#that one needs heavy work so whatever
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stuffeddeer · 1 year ago
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small insinuation of self harm
Dazai realizing he loves his s/o, telling them, and then wanting to tell the world ! He's very dramatic, so he repeats it religiously at the agency - a mantra that follows him everywhere :))
Until afterwards when he's alone in his apartment, heart beating out of his chest and feeling especially anxious. What's wrong with him? He didn't do anything differently today than he normally does...
He thinks hard as to what might be causing this, when the door opens and you step in. Oh, he's anxious about you.
But why? He loves you! He's quick to say it as you close and lock his door, and the feeling suddenly returns.
Oh.
He feels a sudden urge to break up with you, loosen contact, drive you away - Does he love you? He didn't want to tell anyone else (he did, he regrets it now). What happens if he falls out of love? Why did he do that? His chest just keeps squeezing, keeps constricting — feeling almost as though he was drowning in his thoughts. A moment of reprieve is granted only by the gentle placement of your hand over his heart.
"Are you alright?"
A few deep breaths and Dazai's heart rate is back in his control. Yes, he loves you, he thinks. But saying it is too scary.
Dazai just looks at you, a war tearing between his brain and his heart, unable to decide how to feel. His brain wants him to vanish: pack up and leave you forever so he doesn't have to deal with this vulnerability. His heart, however, wants to pull you closer. Never leave you, never let you out of his sight, always keep you within six feet of him to protect and love— and like you.
You pull his head onto your chest, cradling it in one hand as the other cards through his hair. "You can tell me anything, you know."
Dazai knows. But telling you he's not actually sure he loves you after his huge breakthrough what was merely the night before feels cruel.
It took a lot for him to open up and admit that, and he's not sure he can open up and admit that he regrets it. He should leave you - you deserve someone better, someone who can shout from the rooftops that you're theirs. But selfishly, he wants to hold you close and let you sooth him.
Seeing him still so torn, not moving as you hold him, causes a frown to come onto your face. All you want is for him to be happy and healthy and loved, and you'd thought you had a 66.67% success rate (you're working on the health thing). Like Dazai had moments prior, you wrack your brain for a change, and quickly land the same place he did: his love for you.
You smile softly, maybe a little sadly, and pull him closer until he's sitting on your lap. "Osamu," you press a kiss to the crown of his head.
He says nothing, just staring blankly. This is the hardest he's ever had to work to keep his heart in check, to stop the frantic beating. Is it hot in here? Should he take off his coat? Why can't he tell everyone he loves his partner? He does love them, he does.
How are you supposed to approach this? If you say you don't have to love me, he could go on the defensive. You just want him to relax. "I'd never force you to do something against your best interest."
Dazai meekly nods. Of course not. You always focus on him and his needs, emotionally and physically. You pack him lunches so he doesn't skip it at work and force him to eat dinners with you most nights. He just now notices the plastic takeout bag on the table - you must have brought that in when you first arrived. You want what's best for him, and he loves you for that! Doesn't he? Does he?
"I don't want you to force yourself into doing anything— saying anything you aren't ready for yet."
Dazai shuts his eyes tightly. Of course you figured it out. Feeling anxious, his heart beats desperately as he relinquishes control, not caring if you notice. Several soft apologies begin to fall from his lips quicker than you can stop them. The turmoil of this is eating him alive, and he hates it. Is running still an option? Does he even want to? The only thing keeping him from opening up new scars tonight is the feeling of your fingers in his hair. He's not sure if he'd leave even if you made him.
Fuck, but staying is so hard. His hands move up to tightly grip the fabric of your shirt, bunching it up between his fingers in hopes to ground himself.
You say nothing, allowing Dazai time to collect himself. Minutes pass, the food you brought likely cold now as Dazai just breathes in your embrace. A small growl from your stomach pulls him from his head finally, a small smile on his face as he looks up, seeing an embarrassed blush decorating your cheeks.
"Sorry, sorry!" Suddenly you're burying your head in Dazai's chest, seeking solace from your embarrassment. You trust him, love him enough to let him comfort you, just as he does you. A groan comes out of your mouth as your hands cover your face.
Dazai chuckles, pulling your head up before gently removing the hands covering your face. Your shoulders fall as Dazai's smile makes you relax. Whatever's bothering him won't go away over night, but you'll always be there to help.
"Come on, let's go eat," Dazai says, voice much calmer than it is when he's loudly boasting about his s/o at the agency. You don't mind. You like this version of Dazai all the same.
He loves you, he's sure of it. He just needs some time to properly accept it before yelling it from the rooftops - and you're more than happy to give him that time.
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solradguy · 4 months ago
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I thought the early 2000s "strong yet naked/mostly naked woman kept in her place by stronger, bigger, beast/monster or gang of racist caricatures" trope* was known by basically everyone but I mentioned it as a criticism of this older art book I'd flipped through recently to a friend and it turns out it isn't lol Maybe I've just read too many Heavy Metal issues... It used to be HORRIBLY inescapable in any sort of mature art scene back in the day lmao
*This trope is different from the pre-2000s one because the women usually look like they COULD fight back for at least a little bit whereas the previous trope had them be completely helpless damsels in distress
#textpost#And the damn apes. Why were there so many APES in art back then#I am so TIRED OF APES#'look at my drawing isn't it so quirky and funny. i have given the sassy stylized gorilla a naked human woman and sunglasses har har'#Ngl when the NFT thing started and I saw the ape one taking off it was instantly enemy number one because I am TIRED OF APES!!!#Not that every fictional or stylized ape is bad but there is a particular way they can be drawn where it makes me roll my eyes#Those NFTs are a prime example. They were absolutely drawing on the apes I loathe when designing those#I suppose these apes are parallel to that category of 'unintelligent and crude unkept representation of the reader/artist that still-#-hooks up with the smokin hot babe with the hourglass figure' trope#Which I also loathe#Probably this doesn't make any sense lol#I don't know how many of my followers on here shovel as much of this shit into their eyeballs as I do#Unfortunately sometimes the periodicals with such tropes that I so despise also occasionally have little gems between that make up for it#Wading through the Kevin Eastman+Simon Bisley Heavy Metal pissfart era for a scrap of Moebius or something avant garde#If I wasn't working on 1000 different things I would write reviews of Heavy Metal issues from my bookshelf lol#Some of these issues are ripe vomit. I could really tear into them#Insane that they went from cutting edge of adult SFF sequential art to whatever the fuck was going on in the FAKK 2 era#Ok I need to go get ready for bed lol enjoy whatever this post turned out to be
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icewindandboringhorror · 6 months ago
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finally finished all of one character's entire quests/optional dialogue/questions/etc.... 100,000 words... .... aughhh
