#the acts of king arthur and his noble knights

[queer-ragnelle]

The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights by John Steinbeck | More quotes at Arthuriana Daily

[gellavonhamster]

" [...] Tell me, young sir, what is your mother like? Some odd stories have gone out about Morgan le Fay." "She has been very good to me," he said. "Of course, with her holdings and all her special duties, perhaps I have not been with her as much as she wished, but—yes, she has always been kind and even thoughtful. And when she is in good temper and all goes well, there's no one who can be more gay. She sings like an angel then and dances and makes jokes so funny that you crack your sides laughing." "When she is not gay, what then?" the lady Lyne asked. "Well, then we have learned to slip away. She is a person of very strong character."

— The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights by John Steinbeck

[dk-thrive]

“This is beyond understanding.“ said the king. "You are the wisest man alive. You know what is preparing. Why do you not make a plan to save yourself?” And Merlin said quietly, “Because I am wise. In the combat between wisdom and feeling, wisdom never wins.”

― John Steinbeck, The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights (Penguin Classics; December 30, 2008) (via Alive on All Channels)

[henryfitzempress]

James Purefoy could be... Sir Balin of Northumberland, the Knight With Two Swords.

[ramblings-of-a-chaotic-neutral]

And I'm back with Part 3 of the "Merlin accidentally conquers Camelot" au! Thank you all so much for your patience and continued support for this story! It makes me so happy to see people get excited by my silly (and occasionally delusional) au ideas!

NOTE: You can find part 1 here and part 2 here.

EDIT: And you can find part 4 here!

And without further ado, onto the new stuff!

It was rather drafty in the lesser furnished cells of the dungeons. Merlin knew this well, as he had spent many nights during his first couple of years in Camelot trying and failing to get any sleep on the cold stone floors of those cells, kept awake by the freezing chill that would sweep through the dungeons at any given moment.

Merlin also knew that Arthur had never been kept in one of those cells, even on the rare occasions that Uther had him locked up for going against his orders. Whenever Arthur had to be put in the dungeons, he had been put in the fully furnished cells, meant for prisoners who were members of noble families.

Even when they were held in the same dungeon, the nobles and the peasants were subjected to wildly different experiences.

With that in mind, Merlin stopped by Arthur's chambers (or... were they his chambers now? Merlin certainly didn't want to think about that.) to grab Arthur's favorite blanket off of his bed. It was a luxuriously soft blanket, dyed a rich Pendragon red. That blanket was fit for a king and a pain for a manservant to wash, but Merlin had always taken good care of the blanket, knowing how much Arthur liked it.

Merlin folded up the thick blanket with meticulous care, ignoring both his own trembling hands, rendered unsteady by the volatile emotions welling up in him, and Gwaine's presence behind him, silent for once. Despite Gwaine's undying loyalty and penchant for mischief landing Merlin in an even worse situation than before, he seemed to understand the solemnity of Merlin's actions and the profound sense of grief over the life he had lived once before that had been so suddenly torn away from him.

The motions of carefully folding up the blanket filled Merlin with both comforting familiarity and near-crippling sorrow. Would he ever do this again, ever provide support and comfort for Arthur again? As much as Merlin wished to stay optimistic, even if his plan to reinstate Arthur as the rightful king of Camelot succeeded, the darkest corners of his mind hissed that Arthur would never tolerate his presence again, let alone trust him, after usurping him and, in Arthur's eyes, proving everything Uther had ever said about sorcerers to be true.

Merlin's heart plummeted, nearly stopping him in his track towards the dungeon entirely, at the mere thought of what Arthur must think of him now: a treacherous, conniving sorcerer who had manipulated Arthur into becoming his friend only to betray him. Merlin blinked, banishing his tears before they could roll down his face and fall onto the blanket in his arms, and forced his feet to keep moving steadily forward. No matter what Arthur thought of him now, how deeply Merlin has unintentionally wounded his friend, or how catastrophically Merlin's world felt like it was crumbling down around him, he needed to set things right.

Merlin clung desperately to that conviction, the thrumming need to set things right again, as everything else in him wanted to curl up in a dark corner and never move again. After an eternity and yet all too soon, Merlin descended past the gates of the dungeon, where he forbade Gwaine from following him any further, down the noble cell blocks, which were filled with sleeping, but thankfully uninjured knights, and finally through the dark, damp, empty, and cold peasant cells.

He couldn't see Arthur at first, but his magic sensed that he was here. Like always, it jumped, tugging on Merlin to act, whenever Arthur was nearby, causing Merlin to pause his step in order to focus on whatever his magic was attempting to do. This time, it tugged his attention towards the unlit torches lining the walls of the cell block. Light them, his magic seemed to beg of him, our king is cold!

Merlin's immediate reaction was to stop his magic, to push it down so that no one would notice, and, after a deep breath, he did just that. As Merlin stood still, holding Arthur's blanket in his arms and cherishing what would likely be the last few seconds that he could ignore what had happened over the last day and pretend that everything was normal, he heard the voice that he'd been both yearning and dreading to hear for the past day coming from the cell at the very end of the dungeon.

"If you're waiting to sneak up on me, you'll have to try harder than that. I can hear that neither magic nor a crown have made you any more stealthy, Merlin."

Merlin flinched backwards, expecting but yet somehow still unprepared for how much vitriol and bitterness Arthur hissed out his name with. He had heard Arthur yell out his name in variety of tones over the years, ranging from annoyed to bemused to downright furious, but he had never heard his name pass from Arthur's lips like this, spat out from his mouth like it was poisonous and vile. It caused so much hurt to well up in Merlin's chest that he felt it like a bruising punch, causing him to wince in pain, still hiding where Arthur could not see him.

As Merlin stood silently, only a few steps away from Arthur's cell and facing Arthur's well-deserved fury, and tried to desperately blink away the tears gathering in his eyes, his magic abruptly tugged his attention towards the torches again, more insistent this time. Letting out a stuttering breath, Merlin obliged with his magic's request this time, and the torches lining the walls burst into bright, golden flames in an instant, filling the cells with a merry warmth that felt entirely out of place.

Merlin heard a sharp gasp coming from Arthur's cells as soon as the torches lit up by themselves and winced. Right, Arthur was fresh off of Merlin's betrayal, so he was probably pretty jumpy, especially around magic.

Merlin's guilt rose alongside his frustration. Everything he does with his magic, he does it for Arthur, and yet every single damned time it backfires on him and somehow hurt Arthur! A spell meant to heal his father kills the king instead. A battle waged to ensure his continued reign steals his sovereignty instead. And lit torches meant to provide him with warmth and comfort scares him instead!

But before even more guilt could build up inside of him, Merlin heard Arthur's voice once more.

"I won't be scared by a coward of a sorcerer who would steal everything from the man he claimed to serve! Or is the great Emrys too important to even face the fool he tricked into believing that he was his friend?"

Before Merlin's mind could even process Arthur's words, his feet were already carrying him to the end of the hallway, right to the front of Arthur's cell. He needed to prove Arthur wrong here, their years of friendship weren't a lie or a trick, Arthur needed to believe that! Too much of Merlin's life, his very soul, was woven into his bond with Arthur, he couldn't let Arthur have any doubt that their bond was even real!

As he finally arrived at the door to the cell that held Arthur, Merlin's heart stuttered again, this time with grief. Based on the ferocity in his voice, Merlin had expected to see Arthur pressed up against the bars, ready to battle his perceived opponent. Instead, he was greeted by the sight of Arthur, sitting alone on the dirty stone floor, his face wearing the same dejected and defeated look it had just days earlier, after Morgana had taken the citadel and Arthur doubted his own ability to rule his people. The only difference was that the lost look in Arthur's eyes from before was gone, replaced by a scornful glare that had Merlin feeling like he was the scum of the earth.

