#that's just my personal opinion on the matter

[the-lady-of-the-labyrinth]

Hi there, I'm a queer elder who fought and sacrificed for many of the rights and privileges you take for granted. I have spent my whole life being othered and treated like an outsider, when not outright excluded and harassed, all while resisting bigotry and spitting in its face—nice to meet you!

Yes, of course I respect gender diversity, thank you for asking. I also respect language. The trouble I have is people expecting pronouns to do things they were never intended to do. They are deliberately vague. Ideally, there should be only one form of (non-gendered) pronoun, but our language evolved into two. I think it's fair to add a third, but no need to go any further. Pronouns are not designed to promote self-actualization or otherwise enumerate dozens of identities for everyone to track and enumerate. Again, they are supposed to be vague, not your second name.

You're free to disagree, though it's not my intention to disrespect anyone. I think people are entitled to create and define their own spaces, and if dozens of pronouns are what you want for your space, more power to you. I just think we have to respect other people's spaces, for better or worse, and it's my opinion that forcing our beliefs on others can be counterproductive, especially when we push too hard.

Did I mention that uniquely gendered along with a complex nomenclature of so-called sexual identities? In fact, I'm the most unique person I've ever met, and yet I still don't expect language to bend to my will. We have the right to use language however we want, but not to create new words and expect everyone to use them, no matter how helpful those words might be.

So now we get back to the pearl clutching, the part where you call me the worst person since Hitler, etc. etc. etc. Hopefully I'm wrong and you're one of those few people still inclined towards polite disagreement and civil discourse (but I'm not holding my breath, no offense).

it/its pronouns are not inherently dehumanizing, unless the user wants them to be. it/its pronouns aren't weird. it/its pronouns aren't too hard to use. people who only use it/its pronouns need to have this be respected no matter what your beliefs are. you don't get to single out people with "weird" pronouns and misgender us and use incorrect pronouns. accept someone who uses it/its as you support someone who uses they/them. there's nothing wrong with it/its pronouns. respect its users.

[seat-safety-switch]

In this season, which scientists are calling "minty," there's no shortage of exotic candies. Over the course of just a few weeks, the average Westerner is bombarded by many confusing kinds of dazzling confections that are otherwise inaccessible to them during the rest of the year.

Primarily, one of the biggest rivalries of the season is not between freak reindeer and regular reindeer, or even elves versus privacy regulations, but between two titans of mint. Have you ever wondered why they make peppermint and spearmint? When I was recently contracted to demolish a gingerbread house, I wondered too. They taste very similar, I remarked in amongst chews of an entire dough-based family and their gumdrop dog.

Here's the thing, though: peppermint is a cross between spearmint and some other mint. I went to the library to find this shocking fact out for myself. That's right. Spearmint is peppermint's dad. Or mom! We'll ask the botanists for their opinion on that whole issue. They're essentially the same mint, just like when your uncle says that you look a lot like your parents and keep exhibiting the same concerning signs of developing mental illness that his sibling did in their youth.

What's shocking is that, for all these years, we have held tight to a false rivalry. At most, it's a generational squabble between the new world of peppermint ("fuck you, dad! I play my music loud because I love life") and spearmint ("for the love of Christ, please stop leaving all the lights on in this house.") Why compare them at all? Why have our social and financial betters brought this fight into our homes? This false competition of the oligarchs only serves to fill their pocket with money we thought we were using to identify ourselves as "peppermint people" or "spearmint loyalists." If it really doesn't matter, why not serve up a big mixed bag of spearmint and peppermint together, in the spirit of the Christmas season?

Personally, I'm going to do my part. I'm heading down to the grocery store right now, and I'm going to mix up all the bags of peppermints and spearmints on the little pegs. People won't know what they're buying! Unless they read the label, but I'm hoping that by now they're all too stressed from being around their families to be able to use conscious thought.

[rowie264]

If someone criticizes something, it doesn't mean that they hate it. It also works the other way around. If you like something, it doesn't mean that it's done well from an objective point of view.

I love Jinx. Her design, her story, her personality, her character arc... I was just fascinated by her. Jinx has become one of my favorite characters in media in general. It was the continuation of her story that I was waiting for the most.

Jinx is still my favorite character in season 2. I love almost every scene with her. How she did Sevika's arm and the subsequent fight with the Smeech, the fight with Vi in Act 1, the prison break, search for Vander in the mines, epic appearance during the battle against Noxus.

I got a lot of positive emotions while watching s2 and especially during Jinx's appearance on the screen. But… an emotional response and objective assessment are two different things. And objectively, Jinx's character in season 2 is OOC and poorly written.

Removing very importand part of her story and personality. Her mental issues almost completely disappear. This is a very important aspect of her character. And no, Isha's presence and a "more favorable environment" would not heal her, the whole 2nd act is completely unrealistic and looks stupid, since all her problems with her mental health were magically solved off-screen;

Irrelevant piece of plot. Her arc of "Zaun symbol" passes by her - she becomes a symbol by accident, ignores the consequences and directly encounters all this revolutionary mood only during Isha's saving from Stillwater (at the same time saving her followers - an indirect action, not a purposeful one). So this arc is kinda about her, but she doesn't seem to participate in it herself, and it ends with literally nothing (like the whole Zaun revolution);

Making her more appealing to wider audience. Her hatred of Piltover and Caitlyn just disappeared. Yes, while she was with Vi in the mines she said "piltie goons who murdered mom and dad," but… that's all? Jinx doesn't kill a single enforcer in the entire 2nd season (although, for example, she could have in Stillwater) and tells Caitlyn "I didn't know your mother was there." Let me remind you that Jinx literally giggled in s1 when she killed a dozen enforcers during gemstone kidnapping, killed enforcers on the bridge without any care, she hated Caitlyn fiercely because she "stole" her sister from her, and she couldn't not know that Cassandra was a councilor. It isn't showed how and why she changed her opinion and this is important thing to her character, you can't explain such change with microexpressions or parallels;

Unrealistic happy family reunion. The reunion of Jinx, Vi, and Vander is a spectacular moment from Disney. Do you remember how Jinx reacted when Vi returned? Yes, she was happy but as soon as she spotted Cait she freaked out and immidiately thought that Vi betrayed her. Imagine what would happen if her supposedly dead - bc of her btw - father had returned and now looks like some animal;

Silco mattered much more to Jinx. A very "subtle" replacement of Silco for Vander in the role of father (Jinx calls him father, sniffs Vander's jacket and not Silco's), although Silco played probably a bigger role in this? And Jinx remembers about him like 2 times? Although it's been about 7-10 years since Vi's "death" in season 1, Jinx was still triggered by just a similar appearance. Apparently, Silco wasn't that important to Jinx (which is not true); I could still keep talking about Jinx, but let's leave it at that.

I love Jinx even in season 2. I like watching scenes with her. But my emotional attachment doesn't stop me from seeing that Jinx's character in s2 is not a continuation of Jinx's character of the end of s1. Her image is broken, the arcs are not completed, the relationships with other characters are poorly written.

[wardensantoineandevka]

I won't get around to writing a properly developed post on it, but speaking generally and assuming broad good faith, I personally think the anachronism in Veilguard is fine. I know it's a deeply held bit of style for a lot of people, and many hold the directive about no anachronism as important to things feeling properly Dragon Age.

Personally, I never felt it THAT important. I roll my eyes at nitpicking about historically accurate costuming too, and I pause to wonder what IS "anachronism" in fantasy. I think a lot of the style of the games leaned so hard on it that, in some places, it was a substituting this rule in place of developing stronger individual style or voice. I love this series, but I don't feel like characters (notably once you got past core cast), locations, etc. always and consistently had a strong sense of voice, both in terms of diction but also in visual direction. I feel like even the music gets this a little bit, since Veilguard feels more musically interesting to me than many of the prior tracks because, I think, the soundtrack is allowed to feel a little less like vaguely European medieval heroic fantasy.

