottle and pouring the substance in. 

Memories of the night prior flashed past your eyelids causing you to almost choke on your saliva. Changbin looked at you suspiciously, furrowing his eyebrows as he put the glass on the coaster in front of you, watching you gulp down the poison. He had something on his mind, the words were basically danging off his pink lips but he hesitated, something stopped him every time he tried to open his jaw and let the words pour out in a puddle of word-vomit on the floor. The words were lodged in his throat like a boulder, he didn’t know how to say it.

“Something wrong binnie?” you asked with a confused expression, your eyes filled with concerned. What if something had happened in a universe you couldn’t even reach, the boy wandering alone with his concerns? 

You took another sip from the glass, frowning as the alcohol stung your tongue and descended down your esophagus like a ball of fire, observing the contents that you were drinking partly because you were interested in what concoction your boyfriend had made but mostly cause you didn’t want to look him in the eyes in this frigid atmosphere. He shook his head, giving you a non-verbal answer. 

You didn’t believe him. 

By the way his jaw clenched to the awkward posture as he stared at you, he had something to confess and you weren’t sure if you were ready for it, thinking that maybe it would be easier to not ask about it anymore and live in oblivion. 

“Come on~ I know you well enough to know that something isn’t quite right” you said, resting your chin in the palm of your hand, eyeing your boyfriends godly figure, practically drooling over him on the spot. 

“Hmm,,, y-yeah ok,, I do have something to say but,,, I’m not sure how to” he started, your heart starting to beat faster with each syllable he pronounced, thinking that this was the end of your world because he was indeed your entire world. The reason you still smiled.

“Just say it baby, I won’t be angry” you said but not sure if you could keep your promise. 

“I got a place at rehab” 

You started laughing sarcastically, the boy standing perplexed behind the counter. 

“Wh-what’s so funny?” he asked shortly after. 

“You obviously said no, right?”

Silence erupted throughout the establishment, your smile was wiped off your face as you waited for an answer but you felt the tears start bubbling up in your glossy eyes as the silence went on, brimming and coaxing to fall down onto your warm cheek, his expression was blank, a canvas without a paint. In a rage of fit you threw your glass at the nearest wall, the glass shattering in a million pieces just like your heart, impossible to glue together. 

The ice cubes melted on the floor, liquid splattered on the dark glossy floor. There was no saving the broken pieces, it was simply to throw it in the trash. You couldn’t blame Changbin for being startled, backing to the wall that displayed the bottles of alcohol, small lights above them causing the flasks to reflect tiny fractals.

“What the fuck do you mean Changbin, huh?!” you yelled at him, salty tears streaming down your cheeks, hanging off your quivering lips. He could only exhale loudly from his nose, his dusky complexion losing its color the more stressed he got. 

“No, what do you mean? Are you actually serious about letting me rot in my life and not take help when I’ve finally gotten it?” he said, his tone growing louder with each word, him practically growling like a feral wolf. You couldn’t believe the word coming out of his lying mouth. Rot in his life? Why? He had you now. You were all he needed, right?

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier then?” Your voice was expressionless, a string tinted red with betrayal laced in your tone. 

“I was scared.”You scoffed, feeling the frustration in the pit of your stomach like a heavy weight, tears glittering in the bright lights that were on currently, shining down on you as if another dimension had opened. 

One without Changbin. 

With dark eyes you looked at him, a dumbfounded smile causing the corners of your lips to turn upwards, tasting the salt of your sadness as a droplet rolled down and into your mouth. “

I never want to see you again Changbin”

“Don’t say that y/n, p-please don’t say that.” 

His voice was drowsy like he hadn’t slept in days, your theory being more believable as you saw the dark bags under his blank eyes. He had been worrying, worried for your reaction. He took off the apron and put the kitchen towel on the nearest surface before hurrying to exit out through the gate and took strides towards your standing figure but you distanced yourself every time he got closer. You felt yourself getting smaller and smaller as his shadow towered over you, his face not showing compassion but rather irritation. 

“GET AWAY!!” you screamed in a ear-deafening screech, him barely flinching as he had seen worse things in his life than his heartbroken girlfriend getting pressed up against a wall with dark streaks of makeup and tears staining her face, plagued by treachery that was brought upon by the only one she trusted in her life.

Maybe this was deeper than just your boyfriend leaving you. Maybe this was a silent cry to stay and not leave like your father once did. Sure, he was around in your childhood but that’s the thing; he was around, never actively invested in what happened in the life of his child. You didn’t like to look into it. Hell, you barely wanted to talk about it but you couldn’t help but to wonder if that was the reason as to why you had a difficult time with goodbyes. It replayed memories, memories you’d rather forget. Or wish you never had in the first place. 

“The fuck-” said a recognazible voice that belonged to Minho, the male staggering out of the toilets in a hungover haze, scratching his hair as he yawned.

“Huh,,, how long have you been there?” Changbin said, him turning his head to look at Minho whilst standing mere inches from you, sandwiching you between his body and the dark walls. 

