#that is my fiance and I am going to love him more than she ever did

[roboraindrop]

Sorry about f/o hopping like a fuckin madman rn but holy shit I'm so glad that Chucky is mine. I'm so devoted to this man... I want to kiss him more than anything rn

[spookydrreid]

Let’s Start the New Year Right

Spencer Reid x fem!reader

18+ minors DNI

desc: Spencer and reader get invited to a chill, casual NYE party. But things heat up right at the stroke of midnight.

cw: food mention, Spencer is a little awkward in the beginning, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, semi-public sex (in a bathroom)... Let me know if I missed anything

wc: 1667

...

“I can’t go dressed like this? People will laugh at me.” 

Spencer looks himself over in the mirror for the tenth time, running a hand down his sweatshirt. It was New Years Eve and you two weren’t doing anything too crazy, just spending time at your friend Andies house with a few others. She’d just bought said house and was desperate for you and the rest of your friends to see it. And what better time than New Year's Eve?

“They will not laugh at you. Andie said she wanted everyone to be casual and casual means jeans and sweatshirts,” you called from inside your closet. “And we’ll be out by the fire. You’ll be more comfortable like this. Trust me.” 

You peak around the corner to his portion of the closet, a small smile tugging at your lips. He looks cute, more dressed down than you usually see him. In fact, this is the most you’ve seen him in the past three weeks. Serial killers don’t take breaks, even during the holidays. So off he and the team went to bum-fuck-nowhere Alabama and missed Christmas.

It was disappointing to say the least. 

But it was his job, something he warned you of previously. However, it didn’t mean him missing important days didn’t hurt. But you sucked it up and smiled through it. Plus, it didn’t matter. He was home and he was safe. 

“I do trust you. But I don’t want to be underdressed.” He sighs moving to grab his tennis shoes, sitting on the little poof seat you insisted on buying. (And that he secretly loved. Not that he’d admit it.) 

You pull your hair out of the back of your sweatshirt, smoothing it down and grabbing a warm hat. “You won’t be. This isn’t like Rossi’s where we dress to the nines and get drunk on champagne.” 

You see him grin as he ties his shoes, a small blush rising on his ears. 

“Yeah he was sad we were coming this year. I, however, am excited we aren’t going. I have spent more than enough time with all of them. They’ll survive without me for a night.” 

You giggle, walking towards him and hugging him from behind. “Yes, baby, your friends will survive without you. You’re all mine tonight.” You kiss his cheek before straightening and checking your phone, “we should head out, sweetheart. Andie will be pissed if we’re late.” 

The drive to Andies was short, filled with Spencer's long winded explanation about why you and he bought your house at the ‘most perfect time’. You loved listening to him ramble, even if half the time he spoke gibberish. You were thankful you could google some of the super big words he used. 

The second you’re parked outside the house, big, beautiful and full of holiday cheer, you see Spencer tense. You’d think after six years together, he’d be more calm around your friends. They helped him with the proposal after all and he still has the group chat. The group chat where they send him memes he doesn’t understand. However, no matter the time, he isn’t the most comfortable with anyone but you. And more so in your bedroom. 

You find it… endearing to say the least. 

You reach over and grab his hand, squeezing it three times i am here. “Ready?” 

He squeezes back and nods, “I am… I think.” 

It’s all you need before getting out and never once letting go of Spencer’s hand. 

Andie stands at the door, smile on her face, two glasses of punch in her hands. “There is my best friend and her hot as fuck fiance!”

Spencer practically cringes at her words, never being one who could handle a compliment. Even if he was the most beautiful human you’ve ever seen. 

“Hi! Sorry we’re late. We had a late night. You know how it is, serial killers killing during the holidays. Dr. Reid forever having to save the day.” You pat his chest, looking up at him fondly. 

He loves when you look at him like that, eyes so wide, filled to the brim with love. He kisses your head and 

Andie fake gags, handing you the drinks in her hand. “Yes, yes. Get inside before we let the kitten out and before the cold air comes in.” 

You sip it, the vodka making your chest feel warm. Spencer looks down at the cup before looking back at you, “I can’t drink. Want this?” You nod, taking it and pouring it into your cup. “A-andie do you have water? Bottled? I don’t like sink water and fridge water tastes funny so bottled is better. Even though it’s not good for the environment.

“But it’s not really us that needs to worry. It’s the famous people who really pollute the envi-” 

Andie cuts him off, “Spencie baby, you don’t have to explain this to me. I have plenty of bottled water. Want a cold one or a room temp one?” 

Spencer curls his lips over his teeth, a small blush creeping up his neck, “cold is fine. Thank you, Andie.” 

“You’re welcome sweet thing.” She digs in her fridge and finds the bottle, handing it to him. “Now, time for a tour.” 

… 

It takes a good few minutes for her to show you both around the house, making sure she explains every single detail even down to the persian rug her current boyfriend bought her when he went to visit his mother. 

Spencer, of course, went on and on about this, that and the third. It was cute. 

But soon you were in Spencer's lap, staying warm by a fire and roasting a marshmallow while Spencer got the chocolate and graham crackers ready. You were two drinks and three shots in, happily buzzed but not even close to drunk. 

“You are so hot when you open chocolate. S’anyone ever told you that?” You say it quietly, not wanting to embarrass him in front of anyone. 

He smirks, using the top graham cracker to slide the toasted marshmallow off of the stick and smoosh it between the other cracker and chocolate. “No one has ever told me that. But there is a first for everything.” 

He takes the first bite before handing you the rest. You pout a little and he laughs. “You ate my smore! Not fair.” 

He kisses you, lips brushing over yours gently, “I will make you another when you finish that one.” “What happened to my shy boy? Getting bossy out here.” You smirk, knowing you’re pushing his buttons.

“I didn’t hear you complaining last night when I fucked you into the mattress.” He says right in your ear, nipping at it slightly. 

You shiver, squirming in his lap. “You-you can’t do this to me. We can’t fuck here.” 

He kisses your temple, “there are four bathrooms here. We totally could. They all lock, I made sure.” 

Andie claps her hands, “ten minutes till midnight!” 

Spencer grips your thigh, “what a way to ring in the new year? Me buried inside you.” 

You cross your legs, trying anything to get some friction. 

“They’ll notice, Spence.” You look around, no one is paying attention to you, most of them sucking face with their dates.

“Oh baby, they won’t notice.” 

Before you know it, your pants and underwear are on the bathroom floor, and Spencer's face buried in your cunt. You bite your fist to quiet the moan. For some reason, it was extremely hot getting eaten out with the possibility of someone hearing you. But that didn’t mean you wanted to get caught. 

“So pretty bunny.” He purrs from below you. He pushes two fingers inside you, easily opening you up. He knows your body better than you do, making mental notes of every little moan, gasp, and sigh that leaves your lips. Because of this it isn’t long before he has you falling over the edge, somehow keeping your moans quiet.

“Time,” He asks as he stands, towering over you.

You check your phone with shaky fingers, “11… 11:50” 

Spencer pulls at his belt with fervor, pushing his pants down till they pool at his ankles. “Gotta keep you quiet for another ten minutes.” 

His lips are on yours, swallowing your moans as he pushes all the way inside you. He doesn’t waste time, his hips snapping against yours. His lips travel from your lips and down your neck, moving your sweatshirt to the side to suck hickies where no one can see them. 

‘Just for me,’ he’d always say. ‘Only for me.’ 

“Spencer, please.” How you manage to whisper it is beyond you. But it doesn’t matter with the way he’s moving. 

“Shh… I’ve got you, bunny.” He snaps his hips faster. 

Your second orgasm comes right at 11:58. And it isn’t long before you can hear your friends counting down. 

Ten.

“Fuck bunny. Feel so good.” 

Nine

“S-spencer…” 

Eight

His hand covers your mouth, muffling your growing moans. 

Seven 

“I know you don’t want to get caught.” 

Six 

“‘Specially not so close to midnight. Right?” 

Five 

You shake your head no. Eyes staying locked with his.

Four

A wicked smirk crosses his lips, his confidence growing. 

Three

“S’what I thought.” 

Two 

His thrust grow more and more sloppy and before long his head falls into your shoulder and his orgasm rips through him, spilling inside you. 

One

His kiss is hard, hands on the sides of your face while he makes out with you, riding out the rest of his orgasm. He’s panting as he pulls back, Spencer's forehead resting on yours. 

“Happy New Years, sweet angel.”

...

I hope you enjoyed! This is my first fic in almost a year. Im nervous to say the least lmao. I love you all ❤️

[apomaro-mellow]

I wanted to write church fucking again but it turned more into church love-making

Steve was long past caring if anyone heard them. The only thing on his mind was taking Eddie deeper and deeper. This place was built with Eddie's money anyway. And it wasn't really a building to practice any religion known to man. As Eddie had put it, the first and only thing being worshipped here was them and their love.

And to Steve there was honestly nothing more sacred.

-------------------

"Do we really need to do the separation thing?", Eddie asked. He didn't whine. He definitely wasn't whining as Steve packed his bag.

"We're only doing like 5 traditional things for our wedding and this is one of them", Steve said, zipping up a duffel bag.

He gave Eddie a kiss on the lips, one that was too short considering he wouldn't even be seeing him for another twenty-four hours, let alone kiss him again. He chased after Steve's lips only to have his beloved pull back.

"You're going to make me late. Robin's already honked once", Steve said.

"Mmm, she can come up and rip you from my arms if she wants you so bad", Eddie said, pulling Steve into his hold and falling back against the bed.

"You know she will. And she'll have the spray bottle and everything", Steve warned, but doing nothing to stop Eddie from groping his behind.

Steve was able to break away before Robin got pushed to that point and leave to stay at her place until the wedding. Eddie let out a sigh that was equal parts dreamy and forlorn. He did his best to keep his mind off of not being around Steve and his friends had the ultimate bachelor party planned. But he couldn't help but think at times how much nicer it would be with his Stevie there.

"Technically we're both bachelors, so we could've had the same party", Eddie reasoned.

The others wouldn't hear it and kept him sufficiently busy until they all passed out around 3 am. At 5 am, Eddie woke up walked over to the church. He took out his key and unlocked the door. Inside was completely empty. But Eddie had saw to the renovations himself to make sure it was up to par.

He sat in the first pew and let out a sigh. In just a few hours, he and Steve would be standing in front of this altar, vowing themselves to each other. Eddie would have done it anywhere, the courthouse, a friend's backyard, their sacred bedroom. But Steve's upbringing wouldn't allow him anything less than a church. Thankfully, Eddie had enough 'fuck-you' money to find an abandoned one and have it built back up just for the two of them. And perhaps any other queer that wanted an unofficial ceremony.

Eddie himself rarely looked to Jesus for answers and was just about to ask what he was even doing here when the doors opened again. And who should walk through it but the answers to any question he ever had.

"Eddie? What are you doing here?"

"Awaiting salvation. And here you are", Eddie smiled. "What are you doing here?"

"Searching for...well, for you, I guess", Steve said as he walked down the aisle and took a seat in the same pew as Eddie. But at a distance for polite friends and not two men who were getting married in a few hours and already knew each others bodies.

"Why are you all the way over there?", Eddie smirked. "You think we need a chaperone or something."

"I came to get a moment of peace and quiet before the storm today is going to be", Steve said. "And you are anything but peaceful and quiet."

"You just said you were searching for me?"

"I meant that sometimes searching for one thing can bring you another." Steve smiled as he shook his head a little, a memory coming back to him. "My mom always said 'when you ask God for patience, he doesn't give you patience. He gives you a situation where you need to be patient'."

"You sure your mom wasn't praying to a genie? Or a monkey's paw?"

"I'm just saying that I came to a church for peace and instead, I see my fiance."

Eddie scooted closer to Steve. "Sounds to me like His Mighty Heavenliness is throwing down a challenge. Can you be quiet around me Steve?"

Steve knew he couldn't. And Eddie knew he couldn't. Nor would his fiance's big ego even allow Steve to even attempt to be quiet. Eddie wouldn't stop until this place was filled with his echoes. But he held steady.

"There's not even a comfortable place to do it", he said.

To which, Eddie jumped up and went over to the altar, normally it would have a cloth draped over it, but when Eddie pressed down, there was a bit of give, like it was cushioned. Steve didn't even have the presence of mind to ask why because Eddie was already palming himself through his pants, beckoning Steve over with a finger.

Let it be known that marriage didn't stop Steve from being a slut. It was just reserved for his groom-to-be.

So he loved on Eddie and let Eddie love on him, in an embrace that felt more rapturous than any praise he'd given in a church. This was what ecstasy was. Steve knew deep in his soul that he was born for this, to share this with Eddie.