Merlin opened his mouth, ready to apologize, plead for forgiveness, whatever it took to just stop Arthur from looking at him like that, like Merlin was his enemy, but no words could form in his mouth, as too many emotions were welling up in his chest that it closed off his throat entirely. Merlin drew in a deep, fortifying breath, purposefully avoiding eye contact with a still-glaring Arthur the entire time. Once he felt like he had his feelings even marginally under some tenuous control, he finally met Arthur's gaze and held out the blanket like a pathetic peace offering.

"I brought you your blanket. I know it gets cold down here."

Merlin was rather proud that his voice only wavered slightly, not giving an indication of how disastrously close he was to breaking down into tears in the middle of the dungeons. Arthur merely stared at him for a moment, bewilderment appearing on his face for a few seconds before it was quickly wiped away by angry sneer.

"I don't accept gifts from the likes of you, sorcerer! It's probably cursed or enchanted to kill me so that you can finally get me out of your way for good!"

"No!"

The blanket fell to the floor as Merlin grasped the bars of the cell with both hands and pulled himself as close as he could to Arthur, who had flinched back at Merlin's outburst. His magic flared again, wanting to break down this barrier between them so that he could get closer to Arthur, but he denied its request, knowing that such an action would only agitate Arthur even more.

"Arthur, please, I never meant for any of this to happen! You must believe me! I only wanted to for Camelot to be safe from Morgana and for you to retake the throne! I only want to secure your reign, not end it!"

That, it seemed, finally got a reaction out of Arthur, but it wasn't the one Merlin was hoping for. Arthur finally stood up from the floor and stormed over to the cell door, getting close to Merlin, but just out of reach.

"And why on earth should I trust a word you say?! You've done nothing but lie to me for years, even when I gave you my complete trust! I thought you were my closest friend, the one person in my life who would never betray me, but as it turns out, I never even knew your real name, much less where your true loyalties lie!"

Merlin's face fell at Arthur's accusations, knowing that he was, in some ways, completely right in them. Still, he met Arthur's accusing glare with as much honesty as he could. After all that his own actions had taken from Arthur, he owed him the truth at the very least. Merlin spoke again, trying to muster up a calm, soothing tone despite his strong emotions.

"I know that you don't have much reason to trust what I say now, but I will do all that I can take make this right. I was born with magic, yes, but I was born this way for a purpose, and that purpose is you, Arthur. I am Emrys, destined to be the guardian of the Once and Future King, who will rule over the greatest kingdom history has ever known and bring peace the likes of which has never been seen throughout the land."

Merlin could see the moment of realization on Arthur's face as he put together who exactly the Once and Future King was, his eyes going wide with shock. Despite the situation, Merlin has just a bit of a smile on his face as he reminisced on fond memories.

"When I first met you, I just couldn't understand how such a prattish clotpole could ever be a king of legend, but the longer I stayed by your side, the more I could see the king that you were destined to become. A great man, a great leader, who will always stand up to protect his people, even if it means putting himself in danger."

Merlin's speech trailed off as he smiled gently at Arthur, trying desperately to give him reason to believe Merlin, to believe in the prophecy that tied them together, and, above all, to believe in himself.

To Merlin's surprise, he could see Arthur confusion melting into... something. It looked like something along the lines of hope or awe, which gave Merlin hope in return. But just as quickly as it was there, Arthur's expression shifted again to a frustrated anger.

"Even if what you're saying isn't some trick, your little bedtime story is wrong anyways! I can't be the Once and Future King if I'm not even a king in the first place!"

Merlin sighed deeply, knowing that they'd get to this point eventually. He had a plan, but would Arthur ever agree to it?

"I've tried! I tried to simply order the council to make you king again, but they won't do it! Geoffrey stopped me with some old laws that Bruta wrote! He said that I can't abdicate the throne to you because you're no longer legally a nobleman."

Arthur eyes widened frantically at the mention of Bruta's laws, his breathing picking up with panic. He backed up from the bars of the cell and began pacing around.

"Bruta's code, damn it, I forgot that they applied in these situations! Wait..."

His eyes snapped back to Merlin, looking red-rimmed and on the verge of tears. His voice, which was so full of fire mere seconds ago, now sounded hollow. Merlin's hope wilted upon seeing Arthur like this, and his magic flared again, still wanting to destroy the barrier between them.

"This means that the Pendragon house is no longer recognized, doesn't it?"

Merlin could only nod, unsure of what he could do to comfort Arthur. At Merlin's confirmation, Arthur took a shaky breath, trying to collect himself from the inner turmoil that he was surely experiencing.

"Everything... I've lost everything."

Merlin gave Arthur what he hoped was his most comforting smile, but it didn't do much for Arthur's hopeless disposition. After a small sigh, Merlin spoke again in a soft, comforting voice.

"Arthur, all is not lost. I have a way to make you king again! We just have to make you a noble again, and then I can abdicate the throne to you! And luckily for both of us, there's an easy way to make a peasant a nobleman quickly! And you should know, you wrote it into the laws yourself!"

Arthur blinked at him, not comprehending what Merlin had said for a couple seconds, before a sliver of hope showed on his face. However, as soon as it was there, it was gone again, once more replaced by anger and betrayal. Arthur quickly stormed over to the cell door, this time reaching the door itself and wrapping his hands around the bars so that he could yell in Merlin's face.

"I knew it! This was a trick!"

"What are you talking about? How would me knighting you and then giving you back your throne be a trick?!"

"You would have me swear on oath of fealty to you, which would legally, and for all I know magically, put me under your command! This was all just another plot to control me, wasn't it?!"

"Oh come on, you wouldn't have to mean it when you take the oath! You'd just have to say the words and then let me abdicate!"

"So now sacred oaths of loyalty are nothing but empty words to you?!"

"Gods, you really can't make anything easy for the both of us, can you, you prat! I'm just trying to give you your crown back!"

"You would have me disrespect the sacred oaths of knighthood! I would never swear an oath of fealty to you! It is a sacred bond of trust, which is apparently something that you know nothing about, Emrys!"

Merlin flinched back, still unused to Arthur saying the name given to him by the druids, much less hissed out in anger. Merlin backed away from the cell door and took a deep breath, trying to find some solution to this mess.

"So, I take it that you would not accept a knighthood from me?"

"Never."

Merlin sighed again, his eyes drifting around the dungeons as he tried to think of a different way to make Arthur a nobleman. Eventually, his eyes drifted back towards Arthur, who was still holding onto the bars of the cell door. As Merlin looked at Arthur, pondering any solution that he could possibly come up with, a metallic flash caught Merlin's eye, drawing it to Arthur's left hand.

There, the torchlight was reflecting off of Ygraine's ring, the one that Arthur rarely ever took off. Merlin was glad that Arthur still had it with him after everything that had just happened to provide some comfort, but it still didn't present Merlin with any solutions...

Wait.

Oh no.

Swallowing thickly, Merlin called out to Arthur again.

"Arthur, do you know of any, any other ways to elevate a peasant to the status of a noble?"

"I'm afraid not. Me granting knighthoods to peasants was the first legal opportunity for peasants to elevate their stations. There is no other way."

Merlin closed his eyes and tried to hold back his frustration. He wouldn't have to resort to that, surely?

"And you've really thought this through, Arthur? If you don't accept a knighthood, I don't think that there's any other way that I can legally make you a noble again, much less the king. Are you really prepared to go the rest of your life as a peasant with no title, no lands, no riches, nothing?"

Merlin could see that his words gave Arthur pause, forcing him to at least reconsider Merlin's offer. Merlin internally pleaded with Arthur to please don't be an idiot, just take the offer!

