#the Stranger brainrot is so real right now you guys

[quiverymango]

Learning to be Gentle

*Slams fists on desk* "LET THEM BE FRIENDS!!"

[peppertoastuniverse]

pep reads: geto suguru – long fics

But dang, i didnt realise we were all so thirsty for geto the brainrot is so real

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ

☆ as we walk by cerialilith [AO3] [status: unknown ◦ 29/? chapters] [singledad!geto] [slow burn] [eventual smut!] [nocurses!AU] #sweet, softest sugu

He only loves two things in life: the scent of coffee and his daughter. But perhaps he can make a few adjustments.

— In which the single mother across the hall manages to catch Geto’s eye without him realizing it.

☆Temptations by @peachsayshi [AO3/tumblr] [status: ongoing ◦ 5/6 chapters] [ smut!] [nocurses!AU] #sugu treats you RIGHT #pep MELTED Suguru Geto is a playboy. A man who's had more lovers than he can even count. You've never been in a relationship, not even experiencing a real kiss when you first meet Suguru. But the two of you fall for each other, and you know that he's the one you want to experience all your firsts with.

☆ Breathe Me In by lovelied [AO3] [status: completed ◦ 5/5 chapters] [smut!] #pep love this characterization of Suguru Desperate for distraction, a troubled Suguru Geto began inviting you over each night. It began as a casual arrangement, but over time, you found yourself yearning for him in ways you couldn’t quite explain.

☆The good morrow by @temozarela [AO3/tumblr] [status: ongoing? ◦ 2/? Collection of fics] [smut!] #pep’s comfort fic

You narrowed your eyebrows as you felt your body being jolted, large hands gripping your face, and then your shoulders. Groaning softly, you turned in your sleep, trying to make sense of the voice fading in and out of your brain. It didn’t sound like it was from your dream… It was hushed… low… soft…

It sounded like your name.

aka.

geto finds you after his defection to say goodbye

☆ Mascara by softsellars [AO3] [status: unknown ◦ 5/7 chapters] [smut!] [tw!cheating] [nocurses!AU] [artist!suguru] #complex reader, patient sugu

You've never been a particularly good person, you're self-aware enough to know it. It's your only flaw, and recently you've actually been working to better yourself.

For example: paying for a 30-dollar Uber so you can take your friend home only for her to ditch you for some guy when it comes down to it. Although you’re pissed, you decide to try and make the best of it instead of get into a screaming match with her.

It's an easy thing to do when Getou Suguru is offering you everything to do just that. Everything a party entails: liquor, weed, and sex with a perfect stranger.

And Getou knows perfectly well you have a boyfriend, so it's not like he'll want anything serious.

***Porn with a little plot

☆ Whisper of the Petals by @nanamis-baker [tumblr!] [status: on going ◦ 2/? chapters] [slow burn] [College!AU] #SO SO SWEET #sugu with dumb feelings

A mystery blooms on your doorstep. A breathtaking bouquet of white flowers, a silent whisper of apology... but it's not for you. Delivered under the name of a man so handsome he takes your breath away, the mix-up sets your heart racing.

Fate seems determined to keep throwing you together, and soon you're caught in a whirlwind of chance encounters and undeniable chemistry. It was almost as if it was trying to bring you together. ☆ AFFECTION'S EDGE by @rush-the-stars [AO3/tumblr] [status: completed ◦ 3/3 chapters] [omega!verse] #THE INTENSITY?!

“You’ve got it all wrong,” he murmurs, “but what am I to expect from a stray like you? You’ve lived off scraps and abuse your whole life; of course you don’t know what to do now that I’ve given you food and shelter.” Suguru’s fingers ease up towards your neck as he continues, “a warm bed to lie in. Toys to play with. A collar—so you’ll never be lost again. No one’s ever given you this before, hm?”

*** Suguru tries to tame you.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ

bonus!

☆ Musubi by Penrose_Quinn [AO3] [status: unknown ◦ 2/? chapters] #LOVE THE CHEMISTRY

Then there was a quiet shrewdness in the way he carried himself. You would call it cocky, but this one proved to be more poised and collected on how things would unfold for him. Framed with the anchor of his composure, legs stretched out in front of him but not overly laid-back, and his mind – whatever unfathomable brilliance that dwelt underneath – was unperturbed, self-assured. You wouldn’t claim to have known him entirely though like this, Suguru looked more like himself. “But you won’t disappear,” he concluded. “Not yet anyway.” You gave in to a hum. “You’re really making it tempting for me to leave you hanging on nothing.” Suguru listened, waiting. His pursuit was a game of patience and you chased after the gamble.

Or: the string of each encounter was an entanglement to what brought you closer to him, twisted in each other’s darkness, torn and tied back together throughout the years.

[eightmakesonebraincell]

i have a little request! what happens with mafia mingi & yn? do they ever meet again? if so, how?

same with wooyoung! do they still meet at the convenience store every night? did he bring the others over to introduce reader to them?

oh im curious yeahhhhh

ateez as mafia members pt 2

original post here

pairing: mafia!mingi x reader, mafia!wooyoung x reader, mentions of ot8!mafia

genre: fluff, crack, a continuation of the mafia tropes brainrot-fest

length: 2.1k

c/w: explicit language, violence, weapons, mentions of alcohol, unedited

a/n: thank you anon for requesting (and special thanks @sorryimananti-romantic for validating my writing 🫶) this was only meant to be like a five dot-point thing explaining what happens, but obviously mafia!ateez has me in their chokehold. mafia!ateez in my brain: it's free real estate

mingi

it takes a few days for you to reopen your bar after your fateful meeting with ccg

ccg as in cute coat guy

because quite frankly, that night shook you up a little

mingi most definitely notices your absence

but it's not like he can just check up on how you're doing

not when your bar is closed and he has no real excuse to show up apart from "i was worried about you"

after he reports back to base and rejoins ateez, hongjoong's girlfriend offers to hack into the database and find out what your phone number is

("it'll literally take me like, two seconds")

mingi refuses though because he wants to do things the right way

at least...when it comes to things concerning you

after you reassure yourself that the thugs chasing after cute coat guy aren't going to kill you by association, you feel safe enough to open up the mist again

his leather coat usually sits draped over your chair behind the countertop

originally, you think about washing it before returning it to him

...whenever he shows up you suppose

but then you kind of like the smokey smell of gunpowder with an underlying hint of his cologne that is on the coat

so you leave it as it is

in fact, you might have actually worn it a couple of times

you like how the end of the coat brushes against your calves, how the sleeves fall past your fingertips, how it engulfs your entire frame like an embrace

but mostly, you like how it reminds you of the handsome stranger; who claims he is a good bad guy; who you still do not know the name of

you wonder if he made it back safely that night

you're wearing the coat as you're closing up for the night - it's already well past midnight

you're just about to reach for the last glass on one of the tables when you hear the door to your bar opening

"sorry, i’m closed for the nigh- oh," you pause

it’s ccg

who currently has one leg and arm halfway through the threshold of your door, now frozen mid-step at your words

“if now’s not a good time, i can come back another day?” he starts out hesitantly

“now’s great! good. yes,” you chuckle nervously and try not to be too enthusiastic at his appearance. “now’s good, come in”

you catch his eyes briefly flicker down for a moment before they return to your eyes

then he gives you a soft look and greets you gently, “hi”

“hi,” you return, brain shutting down on you

“you look cute in that,” he jerks his chin down slightly to motion at what he was looking at just moments ago

his leather coat

that you are currently wearing

you squeak in embarrassment, hands fumbling to take it off while you vomit out explanations as to why you’re wearing it

your fingers get caught up in the sleeves

but then he is stepping closer slowly so as not to alarm you, before he grasps the ends of the sleeves and helps tug them off your arms

mingi can’t help but use the opportunity to tenderly hold one of your hands

he’s missed the way your smaller hands fit snugly in his

“did you come back for your coat?” you try to break the silence, because otherwise you are afraid he will hear the heartbeats coming from inside your chest

he nods, “wanted to make sure you were okay, too”

there is a third reason that he does not say

that he just wanted to see you

“i’m okay now,” you reassure him

because he’s back now and he’s safe

he folds the leather coat and places it on the countertop before he says, “i don’t think i ever got your name?”

