#thayd be a lot in one day

[dumb-doll-lips]

Oh there definitely would be a lot of fucking. I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you if you walking around in garter and stockings all day. My friends wouldn’t be able to keep their hands off you either 😜😜

Ooooo yes please oh like my sex to do list has being w more then one guy at a timee high on the lost. Thayd be sooo fun

Currently sharing links to control the lush and hush I’m wearing for 5 min when I answer asks

Prolly taking a tiny break after his one. This hush is dying lots so i think im gonna seitch to a different plug. And like refill my water and stuff. Being like too needy for this to end yet lol.

[skyward-floored]

Hyrule Warriors - oneshot

Hello there, I’m sick and not up for much, so I’m crossposting some oneshots from my zelink/other ships fic on ao3 that never made it to tumblr :) (which are also technically courage of ages but shhhh)

Anyway, first up is Hyrule Warriors! Them <3

————————————————————

“What’s up buttercup?”

Zelda rolled her eyes at the call that came from her balcony, getting up with an eagerness rather contrary to the exasperated expression she wore.

Strolling outside, she looked up the wall where the voice had come from, putting a hand on her hip as she saw Link dangling from a ledge several feet up. He was hard to see, silhouetted by the setting sun, but his scarf flared out behind him and made him easier to spot.

“You I’d have to guess,” she answered dryly, and felt her heart flutter when she made out Link grinning at her.

He then began climbing his way down the vines growing along the side of the castle, slowly so as not to slip. Zelda watched him climb for a moment, wincing when he missed a foothold and slipped a bit anyway.

“You could have come through the door you know,” she suggested as he clambered down, “less general risk to life and limb.”

“Too many people around,” he replied, landing with a flourish a few feet away from her. “Would’ve been too many questions.”

She smiled at his dramatic entrance, rolling her eyes as he bowed.

“One of your better landings,” she teased, and Link gave her a winning smile, then promptly tripped over a loose stone.

Zelda let out a laugh as he flailed, only barely managing to catch himself and not face-plant. He leaned casually on the railing around the balcony, and pointedly ignored the fact that his scarf was twisted oddly around his leg.

“I meant to do that.”

“Mm.”

Zelda began to walk back into her room, and Link followed her, trying to shake out his leg without her noticing. “I did!”

“Of course, hero.”

She sat back down at her desk, with Link a few steps behind her, letting out a yawn as she picked up her pen again and went back to filling in the documents.

“And what fun-filled paperwork are we doing this evening?” Link asked, leaning over and completely blocking her light. She swatted him with her writing instrument, and he pulled back, giving her another grin. She somehow managed to hold in her amusement at the large smear of ink across his nose he didn’t notice, looking back at her desk with a small sigh.

“Only a hundred or so papers that need my signature.” She tried to make sure it wasn’t a complaint, but the tiredness leaked out through her voice anyway. “I’ve been at it all afternoon, I swear that stack has multiplied.”

Link looked at the large pile of papers still sitting on her desk, and the playfulness faded from his eyes.

“You need to get out for a bit?” he asked gently.

Zelda sighed again and shook her head. Goodness did she ever.

“I wish I could. But I’ve got to finish these, and there’s a meeting tonight as well. If we go anywhere I won’t have enough time to come back and prepare,” she said disappointedly.

Link’s brows lowered a bit. “Council meeting?”

Zelda rubbed her forehead, feeling a headache coming on at the mere thought of it. “Yes. It should just be business as usual. We’re supposed to discuss farming communities affected by the war and how to provide assistance for those worst hit, but...”

“...But?”

Zelda sighed. “They’ve been bringing up marriage again.”

Link’s face turned worried, though it held an equal amount of outrage along with it. The council hated him, and the feeling was definitely mutual, but recently their vendetta against Link had gotten much more personal. They were now trying to convince Zelda she needed to marry as soon as possible, and any suitors had to be royalty.

Which Link was not.

“Again? I thought Impa had gotten them off your back about that,” he muttered, an edge to his voice.

“She had. But since she’s checking on those monsters by the Lost Woods they must figure they can get away with it,” she groaned, “if I have to hear about how rich Prince Roalphu of Labrynna is again I may just bring my rapier along.”

Link didn’t laugh at her words like he usually would, instead going quiet.

Zelda went quiet as well, watching as Link seemed to think something over. His mouth was pressed in a worried line, wrinkling the scar on his jaw, and when he looked back up his expression was surprisingly gentle.

“Zelda...” he finally spoke in a soft voice. “You don’t have to marry anyone you don’t want to, you know that right?”

Zelda looked at him seriously, feeling her heart ache. “I know. But Hyrule might need me to.”

Silence fell between them.

Zelda looked down at the parchment in front of her, running a tired hand across her eyes. Of course she didn’t want to marry any of the pompous idiots her council kept recommending to her, they were all numbskulls who cared nothing for her or for Hyrule as a whole. But the truth was that the kingdom wasn’t in the best of shapes after such a disruptive and messy war, and funds were on the low side of things.

And if marrying a pompous idiot could help with that, then she’d put aside her own feelings and do what she had to.

She sighed yet again, and felt Link slip his hand into hers, giving it the gentlest of squeezes. She squeezed back and looked up, meeting his bright blue eyes.