“I have no idea,,, just woke up and heard a scream” he replied lazily, still not really registering the situation that was unfolding in front of his very own eyes. You glared at Changbin before pushing him by the shoulders, thinking you would make a big impact but him only losing his balance for a few seconds, with fierce steps you bolted to Minho, the boy sliding his hand down into his pocket the closer you got causing you to stop dead in the tracks. 

You’d rather be heartbroken than deceased. 

“Did you know about this? Did you know that this motherfucker was going to fucking rehab?!” you yelled hysterically towards the boy that picked up a packet of cigarettes instead of a switchblade. He smirked as he put a cigarette in the corner of his mouth, not breaking eye contact with you for a second throughout the entire process, almost hypnotizing you with his looks. 

“Yeah,,, we all knew” that devilish smirk only signaling that he liked the pain he saw in other people, the white lighter in his hands flicking and emitting an orange and purple flame that slowly burned the tip of the deadly stick. 

You wanted to scream on the top of your lungs, break every single one of the bottles on the shelves in a fit of rage before breaking Changbin’s heart, shatter it in pieces and step on it like glass even if it would make shards stick to your wounded and bloody feet. But that’s life. You can never hurt someone without getting hurt back. 

“And so you all decided to be on his side? To defend a liar was the best your stupid fucking head could come up with?” you couldn’t even filter your words, whatever came to your mind rolled off your tongue as smoothly as the words “i love you” once had. 

“Hey y/n! Don’t say that! He had nothing to do with it” Changbin roared, stepping closer with his heavy black boots that could probably smash someone against the concrete by the telephone booth where thousands of stray souls wandered every hour of the short 24 hours we humans have in a day. He put his hand on your arm but you shoved him away, freeing your hand from his grasp and yelling inaudible words at the boy. 

“And that’s why you don’t date a psycho, am I right Changbin?” Minho laughed, lodging the cigarette between his pointer- and middle finger, blowing the smoke towards you as a careless gesture. Changbin looked done, rolling his eyes at the other boy before shaking his head, his hair bouncing in a fluffy manner as he moved. 

“Not now Min” he answered simply, keeping his composure but you on the other hand were boiling with anger, feeling your heartbeat in your ears. You let out a half laughter filled with sarcasm.

“Somehow the real psycho has the audacity to say that to me, huh? Who the fuck do you guys think you are? You guys think it’s cool to live like this?” you said, your voice becoming frail at the end of your sentence, breaking as new tears weighed on your eyelashes and dropped down on the floor beneath you. 

“No we don’t y/n and that’s why Changbin is getting help. Don’t you see it? You are hurting him by keeping him here.”

Minho’s words stung more than a thousand needles piercing through your raw flesh. 

He was right.

The entire relationship rested on a foundation of suffering that you fed with repeatedly withdrawing from help that could make you blossom into the person you once were. Deep down you knew that this relationship was impossible, you knew it before you even fell for him but the thing is that you didn’t choose to fall in love, it happens. There’s a reason as to why it’s called ‘falling in love’, because once you’ve jumped you can’t expect to stand on the top of the cliff again. Only at the view from halfway down do you realize that maybe this wasn’t the right time and space. 

You looked at Changbin that held his hands out, wanting to hug you and make everything feel alright, like it was before and you couldn’t help but to melt at how his eyes rounded, twinkling by the thousands of lights around the room and reflecting in his teary eyes. With the arm of your sleeve you wiped off the tears, makeup rubbing off on the fabric but you couldn’t give less of a thought before Changbin wrapped his hands around you, tears falling at a rapid pace as you sobbed into the neck of your boyfriend, breathing in his musky scent that infiltrated your bloodstream and made your heart stop for just a brief moment before pounding harder than before, powered by longing. 

“I’m s-sorry Changbin” you said in between sobs, words coming out in broken syllables, it was difficult forming a sentence let alone an apology. Changbin shook his head as he put his hand on the back of your neck, descending down and rubbing your back soothingly.

“Don’t apologize y/n, you didn’t do anything wrong” His voice ran down your spine, the boy pulling away from the hug and holding you by the shoulders, looking deeply into your eyes as he spoke. 

“I love you and I will never forget you”

You nodded, your face in distress with tears and snot, puffy eyes looking back at him. 

“W-when are you leaving t-then?” you asked timidly to which Changbin responded by breaking eye contact.

“In two days.” You sighed, not sure if you should be sad. What kind of partner tells you that important of an announcement just two days prior? But you understood, he was just as scared as you. 

Scared of the unknown. Alcohol had been a part of his life for a long time, it was his comfort and now suddenly he needed to adapt to a life without it, a life in sobriety. You weren’t the only scared one. The both of you heard Minho picking up the shards of glass with his bare hands, throwing it in the trash as he smoked, not even needing to remove the cigarette from between his lips in order to exhale the smoke, grey clouds billowing out of the corner of his mouth and filling the area with the scent of over 70 harmful substances. 

