#that's /deeply/ hilarious in a very specific way

[mitocamdria]

Carmy is a serial plotter

So I wanted to do this post to serve as a sort of compilation of proof that Carmy puts serious thought into his plans to spend time or hoard the possessions of the people he romantically desires. This theory is so fascinating to me because it adds another intriguing layer of personality to the tormented and talented chef we all have come to love. To layout the evidence I’ll break it down by season.

Season 1:

I think we actually get the first sign that Carmy plots when he texts Syd before opening Mikey’s letter. After he states his behavior was not ok, he tells Syd that her check is ready for her to come get whenever.

Now please correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it more customary that a final check be mailed to a former employee, especially if the employee and employer are not in the most cordial of relationships, which at that time they were very much not. Or Carmy could have asked if Syd would like to come in to retrieve the check or have it mailed. But no, Carmy specifically says she needs to come to the restaurant to get it. I think this was Carmy’s way of ensuring he could see her at least one last time to try and convince her to come back, even before they found the tomato can money (that money certainly helped his plan).

Season 2:

One of the first metas that came about suggesting that Carmy formulates plans in lieu of just communicating his feelings is from @fairestbeard and can be read here. It brilliantly lays out how Carmy is the one whom purposefully messed up the lacto ferment he and Syd were working on in order to be able to make the suggestion that they essentially go on a food tour date which Carmy failed to do previously in front of the lockers at The Bear. There’s also evidence that Carmy purposefully moved his Chef coat to his kitchen where he knew Syd was going to be which eventually led to him gifting her the Thom Browne Chef coat.

Season 3:

Ever Dinner

So I think there may already be meta written about this but I can’t find a specific post about it so definitely let me know of any existing meta.

Carmy made a plan to ask Syd to the Ever Funersl dinner ahead of time, indicated by the fact that Carmy awkwardly starts the conversation with “We’re closed tomorrow night” seemingly in the hopes to steer the conversation towards the Ever dinner. Once he realizes he has an opening he makes an obviously pensive expression and then shoots his shot.

Syd’s Scrunchie

There’s been a lot of speculation that the scrunchie Carmy has on his dresser is Sydney’s. Sydney is the only character to consistently wear scrunchies when she’s not working in the restaurant. So therefore I think Carmy had to have taken it one of the times she was in his apartment. Or maybe Syd had one in the restaurant lying around somewhere accessible to Carmy.

This theory is really interesting because it would be easy enough for Camry to just give the scrunchie back to Sydney if he innocently came across it but the fact that he’s hoarding it shows that he is holding onto it because he loves her deeply.

Season 4:

Now this season is where the plotting gets heavy. @freedelusionshere was one of if not the first to come up with the idea that it was Carmy that took Syd’s cleaver (post here) and @hamachibloodmagic reblogged with photo evidence that Syd indeed used her cleaver around Carmy shortly before it went missing (reblog here).

@thoughtfulchaos773’s meta detailing how Carmy lies is explored in great detail here and also provides evidence that Carmy hoarded Claire’s green sweater which also serves as proof that Carmy probably took Syd’s cleaver.

I find it hilarious that when Sydney tells Carmy she lost her cleaver, instead of offering help to find it (which would be the normal and expected response), Carmy immediately asks her if she needs a new cleaver. CARMY BE PLOTTING. It’s definitely implied Carmy is going to engage in another grand gift giving gesture towards Syd, because that is what Carmy does when he realizes he can actually provide something Sydney wants or needs, like with the chef coat. Only this time, Carmy TAKES the object so that he can replace it, probably with one that is high end or with significant sentimental value.

Significance

What does all of this prove? Carmy is very aware of his feelings for Syd. There has still been some speculation within this community as to whether or not Carmy is aware that he is deeply in love with Syd and the fact that Carmy plots in order to get closer to her is evidence he does these things intentionally.

He even so much as calls himself a “psycho” when he is stuck in the walk in and questions why he ever thought he could be in a relationship. On surface level, none of Carmy’s actions up to that point would be any that anyone would call psychopathic. Which leads me to believe he is very much aware that he plots and I think that is the psycho behavior to which he is referring. And due this realization, Carmy deflects and sabotages his plans because he believes he is unworthy of Syd’s love.

Perhaps the cherry on top to these revelations is that it only proves further that Carmy and Sydney are soulmates. Because we all know this story starts with Sydney’s plot to come and work for the chef who made the best meal of her life and lies to Carmy about why she’s there. These two are so afraid of open communication that they rely on elaborate plans they’ve made in order to get closer to the other. If that’s not soulmatism, I don’t know what is.

[steamberrystudio]

hey Esh! it occurred to me this morning to wonder -- lol, what would happen if one of the LIs of WSC got bored on duty and decided to try "yelling" really loud mentally to see if they could get wil's attention at a distance? I imagine the empaths among us might have the best chances of success, although Asher sneak a win in there somewhere. I'm thinking it's either a deeply hilarious failure or Wil ends up dropping something out of nowhere like "GAH!" and looks totally crazy 😂

I won't get into who might succeed and who would not because honestly that's a bit of a spoiler...

BUT in terms of whether Wil would be startled, it depends a lot. Operating at their normal skill level (so not including the period of time right after they woke up where their abilities were erratic and they didn't have mental barriers in place) they wouldn't get a sudden YELL in their mind, but more of a quiet prickle.

It's a bit like an automatic defence that stops incoming thoughts from bursting in and freaking you out.

The only way you'd get startled, usually, is if a stronger telepath busted through the barriers like the kool-aid man to yell at you. The one time this doesn't apply is when a message is being fuelled by extreme desperation or panic or another strong emotion. In that case, even less adept people can let out a mental scream that telepaths hear as a startling scream. But that is a very specific situation.

To answer the question - no one on the crew is likely able to mentally "yell" and startle Wil just out of boredom. When it comes to people just THINKING in Wil's direction to send a message, various characters are better or worse at sending something intelligible. But that will get explored later in the story.

[thatonegrimm]

HI! OKAY SO 🙏🏻✨

I heard you were taking requests Ψ( ｀▽´ )Ψ perhaps perhaps if you have the time and if you feel like its (no pressure ofc!) you could write something on the reader being obsessed with the saja boys ? (`･ω･´)

And like i mean obsessed obsessed 🙏🏻✨ not sasaeng level obsessed but like really weirdly into them type :DD

Take it however as you will ><!! You have full creative liberty and anything and all in between!!

Have a wonderful day!! Please don’t go bald!! /pos

（๑✧∀✧๑）✨

OKAY SO—this request?? Absolutely unhinged in the best possible way. 😭🙏🏻✨ “Not sasaeng, just… deeply weird about them” is such a specific and hilarious vibe and I LOVE it. Thank you for the request—and for the “don’t go bald” blessing LMAOO Here you go!💌

🌙The Reader Is... Weirdly Into the Saja Boys

 You’re not a sasaeng. You’re just very dedicated to loving your boys.…They’re not ready.

------------------------------------

🧿 Jinu

You didn’t mean for him to find it.

He was looking for a phone charger. Opened the wrong drawer. Then another. Then—

“What… is this?”

You froze.

It was the Jinu drawer.

Inside: Printed photos, a miniature plushie that suspiciously resembled him, a labeled ziplock bag with "Jinu's tissue (used???)", and a handwritten tag that said “Blue is your color 🥺💙” in glitter pen.

He turned slowly to look at you. “Is this… evidence?”

You choked. “It’s a scrapbook!”

He held up a sticker sheet with cartoon versions of him saying ‘you’re doing amazing sweetie.’

You grabbed it. “That’s limited edition!”

He was blushing. Hard. “You… really like me.”

You panicked. “Don’t flatter yourself. I also have a drawer for Abby—”

“WHAT?!”

------------------------------------

💪 Abby

You ask casually, “So you’re doing chest and back today, right?”

Abby freezes mid-sip of protein shake. “How’d you know that?”

You blink. “You alternate it with arms and core. You did legs Monday, so it’s obvious.”

He stares.

You continue: “Also you always play the same playlist when you’re squatting. Something about training like a dragon king?”

“…Are you tracking my workouts?”

You shrug. “I like knowing what you’re doing.”

He blushes. “Babe. That’s weird. And also… kinda flattering? But mostly weird.”

Later, you text him:

YOU GOT THIS 💪✨ BE THE DRAGON KING

He doesn’t respond.

But you do hear him whisper it before his next deadlift.

------------------------------------

📚 Mystery

He casually mentions a bad vibe in the morning and you immediately say:

“Oh, was it a reversed Ten of Swords again?”

He freezes.

“…How do you know that?”

You look away. “I don’t.”

“You do.”

You fumble. “Maybe I have a… tracking spreadsheet.”

“A what?”

He flips open your notebook. Finds tabs labeled ‘Mystery’s Mood Swings,’ ‘Card Pull History,’ and ‘Cursed Thursdays.’

He looks at you. No judgment. Just mild awe.

“You’ve been keeping records?”

“I just wanna understand you better,” you mumble.

He closes the book slowly. Sets it down.

“…You’re terrifying,” he says softly. “I think I like it.”

------------------------------------

💋 Romance

Romance stumbles across your notebook by accident. Not a journal. Not a planner.

