#that is never alright) you dont get a pass) you dont get sympathy

[aalt-ctrl-del]

people on the "Stella did nothing wrong train" often argue that Stella too, is vulnerable and traumatized by the situation she was placed, same as Stolas. And they make grievance that "fans are wrong for supporting Stolas in his time, and adoring bird prince, but condemn Stella even tho she's in the same sitch"

y'all are forgetting Exhibit A!

Teh reason why fan are loving and supporting Stolas, and condemn Stella as the toxic bitch, is because Stolas - despite his circumstances - has tried to make this arrangement he has with his (ex)-former wife as comfortable and pleasant as possible. He has been nothing but kind, if not distance and perhaps respectful of her needs and desires - it is implied in the first episode and the childhood one, that he was tolerant and patient with Stella, despite her broadcasted hate for him, and her boastful claims that he was worthless as a Goitia.

A person can be hurt, traumatized, resentful, damaged by the circumstances of their birth and the legacy they are meant to inherit - it never gives them the right to torment and destroy someone else. It is never excusable for that person to hate and continue hurting someone who has done nothing but the best that could be done, in those situations. Stolas might have inherited a broken, preprogrammed hate monger, but he made the effort to extend compassion and kindness and make a home for that person; the response of one who is given the opportunity to do better, recover, or even reevaluate who they are and where they come from was squandered and destroyed - which seems to be Stella's go to method of internalizing her spite and anger for the world. She destroys everything good. She strangled a bunch of hellhound pups, or whatever those crechures were in the picture of her as a child.

Stella is actually a very deep and complicated character if you really look at her and her reactions to those around her. She does not appreciate her daughter, she despises Stolas (who she views as weak and pathetic, and a disgrace), and she is shallow as all fuck. Which has made her the person she is. And it is her own choice to behave and react in such a way, despite her privilege, despite her access to help and happiness (Stolas is medicated, and working on himself). But Stella is completely satisfied with who she is, and has no regard for others; which hurts those that would love her, or at the minimal could appreciate her company. If Stolas was a pompous and arrogant monster, like we thought he was in the pilot, STELLA STILL WOULDN'T BE HAPPY. Nothing would make her happy. Because her character type is one that intentionally destroys and hurts those around her, because she has unaddressed resentment for her circumstances.

But no amount of help or love, or extended support will fix her. Because Stella is not interested in fixing herself, or being a better person. Because she is perfectly happy with who she is, hurting others, because that right there is what gives her life purpose.

*yeets the mic*

[cat-autism-wizard]

wes watching phantom is nothing new. everyone knew wes was spitting nonsense about that poor ghost boy and they just stopped listening to him at one point. it came to bite in the ass for him.

after the countless fight for the day, phantom was tired of everything and just wanted to go home and sleep but lady luck never smiled at the fentons other than to mock them. as he was flying towards a safe space to change back he heard very familiar voices shouting after him.

"we will catch you phantom and we will dissect you molecule by molecule." he heard his father shouting.

not this again.

he usually was better at avoiding his parents but this time his exhaustion was catching up to him.

wes saw phantom flying and decided to follow him. he knew nothing was going to happen since it was the fentons. until they shot him. wes didnt think too much about the shot, danny endured so much worse than a little shot from his parents. wes saw danny fly away to behind some building, probably to transform so he could get rid of the target on him. so he waited him to come out of nowhere to excuse him of being phantom but he didnt come out.

"i swear to ancients if you flew away to not to face your parents or me i will-"

wes' sentence was cut by the scene in front of him. danny passed out on the ground with blood coming from where he was shot.

"fenton?"

shit. this wasnt supposed to happen. it shouldve been the regular easy-to-heal wound, not the wound-so-bad-turned-human wound. shit shit shit SHIT. what was wes supposed to do? he cant leave him like that, even though they dont get along the best danny was still a person, half ghost or not.

wes decided to go to the fentons for help. he could get danny some help and could expose him too. two birds with one stone.

what he didnt expect was how the fentons react.

maddie and jack laughed like it was the funniest joke ever.

"you silly boy. ghosts cant turn humans, if something like that happens its just a ghost manipulating you to pity it." maddie said.

"no i mean what if theyre a half ghost?" wes tried to explain but it was to no avail.

"nonsense, everyone know half-ghosts dont exist. theyre like leprechauns, nonexistent!" jack stated.

their ideas were not even budging even a little.

"what if that ghost turned into someone you know?" wes asked trying to hear some sympathy or just a little hope that they will help.

"then we will regret that ghost ever taking that form." maddie said smiling but anyone could tell it was a violent smile.

shit.

wes weston was a lot of things. observant, annoying, stubborn.. and apparently stupid was one of them.

he was stupid to think two of the most ghost obsessed mad scientists could change their ideas just by his words.

"oh. oh yeah alright. i uhh i need to go." wes sadi and ran towards the place danny was lying unconscious. he tried his best to put some pressure on the wound to hopefully stop the bleeding. the moment he put his hands on it he heard danny hiss with pain.

he didnt know what to do. he couldnt call an ambulance, half ghosts probably had a different bodily functions he guessed after seeing danny avoiding to go infirmary even after a concussion in the school. he couldnt call his parents apparently.

"who knows about phantom after than me. think wes think" he thought out loud. then he realized.

ancients he really was stupid.

wes tried to find danny's phone in his pocket and called one of his friends to get them to help.

as the phone was ringing he was getting more anxious and worried by the second.

"dude this better be good i was middle of a mission in do-" wes cut tucker.

"foley i'll send our location. you have to help fenton."

"wait is that you wes? why do you have danny's phone? i didnt know you were a fully a creep-"

"folley shut the fuck up and come here. fenton's hurt." the line went quiet. then wes heard some typing and a chair noise.

"i texted sam. send us the location we'll be there in 5. and wes if something happened to danny because of you i'll make sure you regret everything." tucker hang up. wes expected a threat but he thought it would come from the goth and not the geek.

wes send their location and tried to get danny in a more comfortable position without moving him too much. he put danny's head on his lap and pray to the ancients that tucker and sam would be there soon.

tucker and sam came after five minutes like tucker said but for wes it felt like hours.

sam without even talking started to tend his wounds best way she could while tucker started to ask questions to (investigating) wes.

"what happened to him?" tucker asked with no sign of his normal upbeat tone.

"his parents. fenton was flying and they shot at him and actually succeeded then he flew here i followed him and i found him lying on the ground unconscious." wes explained.

"so you were stalking him again." sam spitted like venom.

"i was not stalking. i saw him and i followed him. would you rather him dying here with no one by himself?" wes argued.

"dont you fucking there saying stuff-"

"sam thats enough. we will shout at him later." tucker tried to stop sam. she mumbled a 'fine' and continued to make sure danny was not losing any blood.

"he needs ectoplasm and blood." sam said after a while of silence.

"ectoplasm is easy we can get into fenton lab easily but why blood? he never needed blood before." tucker asked.

"yes because he never go unconscious when he got shot like this. he lost blood as a human too this time." she stood up as she collected her aid bag. she sighed.

"i dont know how we're going to find blood for him though. i could try to buy some but it will land us in a list or something. we cant go to a hospital and cant ask his family for some blood." she thought out loud like she was asking them.

"i can give it to him." wes said suddenly after a quick thinking.

"he has an O negative type he could only get from O negatives." sam explained annoyed.

"i am an O negative." wes said as he took of his jacket and put under danny's head as he stood up. sam and tucker shared a glance.

"i guess it would work." sam said with defeat. "tucker you get the ectoplasm from the fentons, i'll get wes and danny to my house for the blood transfusion." she gave out orders. tucker nodded hurried up to the fentonworks.

"help me get him to my house." sam said, wes just nodded and lifted danny bridal style and sam got her aid bag and wes' jacket. he was careful not to touch the wound or fuck up any bandages. all the years he knew danny for the first time he looked vulnerable like that. it hurt wes' heart. he looked tried, it was obvious he didnt get any sleep more than a day. he was too focused on not hurting danny, he was only reminded of sam's existence when he heard a pic take noise. he gave her a questioning look.

"black mail." she said as if it explained anything for wes.

"dont worry my house isnt that far." sam informed wes and started to walk, wes following after her. after a little while they stopped in front of the manson mansion. sam waited for wes' reaction to be like everyone else's but he just stood there and waited for sam to open the door.

"not gonna react? 'wow you were actually rich? why didnt you tell anyone?' or something?" sam mocked as she was unlocking the door. then she realized something.

"wait dont tell me you already knew my house because of the stalking." sam accused. wes with wide eyes.

"what? no!! seriously do you guys think anything about me other than a creepy stalker? i figured out you were rich after you paid for almost everything for the both and even offering to buy blood if it didnt land you in some list!!" wes defended himself.

"now can you open the door so we can get to saving your friend, who im carrying?" sam opened the door and guided him to her room.

"put him on my bed. i'll get the syringe." wes did as she said and sit on the bed waiting for sam. he stared at the boy who was on the bed. his white shirt he always wore now had blood stains and another stain wes guessed as ectoplasm. he was sweaty from the pain, his hair was sticking to his face. wes gently removed his hair from his face and stared some more.

wes was an observant person but he never really looked at danny other than him being the phantom. now he looked at him as a person and not just phantom. and he was pretty. really pretty.

"alright weston, roll up your sleeves." sam came into the room with the necessary equipment at hand.

"have you done this before?" wes asked as he rolled his sleeves up.

"with blood?? no. i did it with ectoplasm multiple times though. however they feel different, so it'll be different for me. blood is more liquidy than ectoplasm." sam explained as she set the stuff accordingly.

"this does not help me relax at all." wes mumbled with anxiety.

"relax it will be fine. probably." sam flashed a teasing smile. wes gulped.

sam carefully inserted a sterile needle in wes' arm. they were really lucky that wes grew out of fear of needles or it would be impossible for him to stay with a needle on his arm in a teenager's room without any professional.

oh ancients he was about to lose it.

"ho-how many more you do you- uhh do you need?" wes stuttered. sam checked the blood in the bag.

"not much like a five minutes top. why?" she turned to wes, who looked like they saw a ghost which ironic because he was currently donating blood for a ghost.

"wait. are you afraid of blood? wait, no you were fine when you were helping danny. are you afraid of needles?" sam grinned. wes didnt say anything knowing it was pointless to deny it.

"wow. thats what i call a character development. giving your archenemy your blood even if youre scared of needles?" sam started to laugh. wes wanted to deny it but with everything that was happening she could be right.

"hes not my archenemy." he mamaged to get that out.

"sure whatever you say, weston. but good news is the is enough for now. we could think about other options when danny wakes up." sam said as she get the needles out of wes' arm. he sighed with relief. she started to set the bag for danny when the door rang.

"wes open the door its tucker." sam said as she continued to set things up. wes opened the door for tucker.

"okay i got some ectoplasm luckily i think its from the blob ghosts' ectoplasm so no ghosts were damaged with this one also i saw some disturbing new weapons." tucker started to explain as he gave the container to sam.

"what kind of weapon?" sam asked.

"was it the one they used on fenton today?" wes asked. tucker was about to start explaining but he stopped himself.

"sam can we talk after you set up danny's ectoplasm and blood?" sam nodded and finished up inserting needle into danny's arm. she put the contained ectoplasm into a bloog bag and put next to blood. after the blood she was gonna set the ectoplasm to the intravenous line.

after the set up tucker and sam went out of the room to talk. wes sighed. he couldnt blame them for not trusting him. he did try to expose danny to everyone everyday for two years now.

as the time passed by wes pulled up a chair next to the bed and waited.

then danny moved.

"danny?" wes gently said as if he was afraid of waking him up.

"wes? why are you here? where am i?" danny tried to get up only stopping when he realized the needle in his arm. he looked around and was relieved when he realized its somewhere he was familiar with.

"dont move. i'll get manson." wes stood up but danny held his arm to stop him.

"alarm her later, she wont let me breath if she knows." danny said weakly and sat up. wes didnt think it was a good idea but still played along and sat down.

"what happened?"

"you were shot and then passed out i found you, called foley and now youre here." wes explained briefly.

"shit." danny said as he started to remember stuff.

"do my parents.. know?" he asked but he didnt want to hear the answer.

"no. they dont." wes assured. danny looked at him with suspicion in his eyes. he didnt blame him.

"i'll get manson." he get out of the room this time without letting danny stop him again. then he overheard tucker and sam talking.

"what do you think? should we trust him?" tucker asked.

"he does seem changed but i dont think we can trust him just yet." sam replied.

he couldnt blame them.

he knocked on the door to alert them. that he was coming.

"hey, danny's awake." he said. both tucker and sam quickly went into the room to check up on their friends. it was more of a scolding than a check up.

wes smiled at sight. he had so much to think about. he went to the door.

"where are you going?" danny called out for wes. he turned back.

"since you were good, i thought i would leave you guys alone." wes explained like it was the most obvious thing ever. the trio exchanged looks and turned back to wes.

"do you wanna stay more?" tucker asked.

"what?"

"he asked if you wanted stay more, weston." sam repeated.

"why?"

"geez we thought you would like to stay more. no need to-" wes cut sam mid sentence.

"no no i mean why would YOU want me to stay? you dont trust me, understandably so. we're not friends. i actively put you in danger by trying to exposing you. why would you want me to say?" wes explained still not processing the question.

"because you helped me." danny said. continued to explain when he saw wes' confused look.

"if you actually wanted to hurt me you would left me to perish or expose me at my lowest but instead you stole my phone to call for backup."

"also gave blood while being afraid of needles" sam added.

"also uncharacteristically you were quiet the whole time you were helping, you listened to us without questioning." tucker stated.

"so? what? are you gonna give me the 'not much of an asshole as i couldve been' award?"

"no, we're giving you a chance to be less much of an asshole. like a second chance." danny explained.

"it still doesnt make any sense. why would you-" wes started to argue.

"wes just shut up and join us for the day, okay?" danny said with a faint smile. wes looked at the trio. they seemed genuine.

"okay."

wes never knew he had so many common interests with the trio. they talked for hours, never excluding wes from the conversations and explaining stuff if he didnt understand.

he felt good.

[sockiestupidity]

Eating Habits-Miguel O'Hara x platonic!teen reader

sequel to my last fic???-am i fr going to make this a series👁️👁️

Miguel notices a change in your eating patterns😧

warnings-bad writing/grammar/dialogue, angst, bad eating patterns, possible ed???, ooc miguel???, implied abuse/neglect (reader has bad eating patterns bc of fam), might be triggering for some, dw they end up happy again i promise, the word mijo is used like once???

again implied nonverbal reader (nonverbal rep bc i said so🫡) making this up as i go tbh-reader may use aac or communication cards

autistic coded reader????

AGAIN, ENGLISH MAY BE MY FIRST LANGUAGE BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT IM GOOD AT IT(AGAIN, JUST MAKE THIS CLEAR, I AM INDEED A NO SABO KID🥴)

povs may possibly change at times-lowercase intented as usual🤩(possibly no use of y/n in this one🤷‍♂️) IM SO TEHE AB THIS MAN (AND SPOT BUT WE DONT TALK AB THAT) sorry for all the warnings, just wanna make sure yall know what to expect

over time, you and miguel had.. unexpectedly started to bond more and more, which surprised a lot of spiders. the two of you were both equally closed off, but even then miguel had interacted with more spider people than you had. since your arrival, miguel had been the only spider person you had interacted with due to your mistrust.

most of the spiders had decided to simply not acknowledge your new friendship with miguel..simply because miguel had scared them off for you.

with you and miguel forming a new bond, he started to notice something about you..

while you enjoyed all types of cooking and baking, you never really ate much. miguel had chosen not to acknowledge it because he thought you just had a smaller appetite than most spiders, and he also thought his judgement was just clouded due to the fact that he had to eat more than most spiders did.

maybe your portions just looked small because of his size? he glazed over the thought, but it didn't make much sense, he ignored until..

your eating habits became worse, he had now come to the realization when he decided to treat you to a hamburger and you only ate a couple of fries..days later he noticed that when you had cooked something for the rest of the spiders, you hadn't plated any food for yourself. he felt a heavy pang in his heart, he knew the signs, because he would often neglet his humger needs due to his work.

when he brought up his concern that you were not giving yourself food you simply pulled out your cards, flipping to a card that said "no" and another that said "hungry". (A/N-i refuse to believe that reader would have "not" on their card bc "no" is way more conventional so pls dont come at more for this)

miguel heavily sighed, if course he didn't believe you, he could see the fear and sadness in your eyes. when he saw that look, he knew he had to do something.

a couple days had passed and you had stopped cooking and baking all together. you were simply just sitting on a couch that was placed in the HQ living quarters for everyone to use when suddenly you saw a large figure in your peripheral vision. you instantly knew that it was miguel. (A/N: MANS LITERALLY WEARS HIS SUIT EVERYWHERE OK?😭)

once he was in front of you, you decided to look up to him, furrowing your eyebrows to indicate your confusion. he wore an expression that you still were not used to identifying.

sympathy.

he pinched the brige of his nose, this was going to be harder than he thought, "we have to talk, mijo".

you pulled out your phone, getting your acc app ready incase if you need to respond to whatever he was about to announce. trying to do so calmly, as to not make him worry.

you gave him a nod, as to let him know that you were listening. he moved in order to sit next to you on the couch, his weight making a significant shift on the cushions.

"i need you to look at me alright? you don't even have to give me eye contact" he didn't want to pressure you, because he knew how much stress eye contact gave you at times.

you looked in his direction and tilted your body towards him.

he took another deep breath in and out before saying, "i noticed that you've been.. eating less, i mean, eating less than you usually eat.." he trailed off, he had to think carefully about his next words.

as soon as he said this, you looked away with a pained expression on your face.

he touched your cheek, and you flinched at the movement. "hey, none of that alright? i just want to make sure that everything is fine, mijo. has there been something on your mind recently?" he removed his hand from your cheek, wanting you to be able to fully process everything.

you let out a sigh and clicked one of the words you had preset on your app. "family" the robot voice spoke.

miguel nodded, although he hadn't seen everything that had happened he knew that overall, it wasnt the best situation. there was a pause before the robot voice began to speak again.

"food. bad" miguel's heart broke, and his strong stature had softened. he wanted to hug you, but he wasn't sure if he was overstepping your boundaries.

he carefully thought over his words before speaking, "never let anyone ever tell you that good is bad for you, alright mijo? it gives you strength, and helps you live" he looked right at you, making sure you digested every word he had said. he could see you blinking tears away, but they just continued flowing.

abruptly, you began to hug him. miguel was caught by surprise at this, as you buried your head into his chest. he awkwardly patted you on the back.

"from now on, i'll help you out" he stated. he felt you nod your head in agreement, head still buried in his chest.

from then on miguel made sure to coach you during mealtimes, giving you praise when you started to eat normal portions. (a/n hes channeling his inner sport mom vibes🥰). with miguels help, you started to feel more comfortable treating yourself to small treats, and even eating infront of people without caring what they thought about you.

at this moment you realized that, miguel might be your true family.

A/N: CURRENTLY SOBBING DID NOT MEAN TO MAKE THIS SO SAD IM SO SORRY PEOPLE.

on a realer note:if reader is just like u fr id encourage you to please seek some form of help/support system💞its important that u take care of urself-there are multiple free resources that you can find online just with a simple google search

small explanation ab readers fam: due to neglect, reader was never given a lot of food, and the food they made would be for their fam. and their fam would often shame them when they were allowed to eat (again, if reader is just like u fr, pls seek some sort of help)

also if we could please refrain from using the comment section to trauma dump/nbr (i am not a professional, nor am iequipped to handle other's problems)

[jm-2406]

Hi,

I was wondering if I could make a request for a matt murdock x reader idea. You could make it into a headcannon or a dribble I dont mind ✨.

Basically I’ve always found interesting the idea of matt either loosing his powers or his hearing senses (like in season 3)

So id think about something like that happening to him and the reader helping him found himself in his new routine without his vigilante identity.

