#that’s probably a good thing? it’s not a huge deal just super disappointing coming from this person in particular.

[joshuadunshua]

He’s got like this weird fixation on his acceptance as a man in gay cruising spaces, as though “being perceived as fuckable” is an example of systemic & systematic trans masc privilege? And he won’t look past his own experiences as a trans guy in these spaces to listen to other trans mascs. “I was considered fuckable by gay men even before I passed” congratulations???? Literally what the fuck is with the fixation on being fuckable?

[a-jaded-mirage]

Blue Beetle and El Paso

I would be lying if I said that I was not disappointed by the canonical home of Jaime Reyes being changed both in the movie and in recent comics. However, I would also be lying if I said that I absolutely detested the movie for whatever reason. I enjoyed the movie for what it was and what it meant to the Hispanic and Latinx communities. It is a huge deal, and I think it was done well. Going back to my original point, it is hard to be disappointed when it feels as though I am not missing out on much when Blue Beetle's relationship with El Paso was never done true justice anyway.

The West Texan Mexican-American experience is hard to fully encapsulate into one solid thought or idea. I can confidently say that the approach DC had in most iterations of the comics, cartoons, recent movie, and other forms of media always toned the experience down and made it a duller aspect of his story. I can not recall even a single time when El Paso was brought up or portrayed in a way that was recognizable to an El Pasoan across any of the aforementioned media. It always felt disconnected and out of touch, but I still held it close to my heart because it was something alluding to home.

In a way, I am happy that Blue Beetle is now from the fictional (emphasis on that) Palmera City, because it reiterates that heroes can only be super in Hollywood when they are superficially placed in a cookie-cutter big and flashy city. All I really have to say to that is, good for them. They did what they needed to in order to reach a wider audience. I am sure that the payoff for the corporate powerhouses at the end was worth it even at the cost of individuality. Come to think of it, my mind cannot really conjure up any mainstream superheroes that operate in any desert long term. Any time spent in the less "glamorous" parts of the Southwest is almost always smaller plot-driving settings that act as a stepping stone for bigger heroes and not as a home.

Anyway, all of this is to say that I understand why they did what they did with the setting. I even still happen to think the entire production team did a great job, but that does not stop me from wondering what could have been at any point in Blue Beetle's recent history if someone had used the beauty, culture, and complexity found uniquely in Sun City far more productively. There was so much more potential than the oftentimes vague and noncommittal nods given to the setting. It just was not utilized to its fullest potential, and if that would have been a continuous theme, then I am glad that they are no longer working with it.

Shifting to something less ranty, I absolutely suck at drawing. I am a STEM person through and through, but that did not stop me from visualizing all of the things I would have loved to have seen portrayed in a Blue Beetle story while experiencing being a teenager in El Paso. He was my absolute favorite superhero because he was one that I saw every single day in my hometown, and there were several things I felt he would have enjoyed doing.

For example, we have a ton of high schools. If I had to narrow down the ones I think Jaime Reyes would have attended, I would probably say my top three picks would be: El Paso High School, Bowie High School, or Austin High School. An interesting custom that schools in El Paso have is placing the first initial of a myriad of our high schools on the mountains. They are huge and visible, as well as a testament to our school spirit and pride. The Top 10 percent of most of our graduating classes wear different colored gowns at graduation than the rest of their peers, which is something I was told was not a common occurrence in most other states.

Homecoming is a huge deal, and people will buy, make, or sell Mums and corsages. It is kind of difficult to explain to people from around the states who may not be entirely familiar with what it is, but it is an old Texan tradition that is typically shared between sweethearts (dates) on the last day of Homecoming spirit week. It is something that a lot of people go all out for, and plenty of pictures exist on the internet of the various ways that they can be customized. I always thought it would be cool to see what Jaime Reyes would do for his Mum.

Prom is pretty much Prom wherever you are in the States for the most part, and ours are held at some great venues in the city, so there is not much more to say about that part of the high school experience. As far as colleges go, some of the most popular for teenagers at El Paso high schools to apply to are UTEP, EPCC, TTU, Texas A&M, and any of the other UTs (UT Austin, UT Dallas, and UT San Antonio to name a few). There are even several private universities like Rice, Baylor, and Trinity to name a few more. Hell, a lot of us even go to schools like NMSU in what is essentially our sister city of Las Cruces, there is also UNM, ASU, U of A, and CU. There are so many different choices for universities that are realistic and in the general area that Jaime absolutely could have chosen to apply to and attend. I think that seeing him initially as a Junior or Senior in an El Paso high school, and subsequently watching his transition into a college student in the city or elsewhere while grappling with his powers and responsibilities as Blue Beetle would have been so fascinating.

As far as places that it would have been nice to see him interact with at some point, it would be easier to just give a general list of my favorites. I wish that the following places could have been incorporated into the Blue Beetle story at some point long past: Chico's Tacos, Franklin Mountains State Park, Transmountain Road, Downtown, The Plaza Theater, Cielo Vista, The Fountains at Farah, Sunland Park, the Outlet Shoppes, Rosa's Cantina, Southwest University Park, Don Haskins Center, Concordia Cemetery, Scenic Drive-Overlook, the El Paso Star, Hueco Tanks, San Jacinto Plaza, St. Patrick Cathedral, any farmer's market or swap meet, any of our museums (Art, History, Archeology, Border Patrol, Science, Chamizal), the Coliseum, Ardovino's, Orange Cow, Burrito House, Bowie Bakery, Lucy's Cafe, any of our dulcerias, as well as literally any of our regional and national recreational chains. Obviously, there is so much more, but all of what I listed could have definitely been used for something whether it be a fight with a villain of the week, or opportunities to flesh out Jaime's character more socially and individually. That, and it tickles my funny bone to imagine the Teen Titans trying something like Chico's Tacos for the first time.

Unrelated, Jaime would totally listen to Khalid.

Naturally, there are so many other locations in surrounding cities and states that easily could have been used as well for any plot points that would have added even more Southwestern charm. I mean, part of New Mexico's tourism schtick is literally aliens (Roswell), and the scarab is in fact an alien now. However, for the purposes of this, I focused on El Paso. That is really all I have to say about all of this, if you stayed for my entire rant I appreciate it. If not, I totally understand, and I really just wanted to put my thoughts out into the world and write this love letter to my home city.

I love that Blue Beetle is now further into the general public's eye, and that his character means something for the entire extended community. He now has room to change, grow, and evolve from what he was before in a way that is far more defined by the expectations for a mainstream hero. Even if the El Pasoan Jaime Reyes can only exist truly in my mind, it is an okay price to pay for a narrative that touches my heart specifically. I am most certainly not a writer, so I hope that the next time we have a hero from El Paso, some of my city's charm can truly be done justice. After all, the only person who can characterize an El Pasoan correctly is an El Pasoan.

[siren-nate]

Metroid Dread review

I've now played through Dread twice, on both Normal and Hard difficulty. I'm probably gonna take a crack at Dread difficulty just for fun but I doubt I'll get far, the furthest I'll probably make it is Escue. So, I think I can pretty confidently gather my thoughts on it and review it unbiased.

From a gameplay standpoint... yeah, this is the best 2D Metroid. No surprises there. It's the most recent, so it has the most quality of life improvements. I think it's a bit unfair to say that too loudly because all prior 2D Metroids offer experiences that Dread doesn't, and the only game anywhere near to it in modernity is Samus Returns.

What I find interesting is that a lot of clever additions are very similar to ideas that the Prime series had, the chief among them being Storm Missile. It's a thing with Metroid games that by the time you have over a hundred missiles, every new pack you pick up feels like just a drop in the bucket, especially in Fusion where super missiles are a straight upgrade to all missiles rather than a separate weapon. Prime fixed this issue with the addition of Charge Combos. What are you gonna use all these hundreds of missiles on? Expensive specialty weapons that deal a LOT of damage in exchange for guzzling down your missiles much faster than normal use, that's what.

Dread has basically the exact same concept in the Storm Missile. It's the boss-melter of the game, you will use it on every single tough enemy or boss fight after you get it, especially since it pierces electrical shields when most of your arsenal doesn't. The trade-off is that one full use of it costs fifteen missiles and the actual damage-per-missile is much lower than Super or Ice missiles, so it's trading efficiency for raw DPS. It's a very good addition to the formula that kind of reimagines the whole Missile/Super Missile dichotomy in the earlier games.

Aside from that, though, most of the new additions are a bit underwhelming. A lot of them are just new midgrades between the start and established upgrades - the Spin Boost is a one-time Space Jump, the Diffusion Beam has been reimagined as a weaker Wave Beam, etc. I don't hate these, since they do mean that Dread has the longest and most involved journey towards getting stronger, and you really start to feel it. It's especially noticeable when you finish the game once and start again.

But in terms of actual fully new stuff, the only things that really come to mind are the Storm Missile, the Flash Shift, and the Cross Bomb, and... nobody gives a shit about the Cross Bomb. You use it to get like three items in the entire game and you get it about a stone's throw from the final boss, which is bizarre when it's really not that special or combat-useful (Unless you're a cracked-out speedrunner since rapidly laying them can do more damage than beam spam against the final boss).

On top of that, even Metroid staples from prior games in the series are hit or miss. Ice Missiles have been relegated to basically just doing slightly more damage than Super Missiles and opening up some enemies for an easy one-hit-kill follow-up by parrying them to shatter them. You never use it to ascend frozen enemies; the closest thing to it is when you freeze temporary platforms so they last longer under your feet, which is basically only used in a single room in the game. It's not a huge deal, but it just feels like such a disservice; the Ice Beam in the very first Metroid was one of the most novel and interesting ideas it had by letting you turn obstacles into something useful for vertical traversal. It's been a mainstay in every single 2D game even after being swapped over to missiles rather than a beam weapon, and here it's just flat-out not a factor in the game that ends the overarching Metroid and X-parasites plot started all the way back in the first game.

One thing I am not disappointed in however is the Speed Booster and Shinespark. I don't think I can overstate how much I love them in this game; you can slide, you can walljump to instantly go the other direction while keeping your speed, you can walljump multiple times consecutively to ascend without needing to store your Shinespark and then Space Jump upwards- combine it with Flash Shift, which is a fantastic addition to your movement kit, and Metroid Dread has breathtaking levels of schmovement that make me feel like a fucking ninja.

Going back to what I talked about before, the unique experience that this game offers is the EMMIs, and... yeah, they really are the identity of this game. They're pretty well-utilized, but I have multiple big gripes with them. For starters, the number of them feels... fake. There's seven of them, right? Except, actually, there's six, because the last one gets killed in a cutscene. Of those six EMMIs, three of them are basically tutorials; the first one can't climb, the second one can't go through small spaces, so it takes until the third one before you finally get to a fully-functioning baseline one. But it's alright, because that still means there's three EMMIs with unique abilities... two of whom inexplicably shut off their unique abilities for the final confrontations with them.

On top of that, I absolutely HATE the parry system for EMMIs. For those who don't know, their parry timing is 1) completely randomized, 2) frame-perfect, and 3) impossible to see coming. What I mean by that last one is, you cannot see the tell and then parry, even if you're a supercomputer; you have to anticipate it. Any one of these things would be difficult to deal with. Any two of these things would be extremely difficult - but I still wouldn't mind it because EMMIs are supposed to be the most dangerous thing in the game and parrying is an absolute last resort. But all three means it is literally just pure fucking luck whether you manage to parry an EMMI. You can't anticipate it because it's random, you can't react fast enough to parry after you see the flash, and the ungodly levels of precision required means there's absolutely no wiggle room. It's a complete roll of the dice. I'm not mad that it's too difficult, I'm mad because why even give me the option at all if it's an utter RNG check? Why not just have the EMMI kill me when it catches me and send me back?

But my biggest issue with the EMMIs is that the level design of their zones isn't always great. Dread has a big issue with linearity at times where what seems like multiple paths is really just a long hallway with a lot of locked doors that you're going to open in a very specific order, and it's at it most grating with the EMMI zones. Running from them is at its best when you have multiple routes to take, scrambling and doubling back while the killer robot is steadily chasing you down trying to flank you and find your position. That's exhilarating and fun. But there are a few occasions where the game basically locks you in a hallway with the EMMI between you and the exit, and trying to figure out how the fuck to get around it without touching it so you can progress becomes a lot more frustrating than exhilarating because there's literally no room for error.

This is compounded by how the Phantom Cloak is an utterly worthless upgrade in every way that should never have been added to the game. You never know where an EMMI is unless it's near enough to you to be a major threat, so you have no idea when you should use this thing to avoid detection - if it's close enough that you know for certain, it's already detected you and the cloak isn't useful anymore.

Like, which would you rather do: sprint and Flash Shift and Grapple Beam through the zone as quickly as possible, doing your best to stay out of its line of sight so the doors don't lock, OR use the thing that grinds your movement speed to a halt in exchange for five free seconds of not being detected, and then either turns off or starts draining your health so you can get instakilled by the first enemy you run into after escaping the zone? The Phantom Cloak only becomes more superfluous when you reach the final EMMI, which can detect you no matter where you are on the map - there's absolutely no point in putting the cloak up to build some distance, because no amount of distance will keep it from getting on your tail again.

I think what would have made the EMMIs better is if there were no locked doors or upgrade-checks in their zones. It's just you, a maze, and a killer robot somewhere inside, and you have to go through there if you want to make progress by reaching other areas that the zone connects to. To add to that, don't even tell me when it's hearing me, or nearby on the minimap. I want to have no idea if it's following me or not other than the sound of its movements getting steadily louder. I want that absolutely terrifying uncertainty.

That's about all I have to say on the gameplay front. When reviewing something, I like to try to condense my critique into one highest praise and one lowest criticism. The highest praise for Dread would basically just be "This is the most modern 2D Metroid game, of course it's going to be the most fun to play because it has the least irritations", even if I think the EMMIs needed more work. My lowest criticism would be... God, like, most things about the story?

Nintendo doesn't tend to tell complex stories with their big franchises. Metroid is the big exception. Yes, even if the 2D games never get as complex as the Prime games because the Prime games have the luxury of scanning lore, the last four games have set up as many interesting pieces as they've closed the book on, and Fusion ESPECIALLY left some intrigue with there being corruption in the Federation and the existential threat of the X-parasites. Dread... never talks about the corruption in the Federation. It's literally not even addressed. I don't give a shit if this was a mistranslation of the original Japanese in Fusion saying that it was a specific "splinter", that's just throwing away free intrigue in your plot and it's a massive waste.

Raven Beak is the weakest Metroid villain, full-stop. His entire motivation is "I am a warlord who wants to clone Metroids to conquer the universe", which means he's effectively just Mother Brain with a new coat of paint slapped on top and without even the interesting jealous characterization she gets in the Zero Mission manga. Yes, he slaughtered his own kind, and even fed traitors of his own clan to a monster in a ritualistic execution, but making a villain ruthless does not automatically make them interesting. It doesn't even automatically make them intimidating; Raven Beak spends the entire story talking himself up and sucking his own dick, then gets merc'd in the same game he debuts in after beating Samus twice exclusively by teleporting to grab her in cutscenes.

Introducing the Mawkin as a distinct faction from the Thoha was a mistake because it completely robs the idea of an evil Chozo of any weight. Oh, yeah, these are the bad Chozo who just care about war and conquering and physical prowess. All of those other Chozo are still saints who just made a mistake when they created the Metroids, don't worry.

Everything about Raven Beak is missed potential. An evil Chozo who takes Samus's ideology of "peace will come to the galaxy only when evil is vanquished" to the extreme? Who wants to see the legacy of the Chozo's projects like Metroids preserved, rather than eradicated and forgotten? Who creates the monster that is his undoing by allowing Samus to live and grow her Metroid powers, exactly as Ridley not finishing the job on K2-L eventually resulted in Samus killing him? There are so many interesting things you could do with Raven Beak, and Metroid Dread does none of them. He's just The Remorseless Guy Who Wants To Conquer. It's a crying fucking shame.

Even aside from him, the game introduces a friendly Chozo - a living, breathing member of the people who raised Samus and molded her into the hero she is and have been the linchpin of the entire greater universe of the franchise - so that he can dump exposition for one cutscene and then immediately be killed off. I timed it: Quiet Robe got to be a part of the Metroid canon for four minutes and forty-five seconds before he was killed. It's hilarious how clumsy and forced it is.

And this isn't even getting into the bottomless well of plot holes and unanswered questions in the game's story that piss me off more the more I think of them.

How did Kraid get to ZDR? If you're going to give us fanservice this loud and blatant, fucking explain how it happened. Are you telling me that - for SOME reason - the Mawkin showed up on Zebes during Samus's final mission there, captured Kraid, left without taking any of the Metroids just laying around, and then locked him up in their basement? Why???

Why do the X-infected Chozo soldiers still seem to be following Raven Beak's command? This one's not concretely spelled out, but the final, gold one seems to be specifically acting to guard Raven Beak. Either that or it's just a coincidence that the strongest one is right before the final boss fight with him.

Why doesn't Samus just continue shooting Raven Beak when he lifts her up by the neck? I get that the Metroid powers are talked up as the deadliest and most dangerous ability Samus has ever wielded, and maybe she didn't want to risk using them unless she could get him by the head, so grabbing his arm was out of the question. But if he's out of her reach, she still has a perfectly good arm cannon that she used for both confrontations she had with him. I'm already suspending my disbelief for the sake of him being able to choke her to death through a suit of powered armor, game - can you just have him grab her arm cannon with the same hand to pin it to her side, or something?

Why didn't the X leave ZDR when they had the chance? The entire impetus of the ending of Fusion is Samus realizing that "X-parasite with the knowledge of a pilot" + "Working starship to escape" = the end of galactic civilization as the X spread from planet to planet faster than she can contain them. Quiet Robe outright states that every single Mawkin Chozo was infected - even if they were ALL contained to Elun, are you telling me NONE of them were pilots despite traveling to and from SR388? Is Raven Beak the only pilot in the entire Mawkin civilization? We see ships in the background of Hanubia, like, at least four or five of them. Why didn't the X leave when they had the chance if their only instinct is to spread and grow their numbers?

Follow-up: Where did those ships go during the escape sequence? Were they all destroyed when shit started blowing up? If not, and the X fled the exploding planet when they had the chance, how the hell is the next game going to happen with only one Samus and 4-5 ships full of X beginning their spread to different planets? Exactly how dangerous do you want me to think the X are, Metroid? Is them getting loose a doomsday scenario for the entire galaxy or not? Make up your fucking mind!

