#that’s what hurts so much neither of them deserved what happened to them

[malk1ns]

november 23 vs utah hockey club, 6-1 loss

good grief, guys. at least we've got sidney's 600th goal?

previous soulbond installments: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Zhenya rarely looks forward to long breaks in the schedule. He gets out of his routine when he’s not playing consistently, and the first couple shifts back after more than two days without a game always leave him sucking wind on the bench even when he makes sure to keep up with gym work in between. He likes falling into the rhythm of video-practice-gym-nap-game, likes waking up and knowing exactly where his day will take him. Too much off-time and he gets nervous, rattling around in his house alone and pestering all his friends back in Russia with texts and emails as he tries to distract himself.

Now, though, he’s looking forward to putting this game behind them and having three solid evenings free.

He and Sid need to talk. Neither of them will risk a serious conversation that might impact their sleep and mental state the day before a game, but Zhenya can’t tuck what happened last night to the back of his mind and forget it ever happened.

Zhenya flushes at the memory. The way Sid looks when he comes is etched into his brain now, how red he’d gotten, the way he bit his lips and clung to Zhenya’s shoulders as he shook through his release. 

Zhenya wants to see it again, wants to have enough presence of mind next time to be a little more hands-on in making it happen. He’s never really thought about being with a man before, but he’s not blind, he knows what Sid looks like, and the bond made even that barely-competent fumble so good he wants to know what it would feel like when they’re actually trying.

So, they need to talk.

Zhenya barely even notices the double-heartbeat as he gets ready for the game. His wrist aches, and it almost sends him to the trainers until he remembers Sid slipping away to get his worked on a few days ago. He’s got sore knuckles too, from Sid’s fight the night before.

Most prominent, though, is the front-row seat Zhenya’s getting into how Sidney Crosby mentally prepares for games.

It’s not all that different from Zhenya’s own mindset, really. There’s a comforting background murmur of Sid thinking about the Utah defense running parallel to Zhenya’s own mental review of their goalie’s weak spots, and every now and then he can feel Sid dip into what he’s thinking about to highlight something. Zhenya tries doing the same, tentatively prodding at a move from practice the other day that worked particularly well as Sid’s thinking about it, and Sid’s delight gets Zhenya smiling stupidly at nothing as he makes his lunch.

He’d been hesitant to reach out after he somehow managed to rip that goal from Sid last week and hurt him, worried he wouldn’t be able to adjust and his presence in Sid’s mind would cause him nothing but pain. As they’ve gotten closer, though, the bond seems to be adjusting itself, smoothing out and becoming easier to live with. Zhenya’s glad.

The game starts poorly and only goes downhill from there. It’s like he blinks and they’re down 2-0, staring down the barrel of yet another loss in front of their home fans, who deserve so much better than the Penguins have been giving them for the last couple of seasons. Zhenya’s embarrassed, clutching his stick too tight and overthinking every move on the ice. He doesn’t know how to work himself out of this slump, especially when he’s having to get used to yet another line combination, and even Sid pressed to his side on the bench and conciliatory touches don’t help.

Sid’s feeling the pressure too, Zhenya can tell. They’re doing their best to not work each other up, but neither of them are playing to their potential right now. Amplified emotions on a feedback loop can have a negative impact too.

But then Sid scores his 600th goal.

The crowd erupts. The bench empties. Sid practically whites out with joy and relief as they all slam into him, and Zhenya tucks Sid under his arm, beaming down at him as they’re pressed against the boards by their teammates, everyone reaching in to pat at whatever part of Sid they can reach.

For a few minutes, he and Sid float, suspended in a moment of happiness and pride rebounding back and forth.

As they skate to the bench, though, Sid sinks into an oily, astringent guilt, and when Zhenya tries to catch his eye after the multiple standing ovations the crowd gives him, he stares at his skates.

They lose. Badly. Again. Zhenya doesn’t break his stick on his way down the tunnel, but it’s a near thing, and the locker room is silent and stunned as they clear out.

Sid catches Zhenya’s arm before they exit the change room. “Come over?” he says quietly, and Zhenya nods.

He beats Sid home, idling in the driveway until Sid putters into his garage, and lets Sid fuss at him in the kitchen, grabbing snacks and water and Gatorade until they finally settle at Sid’s tiny kitchen table, knees knocking together.

Sid opens his mouth, but Zhenya beats him to it. “You’re upset after goal,” he says, shivering as the acrid feel of shame blows over them both again. “Why? Like, 600, it’s good, for team and for fans, you know?”

Sid presses his lips together. “I shouldn’t feel good for a personal accomplishment when it doesn’t actually help the team win,” he says quietly, picking at the label on his water bottle. “I’ve never…that’s not why we do this, right, it’s not for our own personal numbers. It’s for the team, it’s for winning, and I’m doing fuck-all to help with that, so…” He shrugs. “It feels wrong to be happy when we lose like that.”

Zhenya shakes his head. “You’re just one guy, Sid,” he says, reaching over to cover Sid’s hand with his own. The touch settles them both so abruptly that Zhenya has to blink away spots in his vision, and Sid’s mouth drops in surprise. “Can’t make team win, can’t make fans happy all yourself. But we’re know this is maybe how it’s go, like, it’s a—transition year—” he struggles over the words Dubas had used when he met with them before the season, “and fans still come to see you play, yes? Like, you’re score big goals, do big things, they’re happy to see.”

“They booed us again,” Sid says, so softly that Zhenya can barely hear him. “They…I mean, it’s not enough. I can’t act like it is.”

Zhenya shrugs. “No,” he admits. “Not enough. I’m not play good enough either, like, not just you. And rest of team…” Zhenya purses his lips and forcibly moves off that topic. They’re not here to talk about the shortcomings of the roster they’re doing their best to bring together tonight. “It’s bad season, maybe worst ever for us. But that’s not mean there’s no good things. It’s okay to say, this was big thing that happens, it’s good, we’re happy for it.” He squeezes Sid’s hand.

Sid curls his fingers into Zhenya’s. “You’re right,” he sighs, picking up the granola bar he’d grabbed and frowning at it. “You’re so good at seeing the bigger picture. I should listen to you more instead of getting stuck in my head so much.”

Zhenya can’t resist. “If you’re stuck in head now I just come get you,” he offers, holding his breath, letting it out in a relieved whoosh when Sid laughs. 

“Oh, we’re joking about it now?” Sid demands, but there’s a cool rush of relief from him too, and Zhenya relaxes.

“Sid,” he says, but he doesn’t know how to continue, because the significance of this, of what’s happened to them and brought them to this point, is suddenly overwhelming, and he has to swallow around the lump in his throat.

They’re bonded. Jesus.

Sid blinks rapidly, eyes suspiciously watery. “I know, G,” he says, clearing his throat. “Look, we need to talk about…I mean, last night, obviously, and…” He’s turning red, Zhenya notes with fascination. “I mean, it was…I’ve never…but there’s other stuff too, and…” Sid sighs, laughing a little and shaking his head. “I’m not even making sense. I’m exhausted and you are too, I can feel it. How about…stay the night. We can talk in the morning. We have a day off, we can sleep in and actually talk about all of this.”

“Stay the night with you?” Zhenya dares, heart thumping.

Sid’s heartbeat speeds up to join his. “If you want,” he replies, catching Zhenya’s gaze and holding it. “Yeah, if you want, stay with me. My bed is big enough for two.”

[jungle-fae]

Bear with me, it’s essay time because crying about beefleaf while rereading some parts of book 4 gave me a LOT of thoughts and emotions.

The more I think about it, the more I’m convinced that beefleaf were never going to get a happy ending, not because mxtx didn’t want to give them one, but because their dynamic literally makes it an impossibility. I don’t think it matters that He Xuan genuinely cared for SQX as Ming Yi because he is never going to be able to look at them without recalling what they took from him. Sure, he might not hate SQX, and he might actually wish them a happy life, but that life cannot be with him.

And this is taking into account a scenario in which He Xuan didn’t kill Shi Wudu, because even if he didn’t, I don’t think he himself could ever be truly happy with SQX. There is too much pain associated with them, and even though they were not the direct cause of that pain, I think it’s still fair for He Xuan not to want to be around that reminder. Is that fair to Qingxuan? Not necessarily, but neither was any of this fair to He Xuan.

I don’t think they could ever have a healthy relationship built upon a foundation filled with so much hurt, because they would only end up hurting each other more, whether intentionally or not. I think they both know this, and it’s why I personally believe that the ending mxtx gave them is the best we could have hoped for. In the end, I believe it’s clear that neither of them hates the other, but they do harbor a lot of complicated feelings on the matter that cannot be resolved with apology and forgiveness.

For Qingxuan’s part, I don’t think they blame He Xuan for their present situation. In fact, they are adamant in relaying to Xie Lian that He Xuan didn’t do anything to them after the events of the Black Water Arc. However, they also seem intent on moving forward with their mortal life. As for He Xuan, his dropping SQX off at the royal capital, as well as his willingness to give SQX his spiritual power and the fan (regardless of the dire circumstances) shows that there’s a part of him that still cares about them. He has no desire to interfere with Qingxuan’s chances at happiness in their new life, precisely because of that affection, but he also doesn’t want to be around to grieve over what could have been. Because every time He Xuan sees SQX, there will only be regret, both for his inability to see SQX without the attached pain and for the friend (or even lover) he could have had had their fates not been so maliciously intertwined.

Yes, I love beefleaf, but what I love more than the ship are the incredibly written individuals themselves. And I do firmly believe that, in canon at least, they would both be more at peace by letting go and moving on. Not necessarily happy, but at peace.

Now, in another universe, where these two met outside of these circumstances? Beefleaf most certainly sails.

Side note: In a weird way, writing this was actually kinda cathartic because it gave me peace with and acceptance of beefleaf’s canon ending, while still acknowledging that these two definitely had the potential to be lovers. That potential can be (and already has been) explored through everyone’s lovely fan creations.

[a-shade-of-blue]

Hi everyone. Mohammed Khalil (@ahmed0khalil) has asked me to share his story, and I’m writing on his behalf. Mohammed created the donation campaign for his little brother 6-year-old Ahmed, and he aims to raise funds to evacuate his family of 8. You can see in his blog how much he loves and worries for 6-year-old Ahmed. Mohammed is only 19 years old. This is not normal. He should have been in school, not begging for our attention to try and raise enough funds so that they can buy food, water, medicine, and a chance to evacuate to safety.

In Gaza, where the sounds of bombing blend with the cries of children, Mohammed and Ahmed's family experienced days they never imagined they would endure. Mohammed (19) and Ahmed (6) have four other siblings: Fathi, Aya, Anas and Abdullah. Aya (21) is a uni nursing student and Anas (15) is also a school student. Neither of them can study anymore with the current genocide. This war is especially hard on Fathi (23), who is blind and suffering from coronary artery disease, Abdullah (11) who is autistic and does not understand what is happening, and Ahmed (6), a small child who had barely started kindergarten before his education came to a halt.

The destruction that struck the area left them with no place to live. The sounds of explosions fill the horizon, and the homes that once sheltered them have become piles of rubble. They suddenly found themselves outside their home, homeless.

The bombing not only destroyed their home, but also severely injured Mohammed. Mohammed was sitting at the entrance of the school his family was sheltering in when three bombs were dropped in front of him. The bombs destroyed a residential tower in front of Mohammed. Dust filled the air and the resulting rubble and shrapnel fell on Mohammed, injuring him in the leg. Mohammed was so severely wounded that he could not walk, and he had to lie there, hurt and bleeding, for 2 hours before the Palestinian Red Crescent came and carried him to the hospital.

The bombing shattered the glass in the school Mohammed and his family was staying at, but thankfully the children sustained no serious injuries. Soon after, they were asked to evacuate the school immediately as there were news that the IOF were going to bomb the Abbas prison near it. And so even though Mohammed was wounded, he could not rest and wait for his leg to heal, but had to leave again with his family.

Now they are living in a small tent in a refugee camp. Mohammed told me that they had to bathe in polluted water and the place smelled of sewage and corpses. Camp life was difficult not only because of the scarcity of food, the infectious disease, and the polluted water, but also because of the psychological torture they endure. Looking at all the devastation, and how the world seems indifferent to their suffering, Mohammed told me that they, including young innocent 6-year-old Ahmed, had begun to lose hope for a better future.

Internet is unstable and often lacking in the refugee camp. Mohammed is using the precious time when Internet is available to tell me his story. I hope you will not turn away their calls for help. They urgently need donations to provide for shelter, food, and medicine, as well as to evacuate out of Gaza. Donations are coming in really slowly for Mohammed’s campaign, and I beg all of you, please, don't turn a blind eye to his story. 

Mohammed’s campaign has been shared by 90-ghost and I’ve also been talking extensively with him. He is a very nice person and he just really wants to help his family survive. Please, please, help Mohammed evacuate himself, his 5 siblings and his parents! Little 6-year-old Ahmed does not deserve to live in fear of falling bombs every day, and neither does Mohammed and the rest of his family. 

Really low funds! Only €1,185 raised of €50,000 target!!

Please share/reblog and donate to help a family of 8! These are children we are talking about, and my heart breaks for what they have to endure.

Please follow Mohammed and Ahmed on @ahmed0khalil to get updates on their situation!

