#thats an evil joke to play on someone who is doing this bad i feel like that one person who called the suicide hotline

[bbqhooligan]

oh my god im full on crying in my deadly silent dorm im really not meant to survive this. "what did he have to look forward to? what was there to like? there was nothing good about his life" <- about him not making it. echoes like a gunshot in my ribcage

[the-moon-files]

Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain! :)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 (ur here!)

Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (you/they/them), Guide Reader!

Orbit: Headcanons-ish, Scenarios?

Stars: Wind, Wild, Sage, C*urage, K*ridai

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: i included the link from K*oridai (faces of evil), and the brunette Link from that old cartoon tv show,

& Trigger Warnings: none known.

☆

Wind (Wind Waker):

Misses being a big brother

LMAOOO I CAME FOR UR THROAT HAHAAA

ok chill chill he's doing okay

He's just not used to being the youngest in any given group, he used to be the oldest kid in charge of the younger ones and his little sister too

But dont get him wrong! He rlly does love the advantages that come with it,

and when he's feeling down abt not being older u usually cheer him up by reminding him he can be the biggest little shit he wants and every single Link will forgive him once he pulls out his baby seal eyes lmao

Ur the easiest to rope into horse playing/goofing off and he's very happy abt that

The others can be too serious for too long so he appreciates how u and him lighten them up by trying to give each other noogies (he loses most of the time)

As soon as Wind found out the others could play instruments, he immediately demanded they do campfire songs every night lol

(Most of the time one person caves, even just to idly play smth)

Likes inventing weird new games to play that'll convince as many other people to particpate, he used to do it back home too, like finding the prettiest rock on the island, that way his grandma and even adults could play too :)

Needs to sleep beside someone at night, bc he secretly likes it, back on his adventure going to sleep all by himself (unlike living with his grandma/sister) always was a little hard for him

Very hard to wake up in the morning, sleeps in the latest out of all the Links

("I'm a growing boy? Ofc i need my sleep, whats ur excuse??" @ the other Links who sleep in late lol)

Likes to sew! He's still learning, but his grandma used to teach him how so he could help her keep up with his growth spurts/recklessness tearing his clothes up

Idolizes u forever if you embroider, and will watch u like those videos of someone's cat who's fascinated by watching owner craft smth lol (like this ⚫️v⚫️)

Enjoys making stoic people crack their persona and laugh

Also has the wheeziest laugh youve ever heard, it makes u laugh every time, even when he started laughing over a dumb pun

Oh yeah, makes a foul amount of dad jokes for someone whos only like 14 💀

(He once managed to break Time and Legend, which then broke Wars and Twi, and it just continued down the Chain until everyone was crying or on the ground, he wears that shit like a badge and it literally made his confidence go 📈 puffed his chest out and everything lol)

Wild (Breath of the Wild):

U already know everything there is to know abt him??

I dont even have to say it, and it shows when ur around him lol

Like he'll go to do smth stupid like shield surf down death mountain in a unknown Hyrule, and before anyone can even realize thats what he's planning to do you've caught and stopped him and made a compromise to shield surf down some snow bluffs later instead

Or when u know he's gotten new ingredients in some other Link's Hyrule and is going to try and cook with them tonight, so u help him make a regular meal of smth else along with so the boys dont suffer stomaches

Like u can absolutely predict his bullshit all the time, just imagine the most adrenaline junkie thing he could do in that moment with the combination of things around him and you always know what tf he's up to, ur always right lol

Ur the only one who can get him to stop the chaos (besides maybe Time, weirdly enough Sky/Hyrule/Four bc they are the least likely to tell him to stop, so when they do, its usually a very, very bad idea)

Likes hair ornaments, he's got long hair for a reason after all

Likes u to style his hair, and esp if u teach him how to braid or do diff styles <333

He loves that u help cook/at least prep, and u make sure another Link helps too, bc thats a lot of ppl to make food for with little to no help 💀

(Makes u ur fav foods at even the slightest mention of them, like u wont even have to say ur craving Link's already whipped the pan out best housewife fr)

One of the few Links who's adventurous with his clothing, and trying new stuff

Wild was worried abt his Champion tunic getting messed up but was sad he couldn't wear it as much anymore

So u handmade him a new shirt that imitates the old one but with some new designs to represent the Chain! :)

He started crying.

He either hugs so lightly he seems like he's not enjoying it (no true, he's just trying to be polite)

Or he squeezes so hard be pops ur back and nearly breaks a rib

U got the latter for that shirt lol

Any new thing he doesnt remember how to deal with, like how to sew (he knows 1 stitch help), how to wash clothes (dont mix whites and blacks, and colors), how to soothe headaches/muscle aches etc.

He just wanders pitifully over to ur side and looks pitiful lol

Like he's a confused and saddened puppy

And just holds up whatever mess he's made like, "im so sorry, i dont know how to do this pls"

Bc he trusts u to know (the other Links may be hit or miss too tbh lmao)

And ur the least likely to clown him for it too, at least nothing he doesnt also find funny

Sage (Tears of the Kingdom):

So sue me, i enjoy this stupid-definitely-not-canon-unhinged-Link thats done with everyones bullshit and wants to be a hermit

SUEEE MEE ABT ITTTTT✨️

The first time u saw his hair nest and immediately clapped ur hand over u mouth in shock and tried to take a brush to it on sight

He fucking hissed at you.

Feral bitch.

Sage isnt like that all the time, but he was certainly the most distrustful and prickly out of all the Links

(U could smell it was like a defense mechanism from his adventure/past from a mile away, and knew with time that it'd fade away into his true self... like how u just knew Wild that well too)

U are the only person allowed to casually touch him, he shys away from the other Links, let alone strangers,and the first he allowed to help him with his hair

Tbh after u washed it out and got tangles and mats out and cut split ends off etc.

He almost teared up, and was extremely confused why

Def the type to not have realized he felt insecure lowkey abt it until it was fixed (he also was embarrassed to say he didnt rlly know how to take care of it)

Energy of a stray feral cat that leaves dead birds on ur doorstep without fail every morning and u leave a food bowl out in hopes he'll actually be your cat 💀

Extremely protective of you, and eventually the Chain, to the point where he might set someone's hair on fire or use runes on them

Like not enough to seriously injure but enough to scare tf out of ppl and have them running for their lives

(Did he literally growl at someone when they tried to flirt with you?? ... why is Twi encouraging him.)

Was unnerved by Wild at first but slowly got used to him and often butts into whatever private convo u two are having

Like just casually struts up and plops his head on ur shoulder and waits for attention, may complain loudly depending on how grumpy he is that day

(Wild's not getting jealous and constantly hogging u for cooking to get even more time with you what-)

Okay but unfortunately

Once those 2 got comfy with each other, they started tag teaming everyone

Like u can now bet that if an explosion happens in the distance, Sage definitely caused it, and if he's there, then Wild's there making him the explosives

(Same for if Wild's there, then Sage's there)

Def the Link that likes showing the most skin, he "gets overheated easily" - local half naked man justifies his nakedness

(coughtotallynototherreasonslikebeingshirtlessaroundyouallthetimecough)

Absolutely grievous clowning on the other Links, like its getting into bullyinggg 😭

His words are E rated for Everyone, no ones safe not even you

Sage: "wait, all those rings and nobody's ever put one on you? And you've never put on one someone else??🤔🤔"

Legend: ...😦

The rest of the Chain: 💀😭😶

Time, trying to hide he's choking on laughter so hard he's abt to fall into the firepit

Will occasionally team up with Wild to make a protective little border on either side of you while in towns/new Hyrules

U once offered to sing/hum for him after a nightmare while it was ur turn on watch (he sleeps up trees btw) and after u switched off w/other Link, u both went to edge of camp to sleep next to each other and he had the best sleep of his life like that

Now demands begs u to sing him to sleep every night, wont take "i dont sound that good tho" for an answer

Courage (The Legend of Zelda, 1989 Cartoon TV show):

Yeah... he's here too.

Just dont read this tbh

Enjoys being ✨️special✨️ by being the only hero twink out here with brunette hair

Was insecure abt it being curly/wavy until u slowly built his confidence

Bc he's got the most confidence in his strength, but not in much else tbh 😭

Actually will randomly have moments of responsibility or capability you didnt expect out of him bc he can be so silly and jokey all the time

Youll be lost as hell and he just "hey its ok the stars look like this so we go this way" and it works

Like the type of person u sort of avoid relying on bc he's like a playful jock type and then they randomly show theyre the captain of the team for a reason

Dont ask why, but hes good at knitting, shhhh no, no, no explanation he just secretly is he wont even tell u why or how or when he learned this he just "hehe, wouldnt u like to know princeyyy/princesssss/your majestyyyy"

Hyrule, and rest of Chain standing by, went to talk to one of the Great Fairies in a Hyrule once to try and get some info abt where to camp tonight or where nearest town was and before he could get close enough to ask,

Courage was already yelling like "YOOOO BIGGEST FAIRY WHATS UP?! u mind giving some poor lost fellas like us somewhere to go with ourselves tonight??"

