#that's not to say that lucifer never loved him

[temis-de-leon]

Look at you, looking at me

Characters: Lucifer x gn!reader

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Prompts used: Requited unrequited love + first date + stuck in close proximity

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“Do I want to ask?”

“I’d prefer if you didn’t, actually”

A long sigh followed and all MC could do was hang their head in embarrassment and try their best to avoid the eldest brother’s hard stare. They could still feel its weight in their flesh and their bones, but it was better than looking straight at the Lucifer’s rage and irritation, especially when they were part of the cause.  

Desperate for any type of distraction, they pushed the chair backwards and jumped out of the seat, although both had already explored the small space hours ago and none of them had found anything that could help in their escape.

The simulation had placed them in a study room, similar to those in libraries or colleges, with windows where the sunlight passed right through and a simple lockless door that they had been unable to open since the moment they got there. People could be heard walking by, but they spoke gibberish and didn’t seem to hear MC’s pleas or the demon’s threats and curses. In summary, the door wouldn’t break, the bookshelves didn’t have any hidden doors behind and the windows only had views of the sky; which meant that, even if they managed to open them, they would still have to jump straight into nothingness.

By all means, they were trapped together.

Unfortunately, MC knew perfectly well what needed to be done to get out.

“Am I to understand that you have a part in this, then?”

“I will neither confirm nor deny that statement”

He fixed his eyes on them once again; they could tell by the way the room turned colder and their muscles stiffened. However, MC was unable to turn around and act normal, let alone lie and tell him to not worry about the situation.

“All I’m saying is that maybe we should keep looking for a way out” they insisted, bending down to inspect the spot at the door where the lock would be. “What if the answer has been staring at us all along?”

“We would’ve seen it already by now if that were the case” Lucifer said as he got up, walking towards them with a lazy stride. The drag of his shoes over the tiled floor gave MC goosebumps, but it was the low tone of his voice what anchored them to the ground. Unable to move and feeling ridiculous wearing the stereotypical Japanese high school uniform, MC did nothing as the Avatar of Pride crossed the small room in a few short steps and stopped right behind them. The warmth of his breath prickled their skin when he talked. “Whatever are you hiding, MC?”

“Hiding? Me?”

“I advise you to choose your next words carefully”

There was a slight edge to his words, but they knew he’d never truly hurt them. As threatening and scary as he could get, MC was completely sure they could trust him with their life. Now, at least. Those times when their heartbeat quickened out of fear and apprehension at the sight of him were long gone, although their heart still beat faster in his presence; just for completely different reasons.

It hadn’t been a sudden change but it felt like so for MC. One day they were tiptoeing around the house trying their best to avoid the door to Lucifer’s office and the next they were staring at themselves in the mirror for hours while carefully choosing an outfit for the day. Like a lovesick teenager, they blushed, stopped thinking and stammered with their own words, melting under the red hue of his gaze and jumping at the slightest of touches. Being around him in tight spaces was pure torture.

Lucifer, on his part, remained the same as always. Always unfazed, if not a bit more prone to teasing.

Digesting his uninterested expressions would be easier if their meaning wasn’t so brutal.

“Well” they started, coughing to ease the dryness in their throat. Lucifer placed a hand on their back and patted lightly, or at least tried to, because that only made MC jump again and get away unceremoniously. “We’re in Levi’s new game, obviously”

“Obviously” he repeated, sounding oddly plain.

“It’s not an escape room, since it’s not giving us any clues… It could have a narrative, but we haven’t seen any of that either. An RPG, point and click… but we don’t have a mouse to click with... do we click with our fingers?”

“MC”

“I mean, it could be an RPG, since we’re dressed as students…”

“MC”

“What do you think we need to do? Pass a test?”

“MC”

A deadly tone. One last chance to come clean.

What were they trying anyway? They knew what had to be done and he knew they knew. The only reason they were still in the simulation was because MC was too weak to accept reality.

Holding a breath, they turned around and briefly looked at Lucifer’s enraged gaze. Part of them expected him to be frowning or even in his demon form, but that wasn’t the case. On the contrary, he was smiling; eyes half closed as he studied MC with sickening interest and a twisted smirk. Somehow, he still carried an overwhelming presence, even with the juvenile clothes and the warmth of the fake sun right behind him, and MC became silent in embarrassment when they realized that, not only they weren’t scared, they were titillated.

“The truth, now. If you please”

It was obvious by the last addition that it wasn’t a suggestion.

Defeated, MC threw their arms in the air and laughed with nervousness as every little piece of control they could’ve had over the situation slipped away. Lucifer’s features relaxed ever so slightly.

“They heard I wanted to take you out for breakfast!”

Which sounded ridiculous.

MC meant the brothers, of course. Who else would spy on them without remorse? What had started as a private confession practice in their room had ended in a family reunion minus the eldest plus Solomon (Why not? Why wouldn’t the sorcerer be there?). For hours they had all listened to their ramblings with eager smiles, like pure sociopaths, probably thinking of ways of screwing Lucifer over instead of trying to help their dear friend get with their brother. By the end of the night, only Asmo and Levi had shown genuine interest in MC’s love life.

And look how it ended.

There was still sunlight in the study room, but MC felt no heat when they placed a hand under the rays, and while they were both silent, the voices outside didn’t sound louder. It was all fake and steady and would remain so until MC decided a change was due.

“You wanted to take me out?” Lucifer said in an indecipherable tone, although he sounded calm. “May I ask for what purpose?”

If there was a moment to open their heart, that would be it.

I’m in love with you and I thought a public setting would help me stay cool.

I can’t keep living with you acting like you don’t matter to me.

Looking at you makes my heart hurt.

Which would be the best?

Back at the desk, the cootie catcher stared right at them, colourful fold wide open to show the letters that had started the whole thing.

TELL HIM <3

“It was an appreciation gift” they eventually murmured, still reticent to let it all out. “For being a good friend”

Behind them, Lucifer hummed in acknowledgement. It sounded as if he was calling them a liar, although that might’ve been because MC felt like one.

“I didn’t want it to get so out of proportion… I’m sorry”

He hummed again before chuckling.

“Leave it to my idiotic brothers to make any course of action unbearable”

His words eased the tension in the room, but MC didn’t feel any better. There was still a tight knot in their stomach and a wave of nausea rushing to take control of their body.

“I do not get what that has to do with Levi’s game, though…”

“It’s a dating simulator” they interrupted him with a heated face.

Unable to stay calm anymore and keep the charade much longer, MC finally let themselves fall on the wooden chair and look at him with great embarrassment. The surprise on his face was noticeable, but it was partially covered by his familiar alluring smile. The mixed expressions made their blood tingle with excitement.

“And I understand we haven’t increased our intimacy points; am I correct?”

His stride was composed, sure on its way to MC until their shoes were touching and it had to stop. The warmth emanating from him was welcoming and it kept them anchored to the uncomfortably hard chair. He was amused, they could tell, but there was no ill intent; behind the sadistic tilt in his smile, MC could see a childish eagerness and a faint blush.

Slowly, his naked hand left his hip to trace the curves of their jaw, red fingernails softly scratching the skin before cupping their whole face with gentleness.

The whole simulation could’ve crushed and MC would’ve been none the wiser.

Not that they cared.

“I accept your invitation” he ended up saying, voice low enough to reach the depths of MC’s heart and alter its rhythm. He frowned for a moment. “Not as a friend, though”

His fingers traced the shape of their lips, touch slowing down as he leaned over them.

“I would never love you as a friend”

.

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Taglist: @ilovecandys2010 @ollieoven @kingofspadesdelusion @whimsybloom

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Okay but consider this...

