#that's also the deer he's holding

[cepheusgalaxy]

doodle spam

[IDs: A few doodles of Angel Dust. In the first one, he puts on lipstick and wears a fancy pink dress, while looking a bit tired. In the second one, he is on his knees holding a beer can and smilling, and in the last one, he poses near a large circle that reads "Trust US with your entertainment" -VoxTek", and wears a simpy black outfit made of leather straps. /end ID.]

[starthecozy]

Rollerskater Steve 🛼 watch out, he's happily skating around with the cutest outfits ever (inspired by this bunny video)

[gravelsong]

Excitement canceled I'm going to go scream in the woods for a bit

[vesperione]

LOOK all im saying is if by some fucking miracle dread weight and the cinderellas castle digital ticket drops on the exact same day, i will exclusively combust because what the actual fuck.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

wait nobody move. nominee for worlds funniest ruina sprite

[tyrantchimeraart]

@mistystarshine apparently wrote a Hazbin hotel mermaid AU called The Drowning Time and there's a line that caught my attention. "If a human who’s done enough terrible things dies at sea, there’s a chance that they’ll come back to life as a siren..."

...so obviously I had to put way too much thought into what an Alastor mermaid would look like lol. Somehow settled on a Louisiana/American alligator as his mermaid base but, er.... but maybe that would make him a centaur instead?? IDFK lol. Added some fishy-fins to his limbs and ears to balance it out a bit.

[sparrowstarsandsorrow]

'The war is over for me now, but It'll always be there for the rest of my days, as im sure Elias will be.'

THEY FULL WELL KNEW WHAT THEY WERE INDICATING WHEN THEY GOT THE SHOT OF THE DEER! (I'll never recover from this) Even so, why would they not include the lines yet keep the deer, wouldn't it have been better to keep it in as so other will understand the meaning of the deer?

[munch-mumbles]

this thing is Freaking me out

[abstract-hellbender]

quick af btw >> you can hate dutch van der linde without calling him an evil snake who eats people..,,,, genuine serious if you think hes a cannibal GET OUT OF HERE

[creepyscritches]

I am. So happy. With how Stinky's naturally fleshed out into my yucky little boy from dark souls. A little shocking honestly how all our pawns talk to each other very similarly to how we talk to each other while gaming lmao... I always have rotting food or something unnecessary in my pockets

[cave-monkey]

Monkey King 2009 Episode 7

Huh. Is it just me or did they do something different with the animation this episode? More detailed faces? Additional expressions, maybe? The transitions aren't as smooth, but there seems to be...more there, somehow.

Anyway, in making up for the last two episodes I guess, this one is just fun. Ginseng Fruit is an absolute character. I'm not sure I like them, exactly, but then, neither is Stone Monkey, so there we go lol.

The monkeys being perfectly okay with random little guys clambering over them is one of my favorite things. They're immune to this sort of thing. Or like...mostly. We had a bit of a sample size this episode.

Marshal Ma: Immediately starts stress-scratching but makes zero effort to actually remove this weird little creature from his person. Marshal Liu has to rescue him.

Marshal Liu: Perfectly at ease with this weird little not-monkey hanging off of him. Cool as a cucumber. An absolute pro. A Dad, even.

Stone Monkey: GET IT OFF

(Stone Monkey succumbed to the inevitable and let Ginseng Fruit clamber over him and go on rides as they please eventually, but also they WILL get slung into the stratosphere if they can't hang on and Stone Monkey doesn't see how that is any of their concern. Train that grip or die, little buddy.)

They were trying to endear the four generals to us in the beginning of the episode too, I just know it, but I am holding strong. They need to properly apologize at this point before they get ANY slack. That said, them actually trying to do their jobs (to varying degrees of success) and actively looking out for their exhausted troop, was pretty all right. Sure, the fact that they can't manage to figure out how to man sustainable defenses without running their forces into the ground before any battle or siege even has a chance to start isn't good, but we already know they aren't great at their jobs and that's probably meant to be the point. Maybe a nod to how frequently Flower Fruit Mountain got into deep shit without Monkey King in the actual book.