[hecksupremechips]

Shinjiro Aragaki 🤝 Rebecca Gales

Mom friends who constantly try telling others how they should live their lives and believe they know what’s best for everyone else who would explode and die if anyone did the same to them

[with-my-calamitous-love]

PUT ON YOUR RECORDS AND REGRET ME

katsuki bakugou x reader

should you open the door after all he’s done?

part 2/3

a/n: ty for all the love on part 1 🤍

not saying this is a major vent based off of personal experience but im not not saying that

inspired by high infidelity

to say you didn’t always have suspicions would be a lie. you didn’t want to believe them. broken locks, shifty text messages, numbers you didn’t always recognize, and the slight feeling of him pulling away. you didn’t think he’d actually do it. and honestly, neither did he.

alcohol does crazy things to a person. and so when you, your boyfriend, and all his friends decided to go out to a bar to celebrate his birthday, you knew it wasn’t going to be a tame night. but you didn’t think you’d go home, alone and crying, the scent of whiskey lingering on your clothes.

he bent the truth too far that night. he came to you in the morning, his hangover evident by his eye bags and poor choice of clothing. he still smelled like alcohol from the night before.

and despite all that, you still listened. listened to his story about how he was whisked away in a drinking game with kaminari and kirishima, and bakugou was supposedly the only one sober enough to take the two guys home. that made a convenient explanation as to why he left you all alone with no ride home.

and pathetically so, you wanted to believe him. despite the radio silence from everyone the everyone the previous night, the smell of perfume on his shirt that smelled too strong to be yours, and the taste of someone else when he kissed your lips.

and for each day after that, you learned more and more the many different ways you can kill the one you love. the worst way is never loving them enough.

it started by your calls going straight to voicemail- each time he’d say that his phone died while he was patrolling. then constantly needing to call kirishima, the only other person who knows him like you do, desperately needing help to manage his emotions. the redhead had infinite patience for your boyfriend, and you were thankful for that- but you also wondered what haunted bakugou so much that he couldn’t go to you for.

he wanted to play the role of the good guy, even if it was just that- a role. he wanted to be who you deserved, even after he earned a big black stain on his morality after the crime he committed. he wanted things to just be normal, but it couldn’t. he was lying through his teeth and you both knew it, and yet couldn’t say anything about it.

until april 29th. exactly 9 days after his birthday. 9 days after what he did.

he breaks it off quick. he tells you that he’s not treating you right, that he’s a shitty boyfriend and a shitty person. that he needs to be a better person and that he can’t make you wait for him. and so, katsuki bakugou leave safe and stranded.

and in a way, he was right. being a shitty boyfriend, being everything you don’t deserve was only a part of it- he knew that if he stayed with you any longer, the guilt from the truth would eat him alive. so selfishly, he chose to preserve himself and to let you hurt. that might have killed him more.

you didn’t even bother to get your things from his apartment. in fact, you couldn’t get out of bed. because you kneel you were lied too yet you didn’t want to revel in the truth. the truth that katsuki bakugou wasn’t just a shitty boyfriend, he was a shitty cheating boyfriend.

you denied everything for the days to come. you hoped it was all just some twisted dream, and that what happened wasn’t really happening. that was all so until the day you got a visit from a certain redhead.

it was a normal day. you were lounging in your apartment, needing time away from all the heartache in the world. you treated your suspicions like a secret. maybe if you didn’t think about it, it wouldn’t have actually happened. as if simple denial could erase reality.

the sun is setting when your doorbell rings. when you answer, its kirishima. your heart sinks, wondering why he’d be visiting you directly. you wanted to hope for the best, but you didn’t exactly know what to expect.

the redhead grimaces when he sees the way he breaks your heart. he knows he’s doing the right thing, but he hates how the right thing is causing you so much pain. he explains to you the truth of that night, behind katsuki’s sudden break up. how it wasn’t just because he felt like he wasn’t good enough- what he did actually proved that fear. kirishima explains how bakugou got absolutely shit-faced drunk, and how he went home with who was not, in fact, you. he tries to salvage it, by saying that katsuki didn’t hesitate to cut her off, to tell her it was a mistake and that he shouldn’t have done it. he was also quick to tell his best friend how god damn unmanly it was for him to cheat on you. he says that he couldn’t take it anymore watching you being lied even during the split.

“i’m so fucking sorry, [y/n].” he concludes his confession, his red eyes looking into yours. he hates that this is happening. he loves bakugou, and by extension he loves you, and he can’t stand the idea of this happening to his two favourite people in the world.

you don’t say much as he leaves. what could you say, anyway?

katsuki bakugou had cheated on you.

✧.* ⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ ✧.* ✧.* ⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ ✧.* ✧.* ⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ ✧.* ✧.* ⋆.˚

after your suspicions were confirmed, you finally mustered up enough courage to get out of bed. you went over to his apartment and quietly collected your things, your heart racing out of your chest just being in his presence. and of course, he tries to stop you. he knows you’ve learned the truth and it makes his stomach churn.

“fucking some other girl is one thing, but lying to me too.” you hiss, both of you wincing at the sound of your voice cracking under all the heart. his usual smart ass mouth is silent, knowing damn well he deserves the accusations. what hurts more is seeing the tears run down your face, dragging the mascara down your cheeks. “you told me it was for my own good. t-that you needed to work on yourself. not that you cheated!”

“…i didn’t wanna hurt you even more.” he finally admits, as if pleading guilty in front a judge. and you actually scoff.

“you coward.” you hiss.

“yeah, i’m a FUCKING coward, [y/n]! i know!” he raises his voice, but you’re too numb from the hurt to care. “i couldn’t live with myself! waking up next to you knowing i fucking betrayed you. i had to let you go. you deserved more than me!”

and honestly, you don’t know what to think. you’re so angry and hurt over the fact that he cheated on you, lied, and broke up with you all in the same month.

you could see the guilt eating him up from the inside. you could see how your tear stained face right now was killing him. his anger was like an anchor dug straight through his heart. you could see in his eyes he’s been wanting to tear his own skin off after what he did to you.

you hastily wipe your eyes dry, turning away from him and moving towards the front door. his legs that were glued to the ground finally move, catching your wrist just as your about to turn the door knob.

and you actually wait. you wait to see what he’ll say. you wait to hear all his shitty excuses, or even to taste his lips and taste something that isn’t you. deep down in your heart, you hope he fights for you. that he’ll fight to keep you around, to love you again.

what hurts the most is that he doesn’t.

“…get home safe, babe.”

you nod, eyes welling up again before exiting his apartment. the walk back down is silent, even as your good friend, shouto, opens the door for you. he drives you home, playing all the breakup songs he knows you love. he’s silent, but he knows its what you need right now.

once he pulls up to your driveway, he finally musters up the courage to speak.

“…i’m sorry, [y/n].”

his voice is so velvet, a stark contrast to your ex boyfriend’s. but honestly, everyones attempts to talk to you all seem futile. you sigh, looking over at your friend with tear stained eyes.

“you know the worst part?”

“whats the worst part?”

“…i think i still love him.”

and thats the worst part.

reminder that cheating is a horrible thing to do and love does not equal forgiveness. this is simply just fiction! 🪞

part 3 soon! 🪽

tags: 💿

@katsukified @theclassiccherry @the-dumpster-fire-of-life @kitkatlover015 @mia-luvs @mikestuffffs @sleepyk0dyz @blue-chup @sleepieenaps @devils-adversary @darling-eos @dilance-rock @jxstmxlly15 @suki0 @morganalatina21 @khadeejanaur @fictional-men-dum @pretty-sparkle-bomb @naladrawssss @whenanafallsinlove

[mazamba]

Baby Steps

Dani slurped her milkshake noisily as she shifted back to the visible spectrum, interrupting the argument between the so-called adults. It'd been a hectic week, she'd been part of Young Justice for less than a week, yet they already had a crisis in the form of a maybe-evil clone.

"Do you mind?" growled Batman.

"Try a different word."

Superman raised an eyebrow.

""Father" is too heavy, try "brother" instead," she continued, "I mean, Phantom's technically my dad, but I don't call him that. He's my 'cuz!"

"What we call each other isn't the problem."

"No, but it's less scary isn't it? Danny was fifteen when I met him. Imagine if I'd called him dad. He'd have freaked out!"

Batman nodded, seeing the logic.

"And even then, I kinda needed some time to put my head together, you know?" she rattled on, floating crisscross applesauce in midair like a balloon in the breeze, "It's the real reason I left the first time. Maybe some time apart would be good for them? Microdose in family!"

"What we call each other isn't even half of the problem," sighed Superman, "you're a clone too, right? You once told me it was weird to know things you didn't remember learning. Clones are made and programed, sometimes with sleeper programming."

"True, but that's what we're here for," she figured, "I mean, I can't take you on, but Superboy's a different story. If he does go nuts, he has the whole Junior League to take care of him."

"I can't ask you to put yourself in danger."

"You're not, I'm volunteering," figured Stray, finally floating down to the ground, "look, Phantom and I work because we took the time to figure out who we are to each other. You two need time to figure out what you are, not get shoved together and hope for the best."

Batman grunted.

"This is a shock, it was a shock for Danny too. Sa- A mutual friend told me he had a panic attack an hour after I left. Started looking into childcare and stuff. She had to stop him from running after me with a diaper bag and they both crashed into a tree. Tu- a different friend sent me a picture."

"Your point?" sighed the Bat.

"I just said it? Forcing things helps no one. Just... put them in general proximity of each other and let the cards lay where they may. I know what you want to help Superboy, but forcing them into a get along shirt is just gonna hurt them both. You have to think of Superman too."

"And if he does go rogue?"

"Then we stop him."

"That easy?"

"That easy."

Superman sighed. As much as he hated to admit it, the whole situation was a lot less scary by simply changing the word. And what Stray said made sense, in a roundabout sort of way.

For his part, Batman was mentally kicking himself for hyper-focusing on Superboy's needs without taking Clark's feelings into consideration.

"We'll go with your plan," he agreed, "Superman, I'll need you to have a word with Black Canary. She will mediate with you and Superboy whenever you wish to meet, but I need you both to agree to this before we move forward."

"And if we can't?"

"Then he'll have to get adopted into somewhere else," figured Dani, sitting in midair again, "nothing good will happen if we just dump him on you. Neither one of you deserve what happened."

---

I'm sick of people dumping on Clark. Considering how he and the others live, I can't blame him for being suspicious.

Some other guy got replaced by a clone that didn't even know he was a clone. It wouldn't be that weird for Connor to have sleeper programming.

If anything, this is on Batman and the others for trying to force a relationship.

[cressidagrey]

Lightning in the Bottle - Chapter 7

Summary: 

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was actually pretty much useless. The only thing she wanted was to be somebody's first choice for once in her life.

Also known as: Azriel's shadows decide that if he doesn't treat his mate right... they'll just do it for him.

Warnings: 

shadows playing the lottery, lots of fluff, Nyx being unconsolable...

(super pretty dividers by @tsunami-of-tears)

It was quiet in the house. He didn’t know where Mor or Amren had disappeared to, though he knew that if he asked, the shadows would already know. They were still furious with both of them. 

Madja was still with Eira…Nesta with her…

Which left Rhys and Feyre to supervise Elain in her room, packing. 

They were also supervised by shadows lurking in every corner of that room. Even when Azriel had told them off for that…They weren’t ready to leave well enough alone. Of course, they weren’t. They were so angry…so furious…complaining under their breath about how Elain had tried to take this future from them. 

So was Azriel. 

So angry that he didn’t trust himself…

So he was sitting on the floor next to Eira’s door, sharpening Truthteller. The calm and steadying movement was supposed to calm him. Repeating, again and again…

All they managed was to make him even more angry. 

Cassian kept him company, watching him silently, but Azriel ignored that. 

And then the door was opened and Nesta stood there, hands on her hips. “You should come inside,” she told him drily. “Don’t just lurk outside the doorway.”

“I have no right to be there,” he responded, his voice flat. 

Absolutely none. Not after…Not after how she had felt and he hadn’t realised it. Not after he had hurt her with his actions, even when he hadn’t wanted to. Not after…Not after what happened to her. 

He had no right to be in her rooms, to even look at her…no right whatsoever. 

“Don’t you?” Nesta challenged him sharply. “You’re her mate,” she pointed out, raising one eyebrow. 

Her mate. 

He couldn’t help but snort. “Brilliant mate I was, Nesta,” he told her sharply. “I deserve to never ever look at her again for what I put her through.” 

“So it’s alright for your shadows to take care of her, but yourself is where you draw that line?”

He blinked, outright staring at Nesta who was staring him down. Her eyes, the most similar to Eira’s out of all her sisters…were fixing him with a glare. 

“What?” He repeated. The shadows…they had been…

“Your shadows. They helped me change her into a nightgown. They knew where everything was in her room. They brushed and braided her hair,” Nesta clarified. “I thought you sent them.”

He hadn’t sent them. 

He hadn’t even thought of it. 

But clearly, they had once again…decided that they knew better. 

“Have they gone off on their own again?” Cassian asked with some amusement. It wasn’t the first time…wouldn’t be the last time either that they had decided to… fulfil Azriel’s direct orders and do something else as well… something that they thought would be much more useful. 

Most of the time he couldn’t find it in himself to be angry at them for it, because they had never been outright wrong. 

“They do that?” Nesta asked, surprised colouring her voice. 

“Sometimes,” he admitted, glaring darkly at one tendril of shadows that was darting into the room. 

What were you thinking? he demanded of them mentally. 

Well, if you weren’t going to shape up, we clearly needed to, the shadows answered flippantly. You’re welcome. We took care of our mate when you didn’t. 

That hit the intended spot. 

Azriel growled as he followed them into Eira’s room, as they darted inside. He could nearly feel their amusement and just one moment later, he realised that they had absolutely played his instincts. 

Insinuate that he didn’t take care of his mate and that they needed to do his work for him. The worst part was how right they were.

Nesta just snorted.

“Do I want to know what they just told you?” she asked drily as she went back to perching herself on a chair on Eira’s bedside, Madja still fluttering around. 

Eira. 

Laying in that bed, curled up beneath blankets and pillows…looking so delicate and breakable there with skin even peeler than usual, no colour in usual rosy lips…no blush on her cheeks. 

Lifeless and exhausted. 

Cassian followed behind him, even as he stopped in the middle of the room, freezing in place. 

“No,” he disagreed mulishly, glaring at the shadows once again as he watched them fuss over Eira. Pulling her blanket just a bit higher there…pulling her hair out of her face there…all of it things that he wished he would be the one doing. 

But he wasn’t. 

“They have been quite helpful for once,” Madja commented with some amusement. “I have never seen them fetch bandages for anybody but you,” she pointed out, before growing serious. “If she’s your mate, you should stay. You’ll make it easier for her to find her way back.” 

He could just silently nod at that. 