you tell him then ask him for his

“mingi”

“mingi,” you repeat

he repeats your name in return

“mingi,” you say yet again

“y/n”

you both laugh at the ridiculousness of the whole conversation

“mingi, want to help me close the bar?”

and so you find yourself in his company as you give him easy tasks to do

closing up has always been a tedious job, especially when your body and mind are groggy with fatigue

but with mingi around, an accidental brush whenever you shuffle past each other, a conversation easily flowing between you both, you are awake as ever

even long after all the tables and shot glasses have been cleaned and polished, floors swept, bottles of alcohol reorganised, mingi still has not left

and at some point during the night once you two sit at the countertop to rest your legs, both of you have subconsciously inched closer together in your seats, bodies seeking the warmth and proximity of the other

you are unsure how long you two talk for

but just like that first, fateful meeting with mingi, he stands up to take his leave all too soon

“goodnight, mingi”

mingi buffers for a minute before he decides to do it

he reaches out for your hand, clasping it gently to bring it up to his lips as he presses a light kiss against the back of your hand

and with a goodbye of his own, he turns for the door

except he lingers in the doorway, asking, “will i see you again?”

a smile graces your lips at the irony of the situation and you tell him it's not like you'll be going anywhere; he's free to come visit any time

but you also feel your stomach flutter

because last time, you were the one tugging on mingi’s vest, timidly wondering if that was going to be the last you saw of him

tonight, he is the one unwilling to part ways

not to say that you aren’t either

“i’ll see you around, then,” he says with finality, voice still soft-spoken

and then he leaves

but just mere seconds later you spot it

his leather coat

still folded on your counter where he had placed it earlier

"wait, your coat!" you rush outside with it

mingi is only a few feet away

he could very easily turn around and take it from you

but then he just winks, gives you a tip of his hat and says, "next time," before he's walking away again

you chew on the inside of your cheek to stop the silly grin from blooming across your face

because something tells you that you're going to be hanging on to mingi's coat for him for a while

even after next time

wooyoung

it feels like deja vu

a whole gang of mafia members sauntering into your convenience store like a scene straight out of a movie

admittedly, they are much more pleasing to the eye than the group that was chasing after wooyoung weeks ago

but still

these are several muscular men in tank tops, leather jackets and heavy chained necklaces

your hand itches for the comforting weight of the pepper spray in your purse that wooyoung had gotten you just last week

you haven't had a reason to need it since wooyoung basically lives in your store now

and he always walks you home after your shift

but now seems like a more than good enough time to use it

"you usually work the night shift here?"

a voice causes your eyes to snap up

the man at the head of the group addresses you with a quirk of his brow - it's pierced, you notice

"...yeah," you answer

you wonder if this is your last shift at work and at life

and then just like a repeat of last time, you spot wooyoung's frantic bounce of curls appear from across the street of your store

you pray to the heavens above that he isn't being chased by anyone else this time

because the thought of two gangs crossing paths inside your modest store?

you don't think it's going to look like a store after their fight is through

you see the way wooyoung's eyes widen when he spots the thugs just mere feet away from you and you see a curse form on his lips

you just need to hold out until he gets here

wooyoung will keep you safe

wooyoung will-

"then you must know," the man leans in a little closer to grab your attention, "where i can find-"

wooyoung bursts through the door

"-the super sour gummy worms?" the man finishes

you physically cannot help the words that blurt out of you in disbelief, "the fuck you just say?" 

"hongjoong!" wooyoung's piercing shout interrupts you both

wooyoung worms his way through the gang and you stare incredulously at him before you say, "the fuck did you just say?"

he ignores you in favour of pressing his hands against the chest of the man - hongjoong? - and trying to push him towards the doors of your store

quite unsuccessfully, you must add

"the fuck are you guys doing here?" wooyoung yells

"what the fuck is going on?" you demand

"holy fuck, not even hongjoong swears this much"

"fuck yeah, potty mouth!"

"stop swearing you fucktards!"

one of the men who has been lingering on the edge of the group sidles up to the counter, looking at you with an apologetic grimace

"sorry you have to deal with...this," he shakes his head just as another man comes to join you both, "i'm jongho, by the way"

"seonghwa," the other man introduces himself with a gentle voice

these mafia men are surprisingly kind

and normal

except, you suppose, anyone in comparison to wooyoung would be normal

"are you all wooyoung's, uhh, friends?" you don't know whether they know you know

they chuckle, "yeah, we're his friends. his brothers, too, you could say"

you realise the rest of the men have started to settle down and are standing in a rough semi-circle around your counter

wooyoung is currently grumbling and muttering indignantly under his breath with someone's arm thrown over his shoulders, though it looks more like he's a child being scolded by his father than it looks a friendly gesture

"so to what do i owe the pleasure of a visit from all of you?" you ask them, now that there is no swearing being thrown across the room and you realise they aren’t going to shoot you through the head

"had to see for ourselves who was making our wooyoung all smitten. always sneaking out at night like a tween"

"yunho!" wooyoung hisses and elbows said man in the ribs

except with the height difference, it's more like his hips

it's amusing to see how everyone has the upper hand over wooyoung's brattiness

"am i meeting the in-laws already?" you smirk at wooyoung, "you like me or something, jung wooyoung?"

he flushes bright red and you're quite positive that if you made him take his socks off, you would find him blushing straight down to his toes

"that's it!" he hollers, arms flailing and shooing everyone, "out! out! out!"

you know they can easily resist his pushy hands, but they simply snicker and let themselves be herded towards the doors

"bye, darling!" someone jumps up and down to catch your gaze over the heads of everyone else

"shut up, san!"

yunho, you think you recall his name being, flutters his fingers at you cheekily, "we'll be back soon!"

and then he lets out an indignant yelp when wooyoung slaps his back with a screech, "no, you guys won't!"

you're laughing heartily by this point, unrestrained and very much enjoying their antics

"bye, everyone," you wave them off and then blow wooyoung an exaggerated kiss, "see you later, wooyoungie!"

everyone cackles with glee at the sight of him trying to dig himself into the ground

the sound of their ruckus finally dies down as they exit and walk further away from your store

and then you hear a distant wail

"i didn't get my gummy worms!"

you shake your head with a fond smile and take a seat at the register, but not before setting aside a pack of those ‘super sour gummy worms’ for hongjoong

and then, like always, you look at the clock and count the seconds as they tick past

counting down the seconds until wooyoung comes back to see you

again

[blood-red-hummingbee]

First Day

FANKID BRAINROT :D

~

Joey shuffled uncomfortably in place, trying to keep all attention off of him despite his tall height. He was still completely in shock that he was actually at NRC.

Around him other students chattered excitedly, though a few Pomefiore kids muttered about how much they disliked the P.E. uniform. Joey was just plain nervous. Everyone would be able to tell that the coach was his dad. It’d be all eyes on him and everyone would be aware of just how doofy he was and it’d be middle school all over again. Woman up!

He winced as his best friend’s voice echoed in his head. She wasn’t actually speaking to him, but he could hear Fleur chiding him anyway. You said things were gonna change right? So change ‘em! If people notice you and Uncle Jack, embrace it proudly!

He stood straighter, but as soon as his dad actually stepped onto the pitch, he shrank back down.

The girls (and even the boys) around him…

Were thirsting over his dad!

He turned beet red, ready to claim a stomach ache and hide away. It was horrible. Maybe he should just use his UM and sneak away.

He unintentionally met his dad’s eyes. He could see in his face that he heard the kids too, and knew he’d be facing the worst punishment if he left… Disappointment. Understanding, and support of course, but still. 

He whined softly, steeling himself for enduring the horror. People.

“Oi,” His dad grouched, immediately silencing the kids around him. Man, Joey had to learn how to do that. “You’re here for exercise, not to gossip. This is no less a class than history or math.”

A few of the students muttered stilted apologies.

His dad nodded once. “It’s the beginning of the year, so I’m not gonna push you too hard, but I do expect effort.”

~

The class itself was easy. The Howls lived on a large plot of land, acres and acres. Despite the fact that Joey wasn’t the most buff bro in the gym, he was no stranger to exercise.