A fic notebook.

Labeled:

“My Demon BF, Romance 💋 AU #3: CEO of Hell, Softboy on Weekends”

He opens it.

Reads.

Keeps reading.

Reads some more.

“…You made me a CEO?” he says, breathless.

You die inside. “Give that BACK—”

“*Wait—*I have a motorcycle?!”

You lunge for it. He sidesteps with the grace of someone who’s just realized he’s the star of a fictional masterpiece.

“Oh my GOD,” he gasps. “You gave me a tragic backstory and a dual-colored eye?!”

“STOP READING—”

“Do I have a scar? Please tell me I have a scar.”

You scream into a pillow.

He clutches the notebook to his chest.

“I would die for this version of me.”

He does not let you delete it.

Ever.

------------------------------------

🔥 Baby

You have a fan account.

Not a stan account.

A burner. Under a fake name.

@ hellfirebaby96.

You post daily updates. Edits. Speculation threads. Fan theories about his demon mark. You once made a thread titled:

“25 Reasons Why Baby Could Beat Satan in a Fistfight”

It went viral.

One day, Baby walks into the room while you’re making a post. He leans over. Squints.

“…Are you talking about me?”

You immediately close the app.

He stares.

“Did you just... write a 4k caption on why I’d ‘turn Hell into a ramen shop out of spite?’”

“…no?”

He grins. Too wide. “So you’re the reason my hashtags are insane.”

You blink. “You’re not mad?”

He pulls out his phone and follows your account.

Then reposts your thread with:

“#26: I’d do it to impress her.”

------------------------------------

M-List

[grubus]

Hi! do you have any svsss fic recs? I really like syonr and I'm curious about what you like to read!

*rubs hands together*

Alright alright. Now some of these are probably already well known, but still!!

I make no secret of this, but as Prim is my favorite author and very cool friend, I will HAPPILY recommend these first;

Masochism is probably THE qijiu fic of all time, absolutely adore it. It's set in their disciple era, with YQY just grabbing at whatever scraps he can even as SQQ tries to push the boundaries and see what will make him BREAK. So, so good. Happy ending!

Tarnished Gold is my favorite original Binghe fic, and I hope more people give it a chance. I think the summary scare some but it's GREAT! I love it! Binghe's thought process, the way someone perceives SY as GYX from an outside perspective, and omg LPM is such a great character in it...

of course I recommend basically everything Prim writes.

(Shen Yuan Voice) It's not gay if- by Nachtofthedead is porn. Just straight up modern time BingYuan porn. It is filthy and great and *thumbs up* love it. Bingge decides to play along with SY's delulu thoughts on gayness and everyone are happy.

The Many Trials and Tribulations of Ming Fan by The Feels Whale (miscellea) is great and I think often overlooked. A oneshot from MF's point of view on how to handle SQQ's wife beam, deeply funny to me. They also wrote-

Dust and Broken Grains , which is basically "Binghe discovers early that Crying Works" and it becomes a fix-it fic. but there's more to it than that!!! Love it a lot.

Celestial Afterglow by elanor_pam is just. So good. SO GOOD. It's hilarious, it uses the System in a way few fics ever does and it has me cackling every time I read it.

What Is Seen by CaveteDracones is a fix-it with a side of whump fic, where SQQ's trial at HHP goes VERY differently. Truth serum! Torture! System Reveal! Yay!

Dual Cultivate or Date by acernor is THE BingLiuShen fic out there. Adore it. I'm sure many have already appreciated it, but it doesn't hurt to remind others that it exists!

A Child Once by Tossawary is a very, very good BingQiu and MoShang fic, and I honestly love not only BingQiu being forced to play parents, but also the MobeiBing friendship? Great, amazing. All the relationships in this is great, and I know most have heard of Tossawary but if you haven't given this specific fic a chance you SHOULD.

easy fix by airplanelanding (TheCourtSorcerer) is a smutty cumplane oneshot, where they are friends with benefits (approved by their husbands) for whenever said husbands are unavailable for Dual Cultivation Cure. This fic just really captures the snark and is also *chefs kiss*

with the tail of the snake by tciddaemina is a very, very good monsterfucker!SQQ fic where Binghe became a dragon in the abyss. I LOVE IT. It's a WIP, but *clenches fist* it's just so good. Soft and gooey and so HHHH yes good. I would probably put all their svsss fics in here but I am running out of time!!

.... but I have enough time to recommend my other favorite fic from them, which isn't even svsss! And is how I found them to begin with!

come all ye mighty is a Solo Leveling fic! It's Igris/Jinwoo, from Igris' pov, and I love the world building in it. As they say in the author's notes, it's a little bit of an au since it doesn't follow the original plot of the comic, but I reread this so, so often. 10/10, if you like solo leveling at all please give it a go I BEG OF YOU.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

A Democratic media strategy to save journalism and the nation

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/12/12/the-view-from-somewhere/#abolish-rogan

As unbearably cringe as the hunt for a "leftist Joe Rogan" is, it is (to use a shopworn phrase), "directionally correct." Democrats suck at getting their message out, and that exacts a high electoral cost.

The right has an extremely well-funded media ecosystem of high-paid bullshitters backed by algorithm-gaming SEO dickheads. This system isn't necessarily supposed to turn a profit or even break even: the point of Prageru isn't to score ad revenue, it's to ensure that anyone who googles "what the fuck causes inflation" gets 25 minutes of relatable, upbeat, cheerfully sociopathic Austrian economics jammed into their eyeballs. Far right news isn't a for-profit concern, it's a loss-leader for oligarch-friendly policies. It's a steal: a million bucks' worth of news buys America's ultra-rich a billion dollars' worth of tax-cuts and the right to maim their workers and poison their customers for profit.

Meanwhile, the Democrats have historically relied on the "traditional media" to carry their messages, on the ground that reality has a well-known leftist bias, so any news outlet that hews to "journalistic ethics" will publish the truth, and the truth will weigh in favor of Democratic positions: trans people are humans, racism is real, abortion isn't murder, housing is a market failure, the planet is on fire, etc, etc, etc.

This is a stupid policy, and it has failed. The "respectable" news media hews to a self-imposed code of "balance" and "neutrality" that is easily gamed: "some people say that Hatians don't eat pet dogs, some people do, let's report both sides!" This is called "the view from nowhere" and it gets Democrats precisely nowhere:

http://archive.pressthink.org/2008/03/14/pincus_neutrality.html

Balance and neutrality are bullshit, an excuse that has been so thoroughly weaponized by billionaires and their lickspittles that anyone who takes it seriously demonstrates comprehensively that they, themselves, are deeply unserious:

https://www.techdirt.com/2024/12/10/la-times-billionaire-owner-hilariously-thinks-he-can-solve-media-bias-with-ai/

Press neutrality – the view from nowhere – isn't some eternal verity. In terms of the history of the press, it's an idea that's about ten seconds old. The glory days of the news were dominated by papers with names like The Smallville Democrat and The Ruling Class Republican. Most of the world boggles at the idea that a news outlet wouldn't declare its political posture. Britons know that the Telegraph is the Torygraph; that the Guardian is in the tank for Labour (and specifically, committed to enabling Blairite/Starmerite purges of the left); the Mirror is a leftist tabloid; and the Mail is so far right that its editorial board considers Attila the Hun "woke."

Writing for The American Prospect – an excellent leftist news outlet – Ryan Cooper proposes a solution to the Democratic media gap that's way better than the hunt for the elusive "leftist Joe Rogan": sponsoring explicitly Democrat news outlets:

https://prospect.org/politics/2024-12-12-democrats-lost-propaganda-war/

The country is a bleak landscape of news deserts where voters literally didn't hear about what Trump was saying he would do, and, if they heard about it, they didn't hear from anyone who could explain what it meant. The average normie voter doesn't know what a "tariff" is, and chances are they think it's a tax that other countries inexplicably pay for the privilege of selling very cheap things to Americans.

Ironically, this news desert is also a crowded field of hungry, unemployed, talented journalists. What if Dems funded free newsgathering and publication in news deserts that told the truth? What if these news outlets, by dint of being an explicitly partisan, party-subsidized project, refused to adopt all the anti-reader practices of other websites, like disgusting surveillance, intrusive advertising, AI slop, email-soliciting pop-ups, and all the other crap that makes the news worse and worse every day?

Cooper recounts how this was actually tried on a small scale, to modest good effect, when the Center for American Progress subsidized Thinkprogress, an explicitly leftist news outlet. This was going great until 2019, when corporate Dems and their megadonors killed it because Thinkprogress had the temerity to report on their corrupt dealings:

https://www.thedailybeast.com/thinkprogress-a-top-progressive-news-site-is-shutting-down/

And, Cooper points out, this isn't what happens with far-right subsidy news. Right wing influencers, personalities and writers can stray pretty far from the party line without getting shut down.

I love the idea of a disenshittified, explicitly political leftist Democratic news media. Imagine a newsroom whose purpose is to get its message repeated as widely as possible. It wouldn't have a paywall – it would be Creative Commons Attribution-only, allowing for commercial republication by anyone who wants to reprint it, so long as they link back to it. It wouldn't wring its hands over AI ingestion or whether a slop site that rewrote its articles got to the top of Google News. That's fine! If the point is to get people to understand your point of view – and not to attract clicks or eyeballs – other people repackaging your content and finding ways to spread it is a feature, not a bug.