“Sorry,” she apologized quietly. “You snuck in here to visit me and here I am just complaining.”

“It’s alright,” Link replied, his voice gentle. “I get it. I imagine it’s worse without Impa around.”

“It is,” Zelda admitted in a whisper.

Link squeezed her hand again, then leaned in, gently bumping his head with hers. She leaned in as well and he gave her a smile.

“Well, we may not have time to sneak out, but we could always do something here,” he suggested, changing the subject.

Zelda raised a suspicious eyebrow. “Oh yes? Like what?”

His eyes twinkled.

“Game of chess?”

Zelda stared at him, her brows narrowing. “Link that never ends well.”

He smirked, twirling her pen he’d somehow stolen. “Sounds like you’re just afraid you’ll lose.”

Zelda knew exactly what he was trying to do, and hated that he knew her well enough that he knew it’d work. Both of them were excellent strategists, so much that games of chess could get rather heated at times. They were about even in ability as well, so it was never a given which one of them would win.

And Link knew fully well a game always cheered her up.

She sighed and poked his chest with her finger. “Fine. One game. But then I get back to work.”

Link smiled at her, his eyes still twinkling maddeningly.

“Of course your highness.”

(...)

Zelda fell asleep halfway through their third game.

Link smiled at her head resting on the edge of the chessboard, hair having knocked over several pieces while a rook pressed up against her cheek in a way that couldn’t have been comfortable.

He gently tugged it out, deftly replacing it with a pillow he borrowed from her bed, then draped a blanket over her as well.

As suited as Zelda was to the stress of battles and the split-second decisions that arose from them, politics and their stressors were a whole other deal, one that wore her out more then Link knew she’d ever admit. And this kind of stress always made her sleepy, which he also knew would win out the moment she felt like she could relax a little.

She shifted a little and he smiled, fixing the blanket around her shoulders.

He glanced over at the pile of papers on her desk, and twirled Zelda’s pen thoughtfully in his fingers as he wandered closer to the stack. He’d seen her sign hundreds of things like this... maybe he could lighten her load a bit.

Forging signatures may have technically been illegal, but in this case Link was willing to bend the rules a bit. Zelda would certainly do the same for him.

He nodded to himself, decision made, pressed a kiss to Zelda’s forehead, and cracked his knuckles and got to work.

(...)

By the time Zelda woke up for her meeting, he was gone, nothing but a complete pile of signed documents and a smear of ink on her desk to show he’d ever been in the room.

[rogerbriden]

Dreamscape

Part 2

Roger had seen some strange things in his lifetime, none of which he remembered. But he still felt he had. This one had to be the biggest and most noticeable one by far, however.

Algoroc, known for its sunny plains and herds of wild roan that had wandered into the area from Galeras or because they were brought from space… endless sky, mountainous clouds and wild flowers as far as the eye could see.

A picture perfect scene for any space-cowboy.

Only…

A hard line separated this piece of land from the rest. He could still SEE what lied beyond. The mountains, more rolling hills, the little town of Gallow, only everything was cloaked in tones of gray. Almost like one of those really old movies that didn’t have any color.

Nothing existed on that side. Nothing alive anyway. No animals, no people, no Eldan tech wandering around causing trouble. No Dominion.

No sound.

Nothing.

It was odd. Despite not knowing much better, Roger knew that THAT was not normal. The sheer vastness of it was quite terrifying. How long did it go on? It looked like it went on well past the mountains. Into Thayd even. Maybe into Galeras, and maybe Whitevale after that.

Where did everybody go??

He nervously got to his feet, backing up and looking up at the great wall of gray that kept him from going any further.

Nothing happened.

So he turned his back and started walking.

Tremor Ridge was still all right. There were people fussing with their mining equipment, Protostar agents hanging around, harassing the locals… The usual.

Walker wasn’t anywhere to be found though. Nor the Captain. Nor Mara, or the old doctor McPhearson, or anybody else he’d come to know.

He was alone. But, for whatever reason, he seemed a lot less nervous about it than he thought he’d be. For now, anyway.

Maybe someone could point the way.

Roger wrung his hands anxiously and picked out a rather large Granok miner to ask. “Uhm...excuse me?” Always be polite, Walker said. Don’t forget to say excuse me, and please and thank you. It was hard to remember everything, but he continued. “Do you know what that big gray thing is?” The miner paused and looked up from his work. “Oh that??” So he could see it too. “Yeah, funny how that just showed up one day. Ain’t no rhyme or reason to it. I dunno, no one’s ever gone over to it. Seems like they can’t.” They can’t? “Nah. Ain’t had communication with anyone out there in weeks. It’s like the whooole world’s gone silent.” Roger found a nice crate to climb up onto and sit on. “Gone silent? How?” “Listen kid I don’t know. Things like that just happen.” “But why? Why do they happen?” “Ya got corn stuffed in yer ears??” The Granok laughed at his own joke.