In the distance you heard footsteps coming from the dark room that was pretty much the only private space in the building, Felix and Jisung walking out, their expressions changing from happy to confused upon seeing your face and Minho cleaning up. 

“W-what,,,” Jisung started but Minho put his pointer finger to his lips before removing the cigarette from his lips and mouthing to the younger boys.

“He told her”

Both Jisung and Felix nodded slowly, their eyes big as saucers as they mouthed a small “oh” back before casting a glance at the two of you, two bodies melting in a touch that could be the last one.

“What will I do without you Changbin?” you said, looking down at the ground. He sighed before smiling at you. 

“What you’ve always done y/n,,, fight for yourself because one day you will make it” he said, cupping your cheek in his hand and swiping his thumb across the tears on your cheek, the dampness remaining on the rough pads of his thumb. 

“B-but don’t worry y/n! It’s in two days,,, maybe I’ll be back tomorrow” he said, you seeing that the boys nodded their heads in the corners of your eyes. 

“Alright,,, I’ll trust you,,, I always do”

“You guys can go and I don’t know,,, talk in that other room,,, we’ll take care of stuff out here” Minho said, flicking the ashes off the end of the cigarette one last time before throwing it in the sink, the boy standing in the bar together with the the other two boys. You and Changbin nodded, making your way past them and entering the dark room that had now become a place where only memories live. With hesitance you sat down on the couch, Changbin doing the same. You glanced over at him, slowly tilting your head against his shoulder and exhaling loudly through your nose. 

The momentary silence wasn’t awkward. It was comforting. 

Silence was what this place needed, moments away from everything related to partying and drinking until your liver failed. 

“Do you remember the first time we met?” he said with a laugh, you giggling with him.

“Of course I do, it wasn’t even that long ago but,,, it feels like forever.” 

He nodded, glancing at your hand for a moment before grabbing it, his warm hand wrapping around your cold one, lacing his fingers with yours. 

“I don’t want you to leave binnie,,, t-this is unfair.” Tears started bubbling up in your throat again, your breathing getting unstable as your gaze was fixed on the ground. 

“I don’t want to leave either y/n but,,, what if we meet in the right dimension? What if that’s what happens? That when you,,, start loving yourself for who you are,,, maybe that’s when you meet the one that will continue to heal you?”

Changbin’s words made a lot of sense. Nobody knew what happened to the people that descended to the real world again. What adventures they were on or who they were loving at this point in time so maybe that did happen. It made you smile, your heart filled with hope, something you hadn’t felt since he said those doomed words earlier. You turned to him, his lips lingering dangerously close to yours to the point where you could feel his hot breath brushing up against the apples of your cheeks. He leaned in, attaching his lips on yours one last time, pushing a piece of hair behind your ear and holding you by the back of your neck, his thumb caressing the knuckles of your hand. You kissed him back, slipping your tongue into his mouth in a deep exchange of saliva intertwined with yearning. The kiss formed an even pace, you tilted your head to the side causing the kiss to get intense, his wet tongue gliding against yours, your pout swelling as he bit your bottom lip, blood rushing into it. He could almost feel yours eyelashes fluttering against the bridge of his nose. He pulled away, landing a final peck on your soft lips before nibbling the inside of his cheek in nervosity, unsure as to why he was nervous in the first place. Maybe the thought that he would never kiss you again. You put your hands around him, rubbing your dark tinted cheeks against his shirt that was luckily in a darker color as well. He smelled like home, like comfort.

A murky scent mixed with tobacco and ephemerality.

 You haven't seen Changbin since that day. 

“How have you been y/n?” said the woman sitting opposite you, tapping her pen against the A5 block of secrets that rested against a folder that has your name on the side, filled with results of various psychological tests. You shrugged your shoulders, looking out the window where the ivys growed over the glass.

“I’ve been alright,,, although I miss someone” you answered, your eyes meeting the curious ones of your psychologist that observed your body language, your foot shaking in the air as your legs were folded on top of each other. 

“Who do you miss y/n?” she asked. You thought about telling her the truth but then had you ever done that in this office?

“Doesn’t matter,,, Just someone” you answered shortly to which the lady nodded. 

“Longing is a very difficult feeling, sometimes there’s nothing you can do about it since the only thing that will cure it is seeing that person again but of course, that’s not always possible” she said, you observing the marbled pattern on the vinyl floor. You agreed, not knowing what else to do before she started talking about something else that was connected to your well-being, wondering how you are coping with still being on the hunt for a job and having your mental health to care about in the meanwhile. 

