#the anguish when he's talking to him and asking him why he didn't just fix him

[q-uuestion]

The character arc lore could have had

[maxtermind]

absolutely loved ‘baby, would i still be your lover’, everyone single one got me in my feels! i was wondering would you consider doing a part 2? whether it ends in angst or fluff

I'll tell you the truth, but never goodbye

★ : summary :: when he accidentally insults you during an argument- aftermath ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: hurt/comfort, hints of angst ★ : word count :: 4.3k ★ : a/n :: thank you so much for the love on part 1 💓 some of these have open ending so you can pick whether you'd like to forgive them or not as a reader!! feedback is appreciated :)

( part 1 )

Max Verstappen

You sighed as you sat down to have your morning tea as usual, trying to pretend that nothing was wrong. As if you hadn't spent all night long getting your phone spammed with calls that you were ignoring.

After mindlessly roaming around for a bit, you eventually decided to crash at your best friend’s place. You lazily waved at her as she frantically got ready to leave for work. However, you were on your tiptoe as soon as the door opened.

A body that was possibly sleeping while leaning against the door fell inside and you heard curses that you were quite too familiar with. Your heart clenched at the sight of your boyfriend - or perhaps now, your ex-boyfriend - on his knees, nursing the wound on his head. The ache of seeing him in pain reignited the anguish you thought you had left behind.

“Okay,” you heard your friend murmur. “I'm gonna let you guys get to it.” She was out the door a second later.

You looked at the closed door instead of the man who was desperately trying to make eye contact with you.

“How long have you…” You trailed off before deciding that you didn't want to know.

“As soon as you turned your phone off, Y/N! I've been here since last night.” "Why?" you choked out, the words barely escaping your lips as tears threatened to overflow. His brows furrowed before he ran his hands over his face and got up to sit right next to you. You saw his hand itching toward yours and instinctively pulled it towards your body. "Because I needed to see you in person, to talk." He took another deep breath and you later realized that he was trying to stop himself from crying. “I realize I messed up, baby. I.. I never should have let you walk out.” But his attempt to mend the shattered pieces of your relationship only served to reopen the wounds, your walls instinctively rising in defense,"Talk? You think a talk is going to fix everything?" Max's eyes were filled with a mix of regret and desperation as he reached out for your hand, his fingers trembling slightly. "No, I don't think a talk will magically fix everything," he admitted, his voice raw with emotion.

"But it's a start. I need you to know that I'm truly sorry for what happened. I hate myself for hurting you, for making you doubt how much you mean to me."

You couldn't bring yourself to meet his gaze, the pain of the previous night still too fresh in your mind.

“How can I trust you again, Max? How can I be sure that this won't happen again?" Your voice was barely a whisper, filled with the ache of betrayal.

Max's grip on your hand tightened, his eyes pleading for understanding. "I know I've messed up, Y/N. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to earn back your trust. I'll work on my temper, I’ll be better to you, I'll do anything you ask of me. I just need you to give me another chance." “You know you’ve always been the best to me, right? I just can���t believe that instead of talking it out yesterday, you straight up skipped to breaking up wit-” Fresh tears started falling down your cheeks. Max immediately leaned forward to hold you in his arms and you let him because you needed him. But how could you trust him again? How could you be sure that history wouldn't repeat itself? That he won’t throw away your whole relationship just because the anger got a hold of him? As Max held you close, you felt a wave of conflicting emotions wash over you. Part of you wanted to push him away, to scream and shout at him for causing you so much pain. But another part of you craved his warmth, his touch, his presence.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Max whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I know I messed up, and I hate myself for it. I never meant to hurt you, I swear."

You buried your face in his chest, the tears soaking through his shirt as you struggled to make sense of your feelings.

“I just don't know if I can do this anymore, Max," you admitted, your voice muffled against him. Max tightened his embrace, his arms wrapping around you protectively. "I understand," he murmured, his voice gentle. His admission eased your thumping heart a bit, you were glad to have him back. The storm within you finding a momentary calm.

"I made you feel like our relationship was disposable, like breaking up was no big deal. But that couldn't be further from the truth. You're the most important person in my life, baby and the thought of losing you terrifies me. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right between us, to show you just how much you mean to me. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust if you still want me."

Lewis Hamilton

The weight of Lewis's words hung heavy in the air, suffocating you as you retreated into the sanctuary of your bedroom. Tears streamed down your cheeks unchecked, your heart aching with a pain you couldn't quite comprehend. How had a day that started with such a promise turned into this? You buried your face in your hands, the sting of Lewis's words feeling like acid running through your veins.

Outside the door, the silence was deafening, broken only by the muffled sound of your sobs. Lewis stood frozen in place, his mind racing as he replayed the exchange in his head.

He couldn't believe the words that had escaped his lips, couldn't fathom how he had allowed his frustration to morph into such hurtful remarks.

Minutes stretched into eternity as Lewis grappled with the weight of his actions, the gravity of his words settling like a lead weight in his chest.

He wanted to reach out to you, to apologize and make things right, but his feet remained rooted to the spot, paralyzed by the magnitude of his mistake.

Inside the bedroom, you were consumed by a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. Anger, hurt, betrayal - they all swirled together into an ugly monster, threatening to engulf you whole.

How could the man you loved, the man who had always been your rock, turn on you with such venom?

But beneath the anger and hurt, there was a flicker of doubt, a gnawing fear that maybe Lewis's words held a grain of truth. Maybe you were too insecure, too needy, too demanding. Maybe you were asking for too much, expecting him to be there for you when he had his own priorities and responsibilities. Maybe-

The sound of a soft knock on the door snapped you out of your thoughts, and you looked up to see Lewis standing there, his expression wrought with regret and guilt. For a moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of the unspoken apology hanging heavy in the air. Looking at him distraught made your chest feel worse. How could he make you feel ten fold worse than this and not feel a thing? 

"I'm sorry," Lewis finally whispered, his voice barely audible. "I didn't mean what I said. I was out of line, and I know I hurt you. Please, let me make it right." He rushed through the words.

His words pierced through the haze of your pain, and you felt a bit of heaviness leaving your body. He crossed the room in a few strides, dropping to his knees in front of you, his eyes pleading for forgiveness. 

"I don't know what came over me," he admitted, his voice thick with emotion before your boyfriend took your hand away from your face and kissed your cheeks. "I was so caught up in my own frustrations that I lashed out at you, and I hate myself for it. You don't deserve to be treated that way, especially not by me."

You studied his face, searching for any sign of insincerity, but all you saw was genuine remorse and regret. And despite the pain still raw in your chest, you couldn't deny the love you felt for him, the longing to mend what had been broken between you. “You hurt me,” you whispered but didn’t push him away as he laid down with you, holding you close to his chest. Some of your resolve wavering when you felt his fast heartbeat. “I wanted you there so much.” He nodded as he shushed you, his own eyes dropping tears. “I’m so so sorry, baby. I can't even begin to express how deeply I regret the way I acted the whole day, I know you deserve so much more but-” You shifted slightly, knowing all that you wanted right now was comfort, you didn't want to forgive him or minimize the weight of his actions. "I don't know if I can right now," you replied, your voice trembling with the weight of your emotions.

Lewis's eyes brimmed with tears as he whispered, "Please don't shut me out. I can't bear the thought of losing you."

You felt a pang of guilt at the pain evident in his voice. "I just need some time to process everything," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

"I understand," Lewis replied, his tone filled with sorrow. "But please know that I'm here whenever you're ready to talk."

You nodded, silently acknowledging his words as you allowed yourself to be enveloped in his comforting embrace. 

"I promise to make it up to you," Lewis vowed earnestly, his voice laced with determination. "I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust."

"I want to believe you," you admitted quietly, your heart heavy with uncertainty. Everything was a little too raw right now and your emotions were all over the place.

"I'll spend every moment proving it to you," Lewis declared, his eyes locking with yours in a silent vow.

“I was thoughtless and cruel today, and I never should have let those words leave my lips. You are not insecure, you are strong and resilient, baby. You deserve so much better than the hurtful words I spoke. Please know that I can’t lose you, Y/N. I will work tirelessly to regain your trust and rebuild what I have so carelessly shattered. You mean the world to me, and I will spend every moment striving to be worthy of your love.”

Carlos Sainz

As you sat nervously in your childhood home, the familiar sights and sounds providing little comfort, your mind raced with thoughts of disappointment and hurt.

For the third time, Carlos had failed to join you in meeting your parents, leaving you to face their questioning looks and unspoken concerns alone. You had rehearsed what you would say to them, how you would explain his absence, but each time, the words caught in your throat, choked by a mixture of frustration and sadness. For the past few days since you walked out of your apartment, you had been ignoring Carlos’ attempts to reconcile with you. The calls and texts he spammed you with were ignored and curses left your mouth as soon as your mind went back to the day of the argument, bringing unwanted tears to your eyes.

In the passing, you saw a Ferrari conference being conducted and as much as you wanted to reach out and talk it out with him, your heart did flips that you were sure you should have visited a doctor for.

Your parents, ever perceptive, noticed your unease as you fidgeted with the napkin in your lap, casting worried glances in your direction. You tried to muster a reassuring smile, but it faltered, betraying the turmoil within you.

How could you explain to them that the man you loved couldn't find the time to meet them, despite his promises and assurances? "What's wrong, sweetie?" your mom asked, concern evident in her voice.

You sighed, hesitating for a moment before replying, "It's Carlos... He like…"

Your dad's brow furrowed. "Is everything okay?"

You tried to muster a reassuring smile. "Yeah, he said that he got caught up with work. You know how busy he is with his racing and all..." Your dad’s brows furrowed when you trailed off, about to ask you what exactly you meant but just as you were steeling yourself to broach the subject, the doorbell rang, startling you from your thoughts.

Your heart sank as you realized it was likely a neighbor stopping by to meet you since you don’t visit that often, you stood up to go greet them. But then, to your disbelief, you heard his voice drifting through the door, before you saw your boyfriend standing right behind it. Your head titled in confusion and you drew a breath that took most of the stress from the previous days away from your body.

"Sorry I'm late," he said, his tone apologetic yet determined. Carlos took your hand and kissed it lightly,"Traffic was a nightmare." “What about the conference that you-” “You’re the most important person in my life, Y/N.” He cut you off before pulling you in and walking to the dining room that was in his vision. As if that was the answer to your question.

You turned to face him, your eyes wide with surprise and a flicker of hope. There he was, looking slightly disheveled but undeniably earnest, his gaze that locked on yours was as if it was seeking forgiveness. You could see the sincerity in his eyes, the regret etched in the lines of his face.

Your parents exchanged a glance, their expressions softening as they took in the sight of Carlos standing before them. 

Despite their reservations about his repeated absences, they couldn't deny the genuine affection that Carlos held in his eyes when he looked at you.

Before you could find the words to respond, Carlos took a step forward, his hand reaching out tentatively. "I'm really sorry, both of you," he said, addressing your parents directly.

"I know how important this is to you, and I should have made more of an effort to be here on time."

His words hung in the air, a silent acknowledgment of his shortcomings and a pledge to do better. You felt a surge of emotion welling up inside you, a mixture of relief, gratitude, and a glimmer of renewed faith in your relationship. "Well, we're just glad you could make it," your dad said, offering Carlos a handshake.

"Thank you for coming, Carlos," your mother said, her voice warm yet cautious. "We understand that life gets busy, but it's important to make time for the people who matter most."

Carlos nodded, his expression earnest as he met her gaze. "I couldn't agree more. Family means putting in effort, I promise to make it up to all of you."

As you sat down to dinner, the atmosphere was tinged with a sense of reconciliation and hope. Your hand still intertwined with his as you saw him charm your family. Despite the rocky start, Carlos's presence brought a newfound sense of unity and understanding to the table. And as you shared stories and laughter, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the opportunity to mend what had seemed irreparably broken.

In that moment, you realized that love wasn't just about grand gestures or sweeping declarations—it was about the everyday moments of connection and compromise, the willingness to forgive and grow together.

And as you looked at Carlos, his eyes filled with determination and affection, you knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand.

Charles Leclerc

Charles had apologized right after he had said those words and though you had both fallen back into routine, the underlying bitterness and resentment was still present. You weren’t the one initiating any kind of affection from your side and every time Charles was initiating anything, you half assed your way out of it. Was it childish? Probably. But you were still not comfortable with how easily you had forgiven Charles, burying your hurt just to avoid conflict once again despite knowing deep down that he has hurt you probably more than anyone else ever has. These thoughts were running through your head as you sat beside Charles, your heart still heavy with the weight, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that lingered in the air. Especially because Charles seemed distant, his mind preoccupied with thoughts, that you couldn't help but wonder what exactly they were. Why had he even asked to go on a date today? To break up with you? Suddenly, Pippa appeared, her presence causing the knot to form in your stomach to get tighter. She approached with a confident stride, a charming smile gracing her lips as she greeted Charles with a hug.

"Hey, Charlie!" Pippa exclaimed, her eyes flickering briefly in your direction before returning to Charles. "Long time no see!"

Charles returned her hug, though his embrace seemed somewhat forced. "Hey, Pippa. Yeah, it's been a while." 

You observed their interaction closely, your unease growing with each passing moment. Pippa's presence always seemed to unsettle you, and you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to their friendship than met the eye. Was he gonna break up with you in public and confess his years long feelings for Pippa? Charles glanced at you, his expression softening as he reached for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. "I was just out with Y/N today."

You couldn't help but feel a rush of warmth at his actions, his affectionate gesture soothing some of the tension that had been building between you.

"Nice to meet you, Y/N," Pippa said, offering you a friendly smile. "Sorry I didn’t see you next to Charlie."

You returned her smile, though it didn't quite reach your eyes and managed to reply without gagging. "Nice to meet you, Pippa." Charles tightened his grip on your hand, silently reassuring you of his presence and support. "We were just grabbing a coffee," he explained, his gaze flickering between you and Pippa. "Care to join us?"

Pippa hesitated for a moment, her eyes narrowing slightly as she glanced at you before turning back to Charles. "Actually, I was hoping we could catch up alone, if that's okay."

You felt a pang of anxiety at her words, a sense of foreboding settling in the pit of your stomach. Despite your reservations, you nodded, forcing a smile as you released Charles's hand. It was better to walk away yourself than to have Charles dismiss you.

"Of course," you said, though your voice sounded strained even to your own ears. "I'll wait for you outside."

Charles shot you an alarmed look as you stood up,”I’ll see you in a few.” Charles’ hand lingered on yours for a moment longer before you reluctantly let go and made your way to the door.

You leaned against your car and enjoyed the wind for a second. You couldn’t help but catch a glimpse of the exchange between your boyfriend and his best friend sitting inside.

You were half scared to find them kissing or something but, instead a sense of confusion washed over you as you watched the way Pippa was angrily point a finger at Charles and scream at him.

It was a second later when she stormed out before making her way towards you.

"Is he doing this because of you?!" Pippa's accusatory tone sent a shiver down your spine, her words hitting too close to home.

Before you could even process what was happening, Charles emerged from the cafe, his expression determined as he approached you and Pippa.

"Go home, Pippa," he said firmly, his voice leaving no room for argument as he intertwined his hand with yours.

Pippa's eyes blazed with anger, her fists clenched at her sides as she glared at Charles. "You will regret this, Charles!" she spat before storming off, leaving you both standing there in stunned silence.

Once Pippa was out of sight, you turned to Charles, your heart pounding in your chest. "What was that all about?" you asked, your voice trembling slightly.

Charles sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked at you with apologetic eyes. "I'm sorry you had to witness that, Y/N. Pippa has been... difficult lately."

You frowned, your mind reeling with confusion and frustration. "Difficult how?"

Charles hesitated for a moment, his gaze searching yours as if trying to find the right words. "She's been pushing boundaries, trying to come between us. But I won't let her." 

"Hey," he continued, taking your hand in his. "I told Pippa that I wouldn't be spending time with her alone anymore. If she can't accept you, then it's better for us to not be friends at all."

You blinked in surprise, a rush of gratitude flooding through you at his words. "Really?"

Charles nodded, squeezing your hand gently. "Really. You're the most important person in my life, and I won't let anyone come between us."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him, holding him close. "Thank you, Charles. I appreciate you standing up for us."

He smiled softly, squeezing your hand reassuringly. "I'll always stand up for us, Y/N. You mean everything to me."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you threw your arms around him, holding him close. Despite the lingering bitterness and resentment, you couldn't deny the overwhelming love you felt for him in that moment.

Lando Norris

As you stepped out of the taxi, the cool night air enveloped you, offering a moment of respite from the whirlwind of emotions that had engulfed you throughout the evening.

Your heart still felt heavy with the weight of Lando's hurtful words, but beneath the pain, a numbness resided- knowing deep down that you might’ve just broken up with your boyfriend.

Before you could take another step, you heard the sound of hurried footsteps approaching from behind. Turning around, you saw Lando rushing towards you, his eyes filled with remorse and his expression wrought with sorrow. Your hand instinctively went to your chest, trying to calm the rapid beating of your heart.

"Y/N, please wait," he called out, his voice pleading as he reached your side, breathless from his haste.

You pulled your face to meet his eyes, uncertainty and wariness etched into your features as you met his gaze. Part of you yearned to turn away, to shield yourself from the pain of his words, but another part couldn't help but hope that maybe, just maybe, he was sincere in his apology.

"Lando," you said softly, your voice tinged with a mixture of hurt and apprehension. You wanted to say more but the damn ball in your throat stopped you doing so.

He took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours as he searched for the right words to express the depth of his regret. "I know I messed up, Y/N. I hurt you, and I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for that."

His words washed over you like a soothing balm, offering a sliver of comfort. But still, you couldn't bring yourself to let go of the hurt that lingered in your heart.

"I should have been there for you tonight, supporting you and showing you how much you mean to me," Lando continued, his voice filled with genuine remorse. "Instead, I let my own selfishness and insecurities get in the way, and for that, I am truly sorry."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you listened to him, the sincerity in his voice echoing the ache in your own heart. You were sure you’ll regret letting go of this amazing relationship without at least attempting to work on it.

Despite the pain he had caused you, you couldn't help but feel a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance to rebuild what had been broken.

"I don't expect you to forgive me right away, Y/N," Lando said softly, his hands shaking and showcasing the intensity of his vulnerability.

"I know I have a lot of work to do to earn back your trust and your love. But please, just give me a chance to make things right. I promise to do whatever it takes to show you how much you mean to me, every single day for the rest of my life."

His words hung in the air, heavy with sincerity and remorse, leaving you torn between the desire to hold onto the pain of the past and the hope for a brighter future. As you gazed into his eyes, searching for any hint of insincerity or deceit, all you found was raw honesty and unwavering devotion.

With a heavy heart and a flicker of hope, you reached out to take his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. "I don't know if I'm ready to forgive you just yet, Lando," you whispered, your voice trembling with uncertainty.

Lando takes a step closer, gently cupping your face in his hands. "I'll spend every moment proving I'm worthy of your love, Y/N. Let me show you how much you mean to me, starting from this moment. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust, even if it means giving you the space you need. Just know that I'm here for you, whenever you're ready."

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

[sugurus-thoughts]

heaven-sent

pairing: suguru geto x reader!

themes/content : slightly curse user suguru geto (not a curse user anymore), angst, comfort and love

word count : 6,0k

a/n : hi everyone, this is my first post. Grateful to @starmapz for guiding me through this space and @adornedwithlight for her beautiful dividers. I hope my page becomes a place you enjoy visiting 🤍

“For all the hurt I’ve caused,

For all the pain I’ve sown,

For every scar I’ve carved,

For every silent groan,

Oh, merciful Lord, I plead,

Will you ever forgive my soul?

Can your grace mend the wreckage,

And make this sinner whole?”

“You have been staring at the moon for a long time”, Y/N turned around only to see her beautiful boyfriend Suguru walk up to her from behind. She smiled softly as he kissed the top of her head.

“Sorry did I wake you ?”,only for her to turn around and hug him

“No you didn't… - he smiled cheekily

or maybe you did cause the bed felt empty without you yes” he replied softly. He knew she was crying; he could tell by the way her eyes shone and by how gloomy they looked.

“Care to tell me what’s on that beautiful mind of yours?” her smile immediately faded as he asked her that question.Still wrapped in each other's embrace she just mumbled at his question,of course Suguru being who he is just sighed knowing how she doesn’t easily open up or to be fair she just hates bringing others into her world .

“Love,let's just go back to bed. Sorry for waking you” she said apologetically. And just like that, the selfishness of her made Suguru erupt.