#Given some of it IS lines of code and stuff but like.. minus all that it's still probably at least 85 - 95k words hhhhhh#AND I have to do this for another 3 characters. Then a few partial quests for 3 others. THEN the other random misc stuff in the game#(like there are public areas in the city like a park and a forest that you can go and do a few things at. and chat with a few random#townsfolk that aren't actually full characters or anything. And there's a community board where you can#browse some of the random job advertisments or silly things that happen to be posted around#and also pick up a few odd jobs of your own to help earn coin to buy gifts for the npcs. etc. etc.)#Originally I was thinking like 'ah I'll make a short little game just to try it out! :3 It'll take maybe a few months!''#haha........................hee hee........................................hoho#Also evil that it would have been done already if I didn't totally drop itand stop working on it for like 5 years randomly#i could have made 5 years of steady slow progress gradually. instead of like 'one initial idea dump + about a month of art and writing'#...... 5 year break..... 'sudden mad dash to try to get probably 400.000 words written in a year or less' lol#I just really want to be done and have something out there already so it can lead to doing other things in my world..!!!!!! T o T#Like this can be an introduction and then maybe from that I can make other games. or short story anthologies. or other such things#But there needs to be some initially not very complex easy to interact with starting point first I guess... if that makes sense#That's part of why I stopped posting worldbuilding lore dump stuff as often because its' like.. massive walls of novella length#text are much more inacessible to engage with than like.. ooh a game! and there's characters! so its more approachable! and theres#visuals! oo! and the text is broken up in small bits line by line with other things in betwen! oo! etc. etc. lol#Not that THIS is even very accessible. I think dialogue heavy interactive fiction/visual novel type stuff is pretty niche and considered#boring or tedious compared to something with more ''gamplay'' like where you can actually move around in a world#and shoot things or whatever lol. But its an inbetween point. something SLIGHTLY#more accesible for now. Since i just dont have the budget or means or ability to make some skyrim type thing obviously LOL#Though maybe if theres any interest in the visual novel that could lead to making other things too. or at least I hope. I have a VERY cool#idea for a more ''gamey'' type of game that is a super fun concept and etc. but I would need to hire at least 2 people to make it.. ough..#I could do all the writing and probably half of the art. But I think I'd inevitably need a 3d artist and someone who can Code For Real hbjh#the system for ren'py (the thing I'm making a visual novel in) is not that complicated if you stick to just simple dialogue and stuff.#Making a whole moderately sized 3d game with minigames in it and a bunch of quest features and etc. would be out of my simplistic scope#''just learn it yourself!!' ... i barely manage to eat and sleep reliably every day lol... i do not function well enough to spend months#learning that many new skills. I already have a lot of of things I'm good at (not in a braggy way but just factually like.. i already have#a wide variety of different things under my belt).. at some point I have to just be happy with what i CAN already do and focus on that#and admit I need to get outside help sometimes ghjbh... NO more new skills/hobbies!!! ... ANYWAY
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lacnunga · 2 months ago
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The real question is whether it would be too cringe for me to buy a second hand tiny cheap laptop to write on at work
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toriliashine · 4 months ago
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Multiclassed wyll into a warlock/ranger. Best decision I've ever made, live your Disney princess with a gun truth man
#he gains heavy armour proficieny and can handle martial weapons greatly increasing the damage he can do while still keeping the magic from#his pact#he finally has a chance of fully becoming rhe blade of frontiers#him and my tav can both be magical living weapons together qwq#wyll ravengard#but seriously the ranger knight tirle was made for him#theres also a mage breaker ranger title if yall knew i CHOKED#my tav is a sorcerer and i thought picking that would make for one too many jokess and coughs jsbdnsbdvdhej#too obvious too easily funny skbsdjbd#then i think my second option was ro make him beast master i think to summon scratch?#i thought of giving him sleight of hand but we hsve astarion for that and#he need to put his back into working and stealung for the team to make up for his anti gnoming and general evil doings#pet peeve i hate calling being anti orc anti goblin etc racism thwy are NOT different races they are different beings entirely!#each being has their own races within them im sick! everyones using the incorrect term!!#and i have to use the blasted inaccurate terms with them to get my points across! hate it!#lmao guess which background my tav has from this spiel sondkdjkdm#back to wyll take your gun your crossbow you4 axe your l9ngsword whatever you want#now youve multiclassed#you truly can have it all#yES he got his ass beat right after (we had just solved racism and hadnt healed then being nice to glut backfired)#ge got knocked out for a bit from an opportunity attack i didnt see whoop#s#glut got big hands#he coulda used them for something else if he wasnt such a bitch#burnt his corpse jic#back to wyll again truly a defender of the people now and not solely relying on mizsnoreahs magic#maybe hell stop missing so much!#still i actually remenbered to play wyll as a warlock in the ending slavery fight and it paid off#him killing off 2 people with a bolt spell was so cool i got draw him finger gun blasting people
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figofswords · 5 months ago
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I want to know which octopath developer woke up and chose violence
#yes this is about the extra battles#I’ve been working on them which has taken me a while bc I needed to level everyone first#and I FINALLY FINALLY got them all down#and then FUCKING OPHILIA#GETS UP FROM DEAD AND REVIVED EVERYONE#GIRL I KILLED YOU FIRST WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU JUST HAD RISE AGAIN LOADED AND READY. WHY CANT I DO THAT#tressa: invite friends (or whatever the fuck it’s called)#me: oh it’s them!!!!!! oh wait fuck#anyway we. died again. AND WE WERE DOING SO WELL#the current strat is scholar!temenos arcanist!agnea conjurer!castti and throne i had as merchant but her subjob matters less#castti keeps everyone bp boosted. temenos mainly is keeping everyone at full health#agnea latent power + reflective barrier#and then spam throne’s veil of darkness ability so they can’t land physical attacks either#and then repeat every time Alfyn neutralizes our buffs#the flaw with this strategy is everyone is busy doing damage reduction I don’t have a heavy hitter#especially since tressa keeps stealing castti’s ax#so it takes a really really long time to get them down#i think I might make castti a cleric and then swap osvald in for temenos#I’m worried about that bc osvald is so squishy but elemental attacks are the only thing tressa can’t STEAL#and the one true magic can break shields which will be helpful after ophilia FUCKING REVIVES EVERYONE WITH AUTO REGEN SHIELDS#before I was having good luck with ochette’s summon multiple beasts ability for shield breaking#but I don’t want to give up the reflective barrier/veil of darkness combo I’ve got with agnea and throne#and both of those are dependent on skills unique to them so I can’t just do thief Ochette or whatever#ugh. I’m gonna take a break and come back to this. Alfyn Greengrass you especially are not my friend anymore#actually that’s not fair TRESSA is my enemy. girl gimme my stuff back!!!!!!!!#octopath#octopath traveler