And, okay, if the Demon King had actually been testing their defenses during this time, I'd cut them some slack, but we know he wasn't. He was busy fumigating his house and losing to fruit babies. He has a life outside of you!

Also, General Ba not even pretending to be doing anything besides shit-stirring was kind of funny.

Them not immediately letting on that they know exactly who Stone Monkey is was...probably cool of them, though? Not throwing the kid under the bus of this total stranger. Or they were just messing with Ginseng Fruit because they could. They're monkeys, Ginseng Fruit is Dramatic; maybe it was just too tempting to resist the mischief. Or they just wanted to pretend Stone Monkey didn't exist for awhile! The possibilities are endless.

Stone Monkey gets woken up from a nap and immediately chooses violence against random infants. (He is going to regret that.)

Hilarious how, so long as they were arguing and Ginseng Fruit was insulting him, Stone Monkey was perfectly happy to hang around, but as SOON as they start loudly praising him to the heavens, he panics and runs for the hills. Relatable. Little does he know, no one will ever reach Ginseng Fruit escape velocity. You are friends now, Stone Monkey. The choice was never yours. Face loss with dignity. (He does not. I haven't really felt the need to share screenshots in awhile, but this whole episode has me wanting to, because Stone Monkey's faces while Ginseng Fruit ran him down were great. Boy was struggling.)

But also, wow, he really does like his friends a little mean, doesn't he? Stone Monkey has a type, and Ginseng Fruit is not it. Good thing Ginseng Fruit has decided this isn't their problem.

Speaking of, I was gonna make a comment about Six Ears being inexplicably missing again for an entire half an episode, but turns out Stone Monkey was going to visit Jade Rabbit this whole time, so, you know. I guess that's their go-to excuse now for when they need a reason Six Ears and Stone Monkey aren't attached at the hip? Last time they just had to do it and hope no one noticed. (We noticed.)

Also I'm sure Six Ears being left totally alone while the Demon King and Company were screaming about flattening Flower Fruit Mountain in the beginning of the episode isn't going to lead to any unfortunate circumstances.

AWWW. Jade Rabbit protected Stone Monkey! She's got him tucked behind her when she goes after Ginseng Fruit, and even more notably, Stone Monkey stays there. I'm pretty sure Ginseng Fruit traumatized him. The Demon King wishes he had what Ginseng Fruit has. Literally. (Also also...so Stone Monkey SEES the crater left from where she went after Ginseng Fruit and even makes a 'wow I almost witnessed a murder. wow I might STILL witness a murder' face while Ginseng Fruit is held at wand-point but...says nothing to vouch for this kid. Leaves them to fend for themself entirely. Cold, Stone Monkey.) (He will also come to regret that.)

Jade Rabbit's really a, uh, 'kill them all, let Someone sort it out, maybe' kind of a girl, huh? Shoot first, ask questions never. She is out for BLOOD. That rock VAPORIZED. That's a nice little warm-up for what she wants to do to another, somewhat monkier shaped rock. She really went from ':)' to 'MURDER' in .2 seconds flat, and that is not an exaggeration.

And, look, she's going for Stone Monkey's entire, literal life almost immediately after this, but backing up I have to say that Stone Monkey's embarrassed/apologetic smile and Jade Rabbit's answering embarrassed smile while Ginseng Fruit did their thing was so cute. They're cute.

And then Jade Rabbit's slow death glare over her shoulder.

[insert boss music]

Run.

(Stone Monkey's blank Default Smile Face when he dodges Jade Rabbit's first murder attempt is also extremely funny. He is having a day today.) (This episode is so funny.)

And don't let me forget to mention!

Appreciation for the fact that, even while running for his life and still actively being pursued by divine vengeance, Stone Monkey is 100% ready to switch gears over to Gotta Rescue Six Ears mode on a dime.

But also: What are the chances?

Just glances casually to the left while sprinting away from a Murder Rabbit shooting death beams and, oh, hey, there's Six Ears getting MOBBED just down that hill! What a coincidence!

