#that i need to make the most out of everything? but at least i'm taking more care of myself now. i'm glad.
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Enchanted
Male reader x Loossemble's Gowon (playing Ashley).
tags: harvard student gowon, public sex, bathroom sex, blowjob, facial, pussy eating.
word count: 8.2k
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Settling in a new state was a pain, especially if you were a college student who had just entered Harvard, no less. But that bar on the outskirts of campus had become your little refuge every weekend after doing your homework.
Not knowing anyone and not having any friends yet had led you to inevitably look for some entertainment on your own. That's how you found that gem: a wide three-story building—one of them underground—made of red brick and adorned with narrow colonial-style windows with pale wooden frames.
From the first moment you walked in there you were enthralled by the faint aroma of old wood and the freshly made coffee. There were spaces for all kinds of activities, mainly bars of course. But there were also tables to eat at, pool tables, dart boards, and even reading spaces with bookshelves where students like you could go to simply relax while doing their stuff.
Despite all these mini-ecosystems designed so that everyone could choose their preferred environment, all the activity was concentrated in the main bar on the second floor, where you spent most of your time and where you were at that very moment, on a cold Saturday at 8 pm.
The night was particularly quiet, lacking the usual crowds that there were at that time. It was probably due to the weather; you understood that many preferred to be in their rooms, warm under their blankets and enjoying their free time in a calm way. But you weren't doing too bad there, sitting on one of the stools in front of the semi-circular bar while drinking a beer and watching a Celtics game, well wrapped up in your windbreaker and winter hat.
There were few people around you, some watching the game as well and others just chatting among themselves at tables in the corners. The floor below, however, was and sounded busier since a birthday was being celebrated, and the drinks were slowly making the chatter blossom. You wouldn't have liked to be there at that moment; mass social events made you anxious, even more so when you had no one to talk to.
In any case, both places were better than being out there in the snow. Your gaze occasionally strayed to the window to look at it. The flakes floated slowly in the air, falling unhurriedly on the roofs and branches of the trees. It was late November, and the snowfall had only just begun, so there was still a while until Massachusetts looked like the North Pole itself. For now, however, it was nice.
But it wasn't all Christmas fantasy and candy and happiness. Unfortunately, final exam season was approaching since the end of the semester was in mid-December, and that meant doubling the effort and stress in equal measure. You were taking it easy, since you had practically every subject under control except for Molecular Genetics, but of course you wouldn't get too confident. In fact, you were enjoying that moment of relaxation since you would have to spend the whole next day studying without a break.
You had to admit that everything would have been easier if you belonged to one of the common study groups that were formed for these situations, but being a new student, you sadly had to settle for what little you had. That is, yourself. At least for now. Because you wished with all your heart that the situation would change soon.
Who was going to say that it would. Maybe not in the way you expected.
"Nah but I swear to god bruh, JT is kinda dumb sometimes," said the bartender, Jordan, while cleaning a glass. He was one of the ones watching the game with you.
"I mean, at least he tries," you said. "But in this game he needs to stop taking the shots."
"Oh god bro, they put me in the game and I'm making more threes than him."
While you, Jordan and two other guys were commenting on the game, another person sat down in the empty chair to your right. You didn't pay attention, as just like you, the person also started watching the game until the end of that quarter.
"Damn sorry Ash, I didn't see you, hi," Jordan said to the person who had sat next to you. "What are you doing here today?"
You turned to see this Ash person, not knowing that you were going to be completely dazzled by what your eyes were going to see. She was an Asian girl, with beautiful dark brown hair, pretty full cheeks and small bright eyes. You searched through your memories to see if you had seen her before, but it was unlikely that you had seen a girl that pretty and not remember her face. But she was really fucking adorable, wearing a blue jacket that looked like it was going to eat her up because of how petite she was.
"Hi Jordan," the girl replied, her lips slightly curved into a smile. "I was at the birthday party down there but well, I got overstimulated and my social battery got drained."
You didn't want to seem like a weirdo, so before she noticed, you looked away from her and acted nonchalant as you watched the commercials.
"Oh I can understand why," Jordan said, leaning his fists on the bar. "Those motherfuckers are loud as fuck. Same as always?"
"Nah, pour me something mild this time, I have to study tomorrow and I don't want a headache," Ash replied.
Jordan let out a laugh and stepped away from the bar.
"Him too," he pointed his index finger at you before turning his back to you. "And he's on his fourth beer."
You were flabbergasted. He definitely hadn't done that shit. You were forced to look at the girl and him with an embarrassed chuckle, shrugging.
“Oh, you’re a Harvard student too?” Ash asked, turning to look at you. “I’ve never seen you before.”
“I am,” you nodded. “And I haven’t seen you either. What faculty are you in?"
"Data Science, and you?"
"Biomedicine," you replied.
"Cool!" She raised her eyebrows, and turned her body towards you to give you her full attention. "So how's that going?"
You sighed and took a sip of your beer, which was almost empty.
"I'm a new student," you set the glass down on the bar. "So I'll know after this semester."
"Oh, new student huh?" she raised an eyebrow. "I guess that's been the hardest thing so far."
Jordan then came back to you and gave her a glass as well, from the color and bubbles you guessed it was vodka and lemon soda. You hoped it was more one thing than the other, because if not, there was absolutely nothing mild about that drink.
"Don't even remind me," you said with a sigh, as she drank from her glass. "It's been a shitty three months."
"Why?" she cocked her head. "I mean, I really don't mean to be nosy, but Harvard always does a good job of integrating new students with the others."
"Yeah, but that doesn't guarantee that people will like you," you then locked eyes with Jordan, who you motioned for another beer.
"But you don't seem like a bad guy, why wouldn't people like you?"
You shrugged, taking the freshly opened bottle of beer that Jordan had given you.
"I don't know, I think it's because I look at everyone like I want to kick their butts."
She giggled, and it was so adorable that you couldn't help but smile too.
"And you want to do that?" she asked.
"Sometimes," you brought the beer close to your mouth. "With some pampered jerks." You drank.
"Ah yeah, there are plenty of those here. I'm Ashley, by the way," she extended her hand towards you.
"I'm Mason," you accepted her hand and shook it with a small smile. "And you're one of the few people I've told my name to."
The last quarter of the game had already started, but it was impossible for you to pay attention to it, because you and Ashley were engaged in a conversation that flowed like the flow of a river downhill.
She told you interesting things about her life, like for example that she no longer lived on campus and had her own apartment not far from the bar. She also told you that she lived for a few years in South Korea with her mother, and that she had returned to the United States exclusively to study her degree. You didn't have too many things in common, contrary to what usually happens in romantic movies, but you could tell that chemistry arose between the two of you. She listened to you happily while you talked about your interests and hobbies, and you listened to her too. You laughed, and a lot, which seemed unreal to you since you had counted the times you had laughed with someone since you arrived at that place.
And damn, she was so, so pretty when she laughed that it made your inner self giggle and kick. Everything about her was adorable: her voice, the way she expressed herself, her smile, her hair, and even something as silly as the way she arched her eyebrows when you told her something slightly crazy.
Calling it love at first sight was downright stupid, because you were sure that to her you were just a friendly guy to have a nice chat with, but you were smitten. It was perhaps hasty to feel that way, but you couldn't just ignore that she, apart from being beautiful, was the first person your age that you had talked to for more than half an hour without feeling like you were bothering her.
And considering your situation, well, that was quite a lot.
"I swear to god!" you said, telling her about a time you had to chase your dog for almost two streets. "If it wasn't for..."
"Ashley?" a female voice said, coming from the stairs.
You and Ashley turned around. At the bottom of the stairs were two girls, both tipsy looking. One of them walked towards you.
"We thought you had gone home!" she said, standing next to you. "You coming? We're gonna continue the party at Riley's. place"
"Oh, sure," Ashley looked at you for a moment and then back at her. "Can you wait for me downstairs? I want to say goodbye to Mason."
"Who the fuck is Mason?"
You just held up your hand with an awkward smile.
"My pleasure," you said.
"Oh, my pleasure too," she nodded and then looked at Ashley. "Hurry up then, we're about to leave!"
"Yeah yeah go Vivian," Ashley dismissed her with a carefree wave of her hand.
Vivian turned around and walked with the other girl back down to the first floor. Ashley then looked at you.
"Sorry about that, I would have loved to hear more of that story," she said with a giggle.
"Don't worry," you shook your head and looked at your watch. "I'm actually running late too, I don't want to sleep that late."
"Oh, come on then?" she asked, standing up while pointing to the stairs. "We can give you a ride to campus if you want."
"Nah no need," you said with a chuckle. "I'll finish this beer and walk, but thanks."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah yeah," you nodded. "Worse distances I've walked."
"Alright!" she shoved her hands into her jacket pockets as she took steps backwards. "It was nice meeting you, Mason, really."
"Same here. Will you be back here next weekend?"
"Mmm maybe, maybe not," she shrugged. "I don't know, it all depends on my schedule."
"I understand," you nodded. "Well, I'm here every Saturday after 6."
"Good to know," she nodded with a smile. "See you later!"
She turned to walk back down the stairs, but you couldn't just let her leave like that. Who knew when you'd see her again?
"Hey, Ashley!" you called out to her, and she stopped with one foot on the first step.
"Huh?"
"Uhm... I don't mean to be intrusive, but can I have your number?"
Ashley chuckled, and you thought you'd made a fool of yourself and she'd leave, but instead she walked back up and walked towards you.
"I don't give my number to just anyone," she said, pulling her phone out of her pocket. "But we can follow each other on Instagram."
Well, a start was a start.
"Yeah I'm cool with that!"
Ashley showed you her Instagram, and you quickly went to yours to follow her. She then followed you back.
"There ya go!" she put her phone back away, and walked backwards towards the stairs. "Well, now I really have to go, my friends are going to kill me."
"Absolutely. Take care, okay?"
"You too!" Ashley said, then turned around and walked down the stairs.
"Uhm... I don't want to be intrusive, but can I have your number?" you heard Jordan scoff behind you, followed by a laugh. "Oh my god."
You sighed and turned back to the bar.
"Shut up bro," you said, and took a long drink of your beer.
After finishing that beer you finally asked for the bill and paid before leaving. The snowfall had gotten worse outside, so you spent the whole way back to campus with your head down and your hands in the pockets of your windbreaker, but most of all, thinking about her.
You couldn't help but feel like a complete idiot. She was a girl you had just met and she already had butterflies in your stomach. But how could she not? Every time you remembered her smiling it was like seeing a cute picture of Kirby, she even sounded like him when she laughed. She was unpleasantly cute.
When you got to your dorm the first thing you did was sit down and check her Instagram. She didn't have too many posts, but the few she had were 15 photos or more. Without realizing it, you spent about ten minutes absolutely mesmerized by her beauty, but because of that you missed a damn like on an old post that you quickly deleted.
You dropped the phone and brought your hands to your mouth, staring into absolute nothingness, thinking of the possible repercussions that would have, the worst being that you were going to look like a fucking stalker. God, you were a complete idiot.
You had no choice but to try to forget about it. Pretend it hadn't happened. Instead of thinking about it, you focused on attending to the needs of your stomach, which had been growling for a couple of hours, and after that, you took a shower and went straight to bed.
Despite being constantly aware of your surroundings, you didn't see Ashley during that entire exam week. It was kind of odd: your schedules would really have to be too different for you to never see her, even from a distance, and yet, at least once at some random hour you had to see her; Harvard wasn't that big.
She did upload the occasional story to her Instagram from time to time, many of them being things from her daily life and rather few of herself, whether in mirrors or selfies with her friends. There was one day when she even uploaded a story drinking a cocktail. Who knows where. Questionable, but certainly not your problem.
However, you didn't have time to be focused on what she did or didn't do. The week had been hard as hell, as had the exams you were prepared for but still felt like constantly walking a tightrope over an abyss. You were sure you had done well in each one, but there were several study sessions that had you with a severe headache that didn't go away until it was all over.
It was an exhausting week, and emotionally one to forget. But on Friday night something happened that you didn't expect, something that had you doing backflips and running up and down the walls of your bedroom. A like from Ashley on one of your old posts.
There were a couple of ways to interpret it. It could have just been a mistake, like yours had a few days ago. But that was ruled out when you realized that she hadn't unliked your post. The other way to interpret it was that she was making fun of you and wanted to let you know that she realized what you had done.
And of course, the last way to interpret it was that... Nah, that wasn't possible. Or was it? How the hell was the human version of Kirby going to be interested in you? That was impossible. You had only talked to her once, and you didn't remember being Prince Charming exactly. You had just been you, and that wasn't enough to make a girl like you after just an hour of conversation.
Or maybe it was? Thinking about it had you stressed out. You wanted to DM her, but doing so right now would make you look like a desperate weirdo. Maybe you lacked balls, but you wanted to do everything you could to not really scare this girl away, so you were going to take things slow and not make any risky moves.