Hours later, dressed to the nines and promising themselves to each other in front of an audience, Steve couldn't stop thinking about his body draped over the altar. Eddie had said more than once that he worshipped Steve's body but the same was true for him. When Eddie slipped the ring onto his finger and kissed him, Steve felt like he was being smiled on by Heaven.

A man like this loving and promising eternity, how could be anything less than a blessing?

[cherryblossompink303]

Patience: ~Attack of the Lady Manager!~

➼ pairing: Kyoya Ootori x Reader ➼ summary: A girl weaves her way into the host club looking to steal your life, starting with your job and moving to your fiance ➼ what to expect: "believe it or not I'm not the heartless person you think I am" ➼ warnings: renge? angst ➼ Part Three | Part Five

“Oh, Tamaki, my dearest Tamaki, why are you so beautiful?”

Tamaki smirks softly, “I’m hoping to catch your eye, even for just one second.” Tamaki apprises elegantly.

“And why is your voice so very sweet and mellow?” a different guest, this time.

“To set your nerves at ease, so that my true feelings might reach your heart.” the response is almost immediate, practiced.

“Why are your eyes filled with tears every time you look at me?”

Teary eyed, even now, “Because the sight of your beautiful smile causes the fountain inside me to start overflowing.”

“Oh, Tamaki~!”

You shake your head through a laugh as you watched Tamaki carries out his usual spiel "Do you ever wonder how on earth Tamaki comes up with this stuff?" You think allowed.

Kyoya hums in agreement, not looking up from his notebook. "he always has had a natural affinity for this kind of stuff, although I must admit some particular lines he comes up with I will never understand where he pulls them from"

"Hello Kyoya, I can't get over how great you look in that Kimono" two guests appear next to where the two of you were sat "Are you planning on releasing anymore picture books of the host club?"

"Unfortunately we don't have anything planned at present ladies" The guests move on with a pout "Oh, Kyoya!" You joke, faking to fawn over him, raising your hand to your forehead "If I didn't know better I would think you a guest"

"You wish, I'm afraid you're obligated to give me your time for free" I taunt, returning to going over the clubs events calendar for that month. "What do you think?" handing over the calendar for him to confirm whether or not it's in line with the club's budget.

Kyoya's face lights up at the sight of the calendar, scanning over its contents "This is...really good...you do a much better job than Tamaki at organising this stuff"

"Really?" kyoya seems lost in thought for a moment, smiling a little at the page "Yeah..."

"Looks like the host club has a brand-new guest." the two of you look up to find a girl hiding in the doorway catching the attention of the hosts.

the twins appear suddenly in front of her, Kaoru offering her a rose.

“Come on in, what are you waiting for?”

“Watching from afar is no fun.” Hikaru presents her with another rose.

Where they got the roses? No one could ever tell.

“Please, Miss.” they insist, leaning forward ever so slightly. The girl makes a small sound of surprise.

“Stop that, how many times do I have to tell you to be more courteous to our first-time guests?” Tamaki presents her with yet another identical rose.

“Please, you don’t have to be afraid, my princess.” Tamaki caresses her chin with his finger, she seems afraid despite his affirmations, “I welcome you to the Ouran Host Club.”

The girl’s hand flies across Tamaki’s cheek as she shoves him away, “No! Don’t touch me! You’re phony!” She screams.

The entire host club observes with a collective gasp, wide eyes watching the scene unfold.

Tamaki staggers from the impact and covers his reddening face with his palm, “What do you mean I’m phony?!” He panics, his voice muffled.

“Just what I said! You’re phony! I find it hard to believe that someone like you is the prince character of this host club!”

Tamaki back-peddles from her accusing finger and loud volume with panicked breathing, to which you flinch at gently.

“You shouldn’t go spreading your love around so easily like that, you stupid! You must be a dimwitted narcissist! You’re incompetent! You’re a commoner! You’re disgusting!”

One strike after another to Tamaki’s ego, and he finally keels over.

He’s created a new technique!”

“One man slow-motion!”

You stand over Tamaki, just slightly in front of Kyoya, who seems deep in thought.

“I don’t suppose… you are…?”

Kyoya doesn’t get to finish his thought before the strange girl is gasping with a high pitch, her eyes welling up with tears and her face morphing into amazement.

“It’s you, Kyoya!” She shrieks, shoving you roughly out of her way, to which you grunt as Haruhi catches you by both arms.

“What on earth-?”

The girl forces herself into Kyoya’s arms in a strangling embrace, her face buried into his kimono.

“Oh, how I’ve longed to meet you! My one and only prince charming!” she squeals obnoxiously.

You stood stunned slightly off the side, having no idea what was going on, your breath hitching in your throat as you make eye contact with Kyoya in a mutual glance of helplessness.

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“Your fiancé?" Hikaru questioned

"Kyoya-Senpai?” Kaoru following soon behind.

You sat in the corner of the room watching everything unfold, you did not know what to think. Was there something that you hadn't been told? Did your father break off your engagement? Had Kyoya been arranged to marry another? Surely you wouldn't still be in Japan if that was the case.

You look off to your left as you realise that Tamaki is sulking in a similar fashion to you. "Why is he sulking?" Hikaru questioned

"Because mommy kept a secret from daddy" Kaoru answered teasingly. "Whatever. Why does everyone refer to us like we're husband and wife?" Kyoya asked, gaze slowly being adverted as his attention was slowly being pulled to you, sat at a table in the corner having a cup of coffee by yourself.

"Ours is a story of love at first sight!” Renge announces, fawning over the 'memory' which was when you caught on that something even weirder was happening, Kyoya could have another arranged fiance but if you knew one thing it was that Kyoya was not in love.

“I couldn’t resist the way you were adoring those flowers in the backyard when you thought no one else was looking! And how sweet it was when you reached out to that poor little injured kitten!”

“Are you serious? Could you have the wrong person?” You gesture violently to Kyoya standing adjacent to you, clearly not the man she was describing.

“No way! I could recognize my love anywhere!” Renge near screams in your face. Kyoya staring blankly next to you

“He’s a gentleman who’s kind to everyone but doesn’t ask for anything in return! He likes solitude but, in fact, sometimes he gets lonely!”

"Okay now I know we aren't talking about the same person" You chimed in, not expecting Kyoya to shoot you what may have been the first look of hurt that you had seen off of him.

"He looks like the star of the dating sim Uki-Doki Memorial! You’re my real life Ichijo Miyabi!” Renge finally squeals out, allowing the hosts to realize she was delusional, erasing their confusion.

“Oh, alright. She’s delusional.” Your expression relaxes when you realize that Kyoya isn’t hiding a secret fiancé behind everyone’s back.

“Uki-”

“Doki-”

“OTAKU!” Tamaki screeches in panic.

“OTAKU?!” Hikaru gasps in astonishment.

“I’VE NEVER SEEN ONE!” Kaoru wails.

Kyoya’s now seated on the same sofa, once again, deep in thought.

“I get it now, you’re in love with that character. You’re projecting that love onto me and somehow deluded yourself into thinking that we’re engaged.” Kyoya explains as Renge skips around behind him with obnoxious squealing.

“I assume this Miyabi character probably wears glasses as well.” On cue, Kyoya adjusts his glasses.

“So she… made it up? You’re not really her fiancé, right?” Tamaki holds his breath in hope.

“Well no, I don’t ever remember asking for her hand in marriage.” Kyoya shrugs “Besides, this is the first time I’ve ever met the woman.” Kyoya crosses his arms casually.

You stood with you arms crossed behind the sofa he was sat on "...Not to mention you're already engaged?" you pointed out the obvious.

Renges frolicking came to a grinding halt "Already...engaged?" you did not know whether or not you should shatter this illusion of hers. "Yes! y/n and kyoya-senpai are engaged!" Honey chimed in with no regard for the consequences.

"You!" Renge screamed in your face "What do you know about MY Kyoya? He doesn't deserve you! He's going to marry me!" she rambled at a hundred miles a minute. You exchange a concerned glance with Kyoya.

"Uh...I..." She seemed to quickly forget about you, jumping in front of Kyoya . According to my research, I understand that you’re in charge of managing the club, is that true, Kyoya?”

“That’s right! Kyo-Chan is our director!” Honey confirms.

“You’re the club’s director? That’s perfect! Oh wow, I’ve always wanted to wear a sandwich board to advertise a business!” Renge squeals.

“We… don’t advertise, we’re just a host club.” you point out, becoming increasingly bothered at her presence. Ignoring you, Renge spins with determination, “I’ve made up my mind! From now on, I’m gonna be the manager of this host club!”

You paused, getting increasingly frustrated at her presence, but before you go to tell her that you're already the manager Kyoya grabs your upper arm, leaning in to whisper "The Houshakuji family are incredibly good friends with both of our fathers, we just have to play into this for a while until I can figure something out"

"You're okay with this?" You question, raising an eyebrow "I'd rather not but believe it or not I'm not the heartless person you think I am, I can play it off for a while" You didn't expect Kyoya to throw your words back in your face, leaving you stunned.

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“I thought about it a lot last night, and maybe having another lady manager isn’t such a bad idea.”

“Here we go.” you roll your eyes at Tamaki’s assessment.

“Why do you say that?” The twins urge.

“Well, it’s fairly obvious, isn’t it? Renge just transferred into the same class as Haruhi. So, if Haruhi has a girlfriend around, it could bring out the female within her. Renge’s girlish air of tenderness might be able to stimulate Haruhi’s own sense of femininity!”

"I swear it's like I don't exist sometimes" You mutter looking around to see if anyone else was going to call it out, Haruhi laughs a little "You'd think that given that I need to not let people know I'm a girl he wouldn't want me to gain more femininity."

“Now is our chance to help Haruhi get in touch with her feminine side! This is an important project, men. She doesn’t have any friends in class right now except for these two shady twins. That’s no good for her.” Tamaki urges. “Like you have room to talk.” The twins tilt their heads.

“Hey everyone!” Renge soon enters the room much to your dismay. “You’ll be happy to know that your new manager, Renge, has baked all of you some cookies!”

Tamaki fawns over the act “Isn’t she ladylike? I’m so moved by your generosity!” she swoons.

“I didn’t bake these cookies for you, you phony prince.” she denied him, Tamaki returns to sulking in a corner.

Renge plants herself in front of Kyoya, “I’m sorry I burnt them a little bit. I did the best I could.” she stares up at him with wide heart eyes.

“And I already know what you’re going to say. Oh, you’re always so sweet to me, Kyoya!”

Honey tries a cookie near you, “She wasn’t kidding, these cookies really are burnt.” He grimaces.

Mori appears behind him, “Don’t eat that Mitsukuni, it’s bad for you.” he informs. Renge, enraged, chases them around the room noisily. “She’s scaring me!” Honey cries, carried by Mori as they flee from Renge’s raging rampage.

On the other side of the room the twins sit scheming, Hikaru whispering to Kaoru "Have you noticed that y/n and Kyoya haven't said a word to each other all day?"

Kaoru looks over to the two of you, a noticable distance in between "I can't imagine that she is too happy with Renge coming in and trying to steal her life"Hikaru adds on"And Kyoya seems way too complicit with it all"

As if they shared a mutual light bulb moments the two of them exchange smug smirks as they get an idea "We should push them in the right direction"

Hikaru approaches you to take the cookie that you had just picked up from your hand and puts back into your mouth, lifting your chin with his fingers.

“May I try?” he bites into the cookie while still in your mouth. Your cheeks flush as half the cookie is still perched between your lips, unsure of where this came from.

This managed to grab Kyoya's attention, looking up from his notebook for the first time of the day.

Kaoru slides a hand behind your neck, “Uh oh, y/n, you’ve got crumbs on your face.” His tongue slides out and streaks across your cheek to lick up the crumbs. You whimper and squint your eyes shut at the proximity, hoping that whatever the twins were doing would end soon.

Kyoya’s grip on his pen tightens as Tamaki emerges from his corner in a fury.

“Did you see what they just did?!” Tamaki screaches and points at the twins. “He took a bite of the cookie while it was in her mouth! And then the other one licked her face! What are they doing?! I told you those shady twins can’t be trusted! They’re trying to seduce her!”

You rub your cheek gently “You know you could have just told me and I would’ve wiped it off.” your face contorting in disgust. You look to Hikaru, “And if you wanted to try one, there’s plenty here.” You gesture with the bag of cookies.

Tamaki takes a sharp intake of breath, sounding similar to a snort, grabbing your face urgently, “That’s not the way you’re supposed to react, y/n! You have to stay strong and reject them, then casually brush them to the side! Do you understand?!”