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fettery-fetterie · 4 months ago
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GIRL HELP WDYM I REACHED 30 TAGS??????? OMG???? I WASN'T EVEN DONE YET
ANYWAYS 31st: and that compared to a relationship where the communication lines are basically none or very fucking weak then yeah it is an upgrade I think. Idfk I was never in a relationship I'm just picking from the ones I've seen in my life
#it's like that one image i saw#under read more too bc i don't wanna get jumpscared#anyways i wanted to say#one thing is that I've been kinda into hlevpeka (how do you even call that?) for like. 2 years? 3?#it's just that it kinda fell off for me once i started thinking about the possibilities of hlevteo (which was around the end of 2023 so)#but ig the myth hunt trio as a whole is kinda making me pick it back#definitely the most underdeveloped out of the 3 tho. i have no idea what could lead to the same guy have weird shit going on with himself#well probably it is a want to learn about himself or something#they were separate for a good while so ig they wanna pick things back and learn together#what makes them them and what they like for themselves#and who can know you better than yourself (?) idk it's weird i need a good excuse still#anywayyyyys#I've also been thinking about something for hlevteo#like bc i want it to have significant differences over teopeka (healthier ones at that) and i think one of them would be like. transparency#and sincerity and “truth” (if you really wanna tie it back to myth hunting)#bc i feel they'd reach a point where they like. can be open with each other right#and i feel that'd amount to like. knowing stuff nobody else does#like teo would tell hlev like. oh yeah me and peka have been around for almost a decade now. yeah it was a very weird thing for those times#i think the reason why im even here with you is bc you remind me of him. ig i just gravitate towards you#and hlev would be like yeah dw it's fine. y'know you also kinda remind me of someone. of like- oh that's gonna be weird to explain#and then he explains to her the whole. Thing. about being a protagonist#and she'd be like “oh huh well alright. that's one more existencial crisis for me. anyways what does that have to do with anything#and he'd be like “yeah ok so the reason why i think im also around you is bc of the power dynamic(?) we have#like you're my boss still and i honestly like that? I think all those years of feeling helpless and powerless have kinda taken a toll on me#and she'd be like “oh huh alright i guess that makes sense. that's kinda sad tho”#(heavy projecting there with That Man™ but it's whatever)#anyways what im trying to say it's that like. it's not that the motives behind the attraction are healthier?#it's moreso the fact they explained them at length to each other that kinda is? bc then they can work from there right?#like they can like. at minimum make them not devolve into something obnoxiously bad
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trailblazey · 1 year ago
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gigi already doesn't like marleybonians she gonna be mad as hell after her study abroad trip turned spiral saving mission to krokotopia and revenge mission to marleybone
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girlthativealwaysbeen · 7 months ago
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my sister called me and kept asking excitedly that what's happening in my life and
#like life as in. i can't say love life but like you know what's happening with the guys and the girls#girl#and i was so tired#am so tired#i just made up an excuse that im too physically tired too talk to cut the call and told her id call her back but i won't#i want to okay i really do I want to hear about her life what's going on but she's not that type of person jinke saamne#i can just divert the topic from myself avoid talking about me she's determined and caring like that😭#just. kya batau main#i spent the whole day working but really if i stopped doing anything for like 2 minutes all the last convos i had with everyone i#liked loved whatever started replaying in my head constantly making me feel all down and sad in public yk that empty heaviness inside chest#i mean. what is there to say. i feel truly pathetic#everyone just keeps leaving me. they decide one day that oh nope she's not for me not interesting anymore doesn't understand is too much#draining and destroys my peace and then they leave#it doesn't even matter the weight of the relationship#whether it's been a year of being in love or two weeks of talking till 5 am or a week of wishing me good morning and good night#every day. it doesn't matter they leave and they leave and they leave and they don't look back and im left to pick up the pieces go on#pretend to be okay and normal and fucking focused on like. studying accounts as if my heart isn't breaking#into a million tiny pieces everytime#i don't know how to tell her. the sister you love so much the sister you can't live without imagine life without. the#sister who you thought about holding on for because you couldn't do that to her leave her alone when you had suicidal thoughts. she's#she's actually deeply unlovable undateable unfuckable and like truly lonely and easy to let go of#i know she loves me and i know my bestfriend loves me and she would fall apart if i wasn't there for her#but it's not enough. i really wish it was. but it's okay it's enough for now it's enough to keep me going it's enough to make me not wanna#die yk? like i don't love myself enough to live for myself get better for myself but they need me so i need to be okay be happy because i#need them to be happy. and they're happy when im happy#does that make sense#okay bye i should really start writing a diary
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thedevotionaltour · 2 years ago
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had an insane moment tonight where i just got repeatedly shamed by friends multiple times within minutes but it's ok now bc i don't have to see these people until next semester :) the minute you repeatedly make me feel bad within a matter of minutes and after i realize every time i hang out with you i feel bad you get put into the realm of "our friendship has a timer" ^___^ no more of this lol
#it was not like directly aimed at me but every single thing. applied to me :') and you kept going not to rag on comics majors BUT#for the next five minutes. in the worst way possible. and then kept saying how sex bad how heavy content bad. and frankly i am over it!#i was surprised by the friend who mainly did this but the other one has. done this so many times. and im just kind of sick of it.#im sick of feeling bad every time i see you. every single time.#i just think some people must remember. nothing wrong with discomfort. but your discomfort is not the be all end all correct moral opinion.#just doesnt work that way. at all.#vent.txt#also as someone who has an identity extremely important to them that at the end. is so directly tied to sex and pleasure and eroticism#for me personally at least. well. i hate to be in an environment where even the mere concept of sex is constantly shamed.#it makes me feel bad. and ashamed. and gross. and dirty. and like a fucking creep pervert. in all the worst ways#and it really is. genuinely. painful. it is painful to me.#because i am being told i am just wrong for having feelings that i do. and that im gross. and it has taken me a really long time to be ok#with this part of myself. and i still struggle with it constantly despite my ability to be more secure in myself#but i am constantly trying to remind myself. im not gross or disgusting for having wants and desires and needs. and that it's ok#and im not going to let that be taken away from me by people meant to be my friends.#granted yes i could do more to advocate for myself when this happens. but i know it would be a losing battle. so i just dont.#whatever! whatever! im done and im shutting up now!
