#the actual main inspiration for having Lizzie as Beauty

[darkspellmaster]

Wish is just a normal Disney film just like all the rest.

Wish is actually a damn good movie, there I said it!

I'm going to start by saying this much, it's very odd to me that so many people are now screaming for a love story from Disney, when not even five or ten years ago there was shouting from the roof tops about Disney doing TOO MUCH romance. For the longest time it was "I wish Disney wouldn't do pairings" "Ugh another romance, can't the princess not." Etc. Now everyone wants one, even though Romance isn't really as big a Disney trope as people think.

Actually let's go through the animated catalogue and see how frequently the love story is centered as the main conflict and asperation to the character. In this case it's the key thing, not a 'Oh they happen to like each other in the end' situation, it's THE thing, the point of the movie is their romance. Then let's see how many have it as the secondary aspect, and let's see how many have it as not important at all. (And we're talking romantic love, not family love)

Romance (Total number: 15)

Snow White, Lady and the Tramp, The Aristocats, The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Pocahontas, The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Secondary Characters hook up so this is a weird one), Doug's First Movie, Tarzan, Lizzie McGuire the Movie, Enchanted, The Princess and the Frog (Only from Naveen's POV), Tangled (could be seen as secondary too)

Secondary (Total Number: 25)

Fantasia, Bambi, Make Mine Music, Fun and Fancy Free , Melody Time, The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad, Cinderella Sleeping Beauty

One Hundred and One Dalmatians , Robin Hood, The Rescuers , The Fox and the Hound , Who Framed Roger Rabbit, The Rescuers Down under

The Nightmare before Christmas, The Lion King ,Hercules ,Mulan ,Fantasia 2000 , Dinosaur, Atlantis the Lost Empire , Meet the Robinsons , Frankenweenie ,Frozen, , Strange World

Not in it at all (Total Number: 42 -including Wish)

Pinocchio, The Reluctant Dragon, Dumbo, Saludos Amigos, Victory through Air power, Three Caballeros, Alice in Wonderland, Peter Pan

Sword in the Stone, The Jungle Book, The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, The Black Cauldron, The Great Mouse Detective

Oliver and Company, Ducktales the Treasure of the lost lamp, A Goofy Movie, James and the Giant Peach, The Tigger Movie

The Emperor's new Groove, Recess School's out, Return to Neverland, Lilo and Stich, Treasure Planet, The Jungle Book 2

Piglet's big Movie, Brother Bear, Teacher's Pet, Home on the Range, Pooh's Heffalump Movie, Chicken Little, The Wild

Bolt, Winnie the Pooh, Wreck it Ralph, Big Hero 6, Zootopia, Moana, Wreck it Ralph 2, Frozen 2, Raya and the Last Dragon, Encanto, Wish

These are just the animated not live action, and not live action with animation movies. All in all it's more common to see a Disney film with NO romance in it at all then a romantic one.

So why is it that people keep saying, but we're missing the romance, it's because of the fact that most of the time the Parks and other media pair the characters together. Take Peter pan, in the movie, the boy is utterly oblivious to Wendy's affections, to the point of pissing her off enough that she leaves the party that the tribe is hosting. In the parks, and other media (the plays, other movies) the romance is in your face, because people want them to be a couple, but in the movie itself you never see it.

Star, based on the making of book, was supposed to be a younger version of Asha's grandfather, which fits the theming of the movie. However, from what I understand, one of the reasons why they went against is was because it was hitting to close to Genie in the shape shifting. On top of that, the character of Star, seems heavily inspired by the art work of William Joyce, who created Night Light.

This is him and Katherine (Future Mother Goose) who is basically Star in a lot of ways. He lights the night to keep the nightmares away. These two eventually grow up (He remembers He's jack frost) and they end up as a couple.

It would be apping off of that story, and sadly people didn't give the William Joyce movie Meet the Robinsons a chance (don't sleep on that folks please! It is a good story.)

Also straight up give more love to the Guardian's of Childhood, you'll be happy while you read it.

I'm not saying don't ship it, what I am saying is that please don't go saying this was planned when it really wasn't. That was supposed to be her grandfather there.

And I'm not against the art work, I find it very cute and sweet and lover the designs. But I do think that the whole, "WE WERE ROBBED!" thing isn't being at all fair to the creative team behind this story, as again, *points up* they were following the tradition of a story that doesn't have a love interest, which is the vast majority of the stories that they tell.

Wish perfectly falls in line also with Disney's normal length of animated movies.

Wish was 1 hours and 35 minutes

The movie that came out before it clocked in at

Strange World = 1 hours and 42 minutes

Moana = 1 hours and 47 minutes

Frozen = 1 hours and 42 minutes

This Hour long movie thing started really with Atlantis the Lost Empire = 1 hours and 36 minutes

While Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Mulan, Lilo and Stitch all clock in around =1 hour and 30 at most, some are even less than that. Wish's run time is equal to that of Atlantis, or Aladdin, or Treasure planet. So I'm a bit perplexed on the "It's too short" thing. Maybe growing up just before and during the days of Little Mermaid and Aladdin made me like the shorter tales.

Which is another point. With a shorter movie, you never get complete backstory. It's a fairy tale! I mean, look at Little Mermaid. Seriously can you Name any of her sisters from the opening song.

Like seriously, I don't really know a lot of people who can tell me anything about Aquatica, for example. Unless you actually read the books or watched the TV show. And before then we had nothing. Nothing on her mom, nothing on her sisters.

Then there's the town Belle comes from, what do we know about it? Not much, not even who governs the damn thing. Howe about Aladdin before the TV series and King of thieves cleared up everything. We didn't know who his parents were, nor Jasmine's mom. Hell we still don't know anything about Cinderella's father from the animated movie.

Point being, a lot of information, much like Wish, got cut for time. In Snow white we were supposed to be given a longer back story for her father and mother, that was cut due to it being to long, it's in the golden book though. Prince Florian (Yes that is his name) was supposed to have Prince Phillips escape, but it was deemed to hard to animate at the time.

Also there was one that was dancing on the clouds, with STARS, around them that looks very much like you know, our Star.

So basically, he's a nod to what could have been for Snow White all those years ago. Cut for time.

Aladdin had a whole cut song because they chopped his mother out as she was supposed to play a part in the movie and help her son with the Genie.

Zena is her name and she was cut to streamline the film.

Maid Marian in the original Robin Hood was supposed to protect him after his plunge into the water, and protect him from King John while he's threatening her. King Richard appears in the end and scares him into stopping but she's willing to take a dagger to the chest to protect Robin.

This is when Richard meets Robin with Marian telling him all about what happened.

All Disney movies change. Isabel in Encanto was supposed to have a nerdy boyfriend that the family disapproved of.

Hell, Frozen was at one point going to be the Bad guy wins the guy, the hero (Gerta) that we followed all the way to the end rooting for her, was supposed to be a gold digger, and Kai was supposed to say "Nah, I'm gonna stick with the Snow Queen" because she's sad and your a bitch. (Thanks Eisner, I hate it!)

So yeah, there's probably A whole lot of cut content that was supposed to go in, but to streamline it to 95 minutes, you have to cut! At least it's not what happened to the Black Cauldron. No I will never forgive Katzenburg for that travesty!

Disney always used Popular Music over Broadway

Honestly this is the one complaint that I hear that kills me the most about this movie, that the studio went with a pop music team. As if this is not a common thing for Disney movies!

Fun fact, the team behind most of the musical scores up until the 1960s were all composers and musicians that wrote songs for the radio. Or song writers that did radio music. If I listed every single one we'd be here for ages.

The Sherman brothers actually wrote pop tunes for the Teen sweetheart Annette Funicello and several other well known singers and actors of movies.

The first major Broadway group was Ashman and Menken, Followed by Miranda, and the Lopez's. Most, if not all of the biggest Disney songs were written by pop songwriters, whos goal it was to get that song played on the radio.

Hell The Lion King, Tarzan, The Emperors New Groove, and Treasure planet to name a few were all done by Pop musicians. I didn't hear complaining about it back then! What's the difference now? Because the team is not Elton freaking John, or Sting?

All of Oliver and Company was pop songs. Several movies didn't have songs, or only had one.

If we're going to celebrate a studio that helped bring an artform out of it's infancy and show that you could do a full movie of animated pictures where you get emotions out of it, we need to celebrate all aspects, and that includes things we may not realize are kind of unique.

When Hercules and Hunchback came out, people complained about them not being "Traditional" Disney. It was Gospel, it was too dark, or in the case of Tarzan, why are we following a boy, or Treasure planet, "Yuck a space story". Now people adore these movies. People who grew up with them want to celebrate them, and sometimes they don't realize that they were once derided as hard or harder than Wish is being right now.

I just wish that people would give these movies a chance rather than not let the creatives tell their story. We had a whole damn section of 2D animation in Strange World! No one talked about it! No one went "More of this please". Give me these stories, let me enjoy a original fairy tale, because if we keep rehashing things, there's going to be little to celebrate when the next 10 or 20 years rolls around.

Sorry for the kinda rant. This has just been on my nerves for a while.

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 3/5

Book Blurb: Set more than one hundred years after the Borden murders, this propulsive, supernatural thriller imagines what might happen if history were to repeat itself today. Perfect for fans of Kara Thomas and Courtney Summers!

When Mariella Morse accuses her boyfriend, Vik Gomez, of murdering her wealthy parents with an axe, the town is quick to believe her. It doesn’t help that Vik is caught standing over her parents’ bodies with blood on his hands, unable to remember anything about the night in question.

But Vik’s sister, Tessa, knows that Vik would never be capable of such a gruesome crime. Haunted by the mistakes she made that led her family to move to Fall River, MA in the first place, she sets out to prove her brother’s innocence.

Tessa’s search for answers will lead her into a sprawling, notoriously cursed forest, where she and Mariella must face a darkness that has lurked within their town since before the days of Lizzie Borden—the original axe murderess of Fall River.

Review:

A paranormal teen slasher inspired by the Lizzie Borden murders! Mariella Morse is a beautiful and wealthy white girl who's parents are murdered with an axe... and the person she's accusing of doing it? Her boyfriend Vik Gomez, a person of color who is poor. It doesn't help that Vik is caught standing over Mariella's parents' bodies covered in blood and with an axe at his feet, however he doesn't have any memories of the night in question. Now it's up to his sister, Tessa to prove that Vik isn't the one responsible and that something else is going on. Tessa's search for the truth will spiral out of control and soon she'll find that the real villain was someone she never saw coming. While the story is suppose to be Lizzie Borden inspired, I was really hoping it would be more female focused and inciting, rather than *spoilers* have the main villain be a boy who not only is a psychopath and is drugging girls but violates and touches the other one without her consent. It just felt really gross and I did not enjoy this take on the book at all. I was expecting something much different than what I actually read. This story is very much a paranormal mystery and if that's what you are looking for then this is perfect for you.

*Thanks Netgalley and Random House Children's, Delacorte Press for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[victorluvsalice]

AU Thursday: Once Upon A Time. . .Beauty and the Skeleton

So -- my pal Thedarkcountess1993, also known as The1920squeen on AO3, is currently doing a "Beauty and the Beast" AU for her OTP (female!Leo and Klaus from Blood Blockade Battlefront for the curious) -- "Tale As Old As Time." Reading that reminded me about Nebbychan's start on a Valice gender-flipped "Beauty and the Beast" AU (to go with her "Cinder-Victor" AU -- with Victor as Beauty and Alice as the Beast (using a combined version of her Hysteria and Ragebox forms)). And, is so often the case with me, that led to me thinking of my own BatB AU for the combined Corpse Bride/American McGee's Alice universe! Except mine isn't Valice, interestingly enough.

It's LizJangles.

Yeah, I was surprised too -- though maybe not that much. LizJangles has become easily my favorite side ship for Valice (and Vemilicia). And you gotta admit, being a skeleton would probably elicit a lot of the same reactions from someone as being a big old beast. :p Although given that Bonejangles in this AU isn't like the Beast in the movies -- well, why don't I just lay out the AU for you?

-->First things first, the main inspiration for this AU is me talking with DC1993 about how, for all her good intentions and desire to teach the Beast a lesson in humility (at least in the Disney variations), the fairy really did something awful to everyone around the Beast (did the servants really deserve to become OBJECTS??) -- and deciding that it would be interesting to do a variation on the story where the fairy is explicitly the bad guy. So! In this version of reality, the castle and its inhabitants are the victims of a cruel Fae, the Dollmaker, who in response to a perceived slight at a party, has cursed everyone to become mobile rotting corpses. Obliged to include an "escape clause" because of how the magic works, he says that if anyone from outside the castle can come to love any of them -- romantically love, that is; they've got to prove it with a true love's kiss -- any of them despite their appearances, he'll lift the curse. Of course, being an evil git of a Fae, he's not going to make it easy for them -- he magically shrouds the castle from the outside world so it can't be mapped, and those who stumble upon it generally end up either fleeing into the night in terror or being tormented and murdered by the Dollmaker. Bonejangles was one of the entertainers at this party, and spends most of his time trying to keep everyone else's spirits up with his songs, even as he starts to wonder if they'll ever see the curse broken.

-->The Liddells in this world live in a village nearby, with Arthur being the local schoolmaster. His eldest daughter, Lizzie, is recently of marriageable age, and as a result is being tormented by the attentions of one Dr. Bumby, the town physician, who is known by most of the town as a great altruist who supports orphans -- and by Lizzie as a self-important git who doesn't understand taking "no" for an answer. She's desperate to get away from him, and maybe even leave the village itself for a life of adventure somewhere else, but she loves her family (particularly her little sister, Alice) too much to just leave them in the lurch.

-->All that changes when Arthur, coming back from a meeting of schoolteachers in the city, gets lost during a storm and stumbles upon the castle. He's greeted kindly by the residents of the castle, and learns their story -- he feels genuinely bad for them, but isn't sure what he personally can do to help, given he's already married. The Dollmaker appears then and says that if that's the case, maybe he'd like to join them in their torment. Arthur and the others plead for clemency, and the Dollmaker, claiming to be in a "playful" mood, says that he'll consider a trade -- one of Arthur's family must stay at the castle in his steed. The Liddells are summoned -- and to Arthur's shock, Lizzie promptly volunteers to stay, seeing it as the perfect opportunity to get away from Bumby. He, Lorina, and Alice reluctantly leave her behind, promising they'll find a way to free her.

-->To Lizzie's surprise, the Dollmaker doesn't afflict her with the same curse as the others, like he threatened to do to Arthur. Instead, he treats her as an honored guest, giving her anything she asks for -- except her freedom, of course. Seems like he has some interest in Lizzie as well, to her frustration. Lizzie does her best to use her status to ease things for the others, and gets to know them. She and Bonejangles end up forming a connection, and it's not long before it's obvious they're starting to fall for each other.

-->Cue a temper tantrum from the Dollmaker, furious she's rejected him "yet again" -- and revealing that "Dr. Bumby" is the guise he uses when he wants to walk among mortals undetected! He locks Lizzie in a cell in a basement and uses his Bumby persona to mount an attack on the castle, intending to destroy the residents and "rescue" her to force her to marry him out of "gratitude." However, the Liddells, knowing the truth about the residents, manage to get to the castle first and help them hold off the invaders, while Lizzie breaks free of her cage. Bumby gets inside and duels Bonejangles -- Lizzie intervenes and ends up badly wounded, though she manages to send Bumby over the side of the highest tower. A horrified Bonejangles shares with her what they think is her dying kiss. . .

-->Oh hey, true love's kiss! Curse broken, and the magical reversal ends up hitting Lizzie too, restoring her to life and health. The double whammy of the curse being broken and his mortal shell being killed forces the Dollmaker to retreat back to his Fae lands, leaving the castle and the village in peace. The villagers, learning what's actually been going on, make peace with the castle residents, and Lizzie and Bonejangles marry.

So yeah -- I think that works as an interesting twist on the most common version of the tale! And it's nice to have another AU idea that puts Lizzie and BJ in the spotlight. Like I said, new favorite side couple. :p

[salvatoreschool]

Kaylee Bryant On "Legacies," The Importance Of Queer Rep On TV, Hosie, And More

"I have so many people constantly telling me that watching Josie on the show has made them feel more comfortable in themselves."

This week, Kaylee Bryant squeezed us into her schedule to talk about their role as Josie Saltzman on Legacies. As a huge Josie fan, I couldn't think of a better way to spend a morning than talking to Kaylee about The Vampire Diaries, Hosie, our favorite books, and more! Here's everything we talked about:

1. What was your audition for Legacies like?

My audition process was very interesting because they kept a lot of it a secret. I had no script and a fake character name. And then I had my second audition, a chemistry read, which Jenny Boyd [Lizzie] wasn't even at. I walked in and immediately just flat-out asked, "This is for the twins, right?" So it was long, but short and intense at the same time.

BuzzFeed: Wait, did you know which twin you were going to be playing?

I initially auditioned for Josie, and then during chemistry reads, they started asking me to read for Lizzie. And then we had our final callback where I finally met Jenny and we both read for both roles. They never told us [who was playing who] until Jenny had her appointment to go dye her hair blonde.

2. What's a typical day on set like?

Gosh, it changes every time. If it's a busy day on set, we're talking like 8 a.m. call time where we spend about two hours on hair and makeup and go straight into rehearsals. If it's a big sort of episode that involves stunt work and wire work, you're talking about doing maybe two scenes in a day. But if it's an average day, we can do anywhere from three to five scenes and we can start at 8 a.m. and wrap at 8 p.m. It really depends. I'm surprised if I'm not surprised.

3. You’ve said you’re a huge fan of The Vampire Diaries. Josie played Elena in the musical episode — what was that like?

It was surreal for sure. They had talked a little bit about doing a musical episode since Season 1. And I always thought that they were joking when they talked about doing Salvatore: The Musical!, so when they said Josie would obviously play Elena, I was like, "Hahaha." And then I got the script and realized I actually was playing Elena. The musical aspect of it was the easy part. The difficult part was, I think, getting into the iconic Elena attire and trying to feel normal. Because we have a lot of crew members that worked on The Vampire Diaries, and they kept coming up to me being like, "This is weird. I feel weird."

4. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve filmed with Courtney Bandeko (Finch) this season?

I really did love the scene that we had in the town square [when] we got on a moped. There were so many fans in the town square that were huddled in the rain — it was pouring rain, freezing cold — trying to snap photos of us. And it was kind of one of those surreal moments where it felt full circle, that I was on a Vampire Diaries spinoff in town square. It was a lot going on, but it was a lot of fun. It's always fun working with Courtney.

5. You and Danielle Rose Russell (Hope) also have amazing chemistry — what’s your favorite scene you’ve filmed together?

Oh gosh, we have a lot that are pretty amazing. Honestly, I'd say [Season 3] Episode 14 — we finally got to do a lot more scenes together. And it's always fun, especially when it's Josie, Lizzie, and Hope, because we have so much history character-wise. Any time you really get to dive into that, we love it.

6. I know Josie and Finch are working through some things right now, but I gotta ask — how do you feel about Hosie?

I love it. Danielle and I loved the idea of Hosie starting from Season 1, and we kept asking and asking and asking for it. So it's kind of funny and full circle that now the fans have kind of taken our side with things, and now they won't stop asking for it. All we want is this beautiful, dynamic relationship. And I think that the fans want that as well.

BuzzFeed: Yeah, I mean, people have even been asking me about Hosie, and I don't work on the show!

Oh, I'm sure! [Laughs] Obviously I love it, though.

7. Is there a particular Josie moment you’re really proud of?

Josie has a scene coming up in Episode 18 — or 19? — I don't know, but it's good. It's sort of the pinnacle of everything that Josie has felt over the past three years kind of culminating into one moment. So, I'm excited for people to see it.

8. You recently came out as queer. How has playing Josie, who’s pansexual, impacted you personally?

I felt a lot of pressure when I initially booked Josie because I was still figuring out who I was and what my label was. And playing a character who was so comfortable in who she was, it was inspiring [to me] in a way that I think a lot of other people watching the show have been inspired. I have so many people constantly telling me that watching Josie on the show has made them feel more comfortable in themselves. It's kind of amazing that we all have the same experience in that having queer representation makes you more comfortable.