The session ended as it always does. By you walking out of the office with an orange post-it note where the next appointment was scheduled in messy writing and with a warm goodbye to your psychologist that was a nice person. It was just that you didn’t really care for her advice and you yet again felt horrible for not taking the help you got when other people in the world couldn’t afford the same experience. The wind hit you in the face as you exited out to reality, out from the solace of the office and the building that held countless of skin-crawling memories. You pulled your jacket closer to your body, walking with quick strides towards the convenience store in order to buy gum and something sweet that could stop the world from leaving a bitter taste in your mouth at all times. A bell above the door tinkled as you stepped into the store, the grey welcome mat being a soft surface to step on with your sneakers. You casted a glance at the staff, seeing the gum you always bought by the cash register and the back of a young man in a black jacket with a baseball cap, looking upwards at the cigarettes and talking to the cashier in a husky voice. You walked past aisles of various snacks and other necessities, hearing the man talking in a voice that made your head spin, sending you into a deja vu feeling.This voice, this very voice was familiar. 

“That one,, yeah,,, thanks! Oh,, just gonna grab something real quick” he said, his footsteps getting closer to you that were hunched over, looking for the banana milk on the lower shelves and squinting your eyes as tried to look further back to see if you missed a bottle by mistake. Your eyes lit up as you saw it, stretching out your hand but in that moment you didn’t feel the cool plastic layer of the yellow manufactured drink but instead a slightly warm hand that was bigger than yours, clad in a couple of silver rings. You quickly apologized and peered upwards, your eyes landing on a couple of dark hooded eyes that made your heart start to race. The lips were plump, a bit dusky in color from the cold weather. A sharp jaw that led to a prominent chin. A triangular nose that connected to a pair of strong bushy eyebrows. A face you had so longed to see. A hand you hadn’t held in what felt like an eternity. There the two of you were, holding the same bottle of banana milk in the flickering light of the store, the coldness emitting from the refrigerated shelves.

It was him.

It was Changbin. 

He was right. 

Only when one decided to heal was it destined for you to meet in a dimensions that was real. A dimension that didn’t consist of an odd phone number and a crimson telephone booth. A world away from the loud music and booze and instead entering a world that had earlier been dark but now got lighter, your tunnelvision ending and objects getting their color back. The world seemed real again. Alive like the way scent of a rose made its way down your lungs and into your blood, feeding the feeling of love from within.

You met him. 

In a different place, in a different time. But you met the same person.

The person you were destined to meet. 

Taglist ; @minholuvs @liz820​ @skztrashbag @lix-freckle3​ 

[fishnets-fingers]

BEEP BEEP! MAKE ROOM FOR ME AND THIS BIG ASS FEEDBACK HAHAH! ENJOYYYY GOING THROUGH THIS MESS! <333

[Layla: this could be us but you’re just being difficult]. Dayum man, I’m just waiting for it to be done

[Layla: what intrigue, you rat bastard! you literally pulled out your dick and peed in front of me. all intrigue is out the window!] Help-

[Harry: Your face was quite hilarious! You just stood there staring at me, frozen in place, with floss between your teeth lmao 😜 ] LMFAO

[Layla: you’re right. but as a subscriber, i have seen  all the pictures and videos 😈] AYEEE!!

[Harry: I told you that all you had to do was ask and I’d show you everything! Don’t waste your money, Lails. You have it all.]  Awww. Well we wanted to be an honest fan sooo

[Harry: You already support me in more ways than one.] Not me smiling like some mad human

[She had a hair in a topknot, half up half down; hair ever so straight and long, bangs tucked away behind her ear.] She looks cute!

[Harry: Don’t you look cute.] Copycat -_-

[Harry: Alright. Have fun! I love you!] My heart does summersaults every time he tells her he loves her.

[It looked very soft, especially with one of Layla’s skin coloured stockings stretched over the lens - ethereal.] He knows tricks eh

[He hits shuffle - his playlist ranged from Doja Cat, Weeknd, Cigarettes After Sex to his old dirty 80s rock - and moves over to strip himself of his shorts.] I really like his taste in music

[He was wearing his fishnets and his black briefs, shirtless on top, except for the black leather collar fastened around his neck.] Hot hot hot

[With the remote in his hand, he goes to kneel on the white mattress, sitting back on his calves, leaning forward a little - palms flat on the mattress, biceps flexed.] I’m sweating-

[He took over a hundred pictures in the next two hours. Several clicks of him laying on his side - hand splayed out on his inner thigh.] nods

[He then takes a few more of him after he folds his body and drapes his tattooed arm on his knee - his you booze you lose tattoo on display, head resting on his arm.] This man-

[For the final couple of shots, he gets up and gets closer to the camera, only his chin, neck and collarbones on display and uses his narrow black belt to thread into the metal hoop at the front of his collar, winding it around his palm and holding it taunt and takes a couple of pictures.] Is this too hot or is it just the hot weather in my area?