There's always been anachronism, but I think the strict reliance on adhering to a particular conception of what A Fantasy Story looks and sounds like really hampered, at least for me, the development of style identity. Veilguard's voice and style broke from that in a way that did feel successfully more specific and striking for the story and characters it's trying to dress. I think being released from this directive does—because there's no longer what we bring ourselves to the table from our familiarity with the genre and pattern recognition—however, magnify flaws in how Bioware always has treated the setting as just the backdrop against which these dramas play out. But that's outside the scope of my thoughts here. I'll just summarize that with: that's a consistent Bioware problem, and I don't think it's inherently wrong to approach worldbuilding as merely dressing the set for your story, though perhaps that isn't always the most successful approach here and I know many fans are very invested in the setting itself and its development, so that would put us all at cross purposes.

Don't get me wrong. There IS a place for that sort of directive, a rule against things that scan too modern. But then, I think for it to work, you have to have a very firm idea of your own voice, of your individual style and direction working with that directive, and frankly, I don't think Bioware EVER really had a super strong grasp of it here.

I do think the character design especially, character voice, and visual identity suffered SO much in many earlier instances because of this directive. Meanwhile, I think it's interesting and striking to have things like, for example, Neve clearly drawing from film noir and how that informs how I approach and think about her as a character and how appropriate it feels that Lucanis and Illario end on the stage of an opera house. I feel like being released from having to worry about anachronism has, for me, produced some of the strongest instances of style and voice in the series in a long time.

And I know a lot of people feel the OPPOSITE, which is a matter of personal experience and taste, but for my own, it always felt like the series was weighed down by a notion of needing to properly emulate The Genre. (We've all looked at the infamous browns and muds of Origins, a game I am fond of. This is why it looks and sounds like that, in my opinion.) This fear of being too anachronistic or too modern often left the series not really feeling, to me, like it's really had a firm sense or idea of what its style or voice was, of what made it sound or look like itself, because it was always afraid of being too modern while also feeling afraid to not look enough like a heroic epic fantasy.

I think getting rid of that and no longer fearing it has done a lot for developing a stronger voice with a look, sound, and feel for Veilguard that feels more specific and conveys story and character so much better and more confidently. Because, in the end, that's supposed to be what this is all in service of: conveying character and story. I feel like Veilguard, in being released from this restriction, has developed a stronger voice with which to do it.

[klarolinexluv]

Something has really stuck with me that some Anti Regulus Black person said and I want to share my thoughts on it.

Basically, they said that we, or people that like Regulus have been giving Regulus Lilys characteristics and traits and relationships instead of giving them to Lily and are using this to replace Lily.

From my pov, I can understand how that comes across. Moonwater, in canonical type universes, usually come together over their love for literature, something, that as far as I understand was how Lily and Remus used to become friends in fics.

When I think of this situation, I don’t see it as Lily being replaced, I see it as Remus having more friends then just the Marauders and Lily. I see it as Remus making friends.

In all the fics I’ve read, majority of them, Lily and Remus are always already friends! 9 times out of 10, if Remus has a POV and he is interacted with Lily or thinking about Lily, he refers to her has his best friend.

Idk who needs to hear this but Remus can have more friends than just Lily and the Marauders! In fact, EVERY. SINGLE. CHARACTER. Can have more friends then just the friend groups that they have been assigned to from the fandom.

I personally love the idea that Regulus and Remus get close because of their shared interest in books and knowledge. In fact, I love it so much when this happens. I also love when Remus is the one to introduce (formally) Lily and Regulus. Because they have shared interests! They all have shared interests and that’s what they bond over.

If we just forget about ships for a moment - Jily/Jegulus - Regulus and Lily would and could actually be really close friends. At their cores they are very similar and have similar morals and codes.

Like my girl Lily defeated Voldemort the first time. You cannot tell me that she did not have some deep interest and understanding of Dark Magic that is really not talked about enough. I mean, she was friends with Snape for a LONG time! Even against all her Gryffindor friends and dorm mates advice and opinions. She was friends with Snape for a long time and they definitely studied dark magic together. The only reason they stopped being friends was because Snape called her a slur and began siding with people that would have gladly seen Lily and people like Lily 6 feet under.

And then Regulus! He may not have made the best choices but when it mattered the most, he chose to do the right thing and go against Voldemort. He is the first to have done so! My guy was smart. He definitely knew so much magic that he has likely forgotten more than anyone would ever even know.

Regulus and Lily are both so smart and they would have bonded over their shared intelligence, their love for knowledge and books. Remus was probably terrified the day he realised he was the reason these two evil geniuses even started talking.

Maybe instead of saying that Regulus is being given Lily’s characteristics and traits, maybe think about how this would affect the two characters when put in the same room.

I personally think that they would argue for a long time and then Lily would probably say something that gives Regulus pause and then Lily would gently press on that and then Regulus would go have a long hard think and then come back and hesitantly ask Lily questions that Lily would happily answer and then they would be tentative friends!

Regulily have so much in common but they also have a lot of differences and I don’t think enough people see that because they are too focused on ships rather than the characters themselves and their motives and actions.

I’m not shy in admitting that I fuck with romantic regulily. They are my guilty pleasure ship and I am not shy about saying that.

Regulily, platonically, romantically, it doesn’t matter. They have the biggest grounds for friendship and growth.

Regulus and Lily can teach each other so much and I honestly think it’s the biggest missed opportunity when they are pinned against each other rather than working together.

I fear I’ve gone WAY off topic.

In the context of relationships, the jily vs jegulus idea. I feel like I need to hold people hands when I say this because the two ships are very different.

WARNING! OPINIONS!

To me, Jily is a rivals to lovers relationship. I don’t think they are grumpy/sunshine purely because I don’t see Lily as the grumpy trope. I very much think that Jily are academic rivals. Where James just naturally understands everything and gets good marks whether he studied or not and Lily has to study heavily before she understands a topic enough to pass, like Lily to me has to study throughly before everything sticks and she understands the topic so much more than is really required for her coarse work.

I also don’t think Jily was James falls in love at first sight and Lily hates him for years until she gives in and goes on a date with him. Sure it’s a bit cute but i definitely prefer James developing a crush and not telling anyone other than his friends. I very much fuck with James being uncharacteristically shy about his crushes on people. I fuck with James losing his ability to talk or function around the person he fancies and it comes off as arrogance and a bit of a joke when he is actually being genuine.

I love the idea that Lily falls for him slowly, like initially, she thinks she hates him, she loathes the fact that he doesn’t need to study and he can just goof off and do whatever and still get perfect grades, I think Lily gets jealous of James and thinks she despises him because she thinks he is trying to make fun of her when all he is trying to do is talk to her and get her attention.

I love the idea that Remus is constantly trying to talk James up to Lily, “he’s really not that bad once you get to know him.” And “He’s harmless, Lils.” And things like that but Lily has NONE of it!

I think Lily starts to fall for James when they are paired together for a project that is a big mark on their finals. I think Lily goes into this thinking that she is going to hate it when actuality, James is kind and thoughtful and helps her when she struggles. He doesn’t make fun of her, he sits down quietly and gives her tips and tricks that he discovered when he studies privately, (this would be when she finds out that maybe it doesn’t all come as naturally to James as she thought) and then they end up getting the best grade in their year on the assignment but they don’t stop hanging out, they don’t stop studying together. Lily slowly falls for James because of his mind and they form a friendship and then James would ask her out one day and Lily would find herself stunned because if he had asked her a few months ago, she would have harshly declined but in the moment, she finds herself blushing and agreeing without a hint of hesitation.

And that’s how I imagine Jily.

Now, Jegulus.

Jegulus is enemies to lovers, they are grumpy/sunshine. I very much think that they did hate eachother. They did not like eachother for many reasons and they would argue and fight in the halls.

