#the 2022 one is so ugly.. god...

[doumakei]

Sweet heart memory (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡

hey i was sick but have this these mfs are consuming my brain like parasites ugh i love them and this is actually a redraw of smth i did all the way back in like 2022 !! when i was still new to rottmnt lmfao wow progress yay

apr 2024 | nov 2022

[compacflt]

in regard to the icemav convo about american made cars: I think it would be funny if after mav gets his regular license, ice buys him a truck that they can use for transporting stuff to the hangar and when he gifts it to mav all the man can do is laugh bc stamped across the ass is MAVERICK. It’s a 2023 ford maverick (in area 51 bc I’m partial to that color)

and mav likes it, but he doesn’t love driving it bc it’s so big (and he just likes being a passenger princess too much), so ice drives it mostly which inspires a whole lot of jokes about ice liking having maverick’s name stamped on his ass. bradley gags from the other room every time.

if it matters to u, i agree with this hc 150% on rhetoric grounds. thank god for your mind.

however i would like to raise the issue that recent american pickup trucks have become non-useful, overexpensive, and suburban-coded in a way i think ice and mav would reject. the ford maverick was built with the intention of dropping kindergarteners off at school, not of actually doing hard labor. see below infographic for what I mean.

It’s a fucking travesty. Trucks are so ugly and useless now. the maverick is not immune to this. (maverick below)

what good is having a fucking truck if it can’t even hold two REGULAR ASS BIKES in the bed. & when the bed is empty the chassis is unbalanced in a way that leads to more accidents etc. (tbf that was true in the 70s/80s too but im feeling more hateful towards modern trucks rn). In short—the modern American pickup truck is no longer useful, it’s a way to virtue signal to other Americans that you *think * you know what hard labor is, even when you’re driving around in a glorified odyssey with a teeny tiny bed that can barely hold a couple bags of mulch for the back garden

ice & mav don’t even have any little kids anymore, i think they’d consider a backseat useless & a waste of space

SO i would like to offer you a Compromise, which is that ice & mav buy either (or both) a 1974 ford maverick AND/OR a 1990 ford maverick

for the Funny Name & coolness factor (& the “making Bradley vom cause of how cute his parents are” factor), and then soup up, like, a 1984 Chevy C10 for actual towing/hauling purposes.

[freebooter4ever]

Alright i googled intentionally negative reviews of the book and yeah it sounds like the sexualization of the dude's youth only gets worse in even more descriptive ways so im forcing myself to quit the book here :/ honestly i didnt expect to be so triggered by the damn thing. The synopsis and 90% of the reviews online are so positive: they talk about the main female character as this empowered art gallary owner who jet sets to festivals and biennales and the pop star dude kinda tags along. It sounded exciting and fun and kinda a tables turned version of nicole and steve's jet setting romance. And i am all too aware of the hostile art world that the main character has established herself in and i was excited to revisit that.

Absolutely none of that happened. Instead it was gross and triggering and frankly just sad :( im disappointed, lol. Especially because so many of my favorite male celebrities are in or were in this kind of age gap relationship. Steve and nicole: 14 yrs? Justin and ally: 12 or 13? Rami hasnt dated anyone less than 10 years younger than him since he was like 35 or something. I remember when taylor started dating hiddles and how odd it felt because i myself felt too young for hiddles. Diego and suki were a 12 years difference or something. And yikes i still remember when norman was dating that 19 year old in his 40s (thank GOD for diane lmao). Like there is definitely a trend. It is noticable. And i absolutely do not think those relationships were absuive - they happened when the women were well established in their 20s. So, i dunno, it would have been nice to read about the ages flipped in a way that was truly a romance instead of an age and youth obsessed confidence boost for the older woman. It makes me sad.

im listening to the book version of the anne hathawa*y rom com and it is even worse, my goodness, this female main character is a self obsessed elitist snob o.O

she also extremely fetishizes the male lead's youth in the same way my abusive ex did that is grossing me out. she talks about how beautiful he is with his smooth skin over and over. they have zero things in common beyond sex. dude run away from this woman. if she is only with you because of your tight skin and quick refractory period.... RUN.

like it would be one thing to read an age difference book where it truly was a meeting of hearts and minds and falling in love... but this aint it. :( i wanted a book that gave me hope about falling in love in my 40s since i squandered my 20s (abusive idiot), and my 30s (workaholic, unemployed). instead this is just squicking me out and making me never want to touch anyone else ever again -_-

[lovingyoulovinme]

childhood besties to strangers to ?

part 2

yourinstagram

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yourinstagram no feet on the table!

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yoursister i'm telling mom

charles_leclerc Photo creds please...

— View 42 more replies

yourinstagram no 😍

user1 my favorite best friends in the world

pascale.leclerc.355 Miss you beautiful!

— View 19 more replies

yourinstagram pascale!!! tu me manques plus 🥹🥹 (i miss you more)

charles_leclerc What about me???

yourinstagram we all know i've always been her favorite

yourfriend shes glowing 🥰🥰

user2 if my best friend was as beautiful as charles' i wouldve married her forever ago

March 2, 2022

f1wags

4,392 likes

f1wags leclerc has got a new girlfriend and it's not who we expected it to be 👀👀

View all 232 comments

user3 CHARLES WHAT ABT Y/N 😭😭😭

— View 13 more replies

user4 they've literally always said they're just friends!!!!

ynstan oh......

user5 shes beautiful!!!

April 8, 2022

charles_leclerc

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charles_leclerc 🤍

View all 5,364 comments

user6 y/n is better

charlottesine 😚🥰

user7 bro gripping that arm she not going anywhere 😭

ylnleclerc y/n commenting on everything charles has ever posted but not this :(

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user4 she literally liked the post im sure shes happy for them

arthur_leclerc ❤️

user1 crying just a lil

April 23, 2022

yourinstagram

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yourinstagram turnt 24 last week so far so good

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user8 A MANS??????

ylnleclerc praying to god thats charles

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user9 u know his style isnt that good be fr

yourfriend my angel 🫶

rubendias Moça bonita (beautiful girl)

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user1 WHO ARE YOU

user3 he's a footballer for manchester city girl

charlesandyn this is def her man...its so over

jackgrealish Got him dressing good 👏

August 17, 2022

rubendias

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rubendias Time off 💙 p.s the cake tasted a lot better than it looks 😂

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yourinstagram are you calling my cake ugly?????????

yourinstagram stones would never treat me like this

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johnstonesofficial 😘

rubendias 🤣🤣🤣

user2 charles getting replaced so easily 💔

bernardetealvesdias 💙💙

user4 pls give her back to the f1 community we had her first

yoursister take good care of her or else...

— View 23 more replies

rubendias Always

October 25, 2022

yourinstagram

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yourinstagram my little life 🫶

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arthur_leclerc reviens, s'il te plaît 😭😭😭 (please, come home)

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yourinstagram little leclerc oh how i miss you :(

user3 HELLO???? A Y/N&LECLERC INTERACTION

user10 not the one it should be tho 😭

rubendias You have an addiction, baby.

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yourinstagram you literally bought all of them for me

erling.haaland Share.

user1 i'm really happy for her but at what point will her and charles be friends again 😔

November 15, 2022

charles_leclerc added to their story.

December 6, 2022

arthur_leclerc added to their story.

February 23, 2023

[stvrmhondss]

it was breaking down (it was falling in love) snippet

max/charles 3.1k words

this is from a wip that is currently in development. we're in 2025, charles and max are fighting each other for the championship for the first time since 2022. max, as always, in red bull. charles, by the grace of god, still in ferrari. it gets complicated.

The party after the last race before summer break isn’t a tradition officially, but somehow there’s always been one; a simple text in the drivers’ group chat letting them know that xyz and I are getting drinks later, you’re all welcome to join and when the rest of them show up to the address provided, there’s somehow always an entire house rented and seemingly bottomless drinks. It’s one of those mysteries of F1 that Charles thinks he’ll never crack.

For the past few years the summer break kickoff has been an opportunity for him to celebrate, not in a let’s raise a glass to a good first half of the season way, but more of a thank god that’s over kind of way. It had always consisted of systematically knocking back glass after glass until he’d been drunk enough to let whatever girlfriend he’d had at the time drag him onto the dancefloor, if he’d had one at the time.

(He always did.)

(Except this year)

For the first time in his F1 career, Charles is leading the championship at the start of the summer break and instead of forcing every driver and his own mechanics to have a drink with him, he’s making himself as small and invisible as possible in a corner, right beside a potted palm tree that straddles the line between looking extremely well cared for and extremely fake. He’s been nursing the same cocktail for almost an hour and has avoided every driver, staffer or intern who wanted to drink to his championship charge. He’s not in the mood. He’s even managed to chase away Alex and Lily to the bar, if just temporarily, his teammate vowing to get him another round to pull him out his funk.

Instead he’s been letting his gaze roam over the open floor, taking note of the people there and pretending he isn’t looking for Max. It’s going semi-well. Charles hadn’t seen him when he’d entered the house with Alex and he hasn’t spotted him since. He’s also been too much of a coward to just grab someone, another driver or a stray Red Bull intern, and ask them whether they’d seen him, whether he’s even here at all. Maybe, it’s for the best – he wouldn’t know what to say to Max anyway. Have you tried a simple ‘I’m sorry’? The voice in his head sounds suspiciously like Pierre and it has him take a long sip from his glass.

The horrible thing is, Pierre is right. He should really apologise, but it’s been so long since their fight in Monaco and the silence between them has gotten so loud, he wouldn’t know where to start. He’s also not entirely sure Max wouldn’t just walk away from him if he were to approach him now. Hence his hiding in the corner.

After emptying his glass, he looks around the room again. He spots Lewis on the dance floor, chatting up a model he knows for a fact is too young for him. A little ways off to the side he sees Lando hanging off of his Max’s shoulders and Charles tries valiantly to ignore the ugly twisting of his insides. It reminds him of Imola, just a few short months ago – how Max had told him to let go for once and had stood vigil as he’d gotten drunk and celebrated his first win on Italian soil since 2019, how Max had let him cling to him when he hadn’t been able to stand upright on his own anymore and then had called them both a taxi and had gotten him home. Funny how he’d managed to ruin it all with a single sentence.