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caruliaa · 2 years ago
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i hope the celling fan fall on yall 😒
#/ref obsessed with this phrase#anyway this is abt the fucingng obsession with the mario movie. dont wanna be a dick but omfg#the thing is like. a lot of the people just yk enjoy the fucking movie and thats fine and chill whatever#bowser sings one of my names at some point apparenty i dont have the right to complain whatever#but like. every person i trust to come at this with good faith has said that the movie is fun bc mario references and j being silly fun#whatever bla bla but other than thats it doesnt rly have much depth and like. isnt a superr great movie#but when everyone else comes at it with HOWW DAREE CRITICS NOT LIKE THE MARIO MOVIE ITS GOOD >:( its like. shut up#like you have to acknowledge when most of the joy of a movie comes from refernces not everyone gonna get#people arent going to treat it like its a masterpeice !! and thats okay whatever !!!#and the movie being fun without any other depth to it doenst automatically make it the most incredible movie ever#obvs the mario movies doesnt need to try to be emotional but like. you can make a movie thats but fun and emotionally impactful#at the same damm time !!!! its possible belive it or not !!!#the one of/most popular/well loved animated movie of last year and most popular movie overall of last year are both movies that#(while i havent seen one of them yet sorryy to the eeaaw girls 😶😶😶 will one day soon i prommy)#are both very fun and silly in places and known and loved for the emotinal impact they had on people cmon man !!#when the animated movie there is still in cinemas for many at the same time of the mario movie#the argument that the movie is fun or a kids movie so u shldnt expect any depth is dumb#the argument that its a mario movie and mario isnt a very plot heavy game makes more sense tho but i feel like#less ppl are making that for some reason? like it not no one but still. and the mario games are capable of depth sometimes#not to mention the reason having less depth with plot works is due to fun gameplay which idk if fun movie scenes can replicate fully#anyway enjoy the mario movie whatever have fun i literally love mario so fucking myslef and ik most ppl are like#being normal abt it and just enjoying a movie but man are the vocal minority just have fully put me off of it#my sibling is going tmrw and im not joining them bc im watching pibtlw w james+luce. but i also just dont wanna at this point#flappy rambles
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kindred-spirit-93 · 1 month ago
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HOO BOI. i desperately want to write volumes about this topic alone but ill stick to a tag rant because is have so much studying lol.
demeter they could never make me hate you. you were imo the only sensible person in the myth(s) actually and a good mum. fuck u zeus
The story of Hades and Persephone isn't an abduction romance, or even a tragedy of not being able to be in two places at the same time. It's about how fucking wild it would be to have a mother who gives a shit about whether you're dead or alive, and whether you are happy.
#hades and persephone#the ill get back to this eventually tag#sick with all the awful adaptations & retellings that romanticise aspects at the price of completely and irreversibly ruining others#look i dont care what u want to enjoy or wish to believe thats none of my business its all fun and games at the end of the day#but to so blatantly ignore the orignal mythos in favour of aesthetic or whatever and insisting *thats* the standard is just cruel#part of it falls on how much were missing in the critical thinking & media literacy department and tend to accept pop culture as is#again one of the beauties of literature is its potential for interpretations.. and storytelling relies on appeasing the masses#and reaching audiences and demographics and adapting to fit the everchanging social norms and all that jazz. i know#thats not what im referring to here#its the denial of nuance and refusal to acknowledge that hey sometimes a piece of media isnt really accurate? or right? like at all#(i for one as of late have been extremely fascinated w darkfics and heavy topics being explored in media.. esp in greek mythology)#and it honestly wouldnt matter if it werent for the vehement hate it breeds against the source material and the very valid#opinions on the other side of the coin. the least we can do is do some background reading and have some common sense guys.#in this case the erasure of justified rage and grief to accentuate rebellious femininity or whatever to me is just sad#making demeter the villain? a mother who was rightfully horrified after her (underage) daughter was stolen from her#making persephone who cried and mourned during her stay in the underworld a girlboss who waltzed in on her own volition?#in some versions of the myth hades tricked her into eating the seeds. she had no idea what the implications were. NOT COOL MY DUDE#look i actually like hades and persphone in terms of theme and symbolism. like a lot. im working on stuff with them in it#but keep in mind the people places and things at play when engaging with media. think of the prices that were paid and how it relates to us#myths serve to teach lessons and morals as well as explaining natural phenomena and other things. folklore doesnt exist in a void#also as much as i love to dunk on zeus for being a piece of shit and serial rapist#he is extremely complex and multifaceted as a god and king of the gods and much more than that. as is the case for everyone in the pantheon#agh i need to go before i go on a rabbit hole so deep i find iron lol
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featherymainffins · 8 months ago
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Binge-reading Dungeon Meshi because it's the only thing standing between me and suicide ngl.
#it at least gave me the single molecule of mental energy required to force myself to eat at least one slice of bread#because it's like the physical energy is there sure but mentally I'm like 'noooooo I don't want to eat anything i hate food#all food tastes bad and i hate life and i want to eat nothing at all and furthermore i need to lose weight so i should starve myself'#I'm thinking that it might actually make me last until I either convince the crisis center that I'm for fucking real for real#or until my appointment with the school counselor. which idk when would be because i was supposed to go on the#2nd of April but i guess there might be holidays because he called me when i was atva lecture but i couldn't take it#because i had a lecture and he hasn't called since but I'm assuming#that hell call again and that he wants to let me know that the date is impossible#but I want to like wait and see what he says. and if he goes like 'oh actually im on a long vacay now goodbye forever'#or whatever I'll just go '...slay' and ride my ass to the hospital tomorrow.#show up at the crisis centre looking exactly like the patients with chronic pain who report pain 7 while looking unphased#like 'hello i am an active danger to myself I can't get out of bed most days; i need 16 hours of sleep to function for 4 hours#my meds have stopped working I haven't eaten anything but exactly 2 pancakes and a slice of bread in the past 4 days#and i exhibit a strong refusal to change this marked by thoughts present in people affected by eating disorders. no activity#feels fun anymore and they were marked by a strong sense of anxiety a few days ago but now i just feel nothing at all.#at this point I'm not even refusing to do any of my hobbies because im increasingly afraid of failure and its#consequences while being hunted for sport by anxiety from the opposite end telling me that i need to finish 50 masterpieces#immediately or nobody will ever like me again and they'll all see me for the talentless fraud i am. at this point i just don't care.#i don't do anything because i feel sluggish and my body is heavy and I'm so so tired and I'm tired of being awake and I can't think straight#also i think i might be going into a psychotic episode again.'#they're gonna tell me to get the fuck out of their faces anyway but it's worth a try.#like idk i feel like they might kinda listen because yesterday I guess they wouldn't have but today i have stopped caring about cars#and looking both ways. which is like. not a good sign probably. also yesterday i was still somewhat able to talk to people#even though i was in a very irritated and drained out state but today I'm feeling like if anyone even fucking attempts to talk to me#or if i hear any loud fucking sound at all I'm just gonna punch myself in the head until the pain drowns out all the sound
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nighttimealone · 2 months ago
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Cw: Nsfw
You have an important document from your work that needs to be fixed now, but your poor boyfriend König already got worked up the moment you leant down to retrieve your book from a lower shelf moments ago, your ass in full display to him, so you compromise when he look at you with that heavy cock hanging between his thighs, “liebling, please, I won’t interrupt you doing your work.” he says while pulling you onto his lap, your core rest just against his growing erection. How can you say no when he pleads so nicely?