I’m very much into jegulus but I don’t think I’ve seen a fic that has written them as actually enemies to lovers in a canonical setting.

Jegulus to me is very push and pull. One step forward, two steps backwards.

I honestly think that sure, when they met at 11 and 12 when Sirius had his little brother trailing after him and introduced them to each other, they both had the moment of instant connection that they both immediately denied and dismissed and buried under hatred.

James and Regulus see each other as competition. Regulus sees James as the one that stole his brother. James sees Regulus as the brother that doesn’t deserve Sirius.

Because Sirius told James all about his little brother all through first year and James was exited to meet him for a long time until they met and instantly realised that Regulus is a two faced snake and doesn’t deserve Sirius.

Because Sirius told Regulus all about his best friend in every letter, in every stolen moment during the holidays. Regulus was exited to meet James for a long time until they met and instantly realised that James isn’t the golden ray of sunshine that Sirius claims him to be but a brother stealing asshole.

I honestly think that Jegulus is THE enemies to lovers.

I don’t think Jegulus even had a civil conversation until after Sirius ran away. And even this conversation started as an argument. I think that they only reason the argument stopped and they started genuinely talking to eachother is because Regulus’ mask broke and James saw the hidden emotions underneath that Regulus was trying to hide.

I think that James held onto prejudice for a long time. He saw all Slytherins as evil and then didn’t think about that for years until he sees Regulus crack and then James has to rethink everything he has ever thought.

That’s how I think Jegulus starts and I don’t think they ever really talk about what they are or what they are doing for a very long time, to the point (if we are talking in a canonical sense) that they break and fall apart. To the point where they end up on different sides of a war.

ANYWAY! (this is really long and if you've read this far, just know that you are my favourite person in the entire world and I adore you to the ends of the universe).

Regulus and Lily, though they share many characteristics and traits and fundamentally different people. Even in the context of the people they are shipped with, even in the context of their friendships.

I love them both so much and I think saying that Lily is being replaced by Regulus is incredibly wrong and also perhaps a little misogynistic.

They are both incredible characters, who should not be defined by their relationships.

Like I said before. In the context of war, both Lily and Regulus were the first. Regulus may have failed to complete his mission and Lily may have succeeded in killing Voldemort… but at the end of the day both of them did not do anything in the long run. Voldemort was still able to return, the horcruxes still need to be destroyed and Harry still had to finish what the people before him started, Harry still had to fight a war he had no part in starting.

[contemplatingoutlander]

Historian Timothy Snyder: Trump lives in a fictional reality.

"[Trump] understands not the rules of reality, but the rules of fiction. So for him there's no such thing as lying, because there's no such thing as the truth. We're all just in this story together."

—Timothy Snyder, Levin Professor of History at Yale.

Please take the 1:28 minutes to watch this video--it's worth it. The unfortunate part about Trump living "in a fictional reality" is that he is dragging our nation into that "fictional reality" with him, and in the process is destroying what remains of democracy in the U.S.

TRANSCRIPT:

SNYDER: The first thing to understand about Mr. Trump is that he does inhabit a completely different mental world, and he inhabits it naturally and he inhabits it very gracefully. He lives in a world of fiction. Mr. Trump is not a traditional person who has made a career where he's had to deal with life around him. He's never actually been that successful in grappling with any particular element of reality. Where he has been successful is as a character on television. He's never been a successful businessman, but he has played a successful businessman on television. He understands not the rules of reality, but the rules of fiction. So for him there's no such thing as lying, because there's no such thing as the truth. We're all just in this story together. So the ways in which he's able to bring us into the world are first of all, just by saying all the time things that aren't true. A typical politician will lie now and then, but a typical politician will also recognize the principle that there is truth, and so when caught in a lie might apologize. In Mr. Trump's case that never happens because he very specifically and intentionally wants to fill up the whole space with untruth, um to fill up everything with untruth so that we're confused. The second stage is once we get there, once he changes the office of the presidency so it's no longer about talking about the world, but instead about creating the story, then he says, Distrust everyone else. There's nothing really true, it's just my opinion and your opinion. And since I'm the president, and I have media behind me, in the end of the day it's going to be my opinion that matters. Once we get to that point, where everybody doubts everything, and it's only the person who has the most media or the biggest Twitter account who counts, at that point, it's very hard to have anything like a democracy. [This transcript was corrected for accuracy; punctuation & emphasis were added.]

[edited] __________________ About Timothy Snyder: According to Timothy Snyder's Bluesky account: He is the "Levin Professor of History at Yale. Author of On Freedom, On Tyranny, with 20 new lessons on Ukraine, Our Malady, Road to Unfreedom, Black Earth, and Bloodlands."

A shout out to @ladytaurach whose earlier post made me aware of this video, which unfortunately, Tumblr wouldn't allow me to add to her post.

[vaxxman]

Oh I'm sad to see people didn't like comic 7, I thought it was very well done.

This isn't an invitation to an argument, I just want to say my opinion because I'm seeing a lot of people criticising the last chapter.

We got a lot of answers and everything that seemed conveniently placed for plot was completely in the scope of how the previous stories have worked before. I thought it was funny that soldier lived in a cave of Australium. It's just as convenient as Medic having a deal with the devil and the mercs being unable to die. Or Grey Mann having a daughter who no one wants to punch in a fist fight. Or Sniper's parents coincidentally being involved with the sinking of New Zealand.

I think it was a very good choice to not let the mercs do anything plot driving in this chapter, because this conflict was never a conflict that could have been ended by the mercs. They wouldn't even have cared, heh. We've known that everything was carefully orchestrated by the Admin, so it could only have been resolved by those who are part of the bigger conflict. Hence Miss Pauling, the Admin and Saxton do most of the plot. Everyone else already had a lot of screen time in the previous chapters, but none of their stories were truly contributing to the actual conflict at hand, so the story can't come to an end until we actually see the person who's been pulling the threads actually come to terms with what she was doing. I'm very happy that her ultimate plan turned out to just be a pointless act of revenge, since we've all known from the start that the gravel wars are pointless. This is just one more dimension deeper into how pointless it is.

Managing to resolve the story and making sure all characters receive a happy end the way they did was more than I had hoped for comic 7. But just to summarise how I think everyone received their peace of mind across all comics:

1. Sniper: Finds out he's adopted -> figures out his step parents were his true family after all

2. Spy: Really wants to tell Scout that he's his dad -> actually manages to say the words, even if he wasn't honest with his appearance

3. Soldier: Delusional hater of commies -> marries a Russian woman and stops claiming racist things, because Zhanna as a person was more important to him than whatever he believed about Russian people. Still weird, not with less delusion but genuinely a sweet father and husband. Exaggerated and maximally silly way of how to actually change people's racist opinions in real life.

4. Scout: Upset that he can't get laid and thinks he has to be More Man -> glows up by becoming a dad who steps up and is less preoccupied with getting the girl of his dreams. His kids are what matters to him now and he becomes like his mom

5. Heavy: Worried about his family in Siberia -> his sisters show him they don't need him to protect them all the time and everyone moves to America so he can be with them. His sisters get to live freely.

6. Engineer: Is involved with the conflict since his grandpa, and is contractually unable to stop it -> tells Miss Pauling to sink all Australium in a trench so this never happens again

7. Saxton Hale: Wants to go back to the time when he was still actively doing things, gets his company stolen -> gets his company back but realises it doesn't make him happy. Leaves his company and joins Maggie again because fighting alongside her was what he's always wanted since we got glimpses of his past

8. Miss Pauling: Thinks the Administrator has a great plan that desperately needs her -> learns the plan was nothing at all and decides on the spot to end it by not giving Admin any more Australium because she realises she has been feeding into the conflict

Medic, Demoman, and Pyro never had a personal conflict to resolve. Medic had his moments to shine by sabotaging TFC and being in hell then coming back. Demoman had his arc with his liver leaving him and defeating the robots due to the alcohol in his blood. Medic scooped out parts of his brain to keep him unquestioning about his eye. Pyro is just a very simple character, and I say that with no judgement at all. Pyro is happy with arson, but also with a Dalmatian as their pet.