In summary - the plot of this game is a bottomless well of missed potential. My friend Lilith has told me all about better ideas where instead of Samus gaining her power-ups from EMMIs, she fights other non-infected Mawkin who are still loyal to Raven Beak and using their own Chozo power suits, which would have been incredibly fucking sick. Samus being forced to grapple with the fact that evil really is everywhere in the galaxy, even in the Chozo who played a part in raising her? Fighting this shadow of herself, this monster she could become if she goes off the deep end in her desire to bring peace to the galaxy by fighting the battles civilians shouldn't have to?

But even putting aside how these base elements could have been used better, what we did get is riddled with plot holes and an incredibly inconsistent overall threat level regarding the X-parasites. There are good elements to the story, don't get me wrong, but it's 90% flash and 10% substance. Yes, it's cool that Samus gets Metroid powers when everyone and their grandmother wanted that to happen since the end of Fusion, and the sheer cinematic scale of the Metroid Suit is unbelievably kickass - but it has no weight without a villain that I can get invested in stopping. And I don't accept "No Metroid villain has been that deep" as an excuse, because A) like I said, Mother Brain and Ridley got some pretty interesting characterization in the manga, and B) that doesn't mean things can't improve. Dread improved a lot, but it didn't improve the story.

[shrimp-buffet]

!!BRAWL TALK SPOILERS!!

Man I have not done one of these in a while- mostly due to a combination of other fixations taking more priority in my brain, and the increasing complexity of all the topics in the most recent Brawl Talks making it harder to do these opinion summaries. Plus, they take me a long time to make. I do really enjoy sharing my personal thoughts though, so I’ve decided that I’ll only really cover things that I really want to talk about so it’s not so much to handle doing one for each talk!

With that out of the way, here’s my thoughts of some of the stuff in the most recent Brawl Talk!

Starting with new brawlers!

Mico honestly kinda terrifies me from a gameplay perspective. While I think his slow reload is a fair enough debuff for his attack, his air immunity and damage is gonna be pretty annoying to deal with, ESPECIALLY since he’s gonna be free to everyone meaning he will haunt my every nightmare in every game.

Beyond that I think he’s cool enough. His super is awesome and I’m hoping to see some funny stuff of him hanging with Lola and Gray!

LOOK AT MY ADORABLE ITTY BITTY KITTY SON-

Kit whole move set is so damn interesting and seems like he’s gonna be so much fun! As a fan of supports myself, I might even sort of side-main him if I enjoy using him enough. (Though that would probably end up pushing out my dear best boy Otis from his spot, since I’ve already made him second to Sandy)

Love everything about this dude, gimmie my son as soon as possible-

These guys are so stupid adorable I NEED to see them being protective over R-T and bickering like siblings in the most loving way- Please guys I need so much cute fan art of them

I always wondered what it would be like for two brawlers to be played as one and I’m not disappointed with the result! Something feels a bit empty, but it will probably be easily fixed with good gadgets and star powers.

Just breezing through the hypercharges

OH NO-

OH NOOO- (seriously this one actually seems op)

Oh hey! Nice! (Big ol’ stinky Fang fan right here lol)

I never really have any huge thoughts on the hypercharges, but found these one both funny and scary as hell.

And that’s really it when it comes to the things I wanna talk about. Thank you if you read all of this and feel free to share you’re own thoughts :]

[semperama]

hi erin i was wondering if you had any advice for how to deal with not getting any comments on a fic. i'm in a pretty small fandom and i get the same (small) amount of kudos as many other writers there. but i recently posted a pretty personal fic that i worked extremely hard on for months, so hopeful that it might resonate with people, and now i just feel crushed. i'm working on new fics but I keep thinking that I’m probably only setting myself up for more disappointment ;(( any thoughts? ty <3

Hi, anon! I'm sorry to hear you feel like your hard work has gone unnoticed. That's such an awful feeling. I can't say I'm an expert, because I haven't been in a fandom small enough that it was normal to get no comments, but I do know what it's like to work hard on something and be disappointed by the response. I have a few things that might help.

If you can, I really recommend trying to make friends in your fandom. Especially in small fandoms, it can be such a lifesaver in terms of getting feedback and keeping your motivation. A good keysmash in the comments of a Google Doc can be just as satisfying as a dozen comments on AO3. Finding someone you trust to beta read your fic, or to bounce ideas off of, is a good idea in ANY fandom, but it can be especially helpful in small fandoms to keep from feeling like you're shouting into the void. And make sure you're giving back to others as well! Leave some comments on other people's fic! Follow them on tumblr and hype up their projects! Do whatever you can to tap into the community that is there.

I hate to say it, but part of it really is adjusting your expectations. If everyone in the fandom gets a handful of kudos at most, then you need to go into writing for that fandom with your eyes wide open, knowing that even if you pour your blood, sweat, and tears into something, all you can expect is that same handful of kudos. That says nothing about you as a writer. You could write an absolute masterpiece, and if there are only 10 people interested in that subject, you're only going to get 10 people to read it. And that's okay! That doesn't mean you've failed in any way, and you should still be proud of your accomplishments. But you can't get blood from a stone, you know? If the audience isn't there, it isn't there. In a way, that can be freeing though. The problem with large audiences can be the expectation of a huge response every time and feeling like you failed if you don't get it. In very small fandoms, at least you know the lack of response is due to the lack of people, not something you did wrong!

Related to the previous point, if you're going to be writing for a fandom where getting lots of (or any) comments isn't the norm, then you should try to find a way to measure success for yourself that doesn't have to do with comments. That often just means writing something you are proud of and you enjoy reading. Especially in the case where you're writing about subjects that are personal to you, make sure you take the time to appreciate the catharsis it brings you. Pat yourself on the back for how you're improving your writing skills by getting in touch with your own emotions and experiences and turning them into stories. Those things aren't useless if they don't reach a huge audience. You are improving yourself by doing it!

All that being said, if it really is a super duper tiny fandom and there's no community to get involved with and you don't think you'll ever be happy writing for mostly yourself, I do honestly think there's a time when you have to ask yourself if you need to move on. I personally suck at writing for myself. If no one's going to read it, I don't want to write it, haha. In the past when fandoms have died or my friends have left, I've jumped ship too, because I need the community aspect. Fandom isn't fun for me without it. Everyone's different though! I've known people who are happier writing for fandoms so rare no one else is writing for them. It just comes down to both your tolerance for the lack of feedback and how much you feel compelled by this particular fandom.

Anyway, sorry I got so long-winded and I'm sorry if none of that is helpful! I hope you can glean something from it at least, and I hope you are able to feel proud of yourself for finishing a personal fic, which is SO hard to do, even if it didn't get the response you were hoping for. <33

[pbandjesse]

Today has been super busy but also really good. This was the day I was most worried about but for real it was mostly great and there weren't many troubles. Traffic and getting lost were the only issues. Surprise surprise.

I was able to sleep a little easier last night. I am still struggling with staying asleep. But it was okay. I was not thrilled to wake up. But when I did James was there and that made me happy.

I noticed last night that I have a red mark on the tip of my nose. Which hurts if I touch it. I don't know what it is. And I'm half convinced I have skin cancer. But it could also just be nothing. Or I'm dying. These are the only options. I'll have the doctor look at it at my rhumatologist appointment on Monday. But hopefully it just clears up before then.

Hoenslty it's probably allergies. All day my face and ears have been itchy. My scalp has been sore. I don't know what's up but it's obnoxious.

But regardless of my small discomfort, today was a beautiful day.

I got washed up and dressed and got myself together and ready. James brought my art materials to the car for AWAH (art with a heart from here on out) and they made me a bagel.

We went to work. And listened to their silly podcast which I mostly really like. But there keeps being lines about someone being disappointed and it makes my stomach hurt. It's mostly very funny.

When we got to the museum I mostly wanted to sit and be quiet for a bit. I would go and sit in the back. But then Rosia was there. She had come early to set up balls and track because it was her first one she was leading. And she has an engineering background and really went all out writing out stuff on the board. Which is great for the 7th graders we had today but may be over the heads of 2nd graders.

Even the school came they were super nice kids. And we had half the numbers we had on our schedule. Which was just fine.

I would let Rosia do her thing and just sit and watch. I had some feedback but also she did great. Her intro was a little long and I think she could push the material ideas more. That's why I like writing as I go because it gets them to really think bout the answers. But overall I think it went really well.

Out tubes were very chewed up though and so I would mostly hang back and trim the tubes down to get the gnarly parts off.

I would build some examples. And showed the kids ways to solve the problems. And they all seemed to have a lot of fun.

We had our tour next. I got upset with Jordan for being late again. He was like it's only 2 minutes but you should be starting your tour at 1130. And if you aren't getting them until 1132, you aren't getting to your first gallery until 1135 or later. And then you've lost 5 or more minutes. And it sucks!! Like yes it's not a huge deal in the grand scheme but it's still an issue when it effects the next group.

But we got on our tour and that was good. I did a little intro and passed it over to Rosia and she did great! The timing was a problem but mostly she was doing great.

I didn't realize she hadnt seen my tour before. And when we swapped over to me she said I did great and she learned a lot and could see my passion and that was so great. I'm glad I was able to share that with her!! She's super sharp and is going to do great.

We did a debrief after and I gave her some feedback. She shared with me about her ideas about moving away from the skilled/unskilled language and also she says she's not going to use African American. She is a black woman and I was like tell me why!! And she said she, and many others, prefer black because they aren't all from Africa! And I was like you are so right. I will work to change my language. I am still going to use the skilled/unskilled but with explanations because that's what's being used in the real world and I want them to understand what that means when they hear it on the news. Because it is used in the real world still. But I am excited to have so many new people to learn different perspectives and different languages expectations.

We actually had another new person start today. And she seems lovely. It's exciting to have more people around. Even as others are leaving for greener pastures.

I would go and eat lunch. And then I would take Jim and Rosia up to the maintenance office to show them the lights on boxes so we could build those. And I would build a whole bunch of flashlights. Which I always love doing. And I would chat with Phil and Stanley about going to work at Puhtok full time and what they think I should ask for and that made me feel good. Like I'm asking for something reasonable. And gives me strength for tomorrow when I talk to Heather about it.

I had a lot of time until I had to be at awah. And so I chilled in the parking lot for a while. And read through the lesson. Watched tiktoks. And eventually would start heading over to the center.

I got stuck in some traffic. But would quickly make my way there. And I waited in the parking lot for a bit. But would soon head inside.

And I had the best time. They were all so nice. Only half of the expected participants came but that was okay. And my assistant is nice but made me a little nervous. Moving things a lot when I wasn't ready. We also got started a little late so we didn't have a ton of time.

But they were all so lovely. They painted and drew. I helped those who had numb hands. And the woman who was our contact gave me a snack and asked if we could make this longer next time. I told her to contact awah and that I was into it if that was okay with Jake.

We cleaned up and I took all their pieces so we can finish them next month. So I will keep them safe at home. And then I was off.

It was not an ideal drive. I got confused and thought I was driving down a one way be sure the sun was in my eye. But I would make it to the awah building right on time.

I got all the supplies inside and very quickly they were giving us sandwiches for dinner. And I learned a lot through this training. About differentiation in teaching and intelligence styles and it's neat. I also have been enjoying meeting people. Though I feel like I have been answering to many things because I am nervous and want people to like me. But it was fun doing different breakdowns about lessons and changing lessons to work better for different learners.

I had a lot of fun at the training. And was happy to go home.

The drive back was quick. I struggled to bring the box of my participants' art. Dropped my totebag. But I got everything inside and James helped me find a place to put everything. And I went to take a shower.

My skin and hair are still really bothering me but at least Im clean. I sat on the couch with James and we talked. A little debrief about the day. And I went to paint my toes before we got in bed.

Which is where we are now. I am really tired. I want to read for a little and try to go to sleep early. Let's see if that actually happens.

Tomorrow I have museum and then off to puhtok to set up for Friday and maybe figure out working there more!! Wish me luck!! Goodnight!!

[astaroth1357]

How about the brothers + diavolo reacting to an mc that smokes cigarettes, but only when stressed out? I hope this ask doesn't make you feel uncomfortable. 🙂

So this is interesting for me because I'm actually an asthmatic and cigarette smoke is one of my triggers. Naturally, that means I'm not the biggest fan of smoking (because I like breathing air) but I'm going to try not to turn this into a straight PSA. I assume if you smoke, you already know what's up and if you don’t, you're probably not considering it and leave things at that. I imagine what you want is the characters' perspectives and not mine, so I'll do my best to give that to you here. I hope you like it!

An MC Who's a Stress Smoker

Lucifer

Not the biggest fan of their habit, but mostly due to smell. Actually needing that bit of stress relief - he totally gets.

After he found out that they smoke he set a lot of ground rules: "No smoking in the House; No smoking at RAD; No smoking in uniform" yadi-yadi-yada… but he never straight up banned them from doing it.

If he catches the MC out smoking, he'll usually keep his distance until they've finished (and ideally changed clothes) before calling them in to ask what's wrong.

If they can't keep to the rules, that's when he's going to start having a problem. Cigarette/cigar smoke gives him a headache and he really can’t tolerate it for long…

If they start smoking in places they're not supposed to, then he will try to ban them cold turkey so better stay mindful about it. It wouldn’t take many slip ups unfortunately…

 

Mammon

Yeah… I know some people HC that Mammon smokes too. I wouldn't go that far, but I'll say he's most likely done it before.

Mammon picked up smoking for a century or so from his trips to the human world (humans freaking loved tobacco for some reason) but eventually stopped because the smell annoyed Lucifer and it has some weird effects on Diavolo…

When he caught the MC smoking on their balcony the first time, he was a little surprised because he didn't peg them for the type, but throwing stones in glass houses and all that… Who is he to judge?

Mammon actually likes to stick around during their outdoor smoke sessions. It's a pretty relaxing, dare say intimate, affair. He'll grab a cigarette himself and just let them vent about whatever's bothering them. Zero judgment about it all.

He will warn the MC about Lucifer’s dislike of the smell though… They have to be careful or he'll start getting on their case, you know?

Leviathan 

Smoking is fairly common among badass characters in anime so it's not like he has a super negative image of it to start with, anyway. 🤷‍♀️

Surprisingly understanding of their coping mechanism, I mean, this man has made a life out of his own.

If he sees that they’re out smoking he may pop out to go ask what's up. He won't be much bothered by the smoke unless they blow it right in his face or something (which is a little rude anyway).

Will be a little disappointed that the MC only does it to calm down and they're not actually some kind of secret badass (or maybe they are, I dunno) but he gets the need to have some kind of grounding more than most.

Isn't nearly as bothered by the smell as Lucifer, but not about to jump in and join them like Mammon… He's pretty down the middle about it.

 

Satan

Though he can't fault them for looking for relief, he's done enough research into human health that he really can’t condone this method…

Satan, bless his black soul, is going to be the nag of the family. He will bring up how unhealthy smoking is and he will urge them to try and find a different habit.

To be fair, he did the same to Mammon too - but to a lesser extent because demon bodies can cope with the toxins a lot better. Since the MC is human, he feels a lot of urgency… it comes from a good place.

The MC should expect to have to hide from Satan if they’re out smoking because he will crash their de-stressing with a mini-lecture. He won't go as far as to take the cigarette from their hands, but he will ask them to put it out.

He's not blind to their feelings, though. If they’re smoking, he'll ask what's wrong and how he can help so they can just stop for the night. If they do want to quit, then he's more than willing to support them through the transition. He won't leave them high and dry, but he will make his thoughts known. Be aware of that.

 

Asmodeus 

Uh, don't they know what smoking does to your skin? Your teeth?? Oh no, honey, you gotta try something else!

Yeah like Satan, Asmo isn't a huge fan but unlike Satan he's mostly worried about the physical damages alone. Poor guy can't understand why someone would actively do something with those negative effects when there are much healthier options!

He will pretty much be on a mission to give them other stress relief outlets like massages, bathes, music, meditation, or whatever else he can think of. He'll keep throwing stuff at a wall until it sticks. 🤷‍♀️

Again, it comes from a good place (albeit a somewhat more shallow one) but he cares deeply about them and always wants them to always look their best.

Unfortunately, Asmo's not even coming near them if he sees them smoking. He knows secondhand is a thing and he wouldn’t risk it, but he may call them or text them while they're out there to see what's wrong.

 

Beelzebub 

Beel's pretty easygoing one way or another so I see him accepting the MC's choice with little judgment. Their life and all.

Being an athlete, I also can imagine he may have a bit of knowledge about why it's not good for you but he won’t hammer it in like Satan. He might remind them once or twice if they start coughing because he worries… but that’s about it.

If there's anything he's going to be sad about, though, it's if their smoking habit starts to diminish their sense of taste… There’s so many foods he wants to share with them, he hopes they can enjoy it all… 😥

If Beel sees them out smoking, he'll pull a Levi and just come out to see what's wrong. He may not stay long because he doesn’t want to breathe in too much secondhand (still an athlete and all) but he'll still check in on them… Such a sweet guy.

 

Belphegor 

The smell did take some getting used to, but he used to nap around Mammon all the time so it's not like it's unfamiliar. He can adapt.

Really can't give two shits on whether or not their habit is healthy for them. In the long term, that may bite him in the ass, but that’s also kind of Sloth's whole deal so…

More or less would treat them the exact same way, smoking or not, because that doesn't much affect him or his chances to cuddle them.

If there's anything that is going to bother him, it might be coughing when he's trying to sleep... But that won't be a serious concern unless it gets BAD.

If Belphie sees them out smoking, he'll ask what's wrong… but also if they want to just come inside and sleep the problem off. He's trying to help… in his own way. 🤷‍♀️

 

Diavolo 

Daddy Devil smoked and you can't convince me otherwise.

The smell of cigarettes and cigars kind of give Diavolo a knee-jerk familiar reaction - like when you smell a food or soap that you associate with your childhood. It may not be a good smell or one you even like, but you're drawn to it anyway for the memories.

Doesn't matter how many times the MC has changed clothes or how long they scrub their body for, he can still smell it on them and it's like hitting a lightswitch in his brain - he knows that smell and it's oddly comforting…

Diavolo is going to hover around them a lot. Expect a lot of hugs or just standing a bit too close so he can get a good whiff. Lucifer is going to be utterly confused by his actions but Barbs knows what's up.

The MC is strictly forbidden by Lucifer to smoke anywhere near Diavolo, but that’s hardly going to matter. He can pick up when they've done it recently and he'll ask what's wrong… probably while hugging them because he's looking for that comfort too.