They kept talking super casually and she laughed so hard that she let u guys stay near her that night to camp and be under fairy protection like no fairy boy Link needed 💀

Everyone was shocked, and thats how u all found out Courage is rlly good with fairies/their best friend no matter the Hyrule

Every time u guys learn smth new abt him it feels so unexpected, like out of left field or smth

It just never seems to fit his usual persona, or at least not what youd expect from him

So needless to say the first time u guys learned he could talk to magical objects that were powerful enough (like the fucking triforce)-

(this was apparently so normal he literally lived with a piece of it just in his room all the time????)

Has weird mixture of country boy vs. royal prince sensibilities?

It alarmed several Links. 💀

He can talk to Fi.

(Sky and you nearly cried)

Like he lived in the castle alongside Zelda so he inherited some spoiled/etiquette stuff, but he still would absolutely go splash in mud puddles in the rain

Would literally do fucking anything if it meant youd give him a kiss on the cheek

Likes to hug you a lot too, with his huge ass arms lifting u up (no he does not care how much u weigh ur going UP) and spinning u around

Its his favorite, almost as much as kisses

No but he's slay fucking Majora to get a kiss, like it's actually unbelievable and kinda endearing how excited he gets if u promise him one lmao

Koridai (Link: The Faces of Evil):

Omg not them putting Link's name in the title of the gameee i didnt know that 😭😭

Geezzz,, i dont know what im on

But ig heres that other silly ass Link if anyone feels like reading it

Will also fight any god, including Hylia, for a kiss

Actually astoundingly good at strategizing

Like after a few times in heat of battle him organizing Links, Time and Wars practically jumped him to include him in planning shit

He was similar to Courage to in that he just was cracking jokes all the time u didnt expect it, also he's significantly more sarcastic than Courage

U introduced him to dark humor and the laugh he laughed practically burst out of him, he looked shocked by his own laugh lmao

So he also now has a streak of dark humor he shows when u talk for while/sees someone also enjoys it

Its like his not-so-guilty-pleasure

Really good at baking? He apparently learned a lot of miscellaneous skills to better court someone and he now uses them fully to seduce you,

thru gift giving mostly, its is love language besides acts of service :)

(All Links do some amount of acts of service tho <3)

Rlly good at styling hair surprisingly, and at shield surfing??? What

Actually down to try Wild's experimental dishes...

And by that i mean he pranks the rest of you by sneaking the inedible bits into ur food

U may or may not have nearly choked him out for it and now he doesnt do it to you, and even was trying to act all pitiful abt it like "sorry lovely, but i just wanted to tease u bc ur so cute!! 🥺👉👈"

Like,, stfu u little shit 💀

He has the energy of a male orange cat, dont ask why he just is, and specifically the orange cat getting on top of the fridge or stuck between the the screen door and glasss door comically or smth 😭

Hes also loud as hell

One of the worst at stealth unless he just keeps his mouth shut completely, like his whispering is loud

He proclaims his affections very loudly too, like gettin u flowers and chatting ur ear off with what he likes abt u lol

No, like he can go for 20 minutes or more if u let him, u better stop him before he gets into the personality based compliments

Bc those sound wayyy too personal to be aired out in public ngl, like its so soft and domestic itll kill u lol

And he means every word too 👀

☆

I HATE THIS NEW FEATURE OR FUNCTION I SWEAR THIS DIDNT HAPPEN BEFOREEE!!!

😭😭 U ABSOLUTELY KNOW WHAT IT IS BY NOW, IT FUCKING POSTED MY DRAFT BEFORE IT WAS READY TO GO

God fuck this hellsite stop doing this meee

Thats it im just do what i do for the other blog and write it smwhere else and then copy paste onto the post this is ridiculoussss 😒😒

Well anyway, i hope if u read this before i updated and actually FINISHED THIS u come back and read it again!! :(

Sorry guys, but blame tumblr pls before u blame me 😔

(Yeah theres a lot of emojis leave me alone i feel strongly abt this)

Peace out,

🐤 Peep

I think ill start signing off my name ig, unless u guys wanna call me Moon that works too

[year2000electronics]

I was thinking about this for a little bit but what would happen if Reverse Mabel (especially post-weirdmageddon) meets Anti-Mabel.

Seeing some call Reverse Mabel "evil" I feel this would be a very intresting interaction, Reverse Mabel may see her as someone she could of easily become.

ahh, the "anti" dimension. i ruminated on the concept a LOT back when lost legends first released! i think theres an amateurish fic i wrote somewhere in my files of anti-mabel getting basically-adopted by a one of us au ford BUT I CANT FIND IT.

excuse the opportunity im taking to rant about the idea of anti mabel as a whole lol, but... [continued under cut!]

her dimension is a little confusing to think about sometimes, because the story she comes from, don't dimension it, i think a lot of us can widely agree was almost too much of a "pivot" in a direction we didnt really need to go? it's focusing on addressing mabel's "selfishness", especially in the wake of that flood of mabel hate that started picking up steam, but i feel like the version of mabel that exists in don't dimension it is just... not very true or accurate to the actual character. it feels like a very extended "sorry we had mabel make a rash decision in the heat of the moment that the characters forgave her for because they understand and love her. we will now proceed to have a dimension of all mabels where theyre portrayed as so self-absorbed that theyre all stuck on that dimension with no hope of returning home." excuse my dramatic wording but i swear to god that's what it feels like! and that's what it READS like!

mabel got "caught up in her own mabelness"? she gets distracted with crafts and cats like a SQUIRREL?? the idea of her neglecting those around her being put directly next to her going "i caused an entire apocalypse just to get one more day of summer?" SHE WAS GOING TO LOSE TOUCH WITH HER BROTHER. SHE WAS GETTING LIED TO AND TRICKED BY A GUY WHO HAS LITERALLY BEEN TRYING TO START THE APOCALYPSE FOR BILLIONS OF YEARS NOW. its really ridiculous and it doesnt play well at ALL. this kind of thing really shows to me how trying to please bad-faith critics will literally only make the end product worse.

"but what does that have to do with anti mabel though?" well, anti-mabel's "evil" kinda gets affected by the moral of this story, don't you think? if they arent getting mabel right, then what is this ultimate "anti-mabel" really going to be? not really a reflection of any mabel i know. that's for sure.

but that aside, looking at everything that we know about anti-mabel, her dimension is kinda... played off as a joke? she feels a lot more like a joke character to me more than anything at this point lol

not that i really needed that much development from a one-off antagonist from a silly gravity falls comic but like. how is anti-mabel literally SUPERVILLAIN-TIER EVIL? what? where is she getting the resources for this?? and then you have the rest of her family who are all just like, chill? and its like WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON ANYMORE.

anyways. back to trying to answer the question i was literally asked. i think post-weirdmageddon mabel would see anti-mabel in a different light, thats for sure. anti-mabel's family is nothing like her! maybe she's just lonely. rev mabel knows you can't just get away with doing evil stuff, at least she's learning that, but i think some part of her would sympathize with her deep down

[renegadeer]

ill explain specifically why bots conversation with cabby + the way its portrayed is harmful. evil twitter thread to tumblr blog conversion time first off, AE potrays bot messing with cabby by lying to her for laughs. i understand iii is a childrens media and it would be fine under most context, but since cabby has memory disabilities and connects her self worth to the accuracy of her files, playing it as a joke feels cruel. bot isnt doing it to be cruel! bot doesnt know about cabby’s memory disability, but the tone of the show plays it off as though but isnt doing anything wrong when they are. plus, cabby’s intent when asking bot info about themselves is to precent herself from saying more things that could upset them in the future (her insensitive comment abt bot being a replica). she isnt writing the files or asking for info out of malice, she’s trying to use her memory aids to prevent herself from hurting other’s feelings in the future.

bot lying to her just feels cruel and unnecessary, since cabby isn’t trying to use the information in a way that would hurt them. bot’s reasoning for distrusting cabby’s is pointless. cabby needs accurate info and facts because otherwise she physically cant remember anything. cabby doesnt share files willy nilly either, she has only ever shared contestant files with test tube for the sake of the competition, but that would be the same thing as someone who didn’t have a memory disability sharing what they can remember abt a contestant verbally

but bot doesn’t let cabby use her memory aid, which cabby agrees to. it would have made more sense if bot just told cabby to keep the file private, which im sure cabby would have! the reason she elimed fan was bc he took a file without asking first, invading her privacy!

and this is the most dangerous message to send to someone with a memory disability. becuase oftentimes manipulators will prevent them from recording things that are said to them to more easily gaslight them later. im not saying bot is trying to do this, they arent, but its still a bad message to tell people with memory issues to not keep personal record of “private conversations”. keeping these records is how mentally disabled and physically disabled people keep themselves safe! not everyone in the world is a good, genuine person!