Lillith did not, in fact, order Alastor to go to the hotel or protect Charlie (per say)

In fact, she might have slapped the exact opposite order on the deer, because she knew what a nightmare he could be.

It would be inifinitely more fun to have her reveal that when she drops in for a visit.

"So you sent Alastor here to protect me?"

"My dear, I told him explicitly not to fucking come here in order to protect you. But he's a wilful bastard and I should have known better." Lillith sighed, rubbing her eyes.

"So why did you come here?"

"Why, pure spite and a desire for entertainment my dear. Why not?"

"...if that's true, why didn't you ask for my soul in our deal? I... would hope my mother would trade it for your own."

"She may have, she may not have. She could just force me to release it to her too, you know that's in her power."

"That didn't answer my question..."

Lillith laughs, "Darling, I think you actually endeared yourself to the Overlord when you fought that horrid mantis woman on television. He genuinely enjoys that level of chaos... and the fact he remained against my many subtle attempts to have him leave, means perhaps the stubborn deer might actually like you."

"Preposterous, it's mere entertainment..."

"Like Rosie? Like Vox? Are they entertainment? You let her hug you and didn't even try to bite Charlie once. Oh don't get steamed, deer, I'm just yanking your tail... it's not a bad thing to care for someone. And my-... Our darling daughter..." here she winked, having scryed the initial song battle between Alastor and Lucifer, grinning widely. The two were so similar when it came to theatricality, and yet, so different in terms of everything else. "here is just the sort of creature that no one but the bleakest of fools could fail to care for."

"...how dare you imply I have any emotions, you wretched diva." The tone was mock offence and joviality, and only Lillith's echoing laughter stopped Lucifer from defending her majesty's honour.

"Oh, you do, and I'm sure you're quite fawn'd of Charlotte, you antagonistic anachronistic ancient artifact." She bounces back, airily.

"Ho, I know one should never ask a lady her age, but I don't think there's a number high enough for you to provide in answer."

"I missed these little banter sessions, Bambi, it got quite boring without someone mocking my every waking moment."

"And your husband is a poor substitute for your cruel wit, Siren, and yet... we made do with what we had. Now, how are you here? I thought Adam's little nonsense kept you pinned in place?"

"I believe Niffty took the pest out on my behalf and snapped the threads binding me there. Do get her something pretty from Rosie's and put it on my account, I know the demonic doll will adore anything from her boutique."

"Hello, can I get a word in edgewise?" Lucifer has this too-cheerful grin on his face, waving his hand like an eager student aiming for the attention of the teacher. "Hi, your husband, hello. Quick question, what the fuck are you talking about? How do you know the bellhop? How is Adam involved in any of this? And again, what the FUCK is going on here?"

"Oh... did I not say, my love?" Lillith coos, a trembling note that she knew angels used between one another to help settle ffrazzled nerves. It was always a delightful amusement to see Lucifer's ruffled feathers settle. Intriguingly, the little ex-orcist does to, and then looks confused about it. "Why, I was trapped in Heaven with my boorish first fool of a 'husband', to prevent more 'rebellion nonsense'. I had to make a rather clever deal to help Alastor get back to Hell, and I technically own his soul... but we've been friends for decades, dear. You've met twice..."

Ah, that might be why Alucard was so pissed to be dismissed, Lucifer realises. Wouldn't be the first time he'd forgotten a face.

"Charlie was abooooout ten at the time, in terms of age, my dove..." Lillith prompts. "The television sinner was there too? Do you recall that?"

"...no. But a lot of those decades were a foggy mess." Lucifer admits, trying to work out how he forgot a guy with a tv for a head. Wait, he remembered the guy with a tv for a head. "Did the television have a yellow sweater on and I kept subtly asking how the fuck he managed to get it on given the neckhole didn't seem that stretchy?"

Audience applause played from the air. "That's the one. The secret was, of course, velcro down the back. He'll say he used his powers to put it on, but he didn't have that ability back then." Alastor explains. "I do believe it was a vaguely productive meeting, even if you were only physically present, your Lowness. Why, I recall we'd taught deer Charlotte at least four new swear words by the time we left..."

Charlie, whose eyes were wide as she Recalled Something, felt her mouth fall open. "Oooooh, so you're the ones who taught me to say [very long and complicated series of words that seem to be sending Lucifer into a state of rage as yet unattainable to sinners with every syllable]... right? I said that to dad when he told me it was bathtime and I didn't want to, and he had to go set something on fire before he came back to talk about 'good words and bad words'."

Vaggie looked horrified, and snapped a glare at the radio demon.

Alastor's grin was WIDER than it should be possible to get. "Are you telling me, my dear Charlotte, was that his Majesty's tantrum was the reason that half of pentagram city was burned to the ground shortly after we left that day? Oho, that's just... delicious."

"Well I shouldn't have said it..." Charlie agonised, "I'm sorry Dad. I mean, it was a while ago,but..."

"Oh, you're not to blame Char-Char... this fucker is." Lucifer launches for Alastor, whose tendrils are manifesting... and then a startled bleat escapes as Lillith yanks him practically into her lap by the collar.

"Hold, Luci, there was no harm done in the long run. And you know I found it hilarious, in the aftermath." Lillith waves it off. She turns to the Overlord trying to right himself. "And you, you terrible influence, I do hope you haven't taught our darling anything worse while I was away?"

Charlie, caught back on the bleat sound, is watching on with stars in her eyes. She blinks. "What? No, he hasn't... well, unless you count [a strange warbling static came out of her mouth as her lips moved in what seemed like words]?"

Alastor's ears went flat in shock. "I promise you I didn't teach her that... I had no idea she could even hear that frequency, nuch less verbalise it!"

"I heard you tell Vox he should-..."

"DO NOT REPEAT THAT!" Alastor just about begged as static spilled about the room. "Do you WANT your parents to reduce me to atoms?"

Charlie blinked. "No? It was a pretty creative threat, but it wasn't that bad..."

Lucifer was pulling at a mental thread from the conversation. "Hold on, can we back up to the part where the deer was in Heaven...? How did that happen?"

Angry static filled the room until it was oppressive. Vaggie clutched at Charlie's arm whilst also putting herself between Charlie and the Overlord.

"Enough of that..." Lillith murmured and tugged at an antler. She received an indignant noise that Alastor wouldn't ever admit to with a gun to his head. "They were going to find out eventually you overdramatic cervine... might as well out with it."

The ears pinned flat. "No."

"Fine, I will... this canibalistic mass-murdering psychopath somehow got accidentally redeemed whilst fending off angels during an extermination. I strongly suspect it was because, even though they had just been fighting to the death, he still put himself in the way of those who would have killed Vox..."

Charlie was flickering between shock, anger, confusion and something that looked like it wanted to be weepy and affectionate. Hopefully she didn't settle for the latter because Lillith and Lucifer would have to pin the deer in place to avoid Alastor throwing himself out a window to avoid the whole mess.

"You... you knew it was possible... and you didn't TELL ME?!" Charlie yelled, settling on Anger.

Alastor grins, "Well, you never directly asked, did you?"

Charlie steamed, then pivoted in the old Charlie Fashion (TM) to joyful. "It's possible?!"

Lillith also adds, "From what I have heard around Heaven, it may not have been the first time... they just keep it quiet. And... well, if someone gets up there who starts doing things like, say, eating Cherubs because they were furious they were trapped there... they usually just killed them off. Unless, of course, they had the Queen of Hell there who could convince them to try another way."

"You ate CHERUBS?! They're like CHILDREN?" Lucifer is aghast.

"They are infuriatingly too-positive little nightmares with no common sense or ability to accept anyone else's viewpoint. Yes. they were delicious."

"...well, okay they're a bit of an experience but eating them?!"