[serenheist]

What Taehyung is like in a relationship/ Taehyung as a boyfriend Tarot reading

How long does it take him to get into a relationship? & Does he prefer long or short term relationships 8 of cups, queen of swords, 10 of pentacles 9 of pentacles reversed, 4 of cups

Ffs the queen of swords always pops up. Anyway yeah I don’t see him getting into anything quickly. He could’ve in the past but I think past relationships left him drained af and feeling alienated. I think he has a shit ton of walls up and is a lot more no nonsense now. It’s probably intimidating and more blunt to others because he wants to get to the heart of why someone is trying to get with him since so many people try to pull the same shit and fuck around with him like he’s dumb. He does not settle for anything other than what he wants. If he can’t find “the one” then he legit just rather be alone. It looks like he’s now more focused on building a Legacy though and something serious and long term so he has no desire to just jump into something with anyone. He basically would wait it out and get to know them long before deciding he trusts them enough and feels comfortable enough to show his emotions and not be so aloof.

I feel like he’d be the type to not show much interest at first because he really needs to scope the person out. So the person probably wouldn’t even know he actually likes them. Actually he could be a little too jaded and bored to the point of turning away everyone even though he does want a relationship. But in his mind there’s too many people being carbon copies and trying to swindle him for his money bruh for real all of bts are having this problem like damn it keeps reoccurring. Idk why it seems like there’s people also trying to use money to get with him like they’re rich and they think he’ll just want someone loaded. Like dude he’s already rich so that doesn’t work and to him them having a ton of money means Jack shit when they have the personality of a damn rock.

Past & present love life 10 of swords, 2 of pentacles present: the hermit, 5 of wands

Past love life: welp. Do I really need to explain the 10 of swords. I think actually that he had all this past trauma and shit from relationships and even other shit he still hasn’t dealt with but there was no time to even process that because he had to get back to work and act like he was fine. I think he’s the type of person that buries himself in his career when he experiences traumatic stuff that he doesn’t want to deal with. And of course it’s easier when you’re busy 24/7 anyway. This relationship betrayed him in every way tbh but maybe it was a catalyst for better things to come though he still might not see this right now. Present: I don’t see him in a relationship now currently cause the hermit but also being a major arcana it’s like he’s really in a life stage right now where he just wants to be alone because there’s so much conflict going on and he’s feeling anxious and having all these negative pessimistic thoughts that he just needs time to himself. I don’t think he very optimistic about his love life right now he’s lost a lot of hope. Things are too chaotic elsewhere to focus on romance.

What is he like in a relationship? the chariot, ace of cup, Unicorn, fae 61, solus 13, vanth, the sun reversed, anger and chains 29, justice, 2 of swords reversed, 3 of cups reversed, avenoir 1, princess of pentacles,ta’om the poet 29, ace of swords, Thanatos

What is he like in a relationship? When he’s in a relationship he really puts all his focus on that person and will go above and beyond for them. There’s a kind of masculine and feminine balance in him in the sense that he’s ready to be the go getter and take charge but there’s also a vulnerable energy and overflowing emotions. He works hard to take care of his person and make the relationship work . The only downside is he could possibly be too smothering to his partner or come on too strongly because of past shit and maybe too clingy for some people since in a relationship he really shows his softer side and he’s not as aloof as he is to others. He loves to have little house parties with his partner and have friends and family over with a ton of food and music.

For date ideas he’s down for anything but especially something “magical” maybe literally some place like Disneyland or pagan festival like beltane? That’s specific af but there’s a medieval type of energy and nature spirits and shit, he wants to do stuff he hasn’t done before and that might even be outside his comfort zone since G. Hobyah card is all about imaginary fears and getting past them. The best qualities he has in a relationship is the ability to help his partner stand on their own 2 feet but also recognizes that you can’t do everything on your own so he’s the type of person who would go above and beyond and connect you to the right people or situations. He’s always there when his partner really needs them and will make sure to put time aside.

His worst quality is that I don’t think he knows how to express his anger in a healthy way. I think with the sun reversed next to anger and chains it’s more like he doesn’t know how to fully show it it’s kinda repressed but his emotions under the exterior are a hot mess and there’s a big need for stability. It’s like being too stubborn to admit when you mess up and petty shit cause it hurts his ego. But I don’t think it’s super bad considering the justice card I used to represent his communication style. I feel that even if he gets mad af he gets over things really quickly and one minute he’s be angry and 10 minutes later he’ll be asking you what you want for dinner like wtf.

When he likes someone he’s not going to jump in and immediately go approach them. I see him instead watching them intently from afar lol he’s very cautious and like gathering everything he can on that person. Dude’s a 1st class stalker. Jk But the thing is the person wont even know he is interested in them because he keeps a serious face as a kind of mask but on the inside he’s like a giddy kid. Ta’om is known for looking serious and thoughtful but is actually very playful and slightly mischievous. I think Taehyung is definitely one to start off as friends and slowly get to know someone rather than just start dating because he really wants to know that person well to see how real they are and if they’re just putting up a front.

He’s not attracted to new shiny things that are perfect he’s able to see the beauty in all things even in difficulty. After he’s been friends with them for awhile and knows if that person like him back, that’s when he’d actually make a move. He finds a lot of satisfaction in doing services for others until they’re completed so it makes me think his love language (giving) is acts of service but with the ace of swords is pretty obvious his Receiving love language is words of affirmation but moreso he appreciates when someone is blunt and honest and not just saying stuff to make him feel better cause then it’s just insincere.

What is his ideal type? the ageless, the star, the singer of healing 10, el shaddai, protection 26, ram, the maestro, fae 41, the sage 19, king of cups reversed, himself 17, danu, death reversed, obsession

His type: this person seems to have had some messed up stuff happen to them in their past. Even when others were horrible to them they still kept their dignity and chose to still give to others instead of give in to bitterness and despair. It’s like the Phoenix where no matter how many times they metaphorically die, they can still rise up even better than before. I think they’re able to help heal others because they’ve been through the trauma themselves but they know how to be honest and blunt without being overly mean about it. They have a kid of tough exterior though I think from years of negativity from people that’s made them strong but also a little distant from people and they need a lot of time to themselves to recharge and get away from peoples bs. Honestly this seems a lot like Taehyung too lol I think he wants someone who’s been through similar traumas.

The ram keeps calling out to me that I think this persons way of showing love is a little aggressive but that’s what Taehyung likes in someone tbh. It’s not like actually showing love it’s hard to explain. It’s more so you know when someone tries to act like sarcastic and shit to hide the fact that they like someone? Idk why it reminds me of toph from avatar the last airbender where she just punches people to show affection it’s kinda like that. Cause they’re not good at being really vulnerable. They put on this brave face and are pretty good at it to the point where you won’t notice that they’re jealous seeing you hang out with someone else. But this person is really independent like I’m not joking lmao and a go getter they don’t rely on anyone really. And don’t give a fuck who you are.

There’s 2 healing cards and honestly why is this person so similar to Taehyung lol this person is great at helping or healing others but again has to realize it’s okay to also get help for yourself. They think maybe that they’re fine on their own and they don’t like relying on others for help because people disappoint you and it’s easier to just do it yourself. But they’re really good at giving advice and are lot nicer than their exterior let’s on. Bruh the star card makes my mind keep playing that I’m gonna be a star song by twice lmao stop. I think this person actually is a star or is working up to it cause they have huge plans. This isn’t someone just wanting a mundane job I think they’re gonna go big.

Especially paired with the ram talking about they go for big dreams and huge successes. This person won’t stop until they accomplish their dreams they really don’t care what others say and will go to the extremes to get there. I see they have a lot of talents anyway but some people were like saying negative shit that their dreams are impossible but they’re learning to set boundaries with other people and it’s more of a just move in silence energy. Also usually I don’t say zodiac signs but since it’s a major arcana it might play some significance but Aquarius might be prominent in their chart (nvm I just remembered Taehyung has venus in Aquarius so duh you dumbass it wouldn’t be that out there to think he’d be drawn to Aquarius qualities).

I wonder if this person is into astrology though given all the glyphs. I think this is someone Taehyung has been trying to manifest and call in too like wishing on a star for a looooong time and maybe thought it wouldn’t come but boy does the universe have a surprise for you. They really are future oriented thinkers and know a lot about spirituality I think that a big part of who they are I really don’t think they’d be completely atheist or not care about spiritual topics. They give a lot without much thought in return and can talk about anything with openness and honesty. With Taehyung they’d teach him everything under the sun. He likes when he can share all this knowledge especially about weirder topics with someone who isn’t going to dismiss him. I see them really encouraging him to try new things and show him things he never knew were possible. They treat him like he finally belongs somewhere in the world.

This shit is kinda spooky because both the maestro guy and illbe the retriever are holding orbs/a little white ball close to them and they speak of the same thing. This person really protects Taehyungs hopes and dreams. Also they themselves obviously represent a dream that Taehyung thought was long gone and impossible. I think it can be taken literally too lol to mean that when Taehyung is being forgetful af. This person is that type of person who has your keys already when you think you lost them. They’re really the more responsible one in the relationship lmao helping him to be more organized and get his life together. The next set of cards I used to represent what his biggest turn ons are. This isn’t in a sexual way though lmao I meant the qualities he likes the most in his ideal type. Already I noticed how all the cards are facing straight ahead and looking right at you so it makes me think this person has some intense ass eye contact and looks intimidating and they got a rbf.

With the king of cups reversed I don’t think they’re actually these heartless cold bitches and that Taehyung is turned on by that because the sage card is upright and talks about the same shit but this is a person definitely who looks colder but is actually kind on the inside. He kinda likes people who look cold like that but are actually sweethearts. This person is not one of those super lovey-dovey people or uses pet names and babytalk like “my sweet baby Taehyung” whatever I think they find it very cringe. They have some trauma from when they were kids where they felt as if they aren’t allowed to act very emotional because people will think they’re weak and take advantage of them (this is just their beliefs about themselves) they instead act very macho or tough again lol like Toph from ATLA idk why I keep thinking of her but there’s like a kinda tomboy energy but they’re really not heartless they just need the right person to feel comfortable around and need to work on opening up emotionally.

There’s so much masculine and yang energy but then at the end you see this motherhood figure so it again really makes me think it’s a front and this person is so nurturing and that’s what really draw Taehyung to them. He loves the most that this person knows so much about the most random things and esoteric topics. They value tradition and stability but they also understand the need for growth and change they’re the perfect balance. Communication is really a big thing for Taehyung it’s a reoccurring theme in this. Someone who is very good at communicating and are action oriented. They say what they mean and mean what they say. It’s very important that they are their own unique individual self and have their own goals and skills and hobbies.

This person is probably a powerful manifester too and sets their intentions and goes after them. They have so much power and confidence also with the himself card they could be a dancer or love dance since he’s a dancer faerie they’re very much into creative shit. They seem very natural and not the type who got work done or wears too much makeup idk there’s like a wild energy lol like this bitch is from the damn forest. If someone attacked Taehyung this person would literally drop kick someone even if the person was bigger than them. Danu card is always protective and nurturing but ferocious if you mess with their person. Like “idc what you do to me but if you touch my guy I’ll end you”.

Now onto what Taehyung’s biggest turn offs in general are: death reversed and obsessed card lol oh god bro I am fucking done. His biggest turn off is when someone makes him the center of their universe. I mean this in the extreme way like “omg you’re my one and only we’re meant to be I think about you 5000 times a day and have an entire closet with all your pictures and I document your entire life” 👀 and he’s like uhh can you get a damn hobby? (That doesn’t involve me) Cause imagine someone’s entire life revolves around you. It’s sweet at first I guess? Lmaoo then it’s just creepy and like they have no life or personality without you. Death reversed is like something is plaguing you and following you around, pestering and annoying you. He must’ve experienced this shit irl lmao if it’s this strong with a major arcana to come up as a turn off. Cause major arcana are big ass life lessons. Like they thought he wouldn’t know they were secretly obsessed with his ass and used other people like his friends to get closer to him but I’m telling you Taehyungs intuition is something else and he always knows when people are some obsessed crazies. This is exactly why he’s so cautious now because of bs like that he can’t trust anyone. Like please stop acting like Jodi Arias and have some self respect.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 300: Days of Our Todorokis

Previously on BnHA: Hawks was all “hey Jeanist, wanna go on a road trip with me to my mom’s house?” Jeanist was all “you know it,” and so they hopped into Jeanist’s jercedes and took off. Hawks took a nap and had a flashback to his Dickensian childhood living in a abject poverty with his jerk mom and jerk dad, thinking heroes were make-believe until one day Endeavor arrested his dad and Baby Hawks was all “OH SHIT.” And then he saved a bunch of people, and the HPSC was all “what do we have here,” and blah blah blah, you know the rest. Back in the present, Hawks was all “well my life is currently in shambles, but on the plus side there’s no one bossing me around anymore so that’s pretty cool,” and then decided he was going to talk to Endeavor. Fandom was all “I can’t believe Hawks would side with his childhood hero over the man who burned his wings off and posted a video calling him a violent murderer who took after his abusive dad,” so that was fun and stuff. I can’t wait to see what piping fresh takes this new chapter will bring.

Today on BnHA: Our old friend Carbonation Carl tries to loot a Starbucks and gets his ass kicked by a senior citizen. Society is all “YEAH, WE’RE REALLY STARTING TO GET SICK OF THIS SHIT.” Old Man Samurai is all “this room won’t stop me because I can’t read it” and abruptly decides to retire, which, fun fact, is literally THE LEAST HELPFUL THING ANYONE HAS EVER DONE. Anyway so then a bunch of other punkasses follow suit, and while I won’t say that I’m actually starting to root for Stain to kill some peeps, just for the record I’m not not saying that either. Back in the hospital, Endeavor cries some tears because his life sucks, and then is confronted by his entire family, LED BY QUEEN REI, FIRST OF HER NAME, BACK IN BUSINESS AND LARGE AND IN CHARGE. Rei is all “fuck feeling sorry for yourself, we have a rogue Murder Son on the loose” and I swear to god I have never felt so alive.

so here we go! and just for the record, even though the last two chapters have been phenomenal, I don’t necessarily have any sky-high expectations for chapter 300, mostly because chapters 100 and 200 consisted of Mei Boobs, and Toadette and her horrific quirk lmao. so go ahead Horikoshi, what are you gonna pull out of your hat for this one

oh, back to this stuff again. sob

I guess there was only so much time we could spend having hospital antics and exploring Hawks’s past before we got back to dealing with the whole “the world has gone to absolute shit” issue huh, lol

omg

what’s with these bizarrely cute Noumus. why do I want to pet them

so the narrative text is going on about how people have been super paranoid about the Noumu ever since the USJ incident a year ago. so yeah, I guess the fact that there are now a bunch of them confirmed to be running around is really freaking people out even on top of everything else

wtf is happening here

what did this poor lil glass ever do to anyone. r.i.p.

OH MY FUCKING GOD

SODA SAM IS BACK ON THE LAM

tsk tsk tsk. my man has graduated from snatching purses to raiding cafes. going after that big money. this man has no business sense whatsoever lmao

OH BUT WATCH IT NOW!!

OH SNAP THE PEOPLE ARE FIGHTING BACK. WHATCHA GONNA DO NOW SAM

THIS MAN IS 172 YEARS OLD AND HE’S NOT HERE TO PLAY GAMES!!

WTF IS HE LIGHTING THIS THING ON FIRE OR SOME SHIT. GETTEM GRANDPA YEAHHHH HE’S CHARGING AT EM YEAHHHHHH

lmao so that was fun. and now we’re cutting to Wash!! omg. look at him

he’s so dedicated. too bad you don’t have a car like Best Jeanist. probably takes a while when you’re just running everywhere

you see?? you were too slow!!