Right now all you wanted was for Saturday to come. She had been clear with you, and you knew she could just not show up at the bar tomorrow. But you were still excited about the possibility that she would. You wished she would. And you had to think back to see if you had ever been this excited to see a girl in the past few years.
When the day came you went to the bar without any expectations in order not to be disappointed if something happened. When you got upstairs Jordan greeted you with his usual cheer, and you started your evening with the usual cold beer before the start of another Celtics game.
"Ayo bro what's wrong with you?" Jordan asked an hour later, frowning. "You're acting weird as fuck."
"Huh? What do you mean?"
"You've been looking back like you're going to shoot the fuck out of this bitch and moving your leg this whole time. Look, you're doing it right now!" he pointed down.
You looked where he was pointing, and sure enough, you were moving your leg without realizing it. You also noticed that every so often you looked over your shoulder.
"First of all, I'm not going to shoot anything," you said, forcing yourself to stop your leg. "And... fuck, it's because of her."
"Her?" he raised both eyebrows. "Her who?"
"Fuck you mean her who?" You frowned.
“Ohhh! Ash?” he said, and let out a giggle.
“Aha.”
Jordan laughed and handed a ready-made drink to one of the customers near you.
“Right right,” he nodded. “Can I have your number?” he mimicked you in a silly voice. “Look, talking about Helen of Troy.”
You were two milliseconds away from turning around like the girl from the Exorcist, but you had enough self-control to turn your head like a normal person.
Ashley had just walked up the stairs, and she looked just as pretty as the last time you saw her, with her hair down, a white college sweater, and a grey scarf that still had traces of snow on it.
And as soon as she saw you, her face lit up with a smile, causing the butterflies in your stomach to go crazy.
“Uhhh you got her in your pocket bro, look at that smile!” Jordan said from behind you, close to your ear so Ashley couldn't hear. "Aight so hear me out, I'll give you a hand, you'll see."
You frowned.
"Wait what?" You turned to look at him, but he had already played dumb and gone on to serve another customer.
Ashley came to your side at that moment, taking the free seat to your right, just like last time.
"Hi Mason! Hi Jordan!" she greeted you both, but focused her attention on you.
"Sup," you greeted back, turning to her. "I'm glad you came."
"Yeah well, I finished all my homework early and also studied enough to be free today."
"Oh really? Free to see someone, maybe?" you raised your eyebrows and took a sip of your beer.
"Mmm, I don't know," she shrugged, a hint of a smile on her lips. "I was really in the mood for a drink on a Saturday."
You chuckled and nodded.
"Aight, you want a beer then? It's on me, and I insist."
"Yeah I'm cool with that!" she nodded.
"On my way!" Jordan said.
"Thanks bro," you said, then looked at Ashley. "So? How was torture week for you?"
The smile on Ashley's face faded, and her eyes wandered to an empty glass on the bar.
"I mean..." she cocked her head and made an awkward face. "Well, I think? I don't have too many hopes for myself, but I don't feel like I did a bad job either," she looked at you. "What about you?"
"Exhausting," you sighed. "But I feel like I'll pass everything with flying colors. Do you feel like you didn't study hard enough or what?"
"Something like that. Let's just say I got a little too confident."
Jordan came over with your beers and placed them in front of each of you. You both smiled at him in thanks.
"Why do I feel like that cocktail drinking story has something to do with it?" you asked with a raised eyebrow.
Ashley was about to drink from her beer when she burst out laughing, having to set the glass down on the table so she wouldn't spill it. You looked at her with a smile, gobsmacked by her cuteness.
“Hey!” she snapped between laughs. “That was just an hour!”
“But it was enough to distract you,” you said before sipping on your beer.
“Nah, I’m good at dividing up my schedule.”
“6 hours of drinking and another two for studying?”
She laughed again, and this time she gave you a small, friendly punch on the shoulder.
“No, silly. You’re really into my stories huh?”
“I spend a lot of time on Instagram, so I end up checking them all the time and accidentally,” you shrugged.
“Accidentally, I see,” she nodded slowly. “Same as that like, right?”
Your hand froze around the glass of beer, where you looked with a smile of being on the ropes.
“Yup, same as that like,” you looked into her eyes. "And yours? Was that accidental too or what?"
She gently shook her head, holding your gaze.
"Nope, that was completely on purpose."
A smile escaped you. Things were flowing smooth as butter. It was up to you not to screw up.
"So you did come here today to see someone huh?"
"Maybe," she brought a hand to a lock of her hair to play with it. "And you seemed to be waiting for someone today."
"You," you said, not really thinking about it beforehand, just a shot in the air.
"Oh really?" she raised both eyebrows, now curling her lock of hair. "But you always come here, not this day at this time?"
"Yeah, but the difference is that now I've been waiting all week for Saturday to come."
Ashley giggled and looked away, now playing with her fingers in her lap.
"To see me?" she asked, and looked at you again.
"To see you," you nodded.
"What if I didn't come?"
"Eventually you would," you shrugged. "Pure statistics. But the odds increase if you wanted to see me too."
Ashley was quiet for a moment, just like you had been when she brought up the subject of you liking her post, a half smile on her face and her gaze on her glass. She then shrugged.
"You got me, I guess," she said.
"It wasn't that hard either. Hey, do you want to get something to eat?" you asked, changing the subject.
"Like what?" she said, and took a long drink of her beer.
"I don't know, they make some pretty tasty stuff downstairs. Maybe something sweet?"
"Mmm, nutella waffles?"
"Oh hell yeah, and they make some amazing cookie sandwiches too."
“That’s a yes then!”
“You wanna go sit over there?” you nodded behind her, towards one of the tables in the corner.
“Sure, let’s go,” Ashley replied with a smile as you both stood up from the bar.
As you passed, you glanced at Jordan, who was watching you with a mix of expectation and complicity. In response, he winked at you and discreetly dimmed the lights in the bar. The atmosphere changed instantly: the shadows lengthened, the warm lighting accentuated the textures of the brick walls and created an intimate space at the table you chose.
You owed that guy one.
The table in question was a cozy booth, with a brown leather corner sofa and high backs set against the brick wall. Ashley slid into the seat and sat right in the corner.
“I’ll go place the orders, wait here, will you?” you said, setting your glass of beer down next to hers.
Ashley just nodded with a cute smirk on her face, and then you hurried downstairs. You placed the order as quickly as you could, with a couple of milkshakes on top of the waffles and sandwiches, and then returned to her, sitting down to the side.
"I hope you like the lemon pie milkshakes, they're delicious," you said, arranging the plates and glasses on the table.
"I love lemon pie," she said, picking up one of the milkshakes to drink from the straw. "Did the stalking pay off or what?"
A laugh escaped you.
"Sweetheart, as much as I tried, I haven't been following you long enough to know that."
"Oh, you're calling me sweetheart now?" she raised an eyebrow.
"Uh... I'm sorry, does it bother you?"
Ashley then moved closer to you. It was really something very subtle, but you noticed it by the closeness of your thighs.
"It's cute, why would it bother me?" she said, holding your gaze.
You were closer than you'd ever been at that moment. It could happen, and you had a feeling she wanted it, but after looking at her lips a few times you decided not to push your luck too much.
"I don't know," you shrugged. "Some people find it uncomfortable, and I wouldn't want to make you feel that way."
She stayed quiet as she looked at you. You frowned in confusion.
"What?" you said.
"You're really cute, Mason," Ashley replied, in a lower tone. "I don't know if anyone's ever told you that."
The way you folded yourself into seven separate pieces was a bit hard to hide, but you were sure it had to have shown on your cheeks as they felt warm from the blush.
“I-I… ah…” you felt like an idiot getting stuck on your own words; your brain had short-circuited for a few seconds. “No. At least not here.”
Ashley placed a hand on your thigh, near your knee. A statue could be more alive than you at that moment.
“That’s a shame, because you really are.”
You once again tried to say something, but only a silly stutter came out of your mouth that ended in silence. It was your chance.
“Shall we eat?” she said, before you could lunge in and kiss her. She didn’t notice your intentions, so she didn’t have to have done it on purpose. Still, it was pretty inopportune.
“Ah… yeah,” you nodded, turning back to the plates and milkshakes. "Sure, sure."
There was silence between you as you began to eat, but not an awkward silence, rather a peaceful one, which made it clear that both you and she were comfortable with each other. Only after a couple of minutes passed did you resume the conversation, which this time was oriented towards anecdotes and interesting facts about your lives. Needless to say, you felt like you could talk to her about anything and she would be just as happy to listen to you, as you would to her.
But you needed to kiss her. You really, really needed to.
"Gosh those waffles are really crazy stuff," Ashley said with the milkshake in her hand, once you had finished eating.
"What about the cookie sandwiches?" you asked with a smile.
"I wasn't that big of a fan, but they were good too," she shrugged.
You chuckled.
"Fair enough, we can't all have excellent tastes."
Ashley laughed and nudged you slightly. You stared at her. Noticing this, she tilted her head and frowned.
"What?" she asked.
"You're so fucking cute, Ashley," you said, admiring every detail of her pretty face, dimly illuminated by the warm light of the bar's spherical lamps. "You really are."
That took her by surprise. She blinked several times, visibly stunned by such a sudden statement, but as she processed the information, her lips curved into a small smirk.
"You think so?" she asked in a low tone, and brought her hand back to your thigh, now closer to your crotch, awakening in you thoughts that were no longer so innocent.
"Yeah, I think so," you said, and put your right arm in front of her abdomen to grab her waist. You couldn't tell from the baggy clothes the weather forced you two to wear, but she had a small waist and a tummy that you found extremely sexy.
"So what are you waiting for?" She squeezed your thigh with her fingers.
"Waiting for what?" You pressed her closer, your faces now inches apart.
Ashley leaned in close to your ear.
"To take me downstairs to the bathroom and fuck me," she whispered, and pulled back to look you in the eyes again. "And kiss me, of course."
W-h-a-t?
You blinked a few times, confused by what you had just heard. Was she the same Ashley? Had you gotten distracted and she had switched with her evil twin? It wasn't like it bothered you, but it was such a drastic change that it seemed unreal.
"Wow," you said with a chuckle, and brought the hand on her waist up to her thigh to brush the side of your finger against her crotch. "In that order?"
Ashley moved her hand up and placed it on your bulge to give it a single, firm squeeze.
"As you prefer," she said, biting her lip as she looked down at yours.
And then you kissed her.
From the beginning, it was difficult for you to control yourself from making a scene in front of everyone's eyes, because her lips had a delicious pineapple flavor that drove you crazy and made you want to devour her like a maniac. For the moment, you had to settle for that slow, discreet kiss, like the one any couple shared at a bar.
Ashley was forced to remove her hand from your bulge, and you were forced to remove yours from near her crotch. Instead she left her hands still in her own lap and you just continued to squeeze her thigh with your hand. As the seconds passed your breathing became heavier, and by the way she shifted in her seat you knew that it was enough of kissing and it was time to move on to the fun part.
"To the bathroom downstairs then?" you asked against her lips.
"The one on the basement floor," she clarified. "There won't be anyone down there at this hour."
"Do you scream a lot or what?" you teased.
"Take me there and find out."
You smiled and took her hand before standing up. You both walked out of the stall and straight to the first floor, where Ashley stepped away from you.
"Let me go first," she said, steps away from the exit. "I wouldn't want us to be so brazen either."
"Aight go," you nodded.
Ashley walked out of the bar and headed down to the basement. You waited for about five minutes before heading in that same direction, leaving the bar to go left and down the stairs that led to the basement. Just like Ashley said, there were like four people down there counting the bartender, so it wouldn't be a problem.
Absolutely no one paid you any attention as you walked through the room. Good for you, because you were able to enter the ladies' room without any opposition. Inside it wasn't hard for you to guess where Ashley was: she was in the back stall, with her hand sticking out of the half-open door.
Rushing in there you found her waiting patiently for you, leaning against the wall with her other hand behind her back.
"You're late," Ashley joked with a mischievous smirk as you locked the bathroom door.
"I'll go if you want," you pointed with your thumb.
"Nuh-uh, come here," she said, and grabbed your face with both hands before crashing her lips against yours.
With no potential stares now, you two were free to let loose, your tongues now entering the equation just seconds into the kiss, which was becoming more and more wild and sloppy. Ashley lowered one hand to the side of your neck, and brought the other to your cock to squeeze and massage it over your pants. You, for your part, were met with a pair of firm, round buttocks as you lowered your hands and squeezed them. She let out a small moan against your lips, and brought her other hand down to unbutton your pants, unzipping them, and reaching into your boxers to cup your cock with her delicate fingers and slowly stroke it.
"You must be freezing from the weather," she murmured after moving a few inches away from your lips. "Maybe I can give you some warmth."