(insecure and « in need of love » matt is my weakness jsjs)

Lots of angst but a happy ending if possible

(Also its preferable if reader is just a civilian too)

Thanks 🦋

Love me tender.

Summary - an unfortunate accident almost cost your boyfriend's life but you are there to help him recover, even if he gets emotional and says stupid things.

Pairing - Matt Murdock x teacher!reader.

Word count - 855.

Note - I'm sorry for being so late in delivering this, I got my exam results and it was not good. I was upset, so I couldn't get anything done.

Warnings - rushed ending, mentions of accident/injury, Matt and reader having a heart to heart.

Requests - open || find my work - here.

It came as a shock to you when a phone call disturbed your sleep at 3 a.m. informing you about your boyfriend's accident. You were the only person on his emergency contact and the hospital staff were quick to inform you. When you reached the hospital gates, a fear gripped your heart. You were not sure what happened with Matt exactly but you could make out that it was something very serious from the nurse’s words.

“[Y/N] [Y/L/N], I am here to visit Matt Murdock.” You informed the receptionist. She typed something on her computer and directed you towards the ward. That night, you had the biggest shock of your life as you waited for the doctors and nurses treating Matt.

“It was quite a fatal accident, Miss [Y/L/N]. We're lucky that he survived but he might take some time to recover and from what we have gathered, he might have some problems with his external auditory canal.”

“But… he'll be okay, right? He will recover, right?” You asked him. The doctor nodded his head and left because of another case. It was all up to you now, to let him know. You knew how upset he felt if treated with sympathy, you felt like that too. You just wanted him to recover completely before taking any risks with his life.

A few days later, when you were sitting quietly in the living room and grading the test papers, you heard a cracking sound. Rushing to the kitchen, you saw your boyfriend standing and in front of him, a broken glass. “Are you okay? And what are you doing here?” You carefully reached him and brought him back to your room.

Before you could scold him for being so careless and not resting enough, you saw him sitting quietly, too quietly like a statue. He was holding his mask in his hand. It was high time now, you needed to talk. You placed your hand on his shoulder and got his attention. Matt was still quiet.

“You can't carry on like this, Matt.” You said after a moment of silence.

“I don't know what to do. I'm lost, okay. This feeling… the feeling of being helpless and staying at home all day… it kills me. I feel like I failed.”

“No matt. Please don't say things like that.” Your voice was thick with emotions. “We can go through anything if we are together. Please don't shut me out.”

Matt gave you a sad little smile and you knew that you had a long road ahead of you.

A few days passed with you and Matt adjusting to the new life without his vigilante identity. It was a struggle in the beginning but slowly, he recovered… at least physically.

One evening, you were sitting on the couch, watching one of your favourite films when you noticed Matt standing in the corner, lost in his thoughts. “What happened, babe? You alright?” You rushed to him and to your surprise he jerked your hands off him. That had never happened before.

“I think we should take a break.”

“What?” To say you were shocked would be an understatement. You didn't know what came over him suddenly.

“Yes, [Y/N]… we should.” He sounded serious.

“But, at this point? I don't understand Matt. What happened?”

“Because I can't give you a normal life, [Y/N]. Why is it so difficult for you to understand that? You were sitting there, all peacefully, watching a move. We couldn't do that together, or anything normal couples do. How many times we had to cancel our plans because of me being daredevil and trying to save the city. You don't need to go through all of this. You deserve better, [Y/N].” He breathed hard after his confession, sightless eyes following where your figure should be.

“Leave it to me to decide what and who I deserve. I love you, Matt. I know that I never said it before, I didn't want to push you away. I don't want ‘normal’, I just want you.” By the end of it, you had wrapped your arms around his neck and forced him to sit down. It was one of the few raw moments you shared.

“I'm sorry.” He said after a few minutes of silence. “Promise me, you won't do anything stupid like this again.” You asked, gently massaging his scalp. Matt just nodded his head. You knew that you had a long road ahead of you but you were satisfied with the journey. In the end it's just you two, together.

THE END.

[fruitcoops]

hiii i've just spent the last 36-48 hours reading your works and oh dear do i lOVE your writing and this universe :') . i dont know if you are taking requests but i think it would be kinda interesting (and low key hilarious) if you would write the lions reacting/reading thirst tweets? idk if this is a dumb idea or not but just like some of them reacting to them and going "well i'm actually gay/married so.. no!.. but thank you!"

Part two of the six-month celebration, everyone! Thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who submitted comments--I had over 60 come in, and while I couldn’t include them all, reading them was a true joy. The Lion Pride channel was something I started writing on a whim; I never expected it to grow like this <3 Much love to all of you!

TW for alcohol mentions and thirst tweets (nothing explicit)

“Why do I always fear for my life around you?” Sirius asked as Marlene settled into a cushy chair to the side of their table.

She smiled, catlike, and crossed her legs primly. “Because only Finn appreciates me.”

“That’s just the Aries connection, Cap,” Finn said with a smug grin.

“We’re both Leos, Harzy.”

“Eh, close enough.”

Remus raised an eyebrow at her. “You should probably start asking questions before this devolves further, Marley. He’s gonna keep digging himself a hole and we won’t get anything done.”

Marlene’s smile returned with a vengeance. “That’s where you’re wrong, Loops! We’re not doing any questions at all today.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Read it and weep.” She tossed a small posterboard at him like a frisbee; he caught it, barely, though both Talker and Sirius had to duck out of the way. Marlene faced the camera and winked. “Welcome back to Lion Pride, everyone! Today I’m here with Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter, Thomas Walker, and our wonderful cubs to react to your comments on our videos!”

“Bet you thought we’d never see ‘em, huh?” James asked.

“The comments fall into four categories: thirsty, funny, mean, and sweet. I will be reading two of those groups, and my lovely fiancée will be reading the others because she is the human embodiment of sunshine.”

“If you make Dorcas read the mean ones, I’ll be sad,” Leo laughed.

Marlene gave him a look of disbelief. “You think I’m passing up a chance to roast you guys? Puh-lease. We’re starting off strong with some thirsty, thirsty comments! Loops, you’re up first.”

“This is going to be fun,” Sirius said, leaning back in his chair.

She cleared her throat, then turned a smoldering look on their table. “I didn’t know I had a freckle kink, but then Remus Lupin appeared and now here we are.”

“Oh, shit,” Remus muttered, covering his face with his hands as the others howled with laughter.

“Lupin has been looking sexy as hell on the bench for years now. I'm so glad people are simping over him like he deserves,” Marlene read. “And there’s a little heart emoji, just for you.”

“This is every one of my nightmares come to life,” Remus said, though his voice was muffled by his forearms.

James lifted his glasses to swipe away the tears of mirth that had gathered in his eyes. “Are you kidding? This is everything I have ever wanted.”

“Y’know, it is so good to see people drooling over this hot piece of ass at last,” Finn sighed, reaching over to ruffle Remus’ hair as his face turned bright red.

“One more, and it’s a good one,” Marlene warned. She licked her lips, then had to take a moment to laugh before speaking. “I feel like Remus Lupin is the type of guy to bake you muffins—”

“Accurate,” Leo said.

“—but is also a kinky motherfucker.”

Remus’ mouth dropped open as the table erupted into cheering. Logan pumped both fists in the air and Sirius was laughing so hard no sound came out; Talker sank so low in his chair that only his head and shoulders were visible as he applauded.

“Why do people comment these things?” Remus asked, barely above a whisper. “Holy fuck, I’m engaged!”

“Speaking of…” Marlene raised her eyebrows and Sirius smile drooped.

“Oh, no.”

“Oh, yes. Buckle up, Cap!” She rolled her shoulders out. “Get someone who looks at you the way Sirius Black looks at a hockey puck.”

Remus snorted; James’ laugh was so short and sharp that it set everyone else off as well. “That sounds like I have a hockey puck fetish!” Sirius complained. “Which is so, so not true!”

Finn made an ‘ehh’ noise, and he leaned around Remus to smack the back of his head. “Hey!”

“Next one!” Marlene announced. “Sirius Black was my bi awakening.”

A beat of silence passed. “Is that it?” Sirius ventured, looking nervous.

“Yep.”

“Aw, man, that one’s lame,” Talker said, shaking his head. “Everyone thinks Cap is a little hot.”

Remus shot him a look. “A little?”

“Fair. Marley, I dare you to find one person who wouldn’t tap that.”

She rolled her eyes. “Me, though that dovetails nicely into the last one for our lovely captain. Ahem. I understand why Remus is with Sirius: he's hot as hell and rich, I'd hit that too.”

“Oh, fuck, you’re right,” Leo gasped. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

Finn and Logan turned to him in unison with a mix of disbelief and offense written all over their faces. “Dude.”

“First of all, Leo, you found yourself two hot rich boys,” Remus interrupted. “Second, that comment is forgetting that he’s funny, and smart, and nice, and—”

Seconds after the initial cover, Sirius took his hand off Remus’ mouth as if he’d been burned. “Did you just lick me?”

“Moving on! This is in all caps, so be prepared.” Marlene shuffled through her posterboards and turned to Leo with an ominous smile. He glanced toward the camera in mild fear. “What does a person have to do to get some hockey player ass?! Like why is Leo Knut so fine?!”

“Amen!” Logan called as Leo blushed.

“According to six of the seven people at this table, the answer to that first question is to be a hockey player,” Talker laughed. “The world may never know the answer to the second, sadly.”

“Lily could play hockey,” James said, resting his chin on his hand. Every single one of the others rolled their eyes. “She could! She’d be so good at it, too.”

“We know,” Finn groaned. “You only mention it every other day.”

“Speaking of the lovely Mrs. Potter,” Marlene began with a sly look as she held up a new card. “Do James and Lily Potter need a third? Asking for me specifically.”

James paused, dumbstruck, while the others drummed their hands on the table. “…no?”

A general sigh of disappointment went up. “I was really hoping he’d say yes,” Leo said.

“Ask Lily next time,” Remus recommended.

James turned to him and blinked slowly. “What are you insinuating, Loops?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“Don’t worry, James, you’ll like this one,” Marlene assured him. “James Potter is the ultimate dilf.”

“You’re damn right I am!” James whooped. “Vindication, bitches!”

“Marley, what have you done?” Talker whispered. “He’ll never shut up about that, now.”

“Oh, never,” James all but cackled. “I’m officially a dilf, you guys!”

“I hate you,” Sirius groaned.

“Tremzy, are you ready? We’ve got a couple very special ones for you,” Marlene said.

“Anything to get us out of this hell,” Logan begged.

“In that case: Logan Tremblay’s ass is better than Sidney Crosby’s. I said what I said.”

A pleased flush rose to his cheeks as Finn and Leo high-fived over his head. “Really? Thank you!”

“And they would be correct!” Finn announced. “Best ass in the league.”

“Come on,” Remus scoffed, though he was smiling.

Marlene cleared her throat to get their attention. “I don’t think I can legally read this on air without being censored or getting the video taken down, but…”

She turned the board around; all seven of them leaned forward to read it, then slowly looked at Logan, who turned vivid red. “Mon dieu. Is that—someone commented that on a video? Like, for people to see?”

“I feel like I need to bleach my eyes,” Sirius said just as Finn began shaking with silent laughter.

Leo’s face fell. “You wrote that, didn’t you?”

“I did,” Finn wheezed, scooting forward to fist-bump Marlene. “We wanted to see what you guys would say. Fuckin’ hell, your faces.”

“Alright, Talkie, are you ready?” Marlene asked around her laughter. “Seeing Thomas Walker with a baby makes me want to have his babies…please hit me up.”

He held up his index finger and took a second to laugh before responding. “If that’s Noelle, yes. If that’s anyone else, I’m flattered, but absolutely not.”

Logan made a face. “Ew.”

“We have two more,” Marlene warned. “For some very special people that aren’t here today, but I think you’ll like them anyway.”

Sirius narrowed his eyes. “I don’t trust the look on your face.”

“Daddy Dumo makes me swoon.”

A muddle of horrified noises echoed through the studio as all seven of them cringed. “Oh, my god, that’s my dad!” Logan yelped, covering his ears. Sirius looked vaguely ill and Remus’ shoulders crept toward his ears; James shuddered.

“The worst part is, we all know he can get it,” Finn said with a grimace. “God, I feel like I just heard someone talking about my parents having sex.”

“I’m sure he’ll love to hear that,” Marlene laughed. “Last one, from one of our truth or drinks.”

Remus went pale half a second too late. “N—”

“Hope Lupin is a milf.”

A broken noise escaped his mouth and he clamped his hand over it while Talker rubbed his back in sympathy. Sirius shook his head. “Somehow, that’s worse than Dumo’s.”

“Whoever sent that in, show some respect!” Leo said indignantly as Remus bonked his forehead against the table. “Hope Lupin is a lovely woman!”

“I think they noticed that particular fact,” Marlene pointed out, earning herself several scandalized shouts of her name and a whine from Remus. “That’s all we have for thirst comments! Are you ready for some funny ones?”

“Anything,” Remus pleaded. “I am begging you, anything else.”

Marlene shook her head as she stood, still smiling, and kissed Dorcas on the cheek when she entered the frame. “Go for it, love.”

“Dorcas!” they all cheered, lighting up immediately.

“Hey, guys, it’s been a while!” She curled up in Marlene’s vacant spot and took her own posterboards out from underneath the seat. “Alright, let’s rock and roll. Pascal Dumais is the team dad and nothing will change my mind, and Tremzy is the annoying youngest child.”

“That is so accurate,” Sirius laughed, leaning just out of range of Logan’s playful punch. “Whoever commented that has no idea how right they are.”

“We’ve got a whole sibling dynamic thing going on,” Talker agreed. “Tremzy’s the baby of the family, Cap is the quietly chaotic middle child, and Pots is the older brother that starts shit and inevitably gets blamed for however out-of-control it gets.”

Dorcas nodded. “You are one hundred percent correct. In a similar vein: Pots was the dad jokes friend before he was even a dad.”

“Painfully so,” Leo confirmed, shaking his head as they all groaned in agreement. James looked rather smug about the whole thing. “So many puns.”

“Oh, you’ll like this one,” Dorcas mused as she drew a new card. “If Tremzy looked directly into my eyes for even two seconds, all of my problems would be solved. I am sure of it.”

“Yes,” Finn and Leo said in unison.

“It’s something about the eyes, I think,” James added. “They just stand out so much that it’s a little startling straight-on.”

Logan looked to the camera and stared at it, unblinking; it zoomed in slightly on his face. “Everything will be fine,” he said with mock solemnity. “Your problems are solved.”

“Well, that was terrifying,” Sirius said drily. “Got any more for us, Ms. Meadowes?”

“Of course I do! We’ve got quite a few for Loops and Leo.” She took a sip of her water before getting comfortable again. “My favorite thing about these videos is that we can all see Loops get steadily buffer as the season goes on. Good for you, king!”

“Flex! Flex! Flex!” the six of them chanted; Remus rolled his eyes, but slid his sweater sleeve to his elbow and flexed his forearm, resulting in enough hoots and hollers that they could probably be heard a block away. Talker fake-swooned into Leo’s arms and Remus lightly whacked him on the shoulder.

“Remus Lupin looks like he has squishable cheeks,” Dorcas read aloud.

“He does!” James cooed, scooting over and reaching out.

Remus narrowed his eyes. “I swear to god I’ll bite you.”

Sirius cupped his face between his palms and kissed his nose, then pinched both his cheeks gently. “Ta-da!”

“How many of these do we have?” Remus asked, though his voice was a bit muffled by Sirius’ hands.

“Just one more for you, and it’s my personal favorite.” Dorcas assured him. “I love how the team probably had no impulse control until Loops joined.”

Sirius let go of his face and dissolved into laughter as Finn nearly fell on the floor. “Oh my—you think he has impulse control?” Talker slapped the edge of the table as he shook his head. “Absolutely not. Hell no, Loops is the first person to do stupid shit with us.”

“Yeah, I just don’t get caught,” Remus added around his own laughter. “Everyone thinks I’m such a hardass goody-two-shoes and it lets me get away with so much more than you delinquents.”

“Speaking of delinquents,” Dorcas continued. “This one is from our ‘Taste Testing Sexy Alcohol’ video: ah, yes, now I know how to do a body shot. 10/10, very educational video.”

“Do not take educational advice from us,” Finn blurted instantly. “I know this is a joke, but please exercise caution. That video was a ton of fun but a nightmare to recover from.”

Sirius winced at the memory. “I took two naps and then wished for death for a full day.”

“On a lighter note, who’s ready for some Knutty appreciation?” Dorcas smiled at her cards. “I've only had Leo Knut for a season and half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.”

“Big mood,” four of them said simultaneously.

Leo turned to the camera with a concerned look on his face. “That’s a meme reference, but are y’all okay?”

“No,” Dorcas answered. “Especially not this next person: Sometimes I do something productive and then I remember @LeoKnut is a 19 year old professional athlete who radiates happiness and with two of the hottest boyfriends the good lord has made, and then my bowl of packaged ramen seems less impressive.”

“I’m proud of your ramen,” Leo said, even as the corners of his mouth twitched in a smile. “And I appreciate the note about my boyfriends, because they are definitely the hottest people the good lord has made.”

Talker stuck his lip out in a pout. “Rude.”

“Sorry, Talkie, I’m biased.”

“Last one before Marlene comes back, so you’d better enjoy it!” Dorcas announced. “Did the Lions effectively utilize girl power when they wrecked toxic masculinity, yes or yes?”

“Can we utilize girl power?” Remus wondered, resting his shin on his hand. “Isn’t that exclusively for, y’know, women?”

“We can utilize himbo power,” Finn suggested.

James gave him an offended look. “Not all of us are himbos!”

“Okay, but you definitely are.”

“I am not!” James held up his fingers to count. “There are only, like, three qualifications, right? I might be strong, hot, and respectful, but I’m not dumb so it doesn’t count!”

“Pots,” Remus said quietly, hiding his smile for half a second. “Buddy, that was four things.”

James paused, then sighed in resignation. “Ah, fuck, I’m a himbo.”

“You really are.”

“At least we don’t promote toxic masculinity.”

They raised their waterbottles in a ‘cheers’ motion as Marlene and Dorcas switched spots; Marlene stretched her arms over her head and grabbed the new boards. “I’m back, beloved himbos. Talker, Leo, you are beloved by the people and have no mean comments. Cap, we’re starting with you.”

“Are they actually mean mean?” he asked.

“Sirius Black seems like a little bitch. Not in a bad way, necessarily. He just. Seems like he'd be a little bitch."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. “Oh, okay. That answers one question.”

“He’s not a little bitch,” Leo said. “Pouty on occasion, but not a little bitch.”

Remus gave him a long look, then shook his head. “Yeah, I mean, you teared up a little when Hattie got a splinter in her paw but didn’t even yell when you almost sliced your finger off while making dinner.”

“Duality of man,” Finn said sagely.

Marlene cocked an eyebrow. “Finn O’Hara’s hair kind of reminds me of Garfield the Cat.”

“Alright, that’s just rude.”

“It does not!” Logan gasped at the same time Leo made a noise of agreement.

Finn turned to him in utter betrayal. “Nutter Butter, I thought you liked my hair!”

“I do!” Leo defended. “But they’re not entirely wrong. It’s very orange in the sun.”

“I’m never going to forget that,” Finn muttered, staring at the floor.

“Ugh, it bothers me so much that Lupin just objectifies Black all the time!” Marlene read in a high-pitched, nasal voice. “No respect in that relationship!”

Sirius raised his eyebrows. “Pardon?”

Marlene stared at it for a moment, then shrugged. “Yeah, I have no idea what videos they were watching. Do you feel objectified in your relationship, Cap? I know the opinion of total strangers really bothers you a lot.”

“I’m really glad you picked up on that,” he said with false gravity. “Yeah, it’s such a bummer when my hot fiancé says I look nice. Such a blow to my self-esteem.”

“That was supposed to be a roast against me,” Remus said, looking amused. “Talk about backfiring.”