Everyone is still friends with each other and have their own little families. They come together to celebrate Smissmass at Scout's place. I think Saxton's last line "or do you want to live forever" was so well placed, being a nod to the meme from Expiration Date, as well as pointing out that, obviously, things have to come to an end we should embrace that ending when we see it's time.

And as always. If anyone doesn't like that any of these things, we are still free to make our own stories and reinterpret characters.

[fookinhellcurly]

Larry discussions and why they matter

I got asked today by an older, new fan through the Larry Resources Compilation I made (also posted on Reddit):

"I am genuinely curious, though, like….. why does this matter?"

As a previous chill fan (a directioner, and a larrie, apparently god my brain gets foggy sometimes lol) who barely recounts my own Larrying back in the day (college was a whirlwind and a fever dream to me lol sorry) and came back after Liam's passing, I, myself, have consumed all these Larry information only recently. But from the get go, I knew my convictions.

There might be new ones here who'd come across my blog, so I thought I'd share my answer here as well. I ended up making a bulleted list, and it was the best way I thought I could address the question + the extra notes they left in their comment:

—

Baby larries and misinformation: Most baby larries likely learned about Larry through edits on YouTube, TikTok, or Instagram reels. They then decided to dive deeper, which led them down the Larry rabbit hole and eventually to Reddit and Tumblr. However, much of what’s on social media is taken out of context. There’s a lot of misinformation being spread (especially from bluegreeners), which is part of why non-larries in the fandom get annoyed with us. Some fans take things to extremes without understanding the reality of what H and L are going through. This is why it’s crucial to encourage research and healthy discussions. New information (in a sense that we might have failed to discuss it before; recent example is this post I made about Harry's lyric change to "Louis ONTO my drawers" which happened in 2020) is discovered—or debunked—daily, so having a platform to share and discuss these findings is vital. This Larry research I made is extensive, yes, but TONS of information have been scrubbed from the internet for unknown reasons (i.e, about babygate). Some people are actively trying to bury the truth about Larry. Without blogs and accounts archiving this data over the past decade, we wouldn’t know half of what we do today. My goal here is to make navigating 15 years’ worth of information easier.

The bigger picture: So, what’s the point of all this? In my opinion, it’s not just about proving a point. It’s about understanding the awful and harsh realities of an industry that profits off our support as fans while exploiting the very people we admire. It’s about acknowledging that there’s more to H and L than the clips we see online. They were just kids with dreams who were abused and manipulated by their management. They had to fight to maintain their identities while achieving their goals. It’s heartbreaking to realize that despite progress, the queer community still faces immense barriers (extra: I read the summary of Rock Hudson's battle back in the day—it's a perfect example of how we cannot trust the narrative media feed us). H and L have spent years signaling and coding, trying to break through their closet, and only us Larries could see the signs. Meanwhile, the media and management continue to box them into heteronormative narratives. It honestly breaks my heart seeing Harry get accused of queerbaiting and Louis forced into this Louis Tomlinson™ laddy-lad image, a far cry from the vibrant, flamboyant, happy young man he used to be (his words: "He were a lot sweeter, this lad"). To be clear, I love Lou the way he is but I agree to what this person said, I wish we had seen how the grown-up version of 2010-2012 Louis.

The denials: If HL had cut this shit from the beginning. If they had explicitly denied that their relationship was, in fact, not real (No, they have not straightforwardly denied it because they always redirect or play with words when asked in front of the camera; and that includes L's denial this year), we would have accepted it. But they didn't. THEY fed us all these things to pick on for the past few years. The songs (god, the songs) and the parallels, the use of blue and green (they know what those colors mean to us—they would not use them lightly if they want us to not believe), the coded clothing and the signaling, the acts of defiance, etc.—what are all those for? It's crazy to think that H and L would "bait" us just for the sake of sales.

Finally, the point of not letting the "ancient texts" die and keeping track even in the present: You see, all of us probably became genuinely invested because of the bigger story. In hindsight, everything MAKES SENSE, but in real-time unfolding during the 1D days, when H and L were fighting the most, it was harder to make sense of these things. But because we have these timelines, analyses, and proofs that sometimes even take years to be established (i.e., the McDonald's x Carpool Karaoke 2015 where HL supposedly shared the milkshake—but the clip didn't see the light of day until 2020 came around), we finally get to make sense of a decade+ worth of legitimate stories. As you would observe, there would always be a couple of larries who would ask, "Why do you think they're still together when they haven't been seen in public for so many years?" I want to add my answer from this post:

"[...] I’ve established that being a larrie, like a true larrie and not a chill larrie, you really have to be strong with your beliefs. I know those two try to keep their peace for as long as they want to. And I know we’d probably still get more denials and stunts along the way, but we have to remember that those shouldn’t invalidate the TONS of proofs/receipts that already exist, nor ignore the signals those two send in return when they have to be involved in bs narratives fed to the public. […] There’d be days when it’d be harder to defend HL themselves even bcs of their actions and words that could hurt larries - so on our end, we don’t necessarily have to tolerate that and we’re allowed to be mad or doubt what we’re supposed to be fighting for (not doubting them per se; just the situation and the cause). Though again, for me, by the end of the day, I know there are million other reasons why we cannot bend the truth (and we larries ourselves have always strived to stay analytical and logical when dealing with proofs), and I’d still choose to hold on bcs I know they still need us to believe - even if they decide to keep things quieter like this year or not come out at all."

If no one keeps track of these things (because as subtle as they are, HL still drops hints even once in a blue moon), other people would probably fail to notice them. But they are still just as loud, though not in a way that some 'fans' appreciate (like comparing now with the 1D days when, of course, you’d see them in the same room most of the time). And that’s when hate comes in. Because they fail to see it, they decide to 'overwrite' the past—when the closet was glass and when HL was free to show us their truth. They try to erase the fact that Harry and Louis were forced into a closet: one being labeled as the charming, womanizer man who likes 'girls of a certain age,' and the other as the laddy-lad guy who was a partygoer and then entered fatherhood.

This is the reason why, even though the topics could be repetitive, I personally try to engage, help out, and contribute—it also encourages others to do so. We need each other to keep believing despite the BS we’re thrown. And while Larry has stopped signaling as much, I know they truly appreciate Larries who support them on the sidelines.

There are so many more things my brain probably wants to say, but I literally just woke up when I started writing this lol. I hope that made sense. Again, I am not mad or trying to be rude, but I think these things needed pointing out. ♡

—

That's it. Sums up my beliefs and my convictions as a larrie.

[hrizantemy]

me when i hear people defend feyre attacking the lady of autumn by saying she didn’t mean to/beron was her intended target: … how … how is that better?

like okay we all hate beron but he’s still a high lord, still someone you invited to form an alliance/negotiate with diplomatically. in a court where you are a guest might i add. you are a child they all saw practically naked two days ago, now playing house with a man (sorry, male) who willingly or otherwise tormented them for the better part of half a century .. because he gave you a pretty crown? how does one expect these old ass fae to not be condescending or reluctant? i’d have asked her to let the adults do the talking if she was piping in every two seconds telling me what to think and how to act.

the high lords’ meeting is my roman empire because it’s one of those instances where you have to let your jaw hit the floor because in what world - except one where sjm expects everyone to love her blorbo’s for all their correct opinions and positions - did any of that work?? with no consequences?? in fact they’re rewarded for their behaviour: tarquin rescinds the blood rubies, everyone’s chiming in about how they knew rhysand was the good guy all along, no one cares about the high lord who is why they’re all free rn (okay feyre broke the curse — tamlin’s curse. tamlin killed amarantha. he is why rhysand is free to rewrite history and the others have a future) i’m surprised there wasn’t a scene where the lady of autumn apologises to feyre for being in the way of her attack smh

This is one of the reasons I cannot like Feyre. The justification that she “didn’t mean to” attack the Lady of Autumn or that “Beron was her intended target” makes absolutely no sense and, frankly, makes the situation worse. How is it any better that her recklessness and inability to control her powers led to an innocent woman nearly being killed? The Lady of Autumn was already a victim of Beron’s abuse and violence, and Feyre—who should, of all people, understand the trauma of being hurt or manipulated by powerful individuals—just becomes another threat to her. How is that defensible in any way?