And so he sat down against the wall next to the door, where he could watch her, see the rise and fall of her chest…watch her suffer through the worst of the fever, even when Nesta gently wiped away the sweat beading at her brow, as Madja packed her bag. 

“I’ll be back in the morning,” Madja promised them, seeming less concerned. “She’s strong.”

She was. So fucking strong and none of them had seen it. 

“Do you actually have control over the shadows?” Nesta asked him suddenly. “Or is it just…” she trailed off. 

“It’s a battle of wills,” Azriel admitted quietly. Sometimes more than what he was ready to admit. “But if I had no control over them, they would have already driven me insane.”

It wasn’t a lie. 

There was a reason why most shadowsingers didn’t grow old. 

“I can silence them if the need arises. I can pull them back,” Azriel explained with a sigh. “If I didn’t…”He trailed off, leaving Nesta to make her own connections. 

“You told them to let off Elain, didn’t you?” Nesta said quietly. He just inclined his head. “If you hadn’t…Can they…kill?”

“They can and they have,” Cassian answered for him, gently reaching out to touch his mate’s shoulder, having crossed the room to stand behind her. “But they don’t do it without very good reasons, Nes. They would never…hurt you.”

“They wouldn’t,” Azriel agreed. 

“But they had one, didn’t they?” Nesta asked him with a sigh and he just nodded, staring at Eira. “How good?”

He swallowed. 

How good indeed…

“Very good,” Rhys said quietly as he entered the room. “They had a very good reason, Nesta. Elain had a vision of the future…of Azriel and Eira and she decided that it couldn’t come to pass,” he explained quietly. 

*This is between you and Eira and nobody else,* Rhys told him softly, privately and Azriel said nothing, but the gratitude nearly burst in his chest.

“Lucien took Elain back to Day with him,” Rhys continued. “I sent a letter with him, explaining the entire situation to Helion…we’ll see how that shakes out. Now…I’ll try to take her pain away again…and hopefully won’t end up in her memories, again.”

“Are you sure you can do that?” Cassian asked, but Rhys just inclined his head. 

“I think that’s the least of what I owe her,” Rhys answered quietly, as he sat down on a chair on Eira’s other side, closing his eyes and concentrating. 

Cassian watched it for a moment, then shrugged and went to her bookcase, to the armchair that stood there…picking up the dress that lay on it. 

“Be careful,” Nesta said, her voice sharp.

Cassian looked up surprised by her tone of voice but was indeed very careful when he picked up that dress…red and silver silk, sliding to the floor in his grasp.“Nes, what…”

Only then Azriel saw the silver flames decorating the fabric. 

It was beautiful. A work of art. Like somebody had taken Nesta and Cassian and made it into a dress fitting for a Queen. 

“She made it for me,” Nesta whispered. “Eira made me a wedding dress, Cassian. And she never gave it to me, because I told her that…I told her that all the dresses she made were ugly.”

Ugly. The dresses that Eira made weren’t ugly. They were beautiful. Always fitting the owner so well, decorated with embroidery, her stitching perfect and even…They were beautiful.

And Nesta had said that and Eira had taken it seriously because of course, she had. Because everything anybody had said to her, went straight to her heart. To that sweet and soft heart. 

“Nes…she knows you love her,” Cassian said, as he returned to his mate’s side in just a few steps. “You’ll apologise and she’ll forgive you.”

“And what if she doesn’t?” Nesta snapped. “She has no reason to forgive me. She has no reason to forgive any of us.” 

That was true. 

She had no reason to forgive any of them. 

But Eira…Eira had the softest heart he had ever come across. She would forgive Nesta. Of course, she would. With time, she would forgive the sister she loved so much. 

Azriel would spend the rest of his life making sure that her forgiving nature wouldn’t be taken advantage of. 

It was all he could do. 

“I told Rhys that Elain was the prettier one anyway so she didn’t need to come with us to Hewn City. She overheard. ” Cassian admitted with a grimace. “If she won’t forgive one of us, it will be me, sweetheart. At least you said that in one of your darkest moments. I am 500 years old and I was still stupid enough to say that,” Cassian seethed.  “ I am surprised she held out this long,” Cassian added quietly “I wouldn’t have. I probably would have told all of us to fuck off well before now.”

It was making him furious to hear all of this…hear what they had said to or about his mate. But this wasn’t about him. It wasn’t. It was about Eira. 

Even when the shadows seemed to be furious at Cassian’s words. 

A pretty face can’t hide a rotten character, they hissed aloud, loud enough for Cassian to hear, who flinched at the sound. 

“They are right,” Rhys said quietly, eyes opening carefully. “I got her,” he promised Azriel quietly, at his questioning gaze. “She’s just resting. She doesn’t feel any pain.”

It was something, he supposed.

It was only at that moment, that Azriel nearly flinched at the blood-curdling scream that came from Nyx’s room. 

So loud that even they could hear it a floor up. Crying. “Ra! Ra! Ra!”

“How much did he see, you think?” Cassian asked, Rhys just shook his head. 

“I don’t know,” he admitted, a grimace on his face. 

It was silent in the room as they listened to Feyre trying to soothe him, to shush him and to stop crying but the deep, tearful sobs still carried through the quiet house, and they even seemed to get louder. 

His head snapped up when he realised that Feyre was bringing her son up. 

“I can’t get him to stop,” Feyre whispered as she entered the room, her eyes tearful as she gazed at her sister, laying in that bed. “I…”

“It’s alright,” Rhys promised her quietly. “Just lay him next to her. She won’t wake up…and he needs this, I think.”

The Princeling always takes his afternoon naps like this when he is with her, the shadows whispered to Azriel, something that he had seen outside in the garden on more than one occasion during the summer months…Nyx stretched out on a blanket, with Eira laying next to him, softly singing or stitching…sometimes quietly tending to the tiny vegetable spot she had commandeered that Elain had let her have, that didn’t destroy the garden’s design…

As Feyre did as Rhys said, Nyx stared at Eira with tearful blue eyes and then latched onto her shoulder, throwing one pudgy little arm over her chest so that he could hold onto her…burying his face against the soft flesh of her arm. 

“Ra Ra,” Nyx sobbed softly, quietening down right then and there…It was so clear who was Nyx's favourite. 

Of course, she was. Eira had taken care of him so very often, whenever Rhys of Feyre with Court business, Eira had taken him…had sat with him and rocked him to sleep…

“She’ll be fine, my love,” Rhys said quietly to Feyre, who just nodded, wiping away tears. 

“Sing?” Nyx murmured at that moment, a yawn overtaking his face, already drifting off to sleep. “Sing, Ra Ra?”

“She sings to him?” Rhys said surprised. 

She does, the shadows agreed. Human nursery rhymes. The ones that were the High Lady’s favourites. 

Even Azriel hadn’t known that little tidbit…that she sang, yes. That they were Feyre’s favourites…no. 

“How are we supposed to explain this to Eira?” Feyre asked at that moment. “She’s…Elain is her twin sister. She’s going to be devastated, Nesta,” Feyre whispered. “How are we…”

“We’ll tell her the truth,” Nesta said, crossing her arms, one hand tightly wrapped around Cassian’s still. “We’ll tell her the truth…we owe her that much…and we’ll weather her anger. And if she wants to talk to Elain…”

“We’ll let her,” Rhys said quietly. “That’s not our decision to make.”

Azriel wanted to bristle at that, even when he knew that Rhys was right. 

Still, he wished to wrap Eira up in his wings and bring her far, far away…far away from Elain. 

He wanted to beg on his knees for her forgiveness and spend the rest of his life making it up to her, in whatever way she saw fit. He wanted all of that. 

Even when he didn’t deserve her. He still wanted that. 

And so they sat there in silence, watching Nyx and Eira sleep quietly on that bed…and the shadows swirl around the desk. 

Azriel watched as a pile of packages started to arrive, the shadows starting to open and unpack them quickly and efficiently. 

“What are they doing?” Nesta asked, staring at them. 

Azriel just raised an eyebrow in question as the shadows started putting away…stuff. 

Eira went shopping, Master, they said primly, loud enough for Nesta’s benefit. Like that answered all the questions he had. 

“She went shopping? Who’s paying for this?” he asked, because he was having a…feeling that that wasn’t the whole story. 

We did. The shadows admitted drily. 

“They have money?!” Feyre asked, sounding shocked. Cassian just snorted. 

“Didn’t you know? Azriel is loaded,” Cassian answered with a chuckle. “The shadows like playing the lottery.”

Nesta started laughing, the sound shocking in the quiet room. “Please tell me that is a joke,” she chortled but Azriel just sighed. 

“I got them to stop stacking the odds in their own favour, but getting them to stop completely wasn’t worth the hassle,” he admitted weakly. 

[latenightdaydreams]

Hi, im having a hard Time, and thought about a Kong scenario, where reader goes to Best friend könig crying cause her boyfriend asked her for a Time/break up, so könig consoles her (you know what I mean) and sends a video of the two of them to reader's ex

I hope things get better for you, whatever it is that you're going through. Know you deserve the best in life and love. Please remember to care for yourself and I hope you have a great day/night💖

More Than Friends (fem)

MDNI🔞

Master List ✍🏽

>cw: fem/afab, oral, p in v, recording

1.8k word count

📹

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The second König heard your voice on the phone call, he knew what you were going to say happened. While his heart breaks to hear you like this, he’s relieved to hear that toxic man is officially out of your life. He rushed out of his office to the garage, jumping into his SUV before rushing to be by your side.

You lay on your couch in a ball sobbing. This isn’t how you expected your day to go and you’re completely blindsided by your boyfriend’s decision to end things. König is the only person you know would be there for you without judgment, someone that can help distract you from the pain.

About thirty minutes later, there is a knock at your front door. You stand to answer it, wiping your tears onto your oversized t-shirt. On the other side of the door, König stands with his mask off, a bouquet of your favorite flowers, and a box of candies. He has a soft smile on his face as his eyes land on your sad, puffy face.

“Liebling.” König steps forward and wraps his arms around you, bringing you in for a fight embrace. “Come on, let’s go sit.”

König closes and locks your front door, his eyes following your body as you walk to your bedroom. He follows you and sits with you on the edge of your bed, placing the flowers and candy on the nightstand next to him. As he turns his body to face you, he looks over your face with a small smile on his lips.

“You want to talk or cuddle?” He asks, knowing that sometimes you just need to be held.

“Snuggles, please.”

König nods, leaning back onto the bed against your pillows. You climb on the bed snuggling up to him, resting your head on his chest; his massive arms wrap tightly around you. He peppers kisses on the top of your head, enjoying having you this close. It will hurt for now, but in the long run, you’re better off without him. Eventually, you’ll see it too.

“I just feel so stupid.” Your voice cracks as you speak.

“You aren’t stupid. He is, has always been. You’re much better off without him in your life,” König says comfortingly. He moves his fingers to your cheeks to wipe away tears that stain your soft skin.

You tilt your head up to look at him. His pale blue eyes meet yours with a warm smile across his thin lips. He continues to caress your face, enjoying having your body pressed against his. “Don’t look at me with those eyes.” König chuckles softly.

A soft giggle escapes your lips, the first time you’ve smiled since the breakup. Your eyes linger on his for a while. He’s always been soothing to you. His voice, smell, touch. Without warning, you move up slightly and press your lips against his.

König moves his hand from your cheek to the back of your head, holding you into the kiss. Sparkes flow throughout his whole body, he’s been wanting to kiss you for years. While he loves this, he pulls back, wanting to make sure that you’re okay with this.

“Liebling, I don’t want you to make impulsive decisions in the heat of the moment.” His eyes study your face trying to read your expression.

“I’ve wanted this for a long time.” You assure him. It’s true. There has always been a feeling between the both of you, but neither has ever made a move due to being nervous about ending the friendship.

That’s all the König needed to hear; he leans back into the kiss. One hand slips down to your body, squeezing your hip, pressing you against his body. Slowly, he creeps his hand up your side and moves underneath your baggy shirt. He’s pleasantly surprised to find your breasts free without the confines of a bra, cupping one in his large palm and sliding his thumb over your nipple.

“Let me make you feel better, Liebling. Just lay there and enjoy the pleasure.” His lips begin to trail down your jawline to your neck, leaving sloppy open mouth kisses in his wake. In a slow fluid motion, he pushes you on to your back.

König grabs the hem of your shirt with his teeth, lifting it up until your stomach is exposed. Instantly, his lips continue the trail of messy kisses over your body. His hands continue to push up your shirt until your breasts are in full view for him.

“Schön.” He whispers as he leans down and kisses around one of your areolas, licking your nipple with a small flick. The moan that he hears from you pushes him to continue. His lips wrapping around your nipple and suckling while his other hand comes up and squeezes the other breast. In an instant he changes direction and kisses back down your stomach, nipping at your skin as he goes down.

“May I?” König has his fingers wraps around your waist band.

Your eyes meet his, nodding your head. His fingers pull down the elastic of your leggings and underwear. He swallows hard as his eyes fall on your soft mound, instinctively licking his lips as he grows excited to finally be able to taste your cunt.

König leans back in the bed, pulling your leggings all the way off your stunning legs. He holds your right leg up kissing from your ankle up to your thigh. You watch with eager eyes, every kiss feeling euphoric on your sensitive flesh. There is no time wasted as he reaches your pussy. Your natural musk consumes his nostrils, his body has never craved something so much.

Your right leg rests on König’s shoulder as he lowers himself between your thighs. His tongue sticks out, parting your wet folds with his tongue. The second he tastes a drop of you, he drives in. His face becomes squashed between your supple thighs. You brush your fingers through his blonde hair, letting out loud moans of ecstasy. Sucking your clit into his mouth, he moves his head back, letting you go with a pop.

König gently removes your leg from his shoulder and sits up right. He quickly pulls his shirt off, going into his pants pocket to remove his cellphone and place it on the bed next to the two of you. A lustful gaze consumes him as he looks you up and down.