9. You’ve been vocal about your Asian identity, and your character has spoken Japanese on the show. Did you have a hand in incorporating that into Josie’s character?

No, not at all! So, I spoke Japanese a few times on the [Instagram] Live and one of our writers, Penny Cox, saw me speaking Japanese and immediately went to Brett [Matthews] and was like, "We need to make this happen somehow." And then all of a sudden, I had a script in my hands. So it was a surprise, but a fun one.

BuzzFeed: Are you fluent in Japanese?

Gosh, no! I'm barely fluent in English. [Laughs] I would say I speak at the level of maybe a second-grader on a good day, though.

10. If you could pitch any storyline for Josie, what would it be?

I always joke that I want an episode that takes place overnight. That way, we all have to be wearing pajamas the entire episode. I just want to wear some comfy clothes for a whole two weeks, that's my main goal. So we can have a pajama episode, that's my pitch.

11. What's it like getting into character for Dark Josie scenes?

It's different in the sense that I know Josie so well. And knowing Josie in turn makes me understand Dark Josie. I have a whole different playlist of music that I listen to for Dark Josie — and I have the wig, which helps a lot with getting into character.

BuzzFeed: Well, now I have to ask what music is on that playlist!

I think "Bury a Friend" by Billie Eilish is a great one for Dark Josie. Also, "Villain" by K/DA is a prime example of a perfect song for Dark Josie, so I listen to that one as well.

12. What's your go-to Starbucks order?

Plain black iced Americano. Aria [Shahghasemi, who plays Landon] says I drink coffee like a sociopath. [Laughs]

13. What TV show are you currently binging?

I just finished watching Alice in Borderland, which is a Japanese show on Netflix. And I know Feel Good Season 2 just came out, so I think that's my next binge.

14. Damon or Stefan?

Stefan! They're both beautiful and I love them very much, but I'm Team Stefan when it comes to Elena.

15. If you could work with anyone from The Vampire Diaries, who would it be?

Ian Somerhalder has a lot of dogs. So, maybe I want to work with him for the sole reason of just talking about dogs. [Writer's note: Kaylee revealed she has two rescue dogs, one whom was sleeping right next to them during the interview! Kaylee described the dogs as "both complete and total nuts," but said she misses them about five minutes after getting into the car to go to work.]

16. Do you think you’re most similar to Josie, Lizzie, or Hope in real life?

I would say I'm an eclectic mix of the three. I can be very headstrong like Hope, very outspoken like Lizzie, and I try to be as loving as Josie, but sometimes that doesn't always work. But I'd like to think all three.

17. Is there a role people would be surprised to learn you auditioned for, but didn't get?

I've been auditioning since I was eight, so there's quite a few Disney Channel shows and movies. And I'm sure people would be surprised because I think I auditioned for like, all of them. It's very funny, one of the first jobs I ever booked in television was Kickin' It with Leo Howard [Ethan]. Talk about full circle — going from being 12 years old and having no idea what I'm doing to being a series regular on [Legacies] and welcoming Leo to the set.

18. Who's your favorite Disney princess?

Oh, I love Mulan so much. She was, like, my first crush ever. I also love Moana, but it's Mulan 1,000%.

19. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

I mean, I do eat rice every day. So maybe just white rice — you can make rice into candy and...yeah, let's go with rice.

20. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could only bring one book, what would it be?

Oh no! I recently read The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers, and I really enjoyed that book. Oh god, Is that the one that I want to bring, though? I mean, I really enjoyed it and it has many different aspects to it. I don't know. Or should I go with Harry Potter? I go through different genres too, like right now I'm in a big sci-fi phase, but other times I'll go the opposite direction and only read biographies. Yeah, that's super hard. I don't think I would know!

21. On that note, what's your Hogwarts house?

Initially, when I was younger, it used to just be straight-up Slytherin. And now, I recently took the Sorting Hat Quiz and I got Ravenclaw. So I'm going to go with Slytherclaw.

BuzzFeed: What's Josie's house?

Josie would be Slytherin. She tries very hard and, you know, not everyone in Slytherin is evil. She just, you know, has her way of going about things.

22. Has anything super funny or embarrassing happened to you on set?

I trip a lot on set. I get scared very easily — if I come around the corner and somebody is walking the other direction, I get scared. Everybody knows to walk slowly around me because I get scared so easily.

23. What's your wildest fan story?

I've had people cry before. And I'm an empath, so if somebody starts crying, I immediately am like, "Please don't cry, because I'm gonna cry." And then it turns into this whole thing. Once we were shooting in the town square and this young girl with her mom started crying, and I just hugged her and I didn't know what to say. So there's a lot of that. There's also the occasional, "Where's your twin?" and...I don't have one, sorry! But yeah, I would say the people who cry always throw me for a loop.

24. How do you unwind after a long day?

I have an hourlong drive home from work, so I usually listen to a lot of music. And by the time I get home, taking off all of my makeup is very therapeutic. Because over time, we're working 13-hour days, 16-hour days, and it's just powder constantly building up on my face. So, washing my face is always very therapeutic. And then just laying back and reading a book and petting my dog is the best.

25. Is there a celebrity you get told you look like a lot?

Most recently, Sara Waisglass [from Ginny & Georgia and Degrassi]. We follow each other on social media now and I completely messed up because I don't know how Twitter works at all. I forgot that there's a DMing interaction, so we followed each other and I was like, "Oh, that's nice." And then just recently, I saw that she had messaged me being like, "We're twins! We should be friends!" And I immediately messaged back, "I'm so sorry, let's be friends!"

26. Who's your biggest celebrity crush?

Oh, I have so many. But consistently since I saw Orphan Black, Tatiana Maslany. Hands down.

27. Finally, have you ever caught someone watching a TV show or movie that you're in on a flight or anywhere else?

We were all, as a cast, flying to — was it New York Comic Con, or San Diego Comic Con? — one of the Comic Cons. And we were all sitting there and we saw that Legacies was actually on the airplane as an option. And we were all just uncomfortably staring at each other. Yeah, that was surreal.

Be sure to catch Kaylee in Legacies, which airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET on The CW!

[shimmershae]

My thoughts on Episode 6--On the Inside

Very appropriate title by the way.  Works in a multitude of ways.  

As always, my randomness is going beneath a cut again to spare the eyeballs of those of you that don’t want to see it at all and also?  Help those of you that have somehow stayed spoiler-free in this brand-new age of early release episodes.  It is still so wild to me that I’m a full episode ahead of half the fandom.  I don’t know what I’m going to do when we get to the final episode and they decide to make us all suffer together--because somehow I do feel they will do exactly that after spoiling us for the first 23 episodes.  It is going to be agonizing.  

Anyway.  Without further ado, Shae’s stream of consciousness review (of sorts).  

Not fair, Angela.  Opening the episode with that shot of that big ass spider.  I hate those suckers.  So naturally, they’re an easy sell for setting the horror scene to me, lol.  

Okay.  Who the hell’s chasing Virgil and Connie?  Walker No-See-Ums?

Barely a minute in and the atmosphere for this episode is moody AF.  

What is this?  Tara Jr. The Walking Dead?  LOL.  Where’s the Scarlett for this mini plantation house?  Anyway.  First three minutes of this episode?  Just as attention grabbing as the first five episode openings this season.  I don’t think people out there are giving our writers enough love for that.  Every episode so far has opened like a mini movie.  

With the way the Walking Dead logo keeps crumbling away with each successive episode, somehow it wouldn’t surprise me at all if the Carol and Daryl spinoff was eventually titled The Living and had flowers growing out of each letter, lol.  I mean, there would be a certain sort of life-affirming symmetry in a show that’s been promised to be much lighter in tone doing just that.  

More Carol and Aaron?  Yes, please.  I don’t necessarily like Carol staying at home and sitting the sidelines like a figurative happy little homemaker in the B story while the rest of the mains are trying like hell to sell the A story, but if she’s going to be totally prohibited from the main storyline until it’s time to blow shit up?  I’m going to continue enjoy getting to see her do what she should have been doing for seasons--interacting with others in the community, especially Aaron and the ladies.  

Truly.  I really am loving my girl getting some quality Aaron and Rosita time.  It’s so long overdue.  

Bless sweet Kelly.  Riding off to her sister’s rescue.  

Why isn’t Lydia shown as part of these plans?  For someone that could barely read last season, I doubt that big ass map was a piece of cake for her and it’s all just guesswork anyway without her guidance.  I mean, why does it feel like they are cutting some of this stuff that might not seem like much plot-wise but would go a long way toward establishing different character beats?  Personally, I would have loved to see her involved in the search and sharing scenes again with Carol and bonding with Kelly. 

Virgil be having that “I always feel like somebody’s watching me” feeling.  Don’t you hate that, lol?  

“You haven’t slept in days.”  But how many days, Virgil?  I’m going to need a number because I’m confused AF about this timeline at this point.  What we’re seeing and what different pieces of dialogue is telling us is not exactly lining up.  I’m going to find it awful hilarious if it hasn’t even been two weeks since the cave in.  For reasons.  

Connie’s spidey senses are clearly tingling.  

Alrighty, then.  She’s clearly got PTSD.  Understandable.  They’ve all had it.  Some have been treated more sympathetically than others, though.  

I mean, it never seems to cross anybody’s mind how Carol probably sees Henry’s head on that pike, Mika’s pale and bloody body, Lizzie crumpled face down in a bed of yellow flowers, Sophia with a smoking bullet hole through her undead head whenever she closes her eyes but whatever.  

Okay though.  But what if Connie had really shitty, impossible to read handwriting?  AKA doctor’s  handwriting.  What then?  

Leah’s face honestly twists my insides whenever I see it, lol.  It’s quiet a visceral thing.  No, that does not make me a horrible person.  Not everybody wants or has to drink the awesome, great, redeemable villainess Kool-Aid.  IMHO, she’s got a face meant for a Walker.  Perfect makeover idea.  Eh.  Mostly it’s her expression and the deadness of her eyes.  

Anyway.  Why is it always the fingers?  Eff that.  

Listen.  If ya’ll can’t tell Daryl’s conflicted AF with the situation he’s landed in, you don’t know how to read NR’s face and eyes.  He’s not a masterclass like MMB but he’s pretty darn good when he wants to be.  

I honestly feel sorry for Redshirt Frost.  

“You do what you gotta do.”  Frost knows what’s what and he’s willing to walk the walk for Maggie.  Impressive loyalty.  I’m left wondering how the current, colder incarnation of Maggie inspired it because I’m still struggling to see it.  Anywho.  My point is the dude knows the score and just gave Daryl the okay.  

Daryl taking off his angel vest before stepping into the role of torturer/interrogator=him shedding the persona/the man Judith and RJ and Lydia and Carol know him to be.  Pushing away his man of honor status so he can just survive somehow.  

Pope never quits chewing whatever the hell he’s got in his mouth.  It’s kind of distracting.  

Ohhh.  We’re back to the Haunted Mansion.  I mean house.  Where are the Hitchhiking Ghosts?  

All the eyes scratched out of those creepy pictures=spooky.  

The good old fogged up bathroom mirror shot.  Somebody’s been watching and studying their horror movies, lol.  Not gonna lie though.  I’m legit bracing myself for the jump scares I know have to be coming.  

I’m loving the music/score in these scenes.  

Truthfully, I could care less about these Reapers.  But they are hella attractive, lol.  Listen.  Angela knows what she’s doing.  

Kelly’s horse is so pretty.  Prayer chain for that baby.  

More dead horses?  Why?  

Connie’s slingshot?  Sorry.  I maintain, no matter how much I like these two, that they have the lamest weapons ever.  Endless supply of Virginia rocks or not.  

So.  Did Virgil and Connie enjoy a little equine for dinner?  Did they kill it before the Walkers fed?  What monsters!  Yeah, no.  Not if they were starving even if I personally could not have.  The more probable story is they fled the camp in a panic and left the horse behind and then it went down.  Sorry.  I didn’t exactly study the wounds on the poor animal because it is so traumatizing to me to continue to see them meet such dastardly ends on this show.  I don’t know who the hell has such a score to settle with horses but stop it.  

Days.  It’s only been days.  Not weeks.  So many times with all that Daryl and Company have had to contend with since the cave in?  Those do not exist, lol.  They’re just a convenient, appeasing piece of dialogue thrown at a fanbase primed and ready to read everything into not much of anything.  There’s just not been enough time for it to happen unless Daryl has literally been up 24/7 for all of them.  You know, strategizing how to attack the remainders of Alpha’s horde, figuring out how to defend Hilltop before it fell, healing from the wound he sustained at Alpha’s hand, sitting on that log all damn night with Negan waiting on Carol to come home, having a lover’s quarrel with his best damn everything, taking care of the Grimes babies and Lydia, being the reluctant leader.  Kang, why you playing them like that?  Daryl’s a super guy but he’s not a superhuman with clones.  So many times my ass.  

Seriously.  Who been watching Connie and Virgil?  The MIA Oceansiders?  Beta’s Fee Fi Fo Fum Ghost?  

Nice.  A Michonne mention.  Maybe the truth will start to trickle out.  

LMAO at Connie’s “I’m not staying here.”  Me neither, girl.  I would be outta that house so fast.  

They really “Quiet Placing” this episode.  Honestly?  I’m kinda loving it.  

WTF was that?  I know she can’t hear but you telling me all the little hairs on her arms, legs, and neck didn’t stand the fuck up and say fuck this shit, I’m gone?  Pardon my language, lovelies, but that moment had my heart kicking up several beats.  

Okay, okay.  To be fair to Connie, every hair on her body been doing that since the front door closed.  Maybe they’re desensitized.  

Gollum’s chasing Connie!!!  He/She wants their Precious!!!

The knee jerk reactions about this episode sight unseen are OTT, honestly.  And I mean no disrespect by saying that.  I can understand completely where they’re coming from because we’ve been burned so long in this fandom.  But it’s obvious the spoiler source has their particular biases and reads into things in such a way that don’t line up with what’s actually being shown onscreen.  Daryl’s loyalty in this episode and all along quite clearly lies with his family and his community.  He’s been playing Leah since the start and is truly just trying to survive somehow.  

Awful thought.  The Reaper that’s so suspish of Daryl--haven’t quite caught his name or really cared to.  I feel like he might try to get to Daryl somehow.  When he realizes that Daryl cares no more for Leah than any human would care for somebody (they thought) they used to know?  He’s going after Dog.  Or Carol should she finally join this story. 

I refuse to believe Carol isn’t going to be a part of this story.  Because they messing with her mans, lol.  

“You’re ever with us or you’re not.”  Now where have I heard those words before?  I wish I could find that Daryl gif because that had to be one of the funniest things ever, lol.  

Unrealistic suggestion to Daryl, Leah?  Breathing oxygen seems to piss off Carver.  Oh look.  He finally has a name for me, lol.  

I love how all three of the ladies--Carol, Magna, and Rosita--look at Kelly with such indulgent, adoring “little sis, you alright?” eyes.  

They are seriously the most beautiful quartet of characters.  I mean all of them are lovely but Carol and Rosita this season?  Ugh.  The unfairness of the pretty.  

Human bones.  Terminus callback, lovelies.  How it all would have eventually gone down if Gareth and Co. hadn’t met the business end of Rick’s red machete.  

So many horror movie homages in this one.  

Virgil’s like “let’s leave this Texas Chainsaw Massacre behind.”  

Connie and Virgil have obviously bonded, ya’ll.  I’m surprised by how much I’m enjoying their scenes together when the character mostly got on my nerves with Michonne.  He’s a good actor and the core of his character is sympathetic, but I’m not going to lie.  I wasn’t super enthused when he was the one that rescued Connie because I didn’t know how their scenes would play out. But there’s a nice synergy there.  

Okay.  Does Carver want Leah for himself?  Because I’m sure Daryl at this point would love to scream “take her, I know where I fucking belong!”  

Daryl’s digging in deep because Carver has shown him Leah’s potential weak spot.  Nuance is truly lost on some people, LMAO.  He cares about Leah as a human being probably.  He’s Daryl, after all.  The sweet one.  But he sees her as his way outta this and he’s going to exploit it.  

It’s nice to have a silent Negan for once, lol.  I can pretend he didn’t take my baby Glenn away from me and enjoy JDM’s pretty.  

So.  These cannibal people were the watchers?  Hmm.  

I’m really digging Virgil 2.0.  Yeah.  Nobody’s surprised more than me.  

Sweet, sweet scene between Virgil and Connie.  His determination to reunite her with her family brings back the sympathy I felt for him when he told Michonne “I promised her flowers.  Every day.”  

Damn.  How many of those creepy crawly cannibals are there?  

How brave of Connie to confront her fears to save someone she’s obviously grown to care about.  

The Kelly/Connie reunion gave me chills and made me cry.  Thank fuck Angela didn’t cheapen that moment by having it focus on literally anybody else.  Kelly is the most important person in the whole world to Connie and vice versa.  Just like Carol is the most important person in the whole world to Daryl and vice versa.  Angela fucking knows.  Everybody does.  Except the people busy building castles out of sand while the waves of Carol’s and Daryl’s converging stories keep crashing closer and closer to shore.  

Such a beautiful moment given to us by Angel Theory and Lauren Ridloff.  So authentic and sweet.  Kelly and Connie are home to each other.  

Poor Frost.  That’s all I gotta say about that.  

WTF, though.  Was Mel just not available or what?  I want to see more of the ASZ characters that I care about, not the Reapers.  Like I’d be fine with the story if all the characters not named Maggie, Negan, or Daryl weren’t surviving on crumbs during it.  Especially the 2nd billed actress on the entire show.  Angela.  Please.  Fix this.  

One last WTF.  Seriously.  WTF has Maggie done to inspire Pope’s obsession?  It better be juicy after all this shit.  

Overall impression of the episode--

One of my favorites of the season so far.  The horror aspects were fantastic, IMHO. I truly didn’t expect to like Connie and Virgil’s scenes as much together so that was a nice surprise.  She got the reunion that felt most true and earned for the character and her story and I thank Angela from the bottom of my heart for that.  

I would have loved more Carol but I always want more Carol.  I’m okay with her taking a backseat because ultimately?  This was Kelly’s moment with her sister.  Carol and Connie will eventually have their time to sit down and talk.  And pick back up their blossoming friendship because I truly do not feel Connie blames Carol at all.  

I do wish Lydia had been included with the girl group.  Last episode felt like it was leading up to that.  

The Reaper storyline continues to be the weakest link because every time we see them the dialogue and interactions feel totally recycled from the time previous.  I feel like it would have totally been helped by a tighter focus and less stretching out because 8 episodes of this is really diluting what I feel like Angela and Co. are going for.  I’m not here for Leah being redeemed or being a bigger focus in any of the episodes because she does nothing of interest for me.  I’m just peeking in on that story for the Daryl of it all.  

Speaking of the Daryl? You lovelies out there gotta stop taking that spoiler source’s recaps at face value because it’s obvious to me at least that there’ some bias at work.  Every action and word coming from Daryl is coming from a place of loyalty to his family and wanting to protect them, no matter how he has to dirty his hands.  Leah is just a means to his ultimate end.  She’s not his future.  She never was.  His future’s already spoken for and 2023 can’t get  here soon enough.  But like Daryl, we have to just survive somehow.  

Oh goodie.  More Maggie and Negan next episode and looks like no real follow up on Connie and the ASZ reunions.  Hopefully, this is yet another instance of the previews being deceiving but I’m not holding my breath.  

Until later, lovelies.  

Hope my word vomit didn’t bore you too much.  

[picnic-at-dreaming-rock]

Top 5 New Books of 2020

A round up of the top 5 new books that I have read this year, full 2020 reading list found here

Warning for possible spoilers below the cut.

Please Don’t Hug Me - Kay Kerr

Erin is looking forward to Schoolies, at least she thinks she is. But things are not going to plan. Life is getting messy, and for Erin, who is autistic, that’s a big problem. She’s lost her job at Surf Zone after an incident that clearly was not her fault. Her driving test went badly even though she followed the instructions perfectly. Her boyfriend is not turning out to be the romantic type. And she’s missing her brother, Rudy, who left almost a year ago.