Charles is pulled out of his thoughts by wild waving in his periphery and when he turns his head he spots Pierre over by a window with his new girlfriend, whose name Charles had forgotten the minute he’d been introduced to her, obviously trying to get his attention. Confused, he shakes his head and mouths a What? in his direction, to which Pierre starts pointing in the direction of the door in response, an insistent look on his face. Charles turns his head just in time to see Daniel Ricciardo enter the party and he’d wonder about seeing him here when he’d given up his AlphaTauri seat last year in favour of a go in Indycar, if following right behind him wasn’t—

Max.

Charles watches as they’re stopped by multiple people on their way in – there’s plenty of hugs for Daniel and claps on the shoulder for Max – and make a beeline for the impromptu bar. Daniel sees him about halfway there and Charles fights and consequently loses against the urge to shrink in on himself when the instinctive smile he throws at everyone turns into a scowl at the sight of him. So, Max had told him then. Charles doesn’t know what else he’d expected.

(Not this. He hadn’t even known they were still close.)

Max doesn’t look at him once.

He should stop staring, knows it very well won’t help his case in any way, but his eyes stay glued to Max’s form, taking him in – blonde hair, blue eyes, standard white t-shirt and jeans. All viewed from afar, as has become standard over the past few weeks. Charles wants to kick himself. He wonders what would happen if he were to throw aside his pride and cowardice and go over to him now, if he asked to speak to him, to explain. Would Max even spare him a glance? Would he frown and grumble and tell him to fuck off? Would Daniel’s scowl become more severe and would he tell him to get lost?

He doesn’t plan on finding out.

So he watches. Watches as Daniel leans exaggeratedly over the bar to order some drinks and then back to whisper something in Max’s ear that has him laugh in that full-body way of his – head thrown back and hands clasped together, then bending forward, eyes crinkled at the corners and nose scrunched up. Full of delight, full of life. When Max seems to have calmed down a little he moves closer to Daniel, a mischievous look on his face, no doubt saying something just as cheeky in return, and Charles sees Daniel break out in one of his honking laughs before throwing an arm around his shoulders and pulling him in. Just for a moment, Max rests his head on his shoulder and Daniel turns his face into his hair. Just for a moment. Blink and you miss it.

And Charles? Well, Charles wants to die.

Alex and his tray full of drinks are a godsend, Lily clearing the way for him as they come back to join him in his miserable corner, and Charles grabs a glass and knocks it back before Alex even has a chance to put the tray down. When he puts the glass back down, Lily lets out a hoot, slapping the table, while Alex scoffs at him goodnaturedly.

“Were you raised in a barn, mate?” He’s chuckling, hitting him lightly on the shoulder. “Where I’m from, you wait until everyone has a glass and then you drink like your life depends on it.” Next to him, Lily cackles, pressing the next drink into his hand and then grabbing one for herself.

“Sorry,” he’s not, really, only tangentially in the way that Alex has been a good sport ever since his fight with Max, letting him be miserable and not making him explain why, and Charles feels bad for making him put up with his bad mood when it’s his first season in the team and he should be having fun instead of babysitting him. But then again, misery and Ferrari go hand in hand and Alex should probably learn to live and work with that, if he wants to survive in the team.

Charles’ fingers itch for another drink.

“Oh, who cares?” Lily raises her glass and waits for them to mirror her. “Let’s fucking party!”

Right before he knocks back his drink, Charles spares another glance over to Max and Daniel, just to see, just because he’s feeling curious and maybe a little masochistic, pressing a finger into an open wound. What he sees makes him down half of the contents of his tall glass all at once – Max is fully pressed into Daniel’s side, Daniel’s arm around his waist, fingers on that tantalising dip of it that Charles had found himself staring at more than once, and Daniel’s once again leaning in, whispering something into his ear that makes him smile. Charles wants to throw up.

He loses track of how much he drinks after that.

One, two, ten hours later, he looks up from his fourth – twelfth? – glass and sees Max making his way over to and up a stairwell that he vaguely remembers leads to a balcony. He’s alone, Daniel nowhere in sight. Without a second thought, he excuses himself from the table and stumbles over to follow him before Alex and Lily can protest. The way up the stairs is perilous and he has to cling to the bannister to hold himself upright, hoping he’s not making so much noise he gives himself away. 

When he finally reaches the balcony, he finds it miraculously empty, except for Max, standing at the railing and looking out into the night. A few lanterns bathe him in soft, warm light and Charles’ heart squeezes painfully in his chest. He’s so beautiful, always has been in his own way, the charmingly gangly, awkward teenage limbs turned strong and broad, handsome. Growing up alongside Max had been complicated and a little painful – at 15 years old, how do you know you hate the guy you’re competing against because of his dirty tricks and raw talent and not because his eyes are as blue as a summer sky? How do you know your palms are sweaty because of the adrenaline of a good fight on track and not because he smirked at you right before he put his helmet on? They’re questions Charles has never quite managed to answer and is keenly reminded of now at 27 years old, standing on a balcony somewhere in Belgium with his heart beating out of his chest at the mere sight of Max. He doesn’t think he’ll ever have a clear answer. 

His drunken lean to the side has him knock over a decorative cat figurine with a loud clang, startling Max in front of him like a deer hearing a sudden noise in what it had assumed to be an empty clearing. He whips around and when he sees Charles trying to right himself, an unhappy scowl settles on his pretty lips.

“What do you want, Charles?”

I want to go back in time and smack myself for what I said to you. I want you to smile at me like you used to, like you smiled at Daniel and I don’t know what that means. I want us to be okay. I want to win and I want you by my side when I do. I want us to be alright.

“Nothing, I just—,” he’s pretty sure he’s slurring, which seems to not be helping his case as Max’s expression doesn’t lighten. In fact, it does the opposite, making Charles trail off, falling quiet as Max looks at him expectantly. He doesn’t remember what he’d originally wanted to say, so instead he throws out the first thing that comes to his mind after Your eyes have the colour of a storm I once saw while out at sea.

“You haven’t talked to me since Monaco,” it’s meant as an explanation, but once the words leave his mouth, they sound like an accusation. Max’s frown deepens, his eyebrows furrowing and the corners of his mouth pulling further down. A little more and he’d be pouting. It’s one of the things that’s never changed about him, Charles ponders idly. That stormy, unhappy frown. The only difference between a 27 year old and a 13 year old Max Verstappen frowning at him is a missing, involuntary flush to his cheeks and the lack of acne. The other boys had always made fun of him for it back then – how easily he’d flush, how quickly he’d get irritated. Charles had never minded either; he’d thought it made Max seem more alive.

Now, Max looks alive in a primordial sense, the way the earth itself is – burning, blazing, vengeful.

“Well, I wonder why,” his voice is venomous, face twisted in an ugly sneer, “I wonder why I would not be speaking to you after Monaco.”

Charles feels helpless, like a fumbling child. “No, no, that’s not what I meant—“ But he doesn’t know how to actually express what he wants to say, his mind foggy and slow. He wants to curse Alex for bringing that entire tray of drinks to the table. 

He continues to stutter, without saying anything of worth, and he can see Max is losing what little patience he’d had to begin with and – yes, there’s that angry, red flush that’s been missing in his cheeks before.

“Do you actually have anything to say to me,” Max’s shoulders are heaving, his breath heavy, “or do you just want to waste my time and stand here, staring at me like a drunk idiot?”

It’s meant to cut him and it does; Charles flinches from the impact, sure that if he were to raise his fingers to his cheek, they’d come away bloody. The thing is, he has so much to say, so many things that have been long overdue, that he should’ve said months, maybe years ago, but now that he has Max in front of him, in all his furious beauty, his brain can’t put the words in order, can’t form the sentences he needs to say to salvage whatever he had, could’ve had, with Max. The alcohol isn’t helping either.

In his drunken stupidity, he says the worst thing he could possibly say in this moment.

“I saw you with Daniel, earlier.”

It’s horrible, it’s the dumbest thing he’s ever said. It does nothing to convey what he actually wants Max to hear, instead he manages to make it sound like an accusation again when all he’d wanted to say was I saw you with Daniel earlier and you looked happy, happier than you have over the past few weeks and I wanted to kick myself for being the source of your sadness, when I only want to see you smile and laugh and be joyful. 

Max’s face is wrathful, his breath quickening and Charles isn’t quite sure whether he’s just imagining the thunder he hears in the distance.

“You can’t be fucking serious,” his voice is tight, controlled and shaking with white hot rage. Charles resists the urge to flinch. He deserves Max’s anger and he’ll take it. He’ll take anything Max is still willing to give him.

“I haven’t heard from you in weeks, and yet you complain about me not talking to you when you haven't even tried to speak with me. I thought you needed time to cool off, so I gave you space, of course, but you keep insisting on this childish grudge over nothing. You ignore me, give me the cold shoulder, and say to the press that we’re not friends when I did nothing you wouldn’t have done if you’d been in my place. Mind you, I didn’t even say anything to the media when I damn well should’ve, but of course, you still find something to complain about.”

Max is panting and the toll this entire conversation is having on him is evident in the pinched corners of his mouth, however, he doesn’t seem to be done just yet.

“And now, for the first time in what feels like ages, I’m having a fun night and you decide to pester me and complain about me spending it with Daniel, when it’s none of your business? When you and I, as you’ve insisted, are nothing?”

Charles reels back from the impact as if Max had physically slapped him across the face. You and I are nothing. He sees champagne showers in Australia. You and I are nothing. Breaking into the Circuit de Monaco at night. You and I are nothing. Max scaring everyone into packing their phones away when Charles had been drunk and without inhibitions in Imola. You and I are nothing. Dancing in the streets of Miami at night.

You and I are nothing.

It’s terrible.

He deserves it.

Max prepares to breeze past him back inside and Charles instinctively grabs onto his arm to make him stay, to make him not leave him. His movements are slow and his grip as weak as a kitten, Max could shake him off easily, but he doesn’t. He glares at him, a fire raging in his eyes, and opens his mouth to undoubtedly berate him again. Deliriously, Charles remembers that the hottest flames burn blue.

Before he can think better of it, his lips fit themselves over Max’s, quelling any upcoming rant. Any rational or coherent thought dies out in his mind and when he tries to think of any reasons why this is the worst thing he could do, he gets as far as Max’s lips are soft before he loses the thread and closes his eyes.

Horribly, Charles feels a startled hum against his lips and then Max is leaning in, letting him carefully cradle his face with his free hand. He’s even allowed to deepen the kiss, sneaking his tongue past Max’s lips and sliding his hand in his hair, and for an exhilarating moment he has Max in the palms of his hands, warm and lovely, and he wants to keep him like this for as long as he’s allowed to.