“No...” Roger checked to make sure. “It’s just very strange. I’d like to go home, but I don’t know how to get there. Thayd’s on the...it’s on the other side.” “I wouldn’t worry about it, if I was you. Just...enjoy this side of it I guess.” None of it seemed any clearer than when it started, and that much was frustrating. He slid off the crate and went walking again, meandering around aimlessly before turning his attention down to the ground. To his boots. He wiggled his toes and dug them into the dirt. Golden petals fluttered across his vision and he looked up, startled.

A pleasant breeze blew over endless hills of gold bladed grass.

Golden exanite jutted out of the ground, out of the craggy rocks that surrounded this place like a valley, continuing on into the distance and turning into yellow geometric plateaus and towers, until they faded out into the distance.

Somewhere out there, he heard...something. A soft sound. A melody. A voice?? Someone was singing.

Beyond the horizon was a glimmering tree of gold on a very large hill. The wind billowing through its branches made the leaves shimmer almost like the sun on the ocean.

The voice was coming from there.

Through the grass, he ran.

When the large golden tree was finally in sight, he stopped to catch his breath. He looked over his shoulder, and the gray was there again, surrounding the rest of the valley. It was almost like the tree was staving it off, somehow.

Roger continued on, until he got to the very top. He could hear the voice very clearly now, but no one was there.

“...But I hear it…” He looked around, sniffing loudly. Round and round he went, checking all possible sides, but alas. Nothing at all.

So he sat down at the base of the tree and stared at the immense world of gray that threatened to swallow everything up.

He hated to admit it, but it really felt like he WAS really all alone. Like everyone picked up and went off back into space somewhere. Why did they leave him here?? That wasn’t very nice. Not even Walker was around.

Maybe he left too. He didn’t know.

He gazed out into the silent world beyond, waiting. And waiting, and waiting, and waiting.

And the voice kept on singing that melody. That lullaby.

“I hear you.” He wept, drawing his legs up so that he could wrap his arms around them and bury his face all at the same time. “Maybe they don’t, out there. But I do. Honest.”

He received no answer. Maybe the singing voice wasn’t listening to HIM. Maybe it was just there. Maybe it was the tree singing. Maybe it was a ghost somewhere. Or maybe it was something he’d forgotten.

It did nothing to make him feel any better.

And so, he continued to sit. Waiting.

For anything.

_________

“Roger- Roger snap out of it-” Walker shook Roger by the shoulders a few times but he could hardly get a response from him. All he did was stare out into nothing, saying nothing. Not even his eyes moved, and he blinked rarely at that. The captain made a facial expression of...either concern or disgust or some combination of the two. Even HE wasn’t really sure. “Did you give him new medications??” He signed as he slapped at Walker’s arm to get his attention.

“What??? No- no Mara said they were going to- she said there was some sort of new treatment- one that could help him get better- he WAS better- PHENOMENALLY better-” Roger could remember longer than he ever had. He wasn’t acting so childish. And he was more cheerful than moody, and a lot less sleepy.

“But...but then-” Then THIS.

He’d just stand there for periods at a time, some longer than the others. He wouldn’t move, he’d barely breathe. Occasionally he’d still wander around but it was like someone had shut off his brain and let his body run on autopilot. And it was starting to become more and more frequent.

Why did he say OK to this- it was an experimental treatment- WHY oh WHY did he let Mara talk him into this?? “Forget it- we’re going to the hospital. I don’t care- I WON’T have him like this. Abso-LUTELY not.” Walker shook his head, trying to push down all the panic welling up in his chest. He picked Roger up and went straight for the front door.

Yaedra raised a hand to stop him before groaning. He grabbed his coat off the chair and followed after the botanist. Of course, he remembered to lock the door before they had left.

[deeafrotailmisstress]

Amongst the many strange items that could be found in the wanderer’s large pockets was a small wallet. Inside a few pizza coupons, some candy wrappers, a stolen ID, a tooth...? And a small folded piece of old paper. Inside was what looked like an old photograph of a younger Jazz accompanied by four brothers, one who looked like a twin. Starting from left to right it was Jason, Joshua, Jamison and Jaxson. Their mother had a thing for alliteration.

So guess which sibling missed the memo on gaining the ‘looking cool/surly’ gene? Well to be fair Jazz actually grows into her more cheerful demeanor later on in her life, but that’s a completely different story. Also currently, that photo would have Jason ripped out because of the whole selling-Jazz-into-slavery-to-settle-a-debt thing. You can find it on Jaz’s bio. xD Until then, hope you guys like this pic and if you are curious, more extensive summaries of each brother is below the cut!

Jason Abernale - Born 1637 AE, he is 33 years old and the eldest. Being the first born, a lot of pressure was put onto him to either follow into his father’s or mother’s footsteps. Finding himself to be a good spellslinger, Jason ended up joining in the military academy of his fleet, but never found that he satisfied his parents’ approval since he was an average soldier and didn’t live up to the great legends that were told about his father. This caused bitterness and resent to grow in him, especially after he was raised with grand promises of being just as great as his father someday by almost everybody but his parents. It often caused him to lash out on his family, hence why he has a very tense relationship with them. Mostly with Joshua and the twins.

