#and i want hartley to kick his butt | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

love-fireflysong · 3 years ago

Note

I Would Love to read a 3 and a 5 from the List, with Chris And Ashley... :)

3. Drunk/sloppy kiss

5. Angry kiss

AO3 link

PRE-GAME

“You think we got everything we need?”

Ashley thoughtfully considered the sight of the coffee table in front of her. Taking in the xxxl Hawaiian pizza (with extra cheese of course) that Chris had somehow been able to track down and order, the (already half-eaten) large bag of pretzels, the extremely large bowl of popcorn (covered in a frankly terrifying amount of butter and salt), and, most importantly, the dozen or so cans of beer that sat chilling in a bowl of ice. She grinned. “Oh yeah, I think we’re set.”

Chris mirrored her grin exactly. “Usual rules?”

“Obviously. Unless you can think of something better of course.”

Chris scoffed with a roll of his eyes, but never let the grin leave his face. “And have you then claiming that my new rules are the only reason I even won when I inevitably kick your scrawny bookworm ass? Please, you wish.”

Ashley raised her eyebrows. “Oh so you think that you’re gonna win this round then Hartley?”

“Oh, I don’t think; I know.”

“Big words coming from the guy who’s almost never managed to win a game of this in his life.” Ashley grabbed at a slice of pizza, and a long trail of cheese stretched from the slice all the way back into the box. She broke the string of cheese at its base and piled it back onto the slice itself for an extra cheesy first bite.

Chris just shrugged as he reached to flick the switch on the 64 to bring the game to life, and then returned to his spot on the couch. “That’s just cause I’m always unlucky enough to get Josh on my team for every team battle. And, need I remind you, he’s not exactly here to play this time.”

“Nope, instead you’re gonna have to deal with the computer as your partner, same as me, so you’ll have no excuse when I still kick your butt to kingdom come.” Even as she said the words though, Ashley let herself curl up into Chris’s side and smiled around the pizza when she felt him drop a kiss onto the top of her head.

Oh, this was going to be the best date night ever.

CHARACTER SELECT

“Oh my god Chris! Get your stupid cursor off my character!” At some point during their argument over which board to play only a few seconds earlier, Ashley had pushed herself off of Chris so she was now at the far end of the couch, and was using this new position as leverage to kick him in the side of his thigh. Kicks that only got firmer and more instant when he still refused to relinquish Luigi to her.

“Your character? I don’t remember seeing your name on him.”

“I always play as Luigi you butt! You know that! So. Give. Him. Up.” Each word was punctuated with a flat-footed shove and Chris seemed to ignore her as he (pretended) to hum and haw over which character he wanted to play as.

“I don’t know Ash, maybe I wanted to play as a different character this time, you ever think of that?”

“I don’t care if you want to play as a different character! Just give me Luigi!”

Chris still continued to ignore her, though he was definitely starting to have problems keeping a straight face the longer Ashley continued to kick at him. “Well, maybe we wouldn’t be having this problem if you weren't first player. Your cursor would have landed straight smack dab onto Luigi’s square and we wouldn’t be having this argument.”

Ashley paused in her kicking to give him an incredulous look. “Wait, are you trying to tell me that this is my fault? It’s not my fault that you were unlucky enough to lose the stupid rock-paper-scissors game and player one privileges!”

“If you think the game was stupid, then why don’t you let me be player one then? It would certainly solve all our problems…”

“Oh no, I won fair and square. So you can just sit over there as the sad player two self that you are and let me pick Luigi!” Finishing off her sentence, Ashley reaches into the popcorn bowl to grab a handful of the overly buttered snack and flings it at Chris’s face as hard as she can.

She feels a little bad when one of the kernels manages to stick right onto the lens of his glasses, covering the lens in a film of thick, sticky butter, but immediately disregards it when he drops his controller to try and clean them off. Ashley takes advantage of this moment to dive across the couch and try to grab at his abandoned controller to move the cursor into an empty square, but fails almost instantly when abandons trying to clean his glasses to wrap his arms around her and pull her the rest of the way into his lap.

“No!” she squeals as she fights ineffectively against him and her own giggles. “Let me go Chris!”

“Nope, gotta clean off my glasses first.” He leaves one arm wrapped around her waist to hold her in place against him, and maneuvers himself so he can wipe off the buttery film left on the lens of his glasses on her sweater. So intent on trying to keep her still while he does this, he completely ignores the fact that she’s able to now successfully move the joystick so Luigi is left free for her to play as while she selects his usual character of choice.

Unsurprisingly, Ashley finishes her goal far before he does, but lets him finish cleaning off his glasses. She’s more than okay with where she is right now honestly, Chris’s arm solid around her waist while she sits in his lap and his head hooked over her shoulder so he can see what he’s doing. She even decides to take advantage of the position by leaning over just a bit to give him a quick peck just at the corner of his eye. His arm tightens around her waist for just a second in a one-armed hug to show his appreciation, and with one final quick glance at his now cleaner glasses, he pretty much shoves her off of him and back to her side of the couch.

She laughs as he does it though, and even harder at his mock gasp of horror once he realizes just what she had done. “Ashley Brown! Did you take advantage of me just so you could have Luigi all to yourself? The betrayal!”

Ashley’s quick to scramble for her controller and grab Luigi before Chris has the time to unselect Princess Peach and start the fight all over again. “All’s fair in love and Mario Party, you know that!”

Chris shakes his head as though still trying to come to terms with her actions, but never actually bothers to change his character. Not that she would have expected it of course. Just as Ashley always played as Luigi, Chris always took Princess Peach. Other games with their larger character selections would have changed their choices of course, but this is how it always was when it came to this particular version. So without fanfare, Ashley moved right on to choosing the computer characters to play against: picking Mario (as always), and almost picking Wario before hesitating a moment and selecting Donkey Kong instead at the last minute.

It admittedly felt weird a couple of seconds later though. Watching the four characters running across the screen and not seeing Wario’s squat yellow and purple color scheme joining Luigi’s green, Peach’s pink, and Mario’s red. But just as Luigi was Ashley’s and Peach Chris’s, Wario was one hundred percent Josh’s.

But Josh wasn’t here right now, and playing against his character when he wasn’t even here for it just felt wrong. Though considering he wasn’t here to stop them or bitch and moan about how the computers were cheating assholes, she decided to go the extra mile and pick the normal difficulty instead of the easy he always managed to talk them into. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught Chris raising his eyebrows in intrigue, but the maniacal and excited grin as he buckled down was more than worth it.

TURN-ORDER

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?!”

Though the open air question of disbelief hadn’t been aimed toward Ashley in particular, there was no way she would have ever been able to hold back the delighted, albeit surprised, bark of laughter that she answered with. Laughter that only got more victorious once she caught sight of the dumbfounded outrage on Chris’s face as he stared at the number one that hovered judgmentally over Peach’s head. And would continue to hover until Ashley broke out of her laughing fit long enough to jump and hit the die that still continued to spin over character.

As it was, when her giggling started to slow down enough that she was able to move again, it wasn’t to continue on with the game. It was instead to make the first move of the more important game that was now about to start, reaching down to grab one of the cans from the bowl filled with ice that rested between their feet and handing the beer to him. Chris didn’t take it right away, watching as a drop of water slowly rolled down the side of the can.

“This is complete bullshit and you know it.”

Ashley ignored the pathetic pout he gave her, and only waved the can more insistently in front of his face when he tried to deepen the pout in question. “You know the rules—” she mocked in a singsong voice “—you rolled a one so drink up.”

With a pained sigh, Chris took the can from her hand and pulled the beer-tab with a sharp, metallic crack and took the promised swig. Making the first official move of the much-beloved and well-played drinking game of theirs.

The outraged cry that came when he was forced to take yet another swig, made the ten she managed to hit only seconds later all the sweeter.

TURN SEVEN

“You are a horrible person, I hope you know this. You are the worst boyfriend in the whole entire world and I will never hate anyone as much as I hate you right now.”

From the other end of the couch, Chris danced in his seat and pretended not to notice Ashley sulking right next to him. He gleefully paid the Boo another five coins and even more gleefully sent them over to steal the majority of the remaining thirty-one coins that she still had left to Luigi’s name. “Oh I’m sorry, can you repeat that? I can’t hear you over the sound of me rolling in all your money right now.”

“I hate you,” she repeated, even as she frantically tapped at the button to try and minimize the damage from the ghost robbery. “I regret ever falling in love with you in the first place and—Oh come on!” Chris laughed triumphantly as she placed her head into her hands with a groan when her coin count reduced from thirty-one all the way down to a measly seven. Her place never dropped of course, the two stars she had been able to collect so far had prevented that, but Chris jumped all the way from dead last to a very strong second place. “Boo Alley is the worst and the only thing worse than that is you.”

“What ever happened to ‘all fair in love and Mario Party’ Ash?”

“There is no love. It died the moment you stole forty-five of my hard-earned coins.”

Chris snickered as the two of them watched the game split themselves into a 2v2 battle—he and Mario on one side with Ashley and Donkey Kong on the other—taking the time while a mini-game was chosen to grab another slice of pizza. Ashley wasn’t surprised. There was no need for him to worry after all, it didn’t matter if she managed to win the minigame, she was still gonna be three coins short to buy the star that she had been unlucky enough to stop one square before on her earlier turn. And yet, she watched him drop the slice quickly when the game chosen was Magnet Carta and Ashley let out a relieved sigh. Of all the games to be chosen, this was absolutely not the one he needed right now, but the one she clearly did.

The two of them were going to have to bring their A-game to this one. Her to try and gather as many of the coins and bags as possible, and him to prevent that from ever happening. She knew that both of them were hoping that each would get lucky and that most of the coin bags would land on their side of the game space, and, more importantly, that they would be able to beat the other to the treasure chest once it made its anticipated appearance.

TURN TWELVE

Ashley shoved another handful of popcorn into her mouth as she glowered angrily at the tv screen. This had not been her round at all. A mispress of the button had her declining to pay the Boo the five coins needed for her to take her monetary revenge against Chris, and while she had thankfully missed the happening space that would change the board back to day (giving her one more chance to try next turn unless someone else managed to change it) she did land on the Bowser space just after it. Meaning that she had to take a swig out of her second can while Bowser ran through the roulette of terrible options. And of course landing on the ‘Coins for Bowser’ and thus nearly emptying her entire coin purse in the process.

Honestly, him taking the entire amount probably would have been better. The single, solitary coin that he had left her with had just been rude.

The rest of the round hadn’t gone any better. Donkey Kong had pulled out his golden mushroom and had rolled an almost unbelievable twenty-eight, easily overtaking her and grabbing the star that she had only been a mere six spaces away from. Moving the star to the entire other side of the board closer to where Chris was, but still thankfully out of his reach. Leaving, of course, Baby Bowser to chill right in front of her with no way to avoid him or the swig and five coin loss she was likely gonna be taking next round. And then, just because he wanted to rub it in some more Ashley had to assume, the stupid ape then went and landed on a chance time square just for good measure. Forcing her to give one of her precious, precious stars to himself, and ripping her out of first place and planting himself and his stupid, ugly tie there instead.

Mario’s turn had been uneventful for the most part, except for when he went and landed on one of the squares to change night back into day, and thus refusing Ashley her chance to get back at Chris with the Boo next round and take some of her money back.