No, it wasn’t the class that was driving him crazy, it was the whispers. The other guys in the locker room were staring at him as he changed back into the regular uniform, definitely noticing the similarities between him and his dad. His ears were pinned against his head, and if he were still a puppy, his tail would be stuck between his legs.

He wanted to go home.

“You,”

He jumped at the sudden voice behind him. It was another Savanaclaw kid, and Joey could only tell by their uniform. He had no idea who they were, but their stance was wide. Glancing around, it looked like no one was going to intervene if anything happened.

“You’re the coach’s kid, ain’t you?”

Oh no. Here it comes. He nodded, feeling smaller than the other guy despite being taller.

“Man, that is so cool.”

…What?

“Is he that intense all the time?”

“Uh…”

The conversation, if it could be called that, seemed to prick the ears of the students around them.

“Is he?”

“I bet he’s real tough at home!”

“Nah, he’s definitely totally different at home, that’s how these types are!”

“What’s his phone number?”

“What?”

“...Where’d he go?”

~

Joey couldn’t breathe. Too many people, too many questions. Too many questions that even if he’d had an answer he wouldn’t want to give. They’d probably hound him later, but for now he was clear. By the time he released his Signature Spell and became visible again, he was in the Teachers’ Lounge. He was fairly certain he wasn’t supposed to be in there now that he was a student, but he didn’t leave. He’d visited his dad at school in the past, he was familiar with the lounge. It was the only place in the school he could say he was. He was on the verge of an anxiety attack, he needed familiar.

Thankfully no other teachers were in the lounge but his dad, pulling out his lunch.

Wordlessly, Joey sat next to him, leaning into his arm. His dad didn’t say anything either, even when Joey snatched some food from his plate.

~

@screamintoad, @babyghoul138, @skriblee-ksk, @gimmeurmoneyagh @twtysevapr

IF ANYONE WANTS TO BE TAGGED FOR JACKROSE FANKID CONTENT LEMME KNOW <3

ANYWAY I HAVE A FEEL FOR HIS VOICE (LUNA TOO) BRING ON THE INTERACTIONS! (PLS?) <3

[damagedintellect]

Dazai Osamu x reader

💌 Reading into the palms of isekai bullshit: Chapter 4 💌  

Summary: You were no stranger to isekai bullshit. It’s not like you had a problem with it. The genre took over the anime scene for years now but you try to stay away from thinking about how you would handle the situation. The last time you thought about inserting yourself into your favorite show you wrote a 100k word xReader fic for your favorite characters and you didn’t want to spend all your time consumed by the brainrot again. Never again, you promised yourself that was the last time you’d let the devil on your shoulder win. You clicked on chapter 1 to start the adventure over again but when you opened your eyes and saw Dazai O-FUCKING-samu getting choked by Kunikida you honestly hoped it was a dream.  

Notes: Another isekai so I can play around with BSD like dolls.  

💌 Word count: 1,970 💌 <= Previous Chapter | Next Chapter =>

The next few days will be boring for you since Dazai was taken by the port mafia. Being a non combatant also kind of sucked because it meant that you were basically useless on the front lines. You mostly spent your time doing office work and or following Ranpo around like a lost puppy getting him snacks whenever he wanted. Honestly with how bored you felt it seemed like he was rubbing off on you. Although you still didn’t forgive him after that last stunt. The sugar fiend was so pleased with himself when he saw you that morning. Although you should have expected as much.

 Atsushi was concerned over Dazai’s disappearance but you spilled the beans that he was taken on purpose to try and figure out what was up with the bounty on his head. That actually made him feel worse but before he could ask you too many questions Ranpo pulled you away leaving Atsushi alone to run errands with Yosano. You sighed seeing how satisfied Ranpo was as if he was a major hero stopping a great calamity.

 “Still doesn’t make up for giving Dazai the drawing but I’ll accept the apology.”

It wasn’t long until Kyouka was taken in and you were once again pushed to the side. Now you think you understand how Ranpo feels about knowing the ending of books. Again you stayed out of the fun only dropping your two cents when absolutely necessary. Atsushi asked if you wanted to tag along but you begrudgingly turned them down. Meaning you’d miss out on getting crepes later. You’d have to go out on your own time to get some. Which gave you an idea but it was still a day too early or was it? You remember Dazai pretended to be held longer but when did he actually sneak back? As the day came to an end you took your leave making sure no one else was around. You relaxed against his door in the standard cool guy position and started knocking.

“.... . -.-- , / .-- .- -. -. .- / --. . - / -.-. .-. . .--. . …”

“Hey, wanna get crepes”

He’d understand the morse code right? You had to look up a chart to figure it out. A brief moment passed with no answer. Oh well, you would still go to get a crepe. You were about to leave when you finally heard a very soft knocking from the otherside.

“.-- .... -.--”

“Why”

You had to pause, looking up what he said before you smirked to yourself. “If you do, I won't tell anyone you came back already.~” You said it in a sing-song way like it wasn’t a soft threat. There was a short beat before the door quickly opened and he pulled you inside. You yelped as you stumbled backwards but he put his hand over your mouth pulling you closer so he could close the door before anyone else saw. “Now what’s the real reason?” He seemed slightly irritated that you disturbed his peace. 

Ever since you came into the picture it feels like you can see through him and he's not used to someone else being able to do that since Chuuya. He's still wracking his brain trying to figure out how you do it because it still doesn't add up. Especially since Chuuya minded his own business for the most part and you've practically made it your goal to win this game that Dazai swears you both are not playing. You saw his palm twice, how can you know him like the back of your hand? He’s done his research and that’s not how palm reading works at all! You shouldn’t be able to get names from his palm or very specific details the way you’ve been. When he talked to Ranpo before Kyushu he was so sure that you weren’t reading palms at all but still it couldn’t be an ability so it had to be a secret third thing that he still hasn’t found out about. Disappointed would be an understatement for how deranged he felt when Ranpo came back and you saw through his trap. There was only one other person who has managed to counter his predictions in this way and he’s sure you are not a demon like he and Fyodor are. So what gives?

“Well Atsushi took the new girl for crepes and it sounded good. I can’t ask Ranpo out of spite. Yosano would rather get a drink. Kunikida doesn’t eat sugar past a certain hour and actually I didn’t even think about asking Kenji now that you mention it.” You played dumb making up random excuses as neither of you moved to change the position you were in. You were still being held slightly into his chest and leaned back far enough to need Dazai’s hold on you to stay balanced “Besides I figured you’d wanna get the taste out of your mouth after being reunited with your ex. I assume all you’ve had was cheap booze and canned crab?” He only frowned as you glanced over to his lazy set up. It looked like he was genuinely weighing out his options before his sinister smirk rested on his lips. He needed to gain the upperhand somehow. "Admit that you missed me and I'll go."

"What?" You were dumbstruck. You were the one with leverage. It was you who was supposed to be making demands not following orders. "You heard me just tell me that you missed me." He sneered, "I'm just trying to help you be more honest-"

"I missed you." Your cheeks were warmed by the confession but you held firm with no hesitation. Your voice was soft yet strong as if it was intended for his ears only. Like it was supposed to be your little secret.

Dazai was in a state of bewilderment, astonished that you actually said it back to him. He really didn't expect you to, and he didn't think it would be so genuine. He marveled at you for a while, for once he was at a loss for words. Your eyes held an unwavering conviction over the sentiment that he would rather not think about. Originally he was trying to garner more control over the position you placed him in but now it appears he's the one who played himself. He lowered his gaze letting his bangs shield his vision as he shifted you upright. Your unwavering stare made him tense. He wasn't used to this feeling of being uncomfortable. You really were his belladonna.

"Okay." 

Dazai sounded far away from himself. You desperately wondered what was running through his head. He started unbuttoning his vest as he opened his closet to pull out some more casual attire. He ran his hand through his hair pseudo slicking it back throwing on a pair of glasses. By the end Dazai looked like a different person as you went to get your reward. When you got there he ordered for you but you paid knowing that you were the one who invited, or well, forced him to come it should be your treat. Of course it was no surprise to you that Dazai had ordered you both the “Romeo and Juliet” which was chocolate ice cream, with freshly cut strawberries, two pieces of pocky, whipped cream and drizzled with chocolate sauce. You wonder if Dazai got it because of the flavor or because of the name because he couldn’t pass up the double suicide reference. Even if he didn’t order for you it’s the one you would have chosen because the one you wanted to try was already sold out and it was the next bestseller.