“This is sexual harassment, Tamaki.” You snort, crossing your arms.

“SEXUAL HARASSMENT?! If that counts as sexual harassment then they’re twice as guilty! Someone call the police!”

“Cut it out, Boss, we’re sorry!” The twins plead,the fear of god being sent into them.

Renge watches the scene with a scowl. Honey approaches her cautiously.

“Renge-Chan, Renge-Chan! Want some? It’s milk.” He presents her with a pink cup with a bunny imprinted on the side.

Renge ponders a moment, “Lukewarm…”

“Huh?”

“Every single one of you! Except for Kyoya, all of your characters are lukewarm! Each of you needs to have some sort of dark side, you understand? Girls are vulnerable to handsome young men who are troubled! If you keep carrying on like this, it’s only a matter of time before the girls get tired of you and stop coming altogether! Are you trying to ruin my precious Kyoya’s business?! As your manager, it’s my duty to change your character backgrounds! Let’s start with you!”

"Change their character backgrounds? They're people not video game characters" you spoke up. Renge paused, slowly turning to face you with a look of horror "GET OUT!" she screams.

Your eyes widen, taken aback a little, you go to reply but in doing so you make eye contact with kyoya, silently reminding you of why you can't offend Renge "Fine. I'm just going to go" You can hear Honey calling after you as you leave the host club.

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How you ended up on the movie set you have no idea, the last thing you wanted was to be was around Renge or even Kyoya, but somehow since you are part of the host club officially you have to be on set for insurance reasons.

You ended up standing behind Kyoya as the two of you watch Haruhi play out a scene "You know she won't stop right?" The words come out before you get the chance to stop them. Kyoya hummed in question, turning around to face you. "The longer that you play into this fantasy shes created the more that shes going to believe its real, she wont stop by herself"

Kyoya paused, thinking it over "We've spoken about this, if we offend her-"

"Her taking offence and her father taking offence are two different things, our families are close enough for him to know that you already have an engagement he will understand" you wanted to point out that it was likely her father already knew about her delusions but that was by the by.

Kyoya looked at you pointedly "You really don't like her, do you?" you roll your eyes "I- Not really, but it's beyond that really, i... of course I know that she can't just break the deal between our parents but if that ever happens I have to leave Japan...and I just don't want that to happen"

Kyoya can tell that there is a little more to that story but he figures that it's for another time. The two of you look over as the movie set goes haywire "I know you don't care either way...but I need this deal as much as my father does"

"She doesn't have that much sway" he dismissed, waving you away "You really do not care do you?" the question caught him off guard, his eyes widening in shock before quickly pulling himself together "What do you mean?"

"If Renge carries on as she is, the host club is gonna be torn apart, she's already taken over, I've been pushed out so there's no need for me to be around anymore. Honey's on verge of a breakdown because this new persona she's given goes completely against who he is. i know you only do something if it benefits you but I am asking you just this once to at least pretend like you care"

Kyoya fell silent, looking out at how miserable the club members are , he wants to tell you that he does care, that he doesn't want the club to get torn apart or the engagement to breakdown, but he can't bring himself to.

As an argument breaks out on set Kyoya walks away without another word, grabbing a rock off the ground before smashing the camera lens. "no! what did you do to my camera?"

"What? Is something wrong?" Renge asks innocently.

"I'm terribly sorry but i cannot allow this to go on any longer, this movie paints the host club in a bad light and frankly the position you are trying to take was already filled long ago."

You didn't expect Kyoya to take such a drastic action but it made sense right up till he mentioned you. Why?

"I think you've caused enough trouble around here Renge. Please stop being such a pest"

Renge breaks out into tears "A pest? But you're supposed to pat me on the head and tell me not to worry! You're supposed to be kind and affectionate Kyoya! Why are you acting any differently now! Tell me why!"

"Because that's not the real Kyoya" Tamai chimes in, Renge gasps, breaking down before him. "Does it really matter?" Haruhi asks, appearing in front of her. "Who cares if Kyoya is a little different than you expected him to be. Take a good look at the person inside, and get to know him little by little. It’s a lot more fun that way.”

You lock eyes with Kyoya, realising that why he hadn't noticed how much you cared, you didn't either. Kyoya doesn't show feelings, you know that, but he is kind, just in his own way. If he wasn't he wouldn't have sat with you at the ball, or help you in the clinic, or step in.

Maybe you needed to start following Haruhi's advice.

♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡

Hello, ladies, come on in.” Tamaki encourages from his position with the other hosts on the sofa.

“I bought the video of that film you made!”

“I bought it too!”

“And so did I!”

“Huh?” The host club choruses in confusion as the girls fawn over the professionally produced film.

“That scene in the rain was just phenomenal!”

“I love the lonely prince!”

“And the loving relationship between Hikaru and Kaoru is so sweet!”

“I couldn’t get enough of Haruhi’s poignant expression!”

Tamaki’s hair covers his eyes with a prominent frown. “Kyoya?” He grumbles, not needing to say much more to elicit a response from said host, throwing his head back to where the two of you were sat on opposite ends of a sofa.

“I may have broken the camera’s lens but the footage that we had already shot wasn’t damaged. Naturally, I did cut out that last scene. Sales have been pretty good so far, that Hollywood film crew did a fantastic job. But then I guess, that’s to be expected.”

You laughed under your breath, shaking your head, glad that the host club was back to normal now. "Something amusing?" He asked, looking over to you. "Nothing"

the two of you fell into a comfortable silence before you speak up once more "I should thank you, for shutting down Renge" you eventually concede. "It was no problem, besides, you are a much better manager than she was"

You hummed back, watching Tamaki have another breakdown "I don't know why I thought she could actually replace me, I don't know what you guys would do without me sometimes" he laughed.

"Indeed"

Next time on patience 'The Twins fight!'

Tag list (reply to be added): @skottch @cgmajor @rebirthbunbun

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for exposing my sister-in-law's secret during a fight?

Ok, this one is going to need a bunch of context.

I (29F) started to date my fiance F (31M) when I was 26. While he is the sweetest person ever, his family is a bit difficult and it was hard for me to fit in. They are a very traditional family of Japanese descent, very rich too, and his mother MIL (60sF) had a dream of seeing all of her three sons married to other rich girls of Japanese descent. I am white and from very humble origins, so I was not very well accepted at first. The thing that bothered me the most was the constant comparisons to my brother in law BIL's (34M) wife SIL (33F), who is rich and of Japanese descent. I was deeply in love with F and decided to fight for my place in his family; I started to take Japanese classes and ended up really good at it, and I was also the one who took care of MIL after her appendicitis' surgery. She recognized my hard work and we became closer and closer, at the same time she realized SIL didn't make the same effort for her and the family as I do, and she started to be very vocal about how I was her favorite daughter in law and how SIL should do better and try to be more like me. Suddenly, the tables have turned and SIL was the one being compared to me, no the other way around.

Of course she didn't like that at all and started to antagonize me and criticize every small thing about me. She would complain my dog would bark too much (which she did, but SIL was a little mean about it), and when my dog died, she made a comment about how finally she wouldn't have to hear her barking anymore (that stung a lot since I loved my dog with all my heart and she was like a baby to me), she would also complain about my apartment every time she visited me, saying it was too cheap (as I said, I come from humble origins) and her newest topic of complaining are my earrings: I like to wear cute and funny earrings (only at work and family gatherings, I don't wear them at social events or anything like that) and she always talks about how I'm too old to wear them and how tacky it looks. F and I noticed she's been progressively meaner the closer we get to our wedding (three months from now) and think she's trying to scare me away before I become an official part of the family.

One last piece of context: some months ago, F told me in confidence about how 6 years ago SIL's brother and sister in law died in a car accident and left an orphaned boy of 4 years old. SIL was the little boy's only family, but she refused to take him in saying she already had too much work with her own son (who was also 4 at the time). That didn't go well with the family; MIL and my father in law (who was alive at the time) assured her they would help with the kid and she would have all the support, but she simply didn't want the boy, so he was sent to the system. That was something MIL never forgave her for, since family is everything to her, and it was something only MIL, BIL, SIL, F and his younger brother knew. He told me that in confidence and asked me to not tell anyone. I promised I wouldn't.

Now for the actual situation.

Our last family dinner was one of F's cousins' birthday, so all the extended family was around. No kidding, I think there were around 60 people there or more. SIL, once again, decided to mock me about my earrings (little cherry earrings, very cute) and talked again how I was to old to wear them, how they were kid earrings etc. I've been tolerating her bullshit for so long now and after her comments about my dog's death, I was more sensitive than usual, so I snapped back and said that it's not because she dresses herself like an old lady that I have to do the same. She got angry at that and a proper fight started; we saying worse and worse stuff to each other while everyone stopped to watch. It ended up with her mocking my upbringing and calling me a gold digger, accusing my of only being with F for his money. That really struck a nerve because I heard that before at the beginning of our relationship and it always hurt my feelings, since I genuinely love F. Before I could even think about it, I said: "At least I'm not a heartless bitch like you. How's your nephew doing, by the way? Oh, you have no idea, right? Since you put him in a fucking orphanage!"

She got speechless after that and left the place, went straight to her car with BIL and went home. I didn't hear from her or him since them. F is furious with me since he told me that in confidence and now all the extended family knows SIL's secret. MIL doesn't care at all; she never got over what SIL did to that little boy and it's been a while since SIL isn't in her best graces.

Now that I'm calmer I feel a little guilty for exposing SIL like that, but she was always so awful to me that I can't really feel that bad. Mostly, I feel bad for BIL, with who I always had a good relationship and even defended me back in the day when the family didn't accept me very well. Now he's not talking to me either and, as far as I know, he's also not talking to F.

So, AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[happeehippie]

instagram j.b.

summary: follow joe and his fiance evie as they go through his football career.

*face claim is Yasmin Quintana*

series masterlist.

breezyevie

liked by joeyb_9, millyg, bengals, and 367,972 others

breezyevie: pics i sent my mom this week

view all 9,736 comments…

user: im sorry what did we do to deserve this?

> breezyevie: i want to post more life stuff!

eviesmomma: i love you two!

> breezyevie: we love you mama!

user: not the love note 😢

> breezyevie: jb is the best.

user: someone needs to take away your ig. i’m sick of seeing ur bf.

> breezyevie: fiancé

joeyb_9: you look pretty everyday.. fyi.

> breezyevie: you are the loml.

user: my dream

millyg: you make me sick.

> breezyevie: envy is a disease. 🤪

user: i’m blocking you.

breezyevie

liked by millyg, joeyb_9, eviesmomma, and 736,820 others

breezyevie: GameDey! me and mills are ready for the divisional round

view all 10,837 comments…

user: i’ll be there tailgating atleast

user: seriously how much orange do you own

> breezyevie: i don’t think i can answer.

user: let’s get it! WHO DEY

joeyb_9: make sure you bring your helmet.

> breezyevie: i’ll be ready to save the day if needed.

user: yaaaaasss my fav!

millyg: i just want to make it clear that i am an eagles/chargers fan and i don’t own cincy merch.

> breezyevie: i tried to get her to wear some of mine. she says she’s no bandwagon.

joeyb_9

liked by breezyevie, lahjay10_, joemainmixon, and 492,936 others

joeyb_9: King in the North

view all 50,736 comments…

user: i know a gangster when i see one

user: you’re a pos.

bengals: 👑

user: the hardest post of all time

breezyevie: king of my heart. 💗

> user: the tswift reference 😭

> user: i knew i could count my queen to be a swiftie

> breezyevie: all of the best people are.. except joe. 🫠

user: joe is so fine tbh

user: joe cool.

lahjay10_: my boy 💪🏽💪🏽

breezyevie

liked by bengals, joeyb_9, millyb, and 927,062 others

breezyevie: there is nothing i love more than watching my joey do the damn thing. #whodey

view all 6,397 comments…

user: i love him

> breezyevie: he’s just the best

user: him not posting pics of you is a red flag

> breezyevie: i’m not sure why this bothers y’all so much.

millyg: i’m obsessed with you

> breezyevie: nooo. i love you.

user: queen of the afc

> breezyevie: stop it right now!

user: be honest did you pick joes game day fit?

> breezyevie: 👀

user: how does it feel to be dating the best qb in the history of the nfl?

> breezyevie: my joey. 🧡

joeyb_9: always supporting me 🤍

user: you’re like obsessed with him.