And Chris? Oh, he finally managed to roll a ten on his dice block. And while it wasn’t nearly enough to get him to the star, the roll itself meant that she had to take yet another swig out of her can of beer. His turn ended blissfully non-eventful at least, just landing on a blue square and collecting three coins after paying the bank its five.

She had to assume it was pure maliciousness on the games end, because Mario and Donkey Kong’s green changed to red, and throwing them all into a 1v3 battle and then out of all the games it could have chosen, landed on Crane Game. Ashley didn’t even hesitate, taking her third swig and then just deciding to down the rest of the can before the game even started. She just let Chris do his thing and didn’t even bother to try and fight as she sullenly ate a couple of slices of pizza to try and fight off the effects of the half a can of beer she’d had to down in a single round.

TURN TWENTY-THREE

Ashley used every trick she had up her sleeves to keep Chris exactly where he was as she continued to kiss him. Her thighs straddled him so he couldn’t move out from underneath her. Hands holding the sides of his face and fingers knotting into his hair. Barely letting him pull away for air before she was tugging him back and trying to kiss him even deeper than before. It seemed to be working too, if the way his arms had wrapped tightly around her waist to hold her closer was any indication.

And that was perfect, it was all according to plan after all.

The moment that Mario had chosen Peach to use the dueling glove on, she had acted. Pretending that the beer had started affecting her more than it actually had (which probably wasn’t too far off if she was being honest with herself), she had put her controller off to the side on the armrest and moved closer to Chris so she could start layering kiss after kiss up his neck and across his jaw in an effort to distract him. And distract him it had, he had only just barely been able to choose the coin amount before just abandoning the game entirely to properly return her affections. He had even taken her slightly parted lips as an invitation to fully deepen the kiss instead of the victorious smile it had actually been.

Not wanting to arouse his suspicions to what she was really planning, Ashley continued to let Chris take the lead, letting him control the speed of how quickly or slowly he wanted to take things. She could be patient, it wasn’t like she was forcing herself to do this after all. Kissing Chris would always be the highlight of just about everything, especially with how much alcohol was currently clouding her brain with a drunken haze of pleasure right now. Thankfully though, she didn’t have to wait long before he had started trying to pull her up closer to him and she followed eagerly. Not letting him separate from her for even a second lest he discover exactly what it was she had planned, Ashley blindly fumbled around until she found the controller that was still in Chris’s lap and tossed it off to the side.

But not before she pressed the button to start the duel.

Barely a moment later, in an effort to try and distract him from the sound of the announcer quite literally yelling “START!”, she had taken the lead entirely. Fully pulling herself onto his lap so he wouldn’t be able to see the screen and game playing on behind her. Her hands tightly grasping the sides of his face, while really she was just covering his ears so he couldn’t hear the sound effects of Mario tossing the mushrooms into the cauldron. And every second spent apart meant a chance of Chris catching a glimpse of the Goomba announcing a new colour so she kept pulling him back in before he could open his eyes.

Not that any of this was a chore or bad thing of course, Ashley was pretty sure that she could have gladly spent hours making out with Chris on the couch like this. To the point that when she vaguely heard Mario’s victory shout and Peach's upset cry, she was almost disappointed that she was going to have to stop kissing him now. Almost disappointed mind you, she was feeling way too smug and proud of herself for any real feelings of disappointment to solidify.

Loosening her grip, Ashley pulled back and Chris followed to try and close the distance between them yet again. It was nearly enough that she was tempted just to forget about the game entirely and continue this instead. She managed to hold back though, and oh was it worth it.

Normally she would have taken the time to straighten his glasses, but due to the fact that she’d had the palms of her hand firmly in place over his ears they had miraculously managed to stay entirely in place this time. So she got to witness the absolutely dazed look in his eyes when he opened them to gaze at her, and fully appreciate both the completely besotted smile on his face and the way his thumbs had started rubbing attractive little circles into the sides of her hips. But all of that paled in comparison to when the dazed but content look in his eyes changed to confusion at the self-satisfied smirk that Ashley hadn’t even bothered to try and disguise, before finally shifting entirely to dawning horror.

Ashley wasn’t sure which was louder, her cackle as she laughed victoriously when he unceremoniously shoved her off of him, or Chris’s cry of distress once he fully took in the ‘MARIO WON’ on the bottom half of the tv screen.

TURN TWENTY-FIVE

It had taken the two of them nearly two and a half hours, but they were finally half way done. Chris was now deep into his fifth can of beer, and Ashley wasn't far behind at all, having just cracked open her fifth as well when she had managed to get last place in the last minigame. The coffee table in front of them was scattered with the half eaten remains of now very cold pizza, and all that filled the pretzel bag was salty crumbs. The bowl that had once been nothing but ice was now filled with water as the couple remaining cans of beer bobbed along the surface. Empty beer cans littered the carpet of the floor and, worst of all, they had run out of popcorn.

One of them was going to have to go and dump the bowl of water to refill it with ice and fresh cans soon, but neither trusted each other enough to leave their controllers unattended for even a second. The two of them had always played dirty after all, and not having Josh here with them only made their tactics more underhanded.

And, well, Ashley could tell that Chris was just itching to get her back for her actions during his duel a couple turns ago, and there was no way she was going to give him that chance at payback if she could help it.

But, she also really, really needed to go pee right now.

"I'm hereby invoking article one-dash-two of the Mario Party Accord of '09," she announced to the room, steadfastly ignoring the sulking glare that Chris was still sending her way even now from his side of the couch. "No cheating, lying, or otherwise deceitful and underhanded tactics are allowed while bathroom breaks are in effect."

Like a switch had been flipped, any anger that had been in Chris was gone. Vanished the second he had slumped his shoulders in nothing but complete relief. "Oh thank fuck." The next second, the two of them had all but tossed their controllers onto the coffee table, all so they could try and beat each other to the lone bathroom first.

It wasn't a close race. Even though Ashley had been closest to the bathroom door and the first to flee from the couch, Chris had been able to catch up almost immediately. And then, just to add insult to injury, he had reached out and grabbed the back of her sweater, roughly tugging her backwards so he could pull ahead and rushed into the bathroom first, slamming the door behind him.

"No fair!" Ashley says as she rattles the doorknob, which unsurprisingly he had locked behind him. "You cheated, you... you butt! And you can't cheat while bathroom breaks are in effect!"

"That only applies to the game Ash, you know that!" Chris cheekily responds back, the door barely muffling his glee. "Any measures that are taken during the race to the toilet is free game."

She does know that, obviously. She had tripped Josh last time and had laughed when he had all but taken Chris out with him, but she still pouts angrily as she makes her way to the kitchen to make some more popcorn and refill their beer supply. Thankfully, she doesn't have to wait long until Chris is done and he takes over, grabbing the bag of ice from the freezer while she's in the middle of dumping the bowl water down the drain.

By the time she's finished in the bathroom, Chris is dumping the last bag of popcorn into the bowl and there's a full glass of water waiting for her nearby. She chugs it without a word, more grateful than she can say for the cold liquid on her throat. In thanks, she stands maybe a little too close to him when she reaches around to grab the now full bowl of popcorn, brushing her arm against his as she does so. She also may have let her fingers linger on his before taking the bowl away, but that doesn't really matter in the end.

Not when the moment the two of them had sat back down on opposite ends of the couch with their controllers once again in hand, Chris was immediately back to sulking and likely plotting his revenge.

TURN THIRTY-SIX

She had known the second Donkey Kong had picked her for the duel, that retribution was at hand. She knew it almost as well as she had known that Chris had been biding his time for over an hour now, just waiting to strike and get her back. So Ashley had acted, tightening her grip on her controller and kicking her legs out towards him in an effort to create some kind of defense as she tried to get through the coin betting and to the duel itself as quickly as possible.

"No, no, no. Don't you dare Chris, don't you—" she interrupts herself with a squeal when he breaks past her (admittedly meager) defenses easily, ignoring her legs entirely as he tries to pin her down. Not wanting to go down without a fight, Ashley clutches the controller to her chest and tries to turn her body away from him as she frantically taps the buttons that appear on screen.

The fact that she misses about a third of the buttons anyways—seeing as her now extremely intoxicated brain is too slow to keep up with the prompts—isn't important. What is important is that unlike when she had successfully managed to distract Chris from his duel earlier in the evening, she's actually fighting back. She's certainly losing the fight, but at least she's trying, so that's something in her books.

It takes very little time for Chris to be able to successfully roll her back around, and then he's kissing her harshly while he works on wrestling the 64-controller out of her hands. But still she tries, tugging herself out of his grasp so she can try and keep an eye on the game playing out. Until she finds him angrily kissing her once again, this time with more teeth and tongue than anything else. Eventually, he does manage to wrest the controller from her, and haphazardly tosses it to the floor below so he can continue kissing her.

Ashley felt like she should be disappointed in herself for how quickly she caved once her hands were free, almost immediately throwing her arms around his neck to hold him closer. Curving her body into his as she kissed him back just as desperately.

Neither of them would realize that the duel had long ended until the sound of Chris's controller interrupted them when Ashley accidentally kicked it off the couch and onto the floor with a loud clatter a few minutes later.

TURN FORTY-FIVE

"I hate him, Chris. Do you hear me? I hate him." Ashley glared hatefully and sullenly at the television screen. Or more specifically, at the leaderboard that displayed Donkey Kong very firmly and comfortably in first place. He was a full five stars ahead of where Ashley held her extremely precarious second place (Chris only a few measly coins short of overtaking her), and had nearly twice the coins of Mario where he trailed the pack. She should have been relieved that the two of them had at least managed to keep with their usual secondary goal of keeping Mario out of the winner's circle, but she wasn't.

"I hate his stupid face, and his stupid looking red tie, and his stupid sounding...sounds. Donkey Kong is stupid and I'm officially banning him from ever being played again."

Next to her one the couch, Chris drunkeningly giggled and she couldn't deny how nice his laugh was. Especially when she was tucked up securely against his side and the sound of it rumbled through her. After that disastrous round where Ashley had unsurprisingly lost the duel despite her best efforts, the two of them had been nearly inseparable on the couch. But only because it made trying to distract the other from the game at hand so much easier of course. And if the distractions just so happened to last longer than the minigames themselves, it certainly wasn't their fault that the former was far more entertaining than the latter.

Even if it meant that it had taken them nearly an hour to play through the last ten rounds.

Chris's arm was wrapped around Ashley's shoulders, and his thumb rubbing pleasantly back and forth against her now bare arm. The two of them had ditched their sweaters a couple of rounds back (another one of their giggly attempts at distraction, you can't play if you can't see after all) and she snuggled up closer to his side as she took her turn. Watching Luigi circle the board with the half-decent six she had managed to roll (thankfully avoiding yet another drink she couldn't afford to take), she stopped in front of the Boo and debated her choices. She could spend the fifty coins she barely had and steal a star from that no-good stupid gorilla—shortening the lead Donkey had by a full two stars—or... she could go the extremely petty route and take it from Chris instead.

She gave a couple of long, slow blinks as she thought about it. Too long in fact, if the way that even Chris (who was just as drunk as she was, if not moreso) caught on. Moving his arm from around her shoulders to place it on her waist and dig that same thumb into her side. Not painfully though—never painfully—but it did bring a shocked yelp out of her as Chris did his best to tickle her with only one hand.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on who you would ask) for her, Ashley's efforts to try and get away from his thumb only brought her further into his lap, and thus closer and in easier reach for his other hand to join into the fray. She decided in the end that she only needed one hand to choose her fate and used the other to try and bat Chris's arm away from her side.