“Are you ready, Pots? This one’s pretty brutal,” Marlene warned. James nodded and Finn linked their hands for moral support. “James Potter is a swiftie and you cannot tell me otherwise.”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “…yeah? That’s true? T Swift is a regular occurrence on the locker room playlist.”

“Also, James Potter looks like someone who would think black pepper was spicy.”

“Now that one is mean,” he complained as the others burst out laughing.  “It’s not my fault I have sensitive taste buds!”

“Oh, honey,” she said under her breath as she took a new card. “Get ready, Tremzy. This first one is short and sweet: Logan Tremblay looks like a lesbian.”

“That is not an insult,” Logan laughed. “Every lesbian I know is rad as fuck. I wish I looked that good in a leather jacket.”

“I just realized Logan doesn’t look short cause he’s next to bunch of hockey players, he’s short cause he’s 5’9.”

The smile slipped off his face in a millisecond as the others roared with laughter. “Quoi?”

“Oh, she got you good,” Sirius gasped, patting his shoulder clumsily. “Holy fuck, can I frame that?”

“That’s not what it says.” An edge of distress appeared in Logan’s voice. “Marley, that’s not what it says.”

James sat on the floor with the heels of his palms pressed against his eyes. “You’re fucking—whoever sent that in, you are my new favorite person. Jesus.”

“Do you need a second to recover before we move on?” Dorcas asked as she draped her arms over the back of Marlene’s chair. “The next one is our biggest section by far.”

“It’s the sweet ones, yeah?” Leo asked.

“Right.”

“It might be a good idea to do those before Lo spontaneously combusts.”

“Agreed!” She swapped with Marlene and hauled a short stack of posterboards out from their hiding place with a smile. “A hug from Dumo can probably solve any issue.”

“Facts,” Logan said. “I could really use one right about now, too.”

“Has anyone noticed how blue Leo Knut’s eyes are?”

“Yes,” the six of them chorused.

Finn gave him a dreamy look. “Every single day.”

“When I first read this one, I thought I wrote it,” Dorcas said with a snort. “Someone give Marlene a raise. No reason why, I just love her.”

“Can we do that?” Sirius asked, looking toward the camera crew. “Can we lobby to give you guys raises? Because you definitely deserve it after all the bullshit you deal with to make these videos watchable, and Marlene, you’ve drawn the short end of the stick ninety percent of the time.”

“How?” she called off-screen.

“You have to actually talk to us and try to get answers.”

“Fair.”

Dorcas finished scribbling something down on her notepad. “Just making a note of this conversation for future reference. Moving on! Sirius Black and James Potter are a prime example of hockey husbands, and I adore them.”

“The ironic part of that is that we’re both in committed relationships, but we’re basically married,” James mused.

Remus shook his head. “You guys are so married. Lily wanted to get you matching rings for your birthday, Pots.”

“That would be so cool!” they said in perfect unison. Remus turned to the camera and spread his hands in a case in point motion.

Dorcas stifled her laughter before moving on. “This one is cute. Give Remus Lupin all the hugs! I feel like I could tell him he’s an inspiration and he’d be so nice about it—” She paused to glance up at them. “—this next bit is in parentheses: all the LGBT Lions give me that vibe, but Cap and Knutty are super intimidating so I wouldn’t have the guts.”

Leo’s face fell and Sirius’ eyebrows pitched. “I’m not intimidating!” Leo protested. “I thought we already went over that! Loops gives fantastic hugs, but I want some, too.”

“He definitely deserves all the hugs in the world, but I promise I’m nice,” Sirius said, a bit softer than usual. “Is it because we’re tall?”

Dorcas half-shrugged. “Probably. It’s a little startling at first. Oh, I could’ve written this one, too: The Venn diagram of men I trust and the Gryffindor Lions is a full circle.”

Talker beamed at the camera. “Thank you!”

“So many hockey guys are such douchebags,” Logan said with a shake of his head. “I’m really glad we don’t do that shit.”

“Me, too.” Dorcas slid her old card under her chair. “Sirius Black’s hair looks so soft and I just want to touch it so bad.”

“It is so soft,” Remus agreed immediately. “You have no idea.”

“Everyone wants to touch Cap’s hair,” Finn said, sighing. “It’s so majestic.”

“I need a haircut.”

“No, you don’t,” Remus said as he tugged a stray curl. Sirius hummed.

“This one is from the interview some you did with Jules and Katie: these hockey boys being so soft with kids is my aesthetic! Like, it’s just so adorable to see these big, intimidating dudes be so, so sweet! Love them all!” She turned the card for them to see. “And then they added a heart at the end.”

“It’s impossible to be around those kids and not be happy,” James said. “They’re just too cute and wonderful.”

“Yeah, I love kids.” Finn nodded. “Especially the Dumais and Jules. They’re a hoot.”

“Jules would die if he heard you say that,” Remus laughed. “The hero worship is still going strong with most of you.”

“This one made me laugh when I first read it, but it’s really sweet,” Dorcas informed them. “Anyone else feel like we were deceived these past five years into thinking Cap was this hard-ass man, when in reality he's a cuddle bug who definitely captures and releases spiders instead of squishing them?”

“You weren’t deceived, I was just closeted,” Sirius said. “Also, I absolutely squish spiders.”

Remus gave him a look. “No, you do not. That’s my job. I’m the catch and release person if I can get away with it.”

James shook his head. “The third week of practices you saw a spider and threw me at it.”

“You did what?” Finn asked.

“There was a spider in my stall,” Sirius sighed, looking as if he would rather be anywhere else. “And Pots and I were talking so I didn’t see it until I almost sat on it, and my brain decided the only logical thing to do would be to grab him and shove him toward the spider.”

“That was after you shrieked,” Talker added. “Like, literally shrieked. I’ve never heard anyone make a noise like that.”

“Alright, alright,” Sirius grumbled. “We get it, I don’t like spiders.”

Remus shrugged. “But you are a cuddle bug. They got that part right.”

“We’re in the final two!” Dorcas announced. “This one has some pictures to go with it, so it’s on my phone. Fuck Romeo and Juliet, I want what these bitches have.”

“It’s us!” Leo cooed as the phone made its way down the line. In the upper corner of the screen, the photo appeared—it had been taken in New York, and Logan’s whole face was alight with happiness as Leo and Finn each pressed a kiss to his cheek. The camera caught him mid-laugh, so his eyes were closed and his chin was tucked slightly into Finn’s Strand hoodie.

“That’s my screensaver,” Finn said with a grin, pulling his phone out and turning it toward the camera without moving away from Leo. “One of my favorites.”

“I forgot you took that one,” Logan murmured. He hooked his chin over Leo’s shoulder and kissed his cheek; the four others at the table gave soft are you seeing this? looks to the camera and Dorcas smiled.

“Pots, I think yours is next. I hate to break it to you, Talkie, but they didn’t get any of you and Noelle.”

“We don’t take a ton of pictures together,” Talker said as James took the phone. “I mean, we take a bunch of selfies, but we don’t live close enough to each other to actually post that often. What picture is it, J?”

James was staring down at the picture with an unbearably sweet expression. “It’s our wedding. That’s my favorite one, actually.”

Like Logan, they had been captured while laughing—Lily was bent slightly at the waist as James clapped, his glasses just as askew as the flower crown on her head. It was impossible to tell who had told the joke originally, but they were both radiant in the sunset.

“That’s a really good one,” Sirius said with an unreadable look on his face.

“Well, well, well, fancypants, you two got a video.” James wiggled his eyebrows and Remus leaned in to see.

“What kind of video? One of our tikt—oh. Oh, this is so cute.” He shifted his chair over as the short edit began to play. “D, who made this?”

“A fan.”

“It’s really impressive,” Sirius said without taking his eyes off the screen. The edit was a series of photos, both on and off the ice; Sirius knocking their helmets together, then Remus looking back over his shoulder, then both of them in the water playing chicken in the sun. It was a slideshow of their life and their love.

“Can you send that to me?” Remus asked when it was over. “Cause that’s super cool.”

“Sure thing. Are you guys ready for the last one?” When they all nodded, she drummed her fingers on the posterboard and cleared her throat. “Arthur appreciation hours. He deserves it after managing to control the team.”

A cheer went up—all seven stood and applauded, half-laughing and half-whooping. “Miracle worker!” Sirius called.

“Best coach in the league!” Finn added.

“Most tolerant man to ever walk the earth!” Remus raised his water in a toast and they tapped the plastic edges together, nearly spilling all over the table.

Dorcas’ eyes crinkled in a smile as she turned to the camera. “That’s it for today, Lions! Tune in next time for more content of our boys, and thank you for such wonderful comments!”

[like-rain-or-confetti]

I love your work! I dont think there is enough Vladimir/ofc out there and you capture him perfectly. I saw you did some related to tik toks, can you do one where reader shows the Romanians and Volturi males how tampons work. I saw some ti k toks and the guys reaction went from cringe to lol. I just wanna see the ancients freak out. 😂

The Romanians

Vladimir: "Alright, do you know what this is?" You asked and Vladimir nodded. "Yes." "Okay so you know how I put it in?" "No." "Oh this will be fun!" You said cheerfully. "Will it?" Vladimir cracked a smile of amusement. "We push this for momentum." Vladimir looked taken aback however the smile remained upon his face. "Oh is that so? Momentum? Push it in there about forty miles per hour do you?" He asked and you giggled. "Okay so the bottle is my 'hooha'." "Hoohaaaaa..." Vladimir repeated with a slow nod and a smile. "Stop! This is serious!" You cried out through laughs. "I'm listening! You push that thing in at about forty miles per hour into your hooha for momentum, okay next." You doubled over immediately in laughter. Even Vladimir was struggling to contain his own laughter. "Okay, then you push this part and-" "and it's getting bigger. That's...that's big." Vladimir nodded, eyes widened slightly. "So now that you've ripped yourself open, now what?" You burst out laughing again. Vladimir picked it up by the string, pulling it out if the bottle. "oh my- ce naiba fac oamenii acum?" (what in the hell are humans doing now?)"I-its not like that!" You laughed behind your hand. "Yes it is, you're telling me that doesn't do you damage being in there for hours?" You couldn't stop laughing to even give him an answer.

Stefan: "Want to see how they work?" You asked. Stefan contemplated it. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt." One tampon and a water bottle later, you unwrapped the tampon. "Okay the top here of the bottle is my..." "Yes, yes, the fun area. Go on. Continue." Stefan bent down slightly to get a better look. You couldn't help but giggle quietly to yourself. "So with the one, I have to pull it until it clicks." Just as you said, the tampon clicked. Stefan hummed. "Well isn't this just fine technology. Go ahead, tell me more. I'm invested now." He smiled. "So I insert it until here, the thinner part." Stefan hummed. "Then I push down." You did and the cotton immediately began to expand. Stefan bit his bottom lip. "Oh dear. That's... wait if it gets that size how are you going to get it back out?" "I pull it out." You said simply as you did so. Stefan gasped at the struggle to pass the cotton through the neck of the bottle. "Doesn't that hurt?" He asked. "I'd describe it like pulling a balloon out of you." Stefan didn't seem to like that much. He took a hold of your hips, bending down before planting a kiss to your stomach. "Are you okay, little one?" "Did...did you ask me or my uterus if I was okay?" You asked with slight confusion.

"and then you give it to your vampire boyfriend for a snack."

The Volturi

Aro: "Alright, so, you've seen me with these before haven't you?" You began holding up the packaged tampon. "For your menstruation cycle, yes." Aro said smoothly. A hand moving to your lower back. You nodded. "Does your gift let you see how they work?" "Not entirely, only your thoughts of them my dear." Aro answered. "Well, I was hoping I could give you a demonstration." You smiled at him. Aro nodded. "Go ahead, my dear." You unwrapped it and pushed down, setting the cotton free. "So pretend this water bottle is my...you know." Aro nodded. Without a word, you dropped the cotton into the water and almost immediately it expanded. Aro hummed in surprise. "Modern technology never ceases to be a surprise." He said. "So obviously this isn't the exact shape but I think you get the point, it expands in me. So that there isn't a leak and then after about 6 hours..." You trailed off, slowly pulling at the string. "Is this where you find it uncomfortable at times, cara mia?" You nodded. "yeah because whilst this is already sometimes unpleasant, sometimes it's a lighter flow and so then at times I can be pulling out dry cotton." You winced and Aro nodded, clearly full of sympathy.

Marcus: Marcus was probably the least chill about it. Like this man just watched silently, no freak outs no nothing. You were actually very confused at how calm he actually was. "Don't let Aro see those. He'll be very intrigued." You snorted at that. Sounds like Aro. "What do you think?" Marcus paused. "...I will admit I didn't expect it to expand to that size but I didn't think it appropriate to make a comment incase you were uncomfortable." You didn't anticipate such an answer but omg it was so precious. He simply smiles at you as you heart eye him.

Caius: "No! I have a mate that requires my attention and I want their attention more than yours!" Caius called out before closing the bathroom door behind him. "Hello, my love. Why are we in here?" Caius asked before kissing your cheek. "Would you like a science lesson?" "What would the lesson be about?" He asked. You help up a wrapped tampon. "Seen these before?" "No." He answered. "Also the question is 'have I seen these before?'. "This is a science lesson, not a English lesson." You smirked playfully and he gave you his own small smirk. "So I use these when I'm on my period." You began as you unwrapped it. "How is that supposed to help anything?" Caius furrowed his brown in confusion at the contraption. "We're going to pretend this is my uterus and the top of the bottle is my...you know." "I most certainly do." Caius grinned. "Inappropriate, this is educational." "Why of course, my love. Please continue." Caius said slightly smug. "So see this thicker bit? This goes in my... y'know." You pushed the thicker part of the tampon past the opening of the bottle. Caius slowly turned his head towards you with a raised eyebrow looking very unimpressed. "Until my fingers on the outside blocks it from going any further." You did a double take on Caius' expression. "I hope you don't enjoy putting them in there." Caius said. You gave him an unimpressed look. "Believe it or not darling, not everything that gets put up there feels good and if it helps you, this is one of them that doesn't feel good." "I figured, my love. I'm just teasing. You're blushing." Caius said kissing your cheek again, now wrapping his arms around you. "I am perfectly aware of the conditions required for that kind of pleasure. Thank you, love. I am not an idiot." You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the heat in your cheeks. "You push this part and-" Caius inhaled sharply when the cotton freed itself as well as expanded by the second within the water bottle. You giggled at his wide eyed expression. "I'm going to be honest with you, my love. That is unholy." None of us expected the teasing yet here we are. Caius has jokes even when shook 😂 Suddenly he's huffing with a scowl. "I AM ON MY WAY. If this is something ridiculous there will be consequences Jane!" He turns to you with a loving smile. "I must go, my love. Thank you for the science lesson." With another kiss to your jaw, he's gone.

Alec: Alec was immediately frowning at the tampon before you had even unwrapped it. A common theme for Alec when he was trying to understand something. "You've seen me with these before right?" Alec made a noise of confirmation, although his expression didn't change. "...you know you can come closer, it won't hurt you." You said, unable to overlook the distance he had created between himself and the counter with the water bottle and tampon. Alec moved closer silently. You unwrapped the tampon. "So these come in different sizes, there are ones bigger than this for a heavier period. These are ones I'd use when I have a lighter flow." "The top looks rather intrusive." Alec said. "I won't lie to you, it is but it's not as bad as you think. It's not like agonizing pain or anything like that." You assured him. "This thicker part is the part that's going into my...entrance. Let's just say that." You placed the the top half of the tampon into the bottle. "Some of these have a mechanism where you pull this part so that it clicks but this one doesn't sound stop when my fingers touch my private area and push this part." You pushed down and the cotton came free, the plastic coming off. You removed the plastic completely and Alec inhaled sharply, watching as the cotton expanded. "It will expand to my shape and stops any leaks." "What about the string?" Alec asked. "That stays out of me...or I'm not getting it back out." You smiled slightly at him. "After some hours it gets uncomfortable and can build up some serious harmful bacteria. So it's important I change it." You pulled it out and Alec grimaced. "Does Jane know of these?" He asked. You paused. "Does Jane get a period?" Alec shook his head. "Likely not then and they most certainly weren't a thing when you were human."

Demetri: "So you get what the bottle is representing right?" You asked. "Yes." Demetri nodded. "Good. So this goes in to about here." You explained putting the tampon into the bottle. "My fingers will only let me go so far so it's self explanatory how far it goes in." Demetri nodded. "I see." "Then I push down on this part." His eyes widened as the cotton suddenly expanded. "O-OH!" You giggled at his deer in headlights expression. "Oh that is painful. That cannot be painless. That's-!? It expands in there?" He looked at you incredulously, nodding to your stomach. You nodded with a small smile. "Why are you smiling!? This is awful! How would you even get that back out!? Wouldn't this string break!?" "Let me show you." You said hurriedly with a smile. Slowly, you pulled the tampon back out the bottle. The cotton contorted. "Oh! Oh! Oh you poor thing! Oh I was blessed! Oh I was lucky! Oh no! Oh no! Oh, you poor thing! Your poor- oh no, no, no, no." Demetri covered his face with his hands when it finally came out. This poor guy might be traumatized. "I need to change you. I need to change you soon. I just- I can't believe you go through that every month, multiple times. You dont even look bothered!" Demetri said to you. You shrugged lightly. "It's nothing too serious. Sometimes it's uncomfortable but I wouldn't say it was anything like torture." He has a whole other level of respect for you. He wouldn't even dare repeat why, instead only wincing. You're a badass, that's all Felix needs to know.

Felix: Felix was mostly silent, other than the faces he made of horror. In fact, you found his reaction so funny, you couldn't help but take it one step further. "So then you pull it out, don't yank it and you can only keep one of these in for four to six hours. Eight at the very most or you'll die." "I'm sorry, go into that part?" "Toxic Shock Syndrome." You replied with ease. Felix looked perplexed. "It's rare but what will happen each time is that the bacteria will produce toxins that can enter my blood stream through my uterus lining." Felix didn't like that. He didn't like that at all. It was clear upon his face. "Were you exaggerating when you said you'd die?" Slowly you shook your head. "Nope." You continued. "It can be fatal and requires medical intervention immediately." "And you do this everytime your on your period, multiple times!? Playing with fire!?" Felix was almost screeching but you nodded simply as you began to pull it out of the bottle. "Oh no, that isn't coming out. That'll stay in there." Felix said eyes wide at the rim of the bottle. "No, it will." You answered before pulling at the string. Slowly but surely, the cotton of the tampon contorted, reshaping into the confounds of the bottle. Felix's jaw dropped and that's what happens when you pull it out of..." Felix trailed off nodding to your stomach. You nodded. "It must be a relief." He commented. You weren't so sure. "Not really, it's uncomfortable when it's full like this but pulling it out isn't much better." "This is awful. I hate every second of this." Felix groaned. That was when the idea had come to you. "Alright, this is the important part." You told him, successfully hiding your smile. "There's more!?" He gawked. "Yes, because after that, I have to suck the blood out of this to replenish myself." "Excuse me!?" Felix jolted back and you immediately burst out laughing. "Felix..." "What did you just say to me!?" He cried out. "How else am I going to make up for the blood I've lost!?" "Demetri, get your ass in here!" Felix yelled. That was when you knew the joke was over. "Felix! I was kidding! It was a joke! I don't eat it, I just throw it away." You doubled over laughing. Not before Demetri got in there quicker than you could blink though. 🤷‍♀️

[chongoblog]

Zero Time Dilemma Review/Ramble

Okay, so if you’ve been following me, you know that I’ve gotten into the Zero Escape series, famous for 999 and Virtue’s Last Reward, streaming both games. I recently took the time to experience the last game, Zero Time Dilemma by watching cutscenes rather than playing it proper mostly because A) I heard it was REALLY dark and didnt want to risk it on Twitch and B) I wanted to experience it more freely like while I’m at work.

