#that said you can be a good person and still make idiotic choices sometimes

[odakota-rose]

#i can forgive genocide but i draw the line at being nuanced human beings ( @the-diabolic-acid ) why would you hide this in the tags

it's insane to me that people can't get past the nuances of rose and mickey's relationship and how they're both good people who don't do right by each other. like this is a show where the main character (allegedly) kills his entire species and you can't get past why two people who started dating in their teens might fuck each other up a bit

[drunkenbagel]

Hi *shy wave*

There’s so few people on here do Pedro pascal x reader fics 😭

Could you perhaps do one where reader is a director and dating Pedro secretly and he wants to go public but she’s worried about his fans?

Please and thank you 😊

yes of course!! i love writing of dearest pedrito hehe. thanks so much to you for reading, hope you like it <3

🎥private screenings🎥

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x f!reader Word count: 2k Content: angst but happy ending, no use of y/n, fluff ending

“Okay, take 30 to rest people! Thank you! Good work!” you shouted so everyone on set could hear.

Everyone relaxed and went to do different things, some to snack, some got lost in the set. You left your headset on your chair and hopped off. A couple of people stopped you to ask questions about the next scenes, and you tried to answer them as fast as you could while walking.

You walked outside of the studio and over to where the trailers were. While you were at the door of the trailer you were looking for, you looked at both your sides so you could make sure no one saw you there, and knocked softly three times. Almost immediately, a hand yanked you inside, making you yelp in surprise.

“About time.”

You scoffed and were going to answer, but Pedro held your face with one hand, sneaking the other around your waist, and kissed you. You closed your eyes at the contact and sighed, melting into the kiss.

“Missed you” he said in a whisper, linking your forehead with his.

“It's only been a couple of days” you said with a small laugh, caressing his face softly while kissing him again. “You can get free days off of filming, but I have to be there almost always”

“We can always make it public so I can visit you whenever I'm free, that way I could kiss you or hold your hand whenever we wanted”

You sighed, getting annoyed at his words. “We talked about this, Pedro. We can't do that”

“But why? We're both consenting adults and can make choices!”

You were growing more and more annoyed by his words, getting away from his hold. “I am a director, Pedro. It can be seen as an abuse of power, and there could be serious consequences. Not to mention your raging fanbase, who would very much hate me.”

“That's not true” he protested with a sigh. “I know the fans can be a little intense sometimes, but they'd come around. They essentially like my acting and want me to be happy, and if they don't then they're not fans.”

You walked away from him while grunting, running your hands through your hair. “No! We've discussed it a hundred times. Really, can you not respect my decision?”

“Your decision also affects me too! Haven't you thought about that? It's not only you!” he shouted. “Haven't you thought how it hurts me to keep you a secret for so long? It sucks!”

“If it sucks so much maybe we need to rethink this!” you shouted back.

The moment the words came out from your mouth, you regretted them. You didn't want to break up. Fuck no. This was the best thing you ever had, the most precious and sweetest person. You looked at him, and he was frozen with a shocked expression. His eyes were teary too, and when a tear fell down your cheek you furiously wiped it off your face.

Why did you always fuck good things up?

“I have to go.”

You started to walk to the door, and opened it, but before you could say anything, Pedro stopped you, grabbing your wrist.

“Don't do this” he whispered, and you didn't turn around, but you could feel the tears in his voice. You didn't want to start crying, not when you still had quite a few hours of filming ahead.

“My break is done soon” you said, letting go of his grasp, walking to your set. On the way there you had to stop on a bathroom to splash your face with cold water and gather your thoughts. You were sure you left Pedro crying, and that broke your heart, knowing it was your fault.

You're a fucking idiot, your mind said to yourself in the mirror. Driving away the best thing you ever had over some stupid secrecy.

When you felt less shaky, you splashed your face with cold water again and went back to your chair, resuming your work. At least you had a distraction for a few more hours.

·-·-·-·-·

When you got home you walked to your room and let yourself fall down to your bed with a grunt. You couldn't stop thinking of Pedro for the whole filming, of the sadness and hurt you saw in his eyes was consuming your mind constantly.

And it was your fault.

You hurt the most happy, adorable, harmless and loving person you could find, and you hated yourself for it. And why? Because he wanted to share you with the world. But it wasn't as simple as that and you knew it. Unfortunately as a director and a woman you could probably face a hell lot of backlash for having a relationship with a coworker. Because it had started as that, developing into the most beautiful, unique and amazing relationship you've ever had.

You were just afraid of the hate wave that would come over you, especially since Pedro was very, very loved by the public. And you loved him for it, he was the sweetest person with everyone, so down to earth even with the huge rise of his fame. He was great, and you were just average. You felt like if your relationship would come out, he would realize that he could do better and just leave. You were so, so afraid of it.

A groan left your mouth again on the pillow. You were so worried of messing up your career after everything you went through to be where you were. Unfortunately, being a woman in the industry and climbing up the ladder of success was still hard. But still, you wanted to be able to kiss Pedro any time you wanted, have him by your side without having to be wary of other people, hold his hand...

“Goddammit” you muttered, taking your phone from your back pocket and unlocking it.

You weren't going to let your fear get the worst of you this time. You opened Pedro's chat and sent a text:

“Sorry for the time, but can we talk?”

You left your phone in your nightstand and changed into a comfortable clothes for bed. He wasn't probably going to answer, it was very late. After letting out a shaky sigh and getting into bed, you turned the lights off and covered yourself with the duvet. You couldn't sleep, and ended up moving around in bed.

The sudden buzz of your phone made you jump to check it. It was him. It was a message from Pedro.

“Can I go to your place?”

Your heart skipped a beat. Now? I mean, you preferred to talk face to face, but... Ah, what the hell.

“I'll be waiting.”

A few minutes after you sent the message, you heard a couple of knocks in your door. You bolted from the bed to the entrance, and tried to tidy yourself up in the mirror by the door the best you could. With a hand on the handle, you let out a shaky breath and summoned all the courage you could before opening the door.

And there he was, with tired and sad eyes, waiting at the other side of your door.

“I... I'm sorry, I was just in a bar nearby, and-”

“No need to be sorry. Please, come in” you interrupted, stepping aside so he could come in. You both sat on the couch beside the other awkwardly, not knowing what to say.

“I want to apologize” you said looking at your fidgeting hands, in a whisper. “For my behaviour. My words. I know I was cruel and I didn't mean it. I- I need you to know that I didn't mean it and I don't want to break up, that's- That's the last thing I want.”

“I shouldn't have pushed you” he said, not looking at you either.

“That's what I wanted to talk about.”

“I got it, I won't do it again. I'm sorry.”

“No you won't, because I don't want to keep the secret anymore” you said, and as soon as the words left your mouth, he looked at you, confused. You repositioned yourself on the sofa, facing him.

“I've been so scared, so obsessive with not letting anyone infiltrate my personal life, that I haven't let myself enjoy it fully. At first the secrecy was exciting, and I guess I grew accustomed to it. But you said it yourself, by keeping our relationship private I'm just hurting you, which is the last thing I want to do. That made me realize what an idiot I've been trying to protect myself from the hate that I don't even know if it'll come! I-” you took a deep breath. “If it does happen, I'm more than willing to go though it, because you're worth it. You deserve a partner that loves you loudly and proudly and I want to be able to do that because I love you.”

Pedro's mouth twitched and you thought that maybe you went too far, or gave too much of a speech. He stayed silent for a couple of seconds, and then a big smile painted his lips, eyes a bit teary.

“You don't have to do that” he said, a hand going up to your cheek to cup it. “You don't have to come out of your comfort zone”

“I've had you in the privacy of my comfort for way too long, and I think it's time that I enhance that zone. I want to be able to hold your hand, kiss you whenever I want-”

Pedro interrupted you with a quick kiss. You let out a small laugh.

“Yeah, well, just like that. So, if it's okay by you, I won't be needing to keep the secret anymore.”

“I love you” he said again and again while peppering your face with small kisses all over. You couldn't help but laugh at the tickling. When he finished with the small attack, you linked your foreheads together.

“I have to get up in a few hours to go to the studio, but please stay? I don't want you walking around at this hours of the night.”

“Alright, I have to go too anyways.”

He took his clothes off and you both went back to bed, falling asleep in the arms of one another.

Next morning you got up earlier than him, showered and started making coffee. Taking two mugs, you carried them to the bedroom and left them in the bedside table. Pedro hummed when he heard you.

“Good morning sunshine” you said, kissing his face. He opened his eyes slowly and smiled.

“Hey” he said with a raspy voice. “Is that coffee I smell?”

“Fresh out for you” you said, reaching to the small table and giving him one cup and sipping out of the other. You both stayed in the bed until finishing your coffees, talking and laughing.

After that, Pedro got dressed with some clean clothes he had at your place and you both got into your car to go to work. Before going out of your car you had to breathe a couple of times, anxiety getting a bit high.

“It's okay” said Pedro. “We don't have to go out at the same time”

“Yeah, I know. Sorry” you apologized. You let out a breath. “Okay, let's go.”

Both of you got out of the car and he took your hand while he walked up to your set, which made you smile. “Here's my stop”

“I'll see you later?” he said looking at you, still holding your hand.

“I think I finish before you, so I'll get some lunch for us both, sound good?” you said while smiling. You could feel some stares, but you didn't tear your eyes apart from his. You got closer, leaning into him until you gave him a quick peck on the lips. “I love you. See you later”

He couldn't help but smile. “Yeah, see you later darlin'”

You watched him as he left the building, and one of your friends from filming came up to you.

“Care to explain, darlin'?” she said in a mocking tone with a smile.

“Short answer, that's my boyfriend. I'll give you the long one if you have a while” you said laughing while she locked your arms together.

[stxrysnow]

its me again!! For this one can it be megumi x reader, the reader is a bubbly, adventurous, curious and silly person but their extremely kind and witty. [also smart, and sassy at times] The scenario can be just them doing stuff together like baking, going to a playground, coffee date, its your choice!

— a taste of your love.

synopsis. megumi’s had his fair share of having people who’re energetic, loud and annoying— much to his distaste— though deep down, he knows he loves them; no matter how much he tries to deny it.

although, he just can't help but want a taste of you— a taste of your love.

genres/themes. megumi fushiguro x reader, fluff, golden retriever and black cat dynamic, baking with megumi!, megumi silently admiring reader LMAO, two idiots in love, megumi is learning to love the reader (precious boy omg)

jiah’s notes. hello! senkyu for making this request ! < 3 i wanna feed shiro and kuro the best dog biscuits that ever exist, just wait till i summon them. (/j

... unless? LMAOO)

word count. 1.3k

megumi was still in the process of understanding you.

now, now— don’t blame him, that poor guy has been surrounded by highly energetic people all his life— be it tsumiki, his oh so nice sister— though, sometimes too sweet for her own good— or his friend yuuji— simply a ball of sunshine, that guy was; although he was a bit… naïve at times, or satoru— his ‘benefactor’ (also the guy he didn’t like to admit was his father figure) — often regarding him as an annoying, loud idiot.

but strangely enough, megumi had learnt to love them all the same— something that came from deep within, something that was hidden under his aloof demeanour.

and oh he simply despised to admit it to himself— to admit that he actually cared.

“ ’gumi, hand me the chocolate chips, will ya?” your voice said, drawing him out of his reverie— a simple blink and he was reaching up for the ingredient in the cabinet, hands strangely having a mind of their own.

dark green eyes searching your own as he placed the container on the kitchen counter, lips slightly parted as if he wanted to say something—

yet no words came out. you always rendered him speechless, both literally and emotionally.

“aw, thanks!” watching your eyes light up in the way it always did whenever he did even the bare minimum— megumi didn’t try to notice how his heart skipped a beat, didn’t try to notice how he swallowed a lump in his throat that had formed without him realising.

didn’t try to admit how much he craved your attention— didn’t try to admit how much craved you.

“did you get the cakes for shiro and kuro? poor things, i can’t eat this infront of them,” you tut, stirring the brownie batter with practiced precision, and megumi didn’t miss how your eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly when you did so; how your teeth habitually dug into your bottom lip whenever you were focused— oh how he couldn’t help but notice every damn thing about you.

it almost annoyed him.

you turned your head to face him, the hint of a smile that was always there with you still playing at your lips— “oi, earth to fushiguro. what’re you thinkin’ ?”

keyword: almost.

“i have,” megumi answered, trying to sound stoic but even he didn’t miss the slightly hoarse undertone of his voice— making his ears turn a delicate shade of red. “don’t worry ’bout it.”

“ooo-kay, okay,” you chirped, letting out a small laugh— god, why were you even laughing?— now you’ve made his cheeks pink.

and yet, the boy wanted nothing but to hear the sound of your laughter again and again— until it would be embedded into his very soul, like some forbidden memory only he could reach.

“hm.”

slender fingers of his rested against the cool tiles of the kitchen counter as he turned his head in your direction as you worked, and for a moment, he couldn’t help but just stare— eyelashes fluttering so delicately against his pale skin that one might just think that he didn’t want to close his eyes.

and so he didn’t.

how could he? you were there. before his very eyes.

you and your pretty eyes which seemed to shine no matter how dark the world got, you and your kindness that stood out like a sore thumb against the crowd— you and your insufferable self—

you.

megumi’s gaze lingered on your form, eyes skimming over the smallest of details— every little scar, every little movement of your hand that caused a vein to twitch, every little, though barely visible, freckle or mole.

and for a moment, he wanted nothing but to just step over and bury his nose into his your hair and breathe in your scent, pull you into his arms and never, ever let go—

“you’re staring.”

and oh how he turned red— his breath catching in his throat whilst he blinked, looking at you with almost a comically bewildered expression— cheeks flushing such a pretty shade of red that you secretly vowed to yourself to do anything in your wits to make him blush like that again, and again.