But it appeared to be just the opening he had been looking for. The next second he had stopped trying to tickle her and pulled her further into his lap so he could wrap his arm around her and flick the left joystick up just before she was able to select Peach as her victim of choice. She tried to scream out a little 'No!' but all that came out were frantic giggles as Chris only doubled down on tickling her sides.

It was all she could do to watch Boo steal Mario's star through her tears of red-faced laughter, abandoning her controller to fruitlessly try and get out of Chris's lap and away from his fingers.

BONUS STARS

It was three in the morning and Josh was so fucking done with this entire day. Spending most of the day with the most annoying person in his class so they could work on their stupid psychology project together was not how he wanted to spend five minutes of any day, muchless nearly twelve straight hours of it. Honestly—even though he knew that Ash would have glared at him for days afterwards when she found out—he probably would have skipped the stupid thing entirely if it hadn't been worth nearly twenty-five percent of his grade. The pounding headache he had gotten from dealing with his partner was almost not worth it.

But it was done. After hours and hours spending time with his (now) least favourite person in the whole entire world, the stupid project was done. So he shoved his key into the front door of the apartment, already dreaming of his bed with all its high thread-count sheets and plush blankets.

The tired groan he had opened the door with had very quickly transformed into a horrified yelp and a frantic slam of the door behind him.

"Jesus fucking Christ! My eyes!" Josh had immediately slapped his free hand over his eyes, but it did very little to erase the image that was already burned into them. The sight of Chris's hands around Ashley's extremely bare waist and her own digging possessively into his hair as the two of them eagerly made out would likely give him nightmares for the next few weeks. At least. "Really? Do you guys really need to do this now?" He waited to hear the embarrassed squeaks and frantic movements of the two of them trying to get as much distance from each other as possible, but it was silent. The only sound he could make out was the music of whatever game the two of them had been playing coming from the tv.

Hesitatingly, Josh opened his fingers just enough so he could peek through and yup, found his two best friends had not moved an inch from where they sat on the couch, their faces red and staring at him in confusion. They had at least stopped kissing though, and he was exceedingly thankful to realize that Ashley wasn't actually naked from the waist up like he had originally thought. It was true that her shirt had been pushed up far higher than she had probably ever wanted Josh to see on her, but she was at least still wearing it. Though, judging from the way that Chris had one of his hands on the bottom of the shirt in question, he had a sneaking suspicion that it wouldn't have stayed that way for much longer.

Josh did not want to imagine exactly what kind of scene he would have walked into if he had arrived back home even five minutes later.

"Like really? Really you two?" Josh groaned, his headache only getting worse and worse by the second. "I just texted you that I was on my way back like fifteen minutes ago. You couldn't have done this in—oh, I don't know?—your own fucking room? But noooo, you decided to do this on the couch. The couch that I also sit on by the way. Not that I'm likely ever gonna be able to sit on it now knowing that this is the type of shit that you two apparently get up to when I'm gone. Normally I would probably be congratulating you two right now for actually having a functioning libido apparently, but shockingly enough that's the last thing in my mind right now. Cause really, the couch? Seriously?"

It was when there was still no response from either of them, just the same confused stares, that Josh finally fully removed the hand from his face. "Okay seriously, are you two okay? Pretty sure that no make out, no matter how good, is enough to break both of your brains this... badly..."

Without his hand in the way, Josh was finally able to get a good view of the living room. Especially the cans upon cans of empty beer that absolutely littered the floor and coffee table. Suddenly, Chris and Ashley's red faces and the glazed-over look of their eyes made a whole lot more sense now. "Wait, are the two of you fucking drunk?"

They didn’t respond, only continuing to stare at him in that same confusion before Ashley managed to slur out, "Josh? Tha… that you?"

He couldn't help it, Josh started laughing. Absolutely heaving out great guffs of air as he struggled to keep both his breath and his balance, before finally electing to lean against the door, tears streaming from his eyes. Whatever headache he had going on right now was going to be absolutely nothing compared to the hangovers that Chris and Ashley were going to have come morning. "Oh my fucking god. You two are so fucking hammered right now, holy shit. What the hell did you two do while I was gone to get you this smashed?"

Neither of them answered him, but he didn't expect one in the first place. The two of them were so far gone that he was pretty sure that they wouldn't have been able to separate without one, or both of them, just toppling from the couch entirely at this point. Once he had been able to catch his breath at least to the point where he was able to stand up unaided again, Josh let his bag fall from his shoulder to the floor as he walked over to them, still struggling to hold back some of the incredulous laughter that remained. He wasn't too sure how exactly he was going to maneuver them to their own room in the apartment, but he liked to think that he was at least enough of a decent friend to try and get them somewhere comfier to sleep once they both inevitably passed out.

That, and if the two of them decided to pick up from where they left off once he leaves the room, he really didn't want them to continue this on the couch.

Once he gets closer to them though, he manages to catch exactly what is on the screen of the television out of the corner of his eye. Luigi, Peach, Mario, and (weirdly enough) Donkey Kong standing in the center of the screen while Toad announces Peach the winner of the 'Happening Star' apparently.

Horrified, Josh turns back to look at Chris and Ashley with nothing but pure betrayal on his face, hurt beyond words. "The two of you were playing Drinking Party 2? Without me?"

The worst part was that Chris and Ashley were too drunk to even realize that they should be ashamed of themselves.

#my writing #until dawn #chrashley #chris hartley #ashley brown #josh washington #god if you're still around anon i am so sorry that this took so long holy shit #for those that remember me saying i was done like 95% of this?#yeah that bonus stars bit was literally all i had left to write #ive had the rest done for months #i just bounced back and forth over whether i wanted to continue with ash's pov or switch to josh #decided quite literally yesterday that 'fuck it im doing josh' and finished it in a couple of hours #only a couple of kiss prompts left though!#here's hoping it won't take me another year to fill them lol

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hoodiesandcomputers · 8 years ago

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Shared My Body and My Mind With You (That’s All Over Now): Chapter 8/8

Six months ago Felicity did the unthinkable and paid to have sex with the one and only Oliver. Despite being worlds apart they’ve become close friends, but what happens as feelings change, a rival comes into the picture, and a friendship suddenly starts to break? A continuation of a prostitute/client AU, which comes from my one-shot “Taste of Your Poison Paradise.”

Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay -- this chapter ended up being a monster. So if you’re on mobile and don’t want to read this, I would absolutely recommend coming back to your dash or tag in an hour or so. You’ll be scrolling a lot, lol.

Many thanks to @curvy-tam and @the-mimi-hiddleston for supporting me when I needed it the most. They were so understanding and gave me all the time I needed to get back on track. And of course, I have to thank @awriterincowboyboots for making this chapter a thousand times better. <3

Ch 1 // Ch 2 // Ch 3 // Ch 4 // Ch 5 // Ch 6 // Ch 7 // FF // Ao3

Nine months later

Despite moving her desk away from the windows, Felicity finds herself suspiciously staring at the windows and wondering when they’ll break off. Back at Kord her office was on the 51st floor, but now she’s all the way at the 60th and no amount of anxiety pills can make her overcome her fear of heights. She doesn’t doubt she could switch offices with someone else, but all the offices have windows on this floor, so it wouldn’t really make a difference.

Sighing, Felicity decides the best way to stop looking over to the side is to put a large plant that’ll obstruct her view of the ground below. Still, she shouldn’t complain too much when she’s got a nice view of Star City and the plaque outside her door which reads “Felicity Smoak, CTO.”

Now that is what success looks like.

It’s been nine months since Felicity left Chicago, and she’s starting to become accustomed to her new home. Star City is different from Chicago – it’s smaller and cleaner, and it feels more relaxed.

And not just the city. She was always stressed at Kord, wondering if she had done the wrong thing or overstepped her boundaries and she’d never had any time to breathe. Even though she’s CTO, Felicity actually has two full days off for the weekend instead of spending her Saturdays in the office. The workload is different and she oversees everything technology related in Palmer Tech, but it’s good. She’s busy and happy – her bank account is definitely happy, too.

Although she enjoys her time in Star City, making friends while being CTO is harder than she anticipated. Felicity essentially has to start from scratch, which is easier said than done. Even though she’s lived here for nine months, Felicity hasn’t ventured much inside Star City, let alone walked around her entire neighborhood. There are times when she feels lonely, and it’s during those moments a small part of her wonders whether it was worth coming to Palmer Tech.

Despite having gone on a couple quasi-dates with Ray back in Chicago, Felicity eventually chose not to be in a relationship with Ray. It would look completely unprofessional if she had decided to be with Ray, and thankfully he understood how important her job was. Regardless, it didn’t hurt to occasionally flirt here and there, and he was a good business partner. For once, she feels appreciated and revered.

In the end, Felicity knows she would never have had this opportunity if she hadn’t left Kord. As CTO, she’s begun to work with engineers to create ways to help those with spinal injuries and several other projects that’ll change the world. Felicity’s actually eager to come to work, and coupled with Ray’s enthusiasm, the company is always buzzing with excitement.

She’s in a good place.

There’s a loud knock on her door, and before Felicity can tell the person to come in, Curtis Holt barges into the room looking nothing short of frazzled. Alarmed, Felicity stands up while her secretary comes running in, confused by Curtis’ antics.

Nodding at her secretary – Kendra – that everything’s all right, she focuses her attention on Curtis and asks, “What do you think you’re doing here?”

Ignoring her, Curtis – one of Palmer Tech’s most revered engineers – continues to pace back and forth her office. His hair is wild and it looks like he hasn’t slept, which is definitely a bad sign. “Are you OK?”

“No, no way, not. At. All.” Stopping right in front of her, he looks at her with I-haven’t-slept-in-five-days eyes and whispers, “It’s done.”

Felicity’s heart begins to pound as she can only imagine what went wrong. “What’s done?” she asks carefully. A thousand scenarios run through her head, all of which end badly. So many things could be “done” buy Curtis’ definition that she can’t think.

“The chip. It’s totally done for like my late grandmother – bless her but not really because she was a little mean – and I don’t even know what we’re going to do because even I’m having a hard time trying to find a solution for this, and basically I need you A. S. A. P.”

Frack.

The spinal chip meant to save the world has had a lot of hiccups from the very beginning, ranging from lab disasters to not being able to get the funding they needed from investors. But seeing Curtis so uninhibited means something really went wrong, and there’s zero time to waste.

Grabbing her phone – and promptly dropping it before she picks it up again – Felicity kicks off her heels, getting ready for battle. “We’re going. Now.”

“Aye, Captain!” Curtis bolts out of there with Felicity in tow, as she tries not to slip on the marble floors due to her tights. She and Curtis run past Kendra and she looks at them with bewilderment, shocked to see her boss running in the halls of Palmer Tech.

“Miss Smoak! You have a meet–”

“Not now Kendra!” Felicity yells as she dodges her coworkers. She can only imagine how she looks with a tight fitted skirt while running down the hall at full speed. Curtis, being unnaturally tall, is almost at the elevators and she hates him for having a biological advantage over her. “Cancel everything today! And tomorrow!”