NOOOO, GRANDPA. he defeated Pepsi Pete, but lost his life in the process. this is too tragic

anyway so the good news is that the cafe has been saved! but the bad news is, there really isn’t much of a cafe left. huh. I guess that’s one of the reasons why people are supposed to get a license to use their quirks like this

oh snap and now everyone is coming outside, and they’re none too happy to see poor old Wash over here

seriously Wash, get a bicycle or something. also the way this guy is gesturing so dramatically with his hand in this sort of “YOU SEE!! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!” manner is sending me

OH MY GOD

HE SPEAKS. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS. IT MEANS JEANS PUNS ARE YESTERDAY’S NEWS, FOLKS!! MAKE WAY FOR THE LAUNDRY PUNS. CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH THIS ALL... UNFOLD

“the heroes had dwindled away” okay real talk you guys, it is literally only a matter of time before they press-gang the children into picking up their slack. I still don’t know how to feel about that, but it is happening one way or the other regardless. Child Soldiers 2 Electric Boogaloo. wonder if we’ll see a rise in vigilante action as well

OHO WHAT’S THIS? THIS IS A CHAPTER OF GRANDPAS HUH

-- no fucking way

WOW. WOW. WOWWWWWW

wow. so he didn’t do a fucking thing while the rest of the top ten were being turned into red mist in the previous arc, and now that it’s all over and they need his help more than ever, he decides... THAT IT’S TIME TO RETIRE. holy shit. “fuck you” doesn’t even begin to cover it my guy. you stand there and soak up those boos you coward

ohhhhhhh shiiiiit you guys. oh shit

the “I am not here” breaks my fucking heart for real though y’all. oh man. everything he worked for is gone just like that

(ETA: okay so a couple of the takes I’ve seen on this make it seem like All Might is somehow the bad guy here?? “this is what happens when society puts a bunch of glorified cops on a pedestal”, “finally the cracks in hero society are showing”, etc. etc. so, just a friendly reminder that this isn’t happening because of too much trust and a lack of critical thinking; this is happening because the villains killed all the heroes and broke a bunch of murderers out of jail. it’s happening because an organized league of terrorists succeeded in terrorizing, and so society is now understandably awash in fear and panic. like, it’s just wild to me that AFO is RIGHT FUCKING THERE, and yet week after week fandom still has their “IT’S ALL THE HEROES’ FAULT” signs still up on their lawns. BUT WHATEVER, MOVING ON.)

also though, so exactly how much time is passing here now? I wanted to go straight back to the hospital and see what happens with Deku and the Todorokis. please don’t tell me we’re jumping ahead sob. my aaaaangst

OH SHIT

STAIN. LISTEN UP BUDDY. I KNOW WE’VE HAD OUR DIFFERENCES, AND I STILL DESPISE YOU FOR CRIPPLING TENSEI AND TRYING TO KILL MY BEST BOY TENYA. BUT AS IT HAPPENS, THERE ARE ONE OR TWO OTHER HEROES OUT THERE NOW WHO I WOULDN’T MIND YOU PAYING A VISIT I’M JUST SAYING

LOL BUT IT ACTUALLY ISN’T THIS MAN, FFFFFF

sob. yeah I was talking about Old Man Samurai actually but YEAH. HEY THERE ENJI

also is this entire hospital actually run by characters from Super Mario Bros though. first Yoshi and now this guy, come the fuck on that is not a coincidence

lmao they stuck him in another one of these cavernous creepy hospital rooms

wtf is it with Horikoshi and these giant fucking rooms lately. Kacchan’s in chapter 298, then Tomie’s colossal house furnished with like one table and a TV, and now this. and the weirdest thing about it though is that “huge space with nothing to fill it up” is like the exact opposite of what you’ll usually find in Japanese homes lol

so now Enji is just sitting there thinking things like “my head is fuzzy” and “I’m alive” lmao okay. not quite all there yet, huh. I’ll give you a minute

I’m so fucking curious as to who his first visitor is going to be omg. either way it’s going to be interesting af, and either way fandom is probably going to feel some way about it but OH WELL

okay now his thoughts are getting more coherent! and he’s remembering Touya, and feeling regret for freezing up and forcing Shouto to deal with everything instead

!!! OH HERE GOES BRACE YOURSELVES Y’ALL IT’S ABOUT TO GET SPICY

NO TOUYA PLEASE DON’T CRY HONEY NO PLEASE

ohhhhhhh man

okay, I mean I didn’t expect you to, but so instead then you’re just going to do... what? lie there and wallow in regret and self-pity for the rest of your life? son you know that’s not how we deal with our problems here in Shounen

though also, I totally do get it though. honestly, thinking on it, I probably would have been disappointed with any other response. but so this is where the rest of his family (including his adopted son) come into play now though, because like it or not they’re all in this thing together. and so friends, I am once again asking you WHO IS GOING TO BE THE ONE TO VISIT ENJI FIRST

AHHHHHHH

KRANCH!!!! OMG AND THE OTHERS ARE SO TINY NEXT TO HIM THAT I ALMOST DIDN’T SEE THEM AT FIRST. IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE TWENTY MILES AWAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS REGULATION HOCKEY RINK OF A ROOM

holy shit I’m so excited lkjlklhlglkasdsjldfk

SDKFJLSKHLKJL

the way she has him by his collar lmaoooo. “lol nah you’re not going anywhere pal.” damn straight, siblings have to be ride or die in situations like this. banding together for survival. strength in numbers

OH MY STARS I’M JUST WARNING YOU NOW THAT I’M ABOUT TO DISSECT EVERY LAST REMAINING PANEL OF THIS CHAPTER PROBABLY YOU GUYS. WE COULD BE HERE A WHILE

love how Fuyu has absolutely no idea how to segue into THE SINGLE MOST AWKWARD CONVERSATION SHE’S EVER HAD, so she just GOES FOR IT in pure small talk mode like they’re meeting up for brunch somewhere

I KNOW IT’S A SMALL THING, BUT I APPRECIATE THAT THE FIRST THING ENJI ASKS IS WHETHER THEY’RE OKAY

lastly while I can’t wait for more of this delicious Natsu angst, I also just have to say that Enji has as much reason to cry right now as anyone on the planet. you can’t deny that being confronted by your not-dead-but-you-thought-he-was-dead son who’s all “SURPRISE DAD I GREW UP TO BE A MASS MURDERER AND I HATE YOU AND EVERYTHING IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND NOW I’M GONNA MAIM YOUR OTHER KID” with a side order of “EVERYONE HATES YOU AND SOCIETY IS CRUMBLING AND NOTHING WILL EVER BE GOOD EVER AGAIN” is enough to bum pretty much anyone out. there’s a Pagliacci the Clown joke here somewhere. BUT DOCTOR, I AM THE NUMBER ONE HERO

oh man lol he is seriously falling apart

damn. like you guys, I’m sorry, go ahead and cancel me, but I do feel compassion for the man. it’s therapeutic for me to see an abuser actually feel remorse and be truly sorry and want to change and want to make it up to his family. and it’s also compelling as fuck to read a narrative about a family that’s trying to grapple with that, because let me tell you straight up, as someone who’s done a version of that song and dance -- it is exhausting. it is a piping hot mess. it’s a gigantic mishmosh of extremely volatile emotions that all somehow all contradict one another. love, hurt, hope, anger, betrayal, resentment, attachment, longing. it’s something you can both be desperate for and also want nothing at all to do with. and attempting to portray all of that and write about it is a monumental task, and one which Horikoshi has done so, so delicately thus far, and damn but I appreciate it. anyway, so I’m here and I’m ready for my latest helping of Todoroki Fam Feels you guys

GASP

oh man. OHMANOHMANOHMAN. CAN IT REALLY BE. IS THIS THE REDEMPTION ARC OF CHAPTERS 100 AND 200???

LMAO SHE’S ALL “WE ALL FEEL BAD YOU JACKASS STOP CRYING ABOUT IT”

LAY INTO HIM REI!! SORRY ENJI YOUR PITY PARTY HAS BEEN CANCELLED IN FAVOR OF A “SO WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT” PARTY COURTESY OF QUEEN ELSA OVER HERE. THE PEOPLE TOOK A VOTE AND WE WANT LESS WHINING AND MORE ACTION

oh my god look at this lady folks

NOTE THE HAIR BLOWING IN THE NONEXISTENT WIND. NOW WE KNOW WHERE SHOUTO GOT THIS POWER FROM

(ETA: btw guys, seeing Rei handle this crisis like an absolute champ despite everything she’s been through is everything, though. I’m reminded of Hawks’s line last week about people sometimes unexpectedly finding liberation when they’re backed into a corner. like things may be shit but goddammit her kiddos need her.)

THE CHAPTER IS ALREADY ENDING SOB, IT’S ONLY A 17-PAGER THIS WEEK, BUT GODDAMN WHAT A WAY TO CLOSE

oh my god. oh my god oh my god. AND FUCK YOU HORIKOSHI FOR CUTTING IT OFF THERE sob. it’s like each week the wait for the next chapter becomes more painful. the Todofam is about to get real, and on top of that Hawks is gonna crash the party at some point down the line, and on top of that we’re still waiting for Kacchan to have his own heartfelt discussion about What The Fuck Are We Supposed To Do Next with his best friend who’s currently in a coma. all I want to do with my life is read about these three things, and all I can do is simply wait as they are portioned out in agonizing, addicting little installments every week

anyway! tune in next time as we answer the question of whether or not fandom will finally run its train of logic all the way through to its natural conclusion and somehow manage to cancel Noted Abuse Apologist Todoroki Fucking Rei. don’t act like it can’t happen. you all know nothing is sacred lol. anyways but I’m ready for anything lol, bring it

[burnedbyshoto]

I really hate you

— Shinsou knows he shouldn’t trust villains. Especially villains who make his mind spin and stomach twist in joy. But there’s something about you that keeps him coming back for more.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

pairing: pro hero!shinsou hitoshi x villain fem!reader

warnings: 18+, smut, a little bit of juicy plot, pro hero!au, reader is a villain, betrayal, biting, marking, collaring, cursing, hate sex, rooftop sex, body liquids, angst

word count: 8,180

a/n: i like deception :) being a chem TA is pretty fun, except when im in lab for 8 am until 4 pm. listen,,, I also really liked this prompt I made last night because the one I had before wasn’t spicy enough for me anymore. I hope you enjoy though! like comment and share for the algorithm (jk been watching too many tikytokys)

kinktober day 8 main kink: collaring

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

When the sun sets, and the moon is high in the sky, and the chill of the bitter cold winds raise ceaseless goosebumps on your arms, and the only people who are up are drunken businessmen and tiresome students, it is a common belief that this is when the freaks come out.

The freaks come out to play at night.

You are one of these freaks.

Heh.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

Shinsou nodded at his friends as he walked through the doors of the agency he worked at. Despite the power of his quirks ability, he was an underground hero (unless the ultra-rare occasion where they needed his quirk in the limelight); he was stationed within a large, well-known agency and was one of the founding heroes there at that. His ability to be hidden from the bright lights of the world were both easy and challenging; most of the world knew him as the kid from UA’s Sports Festival that went toe to toe with nearing number one Pro-Hero Deku. It both irked and embarrassed him when that event was brought up; on the one hand, it was true! He had nearly beat Midoriya during that final stage. Yet, on the other hand, their memories seemed to recall some crazy quirk-fueled fistfight where Midoriya had broken his entire body in the duration of their fight. 

‘No,’ he often found himself responding back to the gentlemen and ladies who would awe at his school-day adventures, ‘there was a fistfight, but Midoriya handled it without using his quirk except to snap him out of my quirk.’

They always looked embarrassingly horrified by their faulty memory when they pulled the clip up on Youtube, their bows quick in apology before they made off. 

But people recognizing him from that was rare as it gets, fortunately even with the large agency stapled to his alias, he was quite good at his job—a shadow in the night, an urgent whisper to the villain freaks who roamed the night.

“Ah, Shinsou-chan!” Kaminari pouted, his body draping over his purple-haired friend as Shinsou moved to change from his regular clothes into the black triple-weave kevlar of his hero suit. He had once sported a black cotton-like costume akin to Aizawa, but after many, many gun shootings and stabbing incidents, he figured he needed something sturdier. 

“What is it?” he asked, rising up from his bent position so that Kaminari couldn’t take advantage of his slouched form. 

Shinsou’s tired, purple eyes met the exhausted pair of Kaminari.

“Today was so hard,” Kaminari sighed, his lip still put into the stupid pout, and he slumped onto the bench behind Shinsou. His feet were spread before him, fingers drumming onto his directional equipment. “Since it’s winter, the night comes sooo much earlier now. I swear some weirdos really appear out of the woodworks when the night comes! Like just before I was going to make my way back here, I swear I saw Aizawa-sensei hanging out on the rooftops like some super-secret ninja, right?”

Shinsou frowned. He knew his mentor turned friend was actually on vacation at the moment in Hawaii. Something he thought, at the very least, was long overdue. 

“Aizawa is in Hawaii right now,” Shinsou quickly spoke, his hands buckling the belt on his pants, before moving to lace up his boots. 

“Oh fuck, I told Todoroki he was in Seoul,” Kaminari cursed, the palm of his hand hitting his forehead. 

“Good going, who knows what weird message or gift he’ll end up sending to Aizawa now,” Shinsou couldn’t help the small smirk from spreading on his face at that note.

After being accepted into the Hero Course over in UA, Shinsou couldn’t help but be initially disappointed when he was placed within Class 1-B — Class 2-B at that point — simply because his mentor was with Class 1-A. The initial disappointment didn’t last very long when he got to know the rest of Class 2-B better, and he saw that while 2-A possessed raw talent, 2-B were more well-defined with a much bigger take-no-shit mentality that he appreciated more. That and 2-A were being strangled by a new villain of the month far too often, and Shinsou just wanted nothing more than to graduate from high school. 

Still, his lack of enrollment in Class 2-A didn’t mean that he didn’t see the rambunctious, nearly intolerable group of twenty in class 2-A. As a matter of fact, he thought he saw them a bit more than he’d like. Aizawa was his mentor, so he understood seeing him around, but for some reason, 2-A was never too far away. As soon as Shinsou was admitted into the Hero Course and the two hero classes had weekly meals together, which meant that to him, just the slightest bit, 2-A felt like an unwanted, annoying, ugly stepchild.

So no, Shinsou could not tell you 2-A’s inside class jokes, but he knew a lot more about the forty other hero students than he’d ever like to admit. 

And through his knowledge, he knew that the ever so powerful Todoroki Shouto was an idiot, probably a bigger one than Kaminari.

“I hate that you call Aizawa-sensei just…” Kaminari trailed off, a disgusted shiver running down his spine as if it sickened him to remove the single formality.

“Aizawa,” Shinsou said once more.

“Stop.”

“Aizawa.”

“Hitoshi!”

“Aizawa.”

“PLEASE!”

“Shouta.”

Kaminari hit the floor, his chest heaving with fake, bitter sobs while Shinsou couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight of his over-dramatic friend on the ground. He had to admit, Shouta felt weird on his tongue too.

“Stop making a huge deal about how Aizawa and I are closer than you are,” Shinsou half-joked half-told-the-truth.

He was more than well aware of his mentor’s former students trying to become even closer to their beloved homeroom teacher. All doing it in their own ways, all relatively unsuccessful because unknown to them (but not Shinsou), Aizawa already loved them all thoroughly, not that he’ll ever tell them.

“I DIDN’T MEAN TO SHAVE OFF MITTENS FUR!”

Oh yeah, that had lost a lot of love points for Kaminari.

Sighing softly, Shinsou placed his newly replaced coiled capturing weapon around his shoulders, and his artificial vocal cords mask onto his chest until he was off on patrol.

“Why’d you think you saw Aizawa?” he asked again, trying to finish the conversation so that he could leave. It felt like it was going to be a long night if Kaminari confirmed where his thoughts were already trailing. 

“Hm?” Kaminari finally looked up from his puddle of tears on the floor, tears streaking all over his face, small charges of electricity humming off it. He blinked once, twice, his eyes shooting to the ceiling as if the answer was there before his fist came down to hit his open palm in a flash of realization. “Oh, I remember! There was this person, obviously not Aizawa-sensei, standing by the edge of a building watching everyone below. Hair whipping in the wind and his capturing weapon fluttering around them!”

Just as Shinsou thought.

“Where did you see her?”

“Her?!”

“Where, Kaminari?”

“Uh… well, I guess by Gramps convenience store. Don’t tell me this is some super sexy megafan of yours! Wait… do tell me, or… no, I’ll get jealous if you’re having rooftop sex with — eh?! where are you going?! Hitoshi?!”

“My shift started two minutes ago,” Shinsou explained, one of his hands lifting in a wave as he exited the locker room, his heart hammering quickly, knowing just who he was going to need to track down tonight.

…

..

.

It was dark.

Shinsou’s eyes squinting as he hopped from one rooftop onto the other, his capturing device assisting him in clearing the dooming crevice. He wasn’t exactly the most physically threatening, and unfortunately, that also meant he wasn’t exactly the greatest at parkour type movements, although he was getting better. Maybe had he started to ask for earlier shifts, where he would be out when the sun was, he could get better faster.

It was tricky with only the moonlight to guide him, but that’s what he could get at the moment.

As he scuffled through the gravel rooftop of one of the abandoned buildings, Shinsou found himself squinting at the figure in the distance. The one perched near what Kaminari oh so fondly refers to as Gramps convenience store.

He studied the form of the picture still person, noticing if it wasn’t for the slight wind through your hair and twisting capturing weapon around your neck, he would think you’re a statue. But he knows better now, he’s known better for quite some time now. 

“What’re you doing out here, y/l/n?” Shinsou found himself speaking the moment he stepped behind you, hands shoving into his pant pockets.

You didn’t move, nor did you respond, your body still completely still while peering down at the empty world fascinated on who knows what.

“Y/l—”

“How can I help ya, Mindjack-senpai?” you interrupted him, your gaze still not removed from the world below the building. “I hear it’s supposed to be a busy night tonight.”

Shinsou paused, his brows scrunching at your words.

It was plain to see to Heroes that you were a villain, you did what you wanted when you wanted, whatever the price, but if there was one thing Shinsou had learned with this rather weird cat and mouse game the two of you played time and time again was that you didn’t lie. 

What was happening?

“A busy night?” Shinsou questioned, his quirk still unactivated, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to Brainwash an answer out of you anyways. “Where at?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know, Mr. Hero?” you teased slowly, and Shinsou had to deny the way that the way your head finally turned to lock eyes with his made his stomach clench.

It meant nothing.

Nothing at all.

“You know what happens when you slight me,” Shinsou couldn’t help but warn, the bandages on his neck rising under his command. But your eyes blinked slowly, lips spreading into a lazy, cunning smile.

“And you know what happens when you underestimate me,” you returned, fingers gliding against his old weapon — yes, old weapon. Just two months ago, just before your last arrest, you had viciously stolen it from him, your foot crushing his vocal cords while you managed to pry the weapon from his broken fingers. “Anyways, Mindjack-senpai, it’s a bit unethical of you, a hero, to be threatening me in such a way! I’m just a poor girl waiting for the love of my life to show up.”

“And have they?”

You blink, a soft giggle escaping your lips as you nod, “I got him right where I want him.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Shinsou snapped despite the lick of warmth against his chest and cheeks. “I’ll have you arrested again.”

Now, this has you turning from the edge of the building, you sit on the ledge of the building, fingers supporting your head as you stare at him without fear. Shinsou really fucking hated how fast you riled him up.

“Arrested? But Mr. Mindjack-senpai, didn’t you know?” you ask, the taunt evident in your voice, the twinkle in your eye devastatingly bright. “I’m a changed woman. I’m what you call a hero now. You wouldn’t arrest an innocent heroine, could you?”

“You’re hardly innocent,” Shinsou responded back smoothly and deftly, not at all yet entirely impressed by you. “I’ll believe it when I see it.” 

He blamed his deep impressions of you on the stupid black and purple attire you wore.

“Well, you know as well as I do that I just got out, but I feel like except what happened two days ago, I’ve really changed,” you emptily promise, pushing off the ledge, sauntering closer to Shinsou until he felt the tip of your nose brush against his. “I’ll make sure to think about you whenever… bad feelings come up.”

He prays you don’t see the scarlet flush on his face.

You’re already back at the ledge when he blinks, and he watches you raise two fingers to your temple in a mock salute as you wink at him.

“You didn’t hear it from me, but two blocks east, seven blocks south from the heart of Tokyo is where you’ll find trouble,” you inform him, dropping the salute as you turn to run.

But Shinsou wants his damn weapon back.

“Y/l/n, wait!”

“Yes—?”

You froze at the ledge, your eyes spacing out, and Shinsou sighed, moving to collect his weapon from you until you suddenly dove off the building, a burst of cheerful laughter on your tongue.

“Oh, I forgot to tell ya!” you screamed from the next building over, your fingers threading through the alloy metal cloths. “I got some earbuds just for when you’re around! They make your voice into electrical signals just for me! So guess what?!”

Shinsou didn’t need you to complete that sentence in order for him to realize what you had just gotten your hands onto.

As long as you wore those, his quirk was useless against you.