“i— . . . uh,” megumi stuttered, mentally cursing himself for even falling for your unintentional charms— how he loathed, yet relished in that cheshire grin of yours, “ ’m not.”

“yeahh, sure you aren’t, ’gumi,” you cooed, a small snicker escaping your lips, and ah how the boy’s ears turned a deeper shade of red as he found himself growing more and more flustered by the passing seconds.

“don’t call me that.”

he tried to ignore the way your eyes lit up even more at his half-mumbled reply— grin widening even more in a way that almost made you look so dumb with how much you were smiling— but then again, that was one of the reasons why megumi was so hopelessly in love with you.

“oh? you don’t like it, hm?” snickering, you dipped a finger of yours into the rich brownie batter— holding it out to him in a silent invitation to taste it, all the while you held that damn smile on your face.

how he wanted to roll his eyes— like he usually did whenever someone else tried to pull a similar stunt— oh how he wanted to respond with a blunt retort that was somehow always oh the tip of his tongue, how he wanted to be annoyed by your teasing.

so, of course, he quietly stepped forward— gently bringing your finger up to his lips to taste the batter— of course he wanted to feel your touch on his lips for a little while longer.

it was always different with you.

“i have a name,” megumi grumbled, eyes looking anywhere but your face— fingers reluctantly letting go of your own, his free hand coming up to scratch the back of his neck. “the batter’s alright, by the way.”

“of course you have a name,” you huffed out a small laugh, transferring the brown liquid into a container, “though, i do distinctly remember you acting all grumpy when i called you megumi instead of ’gumi the last time we had a sleepov—”

“shut up,” he said in a slightly harsh tone, but you knew better than to take it seriously— partly because you were just too much of a light-hearted person to do so and partly because you knew that megumi needed time to process his feelings.

“mhm, okay,” you tittered, shaking your head as that smile never left your face— letting out a small gasp as you felt strong yet hesitant arms wrap around your waist from behind, and oh how your heart skipped a beat whilst you turned back to glance at him over your shoulder.

megumi nuzzled into the crook of your neck; dark locks spiking up in the same way which you adored so much whilst obscuring the view of his eyes in such a pretty manner that made your heart swell— arms wrapped in a tender yet firm grip, as if he was afraid to break you if he held on too tight— yet too frightened by the possibility that you might disappear the moment he let go.

“you’re so . . . annoying,” he mumbled against your skin, still refusing to meet your gaze, earning a hum from you in response.

“d’you hate it, though?” a small smile tugged at the corner of your lips whilst you tapped the container against the countertop, making the batter even out.

“yes,” he replied, but you knew better— of course you did, you always did— a pause of his movements, hands around your waist tensing up for a second before he spoke up again— “ . . . no.”

you could only let out a small chuckle in response.

“as i thought.”

understanding you and himself would take some time, he knew that.

but for once, megumi wanted to understand— wanted to know you, wanted to have a taste of you— a taste of your love.

☆ @dontcarehowlongittakes on tumblr. do not copy or post any of my works without my permission.

[hell-drabbles]

Lucifer and Ra-on 3

Summary: Ra-on cannot keep himself from being nosy. He had to see how you and Lucifer interact when he’s not here.

(Man Ra-on's my favorite punching bag. Here's another Ra-on not getting anything he wants.)

Ra-on knows it’s bad to be tailing you, especially when you’re such a private person, but you really leave him no choice. He’s been asking for advice, for ways to help with his relationship with Lucifer since you two have been talking more and more, but all you said was just to leave it be.

Ra-on has to reunite the devils somehow, and if you refuse to help him towards that goal, he really has no choice but to take matters into his own hands and peek in. Things between him and Lucifer have reached a point of stagnation.

Perhaps, if he sees the way Lucifer interacts with you, then Ra-on will get an idea as to how to move on forward.

So, he hid behind a wall, just within earshot of a quite conversation you’re having.

A conversation where the topic was all about him.

“I’m not going to pretend that Ra-on’s a good person and defend him just because. Sure, it does annoy me that you show that not-so-subtle hostility to him, especially back when you didn’t know shit about him, but…”

Lucifer was silent, his eyes closed and breathing so slowly it looked as if he fell asleep. But Ra-on has watched and he has learned. Your words are the only thing Lucifer can concentrate on. He closed his eyes to focus all his senses on your voice, on this conversation.

“But, you don’t spoil him, at all, no matter how helpless Ra-on tries to make himself be,” you gave a frustrated sigh, as though a memory popped in your head and all you could do was massage the back of your neck, “it was pathetic to watch him force himself be this bumbling idiot. Making himself trip over nothing, pretending to forget rules when he breaks them so nobody can get mad at him. It’s… well, I’m just glad you don’t play along, you know?”

…Ra-on doesn’t get you sometimes. One minute you’re conversing with him like you’re friends, protecting him when angels or devils get too close and his words fail him, and the other minute, you’re saying things like this. You’re not two-faced, this Ra-on knows well. He’s been on both ends of this treatment, you don’t hide it at all.

It’s just… Ra-on really has a hard time understanding why you continue to bother. He wants to question you. Honestly, confronting you would probably be the only way he can get his answers but, Ra-on can’t.

Being brave about anything has led him into trouble, no matter how he tries to go about it. And, the longer Ra-on is here, the longer Hell continues to shower him with the love and affection he was always missing out on, the more Ra-on thinks that you’re probably someone that can never be satisfied with anything he does.

So many devils love him, want him, and talk to him all the time. He’s never had this many lovers before. For the first time, Ra-on feels as though he did something right with himself, that perhaps he wasn’t the waste of space he thought himself to be.

Every devil loves him no matter how much he may fumble with his words. And Ra-on can’t help but love every devil in turn, after everything they have done and given him. For all this, surely Ra-on has been doing something right.

Surely, this is his reward after everything he has suffered.

…and yet, farther and farther away you go. You look at him and talk to him, but you’re still as tired as ever. Tired of him. Like it was his fault.

…

Lucifer open his eyes. It was always a shock, to Ra-on, that his eyes were capable of anything besides that intimidating apathy. They were warm, gentle.

Familiar.

…Minhyeok used to stare at him like that, way back when. But now, they were just sad.

Ra-on thought it rewarding that Lucifer’s eyes had gone from hostile to neutral, that their relationship had progressed into something a little more emotionally intimate, but in this moment, he’s realizing that they have barely progressed at all. In fact, there was no progression. Lucifer was just like you, tired of him, drained just by him existing in the same space as him.

But, Lucifer was an angel once, no? He’s not devil-born in origin and he loved God with every fiber of his being, right? And, Solomon is still deeply connected to him, so of course there would be lingering resentment. And, the other devils under Lucifer, they have to follow the will of their king.

Right, right, that’s it. Lucifer and Ra-on can become closer still, so that all the devil kings may be in the same room one day.

Ra-on has to try harder, so that he may one day see a smile on that beautiful face. How bright that day would be, to have that aimed solely at him. A smile on a sculpted body, that’s nothing short of paradise.

“Hell cannot be saved by someone who’s convinced of his own helplessness,” Lucifer leaned forward, as though about to whisper to you a secret, “Spoiling him, as the others have done, will only rot him further. I’ve seen it happen before with my own brothers.”

You leaned back on your hands, burying your hands in the grass. “So, it’s all for the greater good? That’s all that’s keeping you from spoiling him and giving him what he wants?”

Lucifer leaned further in still, fingers just barely skimming the edge of your nails.

Ra-on’s heart was caught in his throat when that devil glanced over to his hiding spot. He covered his mouth and retreated behind his corner of the wall.

“I want no part in a selfish human’s fantasies, savior of Hell or otherwise.”

…selfish? Being spoiled makes him selfish? Wanting to be closer to Lucifer makes selfish?

Ra-on peeked back over.

“However, if there’s anything you want to indulge in, then I wouldn’t mind trying to make your fantasies come true. I can give it to you. Everything.” The bloodied feathers on his back shivered, as though he wanted to fly. Or, perhaps, Lucifer wanted to embrace you with his wings. To hold you close, in the same way the devil kings did him.

In the same way they all did when they were offering their power to him in the form of a pact.

You blinked, then shifted your weight to one hand just to get a better look on his face. “That’s a nice offer you got there, Lucifer, but that’s alright. Anything I have, I think I can make come true on my own.”

Only then did he back away and finally gave you space. Lucifer laid back down on the grass and shut his eyes once more. “May that day come soon, then.”

[lostinthewiind]

Generation Kill fic requests you say? Can I get a Ray Person where sometimes he accidentally hits the radios buttons and the reader overhears his rants and comes back with some of her own? Or a Nate Fick angry and it triggers an “oh no he’s hot angry” reaction that the reader can’t hide?

Hotheaded

Nathaniel "Nate" Fick - Generation Kill

A/N: I couldn't choose so I decided to combine both prompts into one fic :)

Rating: 16+ (language)

"-and if you take a moment to really think about it, it makes total sense!" Ray's sped up rant continued over the comms, no doubt thanks to the amount of ripped fuel he had ingested over the past 24 hours. "This war isn't about money or oil or any of it! We're here because of sex!"

Slamming your head back against the headrest, you let out an exasperated groan. "How long has he been going on like this for?" You turned to look at Rudy.

Rudy glanced down at his watch. "About 10 minutes."

"Good God! How does he not know he's broadcasting this to everyone?" You slammed your boot down against the humvee floor and grabbed the receiver. "That's it. I can't listen to him anymore."

Rudy chuckled under his breath. "You tell him, little lady."

"Would the Whiskey Tango individual who insists on ranting about sex and his deranged theories about the origin of this war over the comms please shut the fuck up?" you snapped into the receiver. "I don't feel like listening to your family-fucking twang for the entire time we are sitting here."

You could hear a couple of laughs escape the humvees directly in front of and behind your own. For a few seconds, you thought Ray had actually caught on to how annoying he was being and shut up. Then the comms crackled to life once more.

"You sound just like the government, trying to silence the truth because you're scared about what it means for your good American values!"

"Ray, you wouldn't know the truth if it slipped into your bedroom at night and tickled your prostate!" you shot back. You weren't backing down until the idiotic RTO shut his goddamn trap. "And even if this war was about sex, what would you know about it when you look like someone who'd only get some through an unfortunate keep-it-in-the-family arranged marriage or if a blind woman took immense pity on you?"

More laughter. Even Rudy, who usually tried to stay out of the constant back and forth, couldn't help but crack a smile.

You could tell Ray was ramping up for another response, but before he got the chance, Lieutenant Fick's voice sounded over the comms. "Will you two idiots keep your lover's spat off of company-wide comms so the rest of us can sit here in peace and wait for further orders?"

You swallowed hard. "Sorry, sir," you apologized.

Ray's voice didn't follow. He didn't even apologize. Then you heard a distant shouting.

"Hey!"

You and Rudy shared a confused look. Leaning out the side of your humvee window, you spotted Ray doing the same thing at the front of the convoy, shouting back at you.

"What the fuck are you doing?" you shouted back.

"I get plenty of pussy, thank you very much!" Ray clearly wasn't done with the conversation, comms or not. "I wouldn't expect you to understand though, considering not even Manimal would get near your salmon-scented cavern, and he'd fuck anything with a hole!"

"Unfortunately, not all of us are born with a built-in dating pool—you know, that thing that regular people call the family tree! Or, in your case, the goddamn family circle!"

Ray furrowed his brows. You could see his mouth moving a mile a minute, but due to the sudden increase in wind, you couldn't make out what he was saying.

"What?" you called.

He tried again. Still nothing. Frustrated, he disappeared back into his humvee. "You keep telling yourself that, and when you're back home with no other choice but to sell your Iraq-worn body and dusty pussy on the corner, you'll remember what your old pal Ray said about the reason for war," he said, resorting to comms again.

"I think this is the longest I've ever heard him bicker with someone," Rudy pointed out. "You really know how to get him going."

"And I'm about to shut him down for good." You picked up the receiver one final time. "Ray, your unhinged theories are a direct result of your unique and equally unfortunate makeup of chromosomes, which could only come from someone whose mother is also their aunt! And when-"

The receiver was suddenly snatched out of your hand before you could end your finishing blow. With a sheepish smile on your face, you turned to see Lieutenant Fick standing outside your humvee, receiver in hand and a scowl on his face.

"Corporal, what the fuck did I just tell you?" Nate used his free hand to grab you by the collar of your uniform.

"Not to argue with Ray over the comms," you replied.

"That's right, Corporal." Nate leaned into the humvee, his bright blue eyes burning holes into your soul. "Now, tell me, are you just too fucking stupid to know how to follow orders or do you find joy in purposefully pissing me off?"

You felt a heat rise to your cheeks at the sight of Lieutenant Fick so angry. You had never seen him filled with this much rage, and for whatever reason, it was hot. Super hot.

You gently shook your head. "Neither, sir."

"Then why the fuck did I hear your voice over the comms again just now?"

"No excuse, sir."

"What's the matter? No rebuttal for your old pal Ray-Ray?"