Even if Beron was her intended target, that doesn’t excuse the collateral damage of almost killing someone who was completely uninvolved in the fight. Feyre’s powers are vast, yes, but she constantly wields them with this mix of entitlement and carelessness that makes her more of a liability than a hero. It’s one thing to make mistakes; it’s another to make catastrophic ones and have people excuse them as if the consequences don’t matter.

And let’s be real—Feyre is never held accountable for these actions. The narrative either brushes it off or turns it into another moment for someone to coddle her and tell her how amazing she is. Meanwhile, the Lady of Autumn is left to fend for herself, as usual, trapped in her abusive marriage, and probably now terrified of Feyre as well. The complete lack of responsibility Feyre takes—or is made to take—for her actions is one of the biggest reasons I can’t root for her. She’s not a savior; she’s a wrecking ball with a savior complex.

The entire High Lords meeting was, without question, a complete disaster. It was supposed to be this grand gathering where the courts would come together to ally against Hybern, but instead, it devolved into petty squabbles, veiled insults, and outright hostility. Rhysand, for all his posturing as the most “progressive” High Lord, walked into the meeting with an attitude so smug it practically dared the others to disagree with him. Tamlin, true to form, took the bait and immediately turned the whole thing into a personal grievance fest. Beron was his usual insufferable self, Helion was flirting, and everyone else seemed more interested in holding grudges than actually saving the world.

Nobody trusted anyone, and honestly, who could blame them? These are the same people who’ve been at each other’s throats for centuries, and now they’re supposed to just shake hands and work together? Rhysand’s attempts at diplomacy mostly amounted to thinly veiled threats, Feyre’s speeches did little to inspire confidence, and Amren just sat there looking like she wanted to kill someone. It was all spiraling into chaos.

And then came Nesta.

Nesta, who was barely even acknowledged as part of the delegation. Nesta, who didn’t care about politics, alliances, or playing nice. Nesta, who was so angry, so filled with righteous fury, that her words cut through the nonsense like a blade. When she stood up and spoke about what Hybern had done, about what they would do if the High Lords didn’t put aside their differences and act, she commanded the room. She didn’t appeal to their egos or try to manipulate them; she just told the truth in the most raw, unflinching way possible.

Her speech wasn’t about Rhysand’s court, or Tamlin’s grudges, or Beron’s smug indifference. It was about the people who would suffer and die if they didn’t unite. It was about the horrors she had witnessed and endured. It was about the cost of their pride and their inaction. And for the first time in the entire meeting, there was silence.

That speech was the turning point. It was the reason the High Lords agreed to set aside their centuries of animosity and work together. Not because of Feyre’s attempts to “inspire” them, not because of Rhysand’s threats, but because Nesta Archeron reminded them of what was at stake.

And here’s the kicker: even after she was the one who secured the alliances they needed, the credit still went elsewhere. Feyre, Rhysand, and their crew walked away looking like the saviors, while Nesta was left on the sidelines again. The meeting may have been a mess, but Nesta was the only reason it wasn’t an outright failure.

Bonus mention: My man Thesan was the only unproblematic one at that entire meeting. He showed up, minding his own business, probably thinking, “I am a healer, not a referee for this soap opera.” While everyone else was busy airing centuries of dirty laundry, Thesan was out here like, “So… about that war threatening all our lives?”

He didn’t come for the drama, didn’t throw unnecessary shade, and managed to keep his court from looking like an absolute circus. Honestly, if I were him, I would’ve been this close to kicking the entire Night Court delegation out.

If anyone deserved to walk out of that meeting with dignity, it was Thesan. The man probably, sat down with a glass of wine after, and said, “Never again.”

[libraford]

There is... an attitude.... I've noticed. I think that the purity culture thinking has made it difficult to actually have a discussion about ethical interaction with cultures that aren't your own. Because I read up on this a lot for the above stated reasons- I want to make sure that what I'm doing doesn't hurt the people that it comes from. So I read a lot about it, I listen to discussions, I look for own-voice opinions. I look into the histories.

But most people assume that I'm coming at this from the perspective of a white 'woman' and not from someone who is trying their best to do things ethically. So I get a lot of hostility just for doing a thing that I could never have considered unethical.

Like... today's rant was inspired by someone who saw that I tagged the video of my photoshoot with #bellydance and decided that it was weird to do something that wasn't part of my own culture. But I'm not sure who its hurting, actually? I took some photos of myself dancing in my own house, wearing a costume that my girlfriend made for me, with a sword that used to be my mom's (because she was a bellydancer too). I neither made money nor spent money in the process. And I realize that its a really small thing, this person is a stranger to me. They don't know that I learned to dance from a professional from Turkey. They don't know that I've done a lot of research on which dances are closed and which ones are not. Their opinion shouldn't matter to me!

But they see a white person bellydancing and decide that I'm appropriating. And its kind of part of a larger issue.

And my questions regarding appropriation will ALWAYS be 'where are the lines?' Because I was told that the line was 'someone is harmed.' But it seems to be moving towards 'perceived white person is partaking in a culture that is not a white specific culture.' And I think that THAT crosses a line ethically- because that's getting into 'cultures cannot mix,' which is some nazi shit.

Like its a nuanced topic that I think is turning into a broad-brush situation and I do not like where its going because it discourages even good faith discussions.

Often, when someone tells me that I'm not allowed to bellydance because I'm white, it leads me to look at the dances of white people- specifically the kinds of folk dances that are part of my heritage.

...have yall seen Hallingdans? Shit gets wild!

[yanderenightmare]

Do you normally get any 'ew, you're disgusting' shit in your inbox? I just now posted my first incest fic and got one like 'i hope you don't have any siblings lalala'. Prior to that, I was like "how do these authors go untouched by antis?" but then I realised that it was a tad bit naive of me lol. I was going to respond with a taunt but decided to just delete it because it wasn't worth the effort.

Are they frequent and are they easy to ignore?

Good question! I was actually going to make a post on this, as others have asked me the same thing, so here we go!

♡ Personal experience!

I get my fair share of hate from time to time—more often when I publish things that are more taboo than other excepted things—for example, like you say, incest, as well as bestiality, wide age gap, born-sexy-yesterday readers, etc.

It's an odd thing, as haters will often accept the fact that I write rape for titillation but will take issue with these other tropes. But anyway, we can talk about the nonsensical opinions of haters all day, but it wouldn't really do us any good.

So, here's my advice.

♡ First off, accept that haters are gonna hate!

Some people won't like what you write. And that's fine. The problem is that they feel the need to tell you that—at which point, you'll just have to console yourself by telling yourself that no decent person would be rude to a total stranger whom they don't know the first thing about and, therefore, whatever they have to say warrants neither second thought nor reply.

With that being said, however...

♡ You gotta do what feels right!

Engage or don't engage, do what you need to feel at peace. Sure, you can be the so-called bigger man and ignore all the meanies, but you absolutely don't have to!

Of course, we can be cool as cucumbers and say, "Not worth the effort," but who are we kidding? This is Tumblr, and you're allowed to rant when you want in whatever manner you want!

So, if you feel you gotta bite back to maintain your sanity, then that's what you should!

However, I do believe there's a way to go about it!

♡ Never go to bed angry!

