#that said this tea tastes like ass I hate lemon tea | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

miekasa · 4 years ago

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iced tea

+ pairing: levi ackerman x reader

+ genres and warnings: college au, levi is the best not yet boyfriend au, erwin would definitely be an insufferable project partner to have but you gotta love him au

+ summary: there are three rules of night class. come on time, come prepared, and come with snacks. you forget about rule number three. luckily, levi’s there to save the day.

There’s only one appeal to signing up for a three-hour night class, and it’s that you only ever have to muster up the will to attend once a week. It’s a sacrifice, but it definitely cuts down on the temptation of skipping like you would a normal, one-hour section course. Just one and done.

Plus, you have Erwin with you in this class. Is he a little bit of a professor’s pet and consistently overly chipper every class despite knowing he’s about to endure 180 minutes of lecture? Sure, but at least you don’t have to suffer alone.

Really, it’s not as bad as it sounds, especially if the course is interesting enough, or easy enough, and luckily for you, yours is both. Not to mention, your professor is brilliant, actually entertaining, and does her best to keep the class engaging—she’s funny in the dorky, lovable professor kind of way. And she gives you short, ten to fifteen minute breaks at every hour mark just to make sure everyone doesn’t completely lose their minds.

It’s a commitment, but you’ve grown to actually enjoy it. As long as you follow the three rules of night class: come on time, come with your notes prepared so that you don’t get upstaged by Erwin, and come with—

“Fuck,” you curse, watching as Erwin pulls out one of his many, tiny, organic, boxed juices. The ones meant for children with soy sensitivities that Erwin claims are packed with more nutrients.

“What’s up?” He questions, more shocked than concerned, at your sudden profanity as he sets his juice box in the right corner of his desk.

You pout. “I forgot to bring snacks.”

Come on time, come with your notes prepared so that you don’t get upstaged by Erwin, and come with snacks. Those were the only three rules of night class, and you’d completely forgotten about the most important one.

“Oh,” Erwin grins, pulling a chocolate bar from his lunch bag and taunting you with it, “Sounds like a you problem.”

You snatch a piece from the top corner, stuffing part of it into your mouth to spite him; but you regret your choices as soon as it melts on your tongue.

“What the fuck—is this mint chocolate?” you complain, swallowing the rest of the sweet with disdain.

��Yes it is,” Erwin huffs, grabbing the remaining stolen bit from between your fingers and popping it into his mouth, “And it is delicious.”

“You’re an actual menace to society.”

Erwin crinkles his nose at you, “A menace to society with snacks for the next three hours.”

His comment makes you groan, albeit a little dramatically, and you slump back in your chair to debate your options. Class doesn’t start for another twelve minutes; you could try and run to the student center quickly to buy some last minute snacks, but the line was probably already lengthy with students of similar trains of thought, meaning you’d be late if you stuck it out, which would leave you violating rules one and three tonight. Erwin makes you sit in the front row with him, and you were not willing to take the late walk of shame with an armful of snacks in tow.

You could wait it out until the first hour break, but they’ll probably be sold out of anything good by then, not to mention the race to beat out the line again. If you played your cards right, you could order food during class and time it so that it was delivered during your break, but that was risky.

Alternatively, you could try and sprint to the concessions stand near the library, but going there and back was so much further away than the student center; you’d probably end up late, too.

“Hey,” you call to Erwin, refraining from rolling your eyes as he sets all six thousand and twenty eight of his colored pens on his desk for the evening, “Is Hange still on campus?”

“No, they have work today.”

You groan. Why did Hange have to be so responsible and good with their time-management skills. They was your last hope. Unless—

“Do you think Levi will bring me Starbucks?”

“Probably,” Erwin shrugs, humming to himself; but then he thinks it over, replying again with a knowing smirk on his face, “Actually, definitely. If he’s still here, but he probably is. You know him.”

You pout, the possibility of Levi being home is high, but so is that of him being cooped up in his favorite library. Either way, he would likely be studying right now, and you’d hate to disturb him, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

[sent 6:47pm] you — leeevaaaaaaaaai are you still on campus

[received 6:47pm] leeevaaai — yes — why, what’s wrong

[sent 6:47pm] you — uwu — wanna bring me something from starbucks before class — i have my 3 hour lecture today and i forgot snacks :—( — and erwin won’t share his organic $1500 whole foods gummy bears with me

[received 6:48pm] leeevaaai — i told you i don’t like the smileys with the noses, they’re ugly — should you even be drinking coffee this late, you’ll be up until the ass crack of dawn

You scoff audibly, and Erwin takes this as an invitation to peep at your screen. Your comment about his snacks does not go unnoticed, as bitterly munches on his (yes, in fact, organic and gluten-free, as if it being mint flavored wasn’t criminal enough) chocolate bar.

[sent 6:48pm] you — that’s RICH coming from you mister

[received 6:48pm] leeevaaai — you’re being awfully rude to someone you expect to buy you a $7 drink

[sent 6:48pm] you — hehe sorry i loooove you leeevaaai — venti iced chai latte — light ice

[received 6:49pm] leeevaaai — do you think i don’t know your overpriced starbucks order by now

[sent 6:49pm] you — uwu :—)

[received 6:49pm] leeevaaai — but you’re getting a grande, i’m not made of money — and it’s punishment for sending another ugly nose smiley

[sent 6:49pm] you — un-uwu

“I don’t blame him,” Erwin chuckles, scrunching the wrapper from his now finished bar between his fingers.

You flick him away, ignoring the turning heads of your classmates as Erwin’s pens fall in the aftermath. It’s seven o’clock on the dot when your laptop pings loudly with an incoming message from Levi—and a subsequent groan from Erwin, who breeches your personal space once more to press the mute button on your keyboard.

[received 7:00pm] leeevaaai — where are you sitting

[sent 7:00pm] you — front row to the right — erwin’s idea not mine

Levi spots Erwin’s bright blonde hair before he sees you, scoffing to himself as he makes his way to the front of the room; a tray with three Starbucks cups, and a plastic bag in tow. Erwin sees him first, too, waving at him as he crosses from the left side to where the two of you are seated.

“Aw, Levi, you brought me one!” Erwin all but squeaks, reaching for one of the other drinks with grabby hands after you take your iced drink from the tray.

But Levi pulls one hot drink from the tray for himself, and pulls the remaining one out of arm’s reach. “As if,” he grumbles, bringing his own cup to his lips.

“You’re the best, Levi,” you smile, sticking your tongue out at Erwin. Levi only offers you a small nod as acknowledgement. He extends his left hand now, the plastic bag sliding off his wrist and onto your desk, silently.

Confused, you lean forward, setting your drink down to open the contents of the bag. Inside, there are two granola bars, a bagel, cream cheese, some kind of sandwich, and a small Nutella to-go cup with mini breadsticks attached. When you look back up at Levi, he simply shrugs, sipping on his drink again while a light pink dusts over the tips of his ears.

“You said you forgot your snacks,” he explains, “I knew you’d text me the whole time, bitching about how Erwin wouldn’t share his zero-calorie lemon rinds if you didn’t have your own.”

You take note that the chai he brought you was, in fact, a venti, and not a grande like he’d threatened, and that the granola bars in the bag are not only your favorite flavor, but from your favorite brand, too; and you find yourself smiling as you decipher the very clear message underneath Levi’s less than poetic words.

“What’s in the other cup?” Erwin asks, pointing at the remaining drink. Levi carefully lifts it from the tray, and sets it down on the other corner of your desk, a safe distance away from your laptop.

“Tea,” he says shortly, “So you don’t lose your mind after inhaling your coffee.”

“This is tea, too. Chai is tea, Levi.”

“Tea without milk or six kilograms of sugar,” Levi corrects you, “Or ice.”

“Iced tea is tea, you know.”

Levi doesn’t respond to that with anything but a glare. You smile at his stoicism. Erwin thinks the whole exchange is kind of weird, and wonders where you possibly get the gall to make fun of his taste in snacks when you can’t even realize you’re in love with a man who refuses to identify iced tea as a valid form of tea.

“I better go before she starts,” Levi speaks, a single hand referencing to your professor behind him, who looks just about ready to begin class for the evening, “Call me when you’re done, I’ll drive you two home.”

“Oh, you don’t have to, Erwin and I usually take the b—”

“Brat,” Levi cuts your words short, “Call me when you’re finished. I’ll be in the library.”

You throw daggers at him with your eyes, but your resolve is waning, once again, as you closely read at the implications of Levi’s promise. You accept, and Erwin is more than happy for the free ride.

Levi hums. “And eat the bagel before the Nutella.”

“You’re annoying.”

“I’m a saint,” Levi deadpans, placing the palm of his hand on the top of your head affectionately, “Call me.”

He walks away before you can debate again, just as your professor speaks into the microphone to grab everyone’s attention. You scrunch your nose, hands flying to your hair to smooth out the aftermath of Levi’s playfulness, before opening your notes for the evening.

“You’re really dense aren’t you?” Erwin asks, one eyebrow raised, but the overall look on his face is more than fond, “It’s kind of cute.”

“Huh?” you question, cheeks stuffed with food as you bite into your bagel, “Dense about what?”

Erwin shakes his head, turning back to laptop with an exasperated expression, the fondness in his eyes fading quickly. “Hopeless,” he mumbles, “The both of you.”

#aot x reader #snk x reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #aot imagines #snk imagines #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman smut #levi fluff #levi smut #erwin x reader #eren x reader

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pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles · 5 years ago

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The Sweetest Taste

AU Ice Cream Shop Featuring Cake for the 5sos fic event sponsored by @maluminspace and @h0tsos

Word Count: 5,979 (I’m a long winded bitch, oops)

CW: this is smut so 18+, NSFW etc. M/M and M/F oral as well as sexual situations and strong language from the outset and throughout.

Special thanks to @adoring-lrh for helping me edit this monstrosity.

Event Masterlist

"I'm so bored," Calum complained, leaning back against the counter.

"Me too, but I have to train you how to close so you're not leaving early," you told him but you were just as bored as him.

Your parents had recently expanded the family business by opening up a second Cali-Cone Dream location in the touristy "historic district" downtown. Your dad's grandparents started the ice cream shop after moving to California from Missouri after World War 2. They'd invested their life savings in the shop and helped build the boardwalk. You’d grown up in this shop, and since it was early in the season and still slow, it was up to you to train the new hires. It was a pain in the ass, but at least your parents weren't breathing down your neck.

"If you keep complaining I'll make you clean the freezer. You'll have shrinkage for a week," you teased him.

"Like you wouldn't find a way to fix that," he shot back, wiggling his dark eyebrows at you.

Calum was the only new hire you liked. Jeremy was a kiss ass to your parents, Rico was boring, and Amanda was dumber than a bag of hammers. The smartest thing to come out of that girl's mouth was her boyfriend's dick. You'd already told your Mom it wasn't going to work out when you'd asked her to cut lemons for tea and she came back with oranges. Calum, however, was funny, a quick learner, and great with customers, not to mention drop-dead gorgeous.

"How is it only 3 o clock? Can we play cards or something? If I stand here much longer I'm gonna keep eating ice cream, and this is supposed to be my hot girl summer," he pouted before giving you a saucy wink. He was a total flirt and you weren't complaining. Three weeks ago he'd barely said a word, but you two had become fast friends and he'd really come out of his shell.

"I don't think you have to worry about that," you laughed.

The dark blue, slightly too tight, uniform t-shirt accentuated his bulging biceps, broad chest, and golden brown tan. The Cali-Cone slogan, "The Thrill of the Taste" scrawled across his back in bright red letters kept giving you dirty thoughts.

"We could close early, maybe show me another of your secret spots." Calum leaned towards you with a smirk and you rolled your eyes.

A week ago you'd gotten tired of him whining that there was nothing to do now that the college bars were dead since most students went home for the summer. You'd taken him out with you after you closed up shop. You'd avoided the popular rowdy country bar, and the dark thumping underground hip hop club, choosing instead to head for the beach. You took him to a spot under the boardwalk past the large boulders known as "The Breakers" where the local police patrols usually stopped.

You brought your beach bag and a popup tent you could both lounge in so bugs wouldn't eat you alive. He'd managed to sweet talk a bottle of wine out of his landlady, who knew he was only 20. It wasn't very strong, but it made you giggly and warm. Perhaps Calum lounging next to you on the blanket had something to do with that. After a few rosé flavored kisses his hands began to wander, and you had to put an end to it. Calum started to apologize, but you told him that the only reason you stopped was that your cycle hadn’t ended yet.

After that, Calum laid back on the blanket and began to talk.

He told you he was in his second year studying music composition and theory at the Strozzi Conservatory. He'd recently broken up with his high school sweetheart, and it had been painful. As a result Cal decided to not go home for the summer, deciding instead to take a workshop on-campus teaching local teens. He was a bit lonely but looking forward to the tourist season.

"This is the first time I've had time to myself where I don't have to worry about what anyone else thinks about me or what I do," he told you, taking a gulp before handing you the wine to finish off. You were sitting up and he was laying across your outstretched legs looking up at you.

"Ooh the wild college years," you laughed. You had seen many sheltered middle-class suburban kids get the first taste of freedom away from their helicopter parents and lose their minds. "If you're trying to get fucked up don't buy anything on the boardwalk. I've got a friend so at least you know it's clean."

"Nah not like that, but good to know." Calum took a deep breath, looked up at you, and then away. The shadows from the small camp lantern made him look mysterious and brooding. "Can I tell you something? I feel like I can trust you." His voice was soft and he rolled on his side concentrating on tracing lines along the skin on your legs.

"You can tell me anything," you assured him.

"I want to--uh I guess experiment with different sorts of types of experiences with something new. I mean, obviously new. What I mean is, not what you'd expect maybe. Shit!" Calum rubbed his eyes and you held back a smile. "What I'm trying to say is that," he paused again.

"Calum, are you into guys?" You ask, not wanting to rush, but you were running out of time. You only had about half an hour before the tide would start coming in and you had to leave.

"Is it obvious?" He asked, his eyes wide.

"Nope, I wouldn't have guessed at all, but I've had this conversation with a friend before. I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me, but we have to leave here in a bit." You checked your phone.

“So that’s it?” he asked.

“Dude, it’s not that serious. Tell me who you’re scoping out and I’ll let you know what’s up. That doesn’t mean we can’t have fun as well,” you told him.

He looked so relieved, and you could only imagine what it took for him to tell you that.

Calum sat up and you started rolling up the blanket. You packed up your beach bag and Calum held the lantern as you twisted and folded the tent in three quick fluid motions before sliding it into its bag.

"How did you do that so quickly in the dark?" Calum looked impressed.

"Practice, now come on, follow me, watch your step. It's slippery," you cautioned him.

It had gotten chilly and you were both shivering as you ran back to your car.

"You won't tell anyone at work will you? I know it's not a big deal but I don't want everyone in my business." Calum bit his lip and you could tell he was questioning his decision.

"Dude you're fine, but what made you decide to tell me?" The question slipped out before you realized it.

He looked embarrassed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I was hoping maybe you could help me out. I don't know how to read people and I don't want to make an idiot out of myself."

"Of course," you replied, reaching over to squeeze his hand. “Did you have anyone in mind?”

“Well there’s this lifeguard. He’s blonde and has a bird tattoo on his arm,” Calum told you.

You cringed, knowing exactly who he was talking about. “Sorry sweetie,” you replied, “ that’s Cody and he’s not only straight, he’s a complete jackass.”

Calum slumped and looked defeated. “Don’t worry sweetie,” you reassured him. “The summer is just getting started”

A clap of thunder pulled you from your daydream. If it was going to rain there was no chance business would pick up. You glanced over at Calum perched on the stool behind the cash register playing on his phone. His dark curls were falling across his forehead and your fingers itched to play with his hair. Being bored and horny was never fun and you were willing to bet Calum could take care of both. As if he could read your mind Cal looked up and caught your eye. The smirk that spread across his face let you know you were being too obvious, but you didn't care.

"If you keep looking at me like that I might forget I'm on the clock," Calum licked his lips and looked you over. "You're lucky there are cameras."

"Oh yeah? What did you have in mind? It just so happens I know all the spots the cameras can't see," you raise your eyebrows at him, challenging him to take it further.

The loud jingle of the bells hanging from the door startled both of you. You look up to see a familiar figure ducking through the door just before the sky opened up and began pouring rain.

"What's up Luke? Since when are you afraid to get wet," you teased the tall blonde walking towards the counter. You'd known Luke Hemmings for years, his dad was on the city council with yours and his mom taught sixth grade. He'd been a year ahead of you in school, and you'd both played varsity basketball in high school. He'd dated several of your friends, and before that, your older sister had a tumultuous relationship with his brother Ben several years back.

"Maybe I'm sick of the pool and want my old job back," Luke shot back. He'd worked three summers scooping ice cream next to you until he turned 18 and could work as a lifeguard on the beach.

"Sorry, dollface, I've managed to replace you, I even found someone better looking," you replied.

The Hemmings brothers were gorgeous and always had girls falling at their feet, but you'd never been that impressed. Not that it stopped y'all from hooking up on occasion, including once in the walk-in cooler after closing the summer before your senior year. It was a small town and you'd dated, hated, or hooked up with most of the guys your age. Luke's history was more extensive than yours. He'd not only hooked up with you and many of your female friends, but you'd kissed many of the same boys.