After a mysterious incident occurred that no one knew about, Jason abruptly fled the academy and his fleet to join a ragtag group of mercenaries. Well. They called themselves mercenaries, but they were really bandits that sometimes offered their services if the price was right. Jason developed in his travels quite a strong gambling addiction, often throwing away the riches of his travels with the bandits in any large Casinos he could find. Sometimes his efforts were fruitful, but most of the time it either resulted in empty pockets or large debts that he would eventually run away from. One day however Jason found himself playing cards against a notorious Darkspur Cartel merchant who was adamant on making sure that Jason paid the large debt he owed him after he lost the game. Knowing that the sick bastard was into slave trading, particularly in violent caged arenas, Jason used whatever money he could find and compensated by selling an Esper human, something he knew the merchant didn’t have in his collection. ...The worst part however was that the human he sold was in fact his little sister Jazz, who he never saw again after he tricked her into the trap. Jason hasn’t contacted his family ever since. Currently you can find Jason working solo now, helping transport commodities within the black market between both the Dominion and Exiles on Nexus and sometimes traveling through different space ports to catch bounties on the side.

Joshua Abernale -  Born 1640 AE, he is 30 years old and the second oldest. His mother used to joke about fate playing a hand on him being born around the same time as their family’s arrival on Arboria with the Exiles, because ever since he was young Josh found that he was talented in the sciences, mostly biology. While in school, teachers were impressed with his ability to solve biology and chemical equations that he was even bumped up a year. It caused some tension between him and his older brother Jason. The latter was envious of how Josh grew closer with their mother, who was also a scientist.  Josh however had another talent he was more passionate about; art. After a while, his tutors would complain about the boy’s growing lack of interest in his studies, often showing the parents his books covered in sketches and doodles. While Marcus was impressed with his son’s talent, Zayna was less so. But after chastising Josh didn’t seem to do much to dissuade his mind, he was finally able to convince his parents to ditch his science course to study illustration, then practicing tattoo artistry. He used to work in his own room whenever he had customers, but found himself curious about the opportunities found on Nexus and so decided to go down to the planet to have a look. A week’s stay turned into a month and a month turned into a couple until eventually Josh found that he quite liked providing tattoos for all sorts of curious races on Nexus, even gaining experience in carving tattoos on Granoks!  Now you can find Joshua with his own tattoo parlor in Thayd, open to all customers whether big or small. He does sometimes take up the latest science magazine issues if only to keep up with the latest studies his mother likes to rave to him about through their monthly email chats. Once a momma’s boy, always a momma’s boy.

Jamison Abernale - Born 1642 AE, Jamison is 28 years old and the third eldest in the J squad. Jamison grew up as probably the most laid-back and mellow out of the Abernale siblings. He was always an easygoing but introverted kid, often preferring to stay at home and watch what his mother at work rather than go play with the other kids on the ship fleets. Due to his lacking motivation to compete against his siblings, most didn’t expect much from the little boy. Until one day Zayna found that he was able to recite an entire page off of one of her “Species of Zircon II, amphibian edition: Vol. 3″. It turned out that Jamison was actually a lot more smarter than he let on and had a pretty good memory.

As he grew older, Jamison didn’t really know what he wanted to do with his life as he wasn’t particularly passionate about any of his hobbies. He mostly liked floating in an empty hull room with the artificial gravity turned off, a window wide open and watch all the stars that passed by as the ship drove around space. He either assisted his mother in her lab or read any of her volumes in her archives. Until one day, Jason showed up and asked Jamison if he was interested in a life more exciting and fun than any of the dull responsibilities they had planned for him on their Exile fleet. Blinded by the admiration Jamison always held for his oldest brother, the naive teenager agreed to go away with Jason and help him on some assignments and missions with his brother’s bandit group, not really aware of the often illegal nature of their activities. Jamison over the years started to grow more wary and apprehensive of what Jason kept pushing him to do until he found out what his brother did with Jazz and that was the final straw. After a violent argument, Jamison felt too ashamed to return back to his old fleet. Instead he followed after Joshua and took a ride to the planet Nexus.

You can find Jamison working as an assistant at Joshua’s tattoo parlor in Thayd or sometimes taking the odd task or two from scientists who need a hand to make ends meet. 

Jaxon Abernale - Born 1644 AE, Jaxon is 24 years old and the youngest baby brother by 2 minutes. Jaxon initially grew up tied to the hip with his older twin Jazz, both of them rumored to even having cryptophasia when they were toddlers. But soon after Jaxon found out he had stronger Espernetic abilities like his father, he was taken away more often to control his abilities. At first Jaxon didn’t really want to fight, but after discovering that he was pretty good at it and finding other children like him, he eventually started to like his weekly sessions. Jaxon grew up harnessing his abilities stronger and more efficiently, while Jazz didn’t seem to have the same knack for it as her brother. Jaxon grew up feeling guilty over how he didn’t do anything about the obvious favoritism their parents showed him since Jazz was often overshadowed by Jaxon. His training with his father however didn’t last long after Marcus died from defending their ship against Marauders.