Your arms wrapped around his neck, typing on your phone and dealing with the job, while König humping like a dog in heat against your clothed pussy, groaning and growling just beside your ear as he prods his tip repeatedly at your clit, still cheekily trying to let you lose control and finish whatever you’re doing now. But he needs to be a good boy, he already promised you he’ll hold back until you have time, so he settles with grinding his cock along your pussy for now.
You hum in approval, sparing a glance at him and his dick when he slide it between your pussy lips, your panties’ already a mess after he pulled down the hem of your panties and pumped a load inside, clinging onto your skin and showing the curve of your mound.
“I can’t wait anymore, Süße…bitte bitte…” A grin decorates your lips as you see his face, all flush with the desire burning in his body, can’t even think straight and talk coherently, because sweetie, he just wants to sink his cock inside your drenched cunt and fuck you so good, overwhelm you in pleasure so you can forget about your job.
So you finally set down your phone. Actually, you already finished correcting the mistakes in your documents minutes ago, but the sight of him blabbering and moaning, like all he wants in this world is you and your pussy, is just too entertaining.
“Oh…oh my god…” Your teasing words don’t even have a chance to make their way out of your lips, the moment you put away the phone, he already stands up and flip you onto the mattress, slamming his cock inside you in one swift move, legs pressed back to your breast for mating press, pounding into you with the full force of his hips that you’re practically screaming his name in ecstasy.
Just don’t let him discover that you pretend to be occupied by work for a few more minutes, just to see him eagerly rolling his hips against your slick folds, unless you want to walk side to side the next day, from how he teach you a lesson with his weapon that he calls his cock.
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huh-i-guess · 2 months ago
Text
Fever
(Task force 141 x F!reader)
Summary: While out on a mission you are injected with a substance that might lead to a shift in the dynamics between the 141.
Warnings: SMUT 18+, sex pollen, fingering, dub-con/non-con (under the influence of sex pollen), choking, nasty Simon, Gaz has morals
Word Count: ~ 4.2k
(Reader's callsign is Pepper)
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I don't own MW2, the characters, or the gif above.
“What the fuck was that?” You shouted as you felt a sharp pricking sensation on your left ass cheek. You reached behind you to feel what was causing the sensation and groaned as you felt a syringe protruding from your behind. You looked down and noted that you had stepped on a pressure plate of some kind and triggered the laboratory’s defense mechanism.
“Oh fuck, lass.” Johnny mumbled.
“Shit, Pepper.” Gaz exclaimed in disbelief.
“No fucking way. Why does this shit always happen to me?” You yanked the dart-like needle from your behind and examined the leftover contents. The remaining contents appeared to be a blue syrup-like fluid. You sighed and pocketed the syringe hoping you could take it back to base to have it examined by the scientists at the lab. 
“Pepper, what was that?” Price called over the comms hearing the distress in everyone’s voices. Your thoughts ran at a mile a minute as you tried to figure out if you should tell your captain, that you probably had a mild crush on and always wanted to impress, that you just stepped on a trap. Or if you should lie. You hated lying to Price. It felt like you were letting him down and any time you did, you found yourself immediately retracting your statement and telling him the truth hoping he’d forgive your indiscretion. You readied your mouth to let out some kind of answer but snapped your mouth shut as you heard Gaz from your right side, “Looks like they tranqed Pepper or something. We were sweeping the lab and she was the first one in.” You turned your head toward Gaz and offered him a look that was a mix of thankfulness and regret. 
“Shite. You're still standing, lieutenant?” Price probed in a tone that, only those close to him could tell, was full of doubt and concern.
“Yes sir.” You pushed further into the lab taking extra care where your steps landed. The lab had been recently abandoned by russian terrorists working on some kind of bioweapon. You could only hope that you didn’t just get dosed with whatever they were concocting. As the three of you pressed further into the dingy lab you felt like the mass of your body was slowly doubling. 
“Soap. Gaz. If I drop, I need two to keep moving. We need to get this intel out of here as soon as we find it.” You could faintly hear the heavy footsteps of the terrorists behind you.
“No way in hell we’re leaving you behind.” Gaz contended. 
“Listen I-” 
You were quickly interrupted by Laswell’s voice in your ear, “Pepper. Evac will get to you and the boys in 11 minutes. It’ll be 2 clicks north of your current location. We’ll get you to the safe house from there.” 
“Copy.” You replied as Soap took a step closer and fixed his mouth to ready a response to your order. 
“Lass I don-”
“Listen. We don't have time for this. I don’t know what I got hit with but I know that at the moment we have a job to do. Let’s keep moving while I can and clear the files we came for. You will keep moving if I drop and that’s final. This mission can't be a waste of time.” You were met with an apprehensive “Yes Ma’am” and a “got it LT” and you snapped your head around to continue sweeping the lab. 
You knew you were being harsh but if you gave them room to argue you’d be stuck here going back and forth with them about it. Truthfully it was a ruse to make it look like you weren’t basically shitting bricks. You couldn’t stop the thoughts that flew through your mind.  I’m going to die today. Holy fuck I’m not making it out of this. I don’t know what I got hit with. How long do I have? You didn’t have much going on in your home life so the thought of a family didn’t even cross your mind until you thought about who around you did have one. Soap had his sisters back in Scotland that loved to “force” him to watch those really crappy rom-coms that he claimed he hated so much but then recommended for team bonding nights. Then you had Gaz who had his mom waiting at home for him. She always sent him care packages with little hand written notes that gave him updates on the status of his neighbors’ cat who had slowly been making itself comfortable on their property back in London. She even sent him photos of the cheeky little tuxedo cat. Your mind shifted from thoughts about yourself to thoughts about them. I have to get these boys out of here. They have so much going for them. They really are some of the best we have to offer. I can’t let them down. If I can't get out of here at least they can. 
Gaz went to the computer and plugged in a decryption device and began to sift through the scientist's digital files while Soap went through some of the scattered papers left in the room.
“They were in such a rush to get out of here they weren’t even effective at scrubbing their drives. Pep, I think I might have something.” You walked to the computer Gaz was stationed at and noticed a folder titled “Project Vitality”. 
“Good job, Gaz get it and we go. Soap anything?”
“A couple of poorly redacted files with the same name.” Soap chipped from your left. You made your way to him and patted his shoulder in praise.
“Alright we gotta move.” You heard the footsteps boom as the incoming enemies approached. You felt yourself slowly start to stall and noticed you had a difficult time focusing your eyes. It was like you were wearing a pair of glasses that weren’t meant for you and you couldn’t take them off. You willed your eyes to focus but it was becoming a hassle. Fuck me. You turned your head to Soap on your left and said, “Soap I need you to take point on the way out. I'll watch our backs as we exit.”
“Are you-” he started then pressed out a short, “Will do.” The look on his face was filled with so much concern, that for his sake, you almost wanted him to ask you if you were okay. He turned and rushed out of the room followed by Gaz and you at the back. The three of you navigated the winding corridors of the combatant base and made your way back, passing the rooms you had previously cleared. 