> breezyevie: i am.

joeyb_9

liked by bengals, lahjay10_, and 1,639,388 others

joeyb_9: “Cartier glasses I won’t even peek at you”

view all 27,672 comments…

bengals: Icon

user: if you’re ever feeling down with ur busted gf let me know

> millyg: let’s respect my girl. they’ve been together for almost six years, he don’t care about you.

> user: they are engaged now, get a life.

user: jacket goes HARD

lahjay10_: you bad ass!

user: work it joe

breezyevie: best dressed qb in the league?

> joeyb_9: with a little help. 👀

user: this guy has no clue 🤣

user: i was unaware of the swag

millyg: drip

breezyevies ig stories

[jwirecs]

RECOMMENDED BTS FICS OF SEPTEMBER 2023💖

hello, hello! here are my bts recs of september! hopefully these beautiful stories get more recognition as well as the writers 💝

** anything in parentheses and bolded are my thoughts that can be disregarded if needed **

🔞smut || 💔angst || 💕fluff || ✅completed || 🔄ongoing || 💯favorite

Head Over Skates || @mercurygguk🔞💔🔄

↳ in which jeon jungkook is the captain of the hockey team and one of the biggest fuckboys on campus. you hate his guts and he knows it – that's why he's more than determined to make the most of three weeks of project work. you're convinced it's going to be the end of you.

My Heart Did || @aseaofyoongi🔞💔✅

↳ as soon as senior years comes to an end a lot of teens shed who we were and strive to be flourish into a more polished version of themselves. although, broken hearts aren’t so quick to heal what happens when thoughts reveal all we need to know?

Bad Idea || @back2bluesidex🔞💕✅

↳ Accepting Jungkook's invitation to watch him train topless was such a bad idea.

Don't Tell Me That... You Forgot || @sweetiestokkie💕✅

↳ (short summary that i have come up with since there wasnt one, but oc plans a secret birthday for jk. so we have a lil ol angy jjk.)

Just The Tip? || @joon4eva🔞💕✅

↳ you and namjoon are left alone together for a little too long. or: in your childhood home, you learn just how much is really "just the tip" with namjoon.

My Flower || @i-am-baechu💕✅💯

↳ Men don’t get enough flowers. That’s why whenever it’s Namjoon’s birthday, Y/N always sends flowers (someone please get me a boo so that i can give them flowers.)

Socks || @hisunshiine💕✅

↳ (theres no summary but if we talking about socks, his god dam toe socks lives in my mind rent free and i need it to start paying rent.)

Take Care Of You || @kookslastbutton🔞💕💔✅💯💯

↳ To keep your fiance from burning out you suggest a weekend getaway to Gapyeong, a charming town about an hour outside Seoul. You've specifically asked him to leave his work equipment at home but like a deep rooted habit, he still brings it with him. You're left with no choice but to find a way to get his attention back.

When I Say Forever || @kookslastbutton🔞💕✅💯

↳ Today’s your wedding day and the slightly shy yet handsome, doe-eyed stranger who chased after you when you dropped your wallet on the street three years ago just happens to be the man standing before you today.

7 Hybrids Moved In With Me || @lillsisamarshmallow💕💔🔄

↳ When the dog hybrid who visits her bakery starts taking extra food Y/N follows it through the alleys to find out why, but what happens when she stumbles upon an empty alley only to find 6 more hybrids and some very familiar pastries?

Entangled || @caelesjjk🔞✅💯

↳ Jeon Jungkook is Spider-Man.

Hold Me Together || @casuallyimagining💕🔄💯

↳ a collection of drabbles and headcanons featuring seokjin, yoongi, and namjoon and their significant others.... all of whom have chronic illnesses. each piece can be read on its own or as part of a series.

Leaked || @btsficsandsuch💕💔✅

↳ Req by OP's Followers: Hi ,I love your writing so much . Can I request a ot7 × platonic fem reader where they became friends accidentally and she is also their fan but something happens like a misunderstanding of sorts and she is blamed or something then when the truth comes out they ask for her forgiveness but don't make her forgive them easily also include an accident in between story if you can. Sorry if it's too confusing .have a good day

Stars Around My Scars || @vanteggukie💕💔🔄

↳ people are not always what they seem. you learned that the hard way, when you caught your boyfriend cheating, the night that was supposed to be one of the best ones you ever experienced. but on the same night you also learned that in everything bad, there’s always a little bit of good.

Rainy Days || @rklve🔞💕💔✅💯💯

↳ your life choices left not only yours, but jungkook's heart broken in peaces. now you're back in town, and just like pluto, even if it's cold and dark, he tends to orbit around his sun forever.

Taste Of His Own Medicine || @btsficsandsuch💔✅💯

↳ You suddenly have to leave to go back to your home country for a few months. Yoongi decides to ignore you so you decide to show him how it feels when he realizes you’re gone.

The Back Up Plan || @btsgotjams27💕✅💯

↳ one drunken night leads to an agreement that if you and jungkook are still single by 30, you'd marry each other. the only thing is jungkook has been doing everything he can to keep you single.

Aphrodite In War || @jungblue🔞💕💔🔄

↳ Everyone knew about the war that had been brewing on the edge of campus for the past two years. Sorority versus Fraternity; a showdown for the ages. However, when the escalating antics between them yields the consequence of possible suspensions for both chapters, the presidents of each house must come together to try and figure out how to end this battle… Which is kind of hard, considering they were the ones responsible for it in the first place.

Basic Needs || @gggukniverse🔞✅💯

↳ missing sex while being stuck in your apartment with your two roommates during quarantine is being the worst nightmare you could've imagined. fortunately, you're not the only one who's touch starved.

Safety Net || @pradaksj🔞💕💔✅

↳ on new year’s eve, you and jungkook reflect on each other’s entire year together. 

Heart-On || @junghelioseok🔞✅💯💯

↳ your one-night stand definitely isn’t relationship material, but maybe—just maybe—your manager’s son is. (this is part of their serendipity series, make note that its not connected. do check out their jjk fic thats part of this series!!)

Territorial || @bonny-kookoo🔞💕🔄

↳ Who would've known that the big bad wolf isn't actually all that bad?

Do check out all of the other BTS Fics that i have reblogged as well!!

** if there is any fics that you guys would like to recommend, please do! i am slowly running out of fics to read **

[madhatterbri]

Weary Alliance | K.M.

Summary: Kol isn't a fan of Y/N going on a mission with the werewolves, so he agrees to go.

Y/N sat in the bayou on a long next to her ex-fiance, Kurt. The tension in the air was thick. He asked her a question that she knew her current boyfriend, Kol, would shoot down immediately. Kurt wanted her to accompany him on a mission against some witches. Apparently, they were causing grief to his pack.

"I don't know if that is a good idea," Y/N tried to laugh. She placed a hand on Kurt's shoulder. The look on his face made her realize how serious the situation was. He needed her now more than ever.

"They are killing my pack, Y/N. One by one, they go missing, and we find their bodies a week later. Please," he begged, and she dropped her head. She bit her bottom lip. Kol wasn't going to like this one bit.

The drive to the Mikaelson compound was tense. Neither of the former lovers talked to the other. The silence was deafening. She pulled into the compound.

"Here we go," she chuckled nervously and turned off the car.

They walked into the compound. The air was thick as the brothers stopped what they were planning to watch them. Kurt stood behind her.

"It seems that Y/N allowed another stray into the home. Get rid of it," Klaus sighed and waved his hand. Kurt balled up his fist, yet didn't say anything. He needed Y/N's help, and if she could convince them to help, it would be a bonus.

"He needs my help, Kol, and I am going with him," she informed her boyfriend. The three brothers looked at each other before looking at Kurt. Y/N turned to look at her friend. "You should probably wait in the car,"

Kol followed after Y/N when she went to their room. Based on his heavy breathing and stomping of his feet, he was pissed. The two men never got along.

"Are you insane? This is the same man that left you to die on one of his last missions," Kol reminded her.

"Kol, they are killing off his pack. I have to help when I can," she answered, ignoring his brief trip down memory lane. He stood still and stared at her.

"A rather very touching story, darling. One, I'm sure he made up to win you back. I'm not allowing you to go with him, not without me," he informed her. Y/N looked at him in shock. "And I'm sure Elijah and Klaus will love to bring down the witches once and for all,"

"Maybe we can all be friends," Y/N offered. Kol shot her a glare.

"Not bloody likely,"

[gffa]

I'm still making my way through the weewoo show (stopping occasionally to watch the newest episodes) and I have realized that I think I'm the most emotionally invested in the Bobby/Athena ship, sorry but no one else on that show can compete with Angela Bassett for my love. That it's Mr. Casey Sports Night she married only makes it better. Though, Chimney/Maddie are a reasonably close second, oh my god, they're so cute. I'm not really sure where I land re: Buck's love life, I'm kind of just going where the show takes me. Like, sometimes the show was incredibly blatant about feeling like they were setting the stage, you have someone commenting that Buck's ready to move on to something more grown up in his life, something more real, something meaningful, then immediately cut to him waiting outside Eddie and Christopher's house??? Like, what??? But then I watch the newest episodes and oh Buck and Tommy really do have fun chemistry, that kiss drunk look on Buck's face after their first kiss was so good, they're funny together, I'm enjoying it?? And I'm enjoying Eddie being one hell of a hot mess, like I've always liked him, but I have never liked him more than when he went out on a date with his dead ex-wife's doppleganger, which is going to throw a massive grenade into his current relationship, which is already weird because he found out she used to be a nun and it's bringing up all this weirdness that was probably already there and just looking for an excuse, never mind what it's going to do to his kid if he ever meets his dead mom's doppleganger, like this is a mess and I am living for it. But more than that, I'm here for Athena, because I also love that she can be such a hot mess at times, that someone kills her fiance and she spends 20 years or whatever looking for him, finds him, and has him arrested despite that he's spent that entire time in service to others because he felt guilty, but doesn't even REGISTER that she is married to a man she loves who killed a lot of people's spouses/fiances, got away with it, and felt so guilty that he spent all that time in service to others as a way to make amends. And none of this even seems to be deliberate! It's GREAT, because it makes her such a hypocrite in a lot of ways, but so thoroughly relatable because it is so very easy to forgive the ones you love and not forgive the ones who wronged you, even if they're largely the same. Anyway, I love this ridiculous show, I'm going to be sad when I have no more to catch up on. I like The Weewoo Show: Yeehaw! Version, but it doesn't scratch quite the same itch since I spoiled myself about where the Owen/Gwyn storyline is going.

[rogueddie]

Sanctuary Prompt for strangerthings-a-side's aromantic visibility week, day 2: Library AU

Sat in Max's hospital room, listening to Lucas reading books aloud for her, felt like the only place that Erica could find any safety in the aftermath of Vecnas victory.

Even when Max woke, blind and confused, Lucas kept reading to her. The stories offered an escape, and Lucas' voice helped keep her grounded. Helped her keep positive.

Lucas is ok, and that was the thing Erica cared about most in those moments.

It wasn't until the next year that they would finally defeat Vecna, until they finally started the slow and arduous task of rebuilding Hawkins from the ground up.

Almost everything had been destroyed in the fighting.

Including the library.

Thinking of those days in the hospital, in those quiet moments when she was finally able to find peace through Lucas and his books...

She insisted on doing anything and everything she could to help rebuild the library. She was volunteering as soon as it opened.

The head librarian often joked about how she was going to take his job one day.

She didn't think he was serious. But, as soon as she turned twenty, he sat her down in his office and explained how the transfer will work.

"I'm old," he told her. "I've done all I can for this place. I can't think of anyone better for the job."

Erica thrived as the head librarian. Having the authority to finally make changes that she's been thinking about feels more like relief than a pressuring position.

None of the issues she assumes to occur ever come around either.

"You're such a pretty young woman," one of the women she works with comments, patting her arm. "Are you ever going to find yourself a man?"

"No," Erica says. She barely looks away from the bookshelf she's organising. "All I need are my books. No man will ever make me this happy."

"Good for you," the woman chuckles. "Never disappointed, huh?"

"I guess," Erica shrugs. "I just don't want that type of love."

"That type?"

"Yeah. I love my family, especially my brother. His fiance always comes over with him too and she's actually cool. I got friends. Tina. I can't imagine needing anyone else."

The woman hums, going quiet for a moment, considering.

Erica almost forgets about her and the conversation for the rest of the day, continuing on with her daily routine.

It's not until the end of the day, as they're preparing to close the library, that she comes up again.

"Sorry if this is crossing a line," the woman starts, before gently putting a little book on the desk. "But you fought hard to get this book in here..."

"I'm not gay."

"Oh. You're not?"

"No. I don't like either."