This is my personal advice, but if you ever choose to acknowledge hate or critique, do so with tact and with based and factual arguments instead of slinging heated insults in return.

This way, you walk away from the fight feeling good about what you've said and not worse off than before. In other words, don't stoop down to their level.

I actually feel in many ways that answering hate can be rather therapeutic this way, as you've succesfully turned something negative into soemthing positive!

♡ The difference between hate and critique!

Actually doesn't matter. You're not really obligated to answer either if you don't want to.

But for the sake of differentiating the two: "Ew, you're disgusting" is hateful slander, but "Incest is wrong, and you're actively condoning it by writing what you write" is a genuine critique.

And it bears repeating, you don't have to address either because you don't owe anyone anything.

People are entiteld to their opnions just as much as you're free to disagree, and ignore if you want!

But something I've found is that explaining it to those who don't understand why we write such things, and furthermore why people want to read it without being interested in such things in real life, is actually quite a rewarding thing to do!

And by that, I mean it might make your critics and haters understand and rethink their comments, but it can also help your existing fans deal with their own similar self-loathing, and lastly, it's even great for your own mental health for when you yourself doubt your own mental standing!

Personally, in regard to the example I used above, when I get hit with the "you're condoning this and that" I just play the argument that those who play violent videogames aren't condoning the killing carried out by their avatar. Naturally, when roleplaying a fictional version of ourselves, we're not actually playing as ourselves.

Some people have a very hard time understanding this for some reason.

But anyway, moving on.

♡ Final advice!

Ignore and delete any and all the dumb, off-handed comments you feel like. If and when you want, return their rudeness with a cheeky smile and a slap on their ass. Be as cordial as you can be but as sassy as you feel you must—like an aged Queen who drinks her fair share of likewise wine.

But whatever you do, don't ever make things personal!

Though that's also my personal advice. I think, by making personal attacks, you're not being factual anymore, and you'll only feel worse for it. And by personal attacks, I mean calling people ignorant, dumb, awful, etc. You can, of course, say that their chosen words were in ill taste, but going after them themselves won't make you feel better. So, I'd suggest avoiding it.

Anyway, hope this helps!

[selinakylemybeloved]

my batfam music hcs:

not totally sure what kind of music dick would like. on one hand, i think he'd have a workout playlist of hyperpop. on the other hand i think he got really into shitty emo music as a teenager and still listens to it in adulthood. and also that man plays generic dad rock in the car.

babs would listen to video game soundtracks bc she knows they help with focus. i also saw a hc somewhere that she listens to indie pop and i agree with that.

jason pre-pit wouldn't have super strong opinions of music, he'd probably like showtunes (he would LOVE epic: the musical) and possibly some video game soundtracks. i think after the pit, he just likes music that expresses a lot of emotion. edm, rap, metal- doesn't matter, as long as it has a strong vibe and preferably a hint of edge.

tim listens to lo-fi study beat playlists on youtube and nothing else. he's the kind of person who 'doesn't listen to music.' steph has tried to get him to at least have preferences within lo-fi and he completely refuses.

steph listens to literally everything. like, everything. her playlist is hours of whiplash for everyone else. and she doesn't listen to everything in a doesn't-care way, she listens to anything genre-wise but is very invested in the artists that she pays attention to.

cass is a pop girlie through and through. she had a charli, chappell, and sabrina summer. i also think that she wouldn't care much about the lyrics of a song and would probably listen to a lot of music regardless of the language that it's in.

damian acts like he only likes classical music. he has been caught listening to anime openings, jazz, and dick's workout playlist. he denies this. it is unclear to everyone else why he's embarrassed about this.

duke likes most music in that he doesn't have that many strong preferences, but steph has desensitized him to enough music that he can enjoy whatever. he prefers rap and pop, tho.

bruce is a kpop fan

[wilhelminyard]

part 2 of the foxes insulting people to their face without giving a single fuck :

WYMACK :

"I'm not here to offer you kind words and pats on the back"

"some people are just hardwired to be stupid"

"neil is a walking tragedy" "you're a pretty pathetic sob story yourself"

NEIL :

"you make me uncomfortable because you don't make sense. I don't understand you"

"I can't stand you"

"I'm remembering why I don't like you"

"what I'd like is to put this phone through your teeth"

"you know, I get it. being raised as a superstar must be really, really difficult for you. always a commodity, never a human being, not a single person in your family thinking you're worth a damn off the court - yeah, sounds rough. kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless daddy issues all the time. I know it's not entirely your fault that you are mentally unbalanced and infected with these delusions of grandeur, and I know you're physically incapable of holding a decent conversation with anyone like evey other normal human being can, but I don't think any of us should have to put up with this much of your bullshit. pity only gets you so many concessions, and you used yours up about six insults ago. so please, please, just shut the fuck up and leave us alone."

"do you understand?" "yeah I understand you're a complete asshole"

"I can give you my number" "what for? [...] I wouldn't call you"

"you're not part of that family, remember? you're the cast-off"

"you are all insane"

"you are one seriously fucked-up individual"

ANDREW :

"kevin, kevin. so predictable. so pathetic."

"maybe he is afraid she'll die on him like the last woman he really loved"

"newsflash nicky: neil isn't normal" "this is beyond abnormal" "I am standing right here and I can hear you"

"you have this way of making people want to kill you"

"who am I supposed to call?" "nicky, coach, the suicide hotline, I don't care"

"you could occasionally grow a spine. I know it's a difficult concept for someone whose kneejerk reaction is to run away at the first sight of trouble, but try it sometime. you might actually like it."

"you don't have any room to judge other people's problems"

"sometimes you're interesting enough to keep around. other times you're so astoundingly stupid I can barely stand the sight of you"

"sometimes I forget you are sharper than you look"

"you and I both know you have a dreadful sense of humor so this can't be a joke"

KEVIN :

"hear that kevin? your sub said you're incompetent" "his opinion doesn't matter to me"

"you are a fucking idiot"

MATT :

"one day I want you to look up 'insensitivity' in the dictionary I'm sure it'll do your ego wonders to see your picture printed there beside it"

"would it kill you to smile when no one's paying you to?"

"no one wants you here"

AARON :

"I'm going to pretend I don't know you"

"we don't socialize with you"

DAN :

"we would make a drinking game out of it but we don't want to die of alcohol poisoning" "yeah that'd be a shame"

"I have serious concerns about your academic standings"

"hope you feel that one for a while you lowlife asshole"

NICKY :

"we all know kevin's as bratty as they come"

"*points at kevin* there's a sucker born every minute"

"shut up, sour face. save your grouching for the ride back and stop spoilinh our moment of glory"

"you can be a real jerk sometimes"

[a-dragons-explanations]

Not OP, so I hope they don’t mind me responding since you reblogged this off my (other) blog, but: But you don’t have to understand something for it to be real. Sexual attraction doesn’t make sense to a lot of asexual people; that doesn’t mean other people don’t experience it. Advanced astrophysics often doesn’t make sense to me; that doesn’t mean it isn’t a real and valid field of science. Something doesn’t have to make sense to you for someone else to experience it. That’s just the way the world works.

I guess my thing is: in my opinion, the default position you (general you, not you specifically) should hold when it comes to other people’s experiences and identities is that they’re real and as the person describes, and the person has the right to self-define. You should require evidence to move you away from that position - you shouldn’t require evidence to decide that that’s the case (unless and until you’ve encountered evidence that it’s either not genuine or inherently harmful in some way, at which point it becomes a matter of deciding which side has the better argument). This remains true even when your knee-jerk reaction is “but that doesn’t make sense” or even “ew gross” - a knee-jerk reaction does not evidence make.

Why does it feel like it’s not a choice to you? I don’t really understand how deciding whether or not you believe a group of people about their own experiences isn’t a choice, and I’d like to understand where you’re coming from better. And why does the existence of endogenic systems feel invalidating to you? (Genuine questions - I’m trying to open a dialogue here if you’re up for it, not yell at you or anything.)

hey, i saw a post on here saying you guys support non "traumagenic" systems and I was wanting to know if thats true.