Jaxon would still continue to train and help around as security in the ship once he was old enough. Zayna however, in her grief, convinced Jaxson to not join the military like their father did and not join the fight against the Dominion either, as she couldn’t bear to see another member of their family leave. Out of obligation and guilt, Jaxon remained on the ship with their mother for a while, even after all his siblings had left. Secretly however, he wanted to be a beast tamer. Jaxon was always passionate about creatures of all sizes ever since he used to read about them in picture books during his childhood. Often if any live breeds were brought onto the ship, he would try to convince the storage-keeper to let him borrow the odd critter or two to keep in his room and care for a while.  You can find Jaxon either on an Exile fleet ship trying to finish his veterinary studies, a space port gathering supplies, or on Nexus visiting family or admiring the wildlife.

[darcyfirth]

Hartwin fic recs (2/?)

[Long post]

These are lovingly saved in my laptop's Kindle and I love them dearly. It's umbrellas this time, glasses if I made part 3.

Authors' tagged tropes are included and I tried my best not to include spoilers. As usual my comments are in italics.  

☂️ Sparking - LapisLazuli. E, 2k. Traped in a closet trope. 

“Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while,” Harry whispers, calm as you please, as if Eggsy’s face isn’t pressed directly into the little hollow between his neck and his shoulder, as if Eggsy isn’t drowning in the fucking scent of his cologne, as if the fabric of his bespoke suit isn’t caressing Eggsy’s cheek like a goddamn lover.

☂️ Red Striped Ties - violentcheese. G, 1k. Red string of fate AU.

"Eggsy is the ragamuffin kid who refuses to stop hanging the Kingsman Tailor shop because he has a crush on Harry Hart, the owner."

Eggsy follows his string patiently. Harry ignores his.

☂️ You Get Up With Fleas - evil_brainmate. T, 74k. Corgi/prince!Eggsy. My first time prompting someone (with my old url) and the result is so much more than I expected.

Eggsy is a fairy prince, trapped in the human world and cursed to transform each day into a corgi. Harry Hart is a gentleman spy, and mortal, who picks him up thinking he's a stray. The two of them must work together to find a way to break the curse.

☂️ Paint With all the Colours of the Wind - Della19. G, 1k. Soulmates AU. 

Harry x Eggsy soulmate au where you only see colour once you meet your soulmate (so you don’t know them until you see them).

And it goes away when they die.

☂️ our vintage misery - fideliant. E, 23k. Pining, slow burn. 

hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out?

On a difficulty scale of one to saving the world, love shouldn't be this far off the charts.

☂️ into the wails of your windfight - fideliant. E, 8k. Pining. 

It takes a mission gone wrong for Eggsy to find out that even in real life, the dead don't always stay dead. Sometimes the movies get that part right, it would seem.

☂️ Class Of Conduct - fideliant. E, 13k. Slow burn. 

Or, Six Things Eggsy Has Learned About Being A Gentleman

“Lesson number one,” Harry says. “Manners matter.”

☂️ Random Access Memories - fideliant. E, 20k. Memory loss.

Having a supercomputer in your head isn't all that much to be cracked up about.

☂️ down dark tides the glory slides - fideliant. E, 23k. Pining, memory loss. 

You only ever truly hurt the ones you love.

☂️ Or Else - breakdancingfish. M, 4k.

Before they’re allowed to go out on their own, Eggsy and Roxy form a four person team with Harry and Merlin, completing several missions together. Oh, and Harry is the world’s biggest tease. Of course.

☂️ We Are Faking It - lokidiabolus. T, 62k. Fake relationship, slow burn.

For Eggsy it was a thing - he was taking from Harry enough, now was the time he should give something back. Even if it meant playing his lover to get the mission going and catch the culprit. Who would it be if not him, right? Right.

☂️ 57 Degrees. Precisely. - Galahard. M, 6k. Marine!Eggsy, texing, coffee shop AU.

In an alternate world Eggsy goes into the Marines, and stays in the Marines. This is a take on that au, though please forgive my lack of actual Marine knowledge. Also included: finicky coffee drinkers, texting addictions, and baristas with ulterior motives.

☂️ A Not So Lazy Evening - Galahard. E, 3k. Bottom!Harry, PWP. Really good read.

☂️ Vermillion - Galahard. E, 14k. Shy!Harry, slow burn.

He didn't know what to do with that. He didn't blush. He wasn't some teenager to be so affected by anything Eggsy did. Though really, he couldn't remember the last time he'd looked at someone and not pictured them in his bed but rather his dining room, chowing down on too sugary cereal while loudly revealing his plans for the day.

☂️ Soulmates - Galahard. 1k. Soulmates AU. How much do I adore this? A lot.

For Harry Hart's 16th birthday he not only gets his soul mark.

He gets a complete sentence.

☂️ Withdrawal - Saucery. T, 1k. Pining, finger kink.

Eggsy goes into withdrawal without Harry’s touch.

☂️ The Language of Flowers - Saucery. M, 1k. Flower shop AU, florist!Eggsy, lawyer!Harry, meet-cute, mutual pining.

Eggsy is a florist with an attitude. Harry is a lawyer with a conscience. Flowers bring them together.

☂️ The King’s Thief - twentyfourblackbirds. T, 8k.