But now that she’s writing letters to him, some things are beginning to make just a tiny bit of sense.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I cannot stress enough how much I love this book. Growing up as an autistic teen girl, I really lack a lot of representation, both real and fictional, and this books is a huge step forward in remedying that. Written by an autistic woman (yes, this is an #ownvoices novel!), Please Don’t Hug Me shows autism in a new and beautiful light as to what is most commonly shown. Erin is no genius savant that is only autistic when plot relevant or has a lack of social skills used only for comedic relief, but instead a encapsulation of the ordinary and everyday autistic experience of just wanting to get through the day with as little meltdowns as possible while still maintaining your neurotypical facade.

The Dictionary of Lost Words - Pip Williams

In 1901, the word bondmaid was discovered missing from the Oxford English Dictionary. This is the story of the girl who stole it.

Motherless and irrepressibly curious, Esme spends her childhood in the Scriptorium, a garden shed in Oxford where her father and a team of lexicographers are gathering words for the very first Oxford English Dictionary.

Esme’s place is beneath the sorting table, unseen and unheard. One day, she sees a slip containing the word bondmaid flutter to the floor unclaimed. Esme seizes the word and hides  it in an old wooden trunk that belongs to her friend, Lizzie,  a young servant in the big house. Esme begins to collect other words from the Scriptorium that are misplaced, discarded or have been neglected by the dictionary men. They help her make sense of the world.

Over time, Esme realises that some words are considered more important than others, and that words and meanings relating to women’s experiences often go unrecorded. She begins to collect words for another dictionary: The Dictionary of Lost Words.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

One of my favourite parts about this novel is how perfectly it showed both misogyny and classism/elitism, and how they intertwined. Although it is set in the mid/late 19th century and early 20th century, there is this sense of relatability to it that I think I lot of people might be able to recognise. Williams deals with a lot topics that I don’t often see in other media, such as menstruation without fancy allusions or making it into anything other than what it is, pregnancy out-of-wedlock without it being seen as a character flaw on the woman’s part, and showing characters one might consider like a hag or spinster to be good people worth celebrating because of things that deem them lesser rather than despite it or not at all. One main criticism I do have with this book, however, is how it seems like William just adds tragedy for the sake of moving the plot forward/to add shock value or drama. I will admit, it did get me crying at some parts, it did get a little tedious and lack-luster to have the last half of the novel just be death after life-altering event after death after life-altering event. 

The Book Thief - Markus Zusak

It is 1939. Nazi Germany. The country is holding its breath. Death has never been busier, and will be busier still.

By her brother's graveside, Liesel's life is changed when she picks up a single object, partially hidden in the snow. It is The Gravedigger's Handbook, left behind there by accident, and it is her first act of book thievery. So begins a love affair with books and words, as Liesel, with the help of her accordian-playing foster father, learns to read. Soon she is stealing books from Nazi book-burnings, the mayor's wife's library, wherever there are books to be found.

But these are dangerous times. When Liesel's foster family hides a Jew in their basement, Liesel's world is both opened up, and closed down.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

I read this book for my advanced literature class earlier this year and it was a great choice on the schools part. Everyone in my class enjoyed it, even if a lot of us were crying by the end of the novel. The book itself is rich with literary techniques that enrich the actual reading if you are one of those people that like to dissect what they read. I think Zusak made a really good choice with having Death narrate, as well as how he tied in his own experiences/interjections in these mini vignette-type extracts which I found really enhanced both the overall atmosphere and environment. The only qualm I have is that there were a lot of questions left unanswered that made the story feel somewhat empty.

Picnic at Hanging Rock - Joan Lindsay

It was a cloudless summer day in the year nineteen hundred.

Everyone at Appleyard College for Young Ladies agreed it was just right for a picnic at Hanging Rock. After lunch, a group of three of the girls climbed into the blaze of the afternoon sun, pressing on through the scrub into the shadows of Hanging Rock. Further, higher, till at last they disappeared.

They never returned.

Whether Picnic at Hanging Rock is fact or fiction the reader must decide for themselves.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

I watched the Foxtel miniseries first a couple years and thoroughly enjoyed it and sought out the novel very quickly afterwards. I will be honest, I picked the novel up first around 2018/19 and dropped it until earlier this year when I reread/finished it and loved it. Lindsay’s ability to create this perfect and constant juxtaposition between the natural Australian bush and the intruding colonialism is really amazing and adds this interesting aesthetic that the academia community on this site seems to enjoy. There is also a really interesting dynamic between the female characters (which is most of the characters, to be fair) and they feel complete and authentic, something that doesn’t always exist in other works of literature. There is also one canon queer character, but there is so much subtext in the novel for so many other characters that it feels purposeful. All in all, this is the gayest straight book I ever read.  

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins

It is the morning of the reaping that will kick off the tenth annual Hunger Games. In the Capital, eighteen-year-old Coriolanus Snow is preparing for his one shot at glory as a mentor in the Games. The once-mighty house of Snow has fallen on hard times, its fate hanging on the slender chance that Coriolanus will be able to outcharm, outwit, and outmaneuver his fellow students to mentor the winning tribute.

The odds are against him. He's been given the humiliating assignment of mentoring the female tribute from District 12, the lowest of the low. Their fates are now completely intertwined -- every choice Coriolanus makes could lead to favor or failure, triumph or ruin. Inside the arena, it will be a fight to the death. Outside the arena, Coriolanus starts to feel for his doomed tribute... and must weigh his need to follow the rules against his desire to survive no matter what it takes.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

The Hunger Games was one of the series in primary school that rocked my literary world (joining the ranks of The Great Brain, Harry Potter and The Books of Beginning) and helped inspire my love of reading, and when I heard about a prequel I was over the moon with nostalgia. I found it a couple days after its release at Target for $16 and I loved it. I finished it in about a week and I could barely put it down. I loved reading how the hunger games came to be and how they ended up the way they were, as well as advancing Collins’ previously established and incredible world building. The book also adds upon the themes in the original trilogy of government corruption, classism, elitism, individualism and propaganda, but from those that benefit from it (e.g. Snow) instead of those that suffer (e.g. Katniss). I have seen some criticism from people about not liking it being from Snow’s perspective but I personally think that it was the perfect choice, as no other character’s story would be able to add to the story in such a meaningful way.

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

I made my first comic today and wrote a fic for it!! I’ve been super inspired by Animaniacs lately with the reboot coming and the poster that was officially revealed. I’m not the best artist in the entire world but I want to get better so constructive criticism is welcomed.

I stood outside the party venue on the Warner Movie lot. It was my first time being at a big party like this and since I was the newest character for this reboot it was imperative that I be there to celebrate with everybody and meet my voice actress Marceline Alderson. The wardrobe department had talked me into wearing high heels for the event and so far they were being my worst enemy. I had almost fallen on my face multiple times that evening it made me wonder how in the world Dot felt so confident in these infernal shoes. It was a little bit colder in the party room so Yakko had leant me his suit jacket. His tie matched the dark blue color of my dress something that his younger siblings had been teasing him about for most of the night.


“Sorry if I kept you waiting long Lizzy, these Hollywood folks are a lot harder to leave than one might think. I guess they just love me too much.” Yakko’s voice startled me out of my thinking and I just laughed at the goofball in front of me.


“Sure keep telling yourself that, I think that the real party starts after you leave.” I teased and he just looked at me aghast as if I had offended him.


“I think you’ve been hanging around Dot a little bit too much sweetheart.” He shot back at me and I laughed at my best friend that I was next to.


“That’s probably true sorry if that sounded mean.” I apologized and Yakko just laughed openly at me.


“And there’s the Liz that I know. We’ve got to work on that over apologizing if you’re going to be in show business.” He reminded me and I looked down at my high heels with a small frown on my face.


“I know it’s not your strongest suit but this town will chew you up and spit you out if you apologize for every little thing. It’s like the eye contact problem that you had a few months ago!! We make it into a game.” The eldest of the trio encouraged me reminding me of a few months back when TP was getting on my case about not being able to look people in the eye. Me and Wakko made it into a game where we would just stare blankly at each other and the first one to burst into laughter at a funny face lost.

“How are your feet doing?” He asked me looking at the blister that had started to grow after I put them on.


“I hate them but I think I can get back to the water tower in one piece. Just put it on the calendar that I am forever wearing Mary Janes to these things from this day forward. I’m not letting wardrobe talk me out of it.” I looked up at the moon and the stars that were glittering all around us. The first time I saw them from the rooftop of the water tower it was like I had never seen them before.


“Good for you stick up for yourself. I know that even the dress was a change of pace for you but you really do look beautiful.” He complimented and I felt a soft pink hue start to spread across my cheeks.


“I probably look really strange with leggings on underneath this nice dress. It was the only way that I would feel comfortable in it. I’m getting better about wearing skirts and dresses but I’ll always be the same soccer loving tomboy.” I sighed a little bit thumbing the ends of the suit jacket. It was so sweet of him to give me his jacket in there when I was nervously shivering before my introduction.

“I don’t think that you look strange at all. You look like yourself and I wouldn’t change you for anything in the world. I think that you really are truly beautiful in just about anything you wear but especially tonight.” I rolled my eyes with a soft smile and a punch to his right shoulder lightly.


“Don’t think that this means that I’m perfectly not capable of kicking your ass.” I threatened and he just laughed openly at me.


“Oh Liz I think that I would actually enjoy that so I wouldn’t go throwing that threat around.” He joked winking at me and I blushed a flaming hot pink.


“Too far?” He asked me and I shook my head with a small laugh at him as we started walking back towards the water tower.


“No it’s alright, I don’t think that you could ever go too far in my opinion.” I hummed my comfort song under my breath, one of the first things that Yakko noticed about me was the fact that I hummed the main theme song from Emperor’s New Groove whenever I got nervous about something. It calmed me down and brought me back to a place of innocence snuggled up in front of the television.


“Was this night too much for you? I noticed that you were humming that song a lot even though it was quiet.” I had been sitting next to my best friend so I figured that he would have been blind to not notice that I was suffering deep down.


“A little bit, I just wasn’t used to being the center of attention. You weren’t the only one to notice. I think Marceline definitely did because she started doing it with me.” I smiled softly thinking about how my voice actress fit both my personality and the type of voice that I had so that children could hear the real me.


“So you’re happy with the person that Rob picked out to voice you?” I nodded my head with a small laugh thinking about the goofball who voiced my goofball.


“I’m actually really happy, she was amazing!! Anybody who will join me in singing that song is automatically my favorite person. You of all people should know that.” He was one of the few people that would sing it with me before every filming.

“It’s actually really fun and a good warm up for my singing too since it’s fast. I realized pretty quickly that it was one of the few things that you were genuinely confident at. Plus I thought that it was adorable that your ultimate favorite Disney movie is the one that is the least like a Disney movie.” I laughed at my best friend holding my arms out a little bit so that I wouldn’t trip like I had done countless times that night. My voice actress had been smart and wore flats telling me that she had the same problem. She wore a really funky looking dress that she told me was Minnie Mouse’s from the Soundsational parade.


“Hey that movie was my childhood, at least one of the better parts of it. It was one of the few times that me and my five siblings would all sit down and shut up so we could watch something together.” I sighed a little bit missing that idea of home that I had grown up with. I hadn’t heard from any of my family members even after the big announcement was made that I was going to be their newest character. It saddened me but at the same time I couldn’t find it in myself to really be all that surprised. My parents were infamous for being the worst after all leaving me here all by myself just telling me to not die.


“Have you heard from any of them since they announced that you were going to be the newest character?” I shook my head putting my hands into the pockets of his suit jacket. He put his arm around my shoulders comfortingly.


“If they don’t want to be a part of your life now than they never will. I’m sorry but it’s true. They might try and come back into your life later on down the line but don’t let them. They all but gave you up just because you don’t conform to societies rules. That was one of the first things that I admired about you. You’re you and there isn’t anybody out there in the whole wide world that is like you Liz.” I nodded because he was right and I knew that it just didn’t mean that those words didn’t hurt me in some way.


“I know it’s okay, I don’t care anymore. Maybe I used to because I thought that it was something that was my fault but I realized through being friends with you guys that being yourself isn’t something to be ashamed of. I like wearing shorts with holes in them, ripped jeans, band tees but I also love wearing the white dress shirt with suspenders and skirt that I have to wear for the show. They wouldn’t accept that part of me and that’s not my fault. Besides I found you and your siblings so I’m not sad anymore. I was always sad living in my childhood home. For all I know they’re not even in California anymore.” He kissed my forehead gently as we walked together in the cold night air.


“If they aren’t it’s probably for the best. It’s like your favorite wise old monkey once said, oh yes the past can hurt but you can either run from it or learn from it.” He tried to change his naturally high pitched voice into one that was lower and wiser and it cracked midway through resulting in me clutching my sides and tearing up I was laughing so hard.


“I need that to be the voice of Rafiki from now on that’s amazing…” I trailed off and he smirked a little bit at me.


“You know the first thing that ever stood out to me about you?” He asked me and I shook my head my ears bobbing.


“It was your laugh, the first time you ever laughed like that I knew you were different.” I looked down at the ground but I didn’t see that at that exact moment my ankle twisted in exactly the wrong way in these devil shoes and I started to tumble a little bit.


“Liz!!” Thankfully Yakko with his quick reflexes caught me. I felt my ankle throb in pain and it kept everything in me not to start crying.


“Hey, hey, hey it’s okay I’ve got you. It’s alright to cry when you’re in pain. I shouldn’t have said that at that exact moment. I’m sorry.” He apologized and I felt the tears slowly start to slip from my eyes looking down and seeing his suit jacket lying on the ground.


“Here I’ll get that for you.” He dusted it off carefully before slipping it back over my shoulders and kneeling so that he could talk to easier.


“I can carry you bridal style, if it would make you more comfortable to do piggy back that’s an option as well. Just leave the devil shoes here wardrobe can come and get them in the morning. I’m used to carrying Dot to bed during most movie nights still so I’m sure I can do it.” I nodded my head weakly. I felt his arm carefully pick me up and I whimpered in pain.


“We’ll take you to the infirmary tomorrow make sure that it isn’t broken. If it is then I take full responsibility it was my flirting that got you here.” He apologized and I looked up into those dark eyes that I had loved so much as a child and loved even more as a teenager.


“It wasn’t your fault Yakko. Thank you for carrying me. I hope that I’m not too heavy.” I protested and he just kissed my forehead hugging me closer to him. 
“Nonsense your light as a feather Liz. In fact you could probably do with putting on a few pounds.” He reminded me of how skinny I had been a few months ago. He carried me back to the water tower carefully putting me back down on the couch and I hissed when he put an ice pack on my ankle.


“Would a distraction and some hot chocolate help?” He asked me already knowing me too well as he waved my favorite movie in front of me. He went to go and make my favorite warm drink and came back with a mini marshmallow smile on it. He sat down next to me and put two pillows over his lap before putting my ankle on top of it.


“It helps to keep it elevated. I’m really proud of you for how strong you were tonight. Getting through most of that party even after Scratchy had to take Wak and Dot back here to get some sleep. You put on a brave face even though I know your feet had to have been killing you. I’m really sorry about all this.” He apologized and I just shook my head with a small smile on my face. Him taking care of me was unsurprisingly sweet. He probably had to deal with a lot of injuries dealing with his siblings and it warmed my heart that he had taken such careful care of me.

[youspeakshit]

know more about me tag!

thank you @kateyboosh for tagging me! this is a fun one. :D

Name: bianca

Nicknames: honestly so many... bi, bibi, bia, biba, bibs, b, bonka... anything you feel like calling me I’ll probably be like ‘oh ok! that can be a thing!’ 😂

Gender: female

Sexuality: bisexual

Height: 1.73m or 5'8'' (literally googled ‘173cm in american’)

Language: portuguese and english (and a bit of spanish if I really try)

Nationality: brazilian

Current time: 18:38 or 6:38pm 

Favorite season: spring! a t-shirt and a light coat over it, that’s the perfect weather. 

Favorite scent: old books, new books, all the books. get a book open it and give it the good sniff. appreciate the paper. celebrate the tree that gave it life!!! also lavender and this thing called ylang-ylang which I just recently discovered and it smells incredible.

Favorite color: I wanna say black and yellow but idk I love so many colors. 

Favorite animals: I always had a thing for white tigers.

Favorite fictional characters: hawkeye pierce, howard moon, vince noir, mr darcy, lizzie bennet, trapper mcintyre, the whole main gang from will & grace. I feel like there’s more but my mind has gone blank...

Normal amount of sleep: my body usually wakes up after 5 or 6 hours but just this week I had anything from 0 to 2 to 8 😂

Number of blankets you sleep with: usually two but right now four because of winter.

Dogs or cats: dogs!

Dream trip: Japan and Egypt!!! sadly both quite expensive

Dream job: graphic designer at a magazine (paper isn’t dying!! go away!!!). right now I work at a newspaper which is fairly close to a mag and I do really like my job, but it has a lot of limitations creatively bc of the format. I still can do fun/cool things from time to time, just not as much as I would in a magazine. also newsprint’s grey tone kills all the beauty of colors lol

Followers: 577

Blog established: I actually went back to find my first post: may 27th 2010, woo!

Reason for my url: I was part of a snowboarding community on LJ back then lmao so it’s from a video with Mikkel Bang (norwegian snowboarder) saying to a french guy: "you speak french and I don't understand shit". and I just shortened it. I have changed it a few times but always change back.

Random fact: inspired by Katey’s answer, I can’t whistle. 😂 but I can wiggle/move my ears! independently, even!!

I feel like everyone on my dash has done this one, so tagging anyone that hasn’t and feels like doing it. :D

[peterstanslizzie]

Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.31 (Gordo’s Bar Mitzvah)

Here we have Gordo with his never-before-seen therapist parents

- Walking along the school hallway are Lizzie and Gordo who are talking about a movie they’ve just seen (Planet of the Apes I’m guessing?). Miranda interrupts them and informs Lizzie that Ethan is getting a dirtbike for his birthday.

- And of course, Gordo still doesn’t care. Will he ever stop complaining about his friends talking about Ethan in the way they do or at least stop pretending to be so oblivious towards understanding their attraction towards him? I get it; They tend to act a little over the top but sometimes it’s okay for them to have their fan-girl moments.  

They do love a man in a uniform, huh? 

- Larry then shows up and asks what all the fuss is about to which Miranda excitingly replies to him saying that Ethan is all grown up. It is revealed that Larry has already started to shave. Hence why he has little bits of would tape all over his face to cover his cuts from the razor blade I suppose. Yikes!

To me, he looks like he has zits that he had covered up

- So, it looks like both Ethan and Larry are starting to go through the stages of maturity or puberty, which Lizzie notices as well. And she even compares them to Gordo and concludes that they are maturing faster than him, which is true but she doesn’t need to say it because that kinda low-key offended Gordo.

If You Didn’t Know, Gordo is Jewish

- At the school courtyard during lunch soon after, Gordo starts acting weirder than usual as he calls Lizzie, Elizabeth and Miranda as Miss Sanchez. He definitely feels like he is falling behind the other boys in his grade and is trying to overcompensate.

- He is also facing the added pressure from his parents on deciding when his Bar Mitzvah ceremony should be since he is Jewish. If I’m not wrong, isn’t this the first time that Gordo has revealed to us that he is Jewish? And clearly, his friends probably haven’t asked him much questions about his religion because they are finding out about all of this at the same time as we are.

Lizzie wants that money honey 

- Gordo goes on to explain what goes on during the ceremony, which sounds really exciting, especially the getting money part for Lizzie and Miranda lol. He also notes that his parents are leaving it up to Gordo on when he wants to have his Bar Mitzvah because for them, growing up, they didn’t have much of a choice. How progressive of his parents!

-  But Gordo feels like he missed his chance since he already turned 13. Plus, they just don’t see the value of being considered an adult at that age just because it’s technically not an adult age. 

When Does a Boy Become a Man?