With that Ashley dropped to her knees in front of you and pulled your pants and boxers down to your ankles. With your cock released in front of her face, she placed wet kisses on the underside, moved down to your balls to lick them, and then back to your tip to catch it between her lips and suck on it.
"Fuck Ashley..." you gasped, bringing a hand to her silky brown hair to push it out of her face.
She gave your tip a couple of sucks and pulled you out to slowly jerk you off.
"Still cold?" Ashley asked. "Don't worry, I got you."
With that she placed her hands on your thighs and opened her mouth to take your cock inside her. Now her lips went further, slowly going millimeters past the middle of your shaft to come back up and start sucking you off. She made eye contact with you, which made your cheeks feel hot since until a few hours ago you only saw her as a giggly adorable princess, and now that cute princess was giving you a sloppy, sensual blowjob.
"Fuck that's perfect Ash," you moaned, watching as she pumped her head at a steady pace, slurping up the saliva she left behind and also using her tongue to lick the underside of your shaft.
"Warm enough?" Ashley asked after pulling you out, now kissing the sides of your cock while rubbing her fingers along the first few inches of it. "I still have a little magic trick."
She put her hands on your thighs and took your cock back into her mouth. This time, after a few sucks halfway down your shaft, her mouth went further and further until it reached your base, where her nose rested for a few long, fascinating seconds as your tip brushed the walls of her throat.
And yes, it was fucking warm. Overwhelmingly so, you dare say.
“Shit…” you moaned, letting your head fall back and bringing your hand to the back of Ashley’s neck.
A couple seconds later she released your cock with a couple of coughs and heavy gasps, and continued to jerk you off while wiping her spit-stained chin.
“Better?” she asked.
“Ashley… what the fuck was that,” you managed to say, now looking into her eyes. “The last thing I would think when I saw your face is that you give amazing blowjobs.”
“And I have a pretty tight pussy too, just so you know.”
You were officially going crazy.
“May I taste it?” you asked.
Ashley smiled and stood up, turned around and bent over with her hands braced against the wall of the stall. She then looked over her shoulder at you and looked down at your cock rubbing against her ass. You immediately got on your knees behind her, grabbed the hem of her sweatpants and pulled them down.
“Oh fuck,” was the only thing you could think to say. Her ass was a complete beauty: it was small, but the shape of her buttocks and how soft her skin looked made it look like a whole snack.
“You like it?” she asked, slowly swinging it from side to side.
"I have a way to answer that," you said, and placed both hands on either side of her hip before you began kissing every spot on her pretty ass, not stopping until both pale cheeks were covered in your saliva and your teeth marked on the fleshiest areas.
With your entrance already covered you wanted to move on to the main course as quickly as possible, so you grabbed her light blue panties—already with a wet spot in the middle—and pulled them down to her ankles along with her sweatpants, rolled around her feet. Her pussy was as pretty as her face, shaved, smooth, pink and shiny from how wet it was. You plunged your mouth in there without a second's thought.
"Mmmgh," Ashley moaned, pushing her hips back to bury your face between her ass cheeks, which you parted so you could easily taste her delicious, silky folds with your tongue.
The bathroom stall was soon filled with cute, low moans. You ate her pussy slowly at first, not wanting to look like a desperate fucking lunatic. But it was clear that wasn't going to last too long, not when her wet flesh was this delicious and her hips moved in such an adorable way as the pleasure built in her.
"Oh fuck I knew you'd be good with that fucking tongue," she gasped, her legs suffering from spontaneous tremors.
"You do?" you asked with an incredulous giggle, and squeezed her ass cheeks. "Apparently I was the only one with innocent intentions then."
"Don't get me wrong, me too," she looked over her shoulder at you, biting her lip. "But I also wanted you to eat my pussy really bad."
"Slutty behavior if you ask me," you said, and sank your mouth back into her pussy before she could protest.
Ashley moaned louder and pushed her hips back. Hard, to smother you with her ass. You contently let her do it at this point, more focused on licking between her folds and giving you a treat than your own breathing. This paid off a few seconds later, when the muscles in her thighs contracted and she burst into moans, grinding her ass into your face.
“Oh fuck!” she squealed under her breath, holding back from screaming louder. “Hurry up and fuck me for god’s sake!”
You stood up and bent over your pants bunched around your ankles to pull your wallet out of your pocket. Only to realize what a fucking problem there was: you hadn’t brought a fucking condom.
Were you fucking stupid or what?
“Shit,” you cursed under your breath, eyeing the wallet.
Ashley turned to look at you with a scowl.
“What’s wrong?”
“I didn’t bring… well, you know.”
“A condom?” She raised an eyebrow. "Mason fuck the fucking condom fuck me already!"
Well, if things were that way you weren't going to refuse; you were too horny to think of the most responsible decision at the moment.
"Yeah you're damn right."
You dropped your wallet to the floor and focused entirely on her. Your left hand went to her waist, and with your right you grabbed your cock to bring it between her ass cheeks and rubbed the tip between her folds just a couple of times before pressing forward. You and Ashley moaned as you took the first few inches inside her.
"Oh fuck slow slow slow," she said, and you slowly took every inch of your cock inside her. "Oh yes that feels so fucking good!"
"You weren't lying about having a tight pussy, fuck," you panted already balls deep inside her, her pussy walls squeezing your cock.
"You like it huh?" she asked, looking into your eyes. "Then you better fuck it properly."
"Bet," you said, and began to rock your hips back and forth, patiently increasing the pace so as not to hurt her. Before long the thrusts became consistent, your cock going completely in and out of that smothering pussy and your smacks against her ass reverberating through the empty bathroom.
Ashley bent lower on her back, leaning with her forearms against the wall of the stall as you fucked her faster, clinging to her small waist and making her buttocks jiggle. The bubble of pleasure you were both locked in made you quickly forget you were in a public place, so it got to a point where you were making a downright shameless fuss.
Until you heard voices approaching.
Ashley's eyes widened and she looked at you. You stopped, and your first instinct was to push her away from the wall, wrap an arm around her body and sit on the closed toilet lid (which thankfully didn't break). She was smart enough to understand what you wanted to do, so she grabbed her sweatpants and panties, pulled them off her ankles and pulled her feet up onto your knees at the exact moment two girls walked in talking.
"Yeah I don't know why he acts like that," one of the girls said, and you heard a sink turn on. "But then her fucking bitch of a best friend comes and says I'm the toxic one!"
You covered Ashley's mouth, and with her hands resting on each wall of the stall, she slowly went up and down on your cock, while you, with your free hand, rubbed her clit at the same discreet rhythm.
"Bitch cut it with that son of a bitch already!" said the other. "You've put up with too much shit from him lately."
"Fuck, should I?"
"Fuck you mean should I?! He spent a night with that hoe!"
If you didn't have Ashley moving up and down on your cock in that delicious way you would have laughed. But you did have to reinforce your fingers in her mouth, because she let out a moan that was luckily drowned out by the sound of the sink running.
"But he has a big dick!" The girl protested.
The other girl growled in frustration, and this time you did manage to let out a smile that almost turned into a chuckle.
"I can't stand you bitch, I swear to god."
The faucet turned off, and now you and Ashley were helpless if they stayed any longer and paid attention to where you were.
"I still want him to break up with me, not me him. I don't want any trouble with that damn bitch," the other girl said, and now her voice was fortunately heard further away.
"Are you chickening out or what?" the other girl replied, already out of the bathroom.
The conversation was no longer understandable to you, indicating that they finally left the bathroom. You took your hand off Ashley's mouth, and she was free to let out a relieved sigh followed by a moan.
"Fucking annoying bitches," she hissed, then slid her feet off your knees to replace them with her hands and bounced on your cock harder. "God that cock feels so good I wanna cry."
You brought your hands to her waist and reveled in the sight of your cock fully entering and exiting her pretty little body. Ashley bounced hard and fast, filling the bathroom with clapping sounds and inconspicuous moans. Her ass cheeks looked so pretty doing it that you couldn't help but squeeze both together and leave a spank on one, and she responded with a cute squeal.
"Turn around, I wanna kiss you," you panted with your hand on her lower back.
Ashley complied, and immediately rose off your cock to turn around and straddle you, her legs hanging over the sides of the toilet. You wrapped an arm around her waist, crashed your lips against hers and made her impale herself on your cock again.
With a moan against your lips she began to move on your cock as fast as she could, because the position wasn't exactly the most comfortable for her. For you, however, it was more attainable since you could simply plant your feet firmly on the floor and fuck her up and down. Ashley, relieved by this, wrapped her arms around your head and held onto your hair as you fucked her.
"Oh god I'm gonna cum so hard," she gasped into the kiss. "Fuck keep going!"
You brought your hands up to her ass to squeeze and grope it again before cranking up the engine. Ashley let her head fall back and held onto your neck with both hands, quickly being dragged into an orgasm that had her writhing and grinding her hips on top of you.
As she was riding out her climax you took the moment to kiss her pretty pale neck and under her chin, arms wrapped around her petite, quivering body to keep it pressed to yours at all times. Then, when you felt like you could continue, you used the strength in your legs to stand up with her carried. Ashley had a little scare, but still managed to hold on with her legs to your torso until you pressed her against the left wall of the stall, spread her legs wide, and with your hands behind her knees continued to hammer her pussy.
"You know I'd love to?" you asked, peppering the side of her neck with kisses.
"W-what?" she managed to reply despite her ragged breathing.
"Seeing your pretty princess face painted white," you said, and moved up to her jawline.
"Let me finish you off then, handsome," she panted with her hands on your back. "I could use a hot load for my skin."
You immediately pulled out of her pussy, lowered her, and she got on her knees in front of you, her head resting against the wall behind her. She caught your tip with her lips, sucked on it, and gripped her fingers to your shaft to stroke it at full speed. The eye contact was more intense than you expected, as Ashley's eyes went from being two pretty, shiny orbs to the eyes of a feline predator eager for its prey. If that wasn't enough, the girl was naughty enough to also grab your balls and give them such a good massage that you exploded without even warning.
Feeling a drop of your load inside her mouth, Ashley quickly pulled you out of it to masturbate you fiercely and receive every jet of cum on her pretty face. Every corner was covered in thick white liquid, in a perfect work of art that was deeply contrasted by the place you were in.
She moved her wrist slower as you stopped shooting jets, and finally took you back into her mouth to suck and clean every possible inch of your shaft.
"Fuck... so beautiful," you managed to say between gasps, admiring her face covered in cum all over.
"And if you behave from now on you can have this as many times as you want, baby," she said, and blew you a little kiss. "Pass me some toilet paper please."
You did so, and first helped her stand up before helping her wipe her face. Then you got dressed, and spent at least another five minutes just making out. It was she who pulled away from you with a small smile on her face.
"Do you want to spend the night with me?" she asked.
"Yes!" you replied embarrassingly quickly and nodded. "I'd love to."
Ashley giggled and opened the stall door.
"I'll go first, but first, your phone," she held out her hand.
"Huh, for what?"
"Just give it to me."
You pulled your phone out of your pocket and handed it to her already unlocked. She then typed for less than a minute and handed it back to you.
"Here, you earned it," she told you, winked at you and walked out of the stall and out of the bathroom.
You looked down, and what you saw was her contact with her damn number.
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Spren Notes: Consider this just a starter to welcome the best time of the year, hehehe. Btw, with Gowon there are already 2 of the 12 LOONA girls. Hope to be able to write all of them sooner or later. As always. Thanks for reading! MASTERLIST HERE!
#gowon smut#loossemble smut#loona smut#kpop smut#smut fanfic#male reader smut#x male reader insert#smut
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Morning. For the Friends Au it appears that Winter is trying to reach out to Jaune... and maybe he sees it and it's confusing him as to why.
Does her each out to Saphron and Terra, and seek their advice?
On a side note, great series. Looking to further posts as you have time.
Specialist J.A.
Winter: Specialist Jaune Arc. It has a nice ring to it. Don't you agree?
Jaune: It has a bit of ring to it... But, it's not as special as you're making it sound.
Winter: You should be proud, Jaune: You're the youngest person to ever be accepted as a, Specialist, and the first person of none, Atlasian descent to become one. So, take pride in your accomplishments, Jaune.
Jaune: Okay, being the first none, Atlasian to join the, Specialist doesn't sound like that much of an achievement. But, am I really the youngest member?
Winter: Oh yes, I was twenty when I joined, most others, Specialist were around twenty one as well when they joined. You are nineteen years old; You are the youngest member to ever join the, Specialist!
Jaune: Wait really...? Wait, twenty? Does that mean you're around twenty three then?
Winter: Careful, Arc... You should know better than to ask a lady her age...
Jaune: I-I-I'm sorry! I've just been curious how old are!
Winter: And, why do wish to know that?
Jaune: I was just curious!
Winter: Curious...?
Jaune: Yeah. You have this ageless beauty about you, Winter. So, I've always been curious.