"Harry," Eggsy said one day, while Harry was deep in a report about weapons smuggling in Ukraine. "I really fancy you." "Mmm-hmm," Harry responded, flipping to another chapter about airline safety standards in Indonesia. "If I had to say it," Eggsy mused, slightly put out, "I would, in fact, say that I am deeply, wildly, and madly in love with you." "That's very good, Eggsy," Harry said absentmindedly, scrawling his signature at the bottom of the paper. Eggsy sighed. "Sometimes, I might think you don't listen to a word I say."

☂️ Patience and Sheer Determinaiton - blacktofade. E, 47k. Fake relationship, prostitute!Eggsy.

Harry goes undercover to infiltrate the circle of a corrupt overlord and is given Eggsy, a young prostitute, as a token of goodwill. Harry has to live with Eggsy and keep him safe, while maintaining his cover.

☂️ Care and Custody - esama. T, 50k.

Eggsy takes out the medal in slightly worse circumstances, asking for a miracle.

☂️ How Eggsy Met Harry, As Told Through A Series of Soul Marks - thayde. 91k. Soulmates AU, WIP. I would warn you that this hasn't been updated for a long time now but if you have a brave heart then march on soldier.

Eggsy stares at the Mark on his chest sometimes, and wonders if his soulmate would ever settle for street trash like him.

☂️ Boyfriend Material - Deepdarkwaters. E, 3k. Mutual pining, oblivious!Eggsy.

"Are you a cigarette? Cos you're smoking hot and I wanna put your butt in my mouth."

☂️ Pig Latin - aerospaces. E, 10k. Fluff.

In Kenya, Eggsy falls off a flight of stairs. Or: lessons in cohabitation.

Eggsy discovers the joys of a home-cooked meal among many other things.

☂️ Considerably Less Cannibalism - LizaPod. E, 6k. Shaving, barebacking. This  one is the myth, the legend, the fic.

It is a real, physical struggle to not stare like a dogger while Harry shrugs off his jacket and undoes his collar, sets his signet ring aside. He has detailed, minutely detailed, fantasies about unbuttoning that fucking collar. At least he’s not wearing the holster right now, or Eggsy’d be sprung already. “It’s time you learned the fine art of the straight razor shave.”

Eggsy gives him his best you havin’ a fucking giggle, mate eyebrows. “Like Sweeney Todd?”

Harry’s sigh is just bordering on melodramatic, but he’s also got that odd— Roxy calls it enigmatic—smile he gets when Eggsy trots out some unexpected bit of culture. "Yes, Eggsy, like Sweeney Todd."

☂️ Kiss Me Now (before I can run) - persephoneggsy. M, 37k. Soulmates AU.

It wasn’t unusual, Eggsy told himself. There were plenty of people- just a little under half of the world’s population, really- that weren’t with their soulmates. Some of them just hadn’t met yet; others had died beforehand; and then there were the people in Eggsy’s situation. Sometimes people genuinely didn’t want their soulmates. Either they were in love with someone else, or they just didn’t like what they got stuck with, and Eggsy imagined the latter was very much the case with him and Harry. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what it must have felt like for him, the world’s prime example of a posh bloke, to have his soulmate be some beaten-up kid. He would have rejected him too.

Or: soulmate AU where you know your soulmate from the moment you touch them, and when you do, their name gets written over your heart like a brand. But that's not always a guarantee.

☂️ “It suits you, you should keep it” - eggsystolemyhart. G, 600-ish.

"What...?"

"Pardon, Eggsy."

"What...?"

"Did you not hear me previously? I said it suits you, you should keep it."

"What...?"

☂️ Five Stars, Would Shag Again - EmmyAngua. E, 6k. Seduction.

This time, the penultimate task isn’t to seduce an heiress, it’s to seduce an agent. Merlin assures the final three that the agent is chosen entirely at random.

So of *course* it’s Harry.

☂️ are we human, or are we dynamite - randomhorse. M, 13k. Pacific Rim AU. 

It’s been seventeen years since Harry has lost his co-pilot Lee Unwin in the drift, and still the world won’t stop ending.

In the Hong Kong Shatterdome, Merlin is launching a new line of Kingsman Jaegers fit to fight Category 4 Kaijus emerging from the Breach.

In the suburbs of London, Eggsy Unwin gets the draft for Jaeger Academy.

☂️ who got the keys to my bimmer - hartwinning. M, 69k. Mutual pining, mechanic!Eggsy, UST, slow burn.

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?"

Harry gives him a slightly bewildered look and furrows his brow.

"A porcupine has the pricks on the outside," Eggsy finishes.

☂️ hold courage to your chest - Fahye. E, 46k. I adore this.

Eggsy slumps against the wall, feeling every bruise like it's new, and tells the truth.

"You want to make sure I jump when I'm told?" he demands. "It'd better be you doing the telling, Harry."

☂️ Bang to Rights - concernedlily. E, 17k. Police AU.

Constable Unwin never met a tailor before, but he knows this bloke who keeps turning up at his crime scenes ain't one.

☂️ Breakeven - theshizniiit (orphan_account). E, 85k. Omega!Harry, mpreg.

When Harry walked inside the church (and then out of it, and right into Valentine's bullet) he didn't know he was pregnant.

And now he's back from the dead. This time, with an extra passenger and quite a few problems.

☂️ The New Age - DivineProjectZero. Soulmates AU.

It starts with being cursed.