Finally, Arthur seemed to have reached his decision, as he glared at Merlin once again with conviction.

"I might be forced to live out my days as a peasant, but at least I'll be a peasant with my honor and integrity intact."

Merlin was, at this point, sorely tempted to bash his head into the stone wall behind him. Why, why did this clotpole have to make his life so difficult?!

Merlin gave a heavy sigh as he nodded, accepting Arthur's decision. Arthur looked rather smug about Merlin conceding to him, which he wouldn't be feeling if he knew exactly what Merlin had in mind as his contingency plan.

"Very well then. You've made it clear that you won't willingly take this one opportunity for me to give you your throne back. But make no mistake, you are the Once and Future King. This is your destiny, and I will see that it comes to pass, no matter what I have to do. I know that it might be unfair, but I only ask that you forgive me for what I do next. Please remember, everything I do, I do for you and the kingdom that you're destined to build."

Arthur's expression had gone from smug to confused to concerned very quickly, but Merlin didn't acknowledge the slight fear that had appeared on Arthur's face. Instead, he carefully pushed Arthur's blanket, which had been lying at the foot of the cell door, through the bars, ensuring that Arthur could grab it.

After that, Merlin turned on his heel and walked out of the now silent dungeons, his footsteps sounding authoritative and ominous as they echoed off of the stone walls.

Despite his measured footsteps, Merlin's mind was moving at sprinter's pace, trying to plan out everything that would need to be done in the coming days. The first thing that he definitely needed to do was let the steward know that he needed to plan a wedding on short notice.

After all, it wasn't uncommon for conquerors to marry their war prizes.

I hope you all enjoyed this continuation! Were you right in your guess as to what Merlin had in mind at the end of part 2? Please let me know if you'd like another part of this story!

I'll try to tag everyone who asked for a part 3 here. Thank you all for your support!

@magic-mushroomss @miyriu @whole-buncha-snakess @achillesuwu @aerismoon

@tidalwavesandthunderstorms @marki9 @isaidno @retro-wallflower @samwinjester

@lascienzadellafantasia @sugar-coated-prat-dragon @theoldfroglady @ryeallytired @mind-of-a-crow

@whynotreinventmyselfeveryday @likeapaperplane @odinjm @orliththedragon @aglmry

@caraspud @aostrek-236 @justaz @slippysalt @coffee-shop-gay

@the-king-and-the-druidess @theroundbartable @fanfic-library-for-me @linotheghost @scuttlingsleipnir

@guiltyscarlet

And, as always, than you for reading through my ramblings! :D

[akelafang]

Fics idea:

Someone is being a dick to Merlin (a knight or a visiting noble or someone of high importance) and Merlin doesn't do much about it cause, you know, he's a servant. He just grits his teeth and hopes this person's visit will be short. Not too long after the person starts acting weird and skittish around Merlin, almost like they're frightened by the sight of him. Merlin is very confused and starts jumping to conclusions, thinking maybe they saw him do magic or, hell, maybe his magic is unintentionally repelling them to protect him. In actuality, Arthur noticed how this person was treating Merlin and made sure to put the fear of the King and The Knights of the Round Table in them for daring to hurt his Merlin.

[wispeth]

Every knight of the round table possesses a trait that Arthur admires about them--a trait that he inevitably adopts himself, trying to mold himself into someone he is proud to be, by looking first at the people he admires, and why. Mimicry is the highest form of flattery after all.

Leon was the first person Arthur ever truly admired. When Arthur was a boy, he took a first notice of Sir Leon during his (Leon's) knighting ceremony. After a boyish bout of asking round the guests, Arthur had deducted that Sir Leon was something of a prodigy swordsman; the ginger haired man was younger than most who'd been knighted that day, but he was given additional honors for a recent act of heroism. It certainly raptured the princeling's attention.

That and, Uther looked genuinely pleased with him, which caught the eye of the little prince, who wished for his father to see him in the same light. Little Arthur wanted also to be something his father was proud of. So he looked to Sir Leon.

The knight was loyal. He was honorable. He was chivalrous. He was obedient. He was a proper soldier. He was everything a knight was meant to be; Arthur could see then why his father would be proud. Arthur took pride in him as well, still did, far beyond those days of youth.

The princeling was not jealous, no. He was awestruck. 'I could do that too,' he thought in wonder. 'I could be a knight.' He couldn't have been older than nine at the time: no idea who he was, but he did know, in his heart of hearts, that he, too, wanted to be a man like that.

Far later, now, Leon is a knight of the round table. His place at the table represents the soldier in Arthur--his roots--reminds him what he's fighting for: for Camelot, for home.

Lancelot, as well, was someone that Arthur admired. He faught only for the most noble of reasons, and was otherwise a very gentle (albeit gently chaotic) soul. He was kind, and he was charming, and Merlin--that was someone else who's opinion mattered--Merlin always looked happy to see Lancelot.

Arthur could do that as well. He could be kind.

Then there was Gwaine. That one, he, oddly enough, signified Arthur's humility. He was messy, sure, plenty rough round the edges, but he was a serious man when it counted (and not a second more).

Becoming a knight made him no less human. He was just as much of a man as he was before, just as much of a drunk, and a troublemaker, and just as good a friend. Similarly, even being but a mortal man of mortal mistakes, he was no less of a knight.

Arthur took a page from his book: to be a man first, and a king second. He would not make kingly decisions that would hurt his honest heart, and he would not do reckless things with the heart he uses to rule.

And Merlin--gods above, Merlin--there lies the heart in question. Merlin was hope itself. He was everything sacred in the world that Arthur vowed to protect.

Merlin was, well, he was odd, to say the least. He was gangly, and waifish, and awkward and clumsy--sassy, that one--and boyish too. Merlin went about life as if he learned how to be a person from the ground up, as if he was never told how to behave, as if--when he was young, and full of sunshine still--he was simply let loose, and never told to protect himself.

And still yet, it seemed that he wore his heart on his sleeve everywhere he went, as if nothing bad could happen to it while it was on display. And Arthur would wrangle the fates into obedience if it meant never having to prove Merlin wrong.

[arthurthepeoplesprincess]

Merlin fandom try not to act like the Knights of the Round Table were secretly pro-magic activists challenge (impossible). Why do you act like they weren’t grown ass men who willingly chose to work for the system oppressing magic users?

it wasn’t a secret to anybody that one of the obvious job requirements was occasionally murdering people.

But but you don’t get it! When the magic reveal happens, they’re all going to be protecting babygirl Merlin against bad alpha Arthur (as if they weren’t all following the same fucking system).

You can’t possibly believe these people actually give a fuck about magic. I’m so sorry but that’s ridiculous.

Controversial opinion, but when you think about it, Arthur was actually the least worst of them all because, unlike the rest of them, he was the only one who had no choice in doing this job. He was canonically groomed into becoming a child soldier and was brainwashed and abused directly by the fucking dictator himself. He canonically said that if he had a choice in his life, he wouldn’t be here, and if I’m not mistaken, he was the only one of them to ever question if the system was wrong. The rest of them were just going with it with no second thoughts and didn’t give a fuck at all.

A lot of people fail to remember that 1) Uther is the only family Arthur ever knew, 2) his only family also happens to be the narcissistic tyrant who we saw committing all types of atrocities, 3) he was isolated (he didn’t even have friends before Merlin arrived), and 4) he was only fed lies and half-truths his entire life.

Like, is it crazy that he was brainwashed?? No?? Why do you act like he was like that solely because he’s an annoying brat lol.

And imagine this: after all that brainwashing, where your abuser drills 'Magic is evil' in every possible way, he unfortunately gets proven right multiple times (82.05% of the times Arthur was aware of magic being used, it was used in a harmful way, based on a meta made by anarchycox, thenerdyindividual on AO3).