“Y/N, when are you going to let me in?”he asked with a much more serious tone.She let go of him,only for him to grab her arm.

“Suguru …please I am okay” she answered,but he could hear in her voice that she was close to breaking again. And this only upset him more because she knew how much he cared for her. Only a fool could let this pass so swiftly. This whole week he could sense her sinking into her usual depressive state but knowingly she tends to hide it,the moment he slips through that door she lets go. The tears,the hurt,the guild is what consumes her heart. For she was not able to forgive herself.

“You think I’m blind for not noticing how you've been slipping away from me again” He raised his tone slightly. The pain for him to see her like this was unbearable,and not to mention how hopeless he felt in that moment as a lover, not even being able to help .

“I …didn't want to bother you..you already had so much going on…” she tried to continue but it only led to her tears falling and her falling to the ground. She started mumbling sorrys,only for Suguru to catch her falling state.

Hurt…

Everything collapsed in an instant, like the heavy stillness before a storm's first strike. He exhaled a sigh, a weary whisper against the torrent of anguish pouring from her eyes. It was the way she clung to him—desperate, as though he were the last tether to a world unraveling. It was the way her cries tore through the silence, raw and unrelenting, yet fractured, as though each sob was a plea whispered to the heavens, a broken mantra echoing the weight of all she could not say.

As every minute passed by, he could feel her breathing slow down, her heartbeat starting to ease down as the silence seeped through. He held her close,and just as she was about to utter a word,he picked her up.

“We can talk about it when we get in bed,okay?”.She nodded,as he carried her to the bed only to lay her down softly on the mattress and as he did, their eyes connected for the first time in a while. The bloodshot red eyes made his whole world shatter. He wiped away a few tears as he kissed her eyelids. A sigh escaped his lips as he whispered,like it was a secret only between two lovers.

“I love you no matter what Y/N,you know that right ? - , while he continued to fix her tear stained face “and that is why it pains me to see you do this to yourself,it hurts me more that anything”

Silence filled the room once again. Suguru always knew about suffering. He knows that feeling that seems to tackle you down once you regain happiness. It was how the world works, right? After losing everything he had, after killing so many ....all the souls that haunted him in the past,the sleepless nights, all the negativity. But that was when he met you, a young lady in her mid twenties, a brilliant engineer that approached him due to her curiosity on “why he loved coming to the same café to buy the same cup of coffee every time” . The moment their eyes met it was like he could see the light again, a light that has been long lost for years now. It was like an angel stood before him and had forgiven his sins so easily swept under the sheer light that she represented,he could not utter a word. In that very moment he knew that he was saved by an angel.

His angel.

“Suguru..”

His name barely above whisper. Her hand against his cheeks as he savoured that feeling.

“I'm sorry for not opening up,I had no idea you felt that way. It's just …- ” She looked away for a moment before he lightly nudged her chin to continue. Her eyes began to tear up again.

“ You have been through so much and I do not want you to carry my burdens along with yours. We have both been through tremendous difficulties and I truly don't want you to -” before her final word could be verbalized she could feel the lips of her lover on hers. He cupped her face, as she let out a soft whimper. The kiss was purely out of love and mostly admiration. As lips collided sweet nothings were being whispered by Suguru as he held her ever so tightly. Suguru was never one to rush things and when it came to you, he sure took his time to treasure the one he loved most. With one final kiss his beautiful forest brown eyes opened to look at yours.

“ I want you to remember that you and I are bound to one another. That means that you ought to share your feelings and troubles with me Y/N. You… - ” his eyes shifted from light brown to hazel, as the moon started to hit them directly.

“You are my everything and it truly hurts me to see you this way Y/N. You deserve more than anything in this world and that is why I want you to open up to me,open your heart to me Y/N. I.. I love you” One final admission you could only see how he was holding back tears. This man has lost so much but yet he still has such a wonderful heart.

How did you get so lucky?

After years of wandering alone in this world full of emptiness. You always thought of love, if you'd ever find it. But after scraping the courage to ask a question to the man that always looked too detached from this world, you couldn't be more thankful and that was truly the beginning of how your life changed.

“I love you too Suguru” as you closed the distance by wrapping your warm body around him. He held you tighter just to make sure this wasn't a dream. Hours have passed as you felt yourself slip into the hassiness of sleep but not before you heard him whisper

"I will forever be the heaven you deserve, my angel."

To stand in his presence was to feel a wholeness you never thought possible —

as though the fractured pieces of your soul found their home in his embrace.

To be human, in all its raw and aching beauty,

was a gift you had long denied yourself,

and love was a distant dream,

a myth whispered by those who had never felt the coldness of solitude.

And yet, somehow, he found you,

a light breaking through the thickest of darkness,

a soul intertwining with yours as though destiny had carved his name beside yours in the stars.

In his gaze, you learned what it meant to exist,

to breathe, to belong,

and to be loved so deeply, you could no longer imagine the world without him.

He was not just a presence;

he was your redemption,

your sanctuary,

the heaven you had always deserved.

He was Suguru Geto after all.

do not copy or translate my work.

ps: artwork does not belong to me.

[anyasathenaeum]

Cherish You (Vash x Reader smut)

A/N: Hey guys, I'm back from the dead after one hell of a time. Anyways, literally nobody asked for this, I just felt like writing this because Vash is the loml and he deserves to be loved and be given lots of orgasms. I'm still awful at writing smut so please don't perceive me okay thanks bye Warnings: MINORS DNI, AFAB!reader (female terms used), smut (lots of it), P in V sex, unprotected sex (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT, FOLKS), overall loving & tender sex, restraints, riding, praise, a hint of angst (poor baby Vash struggles with his self-worth), reader doesn't cum (intentionally), crying Word Count: 4.8k

You had known Vash long and well enough to know when he was having a bad day, just like he was today.

While it may not have been obvious to others, with his troubles well-hidden behind his bright smile and goofy personality, you could see past it all to notice the pain in his eyes. His smile, while blinding to others, was hollow to you, and his goofiness seemed slightly more exhausted and strained than usual, as if he were overexerting himself to keep up the façade of everything being alright.

Sure enough, when the two of you had retreated to the safety of your room in some shabby little inn for the night, the carefully curated mask that Vash wore chipped off piece by piece, revealing the wounded, tortured soul of the man underneath it all. The man who believed he deserved nothing good in this world, that only sadness and evil and death would follow him until the end of time.

The man that you loved more than anything.

"Vash..." You called softly to him, kneeling down in front of him as he sat on the edge of the bed.

You gazed up worriedly into his face, a face so beautiful and yet so marred by pain that didn't belong there.

"Don't worry, Mayfly," Vash replied immediately, looking at you with a weak and tired smile, "I'll bounce back in the morning. I just... don't feel too good right now. I'm sure some rest will fix me right up."

"Don't give me that, Stampede," you retorted immediately, feeling frustration rise within you as you reached up and cupped your lover's face in your hands gently yet firmly. "I'm the one person in this world who can see through your lies. You know that."

Your words, while meant kindly, still made Vash flinch slightly, his eyebrows furrowing as he squeezed his eyes shut and let out a heavy sigh. He had no answer to your words, which was an answer in itself - he'd been caught in his blatant lie and he knew it. You knew him better than anybody else, so why did he even bother trying to brush you off, to convince you that he was fine when he was far from it?

You could tell that Vash was struggling with trying to voice what was bothering him, so you waited patiently, your thumbs gently stroking his cheeks as you granted him the time and space to find his voice. Instead, you focused on taking in every little detail of his face - his fluffy blonde hair, his beautiful and expressive blue eyes, his soft lips, the curve of his nose, the mole under his eye, every little piece of him.

"I... I can't protect you, (Y/N). Nothing I do ever seems to stop all the death and anguish that seems to haunt me. Nothing I do is good enough. I lose everything and everyone. I'm afraid... that one day, I'll lose you to it all, too. I can't risk losing you, (Y/N). Not you. Never you. You're... you're the one life I can't ever part with, and you're the one person I never deserved."

Vash's words echoed through the empty room, filled with such fear, pain, heartbreak and love that you felt your eyes begin to sting slightly. You looked up just to see the infamous outlaw gazing down at you, his blue eyes watery and filled with the same emotions you'd heard in his voice.

"Shut up."

You couldn't stop yourself, your tone quiet but your words filled with an underlying anger as they spilled forth, your whole body trembling.

"Shut up, Vash. Stop talking like that, you hear me? You deserve love and happiness and peace. Nothing less than any of that. I chose you. My heart chose you, and it continues to choose you each and every day that I live on this planet. It deemed you worthy. So, I don't believe what you're saying for a second. I love you, Vash. I always have. No matter what happens or what has happened, I love you. I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me, Stampede. Understood?"

Vash's gaze never left you, not even for a second as you spoke, his blue eyes widening at your words and a few tears slipping down his cheeks as he took in what you had said to him. His brain struggled to comprehend how you could possibly love him as much as you did while his heart practically sang in his chest, calling out to its other half that lived in your chest.

As Vash sat there on the side of the bed, seemingly frozen in place, you stood up before pulling Vash tightly into your arms, holding him as close as you possibly could against you, pressing kisses into his soft hair. After a moment or two, you felt Vash's arms wrapping around you in return, one warm and one cold as he pressed you against him, his face burying itself into your belly as he took comfort from you.

You could feel him trembling as he clutched onto you, his fingers digging slightly into your skin as he held you close, soft, shaky whispers of "I love you. I love you, Mayfly" escaping him against your skin as Vash struggled not to cry.

You ran your fingers through his blonde hair, the tips of your fingers just grazing over his scalp in a soothing, gentle motion, attempting to soothe the love of your life as best as you could. You could feel Vash calming slowly, his breathing evening out and his trembling subsiding as he breathed in your familiar scent and took in your comforting warmth and gentle touch.

"Hang on a second," you murmured to Vash gently once he had calmed, stepping away from him for a moment and causing him to whine loudly in protest at the lack of your embrace and warmth.

You quickly stripped off your clothes, piece by piece, as quickly as you could until you were completely bare before walking back over to Vash, whose eyes were wide in surprise at your sudden nudity, a slight blush spreading over his cheeks.

You giggled at the sight of the colour rising in Vash's cheeks, "Why are you blushing, my love? You've seen me naked many times."

"I've also seen the suns rising over the dunes many times in my life, Mayfly. Doesn't make it any less beautiful every time I see it. Just like you," Vash replied, his eyes taking in every bit of your body as you stood before him.

Now, you were the one blushing, looking off to the side for a moment before smiling lovingly at the man sat before you. You reached out and took Vash's flesh-and-blood hand into yours, intertwining your fingers with his gently before guiding his hand to your breast, letting it rest on your skin. You heard a shaky little breath escaping him as his hand cupped your breast oh-so-gently, and you couldn't help but smile bigger when you saw how Vash gazed at you, as if you had hung the stars in the sky yourself.

"Let me show you how much I love you, Vash," you whispered softly, your tone gentle yet firm. "Please. Let me cherish you."

Vash swallowed softly, nodding his head slowly in consent as he looked up into your eyes, heat and desire beginning to course through his body. Sex was nothing new between the two of you at this point, but something about how you were looking at Vash and how you spoke to him made him feel like something was going to be different this time.

And sure enough, as Vash reached to pull his shirt off, you quickly stopped him, your smaller hand wrapping around his bigger wrist as best as it could. You shook your head at him, smiling softly when you were met by a confused grin from him.

"I want to take care of you. Completely," you explained, a hint of heat rising to your face.

Vash blushed even darker than before at your words, but nodded assent as he let go of his turtleneck, allowing for you to take over just as you had wanted.

Slowly, silently, with nothing but loving touches and gentle caresses, you worked Vash's shirt off of him, then his boots, his holsters, his pants and his socks, leaving him in just his boxers. Your diligent and tender work of undressing him had already affected him, given the very obvious tent in Vash's underwear and the wet spot darkening and growing on the fabric.

"Sit against the headboard, please," you directed Vash gently, waiting for him to follow your request.

The Humanoid Typhoon seemed a little confused by this, but he nodded as he did as you asked, shifting so his back was resting against the headboard, with him sitting up in the bed. Vash seemed gently restless, unsure of your next move, but he trusted you with his heart and soul.

You were his best friend, his other half, his soulmate. You were the only person who had ever seen him this vulnerable, the only person who knew what Vash sounded like as he cried out and moaned in the throes of passion, the only person who knew what he tasted like. You were the only one who ever felt him inside them, the only one who had been filled by him over and over again as he moaned out confessions of love for you against your skin, the only person who would ever be with Vash that way. He belonged to you heart, body and soul, just as you did to him.

Without a word, you crawled into the bed towards Vash, making your way over to him until you were straddling his lap, your pussy grinding oh-so-gently against Vash through his boxers, pulling a hiss from his lips, his hands coming to grip onto your hips, clenching onto you tightly.

"M-Mayfly! S-Sensitive!" Vash whined out, trying to take deep breaths and calm himself, a wave of pleasure coursing through his veins as you continued to grind against him.

"I know," you cooed gently, continuing your gentle grinding as you watched Vash's expressions carefully, seeing the pleasure he was getting from your touch.

You reached over and took Vash's wrists in your own, removing his hands from your hips and bringing them up gently against the headboard, next to his head. His eyes widened as he watched you hold him, and another soft whine escaped his lips as he tried to grind against your bare pussy, clearly wanting to feel more of you.

"Not fair... wanna feel you, (Y/N)..." Vash pouted at you, gazing at you as you smiled a bit mischievously at him.

"I asked you to let me take care of you, Vash. This is part of that," You replied softly, stopping your movements altogether and making Vash groan in slight frustration at the lack of friction. "Stay here, just like this. Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do, Mayfly," Vash replied, panting softly as he tried to move his hips against you, his entire body aching for just a hint of friction from you.

You giggled as you got off of Vash entirely, teasing him further as you stood up off the bed, making Vash groan even louder, his frustration building as he whined you name, "(Y/NNNNN)!"

You couldn't help but continue to laugh softly as you dug through Vash's bag, looking around for something in particular before letting out a triumphant "Aha!" as you found what you were looking for.

Glancing over at Vash, you grinned softly and said, "Close your eyes, please."

Vash rolled his eyes playfully but conceded, closing his eyes as you made your way back to the bed, getting back into Vash's lap and straddling him once more. Gently, you took the piece of rope you had pulled from Vash's bag and tied Vash's hands to the headboard, being careful to be gentle with him and making him comfortable. When you were done with your work, you smiled softly and sat back in Vash's lap.

"There. Open your eyes, love."

Vash opened his eyes, looking over at his hands to see the ropes now binding him to the bed, and his eyes widened in surprise to see what you'd done.

"M-Mayfly? What is this?"

"You always focus on everybody but yourself. Tonight, I want to focus on just you, Vash. I want to make you feel good, I want to make you feel loved. The way I'm doing that is by ensuring you can't focus on anything but what you're feeling. Okay?"

Your voice was gentle yet firm, your words loving as you explained to the love of your life what you were hoping to do, and you could see the blush on Vash's face darkening as you explained what you wanted to do, his heart fluttering in his chest at your genuine desire to make him feel loved.

With a nod from Vash, you proceeded to gently work his underwear off of him, finally allowing his cock to spring free, already rock hard and throbbing slightly in time to his heartbeat. Globs of precum leaked from the head, dribbling down his shaft just from the few touches you had shared with him, and you felt a spike of desire and confidence go through your body at the sight of just how badly Vash wanted you.

"God, Vash... you're so beautiful," you murmured softly, tracing your hands slowly down Vash's body, taking your time with each and every scar that littered his body.

You knew Vash was sensitive about his scars, about how mutilated and broken his body looked, but to you, he was nothing short of angelic, a being of beauty beyond compare. You loved every tiny piece of him, scars and all, and you wanted to ensure that Vash understood that, that that knowledge was engraved in his soul.

A soft little whine escaped Vash as you traced down his body, your fingertips grazing over his scars with a featherlight touch, and all he could think about was just how badly he wanted to hold you, kiss you, and touch you. Vash found himself tugging against the ropes holding his hands in place, but you giggled softly and leaned in towards him, your lips teasingly a mere few centimeters away from his.

"Ah, ah, ah... no touching, Vash. Tonight's about you," You scolded him playfully.

Vash simply whined, his blue eyes filled with a mixture of pleasure, pleading and frustration, wanting nothing more than to feel you against him, to be able to hold you and touch you to his heart's content. While you weren't fully going to give into his pleading puppy-eyes, you decided that you would allow yourself to rest against him, straddling him once again and now grinding your bare pussy against the sensitive skin of his cock, a soft gasp escaping Vash's lips as he finally felt you against him.

You began to move slowly, biting your lip and letting out soft, muffled moans of pleasure as your soaked folds glided over Vash's cock, his tip nudging your clit with each thrust of your hips. You could feel Vash tensing against you, soft whimpers and pants escaping his lips as he strained against the ropes restraining him once more as you rubbed your pussy against him. The fact that he couldn't hold you as you moved against him and teased him like this was driving him crazy. Vash knew that he could easily break free from the ropes restraining him from you, but instead, he allowed you to continue your thrusts, opting instead to get lost in the pleasure you were giving him.

"B-Beautiful," you moaned against Vash's throat, pressing soft, wet, open-mouthed kisses to his skin as you continued to press your pussy against his cock, rocking back and forth with a bit more pressure, "You're so beautiful, Vash. S-So beautiful, and so good... God..."

Your loving praise mixed with such sensual and intimate touches made Vash shudder in a way you had never felt him before, his head slumping against your shoulder as you felt his whole body tensing, a loud moan escaping him as you felt his cock throbbing against your pussy.

"M-Mayfly, ha-ah! I- I'm gonna-... I'm gonna cum!" Vash cried out, his body trembling slightly against you as he felt his orgasm approaching faster than it had ever done so before.

"Cum for me, my love," you encouraged Vash gently, continuing your gentle praise and bringing your fingers up to his hair, tugging it gently as you pulled him into a passionate kiss, finally giving him a taste of you. "That's it. Cum for me. I love you. Cum for me."

With a soft cry of your name against your lips as he returned your kiss with equal passion and need, you could feel Vash coming undone beneath you. His cum spurted all over your cunt, coating both your folds and his abdomen with his seed as his orgasm washed over him, wave after wave of pleasure washing over him. Vash closed his eyes as he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, panting heavily as he struggled to recover from his orgasm.

You continued running your fingers through Vash's hair as he snuggled into you, cooing to him gently as you held him close to you, "Breathe slowly, my love. Deep breaths... that's it. You did amazing. I love you so much."

Vash shivered slightly in your hold, pulling back a bit to look into your eyes, his eyes wide and his cheeks flushed from your praise and the overwhelming pleasure he was feeling. As you shifted in Vash's lap, you quickly realized that despite cumming mere moments ago, his cock was still rock hard and throbbing once again, clearly still aching for you.

"(Y-Y/N)..." Vash panted softly, looking up at you with need and slight desperation, his tone and his gaze indicating how much he still wanted and needed you.

You didn't respond, instead leaning down and pressing another softer and gentler kiss against Vash's lips, your hands gliding down his body slowly. As you reached the base of Vash's cock, you sat up a little and guided Vash to the tight ring of muscle at the entrance of your core, sinking down slowly and pushing the tip of Vash's cock into you.

The moment he entered you, a loud whine escaped Vash's lips as a gasp escaped from you, the feeling of him stretching you out and filling you making you see stars as you settled into his lap, allowing him to fully bottom out within you.

"I love you," Vash began to babble softly the moment he felt your pussy clenching down around him, his face burrowing into your neck once again as he pressed desperate kisses against your skin, frantically beginning to thrust up into you in order to feel more of you around him, "I love you so much, (Y/N), you feel so good, please... please... I need you. I want you, (Y/N), please... God, I love you."

"I love you, too, Vash. I love you so much," you moaned softly in return, pressing your palms against Vash's chest to steady yourself as you began to bounce in his lap, driving his cock deeper and deeper into you.

Endless praise spilled forth from your lips as you drove Vash deeper and deeper into you, your pussy tightening around him as he brushed that perfect spot deep inside you with each thrust. Any and all thoughts left your mind except for wanting to make Vash cum over and over again while telling him how good he was, how perfect and how beautiful, how much you loved him and how good he made you feel.

"You're everything t-to me," you gasped out, grinding down on Vash and driving his cock even deeper into you, your cunt milking him and pulling endless whines and moans from his lips as you did so, "You're my world, Vash. My universe. I-I love you, I'll always love you."