After experiencing it. I have......feelings about it. And because there’s MASSIVE spoilers involved, I’m making it its own post under the ReadMore below.

tl;dr LOADS of bullshit, flawed execution, and stupid decisions, but still REALLY enjoyed it

Okay so a LOT of this is going to be complaining, and like I said in the tl;dr I still legit enjoyed this game, so I’m gonna make this a compliment sandwich by saying something nice now, loading up on complaints, then ending with more compliments. Carlos is good. So is Sean. Sigma being voiced by Matthew Mercer actually makes him more interesting imo. I REALLY like Phi’s new design and the way they build on the initial concepts brought up in VLR more accurately portray the ideas that started all the way back in 999, that being the idea of taking thoughts across timelines, just like the player. From the beginning, the theme/gimmick was always “what if your character remembered information when you savescummed?” In 999 that began as flashes of information, and in VLR the characters’ consciousness actually time traveled at the very end. ZTD now uses the idea of the consciousness traveling across time and space and RUNS with it. I also think that Delta has a cool design.

I’ll be nice again later, but now for the things I Did Not Like.

Emo Moody Junpei makes sense from a writing standpoint, but that doesn’t mean I have to like him. Maybe I just got spoiled since Evan Wilson did a spectacular job with his deliveries in 999 and in ZTD it seems like his soul got sucked out. Not the fault of the delivery as much as it is the writing. Eric is bad, and I feel like that statement isn’t controversial. I don’t think anyone likes Eric, and if you do, then sorry for shitting on him so much, but god I just don’t like him. And the abusive childhood thing doesn’t give me a drop of sympathy, but then again I’ve always hated the writing trick that “this person is shitty and pathetic but it’s because abuse!” (see also Mikan). Diane is boring (sorry).

But I fuuuuuckin HATE Mira. I hate Mira so much. Like, at first I thought she’d be alright, yeah she’s definitely The Boob Character™, but I liked Lotus well enough and Alice grew on me significantly, so I don’t see why Mira won’t. Then she’s like “surprise I’m a serial killer”. Now if they just made her a serial killer, it would be kinda boring so I’m glad they TRIED something new. I just think the result was bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad. Like....”hmm I never felt any emotions so when my mom told me they were kept in hearts I just ripped em out of people :)” is some garbage I’d write in middle school when I felt especially edgy. Also yeah seems p ableist. I won’t go too deeper into Mira, since she’s a sociopath and I don’t know enough about the actual disorder to put a candle to the real thing, but....bleh.

I won’t touch on THIS aspect for too long because I’m aware that it had barely any budget and it wouldn’t have happened without a kickstarter (don’t know the details), but the animation is just....so stiff. It really takes away from the dramatic impact some scenes are meant to have. But even IF the animation wasn’t stiff, I still am not a big fan of the darker and moodier direction it went. Although that’s moreso down to personal preference. Final note about the presentation (which is by far the game’s weakest aspect) is that I noticed multiple points in the sound mixing got to nearly Sonic Adventure 2 levels of being unable to understand what people were saying.

Alright. Now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Let’s talk about Delta. This is going to make up a MAJORITY of this post so strap in.

Delta is a meme. There’s no other way to say it briefly. He’s just such a huge fucking meme. Almost everything about him, from his plan to his “complex” motives to his backstory to his powers. I mentioned liking his design, but fuck it. That’s a meme now too. Delta is the stupidest part of the game, and as much as I kind of love it, I also need to complain about it.

First let’s talk about Delta’s plan (because it starts with the nicest part of this segment). His motives are “complex” which is actually greek for “he’s probably either a liar, an idiot, or both”. I said there was nice things, so I’ll start with those. The very ending’s “ah ah ah. I never killed any of you in this timeline. If you arrested someone for crimes of another history, there would be criminals everywhere” was something I actually legitimately enjoyed. Yeah, intent was still there and he’s still a bastard (plus there was kidnapping and non-consensual drugging involved so kind of a stupid take), but I still thought it was a fun attempt. And also the “I had to make sure I was born” thing is a mindfuck, and I love those. Basically the first retort is “well I’m alive, right? So I don’t need to make sure I was born with powers because I WAS born with powers, which means it happened in another universe. So I don’t have to.” Only to then realize that we’re just in the universe where he DID do that but then the only justification is “someone had to” right? Wrong. Let’s talk about the rest of his “complex” motives

So I give a pass to “I had to make sure I was born”, but now we see why he had to do this whole deal and what he declares at the end of the game. That there’s some religious fanatic who intends to blow up the world and completely end humanity. And he released Radical-6 in the VLR timeline hoping that it would kill the terroris only killing 4 billion people instead of 6 billion people. In the timeline at the end of ZTD, he says that they had used this experience to hone the skills of the Shifters that way they could use their newly honed take down the religious fanatic WITHOUT Radical-6 and save the world.

What?

Now......before I tear into this.....I have ONE nice thing to say. The “unleash radical 6 and kill 4 billion vs let a terrorist end humanity” gambit IS cleverly foreshadowed with the radical 6 decision game with Q Team. But also wouldn’t that have made, like 1800 times more narrative sense to give that decision game to team D who KNOWS the impact of radical 6, or team C who he explains this plan to later on? Damn, even my nice thing was backhanded. Alright let’s REALLY tear into it.

FIRST of all, this is the exact same plot of Virtue’s Last Reward. Only difference is that somehow Akane and Junpei are just as skilled at this technique as Sigma and Phi despite the latter going to do Moon Training (granted the moon training was also to give them enough of a jump to go back 45 years). Speaking of Virtue’s Last Reward, this game also reveals that Delta is Brother, the leader of Free the Soul. A group of religious fanatics. So I wouldn’t be especially shocked if the religious fanatic is working with Free the Soul. But for the sake of this argument, let’s just say they aren’t with FtS. How in the Flavor-Blasted FUCK does he know this? Did somebody Shift back from that timeline and then just get Mind hacked (and we’ll fUCKING talk about Mind Hacking dont you worry)? How would that be the only piece of information known about the end of the god damn world? And if there IS more, then why the fuck wouldn’t you tell them the information? How does he know that it’s inevitable when apparently a god damn snail can unleash Radical-6?

I call bullshit on the “religious fanatic” thing. Wanna know why? Because at this point, Delta had already founded Free The Soul. He started this shit in 1938. At this point in time, he and the rest of the Free the Soul had already kidnapped Alice’s dad to create clones of his dead brother. He was pushing for a new world order and then in the VLR timeline, tried to PREVENT this whole thing from happening by sending Dio to the Moon. So if he actually gave a shit about “honing their abilities” then why would he do everything in his power to stop it? There is ONE out that there can be, but it’s something not even HINTED at (and I’ll talk about this later), but I think that "religious fanatic” is a big ol’ lie that he made up to try and save face when he was faced with a consequence, but even that explanation makes no sense since he’s like “lol shoot me if u wanna I wont mind hack you”

And let’s talk about mind hacking. Let’s fucking talk about Mind Hacking. Adding Mind Hacking was stupid, completely pointless, out of left field, and actively makes Delta a worse character. For those that don’t know, Mind Hacking is an ability that only Delta has (and I guess the player character technically but that’s a whole meta thing from VLR that doesn’t get followed up on) where you can read people’s minds and also fuckin control them. Why? Why was this necessary, ZTD? You wanna know what I thought was really neat? When I saw that different timelines produced different X-Codes. I thought “oh shit, I know this is Game Stuff, but the sheer foresight of the villain to do that? That’s some Moriarty shit.” It would require some insane explanations, but we’ve had enough sci-fi that we could imagine with enough advanced tech, you could set up systems that could use conditionals to give certain responses based on certain outcomes. Like if someone dies after the decontamination room button is pressed, then the central computer outputs a different X-Code than if it’s after the initial vote. Just make up a new tech that accounts for Shifting (plus the QUANTUM COMPUTER you have RIGHT THERE) and you could make a villain with so much calculated foresight that he’s just a god damn genius. But no. Mind hacking. None of that interesting stuff, just “lol I read ur mind idiot”. No outwitting anyone, just “lol get mindhacked eric u scrub bang bang”.

Honest to god, honest to FUCKING god, do you want to know how cool the final cutscene would have made Delta look if he walked out and just KNEW what happened in another timeline because of his plans. Like everyone recognizes him as Delta and he just goes “ohoho I see you had a fun time in my other timeline” using that deduction alone. But nah, he’s just like “yo I just mindhacked y’all, nice experience y’all had” I hate mind hacking so much. There’s no part of his plan where he NEEDED to mind hack in order to succeed that could have been written without mind hacking.

Now there’s a bit of a missed opportunity here that could both make mind hacking relevant, made his motive not shit, and also maybe even developed him into a SUPER interesting character! I know this is a bit fanfic-y, but hear me out. Make Delta a VICTIM of the stable time loop/bootstrap paradox. For those who don’t know, the bootstrap paradox is when time travel makes certain events happen seemingly out of thin air since they are their own cause. Basically it’s this clip from Milo Murphy. This is something that seems like it’s KINDA there in the subtext, but if they actually dove into it, they could have a GOLD mine.

What if we keep the mindhacking, and before he even MAKES Free the Soul, he mindhacks someone who experienced the events of the “religious fanatic”. But not just anyone. An experienced SHIFTer who made it their goal to stop this religious fanatic. After hundreds of attempts, they still fail. Delta sees this and determines it to be inevitable. So he’s having fun, cursed by the knowledge of an inevitable apocalypse. Then he meets Akane, Phi, Sigma, or Junpei after they had undergone the events of VLR and ZTD. He learns that particular timeline. A bleak future, yes, but one single future where humanity is alive. He sees two futures, one in which all of humanity dies, and one where he is the leader of a religious cult that wipes out 4 Billion People with a deadly pandemic. And the idea of being that person disgusts him. He despises it. But he’s completely resigned to fate. He knows that things must go precisely as he’s seen at the price of humanity, too frightened by such a burden to even take a toe off of the predetermined pathway. His motive is that he’s so tightly bound to fate and so afraid to let it slip that he has no choice but to commit the atrocities, despising himself for it every step of the way, but considering it better than the inevitable alternative. It would give a purpose for the mindhacking powers, it would give him a solid motive, and it would make the ending SO much stronger, showing the contrast between a group of SHIFTers confident that they can change fate and the man who is completely resigned to his own. Fuck, I might steal this character concept because I REALLY think this idea would work to make an interesting villain!

Like I mentioned, this is KINDA there in subtext (with him quite frequently saying “life truly is unfair”) and this could be an interpretation of the character, but if ZTD had explored that theme, then holy hell what an interesting character Delta would be.

But even WITH this fix, holy hell, this plan is stupid. Because guess what, dingus. You just created like 30 new timelines that all end in annihilation.

He coulda said ONE line about “even if there is only one history that ends nicely, that is solace enough”, that might have been dark, but still powerful. You know, add some depth. But instead, he’s just like “hmm hmm shoot me”

And the Q Twist? I’m honestly not as mad at it as I should be. On one hand, it does that cute thing where there are little bits of foreshadowing so when you rewatch it, you notice little bits like shadows and stuff, but on the other hand, there are PLENTY of points where either the camera just straight up lies to you and doesn’t show him when he should be there or Delta’s just been fuckin SHMOOVIN on his wheelchair around the room constantly to stay out of the camera and everyone’s just been kinda chill with it. Maybe if they had been more careful with the camera it could have delivered a TOUCH better. Like, even if the shots are a bit off, that’s noticeable enough to be part of the hint, no? I don’t have as much to say about this, mostly because this post is getting long as fuck so I’m gonna wrap it up so I can move on with my life for a bit.

So even with ALL OF THAT, I still enjoyed playing the game. That’s right, compliment sandwich time. The three wards all being one ward was a really neat reveal. The fact that you can shoot Delta in one scene is creative with its replay value. I’m glad they touched on the philosophical idea of what happens to the people who made it out from the coin flip only to get SHIFTed into the exploding lab, and exploring that idea was fun. I absolutely lost my mind at the idea of the gun to sigmas head had a random chance of firing and then seeing it elaborated on in the dice scene directly after it. Gab is a good boy.

Cant wait to play AI

[mxvladdy]

Good hell, your True Form series is the absolute best! (and totally canon for me tbh). I saw that we can drop you a prompt and I wanted to ask, if you can do one where the obey boys comfort an Mc who lost someone dear to them? It's totally alright if you dont want to! I hope you are having safe and healthy days!

Thankie anon! I hope you are well too! My condolences if you have lost someone ;.; I hope you like this and I’m stoked you like my True Form series!  

Diavolo

Loss is not a new concept to him. Like many on the student council, he is well versed in it. The emotional strain can be numbing, and was numbing to him at one point in his life. He can’t really remember it now though. When was the last time he actually felt grief over a fallen companion?

But humans are different. Time is a scant commodity to mortals. Lose could stick to a human for their entire lifetime. When you come to him he is distraught. He hates seeing you in any form of discomfort. The best he can offer you is his undivided attention and shoulder if you need it. He is actually full of comforting and wise words from all the lifetimes he has experienced.

If you need time topside he’ll arrange a portal for you and you just take all the time you need. His program is not more important than family in his eyes. If you would like him to accompany you then he shall gladly. Sends the biggest, yet most tasteful flower arrangement to the funeral home and to the gravestone.

Barbatos

Probably has the hardest time relating to such a concept. The finite idea of time is something he struggles to conceptualize. Unless he physically wipes someone from the planes of existence he can, to a certain extent, simply find them in another stream.

He knows not to offer or bring up that idea to you. You don’t ask him to either. His abilities have ironically a time and a place. This situation is not one of those. It upsets you but there is nothing you can do about it.

He will distract you instead, taking you on errands and shopping trips around the Devildom. He will indulge your human curiosity under his watchful eyes. Then, he will take you to the kitchens and brew you something strong. If you need to vent while he cooks please feel free, he wants to listen. Nothing you say or do will pass through this room.  

Solomon

Being human, and yet not, he understands the most out of everyone. He has loved and lost a great deal in his lifetimes. Some of which is still a raw wound on his heart. He is very much someone who will avoid talking about his feelings or things that dredge up his past failings.

If you come to him he will give you coping skills and drag you around the Devildom to take your mind off of your thoughts. He’ll take you for walks or to the woods. Is it dangerous? Yes. But the distraction of self-preservation has always worked for him.

During all of this, he will check in on you. If none of his tactics work he’ll cave, taking you to sit on the nearest comfortable surface. He’ll ask you little things about them or your relationship and reply in kind, albeit stiffly. It’s-nice. Some human bonding he didn’t expect. In a way, you both console each other.  

Luke

He’s an angel in training. He can help! Simone has been teaching him! He’s excited but knows he has to tone it down. He’ll recite all the verses and words of wisdom he’s picked up from Simone and Michael.

He’ll sulk a little if it doesn’t help. Well, that’s fine, he will just have to study harder for you! Till then he’ll try other methods. He’s goto is homemade cakes and hugs. He will want you to help baking (he can’t reach the top oven shhhhh).

You naturally take over after a while, and as time in the kitchen progresses you teach him a few recipes that your late loved ones had taught you or were their favorites. It makes you feel better, it’s cathartic. The smell reminds you of home. Luke will memorize each recipe and will make them for you whenever he thinks you're feeling down.

Simone

The first to offer you his condolences and a warm hug. He is very vigilant of you and your mood for weeks after you had confided in him of your loss. His words of wisdom and experience with working with souls were more comforting than with Luke.

He will ask Diavolo to take you outside of the Devildom. Just you, Luke, and himself. You may pick where. Whether it be the mortal realm or the celestial one. If you decide you want to go back home to visit your old stomping grounds then that is where they will go.

You lead him around your familiar territory, pointing out where you and yours would hang out. He’ll buy you things from their favorite stores if you allow it. Humans are sentimental and if a little bobble or trinket will soften the pain in your eyes then it is worth more than gold. Will visit the grave with you to place the things you bought on it. If you allow it will pray from them too. 

Lucifer

He lashes out at first when you come to him. It makes him feel vulnerable, his pack mark is infused with your storm of emotions. He brushes off your feelings and bristles at you trying to seek comfort in him. Familiar loss is a very touchy subject to him and bringing those feelings back to the surface for him hurts in ways he does not want to remember. It takes Simone politely (or not) reminding him it’s not about him and perhaps swallowing a bit of his pride would help you both.

He will come to you in the dead of night. He just opens up and talks to you. He’ll sit on the floor of your room with his back resting on your bed and share memories. You both laugh and recount the good, bad, and some ugly memories. You give each other great words of advice and comfort too. You fall asleep holding his hand with a soft smile on your face. Your tears have dried up hours ago. He leaves you to rest feeling lighter and closer to you in the long run.

If you invite him to the wake he will join without hesitation and hold your hand the whole time.

Mammon

He will cry with you. Seeing you like this makes him think back to the fall, it’s a lot for him. He’ll take you out drinking. It’s how he copes aside from gambling and other reckless things. Turns you into the responsible party of the night. It keeps you busy though that's for sure and side-tracked. Though, he will notice when you are uncomfortable and dips from the casinos to lead you somewhere quiet. He’ll pass a bottle between the two of you and talk about anything that comes to mind. He is bad at opening up in public. But alone and drunk, he has a bleeding heart.

He slips into his big brother persona pretty quickly once you two are alone. He may be a goofball around the others but he can be serious when the time calls for it.

He will ask all sorts of questions about them. He wants to know all about them if you are willing. He loves learning about your life and wants to make it better if he can. He will listen with rapt attention and interrupt only to laugh or ask a question. He swears over a greasy plate of food he bought you both at Hell’s kitchen to sober you that if you want him at the wake just ask.  

Leviathan  

For someone who usually stumbles over his words when you come to him for comfort, he is surprisingly eloquent. He’ll be uncomfortable with physically comforting you until you expressly ask for it.

He’ll try to distract you with video games and asinine conversations while you rest your head on his shoulder and watch. If you’re ok with it he’ll also drape his tail across your lap. The best hug he can give you while his hands are busy with his controller.

He wasn't very close to Lilthe compared to some of the other brothers but he’ll exchange little funny memories he has with you or some cringe-worthy ones to hear you laugh. Between the dim light of his room and the blue glow of his fish tank, you chat until you fall asleep. He doesn’t mind and lets you doze, still filling the dead air with little stories.

Satan

Ah...You have his sincerest condolences. It pains him to admit it but he has never truly felt loss for someone before. Things, yes. A loss of a good book, either stolen by Mammon or destroyed in a fit of rage by himself. He knows that feeling-but those aren’t the same and he knows that it is an ill-suited comparison.

He’ll lend you his ear though. Listen to whatever you have to say, or if you need to cry it out. His arms are always open for you. If you get angry he can help with that.  He knows how to channel it all to be productive or temper it so you don’t burn yourself out while you process your emotions. 

He-like Levi- will give you sage advice or find just the right words of comfort you need. During the school week if you need a break he will gladly take extra notes or turn in your assignments for you while you take some time off. He will give you some books from his personal library too after an off-handed comment about your late loved ones' favorite genre or author. They are yours if they make you happy.

Asmodeus

Sympathy tears like Mammon. He’ll listen with rapt attention and coo over you. Very touchy when he senses you are troubled. He’ll stroke your hair and let you dumb whatever weighs heavy on your heart. Hugs are the best way he knows how to comfort you.

He doesn’t try to distract you from your grief or your emotions. He knows all too well what happens when one bottles up their emotions for too long. Nasty business that. But, if you want a distraction just ask. He'll give you one. Something nice and (hopefully relaxing) maybe a night out perhaps? Or if you want to stay in he’ll pop in a movie or playlist of your choice and stay quiet. You spend the night in enjoying the physical closeness and no need to express yourself or exert energy trying to vocalize your feelings. He’ll bring out his best snack for the movies too, only the best chocolates and dried fruits for you to munch on.

If you have to plan the funeral or wake he will be there every step of the way if you want him to. He can take the reins if you are just too emotionally drained to do it. If you have ideas or plans for it he will follow them to the letter, no questions asked.

Beelzebub

It’s a lot for him. Even though his sister’s death was a millennia ago it’s still fresh in his mind. But he is strong and will do anything in his power to be there for you. The best way he knows how to cope with such pain is to exercise. If you want to, he will take you to the gym and train with you. Let you tire yourself out on a punching bag or weights.