i don’t understand why the message AE seems to be sending is that cabby’s disability aid is a bad thing! its not a bad thing to keep records! its a good thing, actually, for disabled people to protect themselves! and cabby isn’t in danger in ii, but its still an unsafe message to send to say she shouldn’t keep records to keep her facts straight. ae tries to justify this by implying that the people around cabby are there to support her; but she shouldnt be told to stop protecting herself because she should trust she’s safe

This scene is framed as a heartwarming moment when its the most unsafe thing someone could say to a disabled person. If someone prevents you from using an aid and tells to rely on them instead, thats a RED FLAG. this is a common way for abusers to increase your dependance on them

IM NOT SAYING BOT IS AN ABUSER. BUT FRAMING THIS POSITIVELY IS UNSAFE. say im reading too much into a childrens media but for SOME CHILDREN THIS MIGHT BE THEIR FIRST EXPOSURE TO ANOTHER CHARACTER W MEMORY ISSUES!

at the end of the episode cabby leaves her file behind. HER DISABILITY AID BEHIND. why Is That the Moral You Want. Disability aids are so disabled people can be more independant. why are you using your disabled character have the “be more open and vulnerable” arc?? disabled people are already one of the most vulnerable minorities! do not push this idea to stop them from protecting themselves!

okay sorry guys end of my evil ramble. um. smile emoji. for the tumblrinas

[changbinsboobs]

ok so this might be a sensitive topic but who in skz would likely pull a taeil or something else thats just as bad and have everyone be shook up because we wouldnt expect it? cause ive thought about it for awhile and given that we dont know them even through readings i do wonder how skz seem to avoid being in such huge scandals or even crimes because i think if a big group was going to do such a thing i dont think itd be bts theyve grown up quite a bit and if anything does ever come about its hardly surprising imho. so then i was thinking skz would be the sort of group whod really surprise me if anything of the sorts came about them.

how about you? i really dont view any idol as being incapable of doing such a thing. i mean theyre always surrounded by staffs and coddled or catered for / babysat to no end but theyd still be able to do whatever it is without anyone knowing cause nct case really shocked me tbh but when i thought about it i was like yeah that makes sense because members can be sly and stingy off camera and we wouldnt ever know nor suspect them. so who would be your pick out of the group? honestly, han, maybe hyunjin if someone really pushed his buttons and or he just snapped from what hes had to deal with hmm maybe chan? i dont really get his act sometimes i just feel that he is puttiing it on cause stay really do baby them and play into chan is five years old type joke

Ok so yeah this indeed is a sensitive topic and im not sure if ur asking for a reading or just for my opinion but from what I've gathered until now i don't really get the vibe from anyone pulling a taeil. I do feel a potential for crime or scandals in all of them tho, idk if its just my prejudice cuz they're men and i expect anything from men especially korean ones👀 but i tbh i believe anyone has the potential to be evil or violent. We're humans at the end of the day. But is it as bad/strong for it to be with taeils case? Idk.

Also i think sexual crimes wouldn't really be their thing as much, unless they're pulled into it or associated with it in any way like being friends with a predator or something. Cuz for half the group im not seeing that much interest in sex and women overall😂 and the other half in which i see it, there is a level of respect and admiration there as well, and actually predators dont even do it for the sex they just enjoy the power they have in that moment, they enjoy hurting. I haven't picked up on such energy with the guys - they have better things to do.

If anything crime related happened i would rather guess it would be either something with substances or reckless behvaiour for example drunk driving or something or eventually physical violence. But as i said those are my guesses for POTENTIAL things that could happen if the guys would slip onto a darker road. They don't have to tho, and i dont think they would. At least i hope they dont.

[gengor]

So I like bcs and brb a lot but it’s kind of been bothering me that I haven’t seen much talk about this in regards to either show bcs or brb and I’m not the best person to elaborate on this but I do wanna talk about the way the show writes it’s Latino characters and follows up on them in bcs. 

I’m not gonna get into all the ways breaking bad uses Mexican culture in offensive ways to show Walter’s dissent into dangerous territory bc im hoping that this is obvious to most people. What I am gonna talk about is the way bcs fails to respond to this criticism in a meaningful way. 

So better call saul is a show thats essentially about exploring nature, nurture, and one’s own free will over the person they choose to become. It’s about humanizing Saul into someone we can understand and empathize with. In the time in Jimmy’s life when he was trying to improve as a person he had his brother bait him and manipulate him into committing felonies bc he wanted to feel superior. People in his life drilled it into his brain that he was incapable of being honest so why even bother? The phrase ‘he was born like this’ gets used more than a few times. The show also gives a lot of character work to Mike as well. And although Mike was never painted as malicious he can be incredibly indifferent to the pain of other characters. Bcs let us see emotionally heavy scenes with him where he’s more vulnerable than he ever was in breaking bad. So theres an established pattern of adding more complexity to one of the one-dimensional ‘bad guys’ of breaking bad by making them act differently than how they would in breaking bad. Can you see where I’m going with this?

Rewatching the show after I’d already seen it gave this weird thematic dissonance to way the show reintroduced any Salamanca character. Like as soon as we see Tuco we as the audience are supposed to be in on the joke. Like…Oh, we know that guy already. And of course, the show plays with the audience already knowing Tuco while Saul doesnt to dangle the high stakes of the situation in front of us for drama. Because we as the audience know that Tuco is and probably always was hot-headed and violent to satirical degrees. Other characters even chime in to reiterate that Tuco was always like this. Every single Salamanca family member is treated this way.

 And bc of the way bcs is trying to redeem and humanize it’s previously established white characters just makes this kind of even worse than breaking bad to me. Bc people were vocal about how breaking bad employed a lot of anti-Latino tropes within its writing so you'd think that bcs would try and take this opportunity to amend the writing a bit right? 

You could argue that this is what Ignacio’s character is supposed to do for the show. He’s a Jessie parallel. He’s not really a bad person he’s just incredibly in over his head. And while I do appreciate his presence in the show and like him I feel like it should have been more than just him. 

By far the biggest missed opportunity here to me was the lack of humanization that Lalo got. And I get he’s popular, I feel like that mostly due to how Tony Dalton played him in a very charismatic way. But god he was such a missed opportunity for a thematic follow-through. The way other characters talk about the Salamancas is exactly the kind of predetermination the show is trying to critique with jimmy. When Ignacio is roped into spying on Lalo to aid Gus in killing him he goes in already being incredibly suspicious of Lalo due to his family. He has reason to want this guy to be evil since he’s got to help kill him to save his own skin and his father's. He not only assumes this guy is evil based on his family, he /needs/ Lalo to be irredeemable. Then you're telling me that against all themes and narrative storytelling devices Lalo is just conveniently the guy he assumed he would be. Like, imagine if Lalo got to be a Jimmy parallel, a guy who’s acting out the role people assume he's supposed to fill bc no one thinks he can be anything else. Not humanizing Lalo and ignoring the potential to explore and humanize any other previously established or mentioned latino characters…its like the show is breaking its own thematic statements in order to keep the racism. 

[damnedrainbows]

not doing good, bad day for autism. rant below of an autistic woman who’s made this iteration of a rant probsbly far too many times

you know I often advocate for myself and my community, get pissed when I hear shit like ‘curing autism’, embracing my own autism, but most of the time I realize if someone offered me a cure I’d take it. And I don’t even care that that would erase who I am as a person because I’ve come to find out that so much of me is because of my autism, maybe it’s the lesser of two evils

because maybe earlier if I recognized things better maybe I would have seen my brother was getting distressed when we were playing around and he said to stop. thing is the kid does that all the time, playfully saying stop and then getting annoyed when you listen cause he was joking. But no, he was actually upset and according to my family “I should have recognized the tone was different”

maybe when my gf started venting I would have acknowledged that they were just looking to vent and weren’t wanting my rigid solutions

and maybe I could still stare at my art without my eyes feeling like it’ll catch fire because I can’t…look at light that long anymore!

you know I make all these jokes and post funny things with me and gb where I say things without thinking it through and it can be hilarious, but most of the time it’s just. GUTTING. a reminder that no matter how much I”ve studied human behavior since childhood to avoid shit like this, it’ll just keep happening, and it’s not as endearing as I wish it could be, because people just get sick of it

I know I’ve probably bored my friends to tears with the different but same plot of ‘character learning they’re autistic’ because I do that plot so much or something related to autism because it’s my cope lmao I get to act out how I wish most people treated me, I get to resolve trauma with character that were mistreat3d because of it. it’s a plot that I’ll never get tired of doing because I need it

and then on top of everything, my tablet pen, one that is no longer made because they don’t make my tablet anymore, is GONE. I don’t know where, I just had it. And I mean, JUST had it. I’ve been drawing with it all day. I set it down, I don’t know where, and it’s gone!