"Most of them are centuries older than myself, they had enough time to learn to back off. I warned them, they persisted, I got to try angelic veal..."

Vaggie looked like she wanted to throw up. "Don't. ever. say that phrase again."

"What, angelic ve-...?"

"You stop taunting my future daughter in law or I order you to let them pet your tail." Lillith warns. It's an empty threat, she was a major proponent of bodily autonomy (anyone who'd been trapped with Adam would be) but Alastor didn't need to know that.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"I would. Now, shall I continue? Lovely. We made a deal, with Adam cosigning because I was under his contract, to allow Alastor to return to Hell as a Sinner... with a few rules that the oaf created. Particularly the one around not raising an army against Heaven, and some poorly worded nonsense about not sharing the secrets of angelic steel and implying he should not be 'fucked with' which we took to assume meant no fighting the fool. Because he certainly made passes at both of us."

Lillith's mouth turned down in distaste. Alastor looked like HE was going to be sick.

Lucifer's expression flickered demonic. "If he wasn't dead, I'd kill him again..." After everything Lillith went through in the Garden, to be trapped with a man who could never learn from his mistakes, was blind to making them. Revolting.

"Didn't want to take the Dickmaster for a spin, Bambi?" he snipes, distracting himself with the casual patter of argumentation with the overlord.

"Why, your majesty, I was busy with your wife... although comparatively, I do have good time management skills, I suppose I COULD have managed if I tried..."

"You did WHAT?!"

Lillith was trying so hard to keep a straight face as she threw a pseudo seductive expression at Alastor. "Oh darling, he's not ready to know about that..." she purrs. She sees her husband attain an almost orange colouring. "We're joking, dear... I promise."

"Dad? Try counting to te-... fifty-seven." Charlie intervenes.

"One, two-... wait, why 57?" he says, colour settling again.

"Because the number was so unusual you'd get curious about it and drop out of your funk to ask."

"...you really are so clever, Char-Char, we really made something amazing when we created you."

"Daaaaaaaaaaad, please... not in front of Vaggie." she flushes.

"Unclench, your Lowness, your wife is aesthetically pleasing but we are but friends." Alastor shrugged.

"Because you liked Vox, right?" Lucifer was awarding himself a mental medal because he REMEMBERED bits of the conversation. Wasn't that sad?

Alastor snarled. "Hardly." Oooh, that seemed like a sore spot. Time to press.

"Didn't like you back, huh? Fair. I can't fucking stand you, and-..."

"Lucifer, leave it." Lillith said. It wasn't harsh or sharp, but it conveyed that she knew something about why the Overlord's expression had fallen behind that smile, even as he forced whatever emotion that meant back into a box and reasserted the mask. "It's complicated, and now is not the time for that conversation. Suffice to say, no one slept with Adam outside of his exorcists, but I did manage to get Alastor back to Hell as swiftly as I could in order to have him covertly assisting Charlie."

"How? If you wouldn't let him at the hotel, then how does that help?"

"Destabilise the Overlords, be more lenient about the souls on his chains trying out the hotel, spread information about the place in a covert manner that wouldn't get a target on you, so many underhanded things my dear. Though, I am glad he disobeyed... I hadn't realised how little you understood of management and staffing."

"Heh, yeah... it was the best we had."

"Charlotte, you could have ordered palace staff to come and help at the hotel, you were always too kind."

"Oh, I dismissed them when you left with Charlie..." Lucifer adds, sheepishly.

"It seems there is a lot I need to do in the interim, then." Lillith sighed. "Alastor, would you be open to helping me manage these tasks, even without the deal in place?"

"...I kept the last hotel together with magical duct tape and elbow grease, it's a matter of pride now to continue in the role." Alastor shrugs, as if unconcerned. The collar shatters with a snap of elegant pale fingers. "Thank you... now, what was it you needed seen to? I will need to schedule in a few hours to go and tear the Vees limb from limb, but outside of that, my calendar's quite open."

"Wait, we need to discuss everything we just learned! I have questions!"

"Later, Charlotte. Now is the time for action..." Alastor replies, radio dial eyes flaring, already planning on how he would prepare the Vees for dinner.

"How dare you talk to our daughter that way, Alastor, deer?" Lillith teases, tugging at his ear and laughing as he snaps his teeth at her fingers. "Oh, don't fight in front of Charlotte, she'll end up with a complex or something..."

"On top of her glaring daddy issues you mean?"

Alastor doesn't like the way Lucifer's expression goes from furious to cold, cruel delight in a heartbeat. "Well, it's on you to fix now as well, bellhop... seeing as you claimed her too. So, how about some..." the world seemed o slow down like a horror movie, "Family... therapy...?"

"...If you'll excuse me, I'm going to beg Vox to kill me."

Charlie leaps for him, "No, he's kidding!"

"So am I, Charlotte... do take a breath. Your parents are apparently comedians this afternoon, and I think we'd all best steer clear of them until whatever madness has swept over them, passes. Now, would you like to come and watch me dismember an overlord? You and Vagathat could even tag-team Velvette if you wished..."

Vaggie looks like she might pass out.

His ears flatten. "Ah, I believe I hit another slang term and I'm not going to like what it really means... am I?"

Lucifer curls half his wings around the Overlord, as one might companionably sling an arm over their shoulder if they were at comparable heights. Clearly having decided that he can torment the other better if he REALLY leans into this madness between them all.

He steers the deer towards the corridor as Lillith follows behind, unwilling to miss the fuss.

"Well, you're gonna love this, Al... husbando nuero uno, honey, deerly beloved, blood moon of our life..." Laying it on thick, but Al looked ready to claw his own ears off with each passing endearment. "...but tag-teaming used to mean fighting in tandem, and now it means-..."

The door clicks shut, but seconds later every radio in the c=vinciity blasts an air raid siren and something that sounds mysteriously like a clown falling down the stairs.

Charlie counts to ten, breathing hard.

"What the fuck is my life...?" she whispers.

Vaggie consoles her as best she can, tossing up if Charlie outweighed the insanity of her family enough to propose. She blanches, momentarily, imagining having to ask Lucifer and Lillith and Alastor's permission, before catching herself.

Sure just the first two, right?

Right?

But then she recalled the look in the royal couple's eye, and their infamous penchant for committing to the bit... and resigned herself to like, dragging a sinner home and offering it to the deer for his blessing. Or something insane like that.

"No matter what, I love you, Charlie..." she murmurs externally. "Let's go take a walk in the garden to calm down, okay?"

"...yeah, I could use fresh air after all this."

There'd be so much to talk about later, so much to ask... but for now?

Charlie needed cuddles and connection.

And, based on the sounds downstairs, someone needed a first aid kit or a priest... so they'd be taken the back staircase to avoid all that. The smoke alarms began to blare.

Vaggie tugged Charlie away from the choas just a little faster.

----------

no idea where this was going, it spiralled on me

it could be funny tho

[iamlostsomewhereinthegarden]

Took me a while because I literally did everyone lol, so here we have:

Obey me characters and their fashion styles Pt. 2

Holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shi- This is part 2 as there is the stupid 3 gifs/images per post limit

Pt 1.

Solomon

Only has one proper fit in his closet that he put together everything else was bought and put together for him by Asmo

Has little interest in fashion and with the years blurring by in his human mind has lost track of what is actually fashionable so can't really dress properly outside of suit and tie events since there isn't much variations in that

Always in something that covers his body because he dislikes showing off his pact marks and whatever scars he has on his body

Despite this all his clothes are breathable and doesn't overheat him, he overheats often very easily and just uses magic to seem unbothered but he wears breathable clothing to avoid one more chore

Let him dress you and you'll come out looking like a damned hot mess never let him actually dress you, let him put in opinions and give out ideas but never let him actually dress you!