He doesn’t have many words to say so he will just listen. The best partner for this really, you could go on for hours and he would just sit there and truly listen. He won’t judge how you cope, whether it is wailing or you just trying to act normally around campus. He will be a little bit more clingy after you tell him the news. He knows the tells of a breakdown from his twin so he wants to make sure you are not close to one.

If you invite him to the wake he will stay in the back and offer emotional support. Afterward, he’ll walk you around the local neighborhood and ask questions sporadically about how you're doing. Back at school, he will take notes to you and homework if you don’t feel like going in person.

Belphegor

Stays up with you at night if you can’t sleep due to stress or sadness. You can stay up in his room with him as long as you like and do whatever you need to get through this. Stay up or sleep with him though the day is fine. Though, if you stay up too long he will use the pack mark to make you rest. He keeps a close eye on you like his twin does.

He keeps you up in his attic room with him during the school day. Online classes are a thing and he will keep you content and warm with him till you feel up to snuff. He is smart but just lazy, though if you just can’t get the work done he’ll do it for you to turn in. Whatever, you need a break anyway.

He will fill the dead air while you rest with stories of when he would venture to the human realm with his siblings. He likes to hear stories of your childhood and adventures you had with your loved one too. He won’t offer to go to the human realm with you for the wake. But he will give you an elegant star themed decoration for the gravesite if you allow it.

[faerienextdoor]

Hi would it be alright to get a jjk matchup please? I'm 18, pronouns are she/her. I'm I'm ISTJ and a sagittarius. I'm brave, strong willed, confident, loyal and I love to laugh. I can be pretty judgemental though and I hate strangers, always assuming they're the worst and r dangerous so I try to look intimidating and unapproachable and it works most the time I think. When im with my friends though I can be wild and I feel more confident when im with them, I would literally die for them they're amazing.

My hobbies are pretty important to me, I did competitive gymnastics for a while and won quite a few medals. I still workout everyday to keep my skills. I also do figure skating and I like dance but I'm not very good at it lol. I like stormy weather, horror movies, indie music and roadtrips to nowhere. I hate incompetent and ignorant people and dirty/messy places.

hope that's okay :)

Ofc!! thanks for sending this in and hopefully being patient with me as I send these out ;;

I match you up with....

Geto suguru!

You're both logical personality types. You both have concentrations elsewhere, you both cherish the time you spend together and the relationship can flourish, him deeply understanding everything about you and your quirks and habits. He finds every little thing adorable and cute. He insists on having honest and very open communication in the relationship. If there's any issue, he wants it fixed and he wants to talk through anything that bothers the two of you- it's what makes things work. That, and how romantic he manages to be.

He's witty and sarcastic in his own way, and always teases you for the faces you make at strangers as they pass. To him, you never looked unapproachable. Sure, he and gojo would joke back and forth that you had a bad case of rbf, he could just tell it was an act though. He's seen your bravery first hand. He knows how strong you are, but also knows that you have a soft heart if someone pries hard enough- he's seen that giant smile on your face as you laugh your heart out. Sometimes he's the only one who sees it and he absolutely adores that-

He is a formal dancer, preferring to sway with you. You step on his toes here and there but you both laugh it off. And geto LIVES for how your face lights up as he spins you then pulls you right back into his arms. He can't help but pepper your face in kisses and whisk you off for some cuddles!!!

He thinks rain is calming, and embarrassingly enough gets sleepy when he hears thunder and the patter of rain against the roof and windows- he sprawls in bed and his eyes begin to droop, and he basically pleads for you to join him. He's the biggest cuddle bug when he's tired, and you get to deal with him.

Geto loves to just listen to you- even asking you to tell him about your favorite gymnastics event, any funny story that's happened (maybe falling off a balancing beam), anything. Obviously being getou, he probably goes "oh, didn't know you were a sports geek" seeing all your medals. You have permission to punch him in the ribs lmao. He never misses any event if you still do it competitively or want to go to a public gym to practice- you light even he able to convince him to give it a ago! He prefers to watch though, smiling a bit to himself as you powder your hands up and stand in front of an obstacle with a determined yet calculative expression. It might intrigue him and he tries some stretches with you- and damn this man is FLEXIBLE! After his joints crack, ofc. It gives a nice burn and he likes to use some you teach him as a warm up before a mission!! Curses dont see this man coming!!! He's like jelly the morning after but it is SO worth it. Especially if he gets some of your sympathy and you kiss and baby him or even soothe the ache in his muscles with a massage or some muscle ache cream.

You're so graceful on the ice, while getou barely manages to not have to grasp into the railing for dear LIFE. Do not let this idiot try a spin, he will crack his ass and not be able to sit for the longest fucking time-

Boyfriend rating: 9.9/10!!

[grimoireofwritings]

Hiii again!! I cant get enough with ur writing. Please if u dont mind making one., again? UMM where Langris is very jealous to the black bull bcoz his s/o (fem) (a member of black bull) and shes very close with them. Or just along the lines? Thank you agaaain!!

Hello again my dear!! No need to apologize, you can send in as much as your heart desires. I am deeply sorry this is sooooo shamefully late. Chronic health difficulties have gotten a bit complicated lately and I'm trying to be more consistent with this blog. Hopefully the scenario was worth the wait!

Also I headcanon William is the squad's therapist on many occasions, you can't change my mind 💀

Scenario: Langris Vaude's fem s/o is in the black bulls.. and he's jealous!!

No matter how much he pushed the aching itch at the front of his mind away, or brushed aside the little intrusive thoughts he experienced day by day, sometimes even going so far as to manifest them in little growls of frustration and the tightening of his jaw... Langris Vaude was failing horribly... Miserably, even, to set aside his personal emotions regarding the whereabouts of his partner.

She... With those gorgeous (e/c) sparkling hues that always lit up at the sight of something she loved.. and the way the sunlight often glimmered so flawlessly against the soft sheen of her hair - was far too beyond his reach for his comfort. Not only that, it completely wracked at his nerves on a daily basis.. that he... That person.. got to see her and her beauty far more than Langris ever did.

His brother. And the black bulls in general. So unworthy of her presence, her stunning grace. Not only that, he knew about his damn brother. And even he had to admit that he'd be a blind fool not to recognize such a gorgeous woman in his proximity. Considering that shameless flirting habit, it made him grit his teeth knowing that Finral was inevitably wooing her on a daily basis. Beyond his control.

"Does he even realize how lucky he is to be graced with her mere presence?? So undeserving.."

This had been Langris' current obsession for about a month now, and it haunted him, even going as far as losing sleep against his own will. It was getting to the point that he was grinding his teeth and mumbling to himself, much to the dismay and terror of his subordinates as he passed them by in the HQ's long hallways... Probably fearing for their lives being so close to his dangerous aura, permeating off of him like a toxin.

But after one last all-nighter of complete mental torture, he was done in, he had finally caved. It took a lot, and I mean a shit load of stress to force Langris into swallowing his pride. Something he was about to do that morning.

He knew Captain Vangeance was up, even at this ungodly hour. The man seemed to enjoy getting up at the crack of dawn to get a head start on his work load, for the sake of having spare time in the evenings to tend to his private garden. Yet here was he, concerningly deep and dark bags under his eyes, as he paced and debated with himself outside the Captain's door to his office, feeling held back by his own dignity on the line to actually knock.

Eventually though, his choice was made for him, as his mumbling was interrupted by the door opening up. There was his Captain, the same trademark amiable smile on his face as he appeared before him, seemingly in a bit of a preoccupied hurry. He halted completely though upon spotting his Vice Captain, raising a brow, before his expression immediately faltered into a look of concern at the sight of Langris appearing so unhinged. Was something going on that he had failed to notice?

"Langris, good morning. You look troubled. Is there something I can help you with?" He tilted his head expectantly, a friendly and welcoming look in his eyes behind that mask of his. Langris bit his lip.. somehow the open offer made him feel even more on edge than he'd expected. Geez.. why did his Captain have to be such an insufferable softie??

Giving a few reluctant grumbles, the shorter spacial mage gave a slow nod. "Yeah... I came for some.. advice" he said, begrudgingly managing to spit out the last word distastefully. And to his slight surprise, Vangeance didn't hesitate to give a nod and he opened up the door to his office, offering the space for the two of them. "Of course. Step inside."

There was a bit of an awkward quietness as they did just that, Langris being sure to avoid eye contact - as he instead focused on the sensation of a crisp breeze passing by through the opened windows and the faint scent of the flowers William cared for in his office. It brought "life" to the space, the Captain had said.. it had made Langris scoff.

He watched Vangeance approach his desk, but instead of circling around to take a seat, he settled for leaning back against the wooden mahogany top, letting it support his weight. "Alright. What's on your mind?" He asked. It honestly sometimes amazed Langris how the Captain managed to speak in a way that was both gentle and calming, yet straightforward and confident.

"I... Have.... A girlfriend..." He started after an agonizingly long pause. Each word seemed so painfully difficult to force out through gritted teeth. But after another few passing moments, the image popped into his tormented mind again. Finral... That ridiculous, stupid, idiotic grin on his face as he flirted in the most unbecoming, disrespectful way to his precious y/n. And that was it - his resolve broke. And his insecurities became less important than his need to vent.

"She's with the black bulls. She's a magic knight under Yami and... Sometimes I just get so pissed off that my damn good for nothing brother gets to spend far more time with her than I ever can. I'm so busy and swamped with work here that I hardly even have time to make plans.. and take her on dates. I want to treat her with the respect and care she deserves, but.. I can't. And that makes me afraid."

He was gritting his teeth, utterly humiliated as tears began to prick his eyes. Why? He figured it was probably because he hadn't actually talked about his feelings with someone in ages. Perhaps he'd repressed more than he realized.

"Afraid she'll abandon you for something or someone else..?" William prompted gently. And Langris nodded. "Yeah.. I mean, my brother. We all know he was the one out of my family that our peers preferred. I was better, I was praised, I was rewarded on a materialistic level for talent. But I was never.. liked. In the way he was. With that whole soft hearted sensitive guy display. She's around him, all day, every day.. and I just... I..."

He finally cracked a bit more and planted his face in his hands, unable to finish. Completely destraught. And he was forced in that moment to face his own inner ugliness - the insecurities and jealousy he felt so much shame for harboring at all.

William gave him a brief moment, both to ensure he had finished saying all he needed to express, and to truly consider those words. He hummed. "I see. It seems this is something that's been deeply disturbing you and impacting your health, even. A very painful and helpless situation, by the sound of it. It pains me to see you so destraught, Langris."

For a moment, as Vangeance removed his mask and placed it neatly beside him, Langris mistook a look of sympathy and empathy in those eyes for something as disgusting as pity. And he snapped, making an impulsive remark in his state of frightened vulnerability.

"Whatever. As if you have any experience with women to begin with, what with that face-"

He halted abruptly before he could finish. No, that was unacceptably harsh. "I apologize." He mumbled, a moment later. William Vangeance sighed deeply, brushing off the remark. It clearly stung but he was far more concerned about his underling than himself at that moment. "You're forgiven, Langris."

The Vice Captain began to shuffle and twitch nervously, this was going so much worse than he even thought possible. But that changed with William's next words.

"Langris. I think you ought to have a little more faith in your partner's judgement, and her decision making. Despite all the time she spends with the black bulls, and your brother, she still chose you, above them. She developed those special feelings for you, and at the end of the day, you are her person.. the person she loves. Trust that judgement of hers, and that she hand selected you for a reason. Women are smart like that, they hardly waste their time with someone they aren't interested in. I am positive she cherishes you, and thinks of you, every day."

He smiled, and even approached his subordinate with a warmth in his expression. "I think.. perhaps it would reassure you to reach out to her, a bit more. She understands you have a lot of responsibility, but with women, I've definitely perceived that they appreciate even the smallest gestures immensely. Send her hand written notes, flowers, or even sweets. Whatever you know she likes the most, and would appreciate as a gesture of affection. It will remind her that you're thinking of her, and likewise, I'm positive she will respond to you in a way that provides you some peace of mind. Rekindle that romance, and maybe even.. consider opening up to her about your feelings, like you have right now."

Langris interrupted, shaking his head stubbornly. "No. Then she'll know how weak I am" he stated. Vangeance chuckled, his smile softening. "Hmm.. I disagree. I can garuntee you that she will perceive such vulnerability as trust. She'll see that you trust her integrity to confide in her. That will strengthen your relationship with her more than anything else. I promise.. just try it once, and tell me how it works out."

Langris puffed a sigh through his cheeks. "Fine... Fine. Fine." He repeated the word, each time a bit more in defeat. "Listen.. I'll try it, but only because I'm desperate. And because I want to, not because you told me to."

With that, William held back a grin of amusement, and he nodded in satisfaction. "Of course. Hopefully, that will help you out. But besides that.. I think I'm going to give you some time off. Go see her, and spend some quality time by her side. I think it would do you some good."

Langris raised a brow, seemingly a bit confused. "But Captain, all my work-" he was interrupted by a hand, that was held upwards with a sense of finality. "No buts. Besides... Your quality of work is suffering anyway due to your current state of health. I'd rather you go take care of yourself first, then return to finish up your tasks properly. Until then, I'll take care of things. You have my word that everything will be fine."

Langris took a few long moments to ponder this, and his Captain's gesture. He started to realize more and more, working alongside Vangeance, why his squad was so fiercely loyal to him, and that their team was so successful to begin with.

"Alright. I'll accept your offer. Vangeance..."

He glanced up at his Captain sheepishly as he followed the scarred man towards the exit of his office.

"Thank you. Very much."

[toutallyahoe]

Bad Start, Good End ~ Aziraphale (Good Omens)

Requested By: --

A/N: this sucks

but i am too lazy to do something about it hnnnn anyways, might rewrite it but we all know i wont so... fuck

─────────────────

Today was an awful day.

Simply awful, that's what [Name] had concluded as he quickened his pace to not get caught by the cries of the heavens above pouring down to the earth. But alas, he was already soaked to the bone. His used to be clean and dry suit already ruined with the fabric clinging onto his skin which annoyed him greatly. His [Hair color] hair was a wet mess. The sloshing sound of his wet sock covered feet inside his shoes made him cringe from how wet and disgusting it is.

And not to forget that the [Hair color] haired man clearly knows the paperwork he had done earlier inside the brown briefcase he was holding is absolutely ruined and thinking about it, he will restart his report again. What a pain...

Muttering curses on the heavens above on why was he being cursed with this awful bad luck right now. [Name] was so done.

Was it because he did not help that kid in the park earlier that day on getting his ball off of the tree? That brat deserves that crap! That little brat was being a dick from messing with those poor ducks that was passing by to go to the lake.

Sighing, the [Hair color] haired man looked around where he was going to and saw no one on the streets, well, it was quite obvious with the pouring rain. Another sigh left his lips as the man looked at the heavens above, the rain hitting his face as he glared at the sky. Anger can be seen in his [Eye color] eyes yet also just tiredness and despair.

"God, why do you make me suffer today?" [Name] had asked to no one in particular as he then looked back in front of him to find whatever to help him shelter from the weather.

Continuing his walking  the [Hair color] haired man would look around to find any shops that were open to atleast shelter his soaked form until the rain pass. But none seemed to be that welcoming. Especially how every building seemed to make him be like the plague as they locked their doors.

Clack

Clack

Clack

The sound of his shoes hitting the wet pavement as the droplets of water continue to hit his [Skin colorp skin. It was honestly annoying as the [Hair color] haired man often cringe when he had stepped on a very large puddle on the street. His already soaking wet shoes and sock making him shudder.

"I should have paid attention to that weatherman," [Name] grumbled, thinking back earlier when he was still groggy and tired that he zoned out from whatever the newscaster were saying in his television when he was about to start brewing some coffee to start the day, only to then realize the time was ticking and panicking on it.

Sighing, the [Hair color] haired man was clearly wishing he did bring his umbrella to work but the day did not went his way. Going to work three minutes late which that one person who seemed to have some bone to pick with him (he didn't know what ever he dont to them but they're an asshole to him) won't stop ranting on how he was a disgraceful worker for being late. It did not help how [Name] had not drank his coffee nor had eaten breakfast which his mood was very thin. Causing him to snap at that pompous prick and it lead to him getting a warning for it.

"I hate this..." [Name] [Last name], the name of our poor man, had said as he stopped walking. The rain hitting the earth and him aswell, yet he didn't know what to do now. He was already wet and everything. This was not his day.

Looking at where he was, [Name] let out a sigh of relief to see a building that maybe he can hide away from the rain. The [Hair color] haired male prayed to whatever deities that was looking at him from the clouds above that he won't get kicked out for being soaking wet and not get yelled at with probably soaking the whatever tacky carpet in the shop he would come in to shelter for a bit.

Approaching the building, [Name] took mind that it looked rather homey, on the outside it is. [Name] was never one to judge in appearance... most of the time. Looking at the building once more, [Name] did not seem to recognize the building. Well, it was a bookstore. The door had a sign that said it was open which [Name] was thankful for and hoped he won't be disturbing anyone when he comes inside.

Opening the door, he stood there with a bit hesitation clearly seen in his form. Was this considered rude to come in being soaked to the bone? God, he hoped not. The [Hair color] haired man sighed, let's hope the owner or the clerk gives him some slack and sympathy to atleast let him shelter until the storm passes or only had drizzled left.

  

Aziraphale did not expect anyone to come in inside his bookstore. His little bookstore was something not many would go to, really. Often times, he gets people coming in his little bookstore for they had mistaken his with the other bookstore in the next street from his.

Aziraphale did not mind though. In fact, the sole reason he had this bookstore was merely an upfront for it was only a place where he could store his books that he collected from the centuries he had lived. After all, being an angel who looked after the earth had it's perks and one of them is getting to see how humanity evolved. May it be good or not, he saw a lot. And also collected a lot. In form of books, that is.

So, angel of the Almighty, Aziraphale did not expect the door of his little shop to have the bell's jingle, stating that someone had entered. The white haired angel was confused. Who on earth would come inside in such a weather to get a book? But whatever he had thought, the angel had to welcome the newcomer and also say that none of the books inside the shop was for sale. Only be looked but never to be sold. Ever.

Rounding up the corner, Aziraphale looked mildly shock and perhaps a bit miffed on what he saw. A [Hair color] haired man, soaked to the bone. His suit was wet and in no doubt that the briefcase he was carrying that whatevers inside that was ruined. But what caught the angel's was that the man looked so helpless. It made the angel's mood quickly change for shock and annoyed to pity and compassion.

Aziraphale saw the man's eyebrows were furrowed as he looked around like he was looking for something, occasionally shivering as he stayed at the door. Not really coming inside and the white haired being didn't know if he should be glad or disappointed. Especially how the man may be dripping on the floor of the shop but he still stayed there on the door to not cause more. Clearly, the man was hesitant to come in inside to damage the flooring of his quaint little bookshop.

"Um... hello?" There was shakiness on the man's voice that Aziraphale noticed. The poor fellow was in no doubt shivering and soaked, the angel decided to help the poor man. He need to as the [Hair color] haired man was shivering a lot and Aziraphale remembered that humans were weak creatures who should not be exposed in these types of weather or else they would get sick, or worse, die.

"Hello?" Aziraphale had softly said as he smiled warmly at the [Hair color] haired man as he calmly approached the man. The angel saw the [Hair color] haired man had sent him a shaky and apologetic look. "Welcome, what can I help you with?" Asked the angel. Knowing what the human really needed but Aziraphale wanted to be a good host, and also to not cause any misunderstandings.

"Well... um... sorry for the inconvenience," Aziraphale was surprised with the man's words. Why would he apologize? "But, I just needed to shelter for the rain for a bit. I'll be gone when it lessens but if you want to kick me out, umm, I'll go," the [Hair color] haired man sent a smile. Nervous he was and the angel knew that. It caused Aziraphale's chest clench a bit. This poor man.