She frowns, looking down at the book. "Is that something in here?"

"Maybe. I don't know, and I don't care."

"Of course not," the woman huffs, smiling. "Well, as long as you're happy."

"Yes... yes, I really am."

[teddypickerry]

𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇-𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐒.

pairings! nikki sixx x fem reader

word count! 2.4k

summary! in which the brutal ending of y/n & tommy’s relationship leaves an opening for nikki

a/n! i’m not in love w this BUTTT it’ll do the job. also guys??? i’ve read like every fucking nikki thing on this app pls help. need more!!!! but yeah idk this kinda sucks.

"how long after a breakup can you ask someone out?" was the words that made mick mars' typical poker face turn into something quite different. considering the man speaking them, nikki goddamn sixx, the king of sleaze, was questioning this. there was doubt in the guitarist's mind who nikki had in mind while thinking out loud. y/n y/l/n. otherwise known as, y/n, tommy lee's girlfriend.

the two sat around in mars' dressing room for their vegas show. which so luckily happened to be y/n's current residence. mick balanced his guitar on his lap and a bottle of something that was definitely not water against his leg. he preferred his alone time before the havoc of the shows. so when his bassist interrupted this sacred hour, he was incredibly dissatisfied. nikki dragged himself in the room as if he was in pain. there was a million thoughts behind his green eyes and a bottle of jack daniels in his right hand.

"bassist, just go fuck his girlfriend already." mick spoke out of pure annoyance to hint, with pure hope, that sixx would get the hell out of his dressing room. but of course, nikki lacked this cue and continued his pacing antics. "okay they broke up they're not even together, man. and," he stopped and pointed his free hand at mick who gave up on the silence and leaned back into the couch. "you, don't know shit. i could be talking about anyone."

"okay so tommy cheating on y/n and her finding out exactly six hours ago has nothing to do with this?" mick stated rather he questioned as nikki booped his head before taking a long swig of the whiskey. as if it serviced as his oxygen in that moment. "but on another note i mean i fucked his ex girlfriend-"

"fiance," mick corrected from the couch making nikki dramatically groan before continuing on with his story. "-i fucked my best friend's fiancé okay? and i tried to fuck his mom, right? and he didn't give two shits did he?"

"well he never found out about the whole cheating on him with you thing but-" mick added along making nikki's green eyes shift towards him with utter annoyance. "what i'm trying to say here is," his voice deepened and increased its volume. "this is nowhere near as bad as that, right? i mean asking his ex-girlfriend out on a real date. it's not like i'm trying to bone her. i mean i am, but not right away."

"well of course because you're a gentleman." mick humored with his own playful smile approaching his lips. nikki couldn't help but keep his eyes on the wiseman as he brought the bottle to his lips again. he could feel the lightness of the bottle as he brought it back down. he was gonna be plastered before he could even leave this dressing room.

mick mars wasn't one to typically give a shit about nikki's love life i mean, he liked KISS. but, mick did like y/n. he thought tommy was a fucking dumbass for cheating on her with a bunch of groupies. and he had watched nikki slowly begin to catch feelings for her. he beat the shit out of tommy anytime he did y/n wrong, and he actually found himself having talks with her whenever she joined them on the road or in the studio. mick could even catch the weird looks nikki would give tommy anytime he'd blow her a kiss or talk about fucking her. it may have been a fucked up version of love, but it was nikki's.

"look," mick started as he sat the bottle on the coffee table and looked at the young bassist. "i know you like her, you'd be a dumbass not to. you like her more than tommy ever could fucking dream of. so just fucking go for it. she might not be ready to date another dumbass right away but then you wait for her. because y/n, man, she's worth it. but i mean until she'd be ready just be there for her. she's upset, her boyfriend cheated on her with a bunch of hot chicks. go talk to her and make sure she's okay."

a smile suddenly appeared on nikki's face as he got lost in the vision of the woman. it was like he'd completely left the room in that moment and entered y/n's enticing daydream. it wasn't long before he made the actual journey to her hotel room, running out of the dressing room making mick scowl. "sixx! i didn't mean right now, we have a show- oh, forget it." he finished with a grumble as he brought his liquor to his lips and downed it. before exiting the room too and preparing for the show.

it wasn't hard to find the hotel considering it was just down from the venue. the same hotel the band was staying in, just a few floors to separate them. it wasn't shocking that y/n was in the same hotel considering she only ended things with the drummer six hours earlier. getting her own room almost immediately after. nikki still hadn't seen the girl since the brutal ending to the relationship between his two friends. she had locked herself away in her hotel room and he had been stuck in with tommy's dumbass all day in rehearsals.

y/n's room number was a haze in the bassist's memory. partly due to the intoxication of his mind and partly because he had already forgotten what the bellhop told him just moments ago. when he lied and said he was mr. y/l/n and had forgotten his room number. he had to bring out his theatrics when the young bellhop told him he couldn't simply give out a resident's room number. nikki pulled the "i'm pretty sure my wife is sucking some other guys dick in there right now, so can you just please tell me my goddamn room number so i can serve that cheating bastard!"

the long haired rocker found himself at his wife and his shared room. he knocked with his fist as the other awkwardly stood by his side. he'd no idea what he was going to say to her or do with her. i mean, he had a good idea of what he wanted to do but he obviously wouldn't be executing that on her... not at this moment at least.

the opening of the door made his breath nearly hitch. the girl stood there wrapped in the hotel branded robe with dampened hair. her face was tinted red and puffy as if she'd been crying all afternoon. it was fair considering the afternoon that she did have. but it still made nikki want to rip the door off it's hinges.

"sixx," she called out softly as she presented him a slight smile as if it was the best she had. he mirrored her expression, a sad smile taking over his face at the sight of the defeated girl. the drummer and y/n had only dated a few months at this point, but they'd been more serious than nikki'd ever seen tommy. tommy's a hopeless romantic with a fucked up view of it. but he's still a romantic guy, he's a guy who loves. and y/n was easy to love.

the fame and fortune finally got to tommy and he did what he did best — he fucked every moving thing in his sight. he was full of guilt, not that that helped in the slightest. and after a month of cheating on the girl with several packs of groupies he finally came clean. expressing that he wanted to stop and be with her and her only. y/n however didn't see eye to eye here... and screamed the living shit out of tommy. rightfully so.

"what are you doing here...?" she asked with furrowed eyebrows as nikki shrugged and glanced around her hotel room. noticing the television humming in the background, an episode of fantasy island playing. her hotel room lacked the size that his did but the view was insane. "wanted to see how you're doing. can i come in?"

she nodded and stepped out of the way so nikki could enter the room. shutting the door behind him the bassist made his way towards the bed. he was in his concert getup, the ripped mötley tank top that showed off his severe amount of tattoos and tan that could go on for days. vegas was a heat festival and it was a causality to wear his classic leather pants. "sorry, 'm not thinking straight." y/n muttered as she followed him into the room and crossed her arms. he turned towards her as she stopped in her tracks. the two nearly slamming into one another.

"it's fine, you know. just... fuck tommy, man." nikki shrugged out as y/n let out a chuckle. her first genuine smile of the day. nikki couldn't help but smile at the sound that rolled off her tongue. the girl bit her lip before sitting down at the end of her bed. the bassist leaned against the dresser his arms crossing in the process. nikki seemed to tower over the sat girl in this moment. something he noticed almost immediately. "you're something else, sixx."

"no, i mean it. what he did- jesus," he sighed at the girl as her smile faltered. "just fuck him. he finally got something good and he let that go. that's on him. he's a dumbass."

"yeah, yeah he is." y/n mumbled as she leaned back onto her elbows, her robe riding up ever so slightly. nikki couldn't help but look at the exposed skin — immediately regretting it once he remembered it was his friend's ex-girlfriend. an awesome girl who was upset and lonely. typically he'd take this as a chance to do her but this was different. this is the girl he's known for a few months now. the girl who he saw on a daily basis, who understood his jokes, who genuinely cared if he drank too much, who wouldn't shame him for his actions — rather express concern. she gave a shit about him and looked good doing it.

"i don't know how he just expected me to get over it like that." she muttered out as she fell on her back and her hands covered her eyes. nikki stood for a moment before taking a seat beside her, leaning down towards her. y/n removed her hands from her eyes as the two were warningly close. "everyone told me to not get involved with a rockstar. all my friends told me it was a bad idea, tommy has a reputation. i always told them they were mad and i believed it too. i fooled myself even. i just..." she trailed off as she turned to face the boy even more. "i can't believe he would do this."

"maybe you just got involved with the wrong rockstar," nikki mumbled quietly. so quiet y/n could hardly pick up but she in fact did. words that stuck in her mind as her eyes got lost in his. she'd never seen nikki tense up so quickly, like he just said something he shouldn't have. nikki wasn't one to say something and feel bad about it, or take it back. he was a man of his word and he meant every single one.

"look i don't want to rush you into anything, i know you're upset right now. i know my timing is off but god, since i met you i haven't been able to stop thinking about you. i can't stop thinking about how if i would have seen you first at that party instead of tommy. i just..." his voice trailed off as he let out a dry chuckle. "i don't know what i'm doing right now. i know this is a fucked up thing to do to tommy but quite frankly i don't fucking care. because you're the girl of my dreams and as fucking annoying as that phrase is- i mean it. i've never felt something so rock 'n' roll for someone, man."

the silence was inevitable for a moment as y/n's face became unreadable. nikki pressured his own smile to break it, "you don't have to say anything or whatever. i mean you probably don't even give two shits about me-"

sixx was shut up by the feeling of her lips pressed to his. a feeling he'd thought off far too many times but never quite yet experienced it. all his daydreams couldn't even amount to the warmth and harmony between the two pairs of lips. he'd kissed women before, obviously, but never with such love behind it.

y/n's hand came up behind his neck as she pulled him down onto her, him obliging perfectly. his legs came other side of her own as he could feel the thin fabric of the robe below him. one hand held her face while the other wrapped the two together. their lips moved in perfect harmony until they finally pulled apart for a breath of oxygen. but y/n tasted much better to nikki.

"i like you, nikki. i like you a lot. i like just about everything about you... but you're right, i'm not ready for anything serious yet." y/n told him as he nodded and offered her an understanding smile. "when i am-"

"-i'll be right here." nikki finished off her sentence as she shined a bright smile at the bassist who was practically straddling her. "until then, friends?"

"who share spit?" nikki questioned softly as he lips pressed to her jawline and lowered to her neck. the young woman couldn't help but giggle at the sensation and the feeling of the man. "mhm," she mumbled into his hair. "what are we gonna tell tommy?"

"i really don't give a shit about him right now and neither should you. but... i guess we'll cross that bridge when we, how the fuck does that go? i don't know but i guess we'll just avoid him at the show tonight." he shrugged to the woman before a thought crossed her mind. "wait... nikki. the show-"

"fuck!" he practically screamed before hopping off the bed and onto the floor where he nearly fell. "i gotta be on stage in like ten minutes and fuck, i'm gonna have to run." he grumbled for a moment before turning towards y/n. "after party. come. please, i want you there."

"you got it, friend. now run, forrest, run!"

[bullet-clubs-bitch]

If It's wrong I don't wanna be right

Cash Wheeler X Fem reader

Summary: What happens when the bucks younger sister finally caves and gets with one of her brothers biggest rivals. 

Prompt  60 “Please? I’ll be good I promise!”

Warnings: SMUT, use of smoking, alcohol, swearing

Word count:  2218

Main Masterlist Cash Wheeler Masterlist

Cash’s POV

I knew this was wrong but I didn’t care. I had waited years for this moment, no way I was going to let it slip between my fingers. This little obsession started four years ago. I met Y/n at a wrestling event and instantly fell in love. She was the most gorgeous person I had ever seen. Dax and I were thinking of signing with AEW when I met Y/n. She introduced herself and told us all about what AEW had to offer us. I was instantly sold, I knew I needed to get to know her, spend all of my time with her. I would have asked her out right then and there but the ring on her finger told me otherwise.  

Even though she was taken I figured a little crush wouldn't hurt anyone. As I got to know her I learnt that she was engaged and I was shocked to find out that she was the younger sister of Matt and Nick Jackson. Y/n was the polar opposite of her brothers, they were straight edge, she was a party girl. The bucks were good christian boys but Y/n haven't been to church in years. The more I learnt about her the deeper I fell in love. I picked up on her habits and the two of us would often share drinks after shows. 

