#that i kind of like. well. everything i'd like to write is something i've already written

[lord-squiggletits]

For the author ask: #12 & #23?

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you?

Very early in this fandom, I actually thought that I was only ever going to write PNP interfacing and would never write sticky because it didn't make sense, or at least if I did, it'd just be in PWPs and nonserious stuff, never in a plot fic. 😂😂 Can you imagine? Honestly, a lot of the "tropes" I used to dislike (or not understand the appeal of) but now like are kinda kink-related, but that's a little off-topic so maybe...

Honestly, I'm struggling to think of tropes whether for Transformers specifically or for my writing in general. I don't know that I really have an answer for this one...

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to?

I have an "Adaptus-Pharma survives the finale of LL" AU as well as a "Pharma gets away with the plague at Delphi" AU that I've already talked about or mentioned on here, so I'll try to think of something else.

Thanks to some discussion on the Pharma server, I've felt some itches to write another survival/resource scarcity fic in the lane of For Once, Nothing is Burning. Technically, FONIB was meant to satisfy that survival fic itch, but I've always felt like I could do way more with it. For one, FONIB is on a very small scale of just two people, and for two, as grim as the situation is, I don't think the MegOP situation there is super dire (or maybe I just underestimate how scary it is since I'm the author and know what happens).

Would like to try it particularly in a wartime context where 90% of tactics revolve around logistics. In IDW1 we even have canonical plot events like Skorponok blowing up the last energon refinery on Cybertron (Monstrosity) and Cybertron being permanently destroyed by the war (Stormbringer), even Shockwave predicting an energon shortage pre-war, but canon never really does anything with that. We're told that there's resource shortages, but nothing ever is really shown with it.

Then again, I'm not sure I'll do anything along those lines any time soon considering an author I like is already doing a survival oriented Tarnma fic series (mind the tags) and another one I like is currently planning one. And idk, something about that particular kind of horror/angst (yknow cannibalism, starvation, dying of preventable illnesses, slow death of the species) is really depressing to me, so I think I'll just let those authors/friends take care of it. I have enough angst on my plate as is lmao.

Oh, I also have a Shattered Glass Pharma idea that's just sort of sitting in my head as a concept that exists and I haven't done anything with bc my interest in SG is very selective (Pay Unto Evil-verse) or I just haven't found an appealing way to spin all of IDW1 into a mirror universe (I read the SG series done by IDW-- not the older one by FunPub-- but didn't care for it much).

[neil-gaiman]

hi neil. i've held off on writing this message for a bit because i didn't know if i could get it out or not.

i work in a senior healthcare facility. not a nurse or anything, i actually just serve food to the residents, but it's given me the ability to get to know a lot of the people that live there. because of this, i was able to befriend a wonderful lady named sally. she would always come talk to me while i served up the meals, and we'd have nice chats. she spent most of her time reading books, since she didn't like to do many of the activities with the other residents, and since she loved books with mystery and suspense, i loaned her my copy of american gods, thinking that she'd enjoy it. and she did! i loved it when she'd come talk to me about the chapter she'd just read, our little chats about wednesday, just everything. i was happy that she liked the book.

our chats kind of tapered off after awhile, and we didn't talk as much. she's had my book for well over a year now, which i hadn't minded, but she eventually started picking up our chats again, about the book. but she was talking about how she had just started reading it and that she was really interested in it so far. i came to realize some time later that sally was actually just finally showing signs of dementia, which was saddening for me to hear, but it's one of the heavy realities of working in a facility like this. she had always struggled with some memory and speech issues, but i'd always chalked it up to her older age.

anyway. i am saddened by this onset, but at the same time, i am also finding some strange comfort in knowing that she will come up to me at breakfast, wanting to talk to me about american gods, because she's forgotten that she's already read most of it, and she just reads the first few chapters over and over. she doesn't leave her room without it, she brings it to the table with her every day. when she leaves the facility with her family for an outing, she brings it with her. i am just. so comforted knowing that your book i loaned her a year ago is a source of joy and delight for her, and continues to be so over and over. i know i'll never get that book back, and i won't ever try to get it back from her, even if she stops reading it. i want her to keep it.

i now have a streak regarding losing my books that you've written, i'm two for two now, haha

idk. i'm just really kind of overwhelmed today by all the emotions surrounding it and i'm just happy that you wrote something that she likes so much, and that we talk about it even though she doesn't remember that we've talked about it a dozen times before. i love each and every chat with her so much, and i want to keep having them with her for as long as i can. thank you for your work.

Some of the happiest hours of my life were spent with a friend with advanced Parkinson's dementia, sitting on his porch with him, both of us reading. And he read the same few pages over and over and it was okay.

[the-modern-typewriter]

Love your writing! Can I request a hero that likes being controlled by the villain because they get relief from their anxiety/stressful life but they are denying it because they don’t want to admit to being overwhelmed?

"Oh god, you're back."

The villain smirked at that particular greeting and inclined their head in acknowledgement. "Long time no see, hero mine."

Anticipation had the hero's heart drumming double time. They shifted their weight, hold tightening on the battered strap of their rucksack. The street was empty, all curtains conspicuously drawn, but there was nothing actually blocking any exits. They could run. They weren't far from home. They might even make it.

"It's okay," the villain said, tucking their hands into their pockets. "You can try, I won't be offended. I know you prefer pretending that you don't like this. That you don't crave this."

"I don't."

"No?" The villain's tone was soft, but their eyes gleamed in the glow of the lampposts. Their gaze was somewhere between gently mocking and not so gently fond. "You're lucky you lie so pretty. It means I'll let you off with a warning. Just the one, because I've heard you've had a rough week."

The hero swallowed.

The week had been exhausting. Atlas would have buckled beneath the weight of the last week too. Anyone would. Wouldn't they? Maybe that was why, beneath the panic of seeing the villain again, there was a much more terrifying chasm of relief. Dizzy, desperate relief. The kind of longing that left a person brained by it. Dumb.

"You heard about that?" the hero asked, in a small voice, even if it was entirely not the point.

"I'm here, aren't I?"

The hero shuddered, to hear the villain say it so bluntly. Maybe if they hadn't, the hero could pretend - what? That somewhere along the way monstrosity and miracle had blurred together like wet watercolours?

"You could walk away," the hero said.

"I could," the villain agreed, placidly. They didn't move though.

"Would you if I asked you to?"

The villain's head tilted, considering the hero at that.

"Mm, I don't think so," they decided eventually. "Then you'd feel like you had to ask. It goes better when you don't have any choice in this matter, doesn't it?"

"You can't just - you can't say that."

"No?" the villain's lip curled up again. They closed the gap between them, casually confident. "You asked."

"Well, yes - but." The hero didn't have a good way to finish the sentence. Mainly because they should have been horrified. They were horrified! It was only..."You're not supposed to say it." The crack in their voice felt far too much like confession. "It's not right."

"Yeah. I'd say you should stop feeling so guilty about liking it so much, but honestly it's entirely too delicious watching you squirm."

The hero made a choked, incoherent sound in their throat. They took a step back, not remotely surprised when the villain's hand snaked eel-fast around their back.

"Ah, ah," the villain said. "You already had your chance to run. Go easy."

The hero felt the very moment that something switched in the villain's voice, their powers humming a siren song in the hero's bones. They felt their body turn to putty as they blinked at the villain, wide-eyed. Their hands settled comfortably on the villain's chest, not pushing back.

It wasn't...it wasn't exactly that their brain switched off, only that everything in them suddenly refused to fully recognise the danger. And there was danger, they knew that, but...

But for the first time since they'd last seen the villain, the knot in their chest loosened. They didn't feel one small straw or loud noise or well-meaning question away from bursting pitifully into tears.

"Good," the villain murmured. "Just like that. There you are. Deep breaths."

Up close, the villain took a moment to study them properly. The hero let them look. Minutes ago, they might have tried to hide, ashamed by the blatant dark circles under their eyes, by everything that the villain would see, but in that second...

The villain's lips thinned a fraction. "I've been away on business for too long, haven't I? Sorry about that."

"How was business?"

The villain didn't bother answering that question, more concerned with grazing their thumb along the swell of the hero's lip where they'd bitten it raw. Their eyes darkened further.

"You look annoyed," the hero said.

"You could have called me, you know."

"Why would I do that?"

"Why would you-" For a second, it seemed like the villain might say something. Then, they simply sighed, and shook their head, muttering something under their breath. They pivoted, so they were at the hero's side instead, snagging the hero's heavy bag onto their own shoulders.

"Walk." The command hummed through the villain's voice again. "I think we've both had enough of your idiot brain for today. You're done for the week."

Every time the villain let them go, it was harder to force themselves to leave.

[ohcorny]

so! it's been a year since i put never satisfied on hiatus, and 9 years since i started posting it, and rather than make you read everything if all you want to know is "when's it coming back?" the answer is still: don't know! but the answer has also shifted closer to "it isn't" the longer i've spent on break, and i think it's worth being up front about that.

i talked about it a little here a few weeks ago, but the long and short of it is that between taking on better paying work, writing better stories, and looking back at what i'd already done for never satisfied... i just don't think i want to continue it? the year off has been incredibly good for my mental health, and i can't see myself wanting to go back after the two-three years still ahead of me on my current project. that's not to say i never want to return to the characters or the concept, but if i did, i imagine it would be with something completely new, in a different form. after all, i started this comic when i was 21 years old, a lesbian, and a sophomore in college. i am now just shy of 30, a bi man, and overall a completely different person than i was, back when i was writing without a plan and putting all of my insecurities into the comic--insecurities i don't identify with anymore. lord i'm closer to rothart's age than i am to lucy's. hate that

anyway. you have all been extraordinarily kind for following never satisfied for as long as you have, for supporting it as much as you have, and being as patient as you have. whatever form never satisfied takes in the future (god willing, with a more cohesive story structure and A PLAN FOR THE ENDING, WHICH BY THE WAY I NEVER, EVER HAD) i hope to see you there!

in the meantime, as an update on where i'm at with the thing that made me stop working on NS: i finished it! all the pages for Hunger's Bite (if you remember it with a different title: no you don't) have been turned in and now it's just revisions and covers and then........ waiting a year until it can come out. because that's how it is in traditionally published graphic novels! nothing releases for a full year after you finished it! and you're even getting it earlier than was originally planned, because i'm a creature and finished it like three months ahead of schedule. i've also already started thumbnailing the sequel book which i can't talk about whatsoever and will now be working on that for the next two years and then HOPEFULLY the first book will have done well enough that i can sell a third! so you better buy it when it comes out next february!!!!!!

to ease you all into it, i wanted to do a little crossover to introduce the main characters. we have emery, whose design is fully and unintentionally just Seiji Again down to his color palette (but seiji would bully him if they met. like so hard. he's a wimp). then we have neeta, a girl who dreams of travel and cares deeply about worker's rights, and wick, a vampire agent investigating the mysterious and sinister new owner of the 1910s ocean liner emery and neeta call home. he's also gay. but sorry lucy, you aren't his type. you're not mean enough.

the best place to keep up with me these days is probably here, as this first book gets closer to release, i will probably be posting about it a lot. and i will certainly post about it here when there's an official release date and cover reveal! i hope you'll go read it. i really think if you liked never satisfied and its themes, you'll like hunger's bite!

thank you again for reading!!

[suzukiblu]

. . . anyway LISTEN I told 'yall November was gonna be "obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon AU" month, and I really did not INTEND to post my daily words for it again this year but also, like, fuck it, we ball. No promises I will update EVERY day this time around but again: fuck it, we ball. ( also uhhhhh I've been writing this fic kinda-sorta-semi out of order lately but there is still a significant chunk of word count I'd already written that I would've pre-gamed and posted YESTERDAY if I'd thought I was gonna be doing this, sooooo hope nobody minds us kickin' off the month with like an extra 5.9k on top of the 1.6k of obligatory sugar that I ACTUALLY wrote today behind this here cut? yes? no?? Bueller???? )

get sugared, Super-boytoy. Tim, you just . . . you just do your future-supervillain best over there, buddy. you just do what you can with yourself. prev: (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“I wanted to,” Tim says again, and Kon glances away and bites his lip, turning the flowers by the stem again. 

“It’s, uh–pretty,” he says, then clears his throat. “I mean, it’s–cool. Thanks.” 

“If I can’t bring you fresh ones, well . . .” Tim shrugs. Kon glances back to him, and very briefly presses one of the orchid blooms against his own mouth. His face is still all flushed and his eyes are still a little soft, and it’s . . . it makes a picture, alright, even if it's not one Tim's specifically set up to take. Especially with the gold eyeliner and his blue eyes both matching the orchids. 

Tim didn't plan that, obviously, but he thinks it makes up for the sapphire versus ruby thing.

“Um . . .” Kon trails off, biting his lip. Glances down at the orchids from under his lashes. It doesn't make him any less of a picture, for sure. “So, um–do you wanna see the ‘something nice’ I got?” 

Tim blinks, immediately thinks of the most embarrassing option that Kon could possibly mean, and desperately tries to fight back a mortified flush at the idea. But, well–everything he can see Kon wearing is something he remembers buying him already, so . . . 

Oh god, he needs his brain to shut up right now. Immediately. Right now and immediately and forever. 

“Sure,” he says like a normal person, trying not to panic. “What is it?” 

Kon, thank god, pulls a little rectangular package inexplicably–and inexpertly–wrapped in newspaper comics out of the same coat pocket he tucked the jewelry box in. There's plain white string tied around it in a bow. 

Tim . . . blinks. 

If he didn't know better, he'd think Kon had . . . 

“I, um, got you something?” Kon says, and Tim stares blankly at the package. He–what? “For once, anyway. Well, I guess, uh, technically you got it for yourself, and actually this is kinda stupid maybe, you can literally just get yourself whatever you want whenever, obviously, but I just thought, uh–” 

“You got me something?” Tim repeats in surprise. Kon turns pink and shoves the package at him. Tim is too bewildered not to take it. 