He looked from you to Calum who was standing to your right suddenly engrossed in the patterns on the tile floor. You could see the flush on his cheeks and his leg was jiggling nervously. Luke looked Calum up and down, his blue eyes lingering on the younger man before shooting you an approving grin.

"I see you found a college boy. Can't say I blame you, much better looking than that ginger from last year," Luke snickered.

"I'm gonna go check the cooler," Calum told you, barely audibly before ducking in the back.

You looked at Luke who was as confused as you were before excusing yourself to follow Calum.

You barely made it around the corner before Calum popped out at you nearly scaring you to death.

"What the hell," you squealed as he pulled you into the freezer.

"That's the guy I was telling you about," he hissed as the door shut behind you.

"What are you talking about?"

"Remember when you drove me home the other night? You asked if I had anyone in mind so you could find out which team they played for," his voice was a panicked whisper, and his dark eyes were wide as saucers.

Then it clicked. "You were talking about Luke?" I asked, my voice louder than I meant for it to be.

"Why are you yelling? Yes, obviously that's him, except you told me his name was Dylan."

"You said tall, curly hair, with a bird tattooed on his arm. Luke doesn't have any tattoos, his mom

hates them," I replied, but doubted myself now. I hadn't seen Luke in ages, he'd always been a spoiled Mama's boy and maybe Liz finally caved.

"That tall drink of water has a hummingbird tattooed on his arm, but that's not important right now. Have y'all hooked up?" You nodded and Calum scowled. "Figures he would be straight," he sighed.

Your brain finally caught up to the situation at hand, and you had an idea.

"Listen to me Calum, you're gonna wait on him. Offer him a strawberry waffle cone, it's his favorite," you pushed him out of the cooler and back towards the front.

You popped your head around the corner and whistled making Luke look up from his phone. "I'll be out in a second. I keep telling Dad this freezer needs replaced, have one on the house, but try not to scare off my new employee please," you shoot him a stern look as Calum came around the corner behind you.

"I'll try not to bite, but I make no promises," Luke laughed before turning his attention to Calum.

You moved just out of their sight, but still within earshot to see if your little plan worked.

"So uh, yeah, the boss said you could have a free waffle cone. She said you like strawberry ice cream," Calum started out a squeak but he cleared his throat and continued, in a deep rough tone that gave you the shivers.

"Did she now?" Luke's voice dripped honey and you could hear him smiling. "I'm surprised she remembered, but she's good like that."

"That's why she's the boss," Calum was cautious, and you stifled a laugh. "Have y'all known each other long? Are you close?"

"Oh we know each other very well, and we've been close, very close sometimes. She's easy to talk to, I'm sure you know how it is," Luke answered and you had to put your hand over your mouth to hold back a laugh. You'd recognize that syrupy flirtatious tone anywhere, it was obvious Luke was seducing your new employee. You peeked around the counter to see Calum handing Luke his ice cream cone. A double scoop, perfectly dipped, pink and creamy, just barely starting to drip around the edge you watched Luke begin to lap it up while keeping his eyes on Calum.

The power flickered as Luke leaned back against one of the tables in the dining area, half sitting half standing, his long legs crossed at the ankle. He was wearing the black swim trunks trimmed in bright red every lifeguard wore on duty and a thin white reflective windbreaker unzipped almost all the way to his waist revealing his broad bare chest. You could see Calum fidgeting nervously with the ice cream scoop while trying not to stare. Luke was not making that easy, his lips and tongue working obscenely in a way that was starting to make you horny, and you knew what he was doing and why. Poor Calum didn't stand a chance. It didn't help that he'd worn basketball shorts to work and the clingy fabric made his arousal obvious even where you were standing.

You stepped back trying to figure out your next step. Your intention had been to introduce Luke and Calum but watching them together made your thoughts wander places they shouldn't. The rain was really coming down, sheeting the windows and sounding like pebbles being hurled against the roof. Daylight had turned dark as the storm really kicked up. You could hear the guys talking as you checked the weather on your phone. You were stuck here at least another 30 minutes as a big blob of red on the radar moved through your area.

"She said I dare you to kiss the person on either side of you, and I didn't know if I wanted to kill her or kiss her." You heard Luke's voice and realized you'd zoned out and you headed back towards the front.

You stepped through the swinging doors just in time to hear Calum ask, "why was that?"

"Because the girl to his left was my friend who was absolutely gagging for Luke's cock," you answered as Calum jumped and Luke laughed.

"What was her name? Crystal? Kristen?" Luke bit the tip of the waffle cone off and sucked the remainder of the ice cream out of the bottom, glancing at you before his eyes returned to Calum.

"Kirsten, you did end up sleeping with her, " you reminded him. "Tell him who was on the other side."

Luke licked his lips and grinned. "Keeeerstin, that's right, and that 4th of July we all did crazy things if I remember correctly. To my right however was the hottest soccer player in school who I'd had a crush on for ages."

Calum nodded and Luke's gaze flickered your way once again, his blue eyes bright and mischievous, before he continued, "I was freaking out when we kissed but then he ended up taking me back to his house and we fooled around on his sister's swing set."

You laughed along with Luke as you watched Calum realize what Luke said. His head snapped up, blinking rapidly and his mouth opened and closed refusing to find words before you saw him look at you, then Luke, and then back to you as everything clicked into place.

"Is that what strawberry ice cream meant? Were you setting me up?" Calum asked.

"Not a setup, but wanted to see if Luke remembered the code. Turns out there's not as dumb as he looks," you walked up to Calum stopping just inches from his chest looking up at him. "And you did say you were bored."

"What did you have in mind?" He raised his eyebrows at you, still unable to look at Luke.

“I mean, Luke likes strawberry ice cream, and so do you. I doubt we’re going to have many customers with this rain,” you told him.

“They closed down the beach because of lightning so no one is coming out,” Luke chimed in.

“That’s what I was thinking, so it sounds to me like the three of us have some time on our hands,” you replied. You looked at Calum and he nodded but his eyes burned into you.

“Are you sure you’re up for that?” he asked apparently reading your thoughts.

“I can handle anything,” you puffed your chest out and heard Luke snicker, but you didn’t dare take your eyes off Calum.

“I’m down if y’all are,” he challenged, finally looking at Luke.

Am I really going to do this? Your thoughts were racing and your heart was pounding as hard as the rain. CAMERAS you thought before remembering you'd been the one who updated the security system and there was a workaround.

Thunder crashed so loudly you felt it shake your bones. No one would come around today, and it made no sense to stay open or send Luke home in this storm.

"Calum, go make sure the back door is locked, Luke if you could flip the bolt and get the blinds," you told them before you ran back into the office where money was counted. Behind the desk was the breaker box and you flipped the switch that shut off the security cameras and half the lights.

You poked your head out at Luke and motioned for him to follow you towards the back. You bumped into Calum as he came back towards the front.

"Where are you going?" He asked

"Break room, even with this storm I'm worried about someone peeking in," you reply.

"Really?" Calum was skeptical.

"Around here you never know," Luke told him.

You flipped the light switch, but only two bulbs lit up casting the room in soft blue light with long shadows.

"So I hear you got a tattoo, Hemmings," you said, trying to break the ice. Calum looked even more nervous than you felt, and you silently asked Luke to take charge.

He winked at you unzipping his jacket and shrugging it off his shoulders. You noticed he was still lean and lanky but he'd definitely filled out, added some muscle definition. Sure enough, there on his right bicep was a small hummingbird.

"I can't believe Liz finally caved," you teased.

"Honestly I just went and did it, and then dealt with the consequences. She's still mad, but nothing I can't handle," he replied. Luke looked over towards Calum. "You have way more than I ever will, can I see them?"

Calum nodded and came up beside you. He started off nervous, but as he explained his tattoos starting with his parents’ initials on his hands, working up past his wrists, to the lovely bird with his sister's name, he explained when and where he'd gotten them. Some, like the thistle on his left bicep, had special meaning relating to friends and family. While others, like the spade and the horseshoe, were aesthetic choices.

"Is that it?" Luke raised his eyebrows and bit his lip.

"Nope," Calum smirked, warming to the other's man's attention. He reached behind his neck and in one swift motion pulled his shirt off over his head. You felt your pulse quicken and heard Luke suck in his breath next to you. Calum was brawnier, broad-chested with black ink on brown skin. Without realizing it you reached out to touch him, trailing a fingertip along what looked like a feather etched underneath his collarbone.

"What's this?" You asked, feeling your insides quiver when he turned his brown eyes towards you.

"It's a silver fern, my mom's Maori from New Zealand," Calum's voice was a sultry whisper.

"And this?" Your fingers slide down to the "Choose Life" on his chest.

"It's from Trainspotting and- OH," Calum moaned as you absentmindedly tugged his nipple.

"Do that again," Luke told you, his hand sliding down over his dick now a bulge in his black and red lifeguard trunks.

You tugged, harder this time, and were rewarded with a sound somewhere between a moan and a hiss. Calum licked his lips before his mouth hung slightly open as your fingers traveled to the other one, repeating the motion. Both men moaned in response and Calum noticed Luke palming himself through his shorts.

"Enjoying the show?" He asked with a slight smirk.

"Oh my God yes," Luke responded, squeezing his cock slightly. "All I can think about is the two of you sucking me off."

"I'm down for that," you reply. "What do you say Cal."

Uncertainty crept into his expression and he paused, "I want to but I've never done that before."

"If you want I can show you," you offered, the idea had you excited like never before.

"Is that ok?" Calum asked.

Luke's blue eyes went wide. "Fuck yes, please," he whispered.

You untied the drawstring on Luke's shorts and tugged them down past his hips letting his long cock spring free. Rock hard and leaking as you wrapped your hand around the shaft, you could feel his body react to your touch. You stood on your tiptoes and playfully kissed his lips before you sank to your knees in front of him.

You looked up at Calum who was watching your intently, lips pursed in concentration.

"You know what you like so start there. Personally I like to tease a bit to start off," you tell him, flicking your tongue around the tip. "You wanna keep it wet and keep it moving. I think spitting is gross but if you gag a little it gets everything nice and sloppy." You took Luke's cock in your mouth getting it slick and shiny as you bobbed your head, taking him further down your throat each time until your nose was almost touching his belly.

"Oh shit," you heard Luke's growl above you as you came back up for air. You continued pumping him with your hand as you looked up at Calum.

"Come on, you try," you beckoned to him.

Calum was eager now, as he kneeled next to you, looked up at Luke, and wrapped his hand around your much smaller one as you stroked Luke's cock together.

"Oh God," Luke moaned, the sight almost sending him over the edge.

Calum leaned forward and brushed his lips against the taut skin before his tongue darted out to get his first taste. Luke's knees started to buckle and he leaned back against the break table which was inches behind his thighs. Calum hesitated, eyeing the table before glancing at you, but both you and Luke knew the table could easily hold his weight.

"It's fine, keep going," you pulled back and gave his arm a nudge.

"Are you sure? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I have no idea what I’m doing. I almost never do,” he replied.

"You're sucking a dick not disarming a bomb, just don't bite and you'll be fine," you told him with a giggle.

Calum swirled his tongue around the tip and you saw Luke grip the table's edge, his knuckles white. Calum began sucking, softly, and slowly before gaining confidence he built up a rhythm. Luke grunted, his eyes screwed shut and his chest heaved.

"Stop," he pleaded, "you're gonna make me cum too fast."

Calum pulled back with a pop. "I thought that was the point," he smirked up at the older man.

"God what I wouldn't give to let you both take turns riding me," Luke moaned, grasping his cock tightly, fighting for control.

"What's wrong Luke?" You reached up and ran your thumb along Calum's plump bottom lip. "His pretty mouth got you all excited. Thinking about how you're the first guy he's ever sucked off? About how lucky you are?

"You keep talking like that and you're gonna make me cum in my pants," Calum warned you.

"Not yet, I wanna help with that," Luke growled.

"We gotta finish you first," Calum grinned and got back to work. Luke cursed loudly as his cock disappeared down the other man's throat. Calum stopped and almost pulled back but kept going.

You looked up at Luke, he was staring down at the two of you with half-open eyes. You reached up and cupped his balls, giving them a gentle tug. That sent him over the edge.

"Oh shit I'm gonna come," Luke yelled, bucking his hips. Calum tried to swallow but he started coughing so he leaned back, cum dripping from his chin and splattering on his chest. You watched Luke fight to keep his eyes on Calum before they rolled back in his head as his knees shook and his breath escaped him in ragged gasps.

He sank to the floor next to the two of you watching as you pulled Calum in for a kiss tasting Luke on his lips. When you broke away, Luke was there kissing you first and then Calum.

"That was so good, let us take care of you now. I bet you're ready to burst. Let's see what we're working with here," he said as he reached into Calum's shorts. You both smiled as Luke pulled out a cock that was a bit shorter but thicker than Luke's.

"Damn Cal, you've been holding out on me," you purred in his ear as you moved behind him.

"I would've fucked you that night on the beach if you'd let me," he admitted.

"I was indisposed, but we'll have to make up for that," you tell him before you kissed your way up his neck.

"Raise up a bit," Luke told him as he pulled his shorts up before laying on the carpet. He positioned his head just under Calum's balls blowing on them as you reached around and massaged Calum's cock. "This is gonna be all I think about tomorrow at work. I'm gonna be rock hard sitting up in that chair just thinking about what I wanna do to the two of you."

A huge thunderclap seems to shake the building and the lights flickered as your lips found Calum's neck as you nipped at his skin. You'd been fantasizing about marking up his throat and couldn't resist leaving a mark. He whined in response and pushed back into you before moaning as Luke's mouth went to work getting Calum's cock nice and wet before sucking and humming on his balls. You continued to suck tiny bruises on Calum's flesh as Luke's mouth stayed busy alternating between working over Calum and talking dirty.

"I'd love to watch you fuck her before I come up behind you and take that ass. Imagine being between us, having your cock buried in her pussy while you're stretched and full," Luke told him and the idea gave you the most delicious thrill. The idea of Luke fucking Calum into you had you aching for your own release, but right now you wanted to make Calum feel good. You twisted your hand slightly as you stroked his cock. Calum's head rolled back resting on your shoulder, moaning over and over as you kept one hand on his dick and the other tugged his nipples. You couldn't see what Luke was doing but you heard sucking noises between Calum's moans.

"I'm getting close," Calum warned you. "Oh God keep doing that," he gasped and you could hear Luke humming as he sucked.

You jerked him faster, concentrating on the tip, tugging his nipples harder as your teeth grazed along his shoulder.

He erupted onto Luke's chest with an "Oh God" that was both a prayer and an exultation. Luke quickly moved so he was sucking the tip and the two of you worked together to drain every drop.

Calum slumped back against you and you peppered his skin with kisses as you felt him shudder as he came down from his high.

"That was incredible, I don't think I can feel my legs," Calum said as he shifted so he was no longer kneeling.

"I bet," Luke laughed as he got up. He walked over to the sink in the corner by the refrigerator and grabbed some paper towels. He got himself cleaned up before bringing some back for you and Calum.

"Are you ok?" Luke asked when he noticed you were breathing heavily. "Do you need your inhaler?"

You reached out your hand so he could help you up. "I'm fine, that was just intense and I got excited," you winked at him as you stood up. He pulled on your arm and caused you to stumble and fall into his chest. He wrapped you in a cuddle and bent his lips closer to your ear.

"I haven't forgotten about you princess," Luke's words made you shiver with the anticipation. You could tell your panties were soaked and your core throbbed as Luke gripped your hips and lifted you on to the break table. He stepped between your legs and put this hand under your chin and pulled you in for a kiss. Calum was still on his tongue as it tangled with yours and you tasted his essence which was sweeter than Luke's. His hands tugged at your shirt and you broke away to let him lift it over your head. He kissed you again as you fumbled with your bra, unhooking it before you tossed it across the room. Luke's mouth moved to your breasts and you saw Calum still seated on the floor as he watched you with Luke, his eyes glazed over with lust.

When your eyes met Calum jolted out of his gaze and scrambled to his feet. You almost laughed as he tripped over his own feet as he readjusted his shorts, but at that moment Luke's mouth closed over your stiff nipple and the laugh became a moan.

Luke's fingers were clawing at your waistband and you lifted your hips as he pulled your shorts and panties down at the same time.

The rain was beating against the roof in sheets now, but you could barely hear it over the sound of your own heartbeat.

Luke spread your legs and stepped back to show Calum. "She how pretty and wet she is for us. We gotta give her something special as a thank you. Want me to show you how to make her squirm," Luke teased, running a finger in between your soaked folds, and you pushed your hips up with a frustrated grunt.

"Nah," Calum looked you dead in the eye with the cockiest smirk you'd ever seen in your life.

"Trust me, I know what I'm doing. I've been fantasizing about this for weeks," he was talking to Luke but his eyes were on you. "Tell me princess, do you taste as good as you look. I bet you're as sweet and juicy as a pink Starburst."

You don't even recognize the sound that escaped your lips when Calum's mouth moved between your thighs. His tongue danced and moved in ways you'd never experienced, curling inside you before swooping up between your lips and lapping up your nectar. His pillowy lips sucked on your clit alternating with soft cool puffs of air over your fevered skin.

Luke buried you in a flurry of kisses and you didn't know where each one was going to land, your mouth, breasts, neck, belly, shoulders, along your hairline or on your fingertips.