When Max recoils from his touch, it’s with enough force to send him stumbling backwards. The look on his face is devastating when Charles opens his eyes again. There’s a storm brewing in his eyes – anger, disappointment, fear, pain. Charles feels monstrous. His mouth opens and closes several times, but no words make it out alive. 

To Charles’ horror, there’s tears pooling at the corners of Max’s eyes. Regret is a bitter, nasty thing to swallow and he knows his face must be doing something complicated and sad. He finds his voice in the most inopportune of moments.

“Max, I—,” he sounds scratchy and choked up, even to his own ears, and Max doesn’t let him get any further, storming past him through the open balcony doors and back inside, knocking their shoulders together in his desperation to get away from him and sending Charles careening into a potted plant. As he picks his way out of the leaves, he hears a door slam inside.

Charles looks up at the stars and wishes that just for once, he wouldn’t ruin everything he loves.

[kanmom51]

Jikook - what we see is what we get

When we get to see it.

Not seeing it doesn't mean it's not there though.

Was sitting today BTS songs just playing in the background while I'm working on my post. All this shit just happening around us, around JK and JM (yes, JM is part of it, he's also affected by it all), and The truth untold comes up.

This version:

One of, if not their best performance imo. The emotion just pouring out of them.

This song. It kills me every single time. Brings me to tears every single time. JM turned away from JK singing "and I still want you" in every performance. Well, other than their last 3 in Seoul, changed by them, performed by them, ending facing each other JM singing "but I still want you". Defiant.

All about the need to wear that mask to hide your true self for fear you might not be loved for who you truly are, that you might be seen as ugly, a monster. And the two of them, changing the staging, turning to each other, looking into each other's eyes, while changing the "and" to "but I still want you"... do people understand this? The enormity of this moment?

And then this song comes up, this performance:

This was on day 2, while on day 3 we had this:

Omg, my YT logarithm is trying to kill me today.

And got me thinking about this moment we got on day 3 as well.

This love, people, this chemistry, us not seeing it as often for the lack of BTS ot7 content doesn't mean is gone. It's very much still there. We just aren't as lucky to be able to see them in that one frame as often or even at all. But when we do, there is no denying it. Even if it's for the shortest of moments.

We saw it in 2020 (have people forgot memories 2020 for god sake?)

We saw it in 2021

So much more, so little image allowance... But you can find it all in my masterlist.

We saw it throughout 2022 in their Seoul and LV PTD concerts.

And in JITB even if briefly,

And in Busan and Run BTS episodes.

And we even got a little touch of it in 2023, when there was no way of keeping them out of the frame, like in Jhope's enlistment BTB, D-Day in Seoul and even when not being in one frame, in those lives we got to enjoy when the one joined the other in their comments and even without the other even making that kind of appearance.

Letter, goddamnit.

Oh and then we had JM literally flying across the world to be with JK for his Solo debut (if only GMA concert wasn't cancelled, damn it), and them dipping off for their 4 day private trip in CT.

It's sad how short people's memories are. Really. I am reading all sorts of fanfictions being put forward as "this is what happened with Jikook over the years", stating facts that are not facts, creating non existent drama, because people love the drama.

This is a loving couple in a long term relationship. You know, that boring kind. The stable, loving, filled with respect and no drama. The one where one supports their partner when they are struggling. One where just being with each other is fulfilling (cough JK coming to JM's room in LA just to be with him in the same room for hours cough).

Funny how people are talking about them breaking up 2020-21 during the pandemic when JK literally had a slip of the tongue spilling the beans they live together, they are one household, in Run BTS episode 142 they were each gifted a knife. JK all proud and piping up "we got 2"...

JM just sitting there all quiet, smirk on his face.

Stories about breakups. Stories about sexually experimenting but no actual emotional commitment. All while ignoring the constants. Those things that are just there, all the time, whenever we do get to see them:

That electrical chemistry between those two.

The way they look at each other constant over the years.

The way they talk to each other constant over the years.

The way they touch each other constant over the years.

The way they talk about each other.

The way their interactions are so different from the others or their own with the others.

The way the others are around them, their reaction to Jikook.

All still there!!!

*PS:

I wrote this post yesterday before JK's Radiohead appearance and his TikTok post-delete.

I guess now would be a good time to repeat what the wise @ourwinterspring (yes, I'm mentioning you again, lol) once said (well a couple of days ago, that is):

Rumors are created by haters

accepted by fools

and spread by idiots

[bazzybelle]

Square/Prompt: B1 - Meet Ugly

Title: Trouble is a Friend

Rating: Teen

Ship(s): Dream of the Endless | Morpheus / Hob Gadling

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Additional Tags: Meet-Ugly, Alternate Universe-Modern Setting, Grey's Anatomy AU, neurosurgeon Dream, Surgical Nurse Hob Gadling, Human Matthew the Raven, Pre-relationship, Awkward First Meetings

Summary:

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s some hot-shot businessman. Oh God, maybe he’s a big-headed neurosurgeon like your buddy over there, eh?” Hob chuckles before finally noticing the look on Matthew’s face. “Oh fuck, he’s right behind me, isn’t he?” “Indeed, I am. And maybe I wouldn’t have been so aggressive on the road had a certain cyclist left me some room to maneuver.” Hob Gadling's day starts off wonderfully when he's splashed head to toe by one of the rudest drivers he's ever had to encounter. Luckily the day can't possibly get any worse, right? Too bad that same rude driver just happens to be one of the surgeons he'll be working with at his new job. An insanely attractive, yet imperious neurosurgeon to be exact. This is fine. He'll be fine, right?

Link, if full work is posted elsewhere:

Here is my first submission for @dreamlingbingo! The prompt was Meet-Ugly! I am planning on making all of my submissions fit into a larger Grey's Anatomy AU I'm slowly building.

Thank you to msdonnanoble and @embroiderling for the beta-reading and the wonderful notes. Hugs and love!

[skzpixie]

Taglist: @mynameisnotlaura, @palindrome969

Scene 1: Maniac world tour 2022 V live with her brother 

Kai is sitting on a couch in an unfamiliar setting, pictures of her family barely seen with her old as hell phone.  Kai: Hello!  She giggled, waving her hand around excitedly as a greeting. She looks down at the tablet with the live pulled up, watching comments.   Kai: I’m in my childhood home, that's why it’s so weird looking.  Someone off screen: It isn’t weird looking!! You’re weird looking!  Kai glared at the person off screen  Kai: This is why I’m the favorite child, Bo. I don’t interrupt you when you're working!  Bo: Because I refuse to let you near it, roach  Kai: I hope you die in the worst possible way, Fei Bo  Bo: If it means getting away from your ugly face, I'll gladly take that chance  She takes off her slipper and chucks it at Bo off screen. You could tell by the way he immediately yelled after.  Kai: MOM!! He hit me!!  An older woman off screen: Bo, don’t hit your sister!  Bo: I didn’t DO anything!! She hit ME!!  Kai giggles at the chaos unfolding in the kitchen, her mom scolding her older brother who was glaring at Kai. 

Scene 2: Instagram livestream titled “Changbin simp club” 

Kai is laying in her bed, watching the stream go by, bundled in blankets  Kai: Oh my god! This reminds me of the bubble conversation I saw—Yes, I use bubble, but I’m forbidden to post on there. Something about “Maintaining idol image”, which is BS but anyway.  She sits up, brushing the hair out of her face  Kai: OKAY! So, I keep seeing posts about Changbin going around, and my lizard brain is going crazy at some of the pictures. BIN!! Get in here!!  The door opened, letting in a beam of soft light against her purple lights. Changbin unceremoniously plops himself on her lap, facing her stomach. Kai runs her hands through his curly hair.  Kai: So, you guys know I have a thing for muscles, right. I mean, look at this man  She picks up his arm, squishing the muscle before biting his Bicep.  Changbin: Hey!  He whined, before blowing air onto her stomach, causing her to laugh hard.  Kai: Okay, you can go now  She pressed a kiss to the area she bit, and he walked out, closing the door  Kai: Now, his boobs- 

Scene 3: Kai and her affinity for man boobs 

Kai: Hanji!!  She runs up to him in his diesel shirt w/ the boob window. They were filming a skz talker, and she didn’t realize before it was too late  Han: What- HUH??!  She cups his chest and sticks her head inside it, effectively motorboating him. She walks away, satisfied and Han just stood there in shock 

It was during SKZ talker 48, when she was getting her makeup done, Seungmin walked over and sat on her lap, shocking the artist. She rolled her eyes and groped his chest, getting a squeak from the man. Said man ran away after calling her a pervert. 

During the live show (The one where Hyunjin and Lee Know did the troublemaker challenge), Kai is told to do a dance challenge with Changbin and Chan.  Kai, in English: I'm with the big titty gang  Chan: huH?!?   Chan chases after her and slings her across his shoulder. 

An episode of Chan’s room, Chan was talking about how clingy Kai was  Chan: Oh yeah! (He laughs, all shy now) She is big on the chest area, for some reason? I don’t get it, but-  He gets cut off with Kai running into the room and jumping on Chan in his chair. He does a little scream, Kai shoving her face into his chest while whining  Kai: Don’t give away my secrets, boob man!  She falls off the chair hard and ran out of the room, cackling as he looked after her, perplexed 

Scene 4: Young Pixie being a menace without realizing it 

Kai: Minho hyung!!  Kai is in the haunted house with the other members. She is partnered with Lee Know and Han  Lee Know: Kai-ah! It’s improper to call your elders hyung when you are a girl  Kai stares blankly at Lee know.  Kai: Would you rather me call you motherfuc- 

During the English debate, she is put on the team with less English speakers to make it more even.  Kai: (Mocking the Australians when they laugh at their team) PrAwN oN tHe BaRbIe  Felix, right back at her: Oh my god, Stephanie, do you want to go out to the mall today? (Imitating a valley girl accent)  Kai: That’s not even the right accent! Do you want to meet your ancestors? (She holds up a fist, getting hysteric laughs from her members) 

Kai is watching her members greet the audience, and when it was time for her to introduce herself, she froze, forgetting her line completely(She just had to introduce herself)  Kai: Hello, my name is Bang Chan and you’re watching Disney channel (Proceeds to do the Disney Channel logo) 

Kai starting the trend of her members mocking JYP. Their first performance, she is seen in the background imitating JYP’s singing of their debut. 

[sleepanonymous]

I think I’m mentally in a good enough headspace to finally write about this. This will be a ranty post, so skip it if you’d like. I’m also not going to pretend I’m not wildly speculating here. I do not know Vessel, nor am I a mental health professional. This is just me rambling into the void; I did my best to make it coherent.