Diavolo

On par with Lucifer with the fact that he can only dress formally properly as he's been having to do it forever

His difference is that casual clothing (on the rare occasions that is) is a mix of Lucifer's casual and Solomon's fashion sense because he doesn't get to dress casual often and refuses to let Barbatos find something suitable for him to wear

Really likes themed clothing though and will try and force Lucifer or even push Barbatos to wear matching clothing with him Mephibfrebchd wishes he could be like that with Diavolo

Compared to Solomon though Diavolo is more on the cringe leaning side and will gladly look like a pair of dads with Lucifer and wear Hawaiian shirts with khakis

Even with his bad fashion sense it's hard to make fun of him or even tell him it sucks because what do you mean you're gonna bully someone who rarely ever gets the freedom to be chill and choose his own stuff and rarely gets a chance to wear these crappy casual clothing? WHAT DO YOU MEAN??????

Let him dress you and you'll come out wearing some matching cringe shit with him, yes it's gonna be embarrassing but on the bright side not only did the King of Hell dress you but you're matching with him! Anyone who makes fun of you is also making fun of the king so they better get ready to grovel for forgiveness

Barbatos

The king of formal wear

Despite this he does know how to dress casual and for any event and how to not look weird either

He has to as he dresses Diavolo and has been taking care of him from since forever

He's just simply one hell of a butler

His no specific style outside of not really being fond of clothing that may show his body

Let him dress you and you'll come out looking in the most ideal way of your style, he's a butler that caters to other's needs so he knows how to dress people to their tastes!

Though if you let him dress you how'd he like you to look you'll come out looking like a royal or a noble as  that is what you are to him

Simeon

(Btw why does he dress like a slut)

Has a very casual sense of style tbh, not too formal but not too cozy and lazy, the perfect middle

Though I'd have to say most of his clothes has no sleeves, he has a weird problem with sleeves on his clothing though he will wear them to be appropriate.

Enjoys the fact that heaven gives them stuff to wear cause he actually dislikes finding outfits

Despite this the king of casual comfy clothing like the first fit you try you love immediately 

Let him dress you and you'll come out in an outfit that you'll often wear cause it's so good

Luke

I feel like dressing with him would be like dress up time with a child

Doesn't know much about fashion since that is not something to be focused on in Heaven and I'm pretty sure they restricted for what they can wear

Has the innate ability to pick out very cute looking clothing though it may not always be comfortable sadly

Dresses in the cute shota fashion, think like Mitsukuni Haninozuka from Ouran Host Club

Is fine dressing in any color but likes dressing in pastel colors the most outside of any shade of blue and yellow

Let him dress you and you'll come out looking adorable! like so cute, very cute and probably matching with him.

Raphael

(Why is he dressed even sluttier????? WHY IS ASMO MORE DRESSED THAN BOTH OF THE ADULT ANGELS 90 OF THE TIME??? IS HEAVEN A STRIP CLUB????????)

If we think Solomon was bad Raphael is 10x worse because at least Solomon has an idea of what he thinks is cool and what is fashionable even if it sucks Raphael has no idea or care

All outfits chosen by himself is weird and uncoordinated or similar to his regular fit so almost everything for the world to see

Constantly manages to find the most comfortable clothes you can possibly find also, so though he looks weird he's comfy

Actually prefers to have as much skin out as possible as it makes it easier for him to move around and fight if needed

Hates clothing that fully covers his skin and it makes him feel stifled, prefers stuff that isn't close to his skin (he just like me fr)

Let him dress you and you'll come out looking veryyyyyy funky but very mobile and somehow very comfortable, demons stare at you and tell you that "you have a unique sense of fashion" and you have to let them know that you let the "Angel with the Spear dressed you today" and suddenly they understand and are sorry for you

Thirteen

Thirteen is an amazing fashionista and has an amazing sense of style

I'm sure you can tell by her personalized reaper uniform and R.A.D. uniform but she loves alt styles 

All her clothing is different and ranges from comfortable to non comfortable but most are comfortable because it's supposed to be something she likes

Also doesn't care much for how much of her body is exposed but prefers to always carry some sort of sweater she likes her arms covered but doesn't always care for sleeves or long gloves (she's just like me fr)

Go to a thrift shop with her and she'll find the coolest and comfiest stuff to wear

Let her dress you and you'll come out looking so fucking cool, you'll look like those people on magazines or that cool alt person you see that you add to your pinterest board

Mephihdewuhcds Mephistopheles

On the same level of dressing as Lucifer and Diavolo (simp) but when asked to dress down dresses like a prep kid

The brands on this man radiates so much money that Mammon's mouth waters and you look like a walking cash bag to him

Most of his clothing is very uncomfortable but he's just gotten used to it (I personally believe he comes from a shitty noble family hence why he's so stuck up) so comfy clothing is foreign and weird to him

Does not know how to dress casual (even in rich branded clothing) as the average person may see it, and is very uncomfortable in casual clothing because of his upbringing

Let him dress you and you'll come out looking similar to how Satan would dress you, a prep student that aces all their exams! (though the clothes may be a bit uncomfortable)

Tags:@kisakis-boyfriend

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Adam: You're welcome!! You've always been kinda fuckable.

Yeah, he's gonna pull a reverse Jesus and turn that wine into water. Lucifer snapped his fingers and Adam only had water now.

Lucifer: Are you okay? Do you need a minute?

Adam: Nooo!! I'm fine little man, look at you! That chair is too fucking tall for you, kicking your feet you're sooo cute!

Lucifer flushed: You are so wasted.

Adam: Naaaah, I'm good! Come here!

Lucifer: Wha- Oh! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Adam pulled his seat over and just started fucking tickling him and even though Lucifer could use his magic to get away but he didn't.

Lucifer: A-Adam!! STOP THAT TICKLES!!!!

Adam: That's the point!!

Lucifer was laughing so hard he was crying, tears streaming down his face, his lungs burned from a lack of oxygen. Lucifer squeaked when Adam picked him up and held him to his chest.

Lucifer: A-Adam?

Adam: I missed this......... I missed you...... My angel ........

Definitely very drunk.

Lucifer gripped his shirt: I.... I missed you too.

He used his magic to turn the microphones off, he didn't want Adam to say something, more something that he might regret saying over the air.

Adam: D-did you ever love me?

Oh father above, he was so glad the microphones were off. He looked up to Adams shining golden eyes, they looked wet.

Lucifer: Ad-

Adam: Because I loved you.

Lucifer sighed, this wasn't what he thought tonight would be.

Lucifer: Y-yes........ Maybe you should go to bed.

He helped Adam the best he could get to his room to lay down, Adam never let him go as if he was going to fly away.

He jumped when Adam kissed his forehead and held him so close.

Adam: Luci?

Lucifers heart clenched at the old nickname: Yeah Ad?

Adam: Are the microphones off?

Lucifer: Yes?

Adam: Good, I lied his show fucking sucks........ And so does jazz.

Lucifer snickered, that's the Adam he knows.

Lucifer: I know Addie, I know.

The Hotel Yard

Adam: So, Lucifer hadn't heard this yet but there is an AI version of our show already.

Lucifer: Shit, okay.

AI Lucifer: Hello everyone I'm with my co-host Adam. And might I say you look like you've escaped from a mental institution.

Adam: So already you start off with insulting me

Lucifer: Yeah but we take turns

Adam: Giving blows to each other

Lucifer: Yeah we take turns blowing each other.

Adam: HAHAHA!!

AI Adam: That's not nice Lu

AI Lucifer: No, but you want to know something else? We're gay for each other.

Lucifer: What!? Hahaha!