So, considering all the brainwashing, the abuse, and magic being used to hurt Arthur or someone he loves or the entire kingdom, he still has it in him to try and think that maybe there’s good in everyone, that maybe Uther was wrong.

Do you know how crazy that is?? I want you to stop and think: would you do that if you were in his situation? Because I’m definitely not going to, but maybe I’m just an immoral person lol.

And also, stop acting like Arthur wasn’t doing anything when he became king. He stopped the mindless murder of anyone who had magic and only punished those who used it to do harm and that was after a trial.

You might say that this is just the bare minimum, which is somewhat correct but not entirely because 1) Arthur only ruled for four years, meaning he didn’t have time, 2) there were tensions and wars started by Uther that he was trying to undo, meaning the magic situation wasn’t the only thing going on, and 3) the entire population had been brainwashed for 30 years and was terrorized by Morgana’s followers very recently. Like, sure, it’s definitely a good decision as a newly crowned king to just suddenly repeal the laws and no one would mind not Uther's followers, not the nobles, and certainly not the average citizen, right?

Also disclaimer: this is neither me hating on the knights nor saying you can’t like them, nor is it me excusing everything Arthur ever did or saying that he was 100% innocent, because he definitely wasn’t. It’s just me saying that maybe you should consider his trauma and point of view before making him into the bad villain and then believing that the knights were better people, because they definitely weren’t.

[sneakyboymerlin]

Some people don’t seem to get the gist of Gwaine’s character so let me break it down:

Gwaine deciding that Arthur is worth defending as a king and wanting to repay him for saving his life… does not mean that he loves Arthur the way he loves his literal best friend. Gwaine is deeply bound by his sense of morality, and his moral compass points him to Arthur. The anger with which Gwaine responds to threats against Arthur is identical to his response when, say, the Cailleach laughs at the knowledge that innocent people are dying because of her own inaction. Gwaine posits himself as a defender of good, and Arthur proved himself to be “noble” in his eyes. Ergo, he protects Arthur, as he protects civilians.

All in all, there is nothing really personal to their bond, just as there is little personal about Gwaine’s duty to the people of Camelot. Gwaine and Arthur have a begrudging respect for each other, and both have a sense of duty to ensure that the other does not come to harm. This dynamic does not need to be construed as anything other than what it is, but since we have been conditioned to believe that people can only act altruistically given a motive of friendship, romance, or family, their actions are subsequently read as such—contrary to the onscreen evidence.

I cannot stress this enough: this series is based on Arthurian legend. The knights are meant to display chivalry. That is the bond between them.

This differs greatly from Merlin and Gwaine’s dynamic, wherein Gwaine’s attachment does not stem from a sense of duty but, rather, his own personal feelings. He is drawn to Merlin from the start, finds an understanding and emotional support from Merlin that he’s never had with anyone before, and is stunned touched that Merlin hasn’t grown tired of him, despite the burden he’s placed on Merlin’s shoulders since his arrival in Camelot. By contrast, Arthur grew sick of Gwaine… almost immediately, and their dynamic was established as one of mutual duty the moment Arthur said, “He saved my life… He’s to be given anything he needs.” This is very much a discernible difference. An important one, too.

This is the reason that, despite how he is willing to lay down his own life for Arthur as early as 3x04, Gwaine explicitly does not consider him a friend afterwards in 3x08, but does for Merlin.

Furthermore, given Gwaine’s moral code—the very same one he used to judge Arthur as “noble”—Gwaine would indeed side with Merlin over Arthur in the case of a magic reveal (not to mention the fact that Merlin is his friend, he knows that Merlin is good, and he doesn’t want Merlin to be hurt). Gwaine believes that one’s actions determine their goodness, rather than their birth circumstances. Therefore, Merlin being born with magic is not proof that he is corrupt.

Outside of magic reveal scenarios, and despite his sense of duty to Arthur, Gwaine is still shown to put Merlin first. There is nothing wrong with Gwaine placing Merlin above Arthur. It’s not “unfair” to Arthur that Gwaine cares more about Merlin, and it’s not something that needs fixing. Arthur is not entitled to Gwaine’s love or loyalty. It’s beautifully satisfying, both emotionally and narratively, that Gwaine’s loyalty is to a servant first and a king second. That is the entire crux of Gwaine as a character. It is a deliberate choice on the part of the writers, and it’s perfect as is.

[cynthia39100]

Merlin rewatch -- S2E13: The Last Dragonlord

Arthur & Merlin 1

It’s cute how Merlin hastened a bow to the King and hurried to Arthur’s side. He was still a bit scared of Uther but of course he would follow Arthur first and foremost 👑 His face was visibly brighter too after witnessing Arthur's noble act/open defiance of King, compared to the previous ash-grey. Love it.

I love Arthur’s blue shirt just in general but also him not wearing chainmail this time made him visually more equal to Merlin and I like it. They got matching colour💙

They were so intimidated by the scary men in the tavern lol. So cute. It’s lovely when Arthur didn’t have the prince card and had the exactly same reaction as Merlin.

Love Merlin’s worried face, Arthur’s high-pitch “It’s all right” and his beautiful weak/injured face.

Wow Arthur called Merlin’s name at least 3 times (according to the subtitles) in dream.

So happy there wasn’t any taunting from Arthur when Merlin said Balinor wouldn’t come. They were so on the same team this ep.

I just have a thing with Arthur covering Merlin's mouth with gloved hand😌 And the manhandling. And the protection mode.

It’s still amazing that Merlin always rode beside Arthur, and all the knights fell behind. There must be some complaints coming out. I want to see how Arthur deals with them.

[S2E13] [other episodes]

[queer-ragnelle]

The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights by John Steinbeck | More quotes at Arthuriana Daily

[gellavonhamster]

They passed through valleys among surrounding heights and they saw the turf-crusted ramparts of hill forts that had crumbled before the world was born. On a great level meadow they saw rings of giant stones set up possibly by ancient peoples but more likely by present goblins, and since these things were outside the quest, they looked away and circled widely. Then, within sight of a forest, they drew near to a small conical hill crowned with dark pines, and their horses stopped and trembled with ears laid back and eyes showing white with fear. Sir Ewain and Sir Gawain recognized the signs and turned aside to avoid the barrow. It was not their business or their world. Their own was full enough of wonders.

— The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights by John Steinbeck

[jonsnowunemploymentera]

This isn’t really a fully formed thought or anything. But it’s interesting how Sansa, Jon, and Lyanna specifically factor into one of GRRM’s greater explorations on the merits of fantasy. More specifically, there is a common trope that connects these three characters: a princess locked in a tower transforming into a valiant knight/hero. Lyanna and Jon, for starters, are pretty obvious explorations of this. Lyanna is the reconstructed version of this classic trope especially as presented through Arthurian tradition; but the twist here is that the dragon/knight who “locks” her in the tower isn’t actually evil and she isn’t so much kidnapped but rather willingly chooses to go there with him. This princess in a tower directly results in the birth of the hidden prince trope, which is even older than Arthur. So one fantasy classic, Rhaegar and Lyanna, leads to another with Jon being Arthur (a hidden prince and destined king), Percival (a hero who grows up in obscurity but has a great destiny to save the land), and Galahad (a noble hero destined to be even greater than his father, Rhaegar/Lancelot, ever was) all at once.