Like, not only do we find Six Ears surrounded by enemy soldiers like they're iron shavings and he's the magnet in a kid's science demonstration, but they somehow managed to find him in the MIDDLE of a RANDOM PART OF THE MOUNTAIN, presumably NOWHERE NEAR the main body of the troop considering how close they are to the Forbidden Forest, with Six Ears probably not having been doing anything but minding his own business and taking a nap away from the noise or whatever else it is he does when off by himself, like, not only this, but also Stone Monkey manages to run right into them.

Quick, what do you think is more powerful? Six Ears's 'Designated Damsel' danger magnet aura or Stone Monkey's inexplicable ability to cut a straight line toward him at any given moment of duress?

Jokes aside, Six Ears was holding his own pretty well, though! Stone Monkey's coming in like an irate comet in a few seconds, so he'll definitely be fine unless the Demon King manages to grab him as a shield and run first, but Six Ears managed to hold out against most of them by himself! Pretty sure he killed a dude, too? Ehhh I'm sure it's fine. He's doing a good job! He shouldn't beat himself up too much for needing help! (He's definitely going to beat himself up too much.)

...Oh, hey! It occurs to me that Jade Rabbit and Six Ears are almost in sight of each other.

!!!

Let them be friends.

Or the pettiest of mortal enemies. I feel like that could work too, but also that those are probably the only two options.

[ragingtwilight]

Just shot chocolate milk all over my kitchen by coughing while trying to take some meds

Im sick atm and my partner was telling me a joke right when i took the sip & that alone almost made me lose it, then i was thinking of a joke i was gonna shoot back at him after BUT THEN i burst into a fuckin coughing fit mouth full of chocolate milk and had to search the remains for my medications

I was doomed the moment i took that sip tbh

[sesamenom]

The elves of Lothlorien are absolutely analogous to wolves. Amdir, for one, is a possible Doriath survivor who brought a massive army to the Dagorlad and died in the charge. Amroth led a host of the Sindar in the War of Elves and Men, and later succeeded in besieging Angmar. Galadriel kinslayed on the side of the Teleri and led the Host over the Helcaraxe!

However, the elves of Third Age Lothlorien are more like vaguely-human-accustomed nature park wolves. They're still just as creepy and terrifying (Galadriel's whole Lady Of The Golden Wood sorceress legend is definitely A Thing, to the point where even neighboring kingdoms refuse to believe that she's actually pretty nice), plus the fact that they live smack dab in the middle of the crossroad between Moria, Dol Guldur, and Isengard, but the older Doriathrim have mostly figured out methods of communication that do not involve violence, and the younger generations are generally pretty welcoming to established friends. If you're a stranger, they don't seem that much different from regular wolves, but if you're a regular visitor of that particular nature park, they probably won't mind you pointing and staring a bit from the pathway, provided you aren't aggressive about it.

Modern fantasy seems to have shifted to a midpoint between Quendi and garden-gnome elves, with the "enlightened vegetarian" vibe. Personally, I am of the belief this is at least partially, if not mostly, due to the fact that superficial pop culture only really views the heavily selection-biased late-TA elves, where the really violent ones are dead, dead, and extremely extra dead, and the remaining ones have spent the past ten thousand years learning (mostly through trial and error, it seems) problem-solving methods that include zero kinslaying and minimal screaming.

In the context of the wolf-dog analogy in relation to Middle-Earth and the greater Legendarium, the YT and First Age elves are the wolves, fell and fey, with white fire in their eyes and blood on gleaming blades, who have slain great beasts of fire and iron and fear no Shadow. The kinslayers are even moreso these wild monsters of legend, coming unto a great city in the night and leaving only blood and embers in their wake, whose cruel servants steal away children in the night.

The Second Age elves have mellowed a bit, like wolves that have learned to exist in the same general region as humans. They are just as fierce, but they concern themselves mostly in their own matters, and keep to their long-established territories. When unbothered, they are willing to open dialogues of trade or diplomacy, but little could save the Enemy from the face of their wrath, lingering ever-present under the skin of the Exiles.