Despite knowing that a villain held the key to his demise as a hero, he chuckled, running a hand through his short purple hair.

You really were something.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

Shinsou never took himself as an especially suspicious person.

He figured he had days where he was suspicious of some people the correct amount, especially when they had the most painted on emotions he’s ever seen. Some days he was overly trusting and blamed tight smiles on something acute to nerves. Without meaning to brag, he felt like he was healthily suspicious of people, unlike others he knew who wouldn’t dare to interact with anyone new or would spill their darkest secret to anyone who would listen.

But there was something entirely, conspicuously suspicious with how you were behaving.

Winter had long passed, the long winter nights and graveyard shifts of endless freak encounters had worn a hole in his patience and boots. The spring season was beginning to end, and the warm days and nights of summer were setting on his skin.

Six full months of you, the first-ever villain he had fought as a Pro Hero, the first-ever villain to have openly flirted with him and to have him flirt back, being suspiciously… kind. 

Every shift of his, he would find you waiting for him on one of the regular rooftops. Every time he would check in with the database to make sure you weren’t wanted for some crime to find that you were innocent. Every time he would feel pissed off because you wore those earbuds that rendered his quirk useless and you somehow mastered the capturing weapon within weeks.

Now Shinsou didn’t pout, he really didn’t, but there were moments where you would appear from behind him, finger swiping down his spine as you effortlessly twirled around him, a stupid sly grin on your face as you held onto the collar of his hero costume.

“Don’t pout, Mindjack-senpai, I’m here now,” you’d purr each and every time.

He loved the dangerous purr to your voice, the way your eyes hooded over, peering at him through your eyelashes, but he knew better. He had to know better. It wasn’t that villains were terrible people per se; he’d learned a lot of villains were just thoroughly sick of being mistreated (and he had wondered what would have happened if he had been denied from UA… would he be one?). He knew that for the most part, you were quite harmless, merely sticking your nose where it didn’t belong, living a life to your personal laws and rules.

It didn’t make you evil, merely dangerous.

But he had a job to do where even if it was justifiable to beat the ever-living shit out of your sister's abuser, nearly murdering him in rage and refusing to calm down when Shinsou had arrived on the scene with the use of his quirk didn't hold up well in court. It had started this long chain of events where you had absolutely hated him for a time as you were forced to stay overnight in a jailhouse. And many horrible days afterward where you performed what Shinsou had thought to be illegal actions only to find that no, they weren’t. As a matter of fact, entirely legal because Japan had yet to update their codes. 

Long after he had discovered this, you had returned to actual crime, your physical ability growing by leaps and bounds as he ran after you after catching you doing something dangerously illegal. Shinsou was a proud hero and was incredibly proud of the impact he made as a Pro Hero, but it was clear as day, even to him, that he often let you slip through his fingers. Like a child opening their cupped fingers and wondering why the water had left.

He wasn’t sure what it was about you that made him act this way, but he certainly didn’t wish to find out.

“So what’s on the schedule today, Mindjack-senpai?” you asked, appearing from the shadows of the rooftop, not scaring Shinsou in the slightest as this was always where you greeted him. “Are we saving the Prime Minister today? Stealing — I mean, protecting those stupid bedazzled eggs in the museum? Perhaps solving an unsolvable case?”

“Smooth,” Shinsou snarked, his tired purple eyes piercing through your bright ones that seemed undoubtedly excited. “How many times do I gotta tell you that there aren't that many actual case assignments? Besides, most team-ups happen in the morning when I’m asleep.”

“Being a hero is so boring!”

“You’re not a hero.”

“Am too!” Shinsou snorted, turning on his heel and began walking away, listening to your footsteps running after him to keep up with his long paces as you cried that out.

“No.”

“Yes!”

“No.”

“Yes!”

Shinsou stopped, his eyebrow raised in slight forced annoyance but much more amusement, when you spun in front of him, hand on his chest, cheeks puffing with your heavy breathes.

“Look!”

Tilting his head back, Shinsou grunted when your phone was shoved in his face. “What is this?”

“Hero Commission Regulation Handbook, page fifty-four, Article three, sub-article twenty-three,” you chirped, turning your phone back to yourself so that you may read it correctly. “It states that besides attending hero school like a bunch of nerds, civilians have the option of securing internships with approved Pro Heroes and work side by side with them for six months! Once finishing their internships, said Pro Hero must simply sign my licensing papers and bam, a hero I’ll become.”

“And which sniveling hero did you get to do your dirty work?” Shinsou scoffed, not at all buying the notion that you of all people wanted to become a hero. A vigilante at best, an anti-hero much more realistically, and staying a villain as default.

“You,” you smirked, winking at him before turning on your heel and sauntering off, knowing full well the patterns of his routines. 

Shinsou sighed, but he let a familiar smirk fall on his face as he walked after you, enjoying the way you glanced back at him with your wide clear eyes. But that suspicious, gut feeling didn’t leave his core, no matter how sweet and beautiful he found your smile. 

“So, Mindjack-senpai, who are we apprehending today?”

“You want me to sign your paper this entire time, and you’ve been addressing me as senpai?” Shinsou commented, his weapon shooting off to a nearby building, snapping straight in his hand when it was ready. “Where are your manners? It’s Mindjack-sensei to you.”

He didn’t wait for your response, choosing to swing off the ledge of the building with no hesitation, but a part of him wished he could have heard the sound of your laugh he only seemed to hear through the streaming, far away air.

…

… 

While usually, Shinsou didn’t have actual cases during his patrols, this job, after all, was much more spontaneous than anything else, today was different.

Today was different altogether, really.

First off, he showed up to work when the sun was still up just to get his meeting intel down in time for him to be out on the scene in time. He had nodded plenty, silently taking in Creati’s information on the drug cartel they wanted to in the next few weeks take down for numerous charges. The creation of dangerous, illegal drugs, prostitution rings, robbery, and murder being the main ones. It was some bigger stuff, so they needed all the evidence they could get.

Shinsou stared at the faces of the more prominent names of the cartel, studying every crook, nanny, and scar on their faces as Creati simply ended with where they focused down onto where their drug creating facilities were at, but still needed confirmation. “They’re pretty difficult to get to without knowing where they are,” Creati admitted, handing him a GPS. “You’ll need this.” He would be the first to start evidence gathering; after all, his old classmates would begin tomorrow.

So he had left, going to the first hideout and finding out it was completely empty. Not a single spec of evidence remaining, not a secret door or trap to get him to where they could be hiding from sight.

So was the next.

And the next.

And the next.

Something sat weirdly in his stomach as he began walking towards the final one on his list, and he froze when he saw lights shifting and moving from around the building. Quickly, Shinsou hopped to higher grounds, his phone already out, ready to take pictures. He lay low to the rooftop, practically army crawling to get to place to place as he neared the windows on the rooftop, allowing him to peer in onto the building he was scouting to find precisely what he needed. 

The entire building was a drug production spot.

His eyes scanned the building floor, singling out ten of the twelve main heads on the cartel, and he smirked. Perfect.

“Whatcha doing here, Mindjack-sensei?” your voice whispered millimeters from his ear, and Shinsou bit his tongue harshly to keep the instinctual scream from ruining his covert operation.

He snapped his head over to you, eyes slightly furious, eyebrows knitted tightly as he looked to see you leaning toward him. You were in a different outfit today, completely black, drowning you out in the night. He blinked; even the capturing weapon he had still been unsuccessful in stealing back from you was pitch black.

“What’re you wearing?”

“Do you like it?” you asked, straightening up and twirling for him as if you were wearing a magnificent dress and not personally created ‘hero’ clothes. “Ah, I hoped you would! Sorry, I had to get rid of the purple. I just felt it made me look too cute, right? I know I can’t have villains falling for me like you had me falling for you!”

Shinsou did not blush, no he didn’t, “shut up.”

“So what are we looking for today?” you asked, pressing down onto the floor beside him. Your arm touching his as pressed your face towards the glass. “Is this a stakeout?”

“Less stakeout, more information gathering,” Shinsou grumbled, typing some needed notes onto a file on his phone. It seemed to him that there was plenty here for the drug making charges. “We’re trying to get their bigger names caught in the action.”

“Oh, I thought heroes just burst in whenever they wanted, that’s what they do in the movies. Plus, you always threaten me with being arrested with no evidence,” you giggle, shifting closer to the glass, smile wide on your face.

“After saying that, say goodbye to me signing off that paper of yours,” he grunted, slipping his phone back into his pocket while you scrunch your nose at him. Shinsou couldn’t help but stare at you as the palms of your hands supported your chin as you hummed some song he couldn’t recognize.

“Ne, Mindjack-sensei, did you get the big boss?” you asked, your finger pressed against the cold glass, and Shinsou frowned, returning his head to the glass.

Right where you were pointing was, in fact, the head of the cartel. He was horrendously scrawny, holding no sense of fear or malice, and Shinsou wondered what his quirk could be that he was in charge of an operation such as this one.

“Oh, his right-hand man came too! All twelve are here!” you cheered quietly as Shinsou took documentation on his phone, and that suspicious rock in his stomach finally made sense at this second.

“Y/l/n?” he asked, head turning toward yours, tired eyes glinting with emotions he didn’t know how to handle.

“Mhm?”

“How did you know there were twelve main members, and how’d they look like?”

Silence.

Shinsou’s lips pulled back into a snarl, his canines glinting as he locked eyes with yours that were wide with shock and disbelief.

“How’d you find me—?”

He watched you lean away from the glass, fingers shooting to your earpieces. And with the inkling of suspicion sprinting through his veins, the purple-haired hero still found that he moved too slow. 

BOOM!!!!

He blacked out when his body flew with the explosion.

...

..

.

Ringing.

Pain.

Numbness.

Shinsou could only hear ringing in his ears as soot and ashes fell down from the sky, falling on his body, coating his gaping, open mouth as he tried to breathe, trying to calm himself. Was he bleeding? Was he dying? Where was the explosion from? Were you okay?

His eyes blinked heavily, altogether so irregularly that Shinsou couldn’t help but feel he was out of his body when you reappeared in his sight. Your hand pressing to his cheeks sympathetically, eyes truly hurt as you shook your head, hand grabbing into his bloodied pocket to take his phone.

“I’m sorry,” your voice seemingly whispered, just loud enough for him to hear you through the ringing from the explosion. “You weren’t supposed to be here, Mindjack… these are the scumbags that hurt my friends and family. I couldn’t let them live. Plus… I didn't have a choice, they were competition.”

He spluttered, the warm goo of blood and saliva choking out of his mouth as he convulsed on the ground, his eyes watching as you went.

“See you later, hero.”

He tried to yell at you to come back, that you were a coward, a fucking menace that he would destroy the next time he saw you, but his voice failed to work. Nothing was working except his pain receptors, his heart that kept shoving blood into his lungs that he kept spitting up, but he saw flashing white and red lights as unconsciousness sank its jagged teeth into his neck.

An ambulance was here.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

It took four months to recover from the accident.

His hearing had been fucked up. Not even medical quirks had managed to save his hearing entirely. But hey, it did get him the chance for Bakugou Katsuki to come to his room, called him pathetic, and showed off his own hearing aid that he had needed since his quirk had damaged his own hearing. Not to mention that for the past four months, he had been teaching him sign language just in case.

He wasn’t alone, it seemed.

But it was four months, and he had recovered fully.

The hearing aid he required in his left ear still made his ear ache in pain, and he found that he liked it much better shoved in the back of a draw than anything else. But he knew it was dangerous to be a hero without his full hearing. If it hadn’t been for Bakugou’s trial through this all and the help of Hatsume Mei to create a more appropriate hearing aid for heroes, he wasn’t sure if he would still be here — working that is.

But today — or well, night — was a new day, and he was going to push ahead. He could do this, no sweat, no problem. 

Well, that was until an all too familiar figure sat perched on a ledge on his usual route, legs swaying in the air as uncontrolled rage bubbled in his chest. It wasn’t entirely your fault, but a large part of Shinsou was embarrassed to have been caught up in all of this because of you. He had trusted you above all else even when his instincts yelled at him not to because he knew what it was like to be painted as a villain, and he had hoped by letting you in more, you would have changed. He thought you had.

But you hadn’t.

Not one bit.

…

…

You sat at the edge of the building, already having heard the loud crunch of Shinsou’s shoes against the gravel rooftop, but you didn’t turn around. You didn’t know how to face him, how to tell him that you were both sorry that he got caught up in your schemes, but that you weren’t sorry for what you had done. Those bastards had it coming.

“Give me one good reason not to push you off the building,” Shinsou growled, probably much louder than he intended. 

Instead of answering, you shrugged.

You hadn’t brought the earbuds that would keep you from being immune to his quirk, and you slightly feared what would happen if you gave in to the whispers of his words. Would you blackout in a daze before coming back to normal only when placed in the prefectures jail? Would he actually attempt to kill you? You had no idea.

But you turned on the ledge, looking at his tired purple eyes that shook with his anger and betrayal. You had done a number on him.

“So, now you can’t seem to respond back to me?” he laughed bitterly, his teeth bared into a way too fierce smile, one that made your heart thump and sent a shiver down your spine. “What game do you think you’re playing?”

You still didn’t answer as you planted your feet back onto the rooftop and stood up, watching as his binds flared to life. Dancing and weaving around him in a dangerous coil of fabric, like a frilled dragon lion lizard extending its skin in a warning.

“Should’ve taken you down with that first time I found you,” he spat, his eyes narrowing as you took steps toward him, and the weapon seemed to snap at you. “Did your sister pull the same bullshit on him as you did me? Is that why he became ‘psycho?’”

Now that one nearly got the response out of you as fury thrummed through your veins as you were suddenly nose to nose. You couldn’t help it, but you knew there was no point in explaining your reasoning for doing what you did because he would never understand; he couldn’t. 

So as his eyes flashed dangerously from your eyes, his breathing coming down harshly against your upper lip, the hatred he had for you (that was probably reignited from a year ago and make it double) simmered between the air between you and him. You couldn’t resist.

Your lips pressed against his in a simmering hot kiss. 

Shinsou shoved you away, as quickly as you had pressed your mouth against his, but you were back on him before he could utter a word. Only that this time, he kissed you back with scalding, burning heat. 

You never really knew how much smaller you were to Shinsou until you were on the tips of your toes to kiss him, his hands practically burning you as they gripped onto your hips, pulling you so close there was hardly any room to breathe. His kiss was hateful, spiteful, and full of unspoken passion the two of you had never addressed during the period that was good. It had been so good, but he was a hero, he would never understand.

His teeth bit harshly onto your lower lip, and you hissed, your fingers burying into his hair and tugging at the root of his hair as his tongue came and pressed dangerously against yours. His tongue was hot against yours, he was undoubtedly much more hotblooded than you were, and with his emotions heightened, he exhausted what. 

Tongues clashed against one another, but it wasn’t even a battle of dominance; it was a battle to find who surrendered. There was to be no joy or excitement for whichever tongue prevailed, just the burning of the tears falling down your face and the acid taste on your tongue as he suckled on your pink muscle.

Your eyes were partially opened, watching his angry yet blank purple eyes meet yours, neither one of you allowing yourself to give in to the pure elation and sensation this was bringing. No, he wouldn’t allow it, and you wouldn’t have it.

The stubble of his beard scratched into your skin repetitively, feeling like sandpaper against your own skin as the kiss deepened, consuming the both of you on a whole new level as your crotches ground roughly against one another. Hisses and groans couldn’t stop pouring from your collective mouths, both of you hating yet craving more from this all. You couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if he spoke to you like this, would he do something to you while you were like this? So when his massive, thick hand made contact with the underneath of your ass, scooping up your leg so that your covered cunt could now correctly grind into his hard cock, the weapon you stole from him a year ago bound around his neck, choking him, collaring him.

“I like my bitches chained up,” you mocked against his lips, but somehow, someway, Shinsou liked it. 

You groaned loudly at the way Shinsou gasped for air against the makeshift collar, your grin widening as you nodded your head, pulling away from his mouth as the grin became a smirk. “Didn’t think you wanted to talk when we were fucking?” you lied, teeth biting onto his lower lip and sucking on it as your hips oh so artfully bucked against his covered cock. You could feel the growing slick in your panties beginning to feel uncomfortable with the lack of proper friction, and your head lolled backward when he slammed your core against his, devilishly grinding against you.

He picked up your other leg and dropped the both of you to the floor, the uncomfortable gravel stone floor digging painfully into your back, but you could care less. Shinsou’s mouth was already back on your body, scratchy, scraping kisses placed on your neck, making you moan out, legs wrapping around his waist as you cant your hips upward to grind into him.

Unamused with the lack of his hands on your body, you took his arms that were planted at your shoulders and pressed his heavy palms on your breasts, avoiding the pissed look in his eyes as his teeth marked you painfully. You actually shrieked in pain. The feeling of his teeth tearing through the skin on your neck, while his finger kneaded and pulled at your covered breasts. It was unashamedly painful with how he played with your breasts. He seemed to grow happier with every sound of distress you made.

Fisting your hands back into his hair, you pulled him back to your face level, your eyes fluttered at the way his clothed erection carded perfectly between your sopping wet cunt. Blood stained his mouth, making his teeth slightly orange in tint, and you clicked your teeth in partial anger and pain as your neck throbbed. Slamming your lips back against his, you almost gagged at the taste of iron that soared through your senses as his tongue wasted no time to seek yours out. His lips and fingers were so ardent, manipulating your every body movement, cry of pain and pleasure as thrumming hatred for the stupid, stubborn hero above you still coursed through your veins. 

Sweat began to form at your temples as your lips gilded against his, your hips snapping up to meet his grinding hips, and an airy response keened from his mouth as you moaned loudly.

His incessantly grinding hips were making your legs shake with stimulation, your whines and whimpers for more opening like a flood gate as you finally stuck a hand between the two of you and shoved his pants to his knees. You dropped your legs from around his waist, and he assisted you in ripping your pants off from one side of your body, the fabric still clinging to your right leg, but you could hardly care. All you wanted was for him to plant his cock into your blazing heat and to fuck you, to claim you here on this rooftop that started and would end it all. You wanted him, his cock, and him.

“Fuck me,” you begged into his ear, and his back shivered with your words. You hooked your leg around his waist, carding his hot, throbbing cock against your soaked pussy, as you rolled your hips. “I want you to fuck me, fill me with his cock, and cum deep within me to show me just how much you fucking hate me.”