Thankfully Curtis is already inside the elevator holding the door for her and she runs inside, desperate to go down to the R&D floor. Realizing she forgot to say something else to Kendra, she sticks her head out the elevator and hollers, “And for the foreseeable future!”

She only manages to just bring her head back inside before the elevator doors close on her face, and it isn’t until Felicity hears how loud they’re breathing that she realizes the absurdity of the situation. Laughing, Felicity bends a little and places her hands on her knees, trying to regain her breath.

Curtis’ looks up at the ceiling to control his heavy breathing and says, “It’s the first time I’ve ran in six months.”

She laughs again and Curtis joins her, as she has no doubt they’re both wondering how they still have a job.

There’s never a dull moment at Palmer Tech and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

~/~

“If it makes you feel better, Hartley got a little too cocky with Ted Kord at the gala last week and got his butt kicked. For once he’s not walking around with a stick up his ass,” Caitlin muses.

Laughing at Hartley’s demise, Felicity continues to walk towards her house (a real, actual house that’s almost one hundred years old and large enough to fit a family of five), dodging runners and people casually walking about. The weather has gotten a little chilly and for the past week it was raining, but today the sun is out and warming everyone’s hearts.

Gripping the phone tighter, Felicity slows her stride and stands to the side, leaning against a brick wall as she continues her conversation with Caitlin. “I don’t think you have any idea how happy I am! You know what they say: karma’s a bitch.”

Chuckling alongside her Caitlin adds, “And the best part? He hasn’t come into my office since last week!”

“Finding out Hartley got his ass handed to him is probably the best thing I’ve heard in forever.”

“I knew this would be a better present than me coming to visit you.”

Stepping away from the wall, Felicity starts to walk when she spots a sign with a menu listed on it. Glancing to the side, she sees a small deli shop and wonders if she should waste time and buy something to eat. Looking back at the menu, Felicity scans it until she spots a four-cheese soufflé as their special.

Oh, I should send a picture to Oliver –

There’s a slight twinge of nostalgia and sadness in her chest, reminding her she can no longer do it anymore. Felicity can’t call him up and talk to him about the latest movie she saw, or joke about random things she’s seen on the Internet. She can’t sprawl all over his couch and complain about work and laugh at his escort stories. There’s no one to hang out with on Wednesdays and Sundays anymore.

There’s no Oliver in her life.

Almost every day Felicity catches herself thinking about him, usually when she sees something which reminds her of Oliver. She wonders if he’s OK and if he’s still working at Emerald, but moments later Felicity remembers she’s in no position to think about him anymore. She has to deal with the consequences of her decision.

No amount of success and money can make up for the fact that Felicity chose to run away from her problems instead of fixing them. But Felicity wasn’t prepared to find out Oliver Jones was, in fact, Oliver Queen. And in her panicked and angry state, she felt Oliver was using her to sustain a picture-perfect friendship, which was anything but perfect, and she pushed him away without talking to him like a mature adult.

It felt like a literal kick to the gut when she found out the truth, but there was also a sense of relief. She finally knew why he was so secretive, why he hated Ray, and (in Felicity’s eyes) seemed to be jealous of her accomplishments while he was stuck as an escort. Felicity’s no stranger to secrets, but when Oliver’s began to impact their friendship, she knew something was up. And sometimes Felicity hated being right.

After Oliver revealed everything to her, she quickly began to put the pieces together but she couldn’t help but wonder: had he ever planned on telling her? Evidence proved otherwise. Everything about Oliver’s behavior made sense, yet deep down Felicity knows she never really knew him. And it hurt her. She spent more time with him than anyone else, opened up to him for the first time since Cooper, and all she got was a box of lies.

So, in her anger Felicity left without patching things up between them, hoping a new environment would permanently erase any memory she had of Oliver.

Clearly her plan failed.

Yet, despite feeling lonely and wondering if she made the worst mistake ever, Felicity knows her feelings were justified. Had they not talked (or yelled) about their differences, they probably would’ve continued to be at odds with one another. In the end, their friendship would have dissolved like any other, to where their weekly hangouts would’ve turned into monthly, and eventually nothing at all. Their argument was a necessary evil, Felicity concludes, but one that still haunts her to this day.

“Hello, Felicity? Are you there?”

She hadn’t realized she spaced out, and honestly forgotten she was on the phone with Caitlin. Her heart still beating at an abnormal pace, Felicity reluctantly tears her eyes away from the menu as a pang of disappointment hits her.

“Yeah, sorry. I . . . never mind.”

Oblivious to Felicity’s inner turmoil Caitlin continues to chat, but Felicity can’t bring herself to pretend everything is OK. Regardless, she pushes through and swallows her feelings, marching forward into the unknown just as she’s always done. Even if it hurts to do so.

~/~

It’s Thursday now, and for the first time this week Felicity’s spent her entire day at her office. After the fiasco regarding the spinal chip, Felicity’s stayed at the R&D department to make sure everything was running smoothly. They found a whole slew of other problems, so Felicity’s been running on coffee and adrenaline for the past few days.

Needing another cup of Joe, Felicity heads to the kitchen and is surprised to find a couple of the secretaries there. Muttering a “Hello” Felicity goes straight to the coffee machine, only to find it completely empty.

I hate my life.

“Sorry Miss Smoak, I usually refill it but I thought everyone left,” she hears Victoria, Ray’s executive assistant, say.

Turning around, Felicity smiles tiredly at Victoria and another secretary, Carly, to let them know everything is fine. “I guess it’s a sign I should stop drinking coffee and go home, but I’m clearly an addict and don’t know how to stop.”

The girls laugh politely at Felicity’s lame small talk and return back to gossiping before her presence interrupted them. She busies herself by setting up the coffee machine when she suddenly hears an Oliver mentioned in the conversation. Her heart pounding, Felicity wonders if it’s Oliver Queen or someone else – yet deep down, she has a feeling it might be her Oliver.

Straining her ears to hear more, Felicity angles herself so that she’s a little closer and can listen to what they’re saying.

“I can’t believe you saw him! What did he look like? I used to have a major crush on him,” Carly says.

Victoria laughs and Felicity can imagine her shaking her head in disbelief. “He’s so hot now. He’s got a scruff, he’s super built, and ugh I’m drooling at the thought of him.”

So it is Oliver’s they’re talking about, and Felicity’s powerless to stop her legs from shaking. What’s he doing back in Star City and for how long has he been here? When Felicity last saw him, she was convinced he planned on being stuck as an escort for the foreseeable future. This information is sending her in a tailspin.

Confused by the turn of events, she tries to calm herself and listen once more to what Victoria has to say.

“Anyway, he was hanging out with Tommy Merlyn the whole night. I think he’s moved back permanently. I wonder what he was doing for all those years,” Victoria muses.

Felicity’s met Tommy at a Merlyn Global event, as it was obvious Malcolm Merlyn was trying to set the two of them up. Obviously nothing happened, but she can see why Oliver would be his friend. During her brief research session, she saw several tabloid articles detailing Oliver and Tommy’s panache for debauchery.

Deciding she’s had enough, Felicity doesn’t wait for the coffee to be done and heads straight to her office. Her mind reeling, Felicity shuts the door to her office and lies down on her couch, trying to even her breathing but to no avail. She doesn’t know what to think, other than Oliver Queen is back in town to disrupt her life.

Or maybe make it better.

In a twist of fate, this feels like a second chance to Felicity. She’s been feeling so guilty as of late, and misses Oliver more than she misses her father, more than she ever missed Cooper. There’s an emptiness in her heart, and she knows it’s due to not ending things with Oliver on a good note. What she needs is closure – their fight was a mess and Felicity didn’t get a chance to articulate what was on her mind. If they meet, maybe they can hash things out like adults . . . and possibly reconnect on better terms.

She wants to reconcile with Oliver more than anything. These past few months have given her plenty of time to dissect every second of their argument, and she’s come to conclusion they should at least talk. Yes, Felicity was deeply hurt, but she can see why he kept the information away from her. He was scared of opening up and Felicity shouldn’t blame him. She can only imagine how difficult his life has been, from starting off as a wealthy playboy to suddenly becoming a nobody having to whore himself in order to pay the bills. His pride wounded, Felicity understands why Oliver disliked Ray, even if the only thing Ray did was take over QC. Oliver’s future was stripped away from him without a moment’s notice and he’s barely hanging on.

Perhaps now that he’s back and they’ve aired their dirty laundry, they can move on from the past.

But she’s getting ahead of herself – Felicity needs to reach out to Oliver first. She owes him that. Sitting up on the couch, Felicity reaches for her cellphone and immediately searches for his number, even though her hand is shaking from doing so.

She can’t believe it – it’s happening. She’s actually doing this. For nine months Felicity’s taken out her phone various times so she could apologize, yet every time she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Coupled with her guilt and cowardice, Felicity held off on being the bigger person, but it’s time for a change.

She doesn’t know what she’ll say to him, and for a moment she stops herself from dialing his number. Sighing heavily, Felicity knows if she waits a second longer she won’t call him. For someone who prides herself in being strong, Felicity is undoubtedly weak when it comes to emotions.

Swallowing thickly and gathering whatever courage she has, Felicity dials his number and anxiously waits to see what happens next. Her vision blurs from being overwhelmed by an onslaught of emotions, and she prays Oliver won’t be able to hear her heart obnoxiously beat through the phone.

It rings once until she hears a beep, followed by “I’m sorry, the number you have dialed is unavailable.” Shutting the phone, Felicity sighs in relief and leans back on the couch to calm her nerves. She doesn’t want to be relieved Oliver’s ditched his old phone number, and therefore can’t talk to him, but she feels she dodged a bullet. Calling him now isn’t the right time.

One way or another, Felicity knows has to make amends with Oliver. She shouldn’t take this as an opportunity to not seek out Oliver at all, but perhaps she should focus on what she’ll say once she meets him . . . Whenever that happens.

~/~

It’s been a couple of weeks since Felicity found out about Oliver being in town. Once she realized he was back, Felicity promptly spent the next few days combing through the Internet, and found various articles on gossip sites discussing his new look and speculating on what he did for the eight years he was gone. Felicity wonders if people will find out about Oliver’s time as an escort and the thought worries her. It’s possible Oliver may no longer be ashamed for working as an escort, which is why he’s back in Star City. Yet, despite several valiant efforts from rabid fangirls and smarmy reporters, no one has a clue what he did during those eight missing years.

Despite her constant researching, she still hasn’t made an effort to contact Oliver. There’s a part of her afraid he’ll turn her away after what she did to him. She can’t call herself a strong, mature adult when she’s scared shitless to approach Oliver. If she doesn’t speak to him it would make her a hypocrite, and that’s the last thing Felicity wants to be known as.

She just – all she needs is practice. If Felicity doesn’t practice in front of a mirror and spend a few hours writing down what she wants to say to Oliver, she’ll definitely be a blubbering mess and she can’t afford for it to happen. Felicity likes to prepare for every situation and this is no different.

Which is why she’s completely shocked and petrified when she sees Oliver outside a building in the Glades on a cold Saturday afternoon, painting on the side of the wall with a serene smile on his face.

Her heart does a strange pitter-patter and her breathing gets shallower by the second, while her mind races with confusion. She’s bundled up in winter gear since it’s November, but she’s suddenly sweating buckets and doesn’t know if she should strip and wave hello, or get the hell out of here.