“I thought it’d be, uh–fun,” he says, biting his lip and still very visibly blushing. “I mean–that we could have some fun with it. Y’know?” 

Tim stares at the package for another moment, then looks up at Kon. Alright, this maybe isn’t exactly the vibe he was going for here in terms of who’s paying for what and who’s giving things to who, but . . . well, Kon apparently used his allowance for whatever this is, at least, which gives him a reason to have wanted the allowance, so . . . he can work with that, he figures. Like, it’s an “in” to work from; a step in the process. 

He can’t tell what Kon’s gotten him from the shape of the package, though the edges are hard even though it doesn’t feel like it’s in a box or anything. “Have some fun” isn’t much of a clue, though he supposes it does imply something interactive. Maybe it’s a game of some kind, or–

Tim unties the bow and splits apart the clumsy seam of the comic-page wrapping paper with his thumb, tugging through its layers to reveal the package’s contents, and Kon flushes a little darker and watches him just a little bit nervously. 

Tim doesn’t actually know what to say. 

“I just thought, um, a real one’d probably take better pictures than a phone can,” Kon says sheepishly, slanting his eyes away and half-hiding his face behind the orchids. “I made sure the battery was charged and the guy at the store said it's got a lot of storage, I guess, so . . .” 

“You got me a camera,” Tim says blankly, which is the most bewildering possible thing that Kon could have gotten him short of, like . . . no, it’s pretty much just the most bewildering possible thing that Kon could have gotten him. By far it’s the most bewildering possible thing that Kon could have gotten him. 

“You like taking pictures, right?” Kon fidgets a little, then smiles just barely shyly as he glances back at him. Tim's heart skips a few beats. Or more than just “a few”, maybe. “So, um–I thought maybe we could go do that . . . somewhere. You know, after dinner.” 

“Oh,” Tim says, blinking at him a little stupidly. It’s not a particularly good camera, honestly–like, it’s a perfectly functional model for casual amateur use and a decently reliable commercial brand, but he’s got much better ones that are all professional-quality. He hasn’t used any of them in a while and most of them are admittedly a few years old now, but . . . yeah, this was a hundred bucks max, if that, and his cheapest camera was over five hundred. 

Note to self: raise Kon’s allowance. 

Also, apparently now his favorite camera is the kind of camera civilian amateurs just take random family photos on. Apparently that’s a thing. 

Tim really doesn’t know how to feel about the fact that Kon not only remembered something he mentioned having an interest in, Kon bothered to actually get him something he thought he’d have an interest in. That is really, really not the dynamic he’s been encouraging here, for one thing. And also, why even would Kon do that? Like–really? 

“Thanks,” Tim says sincerely, turning the camera over in his hands and feeling incredibly embarrassed about all of this. “I love it.” 

“Cool,” Kon says, biting his lip around a smile. His face is still a little pink and he looks all soft and pretty like that, especially with the flowers still in his hand. Tim really was not prepared for Kon having “soft and pretty” in his repertoire. Like, that was not a thing he ever expected to see from his cocky, crowing brawler of a teammate. 

Kon’s only a brawler because he thinks he’s supposed to be, though, Tim’s pretty sure. Like–increasingly sure, at this point. 

He really, really needs to figure out how to get Kon to tell Robin more about his TTK. Or, like . . . anything about it, apparently. Just literally any single thing, at this point. 

“Thank you,” he says again, inspecting the camera assessingly and making note of all its functions and ports and the generally obvious basics. “We could go take some shots around downtown later, if you’re up for that?” 

Kon turns bright red, and Tim doesn’t understand for about half a second before remembering–the last time Kon had talked to him about taking pictures, he’d offered . . . 

Oh Jesus. 

Tim is either incredibly stupid or–actually, he doesn’t even know. Lucky? Embarrassing? The dumbest moron alive who didn’t even realize he was being flirted with again? All those things and several even worse ones? 

Kon had offered to let him take spicy pics of him the last time they'd talked about taking pictures, whatever “spicy” means to Kon–brash, impulsive, shameless Kon–and Tim’s the idiot whose first thought upon Kon following up that conversation by very literally giving him a camera was to go take pictures of fucking downtown.

He is the most useless “sugar daddy” to ever sugar. 

Well, to be fair, it is Gotham downtown, so it’s very–

“I like taking pictures of streets and buildings,” he blurts belatedly, fumbling to sound like just the oblivious idiot that he is and not some kind of weird fucking perv who’s trying to get Kon arrested for public indecency. Jesus, he’s stupid. “And people-watching is interesting too. You know, stuff like that.” 

“Oh,” Kon says, and looks several ways at once, including both a little relieved and a little disheartened, which . . . okay, Tim would literally die if they actually went somewhere to take spicy pics tonight, so is unfortunately unavoidable. He’s not trying to make Kon not feel–attractive or anything, but he needs at least twenty-four hours to make a plan and also two or three or seventeen contingency plans before . . . anything like that happens. Ever. Even in theory. “Um–yeah, sure. That sounds cool.” 

“Cool,” Tim says, still desperately pretending to be an idiot. It’s not hard, on account of the fact that he very much is an idiot. 

Kon pauses for a moment, then perks up a little, seeming to think of something, and asks–“When’s dinner?” 

“Our reservation’s in forty-five minutes,” Tim says, double-checking the time on his phone just to be sure. “Well, forty-six. I figured that’d let us take our time walking over and maybe we could window-shop a little on the way.” 

And also shop-shop a lot, if Kon gives him literally even the slightest indication that he wants or needs something. Just if it comes up or anything. That’s all. 

Tim definitely did plan their route to the restaurant to cut straight through the middle of the downtown shopping district, either way. 

“We could’ve just met there, dude,” Kon says wryly, but grins anyway, glancing down at the orchids in his hand again. “Forty-six minutes, huh?” 

“Yeah,” Tim confirms. 

“And you like taking pictures of streets and buildings?” Kon asks, his grin turning just a little bit sly. Tim frowns briefly in confusion, not sure what the grin’s about. 

“Yeah,” he says. “Gotham has a lot of really interesting architecture and design. Like, it’s an old city, and one that’s been pretty resistant to updates in a lot of areas or just not had the money for those updates. So you get a lot of places with a lot of character and it’s basically the bastard child of gothic and art deco design with a side of industrial warehouse, depending on the part of town you’re in. Like, Crime Alley and the Diamond District have very different vibes, but they’re both very Gotham vibes, if you know what to look for. It’s–” 

Kon is grinning really widely at him, for some reason. Tim realizes he’s rambling like a moron and turns red. 

“Uh,” he says, repressing a wince. “Yes. Yeah. I like taking pictures of streets and buildings.” 

“Cool,” Kon says, and then he carefully packs the orchids back into their box and it back into the gift bag and transfers the chocolates and jewelry back into it too, then grins even wider at him as he hooks the bag’s handles over his arm and into the crook of his elbow. “Don’t drop the camera, babe.” 

“Wha–” Tim starts to say, and then Kon grabs him by the arm and pulls him into the closest alley, which is terrible survival instincts for Gotham, oh god, but before Tim can say anything about that Kon’s wrapped an arm around his waist just tight enough to just barely lift him off his feet and bolted straight up into the air with him. “Shit!”

Tim doesn’t drop the camera because he’s held onto cameras while falling off literal buildings before, but definitely only because of that. Muscle memory, or whatever. Also he’s been snatched off his feet by Bruce and Dick plenty of times and thrown off rooftops by multiple rogues and thugs over the years and these days gets regularly dragged around by Bart, all while holding very important things he could not afford to drop, so it’s not like either the sudden jolt or the effort to keep his grip on the camera are as disorienting as it otherwise would be. Just . . . 

Ugh, Tim realizes, absolutely unimpressed with himself upon realizing that the breathless feeling he’s having right now is not actually related to the swift and sudden increase in altitude, but is actually just because it’s Kon holding him. 

He is an idiot, isn’t he, he reflects resignedly. Just an actual literal idiot. 

Jesus. 

“Whatcha think?” Kon asks with a grin as he comes to a stop in mid-air with him. He stops very suddenly, but Tim notices a distinct lack of jarring with said stop, which implies Kon’s got his TTK around him again and probably completely around him, which means–

Oh god, Tim thinks, and very quickly makes himself stop thinking about that. 

“It’s cool,” he says, because a normal civilian would think flying was something interesting and unusual, but it’s hard to act too excited about a move Kon probably pulls on literally everyone he–

“I meant the view, babe!” Kon says with a laugh, and Tim . . . blinks. 

And then he looks down. 

They’re hovering a few thousand feet up, and downtown is already lit up bright in the early evening gloom. And Kon . . . 

“Streets and buildings, as ordered,” Kon says, grinning wider with a smug, cocky look on his face. 

Oh no, he’s hot, Tim realizes with dread, and then blinks again. Stares down at the city below, past the whipping wind and down into the busy streets and the bright, dazzling lights cutting through the murky gloom. He’s seen Gotham like this a thousand times, obviously, because of course he has–he’s been climbing these rooftops for years, and every night he runs across and swings back and forth between them and utterly fails to learn how to do more than a double backflip. 

One day, he promises himself distractedly, and then looks back at Kon. 

He’s seen Gotham like this a thousand times, but never just because someone thought he’d like it. Like–not like this, he means. Dick's shown him a few particularly special or exhilarating views over the years, yeah, but . . . definitely not like this. Not for a reason like this. 

And definitely not while peacocking all smug and pretty dressed up in clothes that he bought him and holding him close enough to kiss. 

Kon’s expression turns a little sheepish; a little soft. Not quite shy, but . . . 

“Do you like it?” he asks, his voice pitched a little quieter, and Tim has the much worse and even more dread-inducing realization of oh no, he’s CUTE.

He swallows, briefly, and feels his face burn. 

“Yeah,” he manages in an almost-normal voice. “I like it.” 

Kon grins at him, brighter than any city light, and Tim barely keeps himself from dropping the camera after all. 

“Thanks,” he attempts awkwardly, making himself focus on the camera and resisting the urge to take an immediate shot of that city-light grin. 

Then he takes one anyway, because of course he does. Kon laughs in surprise, then makes a face at him teasingly. 

“Hey, you can buy this face in any cheap gossip rag, focus on the fun stuff,” he jokes, jerking his head towards the city below. Tim looks searchingly at him for a moment, and then for obvious reasons snaps another picture. Kon flushes a little again. They probably won't even come out from this close, but . . . 

“You’re the most fun I’ve had all week,” Tim says, which is definitely too honest but clearly necessary to make a point of saying. Kon turns redder, ducking his head and grinning around his bitten lip. 

“You don’t have to say that kind of thing to me, man,” he says, and it comes across almost like a reflex. Tim hates . . . yeah, just literally everybody Kon’s ever known in his whole entire life, actually? Like, pretty much everybody? Bart gets a break because he grew up alone in VR and is therefore terrible with people and the girls get a break because they haven’t known any of them that long, but everybody else can just take a long walk off a short gutter, in Tim’s opinion. 

Especially any “everybody” from Cadmus. 

Or Metropolis, at this point. 

“I’m not saying anything I don’t want to say,” he says simply, and goes to the effort to frame a few shots of the skyline so Kon will know he appreciates . . . well, not the angle, exactly, but the thought. 

Technically he is usually on top of a building when he’s doing this, so the angle is actually a slightly different one than he’s used to–not that he’s been taking photos lately, just–not the point, really. Kon got him a camera and brought him up here because he clearly thought he’d like it, and damned if Tim is gonna do anything to make him think he doesn’t. 

He has better cameras for things like this–aerial shots and night photography and long-distance and the like, and better cameras for closeup candids too–but he already knows these pictures are all going to be exactly what he wants them to be, even the ones that don't come out. 

Or especially those, maybe. 

He's not sure how he'd explain that feeling to someone else. 

Kon flies them around, staying out of sight behind the light pollution and among the shadows of the buildings, and Tim takes . . . a lot more pictures than he needs to, actually. He was just trying to make sure Kon knew he appreciated him thinking of him, but actually . . . 

Well. 

It’s fun, that’s all. 

It’s . . . been a while, kinda, since he got to spend this much time on just photography and nothing else. Or–any time at all, really. 

Not that this is nothing else, obviously, given that Kon’s holding him and it is very, very hard to concentrate on anything besides that, but it is the kind of a view a standard civilian never gets, and it’s kind of nice to be flying for non-work-related reasons, for once. Like . . . novel, he guesses. A different experience. 

Technically he and Dick do “fly” together just for fun, sometimes, but that’s different. Like–so many kinds of different. It helps them in their work–keeps the rooftops familiar and them both in shape and in sync–but he can’t take photos when he’s trying to keep up with Nightwing across the rooftops of Gotham, and it’s not like Dick’s carrying him either. 

Also, it’s much less flustering and difficult to concentrate through, because again, Dick is not carrying him, and also Dick doesn’t do things like wear clothes he bought or do his eyeliner and paint his nails for him. Or, uh . . . anything like that. 

Also, definitely the “spicy pics” thing is not at all a thing, with Dick. Like, not even slightly, in any way whatsoever. And they’ve also never made out in a changing room or the back of a planetarium or– 

Look, there’s a lot of ways it’s different, okay? 

A lot of ways. 

“I'm not boring you, am I?” Tim asks a little bit sheepishly as Kon lands them on a ledge just behind one of the bigger gargoyles, tucked in tight in the shadows between it and the building it's perched on. “We can probably still fit in some window-shopping before dinner, if you want.” 

“Oh my god, dude, I promise we can do things you don't have to spend money on,” Kon says with a laugh as he lets him down on the ledge. “Though if it helps you technically did spend money on this, given how I got the camera and all.” 

“It's your allowance,” Tim says, because he wants to make sure Kon actually gets that. “You can spend it however you want.” 