By the Third Age, all those inclined to war are long-dead, save the few most powerful of their kind. There are small pockets where those ancient elves still dwell, but they are reserved to the point of being near-mythical in some regions. Hobbits tell tales of the Elf they swear the great-aunt's fourth cousin once saw in the Old Forest in much the same way people argue whether the animal the neighbor's grandfather saw crossing a suburban yard was a wandering wolf or a coyote. The Rohirrim warn of the fey Lady of the Wood, who none, they say, have laid eyes upon and yet lived, and the people of Gondor sing of the mighty deeds of the Elves, lamenting that urban sprawl has diminished the strange woods in which the Elves once dwelt.

The few Elves who are not feared are the wisest and kindest of all, akin to a particularly friendly wolf who hunts alongside its spear-wielding allies, an ambassador of its kin. Being the most visible in the records of Men, they become the most well-remembered of elves as peaceful and generous, who more readily take up pens than swords, and who hunt for food more than sport. These records distort to the modern assumption of "enlightened vegetarians", while the seldom-encountered folk of Lorien and Mirkwood Sail and Fade away.

Peredhel are rare beyond measure, with less than ten true peredhel known to date. They are strange to both kinds, more frail than a true elf, far more powerful than a Man, and uniquely gifted in entirely new ways. There are some claimed "half-elves" who perhaps had some Numenorean heritage two thousand years ago and just happen to be unnaturally tall and sharp-eyed, but they can still be firmly categorized as Men, albeit of a unique appearance.

True half-elves, though, cannot be easily classed as either. They are like to wolfdogs of very recent ancestry, tall and powerful yet sleek, eyes just different enough to be uncanny. They are swift and strong, not truly hampered by physical possibility, but they are still bound to Arda, their bodies and spirits just as secure in Middle-Earth as they are in Aman. They do not Fade, but they still bear the weight of mortal weariness; they are suited for both worlds and none. Their eyes are bright with inhuman fire, shining with the force of the Sun and the cold of the Moon, but it is not the light of the Flame Imperishable behind them: it is something entirely their own. They are their own type of being: the Line of Luthien, the Peredhel, the Sons of Elrond.

Random story thought: What if a fantasy story where there's humans and elves, who are less like different nationalities and/or "human, but in a different font", but more like the difference between dogs and wolves? Like they resemble humans, but are very, very clearly not human. And half-elves, like wolfdogs, are known to be theoretically possible, but so improbable and rare that they might as well be a myth. Like everybody's school had that one kid who loves lying for attention who keeps insisting that they actually know somebody who's a real half-elf for real.

And in the extremely rare case where their friend of a friend who's "totally actually a real half-elf" even exists at all, 99 times out of 100, the aforementioned suspected hybrid is just a 100% full human who's unusually tall, beautiful and autistic. Something that can definitely fool someone who's never seen a real half-elf, and is willing to believe that this friend's mom actually for real fucked an elf (instead of getting hunted for sport, and possibly eaten, which is the more likely outcome of encountering elves in the wild). But it's almost always just a full human with vaguely 'elvish' features.

But once in a blue moon, there actually is a real half-elf, and once you've seen one, you won't mistake a full human for one of them again. They're gangly, not just tall but long-limbed in a way that humans are not, their speech is strangely composed as if they learned their first language as a second language, and their eyes are piercing, wild, inhuman eyes, with a gaze full of strange instinctive wisdom that humans were never meant to know. Secret elvish thoughts that even they, personally, wish they didn't have.

And it sinks in to you that elves, that are so alien to you, would also find this poor creature just as strange and unsettling as you do.

[chekov-in-a-dress]

For the first time in my life I have a pet and my brain does not know how to handle this lmao I'm sitting here crying just holding this stupid baby's head as he sleeps

[clownboy-yeehonk]

Personally I think Sleep No More was enhanced by the panicked dash across midtown Manhattan thanks to nj transit running over an hour late, I made it with 5 minutes to spare drenched in sweat, managed to chug a champagne cocktail before immediately being shoved into the fully immersive Macbeth/hitchcock inspired haunted house/hotel it was v neat would recommend I'm gonna have nightmares about this one fo sho

[administer-distractions]

FOUND A LIL GARTER SNAKE WHILE WALKING IN THE PARK TODAY