So, to start, we’ll need the message from Vessel that he played during his The Room Below set and the text on screen from the Fall For Me music video. Since I’ll call back to them, I’ve transcribed both below.

Fall For Me:

The truth is I am due a harsh lesson in truth itself and how bitter it can be. Will you teach me? The truth is I am ugly, I am inadequate, I am lost, I am no god. The truth is, I want, to want, to live, and so do you. I just can’t do this any longer. I am afraid. Are you afraid? I want to understand what it is to let go. So for now let me live as a living drama of your pain. If we are to be submerged let us be submerged together.

Vessel’s Room Below Message:

We are here to silently connect. To project ourselves onto one another. We are here to remember. We are here to forget. We are here to worship. Some time ago, I was given a message. It was a message that originated from one of you. Someone possessed by a strong desire to tell me something. The message read very simply: You saved me. I have thought about this message a great deal since. It left me with a feeling that I have somehow been mistaken for someone else. I did not save anyone. I do not believe I have the capacity to save anyone. All I have ever given anyone was a small window into the emotional waiting room of my mind. I do so whilst doing everything in my power to minimize my own vulnerability. In this way, I am selfish. I chose not to give what others can, and yet I am the benefactor of this thankful praise. |I experience a great deal of pain in my life. However, I do not believe I have suffered as you have suffered. Perhaps that is another reason why we are here. At the very least, we have all suffered. I would also like to take this chance to tell you something. To love oneself is not the easy task we are sometimes told it is. We are all limited by something. We are all guilty of something. My own path towards a place of greater self-acceptance is paved with the art that I create. It is a path that I continue to stumble down at the expense of everything else. I am nothing without this music. I am nothing without this mask. So, in this sense, the message I received was true, but only in an inverse sense. The truth is I did not save anybody. You saved me.

For a bit of background, the Fall For Me music video was released in September of 2021, right before the release of TPWBYT. The Room Below show was initially set for January 2022. It was postponed twice due to COVID-19 and was finally set for the end of April 2022. To be honest, most bands would have just cancelled the show after it was postponed, especially if it was a single show, not part of a tour, and not meant for the entire band to be present. According to an online article, the show itself even started half an hour later than it was supposed to. Again, I’m wildly speculating, but Vessel wanted to do this show specifically to deliver his Room Below message. He doesn’t communicate any other way with his fans aside from the occasional chuckle on stage and his awful (/affectionate) heart hands. So what else was he supposed to do in order to respond to that person who told them that he, specifically, saved their life?

Let me back up a bit. Again, this is speculation, but I believe this person with their strong desire to communicate their message to Vessel did so before the music video for Fall For Me was released in September of 2021. It’s possible the message came after, but before makes the most sense (at least to me). I say this because the music video for the song has no direct connection to the lyrics. The base subject matter for Fall For Me is about longing and wanting someone who does not want you back, at least not in the same way.

On the other hand, the music video is Vessel (or a character he is portraying, if that makes you feel more comfortable) committing suicide by sea, and, upon first watch, the words on the screen are his suicide note. With closer examination, this is not the case. The words on the screen, though some statements do seem like they belong in a suicide note, are more like a precursor to Vessel’s Room Below speech, especially with the “I want to want to live, and so do you” quote. Even more than that, the statements show Vessel disproving himself and his importance to Sleep Token fans.

“I am ugly”, “I am inadequate”, “I am selfish”, “I am nothing without this mask.” With these four quotes, I’ll move on to the second part of this post. These four statements are coming from a man with severely diminished self-worth. Plainly, Vessel is struggling, or, to use his word, he is suffering. Without pulling more from his music, these quotes alone are a tell-tale sign that Sleep Token’s anonymous marketing strategy has backfired in the most spectacular way for Vessel. While it has captured the attention of over two million monthly listeners on Spotify and garnered over ninety-nine million views on YouTube, the anonymity has ruined Vessel’s self-esteem.

With the above stated, I believe he’s still on board with keeping up the anonymity of Sleep Token. To be frank, I think he’s the only member of Sleep Token who is still 100% on board with the gimmick. The Vesselettes recently unmasked back in July 2023 (good for them; they deserve to be recognized and praised for their talents), and there are multiple accounts of II, III, and IV walking around festivals and venues unmasked, sometimes even wearing their full stage costumes sans masks. Vessel relies on his masked identity like a crutch to deliver his art. He does so because he believes he has to. He plainly stated this fact to the six hundred people at the Lafayette with him in April of 2022 and, by conduit, all of Sleep Token’s fans who have heard the multiple recordings and edits of this message.

The other members, II, III, IV, even the Vesselettes, the old keyboardist, OG IV, and 2020 session player Sam Kubrick, have all achieved variable success without the Sleep Token façade in the public eye. But not Vessel. The best he had was performing on a small stage hosted by his former university at a music festival in 2014. Before that, he struggled to get subscribers on YouTube and played open mic nights at a local café. Vessel didn’t achieve any recognition or fame until after he put on the mask and bought entirely into the idea that his music, his art, should be wholly separated from who he is as a person.

This mindset reminds me of a Miley Cyrus quote (stick with me; I promise this is relevant) from a few years back. She did a podcast interview and said the following about her Hannah Montana persona: “When I looked like myself, when I didn’t have the wig on anymore, no one cared about me. I wasn’t a star anymore.” Her quote helped put Vessel’s statement, “It left me with a feeling that I have somehow been mistaken for someone else”, into perspective. I saw that snippet on YouTube a couple of weeks ago, and it was like everything instantly snapped into place involving Vessel’s insistence on remaining anonymous.

With the above said, do I believe that the anonymity schtick is a trash idea and that the band should ditch it? Absolutely not, because it works. Without anonymity, the band would not have blown up the way they did after The Summoning dropped in January 2023. Without anonymity, there wouldn’t be extra layers of added lore. Without anonymity, there would be no mini ARGs for the fans curious enough to wonder why there are no credits on the songs their streaming services are suggesting to them (thanks for fucking that up, by the way, Apple Music. A+ shitshow right there). We would not have such emotional, beautiful, heart-wrenching songs without Vessel’s anonymity. Vessel has said this last point himself with his quote about minimizing his vulnerability. Would Vessel have had the confidence to put out songs like Bloodsport, Atlantic, High Water, Missing Limbs, or even Vore without his mask to shield him? In Vessel’s words, all he has given his fans is “a small window into the emotional waiting room of [his] mind.” But what a gifted, beautiful, turbulent, fractured, and brilliant waiting room we have been allowed to see.

In closing, whoever it was that gave Vessel the message about saving their life, I sincerely hope they were in attendance for The Room Below show, and I hope they heard Vessel’s response. I hope they both, as well as anyone else touched by this interaction between the two, have found support channels for the weight of their pain. I hope that they are happy.

TL;DR Vessel is a beautiful, talented, and humble human being who has and continues to save lives with his music. He deserved so much more attention than he got before Sleep Token. I want Vessel to know this (even though he will never see this post). However, I also do not think that he and the other boys should not drop Sleep Token’s anonymity act at the expense of their comfort.

[cuephrase]

2024 Writing Review

tagged in this by @androxys, tysm!!

number of stories posted to ao3: four- three drabbles, one one-shot and one multi-chap fic

word counted posted for last year: 37, 886!! that's so much for me, crazy (both 2022 and 2023 were around 7k, for comparison)

fandoms i wrote for: batman - all media types, babyyyy. two of the drabbles were very comic specific so i have batman (comics) and nightwing (comics) tagged. wait. lmao that was wrong, i've edited it now, was supposed to be batgirl (comics) someone help me oh my god

pairings: we've got two hits for Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, then Cassandra Cain & Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Everyone, Tim Drake & Jason Todd, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, and Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne

so, bc that's giving me a headache, five Dick tags, four Tim tags, four Bruce tags, four Jason tags, and one Cass tag. all but three of those are one fic tho lmao.

stories with the most kudos, bookmarks and comment threads: penance, far and away. that fic got (is getting?) so much more love than i could have imagined or hoped for. absolutely mind-blowing fr

work i’m most proud of (and why): okay so this is a tie between penance and plea for two completely opposite reasons! penance is the first multichap fic i've ever completed and that's a huge milestone for me. plea i'm really proud of bc it's only 100 words but i feel like i managed to accomplish absolutely everything i wanted to and it's sooooooo satisfying to me.

work i’m least proud of (and why): hmmmmm. maybe inventory? it was supposed to be fluff and i corrupted it. so that frustrates me when i think about it even though the finished product isn't bad.

share or describe a favorite review you received: oh gosh ummmmm. help. i really loved every comment letting me know they'd cried real tears bc i am Evil. but if i had to choose one comment, i think this one has stuck with me the most (some parts blocked out bc Spoilers)

the fic has an ending spoiler now that it's complete, but when i was posting it i hadn't totally nailed the ending down. that apprehension meant so much to me, that willingness to follow the story- i could be reading into it idk, but i really value the trust that early readers had because, quite frankly, i don't think i had earned it. i also loved that they both couldn't decide what to think about tim and that they liked it- what i was portraying is messy and complicated and i think there's a really fine line there between stuff being ooc or frustrating or exhausting or dissatisfying with that kind of thing, so it was super !!!!! to have successfully walked that line for them!

but my favorite part of this comment is easily "the power of love is truly an ugly and beautiful thing...made me appreciate life". i don't really write romances, but the power of love is one of those things i end up wrestling with thematically a lot because it's just so captivating and it's one of those things i feel like i can't ever find the words for actually, i need you to just feel it and they felt it and- yeah. just yeah. and then writing/storytelling is something i use to help me appreciate life so overall just 🥹😭🫶 x1000

a time when writing was really, really hard: after i finished penance, rip. i got psyched out by all the positive attention and couldn't write 😅. there were plenty of times this year where i just wasn't trying to write so like i guess that was hard, but being paralyzed by overthinking when i had plenty of ideas and wanted to write Sucked. it's okay, i talked to my therapist finger guns

a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: slight penance spoilers lol, but in ch 3, the dick and tim hug surprised me. not that it happened, bc i knew it was going to, but i just had the image of the scene, yk, not like. how it would truly feel to be in dick's headspace in that moment. and omg. it just attacked me. i couldn't stop crying it was so frustrating. i'd pause to collect myself, come back and just nope. the scene is actually shorter than i originally envisioned bc i physically couldn't smh

a favourite excerpt of your writing: oh gosh. um um ummmmmm i really like this bit from ch 1 of penance-

this moment was just incredibly fun for so many reasons, not least of which is that i got to break tim for the first time 😇

how did you grow as a writer last year: i learned that i can, in fact, start and finish something that isn't a one shot. idk if my writing has improved on a technical level at all? but, despite it being a bit of a one step forward, two steps back thing at times, i do think i gained some confidence in my ability to write and that'll be really nice in the long run if i can, yk. take the steps forward without going back.

how do you hope to grow this year: by writing more. i want to actually write things instead of daydreaming and maybe getting down like twenty words and then never looking at it again. at my most ambitious, i build a habit.

who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc.): oh shoot. i got so much support from so many people i almost don't know where to start. i am so beyond grateful to everyone who has supported me, and i'm going to single out @a-canceled-stamp, @canonicallyshort, and @koraesrambles for enabling the crap out of me. love you guys sm!!!! (that extends to everyone not just those three ofc!!)

anything from your real life show up in your writing last year: the grieving process haha.

any new wisdom you can share with other writers: oh gosh ummmmmm. follow your gut. forget about audience, and rules, and whatever- if you know the story you want to tell, tell that story. just get it out. it deserves to be told.

any projects you’re looking to start (or finish) this year: the sequel to penance. my jason fic, my dick fic. i don't want to get ahead of myself or anything, but i hope i've got a handful of fics to look back on next year!!

no pressure tagging @sunflowersandink, @goldenraeofsun, @fleur-de-violette, @byrambles, and @elegitre (plus everyone already tagged)!!