“Pepper. How we doing?” Price questioned over comms.
“Got the documents and drives, sir.”
“I know you did. That’s not what I’m asking about.”
“What kind of answer do you want, Cap?
“You know what I want to hear.” You knew Price wanted the truth but you couldn't let him know the fact that you might be starting to lose motor function and that the mass of your body felt like it had doubled. There was a large part of you that wanted to make him proud and craved his approval so the thought of disappointing him always stirred something deep inside you. But then there was Gaz and Soap. They were your sergeants and they often looked to you for guidance. The image they had of you rarely faltered from confidence and strength. They were right by your side and were clearly worried for you. If you told the truth to them they probably want to stop and question your status or maybe even try to do some kind of makeshift field evaluation on you and you’d definitely lose out on valuable time. 
A shaky, “I’m doing just fine, sir.” fell from your lips then silence. A sigh from Price that was then followed by a gruff, “Bring it in safe. I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Of course sir.” You acknowledged. He knew you were lying. The slight tremor in your voice told him exactly what he needed to know. 
Soap led the three of you out of the compound but not without running into a couple of the remaining terrorists that missed your group upon arrival. You, although struggling to see and move, caught the slight movement as you three made your way to the entrance of the compound. A brown jacket sleeve that moved just a bit too slow was all you needed to gather that the combatants had reached your location. Years of intense practice and strenuous training had you firing your weapon with a practiced precision that was barely impacted by your declining physical state. 
As soon as you exited the compound you were met with a glaring brightness from the snow of the siberian tundra. The almost blinding whiteness was a massive contrast to the dimly lit compound so the massive shift in intensity had your head spinning. Gaz noticed you stumbling but only met you with a face of concern and a hand on your shoulder as he watched you struggle to get your bearings. 
Trekking through the Siberian tundra in your worsening condition was one of the hardest things you'd had to do in your career. The whirling of the wind was so intense that it felt like someone was screaming directly next to your ear and the pressure of it was enough to make your head pound. The snow was coming down so hard that each snowflake that hit your face felt like a tiny pin prick over and over again. Your feet were so deep in the snow that it felt like you were gaining an extra 20 pounds of weight with the effects of the drug starting to control your movements. You tried to pull yourself together. It was undeniable at this point that you would not be winning the battle against whatever medication they injected you with.
“2 minutes till evac” Ghost chimed in your earpiece. Your hearing was so sensitive that you could almost feel the loud mechanical static and the whirl of the helicopter in the background of his response.
“Oh my days. Ghost is the one flying us out? I don’t want to end up out the bloody chopper again” Gaz groaned. Oh. I wasn’t the only one to hear the helicopter then. 
“It was either me or you freeze out there, Sergeant.”
“LT, if you fly that thing the way you drive, Gaz might be better staying down here. Less chance of him getting thrown from the bloody thing.” Soap chirped. 
The world slowly started to look like a mass of colors and shapes with no definite beginning or end. The only thing you could do at this point was push and pray that you were gonna have enough strength to make it to the evac point. Everything was so intense that overwhelming wasn't even the right word to describe the feeling. You struggled to pick up your head as you began to hear another distinct whooshing sound that could only belong to that of a Puma HC2.
“I’m here aren’t I?” Soap and Gaz stopped moving as Ghost put the helicopter on the ground. 
“I’m glad you are sir. Good to see you, Ghost.” Soapsaid as he flung the door open and made his way on the aircraft.
“Always good to see that ugly mug of yours, Johnny.” Ghost turned his head to get a good look at everyone. “ Pepper, you don't look too hot.” Ghost concluded as you dragged yourself into the seat next to what you could have only imagined was Gaz. The words that came out of your mouth were something along the lines of “Not” and “Good” but no one really understood you with how slurred your response was. They did however understand that something was really wrong when your body slumped backward and went limp next to Gaz. You could vaguely hear the commotion of Gaz, Soap, and Simon, around you as they shouted your name and desperately tried to keep you from slipping out of consciousness. The last thing you heard was Price pressing to be informed on your state and him telling Ghost to get all of you to the safe house. 
---
“A neurotoxin that sends the body into overdrive. Increases nervous sensitivity and impulsivity, and impairs functionality of the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus.” Price read from the lab report with a stubby cigar in hand.
“Why the hell would they want to make something like that?” Gaz questions.
“Apparently in small doses it can be used as an aphrodisiac that it increases blood flow throughout the body, promotes sexual stamina, and increases pleasure outcomes? They must’ve been trying to develop something to sell on the streets.” Price continues.
“Right so they dosed her with super viagra?” Soap questioned. 
“That's what it sounds like?” Gaz said. 
“I thought that stuff didn't work on women?” Simon interjected. 
“It looks like they’ve altered it so it impacts both sexes but they haven’t been able to work out the less desirable symptoms. Tachycardia, fever, headache, dizziness, loss of consciousness, heart failure, and death.” Price paced as he read the outcomes. 
“Oh shit.”
“Heart failure? Death? How do we make sure that that doesn’t happen?” Gaz frantically questioned.
“The only way the toxin can be expelled from the body is through coitus…” Price trailed off as he dropped his cigar into a bowl. That can’t be right. He read it three times just to be sure and the words on the page didn’t change. 
“Steamin’ Jesus.” Soap deadpanned.
“No blood way.” Gaz stood with an open mouth. 
“Someone has to fuck her.” Simon said. 
---
When you awoke, you noticed you were lying on a firm mattress and were surrounded by the smell of smoke laced with a heavy sweetness that only came from Price’s cigars. You felt undeniably cold and couldn’t help but to shiver. You rubbed your fingers across your palms and felt them drenched in sweat. As you slowly began to turn to your side, you were overwhelmed with the feeling of the rough sheet that laid under you. 
“What the fuck?” You noticed that you had been stripped out of your vest and snow gear and were left in your black polyester thermals. You could feel every inch of fabric that you wore and immediately moved to take off the thermals. You were left in your sports bra and underwear.  Why am I taking off my clothes? I’m freezing? You ran your hands up and down your body trying to get a semblance of warmth but then decided that putting thermals back on would be too much for your unusually sensitive skin. As you dragged your hand down the sides of your thighs you couldn't help but notice how good it felt to touch yourself. You moved your hands to your inner thighs and couldn’t contain the moan that slipped from your mouth. You brushed your hand over the gusset of your panties and whined at the feel of your hand gliding over your already sensitive clit. 
“Pepper?” rushed out of Gaz’s mouth as he entered the room. He looked over to the pile of thermals on the end of the bed. “How are you feeling?” he probed.  When did Gaz get so attractive? He wore a red henley that hugged his arms perfectly and his soft curls made an appearance without the presence of his well worn UK hat. He made his way over to you and touched your forehead. “You’re burning up. Damn. The fever’s started.” The feeling of his hand on you was almost indescribable. He was warm and firm and exactly what you felt you needed at that moment. 