Then one day everything changed when the rivalry between FTR and The Young Bucks became real. I was quite angry when the bucks beat us for our tag titles but was even more angry when Y/n and I stopped hanging out. My anger continued to grow over the years. In a way I was praying for the downfall of her fiance. I wasn’t stupid I knew she was only with the older man for the money he had to offer. Y/n didn’t wrestle anymore and served as trainer backstage and writer for the show. I knew the job paid well but not good enough for a Birkin bag. 

It made me sick everytime I saw them together. I could love her better than he could. Heck I knew she didn't really love him either. Dax informed me that this crush had turned into an obsession and he was right. Yet, I kept my feelings a secret for three years, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. 

*****

All Out London

I felt like I had been tossing and turning for hours. I couldn't seem to fall asleep. The nerves of the big show kept me awake. I looked at the clock and it read 4:23 AM, too early to start the day but I couldn't stare at the ceiling in my hotel room any longer. I threw on a sweater and headed down to the lobby, hoping the fresh air would help in any form. Just like I suspected the lobby was empty, the drunks had cleared and the morning birds were yet to arrive. I stepped outside to the large balcony on the main floor and was shocked to find Y/n. 

“Can’t sleep?” I asked as I approached her. 

“Nope, you?” She responded

“Nah. I didn’t know you smoked?” I asked Y/n as I watched her place the half gone cigarette between her lips, breathing out the smoke into the gloomy darkness. 

“If my brothers ask, I stopped smoking 10 years ago. It helps me sleep” She said before bringing the cigarette back up to her lips. 

“I think it’s so funny how different you are compared to your brothers” I told Y/n fascinated 

“We are polar opposites. They haven’t had a drink in their lives while I have been drinking since I was 15. Not to mention you know about my little smoking secret.” 

I said nothing, wanting her to continue. “I started smoking when I was 16, I was the trouble maker obviously. I got away with it too and actually technically did quit when I was 20. I only smoke sometimes now. Mostly when I am stressed or I can't sleep”

 “Well, your secret is safe with me.” I told her honestly. In a weird twisted way I was more attracted to her now than before. She stood in front of me with baggy sweatpants and a hoodie that was two sizes too big. She wore no makeup, hair in a messy bun with glasses I have only seen her wear a few times before. She smelt like vanilla and tobacco, her green eyes stared back at me, a mix of exhaustion and desire. 

“If you weren't a sworn enemy of my brothers I would probably have you in my hotel room right now” I choked at the words that left her lips. I could feel my cheeks heat up and get a bit hard with her words. I knew that Y/n was now single but as the time passed the FTR and Bucks rivalry became so intense that it would never work between us. It would be like getting with the enemy. 

I didn’t even know what to say. Y/n left me speechless. I watched as she put out her cigarette and took a step towards me. We were chest to chest, I could smell the smoke on her breath. She didn’t even say anything, she just gave me a look that told me all I needed to know. She wanted me and I wanted her back, I had for years. 

“We really shouldn't be doing this Y/n” The words fell out in a whisper. I was internally punching myself at my choice of words. I knew it was wrong but I needed this.  

“I know baby” Y/n said as she cupped my face and whispered in my ear. “But as you can tell I don’t like following the rules. This is wrong but, don’t they say two wrongs make a right? Me and you can make that right.” I could feel myself getting harder as she continued to speak. “I know you want me, I’ve always known Cash. I’m not stupid. I can feel how bad you want me too” Y/n said in a seductive tone as she palmed my clothed erection. 

I knew this was going to be the only chance I would get so I jumped on it and without hesitation accepted the invite to Y/n’s hotel room. 

****

Everything happened so fast, one second we were in the elevator, the next we were ripping each other's clothes off. Y/n left a trail of kisses from my lips to my navel. Kneeling before me like she was about to say a prayer. I could have came right then and there, but I needed to be inside her. I watched as she placed delicate kisses from the tip of my dick all the way to the base before taking me whole in her mouth in one shot. I let out a loud moan at the feeling. After a moment she started to bob her head around my cock. I was lost in pleasure, I could feel precum starting to spill and my orgasm soon approaching. 

It took all of my strength to get her to stop, she almost looked offended. But I knew I needed to cum inside her. I pushed Y/n on the bed and got on top of her. Spreading her legs ever so gently I pushed into her slowly, wanting to savor the moment. As soon as I was balls deep I took no time and started ramming into her as fast as I could. I took one of her breasts in my mouth, sucking the flesh before switching to the other. 

Y/N’s POV

There was something about this that felt so surreal. Never in a million years would I have thought that I would have Cash Wheeler in my hotel room, not to mention the fact that in a few hours he would be going to war with my brothers. None of that mattered though, I was focused on chasing this high. 

Cash was bigger than I expected, he fit me perfectly, stretching me out beautifully, making me feel things I haven’t felt in a long time. I could feel he was close, so close. It didn’t matter how hard he tried to hold it, I was determined to make him cum first. I managed to pull him off of me, saying nothing as I looked into his eyes and saw something I never thought I would see, fear. 

Cash’s POV

When Y/n pulled me off of her that was when the reality set in. “Did I hurt you?” I asked, as my eyes scanned over her body, looking for non existent injuries. No response, “Did I do something wrong?” I asked again as I leaned down, placing a delicate kiss on her collarbone. Still nothing. 

She then placed her hands on my chest, drawing shapes on my skin before she pushed me on the bed so she was on top of me. Just before as I was about to speak she cut me off “Shhhh, relax darling you didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who invited you into my home so I’m in charge” she said as she placed her hands gently on my still hard cock, giving it a rather hard squeeze, before placing kisses once again on my shaft. She then sunk down on me, slowly, it was torturous. Once she bottomed out she stopped for a moment before she started to bounce slowly on my cock. My hands found her hips as I guided her down on me, it took me everything in me not to trust up into her, she must have read my mind as she said “Don’t even think about it” 

She then began to pick up her pace, slamming down on me as hard as she could, our mixed moans sounded like music to my ears. “I can feel your close” Y/n said as she continued to fuck herself on me “Not yet” I told her, still wanting to make her cum first. Just then she stopped completely. “Fuck” I called out, “Please” I begged her. She just gave me a look “Please? I’ll be good I promise!” I cried out, not even recognizing my own voice, that was filled with desperation. “You know what on second thought maybe you’re right. I’m changing my mind, I can have some fun with this, you don’t cum until I say you can, do you understand?” “Yes ma'am” I replied 

Y/n remained still, rubbing her clit as she began to chase her own orgasm, I could feel her squeezing me as she continued to rub violent circles on the swollen bud. Everything was getting too much, I felt like I would die if I didn’t cum right there in then. My hands gripped the sheets, head thrown back into the pillows as she began to slowly bounce on my cock once more. I could feel her get closer and closer as she increased her speed, her hands on my chest as she rode me beautifully. She grabbed one of my hands, placing it on her clit, indicating me to grant her that extra sensation needed for her release. “You’re doing so good baby, almost there” 

She said praising me, I could feel her pussy start to spasm around my cock and I knew I couldn't hold off any longer. “Cum, inside me” that was all I needed to hear as I let go, my orgasm washing over me. Y/n came right after, fucking us both through our hard orgasms. 

It didn’t take long before she collapsed on my chest, the two of us trying to catch our breath, coming down from our hard orgasms. I don’t ever think I had cum so hard in my life. 

We stayed like that for a while, laying in a comfortable silence. I was first to break the silence “What the fuck was that” I said, laughing a bit. “I don’t fucking know” she responded slowley getting off of me, as I noticed the mess we made. “I don’t think you understand how much I needed that” Y/n said, burying her face into a pillow. 

“Not as much as I did” I responded, before I got up to grab a towel to clean us both up.

I knelt carefully between her legs as I cleaned the mixture of our juices. “You know, If I wasn’t so sensitive and exhausted I would have asked you to eat me out right now” She said, looking at me between her thighs. I could feel myself blush at the comment. 

I looked at the clock and it read 5:30 am. Without even thinking about it I went to grab my clothing that was thrown in different parts of the room. “Don’t tell me you're leaving already Cash” Y/n called out in a sad tone. “We don’t need to be at the arena until noon, stay, get some rest, you have a big match coming up and plus you look like shit” she said jokingly “Have you looked at yourself?” I looked like a hot mess. 

I decided to join Y/n in bed, for the few hrs of sleep, that would end up being the best sleep of my life. 

I didn't know what would happen after today but I knew something. No matter what would happen in a few hours I would fight. I would fight for us. Nothing would ever be the same after what happened, in good ways and bad but I knew this would be something worth fighting for.

[peachdues]

Hi Peach!

the latest episode of KNY and your recent posts have just made me go and reread TGW - don’t ask me how many times I’ve read it now cause I lost count 🤷🏼‍♀️

I love your take on my emo King so much. Giyuu is quite a deadpan character but you are able to write him having silly/funny moments so well. They don’t feel forced at all. Adding comedy to the endless of list of your amazing writing skills 🩵

And I’m so looking forward to the part II Tanjiro visit scene (poor poor boy) and the Miko chastising Giyuu for having an empty house (she will be chewing him out I can’t wait)

I went back and reread the first TGW teaser you ever posted and I hope you don’t mind me asking but was reader always going to be a Shrine Maiden or did that idea come later as the fic came together?

Now I need to be so honest with you - Peach ‘IT TAKES TWO’ killed me in the best horny way possible, I am quite partial to a wee bit of SaneGiyu so seeing them in a threesome fic the scream I scrumpt 😭 mean corruption kink Giyuu forever

I hope you’re getting lots of smooches and fresh air

much love

-🫧🫧

(PS no stop no don't write for Shinjiro, he’s totally not everyone’s anime dad crush at all 😉😚)

BESTIE BUBBLEEEEEEEEEE!!

So tickled that you reread TGW again. Honestly, I’ve fallen right back into the brain rot it, and spent a good portion of today writing for it 😭 seeing Giyuu smile in last night’s episode made me MELT.

and ALSMSKAKOAKS as always your compliments reduce me to an absolute puddle and I will never be solid again.

I’ll answer your asks about TGW below!

I won’t give away Reader’s backstory quite yet (that comes in Part 3!) but I will say — she was raised in a shrine and doesn’t have a lot of personal items either. She’s actually so overwhelmed by the fact she finally has a home — something that she can call hers, that she almost cries 😭 but you’ll see Giyuu feel sort of insecure about it for the first time (he just wants to impress his girl lmao).

As for your question about when I decided to make Reader a shrine maiden in TGW..

TGW came about because of the “I’m not your enemy” scene that was teased in the OG teaser — hence, why it was the first look. The entirety of TGW bloomed around this one mental image I had of Giyuu strangling his lover. I decided pretty quickly it would be his BOJ.

I knew she was going to be a civilian when I published the OG teaser, but I hadn’t settled on anything more concrete than that. HOWEVER, the second scene I wrote was the first time scene that ends Part I — I wrote that entire thing in like an hour while procrastinating. I first teased the virginity loss scene like, maybe two days after the OG teaser? So in the span of those two days I decided she would be a Shrine Maiden. It was a pretty easy decision — I needed her to have some flexibility RE her background but also give her a stable place Giyuu could come back to and see her. So that’s how I decided! But to answer your question, she was pretty much a Miko from the start, minus like two days lmao.

As for the Tanjiro scene — honestly, I’m enjoying the thought of it sm. Especially because he, like everyone else left alive after Muzan, had NO IDEA Reader even existed.

Giyuu actually takes off from the Butterfly Mansion to get her as soon as he regains consciousness and doesn’t tell anyone where he’s going — so when they show up concerned to his estate, you can imagine how SHOOK they are to se that not only is there a woman there (the implication of what they did the previous night being very clear lmao), but also that she’s introduced as his fiance. Like, “here she is, this is mine. I love her.”

I’m so glad you loved It Takes Two 🫡🫡 I am happy to provide spit roasting always!!

Sending you much love!! Please stop encouraging me to write Shinjuro I have too much to do!! I’ve already started HELP

[restlesschilled]

TMagP 013

Note: As Always, I am a backer so this was written 23 April, 2024 and scheduled to be posted on 25 April, 2024

oh god its another episodes written by Alex

awww thanks odin <3

Im dreading this

PRE STATEMENT/ CASE

OHHH DATE TIME

THE FLIRTING

This is so cute but i cant trust it because alex wrote it

"that you dont know how cute you are" adshfjagdhflakshdf

WERE STARTING WITH THE BIG STUFF

"hi im from an alternate universe"

CELIA IS A MOM

JACK IS HER BABY

"i had a while few years when I first moved here"

IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO CELIA OR JACK I WILL RIOT

HOW DARE

SHES A SINGLE MOM

"that depends on your baggage. DISH"

"they were the first ones that didnt want me" oooooooo\

Alice's Parents are dead good to know

"most pathetic vague post shes ever scene"

"more wine" "please"

LENA OFFICE

GWEN MY POOR BABY

"is it my fault?"