Adam: Fucking Jesus hahaha!

I love these goobers so much 😂

AI Adam: We love recording this podcast. But our fathers hate us.

Lucifer and Adam nearly die if laughing.

Lucifer: W-What the fuck?!

Adam: It's not fucking wrong, dude!

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Lustful Wedding

Inspired by @cakerybakery Fake Dating/Sex Pollen

-

No one goes to a wedding without a date. Not unless you're a child, someone desperate to find a hookup, or just a pathetic loser who can't get a date.

And Lucifer didn't want to be that loser. It was sad that he had no one to go with to Ozzie and Fizz's wedding but he didn't want to go alone.

But that's when he got the brainwave to ask Adam. Worst he can say is no.

Adam: A wedding?

Lucifer: Yeah, Ozzie the Sin of Lust is getting married and I was wondering if you would be my date.

Adam blinked and flushed a litte: Like a real date?

Lucifer: W-what? No, more like a fake date. Just so I'm not there alone.

Adam thought for a moment: What do I get out of this?

Lucifer brightened: As much of the wedding food as you can eat and a full 24 hours of not being in the hotel. You just have to be nice.

Adam: Sold.

That was easy, Lucifer thought he'd want more. But then again Adam had always been a simple man.

So they came up with the story of how they "got together". They would tell people, when asked that they started dating after having a romantic lunch together in Lucifer's garden.

Adam said that sounded very fucking gay and Lucifer argued that it didn't matter because it didn't happen.

The day of the wedding came, Lucifer and Adam were dressed up in nice suits. Adam could appreciate the colors of Lust, everything down here seemed amazing. And the dick ice sculpture was a nice touch in his opinion.

For being the Sin of Lust, Ozzie and Fizz's vows were beautiful, heartfelt, and full of love. With some raunchy lustful intentions thrown in of course.

At the reception, everyone was curious as to who the King of Hells new boyfriend was, so they quickly told them their story and people bought it like they do Ozzie's dildos.

Adam enjoyed all the food, he also played with some of it since a lot was dick and mouth shaped.

Adam: This is actually a great fucking wedding.

Lucifer: Yeah, I'm happy for Ozzie.

He did notice however, that some people were leaving early. Which was odd you'd think they would stay to the end.

Ozzie grabbed a microphone: Thank you all for coming to our wedding. Now comes the best and most thrilling part of a lust fueled wedding. The sex pollen induced orgy!

Adam nearly choked on his champagne: What!?

Lucifer: Oh no.....

Adam: Why didn't you tell me!?

Lucifer: I didn't know!

Sex Pollen can last for hours.

The golden powder was released into the air and floated down to all the party goers.

Adam: Run?

Lucifer: Run.

They ran for the door and tried to get out as fast as they could, only to end up getting covered in a thin layer of the pollen.

The warming feeling that crawled under their skin making them hot, blood flowed to their dicks making them in need of a release as they strained in their pants.

Adam: Fuuuuck

Lucifer frantically looked around and pulled Adam into a nearby supply closet, they weren't doing this in the damn hallway.

Overcome with lust, Adam and Lucifer locked eyes and knew what they had to do. Lucifer pulled Adam down into a kiss of tongue and teeth as they frantically ripped and shoved each other's clothes off and out of the way.

They moaned, their skin too hot and they need to feel better but kissing just wasn't enough.

Adam didn't know when he lost his pants, he didn't give a shit, his hands braced the wall as Lucifer fingered him open with his own spit.

Adam: Ahhh! Fuck! Get on with it!!

He has never been this fucking horny and needy in his entire fucking life. And to think they only got a little of that stuff on them.

Lucifer spit on his hand to slick his dick up, he needs this so fuckong badly it's going on 8 years since he's had sex.

He gripped Adam's hips firmly and plunged into him, fuck that felt a little better being in his tight warm heat. He didn't give him much time to adjust, the need to move was too great.

Adam: Ahh! Fucking fuck me!! ~

Lucifer: Shit!

He did what felt good and right, moving so fast and hard Lucifer couldn't dwell on how he was even moving like that.

Lucifer: Sooo, fucking good!!~

Adam: Ahhh!! YES!! FUCK YES!! OH FUCK!!~

Adam was screaming his throat raw but he didn't care, he needed that release, that orgasm and he was so close.

Lucifer was so close too and when they came it was a powerful one that made them weak in the knees. They sunk down to the floor together, but the need was still there and they were still hard.

So this time Adam had Lucifer lay down and he rode him like his fucking life depended on it.

Three hours and multiple orgasms later, they were finally spent and laying on the floor of the closet covered in sweat, jizz, and panting breathlessly.

Adam: Holy shit......

Lucifer: Yeah......

They didn't know how long they stayed there like that, but one thing was for certain.

They were SO raiding the buffet after this.

[koukouture]

Script for a comic I don't think I'll ever make LMAO

Context: This is sort of Emet Selch's monologue about Azem during Shadowbringers. Yeah. That's all you need to know.

"You don't know me at all. So shut up" that's what you said.

You were dying. I could see it- the light infecting you, seeping into your head, heart and very soul. You were no longer a distant star but a blinding supernova. Hot to the touch, dangerous, dying, faded- but in a way- beautiful.

You always did shine brighter than the rest.

So how dare you say I don't know you?

Know you?

You are my other half; I am nothing without you. You are all I know.

I knew you across thousands of years, across hundreds of incarnations, across a dozen and some worlds.

Know you?

I am you.

Everything that I am now is because of you. All of it! I traveled far and wide and every single time I cannot stray from your light. Every single road I took went back to you. Every single path, alleyway, staircase every labyrinth- you were at the end of all of them.

Sometimes we are lovers, sometimes we are friends, allies, enemies... sometimes we are strangers.

Do not accuse me of ignorance. I am under no delusion that I know you- I know you better than anyone.

And you know me too.

Don't you?

Azem

Lucifer

You know me... right?

You can feel it surely- this is fate! You know me! I'm your soulmate! Can't you feel it!? Can't you feel me!?

WHY WON'T YOU LOOK AT ME!?

okay i think that's it lolol. bye

[novafloofeatsbirds]

ok last ones for a while i think

[iamsigningmylifeaway]

god forbid we have a horrible murderer woman with the eyes of that painting of lucifer and the disposition of a rabid street dog in an alleyway. god forbid we have one thing.

[quietwingsinthesky]

I feel like much has been made about the fact that, if left unattended, Michael will put Adam on the pedestal God previously occupied and try to love him the same way, which makes things Worse for both of them. And not about Lucifer doing the same thing to Sam.

[samiferboy]

i am not immune to the idea of s1-2 samifer

[libby-for-life]

(Hope you don't mind me adding something—)

Adam felt like giving up, the weight of his unrequited feelings pressing heavily on his chest. Every attempt to get Lucifer to see him as more than just a friend had ended in humiliation, leaving Adam feeling like a fool chasing after an unattainable dream. Each moment spent in Lucifer's radiant presence made his heart race, yet it seemed to pass unnoticed by the one he desired most.

The First Man felt the sting of tears welling up in his eyes, but he clenched his jaw, forcing himself to swallow the emotion. Men don’t cry, he reminded himself, even as he battled the urge to collapse under the strain of his longing. Yet, every glance exchanged with Lucifer ignited a fierce yearning within him, a desperate hunger that left him both exhilarated and heartbroken. Adam couldn't shake the feeling that with every lingering look and casual touch, he was silently pleading for a love that felt eternally out of reach.

"Adam? What's wrong?" The voice cut through the silence like a knife, and Adam couldn’t help but glare at Lucifer, whose bright eyes were filled with genuine concern. The late afternoon Hell light filtered through the window, casting a warm glow that contrasted with the tension in the air.