The sounds escaping Vash changed suddenly, his whines and moans suddenly becoming soft whimpers and little hiccups, and you could feel his body trembling against you in a way unlike before. As you pulled away to look at him, you realized that Vash was crying in your embrace, crystalline tears coursing down his cheeks as he looked up at you, his bottom lip quivering as he tried not to sob openly.

"Vash..." you whispered softly, slowing your movements and bringing your hands up to cup his face gently, brushing away his tears, your heart aching at the sight of his tears. "Shh... it's alright."

Vash wasn't entirely sure why he was crying - you were in the middle of making him feel amazing, and yet, as he heard your words, words of love and tenderness and devotion, he suddenly felt overwhelmed by it all. How did somebody whose hands were as stained with blood as his end up with somebody as incredible, kind and pure as you? How did your heart belong to somebody like him? Thoughts swirled endlessly through his mind, his emotions overwhelming him as you sat in his lap, holding him close and caressing his face gently.

"Look at me, love."

Your voice was gentle yet insistent, tilting his face up so Vash could look you in the eyes. You pressed gentle kisses all over his face, untying Vash's hands from the headboard and allowing him to finally wrap his arms around you tightly, clutching onto you tightly as he buried his face into your bare chest, soft sobs escaping him as he held you close.

"I l-love you s-so much," Vash whimpered softly against your skin, holding you as close to him as he possibly could as his emotions overwhelmed him. "I'm sorry, (Y/N)... I-I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, my love," you replied immediately, kissing his face gently, "You're allowed to feel overwhelmed. It's okay. I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

Another soft sob escaped Vash's lips, but instead of burying his face into you, he tilted his face up and pressed his lips to yours in a passionate, emotional and surprisingly tender kiss, his hands tangling in your hair as he pulled you against him. This kiss was Vash's way of showing you just how much he needed you, how much you meant to him, how much he loved you and never wanted to be parted from you for as long as he lived. Vash's heart ached for you, wanting nothing but to spend the rest of his life by your side, loving you, making love to you, protecting you and being happy with you, if only the universe would allow it.

A sudden upward thrust from Vash in the middle of your tender moment made you gasp against his lips, the feeling of the tip of his cock brushing against that perfect, gummy spot inside of you making your whole body shudder in his grasp. His movements were slow and deliberate, ensuring both of you could feel him thrusting every inch into you as he kissed you and held you close. Both of you moaned and whined against each other's lips, and you began to grind your hips against Vash's in time with his thrusts, somehow driving him even deeper than before.

"L-Love you," Vash borderline sobbed against your throat, "I lo-love you, Mayfly. Love you so m-much, (Y/N)."

You felt your orgasm beginning to build as Vash continued his thrusts, and you matched his tender and loving movements, trying to focus on him rather than on the pleasure you were feeling. You decided then and there that you would forfeit your pleasure in favour of ensuring Vash was looked after rather than him looking after you. You reached down and pressed down on Vash's hips, silently asking him to stop his thrusts as you continued your own movements, wanting to make him feel good.

"I love you," you gasped out softly in reply, grinding and bouncing slowly and more intentionally in Vash's lap, plunging his cock deeper and deeper into you and pulling the most beautiful sounds from him. "I love you more than anything. I'll always love you, Vash. Always. You're mine and I'm yours."

A strangled sound, half a sob and half a whine, escaped Vash's throat suddenly as he clutched onto you, pulling you down hard into his lap and holding you flush against him with incredible strength as he buried himself inside you completely, "(Y-Y/N)!"

With the cry of your name, you felt Vash spill himself inside you, his cock throbbing as his seed coated your walls in white and spilled out of you as he filled you more than he ever had before, the sticky substance pooling on Vash's thighs. His whole body was shaking against you as he came down from his orgasm, his heart pounding as he tried to calm himself down and recover from it all.

"It's okay, love," you whispered gently, embracing Vash and holding him against you tightly, letting his head rest against your chest as your orgasm slipped away from you, your pleasure disappearing. "I love you, it's okay, Vash. Breathe. I've got you."

Vash's breathing slowed gradually, his eyes sliding shut as he rested against you for a moment until his body suddenly stiffened and he sat up, his eyes wide and filled with concern as he looked at you in alarm.

"(Y/N), wait... wh-what about you?! You didn't-!"

"And I'm not going to," you cut Vash off gently yet firmly, "I'm not interested in my own orgasm right now, Vash. I just want to focus on you, love. Not me. I told you that from the beginning, didn't I?"

"But this isn't fair! You've made me cum twice, a-and... I've done nothing for you in return!" Vash exclaimed, his expression borderline upset as he took your face in his hands, looking at you worriedly.

You couldn't help but laugh at how endearing Vash was, and you kissed the palms of his hands before placing your hands overtop of his on your cheeks, intertwining your fingers with his.

"It's not a big deal, Vash," you laughed softly, gazing at him with tenderness and love.

"It is to me!" Vash exclaimed immediately, frowning and pouting as he tugged you closer to him.

"How about this, then? Let me take care of you for a little while longer, and then, afterwards, if you still want to, you can do what you'd like to make me feel good. Deal?" You offered, cocking your head to the side as you gazed at the love of your life.

"Deal."

Vash didn't hesitate to take you up on your offer before leaning in and kissing you again, this kiss gentle, loving and sweet rather than lustful and passionate. His embrace was strong, yet gentle, and as Vash held you close, he felt an overwhelming sense of true peace for the first time in what felt like a lifetime. In loving him and cherishing him as you had, not just tonight but every day before this, you had shown Vash what he meant to you. You had shown him just how much you loved him and believed in him, and it made his heart swell and break simultaneously.

"I don't know how somebody like me could ever deserve somebody as precious as you."

Vash's words made your heart ache in your chest, and you shook your head resolutely as you pressed your forehead to his, closing your eyes and taking a deep, slow breath before answering, "You deserve so much more than just me, Vash. You deserve the world."

"You are my world, (Y/N). You always have been and always will be, for as long as I live."

You couldn't help but kiss Vash once again, wanting nothing but to spend the rest of your life burrowed in his embrace, but you pulled away so you could clean both yourself and him off and continue taking care of him.

"Come on, my love. I'll run you a bath and you can soak your muscles. You've worked hard, you need to rest," you offered gently, standing from the bed and heading to the bathroom to do as you suggested.

Vash sighed happily as he slumped back against the headboard and watched you walk to the bathroom, a blush on his cheeks and a goofy little smile on his face. His heart was still awash with a flurry of emotions and residual pleasure, but the most prominent thing he felt in that moment was overwhelming love for you as he let out a quiet whisper that nobody but he could hear.

"Gods, how I love you, Mayfly. I will spend a thousand lifetimes trying to deserve you."

[bweeeb]

JEALOUS

Part two

Theodore Nott x Y/n Millicent reader

Friends to lovers- ANGST

Summary: The morning after the damage has already been done is always the hardest to fix things between two best friends who feel more than friendship.

The feeling of discomfort was the second worst feeling for Y/n because the first was feeling strange in a place she used to feel good. And Y/n was almost certain that at that moment, the two feelings were very close to each other.

The morning after, the group skipped breakfast and went straight to lunch. One thing everyone at the table could agree on was that the Slytherin elite seemed very uncomfortable. Sitting on the opposite side of the table from Theodore, Y/n's leg bounced up and down. The image of waking up naked in Mattheo's bed, with Theodore coming out of the shower, remained vivid in her mind as a source of discomfort. It felt strange for both of them not to be sitting side by side, especially after a party, a time when they would typically look out for each other.

Y/n felt herself sink into the bench, and her appetite diminished immensely. Thus, she pushed her plate away and stood up, anguished.

— Where are you going? Pansy asked, attracting the attention of all her friends.

— I've lost my appetite.

— But where are you going? Daphne asked with concern, her expression resembling that of a child inquiring about their mother, prompting Y/n to offer a weak smile.

— I have things to study. See you later. Everyone agreed with a deadly silence that embarrassed the group but left the rest of the students curious.

— Is she okay? Draco asked Pansy, who showed him the middle finger and got up angrily.

— This is your fault

— I didn't know that….

Daphne sighed and rested her head on the table, feeling a migraine starting to creep in. In a sudden move, Theodore got up from the table not long after Pansy and left the Great Hall quickly.

— Teddy! Anastasia called out. — Teddy bear! Anastasia, who had risen from the Gryffindor table, called to Theodore. He turned to her, much as Y/n had upon entering the Great Hall.— I missed you... I thought we'd see each other later.

— I don't have time for this, Anastasia. Last night was a mistake. Theo gestured with his hands in front of her face, glancing back where Y/n had left as soon as the nickname he used for her in their third year allowed her to call him.

��� Fuck.

— Teddy?

— Don't call me that.

Theodore said rudely, and Anastasia grimaced.

— Who do you think you're talking to?

— Apparently you, but I wish it weren't.

— Excuse me? The girl stopped in front of Nott, and he, impatiently, placed his hands on her shoulders, not caring if he caused a scene. He needed to get to Y/n and make it clear that what he had done was foolish

— Listen to me, I've fucked a lot of people here and you were just another one. It won't happen again because you're the girl who hurt my best friend, so stop. He growled in her face, and the innocent look faded from Anastasia's expression. She stomped away.

— Oh, Theodore, believe me, no one hurt her more than you did. — she rolled her eyes — She was dying for you to fuck her, that's why it was so fun for me. I could see in her eyes how desperate she was, she seemed like a desperate slut. The redhead smiled maliciously and slapped the boy's face. He snorted and left the Great Hall without worrying about the whispers. He needed to apologize to his girl.

Theodore run as fast as he could to catch up with Y/n, who was still walking slowly down the hallway.— Hey! He shouted and saw the girl shake her head.

— What about our Italian lessons ? — Theo sighed, hating that if he allowed it, tears would fall from his eyes, and those tears would make his father call him ridiculous — Dolcezza…

— I think I'm dead, Theodore, I can't. Y/n rolled her eyes as her voice faltered.

— Don't call me, Theodore, mi amore.

— What should I call you, Theodore? Y/n mocked the boy while trying not to cry.

— Y/n… don't be dramatic, mi amore.

— Dramatic? I'm not being dramatic, Theodore. — Y/n turned abruptly to look at the boy not as far away as she had imagined he would be — Then tell me, tell me what I should call you.

— You should call me... Y/n interrupted Theodore before he could finish his sentence and shook her head with the same whispered tone as his.

—No, I shouldn't. She swallowed hard and looked at him with sad eyes. It was almost inevitable for her to wonder if she was being too dramatic, but that thought soon passed when she remembered her psychology lessons emphasizing the need for time to think.

— Go back to the Great Hall. Her anger softened in her voice when she saw him approaching.

— You are mad at me. — I'm fine!

— You can't be mad at me for what you did too! Theodore frowned and shrugged eagerly.

— You slept with the only person who really hurt me, she killed my cat when he was the only thing that calmed me down because I was away from home. My parents didn't see me for four months. FOUR MONTHS because they believed Nino had a communicable disease and he had nothing and you know it because you heard me cry every night without stopping because I was feeling alone. Y/n clenched her jaw and walked towards the Italian with her finger pointed at his face, which was pushed away when he retorted.

— You fucked up with Mattheo, damn it! Y/n mocked Theodore's argument and rolled her eyes as she walked away again while he followed her frantically.

— Go fuck yourself.

— You slept with Mattheo in my bed! You woke up in MY bed with him by your side. Theo shouted as he stepped in front of the girl, preventing her from continuing her walk.

— And since when do you care about that, Theodore? You fucked every single girl in this fucking school and now when I slept with ONE person you're get mad? — a sob escaped from Millicent's lips as she wrinkled her nose uncomfortably — You can't do this. Her voice became quieter and more vulnerable. — It should have been you, but you decided to sleep with her on my birthday.

— You sat on him in a way that I thought... I thought. Theodore's voice had also lowered in tone, and he looked at her seriously for the first time since the beginning of the discussion.

— It was a damn truth or dare game, we always did stupid things and we both know it means nothing, you fool. If I knew it would hurt you, I wouldn't have done a damn thing… — she murmured — But apparently you don't think the same way.

She turned away again, but this time Theodore just stood there, looking at her back, disappearing down the hallway.

— I would never do anything to hurt you, Y/n. I love you.

Theo shouted from afar, afraid to see her leave. He didn't want her to go like this, but he didn't know how to fix that mess.

— I can't believe you, Theodore, you lied about the dress. About her being at the party and wanting her there, maybe I'm being dramatic, but I can't believe you love me rigth now.

_____

So dramatic, I love it😍

Requests are open, message me if you have any ideas💞

Read the last part here

[weixuldo]

Allow me// ch 13

Vader x Reader

a/n: so this one is kinda short but is necessary for the plot!! we’ll have some vader and reader interactions in the next chapter!!! :) ty for the support!!!

Vader has been gone longer than anticipated…

warnings: cursing, angst, harm, body horror?, cannon typical violence

_____________________

You walked down the brightly lit corridor with a small transport droid behind you; it carried your tool bag and some parts that had to be specially ordered to fix one of the hyper speed engines. 

Once you reached your destination you swiped your security badge and the deep belly of the ship opened its maw to you. The machinery and technology that allowed the vessel to operate was all at the tip of your fingers. 

You had always wanted to come down here and surprisingly you hadn’t ever had a reason to, but before Vader left to meet with his master he noticed the engines had been running at lower parsecs than usual and asked you to take a look. 

The Executor had been docked on Hoth so that you could inspect and repair the engines (otherwise you would be vaporized if you attempted to inspect them while they ran).

You had actually never been to the icy planet and were excited to see a few sights before going back into space. Vader told you that he would take you on a stroll when he got back- he knew how much you loved exploring new systems and biomes (a conversation of one of your many late night talks). 

Hopefully the meeting between Vader and the Emperor went well and you could debrief with V later today.

Earlier you had seen Palpatine’s ship go off to another system, so that seemed to be a good sign.

Though, you hadn’t heard from Vader yet- but it was common for you not to hear from him until later in the day- especially when you had a demanding task; so you didn’t think much of it.

___________________________

Vader’s mind was consumed with painful memories and the anguish his body was currently feeling as he laid on the burning shores of Mustafar.

His prosthetic ports ached and the flames licking at the metal didn't help the surviving skin that surrounded them. 

Half of him was just ready to give up- He had been in this same position before and chose to cling onto life, but what did that life provide him?

Days of pain and suffering in a suit that would be his coffin, mental anguish over the decisions he had made, manipulation from the man he was supposed to be working with… all he was here for was being a weapon of the empire. He didn’t matter. 

All of this re-lived pain because he aided his dead wife’s handmaiden (who knew that he was Anakin and told him Padme’s last words were ”there’s still good in him”).

He didn’t know if there was still good in him- if everytime he attempted to prove his wife’s last words true, he got punished; how would he go on trying to be good?

But on the other hand; why live if there was no good in him- why bring more suffering into the galaxy? 

In his moment of thought the bank of the river started sliding and he felt the heat intensifying by his legs. In defeat he closed his eyes; what else was there to live for?

The last time he was here, Padme was what kept him going. At the time he thought she was still alive and he needed her. He stayed alive for her, he dragged his mutilated body across the burning coals to get back to her. 

He remembered the pain he felt when he found out she had passed… he would not survive news like that again…

In that instance a burst of color flooded the nothingness of his closed eyes; beautiful greens, blues, and purples.

Soon the colors started forming images, images of you. Your smile, your hair, the adorable look on your face when you finished a big project, the look you gave him before falling asleep curled up to his side. 

You. 

He needed to get back to you.

In his panicked state he pushed you far from his mind; never would he want to associate suffering with you. But now he understood, you were his motivation.

His pillar of light, his guiding hand.

His eyes shot open when realized that was a double edged sword; yes, you were his reason to live, but he also knew that his master loved to manipulate him… and he would spare no soul who would give him more power. 

And now Vader wasn’t there to protect you.

As he slipped further down and the flames began to lick at his already burnt skin, his eyes widened and he gripped the gravely bank with all of his might. He was going to come home to you. 

He needed to get back, he needed to make sure Palpatine didn’t do anything drastic (the emperor already intervened in his previous relationship and he would not let that happen again). 

His desperation and worry soon became anger and pure rage- the thought of Palpatine laying a hand on you made Vader livid. 

After he made his grueling crawl up the scolding shores he wasn’t even thinking about his recovery time and procedures he would need done once he got back; all he could think about was making sure you were safe. 

_________________________________

You usually at least saw Vader once a day, even if for only a short period of time, so you were rightfully anxious when you hadn’t seen him in almost 48 hours.

No matter how much you tried to ignore it you couldn't help but worry about him; the other night he told you he had to meet his master, most likely under unfavorable circumstances…

Would the emperor have done something to him? He couldn’t have, Vader was his strongest, right?

Plus Palpatine left the other day…

Your brows knit together as you tried to fall asleep; why were you so worried?

Vader was a grown man who was more than capable of taking care of himself. You just needed to stop being “worst-case scenario”-

Wait. 

You sucked in a sharp breath when you realized that you couldn’t sense Vader’s force signature; the more you thought about it, you hadn’t felt it this whole time- you were too wrapped up in your work to notice. 

But, again… He was perfectly equipped to handle himself…yeah- no need to worry. 

No need.

…

…..

…….

As much as you wanted to believe what you were telling yourself, your gut told you something was wrong. And you’d be damned if you were just going to sit here and let that worry fester. 

You knew the Emperor was scheduled to come back aboard tomorrow morning to oversee a transport. You could act dumb and attempt to coax information out of him; It was definitely a lofty and irrational idea, but what else was there to do?

________________________________

The air was thick with dread and tension as you slowly made your way up to the loading dock with your helper droid that carried your tools. You pretended to tinker with one of the ventilator shafts until Palpatine was within your view. 

After a few shipments were packed and transported, you took a breath and headed towards the emperor. 

Only a few steps away and his sickening yellow eyes landed on you; in a panic you bowed to him and rushed out an apology. 

“Stand, my young friend” he spoke with a curious tone. 

You did as the sith asked and allowed him to examine your features. 

“What troubles you?” he asked, placing a wiry clawed hand on your back. You hold back a shiver. 

“I am one of Lord Vader’s mechanic’s and I have not received another task from him in a few days. I have finished all of my pending duties and I worry the Lord will become angry if he returns and I have not accomplished anything further” you spoke formally and as if you had no idea where he had gone. 

“I was debating whether or not to approach you. I know you are a very busy man, but I also know that you are my Lord’s superior, so you may have a more urgent task I can attend to- I would rather not putter around and waste the empire’s time”.

The hooded man smiled a toothy grin, “Ahh, young one- your ambition pleases me. I may have a task for you, but first what is the other question you wish to ask?”.

You did have another question, but you didn’t think you indicated that you had one.

“Oh, I was just wondering if you knew where my Lord went off to? It’s not like him to disappear without letting his staff know” (that wasn’t entirely true, but you might as well see what you can get out of the old man).

“I’m not sure where he’s gone off to, hopefully he will return to you soon. I can tell he means a great deal to you” the pale man creepily smiled before dismissing himself to attend to other matters. 

Shit. 

Maybe you shouldn’t have said anything. 

_________________________

Vader groaned in pain as the mouse droid he just rewired began to fuse a random droid’s leg to his port; He needed to be able to walk somehow and this is the best he could do as of now. 

He knew it was going to hurt like hell when he would eventually have to get it seared off (He wouldn’t be able to get his new prosthetics on without getting this replacement leg off.)

Once he was relatively put together he prepared himself to hoist himself up. He winced at the pressure of his weight on the unfamiliar legs, but nevertheless, he pressed on.

He made his way through the dingy compound, looking for ways out and back to you. 

Out of the corner of his eye he saw a low level bounty hunter. Did this fool really think he could take Vader? 

Without any effort, Vader slammed the armed man against the opposite wall once he started to get too close.

If there was one, there were more, Vader needed to get out of here before a real threat came his way…

***

a/n: thanks for bearing with me through finals eeekkk sorry i’ve been on an atrocious upload schedule

taglist: @vadersassistant @sxoulohvn @khaleesihavilliard @kashasenpai i @darling-murdock @beautifulbearpolice @salvatoresister1 @lune-de-miel-au-paradis @blueninjablade3 @jujuba096 @missmannequin @jellydodger @mirastark @wyvernthekriger @duckyhowls @monada43 @lauriidoesstuff @vienettacream @ray-rook @itswhatever06 @ilovenielperry

[rougevingirl]

bobal (9) - jenna ortega please? ❤️‍🩹

❝Unfinished Paths❞

Character: Tara Carpenter

Words: 1117

Warnings: none

Wine: Bobal

Number: 9

Prompt: exes to lovers - both ending up in the same small town 8 years later…what could possibly happen?