Back in the Napster Wars, entertainment industry shills – like Hillary Rosen, who oversaw a campaign to sue tens of thousands of children before becoming a major Democratic Party power-broker – used to tell us that "you can't compete with free." That's not entirely true, but it's not entirely false, either. If your news is a loss-leader for a democratic society that addresses human flourishing and a habitable planet, then you can make that news free-as-in-speech and free-as-in-beer, and avoid all the suckitude that makes reading "real" news so fucking garbage.

For the past five years, I've been publishing a newsletter – this thing you're reading now – that has no analytics, ads, tracking, pop-ups, or other trash. As a writer, it's profoundly satisfying and liberating, because all I have to care about is whether people engage with my ideas. I literally have no idea how many people read this, but I know everything people say about it.

That's how the news worked back in the good old days that everyone says we need to return to. Writers and editors measured the success of a story based on how the public reacted to it, not based on clicks or metrics that told you how far someone scrolled before they gave up on it. The supposed benefits of "data-driven" editorial policy have not materialized – the "data-driven" part is the search for an equilibrium between how surveillant and obnoxious a website can be and your decision to stop reading it forever.

Outlets like Propublica have done well by adopting much of this program, albeit without any explicit leftist agenda (the fact that they seem leftist reflects nothing more than their commitment to reporting the truth, e.g., Clarence Thomas is a lavishly corrupt puppet of billionaires who've showered him with riches).

The fact that they've been as successful as they are on a national beat – and partnering with the scant few regional papers to do some local coverage – just proves the point. The Democratic Party doesn't need its own Joe Rogan – they need a nationwide network of local outlets, sponsored by the party, committed to never enshittifying, bringing relevant, timely news to a nation in desperate need of it.

[flwrkid14]

imagine if Tim’s rogues/villains (lady shiva, cat woman, riddler, ra’s, etc) are the only ones who remember his birthday? Like they’d break into the bat cave or JL meeting to gift him smth or just to wish him happy birthday. That’d be sad and depressing but also funny and cute ig.

thank you so much for this ask, anon !! it’s the perfect mix of funny and quietly heartbreaking — which honestly just is the Tim Drake experience. like of course his villains would remember his birthday. of course Lady Shiva would casually drop into the Batcave with a perfectly wrapped gift while everyone else forgets. it’s tragic. it’s hilarious. it’s weirdly endearing. and now I can’t stop thinking about it T-T

Tim doesn’t expect anyone to remember.

And look, that’s not some martyr thing. He’s not fishing. He’s not being dramatic. It’s just—everyone’s busy. Bruce is halfway across the galaxy playing interstellar Batman. Dick’s working double shifts in Blüdhaven. Cass and Steph are off-grid. Damian is... somewhere. Probably stabbing something.

Alfred would’ve remembered, but he’s in Zurich for that symposium on bullet wound triage. Because of course he is.

So Tim spends most of his nineteenth birthday in the Batcave. Doing diagnostics. Refreshing surveillance logs. Eating cereal out of a coffee mug. Like it’s not the most depressing way to turn nineteen.

And then the lights go out.

Not all of them. Just the perimeter lights. A very specific, very deliberate power dip. Because that’s apparently how Lady Shiva says hello.

She doesn’t say happy birthday right away. She just stands there in the half-shadow, arms folded, watching him like she’s assessing if he’s taller or if she just forgot how short he used to be.

“I brought food,” she says finally, and tosses a brown paper bag onto the desk.

Inside: dumplings. From that place in Chinatown with the crab logo he used to sneak off to between patrols. It’s still hot.

She doesn’t stick around. Just says, “Don’t waste it,” and disappears back into the dark like a cryptid. No hug. No smile. Nothing soft.

There's nothing particularly nice about it.

Next is Riddler.

He sets off every alarm on his way down the cave's elevator, and Tim barely has time to disable the failsafes before Edward saunters in wearing a blazer that could double as a traffic hazard.

“I brought you a game,” he announces, like this is normal. Like they’ve done this before.

It’s a puzzle box—wooden, intricate, probably one-of-a-kind. No branding, just a spiraling Latin inscription and a note tucked beneath the lid: "You’re harder to stump at nineteen. I’m offended, but i'll keep working harder to outsmart you, watch out birdy boy."

It’s mocking. Theatrical. Annoyingly sincere in a way that almost makes Tim smile.

Tim mutters a thank-you he doesn’t quite mean, but also kind of does.

Catwoman shows up uninvited (of course). No alarm this time—just a tap on the Batmobile’s roof as she lounges against it like it’s her personal chaise lounge.

“Word on the rooftops was that it’s your big day,” she purrs. “I figured the Bats forgot.”

She tosses him a small, flat box wrapped in a ribbon he’s 90% sure is from one of Gotham’s high-end jewelry stores. Inside is a slim data drive.

“Encrypted files on the mayor’s shady offshore accounts,” she says, almost bored. “Happy birthday, bird boy.”

Then, a wink. And she’s gone, leaving a faint trace of perfume and the knowledge that she absolutely used Bruce’s garage code to get in.

And then.

Ra’s.

Because of course there’s a transmission from Ra’s al Ghul, as if today hadn’t been weird enough.

The Batcomputer beeps ominously and suddenly there he is, on every monitor, standing before some firepit like he’s about to start a Gregorian chant.

“Detective,” he begins, smooth and dramatic and so deeply irritating. “I find the anniversary of your birth… worthy of acknowledgement.”

There’s a pause. Like he’s searching for the words “happy birthday” and finding them both distasteful and beneath him.

“I have arranged for several of your enemies to experience... inconvenience today. A small gesture.”

Which is Ra’s-speak for “I kidnapped half the Gotham underworld so you could have a quiet evening.”

It’s dumb. And morbid. And weird. But he remembered. Which is more than anyone else did.

Midnight hits. The cave is dark again. Shiva’s bag is empty. The logic puzzle sits unsolved on the floor. Selina’s drive hums faintly where he’s left it connected to his laptop. The screens have long since gone cold, the remnants of Ra’s transmission fading.

No texts. No calls. No Bats.

Just a handful of villains with weird boundaries and the emotional range of a brick.

Somehow, it still means something.

Somehow, it’s not the worst birthday he’s ever had.

[menlove]

youve probably answered this before but what DO you think is the most realistic version of what went down?? like do you think paul misinterpreted john's hints or that john never made it clear enough to paul how he felt? i know theres no way to know but you have such a good grasp on their personalities and this seriously might haunt me forever lkadjf

i actually don't think i have ! i wrote a lil speculative Thing about what things would look like if paul were queer and closeted (which is what i think) and that interpretation but never specifically this question but...

this is long and rambly but have my thoughts lmfao

basically To Me i do think they had some sort of sexual relationship. to me it's honestly the most likely scenario given the..... everything. their interactions with each other, some of their songs about each other ("i used to hold you in my arms"), the way things blew up so spectacularly, etc. and my reasoning there is mostly that. we know already that they had really loose sexual boundaries with each other. they jerked off together, they fucked women in the same room together & allegedly together as well. and already just those two/three things constitute as a sexual relationship, but not smth they would've seen as one.

but i do think they did more than that. i mean, it doesn't really matter if they did more than that, the rest of what i'm gonna speculate stands even if all they ever did was jerk off together and fuck women together, but like... aside from the like Mountains of evidence that there was something there, i just think it makes sense w their personalities. john isn't the type of person to have self-restraint and i don't think paul, especially when he was younger, would've turned john down. i think if john was into men (which he was, we know this) and if he was into paul (incredibly likely) then he would've made a move. and i think if he made a move and got rejected he would have raised hell, and that never happened.

i think they probably started doing shit together (again, the extent of that is debatable) and they absolutely did Not think of it as being anything queer. i couldn't tell you the mental loops they tied themselves in there, but i have Some thoughts just based on who they are. i think john probably passed it off as like "a hand's a hand, a mouth's a mouth" type of thing (which is hilariously something yoko talks about him saying in her audio diary during the white album sessions). and i think paul probably saw it (& any other things he was doing with men, if he did) as something fun that feels good and isn't something he needs to like look into deeply. i think neither of them would've thought of themselves as queer, bc they probably thought of queerness as very binary- you're either gay or you're straight. and they both were into women (.....ostensibly) so they couldn't be gay. i think john like realized, on some level, that he was queer and Hated it about himself for a very long time and only started coming to grips with it towards the end of his life. i think paul eventually came around to it but by that time he was married to linda (& if rumors are to believed, possibly having threesomes with her and men lmfao) & i don't think he would Ever want to come out publicly even if he's out privately (which i do think he is).

so why didn't they get together? why is paul so insistent that john was straight and not in love with him? i think they just genuinely never talked about it. ever. like i don't think they had that conversation. if neither of them were gay and their sexual relationship was just john and paul things, there wasn't any need to talk about it. queerness was more acceptable for the young. not in an open sort of way, absolutely not, but in the way that they could tell themselves they'd grow out of it, they were just messing around, etc.