See, this is why Felicity needs practice and a blueprint for her life, because when things like Oliver randomly appearing in her line of sight happens, she loses her brain and the ability to function.

He’s looking at her like she’s the sun, never mind the fact they had a huge fight and haven’t spoken in nine months. And for a moment, Felicity feels so good just seeing him that she thinks no time has passed.

For a split second, Felicity imagines herself running into his arms and pretending everything’s all right between them. But reality is much different and instead she takes slow, robotic steps toward him, unsure of how close she can get to him.

Oliver drops his paintbrush and cautiously steps forward as if he’s trying not to scare her. And maybe that’s a good thing – as familiar as Oliver feels, there’s a distance between them caused by their unfortunate rift. It aches to see how far apart they are now, how the air is laced with trepidation, but maybe this can change.

At least she hopes so.

They finally stop moving towards one another, careful not to overstep their boundaries. Her curiosity getting the better of her, Felicity takes a good look at Oliver and notices a certain bit of lightness to him. His shoulders aren’t tight and ridged, his lips aren’t pursed in thoughtfulness and his eyes . . . they’re wide open, like it’s the first time he’s seeing the world.

Without a doubt, Felicity knows these past nine months have changed Oliver, and she’s unbelievably proud of him.

She can’t stop herself letting out a relieved smile, because all she’s ever wanted for him is to be the man he can be. Felicity can only imagine the emotional toll it took on Oliver to be an escort for so many years, and she’s glad to see him happy for once.

“Hey, Oliver.” Saying his name out loud feels foreign to her mind but familiar to her tongue. Her brain can try to push Oliver’s memory away from her, but every inch of her body and soul will always remember.

“Felicity.”

He’s bundled up as well, but there’s some paint littered on his jeans and his nose is red from the cold. Shuffling his feet, Oliver shyly glances down before looking at Felicity. “It’s good to see you.”

It’s good to see him, too. “Yeah” is all she can muster, as her mouth – for once – is unable to embarrass her any further.

There’s an awkward pause, and in order to distract herself she looks at everywhere but him. For the first time Felicity notices where she’s at – the building Oliver was painting on appears to be a small business, maybe a coffee shop. It doesn’t look like it has opened yet, she spots equipment, tables and chairs scattered about inside. Her heart leaps as her mind wonders whether Oliver came back to start a business, one that doesn’t require illegal activities.

Over to the side she spots someone watching them, and as she takes a good look she realizes it’s Tommy Merlyn. It feels a little weird to be speaking with Oliver when she’s also met Tommy, and especially since he seems to be spying on them. Felicity sees no one else inside the building or around it, which makes her feel a little better, but she’s still nervous.

Realizing it’s been silent for a good ten seconds, Felicity takes a deep breath and rocks on her heels, unsure of what she wants to say.

“I . . . called but your phone isn’t . . . working anymore. It’s been disconnected. Obviously.” She feels herself blushing, which is stupid and annoying. She needs to be stronger than this.

“Uh yeah, sorry about that.” Oliver exhales loudly and adds, “After I moved back I changed numbers. I was getting . . . calls. Ones I didn’t need anymore.”

Her eyes snap up to his and Felicity immediately understands what he’s getting at. It seems Oliver’s officially stopped being an escort, and really did intend to come here as a fresh restart. And she’s happy for him.

She sees him in a new light now. Felicity was convinced Oliver didn’t care about moving forward, or was so focused on being stuck in his misery, but she was so damn wrong about him. Life pushes unwanted circumstances onto so many people, and some get dealt with a horrible hand – Oliver was one of them. To see him in the process of (possibly) opening a business means he’s taken control of his destiny, and for that, Felicity is unbelievably proud of him.

“Oh, gotcha.” Nervous once again, Felicity counts backwards from three to control her word vomit, since she’s positive she’ll say something totally embarrassing, but she has a feeling she’s only delaying the inevitable.

Oliver shuffles his feet once more and shoves his hands inside his coat pockets. Felicity steals a quick glance at him, and she’s once more annoyed-yet-slightly-happy Oliver is as handsome as he is. But it’s how his eyes are devoid of any haunted memories, which gives her a pause for thought.

Oliver’s become the man he was meant to be, and she’s so glad to have gotten a chance to witness it.

“Hey, uh, I’m opening a café – this café, actually – next Saturday.” He’s nervous too – maybe their breakup affected him more than she thought, because Oliver is anything but nervous. “I’d . . . really like it if you could come by.”

Her heart skips a beat, and an overwhelming feeling of hope etches into her skin. Although Felicity doesn’t want to expect something from Oliver’s invitation, as it could very well be him acting nice for the sake of being nice, she wants nothing more than to support Oliver in this endeavor. And if he’s inviting her because he wants to become friends with her, then she should definitely take this opportunity to mend old wounds.

“I might have some company event to go to . . . but I’ll try to make it.”

Lies.

Why is she being so difficult? She spots the exact moment Oliver’s face falls, and she wants to kick herself in the face, even if it is impossible to do so. This is what she’s wanted for so long – a chance to make up and get closure, and now she’s throwing it away. Felicity doesn’t understand why she’s pretending to not care as much as she does, but it pisses her off to the point she can’t think clearly.

She’s about to rescind her comment until Oliver nods. “That’s fine.”

Shrugging then taking a deep breath, he smiles gently and Felicity’s in awe of how unbothered he is. “It was . . . really nice seeing you, Felicity. I hope you can come.”

For some reason her throat closes up, and she can only nod before tears threaten to spill over. Oliver smiles softly once more before turning around to finish painting the wall. She watches him walk toward his friend, his steps carefree and light, and for a moment Felicity wishes she met Oliver when he was like this. But she knows if she didn’t, then she wouldn’t appreciate the struggle he’s gone through, and for that she is forever grateful.

Turning around, Felicity composes herself as she takes long, deep breaths. Today was unexpected and she needs time to think about what happened with a big bottle of wine.

As she starts to walk away from Oliver, she hears Tommy loudly ask, “Dude, how do you know Felicity Smoak?”

Well, wouldn’t he like to know.

~/~

The obnoxious wall clock Felicity bought on a whim ticks incessantly, its sound getting louder and louder as the hour hand inches toward six o’clock. She’s spent the last four hours following Twitter mentions of Oliver’s café opening, searching for something but she doesn’t know what. According to visitors, Tommy Merlyn and Thea Queen – Oliver’s sister – are working there and hundreds of people have come. A line started to form an hour before the café – Nocking Point – opened, and since then it’s been nonstop traffic.

She debated going there, but chickened out no less than seven times. Felicity doesn’t know why she’s having a hard time going, especially since this is what she’s wanted for a long time, and Oliver personally invited her. There’s a part of her deathly afraid of the possibility of not getting together as friends or . . . something more.

After finding out Oliver’s no longer a prostitute, her mind wouldn’t stop thinking about what ifs. What if she and Oliver get together? What if they turn into something more than friends? What if their relationship is really good? What if it’s not? It’s the first time she’s allowed herself to think of these questions and they’re making her dizzy.

During the course of their friendship, Felicity found someone who made her happy and excited and less lonely. It was different – she had been intimate with him before she knew him. Oliver saw a part of her very few people did and that will forever tie her to him. And amidst all the weirdness, they became fast friends over the mundane aspects of their lives.

But Felicity held herself back. She didn’t let herself get too attached to Oliver in fear of totally falling in love with him, or forcing him away with her neediness. There were times when she teetered back and forth, unsure if what she felt for him was her projecting a romantic relationship on a friendship because she was lonely, or whether underneath their easy smiles there was something hidden there. In the end she pushed it away, believing their delicate, easy friendship and her career were more important. Felicity didn’t want to disrupt that balance.

Now . . . she doesn’t know what to think. Oliver’s working legally – he has his own business. Felicity didn’t think something she mentioned in passing would actually happen but it did, and he seems happier, less anxious. And, coupled with knowing who Oliver really is, maybe it’s not as unfathomable to be with him.

Letting out a strangled breath, Felicity admits she wants to be with him. She wants to be his girlfriend. She . . . loves him.

The last thought gives her pause, but it’s so honest it aches to admit it. Oliver withholding his secrets from her hurt her more than usual because she cared – cares – about him. A lot. If Oliver were any other friend she wouldn’t have exploded on him as she did, but Oliver was more than a regular friend and it destroyed her when he lied. She thought there was a closeness and understanding, and when Oliver said otherwise, it crushed her soul and any self-esteem she had.

Their breakup has affected Felicity more than she thought, and after seeing Oliver so carefree she wants nothing more than to be a part of it. Nothing’s holding them back – they’re free from societal expectations, shame, embarrassment and stubbornness. For so long Felicity’s been denying the truth, but she has to face it head on.

And tonight is the perfect night.

Without wasting another second, Felicity gathers her coat and purse, her confidence increasing as she realizes she’s this close to meeting Oliver again. Taking her car, Felicity speeds her way to his café and hopes he hasn’t left yet. The shop closed at 5:30 – it’s possible Oliver’s already gone home. This causes Felicity to drive faster, not caring about breaking any traffic rules.

As she speeds along Star City’s streets, she can’t help but snort at how very rom-com this is. Felicity half expects Nora Ephron to jump out of nowhere and direct her reunion with Oliver, and there’s a part of her slightly giddy at the thought of seeing him and telling Oliver her feelings about him. She’s no doubt scared – her mind is an Internet browser with a thousand tabs open, but Felicity plans on going there and being honest.

If things don’t work out between them, or they’re able to forgive one another but it’s still too hard to move on, then she’ll be OK with it. At the end of the day, she hopes they’ll get the closure they need and can look back at their friendship with fondness instead of bittersweet nostalgia.

Lost in her thoughts, Felicity almost misses the café before she screeches to a halt. Luckily she’s able to find parking nearby, but once she kills the engine Felicity’s courage vanishes into thin air. Her mouth pools with saliva, her palms moisten in fear, and she feels her confidence waning.

Glancing at her phone, she sees that it’s already 6:30 and another dose of panic hits her. Oliver could very well be gone, and she’ll have missed her chance to tell Oliver how she feels about him. Inhaling deeply, Felicity checks whatever makeup she has remaining on her face, but she stops for a moment to look at herself. For the first time in awhile, Felicity seems . . . excited. It’s like she’s been on a month long vacation and the summertime glow hasn’t faded away yet.

Felicity does her best to shake her nervousness away and exits the car, because it’s now or never. As she inches closer to the café, she sees the lights are off and her heart drops in disappointment. If Oliver’s not here this will all have been in a waste, and she has to wonder when she’ll get another perfect moment like this. Hugging her coat closer, Felicity stops in front of the café and tugs on the door, finding it locked. Undeterred, she goes over to the window and presses her face against it, hoping someone – preferably Oliver – is inside.

And he is.

He’s sitting on one of the chairs, looking over some papers as his head is bowed in concentration. His collared shirt doesn’t even try to cover his impressive physique, and Felicity finds it endearing there’s a tiny apron wrapped around him.

She spends another few seconds watching him from afar, but her private peep show is over the moment Oliver’s head snaps up and his eyes land on her. Feeling like she got busted for doing something wrong, Felicity blushes furiously and awkwardly waves at him – she can only imagine how weird this looks. He doesn’t move for a moment, no doubt shocked she’s here, but Oliver quickly springs to actions and practically runs to the door.