❝prompts with wine❞

I really tried to write for Jenna, but as the text developed I realized that it was better for Tara, nothing makes much sense, but I hope you like it. There's no happy ending here, just anguish.

"It's so strange that we've ended up here together after all these years, but you still don't want to talk to me. You're just going to spend the whole evening drinking wine and eating takeaway, aren't you?" she asked. You had no idea why you always had to talk about these things now, always at the wrong time. Why couldn't you just get on with it as an adult? 

"Are you sure you don't want to get drunk one last time before you leave for New York? We haven't done that since we graduated from high school." - It was true; you hadn't even realized it until now. Should you have known that your only friend and girlfriend, ex now, would be living in New York City after she finally graduated, after all the turbulent events how could she go on in Woodboro? You should have known that one day that relationship would end and leave a gaping wound in your chest, even after years it still hurt so much... And yet, he didn't seem to care. Could it be that she was so used to it? So used to it that she no longer missed him?  Miss the relationship they had?

No, it wasn't that at all. No. There was something else bothering her. The point was that there was nothing wrong with her. She had always been kind to you, and still was. She was kind and helpful and very pretty. But it was more than that. The way she said things made them seem a little different from what they really were. Not in a bad way, of course, because how would she know what she wanted if her life revolved around the past, around what other people wanted? She probably wouldn't understand that at all, she wouldn't understand herself. It was just that she seemed to expect you to respond in the same way that everyone else did. And that... wasn't right at all.

There was something else wrong with her, you realized now, something beyond all the troubled events of the last few years. The reason you never wanted to think about her again was because you knew exactly what it was. Because you remembered. You had been best friends before graduation. Girlfriends. And then she'd gone to New York City and you'd broken up and then barely talked for months. Now, suddenly, you were back in the same city? What had happened between then and now? Why did you feel so lonely? What was she hiding? What had changed? Why was everything so much easier before than now? Everything was still "the same", but it felt like things had changed so much. Why couldn't you understand? Why couldn't you see the signs? Why couldn't she? Was there a part of her that wasn't even there anymore? Something inside her was gone. You knew that. He had seen it happen many times before. But when? When? Where? Had it been before or after graduation? Had you even had a normal conversation? Or were you the only one who had noticed? It was so strange; you wished you could just ask her the questions you were thinking, but you didn't think she would answer them anyway. And you really didn't want to know.

"I'm sorry to keep bringing it up," she continued. "But it seems that every time I try to mention it, you run away like the plague. Remember our first date? Remember how uncomfortable we were at first? Remember how nervous and awkward we were when we tried to kiss? Can't we just start again?"

Yes. Yes, they could. You remembered. You also remembered that it had been amazing and wonderful, everything that should happen with a first kiss. So why did you feel so miserable now? You looked down at the table, remembering those days. Your eyes fixed on his face before you slowly shook your head in denial. "That's not it at all. We went on lots of dates and kissed several times. Don't get me wrong. I love kissing you. More than anything. And I can promise you that I would never push you away to avoid kissing you." It may have sounded silly, but honestly, you meant every word you were saying. You loved kissing her. It had been the only time you had really felt happy, fulfilled and alive. It had been perfect. And maybe you needed to go out with her to forget about it for a while and create new memories with someone else. Someone other than her. And Tara, someone who wasn't you. "But I can't. I really like you. But I can't..."

She frowned in confusion, also looking perplexed. "Why? If that's really the case, then why are you so determined not to see me, not to be with me?"

Because you couldn't do that. "Because I want to. Very much. I want to see you all the time. But I can't. Because my life is here in Woodsboro. This is my home. And I don't belong anywhere else. I mean, it may sound silly, but I love this town. It's where I belong. My family is here. And my work is here. And my friends are here, and my girlfriend is here..." You stopped when she opened her mouth to speak again. That was very difficult to explain. You had to find some kind of excuse. "And I've decided to stay here, I know everything that's happened has been terrible, but I'm just leaving here to pursue my life in Boston, where my girlfriend's family lives. And maybe I'll go on like this forever. Maybe it's selfish, but I'm not going to let anything else ruin my perfect life here in Woodsboro or Boston maybe..."

She stared at you, clearly not liking the answer that came out of your mouth. Her lips formed an "o", obviously not expecting it. "I see," she finally replied. She stood up abruptly and turned to leave the restaurant. "Well then, I guess we should move on. Goodbye, Y/n. Have a good night."

You said nothing. Simply watched her walk away. You hated yourself so much. You were a coward. It was just that you were afraid. Afraid to accept what had happened before your graduation. Afraid to accept what was happening now. Afraid that maybe it was a big mistake, a sign, something that would change everything. And, above all, afraid that you were falling in love with someone who wouldn't fall in love with who you were now. That was your biggest fear. That you would become just another person she would fall in love with, but who would never be good enough.

© rougevingirl - scream and horror writer

[respectfulkitfistosimp]

The Abode

A Kayn lol x reader fanfic part 6 master list

The walk back to the order was awkward, actually just categorizing it under that word would be an understatement. It was quiet, uncomfortable and full of tension, not even the fun kind of tension, it was the type that would make you look away from your screen when you saw it on TV or the type that would make you so uncomfortable that you'll have to stand up from your seat and take a walk while you consciously breathed away the second hand embarrassment from your system. You couldn't do that though, you could only walk back with those who survived and bite your tongue as to not make any type of remarks, looking away everytime Kayn looked at you or spoke to you. It drove the both of you insane, and not just the both of you but everyone else as well, each time Kayn would say something you would roll your eyes or make a face and as much as the other acolytes found it funny they would rather not deal with a pissed off Kayn, so as a way to fix it when everyone eventually reached the order's HQ they just immediately left for their rooms, it didn't matter whether they had broken bones or not because their plan was to leave the two of you alone, it was almost endearing how people who's job was to kill others could be so understanding of other people's feelings, or rather they just simply didn't want to deal with the whole mess. You obviously protested against it but since no one listened you just simply clicked your tongue and walked to the infirmary, Kayn following right behind you, you just wished he did it silently, bothering you with questions and poking at your arm and shoulder repeatedly until you felt your eyelid pulsate.

—Come on doc, why are you so angry? Did seeing all of that blood make you sick?—he joked, now poking your cheek and officially hitting your limit.

—Why did you kiss me!?—you asked in a mix of distress, anger and light tones of anguish, feeling embarrassed for the outburst shortly after.

—You have been behaving like this just because of that kiss?—he asked with a playful smile, said smile dropping after you nodded, he sighed after—listen, you were just being too loud and I was not in the mood for an earful, that simple.

You clenched your jaw, feeling it pop.

—You never thought about, I don't know, asking me to shut up?—you smiled bitterly.

—They are right, Kayn—you heard a demonic voice talk, one similar to the laughs you had heard on the first day you met him.

You looked at him with eyes wide open in surprise, then remembered who you were talking to and the surprise died down as you let out and exasperated sigh, frankly amazed that this was the first time you had actually heard Rhaast speak and not just laugh.

—Of course I'm right, I'm always right—you pinched the bridge of your nose, starting to get a headache.

—Why are you so worked up over it? It was just a kiss—he said, smirking when it dawned upon him—unless it wasn't just a kiss for you.

You felt warmth rising to your neck and face, not sure whether it was from anger or something else, either way you could feel the gears in your head turning to try and come up with any excuse.

—What do you care if it was or wasn't—you said to buy some time, watching him walk closer and closer to you, not sure whether he was trying to intimidate you or what.

You stood your ground, making a conscious effort not to walk back into the wall, even if the idea of getting backed up was sort of enticing, after all you had a reputation to keep up, what was that reputation exactly? You didn't know but felt as if not getting provoked by his advances was part of it.

—Avoiding the question, I see—he laughed, awfully close to you.

You bit the inside of your cheek, wondering what to do or say. Should you just make a run for it? No, he would obviously catch up to you and make it even more uncomfortable, so should you just admit you've got a massive crush on him? Also no, you would rather die than do that, all of that meant that the only option you had left was to bullshit your way out of this situation, luckily you were a master at it.

—I'm avoiding it because it's a stupid question—you answered, Kayn quirked an eyebrow and you heard Rhaast laugh—it's unethical for a doctor to have romantic feelings for a patient, so yes, it was just a kiss for me.

He sighed and walked back, finally giving you some space as well as giving up, for now. You were also going to add in the fact that he had bad breath but felt as if it was too mean. That was yet another reason why your feelings for him were completely wrong, knowing Kayn he wouldn't care for the ethical part of it but you did, that was the difference between you and him, you had a strong set of morals and ethics that you kept at all times, even if they weren't beneficial for you. You cleared your throat and looked at him up and down, noticing all of the cuts and bruises that could use some more treatment on top of what you did earlier so you pointed with your head towards the direction of the infirmary, Kayn immediately understanding what you meant and following behind you with the slightest bit of disappointment slipping from the turmoil inside of him, weighting in his shoulders as if his emotions suddenly materialized into a bag of cement mix, and you being non the wiser, noticed such weight but thought that it was because he was tired. You started to get a little worried when he didn't make any sort of remarks as you treated him, barely even wincing as you cleaned his wounds, still you made no comment about it as you allowed him to leave immediately after you were done. As he walked back to his quarters the insesant mocking of Rhaast made his blood boil, his fists tightening while some of the veins on his face started to pop, he was obviously angry but he didn't know who he was angry with, maybe it was with himself for being a coward and not following up on his confession, thinking that the kiss, even if it wasn't given in the best moment or in the best way, was enough to show you how he felt, or maybe he was angry with you for being so blind to his advances. Whoever he was angry with mattered less and less as the night arrived, at this point he was starting to get annoyed too to such a degree that all he could do was toss and turn in bed even if he was extremely tired.

You didn't feel to good either, a mix of guilt and shame pooling at your gut and fermenting on it as you treated those who returned from the battle, writing the word "deceased" next to the names of those who didn't return. You sighed as you looked up to the beds of the infirmary, the closed courtains around each bed hiding those who were recovering, you felt slightly optimistic that no one was left without a bed though but still, the weight of those who you had built up a friendship with and didn't return affected your mind and you couldn't help but think about what if one of those had been Kayn, you looked at his name on your notebook and couldn't even fathom how you would feel if you also had to write the word "deceased" next to it. You shook your head and stood up from your chair, recognizing how those feelings weren't healthy for you, you grabbed a piece of paper where you wrote "be back in 5" and left it on top of your desk, leaving the infirmary to make your way to the training ground where Zed was training in the darkness of the night, you extended the report about the losses the order had suffered and the treatments the ones who made it back alive recieved, Zed looked at it for a second before looking at your face, analyzing it, for a man who was also severely emotionally constipated he was frighteningly good at reading other people.

—I understand why you feel that way, believe me—he started—it never gets easy but this is the risk behind our work, mourn those who didn't return but don't let it consume you—he placed one of his hands on your shoulder, something that surprised you—it's also thanks to you that some of them are still alive.

You nodded as you gulped down some of the guilt, thanking him before leaving the grounds and walking back to the infirmary, ready to stay up in case some of your patients needed you but stopping as you started to hear whimpers, your imagination quickly making an immature assumption before the logic set in the it came from one of the rooms, the direction of them coming from behind the door of a room you didn't want to walk inside of. As cruel as it sounded you pondered whether to walk inside or not but ultimately decided to do it, knocking first just in case but since no one answered you just walked inside and came close to the bed, looking at Kayn's shifting body and shiny forehead from sweat, that paired with the noises and blabbering he was making being a clear indication that he was having a nightmare. You put your hand on Kayn's shoulder, shaking it lightly and calling his name, abruptly ending his nightmare causing for his brain to take a second before stopping himself from attacking you out of muscle memory, there where only two people in Runeterra who could wake him up without getting killed, those two being you and Zed.

—Are you okay?—you asked softly, you realized how dumb the question was after speaking it.

Kayn didn't answer, he just nodded, still a bit disorientated.

—Don't lie to me—you scolded him, keeping the soft tone and your hand on his shoulder—you were having a nighmare, a pretty bad one at that—you followed, sitting on his bed—you wanna talk about it? It might help.

He stayed silent for a second before shaking his head 'no', you nodded, not wanting to press on it and make him uncomfortable.

—I understand, but if you wanna talk about it, or just talk about anything I'll be there to listen—you spoke with a warm smile, waiting a second before standing up and starting to walk to the door, being stopped not long after by a tug in your wrist.

—Can you stay?—he asked, looking away from you.

You nodded once more, turning around and getting ready to pull out a chair to sit on it as you waited for him to fall asleep, instead he moved back on his bed, lifting te covers as a clear invite to lay next to him. Your brain stopped working for a second, on the next second you regretted accepting but it was clearly too late to say no, let alone really rude, so you took off your shoes and layed there, so close to the edge of the bed that the slightest movement would make you fall off of it, you heard Kayn mutter a small thank you while yawning before closing his eyes, drifting off to sleep shortly after, you didn't know or undertand why something as simple as this could bring him so much comfort yet you were happy that it did, you also were happy that you got to watch the calm expression on his face as he rested, laughing lightly after hearing some light snores come from him. You quickly catched up to the butterflies on your stomach and lovedumb smile on your face and forced yourself to reationalize this situation straight away to stop your heart from beating so fast, thinking to yourself how this was just another way of taking care of his health by helping him get a goodnight's sleep, the night quickly going away as the sun started to shine, casting its light on the room and on your eyebags from not sleeping on the entire night yet again. You wished you could stay a bit longer but you had already spent to much time in his room, leaving the infirmary and your patients unattended, you moved gently out of the bed trying not to wake him up, putting on your shoes and looking back at Kayn before leaving, wondering what he was dreaming about as you walked the hallways.

—You weren't back in five—said Royce, pulling the courtain back as he stared you down once you opened the door, noticing a long, dark hair strand on your clothes and your also dark eyebags.

—I'm sorry—you answered with an apologetic smile, walking up to him—how are you feeling?

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Dume"

*pulling out more tissues* Anyone still need these? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? I am way too young to be making that joke.

Live reaction version.

As if to rub things in, this episode starts moments after the previous one ended. The fireball is under control, finally, though still burning, and an officer comes up to Pryce to confirm the news:

Kanan is dead.

Pryce knows she's made a mess of things but latches onto this fact as a way to still look good in front of Imperial High Command, deciding to throw a sick kind of celebration for it. In a twisted way, the Jedi also represents "hope" to someone as despicable as Pryce.

Oh man, he doesn't know. He's so happy to see them.

Zeb's first hint that things didn't go as planned is Sabine hurling off her pilot helmet, swiping her eyes angrily as she passes him in complete silence.

And then the near-comatose Hera, dead on her feet, staring up blankly towards the horizon and Ezra shaking his head because he can't help her.

Chopper rushing immediately to Hera's side because he knows her, knows something is horribly wrong.

Zeb grabbing Ezra by the shoulders and he barely reacts to it.

"Kanan's gone." is all he can say, and his anguish when he has to repeat it when Zeb asks for clarification, the anger and sorrow, the way his voice shakes...

And Zeb's expression drops in horror and he wordlessly pulls Ezra into an embrace.

I WANTED THEM TO HUG BUT NOT LIKE THIS.

And Chopper silently holding Hera's hand. :((((

They bring back the white titlecard too, just to remind you we're still in mourning.

It gets a bit lost with everything that happened, but the attack on Lothal's factories? That was two days ago. The disastrous failure and loss of 24! fighters is going to be very fresh on the Alliance's minds, and add Kanan's death to the mix and they absolutely will not risk any more hardware and personnel on Lothal. The Spectres will have to fix things from within, on their own, by themselves.

Which they gradually discover that they have started to. The Alliance's primary goal on Lothal was preventing the Defenders from being manufactured, and Kanan accomplished that. Anything in addition to that is cake topping for the Alliance, Lothal goes back to being one of the thousands of worlds in the Imperial-occupied crowd they have to face down.

They don't know about the Temple. And that's why Lothal also needed Ezra.

Who, after an outfit and scene change, is about to be as functionally useless and paralyzed as Hera.

:(((((((

I was unclear on why the wolves were so angry the first time through. It's clearer now that they're trying to snap Ezra out of his funk, because time is running out and they can't afford for him to sit there and be depressed about things, they need him to move, they need him in action. They're not kind about it, but the reality is not kind, If Ezra does not get himself together, Palpatine will gain the WBW, Lothal will be doomed, everyone will die.

Bit a lot more headcanon-y but also I think the Loth-wolves may have preferred Kanan be the one to enter the WBW and save it? Owing to [gestures to unanswered mystery box about Kanan's past they hinted at]. Maybe? So maybe they were also just a little pissy that their first choice went and got himself killed even after they warned him.

Like I said, speculation and spitballing on my part on that one.

Anyway.

Ezra runs away from the Loth-wolves' attempts to confront him and I already praised it in my first watch but the camerawork is excellent here. Very nicely staged, good insets, good tracking shots, good dollying.

The Loth-wolves actually pause here, waiting, watching Ezra to see what what he'll do. Ezra had the full opportunity to reach out and connect, and talk to them, but he chooses not to, running away again.

So they wind up knocking him out when they knock him down.

Meanwhile at Imperial HQ, good lord that is a lot of smoke. It's literally blurring the edges of the Dome.

Pryce seems very pleased with herself for killing the Jedi. Too bad Thrawn literally doesn't care about that, because he's pissed she let Hera Syndulla escape and also the whole fuel depot thing. Thrawn says he's not in it for glory but I think he does take some personal satisfaction from defeating someone he considers a Worthy Opponent. Hera was his victory and Pryce undid it as soon as he was gone. That has to sting, lol.

And Rukh is grinning like, "Sucks to be you, bitch."

I don't know if we're meant to take Hera's, "Why did I wait so long to tell him?" as being about saying I love you or about being pregnant but I'm going to go with the latter because, again, the suggestion that that was the first time she'd actually told him is dumb and I won't entertain it.

Chopper is so very present for Hera through all this, even when Hera regrets even starting the Rebellion in the first place.

I think a few people have speculated that each of the Spectres represents a stage of grief. Ezra's stuck in a certain kind of Denial, and gets tempted with the Bargaining stage an episode later. Sabine and Zeb are both Anger. Hera is obviously Depression.

Eventually all of them reach Acceptance. Chopper may have already been there.

Zeb is actually the one who notices first that the factories are completely shut down, which is a nice touch.

I can't quite tell if Ezra wakes up in the same location he was knocked out in or if the wolves moved him. He bolts up in a different position so there's room to argue they moved him, possibly on Dume's orders.

Subtle animation appreciation moment: Ezra stumbling like he's falling asleep on his feet.

He looks so tired. And he's stuck. Emotionally and physically.

Maybe that's why he turns to the children's nursery rhyme like he did in Season One's "Path of the Jedi" to try and decide a way forward. But he keeps rejecting the options he lands on. So he does it again. And again.

Until a manifestation of Kanan appears, like it did before, to get him back on track.

Sabine holding back on her Mandalorian revenge instincts, implicitly because of Kanan's Jedi influence. T_T

Watch the sky in this part, you can see the hue shift to purple.

The Dume wolf sniffs him and he immediately stirs with a confused, "Kanan?" ow my heart.

Some Endgame-like trumpets and drums in this part.

Zeb has height and strength going for him here, but Ruhk is so much faster and quicker. Not to mention has the stealth cloaking. Sabine's helmet gives her a leg up on that momentarily until it's knocked off.

Back with Ezra in the wolf-vision and Kanan-as-Dume interacts with Ezra in a very pointed, Force-y way, dragging out the truth from Ezra about why he ran, why he's stuck, what's holding him back.

"You... ran." It sounds almost accusatory. Ezra gives a weak excuse about the wolves chasing him, but upon being pressed again starts letting things out:

I feel lost, I'm afraid, I don't believe in myself without him, I can't do this on my own.

Ezra's grief is tied up and tangled in his self-esteem issues, a bit self-pitying and "woe is me", because without Kanan he doesn't feel brave or strong, he's not special he's not like Kanan.

Who is he but a child, a "boy who was lost", without his wise brave master? He's nobody.

"I am afraid, all right?! I'm afraid. Everything seems so hopeless now."

Frick I need to hug him. :(

Zeb gets a little bit too into his anger when Sabine's exploding paint finally lets them see Rukh enough to smack him good.

Sabine being the voice of mercy when there aren't Jedi around to do it. :(((((

Back with Ezra and the wolves have given him the keystone and finally explain what the deal is: The Jedi Temple is in grave danger. Secrets and knowledge lie within, that the Empire cannot get hold of. Those words are not a coincidence. We're meant to think back to Malachor, to where it first all went wrong, as Ezra's sentiment goes.