Calum was relentless, barely coming up for air as he buried his face in your pleasure. You felt like a live wire as your nerves danced under your skin while Calum's tongue found every pleasure spot. Your heels beat the table in time with the storm raging outside as your orgasm started to build. You wanted to praise him or cry out but Luke covered your mouth with his.

You arched your back almost slamming your head back on the table as Calum furiously worked on achieving your high. He wasn't going to let up until you were screaming for him, and you gladly obliged. Your climax hit you hard enough to see stars and your whole body let go.

"Damn baby," Luke's voice was in your ear but sounded very far away.

You tried to close your legs but Calum wouldn't let you. He held them open still sucking your clit his fingers buried inside you as he coaxed another orgasm out of you. He moaned into your skin as you drenched his face, your thighs, and the table as you came undone. He didn't stop until you were whimpering from being overstimulated, and only then did he finally pro back.

He stood up and grabbed Luke for a kiss leaving the tall blonde as breathless as you were. The storm was still raging but your heartbeat was returning to normal. You sat up, a bit embarrassed by the mess.

"Sorry about that, can one of y'all get some towels?" You ask even though you hated to interrupt them.

"Don't apologize," Luke stroked your thigh, and Calum did as you asked. "That was the hottest thing I've ever seen." He looked over at Calum, "will you teach me how to make her squirt like that."

"Hell yeah," Calum answered as he gently cleaned you up. He landed a tiny kiss on your nose. "Thank you," he whispered, almost too softly to be heard. You reached down and squeezed his hand as you shared a smile.

"How about I help y'all close up and we head back to my apartment?" Luke asked.

"Great idea, we'll order pizza and see where the night goes." You slid off the table, wobbled a bit but Calum wouldn't let you fall.

"Sounds like a plan, boss," Calum grinned. "Can we get ice cream too?"

"Sure, what flavor?" You asked as you pulled your shorts up and Luke tossed your bra to you.

"Strawberry," they answered in unison before you all cracked up.

"Oh this is gonna be a great summer," you called over your shoulder as you walked out of the room.

@kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @ghostofmashton @sexgodashton @sublimehood @ihatetigers @calteahood @5-secondsofcolor @tea4sykes @wildmichaelflower @noshamenion @punkrockpreferences @rosecolouredash @cal-pal-cuddles @damselindistressanu

#5sos writing collab #calum hood #luke hemmings #cake #Cake Smut #calum hood fanfic #calum hood blurbs #calum hood smut #luke hemmings smut #luke hemming imagines #luke hemmings fanfic #luke hemmings blurb #5sos #calum 5sos #5seconds of summer #luke 5sos #luke 5sos smut #calum 5sos smut

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kelleesioverhere · 4 years ago

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50 Questions

Tagged by the beautiful @chasingforeverandaday, thank you so much!

what is the color of your hairbrush? okay wow we are off to an embarrassing start I am so unbelievably unobservant I had to actually go into my bathroom and look.... it’s purple and grey. Who knew!

name a food you never eat? CILANTRO get that shit away from me. It taints anything in it’s nearby vicinity

are you typically too warm or too cold? if I’m awake I’m too cold. If I’m asleep I’m too hot

what were you doing 45 minutes ago? working like the great lil employee that I am

what's your favorite candy bar? Frozen Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup? If that doesn’t count then Wunderbar

have you ever been to a professional sports game? yes, I have been to two Canucks games and two Vancouver Canadians (baseball) games. I’ve never seen the team I’m cheering for win, I have determined I am a bad luck charm

what is the last thing you said out loud? Um. “IQLAS78A128″. loool I am home alone.

what is your favourite ice cream? Mint Chip Hagen Dazs

what was the last thing you had to drink? a cup of tea

do you like your wallet? yes I do, it was a gift and it’s v classy

what is the last thing you ate? half a piece of cheesecake last night lol

did you buy any new clothes last weekend? I cannot for the life of me tell you the last time I bought new clothes so absolutely not

what's the last sporting event you watched? The last sporting event that was on at our house? Thursday night football. did I pay attention, absolutely not. Can’t even tell you who was playing. Last one I watched and paid attention to... Canucks vs Vegas game 7

what is your favorite flavor of popcorn? Smartfood cheddar popcorn hands down 10/10

who is the last person you sent a text message to? my fiancees cousin, we are trying to put together something great for my mans 30th bday and we are both terrible at shit like this

ever go camping? I love camping I will go anytime any place it is my fuckin fave

do you take vitamins? lol no

do you regularly attend a place of worship? my dad told me “nothing starts more wars than religion” so given that upbringing, no, I do not

do you have a tan? yes I do, an extremely uneven one because I lay on my back all summer and really resisted rolling over

do you prefer chinese or pizza? oh god don’t do this to me............ I think I’d have to say chinese, just because I like a wider variety of chinese options

do you drink your soda through a straw? well I used to before we all found out about the turtles (now I don’t but I won’t lie, it tastes better through a straw, it just hit different)

what color socks do you usually wear? white. I only own white socks. This is one of my great #lifehacks because my socks always match, and pairing them up is easy breezy lemon squeezy, I really think I’m onto something here

do you ever drive above the speed limit? the key is to always go 1-3km below the ‘excessive speed’ impound limit

what terrifies you? so many things, I am such a wimp. Heights, dark water, spiders, feeling trapped, public speaking, I could go on

look to your left, what do you see? my door to my hallway. Not the most exciting not gonna lie

what chore do you hate most? VACUUMING. I refuse to live in a house with carpet because you know what my ass is NEVER going to vacuum, I already know this to be true so why fight it

what do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? Jim Jeffries saying ‘cunt’, is that bad?

what's your favorite soda pop? coca cola with ice in a glass through a straw goddammnnnnnnn

do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? oh my god drive through

what's your favorite number? All numbers are equal to me, I don’t care. How about 5 today

who’s the last person you talked to? My fiancee when he left for work this AM

favorite cut of beef? okay yikes confession idk anything about beef cuts, I try to not buy beef at the store because there are so many options I get overwhelmed and confused. You could give me any cut and say it’s the prime best one and I’d believe you (but I like when my parents make roast beef for me. Is that a cut? Does that count? Do you see the problem???)

last song you listened to? "Classic Cars” - Bright Eyes

last book you read? To completion? “All the light we cannot see” which I really enjoyed

favorite day of the week? Friday! TODAY!

can you say the alphabet backwards? omg yes not to brag but I’m really good at this, I practice all the time because I have a random fear I’ll get pulled over by police and accused of drunk driving when I’m not, and in order to prove to them I am sober I plan to recite the alphabet backwards, I’ve been training for this moment for years

how do you like your coffee? Hmmm I really prefer tea but if I’m going to have coffee I want it in something that’s basically a desert like a PSL or a peppermint mocha

favorite pair of shoes? white adidas w the black stripes you know the ones

time you normally get up? 7 or 8 am

what do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets!!

how many blankets on your bed? one (even that’s too much, I am always so hot when I’m sleeping)

describe your kitchen plates? they are white with a marble design they are pretty cute

describe your kitchen at the moment? it is clean since I work from home now and have time to tidy! It’s very white. It’s very tidy. I am calm. All is well

do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? moscow mule pls

do you play cards? only if forced because I am the sorest loser ever but I’m also bad at cards, so, you see the dilemma

what color is your car? black

can you change a tire? hahahahahahahahahahahaha absolutely not

your favorite state? Okay I feel like this is an #unpopularopinion but... FLORIDA there I said it

favorite job you've had? my current job because it involves cheerleading ;)

tagging: @yanak324 @lightninginabottle0613 @livhatesolives @jjofalltrades @speechphi @anniephl

#tag game #50 questions

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steve0discusses · 5 years ago

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Yugioh S4 Ep 15: Yami Joins the Bay Area Tribe By Throwing a Riot About Sports on Caltrain

So as you’ve probably guessed because of my lack of posts--I got kinda busy with life stuff and just got hit with this really nasty flu at the same time. Yes, I am in a Coronavirus-affected area but no, I don’t have it and I am not dying (although I did do the right thing and quarantined myself anyway, much like a whole lot of the Bay who are just...working from home. Traffic’s been great.) It’s just that every January/February I tend to fall apart and get the flu so bad I lose my voice for 5 days. This year was 6 days. I just catch the flu a lot, but at least I get my shots so it’s not as bad as it would have been.

So, I took a hell ton of Nyquil and Dayquil and while I’m...functional...I don’t know if any of this make sense. So forgive my rambling. I usually ramble, today I’ll be like...hella rambling. About TRAINS.

So anyway, Lets talk about Yugioh.

Lets board a Californian train!

Yugioh has decided that out of every vehicle they’ve devoted episodes to--they haven’t done trains yet, so it’s train time. Train time...in America...which is not a great place for trains. Like I never really think about it but...people take the freakin Greyhound over trains. Which is wild, guys, the Greyhound is...it’s a state of mind. We ignore trains so much.

It’s just really funny that they left Japan to go to America to ride a train when it’s like...the show takes place...in Japan. The land of wonderful trains. But wtv, they wanted ye Old Western experience.

Anyway, Rebecca really wanted to go on the train with them, but everyone pretty much decided that children were no longer safe on this trip with Yugi and co. The fact that Yugi and co are also children is something I guess we decided to push under the rug. I mean Duke Devlin has a freakin job and a work Visa at 17 so...that’s adult enough, right?

(*in a very Roaring Camp Railroad Commercial voice, and over the dulcet sounds of a banjo* More TRAINS under the cut!)

And then Arthur decided to just really grill it into Yami for some reason.

I think it was mostly to act as a recap but damn, Arthur Hawkins just really seems to hate Yami for killing Yugi. Anyway, lets get a good look at our train.

Surprisingly for this show, they decided not to put us on the Roaring Camp Railroad through the Santa Cruz Mountains, instead, they put us on an actual legit commuter train, and it blew my mind because...it’s the CALTRAIN.

That’s my train! What’s my Caltrain doing in Yugioh!?!?

They even got the paint job right! This is absolutely the Caltrain!

We never update this train. So yes, it still looks like this over 10 years later. It’s very underfunded.

+++THIS IS TRAIN FACTS FEEL FREE TO SKIP TRAIN FACTS+++++

So the Caltrain was originally privately owned tracks--which is how they are really nicely laid out--a private company bought everything/pushed out the old owners before the place got developed. When trains went under, the tracks were purchased by the State and then given to Amtrack to manage. So, Caltrain is strictly property of the State Government but still run by the Federal Government at the same time. Don’t ask me how it works, I don’t know, I just pay my taxes and it goes vroom.

We’ve wanted to extend the Caltrain down to Southern California for a very long time, but because of corruption and a lot of people in politics refusing to expand the Bay out of the fear of maybe dropping our housing prices to reasonable limits, and the fear of making it way too feasible to get more children to Disneyland, the track has stayed roughly the same length for over 40 years.

Overall, It’s less drive time than this duel that takes up this next arc, I’m pretty sure. I’m gonna guess that the duel will be 3 episodes long because c’mon. This is Yugioh. It’s always 3 episodes long, like a Nintendo boss.

Anyway, all these train facts are things that are probably so weird and foreign to places that have ample trains--but in America, we just don’t have a strong train lobby compared to our auto lobby. So, I’m sure that people in Japan making this series thought “Oh they’re on a train--it can just go forever because why wouldn’t it be long? Aren’t all American trains connected?” but uh...it’s a short train. Like we’re talking like a few hours max, and that’s only if they’re starting from Gilroy.

I will say that BART is longer and has multiple tracks, so you would think they’d just take BART instead. But, it goes under the ocean for part of it, and we’ll get to why that would have been a very big problem in this episode later. Also, BART is very gross and no one wants to animate that outside of a horror movie.

But at least they didn’t go way out of left field and take the SF trolley. The Caltrain does actually go pretty fast. It...kind of makes sense. They did actual research into a real thing that we do have.

++++END RANT ABOUT THIS TRAIN AND HOW NONE OF THIS EPISODE MAKES SENSE BUT IT’S YUGIOH SO I WILL IGNORE THAT++++

And youknow...there’s something just so adorable about seeing desert mesas reflected in the window of the Caltrain. It’s just delightful. Because, in reality the entire stretch of the Caltrain is very densely suburban/urban, and the only place where it isn’t surrounded by city is when it’s flanked by the sea.

But yeah, just put mesas on it!

*freakin curtains*

Joey and Tristan hit the “dining car,” which I don’t think is a thing in any form of commuter train. These trains are for trips the length of about 1 extensive Puzzles and Dragons session on your phone, give or take.

(And man, speaking of, the Yugioh PAD collab was so good, guys. Ah man. Been wrecking like every dungeon in multiplayer ever since Bro and I both got a Yugi to put as our leader. He’s basically one of the best leaders in the game right now and I feel like people at PAD were huge Yugioh fans because they were like “what if we made...basically every Yugioh pull into a freakin beast that broke every dungeon in the game?”)

I can’t believe Joey Wheeler went thousands of miles from his homeland and was like “I better drink an American soda” and chose Orange. I mean he might be drinking an Arizona Tea, but I’m pretty sure he thought “ah, Kenan and Kel, right?” and just nabbed the nastiest soda that exists outside of grape.

I feel like I can still taste the orange soda I drank over 20 years ago. It is terrible. It is SO orange. Gross. But at the same time...good? I really don't know with Orange Soda. It’s probably gross.

Meanwhile, Tea decides it’s an appropriate time for Yami to work on his social skills. Now. When he’s visibly grieving after being berated by his Basically-Step-Grandfather and Rebecca.

And then we find out something I’ve never realized before, and it’s that Tea is really bad at social cues. Like maybe even worse than Yami. Like, I dunno how Pharaoh could look more like an angry cat/hedgehog but Tea was not picking up on it.

And y’all I’m not making that up, these are the topics Tea actually came up with for the guy who just saw his best friend die/was very implicit in said murder. Beaches and Bathing Suits.

She got over Yugi being dead like immediately.

Of course, this episode is kind of weird because, much like this show has done so many times already, these guys are still struggling to truly understand that Yugi is two people in one body. Tea sort of comes to this realization as if she...forgot that she has stepped inside his actual head and seen this for herself.

Or maybe it’s denial, but I’m thinking maybe the show did this for the new people coming to the show, to explain a rather complicated thing that took 3 seasons to cement in our minds. But still, it makes Tea seem very forgetful over a guy she should sort of be dating I guess.

Anyway it’s their first real fight. Kind of. I mean it’s hard to tell if anyone on this show is dating, and it’s equally hard to tell if they are fighting, too.

Well, first real fight if you don’t count Zero when Yugi tried to make out with Miho over a card duel, but I think we’re all doing our best to forget that ever happened. Yugi especially.

Or I guess that time she strangled him nearly to death in the nurse’s office when Shadi took over his body. That counts as a fight, right?

Ah. Now we’re on Caltrain.

Don’t take it the wrong way, Caltrain is actually our higher end safe train, compared to our other transit, BART, which will always sit you next to a weirdo, guaranteed. Caltrain--you can take a good nap on Caltrain. BART...you will never feel comfortable enough to take a nap on BART (also because there’s not enough seating room anymore)

But a lot of people who take the train are just freakin WEIRD. I used to take the Caltrain with my older brother (different bro than the bro of this blog, this is my chaotic neutral bro) because we both worked near the same place in downtown SF, and he would always take with him--I kid you not--a 2 liter bottle of Mountain Lightning for a snack.

For those not in the States, Mountain Lightning is the offbrand Walmart version of Mountain Dew. Yes. I know what I said. It seems dumbfounding as Mountain Dew is already an off brand of Sprite--the true lemon/lemon lime--but indeed, like Inception, you can always go deeper, and if there is a soda so bewildering and random, my older brother will be ON IT.

Anyways, my older bro is a train weirdo, so not only does he prefer Mountain Lightning to Mountain Dew, he would take out a 2 liter from his backpack, tilt back his head, and just chug the whole thing straight from the huge ass bottle in front of God and everyone on that train.

He’d polish it off completely on the ride there and the ride back, because my older brother has this weird medical problem where he can’t really feel pain and he has an insane metabolism and never gained weight until he was like 32, so he can just...chug as much soda as he freakin wants. So, at some point of the trip he would have to use the very tiny bathroom, and it would be very urgent, and he’d just scramble over me to get to the aisle and then kind of skip and hop all the way there on the rush hour train that was completely full of people.

Like, most people don’t even know that Caltrain has a bathroom--well now you know, and for several years there, it was just always taken by my brother violently pissing. That was us (well...him). My apologies.

In case your curious, now my bro has hardcore acid reflux, and all he needs to do is stop drinking so much damn soda, but it’s been very hard for him, so he has cut back to “diet soda”. This is still a lot of soda and it still causes acid reflux. His doctor is working on him.

And yes, Diet Mountain Lightning exists. That’s just so many steps removed from Sprite at this point.

Anyways, enough waxing long about train memories, lets get back to the show, because it’s not this season of Yugioh until there’s a problem with the commute.

Unrelated to Pharaoh punching the walls, everyone has “disappeared.”

My bro looked up the Wiki that says there's “no explanation for the missing train passengers” but we all know what that really means on this show, right?

So, how many people fit on Caltrain?

There’s just NO WAY they’re alive anymore, right? Like Yugioh went and killed 756 Bay Area passengers because...it’s a filler season!

I really feel like there’s just no way Seto or Bakura will ever catch up to Darts’ death count at this rate.