Winter: Ageless beauty...?
Winter: Ahem! So... So what do you think of your new uniform?
Winter changed the topic as she looked away from, Jaune hiding a faint blush threatening to spread across her face. Meanwhile, Jaune looked at his reflection taking in his new, Specialist uniform.
It wasn't what, Jaune had expected, but he loved it nonetheless. It was similar to the uniforms to the rest of the, Specialist work as in style.
Jaune's uniform was more of a long sleeve sweater than a dress shirt. A zipper ran up the middle of it to the high collar. A sleave that ran over zipper to connect to a series of buckle buttons on the side. The front was a vibrant white with red stripes running along the side. The rest was the vibrant deep blue that was commonly found on, Atlasian uniforms.
His blue denim jeans had been replace with black combat cargo pants, giving him extra pockets to store necessary supplies. His boots had also been chaged for more modern combat boots, rather than the surplus boots, Ruby tends to wear. He found the boots quite nice, there was space in the boots he could fit something like a knife in it, perhaps her should do something like that.
Jaune: I didn't expect the blue would fit me so well. I know the red, and white suit me. But, I was never sure of the blue.
Winter: The blue is quite fetching on you; it matches your eyes quite well.
Jaune: Really? T-Thanks...
Winter: Your welcome. So, how does your armour feel?
Jaune: Mmmm... It feels a little tight; I think I need to ask one of the armourers to readjust it for me.
Winter: I see... Well, you can ask the armourers to resize it for you, that shouldn't be a problem for them. In fact, they could forge you new armour if you want.
Jaune: New armour? I know my armour is pretty good as it is, but would I be able to get some of that, Paladin Armour plating if I asked?
Winter: Hmmm...?
Winter: That’s a possibility… You'll have to ask about it.
Jaune: Okay, I'll ask them to remake, Crocea Mors then... It's probably best if I ask for, General Ironwood’s permission first. I suspected considering the metal this is used for your, Paladins its restricted from personal use.
Winter: While I'm not sure about that myself. But, I'm sure he'll agree to it, at least he may eventually let you do that. Once you prove your worth to, Atlas.
Jaune: That's fair. He's already upgraded my gear as is. It feels a little greedy of me to ask for another upgrade.
Winter: So, everything alright with your new uniform, Jaune?
Jaune: My armour is a little snug, but everything else is just fine. But, what's with this sash?
Jaune pulled out a deep rich crimson sash with a white snowflake pattern on the edge of it. Jaune looked at the beautiful needle work before staring at, Winter. She looked away as a small blush crossed her face.
Jaune: Winter?
Winter: I uhh... I got you a gift...
Jaune: A gift?
Winter: Yes, a gift to celebrate you're joining the, Specialist core. I would have gotten you something else, but I wasn't sure what... what you would like...
Jaune ran his thumb across the sash marveling on the smooth fabric, and the intricate detail woven into the snowflake.
His mind wondered at the red sash, he wore, Pyrrha's stash as a memento of her, the gold of his armour was also from her. He worse it keep her close to him. But, maybe...?
Winter: Do you... Do you like it, Jaune?
Jaune's mind was running until he saw a flash of red, and gold in his eyes, his eyes moved up to see the ghost of, Pyrrha looking at him. A smile spread across her face as she nodded her head, and gestured to the sash. Jaune's eyes darted to the crimson sash in his hands before looking back at, Pyrrha, and realizing she was gone.
Jaune smiled as his hands reached down, and grab the sash before wrapping it around his waist. Jaune looked down at the sash, then at it in his reflection. He nodded his head before turning to look at, Winter with a smile on his face.
Jaune: Thank you, Winter, it's beautiful.
Jaune hand pulled on the sash to move it so it ran parrel with his hip, while he was fiddling with it, Winter stepped forward, and readjusted it so it would look better.
Winter: Oh thank goodness... I was worried you wouldn't like it. I rarely get presents for my siblings, I've never gotten one for someone else so I was really... worried...
Winter's rambling was cut short as she finished adjusting, Jaune's sash before standing back up staring directly into, Jaune's cerulean blue eyes, their faces mere centimeters apart.
Jaune: I uhhh...
Winter: Y-Yes...?
Red slowly creeped across their faces before the game of chicken was called to the end as the both turned away,. Brushing away their blushes in the process.
Winter: S-So... did... Did you tell your teammates about you're appointment to the, Specialist's?
Jaune: Uhh... no.
Winter: Do you plan to?
Jaune: They'll find out eventually. Just like when I learned that they forgot to invite me to, Ruby's birthday party the other day.
Winter: What? They did, when?
Jaune: They texted me my invitation when I was about to talk to, General Ironwood about me becoming a, Specialist.
Winter: The message you said was from, 'no one important.'
Jaune: Yep, that one.
Winter: You don't see them as anyone important in your lives now do you?
Jaune: Just returning the favour...
Winter: I see. Well then... Specialist Arc!
Jaune: Sir!
Winter: Are you ready for your first mission as a, Specailst?
Jaune: Yes, Sir!
Winter: Good! You will follow me to the cafeteria where we, Specialist will be holding your initiation!
Jaune: Yes, Sir. May I ask what this incitation process will be, Sir?
Winter: Yes, to survive, Marrows cooking!
Jaune: ...
Jaune: Eh?
Winter: The incitation is just a simple welcome party with food, drink, and cake that we, Specialist have. We're expected to each bring in our own food, hand crafted, or store bought. Marrow insists on bringing his family's chili recipe.
Winter: It taste terrible...
Jaune: Chili? Well... now I'm worried about the surviving bit... Should I bring something?
Winter: If you want to, but you're the guest of honour you don't have to.
Jaune: Why don't I cook something edible then. Something we can all enjoy.
Winter: You can cook?
Jaune: Seven sisters, and not a chef among the lot of them.
Winter: Well then, I'm looking forward to whatever it is you plan to make.
Jaune: When is the party?
Winter: This evening around six.
Jaune: That give me... five hours. I can whip up something nice by then. I best get to it. But, I'm going to change first. Don't want flour on my new uniform now.
Winter: I'll see you later then.
Jaune: till later then.
Winter soon made her way to the exit as, Jaune started unbuckling his armour. As the door opened, Winter stopped to say one last thing to, Jaune.
Winter: Oh, and Jaune...?
Jaune: Yes?
Winter: You... You don't need to call me, Sir, or Specialist Schnee... Just call me, Winter, okay?
Jaune: Okay... Winter...
Winter: Thank you~!
Winter smiled a sweet smile as she left, leaving, Jaune behind dumbfounded as he nervously swallowed.
Jaune: Shit...
Jaune: She does like me...
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He'd forced himself to stay out of bed until at least eight o'clock. Glancing at the clock on the wall every two minutes as he flipped through the channels on TV. He had exited out of his DVR pretty quickly. Most of the things on there were shows that Buck had recorded for them to watch together later. There was a documentary on beetles of the world that they had only gotten halfway through before they were stumbling into the bedroom, not that Tommy minded. He'd never really wanted to watch the documentary in the first place. Now he'd give anything to have Evan beside him, talking over everything the narrator said.
He wanted today to be over. Wanted to fall asleep and wake up and it be another normal day. Just Friday, November 29th. Nothing special about that.
The second it hit eight, Tommy was shutting off the TV and getting up to head to his room. He stopped as he passed the front door. He swore he could hear something on the other side of it. A rustling, mixed with someone cursing under their breath.
He sighed. He was supposed to be getting a new part for his truck delivered soon, and the guy probably tossed it, angry about having to make deliveries on Thanksgiving.
He flipped on the light before opening the door, freezing when he saw it was definitely not some random delivery guy on the other side.
"Ev- Buck? Why are... What?"
"I dropped the pie," Buck whined, scooping pumpkin pie off of Tommy's front porch and plopping it back into its container.
It took Tommy a second to understand what was happening. There was a brown bag by the door, filled to the top with containers, and a couple more containers beside it.
Then there was the pie, most of it back in the container with some smeared in Buck's hand, and remnants on the porch. There would be ants everywhere by morning. But that was a tomorrow problem.
"Here, Buck, it's fine, just-"
"You weren't supposed to come out yet," Buck explained in a bit of a panic. He was still bent over, picking at the crust on the ground. "I was gonna ring the doorbell and go before you got to the door."
"You were gonna ding dong ditch me?" Tommy asked, trying to lighten the mood. When it didn't work, he took a step closer to Buck, "Buck, seriously, it's fine. You didn't need to do all this."
Finally, Buck stood, his pumpkin covered hand held out. "Well, I know you don't wanna see me or talk to me, but I wanted you to have some of the food because when we planned everything it was with you in mind, and we had a lot leftover and I knew you wouldn't fix yourself anything and-"
"Buck, just... just come in and wash your hands, please, okay? I'll grab the food."
Buck took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "I'll be in and out."
Tommy stepped to the side, letting Buck in first. He grabbed up all the food and followed behind him into the kitchen. "Feels like there's enough here to feed me for a week."
"I figured you might want to take some into work with you, or freeze it or something," Buck replied, scrubbing the pumpkin off his hand.
"I appreciate it. You, um, you really didn't have to do all this. I did end up making some Thanksgiving foods for myself."
Buck huffed out a laugh. "What? Stovetop stuffing and cranberry sauce?" He grabbed the towel from beside the sink and turned to Tommy looking at him from across the kitchen island, his face blank and eyes a little red. Buck shook his head. "Sorry, that was mean, I- I didn't mean it to sound like that."
"It's fine. You're not wrong about that, actually."
"Still, I, uh, I shouldn't have said it like that. Sorry." He dropped the towel back by the sink and pushed himself away from the counter. "I'm gonna go, but Happy... Happy Thanksgiving, Tommy."
Tommy pursed his lips as Buck walked by, heading for the door. Part of him was saying to keep quiet, let him go. The other part told him he was an idiot if he did that.
"You are wrong about something though," he blurted, stopping Buck before he could get too far.
Buck turned back to him. "What's that?"
"I have wanted to see you, and talk to you."
They stared at each other for a moment, both of their hearts thumping in their chests.
"You have?" Buck questioned. "Could've fooled me."
Yeah, he deserved that. "Listen, are you hungry at all?" Tommy asked. "I could get this warmed up and we could eat, talk, fight, whatever. I... I feel like I left a little too soon and you deserve more of an explanation than what I gave you. No pressure though, if you wanna go, I'll understand, I just think-"
"I could eat," Buck interrupted. "As long as you mean it all. Even the fighting part."
Tommy smiled softly. "I would really, really love to fight with you this Thanksgiving, Evan."
"You sure?"
Tommy nodded.
"Okay then," Buck agreed. "I'd really, really love to fight with you too."
“The team is off this year, and you are too, so I’m going to show you what a real Thanksgiving looks like.”
That’s what Buck had told him a month ago, a late night discussion in bed at the loft, Buck’s shoulder healed enough to lie down but Tommy making no effort to leave him.
Being off for Thanksgiving was rare, both of them being off was practically a miracle. Buck was determined not to waste it.
He’d asked Tommy about what his Thanksgivings were like growing up. Tommy had told him, the first few he could remember were his dad yelling about something not being done right and his mom ending up in the bedroom crying.
After she died, there was no more Thanksgiving at all. The only thing Tommy would do, more for his mom than anything else, is make her “special homemade dressing” (a box of Stovetop), and cranberry sauce. He’d eat it alone in the kitchen while his dad downed one beer after another in his chair in the living room, watching whatever game was on.
And once he was an adult, he worked pretty much every Thanksgiving, so he didn’t think much of it.
Buck had kissed him hard after that, promised this year would be different. They’d all be at Maddie and Chimney’s place, but everyone was going to pitch in with the cooking. There would be kids running around, and games, and way too much food, and maybe once everyone else left they’d watch a Christmas movie.
Tommy played it cool, but he felt like a kid on the inside. He was so excited. He’d get to be with his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s family, which were his friends too. There would be laughter and embarrassing stories told. The kids would be getting excited for Christmas and he’d ask Jee what she was wanting so he could get her present sorted out. It would be perfect.
Tommy cleared his throat as he turned off the stove, blinking away the tears in his eyes. He set the stuffing on the back burner, letting it sit while he scooped two spoonfuls of cranberry sauce on his plate. From the fridge he grabbed a beer and set it at the table. Then he went back to the stuffing and stirred it, satisfied with the thickness. He added a bit more than a regular serving size to his plate, then walked back to the table.
From his seat he could hear the game on in the living room. If he pretended enough, he could imagine his dad in there. At least then he wouldn’t be alone.
#911 abc#bucktommy#evan buckley#tommy kinard#i had to add a part two because apparently I'm 'destroying thanksgiving for everyone'#my APOLOGIES
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Requesting Noah x reader where the reader experiences post partum depression after giving birth to their newborn baby girl.