Still not quite sure why the Dume wolf had to bite Ezra out of his vision but Imma chalk it up to another mysterious wolf thing.

Ezra immediately yelling out for Kanan tho. :(

Sabine and Zeb like troublesome siblings pulling a prank as they send Rukh off painted and humiliated lol.

Meanwhile Hera has added a new bead to the Kalikori, representative of Kanan and using a piece that looks like a Jedi holocron shard.

Sabine looks so genuinely happy here.

Ezra's functional enough for now, so he's back too, and we end on the cliffhanger of the Lothal Temple in danger, the secrets within about to be seized by the Empire.

The last half of Season Four is very tightly written, this episode a prime example. It's breathing space for us to grieve, and it still is seamlessly tied to the plot in the episodes prior and after.

The Dume wolf operates, as Ahsoka would suggest later, as an extension of Kanan's will, working Ezra through the blocks in his head one last time, like he did in "Gathering Forces". Ezra wouldn't fully recover until after "The World Between Worlds" but he's on the way to properly grieving, shelving his feelings for the moment in order to do what he has to, what only he can.

And boy am I looking forward to that. :)

[rubykgrant]

(Oh, no... I found some stuff I was writing about younger Dick Simmons, and how his parents treated him... I forgot I wrote this, but it was definitely going to be background information in a bigger story)

WARNING for mentions of child abuse and neglect!

The problem with his father was… no matter how well Dick thought he knew the man, he never could tell when something bad was going to happen.

His mother gave the warnings- “Richard, you’re starting to be a problem. You need to leave the room now, darling…”, and he would shuffle off, dismissed. His father might be smiling, or laughing, making Dick think everything was fine, and then?

He would be shoved. A forceful push with one or both hands, that usually sent the boy flying backwards (perhaps stumbling until he finally fell, or simply colliding with a wall or some furniture). It was abrupt, perhaps even more shocking than genuinely painful… no, when his father wanted to physically hurt him as much as possible, it was different.

When he was in trouble (for what, it didn’t matter), his father would sit him down somewhere, talk to him about why he was disappointed, and squeeze Dick’s shoulder. Harder and harder, until the pain was so great, it made the boy cry out. At one point, Dick tried to simply whimper sooner, hoping that it was the fact that he was admitting anguish that caused his father to relent… but his dad wasn’t to be tricked. If the larger, stronger, grown-man thought his child was “being a baby” about the punishment, he would ignore the cries until he decided enough time had passed. Dick would also try another approach, hopelessly keeping quiet as long as possible, in an attempt to prove he could be strong. This also didn’t work.

The point of this punishment simply seemed to be that it NEEDED to happen, it was just the result of being a failure. It also wasn’t the only nasty trick his father pulled; besides the shoving and painful pressure on his shoulders, Dick’s father would also sometimes just… break things. Not in a fit of rage or a sudden out-burst; it was always done calmly and planned-out. He waited until Dick was home from school, or done with his chores. He was already in his son's room, and would ask- "Do you know why you're in trouble?".

A "yes" or "no" didn't usually matter. He would start to destroy things in front of Dick.

Models and figurines that had been collected and put together, posters carefully arranged on the walls, various toys and video games, books and magazines… they would be broken, ripped apart, or smashed. The worst part of this was, Dick was forced to clean it all up after (either throwing it away after, or saving what he could to hopefully try and fix).

Sometimes, after Dick had lost a math in a sport he didn't want to play, his father would march him over the the mirror in the hallway, stand behind him, and remind Dick why the failure was just going to keep happening unless the boy finally stepped-up and CHANGED.

Then he would shove his son's face into the mirror, and walk away. Usually still smiling.

His mother’s method of punishment was to ignore him. If he didn’t leave when she asked him to, she would get up herself, go to some other room, and lock the door behind her.

She once ignored him for nine days in a row, because he kept on asking if she was still mad… he wasn’t supposed to do that. He was supposed to be quiet and behave until she decided to speak to him again. When he was little, she would make sure to still bring him food to eat and get him to bed or off to school, but with no direct conversation. Once he was about twelve years old, he had to fend for himself.

On the very rare occasions he did something RIGHT, his father would also squeeze his shoulder… but not painfully. His mother would praise him and brag about him to other people. In the moments of awful quiet or humiliating torment, he couldn’t help but think about his parents when they were actually happy with him. He wanted, DESPERATELY, to make them happy as much as possible. He just… wasn’t very good at it.

[wizardryplanet]

okay hi!!!

(im asking from main btw! polyamorous el here!)

so, idk if u saw tags under your posts but im absoultely invented in your stranger things spiderverse au AND SO HERE COMES THE QUESTION

i love dustins backstory, but u didn't tell anything about his relationship with el so im curious how it works for him! bc we already know that mike will try to stand far from will bc we doesnt want to lose him but it will be too hard for both of them, but what about dustin? will he catch some feelings for el? and if he'll do, will he try to not pursue any romantic relationship with her bc he would be scared that what happened to suzie will happen to El as well?

asdfg

sorry kinda excited about it. anyway, love your little comic <3

OMFG HIIII SOMEONE WHO IS AS OBSESSED WITH HENDERHOP AS ME??? A DREAM COME TRUE 🥰

Also I completely forgot to add Henderhop to their backstories so my bad! ^^’ I do want to expand their backstories with more comics in the future! But for now I’ll just ramble here 😛

In Dustin’s universe, he’s really good friends with Will and El, he knows Mike through Eddie, and seeing his good friend as another Spider-Man is endearing to him so he visits Mike in his universe a lot to get away from most things-

However in his universe he and El are good friends but never get the chance to talk considering she is still with Mike, at first- he was never interested in relationships after everything that happened with Suzie, it was too hard to bare at the time. He was out of it for the most part- he drifted away from Mike, El, Will and all of his friends. However when he went into the Spiderverse with Mike and met this El- they sort of began to bond. Mike and Will had their own problems trying to avoid each other, but realized that avoiding the problem won’t fix anything, they try to make amends as best they can together. With Lucas and Max trying to fix things as well they are sort of stuck in the middle and decided to support each other, Dustin began to open up to El because she was the only one who was there to listen and genuinely understand. She told him what she went through too, they finally found someone on equal footing with each other.

It began to shift into a more complex friendship, he would visit her universe just to talk, and she would do the same.

They both agreed to keep their relationship strictly as friends, until Dustin would be up at night thinking about her, his feelings became mixed and it troubled him, he confronted El saying how scared he was to loose her as well.

He could never imagine the world without her in it and it scared him. “The world needs Spider woman. But what happens when I need her more?”

She felt his anguish, but from what they’ve seen from Will and Mike, trying to avoid anything and each other doesn’t solve anything, it hurts more to stop.

“Then why stop?”

She told him that Spider man or no, they are people too, sure they aren’t normal but who cares? They have each others backs and understand each other more than anyone else in the world. Maybe that’s worth more than something?

Yes they do get together! And they stay together! They have minor bumps in the road in their relationship but they communicate and pull through it together, they understand everyone around them more than they know, what they see around them makes their relationship stronger, and they teach each other a lot of things, El’s relationship with Hopper gets stronger because Dustin tells her to keep the people she loves the most close to her. And in return, she tells him to open up to his close ones, allowing him to build up the courage to talk to Steve.

They are just such a cute ship and I think they would be the most healthy relationship but that’s my opinion lolll

Also they would do the iconic upside down Spiderman kiss except Dustin would jump back onto the ground so they can do the kiss <3

And they hold hands the most out of everyone, the first time they talked they held hands as sort of support and understanding of each other, it became their connection to hold each other tight and never let go. :)

Hope that answers your question!! Sorry it’s long but I love to talk about their stories aaaaaaa I will make more art of them and of the others as well because I love them too much- thanks for the question :D

[helldustedstories]

His mind is still racing; he'd said the wrong thing, he'd hurt Blitz again, he was so stupid, why hadn't he been paying more attention to the way he was reacting instead of focusing on his stupid script-- He can feel himself spiraling in real time, and forces himself to take a deep breath; this wasn't helpful for either of them. Stolas has said the wrong thing, and he's going to fix it, going to reassure Blitz that he is more than enough, simply by being here.

Because if he wasn't, Stolas knows that he would have been going through his recovery on his own, and he can't imagine how excruciating and lonely that would have been. Thank Satan they'd talked, that Blitz had come after Stolas himself…., or they probably wouldn't be where they are right now.

Stolas is still on his knees in front of Blitz, ignoring his body's protests, leaving them at eye level, on equal footing, the way they should have been from the beginning, the way they're going to be from now on. They were equal partners in this relationship, and they were going to be figuring things out together. So why had he thought that springing this on Blitz was a good idea?

The hand he has in his is shaking, and Stolas keeps hold of him, keeping that point of contact between them, trying to show Blitz as well as telling him that he really isn't going anywhere. He can still hear the way Blitz's heart is racing, and he just wants to wrap him in his arms, to apologize for surprising him with this, for making him think he'd done something wrong, that he needed to do better.

Later, Stolas will go over their conversation again, will try to pinpoint the first moment Blitz had started to worry, and he will do everything in his power to make sure he never makes the same mistake. Because anything he'd said to put that anguished look on Blitz's face was something he wanted to avoid; he didn't ever want to see hurt like that on his face, not if he could help it.

He was glad the crystal had fit the way it was supposed to, glad that when Ozzie had contacted him to say that he could have a crystal to give to Blitz after all, that he just needed some specifics, Stolas had had the precise measurements on hand. This way, Blitz wouldn't have to worry about losing it, would always be able to have it with him, would always be able to use it to make his way home.

❝ - How long have you been thinking about this? ❞ Blitz asks, and it's a reasonable question. Stolas had said he'd been thinking about it for a while, had been planning to give Blitz the crystal, but hadn't said much beyond that.

"Since that night at Ozzie's," he answers, and it's the truth. "As painful as that night was for both of us…, it showed me how much of a pompous fool I had been." There wasn't another explanation for it; he'd been leaning into what he knew, both from his limited upbringing, and the books he'd devoured over the years. "There's….a lot I still don't know, and I was treating you more like the hero in one of my books than an actual person," Stolas murmurs, remorse clear in his red eyes. "I'm so sorry, darling."

Just because he hadn't known any better didn't excuse the way he'd treated Blitz, and he'd been trying to do better since then, had done what he could to respect his boundaries, had only used his name, the way he'd wanted from the beginning.

When Blitz steps closer, Stolas' eyes don't leave his, not even when he feels him put his other hand on top of his, linking them more, creating another point of contact between them. And as Blitz speaks, it's Stolas' turn to listen, to take in what he's saying, and to offer one more explanation of his own.

He offers him a small, sad smile, reminded of the other big reason he'd wanted to make sure Blitz could keep running his business without his book.

"I know you didn't," he says, his voice soft, "but I did. I needed to know that, if anything ever happens to me, you'll be okay." Between Stella showing up and the fact that Striker was still out there, Stolas was under no illusions that he was safe, by any means. And his first instinct was to take care of the people he loves, which in this case, meant making sure that no one would be able to take away Blitz's ability to provide for himself and his family.

❝ Were you scared too? ❞ the question catches Stolas momentarily off-guard, even as he's leaning into the hand on his face, relishing in the soft touch. It's comforting, reassuring, and he lifts one of his own hands to cover Blitz's, to keep him close.

But when Blitz mentions that he liked being needed, that it was safer than simply choosing to be around one another, he turns to press a kiss to that hand, looking up to meet Blitz's eyes once more.

"Yes," he starts. Stolas takes a moment to blow out his breath before continuing, "yes, I'm scared, too. But I'm always going to need you, Blitz. You're….as much a part of me as my own heart." He says it simply, matter-of-factly….because it's the truth. He needs Blitz in his life; the idea of being without him isn't something he wants to entertain, even for a moment.

He's still watching Blitz, taking in his every movement, but he's still surprised when he feels Blitz's thumb tracing under his eye, and he realizes he probably looks exhausted, after the day he's had.

But there's a smile on his face as Blitz reaffirms that his choice hasn't changed, that he's still all in, and it turns a bit sheepish when Blitz finishes by asking him to just talk to him next time.

Stolas nods, giving the hand he still holds a soft squeeze. "I'm so sorry, darling; I got too into my own head, between Stella showing up and forgetting to pick up my refill…., I should have waited until I was in a better place, should have talked to you about it first instead of just……springing this on you, making you think the worst."

He pauses for a moment, then adds, his voice soft, emotions carefully controlled, "I just….I didn't ever want to do to you what Stella did to me." Stolas wants Blitz to always have the means to step away from him, if that ever becomes something he needs. He will choose Blitz, every day, but he will never do anything that traps him, forces him to be with him. That was the whole point of giving him the crystal instead.

"No life-altering decisions without talking to you first," he promises with a soft smile. "We'll decide our future together." Because now they could actually have one. It was new, and it was terrifying…., but it was also all he'd ever wanted, Blitz was all he'd ever wanted.

There's a moment of silence between them that seems to last for at least a year. Blitz feels - trapped. Not by Stolas; even in his panic, Blitz holds too much care in his heart, too much trust by now, to feel trapped by him. It's as if some scene from eons ago is superimposed over what's happening now, and he can't sort through what he's meant to be feeling - where the feelings are coming from in the first place.

The voice in the back of his mind has only a single instinct: he can't face another closed door. He can't lose someone again.

As is customary when the panic hits - and Blitz can recognize it, now, for what it is - he tastes ash in his mouth and has to swallow against it. His eyes instinctively track Stolas' movements, his expressions, as he takes Blitz's hand and kneels down. An automatic noise of protest sounds in the back of Blitz's throat - don't hurt your leg ! - but it gets lost in the smoke inhalation and by the time he'd be able to work past it, Stolas has his full attention.

You didn't do anything wrong. I'm not leaving you.

Blitz hadn't realized that his hands were shaking until Stolas has one in his grasp, and there is something solid to ground against. The other is still against himself, now closer to pressing against his chest instead of the hollow of his throat. His forefinger idly brushes against the skull on the choker, gentle and tender in its motion.

He - he's supposed to know better than this by now. Blitz has been trying to make real changes in his life - apologizing when he needs to, taking down his walls when he can. Communicating. But that oil-slick, dripping tar monster in the back of his mind is loud as fuck, scoffing and reeling against the idea of being enough - of having always been enough.

Stolas doesn't lie. He doesn't lie to him. Blitz has chosen time and again, particularly since everything that transpired at the hospital, to believe him. So why can't he now?

He's doing his best to shut his fucking mouth and actually listen - actually pay attention and stop lashing out like a brat. But despite Stolas' reassurances, he still flinches at the idea of not relying on him. What - what the fuck is wrong with him? Stolas is gentle and kind - he's holding onto him, explaining himself, so why is there something in Blitz's chest that's screaming ?

His brow furrows at the mention of choice - the freedom of choice. Blitz is here - he's here. Despite the fact that he's still half convinced he's going to be untold tragedy into Stolas' life, despite knowing that he's hardly worthy of this kind of relationship, Blitz is here. He made that choice in the hospital, when he was forced to grapple with the idea of his life without Stolas in it and simply couldn't allow it.

He watches with careful eyes as Stolas fits the crystal into his bracer, as if it were made perfectly for its size. - It probably was. Stolas doesn't do anything by halves - he'd probably made sure this was made to specific dimensions, the perfect size for an assassin who can't be weighed down by things.

❝ - How long have you been thinking about this? ❞

Blitz barely recognizes his own voice when he hears it - lower than he remembers, uncluttered by braces. The question is thin and hesitant, and he doesn't know why it's sitting so - so wrong in his chest. This is clearly important to Stolas - he's allowed to make the decision to swap out his grimoire for the crystal. It is his, after all.

Why does Blitz still feel so caught off guard.

Finally, he drags his gaze back up to Stolas' face. He doesn't know what to make of the crystal, feels self-conscious about the sensation of it on his wrist, but, as always, the sight of Stolas' face is something he has no trouble connecting to - grounding with, seeking safety in.

Blitz steps closer, closing the distance between them, placing his other hand on top of Stolas', sinking into the warmth the contact creates.

❝ I ... I already chose us. I didn't need ... ❞ He sighs a little, eyelids dropping to half mast. Objectively, this is good. Stolas is right about strings - Blitz knows much better than to mistake business - sex work or otherwise - for feelings. He knows that the book is a holdover of a deal they haven't relied on in months, now - but it's still there.

Now - now there really is no tangible reason for Stolas to keep him around, except for his choice to.

Does that - terrify Stolas as much as it terrifies him ?

❝ Were you scared too? ❞ Blitz lets go with only one hand so that he can cradle Stolas' cheek, taking in, for the first time, the fogginess and hurt and worry and exhaustion in his expression, and his heart twists like it's been skewered. ❝ I - liked ... being needed. It's - safer. More reliable than - y'know. Just because we want to. If you have a reason to need me around - ❞

He runs a thumb so gently under Stolas' eye, tracing the soft bag that's formed there, and he tries for a smile.

❝ - Apparently, I'm just shit with surprises. My choice hasn't changed, Pretty Bird. I'm all in. I just - ❞ It feels so unbelievably selfish to ask for anything, when Stolas has gone out of his way to do this - has been hurting over this. ❝ Can you ... talk to me next time? ❞

[unabashednightmarepizza]

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙤𝙤𝙣 𝘾𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙎𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙒𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙄𝙩'𝙨 𝙎𝙪𝙣

A/N: Okay so I don't care if you guys will judge me but damn I had fallen for this Mister Bird Man and I thought like " Why the heck I won't write for this fine specimen?" So enjoy darlings, because that's gonna be a wild ride and there is probably gonna be another part! And a friendly reminder, when the italics start, please listen to "Only Love can hurt like this"...

Summary: After being alive for 20.000 years alonsgide your brothers, losing one, losing your parents,your home and Thanos snapping everyone, you were ready to take a break from everything. While having a different identity and a somehow normal life, you couldn't have guessed that a shy, Egyptian nerd would come to ask for your help which eventually led you to meet with someone you thought had betrayed you.

Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Pairings: Khonshu x Goddess!Reader( romantic); Steven Grant x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Marc Spector x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Jack Lockley x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Layla El-Faouly x Goddess!Reader( Platonic)

"Thank you so much for covering for me, Leena! I don't know how I can pay you back..."

"Don't worry, darling! Just bring your daughter over for a play date and everything will be fine!"

You waved at the young mother who you called as your friend and watched her get out of the shop hurriedly. You sighed heavily and sat down to look at the many people passing by with a sad yet content smile. All of these people who didn't know anything about the snap just went on with their daily life and those who were aware of what happened were trying to adjust to life again. You were happy that everybody was safe and sound but remembering how two of your best friends died and the anguish you felt when you couldn't feel the heartbeat of your little brother Loki was...

You shook your head when someone came in and you immediately grabbed your apron to go to the front. You passed by a young girl who was struggling with college and feeling sympathy for her, you touched her forearm slightly to give a relief to her. She looked around curiously to see if there was something wrong around her, not being used to feeling so relaxed after days of stress. You called out her name, making her scared out of the thought that she did something wrong. Smiling reassuringly at her, you made a thumbs up at her.

" Don't stress over college that much! It's not that worth it and please go home early and rest! That's an order!"

She widened her eyes at you and with slight tears, nodded her head to go and change her outfit. A pair of brown eyes were watching your interraction with curiosity and wonder. He wasn't used to seeing such kindness on a complete stranger ever since his childhood. He slightly turned to the ancient God next to him to not catch any attention but just gaped at him since he was feeling... sadness? Love?

Can this sassy old God even love someone?

"Hey, just wondering? How do you know this woman and how can she help us?"

"And why are you being all mushy?"

"Marc Spector, if you talk about her like that one more time, this will be the last time you'll ever talk."

Steven raised a hand in surrender and just pouted, turning to look at you talking sweetly at a child, he couldn't help but think that you were just an ordinary girl who had a simple life as a barista who was kinda cute and motherly who was also great at making coffee.

Elegant look, kindness that could match even Gods, and good looks-

"Don't you dare to think nasty things, little worm!"

"Okay, easy there Murder Bird!"

He scoffed and wanted to throw a snarky comment at him but when they heard you laugh over your phone while holding your chest thightly, Steven jumped up on his seat at Khonshu growling loudly at you- no, to the one you're talking with.

"You know, Buck... I prevented a death today and I'd like to consider this as a character development!"

"Oh, yeah? How did you do it then, doll?"

"Self restraint, of course!"