It was golden hour, painting the sky in beautiful yellows, oranges and hints of reds and purples. There seemed to be less people out and about right now which was good for Dazai. It also meant that you and him got to share this moment completely unbothered. Watching the sun set over the city and eating something sweet would be the perfect end to the peace. You had maybe a day or two before the guild showed up on your doorstep and you weren’t looking forward to the week of chaos when Q gets released into the world. Dazai had been unusually quiet but you didn’t mind just the fact that he came with you was enough. As you ate the last bite you noticed some of the ice cream dripped on the back of your hand. You were about to wipe it away with a napkin when Dazai finally spoke, grabbing for your hand.

“If I profane with my unworthiest hand

This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this:

My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand

To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.”

He licked it up, placing a gentle kiss to where it used to be giving you a playful look. Little does Dazai know you actually played Juliet in highschool so without missing a beat you shifted your hands as you spoke.

“Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,

Which mannerly devotion shows in this;

For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,

And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.”

He didn’t seem that surprised as you continued the scene if anything he hummed with enthusiasm. “Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?” Dazai smirked, leaning into your personal space. You wonder how far he’ll go “Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.”

“O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;

They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.”

Dazai interlace your fingers giving you eyes that pierced your soul. Were you guys playing chicken right now? Was this nerd chicken? If this was you didn’t want to lose but no matter what you did, it would be his win since you already took the bait. Savvy as always, he has tied you to a stake you cannot fly. 

“Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.” You had to come up with something otherwise you won’t hear the end of it.

“Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.” Dazai brought his free hand up to your cheek. You watched as his eyes closed as he started closing the distance. You quickly placed the kiss on his cheek instead of his lips. You whispered against his ear before pulling away “I already told you, saints do not move, and I am not that easy.” Implying that you weren’t a saint you grinned smugly.

He exhaled out of his nose “No you are not.” He matched your smile and stood up. Dazai was about to let go of your hand but you tighten your grip “Who said you could let go?” You would yield this round but that didn’t mean you were going to throw in the towel. You wanted to make it clear that you were enjoying the game. “Then after you my little belladonna~”

“With pleasure my little snake.” It didn’t have the same ring as mackerel but you tried.

You held hands all the way back to the dorm. The coast was clear but who knows for how long. You let go of his hand when you were outside of his room. “I won’t tell, scouts honor.” you held out your pinky to him. Everyone knows that pinky promises hold the most gravity in the court of law. After he shook on it he softly but swiftly made his escape.

You hummed to yourself “Parting is such sweet sorrow that I shall say goodnight till it be-” you stopped, he wouldn't hear you so what’s the point “A few days from now.” You sighed, retiring to your room as well.

What you didn’t know was that Dazai did hear it from the other side of the door and he was smiling to himself.

[elvenbeard]

V Then and Now

Yes, I'm gonna jump on the bandwagon too! XD Even though I feel like Vince really hasn't changed much at all, but AMM defintiely gave me an opportunity to take better pics of him :D Because poses <3 and subtle expressions <3 "look at" feature, my beloved <3

2022/12/18

This was the first pic of him I ever took in Photomode where you could actually see his face XD I had taken scenic pics mostly until then, or him just standing somewhere and looking into the distance. I remember that it felt weird to take pics of him at first... I figure, since it's a first person game and you don't really see your character's face up close that much, it was always like "uh, hello sir, sorry for approaching so closely" initially xD he felt a little bit like a stranger. Glad I'm over that now :D

I'm a chronic screenshot taker though, and so this is not technically his "oldest" pic I have. That would be this:

2022/11/27

The usual "oh no, I like this guy... better take shots of all his sliders real quick so I don't lose him if I wanna play him again!"

But my most favourite early pic of him that I shared with everyone back then was from the 6-month-montage:

Idk there is just something about it that really... captured his essence in a sense and the brainrot started XD Little cocky bastard coming into his own finally but still has to hype himself up in front of the bathroom mirror bc on the inside he's just a scared kid really xD And that hasn't changed until now - yeah I can say with relative confidence that his personality did not change much, just became more well-rounded over the months, he has a very well-developed backstory now, and I keep getting to know him better and better as I'm slowly going through my second playthrough xD

2023/07/18

He's still an edgy bastard, but he got his tattoos upgraded to something fitting his vibes better :3 His fashion sense is still soemthing that stands out, even more so now than it used to! That is probably the biggest change from that early shot, his wardrobe fitting his corpo background and personality more (cause first time around I was so caught up in story stuff and didn't really know yet what options there were in terms of clothing and styles... so I just put him in that random Wraiths jacket for a large part of my first playthrough xD I still like that style of jacket a lot, and him just running around shirtless under his coats and jackets bc gotta show off those tats :3).

2023/07/01

I am very very happy with his looks and as of right now I'm not really planning on changing anything big about his physical appearance. He is and always was (and always will be) equipped with very little cyberware, he has tattoos that fit him now (although I might expand on them in the future for a potential post-2077 appearance). I still wanna do an updated wardrobe post and mod him some custom top surgery scars, but I liked him a lot from the start and feel like if I changed him too much it wouldn't be my Vince anymore xD

[oleander-neruim]

Hello hello!! Absolutely pumped for the Myth’s Voyage AU :DD!!

What made you pick certain characters for certain roles? I’m particularly interested by Owen as Antinous 👀👀

Bare with me this is gonna be a doozy

I'll be honest. It all started with me being real emotionally attached to p!Will & me falling down a rabbit hole of associating the song "Open Arms" with him because- even if I'm not fully read on p!Will's story & character- the way I've come to view him is a relatively forgiving and optimistic type of person. So him as Polities came natually.

I also have a frequent habit of doing a thing where when I associate one character to one song/character of a musical, I start to try and figure if there's way to fit in other characters.

I believe what came next was Sausage and if I recall correctly, that was due to 1. Me just liking Sausage all together and 2. Me seeing him as the most "Captian-Like" guy in pirates. Also revolving around headcanons, others' interpretations, and maybe an artist or two's ways of drawing him. After that, Joel & Hermes as Penelope and Telemachus came pretty easy. I've also played around with previous ideas of "What if Joel was in Pirates SMP" and added in my constant Empires Brainrot ™️, that all just fell into place.

I believe Lizzie was my first established God cos. Giant fish/ocean associated person, yk. And then Jimmy as Polyphemus due to fishy relations and then I think Fwhip was actually my next one due to the "silly & unhinged" vibes I got from Epic Hermes. Then with a lot more stubborn brain storming, more and more gods fell into place as I started following an Empires Season 1 pattern with the Gods

Krow was also a fun one to workshop in cos I also don't know much about his Canon character but what I do know & just the fascination I've gotten with him, I thought he fit the role of Eurylochus pretty well. Mostly on the side of more of a survivor when it comes down to a "You vs Me" mentality & leaning more on aggressive tactics when it comes to handling certain situations. He is one of the ones I'm certain doesn't fall into complete Canon-type of personality, but I like how my au's Krow is a lot.

Now. The fun situation with the suitors and Ithica in general.

I can explain a bit further if anyone's interested, but the way my storyline worked out is that there's actually no Herons that are part of Sausage's crew in the story. They're either still on the Faction Isles or traveling elsewhere. Having said that, when I came around to figuring out Antinous, it was right when I was finding out very bare-bones about him. And given that the Heron characters will ideally be characters shown on "Ithica" I was working to see if anyone would fit that roll.

Having said that, Antinous was noted down in my "Working-Out" list with the note of "Mr. Steal your wife and kill your son" and while discussing my character plans with my partner, we started to joke about Antinous being Owen. Given her more player-esque personality, at the time I figured it'd be a decent fit- or at least a place holder- for a character who I started to think was just someone wanting to court "Penelope".

However, thinking more on it & finding out better how Antinous plays in this story, I started getting more invested in the idea of Owen still being him. The idea of Owen becoming a villain, manipulative with his charm and almost vindictive in her motives just started to appeal more and more to me.

When this takes place, it's 20 years since the rough-end of Pirates SMP, following Epic the Musical's timeline. A lot can change in a person in 20 years. Seeing the Factions fall, loves in your life die or disappear, people coming into power that you feel either don't deserve it or are strangers who don't understand all that's happened here or you feel are too weak irresponsible to handle it. It can grate on a person, certainly.