[coweye]

Commitment Issues - Part 8

Pairing: Benjamin Miller x Reader

Words: 2.7k

Summary: When you try and take your friends with benefits relationship to the next level, Benny’s response isn’t quite what you were expecting.

AN: So I lied - I'm so sorry for the wait! Recently, writing hasn't come as easy to me and although it's almost a year late I hope you enjoy, this isn't the final chapter - I lied twice.

➢ fic masterpost

PREVIOUS PART

28th April 2022 - 37 weeks pregnant

Life playing host to the parasite that was soon to be your daughter had only gotten worse. Hard to believe, I know.

The gift that kept on giving made sure that you’d suddenly without any warning whatsoever have the overwhelming urge to vomit. 

There was no rhyme or reason to her neat new little party trick but at any given moment your stomach said nope and you bought up whatever you happened to have eaten or as the case may be; be eating at the time. 

Honestly, you weren’t a negative person by nature, but these agonizing eight months had taken it out of you. 

Hell, you were in the process of drafting an eviction notice if this kid didn’t get out of you in the next two weeks. 

Long story short, between this and the Benny situation you were not exactly the best of company, right now. 

The boys and Val had all learnt this early on and for the past eight days, you had given up all pretense of a brave face, now you were bleeding and letting everyone who would listen know about it.

When Santiago, who had decided to stay in town until the birth of your baby, suggested a stroll around the mall, you had fixed him with the stare that would have had a lesser man running back to Colombia with his tail between his legs. Until, of course, he had sweetened the deal with fried chicken, his treat and coincidentally the only meal that you had yet to regurgitate. 

So, here you found yourself with Santiago and William and a six piece bucket to yourself.

The change in company was a welcome distraction from dwelling on your non-existent love life at home with the love of your life. 

After the thorn in your side that was Jasmine, reared her ugly head at the baby shower, you had pulled back into your protective bubble of distant and cold. 

Benny, though confused about the message, received it loud and clear as he returned to the swing to find you inside and talking incredibly heatedly to Valerie. In the eight days that followed, he yet to confront you about it. Apparently old habits died hard.. 

The camaraderie that had come hand in hand with your truce had dissolved. You weren’t actively unpleasant, but you didn’t melt into his side, or nap on the couch with him anymore. 

You had established boundaries, resolving yourself to the simple philosophy of anything you wouldn’t do with Frankie, you wouldn’t do with Ben. 

It was simple… well kind of, every one of your moves was carefully calculated and exhausting.

For example, lying on the couch watching a movie with a leg rub? Acceptable. 

Frankie would do that for your swollen ankle joint, hell, he had done.

However, lying on the couch with his body sandwiched against yours as you fall asleep, the hardness of him pressed into your backside; well… that was quite clearly a no, but I digress! 

Boundaries were established and what almost was, had been completely and totally healthily avoided at all costs, creating the exact tenuous home environment you'd spent so long trying to avoid. 

So, here you found yourself in the food court, slamming some fried chicken trying desperately to forget your woes.

“She’s too clingy…” Santi huffed in between a bite of his burger, talking mostly to Will as you had yet to peak up from behind your bucket. 

“Maybe she just likes you and wants to spend time with you, god forbid someone shows interest.” You grunted irritably between bites, looking for a fight. 

Both men turned to you in surprise, the whites of their eyes visible as they feared your outburst. 

Santiago strategically paused as he searched for the right words before he began to speak again. 

“You’re right … Maybe I’m too harsh.” Pope placated as he fixed you with a look of reproach, however, that only served to enrage you further. 

He watched for your reaction as if you were an angry bear or a child throwing a tantrum. Truth be told, you weren’t strictly unlike either of those things at that precise moment. 

Your brows narrowed, ready to unload and tell him all the reasons he was a dick before a cramping pain in your bloated abdomen overwhelmed you. Your eyes clenched shut as you breathed heavily through your nose, your ringed fingers gripped at the circular table in pain. 

It was impossible for you to judge how long went by before the pain finally passed. 

You took a further second or two to even your breathing before you resumed eating, succinctly dropping the subject that had injected fire into your veins merely moments before. 

With a fry in your mouth, you glanced up to find both men watching you. 

“What the fuck?”

“Are you okay?” They questioned in unison. 

A moment passed as you swallowed your mouthful before you concisely answered your comrades. “I’m pretty sure I’m going into labor.” 

“And … you don’t think we should be actively doing something about that?” Santiago pressed, looking as if he was ready to bolt.

“Labor can take hours and I won't be able to eat once it gets going…” You shrug, picking up another piece of chicken. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Pope breathed, eyes wide before he palmed in his eye sockets in frustration, attempting to rub the stress you induced away.

Will had dragged his chair to your side, his eyes focused on his watch.

“Don’t worry so much… the book said until they're ten minutes apart … there’s no point going …  to the hospital!” You explain in between bites of greasy chicken. 

Your words do little to quell their panic as both men look as if they're ready to pull their hair out with worry. 

“I’ll ring Ben.” Santi groaned as he stood up and reached into his jacket pocket before fishing out his phone. He turned dramatically with a finger pointed in your general direction. “You get her to hurry up - I swear to god, Y/N. If you’re eating when I get back, pregnant or not, I’ll drag you to that car. You’re not having your baby in the damn food court… estúpida, obstinada…” The man continued grunting curses at your expenses as he stalked off for somewhere quiet with cell reception to call the father of your child.

The silence that extended all of three minutes was too good to be true as Will watched your face as you ate for any sign of distress. 

“Whilst giving Pope a coronary is always a good time… don’t you think we should go and get your bag and meet Ben?” Will’s voice was soft, the kind of soothing tone you’d seen him use to talk down shell shocked soldiers - it was both unassuming and laced with copious amounts of compassion. 

You’d be damned if it didn’t just piss you right off. 

With a quick shake of your head, you dropped the empty bone into the bucket with the rest of the carcasses and took a long sip of your drink. 

“I’m good here … I can meet you guys there if you like?”

The pinch in his brow was quite simply incredulous, his concern was quickly outweighing his patience. 

“If you think I’m leaving you both here, you’re insane.”

Chewing on the straw of your drink; your eyes locked with his. They were brimming with a concoction of confusion and concern, which if the clench in his jaw was anything to go by, was slowly morphing into exasperation at your lack of compliance. 

“I … just need some time.”

“Y/N. All you’ve spoken about for the past week is how you want this to be over, wish granted - she’s coming and she’s coming now.”

“That’s what he said…” You uttered half-heartedly under your breath as you broke eye contact, no longer able to face his look of bewilderment. 

On the red tray in front of you was a lemon scented wet wipe hidden among napkins and sauces, you tore open the former and gratuitously began scrubbing the grease off of your hands, actively ignoring the perplexed stare of one of your closest friends. 

“Y/N, we need to get moving… will you just stop and listen?” Will snapped finally as he grabbed the wipe from your grip as you passed over your digits for the third time. 

Your own patience had reached its end as his hand gripped your elbow, his intention to make good on Santiago’s threat and drag you out, clear and present in your mind.

The devil in question was making his way back to your table, all quick strides as he dodged the food courts clientele.

You wrenched your arm from his grip huffing in annoyance at the well meaning Miller. 

“Fine. Let's go and get my bag, maybe we can grab an iced tea on the way to the car…”

Will nodded but you knew the mother hen would never allow a diversion from the mission at hand. 

All was going well. 

You were compliant as you strode through the mall, both men flanking you like a high priority asset as you clambered into Santi’s rental truck.

Hell, you were goddamn amenable as you unlocked your front door and grabbed the hospital duffel bag from the cubby under the stairs. 

However, your cooperation waned somewhat when heading to the maternity ward as  the guys tried to wheel your chair past the hospital's Starbucks. 

Your palm, lightening fast, caught the break on the chair causing it to veer left right into Santiago’s shins.

“Ice Tea!”

“You’ve got a baby about to shoot out of your hoo-hah and you're stopping for tea?!” Santi huffed incredulously as he rubbed his shin.

“My contractions are 25 minutes apart, when they’re 15, I’ll consider joining the panicking cry baby club.” 

“Panicking baby- huh!” Santi huffed rubbing his forehead. “You are not well, Y/N/N! You’re having a baby - Go and have it and then I’ll bathe you in fucking tea!” 

“I’ll come back down and grab you one-” Will placated before Santi bent to remove the break on the chair, allowing Will to move all of two steps, before you slammed it back on, the rubber tyres screeched against the tile floor of the hospital lobby. 

“Tea. First.” You huffed much like a troublesome child. 

This time it was Will who leaned down to remove the break, having clearly decided you weren’t in your right mind.

So, you did the only thing you could; you threw your baby bag off of your lap. 

“Y/N, stop being a goddamn child!” Will huffed, you had clearly pushed him to the edge, not that it had been particularly hard. 

Ignoring him, you began to stand. They both watched on in horror as you slowly ambled your way to the end of the queue. 

Leaning against the drinks fridge, you sighed. 