After this, we have ourselves this fun train-jumping trope.

Pretty sure it was the superhuman opposing force of Tea jumping from the back train to the front of the train that forced the back to lose all of it’s 100+ mph momentum and immediately come to a full and complete stop.

Not sure how Darts did this thing with the train separating. But he did. Or maybe it was Rex and Weevil? Either way, he somehow managed to do this well enough to strand Joey and Tristan on the other side of the line that now has no engine.

(course I say this like in 1400 AD the Bay wasn’t full of the Ohlone. this place was basically always developed because...the weather’s hella good when it’s not on fire.)

Now if you go East--southern Utah looks like this, and parts of me wonder if maybe the artists thought they were taking the train all the way to Florida. Did the English dub add “we’re taking the train to the airport” because they knew there was no one in their right mind in America who would take a California-Florida train?

I have no other explanation for why the Bay Area looks like this, than to assume that this is an alternate California where there never was a Loma Prieta Earthquake and also one where Seto and Pegasus bought out and destroyed both Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. Which makes Seto and Pegasus sound like just real true heroes, never paving any sort of way for Mark Zuckerberg to happen and unintentionally (or intentionally who knows) screw up our elections.

Or maybe that was entirely Darts? Maybe it was Darts who’s been eating up the Bay, harvesting nerd souls for the leviathan and knowing that no one will miss these Twitter developers if Twitter never happens in the first place. Especially if he’s just ghosting entire Caltrains willy nilly.

But anyway, fun fact about the Caltrain that the creators of this show didn’t know--the train is a push-pull train, so...It has an engine on both sides of the train. Joey and Tristan...still have an engine. It would have never stopped, even with Tea’s incredible backward momentum.

This is normal train stuff and is something you should always assume about a commuter train that cannot afford the time to reattach the locomotive in order to turn around, but we forget about this in TV shows basically all the time.

However, there are fantasy rules that we give to TV that we sort of don’t extend to other places. We suspend our disbelief for things like this train stopping in a track that would, realistically, have another train passing by in 10 minutes anyway. Things like rogue waves that topple over ocean liners. Or CEOs in Silicon Valley who have ass-length blue hair that is tied with one single hair precarious band.

The point at which we no longer can suspend our disbelief when it comes to TV is SO interesting to me. Because I’m fully willing to let go of the fact that Caltrain is A Push-Pull train because it’s still a fun trope although this can never really happen to you on...almost any train at all anymore. But if this were a movie? People would be losing their freakin MINDS. Look what they did after Star Wars. They lost their entire minds over force-field science that doesn’t even exist.

Like, maybe the people who made this episode really do know that San Jose is the 3rd largest city in California, and that this is a push-pull train, and that there are no mesas anywhere near the ocean of San Fransisco. Maybe they did know that--but they decided to suspend our disbelief by pushing this Wild Wild West fantasy aesthetic SO HARD so it makes it believable although this is just...so wrong. Mostly because...it’s fun TV. Not because it makes any sense, but because I would like to have fun instead of thinking.

Which is also how most romance novels work ps. But Yugioh, although *almost* understanding the key ingredient to how romance actually works, I will assume never figures that out.

I hope.

Also, Rex is here.

Bro would like to bring up that Red Eyes is not a rare card in the real world. So Rex is going out of his way to venge a card that costs...$4.50 at Target. That’s less than a meal at McDonalds. This card may have been in a Happy Meal at McDonalds.

*pictured here, the actual canyons of San Jose*

So something that’s interesting between Yami and Joey is that Yami gives in basically immediately and decides to duel Weevil, who would be very easy to just gently push off of this train. Joey on the other hand, looks down at both of his punching fists and is like “why would I bother?”

Not that it mattered, it’s just interesting that even Joey has more restraint than Yami, who has 0 restraint, apparently, when it comes to dueling cards.

Joey has more restraint that Yami, and Joey is the kid who has tried to punch out Seto Kaiba in nearly every conversation he has ever had with Seto Kaiba over the last 4 seasons.

Also, Tea is just standing on top of this train like it’s a completely normal day outside. Girl has no fear.

Wouldn’t these people be covered in bug guts? Like how are they not getting assaulted by so many flies and birds?

But because she has no decent cards the Oricalchos just kicks her out? I dunno. There’s a lot of weird physics in the next scene.

And she just grabs onto a moving train with her bare hands. I feel like Tea is just so woefully overpowered in this group but for the wrong game. I say this a lot. She’s like their One Punch Man but will never, ever know.

So anyway, that was a long time between updates and now I’m out of sync and behind on everything so...hell knows when the next update will be. Depends on the length of episode I guess? Bro really wants to get to what comes next soon though. He’ll pester me until I do it.

Now I can’t mention Mountain Lightning without sharing with you what you do with 2-4 liters of Mountain Lightning after your brother leaves and then just...doesn’t have enough room for all of his Mountain Lightning AND his baby in his car, so he just leaves it in your house.

It’s called Mountain Dew Cake <-(that is a link) and it’s actually pretty damn good.

I made this once and fed it to a British person and they were like “this is so decadent--what’s in this?” and I uh didn’t know how to respond to that other than “it’s really just Mountain Dew, I’m so sorry” and that was a lie, because it was full of Mountain Lightning.

Anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read these recaps in order.

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cashbanct · 5 years ago

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PROMPT LIST I Story Store

Ding~

Hello and welcome to the Story Store. If you need anything, I can help you!..... Oh, you don’t know how this works?.... Don’t worry, it’s really easy you don’t need to do much effort! You just have to imagine that you are building an ice cream! Yes, an ice cream!

First of all, you have to choose the flavour of your ice cream. You can choose between these Alternative Universe (also known as AU) flavour. It’s important because it gives the main taste of the Story. Choose your favourite one!

You can also choose more than one if you are really hungry but no more than two!

AUs Flavour:

Almond Honey – Prince/Princess/King/Queen

Birthday Cake – Special*

Bubble gum – University/High School

Butter pecan caramel – Supernatural*

Cherry Sorbet– Spy

Chocolate – CEO/Secretary/Business

Coffee – Coffee shop

Cookies and cream – Arranged Marriage

French Vanilla – Fake Dating

Green tea – Neighbors

Lemon Sorbet - Soulmates

Mango Sorbet – Bad Boy/Bad girl

Mojito (with Rhum) – Mafia

Pistachio – Roommates

Pineapple Sorbet – Greek Mythology

Strawberry Sorbet – Strangers/Enemies/Friends to lover

Watermelon Sorbet – Vampires/Werewolves

White chocolate – Angels/Demons

*These flavours contains some ingredients you need to be aware of:

Birthday Cake: has to specify which special AU you would like

Butter pecan caramel: has to specify which supernatural AU you would like

Nice! Now that you have chosen your flavour(s), you need to choose some toppings! These toppings are also knows as conversation prompts. You have to know that you can’t add more than 3 toppings, otherwise, your ice-cream will have too much on it.

Toppings Conversation prompts:

Syrup toppings (Angst):

Caramel – “Why did you do this? Was it just to hurt me?”

Milk Chocolate – “I hate you! I can’t believe this… I think I have never hated someone as much as I hate you now.”

Strawberry syrup– “Stop crying… I can’t act correctly when you cry.”

Cherry syrup – “It had to end eventually, right? You fell out of love with me.”

Raspberry syrup – “I am so sorry, I didn’t want to, but I had to.”

Blueberry syrup– “I told you, I can’t be fixed. Even if you tried all your life, I’ll stay like this.”

Red Fruits – “It hurts so much? Why does it hurt so much?”

Maple – “Why would I? I am nothing to you anyway…”

Nutella – “See this? You did this to me.”

Almond – “If you don’t do anything right now, I don’t think I’ll be able to continue.”

Melted White Chocolate – “Help me, please, help me.”

Pistachio Syrup– “Maybe, I can just end you right here…Won’t that be sweet?”

Dark Chocolate – “You see this? Well, that’s maybe the last thing you’ll see.”

Peanut Butter – “Did you? Really? How could you!”

Whipped Cream – “Hey, it’s alright, I am here. Don’t keep everything inside, please.”

Biscuits/Snacks toppings (Fluff):

Oreo – “You want to help me carry something? Here, take my hand”

M&M’s – “Oh, you are blushing! Yes, you are!”

Twix – “I thought the world was too scary, but with you, it isn’t anymore”

Reese’s – “Come on let’s go, we’ll have fun because I am here.”

Snickers – “Can I kiss you now?”

Mars – “I’ll do anything for you, you know that right?”

Kit Kat – “I can’t believe that I am lucky enough to be called yours.”

Maltesers – “You…you just… kissed me?”

Butterfinger – “Even if we are apart, just look up, I am under the same sky as you.”

Crunch – “You are so cute. Too much cuteness can kill me you know.”

Toblerone – “I can say it now, I love you, so much, I didn’t know I could love someone that much.”

Kinder – “You think you can walk so pretty like that and that I wouldn’t want to hug you?”

White Chocolate Hershey’s – “Well, as much as I love you, and that’s a lot, trust me, I can’t do that.”

Lion – “Wait, do you think the same thing as what I am thinking right now?”

Bounty – “Can we stay like this forever? Or just five more minutes?”

Fruits toppings (Smut):

Strawberry – “Yes, just right there, don’t stop.”

Cherry – “Oh? You like to play like that, don’t you?”

Pineapple – “Yes baby, tonight, I am the one in charge.”

Mango – “See, naked like this, you’re the prettiest.”

Grape – “And if you move, you know what you’ll get.”

Watermelon – “Come on baby, you’re doing so good, so good for me.”

Banana – “Oh baby, don’t act like that now, you know you can take it.”

Blueberry – “You remember your safe-words right?”

Raspberry – “And a kiss here, and here… but not here.”

Peach – “Such a pretty ass I want to paint red so bad.”

Apple – “Look at me, don’t look away.”

Pear – “So sweet, so so sweet… I can’t stop going for more.”

Melon – “Now, when I see you wearing clothes, I will remember all the hickeys that I had hidden on your body.”

Kiwi – “You don’t want me to stop? But you have been bad baby.”

Plum – “On your knees and don’t move.”

Crazy Toppings (Other):

Sprinkles – “Oh man, why did I say yes to that?”

Cereals – “It’s too early to wake up? 1pm? Yeah, that’s what I said, too early…”

Chocolate chips – “I do want to try, but not right now.”

Expresso grounds – “Coffee. I can only hear the word Coffee right now.”

Marshmallows – “I don’t think this is allowed… so why are we doing it?”

Bear candy – “I may be dumb sometimes, but that idea is impossible.”

Sour candy – “Yeah try it, if it won’t kill you than it’s good.”

Grilled almond – “You did it! I am so ashamed of you now.”

Grilled pistachio – “I thought it was awkward before but now, damn.”

Lolly pops – “And pop, it vanished! You see?”

Sugar cane – “Come in, you won’t regret it now, but maybe later.”

Cotton Candy – “You want to WHAT? No way!”

Skittles – “I didn’t do it, you didn’t do it, the neighbor’s dog didn’t do it, so, who did it?”

White Chocolate chips - “Correct me if I am wrong, I mean, don’t, but I may be right for once in my life.”

Salty Caramels pistachio – “Oh. My. God. No way, no freaking way.”

Awesome! Now that you have finished to pick your toppings, you have to tell me with which person would you like the story to be about or in reality share your ice cream with!

Perfect! Now that you have selected everything for your ice cream story, you can come pick it up! Don’t forget that Story Shop takes a bit of time to proceed with all its demands, but I’m sure you understand!

I hope you had a good time at Story Shop and that you will come back soon!

Ding~

A/N – Thanks for taking time to answer. I want you to know that I write about BTS, NCT, WayV, EXO, ATEEZ mostly but I can try to write about other groups! Take care (:

#prompts #writing #prompts masterlist

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wlw-imagines-blog · 5 years ago

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Abandonment, Enthroned {Part 2} (Wanda Maximoff x Reader)

Part 1

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Blood, alcohol,

Word Count: 2.3k

Tags: Apocalypse au, No powers au, angst, hurt, whump, comfort, enemies to friends to lovers

Summary: Y/N tries to make sense of the stranger sleeping in her bed, creating some mysteries that need explanations. Tension in the house rise and fall as Wanda and Y/N try to find harmony despite a tumultuous meeting.

You woke up with a headache and a bad taste in your mouth. The sun had set, and darkness had settled over the estate. Your hand flailed, catching the analogue clock on the dresser.

1:24 am.

“Fuck,” you hissed, jumping up and immediately regretting it. Your head pounded, forcing your stomach to flip.

Ignoring the discomfort, you left the room and sped through the evening routine. You ran out the front door, lantern in one hand, ring of keys in the other, both shaking madly as you sprinted to the barn. You locked the barn’s padlock, making sure Goat was safe with enough water and hay for the night. Next was the greenhouse locks that took almost no time.

Standing out in the dark was terrifying. Every rustle and noise made your heart leap into your throat, and the hairs stand up on your neck.

You made it back to the house, locking the front gate behind you.

The ground floor windows had to be shut, the interior metal shutters were drawn and locked. The front, back, and side doors were then locked and barred. All lights were turned off or extinguished, then the generator was shut off.

You let yourself breathe easier. The house was as secure as possible.

The bathroom was still a fucking mess. You set to work, lighting two oil lamps, taking lemon and vinegar to scrub down the tiles until the blood was mostly gone before tackling the red soup of towels and clothes in the bathtub. It was an hour before Wanda’s clothes were clean, and the towels were permanently tinged pink. You lost count how many times you drained and refilled the tub. On the third re-fill, you prayed to god that the well still had enough water until the next rain fall.

You hand-rung out Wanda’s clothes, fingers aching by the time you finished her jacket.

Just as you dropped the coat into the basket of garments, something metallic caught your eyes.

Pinned to the front of the jacket, just above the right breast, was a name tag.

Maximoff. You looked at it, storing away that information. Was that Wanda’s last name?

The girl in the other room was a mystery. She wore dog tags and old army gear with a scratched out insignia. Had she been a part of the militia? Were you housing a fugitive? She didn’t fight like a soldier, and you doubted that a member of the New Alliance militia would not have shot you on sight. You shook the thought from your head. Where did this woman come from.

You took the towels to the kitchen to dry, eyes landing on the bag she had dropped by the door. Staring at it for a few seconds, you slowly placed the basket on the table, and made your way to the satchel. Your curiosity was piqued, but the threat of danger lingered in your belly alongside the whiskey.

It was heavy in your hands, and guilt swelled as you opened the bag. Your mouth was dry as you sat at the kitchen table, slowly removing the contents one by one.

A compact mirror, a tin of pills, a smaller hunting knife, band aids, matches, and a thick, leather bound journal.

There was nothing in here that could’ve helped Wanda survive in the wilderness. You were shocked she had even made it for this long. Of all the items, the journal intrigued you the most. What stopped you was the string tied around the book. It was tied up with a complicated knot, one that you would be able to re-tie if undone.

You sighed. Wanda would be angry as all hell if she knew you were rifling through her stuff. Sliding everything back into their original positions, saving the journal for last. Your fingers brushed against something at the bottom of the bag. You pulled out a small, folded photograph.

Your hands trembled as you unfolded the paper.

The picture was of two teenagers, a boy and a girl with identical smiles. You immediately identified the girl as Wanda. Her hair was much darker in the photo, and her face had less lines and dark circles. She was care free and happy. The young man had his arm around Wanda, who was pretending to look exasperated with him. The young man had dyed blonde hair, and the same blue eyes as Wanda. He wore a military uniform, laughing and smiling at the camera.

You flipped the photo.

Pietro and Wanda, October 2015, was written in black ink.

Was this her brother? Your turned it over to look at the image once more. They had the same eyes, mouth, and skin tone. A grimace flickered on your lips. This photo had been taken five months before the Protection of the Constitute was set into motion.

Slipping the photo back into the bag, you took the laundry upstairs, ponder Wanda and her past.

You passed your room where Wanda was sleeping. You were surprised to hear her gentle snores through the door. You guessed the Advils and Jameson worked. It calmed you to know that her pain was somewhat manageable. What unnerved you was the the idea of a stranger sleeping in your bed.

After laying out the towels, you drank water, trying to push the headache down. It was well past two in the morning by the time you settled back into the guest room’s bed, and well past three in the morning when you finally well asleep.

***

Wanda was sitting up when you opened the door. It was just after nine when you went to check on her, making sure that she had not died at some point in the night. Her eyes were collecting information about everything in the room; the desk in the corner, cluttered with papers, the dusty book shelf that hadn’t been visited in months, the various articles of clothing that was strewn about the room. You felt anxious, as though Wanda was slowly combing through everything, and finding out more and more. Her fingers absently played with the silver dog tags.

“How are you doing?” You carefully probed.

“It fucking hurts,” she snarled, not looking at you in the eye.

“I’m sorry to hear that. Do you need anything to drink? Or eat?”

“No.”

“You haven’t eaten anything since you’ve been here, and I don’t count whiskey as a drink.”

“Whatever, I’m fine.”

‘Starving yourself won’t help the wound heal.”

She said nothing to that, and you turned around to leave.

“Y/n.” You stopped.

Wanda cleared her throat. “I am a little thirsty. Something to eat would be nice.”

You fought down a small smile. “Give me a few minutes.”

While heating up a can of chicken and vegetable soup, you prepared a pot of black tea.