“Well, I spent it how I wanted,” Kon says, and then steps closer into his space with a smile. Tim ends up sitting on the gargoyle’s back as Kon leans down to kiss him, and it's not like he's never kissed anyone while perched on a gargoyle before, but somehow it feels like something new anyway. New and electric, bright and easy and smeared with the city lights and thrilling in its shadows, and– 

Kon breaks off the kiss, though he keeps a hand on Tim’s arm, probably to make sure the squishy untrained civilian won't accidentally fall off the ledge and get splatted on the concrete. Tim barely holds himself back from chasing his mouth. 

“It's cool, anyway. Um, doing stuff you're into with you, I mean,” Kon says, looking a little soft and almost-shy again, and never mind, Tim not only needs to chase his mouth, he needs to set up a damn manhunt for it. “You're real cute when you get excited, man. I mean, uh–just–” 

The manhunt is going to require a very significant budget, Tim notes. 

Then he kisses him again, obviously. Kon melts down into it–into him, really–and wraps his arms around his neck, and Tim feels several kind of ways about it. Admittedly, it's the easier option with him sitting on the gargoyle and Kon leaning over him, but Kon's put his arms around his neck a couple of times now, and, well . . . 

That's just not something he would've expected from him, he guesses. Not “cool” or masculine or badass or . . . whatever, exactly, Kon thinks he's supposed to be. 

So Tim . . . likes it, he thinks, that Kon doesn't seem to think he needs to be like that around Tim Drake. 

Robin’s sure as hell never seen Kon in eyeliner. 

Robin's loss, Tim thinks. 

. . . maybe he's compartmentalizing a little too much these days, but still. 

Kon makes a very, very soft little sound between their mouths and then laughs, and Tim promises himself he won't stop at Gotham: he'll take over Metropolis for this asshole one day. Even if that means putting up with Lex Luthor and Superman. And also, like . . . everything about Metropolis. 

He'll figure it out. Supervillainy is still a long-term plan, so he's got time. 

Anyway, if he gives it to Kon after he takes it over he won't have to put up with it, so it's whatever. Sugar daddies do that kind of thing, right? Get their sugar-ees a city? 

. . . okay, definitely not. Like, very definitely not. 

“Okay date idea, then?” Kon asks as he leans back a bit and does a very bad job of biting back a smile, his face a little flushed and arms squeezing a little tighter around his neck. 

Tim will get him Metropolis if it kills Lex Luthor. 

“Very okay,” he says, smiling back at him. Kon grins, his face turning just a little bit redder, and then kisses him again. Tim has absolutely no complaints about that. Ever. He can’t even imagine a complaint he’d have about that, in fact. 

Worst case scenario, he’ll get them in at another restaurant if they miss their reservation. 

He really doesn't know what else he's supposed to do about how easy Kon blushes. 

They definitely spend too long making out against the gargoyle and Tim definitely lets himself get too riled up during it–and does not think about tactile telekinesis or any kind of related passive perception while he does–but by the time he’s the one pressing Kon back against the building, he really doesn’t care anymore. 

The fact Kon is even willing to let him do that when there is literally no way Tim could ever actually pin him anywhere without a way to sabotage his powers is . . . really, really distracting. Just–so distracting. 

Jesus, Tim thinks, breaking off just long enough to catch his breath for a moment. Kon pants softly against his mouth, which sabotages that even worse than kryptonite would sabotage TTK. 

Jesus, Tim thinks again, and then crushes their mouths back together. 

He doesn’t need to breathe that often. 

Kon makes a softer, breathier sound this time, and Tim does not let himself make it weird by letting his hands wander anywhere outside of second base territory. Frankly he’s not sure second base territory isn’t him making it weird, but Kon started it, so hopefully it’s not? Like–logically it’d follow that Kon wouldn’t touch him anywhere he doesn’t want touched, right? 

Well–hopefully, anyway. 

The air feels tight, Tim notices suddenly, like the feeling of sinking into deeper pressure when underwater but all at once, and then realizes–oh. 

Uh. 

Okay. 

“Um,” he says, and immediately the feeling of pressure vanishes as Kon jerks back and claps a hand over his own mouth. Which is mostly him pushing Tim back, given their position, but he does crack the brickwork behind him a little. 

Whoops, Tim thinks. 

“Sorry!” Kon blurts. “Sorry, sorry, that’s–sorry! I just, uh–got a little too into it. I won’t do it again.” 

“It’s really not a problem,” Tim says, with absolutely no idea how to take the idea of Kon getting “a little too into it” when kissing him, or the idea that getting a little too into it apparently involves getting wrapped up in TTK a lot more noticeably than making him bulletproof at the museum did. “I mean–it didn’t hurt or anything, I was just surprised.” 

“I–yeah, I know, it’s just–weird,” Kon says, still looking mortified. “So–sorry. That’s all.” 

“I don’t mind weird,” Tim says, because actually the idea of being temporarily at least as invulnerable as Kon is while making out with him implies being able to devote a lot more attention to said making out, as opposed to keeping half an eye out for snipers or rogues or random rooftop criminals. Not that he’d stop paying any attention to that, obviously, just–yeah. Well. 

It’s a little tempting, that’s all. 

“Uh–you don’t?” Kon bites his lip, still looking a little embarrassed. 

“It kind of just felt like scuba-diving, but with less equipment involved,” Tim says with a little shrug, keeping his tone light because “seriously, you have no idea how much I’d like to not be compulsively keeping an eye out for snipers right now” isn’t a very “civilian” thing to say. “And I’m not about to complain about you enjoying kissing me that much either way.” 

“Oh,” Kon says, and flushes a little. “Uh–really?” 

“Really,” Tim says, smiling at him again and tugging gently at the lapels of his jacket to pull himself back in. Kon blushes, and grins, and meets him halfway for the kiss. The sensation of pressure wraps him up again, gentle but undeniable, and Tim feels several kinds of ways about it. 

Maybe even a little bit safe, or at least as safe as anyplace outside the Batcave ever gets. 

Tim knows there’s no such thing as being perfectly, completely safe, but getting all wrapped up in Kon’s TTK and kissed for it makes it hard to remember that. 

Very, very hard. 

They spend a much longer time making out this time. Tim is vaguely aware that they still have a dinner reservation to make, but . . . well, he did pad the time to allow for window-shopping, so even with the time they spent flying around taking pictures, it's probably fine? 

Yeah, no, they’ve definitely missed their reservation by now. Probably way past missed it. Just so, so far past missed it. 

Weirdly, Tim doesn’t care as much as he should, even though he really prefers when things go to plan and also needs Kon to feel appreciated and like he got properly spoiled and taken someplace nice. He’s going to have to figure out something else on the fly, though, because he really does needs Kon to feel appreciated and also needs the excuse to get him more used to getting money spent on him and–

Tim remembers that he needs to breathe more than he's currently breathing and breaks off the kiss. Kon half-chases his mouth with his own, audibly breathless himself. Tim is not equipped to handle Kon breathless. 

That might actually be more flattering than the TTK thing. Or, uh–flustering, maybe. 

Both, maybe. “Both” is probably accurate here. 

Jesus, Tim does not know what he did to deserve Kon getting breathless over something he’s done to him, much less all soft and pretty and–

They have definitely, definitely missed their reservation. Usually Tim has a better sense of time than that, but usually Tim doesn’t have Kon wanting to make out on a Gotham rooftop with him, Like, he thinks he can forgive himself a little bit of disorientation on that one, considering. 

. . . as long as Bruce never finds out he messed up that bad, anyway. Because Bruce would definitely not like hearing he’d messed up that bad, TTK or not. 

Probably especially involving the TTK, actually. Probably Bruce would not take “yeah I let Superboy get distracted enough to unconsciously wrap me up in his Kryptonian-level superpowers while he wasn’t in full control of them and actually, like, encouraged it, kinda? like, explicitly encouraged it, actually”. 

Yeah, Bruce would not like that. 

“Um,” Tim says, and clears his throat a little awkwardly. “So, uh–hungry yet?” 

“You could say that,” Kon murmurs, then flashes him a sharp, wicked grin with his eyes slit open just enough to fix on Tim’s mouth. Tim spares a moment to compartmentalize just enough to not lose his mind about that, then makes the mistake of licking his lips anxiously, sees Kon’s hooded eyes go hot at the sight, and immediately fails to not lose his mind. 

“Uh,” he manages, and then decides they don’t really need to get dinner just yet and maybe they could just, like–no, no, Kon is definitely not getting enough calories from that stupid barely-legal underground lab’s stupid definitely-not-health-code-compliant cafeteria, Tim is not gonna be a bad enough date to not get his date a respectable amount of calories. That is just not a thing that he’s gonna, like . . . thing, as a thing. Or whatever. 

Not like Superman’s been bringing Kon casseroles or anything, the prick. 

“Um, I–uh, might’ve let us get a little too distracted, sorry,” Tim attempts after a moment of mental fumbling, making himself push back from Kon a little and pulling his phone out to check the time. Yeah, they have definitely missed their reservation. Very, very thoroughly have they missed it. 

Dammit. That is not Bat-quality situational awareness. 

“You think that was just you, man?” Kon asks with a little laugh, just barely ducking his head and biting his lip. It is . . . very distracting. As is his face. And his hands, which are still loosely on Tim’s back, and his TTK, which is still loosely . . . basically everywhere, yeah. Just–way too many places for Tim to be rational about, basically. 

“I mean, I was the one who made the reservation,” he says, clearing his throat awkwardly as he does his best to at least fake rationality. “So, uh, I should’ve been paying attention to the time. I can see if there’s someplace we can still slip in, it’s a little last-minute for a Friday but–” 

Kon kisses him again. 

Tim was saying something, he’s reasonably sure, but he couldn’t remember whatever it was with a gun to his head. A gun to his head while out of his suit and without Kon on the same floor as him, to be clear. 

Kon leans back and grins at him, all bright and pretty and cutting right through the shade and shadows of Gotham like a spotlight-signal lighting up the cloud cover. Tim remains vaguely aware of the fact that he was doing . . . something. At some point. In theory. 

God, Kon is so pretty. So, so pretty. And everything he’s wearing is something Tim bought him, coat and clothes and jewelry and all. Just–all of it, as far as he can see. 

Tim does not let himself think about what else Kon might or might not be wearing right now. Just–that way lies madness, and also Kon not getting a decent dinner and decent spoiling. 

. . . there’s probably some other ways Tim could spoil him, technically, if he just– 

Tim does not finish that thought. 

“You’re so fucking cute, daddy,” Kon says, still grinning just as signal-bright and pretty at him. Tim is not prepared for literally any of that and nearly melts right off the ledge into an incoherent mess of street pizza. 

“Uh,” he says, swallowing roughly. “We should–are you hungry yet?” 

Kon laughs, for some reason. Tim very quietly and carefully burns alive, and then Kon floats up a few inches and ducks around him and back out into the open air, leaning down to grin at him and reaching to–probably he’s intending to pick him up again, Tim’s brain is vaguely aware, but the rest of Tim is thinking more like hurr durr pretty boy, which is definitely why he ends up reaching up to cup Kon’s face in his hands and tug him down for another kiss, pushing himself up on his toes on the edge of the ledge to reach him easier. Kon makes a soft, breathless little noise, then laughs in delight and kisses him back. 

The wind is cold and sharp and the evening sky is all heavy dark clouds and hazy light pollution and Kon’s wearing clothes Tim bought him, some of which Tim even suggested to him, and he put on makeup and painted his nails to come see him and he’s got a gift bag of little things Tim picked out for him hooked in the crook of his elbow and he liked all of those little things, and they’ve not only missed but obliterated their dinner reservation, and they’re half-on a ledge high above the street and kissing and Kon is just so pretty.

And Kon also bought him a camera and brought him up here because he thought he’d like it and called him “cute”, which are all facts that Tim is definitely going to have to compartmentalize to fully process later, or else he really will melt right off the stupid ledge. 

The spicy pics thing, also, is a thing. The spicy pics thing is, uh–very much a thing. 

Tim is maybe just never gonna process that particular fact in, like, self-defense. 

Ever. 

. . . god, he’s going to have to process that fact at some point, isn’t he. God. That is . . . that is a whole thing that he is going to have to do. Like, effectively and well and throughly.

Maybe it’s not too late to just go supervillain right now, actually. Maybe Kon would be open to, like, minionhood or something. Lots of supervillains put their minions up in their lairs, right? That’s totally a thing, isn’t it? 

Ugh, no, Kon deserves a place he can really feel like is his place and also he has not laid near enough groundwork to get Dick to switch sides. Like, Alfred would, obviously. Alfred will be on-board the second the rusty crowbar and shrapnel bomb plan comes up and will probably have useful notes to add. But Dick is gonna require some more long-term finessing and Babs definitely won’t come if Dick doesn’t and– 

Kon laughs into the kiss and cups Tim’s face in return, which is incredibly distracting, and then squishes his face, which is incredibly annoying. 

“Hey!” Tim sputters, and Kon laughs again and leans back just enough to grin at him. 

“You are so weird, dude,” he says. “I can literally hear you thinking.” 

“. . . that’s not me being detached from the situation, I–” Tim starts, unable to repress a wince, and Kon just grins wider, grabs his wrists, and tugs him off the ledge and–oh, okay, that’s a weird sensation, Tim notes, because gravity does absolutely nothing at all to him until Kon’s pulled him into his arms and wrapped him up in them again all easy and secure. . 

So that’s . . . yeah, no, “incredibly distracting” isn’t actually gonna cover this one, considering. 

“Uh,” he says, blinking a couple of times. That. That is definitely not how Superboy holds Robin. 

Frick. 

“I just gotta keep you better attached, right, daddy?” Kon purrs–really purrs, his chest briefly vibrating against Tim’s–and then grins wider at him again with eyes that are, unfortunately, literally goddamn sparkling right now–thanks, gold eyeliner, Tim didn’t need those higher thought processes–before giving him another quick little kiss that Tim actually would like to turn into a four-hour make-out session and maybe also a sleepover and–

God he needs to remember how to compartmentalize. He really, really needs to remember how to compartmentalize. 

Also he needs to kiss Kon’s literal friggin’ brains out, the smug friggin’ asshole.