[the corner of his mouth drops, when he looks at the caller ID.-“Yeah?” He says in a terse manner, after he presses the green button.-“Harry!” The voice chips, a familiar voice of a now unfamiliar person. “How are you, dear boy?”-“Alright.”-“What, I only get one word answers now?” He chuckles.-“What do you want, dad?” He sighs.-“Is it a crime to call up my son to check in?”-“No.”-“What are you doing right now?”-“Oh um,” his cheek flushes with colour as he looks around the room. It’s not like he could tell him he was taking pictures for his OnlyFans. “Just tidying up around the house.”-“Always the one to help your mum around the house. Guess some things don’t change.” Harry could hear him smiling on the other end of the line.-“You know me,” he manages to get out, rolling his eyes.-“Aren’t you gonna ask me what I’m up to?”-“What are you up to?”-“I’m in Manchester. Have been here for a few days for a few meetings with the mergers and acquisition team. Walked across the milkshake place you love - Shakeaway, the one at Chorlton. You remember those giant-”-“Yeah. The butterscotch and white maltesers ones.” He smiles, wistfully.-“And the brainfreeze we’d get drinking them,” he chuckles.-“Yeah.” Harry sighs.-The line goes silent, neither not knowing what to say next.-“H, what are you doing Christmas time? Do you wanna watch a game and grab a pint at a bar?”-“I won’t be in London, Dad.”-“Oh, you and mum off on a holiday?”-“We’re staying here in the States and celebrating.”-“That’s odd. Very unlike the two of you to not come home and celebrate with mum’s family.”-“Well, we’ve made a family for ourselves here. We might pop over to granddad and grandmum’s sometime after,” he says, although he doesn’t understand why he did add the last bit in.-“Oh. Thought I could see you. I picked up a Titanic record at the market the other day. Seems like an original. Pretty rare too; you can’t get the One Night in Eagle Rock anymore. Thought I could make it your Christmas present. It’s been two years since we’ve-”-“I know. Listen, I’ve got to go. Need to head to the post office soon. Told my gir - (HE SAID MY GIRL I'M GONNA FUCKING SOB) um… my friend that I’d ship some stuff of hers.” He wasn’t fully lying, he really did need to go ship Layla’s paintings of those kittens in babushkas, but he wasn’t gonna do it right now.-“Alright. You seem to be pretty busy. Hope you’ve applied to schools.”-“Yup. If everything goes well, might head to UCSD next autumn.”-“I’m positive it’ll all go smoothly, H.”-“Fingers crossed. Hey, thanks for picking up the vinyl, you didn’t have to.”-“Of course I had to, H. That’s our thing. I’m gonna let you go now.”-“Yeah. Bye.” He clicks the red button and collapses on the couch, letting out a big breath that he wasn’t aware of holding.] The saddest song of an album is playing, my periods are around the corner, I'm reading this, and I’m tearing up.

////

[holding up a small skull of a tortoise from the glass cabinet.-“It’s only six dollars. It’s the coolest thing in this room. Doesn’t this look like a dinosaur?”] how the fuck does a tortoise skull look like a dinosaur to her lmfao

[“It's not coming into my house. Nothing belonging to dead animals.”] she forgot to add it in the end, so I'll: Periodt.

[She prattles on, poorly mimicking a cackling voice of a stereotypical witch. ] help-

[“Do birds even produce saliva?” Vasanth asks. ] now THAT is a question

[“That’s right! Democracy baby,” Vasanth exclaims, high fiving his niece.] not surprised this came out of Layla's mouth

[“That’s right! Democracy baby,” Vasanth exclaims, high fiving his niece.] Lmaoo poor Abi

[Harry sighs for the umpteenth time] I'm continuously learning new words while reading your fics xD

[He looks at the ceramic ring dish, Layla made for him, on his night stand. It was such a thoughtful gesture from her to make him a dish to keep all his rings in place. ] smiles

[which is insane considering she has only been in his life for three months now.] I understand you man, I missed her (and you too) when your author was in a writer's block

[Layla: mcr just released a new song out of the blue] HAHAH! LOVE THE FANGIRL SIDE

[Layla: have i pavloved you so much that my insults are sending all the blood rushing to your dick lmao] LMFAOO

Love him fanning over her thighs bro

[The power she has over me, he thinks, smiling as he’s coming down from his high.] and the power you two motherfuckers have over me-

////

[“You’ll find out with the rest of the family in a few days at the function.”] AHH TORTUROUS PEOPLE

[“I won’t but you’re welcome to rub my feet,” Abi giggles.] Eye-

[Can’t tell that that's an alligator,” Abi says. ] NAUR SHE'S NOT EATING A GODDAMN ALLIGATOR WTF

////

[“Alright, I’m gonna pop over to Harry’s,” she says, hands going into the pockets of her sweats.-“We just got in,” Vasanth raises his brow.-“So?”-“Don’t you wanna shower first?”-“I’ll do it later.”] grins

[He got sucked into the game the minute he got to know that he could name his animals and his character.] lmaooo

[“Give me a minute I just need to collect one more Goddess Gem, so I can marry the Harvest Goddess.”] Seriously- I will throw fucking hands.

[“Wait?!? Why am I helping you?”] THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M WONDERING BYOTCH

[“Fine.” She huffs. “Guess, sex is off the table then. I’m gonna take a shower.” She unzips her lilac puffer jacket and shuffles it on his floor.-“Whoa, hold on now.” He flips the device close and puts it on the desk and walks towards her.] I'm honestly gonna throw this man off the 12th floor of a apartment.