“It should help with inflammation,” you explained to Wanda as you placed the tray in front of her. “Careful, the soup is really hot.”

“Thank you,” she murmured.

You pulled desk chair up next to the bed. ‘Listen, I know this situation is… not ideal. But I want to help you, Wanda. You can stay for as long as you need to get better, with only three conditions; one, don’t try to kill me. Two, do not steal from me. Anything you need, you just have to ask, and I’ll see what I can do, okay?”

Wanda nodded, dragging her spoon around the bowl.

“Third, any rooms with locked doors are off limits. Don’t try to get into those rooms.”

She squinted. “is this the part where I find out you’re a serial killer?”

“Yup,” you hummed, standing up. “It was only a matter of time.”

Wanda sipped her tea and rolled her eyes.

“I meant what I said last night, Wanda,” You turned to leave the room. “I want to help you as much as possible.” you thought about the photograph in her bag. Everyone is struggling these days.”

Wanda stared into her soup as you closed the door behind you.

For the next four days, you brought Wanda meals in the morning, afternoon, and evening. When you were not in the barn or in the fields, you were helping Wanda into the shower, and into clean clothes.

The cut was only a few centimeters wide and even fewer deep, but still hindered Wanda’s mobility greatly. A film of sweat would cover her face whenever you helped her to the master bathroom. Her lips would grow thin, like she was gritting her teeth through the pain.

You changed the bandages everyday, watching the reserve rolls of gauze slowly dwindle.

On the fifth day, you were in the kitchen when you heard the stairs creak.

“What the fuck are you doing up?” You asked Wanda harshly, watching her descend the staircase. Her hands gripped the banister so tightly, her knuckles were white.

“I hate staying in bed all day,” She said, beads of sweat forming on her brow.

You rounded the corner, meeting her at the foyer. Your arms automatically slipped under her shoulders, careful not to touch the bandage. “You’re not well enough to be moving around. I’m getting your ass back into bed.”

“I’m not a fucking sick child,” Wanda snapped, pulling away from you. Her balance had not returned, and she teetered. “I was stabbed, not given polio.”

Shaking your head, you turned and went back to the kitchen. You begrudgingly prepared a light breakfast of bread and jam with an apples and a few grapes for her.

Wanda slowly seated herself at the kitchen table, grimacing at the pain. As you dropped the plate in front of her, she shot you a quizzical look. “Thank you, y/n.”

“Coffee or tea?” you ignored the gratitude.

She rolled her eyes. “Coffee. two sugars, no cream.”

As you set the kettle on the stove, Wanda ate in a surprisingly quiet fashion. Her eyes moved around the kitchen to the doorway that led to the living room, then back to the plate in front of her.

“How do you live here?”

Ah, the silence was too good to be true. “What do you mean?”

“You know,” she waved a hand eloquently. “How have you survived this long?”

“I grow everything here. There’s an orchid, a vineyard, and a corn and wheat field. I make due.”

There were three more tins of instant coffee if you included the one in your hand, and two more bags of sugar in the cellar.

You made a mental note to to go into town in a few weeks; after Wanda left.

“What about meat? or grain? Do you have any cows?” She inquired, fingers pinching the corner of her bread.

You blinked. Wanda was so strange; one second she was volatile, the next she was curious and asking question after question.

“I hunt whatever’s in the forest, but there isn’t much. I have a mortar and pestle to make flour from the grain and corn.” You stirred her coffee and placed it in front of her.

Wanda played with the teaspoon. “And everything else?”

“There’s an abandoned town about three miles south of here. When you’re completely healed up, and on your way, I suggest you go there.” Your heart swooped suddenly. Where you being too forth coming with information?

“What do you mean?”

You seated yourself across from Wanda, reminding yourself to play it smart. “This house is something of a rest stop for travelers, Wanda. More people than you would think often come this way, tired, hungry, and in need of help. I do what I can to make living a bit easier.”

“You have a pretty nice place here,” she said, and you felt suspicion flicker. “Hasn’t anyone tried to rob you?”

You tilted your head, forcing your voice to stay light. “They have. They’ve failed.”

“What if I tried to rob you?” The smile on her face was dangerous.

You returned her look. “Then I’ll stab you again, Wanda.” You stood up, looking down at her. “And the next time, I’ll let you bleed out.”

You went and pulled out the bottle of Advil, counting six in the bottle before shaking out two and placing them in front of Wanda. There was no need to tell her that you did not have the heart to stab anyone ever again, and that last night you had totally acted on instinct.

Sometimes acting tough was far more efficient than actually being tough.

You put the pills on the table. “Is that it?”

“Probably not.” She was back to her usual sullen demeanor. She took the pills with her coffee. “Where’s my bag?”

You retrieved the satchel from the living room, breath tight in your chest. “Your clothes still need to dry, but I managed to get most of the blood out.”

Wanda rooted through her bag, seemingly satisfied when she found everything in its place.

Was this the right time to ask her about her past? You watched her subconsciously run a hand over her hip where the cut was. Maybe not now.

You bit you lip before speaking. “Since you’re well enough to walk, I’m not going to bring your meals to the room. You have to come to me.”

Despite your tone, she smiled. “Aye Aye, Captain.”

You forced yourself to ignore the way her lips, chapped and grey, created dimples when she smiled. The image of her and that boy in the picture flickered in you mind, and you bit back the question that threatened to spill.

“But don’t try and impress me. If it hurts, go lie down and take a break,” You cleared your throat, pulling on your jacket and boots. “I don’t want those stitches to rip.”

“Where are you going?” Wanda asked, dusting off her hands.

You unlocked the kitchen’s side door. “I have a farm I need to attend to, a goat to feed, and apples to pick. I’ll be back by lunch.”

Wanda watched the screen door slap shut as you left, stirring her coffee.

***

Part 3, found here;

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff imagines #scarlet witch x reader #scarlet witch imagines #marvel fanfic #marvel fic #apocalypse au #no powers au #hurt #comfort #whump #enemies to friends to lovers

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no-no-no-ahhhh · 5 years ago

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I'm having bad anxiety so I'm just going to answer these questions rn

Okay so when having anxiety I over think and I barely have any friends so I thought if using these questions to keep my mind off things and it kinda works it's also why some are long because I'm trying my best to think about other things then my stress. Maybe some of yall can try this if you want. Could help idk

Questions belong to @tr33-g1rl

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Soda cans

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

I LOVE chocolate bro

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Cotton candy because let's all be honest bubble gum doesn't even tast good so that just leaves texture and cotton candy dissolves abs you could always have normal gum

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Some would say nice hard working smart and dyslexic but that's what they say not actually think

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

I've never really had the soda bottles but for now Ig soda cans because I feel like it keeps it fresher then the plastic and plastic is bad

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Umm out of all these ig tomboy my style that I try to go for more rn is kinda like bille eyelash baddie style

7. earbuds or headphones?

Def earbuds cuz headphones if left on too long start hurting and squeezing my head

8. movies or tv shows?

TV shows 100% I cant consum media for long (my anxiety)so cartoons are the best for me because they're usually 11 minutes and light hearted

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Hmm this is good question in my head summer looks so good ahh but I've never really had a sent for it cuz the past few years I've been in my room but I love the sun oh and you know when your about to go in the pool and you can smell the Clorox mixed with the sun block and that smell just smells like a soft nice energy and there is this one tropical sent havent really smelt it in years I remember the one time I got to smell it was in middle school in the girls locker room so ig it was a perfume idk if it was really associated with summer or it was just tropical perfume my mom could spray on anytime of the year

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Lol none I hated p.e I was also pretty tall at the time so people expected me to play but I just wanted to hide in the corner

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Well I don't really like breakfast that much I think food in the morning makes me nauseous but I have to eat it cuz I can't eat school lunch food cuz that shit is nasty but breakfast school food is 😉 so I usually get banana bread and good ass duch chocolate milk

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Por Vida is one of my favorite albums if that counts

13. lanyard or key ring?

I hate things being around my neck so key ring

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Mexican candy

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

The outsiders

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Your butt relaxing ig and not hunched over idk how some people do their work not hunched over like how do you see what your working on

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

These white Adidas with 3 halo strips and tan boots

18. ideal weather?

To wear you can soak in the sun but not have it burn you right when you go outside and kinda breezy not a fan of the cold and whatever weather that isn't effected by global warming is the best

19. sleeping position?

I always try not to sleep on my back cuz then they say that the demons come for you

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

I have a lot of journals and books to write

21. obsession from childhood?

My little pet shops, barbies, fnaf, teen titans, monster high dolls, beanie babes, never brats or the ever after high dolls cuz I had a fear of big heads as a kid

22. role model?

Em their are not many people to look up to these days but Quenlin Blackwell is even though she struggles with depression and seasonal depression she still is a qween love her

23. strange habits?

24. favorite crystal?

Hmm maybe amethyst one of the only ones I have

25. first song you remember hearing?

No idea

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Be in the sun

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Not have the seasonal depression come for me

38. lemonade or tea?

Lemonade bro tea is kinda weak and for BrItish blocks , but today I did have a bunch of lemons and they got me sick cuz I dont have a healthy balanced diet if anybody knows simple healthy recipes that have little to no cooking pls share

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

I've never actually have had lemon pie but I have been thinking about making pie. I've had peacon pie and water burger apple pie and McDonald's apple pie and I think another fast food pie but I can't remember the flavor. I know the other flavor exist because my mom order a different pie flavor from me once and she said we can both try each others. Maybe it was lemon. I think lemon tast is quit forgettable thow idk I always put other things on my lemon and lemonade has all that sugar and speaking of Britain I think they carbonate their lemons . But I think I've only had lemon cake 2 times , so if the cake

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

School is lame and that's on period pooh

41. last person you texted?

Umm this girl I barely know and I'm going to leave it at that cuz this story makes me kinda sad and worried and I'm answering these questions to avoid that

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Hmm good question , I think jacket because they are bigger and girl Jean's have the pockets different to make the booty look better and sometimes that leads to uncomfortable pockets and front pockets barely exit for girls and jackets sometimes have those secret pockets only you have assess too like the ones on the inside and jacket pockets are bigger

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

1. hoodies are good for when you dont have a bra on and they come with one BIG pocket and you dont need to worry about a shirt

2. Leather jackets are for cool kidz and carry a nice vibe and still thick enough to keep you warm , but you can't really get them wet I think so you can't wash em , but they can come with cool designs on the back but their better fitted on perfectly on a person and if you grow they just look odd on you then you have to buy another and that's not fun

3.Bomber jacket , it's a whole style but one I try to pull of but just cant do it well

4.Cardigans kinda umm not a fan but good if your wearing a dress that's shows your shoulders and you are insecure about that being shown. Remember when somewhere in the 2000s they told us that cardigans where so easy to put on and throw more into your outfit so people bought quit a few. I do

5.I feel like jeans jackets aren't warm enough maybe their more for the summer?

44. favorite scent for soap?

Hmm maybe something tropical or just those cool lavender ones that have oats that's cool I like oats in my soap

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

I hate sci-fi uhhhg and super hero kinda ties in with that so fantasy and when reading fan fic just sweet simple domestic fluff

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Hmm not sure but the shirt has to be soft. I only experience soft shirts like that few times in my life

47. favorite type of cheese?

Mexican cheese and blue cheese uhg and mozzarella with that crust, yum🤤

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? Errrum maybe a watermelon cuz they are very hydrated. Oh and watermelon with the big black seeds is better then that soul less watermelon

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

None dawg I really need to find one but I do have a lot written down In a book

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Omg my aunt had some funny looking ass dogs I couldn't stop laughing. One of her dogs hate me tho now

51. current stresses? I dont want to talk about it cuz I dont want to worry but I was crying for more then 6 hours probably 8 when I think about it and then today as well and it's so bad I'm not even going to school

52. favorite font? I like the one kali uchis uses in one of her albums I think it's called fairy tell or something

53. what is the current state of your hands?pretty dry cuz I wash them alot and kinda long nails cuz of genetics

54. what did you learn from your first job?

I havent had a first job

55. favorite fairy tale?

Hmmm something with the tooth fairy

56. favorite tradition?

Idk holidays cuz I get school off

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Depression and I would say anxiety but no

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

I dont have any talents

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

Uuuuyg idk too stressed to really think that I dont even know what type of video game I would be in

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

nothing stressful maybe something calm like a farm anime, some light magic, pokemon things like that

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

I was never ment to live life like a sim - megan the stallion

62. seven characters you relate to?

Anybody with anxiety, kinda pearl from Steven universe, the nerdy part of dipper from gravity falls , Roman from sander sides if virgil too sense he has anxiety okay and that's all I can think of I think early I said I dont really watch media or stuff so yeah

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Gosolina kali uchis songs and bank account that's all I can think about rn

64. favorite website from your childhood?64. favorite website from your childhood?

Y8 brooo oh and there was Disney or Nickelodeon websites you know that show with the hands and they had the googly eyes they had a g as new for that loved it and for Disney they had zack and cody games on their website and it's not a website but the one thing on windows that would work without wifi you know and you could make cakes and give them faces and try matching the cards

65. any permanent scars?

One time a cat scratched me more the like 8 years ago and I can still faintly see the mark

66. favorite flower(s)?

The one that grows on the cactus

67. good luck charms?

I know a rabbits foot is one and 4 leaf clovers,and markipliers flannel. I sadly dont have any personal good luck charms

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

I don't want to talk about bad foods rn cut the cameras

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

idk I think I can vaguely remember every facts orgin that I know

70. left or right handed?

Basic right handed but my dad used to be left but then the school forced him to be right

71. least favorite pattern?

Anything 80s uhg that shit is disgusting and terrifying

72. worst subject?

Chemistry but I just got out of that so that's fun

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

People day hot cheetos and sour cream is odd but I like it . I would wat some rn but I think I got sick cuz of my poor diet so I'm not. Someone pls suggested simple easy foods for your girl who can cook

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

1 I am big baby

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I dont know

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Tater tots are good and fries

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Idk no green thumb

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Idk ig coffee

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Jewel tones

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Theirs a difference?

82. pc or console?

Console it's just simpler

83. writing or drawing?

Uhhheg ig drawing I'm bad at grammar

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcast, podcast are just more plans out then talk radio and talk radio is a morning thing and I'm not the biggest fan of mornings

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Fairy tales mythology kinda ruff ya know

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cookies their just more sturdy and their is always normal cake

87. your greatest fear?

Tooo many things and I'm having an anxiety attack right now so like no

88. your greatest wish?

Well it's cute and all idk to live peacefully is one part the other parts a secret for now

X.o.x.o gossip girl ya know ya love me

89. who would you put before everyone else?

Umm maybe myself Idk

90. luckiest mistake?

One time my mom ordered a foam sord for my brother and a real one came. It was some anime sword

91. boxes or bags?

Bags cuz they look cute and you can take em every where with you. Disposable I would have to say boxes tho because its less damaging to the environment

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Sunlight is so warm and it fills something inside of me makes me feel cozy

Lamps are great for when sleeping and your scared of the dark

Fairy lights are cute but are they neccessary

Overhead lights are good for when you just need light in your life

Am I the only one who gets sad and sometimes cant clean if it's dark in the house?

94. favorite season?

Summer I think. I know it's harder for me to function in the winter cuz depression but then summer is anxiety sometimes ya know

95. favorite app on your phone?

Littetly no idea I don't really love/like the things on my phone if their more distractions or time wasters but I do love how I can search up useful things on YouTube to try to calm down my anxiety and I was definitely not a fan of tumblr at all but I kind have made it my safe place a bit

96. desktop background?

Well the computers my dad's so it has deadpool on i

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

Barely 2 ,I am kinda a dummy sorry unggv

98. favorite historical era?

Well idk heehaww cowboys?

#trifle utters #misspelling because ya girls pretty stressed #im just trying to cope rn so dont cap on me

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merrymcfuckyourself · 6 years ago

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Dumb S-Word Headcannons for Ralsei because I’m horny and stupid

(I left out 3 questions and edited 1 just because I just didn’t feel like trying to answer them. With that said, let’s throw away the last scraps of dignity I have to my name.)

🤒: How often do they get sick? What kinds of illnesses do they tend to get most often? Colds, flu, sinus infections, stomach viruses?

Ralsei tends to get sick only slightly more than an average young monster would, so maybe 2 or 3 times a year. A regular chest/head cold is the most common, but he is prone to the flu if it happens to be going around.

🌡: Do they tend to run hot or cold? When they have a fever, is it barely noticeable, or does their temperature skyrocket?

It’s common for his temperature to get pretty high and spike a couple of times, at most getting to 103. at it’s peek.

😷: When they’re sick, do they stay home or go to work/school? If they don’t go to work or school, do they try to rest, or do they just go on with their day like normal? Do they try to avoid getting others sick by taking precautions like a mask or staying away from others in general?

He can be a rather stubborn patient if there’s work to be done, but either way doesn’t put up much of a fight if someone forces him to rest. He normally would insist on isolating himself to prevent the spread of illness, but would still go along with it if his friends insisted on sticking by him (Especially considering Kris knows how much he hates being alone)

🤧: What does their sneeze sound like? (Description, spelling, or both!)

eh...Hah-!HHAshuu-! *(can range in pitch or volume but buildup is almost always involved one way or another)

😩: Do they tend to sneeze just once or twice, or multiple times? Do they have fits frequently or rarely? Does how many times they sneeze depend on the cause?