You guys are so amazing and have helped me with my identity a lot, but this information is really important to me as a trauma survivor with severe PTSD. If you are pro endos but are open to listening to trauma survivors and phycology sources, I absolutely will provide them. I want you guys to be a safe space for people with PTSD and dissociative disorders so bad, as people who has OSDDDID tend to have more "contradictory" labels in the first place, due to the complex relationship all the different alters identities make combined.

I'm hoping so much that you'll be open to listening if this is true.

hello! i'm good, i don't need any!

if you only have severe PTSD and not a dissociative disorder and do not identify as plural, you should NOT be commenting on plurality at all. like i hate to break it to you, but if you do not deal with plurality, you do not know what the experience is like. reading papers about it will not give you insight into how people actually live.

i'm an inclusive Dissociative Identity Disorder system who is 100% pro endo, and any other type of system. i support ALL plurals, i don't cherry pick. you're correct, this blog is a safe space, especially for people with "contradictory" identities or ones that "don't make sense." why wouldn't i be here for endogenic and non traumagenic systems?

that would go against everything i stand for.

i am a trauma survivor as well. i *have* DID, i don't really need any resources on the matter- before I was diagnosed i spent years researching, and i still do keep up with research. i am aware that DID and OSDD are caused by trauma! generally it's severe, repeated trauma and/or neglect. i have no memories of my life before the age of 10. i too have severe PTSD, i have a diagnosis for C-PTSD in specific. i live with this every day of my life. i still have a lot of trauma and triggers. i black out and lose time and regularly forget who i am or where i'm at.

something to keep in mind is research on DID has literally 0 bearing on other types of plurality. just because there is a lot of research into DID, OSDD, etc. does not mean that other plural experiences do not exist. when ONLY siting medical sources and saying that because there's no other "proof" or "evidence" that other types of plurality "can't" exist, it's an appeal to authority. there is no research data to point toward because studies on DID and OSDD and other dissociative disorders have really only gained traction within the last 10 - 20 years maximum. this is an extremely recent phenomenon! just because there are no (paid, keep in mind that studies have to find funding, and investors are picky) medical papers or studies to point toward doesn't mean something isn't happening.

someone identifying as plural without trauma is not an affront to plurals who do have trauma. someone identifying as a system who doesn't have or know of any childhood trauma is not spitting in your face. i've seen this take around and it's just not it. don't take someone else's mental health as an attack on yours. it's not hurting you at all for people to identify as plural if they don't have trauma. it's not spitting in *my* face, so it's not spitting in yours, either. it's okay to let non traumagenic systems exist. it's not exacerbating your trauma or re-traumatizing you or subjecting you to new trauma.

they're not saying that your trauma is invalid just because they don't have any. i don't like people who get on a high horse because they have a dissociative disorder and act like they get to police how other people's brains work. you only know how your brain works. you do not know how any other type of system works.

endogenic systems are not identifying as endogenic to spite you or dissociative systems. they're not doing it to hurt you. they're doing it because they identify as multiple people. that is not being done with the intention to hurt anyone. this is about THEM, not you. nobody is the protagonist of the plural community. no one.

as a plural, myself, i get to choose who i support. and i choose to support people who aren't hurting anyone or doing anything wrong. i really don't care how offensive some people find non traumagenic systems, but they're not hurting you, me, or anyone else. live and let live. you don't know how someone else's brain works. you will never be able to know how someone else's brain works. accepting that will make your life easier.

being angry at other people for not having trauma will not make yours go away or undo what was done to you. you should never take out your frustrations on people who haven't hurt you. endos haven't hurt you, you just don't agree with them. these are 2 separate things. also you really don't have the right to comment on the nature of how complex non traumagenic plurality is or is not- endogenic systems can have just as many nuanced and complex identities regardless of whether or not they're dissociating. they're still multiple people whether or not you see them that way. they also have complex identities, why wouldn't they? being different people leads to a lot of complexity. you should still see them as multiple people even if you don't think it's legit. that's basic respect for another person who, again, literally hasn't hurt you.

also endogenic and non dissociative systems are still people, and we should still care about them. they're still people even if you don't agree with them, and again: they have not hurt you by virtue of existing.

hope that helps and makes sense. i am not open to changing my mind on this, but i appreciate you giving me a good reason to explain my stance on the matter. i don't have the right to police other people and tell them how their own brains work. you don't have that right, either. i'm not here to police anyone. that goes against everything i stand for. i don't gatekeep.

i'm not a cop.

[hxlxnaaa]

𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞

★ synopsis: haunted by your own loneliness, it seems the only cure is to create an imaginary friend

★ character: xavier

★ cw: first-person POV, angst if you squint, real world au, maybe ooc xavier? not really

★ word count: 1.6k

★ a/n: inspired by maladaptive daydreaming! strays so far from canon storyline obviously so this is hella HELLA au, but MC still has her heart problems lmao

When it comes to children, it isn’t surprising when you find out they have an imaginary friend. They’ll giggle, and their eyes will light up as they tell you about their talking dog, who has tea parties with them and rides on the back of their bike. Or the teddy bear that comes to life at night to tell them bedtime stories and help them count sheep.

Yet, eventually, the time comes where they grow up. No longer do talking dogs and dancing dolls follow them around, and the child won’t talk about their little friend anymore, leaving them behind. They fade from one’s memory, a ghost long forgotten…

But what if they don't?

What if they never grow out of their ‘imaginary friend’? What if it follows them all throughout their life? A schizo diagnosis would be in order, and years of therapy.

Sadly, that’s how it is for me; well, not the “seeing things and copious amounts of therapy” part.

He’s just… a coping mechanism.

A world to go to in my head when everything feels as if it’s crashing down. I don’t know where I’d be without him.

When I was small, no one seemed to enjoy my presence. I was always considered a nuisance with all of my heart problems. Making real friends was hard; people would up and leave after a few months, and I’d be alone again. I was a bother, in and out of doctors offices and never able to hang out. Texts would go ignored because I was too busy having tests run in cold hospital beds, hooked up to machines.

The nurses would joke with me, braid my hair and tell me gossip since I was in there so much – but it wasn’t the same as having friends my age that I can go to the movies with. So, when I finally came to the conclusion I’d be alone forever, I made a friend.

Yes, I made a friend.

I put all the qualities of my ideal friend in him; He was straight out of a cool, teen indie movie — the perfect boy next door. He would be the best friend you could go on long road trips with, get donuts with at ungodly hours in the morning. Quiet enough that I could talk for hours and he would just listen, but could still make me laugh with little remarks.

Since nobody else would talk to me, and I had far too much time on my hands, I would travel into my own little world in my head where he existed. I’d talk to him everyday, hang out with him for hours. Whether I was in class, the car, or laying in my bed staring at my ceiling, I’d dissociate into a world where someone truly, really cared about me.

This went on for years. No matter my problem, he’d always have a solution, no matter my opinion, he’d always listen. He was my knight in shining armor from bad dreams and boring moments.

Eventually, I put so much detail into him, it felt as if he was real.

I could practically reach out and touch his hair, know what it would feel like to run my fingers through his messy platinum hair. Pointing out every emotion in his blue eyes, from the joy that sparkled in them when I would tell him jokes that only he would understand, or when they clouded over with worry when I would come to him crying after a stressful day. The moments his angelic smile would let out his signature laugh that would ring in my ears for hours, and I could practically hear it in reality. Or the way I could cringe at him when he would act like an awkward dork, but his giggles made me grin, and I always put up with him. It’s almost as if I could smell the soft fresh laundry scent of him, feel his warm skin from sleep.

Sometimes, I could go months without thinking about the truth;

but sometimes, there were days it would hit me like a truck.