- The next day, Gordo tells his friends that he had actually interviewed a few men about their journey in becoming full-fledged men, which actually includes both Lizzie and Miranda’s dads. How did he manage to do all of that in one night? Impressive.

Hold up! Weren’t these two guys in the episode, Rated Arghh? Like wasn’t the guy on the right choking on a sourball and Lizzie had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on him? And also, why are they always seen together? Hmm....

- Edit: Their names are actually David Rosen and Jeremy Bargiel both on-screen and in real-life. They were actually writers on the show. How neat! And I also discovered that the writers on Lizzie Mcguire considered them to be a couple on-screen but they weren’t given the opportunity by Disney to make their relationship explicit.

- The interview features all of these men explaining the moments in their lives where they felt like they have become men and it’s usually with their own dads. For instance, for Sam, it was when he first started to learn how to drive and for Eduardo, Miranda’s dad, it was when he first met his wife, Daniella. 

- Their stories have inspired Gordo to do the same things as them in hopes of  becoming a man himself. And we get a compilation of him doing just that from driving a car to attempting to get a tattoo. I thought you must be at least 18 to be allowed to get a tattoo? I need to stop seeing things from our own reality lol.

Whose car is that anyways?

- Unsurprisingly, things don’t go as planned and Gordo is feeling disappointed. He really wants to know the exact moment where he crosses over into manhood. I mean, as an adult myself, you really don’t know when exactly the moment is. For me, it was when I started paying taxes lol and that was at the age of 22. So yea...

- I appreciate Lizzie and Miranda for trying to relate to Gordo and sympathize with him. In some way, boys and girls share similar experiences when it comes to puberty but I guess it’s much easier for Gordo to have an actual guy friend to talk to about all of this stuff. I mean, I’ve been saying this all along; Gordo needs a guy friend his age!

Another emotionally-charged moment between Lizzie and her dad

- At home, Lizzie tells her dad about the issues Gordo’s facing and Sam reminisces to her about his time as a kid and honestly, it was beautiful to hear what it was like for him. It warms my heart because the things he did as a kid that he remembers after all these years were so innocent. He also touches on the responsibilities of being an adult and a dad and how it’s rewarding being able to go to bed at night knowing that he has provided for his family.

We Finally Meet Gordo’s Parents! 

This is not a drill everyone! Here are Gordo’s therapist parents in the flesh!

- Gordo is discussing with his parents about the Bar Mitzvah he was supposed to have almost a year ago and he expresses how he doesn’t feel like they should have let him decide on when his ceremony should be since it’s already too late. 

- His parents, whose names are Howard and Roberta Gordon tell him that it isn’t too late and they think he is ready because they can see that their son has put a lot of effort into researching about the ceremony. Oh and it’s so cute that they watch every single film he has made to date. Gordo now feels like he’s ready. Finally lol.

- Towards the end of the episode, we are taken to Gordo’s highly-anticipated Bar Mitzvah ceremony! 

Lizzie and Miranda always makes great fashion choices

Miranda’s parents are also there as well. Love these two!

- We then see Gordo on-stage giving a speech about his transition in becoming  a man. To summarize, he says that the moment that marked his transition should be something that’s right for him. He also mentions about the different stories from the various men he interviewed and how he is able to realize who he is and the kind of person he isn’t. Lastly, he just sees his Bar Mitzvah as the mark of this transition instead of a tattoo, a dirtbike or any other sort of thing. 

It’s amazing how Gordo invited all of the interviewees to his special day. Also, Larry and Ethan were invited too! So does this mean that he’s friends with them? Or did he just invite his entire class?

- He then reads a portion from the Torah, all in Hebrew. Despite myself not understanding a single thing, it sounded beautiful. 

What a way to end an episode!

B-Plot: Sam Is In-Charge

- What’s an episode of Lizzie Mcguire without having to watch Matt’s crazy (or annoying) antics? This time, he was caught stealing oranges from a tree that belongs to their neighbor, Mrs Robinson...for the 4th time that week. 

- When Sam tells Mrs Robinson, “Boys Will Be Boys”, I rolled my eyes because that’s one of the weakest excuses for poor behaviour. I gotta be honest. Even Jo was looking at her husband in disbelief.

- Matt is much more precarious that the average 10/11 year old. He even sold her oranges to his classmates at school to make a profit. I mean, that’s pretty smart of him to do but it all gets crossed out because they weren’t his oranges in the first place. 

Look at Sam trying to discipline Matt. You sure showed him...

- Jo, who I actually thought would severely punish Matt pulls the classic move that usually works on Matt, which is basically to not do anything. It’s just like in episode 1.2 (Picture Day), where she went along with Matt pretending to be sick to the point where he actually suffers in the end. This time, she is leaving her husband in-charge of the disciplining. This definitely isn’t going to end well. Poor Sam!

- Later on, we see Sam trying to be the disciplinary of the family and let’s just say he isn’t doing a good job. And it doesn’t help that Matt is being completely uncooperative and coming up with excuses for his actions. I wish Matt would try acting this way in an Asian or African household. He would be running for the hills lol. 

- Jo witnesses all of this and decides to stay quiet and let her husband handle it as planned. That’s pretty much what she does for every complaint that they’re getting from their neighbors as one after the other pays a visit to their house with Matt by their side to tell them what pesky little thing Matt had done to them this time. Let’s see how long that will last.

This one takes the cake for me. But hey, at least Coco looks pretty cute with that look

- Sam seems to be a his wits end about all of this but he isn’t doing a good job coming up with Matt’s punishments. The most he can dish out is sending Matt to his room. But Jo isn’t the one to talk; her punishments are that much worse either. 

- As this plot progresses, we can see that Sam is surprisingly starting to go a little overboard with the punishments and doesn’t know what the right balance is because for something as small as oversleeping, he punishes Matt by making him clean the house, mow the lawn and wash his car. Wow, that is intense. Sam needs to use a little bit of common sense here. 

We can see here that Matt misses getting punishments from his mom and that Jo misses giving him punishments. Umm, okay. Anyways, this whole plot ends with Jo going back to be the main disciplinary for the kids. 

Overall Thoughts

- And there we have it! The last episode review for Season 1! This season definitely ended on a high note. This is probably my favorite Gordo-centric episode thus far because I was able relate to Gordo’s personal struggles. And I’m sure a lot of other boys and even girls were able to relate to this as well.

- It’s wonderful to see Jewish culture being portrayed on a Disney Channel show just like how Andi Mack did it years later with the character, Cyrus Goodman and they did a great job introducing the different elements of a Bar Mitzvah and letting the audience know the purpose or importance of having the ceremony. I’ve never seen so much comradery between different people from different walks of life coming together to support someone, which is Gordo in this case. It’s really something special to watch.

- Another thing I love about this episode was how they are able to tie in the B-plot with the A-plot and I’m mostly referring to that sentimental scene between Sam and Lizzie. But I must say that Matt was pretty tolerable in this episode too and I found the way he expressed to Jo that he misses his mom’s punishments to be really sweet. 

[the-writerly-night-owl]

Something About a Legacy

Desire and Decorum/ Inspired by the main story and minor MC x Ernest 

Summary: 4 girls, a few of the descendants of Clara and Ernest discover just how their ancestors met and where the Sinclaire family is in the future. 

Authors Note: so they mention where Duke Richard’s Karlington is in the 21st Century (Madeleine and Godfrey) and I wanted to write something where we see what happened to the Earl of Edgewater title. 41 Days of Cheer day 10 Ancestor. This was actually super long and this really condensed from what it originally was. Also yes this is my OH MC, I intended her to be a descendant. 

I’m probably not going to get many notes for this but happy reading!  

Clarissa Sinclaire had been to London before, in fact she had done a project studying her family here. So this wasn’t new to her. It was exciting to meet the family she had never met before. After all this was the Sinclaire family reunion.

Outside of the impressive mansion (boy was it big!) stood another family member aimlessly texting on her phone.

Someone at the door was already ushering them in. It was even prettier on the inside as they stopped in the foyer. Clarissa tried to remember the details of the email. Everyone finally gathered in the main living room as she glanced around. Besides her cousin Hannah she didn’t know anyone else. She went to Hartfeld too as the two hugged. She couldn’t help but feel horrible for Hannah as her brother Jonathon had died in a car accident.

“Are you okay Hannah?” she asked as she squeezed her hand.

“I’m good,” she said as they turned attention to those around them.

“Now, I say let’s go around and get to know each other,” said the girl as she grinned at them. “Um, just to get better acquainted, me, my sister, and my brothers are your grandpa’s brother’s grandkids.” She gestured to the slightly younger girl as she grinned widely. “I’m Lizzie Sinclaire, Elizabeth if you’re my mother and angry with me. I sit in parliament, I have a law degree and all.  Oh and I’m getting married at the end of August.”

She gestured for her sister to go next as she took that as a sign to introduce herself.

“I’m Paige Sinclaire,” she said as she clapped her hands together. “Um, I’m a certified midwife and obgyn.” She made a face as she tried to think of something else to describe herself. “I enjoy meat lovers pizza.”

The rest of the girls smiled as Paige laughed at herself for thinking of something completely random. She nodded to the next person as she seemed to be relaxed and confident.

“Clarissa Sinclaire,” she said smoothly.  “I’m a doctor at Edenbrook Hospital in Boston. I’m married and have two kids but couldn’t really bring them. Ethan is a doctor too and has a schedule that’s a little bit stricter than mine.”

She nodded to Hannah as she seemed to be last.

“I’m Hannah Sinclaire,” she said feeling a little foolish adding her last name, everyone had that last name. “I also graduated from Hartfeld too, except my undergrad is in history. I’m going back to get my graduate degree in psychology though.”

It was relaxed as everyone seemed to know each other a little better. Lizzie started to pass around a paper.

“Alright so I figured since we’re here for a few weeks setting up and the reunion. We could have some fun. We have a few items to find but that’s about it. The list is what we need.”

She peered at it and grinned. Perfect, just a few ancestral items that they’d display during the reunion.

 The list of what they were looking for passed around as she folded hers and stuck it in her back pocket. The others started to pair off to make things easier. There were only four of them and two to a few rooms didn’t sound horrible. Hannah and Lizzie started toward one wing. Paige and Clarissa in the other direction.

Ledford was beautiful, she thought, as they looked down at the list.

“So, we’re looking for a few different items, it looks like we already have a pocket watch engraved with a message from Lydia Sinclaire on it. Then a tiara dating back to William the Conqueror? Dang, I didn’t know we had that family far back. We’re looking for a sword, a WWI medal…” She listed off each item as she best as she could and the note saying that they could keep whatever caught their fancy. Neat.

For the next half hour or so the girls swiftly cleared out as many rooms as they could. Finally she and Paige found themselves in a small office area with books on one shelf and the window overlooking the front.

Curious Clarissa studied the books on the shelf. Each of them had a name engraved on the side of different names: Hannah, Marie, Lydia, Clara, Josephine. The books stretched on depending on the name. Hannah had roughly thirty books, meanwhile Emma had two. What kind of books were these, she thought, before pulling the one at the top of the shelf off.

Clarissa guessed that all the books were in order as she dusted off the shelf. Everything in this room hadn’t been touched anytime recently. Her fingers ran over the spines as she pulled out the first one with the name Clara on it. She pulled it out curious as that was her middle name.

She went and started to read those forgetting that she was supposed to be cleaning.

Good afternoon, morning, night, or whenever you may be reading this. Thank you for taking time to read my writing and what advice that I must give to you. The next mistress of Ledford will be my son’s wife, I trust that you will take care of him and love him just as much as I do. I am not with child yet, but I hope to be soon. I always wanted a big family and I think Ernest would love a few sons.

Let me start by introducing myself. My name is Clara Sinclaire (nee Mills) and I am fifteen years old – I only jest – I am really twenty. I will take the first few pages of my journal to introduce myself and then clear up all the misunderstanding that has surrounded me for nearly a year now. I hope the next mistress reading this will understand the truth and what I have gone through. To start I will let you know that my father was the Earl of Edgewater, Vincent. My mother an opera singer, Mary Mills.

Time went by fast as she got enraptured with the story.

“Clarissa are you okay?” asked Heather as she saw her. Cleaning was pretty much done for the first day and they were talking about sightseeing tomorrow. Since she had been to London before she could show them some of her favorite spots.

“Yea, I’m just reading these old diaries left behind from our great however many grandmothers. They have all these cool and interesting stories. I mean listen to some of this stuff.”

She turned and flipped to a page and started to read:

Ernest and I had an amazing wedding night. Just thinking about it makes my skin quiver in joy. He had taken me to our room. And we stripped bare down to nothing. The way he touched me made me feel a warmth between my legs I’ve never felt before. He had used his cravat to tie my hands above my head as he just wanted to touch me. Closing my eyes I let him.

Being frank the way he entered me and to feel his manhood enter me just wanted to make me scream and I did. I couldn’t wait to make him feel…”

The rest of the girls gasped and shared excited looks.

“Hot damn.”

“You go girl let him work his magic,” said Clarissa with a smirk. “Sounds like me and Ethan.”

“Oh my gosh this is a gold mine,” said Hannah. “Look! This moment sounds so sweet listen.”

Ernest and I held our new baby in our arms nearly the entire night. I probably slept for only a few hours. I already learned how to help change him and rock him to sleep. We have chosen to name him Vincent after my father. We probably would have never met without him.”

Together all the girls visibly awed at the thought. Then flipped through the pages as carefully as possible picking out passages to read to each other.

Ernest and I had celebrated ten years married together! That’s right ten years and we have so much to be thankful for. We have many children that would make my father proud and Lady Grandmother appalled at the sheer number. I feel loved and happy to live to see each new day. I can’t wait for 1827 and what it will bring for us this new year’s. I can’t wait to tell him that I am with child once again.

Again, another aww echoed through the room as they picked out another passage.

I watched Vincent marry Bishop Monroe’s niece with pride in my eyes and squeezed Ernest’s hand. He could only smile back and assure me in my ear that everything was perfect. But that nothing would outdo our wedding. We had never felt prouder as we exchanged a rather chaste kiss. Later we would resume that action later.

I, Clara Sinclaire, do declare that I only want my children to marry for love. I want them to feel just as strong emotions and me and Ernest do. Vincent and Amelia are great friends and even better with each other. This is how I feel about my husband and my friends with their partners.”

“You know this is rather cool to learn about our ancestors this way. I wonder if we’ll ever share our legacy like this,” said Clarissa. “Maybe one day, I’m glad that my kids last names are Ramsey-Sinclaire.”

“I wish we could meet them,” said Hannah. “I mean Clara sounds like fun.”

“Yea, why don’t we display these books?” asked Paige, “Just like a part of their story and how we came to be. I vote for when she kicked duke Richards in the nuts at some point.”

The girls burst out into laughter and nodded that was one of the best parts next to the wedding.

“Yes, that has to be displayed. I mean why not?” said Lizzie. “Just think 200 years later they have a family still standing with a title and everything.”

“True although why couldn’t our grandfather be the earl?” teased Hannah.

“Because he wasn’t born first,” said Lizzie shaking her head but smiling all the same. “That’s my dad that’s earl of Edgewater and my older brother will get that title next. And then my nephew, wow, that seems so surreal.”

They found a good place to display some of the pages and only looked on at the other souvenirs of their family with pride. Clara and Ernest Sinclaire had well over hundreds of descendants who would never know their ancestors. This was just that special connection that brought them all together. Many would come over the next couple of days to see just how cool their ancestors really were.

Tag list: @flyawayboo @fluffy-cat-whisper @am-i-invisible777 @adrianadmirer @melodyofgraves @symonde @paisleylovergirl @elainew13 @itsbrindleybinch @brightpinkpeppercorn @darley1101 @mfackenthal @jlpplays1 @writerapprentice @indescribablechoices @wildsayeed @princess-geek @perriewinklenerdie @lilyofchoices 

Of possible interest: @hellooliviaolivia @noeschoices 

[hua-fei-hua]

pride & prejudice au!!!!!! I actually haven’t read/watched it myself I just really like the Vibes yknow?? it’s on the to read list that I don’t have the motivation to start working on oops,, v v intrigued abt the rest of your fic pitches but I’ll save that for another ask 👀

you should watch the lizzie bennet diaries!!! it’s how i got the story of pride and prejudice (since i am also illiterate), and it’s super duper fun!! the kind of storytelling they use where it’s like the main characters vlogging their perspectives (and also employing other social media in real time for bonus plotty bits that aren’t necessary when binge watching the series) is the kind of storytelling i’m trying to emulate in some of my stories such as Bb, where the audience may have the privilege of knowing what’s going on (the people who read the book before, the people who read both rhythm and moment), but not having that privilege just adds to a different kind of fun when experiencing the story

i feel like you’re mostly curious abt the pitches doc bc it’s 203 pages long rn lol. if you want you can pick a number between 469 and 703 (since that covers the vast majority of my bnha ideas) and i can give you the gist of what happens lol

anyway the pride n prejudice au is WAY too long for its own good (bc there is absolutely no clean one-to-one character translation going on), so i’m gonna put this under a cut knowing that tumblr will probably mess it up anyway

so the au is still a regency era romance despite it being the modernized lizzie bennet diaries that inspired it because i am an absolute sucker for regency romances ahhh. 

mic and aizawa run this little orphanage in town, and their main five tenants are jirou, momo, uraraka, mina, and kirishima, who are all roughly the same age bc i see no reason to make it really matter here. they’re the main characters that we follow around, but the main-main character whose perspective this story is mostly told from is jirou. 

so, rich boy todoroki has recently moved into this nearby house, and due to social standards, he has to throw this huge party where everyone is invited to go. so obviously, our mains absolutely must go. there, tdmm meets, falls in love at first sight blah blah blah, they’re the jane and mr. bingley of this au. they fall in love, and things are beautiful for a while. 

now, at the party, kaminari asks jirou to dance with him, but she turns it down despite it being like, rude/socially bad, because his behavior just irritates her to no end (bc she doesn’t understand him yet). anyway, then she spends most of her night commiserating with bakugou (who’s actually gonna have to start this story out as a toxic little shit i’m so sorry bakugou just know that i love you still ;-;) about how annoying kaminari is, and they strike up a very far-from-exemplary friendship like that.

anyway, so kirishima actually sees bakugou as someone who just needs a little tlc, y’know? just a little bit of love, a little fixer-upper. this is a bad idea, but his arc basically revolves around learning that you can’t fix someone who doesn’t want to get better, that you need to take care of yourself before you can take care of others, and that sometimes the best way to let someone heal is to distance yourself from them. there’s a lot of fun krbk drama that goes down in this au

anyway, so pretty soon after the todoroki housewarming party, kirishima sets out to visit bakugou’s home in a different town with his head full of ideas abt power of love n stuff; at around this time, momo receives an invitation to stay at the todoroki house for a while, but the only way to get aizawa n mic to agree is if she took jirou with her, so jirou goes too

surprise!! turns out that tart kaminari is living there too!! how dare!!! anyway, kaminari confesses/proposes to jirou, who turns him down kinda like “ew gross how many girls have you asked before me, huh?”

meanwhile, kirishima’s approached bakugou, but bakugou isn’t exactly in the proper headspace for anything to be effective, complicated krbk backstory stuff happens where i guess all you really need to know is that kirishima kind of sees himself reflected in bakugou (bc remember orphanage and whatever), and that’s what motivates him to put so much work into him

eventually though, kirishima gets tired out and heads back home, which makes bakugou realize “wait dammit i didn’t actually hate having company around wait dammit that was nice” so he heads over to heights alliance (which is just the name of the todoroki place lol) pretty soon after kirishima leaves (which is like around the time the girls wrap up their visit at heights alliance) to visit kaminari

HOWEVER, kaminari’s busy doing some kaminari stuff y’know (probably riding out to catch kyouka so he can apologize to her or smth), so bakugou crashes in the parlor, and then todoroki wanders in with a letter from momo. he’s being super dorky, reading it and stuff bc they’re cute y’know, and then bakugou’s like “wtf is wrong with you? you realize that as an orphan from a rich family with no inheritance she’s obviously just pretending to be into you for your fortune” which gives todoroki an EXISTENTIAL CRISIS WHERE HE REALIZES “OH NO THESE ARE FEELINGS BUT WHAT IF BAKUGOU IS RIGHT”

BAKUGOU IS HIGHKEY A PROBLEM-CAUSING ASSHOLE IN THIS AU BUT HE GETS BETTER I SWEAR

so todoroki immediately excuses himself to send a panicked letter to momo saying “sorry i’m going back home goodbye” so that he can have some time alone with his feelings (and his best friend *eyebrows thing*) as kaminari comes back in. 

kaminari listens to bakugou’s ranting and is just like, “hey, you’re like... actually just being a shitty person. there is no other way to put it; you’re just a shitty person” which kind of blows bakugou’s mind, but kaminari points out that the fact that him even coming to ask abt it shows that he’s starting to figure stuff out and is beginning to become more emotionally intelligent, which is good

meanwhile, back at the farm (bc otherwise this would just become “the boys deal with regency era romantic drama”), midnight, the local matchmaker, comes in with a marriage proposal for kyouka from a mysterious young man the town over. kyouka rejects it, the proposal goes over momo bc everyone knows she’s courting todoroki, mina rejects it on account of wanting to get married for love, and so it falls at last to ochako, who accepts

so now the girls are all being pretty merry, preparing to send ochako away to get married, and things are good. ochako moves out, promising to write them all letters and stuff, and the house is quiet for a little while with just momo, kyouka, and mina. 

but then kirishima comes back all weird, and all the girls try to work their girl magic on him, but it’s not really working. it kind of just ends on “i guess bakugou just wasn’t the best match for him” and they all try to move on. 

and then todoroki moves back to his hometown with kaminari in tow with little more than the short breakup letter of goodbye

now obvs, momo receives said letter and is absolutely devastated. and now all the girls have to work their girl magic on both of them, and luckily, ochako soon sends an invitation for them to all visit her and her new husband

aizawa agrees bc he has business with all might in the area, so it’s family trip time woohoo!!