i think things got harder when brian died- he died queer, alone, and in a situation that a lot of people thought was suicide. and ofc, we know the band didn't think it was suicide, and i don't think it was either, but that's the kind of thing that sticks in the back of your mind. esp if you're like john who had a lot of mystical/magical thinking. i think it was a bit of a wake up call. time to grow up. i think they both thought they were each the Only one dealing with actual queer feelings & attraction to the other and were soooo sure the other one was just straight and fucking around. which probably hurt, quite a bit, but wasn't something they wanted to look at anyway.

and when john got with yoko and got serious with her, i think that was the bubble bursting. cynthia was different. they got together so young, he never made her a priority, he cheated on her constantly, belittled her, didn't have a place for her by his side bc he carved that space out exclusively for paul. and you can tell that just by the amount of quotes paul has about john marrying yoko being the catalyst, about it being time to grow up, etc which is insane considering he was already married and so were george and ringo. for years. so it was something deeper than that. and it's bc he was actually taking yoko seriously. paul's spot as john's primary partner got filled by a woman. who john was genuinely in love with, not like cynthia which was a marriage fueled by the age old tale of an unplanned pregnancy and comphet. and paul can't argue with that. like....... if he viewed what they were doing as messing around as kids, with john being straight and him being the one pining, he wouldn't want to fuck up john's chance at a Normal Straight Love. if he were a girl, he could, but he wasn't. what he Could do was match him and grow up too. cue the immediate pivot to get married and have children, eventually fulfilled in linda.

but i don't think he expected the band to implode just bc they stopped being so close in whatever manner. but it did. along with other reasons, obviously- there's a million reasons the band broke up, but i think they could've weathered it if they had kept the closeness they'd had at the beginning. or if they'd been single or even if they'd just kept viewing each other as their primary partner aside from their wives.

i think they both came to terms with what they actually meant to each other in the 70s, but they never actually... told each other. what we have from john is jealous guy, which paul was allegedly told was about him, and that demo version of real love that paul never even heard where he laments about him having a baby/farm and how he used to hold him. there's also (just like) starting over, but that one's easy to see as being for yoko too and paul wouldn't have thought twice about it. then you have now & then and real love, which were on that damn tape for paul :( like he literally didn't hear them until after john died and we know he likes the idea that now & then is about him but even then he doesn't sound totally convinced

for paul we have a lot. but a lot of his like more vulnerable songs were only released after john died. like here today, obviously, but there's also some pretty telling ones that john never would've heard (like best friend, which he played live, but wasn't on any album until 2018. or a more of a Stretch of one but i 100% think is about john, hey diddle, which was kept off ram and only released in 2001).

so like i think they very much both came to grips with the fact that they had been in love with each other, but they never really.... thought that could be returned. so ofc paul's going to say shit like how he likes the theory that john was in love with him or wrote now & then about him. but he doesn't believe it, because to him john was Genuinely straight and he was the weird one. and vice versa. i think i saw a more recent thing from him coming around more on the idea of john being bi, but honestly i think that's just hard for him to come to grips with bc what the hell are you supposed to do with that? like yeah, he was into men, possibly even romantically, on a genuine level, just not him? that's hurtful. i don't think he wants to think of that option. bc that's more likely to him than the idea that john was in love with him and hiding it the whole time. which is also heartbreaking. bc then it's just a tragedy of circumstances and missed chances- which is what i think it was. and neither of those routes are something i think he wants to consider, so john has to be straight in his mind.

but if he's coming around on that, he's probably coming around on one of those two options. i hope it's the latter bc the idea that he'd think even now that john never loved him is just so fucking sad. and considering his comments about now & then, as well as the lyrics video for now & then, i really do think the latter is more likely.

anywayyyyy tl;dr i think they fucked around sexually in Some Way, never said a single thing romantically, both came to terms w their feelings in the 70s but by then it was too late and they didn't think the other one would reciprocate anyway, and now paul's been trying to come to grips w the ambiguity of their relationship for the last 40+ years.

[ihauvescurvy]

Assorted modern AU pet headcanons

Sol has a big pit bull rescue who he treats like a princess. She has sweaters for different holidays and her big smiling face features prominently in his socials. He loves to take her out to play at the park or go on runs with him.

Despite how much he gets compared to a puppy himself, Edward is more of a cat guy. He likes dogs fine and enjoys playing with his friends’ pets, but has two cats himself. His favorite place to be is cozy on the couch with both his fluffy sons sleeping on him while he plays video games. (He also technically has a horse but she lives at his parents’ barn and he doesn’t really think of her as “his pet.”)

Jopson never had pets growing up and doesn’t really know what to do with them. He’s privately considered getting a cat because it would be nice to take care of something and he likes that cats clean themselves.

George has a tiny Pomeranian named something silly. His dog absolutely has her own Instagram/tiktok/whatever where George writes all the posts as if she’s the one running the account. “Her” profile picture is George pushing her in a pet stroller while they wear matching sunglasses.

Irving has a beagle who likes to join him on hikes and a lazy domestic shorthair. He claims to be more of a dog person and was raised with dogs, but the cat showed up one day on his porch, hungry and wet, and just settled right in.

Crozier has some kind of big, chill dog. He’s a mutt of some kind and was rescued from an abusive environment. Jopson and Blanky helped pick him out after Crozier had reached a milestone in his recovery. He tries to hide his massive body under the couch during storms, and Crozier is very patient and comforting with him.

Blanky has a 3-legged lab who he got specifically because he thought it was hilarious to have a dog that “matched” him. He’s very playful, and they make lots of visits to the park to run around and play. They’re occasionally joined by Crozier and his dog, but that mostly ends up being Blanky’s dog just running in circles around them.

Goodsir has a lizard of some kind and a tortoise. He works very hard to maintain their tanks to their needs and is always doing research on what enrichment he can provide them. He gets quietly offended when people suggest he should get a more cuddly pet.

Hickey has ferrets. He finds them deeply entertaining and is always sending pics of them looking cursed to his groupchat.

Dundy has an extremely pampered purebred cat named Duchess or something. She has a better diet than most of their friends because he’s a foodie in every possible way. He doesn’t dress her up (she’s too dignified for that), but he brushes her every day to keep her looking and feeling her best.

[voylitscope]

This post about fic length came across my dash. It got me thinking about how many truly incredible Stucky fics under 5k I've read — specifically about the short fics that have broken and/or healed my heart.

So, I made this quick rec list of 10 under 5k Stucky fics that are deeply heart-affecting and emotionally devastating.

(There are so many beautiful, moving, and painful fics in this fandom that come in at under 5k. In the interest of keeping this list to 10 fics, these fics are all also canon/canon-divergent.)

💔 Cheat Days | chicklette | Mature | 2,033 words | Pre/Post TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

Only on the very worst days – when he is tired and sore and hurts all over, hurts inside and out. Sometimes it’s the fight that does it, his need to be held, to be loved after throwing himself on the line. Other times it’s something else - something more cruel – a joke that he knows Bucky would find hilarious, a movie that Bucky would have loved, a book. Sometimes Steve is just so goddamned lonely that he feels like he’s going to come out of his skin. Then he has what he calls a cheat day. A day when he closes up his apartment and uses the coin, and sighs into Bucky’s embrace.

💔 029. Mirror | aimmyarrowshigh @aimmyarrowshigh | Mature | 2,400 words | Pre-War

Quote I'm unwell about:

“I wanna sit at his bedside when he’s sick,” Bucky says finally. “And buy him hot dogs at Dodgers games. And uh… I guess, I wanna…” He exhales and looks down, away from Mrs. Rogers’ eyes. They’re too much like Steve’s and Bucky’s never said this out loud, not even to him. “I wanna get an apartment for the two of us and curtains that close, and I want to teach him how to dance to Cole Porter records. I want to finish all his stupid fights. I want… I dunno. A lotta impossible things.” Sarah’s voice is so soft. “Like what?” “I want to see him grow old,” Bucky mutters. “Right beside me. I want it to be a hundred years from now and look to my right and see Stevie standin’ there.” He blinks away the heavy wetness in his eyes.

💔Not the Needle, Nor the Thread | steebadore | Explicit | 2,017 words | Post-TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

"Okay, sweetheart, okay," Bucky whispers, running his thumbs over Steve's brow, his wet eyelids, down that bumpy, ungainly nose--the only physical evidence that Steve is a flawed human and not a figure cut from marble. If you asked Bucky what he loved most about Steve, he might say something like his goddamn earnest heart, or those too beautiful-for-spacious-skies eyes, but really it was this: the bump on Steve's nose, put there by Bucky himself, age eleven. Selfish, maybe, but Bucky never pretended to be otherwise these days. He doesn't know why the serum didn't fix that--Bucky likes to think it couldn't. Steve always said how it didn't change anything, just amplified what he already had, and what he had was Bucky's mark on him, down to the bone. This one's mine, it said. You cannot have him. Not the whole of him.