You were idly fixing the tables while talking to Bucky who became a close friend to you after helping them for some time with the new Captain America. Even after you three parted ways, they were still a part of your daily life since your daughter loved Sam's corny jokes and your son adored how strong Bucky was. They both weren't used to someone so young, little yet strong kids look up to them, especially Bucky who thought that he wasn't a good man that deserved praise. Before you could scold him for laughing at your answer, you visibly beamed at hearing your son and daughter over the phone, both of them laughing joyfully.

"Is that momma you're talking? We want to talk too!"

"Yes, Uncle Bucky! We want to!"

You sat down and looked at the many pastries before you absent-mindedly while Bucky was trying to set the excited kids down to let them speak to you. He couldn't exactly blame them for their excited fidgetings since it's been a long time they saw you and he wasn't sure if he could keep up with their powers and smartness any longer.

Being born to the two strong Gods wasn't that easy. The spiritualness, smartness, and limitless power the duo held between their little hands were inmeasurable and that made you worry more than anything in the life. Who knew what would happen to them if humans learnt about them? Or your enemies? Would you be able to protect them from the harsh world?

You winced when a particular harsh and angry scream erupted from your daughter. Heart pounding hard in your ribcage, you asked if everything was all right when Bucky told you that she got angry at her brother for pulling on her hair and threw a blue and white ball at him?

"Wait... Did you just say a ball of blue and white?"

"Uhh, yeah, doll... That's exactly what I said but- Hey? Y/N? Are you there?"

"Ah, yes I am! I think I should come there quickly though... I guess her powers are starting to appear and I need to be there to calm her."

Sighing heavily to yourself, you touched the star necklace around your neck to find some solace and comfort midst your anxiety attack. Remembering your one and only love used to bring a painful stab to your heart and an inexplicable feeling of revenge and hatred but now, there was just a hollow emptiness inside where your heart used to be. Your eyes started to sting, your heart paced faster at the memory of you two's last day together.

The late night sky was shining with the bright twinkling light of millions of stars. The purple galaxies across the endless universe and constellations was such a sight to behold that you just admired what your lover created while swinging your feet in the river. Your father, Odin, was pretty much angry at this relationship you two created, stating that you were a princess and therefore deserved the best, strongest God as your husband... and preferably a human one. You giggled at the memory of you yelling at him so hard that your beloved Sun almost scorched the whole Asgard. You could even feel the air shifting around you and hearing what sounded like a coo and awe, you felt your cheeks turn a sweet shade of pink before sprinting out of the Great Hall to visit your lover in his realm.

And now here you were, throwing your head back fondly to look at the endless sky. Seeing your grumpy yet sweet lover, you smiled so wide that it made even the aloof God smile at your small form. It was hard, being with a 8 feet God while you were hardly 5'7 but somehow you managed by finding that he can posses a human body. You didn't like the idea that much since he was using a poor guy who didn't know anything and you loved the true form of him more than anything.

"My Goddess, why are you smiling so hard for?"

You hugged yourself hard when you heard his deep and raspy voice while he was holding his staff between his hands and folding his legs to sit next to you. Looking up at him and kissing his beak softly, you took his long arm between yours and looked at the lake before you which was painted with a deep night blue which was lighted by the little fireflies.

"Nothing, My God... Just thinking about my father and you."

"Hmm... I hope you don't think about pranking him with your brother, my star."

"Ah, never never! Me, the Goddess of Sun, Power and Eternal Life, is going to prank the Father of all Gods? No way!"

A deep chuckle rumbled inside his chest and vibrated to your own smaller figure which made you close your eyes peacefully. Inhaling and exhaling slowly, you made the most with the time you two had before you went back to the palace to work with your mother. Looking at the hollow eye-sockets of your lover, you made an attempt at speaking first. But before you could open your mouth, he beat you into it.

"My Moon, My Star... You do know of how much I love you, right?"

You looked at him with your pointer finger up, mouth forming a shocked "o" shape at the voice of the God of Moon and Vengeance, the one who would throw snarky comments and annoy everyone sounded so... insecure and unsure. The realization made you look at him in sadness and also curiousty, wondering why he brought this up so suddenly.

Turning your head to the big and shining Moon, you looked back at the God that was your lover who was looking down at you, waiting for an answer. You couldn't probably see it that well, but internally, he was at the verge of freaking out. Eveey second you weren't answering was like a year of torment, a million swords piercing his body at everywhere. He knew he was rough around the edges, that you deserved a more romantic lover who wouldn't yell over you when you fluster him, or someone you could cuddle easily, walk around easily... The list was a long one, and unfortunately, Odin threatining the absolute shit out of him if he didn't leave you was good enough as reason to be sentimental.

"Leave my daughter alone, you little God! How can you possibly think that you're good enough for her?!"

He still remembered how your mother tried to calm him down while he was walking back to where he came from, mind already clouded by what he was supposed to talk to you. He wasn't gonna just leave you like that just because Odin told him to. Heck, he felt like he found the other half of his existence! You, with your bubbly personality, caring self, smile full of love and eyes that couldn't even rival the brightness of his Moon were everything to him.

And he would rip out his own heart if it meant that you could be together, even if it was in another galaxy.

"You know... The Moon actually shines thanks to the Sun, and without the Moon, Sun wouldn't have such a meaning to anyone except brightining around while burning itself for the sake of others..."

Khonshu looked at you with what you assumed as wonder and a deep love, your bond being strong with him. You definetly have a way with your words, my little one, he thought while gently caressing your hair. He hummed at you, urging you to go on and you grabbed his hand. Putting something a little heavy in his hand, Khonshu tilted his head to left and opened it, only to see a sun-shaped golden necklace. Looking at you for any affirmation, you just nodded your head and got up to put it on his body, right in the middle of his Moon Symbol.

" You're the reason I don't loose myself, the reason I always give life and enlighten paths for people. I'd like to think that we both complete each other and... I really don't believe my life would have such a meaning if you weren't in... there..."

You blushed and shied away from him, taking a few steps back when you felt him freeze and get tense. You beat yourself in your mind for speaking so carelessly and pouring your heart out at him. You two weren't even in that part of your relationship! You didn't even mutter any "I love you"s to each other, and you had to go and utter such words! Idiot YN!

" Why?"

He didn't know why exactly he said that, I mean you literally serenaded to him and he asked "why?". But he really wondered the reason. You were such a powerful God, beauty that could rival Helen of Troy, or Aphrodite and Hathor and every Goddess all around the realm yet, you chose to be with him. You chose to love him, cherish him 'till the day you'd die and felt so strongly about him that you even created your very own hidden heaven just for you two to come and love each other.

Knitting your eyebrows, you smiled sweetly and kissed his forehead. Lingering there a few second, you took a step back and put his hand on your chest, right where your heart was.

"Because I'm in love with you."

And just like that, he pulled you to his lap and smelled your every part, he always thought that even though there was a heart, nothing could make it beat so loudly. Not protecting humans, not ripping hearts, not Hathor's music, nothing.

Except you...

"My Moon, be mine. Let me make you mine and cherish you forever in the presence of our love for each other."

Feeling every inch of love he had for you through his lovesick voice, you nodded at him with slight tears. Bandaged hands started to caress your body and took you in his arms to go where your palace was residing. You couldn't help but caress the skull and whisper to him.

"Silly, Don't you know I've always been yours..?"

And the Moon shone so bright that it was visible even in the morning and the Sun was shining in such a warm yet strong way that people were curious yet happy since their days will go with peace. You two made your bond stronger by making love to each other for the first time, both in his true form and in a human, laughed freely and happily, not caring about how you'll be in trouble for all the bruises he gave to you but you were fine. You had your lover here, with you, soon to be married for eternal life... Turning to look at him, you softly kissed his jaw and closed your eyes for the sleep to take you over...

Not knowing that the Sun you adored so much would loose its spark in a matter of seconds, and the heart that was once filled with love would be nothing but a heart that screamed for one thing:

Revenge.

*****

"Lee! There is a creepy looking guy and a sweet girl looking straight at you for the past 30 minutes! Shall we call the police!?"

When a co-worker whisper yelled at you, you almost fell of the chair, if not for grabbing the table at the last minute. You looked at her with wide eyes, almost hearing what seemed like an amused chuckle and she got panicked, stuttering over her words while trying to apologize but you cut her off to understand who she was talking about and where that damn chuckle was coming from.

"What man and woman? Where? Show me, show me!"

"Right behind you but don't be too... Obvious..."

She sighed annoyed when you turned abruptly to look at what she was talking about, and you saw a curly-haired woman who had a sweet yet awkward smile and a man looking at you as if you were his next prey with soft curls that fell on his forehead. By the look of his eyes, you could guess that he was somehow in a lot of wars or jobs that included killing, not serial killer since he wouldn't come with a girl to observe his victim, maybe a mercinary or something like that.

Keeping the eye contact, you turned on where you were sitting and looked at them with whole of your body turned to them, legs dangling both sides of the chair. Leaning down a little bit more, you tilted your head to see if any of them would stop looking, whether it was out of discomfort or their human eyes finally loosing the batte against being dry for so long.

"Are we going to keep staring at each other until your eyes will dry so hard that not even water would help, or are you going to stop?"

And you smirked in victory when both of them groaned out in discomfort, rubbing their eyes to ease the pain. You chuckled and grabbed your eye drop for dry eyes, whistling at them, you threw it at the girl while fixing your clothes.

"You know, staring at people is rude and you even kept looking at me when I clearly warned you? You got some real guts, darlings!"

You stood in front of them, folding your arms in front of your chest, waiting for them to finish dropping the eye drop. You turned your head to the back slightly and smiled at your co-workers to let them know that everything was fine and that you were going to deal with the duo. Taking off your notebook and pencil, you waited for them to talk so you can just go and prepare their orders and go back to your place to your kids.

"Okay, gentleman, my lady, what may I bring you?"

"Look, we aren't here for-"

"An Iced-Latte and Americano would be great! Right, Marc?"

You looked at them with a bored yet curious gaze and raising your brow at the look the woman was giving him, thight lips with half wide eyes that screamed for him to shut up, you shrugged your shoulders and wrote their orders. Smiling at their way, you went back to your place and started to prepare what they wanted while trying not to laugh at their banter.

"Look, I know you want to ease into the talk but we don't really have time! Harrow is right on our tail and-"

"And freaking her out would be no help, Marc! If she really is who she is, than she already knows everything just let us get her trust!"

Oh My, What could two mortals do with a God?, you thought, while twisting your rings anxiously. You could just march up right there, tell them to go away since they'd be throwing themselves into more danger by being with you but your mind couldn't help but wonder: Who was this Harrow and how do they know who you are?

Meanwhile, a certain ancient God was right behind you, with his staff planted on the marble floor firmly. He extended a bandaged hand out to you, wanting to touch the face he dreamed of seeing again for all these centuries but he looked at you in shock since his hand just... slipped through you. He shuffled where he was standing and clutched the sun shaped necklace on his chest thightly, as if he was in pain. He didn't understand, do you not see him? Was he wrong about this woman being you? Did you forget about him?

Marc, thinking that Khonshu was right behind him, turned to question the God but when he saw that there was no one, he frantically looked around, finding him right next to you, trying to touch you and fail miserably. He nudged Layla and they both looked at him curiously while Layla was sad. She frowned at the scene since the snarky, grumpy God looked like a little kid trying to grab his mother and that he was somehow looking at her with pure sadness and a sullen look. Layla turned to Marc and leaned down to his ear to speak what was in her mind.

"Do you think... Maybe they have a shared past? It's not normal for him to be so... depressed."

"I don't know but I guess we're about to find out..."

You shivered slightly and looked around to see if there was any open windows than necessary and upon finding none, you grabbed their drinks and walked towards them. Smiling to yourself at the delighted look on the woman's face which made you smile softly at her even more and before you could go and change your outfit, she called out to you.

"U-Uh, Miss! Can we talk a little bit!"

"Uh... Sure, just let me change quickly okay?"

When you came from the back room and sat down in front of them, you could see that the man next to her was no longer the one you saw earlier. Sure, the body was the same but the look he was giving were shy? Anxious, and a little bir excited?

"Sorry for asking this but... Are you Egyptian?"

"Uh, yeah! I am and my friend here is-"

"You sure?"

They both looked at you with their mouths hanging open widely, the man spilling his coffee almost over himself and you gighled delightfuly at their shocked faces while handing a napkin to the poor man who thanked you stuttering.

"Ahh, that's the best part of the day! But seriously, your pheromone levels are quite high to be just friends and I'm not dumb... Actually I didn't mean the sexual tension you both have, more like you used a singular word whereas there are 3 people in one body..."

"Holy Fuck, she really is a Goddess!"

"Shhh, you idiot! Don't shout thing like that!"

You closed his mouth with your hand and looked around you anxiously to see if there was anyone who heard you. You sighed in relief since most people were outside and sat back down on your seat. Looking at them with hooded eyes and a tired look, you lifted your head to look at the woman before you.

"Look, sweetheart... I don't know who do you think I am or how much you know about me but I'm not the one to help you..."

"Wait, please! We know you faced many shit but you have to listen to us, you're the only one that could help us and if you don't want to help, then we'll let you go!"

Layla would have pressured you into listening to them more, even using harsh words but the look on your eyes touched her heart deeply. The tired eyes,dull look that screamed to let go of you... They were the same eyes she used to have and even though she didn't have a great sense of feeling people's emotions, she was sure as hell that you have been through a lot.

Thinking about her offer for a minute, you looked at the door and to them, trying to decide which option was better. To be honest, walking through that door and never looking back was a good idea. You didn't even know these people, you owed nothing to them to accept their offer and you weren't in the mood to deal with a bunch of kids... But the desperation and scared look in their eyes, even though they tried to hide it, was clear and that made you sit straight on your seat. Whining and pinching the bridge of your nose, you nodded and accepted to talk.

The woman, who later told you her name was Layla, smiled in gratitude and looked at the man beside her, who was Steven who had three alters, to speak since things were about to get complicated.

"Okay so, even I don't really understand what really is going on but one time I woke up in the middle of a meadow, got chased down by people and was holding a dung beetle. Later, I saw a man who was talking about the other world, the after life and then used a cane and then sucked the life out of a woman, saying that maybe bad thing will happen in the future and then everyone screamed-"

"All Hail Ammit, right?"

"Yes! But how did you..?"

"Ammit is the ancient Egyptian God that devoured the soul of those who she deemed unworthy. Eater of Hearts, Devourer of the Dead... Please, continue with your story, Steven Grant."

" And I don't know they were after the dung beetle and when I opened it, it just started to fly around, there is a God that wants me to be his avatar, well actually Marc is his but since he's inside my body, I kinda am his avatar too... And how do you know my surname, I didn't even tell you!?"

You sighed lovingly at the man who forgot that you were a Goddes yourself and waited for him to realize his mistake and when he did, he blushed so hard that he just wanted to crawl under the blankets and hide there forever. You pat his hand softly, telling him that it was okay and asked him to show you the beetle. Inspecting it while turning it upside down, you started to murmur to yourself.

" The ancient Egyptians identified this with creation, the indisputable strength of masculinity, procreation, wisdom, reincarnation, immortality and renewal... Ammit has been imprisoned for centuries and if there is a man, using her powers to collect souls... and thinking of the meaning of dung beetle... It's obvious that this Harrow man is trying to set her free, Steven..."

You gave it back to him and rubbed your face while thinking. The Egyptian Gods have always been into chaos more than anyone, being like little children and all that. They never gathered around one topic or aim, resulting in more chaos. They didn't even care about humanity anymore, opting to observe them through their avatars and even then, they didn't really give a single fuck about them. Always thinking so highly of themselves, looking down at humans... No wonder you hated their guts.

If this man would set Ammit free... You didn't want to imagine what would happen to the world.

"But... How can we stop them? We don't even know any God except you and you might not even help-"

"Who told you I'm not gonna help? I mean sure I'd have loved to have the retired life but... Unfortunately, if you come face to face with the other Gods, they wouldn't be nice to you... and probably wouldn't listen either. With me in the picture, they'd have no choice but listen."

"And Miss Lee... Since you're gonna help, can we learn your real name and identity please? If that's... okay?"

Looking at her sharply, you looked down and up at her, knowing that you were making them anxious second by second. Grinning joyfully, you nodded your head and popped a lollipop into your mouth, extending your hand out for her to shake.

"Nice to meet you, Layla El-Faouly! I'm the Goddess of Sun, Power snd Immortal Life... Daughter of Odin and Frigga, elder sister of Thor and Loki, a mother of two children and a woman who is this close to loose her shit."

She laughed at your way of introducing and watched you hug Steven to yourself lovingly, patting his head softly and praising him for being smart enough to find you. He curiously looked at your right and you turned your eyes at where he was looking but seeing no one, you ssked him what he was looking at.

"Oh, nothing! It's just... we didn't find you, he showed you to us..."

"He? Who?"

"It's the God of-"

Everyone inside the shop screamed when multiple bullets sounded around. Protecting Layla and Steven, tucking their head under your arms, you looked around to see a man with a cane walking towards you three. Creating a light shield around them, you took tentaive steps to the man looking at you with a fond smile. Feeling uneasy of his presence, you took out your staff and directed it to him. He stopped where the end of your sun staff ended, he bowed in front of you.

"O' the strong Goddess of the West, the one who enlightens paths and give what they desire, I find such pleasure in meeting the daughter of Odin..."

"As much as I like being praised, I really would rather you talk to me standing up, Arthur Harrow."

Smiling at you, he got up and after setting your staff down, he kissed your hand softly which made you raise a brow at his action. Meanwhile, Steven and Marc was having a headache over Khonshu screaming right next to him.

"IF YOU LET HIM TOUCH HER ONE MORE TIME, MARC SPECTOR, STEVEN GRANT, I'LL TEAR DOWN EVERY SINGLE MUSCLE OUT OF YOU!!"

Not being aware of what was happening behind you, Arthur started to talk while looking at you in astonishment.

"I never thought I'd see the day I'd be in front of such power but even someone like me can get lucky from time to time..."

"Cut the bullshit, darling... Enough of the praises, I already know why you're here."

"Then you also know that I've come here to convince you to join-"

"Who do you think you are, convincing me? I am the one that will decide on what I'll do and I'm the only one who will decide whether you're telling truth or not!"

Layla and Steven let out a wow at your voice echoing all around, and your body shining in an angry orange and red, Arthur's men took a few steps back but he only came closer to you with a manic grin. Directing your staff at him again, he didn't care and continued to talk.

"Oh, I can see why such a power is coming from you... Who would have guessed that a Goddess can have revenge inside of her so powerful that it's enough to burn everything?"

"I don't have revenge or anything like that inside me, watch your tongue, boy..."

"Oh, but you do. The fall of your home, your brother and your friends, being betrayed by the one you thought who loved you... So many sins have been committed against you..."

"Shut up..."

"I know the feeling... The same God who spoke such lovely words to you, whispering his love and affections also deceived me as well..."

Well, that caught your attention. Did he even know what he was talking about? Did he really know Khonshu at some point? You looked him up and down to see if he was throwing any lies at you but you saw... none.

With wide eyes, you lowered your guard and looked at him with big, shaky eyes. Seeing that he was getting under your skin, Marc took over an tried to break the shield that surrounded them.

"Do you... really know him? I mean-"

"Khonshu? The ever changing God? Yes, my dear... I know him and how he betrayed me just like how he betrayed you..."

Marc grunted in pain and cursed at you for creating such a strong shield. And the fact that Khonshu was screaming and trashing out didn't help.

"MARC! SAVE HER FROM HIS CLUTCHES!"

"Who is that woman to you anyways?! WHY ARE YOU SO-"

"BECAUSE SHE'S MY WIFE, YOU IDIOT!

"YOUR FUCKING WHAT?!!"

Before Arthur would try and touch you with his filthy hands, you heard the breaking of your shield and it was as if something switched back on. Growling at the man before you, you punched him hard from the balls and threw him away from you. Fighting against the men surrounding you, you turned to look at Steven and Layla to see if they were fine but what you saw made you falter and silently cry...

For the same bandages and Moon shape was on Steven, and your husband standing right in front of you protectively with a pleading and crushed look...

[fluorescentadolescent1]

broken parts

request: @beth123lg : can you write a elliot x reader where he’s in love with her and she doesn’t know it and something happens where reader is accused of doing something she didn’t do and she tries to tell him she didn’t do it but he’s so upset he says stuff to her that she told him in secret and uses it against her. then weeks later the truth comes out that reader was innocent and Elliot does whatever he can to get her to forgive him but she can’t get what he said out of her mind and him just pining over her.

disclaimer: requests are still open, feel welcome to submit yours! ♡

MASTERLIST.