You felt yourself acting on purely impulse as you grabbed his hand and dragged it down to your mouth. You started to kiss his palm and moved your attention to his thumb. You placed it firmly between your lips and began to suck. “Oh fuck.” Gaz exhaled as he watched you with wide eyes. You continued your ministrations and moved from his thumb to his index and middle fingers. You began to lick around his digits before you engulfed them in your mouth with a guttural moan. You could taste the salt and gunpowder from the mission and it only made you crave him more. You lifted your gaze to him and willed your eyes to meet his. The groan that fell from his lips was divine. You removed his fingers from your mouth and helped his hand descend to where you really needed him. “Fuck. No. I can't do that princess. Not when you're like this.”
“But I really really want you to. Come on, Kyle. It’ll help me feel so much better.” You purred. Gaz let out a shaky breath, pulled his hand from you, and walked out the room but not without you noticing him readjusting himself in his pants. Fine, I'll do it myself. You sighed and pulled your panties down your legs till they rested at your ankles. You slid your fingers between your legs and gasped at how wet you were. You slowly started to trail your finger through your folds, collecting some of the wetness that had dripped from you and began to rub your clit. As soon as your finger pressed against your reactive little nub you were in heaven. You started in small circular motions and rubbed until you felt you needed more. You moved your other hand to your breast and tugged at your nipple. You kneaded and grabbed your breast like it was the key to your survival. You’ve never felt like this before. It's like you can feel everything, everywhere, all at the same time. You felt the rough fabric of the sheets, the scratchy wool of the pillow behind your head and you felt the soft cotton that was resting around your ankles.  You were still shivering from the fever but you felt like you could feel the stimulation of your clit in your toes. You needed more. 
You moved your hand from your plush breast to rest right at your soaked opening. You circled your middle finger a few times just to get it wet, and sank right into your leaking entrance. “Oh fuuuuuck”. You could feel the pressure of the finger at your walls as you started to curve your finger inside of yourself searching for your g-spot. You continued rubbing your clit and curling your finger inside of you hoping to seek your elease. It felt so good but it just wasn't enough. You slipped in another finger and moaned at the intrusion. You started to pant and whine with how good you were feeling, but you felt yourself needing more. You continued the calculated movements and felt your orgasm approaching. You just needed a little more. One more push to get you there. One curl of your finger turned to two, then to three, then the pleasure turned into frustration. “Fuuuuuuck.” You groaned as you  pulled your fingers from your body and layed on the mattress in a heap of sweat and frustration. You felt yourself slowly drift back into the unconscious void even as you worked to steady your breaths.  
---
“She sucked my fingers. Wanted me to fuck her. With my fingers. Uh she begged me to. And she was down to her knickers” Gaz confessed as he dropped his eyes to his combat boots, too unsure to look at his team. 
“Did you lad?” Price probed. 
“No, I couldn't do it. I really thought about it and I- I don't know. She definitely has a fever though.”
“Hm.” Was all that left Price's mouth. 
“We're gonna have to check up on her. Make sure her heart isn't working too hard and see how to keep her satiated. For her sake.” Simon stated matter of factly. 
“Does it say it has to be expelled through “sexual intercourse” or can she just, ya know, uh.. “Get there”, and work it out her system.” Soap questioned, looking toward Price and seeking the answers he normally has. 
“Johnny. It says coitus.” Simon replied. 
“No one’s gonna fuck her like this. It’s not right.” Gaz stated.
“What if we have to?” Soap doubted.
“Maybe we should see if an orgasm is the solution. If that doesn't work then last resort, someone will do what needs to be done.” Price said with a sense of finality. 
---
You felt the press of two fingers at your carotid artery and shivered at the warmth they offered. You fluttered your eyes open and nearly jumped out of your skin when they met dark brown ones behind a human skull mask. You’d seen Simon before and regularly worked with him but you'd never woken to him standing over you like the grim reaper.  
“Jesus, Simon.” 
“‘Just checking your heart rate.” He confirmed. Simon almost always has his gloves on. To feel his fingers at your neck had you craving more of his touch. You grabbed his hand that was at your neck and splayed it across your jugular. You looked up at him with full, pleading eyes and felt him squeeze a bit. A light moan left your lips as you begged him to squeeze harder. The groan that left his mouth would surely implant itself in the depths of your mind for years to come. The sound coming from him went straight to your core and you felt yourself clenching your thighs. 
“Simon, please.”
“Fuckin’ hell. Don’t look at me like that. Not while you've got your knickers round your ankles.”
“Please. Si. I need you. I’m so fucking horny. I can feel everything Simon. Please just help me feel good. I promise I’ll be good. You can use me however you want. However you need to. Please.”
“Don't say that y/n.” He turned his gaze away from your face. 
“I mean it. Please help me.”
“Just my fingers darling.” 
“Yes. Yes, thank you so much.” You nodded your head eagerly and bit down on your lip. If your fingers weren't working to get you there, maybe his would. You parted your legs for him and he hung his head and rolled his shoulders while he let out a deep “Fuck”. His grip on your neck tightened and you felt your head go light. ���Oh fuck yes.” His other hand made its way between your plush legs and ran between your folds. Simon’s eyes were locked onto your pussy and he was in awe of how wet you were. He knew what the toxins effects on you were but to see them in person had him stiff as a board in his pants.  Fuck this was so wrong of him. He knew he wanted to help you but part of him was living out his sick and twisted fantasies. To have you, a stunning woman, dripping wet and begging for him to fuck you, he’d be insane to not feel at least a bit aroused. He dragged a finger around your clit and almost purred at the whine that left your lips. He continued to make slow and tedious circles around your clit. 
“Simon, please I need more. Can you - mmm fuck- can you fuck me?” How could he deny you when you’ve asked him so nicely. 
“Only with my fingers, darling.” He slipped in two fingers and groaned at how tight you were. Your back arched so deeply and he wondered to himself what it would be like to be behind you when you arched like that. Simon began to work his fingers inside of you. He started with slow but deep pumping motions and moved onto scissoring his fingers inside of you searching for that special spot that he knows will make you tick. Your breath hitched in your throat and you let out a long high pitched squeal. 
“Is that it, darling? Right there? Hm?” He beamed with a sense of condescension that made your pussy tighten on his fingers. 
“Oh fuck Simon. Please, please let me cum.” His fingers were hitting all of the right parts of you and you felt your orgasm nearing. 
“Of course you can come, darling. Fucking soak my fingers. I know you need it. Come on, darling.”