You watched as Nate's face twisted into a horrible mixture of disappointment, anger, and exhaustion. "Ray, get the fuck off the comms before I come up there and throttle you through your humvee's window!" he snapped over the comms before throwing the receiver back into the humvee and releasing your collar. "I swear to God, it's like babysitting with you two."

You swallowed hard when Nate removed his helmet and ran his fingers through his dirty blonde hair. If this was turning you on so much, maybe Ray was right; maybe you did need to get laid more. Or maybe the Iraqi heat was getting to you more than usual today. Either way, you couldn't tear your eyes away from your Lieutenant.

"Something to say?" Nate caught you staring. "Or are you just getting a kick out of watching me snap?"

"No kicks here, sir," you assured him.

"Then what is it, Corporal?" he demanded. "Come on, spit it out."

You turned back to look at Rudy, silently pleading with him to save you. When all he did was shrug, you slumped your shoulders. "I really don't think I should say, sir."

"I didn't ask you to think. If I remember correctly, you attempting to have an original thought was what caused this whole thing in the first place. Everybody knows Ray rants. And everybody knows that if you just ignore it, he'll eventually stop. So, now that we're here, spit it the fuck out."

You were screwed. You just had to say it. "It's just that you're very attractive when you're angry, sir. That's all."

That stopped Nate's anger in its tracks. "What the fuck did you just say?" His voice had dropped into a low whisper.

You drew in a deep breath. "Did you want me to repeat it, sir?"

"No, I unfortunately heard you the first time." Nate looked over your shoulder at Rudy, who was looking out the window and pretending that he wasn't listening. "Corporal, switch with my driver. It appears you need some more direct supervision."

With that, Nate walked back to his vehicle at the rear of the convoy.

"Oh, my God, I cannot believe I actually admitted that!" You buried your face in your hands. "Why didn't I just say something else? Literally anything else?!"

"I don't know." Rudy was clearly amused by your misfortune. "You're right though. He is very attractive when he's angry."

"Right?!" You started to pack up your gear. "Well, wish me luck. If I don't make it to the next stop, you know who killed me."

Rudy gave a mock salute. "It's been an honour serving with you."

The walk of shame back to Nate's vehicle felt like an eternity, and when you passed the other driver, you didn't dare make eye contact. After stowing away your gear, you climbed into the driver's seat and settled in. Nate watched you like a hawk the entire time.

"I'm sorry about arguing with Ray over the comms, sir," you apologized once more, hoping it would help you get back in your Lieutenant's good graces.

"No apology needed, Corporal," he told you. He was much calmer now; back to the regular Lieutenant Fick you were used to dealing with. "I can't count the number of times I wish I could have done what you did. Ray and his fucking rants are the main reason I cannot wait to get out of this damn war. I'd quite literally rather take a bullet to the chest."

You couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sure we'd all appreciate watching you tear him a new one some time."

"Maybe," he sighed.

"- it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up. Lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability. If more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over here and fuck 'em up like this! 'Cause a nut-bustin' haji is a happy haji." Ray had once again accidentally turned the comms on while ranting to his passengers.

You watched as Nate gritted his teeth. Then, completely unexpected, he picked up the receiver and handed it to you. "Tell that fucker to shut his hole, Corporal."

"But, sir, I thought ..." you trailed off.

"I'm not the only one who's hot when they're angry." He smirked, and when you finally took the receiver from him, he sat back and got ready to enjoy the show.

"Pretty sure I said 'attractive', sir," you corrected. "But hot works too."

[ask-house-of-suns-au]

Some Fun headcanon facts about Dark Sun.

- He is just a 'normal' Sun.

- He also looks just like a normal Sun, just extra coats and extra ribbons.

- His left eye is horrible because it is where he upgraded his intelligence the first time (It was an excruciating experience.) and that also partly the reason why he wears glasses.

- There is not a single thought not related to murder inside his eyes.

- He is the Batman. People think Dark Sun's intelligence is the most dangerous part of him but actually it is Dark Sun's preparation. He not only has tons of backup plans and plans, but also, he knows people. He knows even if he is the smartest, someone will be smarter than him, have luck on their side better than him.

- He has a bad habit of hiding one of his hands behind his back, just in case something goes bad.

- He loves to pretend he is just a weak dumb Sun to fool Eclipse and Abused Moon, and stab right on their back when they lowered their guard.

- There is nothing more satisfying to him (he will not be admitted to it) more than seeing Eclipse or Moon or everyone has hurt him and variant of Sun begging at their knees because they had failed and they were wrong.

- He doesn't actually hate Servant. He just hates things that get out of his plans, and seeing Servant refuses to die while back then succumbing to Lord Eclipse makes he feel a little bit angry, even though he knows Servant didn't have any choices.

He secretly pitied Servant but also he thinks there is no point of fixing them and it is better if they just die. Rather than living like an almalgamon of Eclipse and Sun. A husk of someone has been gone for so long.

- He used to have a really complicated relationship with Sundrop but then they split up and agreed to never have a word about it never again.

- He can change his eyes colour, from white pearl to red because he usually robbed from Moons and it is easier to let them mistake him as their Sun. (it is also easier to kill them.)

- He and Sun have the same way of dealing with people who don't listen or just simply being idiot. He will ask them if they know where they went wrong and make them admit their mistakes. If Sun only does this when he is angry or when they have crossed the line, then Dark Sun does it a lot because he likes the way he makes people feel like they are stupid.

- He is a sadistic person. Not only does he want people he hates to kneel down to him in pain, he also wants to look at their eyes and see how much they hate him but couldn't do anything because they are stuck inside his palm.

- He sucks at playing games. He is also a salty loser, which makes him never play the game he loses ever again.

- He is actually a decent person when he isn't scheming or planning about everything.

- He thinks of SunBOT as a kid he never wants but still has. Having said that, never let SunBOT and Dark Sun alone together unless you want to see something for shit uncontrollably.

- He likes dolls, puppies and everything soft. The reason why he wears his jacket is because he wants something soft and warm to cover him and also he likes being cute. (Secretly)

- He has a very long long name for his dragon before changing it back to some nickname that is shorter than Sun's relationship.

- He likes wine, the expensive one. His hobby when he didn't think about how to fuck over Moon's life is just sitting around his Dragon and petting it while reading a book.

- He is a very good actor, he and Cringe Sun. Sun is the third place, and Sunny is the fourth.

- He is lonely. And he is terrified of what he did might be wrong but he just keeps going forward and never looks back.

- He still has nightmares and hallucinations but he never lets it affect him.

- Sometime he will be too much unhinged even for himself, especially around Sun or Servant. Which makes him have to go isolate himself for a while before getting back to normal unhinged.

- He doesn't want to hurt people who didn't deserve it but he will not hesitate to put some lessons for them to not fuck with him anymore.

- He likes cooking, but his cooking is terrible.

[flowerpotmage]

Tight Grip, Broken Dam (3)

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You don’t question it anymore, when Miguel appears in your bed at night. He’s not there for sex, no, you’ve never even kissed—though you would be lying if you said you weren’t open to the idea of kissing him. He’s there for comfort. For rest. If only it could stay so simple.

Pair: Miguel O'Hara & GN!Reader

Notes: ambiguous relationship, slow burn, big sibling dynamic with gwen stacy

Word Count: 3,106

Read this chapter on Ao3 here. If you like my work, please consider leaving kudos there as well! You do not need an account to do so.

A/n: For the one full Spanish sentence I used spanishdict upon recommendation from more fluent speakers, as my own Spanish barely qualifies as basic (but I am actively studying! hooray). If you are interested in being a language beta/translator, let me know!

“I miss Miles sometimes,” Gwen admits, pushing around a few stray beans on her dish.

You look at her, softening in understanding. “Peter talks about him sometimes. He sounds like a good kid.”

Gwen sighs. “Yeah.”

“Hey,” you say after a moment, leaning across the table a bit. “I don’t blame you. If I had a friend like that, after what you’ve been through? I’d miss him too.” You shrug nonchalantly as images of you holding Miguel, of Miguel holding you, zip through your mind.

She lifts her eyes, looking into yours. “Yeah?”

You nod. “I think they’re too hard on you about it. It’s not like friendship falls into the laps of people like us.”

“Yeah,” she lets out a small puff of air that would barely even qualify as a chuckle if it weren’t for the lopsided, somewhat forced smile on her face.

You let the silence linger, and then; “That’s a lot of half-hearted ‘Yeahs,’ kid. You wanna go get a treat and web up some idiots?”

Gwen laughs. Success.

“Yeah, that sounds great.”

And so you do. The two of you suit up and leave for the afternoon to do your spidery duties, swinging and helping and stopping people where needed. You make good on your promise to get treats when the sun begins to set, the two of you walking into a charming ice-cream parlor in full Spider-Person get-up and leaving with milkshakes (“Your world uses printed ceramic for takeout containers?” “Yeah? What do you use?” “We mostly use plastic.” “Dude. That’s so bad for the environment.”) and fresh stamp cards.

You find a place to perch and drink them, somewhere up high where you can take your masks off and relax. Your legs dangle over the ledge and the city is spread out before you, the glass windows of the buildings glittering under the low angle of the sun like a mess of craft store glitter someone tried, and failed, to clean up.

“How do you do it?” Gwen asks, lifting the soft blanket of silence.

You finish your sip, turning to look at her. “Do what?”

“The two lives thing,” she says, looking down at the ceramic takeout cup she holds in her lap.

You look out over the city, blowing air through your lips. “Honestly? I was never great at multitasking.” You pause, watching a crow soar by. “I probably ruined a lot of relationships by prioritizing being the Spider.” She’s lifted her gaze now, staring at you with big round eyes. “And…” you shrug. “I think some things that happened, some choices I made, cost me some people in my life. And… not just socially.”

“Your aunt,” Gwen says softly.

You nod slowly. “I think if she had known, if I hadn’t been so afraid to tell her… I think there’s a chance things could have gone differently.”

Gwen looks at you for a long, long moment.

“But,” you say, voice lighter. “There’s no changing the past. We just gotta do our best with what we have in the present.” You nudge her shoulder. “Even if there’s some things we can’t change, we can still make the most of the rest. Y’know?”

She gives you a small, sad smile, before turning to look at the city. “Yeah. That’s probably a good way of looking at it.”

You swing your legs in the open air over the building’s edge, thumping softly against the brick in slow rhythm as you return to sucking down your shake. You put the cup back down, only dregs left, and look at her again.

She sighs, looking at you once more. “Stop that.”

“Wh-!” You do an exaggerated double take, throwing your hands in the air. “Stop what? I’m not doing anything!”

“The whole ‘sad, sympathetic older-sibling’ look you’re giving me,” she kicks her dangling foot towards your swinging ones, and the two of you get into a mini foot fight that dissolves into easy laughter.

“Okay, okay, jeez,” you raise your hands again, this time in surrender. “Teens, man, so touchy about normal human emotions and bonding,” you push her shoulder and stand, pulling on your mask. “C’mon then. Finish up your shake and we’ll go web up some more doofuses.” With that you web your empty drink into one hand, and with the other you shoot a web to swing off back into the depths of the city.

Gwen shakes her head with a little smile, takes one last sip, and follows on her own rope of web.

“Ready to go? Got all your stuff?”

“Yup!” Gwen replies, slinging her backpack over her shoulder.

You lift your wrist, tapping the golden-yellow screen, and your living room turns to molten gold as the portal opens up.

“Alright, get through quick. There’s no way this is good for the houseplants,” you usher Gwen past you into the portal, glancing around the room as she steps through, and then follow close behind.

The portal spits you out at the entrance to the lobby where numerous other Spider-People mingle and wave, greeting you as you make your way through, a chorus of hellos followed by Gwen’s name and your own.

“Spider-Teacher’s in today, yeah?” You ask one particularly young Peter Parker as the two of you cross paths.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” he nods rapidly. “I just left his office.” He throws a thumb over his shoulder.

“Great. Good to see ya,” you wave as you pass and continue further into HQ. When you and Gwen come to a crossroads, you stop. “I’ll leave you to it,” you say. “I'm gonna see if Peter’s around with Mayday.”

“He’s probably with Miguel,” Gwen says, ever so slightly emphasizing his name and dragging out the L.

“Uh-huh,” you say, pretending not to notice her pointed look and teasing smirk. “Maybe.”

Gwen gives a little wave and then she’s off, swinging through the walkway beams towards where Spider-Teacher’s office is.

You move to the side, out of the way of foot-traffic to stand on a wall, and call Peter B. on your watch.

His head and shoulders appear, floating above the screen.

“Garden Spider!” His enthusiastic voice greets you, and you chuckle at the nickname. “How are you? I sure hope this is a social call or I’ll be suuuper bummed out.”

His smile is contagious, so you laugh. “Yeah, yeah it's a social call. Are you at HQ? I have some time to kill and figured I could say hi to you and the baby.”

“Absolutely! You know, I was just showing Miguel some pictures, she had her first apricot last week, and–” Peter’s cut off by something, and he glances over his shoulder. “You’re doing fine, just a sec.” He looks back to you and lowers his voice. “I’m in Miguel’s lab, you wanna come by? He’s a little cranky today, though, so you might wanna bring a peace offering from the caf.”

“Sure, I can do that.”

“Great! See ya soon.”

“See ya.”

The holo call ends and you swing off to the cafeteria, figuring you might as well get lunch for all three of you, and maybe a snack for Gwen too for when she's done. So you order her a burrito, Miguel the usual empanadas and–

Your eye catches on a new menu item.

“No fucking way.”