Anyway, it all turns out that the izch marriage was arranged on their behalves by all might n midnight (bc all might needed an heir bc he had none of his own, so he picked deku, but due to the times he was in want of a wife blah blah blah), and the day they met was actually around their wedding day. They luckily hit it off splendidly and are happy with their marriage. 

Anyway, gasp of fucking shock, todoroki ends up at the dinner party thing they’re all at with kaminari as his plus one but what’s important is that todoroki is there and ochako, kyouka, and mina see him first and do everything within their power to keep him away from momo whilst also getting the scoop on why the fuck he left. 

Unfortunately, ochako is tasked with keeping momo busy, since she’s the wife of the son-thing of the host, and mina is the most vicious interrogator when it comes to love, which leaves kyouka with the job of keeping kaminari distracted long enough that mina can grill todoroki alone. It’s terrible and kyouka hates it but kaminari asks her to dance and by god she has to fucking take it. It’s for the sake of yaomomo. 

However, ochako unfortunately can’t keep momo away from the ballroom, so there’s a bit of a change in the plans which mostly involve kyouka making kaminari continue to dance with her in an effort to keep momo’s attention away from the very attention-grabbing todoroki and mina. As they dance, she learns that kaminari has no idea why todoroki suddenly decided to move away, which kyouka finds strange until kaminari explains that todoroki doesn’t usually talk about his feelings, at least not with kaminari, no matter how hard the latter tries to get him to open up. He explains that usually it was deku whom he would talk about his feelings, and suddenly, ochako is the most important player in this puzzle game, but she’s stuck dragging momo around to wherever todoroki isn’t! However, just as the dance ends and the floor clears between rounds, tdmm run into one another despite mina n ochako’s best efforts, and for the team, it’s like time stopped. 

Tdmm just stares at one another, agape, but then suddenly momo runs off, and todoroki tries to follow her, but mina’s just like “oh no you don’t you haven’t answered anything” Kyouka thanks kaminari for the information (but not the dance) and runs after ochako, who was running after momo, and kyouka relays everything kaminari just told her, and now it’s up to ochako to run an investigation. Kyouka then goes on to find momo in the garden, staring into space bc she was just so shocked, and kyouka just hugs her and they stay there together in silent understanding until the party is over and aizawa comes to fetch them. 

The next morning, they all return home and in the mail they find… *fanfare* a letter addressed to kirishima! It’s from bakugou, who says that he was told recently that he was a shitty person, and now he wanted to apologize for the way he treated kiri. He said that if kiri wanted, he was welcome to come back, and they could have adventures together or something, but he understood if kiri didn’t want to do that. The girls are all just straight-up flabbergasted at the change of heart compared to what they decided he was like from kiri’s stories, but it’s ultimately kirishima’s decision. 

They all urge him to really think carefully about it, warning him that it might be him missing someone to pick on or whatever (bc you have to be really careful in a situation like this; this is pretty toxic behavior), and kiri is actually a little scared, but he mentally calls upon an advice session he had with aizawa between the time he opened up to mina and the other girls where aizawa’s two cents were that kiri’s heart was in a good place, and he didn’t really do anything wrong, it was just that bakugou wasn’t in the right place for anything to be able to do him good, especially from such a person as recently known as kiri. Kiri decides that this is a sign that bakugou is prime real estate for becoming a better person, and he wants to see that happen, partly for bakugou’s sake, but also for his own because he wants to believe that he was right and bakugou could be a good person and that he hadn’t been wrong for trying. 

So as they bid kirishima goodbye, ochako does some digging via deku, who says that he actually hadn’t asked about his reasons yet because he didn’t think todoroki was ready for it yet. 

So then deku does, learns the info, relays it back to ochako, who tells the girls in a letter that arrives a little while after kiri is gone and they all collectively lose their shit again because WHAT THE FUCK IT WAS BAKUGOU ALL ALONG??? 

Kyouka, who had been friends with him, is kind of betrayed because why would he break up tdmm??? And now she vows revenge or something and asks aizawa permission to follow kirishima to keep him from visiting bakugou and then beat up todoroki for being such a gullible piece of shit. Aizawa poses the usual conditions of having another girl go with her, and this time it’s mina that goes along bc she had been closest to kiri and also wouldn’t get in the way of kyouka’s beatdown of todoroki. 

Meanwhile, the gossip spreads like wildfire, and kaminari finally learns todoroki’s reasons for having them pack up and leave basically overnight. He’s like “what the fuck”, REALIZES WHAT HAPPENED (bc bakugou basically never visits the house, and he couldn’t have gotten into the parlor if todoroki hadn’t let him in, so that means the day he went to say goodbye to kyouka BAKUGOU had said shit to todoroki, which started this whole mess BEFORE he was able to make bakugou realize he was being a piece of shit), and subsequently realizes that he HAS TO FIX THIS!!! 

Kyouka and mina split up on the road, with kyouka riding out to bakugou’s place and mina to the todoroki estate (mina objects to not being the one to go to baku’s place to catch kiri but kyo is like 1. My horse is faster and 2. You’re too close to kiri and you’ll be too soft and too much of a hopeless romantic to really tell him the hard truth he needs to here plus 3. That way she can still get more info out of todoroki and give him a good verbal lashing before kyouka joins in), and kaminari manages to catch mina just before he leaves. 

He asks her why she’s here, and she explains everything about bakugou’s letter and kirishima and then ochako’s letter and todoroki and now she’s here to wring out every last detail from todoroki before kyouka comes later to kick his fucking ass. Kaminari explains the whole misunderstanding and then mina is just like “oh my god” and now has to ride out after kyouka, just barely managing to catch her outside the gate to bakugou’s place. 

They have a bit of a shouting match there where kyouka is still blinded by rage, but mina just shouts louder and explains everything (omitting the part with kaminari, thinking that kyouka would believe her less if she knew bc mina didn’t know about the dance bc ochako does this thing where she doesn’t mention dates or sources all the time, and mina just straight up went “i call interrogating todoroki” and ran off as soon as the problem fell on their laps) and then bakugou walks out and starts shouting about the fucking racket and what did they want and at first kyouka takes this as proof that nothing changed until kiri enters the scene and CALMLY explains everything. No one wants to listen to a shouting person jfc. 

Anyway, with that misunderstanding out of the way, the sisters head over to the todoroki place (but not after kyouka flips off bakugou and he apologizes for accidentally breaking up tdmm jfc) so that they can tell him the truth about momo’s feelings and shit. He asks if she’d be willing to see him again, to which they sigh and say he’d have to come visit for himself. 

On the way out, kyouka and kaminari briefly meet while mina waits outside, having charged ahead, and there’s a moment of silence, which is good bc that is the absence of bickering. 

The girls head home, a job well done, and life returns to a rather boring normal after living in a soap opera for so long. 

Meanwhile, kaminari learns the scoop straight from the horse’s mouth (todoroki), and after talking about it with deku and maybe kaminari, todoroki decides to visit the girls to see momo for himself, apologize for his behavior and his weakness, and asks if she wanted to be with him again, this time forever. Ofc this is a private moment, but the girls are listening at the keyhole anyway and cheer when she says yes. 

Their lives become busy again as they begin preparing for the wedding, but not the same kind of busy as before with all the drama. Ochako returns home to help out and hears kyouka’s explanation of what happened. She learned from deku n todoroki a while back kaminari had been the one who fixed everything up, surprising kyouka, which surprises ochako bc she assumed mina would have told her. 

Kyouka now has this to sit on, but she doesn’t have much time to think about it bc hey look now kirishima’s back to help with the wedding preparations, and he’s just as vivid as he had been before his first stay with bakugou, and he mentions how much he admires katsuki’s self-discipline and dedication to becoming a better person and that he might actually move in with katsuki after momo gets married bc at some point, being there just felt like home. 

Then the wedding happens and guess who kyouka sees as the dancing begins? Hell yeah it’s kaminari fucking denki. She realizes that she had never been able to thank him, so she approaches him to do so. He laughs it off and says it was nothing, but if she wanted to call it even, she could dance with him. Kyouka realizes that she finds the way he asked this time to be very charming, and accepts with no reluctance whatsoever. 

As they dance, kaminari admits that his feelings for her never changed despite her rejection, but he didn’t plan on asking her to marry him again. Kyouka hesitates. The atmosphere and time is right, and she’d recently come to realize that she could have feelings for him too, and so she very shyly says she wouldn’t mind courting him at the very least. 

And so, todoroki grants kaminari permission to live in heights alliance as he’s courting kyouka, mina meets sero at some point, and they all live happily ever after and have an epilogue at the kamijirou wedding where mic comments on them being empty nesters soon and aizawa is just like “doesn’t matter to me” (but secretly he’s going to miss all his kids lol).

.

.

anyway, that’s basically the idea for the pride and prejudice au. it would probably be a very delicate story to write because of all the things happening at once as well as attempting to write a bakugou redemption arc in it too, which would obvs take some great care to get right

but oh my god would it not only be the slowest of slow burns, but it would be super freaking epic to read and have written

[lizzybeth1986]

Quick Thoughts on TRR Book 1 Chapter 8

• So…umm…I LOVE this chapter! More in hindsight than when I was actually playing it because back then it just sounded like a jealous woman trying to sabotage the MC and failing. But now having played through this chapter and even written a fic about it…I have to say there’s a lot going on in this one.

• I’ve often found the 8th chapter in the series pretty interesting. This was the first chapter in the series to feature diamond scenes from all three of the original LIs in a single chapter. This would happen again in Book 2, but by Book 2 the imbalance was a lot more tangible. I will speak more about this later…but suffice to say that back when we had just two books in the series, I would call the 8th chapter The Magical Number Eight.

• A common misconception that seems to stem from this chapter (and others, often by Kiara-haters) is that Kiara “agrees to be our friend” this chapter, and then jumps ship to Madeleine in Book 2. That’s bullshit. Kiara never mentions the word friend. She says ally. And she delivers.

• THIS is also where you get the first little inkling that Maxwell could be romanced, though we would only know for sure by the middle of Book 2. This chapter is also where you also get the first of many Drake’s plot related scenes. Which meant that sometimes, even if a fan did not like him, they would end up buying his scenes anyway for some crumb of information on their LI. Drake was already getting popular, but dropping hints of plot into his scenes gave him an added edge and often encouraged fans of other LIs who didn’t like him, to buy his scenes.

• Anyway, since the buildup took an entire chapter, the book pushes us straight into the dressing room for this one!

• Title: A Waltz to Remember.

Alternative Title: Lizzy Turns This QT into a Kiara Gush-fest And Does Not Regret It (Even If It Gave Her Hand-Cramps).

I love how over the course of three books, this particular dance form of Cordonia has gained the importance it has. And it’s lovely how - even though we’re not meant to like Olivia at this point - our first glimpse of Cordonian culture through this dance, is in her estate.

• Hana’s silver dress makes its debut here! Honestly, I kinda would’ve liked this one a LOT better as a gown than as the bodycon it eventually became. That pleated bodice really needed a long, flowy skirt to work. I’m always going to be a little sore they made it a short bodycon instead 😑

• Okay I love both our options for the ball, okay. They’re both big, and glamorous, and make a real statement. Which is necessary, because the plan is to show Olivia up at her own home.

Winter Goddess is gorgeous - it has that vintage Hollywood feel to me, and the caption for it sounds pretty romantic (“will capture the winter moonlight”). Snowflake Sweetheart is very on-point for the whole snow/ice theme Lythikos itself has going on. I’m very fond of the crystals and the illusion sleeves on the second one….but I have to say that silk-satin one with the fur stole is the winner for me 😅

Me Back Then (on one of my million replays): If I really have to take a diamond option, I’m taking the second one. I’m cheap.

Me Now: Still cheap. I’m not spending 25 whole diamonds on another gown when there’s already a cute one free in my closet.

• Maxwell is trying hard to channel Bertrand 2.0, and is badgered enough by 1.0 over the phone to almost succeed.

• One of the formal phrases he uses is “a diamond of the first water”, a phrase you’d see very commonly in the Regency era…which kind of solidifies my belief that Regency England was one of their world building inspirations even back then.

• We don’t fully understand the kind of power the hostess can wield in her homeplace, until this sequence. On principle, Olivia is not exactly answerable to anyone, not even the royals visiting her in Lythikos - she can decide on seat arrangements, she can give instructions to the staff on who gets the best portions of the meals and who gets the worst, she can monopolize on the Prince’s time with her if she wants. And she takes full advantage of that.

• However, her being the hostess doesn’t always leave her completely free to do what she wants, without consequences. Lythikos is not just a turning point for us - it’s one for her as well. And not exactly in a good way.

• Here’s what Olivia does to sabotage us at the ball:

- seats us away from our sponsor, and away from the head table. In fact this is something she does to all the suitors - Maxwell tells us that not a single one has a place at the head table.

- seats us way back, next to a commoner who is also constantly given the same treatment - which Hana points out is meant to be viewed in the court as an insult. To an MC who is still learning the ways of the nobility, this move is pretty much a miss…but it does give us a very clear idea of how hypocritical the nobility and royalty can be. Hana is not immune to the prejudice either (seen as she does not censor the statement when she says it in front of Drake, a commoner), but she eventually grows to fiercely guard him and defend him from those kind of attitudes later on… and you can see a lot of that growth in TRH’s Walker Ranch chapters.

- has her servers give us ice-cold lobster bisque on purpose, thirty minutes after serving has begun. With no lobster in it. Remember, we’re in a wintry region where you require piping hot, creamy, fattening foods to stay warm. This isn’t just ruining a meal: Olivia is sending a clear message about how unwelcome they are, by giving them cold food devoid of the main protein, in the freezing cold of Lythikos.

- given the timing of her kiss on Liam during the waltz, she probably did that to send a message to us as well. It happens shortly after our dance with him, and from her reaction (angry, immediately establishing claim on him) to Liam’s dance with the MC, we can tell she’s more affected than she’d like to admit, and that’s what informs her actions during her second dance with him.

• Me Back Then: There is a nice option and a rude option. It’s Drake, but he’s Liam’s bff and I want to be nice.

(+ romance point)

Me Back Then:

Me Now: Romance points in Lythikos fall from Drake the way pee falls from someone with weak kegels. One tiny laugh and pssssshhhh.

• From the rude option you find out that Drake plays chess and often wins in his matches with Liam, so that’s a nice touch.

• The MC can acquire the fresh bisque for herself and her friends if she dramatically faints in front of a server. I quite like this (optional) moment because it shows her thinking on her feet and quickly ensuring she gets her way. The other options are pretty hilarious too, though, the obnoxious “do you know who I am” option comes with a Game of Thrones reference 😂

•

Me Back Then: …someone should leave Drake hungry at a party till the wee hours of the morning with access to only whiskey bottles. Whiskey for entrèe, whiskey for main, maybe we’ll be kind and give him brandy for dessert. Let’s see how far his love for whiskey goes then 😈

Me Now: Holy shit, Me Back Then, you just predicted the best scene in Book 3 🤣.

• One of my favourite TRR Tumblr posts ever, was the one where someone took a screenshot of Drake saying “I’m not one to complain about food” from this chapter, and placed a gif of Nicholas Fraser’s “Why You Always Lying” lyrics just beneath it 😄 If that isn’t the truth idk what is.

• Most of the chapter after this will focus on the Cordonian Waltz, Olivia’s little stunt and getting allies, so the buildup to Drake’s scene will happen now (and Hana’s just before we meet Drake). Hana will be dancing with Tariq, and then other partners in the meantime, so no opportunities to dance with her there.

I loved this dialogue option when I first saw it, but now that I know how much in love with dancing Maxwell is, this scene is ten times more fun! 😃

• On first playthrough…this didn’t seem like that big a problem. Maxwell was fun, and seemed to genuinely like us, and was berated a great deal by Bertrand - so it was easier then to perhaps forgive his gaffes and want to comfort him instead. But when you approach his character as someone who brought a complete foreigner to his country and then didn’t make much of an effort to educate her with what little time they both had…I wind up finding his character a lot less endearing. I’m honestly more irritated by his carelessness. There was a lot he could have done even if he forgot or didn’t know what to do. He could have asked around! Hana was right in front of him! He could have found out what to prepare for if he didn’t know or if Bertrand didn’t handhold him (which Bertrand himself isn’t exactly doing a good job of in the first place). The other LIs shouldn’t have to constantly step in and do his job as sponsor and guide!

• It’s only when we’re dancing that Maxwell realizes he’s not taught us the dance. Of course, if you bought Hana’s waltz scene, she whispers her advice just before you dance with him, and you give her credit for teaching you. If not, you go into it knowing very little (but because the options are easy to choose from, so you can still manage). Maxwell does explain its uniqueness in terms of the flirting potential and the fact that it’s a courtship dance…but the true beauty of that description only comes with Hana.

• Istg, if Hana weren’t around to repeatedly save our ungrateful asses…

• So THIS is the first opportunity you get to ‘romance’ Maxwell. He looks sad and tells you that you should only be here for the Prince, but it’s also that vague kind of sadness that you can interpret differently and write detailed fanfics about! I think a huge part of Maxwell’s appeal (besides the overall sparkling personality, and the fact that he was so different from both Liam and Drake) was the “will-he-won’t-he” nature of the LI question itself.

• We now move on to Liam, who is fighting a losing battle with his desire to favour the MC exclusively, but wants her to know that she is special to him. Notably he does say this in the “courtship” part of the dance.

• How do you know that the Cordonian Waltz was a strategic choice? Because Olivia chose to dance with Liam twice! And because she’s the hostess, it’s harder for Liam to refuse.

I remember being pretty uncomfortable with this scene the first time I saw it, I still am, and often I wonder if I’m the only one who feels that way. Whenever I see this scene being referenced, it’s often referenced in the most flippant ways. And it baffles me.

• Honestly, Olivia was clearly overstepping her boundaries here and didn’t even bother to ask Liam before doing it (Liam himself mentions he was “caught by surprise” and calls it an “unexpected advance”). Was Olivia doing it out of complex, understandable reasons? Like jealousy or frustration or showing the MC up? Well, sure I guess. But it doesn’t take away from the fact that her doing so was nonconsensual and downright wrong.

The funny thing is often this incident is either downplayed or erased completely, especially in contexts where people try to argue that Olivia “deserves better” than Liam, or sympathize with her for loving a man who “does not care about her”.