P!Owen is, once again, another character I'm unfortunately not fully familiar with, though that may change if i have a chance to watch his pov in the future. And who knows, maybe I'll workshop the story, change e!Owen's personality or motives, maybe even choose someone else entirely to fit the role.

But as it stands, the idea of e!Owen, 20 years in the future with heavens knows how much baggage and pent up anger and frustrations left on his shoulders starting to get desperate or almost hungry even for some sort of control or power or just even a sense of stability in her life just seems to be a very interesting & fun-to-work-with storyline to me.

Thinking about seeing Owen getting aggressive and animalistic and breaking that carefully-crafted facade of charm and control when it comes to fighting and trying to kill someone just. It's so interesting and fascinating in my mind, you've no idea.

And, again, I'm awfully weak to villain Owen nonesense so that certainly doesn't help.

There you have it. My essay & a half summary over some of my reasonings.

Again, things are always subject to change and sometimes I get a little Silly with my trains of thoughts but, hey, it'll be fun either way. If you're interested in me trying to explain my through process for more characters, feel free to ask, I just figured I'd keep this as short as i can physically manage. If it comes off as a bit rambling or you want me to clear anything up, you're always welcome to ask. It's technically super late for me so my writing compression might be a bit off.

Tl;Dr, I zone out to music and play "Song Association Games" too much & Owen as Antinous started off as a silly joke but now it's eating my brain whole so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[sketchybardlings]

the brainrot continues (ref: this post)

since my dysgraphia is worse when I'm writing by hand I'll try to note down what all of this says (plus some extra stuff i couldn't fit on the page)

the basic premise of the Growing Pains au is that Headspace (and by extension Stranger) keep going on after the events of the good ending. even if you heal a great deal your old coping mechanisms and traumas don't just disappear. if anything they evolve to suit your new environment/life. they change. they Grow. which is where our friend Stranger seems to be right now. he's dealing with one of the worst things that can befall a young person(?) such as himself, Puberty. don't get me wrong its traumagenic ill-informed dream creature puberty but that's what it is regardless. with his specifically he's aging at the same rate as Sunny is himself, although he's 4 years behind his dreamer, making him 14 and Sunny (and the rest of the young faraway crew) 18, or 17 going on 18 if your being pedantic. this is mental and physical, maybe even metaphyical if you count how headspace is reacting to it.

on the physical side he's a clear amalgam of 12 year old and 16 year old traits, both of which taken from the last time sunny saw basil before the gap, and the first time he saw him after (+ notable traits from current day Basil/Sunny, like their scars, real and fake). Sunny doesn't really have to much of a concept of what basil looked like in the in-between (of how he looked for that matter) so headspace definitely has to fill in some gaps to try and give stranger a useable form, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. a lot of this trial and error leads to a lot of stretch marks(sorry about how badly drawn they were in the last post, they were a last minute addition), mostly on his arms and legs, straight up and down, making his very much 12-ish year old torso look a bit dwarfed next to his elongated limbs. don't think headspace has really figured out a way to make his torso any bigger, not without severely fucking up his organs in a way that cant be pleasant, so it seems to be waiting until he's big enough for the 16 yo one to make sense, but he's gonna look real weird in the mean time.

as for the mental its... an adjustment. he and Omori always knew a lot, had a lot of power and influence and experience, but they were still always mentally 12 yo, frankly so was Sunny after the incident. so once The Truth was out and Sunny started living his life again all of them kinda got shunted back into growing as people again. Sunny is overwhelmed, Omori is in denial, and Stranger is confused but accepting. what about the outline thing tho? that is headspace's doing. part of the reason Stranger didn't have outlines in the first place was to take away his recognizability, and the reason why everyone else had purple outlines was to tie their identities back to Mari, the fantasy of headspace is for her afterall, and what else to define everyone else but her signature color. this has not remained in future years tho, most everyone in headspace gaining their own signature hues, not excluding Stranger. he's started to gain very faint ones all over his body, getting more opaque in some areas, concentrating most on his eyelashes and flowers (his flower crown that fell off and settled on his shoulders). not sure witch color i want them yet, maybe even in the au that may not even be set yet, its not like he can rely on basil's color anymore, let alone mari's or any other person's. i'll keep tinkering on it and see what i can come up with. so that's what i have for the Growing Pains au, i still have a lot more on my mind and a lot of what ive said here is subject to change, so if you guys have any questions about this i would LOVE to hear them seriously. my askbox is open.

[sege-h]

23 and 28 for Storm!

8, 12, 15 and 26 for any other oc(s) of your choice!

23. how would you describe their voice? can they sing?

I am absolute shit at describing voices HSGDSHDH That's why it's hell to find any VCs. I can hear the kinda voice I want in my head but can't describe it. So I'm gonna sorta cheat and refer to Johnny Yong Bosch as Vash-- the way his voice can go from soft to serious to chaotic/kinda maniacal pretty much on a dime. That's how Storm's is

He can sing! Whether he sings good or horribly depends entirely on whether he's trying to annoy someone with it or not

28. how do they show that they care about someone? how do they express that they don’t like someone?

He'll actually respect what you ask of him 😂

The difference between someone he's just met asking him to stop his shenanigans, and someone he cares about asking the same is night and day. He doesn't like upsetting those he cares about.

There's so many other ways because when Storm cares he cares A Lot, but this is one of the more subtle ones that strangers might not be able to pick up on because of Course you stop acting like a fool when someone asks you to

The 'don't like' one is harder to answer because Storm snarks anyone they meet. But if he decides he dislikes someone then that snark gains a certain edge to it. He purposefully starts poking and prodding with his words, aiming to be an absolute nuisance at best, and ruin someone's day at worst

8. do they have a nickname? who gave it to them? if it’s not derived from their real name, what’s the story behind it?

Sharp. His real name is Ashen/Ash. But during the war against Eggman, the Resistance faction he frequently went up against nicknamed him Sharp. It was easier to signal out that he's coming in with a raid than to be like "It's that wolf guy!" or "It's that guy with the sharp metal arms!" etc

He doesn't really mind it so it kinda stuck.

Also bc this is my current brainrot I'm gonna cheat and answer for my Pokemon AU Kamina too. His nickname is Beep and he only allows his siblings to use it. It came about when his voice started cracking, and little Claire started calling him Beep because of it. He's secretly endeared by it but gets absolutely embarrassed about non-family finding out.

12. how long have they been around? do you know their birthday? is their birthday the day you made them or another day? what do they think of celebrating birthdays?

Outside of universe? Atos has been around since 2011. In universe? He's been around for about 50 years. Technically. Given he either dies or gets stasis'd in his late 20s

Idk his exact birthday I just know it's somewhere in August.

He likes celebrating other people's birthdays, but is pretty neutral on his own. He doesn't think much about it.

15. how big or small is their family? who did they live with growing up? do they live with anyone now?

Sharp's family is Just Right for his standards. Growing up he lived with his mother and father-- at least until he ran away at the age of 11. After that he was on his own for the remainder of his childhood

Now he lives with what remains of the resistance faction he used to fight against-- and more importantly to him, with Percy, Riley, and Dahlia (though he takes a while to accept/appreciate that last one)

Given he used to wish for even just one person to call family, three entire people is more than he ever expected

26. how do they move? are they clumsy? light on their feet? do they use mobility aids?

Zel is kinda animalistic in his movements. He walks on two legs, sure, but if he's not standing or alert he has this kinda slouch to him. Not too much, but enough that it can be noticed. He can drop down on all fours at a moments notice, though he's quick either way. He uses his tail as a sort of fifth limb, either attacking with it or using it to hold someone up-- whether it's gentle or not depends entirely on who it is.