Mid-air makeouts are the worst possible idea Kon has ever inflicted on him and Tim would sooner fight Killer Croc without his utility belt than point that fact out to him. 

He winds his arms around Kon’s neck and kisses him back, and Kon makes this tiny little–not pleased, not content, but actually happy-sounding noise and kisses back harder. Tim feels gravity stop being a particularly relevant concern again and feels like he’s floating in deep, heavy water but also like he’s the lightest he’s ever been in his life, and it is . . . it is a feeling, alright. 

Kon is a menace. Kon is a problem. 

Kon is so, so damn cute. 

“You are an actual literal brat, baby,” Tim mutters slightly more feelingly than he means to, and Kon’s laugh comes out a little breathier this time and he ducks his head to the side and his face flushes and–

No. Nope. No. Tim needs to not learn anything new about himself or Kon tonight, or, worse, anything about him and Kon. That is just not a thing he has time for in his schedule. He’s got to fit in an anxiety attack and three full files’ worth of casework this weekend, for one, plus his science presentation and that make-up book report, and also come up with someplace else nice enough to take Kon to dinner tonight. 

“So, uh–dinner?” he says very quickly–self-defense, again–and Kon bites his lower lip and grins around it, his face still turned just a little bit away. Tim pretends they’re not effectively pressed together from knee to neck right now. Pretends valiantly. “I mean–um, if you’re hungry yet.” 

Kon laughs, ducking his head lower, the dangling gold teardrop hanging from his ear gleaming warmly in the murky electric city light. Tim goes through multiple stages of emotional processing to keep himself from kissing his neck right behind that earring and completely forgetting about not only dinner, but all his homework and casework and even the anxiety attack. 

Does Kon laugh this much around Robin? 

Tim really doesn’t feel like he does. 

He also doesn’t tell Robin very important things like the fact that he can make other people bulletproof on a whim and map out an entire mall just by standing in it, which is objectively much worse and potentially dangerous a thing not to do, but also Tim is already positive he’s going to miss that laugh like crazy every time he sees Kon with the mask on. 

Robin doesn’t get to see Kon like this at all, even when he lets the asshole eat both stupid boxes of cinnamon bread. 

“Dinner, yeah,” Kon says, grinning again and then taking off backwards across the sky, apparently unconcerned about their chances of hitting a building. Tim’s not really in a proper carry so much as just stretched out against him and wrapped up in his arms, but given the nature of how Kon’s powers work, an actual carry is obivously not really a concern, so . . . 

Oh, Tim realizes as Kon tips back just enough to be reclining in the air, still flying without any apparent care or concern for the aerodynamics of the situation or anything but staying more or less out of view of anyone on the street below. 

Avoiding the street view is good. 

The part where now he’s essentially laying on top of Kon is . . . less good, maybe. 

Maybe he won’t have to convince Kon to go supervillain, at least. Maybe Kon’s already there. 

“Where to, daddy?” Kon asks with a smirk, keeping one arm looped around Tim’s waist and folding the other behind his own head like he’s laying out in a lounge chair on the beach. Tim thinks longingly of smothering him and also of getting him to take down his TTK so he could bite a hickey or five into his neck. Maybe six. He could probably do six. 

Or seven. 

“Northeast towards Broad Street,” Tim says as he tips his head in the appropriate direction, then pulls up the camera again and snaps a quick shot of Kon’s smug smirk, which immediately breaks into a surprised laugh as the other flushes again. 

He takes a picture of that too. 

“You flirtin’ again already, man?” Kon asks with a sheepish little laugh, like the bastard has any room to talk. 

“The position’s pretty good for it, that’s all,” Tim says with a level of casualness he absolutely does not feel. Kon flushes darker and bites his lip again, still just barely grinning. Tim, ethically, has no choice but to take a few more pictures. 

“Oh my god,” Kon says, laughing again and unfolding the arm he has tucked behind his head to hide his eyes behind instead. Tim is maybe a little bit too aware of the line of his throat under the neck of his shirt, without his eyes and the sparkle there to be distracting him into a useless stupid mushbrained might-as-well-be-a-civilian, observationally-speaking. “I’m not a building, you absolute nerd!” 

“I said I liked people-watching too, didn’t I?” Tim points out reasonably, though mostly his brain’s occupied with the question of–“Hey. If you let down your TTK a bit, could a baseline-DNA human give you a hickey? Like, is that physically possible, or are you too Kryptonian for that?” 

“Oh my god,” Kon repeats, laughing harder even as the flush on his face spreads down his neck. Tim wonders how warm that might feel under his mouth. “I, uh–dunno, man. Maybe?” 

Tim silently resolves himself to finding literally any excuse to conduct that experiment and moves a hand to cup the side of Kon’s throat, eyeing it consideringly. Kon makes a slightly weird noise and visibly swallows, and Tim belatedly realizes that he’s paid literally no attention whatsoever to whether or not they’re about to hit a building or a flagpole or a roof this entire flight; he just assumed Kon had it handled. The Bat-paranoia kicks in and he glances up reflexively, and just as reflexively slides the pad of his thumb across Kon’s pulse. Their flight path is clear; they’re high enough to avoid most of the buildings in this area. Definitely still gonna need to keep an eye out for radio towers and billboards, but . . . 

Kon swallows again, the gesture a little bit rough this time. Tim feels the other’s throat flex against his palm. That sure is . . . that sure is a thing that Tim feels right there. That invulnerable throat flexing right there against his palm, and maybe not necessarily having to be invulnerable, if Kon didn’t want it to be. 

. . . . . . he already said he didn’t have time to learn anything new about himself tonight, dammit.

[bbsmuts]

Career Advice ft. Miss A Suzy & AOA Seolhyun

A/N: I have a few notes before I start this one, first and foremost being that I got plenty of DMs after Special Fanmeet telling me the shock play was well done and it was a good addition to the smut, so I'll be incorporating some of that into more smuts in the future. My readers (as well as myself) have made it clear that they're into dom/sub dynamics, ownership kinks, and all that kind of stuff, so I'll be incorporating that a bit more. You're welcome, ya kinky bastards.

Is this very, very late? Yes. Is it very much overdue? Indeed it is. But will it be very good due to how much time I've had it a a draft? Probably also yes. Maybe. I don't have time to proofread things, so I never know.

This is a pitch from @phoenixwolf (who's been quite patient and a pleasure to work with), which is a pretty unique idea I've never seen before. It'll be quite a bit different from all my others, since the main character isn't in any kind of relationship with the idols. I'm doing a bit (well, in some parts a lot) of modification with how being an idol works and the perks that come with it, since to be quite honest I don't really know how it works and I need to make it fit the story better. So take note of that throughout the story whenever I mention something that probably isn't a thing irl. I have to use Y/N with this one because there's no way I can write it without using a name for the main character, which I don't do.

But after very much procrastination and too much time spent as a draft, it's here. I'm not at all used to writing a more tentative, maybe sub-ish character, so Seolhyun's noona kink solo might be iffy. And also just pretend that Suzy and Seolhyun are in the same group/under the same agency (Kakao) for the purposes of the smut. Also my first time writing a daddy kink. It's probably just about the same as a sir kink.

Point is, this one might be iffy.

-상훈

Length: 5.81k

Possible TW: Just about nothing, just a noona kink for Seolhyun and a daddy kink for Suzy. And of course my trademark, a sprinkle of light spanking/choking.

Tags: Threesome, cunnilingus, blowjob, dom/sub, daddy kink, noona kink, choking, spanking, fingering, face riding

It was just another one of those days; sitting, waiting outside a businesswoman's office waiting to be talked to. The small plaque on the dark mahogany door read "Kim Seolhyun, Ace of Angels". The plush chair I sat on had to be the best office guest chair I'd ever sat on, predictably enough considering where I was.

Explanation time.

My name is Y/N, and I'm a week away from debuting as the next global K-pop superstar. Or at least, that's what everyone around me is saying. I'm 19, and very new to the bustling, jolting, lively atmosphere of the agency's headquarters. I'm not even completely sure of everything that's going on. I auditioned for Kakao Entertainment when I was 15 and almost immediately got a callback from them. I performed two more auditions beyond the initial one and was accepted as a trainee with high praise from judges. I signed my trainee contract and trained for 4 years, during which they touched up on my singing, rapping, dance skills, physique, modeling sagacity, and overall competence as a future idol, all of which they had described to already be near perfect. From the day I arrived on Kakao's doorstep, I had been told I was going to be the next global K-pop sensation. And now I'm a week away from debuting as a massive solo artist.

To say I'm nervous is a little bit of an understatement.

The reason why I'm here is to talk with former and current idols to orient me into what it's going to be like. I've already had conversations with a few notable ones, and now I'm outside Seolhyun's office. I've also been told Bae Suzy is here to see me, which is something I'm excited for. Suzy has been one of my favorite idols since I was really young. ___

"Mr. L/N?" Seolhyun's secretary spoke in a soft voice. "She's ready for you."

I stood up, and with a deep breath and a small adjustment of my tie, pushed open the door.

To my slight surprise, Suzy was already in the room, sitting with Seolhyun behind the desk.

Suzy gestured me in, and I took a seat in front of the desk. It was very well-organized and neat.

"Hi, Y/N." said Seolhyun. "I'm Kim Seolhyun, and this is–"

"I know who you are." I said.

She smiled warmly. "Then introductions aren't necessary, are they?"

I chuckled. "No, they aren't. I requested to meet you specifically."

Suzy smirked. "That's refreshing. Well, it's very nice to meet you, Y/N."

Seolhyun nodded.

"It's a pleasure." I replied, shaking both of their hands.

"No, the pleasure is ours." said Suzy. "It's not often we get to meet the next K-pop superstar pre-debut, is it? Especially when he's so hot~"

Seolhyun hit Suzy on the arm lightly. "Stop, isn't it too soon for that?"

"It's never too soon."

I smiled at the compliment. "Thank you, Suzy. Can I call you Suzy?"

"Yes, of course."

"So," I said, preparing to ask the list of questions I had prepared in my head. "What's the lifestyle like, being an idol?"

...

"–so basically, to sum up that point, don't fall out of line. Not publicly." Seolhyun finished.

"Unless, of course, you feel a little bit more daring, like me." Suzy threw a wink my way. "Media goes crazy for a bit of controversy."

Seolhyun rolled her eyes. "It's a daring move, but your publicity will skyrocket over a scandal. Suzy would know all about that."

Suzy grinned. "Nothing like watching your fans start World War III on social media because you didn't wear safety shorts."

Seolhyun chuckled. "Some, like Suzy, like to rock the boat a little. And it's good for publicity; the media likes a daring figure."

"So you're telling me I should cross the line a bit from time to time?" I asked.

"Yes." Suzy replied immediately.

"Not necessarily," corrected Seolhyun, side-eyeing Suzy, "it depends on what kind of idol you are to the public. But a tiny scandal here and there does keep you in the headlines, whether that be a good thing or a bad thing."

"Ok," I said slowly, "that makes sense. Other than that, what can I do to start off with a bang?"

"You?" Seolhyun said. "You might not even need any of that. I mean, they said they could have debuted you without training. They said they were considering cutting your training short and debuting you early."

"Of course, that's when funds had dipped a lot," Suzy added, "but that's not important. What's important is that they were seriously considering doing it, which never happens."

"So that either means you're already going down Suzy's route, or you're one hell of a potential." said Seolhyun.

"It's the latter."

"Yeah, I figured. All the talk around here has been about you since you started training. All the higher-ups and execs have been super excited because you'll be bringing in a lot of revenue."

"Which automatically makes you a high priority, especially once you actually start making them money." Suzy carried on. "Low-profit artists and groups are lower priority. You? You'll be pretty much as high priority as it gets, which means you can exploit it. Use it to your advantage."

"However you want to use it, bear in mind the fact that they are relying on you for profit. Of course, if you get too cocky, there's always consequences, but as long as you keep in mind the firm boundaries, you're all good."

"Okay," I said, "so I can push my luck a little, just don't overdo it."

"Exactly." Suzy replied. "You're a fast learner. And I'd advise you to wait to exercise that prioritization for a little while until they've gotten a good idea of what kind of idol you're going to be, what kind of profits you'll make them. If you do it too early, they might think early on that you're going to give them a hard time."

"And if that happens?"

"Don't know. Contract termination at the very most, but I doubt they'd do that. But they can make your life hell if they want to."

"Okay, got it. What else?"

"Well..." The two of them thought about it, and then Seolhyun spoke up. "You could try Suzy's approach..."

"Which is?" I prompted.

"Sucking a lot of music producer dick." Suzy laughed.

Her reply took me be surprise, but I barely reacted. "Yeah, I'm afraid I won't be sucking any dick on my way up."

Suzy chortled. "I don't mean that, dummy. But there happen to be a lot of female employees, execs, bosses, producers...I'm not saying do what I did, but all I'll say is...it'll get you in the good books."

"And considering what you have to offer..." Seolhyun added, unconsciously licking her lips as her eyes trailed down me.

Despite myself, I felt my cheeks go a bit red. "Thanks, noona."

She blushed a little and giggled.

Suzy rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Don't get her started, Y/N."

"What?"

"Seolhyun has a thing for being called that. Like, a big thing."

"Oh." I said simply. "Sorry."

"Don't be." She smirked. "In fact, that brings us to our next point, in a roundabout way."

"What's your next point?"

"If, as I advise you, you walk my path, play to your higher-up's kinks. Obviously they'll like it anyway it and therefore you'll be in the good books, but if you play to their kinks, it's like an automatic figurative promotion. I remember one time when I was dealing with this one exec who had a mommy kink–"

"Yeah, yeah, we don't need to hear that one." Seolhyun interrupted. "Don't put him off before he even debuts."

"I'm not into that mommy shit, but I can play along to just about anything." The implications of my sentence were not missed by the two of them.

"Oh, can you?" Seolhyun's voice was suddenly lower, quieter. The two exchanged a knowing look, one that spoke more than a book full of words. "What do you think, unnie?"