You slid your hand down to your clit and rubbed it in furious circles. His grip tightened on your neck and you felt fuzzy everywhere. “Cum all over my fingers. Make a mess, why don't you.” And at that final comment from Simon, you felt the band within you snap as you had one of the most intense orgasms of your life. Your toes curled and your back was nearly curved into a C shape. Your pussy clenched and unclenched as Simon continued his assault. You felt your ears ringing from the intensity of the orgasm and felt like you lost hearing for a little moment. As you panted and tried to recover from your climax, Simon removed his drenched fingers from you, lifted his mask to just below his nose, and brought his hand up to his mouth. He locked eyes with you and you watched him in amazement as he cleaned you from his fingers. Your eyes flutter at how intense the sight was. His strong jaw, scarred but pink lips, and traces of stubble left you wanting more. He moved the hand that was on your neck back to your pulse point to check your heart rate.
“It’s slowed a bit. Get some rest," and with that he left the room and you felt yourself slip from consciousness.
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amaranthinespirit · 3 months ago
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size difference with könig and virgin!reader
he knew it was going to hurt; any man the size of him would reflect that under his belt. any woman, no matter the body count, would be in for it during a night with a brute like him.
but when you came along, doe-eyed and so much smaller than him, something stirred on the bottom of his abdomen. behind the zipper of his jeans, his cock chubbed up at first glance.
he was already huge enough to see the outline of his bulge through his jeans, or whatever cargos, he wore, but his growing erection made it that much more obvious.
he had never been one to notice before, but with you, he couldn't help it. the way he dwarfed you as you stood by his side, your (much) smaller hand completely engulfed by his giant one.
despite the size difference, he was gentle—as gentle as he could be. a brute as big as him with a tiny doll like you—like porcelain, you were going to break. and he was going to be the one to break you.
he ruts his hips against yours, his bulbous tip collecting your slick along his cock. a whimper, or mewl, escaping your throat whenever he grazes your clit. his breathing is heavy, muttered curses and phrases in german under his breath.
"so eine hübsche muschi, nur für mich..." his voice is hushed and low, as if he's talking to himself about how heavenly your puffy lips are against his girthy cock.
he keeps a large hand around the base of his girthy dick, the other planted on the bed, just above your hip as he steadies himself. the bed is dipping heavily with the focused weight.
he finds himself growing impossibly harder at the sounds of your strained squeaks, watching the sweat bead down the side of your face before his eyes find where his cock lays heavy against your sopping cunt.
your thighs slick with arousal and previous climaxes as he had worked you open on his tongue and fingers, his skin glistening under the light. your juices painted his chin, his fingers pruned from being buried deep in your sensitive pussy, desperately swallowed by your spongy walls.
he hummed lowly, almost a groan as his hand around his girthy base slapped his cock against your slick labia, the head of his cock beating against your swollen, hypersensitive clit he'd been toying with all night.
"diese muschi gehört mir, nicht wahr? hmm...?" you knew not what he said, but his tone was smug, cocky as he gave your cunt a few more slaps with his dick, humping his length between your folds.
you were squirming under him, not even fucked by his huge cock yet, and you were already on the brink of overstimulation, teetering along the lines of being too much. but it was just right.
his hand propped on the bed found your waist, stilling you as his hips halted, dragging his tip down your pussy to your leaking slit. evidence of previous orgasms spilled from your hole, "shhh, sei still, mein schatz..." he cooed, a callouses thumb tracing along the soft, supple skin of your waist before digging his fingers into your flesh.
he needed self control as he lined his cock with your hole, teasing along the folds before beginning to split you in half. whimpers falling from your lips at the mere task of just fitting the tip past your entrance.
he groaned loudly at the way your pussy welcomed him, swallowing his bulbous head with a squelch and a tight pulse as he stretched you open. the previous rounds of his finger and tongue doing nothing to aid the sheer stretch of your cunt around his dick.
it hurt like hell as he inched his cock deeper, reveling in the way your face contorted, strangled cries leaving your lips as tears pricked your eyes. your face flushing pink as salty trails glistened down your heated cheeks.
it was like you were practically impaling yourself on his thick, meaty cock. your body being split down the middle to accommodate for such space he took up in your cunt, your spongy walls clamping tightly around his dick.
"Scheiße, schatz...du bist so eng..." he cursed, his hand around his girth retracting to his hip.
he watched as his cock sunk deeper past your puffy lips, the way your pussy swallowed him with a sickening, lewd squelch that made his eyes flutter shut. his hips bucked, followed by curses as he couldn't help himself from rocking his hips. speeding up to a comfortable pace.
the skin of your backside quickly flushed red as his pace became more and more relentless—he had told you before he wasn't good with virgins. you assured him you could handle it, and he promised he would try to be gentle. key word, try.
well, he had tried, and failed as his hips desperately rut into your heavenly, slick pussy with lewd sounds of your skin coming together rapidly. his full, heavy balls slapping against your backside with each time his hips pounded into your cunt.
he was a lost cause, muttering incoherent phrases of half-german, half-english. most of what you could pick out was praises to your pussy, how you were made to fit his cock in your tight hole—though you were too cock-drunk, babbling nonsense into moans under him to hear a word he said.
"verdammt, deine muschi ist der himmel, kleines mäuschen..." he praised in a coo, his body now leaning to cover yours, his heavy weight pressing your back further into the mattress, "so verdammt eng und nass..."
his hand on your waist slid down to your stomach, he swore he could feel the skin warp under his calloused prints as his bulbous tip slammed your cervix.
when his eyes finally left where your two body conjoined, up to your pretty face where tears streamed down your cheeks, disheveled hair splayed across the pillow behind your head and matted to your forehead. his eyes fluttered shut as his dick twitched and throbbed against your spongy walls.
your pained cries turned to whimpers and hiccuped moans, hands clawing at his back to pull him impossibly closer in a desperate attempt to feel him deeper.
it wasn't long until you felt another warmth building in your lower abdomen, familiar in feel to the previous, but so much more hammering as it built, and built, and built.
könig could feel how you sunk your nails into his back, as if you feared he would deny you the ecstasy of release. he felt the way your cunt clamped around him, pulsing in sync with your heartbeat—his too.
his hips faltered—he had never finished this quick, but then again, your pussy was like a fucking drug, and he was an addict.
"das ist es...that's it, mauschen..." he whispered breatlhessly into your ear, his heavy, warm breath against your skin as he waited for your release to boil over with his.
he moaned loudly against your sweat, sticky skin, uttering more praises under his breath as he felt his cock twitch. he watched the way your jaw went slack, how your body shuddered under him before going limp, boneless under his weight.
a shuddered breath slipped past his lips as he came deep in your pussy, painting your walls a creamy, thick white as he filled you. his eyes fell back to your pussy, watching as he's milked dry of every last bit of his pearly, white cum.
he rubbed a rough thumb over your clit, watching you flinch and squirm from the sensitivity as he kept an eye on how his gooey release oozed from your hole, despite the fact his cock was still plugged inside of you.
he hummed lowly in appreciation as he took two fingers to spread the thick substance to coat your folds.
fuck, maus, you were ruined for anyone else now, guess you're stuck with him.
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