“That man is a fool for letting you go.” He says finally pulling his pants down and tossing them off to the side. You can see his boner straining against the fabric of his boxer briefs, he’s absolutely massive. König can see your eyes widen as he pulls down his underwear. His heavy cock springing free.

“Wow…”

A cocky grin plays at König’s lips as he watches you. “Big, ja?” He chuckles as he positions himself between your thighs.

With his large hands, he grabs both on your legs and spreads them open. He slaps his cock on your wet pussy, letting out a sigh at the feeling of your wet warmth simply touching him. His eyes focus on yours as he lines himself up with your entrance, he wants to see the pleasure on your face once he slips in.

As he pushes his hips forward, he can feel your tight cunt squeeze around him, struggling to accept him. Your face scrunches with pleasure as König buries himself deep inside. Your hands reach out for the bedsheets, holding on tightly.

“Oh, fuck!” Your moan is almost a scream.

König’s eyes drop down to your pussy, watching the way your lips stretch to accommodate his size. “I bet your little ex would be devastated to see you’re celebrating the break up with your best friend's monster cock.” He teases as he pulls back, slamming himself inside of you again.

“He’d…cry.” You try to joke but the pleasure is simply too overwhelming. Pathetic mewls flee from you with every single thrust forward. His pace is slow but harsh.

“Maybe we should send him a little video and show him how to actually please a woman.”

You blush at his suggestion, but the thought of possibly hurting him felt too good. You know his cock is less than average and has a delicate ego. He was always insecure about your friendship with someone like König so, why not?

König grabs his cellphone after you give him the ‘ok’. He pulls open his camera app and holds it up. On the screen he focuses on your creamy cunt already beginning to gush around König. One finger taps the screen and records himself.

“Fucking perfect tight pussy. All mine.” His words almost come out in a growl as his pace quickens. He pulls back, slamming himself into you, causing you to let out the most desperate pleas to be fucked König has ever heard. “There you go, Liebling. Beg for me.”

He records the way your breasts sway in rhythm with his motion, your hands not knowing what to do as you cling on to him and the bed for support. Your velvety walls suck him in and squeeze him as his cock bullies its way in and out of you.

König pulls out quickly to prop the cell phone up on your night stand, making sure he can still see the two of you. He quickly climbs back on your bed, man handling you so effortlessly as he turns you over. Your ass props up in the air as your face rests on the soft bed underneath you.

He shoves himself back into you, hands gripping your ass tightly as he begins to buck forward into you. Instantly, you feel yourself flutter around him.Your head lifts up as you cry out in pleasure, one of his hands reaching around the front of your neck and pulling you back to him.

“König! Fuck!”

“Ja, scream my name, Liebling.” His voice is shaky as he tries to breathe. He focuses on ruining you for any other man. Especially so your ex can’t try to come back and take you from him.

“König!”

You moan out his name like a mantra. Your legs tremble, body becoming tense as a steady trickle drips from your body, wetting your bed. “Oh, my god!” Panting and eyes rolling back, König doesn’t let up for you to recover.

Your ex sits in his room, stood up by the woman he was cheating on you with, with tears burning his eyes. He can’t seem to look away as he watches your best friend, König, make your squirt multiple times. Seeing you move on so quickly hurts him, but what’s worse is knowing he can’t compare to König. The primal way you moan, eagerly suck König’s cock…he’s never seen you act that way before.

He quickly tries to call you once the video is over, pacing back and forth in his room with adrenalin flowing through his body. The line rings twice before he’s greeted with a thick Austrian accent on the other end.

“Hallo?” König’s voice sounds smug.

[paraphwrites]

so we all know edwin was in hell and charles was abused by his father. both were in horrible, violent situations, and neither deserved it. but i think the way they do (and do not) talk about their experiences are very revealing.

because, edwin brings up hell every five minutes. he plays the trauma olympics like a pro. and he's comfortable doing that because he knows he didn't deserve it. but he never talks about the actual details of went on in hell, only that it was absolutely awful. because though he is incredibly open about the fact that he went through a traumatic situation, he is very closed about the details of that traumatic situation. this is likely because he was raised in the edwardian era, and, well, people were hardly open about the details in their emotions at that time. and i think the fact that edwin never really talks about it means he's likely never really processed it. in the case of the light leapers, he sees a babydoll head in the gift shop and turns it around while visibly afraid. he has these residual, lingering fears, and they are never addressed, because he never actually addresses them. he has either fooled everyone around him into thinking that by mentioning hell, he is processing it, or charles is just so determined to be peppy that edwin is able to flit around, solving cases, while no one ever questions the depths of the impact hell had on him.

now, charles, on the other hand? you have to pry the fact that charles is traumatized out of his cold dead mouth. he will jump through all sorts of hoops, wave away all sorts of questionable comments, because he doesn't know he didn't deserve it. having an abusive parent is different from something traumatic happening to you. edwin has full confidence throughout the entire show that he does not deserve hell, that it is a clerical error. but charles? the person who is supposed to love and protect him at all costs is hurting him. and we know that he was physically abusive, but like, we don't know the details of what else went down, coz charles never talks about it. & charles never talks about it, and i'm gonna take a gander that it's likely because he is embarrassed and ashamed because he thinks he did something to deserve it. AND because charles feels this pressure to balance out edwin always talking about his trauma. so between the guilt from thinking being abused was his fault, & the guilt of bringing the group's morale down, charles absolutely never discusses his trauma. and, most of the time, that's ok, coz he's able to jump around from adventure to adventure without ever having to process his death.

edwin copes with being alone in his trauma for years by talking about it all the time in a casual manner, as if it's not properly a big deal. he doesn't have too much guilt attached to ending up in hell -he understands it was not his fault- and subsequently, is comfortable being open about it's existence.

charles copes with being abused by his father by hiding it away and pretending it didn't happen, because he has so much guilt and complicated feelings about it that he is not able to talk about it in a casual matter, and he thinks that, if he did, he would be judged for it.

[snaillock]

would you do satosugu discovering their "friend" (both of them have a fatass crush on m!reader) is a teen dad, and just all of them chaotically taking care of a baby. (like those collage students raising a baby tiktoks?)

ok so technically i only write for blue lock buttttttttttt… i am more than willing to make an exception for this. this is also my favorite niche of satosugu fics so im super honored someone requested it from me

tags: male reader has a foster daughter bc hell yeah girl dads, unnamed child bc that's too much for me, reader is a sorcerer, found family but in a janked up kinda way, whipped satosugu, pre-hidden inventory so everyone is in high school in this this a long one yall

part two coming soon!

★ when assigned an extremely harsh mission, you find an orphaned child barely a year old within all the rumble. you soon found out her family was recently killed in the destruction. unsure of what would happen to her after this, you decided to take her as your own.

★ scared of any judgment, you didn’t tell anyone about her so only a few higher-ups were aware. luckily you were allowed to live off campus so you two could have more space and privacy.

★ however the physical effects of raising a kid all on your own at such a young age were certainly showing. you came to school visibly worn down, often falling asleep in the middle of class and taking more absences than usual.

★ the first people to notice, of course, were gojo and geto. as nosy as they were, they tried not to push it, knowing you had just come back from a really taxing mission. though they did get more and more suspicious whenever you didn’t let them visit your new place.

★ however one day, they did spot you out in public wearing a baby carrier with, of course, a baby they’d never seen before resting right inside. they immediately came up to you and bombarded you with multiple questions before you got them to chill out and explained everything.

★ wanting you to take some time off (and win you over), they offer to take care of her regularly. who were you to refuse? after all, it is free babysitting and you were already using up so much money hiring actual babysitters.

★ during their first babysitting job, you thanked them profusely before going back into your room and instantly falling asleep the moment your body hit your bed, taking a very well-deserved nap.

★ you see, gojo was already pretty hesitant about you having a kid around. this was before he took in megumi so he found basically any child gross and annoying. (though he’s somehow even more attracted to you now that you’re a dad.)

★ coughs dilf lover gojo i mean what?

★ so when gojo picked up your baby for the first time, she immediately cried when they made eye contact and he got so so personally offended that he started rethinking this whole babysitting thing.

★ the first thirty minutes or so of taking care of your kid went pretty okay. that was until she started crying again and neither of them knew why.

★ you see, these idiots have no idea how to care for a child.

★ they frantically tried to calm her down and figure out what was wrong without needing to wake you. they checked if she was hurt in any way, she definitely wasn’t hungry since they already fed her, nor did she need to be changed. gojo even called shoko to see if she could do anything.

★ when they eventually saw her crawling towards your room and sobbing right outside your door, hesitantly let her in to see her climb onto your bed and lay down with you, realizing she just missed you the whole time. that entire experience made them so exhausted that they almost climbed into bed with you. but when they saw the gratitude on your face after you woke up, it made it all worth it.

★ luckily the next few times they watched over her, babysitting got more and more easy as she grew used to them.

★ they start coming over so often to look after her that your place basically becomes their second home.

★ geto is in charge of doing her hair since the last time gojo attempted it, it was just a big mess of hair ties and ribbons. geto’s definitely not complaining since he loves to get her ready. in fact, geto does a lot of the responsible stuff when taking care of her since gojo, hmm what’s a nice way to put it, lacks a lot of the necessary skills.

★ oh yeah, remember what i said about gojo hating younger children? yeah, that completely changes as he spends more time with your daughter. he’s almost always playing with her or showing up with a brand new toy or stuffed animal just for her. he ends up loving her so so much and wants to be her cool fun dad.

★ unfortunately both of them are way too nice when it comes to disciplining her. they let her get away with so much. late bedtimes, too much tv, grabbing any treats she wants off the grocery store shelves. how can they not spoil such an adorable little girl like her!?

★ what’s also unfortunate is how they try to drag you into it.

“come on, y/n. let loose a little. cake for dinner does sound pretty appetizing right now.”

“come on. just let her watch ten more minutes before bed.” gojo lazed on the couch with her on his lap. “besides this cartoon is starting to get good.”

“come onnn… just let her buy it.” geto held up a sparkly pink dress you already told him she doesn’t need with his own sparkles in his eyes. “she’ll look so cute in it. i promise i’ll pay you back.”

★ their hearts explode whenever you’re affectionate with her. they love the way you gently rock her in your arms while humming a sweet lullaby, slowly lulling her to sleep. the way they see you kiss her forehead after placing her into the crib before quickly turning around and acting like they weren’t staring the whole time. they fall head over heels for you for probably the twentieth time by now since they met you but those times were definitely the hardest.

★ they’ve been in her life for a good while so when she begins talking more frequently, she starts calling them her papas as she does with you. gojo aka former “ugh kids are so gross and icky” feels his heart combusting whenever she calls him that and he owns that title proudly. meanwhile geto feels so endeared and honored that she sees him that way.

★ “we’re not the stepdads. we’re the dads that stepped up!” looking asses.💀

★ the secret of you having a kid doesn’t last for long since these two can’t keep quiet about it. they’re just way too happy and want to show her off. especially gojo who scrolls through 100s of photos of her while gushing about her to basically anyone who’ll listen. shoko and nanami are the most common targets whenever this happens.

★ he even ends up showing photos of you and your daughter napping together (that you had no idea he took), making you snatch his phone away in embarrassment.

★ whenever you guys go out on family dates to go to the beach or picnicking, geto always takes the time to dress her up with pretty hairstyles and cute little outfits. he absolutely loves doting on her.

★ they love her with all their hearts and would do absolutely anything for her. she’s so lucky to have three weird dads take care of her and raise her. a very odd and… unconventional family dynamic but an amazing one nonetheless. this family only grows bigger and bigger once gojo takes in megumi and geto practically adopts mimiko and nanako.

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ayo we rocking with the star bullet points?? 🗣️⁉️

[moonsaver]

Okay, honestly, I'm still reeling from the entire penacony quest, but here's my take on Sunday so far;

He's manipulative, obviously.

But like.. the type that's kind of hesitant from time to time because he's still sincere to a degree. At least, when it comes to his loved ones.

So, I guess that hesitance decreases a lot if you're just some nobody. Even then, Sunday does want the better for everyone, too. It just means that others may bear the brunt of it for the most part before being able to get ahold of it.

Also, at the very least, even if some people suffer, at the end Sunday believes they will reach where they want to, after. In that case, however, Sunday suffers far more than them, without actually ever reaching his own destination or idea of paradise.

However, this view is a bit distorted. Sunday believes to be "sacrificing" himself, shouldering loneliness and burdens in order to uphold everyone else's "paradise". But to the others, he's simply a tyrant overruling everyone's will with his own idea of Order.

Sunday deeply cares. He cares too much. That's kind of the problem.

A bit of self-destructing tendencies when pushed too far, I guess.

Lets ignore logic established by the quest for a second (because i literally am still reeling from it)

Imagine Sunday first discovers this possibility. He's terrified of it, but at the same time, he truly thinks this is humanity's salvage – for everyone who has deeply suffered. He thinks of you.

You who have had your fair share of pain, who confides in him late at night in the quiet of your privacy, hushed voices like silenced by a thick blanket through the wall.

You deserve to live a sweeter life. He thinks. No. You deserve more. He knows.

The first person he ever wants to step into this paradise – you.

Now, although Sunday was defeated in the end, we all know that unfortunately, our ragtag team had to wake up again because defeating him first was a dream. This means at some point, Sunday did succeed.

And after everyone wakes, you don't. You continue sleeping soundly. So does Sunday.

The rest of the world can return to their miserable, bitter lives outside of this dream; but Sunday will be damned if he's letting you go. Perhaps.. it's not a selfless wish, anymore. Perhaps at this point, Sunday desperately, selfishly, grips onto you with the latches of a sweet, deep dream. One where he was fatally destined to never reach, only to control from the waking world. Now that everyone else has woken, he wants to return to the dream. He wants to return to you, who he has so lovingly entrenched deep into it.

Also, Robin. Im in SO much pain... PLEASW..

Do you guys think.. even if Robin was vehemently resistant against Sunday's ideas..

Even though Sunday knew she wouldn't stand for it..

Do you guys think.. he wanted her to also join him at the end and enjoy the "Paradise" he created aswell?