Suzy nodded at her and looked back at me.

"We'd like to offer you a special...orientation program." Her voice took on the same tone.

"Oh?" My thoughts ran wilder. "And what would such a program entail?"

"Oh, you know..." Seolhyun trailed off as they both rose from their chairs. "Suzy's route."

"Yeah, we'll be sure to tell the execs how good you are...if you're good." They approached.

My pants were feeling uncomfortably tight at that moment, and it did not go unnoticed by them.

"Ooh, he's liking that idea." The two of them moved closer, their thighs rubbing against mine, hands caressing my arms. I was suddenly very aware of Suzy's tiny skirt, Seolhyun's short shorts. "Let's see what we're working with here."

Shrugging out of my blazer as Suzy pulled on it from behind me, I rid myself of the extra layer and loosened my tie. Suzy's hands unbuttoned the buttons on my shirt one by one all the way down and pulled the bottom of it out of my waistband, leaving it on me.

"Oh~" Seolhyun's eyes widened. "He's quite the specimen, unnie."

I flexed my abs and arms for her benefit, and she bit her lip with lust in her eyes. "Can't wait to give this one a test ride, mmm..."

Suzy unbuckled my belt from behind me and slipped it out of its hoops, allowing Seolhyun to slide my pants down my legs and off my Oxford-clad feet.

"Looks like Y/N has a big thing too, unnie...damn."

Suzy came back around to have a look, and she smirked, nodding in approval.

"Nice, now that's a body that's had a hell of a lot of work put into it. And a massive cock, too..."

My face was going red again. "Thank you."

Seolhyun straddled me, sitting comfortably on the straining bulge of my boxers, barely concealing the gasp that left her lips when it rubbed her through her shorts. "Ah, enough niceties, let's get to your orientation."

"One at a time or same time?" asked Suzy.

"One at a time, then both, I wanna see what this kid can do first."

Suzy opened the door and disappeared, leaving me and Seolhyun alone.

Her voice dropped to a growl as she leaned into my ear, slowly rocking her hips on me, pulling my face closer to hers by the tie. "You said you can play along, hm?"

"Uh, yeah, I did."

She pulled back a little, her expression half eagerness and half interest. "Then make sure you do."

With a flourish she stripped off her small top, a sexy lace bra the only thing between me and her full breasts.

"Mm, you like what you see baby?"

"Yes..." I couldn't take my eyes off her.

"Hmm?" She raised her eyebrows, the grinding coming to a sudden halt.

"Y-yes, noona."

She smiled and resumed her grinding. "Good."

Something in her tone turned me on, more than the pleasure of her grating her hips on me. Usually I had a slight leaning towards being a dom, but something about her dominant aura pushed me towards the other end of the spectrum.

She got off me and slipped her shorts down her legs, straightening up to reveal her tiny little thong, which left absolutely nothing to the imagination. I caught my breath, cock now furiously straining against the thin fabric of my boxers. She slid back onto me, two millimeters of cloth the only thing keeping her heat off me.

"Can I touch you, noona?"

She moaned quietly at the sensation she was causing herself, and nodded. Her eyes closed and she bit her lip as I reached up and caressed her breasts over the thin lace fabric, pinching her nipples. I slipped a finger under her thong and rubbed her clit.

"Ooh, yes, just like that," she cooed. "You sure know what you're doing, had practice?"

"Yes, noona." I fingered her harder and took my hand off her breast and moved it to her ass, squeezing a moan out of her. She reached up and fondled her own breasts, and she allowed me to reach behind her and unclasp the bra, unleashing her treasures.

I took off my own shirt as she leaned her face down and kissed me, the gyrations starting to get more needy.

"F-fuck, I want you, Y/N." Her breath came out shaky as she found the perfect spot to grind on and jumped on it, increasing the speed of her movements.

I pushed my boxers down past my thighs and finally freed myself, and she gasped. "Oh my god, you're so big..."

She quickly rid herself of her thong and returned to my lap, lining me up with her entrance and slowly sinking down, suppressing a whimper as she felt herself being filled up. I stretched her out inch by inch until her crotch met my base. Her head fell back and she took a second to adjust, before she started to bounce on top of me. My cock was driven in and out of her tight tunnel, and it was overwhelming. She must not've had anyone in a while because she was certainly the tightest I'd ever had. She clenched around me on purpose on the way down, forcing a groan out of my mouth.

"Does it feel good sweetie?"

I didn't answer immediately, mind lost in the sensations she was causing me. Her thin hand slipped around my neck, not gripping but making her assertion clear.

"Does it feel good?" Her voice dropped a little lower.

"Yes, noona."

Her smile returned. "Good."

I pressed a finger to her clit, and moved it up and down in time with her bouncing. She kept kneading her own tits, moaning and squealing adorably.

"Fuck, noona, you're tight!" The pleasure was too good, she was going to make me cum. "So tight!"

"I know, hold on baby." She purred. "Don't cum yet."

Doing so was difficult, but I managed to stave off the impending orgasm and let her keep spearing her pussy on me. I brought my hand down on her ass, making her yelp, and she bounced harder, raising her eyebrows.

"Now now, let's – ahh – control ourselves, hmm?"

"Yes, s-sorry noona."

Seolhyun suppressed another cry and gripped my shoulders, humping into me with barely controlled lust.

"Such a nice dick, big and hard for me, yeah?"

I only moaned in reply, meeting her bounces with thrusts, jabbing deeper into her. She clenched around me harder in an involuntary response, failing to muffle her yells on each thrust.

"Noona," I groaned, "what about the–fuck–secretary? Won't she-"

"No, she won't."

I inwardly shrugged and thrusted harder, teetering dangerously on the verge of cumming inside her.

"Fuck, I can't hold on," I gripped her hips and pulled her down, jabbing into her. "Should I pull out?"

"No," she murmured, her eyebrows contracting. "Cum inside me!"

Unable to stave it off any longer, I felt that rush of pleasure, the tensing of my entire body. Her eyes flew open and she gasped at the first spurt. She rode it out until she'd taken every last drop from me, and then relaxed her body. Our heavy breaths eventually slowed, and she got off me and quickly got dressed.

"Fuck, you're good. You'll have no trouble in that area, no trouble at all. Rest up, Suzy will want her turn. And get at least partially dressed, she'll want to strip you too." She paused for a moment. "She's the exact opposite of me in the bedroom. She likes to be dominated."

I smirked widely. "Oh, I don't think I'll have any trouble with that."

She returned the smirk. "Neither do I. Well, have fun..."

I heard the sound of a door opening and shutting behind me, and two female voices outside for a few seconds. I pulled on my pants, got out of the chair, and leaned against it, facing the door. The door opened and Suzy sidled in, hands clasped in front of her. She bit her lip when she caught sight of me, and I got off the desk.

I let her take her time approaching, her hips subtly swaying with each step. She reached me and slid a hand over my bare chest, a small and shy smile on her face. Her demeanor had completely changed, something I was more than willing to take advantage of.

I snaked my hand up her chest and fastened it around her neck. She gasped and bit her lip again, leaning into me. I turned her around and pushed her against the desk, my other hand slithering to her skirt and pulling it up. She moaned as I slipped my hand into her black panties and slowly rubbed her slit.

"Mmm," she whimpered, "ohh yes, that's good..."

"Yeah, you like that baby?"

"Mmhmm," she replied in a high pitched tone, nodding eagerly with her eyes closed. I tightened my grip on her neck, and she inhaled sharply.

"What was that?"

"Yes, daddy..."

"Good girl." I growled in her ear, fingering her harder, and her breathing got faster and heavier.

"Daddy it feels so good," she moaned, then cried out at me circling her clit with my thumb. "Oh please daddy, harder!"

I slipped two fingers into her pussy and moved them around slowly, curling them down into her g-spot. She clutched my arm and took in a deep, shaky breath, mouth falling open.

"Fuck! I'm gonna cum!"

"Do it," I muttered, busy at work on her pussy. "Cum for me."

"Ohh fuck, faster, please!" I obliged, moving faster and strumming her spots like the strings of a guitar. Her body trembled and her walls clenched around me, almost crushing my fingers. I slipped a third inside her and pushed, now knuckle deep. But I wasn't about to let her cum so quick, I had much more to do to her.

Suzy's eyes had rolled back by the time I pulled my fingers out, and she'd fallen silent in nearly orgasmic bliss. She looked down at my drenched and motionless fingers and immediately put on adorable puppy eyes.

"Please let me cum, daddy," she begged submissively. "Please, I need to cum..."

"Oh, you need to?"

"Yes, daddy, I do..."

I turned her around and bent her over the desk, then resumed my fingering at a much slower pace. She bucked her hips back into my outstretched fingers, whining needily.

"Faster, please!" She pleaded. "I need to cum, please daddy, let me cum, harder, please..."

I slapped her ass and she yelped, clenching around me again. "Be quiet."

"Yes, daddy."

I did pick up the pace a little, and employed my thumb to rub her clit, continuing the spanks since I noticed she enjoyed it. I was feeling an increasing desire to take my pants off and pound her senseless, but I wanted to make her cum with just my fingers first. And I was very, very close to doing so, judging by her facial and vocal expressions.

"So–good–yes–please–cumming!" Her pleas had spiraled into unintelligible babble as she got closer to her climax. "Harder–fuck–gonna cum!"

My shoulder was beginning to feel sore from the exertion I was putting it through, but I ignored it and kept pumping into her, paying special attention to her more sensitive areas and driving her insane with pleasure. Every stroke brought her closer to her release, and finally it was too much for her.

"OH F-FUCK!" Body trembling and writhing, Suzy orgasmed with a loud cry, her juices gushing out over my fingers. Her pussy tensed and spasmed uncontrollably on them.

Noticing her legs wobbling dangerously, I held her up and helped her into the chair. Her face was flushed red and stray strands of hair were sticking to her sweat-sheened forehead.

"D-daddy..." she whimpered, giving me the puppy eyes again, "I want you..."

I rid myself of my pants and boxers and approached her, seeing arousal flare in her eyes at the sight of me.

"Give me your dick, daddy." She sat up and reached forward, grasping my now-hard cock.

I reached down and pulled her hands off. "Hands to yourself, baby girl. Get on your knees."

"Yes, daddy."

She knelt in front of me, and I grabbed her head by her hair and pulled it forward, guiding my cock into her mouth.

"Mmph!" She raised her hands to my thighs and gave them a small nip as my shaft slid down her tight, squeezing throat.

She gagged a bit and struggled, but didn't tap out, instead massaging the underside of my cock with her tongue.

"Mm, such a good girl," I said, twirling her hair around my fingers and pulling her deeper. "Such a good little slut for me."

One of her hands left my leg and I heard an obscene squelch, combined with a moan into my dick. She was getting turned on by the little bit of dirty talk already.

"A stupid little whore, aren't you?" I continued, flinging out whatever dirty names I could fish up from memory of past sub girls. "Just a dirty slut."

She nodded and moaned again, her arm working more furiously beneath her skirt. I gritted my teeth and let my head tip back.

"Fuck, that feels good," I felt her self-pleased smile against my base. "Keep going, baby girl."

She choked and a little saliva ran down her chin, closely followed by a tear from her effort. She took the other hand off my leg and started caressing her own breast, eyes rolling in her head at the pleasure she was giving herself.

Her lower face was slowly becoming a mess of tears mixing with saliva from her sloppy blowjob. The mess she was making of herself clearly turned her on. From what little I could see of the face that was buried in my crotch, her eyebrows were turned up, I could feel her jaw starting to go slack. I gripped her hair harder and thrust my hips harder, drawing nearer to my own orgasm. But I wasn't going to cum before I'd fucked her, so I semi-reluctantly pulled out of her throat. She sat back and caught her breath for a moment before she stood up and bent over the desk, wiggling her ass enticingly.

I pushed into her with absolutely no hesitation, and she was wet enough that I didn't need to play with her any more. She was even tighter than Seolhyun, and I put my hand over her mouth to suppress her loud moan.

"Shhh." I murmured, and let go of her mouth. "Keep that pretty little mouth quiet."

I started thrusting into her, fast and steady. Her hands gripped the edge of the desk and she gritted her teeth to keep from making noise. I reached forward and grabbed her hair, forming it into a rough ponytail and pulling her head back.

"Daddy, it's too good, I can't hold b-back," she moaned, biting her lip. "You're so big, fuck..."

I fucked her faster, the desk creaking a little under the repeated motion. I could tell she was trying her best to keep herself from crying out, but I also knew it was coming.

"F-fuck, I can't...I can't...keep...quiet..."

She was shaking with suppressed pleasure and bucking her hips back on me. I slapped her ass, making her squeal, and pulled on her hair harder. Her tight hole compressed around my cock like it was made for me, the perfect balance between ease and resistance. I pushed two of my fingers on my other hand into her mouth, and she started sucking on them, moaning quietly.

"Give me more, please, daddy," she murmured, voice barely audible. "Faster, please...nghh yes keep going!"

My hips smacked against her thick ass with each thrust, the claps reverberating around the small room. I took my hand away from her mouth and brought it down to her clit, rubbing circles and pressing down, making the volume increase dramatically.

"Didn't I tell you to stay quiet?" I smacked her ass again.

"A-ah! Yes, daddy, I'm s-sorry!"

"Good." I resumed my fingering, making her whimper in her effort. It only took a few seconds of determined caressing of her clit to bring her resolve crumbing down once more.

"Fuck! It's so good daddy, please don't stop! Yes, yes, yes, more!"

I pulled out of her pussy and spanked her plump ass again. "Guess you're getting punished, baby girl."

"No, please! Please don't stop, I'm so close!" She desperately bucked her hips, trying to get me to fuck her again.

I didn't reply, but hauled her onto the desk and spread her legs, reaching forward to choke her. She gasped at the sensation of my head pressing into her pussy again, but nodded after a moment.

