#the audacity of my brain
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Me when I’m NOT writing: Ideas flowing like a waterfall. Me when I AM writing: [Dial-up tone noises]
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Me: absolutely no time to spare, crumbling under my to do list
Also me: why is there no cycling race I could watch from start to finish this month?
#the audacity of my brain#I cannot#I can finally catch a break and try to make a dent into all I have to do#and I’m missing stuff that takes hours in my day#I mean#I’m self aware enough to know that what I want is to avoid my responsibilities for hours on end#but I should really really take the opportunity to DO THINGS#especially with the biathlon season coming up#cycling#road cycling#come on! 💪
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I've gotten to the point with my mental health that I am mostly fine and dandy but then - like today - I experience sensory overload so bad that it takes all my self control to not have an anxiety attack in the middle of the store
#eva rambles#the audacity of my brain#I haven't had sensory overload THAT bad in so long#but there were so many people and so much noise and scents and my brain just kinda fried#I was very close to sobbing in the vegetable isle#anyway I might invest in some loop earplugs#I heard good things about them helping with sensory overload
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What sort of neurodivergent fuckery caused the cursed amalgamation that was a mash-up of 'Cheap Thrills' (Sia) and 'Into the Unknown' (Idina Menzel) to be stuck in my head most of the day today?
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What about eating your own beanie, Mr Clown.
























EAT YOUR OWN BEANIE
#akai: hey ex-love-of-my-life that i dumped for the woman i was honeypotting and i caught feelings for - you got a crush on this kid? lmao#/ akai 3h later: ooooh.#i'm not even including anything from Wizard of the Ripples because akai remembers NONE OF IT#(love it. love how shinichi-conan's brain managed to charm him twice at different times of their lives)#the Audacity of poking fun at jodie when the whole arc will be the two silver bullets forming that secret long-lasting alliance...#james wasn't even supposed to know!!#anyway things i'll never get over: conan seeking akai out & really meaning to work with him AS SOON as he heard about his ties with akemi#akai dissing everyone (his coworkers his boss his ex his 'wife') to throw compliments at this kid#scarlet return debrief: conan's little BRITISH TIE??? hands in pockets??? he's so proud to have managed to pull this off/to get praised#and akai's casual amusement at being ordered around by this kid-teenager who takes him for granted (and is right about it) (UNTIL HE ISN'T#BECAUSE WOOPS AKAI IS NOW MAKING PLANS WITH THE PARENTS NOWADAYS)#dcmk#conan edogawa#shuuichi akai#silver bullets#long post/#six-year-old shinichi called him a clown on sight at the beach and was RIGHT#akai: he's like the little sibling i never had! / shuukichi: / masumi:#(joke because all in all his relationship with shuukichi is kinda great?? for shuuichi's standards#masumi however... in his own very special distant meanie way he cares but wow.)
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"This... is your master?" 🤭
— THE ACOLYTE: NIGHT
#oshamir#the acolyte#osha aniseya#qimir#master sol#theacolyteedit#starwarsblr#swsource#thestarwarsdaily#swedit#tvedit#flytheedit#this show did something permanent to my brain#the audacity qimir has to be smiling and lowkey flirting with her here#right in front of master sol's salad???#i keep him in a jar and i study him like a bug
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I was NOT thinking straight
#breaking bad#skyler white#and walt had the audacity NOT to be happy with his life??#she did not deserve all those idiots around her#just her in this scene rent free in my brain#brba
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I don't really like how this came out, but it took WAY too long not to post
#fight club#fight club 1999#fight club art#fight club fanart#narrator fight club#the narrator#fanart#art#edward norton#literally took me 2.5 hours to complete and then my brain had the audacity to not like it#ignore the shadow being on the wrong side please and thank you
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A pawn that crossed the field and bloomed into human anew. That is Kamen Rider Cameo.
(In which my friends suggested me to make a Geats OC to play with theirs... and of damn course it's a Jyamato 🧍♀️)
Some more sketches under the cut because I liked them enough to share as well ✨ more details in ALT caps