It’s more common for him to just have fits of 2 or 3 depending on the cause, but if the stars align then he can go into an uncontrollable fit that lasts for about 1 minute.

🌸: Are they allergic to any kind of plants? Flowers, weeds, trees? If yes, how bad are their allergies to those plants?

Ralsei actually loves the flowers of the Lightner World, that being said, some of them and most weeds/trees around Allergy Season more often than not can send him into those minute-long fits as previously mentioned

🕯: Are they allergic to other things? Dust, animals, perfumes, certain fragrances? Anything that might be considered “out of the ordinary” to be allergic to? How bad are those allergies?

Aside from the pollen allergies I mentioned above, there’s nothing else really that severe.

👃: In general, how sensitive is their nose? Can something like a certain flower or smell make them sneeze even if they’re not allergic to it? Do they sneeze a lot on average, or not very much? Does their nose twitch a lot, or barely ever at all?

Something like a feather or even someone else’s hair (usually Kris’) can set him off. This one weakness has been taken advantage of by Susie more than once. Other than that he pretty much never sneezes without a clear cause. Also, more often with allergies, his muzzle will twitch like a bunny rabbit right before sneezing, another thing Susie likes to make fun of him for when it happens.

😭: When they’re sick, do they try to downplay their symptoms, or do they treat every little cold like the plague? Do they whine a lot, or do they complain quietly or even just in their head?

He always stays pretty quiet about his suffering even when he feels miserable, but it’s still easy to tell even if he’s not whining about it.

✨: What would be the best way for someone to induce them? Feathers, rolled-up tissue, or something else? How much stimulation would it take for them to start sneezing? Would inducing produce just one or two sneezes from them, or multiples?

He’s pretty easy to induce with just a few strokes from a feather or tickling him with Kris’s hair (god fucking dammit it hurt my brain to type that but my body was all for it)

💦: How wet are their sneezes? Do they spray barely at all, or are you gonna need an umbrella? Do they try to cover at all, or just let it go? Do they sniffle a lot when they’re sick or allergies are bugging them?

Picture a full spray bottle of Water. That is all I’ll say

🤝: Do they like to be taken care of when they’re not feeling well? Or do they hate it when people fuss over them? If they do, what’s their favorite thing about being taken care of? If not, why don’t they like being taken care of? How bad would they have to be before they’d let anyone take care of them in any capacity?

Ralsei tolerates being taken care of, and silently appreciates someone caring about him enough to take time out of their day and do so.

💊: Do they take their medicine like a grown-up, or do they try to fight it? Do they prefer pills or liquid medicine? Can they be “tricked” by having the medicine mixed with applesauce or with a drink, or would they still not take it even then?

The first couple times it was easy to get him to take it because he wasn’t aware that pretty much all liquid medicine tastes awful. Even now, he’ll either choke it down with little to no fuss, or politely ask if he could just take it in pill form, and failing that, mix it in some apple juice and he’ll never tell the difference.

🍲: What do they like to eat while they’re sick? Do they like soup, or would they prefer something that isn’t “sick person food”? Do they lose their appetite when they’re sick, or are they hungrier than usual?

He loses any appetite for food, pretty much just surviving on water if you let him. Susie’s the only one who basically scared him into eating some cheese and crackers or else she’d hurt him (which was probably just an empty threat but he’s not gonna take that risk)

🍵: Do they like tea when they’re not feeling well? If so, do they like it with honey, lemon, both, with something else, or just plain? Would they accept something else if they couldn’t have tea? If they don’t like tea, is there something they’d rather drink instead? Would they drink tea if their preferred drink wasn’t available?

He may not like food, but he always appreciates a cup of tea on any day.

😔: What are their “tells” when they’re not feeling their best? Do they sleep more or less? Do they become easily irritated, aggressive, snap at little things? Or do they withdraw and become quieter, cry at the drop of a hat, stay in the background? What’s the one surefire way that one of their loved ones would be able to tell that they’re sick?

He goes from perky and good at holding conversations to tired and quiet, not speaking unless spoken to and even then you might have to shout his name once or twice to get his attention.

❄️: Would it be more unusual to see this character sick during the winter or during the summer? Do they typically go down during cold and flu season, or do they usually get summer colds?

He’ll often get sick as soon as the seasons shift or any little (or major) bug is going around. If it’s cold and flu season, he’s typically the first to get sick but the first to fully recover.

🎤: How does their voice change when they’re sick or allergies are bugging them? Does their voice get lower? Scratchy? Raspy? Can you hear any congestion in their voice or do they hide it well? Do they avoid speaking too much because of a sore throat and coughing, or do they try to talk through those things?

His voice pretty much disappears completely by the peek of a bad cold/flu

⚙️: Do they have some kind of ritual that they do when they’re not feeling great that helps? Does it help physically, or does it just make them feel better emotionally?

If he can’t sleep (coughing, congestion, ect), he’ll read a book until he knocks out. Usually happens only an hour or 2 into reading.

😳: Are they embarrassed by their sneezes, or do they just not really care? Do they apologize after sneezing? Do they say “sorry!” or “excuse me!” or anything like that? If they’re embarrassed about it, why?

Susie’s taunting of his sneeze has made him a chronic apologizer, even if she’s not around anywhere.

😥: What would they do if somebody gave them a gift that they’re allergic to? Would they say they’re allergic to it or not? Try to give it back, keep it, or get rid of it later?

He’d insist on keeping the gift and probably hold onto it until someone else forcibly took it from him and threw it away.

📝: Quick! Come up with a scenario for them! It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, just something you think would be cute or something you’d like to see with them!

you have made a grave error in giving me this power Soo, my favorite allergy scenario for Ralsei is admittedly one like to give a lot of characters/OTPs I’m obsessed with. Hanging out or going on a date with someone (Kris) in a meadow, but suddenly having a reaction to the flowers around them, but not wanting to leave and ruin their outing until they’re basically a not sohuman Tap and struggling to breathe, making their SO drag their stubborn ass out of there for their own health and safety.

My favorite Sick Fic scenario for him that I’m totally not just conjuring up in my head as I type this would beee...Ral is sick and him and Kris are the only ones in the house, effectively forcing Kris into the role of sole caretaker. They finally convinced the kid to lay down and sleep, and the place he happened to drop was right on Kris’s stomach while laying on the couch. So they’re laying there, pinned to the couch watching TV or something, when without warning, Ralsei sneezes into his sweater, getting that one spot all damp, and immediately falling back asleep, leaving a shocked and silently pissed off Kris.

And that’s it! What, were you expecting a joke or something?

#snz #sneezing kink #sneezkink #sneezingkink #whump #sick whump #whump prompts #allergies #sick fic #i am definitely going to hell for this

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bolbianddolanhouse · 6 years ago

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BNHA AU [self insert]

Nani the heck is this? read here!

Chapter 1: *plays Joji’s Yeah Right*

“...and heres your living quarters, fully furnished and with groceries that’ll last a while” said my case worker as I meekly followed next to them.

“thank you! its really nice.” I said, trying to not sound sad.

“I know its tough being young and by yourself, but I believe in you Miss Palma! Don’t hesitate to give us a call if you have questions or need other arrangments.”

“thank you for your kind words, I’ll keep that in mind” I said as politely as I could because I knew I wasn’t going to call them for shit. “Ill get my luggage out of my car, its not much so I’ll be fine if you need to leave”

“oh alright, Ill leave you to settling in and remember that a UA staff will be coming by with your uniforms tomorrow in the afternoon.”

oh jeez I forgot about that, not looking forward to get fat shamed in this country, let alone by a school staff. “oh right! it almost slipped my mind that here you wear uniforms in high school! hehe thank you for the reminder!”

“no problem! Bye bye”

oof! I was getting tired of pretending to be polite to that case worker. The past 3 months has been tough with the whole being sent away from my family and finding a school with nearby housing. At least I can sleep well without thinking where I’ll end up next. I unpack my 3 suitcases of clothes, personal belongings, cosmetics and other nessities. I take out my framed photo of my family and place it on my bed stand, I miss them and the doggos. I try not to cry and continue to put my things away. I made myself dinner, took a bath and laid in bed; and I’m thinking if I should call my parents to tell them I got settled. I checked the time, it was 4am their time, I sent a text instead.

[Hola mama y papa! ya estoy en mi apartamento, es muy lindo. Llama me cuando puedas, te extrano mucho y tambien a los doggos!]

I haven’t talked to my parents in a week because of the whole phone arrangement and being too busy with the entrance exam. Now I guess I’ll sleep and do some school supply shopping after meeting with the staff member.

-the next day-

Its saturday and its gloomy out and I wake up thinking, great! even the sky knows its going to be a rough day today! I get dressed, eat and gluzzle down my daily 2 cups of coffee. I scroll through my private social media handles to check on my friends, looks like they’re having fun, without me. I suck in the tears because I know DAMN well they’re sad I’m gone too. I distract myself with memes and I think maybe I should make some tea? and some cookies too? do i even have tea? I go through the cupboads and pantry, the case worker wasn’t kidding when they said that I had groceries that’ll last a while! I had 2 different types of tea, dry pastas, canned goods, snacks and some traditional ingredients for japanese and mexican cusine. I go searching for a kettle or teapot and I find a juicer in the way back of the top cupboard. There was a note on the juicer that said ‘to the next tenant, my wife didn’t want to take this big, messy thing to our next place, hope you find use out of this!’ I laugh at the idea that there was probably a lovers quarral over the juicer. I make tea and some green juice, just so I can get rid of the bundle of kale in the fridge, I hate kale. I make some cookies too but its just so I can get my mind off things since I was so nervous on meeting this staff member. Right on the dot, at 3pm, theres a knock at my door. I look through the peep hole and I see this woman with blue eyes and dark purple-ish, black hair in busniess causal attire. I open the door and put on my best ‘everything is ok’ face.

“hello! are you Miss Palma?”

“yes I am! are you the UA staff member with the uniforms?”

“I am! its so nice to meet you, I am Kayama sensei or better know as Midnight”

“Midnight? Ok um, would you like to come inside?”

“oh yes, thank you! Now I understand that you live alone?” she said as she walked in to the apartment.

“yes thats correct, I got here yesterday and settled in”

“oh wow, and at such a young age! Well If you need anything or need to talk about anything thats bothering you, please let me know! This whole you being separated from family and home worries me” She said in the most sincer tone that I almost started crying. I haven’t heard single person talk to me so genuinely since I left America and I need a trusted adult to help me, I heavily considered her offer.

“oh thank you for your offer, I might need some help in a few weeks BUT for now, may I offer you some tea? coffee? green juice? maybe some cookies?”

“green? juice? whats in it? I’ve never heard of green juice before”

“oh right! its a California health culture thing. Its the juice of pinapple, apple, kale, lemon and cucumber. The combination of the fruits and vegetables is for a healthy disgestive system and energy for before or after exersize”

“that sounds tasty! Ill have green juice please”

I serve her the juice and sit across from her in the living room. I see the clothing bags and think that thats alot of clothing bags just to give me 3 sets of uniforms. She drinks the juice and wanted to say something about my expression when I saw the bags but her eyes widened and she looked at the cup of juice.

“OH MY GOODNESS! this is the best and freshest juice I’ve ever had NO JOKE! You said this is a thing where you’re from? I need to invest in a juicer to make this at home!” she said so shocked and I was surprised to recieve the praise like I invented the juice.

“I’m glad you like it! Its like a little slice of my hometown to me to you”

“oh? ok back to business! I see you eyeing the uniforms, you want to try them on? I brought some sizes up and down from the given mesurements.”

“um ok sure! Let me take these to try on in my room, ill be right out”

I take the bags to my room and I zip them open and I see the white collared shirts, gray blazer looking thing and skirts. I think oh jeez my ass is definately not gonna fit in these bitches. I put on the shirt and blazer that best fit and lastly the skirt, SUPRIZE! you can see my ass cheeks hanging out from the bottom. I walk out of the room to Midnight.

“ok so I found a shirt and top that fits well on me BUT the skirt...” and I turn around and show her my exposed ass cheeks peeking underneath.

“oh dear, thats definately not in regulation! Ok so you need a longer skirt? like... another 6 inches?” she said as she takes out a measuring tape from her purse.

“um yea, if thats doable”

“it is but we won’t have that ready until the 1st day of classes, so I guess for now, try on the pants and see if any of those fit”

Great. I’m going into a new school, misgendered and foreign passing. 2 of the pants in the clothes bag fit well....too well. We said our good byes and I had at least 2 sets of uniforms ready until I get a proper pair. No matter, at least my ass won’t be hanging out at school. I go school supply shopping and came upon the holy grail of stationary, SCENTED PAPER AND GLITTER PENS. Of course in the pastel rainbow colors and matching lead pencils. I get a whole matching set along with a backpack, water bottle and coffee tumbler. I was going to soon regret that matching set (more on that later) but I was just SO happy that I was pink, pretty and sparkly.

-Fast forward to the 1st day-

I was in a much better mood because the sun was out, the coffee smelled particularly good, I made myself look cute but toned down for a good 1st day impression. I grab my keys and think I think I’m forgeting one detail? What could it be? and I thought Oh! I need to text my parents that I’m happy and I’m going to school now! I am noticably happy that the nice front desk lady of my housing noticed and wished me luck on my 1st day. I get in my car and I have 1 hour to get to school but its only a 8 minute drive and I wanted to circle to find parking and see where the entrance is so I can teleport from wherever I parked. I pass the gates before seeing the parking and I think oh cool its just right there! but Ill still teleport in the front. I park and I don’t even get out of my car, I just hug my backpack and teleport in front of the gates. I start walking toward the gates and try to not smile like an idiot but I start to notice all the looks and stares. And I think oh they just don’t recongize me because I look foreign or didn’t see me at the entrance exams. As a enter the 1st year doors I hear

‘yo you see that guy? he looks as pretty as a girl! Guess his favorite color is baby pink? Are they wearing eyeliner? I wonder how long is his hair? That bun is tastful, no homo tho!’

I FORGOT THAT PANTS ARE THE BOY’S UNIFORM AND MY SKIRTS ARE STILL BEING TAILORED! I socially already fucked up, guess I won’t be making friends anytime soon. But I guess I’m glad they think I’m a pretty girl in the boy’s uniform? I walk up to the table at the furthest hall on the right that says International Student Check In thats me. I get greeted by a man with a boombox looking thing on their neck, black pants and jacket, small triangle sunnies and yellow hair.

“HEEYYY welcome to UA!”

“oh thank you! I am Itati Palma, American student”

“okay lets see, palma palma paruma AH found you! OH YOURE THAT JAZZY SAX GIRL THAT TURNED HERO!”

oh jeez who put that on my record?! “hehehe yea thats me”

“coolio jazzy girl! Heres your schedule, pins and a note from Midnight”

“pins?”

“yeeeaahh! pins to put on your uniform to let other students and staff where youre from and get to know you better!”

I open the small manila pouch into my hand and two pins fall into my palm, the American and Mexican flag. I look at them and tried not to cry, I missed my home and chill life in Cali.

“hey hey! your classes are on the 3 hall on the right, door all the way down.”

“oh right!” that snapped me out of my sentiment, “thank you again! Mr?”

“they call me Mic sensei”

“Mic? ok thanks!”

I walk quickly to my classroom, I get to the outside of the door and think welp, heres to 3 years of being called pretty boy and other dumb shit. I open the door and I see 9 desks and 5 people already there. Oh jeez, what a small class size but at least nobody is staring at me. I sit in the middle seat, though I prefer the front desk but they were already claimed! Guess classroom culture is different here too. In front of me was a boy to what I thought was a Japanese native until they turned and I caught a glimpse of their pin, they’re Korean! They noticed my pins too and had a confused look as they gave me a once over.

“You’re an...american? and mexican? You traveled quite a ways”

“um yeah hehe, I am Itati Palma by the way!”

“hmm, nice to meet you Palma-san, I’m Jin Matsui”

“nice to meet you too!”

Before I could ask them where in Korea are they from, the door slammed open. A tall and muscular white-blonde girl walked in, I tried so hard not to stare at them but they looked so tough and wondered if that’s part of their quirk. She sat behind me and Jin and I turned around to get a better look at them. I saw their pins, the Russian and Japanese flag, shes also a foreign student. She looked up with a death stare at me and Jin but then her eyes widened and she smiled.

“ah! fellow foreigners! Hello!” she spoke in a predominate Russian accent that matches so well with her image.

“um yeah! Hello, I’m Itati Palma”

“Hi, and I’m Jin Matsui”

“Palma-san and Matsui-san?Milana Mikhalia Oleshin, very nice to meet you!”

Oh my! A long and hard to pronounce name, I guess we aren’t at nickname or first name basis yet for everything to go smoother. I turn to my bag because I got a text, its my parents!

[Hola mija! Que bien que estas feliz hoy! Te amo y ponde bien en tus studias, dios te bendiga.]

Oh mom, you have no idea how bad I had it earlier. I look around and see everyone has nice, canvas school bags and I have my baby pink one with a puppy on it. And everyone had normal stationary and you can smell and see mine from across the hall. Oof, what I’d give to redo today. I look at my schedule and see that I have a short school day this semester.