Elliot couldn't feel guilty about falling in love with his best friend, after knowing each other for two years and spending almost every day together, it was inevitable  She was that feeling that allowed him to stay alive, he wanted to be a person who deserves his love, although it will sound cliché and he knew that friends shouldn't long for each other so much, or sleep so close together but elliot kept every memory with her.

Perhaps iif he didn't make the mistakes he made , and if he had not been carried away by the strong emotion known as anger, he might have had a future with her.

And maybe he wouldn't be heartbroken right now.

a week ago, Jules found out that Rue not only lied to her but also went back to drugs was a bad day for everyone. especially for elliot and y/n, who were part of the collateral damage that rue didn't see coming.

There were only three people in that laundry room at the new year's party. Rue, Elliot and y/n. They both promised to keep it a secret that Rue was still using drugs.But somehow Jules found out and Rue was too stoned to control her actions and her words.

" how the hell do you want me to act if my girlfriend wants to break up with me because one of you opened your mouth, and I'm sure it was you" yelled rue at y/n who silently scoffed, elliot on the other hand knew of his innocence but wasn't entirely sure about y/n's because he knew how much she hated the repetitive manner of rue's consummation. "You can scoff, but it's true. Y/n, i don't need you to worry about me, if you want to play mom with elliot that's your thing but don't mess with my relationship with jules"

Y/n couldn't believe what she was hearing, and it bothered her more that elliot didn't defend her.

" RueI couldn't care less about your relationship with Jules, you junkie bitch, so instead of assuming that I talked to Jules, you better get busy trying to fix the relationship that you only hurt." y/n prayed that rue didn't try to get close to her because the urge to hit her increased by the second.

Rue rolled her eyes and looked at elliot to defend her, but elliot just looked to the side clearly not wanting to be part of the argument. " you know what, fuck both of you"

Rue left Elliot's house muttering insults and trying not to fall into a frenzy. While y/n sat next to elliot on the bed, overwhelmed by the situation that rue put her in. And elliot made the first mistake that would lead to his broken heart.

" you know you can be honest with me, did you talk to jules?" elliot regretted asking that, but he knew it was too late and the damage had already been done.

y/n stood up and looked in disbelief at elliot, who couldn't look her in the eye. "It's one thing for Rue to mistrust me, but you Elliot? do you really think i would do something like that?. After knowing each other for so long, I thought there was no need to tell you that I didn't do it."

and y/n felt how her chest closed in anguish, how her eyes began to burn from holding back the tears that wanted to fall on her cheeks, and elliot wanted to hit himself for causing his best friend that bitterness.

" Look, I don't know why I said that, but it was just a question. I don't know why you get so defensive " and that's when the second mistake occurred, that sentence made her sadness turn into anger.

" just a question?. I see, so I'll just ask you one question too, did you tell Jules that Rue relapsed again because you have a crush on Rue? " she knew that the question had malice in it , but what elliot didn't know was that that question was also tainted with y/n's insecurity.

y/n was also going to have her heart broken after this fight, but it was for a different reason than Elliot thought. It was not only the pain of believing that her best friend did not trust her, it was accompanied by something else.

intrusive thoughts, that they reminded her daily that elliot could never fall in love with her, that it was safer that he felt attracted to rue by sharing his drug addiction, she could never match that feeling.

" what the fuck? where do you get that i have a crush on rue?" elliot was beginning to get annoyed, each word that came out of the other's mouth brought them closer to their end.

" don't try to deny it, even jules knows you want to fuck rue, so avoid pretending to be innocent" y/n  knew that wasn't entirely true, but she can't help but say it.

" pretend to be innocent? you have no right to say something like that, you know that cassie is fucking nate and you don't tell maddy, what kind of friend are you hiding something like that?" y/n and elliot knew that there was no turning back, but elliot decided to seal the end of their relationship by saying "you hide the truth from one and tell the truth to another to try to clear your conscience"

Elliot could swear he saw her heart break through her misty eyes. This time she could not hold back her tears, and decided that she had nothing more to say because Elliot already made it clear what kind of person he thought she was.

she ran home, and he didn't follow her or try to stop her.

coming back to the present, y/n was trying to go about her daily life without elliot by her side, going out with the girls to buy clothes and trying to clear her mind.

" y/n it's not the end of the world, elliot's not the only boy in the world plus we're in the prime of our adolescence so bitch let's buy you some clothes and you're going to be a bad bitch again" said maddy dragging her car to go shopping.

But for elliot, from the day of the fight his days were getting slower and sadder.

It had been that Jules found out that Rue was still taking drugs thanks to Ali, a rehab member where rue attended.

" I'm really sorry that rue has done so much damage with this" jules said on one of her visits to elliot, whom she no longer resented since he told her his true feelings towards her former best friend.

" I don't know what to do, I really screwed up and I don't know if she's going to forgive me." elliot looked at his guitar, it didn't even call him to compose something since he could only concentrate on the emptiness in his chest.

" If I were you, I would go apologize and tell her the truth about your feelings. She thinks you like rue so obviously you have to clear that up." jules watched as elliot thought about what he said, deciding if it was for the best.

"and what would happen if she doesn't reciprocate my feelings" Elliot murmured running a hand through his hair.

"Well, it's not like you can ruin your friendship more."  said jules amused, to which elliot rolled his eyes. "sorry, bad joke. Look elliot, if she says she doesn't like you, which I doubt she will, you'll have to accept it and move on, wouldn't you rather have her even as a friend than not have her at all? "

that was two days ago, and elliot knew jules was right so he decided to buy a bouquet of y/n's favorite flowers and went to her house. Elliot knew that at this time her parents were still working, so it meant that she was alone at home. He mustered up her courage and rang the doorbell, a moment later y/n opened the door and his heart began to beat faster.

" What are you doing here?" she asked  looking at the flowers in his hands, and couldn't help but feel the tingling in her chest.

" I came to apologize, they are for you" said elliot offering her the flowers which she did not accept, he crossed his arms and kept looking at him hoping for a better apology. "I know I said things out of place and hurt your feelings, I should never have said things so out of place and I know that you would never betray Rue and that there shouldn't be someone in this town who is as good a person as you. And i know you're having a hard time because of maddy, not knowing what to do"

God, y/n she hated being so weak for elliot, hated him for having her in the palm of his hand and not realizing it.

"and what about rue?" y/n still wasn't accepting the flowers but elliot noticed she wasn't so defensive anymore .

" I don't like rue and I don't want to fuck her, god y/n, I like you since we met but I never wanted to ruin our friendship with unrequited feelings, in the end I ruined our friendship with a misunderstanding." Elliot swore his heart was beating at an abnormal rate.

y/n was speechless, she lost count of the times she dreamed that elliot would confess something like that, but the wound was still open and needed time to heal.

y/n finally accepted the flowers, and smiled, though elliot could feel the sadness not leaving her eyes and braced himself for her to break his heart again. But no matter how many times she broke his heart, when he puts it back together it will still beat for her.

" I like you too Elliot, you have no idea how much control you have over me, but you still can't expect us to go back to the way we were before. I need some time, but I accept your apologies and I also offer mine." y/n stood on tiptoe and kissed elliot's cheek, that kiss promised a future together but in the present they should remain apart.

" I'll wait as long as you need, and I accept your apology. I guess I'll see you at school." Elliot kissed her knuckles and pulled away from her, even as every cell in his body just wanted to be in contact with her body.

"see you later" y/n closed the door of her house, and hugged the flowers as she felt her cheeks get drenched.

This time she didn't know if it was happiness or sadness, but she was sure that every piece of her broken heart belonged to elliot.

[allegra-writes]

HII! I'm really curious if you're still taking requests but if you are can you please do a season 2! billy russo x Krista dumont's sister reader when the reader comes to visit Krista but she met Billy instead, and then after a few hours of talking to each other they slept together (oh dear) Then Krista caught them. If you're able to make it tysm!

I am for this, I can't resist a chance to mess with Krista Dumont. I changed it a little bit, but I hope you'll like it anyway.

"Sanctuary"

Part I

Gif by @benbarnxs

Billy Russo x Reader

NSFW

Warnings: Only mentions of blood for this part but this series will include oral sex, rough sex, semi-feral Billy and canon level physical violence (not towards the Reader)

MY MASTERLIST | BUY ME A COFFEE

The knocking on your front door made you jump from your seat, big cats documentary left on pause as you eyed the blue laminate wearily. It wasn't late enough in the evening to be truly alarming but, in your experience, nothing good ever came of unannounced visits. And you had already had enough of those for the day thanks to your dear sister's anyway. You had half a mind not to answer, pretend there wasn't anybody home, but a part of you was curious too, a part of you wanted to see which one of the few idiotic coworkers who had your address was desperate enough to seek your help. 

Your friends knew better. They had enough sense and forethought not to just drop by, and if an emergency had come up, you would have been summoned to The Slat. 

No, this was either someone who didn't know you or didn't care to respect your carefully crafted boundaries, and you weren't in the mood to deal with either, but as the frantic knocking became banging, you had no choice but to get up to answer. 

"Hello? Who is it??" You called out, careful not to get too close to the door, in case whoever was behind it decided to kick his way in. Being a girl living alone in New York had taught you a thing or two.

"Dr. Dumont?" A man's voice, unfamiliar and anguished replied. You rolled your eyes. Of course, this was your sister's fault. Wasn't everything, always? "Dr. Dumont it's me, Billy… Billy Russo" 

You froze. You knew that name. Probably everyone in the city did, his face had been plastered all over the news all day. 

Armed. Dangerous. Do not attempt to approach, call the police immediately. You had the whole spiel memorized by then.

… So why were you opening the door instead of dialing 911?

As it was, the man you found on the other side of the door looked nothing like the picture painted by the news, not even with all the blood covering him. He didn't look angry or threatening, if anything, he looked a little pathetic, with those big brown eyes shiny with unshed tears, face covered in fresh scars, and visibly shaking Billy Russo looked terrified.

Billy Russo looked broken.

“You-You're not Krista…” He mumbled, visibly taken aback. 

You resisted the urge to scoff.

“Sorry to disappoint” Your tone was softer as you asked with genuine concern, “Is that your blood?”

Billy seemed to hesitate but ultimately shook his head no, eyes fixed to the floor unable to meet yours.

You sighed, stepping aside to make room for him,

“Come in”

It was probably unwise to turn your back to an alleged mass murderer covered in blood, but that was precisely what you did as you led the way to your tiny kitchen, mind running a mile a minute as it tried to play catch up with your heart.

“My sister is not here, but I can call her if that's ok with you?”

He frowned at that as if mystified as to why he wouldn't agree to you using a phone. 

“Yes” He finally decided, “just- just put in on speaker”

You did, so you both listened as it rang and rang until it sent you to voice-mail. Not surprising, since your sister rarely, if ever, picked up your calls. You left a vague message informing her one of her patients was waiting for her at your place and hung up.

"Would you like some tea while we wait?" 

"You know who I am" It wasn't a question, so you didn't answer. 

"Why are you so calm? Why are you helping me?"

The truth was, you didn't know. You could try to rationalize it, tell yourself your boss had shown interest when the news of his escape first broke, but that wasn't your job and you weren't one to go above and beyond strictly what they paid you for. Or tell yourself that, much like your sister, you were a bleeding heart for lost causes, but you had never shared her particular brand of daddy issues. And you didn't want to think you were shallow enough for the reason to be his puppy dog eyes and pretty face, painfully handsome even with those scars. You had no answer satisfactory enough even to you, let alone him.

So, you deflected,

"Would you rather I'd be freaking out and calling the police?" 

He shook his head no, 

"I'm sorry,” Billy conceded, placating, “I should be thanking you for being so kind, for helping me, I just-...  I'm not used to people showing me kindness. Except for your sister, of course,” He quickly added, as if you needed the reminder of why he was there. Or maybe, he was reminding himself. 

You wondered, not for the first time, exactly what kind of bond your sister had with her patients. 

“The world is unkind” You repeated your father’s words, still clear inside your head even after all those years, “it’s why we try not to be”

“Well… I- I appreciate it” The wanted fugitive smiled at you, small and tentative, and it all made sense then: How a man could get away with so much as Billy Russo had supposedly had, how an intelligent, powerful woman, a homeland agent no less, had fallen for it, fallen for him, had let herself be snared by the man in front of you, too busy being mesmerized by his charisma to realize he was compromising her investigation and plotting her downfall. 

And apparently, you were the same. The way your heart skipped a beat told you you were exactly that shallow, your judgment as compromised as Dinah Madani’s investigation, and maybe even your sister’s good sense if she had any, to begin with. 

You were supposed to be smarter than that, to be better than that, you had to if you ever wanted to be more than the Kingpin’s spider, his favorite little spy. You made a point of always allowing yourself to be compassionate, as much as a way to soothe your own conscience as to spite your boss, but you couldn’t afford yourself this. 

Billy Russo could not stay. 

“And please, I don’t want to abuse your hospitality” The man in question was saying, eyes lowering self-consciously, calling your attention back to the moment, “but I would be very grateful if I could wash up before Dr. Dumont gets here… ”

You blinked. Yes, that was exactly what you needed, to get away from this man and his strange influence. Plus, it would give you the perfect opportunity to call your sister again and make it very very clear that if she didn't show up soon to deal with her problem, it would become the police’s. 

“I’m sorry. You are being so nice already, I shouldn’t have pushed-”

“I’ll get the shower ready for you”

Billy was unmistakably confused as you led him through your apartment, ignoring the guest’s bathroom in favor of your more secluded ensuite, but if he noticed the potential trap, he didn't say it. For your part, as soon as you were out of his sight, you shoot your sister a quick Telegram message, threatening with calling the cops just as you had planned. It was obviously a bluff, if the cops entered your building your boss was bound to hear about it, but Krista didn't know that. There was a lot about your life your sister didn't know about, to her you were just her loser little sister she was embarrassed of, a drop out who was lucky to have a temp job at Fisk Industries. You had no intention to set the record straight, let her ride her high horse, you knew the truth. You had plenty of dirt on her stored away, just in case, and you were willing to use some of it if your little bluff didn't work. 

Sibling rivalry had always been very real with you, as serious and consuming as adults as it had been when you guys were little, eclipsing it all until it was the only thing you could see in your tunnel vision. 

Which was probably why it caught you completely unaware when you stepped into your bathroom to give Billy some clean towels only to find him standing there, naked from the waist up, a tower of pale smooth skin and muscle. All strong and beautiful and male, you could physically feel your mouth going dry, your pupils dilating, all the air suckered punched out of your chest. 

He seemed to grow taller under your gaze, his whole demeanor changing as the seconds passed while you were blatantly staring at him. Shoulders twitching and then falling back, spine straightening, Billy took half a step forwards, looming over you so you were forced to crane your neck to look into his eyes, somehow even darker now. The change was so sudden, so complete it made you dizzy, gone was the vulnerable, broken man on the verge of crumbling you opened your door to. In his place, stood a predator, so elegant and deadly as the panthers you liked watching on TV so much. As one corner of his mouth rose in a devious smirk you understood there was no escape. 

Billy Russo was going to eat you alive. 

To be continued...

[just-someone-who-likes-to-write]

reader fem is not worthy of the love of nuada and decides to break up with him, because she is only a mere mortal, a weak being and still a human being, and he is the ONE prince (king in fact with the death of his father) of royalty , but not accepted and confronted by the reason for this decision (you decided the end) (little anguish never hurts) ��

When I say I got inspired by this request that I couldn't keep it simple. Fair warning the full story is around 10K word, But after asking the others they said it was best to do it in 2 parts.

I hope you enjoy it!

Warning: Self hate, Bullying, Angst with happy ending, Grammatical Error.

Word Count: 6,233

Part 2

You still didn't believe how you ended up with Nuada as your boyfriend.

Like many people in the organization you had a big crush on the Elf prince, at first, it was because of his unusual beauty but as time passed with him working alongside Red and the others you saw the many sides of him that he was hiding behind the façade of a grumpy elf. The kind look he has when he is around his sister or the friendly competitive self he shows whenever he trains with Hellboy or the small joy he shows when the Dogs who were brought along on a mission abandoned the original master and hurried to tackle Nuada as if he was a long lost master. However, just you were observing him and falling in love from afar Nuada was doing the same thing towards you, you were in shock the first day he interacted with you wishing to know you more and build a somewhat relationship with you, thinking he only wanted to be friends you welcomed him and started to interact more with him, it wasn't until he saw you talk with a coworker did he step forward and made his intentions clear for you, your coworker had a habit of playful flirting but Nuada mistook it for an honest one and scared the poor guy away.

When a handsome creature like Nuada comes to you, confessing his feelings and asking to be your lover, others would jump with joy and scream "Yes!" as they threw themselves into his arms. You, however, told him that you needed time to think, which made him anxious that he did something wrong or misunderstood your small glances, when in fact you were the one who was not sure if you deserved him. You had bad relationships in your life most of them affected your self-esteem and made you question your self-worth. Thanks to Liz, who encouraged and assured you that Nuada was different than the others, that even though he is a worrier he is still a prince with manners and respect towards others.

And so here you were in a serious 3-year relationship with Nuada, true to Liz's words the prince proved time and time again that he was the perfect boyfriend. Taking care of you when sick or injured, makes sure to gifts you with flowers that held secret meaning behind them like red roses that meant "I love you", or the white camellias that mean "You're adorable", or Coral roses which never failed to make you blush for it was a subtle way of telling you he desired you, which leads to another reason you loved him for and that is asking for your consent. When he is about to act on something that would affect both of you whether it was bedroom-related or otherwise, he'd ask you first if you approve. Truth be told there were be times when the two of you would get into fights, but what is a good relationship without a few ups and downs, it brought you even closer.

Aside from working for the P.B.R.D Nuada also had his responsibility towards his people and so every few weeks he'd be allowed to visit the Bethmoora clan for a few days where he will check on the progress of his people and fix any problems that had shown in his absence. Nuala would usually accompany him which is expected since she is also the princess of the clan, that's why you were surprised when a week before his departure to his clan Nuada came to you with a question.

"Would you accompany me to my Bethmoora?"

"Huh?" You were in the middle of writing a report, so the question surprised you. "You want me to go with you?"

"Yes." With such a passive look as he waited for your answer.

"I…I would gladly go with you, but why so suddenly?" You asked confused. "Is Nuala unable to go with you?"

"Yes, but that isn't the only reason why I wish you to come with me." He said earning a curious look from you as you abandoned your work giving your complete attention. "I want you to see my world, my people, my home, to be part of it as much as I have been part of your own."

Your eyes slightly widened because as he said those words a gentle look crossed his golden eyes as he extended his hand for your to take. You wanted to hold his hand you really did, but you didn't act on it, you even averted your eye from him to stare at your lap instead, which made Nuada's hand drop slightly before slowly taking it away.

"I did not mean to force you into anything, sorry if I was moving too fast." He said before turning to leave but you grasped his hand stopping him.

"You are not!" You said hurriedly making him turn to look at your panicked face, which didn't settle right with him.

Nuada knelt in front of you and cupped your face in his hands to get a better look at you, his golden eyes scanning your features making you avert your eyes in embarrassment feeling as if he was staring right into you.

"Nin mel, What is troubling you?" He asked cautiously not to frighten you, you leaned into his touch, his rough hands bringing you great comfort. You were quiet for a while before finally having the courage to look at him to answer.

"I'm just nervous…" You said. "Meeting your people is a big step for me, I know it was inevitable to happen, but it didn't make me worried less."

Nuada just smiled lightly at your words, his thumps caressed your cheeks slightly, as his eyes softened.

"There is no reason for you to worry, Nin emel." He assured as he kissed your forehead. "for I'm sure my people will love you as much as I love you."

You gave him a weak smile, which he returned before excusing himself to leave so he can make preparations. As he leaves the smile slips from your face, then your turned back facing your work but didn't continue any of it, deciding to just stare at the paper as your mind pondered on what you should do. You loved Nuada, you truly did, but you still couldn't shake the feeling that you don't deserve him, despite his past sins Nuada did prove that deep down he is a great person, that somehow ended up wanting you for a lover, and now asking you to go with him to meet his people, which is a huge step. You did meet Nuala, spend a lot of time with her even before you and Nuada started dating, and when she learned of your relationship she immediately referred to you as a sister before enveloping you in a hug. But now you are going to meet thousands of other elves for the first time, who will have to recognize you, a human, as their Future King's lover and treat you as such.

You could already feel your anxiety rising from those thoughts alone. you shock your head forcing those thoughts away because you needed to take this step for Nuada.