This princess dies in the tower…but her spirit/ghost lives on through her son, who grows up to look and act just like her, eventually becoming the valiant hero you read in the stories (but again, a de/reconstructed version). Part of how Jon does this is by repeating Lyanna’s actions as the valiant “knight” protecting an innocent from bullies. So by making it out of that tower even though his mother didn’t, Jon becomes the survival and rebirth of the fantasy ideal. You could even make the argument that just because Lyanna died doesn’t mean fantasy died as well because it lives on through Jon, her son. And this is actually is aided by Lyanna’s pleading for her son’s life, so she has some agency in how fantasy is preserved in the same way she had agency in how it’s perpetuated when she protected Howland Reed and when she ran off with Rhaegar. The princess living on and becoming the hero/knight in the stories is thus taken on by two characters here: Lyanna and Jon, mother and son. Jon goes even further into the Arthurian-knight playbook by encountering and eventually killing another vicious bully, Janos Slynt, who was coincidentally had a hand in his father’s demise. Then enter princess in the tower 2.0, Sansa Stark.

Sansa is an interesting case because she’s not martial in the way Lyanna and Jon are. But she too encounters her fair share of knights and villains. Janos Slynt is one of them, and Littlefinger will be another. I’ve talked about this before but Jon becoming the valiant hero Sansa wished for is important because it directly plays into GRRM’s reconstruction and (imo) defense of the ideals of fantasy. It’s not so much that heroes don’t exist - they actually do. They just might be far away, or might be the ones you’d never expect. This is the opposite of the “fantasy is dead, stop believing because everything sucks” reading you might see in some sections of the fandom. This moment may not end up meaning much for Jon and Sansa and their relationship, but it means a lot to us readers who are audiences of GRRM’s conversations with the genre and his arguments for its appeal. But that’s not the only interesting thing because Sansa, unlike Lyanna, does eventually make it out of the tower. But she’s currently in the hands of Littlefinger who, like Janos Slynt, was a villain responsible for her father’s demise. In this scenario, will she have to wait for a valiant hero to come take care of him again? Or will she instead don the knight’s armor (figuratively) by enacting justice in her own right? Based on the GoHH’s prophecy, it looks like it will be the latter; and it’s important to note how often “armor” as a motif is repeated in Sansa’s chapters. Thus, the princess evolving into the hero is told through the arc of a singular character here. Sansa is the princess who makes it out of the tower to become a hero of her own making; important disclaimer though, Littlefinger doesn’t really play into the elements of knighthood but he does count as an evil lord holding a princess hostage so Sansa can still be a subversion of the knight rescuing the maiden - the lesson being that she is her own knight, her own salvation!

It’s a very powerful meta-textual thread that exists between these three characters. They all fit into a wider narrative about fantasy and how it can live on, whether played straight or twisted a little crooked. So Sansa doesn’t have to be an overt in-universe parallel to Lyanna because that’s just not her role in the story. And I personally don’t think any “similarities” they have are actually important to Sansa as a person or to Jon because let’s face it, Lyanna’s primary (and most important) role is to be Jon’s mother and everything else informs on that. But both these women (and Jon) can be meta twinsies based on how they fit into GRRM’s wider narrative goals.

[tansyuduri]

Merlin Loregasm Rewatch S1E5

Hi Everyone! Welcome to my rewatch of Merlin focusing on the lore. I am a giant nerd so pretty excited about this. We’re on LANCELOT

Lancelot: It's my life's ambition to join the Knights of Camalot OKAY let's talk knights! While most knights were nobles. (Especially in the later middle ages) Not all were. In the early middle ages it was not that unusual for a commoner to be knighted for acts of valor in battle, Great service to a much higher lord, or marrying a noble woman. While this got much more rare it did not fully die out. So Lancelot coming as a commoner and hoping to be a knight is unusual but not unheard of. His way of going ABOUT it is a bit odd.

Arthur: Right you jumped up dung beetle this is it. your final test. Pass this and you are a knight of camalot. Fail and you're no one. You face the most feared of all foes. The ultimate killing machine. You face me. Your challenge is to last one minute in free combat. Grimmond second son of Wessex. Your time starts now. OKAY lots to talk about here. First of all Knight of Camalot must be a great honnor. This dude is the second son of at LEAST a noble family. That being considered no one is huge. However the second son thing could mean he would not inherit his fathers title and this is what Arthur refers to.

ALSO is Wessex suborninate to Camalot? Or are knights just coming from outside Camelot because being a knight of Xamalot is such a big deal. Wessex was a anglo-saxon kingdom and as I have said before we are pre saxon take over in Merlin. HOWEVER the first recorded king of Wessex was named Cedirc and this name is thought to be brittonic rather than saxon giving rise to the theory he was a native of Briton who was later saxonized. Possibly implying a existance of Wessex before the Saxons arrived. It is also implied that for a while he was not a king. SO it's possible Wessex could have been part of Camalot. Also, the test is interesting. See Kings could knight whoever they wanted. Occasionally they would go on a knighting spree of squires just so they could say they had more knights before a battle. Of course as we know in Camalot squires are not a thing. So the normal path of page to squire to knight goes out the window. MY POINT HERE is this test might serve as a replacement for that. Come up with by either Uther or Arthur. Hey you wanna be a knight for us? Sure, pass this test and BOOM knight. It kinda suggests that a LOT of people wanna come be knights of Camelot. (Which seeing how many die is a good thing) So my question is WHY. WHY is this such a plum gig that people want it so bad. Is there some level of renown? Uther does not seem to give out bits of land so it can't be that.

Okay I'm kinda loving the fact that the coat of arms for Wessex is similar to but not the same as the one given to Wessex in the 1300s. Same colors no cross (eliminating Christianity) and what looks like different animals. (but its hard to see)

First reference to the First code of Camalot. Only those of noble blood can serve as knights. Will talk about this a bit more later then reasoning is explained a bit I do find it interesting that they use the word code which was also used for the "code of chivalry"

Gaius: The first code of camalot states that only those of noble blood can serve a knight. Uther created the knights to prtect this kingdom from those who wished to destroy it. He knew he would have to trust each of his knights with his life. So he chose them from the families that had sworn allegiance to him. The nobility Okay first of all considering how he treats commoners and is paranoid fair. SECOND OF ALL HOLY SHIT UTHER CREATED THE KNIGHTS? What was there before? I mean I know he conquered the kingdom. so choosing them from families sworn to him makes sense in that aspect. BUT DID CAMALOT JUST NOT HAVE KNIGHTS? I mean where were the Knights of Medir sooo. Okay I've got this. Knights of Camalot were likely disbanded or something following the abuses of the Knights of Medir. Uther however was like Naw fam I'm bringing them back, there is NO WAY that could happen to me. So he re-formed the knights of Camalot. ALSO does this mean every camalot knight we see comes from Camalot nobility? So Camalot has some part of western illes (Valiants heraldry implied Ireland so Camalot owns part of Ireland?) Or can it be from any nobility? Even if it's not sworn to him? And Northumbria mentioned later is also Camalot but there are still other kingdoms? Okay okay. so either at first knight they were nobles of Camalot but then things spread to other nobles. That's why Uther doesn't seem to know Valient. (Of freaking Ireland) but still invites him to serve as a knight of Camalot. And has knights coming to try to serve from lots of places. OR Camalot is bigger than I thought it was despite just being conquered and Includes some of "the western illes" (Almost certainly Ireland) Wessex, and Northumbria. (While Mercia is somehow its own kingdom) Gonna look for evidence to resolve this as I keep watching the show. because I NEED TO KNOW.

FYI I will not be trying to solve what obscure references like this are about. A LOT ABOUT TOPOGRAPHY CAN CHANGE esp when magic effects things.

Okay LORD of Northumbria. Its looking like Camalot actually does include Northumbria and likley Wessex but not Mercia. (Also thus possibly some least bits of Ireland? Or the other two were from outside Camalot and Northumbria is part of Camalot. I'M KEEPING AN EYE ON THIS. BECAUSE AGAIN I NEED TO KNOW. ANYHOW LETS TALK NORTHUMBIA

It was an Anglo Saxon Kingdom consisting of two other lands that united under the Saxons. (Bernica and Deira both of whom likely existed before the saxon invasion.) Now Deira at least it brought up later so it's likely separate from them. Bernicia is also never mentioned in Merlin SO my thought is Merlin world wise Northumbria is basically the name we are using for Bernicia. Because otherwise it just plain would not exist yet.