Felicity can hear him fussing with the lock, and when he manages to unlock it the door swings wide open as Oliver holds it. He’s smiling and Felicity’s heart leaps – he looks so happy and good here. An overwhelming desire to hug him grabs a hold of her, but Felicity manages to restrain herself. Now’s not the time to freak him out.

“Felicity.”

He says it with such wonder, curiosity and something else that she can’t think. There are times when Felicity’s convinced Oliver says her name like it’s a sentence; as if there are too many words to accurately describe what he’s feeling, so he pours it all into saying her name with whatever emotions grab him.

She missed him. So much.

“Mind if I come in?”

“Depends. Do you plan on buying anything?”

Felicity’s suddenly reminded of their Sundays at Jitters, and she can’t stop herself from grinning like an idiot. “If it’s any good.”

Oliver laughs and it’s absolute heaven to her ears. “I guess you’ll see for yourself.”

Beckoning her to come inside, Felicity steps forward and enters the café, keenly aware of how close Oliver is. He shuts the door behind her and clasps his hands as she surveys the space. “Anything in particular you’d like?”

She’s quiet for a moment as she digests everything in. The café is stunning. It’s modern yet classic, with hints of green tastefully peeking out. There’s a corner dedicated to large, comfy sofas, the chairs and tables are sleek, and coupled with a brick wall Felicity has no doubt this will become the latest hipster spot in Star City. It’s clearly a labor of love and Felicity wants this to succeed as much as Oliver does. He deserves it.

“Oliver, this is amazing,” her voice laced with equal amounts of awe and excitement. She can’t wait to see what’s in store for him.

Turning around, she fondly looks at him but he’s bashfully staring at the ground. A small grin creeps up to her lips and Felicity says, “I’m really proud of you.”

He takes a deep breath and shakes his head as he shoves his hands in his pockets. “Thanks.”

The air is suddenly rife with tension and unspoken admissions, and Felicity finds herself awkwardly standing there. “Can I sit?”

Oliver nods and waves his hand around the café’s general direction. “Take your pick.”

Sitting down at the table nearest to her, Felicity takes off her coat and continues to admire the café. Her eyes touch upon the paintings and vintage posters on the walls – she spots a poster for The Adventures of Robin Hood, and briefly wonders if Oliver put it up there on purpose, especially since it’s her go-to background movie to play during the weekends.

Maybe she shouldn’t read too much into things.

“You still didn’t tell me what you want.”

Snapping out of her daze, Felicity shrugs because she knows anything Oliver gives her will be delicious. “Surprise me.”

Nodding once more, Oliver smirks knowingly and heads to the kitchen, while Felicity tries to rehearse what she’ll say to him. Unfortunately the gorgeous location keeps distracting her.

She had expected the café to look and feel great, but she didn’t expect how amazing it turned out to be. It feels comfortable and familiar; all this place needs is a bed and Felicity could easily call it home. There’s a lingering smell of cookies and other food, and for a moment Felicity feels she could sleep here without another thought.

A couple of minutes later Oliver reemerges from the kitchen with two plates. As he gets closer, she grins at how serendipitous this is – of all the things Oliver chose to bring out, it’s a soufflé, and a chocolate one at that. He smiles at her and places the soufflés on the table, settling down next to her. Its aromatic smell makes her dizzy with exhilaration, and she sees that it’s been drizzled with chocolate on top of it.

“I feel like I’m on an episode of Top Chef.”

Oliver laughs tiredly and Felicity immediately feels guilty for coming so late. After all the craziness of today, she doesn’t doubt he’s exhausted and wants to sleep.

She’s tired, too. Tired from being sad, of wishing she could change the past, of her mistakes, and of being scared. Felicity tries so hard to be something else other than honest. She’ll run away as far as she can, push her feelings to the back of her mind believing they’ll only ruin her future, and in the end it leaves her broken.

Despite having a decadent soufflé in front of her, she doesn’t feel like eating it anymore as her thoughts continue to cloud her mind. But once she takes one savory bite, Felicity can’t help but moan as its flavors make her mouth dance in ecstasy. It’s soft, warm and gooey on the inside, and it’s quite possibly the best soufflé she’s ever tried.

“Do you like it?” Oliver grins, no doubt amused by her reaction.

“Are you kidding?” she says with a mouthful of food in her mouth. Swallowing, she immediately digs her spoon inside for another bite. “I could eat this for breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

Smiling once more, Oliver stays silent as Felicity continues to eat. He doesn’t touch his own soufflé, and feeling a bit self-conscious, Felicity slows down and tries not to shove the entire thing in two seconds. It’s painfully quiet now, and in order to not embarrass herself she takes one more bite.

“I’m glad you came.” His confession startles Felicity – glancing up at him, she’s surprised to see how sincere he is. “I was . . . worried you wouldn’t.”

Crap – she feels bad for getting his hopes up and crushing it. But now that Oliver’s being honest, Felicity knows she can’t continue to skirt around the truth anymore. If he can open up to her then so can she. Still, it causes a rush of adrenaline and nervousness, and Felicity does her best not to freak herself – and Oliver – out.

“Yeah I . . . I – I didn’t have anywhere to go.” She spots Oliver’s eyebrows rise slightly, and for a moment she feels she’s about to get reprimanded by her mother.

“I wore PJs the whole day and stalked you on Twitter.” Realizing how horrible it sounds, Felicity tries to remedy her faux pas even though she knows it’s pointless. “I mean your Twitter mentions. Mentions on Twitter about you.”

Frack. She really can’t go a minute without embarrassing herself, can she? Her skin burns in humiliation, and closing her eyes, Felicity collects herself before saying what she really meant. Oliver’s got a hint of a smile forming on his lips, and his reaction makes her marginally feel better.

Taking a deep breath, Felicity pushes the soufflé aside and puts her thoughts in order. “I’m sorry. I guess I . . . just didn’t want to show you how much I . . . “ Missed you. So much.

It’s at the tip of her tongue, and God, she wants to tell him how much she missed him. But it doesn’t feel like the right moment, and she swallows her confession away, unsure of when she’ll get the chance to say it. There are several other things she needs to tell him first.

Sensing her hesitation, Oliver purses his lips and slightly turns his chair towards Felicity. She can tell he’s trying to find the right words to say, and she patiently waits for him, just as he’s done a million other times. The silence doesn’t feel unbearable but there’s a layer of unsaid words begging to be let out.

“Felicity, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was back in Star City.”

As his jaw tenses he glances at the floor, and Felicity wants nothing more than to make him feel better. She doesn’t know why he feels the need to apologize for not contacting her, since they fought and she made sure he wasn’t allowed to be in her life anymore. Sometimes Felicity wonders what causes Oliver to shoulder everyone’s burden, because he does it often.

She shrugs. “It’s OK.”

Oliver’s not having it. Shaking his head, he shifts in his seat as he gathers his thoughts. “I just – I needed to figure myself out.”

“Oh.”

She wonders what it means – figuring yourself out. Perhaps it means moving to another environment and pushing yourself until you can’t, until you’re so exhausted from running that you finally have to stop. Or maybe it means going back home and finding ways to come to terms with your past, present, and future.

Felicity doesn’t know if she’s figured herself out yet. She’s still stubborn, is prone to hacking when she knows she could go to jail for it, worries she’ll get abandoned by anyone and everyone at a moment’s notice, and can’t for the life of her want to workout. But she’s also figured out how to balance her work life, and how to stay calm in stressful situations. She knows her limits. She dresses better, she finds happiness in smaller things, and knows what it’s like to lose missed opportunities.

She’s lost, loved, and won. And that’s all part of figuring yourself out. Seeing Oliver take a chance and reevaluate who he is as a person encourages her to do the same. And maybe, just maybe, they can work this out.

For the first time since she woke up this morning, Felicity finally takes a moment to soak this all in and let fate take its course. She’s just . . . happy she’s here, sitting next to Oliver for the first time in months. It feels like things are starting to happen the way they’re supposed to – naturally and without expectations.

Glancing up at Oliver, she gives a shy smile before looking down at the table and toying with the napkin. She doesn’t know what to say, but she figures she should start small.

“How did you leave Chicago by the way? You know, with Emerald and all . . .”

Clearly, Felicity needs a lesson on how to start a conversation without going straight to the heavy stuff, but she is curious and wants to know.

Oliver takes a deep breath and stares off as his eyes harden. “Let’s just say Isabel won’t be a madam for the foreseeable future.”

Well, that was unexpected. “You know you can’t not finish the story,” she says with a laugh. “I’m dying to know the rest.”

He raises his eyebrows and fiddles with the spoon on his plate, his mouth pursing as he tries to find a way to tell Felicity the truth. She doesn’t know much about his time at Emerald – he would hardly talk about it unless there was something funny, and she finds herself wanting to know everything he kept hidden. Felicity wants him to know she’s there for him, and listening to every sordid detail is one place to start.

“I’m sure you remember me occasionally complaining about her. “ Felicity nods – there were only a handful of times Oliver slipped how it wasn’t so great to work at Emerald. “She wasn’t a good person. So I made sure she didn’t hurt anyone else.”

Felicity can only imagine what pushed Oliver to do something like that, but she trusts his judgment and knows if it weren’t Oliver, it would’ve been someone else who would send Isabel to jail.

“Good.”

Her steely response causes Oliver to look at her peculiarly, but as someone who’s seen the worst of humanity more times than she can count, Felicity’s glad Isabel won’t be able to prey on escorts anymore. They’re more alike than she realized.

Wanting to change the heavy subject, Felicity clears her throat and smiles awkwardly. “Anyway, how long have you been back?”

He seems thankful for the change of direction and quickly says, “Four months.”

A pang of disappointment hits her – he’s been here for this long and she didn’t know? In the back of her mind Felicity knows he didn’t contact her because he needed time for himself, but she wishes so much hadn’t passed.

“Oh. OK.”

Oliver notices the mood shift and explains, “I – I was going to . . . I got busy with opening this business and personal things.”

“Like I said, it’s fine.” She doesn’t want Oliver to feel bad when it’s not his fault to begin with. “It’s not like we were on speaking terms or anything.”

Giving her an odd look, he begins to rub his fingers and stares at the table. “Still.”

It annoys her Oliver feels it’s his fault for not contacting her – he shouldn’t blame himself for wanting some distance and taking time to focus on his wellbeing. Felicity’s tempted to press him, but things are a bit delicate right now and she wants things to go smoothly.

Clearing her throat once more, Felicity relaxes in her chair and looks around at the café, marveling once more at the décor. She feels the need to change the subject again and asks, “How did you manage to open a business in four months?”

He grins and stops rubbing his fingers. “It helps having friends in high places.”

Snorting, Felicity shakes her head but there’s a smile on her lips. “That doesn’t sound ominous whatsoever.”

A soft chuckle emanates from Oliver’s lips, and she’s suddenly reminded of how beautiful it sounds. She’s missed his smiles, laughs, and his presence by her side.

“How do you like Palmer Tech?”

“It’s great.” Tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear, she takes a deep breath and tries to find a way to tell Oliver how amazing it is. “I’m having fun, actually. We’re developing a spinal chip that’ll hopefully end any sort of paralysis, so . . . I’m doing big stuff.”