Does Olivia deserve to be loved back by a person she loves? Absolutely.

Is Liam a lesser person for not loving her back? No, and he shouldn’t have to be penalized or judged by a fandom for not doing so.

Is the fact that most people who uphold this “penalizing/blaming Liam for not returning Olivia’s feelings” argument, also tend to forget/downplay this particular incident…particularly disturbing? Well, yeah, definitely.

• Even the narrative fails with regard to this, actually. It is written in a comical style, with a couple of out-there dialogue options (like screaming loud enough of break poor Maxwell’s eardrums) and the MC is given a chance to lash out at Liam for not reacting fast enough or throwing Olivia off of him. And guess what his reaction is. Sad, contrite, trying to explain his position. It’s almost like it’s okay for him to feel guilty about something that was done TO him, that he was never asked permission for.

Olivia does suffer consequences, but more for her “power play” than for anything else. Her move isn’t viewed as negative for what it may do to Liam, it is negative because it is seen as a direct “fuck you” she is delivering to her competitors. The scene itself is written for laughs…which I’m surprised more people don’t find even a little uncomfortable.

• The reactions from the other suitors is pretty on point for their character types at this point. Madeleine is smug and condescending, confident that she will never be “unrefined or insecure” enough for such “ostentatious displays” (says the woman who will bully her entire court, run around Italy roaring drunk and name a drink after herself in Book 2). Penelope doesn’t exactly have a personality at this point, she merely comments that the kiss was a bold play. It is Kiara who points out the power dynamics involved and views it as the last straw in her waning support for Olivia.

Remember - the ladies of the court weren’t treated half as badly as we were, but they were probably more aware (than us) that they were being denied a seat at the head table, and had to put up with Olivia monopolizing Prince Liam’s time. While Kiara’s suspicions that Olivia is “mad with power” here probably aren’t too far off the mark (even though her feelings of jealousy and confusion may be involved, we can’t deny that there is a clear sense of “I’m the hostess here, I can do what I want”), it’s not just an assumption that simply stems out of nowhere.

• Maxwell sees and opportunity to gain allies, and encourages us to capitalize on it. The wrong options are pretty interesting: if you mention “slapping the smirk off Olivia’s face”, Maxwell tells you that the political equivalent would be to “attack her alliances”. If you suggest making out with Liam in public, Maxwell exclaims that doing so would lead to people gunning after you. Which is telling, because in Book 1 PDA is mostly shown as being frowned upon in Cordonian society in general. So Olivia’s very public kiss isn’t just brazen and bold to the courtly ladies, but also viewed as inappropriate and a jab at their own lack of power in this situation.

• I love that Maxwell gets the opportunity to encourage us to play politics. Love it. He is the first one to notice the change in Kiara’s attitude towards Olivia, and he recognizes that the time is ripe for us to captialize on it. While Bertrand, or Bertrand-and-Maxwell, are the ones who tell us the importance of gaining support from the press and the royals, getting the court to support us is wholly Maxwell’s idea. This added another layer to the way he was built in the story, and I’m not happy that we didn’t see a lot of that perceptiveness and skill around court later on. By Books 2 and 3, he was mostly relegated to the funny guy, the court jester. Book 1 Maxwell may make a lot of mistakes but you bet he’d be too smart to toss brushettas in the face of dignitaries at the UN. It was like his own writers forgot Maxwell was capable of more.

• OKAY SO THE KIARA SECTION IS A FAVOURITE OF MINE OKAY. And it only wound up being a favourite when I realized there were changes in her dialogue between my Esther playthrough and my Persephone one. I mean if I weren’t already a fan of her…this definitely would have converted me.

Before I get into the actual gushing…I’ll just summarize what the MC has to do to gain her approval:

- Language: Kiara is known for her proficiency with languages - it is the skill that defines her in court (to the point that you barely notice her other qualities). Her home language is French, and if you know how to respond to comment ça va she is cheerful and more willing to hear you out (if you choose the fromage answer she’ll a bit surprised but not too hostile, and if you say voulez-vous coucher avec moi, well…of course she’ll be pissed off because you just accidentally asked her to sleep with you). In any case, to gain her approval you need to respond in French.

In fact even Kiara’s goodbyes vary based on whether she becomes your ally or not. If she’s your ally, she says à bientôt before leaving (which is “see you soon”). If she’s not convinced by your arguments, she says adieu, which has more of a sense of finality to it and is often said when you don’t expect to meet again (in fact I’m surprised they had her say it) and is different from au revior (which means “until we see each other again”).

- Olivia’s Actions: Kiara reiterates to you what she’d just told the others - Olivia is on a power trip, and while Kiki is well aware that she’s not a top contender in this competition, she is not going to stand for being treated like she is lesser than the ones who do have power. Interestingly, in both Chapter 7 of Book 2 and this chapter, Kiara’s first visible signs of discontent/frustration come when both Olivia/Madeleine go on massive power trips (“she even named a drink after herself. Quelle narcissique”, Kiara says about Madeleine in the next book).

I feel like Kiara’s frustration may have already been there with Olivia’s treatment of the ladies of the court at the start of the Ball (but perhaps she may have been brushed it aside as a strategy you could expect from a noblewoman in her own estate) but it is Olivia kissing Liam and trying to establish a claim on him that is seen as the tipping point for her.

However, she’s also pretty pragmatic and is lowkey impressed with Olivia if you state that she went too far. She is irritated by the message Olivia is sending, but acknowledges that not many would have dared to do that in her place. A more neutral response works well with Kiara’s train of thought, because to her the important thing is seeing what works in the long run, and the MC has to convince her that she is a good alternative.

- Alliance: Kiara already anticipates this, since she is the one who straight-out asks this question. At this point Kiara is not exactly aiming to be Queen - she knows she is up against more powerful people, people who have more access to the royal family (perhaps her dad Hakim would have had a similar amount of access if Constantine wasn’t such a dick). She is not going to waste her time wishing for what she won’t get, when she can easily network instead. The answer that works best with her is the one where the MC speaks of Olivia’s friendship as being a one-way street where she always gets her way, which is ironic considering how the MC behaves in a likely worse manner towards Kiara in Book 3.

• One of my favourite Kiara lines is from the wrong option (“I’m nicer than Olivia”) for the Alliance segment: “Nice? Nothing about being here is nice. If I wanted nice I’d buy a teacup pig. 😡”

• Back in Books 6’s QT, I mentioned Queen Regina and Duke Bertrand as being the two people in the first book who watch out and keep track on our progress. Bertrand does it because he is our sponsor, Regina does it because after all we are one of the candidates for her stepson’s hand in marriage, and we’re the one he eventually shows the most interest in. But there is one other person who seems to be taking notice of our good performance as well:

On my fail run, where Persy doesn’t gain approval either from the press, or from the royals, those last two lines simply do not appear. She asks us about whether we’re looking for an alliance, and we immediately answer her. She will still join hands with you if you convince her (I did a test run where Persy said all the right things) but those words will not feature anywhere. Because the dialogue is coded such that it will only appear if you’ve done well in your previous two tasks.

That is fascinating to me, because Kiara is the only lady of the court who is written as noticing these things at such an early stage in the competition (the Lythikos Ball is only the third event in the social season, and the maximum approvals come from the Derby, which was the event just preceding it). She is the only person, besides Bertrand and Regina, who keeps track of our progress (even if that is only uptil this point, because if you win her support here, it stays that way until the Coronation). Even Madeleine, who has been part of a social season before and is viewed as having a lot of experience in the court, compared to the other ladies, spends most of her time simply underestimating the MC. It isn’t until Applewood and Ramsford that Madeleine even begins to think there might be more to this person.

Kiara, on the other hand, is observant. She is competitive but she knows when other people have the upper hand, and she will honestly acknowledge that you have an edge if you have proven yourself to the press and the Queen. For someone who would be seen as just a lady of the court….that level of foresight, observation skills and pragmatism is pretty phenomenal to me.

• I’ve said this many times and I will say it again: Kiara has always been upfront about what she’s bringing to the table in an alliance. She isn’t your friend and she won’t pretend to be your friend either. She mentions she will put in a good word and support you in becoming Queen, and she keeps her promise.

She keeps her distance from you otherwise, so you can’t dub her a ‘friend’ even then, but she will do her work as an ally. She doesn’t get involved in smearing your name while supporting you to your face. At the end of the day, she is a woman in the court trying to thrive and carve a space of her own, but she won’t dirty her hands to do that - and I don’t think she gets enough recognition for that.

• Alright I’ll stop gushing about Kiki otherwise this QT will never end 😂

• We now meet Liam, who tells us about the hot tub in his room, and invites us there. The intent is clearly romantic (the MC specifies as such, smiling, and Liam winks at you before he leaves).

• This chapter also marks the second time you see Penelope with Liam, after which you will only see her directly interact with him at his Coronation. Funny how Kiara doesn’t get even one opportunity in the narrative to talk to him.

• It’s the end of our big night in Lythikos, and we’ve got three invitations to spend time with an LI! Liam’s setting up candles near the hot tub, Hana is playing exquisite melodies on the piano, and Drake is drinking whiskey in Olivia’s wine cellar. Maxwell is…doing Maxwell things that we are not privy to yet. Or taking a nap.

• I won’t be going too much into detail esp for Liam and Hana’s scenes - because I have essays written on both! Both will be under the “Liam: Diamond Scenes” and “Hana: Diamond Scenes” sections of my essay masterlist if anyone is interested 😃 They will be titled “Hot Tub at Lythikos” and “Piano at the Parlour”, respectively. (another recommended read is “Exploring Hana in Her Context” where I talk about this scene, and her characterization. It’s a little further down on the masterlist).

•

(Screenshots for Drake from the HIMEME YouTube channel)

Liam: This is undoubtedly meant to be a romantic scene, and is hinted as much in the lead-up to it while still giving the MC the space to not go (since she says “I won’t make any promises”). He puts candles around the tub, and the tub itself is situated in an area where you can get a wonderful view of the mountains.

This scene is divided into two parts: the first where Liam gets to sincerely tell the MC he trusts her (optionally) and where they lightly flirt, and the second where he admits to feeling conflicted between giving in to his feelings and being fair to the other women. At this point he knows his feelings for the MC are stronger, implicitly trusts her (“I thoroughly believe that if you thought I was a pompous ass, you wouldn’t hesitate to tell me. I trust you, MC. Anything you say”), doesn’t want to call it love just yet but is well on his way to doing so. He tells us about his brother Leo, hinting at the events of the RoE series and explaining that seeing how love affected him made Liam think more about it. It’s not one of Liam’s absolute best scenes…but it is a sweet one where Liam tentatively explores his growing love for her - in some ways leading to his “almost-declaration” of love at the Forgotten Falls. In each scene of Liam’s, he takes a step further, and another, and another, to admitting his love for her and growing less guilty about his desire to be with her. He is still torn between his duty and his desire at this point, but you can already see him slowly inching towards the prospect of keeping what he wants first, for once.

Hana: This, in my mind, is Hana’s most powerful scene. As many adjectives as I can use to describe her in this scene would be inadequate, because it’s that good, that layered, that rich with nuance and detail. But I do think I can sum a bit of it up with a quote from a Book 3 Liam scene that instantly took me back to this one:

“Hana’s a tough one. She’s clearly had the kind of lessons I’m giving you now, and then some. Her posture is almost always polite and attentive…but when she feels strongly about something, you can sense her real feelings even before she speaks up. Her eyes grow darker and more serious.”

Compare the scenes from last chapter where she speaks about ice-skating, or even waltzing, to this one. In both those scenes, her expression is mostly neutral (or joyful when she is imparting her knowledge), speaking of it in a way that makes you understand that her heart isn’t truly in doing those things. But in this one, she is lost in her music when she plays it, she is feeling its melody in her bones, she speaks of guarding her most precious skill fiercely against her parents’ control because it’s the one thing she wants for herself. She is fierce and passionate and absolutely beautiful in the way she expresses her love for music.

In an essay I did on exploring Hana’s character in her larger context, I spoke at length about how this scene is important because it highlights that her struggle for her own autonomy began at a very young age - she recognized her art as sacred to her and had the foresight to understand that parading it around the way her parents wanted her to, would make her love it less. This scene is amazing because Young Hana is described as pushing back in the only way she knew how, so she could keep what was hers, on her terms.

The other thing this scene explores is her childhood loneliness and lack of friends, and how music helped her in those difficult times too. At this point we now know how deep that loneliness was, and how damaging to her, but back then this scene gave a wonderful insight to Childhood Hana.

So for her to trust us with her art - with the art she fought to keep her own…that’s a tremendous leap in that relationship - whether the MC is a friend or a potential lover. Romantically, she is at the point where she is slowly…slowly getting comfortable with the MC’s touch, allowing it to linger before she pulls away from her. She’s a bit like a butterfly who doesn’t know yet if she’s ready to leave her cocoon.

Drake: The picture presented to us of Drake here is the diamond-in-the-rough, the underdog, the one who views court and palace differently from everyone around him. He is there to remind us that this is not the charmed place we think it is, that even friends can stick knives in our backs. He speaks of the forced politeness of the nobility, the fact that he’s here only to protect Liam, that the MC is an innocent woman who doesn’t know what she is getting into and needs protection as well.

This scene comes with what was regarded as an important plot point at the time: who almost sold pictures of Liam’s bachelor party to the press? Drake and Bastien managed to get hold of them and prevent them from being published, knowing that having those printed before the social season would cast Liam in a more negative light, and make things harder for him. At this point, Drake is sure that someone he knows and possibly considers a friend is involved (close enough, but not quite there yet), but can’t yet figure out who (because, yknow, Olivia was the brains between the two, she cracked that mystery in under five minutes or something).

If you don’t buy this scene, you only get to know about the pictures in Book 2 Chapter 4. A lot of Drake’s scenes involve important plot points - some of which we won’t even hear the same way - or at all - if we don’t buy the scene (eg. the flashback scenes about Hana’s return and the Italian restaurant scene about Liam’s assassination). I recall buying quite a few of his scenes in the latter half of Book 1 and most of Book 2 just to find out stuff about other LIs.

The scene is pretty sweet - it highlights his now-famous whiskey obsession, has Drake openly show his protectiveness towards her minus the jaded sarcastic veneer, and has him warn her about the nature of this court. It has a line that I quite liked when I first saw the scene, but that fandom has pretty much ruined for me - “the moments in between”. Where he speaks of how the nobility are so busy schmoozing and being superficial that they miss the really important parts. It’s a beautiful thought, but the fact is I’m still paying like 17 diamonds to get it, which makes it a…pretty expensive moment.

But overall…it’s a nice scene. The look and feel of it is different from the other two, and so is the purpose.

• The focus of all these three scenes is clearly trust.

Liam completely trusts her opinion of him and confesses openly his desire to let go of all that is holding him back, even though he is still confused and conflicted about his own feelings.

Hana trusts her so much, that she will share piano pieces that she lovingly composed to the MC, even though she never performs for people. It is a measure of how much Hana values the MC that she will share such a secret part of herself with her.

Drake, who once came this close to calling the MC a crown chaser, now views the same woman as an innocent who doesn’t know what she is getting into. He will later tell her that that aspect of her journey reminds him of Savannah. He trusts the MC enough to give her important information about something he still views as a possible plot targeted at Liam, and tells her their moments mean something to him.

Chapter 8 of the second book took this theme forward for the initial three LIs, by showing us trust in other forms. Liam’s firm belief in his father’s dedication to his nation (which will crumble soon). Drake’s being convinced by the MC to stay on and hear out his sister, to give her a chance to explain what really happened to her, and his emotional reunion with her. Hana’s scene…was more about gaining someone’s trust - particularly Penelope’s. (it is also one of the worst scenes the series has ever given an LI, whoever wrote that one can fall on a cactus).

We are approaching a midpoint in the story, so at this point the narrative is progressing each of these relationships towards the point where they trust this woman, view her as a valuable person in their lives, and inch ever-so-slightly towards that eventual realization that they are in love with her.

•

Another point in the Tariq shoe tally!! I wonder if this ‘ghost’ deals with 'future misdeeds’ as well…

• We spend a few more days in Lythikos before we move back to the Capitol for the Royal Regatta, and both Esther and Persy are like “YOU HAD A FEW DAYS TO ASK IF I KNEW WHAT A FUCKING REGATTA WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MAXWELL”.

• So…a lot happens this chapter. The MC begins to rope in (or not) her first allies in the court, she has a strong foothold by now and is beginning to get noticed as more than just a random contender who wouldn’t last, she gains the trust of the people she is growing close to.

But most of all…Lythikos is where Olivia begins to lose the hold she once had on the court, and this is never more apparent than if you are losing supporters rather than gaining them (if you are more popular, it won’t be that apparent, since you will move far ahead of the competition). There will be times when the press may not pay attention to her, there will be ladies who club the MC and Olivia both together as “not a proper fit for becoming a queen”. She is still very much a frontrunner, she may win the Regatta if you fail all the steps to the boat race, but after this it will be harder for her to gain support whether or not the MC succeeds.

Shortly after this point, Olivia also doesn’t antagonize the MC as blatantly as she did in Lythikos, save for a snide remark to the MC (with a life jacket of all things) if you choose to go to her yacht in the next chapter. She will eventually begin to thaw towards you in Applewood.

• Constantine and Regina are conspicuous by their absence this chapter, and Constantine announces that he is stepping down the next. Which probably means he found out sometime between the Masque and this event that he was ill (since we don’t see him at the Derby). I’m headcanoning that they visited Leo around this time (optionally with the RoE MC, since the housewarming party in Newlyweds seems to happen sometime around the social season (it could be earlier or later too…but humour me 😂)

• So…Regatta in Chapter 9! Lots of sun, fun and (Persephone-willing) PLENTY of mess.

• Before I sign of, here is Persy’s Share of Mess this chapter (except for the bloodcurdling scream she gives when Olivia kisses Liam, I forgot to screenshot that 🙈 How on earth did Maxwell’s poor ears survive??):

• Until next week, folks!