[lqfiles]

CHAPTER 21 WE CHEEREDDD!!!! um also WHAT grace me wif the date of ur birf pleek. (if ur comfortable to do so ofc) so like summer..omgg IT IS SO FUCKING HOT IN TURKEY IT WAS 30 DEGREES CELSIUS TODAY LIKE WHAT. THE. FUCK. but other than that my summer is going pretty good i think im entering my working era idrk....also i fully agree that yangyang shouldn't be allowed in establishments without a gf like wait I GOT AN IDEA Sharks (tumblr user lqfiles), we require 500,000$(a forgettable cameo of being 2yangs gf), and will return the money in 125% interest(a kiss) within 12 hours. Please contact us at ilove𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴yang@gmail.com 🤵 why is 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 becoming an addiction i cant help it I HAVE TO 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴. OH MY GOD ALSO??? I NEVER TOLD U WHAT HAPPENED W THE THUMBS UP GUY. we literally talk like.. idk id average it down to like 15 mins a day right.. but like the more i talk the more i remember why hes a PAST crush. like my friend rlly wants me to date him cos we'd be cute and all but he just feels so immature i dont know... like i dont want to feel like im dating a 6th grader. ALSO. ok so im coming out yawl. i Kinda. like his friend BUT OKAY HEAR ME OUT i havent told ANYYY of my friends about him because theyd skin me alive or something and idk why i even LIKE HIM. i think its smt like emotional attachment or something. ive deadass gotten back into painting and pottery because of him like he makes me want to Create Art. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ??? BECAUSE I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW WE'D EVEN BE FRIENDS. LIKE IF WE STARTED DATING I THINK IT WOUD BE LIKE.... strangers to somewhat enemies to friends(?) to lovers like what... -🐇

my birthday is actually in 50 minutes from now :P me and haechan are birthday twins, are you jealous? 👀

broooo i can only imagine how warm it is in any middle east country, i remember this time around last year i was in saudi arabia and i was HEATING UPPP, it may not be turkey but it’s close kinda! anyways i love that for you, get that bag sis, we BOTH might be entering our working era 😝

ILOVEFRWAKYANGSHDKDJ WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS, very tempting offer tho… i guess i’ll take it and you can be yangyang’s official girlfriend, NOW RUN ME MY KISS AND MONEY 🤦🏽‍♀️ also PLSSS I LOVE RHE BRAINROT SO MUCH like i always giggle at those freaky insta posts like i literally saved this pic today lmaooo, like me a real freak 🤫🤫

OOOOHHHH THIS TEA IS CRAZYYYY NOT YOU FALLING FOR HIS FRIEND….. what do you even do in that situation 😭😭😭😭 i’m glad you’re figuring out you’re feelings for the first guy tho, you won’t have to waste your time trying w him anymore. as for the second one ooouu ngl friend, that might get some judgement but genuinely, if it makes you happy, why should you care about what these others think? i think you should figure out what his feelings for you are while also trying to figure out if you rlly RLLY like him and if that’s the case just try to act on it? IDK BUT I SUPPORT YOUR RIGHTS AND WRONFS DONR WORRY SIS….

[rikiws]

PICK UP (LINES). ꩜

▸ non-idol!jake x gn!reader ┆ strangers to lovers (?) general down bad-ery [fluff]

꩜ All you knew was that a really cute guy had just asked you for a map. Jake however, had a much longer story to tell.

ps: the Jake brainrot is real guys stay safe out there

. . .under the cut ⊹ (1.0k words)

Jake saw an angel.

The weather seemed to change itself just to accommodate you. You: just one of the many people waiting for the bus to arrive, but to Jake, you were so much more. You were sent from the heavens, he was sure of it; a carefully sculpted ivory statue brought to life by the gentle hands of Aphrodite herself- his own Galatea. 

The winds seemed to bend at your will, to send a warm breeze exactly where your hair could reflect the afternoon sun with ethereal sparkles, and your eyes seemed to twinkle along in unison, synchronised like a starry symphony orchestra. Jake had only seen you for the first time today, yet it felt as if he had been in love with you for aeons. It wasn’t love at first sight- no, Jake had always adored you, in all his other lives, in all the other universes, this was just his moment of epiphany in this one. His vision tunnelled to only fit you, blatantly ignoring the looks of confusion followed by the mischievous jeers of his 6 other friends. Jake was much too busy to be paying attention to them. He was much too busy staring at you. Only when a hand moved over his eyes, drawing a wall between you and himself, and only when Jake indignantly sent a glare to the perpetrator: a grinning Sunghoon, did Jake finally snap out of it- but not before feeling incredibly embarrassed about it.

It didn’t help that he was now sat on the bench beside you, an awkwardly large distance apart, with and equally awkward silence, and his wretched group of friends snickering at him from a safe distance. Of course, his best buddies couldn’t possibly let Jake just send you heart eyes from afar. It was their humble duty to not-so-subtly usher him towards you, sending him a few harsh smacks on the back just for good measure. They knew their friend, he’d do awesome.

Yet when he gathered what little courage he had left to send a glance your way, only to meet your already searching eyes, Jake felt as if he’d vomit out his heart right then and there. His eyes nervously shot away from your general direction, completely failing to notice your flustered expression that seemed to match his perfectly. Jake had so much to say, so much to ask you: What was your name? What job did you do? Did you know how absolutely adorable you were? Did you like guys with puppy faces? Were you willing to get married to him immediately? 

“Do you have a map?” Jake swore he heard a cackle in the distance. Out of all the terrible options, he just had to pick the worst one. 

“A map? Me?”

Jake gulped. Even your voice was a thousand times prettier than he could have ever imagined: comforting, like receiving a warm bear-hug- preferably one by you. Jake had the agonising thought of you saying his name with that voice of yours, the consonants rolling off your tongue as if you were made to say his name and only his.

“Er, you okay?”

You asked, sheepishly, and even the way you clumsily refused to meet his eyes seemed so endearing to Jake that all he wished to do at that moment was to cup your cheeks and tell you how insanely cute you were. But he had to stay focused, especially when he was on the brink of humiliating himself in front of the love of his life of five minutes. Jake jerked his head up and down to nod, propping up two thumbs-ups that prompted a small giggle out of you. He lost his mind once more.

He must have been clinically insane when you scooted closer towards him, a small map unfolded on your lap.

“You wanted a map right? Here.” “Yeah- hey that kinda looks like a duck!” He circled a small cluster of roads that indeed looked like a waddling duck. Jake’s smile faltered once he realised what he’d just said. He swore he could hear sad trumpet noises echo in his mind, so much for acting suave and mysterious. Jake had failed that from the second he laid his eyes on you. Yet when he looked up dejectedly, fully expecting you to be wearing a judgemental frown that would have still looked incredibly pretty on you, only to find you with gleaming eyes and a smile he wanted to carve into his brain forever.

“Right?! No one believes me when I say it! And this one looks like a frog, doesn’t it?” “Oh my god you’re right.”

Jake’s nerves melted off as he continued to point and giggle at strangely shaped streets with you, though the warmth in his heart only grew more and more at every second of your interaction. He could have sat at the bus stop forever, just retelling silly stories and finding shapes in an over-complex map, as the buses would pass by at each stop. But then you peered at your phone, checking the time and letting out a shocked gasp before turning to face Jake once again.

“Right, so where are you headed?” A bus appeared from the corner of the street, slowing down to a halt at the very stop the both of you were sitting at. If he wanted to do anything, he had to do it fast. But Jake didn’t even have to think, the words fell right out of his mouth, as if it were the dialogue of a cliché rom com.

“Well, I would say that I got lost in your eyes, but I found my way to your heart at the end.” Judging by your bashful smile, and the way you hurriedly pressed your phone into his hands, Jake would say that he absolutely nailed it.

꩜ want to read more? check out my masterlist

[magicalmanhattanproject]

quick little ficlet thing for @betweenlands Apocaholics au bc I have brainrot for people encountering the Joe Hills Difference for the first time

As soon as the lava comes down, the first thing Sam sees is a blue-shirted figure jumping right in. He checks his communicator, which he really needs to do more often.

[joehillssays tried to swim in lava]

Sam scrolls back through the notifications trying to see when the new person joined, but his entire screen is filled up with the same message. 

[joehillssays tried to swim in lava]

[Awesamdude: when did someone new join?]

[Tubbo_: no idea it’s been like this all morning no one can backread far enough]

Sam flicks the lever for the bridge, downs his fire res potion, and crosses the lava filled chasm to the main cell. He keeps his weapons in his inventory for now. Dream is sitting sullenly on the chest. 