Cringing on the inside, she wonders how she managed to boil down her very important CTO role into “big stuff.” She might as well have finished the sentence with bigly and ended the night there.

“Wow, Felicity. That’s incredible.” Oliver’s eyes shine the same way they used to and for a moment she can’t breathe.

“Yeah, it is.”

Some days it doesn’t hit her she’s made it – she still thinks she’s back at MIT in her horrendous goth clothing, aching to make a difference in the world. There are days – months, even – when Felicity feels she hasn’t done her part yet. While she exceeds in one aspect of her life, she totally fails in the other. Yet through it all she’s trying and it’s all she could ask for.

It’s why she’s here in the middle of Oliver’s café, hoping she can make her past a little more bearable and her future a little more exciting.

“Oliver, I really do need to apologize. For how I ended things.”

Her breath stutters in her chest and her throat dries up in nervousness and anticipation. She’s waited months to tell him what she really feels, and she wants nothing more than to have everything go smoothly.

“You don’t.” Oliver looks a little scared, as if he doesn’t want to discuss how painful their breakup was.

“But I want to.”

“Felicity –”

Shaking her head, Felicity brings up a hand to signal him to stop. This is her time to tell him how she feels. Instead of yelling at him and asking what his last name is, she has to say what was – is – bothering her and how sorry she is.

Seemingly afraid of what she has to say, Oliver looks a little cautious but patiently waits.

Taking a deep breath, Felicity gathers her courage tries to stop her voice from wavering due to an overwhelming amount of emotions. She can feel her arms shaking from an overabundance of adrenaline, and curls her hands into small fists to control it. The moment she’s been waiting for is here – she can’t fuck this up.

“It – it really hurt me, when you lied. I thought we were so close. You were the first person in . . . a long time I was this close to, and I thought I was wrong.”

The air is rife with tension, and she has to shrug off her jacket so she’s not sweating buckets from nervousness. Oliver’s carefully watching her, but she has to focus on her thoughts and take this one step at a time.

“I know I wasn’t totally open with you. I – I thought as long as our . . . secrets weren’t brought up then there wasn’t a reason to mention it.”

Her heart loudly pounds deep beneath her chest to the point where it actually hurts her. Although Felicity told Oliver about her mother and growing up poor, she never told him about Cooper or her dad. Worse, she didn’t feel like they were in a stage to discuss their fears and insecurities, and Felicity chose not to take the first step in solidifying their friendship. She wonders what would’ve happened had she opened up to him first – she’s pretty sure they wouldn’t have gotten to this point.

“I just . . . I was OK with us not spilling our deepest secrets, as long as it didn’t impact us. But once yours did impact us, and when I found out everything, I felt . . . betrayed.”

Briefly, Felicity glances up to look at Oliver and she’s not prepared to see his face completely devoid of emotion. It kind of scares her how distant he is, but Felicity soldiers on and hopes her apology doesn’t push Oliver further away.

“But I could only imagine how hard it was for you, you know? Leading a double life and all. And how you probably wanted to keep your secrets to yourself because it hurt to think about them.”

She knows exactly how he felt, since it still hurts to think about her father and Cooper even after all these years. But unlike Oliver, Felicity managed to pull herself up and succeed despite everything, while he was literally and figuratively stuck being a prostitute. Their circumstances were different and she should’ve understood.

“I’m sorry for forcing it out of you. I’m sorry for leaving like I did.”

Black dots dance around her vision and Felicity suddenly remembers she needs to breathe – she immediately gulps as much air as she can, and tries to steady her racing heart. It feels like her chest might explode and her vision blurs from unshed tears. She’s equal parts relieved and anxious, and prays he doesn’t run for the nearest exit. But he hasn’t yet, and she thinks maybe he’s been waiting for a moment to tell her what he feels, too.

His mouth open and closes for several seconds until she can hear him take a deep breath. Shifting in his seat, Oliver leans forward and she’s hit with a whiff of his scent – a mix of cookies, chocolate, and something a bit woodsy. It’s uniquely him and Felicity wants nothing more than to be in his arms.

“Felicity, I’m glad you forced it out of me.” Her eyes snap up to his, surprised by his confession. “I probably wouldn’t have said anything until you did. I took advantage of the situation.”

She appreciates his honesty, and gives him a small smile to let Oliver know she doesn’t begrudge him for it.

“Still. I left like a kid who didn’t have their way.”

He laughs at her word choice then gazes off into the distance, which causes the atmosphere to shift back into something a little more serious. Felicity’s not done apologizing, and she vows to say everything that’s been on her mind for months.

“I hurt you by not introducing you to my friends, to the other side of my life.”

Shame begins to coat her skin, lighting every inch of it on fire, reminding her what she did to keep Oliver away was so damn wrong. Putting Oliver in a tiny box labeled “Only For Felicity’s Consumption” did nothing but push him further away, and she hates how much it hurt him. He had every right to be introduced to her work and other personal life. Felicity separated their friendship from other aspects of her life, because she didn’t want people’s judgments to ruin things between them and her career. It wasn’t fair to him.

“I kept you away because I valued my career over our friendship. And I’m really sorry.”

Tears prick her eyes and she rapidly blinks them away – she doesn’t want the waterworks to spill just yet when she’s not done with this conversation. Swallowing thickly, Felicity has to look away for a moment, because she doesn’t know if she can handle staring at Oliver right now. She wants nothing more than to be in his life, especially now when things are looking up for both of them, but she hopes her confessions won’t push him too far away.

Suddenly, Oliver shifts and scoots his chair closer to Felicity – she thinks he’s about to take her hand in his, but nothing happens. Instead, he stares straight into her soul, his cerulean eyes quickly moving back in forth as they search for something. Felicity thinks he’s looking for acceptance and she wishes he didn’t feel the need to ask in the first place.

“I’m sorry I hurt you, Felicity.” His voice wavers and Felicity wonders whether this has been as hard for him as it’s been for her, too.

“I should’ve told you . . . why Ray was bothering me.”

For a brief moment, Oliver’s eyes harden and she suspects it’s due to mentioning Ray. His reaction would’ve annoyed her before, but now that she knows the truth she understands why he has ill feelings toward him. At least Oliver’s come to learn how to separate his personal feelings from Felicity’s professional life, and for that she’s forever grateful.

“I shouldn’t have let my – my issues ruin an awesome opportunity for you. I attacked you when instead I should’ve been honest about why I was acting out.”

She can tell how sincere he is from the way his shoulders have dropped and how he never stops looking at her – even his fingers aren’t rubbing together, a nervous tick she’s seen time and time again. Seeing how different Oliver is now astounds her, and his journey to this point only encourages Felicity to make changes in her life as well.

“And I’m sorry for not telling you how I felt . . .” He hesitates then adds, “About all that. I really am.”

For months Felicity’s been aching to hear Oliver’s apology. She’s imagined a million different scenarios, all of them abruptly ending because she couldn’t ever dream of this moment happening. But instead of feeling a weight get lifted off her shoulders, she simply digests Oliver’s words without another thought. It’ll probably hit her when she’s back in her bed, going over this conversation on repeat, but for now Felicity’s satisfied they’re in a place to be this honest with one another.

It’s all she could ever ask for.

“I should’ve been honest about how you were hurting me, instead of letting my anger . . . boil over.”

“And I should’ve told you the truth.”

They smile shyly at one another, and in that moment Felicity just knows they’ve moved on. Whatever was bothering before will no longer have to power to control them, because the desire to be in each other’s lives is more important than focusing on the past.

“Now you can. If you want.”

I want to be there for you.

There’s a pregnant pause and Felicity’s afraid she may have pushed it too far. Oliver leans back against the chair and his eyes darken – whether it’s from sadness or anger, she doesn’t know. But Felicity wants him to know he can be honest with her and not worry about judgments, and most of all, not feel like he has to hide things from her.

He takes a deep breath and shakes his head, like he’s trying to rid his head of certain memories. Looking off into the distance, Oliver starts to rub his fingers and Felicity knows things are going to get serious.

“The night before our movie hangout, I was called to join a house orgy.”

She sees Oliver swallow thickly and she can imagine how difficult this may be for him. Felicity almost wants to take back her offer, but they’re already being so open with each other – it would be a shame to revert back to who they were a mere ten minutes ago.

“And instead I saw . . . a young escort getting assaulted. She was barely eighteen, Felicity.”

Shaking his head once more, Oliver lets out a breath and looks down at the floor. His shoulders sag and in this moment he looks so defeated. She wants to tell him to stop or even hug him, because this is obviously hurting him. But suddenly, he sits right back up and looks at Felicity, his face betraying no hint of emotion. She doesn’t know what to think of this mood change, but chooses to wait and see what happens.

“When I went to Isabel, she . . . You have to understand, the girl was going to be indebted to Isabel forever. She would’ve never been able to get out from Isabel’s grasp.”

Felicity quickly digests the information in, and she’s hit with such sadness and pity she doesn’t know what to think. It appears Emerald was a mafia, with Isabel in charge of destroying people’s lives and stuffing her bank account. For Isabel to use young girls and keep them as modern day slaves is nothing short of disgusting. Now Felicity understands why Isabel’s in jail.

“So I had to do something to keep her safe.”

He’s seen so much – from having his money, parents and house snatched away from him to becoming an illegal escort under a literal mob boss. After all these months, Felicity understands why Oliver wouldn’t speak about his time at Emerald: it was too painful. And she feels so fucking guilty for asking him to open the can of worms. She should’ve known what his silence meant, why he only shared funny escort stories, why he did whatever he could to get Felicity talking so he could focus on something other than his horrid job.

“I’m sorry that happened to the escort . . . and to you.”

Oliver probably doesn’t want Felicity’s pity but she can’t help feeling that way. She wishes he didn’t have to go through all of it, yet she’s glad he had the courage to take down Isabel in a way he saw fit.

Unaware of Felicity’s inner turmoil he simply shrugs. “And another escort I was mentoring overdosed the following night,” his voice grave as he recounts the incident.

Holy shit. No wonder he looked so haunted on their last movie night, and worse for wear the following Saturday, on the day of their fateful fight. She remembers how off he seemed. She took his sullen silences as him being jealous of her, Ray and a million other stupid things, but he was quietly suffering the whole time. And she freaking spent that time fighting with him.

God, how bitchy could Felicity be? She made it all about her when it was anything but that. Granted, Oliver not telling her the truth made things a bit more complicated – it certainly would’ve stopped Felicity from accusing him of numerous things – but she just wishes she knew before blowing up on him.

She’s feeling nothing short of guilty. This whole debacle could’ve been avoided had they been honest with each other, but everything seems preventable in hindsight. Maybe Felicity had to lose Oliver in order to really appreciate him.

“I could’ve . . . You know I’m there for you, right?”

Her voice drops an octave and she finds herself whispering – there’s a part of her wanting him to know how serious she is, but most of all, this promise is only meant for him. There’s no one else she’s willing to stand through thick and thin for. Oliver has to know this.

Oliver’s mouth twitches as he leans forward, clasping his hands in his lap and watching her intently. The way Oliver’s looking at her reminds her of their Sundays at Jitters and Wednesdays curled up in each other’s couches, and it’s so familiar that Felicity almost cries at the thought of it. Her heart stops and restarts, her stomach doing flip-flops without her permission and she feels complete.