–

• Tally Counts:

Number of Times Drake has Called Esther/Persy by Their First Names: 5

Number of Times Tariq Has Mentioned His Shoes: 3

Number of Times Drake Has Taken An Alcoholic Drink that’s Not Whiskey: 1

Number of Times Someone Has Called A Reigning Monarch 'Your Highness’: 2

Number of Times You Can Leave Hana Shook. SHOOK I TELLS YA: 4

Number of Times We See Penelope’s Angryface: 2

–

[spideyjlaw]

My Avengers Endgame World Premiere experience

this is really long, lota rambling feel free to read skim anything idc, no spoilers bc this was on Monday before I saw the movie :) 

Ok Ima start Saturday night, this is when I was packing making and painting my posters that said “Thank You Avengers”, I live in California so I didn’t have to fly to this event. At 12am we (my family) we arrive in Los Angeles around 5am. At this time I thought that the premiere was going to be at El Capitan Theatre where it was originally supposed to be. We drive by the theater and we see no one is in line which was weird bc normally there would be people here already so i search and find the location which was switched last min (smh) the drive to the next location wasnt too long but at least i knew i was at the right location bc of the small group of fans and the giant poster that said Avengers Endgame World Premiere. Apparently they changed the location bc they needed a larger screening room and they didnt want tons of fans showing up, there were these girls that were waiting at the El Capitan for 2 hours before they realized something was up. Anyway, we get in line. People who were in charge told the people who stayed over night to go home bc there wasnt going to be a fan area. No one left ofc who would hell no. Then some people went on twitter to talk about it made signs it was confusing but we ended up in a fan area after going through security. We got into the fan area at 12 ish and we had to stand there for another 4 and a half hours before anything exciting happens. Now its around 4pm people are starting to arrive. (THIS IS WHEN THE ACTION STARTS) Benedict Wong then Joe Russo. Not many came all the way down the line, I was the last one on the line before it wrapped around the corner. But I did want to get barricade and able to see action so Im grateful for my spot. Then Anthony Mackie arrives he’s walking to end of the fan area around the small corner but as hes walking right as he gets near me i scream at the top of my lungs, he stops right in front of me and i go “AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!ANTHONYYYYY MACKiE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!” he looks at me biggest smile. We had a whole moment together its hard to explain its kinda like a ‘you had to be there moment’ i was the longest person probably a good 20 seconds (which is a long ass time in these times when they are in a rush) he was at and while im screaming and fangirling he air grabs my head to fucking sign my forehead i closed my eyes and accepted it he didnt do it ofc but he was just a fun guy i love him soooo much he signs my posters while saying “There’s no black guy on here” (i did an original 6 themed avengers poster) but he signed than signed my bosslogic poster which he was in. paul rudd comes by hes just a rocking dude i love scott lang sm, he was so sweets v cool guys sm love for him. Then at around 5pm Chris freaking Hemsworth arrives I loose my shit and so does everyone else. Just like Joe, Benedict Wong & Anthony he also went around the corner to make sure they got all of the fans (thank u to all who did this). Ive loved Hemsie for the longest time, i did get teary eyed but i didnt cry (yet) he was just the sweetest I was able to take a crappy photo with him bc i wasnt able to function properly as i took the pic my dumbass was like “iLOvEyoUsOmUCh” its oka cause he has the cutest smile and the bluest eyes oh and i cant stress enough he smelled so good sooooo good normally i hate when guys coat themselves in cologne cause it smells bad, but his didnt, his smelled so good i was so shook like chris drop what cologne u used idc its for guys mama neeeddds. THEN IT hAPPENEd CHRISTOPHER ROBERT EVANS DRIVES BY. Everyone was like “omg is that chris evans?!”  I stand on the barricade to see if i can catch a peak, istg the moment the fucking moment he gets out the car i start to bawl my eyes out. This man who has meant more to me than anyone is over there i couldnt believe i was seeing my favorite human ever. I’ve only sobbed right as i saw my fave once before back in 2016 at the Passengers premiere when I met Jennifer Lawrence. People dont really understand the moment like this person has inspired me so much of course im going to cry and sure judge me for it but they helped me through so much. Anyway he looked soo hot in his blue suit and sunglasses. I kinda calm down bc i didnt know if he was going to come all the way down the line and yk my ass wanted a pic but he was cut half way though the people which was upsetting but again im extremely grateful to be able to see him. Then my main fucking man. Sebastian Stan arrives. see ive met the guy before last year at ace comic con (there was tea w my photo op being really messy and i hated it i got a refund u can read about that on my ace comic con post). anyway i see him. i dont cry im trying to wipe my tears i was more prepared cause ive seen him before it was gonna be ok. I lose my shit the man was wearing a baby blue pastel colored suit. fucking beautiful. iconic. very hot of you mr seb ty. hes walking down and hes getting close. he wasnt to smiley, he was taking pics but he was focused on the fans signing for as many fans as possible. He gets to me and he sees our pics then he looks u so we could take a pic and his smile just transforms you can just see his face just glow up it was the truly the cutest this ive ever experience. then we look up from the pic and hes smiling at me i tell him “I love you so much” i hear him chuckle but as he says something his security guy yells “thank you that enough” so ill be posting the vid of us and any lip readers can help a girl out ill love you forever. I ended up being Sebs last person from the fan area. he truly made my day, week fucking year. then other celebs such as jon favreau, benedict cumberbatch comes by. Jeremy Renner comes by. I shoot my shot and make small talk w Jeremy. I go “Hi Jermey how’s your day going?” he goes “I’m doing really good, how bout you?” he signs my things i excitingly tell him “I’m doing great thank you” then he goes “Thank you honey” and smiles at me. It made me really happy, i could tell he was a bit tired but Jeremy is such a sweetheart he doesnt get the credit he deserves i love him sm, ive always has a little part of my heart for Hawkeye. minutes go by. I see Lizzie Olsen, Danai Gurira, beautiful ofc. then i see fucking Mark Ruffalo hes just standing behind one of the SUVs and the sun is on him. He looked like a confused puppy it was so cute and soft, i love my ruffalo buffalo. I took my moment to scream “iS THat MARK ruFFALO?” i dont think he signed for many fans. Scarjo arrives she doesnt sign for many either she looked beautiful v pretty. a little while passes than the most bitching car comes by and stops where the cars stop until the drop off area clears and they can go. we all knew who ever was in that car he was important. then it was his time to go cause the drop off area was cleared. guess who was in the drivers seat. You guessed right. Robert Downey Jr rolling up in an Audi E-TRON, with his wife Susan Downey in the passenger seat. Truly the Tony Stark entrance. he doesnt sign for many ofc. at this time it was getting later near 6pm almost all celebs and guests are inside where the actual premiere set up is. then Vin Diesel comes in. He was the most fan based guy. even though he was running late he ran (literally speed walking) through the whole line of fans around the corner and everything. he had the biggest smile on. wearing his groot jacket. and if u dont know fast and furious are one of my fave franchises of all time so i was having the best time. then that was the last person and we started heading out. i didnt name all who ive seen since there was just to many and i probably missed some things but i loved my experience. i was able to see all the original avengers irl and that made me really happy. this whole cast means the world to me. ill love them forever 

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Favorite Moments, Part IV

It's my BIRTHDAY! :D And much like the 13th was the perfect day to talk about the darkest moments I love in this series, I think today is the perfect day to talk about the brightest moments -- aka, my absolute favorite favorites. I don't think any of you are going to be surprised by this list:

1. Forgetting You, Chapter 9: Splatter Gets What He's Owed -- Victor punching Jack Splatter and rescuing Alice from the burning Mangled Mermaid -- Okay, first of all, I like this chapter in general because it was one of the first I did after getting some solid writing tips from reading the first book of the Riverworld series (namely, "I do not want to write like this"), and I feel it represents a big jump in quality in my storytelling. And this particular moment -- oh, it was satisfying to finally give Splatter exactly what he deserved for hitting Alice! (Which is, uh, kind of why I kept doing it. XD) Not to mention I threw myself into properly describing the burning Mermaid and Victor's rescue of Alice, and I feel it turned out beautifully. (I still like "If the exterior of the Mangled Mermaid was a glimpse at Pastor Galswells's favorite vision of Hell, the interior was the full Time-Of-Judgment-Featuring-Dante-And-Virgil experience.") Not to mention I liked letting Victor play the hero for Alice, as she was going to be playing the hero for him for much of the rest of the verse!

2. Forgetting You, Chapter 24: Confrontation At Moorgate Station -- Victor punching Bumby during the brief moment he broke free of his control -- Speaking of satisfying moments where someone gets what they deserve. . .ooh, this felt good to write after Chapter 22! Bumby obviously deserves worse, but that moment where it becomes clear he never truly broke Victor -- well, Alice wasn't the only one bouncing up and down in delight. XD

3. Forgetting You, Chapter 25: Into Londerland -- Alice shoving Bumby in front of the train -- Obviously I have to include what is also one of my favorite moments in Alice: Madness Returns itself. I was so worried that he was going to get away scott-free, and then Alice took matters into her own hands, and it was great. And I think I did a good job in translating the moment into text, particularly Bumby's shock as Alice turns to face him as her Wonderland self. (Which he definitely saw her as, thanks to my Alice having a natural talent for a certain disguise spell. . .) Not to mention the exchange right before she shoves him:

"Could you kill a fly?" echoed in her head, the Dollmaker trying to get in one last shot from beyond the grave.

I can kill a lot more than that, she replied, and used her free hand to give Bumby one good, hard shove.

Eeee~ So good.

4. Remembering You, Chapter 13: Taking Back The Crown -- Victor defeating the Bumby Heart within the Wall, and regaining his memories -- Again, more satisfying moments against Bumby -- or, at least the remnant of him still left in Victor's head. The whole fight against the Wall, with Victor wielding Alice's weapons against the Ruin, was great to write, but the final battle? Victor clawing his way back from the edge of oblivion thanks to remembering Alice's eyes? The memory of getting the fork from Ms. Plum becoming the initial form of the Vorpal Fork? Victor staring the Heart down as it starts panicking? The "MY! NAME! IS! VICTOR!" line right before he stabs it?! *chef's kiss* That was so good, both to write and to read afterward. :D And then afterward, designing the first form of his Otherland -- the sweet little forest where his memories come back? That was a great way to destress after the fight. Just what Victor and I needed.

5. Remembering You, Chapter 14: So Kiss Me – Victor and Alice's first kiss -- It's their first kiss I'm not supposed to pick this? XD More seriously, this was a sweet and wonderful moment to finally write. And it probably helps that I took some inspiration from one of my favorite Disney movies, Enchanted -- you know how Victor picks up Alice and spins her around a bit? I had in mind Giselle getting spun around by Prince Edward when they reunite in Robert's apartment. (Yeah, I know, wrong couple, but I still thought it was a cute moment!) After so much time spent with them either pining but shoving down their feelings, or being utterly oblivious, or being in love but struggling past lingering mental issues. . .damn, it just felt good to have them finally smooch.

6. Fixing You, Chapter 7: Heck Though Ain't It Grand – Alice's reunion with Lizzie in the Land of the Dead -- I know this was one of the two "big moments" everyone wanted to see in the series, and I was more than happy to deliver. Mostly because it was a moment I wanted to see myself. Setting up the surprise of Lizzie being Burtonsville, not in Oxford, was a lot of fun in-universe, and the actual moment when the two sisters saw each other again – even I "awwwed" internally when they flung themselves into each other's arms. :) It was just so heartfelt. . . The follow-up hug between Alice and her parents when they finally reach the Ball & Socket is great too. Just – I know this is the thing Alice has wanted most ever since the series began, and I was thrilled to give it to her. (And this leading to the final defeat of that damned Jabberwock was a great bonus! Call that an "honorable mention" on this list.)

7. Fixing You, Chapter 10: The Grand Wonderland Tour – Victor and Alice's tour of Wonderland – Yes, the entire chapter. This is the other big thing everyone wanted, and, again, more than happy to deliver. This whole chapter is probably my favorite in the whole series, just because I had so much fun coming up with stuff for Victor and Alice to do in all the various domains! It was like a "greatest hits" of every fun "Victor and Alice in Wonderland" scenario I've ever thought of! :D Personal favorites within the chapter itself are the mine cart ride in the Village of the Doomed (it was fun going back to AMA, coming up with a special suit and dress for the mains for the "domain," and it was very interesting to look up stuff on early roller coasters!), Victor and Alice building a sand castle in the Music Fish's "Choral Coral" spot (that's my personal favorite bit in the Deluded Depths when it comes to the scenery, and it brought back fond memories of being on the beach and watching Mom make sand sculptures), the battle against the Army Ants (more fun with AMA stuff, and a good opportunity to show the pair's battle skills – not to mention, I love the way they got the Ants to back off in the end), and Victor and Alice's race through Cardbridge (again, my favorite level in A:MR, and them just getting to play like kids in this beautiful world was -- I swear, I was smiling and squeeing so much writing that bit. . .). But the whole thing was fantastic, and I think well-worth the wait!

8. Fixing You Chapter 16: Round Three: The Conglomeration. . .and Thirteen – Victor redeeming Thirteen, and the full creation of his Otherland afterward -- I like the whole sequence in Silent Burtonsville (Victor going Hysteria to kill the Colossal Nell when she threatens Alice is definitely an “honorable mention” moment), but the final confrontation definitely makes favorite. Victor and Alice finally recognizing just what it is he's struggling with, and Alice convincing Victor that the only one who sees himself as a monster is him, leading to him forgiving himself. . .ooooof. It just hits you right in the feels, doesn't it? The moment of him hugging his corrupted self, whispering that he doesn't hate him? How could you not sniffle, seriously? And then, after Thirteen's redemption back into Desire, the whole bit where Victor starts getting into what he actually wants his Otherland to look like. . .once again, had so much fun doing the descriptions! I was as enthusiastic as Victor about the whole thing! And Victor's joy at seeing the Living Dead Forest come to life outside the window? So much squee, seriously. Love it.

9. Fixing You, Chapter 18: A Day For A Glorious Wedding – Victor and Alice's wedding – Again, this is their wedding, I wasn't supposed to pick it?! XD I'm pretty sure we were all VERY READY for this to finally go down by the time it happened, and I was just thrilled to finally put it to paper. I mean, I'd had Victor's reaction to Alice's dress stored away in a "notes" file for ages, but to actually get them in front of that registrar, do the vows, go back to Houndsditch and have that cake. . .it did my heart good, seriously. Especially that moment when Victor hears Alice say her vows back to him, and all he can think is that he didn't want to cry. . . Even if it wasn't necessarily the most "romantic" way to get married, I still just wanted to sweep them up in a big hug and weep for a while. XD And then the reception afterwards in the Land of the Dead, with Victor and Alice getting a surprise party from their dead loved ones, Victoria finally getting a chance to see the place, June reuniting with her mother and meeting her brother, and the kids giving Victor his pictures back? I don't think I could have ended that story any more perfectly.

10. A Wedding, A Wedding, We're Going To Have A Wedding, Chapter 7: In A World Of Our Own – Victor and Alice's Wonderland reception – Honestly, the whole fic is a win for me (as probably evidenced by the way it kept growing chapters), but the last bit, which was a complete last-minute "oh hey, if I did a Land of the Dead reception for Victor and Alice, I should do a Wonderland one too!" is just – so full of fluff, I swear. I wasn't expecting it to be so squee-inducing and squishy when I first came up with the idea, but. . .Alice's Wonderland and Victor's Otherland merging like they do, with the inhabitants of both their minds teaming up to give them a party? Showing once and for all they've stopped beating themselves up about stuff for the most part? Awwwwww. . .the bit that really gets me, though, is the very last part:

[. . .] Victor turned to offer Alice his arm as the various citizenry hurried off through the combined woods –

Then paused. A playful grin crossed his face. "What?" Alice asked, raising an eyebrow. "What are – Oh!"

Alice automatically grabbed for his neck as he suddenly scooped her up into his arms. "Oh," she repeated, trying to get her bearings. "Er – any particular reason for giving me a lift?"

"Well, you're my new wife," Victor told her, adjusting his grip. He nodded at the join between their two worlds, the Vale of Tears and the Living Dead Forest mingling in perfect harmony. "Aren't I supposed to carry you over the threshold?"

Oh, he was such a sap – and she loved him for it. "You are," she confirmed, snuggling into him. "If you would, Mr. Liddell?"

"My pleasure, Mrs. Van Dort."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH – no I DON'T know why that affects me so much but it FREAKING DOES. It just – ooof. *flops* Best way to end anything about their wedding, I swear.

And that covers it! All my favorite moments in the Forgotten Vows Verse! :D Hopefully you guys saw a few of your favorites in here as well. . . I'll see you all in the New Year! With any luck, we'll get some more content for this world, and maybe even a few more favorite moments. :)

[grimelords]

My November playlist is finished and I've done something slightly different by actually ordering the songs into a cohesive playlist rather than leaving them in the order I added them. Listen in for everyone's favourite genre, acoustic guitar instrumentals, followed by old fashioned cowboy country, comedy and ridiculous songs, 80s and modern dance, out-there piano instrumentals, rocks and rolls, oddball rap, christian rock buried where nobody will find it, noise rock of all flavours and Mirror Reaper in full. I guarantee there'll be at least something in four hours of music that you'll like. listen here!

Deixa - Toquinho: I love how much happens in this song even before it even kicks off at about a minute in. It cycles through so many different feelings before it really powers up and the drums come on. The rhythm from then on is just mesmerizing, it's just so busy and never dwells on any section for too long, the interplay between the melody, bassline and chord rhythm is amazing. And then at about 2:20 it powers up again! Bossa Nova Strong. Also I'm feeling very disrespected because I just did some research on this song only to find out it was sampled by Nujabes on one of his bad anime youtube hip hop songs.

Just A Closer Walk With Thee - Marisa Anderson: Traditional And Public Domain Songs is Marisa Anderson's weakest album, which is a shame because I love Traditional and Public Domain songs. Her playing is on point as always, but the tremolo and distortion she's using overwhelms the recording more often than not. This song is the best on the album purely because she's playing so quietly that it only shows up when she gets loud so it works perfectly near the end as it crescendos.

The Three Deaths Of Red Spectre - Gwenifer Raymond: Gwenifer Raymond has a new 'non-holiday specific single for a cold climate' in her words and I absolutely love it. The sheer velocity of the middle section is flooring, before it breaks apart totally and reforms into a sort of shanty before metamorphosing again into a heightening mania. I love the constantly shifting structure of this, it barely stops to give you room to breathe all the way through before the very end where it almost feels like it's going to collapse entirely.

Mister Sandman - Chet Atkins: Happy to report that I've had Mr Sandman stuck in my head for three weeks now and still don't really know the words because of tumblr posts. It alternates between 'mr email / e me a mail / make the attachment a pic of a snail' and 'mr sandman / sand me a man / make him the cutest man car door hook hand'.

Do I Ever Cross Your Mind - Chet Atkins & Dolly Parton: I've never gone much on Chet Atkins but my girlfriend showed my this song and it has completely reversed my opinion and it's mostly due to Dolly Parton. She is just so lovely on this it makes me tear up - the song itself is so nice and the playing is perfect but her personality just shines through so brightly it's an absolute delight.

There's A Man Going Around Taking Names - Lead Belly: I've been doing research to try to find out what this song is referring to, or its origin but I cannot find anything concrete. A few people are saying it inspired Johnny Cash for The Man Comes Around, which is plausible and adds a mystic bent to it. It seems incomplete, like it's missing the turn at the end that reveals who exactly he is or what's happening so the whole song just ends up feeling very mysterious and ominous.

When Mussolini Laid His Pistol Down - Merle Travis: This song is from 1943, which is sort of amazing because that means it's not a song about history particularly but rather current events. A great paragraph from wikipedia: "On 24 June Mussolini gave his last important speech as prime minister. It went down in history as the "boot topping" speech, with the Duce promising that the only part of Italy that the Anglo-Americans would be able to occupy (but forever and horizontally, i.e. as corpses) was the shore-line (for which he used a wrong word to define it). For many Italians, that confused and incoherent speech was the final proof that something was wrong with Mussolini." Mussolini, truly history's greatest moron.

The Master's Call - Marty Robbins: As a result of Red Dead 2 and my own natural instincts, I've been having a bigger than usual moment with cowboy music this month which of course includes Marty Robbins' Gunfighter Ballads And Trail Songs. In my mind this song is both the true ending and end credits music of Red Dead 2. Arthur sees the face of Christ in a lightning bolt and abandons his life of crime and sin, pleading with the lord to forgive him and then God kills a hundred cows with another lightning bolt just to make damn sure Arthur knows He's serious.

Saga Of The Ponderosa - Lorne Green: I was hanging out with my old housemate a few weeks ago and it turns out we were both having concurrent Marty Robbins cowboy music phases which was great news because then he turned me onto this album by Lorne Green who was on Bonanza and apparently took it upon himself to expand the Bonanaza Cinematic Universe in the 60s with a few albums. This song is apparently an origin story of Bonanza which I have never seen. It's extremely good, very powerful music. Great story of this godlike man striding across the country and overriding his wife's decision by naming his son HOSS.

Hard Sun - Eddie Vedder: I think it's interesting in A Star Is Born that Jackson Maine doesn't seem to be a real life equivalent of any actual musician. He's not obviously an archetype of any real person and so it's hard to place how exactly famous he is in the world of the movie. He's washed up enough to be playing pharmaceutical conferences but still has enough industry respect to be playing a tribute at the Grammys. The closest I could think of was Eddie Vedder oddly enough, and this song from the Into The Wild soundtrack really does sound like a Jackson Maine original.

For Chan - Tim Heideker: I'm having a real thing with comedy music recently and I can't tell if it means I've got a brain parasite or comedy music is good to me now. I think what I like about this song is the bluntness. There's no two ways about these people, and after years of hearing about the alt right as mysterious political genius computer brains it's a nice break to just hear them called greasy fat basement guys like we used to.

That's Right I'm Five - Don't Stop Or We'll Die: More good comedy music! They played this song on Comedy Bang Bang without announcing what it was called first, so the chorus really surprised me and made me laugh a lot. "They're selling the stocks so buy them, launch the torpedoes, tell my wife I love her, and send my son to college, bury me in the desert in my osh kosh b'gosh - that's right I'm five!" might be my favourite lyric of the year.