You cried out when his hand shot down to his cock to line it up with your squeezing, dripping hole, his mouth once again covering yours, kissing you aggressively, fueled with an emotion you could taste as bitter hatred. Your legs trembled as the tip of his cock continued to press against your entrance, not entirely entering it, not giving you friction to send you into a euphoric end. You could help the snarl that passed through your lips, your eyes angry beyond repair as the head of his cock continued to deny you. Whenever you tried to grind down, to force your walls around his cock, he went down with you, he wouldn’t allow it, and your cunt clenched against nothing as he gave you nothing.

Shinsou wheezes out a bitter chuckle, his hand raising his cock from between your soaked folds to slap his heavy, thick, and long length against your throbbing clit.

Hatred and desire soak your body, and you needily rub your clit against his cock, your hands shoving up his shirt to feel the scarred pattern of his back as you give him new ones that were produced by your nails.

“Don’t tease me, hero,” you snapped, fingers tearing into his skin to draw blood. “You fuck my pussy so good, right now, or I promise next time you’ll go out with that bomb too.”

That seems to do what you want because before those words settle on your nerves. His cock penetrates deeply within you, bottoming out entirely as your head thrashes back against the gravel of the floor, throbbing pain from that entirely ignorable because fuck, his cock was stretching you out. He was so thick, so fucking veiny that you could feel the pulsating veins on his cock pressing against your puffy, sensitive walls. You scream his name as the pleasure-filled pain pulses within you, your hips thrashing, wildly bucking in your attempt to calm from the sudden placement of his cock.

“Why are you so fucking big?” you splutter, a whining pitch to your voice as you clawed at his back, trying to separate your joined bodies but also trying to get even closer. “It’s so big, my walls feel like! Oh fuck, Shinsou, it feels like Imma split in two!”

It seems that Shinsou holds some great pride over those worse, because he growled deep in his chest, and his hips begin to fuck into you. It sends your hands to the base of his neck, clutching onto his skin with hope as you scream in pleasure, eyes rolling to the back of your head as the wet squelches fill the air and tickle your ears. The head of his cock keeps dragging against your spongy wall, brushing over your g-spot over and over again as if he knew where it was, as if it was common knowledge as he fucked you further into the gravel floor. It didn’t even hurt anymore, your skin singing with joy as his cock fucked you stupid.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck me!” you whined, and Shiinsou made an approving noise. 

He grunts as your cunt flutters and clenches around him, his balls hitting your skin in possibly bruising force and speed. And his pelvis crashing against your stings ever so slightly, but has you begging for more, sobbing for more.

Your vulgar words and moans are unstoppable at this point, your legs and thighs trembling as they are still circled around him, sometimes assisting you in coming up to meet his driving, drilling hips. You whine into his ear, your mouth pressing blind and sloppy kisses against his slick with sweat neck.

It’s when both his hands bring your hips up to him, his cock finally bottoming out entirely within you, does the most primal moan rip through your mouth. You convulse underneath him, trying to move as the head of his cock buries against your cervix, poking your womb with power and speed that has you swearing behind the blackness of your vision that this sensation brings. You can see the entire galaxy, the world lighting up when his cock leaves the thin wall, and you gasp, shocked that the heat and slick of your cunt is still going. You tremble underneath him, wordless cries pittering from your mouth while he bites on your earlobe.

You soon readjust to the numbing pleasure, the bruising pleasure, and pain that comes with his cock slamming against your cervix. The way that he thrusts up into you, stretching out your walls far more than you were ever used to.

 A pathetic cry escaped your lips when he rolled over so that you were now on top, your body bouncing as soon as it could against him. You keened and whined, feeling the top of his cock licking your cervix, and you spluttered.

“Fuck this angle, this angle and your cock!?” you stammered, fists curling into his collar as you rode him, his hips snapping up into yours with that same animalistic power and speed.

His pace is irreplicable, near maddening with every successive thrust of his hips. Each snap, each wet noise sends you close to the edge, your inner walls clenching and milking his length with greater power as your senseless cries fill the night sky. His grip on your waist will leave purple bruises later tonight, you just know it, but the fire in his eyes as you lock fazes is enough for you to be okay with it.

Its intensifying, deepening, fire erupting in your core as your cunt throbs.

Sweat, tears, and spit fall from your face, and Shinsou surges upward, kissing you with everything he can. It's a maddening escape of lust and need and hatred being exchanged, saliva spreading between you, covering your hot faces with slimy coldness, But you keep him close, your mouth drinking him in more, begging for more as your tongue sinks into his mouth.

His fingers rake down from your back. Past the curve of your clapping ass and onto your powerful thighs that helped in your action to claim his cock. Your joined mouths, both parted in silent screams, wordless begs for more, branding curses that spoke of his hatred for you, your hatred of his job.

Fuck this, fuck that, fuck, fuck, “fuck!”

You held each other impossibly close. Despite the barriers of shirts and armor separating your chests, you swore you could feel his hammering heart flush against your chest. A steady, consistent beat reminding you that this was a one-time thing, that this was yet another bomb with only one explosion to it.

“S-Shit!” his voice finally managed to escape from the makeshift collar, and you nearly sobbed at the sound of his gravelly, husky voice. 

You still hated him, you really hated him and his stupid deep voice. 

Your back arches as the control you had on collar suddenly slacks, as if you had never had it there, and his own noises of sex, of hatred, of pleasure fill and echo in your ear. You can hear him mumbling something in your ear, your head pathetically nodding, tears streaming down your face only you can’t seem to figure out why. The throbbing pressure in your stomach made you near uncomfortable as his cock sank and disappeared from your cunt, your walls' vice grip becoming tighter and tighter and tighter.

There’s vigor, untapped lust, pent up frustration as he rolls you both around, pushing you back into the gravel and dives his length into your wet, loud cunt without mercy. You were overworked, over thrilled, the pressure of your coming orgasm snapping into your every fiber of your being, your toes curling, and drool seeping from your lips as he growled. 

The noise seemed to resonate deeply in your own chest, and he pressed his sweaty forehead against yours, pathetic, needy noises escaping your lips as you stared into his angry, lusting eyes. And as he buried his teeth into your bottom lip, his nose scrunched in an aggressive snarl, he spoke with finality:

“Cum.”

You weren’t sure if you had suddenly fallen under the persuasion of his brainwash, or he just knew you were overfilled with pressure, but you went rigid in his hold, your eyes rolling backward, and your vision going white. You came in powerful waves, electric stimming vibrating through your entire body as your spongey, wet walls clamped around him, and Shinsou came in a guttural groan. His hips snapping into your with five last, robust, resounding thrusts until your trembling abdomen and thighs were stilled with his crushing weight.

 You could feel his hot cum pulsing and thriving deep within your cunt, and you panted heavily, your body feeling alarmingly weak as the both of you lay there. A puddle of cum, tears, drool, pain, longing, and hatred.

He lays on top of you, his chest heaving with his breathing, and you felt frozen beneath him. The pain of the gravel roof no longer adds to your pleasure but rather is stabbing you in pain. It’s quiet as you lay there.

He’s quiet.

You’re silent.

“Why’d you do it?” he asked suddenly, interrupting the silence that you hated.

“I can’t tell you,” you admit, voice thick and heavy with untold emotions.

“You know I’ll have to arrest you, right?” Shinsou spoke softly, but he didn’t move to capture you, and you didn’t move to run.

What was the point? It wasn’t as if there was ever a fighting chance for the both of you. The world would have never allowed it, so why bother?

“I don’t think you hate me enough to arrest me right now, sleep on it,” you softly chided, your eyes staring up into the universe, begging to know why they made you a freak?

“Not right now, you spent all my energy,” Shinsou admits, rising up from you, his soft cock removing itself from your humming core, and you looked away to keep from staring. “I really hate you though, y/l/n. I don’t like liars or pretenders.”

“Convince your cock of it next time,” you couldn’t help but fire back, your upper lip curling in your anger and hatred at the sound of his zipping pants.

Silence and a beat follow your words.

“I’ll tell you this now,” Shinsou spoke, turning on his heels, his tone was cold, distant, like a stranger who could care less for you. “Don’t let me see you again. If I do, I promise you, I’ll send your ass to Tartarus. We’re no longer on good terms.”

Anger, hatred, and fury course through your veins as you stand up, legs weak, but spirit wounded as you pull up your pants, uncaring of his cum leaking from your slit. 

“Don’t you dare show your face to me again! Next time I won’t save your fucking ass when I blow something up!” you snapped, the tears running down your face uncontrollable although your voice never gave it away. It didn’t have to though, he turned around one last time, and his eyes met yours, and the two of you glared and simmered. 

But, he didn’t bother to respond back as he disappeared into the shadows of the night sky.

You collapsed onto your knees, exhaustion finally catching up with you, and you realized his capturing weapon you had stolen was finally taken back by the rightful owner. You fell forward, the tears and silent sobs muffled by your bitten lip as you stayed on that rooftop for an hour. Crying like a freak.

Truth be told, you weren’t even sure if you ever hated him.

...

..

.

Incoming Text…

Incoming Text…

New Text Message Received!

From Unknown:      ↳ Good job, y/n. Phase one is complete.

[sir-subpar]

Fangs And Fur (Bf x Pico oneshot)

Werewolf Au. Because I want to. This was somewhat inspired by an animated short called "Dirty Paws"

*Warning: Swearing and Blood/Gore/Violence. (It's not that bad, but just in case)

Bf and Pico shared jokes and friendly banter as Pico walked Boyfriend home. It was dusk, just barely any sunlight illuminating the neighborhood. The two of them had just finished a dinner date, still laughing and flirting as they walked along the sidewalk on Bf's home street. Some of Boyfriend's neighbors were greeting the boys from their yards as the two passed by. 

Carol, whose house was directly to the left of Boyfriend's, was finishing up watering her yard when she saw her neighbor and his date. "Hey Boyfriend!" Carol greeted them happily. "Hi Carol! How are you?" Boyfriend replied, he and Pico stopping in front of her new painted fence to talk. "I'm good, just relaxing after putting in this darn fence. It took forever, but it's worth it though to keep my little Cocoa Puff safe." Carol gestured to her mini poodle, the little fuzzball had brown curly fur, hence the name Cocoa Puff. "You should probably get a fence too, Bf. There's been a lot more animal attacks happening lately." Carol warned, Bf and Pico shifted with unease. "Yeesh, has it been getting that bad?" The bluette asked nervously. "It's been really bad, Sunday's cat got attacked the other night. Poor little guy was really chewed up by some big animal.." "Oh no! Not Bubsy!" Bf had a soft spot for animals in general, even though he didn't have any pets of his own, he always loved animals. Pico, too, felt bad for the little cat. "Did the cat survive? How bad was it?" Pico asked, never having met Sunday or her cat Bubsy, Bf told him about them before. Sometimes Sunday would ask Bf to babysit her cat when she was on tour, he was really good with Bubsy. Carol gave a look of sympathy, knowing the cat's condition. "He's alive, but it's a long road to recovery." She said dejectedly. "I've been hearing that people are setting traps around here, so keep an eye out for those too. Okay?" "Will do, thanks Carol." Bf replied, Pico only nodded in response. "Anyway, moving on to lighter news.. Are you going to introduce me to your friend here?" Carol lightly teased, tilting her head in Pico's direction. "Oh yeah! Right. Carol, this is Pico!" Bf wrapped his arm around the redheaded man's shoulders, making Pico's face turn pink. A look of recognition flashed onto Carol's features. "Ooooh, so THIS is the boyfriend you're always talking about. It's nice to finally meet you Pico." Carol teased, holding out her hand. Pico felt his cheeks flush with embarrassment before shaking Carol's hand. It was flattering to know that Boyfriend talked about him. "Y-yeah. You too." 

Carol giggled a bit. "Alright, well I'll let you guys enjoy your evening. Have a good one!" Bf waved at her while he and Pico walked up to his porch. Bf held the door open for Pico, but he declined going inside. Bf of course took notice of this, as well as Pico's nervous demeanor.

 "Are you okay, Pico?" 

"Yeah.. I just- I should head home. I had a nice night. Let's go out again soon." Pico gave him a smile that was somewhat forced. "Oh… okay. Well, I'll call you tomorrow then." 

"Yeah, sounds good." Pico gave Bf a kiss on the cheek, then he left. Bf closed his door, he was a little disappointed, if he was honest. He had hoped Pico would stay the night, but it was Pico's choice. It wouldn't have been right to stop him. Bf just decided to chill instead. Sweets and videogames were the perfect cure for disappointment. 

…

Pico rushed home, the sun had already gone down, he didn't have much time. He felt bad. Not just for leaving an obviously dejected Boyfriend, but for being so secretive with him. But he didn't have time for that! He needed to get home and lock up. It was only a matter of time before the moon would show it's Damn face. He dashed down the street , finally getting to the cul de sac he lived on. He ran onto his porch, swinging open his door and slamming it behind him. Just in the nick of time. He collapsed on the floor. His transformation was already taking place. His breathing was heavy, he couldn't help but shout in agony as his body reconfigured itself into its new form. Before he was lost to the lycan curse, however, he had one last horrifying realization. 

He forgot to close the window.

…

It had been a couple of hours, Bf had changed into some comfy clothes and was watching tv on his couch. He couldn't help but think of Pico. It was weird how nervous he suddenly was. Pico had been fine all day, but suddenly he ran off after talking to Carol. Was he really that flustered? It didn't seem like it was a big deal. Surely it was something else, but what? Bf sighed, it wasn't really his business, but he wanted to know what was up. He decided to text Pico. 

Bf: Hey. I had a lot of fun at dinner :) I just wanna see if you're alright, you seemed off earlier. Everything ok?

Thirty minutes went by, and he got no response. 'Maybe he's already asleep?' Boyfriend thought, sure it wasn't super late, but it wasn't unusual for people to sleep at this hour. Boyfriend shut off the tv. Maybe he should just get some air. It was nice out. A nice warm summer night. A walk would do him some good. Sure he was basically in pajamas, with a mismatched t-shirt and sweatpants but who cares? He put his phone and keys in his pockets, and left the house for a walk. His neighborhood was fairly close to a nice wooded area. It wasn't really a forest, but there were wild animals around. Like coyotes and rabbits. He decided to hang out around the trees. He sat down on a stump that had once been a huge cottonwood tree, and he just listened to the noises around him. Crickets and other bugs were chirping and buzzing around. It was oddly serene.At least, it was. Until some rustling in the bushes caught his attention. 

He was startled, frightened even, but then he felt relieved once he realized it was a rabbit. Just a little rabbit. But his levity was short lived when noticed the rabbit was limping. He used his phone's flashlight to get a better look. The poor rabbit was barely able to move, its flesh had been ripped apart, blood soaking its fur, and one of its legs was missing. It trembled and struggled. Boyfriend's heart sank when the realization set in that the poor thing wasn't going to make it. It was suffering, and he hated to see animals suffer. He decided to try and comfort it. The rabbit collapsed, he gently brushed his fingers on its soft little head. The rabbit's breathing was still panicked, but it was too weak to do anything. He considered killing it to end its misery, but before he could, he heard snarling coming from the bush. He quickly shined the light on it, just in time to see the snout of a larger animal swiftly bite the rabbit. 

Bf jumped back in fear. The animal stalked out of the bushes that had hidden it, revealing a large orangish red wolf.  The rabbit, the wolf's prey, was still in its jaws. The small rodent fell limb as the wolf's fangs sunk into its body. Bf could hear the bones crack. It didn't take long for the wolf to completely devour the rodent. Bf froze. Should he run? Would the wolf want him? He couldn't help but tremble at the large beast before him. Then it looked at him. Its eye bore into his soul. Focused. It watched him intently. Bf stayed still. Maybe if he didn't make any sudden movements, it would move on. It approached him slowly, circling him. It then got closer, inspecting him with its nose. It seemed particularly drawn to his pocket. Bf slowly reached into his pocket, the wolf allowed it, watching him. Bf pulled out a small bag of chocolate chip cookies. He had forgotten that he put those there. The wolf's ears perked up a bit, and it tilted it's head. 

"Is this what you want?" The Wolf kept its eyes locked on the bag. "I'm not sure if you should have this, it has chocolate in it. Pretty sure dogs can't have that." The wolf growled, seeming to not take "no" as an answer. "Okay okay! Fine! They're yours!" Bf reached into the bag, then tossed a cookie at the wolf. The treat hit its nose before falling on the ground. The wolf appeared displeased with the assault on its nose, giving a huff before eating the cookie. "Well sorry, it's not my fault you're clumsy and didn't catch it." Bf said sarcastically. The wolf looked at him again, it wanted more treats. Bf tossed another cookie, this time aiming in front of the wolf so he didn't hit its nose again. The beast seemed content with that. So Bf kept doing it until he ran out. 

The canine's demeanor had thankfully shifted, it seemed more docile after being fed. Boyfriend had calmed down significantly, no longer fearing for his life. "Well, it was nice to meet you… wolf. I'm gonna go home. I've had enough excitement today." Bf turned away from the orange/red animal, trusting that it wouldn't pounce on him while his back was turned. As he walked away, he could hear two pairs of footsteps behind him. He looked back to confirm that the wolf was following him. When he stopped, the wolf halted, when he moved, the wolf followed. "I uh, think you should stay here. Where you live. I'm going home." Bf tried again to leave, the wolf followed him anyway. "No. You stay. I go." Bf tries using hand gestures to get the animal to listen, but to no avail. Bf picked up a stick and threw it. It didn't seem to interest the wolf, but the stick accidentally hit some small animal Bf hadn't noticed before. That got the wolf's attention. As the large mammal attacked the unfortunate stick receiver, Bf took the opportunity to run home. He managed to make it to his house and close the door. Bf leaned against the wood, sliding down till he hit the carpet. He let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. After he had calmed down, astonishment took over. He just fed a wolf. And he didn't die! He was like Snow White! Holy crap!

Bf eventually stood up and moved to the couch. Deciding that maybe he should relax for a bit. He started channel surfing on his TV, settling on a random cartoon that was on. He could feel his tense muscles relaxing a bit. He let out a sigh of relief. 

…

He had gotten through a few episodes when he heard something. Something outside.

*SCRATCH SCRATCH*

He muted the tv. No way. There's no way this was happening.

*SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH*

It followed him home. 

He could hear the clawing getting faster. Impatient. Instead of following common sense, he decided to open the door. His motion triggered porch light shone on the wolf's red/orange fur. It's white eyes bore into his soul again. Bf stepped aside, allowing the beast into his house. The wolf strutted in, immediately smelling anything and everything it could. It didn't seem aggressive, just curious. Bf filled a bowl with water and set it on the floor. Might as well hydrate his new houseguest. Eventually his fears dissipated. He went back to the couch, watching the wolf as it wandered around his living room. He watched the tv again, laying down across the sofa comfortably. 