"Forget it," Adam snapped, attempting to pull away from the conversation, but a strong, reassuring grip fastened around his wrist, preventing his escape. "Don't care? How can you say that?" Lucifer's voice trembled slightly, his expression a mixture of disbelief and hurt that tugged at something deep inside Adam.

Adam's glare intensified, a storm brewing behind his storm-gray eyes. "You don't care how I want you to. You never will." Each word dripped with frustration, revealing a pain that had been festering for far too long. The atmosphere crackled between them, heavy with unspoken truths and unresolved feelings, leaving an ache that lingered like an unfinished melody.

"How do you want me to? Adam, I don't understand!" Lucifer exclaimed, frustration lacing his voice as he raked a hand through his tousled hair. The hotel room was thick with tension, the air heavy with unspoken emotions. But Adam was done holding back. He had reached the breaking point, his heart pounding as he took a step closer, defiance igniting in his eyes.

“Fuck the consequences,” he thought. He didn’t care if the guests overheard their argument or if Lucifer looked at him with disgust. The risk was worth it. With a deep breath, he shouted, “I WANT YOU TO LOVE ME LIKE I LOVE YOU!” His voice echoed off the walls, charged with raw emotion.

There it was, the truth laid bare between them. Adam braced himself, ready for Lucifer's wrath, anticipating the moment he would be picked up by the scruff of his neck and thrown out into the cold night, banished from this fragile world they had shared. But he couldn’t hold back any longer; he had to take this leap, no matter the cost.

He suddenly felt a hand on his face, bringing him to look at Lucifer. Adam couldn't even see properly because he was crying. "Oh, Adam...why didn't you just tell me?" He gently kissed Adam and he would have collapsed if Lucifer didn't hold him up. Adam blinked the tears away when they broke the kiss, the devil's gaze hot. "Now...enough of all this beating-around-the-bush."

Adam shivered when Lucifer smirked. "So...are you certain you don't have any other symptoms of prostate cancer?" He whispered in Adam's ear. "Because in my professional opinion, I need to have another look..."

Oh...shit.

Adam trying to get Lucifer to have sex with him but Lucifer is obviously at every turn.

-

“I love popsicles. Licking them, how they feel in my mouth, swallowing.” Adam moaned sinfully, “but sticky drool always covers my chin, dribbling down onto my chest.”

Lucifer looks up from his duck, towards Adam. Sees the sticky mess doing exactly as Adam said. A string of saliva from the popsicle to Adam’s open mouth. His face flushed. He chuckled. Poor Adam must be really desperate.

He conjured a damp cloth so Adam could clean up the mess on his face and chest. “Here you go, buddy!” Lucifer’s went back to his duck.

-

Adam lay on top of him. His voice husky and he moaned out. “So sooorry. I tripped.”

He straddled Lucifer’s waist, laying there with Lucifer’s face in Adam’s soft pecs and chest hair.

Lucifer reached up, grasping Adam by the hips. “That’s alright.” His voice was muffled by Adam’s chest. He teleported them so that they were standing, and pulled away. “Accidents happen.” He let go and continued on in his search of Charlie.

-

Adam gasped as he scrolled his phone. “Lucifer!” His voice panicked. “I think I have prostate cancer!”

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. “You’re dead, Adam.”

“The internet says it matches my symptoms.” Adam moved from sitting at his end of the couch to kneeling and clinging to Lucifer’s arm. “Can you check?”

He must be very worried if he wanted Lucifer to check. So he pressed his hand to Adam chest and checked. “You’re all good.”

Pouting Adam sat back down.

Idly, Lucifer’s wondered if maybe Adam was having trouble adjusting to hell. He sure had been clingy lately.

[autism-corner]

.

[theboykingsmichaelsword]

sam winchester is a freak and i say that with only love in my heart like that boy is Deranged and that's not even going into the demonblood shit don't ever let anyone tell you he's normal or well-adjusted

[knightshade26]

Pt.2

The moment the words slipped from Alastor's mouth, the room seemed to shrink. The air turned suffocating, thick with tension and the weight of his admission. You. He had confessed it without thinking, without wanting to. The words had come spilling out, a wave of truth he couldn’t hold back, couldn’t even avoid.

Lucifer’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second, a flicker of surprise before the familiar, cruel smirk slid back into place. He leaned forward, his gaze never leaving Alastor’s face, his posture slow and deliberate. Alastor felt the pressure of Lucifer’s stare like a physical thing, piercing and relentless.

“Well, well,” Lucifer purred, his voice far softer than before, “didn’t expect that,” he mused, almost to himself.

Alastor could feel the cold sweat beading on the back of his neck. He had never felt more exposed in his entire existence. Lucifer’s laughter had always been something he could weather, a part of the game. But this—this was different. This was him standing naked before Lucifer, a truth so raw it made his skin burn.

“I… I didn’t mean to—” Alastor began, but his words caught in his throat. He clenched his jaw tightly, as if willing himself to stop speaking, but his lips betrayed him again. “I never wanted to say it. It’s just—” He sucked in a sharp breath. “I’m not supposed to be… vulnerable. I never wanted to be vulnerable.”

The words tumbled out, each one another piece of the self-image he had worked so long to craft. The ever-smiling Radio Demon, the untouchable, the chaotic, the one who didn’t need anyone. The one who could not—and would not—admit weakness.

Lucifer’s expression softened, a strange tenderness flickering across his face that made Alastor want to tear his eyes away. Lucifer tilted his head, a slight, intrigued smile curling his lips.

“Vulnerable?” Lucifer repeated, his voice now a low hum. “And yet you’ve just told me the most vulnerable thing about you.” His smile deepened, almost fond. “You’ve never wanted to be loved? To feel like you matter, like you belong?”

“I—” Alastor’s breath hitched, his heart slamming in his chest as the words spilled out of him, unstoppable now. “I wanted to be loved, but I’m not… I’m not a fool, Lucifer. I’m not some silly creature who believes that anyone would ever…” His voice faltered as the truth, the agony of it, pressed down on him. “I could never be loved. I’m not capable of it.”

Lucifer took a step forward, his presence now a force Alastor couldn’t avoid. “Ah,” Lucifer said softly, “but you do long for it. And perhaps…” He stepped closer still, voice lowering to a whisper, “perhaps you’ve been denying it for far too long.”

Alastor’s mind raced, the flood of truth washing over him, making him feel naked in a way he had never been. He fought against it, tried to close his mouth, tried to hold the flood of words back—but they kept coming. His control was slipping. Lucifer’s presence was too strong, too all-encompassing.

“No,” Alastor hissed through clenched teeth, his voice raw. “I didn’t want to—don’t make me say it!” His hand shook as he placed it on the chair to steady himself, but the truth didn’t care. It came spilling from him, ripping through his carefully maintained defenses.

“I… I wanted to be loved by you,” he choked out, voice faltering. “But I never thought I’d be… worthy.” His chest tightened with the admission, the weight of it pressing so heavily that it made it hard to breathe. “I thought you’d never care, that I was just a game to you, Lucifer.”

Lucifer’s eyes softened, and for the first time, Alastor saw a flicker of something resembling understanding in them. But before he could process what that meant, he turned sharply and stood up from his seat, his body rigid with panic.

“No,” Alastor growled, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. “I am not doing this. I don’t—I’m not going to—”

He couldn’t finish the sentence. He couldn’t. He had to get out. Now.

In a swift motion, Alastor turned toward the door, his footsteps loud against the floor. The panic clawed at his insides, his heart pounding in his ears, his mind screaming at him to flee from the vulnerability, from the truth Lucifer had pulled from him.

But then Lucifer spoke.