Post partum depression is no joke and something so many women, including myself, have had to deal with. I wish it on no new mom. But, when you have a good partner who supports you entirely, it makes all the difference🥰
PostPartum
Tag list: @philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @thisbicc @lma1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa @mrsnoahsebastian @flowery-mess @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @stardustsirenmelody @romanreigns-supreme @anything-more-than-human @into-the-grey @rumoured-whispers @myownthoughts12 @sister-sebastian @nyxthedestroyerofworlds-deactiv @missduffsblog @bngurngheart @somebodyllelse @xxkittenkissesxx @fadingangelwisp @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard
I held her in my arms like she was the most valuable thing in the world. To me she was. She was my daughter. She was the best part of me and her mother put together, a treasure created out of pure love.
I looked over at my wife, watching as she delivered the remaining proof of her pregnancy, feeling nothing but pride and respect for her. What I had just witnessed in the last thirteen hours was nothing short of an absolute miracle.
I had no idea how difficult it was for a woman to give birth until now. The strength and resilience I saw in her made me see her and all women in a whole new light. It was an indescribable yet incredible feeling.
She looked up at me, smiling her beautiful yet exhausted smile. She looked completely different now; she was a mother. I grinned back, offering her our daughter and gently laid her on her chest when she said yes.
"Noah, she has your nose and your eyes," my wife gushed, kissing our little girl's rosy forehead.
"She really does, doesn't she?" I marveled, unable to hide my grin. I kissed my wife's forehead, praising her over and over for what she went through for us. I had what I'd always wanted. I had my family.
Days after we came home were a struggle. The nights were sleepless, the days exhausting. The constant feeding and changing diapers was a lot of work I wasn't prepared for. But neither was my wife.
She started crying more than usual. At first, it was simple little tears, but then there were days where those tears lingered all day and sometimes into the night, too. They would lead into spurts of her doubting her ability to be a mother and caring for our baby the way she needed to be cared for.
That's when she would say things like, "Our daughter does better when I'm not around. Maybe it's for the best", or "I just want to disappear. All of this is too much."
I knew she was exhausted, not mentally prepared for any of this, so I did my best to help take the burden off her shoulders, hoping it would help. Sometimes it did, but most of the time I think it only made things worse.
A few weeks went by, and things began to mellow out some; with our daughter at least. We got into a routine and a schedule of sleep, making the nights more bearable.
But my wife would still have her spouts of irritability, sometimes waking up and starting things for no reason. It was usually over little things like dishes or clothes, but then it started to become bigger. She accused me of not being home enough and not helping out enough which would always end with her falling apart and crying again. It broke me.
I didn't know what to do, except hold her and tell her everything was going to be okay, even though I wasn't so sure.
I would watch her during feedings and how she seemed distant from our baby, looking away, never making that mother to baby eye contact I read about in the "What to Expect When Your Wife is Expanding" book Jolly bought me for my first "father's day". She was physically there, but not mentally.
Days after our daughter turned a month old, I came home to find her sitting on the couch in the living room, staring into nothing. She had the most distant spaced out look on her face, her eyes completely void of anything.
"Baby, are you alright?" I gently shook her. She finally snapped out of whatever daze she was in, shaking her head.
"Noah," smiling weakly at me.
"Baby, I'm really worried about you. You're not looking or acting like yourself," I finally admitted to her.
"I feel okay," she said weakly.
"When was the last time you ate?" I brushed some loose hair out of her eyes, running my hand down her cheek.
She thought for a moment then shrugged.
"Come on, I sighed, taking her hand and pulling her towards the kitchen. That's when the baby monitor went off, signaling our little girl was awake.
"Why don't you go get her, and I'll make us something to eat." My wife shook her head.
"No, you get her. She wants her daddy."
Letting go of my hand she made her way into the kitchen, leaving me in a bit of shock. I thought this was the worst of it, but I didn't know how much worse it could get.
Sex was out of the question. Not just for the first six weeks of course, but even past that. She closed herself off to me, not wanting me to touch her or be around her. It got to the point that she was sleeping on the couch and whenever I came into the room she would leave. I didn't understand any of it.
I eventually had to stay home from the studio and recording with the guys, having everyone bring everything to my house because I was too scared to leave her and the baby alone. Something was off with my wife, and I couldn't figure it out. I was taking it personally, thinking that the end of us had come and what was meant to be the happiest time in our lives was now becoming the hardest and most hurtful. I was done. I couldn't go through with it anymore.
One night, after our little one fell asleep after her feeding, my wife laid her in her bassinet then turned to leave the room.
"Don't leave. Please. Just stay with me for a minute," I asked, trying not to sound too desperate.
She turned and looked at me with tears in her eyes.
All the color was gone from her beautiful face, her complexion dull. Her hair, normally shiny and in her wavy ponytail, was unkept, piled high on the top of her head in a messy bun. Her sleep clothes were the same ones she'd worn for almost a week.
This was nothing but a shell of my wife and it killed me seeing her this way.
"Come sit with me, baby, please," patting the bed next to me. At first she hesitated, but then, surprisingly, she came and partially sat on the bed.
I tucked her hair behind her ear, smiling at her when she looked at me so sadly. I leaned in to kiss her, slowly so as to not startle her, and felt relieved when she kissed me back. Her hands found the back of my neck, twisting the longer pieces of hair at the nape of it. Her touch sent shivers down my spine. I was longing for her in ways I didn't even realize.
"I miss you," I confessed, placing my forehead to hers and holding her head between my hands.
"I know," she sniffed and I wiped away the tears that slid down her cheeks with the pads of my thumbs.
"I miss you, too, Noah."
"Then talk to me," I whispered, "tell me what you're feeling. Even if you can't make sense out of it. Just tell me anyway. I'll listen."
And she did.
I ran a hot bubble bath and for the first time in months I held my wife's beautiful naked body against mine, listening as she told me everything she had been going through.
I washed her hair, scrubbed her back, and helped her shave her legs, and in return, she gave me the best sex I'd had in a while.
Watching her face as she came on my cock buried up inside her made me cum, the feeling taking us both to a higher place we hadn't been in a while. It was euphoric.
Once out of the bath and fully dressed, she checked on our little angel still fast asleep, and for the first time since we brought her home, I watched the brightest, sweetest smile grace my wife's face as she looked down on her. It made my heart swell with joy.
We discovered that night, after some slight research that what she was experiencing was called postpartum depression.
It's something most new mother's get, some more extreme than others. We weren't throwing all our eggs into the basket of self diagnosis, but she promised to call her doctor the next morning and schedule an appointment.
Seven months old. Time flies when you're having fun. I watched my wife as she attempted to feed our angel sweet potatoes for the first time. Surprisingly, she liked them. A quarter of the jar later and we had a happy, sleepy little baby.
I cleaned her up and handed her to mama as she willingly and lovingly took her and cradled her just the way she liked it. With some warm milk, a soft blanket, and mama's arms, our little girl was out like a light.
My wife looked up at me, smiling brightly. She was herself again and there was no better feeling than to see her return. With a mild medication and a little therapy, postpartum depression slowly made its way out of our lives, restoring to me the woman I loved.
She apologized, over and over, time and time again, but I always reminded her there was nothing to apologize for. None of it was ever her fault.
"Thank you for sticking it out with me, Noah. Thank you for not running away."
I took her hand and kissed it, rubbing her growing belly carrying baby Davis number two. Now that we knew what to mostly expect, this little gem would be easier to handle.
"For better or for worse, Princess. You've got me and them, forever."
#noah sebastian#noah sebastian fanfiction#bad omens#bad omens cult#bad omens band#bad omens fanfiction
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[Demon King Red AU belongs to @purble-turble] (Lore ramble incoming below)
Okay so... This idea kept circling around in my head and I finally decided to draw it.
Before the question on Lady Bone Demon on the DKR AU, I was always curious on what could've happened if she was ever released.
... At least I'm glad she wasn't. Because if she was then it would've horrifically backfired very quickly.
Taking place mid-season 2 in the timeline, Lady Bone Demon is eventually released by Spider Queen due to discovering the digging site. One thing led to another, she got the key, and released her. Cue the og possessed DBK fight being replaced with a possessed spider queen fight.
This would last for the finale of season one and the opening season two special in terms of time. Once that crashes, LBD retreats into Bai He, infiltrating King Red's council as assistance to return his darling to him.
Now, her main goal at the moment is to grow strong enough to destroy her biggest threats. She assumed King Red wouldn't be a problem.
She was so, so wrong.
King Red was unlike anything she was expecting. Arrogant, paranoid, obsessive, and extremely intelligent. She couldn't even sneak around without cameras glaring her down. Not to mention her and Macaque getting increasingly aggressive with each other over "this bastard put me into this mess" (aka Macaque sided with Red for, one; Wukong and two; to avoid LBD's deal. And LBD for needing to go through the trouble of getting released (even if it was by chance) and jumping between bodies in an attempt to find her perfect match) type of dynamic.
But once LBD regained enough of her power and helped Red "achieve" his destiny of getting his darling MK back, she turns on him.
As the two fight, she begins to take in some of his power, growing stronger by the sheer fierceness of the fire. Her form stabilized rapidly and just as she was able to physically remain out of Bai He's body, the two strike at the same time...
Causing a cataclysmic soul fusion. Macaque rushes to rescue Bai He and brings her out of harms way, hiding from the smoldering figure.
There's no more King or Lady. A new being remained.
And they were even worse than anyone could've anticipated.
So yeah... Mini plot aside on this hypothetical they can control both fire and ice. Though the fire is now blue and the ice is extremely cold. They're two extremes fighting for balance with their only anchor being to shape the world into an image they desire.
Although LBD isn't fond of MK, Red absolutely is and that part overpowers hers, making them absolutely obsessing over their love. To the point that once they got him back, he was locked up in a room of nearly impenetrable ice for his safety. The space is well hidden in the fortress that many rescue attempts have failed because of it.
And Macaque, oh Macaque... His plan backfired in the worst way because not only was he now FORCED to work for his new ruler, but also anytime he tried to escape or step out of line he'd get punished severely. With Red's half being okay with using physical force (though preferring technology to subdue) and LBD holding seething anger towards the shadow monkey for abandoning her, you get a recipe for pretty severe physical abuse. Think of broken bones, frostbite and second degree burns.
And then you got everyone else, who were all forced to evacuate lest they get swallowed up by the raging blue fires and ice spikes taking over the city. After all, you gotta destroy everything to start over, right?
Which leaves us with this turnout: Megapolis and many surrounding lands have become uninhabitable, both MK and Macaque are tortured in the fortress, and there's an extremely powerful soul fusion of two demonic figures with their worst traits amplified and bouncing off of each other.
The Monkie Kids are mainly hiding out wherever possible, most of the time at Flower Fruit Mountain in an attempt to avoid the carnage. Now, their only hope is to find the samadhi fire to vanquish the Lady Bone Demon from King Red... Then, they gotta deal with the other problem.
Not a perfect plan, but it'll hopefully work out, right?
[Edit: Okay I think I'll just call this the Charcoal Bone King AU it's got a nice ring to it anyway]
#digital art#Lmk#lmk au#text post#lmk art#lmk red son#lmk mk#lmk macaque#lmk lady bone demon#lego monkie kid#demon king red#Dark spicynoodles#spicynoodles#🌸mine#Charcoal Bone King
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More about GGG's finale and core plot (that is, BIG SPOILERS BELOW)
One recurring trend is loneliness. King's actions help connect people, and our protagonist continues in her footsteps, but the loneliness of the characters who play antagonists is especially notable.
The God Awards (which I've mentioned before, the whimsy of them made me totally blip over the red flags and implications) mention Inspekta doing everything for them. What would they be without him, Capochin asks?
"Lonely!"
Inspekta gathered the lonely hearts together. Gave them purpose. Gave them a charismatic leader to follow.
Saul is one of the most antagonistic non-Bizzy humans, and a recurring refrain in Milldread is how lonely everyone is. How gatherings are now somehow either discouraged or outright illegal (hmm, wonder whose idea that was). In fact, most of the Milldread citizens only have good or at least compassionate things to say about him.
(Sometimes I feel like the antagonists are shown a little much compassion given the way this plot goes, but it is also important to remember that deprogramming cultists etc. is based around showing compassion and reminding them that the world is not innately hostile to them. And there's only so much a single game can say in the span of a few hours, so, like, I get it.)
In fact, you have to insult Saul twice to progress in Milldread. How do you do this?
One, you get a dog to make a dog noise, and Saul loses it and comes over to harass the dog (and fail).
Two, after this point, he'll say that he "hates that shaggy little man". This is the line you need to give Budd to progress. When he asks for an insult levied at Saul, you can travel the town... and find that everyone has good things to say about him. He's misled, he's actually very sweet, his friends miss him.