“Yes way,” a random Spider-Man next to you in line replies, seeing what you’re looking at. “And they’re actually pretty good.”

You grin, turning to the cashier. “Two of the special, please.”

Peter greets you by name and wide open arms when you reach the lab. You return it with one arm, your other holding the food you’ve brought from the cafeteria.

“Hey Peter,” you pat his back companionably. “I didn't know if you were hungry or not so I brought some food for you too, just in case.”

“Excellent,” he releases you and rubs his hands together in a show of exaggerated excitement. When he glances over his shoulder into the main lab behind him like an unplugged bouncy castle.

“That bad, huh?”

“He’s been overworking the last few days. Probably not getting enough sleep again, too,” he says quietly as the two of you begin to walk down the hall.

Guilt wraps its hands around your ribs, pulling them tight to squeeze around your lungs.

“Oh,” you manage to say. “Well, maybe we can get him to take a break for long enough to eat with us.”

Peter pats your shoulder, and then the hallway gives way to Miguel’s lab. You’ve been here enough times in a professional capacity that you should be used to the dim light, and your eyes are at least, but it still strikes you as rather Draculaic.

You’re sure if you mentioned that, he’d go on another one of his ‘I don’t understand why everyone continues to compare me to a vampire, they all know the fangs are a spider mutation and I don’t drink blood-’ rants.

The first thing you note is that his working platform is already lowered, his back to the hallway as he works, a gloved hand moving through the air across the yellow holo screens. The second thing you notice is the sleeping, redheaded, chubby baby cradled in his arm and drooling on his suit.

Something new rattles against the inside of your ribcage, elbowing the guilt aside.

“Miguel!” Peter calls. “Garden Spider brought lunch, take a break and eat with us!”

Miguel turns, his eyes land on Peter and then immediately flick to you.

“You are overdue for lunch,” Lyla says by his shoulder.

“Hey,” you smile and lift the bag of food. “I brought you two of those empanadas that Jess always gives you grief about.”

His eyes flick to the bag, then back to your face. The ghost of a frown tugs the corners of his mouth down. “They’re good empanadas.”

“You don't gotta defend ‘em to us man,” Peter says. “Now are you gonna get down from there and eat with us, or what?”

Miguel jumps down from the platform, using his free hand to keep May secure against his chest. She sleeps through the drop, something you’d find surprising with any other kid, but with what she and Peter get up to…

As Miguel walks to Peter to hand May back to him, you move to perch on one of the clear level surfaces and set the food down, taking the containers out from the to-go bag. Peter and Miguel join you after May is securely back in the baby carrier perpetually strapped to her father’s chest.

“Empanadas for you,” you pass Miguel the first takeout box, offering a small smile. He accepts, pausing minutely when your eyes meet, before looking away and taking one of his gloves off with his teeth. “A burger for Peter,” you say when you manage to pull your eyes away, and hand him the next box. “Aaand one for me.”

“Oh, I can’t wait. You know I love burgers. You know, when I first met—Woah. Oh my god,” he bursts into laughter. “What is this?”

“What is what?” Miguel asks dryly, opening his food with his now ungloved hand.

“Dude, they made you into a burger!” Peter places a hand on Miguel’s shoulder, holding out his open food container of burger and fries.

Miguel turns his head to look. He wrinkles his nose, eyes snapping to Peter who doesn’t even flinch. “What the hell is that?”

“It’s the Spidey Special,” you say with as best of a straight face as you can muster, opening your own box.

Miguel looks at you, eyes flicking down to your own open container and back to your face before he looks up into the air exasperatedly. “Dios mío, me convirtieron en una hamburguesa… You’re killing me here.”

“I take it you had no idea?” A bit of your smile escapes your efforts to contain it.

Miguel rolls his head to look at you. “Do you really think I would have allowed it if I did?”

You smile fully. “Fair enough.” You look towards Peter, who’s already started to eat, and ask; “How is it?”

“‘S d’lish’ss.”

“Wonderful.” Miguel remarks, voice dripping with sarcasm. He takes a bite of his empanada.

“C’mon,” Peter says, holding the burger out towards Miguel. “Try yourself! You taste great.”

You nearly choke on your first bite of your own burger, Miguel turning his head to look at you with a slightly furrowed brow. You wave him off. “”M fine, ‘m fine,” you say, patting your chest.”

“C’mon,” Peter says again, waving the burger towards Miguel again, who can barely repress his wrinkled nose.

Knowing Peter won’t give up, you interrupt.

“You can always have a bite of mine if you don’t want Peter’s half-eaten mess,” you say, nerves suddenly dancing in your chest when Miguel looks you directly in the eye.

“Oy!” Peter says.

Miguel looks at the box you offer to him, your burger sitting neatly inside with only a single bite taken out. His eyes sweep back up to yours, and he sets his takeout box aside. When he accepts your food his fingers brush over your knuckles with all the gentleness and warmth of a sleepy cat’s tail.

The gaze is finally broken when he turns forward to take the burger out of the box, and something high in your chest jumps and heats like a firework smoke-bomb on a chilly summer night as his mouth closes over where your own single bite had been. His eyes return to yours, flicking down and back up so quickly that if you didn’t have your radioactive spider induced super-senses you’d think you were mistaken.

“‘S fine,” he says, swallows, and places the burger back into the box. He passes it back to you, lowering his gaze.

Peter scoffs and mumbles: “Uh-huh. No taste.”

Miguel eats, occasionally watching while you and Peter catch up. You show him pictures of your largest plant’s newest leaf and he shows you pictures of May, who wakes up part way through the meal and climbs into your arms.

“Hi sweet l’il Mayday,” you coo, bouncing her in your arms, sending her into a fit of giggles while Peter takes pictures.

“I should get back to work,” Miguel says, abruptly standing from his seat.

You, Peter, and even May both stop and look at him.

“Oh, um–”

“Thank you for the meal.” Miguel leaps back up to his platform.

Your stomach sinks.

“I… should probably get Mayday home,” Peter says, making meaningful eye contact with you and gently taking a once again giggling May from your arms and sliding her into the carrier. He nods his head towards Miguel, widening his eyes pointedly at you. “I’ll see ya later boss!”

Miguel doesn't reply as his platform starts to move back upwards, so Peter slips out, leaving the two of you alone.

“Miguel?” You ask from your seat by the empty food boxes.

He doesn't reply, the acknowledging tilt of his head is the only indication he’s heard you.

You pick under your nails and glance around the room before standing to brush off any crumbs that might have landed on your suit. You take a breath to beat back the hands once again grabbing and squeezing your ribs, and shoot a web that swings you up to his platform. His shoulders tense at the sounds of your feet landing on the metal.

“Hey,” you say softly. “Are you-?” you reach out a hand to touch his back, the muscles that cover his shoulder blade, too short to reach his shoulder-proper without encroaching much too close into his space.

Your watch beeps, Gwen’s holo appears out of the screen, and you pull your hand back before it reaches home.

“Shit,” you mumble, then at a normal volume; “Hey Gwen!”

“Hey,” she smiles. “I just finished up with teacher Spidey, where are you?”

“Oh, I just finished lunch with Peter and Miguel–”

Even in miniature holo form you can see the suppressed smirk and raised eyebrows.

“Cool, cool,” she says with pretended nonchalance. “Do you want to just meet me back at your place?”

“I, uh–” you glance at Miguel’s tense, slumped shoulders. “Yeah. Yeah I’ll see you in just a bit.”

“No rush!” She says with a cheeky grin.

You open your mouth to reply, but her holo is already gone.

“...Cheeky.”

Your eyes snap to Miguel, who's quirking an eyebrow over his shoulder at you. Your face warms. He turns back to his screens, and you cross your arms, wrapping them around your middle in an approximation of a hug. You rock back and forth a few times on the balls of your feet. “Sooo… Peter said you've been working a lot.”

Miguel’s hand pauses in its path through the air from one screen to the next before it continues. “I always work a lot. It's kind of my whole thing.”

You sigh through your nose. “Yeah.”

Silence sits like a fat cat uncomfortably kneading on one's kidneys until he speaks again.

“How is your work going? Your day job, I mean. At the paper.”

You blink. “Oh, uh it's fine. I'm ahead of schedule so I'm taking a day or two between stories.”

He nods. “Good. That’s uh, good.”

Silence, again.

“Do you… Do you want some company while you work?”

Miguel turns to look at you, something soft and vulnerable in his eyes. This Miguel you recognize all too well. So you offer a small smile, tilting your head to the side.

“Yeah. Alright.”

You perk up. “Can I help at all, then?”

He quirks an eyebrow, the corner of his eyes crinkling with his slight smile. “Leave it to me and Lyla for now.”

You chuckle slightly, leaning against one of the consoles carefully so as to not press any buttons. “Yeah… Probably better if I don’t.”

He frowns. “Don’t do that.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Do what?”

He gestures his hand vaguely, crossing his arms in a reflection of your own. “Say that all… self deprecatingly.”

“Oh, I didn’t–”

He raises an eyebrow.

“Okay, okay,” you lift your hands in surrender, laughing lightly. “Point taken.”

“Good,” he smiles, turning back to his own console. “Lyla.”

“Hiii,” the virtual personal assistant pops into existence in the space by his right shoulder. “And hiiii to you too!” She says in a singsong voice, wiggling her fingers at you in greeting.

“Hi Lyla,” you give a little smile and wave back, and then settle in to observe while Miguel works.

This time the silence sits like it usually does with you two: gently, like a warm blanket.

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[byizoyas]

DECEMBER 3RD. — heather by conan grey

sfw | gn!reader | unrequited love | angst

‘where is she…’

kaveh couldn’t keep his eyes off the front door of the library while you were both sitting, waiting for the other members of the group to join you.

you were not a huge fan of group works, especially when paired with your friends as you would always find it hard to focus on remaining serious; half of the time ending up chatting instead of doing the work.

and kaveh being in your group this time was definitely not helping.

you were honest with yourself on the feelings you had for him, and despite trying hard to not make it obvious, you sometimes caught yourself staring a bit too hard at his perfect face.

��seriously, are they all going to be late ?’ he turned to you, asking his question and you only shrugged your shoulders as a response.

‘am i too insufferable to be alone with for you to be so impatient to see the others ?’ you asked, feigning to be hurt.

he let out a cute little laugh, pushing you away softly before holding you into his arms for few seconds. ‘idiot i’m not saying that in that way, i love spending time with you.’

you knew it was friendly coming from him but a part of you couldn’t help but hope for something more.

your mutual friend entered the room as the two of you looked back at the door. ‘finally ! where have you been ?’ kaveh grumbled, arms crossed against his chest when she sat next to him.

‘i bought a few things to eat as we’re working!’ she then turned to you, handing you a little bag with some biscuits you were particularly fond of. ‘are they still your favorite ?’ she asked, a beautiful smile on her glossy lips and you smiled back at her, nodding yes to her question.

‘thank you!’ you said, before your eyes remained fixed on the sweater she was wearing.

you examined it. it was a light beige color, made of the finest cashmere. kaveh had one like that and he never ever shared it to anyone, as he genuinely cared for that clothing.

‘is it.. kaveh’s sweater ?’ you asked, pointing at the clothing.

your friend turned back at kaveh, the two of them sharing a knowing gaze before laughing together, kinda excluding you.

if only you were stupid, perhaps you wouldn’t have asked a question whose answer was about to break your heart.

‘can we tell you something ?’ kaveh asked, whispering as he got closer to you. why was he making such a big deal of this ? what kind of secret was about to be revealed to you ?

‘kaveh and i are together, but no one knows yet ! only you !’ your friend exclaimed proudly.

if you were in a movie, now would probably be the start of a sad piano song. unfortunately you couldn’t even comfort yourself with a piece of music.

you were stuck there. stuck with them who were exposing their genuine happiness to your face. but how could you reproach them when you didn’t even tell anyone about your personal feelings.

‘oh- uh- wow that’s so nice !’ you gulped.

you weren’t one to lie about your true feelings, and you weren’t so good at it either but now that it was threatening to destroy two important friendships you had, you had no other choice but to feign happiness for them.

‘don’t tell the others when they arrive okay ? we wanna keep it a secret for now.’ kaveh started saying ‘but since you are our dearest friend, we can include you in our secret!’

the worst part of that was that you couldn’t even be glad of their trust. you were absolutely incapable of feeling anything positive right now. all you wanted was for your other three friends to arrive quickly for you to stay quiet without being suspicious.

the large smile on his lips faded when he saw your face. it appeared pretty clear that you weren’t happy and he had no idea why. because you were childhood friends and you promised to always be there for each other, didn’t you ?

‘are you okay y/n ?’ kaveh asked, taking your hand in his, genuinely worried about your sudden calm and quiet behavior.

‘yeah i’m super happy for you, just a bit surprised ! but i’m also stressed out about the deadline, does it bother you if i work by myself since the others are not there yet ?’

this, was the very best lie you’ve ever told. kaveh nodded ‘sure, we’ll stop talking to not bother you then!’

‘no need, i’ll go over there.’ you told him.

you got up from your chair, taking your stuff to go work elsewhere, anywhere but with them. she was your friend, yet you couldn’t help but feel resentment towards her.

jealousy surely took a hold of yourself too.

‘they forgot the biscuits !’ your friend told kaveh when you were already too far to hear her.

‘it’s okay, i guess they’re not so hungry today.’

kaveh glanced several times in your direction. he wasn’t sure to understand what was happening to you, but he respected your decision to be alone; despite his desire to spend time with you.

little did he know you not only needed an afternoon away from him to feel better. he was the first man you’ve ever loved, but you were just a really good friend to him.

surely he was gonna be okay, but you wouldn’t.