Okay in a time before machine made clothing this is a BIG DEAL. See noble did not sew her own clothing. Instead they would hire a tailer who was hired specifically to make custom fitted clothing for the elite. AND if this is true it means Gwen might have been one of them in addition to being a servant. Gwen would likely be far from the only one. But if she was the best that would be noticed. HOWEVER If a noble family was wealthy enough and had an extensive staff, they might hire a tailor exclusively. I don't think Gwen served this role simply because she would not have the time. Gwen however CLEARLY knows how to sew clothing for nobles, as she does it for Lancelot. This implies that she in fact DOES sew clothing for nobles (If not the pendragons themselves) as a side gig. This would likely earn her money. (Further supporting the Gwen's family is more well off than most non nobles theory.) I find it interesting that she keeps being a servant when she has this as a possibility. Does she need to? Or is her loyalty to Morgana and Later Arthur on display here that she chooses to keep being a servant?

Hahaha Okay this position is pretty unique to the Merlin world. Normally patents of nobility would be used and not really checked. ALSO, nobility would have married other nobility People tended to know each other or of each other. Nobles never really had to prove their status otherwise, because their status is known to everyone at the time of their birth.

Gaius: A griffin is a creature of magic. It is born of Magic, Sire and can only be killed by magic. Okay what constitutes a creature of magic? Unicorns are not, thats clear, Are Afancs? Since Merlin did use magic there they could be? Cockatrices are not, however. And trolls are not. In short what counts as a "Creature of magic" Seems to be kinda arbitrary in Merlin. So not much I can extrapolate here.

LIKE I SAID IN PREVIOUS POSTS Gwen's father is not just a typical village blacksmith. And that has implications on the status of Gwens family and their ability to live a higher quality life. (I talked a lot about this in previous episodes)

Okay we have a thank god from Gaius who we KNOW was trained in the old religion. SO either saying god does not mean you are not pagan in Merlin, or he converted or somthing.

Gwen sent at least the helmet off with him. Possibly more. That stuff is not cheap! As in normally only rich nobles could afford it. Also did she send him off with the set that was the best she had? I don't really think Lancelot would accept that. So I think she sent him off with a cheaper suit or helm. UNLESS Lancelot didn't really know how expensive armor was. Which is a big possibility because he didn't know about the code so he might not know about other things in a knights world.

[adhd-merlin]

in all ways but one

Relationships: Arthur/Lancelot; background Arthur/Gwen Rating: Gen Length: 2,500 words Summary: The homosexual side of the classic Arthurian love triangle, featuring jealousy, repressed bisexuals, and Unresolved Sexual Tension. Literally just this:

(x)

Excerpt:

It's all easy enough to ignore, at first. A lingering glance here, a fond smile there – things easy to brush off and hard to notice, unless someone were looking for the signs. Arthur notices.

***

"In all ways but one, Lancelot was a man of honour." — Arthur in episode 4x09 (Lancelot Du Lac)

After Lancelot gets knighted for the third time, and for the first time properly, there is still a certain awkwardness between him and Gwen. From the sidelines, Arthur watches them soldier on and ignore it for the sake of courtly manners, and probably for his sake, too. That which resolve has started, time finishes, slowly wearing away the thin layer of stiff formality between them.

Given he loves them both, Arthur should be glad of their rediscovered friendship. Sometimes he is. Other times, he has to remind himself to be.

***

It's all easy enough to ignore, at first. A lingering glance here, a fond smile there – things easy to brush off and hard to notice, unless someone were looking for the signs. Arthur notices.

He trusts them both with his life, which is why he says nothing. Gwen acts with the ease that only a guilt-free conscience can grant, and Arthur is almost as sure of Lancelot's love as he is of Gwen's. Neither of them would ever cross the line.

And yet.

And yet, it's difficult for Arthur to keep his jealousy at bay when he knows, deep down, that he won that initial fight for Gwen’s heart not by his own strength, but by default. He has tried not to wonder whose side Gwen would be sitting at if Lancelot had not left, but sometimes he falls into temptation. He’s come up with different answers at different times.

***

For Gwen’s first anniversary as queen, Arthur arranges a great feast and a tournament. Not very original, according to Merlin, but Gwen seems pleased. Even more so when Lancelot kneels at her feet and humbly begs her to allow him to fight in her honour. She accepts.

The next day, Arthur fights Lancelot at training. His blows, perhaps, land a bit harder than usual, and he might throw Lancelot on the ground with more force than strictly necessary. Lancelot says nothing. Arthur's right arm is so bruised afterwards that it hurts to lift anything heavier than a goblet of wine for an entire day.

The day of the tournament, Arthur plasters on a smile as he watches Gwen tie her monogrammed silk handkerchief around Lancelot's arm. He thinks of the much humbler favour she gave him, years ago, right before he kissed her for the first time. As they sit on the royal dais, watching the tournament, Arthur has to endure every one of Gwen's soft gasps and sighs of relief as Lancelot works his way through his opponents with single-minded efficiency. He wins the tournament, of course. Arthur wasn't expecting any less.

***

He will not humiliate himself or wrong them by asking them to stop.

And to stop doing what, exactly? They haven't breached any law of propriety, unless perhaps in spirit, in the privacy of their own hearts, which Arthur prefers to remain ignorant about.

At times, Arthur thinks it would be easier to bear it if he did not care for Lancelot as much as he does. He still feels indebted to him for stepping aside, with his customary grace, when it was clear that Gwen’s affections did not lie where Arthur had hoped.

And he understands entirely what drew Gwen to Lancelot – he might not have been a prince, and he's not a king, but he's as valiant a knight as Arthur ever was, true-hearted, chivalrous, and with a spirit noble enough to make up for his humble origins.

He's a few more things besides, things Arthur could never aspire to be – patient, sensitive, modest. Lancelot would not throw his goblet at his servant in a fit of anger, not even one as disrespectful as Merlin. He would not brag about his fighting skills, even though he's the best swordsman Arthur has ever met. If he were to find out Lancelot reads poetry in his free time, Arthur wouldn't be surprised.

Lancelot is, in short, perfect in every way – with the singular exception of being in love with his king's wife, and even this he does with such selflessness that it is almost enough to wipe away the stain of blame. Almost.

Be it as it may, Arthur can hardly fault the man for loving Gwen. He, of all people, knows very well how hard it is not to.

***

Despite Arthur’s best intentions, his worry and irritation start to show. They manifest in mean and petty ways, unbecoming of a friend, let alone a king – picking Lancelot for the most unpleasant rounds of patrol, ignoring him in council meetings, being liberal with criticism and stingy with praise on the training field.

Lancelot accepts it all with resigned obedience, which makes Arthur feel even worse.

***

One afternoon, Lancelot knocks on the door of Arthur's chambers. Gwen isn't there, having left to go explore the market stalls in the lower town. Sometimes, she asks Lancelot to accompany her – not today, it seems.

“Have I displeased you in some way, sire?” Lancelot asks, cutting straight to the point.

Arthur doesn't even lift his eyes from the letter he was writing. “What makes you think so?”

“Your attitude, sire,” Lancelot says, levelly, but with uncharacteristic bluntness. Arthur lifts his eyes then, arching his eyebrows at him. Lancelot meets his gaze, undaunted. “Forgive me, but I must speak the truth. You have always shown me extraordinary kindness, and you have been most gracious in accepting me amongst your knights, despite… what happened in the past–”

“I do not care about your little ruse, Lancelot, I told you,” Arthur interrupts him, jamming his quill in the inkwell. “It's forgiven.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Lancelot looks at Arthur with the same determined expression he wears on the training field, when he's squaring up to an opponent. It is clear he won't be dancing around the obvious any longer. “That isn't what I meant, sire. I do not wish to come between you and the queen.”