Do you think he would have wanted Robin to stop worrying about everything, to take rest, to finally come home, and sing to her heart's content inside the dream? The dream where they set the bird free? The dream where Sunday still has a sweet tooth? The dream where she never has to wear elaborate neck-pieces? The dream where neither of them was hurt? Where neither of them left each other?

Oh...ogh. . My heart.

Sunday would be such a scary lover, too.

I mean even normally, I don't think a relationship with him would be that healthy

Particularly because it seems so healthy

If reader was in a relationship with normal sunday, I mean.. it's gonna at least appear healthy and normal, even to them. It's probably just Sunday having to constantly burden himself with all the dirty strings he has to pull, the quiet rush of water when he washes his hands before caressing the side of your face, the tight, closed smile he would give if you ever asked him what was wrong.. he can't let you know.

I think he'll take a yandere route in an established relationship if you do happen to find out what's been going on behind the scenes. He'll have to calm you down, and you promise you won't peep about it. The build up is almost invisible, because things seem to go back to the way they were. Before Sunday starts acting a bit.. restless. That would be when his yan! Tendencies would start kicking in, for a variety of reasons.

I feel like y'know, out of all the hsr cast, he's one of the characters who is genuinely very close to becoming a yandere canonically. Control freak? Check. Twisted ideals? Check. Unchecked power? Check. Hypnotization/manipulation? Check.

Also, the slight difference of his color pallete as opposed to Robin's.

His is much more washes out than Robin's. It's more "duller" but also more professional, and the gold of his halo is more colder than the warmer tone of Robin's halo. They both still have white/grey as a major color in their palletes, but Sunday's is accompanied by deep navy blues, or washed out blues. Robin's is very vibrant and purple. The only blue segment of her pallete is her hair, and it's remarkably more vibrant than Sunday's.

Also.. Sunday's whole ideas on "weak" and "strong"

Of course, it wasn't all correct, but that doesn't mean they didn't hold some semblance of sense.

Regardless, this playing with yan! Tendencies..... HOOOOO boy

So many thoughts. Sunday manipulating his partner is quite possibly the most common theme in them.

[d1xonss]

Cigarettes After Sex

✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Reader

✧ Era : Season 11

✧ Pronouns : she/her

✧ Genre : ⚠️ Smut (18+) and a lil bit of angst

✧ Word Count : 5.6k

AN ~ Not a request but I had this idea that I just couldn't get out of my head. Plus I've been in the mood to write something a little spicy since you guys liked the Older oneshots so much. Hope you enjoy!

Your eyes stayed focused on the pages of the book you were reading in front of you in the smoke filled garage, occasionally turning the pages to continue on with the chapter. In the background you could hear the tools clinking around, along with a few curses that fell from his lips when he couldn’t get something just right. Every once and a while you couldn’t help but look up and stare at him for a few seconds, knowing the real reason you came out here to keep him company while he worked.

Over the past twelve, long years you had known Daryl, you still didn’t exactly know what you were to each other. Some would call the two of you friends, and though that may be true, you always knew there was something a little more there than what meets the eye. And you knew he felt it too, but neither of you were willing to admit that out loud. Too hardheaded, you supposed.

It always caught your attention when he left a few lingering touches on your skin, how he embraced you so dearly as if you were the most important person in the world, or even how he occasionally left a small kiss on your forehead. You couldn’t help but think he did all of these things for a reason, as if to ease you into something that he was always terrified of. And hell, maybe he was easing himself into it too.

You always knew he was never much of a romantic person, he never quite showed interest in anyone else the way he always did with you. Though when he finally did open his heart up to a woman named Leah all those many years ago, he got absolutely crushed in the process, leaving you heartbroken for him as you witnessed him go through it all. In the back of your mind, you hoped it would work out between the two of them because you knew he deserved someone that would treat him right. And though that person may not have been you, it didn’t matter, as long as he was happy. That’s all you had ever wanted for him.

However, you couldn’t help but notice ever since he got hurt, he had been slowly pulling away from you. Not in a way that was drastic, but you always seemed to notice the little things. He had completely stopped showing you affection whatsoever which was very out of character for him considering how close you were. All of the little things he used to do that would make you smile, he had brought to a halt without warning. The only thing that he really did now was just a small squeeze on your shoulder, and that’s only if you were lucky.

It frustrated you slightly, not because of his sudden wall he built up, but because subconsciously he thought you would hurt him the same way she did. He was now scared that the same thing would happen all over again. And it bothered you in a way he could never understand. Because after all you had been through together, he still didn’t seem to know you at all.

“Pass me that screwdriver, will ya?”

Your thoughts cut short when he started to speak, absentmindedly nodding your head as you turned towards the toolbox that was placed right next to you. You dug through them for a moment before you spotted the familiar red handle, grabbing it and stretching your arm out to hand it over to him.

He met your hand halfway as he accepted it gratefully, “Thanks.” he muttered with a small smile, the cigarette still dangling from his lips as he spoke.

You nodded before watching him for another moment, tilting your head to the side, “What’re you fixing up anyway?”

He shrugged as his eyes stayed down, “Just some repairs…nothin too fancy.” he spoke, his eyebrows furrowing as he worked.

“Ah.” you muttered with a small nod, going back to your book as you assumed he didn’t want to be bothered while he focused.

Though upon hearing your small mutter, the quietness taking over the space, Daryl subtly looked back up at you for a moment. He knew things had been different, way different than what the two of you were used to, and a part of him felt bad. Mostly because he knew it was his own fault. He had pushed you away when you had done nothing wrong, and he felt guilty for it every single day.

With that in mind, he cleared his throat as he took a puff from his cigarette, “Ya still want me to teach ya?” he asked, his tone growing softer than before.

You glanced up from your book again, seeing the small smile he had on his face as he reminded you of something you had requested a long time ago. You had rode on the back of his motorcycle many times before, but a part of you wanted to learn how to ride all by yourself. And he clearly remembered.

A smile wormed its way onto your face as well as you nodded, “Yeah…yeah I’d like that.”

He nodded in return as he went back to tuning up his bike, “Gotta start ya off slow though. Can’t have ya crashin into some tree the first time ya get on.”

You couldn’t help but laugh to yourself with a roll of your eyes, “Right, we probably wouldn’t want that. But I think I’ll have a pretty good teacher…I’m not too worried.”

His heart swelled, though you couldn’t see, but that comment touched him in a way, “Yeah?” he asked as he looked back up at you.

You nodded again, “I trust you.”

You trusted him. That little comment meant more to him than you could even fathom. It meant that after all the things he had put you through, all the things he regretted, you still loved and trusted him just the same. He couldn’t help but pause for a long moment as he contemplated all of that, how only a few little words could mean the absolute world.

Though when he was lost in his own mind, the cigarette that he now held between his two fingers, slightly burned his skin as some hot ash fell from the tip. He let out a small noise as he shook it off, only now noticing how smokey the space was from how much he was chain smoking with you in the room. He knew you never cared, but a part of him still felt a little bad.

“Sorry.” he muttered as he raised his hand to fan the area a bit, “Didn’t realize how much I hotboxed ya.” he chuckled a little.

You laughed it off as well, waving him off, “You know I don’t mind. Actually I kinda like the smell.”

He raised his eyebrow a bit at the unexpected comment, looking down to the stick in his grasp as he thought about your words for a moment, “Ya never told me that.” he muttered.

You shrugged, “Never really came up I guess. But I don’t know, it’s always kind of been comforting.”

Daryl silently knew what that meant without you even having to explain. And that only made his chest fill with even more warmth than before, knowing he was the reason behind your words. He knew he meant a lot to you, but just hearing you say that his bad habit was somewhat of a comfort to you, it almost made his mindset shift.

You absentmindedly closed your book as you noticed he grew quiet, “You know any cool tricks?” you asked with a smirk.

He huffed quietly with a small smile, wordlessly taking another hit and holding it for a moment before effortlessly blowing it out in small spurts, the smoke forming into little o shapes in the air. You nodded to yourself as you watched him, “Solid.”

He chuckled a little, “Thank you, thank you.” he said as he bowed his head a bit.

Tilting your head a little, you thought to yourself about any more little tidbits he might have experienced, “Have you ever shotgunned it?” 

He raised an eyebrow at you, “Who’s askin?”

“Me.” you smiled sweetly.

He found himself chuckling again, shaking his head as a few memories came to mind, “Uh yeah…yeah I have.” he admitted a bit sheepishly, hoping you wouldn’t ask for any details.

A hum passed through your lips in response, opening your mouth to speak again, though he seemed to beat you to it, “You ever done anything like that?”

You scoffed, “Who’s asking?”

But he didn’t answer you. He only stared at you with the same small smile, however, there seemed to be something a little more behind his eyes. Though you couldn’t tell what that was, it intrigued you slightly. “No…” you answered honestly.

“Ya wanna try?”

It felt like your heart had dropped and settled into your stomach, swearing that you heard him wrong. “You’re not serious.”

But the smile on his face only grew a little, confirming to you just how serious he was as he nodded for you to come closer to him, “Come here.”

In all honesty he didn’t know what he was doing, and seeing the shock on your face only made the small pit in his stomach grow further, though he didn’t show it. He couldn’t really think in that moment at all about how this could be perceived, all he knew was that he wanted to be closer to you. Suddenly having a craving for it, having been without it for far too long.

A few beats of tense silence passed before you finally found the strength to stand to your feet, moving closer towards him as he stood tall as well. You tilted your head back a bit as you looked up at him, standing just a few inches away as you almost waited for him to instruct you on what to do next. Because in all honesty, you didn’t know what you were doing. 

His eyes traced over your face for a moment, almost wanting to ask you to stand a little bit closer to him, but ultimately he refrained. He knew he couldn’t be greedy with you, not when you were already so precious to him. He only held the cigarette out towards you, watching as your delicate hand took it from his grasp, all while never removing your gaze from his.

“Go on and take a long drag.” he instructed, his voice coming off in an anticipating whisper.

You only nodded your head in response, placing the end of it in between your lips as you slowly inhaled all the smoke it had to offer. Daryl couldn’t help but stare down at your lips the entire time, he studied you in the most mesmerizing way it almost caused you to choke on your own spit. Yet you still couldn’t tell what he was thinking, and it made you grow a little frustrated all over again.

Your heart then fluttered when the smoke filled your lungs, taking the cigarette away from your mouth as you leaned up on your tiptoes to get closer to him. His hand instinctively came up to cradle your jaw as he pulled you even closer to his lips, feeling them barely brush against each other before the blissful feeling would soon wash over the two of you.

Exhaling the smoke, you blew the thick cloud right into his mouth, hearing a quiet groan leave him in response. It surprised you how good it felt, how your skin practically ignited with fire at his simple sound of enjoyment, it made your mind wander to a very dangerous place. His hand didn’t stray away from your face as he inhaled the smoke until he physically couldn’t anymore, the craving he felt only building to a new level as a part of him wanted to taste you. Just for a moment.

But the thought vanished, everything crashing down in an instant as he felt you pull away from his mouth, clearing your throat a bit. His eyes fluttered open to see you standing there awkwardly, not knowing what to say as the two of you had never dared to cross this line before in the past.

“Well, I guess now I can cross that one off the bucket list.” you joked with a small, forced laugh.

“Do it again.”

Your eyes snapped back up to meet his as he spoke with zero hesitation in his tone, not even acknowledging that you made a comment at all. “What?” you asked quietly.

He took a small breath before speaking again, repeating the phrase, “Do it again.”

If you weren’t stunned before, you sure as hell were now as you stood almost frozen before him. To say it was one thing, but to repeat it with such confidence was another. He was serious. What started out as just a suggestion, now turned into something a lot more real.

But you found you didn’t protest. Because you wanted it too.

You then held the cigarette back up to your lips, inhaling it all over again as you were surprised you didn’t cough even once in the whole process. His eyes practically lit up as he saw you repeat the action, mentally preparing himself for the familiar feeling that would hit him all over again. But the thing he couldn’t get past was that he had never felt it before now. He only felt it with you. And it was very surreal.

Your perfect lips parted from the cigarette after what felt like a lifetime of waiting, moving back up to him to exhale the smoke into his mouth once more. The man breathed it in as if he needed it to stay alive, his hands coming up to your arms to hold you in place as if he was scared you would pull away again. But you didn’t. You couldn’t. Not even if you wanted to. The slightest brush of your lips made your breath hitch, but before you could even register what you were doing, you pressed your lips firmly to his. It almost didn’t feel real.

Daryl responded immediately, instantly bringing you into him as he wrapped his arms around you to hold you closer to his chest. Your hands went up to the sides of his face, tilting your head a bit so your noses wouldn’t clash so much, the kiss intensifying in just a split second. It was like all the years of the built up tension, the built up feelings, were now finally being unleashed after so long of waiting. You supposed before it was never the right time, but now, it couldn’t have felt more perfect.

His tongue moved to run along your lips almost teasingly, begging for an entrance as his hands gripped you even tighter. And you accepted his request, parting your lips for him and feeling his excitement grow as he didn’t take it for granted. His tongue swirled rapidly in your mouth, letting out a groan of pleasure as he tasted your sweetness. You shivered slightly at the low rumble you heard from him, something about it turning you on even more as you had never heard that sound from him before. It was like a switch flipped.

He continued to absolutely devour your mouth, his hands now running down the curves of your body in a slow and teasing manner, taking his time. You gasped softly as you felt your skin almost tingling under his touch, wanting to feel him everywhere. So without thinking, you quickly moved your hands down to his chest as you frantically began to try and tear his shirt off of him. Your fingers worked on each of the buttons, though you couldn’t see what you were doing, it all felt like it was happening so fast you almost had no time to prepare yourself.

But in a fit of panic, Daryl quickly pulled back from your mouth as the feeling of you trying to take off his shirt finally registered in his mind. He still remained close to you, but his sudden actions stopped you from yours, your hands freezing in place as it was clear you had pushed him too far. But your expression was filled with confusion and concern as you couldn’t understand why he looked almost scared to go any further.