💔Through the notches in your spine | caughtinanocean | Explicit | 4,460 words | Post-TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

Maybe Steve was right to worry, and maybe he's not ready and—he's breathing too fast, and Steve's going to notice any moment now, going to stop and leave. Steve lets go of Bucky's hand to stroke the side of his face, tender and soothing. He leans in to give Bucky a soft kiss on the lips, and Bucky doesn't feel so panicky anymore. He's with Steve. Steve is inside of him, as close as someone could be, and nothing bad could ever come of that. Bucky wills himself to focus on the moment, to watch Steve's face, soft with affection, to relax and enjoy this. “'s like it's my first time all over again. How many people get a shot at that twice?” Steve groans. He looks flushed and giddy and bright, and Bucky's inordinately proud that it's his words and his body making Steve glow like that. “I'm gonna make it way better for you this time.” “Our first time was bad?” Bucky asks, trying not to sound crushed, even though he feels it a little.

Steve traces Bucky's jaw and down the line of his neck to caress his chest. “No, our first time was perfect. We had no idea what we were doing, but it was perfect.”

💔A History of Birds | OddityBoddity | Not Rated | 2,580 words | Post TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

“I don’t remember,” he says. Steve holds his breath. “I don’t remember telling anybody about that.” It’s like there’s something stuck between his lungs, like something’s pulling them apart in his chest. “You mean about the bird?” he whispers. Bucky looks at him. Not staring, not really, but looks at him like Steve’s looked at paintings before. Like he’s trying to work out how it’s done. “That little bird,” Steve says quietly. When he speaks, he speaks like the words are a spell or a prayer. Like the words are going to reach into Bucky the way his name once did. Like they’re going to catch his arms and pull him up to safety. This secret they both kept. Something so little, so inconsequential that no one has touched it.

💔You Will Meet a Stranger | spitandvinegar | Mature | 3,081 words | Post-TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

"Steve," she says, unruffled. "He needs someone who'll look at him without pining for who he used to be."

Steve sets his coffee cup upright again. He mops up the mess with a napkin. "Honestly," he says, "All I ever pine for is for him to look back."

💔This is the place | dharmashark @dharmasharks| Explicit | 4,654 words | Canon divergence

Quote I'm unwell about:

With a metal hand there, under the small of his back, Steve might as well be weightless. It’s terrifying. For Steve to be so fragile in ways that Bucky isn’t, and might never understand. But Steve has never been afraid, has never shrank away. Not ever. Not even when Bucky could have—when he would have—when he almost hurt him—Steve had only balled his fists and locked fierce, red-rimmed eyes on his. Steve is fragile; he is unbreakable. Bucky’s memory is full of contradictions.

💔i've seen my share of trouble and i've held my weight in shame | inevitablemeow  | Teen | 4,166 words | Post-TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

Bucky is a ghost, still, in the wind so far they haven’t been able to find him. It’s been six months since the helicarrier, and Steve hasn’t lost hope, not fully, but he’s slowed his search. Seeing this heart, knowing that all the others are his, has that hope roaring back to life. They’re his. They’re all for him.

💔sorrow sings a song in me | unicornpoe | Teen | 4,425 words | Post-TWS

Quote I'm unwell about:

Bucky’s note is on a thick piece of cardstock, and the words are a little more steady, this time. STEVE, IT HELPS ME TO READ THESE THINGS. I THOUGHT IT MIGHT HELP YOU TOO. I MISS YOU. I WANTED TO CRAWL UNDER THAT BLANKET WITH YOU, BUT I DIDN’T KNOW IF I SHOULD. I DON’T THINK I’M GENTLE ANYMORE, AND I WANT TO BE GENTLE WITH YOU.

💔more than anything | jehans | Explicit | 2,938 words | Pre-War

Quote I'm unwell about:

Steve is a reckless asshole who Bucky loves unconditionally and wholeheartedly, and when Steve is quietly undoing him in their bed, loving on him openly and indulgently the way Bucky doesn’t always let him, it becomes difficult to keep pretending that Bucky wouldn’t go to the ends of the earth for any of Steve’s whims. But mostly, what makes him so honeyed in these moments is the way Steve transforms. When he climbs on top of Bucky, all of Steve’s usual, too-close-to-the-surface anger drains out of his eyes, clearing away into pure blue skies of utter adoration. It’s an honesty that Bucky cracks under, breaking open the clay of mundanity and allowing him to shine brightly under Steve’s hands.

Fic rec series

[loganficsonly]

‎ . ݁⋆ ۶ৎ ݁˖ . ݁ fic + writer recs 1‎ . ݁⋆ ۶ৎ ݁˖ . ݁

As I sit here contemplating the nearing conclusion of my Worst!Logan x Reader series, I think about all the fics I devoured while embarking on the writing journey myself. It’s astounding how much talent is in this space. Even more astounding that we get to enjoy such quality art and entertainment for free.

I try my best to leave comments and make my enjoyment known, but I have to admit that I wanted to find a way to share in a more organized way.

So here’s the first of my fic-slash-writer’s recommendations. I’m adding this to my pinned post—please check it out periodically and, most importantly, send love to these amazing writers who have inspired me! (Sorry not sorry, a lot of these are Bucky fics LMAO)

⚠️ Some NSFW works below! Minors please do not interact. The rest of you, proceed with caution.

In alphabetical order:

I look up to 🍀 @artficlly for writing fics that play out like a movie and tastefully intriguing worldbuilding (as demonstrated in close quarters, the first of her works that I read). Her aptitude for writing nuanced, real characters is all over her work. I am ever so invested in lessons in lovemaking, and her one-shot this is (not) fine weaves the common miscommunication trope into something deeply heart-wrenching and real. Her fics are masterclasses in writing, really.

Sophie’s (🍀 @barnesonly) series Lust is captivating from the very start, not just because it’s a professor and student romance, but because Sophie describes human emotion and intimacy so precisely, I felt myself feeling whatever’s written. Easiest 11k words a chapter I’ve ever read, so immersive. 

🍀 @buckyseternaldoll has made me (sorry if TMI) sooo hot and bothered for Bucky with her many ravishing one-shots. If you want to read your blorbo (Bucky Barnes) being put in a situation, go to her masterlist. on command was wild but incredibly believable and well-written. So was Every Inch, Every Corner. Keep putting him in situations, Elle 🫡

Not only is Lily (🍀 @buckysleftbicep) a really sweet person, she is a talented and prolific writer. It’s alarming to see her pump out chapter after chapter of her recent series bent and bruised, maintaining high quality with each release. (I in no way condone pressuring her to update, by the way, just wanted to point out a crazy feat. She can upload as often as she wants!) Love at first sight with her fic lined up and for better or for worse. 

🍀 @crybabycabin blew me away when I recently read her fic pressure points. An excellent example of characterizing a reader insert (for me personally). This fic touched me in a way that specifically reminded me why I love x reader fics: that through their characterization, I am able to practice empathy and challenge my own personal shortcomings. I really can’t recommend it enough and I am so happy there’s still more of her work I haven’t read!

Another wizard who writes like they’re running out of time, Liv (🍀 @cursedheartsclub) has been posting responses to prompts like a madwoman and all of them are exceptional. But I wholeheartedly recommend her Bucky oneshots. They’re all so good and there would be too many to mention, but my personal favorites are: the secretary clause for that intense yearning and pain, where the quiet lives for beautifully written stillness and reflection, and about time, which made me lose it in the comments. That last one made me ascend to a different plane of existence!  

🍀 @danysdaughter‘s killer three-parter The Education Of James Buchanan Barnes has it all: a kind-of-hilarious-but-also-extremely-sexy premise, the funny feeling in my stomach that only friends-to-lovers fics can make you feel, and phenomenal prose with a dash of humor. Made me laugh and become horny and yearn all while reading the fic, like… the fuck.

Of course no one will be surprised that I’m mentioning 🍀 @houseofhyde of manchild fame. It’s real, it’s sexy, it’s got organic free-range banter that flows like natural mountain water, it’s sweet, it’s angsty—what it is is a well-balanced masterpiece with Bucky so realistic you could swear it’s canon. Marvelous pacing and beats, too, with every sentence propelling you to read more and more. The way the reader is characterized in that story is so insightful and astute, you can’t help but empathize. I also have this criminally sexy drabble saved. 

🍀 @marvelstoriesepic ‘s two-parter In too deep and Different this time is earnest, painful in all the right ways, and will ruin your expectations when it comes to real men. Has smut made you cry? This one probably will. I know firsthand how difficult it is to juggle horniness and emotional vulnerability but J is a master at it. I will continue to devour her other fics.  

I read Abigail’s (🍀 @mcrdvcks) recent fic borderline and it was such a fun read! Don’t get me wrong, I love reading smut, but this fic was such a breath of fresh air. It’s funny (starring Jeff the landshark), and tooth-rottingly cute with a dash of tension brought to you by Emma Frost herself. I was not a Star Wars girlie until reading about how Anakin uses the force during foreplay. That one was… I have nothing appropriate to say about that fic (compliment).

🍀 @mysticalcrowntyrant has a collection of yandere fics that I just happened to stumble upon one day, and this one in particular was haunting and enchanting at the same time. It’s incredible how they weave stories of twisted love with characters that you don’t know, but somehow are familiar with. Like you’ve met them in a dream. Beautiful, beautiful prose.  