“Leaving so soon?” The words were gentle, but there was no mistaking the weight they carried. “I haven’t had my fun yet, Alastor.”

Alastor paused, his fingers gripping the doorframe with white knuckles, his whole body stiff with tension. He couldn’t run. He couldn’t lie, couldn’t even evade. He had admitted it all. He had shown Lucifer a side of him that was never meant to be seen.

He was too far gone now.

Before he could stop himself, he turned back toward Lucifer, and with a sharp intake of breath, he hissed, “You’re manipulating me. You think you know everything, but you don’t know anything about me, Lucifer.”

Lucifer’s smirk was slow to return, but it was there. It was ever-present, and it sent a shiver of both fear and something darker down Alastor’s spine.

“But I do know this, Alastor,” Lucifer said softly, almost tenderly. “You’re not getting away that easily.”

Alastor froze, his back to the door now, his hands trembling. “I’m leaving.”

Lucifer took a step forward, his tone dropping low, his words a soft purr. “You can leave physically, but the truth is already here, Alastor. And you know what? It’s not just in me anymore. It’s in you, too.”

Alastor’s breath caught in his throat. The words weren’t cruel—they weren’t even teasing. There was something else. Something heavy, and deep, and dangerous.

Before he could answer, Lucifer spoke again, his voice a challenge, “Tell me, Alastor. Do you want to leave?”

Alastor’s heart skipped a beat. His breath hitched. He couldn’t escape the truth now. Not even from himself. He gritted his teeth and spat out, “No. I don’t.”

Lucifer’s smirk softened, just for a moment, and the silence that followed was thick with something Alastor wasn’t sure he could name.

But whatever it was, it was more than just a game now. And Alastor had already lost.

••••

There won't be part 3 really!!! really!! (Self please stop!!)

PROMPT WEEK! PROMPT WEEK!

(I'm opening up some free writing to practice😆 i feel like I'm so rusty lately)

Drop a prompt of RadioApple for me and I'll choose? Strictly no NSFW please! If you have any scenarios you'd like, DROP IT SIS! I'd write it for you😆

PROMPT WEEK Commenting will end Tomorrow at 12~

Lovelots guys!

[keets-writing-corner]

Thinking a LOT about Lucifer in the latest Hazbin episode. Idk what I was expecting but not this??

As I was watching my immediate thought was just "huh... Lucifer is kinda of weird..." but as the episode went on I realized the issue

the dude is off the chain depressed, like he says it as a joke but holy cow it is SO BAD

He's manically just creating rubber ducks cuz his daughter really like it that one time but it's empty, it's never good enough but he keeps doing it, maybe cuz he doesn't know how to pass the time otherwise.

like I get the feeling he HAS better things he SHOULD be doing than making rubber duck after rubber duck. At first I was like, "Bruh why isn't the king of hell doing anything?" aaaaand then it became clear...

The dude is disassociating so bad he can barely hold a conversation let alone remember information. He clearly WANTS to, he wants to be involved with his daughter so bad, he wants to care about the things she's doing so bad, but his depression keeps interfering. It's like he can only hear every other word and he grasps onto the ones he does hear semi-out of context. Like you can see every time he catches something that he hadn't before and he just "well shit I didn't catch that part"

and that's why he reacts so weird when people talk to him. He is struggling so bad to engage with the conversation he's only getting 50% of it

does that look like the face of a man who knows what the hell the conversation is even about??? he is STRUGGLING

like Charlie spent so long telling him about the hotel, and he STILL didn't understand what she wanted. Yeah it comes off as ditzy but literally I've been in that position where your brain just "nope, not doing this right now" and nerfs your conversation comprehension. So as someone who's BEEN in that position, to me it feels exactly like what he's dealing with. He's sorta engaged with the conversation, but only as much as his brain will allow

For example, when I'm dealing with this, this is what someone talking to me feels like this where the crossed out parts are what I missed and bold is what I catch, "Hey! You know I was thinking for dinner we could either make some chicken with rice? But if you don't feel like cooking, pasta is super easy and you love that right? What do you want to do?" you can kinda get that someone is trying to talk to you about dinner, and towards the end you get the impression that they asked something that needs your input so you can decently put 2 and 2 together and try and pass off, but crucial bits were left out, I would have no idea that either chicken or pasta is in the conversation only having heard "rice". When someone is just talking at me, I can decently pass off as being engaged but the second I'm required to participate in the conversation I'm screwed. Seem familiar? At which point I have 2 options, try to give a bullshit answer, or admit that I missed what they were saying and ask them to repeat

Lucifer, unfortunately, is trying so damn hard to hide that he's dealing with like 24/7 dissociation, so he can't admit that he's missing entire chunks of the conversation, hence his really weird replies. He does eventually get the full picture and then he and Charlie start having the real conversation

Also, the Alastor/Lucifer rivalry was hilarious but also really indicative of more of what Lucifer is dealing with

Alastor is, unfortunately, really good at picking up people's insecurities, and thanks to Charlie's description earlier and watching Lucifer clearly trying to overcompensate, he immediately picks up on the fact that Lucifer KNOWS he struggles to be a good dad (we know cuz it's cuz of the depression, hard to be engaged when your brain keeps turning off) and decides to rub salt in the wound by pretending he's been acting as a surrogate father to Charlie. Now why Alastor decided to pick a fight with the king of hell is beyond me, I do not understand Alastor (and I LIKE IT) (maybe it's cuz Alastor thinks he's hot shit and was expecting Lucifer to at least have heard of him but Lucifer just treats him like a nobody? who knows)(why would Lucifer listen to radio anyways when he can't even pay attention to a conversation it'd just be white noise)

But yeah I just was expecting someone who oozed either charisma or presence and instead I got a depressed dad who's dissociating so bad he can barely function and be present in his life. The only thing it seems he CAN do is make rubber ducks cuz his daughter really liked it that one time

Idk Lucifer is tragic to me. Whatever the full details of what heavan did to him absolutely broke him and he can't deal with it. He's aware of it, and he doesn't know how to fix it, so he tries to over compensate and sorta makes an ass out of himself but no one says or does anything cuz this guy is supposed to be THE king of hell

Suddenly it's making a lot more sense why he just rolls over and lets heaven do what it wants and even told Charlie to go in his place the start of the show. He's not in any headspace to hold a basic conversation let alone negotiate! He didn't even know who Alastor was, he's been so out of touch

idk I like him, he seems sweet, I hope Charlie brings some light back into his life. He really needs to get out of that rubber duck room

[velvetydream]

꒰ :🥀 [ Till death do us part ] ”♡ᵎ꒱ˀˀ ↷ ⋯

Summary : What if Alastors dear little darling wife, his partner in crime, the person he thought he'd never see again, turns up with Mimzy on the day of the visit of the big boss of hell.

Pairing : Alastor x fem! Reader

Word count : 1899 Words

Genre : Fluff , Drama , Angst

Warnings ➵ Mentions of death, you're shorter than

Vaggie, possessive Alastor, swearing

Prequel -> > The radio star lost <

a/n : I love this trope ngl, tried to not make him to much out of character, hope it worked.. T T

Also I'm rather new to Hazbin Hotel, so I say sorry if anythings seems wrong or out of character! ><

┌───────────────────────── ·  ·  ·  · ♡

The whole hotel was a bit chaotic right now, Lucifer himself would be visiting in just a bit and Charlie wanted everything to be perfect. Colorful decorations were hanging everywhere, a banner was hung up for welcoming the king of hell, how does one even welcome the king of hell into their hotel? Charlie was probably the most stressed of all, but Vaggie did her best to calm her nervous wreck of a girlfriend down.