and all this when I’m already nervous as fuck for my hair appointment tomorrow. you want to know why? scared of the hair dryer. what kind of pathetic pussy…cries at having their hair dried? I never liked grooming growing up, and itks why I never brush my hair, but who the fuck cries at a hair dryer, I haven’t had my hair dried by one of those since my sensitivity worsened. I don’t want to imagine the hell. and of course the appointment is made in the evening as her last client because I can’t be trusted to you know be normal

AND THEN I GET REPRIMANDED FOR NOT HELPING WITH THE FUCKING TV REMOTE THATS BROKEN WHEN IM HAVING A MELT DOWN “could you not sit down with me and show me for a few minutes?” NO I CANT BECAUSE I JUST SPENT THEPAST FIFTEEN MINUTES SLAMMING MY HEAD IN THE SHOWER

im not good it’s just not good. i want my fucking tablet pen i want to be normal. i want to…i cant even say what i want to do without having people worried for my safety. i just.

i can’t deal with being me much longer

[aslongasimhereyoureinvincible]

what are your neurodivergent headcanons for hq characters?

asdfjhgfds sorry this has been in my askbox for a few days ive been busy w/ Life Stuff TM but anyways ND haikyuu headcanons lets gooo

hinata:

ik bc hes Sunshiney and Loud lots of ppl read hinata as adhd, which i can deffo see, but personally i read him as autistic

hes extroverted and good at adopting introverts (kageyama, kenma, yachi, tsukki) but when u stop to think abt it hes also actually kinda bad at social ques and 'normal' behaviour?? i think ppl dont notice bc hes also rlly nice but hinata is actually pretty blunt lmao

his special interest is literally volleyball cmon now

its canon that he dislikes being in classes too long or doing homework bc he finds sitting still for too long difficult, both me and my autistic older brother used to get up and pace around our classrooms when we were younger

even though hes rlly athletic and has insane reflexes obviously, hes also pretty clusmy and especially bad at judging distances which to me looks like dyspraxia which is really commonly comorbid w/ autism

ive also read a few fics where he has tourettes syndrome w/ body tic and i can deffo see why ppl would hc that

idk hes just reads as autistic so well in my mind like idk why its not a more common take

kageyama:

this one is less of a headcanon and moreso just interpreting the text correctly; hes definitely autistic

like its my belief that furudate either knowingly wrote kageyama as autistic or like based his personality off of an irl autistic person they knew or SOMETHING bc its actually insane how well he reads as autistic

the lack of social skills? the anger issues? the deep special interest in volleyball? the just wanting to express your feelings/opinions but coming off as rude but not knowing how to fix that? middle school being a living hell? having that one family member who Got you? the high level of skill in one particular area? hes literally the texboox definition of autism

even the little things like how he files his nails and jokes go over his head and he accidentally insults ppl bc hes calling it how he sees it and how he basically had no friends growing up bc he was too focused on volleyball and how he struggles to smile on command like!!! thats autism babe!!!!!!

oh also hes dyslexic bc im dyslexic and i say so

ushijima:

same as kageyama i bet he was either knowing written as autistic or based off of an irl person who is

blunt as all hell, monotone voice and facial expressions, volleyball as a special interest, bad at social interaction, accidentally rude, the list goes on and on

like his whole thing about how his left handedness makes him different but is also a gift that benefits him in some ways? thats a metaphor for neurodivergency dont @ me

oikawa:

i hc him as having narcisstic personality disorder, not in the ableist reddit-user 'all ppl w/ npd are evil manipulative abusers' way but in the ' i have npd and know what it actually looks like' way

hiding massive insecurities by acting like youre amazing?? that fuckin marina lyric thats like 'i feel like im the worst so i always act like im the best'?? that was abt oikawa tooru and npd

feeling threatened the second someone as good or better than you shows up? fixating on one specific thing that you have to be the best at? those are npd as fuck traits

the way he can basically get along with anyone and adjust his play style to suit them but only has a few close friendships where he can let his true personality rlly shine through

hes literally so npd coded augh <3

bokuto:

i read him as adhd and having cyclothymia

i think he was unmedicated in high school and unknowingly had depressive and hypomanic episodes which affected his play

he also very much reads as having rejection sensitive dysphoria if u ask me

and the way he talks and bounces around and has All That Damn Energy gives me adhd vibes, esp pared w/ his poor volume control ad the way he ignores social cues lol

okay quickfire round bc im getting tired of typing

atsumu is autistic, so is osamu for that matter, theyre just at very different points on the spectrum and rub each other up the wrong way a lot of the time bc of it

kita is also autistic bc no neurodivergent person is that particular about doing things the 'right' way

hoshiumi is autistic and adhd

asahi and yamaguchi read like they struggled w/ anxiety and depression

sakusa has ocpd and ocd (contamination ocd specifically) and mysophobia

kyoutani has aspd, again not in a 'aspd = violent agressive psychopaths' way but in a 'i actually have a cluster b personality disorder' way, and adhd also

kenma is autistic and has social anxiety

yachi has social anxiety too bc cmon now

tsukki reads to me as having chronic depression, i think i could also make a case for him being autistic too ngl

tendou is some flavour of neurodivergent, probally audhd, probably some other stuff, idk but hes definitely not neurotypical

like hinata, lev reads as autistic to me even tho hes got that goodball energy thatd make lots of ppl read him as adhd bc like,, he just fuckin sucks at social interaction like he is accidentally rude all the damn time lmaoo

fukunaga and aone are both autistic w/ selective mutism and/or partial to moderate non-verbalness

obviously its none of my business and i think having headcanons abt irl ppl is Fucking Weird but i wouldnt be surprised if furudate themself was autistic bc truly so many characters in haikyuu can be read that way if u ask me, although maybe im just projecting lol

[d3df1zh]

HIIIII!!! my name is clover and this is my intro post. i WOULD make an about page but i really don't want to bc im lazy keep reading if u wanna know thingz abt me bc this will take a while trust

okay so, i go by he/she/they. I am a minor and i don't know if i'll post a lot but i got some heavy fandom opinions i might share bc i get kind of passionately rage-filled at some things.

i'm also aroace!! interests!!! ☆ there's a lot so be warned

any colored, bold interests are ones im REALLY into so you dont get bored reading - if you havent gotten bored already

only bold interests are ones i adore but aren't fixating on at the moment my interests are ANYTHING cuphead related (casino cups, etc.), gravity falls, splatoon, idv (i dont play the game bc i suck but i love the lore + chars), undertale/verse, HORRORTALE ESPECIALLY, silent hill, rdr2, resident evil, lego monkie kid, jttw, any mythology really, scott pilgrim, heathers, coroika.. kind of?, tmnt (2012 & 1987), white day; a labyrinth named school, the path (videogame), sonic, FNAF, madoka magica, serial experiments lain, MY OCS!!! (I HAVE DOCS ON ALMOST ALL OF THEM PLEASE ASK ABOUT THEM!!!!), um jammer lammy, hollow knight, fictional horror, PETSCOP, luna game, cookie run kingdom, REGRETEVATOR!!

i have more interests but they're more minute so its unnecessary to name ALL of them also theres already a fuck ton of text soooo ! oh i also like making my own versions of aus (especially problematic ones or poorly written ones (ofc im not bullying any creators of aus by saying them and their creativity sucks, they don't suck, but some popular aus are just..... ugeeeeehhh. also some creators are bad people so they kind of deserve it. I just want to make a better space for fans of said aus.)) byf ☆

i am anti-sanscest, i find it weird, im sorry

i really do try not to be super mean in a rant/opinion but i will be passionate and stern about it

i am somewhat a spicynoodles anti? i just don't like it, im sorry ^same with purecacao

i make sexual jokes sometimes, not very often in public though

i block whatever and whomever i want /lh

i dog on mischaracterizations of my favs a LOT (or just mischaracterizations of any character) (staring at you 'horror' sans fans) (i'll made a small rant on my main abt the mischaracterization of horrortale sans and i'll do it again. it'll be on my queue and be way firmer stg!!)

if i accidentally interact while im on ur dni list, PLEASE feel free to block me! I like posts mindlessly so I don't often check dni lists unless i want to follow someone!

dni ☆

basic criteria, vivziepop supporters, hazbin hotel/helluva fans, dsmp/qsmp fans, zionists/pro-israel mfs, pro/comshippers, whitewashers or ppl who think blackwashing is real, i think thats it just don't be weird

that might be it, i'll freely edit this if i want to make any changes!! :3 hope i can make some quality content (i will not)

[imraespace]

GANG IM BACK AFTER GRIEVING OVER MY GRADES AND I HAVE DECIDED TO LOCK TF IN THIS TIME (.. hopefulyl.)