#original character#fan character#oc#kamen rider#kamen rider geats#kr geats#jyamato#fanart#tokusatsu#and here I present you all the materialization of the brain damage that the brief existence of jyamatooru caused on me#also called Kamen Rider Cameo — a fully developed jyamato rider that walks on the line between monster and human#he has a whole char sheet about his character and lore but i aint uncalledly infodumping you all#sharing drawings of him is more than i ever did to any of my other ocs — except alfa-16 from d2 gurl got a lot of exposition#tbh he's two ocs in one bc i also made lore for the rider he took his appearance from#AND ALL OF THAT IN A BIT MORE THAN A MONTH IS2G I WAS ON FIRE#can u believe one of my friends had the audacity to see my cameo concepts and be like—#'haha he looks like a buccoon lovechild' IS2G I TRIED //NOT// TO LET MY BIAS SHOW#anyway i have my japanese exam this weekend and my works are wrapping up so i can go back to my swap au#trust me i too am tired of having put it aside there's still a lot to cook there
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Had a weird ass dream where I was me but I was also Hua Cheng and all I cared about was flirting with gege but I needed to go interview for grad school
Hua Hua did NOT help dream me get into grad school he was too busy being a simp
#rotted brain#all I think about is fictional characters and grad school#it was fun being Hua Cheng I had all this audacity#my post#tgcf#hualian#hua cheng
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since lowering the dose of and the frequency i take my meds i've developed a bad habit of ascribing any subtle change in my behaviour as being a result of this (mostly just out of paranoia because i'm worried about acting differently in a way i'm not aware or in control of).
but i just had a moment where i was looking at my most recent drawings and noticed it's like 90% connor butt jokes and thought, with genuine concern: oh no. med withdrawal is making me draw too much connor ass!!!
it certainly isn't. half of the shit i'm drawing are ideas i thought of years ago and took a shamefully long time to actually draw anyway. I just only gain self-awareness once those ideas can be perceived by others.
but damn. i can't believe i've been taking pills that stop you drawing connor ass for years! it's a sickness, and baby, i haven't put in my repeat prescription request.
#his ass is both funny and frightening ok???? im creatively driven by things that make me laugh and things that scare me#it's not lost on me how stupid and funny it is that drawing too much connor ass is something i have become self conscious about#as if drawing ass isn't something i strongly commend#but the audacity to feel self-conscious when actively choosing to draw the type of shit i draw#im an extremely anxious person with not enough self control to stop myself from drawing whatever my brain sharts out#and it's my weird over explainy and apologetic response to it that makes me contemptible and off-putting#also kind of unrelated but a little bit related. Iast night i dreamt that i was prescribed methylphenidate#but it was in the form of a huge raw jelly cube that took like an hour to eat
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Releasing chapter 426 after the anime FINALLY adapted the Touya backstory feels like an attack against me specifically

Look at this and tell me this wasn't meant to hurt me?
#bnha#bnha spoilers#bnha leaks#bnha 426#and after I made a lovely amv for my beautiful touya#spent a whole day staring at his face only for Horikoshi to do this. absolutely unbelievable. the audacity of this man#reignite my brain rot only to kill him off#I am agog#i am aghast
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when a battle can't be solved with dark nova yakumo
#me at the sorceror's trials when i can't brute force it#there are probably better attackers out there since DN yaku got released a while ago#but i don't have them.#so every time there's a problem#i throw my nerdworm at the enemies to make them go away LOL#then the gimmick has the AUDACITY to be like#(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) teehe.e. the enemies counter 300% every turn#or#(*/ω\*) oh no ! your attacker in that slot can't do anything but guard!#[irritably starts shuffling my units around the roster like i'm a cup sliding scam artist]#STOP THAT. IF I CAN'T MELEE MY WAY OUT OF THIS I'LL HAVE TO uSE MY BRAIN#AND NO ONE WILL LIKE THAT#IF I CAN'T TAKE DOWN AT LEAST 40% OF THE ENEMY'S HP IN ONE HIT THEN THE DOPAMINE AINT GONNA CASCADE DOWN MY SYNAPSES LIKE TROPICAL RAIN#nu carnival yakumo
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Stobotnik nation I would like to recommend “Your Stupid Face” by Kaden MacKay for your consideration
#they’ve absolutely taken over my brain#and then my playlist shuffle had the audacity to play this song for me#stobotnik#dr ivo robotnik#agent stone
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A very drunk Zayne constantly referring to MC as "Pretty Lady"
#it was only two drinks boo 😭#i should be studying#but this man has the audacity to be living in my brain rent free atm#send help#zayne#zayne love and deepspace#love and deepspace#love & deepspace#l&ds#lads
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What’s a small thing / tiny irritation you wish you could throw ppl in prison for
Things people deserve a day long timeout without bail for:
Being mean to service workers
Making a mess in public bathrooms and just leaving it without telling anyone (no one should ever have to ask the question "how did that even get there???")
Flipping me off while we're both driving - it makes me sad every time :(
Asking if my class ring is my wedding band (stop it. I don't know you and you're not smooth)
Playing videos in public with the audio on full blast (especially in public toilets)
Filming anyone in public without their consent
Assuming I'm a robot on the phone... what company would pick my voice???? I sound like minnie mouse
#can you tell my brain is in library mode?#people and their audacity...#cottagecore-raccoon#ask#asks
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