[“Hi, baby.” He whispers, bending down to nuzzle his nose against hers. “I missed you so fucking much.”] *smiles* *realizes that i'm smiling* yeah well whatever.

[“Nice try but never.”] didn't expect anything else.

[“My sweet girl  wants to be touched, huh?”-She nods. “Cut it out with the teasing,” she demands. -And he does.] lmao the power she has over him

[“Can I not use a condom? Just wanna feel all of you.”-“Okay. Pull out, alright.”] just telling you that I hate pregnancy trope, yanno, just in case...

[She was indescribable, almost like his antidote.] hmmm, nice.

[He notices her hands - one gripping onto the shower handle, the other clawing onto the cold tile and he can’t help but feel jealous.] I fucking knew it.

I cannot express in words how good you write a smut. Like I need to bow down to you

[“Hurts,” she gasps, tightening around him.-“Motherfuck,” he moans loudly. “Don’t. Or I’ll come,” he warns and she relaxes around his throbbing prick.] Harry seems a little weird in this part, idk why..

[“Fuck fuck fucking hell,” he curses, eyes screwed shut, pulling out of her hurriedly - just in time -  as he comes all over her stomach – warmth spreading in his body. ] thank fuck oh my god

[He hooks her leg onto his shoulder, palms laying flat against her belly - holding her squirmy body still - as he dives into her folds, intending to take full advantage of what his scruff can do. ] this sentence was alone HOT enough.

////

[She’s threatened to bite him if he ever woke her up early during the weekends for his runs.] das my girl

[They’d both start with a cuddle but would eventually need their own space, because they were both predominantly stomach sleepers. ] THANK YOU FOR NORMALIZING THIS!! Majority of the writers make it seem like their characters be cuddeling all night like Koalas clung to some tree

[Until you. I like cuddling with you because it makes me feel like that. Like safe and comfortable enough to let my guard down to accept your care. So no, I’m not putting up with it just because you’re a touch person. I look forward to it actually.” It knocked the soul out of him. He went home that night and cried himself to sleep knowing that he was able to provide a haven for his sweet girl. ] WAIT. I know I have read this para before. By you obviously. But I've read this before.

[They are also creatures of habit, quite like you.] heheh

[“They are- wait am I waffling about and boring you?” He stops.] That honestly hurts. When someone is talking about something and in the middle they cut themselves off and go: 'am i boring you' or something. Like it just hurts.

[“Harry, don't sell yourself short. No one just gets to go on an all expense paid year long research expedition in the Arctic Circle, especially when they are right out of school.” ] self appreciation is real important, but who am i to say

[She always gave and gave, sometimes it resulted in back and forths just to get her to accept care from him. Care in the form of appreciation. Gratitude. Helping her with whatever she was doing. Helping her unwind with a massage or a movie.  Paying for things. Wanting to spoil her. But it was hard sometimes. She was far too stubborn. He’d also notice the way her eyes flit around any room they walk into, assessing the situation, like she’s gauging the temperature of the water by dipping her toe in before taking the plunge. Taking care of people was her default mode, she’d find time to squeeze the act in even if she was slammed that day. His fingers drift to the exposed honey like skin under her collarbone, she was wearing his white ribbed tank and one of the sleeves had slid down her shoulder. He presses his lips to her sleep warm cheek, sighing in response to her scent crescendoing. ] I don't think I'll be able to let go of Layla after how attached I've become to her and how much similarities we share.

////

[“You’re full of surprises, little girl.”] oh tell me about it

[“Not really. Her recipes are always elaborate and time intensive. Everyone came over to relax, so spending over two hours on a recipe wasn’t at the top of their list.”] mate cooking together for 2 hours would be rather fun than 'relaxing'

[and she always goes ‘why don’t you ask me to die already,’”] lmfaoo

[He drops his white tote on the ram recliner] I absolutely love tote bags, like I've been obsessed with them since I was 12-13

[“Lovely afternoon, is it not?” Harry takes Earl’s hand and presses his lips to his knuckles, cracking them all up.] lmao this trio is the best

[He was wearing a pair of hot pink and neon green checkered shorts - it looked like it was stitched from a curtain.] that fact that I know what shorts you're talking about and + the description made me cackle

[“Wait, snail poison?!?” Layla exclaims.-“Yeah. There’s an infestation of them in my cabbage patches.”-“So you’re planning to kill them?”-Earl nods. “They’ve chowed down on almost all of my cabbages, those fat slimy bastards.”] just pick them up and leave them in mud it's not that hard??

[“Fat chance. I’m not touching those slimy things. You’re on your own, baby.”] help- lmao I wish I was there

[The next few minutes go by in silence as Layla gets to slicing up the tomatoes and lettuce. She keeps giving the two dirty looks every now and then as she arranges the thinly sliced tomatoes on a bed of lettuce.] such a Layla thing to do xD

[“He'd rather die than tell you what’s in there Earl. Don’t even try, you’d only be wasting your time,” Layla informs, as she picks up a spoon to transfer the shrimp on top of the tomatoes. ] I get Harry very well in this one. I love journaling too and have like a whole stack of journals which are full

[“Umm… just things. Things that I see, emotions I experience, things that I like, things that pop up in my head.” He slides the book closer to him. ] Do you need scissors? To like, cut the tension? Cause man it's thick.