“Yeah.”

They fall into an easy silence, and Felicity doesn’t know how long they simply stare at one another. It should make her feel awkward but it doesn’t – it’s like coming home. She can feel her cheeks heating up, though she doesn’t know why, and immediately looks away to cover it up.

The spell now broken, Oliver ostentatiously clears his throat before saying, “I – you were right, about me wanting to keep our friendship a fantasy.”

Of all the things Oliver could’ve said, this was a bit unexpected. She doesn’t know how to respond to it, and firmly keeps her mouth shut before she embarrasses herself.

Oliver glances down at his hands and shakes his head as he does so. “I didn’t want to tell you about work because work didn’t exist between us.”

He struggles for a moment – his brows furrow and Felicity suddenly has an itch to smooth it over and take his worries away from him.

“I wasn’t happy at Emerald . . . I wasn’t happy in general.” Shrugging, Oliver smiles sadly and continues, “And I didn’t want my job being the topic of our discussions whenever we were together.”

Her chest pinches painfully and it takes every bit of strength not to launch at him. There’s a chance Oliver was severely depressed back in Chicago and she only made things worse for him by pushing him to open up. Yet, hearing how their friendship made him happier warms her body and soul, and she just knows they’re meant to be in each other’s lives.

“Sometimes I wondered why you hung out with me, you know? I was a nobody.” Felicity snorts but when Oliver’s silent she realizes how much it hurt him to be a prostitute. Naturally, his profession forced him to be isolated and prevented him from having a well-rounded social life, but despite all of it, he was – is – somebody to her.

“I was an uneducated former playboy turned escort.” Blowing a breath, Oliver briefly begins to rub his fingers, and Felicity can only imagine what’s going on in his head.

“I – I felt abandoned when I heard you were hanging out with Ray, or with your other friends.” Scoffing, he inhales deeply and rubs the back of his neck. “Which is . . . stupid, since you’re allowed to have a life.”

Combined with refusing to introduce Oliver to her friends and keeping their friendship in a small bubble, Felicity hadn’t realized how her social life clashed with Oliver’s nonexistent one. From what she can gather he spent most of his time with her, so it’s understandable why Oliver would feel that way. In an ironic twist, it’s Oliver who felt abandoned even though Felicity constantly worried it might happen to her.

“If it makes you feel better, I only met Ray twice after I saw him at the gala.”

Oliver blinks rapidly. “Oh.”

She feels the need to tell him she enjoyed hanging out with him, and that whenever she spent time with her friends they didn’t hold a candle to spending time with Oliver. “I never meant to blow you off when I hung out with my friends.”

“I know that now.” He nods solemnly and his eyebrows furrow once more in contemplation.

Hearing how Oliver felt about Felicity’s social life reminds her of last Saturday, when she saw Oliver for the first time in months. Seeing him blissfully painting away and starting a business without her knowledge made her jealous. She wanted – wants – to be a part of his life, and now she knows why Oliver felt abandoned in Chicago.

“You know, when we ran into each other last week, I saw how happy you were without me, and I guess I . . . finally realized you didn’t need me. I got . . .” Toying with the hem of her shirt, Felicity searches for another word besides jealous except she can’t. She doesn’t want to say the word in fear of making things awkward.

Oliver Hmms and when she looks up at him he’s staring thoughtfully out into the distance. It used to bother her so much when he would look away, because it usually signaled the end of a conversation. But times are different now, and she can’t be more proud of them for being able to open up like this.

“It’s funny – I thought the same thing back in Chicago,” he casually admits. This night has been filled with confessions and apologies, but Felicity’s glad they’re at a point where they can hash things out as adults.

“It made me – what’s the word – not sad, but frustrated to see you having a life.” Felicity quizzically looks at him, but he only grins lopsided at her, her heart skipping a beat as he does so.

“I wasn’t jealous, but I knew you went to work, had fun and were excited about it. Me?” Oliver shrugs and if Felicity paid closer attention she could’ve sworn he rolled his eyes. “I could barely keep my head straight. I wanted what you had – stability and a . . . passion.”

She almost tells him she was never really passionate about being a consultant, but another second passes and she finally understands what he’s trying to say: she cared about the work she did and he . . . didn’t. And although Oliver probably cared about his clients, he went home everyday wishing for something more fulfilling.

“A reason to live.”

Felicity’s sad Oliver didn’t feel like there was a reason to live in Chicago, but seeing him here, alive and happy makes her slightly glad they fought. If they hadn’t, then Felicity doesn’t doubt she wouldn’t have come here, and Oliver would’ve been under Isabel’s firm grasp, working at a job he didn’t love.

“Well, you’re free now.”

He smiles contentedly. “Yeah, I am.”

They fall into another silence but a hint of panic hits her. She feels like the conversation is winding down but she still hasn’t told him everything. She hasn’t told him she loves him. That she’s in love with him. That without him in her life, she’s barely floating by and can’t function.

Her mouth pools with saliva and she can’t bring herself to look at him. This moment is too important to screw up, but she’s never been in this situation before. She’s never felt so uninhibited that it causes her to throw caution in the wind. She feels so out of control she’ll do whatever it takes to grab a hold of it.

Gathering any bit of courage she has, Felicity breathes in deeply and finally looks up at Oliver, albeit shyly and without any bit of finesse. “Oliver, I missed you.”

For a moment nothing exists between them – time has been erased, their past is forgotten history, and the gods from above collectively hold their breath. Felicity’s vision blurs from fear of rejection, but the possibility this might turn into something good stops her from running out the door. She has to know what this is between them, otherwise it’ll kill her.

Something changes in Oliver – his shoulders drop, his head tilts to the side, and he’s staring right at her like she’s the only person in the entire world. It’s as if he’s allowing himself to see her for the first time, not as a friend but as someone more. Someone who can make him happy, someone to encourage him to live another day.

“Me too, Felicity.”

Relief washes over her, coating her skin with tenderness and chills. After finding out Oliver was back at Star City, Felicity felt she was not longer in a position to be missed, because he clearly didn’t need her anymore. Yet hearing him admit to missing her causes her to feel more loved than she has in her entire life, and she wants nothing more than to wake up to the feeling every day.

Oliver suddenly scoots forward, and for a second Felicity thinks he’s going to grab her hand, but he doesn’t. He continues to look straight at her, as if he wants her to know how important his next words are.

She takes this opportunity to really look at him – his hair has gotten a tad longer, the wrinkles on the corners of have gotten deeper and his lips, which were always in a tight, pursed lines have loosened up. He’s always been handsome, but in this moment he’s nothing short of beautiful, especially in the dim café lighting.

God, Felicity wants him so bad, and the ache in her chest intensifies as each second passes.

“Those seven months we spent together were the first glimmer of light in a long time, Felicity.” She hadn’t realized he began speaking, and she has to lean forward to hear him talk.

He’s entirely focused on her but he seems a tiny bit distant, yet it does nothing to dissuade her from losing herself in him. He’s gotten her wrapped around his finger, and the thought of it doesn’t shame her – it makes her giddy with anticipation.

“And I want to say thank you for making me . . . happy.”

Oh no. Not this – anything but this. She came here tonight for the sole reason of apologizing and telling him how she feels, not have Oliver give up on any romantic – or platonic – possibility of getting together.

But something stirs in Felicity: hope. It gets her heart racing and her palms sweaty – she doesn’t doubt that Oliver can hear her heartbeat as it covers the air with it’s fast and thrumming pace. She entertains the idea maybe, just maybe, she’s not alone in her feelings. If he’s willing to write off a potential relationship, it means he was at least thinking about it before, and it’s all the evidence she needs.

And for the first time since Felicity’s met Oliver, she fucking fights to keep them together. To have them as a single unit, bound by admiration and love. Felicity’s not going to go home and tuck her tail between her legs – she’s already done that. No, this time Felicity’s going to make sure they’re in a place where there’s nowhere to run except into each other’s arms.

“Oliver, I –”

It happens without her own accord, but before she knows it she reaches over to grab his hand. Her fingers curl around his calloused palm, igniting a path of electricity she didn’t know was possible and gasping at the sensation. Oliver flinches from the contact, and Felicity would like to imagine Oliver felt the same spark of electricity as she did. But without a moment’s hesitation, he wraps his hands around hers, holding it tight and doing everything in his power to not let go. And it fills her up with such warmth she wants to cry, because there has never been a moment in her life where she’s felt this way.

He’s taught her what it means to love, to laugh, lose and gain it all back. Oliver’s everything to her.

“I want . . . the next day, month, and year to be happy.” Her voice wavers and her vision blurs for the umpteenth time, but she soldiers on. This is it.

“And I want you to be a part of it. With you.”

She shakily lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and she’s hyper aware of everything around her – Oliver’s fingers tightening it’s hold around hers, his scent, the long forgotten soufflé, and the fact all time has seized to exist. What Felicity feels is so powerful that it threatens to unbalance her, but she welcomes it with open arms.

“I love you, Oliver.”

She can feel the exact moment her soul leaves her body, anxiously waiting above her to merge with Oliver’s. All this time she’s been missing a piece, and it’s Oliver who’s been able to patch her up in ways she didn’t think were possible. He’s made her feel things she never thought she could, and no matter what happens Felicity will never regret hiring him more than a year ago. He’s meant to be in her life in its weird and awkward glory.

Oliver inhales sharply but his body doesn’t move an inch. His eyes rapidly move back and forth, searching and searching, until he’s found the answer he’s been waiting for.

“I love you, too. God, I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember.”

Letting out a relieved sob, Felicity clamps a hand over her mouth as she tries to suppress her emotions from tumbling forward. But she can’t help it – she’s been waiting for this moment for so long, and for it to actually happen . . . she can’t believe it.

And neither can Oliver – he laughs, the kind filled with delirium and happiness, the kind that shows up in true, honest moments. The sound is so beautiful and her laugh mingles with his, creating a symphony of love unknown to mankind.

She doesn’t how moves first, but their hands leave each other’s and Oliver immediately cups her face with both of his hands. He’s so close – she can see every single eyelash, pore, and truth hidden beneath his skin.

Placing her own hand on top of his and the other curling over his thigh, Felicity leans forward the same moment Oliver does, her eyes closing in contentment. Their lips touch like two missing pieces of a puzzle, and the sheer intensity of the kiss causes her to gasp – her womb tightens, her toes curl, and her skin erupts in chills as the sensation overtakes her. It’s the single most amazing kiss she’s ever experienced, and she’s already imagining what it’ll taste like years into the future.

Love does a number of things to you – it makes you irrational, angry and jealous, but there’s that other part, the part which makes you complete. The part that feels like coming home, the part that hurts so much you can’t bear to be without it.

And Felicity knows, without a doubt, all the hardships she and Oliver have gone through were meant to lead them to this point. There’s no other explanation for it – if it weren’t for Oliver working as an escort, Felicity would’ve never met him, would’ve never felt such intense pleasure, sadness and happiness.

She never would’ve known what being in love means, but she does now. As their foreheads touch one another’s, their souls mingling for the first time, Felicity has a feeling things are only going to get better. And she’ll do whatever it takes to hold onto it.

Holy shit, last chapter! Epilogue will be posted on Thursday. :)

#olicity #olicity fic #olicity fanfiction #olicitysquee #oliver queen #felicity smoak

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