The moment Lucifer stepped into the hotel was meant to make everything go down, Alastor and his Ego had somehow always a snarky remark against Lucifer. Charlie tried her best to keep them apart, introducing her other friends, before she announced how she would be needing his help. And again the banter between the king of hell and the radio demon started all over again. As if throwing insults at each other before wasn't enough already, now they were pulling at Charlie left and right, like two babies fighting over a toy.

But all things come to an end, which Charlie was thankful for right now, as Mimzy, apparently a friend of Alastor, which was interesting to know he even had any, came barging in with a grand entrance. As the woman now settles down at the bar, talking with the others, Alastor and Charlie took Lucifer on a walk around, Husker disappearing for a second too, but soon joining them at the bar again, a scowl on his face, but something else, undescribable behind his eyes.

A bang was heard through the whole hotel as the entrance door was slammed open and heard could be an angry voice. "MIMZY! You little bitch!" A demon, a slight bit shorter than Vaggie probably, walked in. A scowl evident on the face, as her eyes scan over the place, before falling on the woman she was looking for. "How dare you leave me in the shit like that?! You've got it coming if those sharks don't kill you, I certainly will!" Ignoring the questioning looks of Angel and Husker, you stomp over to the blonde, ready to yank at her hair, when suddenly a bit of debris was thrown through the window and landed beside you, barely missing you by a hair. "The fuck?" The demon's head craned around, looking out the window and there they were, those fuckers Mimzy was in debt to.

You didn't really have time to react much, as three people stormed into the entrance hall, all you could catch was a glimpse of red before the person ran outside, screams of the sharks could be heard, at least those were finally taken care of.

The loan sharks were gone and fought off quickly by that person, his voice now directed to Mimzy, your own eyes on her yourself with a scowl. She and that red demon apparently knew each other quite well, as Mimzy was walking to the door, you finally really looked at the demon. He had short red and black hair, ears sat atop his head, despite scowling Mimzy he was smiling, though a sinister smile it seems. His attire was almost completely red too, a cane was clutched in his hands, as he watched Mimzy walk off, you could only make out a small part of his face. The man seemed so familiar as if you had known him for a long time.. Your heart was running a mile right now, it was getting hard to breathe, and then...

"Thank you Alastor, really.." The long-haired blonde spoke up.. That name, it couldn't be right? Mimzy would've told you, she knew him, she would've definitely told you.. right? You must be mistaken right now.. Your eyes were fixated on the man called Alastor, the voices and sounds around you were all a mush, drowned out as your brain was going all around. Now that you could see his face, he definitely had some resemblance to him.. to your late husband, who had died before you. You were his assistant, his partner in crime, when the news hit you that he was shot, it broke your heart, but still, you continued on alone, killing. That's probably what also got you to hell, well sooner than later you were figured out and soon arrived here in hell.

"Yo smiles, this girly is gawking at you for minutes now." Slowly voices were coming back to you, the white spider beside you talked, pointing his thumb at you, the red-haired now meeting your eyes, his ears straightening and standing alert like the ones of a deer caught in headlight. What irony if he was your Alastor, the irony of dooming him with deer-like features, after getting shot assumed for a deer while hiding one of the many bodies. That day you decided to let him go alone, oh if you just hadn't done that, maybe you both would be alive or you would've at least arrived together in hell.

Alastor was taking slow steps to you, the smile on his face looking strained, yet it never disappeared, his hand was reaching out for you but stopped. Eyes moving over your form, taking in everything. Resemblance to his wife evident, but.. how did he never notice you before? Had he ever met you, walked past, maybe even taken a second glance but dismissed this feeling he has right now.

Swiftly he grabs your wrist, dragging you behind him, ignoring the calls of his name of the other residents, his mind plagued by one only thought, more like one only person.. you.

Stumbling behind him, his grip rather firm on your wrist, yet it felt comforting as if you knew he would never hurt you. Not in your lifetime and also not now in your afterlife. Eyes watching the back of his head, you were wondering what expression his face harbors right now. Was he happy? Was he confused? Disappointed? Maybe he knew where you were all this time but didn't want to meet you. No, he wasn't like this. He may have been distant sometimes while alive, but in the end, he was always a darling to you. Taking care of you, just as he vowed on your wedding day. A distant memory, yet one of the most beautiful ones you have.

A door was opened and as you were pulled inside, the door closed. Steps echoed through the room, you noticed a forest on the other side of the room, but that didn't rather faze you, eyes on him again.. and him only. "Al-" You were interrupted by laughter, the man before you was hugging himself, his arms around him, yet you still weren't able to see his face. "D-Do you know.. How often have I thought about you?!" His voice was loud, a static sound like from a radio accompanied it. One of his hands was tearing at his hair now. "That bitch never told me... I'll make sure to kill her for that.. She kept you from me.." The laughter got even louder, as if the man before you was going insane.

This behavior was nothing new to you, he used to be like this, high on adrenalin when another murder was successful.. Or when he was close to being figured out by the police and detectives, yet he always slipped away right through their incapable fingers.

"I always wondered what happened to you, if you grew old with someone new.." If you were able to see his face right now, you would be able to see the sinister yet possessive smile on his face, his eyes darting around the room.

This all ended in a second when he felt a soft hand on his. He knew this hand, he also knew the person it belonged to like the front of his pocket. "I would never, I carried on alone in your memories, yet I was never as skilled as you darling, so sooner than later they connected all the dots to me." A low chuckle could be heard again, the static radio sound calmed down again too. The tall man slowly turned around now, his hand engulfing your own, his fingers softly running over your own, before he linked them together. How he had missed this feeling, despite having a distaste for people touching him, you were different. Your touch felt warm, like the summer sun kissing his skin, it felt comforting.

"I've missed you mon amour.." His voice was soft, probably the softest it had ever been since he had arrived in hell. His hand guides yours up to his lips, as he closes his eyes and presses a soft kiss to the back of your hand, a smile, now softer, on his lips. He was never one for kissing you on the lips, he definitely favored kissing your hand, like the gentleman he has always been. "I figured with how you were talking seconds ago my dear.." A soft smile was creeping up onto your lips too, mirroring his own one. Red eyes open again, your hand still pressed to his face, but now he was rather holding your hand to his cheek. "Oh how I wished I could've stayed with you my darling, we would've been so successful.." Giggling at his words, with him at your side, you probably would have been going for a long time. "But who says we can't be successful now?" A smirk etched its way onto your husband's face, oh how he loved your daring little mind, always thirsting for blood. With you by his side again now, he would definitely be able to get everything done that he wanted.

"Shall we go back? I want to meet your friends properly." Wanting to pull away your hand, he softly gives you a tug, your head landing on his chest now. Wide eyes look the the side now, as you weren't really able to move, his arms having snaked around you and his chin resting on your head. This was unusual much physical contact, but figured that you hadn't seen each other for multiple decades he yearned for your touch just a slight bit. Your arms lying around him, embracing the hug. "Let's just stay here a few minutes more, we got enough time to introduce you to everyone down there but for now.. let me have you for myself." Nodding softly, your head rests on his chest, as your eyes close and you simply enjoy the presence of your dearly beloved husband.

"What do you mean 'married to smiles'?!" Angel, as he was introduced to you, shouted from his place on the couch now, staring at you flabbergasted. "We've been married for quite a few years before his death." Smiling you answered his question. Alastor didn't like all the attention you were getting, but sooner than later he would have you all to himself again when you two go back to his cozy hotel room or the radio tower. "So you two fu-" Angel wasn't even able to finish his question before he shut himself up as he noticed the look on Alastors face. This time he would've been dead for sure if he finished that question.

Overall everyone invited you happily into their little hotel family, it was amazing. Charlie immediately took a liking to you and if you're being honest she quickly was viewed by you like a daughter.