Arthur snorts. “Don't be presumptuous. What goes on between Guinevere and me does not concern you.”

“But what goes on between her and me concerns you,” Lancelot says. The withering look Arthur shoots him is not enough to stop him from taking a step forward. “I can see it, sire. I know that Gwen's heart belongs to you entirely, but I fear that my presence here is giving you cause to doubt it, and I do not wish to trouble your peace.” He stands straighter before announcing: “That is why I decided to leave Camelot.”

Panic pierces Arthur’s chest, as sharp and unexpected as a strike from a friend’s sword. “Don't be absurd,” he sneers, trying to mask his agitation with arrogance.

Lancelot maintains his composure. “I'm sorry, sire,” he simply says, and he genuinely looks it.

Arthur springs to his feet so abruptly his chair topples to the floor. Neither of them flinches. He walks around his desk, coming to stand in front of Lancelot. He cannot explain the anger that sweeps through him at Lancelot’s cool resolve.

Suddenly he’s a young prince again, watching the best knight he’s ever met slip through his fingers, and powerless to stop it – an unbearable feeling for a king who’s since grown used to having things go his way. 

“You swore an oath to me and Camelot,” Arthur says, trying to keep his anger from his voice. “To protect us both, and to serve me. Is your word really of so little worth?” A strange leap of association leads him to think of Gwen, left broken-hearted and tearful without so much as a goodbye after a narrow escape from a harrowing ordeal. With a few years’ delay, he feels outraged on her behalf. “Of course, that's your solution to all problems, isn't it, Lancelot? Running away. Guinevere won't be surprised to hear it – you did it once before, after all.”

He can see in Lancelot’s eyes that his words have wounded him, as he intended.

“I did it for you, sire, as much as her,” Lancelot says, quietly. “And it's for the love I bear you both that I beseech you now to release me from my oath.”

Even with a mind clouded by anger, Arthur hears what Lancelot is not saying. “You don't believe she would have chosen me.”

For the first time since he entered Arthur’s chambers, Lancelot's assuredness wavers. “I cannot presume to know what was in her heart,” he replies, but he lowers his eyes as he says it.

“And yet you left.”

“I didn't want to put her in the position of having to make a choice,” Lancelot says, because of course he would be the better man and think of others first, when Arthur was only thinking about himself. “When she confessed her feelings for me, she thought she might not live long enough to see you again.”

Arthur scoffs. “So it didn't count?”

“I only meant that she might not have been as forthright if we had met again under different circumstances.”

“But you don't doubt the truth of what she said,” Arthur insists, like a dog with a bone, not knowing himself what mad urge is driving him to drag the truth out of Lancelot when he's been trying to ignore it for so long.

Lancelot takes a moment to reply. “I believe she meant what she said, at the time,” he says, carefully, “and that she still holds me in esteem, despite what happened. That is all I can hope for. That is more than enough for me.”

“It’s not, though,” Arthur says, shaking his head. “You love her.”

The truth, now bare and undeniable, stands between them. Some emotion, which Arthur cannot name, flits across Lancelot's face at that accusation, like a ripple on the surface of a pond.

“I love her, sire, as much as I love you,” Lancelot says, his eyes as earnest and guileless as they were years ago, when, in a damp and dingy cell, he pleaded Arthur to let him ride at his side on a suicidal mission.

Arthur lets out a single burst of bitter laughter. “No, you don't.”

As he says this, Arthur’s anger evaporates, leaving only hurt in its place. He's not sure what pains him more – that Lancelot's love for Gwen surpasses his commitment to him, or that he would lie to Arthur's face about it.

“But I do, Arthur,” Lancelot protests. “I do.” He looks and sounds distressed, as if Arthur were doing him wrong by not believing him.

Lancelot's eyes search Arthur's face, hoping to find some trace of understanding. There is too much in those eyes – too much trembling honesty, despite his lies; too much devotion, for a man who was threatening to leave a mere moment ago – something too naked, too telling, so much so that Arthur feels the need to avert his eyes, as he did once, years ago, in that dingy cell. When he does so, Lancelot places his hand on Arthur’s face, turning it towards him again – and then, before Arthur can react, he presses his lips to his mouth.

It's a frantic gesture; a last resort. Arthur can tell from the way Lancelot's hand trembles on his cheek, from the desperation with which he pushes his mouth against his, all passion and no grace. Even so, the kiss lasts right up to the point of endurance, as if Lancelot needed Arthur to believe him. Perhaps he does – he is a man of honour; Arthur is certain he hates to be taken for a liar almost as much as he hates to lie.

Arthur doesn’t pull back, but he does not respond, either. He stands still and stiff, merely closing his eyes as he submits to Lancelot's tender assault out of confusion.

At last, the kiss ends. Lancelot takes his hand away and steps back, his eyes downcast, his face pale. Arthur just looks at him, with his mouth slightly open, too shocked to speak.

“Forgive me,” Lancelot says, his eyes fixed on Arthur’s boots. “I… I must go.”

He makes for the door, but Arthur’s hand, moving with no input from his mind, grabs Lancelot's wrist and pulls him back.

“No,” Arthur says, almost choking on the word. “Please. Stay.”

He's not entirely sure what he's asking, if he means ‘don't leave this chamber’ or ‘don't leave Camelot’; he only knows that he means: ‘don't leave me’, that the thought of Lancelot leaving is unbearable, just as it was the first time he did it, when Arthur had to watch the best man he ever met – the first man who ever truly understood what it meant to be a knight, perhaps better than Arthur himself – walk out of his life, leaving him with a feeling of loss he couldn't fully understand.

But Lancelot pulls his hand out of Arthur's grasp. “I'm sorry,” he says. There is genuine sorrow in his eyes.

Lancelot turns and leaves, and Arthur lets him go.

***

That night, Arthur seeks comfort in Gwen's body with an urgency that leads her to ask him what is wrong.

“Nothing,” Arthur lies, with a kiss between her breasts, because he can't very well tell her, ‘Lancelot is leaving us, and it is all my fault.’

Gwen looks unconvinced, but she pries no further.

***

The next morning, Arthur wakes with a feeling of dread, surprised that he's slept at all. He goes through his usual morning rituals with impressive stoicism – he eats his breakfast, reads the patrol report, and has Merlin prepare him for his training session, all the while listening to Merlin's mindless prattle, and never once throwing something heavy at his head.

He walks onto the training field much earlier than usual, expecting to find no one – but someone is already there, practising with a sword on a straw dummy. The distance is too great to make out much of him, but the precision and the swiftness of his movements are enough for Arthur to recognise the man at a glance. He starts walking faster.

“Lancelot,” Arthur breathes out when he's but a few steps away from him.

Lancelot turns. He doesn't bow to Arthur, as he normally would; instead, he wipes his sweaty brow with the back of his hand and looks at him warily. “Sire,” he says. He shifts his grip on the hilt of his sword.

“You're still here,” Arthur blurts out – an observation worthy of Merlin's wit, but the obvious relief in his voice seems to put Lancelot at ease.

Lancelot sheathes his sword. “You were right, sire. I took an oath to serve you and Camelot, so I'll endeavour to do so.” He pauses and adds, hesitantly: “That is, if you'll still have me.”

Arthur smiles at him without even meaning to. “I wouldn't wish you to be anywhere else.”

Lancelot's face clears up. “Then I remain your loyal servant,” he says, with feeling, and he bows.