---

You spent your one week of preparation with Nuala who taught you everything you need to know or do around the people, what to say and what to say, which was mostly to leave the talking to Nuada and when confronted to give small and simple answers. Her teachings made you feel uneasy about what to come as if she knows something and is preparing you for it, she did assure you that you'd like the clan, but that still didn't shake the feeling of something being off, other than that you stayed alert.

For some reason, Nuada was still not trusted to leave the organization without some kind of security around him, not to protect him but more of to keep a watch over him, and even though you were with him they still didn't trust Nuada disappearing on them for you could be "persuaded" as manning put it, by Nuada and cover for him or even leave with him. But the prince stayed calm and allowed them to come along with the both of you.

On your way, Nuada was telling you of everything he had prepared for you, fineries like fruits which are rare to humans, special perfumes that are hand made, along with soap and other hygiene that were handmade, dresses and so many more that would fill the room.

"You didn't have to do all that!" You said feeling both flattered and embarrassed by how far he went to attend to your needs, even though you brought your own clothes ad other products. Nuada just shook his head.

"Nin rís, Deserves only the best." He said and he lifted your hand to kiss, but you gave him a curious look.

"Is that a new word?" You asked, and he grinned proudly of your preservation.

"It is." He confirmed not giving any more information so you pressed.

"What does it mean?"

The prince pretended to think about it for a moment before looking back at you.

"It is for me to know and you to find out." He said with a shrug making you glare at him causing him to chuckle slightly.

It was a game between you two, him giving you a nickname in Elvish and you have to find out what it means without going to anyone for help, especially Nuala. First was "Nin mel" which means "My love", when you learned it you didn't help the stupid grin, or when you learned what " Nin emel " means which was "My heart". There were others but he said these two the most. And now he seems he found a new word, that you had to wait until you returned to the organization to properly translate it.

"I forgot to ask." You said earning his attention again, you tried to hide your blush. "It's kind of a weird question, but Is your room going to be close to mine?"

Your question made him grin mischievously, before he leaned in, close enough to whisper into your ear.

"You will be sharing my room, Nin rís." He answered almost heatedly, making you squirm a little in your seat.

You were anxious about meeting his people, but now a bit excited.

---

You were in awe by the warm greeting that waited for you.

Golden petals falling from the sky as you walked through the underground castle gates, clear line in front of you to walk through as the people of Bethmoora cheered and bowed for the return of Nuada. You and the couple of agents that accompanied you followed Nuada as he made his way through, waving his hand a few times and given courteous that followed a smile, which showed how he appreciated the celebration and is happy to be back. Your eyes darted around never focusing on one area as you were so astonished by everything, You met other supernatural creatures, that is true, but most of them you fought and helped kill or imprison, but the only ones whom you actually befriended were only Red and Abe, but you have also Nuala and Nuada who is more than just a friend. You slowed your footsteps so you could get a bit closer to the agents trailing behind you.

"Isn't this place magnificent?" You asked loud enough for only them to hear, eyes still glued to the structure of the world around you. "I'm jealous of you guys being able to come here every month."

"Speak of yourself (Y/n)." Answered one with a low grunt.

"Yeah, I am more than happy to trade my place with you next time." Another agreed.

Their answers threw you off by how hostile they sounded, you thought they were just one of the few who still hate Nuada, which would explain why they were not as enchanted with the clan as you were. Titling your head slightly to look at them as you lightly lectured by how immature they sounded, however, you stopped when you saw them do their best to avert their gaze from the Elves around them as they continued forward. Your brows furrowed in confusion at their action and so you turned to look at the cheering people around you, you thought nothing is wrong they were all happy faces until their eyes landed on you and the agents behind you, their eyes looked at you with pure disgust. You almost tripped on your own footing from shock if you hadn't caught yourself first, But Nuada noticed and stopped momentarily for you so he can wrap an arm around your waist.

"Is something bothering you, Nin mel." He asked in a whisper only for you, which made you realize that you had a troubled look on your face, quickly replacing it with a smile.

"I.. I'm fine…" You assured. "Just nervous is all."

Nuada searched your face for a moment for any lies before nodding to you and encouraging you to move forward this time keeping you beside him, his grip around your waist firm but comforting. You would have enjoyed this moment with him if you didn't catch the glances of those who once looked upon you with disgust, now replaced with great fury.

---

You were sitting on a chair beside the fireplace in Nuada's room, which as he promised was filled with gifts and luxuries items for you to use and enjoy. Your mind, however, was racing over what you saw earlier. It didn't get better when Nuada introduced you as his lover, they welcomed you warmly making you feel at ease but when Nuada was forced away to attend to an urgent matter the smiles turned into a scowl of disdain as they turned on their heel and left you alone in the hall while grumbling something along the lines of "Filthy Humans". You stayed in your colleagues' room with them, before Nuada came looking for you.

"Why are you here?" He asked confused, you were also confused. "I thought you would be waiting for me in my room."

"Well, I-"

"She said she wanted to be with her friends, Your Majesty." A maid interrupted the same maid who turned her back on you and left you alone before your colleagues got you. "I was about to lead her to your chambers as you ordered but she told me that she wished to be with her friends."

You were in shock by her smooth lie, what shocked you, even more, is that Nuada believed her. He leads you himself to his room as he assured you that there is no reason for you to be nervous, assuming that it was the reason why you wanted to be with your colleagues more. You wanted to tell him that you were left alone and got lost before your friends found you, how every time you tried to seek help you were ignored, how your friends were the ones who found you and brought you to their room.

The front door opened and you straightened yourself thinking it was Nuada, but it was only a female elf who looked to be a noble, followed by another 4 elf maids, each one carrying an item. You were surprised by how they just barged into the room without knocking, you stood and stood behind the chair for protection, your actions only made the noble Elf roll her eyes in annoyance.

"King Nuada had instructed us to prepare you for a ball that is happening later this evening." She said in a bored-like fashion, clearly being forced to do so.

You came from behind the chair feeling better than you weren't in danger but the restlessness was still there for you now was stuck in a room with these Elf who hated your guts for simply being a human. They started to settle in setting-up boxes, which were filled with beauty items that seemed old styled, not like the ones you were used to, another box carried a matching set of jewelry that looked like a line of vine flowers, with each flower holding your birthstone, then finally (F/c) Gown that was meant to be worn by royalty. You knew it was Nuada's doing, which made a small smile to show on your face, But that moment was cut short when the noble elf noticed your joy, which annoyed her greatly.

"Set down. so we may try and make you decent enough for the ball." She said as she looked you up and down. "And from what I see it would take a long while."

Her words hurt and made you feel self-conscious, You were already insecure about your appearance, and being told that by beautiful Elf made it worst. It made the old questions return of how did Nuada end up with you and why did he still want you. You made your way to set in front of the mirror so they may start doing whatever they needed to do, You saw her come to stand behind you as she started the items she needed first.

"I… I appreciate you helping to prepare for the party." You managed to say with a smile, hoping that by showing kindness she would be less hostile, but it didn’t.

"You should be." She shot back as her frown deepened. "I am used to working on only those of true beauty and class, but here I am grooming his majesty's pet, if he didn't personally ask for my exceptional work I would never even be this near to you, let alone touch you."

With that you shut your mouth and said nothing not even daring to look at her as she started to brush your hair, hearing her grumbling something in Elvish every time she meets a tangle or unsatisfied with something. You wanted to slap her hand away, to run out of the room and search for Nuada, to throw yourself into his arms as you begged him to take you back home. But you stayed in your place, closed your eyes as you forced yourself to endure it as you imagined yourself in a better place hoping for this moment to be gone fast.

---

Nuada at on his throne as he was overlooking the ball in boredom that he did not allow to show, every few minutes a couple of nobles would step forward to welcome him personally while resighting how much they missed him and are looking forward to the day when he would return permanently. He would just return the respect and give short and simple answers to any question thrown at him, there were those female Elves who flirted with him or a couple who represented their daughter to him with many praises of the beauty and talent she holds, and the advisor near him did not make it any easier to deal with them as he keeps reminding him that he was still unwed and shot consider securing a wife whom he'll return after he had served his crimes.

Nuada ignored them all, not because he wasn't thinking about marriage but because he already had you by his side. He still remembers the reaction of his advisors upon learning of his human lover, some congratulated him with sincerity, others faked it, and there were those who pulled him to the side and tell him of how the family pure bloodline would be ruined since his dear sister already choose a humanoid amphibious man for a mate, they didn't push as much pressure on her as they did him because "She is a Female", which angered Nuada for several reasons. First, they weren't some dumb animals to care about such thing as breeding, second, It was their own choice on who to spend the rest of their life with, and lastly, and most importantly, just because she is a female his sister will not be looked down upon. He saw this enough from rotten humans and to witness it among his own people disgusted him.

He still stood his ground ignoring any advances of changing his mind about his dear (Y/n), Nuada thought as he gently patted the item in his pocket.

The double doors opened and he noticed how the ballroom suddenly grew quieter except for the music that continued playing. He immediately knew that it meant his human guests have arrived, it happened ever since he came back with the human agents with him and invited them to these parties. Nuada looked up to search for one particular human and there you were. The other humans were wearing black suits and were standing in the middle like a true radiant gem, Nuada was already thinking so highly of you but seeing you dress like a true member of Royalty filled him with great delight. The prince stood up, ignoring the shocked glances from his advisors and the nobles, and hurried to your direction, which wasn’t difficult for everyone to step away from his path. It didn’t take long for you to notice him, you looked away timidly as a small blush started showing across your cheeks. You looked adorable.

When Nuada finally stood in front of you he drank up your appearance not able to hold back the smile that crossed his face, feeling as excited as a child, because you were here with him, among his people and in his home. He always dreaded these balls for he was always meant to keep an appearance for his people, but now that you are here he won’t. He offered his hand, causing you to finally meet his golden eyes.

“Would you join me?” He finally asked. You were hesitant for a moment before accepting his hand with a smile and a nod.

Nuada nodded back, holding your hand tight to his, he looked up to the other agents and started welcoming them to the ball and tell them to enjoy themselves and if there was anything they needed to come to him personally. They just nodded and one of them murmured something under his breath but Nuada didn’t notice, too infatuated by you to realize any detail. He hooked his arm with yours before guiding you through the crowd to reach his throne, which had a small seat beside him that he asked for just for you. He noticed how your grip slightly tightened around his forearm, when he glanced to the side he saw you looking down, then around him, and saw how everyone was staring at them. Nuada suppressed the urge to roll his eyes and instead placed his other hand over your trampling one, you still didn’t look at him but your trembling has calmed and your shoulders weren’t as tense.

“Don’t mind them and focus only on me.” He whispered so only you could hear him and he saw how your head gave the smallest nod of understanding.

As you reached his throne he guided you to your seat, not settling in his own throne until he made sure that you were comfortable. When he finally sat down he noticed that most guests were still staring, which annoyed him greatly, and this time he did not bother to hide it.

"This is a party, is it not?"

He said, his voice loud and almost threatening, silently ordering them to mind their own business, which they do hurriedly turning their head back to their conversation partner. Nuada let out an annoyed sigh before turning back to give his attention to you but you were looking around anxiously.

" Nin mel, What's wrong?" He asked worriedly.

"I shouldn't be here." You said still not looking at him deciding to look at your lap.

His brows furrowed at your answer in worry, he reached his hand to yours but you stopped when you flinched away slightly, the act stings him but didn't stop him as he took your hand to his, relieved that you didn't flinch away this time he intertwined your fingers together and leaned so that no one may hear you both.

"What are you saying?" He asked.

You opened your mouth but did not answer, biting your lower lip to forbid anything to come out, and turned your head away from him. When Nuada was about to press the matter he stopped when he noticed that your ear was… gleaming slightly. Curious he reached out to tuck your hair behind your ear, ignoring the small gasp of yours and his eyes widen at what he saw. Your ear was decorated with a tinkering-like earing with a pointy tip, giving your ear shape like an Elf's ear, he would not have been as upset if it wasn't for the clear redness of your ear being forced into it.

"Stay still."

He said before he reached forward, making sure not to hurt you as loosened the iron piece from around your ear, you were tense as he did his work and finally removed the piece Completely, but he wasn't done yet, he gently moved your head to face him as he worked on the other piece, he could feel your eyes on him judging by your rise of tension he looked livid, which was an understatement for how he truly feels. When your ears were finally free he started to gently rub them hoping to relieve some pain from you, which seemed to work. He wanted to you who dared to force you into such a thing, but he already knew his answer.

"I will punish that woman severely." He murmured to himself but you heard him for you quickly took his hands into your hand and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Don’t'!" You said with such a fearful look, which raised his anger.

"Why shouldn't I?" He asked trying to keep his temper at bay.

"Your majesty." An advisor interrupts you both with a look of worry.

"What?" Nuada snaps at him.

The advisor flinches but doesn't say anything, instead, he gestures with his eyes at the crowd that has been keeping a close eye on them and others who weren't there before a bit too close to eavesdrop. Nuada wanted nothing more than to stand up and ordered everybody out before demanding that the noble elf who was in charge of taking care of his beloved be brought to him. However, His (Y/n) already went through enough that she probably would never want to come back, so gritting his teeth Nuada instructed the advisor to tell the orchestra to change the music signaling the start of a new dance, which thankfully happens soon enough. Couples started to gather in the middle and everyone standing by watching, taking the chance of their distraction Nuada, whose hand still holding yours took you away from seeing eyes to a more private room. Closing the door behind him Nuada finally turned to face you, he could see you fidgeting in your place like a child who had been caught doing something wrong. There was silence for a while, neither of you knew how to start this conversation, but after taking one last deep sigh to calm himself, Nuada finally broke it.

"Why did you keep quiet and allowed that woman to treat you like that?" You kept silent, so he continued. "Did you think that I was the one who ordered her to force you like that?"

"Of course not!" You Finally answered. "I know you would never treat me so harshly."

"Then why?" He pressed walking closer to you and fortunately you didn’t move or flinch away as he took your hands into his, brushing his thumb over your palm to comfort you. "Please tell me."

"I…I wanted to…to…" You stutter trying to collect your words.

"To what?" He pressed. "To be treated harshly and demeaned."

You opened your mouth to say something but only small whimpers came out and then tears started to escape your eyes. The anger immediately slipped from his face and replace with worry as you continued to cry, desperately trying to wipe away the tears from your face to no avail. Felling a great bang of guilt for making his love cry, Nuada enveloped you in a hug in hopes of comforting you but it didn't work as you buried your face in his chest and continued to cry. He rubbed your back and whispered sweet words into your ears assuring that he wasn't angry with you, that he loved you greatly.

Unaware that you weren't crying for his outburst but rather the great insecurity you felt after spending time with the noble elf, her comments still echos in your head.

"I don't understand of all the woman in the world he chooses a human for a lover."

"How did you seduce him?... Not with your non-existent beauty, I can assure that."

"You are cowering away? HAH!.. No beauty nor personality."

"I must admit defeat since no matter how much I try you are still ugly, maybe because of those ears of yours, let me fix that."

"No matter how much you try to improve yourself, whether it was from outside and inside, you will never be worthy of our King."

"It is only a matter of time."

---

It has been 3 days since the incident and Nuada have done his best to make it up to you and cheer you up by giving you access to the royal library, he showed you the garden and gave you seeds, which are rare and safe to humans for you to plant and care for, brought you dresses and jewels that you can take back with you home, and never forget the heated nights that were full of passioned love that the memory alone made you blush furiously. The list could go forever. However, even though you appreciated all of his actions and the fun you had together, every new memory or knowledge you earned did little to help you forget the low comments and the stares thrown at you. A knock on the door pulls you out of your train of thoughts, remembering that you were in Nuada's room. When the person knocked again, you had flashbacks to when the female elf just waltz in and destroyed you with her words. You wanted to ignore whoever was on the other side but you couldn't for the act will give Nuada a bad image among his people. So you reluctantly went to open the door, and to your both relief and distress it wasn't the woman but rather one of Nuada's advisors. When he saw you he gave a gentle smile.

"May I come in?" He asked politely.

"N…Nuada isn't here." You said thinking he was here to meet the elf prince, but he only chuckled.

"Thank you for the information but I'm here to meet you." He said in an almost delighted tone which was strange since he always looked serious. "So?... May I?"

Unsure of what you should do and afraid of acting rude you stepped away allowing the advisor enough space for him to walk in as he made his way to the seats near the fireplace, you closed the door and followed. When he reached there he did no set, rather gesturing to a single-seat, silently asking you to set down, you didn't follow keeping your guards up. He noticed that.

"Oh don't worry Miss (Y/n), I am only here to talk about an important matter…" He said his demeanor becoming serious but you didn't move, so he added. "… Concerning His majesty."

Hearing that it's about Nuada you slowly made your way to the seat with a worried look, afraid that something is wrong.

"Is Nuada ok?" You finally asked. He just smiled again.

"The King is in his best healthy no need to worry your pretty little head." He assures.

"Then… why did you want to talk about him?" You asked confused.

The Elf paused for a moment his back is facing you.

"Miss (Y/n)…" He started. "Are you aware that King Nuada is planning to ask your hand in marriage?"

Your eyes were wide open at his question, waiting for him to correct himself, or say that it was a mere joke, but has he turned to look at you his face was stoic, showing no hint of a lie.

"I can tell from your shocked appearance that you had no clue." You didn't answer, he continued. "Well, let me tell you that he was planning to propose to you for a long time, he chooses the late queen's ring, which I had kept sealed away until recently when the King came asking for it. You could imagine the shock and delight we felt when he finally came forward and informed us that he choose a queen to stand by him…"

Your face heated up at the idea of Nuada telling everyone while preparing how to do it. suddenly his odd behavior is starting to make sense. When he has been asked Hellboy of his wedding to Liz, how he has been trying to help with the twins, which was funny, the way he had been holding your hand while gently massaging your fingers.

"He told us that he had been planning to ask for your hand during the ball night." He continued.

Your face suddenly switched into a horrifying realization that you had ruined weeks, maybe even months worth of planning by crying and causing a scene. Marrying Nuada…The thought never crossed your mind, but now you couldn't help but imagine yourself in a white dress as you gazed into his eyes, your husband's eyes. you wanted to let out a small screech of excitement.

"But thank the gods he didn't go through with it."

That sentence shattered your daydreams immediately, you looked at him and saw that he had the same gentle smile but had a sinister meaning behind it.

"It was a sign that the King should not follow through with his plans for it is not meant to be, sure the young king is… infatuated... By you but who isn't driven by senseless emotions when they are young and reckless." You opened your mouth to try and defend yourself, but he didn't give you the chance. "Nuada is our King, he will be carrying not only the name but also the bloodline of his family, now how do you think that would affect him in the future."

"And it is not the matter of the bloodline only but also how you are unfit to rule by his side." He said with a fake pout. "I mean, how would you act when the king is not present for some reason and there was a life and death matter that needed royal attention?"

You were shocked by the sudden and confusing question that you didn't or more couldn't answer for you did know.

"Is the scenario too big for your simple human brain?" He asked sarcastically. "Then let's try this, two nobles are in a conflict one of them is saying that the other killed a member of their family or stole from them without any evidence, what will you do?"

Your breathing started to quicken as you felt your heartbeat against your rib cage.

"Let's say a royal guest of another clan had come to visit, Do you know how to treat them let alone keep them entertained?"

"I…I…" You stutter feeling your head lightly spinning at the pressure that has been thrown at you.

"Are you even enough for our king, Miss (Y/n)?" He asked the last question, which was the one you have been asking yourself for years now.

You wanted to scream, to cry, to run away, to dig a hole and hide in it until this evil man went away, but mostly you felt numb. You sat there staring at your lap repeating the question in your head as images of Nuada flash in your head, him adoring his sister, getting over his grudges, and becoming friends with both Red and Abe, Getting over his hate and protecting over humans during missions, staying up for days to come up with future plans for his people, Being a loving and supporting lover to you for years, which is a first considering all the verbal abuse you received took from pat relationships. Nuada is a great brother, a friend, an alley, a king, and he deserved the best.

Which was not you.

"Say that again." Demanded the advisor.

"No… I'm not good for him…" You answered with such emptiness in your voice. "I'll never be…"

"What a marvelous realization!" He exclaimed as he clasped his hands. "I am overjoyed that you are aware of your position little human."

You did no answer and decided to stay silent, Which the elf did not mind as he walked past you to the doors completely ignoring you.

"Don't forget your place little one."

He said before exiting the room leaving you with your thought as the voices of hate, filled the silence of the room. You stayed like that for what felt like hours with your own thoughts.

Until finally you came to a decision.

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I hope you guys enjoyed this and I am sorry that it was so long and buckle up there is more!