[sevi007]

Tales of the Abyss playthrough part uh. 24.

I'm writing a book here!

(It's a picture book no worries)

Huh?

(you wanted to marry him not too long ago, Anise)

GUY! The man!

I mean, he basically just said "he's an idiot, but he's MY idiot" - but that's alright. I could cry right now - and I'm sure Luke could too. What a - well, a guy! Sorry the name is silly! But he's the best! Literally the only one in a whole team who believes in Luke after all this still (which is a little sad, but makes it all the sweeter).

Yes? That's why he is going? Genuine confusion.

And the other Luke is just - what. Because he is a replica, he is nothing? That's a poor choice of words there, Natalia. The past seven years shaped Asch and Luke into extremely different people, which you even commented upon yourself. Luke is his own person, just as Asch is.

(I'm sure she has no ill intentions here, and I am not blaming her here. I'm starting to feel like the idea of a "replica" being a different person from the original is giving the party a hard time to wrap their minds around, especially since they are still angry at Luke for Akzeriuth.)

Lemme hug this man.

Better yet, let LUKE hug this man.

Secret detected! Did Van tell him what exactly? I'm making googley eyes at Guy.

Oh maybe Asch did something to Guy when he was a God-General? But no Guy was already with Luke at the time... It must have been something that happened before the kidnapping, but that would mean Asch could not have done much, he was a kid.

Either he was simply an AWFUL charge to look after for Guy (which seems silly) or the Fon Fabre family and Guy have... I don't know. Blood vendetta between families? Romeo and Juliet situation? XD

Ouch. The party really needs to wrap their minds around the fact that seven years are not simply erased by the entire replica situation. Luke has grown into his own person in those years, while Asch had to face a lot (probably horrible) things and has become a different person than he was.

This is no "hooray we got OUR Luke back!" situation, there's a lot of trauma behind that.

See, this is why I think Natalia cannot be blamed even if she is sometimes callous or unthinking. She is really trying hard to be a good princess who helps the world - not only her own people - but she was sheltered, just like Luke was. It seems Asch was not quite as bad as Luke was, back as a kid, and had his eyes a bit more open, understood a bit more - but they are kids. They mess up. They don't know everything. They can be cruel by saying things without thinking. And these guys especially - they are children forced to carry the weight of a princess' title and a duke-son's title on their shoulders, with all the politics that come with it. That's no easy job!

Oh hell, he IS traumatized.

Great job Van, you fucked not one but TWO teenagers in your care! (Three if we add Tear)

@ahsokaisawesome

@magicmetslogic

[captmickey]

Alleyway Confessionals, a Three Adventurers fanfic

Because sometimes you need to vent in the form of using characters to do as such. Which I did.

Tada.

---

Link walked past the endless crowd until he found himself in a quiet alleyway. With all the festivities that were happening in the town center, he would have been more surprised to find anyone here continuing the celebration, to continue the rowdy cheers and chatter.

Instead, he found no one except one person.

The one person he was looking high and low for.

Sitting on a crate that was up against the wall with his arms crossed and eyes closed was Guybrush, the subject of his search, appearing to look like he was taking a casual nap to the unfamiliar. But Link knew better. Having travelled for so long with the pirate, he knew entirely well that Guybrush right now was anything but napping.

Link knew that right now, in this instance, Guybrush was trying to keep whatever intense emotion in-check.

His own brows furrowed at the sight of the pirate and he balled his hands to a fist as he took a few quick steps closer. He knew Guybrush was awake, knew Link was here, but he was opting to keep his eyes shut. And Link simply wasn’t going to have that.

Not after what just happened.

“Guybrush.” He said.

“What now?” Guybrush muttered, eyes still shut.

“For starters, you could give me the simplest courtesy of looking at me.” Link crossed his arms.

Guybrush contemplated, exhaled and opened his eyes mid-roll, and stared back at the Hylian. That normally warm, if not mischievous, look of his was replaced entirely with something cold. Something akin to annoyance and another thing that Link, at the moment, could not simply say with absolute certainty.

What he could say, with absolute certainty, was Guybrush was trying his patience with all of this.

“The hell was that?” Link asked.

“I’m loo–”

“Don’t.” He stopped him. “Don’t be smart with me, Guybrush. You know entirely well what I’m referring to.”

Guybrush stared at him and momentarily looked away, his brows furrowing with clear annoyance. 

“What’s there to say?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out after Graham received the wrong end of the sword from you.” Link said. 

“It’s a foam bat–”

“That doesn’t change how you absolutely thrashed him the first two rounds and then, randomly, threw it in the last where suddenly you didn’t have either of your hands before storming off.”

“Excellent recap, still missing that something in your story telling but hey, what do I know, right? You said it yourself to stop being smart and considering I’m just the bumbling idiot of the group I’m lucky to say even one coherent sentence.” Guybrush snarked before hopping off the crate. 

“Hey, where are you going? We’re not done here!” Link called out.

“Hiding myself so I don’t make either of you look stupid.” Guybrush waved. “Or maybe off to destroy something because I’m super clumsy, who knows.”

It was Link’s turn to stare in annoyance. He could feel his eye just barely twitching but his anger outweighed his irritation as he sprinted and blocked Guybrush from walking away, shoving the pirate with all his might and forcing Guybrush to stumble back in confusion.

“What the–”

“No!” Link shouted. “I don’t know what has gotten into you, but you are not normally such a bitter cynical jerk!”

“On a good day.”

“Guybrush, for fu–” Link snapped but he stopped himself, taking in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. He was angry. Infuriated, even. But he was equally stubborn and determined. Opening his eyes again, he glared at Guybrush. “I’m gonna ask you something, and I am begging you to be serious with me instead of being like this. Can you do that? Please?”

“Do I have a choice?” Guybrush crossed his arms.

“The other choice is I beat the ever loving crap out of you until you tell me what’s wrong and you and I both know that when it comes to sword fighting or hand to hand combat, between myself and Graham, I can absolutely whoop you. And that is not an empty threat and you know that.”

Guybrush scoffed, but Link knew that the pirate agreed. The two would spar from time to time when there was a feeling of annoyance or frustration with Graham acting, usually, as a referee to stop the two before it went too far.

He shifted his weight and stared at Link. The chill was gone, but the anger was not.

“Shoot.”

“Punch or words?”

“And you say that I’m being smart.” Guybrush rolled his eyes. “Words.”

Link bit back a scoff of his own and placed his hands on his hips. “Are you stressed because of the festivities that you’re acting out like this?”

“No.” Guybrush looked at the crowd outside the alleyway, his lips tight but he eventually shook his head. “No. Not entirely.”

“Okay. Did Graham do anything to make you mad?”

At that, Guybrush looked at him confused. “Graham?”

“Yes? Considering the poor guy got the absolute beating of his life at your hand.” Link gestured towards the crowd. 

The confusion went back to annoyance. “He won though.”

“You threw that match.”

“At the end of the day, what really matters is that I get to be the performative moron to the amusement of everyone around and making sure others look better. Because even the mere idea that, hey, I might actually be good at something can only and exclusively be chalked up to dumb luck.”

“Who ever said that?” 

Guybrush pointed to the town, his expression not waning in the slightest. “The masses. And they said it very clearly when I was winning.”

“No… did they?” Link blinked, trying to recall when he winced. 

They did. And very loudly at that.

Link was too focused on the two of them, wanting to cheer for both of his best friends equally when he saw something in Guybrush shift for the worst. That playful expression that could potentially double as cocky evolved into a frown and the grip he had on his make-shift sword got tighter if the whites on his knuckles were anything indicative. He watched as Guybrush lunged and in three strong swings managed to knock Graham harshly to the floor and send his weapon flying.

But the archer pushed through that pain, shaking his head and laughing nervously as he gripped his weapon again, ready for round two, but the second the bell struck, Guybrush bolted towards Graham who could barely deflect his strikes. Link could faintly make out what Graham was saying through the shouts and cheers, but he knew it was Graham asking Guybrush to ease up… that he isn’t as skilled at the sword as the other two blonds were. But it fell on deaf ears as Guybrush pulled Link’s signature spin and knocked Graham flat once more.

He shouted for Guybrush to stop, to try and reel him back. Maybe he was trapped in a memory, maybe the crowd shouting while he was in the center was reminding him of his time trapped… whatever it was, something was going on and Graham was tragically taking the brunt while Link could only stand in horror, as no matter how much he tried to push himself to the front, to rush the stage, the people kept shoving him back and blocking his way.

Blocking him as they continued to roar and shout how Graham needed to get up, slam the dirty pirate. He only won those two rounds because he cheated. Because dumb-luck was on his side.

Because Graham is a knight, and he is kind and good hearted and brave.

Because Guybrush is nothing but a smelly, good for nothing, chaos bringing, pirate.

Link saw something in Guybrush break as his grip on his sword lessened significantly. The bell rang, and in two hits, Guybrush fell down and his sword clattered. 

Technically, Guybrush won two out of the three rounds… he should be the victor. But the crowd cheered Graham and the host dubbed him the victor of the challenge while the audience booed the loser that was Guybrush. 

Link watched Guybrush stand up, give a faux bow with that cynical smirk instead of his warm one, and turned to leave the stage, his expression dark and unkind as he beelined to the alleyway.

He heard Graham shouting Guybrush’s name, trying to push past the crowd to reach him, wanting to talk, yet the sea wouldn’t permit. But Link had had enough, shouldering roughly the people as he went to the stage, gripped Graham’s wrist and pulled him somewhere else, somewhere quieter. 

Link didn’t need to ask what was wrong if the prickle of tears in the corner of Graham’s eyes was any indicator. Especially so when Graham looked at him and asked– begged, rather, that Link go to Guybrush first as he tries to think what he did to anger the pirate.

“You didn’t do anything.” Link answered. “You know that.”

“Maybe, yeah… but he’s hurt.” Graham wiped his eye with his arm.

“So are you. And you’re better at talking… the both of you are.”

“Yeah. But I don’t think he wants to see me at the moment. Link, please? I’ll be fine, I just…” Graham looked at him. “Please?”

Link sighed and nodded. “Fine. Don’t move though, alright?”

“My ribs wouldn’t want me moving either.” He scoffed.

The Hylian winced… Guybrush very clearly didn’t hold back those two rounds. With a pat on Graham’s shoulder, he ran towards the alleyway where he saw Guybrush headed for.

Which brought him back to the initial point: the people, rather loudly, said how they felt about him. And it was far from kind or understanding.

“Guybrush–” Link frowned.

“No no! Please! Don’t mend my ego. After all, a clown can always heal with time.” Guybrush laughed. “And I’m just the star example of one, right? Always bouncing back from the mockery or a ridicule or an insult… it’s my specialty. Everyone always says that if they’re not pointing out every single flaw.”

“It is, but that doesn’t make you a clown, it means you’re resilient.” He countered. “And why are you letting a bunch of no names dictate who you are?”

“Because everyone said it for so long and, really nobody cares or wants to hear my words or thoughts.” He scoffed.

“Uh, hi and screw you?” Link glared. “That’s actually extremely insulting considering I’m here for you. I was sent on this entire quest to find you. And I’m here now to hear what’s troubling you because I’m worried about you. Graham and I are both worried about you.”

Guybrush briefly looked away.

“They can say whatever but Graham and I never agreed with them. Ever. And you know that.”

“Two–

“Four.” He corrected. “Graham, me, Winslow, and Elaine.”

He stared at the sky, flipping back and forth internally between wanting to concede and fight. 

“Alright. Four people against an entire town in just one place out of many is hardly a convincing argument.” Guybrush huffed.

“Since when did you care so much about what others think?” Link shifted his argument, realizing that trying to repeat himself that Guybrush’s view of himself was wrong was clearly a ‘one ear out the other’ conversation. “Up until now you had never let what anyone said get to you, or at least get to you like this. And I refuse to drop this until I, at the very least, can understand this mood switch.”

“It’s a front, Link!” Guybrush shouted. “The truth of the matter is, all of this? That whole laughing things off and pretending nothing anyone says is getting to me? It’s just one giant front because the alternative hurts way more! I’d rather people think nothing gets to me and I shrug things off and don’t have a care in the world instead of knowing that it is in-freaking-furiating to hear what they all say about me day in and day out. And I’ve had to hear it all since day one!”

Link stood still as Guybrush paced slightly, opening and closing his hands as his breath got heavy.

“And you want to know the kicker? I kinda believe it because if everyone has been saying then it has to be true, right? Everyone is coming to the same conclusion, it has to be true, right? I mean, heh, I already believe what they all said, but hearing it outloud is so unbelievably painful.” Guybrush laughed bitterly. 

“What of me then?” Link asked. “You know just as well as I do that I have the same problem… of the masses saying one thing and me believing– wanting to believe in something else. You told me, repeatedly I should add, that it doesn’t matter what others think. It’s my actions at the end of the day and what I choose to do.”

Guybrush shook his head. “The difference is what I said doesn’t match who I am. Not a single thing about the actual me either of you have seen. You really believe I got everything together? I don’t. I still panic and stumble and honestly, I’m even shocked that even four of you still think I got it together. The people clocked it in–”

“Will you stop that already?!” Link snapped, startling the pirate as he jabbed a harsh finger into his chest. “THAT’S the front! This whole ‘I’m a clown’ and stuff is the front because, hey, this might come off as a shocker, but I know you pretty freaking well by now as does Graham! Who, by the way, insisted I come and help you because he knew you were hurt! And before you even so much as quip about how only one person cares, know that I would’ve come no matter what because that’s what friends do, you absolute jackass!”