It's very telling that the only way to effectively insult Saul to Budd is to use his own words to do it. Even writing this, I realize that this also implies a bit of a persecution complex with Saul - the people around him don't hate him, or even think he's particularly incompetent. They're worried about him. They understand that he's stressed. He was lead astray by a bad element but he snaps out of it (with help) in time to rejoin his community.
And speaking of throwing words back in faces...
Capochin shows a pretty regular skill for recognizing voices when you fling words at him - it's funny, because a lot of people in this game don't, so he's an outlier and that's amusing. In the battle against him, it means you have to work around him - you can't use his own words against him directly.
Instead, you put words in "Inspekta"'s mouth and bring that to Capo.
He shows an awareness, to a level, that this isn't really Inspekta talking. But this realization is a long time coming, and he can't repress it anymore. He can't deny reality when it's thrown in his face, when he's all alone, when nobody wants to work with him anymore. When even his god is only using him, spending more time with the Godpoke, leading him astray.
The Bizzyboys (and Hector; Yugo Limbo said that all of them come from Drain, hence them looking alike(?) ) evoke a very specific type of person, to me: the incel. Or at least, something adjacent. They're all referred to as "he" as Bizzys (I'm of a mind that Bizzyboys are all he/him while Bizzy, as, like, an honorary gender, mostly because it's just a silly idea; though in retrospect it also meshes with the enforced similarity situation). They're all lonely. They've banded together under a mutual purpose, but they don't really support each other.
And when they start to, between Hobbyhoo and BuzzHuzz? When they begin to collaborate, talk about taking a break from all this fash shit "investigating"?
Capochin shuts them down. Hard.
And Patty says he's scared of Capochin, but the other Bizzies say he would never hurt any of them. But when Capochin blows his top, all of them get really timid.
Capochin not getting involved in the violence until there's literally no one else to hide behind is so cliche that it almost just seems like a joke, until I took in the rest of the story.
Playing this game makes me think a lot of Fallout: New Vegas, a game where you can also destroy fascism and avert a cataclysm as a vaquero-themed courier.
One thing that becomes achingly clear in FNV is how the Legion is a cult of personality: it's not just the Legion, it's Caesar's Legion. Legate Lanius is terrifying, yes, but nobody talks about him as a leader so much as a warrior. Once Caesar dies, it seems obvious to me that the entire thing is going to crumple like a house of cards. Caesar didn't leave any backup plans, any true heirs, because the whole thing was his vanity project. There's no point to the Legion without Caesar, and he never once considered that there should be.
Inspekta and the Bizzyboys work very similarly. The whimsy and goofiness of the setting, which we also see in Smile For Me, lead me to miss some major red flags (I am also just. very dense.), which is a known problem in real fascism - the use of cutesy facades to cast absurdity on any claims of propaganda.
Anyways. My point is that the Bizzyboys seem at first to be a group, but are really more underlings in a cult of personality. Everything falls apart when faith in the system - in Capochin, in Inspekta - is lost. And Capochin is the Joshua Graham to Inspekta's Caesar; both of them culpable, both of them seeming in charge, with Capochin primed to take the fall as soon as things go wrong. But he volunteered for that! He wanted to be Inspekta's #1! The right-hand chump! The prime goon! He's getting everything he ever worked for, so don't question the system, Capo, because that's the same as doubting Inspekta. And doubting Inspekta means you're not a good Bizzyboy. Means you're ungrateful. Means that maybe what you have should go to someone who'll appreciate it.
They literally have their names stripped away - and I think the constant belittling and name-withholding of Patty, who genuinely displays real competence and intelligence at points if you pay attention, is a deliberate ploy. You don't want to be like P. You don't want to be a failure. Look at you, earning your letters! You almost have a full name! Not like that loser at the bottom of the barrel. You're a real winner, here.
And you, P? You need to try harder. Look how Alexei has his whole name back for doing hardly anything! How can you fail to get even a single letter back, compared to him? When Patty asks for his name back in Milldread, Capochin mentions solving mysteries - mysteries of "what does Capochin want for lunch", etc. It's silly, but it's also sinister. It's the most overtly self-centered bit of Bizzy lore we get for maybe the whole game. Capochin outright says he comes first and we laugh because of the delivery.
(The videos are fantastic, because they really set up the reveal in a lot of both subtle and unsubtle ways. Even the very first video, where Capochin insults Patty for asking a scripted question, before moving into the answer, is foreshadowing for the constant emotional abuse all of the Bizzys and Patty in particular are subjected to. There's probably much more I'm forgetting.)
Under the whimsy and humor of the game is a very real statement about cults and fascism and the kinds of people they recruit, and how they do it. They amplify the concerns of the disenfranchised and alone, people who have difficulty connecting with a community. They give those people somewhere to belong, ideals to uphold, and targets to gang up on.
Anyways. Good game.
#elk text#ggg spoilers#bolded for readability i hope#ggg p#bizzyboy p#and all the rest#i am not an expert this is just my personal take#great god grove#im not gonna call this an analysis bc i think that's overselling it but it's... close?
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Belle was only slightly wrong, he really wanted to blitz over there and find this GUN leader and give him a beating. But Surge was right, and belle to, and especially miles. He couldn't let his emotions get the better of him no matter how justified he felt in wanting to hurt them. His mother would be disappointed with him, she'd probably lecture him. You have divine blood sonic, you have to be better sonic, you can't just hurt people sonic--- damn it why not? People deserved it! what did it matter if his dad was a god? fuck that man and the cloud he rides around on!
Belle was Heavy sure but that was sort of unavoidable, and he'd drug knuckles around he was pretty big guy to! his divine heritage gave him lots of advantages and this was just one of them. He just smiled at her as she righted herself and stayed close in case she needed to steady herself.
" Heh--- i guess so, I get pretty sea sick actually. It's why i hate boats, and water... and boats on water... and water mazes... and sewers.. ya know everything water related... "
He also sank like a rock, probably related to his fathers blood, as most gods had a weakness of some kind. Even Demi Gods like he and blaze.
" Yea i figured if i kept to a low gear you'd be better off, besides it wasn't far enough to need cruising speed. Ah Self Improvement--- I don't think that's what they mean... but hey in your case! it totally works! heh! let's get inside and see what's up! I doubt Surge will stay put to long... i know i couldn't ..."
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Altiss checked his chart for Whisper making a few notes and set it back down, she would recover just fine. Though the fur might take time to regrow in a few spots. Still it could have been alot worse, and he didn't feel a need to lecture either of them. They were soldiers this was the sort of thing they had to do, it was there job. Now if they'd just relax and heal up they'd be good.
" Hmm? I wish there was a miracle cure, but no i am afraid this will take time. Though i'm hoping by days end you can at least move and eat on your won. Just take it slow, the last thing you want to do is trip and fall and break something... "
The snake walked back over to Tangle taking her hand and turning it face up in his palms.
" Try moving your fingers... the anti-venom i gave you should be counteracting the poison. By now it should be taking effect, though it could take several hours before you have full mobility back... I'm a Doctor though, not a miracle worker. This is the best i can do... you are lucky, things could have been worse. "
He set her hand down and crossed his arms giving her a serious look of a war time doctor.
" You know all Octopi are venomous... including mobian Octopi... at there most lethal there toxins are 1000 x's more toxic then cyanide. Even if his is half that... well you can see how that would be bad. At any rate i'll keep your family out, as per your request--- though what do you want me to tell them? "
"You say that, though I still felt like if I hadn't stood in your way you'd have just run off to do the same as Surge. Stand there and look all scary." The only difference is Sonic's intentions tended to be more pure, though the Belle knew him decently well at this point. The tinkerer just didn't want to risk it and then the two speedsters starting to go at it in a fist fight or something.
Belle certainly wasn't expecting to be picked up by Sonic, and was sure he'd be in for a surprised as he was a bit heavier than she looked. The tinkerer didn't get a chance to protest the sudden action as the hedgehog suddenly dashed off. It clearly wasn't as fast as he could go, though still pretty fast for her. A moment later she was set down outside the command center.
"Everything has motor skills, they're important part even for robots. You offset that anything will feel sick, it just some have it worse than others." Belle was sure Sonic didn't deal with that issue too often as moving as such high speeds meant it would be harder to make him feel offset and sick. "This wasn't too bad since I've done a few upgrades to myself. If you had ran full speed it'd be a different story."
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"Are you sure there's nothing you can do to speed it up doc? If GUN is knocking then I wanna be able to knock back if I have too." Tangle never had any interaction with GUN herself, though her father always talked about them. Maybe got his brutal parenting style from them too, so that was reason enough not to like them. Though her main reason was for what they've done to Whisper. The lemur would never forgive them for that.
"And before I forget, can you not let my family see me, or just not tell them if you haven't. Trust me, the last thing I need is family drama. I doubt you'd be very happy if an argument broke out between me and them." Not to mention Tangle would be worried Whisper might try to fight them if things got too out of hand. The lemur just couldn't move, though the wolf was covered in some pretty bad burns.
#Blue Streak Speeds By#Sonic#Gears and Starters#Belle#Restoration Medical Staff#Altiss#Locked on Target#Whisper
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u prolly have already but pls i want in depth yap abt caitvi in arc3 and how they heal :)
oh anon i have NOT yapped about how they heal. not in detail at least. so here we go. there's not a lot that hasn't been said about them, but i'd like to put my perspective into the ring just because. as an eldest sister and as a lesbian i can relate to vi in a lot of ways.
i think my main takeaway for caitvi in act 3 is how they're both human, in the ways they love and in the ways they fight. arcane is a show that respects its audience and trusts us to be able to read between the lines and i appreciate how you can see every little detail of the words they're not saying if you look close enough.
in The Scene especially you can see just how real theyre being... im not gonna dwell on it, but by the skin of my teeth and the bones in my knees they LOVE each other. you can see it so clearly.
caitlyn walks in on vi questioning everything she is. violet legit just let her sister slip from her fingers, again. i cannot tell you how many times i've felt guilty when my sister or brother are hurt or do something wrong, even if i had no part in it. i cannot imagine how much it would hurt to lose them and keep going only because of the possibility of finding them again, and then when i finally do find then they're ripped from my arms. and it happens more than once. i would be in the same place vi is. blaming herself for all of it. making the burden of protecting her sister all hers and no one else's. wondering whether or not she's doing the right thing at all. (cough coughh petra minecraft is that you)
as stressful as they can be sometimes they're my siblings and i'd do anytning for them. and with the kind of person vi is, for her that means punching whoever's in the way. doing whatever she can. she has a big heart and she's never lost it.
after caitlyn basically dumped her in the most entitled way possible vi had nothing left. no one to protect and nothing to fight for. so she fought just for the sake of fighting. after getting her family back and losing them again (holy ballsockets she was put through the wringer) all she had was cait even if cait hurt her. i think even if cait never did anytbing to make it up to her, she would have stayed, because vi needs an anchor.
caitlyn's hurt a lot of people directly or indirectly. she grew up priveleged and stayed that way, never truly seeing exactly how much pain people are going through until it's too late to turn back. caitlyn's arc is a very interesting one because she never says the words "i'm sorry". she never tells vi that what she did was wrong and that she wants to fix it. but she does things that prove her remorse.
caitlyn works with vi in the end of act 2. i think this is partially because she was already skeptical of ambessa from the start, and partially because she wanted to find a way to make it up to her. caitlyn doesn't fold as soon as vi calls her cupcake, that's not what the look is. The Look is her thinking, "wait, does she not hate me? why did she call me her term of endearment even after everything i've done?"
in act 3, caitlyn takes all the guards out of the prison, because she knew vi would try to rescue her sister. in the words of another post i forgot to save (deepest apologies to the op of that one), vi could have taken jinx and ran. caitlyn might have never seen her again and she let that happen anyway. and cait even went to the cell to check to see if her theory was true, and lo and behold it was. and vi failed at trying to save her sister. again.
what does caitlyn do? she tells vi that she relieved the prison of the guards because of her. all confident and sultry and commanding like she knows what she's doing.
and then when they're getting into it caitlyn frantically pulls away. she realizes that, yeah, she still needs to make things right. she tries to be honest, tell vi that she saw someone else, and vi just reassures her and keeps going. i think thisnis because 1) vi wants the cupcake, who wouldn't, and 2) she's... not exactly forgiving, that needs more work- but she's showing her appreciation for caitlyn here. caitlyn did something huge for her, she let her break a prisoner out which could have dire consequences for both of them.
i think vi just absolutely smothering cait is also a way to show that even though cait hurt her physically as well as emotionally, she's gone past that. if vi hadn't at least given some thought about cait's actions she would not let this happen, i don't think, unless she's super desperate. this proves that vi is starting to move on and cait is starting to revert back to that sputtering stuttering pinned-to-a-wall-flustered woman she was in season one- that's the woman vi fell in love with, after all... and that woman is battered and bruised and has plenty of sins to stone for. but that woman is not dead.