He sighed as his eyes remained closed, almost ashamed to look at your face as he gently leaned forward to rest his forehead against yours. “I…I can’t.” he whispered.

Your eyes seemed to widen as it clicked in your mind. He hadn’t done anything like this since Leah. Since he had been burned so badly by her. Since he was left shattered and heartbroken because of what she did to him. He opened up to her unlike anyone else, and she left him. A lump formed in your throat as the realization set in for you, seeing just how scared he was for this to potentially happen to him all over again.

“I can’t do this, I…I can’t lose you too.”

You sighed softly as you shook your head, your hands tilting his face up a little more, “Hey, look at me.” 

He simply shook his head, his eyes remaining closed, “Daryl, look at me.” you pleaded quietly.

When he did finally open his eyes, you could see he was starting to tear up, breaking your heart even further. Not only to see how much he was hurting, but how much he was truly terrified to lose you. Although in your mind, that wasn’t even a possibility.

“You couldn’t lose me, okay? Ever.” you whispered, “I’m not going anywhere. You know me…I would never hurt you like that. Never.”

Upon hearing your voice reassure him so sweetly, his tears slowly slipped down his cheeks, watching as he swallowed thickly to try and pull himself together. But you didn’t want him to be embarrassed. You understood more than he probably realized. Which is why you were quick to wipe them away with your thumbs, leaning up to kiss the ones you had missed in hopes to offer him even more comfort.

He shuttered under your touch, quickly finding your lips with his own again as he kissed you deeply, holding the back of your head steady as his lips were filled with passion. You responded to his kiss with hesitance, not wanting to push him again as you didn’t have a clear response to how he was feeling. But once you felt him take your hands, guiding them back up to the buttons on his shirt, you had your answer.

In a flurry of hurried kisses and laughs, nearly tripping over one another as you tried to make it back inside the house, the two of you finally landed on the couch in the living room. Neither of you really cared about trying to make it all the way upstairs, almost as if it was a silent agreement that you were both impatient. You panted heavily as each piece of fabric was being discarded onto the floor faster than you could even realize, yet his hands moved across your skin with such ease and gentleness. The action alone told you a thousand things, and yet he didn’t need to say a word.

You quickly lowered yourself to your knees the second you saw the opportunity, getting in between his legs as he sat on the couch. His eyes widened at your actions, “Aye, you don’t gotta-”

But his words were cut off with a groan as you lowered your mouth to the tip of his dick, darting your tongue out to slowly swirl around and tease him the smallest bit. You knew you didn’t have to, but you wanted him to feel special for once, you wanted him to feel important and loved. And besides, you just couldn’t help yourself as your mouth practically watered at the sight. And the small noises he was letting out as you licked sensually along his shaft, was almost like a reward of some kind.

He threw his head back slightly as his hands went up to hold your hair back for you, feeling you teasingly lower your lips just a little at a time to take more of him in your mouth. It was almost like torture with how slow you were going, but it was also the most enjoyable torture he could even endure. His muscles twitched in anticipation and he was already beginning to sweat, clenching his teeth together all the while.

“Come on,” he muttered breathlessly, talking more to himself than he was to you.

But you still took it as a sign, seeing he had enough and finally lowered your mouth even more to take him further. A shaky moan left his parted lips at your actions, hissing slightly when he felt your teeth barely brushing against him as well, though it wasn’t enough to hurt. Just enough to get his attention. You then began slowly bobbing your head up and down the length of him, swirling your tongue and hollowing out your cheeks to really make him squirm. His hands tightened around your hair in response, another low groan echoing around the room as he basked in the state of pleasure you provided.

His breathing grew heavier and heavier by the second, growing even more sensitive to you as your pace began to gradually pick up, trying to take even more of him in your mouth. You couldn’t lie though, he was bigger than what you had experienced in the past, which made you almost nervous. But hearing what you were doing to him so far, it gave you the right motivation you needed to keep going.

“F-Fuck.” he breathed as the tip of his dick hit the back of your throat, feeling your hands running up and down his thighs as you tried not to gag. Though he felt you struggle a bit, pulling your hair up slightly as if signaling you that you could ease up if you needed, but you didn’t. He felt too good in your mouth for you to want to stop.

Your head then moved a bit faster, taking him as deep as you could as you heard his whimpers and moans, not even trying to hold them back anymore. He wanted to make it known how good you were making him feel, just the sound of it was enough to make you wet, and he hadn’t even touched you yet. Your spit soaked him completely, making it almost easier to take him entirely in your mouth as you felt him hit the back of your throat almost every time with each pass.

His breath hitched, “Oh shit,” he muttered as he tried to regulate his breathing, “Ya need to get up here…come on.” he almost pleaded.

And you didn’t need to be told twice, feeling how hard he was now he was nearly throbbing in your mouth, knowing he was close to falling apart. So your lips slowly parted from his aching dick, leaving a few lingering kisses behind before you slowly stood back up to your feet with a smile. Looking at his face now, he gazed at you as if you put all the stars in the sky, as if you painted him the most beautiful sunset you could’ve ever laid your eyes on. Or as if you had given him the best head of his life.

He watched as you wiped your mouth from the spit that nearly dribbled down your chin, quickly reaching forward to pull you in and crash his mouth against yours, licking your lips completely clean. You giggled in response to his eagerness, attempting to remove your thong as it was the last thing in the way, struggling to kick it off your ankles. Though the moment it hit the ground, you instantly moved forward and broke away from his mouth for only a moment, straddling his hips as you hovered on top of him.

The man nearly gawked at the sight of you, “God…” he muttered as if he couldn’t find the words. But you knew what he was getting at, knowing that his actions always spoke louder than his words ever could. And he only proved that further when he lowered his mouth to one of your breasts, sucking gently at your nipple to elicit a small whimper from you.

You could feel his lip curl up in response to your little noises, his hand coming up to gently massage the other with his rough fingers. The scratchiness of his calloused palms made it even better somehow, the sensation sending a shiver down your spine as you lowered yourself a little more onto him in response. He hummed at your actions, encouraging you to continue as his mouth worked wildly along your breast.

One of your hands then moved down to gently guide his tip towards you, running it up and down your slit to gather the wetness that pooled there. Your chest heaved up and down as you were almost overwhelmed with the tingles running through your entire body, nearly causing you to shake. 

Daryl’s mouth then dragged all across your skin, leaving a small trail of small hickies along your chest, groaning as you continued to play with him a little. Your other hand came up to run through his hair, tilting your head back a little as you dragged his dick up to circle around your pulsing clit. That seemed to cause you both to gasp, the slow and tormenting teasing beginning to be too much as Daryl quickly removed his mouth from you, his hands moving to your hips as if to position you in the most perfect way he could.

You followed his lead as your hands moved up to his shoulders to steady yourself, feeling him move his dick down to your entrance to align himself with you. And when you finally sunk down onto him, it felt like absolute heaven. A long, slow moan left your lips as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, hearing a harsh grunt escape him as he tried to refrain from pounding into you. He knew he needed to take his time, wanting to draw this out for as long as he could as if it were the first and last time. He hoped for more, he prayed for more, but he knew it was never guaranteed.

His forehead fell to rest in the middle of your chest as the two of you basked in the pure errotic experience, slowly managing to move your hips once you were ready. It was slow at first, gradually easing into it as you lowered yourself back down onto him again and again, your hands moving to grip the back of his hair. He groaned as he felt you tug a little at his roots, but in all honesty, he didn’t care. In fact, he liked it.

You moaned softly as you rocked your hips against his, pulling almost all the way off of him before he filled you completely once more. What you were feeling was almost indescribable, not having felt it with any other man you had been intimate with in your entire life. But with him, it felt so different, so incredibly good. Like his body was made for yours, fitting together perfectly like a puzzle piece you had been missing for far too long. And you weren’t the only one feeling like that, with him squirming beneath you, it was just a sign to not stop your movements anytime soon.

You bounced on him at a steady pace as you balanced yourself, feeling his hand travel down to rub slow circles along your clit with his thumb. You nearly cried out in response, your heart racing out of your chest, “Oh fuck…yes.” you breathed as his pace quickened.

“Yeah? Ya like that?” he asked as his face moved close to whisper in your ear, feeling his teeth gently bite down on your earlobe.

Your mouth fell open in response as you gasped, nodding your head frantically, “Yes…yes.” you moaned as you continued to rock against him, feeling your wetness drip all over him with how aroused you were.

“Mmm,” he hummed his mouth traveling down to kiss along your jawline, “You’re doin so good sweetheart.” he breathed as he held back a groan, “So good.”

His praise only spurred you on more, your fingers tugging a bit harder at his hair which caused him to groan, thrusting his hips up into you to match your pace. The sinful sounds that escaped you should never be heard by anyone, you couldn’t even believe you were the one making them. But he was the one to cause all those little reactions, adding something more to push you over the edge. And it was working too, you had felt it ever since you were down on your knees in front of him. The familiar tingling in your stomach was building to the point where it could spill over at any moment.

He panted heavily as he began to suck on the base of your neck, “I love you…God, I love you.” he whispered.

The words threw you off guard for a moment as your eyes widened, but you didn’t stop, nor were you scared to say it back. “I love you too.” you responded breathlessly.

That phrase had gone unspoken between the two of you for years, constantly avoiding saying it to each other for no reason at all. Perhaps it was stubbornness, or just the fear of the feelings not being reciprocated. But for whatever reason, this moment alone brought it out to the open. And it couldn’t have felt better.

Daryl thrusted deeper into you upon hearing your response, causing you to gasp as you felt the string finally snap inside you, releasing your orgasm as your muscles twitched. Feeling you squeezing him, he cursed as he quickly pulled himself out of you in one swift motion, cumming all over your stomach. You could’ve sworn your vision went black for a moment as you slowly came down from your blissful high, not a word being said for a few minutes at least as you both tried to regain yourselves. 

His head rested against your chest again, his lips beginning to leave a trail of kisses up your skin as your eyes were still hazy, leading them up to your neck where he nuzzled his face, pulling you close to his chest. You hummed in response, running your fingers through his hair as you thought to yourself for a moment, finally finding the strength to speak.

“Did you…really mean that?” you whispered hesitantly.

He pulled his face back to look at you, his head still too far up in the clouds that he clearly didn’t hear you. The big grin on his face was evidence of that. “Hm?”

You huffed with a small smile, “The whole…I love you thing…did you really mean it? Or was it like the heat of the moment.”

His brows furrowed in concern as he gently cupped the sides of your face, “Of course I meant it. I love you.” he repeated again, as if to make sure you really heard him.

You smiled in slight relief, “Did you mean it?” he asked with a smirk.

“Yes.” you said with a breathy laugh, “I just…wanted to make sure.”

“I don’t say things I don’t mean, darlin,” he said as he leaned in to rub his nose against yours lovingly, “I’ve always loved ya…my dumbass just took too long to admit it.”

You shook your head in response, “It’s okay. I understand why.”

He sighed quietly as he thought about how much he may have missed out on, how much went down the drain just because he was scared. Not only to have his heartbroken, but to potentially lose one of his best friends if you didn’t feel the same way he did. There was always a risk, but he let the fear consume him, and now he was kicking himself for it seeing how easy it was to be with you. He should’ve always known, and now he felt he was too late.

You quickly noticed his change in his expression and gently tilted his chin up so he’d look at you, “Hey…what’s wrong?”

He shook his head, “M’ just…m’ sorry.”

“For what?” you asked in confusion.

“For not actin on this years ago. For pushin ya away when I was hurtin just because I was nervous about it happenin all over again.” he stopped suddenly to gather his thoughts, “I just feel like I wasted so much time.” he finished with a whisper.

Your face was filled with worry about hearing him apologize for something that he had nothing to be sorry for. It hurt you seeing how much this was affecting him, knowing that the two of you should be happy that it finally happened. Not wanting to dwell on the past.

You leaned in to gently kiss his lips for a moment, pulling away enough to speak, “Well, it’s a good thing we got all the time in the world now.” you smiled.

His eyes slowly filled with a little more hope, “You mean…”

“Yeah,” you nodded, “I love you.” 

He let out a small breath he was unaware he was holding, pulling you close to press multiple kisses all over your face, “I love you too.” he whispered, continuing to trace his lips wherever he could reach, igniting an infectious laugh from you.

It seemed his prayers were answered. 

~ Thanks for reading!

[awakenedevildays]

the urge to just hold stiles face and be so sweet to him because he dosent deserve literley any of the treatment he gets from anyone

「sleepless nights」 Stiles Stilinski x F!reader

tw: traumas, implied violence, nightmares, set right after the end of season 3.

━━━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━━━

"Stiles, come to bed." you stir out of your sleep, the empty spot next to you is cold, signaling that he woke up already a while ago, if he ever actually slept. He's sat at his desk, head against his arms on the wooden table, his back is facing you as you get out of the warm sheets to reach him. "Baby," you rub his back delicately as to not scare him and he raises his head to look at you: his eyes are dull and accentuated by two, deep black circles. You give him a tight lipped smile, "you need sleep."

He just shakes his head.

"No." He answers curtly. He refuses to go back to bed, to sleep, to possibly let that thing take control of him again. "I'm fine." He answers and diverts his eyes from you.

"no you're not, you're tired and you need to sleep." You turn his chair around to make Stiles look at you.

He lets you turn the chair easily, his eyes look at you, the bags under them even prominent in the dim light coming from outside the window, "I can handle being tired." He replies stubbornly, but his eyes are telling you that he is already worn out and just when you're about to answer he keeps on going.

"-what I can't handle though, is dreaming over and over about what he- what I did." His voice trembles as he speaks and your heart breaks a little when his eyes become teary. It's the first time he talks about what happened and for the whole past week, after the Nogitsune was defeated, you've tried at least once a day to make him open up: enough to make him understand that you were ready to listen and be there for him but not so much as to make him feel under pressure.

"what he did, Stiles, that wasn't you, it was never you." You kneel in front of him.

"I know-" Stiles answers, his voice becoming thick, "I know that, but- but it was my body, wasn't it? I was there, inside of it, watching." He admits, his head hits the back of his chair repeatedly and his eyes closes shut, like he's trying to get something out of his head.