MY POOR PRECIOUS GIRL

"were managing the bad guys" FUCK

CASE

this hold music is a BOP

i had to stop and have my friend explain public school in England to me because that is not the same thing as American public schools

oh lovely a "fiance guy"

a hedge fund guy what i mean is a hedge fund guy

Why in gods name, would you use experimental setting on a hedge fund/ investing app… when you have no idea what it does and it has a shit tone of disclaimers??? i get being desperate but that's just stupid

also the irony of this guy saying hes a good person when hes betting on people failing with hedge funds

do people even steal phones anymore?

i feel like they are not worth all that much and just have to many ways to tack them for it to be worth anything unless you are targeting someone specifically

yeah i figured they might have targeted him

im pretty sure this would qualify as inside trading somehow

betting against your own company and than tanking the company is very illegal

pretty sure betting you'll have a shit time and then making sure you have a shit time would be the same thing

basically this man is committing insurance fraud... but through a hedge fund

it just occurred to me hes calling from the hospital that's what the beeping is

also vertigo mentioned

he was attack by computer bugs lol

shitty "finance guy" gets whats coming to him asmr

post statement

okay i know sam probably mean "be professional" like stop with the flirting

BUT WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT I SOUND LIKE YALL HAVE BEEN HOOKING UP AFTER WORK SOMETIMES.

HAVE YALL BEEN HOOKING UP?

this is how i choose to interpret this this is my new head canon( it was already kinda my head canon)

But if you ever ask me to be professional again, I'm going to have to take a shit on your desk." ALICE

"you signed the official secrets act in your onboarding. And I know all your school friends say treason's 'bussin'' and 'fire', but it won't look good on your CV." i love her so much

"its fine when I say it"

this episode really said fuck capitalism didn't it

also do week need to talk about the fact that celia's son is named Jack Ripley like jack the ripper

WAIT A SECOND JACK IS A NICKNAME FOR JOHN/JON

DID SHE NAME HER SON AFTER JON?

[sometimes-i-write-4-you]

Heartless - a criminal minds episode\\part 2

part 1, part 3, masterlist

- english is not my first language please exuse any spelling or grammer mistakes.

- this case is made up

- it happens around the.. 6th season, i think? so the team is Hotch, dave, Morgan, Prentiss, JJ and reid

- it will end up being Reidxreader kinda, tho my main focous is to create a plot line for an episode with a (y\n) charecter.

- lmk what you think - i try to make the charectes as in charecter i can :)

As per Hotches orders, once they've landed Reid and dave went to the MEs office, to take a look at the bodies. (y\n), prentiss and JJ joined Hotch and Morgan at the local police station, tho when they arrived the 5 of them split up - Hotch and morgan setteled in the station and talked to the chief officer, while the rest started interviewing the ex-soon-to-be-wives. … "Mr. Clark, hello, i am SSA prentiss" Emily says, shaking his hand as she sat down. He is wearing his work uniforms - a polo shirt with the symbol of the garage he workes for and a pair of dirty jeans with stains that are probably impossible to remove.

"i am so sorry for your loss, i can't even imagine what you are going through. The guy who was sitting across from her nodded, "thank you" he smiles weakly, clearly forcing himself to keep a more profational deminor, thoe he wasn't sure why, "and please, call me Daniel. mr. Clark is my dad". Prentiss smiles at him, trying to be comforting. "well, Daniel, i have a few questions for you, this might be… not so easy to hear, so take a moment, if you feel like you need it" Emily says, taking a breath herself.

This guy was already heartbroken over his murderd fiance, and now she's about to ask him if there is any chance he was being cheathed on. What an awful way to learn your partner may have been unfaithful. "go on, i am ready for whatever it is. i just want to know who did this to my… to the love of my life" Daniel says, and so Emily asks the question she has to. "Daniel, were there ever any suspitions your fiance was cheating on you?"

… "Mrs. garisson, hey" JJ smiles at the poor woman sitting on the padded chair, eyes red and hair in a messy bun. She is wearing a nice enough dress, clearly attempting to look okay. Layla wipes away the tears streaming down her face. "Hey" she says in a weak voice. "my name is Jennifer Jeroue, i am here with the FBI, we came to investigate what happend to James". "Thank you" Layla says, "i- i heard there were others. Other ones who lost.. lost their Fiance, others that…" she tries to finish the senence but failes. Her cries are painful for JJ to hear.

"Jennifer… why him? of all the people…" Layle askes, "he is such a great guy, everyone…" she stops, realising she is talking in present, "liked him. He was always so kind, and nice…" she continues to talk, tripping on her words. JJ lookes at her, wondering how would she be able to break her heart all over again. "uhm, Layla, i have to ask you this question - don't take this in the wrong way, please, we are just trying to make sure we are covering all our bases…" JJ starts, tho finishing the sentence is proving itself to be harder than she thought it will be, "has anyone ever suspected that james was't loyal?"

…

"you must be with the FBI" Winnoa says, reaching her hand out for (y\n) to shake. She is wearing a simple yet complamating button up shirt coverd in stripes that matched the ones on her pants. (y\n) cleares their throat and shake the hand that was offered to them, "yes, hello, i am agent (y\l\n), but you can call me (y\n)". "Thank you for coming" Winnona says, "this… this is awful. I don't think something like that has ever happened in our town. "well, this is part of the reason we are here, to help the local police deal with these horrible crimes" (y\n) says, sitting down. "is there anyway i can help? i was already questioned by the officers here, but maybe you can see something they couldn't see in my answears" The woman says, despreat to be of help.

"Winnona, i am very sorry for what i am about to ask…" they start, but they find it hard to figure out a way to finish the sentence. "whatever it is, please" the woman across from them is begging, and so (y\n) clears their throat to ask, tho they end up bearly forming the sentence. "is there any chance… do you think that maybe.. well, Winnona, i am so very sorry - have you ever suspected Sean was being unfaithful?"

…

"Well, no, never. Fiona was a kind soul, she could bearly hurt a fly. i highly doubt she would ever do such thing" Daniel says, "Why would you even feel the need to ask me this question?" his tone was laced with anger, but rightfully so. Prentiss expected that reaction. "well, just making sure we are looking at all possible leads" She says, "Can you think of someone that may have suspected that Fiona wasn't a great match for you? anyone ever objected to your engagment?" she asks this, aware of the facy Daniel is getting more and more upset as more words leave her mouth.

…

"i really don't think so" Layla says, her tone calm but her eyes full of pain. "as i said, he is- was, a lovely man, we loved each other, we were soulmates" her voice breaks as the word 'soulmates' leaves her mouth, and the tears fill her eyes once again. JJ smiled at her a sad smile, "Well. is there any chance there was someone who didn't agree with you on that?" JJ askes. Layla's cries grow stronger, and JJ's need to comfort her wins her need to be profitional. she gets up to rest her hand on Layla's shoulder. The woman leans into JJ, crying, and JJ's heart breaks.

…

"i never suspected such thing" Winnona says, "but, uh, my friend did. he was staying long hours in the office, and my friend who works at a similar posetion claimed she was never asked to stay so long at the office, not at that rate at least. I asked him about that, and he said that her boss is probably just less harsh than his is, and that he only has eyes for me, and that will never change. than he got on one knee and asked if i'll allow him to spend the rest of my life with him. i belived him, and said yes. my friend wasn't very happy about that, but she ended up being supportive. she wanted me to be happy".

"okay, thank you" (y\n) says, sad smile on their face, unsure if this possible lead is a good thing or no. "agent, do you think he was cheating? was my friend right? is that what got him killed?" Winnona askes, but sadly (y\n) dosen't have an answer, so they just say "we'll let you know if we find something".

…

"Garcia is calling" Morgan calls out and Hotch, Prentiss, JJ and (y\n) follow him into the office the BAU took over for their time here. "hey there choclate thounder" Garcia's voice says from the other side of the line. "Baby girl, you are on speaker. Hotch, Prentiss, JJ and (y\l\n) are here with me. did you find any connection between the couples?" Derek says. "hey there you beautiful agents" Garcia said, "i called to let you know there is no overlap in the victimis wedding planning - they looked at different venues, checked out different caterings… even the photographeres they reached out to were different… but i mean, that has to be it, right? i mean, i looked at their socials - they all have privet accounts so i highly doubt that's how the unsub found out about the engagment" Garcia says.

"well, we suspect the unsub could be hunting cheaters, so try to find any hint of cheating in the victims life" (y\n) says. "look at their emails, try to find their profiles on, ugh, dating websites…" JJ says. "Winnona said her fiance worked late but a friend says there is no way he needed to work that many hours" (y\n) adds. "okay, i will get back to you with all the answears, no stone will be ledt unturned. Baby girl out" the beeping of the call being hung up came soon after Garcia's last words.

…

"well, all three bodies had their hearts missing - that you already know, but it seems the cause of death was strangulation, but not manual. I think its some fabric, since they all had fibers under their nails as if they were trying to rip it off them" the ME, dr. Roland, says what she gathered so far. "the mark on the guys is about 3.25 inches, which is the typical width of a tie" Reid says, and Dave looks at him, catching up to Reids idea. "he could be strangeling them with a tie, symbolising the tie they could have been wearing on their wedding day" Dave says, and the ME sqints. "The woman… her mark is… texured, in lack of a different word - could be a vail or a garter" she says, "she also seems to have been dead for at least some of the time he strangeled her". "So he was angrier with her, she was closer to his ideal victim, meaning he was probably hurt by a woman and that's what triggered him to start killing" Dave says.

"dr. Roland, by your judgment, would it take any sergical skills to cut the hearts out the way the unsub did?" Reid asks. "well, the first heart had some cuts on it, meaning the unsub probably cut it while trying to cut it out. the cuts are… well, sonky, so i doubt they were done with actual medical eqipment, it looks like the work of a good quality meat knife. the cuts pn the hearts get fewer and fewer with the other hearts, so i belive he learns from his mistakes" She says. "well, thanks doctor, you helped us a lot" Dave smiles at her, and she blushes.

…

By the time Spencer and Dave made it to the police station, the team was all set up at the office they were assigned. the crime board done, orginised by dates and couples, as well as the note "cheaters?" under the line of photos of the victims. they walk into the room, and Prentiss welcomes them in. "Reid, (y\n), you are on the geographical profile" Hotch says, "prentiss, you and morgan will go interview the first wedding venue, Rossie, you will go with JJ to the second one and i'll go with the chief officer to check out the third one" He orders, "sdresses are waiting at your phones". everyone splits up. "well, the first body was found over here" Dr. Reid starts, grabbing the pen from the desk. well, not exactly the desk, as (y\n) was holding it. "hey!" They called out, But mr. pretty boy didn't mind much.

He marks the spot, "second one here…" he mumbles. (y\n) grabs the pen from him, "and the third one here" They say as they circle the spot. Spencer lets out a half-laught, and if it wasn't for the fact he was slightly rude to them a second ago, (y\n) would have thought it was cute. well, they did, actually. "the victims live here, here, and here" (y\n) mumbles, pointing at the town's map with the pen, but not marking anything. "the victims were'nt taken from their homes tho, so that won't help finding the hunting zone" Spencer sighs, "we should look at where the victims were last seen".

"well, that would be… sean at his job, he should be taking route 45 to get home" (y\n) says, reading from the file as spencer marks it with a different pen. "Fiona was at a lunch with a friend according to Daniel, and her phone pinged at a coffee place around… here" They say, pointing at the map to let spencer know where to leave a green circle. "and James's last text was pinged about 10 minitues from the gym he frequented, right about… here" spencer said. "these are all over the town, and not that close to the dump sites, so the unsub must be mobile. in order to move the bodies he will need a big veichal" (y\n) says, furring their eyebrows at the map.

"what about the wedding venues? they could also be the place the unsub chooses his victims" Spencer says. "we just talked to Garcia, and she said-" (y\n) tries to catch up Reid on the phone call he missed, but right on que there is another incoming call from Penelope Garcia herself. "hey there, Garcia, it's (y'n) and i here" Spencer says. "oh, if it's not my favorite wonder boy and wonder mind" Garcia says. (y\n) was also a genious of sort, but they didn't think they quite compared to Reid, tho with the iq of 130 they were the closest on the team. "Garcia, do you have any updates about the wedding plans or the cheting?" (y\n) asks, and spencer shoots them a slightly confused look, as he didn't get the chance to catch up on the team's idea for a lead.