A CPT IS LIKE A FINAL PROJECT OF LIKE EVERYTHING YOU LEARNED BASICALLY AND ITS USUALLT WORTH 15% OF UR GRADE BUT DEPENDS ON THE COURSE AND USUALLT EXAM IS ALSO 15% its displayed on like the course syllabus but for some reason our science cpt is only worth 10%??? so idk how that chem cpt is worth 5% like if it was 5% per unit cuz theres chem bio physics for our science course then 5 x 3 is 15 but the math isnt mathing if the cpt is only worth 10% on the syllabus???????? SO THATS WHY IM CONFUSED AND ALSO WHY TF IS THERE A CHEM CPT AND IT TEACHES US A WHOLE NEW CONCEPT?? LIKE HUH WHAT

i also have a history cpt due on monday and another cpt due wednesday so that is fun AND I HAVENT STARTED BOTH HELPME I NEED TO ACC GET ONTO THAT ILL JUST WAKE UP EALRY TOMORROW….. 6 am grind trust…..

i just memorized the map for europe 1914 but i keep confusing denmark and sweden but its ok bc my test is monday …. i will be tweaking out bc apparently he makes the alternative test version harder and im taking that cuz my kidney appointment was on friday and the original test date was kn friday so im like lowk scared … STOP THIS. 💔

OH AND MY SAE PLSUH CAME IN TODAYYAYAYA i got a free clip and bracelet so now im gonna amke my rin and sae plushies recreate that one scene muehhehehe im #Evil rn STOP or ill make them hug depending. MY MOM APPARENTLY LOVES SAE BTw??? LIKE SHE SAW HIM AS A PLUSH AND SHE WAS LIKE i want that get me my card and paid 85 dollars for it HELPME STOP im also waiting on the yukimiya volume………. and im thinking like oh maybe i shouldve just waited to buy all the bllk manga cuz theres yk these bundles of like mangas 1-6!! and i save like 10 dollars or so from it bc of tax and im like Ugh i couldve saved money but in reality that 10 dollars saved wouldve webt jnto buying tiny bllk figures and it makes like no difference HELp SO IT DOESNT REALLT MATTER I GUESS ……. 💔💔

umumum nothing has happened other than OH WAIT I BOUGHT TWO ONESIES HELPME ONE ISNA FOX AND ANOTHER IS A DOG AND I WANNA WEAR IT FOR HALLOWEEN LIKE FOR SCHOOL AND IM THINKING LIKE OH DO I REALLY WANT TO BC WHAT IF PPL CALL ME A FURRY BUT ITS LITERALLT SO COMFY STOP.. like…. let me live its so comfy…… and very warm so idk if i acc will wear it cuz sometimes my school blasts the heaters after 12 pm BUT I MIGHT 😈

umumum okaya thats actuallt all that hapepned HELPME

OKAY DAILY QUESTION IS UM who in bllk would be really good at eating salmon sashimi bc i want salmon sashimi rn.

- 🐙

HAIIII YOU WERE MISSED DEARLY by me

IM GLAD YOU LOCKED IN I gotta lock in soon exams are almost here..

OH THAT SOUNDS.. confusing🤨 I MEAN IT MAKES SENSE but also sounds confusing that kinda reminds me of SBAS here but instead you do an SBA when you reach senior level bc your SBA overall grade adds to your FINAL FINALL exam mark the one you do to leave the school ykyk

I WISH YOU LUCK DAMG I'll be procrastinating like crazy

WHAT IN THE FAC A WHOLE MAP?? I feel bad for yall geography and history students.. whatever you're doing idk ever since i started business my knowledge narrowed (im joking)

OMG SAE PLUSH MSHDJAJS

HELO.EE MAKE THEM HUG🤬🤬

AW THATS SI CUTE my momma saw chigiri and asked who's girlchild is that!!?😊😊

idk anything abt money there.. but ik it has more value than mine so I'll be mad SHOULDVE SSVED UP THAT 10 DOLLARS ANS BUY MORE FIGURINES🗣🗣🗣

I started sneezing after reading this I'm allergic to you....😕😕😕

AW THATS SI CUTE BUT HELP FURRY I WISH I COULD DRESS UP FOR HALLOWEEN BUT MY SCHOOL HAS A STUPID ASS UNIFORM AND WE CANT ENTER THE SCHOOL IF WE DONT HAVE THE ACHOOL LOGO ON😒😒😒😒

erm what has happened to me this week🤔🤔 um.. OH we don't laugh.. but long long ago!! I used to play league of legends BUT WITH MY BROTHERS AND MOMMA but I stopped bc someone on dc asked if i stink bc he saw it on my profile but whatever.. I kinda.. wanna play it again.. bc I saw character I like.. PLUS THE NETFLIX SERIES FOR THE GAME ARCANE which I love #VIFORLIFE LEMME AT HER is literally coming out in November ITS SO SOON anyways

ISNT HE LIKE HOT?? it's all the same person but different skins THERES MORE HOT PPL THERE IN HIDING BRO THE PLAYERS JJST SCARE YOU AWAY☹️☹️😕😕😕😞😞

not the heaters.. the heater in our school is the darn sun! only a certain group of students gets AC and only like the library.. my group has fans then classes battle for bc apparently THEYRE TOO BROKE RO BUY ONE😒😒

UMUM ILL SAY REO HELP

[sopordeficiency]

nah i dont think he's evil harry potter??? that was just a visual joke mostly. if anything i guess he's like, draco malfoy cause of the racism. also i havent watched the movies in years or ever read the books so maybe that has something to do with this, but i dont really relate to eridan to HP at all.

Like, he's more of an analogue to hipster culture? He tries to be so special, he thinks he's sooo special, he's a warmomgering 13 year old. he's my funny little guy, also, someone pLEASE get him so character development.

I guess as a character i like him more because i can give him a path to walk on that isnt canon, you know? its free range for imagining what couldve been and as a fan that's fun.

going back to his personality and stuff, he's pathetic, like a wet sopping cat that scratches and bites. but like, every kid has done something cringe worthy when it comes to dealing with relationships with others. personally i sucked at it so bad in school that i became an introvert lmao. i guess i relate to him in some way?? idk im thinking this up as i go.

he's just SO lonely, even when he has a relationship to speak of, he's still lonely, no one has ever taken him seriously. thats kinda hard to go through, so he lashes out and does all of these exorbitant things to get attention. it's pretty easy to follow once you notice all he ever wanted was recognition. which, like, as kids trying to prove themselves is super normal. he's desperate to BE someone. everything about him is a theatre he puts up.

there was a truth he was supposed to find but the way the story had to play out didnt have that factor in it, so he stayed his ugly self and was never given the option to change. i think a lot about (vriska) and how she changed so much and was (possibly) molded into this new self, that she liked better, she was happy for once, but she also lost herself (maybe????). then i think about those spare eridans we see being happy when theyve died and been doomed (god tier eridan with feferi, eridan with shrek dad). i think one found himself and the other lost himself.

hmmm, i guess thats it? i like what they did with his gender non-comformity down the line, even though i didnt get it at first, for this character, but ill take what i can get (im nb).

i guess he's just fun to think about! what even is his authentic self anyway?? he was always putting up a show and putting up a mask that he felt is what people needed to see of him. i dont think we caught much of what the actual eridan is like. a nerdy kid who still wishes so much that magic was real, he's into history, he likes to roleplay, he's into ships and nautical war tactics, he didnt want to lose his only friend so he lied and went into a relationship that didnt take his actual feelings into account (i mean theyre meant to be pale anyway). he can never speak up about how he truly feels, he needs to be what people think him to be, or what he thinks he needs to be. he's so tired, dude. keeping up that drama is exhausting.

i guess, even if he did want to exterminate all landwellers, whatever that meant, im sure he knew it was an impossible thing anyway. or maybe he kept telling himself he might be able to pull it off? but the troll empire needs it working class anyway. the only reason he didn't do it was because 1) he was busy feeding feferi's lusus, 2) it would hurt feferi's feelings.

alright yeah i think thats all i had to say, i just like to look at him also, he's got a cape! how silly! very aesthetic or whatever the kids say today

So... Eridan fans. I have a question!

What even is there to like about this guy? Is it just that he's an evil Harry Potter analogue and that's an interesting twist on an archetype you already love? Because I never read a Potter book or saw the moives and I figure that's a large part of why I didn't see the appeal.