“I- I can't stop thinking about it." he whispers, opening his glassy eyes to look at you again, you grab his hands, they're cold against your skin and he grips them strongly to hold on something. "Allison is dead, she died because I wasn't strong enough to control him no... because he knew I was weak enough to control and the things my body did to Coach, to Kira and Scott... to you... How can you even look at me after all I did?" he lets out a sarcastic laugh and your own eyes become teary at the mention of Allison.

"No one thinks that what happened is your fault, Allison is not dead because of you, Scott and Kira didn't get hurt because of you and neither did I." You squeeze his hands and bring them closer to you, his bust falls forward until his elbows rest on his knees and his head his slumped in front of your face.

"When the Nogitsune did those things I didn't feel your hands, I didn't see your eyes, I didn't hear your voice." your fingers move to grab his face and caress it softly, he looks at you from between his eyelashes: vulnerable, guilty, and so, so tired.

"How can you say that?" He asks you, and his voice is shaky. "How can you be so sure? Maybe I am evil." he whispers, keeping his eyes close, and you can't help but shake your head as he nuzzles his face in your hands.

"Because everything was so different with him: he was colder, angrier... it was evil, everything that you're not, everything that I'm not seeing right now." your thumbs are placed under his eyes, ready to catch the tears that are threatening to escape.

He leans into your touch, his tired eyes closing and a shaky breath leaving his lips. His shoulders slump forward and his head falls against your shoulder, the wet sensation of his tears against your skin is followed by his breath, like he's trying to fight a sob, trying to control himself. "I don't want you to see me this way," he whispers.

"I don't mind and you shouldn't either, I want to know what's going on in your head all the time, from the dumbest thing to the most serious one, that's what I'm here for." you kiss his temple.

His hands move away from your grip to grab your hips instead, his fingers grip at your skin in an attempt to hold onto himself as he buries his face in your shoulder, trying to hide, embarrassed. He whispers hoarsely, "I don't want to be a burden."

"You're not! You could never be a burden to me, Sti'... You're always there for everyone, always ready to help, let me do this for you, let me be the one to help you this time." You whisper against his temple and it seems to break the last bit of his wall as he finally lets his dam break, his body trembles against you as he finally lets out a broken sob, his chest heaving in a pathetic attempt to keep crying quietly.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he says on repeat, his arms tighten around your hips, clinging to you like his life depends on it.

"shhh, you don't have to be sorry, it's okay," you rub his back to soothe him. His sorry's doesn't stop, his face still pressed against your skin and with each apology his grip on you tightens. "You're exhausted, after a night of sleep you'll feel better, come with me." 

He shakes his head again, "No, no I can't-" He doesn't finish his sentence, another broken sob escaping his throat as he tightens his grip on you even further, you doubt he's even aware of what he's doing, lost in another wave of guilt.

"I promise that I'll wake you up if I'll feel you move or mumble." 

Stiles stays in place, still shaking and sobbing against you, his entire body tense with the effort to keep himself together. "Promise?" his voice is a wreck, a barely understandable whisper.

You nod, "I swear." You stand back on your feet and he lets you maneuver him until he is lying on the bed.

"I don't want to fall asleep," he whispers but it's a weak protest, his eyes are already closing.

"I know... I'll be here." you sit on the pillows next to his head and he soon finds your lap to rest on, his arm lay around your thighs next to his face, a tense sighs escapes his lips when he feels your hands rest on him again: the left on his cheek to dry the tears and the other under the collar of his shirt, right between his shoulder blades.  

His eyes flutter shut and his face relaxes at the soothing feeling of your fingers on his body... the guilt, the tiredness, the fear, he let all of that wash away from his body, focusing on your touch and your voice. He fights to stay awake for as much as he can, until the tiredness in his bones eventually drag him in a deep sleep, his breathing slows.

He looks so vulnerable, so at peace that you can see how tired he was in the way his face relaxes, the shadows under his eyes becoming more prominent against his tired face. He looks young, too young to have gone through all of those ordeals. The room door creaks as it gets opened and your eyes shot up towards the noise.

At the door a sleepy, yet worried looking Noah appears, he's dressed in his sheriff uniform, he probably just got home from his shift and you didn't hear the front door open. He looks surprised to see you here, you haven't slept in the Stilinski's house for a whole month and the past week Stiles forbade you to sleep with him so as not to scare you or make you lose sleep "unnecessarily", his words, not yours. 

You smile to wordlessly greet him and cover Stiles ear with your palm to avoid waking him up. "Don't worry, I'll keep an eye on him for tonight, go to sleep," you assure him with a low voice.

He looks at his son, his chest rising and sinking with each breath, then at you: tired, clearly worried but still determined, he takes in the image for a moment before sighing and nodding, his own tiredness makes him accept the proposal more easily than he would have done if he hadn't been so sleep deprived. "I trust you, just... call me if anything happens."

"I will, goodnight Noah." 

He nods with a forced smile. "Goodnight, sweetheart." He closes the door behind him and you go back gazing at Stiles, your breathing coordinates with his, deep and slow, and involuntarily your eyes close a few minutes later in a light sleep... light enough to feel his breath become erratic an hour or so later. 

You immediately open your eyes and look down at him: his eyes are squeezed shut, eyebrows furrowed in the way you've sadly seen too many times these days and his mouth opened to let out small whimpers between his trembling breaths. You sigh and move your hand to shake his shoulder lightly, until his eyes shot open and he takes a a breath similar to what you would usually take after staying too much time under the water.

It would have been ridiculous to think that after everything that happened to him in the last month he would stop having nightmares after just one night, but it's okay, because you know that he can get through it, and that you won't leave him to deal with this alone.

━━━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━━━

Hope you enjoyed, recommendations, suggestions and requests are always welcome and open! <3

Do not copy or repost.

[rebel-girl-queen-of-my-world]

As a Jewish advocate for Palestinian rights, let me tell you something. I’m fucking hurting right now.

I hate Hamas because they have made the plight of Palestinians so much worse with their actions in that now even fewer people will be willing to acknowledge their 70 years of suffering.

I hate that they will be used as an excuse to demonize all Palestinians, and the US is already upping their already astronomical military funding for Israel.

I hate that they’ve committed unforgivable violence in the name of a cause that is just.

I hate the Israeli government and the IDF for creating the conditions for this tragedy and countless others stretching back to the Nakba.

I hate how they have perverted my culture into a settler-colonial ideology and perpetrated on the Palestinians the very kinds of pogroms my own family fled Europe to escape.

I hate that so many Jews in Israel and throughout the diaspora face ostracism from their communities and families for speaking out against the atrocities Israel has been committing against Palestinians.

I especially hate how many of my fellow Jews have bought into an ideology that can handwave the bulldozing of homes and schools, the imprisonment of children, the bombing of residential homes, the displacement, the massacres. Virtually all things we have suffered as Jews at points in our history.

My heart aches for the innocent people murdered across the board - no matter who the bombs came from. Even though part of me thinks settlers aren’t innocent, what can you really do if you just happened to be born there? And even if you moved to Israel, do you really deserve to die? No.

But neither do all the children in the Gaza Strip currently being bombed in a revenge attack that, with the denial of food, water, and medical aid, violates the Geneva convention.

But to everyone who is posting now about Israel and these “unprecedented tragedies” - yes, these are tragedies, and my heart is so heavy with them. But they are not unprecedented. Where were you when the same things were happening to Palestinians for decades upon decades? There’s a monumental amount of video evidence of atrocities against Palestinians, but somehow people have managed to miss all of that. If you’re only paying attention to the suffering of certain people, ask yourself why.

If you’re only now posting about “of course Palestinians should be free” in posts primarily about mourning the killing of Israelis, where were your voices before now? Those of us trying to organize and fight for Palestinian human rights could have used you.

If more people had spoken out against our government’s support of what Amnesty International and countless other human rights organizations have called an apartheid regime, who knows what could have been possible.

Edit: Since this is getting a little traction, I wanted to leave these links here. Both are very reputable organizations that are providing humanitarian aid:

[thedancingcostumeyoungadult]

It's all timing - S.R.

Spencer Reid x fem!reader smut, no use of y/n

Spencer's return from a case just so happens to coincide with the part of your cycle that has you feeling a certain type of way, which Spencer is only too happy to help with.

Warnings: fluffy smut, oral (fem! receiving), unprotected piv sex, creampie, a smidge of breeding, d/s a little if you squint

~

It's hard to say that Spencer traveling for work was ever convenient, but every once in a while the timing lines up nicely. Like tonight, he's on his way back from a case and you are, to put it crudely, horny as shit. It's not normal horny, either, this is ovulation horny, the kind that leaves you aching all day, overwhelming your already frayed system.

So when you get the text that he's on his way from the airport, you waste no time stripping naked and arranging yourself in the big armchair that faces the door. And then you wait, the clocks ticking taunting you, each second reminding you of his absence.

Finally, the clinking of keys at the door alerts you to your boyfriend's return, the thought of who only rekindling the low burning in your belly. You swallow as the door swings open, adjusting your position slightly to best present yourself to the entryway.

"Baby! I'm h-" Spencer's voice seems to stick in his throat when he sees you, "-ome." He finishes the word slowly, setting his go bag down and closing the door but never moving his gaze from your form. Even in the shadows you watch his eyes rake down your body slowly.

"Welcome home." Your sultry voice draws his eyes back to yours in an instant, the intense gaze softening with a smile shared between you.

"That is quite a welcome." Crossing the room, he kneels slowly in front of you, one of his big, warm hands sliding up the back of your calf as he leans in to catch your lips with his. It's one of those kisses that melts your core, warming your bones and drawing a happy sigh from your chest.

"What did I do to deserve a welcome like this?" He speaks softly as he pulls away, sitting back on his heels as his other hand smooths up the side of your thigh, his touch firm but reverent. You can't help the smile that rises on your face looking down at your love, those soft eyes of his glowing back at you, messy curls falling in his eyes that you gently sweep away. His eyes flutter when you cup his cheek in your palm.

"Being you, mostly." You run the pad of your thumb across his bottom lip, not missing how his breath hitches. "But impeccable timing helps." His head cocks questioningly at you, a line forming where his brows knit together. "You know how I get this time of month." You finish with a devilish little smirk as he finally understands. An eager grin splits his face, his eyes absolutely lighting up.

"Oh!" His hands move immediately, uncrossing your legs and pushing them apart, his grip now anchored in your soft thighs as he surges forward to kiss you excitedly. His excitement and the slight manhandling only add to the quickly forming puddle between your thighs, causing you to whine into his kiss.

As if he read your mind, Spencer broke away from your lips, kissing and biting his way quickly down your body. Excitement clearly outweighed romance tonight, made even more eveident when Spencer, with neither ceremony or hesitation, dove into your pussy like it was the fountain of youth. He'd always eaten pussy like god, but this is even a step beyond that, you didn't even care what he was doing that much, your hormone-flooded brain only barely able to process the sheer pleasure burning through your veins.

"Oh fuck!" You can't help the words falling from your lips as your hands fly to his hair, gripping desperately in a way that must have hurt as your body arches and writhes under him. His hands, large and strong and so warm, run once again up your thighs, gripping your hips almost hard enough to bruise. You can hear him devouring you, wet, lewd sounds interspersed with low grunts of effort that border on animalistic.

It's all so so good, but you still need more, that burning ache in your belly only satiable by one thing.

"Spencer," you manage, your voice cracking on his name "More, please please I need more." He hears you, taking one last harsh suckle at your clit that makes your whole body shudder at the sting before sitting up, his mouth leaving you with a wet pop.

"More? What more do you need, baby?" You just whine, bucking your hips weakly as you throw your head back. Spencer tsks,

"Come on, sweet girl," he plants a kiss on your swollen clit, making you twitch, "you gotta tell me what you want."

"I want your cock," it's like a damn breaks, and suddenly you're begging, clawing at his shoulders with tears pricking your eyes, "I want your cock please, Spencer, please! I wanna be so full of you and your cum and your babies oh god-" you don't get any further before his lips crash against yours, his hands hauling you out of the chair and into his arms. In a matter of seconds you're on your back on the bed, Spencer's lips still hot and demanding against yours, the taste of yourself heady on his tongue as it slides against yours. He breaks from you for only a second or two, definitely ripping something in his haste to rid himself of his clothes.

There were no words, you didn't need them as he pushed into your waiting warmth, his forehead falling to rest against yours as you take him to the hilt, choking on a gasp as he hits that spot thats just so deep and it hurts just a little but it's too good for you to care.

You've always been able to find a rhythm together, fitting against each other just right as he rocks into you, singing your praises in soft grunts and low moans, drawing you ever closer to the edge, begging you to cum for him in every bite, every loving touch, every breath.

You give in to him as he loses himself, the warm ache of his cum spilling into you taking you that last step over the peak and you tumble down the other side. You come apart in the safety of his arms, crumbling and shaking under him as he answers your cries with soft kisses and words of praise mumbled against sweaty skin.

You're glass in his hands as he turns you gently, rolling into his back and bringing your body to lay on top of his. He hasn't pulled out, his cock twitching slightly at the way you squeeze him, still riding the last few shocks of your orgasm.

Your body feels so heavy, so relaxed as you cuddle into his chest, deliciously full and sleepy.

Before sleep takes you, you manage something that sounds like "I love you."

And in that last hazy moment before you drift off, you hear him say it back.

"I love you."