“Don’t look at me,” he says before Sam can even open his mouth. “I didn’t whitelist anyone. He just kinda... showed up. And then started jumping into the lava a whole bunch.” 

A moment later, the blue-shirted man respawns and drops into the single water block. He’s average height with long green hair the same color as Dream’s hoodie used to be and strange, transparent glasses. There’s something off about those glasses, but Sam can’t quite put his finger on it.

“Howdy!�� the stranger says, reaching a hand out for Sam to shake. “Joe Hills here, swimmin’ in lava as I always do in Nashville, Tennessee!” 

What’s a Nashville? Sam thinks but doesn’t ask. “How did you get in here?” 

Joe shrugs. “There was a whole-” he gestures vaguely “thing and this is where I respawned.” 

“You shouldn’t be here,” Sam says numbly. 

“Yeah, I kinda gathered.” 

Sam considers the man in front of him for a long moment. He’s definitely not putting Sam at ease for all he seems entirely relaxed himself. Probably better to keep him locked up until Sam has more information. On the other hand, probably better to not let Dream have unlimited access to a mysterious stranger with unknown abilities. 

“I’ll show you out of the cell,” he says. 

“That’s quite alright,” Joe brushes him off. “I can see myself out.” 

Sam blinks. “You can’t. The prison is impossible to escape.” 

“Oh! This is a prison. That makes a lot more sense.” 

“Look, just come with me–” 

“But I was starting to make progress!” Joe whines. “Tell you what. How about I come find you and let you know how I got out and then you can fix the security flaws–”  “There aren’t any.” 

“And then you can fix the security flaws and I can be on my merry way and everyone’s happy.”

From his corner, Dream scoffs. He’s made enough escape attempts of his own to know as well as Sam how futile the attempt is. “What are you, some kind of professional escape artist?” 

“I like to think of myself as a court jester but without the court,” Joe says as though it’s an explanation. “A jester of the masses, if you will. Point is-” he turns to Sam “I’m sure you got more important, wardenly things to be doing than escorting me out and I was just starting to get into the groove, so I’ll just keep trying if it’s all the same to you.” 

Sam pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m not letting you leave a path that the prisoner can follow to escape.” 

“I’ll message you when I get past the first room so you know to pick him up.” 

“That doesn’t–” Sam’s cut off by another ping from his communicator.

[ZombieCleo: you alright joe? getting bored already or are you actually making progress?]

[joehillssays: im making friends :D]

[joehillssays: where are you?]

[ZombieCleo: i found a casino. I'll send you the coords]

[joehillsays: cool i'll let you know when im on my way]

“I didn’t whitelist that one either,” Dream says tiredly. 

When the coords come through, Joe examines them carefully. “You think you could take me there?” he asks Sam. 

“Sure,” Sam sighs. He’s more than willing to make this guy someone else’s problem. He makes sure that Dream is still in the corner of his cell before tossing Joe a spare ender pearl. 

They walk in silence through the rest of the journey out of the prison, but Sam’s curiosity gets the better of him as they reach the exit. “So, did you manage to find any security flaws?” he asks.

Joe nods. “Uh, yeah, one pro tip real quick. It helps if your players don’t see the whole map before they go through it.” 

Before Sam can reply, he pulls out a bucket of lava and pours it out on the ground. 

[joehillsays tried to swim in lava]

[joehillssays: on my way]

[fakeloveaskblog]

Yay Loceit! (Ignore me, I have Loceit brainrot.) Can we see the zoo date? I would love to see the zoo date! (Is there a possibility of encountering Remus and make it a conjoined date? But, like, we don't tell him that's what it is? Because we don't wanna overwhelm the guy.)

(Words: 2712)

Janus: "Don't worry dear fiend. I have Loceit brainrot as well.....ALSo yes!! I totally haven't been waiting to tell someone all about the date. Pff totally not...So basically..."

When Janus arrived by the entrance of the zoo Logan was already waiting outside. They excitedly waved at each other before running up and clashing in a loving hug.

"So how is my one and only still not poisoned boyfriend doing?" Janus asked with a slight giggle in his voice.

“Very well now when I am with you”

Logan leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. His boyfriend already had a big grin on his lips but it only grew with the kiss.

He had on a blue suspenders, jeans and a t-shirt with some dude printed on it. The snake had tried to dress extra nice for his first ever date (!!) so he had his long black skirt and his finest purple shirt.

“That is...Jean-luc Picard..right?” He pointed at Logan’s t-shirt.

He flapped his hands around “Correct! I see that the star trek watching is teaching you a lot!”

“Well I do have a good teacher so of course”

The compliment left rosy blush on Logan’s cheeks. He took his boyfriend’s hand and intertwined their fingers before walking into the zoo. It had a big outside area for different larger animals and then a bulding to the west filled with frogs, fish, snakes, etc, etc.

Neither of them were that interested in the large animals. Though Janus did snark about how he looked like a seal and Logan stopped to take photos of the bears so he could show them to Patty later.

It wasn't until they passed a sign Logan suddenly let up into happy stims. He pointed to a house with big look through windows.

"Birds!"

He dragged Janus along with him to one of the windows. kestrels, subirds and kingfishers were flying around and vibing among trees and hung out fruit treats. A small crowd around them was also looking at the different birds.

Logan pointed between his boyfriend and the birds as if Jan hadn’t already seen them. He kept stimming his arm back and forth.

"Their aerodynamics are so fascinating don’t you think. Aside from humans they are the animal that are consistently closest to space and all because of their biology. They are like natural born astronauts”

“I respect any creature who can leave any and all social situations by flying away. Big dick move as some” Remus “says” Janus replied.

“If birds had too big dicks I think it would disturb their flying but yes I get your point” He let out a dreamy sigh “Oh what I would do to be able to inspect bird teeth, not to even talk about their wings!”

Logan squeezed his hand and smiled at him before dragging him over to the next bird. It was several big secretary birds. They were walking instead of flying.

"These ones are known for eating snakes" Lo commented "Are you feeling frightened?"

"Ah yes darling, I am already close to death from fear" He replied in as much of a monotone he could muster. They both chuckled.

Logan went on a long ramble about how the different biology of the species made the flying look and work different. His voice went a bit louder than it usually was, it always got like that when he was excited. Janus wouldn’t have minded it if there weren’t other people there.

He nodded along to his boyfriend’s rant but kept glancing to the people around them. Some of them were looking at Logan. Janus gulped. Suddenly holding his boyfriends hand hurt.

Janus quietly moved his hand away. His throat tightened. The people weren’t looking anymore but it felt like they did, like ants crawling up his skin. It had probably been a stupid idea to wear the skirt.

Obviously Logan noticed but he didnt say anyrhing about it. He finished his rant and asked "Do you want to reunite with your relatives- I mean look at the snakes now?"

"I uh “ He forced a confident smirk “Of course darling. It it prime time to return to my people!!”

They walked away from the birds and went down the sunny path towards the house that stored snakes among other things. It was lined by neatly cut trees and homes for mammals. They didn’t hold hands.

Janus kept fiddling with his gloves to the point of not even looking where he was walking. He bit the inside of his cheek until it was bleeding.

“Are you feeling alright?” Logan asked.

“Never been better!”

“If it is about the hand holding feeling nervous is nothing to be embarrassed about. When I first held hands with Patty I got so flustered I proceeded to walk into a swing and break my glasses”

Janus glanced around to the people around them “Ah yes that is definitely why I’m acting this way. Spot on dear” 

His boyfriend looked in the same direction he did “Oh alright I understand now” He patted him on the shoulder “Well I will have you know I have taken part in multiple physical fights to protect Patty from harassement, I did win most of them. I will of course do the same thing for you”

He said it so casually Janus nearly lost it “Exscuse me wHAT?”

Logan leaned down so they were eye to eye and put his hands on his boyfriend’s shoulders “Sweetheart I can and will break someone’s nose for you”

“That’s the most romantic thing someone has ever said to me”

“I would go for their kneecaps as well”

Janus clasped his hand over his heart and gasped in an overly dramatic tone “Oh such erotiscism you’re showing today!”

“I am legally obliged to show it off every now and then”

He straightened his back and continued to walk down the path. Janus hesitantly reached out to take his hand. Shame tugged at his heart but he buried his face against his boyfriend’s arm to try and ignore it. Logan gently moved his thumb up and down his skin in response.