[archer3-13]

I think why hubert doesn't do it for me is that outside of the smug evil that falls off him like clouds, he comes across rather one note in a lot of other ways. Like, i wont deny that theres glimpses of something else there, but like so much in fodlan it just kinda sits there uncommented on or really observed in anyway.

longggg under the cut

To sorta point to a relatively striking comparison on the matter, the hxh character of shaiapouf shares a lot of similarities with hubert when it comes to the essential basics. they both pride themselves on being the smart planner of the servants, they're both unrepentantly evil and manipulative when it comes to achieving their goals, and they're both so intently devoted and loyal to a single individual as to stake their entire lifes purposes on making sure their liege is successful and prosperous.

but, aside from the surface level presentations being on opposite ends of the spectrum pouf putting on a show of refined elegance well hubert presents himself as the evil vizier, i think what helps elevate pouf over hubert for me is that pouf gets to experience a lot wider set of emotions and scenarios that help to very strongly define him on a very deliberate level by the narrative. one of the many thematic levers at play in hxh's chimera ant arc is commentary on loyalty, being loyal to a bad person, how loyalty can shift and change because of environment and circumstance, and importantly in poufs case how loyalty can mean different things for different people. pouf is the most fanatical of the chimera ant royal guard, but that fanaticism is to a highly idealized and glamourized ideal of the chimera ant king which causes him to act disloyal and pursue objectives contrary to the kings actual desires because pouf assumes he knows better and has absolute faith in that certainty. that certainty drives him to act in cruel and erratic manners as well if it means securing any advantage possible to achieve his idealized view of the king. its only after being psychically mind linked to the kings feelings does pouf breakdown and accept that the king has his own desires to pursue, dying not long after because of poison still desperately wanting to serve the king because of his inherent nature as a chimera ant royal guard. And thats the element thats missing from hubert really. not poufs exact storybeats mind, but more so that conflict of character with ideals and reality. As others have noted, huberts relation to edelgard is ridiculously one sided compared to other retainers in the game, even when you go down the romantic option for hubert and edelgard where her immediate assumption of huberts confession is that its a joke and their actual end crawl text together being remarkably cordial for people supposedly in love. Yet for someone who routinely goes out of his way to pick the murdery option to further his lieges goals, it never comes up as a point of contention between them that edelgard could give less of a shit about hubert putting so much of himself on the line to further her goals, or even just the implied tendency of the two to disagree on methodology. we dont get much of any insight into how much resentment hubert might be feeling about it all, the implied conflicts of methodology remain firmly in the background and deemphasized as much as the game can, and for a character so willing to go behind his lieges back to further what he thinks is best for them we never really get to see the twos relation thrown into any sort of conflict because of this. one or the other will grumble about the others actions, and then they just keep going regardless.

[monarchisms]

a large chunk of writers in the ah community (hell a large chunk of the ah community full stop) are white and it shows in how a good sum of them write non-white characters. its an issue in all fanfiction about non-white characters/people written by white people. often theyre reduced make them one-note, one joke, one purpose narrative tools that often rely on weird racist fanon that interprets them as uwu smol beans or total evil bad!!! no matter what role said character might play in the story. theres no development or character study, no room for complex ideas and concepts. its something white writers (myself included) need to unlearn because from learning about this from bipoc whp are creators that i know, ive learnt just how blatant it is (especially when it comes to black people in fandom and the treatment of black characters. thats a WHOLE connected and massive issue).

I'm glad you've pointed this out in the AH fandom because the way people choose still to focus on ryans character instead of the many new personalities and members that have been added in the recent year is incredibly telling about where the focus lies. Racism isn't just the blatant stuff we see on reddit. It's ingrained and needs active work to unlearn and it should be recognised and rectified if spaces like these are going to be made safe for BIPOC who are fans and/or creators.

:) <3

i have a bad habit of putting the most important stuff i want to say in the tags, especially in regards to subjects like racism in fandom, and part of that is due to the fear of being harassed. going forward, i'm going to try to kill that habit, because i've truly been through a lot of shit; from everything with haywood since last october, to the constant, rampant attacks towards mica, fiona, ky, bk, and every other member, guest, and fan of color since i first joined the fandom back in early 2014, and much longer before i even joined. hell, i rarely mention that i'm black because of all this shit. i'm still scared of being harassed, but at this point, i truly have nothing to lose.

frankly, a reason why a decent chunk of the AH fandom, and any fandom in general, are white is because fans of color just don't feel safe. either that, or they're ran out of what they thought was an inclusive, welcoming community due to the harassment they received. in the worst case scenario, that harassment can lead to someone taking their own life, but that's considered too taboo to talk about in a white-dominated fandom space.

the beef i personally have with fanfiction writers in this community is, along with everything you've said, that they treat the real people they're writing about as purely fictional ocs. this is why i believe that people are still writing the vagabond or the mad king or whatever fucking character ryan came up with as if it were their own. they use the bullshit "separate the art from the artist" excuse because they know what they're doing is wrong, but they don't care enough to stop. they just want to find some lame justification to get away with it. it's the same thing when general fans, especially white fans, pretend the blatantly racist comments they spew are totally fine because, in their words, "it's just criticism."

they're too stubborn to change. and i guess, so am i, in a way? despite everything, i'm still here, because no matter what, i'm too stubborn to leave.

[youranxiousnerd]

The Transformation Thoughts

bc hsmtmts said gay rights

spoilers below

yesss seb doing the recap

wait did seb just say he was crying?!?! give him a hug 

cow baby!!!

wow miss jenn and seb having a civil conversation

Natalie is back!!

ej and ricky with the mask

kourtney’s outfit!!!

ashlyn’s outfit...

ahh so the awards and the show are separate, good, that’s how it works

RICKY’S SHIRT!?!?!?! 

i love it

ricky is lgbt do not try to convince me otherwise

ASHLYN IS SINGING IT IS BEAUTIFUL

like pop off

ricky and the mask

that mask is the true villain in season 2

“Belle, I-” flops

Ashlyn is carrying the scene, she is such a good Belle

how is ricky allowed on stage oh my god

the cap

that damn mask

“It’s okay, it was just my face”

Miss Jenn is hanging on by a thread

finally some ashlyn and ricky content

“Which they will” buddy have you faced the music? Have you seen Ricky?

“I think I might have been playing Troy at one point”

Miss Jenn needs help from someone who isn’t a teenager

“Mother is freaking out” High school theater at it’s finest

“There is math involved”

“OH” 

sassy seb

i can’t with east high’s tech crew, what are you doing?!?!

and why are the actors figuring out the tech stuff?!? i’m sure kourt, big red, ashlyn (she knows all), and seb (he lives on a farm) know what to do. 

the crew cannot be that bad

btw here are my thoughts on this scene

guys it is ashlyn’s house not yours

portwell shoulder bump

ASHLYN I LOVE YOU

OH SO NOW YOU HAVE DRILLS

WHERE WERE THEY WHEN THE TECHIES STARTED USING GLUE ON PLYWOOD!?!?!?!

I WANT ANSWERS

i. cannot. with. this. show.

lily wtf

“is this too weird” yes

like why?

lily like actually shut up

big red’s “wtf”

let her be evil damnit

“i’m just not well liked here” i wonder why

that was really weird, anyways

“he gets weird around tools”

me too

no give big red the drill he knows how to use it

someone write a fic about the girls and seb’s chaotic target run

why don’t you have a blackout and dramatic music and lights for the transformation, i know it isn’t award level but if done right it can be pretty dope

“I don’t know if my parents will be okay with me being at a co-ed sleepover”

“Chip, this is your mother speaking, go call your mother”

HE DID THE FINGER GUNS

GAY TABLE SIT AND FINGER GUNS THEY DID THEIR RESEARCH

ashlyn’s bucket

CARLOS GAY TABLE SIT

OH MY GOD

they’re so gay soulmates

let big red have his skateboards

“i need to talk to seb at some point but it can wait” honey no it can’t wait seb is on the verge of a breakdown

wait they havent talked in a week

Im a hypocrite ive been dancing around someone for three years

“You’re still at school”

“I’m worried about my children” “She means us”

such a high school theater thing (like i got married during high school theater, we had a family tree)

“ah, Sebby”

“Now I’m pretty sad” give him a hug

the girls ship seblos

“But, I guess he has to be, out of default, right... there’s not a lot of choices for a boy like Carlos, here, at East.”

alright here come the tears 

why...why couldn’t he say “gay” or “queer” or “lgbt”?!?!

“Not so good at saying the feelings part out loud”

shiz that hit close to home. 

Seb is just making me cry today, isn’t he?

wait so we’re just going to change the subject? coming from a queer person, opening up about your problems about your sexuality is hard. like, there are things that happened years ago im just telling people. 

“You’re my sister, he’s my cousin”

it seems everyone except nina knows about the chocolates. imagine gossip time when gina told people write a fic

Nini just stop talking. It wasn’t a big deal, simple mistake. Not everything has to be big and dramatic

and wasn’t she just asking about Gina and Ej? 

Nini for the love of god it is not something to read into.

“The farmer type”

Ash and Red exchanging gossip

wait... why are they texting about this?

“Why wouldn’t he say something to me?” It’s a hard conversation to have. “hey are we together just because i’m your only option?” 

“Okay, pretty boy” HE CALLED HIM PRETTY BOY

RICKY!!!!!!!!!!