And, before he could prepare for it, he was suddenly smothered by orange fur. The wolf had kept onto the sofa, laying on top of the blue haired man. He tried to push the wild dog off of him, but he couldn't budge it. This was his life now. He was a man-sized dog's couch cushion now. He didn't know wolves could get this big now that he thought about it. But it didn't matter. He was stuck. This was the predicament he was in. He gave up. The dog had won. Despite the animal's weight, he managed to fall asleep. It was warm and fluffy, so it wasn't so bad.

…

The rising sun peeked through the blinds, illuminating Bf's face, waking him up. He shifted a little, still feeling the warm mass on top of him. He yawned, his eyes still closed. He petted the wolf on top of him, his fingers gently brushing its soft skin- wait a second. His eyes shot open. 

"Pico!?" 

The man jolted awake after hearing his name. Pico looked at Bf with wide eyes. His face turned almost as red as Bf's signature hat. The two stared in silence for what felt like forever before Boyfriend broke it.

"You owe me an explanation."

"Can I borrow some clothes first?"

"Please do."

[icantthinkofanythingcool3]

Hii I saw ur post about short blurbs and was wondering if you could do 5 or 13 🤍🤍

Well this did not end up being short 🤦‍♀️ but here ya go! Hope you enjoy!💜

It had been 2 years since y/n had moved away from Beacon Hills and half of her friends. Kira and y/n had ended up at the same college and in the same dorm. Lydia and Stiles both ended up about a half hour from them in different directions. The group was still close, but things were definitely different for all of them. Kira and Scott had grown apart and Scott and Malia had grown closer. Lydia and y/n had grown closer than before, they were always going back and forth on the weekends visiting with each other. Although y/n and Stiles were really close before, things had simmered down right before they left for school two years ago.

All their friends had sworn that the two were going to be together, even with college coming up. They were going to school close enough where they could totally still pursue a relationship. Somewhere though, Stiles and y/n had ‘grown apart’. At least that’s what their friends thought. In reality, neither of them really knew what had happened. It was like one moment they were falling for each other and the next it was just gone. Y/n and Stiles had both tried on different occasions to talk to each other, but something always got in the way.

Y/n walked into her apartment, that Kira was decorating...for Valentine's Day. “UGHHHHHH. Kira I thought we decided not to make a big deal out of this stupid holiday.”

“No...you decided that. Just because you’re still stuck on Stiles, doesn’t mean everyone else can’t be happy about love.” Kira announced.

“That’s not-no you’re. Ugh, whatever.” y/n replied, not having a come back, because what she had said was true.

y/n was still really hung up on Stiles, she was still so confused about what had happened to them back in Beacon Hills. There had been plenty of times since then that Lydia, Kira, y/n and Stiles had gotten together to hang out, even times when Scott and the others had come down to visit. However, their interactions were always strange and confusing. She hadn’t been able to date anyone else, and was honestly just making herself super unhappy.

“Before you make yourself too depressed, this was slipped under the door for you today.” Kira handed her a note, folded up with a huge heart on one side and y/n on the other.

“What...what is this?”

“I don’t know silly, clearly I haven’t opened it...since it’s for you…”

Y/n’s eyes rolled as the note was opened. It was typed and it read:

"When love is not madness it is not love." –Pedro Calderon de la Barca.

I have felt nothing but madness from the moment I laid eyes on you.

As she read it to Kira, she let out a screech, “y/n!!!!! Omg you totally have a secret admirer! This is so EXCITING!”

However y/n was doubtful, she left Kira to go to her room. Who on Earth could have sent this to her? Was it a joke? Was it real? The next day, nothing appeared under the door and it disappointed y/n, even though they would never admit that, especially to Kira!

The next day however, when y/n got home from work Kira was waiting impatiently by the door with a note in her hands. It looked exactly like the other one. She basically threw it in my face and stood over my shoulder as she repeated ‘open it, open it, open it’ in my ear.

This one read:

“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard. This, I can assure you, is true. I make dumb mistakes every time I’m around you.

“I literally have no idea who could be doing this. I don’t talk to anyone, no one even notices me around here!” y/n exclaimed, confused.

“Well, you must be wrong, because someone is DEFINITELY noticing you!!!!”

“No, this is just wrong. This has got to be a joke or something. I’m telling you. Throw away any other ones, I’m serious.” With that, y/n walked into her room and slammed the door, she was done with this.

The next day was normal, but y/n wasn’t hopeful that she wouldn’t get another letter, and the next day, the 5th of February, Kira was waiting again with another note.

“You are my heart, my life, my one and only thought.” – Conan Doyle. You are the only thing I can think about lately, you’re in my every thought.

y/n didn’t know what to think anymore. Was this person a freaking psycho stalker? How did they know where I lived? We’re they stalking me?

“Kira, I know that you’re sitting here thinking this is some romantic love story...but what if this is some crazy stalker that now knows where we live? Like what if they break in and kill us in the middle of the night?”

“y/n I think you’re being a little dramatic. I feel like this is someone that has to know you in some way. This is some intense shit.”

“We’re gonna die...watch.” y/n finished, over the anxiety this was causing her.

Two days later, y/n didn’t have class. She was going back and forth from the front door, to her room. She was stuck between being excited and worried. Half of her believed that this was some kind of cruel joke, the other half thought maybe someone actually did like her. By 4 o’clock, she thought maybe that it was over, but as she made her way out of there room, there was a note by the door.

"Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back." - Plato. This one may be corny, but it’s true, I feel this with you.

This definitely sounded like someone that knew her. But how could she be so oblivious? How could there be someone this into her and she had no idea. That’s why she still believed that this could be a joke. Like clockwork, two days later she got another note.

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss. I swear since I started these notes, I haven’t been able to sleep at all. I know this is probably starting to creep you out, I promise that you know me and I know you. I’m not a random person.

“I’m sure that this is supposed to make me feel better Kira, but I feel worse. How do I not know this person likes me, if they like me this much?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking from the beginning of this, do you think it could be Stiles?”

“WHAT?” y/n asked incredulously, “Come on, there’s no way. First of all, that would mean he would have to drive a half hour here and back every other day to slip these under the door? There’s no way, that would be crazy.”

“I mean, you guys definitely had something and then suddenly you guys just stopped. You’re still awkward around each other, maybe this is the only way he can get you back?”

“No. Seriously. Stop that’s, that’s. No, that's crazy.” But later that night, what Kira said had gotten the best of y/n. She did something she hadn’t done in a while, she called Stiles.

As soon as he answered, y/n regretted it, “y/n? Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“No, no nothing’s wrong. Sorry, I’m not even sure why I called…...I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for calling, you know.”

“Yeah, sorry- shit I mean okay. I-I gotta go talk to you later.” And she hung up, she felt so stupid why would she call him? Kira and these damn notes have gotten her head all twisted up. She should know better than to think Stiles could have done this, she was getting her hopes up just thinking about it.

Two days later, y/n could hardly think at work. Her mind was all in a swirl and she kept making mistakes and dropping shit, by the end of her shift she was exhausted. As she had expected, when she got home, Kira was sitting on the couch, holding a new note.

“Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” – Rumi. I haven’t known you forever, but when I met you it was like I had known you my whole life.

“There’s only three days left until Valentine's Day. What’s going to happen? Is this all leading up to something? Or are the notes just going to stop?”

“I guess that’s the fun part!” But when y/n looked at her pointedly she continued, “I know this is freaking you out and giving you anxiety, but this could be a good thing. Whoever it is, really cares about you. And I’m not getting creepy vibes from any of this, if someone was going to break in and kill us, I think they already would have.”

y/n knew that Kira was right, she shouldn’t be so freaked out about this. It didn’t seem like a creepy kind of thing, the notes were sweet and heartfelt, and they definitely, probably would have already been killed. So all y/n could do was wait.

As y/n made her way through the day before Valentine’s hazily, she could barely focus. She kept texting Kira, asking if she had found anything yet. Seeing as she was still in class, she had not. Y/n wanted nothing more than to leave her classes and go to the apartment, but she knew if the note wasn’t there yet, she would get even more impatient. So when Kira finally texted her that she got home and there was a note, y/n excused herself from her class and rushed home. Kira was waiting, almost as impatiently as y/n, with the note in her hand!

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu. Meet me at Hilton tomorrow, 7PM, there’ll be a note left at the front desk.

“What? Kira, am I really supposed to just go to this random hotel and meet this random person?”

“I mean they said you know them, so they’re not that random!”

“I know a lot of people! It could be the cute barista that gets my coffee everyday! I technically know him, but would I go into a random hotel room with him? NO.”

“Okay, then I drive you there, and you keep me on the phone. If anything funky happens I’ll run up and save your ass. I think you should go. I see the look in your eyes when you read the notes, you’re excited. I haven’t seen you genuinely excited in a long time.”

Kira had saved my life multiple times, I trusted her, and it was a good plan. I was excited, she was right, I was stupid for thinking that I would get it past her. And I wasn’t exactly defenseless, I had learned to fight through many years of fighting off the supernatural. I decided it couldn't hurt, if anything it would end up a good story to tell one day.

The next day was torture waiting for 7pm. Especially since y/n had no class and only finding an outfit to distract her. y/n called Lydia in the morning, while Lydia had been pissed that she’d only just heard about this, she insisted on y/n video chatting her to pick an outfit. Together, they had decided on a blush pink dress, with a small flower design. There was a belt that tied right under the chest, that accentuated the top of y/n’s body and flowed down nicely to a little above the knee. They picked out black kitten heels, which according to Lydia, y/n should have already had. It was 4:30 when she got home, already ready to start her makeup to keep her distracted. Kira helped her do her hair nicely and put on minimal makeup, to highlight her best features. By 6, y/n was ready to get in the car, but the drive was only 15 minutes. Kira tried to distract her with finding things to fix, like an out of place hair, or too much highlight. At 6:30, she couldn’t distract her anymore and they got in the car. She drove slowly, constantly trying to hit red lights. Although, y/n had noticed, she pretended not, too.

Freaking out at 6:50, y/n got out of the car by the entrance. Looking at Kira who gave her a thumbs up, y/n walked in and to the front desk.

“Hi, um, I was told there was a note going to be left for me here?”

“Ahh, you must be y/n, yes?” The desk attendant said to me, smiling brightly.

“Yes, that is me!” I said, nervously.

“Here is the note, don’t be so nervous. I think you’ll like what is waiting for you!”

She looked at the note that looked the same as all the other ones. The note said:

Go to hotel room #33.

y/n double checked that Kira was still on the phone and went up the elevator to the correct floor. She walked up to the door, but was hesitant to knock. It took her a full minute and many deep breaths to finally knock. When the door opened, she gasped at what she saw.

“Stiles?” She asked incredulously.

“Hi, y/n. I was nervous you weren’t going to come.”

y/n looked down at her phone to see that Kira had already hung up, “I-I, the notes were you the whole time?”

“Yes, I’m sorry, I didn’t know how else to do it. I was freaking out about the whole thing. I know things got messed up before and honestly, I don’t even know why. I didn’t want to mess up again, and I just thought this was the best way to get you to see that I was sorry.”

Y/n took a minute to look around the room. There were two queen beds, both covered in rose petals. There was a small, pink and red bag on one of them. There were actually rose petals everywhere. There were small candles lit all over the room, lights turned down. There was a bottle of champagne on ice and room service on a trolley that contained y/f/flowers in a beautiful vase. It was beautiful honestly, and clearly took a lot of thought.

“y/n?” Stiles started, as she had not said anything after his confession.

“I’m sorry, it’s- I mean this is beautiful. It’s amazing honestly. I can’t believe you did all of this.”

“I’ve loved you for a long time y/n. And I don’t know how exactly we got all fucked up, but I was nervous and scared about what would come to us when school started. I’ve wanted to tell you everyday since that whatever was going on was stupid and that we should be together, but I never could get it out and I’m sorry.” Stiles was nervous, not sure y/n felt the same.

“I don’t know what happened either, if I’m being honest..I felt the same. Scared and nervous. I’ve literally made myself miserable everyday, knowing that I should have done something about what happened. I love you. I’m sorry too, that I didn’t do anything to fix whatever happened. I knew from the moment I met you, that we were meant to be more than just friends.”

Stiles couldn’t hold back after he heard y/n’s confession, his feelings had been overwhelming for so long. He walked closer to her, placed his hand on her face gently, and placed his lips on hers. At first, it was sweet and slow, but y/n moved her hands to the back of his head, pulling him closer. When they both ran out of breath, they pulled away smiling at each other.

“Can I ask you a question?” y/n spoke first.

“Of course, anything.” Stiles answered.

“Why are there two beds?” y/n wiggled her eyebrows.

Stiles face turned red and his hand went to rub his chin, “I well, I mean I didn’t want to-uh...I didn’t want to assume anything, I just, I didn’t want to mess anything else.”

“Well I don’t think we’ll be needing it.” y/n said and pulled Stiles back to her, placing her lips on his again.

[skaylanphear]

Hi there! Do you have any advice on improving traction towards a fanwork/fic? I love writing—and it's not for notoriety by any means—but having validation and feedback also feels nice (I hope that's not conceited). What would you recommend to someone without a large audience/follower base? I do "advertise" on tumblr when my work is written/updated on AO3. How did your journey start? Thank you!

This is an interesting question and I doubt most people are going to like the answers, but here we go:

So, first and foremost, you need to be realistic about why you're creating in the first place. If you're doing work in a fandom that is older, where content has stopped coming out, or that is simply smaller, you're not going to get much engagement, period. There will, of course, be activity in these fandoms, but it will be far less and the people involved—while they may view your work—will be less likely to comment/spread it around simply because there's not much going on. So if you're creating in that sort of environment (which can be a really good environment if you're looking for something chill with no pressure), then you have to be prepared for low engagement, even if the people you do meet and who are willing to talk about your work are more regularly in your sphere. You can probably make better/closer friends in these sorts of fandoms, if you're willing to try.

But, on the other end of this, if you're coming into a huge fandom late, it's also going to be harder to wade through the massive following to get your stuff out there. For example, in both the Miraculous and Sk8 fandom, I started work pretty early on, when the shows were still gaining traction, and so my "name" as a creator gained traction parallel to that growth, as opposed to when I started writing in the Voltron fandom. With Voltron, I came in super late and so what few fics I had that did gain traction took a lot longer to get there because people already had their fav content creators in the fandom, etc. It's not impossible to get popular in this situation—far from it—but it does take longer.

You'll also benefit from having finished works early on in a fandom's lifespan, at least with writing. This is because there's less competition for views and so more people will be filtered to your work, initially. This means that you have a better chance of getting those comments and kudos. Having a finished work increases this engagement because people look for finished works before works in progress. Generally, the length of a fic doesn't matter much for popularity, so long as it's DONE. When I was writing in the ML fandom, quite a few of my earlier fics were shorter, and they compete in popularity with my longer fics, because people care more about having a finished story, not a long story. That's why when it came to Only Practice Makes Perfect in the Sk8 fandom, I worked hard to get that shit done, because it was the most popular story I had in the fandom and I decided—like an idiot—to make it a long fic. Which, yeah, means people probably love it/remember it more in the long run, but if I hadn't finished it in 2 to 3 months, I'd have lost considerable traction as far as making a name within the fandom.

This leads into one of the most important points, if not THE MOST IMPORTANT point in gaining an audience—consistency. If you do want to be a successful creator, you Have To Be Consistent. This is the most difficult hurdle for all creators, and it is oftentimes impossible to make happen. If you want to aim for professionalism, which a lot of fandom creators don't care about (which is fine), then consistency is how you get there. Nobody wants to read a fic or follow an artist who doesn't stick to creating what they start (RIP all my unfinished works and the people who left me as a result, LOL). Using my most recent works as an example, I very, very, very consistently updated Only Practice Makes Perfect multiple times a week. To the point where people got comfortable expecting it, which is the key variable here. When people become comfortable that you will regularly create content, they not only stick around, but will be more interactive with you and your work. Nobody likes the disappointment of getting involved with a work only for that work to rarely get updates. Most people don't have the attention span to care. I'll admit, if I read a fic that's not finished and the writer takes one week to update, then one week, then THREE weeks, I probably will, like, forget about it. That's just life.

The best thing you can do is schedule. And again, this is the HARDEST thing to do, because it holds the creator to a deadline. Most people who create in fandoms don't want that kind of pressure—and that's fine. I go back and forth on when I have scheduled releases and when I don't, depending on what I'm aiming to do. But if you to retain your audience, telling them that you will update a work regularly on such and such a day and such and such a time, it creates something for them to remember. If they're invested in your work, they will think, "oh, it's Friday, that means such and such is coming out with something new." But, with that in mind, you also have to commit to a schedule that people will remain invested in. Which basically means you can't put things out more than a week away from each other, unless you're really, really famous, lol. If I told people I was going to go on a two week update schedule, I would lose most of my audience. But a week is long enough for people to both still remember and anticipate. That's just how the scheduling of the world works. And if you're an artist that's working on a big project, then you have to share progress, or pieces of what you're doing on a regular basis. That's what generates "buzz" and keeps you relevant. And, yeah, that's a really hard schedule to commit to, because it's a lot of work. BUT this consistency is where you see people being successful. Popular youtubers may not have gained their popularity by being consistent, but most sure do retain it that way. And again, there are outlying exceptions, but they generally ARE exceptions.

Speaking of hard work, here's probably the second hardest thing to accomplish—you have to be prolific. Especially as a writer. You have to write A LOT if you want to gain an audience. And yeah, that means you have to work, a lot. I love my work, so I enjoy that "grind," and I also have developed a lot of strategies to work around writer's block and every other obstacle that tends to catch people up. I work in a very professional manner—I do outlines, and drafts, and plan. I do a lot of stuff that people who do this kind of thing for fun can't be bothered with (and that's fine), but that's because I find it to be what works best in creating an efficient environment. I'm also very, very NOT lazy, lol. I was raised in an environment where you have to work for everything that you want. My parents didn't buy me my first computer, or snowboard, or what have you. We were tight on money and if I wanted something, they couldn't help me—I had to get that shit on my own. And I also grew up on a farm, where hard work was a staple of how you did things. You did things the right way, even if it was the hard way. You can't cut corners and it's the same with this. If you want it, you have to actually do the work, that's it. Some people get lucky with popularity, most don't. Most famous actors didn't become well-known off their first efforts, they had to keep trying and keep working and then they have to continue to do that to stay relevant. So if that doesn't sound great to you, then you might want to not focus on your audience and just create because you enjoy it, lol. Sometimes that's what I do too, when I don't wanna deal with the pressure.