The lovely 🍀 @rosesaints Mara. I would love to just ramble about her fucking fics, like you don’t understand. I think the first one I read was when the sun hits (it matters where you are), a devastating take on soulmate!au that left me reeling: it’s mature, grounded, and so damn authentic. Her pr manager!reader fic is another masterpiece in writing a reader with an occupation—I’m always in awe when a fic writer manages to immerse you in the type of work the reader does in an x reader. And if you’re into baby fever with Bucky, thank her after reading this. 

always happy to get recs from others!

[internetgiraffekid1673]

Raven Queen's Bottomless Compassion: Exhibit Duchess

As a fandom, I don't think we talk enough about just how incredible Raven is, which is a shame because SHE'S THE MAIN CHARACTER!

And there are lots of things to like about her! She's obviously got her incredibly interesting and complex relationships with Apple and her mother and her story-driving, world-shattering actions as she rebels against an oppressive system.

But even beyond the main story beats, Raven is a delight! She's funny and has an amazing dry, observational kind of humor that makes every scene hilarious. She's creative and clever, capable of making both very well-thought out plans and improvising decisions on the fly. She's constantly in wonder of the world around her, even despite the horrible looming destiny system, and is able to find joy in things as simple as tea with her friends or playing guitar. She's relatable, and she feels like she could be a friend of anybody watching or reading the series.

But today, what I want to talk about is Raven's neverending all-consuming COMPASSION. Raven Queen is able to find the good and a reason to love every single person in her life.

This is really obvious in scenarios like Apple, who Raven considers a friend and enjoys being around, even as Apple tries to force Raven into a terrible life that she doesn't want. It's obvious in instances like Cerise, who Raven didn't know very well prior to Cerise sharing her secret, and who Raven still goes out of her way to help and love and support, to the point that Cerise joins her main friend group. It's obvious in cases like Dexter, who feels inferior and unseen around most people but who Raven values and admires from their first real interaction, and it makes him feel good about himself.

I could go on and on, but today I wanna talk specifically about Raven's compassion towards Duchess Swan. This is gonna get long, so under a cut it goes!

Now, from what I remember, Raven and Duchess don't interact much in the cartoon. When they do, it's usually with Duchess acting as part of a group of Royals, not independently. If I'm wrong, feel free to correct me and add your own examples!

But in the books? Their relationship makes me feral. Duchess treats Raven similarly to how she treats everyone else: badly. Her rude and self-absorbed attitude make her one of the first people to mock Raven, and while the books make it clear this has been happening since they were in Nursery-Rhyme school, it's clearly demonstrated in one of the earliest scenes of the Storybook of Legends (Briar's Book-to-School Bash).

After this scene, Raven goes back to her room, buries her face in her pillow, and refuses to speak to anyone. But this is how their relationship starts. Duchess is cruel and antagonistic, like she is with everyone (although moreso with Raven, since the greater royal-rebel tension is coming into play here), and it deeply hurts Raven enough that she literally explodes. Duchess knows she's made a mistake, but doesn't do much to repair things with Raven beyond avoiding her.

Duchess fades into the background for a bit until Next Top Villain, which is HER book. The premise of this book is that Duchess gets assigned to General Villainy by Headmaster Grimm who is now taking Raven seriously and is worried he can't make her be the Evil Queen for the Snow White story. Since he knows about Duchess' willingness to try to steal other people's destinies (ANYBODY's destiny, since she's got a REALLY terrible fate all things considered), Grimm puts her in General Villainy and hopes she'll go after Raven.

Duchess is at first reluctant and confused (she has the same dilemma as Raven of "which is worse, failing a class called General Villainy or acing it,"), but she overhears Grimm discussing his plans for Duchess with Badwolf, and counts that as permission to go all in.

When Blondie decides to advertise the General Villainy's latest thronework of "do a rotten and nasty plan," and turn it into a televised competition, Sparrow (who is ALSO in the class due to Grimm trying to capitalize on his less-than-heroic tendencies) gives Duchess the advice of just sabotaging all the other students plans (he's gonna double cross her at the end, but that's not important right now).

So, Duchess goes about spying on her classmates, ruining their plans, and netting them all failures while she creeps closer to an A. For the whole competition, Duchess is SURE Raven is going to be her biggest obstacle. I think this goes to show JUST how deep the brainwashing runs in EAH society.

This is AFTER Raven has very publically refused to sign her page and has become the face of the Rebel campaign. Duchess has WATCHED Raven in general villainy say that she doesn't want to be evil and would rather just be nice. And Duchess is still convinced that Raven must be a true villain at her heart and is going to do an actual nasty scheme, and she has no idea how she's going to sabotage it. So, she goes to spy on Raven to get some ideas.

And look. If I were Raven, I would still be pretty upset with Duchess at this point. She's said and done some really awful things to Raven and people Raven considers friends. Yes Raven has bigger things to worry about. Yes being hostile and bitter takes more energy than being nonchalant and kind. But I don't think I would have been able to forgive Duchess at this point.

But when Raven catches her spying (in swan form), this is how the interaction goes.

Apple was in the room with them JUST a few seconds ago. She really easily could have sold Duchess out, or at the very least ignored her. But instead, she acknowledges Duchess with her trademark intelligence and casual kindness, which Duchess has NO IDEA how to react to.

The book continues and there's some incredibly heart-wrenching and dramatic stuff where Duchess sabotages her roommate Lizzie, who she's been slowly building a genuine odd friendship with. Duchess is probably at her lowest point in this scene I'm about to share, and when Raven steps up to reveal her plan, she's thinks she's about to lose absolutely everything---her friend, her reputation, AND her grade. But Raven surprises her.

Before we get on to the next part, I want to stop and mention that not only did Raven NOT HAVE TO DO THIS, it also had to be INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT FOR HER. Remember, Raven doesn't have very good control of her magic (as seen in the party). Even when she's just trying to use small amounts to help herself, it usually ends out working not quite right (like launching herself into the sky instead of turning invisible, or making her heavy trunk trail behind her with snail slime instead of making it feather light). And in the very first scene of the books, we learn that Good Intentions + Raven's Evil Magic = Disaster (and usually fire and/or explosions).

Raven could have very easily just said "I'm not doing a scheme, leave me alone." She's under no obligation to help Duchess. She's not trying to be evil, and she doesn't want people thinking she is. This kind of blasè brush-off would be perfectly on-brand for Raven. But instead she takes a MAJOR risk using her uncontrolled magic and puts on this big show just to help someone who's been nothing but cruel to her. And why?

RAVEN QUEEN IS FULL OF NEVER-ENDING AND BOTTOMLESS COMPASSION!

She SEES Duchess in a way that literally nobody else does. She SEES Duchess in a way that she is able to SEE every single person for who they really are and what they really want. And when she realizes that Duchess is unhappy in the life she's been handed, Raven ignores ALL the horrible things Duchess has done to her to help her change it AND stops to let Duchess know "I respect your right to make your own choices, but I don't think this'll get you what you want."

And I think it being Duchess specifically in this instance is REALLY important. Apple might be trying to force Raven into becoming a terrible person and living a miserable life, but Apple does still LIKE Raven. She values Raven's skills and personality, and, as long as the subject of destiny doesn't come up, is pretty nice and polite to her. She would never consider doing the things Duchess does like insulting Raven's father.

But even when it comes to people who have been literally NOTHING but unkind and malicious to her, Raven Queen's heart is so big that she does her absolute best to love them and help them become better people anyway. And if that isn't an absolutely amazing role model of a main character, then I don't know what is.

As the book continues, Sparrow double crosses Duchess by playing his guitar really loudly and startling Lizzie's horse during their Princessology riding exam. Lizzie's horse runs off course and almost kills her Sparrow, but Duchess saves her just in time. This causes Mr. Badwolf to Fairy Fail Duchess (since, saving a Princess' life outweighs her schemes), but it does save her friendship with Lizzie.

And the people at the end of the book who comfort Duchess after her dangerous and daring rescue aren't any of the princes or any of the teachers or any of the other Royals. It's Lizzie Hearts---her roommate, the girl she just saved, and the person who is now probably her best friend---and Raven Queen.

The girl who's endless compassion and willingness to say "No, this is wrong, there is a better way" is a force for change and good so strong that it can do almost anything. From something as big as defying an oppressive system and inspiring others to do so too, to something as important as saving Cerise and Maddie from exile, to something as small and simple as inspiring someone as bitter and afraid as Duchess to be a little braver, a little kinder, and a little better.

Also, massive thank you to @athena-xox for having ALL of the EAH media available digitally for free in her pinned post, it makes analysis like this so much easier.

Give it up for Raven Queen.

[tac-the-unseen]

What the Lost boys think about vampire related media

Fluff, x reader but just barely

•While making conversation with your four Vampire lovers you were suddenly plagued with a question.

“How do you guys feel about vampire related media?”

-That question was an immediate head turner. The cave goes dead quite before Dwayne speaks up, “Well…vampires are in hiding so…”

-This sparks a conversation about how media representation of vampires may not be accurate, but that's a good thing. “If a book or movie comes out and it is shockingly accurate to what being a vampire is really like, the creator isn't going to last long.” David explained

-That's because there's a set of rules vampires have to follow and one of those rules is to never publicly reveal your double life identity

-”If something like that comes out, that means a vampire has broken that rule OR somebody knows vampires very closely and is creating media they know shouldn't exist.”