Your spine was aching something awful. The poor timing of this kid resumed as a contraction wracked your body, sharper than the others, it felt longer but you had no way to be sure. 

Will was at your side the second it overcame your body.

“Twenty minutes apart, please, Y/N. Come on.”

When finally the pain dissipated, your aching back remained. You weren’t proud of the weight you were placing on Will but the floor was the only other option. 

“y/n?! … Y/N!” You heard Benny hollar before you saw him, his eyes were wild with panic as he rushed to your side. He patted his brother on the shoulder, before taking his place. “Baby, what are you doing? You need to get into bed.”

“I want… my … tea.” You huffed, breathing not yet evening out. 

“Fine, we get the tea and we go straight up. How far apart are they?”

“Twen-”

The gush of amniotic fluid leaving your body cut the older Miller off, soaking through your jeans and unfortunately onto Benny’s shoes.

“You just pissed, she just pissed!” Santi cried in disbelief, his hands an almost permanent fixture in his disheveled curls at this point. It was hard to believe this man was a pressure player.

“It's not piss, it's her waters. We need to go, I’m sorry baby, you can have all the ice tea you want when it's safe for you both.” He bent down and caught your sodden legs, picking you up in one sweep. 

If you weren’t currently covered in amniotic fluid, that story book firefighter carry would have set your loins ablaze. 

Who were you kidding? 

You were absolutely drenched in amniotic fluid and your loins were practically smoking. 

Between writhing in pain as your uterus contracted to eject a literal watermelon and lusting over your baby daddy who you had spent the last eight days practically snarling at every time he dared advance, the journey to your delivery suite had been all but a blur. 

Somehow all three men surrounded you, having coerced their way through the midwifery staff with their nefarious charm. 

“How ya’ doing champ?” Santi questioned as you huffed on the oxygen inhaler handed to you by your midwife. A thumbs up was all you could offer as you groaned through the contractions that were now give or take five minutes apart. 

“How about we use a bit of gravity?” The woman in control of the drugs questioned. A suggestion you were only more than happy to try.

Following her instructions and with minor assistance from Ben you were now on all fours, frantically inhaling the gas and air. 

“We’re going to need to clear the room, anyone who isn’t the father needs to leave.” 

You were so far gone, you didn’t care if they saw the business end of your cervix. All you knew was uncontrollable pain that wracked your body every five minutes like a sadistic egg timer. 

Ben wiped at your forehead with a damp towel as tears escaped. 

“You can do this, baby.”

“UGNGH.. It feels like I’m shitting a knife!” You cried as another contraction wracked your body. 

“Not long now, gorgeous. Then we’ll have our baby.”

“I’m not ready.” You cried burying your face in the reclined back of the bed. You couldn’t look him in the eyes.

“You are-”

“No. We’re not ready. Things were … supposed to be fixed… I promised her.”

“Wha-”

“ you stupid fucking idiot. I want to be with you; I have done for like ten years…  smitten with you from the second I heard your tone deaf ass singing that … crappy hick song on base. Ungh… And everything is so broken because I don’t want you … to just stay for the Bean, I want to be with you … because you want to be with me.” You cried, tears wracking your body as uncontrollably as the contractions.

“It’s all broken… I promised her and I fucked it all up. You … and Jaz can just live happily ever-” You cut yourself off with a low wail as another contraction wracked your body. It seemed to knock Benny out of his stupor as his hand rubbed your lower back.

It was a moment before you leveled out and remembered you were divulging your innermost thoughts but a moment ago, though you couldn’t find it in you to care. 

Bigger fish to fry, and all that.

“I adore you, even if you are the goddamn most stubborn fuckin’ idiot I’ve ever met. You're the mother of my baby, yeah. It scares the crap outta me. Caring for you. Damn near spent three months thinking up all the reasons we couldn’t be together cause it scared me so bad.” He huffed, stroking your hair. He helped you reposition on your back, as you breathed in another wave of oxygen. “I- I don’t do this. I don’t do relationships … because this feeling in my stomach when I think of you is fuckin awful. Sure I get the tingles when you smile at me or stroke my arm. But ninety-nine percent of the time, fucking nightmare, I worry if you’re happy, if you’ve eaten and now we’re adding an whole ass entire other person into this fucking clown show.”

“Gee… thanks.” You huffed in between breaths of gas and air. 

Ben chuckled as he pushed the sweat sodden hair back from your brow. He leaned forward, pressing his mouth against yours, the kiss was brief and nowhere near what was needed but it was all you could manage. 

It was enough, you thought at that moment.

The promise, that everything wasn’t lost, there was hope ahead, it carried you through.

Next Part

@sixshooter665 @queenie-b- @rambling-in-purple @anaaaispunk @miraclesabound @kravitzwhorehore @ahsokathearcher @xoxabs88xox @heresathreebee @psychadelichue @marauderskeeper @tanzthompsonn @mermaidxatxheart

[yuyulie]

Feel free to ignore everyone but I've just been looking at some of the things I made over the years and its so many things I gave up on lmao 😭😭 I see a bunch of things online, go and recreate them in MD/Blender and most of the time they either don't work in game or the textures look like shit 💀💀 so if anyone wants to see them, check down below 👇🏽👇🏽

Had to go in the whatsapp chat archives with my irl to find this BUT THIS WAS MY FIRST MESH from back in sept 2022 apparently? I was soooooooo proud of myself this took me literally like a week bc of the weights and then the textures and I used the fuck outta this top in my game, every sim of mine was wearing it 🙂‍↕️ lmao but i took a break from the sims in jan '23 bc of my internship and when I came back I was like "OMG this looks like SHIT???

I'll be honest I don't remember ever opening this in game 😭 but apparently this top was like 20k~ polys??? Crazy times

NGL i feel bad abt deleting the first top since i made it for a tiktok cc process vid and people asked me when i was planning on releasing and i was like yea soon 😊 then never did shjdbhjdbfds

THE SANDALS WERE MY FIRST EVER PAIR OF SHOES but the straps would disappear when i made the sims feet bigger 😭 but its fine now i (kinda) learned how to make (very simple) shoes now so maybe ill post some soon 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽

The hat was cute but in cas my sims would get the question mark when i put it on them i don't know why?? and the bikini belt thing was just meh so i got rid of it

The first top was also my favorite for awhile but the weights were kinda weird, everything else also had the same problems and honestly im glad they did bc they were all ugly af, SUPER high poly and just looked like caca in game thank god i deleted them (there were more things i made in between this and the next pic im abt to show but i don't have any pics soooo)

This hello kitty necklaces I was so proud of and I made SO MANY SWATCHES (18!!!) but bc i always rush to finish everything before getting in game, when i finally checked them they looked real nice im ngl BUT the morphing was sooo bad on small beads😭😭 they looked even worse on the masc frames RIP

I don't have the ref I used for this anymore but it was a really cute bonnet, mine just looked like a crumbled piece of paper plus its from last year so I didn't know how to retopologize or how to sculpt in Blender

This was supposed to come out with one of the simblreen gifts but again I didn't like the morphs but I did use the base of the cross for my other cross necklaces so i guess not completely useless 🤞🏽🤞🏽

Still proud of the lighter but I don't know what I was going for 😪

The mp3 was so fun to make but the weights were kinda weird and I didn't know how to fix them 🙄 (I did ended up using the earphones for the folasade collection 👌🏽)

Both were supposed to come out in the denim set BUT the more I looked at the pants the less I liked them and the skirt I just felt like it didn't belong with the jeans I did release?? its a cute skirt but I haven't felt like releasing it so 🚶🏽‍♀️🚶🏽‍♀️

I made this back when I wasn't mindful of where tops should stop/where the bottom part starts if u don't want any clipping to happen (looking at the heroine top since it also had the same issue but I realised wayyy too late so couldn't go back and fix it LMAO) still its a cute top and I feel like I could fix it in sculpt mode now??? idk

Very high poly 😭

PINKPANTHERESS MY LOVE ♥♥♥ ( I made this around the time I started the follower set so I just kinda forgot abt it, maybe one day I'll go back n finish it)

I think this was the original idea I had for heroine top? I gave up on it bc I just knew the buttons were gonna morph horribly since they sit right on the chest (also i never realised how similar it was to the tiktok top lol)

Ok after this, all the pics are from stuff that was supposed to be on the follower set but this was the original mesh for the dee top and I had to remake it since I couldn't find tops with sleeves of that size to transfer weights from 😭😪 (if that makes sense)

THIS JUST DID NOT LOOK LIKE THE REF 💀💀💀 plus the 'flower' is soooooo bad 😭 sorry to whoever added this pic to the pinterest board I flopped so hard 😖

I just thought the quality of the textures was poor so I didn't even wanna put it up for download 💔 the jean quality I could definitely do better but the sheep patch/stitch(??idk) I couldn't find a clear high quality pic so yea 😪

i LOVED this one but kept having so many problems with it, first the dress was flying off the sim in cas, fixed that then the weights started acting up it was problem after problem lmao maybe one day ill sit down and take a look at it again

Cute skirt but the transparent/lace part would clip a lot

the pants would clip out of the skirt when sims walked and i was very confused since i obviously deleted parts of the jeans that aren't visible but that didn't work so idk

I also loved this headband but it was kinda hard to find a hair that would fit without clipping, if i ever find one I would definitely put it up for download 👆🏽👆🏽

It looks alright in sims4studio (i guess) but in game the textures were kinda blurry

CUTE but i forgot that buttons on the chest have shitty weights/uv's🤐

Thats all for now, I made so many other things but most of the time I just delete them bc i don't have the ability to make them work in game 😞plus I can't stand having files on my pc that im not using bc otherwise they r just taking up space 🤞🏽

[aurora-313]

I've been openly critical of Thousand Year Blood War since its weekly manga release way back in late 2010s. It was so immemorable that I'd legitimately forgotten it, and by extension Bleach, existed until the announcement in 2022.

The revelations presented require so much backreading and contradicts earlier established facts, it make it difficult to tolerate. Interpersonal reveals reflect incredibly poorly on many characters, demonstrating in some cases outright negligent tendencies in their duty of care towards others and themselves.

(Masaki, Isshin, you don't have to tell him everything but its not hard to teach your god-child basic safety and the supernatural equivalent of 'don't run in oncoming traffic'. The fact neither did of you did, makes you damned irresponsible parents imo. Almost like your powers were retconned into existence without thinking through the rammifications, huh?).