No, scratch that. It starts with a garden and a serpent. And no, it goes a little differently from what you’d think.

☂️ You Are Beautiful - Sheepie. G, 8k. Coffee shop AU.

Eggsy Unwin works as a barista at the Suited Bean. He's been in love with regular customer Harry Hart for a long time, but he never said anything. Who would want to date someone his size? But Harry sees nothing wrong with the way Eggsy looks.

☂️ Couple of (Couples) Mugs - ilokheimsins. T, 2k. Fluff. 

Harry and Eggsy absolutely do not have couples mugs that proclaim their love for one another. Harry is about 70 percent sure of this.

☂️ Gimme All Your Love - midnightsurge. M, 11k. Fireman!Eggsy, rimming.

“Sorry,” a soothing, male voice started hesitantly, “but… didn’ I pull you out of a burnin’ building a few weeks ago?”

Harry nearly choked on his drink as the question registered in his mind, his brown eyes flicking to the side to confirm that, yes indeed, it was Eggsy standing there with wide eyes.

“Fuck, sorry!” Eggsy apologised profusely as he held his hands up, wanting to help but unsure how to do so. “Ain’t meant to startle you!”

Or

Eggsy is a fireman. He saves Harry's life when a mission goes awry. A few weeks later, they meet again.

☂️ Rules of Insanity - inthepapers3times. E, 54k. Dark!Eggsy. 

The worst mistake of Harry Hart’s life started like many of the minor mistakes he had made: with a one night stand. If only he had taken the taxi all the way to his house. Maybe then he wouldn't have met this particular young man, and he wouldn't have taken him home. Maybe then all of this could have been avoided.

Harry gets pulled into a dangerous game with Gary, a disturbed man he barely knows, and has no choice but to play along.

Gary is in control completely. He makes the rules. Harry is just forced to follow them.

☂️ dig in your fingers - kirkaut. E, 42k. First time, body worship.

The lack of a silver suppository has set Eggsy upon a certain path. The way that Eggsy looks, dripping wet and half naked, sets Harry on another.

(Or: Total Canon Re-Write, aka The One Where Harry's Libido Saves His Life)

☂️ sins without tragedies - kingstier. T, 11k. 5 + 1. Fake marriage.

"Harry, are we married?"

"Aren't we?"

Or, the five times they're practically married and the one time they're not (yet).

☂️ 5 Knots Harry made + 1 Knot Eggsy tied - therune. T, 2k. 5 + 1. I love this immensely!

Whenever Eggsy gets dressed in his suit he purposefully skips a button or struggles with his tie so that Harry is forced to step into his personal space and fix it for him.

☂️ Like Real People Do - coloursflyaway. T, 3k. 5 + 1. Undercover, first kiss.

Five times Eggsy called Harry a pet name, and one time Harry called Eggsy one.

[rogerbriden]

Takeout

“Walker-Walker-Walker- Can I go outside?”

The botanist squinted. “What? What on Nexus FOR? There’s nothing out there.” He glanced out the window as Roger ducked under his arm to press his face on the window. “Why do you need to go outside?”

“I dunno.”

“…Well if you don’t even know why then-”

The front door flew open with a loud SLAM as the doorknob hit the hole in the plaster of the wall. Walker jumped out his boot practically taking Roger with him.

Yaedra snorted as he eyed them both, moving inside with two plastic bags in his hands and closing the door with his foot.

“Don’t do that! Couldn’t you just ring the doorbell?!” Walker’s ears pinned back. Roger poked his head out from behind the taller Mordesh’s arms.

“Is that food? I smell something,”

The Captain placed everything down onto the counter, getting the bags open and pulling out styrofoam containers. Whatever was in them smelled sweet and savory.

“What is it? What is that? Can I have some? Smells sweet- Walker can I have some-” Roger practically circled the counter like a hungry shark until Walker was about to grab a hold of him and sit him down.

“Yes yes just be patient-” The botanist popped open one of the boxes to reveal a stir fry. With a LOT of veggies in particular. “This doesn’t have any sugar in it does it??”

Cap gave him his usual half-lidded gaze. “No. I specifically asked for his to be made without sugar.” No sugar, AND extra vegetables for the boy.

Walker breathed a sigh of relief. “Good… but uh- ROGER-”

Roger paused before taking a big plastic fork-full.

“What do you say?”

“OH uh- thank you!”

“Ok, go ahead.”

As he dug in, Cap slid over a container of a much more mild, but still aromatic soup towards the botanist. With any luck it wouldn’t upset his stomach.

“Thank you…where did you get this?”

Yaedra paused, then reached into the bag for his own food; a beef bowl. He gave no answer.

Walker’s ears pinned back again, until he sighed heavily and focused on his own food. As their time together went on, he learned to stop asking so many questions, if only because the answers from the Captain half the time were not at all satisfactory.

Still… the gesture of even something so small as bringing home dinner meant a lot to him. It was one less thing to do, and they could all spend time together at the dinner table- er… counter.

“…So,” Rather than stuff his face full of broth however, he focused on talking about the day. “Roger did a good job helping me with the garden today.”

The human looked over at Walker questioningly. “I did? When??”