Guybrush opened his mouth but closed it again, his jaw clenching tightly as he looked away. 

But it was Link who snapped his fingers forcing the pirate to look at him once more, fury burning brightly in his eyes.

“I mean it when I say we actually care and we’re friends. Hell, I still think we’re friends irregardless of all this emo nonsense you’re throwing at me. You’re upset? Fine, be upset! But you have four shoulders to lean on to help you get back up because you, Guybrush, are freaking resilient.” Link stepped closer, shoving a stronger jab of his finger to Guybrush who found himself stumbling backwards until his back hit a wall. 

“We want to help because we care, irregardless of what those guys or that infuriating voice in your head said. You want to believe it? Go ahead. But believe me when I say you’re a lot stronger than you’re giving yourself credit for, and no matter what you do or say, it’s not going to shake either me or Graham off from being here for you. So stop it with this lone wolf crap and let us help you!”

Link panted, looking away for a moment and trying to compose himself as Guybrush stood there dumbfounded, taking in those words and blinking in confusion.

“Wow.” Guybrush managed to mutter. “I don’t think anyone has told me off like that in years… or ever, really.”

“...Elaine didn’t?”

“Once… but not with that level of intensity that you just had.”

The two fell quiet again and both of them let out a small chuckle.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you curse out that much.” Guybrush said, a small smile on his face. “It’s kinda startling.”

“I don’t think I ever did until I met you.” Link admitted, also having a small smile but looking at the pirate. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m… still upset, I think.” He answered, looking around as if to pin the feeling. “I… I don’t know, really. But I know I feel really bad now for what I did to the both of you. Especially Graham.”

Link nodded. “Like I said, you can be upset. I’m not going to fault you and neither will Graham. But I do think you owe Graham an apology for beating the hell out of him.”

“Yeah… yeah I do.” He sighed, pushing himself off the wall and rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean to but… still.”

“What happened?” Link asked, seeing Guybrush having slowly come back to his senses. “One minute you two were joking about competing against one another and the next you went off.”

Guybrush frowned and placed his hands on his hips, shaking his head slightly. “I… it’s like I said. The people and their words, it just… it got to me. And maybe it was lingering thoughts of Big Whoop or something else, but hearing repeatedly how I’m basically beneath people, and that I deserve the ridicule and the mockery and being compared to you and Graham… it got to me. Not an excuse, I know, but…”

“No, it makes sense.” Link conceded. “You’re not really one to take center stage and get attention. Even though the whole Mighty Pirate thing would say otherwise.”

“Forgot the trademark.”

“My curse.”

The two chuckled again and sighed. Link looked at Guybrush, seeing the upset expression still on his face and tapped his finger in thought before sighing once again.

“I know we’re both not um… physical types but…” Link sheepishly smirked and opened his arms, “need a hug?”

Guybrush stared, let out a laugh and shook his head. He walked over and the two hugged one another for a while before both of them broke out of it.

“Let's go meet up with Graham.” Link said.

“Think he’s going to hug or whack me with the foam bat as retribution?”

“Well, I’m not sure the order, but probably both. Either way, we’ll figure that out when we get there.”

“Heh. Fair.”

[glorious-spoon]

Second-Guessing [9-1-1 | Buck/Eddie | 1/1]

Rating: Teen Wordcount: ~1000 Warnings: None Other Tags: Pre-relationship, Emotional hurt/comfort, Friendship, Episode tag - 6x13 Mixed Feelings

-

“Do you think I’m bad at sex?”

Eddie barks out a startled laugh at his ceiling, then straightens up. This is not, unfortunately, the weirdest way Buck has ever opened a phone call with him, but it’s definitely up there. “What?”

“That call the other day, you know, the lady with the vibrator—”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Eddie,” Buck whines. “This is important!”

“Is it, really?”

“Eighty percent. He said that the article said eighty percent of people report being unsatisfied. Do you know how many women I’ve slept with? Eighty percent of that is, like, a lot. Okay? And I was doing some research—on a first time hookup, did you know that only forty percent of women even have an orgasm at all? So if I do the math on that—”

“Buck.”

Buck lets out a deep sigh that crackles down the phone line. “I’m being an idiot about this, aren’t I?”

“Nah. Well, I mean, kinda. But it’s okay.”

“Is it, though? Like—” there’s a rustle on the other end of the line. It’s easy to imagine Buck right now, flopped out across his bed because the couch his parents bought him is a bona fide torture device. In his sweatpants, probably, his hair still damp from the shower. He lets out another sigh, then says, “You know, Bobby was saying—when I was with Taylor, Bobby said that the problem was that I never talk to my partners, that I don’t know how to communicate, and that’s why my relationships always turn into catastrophes.”

“I don’t think that’s quite what he was saying. And Taylor—”

“I know. You hate her guts.”

Eddie snorts. “I was gonna say that it’s different, in a long term relationship.”

“Right, but. I haven’t historically had a lot of success with those.”

“Relationships don’t work out sometimes. A lot of the time.”

There’s silence for a moment. It’s not just Taylor hanging over the conversation now; Ana is there too. And Shannon.

Sex with Ana was always stilted, awkward in a way that he told himself at the time was just the newness of it all. Just a new person, a new body to learn, just Eddie being rusty when it came to literally any form of physical intimacy. He and Shannon were each other's firsts, so of course neither of them knew what they were doing to start with, and what they learned they learned together. By the end of it, sex was the only part of their relationship that actually worked. Beyond that—

He doesn’t really have a lot of perspective to offer Buck, is the thing. Even setting aside the fact that he’s not sure he can give an objective analysis of the sexual history of the guy he’s in love with.

So there’s that.

“It’s just…” Buck sounds quieter now, almost miserable, and it tugs at Eddie's heartstrings despite the absurdity of this whole conversation. “That was like. The one thing I knew I was good at. You know? Everything else, sure, my life was a mess, I made a lot of dumb choices and messed up a lot of relationships and got myself fired, and—but at least I knew how to, you know, make somebody feel good. Except maybe I didn’t after all. And if I wasn’t even any good at that, then—”

“Buck,” Eddie interrupts again. Gently, this time. He firmly squashes the unhelpful little voice in the back of his head that wants to ask for a hands-on demonstration. Buck sounds freaked out enough that he might actually take Eddie up on it, and Eddie is… really not ready to cope with that possibility. “You’re spiraling.”

Another silence. Then: “I called them. Some of them.”

Good grief. “Your hookups?”

“Yeah—is that a disrespectful way to talk about them? I mean—anyway, yeah. The ones I still have phone numbers for, I called them. Most of them didn’t want to talk to me.”

“Shocking,” Eddie deadpans.

Buck laughs, which is what he was going for. “Shut up.”

“So? What was the verdict?”

He regrets asking the moment the words are out of his mouth, but he doesn't take it back.

“Uh,” Buck says, still laughing a little. “Of the ones I actually got a hold of? Yes, yes, probably, no, who the hell are you, I thought I blocked your number, yes, no, I don't remember, yes.”

“More yeses than nos,” Eddie offers.

“Unless they were lying to make me feel better,” Buck counters triumphantly.

“Buck. If someone called you up out of the blue after years of radio silence to ask if you had an orgasm when you slept together, would you lie about it to spare their feelings?”

Buck is quiet for a minute. “Yeah, okay, that was kind of an insane thing to do, huh.”

“A little. Yeah.”

He can hear the fondness in his own voice and is helpless to mute it. Though he's honestly not really trying that hard. Buck deserves to know that he's loved, even when he's being ridiculous. Maybe especially then.

“I just worry. You know, that all the shit I thought I knew about myself—that maybe it’s not really true after all. And if that’s the case then who the hell am I, anyway?”

“Feels like this maybe isn’t actually about whether or not you’re good in bed,” Eddie offers, and bites his teeth on anything else he could say about that. About finding out that maybe the person you thought you were was just a carefully painted mask over the messy, tender reality underneath. He could offer Buck some truth of his own, but he doesn’t. It doesn’t feel like the right time for it.

That, or he’s a coward. He’s working on it, though.

“Maybe not. I guess. Eddie, I…” Buck trails off.

“What?” Eddie asks, when a few moments of silence have passed.

“Nothing,” Buck says. He laughs quietly; Eddie can conjure up the shape of his smile and the crinkles at the corners of his eyes as easily as breathing. “Just. Thanks for taking my call.”

“Of course. Always.”

For a little while, they just breathe together across the miles between them as night falls gently over Los Angeles. Then Buck says softly, “Come over tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Eddie says back, just as soft. There’s nothing new about the invitation, but it feels new, somehow, anyway. Either way, the answer is the same as it’s always been. “Yeah, okay.”

[rnakamura22]

Till Death Do us Part

Minors DNI +18

As you packed up your bags after class ended , you overheard a few girls talking about a new song of a certain K-pop idol group.

“It’s so cool…” “ I make my own rules, wish for the forbidden…” “I am not a doll…”

You scoff to yourself. What a joke! As if these idols know what it is like! You doubted it. If something’s forbidden, you shouldn’t touch it! That’s what makes it forbidden in the first place! Why the hell would you put yourself in danger? And craving for freedom? When not thinking about the circumstances? If the other force was so powerful that you would be crushed to death if you disobey? The thought itself shuddered you.

You walked back home, which was a total pain. Your brother Ran and Rindo, was one of the most feared gang members in Tokyo. Being their litter sister had more difficulties than advantages. Your two brothers harbored little love for you as a sister, but more love as a commodity. You absolutely had no freedom or the chance to make your own choices. Only the Heavens knew what would come if you disobeyed. The meetings with gang members who looked at you in every lewd way possible was absolute torture. It was a miracle that you were still here, not flayed alive.

You also had to deal with jealous girls who were being played by your two brothers. You were very close to screaming at the girls who approached your brothers that they were all idiots who were two steps away from completely ruining themselves and their dignity. Also, you also harbored little feelings toward them as a family since you viewed them more as a monster rather than a brother.

The girls at school envied you for your beauty and having a lone wolf personality, which did appeal to some people yet never made a move on you due to your two brothers. Despite looking like you had no problems in your life, you were always afraid of your two brothers, the trouble of gang members, and feeling like you didn’t have a place that you belonged to. All the more reasons why you hated the K-Pop songs that the girls in your class liked. It just seemed so fake and overused!

The summer of you being 15, Ran and Rindo introduced you to Izana Kurokawa. A dashing man, you admitted. Amethyst eyes, silky sliver white hair. The bad boy vibe that every girl might fall for. Except you.

Izana adored you, but in a fearful way. He would take you home on his motorcycle when he has nothing better to do. You were invited to his apartment when he was in the mood. Your first time was taken by him. He was kind when he wanted to be. He promised every time after sex that when you become 16, you will marry him. “I love you, (y/n), you’re so pretty. I really wish time would fly faster so I can marry you.” That was his phrase used every time.

But he had a horrible temper that couldn’t be controlled. Things were thrown, crashed, and sometimes, Izana brutally hit you with his knuckles where other people couldn’t see. His two-faced personality was getting out of control by the minute, and you were afraid that someday, you would get killed. Kakucho, Izana’s second in command was trying to help you when things were rough. But he couldn’t draw the line because of absolute loyalty to Izana. Ran and Rindo were in a good mood ever since you and Izana started to hang out. Even though you knew, Izana went out with other girls too and you were nothing but a toy.

Having nowhere to run, that was when you met him. Takashi Mistuya. He was handsome, kind, good at cooking and sewing, a gentleman. He was nothing like the other gang members you ever met. Your curfew was very strict and Izana was there in your home most of the time. Your home had become absolute hell, and you spend your time on the nearby park's bench, staring at the people and the atmosphere.

"What's wrong? It's not safe for cute girls like you to be all alone!

One look into his lilac eyes was all it needed.

"Same goes for you, the girls wouldn't leave you alone." you said.

From that day on, you talked with Mitsuya on the bench until the time of curfew approached. He was from a nearby middle school, and you talked with him for what seemed like forever.

"Why do you stay out here so late?"

"My...brothers...they're strict..." you lied. It was Izana, he restricted your freedom while himself being with other girls. You didn't hate him, but you really wished he would get bored with you and leave.

"They have to be...a cute girl like you would make your brothers overprotective...I bet my little sisters would say something like that when they get older!" Mistuya laughed.

You secretly went to his house to meet Luna and Mana when the weekend where Ran, Rindo, and Izana were out on a gang meeting. Luna and Mana both greeted you with open arms.

"Are you big bro's girlfriend?" " She's pretty! We like pretty ladies!" "Hey, knock it off you two!"

You cooked with Mitsuya, helping him with his chores and doing homework together in secret.

“I really hope…. I could see you again.”

“Me too, I hope I can…”

You and Mitsuya both wanted to say the magic word. The unstable relationship between you and him. The spaces you both wanted to fill up and run into each other's arms.

Then one day, you got home to find Izana relaxing on the couch.

"Izana...you're here."　"You've been avoiding me and going out late. Ran and Rindo were both worried about you."

You wanted to scream "Yeah, right!" Ran and Rindo both cared for you as a commodity. As well as Izana, in your mind. If he did love you, why would he go out with other girls? The thought itself disgusted you.