I snapped my hips forward and, due to how slick my cock was from her slick, easily pushed most of my length into her, drawing a guttural groan from her. She looked at me with pleading eyes, her expression indicating just how needy she was.

"Fuck my pussy hard, daddy," she breathed, "pound me like I'm your little slut."

"You are my little slut." I gripped her neck tighter and started my thrusts at a slower pace, still powerful. "Understood?"

"Yes, daddy."

"Good girl."

She shuddered and moaned, eyes rolling back in her head as I fucked her.

"Ohh yes, that feels so good..." she whined, hands still clutching the table's edge. "God yes, please keep going..."

"Shut up." I said "This is your punishment, remember?"

"Mmhmm!" She nodded vigorously. "It's my–fuck–punishment..."

I spanked her ass again and drove my cock into her faster. This hadn't been what I'd expected when I'd come in here, but I certainly wasn't complaining about the outcome.

"I'm gonna cum," I growled in her ear. "And you're going to take it all like a good girl, aren't you?"

"Yes, daddy," she gasped, her walls tightening around me as she bucked her hips. "I want all your cum in me!"

Her words sent me over the edge, and with a groan I buried myself inside her pussy and exploded, firing my hot cum deep into her womb. A rush of pleasure flowed through me, sending the feeling everywhere from my fingers to my toes. My muscles tightened and contracted, involuntarily sending my hips into her ass again. She jerked and trembled as the waves of orgasmic pleasure overtook her too, a powerful jet of cum spraying me.

"Fuck, daddy, yes!" She screamed, back arching. "S-so fucking good, yes!"

I pulled out of her pussy and collapsed back into the chair, sufficiently tired out for the time being. Her legs relaxed and fell into a resting position, and she slumped back and laid down.

...

It was a little while before either of us found the energy to do much other than pant and sit there resting. I heard the door creak open, looked over the top of the chair, and saw half of Seolhyun's grinning face peeking through the small opening.

"Yes?"

She smiled wider and closed the door, eyes raking over Suzy's slumped and naked form before doing so. I stood up and pushed the chair aside, went to and opened the door, and gestured Seolhyun in.

"You up for another round?" She asked immediately.

"Hell yes. Think Suzy's out, though."

"I want to ride your face." Her words were clear and decisive. I was entirely okay with that, so I laid down on my back on the carpeted floor. She then stripped off the large nightshirt she'd covered with and stood over my face, giving me an incredible view of everything she had to give. With no further ado she lowered her pussy onto my awaiting mouth and started grinding. I had a perfect visual of her softly whining and caressing her own breasts as she rubbed her slit against my tongue, which was prodding, swiping, and licking any part of her that was sensitive. She let out soft moans, moving her hips back and forth and pleasuring herself on my mouth.

As I was busy eating her out, I heard a creak from the desk and soft footsteps on the plush carpet. A minute later, Suzy's hands slid over my thighs and my cock was suddenly enveloped in a warmth which I could only assume to be her mouth. I groaned into Seolhyun's pussy and kept up my exertions, very quickly pushing her to her climax.

"Oh, fuck, just like that baby," she moaned, biting her lip and closing her eyes. Her eyebrows contracted as I circled her clit with the tip of my tongue. "Oh yes, I'm gonna cum!"

I worked my tongue harder, pushing into her entrance firmly. She shuddered and her legs tensed around my head, a sure sign of her approaching orgasm.

"Oh, you're so good at this, fuck! Oh god yes yes, don't stop!" I smirked, my ego stroked, and bucked my own hips a little into Suzy's mouth. Her tongue disappeared from my shaft momentarily and then something much wetter, much tighter pressed down on it. I let my head fall back a little as she impaled her warm, throbbing pussy on my cock, the pleasure doubling. I heard a loud cry from behind Seolhyun and I automatically started thrusting up into her.

For several minutes more, Suzy fucked me and I tonguefucked Seolhyun. She had been reduced to mindless pleas for more, body on autopilot as she gyrated her hips on my face. I was apparently way better with my tongue than I thought, and it was only a few more seconds before all three of us reached our peaks at the same time.

I went first, blowing up her pussy with a deluge of hot jizz that triggered her to cum; her warm juices splattered my abs and ran down my sides. Seolhyun's grinding sped up exponentially and then with a scream she met her orgasm. Her cum squirted into my waiting mouth and she fell back into Suzy's lap with an exhausted moan. We all stayed there for a moment more, basking in the after-orgasm bliss, before a notification pinged Seolhyun's phone. She picked it up, read the message, and scoffed. I looked up and could make out a text from one of her superiors:

"Having fun?"

She looked over at the security camera in the corner and gave it a sarcastic wave before putting down her phone and getting up. She dressed again quickly and left.

Suzy stood up clumsily a second later, a small trickle of my cum falling onto my abs. She too got dressed and left, leaving me alone in Seolhyun's office. I stood up, wiped my own cum off my abs with a paper towel, and put my boxers and pants back on. From what I could hear outside, one of the superiors had come down to see what was going on, judging by the voices outside.

"–yes, he was amazing. He knows his stuff." Seolhyun's voice said.

"Suzy?" said a male voice.

"Yes, he's such a good dom, he's so sexy and confident..." She said.

"Good, good. Yet another attribute we can add to the list of perfections. He's sure to be a hit soon enough."

I smiled and pulled away from the door, ego points going through the roof right about then. The conversation continued for a couple more minutes, then the door opened and one of my managers came in, dressed in a suit and tie.

"Ah, Y/N." He said briskly. "If you'll be so kind as to put on a shirt, you've been requested by one of your producers. He wants to talk about your title track, something about the lead sounds on the track. I really have no idea what the issue is, but he said he needs you right away."

I pulled my shirt over my head and refastened my tie around it, leaving the blazer on the chair. "He's been fussing about that for about a week. Might as well go see what we can improve."

"Thank you. Now, if you'll follow me..."

I followed him out the door and into the hall, where Suzy and Seolhyun were both standing, still flushed red. I threw Suzy a wink as I passed and she blushed harder, giggling. A satisfied smirk back on my face and confidence swelling within me, I followed the manager down the hall towards the studio, feeling that things could only go well from here.

[jamiepaige]

Constant Companions Closeup #1: DYAD

(also on spotify!)

Hello everyone!! It's been a couple weeks and change since Constant Companions, my newest album, was released unto the world, and I've been genuinely blown away by the response. Genuinely, thank you to everyone who's been streaming, commenting, making mashups, changing their pfps and usernames - it means the world to me!

I wanted to give some of that love back with something people have been asking me a lot about - and, admittedly, something I love doing. Song explanations! Deep dives! Dropping the lore! Welcome... to the Constant Companions Closeups...

For the next eleven days, I'll be going into each track one by one and babbling about the process, inspiration, details, feelings, and thoughts behind each one! We're getting sappy. We're bearing our hearts. We're telling unfunny jokes. And we're starting with track one - DYAD (featuring unit.0)!

---

Naturally, since this is the first track, it also serves as a great point to talk about my intention with this album as a whole!

I'll elaborate more on this with future tracks, but to me, there are really two main things that define the sonic progression of this album versus my previous work - guitars and vocal synths. Obviously, these things have been present in my work since I first started calling myself Jamie Paige, but Constant Companions is intended to be my overwrought, sappy confession of love to these two things that time and time again have made me simply want to make music. I love rock and I love Hatsune Miku dammit!!!

I had originally written this song in February of 2023 for a game-jam-esque online festival hosted by my friend Loni called HAPPY PARTY TRI, and at that time, I had found myself at a major crossroads. I had put out People Posture Play Pretend and :women_wrestling: the previous year, and while the response was nice, I was feeling listless and lost.

I love singing. I like my voice well enough. I certainly love writing music with lyrics!! But... there was something uniquely electrifying about using vocal synths. Amidst a lot of insecurity and emotional turmoil surrounding the process of making art and putting myself out into the world, it was one of the few things that just made everything feel right. Suddenly, I was making the same kind of music that had touched my heart so many times over.

Would it alienate people, though? Would I lose longtime listeners? Yes, that weighed on my mind more than I'd like to admit, but even more than that... I was worried I'd lose some part of myself, as silly as it sounds. Maybe what I thought was a bridge would become a barrier, and the messages I wanted to send across the gap would never find their way.

Ultimately, I felt that Dyad was the only kind of opener I could've possibly given this album, and a perfect fit for the album's motif. A dialogue between myself, stricken with loneliness and a lack of inertia running in circles, and that synthesized voice (ANRI Arcane my darling), grabbing the outstretched hand and asking a question I already know the answer to -

"Baby, do you know what you wanna hear?"

Yes, it's a love song, but it's not just for a person - it's a love song for the creative impulse, and for the places I wanted it to take me.

im resisting the urge to be jokingly dismissive of myself to diffuse tension but i still need to signal that the emotionally bare part of this is over so pretend im doing a funny little dance Anyways let's talk more technical stuff

---

Like many of my songs, Dyad came together from a patchwork of different snippets and ideas I had laying around. The back half of the chorus - "dream together, we can dream together" - originally came from this idea I had jotted down something like 9 months prior, but ended up being a perfect fit for Dyad in basically every way. The verse snippet that I'd written to go with it got reused for a later song on Constant Companions as well! (I say without naming it, as if it isn't literally lifted wholesale from this demo and thus incredibly obvious)

I wasn't originally planning on brazenly quoting the bridge of a Tally Hall song when I set out to write this song, but while toying around with a bridge idea involving a shortened version of the pre-chorus melody, I realized I had inadvertently copied it anyways. I was going to scrap it... but at the request of my dear friend and certified Tally Hall lover Marcy Nabors, I made it an explicit reference. Which I'm fine with, personally! The first CD I ever owned was a copy of Marvin's Marvelous Mechanical Museum my sister bought me all the way back in 2006 - You can pry that sentimental attachment from my cold, dead hands, TikTok kiddies.

Lastly - not really behind the scenes so much as just a shoutout - thank you to unit.0 for the lovely lead guitar work on this song!! He's been a beloved collaborator of mine for many, many years now, and one of the people who ultimately convinced me this direction was the right one to go in, so it means a lot to share this song with him. Go listen to his music!!! Now!!!!!!

That's about it for this song! Not to sound like a fucking YouTuber, but genuinely, if there are any details you'd like to hear more about, let me know and I might made a bonus post at the end of all this. Otherwise, thank you for listening! Tomorrow: Not Quite There, featuring telebasher!

❤️💚

[dixons-sunshine]

js read your shopping spree and dying for your haircut fics and omg

can u pretty please, with a bow on top, write another part to that series or like an au where they get separated at the fall of the world and a few season later (preferably that prison era of daryl he was so fawking sexy there like omg) they found each other again and i want some build up to their reunion yk like someone else finds r and brings them in and some ppl kinda chatting abt the new girl or wtv and dars not rlly gaf cuz he kinda getting tired of trying to find r (realistically i don’t think he’d give up easily but let’s js pretend yk) but then they see each other and they’re like omfg the love of my life’s here and safe and like i need that glenn and maggie type reunion but like tenfold bc r and dar alr loved and knew each other before the fall yk and like yeah😣

idky but i’m a sucker for “r and daryl had a relationship beforehand, got separated, and reunited” trope (?) fic, blurb shit and you’d literally be godsent if u wrote this oml

I Found You | Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Summary: When the dead started to rise and the world went to hell, Daryl got seperated from you, the love of his life. After over a year of searching for you and finding no evidence of your survival, Daryl was beginning to give up and count his losses. One day, Carol stumbled upon a wounded woman while out on a run with Glenn, and the two of them decide to accept you into the prison. Little did they know, that would end up being one of the best decisions they could've ever made.

Genre: Angst to fluff.

Era: Prison, pre season 4, post season 3.

Warnings: Swearing, blood, death, mentions of attempted sexual assault (not descriptive)

Word count: 4.3k

A/n: Thank you so much for the request! I've decided to write the au since there's already a part three for the SSHD (Shopping Spree, Hangout Dreams) universe in the works, but this request was way too good to not write. I hope you like it! And I absolutely agree with you. There's something about prison era Daryl that just hits different. He was on another level completely.

As always, my requests are open for any TWD requests.

(Just thought I'd say that both third- and second person is used. I referred to the reader in third  person when Glenn and Carol first met her, but it soon shifts to second person when she introduced herself. Just thought I'd let y'all know the shift is intentional.)

—

“Okay, so I can't guess what you did before all of this correctly, but I bet there is something that I will be right about.”

Daryl looked at Zach skeptically as they trudged through the abandoned store, looking for supplies to bring back to the prison. “Yeah? Wha's tha'?”

“You're brooding, quiet, you like to keep to yourself,” Zach started, leaning nonchalantly against one of the shelves while he watched the archer place multiple different packs and boxes into his bag. “The way you act most of the time would suggest you've never been in a relationship before, but there are clear signs that you were with someone before all of this.”

Daryl stiffened for a moment, his hand lingering above a pack, before regaining his composure and continuing his task. “Wha' signs?”

“Well, for one, you know exactly what kind of tampons and pads to get for the ladies at the prison. I would've just dumped everything in and have them sort through it, but you are only taking specific brands,” Zach pointed out, motioning to the box of tampons Daryl had just put back onto the shelf.

When Daryl didn't reply, Zach took that as his cue to continue. “And while we're on the topic of periods, you seem to know exactly what to get the girls for the pain and what to do to curve their bad tempers. What guy would know that if he didn't have a girlfriend before all of this? And to top it all off, and this is totally unrelated to everything I just said, I've seen that locket necklace you keep in your pocket. It's pretty worn out and faded, but you can definitely tell it's something from this generation, so it can't be something that was passed down from a relative, so that brings me to my conclusion. You, Daryl Dixon, had a girl before all of this.”

Daryl sighed, shutting his eyes tightly as he willed the onslaught of memories away. Memories that were too painful to think of, memories that did nothing but remind the archer of his failure. His failure at finding you, the love of his life, after the dead started walking. A failure he had to live with for as long as he remained alive.