“This afternoon. You pulled all the weeds just like I asked you to and then you watered the tomatoes. And after that you fed Bell all on your own without needing my help.”

Roger beamed at hearing about all these things he’d managed to accomplish in just ONE day, but obviously had no knowledge of. “I did a good job?”

“Yes, an excellent job.”

He wriggled in his seat and went back to eating his dinner.

Yaedra almost smirked, though he kept shoveling rice into his mouth with a pair of plastic chopsticks. Once he decided to take a moment to breathe and get a drink, his hands came up briefly. “What about you?”

Walker always did find it surprising whenever anybody bothered to ask about his day, but he was glad to share anyway. “Oh you know… aside from the gardening, the usual. I ran the reports, did the laundry, mopped the floors, dusted the shelves-” Essentially his whole list of chores that he performed daily.

Not very exciting, the Captain thought to himself.

“And you? Where were you today?”

The botanist was used to Yaedra being gone during the afternoons. He’d wake up, get dressed and have breakfast with them, and then he’d head off to gods knew where. Sometimes he’d come back at dinnertime, with dinner occasionally, while other times he’d come back in the late hours of the night, have snack or a smoke and go to bed. He was like clockwork, in that he’d be off doing his own thing (too bad it wasn’t a day job.) And while Walker never knew WHAT he was doing out there, as it was different every time, he never really felt uncomfortable about it. There wasn’t any reason to be. In the running off and cheating sense anyway.

Yaedra came back with his drink and sat down. “I went walking near Celestion again today.”

Immediately Walker frowned. “You know you’re not supposed to go there…”

“I stayed far away from the Reaper camps.”

For a moment, Walker wasn’t sure he believed him. But, then he remembered the nanobodies in his blood. They would shock Yaedra if he went anywhere near their set perimeters. Thayd’s judges made sure of it. And so far, they hadn’t been set off. Though, Walker felt it was only a matter of time really.

“…Well good… Don’t go there anymore. There’s nothing out in that direction anyway,” Only a bunch of Aurin and their farms and towns and Lopp and their caravans and rivers and trees and Eldan technology and animals and plants and-

Roger finished his food before jumping out of his chair, rearing to go.

“Wait- throw that away- wash your hands, then you can go!”

He whined but did as Walker said, dashing on up the stairs.

The two Mordesh listened to the loud steps on the second floor until they died down. Walker sighed again, and Yaedra only continued eating.

“Thank you for bringing dinner again… I’m exhausted…”

Yaedra glanced up at the botanist before nodding. “You should sleep early today.” He signed.

“Oh no, Roger will be up for just a few more hours… once he’s asleep then I’ll start to settle down. Besides, I’ve a few more reports I need to look over before I turn them in tomorrow morning to the-”

Cap narrowed his eyes, staring him down. Walker stopped talking and stared back at him wide-eyed.

He knew that look he was giving him.

“…O…r maybe I…could do it…in the morning…?”

Cap’s expression didn’t change. Walker swallowed the lump forming in his throat.

“You tire yourself out too much. You need to sleep.”

“…I…I know…” A thing easier said than done. Even if Walker climbed into bed, he’d be up for hours listening to every sound in the house, waiting for something to go completely wrong, even WITH somebody next to him.

“Do you?” Still, Cap’s challenging words (or signs) made him nervous and on edge from time to time. He knew the man meant well but goodness… not a single gentle bone in his body (or at least they weren’t easily found.)

Walker furrowed his brows. “Yes, I do,”

Yaedra shook his head lightly and finished his food off before tossing the container in the garbage.

Walker continued to pick at his soup before sealing it and putting it into the refrigerator. He suddenly felt very, very sleepy. As he rubbed at his eyes, Cap walked past him, reaching into his pockets for his cigarettes.

“Outside remember,”

He waved at him.

“Ok…just keep the door closed… You… won’t be long will you?”

Cap turned his head, then held up five fingers.

“…Maybe I’ll go and lay down… can you listen for Roger and keep an eye on him for a few minutes when you come back in?”

“Yes.”

“Ok… sorry, go ahead I’ll, go.”

Yaedra snorted again out his nose before stepping outside onto the porch.

Walker stood there for about a minute for no reason at all. Maybe he was waiting for something, or maybe he forgot what he was going to do. Oh, yes… lie down.

Stifling a yawn he took himself upstairs, making sure to poke his head into Roger’s room first.

“Everything all right in here?”

Roger took his attention off his coloring. Jacquemont was with him. “Yes!”

“Ok… When you get tired we’ll-”

“I’m not tired.”

“Oh? Well don’t worry, you will be soon.”

Roger rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing. The scanbot gave Walker a reassuring beep as his antenna blinked a couple times.

Walker pursed his lips and lingered a little longer, then headed down the hallway towards his own room. As he stepped inside, he scanned the place quickly. Funny how it still looked like ONLY his room even though two people were sharing it. The only things that said otherwise were a couple socks on the floor, the violin case in the corner, and a couple other books about engineering, sign language and cooking on his desk.

Downstairs he heard the door open again. Cap must have finished. He just hoped he bothered to LOCK the door.

As soon as he drug his feet over towards his bed, he practically groaned and sunk down onto the mattress face first, completely exhausted.