[“Let’s head to the dining room. The boy’s uncomfortable. His ears are to his shoulders. Well, Harry, we get that it’s personal. But I would be happy to read whatever you write, if you are comfortable sharing.” Earl slips out of the barstool. “I’m gonna head to the restroom and wash up.”-“Thanks, Earl.” He nods and Earl squeezes his shoulders before he disappears into the hallway. ] Yeah, thanks Earl :)

[A slight drizzle for Harry and Earl, and two generous tablespoons -with all the sliced chillies -for her. ] we love chilly/spicy food

“I’m old these things happen more often now. It’s not the first time. I’ll be fine.”

[“Sure. Almost forgot to tell you this.” He gets closer to her, lips close to her ear like he’s gonna share a secret. “You look beautiful today,” he says, trailing his fingertips down her cheek. His feathery stroke tickles when he gets to the column of her neck, making her squirm. “Your shirt is just marvellous,” he cockily smirks, fingers coming to clasp her gold elephant pendant that rested on the centre of her collarbones.] Smirks

I loved the exchange they had after this <333

[“I’m old these things happen more often now. It’s not the first time. I’ll be fine.”] that's straight up more worrying.

[Earl can’t help but notice the little things between the two of them and how much they were in sync with each other. When Layla looks around the table for something, midbite, Harry wordlessly heads to the kitchen and brings her the bottle of sriracha. She smiles and says a muffled thank you to him, mouthful of food, and sheepishly smiles at the two of them as she proceeds to paint the inside of her sandwich with the fiery red condiment. When Harry knocks Layla’s phone off the table with his elbows, as he takes a sip of water, he watches Layla cover the edge of the wooden table with her  palm while he’s bending down to pick her phone and on cue, Harry being klutzy as ever bumps into the same spot but comes in contact with her hand and not the sharp edge.] Sighs in hopeless romantic. You got the last one from insta, didnt you eh?

[“Dance with me,” he murmurs, lips brushing against her neck, making her shiver.-“Can’t,” she smirks against his jaw. He pulls back to look at her face and frowns. “I’m on a step stool. Very restricting movement wise, I’m afraid,” she teases him.-“Dickhead,” he whispers, rolling his eyes. God, was she a menace. “Sway with me then?”-“I’d like that very much.”] I'm sure these two will give me cavity in my heart.

[They both sway together, smiling at each other, both lovestruck fools - but one unable to recognise that. The added height for Layla changed things for them, instead of burrowing her face into his chest, this time they were almost on par with each other. Harry resting his nose on top of hers, their breaths igniting warmth against their skin, chests indescribably close, lips a hairline away from one and another - brushing every now and then as they moved. Smiles stretching across their faces, dimples fully making an appearance on their cheeks.  Green eyes locked with her hickory hued orbs. Harrys mutters many ‘I love you’s in between the verses. They both felt so incredibly cocooned with each others’ endearment. It’s not a common occurrence, you see, seeing a stranger through your window and having them tight in your arms - a few months later, as you are baring your soul to them.] I think my soul just left my body.

[“Does it bother you that I haven’t said I love you back?” She asks him, lips gnawing on her bottom lip, eyes focusing  - on her painting that Earl had hung up - behind his ear.-“Why would it bother me? I told you this last time, remember… I don’t want you to rush in any way or feel like you need to tell me that you love me. I can wait. I just need you to know that I do.” He kisses her temple.-“It’s just…” Her lower lip trembles and Harry can’t help but rub this thumb over it. “J-Ju-Just,” she stumbles with her words, chest heaving a sob threatening to breach the levee. -“Hey,” he coos. His hands come to tightly grip the back of her thighs, right where her bum ends, and plops her on the counter, nudging her knees and wiggling himself in between. His hands come to cup her face, lifting her head to read her eyes. “What is it? You can tell me anything,” he prods.-A bead slips down one of her eyes and he’s quick to wipe it away with his thumb. “It’s just that I feel so guilty when you say it and I don’t. Initially when you said it, it was all tingly but now I just feel bad that I can’t. You don’t deserve this. You’re so nice to me all the time and I feel like you should be with someone who deserves you, you know.” Her heavy wet eyelashes blink up at him.-“Lails, it is not your place to tell me what I deserve. I need to - no, I want to be with you. You don’t get to tell me otherwise. You’re the one I want - on purpose. I choose you on purpose. I’m sorry you’re feeling guilty. But you should have told me about this sooner, baby. Should I stop saying it? Would that help?” He tucks a loose lock of her hair behind her ear. -