Moving on, here's another point that nobody is going to like. Simply put, you also have to be good at what you do. I think some people don't realize that I've been writing fic for over fifteen years. I currently have nearly 2 millions words worth of fics on AO3 and that doesn't include a majority of the stuff I've ever written. I practice A LOT. I write every day. And I'll tell ya, when I started out in middle school, my stuff was not good. But I worked hard, I ignored the hate, and I kept going. That is the only way you will ever get better at anything. There's no quick way to become a better writer, or artist. And a vast majority of people are only going to pay attention to your stuff if it's quality work. Getting to that point is a process, on top of then creating stuff that fits into popular molds. Not only am I good at what I do (and I don't care how arrogant that sounds—I've worked my ass off), but when it comes to fandoms, I rarely write "rare pairs" and "crack ships." Generally, if it's popular, that's where I am. That makes a big difference and I honestly don't have sympathy for people who write rare pairs and such and then complain about lack of engagement. You knew what you were getting into (it's mostly the Miraculous fandom that gave me this bitterness). If you're not writing what people WANT to read, then your audience is simply going to be smaller. And that audience doesn't owe you their attention, no matter how frustrating it is or how good your work is. I could be the best writer in the world, but if I'm writing RekixCherry fic, I have nobody to blame but myself when nobody reads it. BUT if that's your passion, and writing a certain unpopular thing makes you happy, then, again, you need to not be concerned with traction and your audience.

The last point I'll make is that it matters HOW you present yourself online. A good chunk of the well-known creators in any fandom are, simply put, older people. And those that aren't, and are able to connect with those older creators, have generally created a bubble around themselves of maturity and, like, of being nice, lol. A lot of creators are skittish these days, and if you're an asshole (anti) or fight a lot over stupid shit, you may get a bigger audience, but you will isolate yourself from other creators. And this is important because oftentimes it is your exposure to other creators that will get your work circulating. The reason I got popular in the ML fandom? I wrote a short angst fic and a really popular artist shared it/talked about it and the rest was history. But if I'd had a habit of being an asshole, probably wouldn't have happened. And, granted, I'm not saying don't voice your opinions, but if you're loud all the time, it does turn people off. Especially creators because they are oftentimes the ones being attacked. They don't want to pull more of that negative bullshit into their lives. I'll admit, when I was in the ML fandom, I was down for a fight, but then that's what people came to expect, and it probably did turn others off, and then when I didn't fight, or didn't think the way my audience thought I should, it, again, turned people off. It's really not worth it unless being that type of person IS your platform.

So, that's all the advice I can give, I suppose. And even if you do all this stuff, that still doesn't mean you're going to be popular. At the end of the day, the thing that I stick to is this—I do what I want, I love what I do, and I work hard. If I'm in a position to worry about all that other stuff, then sure, I do, but otherwise… There's no easy way to become popular and, quite frankly, it's better to just "live" working hard and being a decent person than it is to focus on all this bullshit. I've created a working environment where I function within these "points" quite naturally, so it's not something I think about (except for schedules, lol). Sometimes I get popular in fandoms, sometimes I don't. At the end of the day, it comes down to how much work you're willing to do, because you will always be giving more than you are getting back, so you have to at least enjoy what you're doing.

Seriously, just do it because you love it. And if the pressure of everything above is something you don't love (I like a good, high pressure situation, lol), then don't do it that way—it's not worth the grief.

[collectionoftulips]

re kate and edwina, i think objectively the biggest problem with s2 is pacing and how rushed the last several episodes, or actually, the second half feels, and why it feels like what you mentioned wasn't entirely resolved. and if charithra isn't coming back for s3, then we can't even assume they deliberately left it to be further developed in subsequent seasons. a hugely unpopular opinion, but i didn't actually hate most of s2 plots, i don't think k&e's relationship was that badly done, at least the gist of the conflict, it just seems super rushed in the end. and it winds up being like, 5-6 episodes of tension/build-up, 6-7 is like a fallout and then 8th is like, everything is wrapped up nicely now very quickly and a lot of it offscreen. and i don't actually mind that not every conversation between kate, mary, edwina, was shown, we didn't need to see everything, but together with other issues with the writing, the season imo ends up feeling unbalanced. (another my opinion is that many fans were disappointed bc they wanted edwina to be a superficial background character whose only purpose would be to be a kathony cheerleader. the book edwina is hardly a well-rounded character to be realistic)

Yeah pacing is a huge issue in season two, which is a shame because if the pacing was more balanced I would like to believe some of these issues wouldn't be so severe.

Up until the announcement that Charithra isn't coming back, I just kinda foolishly assumed that all of the Sharmas would be permanent fixtures in season three (but in retrospect I think it was probably more fuelled by the fact that I connected to their family more than the other Bridgerton families for some reason).

I have a complicated relationship to the subplots of season two (or the other plots, I guess I might call them). Theoretically, I wouldn't have minded them but, I think, for me, the biggest problem is that unlike s1, the subplots in s2 were not really connected in any way to the main arc. In s1, the subplots would eventually reveal something to either Daphne or Simon or mirror the journey they were at, etc. That made all the different bits feel like part of a whole. I did not have the same feeling with regards to season two (and even upon rewatching it again I feel the same). It makes the subplots, to me, feel like filler or like I'm not entirely sure why I'm watching it. Penelope's story I guess was set up for s3, Eloise's arc I'm still not entirely sure what the main point of it was aside from the fight with Penelope (like the stuff with Theo I'm not sure what they were going for there).

Because season two felt like they lacked a bit of narrative connective tissue (if you will), I wonder if that's why the lack of Sharmas in s2 stands out to me? Like, if we can now sadly dispense with the idea that they get more space in s3 😢, they constantly hinted at backstories and plots (like Mary's whole deal etc) and the lack of showing any of those things stands in stark contrast to the intricate insight we got into the Featherington's financial situation. I think being shown everything would indeed be excessive, but there were certain things that I think they could have given maybe five more minutes to, at least for the stuff that really matters (which at least to me would include the relationship between Edwina and Kate considering they were both sort of vying for the attentions of the same man and a lot of Kate's conflict was how what she wanted went against the good of her family).

That's at least my general take that I'm gradually building as to why I feel like season two felt so unbalanced. That in combination with, as you say, they had to squeeze so much into the last two episodes. So I'm not necessarily disagreeing with what you're saying but complementing it with my own take, if you will.

Not an expert on the books but I agree that book!Edwina was hardly a well rounded character (but she wasn't bad) and I didn't mind the sheltered spoiled younger sister vibe they went with her on the show (I don't understand entirely all the Edwina hate I hear being floated around) and I definitely like she got more of her own identity with flaws etc. so no complaints from me on that score.

Thank you so much for your ask ❤️

[twstheadcanons]

This is a lore question and a slightly specific one. Cater as a character and otherwise is super interesting to me but at the same time insanely confusing. While at first I thought he would end up having maybe slightly abusive family there's a possibility that's not the case. His sister's seem to enjoy dolling him up and his mother seems to go along with it and his father's a bit more absent. I think I would mainly like to know what his true self is truly reflecting and also if Trey seems to know about this 'true version'. Don't feel pressured to anwser this if you can't btw ❣️

Cater fans come get yall’s food.

S, iideally I’d go through events Cater’s prominent in (Beans Day, Halloween), but that would just make this whole post longer.  So I’ll be using Cater’s card stories for now.  What we know about Cater, on the surface level, is that he comes across as happy-go-lucky, energetic, social, trendy, superficial, flaky, and insensitive at times.  But that’s Cater on a surface level.

So for Cater, his major issues from his background are:

his family frequently moving to accommodate his father’s occupation as a banker

his sisters dragging him into their own interests that he was expected to accommodate as well

Cater repeatedly states he disliked getting dragged around by his sisters and having cutesy stuff he wasn’t genuinely interested in shoved into his face.  This would even happen on his birthday, where his sisters got him things they’re more likely to enjoy, which made Cater feel frustrated since he was supposed to be the focus on his own birthday.  But despite that annoyance, Cater understands his sisters didn’t really mean any harm.  From the sounds of it, they liked hanging out with Cater, and assumed that Cater enjoyed how they spent time together as well since Cater preferred to go with the flow, rather than rock the boat.  

In his Bday SSR, Cater mentions that his sisters became more considerate of his own interests and asked him what he wanted.  All three coming from a family where they move and lose close friends a lot, the sisters are probably close and want to stay close to their brother as well, since they’re the only consistent company in a similar age range.  His sisters are each other’s best friends, Cater didn’t have that growing up.  He also mentions his sisters and mother’s sweets-making kick, and how he eventually got over having sweets every day.  But when he protested, it’d disappoint and sadden them/they’d have dejected looks on their faces, which Cater didn’t know how to handle, so he made himself go along with their whims to keep them happy.  

This pours into his social media life, where he’s a peppy, cheery guy that posts upbeat content and responds with light, casual, carefree messages to people.  His Lab SR literally has him state that he ‘should always be happy and excited, after all’.  So, clearly, whatever dynamic the Diamond family has, while not what I’d call something as heavy as abuse, isn’t considerate of Cater’s feelings and views Cater’s ‘go with the flow’ ways as approval.  If he ‘breaks character’ of the devil-may-care person he is on the surface, it raises questions, and Cater would rather just avoid all that and enjoy himself instead of getting involved in anything heavy.

Again, Cater doesn’t like to rock the boat.  He also mentions in his Lab SR that this obsession with cutesy stuff became rather invasive, and he’d even be criticised or second-guessed if he didn’t go along with the idea.  Cater ends up accommodating that interest to prevent any debate, even if he didn’t actually care for them.  That said, with such an emphasis on aesthetics being the way he grew up, Cater has a good understanding and practical knowledge of decour and eye-catching designs, which makes him helpful and invaluable when the time calls for decour.  This is something Cater knows he’s good at, and enjoys showing off since the focus is on himself and he’s acknowledged for his skills.

With their family moving all the time, Caters gained and lost friends a lot.  Cater has an outgoing personality, at this point, it’s safe to assume he’s an extrovert, so making friends comes naturally to him.  But when you’re moving a lot, maybe sometimes in the middle of a school term, .  Cater needs engagement and social interaction, but at this point in his life, he’s tired of trying to keep up with old and new friends on deep levels, hence his interest and obsession with social media.

One thing to note about Cater: he likes cutting corners.  a lot.

In his R card “Portrait of Rosalia”, it’s understood that Cater being nice to Rosalia by throwing her a party with some lively students around is a way for him to get on her good side, because Rosalia overhears the teachers’ discussions of tests and future lessons so that he wouldn’t have to study for an upcoming history test: while Cater’s idea of a party to lift Rosalia’s spirits is in good nature, he wants something out of it that benefits him.  But while disappointed the plan didn’t work, he’s quick to brush it off, and Rosalia’s anger, by mentioning that she’s cuter when uptight anyway.

In his PE card “This betrayer!” Cater only have five laps left to do in PE.  But he hates how sweaty he is and how tedious the overall task is.  So he uses his UM to try and avoid doing all five laps himself.  Riddle catches him red-handed, and Cater tries - albeit I’m sure he knows it’s a lost cause - to flatter Riddle at the last minute.  Trey’s also involved, and despite leaving Cater in the dust, Trey also returns with Riddle, because Trey knows that Cater’s the type that tries to cut corners whenever possible, something against the rules in Heartslabyul.  Honestly, as far as Trey goes, Trey’s someone used to the way Riddle holds himself back.  Cater’s exterior personality wouldn’t be hard for Trey to recognise as Cater pushing himself or exaggerating points of his personality just to keep up an image. especially after being in the same dorm for three years.

In short, while he isn’t malicious about majority of the time, Cater will use others to get out situations and tasks he wants no part of.  This is a huge thing reflected in his UM, as it allows Cater to be in more than one place, so that he personally doesn’t have to be involved.  Growing up with two pushy older sisters, it makes he develops a UM that complements a need for escape when pure wit won’t work.  And despite being someone with a superficial interest in trends, that experience accumulates in him understanding the basics about social media and how it affects others, himself included, since it became the only way he could stay in contact with acquaintances and ‘friends’ from previous years. 

 Cater has a good understanding of how people, in general, work, especially those in his agegroup, which makes him rather crafty when he wants to string others along and get out of a situation.  This doesn’t make Cater a mean or conniving person, and in fact, he’s generally amicable and social.  Cater lives by a pretty ‘live in the moment’ credo.  He enjoys having fun and not getting overly serious about issues when he can help it.  There are instances where he doesn’t care about the situation he’s in, or thinks it’s lame/boring, but he tries to make the most of it as something to post about on MagiCam later to engage in low-effort social interaction for a mental break. 

Cater pretty much states this in his Halloween SSR:

“If I left there, they remained there. That’s why I’d rather have a casual and happy time with everyone instead of going steady. It’s like a circus troupe, you know, having fun hanging with people all over the world and then leaving. And that’s why MagiCam is the best. I suddenly got messages from acquaintances from the school I went to 3 years ago. Aren’t my casual and light relationships multiplying? It’s lovely! “

Social media helps him keep in contact with people on a low-effort level, so the risk of moving doesn’t damage his relationships online like it would physical friendships.  As for family, Cater’s feelings towards his family are difficult, tricky ones he has problems with.  He certainly doesn’t hate them, but their lifestyle, the moving and pushy personalities, don’t mesh well with Cater’s personality overall.  When Lilia tries to relate to Cater’s experiences of fleeting relationships, Cater can’t help but dismiss Lilia’s empathy as surface-level, since, to CATER’S knowledge (it’s not like he knows Lilia’s old as shit), Lilia’s always lived in the VoT with his own family and friends, which hits a sore spot with Cater:

““Cater: ….Family…huh.

Flashback Lilia: I feel like I understand you. But it is just as Cater says, it might be the truth that you should not attach yourself too much to one person in particular.

Flashback ends Cater: (That was full of lies. For a guy who grew up in the same place and never had to deal with rebuilding relations over and over… He wouldn’t understand my worthless and meaningless feelings.)

/Notification

Cater: Hello, Trey. What’s up? Huh? Are we doing our rehearsal for our night show at the stamp rally now? And is Deuce from my committee lacking in hands, so Ace is helping him out? Darn, Ace is definitely going to use this to ask me for a favor later!

Cater: Argh! And is Riddle on the verge of a rampage? I’ll be back soon, Trey, please calm him! It was such a pain getting involved in the biggest crisis of this Halloween week! No, for real! I’m not lying. That’s why you don’t have to say such cold things to me, kay? URGH, TREY, YOU’RE SO CRUEL!!

Cater: Now that Diasomnia’s turmoil has settled, it’s time to change the mood. No matter how you slice it, we’ll still separate if we become 4th years… It would be different if I repeated a year though. Anyway, I should just enjoy the memories I’m making “now”! I’ll surprise everyone with this charming skeleton costume! I’ll show them my serious side!”

Cater calls his own feelings ‘worthless and meaningless’, which likely ties into how he got dragged into his mother and sisters’ own interests over his own, and sometimes even criticised if he didn’t go with their flow.  He also expects the friendships he’s made in NRC (as we see with him talking to Trey about the rest of the Heartslabyul cast), to inevitably disappear after he and Trey are fourth years with their own internships and lives to live.  Because to Cater, the future of his life and relationships appear disruptive and inconsistent, so instead of fretting about them, he wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing at all times, hence why he cuts corners to make things easier on himself.  This is why he can come across as superficial and easy to get along with, because he doesn’t want to fret over the details.

unrelated but we’re team ‘former dorm leader cater’ here because him doing it because it sounds cool and fun fits perfectly with his personality

[pbandjesse]

I had a really nice day. My weird hot flashes and stomach cramps weren't as constant. They are still happening but it isn't as miserable. I think because it wasn't as humid that helped me not fall to pieces as much.

I slept alright. I had an easier time falling asleep but I find it really difficult to wake up when I don't have to leave right away. But I woke up and got out of bed and got to work at the things I wanted to accomplish.

Which was my paintings. I got washed and dressed. I felt alright but I was to hot for a lot of the day and so I was fussing with my hair and dress a lot.

But I had a little breakfast and got to work in my studio. I was able to finish all the watercolors. And get all the inking done. I struggled a little because I was having these weird hot waves. I did stop and take a few breaks to shake off my weird feelings. But I was able to finish and was super proud of myself.

And I decided that meant I should go for a drive. I took myself to second chance to wander around. And that was fun! I had a good time looking at the furniture. And they had an art installation which was pretty cool. I like the inflatable sculpture best.

And I had great luck finding candlesticks for the wedding. I got 6 and they are all really nice. I was holding all of those and wandering around and an older man who worked there stopped me to say I had made some great finds and I explained it was for the wedding and we ended up having s lovely conversation. He said he used to run an auction house and has done 11,000 auctions. And we talked about the possible histories of the peieces and he joked I was probably finding all the best peieces in the city. It's probably true.

He wishes me luck and I told him to have a good day. And I was off. I paid for my finds and headed out.

It was pretty warm out. But I was not ready to go home. So I went to value village. Which I mostly just enjoyed looking at weird stuff. I did buy a few little things. But mostly just listened to my podcast and wandered around. It was a good time. Even if someone broke something and everyone got real quick when it smashed. Scared us!

I went to taco bell next. I got a crunch wrap and ate in the car. I did not like the cinnamon twists. They tasted like Windex. Disappointing.

But it was time to go home.

I got back here, Nick was coming in as I was bringing in some packages that were left outside. Still no letters at all. Which is very frustrating. But I got all my stuff upstairs, the things I bought and the rest of my stuff in the car. And put things away.

I would work on my knitting. And my alphabet carving. I'm half way done now!! But I would have to keep stopping and starting because I was dizzy or hot.

James would come home and soon it would start to rain. Which was great. It should rain more. And it was huge drops. We stood on the fire escape and enjoyed that for a few minutes before we both got to work on things we were doing.

James worked on drawing the letters for our wedding banner. And I kept working on my carvings. It was a good night.

I took a bath. James made me a milkshake. And now we are in bed. I just remembered that dad said I could call him and I feel so bad that it got away from me today. He's dealing with a lot and I will call him in the morning.

I hope you all have a great night tonight. Sleep well my friends. Goodnight