Of course he is, just as he ever was, and Arthur was a fool to doubt it. The realisation hits him with staggering force, and it's all he can do not to embrace Lancelot.

He claps his hand on Lancelot's shoulder and squeezes it, instead. “Think you can beat me today?” he asks.

“I'll do my best,” Lancelot promises, almost solemnly.

Of course. “You always do, Lancelot,” Arthur says with warmth through the odd tightness in his throat. He backs a few steps and draws his sword, adjusting his grip with a twirl of his wrist. “Come on, then.”

With a happy smile, Lancelot unsheathes his sword.

[fluffywing-e-tarot]

What I am not (Fic Idea)

Summary.

Merlin of Ealdor, son of Huneith, was many things that revolved around Prince Arthur Pendragon. He is not Arthur Pendragon.

Where, Merlin changes all but Afew’s perception into believing he is Prince Arthur Pendragon.

~*~

Leon returned to Camelot after spending time away with his family and managing his land. Leon knew he would need to go out on patrol soon.

“Sir Leon”, a squire greeted him with groomsmen from the stable. Taking the reign as he dismounts

“Prince Arthur requests your presence.”

Leon walks to the prince’s chamber, contemplating the topic. There's the Harvest count. Patrol routes. Potential knights. A new training regiment.

Leon arrived, knocking on the door.

“Enter,” his lord grants. Leon enters the room, ready to do whatever Arthur deems necessary to reevaluate. Standing over the table in the prince's chamber, a map and papers strewn across the surface weren't the blonde prince but the raven hair of the Manservant.

“Merlin?” Leon asks.

Merlin’s head snaps to look into his eyes.

“Leon, you recognise me,” Merlin said. A look of disbelief on his face

“Of course, Merlin,” Leon said

“Close the door.” Merlin looked stern as one of the guards outside the door. They noticed the conversation.

Leon closed the door. Then looked around the room for the blond prince. “ Where is Arthur?”

“Leon, I need you to promise me something,” Merlin said. Blue eyes giving a frigid satire.

“What do I need to promise?”

“What I'm about to tell you doesn’t make it to King Uther.” Merlin started to pace; he looked frustrated.

“I cannot promise you, Merlin. If what you tell me is a danger to Camalot. Then, as her knight, I must tell him.”

“I’m Prince Arthur,” Merlin said. Leon scoffed.

 “That’s impossible. I would have remembered growing up with your scrawny limbs on the training ground,” Leon said 

Merlin continued, “That’s what the entire castle believes.”

“ You don’t resemble Arthur at all. And you’ve worked for him for years.”Leon said the pieces fell into place. Leon whispers, “There’s magic involved.”

Merlin snapped towards the quiet declaration.

“Are you cursed, Merlin?” Leon asks. “You never liked Royalty; must have cursed you.”

“In a manner.”Merlin said, “But it hasn’t affected everyone.”

“Who else knows?”

“Gaius, Gwen, Arthur, and now you,” Merlin said.

“How do you know Arthur knows.”

“I designed it that way,” Merlin mumbled 

“Say again?”

 “It was during Negotiations,” Merlin said clearly. Leon’s stomach dropped.

“This happened when Camelot was in negotiation with another Kingdom?”

“Yes,” Merlin said, slumping.“ They had already known Arthur's appearance and mannerisms. I didn’t want to panic the delegation, so I did something stupid.”

Leon felt his chest tighten and worry that a curse was upon his friend to pose as Arthur. However, both Gwen and Gaius know Arthur is currently the manservant.

 “You Cast the spell.” Leon pointed his blade at Merlin. Merlin didn’t resist; a small trickle of blood fell from his neck. Merlin looked resigned to his fate of death. Leon let him keep talking.

“Two days after the Noble delegation arrived, Arthur decided to go Hunting. At the third watch of the Night, he burst into my room and took me hunting for the morning. While we were hunting, I tripped, and during my recovery, someone attacked, overwhelming and taking Arthur, disappearing before I could follow.”

Leon could tell where this was going.

“I didn't want to be punished for losing Arthur. The negotiations were just starting, and Arthur needed to be present. I cast a spell to have the Bandits and Cort believe me as the Prince.” Merlin bounced his leg. “ I did it in hopes Arthur would be back by now. I can’t lift it until Arthur is safe. I can’t let up now.”

“You would immediately be charged with treason and impersonating royalty,” Leon said. But he understood. Merlin didn’t want to die. No one wanted to die. Merlin had to act dispassionate because that is what was expected of him, not to throw the kingdom into chaos. Leon dropped his sword. He was kneeling before Merlin.

“Sire,” Leon said affectionately, despite Merlin only posing as the prince.“I will find your manservant. I will bring him home.”

“Leon, I can’t in good conscience allow you to undertake such a feat alone.”

“Perhaps not. You must have allies outside the castle. Could your magic lead me to them?”

“Lancelot and Gwain. Those two would be the only people I trust to help.” Merlin said

Leon left Prince Arthur’s chamber with five letters. He dared not touch them for the magic that Merlin enchanted three of them with. He began to walk towards Gaius but was intercepted by a summons to Uther.

“How is Arthur?”

Leon had to remind himself that Merlin was currently Arthur.

“Missing his Mansurvant.”

“That boy can get another one,” Uther said. Leon knowing Merlin’s magic, determined. No other servant is out there with the magic or loyalty to Arthur.

Leon gathered his squier and another knight he knew who thought the private conversation wasn’t entirely adverse for magic to set out on patrol. Leon hoped that he wouldn’t report the use immediately upon seeing it.

“You rarely choose me as your partner, Leon.” Sir Dresden said.

“There is an important task given to me by his highness,” Leon said

“I didn’t hear anything different?“ Hurlburt, his squire said.

Once they left the city, Leon called to halt dismounting.

“What is it?”

“What I am going to tell you must be kept secret.”

“What is it?”

“ An enchantment has been placed on the whole of Camelot.”

They both looked stunned. “Leon, how do you know this?”

“A sorcerer is posing as Prince Arthur,” Leon said. They both laughed at him.

“There is no way Prince Arthur is a sorcerer.”

“King Uther enchanted and marring a troll,” Leon said. They both stopped laughing, remembering that such an alteration to the king’s perception had almost lost the kingdom’s stability and heir.

“I see.” Sir Dresden said. “ and why do you trust this sorcerer?”

Leon didn’t want to reveal that Merlin was the sorcerer, so he said, “The sorcerer gave me the quest to find the real prince.”

“And what must we do to aid you?”

“Continue on patrol. I hope my quest will yield results.”

“I will join you.” Sir Dresden said.

“ So will I.” Hulburt siad.

They mounted up again. Leon told Dresden where to meet on the patrol route, handed over one of the enchanted and standard letters, and demonstrated how to operate the enchanted letter.

He went for Gwaine and handed him the regular letter. Gwaine joined immediately after reading it. They went to the meeting spot and opened the final letter, leading him to the prince.

The battle to reclaim Prince Arthur was short, and he was glad he had accepted Sir Dresden's offer and his squire as there were more than he was comfortable with for the bandits and a sorcerer leading the troop. Lancelot delivered the final blow to the sorcerer.

Arthur was severely injured due to the torture he took. They found a farmer’s house near the woods and summoned Gaius for treatment. Gwain and Lancelot promised to stick around and watch Arthur on his recovery.

When Gaius cleared Arthur to return to the castle, Merlin declared he was going hunting. When he reached the farmhouse, he dispelled the enchantment and roughed himself up—with assistance. 

Merlin's return was appreciated by both Arthur and much of the surviving staff. Merlin’s normal workload was stressing many servants out. Leon smiled when Hespotted Merlin with the wash maids in intense discussion. Uther was none the wiser to what was happening around Arthur.