!!!

carlos and gina chaotic siblings

give ej a hug 

“Sweet boy”

im so glad the guys are talking about their feelings.

Why a sleepover? It’s more of a hangout.

“Verging on failure”

jennzara therapy

slowwww burn

you go from hand holding to fist bump

disney please release an acoustic version of “let you go”

so it’s just carlos and ricky chillin’ at big red’s house?

do not play let you go for nini

do. not.

“You guys are a hallmark movie”

for once ricky is being smart

“the look on your face when you were talking about Seb tonight” smiles

he is so whipped

“I think you and Seb have something worth fighting for...bro”

that was so sweet and then there is bro

i love this show

“Sorry, I’m adjusting to being called bro” 

him and seb being awkward about feelings... that is a high school relationship

i love ricky in this scene

“Yeah, let’s just write”

ASHLYN CALLED BIG RED BABE AWWWWW

nina shut the actual hell up

“It’s in the costume shop, somewhere” mood

“Thank you, 15″ THEY SAID THE THING

GAHHHH

I LOVE IT

howie and kourtney oh my god what is happening

 “and begging”

“hi” he’s so nervous oh my lord.

he is so awkward around seb 

it’s like a switch

“Do you want to get risotto with me sometime” OH MY GOD THATS ADORABLE

GINA BABY HE LIKES YOU 

GINA HONEY!!!

AWWW THAT WAS ADORABLE

PORTWELL YESSSS

gina’s little run

“Am I in trouble?” 

they’re so nervous 

oh my god its time

“You keep it all bottled up” GUYS I CANT ARGGGG

can ricky just like, go behind a curtain?

“lookin’ for our kind of love” carlos basically just said “i love you”

seb is so whipped like look at him?

they’re so in love

seb’s little eye role at “in a heartbeat, i choose you”

the hands omfg

oh my god they’re going to dance

SHIZ THE HOMECOMING SUITS

I WAS RIGHT

OH MY GOD

SHIT GUYS IM DYING

gah the hands i cant

carlos is leading i love it

the tie

a tie just killed me

im combusting

You’re honor, they’re in love

i really thought carlos was going in for a kiss he is probably getting one later

i like how the dance isn’t big, it’s small and a little awkward bc right then it’s just them.

THEYRE SO IN LOVE HOLY SHIT

damnit big red

big red is legally required to interrupt almost kiss moments especially if it’s an lgbt kiss bc we cant have two in one season

in a heartbeat is so cute. Frankie showed UP this season with the vocals. there is no way that was all acting bc they looked so in love.

I...I love it

the lyrics are perfect

In a Heartbeat and Let You Go are probably the best OG songs of the season

“Siri, add In a Heartbeat to my gay sob playlist”

these boys are just serenading each other left and right 

“Yeah” 

so it’s just “yeah”!?!? That’s it!?!?! Seb could have least kissed him on the cheek or did they use all their kisses?

I love the song and love the scene, but there is so much more to discuss. Are we going to brush over the fact that Seb literally had an allergic reaction and didn’t get help because he didn’t want to disappoint Carlos!?!? Are we going to brush over “no, seb” and seb feeling like he has to get carlos big things!?! One “yeah” doesn’t erase all that. I’m hoping we get closure, proper closure, not a joke. 

In conclusion, only one thing was settled (Carlos loves Seb for Seb, not because he is the only out guy in school).

“Seb and Carlos suffer their first fight” effing liars

BTW it looks like they filmed the dance scene with the homecoming suits and normal outfits so disney release the footage

Ricky is the biggest Seblos shipper

“Bro”

you morons. are you using rigging without an adult there?!?!

im pretty sure that isn’t allowed. only trained people were allowed to use the rigging. it should be Natalie since she did it in HSM

you should have gotten mats are something or stand in a circle

gahhh

RICKY

OH MY FRICKING GOD

NO ONE RAN THEY JUST WATCHED WTF

WTF WAS THAT ENDING

UMMMMM NO

i legit have no words oh my god 

they just killed the lead

you guys saw the rope you should have ran 

you should have gotten mats or blankets or something just in case

rigging is difficult, set rigging and people rigging

EAST HIGH WTF

Looks like the sleepover is going to be in the ER

My gay heart is full but my theater heart is screaming. The episode went by really fast. I liked it, like a lot.

To answer the question, no, I am not okay @organic-guacamole and we will have a theater kid sleepover

[supercantaloupe]

okay yeah actually, i’ll bite. i’ve got some of my own thoughts about the unsleeping city and cultural representation and i’m gonna make a post about them now, i guess. i’ll put it under a cut though because this post is gonna be long.

i wanna start by saying i love dimension 20 and i really really enjoy the unsleeping city. i look forward to watching new episodes every week, and getting hooked on d20 as a whole last summer really helped pull me out of a pandemic depression, and i’m grateful to have this cool show to be excited about and interested in and to have met so many cool people to talk about it with.

that being said, however, i think there is a risk run in representing any group of people/their culture when you have the kind of setting that tuc has. by which i mean, tuc is set in a real world with real people and real human cultures in it. unlike fantasy high or a crown of candy where everything is made up (even if rooted in real-world cultures), tuc is explicitly rooted in reality, and all of its diversity -- both the ups and downs that go with it. and especially set in new york of all places, one of the most densely, diversely populated cities on earth. the cast is 7 people; it’s great that those 7 people come from a variety of backgrounds and identities and all bring their own unique perspectives to the table, and it’s great that those people and the entire crew are generally conscious of themselves and desire to tell stories/represent perspectives ethically. but you simply cannot authentically represent every culture or every perspective in the world (or even just in a city) when your cast is 7 people. it’s an impossible task. this is inherent to the setting, and acknowledged by the cast, and by brennan especially, who has been on record saying how one of the exciting aspects of doing a campaign set in nyc is its diversity, the fact that no two new yorkers have the same perspective of new york. i think that’s a good thing -- but it does have its challenges too, clearly.

i’m not going to go into detail on the question of whether or not tuc’s presentation of asian and asian american culture is appropriative/offensive or not. first of all, i don’t feel like it’s 100% fair to judge the show completely yet, since it’s a prerecorded season and currently airing midseason, so i don’t yet know how things wrap up. secondly, i’m not asian or asian american. i can have my own opinions on that content in the show, but i think it’s worth more to hear actual asian and asian american voices on this specific aspect of the show. having an asian american cast member doesn’t automatically absolve the show of any criticisms with regard to asian american cultural representation/appropriation, whether those criticisms are made by dozens of viewers or only a handful of them. regardless, i don’t think it’s my place as someone who is not asian to speak with any authority on that issue, and i know for a fact that there are asian american viewers sharing their own opinions. their thoughts in this instance hold more water than mine, i think.

what i will comment on in more depth, though, is a personal frustration with tuc. i’m jewish; i’ve never really been shy about that fact on my page here. i’m not from new york, but i visit a few times a year (or i did before covid anyway, lol), and i have some family from nyc. nyc, to me, is a jewish city. and for good reason, since it’s home to one of the largest jewish populations of the country, and even the world, and aspects of jewish culture (including culinary, like bagels and pastrami, and linguistic, like the common use of yiddish words and phrases in english colloquial speech) are prevalent and celebrated among jews and goyim alike. when i think of nyc, i think of a jewish city; that’s not everybody’s new york, but that’s my new york, and thats plenty of other people’s new york too. so i do find myself slightly disappointed or frustrated in tuc for its, in my opinion, rather stark lack of jewish representation.

now, i’m not saying that one of the PCs should have been jewish, full stop. i love to headcanon iga as jewish even though canon does not support that interpretation, and i’m fine with that. she’s not my character. it’s possible that simply no one thought of playing a jewish character, i dunno. but also, and i can’t be sure about this, i’m willing to bet that none of the players really wanted to play a jewish character because they didn’t want to play a character of a marginalized culture they dont belong to in the interest of avoiding stereotyping or offensive representation/cultural appropriation. (i don’t know if any of the cast members are jewish, but i’m assuming not.) and the concern there is certainly appreciated; there’s not a ton of mainstream jewish rep out there, and often what we get is either “unlikeable overly conservative hassidic jew” or “jokes about their bar mitzvah/one-off joke about hanukkah and then their jewishness is never mentioned ever again,” which sucks. it would be really cool to see some more good casual jewish rep in a well-rounded, three-dimensional character in the main cast of a show! even if there are a couple of stumbles along the way -- nobody is perfect and no two jews have the same level of knowledge, dedication, and adherence to their culture.