“....I do still advise that you talk to Picani about it. I am aware it’s hard but if what you’ve told me about your mental health is true I believe it would be beneficial. I could help! I know Picani! Very intimately!”

“Darling please you don’t have to keep reminding me you’ve fucked my fake therapist” Janus sighed “I don’t know if I deserve to take up his time, I’m not That bad”

“Sweetie that is first degree bullshit” Logan replied very gently “There is scientifically no way to accurately compare two people’s mental healths to conclude which is worse. Trust me I did a study on it in college! Do I need to brag about my degree more?”

Janus let out a half hearted chuckle “I’ll think about it. Let’s focus on the snakes for now”

“Thinking about it is good enough for me” He pressed a kiss to his forehead.

They entered the building. The first room was lit in a calming blue because of the giant windows showing off octopuses and rays swimming around. A sign was pointing over to the frog and snake rooms.

Janus looked around the room in awe and- HOLY HELL REMUS WAS THERE. He sat crosslegged on a bench in front of the octopuses. He had headphones on and was focusing on the sketchbook in his hands. 

In a panic Janus started to drag his boyfriend with him to the frogs. Logan saw how flustered his boyfriend had suddenly become and looked around. He saw Remus as well and stopped in his tracks which forced his boyfriend to also stop.

“Does that happen to be the other guy you have a romantic interest in?”

“We’re here to look at snakes not at men Loganson!”

"Aww" Logan flapped his free hand "There are few things i like more than getting to see my partner being loved by someone else they love! We must talk to him"

"Oh- Oh god-" Janus let out while being tugged along.

Remus flinched when Logan shoved his ready to be shaken hand almost into his face. His whole body tensed to an uncomfortable degree.

"Greetings! I have no idea who you are!" Lo exclaimed.

He took off his headphones and looked up at him with panic in his eyes "Uh yeah" He saw Jan and immediately let out a breathe of relief. His shoulders relaxed slightly. "Hiya snakey~ Is This dude your snack?"

Janus was dying. He was dead. This was hell.

"NO! He's my sworn enemy! I'm here to use one of the sharks to kill him!"

Logan gasped "You are? How rude. Such a waste of the shark’s time when a bullet would do"

"Yeah!” Remus added “Anus! If that even is your real name-”

“It’s not”

“-I thought you would be much better at murder! Shark murder is sooo the 70's. Where's the orchestrated acrobatic dance knife throwing???"

Janus let out a dramatic huff "You simply don’t understand how hard it is to be a strong independent complete idiot and a serial murderer at the same time"

Logan nodded in sumpathy "Stranger would you like to accompany us on the rest of our zoo experience?"

He closed his sketchbook. Pages had been filled with doodles of the octopuses "Sure! I'm Remus by the way"

"Ah yes" They began to walk down the hallways lined by animal habitats. He held onto Janus’ hand "You were killed by your twin according to Roman mythology"

"I know!! That's why I chose it"

"Fascinating. I'm Logan. My parents chose it because of the X-man" His parents were also huge nerds.

“Hah dorks!” Remus said while skipping alongside them “Why are you holding hands? Is that a rule at zoos? Oh shit have I been doing zoos wrong???”

“I don’t think so. We are only doing it” Lo glanced at his still flustered boyfriend “.....to aggravate homophobes....yes...”

“COol!! Can I join?”

Logan nodded. Remus proceeded to take Janus’ free hand and happily tugged at it while skipping along. Jan had been wrong. NOW he was dying. His face was so hot from blushing he swore he could melt chocolate on it. The only way this could get ‘worse’ was if he suddenly grew a third arm and Remy appeared to hold it.

“Murder frogs!!” Remus exclaimed while stopping outside a window.

Inside sat several poison dart frogs in a pond surronded by leaves. They were in pretty neon colors and small enough to fit in the palm of a hand. Remus jumped up and down from excitement before pressing his entire face up against the glass.

“They’re the most poisonous animal in the world!!! Snakey you should murder Lo with this one!! These bitches can kill like 10 people with 1 poison thingie!!! it’s so cool!!”

“I have read that they can live to up to 15 years so they have ample time to kill hundreds of people in their lifetime” Logan replied.

“!!!! You are SO right!!! That’s my life goal as well!” Remus turned to look around the room and his eyes turned as big as a cat’s “Fucking hell. Look at how THICK that lizard is!!!”

Janus kept being dragged around between the two while they explored the animals. The saw toads stacked on top of each other, insects swarming around and exactly 1 incredibly friendly chameleon who climbed across a tree to get as close to the glass as it could.

Just holding both of their hands was so much to take in but hearing them rant facts to each other while looking so so happy made his heart feel things he didn’t know it could feel. He wanted to kiss them both and beg them to please never ever shut up.

The zoo melted away as he daydreamed about living as a poly relationship. Getting to see them both be this close and happy every day. Getting to hold them both like this every day. Getting to fall asleep next to them. Oh he was so-

“Hey Snakey you’ve been pretty quiet” Remus interrupted “Whatcha think?”

“dfshkjskj” Janus very eloquently let out. He buried his flushed pink face in the fabric of Logan’s shirt.

“Huh. Exactly what I was thinking! Onwards to the snakes!!”

The snake room was oval shaped. The walls were made up of windows into different giant vivariums decorated with branches, warm rocks and food. In the biggest vivarium several big samar cobras were lazing about. They were both big enough and venomous enough to kill a man.

Janus let go of his crushes to press his palms against the glass and wave at the snakes. He looked back at his boyfriend with a big goofy grin “Look at these babies!!”

“They are indeed very pretty”

“They eat rats! Their venom is able to destroy tissue so if you get the venom in your eyes it can create total blindness!! They-” He stopped himself. Stopped his stimming as well “Sorry. I’m rambling”

Remus patted his shoulder “No. Go on. I wanna hear, about the other snakes as well. I promise” Logan nodded along.

Janus hesitated, but they both looked at him with such loving looks he quietly continued “Okay well what I was going to say was...”

They went around and looked at every snake. The other two happily listened to him infodump about every species there. Sometimes they held hands. Sometimes they all stimmed together. Janus was smiling so much his cheeks hurt.

They stayed sitting by the snakes. Janus leaned his head against the glass to bop his nose to the snakes while Remus and Logan ranted to each other about their favorite obscure sci-fi movies (they also exchanged numbers). 

The three of them had a sudden realization that they all loved murder mysteries and decided they had to have some sort of murder mustery movie night some time in the future.

(Logan also saw a poster about how around Christmas snake petting spots overseered by snake experts would be open. He didn’t tell the other two. He figured he would use it as a surprise Christmas gift)

Eventually the zoo got close to closing. It was Logan who had to drag them both away from the snakes and octopuses. The 2 drama kings acted like Lo was dragging them away from their children.

Once they stood on the street outside the zoo Remus said goodbye. For a moment it looked like he was moving in to hug Janus but he decided not to. He disappeared down the street to catch the bus.

“So” Logan turned to his boyfriend “Was it a satisfactory first date?”

Janus rolled his eyes before wrapping his arms around his boyfriend’s waist and moving up on his toes to kiss him on his nose “It was absolutely horrible darling! I hated every second of it!”

“Glad to hear it” His voice softened “I’m proud of you honey”

“It was just a date. It’s nothing. Nothing if it’s with you”

“Well I shall still be proud, because you can not stop me, and I shall still be percentage wise incredibly in love with you” He pressed a loving kiss to his forehead “I will see you at work then”

“Not if I’ve gotten my invisibility spell to work by then muhahah” Janus slowly let go of him “Love you!”

Janus stood by the entrance watching as his boyfriend (it still made him giddy to think that) went to his car. He gulped and tensed his shoulders once he was all alone. He walked over to a more desolate spot and sat down on the side of the payment.

He scrolled through the contacts on his phone while the image of Logan’s smile repeated in his brain. He let out a shaky breathe as he moved the phone up to his ear and listened to the signals.

“Hiya Janister!” The cheery voice of Dr. Picani rang out.

“Hello...I.....I would....I’m just looking to ask if there’s a chance I could book a time for solo therapy? I’m...I’m...honestly not so sure if I’m completely okay...or if my childhood was okay either, but I’m sure I want to get better”