~taglist~

@nomajdetective @reidsbookclub @f-me-reid @spencer-reid-wonderland @dungeons-are-too-cold

[kira-fluff]

no feelings, just lust - wakasa imaushi x fem!reader

what happens when FWB -> feelings? tw: language, casual sex (obviously), trust issues/mental health issues a/n: hello! you all know the drill, i've been busy with all uni. i've been wanting to write again and i finally had some free time tonight. am i once again venting my own psychological issues in the form of writing? yes. but honestly lets be so fr for a second i feel like some of my other girlies relate to this shit. idk, lmk. i hope i'm not the only one. (i'm scared of men)

wakasa didn't "do" relationships. too much work. too much shit he's got on his plate already. and hey, a girl deserves more in a serious relationship then a guy who doesn't give a shit, right? there are plenty of fuckers who treat their girls like trash just because they want the attention but not the commitment. in all honesty, wakasa didn't do friendships either. it's easier in his line of work to keep everyone at a distance. helps it hurt less when they leave - when they die, or shit, they betray you. but through shinichiro, he met you.

turns out, you weren't really all that into relationships either. it was funny that both of your lack of commitment stemmed from trust issues, but that wasn't something you both exactly said out loud. for you, it was easier not to get hurt or rejected if you never gave someone the chance to get close. so, you would play nice, act the part of a friendship, smile, placate, but at the end of the day, no one was really your friend. they were part of an act you played in your head. you assumed various roles, went through your script, amused your audience. and for what? so people can like you? at this point, you weren't even sure. this, of course, didn't even begin to touch on your commitment issues caused by your struggles in your own identity. you don't know what the fuck you want in a relationship, so whenever shit got serious, you cut it off. you decided relationships weren't your thing because guys didn't deserve to have their feelings played with by someone who approaches them half-heartedly.

when you met wakasa, it was perfect. neither of you wanted anything beyond just casual sex. no commitment. you don't care who else the other is fucking, so long as your clean. you can quit whenever you want. no strings attached and with it, no feelings. there were no expectations. you were free to do what you want, and if it wasn't what you wanted anymore, you could call it off without hurting anyone. you just happen to be satisfying each other's needs. it's both selfish, but in a way, also a symbotic give-and-take. if it is mutually beneficial, is it really all that selfish? maybe you shouldn't be giving as much thought to the semantics, but your proclivity for overthinking is part of the reason your real relationships are a clusterfuck.

shinichiro introduced you at the club, where you were languidly sipping on a cocktail. "this is y/n, she's chill. comes out to hang with us sometimes." "yeah, when i got shit else to do," you laughed. your gaze met his purple eyes as you blinked slowly. the smell of weed permeated throughout the club, adding a slight fog to the already densely populated club. "wakasa." he said, and that was it. no "nice to meet you" or any of that other shit. yeah, he wasn't up for the play acting either. good. as he ordered a drink, you took another sip, searching the club for anything amusing to pass the time. blaring music, sweaty bodies, lustful and uninvited hands...yeah, it wasn't really your scene. but you were bored, and honestly a little lonely. with that combination, you hit up shinichiro asking if he and his gang were doing anything this weekend. they always are. how do they not get exhausted just being around all these people? it's a task already just spouting off conversation with these braindead fuckers.

wakasa took a seat next to you, surveying the club just as you were. after taking another sip of his scotch, he said, "this shit gets old pretty fast." you smirked. "can't say i disagree." wakasa licked his lips, taking a long look at your figure. "you doin' anything tonight? 'sides sitting here bored as fuck." you turned your eyes to him once more. "what did you have in mind?"

-

wakasa slammed you against the door to your apartment, kissing you urgently as you attempted slipped off your shoes while just a little bit wasted. you weren't wasted enough to see this guy was fucking hot. and as he rubbed up against you, you realized he had plenty to offer. "so fuckin' hot," he sighed as he kissed you, "i wanna be inside you." you groaned as he licked your lip, then plunged his tongue into your mouth. there, you two melded into a rhythm of twisting tongues, sighing, moaning, drawing back for a breath, and then repeating it all over again. of course, this only lasted so long before wakasa grabbed your ass, lifting you up and carrying you to your bedroom and tossing you onto your bed. as he unbuckled his pants, you make quick work of removing your tight-fitting dress. at last, you basked in each other's well-endowed features. as you looked at him, his purple eyes were nearly pitch black with desire. he wants you. and you can have him. like letting go of a rope, wakasa met your body and slid his cock in between your wet folds. his pace was a steady rhythm as he gazed at you, analyzing what make you feel good. "mmm... harder..." you sighed, to which he quickly responded with more aggressive thrusts, causing the bed to whine as he pounded into you. "yes, oh my god, yes," you sighed. he sucked air through his teeth. "fuck, you're so tight. feels so fuckin' good." as his hips rocked into yours, you couldn't take your eyes off him. your fingers found the nape of his neck, where you pulled at the purple and blond strands, eliciting a groan from him. suddenly he stopped. "fuck, not gonna cum yet. wanna make you feel even better." he pushed your body futher up the bed, then spread your thighs until they touched either side of you. slowly, he leaned his head down toward your pussy, his eyes on you. then, he licked a stripe up, teasingly. you couldn't hold back your whimper. a corner of his mouth turned up as he sucked on your clit, then once again licked up your slick, swirling his tongue around your entrance. you felt your pussy getting wetter as he continued to taste you. "tastes so good. lemme see you cum, baby girl." he moves his fingers inside of you, thrusting them in and out of your pussy at such a rapid pace you began moaning. along with it, he removed his tongue, licking what was left on his mouth, and moved his other fingers to rub against your clit, making slow circles. your breathing became shallow, just gasps of air. your mind went completely blank, only able to focus on the sensations he brought with only his hands. and fuck, those hads were like magic. slowly, slowly, the pleasure built up inside of you until you let out a moan, shaking as you orgasmed. as you sighed, calming your rapid breathing, he eyed you up and down. "you don't think we're done, do you? we're just gettin' started." he said, curling his lips in amusement. you huffed out a laugh, "of course, we wouldn't want you leaving without your dick soaked." his mouth twisted downward, as if he was fighting against a smile. "alright then, make me cum."

-

you awoke to light stubbornly illuminating your room through the blinds. thank god you didn't have a hangover. you sighed in contentment. you felt so full. it had been awhile since you'd had sex that good. well, fuck, it was great. out of this world. mind-blowing. you lost count of how many hours you were at it, how many times you made each other cum. all you could remember was the sensation of wakasa inside of you and your mouth around his cock. and goddamn, the wonders he worked with that tongue. fuck, did you get his number? you glanced over to the other side of your bed. predictably, it was empty. well, at least he wasn't expecting some kind of morning pillow talk. better to just fuck and be done with it then sit there talking about your feelings. lamenting your oversight, you lazily walked toward your kitchen, thankful for your coffee maker preprogrammed to make you the good shit without you fucking around with the machine when your mind wasn't yet awake. after taking a few sips of your highly-caffienated, highly-sugar-filled coffee, you noticed a slip of paper on the counter. thanks for the fun night. if your up for it some time again, text me. xxx-xxx-xxxx - wakasa you smiled. at least one of you had your head on straight this morning.

pulling out your phone, you typed out "hey wakasa. it's y/n. definitely down for another night sometime." not two minutes after you sent your message, you heard your phone ding. "glad to hear. free sunday night. your place or mine?" "your place. wanna see if your place is as glorious as mine, with the shitty white paint over the holes in the wall from my landlord. ya know, the luxurious shit you get when you can just barely pay the bills." you replied. "sounds good. here's my address: xxxx xxxx xxxxxxx." you pouted. not a laugh? well, he's not really the "lol" type, you supposed. but why did you even care? maybe just because he doesn't have a good sense of humor - what a piece of moldy cheese. but the sex was good, so even if his personality is moldy cheese (just because he didn't think you were funny) you can put up with him. and did his personality even matter? you guys were just fucking. it's just sex. nothing more.

-

wakasa breathed out a laugh, looking at your text. the corner of his mouth quirked up despite himself, resulting in an eyebrow raise from his unwanted observer. "the fuck you smiling at?" shinichiro asked, grinning. "damn, get off my dick, shin. none of your business." "it's that girl you fucked last night, isn't it?" he said, moving his eyebrows up in down in the most obnoxious way. "well, yeah, we're gonna meet up and fuck again sometime. nothing serious. you're always so interested in making everything sound like some damn romance." wakasa rolled his eyes. shinichiro frowned, replying incredulously, "well, sor-ry for having a fuckin' dream! not all of us can fuck girls left and right." wakasa scoffed. "not my fault your bitchless." "i'm not 'bitchless', i just prefer a girl to like me for more than my cock." shinichiro defended. "it's really not that serious. if you go into it thinking it's gonna be this whole romantic and idealistic shit, it's not. yeah, they want you for your dick. but you want them for their pussy. it works out." it was shinichiro's turn to roll his eyes. "not everyone can just sleep around like it's no big deal. i want someone who likes me for more than just my amazing, gorgeous, sexy body." wakasa shook his head, "well good luck, because you don't even fit that bill either." shinichiro gasped, "shut the fuck up! i can dream, okay?!" with that, he stormed away. wakasa shook his head. shinichiro was always getting his heart broken. how did he not see that keeping things casual was better than wasting your time trying to win someone over for more than just sex? it wasn't worth the time.

-

for the next few weeks, something idiotic was developing in his mind. after those hours of fucking, wakasa found himself wanting to stay. he thought about coming over earlier so he could try your cooking that you bragged about but probably tasted like dog shit. he wanted to watch the stupid movie you were raving about when you stayed up late talking after a few rounds. he spent sleepless nights thinking about the time when you were drunk and told him that he was so sweet behind all his "bad boy" exterior (whatever she meant by that). more than a few times he awoke to dreams of fucking you senseless. but more concerning were the dreams in which you held his hand, gentely smiling at him as you walked toward a street food vendor. it was like, dating shit. he didn't do dates. so why the fuck was he dreaming about corny shit like some walk-around-town time with you? he briefly considering calling the whole thing off. just biting the bullet and texting you he just wasn't feeling it anymore. but then he'd hear his phone ding again, and it was a text asking if he was doing anything tonight. or fuck, sometimes it was just some "cursed image" (as you called it) that made him question your sanity. but also made him smile. like, what the fuck, wakasa? just block her. don't have anything to do with her. you don't need that investment in your life. it was goddamn embarassing how fast he'd grab his phone when he hard his phone ding - hoping it was from you. so he couldn't let go. the sex is too good, he reasoned with himself. he hasn't had this level of physical chemistry with anyone. so, he can't take the chance of hoping to find someone else.

-

as you sat cuddled against wakasa's side, watching the most iconic movie ever (that you forced him into sitting his ass down and watching), you realized something. you and wakasa were... friends. not fake friends were you had to play the part of whatever the fuck he wanted from you. like, genuine friends. you felt you could be - as lame as it sounds - yourself. after the movie ended, you looked up at him. for some reason, an image of him pushing back your hair to kiss your forehead flashed through your mind. but friends didn't do that shit. and neither did hookups. but eh, everyone gets like that sometimes, right?

-

"'m gonna order some food. what kinda rice do you want?" "just get me whatever you're having. don't feel like thinking right now." he laughed. "lazy ass." you grinned at your position on the couch, watching him as he leaned against the dining table. "says the guy who lives his entire life on 'minimal effort mode'." "it wasn't an insult." "damn. here i was thinking you were being a big meanie, but you're just a real sweetheart, aren't you?" he rolled his eyes. "shut up. 'm ordering a bunch of shit because i know you always want egg rolls." "this is true. i'm big back and proud." he shook his head, withholding a grin, much to your amusement.

it was such a stupid moment. he was just ordering food while chatting with you idly. but fuck. he has feelings for you. and not just "i wanna fuck you" feelings. the kinda mushy, lame shit shinichiro was always yappin' about. the kind of shit that made him think of the future rather than always looking toward the past. he wanted to be more than just a fuck-buddy. in some ways, he felt like you already were. but how the hell is he supposed to ask that? the whole "what are we?" sounds dumb. but exposing his true feelings sounded even more foolish. with that, he decided, it's better not to say anything. it'll go away anyway.

-

news flash, your feelings were not going away. and yeah, you knew at this point that things were changing. you looked at him not with soley physical attraction, but also a deep, emotional connection. you felt like you clicked on a whole different level than any of the other guys you'd attempted to date before. it's not like you could help it. wakasa... there was just something so magnetic about him. something inexplicable that drew you to him. that made it impossible to leave him on read. more than a few times you texted until the sun shone through your windows. and it wasn't sexting. it was talking about stupid shit, or sometimes even getting down to a little bit of some of those issues you've been pushing away because it's easier to ignore them than address them and work through all the mountain of garbage you've carried your entire life. you understood each other the way no one else did. falling in love with him - if you dared use that "L" word - seemed like it was set in stone. once you went beyond sex, it was like love was unavoidable. even when you tried to search for reasons to dislike him - any part of him that made you decide was too much of a red flag to have any sort of loss of feelings - you came up empty. sure, he's not perfect, but fuck if he isn't perfect for you. how could you burden him with your feelings? you already knew talking about it would ruin everything. both of you didn't do relationships. how stupid would it be to suggest one?

-

you both lay panting on either side of your mattress. unexpectedly, wakasa asked, "...are you..." he exerted another breath, "seeing... any other... guys?" your eyes widened in surprise. "...not currently... why?" you hated that a part of you desperately hoped that he was jealous. he glanced away from you. "ah, it's nothin'." you sat up on your elbows. "is it really nothing? waka, are you upset?" he shook his head fervently. "nah, no. it's really nothin'." you raised an eyebrow but conceded. "...well, okay. if you say so." wakasa's eyes found your own. and he stared into your eyes like he never had before. like he was studying them. memorizing every color, every outline, every speckle. his eyes darted from your eyes to your lips, then back again. "can i..." he licked his lips, "can i... kiss you?" you let out a small laugh. "you've never asked before." he looked down. "...nevermind." yet, you understood what he meant. asking.... it was different. it meant something. something deeper than just expressing lust and bodily desire. so, you leaned forward, grabbing the collar of his shirt, and pulled him in for a deep kiss. your mouths moved against each other, yet it was delecate. reverent. like both of you wanted to savor this moment forever, rather than pull apart for something as trivial as air. as you parted at last, after a quick breath, wakasa leaned in for a gentle kiss on your mouth. as he parted, his eyes found yours. and you could no longer deny that your hopes were not unfounded. "i love you, waka." he blinked slowly. "i love you, too."

a/n: rahhhh i think this might be one of my favorites. please share your thoughts!