The sum total of my issues are too numerous to mention but my biggest issue is theme of fate in Bleach; how it applies to Ichigo's desire for self-determination and how TYBW in particular gleefully pisses all over that.

While fate and destiny can be aspiring things, they are by definition traps. Confines. Set parameters that must be fulfilled. As a result two primary attitudes exist in response; one must rise to meet the occasion gloriously or defy it to forge one's own path (success varies).

Ichigo's opinion has always fallen into the latter category.

Ichigo wanted to destroy fate. Wanted to negate its unfairness. To remove its strangling shackles from his life and those he cares for. To quote:

If fate is a milestone, then we are the grist. There is nothing we can do. So I wish for strength. If I cannot protect them from the wheel, then give me a strong blade, and enough strength... to shatter fate.

In essence this is how Ichigo wants express his agency and self-determination, by protecting others. He wants to defend the downtrodden from the unfairness ugliness of reality. An agency he gains through obtaining Shinigami power from Rukia.

Or so he believes.

Problem is, every arc and especially TYBW exposes that theme as a total lie.

Whenever Ichigo believes he's expressing agency to combat whatever ill fortunate awaits those he wishes to protect, he is in fact playing into the hands of others.

He believes he's making an active choice to defend and guard and protect, but in reality Ichigo has never had a choice in anything, merely the illusion of one. Worst of all Ichigo never realizes most of his choices are illusions.

With every subsequent arc, the sad truth is that Ichigo is enslaved to fate. Shackled to its designs since the dawn of reality. Enchained by the literal gods and devils on his shoulder. At one point, fate even turns Ichigo's own body against him as his Quincy blood forces him to slay the previous Soul King.

In his drive to break fate's confines, Ichigo becomes its ultimate poster boy and enforcer.

But in a sad yet classic prophetic twist; Ichigo believes he's actively fighting an unfair destiny.

A destiny written by the Soul King's Almighty eons ago.

In a word, the Almighty is omniscience. First held by the Soul King and later Yhwach.

Conceptually, omniscience and free will cannot co-exist. The world is self-determination or pre-destination. There's no middle ground.

This in mind; the Soul King knew precisely how he would die. He knew a Shiba scion would eventually gain the power to release him from his torment eons upon eons after his sealing under the compulsion of Yhwach's Quincy blood, then slay Yhwach to replace him.

In other words, Ichigo's desire for self-determination was the greatest lie of this story. His every action and reaction were predicted and cemented since the dawn of time. Taken to its logical extreme, Ichigo arguably had no free will at all (absolutely fitting because he reads like a damn automaton in the last arc). He's a pre-programmed organic robot blindly following the path set before him by his creators, there's no error codes (ie. questions or hesitations) because his programmers told him exactly the right command prompts to set him loose.

And almost as the ultimate spit in the face for Ichigo's futile wish for agency in his own fate? Yhwach curses him in the end. Cursed Ichigo with a prophesy that at the moment of his greatest happiness, Yhwach will return to crush it to dust.

Meaning Ichigo is now destined to carry that curse for the rest of his days, his days as a human, his days as a soul, possibly even after his soul death and winding up in hell.

By the avatar of fate's own command, Ichigo is never permitted to find true happiness again.

Which actually rather neatly explains why Ichigo seemingly retired from shinigami work after the war concluded. And a rather damning indication of his marriage to Orihime and his own son.

When is Ichigo at his happiest? When he's engaged with the spirit world. What's he done in the ten year timeskip? Cut himself off from the spirit world. When does Yhwach show up again? The first time Ichigo engages with the spirit world after ten long years.

All told, its a rather tragic tale, isn't it?

Then again, I suppose that could be Kubo's intention. The more Ichigo tries to fight fate, the more fate bitch slaps him and tells him 'get back in your lane.' And Ichigo, after years of being thoroughly defanged, bows his head and obeys.

If that's so, then I congratulate him on delivering such a tragic despair-filled message.

[crazykuroneko]

Joining the Rewind the Tape event

This will be my first time rewatching IWTV S1 since it's first broadcast (excluding the indirect watch I get from watching YouTube reactions). I'm bad at creating content, but I have been meaning to rewatch it the same way I watch movies; with my note app ready for me to write down things I notice. And like when watching movies, I don't really care about source material nor the existing theories; I just try to deduce from what I see. So, I feel this is a good way to refresh my mind before going into S2 after all the fanons and theories going around. I use my note to decide how I score a film, so I write down technical stuff as well.

If anyone wants to discuss, feel free to reply ✌️

Here is my note for S01E1:

• What a witty opening. Tricking audience that it's something it's not (an ad, which is closer to our reality). Setting the tone of what's to come.

• "Your sources are your Sherpas (a guide?). Your editor is your priest. Honesty is not a tactic."

• "Can he make his fantasy a reality?" Touche!

• 9/4/73. 4 September 1973

• Daniel looks so pissed listening to the old tape lol.

• That transition of Louis' face over the city. That's so Great Gatsby of him. And the long close shot makes Louis so still and inhuman, what a contrast with the ones from the church scene.

• "Have I hit the nerve?" Drink every time the script being so funny!

• Louis: "Yet you come anyway". Daniel: "That's my voice but I don't remember it" 

• "Truth and reconciliation" Reconciliation: the process of making two opposite beliefs, ideas, or situations agree.

• June 14, 2022.

• "The favored son. And capital to oversee as consequence"

• "You're a pimp". "The product is desire" The difference in their language in this dialogue is so interesting.

• Bricks hitting Fenwick after he tried to rape her. That's our girl 😌✊

• The score came up on the right time.

• Lestat witnessing and hearing the contradiction in Louis over loving his brother versus going hard on him in order to survive and falling in love immediately 😌✊✊✊✊

• "Let's not fuss on the particulars" Particulars in question are women being exploited and sometimes raped, but okay. 

• Florence and Grace don't like to hear the hard facts, I see. 

• "A lie I told myself about myself"

• No that white man Louis staring at is so ugly. Louis, please!

• Oh, Les definitely hears Tom inviting Louis for a game on Friday.

• "And there's a food" *gestures to Lily*. God, i love this script.

• Oh, Lestat did "mezmerized" Louis here (either accidentally or not idk), like he did with Paul later at the dinner. Hence, Louis says "not with my family".

• "Emasculation AND admiration in equal measure. I wanted to murder the man, and I wanted TO BE the man." Basically a summary of what attracts Louis to Lestat. 

• Lestat killing the white man with lamp scene is interesting if you consider what we watch as Louis' POV because logically Louis didn't see it as it happened in 1910. But the existence of this scene signals that 2022 Louis (or Louis after the fact) now knows that Lestat did prowling the city during the night killing people. Iirc there will be more scenes like this.

• Help Sam and Jacob's chemistry right when their eyes meet each other 😭😭😭😭♥️

• Not @ Lestat dumbing himself down in front of the white men and Louis smiled adorably over it even though he probably knew that's just an act. We lost him so fast

• The practical effects are so cool.

• Lestat was like don't you know your value etc etc, yet he still did not back up Louis to Fenwick. The red flag is red flagging.

• "He's not revealed his vampire nature yet." But Louis definitely knows something is up with him (see: two instances of "mezmerize" and the time stop)

• That shot of Leslou in the mirror at the tailor is so cute 🥺

• "Mother loves European" Louis is so her son 😂

• "He ain't takin' it you getting married" Paul was indeed getting worse 😭

• Lestat being so taken aback with how blunt Paul is then taken aback over Louis' lying to his family he's not enjoying opera is so funny. 

• Sam's eyebrows definitely have a life of their own lol

• Louis gives Lestat's "violent and weird peculiarity" a pass unless it's toward his loved ones. Reminds me of that Jacob's interview on the domestic abuse in the show.

• The talk Leslou have while walking back to Lestat's house is really the summary of Louis' different "hats". "They sit in judgement. Paul is the only one to say it to my face"

• Louis' action vs words when Lestat asked him for a "nightcap" is 🤌

• I thought Lestat's hand is in Lily's skirt when she seemingly orgasm, but it isn't. His hand also doesn't explore too much on her at Fairplay Saloon either compared to what Louis' narration implies. Is it the show being careful how they touch women or is it some kind of "censor"? I need to pay attention to it later.

• The choreo between Leslou to make it look like they're fighting for control/dominance. This is A grade yaoi 🤌🤌🤌🤌

• Louis checking on Daniel whether he has ~ embraced his sexuality~ then describing his homosexual intimate moment with drugs to a former addict is a very deliberate choice. Daniel isn't the only one digging in this interview.

• Drinking blood from another in an intimate setting feels extremely intimate

• Gosh Paul doesn't even want Levi to touch him

• The tap dance scene 😭 Paul 😭

• Paul spiralling down pre-wedding, seemingly angry during the wedding, eating a lot, remembering their best time, checking on Louis and Grace, saying I love you. Yeah, he definitely did it himself 🥲

• I know the night sky is a green screen, but the lights hit Louis' face so beautifully. I don't know how they did it 

• Florence 😡😡😡😡

• "Miss Lily proved herself a poor subtitute" Lestat 😡😡😡😡😡

• Lestat is completely out of touch with humanity, he only cares about himself.

• Finnick must think it's very weird that he has to keep Lestat away from Louis that he gets his arm broken but the next time they meet, Leslou are close again 😅

• Daniel Hart slaying with the score 🤌🤌🤌🤌

• Louis connects the dots when he hears Lily got the "fever" 😞

• Jacob's acting at the confession. The score filling the space over his voice. The mixing tuned up perfectly when Lestat snatching the priest. 🤌

• Lestat knocked down two lamps, one is so far away from the confession, to give proper lighting is so funny lol. (I know it's shooting necessity but still 😂)

• Sam definitely has a subwoofer in his throat wtf (I'm listening with earphones)

• You can see Sam hasn't used to talk with his fangs on here.

• The camera trick after Lestat punched the priest is so clever.

• I wonder what Lestat is hearing during his proposal scene, because he definitely gets Louis the moment he says he loves him. The change in Louis' face 🥲

• Sam's eye acting during the part laid over with Louis' narration. That part will always be my Roman Empire 

• "For the first time in my life, I was seen". Not "felt seen". He's still sure that that's a fact. 

• Louis already gives little nods the moment Lestat finished "for eternity" 🥲🥲🥲🥲

• Jacob's whole monologue during the turn 🤌🤌🤌

• "He sat there, radiant" *while Lestat's is laying down, catching his breath* Louis' narration is more "flowery" than the recollection?