"Ah! Nonsense," said Aziraphale. A welcoming smile in his lips as he approached the man on the door. "Please come inside, you are soaked to the bone!"

The man let out a hearty laugh but shakes his head in disagreement. "It is alright... I don't want to inconvenience you any further sir," he had said. The angel would have none of that though.

"No, it is alright! I insist," Aziraphale had said as he saw the [Hair color] haired man hesitate.

"A... are you sure? I don't want to ruin this shop's flooring," the [Hair color] haired man frowned as he looked around then settled his gaze to Aziraphale's form. "I can just stand here... to... not cause any more problems..." Aziraphale heard him mutter.

"No, no! It is alright, you need assistance and I am happy to assist you," Aziraphale urged and the man bit his bottom lip, thinking his options but nodded, albeit a bit hesitant. The white haired being saw him placed his briefcase on the floor as he fully went inside and closed the door. The angel knew that whatever was inside was in no doubt ruined.

"Should I take my shoes off to not cause more problem...?" Aziraphale couldn't help but smile at the man's insistence of not causing more inconvenience. Shaking his head in disagreement, he smiled at the man.

"It is alright," Aziraphale had said. "Now come, I think I can help dry you up for a bit," the man seemed to be hesitant and Aziraphale seemed to realized why.

"Oh! Do not worry, I will not do anything to you," the angel assured as a he felt his cheeks heat up. Was he to straight forward for that? Maybe he should just offered to give the man a towel. Thoughts muddled with his mistake, the angel did not noticed the man's amusement... but the angel did feel it. A bit that is.

"Thank you..." Aziraphale heard the [Hair color] haired man softly muttered. The angel's eyes soften as he brightly smiled at his visitor.

"It is no problem," Aziraphale had said. "Now come, you looked soaked to the bone!"

 

[Name] sat comfortably in one of the white haired being's couch as he took a sip from the tea the other had brewed. The [Hair color] haired man in a different clothing than his soaked suit that the other had lent him. Insisted on him wearing until his clothes dry off in the washer. Surprisingly, the clothes that the kind owner was to his own taste of style and also fits well with his form. It was a miracle to have clothes fitting for him, oddly enough. [Name] brushed it off as coincidence though.

The [Hair color] haired man, although felt guilty with practically mooching off with this nice owner of the small bookshop he stumbled on, felt glad too. This was probably one of the good things that had happened to his day as he watch the other man (named Aziraphale as what the white haired had introduced himself when he realized he never did) talking about one of the books he has.

[Name] had to admit, Aziraphale had an impressive collection of books. It honestly baffled him to see a very old yet still well preserved copy of William Shakespeare's books. Aziraphale had told, well, more so bragged, about how the books of the store were the very first copies and very rare edition of books from the centuries of past writers. And [Name] in no doubt believed Aziraphale's words.

The [Hair color] haired male had hung to every word that left Aziraphale's lips with awe plastered on his face. Aziraphale was currently telling a story about this one particular book he had that one costumer was so adamant on buying. Few chuckles leaving his lips when Aziraphale's face would show annoyance and irritation on that person who had shouted at him for not selling the book. It was amusing. [Name] had a smile on his face as he listened to Aziraphale's tales.

  

Aziraphale felt himself be happy and content on the bright and calming feeling he felt from the [Hair color] haired male he had helped. It was a nice feeling to help someone in need as the angel also did not miss the smile that never left [Name]'s lips as he told some amusing stories that happened in his quaint little bookshop or how he obtained some of his books.

The white haired being couldnt help but appreciate the [Hair color] haired man's presence. [Name] had a calming aura surrounding him and the aura of joy just radiating him was something Aziraphale welcome wholeheartedly. It was nice.

Aziraphale was worried for the [Hair color] haired human when he entered his shop. He was a shivering mess and he looked absolutely tired and done with life. The angel fully knew that [Name] had an awful day, but even so, [Name] didn't projected that anger and tiredness out to anyone. The [Hair color] haired man acted like a proper gentleman and Aziraphale was both happy and also rather sad about that.

Aziraphale was happy, in no doubt. [Name] had thought of others before him (not like a certain demonic friend of his who would blow off to anything to inconvenience him) but the angel was also sad because the poor man looked so done and tired when he entered the shop. Aziraphale knew [Name] was so hesitant on coming inside through his mannerism and the human's constant worried glances whenever he walks inside the shop in his soaked up form.

When Aziraphale had miracled some fitting clothes to the [Hair color] haired man and assured him that it was fine, the angel couldn't help but think on things to help [Name]. Aziraphale saw [Name] was a good man and the white haired being just wanted to help. After all, Aziraphale is a servant of the Almighty, and the Almighty would be happy to see her servants are helping her beloved creation. Not to mention Aziraphale just felt that [Name] needed something good to happen to him with all the things he had been through.

So here the two now, sitting comfortable in the white haired being's couches. Having tea and talking to each other with the air of calmness and content. Both [Name] and Aziraphale had smiles on their lips as they talked on things they had like. Spending time until the rain passed.

[legionofpotatoes]

alright here’s ma thoughts on that flick I mentioned

we hatewatched a*my of the dead because we were CONVINCED “zombies in las vegas” would be an impossible concept to screw up, but in so assuming we obviously invoked a holy wager with the universe and got reminded, once again, that hoping for improvement from someone who’s dependably put out bad art is never a wise choice 😐

but we were honestly kinda roped in by the marketing??? and expected a goofy fast-paced flick with the odd traditional undead metaphor thrown in, framing some sort of relationship drama maybe or hell even nothing at all! we’d have taken pure indulgent storytelling, idk italian job with zombies in las vegas, I don’t know fucking anything but??? whatever this was???? spoilers below for it is time for One Of My Rants

I mean the main reason I really want to write all this and complain. this film here probably has the most unappealing cinematography I have ever experienced in my life and that is saying something. who the fuck signed off on that CONSTANT shallow-ass depth of field that imprisons your eyeline and turns every shot into bokeh paste???? and I mean every shot almost!!!! I promise if you think I am overreacting just throw a dart at the seek bar and watch twenty seconds from wherever it lands. it is horrifying to look at. at least it gave my girlfriend a good visual shorthand for what it’s like when I lose my glasses

why was sean spicer in this movie. did they pay him to be here. was sean spicer paid hollywood money for his scene in this film because fuck everyone who was involved in that decision

the legitimately baffling hints at the extraterrestrial origins of the infection that went absolutely nowhere and had no dramatic or plot-level bearing. we love to see the franchise sprouts fellas

yet another big budget waste of everything hiroyuki sanada has to offer. and bautista too I guess? I like him but man was this an odd career move

what was the crux of his conflict/resolution with his daughter btw. I understand it was rooted in miscommunication over their forms of grief irt mom but uhh… it was all rather clunky and didn’t land for me. I tried I really tried to buy in but something was wrong fundamentally with the groundwork there, it did not click and their catharsis felt unearned. I know there’s massive amounts of tragic baggage being projected there from the author so I’m not slapping any judgment down really;

but again it would be an easy thing to wave off if they just had a vibrant cast of lovable simpletons with good chemistry and the kinetic sense of plotting the trailers promised (and this premise never discounts good drama, either). but instead it was just two and a half (!) hours of meandering into situations the filmmaking instincts had no idea how to flow in and out of

to wit. I know talking about “bad pacing” is associated with armchair bullshit but consider the example of the scene were dieter does an out of nowhere little dance after childishly screaming but then still-killing a zombie, with the film framing this as a micro character triumph, and not a second later the bg soundtrack instantly fades into an orchestral score dramatizing a nearby mcguffin reveal, completely 180 degreeing the tone without a semblance of deft insert shot stitching or even I dont know a fucking jump cut maybe. now imagine this whiplash for 2.5 hrs uninterrupted

I will keep complaining about the length yeah because this was not a story requiring this much real estate to be told. Uhh in my humble and personal opinion, of course

[man sees zombie tiger] “this is crossing the line!” you can in fact write dialogue that is not utter nonsense that falls apart once you drill down its single fickle layer of referential meta winking. what line are you talking about. you have rules in this insane situation you’re in? total nitpick moment I know but it got burned in my brain for some reason. like a microcosm of the mismanaged dramatic instincts paired with weird writing that dots this movie. I am sure the director calls this either satire or genre deconstruction. I am SO sure

tumblr domino meme that goes from “dude getting sucked off while driving” to “entire las vegas literally nuked”

tig notaro is always great to see but once you know she’s been filmed as a separate greenscreen plate months after photography wrapped - cause she had to apparently replace some abusive asshole but that’s a whole other pig not worth fucking - it becomes impossible to unsee her odd detachment from everyone else in the movie lmao. it doesn’t really “ruin” anything on its lonesome but it is hard to unsee

why. was. sean. spicer. in. this. movie

a very simple key ingredient missing from fully turning lip service sympathy for main uruk hai dude into actual empathy that would generate meaningful conflict with hero family would be to spend a bit more time articulating what he internally wanted the most. because he was obviously trying to do something here with pointed agenda. a family, to have kids, build a caste system, save his wife’s head, return to his planet??? all of these could represent the bigger context in his psychology that spurred his vengeance but none of them are dramatically emphasized long enough for you to cheer him on. I’m not asking too much I promise. Articulating interiority of a mute character is pretty doable with deft cinema language, just gotta linger and hold a shot here and there for a few seconds, frame as his POV, donezo. I know this is also one of those like. “who cares” moments but the movie does, very evidently so, in making this guy an actual character. you can kinda piece it together and create a framework of sympathy for him, sure, but then again he ultimately becomes a foil to be killed and not defeated, so. Ehh whatever

quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was n

the rooftop helicopter fakout at the end was such an ass-backwards, manufactured moment of what could be a simple setup/payoff it just pissed me off??? you gain nothing by giving sad dad five seconds of pointless crisis that flips right back to previous status quo ANYWAY, except for a weaksauce waste of runtime, which could be used instead to get inside notaro’s head and actually SHOW the remorse form as she took off, literally maybe even a frown playing on her face as she’s headed for safety right before we cut back to drax and the kid. just a simple-ass, minimal, momentary setup for what is the most basic filmmaking trick of creating macro catharsis moments. Just???? g o d if you can’t even land that shit why are you even doing any of this

that lil run final pam did was very very charming and super choreographed in a way that was the tiiiniest bit overdone

the whole intro with the simul-backstories and posing with family photos was just… oddly motivated. what was the goal? “here’s what we’re fighting for” vignettes? why? it’s not a functional setup in that vein. what was all that

also I am sorry if this is insensitive but the reasons most characters end up articulating to justify going back into the hell that destroyed their lives makes them sound seriously insane

I dont like complaining about CGI (honestly) but so much of it in modern movies can achieve higher fidelity if the animation is simply subdued. Do not overengineer and over-apply 2D cell methodologies and kinematics to each tiny twitch and movement in a hyper 3D model and I promise you. it will look a thousand times more natural. look at thanos in those last two movies. your rendering and detail are absolutely perfect with the tiger you just have to let stuff sit instead of constantly simulating swaying hair strands and firing off all facial muscles at once. great moment at one point where makeup zombie horse and CG zombie tiger are both in one shot together and just by unnecessary amounts of movement alone you can tell who doesn’t belong. again; detail, rendering, compositing, lighting, all picture-perfect; but y’all just gotta let the animation breathe sometimes, and chill it out

plot holes don’t really matter to me but it was kinda funny how lilly decided not to mention the enormous wrinkle in intel pertaining to an actual territorial tribe of intelligent zombies that require human offerings to let you pass, just so that reveal could play out in real time through the joyous punishment of the cartoonishly misogynistic dude

total chad move for mister uruk hai and final pam to rule from a rusted swimming pool complex

the ending with vanderohe oh my god. with the. cash stacks at the airport register. and specifically them working in his favor. that is literally something you do to get arrested under suspicion of theft. it was almost played for laughs and I respect that. coulda been goofier. make these movies goofy ya dorks

anyway, weird, weird movie. bad marketing. message unclear (something something sins of the father???), baffling editing instincts, literal worst-looking cinematography I ever laid eyes upon. Confidently dying on that last hill

[dracosearlgreytea]

indelicate marks (8)

indelicate marks: chapter eight: the third lesson 

A/N: hello all, its me again! here is chapter 8! i hope you dont mind my updates being a little slower now as i mayhaps be working on a second draco fic rn,,, dont worry i will be continuing to update indelicate marks as much as possible!! lots of love and enjoy - ivy

warnings: language, indications of childhood neglect 

lovely tags: @h-annahayy @okaydraco @fanficflaneuse @thatoneasrastan @biinspiration

indelicate marks index

To say you felt confused about Draco by the time it was coming to your third meeting would be an understatement. It had been a long, long week. Studying was becoming more and more tedious. Being in the same lessons as Draco was also proving to make paying attention increasingly difficult; there had been several occasions when he'd looked up from the notes in front of him to find you already staring at him from your desk. Cheeks flushing, you'd only pretend to busy yourself with your work, inwardly cringing. Whilst his outburst during your first meeting had managed to indirectly answer the questions that had previously bugged you, it had also managed to provoke more. Mostly, about what the hell the Dark Lord had tasked Draco to do - and why it was so awful that he was running himself into the ground trying to get it done. December had only began, but you dreaded to think what he would go home to for Christmas. You, yourself, were not so thrilled about having to return home, the thought of Bellatrix Lestrange potentially making another visit putting you on constant edge. And, to make matters worse, it seemed that the hug between you and Draco during your last meeting cropped up in your thoughts more commonly than you'd ever allow yourself to admit. Whatever had come across him to make him hug you - after, only days before, making it very clear that you were not friends - well, you had no idea what it was. The feeling of someone with their arms wrapped around you was so alien. After all, you had spent most of your years at Hogwarts with a ghost, and the times you did have living friends, physical contact had come few and far between. And yet, with Draco, it had felt so... natural. You found your thoughts crawling back to him on several occasions. His heart beating, slow, the smell of his expensive cologne - the way you fitted, just under his chin. It all offered a frustratingly tempting sense of comfort, and you forbid yourself from thinking about it. Of course, you thought about it anyway. "You're late again." Draco's mechanical tone came as soon as you stepped into the classroom. It took a moment for you to turn as you had been shutting the door, locking it as usual. "Maybe you're just always early." You sighed, finally facing where he was sat, on the same desk he always seemed to linger by. Bloody hell. Draco looked damn right abysmal. Eyes bloodshot, shadows set his features in deeply, as though he hadn't eaten in a week. His shoulders slumped, but not in the cocky manner they usually were. Even the raise of his eyebrow was sluggish. "What's wrong with me this time?" He droned, lazily watching as you'd frozen mid-movement, staring at him from across the room. "Malfoy, when was the last time you ate?" You strode closer towards him, stomach dropping as you noted how much worse he looked the closer you got. "Or slept? Did you try taking the Sleeping Draught?" "Too many questions." Draco winced away from you, waving his hand dismissively and getting to his feet. You tried your best not to sigh, watching him for a moment longer. He shouldn't be doing anything other than napping, let alone performing Legilimency. "Are you going to be okay-" "I'm fine. Now shut up." Scowling, but not pushing further, you emptied your mind, watching as Draco pulled out his wand and pointed it towards you, eyebrow arched in question. You gave him a nod, and then he spoke. "Legilimens." The force of the spell was less unexpected this time, and you frantically pushed it back. It was like trying to catch boiling water in your bare hands, desperately trying not to let it slip through your fingers, or drop it at all, your skin sizzling painfully as you contained it. A moment passed, and for a second you thought you'd successfully kept him out - then, a second wave, more scalding than ever. You recognised your own gasp as it hit you - sharp, like the first time he'd cast the spell on you in the bathrooms. Before you could stop it, the water was slipping through your fingers. "Have you ever spoken to him? Malfoy?" Hermione Granger's voice filtered back to you. It was one of those rare times they'd snuck you into the Gryffindor common room after a DA meeting. Harry and Ron sat on the sofa opposite you, Harry visibly perking up at the mention of Draco, setting his eyes on you. The glint within them were almost intimidating.   You hesitated, shaking your head as your lips parted. "Come on," Harry groaned before you could speak. "You can't tell me you've been going to school with him for five years and you haven't spoken to him once. He's in your house." "I really don't see many people from my house if I can help it." You shot back, before sighing. "But fine, okay? I've spoken to him once." "What shit did he give you?" Ron grumbled, and you froze, for a moment. All eyes lingered on you, and your arm began to burn. Reminding. You tugged at your sleeve as it did. "He didn't." Your voice was quiet. "He was... nice." Then, it all fell away. There was nothing to see - just darkness, and the softness of a beating heart. Arms around your shoulders, firm, but careful. The flutter of your hair as someone breathed, slow. A chin resting on your head. Expensive cologne. "Stop it." Your growl had left you before you'd fully pulled back into reality. Whilst you had to swallow heavily to push back the sick feeling in your stomach, there was no true panic left behind - only humiliation. Draco's face was blank, but those grey eyes held an emotion you couldn't quite decipher. Narrowing your eyes, you shot him a glare through your dizziness. "Did you do that on purpose?" You pressed, prompting the corners of his lips to shift a little. Straightening, you ignored the sudden tightness in your chest. "Draco Malfoy, you little shit-" "So you think I'm nice?" Eyes glittering with a taunting amusement as you avoided looking anywhere in his general direction, Draco's lips pulled into a very smug smirk. "And I smell good? I mean, if I knew you were going to enjoy it that much I wouldn't have bothered-" "Shut up!" His teasing stung more than you'd liked, and whilst he'd stopped talking, his complacent grin did not fall from his lips. Your body burned hot with embarrassment. "Don't go looking for yourself in my memories. It's rude, and honestly, it's bloody narcissistic." "I never denied being either of those things," Draco spoke smoothly, and you shot him the dirtiest glance you could muster. Flicking his brow upward, his eyes cheekily darted away from you, barely even attempting to hide his smile. Your throat dried as he did - how dare he be so bloody attractive? - and you had to blink, snapping your eyes away from him before he noticed. "I'm just - I'm just not used to it, alright?" You grumbled, prompting his face to settle more into one you recognised. His brow knitted neatly together. "What do you mean?"   "People." You still didn't meet his gaze, fiddling with the cuff of your sleeve. "Well, being... close to them, anyway." Draco searched your expression for a moment, and you dared a glimpse up at him. He was staring at you with the unreadable glint again, like he was before he began his taunting. It was intense, and made your chest squeeze with both discomfort and something else you couldn't quite describe. "Not even your family?" He asked, carefully, shaking his head when you fixed him with a dead expression. "I know not your parents, but whoever raised you. They don't show affection at all?" You hesitated. Why Draco was suddenly interested in your personal life, you had no idea, but his intentions didn't seem malicious. In fact, his expression was the smallest bit softer than usual. "I live with my mother's sister." You explained, tone vacant, shrugging. "She pretends I don't exist, mostly." Draco fell silent, only giving you a singular nod of acknowledgement - and, if you were honest, you were glad he didn't offer any halfhearted sympathy. A question lingered on the tip of your tongue, and you scanned his features, unsure. "Malfoy?" His eyes snapped back up to you, and he answered with a small hum. Your teeth dragged over your bottom lip before you spoke. "Are you going to be alright over Christmas?" Draco only stared at you for a second, clearly having not expected you to turn the conversation onto him. His shoulders seemed to tense, but then he shrugged, features stony. "Nothing I haven't dealt with before." That cold, matter-of-fact tone did nothing to hide the bitterness and dread hidden within his words. In fact, they remained clear in your conscious for the rest of the week, as the days of December counted down. Draco was doing well to hide it. So well, that you questioned if you had only made an assumption and not really caught it within his words. But Draco was scared. And for that reason, in particular - so were you.

[iatasbcl]

I just wanted to be sure to not make you uncomfortable! Can i request an oneshot with connor and his s.o self harming/having depression? If you dont want to so it it's fine with me either!! 🥀

Rain Clouds

Pairing: Connor RK800 x GN Reader

A/N: Thank you for asking beforehand! it’s been a hot minute since I wrote for my boy, also a quick reminder: requests are open!