Daryl opened his eyes and turned abruptly, leaving the young man behind him as he stalked towards the exit, his bag slung over his shoulder. Zach hurriedly caught up to him, struggling to keep at a steady pace beside him as Daryl strode quickly, wanting to put some distance between him and Zach.

“Woah, man! Slow down!” Zach complained, jogging to keep up with him. “Was it because I brought up the girl thing? I didn't realise it was a touchy subject.”

“It ain't none of yer damn business,” Daryl grumbled under his breath, stalking over to the truck him and Zach were using that day.

“Daryl! Come on, man. It's not that deep.”

Daryl gritted his teeth as he opened up the driver's side door of the truck, throwing his bag into the back before climbing inside. He started up the truck and revved the engine, a warning sign to Zach that he was about to leave, with or without him.

Zach hurriedly scurried into the passenger seat, barely having time to close the door before Daryl started speeding off. He gripped the edge of his seat, sending Daryl an exasperated look.

“Daryl, what the hell? Calm down!” he exclaimed, unnerved by the archer's sudden burst of fury. He'd seen Daryl angry before, but it was never directed towards him. It was downright scary.

“'M calm,” Daryl replied through gritted teeth, his hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“That's what you call calm?!” Zach exclaimed, motioning out towards the road. “You're driving like a maniac! Slow down!”

Daryl simply ignored the man, keeping his eyes trained on the road. Memories of you unwillingly flooded his mind. Memories of your smile, your laugh and your beautiful eyes. Memories of the calm mornings you'd spend with the archer in your shared sad excuse for an apartment where the hot water was a joke. Memories where you'd both stand under the cold water of the shower, Daryl embracing you from behind in an attempt to make the cold water bearable for you. Memories of your loving touch on his skin, your fingers lightly tracing over the scars on his back as you whispered reassuring things into his ear, assuring him that his father's abuse had nothing to do with him, that it wasn't his fault that any of that happened to him.

The more Daryl's mind wandered, the more he remembered some of the bad memories. All those arguments you had with him over some of his escapades with Merle, telling him that it would only get him into trouble, flooded his mind. One of those arguments ended up being the reason he got seperated from you in the first place.

Merle had wanted to go do some drug deal and had barged into your apartment, practically dragging Daryl from your bed. You had begged him not to go, arguing with him that it was a bad idea and that something would go wrong this time. He remembered being so angry at you for insisting during that argument that Merle wasn't good for him, that he needed to cut back on seeing him or set some boundaries with him. He had stormed out of the apartment without so much as a goodbye, and now he regretted it more than he's regretted anything before in his life.

Daryl blamed himself daily for not having listened to you that day. If he had, he never would've been seperated from you and you would've been safe by his side. He longed to have you by his side again, to tell you that he was sorry and that he loved you. However, even after all this time of searching, going out for extended periods of time to look for signs of you, it was to no avail. You were gone, and it was all his fault.

“Daryl? Are... you okay?”

Daryl snapped back to reality at the sound of Zach's concerned voice. He felt a droplet of water roll down his cheek and he hurriedly wiped it away, realising that he was crying. He hadn't even realised that tears had started to well up in his eyes, so immersed was he in his own thoughts.

“'M fine,” Daryl insisted, wiping his eyes hurriedly as he willed the tears away.

Zach furrowed his eyebrows, before realisation dawned on him. “You did have a girl before all of this. You lost her, didn't you?” he asked sympathetically.

Daryl hesitantly nodded, swallowing in an attempt to get rid of the lump in his throat. “I didn't lose her,” he began, bringing the truck to a halt in front of the prison gates as he waited for someone to open them.

“I don't know if she's even dead at all. She's just... Gone.”

—

“What are we looking for, exactly?” Glenn asked Carol as they scanned over the shelving of an abandoned pharmacy, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Carol sighed as she looked upon yet another empty shelf, its medical contents a thing of the past. “Anything medical. With all the new people we've been taking in, the supplies we have aren't going to be enough.”

“Okay,” Glenn drawled hesitantly. “But it doesn't look like there's anything worth scavenging here.”

“Let's just do a once over before we check the back. If there's nothing, we head on back. It's getting late,” Carol instructed. Glenn nodded, and the two of them dispersed to sweep through the small store once more.

“So,” Glenn started. “Is it just me, or has Daryl been more grumpy than usual?”

Carol hummed in agreement. “He has. He gets angry at the smallest of things lately.”

“Do you know why?”

“No,” Carol said, shaking her head. “I've asked him, but he won't say anything. Just tells me to mind my own business. It's really odd. He's more like he was back at the quarry. More closed off and snappy and I don't know why.”

“It's ever since he came back from that run with Zach a week ago,” Glenn replied, meeting up with the Carol again to go into the back room. “I've asked Zach if he knows why, but he refused to say anything. Says it's not his place to say.”

Carol frowned, opening the door that lead into the back room. “That's odd. So that means something—”

“Stay right there. Don't move another inch or I swear to god I'll shoot.”

Both Carol and Glenn froze in their tracks. They looked up and locked eyes with a woman, who's eyes were fiery as they darted between them.

“Names. Now. And weapons on the ground.”

“Okay, alright,” Carol responded, trying to diffuse the situation. She slowly lowered her gun and knife to the ground, urging Glenn to do the same. “I'm Carol, and this is Glenn. Now before we answer anymore questions, what's your name?”

The woman hesitated for a moment. “Y/n. What are you doing here?”

“We were looking for some supplies,” Carol spoke truthfully, eyeing the gun aimed at her carefully. “We're running low on medical things.”

After a couple of long, tense moments, with you scanning them from head to toe, you nodded to yourself after spotting something. Deciding to trust them for now, you slowly lowered the gun. However, you quietly hissed in pain, quickly clutching your side as you stumbled to regain your balance. After you steadied yourself, you limped over to your bag and grabbed a few things before handing them over to Carol and Glenn.

“Here. Hope these help. The place was ransacked when I got here. Wasn't a lot left to clear out.”

“Thank you, but we need more than this. This isn't going to last us long,” Carol responded, placing the items into her bag.

“No offence, lady, but I think I need the supplies more than you do at the moment. And I gave you more than half already. I can't spare more,” you said, clutching your side tightly.

“What happened?” Glenn asked, pointing to the your side, unable to stop his curiosity from seeping through.

“Flesh eaters,” you replied nonchalantly, shrugging your shoulders. “I was fighting a bunch of them when one lunged at me from the side. It toppled me through a broken window, and a shard sliced me.”

“Don't you have a group? Couldn't they help you?” Glenn questioned.

“Nope. I've been on my own since this whole thing started. I guess I should probably find a group, though. Things like this wouldn't happen if I had backup.”

You gingerly lifted your shirt, and both Carol and Glenn grimaced at the painful sight. The wound was deep and oozing blood. It would definitely need stitches, as well as someone to remove the remaining fragments of glass that still painfully stuck out of the wound. It was terrible. You wouldn't be able to get it all out without a professional.

Suddenly, an idea struck Carol. “You gave us some of the supplies you scavenged without even knowing us. Why?”

“Well, you didn't try to kill me, even after I held you at gunpoint. And by the looks of it, you guys have a group and are set up somewhere. Figured I should do the honourable thing and offer up some medical things if there's kids involved.”

“How do you know there's kids?” Glenn asked, confused.

“I can see the toys in your bag,” you pointed out, motioning to the toy truck that stuck out of the top of his bag. “Figured that adults wouldn't be playing with toy trucks while the world was ending.”

“Still, why would you? You don't owe us anything,” Carol questioned, though her mind was already set on one thing.

“Some might call me naive, but I hope that by doing some good in this fucked up world, karma will decide to do something good for me. That probably makes me stupid as shit, huh?” you replied, laughing before wincing at the pain that shot through your side at the small action.

Carol smiled at you. “We have a group set up not too far from here, at the prison. You can join if you want, but you have to answer three questions first.”

You raised your eyebrows at her. “Three questions? That's it?”

“Yeah.”

You shrugged your shoulders. “Alright, shoot.”

“How many walkers have you killed?” Carol began, watching you closely.

“A lot. Too many to keep track of at this point.”

“How many people have you killed?”

You hesitated for a moment, guilt creeping up on you. “Three.”

“Why?”

“Two of them were bit. They asked me to kill them. The other one... That bastard tried to rape me. I wouldn't let him.”

“I'm sorry,” Glenn said sympathetically.

“It's fine. I'm fine,” you waved him off, before turning your attention back to Carol. “How'd I do? Satisfactory enough?”

Carol nodded. “For me, yes. You'll still need to meet the leader and have him evaluate you, but I think you'll be alright. You'll fit in just fine.”

“Hopefully,” you laughed nervously, instantly paying the price for it with a sharp pain shooting up your side, making you visibly wince.

“Come on, let's get going. We have a doctor who can get that checked out for you,” Glenn prompted. He walked over to you and grabbed your bag, stopping your protest instantly. “It's fine, I've got it. One extra bag won't kill me.”

Together, all of you made your way out of the pharmacy and over to their car. You got settled in the back while Carol and Glenn got into the front, and before long you were setting off to the prison. Your eyes were beginning to droop, but Glenn seemed eager to get to know the new recruit better.

“What were you doing out there on your own anyway?”

“I was looking for my boyfriend. I was hoping that he might still be alive.”

“No luck?” he asked.

“No,” you shook your head, pursing your lips. “I'm beginning to think I might never find him, if he's even still alive.”

“Never say never,” Glenn encouraged you. “You'll find him someday, I know it.”

“I really hope so.”

—

“Have you seen that new chick Glenn and Carol brought back? She's a real looker.”

“I know, right? You think she's into blondes?”

“Even if she was, I doubt she'd go for your scrawny ass.”

“Easy, boys. She might not even be into guys. I could have a shot with her for all you know.”

Daryl groaned inwardly as he entered the cellblock. The new girl that Glenn and Carol brought in the day before was seemingly the hottest topic of discussion amongst everyone and he couldn't escape it, no matter where he tried to run to. Nobody, apart from Glenn, Carol, Rick and Hershel have officially met her, yet everybody had seemingly already formed an opinion about her. Although there were a lot of different opinions, everyone seemingly agreed on one thing; the new girl was hotter than hell.

Daryl was the only guy in the entire prison that hadn't seen her yet. He was out hunting when Carol and Glenn brought her back and he hasn't bothered to go out of his way to introduce himself to her ever since he got back. He'd meet her soon enough and he wasn't hoping to make friends with her. The more people he managed to keep at arm's length, the better.

“Yo, Daryl. What do you think about the new chick?” a guy called Mitchell asked him, snapping him from his thoughts.

Daryl shrugged. “Ain't met her yet,” he replied, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Okay, but have you seen her?” another guy called Ronnie asked. “I'm telling you, man, hotter than the sun on a summer day. I'm hoping she'll let me hit at least once.”

“How 'bout ya leave the poor girl alone?” Daryl snapped, turning to face the group that was walking with him. “She ain't even been here two days and y'all are already ogling her like she's some prize to be won. Have some more respect.”

“Jeez,” Mitchell whistled. “What's got your panties up in a bunch?”

“Nothin',” Daryl muttered angrily, turning around to walk further into the cellblock. “Jus' wanna get this fuckin' job done and all y'all can do is yap 'bout some girl ya dun' even know properly. I dun' give two flyin' shits 'bout who or wha' ya talk 'bout, but do it after the job's done. Y'all ain't free loadin' here. Do yer job, earn yer keep.”

“Sorry,” a girl called Ariana muttered, sending him an apologetic look. “What do you need us to do?”

“Take those planks over there and take em to the guard tower. Rick wants to fortify it and wants it done by the end of the week.”

“What are you gonna do?” Ronnie asked, crossing his arms as he sized Daryl up.

Daryl glared at him and squared his shoulders, looking down on his shorter, scrawny frame. “Hershel needs help with somethin'. I believe ya can understand tha' if the doctor needs somethin' done, it's considered top priority?”

Ronnie shrunk under Daryl's intense glare, nodding quickly. “Yeah, of course.”

“Great.”

With that, Daryl turned on his heel and set off to find Hershel. He didn't have to search far, however, because Hershel halted him before he could go outside.

“Daryl, over here,” the old man called after him, halting him in his tracks.

Daryl turned and walked over to Hershel, nodding at him respectfully. “Wha' ya need, Doc?”

“I'm sure you've heard of the girl Carol and Glenn brought back yesterday by now?” Hershel questioned, chuckling at the slight groan Daryl emitted.

“Who hasn't? Apparently she's really good lookin'. Her looks has been all people has to say 'bout her.”

Hershel nodded. “Unfortunately, that is true. Only Rick, Glenn, Carol and myself has had the pleasure of meeting her personally up until this point. She's a lovely woman. Had no problem that there wasn't anything to ease the pain when I had to stitch her side and she's more than willing to get up and start working to earn her keep. She won't be able to for at least another day or so since her side needs to heal up a bit first, but Carol and Glenn did good with bringing her back. She'll fit right in.”

“Good,” Daryl nodded. “She a good fighter?”

“From what I understand, she's been out on her own since the beginning. She's not dead yet, so I'd say she's alright,” Hershel replied, adjusting on his crutches.

“Alrigh', now enough 'bout her. Wha' did ya need me to do?”

Hershel gave him an encouraging pat on the back, confusing the archer. “You're going to be one of the very few people who gets to say they met the new girl for the next couple of days. I was hoping you could help her fix her bunk? One of the legs on the bunk broke and she's dead set on repairing it. She won't let me help because she keeps insisting I've done enough for her, so I told her I would send someone else to help. She'll be expecting you.”

Daryl pursed his lips but nodded, parting ways with the older man. He walked over to the cell that Hershel had pointed towards and stopped at the doorway, hesitating to make his presence known.

You had your back turned towards the door, hunched over as you inspected the leg of the bunk. You weren't aware of the archer that stood a few feet behind you, engrossed entirely in your own thoughts. That was, until he spoke up behind you.

“Hey. Hershel said ya needed help?”