but at the same time, i look at characters like iga and i really do long for a jewish character to be there. siobhan isn’t polish, yet she’s playing a characters whose identity as a polish immigrant to new york is very central to her story and arc. and part of me wonders why we can’t have the same for a jewish character. if not a PC, then why not an NPC? again, i’m jewish, and i am not native, but in my opinion i think the inclusion of jj is wonderful -- i think there are even fewer native main characters in mainstream media than there are jewish ones, and it’s great to see a native character who is both in touch with their culture as well as not being defined solely by their native-ness. to what extent does it count as ‘appropriative’ because brennan is a white dude? i dunno, but i’m like 99% sure they talked to sensitivity consultants to make sure the representation was as ethical as they could get it, and anyway, i can’t personally see and glaring missteps so far. but again, i’m not native, and if there are native viewers with their own opinions on jj, i’d be really interested in hearing them.

but getting back to the relative lack of jewish representation. it just...disappoints me that jewishness in new york is hardly ever even really mentioned? again, i know we’re only just over halfway through season 2, but also, we had a whole first season too. and it’s definitely not all bad. for example: willy! gd, i love willy so much. him being a golem of williamsburg makes me really really happy -- a jewish mythological creature animated from clay/mud (in this case bricks) to protect a jewish community (like that of williamsburg, a center for many of nyc’s jews) from threat. golem have so often been taken out of their original context and turned into evil monsters in fantasy settings, especially including dnd. (even within other seasons of d20! crush in fh being referred to as a “pavement golem” always rubbed me the wrong way, and i had hoped they’d learned better after tuc but in acoc they refer to another monster as a “corn golem” which just disappointed me all over again.) so the fact that tuc gets golems right makes my jewish heart very happy.

and yet...he doesn’t show up that much? sure, in s1, he’s very helpful when he does, but in s2 so far he shows up once and really does not say or do much of anything. he speaks with a lot more yiddish-influenced language than other characters, but if you didn’t know those words were specifically yiddish/jewish, you might not be able to otherwise clock the fact that willy is jewish. and while willy is a jewish mythological creature who is jewish in canon, he isn’t human. there are no other direct references to judaism, jewish characters, or jewish culture in the unsleeping city beyond him.

there are, in fact, two other canon jewish characters in tuc. but...here’s where i feel the most frustration, i think. the two canon jewish humans in tuc are stephen sondheim and robert moses. both of whom are real actual people, so it’s not like we can just pick and choose what their cultural backgrounds are. as much as i love stephen sondheim, i think there are inherent issues with including real world people as characters in a fictional setting, especially if they are from living/recent memory (sondheim is literally still alive), but anyway, sondheim and moses are both actual jewish people. from watching tuc alone you probably would not be able to guess that sondheim is jewish -- nothing from his character except name suggests it, and i wouldn’t even fault you for not thinking ‘sondheim’ is a jewish-sounding surname (and i dislike the idea/attitude/belief that you can tell who is or isn’t jewish by the sound of their name). and yeah, i’m not going to sit here and be like “brennan should have made sondheim more visibly jewish in canon!” because, like, he’s a real human being and it’s fucking weird to portray him in a way that isn’t as close to how he publicly presents himself, which is not in fact very identifiably jewish? i don’t know, this is what i mean by it’s inherently weird and arguably problematic to portray real living people as characters in a fictional setting, but i digress. sondheim’s jewish, even if you wouldn’t know it; not exactly a representation win.

and then there’s bob moses. you might be able to guess that he’s jewish from canon, actually. there’s the name, of course. but more insidious to me are the specifics of his villainy. greedy and powerhungry, a moneyman, a lich whose power is stored in a phylactery...it does kind of all add up to a Yikes from me. (in the stock market fight there’s a one-off line asking if he has green skin; it’s never really directly acknowledged or answered, but it made me really uncomfortable to hear at first and it’s stuck with me since viewing for the first time.) the issue for me here is that the most obviously jewish human character is the season’s bbeg, and his villainy is rooted in very antisemitic tropes and stereotypes.

i know this isn’t all brennan’s fault -- robert moses was a real ass person and he was in fact jewish, a powerhungry and greedy moneyman, a big giant racist asshole, etc. i’m not saying that jewish characters can’t be evil, and i’m not saying brennan should have tried to be like “this is my NPC robert christian he’s just like bob moses but instead he’s a goy so it’s okay” because...that would be fuckin weird bro. and bob moses was a real person who was jewish and really did do some heinous shit with his municipal power. i’m not necessarily saying brennan should have picked/created a different character to be the villain. i’m not even saying that he shouldn’t have made bob moses a lich (although, again, it doesn’t 100% sit right with me). but my point here is that bob moses is one of a grand total of three canon jewish characters in tuc, of which only two humans, of whom he is the one you’d most easily guess would be jewish and is the most influenced by antisemitic stereotypes/tropes. had there been more jewish representation in the show at all, even just some neutral jewish NPCs, this would not be as much of a problem as it is to me. but halfway through season 2, so far, this is literally all we get. and that bums me out.

listen, i really like tuc. i love d20. but the fact that it is set in a real world place with real world people does inherently raise challenges when it comes to ethical cultural representation. especially when the medium of the show is a game whose creatures, lore, and mechanics have been historically rooted in some questionable racial/cultural views. and dnd is making progress to correct some of those misguided views of older sourcebooks by updating them to more equitably reflect real world racial/cultural sensitivities; that’s a good thing! but these seasons, of course, were recorded before that. the game itself has some questionable cultural stuff baked into it, and that is (almost necessarily) going to be brought to the table in a campaign set in a real-world place filled with real-world people of diverse real-world cultures. the cast can have sensitivity consultants and empathy and the best intentions in the world, and they’ll still fuck up from time to time, that’s okay. your mileage may vary on whether or not it’s still worth sticking around with the show (or the fandom) through that. for me, it does not yet outweigh all the things i like about the show, and i’m gonna continue watching it. but it’s still very worth acknowledging that the cast is 7 people who cannot possibly hope to authentically or gracefully represent every culture in nyc. it’s an unfortunate limitation of the medium. yet it’s also still worthwhile to acknowledge and discuss the cultural representation as it is in the show -- both the goods and the bads, the ethically solid and the questionably appropriative -- and even to hold the creators accountable. (decently, though. i’m definitely not advocating anybody cyberbully brennan on twitter or whatever.) the show and its representation is far from perfect, but i also don’t think it ever could be. still, though, it could always be better, and there’s a worthwhile discussion to be had in the wheres, hows, and whys of that.

[frostops]

deltarune chapter 2 weird route is uh... i have thoughts

so in the normal route Noelle tells Susie she likes scary things because it reminds her of watching horror movies with her sister and how she doesnt think scary necessarily means bad. And its supposed to show why she has a crush on Susie. Susie, like horror movies, is scary, but ultimately harmless. Her attempts at being evil with Lancer in chapter 1 were annoying at their worst, and just Susie and Lancer joking around the rest of the time. And like how Noelle realized that the horror movies brought her and her sister closer, making them a good thing despite being scary, Susie is very protective  of those she cares about once she lets down her walls.

In the weird route however, Noelle, after everyone is back in the light world, talks about how the voice that didnt sound like Kris (the player) was terrifying, and when you make Kris tell her the dark world is real, she once again states that they sounds terrifying. Earlier in the route, she tries to justify to herself what you, as Kris, are doing to her because its making her “stronger.” She tried to view the way Kris is acting as like the horror movies with her sister. Scary, but good. She tries to make that scary feeling go away like she did with the horror movies, but she cant do that.

Chapter 1 starts with the player being told no one can choose who they are in this world, and part of that theme is explored primarily through Kris and the player. We have the character we make discarded and are forced to play as Kris, and Kris has no choice but to go along with what we make them do.

Chapter 2 explores that through Noelle and Queen. Queen attempts to force her will onto Noelle, under the belief that it will make her happier. But, its only after she reconnects with Kris and spends time with Susie that she is able to stand up to Queen, which also makes Queen realize she was wrong. Queen was trying to choose who Noelle was for her. In the light world, we learn from Rudy that Noelle’s mother is acting similarly, which is why he asks Kris and Susie to be there for Noelle.

In the Weird route, we, the player, are the one trying to force their will onto Noelle. We are the one choosing who she becomes. We help her get “stronger” at the expense of her not being fully aware of what she’s doing, blacking out when she freezes the salesman and the puzzles. She tries to convince herself that listening to Kris (the player) is making her more capable. We dont give her explanations, just commands and threats. She is so reliant on our will that even during the Spamton Neo fight, where Susie and Ralsei both dont come to our help after being called for twice each, Noelle freezes Spamton after we call for her once.

The player abuses Noelle in the Weird route. Thats why its so much more uncomfortable than Undertale’s genocide route. Frisk traveled alone in Undertale, but Kris is almost always accompanied by someone else. This allows for more personal stories, but that also means the stories where the player chooses cruelty will also be more personal. You cant have a genocide route like in Undertale without an explanation for why Kris’s companions go along with that. If your allies are already comfortable with mass murder, the player wont feel as much responsibility for that murder. But if the player chooses to manipulate someone into doing that murder for them, there’s no way to separate themselves from what happened.