I didn’t write the self-harming part because I’m not very comfortable with that. The portrayal of depression here is based on my personal experience since you did not specify a scenario. It does not represent everyone’s experiences.

Warnings: Depression, minor?? panic attack, overall it just has sensitive subjects,,, please don’t read if it makes you uncomfortable 

W.C: 1.8K

Connor wasn’t ever designed for this. He wasn’t created to show any empathy or sympathy, he wasn’t made to bring anyone comfort.

Yet here he was, in a dim room with a very, very distraught human. You, to be exact. You were sobbing, your hands covered your face as tears continued to wet your face. He didn’t expect this to happen when he chose to visit you after you didn’t show up at work for a few days.

He had known you for about half a year now. You were one of the few people at the precinct to welcome when he first joined as a machine. You only grew closer and closer after that, with you and Hank helping him realize he is deviant and guide through the mess that was humanity and emotions. He… liked being around you.

He was admittedly worried, you acted different prior to today. Your usual cheery self had gradually morphed into a quiet, distant one. You didn’t laugh at Gavin’s attempts to make you chuckle, you didn’t smile while greeting him, you didn’t even pet Sumo when Hank brought him to the precinct. You’d fall behind on work, barely eat and quick diagnoses showed that your stress level was constantly high.

Something was wrong, and he needed to make sure you were alright. He’d seen patterns similar to yours in Hank before and he didn’t want to even think about things escalating that far.

“I’m fine, you shouldn’t worry about me.”

Your words lacked sincerity as your neglected appearance contrasted them. The dark circles around your eyes got heavier, your hair looked as if it was left uncared for, you were severally dehydrated and probably hadn’t eaten a sufficient meal in a while. You didn’t like it when he questioned you on it.

“I said I’m fine, just been too lazy to cook anything.”

In retrospect, he should’ve given you the space you needed. He should’ve known persisting on the matter would only cause your stress to get worse. But he didn’t, he just wanted to help. He cared for you too much, he couldn’t handle it if something had happened to you.

“Stop analyzing me!”

Your burst was justified, but he truly did not know how to react to it.

“God, do you think that’s all that life is? You will just go around scan whatever you like and give back some diagnostic that nobody asked for? Are you just a fucking machine, Connor?”

You immediately froze after saying that, your breathing was heavy, and tears started to trickle down your face. Connor didn’t know what to say. Just a machine. He was acting like a machine. Your words stung but he pushed that aside.

“Fuck… I’m so sorry I didn’t – I didn’t –”

A sob interrupted your apology and you moved your hands to cover your face again. Your body slowly descended, and you sat on the floor. Connor could feel his own stress level increase as he stood upon your shaky form, not knowing what he is supposed to do. The storm overrunning his mind was kept at bay, though. Showing you that he too was afraid would not make things better.

Your breathing started quickening and getting heavier when you finally faced him. A quick scan showed that your heart was racing abnormally. Contemplations filled his mind, should he call an ambulance?

He moved closer to you but stopped when you immediately moved back, “Don’t, don’t come close.” You stammered in a trembling voice.

“Okay. Okay, I’m sorry. Uh - what do you need? What can I do?”

You shook your head,” I dunno, fuck-” your choked voice only got croaker as you tried to speak, “It’s okay… just, just focus on your breathing.” Connor was only doing what he felt might help you and getting your breathing to stabilize became his current objective.

“…trying,” you closed your eyes and Connor continued to stare at you as you struggled. “water, need water.”

He nodded and got up. With hurried footsteps, he went into your kitchen and brought you a glass of water. He came back to you and stood still for a second. Should he get closer? Should he help you drink it?

“Con. Help.” That was his cue. He kneeled next to you and held the glass to your lips. You drank it steadily, as much as you could. The glass was lowered, and he was ready to back off, to give you your space. But you reached out to him and held his hand. He could feel the pressure of it as you squeezed it tightly.

The pattern of your breathing started to follow a consistent pattern after that and as time went on your trembles began to decline but you still shuddered.

+

Carrying you to bed was an easy task. He’d done so as per your dizzy self’s request and helped you lay down and made sure you were adequately hydrated. 

He glanced over you and saw how drained you looked. The idea of you, the one he cared about so much, being so broken hurt him. He wanted to ask, to know how long you’d suffered in silence without him noticing a thing. He wanted to know how to help.

Now wasn’t the time, though.

“You shouldn’t waste your time here.” Your croaky voice snapped him out of his train of thoughts. “You can go Connor; I will be fine.”

“Can I stay? I want to be with you.” he pleaded.

Your vision once fixated on the wall now focused on him, hollowness seeped through your eyes, a sharp contrast to how they looked the first time he met you.

“Connor…”

“Please. Please, don’t push me away.”

You blinked and bit your dry lip. After thinking for a few minutes, you said, “Okay. Okay, you can stay.”

+

The following day he’d made you breakfast, or at least tried. The food looked nice since he’d followed an online tutorial, but he wasn’t sure about the taste.

You didn’t look happy nor sad about him cooking for you but barely ate half of what he made.

“Fucking hell.” You said under your breath, he didn’t know if it was because of what he made or because of how physically and mentally tired you look.

Last night wasn’t mentioned. He didn’t say anything, and you didn’t bring it up, so he thought you didn’t want to talk about it.

“Thanks.” You said suddenly after you finished eating, “For, for looking out for me, I mean.”

He nodded, “You don’t have to thank me. I only wanted to make sure you were okay, I’m sorry for pressuring you.”

He had done his research as you begrudgingly slept, understood that what happened to you was known as a panic attack. He’d delved deeper into it to understand what caused the shift in your personality, but he still was not a licensed therapist or the kind of android made for that purpose and thus he didn’t want to make assumptions.

You scoffed, “No, it was my fault. I… usually get snappy when this happens. I still shouldn’t have said what I said. I’m sorry. Just don’t scan me all the time, okay?” “Okay.”

He tilted his head after a while, “Is it okay if I ask you a personal question?”

“Sure.”

“Has this happened before?”

You froze. “Does it matter?”

The way you spoke was rather deadpan, “Well, yes. But if you don’t wish to talk about it, it’s fine.”

“I’d like that. I don’t… I’m not ready to talk about it.”

Connor put his hand on yours and rubbed it, “It’s okay.”

+

Day by day he’d try to show you that he appreciated you. That he did not see you as a burden. That you mattered to him. It was hard, your self-doubt and lack of any sense of personal worth created a wall that he had to carefully try to breakdown. He did want to advise you to seek professional help, but you seemed defensive when he suggested it the first time.

You started showing up to work again after a while, you still did not show much passion for it and looked incredibly uncomfortable when someone would question you about it. So, he’d try his best to push people off your back, as awkward as it was. 

+

Rain was pouring outside. Connor could hear splashes and vehicles passing by every second. It was rather peaceful. Your head rested on his thigh as he hummed a tune he recalled hearing you sing a few months ago.

“Connor.”

“Hm?”

“What’s wrong with me?”

Your question made him pause, you sounded almost… empty. Devoid of any actual emotion like someone who was internally defeated.

“I kept denying it for so long. Kept telling myself that today was just a bad day, tomorrow will be better,” you let out an unsteady breath, “But it never did. Everything became so… joyless? I couldn’t enjoy things, couldn’t enjoy work, couldn’t enjoy any shows, couldn’t enjoy speaking to anyone.”

Connor slowly realized that you were opening up to him, so he listened thoroughly and stayed quiet.

“Things only got worse. I didn’t have it in me to do anything anymore. I didn’t keep up with work, didn’t clean my apartment, didn’t cook, didn’t eat, didn’t do anything. I felt gross.”

 You sniffled and lifted your head, “I didn’t want to bother anyone with it. Thought It would go away, that nobody deserved to be forced to help someone like me. didn’t want them to see me any differently.”

“I am just so fuckin’ tired, ya know? It’s like I am running in a circle. I’m tired of being so worthless. I’m tired, Con. I just want it to stop.”

You looked down at your lap while Connor started to comprehend what you were saying. His LED spun and circled until it settled on yellow. “This does not make me view you any differently. You are still the person who helped me when I deviated,”

He held your hand and you latched on to him, letting out soft whimpers as he rubbed your back. “I might not completely understand what you are going through, but I still care about you and I want to help.”

“But I am not the crucial help you need.” You stopped crying into his chest and looked up at him in confusion. “I know you think it might be useless but please consider attending therapy. I will tag along if it will make it more comfortable for you.”

You stayed quiet, this time actually considering what he offered. “what if they didn’t care?”

“Then we will look for the right person. Together.”

You bit your lower lip and hesitantly nodded, “You will be with me, Con?” your fingers intertwined, and he pressed his forehead against yours.

 “Yes. Every step of the way.”

[punkscowardschampions]

Joe & Ronnie

Joe: Hey

Joe: my flatmate has some work I reckon your mate might be interested in

Joe: but it’ll sound a bit dodgy coming from me so you wanna pass it along?

Joe: moneys alright for no real work, depending on how you look at it

Ronnie: never done any work as a secretary myself

Ronnie: write your own fucking love notes

Joe: I see that

Joe: your accent down the 📞?

Joe: no cunt here’d understand you, never mind the demeanour

Joe: yeah, well, it’d really seem that way

Joe: but I actually need someone to take her off my hands

Ronnie: racism as foreplays playing to the wrong crowd hes more into homo bashing

Ronnie: errr dunno how you read his demeanor mckenna but he aint taken a her off anyones hands since before any of us had phones

Joe: i’ll keep that in mind

Joe: well homophobic of me to not tell him myself so he’s welcome for the freebie

Joe: not actual escorting

Joe: she does art, her life drawing class needs a model

Joe: I ain’t fucking doing that

Joe: tell me I ain’t 📖 him right on that one

Ronnie: fucks sake if youd said it was cash for cock wed be done talking already

Joe: I just did

Joe: sound, she’ll be made up, she’ll get off my case, and he’ll get £15 an hour, apparently 👌

Ronnie: sexist not to ask me

Ronnie: pass that on to your little gf

Joe: weren’t her idea to ask Charlie

Joe: you’ll have to take up that grievance with me as well

Joe: I’ll just point out it’d be even weirder if I’d have asked you

Ronnie: you wish

Ronnie: how much £ you offering me to bang you

Joe: if I did no point paying you to do it for her and her class and not me

Joe: that’s an interesting take on cucking though, loads that would go for it, I’m sure

Ronnie: ill write it down as youve made me go hunting for a pen in this shithole

Joe: cheers

Joe: take 20% commission or whatever

Joe: or take the IOU I owe him for doing this

Ronnie: you said it hed do this for fuck all ill take the lot and mary wont know it was a paid gig

Joe: if he can fend the flatmate off, undoubtedly a load of art gays he can have his pick of

Ronnie: that what youre telling yourself for why you dont want me to do it yeah

Joe: you wanna do it?

Ronnie: i want you to admit the reason you dont want me to is cause he scrubs up enough for horse girl and her course mates not to stage an intervention

Joe: not what it is so no

Joe: I know I don’t want to get my shit out in front of a load of middle class kids who know fuck all about fuck all, so I assumed as much for you

Ronnie: dont ever assume fuck all for or about me

Joe: why do you wanna do it so bad when like you said, you can pocket the cash and get him to?

Ronnie: i dont wanna fucking do it

Joe: well that’s grand ‘cos I reckon Sophie wants to see dick so

Joe: she’d be really let down

Ronnie: usually what gets you off

Ronnie: but im made up youre in love now like

Joe: please, she either don’t get it’s weird to ask me which means she’s some kind of special

Joe: or this is the start of her 50 shades fantasy and I have to be the let down to end all let downs and i’m already doing my best

Ronnie: rem is right to pay for it when she could just walk in on you taking a piss or having a shower

Joe: when you’re just a creep and not a predator 💔

Joe: not the girl my parents warned me about

Ronnie: if theyd be the type to go down the stables theyd have seen the other side of her

Joe: you’ve got your own daydreams, alright

Joe: put out the feelers, who isn’t a little gay these days, right

Ronnie: go ed and pass on ive got a bigger dick than him and she will have

Ronnie: i dont dream 💔

Joe: shame she isn’t equally inspiring for you

Joe: or anyone, really

Ronnie: cry about it with him when youre done pimping

Joe: what do you dream about then, when you’re awake

Ronnie: what you cant read me

Joe: clearly not

Joe: dashed your modelling dreams

Ronnie: blind and not able to read braille must be dead hard for you

Joe: is that sympathy?

Joe: or you offering me 🖐 to 👩🏼‍🦲 time

Ronnie: again you wish

Ronnie: 💭💉

Ronnie: cant make it any easier to understand soz

Joe: maybe I do

Joe: far as 💭s go

Ronnie: fuck maybe you do or you dont

Joe: well it ain’t why I don’t want to get my arms out for her

Joe: not tried it

Joe: but not a no

Ronnie: give a shit what you do or dont want to do for or to her

Joe: that is a no, tah

Ronnie: tell her not me baby

Joe: that’s not a big sister duty?

Joe: gutted

Ronnie: wouldnt know im the middle kid dorothy does that for us

Joe: i’ll ask him when i’m crying on him then

Joe: make a change for me

Ronnie: hot

Ronnie: rack up the ious like a fat line hes gonna be made up

Joe: oi he’s like family ain’t he

Ronnie: &

Ronnie: you wanna fuck your mam

Ronnie: not oi ing you

Joe: well you get to think about me and him, you gave me her and you, not fair

Ronnie: life aint soft lad

Ronnie: and stopping at thinking about shit is the difference between me and you

Joe: I get it, you’ve gone there

Joe: purely here for the homophobia

Ronnie: your kinks match 💘

Ronnie: purely there so the lads dont kick off before hes got his kicks

Joe: see, you’ve got it in you 💘

Joe: the sisterly thing

Joe: my hate don’t get expressed by putting me in him though so I won’t run my mouth

Ronnie: not what ive got in me but im not giving you the talk just cause your ma didnt

Joe: you want a virgin to defile reckon Soph and her mates are prime, vampira

Ronnie: set it up with her ill show if i get no better offers

Joe: lucky girl

Joe: no more nights in doing doodles of cute girls that look like you

Ronnie: we dont look alike youll have to accept theyre of you

Joe: i fit less than you, by far

Ronnie: fuck off

Joe: sorry

Joe: it’s weird, say the least

Ronnie: i fit nowhere she made sure i dont

Joe: ditto

Joe: so buzzing i can write shit songs about it though

Ronnie: no

Ronnie: weve got fuck all in common

Joe: just the same mother

Joe: who put her shitty genetics and choices on us both at different times

Ronnie: i ain’t got a mother you cant cross out the un from wanted and act like its the same word

Joe: incubator then

Joe: she was 19 and still fucked, don’t think they had a five-year plan down

Joe: worse if she did, the state of

Ronnie: she made 1 choice for me shes still controlling you

Ronnie: were not the fucking same

Joe: you reckon

Ronnie: if you wanna claim it aint her fault youre this big of a pussy try it

Joe: you don’t think it’s my fault?

Joe: woah, just say you love me

Ronnie: i dont think about you when you aint trying to compare us

Joe: hot

Joe: I’ve thought about you plenty

Joe: uni ain’t that interesting

Ronnie: you came looking for me werent the other way round

Ronnie: you ain’t interesting to me mckenna

Joe: you reckon you’re fascinating, yeah?

Joe: fair enough

Ronnie: if your flatmate knows anyone doing doc film making they can wank over me lying in the gutter when youre done

Joe: nah

Joe: you don’t want control of your narrative

Ronnie: i dont want a narrative

Joe: then i’ll be the only wanker

Ronnie: in your dreams

Joe: well you painted such a lovely visual

Ronnie: black screen would get you going can stay in your own fucked head with no interference then like

Joe: Static is my kink

Joe: you know me so well

Ronnie: your fucking kink is not shutting the hell up til i do

Joe: i’m a gentleman

Joe: and i’m taking that review

Ronnie: youll get a lengthy one from my big brother when you are

Joe: you don’t have to settle for hearing it and getting your kicks second-hand

Joe: I’ll have to be somewhere to be unavailable for this life drawing class

Joe: let’s do something

Ronnie: what you paying me to babysit

Joe: you can ask my mammy or you can see what you can get

Ronnie: if i was gonna talk to her it wouldnt be about you

Joe: thank god

Joe: so take the risk

Ronnie: of what

Ronnie: boring me is asking too much of you

Joe: that’s surely a given

Joe: risk anything but

Ronnie: if I need rescuing again ill call you thats the only given Joe: you’re worse than her

Joe: christian grey or superman, like

Joe: gonna be BFFs yous, I can tell

Ronnie: you dont like being compared to cunts youre nothing like either funny that

Joe: touche

Joe: come on, what would convince you

Ronnie: if youre gonna beg then beg and if youre gonna show me something do it

Joe: I know you’d like to hear me beg but I can’t tell what you’d wanna see

Ronnie: then the answers nothing

Joe: nah

Joe: the answers you want to wait or you wanna be disappointed

Ronnie: why the fuck would I want either of those things

Joe: that’s what I’ll give you then

Joe: the opposite of that

Ronnie: thats meant to convince me yeah

Joe: nah, I am

Ronnie: like fuck will you

Joe: see, you want to be disappointed

Ronnie: ill be disappointed want has fuck all to do with it

Joe: if you don’t come and see

Ronnie: come where

Joe: see me

Joe: i’m new in town, I don’t know where to go

Joe: fuck sightseeing

Ronnie: [somewhere she’d hang out]

Ronnie: go there

Joe: now?

Ronnie: whenever you dont know where to go

Joe: okay

Joe: and I’ll see you there when you don’t

Ronnie: when im not fucking either of our flatmates

Joe: when you’re done being disappointed

Ronnie: when you prove yourself as not

Joe: you’ll see

Joe: I can’t show you over the phone

Ronnie: you could

Ronnie: im going nowhere on a bullshit promise cause im not a meff teenager

Joe: and I ain’t young enough to think that’s a good idea either

Joe: pictures not doing no favours

Joe: if you’re there and i’m there

Ronnie: big if

Joe: I never know where to be

Ronnie: newborn i heard you

Joe: something like that

Joe: if you can’t leave soph alone I’ll do my best begging 🥺

Ronnie: she cant leave you alone id be doing you a favour

Joe: true

Joe: wouldn’t wanna be caught doing that though

Ronnie: let you do the clean up after ive killed and ate her id be caught well fast for that instead

Joe: you’d get caught for being three times your size

Joe: she’s a big girl

Joe: you should share, be sworn to secrecy

Ronnie: doing her a favour i shouldve said

Ronnie: fuck all going for her

Joe: way to get in shape

Joe: she’ll appreciate us using her blood for something artsy on the walls

Ronnie: ill ask the basic white bitch i live with to give me a clue

Joe: 🍆 will be appropriate for her

Ronnie: 🐎

Joe: they might reckon she did it with her dying breath

Joe: very artist of her, dying how she lived

Ronnie: hurry the fuck up with your confession song if you want credit

Joe: you wanna hear me confessing so bad

Joe: but I might be able to hand that in so

Joe: hold on

Ronnie: it aint me whos a choir boy

Joe: ugh, I wish

Ronnie: cant chat shit about us having the same fantasies ive been touched by a old bloke wearing a dress and i dont rate it

Ronnie: standard surrounded by homos night out

Joe: yeah, and the nuns are never the hot kind

Joe: if they didn’t self-flagellate they’d be entirely uninteresting

Ronnie: 💔

Joe: yeah, it’s tragic being this bored/boring, say it ‘fore you have to bother

Ronnie: didnt invite you to no pity party and if thats where youre trying to get me to turn up to dont bother is right

Joe: you mean you don’t wanna talk about your feelings?

Joe: like you said, like being left alone with my own fucked up ones too much to try and start a therapy session

Ronnie: what fucking feelings dead above & below the waist like

Joe: dangerously close to sharing there

Joe: you got your 💉 already then?