Palma, Itati (F) (International) Intelligence Core Program [1-A]

Homeroom......9a-10am..........................................Intelligence Wing, room 1-A

Weaponery.......10:15am-11:50am.........................................Gym

Hero Course [Ethics and Laws].....12p-1:15p...........Hero Wing, room 1-A

Free Period.........2:50p-3:30p.......................................TBA

Intelligence Course[Statistics&Strategy]3:45p-4:40p..Intelligence Wing,room 3-A

Seems like a reasonable schedule, better than America. I didn’t know that Oleshin-san was peeking over my shoulder to read my schedule.

“YOURE THE GIRL THAT TESTED OUT OF GENERAL STUDIES?!”

I jumped in my seat “um yea?”

“I heard about you! The staff and school district are boasting that they got the potentially genius level international students. They said that theres 2 of them here at UA and they are jumping straight into course work! One has placed college level English and 3rd year Level Strategtic Thinking! And thats you!”

Jin turns around, looking bootytickled “erm, what? Let me see your schedule.”

He scans and compares it to his “well theres proof that you are one of those students, but then again, so am I”

I take a look at his, almost identical except they’re not taking the hero course, but second year english. What a weird turn of events that I’d be in the same class as other international students in the same school arrangments? I guess they’re my friends now.

A clean cut man in a blue jumpsuit with multiple patches on the arms opens the door. I just knew they were our teacher, it shows that he’s been through it all and has wisdom to bestow upon us.

“Hello, good morning students, if you could all take your seats so I can get things started”

Everyone fell into place and was attentive.

“Welcome to the Intelligence Program, You can call me Diya sensei, I’m a retired secret service of Japan better known as Agent 99 code name ‘Space Cowboy’”

I tried so hard not to laugh at that code name, I wondered why he was called that. Maybe his quirk?

“Now to take roll, say present when I say your name”

He finished roll and said “huh, 3 international students? I expect impeccable work from you three. I won’t slow down for you”

I somehow wasn’t scared of that statement. Before moving on to explaining the coursework and lessons, a lizard bolted from the window and to Diya sensei. He let out one of the most high pitched yelps and retreated to the corner. How can a man so sharp and decorated, be reduced to a crying mess over a lizard? Matsui-san captures the fast lizard and wraps it in his gym towel to take outside after homeroom. Sensei regains his composure and continues class like nothing happened. After homeroom, we all had weaponery but we didn’t get to use any gear or weapons yet. Instead we got measured for our jumpsuits and PE clothes plus got settled in the locker rooms. To my surprise it was co-ed locker rooms since it was a small class size and only 3 girls. Everyone was respectful of eachother’s bodies and privacy. Next I was supposed to go to the ethics class but in Midnight’s note, she said that I start that class on Wednesday so for the time being, I have to report to the staff room to meet with them. I go to the staff room and on the way I see a class doing drills with quirks outside, it looked fun and everyone looked so focused. I get to the staff room and Midnight hands me my tailored skirts and 3rd set of uniform. I also got to know the other teachers and staff including the principal, a big ass fuckin rat. I was about to punt that bitch when they opened the door if they didn’t start talking. Other than that, it was a nice time and then there was lunch. I walked in the cafeteria and saw the long ass lines and said ‘fuck that’, so I teleported to my car and ate my packed food in there. Next was my free period, Midnight said that it was alright for me to wander around campus so I can get to know the place better so I can teleport from class to class. I wander around without my bag, just my phone and schedule with school map folded in my pocket. I go to the hero wing to find the 1-A room, nobody was in there, maybe its gym time for them? I pass by a group of 3 upper classmen, A boy with black hair and pointy ears, a taller boy with lemon colored hair and a girl with long sky blue hair. They all looked at me as I passed by and I felt intimidated because they have a strong presence to them but I didn’t know why or how. I hid behind the corner and heard them talking about me,

“did you see that? I made accidental eye contact and I think I’m going to be sick”

“hmm, do you think thats the international student Mirio? They had an american flag pin”

“Maybe? Theres no description of them other than they’re American and a 1st year in the Intelligence program”

“wait, sceret service? I thought they saved their school from a gang by disabling the leader? Why are we interested in her again Mirio?”

“She’s a true hero Amajiki! We could learn alot from her and maybe change their mind to be a hero, like they were meant to be”

What the heck was that Lemon boy going off about? A hero? Change my mind? Learn from me? I turned the corner to tell them off but they were gone and I wasn’t about to go looking for them. I wander some more and the bell rings and a swarm of students come out of their classrooms, I couldn’t naviagate around and I think, guess Ill teleport, BUT THEN I COULDN’T! Like when I was acting up back home and my mom would use her erasure quirk on me to prevent me from escaping. But my mom couldn’t be here!? Then what the fuck is going on? Then a man’s voice from behind me spoke,

“are you lost young lady?”

I turn around and I’m shaking in fear before I even see this mystery man. I see him and he’s a tall, dark long haired with eye bags. I knew right away he was the one who erased my quirk, his eyes glowed the same way my mom did when she activated her quirk. Mom i thought and how much I missed her and I couldn’t hold back my tears this time. I cried in front of this man I just met. He arched his brow then gazed his eyes on my flag pins. He gasped and deactivated his quirk.

“oh no I’m sorry Miss! I didn’t mean to scare you to tears, are you alright?”

I stammered “um uhhhh -sniff- I’m, I’m ok! um I’ll just leave”

“no please, let me escort you to your next class, I feel terrible for making you cry. Especially on the 1st day”

I felt sort of better when he offered, I let him walk with me.

“you didn’t scare me, I cried because you and my mother have the same quirk and looking at your glowing eyes reminded me of her and how much I miss her”

“oh! same quirk you say? Were you a trouble maker?”

“nah, I would try to teleport away when it was time to do housework when I was younger and she’d disable my quirks so I couldn’t escape and HAD to do chores”

He laughed “what a woman! Say, your not from around here huh?”

“nope, I’m from America with hispanic roots”

“OH! you’re an ethnic American! That’s why you have two flags.”

“yup, I got here about a week ago and settled about 3 days ago”

“yeah, Midnight told me about you. You’re a very unique indivdual, how are your classes so far?”

“nothing interesting yet”

“well hopefully things pickup soon, oh i think this is your wing”

“um oh yea it is, thank you for walking me over, Mr?”

“Mr Aizawa, or better known as Eraserhead”

“Eraserhead? um ok thanks again!”

“no problem, see you wednesday”

“wednesday?”

“yea, I’m the Hero Course ethics teacher. See you then!”

Then this man deadass walks away after dropping that bomb on me? What a legend, can’t wait to sit in his class. My last class was more up my alley and the upperclassmen were so nice that I didn’t feel any different from them. I walked to my car to reflect on all the shit that happened today and what I am going to do to make school bearable. The drive to my place was pleasant but I saw a bunch of students walking together like they just became friends and wanted to spend more time together. I felt a little lonely when I got home, I remembered when I was in america and I would talk to my friends after school and how they’d wait for me after band practice to hang out. I took off my uniform and hanged up my new ones and had one really good cry. I haven’t cried that hard in months and it was much needed for my mental health. I washed up and ate and tried to just forget all the dumb shit of the day when I laid down to sleep.

-fast foward to Wednesday-

“hey Palma-san! did you do the online homework for stats and strats?”

“yee, did you?” I said knowing damn well what Matsui-san was going to say.

“psh! course I did, I was just making sure you did it so you might have something to do during free period”

“HEY! T-posing through the halls IS a viable thing to do! I was studying where everthing is on campus for future use”

“IS NOT WHEN YOU LEVITATE AND SCREECH IN THE BOYS BATHROOM WHILE I’M IN THERE!”

Before I could retort back, Oleshin-san butted in,

“aye Palma-san, you excited for your hero course class?”

“oof yee, the teacher is kinda hot”

“I SAW and I’m jealous! You have to tell me if the boys in that class are hot too!”

“ugh, don’t you two have better things to talk about than butts and boys?”

“I’m so excited tho! To meet anybody thats outside our program and learning new things?! I just hope they like me, I even made them cookies”

“Palma-san nani the heck!? I want a cookie”

“You guys can get a cookie during lunch if theres any leftovers”

I quickly change after weapons class and bolt to the hero wing. I walk down the hall and I’m really feeling nervous! I look at my coffee tumbler and felt calmer as I took a sip. Ok Ita, you can do this, no chickening out now I psych myself up as I stand in front of the door. I open the door, expecting everyone to be strewn about and talking...nope. I walk in and everyone is in their seats and sensei was standing up in the front and I disrupted them. Everyone was staring and I instantly get flushed and I check to make sure I was in the right classroom and said,

“did I fuck up?”

“no actually I was just talking about you, perfect timing!” said Aizawa with a smile. “why don’t you come up and introduce yourself?”

“um ok” I said as I scanned the room. I got up to the front, chugged down my coffee for dominance, did a quick spin for drama and put on my ‘I swear I slept a normal amount of sleep last night’ face.

“Hi hello~ My name is Itati Palma and I’m from America! The reason I don’t look like one is because my ethnic background is hispanic, or in other words, both of my parents are from Mexico but I was born in America. My quirk isn’t the strongest or the most useful BUT I can be of better help in other parts of combat, so please, we don’t have to be friends but lets all work hard together” I bow respectfully and turn to sensei.

“nice speech kid, you can take the seat on the third row”

“um ok thanks”

As I’m walking toward my seat, sensei walks out saying he’ll be right back with more handouts. I sit and I feel all eyes on me, giving me the once over. The person in front of me has a bird head but normal human body from the neck down, the person behind me has half their face covered with multiple limbs and the person on my left has red spiky hair and was staring REALLY hard at me. I almost didn’t want to look at them until sensei came back, I just sat there blushing really hard.

“Kirishima! stop staring at her! Can’t you see you’re making her uncomfortable?!” said the boy with glasses making chopping motions.

“Oh sorry! Its just that I’ve never seen curly hair of that type in person, you have really nice hair and your backpack is cute”

“um thank you, I feel sorta out of place with it tho, everyone else has normal bags”

“tch, makes you look like a little girl” muttered the boy with the blonde hair.

“Kacchan thats so rude! I think their choice of bag is cute and different in a good way” said some broccoil looking ass.

“well um, not to change the subject, but I made you guys cookies! I got up extra early to bake them”

“Cookies?! oh how sweet of you!” joked the pink girl.

“Oh here, let me help you with that” said the boy with glasses as he stood up.

“oh no I got this” I take out a package of colorful napkins and the box of cookies and I toss the napkins up and activate my quirk to pass out the napkins. Then I opened the box and gave everyone a cookie and gave sensei 3.

“so cool! you passed out the treat without getting up!” squealed what I assume to be the invisible girl.

“THESE COOKIES ARE SOOO YUMMY TOO!” proclaimed the boy with a black streak in their yellow hair.

Everyone was in a better mood and I got compliments for my cookies, I was in my happy place. After class, as I was packing my bag, the boy with the glasses came up to my desk

“thank you for the cookie, Palma-san, you really know how to bring a crowd together”

“oh thank you, uhhhhh”

“hm? OH my name is Tenya Iida, sorry I forgot to introduce myself earlier”

“Iida-san? oh its alright, its nice to meet you”

“I haven’t seen you around halls, sensei tells us your in a different program? Is it true?”

“Yes its true, also the school is kinda big and I can be easy to miss in a crowd because I’m so short”

“I see, well its lunch time! May I walk you to the lunch room?”

“oh thank you but I usually eat in the parking lot” I soon regreted my words because this square faced, glasses wearing ass gasped and grabbed me by the wrist followed by dragging me down the hall.

“You’ve been by yourself during such social time?! Now I have a better reason to bring you to the lunch group!”

“eating by yourself isn’t a huge deal” I say but looking back, thats all I’ve been doing.

“A true hero never lets a fellow classmate eat alone!”

I get aggitated and retort “well what if they want to be alone!” as I teleport out of his grip and 3 feet behind him. He sees the whole thing and stopped on the dime, he was shocked.

“you, you used your quirk to escape my grip? What is your quirk exactly?”

“Heck, um its Mid-range Telekinesis, I can levitate, levitate others and objects and teleport about 2 miles at a time.”

“thats incredible power! what do you mean your quirk isn’t strong or useful?! You’re gifted in so many ways!”

I wasn’t having fun anymore, he wasn’t letting me talk or left me alone when I said I wanted to.

“please stop”

“hmm? stop what”

“stop, talking about my quirk like I’m some sort of show horse”

“Show horse? no no no! I didn’t mean to-”

“STOP!” I didn’t want to hear it, I just wanted to hide. Tears were welling up in my eyes.

“what is going on here? Tenya, what are doing to that poor girl?” it was Midnight. “oh no, are you ok Itati?” and I start to cry when she made eye contact with me.

“its ok, you’re ok! please don’t feel sad” she comforted me as she held me, “why don’t you go to lunch Tenya, I’ll take care of things here”

“but I- I mean-”

“please, she’s been through too much already”

He walked away, looking back every few steps. Midnight escorted me to the staff room so I can calm down a bit and talk about what happened.

“You want to talk about it?” she asked me softly.

“yea, the school culture is too much for me”

“how so? Are you not making friends? Are the classes too hard?”

“its mostly the students outside of my program, they’re too into their hero agenda to be the best that they aren’t considering other’s personal feelings or perfernces”

I then tell her about the 3 upper classmen that talked about me and what Iida told me as they dragged me down the hall.

“oh I see now, it almost feels like you’re being targeted and pressured.”

“yeah, I want to learn about this hero culture more but this is too much at once. It’s strange because back home, I was so used to be part of the crowd and stand out when I wanted to. And here it feels like I breathe a little too loud and I’m suddenly getting looks”

“ok, I’m glad you aren’t giving up. But if they start getting physical and racist, please let any of the staff know.”

“alright, Thank you Midnight! I don’t know what I’d do without you”

I go about my day and tell Matsui and Oleshin what happened after school. They weren’t too keen about it,

“That glasses wearing asshole!”

“yea not good on a future hero if you tell me”

“We got your back Palma-san”

“YEAH! we international students have to stick together, its scary being alone”

“yea Matusi-san is right. If any of those hero asses try any of us, I’ll flex on them and toss them in the trash!” Oleshin-san said as she flexed her strong arms.

“And I can portal us to safety or anywhere really” Matsui-san said as he jumped.

“oh guys! I’m gonna cry again!” I said because I was so touched by their words.

“and I’ll T-pose, screech and rise on them. Maybe levitate them in the trash too”

We all laugh as we flex and T-pose together in the school parking lot. They walked me to my car. We were about to part ways to head home when I said

“hey, um you guys can call me Ita, if you want”

“Ita? then you can call me Jin”

“oh we doing short hand! then you can call me Mimi”

“Jin and Mimi huh? ok! see you guys tomorrow”

“bye!”

“until tomorrow”

As I drove home, I thought Holy shit I just made friends.

-End Chapter 1-

#bnha #mha #self insert au #chapter 1 #not canon #will update regularly #ask me anything

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youhearstatic · 6 years ago

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Sandworms and Other Concerns - Barry discovers that Lup's presence can improve any situation, including having his arm torn off by a fifty-foot-long, carnivorous, burrowing, acid-spitting, hook-toothed, pinstriped Sandworm. (By @tanger-catnip & @youhearstatic - Also on AO3.)

Lup blinked. Once, then twice. At first, she didn't know what had woken her up. The ship was perfectly still, aside from the faint thrum of the bond engine that she'd learned how to tune out decades ago. The interior lighting that simulated a day-night cycle was dimmed as low as it went which meant it was still 'nighttime.'

After a moment, Lup realised what it was. The steady pattern of breathing that lulled her into sleep was coming at its normal pace. Barry was awake.

Lup braced herself with one arm and lifted her head. Her pale blue eyes shone like lanterns, a side effect of her darkvision.

It was all in shades of grey, but she could see the whole room. The dresser with its drawers left open, the closet door with the two sets of robes hanging from hooks, the bookcase stuffed full to bursting, and her bra on the floor next to a pair of durable denim jeans.

"Hey," Lup murmured, once her ethereal gaze settled on the object of her interest. She moved the arm slung over Barry's middle and reached up to touch his cheek.

Lup licked her lips. They were painfully dry, on the verge of cracking. Gods, she hated the desert. It had been picturesque for about ten minutes before the Starblaster crew had realised there was nothing else to this plane besides sand, sand, and more sand.

The hand on Barry's cheek moved to his shoulder, careful to not touch the joint where his arm should have been connected. Lup was trying her hardest not to stare. She knew he was self-conscious about it and she could only sympathise.

Being grievously injured early in a cycle was almost worse than death. The pain hurt almost as much as having to deal with the steep reduction of your abilities. In this case, Barry's had lost his whole right arm, making even routine tasks like eating and writing that much more difficult.

Sometimes, when Lup shut her eyes, she still saw flashes of that horrible moment when the cartilage in his shoulder gave out, and his skin tore open.

"I'm going to fucking kill that sandworm, slit it open, and take your arm back," Lup growled under her breath. "I don't care if it's mostly bones by now."

Barry shifted awkwardly. He was still not fully adjusted to leveraging his body with one less limb. After a low grunt of pain, he gave up the effort. With two arms he could have tilted himself towards Lup without disturbing the snuggling that much, but until he got a lot more used to things, everything would be a huge production.

"I'd rather your bones didn't join them," he said. He bent his head to where her hand rested on his shoulder, rubbed his cheek against her fingers. "Pretty sure your fireball made my... uh, made it taste charbroiled anyway."