The Scene in the cell is both them being desperate and them showing their love for each other without words. caitlyn's hand lingers on vi's injury, maybe about to utter an apology, but vi cuts her off anyway. there's SO many little things here gaughehgjf.
and in the end of the show, when caitlyn looks into the hexgates in her family's archives, she looks because vi probably asked her to. vi wanted to be sure. she looked because she cares about vi. whether or not she'll tell vi about this is an interesting thought- i don't think she would. it would undermine jinx's sacrifice.
jinx walked away so she could move on. so piltover could move on. so zaun could move on. so vi could move on. and caitlyn telling vi that she's alive would ruin the steps they've taken towards healing.
i think vi's main problem was dedicating her life to her sister and nothing else. and caitlyn's was just her exploiting a broken system and mever recognizing her faults. vi starts to heal because now that her sister is truly gone to her, she can move away from the past and build her own future. and now that caitlyn's fully realized her mistakes she can take steps towards changing piltover for the better. GAHH i love complicated sapphics especially when there's sapphic joy after all the suffering....
this was all written in one sitting so apologies if it's messy, and i've sort of compiled some other ideas and theories i've seen in here too; but yeah, these are my thoughts on caitvi in season 2. i think they could've been fleshed out a bit more, but overall their relationship is legendary. i'll never stop loving them. caitvi supremacy people 💪
#arcane#arcane s2#arcane season two#arcane season 2#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane rants#arcane analysis#caitlyn kiramman#caitlyn arcane#caitlyn#vi arcane#vi#jinx arcane#jinx#caitvi#caitlyn x vi#vi x caitlyn#waffles word wall
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Oï!!
First, I want to say, I love this comic and genuinely can’t wait to see what awaits for us next ♡♡♡
The premise is such an interesting concept– And the art is to die for, hello?? (all my ♡ to you guys, and I mean ALL of you!)
I just had two tiny questions, if it haven’t been already answered:
If it doesn’t spoil anything, is Sonic still going to be able to run at his full speed with that mechanical leg? Or is he going to be limited? I can’t imagine my poor baby stuck with average speed, but I’m not really sure that this leg is capable of supporting his sonic speed.
And second, mostly adressed to others fans... WHY IS EVERYBODY BLAMING MAH BOI TAILS FOR EVERYTHING?? Like, yeah sure he’s technically responsible but–
Why is nobody blaming Knuckles too?!
Both Sonic and Amy told Tails to come back to the ARK and let Sonic&Shadow handle things, and I think we can safely say he would have (even reluctantly) obeyed and gone back to the ship.
But noooooo, Knuckles had to chime him and told him to make himself useful.
Useful.
To the boy who literally just witnessed his BigBroTM (fake) death in an explosion without being able to do anything abt it.
The kid who just had an entire arc abt gaining confidence and learning to step out of Sonic’s shadow (pun not intented), to be his own person with his own purpose and all that jazz.
The child who’s probably still pump up on the adrealine from his fight with Eggman (which he won if I remember my SA2 correctly).
Knuckles, mah bro, best hot-headed himbo of the franchise. You could not have chosen a worst time to utter these words.
Of course Tails was going to take him up on that and try to ”MaKe HiMsElf UsEfUl”, why wouldn’t he?? He defeated Eggman in battle (Left-over adrealine and possibly cockiness?), and didn’t seem to trust Shadow with Sonic (who, again, was thought Dead literaly less than half an hour ago bc of the Team Shadow was on– Seriously, I can see why he’d like to be by his side when Sonic is again risking his life out there for them)
And franckly, how was he supposed to realize how bad his intervention would turn out to be? It never got that bad before, why now?
#StoptheTailshate #HoldKnucklesaccountable
Sorry for the rambling and the terrible english, but it had to be said, bruh. Tails ain’t even in my Top-5 favorites character, but everyones’ so harsh on the baby, he needed some backup 🥺😭
Hii @sookilini here answering as per usual!
this is the best ask we have ever received and it's honestly my favorite, thank you so much for sending this.
I always get to excited and emotional when i read these things, thank you so much for your kind words <333
ALSO THANK YOU FOR NOT ATTACKING TAILS, he has been DRAGGED TO FILTH I CAN´T TAKE IT /j
So first: is Sonic still going to be able to run at his full speed with that mechanical leg? Or is he going to be limited?
Unfortunately, the people of Marmolim (the planet he landed on) as you may have been able to tell, don't know who Sonic is and are unaware of his speed and abilities. So, the prosthetic leg isn´t capable of withstanding his speed...
Secondly
Why is nobody blaming Knuckles too?
I honestly have no idea why most people commenting did not catch onto Knuckles provoking Tails by poking at his insecurities, I'd even dare to say his ego more so... Tails got into his head "oh I don't need Sonic to get things done. I can do anything, I'm more than just the brains, I can do the action too" at least this is my intention with his actions.
We have to remember, Tails is literally just a child at the end of the day, yes he is incredibly smart but can you really expect a 12-year-old-ish kid to act rationally when put in a stressful life or death situation while getting yelled at by everyone for just trying to help?
Nobody would ever expect a kid to even be in that situation to begin with right? at least that´s what I think.
We all know Knux isn´t the smartest in hindsight...he isn't stupid by any means, but he will say what comes to his mind without second guessing for sure.
But oh well...Knuckles isn´t here to defend himself....anymore...
But there is still hope
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Kem's non-spoilery/non-plot-related impressions on Veilguard:
Now that I finished a first run, I want to just put some thoughts out there - basically likes/dislikes sort of thing. So here we go! In no particular order:
Likes:
This is very subjective of course, but to me it just FEELS like Dragon Age. It's nostalgic in the vibes and mechanics while also being fresh.
Hair physics!! Me gleefully watching my boy's ponytail flipping around like 'yessss gooood'. Every game needs this imo xD
Companions: While I'm personally not going feral over any of them, I do LIKE them all, which is unusual for me. I love the shouted encouragement in combat, and how they move around the Lighthouse and have little snippets of conversations with each other (wish we got MORE of this).
I adore the environments and maps. I love exploring new places in Thedas, they're all so gorgeously detailed, and I love the LAYERS of them. The exploration feels very Assassin's Creed, which is fun for me. Docktown is my favourite I think, but Arlathan and the Crossroads are also stunning.
I'm a sucker for the elven relic puzzles, they make me happy!
Combat: It took a while for me to adjust, particularly coming from BG3 where I had time to deliberate my decisions. But once I got into the rhythm of it, I now find Veilguard combat quite fun. (I played as a sword and shield warrior this first run, I'm excited to see what a mage feels like next time around)
PHOTOMODE!!! At least a third of my playtime has definitely been spent taking screenshots. It has almost everything I want - camera angles, depth of field, field of view. SO MANY SCREENSHOTS! (1800 at last count)
Dislikes:
Save system. Generous auto-saves are great, but I hate how you get bumped to the nearest beacon when you load in, rather than where you actually left off. Also I'm a save scummer so 100 manual saves is not enough lol.
Main menu being the only functional 'pause' button is irritating, especially when trying to get into photomode.
Armour/outfit stuff. I'm sorry but most of the designs are terrible. TERRIBLE. Also there's no dye/tint system, at least Inquisition had SOMETHING to that effect.
Pacing. I feel like the stories in the game had so many good notes, but it felt.... disjointed, like it was just hitting the main beats rather than creating a cohesive narrative flow. Across the board, it felt rushed and shallow in that respect. Also (and maybe this is just a me thing) it felt really difficult to get a handle on the passage of time throughout the game.
Ambivalent: The character creator. Lots of great sliders and options, but also I kinda hate the 'mash three heads together' thing, and I don't know why we need 50 styles of eyelashes instead of, I dunno, more hair options? (also - body hair. Needs body hair)
I may add to this as more thoughts occur, but for now that's what I've got. Overall impression - positive! I had a great time and I'll be replaying for sure.
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*sigh* thoughts on Nintendo's botw/totk timeline shenanigans and tomfoolery?
tbh. my maybe-unpopular opinion is that the timeline is only important when a game's place on the timeline seriously informs the way their narrative progresses. the problem is that before botw we almost NEVER got games where it didn't matter. it matters for skyward sword because it's the beginning, and it matters for tp/ww/alttp (and their respective sequels) because the choices the hero of time makes explicitly inform the narrative of those games in one way or another. it matters which timeline we're in for those games because these cycles we're seeing are close enough to oot's cycle that they're still feeling the effects of his choices. botw, however, takes place at minimum 10 thousand years after oot, so its place on the timeline actually functionally means nothing. botw is completely divorced from the hero of time & his story, so what he does is a nonissue in the context of botw link and zelda's story. thus, which timeline botw happens in is a nonissue. honestly I kind of liked the idea that it happened in all of them. i think there's a cool idea of inevitability that can be played with there. but the point is that the timeline exists to enhance and fill in the lore of games that need it, and botw/totk don't really need it because the devs finally realized they could make a game without the hero of time in it.
#i really do have a love-hate relationship with this timeline#because it's FASCINATING lore. genuinely. and i think it carries over the themes of certain games REALLY well#but i also think it's indicative of a trend in loz's writing that has REALLY annoyed me for a long time#which is this intense need to cling to oot#and on a certain level i get it. that was your most successful game probably ever. and it was an AMAZING game.#and i think there's definitely some corporate profit maximization tied up in this too--oot was an insane commercial success therefore you'r#not allowed to make new games we need you to just remake oot forever and ever#and that really annoys me because it makes certain games feel disjointed at best and barely-coherent at worst.#i think the best zelda games on the market are the ones where the devs were allowed to really push what they were working with#oot. majora. botw. hell i'd even put minish cap in there#these are games that don't quite follow what was the standard zelda gameplay at their time of release. they were experimental in some way#whether that be with graphics or puzzle mechanics or open-world or the gameplay premise in its entirety. there's something NEW there#and because the devs of those games were given that level of freedom the gameplay really enforces the narrative. everything feels complete#and designed to work together. as opposed to gameplay that feels disjointed or fights against story beats. you know??#so I think that the willingness to allow botw and totk to exist independently from the timeline is good at the very least from a developmen#standpoint because it implies a willingness to. stop making shitty oot remakes and let developers do something interesting.#and yes i do very much fear that the next 20 years of zelda will be shitty BOTW remakes now#in which botw link appears and undergoes the most insane character assassination youve ever seen in your life#but im trying to be optimistic here. if botw/totk can exist outside the timeline then we may no longer be stuck in the remake death loop#and i'm taking eow as a good sign (so far) that we're out of the death loop!! because that game looks NOTHING like botw or oot.#fingers crossed!!#anyway sorry for the game dev rant but tldr timeline good except when it's bad#asks#zelda analysis
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I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc
#damian wayne#damian al ghul#damian al ghul wayne#batman#batfamily#for all of the issues that come with having Steph as your fave having too much wild shit happening at once is never one of them#btw I quite like The Boy Wonder Issue 1. wow shocker an artist and writer who I have liked everything they've ever done#has once again written something that I am enjoying with art that makes me want to be part of its world.#it's almost like Juni Ba is really freaking talented or something#like I have some problems with it but it seems like many of those are part of the point. Damian is learning that his siblings are more#three-dimensional than he realized and that is part of this 'coming of age' story merged with fairytale#so I can't be mad at the oversimplistic defining of Dick and Jason and Tim until the conclusion of the series. that might be the point.#I hope that the series will address Steph as a Robin but if not then frankly it's not an issue unique to this series.#I'll be annoyed and disappointed but ultimately roll with it like I am with Babsgirl being here. There's too much good stuff here to get#hung up on shit that seems to be almost an editorial mandate at this point. at least that's where I'm at.#I am also very sorry that Chip Zdarsky is massacring your boy. he has 'X (Tim for him) is the best Robin so everyone else must suck' diseas#where a writer really likes one specific Robin and in trying to uplift them demeans all of the other Robins. instead of like...just writing#for that one character only or alternatively not demeaning the other characters in order to make his blorbo look good#it's wild because I actually think his writing for Tim is pretty solid. but he's not writing a Tim series. he's writing a Batman series.#and if you are going to write a Batman series and include other Batfamily members you need to actually write them well.#instead of assigning them like 2 personality traits while Tim gets to be a whole character#I accept that behavior in fanfic where I have lesser standards because it's fucking free. not a comic run that wants me to pay#tens of dollars in order to understand what the fuck is going on. he's been going for a while now it's gotta be a lot of money.#I can buy Steelworks with that money. I can see John Henry and Natasha Irons in a trade. Fuck you Chip.#it's why it takes such a special person to write a good ensemble story/a good Batfamily story. you have to be good at writing a LOT#of different characters. which I don't think most people are. I sure as hell am not. I can write maybe 3 at a time confidently well.#and you also have to give all of them at least SOME love or else people will be upset that you aren't focusing on their fave#and also the writing as a whole will suffer. Chip Zdarsky is a pretty good Tim writer. I'd maybe read a Tim solo written by him.#I would not read a story focusing on multiple characters that I like written by Chip Zdarsky. because every character who isn't Tim#is at least a bit weak/inconsistent/out of character INCLUDING FUCKING BATMAN. THE NO. 1 GUY MOST ARE HERE FOR
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richard's relationship with money is so interesting to me despite/because of how vague and nonspecific it is in canon. which only makes sense because the show isn't interested in richard's backstory at ALL and, it being an audio medium, it can't exactly give many context clues like wardrobe/style or what his apartment/house looks like. but it's like......... he doesn't have interests, he dabbles in money-making activities. i am practically forced to assume that his mention of being good at pool also = a side hustle. his estranged dad up and left him a house and a paid ride to college. at this point he's way better off than he's ever been -- after 18 years of living with two separate conmen and a mother who doesn't care about him in mediocre apartments, he's suddenly on his own with his future out in front of him, and....... he STILL takes very risky grade-changing jobs for money? like he bypasses getting a regular college job and goes straight to petty crime? and apparently "far worse" crimes??? it's such an interesting balance between craving the security of Having Money and being pathologically unable to get it in a "normal" "safe" way. he doesn't even do anything with it in canon, he just GETS it. he isn't even buying lucy's drinks himself!!!! obviously even richard has bills to pay (which is. very funny to me. sorry that i think 19-year-old college era richard is the funniest person to ever exist, gremlin who's only ever lived in an apartment with his mother, sister, and mother's rotating cast of boyfriends, suddenly has a whole ass house dumped in his lap on his 18th birthday in exchange for his whole ass father's wholesale abandonment of him, has to figure out how to pay utility bills on his own, maybe thinks about getting a barista job or whatever kids did in the 80s, record shop clerk job?? and then nopes past it and picks "exploiting a child genius" as a career path instead. what a fucking legend. i also think he murdered people for money a couple times but that's just me) sorry i've lost the plot of this post thinking about campbell county community college computers richard. imagine being the people at the 5 Cs in charge of hiring STUDENT COUNSELORS and seeing richard maxwell strut into his interview and thinking "yes this 18-year-old suspiciously home-owning kid who talks like a john hughes movie antagonist and is currently his kid sister's very much illegal guardian is the perfect fit for our emotionally and socially fragile 11-year-old resident genius. what could go wrong" and then they have to pay for nicholas adamsworth's therapy sessions for the next 5 years because richard maxwell was what could go wrong. fuck. "waylaid in the windy city" maybe be my personal favorite richard but pre- and mid-"eugene's dilemma" richard is definitely the weirdest and funniest
#richard maxwell#aio#richard goes home deliriously exhausted from his college classes and 14 illegal side hustles and has to help rachael with her math homework#'why does he talk Like That' because it was the 80s and he's a single father next question#no wonder he genuinely likes lucy she's a Good Kid who doesn't need him she just likes him#despite everything that's probably the most straightforward relationship he has#unfortunately on lucy's end she also requires several years of therapy after her category 5 richard maxwell moment#like EVERYTHING about eugene's dilemma richard makes simultaneously more and less sense#when you realize that he's got the background radiation of 'my estranged mom showed up out of the blue to make me take care of her/my siste#'and then she left me alone with my sister and no way to contact her if i needed help'#'and then my sister got taken away from me because she got busted for shoplifting several times in a row so now i'm alone again'#'i canonically hate myself for failing her this way'#'also someone almost kidnapped me in a creeper van the other day'#the fact that fotf created the Most Character of All Time without meaning to or realizing is so fucking infuriating to me#at the very least richard maxwell should have been a supernatural character. he could have shone there.#instead. here we are.