"well, you know how at first i didn't find a connection between the wedding venues? i looked deeper, so deep i got to the very core, and you know what's in the core? Lave. major, hot lava" Garcia says, "it looks like all of the wedding venues are owned by the same major, greedy company. It's called Marry-go-round, and they own most of the wedding venues in the area. each one is designd to appeal to a different audience - they have gothic ones, hystorical ones, botnical ones… they share employees, meaning one guy might be working at more than one venue…" Garcia says, "and before you ask me to, i am already running searches to see who worked at all 3 the day those couples went".

"you are so great, Garcia, i don't know where we'd be without you" (y\n) says, smiling at the phone. "well, the answear is way behind. goodby lovies, sent the rest of the team my love and warm hugs, i will let you guys know once i have answears regarding to the victims… side-quests" Garcia says, ending the call with a smooch sound of a kiss.

…

Prentiss and Morgan walk into the "garden of eden" venue, that was the one James and Layla looket at. "hello" a woman in a bright red suit welcomed them. "my name is Diane" she said, reaching out her hand to shake the one of the pair infront of her, "it is lovely to have such a beautiful couple here, we actually never had such wedding here, so that would be great to have you two as the first one. "you mean… mixed couples?" Morgan asked, confusion in his voice and slight annoyence. "well-" Diane tries to save herself, but the sentence doesn't get the chance to be fully formed.

"mam, we are not here to plan a wedding, we are here to ask about a couple who did" Prentiss cuts her off, showing her the FBI tag. "well, that's unfortunate. I am sorry, but what does that couple has to do with my wedding venue?" Diane asks. "well, they looked at this… lovely venue, and now one of them is dead and the other one got her beloved boyfriend's heart in the mail" Derek says, sparing no details from the woman who already wasn't on his good side. "well, that's unfortunate, but i still don't see what that has to do with us" Diane stands her ground.

"have you seen anyone suspicius around? someone who looked at couples, trying to study them?" Prentiss asks. "do you think this murderer found them here? well that is impossible, only couples and employees are allowed on the premiss" Diane says. "do you ever have more than one couple looking around? this guy could come here with his own fiance" Derek says, the last part of the sentence directed more to his fellow agent than to the wedding venue annoying manager. "no, and i belive this is where we end this conversation. i have a tour here from an actual couple, so, bye-bye" Diane says, walking around the agents to welcome the couple that just walked in. "hello, my name is Diane, it is lovely to have such a beautiful couple here…"

the agents exchange looks and leave the venue, tho they don't think they are done there just yet.

…

"well, the venue we checked was orginised, they had a security detail at the entrence, even after seeing our badge we were'nt let inside, the manager came out to talk to us" JJ said. "he was a lovely man, once he talked to us for a bit he gave us a tour - i noticed they were fixing a broken part of the fence, but he said that it's usually hidden with flowers, so no one knows of it. he said he'd give us the records of the couples who came there the same day as Daniel and Fiona, meaning we may be able to identify his next victim" Dave said, waving the files in his hand.

"the venue we checked said they have double bookings, sometimes more than one couple is there. sometimes only one half of a couple arrives. we should check and see - mayby there is a couple, or someone who claims to be engaged who was in all three venues the same day as the victims, he could be angry with his fiance, unable to process that, and so he kill people who remind him of her in someway" Hotch says.

"and what about you?" Hotches eyes traveled to the two defided faces of his two agents who just walked in. "well, the manager was a bitch" Prentiss sighed, "she bearly answered our questions, and her whole deminor was just… off" Derek agreed with her. Reid and (y\n) come inside the room, holding 6 cups of coffee in between them both. "oh, you are my savior" Prentiss says as she grabs the coffee (y\n) handed to her.

after the coffee ceremony is done, the wonder due explains their findings regarding the hunting zone and the comfort zone, as well as catching their teamates up to speed regarding the connection between the venues.

just as they finished, the actual savior of the team called. "hello my darlings, it is i, Penelope Garcia, coming to you with a very, very sad news flash. i found some proof of unfaithfulness from all of our victims. It appears Sean was spending way too much time in his office, off the clock. He's work sheet says he finished work by 5pm, but his phone pings at home around 9pm, and before that it pings at many different sketchy motels. not once, not twice, but on a weekly basis. James was also being a bad, very bad boy - his pictures are on many different dating websites, and you may think 'well, it could be someone who is using his photos' but no, the some of the photoes on there are very nasty and very not on any of his socials" Garcias word flow stops as she takes a breath to continue.

"And Fiona… well, she was a little tricky, but i found these very much not PG emails between her and a bad.boy.rm@gmail.com, she used her work email, which is very icky of her, but it sure did keep it a secret". "Garcia, how hard would it be for someone to find out about the cheatings?" Prentiss askes. "well, it took me about two hours, so i belive that someone with the avarage hacking skill could get this information in about three days" Garcia says, slight cockiness in her voice. "well, babygirl, this is very helpful information" Derek says, smiling at the phone, "thank you". "can't wait for my reward" Garcia says, and the call is finished.

"It's likely our unsub was cheated on by a woman, since it looked like he overkilled the female victim, and it is possible they were engaged when he found out, that's why he attacks couples who are planning a wedding. He feels the need to punish cheaters" Reid says, looking at his team. "well, that has to narrow down the unsub pool" Dave says. "well, about 12% of married women admit that they have cheated on their spouse, and 20% of engagments end up being broken off, and 50% of those are due to financial stress. This town has roughly 7,639 people-" Spencer starts calculating, trying to figure out exactly how big is the suspect pool. "Kid, please. let's just have Garcia look it up" Dave cuts him off. "it's about 20 potentiol unsubs" Spencer mumbled under his breath, but his teamates don't react. "maybe his mom or dad were also cheaters, that could be the stressor and his partner doing the same thing to him would make one hell of a trigger" Prentiss says.

"well, i think it's time for the profile" Hotch says.

…

JJ, Hotch, Morgan and Prentiss are standing infront of the cameras. "we belive this unsub is a white male in his 20s, he recently expirienced a heartbreak over a cheating partner, possibly a fiance" Hotch says. "He has a high level technical knowlage, as it appears he took a deep dive into the victims life, finding out intimate details about their sex lives" JJ says, trying to not say the straight up truth of the cheatings he uncovered. "tho he has no prior medical skills, he appears to be learning how to perform his ritual with more accuracy" Prentiss says, "therefor we belive he is smart and possibly works at something that requires a similar set of skills as a surgen". "this unsub is sending the victims fiances the hearts he carved out, which shows signs of pshcopathic tendecies. this guy is probably cold, manipulative, and yet has a charm to him not many people see through" Dave continues. "we belive he may have had a parent who cheated on their spouse, making the cheating he expirienced triggering" JJ says. "if you know anyone who can fit this description, we encourege you to talk to us" Hotch says, and the cameras cut.

…

"Garcia and i just talked, she says there is one employee who was in all wedding venues the same day as our victims, but she dosen't fit the profile. happily married, 2 kids, grew up in a loving family" Derek says as he joins his team in the office, highlighting the word "she". "well, maybe the unsub wasn't on the clock, they could have some employees that get paid under the table" Prentiss says. "we profiled the unsub to be white, so it is less likely he is not listed" Reid says. "well, i guess we can't be sure, since he crosses race lines. the main reason we think he's white is because this town has so few pocs, and most of them arent able to afford the type pf education this unsub has" (y\n) says, spinning her chair as she thinks. A knock on the door makes the team look over. "they just found another body" officer Williams says. "let's go" JJ says, following the officer and the rest of the team follows her.

[happeehippie]

instagram j.b

summary: follow along with joe and his fiance evie as they go through his football career.

*face claim is Yasmin Quintana*

series masterlist

evie

liked by bengals, millyg, joeyb_9, and 679,735 others

evie: and so it all begins again.. first GAME DEY of year 3. let’s go jb. 🧡🤍

view all 16,279 comments

user: i love your boyfriend.. im sorry.

> evie: what’s not to love?

user: i am green with envy

joeyb_9: i lack the vocabulary to describe you..

> evie: i freaking love you joey.

user: here we go again, get ready for ev’s feed to be football for the next 6 months 🙄

> user: i don’t know how people are still annoyed by this just unfollow

user: i personally love football season with ev

joeyb_9

liked by bengals, evie, and 952,920 others

joeyb_9: Party in the end zone

view all 4,839 comments…

user: MARRY ME

bengals: 🕺🕺🕺

user: attaboy joey!

user: bad mf bro

evie: okay, hear me out.. let’s work on spinning the ball before you do it again yeah?

> user: 🤣🤣🤣

> user: that’s okay! we still love you joey.

> user: HAHAHA you tell him

> joeyb_9: it’s all in the flick of the wrist baby! i’ll get em next time.

> user: 😭😭😭 A for effort lol

evie

liked by bengals, joeyb_9, and 38,829 others

evie: screaming. crying. and obsessing over this shirt. Happy GAME DEY my little bengies!

view all 7,388 comments…

user: I loved your post about leading with love! we are so lucky to have you as our AFC QUEEN!

> evie: sending you my love sweet girl, thank you so much.

user: watch out for all those girls after your man or you won’t need that shirt anymore

user: big fan of this

joeyb_9: if you wanted an autographed tee you could’ve just asked

> evie: i’m literally just a girl

user: the first lady of cincinnati

> evie: i think it should be you. 🤪

millyg: it should be illegal to look this good at a sporting event.

> evie: spoiler.. it is. 🤪

joeyb_9

liked by bengals, lahjay10_, and 627,937 others

joeyb_9: heating up

view all 2,785 comments…

evie: this looks exactly like a dream i had the other day

> joeyb_9: can you tell me how it ended? 😉

> user: NOT JOE GETTING SPICY IN THE COMMENTS

> user: who allowed him to use the wink emoji

> user: i’ll never recover from this

user: so overrated

user: that’s literally my boyfriend

> evie: are we sharing?

user: badass

user: JOKE

evie

liked by joeyb_9, millyg, and 984,001 others

evie: todays fit check is courtesy of @lahjay10_ for giving me the most wicked game day kicks ever! hbd to me. 🤪

view all 6,839 comments…

bengals: Happy Birthday Mrs. B!

> evie: yall tryna start trouble! 🤣

user: happy birthday ev! queen in the north!

lahjay10_: hbd ev, you ain’t no regular pigeon!

> evie: thanks jay! you ain’t no regular cat!

> user: i live for the uno x ev interactions

user: Happy Birthdey!

user: @joeyb_9 better get that dub for your birthday

> evie: i’m counting on it!

millyg: happy birthday sister! i love you more than life.

> evie: ugh, ilysm!

user: bday fit goes hard

joeyb_9: happy birthday to the best thing that happened to me. you’re older, wiser, and hot as ever!

> evie: i want to celebrate by drowning in cake and pasta.

joeyb_9

liked by millyg, bengals, and 859,512 others

joeyb_9: winning=happy

view all 2,041 comments…

user: the smile 😍😍

user: are you real?

user: no post for evies birthday?

> user: he doesn’t usually post her, it’s no big deal

> user: no one made posts for her birthday! there was a game!

> user: she also doesn’t post him on her feed for his bday

bengals: Yes it does Joey

user: DM me joe

evie: ugh!!! that smile makes me wanna die!

> joeyb_9: me and you=forever

> evie: that’s the plan big guy 🤍

user: my boy

evie

liked by joeyb_9, millyg, and 653,827 others

evie: and that’s MY MAN!!! JB

view all 8,628 comments…

user: the most beautiful

user: SHEEEEESH 🥵

user: so iconic

joeyb_9: my favorite part of every game is knowing you’re out there cheering for me.

> evie: i’ll spend the rest of my life cheering for you joey.

user: joe fuckin burrow is the 🐐

user: are we all just forgetting that we don’t like her?

> user: not everyone doesn’t like her, and if you don’t then unfollow her. easy.

user: oh to be evie..

millyg: mrs. joe fuckin burrow

> evie: coming soon..

> user: QUIT! WHEN?

> user: are we getting an off season wedding?

joeyb_9

liked by bengals, evie, and 963,739 others

joeyb_9: 🥶🥶

view all 15,738 comments…

user: i like what you do

user: you didn’t even give ev a birthday shoutout

> user: you obviously didn’t see her stories from that day, he doesn’t have to post her to celebrate

> user: i adore how she calls him “my joey” like yes queen! he is YOURS!

> user: he’s not an object

user: marry me

user: i’m rooting for you!

evie: it’s just too easy baby..

> joeyb_9: 🥱 light work

user: joe brrrrrr

user: he’s cooooold

evies instagram stories