-Turns out if a vampire breaks that rule it's basically open season to kill and destroy their creations.

•You turn the conversation and begin to ask how they, specifically, feel about certain vampire representation

•Bram Stoker's Dracula

-Dwayne is the first to buy in his opinion.

-Dwayne feels that while it is a cult classic and well written, The characters are exceedingly dumb.

-”Johnathan spends a ridiculous amount of time talking about other characters ‘Breasts’ and trying to figure out why his host climbs walls ‘like a lizard's.”

-David is the next one to speak up

-David thinks it's not really worth the read

-”Unless you're trying to brag to people there's no point in reading it.”

-”Also why was Mina talking to that old sailor so much?”

-Paul laughs as he remembers “how fucking crazy he wrote Dracula to be”

-”I'm pretty sure the real Dracula thinks it's a heinous crime against him”

-Paul hasn't read it but have heard enough about it to know even the more obscure references

-Marko comments on the graceful writing style and the beautiful descriptions

-”I've only read it because Dwayne thought I would like it"

-Marko also loves how oblivious Jonathan and most of the other characters are

-All of them think the movie adaptation is hilarious and love the shitty special effects

•Interview with a vampire

-Paul chimes in immediately

-”God it's so homo erotic it hurts…in a good way.”

-Paul thinks its a nice horror novel mixed with a weird cozy atmosphere

-Dwayne thinks it's another well written classic and He actually begins to rave about all the themes involved within Anne Rice’s work

-”It's a beautiful Gothic thriller with a deep, sadly comedic energy.”

-He even offers to read it too you sometime

-Marko chimes in quickly about “Claudia’s rebellious behavior and persona”

-”imagine watching your family choose somebody else over you. It's so deeply upsetting but to an understandable level.”

-”I would have hated to turn so young. I look like a teenager and other people can respect that to a certain point. But being five years old with the mind of an adult, No one would respect you.”

-Marko relates to Claudia on an internal level and loves unraveling her character. When you ask why he quickly responds "Some people call me a cherub... You think I enjoy that?"

-David says he doesn't have much to say other than it was a decent read (That's his version of a compliments)

•Twilight

-All of them agree that it's laughably horrendous

-Almost immediately at the same time they say “This is the skin of a killer Bella”

-This leads to banshee like laughter

David speaks up immediately

-”Why do you humans want us to sparkle so bad?”

-”I personally hate the idea of being a walking disco ball, but to each their own.”

-Marko chimes in quickly

-”Would you like it if we sparkled?” He asked while leans on you affectionately

-Marko thinks the only reason to read it is to have a nice laugh

-”Why did Edward have such a violent reaction of Bella standing by a fan? That makes no sense…like I have mates and I enjoy the smell of you guys but…I'm not nearly clawing off my face at your smell”

-”Yeah yeah, I get he's trying not to overreact but running out of class to get away is crazy.”

-Paul even adds that even thought it's very dumb even he can appreciate the message it's trying to said.

-”something something, coming over adversary, something something, love wins, something something..”

-”Also that Jacob imprinting on Bella's infant daughter is super fucking creepy.”

-when you asked Dwayne about his feels he scoffed and said It's insulting at best and borderline sexual harassment at worst.

-He refused to go into depth

•You thank them for humoring you and they tell you that it's no problem

-David kisses the side of your head in an uncharacteristically soft way “We don't ever mind answering your vampire related question.” He tells you

-Marko turns to you “But seriously do you want us to sparkle?”

-”I think I have some roll on body glitter somewhere..” Paul says while getting up to look for it

Thanks for reading <3

[vinelark]

i love ur clark in bbts hes my little guy

and uh sorry that this is kinda specific but i was wondering if u perhaps had any fic recs that has uncle clark moments?

like it doesnt even have to be the focus of the fic just one where clark is kinda there hanging around even if its in the background. i love him terribly even if hes only in like a single scene like in brother wanted by vamillepudding and the second worst thing to happen to those orphans by antebunny

that single scene can fuel me for weeks. ur clark made me want to spontaneously combust i love him so much👍

thank you!! i also love mr. clark kent a whole lot

and yes i sure do! (and i knew immediately what moment you're talking about in brother wanted and it is adorable.)

first and foremost, i have to rec the somebody save me series by Goldmonger. each installment focuses on clark + a robin, and i am both deeply compelled and deeply charmed by each one--in a neat little subversion, the stories are about the robins saving clark, rather than the other way around. in the first, dick saves clark at a gala; in the second, jason notices when clark is pushing himself too far; in the third, tim stands up to a grieving bruce on clark's behalf. i can't pick a favorite, and you'll find an abundance of clark & robin emotions in all of them.

and a few others with some great uncle clark moments:

How to date the Batman by solomonara: delightful and absolutely hilarious; read the whole series for the full cast, but for uncle clark (blurring the lines over to stepdad clark) especially read chapter 3 of this first installment for an excellent clark & jason interaction.

love and bruises by Acin_Grayson and hoebiwan: speaking of clark & jason (and fics being hilarious), this one has all of that with a younger jason and a very stressed out (and amused) superman.

You Are the Sun And I— by lurkinglurkerwholurks: clark will always be there to catch robin (and bruce), whether that terrifies bruce or not.

tacere by mediant: kryptonians purr; this surprisingly comes in handy when bruce and dick are dosed with fear gas.

[moistvonlipwig]

🔥

kara danvers :)

ok well you and i have discussed this at length so this will not be new to you but imco (in my correct opinion) kara danvers [as portrayed by the cw's supergirl, not necessarily in other versions] is actually pretty lazy, and i would argue this is one of her most central and consistent character traits. and i don't just mean physically lazy, although i should note that per 3.17 "trinity" she canonically Hates Walking and doesn't understand why humans exercise. i mostly mean on an intellectual & moral level.

kara wants to be a reporter, but when she figures this out (because......a pretty lady told her she should do it? ig?), she does not apply to journalism school, or take online classes. instead she is handed a reporter job by her boss (who scrawled 'reporter' on her hilariously terrible resume when they met for reasons known only to her) and from then on proceeds to basically just do whatever she wants and get offended when more seasoned reporters who have gone to journalism school ask her to do basic functions of the job like Acquire Sources and Report On The Facts And Not Just Your Personal Opinions. at no point do we really see her ask her colleagues, even friendly ones like james, for advice or help; instead, advice is something that's imposed upon her by the wicked snapper, who dares to be unimpressed by her uneducated slay. throughout the show, on multiple occasions, the idea of actually Doing Her Job seems to offend her -- lena even calls her out for this explicitly in 3.02 "triggers," but she continues to display this behavior with andrea in s5 & s6. in the finale, when she is promoted to editor-in-chief in an act of blatant cronyism that truthfully should prompt the entire catco staff to quit in protest, it is not on her initiative, nor due to her efforts, nor is it because anything about the position has piqued her interest; it is, again, simply handed to her, and she just accepts.

additionally, we rarely see her express meaningful curiosity about, well, any subject, really -- we know she learned calculus young, but her interest in math and science seems nil; she is deeply naive about the u.s. justice system in s6 in a way that suggests she has never looked into it, though her own mother was a judge on krypton; and a lot of her interests seem very Basic (pizza, potstickers [? why girl.], nsync, the wizard of oz, harry potter), which to be clear is not inherently a sign of intellectual laziness or incuriosity, but it also does nothing to suggest that she is someone with a wide knowledge of food, literature, music, or film.

she also demonstrates what i would argue is a kind of moral laziness, though you could call it an offshoot of her intellectual laziness, in her general lack of real self-reflection about, like, any of her actions. although some of the other characters sometimes bring up how messed-up the DEO is (e.g. james in s1 with the gitmo comparison -- which, CRAZY line to put in your show and then never address, btw), kara herself does not question it (until the Wrong People take over, of course). her rhetoric in early s2 about daxamites suggests that she is quite comfortable believing sweeping generalizations she was taught as a child and has never really sat down to interrogate them, but while mon-el being.....pretty bad but i guess not as bad as his mom? yay? inspires her to stop being bigoted against daxamites specifically, we will later still hear her say that certain species tend to be peaceful or aggressive, etc., with no self-reflection. in 3.05 "damage," when morgan edge tries to make it seem like lena's lead dispersal device that kara activated poisoned children, kara does not take the opportunity to self-reflect on the choice she made and whether it was worth it; instead, her arc for the episode is reacting emotionally to her best buddy feeling guilty (about the thing kara also did. i cannot emphasize that part enough).

i would argue the conclusion she draws in 5.13, too, smacks of this moral laziness; she spends the episode looking for a magic shortcut to not having to feel bad anymore, and when she can't find one, she decides that actually, meh, there was never a perfect way for things to go down, so all that lying wasn't such a big deal and lena should just get over it. kara is dripping with a lot of guilt in 5A, but throughout both 5A and 5B there's very little actual, thoughtful self-reflection on what she did wrong and why, and that carries over into S6 when, after like ten episodes of lena (and also william ig) repeatedly trying to tell her not to play god, she decides in the very penultimate episode to solve her problems by eating the sun, and then when she decides against it partway through doing it, there's again very little self-reflection on her part of why the hell she thought that was a good thing to do. kara's morality, on the whole, seems largely based on (a) alex and (b) vibes, and not so much on any actual thought she's dedicated to the moral questions at hand.