“There's a big battle coming up soon... when we win, I'll create the biggest criminal organization in Japan. Let's get married after that, OK?" Izana said with a sweet smile as he came up closer and hugged you, his arms wrapped around your waist, making it feel like two snakes were slithering up your body.

"Thanks...please don't do anything too dangerous and hurt yourselves OK?" you said and lightly patted Izana on the back.

The next day, you went to the usual place to meet Mitsuya but you discovered something horrifying. Mitsuya’s head was tied with a white roll bandage.

“ What happened!” You ran up to him and lightly touched his head in horror.

“Yeah, I got attacked by Tenjiku yesterday.. it’s nothing” Mitsuya lightly smiled.　

A horrific theory invaded your mind. You wanted to deny it, but you had to face it.

"Mitsuya.. are you in Toman?"

"Yeah, what about it?" Mitsuya smiled in the way you loved.

"I'm.. I'm so sorry... No... it can't be.... " You dropped on the floor, your hand covering your face.

"What's wrong?" Mitsuya lowered his legs, looking worried.

"My brothers...they're Ran and Rindo Haitani."

"What? Your brothers are the Haitanis?"

"They're in Tenjiku... I’m　so sorry...."

”"It's not your fault...I'm not blaming you for anything." Mitsuya lightly smiled.

"Thank you for saying that Mitsuya. I.."

"Wait, let me say it first. I like you, I really like you. Please go out with me."

"I feel the same way. I really like you Mitsuya. You're the first guy I ever really liked. "

You two held each other in your arms and kissed for the first time. It was a kiss that helped you escape from the cruel world.

You told him about your relationship with Izana and your two brothers.

"Kurokawa... that bastard. I've never met him, but he sounds like an asshole. No, he just proved himself an asshole. How could he cheat when he has someone cute and kind like you?" Mitsuya scowled.

"Thank you for saying that... it means a lot." You smiled sadly as you kissed him again.

"I want you to held your heart within Toman. I dedicated myself to Toman."

"....Yeah.... I will. Taka-kun. " You looked to Mitsuya with eyes that had made a decision.

The next day, you heard of Mitsuya and the commanders of Toman attacked by members of Tenjiku.

As you ran to the hospital where Mitsuya was in, you met a blue haired guy who's hair was shaved off.

"Aren't you Haitani's sister?" the boy said angrily.

"Yeah... how's Mitsuya? Is he Ok..." you trembled and asked.

"You came here to spy on him didn't you!! Taka-chan and Smiley-kun are both fatally injured! You approached him to spy on Toman!" The boy yelled.

"No, please!!You got it all wrong, listen.."

"Get out of here!! Don't get close to Taka-chan ever again!!" the boy yelled and you had no choice but to leave from Mitsuya's hospital room.

When you went home, Izana was there putting on a scarlet red tailcoat uniform of Tenjiku spelled with black letters.

"You're back, y/n."

"Hi.."

"We're about to have a big showdown battle, come with us. You'll get to see your darling Mitsuya crushed to shreds."

Izana didn't face you, but his tone was bitter. You dropped your bag in shock.

"Wha...

"You went to see him in the hospital, right? One of the guys told me they saw you leave the hospital. Are you already together? Did you fuck him like the slut you are?"

You said nothing as Izana faced you and cupped your face with his hands harshly. There was a dark glow in his amethyst eyes and his teeth was clenched.

"Come." Izana grabbed your arm harshly and pushed you into the back seat of the car, making you feel like a criminal about to be taken into execution.

When you arrived at the port, your two brothers Ran and Rindo were waiting for you.

"Hey, the rat appears!! Did you already fuck the officers of Toman to let you join their side?"

"Or did you spill the beans about Tenjiku and stayed here to be a spy for Toman? Did you let them gangbang you?"

Ran and Rindo both taunted you. You couldn't take it anymore and looked to the ground.

"Cat got your tongue, little sis? Or did you let Mitsuya kiss you?" Ran approached to you in a fearful way.

"Please.... Just drop it already!! " you spoke in a small tone.

"Why did it have to be Mitsuya?" asked Rindo.

"He's the first guy I ever really liked.... I love him!"

"Bold of you to propose a love for a man who's on the team your boyfriend's about to destroy." Izana came up from the behind and grabbed you by the shoulder. He was smiling but you felt the shudders like you always did, this time more than ever.

He placed his face on your head and wrapped you with both of his arms, slithering under your blouse. You felt the sensation of a snake slithering your body, this time one step away from biting you with his poisonous fangs.

"Izana...you never loved me. You always cheated on me and went out with other girls. You sometimes brutally hit me or threw things about me. I was never anything but a toy to you, weren't I? Do you think I would love someone like that?" You slipped out of Izana's arms and backed away from your brothers and Izana.

Izana thought for a moment and smiled cynically.

"Then what was I to you? A dick you couldn't stand but had to fuck because of your brothers who treated you like trash? And you couldn't run away? I've decided. I'm going to crush Toman, and I'm going to destroy Mitsuya."

The battle started and Mitsuya did came even though he was injured. When he met eyes with you, held tightly in Izana's arms, he gave off a complex expression.

In the end, Tenjiku won.

You couldn't hide your hopelessness. You felt like the arm that was holding you was a chain you couldn't cut off.

Izana pulled you into one of the warehouses, and threw you to the ground.

"You have to be punished, y/n. We have to wait for a little bit, the special guest is yet to come." said coldly, as he started to rip your clothes.

You heard a thump, and turned your face only to see a brutally beaten Mitsuya on the ground, dragged by the office members of Tenjiku.

"We have Mitsuya as the guest of this strip show, so you could never think about cheating with another man again."

"y/n...!..." You heard Mitsuya's anguished cry of your name.

"Please don't look Taka-kun..." All you can do was trying to wiggle so you could escape.

"Hey now, the main star can't run～."

"Think twice before running, y/n. If you try, your lame ass Romeo's life are going to go. " the voice of Ran echoed from your right ear, Rindo from the left.

"You admitted you fucked me because you're afraid of your brothers, right? So, fuck with them to get along, it's my duty to fix my girlfriend's family problems, as your real boyfriend."

"Stop...release y/n..." Mitsuya's cries echoed, right after that his painful scream at the officers kicking his back.

"No, Please stop Izana! I'll do anything, anything! Please!! Stop hurting Taka-kun!!! Please!" You screamed in a woeful way, your blouse and skirt torn off, almost bare naked.

"Hmm...No, entertain us like the slut you are." Izana smiled, making it feel like the devil himself was in the warehouse.

From there, you did not remember clearly. You only remembered your brother's vulgar breaths, Mitsuya's anguished cries and pleas, and you screaming.

"Feel better now, princess? Know what you can say to save you?" said izana, as he picked up your face with his hands while crouching himself on the ground.

"Izana... I'm sorry, I was stupid, I...love you." you pleaded. You could not think of anything else that would save Mitsuya.

"What about Mitsuya?" smiled Izana as he taunted you.

"I don't know him...never met him.." you looked him and his eyes and pleaded.

"Well, you heard what she said, Mitsuya. Looks like your Juliet never existed. Take him away, don't you ever get close to y/n again. I think one hit with a gun would be merciful for a execution, don't you think?"

You startled in shock.

"N..No, Izana, please...please..."

"What's wrong, you said you never met him or knew him. It wouldn't hurt right? Let's get you home and clean up, don't ever let me down again, OK?" Izana smiled as he picked you up bridal style, sealing your freedom and your lover's fate.

"...Yes, Izana." you had no choice but to let yourself go in Izana's arms, pretending not to hear the gunshot.

From that day on, Toman and Tenjiku clashed together to only make a gigantic criminal organization in the end, as Izana said.

He kept his promise and married you when you turned 16, giving birth to his child when you turned 17. Your job was to obey Izana's every command, sitting pretty looking like a porcelain doll for people to gaze and awe over.

Romeo had been long dead outside the warehouse many years ago, Juliet made into a doll for her master, carrying a boy who possessed all of his father's genes both inside and outside and none of yours.

You could not think, and you could not speak. Your heart had been dead and killed long ago in that warehouse along with Romeo.

If only... was all you could dream. If only. If only. That was your only thought as you stepped in the large bathtub full of lukewarm water. As you felt yourself sinking hearing the distant voice of the baby boy's voice crying, you begin to see him. Your Romeo's handsome smile, his sweet voice, his body. You ran up to him and embraced him, which he did the same smiling with all his might.

"I love you, Taka-kun."

"I love you,y/n."

You had managed to meet Mitsuya again, this time without any obstacles. As you kissed him and he kissed you back in the underwater heaven's palace, you felt happiness for the first time in your life.

"Romeo and Juliet...they do get their happy ever after, don't you think so Taka-kun?"

"I do y/n.....you're finally mine where no one will take you away."

"I won't go away. I'll stay with you forever."

As the two looked at each other and smiled, you said the same words together.

"" Till Death do us part.""

[pourrrrthetea]

Sweet, you do get my ask. This is going to be lengthy. I'm an silent reader because this fandom is crazy, but it's still fun sometimes to see all the theories out there. I do still support him, but I agree that the Doja thing was off putting.

I would like to state to that I am in no ways trying to defend him, or his choices, and I'm hyper aware I do not know this man whatsoever.

This is just some things I have observe, and my opinion on the matter because I wouldn't mind other insight or giving insight to others.

First and foremost, I hope everyone is well and happy holidays to all.

The first thing I want to say, that Joe strikes me as someone who is a bit insecure with himself and goes for people who he knows are into him as a safety blanket. I once read, take this with a grain of salt, but I saw someone say they knew him in high school, and he wasn't a ladies' man and that he would latch on to anyone who showed him attention. In my school days, I was the same way sometimes and it's because I was that friend who never got noticed by boys, and it made me extremely insecure.

I also get the feel he's a guy that does want a serious relationship, but has been through possibly shit relationships, nor does he have the time due to his raise in fame. I don't think it's a player move, or lazy to take girls to the same places. I think the relationships or whatever they were weren't serious enough for him to open up and take them to somewhere actually special, so he took them to the usual spots. I mean, if I didn't feel a relationship was going anywhere, I wouldn't take the person to special spots either. You're not going to open up and give insight to special meaning places or put in effort if the relationship isn't special.

From what's everyone said, I think Joe is actually kind and a sweet guy. I think that's also his downfall, which is where I wish people would give him a break with being seen with her. Here me out, I understand the reasoning of why you want to drop him for associating with her. Even I was like, what the fuck are you doing you idiot. At the same time, he strikes me as someone who will get to know someone for himself despite the noise surrounding the person.

I hope that makes sense, but let's also take a moment to say that haven't we all been there? In life, everyone has at least one experience with a person who isn't the greatest individual, but no one can tell us otherwise until we learn for ourselves. I think he fell into that trap. Rather it was all PR, or real, he gave her a chance because when they met, she was funny and on top he knew she was into him.

Due to his nature of being, and insecure he fell down the rabbit hole. I think now he has learned his lesson, but I agree with all of you it's a waiting game to see if they are actual, WITH PICTURE PROOF, seen together again. As far as the afterparty scene, Joe and Pedro both stated they had to be up early for filming, and she arrived at 2 in the morning like everyone has been saying. Personally, I think they didn't cross paths, but who actually knows.

Another downfall to this man though is his kindness because I do believe she will try to grasp onto anything and if she comes up at a place, he will exchange hello's and how are you. We could get pictures from that, and even if we do, I wouldn't judge anything unless we see anything hardcore proof. For example, a full-blown kissing or something in that manner.

I don't think he's a bad guy, and I do believe he has a good heart. I am hyper aware I can be completely wrong on all fronts because I do not know this man at all. Unfortunately, a kind heart can get you in as much hot water as being a douchebag these days.

I just hope some people lay up on him because he's human and at the end of the day, we really don't know what has happen or why, but I do get why people are so easy to cut him off because Doja is awful.

Hopefully, he's learned his lesson and moves forward. In any regards, Joe, honey, standards. LMAO

Ok, thanks for coming to my long as ted talk. Have a good day, xo.

Opinions?

[soul-dwelling]

The same week they cave to a fucking orange fascist over This Week on ABC, Disney also tells LGBTQ+ kids to go back into the closet:

"Hey, Dwells, it's been almost two months, can you lighten up a bit? I thought this was a fan site--"

Oh, you want something connected to Soul Eater?

Fine.

Here's something I wrote back in April 2022, worrying about how Ohkubo's bullshit was going to lead to this kind of awfulness that Disney is now doing:

No wonder we lost Roe. No wonder we had dumb-fuck boys and men after the 2024 election saying, "Your body, my choice." No wonder sexism and racism helped once again elevate the dumbest fucking men out there--because heaven fucking forbid women, especially non-white women, especially non-white women who are infinitely more qualified than this fucking orange toad of a man, ever get fucking elected President in this goddamned country.

Real classy, too, that Disney is somehow fine putting Fire Force on their shitty streaming service (granted, if you also have Hulu) but "oh no, an out trans kid" in a family/children's animated series is going too far.

And it's not even the first time this year this has happened--see also Moon Girl, another bit of self-censorship post-2024 election, to keep beating up on LGBTQ+ people and get a pat on the head from fucking Nazis:

Pop culture and art shouldn't have to be tools for something else: ideally, art is the end in and of itself, it shouldn't have to have a cause to change the world, it just has to exist, the platonic ideal of "look at them, doing nothing, just lazing around--so beautiful, so perfect." That would be great, art for art's sake. But you fucking idiots who sat out on this election don't let us have that idealized world. Of course everything can have political potential, "everything is political," etc. But you fucking weirdos keep making everything political, including people just living their lives because you can't mind your own damn business.