Summary: I'm extremely impressed with how much we know about Louis' personality (especially the contradiction in himsef) just from the script of this episode. Alan Taylor trusts Jacob and Sam's ability a lot to do a lot of close-ups and just let their faces tell the story. Louis' costumes, scores, and audio mixing are perfection.

[she-karev]

Gender Reveal (Andrew DeLuca x Alex Karev’s Sister)

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: One of One

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

Ship: Andrew DeLuca x Amber Karev (Alex Karev’s Sister)

Summary: Amber has her 22-week ultrasound with Andrew where they find out the sex of their baby.

Words: 1419

August 3rd, 2022

“Life at The Burrow was as different as possible from life in Privet Drive.” Andrew reads out loud Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets in bed leaning down face to pregnant stomach. Amber is sitting up reading a fetal development book while her husband tries to get their unborn child to sleep inside her womb for the night.

Ever since the baby started kicking two weeks ago Amber has grown restless due to the baby kicking at all hours of the night. She found out quickly that Andrew speaking to the baby helps put it to sleep. So, every night she gives him a book for him to read to the baby which he does without hesitation knowing his wife gets crankier when she doesn’t get her beauty rest.

“The Dursleys liked everything neat and ordered; the Weasleys’ house burst with the strange and unexpected. Harry got a shock the first time he looked in the mirror over the kitchen mantelpiece and it shouted, ‘Tuck your shirt in, scruffy!’”

“Did you know that at 22 weeks the baby’s hair starts to form?” Amber says intrigued from reading her book, “So there is someone else’s hair inside me right now. Along with lungs, ears, a head and a tiny body. It’s freaky. I wonder if this is how most mothers think or I’m just uniquely morbid.”

“Do you want me to answer that honestly?” Andrew asks causing Amber to raise an eyebrow down at him, “Has the baby finally gone to sleep?”

“For the moment.”

Andrew sighs in relief closing the book, “Thank god I was getting worried I was gonna have to read till birth.”

“You should be so lucky Chamber of Secrets has a twist you and the baby will never see coming.” Amber closes her book to get ready for sleep placing a pillow between her legs while lying on her side, “My ultrasound is tomorrow, are you gonna make it this time or am I gonna have to tweedle my thumbs impatiently again?”

“I will make it this time I swear.” Andrew moves to spoon Amber from the back looping his arm around her stomach and kissing the side of her head, “We get to find out the sex, do you want to?”

“Of course I do, gender neutral paints are ugly and they’ll probably make the baby vomit. Do you have a preference? Boy or girl?”

“Healthy will do.” Andrew says with conviction, “What about you? Are you hoping for a girl to play dolls with or a boy to do laser tag with?”

“Who says girls don’t like laser tag? Keep up with the times buddy.”

Andrew chuckles, “Still are you secretly hoping for one or the other?”

“Well I grew up with two brothers so that made me eager to have a girl to play with.” Amber scrunches her face as another thought comes to her, “But I’ve had practice handling boys too so it should be a breeze if we have a little Theo.”

Andrew furrows his eyebrows, “Theo?”

“Yeah, Theodore was like family to me and naming kids after beloved family members is the way to go.”

Andrew chuckles, “Yeah but Theodore’s not a family name, Theodore was the name of a stray cat you fed scraps to from time to time.”

“I didn’t have any grandparents.” Andrew grins caressing his wife’s pregnant belly, “What about you? Any good grandfather names?”

“Um Michelangelo and Leonardo?”

Amber raises an eyebrow at him behind her, “So we’ll name our kid after a teenage mutant ninja turtle?”

Andrew rolls his eyes, “5 years together and you still don’t know the names of famous Italian artists? How did you get me to marry you again?”

“It was either you or a random resident.” Amber snaps causing Andrew to mock groan.

“Wow those hormones make you more capable of kicking a man down. Maybe I should have invested in a bomb shelter after all.”

Amber chuckles before folding her hand into Andrew’s that is spread out across her stomach. They fall asleep in each others arms cocooned into the lull of the night anxious for the ultrasound tomorrow and how the baby is doing.

The Next Day

“Have you been taking it easy at work?” The OB, Linda, asks Amber DeLuca who is laying down on the table in her bright pink scrubs that are stretched out due to her pregnant belly. Since the residency program is shut down Amber has decided to take up Jo’s offer to transfer to the OB department for the time being.

She feels it’s not as challenging as surgery, but Amber acknowledges that it’s a relaxing position for her while she is pregnant. Also she can see up close how other parents prepare for their impending baby that proves to be helpful due to this being her first.

However, she finds it annoying that she has to wait for Andrew at every appointment due to being held up at surgery. She is both envious that he gets to cut and peeved that he can’t find the time to go to these appointments with her even though he insists she schedules them every time. As if he heard her thoughts he rushes inside with a remorseful look.

“Hey, I’m sorry I’m late, the nurse took too long to prep without a resident, but I am here and I swear this is the last time I will be late.”

Amber purses her lips, “Yeah, I heard that at the last ultrasound. I’m telling you right now if you show up late to the birth I’ll throw the amniotic sac at you.”

Linda clears her throat and they turn to her, “As I was saying to your wife, have you been taking easy like I suggested? Less hours? Less stress?”

“OB isn’t surgery, so it’s pretty laid back, all I do is show up hold my hands out and catch. I’m essentially a football player in horribly colored scrubs.” Amber says bitterly causing Andrew to grin down at her.

“Well, I think you look good in pink, better than either of our sisters. Don’t tell them I told you that though, next to you they scare me the most.”

Amber grins shaking her head, “I can already see which one of us is gonna be the disciplinarian. Can we get this show on the road? I’m dying to know if I’m carrying a little Andrew or Andrea.”

“Andrea is a very popular boys name in Italy for your information. But yes we want to know so we can get to work on baby names.” Andrew stands by watching as the OB squeezes gel on Amber’s exposed stomach before waving the wand around. They watch the screen to their right that Linda operates excitedly as a visual of their baby shows up on the screen.

The blurry black and white images would look nonsensical to a normal couple. But for doctors like Andrew and Amber they immediately recognize all of the parts of their baby that appear in front of them. Andrew looks at the image amazed as does Amber who smiles at it.

“Okay I see a head, there’s only one.” Amber confirms inspecting her child, “How’s the heart?”

“BP is normal, you can even see the little heart beating right there, do you see it?” Linda points it out.

Andrew sees the little heart, “Wow, look at that. Hey, I think I can see the liver, stomach and kidneys.”

“Yes, and they are functioning very nicely but that’s to be expected from having a general surgeon daddy.” Andrew grins holding Amber’s hand.

“Everything’s okay? Everything’s in the right places and working perfectly?” Amber asks Linda.

“Yep, your baby is perfectly fine, and she is perfectly happy given how much she’s kicking in there.”

Amber and Andrew widen their eyes at that with Andrew asking in a low voice, “She? We’re having a girl?”

Linda smiles at their expression, “Yep, that’s your daughter in there.”  

Amber gasps looking down at her gorging belly overcome with knowing she is carrying a girl. Andrew chuckles lightly spreading his palm across her belly happy to know he’s having a healthy daughter with the woman he loves.

Amber smiles at the news, “We’re having a girl, oh wow we’re having a girl.” The couple laugh in unbridled joy before he kisses her, and she responds holding his hand over her belly that is carrying their daughter who keeps kicking as if she is celebrating with them.

[ewesless]

Barbatos Costumes: The Good, The Bat

Okay! The Good, the Bat and the Ugly is a go!

Demon form! 10/10 My favorite Demon form and in my not at ALL humble opinion his is the most unique and interesting. That 300 raven was a total pain and took over a year to save up because of emergency vouchers. Silly beginner me had the lofty goal of getting everyone's Akuzon costumes when I started the game.

Continues at length under there

I wasn't into the ruffles, initially, but over time I've come to adore them. I hate drawing this costume. He's so freaking pretty 😫 His design is so stylish! I thought his spooky little horns resemble fossilized wings (Which are totally not like Handia's lol) and that made me wonder if he is much older than the others (lol yes) or if he has ancient Demon features. His long tail evokes amphibian and serpent and is a fresh twist on the traditional forked tail. On that subject I have never had the chance to hold an amphibian, so would his tail be super smooth, warm and slick like...the interior of the mouth or more like a cold, wet puppy nose? Lukewarm? I wonder if due to its nature that he has a special beauty routine/hygiene for his tail or if there is a degree of self cleansing. Does the "glistening sheen" have any rumors of psychedelic or magic effects? Does it get drippy?

Dame It's OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAND it just needs a nice tight corset! Dame opportunity, heh

Goth Card already discussed, but it's a solid 1000/100

Arabian Look 8.5/10

Already discussed, but GOD. He is practically naked, the Barbie toes, the shoulders, the fingerless opera length gloves, THAT WAIST AND LOW CUT TOP. The pashmina bulking out his hips in that weird bow and dragging around on the ground subtracted points.

Bonus Harem Butler. H0mos3xual hedonism unquestionably happened after this photo and Demonus was finished 😏

Animal Look 8/10

This was the first costume I could unlock for him! I love it! I love anything that gives him the illusion of an hourglass figure. The outfit looks so soft and cute and his big ol' adorable ears having cute fluffs is one time I'm not a stickler about accuracy. It would have an 9/10 (by Obey Me standards) but those high heel sneakers pain me so much. His tail being under his coat made him immune during Tail Thieves even if he was a target. But it also hides his long r-a-t like tail lmao Otherwise it's a Turn around~ Turn your ass back around~ I like his little hip peek. On his sprite his nails are unpainted, but in the chat art his nails are.

Happy Devil Day 2022 7.5/10

THIS is Ruffle Maxxing. It's an unusual color choice for him, but he rocks it. The big bow kind of detracts from it, but I adore stars.

Most Beautiful of Baby Girls

Vampire Hunter 7/10

Already discussed, but he should be a Magical Girl. He loves Burgundy, but rarely gets to wear it so I know he jumped on the opportunity with both feet. His ruffles and nipped in vest are 💖

Human World 7/10

Not a lot to say, I dig the contrasting soles!

Yokai 7/10

I wonder if Levi feels even more inadequate. 🤔Barbatos's serpent tail is THICK.

HDD 2021 Card Version 8.5/10

I love the card version SO MUCH. It's beautiful! I love his hands with Diavolo's. I hope they danced until they were dizzy and laughing their tipsy/drunk butts off

Baby Girl, Baby 😢 I wonder why his tail is so bright though? Surely that a specific meaning?

Part 2 next!