“You’re not real!” I’d cry. He’d be sitting on my bed with me. Reaching out his hand, I’d flinch away. “None of this is real Xavier! You’re not real, this world isn’t real. I’m stuck in this reality where everything is hell, and I have nothing.”

“Hey, I need you to breathe-” This would be one of those moments where I could read his eyes. They’re always so alive, you wouldn’t be able to tell it was all a dream I created in my mind. His electric eyes that would go dark with a whirl-wind of emotions. Sadness, worry, disappointment. It would always be like I could actually see him in front of me, and not like I would be staring at my ceiling sobbing in my bed;

Alone.

No matter what, I’d always forget reality again, and he always came crawling back. We’d pretend like none of it ever happened. Of course it worked, why wouldn’t it? I controlled everything. All of his moves, all of his words, every laugh that came out of his beautiful mouth. He was my puppet and this was my play, just an actor in this devastating work of theatre.

I’d find myself mentioning him without realizing.

“My brother nearly burned down the kitchen yesterday!” One of the girls in my classes had said, groaning and throwing her face in her hands.

I smiled, “I have a friend like that. His cooking skills are… well let's just say calling it ‘cooking’ might be a bit generous.”

They all wiggled their eyebrows, ‘Ooo,’ they’d say, ‘he? Come on, are you holding out on us!’ Laughter erupted around the table, and my cheeks flushed. My whole body lit up with embarrassment, turning red from head to toe.

That night I went home and threw myself into my room, locking my door and screaming at the top of my lungs. Choking out sobs, throwing whatever my frail, shaking hands could grab.

“He’s not real! He’s! Not! Real!” I chanted like a prayer, a prayer that he would just disappear from my mind and I could just be normal. I felt defeated; while my heart struggled, my mind was strained too. My whole world, my entire life revolved around a boy that didn’t exist.

After my breakdown and a shattering ego death, I came to the heart wrenching conclusion that it was time I got over all of this. I needed to grow up, focus on the life ahead of me. I was going to graduate highschool, I was going to go to school to achieve my dreams, I was chasing the life I always wanted.

All by myself.

I couldn’t live the rest of my life tucking myself away everytime life got hard, talking to someone that I made in my head.

I grieved him, mourning as if I had suffered the death of someone so close to me I couldn't bear to go on without him. Yet, with time, the wounds began to heal and the chronic, plaguing thoughts of him fleeted my head. I tucked him deep into a pocket of my mind I couldn’t access if I tried, just to keep myself safe from my own thoughts.

Thanks to all the attention I poured into my studies to distract myself from the emptiness of him being gone, I graduated with excellent grades and got into my first choice, the university of my dreams.

Walking down the campus sidewalk, I took a deep breath of the brand newness of everything. The cold fall air was putting hustle in everyone's strides on the first day of classes, and I mumbled a prayer that things would be different. Life would be different. Things wouldn’t be so lonely or empty anymore.

Trying to navigate my way around, someone bumped into me, almost knocking the both of us down.

They stumbled back, revealing a boy's shy smile, and a quiet chuckle that sounded like an angel's song you’d want to replay on repeat for the rest of your life; one I was all too familiar with.

“Oh, I should have looked where I was going, sorry-”

The boy trailed off and I couldn’t help but stare at him in awe.

The sparkling blue eyes, and his fluffy hair tousled around from the fall wind. The smile that could light a room, and a face that could melt thousands of hearts. He shone bright like a star. I thought if I breathed, or even blinked, he would disappear.

“Anyways, It’s my first day. Well, it’s everyone's first day, but it’s my first…first day. Does that make sense?” He frowned and his ears turned red, as met my eyes for the first time during the whole interaction.

I blinked, and let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, as he didn’t disappear, “Uh, yeah. It’s my first-first day too.”

The boy laughed, his shyness fading. He could laugh a million times, and I’d keep saying things to keep it going. I never wanted it to stop, I wanted to hear it until the moment I took my last breath.

“Well since it’s both of our first-first day, I guess I’ll be seeing you around campus a lot…” he paused, waiting for my name.

I whispered it so quietly, like it was a curse to speak it out loud. I wasn’t even sure he’d heard me, yet he nodded and softly smiled.

“It’s nice to meet you then. I’m Xavier.”

(divider by cafekitsune)

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I think it's clear Lion Guy has climbed AT LEAST to the top #2 on your fav twst characters list..... but do you think he'll ever surpass J word?? lately you've been rambling a lot abt Leona but tbh it's obvious you rlly rlly love Jade too from all the posts I've read abt your feelings towards him (which have helped me understand and appreciate him more, too!)

sorry if it's smth weird to ask btw, I know feelings/thoughts abt fictional characters sometimes can be pretty personal- so feel free to ignore this 🙇

For your reference, here is my personal Twst tier list ^^ It’s up to date as of the recent book 7 part 12 update. (And to be clear, the characters placed in the same tier are in no particular order; just because Silver is first in the "tolerate" tier doesn't mean I like him any more or less than Deuce, who is next in the row.)

If you’d like more specifics on why I do or don’t like a particular character, please check out my FAQ in the pinned post or look at #character opinion bingo. If the character you’d like me to elaborate on isn’t addressed there, then you may send in an ask about it.

Please remember to be respectful when discussing character preferences; do not attempt to convince others to change their minds or imply/tell them that they are “wrong” for feeling a certain way about a character.

I don’t mind the question! This blog’s a place for me to express myself (whether creatively or critically/more analytically) and to share my opinions on certain aspects of Twst ^^

I don't really think to put specific numbers on characters most of the time because I personally get really anxious about rankings 🤡 According to the same friends that said all of this though, they basically agree that L*ona is pretty much second place or that L*ona has already surpassed J word. A particular friend likes to joke that “it’s Leover”, and another one says, “it’s like Raven divorced J word for L*ona”. And honestly 💦💦 if I'm being 100% truthful, I'm a little scared myself that some cat boy I disliked back in 2020 will shoot right up to the very top 💀 When I think about that... OOooOoOooooOOOGH, IT REALLY GRINDS MY GEARS BECAUSE HE'D BE SO ANNOYING AND SMUG ABOUT WINNING FOR ONCE. Finally clawing his way up from rock bottom... past second place (where he was perpetually trapped for most of his life; second place to his older brother, second place to that lizard, second place to eel)... to snatch the crown from the jaws of defeat... 💢 (You can't see it, but I'm pounding the wall with my fists--)

BUT IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY GUYS (<- huffing copium) IT'S JUST THE CONTENT RELEASE BIAS... Like, L*ona has gotten SO much more focus recently that it might be a little unfair to compare the two right now??? He got that Nightmare Suit SSR and played an important role in the Halloween event, then immediately got his time to shine in his book 7 dream, on top of us being forced to go through all five Heartslabyul dreams with him. That's not even mentioning the fact that the Episode of Savanaclaw manga is hyping us up for his OB reveal in January, or his hometown event rerun that's currently going on in the JP server. I keep telling myself that as soon as J word gets a new exciting SSR or story content that I'll swing right back around to him 😭 He hasn't gotten anything substantial lately... And let's be honest here, L*ona has a complete advantage no matter what the situation is for J word simply because L*ona is a dorm leader and an OB boy. There will always be more attention and detail showered upon him and his development over J word's OTL There's just... more L*ona lore to chew on. The other part of it is a large chunk of what I discuss on this blog comes from interactions with my readers. If readers submit more asks about L*ona, then I'll naturally talk about him more. Pair this with the guarantee that he's getting more screen time because of the remaining Heartslabyul dreams, and it becomes constant lion reinforcement.

sdfhladiyofyfaey8gFP9MGEEGA ANyWAY, sorry if that didn't quite answer your question... I didn't want to give a definitive response because I can't really tell what will happen in the future but hey, you guys wouldn't think any less of me if something happens, right 🤡