and similarly to when kara is asked to Do Her Damn Job at her place of work -- when kara is challenged on her morality (like when lena challenges her on the kryptonite in s3, or on myriad in 5.17), she acts annoyed at the very idea of having to do the hard work of thinking about the morals she espouses as a superhero. and it doesn't read as someone who has thought very hard about her moral choices and is offended because she believes so strongly that she's right, because we never actually see her thinking hard about these moral choices she makes at all. it reads as someone who hasn't thought about it beyond a very cursory level and is frustrated that she's being asked to. because, again, she's just fundamentally kind of lazy.

and the thing is this might sound like i am dunking on her but actually i think this is a trait that is incredibly funny. my favorite portrayal of supergirl/kara danvers is the one from the children's cartoon dc super hero girls 2019, whose version of kara is ALSO lazy, on top of being an aggressive, quick-to-anger, rude, irresponsible, selfish brat. and she's hilarious in that show, she's one of my favorite characters. another favorite character of mine, also a children's cartoon character, is anne boonchuy from amphibia, whose entire character journey is about learning not to be physically, intellectually, or morally lazy and learning to [school principal voice] Apply Herself instead. it can be incredibly fun to watch characters be lazy and incurious and self-centered, whether they change for the better or not. but it is a bit strange that some people act like kara is this super disciplined person who loves working out and loves learning and reads widely and is curious about everything and self-reflects on her own decisions and how she affects others to the point of obsession. i wonder if part of it is 'femslash same-character syndrome,' where people slap other characters' traits from other popular femslash ships onto each other. because the character i just described is adora from she-ra. who a lot of people think is similar to kara. except no. she's not at all. as evidenced by this whole write-up ☝️ lol. they're just both blonde and for some reason (#blondephobia?) femslash fandoms wanna act like all blonde girlies are the same. but they are not. #wakeupamerica.....

[rootspiral]

I was rewatching the end of WandaVision recently and I was struck by the parallels between Wanda and Vision's last kiss and Agatha and Rio's, with how both Wanda and Rio are left standing frozen, hands outstretched as if they're still holding their lover's face even as Vision dematerializes/Agatha slowly falls. I just think it's kind of interesting how the two shows echo each other in so many ways. This isn't really a question lol I just remembered while reading your posts and thought I'd share.

There is a lot of intentional rhyming between WandaVision and AAA, you're absolutely right. Even down to the structure of the episodes and overall arc, we start with hilarious little episodes and then the comedy gives way more and more to big scale tragedy. (And I suspect the two last WV episodes would have been much angstier if not for the stupid CGI battles they were forced to add.)

Wanda/Vision and Agatha/Rio exist on the same narrative wavelengths, they are doomed from the start and yet you root for them because they are so so deeply in love - despite the happy ending being so completely unlikely (Vision is a figment of Wanda's imagination, Rio is literally Death) we leave them at the end of the show with a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe they'll meet again and things will work out. Like I said, it is rhyming and it's intentional, there are some very specific themes that Jac and Co. set out to explore.

I find it funny though that despite the parallels between Agatha/Wanda and Rio/Vision, one couple works so well together while the other is such an egregious dysfunctional mess. The endings are complementary, but on one hand we have Vision and Wanda being so sweet and reassuring and helping each other through this horrible ordeal. Like, Vision is so suave and wise, "stands to reason we'll say hello again" etc. Meanwhile Agatha who cannot talk about 1 (one) feeling without screaming in terror kinda just... sticks her tongue down Rio's troath and dies. The icon, the legend, the clown she is.

[candy8448]

My top 10 favorite lu fics!

Ayo since im starting to drift out of the loz/lu fandom, i figured i can make a final list of my top 10 favourite loz fics. These are gonna be ones that i still go crazy for despite finding it hard to read any loz fics since my brain doesnt let me when its not my current hyperfixation. I have read all these fics multiple times and keep revisiting them because of how much i loved them

Here is a collection of all my absolute favourite fics. These are all phenomenal and i love them all, these are just the ones that i have suuch a deep connection with and stand out the most to me:

10. The wondrous sword of legend

Hyrule's sword is legend who, when they join the chain, learns to connect with them as they figure out who he is and how to get his body back. This was such a fun fic. The writing is exelent and i love the way that legend communicates and gets along with the chain. Such an interesting concept and it is just a fun fic to read, had a good time with it. (Longfic, complete)

9. Eventide island

Legend cant help but relate eventide to kohilint, the chain helps him come to terms with his grief by playing the song so personal to him. This fic makes me cry, the writing hits deep in my heart it hurts i acrually shed tears while reading it. The build up to the climax where they play the song, the actual playing the song i can almost hear it and maaaaan its just so good (oneshot)

8. While you still can

Time gets caught in a timeloop, trying to save the chain who got ambushed. I stayed up until the next morning binge reading this fic because it had me at the edge of my seat. While i dont remember the specific details of the plotline, if it can keep me his gripped all night then its so good. Filled with emotion and tension and very well written, striking deeply in my heart. I also just love a good timeloop fic, in that sense @occasionallyprosie 's 'a song on repeat' also ties being such an amazing timeloop fic filled with such good angst and recovery. (Longfic, complete)

7. Violet incidents (series)

Shenanagains as legend needs to keep rescuing various members of the chain by acting as one big happy family to the public, much to his and warrior's dismay. Absolutely hilarious. Whenever i read any of the fics in this series i actually full body stim so hard and laugh out loud, its so good, poor legend =_=, the one saving wars in the bar is probably my favourite im dying (series of oneshots, updating)

5. Souls searching

A sort of character study filled with hurt and comfort. Legend battles with the question wars asked him, what he would do if he wasn't a hero? He goes on through their travelling and figures out what is means to not be a hero with wars to guide him there. This makes my heart ache and the writing is phenomenal, the ways that legend tackles this question in quite scenarios is amazing for his development. (Oneshot)

5. Fitted ever for tender love

Tied 5th, legend's journey to figuring out that she's a girl, with denial and the people closest to him helping him accept who she really is. Such a fun character study, i really find the way that her relationship with marin is explored, i dont think ive ever seen one that is not romantic which while they are definetly a couuple in cannon, its certainly interesting. The scene where legend figures it all out is so vivid in its imagery i honestly feel like im flying, it feels so good. (Oneshot)

3. Act natural

Oh maaaaan this fic, i cannot get enogh of it. The chain shows up to legend's house, legend and ravio desperatly trying (and miserably failing) to hide rhe fact that they are engaged. A whole lot of shenanagains proceed. This fic has me cackling out loud and kicking my feet, its hilarious and i love everything that goes down in it. Despite rereading it many many times it never gets old and it lifts my mood right up. Good ol ravioli crack. (Oneshot)

3. Scales, wings, and mythical things

Tied third, the chain wakes up all in various magical transformations and abilities from their games. They try to rescue those that got kidnapped by magical creature collectors. Its unfinisjed but the first act which i find so so fun and completes on its own is complete and you don't need to continue afterwards. This is just a good fun fic, an action packed adventure with stakes and energy. I loved the way the magical abilities and features are written and magnified to be so so fantastical and fun. So full of whimsy and such a good fic (longfic, unfinished)

2. White walls

OH MY. The chain get captured by climital, a company who takes those with a specific detail in their blood allowing for mutations and experiments far beyond what a normal human can survive. Watch the chain as they grapple with their augmentations and being lab rats in experiments as they try to escape. SUUCH A GOOD FIC!! 'The promised neverland' is my favourite anime and this has major similar vibes, its such good fun in all its angst, comfort, fluff, whump, crack and action. I love the way every character os explored and given abilities that fit their characters. The worldbuilding of the facility they are in is so amazing and the escape feels so earned and powerful. It is mostly a series of oneshots within this setting with the final escape arc being a few chapter long. Every time i got a reply from the author on my comments i knew that meant that the fic had updated that day or the day before and would drop everything to read this fic. It appeals so so much to me and is amazing, i love the depiction of the chain within this very unique and dangerous setting (especially legend, lol). (Longfic, complete)

1. What hyrule hadn't seen

Hyrule and legend get ambushed which results in legend getting blinded. The two grapple with themes of grief and acceptance as legend learns how to adapt to his blindness and hyrule learns that sometimes, support can be the best thing he can do for his brother. This is one of the very first lu fics i have read and since i read it i have had it in first place because of the impact it made on me. I didnt read the tags going in but that honestly made it hit harder. The writing is so immersive, i actually felt blind by the way it was described. It punched you right in the heart and makes you cry, and seeing legend bond and get along with each member of the chain as they learn how to help him and try to communicate with a distant, grief-ridden hyrule fills me so so much with emotion. This fic has a lot of whump, angst, fluff, comfort and also action and writes each chain member with so much dimention. I have probably rambled about this fic before but it really has just had such a lasting impact on me, i have re read it a couple of times and i still think about the messages now. An amazing fic about grief and the journey towards acceptance. (Longfic, complete)