Ronnie: wouldnt be this chatty if i had

Ronnie: unlucky you

Joe: I’m the one that wants to see you

Joe: so I’ll cope

Ronnie: cant even spell martyrdom proper so youve fucked yourself looking for a pat on the back off me by matching the definition up

Joe: i’ll just ring mum up yeah

Ronnie: your da if not but it wont have the same satisfying end for you like

Joe: 💔

Joe: validations the last thing i need

Joe: had a whole lifetime

Ronnie: you crawling back to me with a boner for the accent your mummys losing is the last thing i need

Ronnie: get on the scouse samaritans

Joe: don’t reckon that’s a job you’ll get any time soon either

Joe: ‘less the purpose is to make sure people go through with it

Ronnie: couldve fooled me if it aint what else is talking a sad cunts ear off about their problems gonna do

Joe: attention seekers anonymous

Ronnie: no need to meet you there i earned all them badges as a kid 🧷🩸

Joe: wouldn’t be caught 💀 obvs

Joe: keeping it secret adds another level of masochism anyway

Ronnie: does it fuck

Ronnie: keeps you feeling like a smug bitch you can still pass

Ronnie: miss me with that pussy shit

Joe: nah, that’s that i’m in control shit

Joe: it’s not that

Joe: the only thing you might be smug about is how oblivious everyone chooses to be

Joe: if it weren’t also depressing as fuck

Ronnie: dont give em the choice

Joe: why?

Ronnie: why the fuck would you want to

Joe: don’t need to be my mother’s next cause celebre

Joe: she can force the therapy and concern on any of the others, I don’t wanna get better or have to fake like I’ll even try

Ronnie: then dont

Ronnie: cut off your umbilical cord and wipe up the blood trail

Ronnie: not like she tries very hard to herd back the black sheep

Joe: maybe they know and don’t give a fuck 🤞

Joe: I know I ain’t going back so whatever

Ronnie: & you reckon weve got anything in common

Joe: just 50% of our DNA

Joe: never said we were twinsies

Ronnie: if youd have said id have spat in your face 1st time we met get it collected and the tests run

Joe: I wish

Joe: has your face healed

Ronnie: wheres the fun in letting it do that

Joe: 😏

Joe: we can pretend that’s inherited if you need

Ronnie: not 5 i dont play pretend

Joe: if you keep digging, reckon the ink will be gone and it’ll be pure scar tissue

Ronnie: calm the fuck down i can hear how turned on you are about it from here

Joe: spoilsport

Joe: just thinking, scar that only vaguely looks like 🍒s might be well more rugged for my transformation from baby to independent real boy

Ronnie: laughing cos i like pain not cause youre funny

Ronnie: when you see or hear it from wherever youre lurking

Joe: you don’t leave room for me to get the wrong idea, you’re alright

Joe: all them fucked ones are mine alone and already there

Ronnie: get your girlfriend to draw you a pin up & dont tell her youve changed the lass horse head to look like your mas

Ronnie: masc for masc in your bio before you know it and 🦋 tramp stamp to follow

Joe: you know my dad already has a tattoo that looks like her, no bullshit

Joe: and another dead girl on the other arm but that’s a whole other boring story

Joe: playing dress up is off the cards too if I’m ever gonna be a big boy

Ronnie: where do you keep his severed arm when youre not using it to fist yourself and how old were you when you cut it off

Ronnie: if we re telling stories

Joe: 😂

Joe: where we keep the horse

Joe: that en-suite is massive

Ronnie: if he finds out it was a paid gig ill know where to crash

Joe: still gutted she don’t wanna see you naked

Ronnie: youre a liar if you dont wanna see her face seeing me

Joe: don’t know if anyone could be bothered to look at her when you’re about but yeah

Joe: the trauma would really fuel me and make her much more bearable to live with

Ronnie: youre welcome like

Joe: gotta stop being nice to me

Joe: you know stalkers, give ‘em an inch

Ronnie: telling me what to do is the fastest way 🖕

Ronnie: and i know you dont have an inch to give me making the best of this shitshow is what an optimist like me has gotta do

Joe: obviously you’re that type

Joe: not having it in common will have you back 👍

Joe: you’re inspiring, like

Ronnie: chop off my arms and legs and get a camera set up in the en-suite

Joe: you’d fit in my cello case then, could take you everywhere

Ronnie: course youve had a measuring tape out

Joe: hate to kill your optimism with 🍆

Joe: have a go at pushing it back in

Ronnie: how longs your tongue reckon that could kill any girls optimism

Joe: 💔 if it was only good for chatting your ear off

Ronnie: [send him a picture of your weird gross split tongue because obviously]

Joe: [how does that not make you lisp, or does it, I always think that]

Joe: that’s why you’ve not had an invite

Joe: 🚫🐍

Ronnie: gutted

Joe: you know you can show up and do whatever you wanna do whenever

Joe: I’ll take you back

Ronnie: this performance art is meant to what just scare her or teach you how to get her to back the fuck off as well as

Ronnie: im not a fucking tour guide mckenna & you can get yourself evicted without my help

Joe: you know I meant to Dublin

Joe: don’t think it’d take much to scare Sophie off, give it a month for us to both get comfortable and she’ll see what I ain’t

Ronnie: fuck you

Joe: I said if you want

Ronnie: dont need your permission to do anything i want

Joe: don’t think any of ‘em are that lax with their socials

Joe: you’d need directions

Ronnie: ive had years to find em & we dont both hang about with horse girls from kent

Joe: can’t say it’s your loss

Ronnie: shut up about it then

Joe: 🤐

Ronnie: 🖕

Joe: got a whole fist here, you can keep it

Ronnie: sizeist

Joe: told her yours is massive like you said, it’s fine

Ronnie: i said bigger than his not a horse shes in for a disappointment

Joe: gotta 🤞 she’s an optimist like you babe

Ronnie: unlike you shes gonna wait to see what i do with it before telling me to shove it

Joe: you just wanna blueball me for the pain

Joe: go on, for your lols

Ronnie: she wont want me at all unless youre gonna watch

Joe: and you need a witness so I get time too

Joe: I’ll do it, torturous as it’d be

Ronnie: the iou is gonna torture me too

Joe: if you’re lucky

Ronnie: not the dna half we share 💔

Joe: damnit

Joe: what’s good about being Scouse?

Ronnie: now the beatles are dead youve got fuck all to live for

Ronnie: noted

Joe: only the good ones

Joe: I dunno, anything good about it never happened, left when I was a kid and we still lived in a shithole with shitheads

Ronnie: get in line she left me in a shithole with shitheads 1st

Joe: where were you

Joe: wonder how close it was

Ronnie: what the fuck does it matter

Joe: it makes her more/less shitty depending

Ronnie: it aint gonna change my opinion and I dont give a shit about yours

Joe: fair enough

Ronnie: get cosy with charlie hed take you down memory lane

Joe: not before he’s got it out for the art class tah

Ronnie: you didnt say when

Joe: [probably an evening class like tomorrow or the next day, then the same time a week later]

Ronnie: too fucking late the pen is in pieces

Joe: sure it isn’t the first time you’ve left him a note in blood

Ronnie: hes only gonna cry about it & take the shine off his modelling debut

Joe: awh

Joe: message him 🧓🏼

Ronnie: fuck off calling me old

Joe: 😏

Ronnie: ill write him a note blaming what a twat you are for what hes gonna walk in on

Joe: what mess have you made

Ronnie: havent killed myself yet

Joe: and you’ve not stopped talking so no OD’ing

Joe: possibilities are endless still

Ronnie: yeah

Joe: come out

Joe: we can get new ink to dig out

Joe: whatever

Ronnie: you gonna suck his dick this time

Joe: I’ll just pay the old-fashioned way

Ronnie: flashy cunt

Joe: what being a student is all about

Ronnie: and youre too special to poison your blood how the rest of em do

Joe: I’m not opposed but I can do it alone, I don’t need to go to a sweaty student bar that plays shit songs and has a load of sad Soph clones giving it 🥺

Ronnie: you can get another tattoo without me holding your hand

Joe: I could

Ronnie: go do it 🦋 baby

Joe: have mentioned its not about the tat, yeah?

Ronnie: nah not that ive heard

Joe: come on

Joe: i want to see you, i’ve said loads

Ronnie: youve said loads of shit yeah

Joe: shit i mean

Ronnie: why

Joe: why wouldn’t I

Ronnie: thats your answer then fuck it

Joe: you don’t need to ask ‘cos you know

Ronnie: i did ask and you said why the fuck not

Ronnie: like its nothing

Ronnie: like you didnt turn up uninvited into my life not long ago

Joe: then tell me to leave

Joe: like it’s that easy

Ronnie: i didnt tell you to fucking appear

Ronnie: just cause youre a kid dont make me the dead fish you won at the fair

Joe: I never had the choice

Joe: she told me about you, talked about you all the fucking time

Joe: you’ve always been in my life

Ronnie: and youve never been in mine

Ronnie: im not gonna carve out a place for you now cos you want it

Joe: Alright

Joe: do it then

Ronnie: dont tell me what to fucking do

Joe: I’m not going unless you say it

Ronnie: no shit this is fun for you

Joe: like fuck it is

Ronnie: im the car wreck youre craning your neck to keep looking at

Ronnie: thats all the fuck this is

Joe: lie better

Ronnie: you dont care about me or what this feels like

Joe: I can’t take it back, you know now

Ronnie: you dont wanna take it back

Joe: I can’t, what’s the point pretending

Joe: I never said I was a good person

Joe: being sorry won’t change anything for you

Ronnie: its all your christmases & birthdays im west as this course youre gonna keep on spinning me out

Joe: Piss off

Ronnie: lie better cunt

Joe: So you’re allowed pity parties, yeah?

Joe: 👌

Ronnie: calling you out on your bullshit is allowed if youre crying thats your problem

Joe: if all you want from me is for me to go away, consider it done

Joe: you can’t hack it, my apologies

Ronnie: tell me why if im so fucking wrong

Joe: I like you

Joe: I want you, to get to know you

Joe: I can’t just stop it, not for myself

Joe: So make me

Ronnie: stop telling me what to fucking do

Ronnie: fucks sake

Joe: you ain’t saying anything

Joe: what do you want

Ronnie: I dont want you to like me

Ronnie: fuck is that

Joe: yeah, it’s obvious you go to great lengths to be unlikeable

Joe: not going to tell no one am I

Ronnie: so hate me soft lad

Joe: I’ll give it a go

Ronnie: ill make you

Joe: give it a go then

Ronnie: where are you then

Joe: [give a location of somewhere near your flat ‘cos don’t need to actually set you on the flatmate rn and that’s likely where you were]

Ronnie: [obviously we’re just gonna show up however long that takes us without another word like !?]

Joe: [just so much eye contact ‘cos what you gonna say what you gonna do]

Ronnie: [definitely gonna take him somewhere sketchy as hell to the level that like Charlie doesn’t know we still go there/we’d never take him ever like you wanna get to know me okay bitch buckle up]

Joe: [can’t let you hook up or shoot up yet ‘cos chronological but go along with this obvs]

Ronnie: [it would make sense if you made out/almost hooked up though because the vibe for the next convo was very much oh fuck what are you doing here we didn’t mean to run each other like this but also v flirty]

Joe: [agreed, and allowed, it’s the obvious vibe but any untold drama can happen to stop you in whatever dodgy place so makes sense]

Ronnie: [literally and just because you can’t shoot up together yet does not mean either of you have to be in any way sober so]

Joe: [hundo, we’re not saying he’s never done a drug lol, he clearly abuses his prescription as is so like, there’s plenty to be done without going there]

Ronnie: [and if we wanted to we could say that you watch her do it here and now before you do it together anyway because you’d both get a weird kick out of that]

Joe: [tea, bet you did not see this coming for your uni experience lmao]

Ronnie: [meanwhile she’s old enough to have left, do you wanna grow up babe? No? okay]

Joe: [the way you’re rolling with this, we know you’re fucked boy but pop off]

Ronnie: [I can’t overstate how much she’d be doing the absolute most to try and scare him away like I dare you to go back on what you said]

Joe: [we know you’re not gonna, soz babe, is very rude how he’s just waltzed in but truly did not say we were a good person lol]

Ronnie: [we know she’s not either and also is here for it more than she will ever express until we’re literally years into this]

Joe: [hi your mother’s daughter, but no, you actually have a reason this is messed up but we’re into it from the off and not pretending, risky af strategy boy]

Ronnie: [is there anything we wanna say happens that has lasting-ish consequences other than the make out/ almost hook up ie a tattoo or a fight with injury potential or an arrest lol]

Joe: [hmm, the possibilities, maybe a fight to show you can, could be about anything, it’s that sort of place]

Ronnie: [that is such a mood I love it and yeah could literally be you’re a new face or could be her fault because of the aforementioned doing the most]

Joe: [totally, and that’ll be an easy way to separate you and not meet until the next convo]

Ronnie: [exactly dr phil]

[patterns-stuff69]

Dance on my grave

Chapter 3

-----------------------

Me and Shoto had grown really close this week. I felt so sad when I had to go back to class because I wouldn't be able to see  Shoto. His class was going on a camping trip.

I found out these feelings I felt for him was love.

How strange... I thought I would never be able to love someone romantically in my life.

I was staring at the board blankly. I was really bored and lonely. I was strong enough for my nurse to ket me go to class alone.

It was a new thing for me, but I didnt mind.

Mt mental health went down drastically though. The kids made fun of my illness and even shoved me around.

They kept saying that I'll never do anything great because I was so sickly and weak.

It really hurt me. I started to believe those statements. My nurse wondered what was wrong but I never told her.

I didn't want to bother her with my silly problems.

I wasnt worth any human sympathy, so why should I waste her's?

I hide my feelings and troubles from my therapist too. He doesn't even suspect a thing.

I sighed as I wrote down what Present Mic told us to.

I started to feel my eyes fall closed and my breathing became shallow. I passed out at my desk.

I soon woke up in a hospital bed, connected to a heart monitor and life support.

A light went off and a group of nurses rush on with a doctor.

My parents werent there. There was nothing that told me that they visited.

Just as I thought. I was a waste of space. A bother. Not even my parents wanted to see me.

Thwy hate me. Everyone hates me. Even Shoto.

I sighed in relief when the nurses exited. They left me alone with my personal nurse. She turned the TV on for me.

Thwy were talking about Shoto.

I spotted his last name.

It took a bit to click, but when it did, I freaked out.

He's a Todoroki?!

Why didn't he tell me that? Did something bad happen?

I was so surprised. I decided to ask him when I exited the hospital.

Who knows how long I'll stay in this place.

------

I heard that Midoriya was in hospital. He apparently fainted in class due to his oxygen running out.

How dumb could his nurse be?

I sighed as I took my red and white hair out of my face. I wanted to see the TV better.

My heart sank when I heard that I was on the news.

Midoriya would surely know that I'm a Todoroki. That'll scare him off. I dont want that... I've grown feelings for him.

I can't loose him, not yet.

Chapter 4

------------------------

I was out of hospital and back at school.  I feel like Shoto is ignoring me... and it hurts.

I was just walking to the cafeteria when I saw Shoto talking with that black haired girl from 1-A. I think her name was Momo.

Momo was giggling and blushing while Todoroki was looking at her like a boyfriend would.

My heart sank and I just rushed out of the cafeteria. Tears were brimming my eyes.

Why am I crying? Why does it hurt so much?

My nurse tried to follow me, but she couldnt. I ran into the boys bathroom, locking thr door. I went to a stall and closed it's door. I just started ro cry.

Why am I feeling this much pain?

Why does it hurt so much to see Shoto with her?

My heart monitor started beeping loudly.

I guess this had put a lot of stress on me.

What am I going to do now? I thought he cared about me.... but now he's ignoring and avoiding me.

Did I do something wrong?

I knew it.... he was just pretending. He actually hates me and that teddy bear was a fake gift. He didnt want to tell me his last name because he didnt want me to ruin his image.

I should just leave... forever. It'll make everything easier for everyone... especially mom and dad.

My vision was starting to become a lot more foggy and blurry. My breathing became unsteady and really quick.

It feels like something pressing on my chest. Why does it hurt this much?

I started screaming for the first time in the longest time.

It hurts a lot more than my illness. It feels like my heart is shattering.

Am I dying?

Maybe I am... that'll be amazing...

Before I knew it, I was passed out. The last thing I heard was the door unlocking. I saw a blurry face. They had red and white hair.

-----

I found Midoriya's nurse at the boys bathroom. She was looking at me with worried and angry eyes.

She pointed at the door  "Help me open the door... please. He's in there. He looked troubled."

Before I could kick the door down, I heard a scream come from behind the door.

My heart sank and I froze the door handle. I opened the door and found Midoriya on the floor. His breathing was heavy and unsteady. He looked like he was having a panic attack.

"I think he passed out from a panic attack. We need to get him to the hospital." I spoke softly. I didnt want the nurse to know that I was scared. I need to remain strong... for Midoriya's sake.

We were in the hospital a few hours later. Midoriya was hooked up on life support and they had to put him into an induced coma.

I don't know why, but they had to.

I took Midoriya's hand into mine ans sighed shakily "I'm so sorry Midoriya... I dont know what caused you to freak out like this.... but.... it was probably my fault."

I asked the nurses to leave me alone with Midoriya for a bit. I wanted to tell him how I felt... I dont care if he couldn't respond. I needed to tell him.

I was talking with Momo to figure out how to ask someone out. She helped me by being a test subject.

I pretended that she was Midoriya. I confessed to her and she smiled, telling me that Midoriya would love what I told her.

I looked at Midoriya, sighing shakily. I brought his hand up to my forehead, starting ro cry, "I'm so so sorry....Midoriya... please.... forgive me for whatever I did.... I.... I love you so much... I know we've only known each other for a short time now.... but... I'm sure that I've fallen for you... When... when they used my last name on the news... I was scared that you would leave me alone.... just because I was a Todoroki..." I took a breath.

"I started to avoid you.... but... that was a mistake... Midoriya... please forgive me... I know you probably dont feel the same.... but I love you..." I sounded so damn sad and desperate.

Damn it. I promised myself that I wouldnt cry.

I then felt Midoriya's hand tighten on my hand.

I looked up at him, sniffling. I saw that he had a soft smile on his face and tears falling from his eyes.

He was still asleep though. I knew that he heard me.

Thank you....

-------

I somehow heard Todoroki confess to me. I tried to wake up, but I couldnt.

I used all of my strength to squeeze his hand and smile. I felt tears fall from my eyes.

I felt happy and complete.

Chapter 5

------------------------

It's been a month now and Midoriya was awake.

It was a relief to know that. He also accepted my feelings for him. He likes me too, surprisingly.

I felt the happiest I've ever felt in my life.... this is amazing.

I was chased out of his room though. They needed to check up on him and it seems that he doesnt need his personal nurse anymore.

The school is gonna let us share our dorms so that I can take care of him.

I was pretty happy about that. He also seemed way happier.

I was hugging him while he was catching up on work. He looked so cute when he focused. I really like it when he looks like this.

I nuzzled into his back and let ou a hum "Do you need any help Izu?"

Midoriya smiled softly and shook his head "Not really Sho.... I'm doing quite well." He mumbled.

I nodded and kissed his bacl softly before drifting off into sleep.

After a few hours, I felt two arms wrap around me. I opened my eyes and saw Midoriya hugging me. He was smiling softly "Hey Sho..... Sorry for waking you up."

I smiled and shook my head "It's fine. Are you tired?"

He nodded and nuzzled into my chest "Yes.... I'm very tired...." he yawned and closed his eyes, falling asleep.

He was getting tired a lot more easily thesw past few months. I wasnt really concerned about that. He told me that if he didnt feel well that he'll tell me.

I never thought anything of this, until he didnt respond to me the next morning.

I tried to wake him up, but he kept sleeping.

I called the hospital and a nurse who was accompanied with a doctor arrived.

They checked up on Midoriya and they frowned.

The doctor looked at me "He needs to be hospitalized again. His condition has gotten worse."

I tensed up and nodded "A-Alright..."

This cant be happening again. I cant lose him now.