And yeah, corporations are not your friends--no shit. It is dispiriting to see how quickly corporations cave to fascism, but not surprising: fascism is literally the combination of government and corporations. I don't know what else to say about that aside from what I said in my blog post linked above: we need to divorce art from toxic creators, we need to divorce art from corporations, we need more fan works--these are your characters now, have fun, make something that treats those characters well.

It sure is nice when art inspires change for the better in human advancement and progressive policies. I'm not trans, I'm cis, and one of the biggest things I have whined about with zero standing to whine about because, again, cis, is that I want more trans characters front and center in the stories I read and watch, not just allegory. I'm sick of allegory: I want those characters. Characters, people who are right there, not just symbolism but the characters and their lives in that story. It's not always going to be written perfectly, sometimes that really good story is literally just the trans character living their life and doing the things every single person does (wake up, eat, drink, do some activities, engage with other people, go back to sleep). But it's not enough to have only a trans allegory. And, sure, it's not enough to just stop at having trans storylines, and it's not even enough to just have trans characters because there are still the pitfalls that come with any writing of a character where, sure, you may screw up unintentionally or inadvertently tokenize the character. But it's always a start, a start is always good, a start is moving in the right direction. It can always be better, we should be striving to do better, not handcuffing ourselves and self-censoring. I know it was already obvious, but getting our stories out of a corporate machine isn't ideal, and I don't have a very good answer beyond, "Go read someone's independent work, and provide whatever financial support you can to them."

Meanwhile, this anti-trans shit, thanks to the misogynists, racists, and other bigots in 2024 fucking over my country with rightwing shit, is going to keep sending people into the closet and getting a lot of people hurt.

Jesus Tap-Dancing Christ, I did not get into Soul Eater with Crona, a character who eschews a gender binary, right there to then be told by the dumbest people online, in politics, and in corporate speak, "Hey, this is going way too out there with gender, let's rein this in--or else."

I didn't start this fan site more than a decade ago to now suddenly flip my values and recant what I stood for. I'm not going to change from a liberal, left-leaning, progressive, or whatever you want to call it person and now say, "Actually, Crona wasn't that significant a character--forget everything I wrote about on my fan site over the last decade." I'm serious: I think now, in 2024, Crona would be a step too far for these morons--these knuckle-dragging dumb motherfuckers would say Crona is going too far.

(No wonder Disney also screwed over The Owl House: it wasn't just the LGBTQ+ characters, it was the literal Soul Eater poster on Luz's bedroom wall.)

These dumb motherfuckers are already banning Soul Eater in public schools and public libraries. (So, you dumb-as-fuck rightwing manga fans, great job shooting yourself in the foot: your favorite stories are getting banned, too--you voted for this dumbness, you stupid fucks.)

So, how long will it be that banning Soul Eater isn't because of violence or nudity but because of the gender identity?

And to wrap up my rambling with one last diatribe...Those people who didn't vote for Harris and Democrats? THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.

[kitkatopinions]

If you don't like the choices a writer/content creator makes for a character, you're not obligated to hate the character. And although you can't argue that it isn't 'canon,' you don't have to only see the character through the lens of the bad thing you don't like. If you think the writer/content creator didn't make a character change or character arc convincing, you don't have to pretend that it was believable, and base your perception of the character off of something you thought was badly done or hard to believe.

I'm gonna give an example from the Office. The character of Andy Bernard started out as a meant-to-be douchey, meant-to-be annoying character, and then went to anger management and when he came back started being portrayed as more likeable, though still very flawed. This continued on for seasons, but then in the last season (though arguably starting with the season eight episode 'Welcome Party') Andy started being written as a bad boss early Michael Scott style who his coworkers didn't like. I did not like that direction, thought it was unnecessary despite some funny moments and good plot points coming from it, it sometimes wasn't done very well, and I felt like it was a mistake. I'm not obligated to hate Andy because of the choices the writers made, and I can say 'this felt out of character and it was a bad choice that I think shouldn't have happened,' and other people getting mad at me for not seeing Andy exclusively through the lens of who he was in season nine would be ridiculous. If I made some kind of statement like 'Andy was a pretty good boss at the start of season eight' and someone was like "yeah well he was horrible in the ninth season so he was clearly just pretending to be a good boss" it'd be ridiculous. And if I said 'I just skip over a lot of season nine Andy so I can enjoy his character more,' and someone responded with 'I can't believe you like a character who did such bad things, clearly you're an idiot,' it'd be ridiculous.

Why do people have this idea that if the writers decide something for a character (no matter how late in the game) you have to base whether you like or dislike a character on that alone? If you think something is badly written, if you think that something is a bad choice, if you like a character that's a villain and want to write them as a hero instead, you should be freaking allowed to just clip clip cut out the things you don't like.

I like the character of James Ironwood prior to shooting Oscar, I don't have to say 'well the writers decided he was a completely evil irredeemable villain and therefore it wouldn't be moral of me to like him and now when I watch the Fall of Beacon in volume three I'm morally obligated to seethe about what a bad person he is, better never write fanfics where he's a good guy ever again!' ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I've written fanfictions where I have certain characters just be better than they were in the universe because that makes me enjoy the universe more. I've written fics where characters who do bad things that the writers treat as acceptable apologize for their actions. I've looked at characters who have never been anything but villains and then written fics where they're just flawed good guys because I wanted to explore that universe and loved the character concepts. I've disliked whole movies in a series and decided 'in my mind the franchise cuts off here.' There's some pieces of media where I have to adjust everyone in order to enjoy writing for them, but I still enjoy the characters. I've loved badly written characters since I was a kid despite thinking the writer choices were off, and put Pixie Hollow Disney fairy books on my Christmas wish-lists even though my dad reminded me Tinkerbell tried to murder somebody because I could just ignore that. The very first thing I ever wrote was a Star Wars fanfiction when I was six and I didn't like that George Lucas made C-3PO a scaredy cat so I made him into a brave hero instead. I'm not going to just base what I like or don't like on whatever thing the writers wanted or intended. Why would I have to do that?

And honestly, I'm not posting this because I have a real problem with people who do throw out characters when the writers want them to, or only portray or see characters how the writers want them to, or anything like that. But for the love of God I would like them to stop getting angry or judgey when other people are just like 'huh, I don't like this change. I reject it for my own headcanons. This isn't how I see the character.' Like... Why the hell does it matter so much to other people that we must only see fictional characters the exact way the writers intended and therefore must hate the characters who the writers make do bad things. Also this always comes with hypocrisy, because the people that try to police who other people are allowed to like always like other flawed characters or even villains lol, and always adjust their favorites to be better or ignore the mistakes of their favorites.

[kitkatt0430]

So I've decided to go ahead with watching the latest episode of the Flash. Spoilers below.

Blaine is such a fucking idiot. Wow. Like, that's how he's gonna break Caitlin's dead to the team? And has he considered, even once, that the version of Frost he brings back might not be the one he knew? Frost didn't meet him until after she split from Caitlin. The remnants of Frost in Caitlin - if there are any - may not have the first damn idea who Mark is. But what she will know? Is he killed her sister, that she sacrificed her life to save, in order to bring Frost back.

Oh wow, what a complete and utter moron, I hate Blaine so damn much.

Where's Hartley, I'm tired of the Snow plotline already.

Oh, there he is. Flirting with his boyfriend and they're adorable. Oooh, do Hartley and Roderick own this club? The flirting made it sound like they do. Or at least Hartley does. He and Roderick being adorable together is so great. This is everything I've wanted for those two since Roderick stopped being Sleeping Beauty in S6. (Gosh has it been that long?)

Pied Piper vs. the Fiddler - I do like the way their sound tech interacts and the fight, though short, is fun.

(No seriously can someone just stab Mark Blaine a few times. Whoops, he's dead, how terrible, let's forget about him immediately? Like, is he just being particularly awful in this episode or has what little tolerance I have for him eroded entirely after skipping most of S8?)

Anyway, Snow does not seem thrilled about Mark's plan. She's probably afraid to die and is too 'new' to life to be able to admit it. And I have to wonder if really she's just Caitlin with amnesia and Frost's powers?

Anyway, seriously, just fuck Blaine.

Thank goodness Hartley still knows where all the stuff in Caitlin's lab is. Or at least has a general idea, anyway. Though I'd like to think sometimes he just hung out with Caitlin for old times sake.

Oh no. Barry please do not make excuses for Blaine. I'm so tired of this guy. Though Barry being all cryptic on 'we have to go' is hilarious.

Chester - TECHNOBABLE

Iris follows that so much better than I did. She's so smart and awesome and let me just fangirl over her a bit.

Hartley muttering at, and cussing out, his gloves as he tries to repair them. Most relatable moment on this episode so far.

Snow certainly has Caitlin's desire to help people, worrying about Hartley clearly being hurt. And she realizes how worried about Roderick Hartley is. Listening to him worry about Roderick. Awww

But Snow makes a good point. Change is something you have to choose for yourself. Trying to force a change for someone else isn't going to work. *staring right at Blaine* But Hartley has already changed - while having Roderick back in his life may have made choosing to change easier, Hartley made that choice before Roderick was saved and thought there was no way to save Roderick. He made that choice when he went to save Barry from Godspeed. Everything after was just follow through.

Everyone fighting over who Snow should die to resurrect. Do any of them even hear themselves? How awful and, quite frankly, like bad guys they sound? She's her own person now and she deserves to live, even if the way she came into the world was awful.

>_<

Okay, so Iris' reasons for choosing Frost are kinda dumb. *sigh*

Snow loves nature. (Sky High anyone???) Snow is very sweet, but I do think they're spending too much time drawing out this plot line. That said I'm so glad that Cecile at least actually takes the time to ask Snow what she wants.

All this retconning with Thomas Snow. Seriously, none of that fits in the established Caitlin&Frost timeline. How much did the multiverse reboot change Caitlin and Frost's origins? But whatever, at least they finally decided it should be Snow's choice.

(No, really, what would make more sense is if Thomas had considered using a CRC type machine to get rid of Icicle but ultimately was too afraid Icicle would use it to kill him instead. Then that could have been a development that happened later when he locked himself away to try and find a 'cure' to Icicle. And a brain scan from Caitlin's childhood? What did they want to do, restore Caitlin to a twelve year old's mentality? Brains change over time. Oh wow, so much was not thought through in this retconning.)

Oh no! Roderick! Hartley, seriously, learn to ask for help when you need it? Lucky him, Barry came anyway and showed him what he needed to do to save Roderick.

Hartley - You figure it out, I'm busy. *grinning at Roderick because awwwwwww look he's so in love*

Snow picking the name Khione - I'm so glad she got to pick her own name.

That said, seriously. Who is gonna tell Cisco about all this? He's gonna be so pissed off.

Hartley destroying the CRC. Yes, finally, someone with some sense around here. Well, if we can't have Cisco and Caitlin friendship this season, I'm liking the Hartley and Khione friendship. Blaine threatening Hartley... is it bad I'm hoping something comes of that so Hartley can kick Mark Blaine's butt? Since clearly Hartley's the only one with any sense whatsoever.

Let's hope Hartley sticks around for more episodes. *finger crossed*

Iris, yes, make fun of Barry's dancing more please. Someone stop him. And Chester. Please. This is the kind of dancing Angel was terrified of dancing like on AtS.

Oooh, looks like Hartley will be in the next episode too. (checked out the trailer for ep 3) Guess I'll be checking in for that one too.

So it does seem like no one is properly upset or grieving over Caitlin or really mourning her which... is disappointing. Barry at least feels guilty over their last interaction but Blaine's just like 'let's kill her extra dead for Frost's sake'. Ah yes, what a wonderful person he was for Frost to date.

All the 'this is what Caitlin would want' going on just sounds like them handwaving over the fact that Caitlin was grieving and depressed, never got the help she needed for the multiple traumas and deaths of loved ones she endured, and she was not in any way, shape, or form thinking clearly when she tried to resurrect Frost. Her death was a terrible and preventable tragedy and it's like no one wants to look too hard or else they'll have to accept their culpability in failing one of their friends. But sacrificing Khione to resurrect Caitlin or Frost would have just been repeating Caitlin's mistakes so... it took them way too long to come to an answer that should have been obvious as the only ethical choice from the start.

Anyway, I want more Hartley and Roderick being cute together because they're now the cutest couple on the show. Sorry Barry and Iris, but you've been usurped by the cute and flirty duo. But then Barry and Iris were only the cutest couple on the show 'cause Cisco and Kamilla left, so... *shrug* (Grant and Candice do what they can with the show's writing, but 'babymoon'? They're not spinning that as romantic, there's just no way. But at least they're acknowledging that Iris should be pregnant sometime relatively soonish.)

(I did actually go back and watch Ep1 before this. And, um... it had some good parts. But I also skipped around a lot 'cause I got bored. It was not the best time loop episode i've ever seen. It was middling of the road as far as episodes went and reminded me more of the reasons why it took me so long to start shipping Barry/Iris on the show in the first place. Namely, did Iris ever actually choose Barry? Or did she, after Eddie died, let herself get pushed into a relationship that she didn't necessarily want because everyone was pushing Barry as her destiny? Not that she didn't clearly find happiness with Barry, but... well, this is one of the reasons why i say canon does them dirty. Barry/Iris has been hit and miss as a result and it's not a good sign that the final season started off with something that felt more like a miss than a hit.)