Future Brain - Den Harrow: Den Harrow is very good. He's like a beautiful moron American man that some italian scientists built in a lab in order to conquer America from the inside. Here are some good highlights from his wiki article: "The name Den Harrow was conceived by producers Roberto Turatti and Miki Chieregato, who based it on the Italian word denaro(money)." "After years of fame and popularity, it was revealed by frontman Stefano Zandri and his producers that Zandri did not actually sing the Den Harrow songs; he was essentially a character who lip-synched to vocals recorded by a number of other singers. Furthermore, since they did not consider Zandri's name and origin to be "trendy" enough, the producers R. Turatti and M. Chieregato concealed Zandri's Italian origin, marketing him as having been born Manuel Stefano Carry in Boston. This was done so Polydor Records could market him more easily in the English-speaking world, where Italian-produced music was, at the time, viewed with skepticism"

Love A Girl Right - Little Mix: Check out this rewrite of the Thong Song they did for the new Little Mix album. It's beyond belief. My girlfriend loves Little Mix and she's right to because they're the only girl/boy band that actually takes advantage of the form and does harmonies instead of just having them all sing in turn or all at once. They've got good vocal arrangements but they have the worst fucking songwriters working for them. Songwriters that pitch 'what if the Thong Song had a crunchy nu-metal guitar in it'.

This City Made Us - The Protomen: It's interesting to hear a band change styles - most other Protomen songs are a sort of Springsteen pastiche but this one from their newer single is more like Iron Maiden or Thin Lizzy. Approaching the 80s from a different angle. It's impressive to switch so radically and still have enough of a unifying sound that it feels like the same band. 80s throwback rock is a generally pallid genre populated by freaks who can't move on but Protomen put so much heart into it it's hard to write them off.

Teardrops - Womack & Womack: I love this song because it has two choruses. The drums stay the same throughout, the chords stay the same through the verse and chorus and only change for the second chorus/bridge part ("the music don't feel like it did when I felt it with you"), which just gives the whole song this feeling of beautiful endlessness. It goes and goes and goes and you're always already living in the best part of the song.

Boys Will Be Boys - The Duncan Sisters: Very very good piece of disco with a very nice piece of country picking guitar near the start for some reason. I quit like that the chorus of 'boys, oh boys, will be boys - they can really hurt you!' goes from a lighthearted thing about relationships until the bridge near the end where it sounds more like a dire warning. She's staring straight into your eyes and saying 'they can hurt you. boys can hurt you. they can really hurt you.' while motioning toward the exit with her eyes. 

Ayaya - Bicep: I've been trying to train my ear a bit better so I got a piano app on my phone and I just try to pick out the melodies of songs now when I'm bored. It turns out this is a very satisfying song to play. The melody is very simple, but the constant build and the couple of other melodies that come in around it make you feel like a super genius for just playing the same thing over and over.

The Call - David Mayer: I completely forget how I came across this song but I'm in love with the vocals on it. The effect reminds me of the one on Problem With The Sun by Nicolas Jaar, sort of pitched down and layered over itself. Outside of the vocals it's a pretty straightforward euro house chunk but damn sometimes a song just has a really good sound in it that you can't deny.

Problem With The Sun - Nicolas Jaar: My girlfriend's brother was telling me he was riding his bike the other day and had some kind of mental break where he was riding north in the afternoon but the sun was on his right, in the east - and for some reason his first instinct wasn't that he was wrong or disoriented, it was that there was a problem with the sun and it was in the wrong place. That boy ain't right but this song is good. I love that Nicolas Jaar uses this weird down pitched voice on a few songs and I really wish he'd bring it back, it sounds great and also funny to me.

Ensaslayi - Cecil Taylor: I don't have the brain power to comprehend any of Cecil Taylor's ensemble work that I've heard, free jazz in a band setting is simply too much for me it turns out -but I've really been getting a lot out of this solo album of his called Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly!. This song in particular is one of the longer ones on the album, where another is only 53 seconds long and a few last around ten minutes. This is a nice midpoint, where he gives himself so much room to get lost in different directions without losing the thread entirely. I said it last time I was talking about him but I've really never heard anyone play piano like this and I absolutely love it. A lot of reviewers describe it as him playing the piano like it's a drumkit, which I think is accurate to a degree - but I think looking back from here this music makes a lot more sense within the context of black midi and things like that. The extreme edges of what a piano can theoretically do, but with a decisive and beautiful human edge and human brain that's responsible for and making sense of the chaos.

The Homeless Wanderer - Emahoy Tsegué-Maryam Guèbrou: I found out about this album cause Benjamin Booker was posting about her on his instagram story and it's just incredible. The TL;DR of her story is she's an Ethiopian nun that studied music in Switzerland and Cairo and wrote this beautiful piano music based on traditional Ethiopian pentatonic music. I love the rhythm of it, every note in the right hand get swirled around and around before it's settled on while the left hand moves so smoothly and delicately. Unfortunately-ish she's obviously in that genre of Searching For Sugarman secret blog music evidenced by her spotify similar artists being Karen Dalton, Alice Coltrane and Connie Converse. That's not a bad thing exactly, at least people are hearing about her, but her music is unique and amazing enough on its own without needing much mythologizing.

Carnival Of The Animals: No 12 - Fossils - Camille Saint-Saëns: My girlfriend was showing me Saint-Saëns' The Swan and then we were going through the whole rest of the Carnival Of The Animals and I'm happy to report that he not only did he do one for fossils but also centered it around the idea of a bone xylophone. I'm going to write an article for Vulture tracing the origin of the cartoon bone xylophone and my thesis is it starts here.

Perth - Bon Iver: Just thinking about how good Bon Iver is. I love how massive this song can feel, the drums combined with the big brass. It's small and soft on the grand scale, but on an album that gets as quiet and soft as songs like Holocene this song blows up like an atom bomb.

Yet Again - Grizzly Bear: This really is one of the best songs of all time I've decided. It feels like I get into a thing of listening to it on repeat almost every month now. I don't know what it is exactly - I guess it's every part of it. The lyrics are impenetrable (check) the riff is simple and powerful (check) the drums are doing a lot and keeping it simple at the same time. The the way the harmony vocals all intertwine in the prechorus part is amazing. The way the whole song blows up into a big radio static solo at the end. Every part of this song is great, I just love it.

Fuckin N' Rollin - Phantastic Ferniture: I found out that Julia Jacklin has a side project with a very shit name and they make very good music. I love when people have a whole other band for another side of their self. This is just Julia Jacklin if the lyrics were just first draft whatevers instead of incredibly poignant and beautiful and the music was just rockin and rollin with your friends. It's great!

Soft - Kings Of Leon: Number one best song ever about havin a bad dick!! I'd love to hang out lady but my dick! I'm passed out in your garden, I'm in I can't get off I'm so soft! I'd pop myself in you body, I'd come into your party but I'm soft!

Soft Serve - Soul Coughing: I played this while I was driving with my girlfriend and she said 'what the fuck is this' and she's right, as usual. It's Soul Coughing baby! The 90s 'slacker jazz' band! They sound dated as fuck, a real product of their time but I think they've still got a lot to offer. I had the chorus of this stuck in my head for a couple days which made me listen to this album more than usual when I mostly prefer their first one Ruby Vroom. Irresistible Bliss might have the worst album cover of all time though, so it's got that going for it. Google it.

Ya Mama - Wuf Ticket: There wiki article for this band says they had two songs in 1982 and that was it. Then it has a section titled Greaseman and then the article ends. Here's the Greaseman section in its entirety: "Wuf Ticket's “Ya Mama” achieved its greatest notoriety, and airplay, as a music bed for bits by shock jock The Greaseman on WWDC-FM in Washington, D.C. and later his nationally syndicated radio show where Greaseman would argue with a surly service industry worker." Anyway this is more of that very good early hip hop shit where everyone assumed songs should go for 8 minutes. It's just extremely weak sauce Ya Mama jokes for a very long time before they change tack completely and start talking about how Every Woman Is An Angel And Without Mothers We Would Never Have Been Born So Think About That Next Time.

Gon Be Okay - Lil B: I had the part of this song where he sings 'things are never gonna be the same again' along with the piano in my head the other day and spent fully an hour googling to try to find what song it was from before giving up. I woke up the next morning and suddenly remembered it was this song but was very shocked to find out that he actually never sings that line along with the piano melody, he says it once at the start and that's it. What's going on with my brain. Anyway in my searching I found out that the piano is sampled from the Spirited Away soundtrack so once more in my life I've been led to ruin by anime.

2 Minute Drills - Allblack & Kenny Beats: This whole EP is great. More sports themed rap please. Allblack is ferocious and Kenny's production throughout is great, the perfect mix of simple straighforward beats that still have a lot of space and energy in them, plus 'Woah Kenny!' has my award for Best New Producer Watermark.

Don't Gas Me - Dizzee Rascal: I don't know how he keeps doing it but somehow Dizzee Rascal continues to make extremely fun bangers without ever slowing down. The best line in this is when he says "no I don't drink Appletiser" (the sparkling apple juice) which is an extremely weird flex if there ever was one.

Acid King - Malibu Ken: It feels insane that a Tobacco and Aesop Rock collab sounds as good as this. I love that there's no drums the entire time he's rapping and I completely love the Mort Garson vibes in the instrumental which turns out to be a perfect soundtrack to the Ricky Kasso satan worship LSD murder story that Aesop's telling. Also in reading about Kasso I just discovered the very good stoner doom band also named Acid King, so expect to see them in next month's list.

Pirate Blues - As Cities Burn: As Cities Burn have reformed and put out a new single so I've been thinking about them a bit. On paper they don't sound good, over three albums they morphed from a christian metalcore band to a christian alt-rock band, and while they never reinvented the wheel I think they're a remarkable band who took a lot of risks in their own way and made a lot of rock solid music. They've got a lot of great songs but I think this is my favourite from their third album when it finally felt like they'd settled into a steady alt rock sound informed by their much heavier past.

This Is It, This Is It - As Cities Burn: The thing I like about As Cities Burn is that as much as they're a christian band (yuck) they're more of a band of guys who are christians (slightly less yuck) and the difference is huge. Rather than evangelising or preaching, their songs are about their own personal struggles with their faith (still slightly yuck). I like this song especially because the lyric feels close to gospel, 'we're all singing for our sins, unless grace be the wind' but with the added twist of being furious that you're trapped by the sin of your physical body.

Timothy - As Cities Burn: I think this song is just incredible. The lyrics are so strong and direct and heartbreaking, the vocal performance especially is amazing and it may be the only time in history that a 6 minute guitar solo has seemed good and necessary.

Face Tat - Zach Hill: There's an incredible video of the recording of this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGi9SOFX5rc that really looks exactly how it sounds and has a very similar energy to that video of 80 guys singing the halo theme in the boys bathroom. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRG9KwvbVhk . This is what it sounds like when the boys are left alone. The biggest draw to Zach Hill's drumming is the intense primordial immediacy of it. He is just pounding away like a possessed animal and it's really on show here, especially combined with the occasional punctuating shout. Carson McWhirter's guitar is incredible too, the tone he's got where it sounds like three at once playing these incredible twisting riffs that turn on a dime. I think what I like most about this song is just how in sync they are - for such a chaotic, noisy song it sounds so rehearsed, somehow every single note is perfectly in time in the storm.

Betty's Worry Or The Slab - Hunters And Collectors: This is maybe the sweatiest song I've ever heard. It's a disgusting song about being incredibly sweaty and horny and I love the weird squeaky noise he makes after he says 'say it! say it!'. The bass sound in this is so fantastically meaty too, and combined with the brass at the end it's just great.

Worms Of The Senses / Faculties Of The Skull (live) - Refused: I cannot believe just how absolutely ferocious live Refused is. Insanely powerful without ever missing a beat in a song like this that requires incredible timing throughout. For some reason I've always thought Refused were an only ok live band after watching Refused Are Fucking Dead because all I remember of it is a clip where the guitarist accidentally hits the singer in the face with his headstock and they have to stop the show.

Mirror Reaper - Bell Witch: I got to see Bell Witch live a couple of weeks ago and it's one of the best shows I've ever seen. I can't really describe it other than it feels like the closest thing to a legitimate summoning ritual that I've ever seen. An invocation and an expelling of raw power and emotion between two people, it was really something. Also the best part was about two minutes in when they were really setting the scene with the sort of ambient beginning of Mirror Reaper and the whole crowd was dead silent and entranced as they built this mystic atmosphere and set the vibe a guy behind me said loudly to his friend 'hm pretty good so far!'

What's You Gonna Do When The World's On Fire - Lead Belly & Anne Graham: This is in my opinion the best genre of gospel song where they they just roast you for not being saved yet.​ 

listen here

[seacafes]

disney channel is going downhill: a rant.

    Growing up in the early 2000s, I feel as though as a child, I witnessed the peak of Disney Channel entertainment. Hannah Montana, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, and That’s So Raven were just a few of the wonderfully relatable and entertaining shows I watched as a kid.  The shows that Disney channel used to play tackled feminism, racism, body positivity, and had very diverse casts. The Disney Channel of the early 2000s sent some very positive messages to its young viewers long before we were old enough to understand how much we needed them. While a few newer kids shows may have some positive lessons or anecdotes in their episodes, the older shows seemed to more actively seek out opportunities to enlighten young audiences about what it means to be strong, well-rounded, and confident, no matter what their situation may be.

    Back then, we had “That’s So Raven”, that not only featured a black female lead who was as bold as she was hilarious, was also unafraid to tackle issues like body shaming and racism in ways that felt natural. Raven taught us that people come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and that we’re all beautiful. This shows in Season 2 Episode 8 of the show, released in April 2004, where Raven is excited over a vision of herself modeling her own clothes for a fashion show, until the magazine that sponsors it photoshops someone else's body over hers. Her body has been altered, and she appears much thinner than she really is. She is upset that her own body was not used, and also that the head of the agency only believes that there is only one look for all models. The fashion show director didn’t want Raven to model because she thought she was “plus size.”, and that apparently wasn’t good enough. In the end Raven  stands up for herself and proves that it’s what’s on the inside that really counts, not the outside.

    The channel also had a similar episode on Season 2 Episode 34 of the show the Suite Life of Zack and Cody, released in March 2007, where London and Maddie get insulted by Francesca (one of London's rich friends) while trying on clothes for a fashion show that they would both be participating in and then, after taking what she said and looking at themselves in a mirror that distorts their images (which can be seen as a reference to body dysmorphic disorder), both London and Maddie decide that they need to handle their weight issues before participating in a fashion show. London vows to lose weight and Maddie decides she must eat more to avoid being underweight. After London starves herself to the point of dizziness, while doing continuous laps around the hotel lobby, and Maddie has eaten several fast food burgers in a single day, the two prepare for the show, though as a result of their extreme methods, they both mess up their chance on stage. Afterwards, they discover that even London’s “perfect friend” Francesca has been stuffing her bra. This causes the two girls to agree that they are perfect the way they are, because nobody's perfect, saying, ‘What were we thinking? We were starving and stuffing ourselves, and we didn’t even need to do it. We should just be happy with the way we look. Next time one of your snarky friends makes a comment, let’s remind ourselves that we are perfect just the way we are.”

    Along with tackling physical issues, Disney Channel had shows and movies with strong leading roles played by women like Kim Possible and Wendy Woo from "Wendy Woo Homecoming Warrior" that taught us that girls can be tough and powerful too. Lizzie McGuire was so feminist that "subtle" isn't even an appropriate adjective. The show regularly dealt with the pressures of gender stereotypes, while exploring exactly what it meant to be a young woman exploring her identity.. It had Alex Russo from Wizards of Waverly Place, a character full of confidence, smarts, and wit, who constantly surpassed the low expectations that society had set for her in the show. Her deep exploration of her identity could get pretty inspiring. Kim Possible taught some important feminist life lessons by teaching young women that it's totally cool to be a sassy overachiever, and you don’t have to be a man to be a hero.

    All of these shows show that even though things might not be so good right now, everything will be okay in the end. They taught us how to react in certain situations, and how to handle the really hard ones. I still think back to episodes from my childhood when I find myself in a situation similar to one that I saw in one of my beloved shows, and because of them, I know what to do to make everything okay, or at least easier.

    In the early 2000s, it felt as though disney were ahead of their time. Many people like to claim, and I agree, that 2010 was when everything began to go downhill. In Season 1 Episode 7 of the show Shake it Up released in December 2010, the two main character’s Rocky and CeCe attend a party, where they are serving food to the supermodel guests. While serving, a supermodel approaches them and says, “You are adorable! I could just eat you guys up. You know- if I ate.” And goes on to laugh with her entourage. Former Disney Star Demi Lovato, who had left her own show “Sonny With A Chance” to deal with her own struggles with an eating disorder, tweeted about the joke, “I find it really funny how a company can lose one of their actresses from the pressures of an eating disorder and yet still make joke about that very disease,” Demi noted at the time, referencing her own very public battle with the disease. She also asked, “What are we promoting here? #notfunnyATALL.” This episode was a sad thing to see, seeing as in the past, we had Raven Baxter, London Tipton, and Maddie Fitzpatrick teaching us that jokes like that were not okay. That same year, in Season 1 Episode 9 of So Random!, more eating disorder jokes were said. In one of the sketches, a girl has her boyfriend meeting her family for the first time. She tells them, “Angus only eats one full meal a week ask him why” to which Angus replies, “My agents always on me about looking my best. She says to me “Ang-y, if you eat too many carbs, you won’t get the jobs. And I said “I knooow”.” But that’s not all! In an episode of Dog with a Blog (which, yes, is about a talking dog who runs a blog), the mother says, “I've been bitten, scratched, mauled, and puked on. And only one of those was self inflicted." implying that she made herself throw up, making light of the eating disorder, bulimia. If you didn’t think it could get worse- you’re in for a surprise! In an episode of the show Jessie, a character in a Zebra costume can be seen running away from a zebra. The zebra ends up catching him, and one of the kids witnessing the attack calmly states, “dressed like that, you were asking for it.” Why was that comment needed on a children’s show, Disney? What message are you trying to portray there? That if you dress a certain way, you’re “asking for it”? I don’t think so.

    Nowadays, the shows are filled with fake jokes and contrived situations that no one can believe or relate to. The kids in the shows wear tons of makeup and layers upon layers of fancy clothes. Miley Stewart only wore lots of makeup when she was performing as Hannah Montana. Even Sharpay Evans of East High had all the glitz and glam, but she wasn't over the top with makeup and her clothes.Why are the kids in shows like "Liv and Maddie" and "Jessie" dressing like adults and acting like they have real world adult problems; it seems like they've just skipped over their innocent childhood years.

    Along with continuously being problematic and lacking real lessons for the audience to learn, current Disney Channel shows also lack substance. Every show is the same! Looking at the shows now, the actors & actresses look more materialistic and over the top. The channel now has unrealistic storylines, where as the shows in the 2000’s had real-life storylines that were more relatable to us. Even the character’s themselves now lack substance, and with most show’s you can easily point out the stereotypical “smart kid”, “dumb kid”, “popular kid”, etc.

    Luckily, Disney has attempted to redeem themselves with show’s such as Girl Meets World, a remake of the infamous Boy Meets World, which tackles similar issues to the ones seen in older Disney shows that we all know and love. That show got cancelled after only a few seasons though, unfortunately, but Disney then released the show Andi Mack, which is about a girl named Andi who on her 13th birthday discovers that her sister is actually her mother who had her when she was young.  One of the main characters also recently came out as gay, and I hope that this trend will continue on with more Disney Channel shows in the future. But, I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

    Like the great Hannah Montana once said, Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days, everybody knows what I’m talking about, everybody gets that way. Nobody’s perfect, and I wish Disney Channel would remember that, instead of shoving show’s about a dog who runs a blog down children’s throats. Not to mention how they let a horribly problematic YouTuber influencing the youth of today with his wildly inappropriate content on to one of their shows, but that’s a whole other rant for another day.