Layla thinks about it, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, eyes flitting down to his shirt she’s wearing; she inspects the way the fabric is bunched around the tops thighs. She smooths out the creases with her fingers, feeling the seam of her jeans digging into the side of her thighs - protesting against her movement.-“No,” she says, timidly. “I don’t know,” she huffs out frustratedly. “Maybe, I’m not explaining this properly.” She uses the back of her hand to wipe her nose. “I’m scared.”-“Scared?” He asks, eyebrows arching up as he caresses her cheeks, hoping to provide her some comfort.-“It’s just that I am not very comfortable or good at expressing affection towards others. Especially, verbally. Like it’s much more valuable in a way. Especially if I bring myself to tell someone that I love them and it will just make it that much harder to lose them.” She sniffles. “What I’m blabbering… I can’t umm..” she tries, but tears spring to her eyes, and she screws them shut, trying to even out her breathing - hunkering that memory deep down.

-Layla was ten, she was busy hiding in the kitchen, using her new craft punches that her father dropped off at school when he came to visit. She only saw him at school now. Sometimes her grandparents would come with him. Her mother didn’t want her talking to them, so she’d kept it a secret. She kept the fact that her father, and sometimes her grandparents would come visit her in school grounds, after school hours for forty minutes. Her mother didn’t know about it because she had basketball practice till four thirty, and her mother came to pick her up after practice. He’d bought her a set of those paper punches which cut paper into different shapes. The same punchers, she used to make confetti with her colourful origami papers - she cut out many flowers, stars, hearts, butterflies, and fishes. Her mother had been sad when she came to pick her up. She had been sad all through that evening, so after Layla made dinner for them, her mother’s favourite - a simple vermicelli upma, she’d gone to execute her plan in motion. She went up to her mother, who was at the dining table, looking at a stack of papers wistfully and threw the confetti in her direction shouting a very loud ‘I love you, Amma’ - hoping it would cheer her up. But it went horribly wrong, her mother was startled, causing her to tip the opened water bottle all over the papers on the table. Her mother shouted profanities at her as Layla begged for forgiveness, she got up and grabbed a fistful of Layla’s hair and slammed it right on to the closest brick wall. ‘லூசுநாயே (stupid bitch)’ she yelled. Her jaw came into contact with cement first but Layla had managed to block the rest of her face from the wall by putting her palms in between her face and the wall. She couldn’t feel the pain but noticed blood on her shirt before she realised that blood was spouting from her mouth; she'd lost her first ever baby tooth from the impact - she’d found it two days later under the fridge, she’d later buried it in her backyard hoping she would grow a plant that would have teeth as flowers. Her mother quickly apologises telling her she didn’t mean to and she did this because she loves her, as she ushered Layla to the bathroom to help her rinse out the blood in her mouth. That was the last time she’d ever said I love you.-

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles shakily to Harry, after she’d shoved down that memory, blinking back the film in her eyes that made her vision hazy.

“It’s alright. You’re alright,” he tells her, he could tell she was struggling with something. -“It’s just that, it makes it more real, you know. And if something were to happen, it would make losing you so much harder. And I selfishly don’t want that.” She finishes. “I’m being stupid. Sorry.” -“Sweet girl,” he utters, resting his forehead against hers.-A snort escapes her lips and her hands immediately come to cover her mouth. “Sorry.” She giggles.-“Shut up. I don’t call you that only during sex,” he whines. Finding himself giggling with her even through his denial. -“Do you want me to start counting again?” She laughs.-“Don’t be a dickhead.” He presses his lips against her forehead.-“Can’t help it you know,” she shrugs.-“Thank you for sharing this with me,” he says, coming back to cup her face, feeling how warm her cheeks have gotten against his palms.-“Just know this, you mean the world to me, Har.”]

MAYA. YOU NEED TO STOP MAKING ME CRY DO YOU HEAR ME?? I TEARED UP TWICE WHILE READING THIS PART AND NOW I'M CRYING. I LOVE YOU THIS IS AMAZING.

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Most people with the name Dhruv have a buzzcut idk why..

Also, you should listen to Buzzcut Season by Lorde! It's an absolute gold song.

[“Sweeeet!” He exclaims. “Loose fries!” He picks three up and pops it into his mouth. “I swear they’re laced with cocaine or some shit. Tastes so fucking better than normal fries,” he declared with his mouth full of fried potato. ] Grins

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KILLED IT MAYA!! LOVED THIS, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE I CRIED LMAO LOVE YOUUU

How dare you think of me in such a way!!! No pregnancies for these two! They aren’t even done with college. Not full time adults yet. Why would they raise another human?? Nope. Nope. Nope.

Also you did read that paragraph. I sent it to you hehehe

Sorry for making you cry. Also I love that Ashwin isn’t mentioned here *cackles maniacally*

Eating alligators is something Layla would deffo do.

Plus, what did you think about her conversation with Harry and her flashback? (Is that the place you stopped and made you wanna rant?)

Also, thank you thank you thank you for this. I look forward to this more that I look forward to writing!! *muwah*