Lup cracked half a grin and a short snicker. Then her eyes narrowed as she looked Barry over closely, searching for any signs of discomfort. Something had to have woken him up.

"Do you need more painkillers?" She asked.

Barry went quiet, his thoughts drifting back where they'd been before she woke. Ever since the dull ache turned to a persistent roar, he'd been considering the meds. Merle had reminded him he needed to stay ahead of the pain. 'If you let it get out of hand - ha! - it's hard to catch back up. Then I gotta blow another high-level spell keeping your ass upright,' the cleric had told him. Merle had already done a lot of patching up when the three of them returned from that disastrous scouting mission.

On the other hand - ugh - the meds made him muddle-headed, and he was already down a considerable amount of usefulness.

"No painkillers yet," he told her. "I can't think with them."

Lup frowned. "It's the middle of the night? Why do you need to think?"

Lup wasn't going to push him on it though. She had a feeling if the roles were reversed, she'd be just as stubborn about taking her medication. Not being fully present when they were counting down days till the apocalypse was a tough pill to swallow.

Barry focused on her, squinting to make out details on her face in the dark. "What about you? Are you doing okay?"

The sand worm's teeth had gotten him, but only after it's mate had been split open by Magnus's axe. Both Lup and Magnus were coated in its caustic blood. Mags's chest armour had taken the brunt of it, but they were both freckled in nasty-looking, coin-sized burns.

Lup sighed and moved to kiss him. His lips were dried out from the heat like her own, but she hardly noticed.

"I'm fine, Cuddle Muffin. I've burned myself worse making pancakes."

That wasn't strictly true, the pancake incident hadn't gotten her in places covered by clothing like the acid, but the overall coverage was similar.

Now that she'd confirmed everything was alright, or at least was how she'd left it, Lup dropped down and nestled back into her preferred spot under Barry's remaining arm. She hugged him tightly around his middle, unspeakably glad to have him around to hold. It'd been touch and go for a few terrifying seconds. If Magnus's grip had faltered, or her fireball had missed, the worm would've dragged Barry under and ripped him to shreds.

"I hate it when you do that. You've had your arm torn off and you're worried about me? Like, seriously?" Lup thought that she'd worked out all her feelings on this, but they kept coming back. "Just, let me take care of you for once, okay?"

"You do take care of me." Barry squeezed her gently. "All the time," he promised.

They went quiet for a moment. Barry listened to her breathing beside him. The feel of her arms around him helped take his mind off his right side.

"Did I ever tell you I broke my arm when I was a kid? Three places. Had one of those casts that makes you look like a kid's stick drawing with the arm jutting out straight. At least now I'm not banging it on stuff, I guess," he added with a huff of laughter. "I probably told you already, didn't I?" The passage of time since he lost his arm was hard to parse. He'd probably told her the same story three times.

Try as he might. Barry couldn't stop coming back to that sickening noise right after Magnus had grabbed him and before Lup had started screaming. Afterwards, Lup and Magnus had taken one look at him and gone completely pale.

Gods, that noise. Everything else was a blur, but that noise stayed in his head.

Barry was both tired but not, and the clarity felt worth holding on to. Being out of it was worse than anything. He'd woken up at one point and thought it was all a dream. His arm was fine, but he'd never been on the Starblaster. No Hunger, but no Lup. Maybe he hadn't woken up. He's not sure. He didn't like having his thoughts messed with.

"Sorry," he said with another light squeeze. "Go back to sleep."

Lup didn't want to sleep, she wanted to stay up and listen to him ramble about anything and everything. If it were possible, she'd wrap herself up in his voice like a warm fuzzy blanket.

But, it did sound a little scratchier than it should.

"Not yet. You should have something to drink," Lup decided.

Lup paused to snuggle into his side and hug him tightly. Making up for the moments she would be gone in advance.

Then she slipped out of bed. Taako and her could move like quicksilver when they wanted (old talents from travelling shows they'd worked) and the mattress barely moved to mark her departure. She went to the door and opened it just wide enough to slide through.

Lup wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing, but it was late enough she doubted that anyone else would be up to spot her and give her shit for it.

Once in the kitchen, Lup found a heavy cast-iron kettle and filled it with water. She took a pass on the stove and held the kettle over her open palm as she summoned a handful of flame. The flames licked the pure black metal, heating the water to boiling in minutes.

Lup rested it on the stove and went to go find the herbal tea. Davenport kept a stash of chamomile and lemon for when his headaches got bad. She filled up an infuser with two spoonfuls of dry leaves and shoved it in the pot.

The only part of this process she couldn't rush though was the brewing. So Lup tapped her fingers on her thigh and started to count to 300 in her head.

She gave up around 240 and poured out the tea into a large mug with the phrase 'I make horrible chemistry puns, but only periodically' on the side. Next, she dumped in four teaspoons of sugar, stirred it up, and cast Ray of Frost to cool it down to just the right temperature.

Lup carried the mug in both hands, moving slower, so she didn't spill. She nudged open the door to what used to be Barry's room but was now their shared one. She placed the mug down on the bedside table and flitted up to the bed again. Settling with her legs on either side of his hips. She helped him sit up. Shifting positions stirred up the roar in Barry's arm or lack of an arm or wherever... but how could he complain with a naked elf beside him bearing warm tea?

Lup collected the mug and pressed it into his fingers but kept her grip on both the mug and his hand. The last thing Barry needed right now was to have hot water spilt all over his chest.

Barry couldn't have stopped the smile if he wanted to. Lup helped him with the mug, and he drank. It was sweet, the way he liked it, and the sugary warmth of tea and knowing she had put such care into preparing it pushed away some of that persistent tug of pain.

After a few sips, she sat back to look at him. Probably trying to figure out what else he needed, he realised.

"Hey," he told her. "Did I ever tell you..." he hesitated and went for a joke instead. "...that I broke my arm when I was a kid?"

He waited for a beat then smiles. "Kidding." He leans forward, tilting his neck so he can kiss her forehead.

Lup fell right into his trap. Silly of her, but she'd had her guard down. She laughed, high and soft like the rustle of wind chimes.

Barry sat back and continued, "I was going to say: did I ever tell you that you're better than pain meds?"

Lup shifted and tilted her head to one side. "You sure it's me and not my tits?" she asked with a grin. She moved her shoulders back, showing off her chest. There wasn't that much to show, but she was damn proud of them.

"I'm sure they're a contributing factor," Barry admitted, giving Lup the long, appreciative look she always deserved. "But I really did just mean how you take care of me."

Lup dropped the posture and nudged a little closer to him. "If I'm better, then I shouldn't leave your side until you get your arm back, right?" She smiled wolfishly and tapped him lightly on the tip of his nose. "I bet you'd get sick of me eventually. You're going to deny it, you huge sap, but 24/7 Lup for a whole year is a lot to handle, even Taako gets breaks."

Barry shook his head slowly, to not disturb his shoulder. "Sap that I am, I'll deny the impossible. I'll never get sick of you, of this, of us. I signed up for the long haul." He made a face. "Though currently, you'll have to trust me on the signature."

He ran his hand over her knee to her thigh. His thumb edged around one of the circular burns. "I'd like to threaten the cause of these, but it's already dead, and I'm not sure my left armed punching would pose much threat."

Lup bit down on her bottom lip. Like most burns, they were still hot to the touch, even ages after the incident. They would probably scar over. She might have cared about that before, but thanks to the regen cycle any change to her appearance, positive or negative, was only transitory.

"I guess I'm gonna have to work on offhand casting, huh?" Barry mused. "And offhand writing and eating and everything else."

"I'll practice with you," Lup offered. "Then you can't trick yourself into thinking you suck at it, because I'll suck with you, and we can add being ambidextrous to our list of kickass skills. Something tells me this'll not be the last time someone loses an arm."

"True," Barry agreed. "Probably should have worked on it before, huh?"

Lup shrugged and said. "Before? Later? Our timeline is so fucked up, does it even matter?"

Barry was lost in thought for a moment. "I bet Lucretia can cast with both hands equally." His eyebrows pulled together in concentration. "But she usually uses both together. I wonder if there's a left brain/right brain component to casting? Maybe I should try offhand with and without a wand, too. Maybe a wand would..."

Barry reached his left arm to scratch the opposite side then stopped. "Dammit. Phantom itching. I read cases of that but..." He dropped his hand to his lap. Lup wanted to try getting it for him as if she might have more luck

"Maybe Magnus can carve an arm for me," Barry thought out loud.

"Wood is kinda heavy, Blueberry. You'd might as well tape a stick to your arm... unless."

Lup grew quiet, taking her turn to get lost in thought.

"Never mind. We have plenty of time to sort shit out. If anyone can figure out how to jury-rig a prosthetic arm while stranded in a planet-sized desert, it's us."

Lup glanced around her, remembering where they were. "Crap, I should have helped you lay down already." She vacated his lap and helped him settle back down in bed, adjusting the pillows to compensate.

"Babe, do you ever feel like..." Lup trailed off and shook her head. Better not. He was injured and tired. "Do you want those painkillers now?"

Barry looked over at the medicine container and made a face. "I guess I'd better before it really gets going. Half dose maybe? I hate to waste them. Someone else might need them before this cycle is over."

He let her get the meds and the tea. He wanted to see how much he could do on his own, but then she'd just have to help him up and get him back settled in bed again. His balance was still tough to negotiate. He'd slipped and knocked the still raw joint yesterday and had no desire to experience that again.

It was bad enough just to look at. He was ready for the stage where he could pin up the sleeve and not have to see it so much. But Merle had recommended leaving everything but the sutures uncovered. They needed to keep a close eye out for blood poisoning or infection since they didn't have a lot of information on sandworms. The sum of what they had learned was: bites, has caustic blood, resistant to fire damage, and susceptible to axe.

Lup carefully shook out a pair of pills from the bottle. It had originally contained 500 capsules and was still about 3/4th full. She dropped the second pill back in anyway and placed the remaining one into the palm of Barry's hand.

She let him take it on his own, waiting till he had it in his mouth before pressing the mug to his lips. He swallowed, which was maybe more difficult since she had laid him down before giving him the pills, fantastic planning Lup, Bt-dubs.

She distracted herself by readjusting the bedding. She'd arranged a pillow to help support the right side of Barry's body. Lup edged it back into place and tucked the blanket over it.

"Hey," Barry said, patting the space on the bed beside him, "Come here and finish that thought you had before?"

Lup looked up then over to the spot where she probably should have been. She nodded and checked everything was fine one last time before rounding the bed and hopping up. She was too awake to lie down, so she crossed her legs and pulled his left arm into her lap. She played with his hand, rubbing his fingers with her thumbs and gingerly tugging on them before letting go.

Barry watched her. These sorts of moments were his favourite. Watching her close and quiet while she lined up thoughts to share with him. The way she touched him when she was distracted and the way it soothed them both.

"It's not important; you should be resting right now," Lup protested. Having her brain directly connected to her mouth was helpful for witty comebacks, but it did get her into more uncomfortable conversations than she would have liked. Particularly with Barry, who paid her such close attention that no offhand comment would escape his notice.

But she knew the more she denied telling him, the more interested he would get. It was too late to take it back now.

"Okay, fine. The other day I remembered something. Y'know when we were stargazing that time, and my head was on your tummy, and it made that funny gurgling nose? You turned all red, and then I said it sounded like you had eaten a dinosaur, and then I tickled you until you promise not to eat any more extinct creatures?"

It was funnier to think about than to say out loud, mostly because Lup could still picture the abject horror on Barry's face before he realised she found it funny.

"Oh, no, not the dinosaur," he said with a quiet chuckle. It's been years, and his face still went red thinking about that. But with Lup, he had learned about a kind of embarrassment he hadn't known existed. One that was sweet - fond even - because it was something shared. Embarrassment probably wasn't the right word for it, though. Or maybe it was the right word, and the one he'd felt before was ashamed.

"Ha, yeah. But uh, that doesn't matter," Lup continued. "It's just I had that pinned in year 43, but like, two hours later I realised that it couldn't be because Legato was 47. The more I think about it, the more I see that I have no idea what order a lot of my favorite shit actually happened in."

Lup sighed and stopped fidgeting with his hand, settling for just holding it.

"Fifteen years... that's how long we've been, right? This is sixteen? It either feels like a few months or an eternity. Never like a decade and a half."

Barry squeezed his fingers around the hand beneath his. "I know what you mean. There have been a few times I've thought about asking Lucretia to figure out when something happened, but I never do. But, I sort of like that so many, uh, so many of my favourite memories aren't moments in the timeline anymore."

Barry hesitated a moment, considering his words. "They're, uh, like books I've reread so many times that I can't remember not knowing the story." He felt his cheeks going red again, knew he was being sappy but pushed on. "I just know how they make me feel," he finished, squeezing her hand again.

He rubbed his thumb along the edge of her palm. "But then, I don't know about elf lives. For a human, though, I've lost all perspective on time."

"See, that's the thing! This shouldn't be that long for me, right? But I don't... I didn't have this much stuff I wanted to hold onto before," Lup admitted. "Taako and I had our moments, obviously, but there was so much bad mixed in with the good, it was easier to just let it all go. Taako would still be there when I woke up the next day, and he was the only thing worth holding on to, so I didn't think it mattered... But, BJ, like about age 100 to 175? All of that is just a blur. I couldn't tell you anything about that if I tried. We were kids, then we were in college, then the institute, then this..."

Lup brought Barry's hand up to her face and pressed a kiss to his knuckles.

"I tried to talk to Taako about it, but I think he'd still operating on the level I used to. He's letting it wash over him, and I'm just down here trying to catch water with my hands, and I..."

Lup shook her head. She bit down very softly on the side of Barry's pointer finger. Honestly forgetting that it was his hand and not hers as she tried to sift through her thoughts.

"If we were on normal time, you'd be... It would be half over by now. I don't have enough memories of us for it to be half over."

Lup looked down and noticed the faint pink mark her fangs left on Barry's finger. "Aw, fuck. Sorry babe. You know I get bitey when I'm anxious, but you've had more than enough teeth for one cycle."

Barry laughed. "Lup, if having your teeth on me was a problem it would have come up before now."

"-And I could never have enough memories of us. I mean, I don't want us running forever but..." It was impossible to think of what it might be like when time found them again.

"I know what you mean about trying to catch it all," he said, switching back to the other part of her topic. "Does Taako not...?" Barry stopped and considered the thought. "I really hate thinking of him... not having moments he wants to hold onto."

The more Barry thought about it, the more obvious it seemed. He suddenly wanted to go pull Taako out of bed and drag him out to the deck, get him to make up obscene constellations or work on a convoluted prank to pull on Magnus. But you can't force those moments. Like this one, even in the middle of living it, he already knew it was a favourite. Spun out of nothing but being awake at the same late-early hour.

It reminded him of how lucky he was. He'd woken up in pain, struggling with back and forth thoughts of how it should be dealt with. But even without medicine in his system yet, the pain was background noise for how grateful and lucky he felt to be with her.

"I'm glad you have more good memories than you can hold onto," he whispered. Dammit, he wanted to wrap her in his arms. "Miniature hug," he told her and closed his fingers around her wrist. He rubbed his thumb over her skin the way he'd rub his hands on her back.

Lup snickered and repeated "Miniature hug!" she took his remaining wrist in her hand and returned the squeeze. Then because she could, Lup flopped down, cuddled up to him, and tucked his arm around her hips like it was a blanket.

She groaned, just from the pure comfort of it all. She'd rather not have the actual blankets over her because of her acid burns, but Barry was better anyway.

"This is all your fault, you know," She muttered. "Before, I didn't know what I was missing. I thought I had everything I needed. Now I'm pissed the fuck off because some shitty worm deprived me of 5.3 percent of you."

"I'll accept that blame," Barry answered fondly.

Lup tucked beside him was wonderful. He'd never known anyone could be almost frustrated with an overabundance of contentment. But then, it wasn't something many people got to experience often, he thought.

He thought of them stargazing and his stomach interrupting the moment.

"But," he said and tapped his palm on her hip gently. "It's the worm's fault I'm half as handy. But now the worm can join the army. I don't have anything up my sleeve... Uh, there's probably something with 'will I ever play the piano again' but I'm blanking. I'd give my right arm to stop thinking of these," he finished apologetically.

Lup groaned, not out of contentment this time.

She held up a finger and pressed it to his lips. At first, it seemed like she wanted him to shut it, but then she proved that she'd only been buying herself more time to think.

"I think these puns are verging on self-harm. It might even be a cause for alarm. I'd hate to see you fall into an armpit of despair. If you don't stop soon, it could cost you an arm and a leg. Trying to avoid this is going to take some elbow grease."

Lup took a deep pull of breath and looked him dead in the eyes. "How does karma taste, cyan pants."

"Okay, you win, you win," he told her. "I'm glad you're on my side because you know Magnus and Merle will try to outdo themselves with those for the rest of the year."

Lup kissed him hard on the lips, then pulled back to whisper, "love you, you massive dork."

Barry decided that If karma tasted like Lup's kiss, he'd accept whatever it had in store.

He waited for her to settle back in place and tightened his arm around her. "I love you, Lup. You're the best, hands down."

Lup flinched. Anyone else in the multiverse and she would have come firing back, pun-guns blazing, but for Barry, she could let him have the last laugh.

She closed her eyes, hoping that if she pretended to sleep, he would join her.

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