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Am I getting old or the constant need from certain groups to make every morally questionable/utter piece of shit character some uwu soft boi with issues is getting really fucking annoying
#i mean#it could be both#not gonna say what this is about and i've never really posted about it in this blog#but one of my favorite things something i've loved dearly for at least 24 years give or take because that's as far as i can remember#was uwu-fied by an adaptation and by this hellsite and i HATE IT#i feel like they need to make a piece of shit more palatable sometimes like my dude#my dude you wouldn't last one second playing gta 5 as trevor philips for example#dude is nasty dirty disgusting a piece of shit has trauma yes but all he does cancels out everything at most we get some context#but the guy is pure shit! and we love him for it he's so much fun as a FICTIONAL little dude that doesn't have to be the#pinnacle of morality or some bullshit#it's funny how this hellsite takes content for teens and up#something crass and violent and needs to uwu-it#but makes the darkest goriest most utterly depressing aus about children's shows#anyway#long time i didn't vent here i'm just tired of the dni for utter bullshit like...if you only like the uwu adaptation use the block button#that's what is there for
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i haven't been this social & talkative in Years someone drag me out back
#rambling to myself in the tags just go ahead n pass by 🫡#u've been warned#i can feel the burnout(?) creeping up on me & its been. two days.#at least my friend is reassured i'm still in their life every few months 👍#even if i end up hating being dragged out places i know a little relief feels like a lot to other ppl#but i also just. hate being involved at all. esp if its pity but also when they genuinely want to talk with me. which sucks!#i hate thinking like that. however it just feels like the most logical path sometimes yk? after (gestures vaguely) everything?#i'm childishly obsessed with the aspect of destruction. me or them carrying it out it doesn't matter#any sort of socializing feels like grinding stone together whether or not their intentions seem as pure as possible#it feels like my socializing button is broken and my battery is locked at 2% 24/7#its not that i actively try to keep myself locked in self serving cycles to stay pitiful lord knows i hate being pathetic#i despise being miserable. it may not be Everything i know. it may be comfortable or familiar or whatever edgy shit#but it takes so much energy to have any emotion. i feel like i wrung myself dry in elementary school#ultimately i know i'm capable of Having Emotions. they're just all buried beneath 78 layers of static that don't seem to be there for other#i try to be social. even when i know Deep down i like them i end up hating every interaction. no matter how smooth or funny or whatever#i seem to have this blanket that makes everything heavier on me. i don't like being weighed down but sometimes i have to comply else#i know i'll just fucking crash out for the next however many years & end up being more hurt than i began with#<- metaphor doesn't make sense bc i ditched it half way thru but you get the point#be social to the complete detriment to my health & appease others or hurt other ppl (something i don't like doing bc i know how it feels) &#end up ''''saving'''' myself (trapping myself further. lose/lose). i wish i was completely exempt to people paying attention to me#i Hate wallowing in this fucking pity. this whole woe is me evvybody huwt me so now i feel nudding :( schtick makes me feel so weak#i like feeling strong by socializing. sometimes i get this litttlee inkling of maybe i should try & put myself out there More but it always#comes with the same results. one of these days surely it'll change (<- bearer of the curse) (<- but still has hope despite denying it)#yes i'm in therapy yes i'm working on my social capacity slowly instead of getting my boundaries ran over at top notch speed by my abusers#sometimes i need to say the self pitying shit out loud to knock me to my senses & be like 'if a friend said this i'd criticize them'#'if anybody else thought that you'd cringe so hard and be filled with That Specific Misery you feel & hate so much' ohhh right. my bad
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And maybe you'll be like "but if you don't trust businesses, how can you trust welfare?"
I fucking don't. My mom trying to get on food stamps fucked me up because a lady I never met without my permission got my SSN from my mom and started editing my files. My heart still races to this very second whenever I think about it, it kinda messed me up bad and I'll never ever ever see any kind of recourse
And I'm terrified that I'm gonna lose my medicaid just cause I inherited some money from my grandpa
And I've never even applied for disability cause it kinda doesn't matter finding out if I'd qualify or not cause of my depression, when the rules are so restrictive I don't know if I've even be allowed to keep my house
I do not fucking trust these things on a personal level. I feel like out of a lot of people I have the most to fear from them cause I'm on the edge of having things work, and that gets you punished
...but I need medicaid in order to have insurance (and when you strip out the finance side of medicaid, I love medicaid... they're honestly incredible insurance... I just... I just... dental is like 90% of why medicaid is so important to me, ever since I found out this state pays for it I've actually been able to do cleanings which is important to me cause I can't always get myself to brush)
And I think things like disability and food stamps are pretty damn important on a personal level, and honestly are also good for the economy cause they get people spending... it's practically a free cash infusion into the economy, cause these are people who need to buy stuff
There's just so much important stuff welfare does that it's worth dealing with government
No, what I want is more accountability so if someone gets my SSN from a 3rd party like my mom they're held to HIPPA styles standards where that's not ok to access my files without my permission (She changed my fucking address and tried to get medicaid to investigate me for fraud! Never even met me)
Like have some accountability there and in every situation
Secondly I want less punitive focused rules. I'd frankly prefer bezos get on disability than smack down some poor sod cause they got $2000 in the bank or cause their friend lets them live with them for free
If there's gonna be a cut off on these programs, it needs to be a solid step above the poverty line, cause... by definition I assume poverty line denotes kinda the minimum expected income people can reasonably live off of, and if you take away benefits people are gonna lose a chunk of money to covering that stuff themself, so you need a buffer before you kick people off
I don't fucking trust the government for a second, I've actively been fucked by them and on a personal level I avoid everything but medicaid and only that cause everything but the money is pleasant to deal with and I kinda need it (honestly if I was rich I'm not even kidding that I'd rather give medicaid like $400 a month than some insurance company, I sincerely like them as insurance)
But I'd trust them a lot more if they were less punitive, less out to hunt me down and gut me cause someone handed me a fiver or cause I started to get on my feet, and if government employees had concrete rules they had to follow that were actually transparent and enforced
Like 90% of my problems with welfare go away if they're held accountable and there's less "catch the welfare cheats" mentality going around
I don't trust the government in the slightest, but sadly there some jobs it kinda has to do, so I'd just rather force it to be an open book where the public can keep an eye on it and if they step out of line there's consequences (sort of like I don't trust most mega corps but happen to sometimes need stuff from them... did you know literally every cell service provider has been illegally selling shit like your location data to random people like bounty hunters, and the FCC just slapped them with a fine that's 0.02% of their yearly incomes and debated even doing that? I even can offer a source on that)
...I don't trust much of any authority cause they constantly fail me and kinda screw me. Don't trust doctors either, but I still gotta go to them, you know? ...they're just... they're real bad at listening... so many systems need systemic change
(You know who I really don't trust is the cops. I could point to so many examples. My uncle doesn't trust cops either, and he's an ex Fire and SWAT paramedic, he worked with them and we still got into a long conversation where he basically tore into them far better than I can)
(I don't trust authority that's not accountable)
#anyway; if I'm a lousy cheat or whatever least they can do is give me a gun so I can solve that problem#shit makes me wish I was canadian so I could take advantage of their sick implementation of assisted suicide#what should be a system that gives people a choice about the quality of their life; and I don't think should be relegated to terminal illne#...there was... think he was dutch; had been burned by his girlfriend all over his body; was in constant pain#and he ended up using assisted suicide in the end cause he was just in constant agony... think that's his choice to make#but of course the canadian system concretely pushes people; mostly the poor and disabled; to kill themselves#not theoretically; as in literally says word for word to them 'you should really kill yourself; just sign here'#it's sick; it truly is#but for any americans that want to dunk on it; I'm telling you we're no better#we have the exact same miserable desperation and people (again; mostly poor and disabled) into despair#only difference is we don't offer assisted suicide#the underlying issues in the US and canada are so damn similar; so much of what's happening ends up being the same#you can't act smug just cause you only make people want to die instead of also offering to help#that's like saying that you're the good guy cause while you did everything you could to drive someone to the brink#get them fired; slash their tires; just cartoon level villain stuff to personally harass this person... at least you won't hand them rope#we have such similar systemic issues to canada; and I am explicitly telling you that like the people in canada that have said#'I can't take it anymore; disability doesn't cover my expenses and I can't get any help... I'm at my wits end so I'm gonna go die'#I'm telling you that I feel that same way; just without any eugenics agency I can call up#I'm really working to get things stable; but it feels like I'm teetering on the edge of falling into permanent failure#and... and I'll actually tell you the amount even though I don't like to mention money... makes me feel guilty#my gramps left me $27k; which sounds like a lot; but I got 20 windows that need redoing (house has a lot of windows)#...if they ended up being 1k each; that's most of the money gone; if they end up being more...#and I got a whole lotta other stuff I've been putting off like plumbing around here; need to replace that faucet#it's an amount of money that helps; but it's an amount of money that isn't gonna last#...that's like a year of bills; and my mom already needs me to pay like $400 to the propane bill since she got behind#I want to use it to... to try and really get my feet on the ground; but it might loose me my insurance... it makes me want to die#and not to be a selfish bastard; but if I could I'd like to try and take and invest a bit to maybe build some passive income#given that... that a job never seems to work out for me cause I fucking suck and cause like... my insomnia has me up at 5:30 am right now#mm tag so i can find things later
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