You froze at the voice, willing the supposed hallucination away. You slowly rose to your feet and turned, locking eyes with the one person you've been searching for since the world went to hell—your boyfriend, Daryl Dixon.

The moment Daryl locked eyes with you, a whirlwind of emotions flooded his being. Relief, love, happiness, wonder, sadness, confusion and so much more that he couldn't decipher. Although his first instinct was to wrap you in his arms and never let go of you again, he hesitated, refusing to believe you were real. He took a step back, his eyes wide as he looked at you.

You stared back at him with equal amounts of disbelief. You took a hesitant step forward. “Daryl?” you whispered. The man in front of you looked slightly different; a little bit older and his hair was longer, but there was no mistaking it. The man in front of you was Daryl.

Daryl remained silent, his eyes locked on you as you continued to take agonizingly slow steps towards him. He watched as you stopped in front of him and hesitantly raised your hand, bringing it to rest on his cheek. Daryl instantly melted into your familiar soft touch, and that was all the confirmation he needed. Without another thought, he gently grabbed you and pulled you into his arms, tightly clinging to you as he pressed multiple kisses to the top of your head.

“Yer real,” he whispered, a laugh of amazement falling from his lips. “Yer real. Yer alive. Yer actually still alive.”

You laughed quietly against his chest as you held onto him tightly, never wanting to let go ever again. Your laughter soon turned into sobs, tears of relief and happiness falling from your eyes.

“I thought I'd never see you again,” you whispered through your tears, burying your face into his chest. “I thought you were dead, Dar.”

“'M here,” he whispered into your ear, a few tears of his own falling from his eyes. “'M alive. Yer alive. 'M never lettin' ya go ever again. 'M sorry I ever left tha' day in the first place.”

“It's okay. I'm sorry, too. I never should've asked you to cut Merle out of your life. He's your brother. It was unreasonable of me.”

“Nah, it wasn't,” he denied, placing another gentle kiss on the top of your head. “Ya were jus' lookin' out fer me. I never shoulda gotten mad at ya in the first place.”

“Let bygones be bygones?” you whispered against his chest.

Daryl chuckled before nodding. “Yeah, of course.”

The two of you held onto each other for a couple of moments longer until you pulled back. Daryl was about to voice his protest until you pressed your lips against his in an urgent kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck. His arms settled on your waist, pulling you closer into him as he kissed you back. There was no lustful hunger behind the kiss—there was only love and longing, two broken parts finally reuniting and mending together as one.

Daryl pulled back and placed his forehead against yours, closing his eyes. “I missed ya so much,” he whispered, willing the lump in his throat to go away.

“I missed you too. More than you even know,” you replied, cupping Daryl's cheek with one of your hands. “But I found you. I finally found you.”

Daryl leaned into your touch before turning his head to kiss the palm of your hand. However, he soon pulled away from you and strode over to your bag, slinging it over your shoulder.

“C'mon,” he said, taking your hand in his as he pulled you to walk beside him.

“Where are we going?” you questioned, falling into step beside the man you loved.

“There ain't no need fer ya to sleep in there. Yer gonna sleep with me in my cell,” Daryl said simply, pulling you along to his cell.

You giggled but said nothing, silently following him into his cell. When he placed your bags down on the floor, Daryl placed a soft kiss on your lips before stalking out of the cell.

“Where are you going?” you called after him, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

“'M gonna find tha' prick who objectified ya and teach him a lesson. Yer hot as fuck, yes, that much I can accept people sayin', but Ronnie implied he wanted to sleep with ya outrigh'. He's really gonna regret sayin' tha' in a few moments. Dun' even try to talk me outta it.”

“Hey, Dar?” you called after him, halting him in his tracks. “I love you.”

Daryl smiled at you. “I definitely love ya more.”

[shadow0214]

I've been reading some fanfics with Noa and I love them, so I thought I'd give it a go. It's my first time writing so...don't judge me to hard.

Noa × human OC

Belonging

Always the same thing around the 'bunker', no one told you the things that were happening, you hated that. You felt like they still treated you like a little child even though you were in your twenties already.

"Yes, didn't you know? We're going on an excursion." Samantha said to me while I was drying the dishes after dinner.

"Of course, I didn't, nobody tells me anything around here. It's annoying" You muttered

You were the best tracker they had, you loved being outside, learning the ways of nature, and still nobody ever took you into account when expeditions like this happened.

"Hey, that's enough Sam." A voice said entering the kitchen. "Don't listen to her, she's just trying to get on your nerves"

You looked back and smiled at the comment. Lila always knew how to calm things down.

"Why don't you speak with Anna? Maybe she'll let you go this time." Lila said

"Yes, like every other time I asked her" You scoffed and shook your head.

"C'mon, I'll go with you." Lila pushed

"I don't even own a horse yet." You said

"Well...that's your own fault, Envy could've been yours, you just gave her away to Kiara". Lila reminded you.

Kiara, the daughter of a couple that was part of the council, the leaders of your group. She was like a little sister to you ever since you met her. You had no family, your dad died on an expedition, most say apes killed him, and your mother died soon after she gave birth to you. Medicine was scarce and trying to make it from scratch was hard, not impossible since you had a lab in the facility but still, sometimes the main components were just to available.

Most expeditions could last for months, trying to find more humans, more medicine, or even mark places where apes had their homes so no one would go near. You had the firearms, but not the manpower to fight them alone.

You never understood the hate your kind had towards the apes, yes, they were now more and had claimed a lot of the land humans once ruled, but they had also healed the land. No humans meant trees and animals were free to repossess what was once theirs, and apes were not using human machines that harm the earth, so everything had regained its balance in a way. Since you were little, you went out of the bunker with a horse, you learned how to fish, how to hunt, how to track and look for things outside, you never understood why you felt more connected to nature than to your own people. 'They never understood' you'd think. ‘They will never see the world as I see it'.

Anyway, all of that wasn't going to change, so you had to take what was given to you and make the most out of it. Lila and you went to Ana, she was distracted with the preparations for the expedition. This time, from what Lila had told you, they were going to look for more survivors and other bunkers to see if those had more medicine.

"Ana, mind if we talk to you for a moment?" Lila asked

"What? Yeah, sure. What's up?" Ana said absent-mindedly while she tripled checked the supplies. It looked like they were going for some months at least.

Lila looked at you and pushed you softly, and nodded at you when you looked back. You took a deep breath and spoke.

"So...Ana, I heard about the expedition and I wanted to know why you hadn’t called for me? You know I'm one of the best people to take in things like that. I can survive pretty well on my own while I'm outside."

Ana sighed and stopped what she was doing.

"Y/N, you know the reason, I need you here, protecting everyone else" She said while putting her hands on your shoulders

"No one ever comes close to this place since we put the electric fence around! Let me go!"

"Y/N" Lila spat at me. "Careful with your words!"

I just stared at her with anger.

"You have absolutely no good reason to not let me go. Please, I can really help if something goes wrong!"

Ana didn't have a comeback for that, she knew what you were saying was right, she knew how helpfull you could be, and still the promise she had made to your mother drilled into her head could not allow you to go with them. You were already in your twenties, now there was no good excuse to tell you to stay and Ana knew this. She sighed again and with a very sad tone agreed to your request. You were going with them, and that was that.

----------‐-----------------

-The next morning-

Ana and Aaron, parents of Kiara, were the ones in charge of this expedition. Samantha, Lila, Carlos, Seth (Samantha's uncle), and you were the rest of the group.

You went to get your stuff ready on Envy, the mare that was meant to be yours, but for some reason you had decided to give her to Kiara, still, she thought of Envy as a shared horse more than her own. Kiar knew how much you loved her, and she didn't mind giving her to you in times like this.

"Take care of each other, ride safely." Kiara said with a smile on her face while petting the side of the mare.

"We will, sis, we'll be back before you know it. Anything special you want me to look for?"

Kiara shook her head. " I just need you to come back to me, that's it."

"Aaww dear, of course I will." You said hugging little Kiara.

You loved her, she was the only one that understood you and never judged you. One day you were going to take her exploring with you, so you could show her everything you loved.

Two weeks passed. Everyone was a little on edge since the news of contact had gotten to you. Apparently, a week ago the satellites started working again and your walkie-talkies that you carried mostly just to feel like you were connected somehow started working again. The people on the bunker told Ana and Aaron that a girl, similar age to you and Lila, had found the missing piece to get satellite connection back on. We knew about the bunker on the east but we had little contact with them and the nomads that were looking for ways to communicate with each other had been murder by a big group of apes, but apparently one of the girls of the nomad group had survived and, with the help of some apes, was able to get to where the main computers where locked and retrieve de disc.

This news had everyone in our group freaked out, it had been a long time since we had been able to communicate over long distances. Some were happy about it, they were thinking that this way we were going to able to rebuilt what was ours, but others were weary of what other humans wanted. 'Humans are selfish and will do anything to get power' Others thought.

Our group tried to maintain calm during all this, we still had to find supplies and medicine that was not going to arrive even if we had connection with other humans. More people meant more food, more space needed and more medicine that we did not have to spare.

At night everyone was silently eating what you had hunted for the day. You were pretty good at using different weapons, but your favorite was the bow and arrow, you almost never missed unless you wanted to. The others had guns, and some knives with them, but most of them knew that using guns out hear meant that everything in a 1km radius or more could hear and pinpoint our location.

"We could've been eating earlier if we had used my gun, I never miss" Samantha spoke showing a cocky grin to you.

You just rolled your eyes at her.

"If we had done your way, every single ape around here would've come looking for us." Seth said calmingly.

Samantha hated it when he agreed with your methods, and you knew it; in a way, it made you proud when he did. He would always be om Samantha's side and agree with her, he never liked agreeing with you, but sometimes he just had to.

"You should be thanking Y/N for her quick thinking. Otherwise, we would've had to eat the dried-up food we brought, and I don't think anybody wanted more of that" Ana said laughing at the end. The rest of the group followed making faces of disgust and laughing at the comment of our leader.

"How long until we get to the big buildings?" Lila asked when everyone had calmed down

"Sadly, I think we'll have to go back. Ana and I have been thinking about it and it's better to be with everyone else at the moment." Aaron answered

"Uncertain times call for unity." Ana added

Seth nodded and kept eating.

You were thinking. The group needed medicine, and other things...maybe a tiny group could keep pushing forward while the adults went back.

"And what if some of us stayed? You said it yourself Aaron, we are a week away from the buildings and we need everything we can find over there. A small group will not be noticed as easily as all of us" you said.

You had a point, and they knew it. After some discussion, the leaders agreed, Lila and you could keep going, the rest was to go back with them. Samantha was going to disagree, but she knew better than to stay with you two. Lila and you were inseparable, and Samantha would only be outnumbered in any decision you made.

The next morning everyone gave you half of their rations for food since you two were going to need them more than them, and then they set off for the bunker.

Lila and you waved at them, and then kept going.

For some time, it was quiet between you two, but Lila was not going to let that be.

"Sooo, wanna race?" Lila said with a sparkle in her eyes.

You knew what that meant. The idea was in her mind, now you could only accept the challenge.

"I mean...It's kind of unfair. Char is not meant for sprinting" you said with a grin.

"And Envy is?" Lila replied

"Oh, I know she's faster that Char." You said, knowing full well that she was fast in short distances and Lila was thinking more of a long-distance race.

"Well, then start! See you at the end!" Lila said kicking softly the side of her mare that sprinted away.

"Hey no fair!" You yelled doing the same with Envy.

You passed trees and creeks so fast you felt like you were going to fall off the horse. Impressively you were just behind Lila and Char, who was galloping with all her might.

You were so enthralled by how fast Char was going that you barely missed a branch that could've hit you down.

Eventually Lila made Char stop. You kept going, but Lila screamed at you to stop.

"What? I thought we were going to end?" You said out of breath riding back to where they were.

"Look up" She said, almost like a whisper.

You did and saw tall buildings in front of you all covered in vines and trees. The trees had broken some of the sediments of the building but were also holding them up. Most of them were broken, and some had collapsed, probably by the sheer size of them.

"Wow, they are amazing" Lila said.

There were rows of them, all conquered back by nature itself. It was beautiful to see how two completely opposite things could come together to create art. All green and grey together forming structures that you had never seen before.

You were both still gawking at the immensity of the buildings when you heard a noise up in the sky. Eagles, huge and magnificent eagles. You had seen some flying around on your own little excursions, but now they were closer than ever.

"Should we follow them?" Lila whispered, this was unknown territory to her, this was more your area of interest.

"Mmm maybe for a while just to see where they take us." You said firmly. " We can also walk and get in some of these buildings to see if we find something" You added.

Lila nodded and dismounted Char, you followed suit. Both of you took the reins of each mare and pulled gently so they kept up with the pace you set.

Three days you walked and searched for supplies with no luck. You tried entering every building you could, but some of them where to destroy to even walk on the floor. Others had entrances that were too high for either of you to climb, and if you did climb the hard part later was going down.

"Thank goodness you came prepared, Y/N." Lila said, struggling while climbing down a rope.

"Don't mention it, just keep going we're almost at the bottom" You said short of breath. You were no stranger to climbing but doing it almost every day for 3 days was taking its toll on you.

Lila let go of the rope and landed on the ground huffing.

"We can't keep doing this, Y/N. It's too tiring. We aren't apes to be climbing around without a care in the world!"

"I know I know, but we've found some good stuff nonetheless" You said as you stretched out after jumping off the rope, you went back and pulled the rope 2 times so it could fall off the makeshift hook you had made to tie it up.

"Some expired painkillers and a bunch of gardening tools is NOT good stuff!"

Lila sighed, even though you’d a nice time sharing this little adventure together you were starting to feel hopeless. Maybe it was time to go back, maybe the others had gotten supplies from the other camp, and you were doing nothing out here but waste time.

"Lila…you can go you know?" You said softly cleaning some arrows that you had used to hunt rabbits earlier.

"What? And leave you here?? Are you insane?!"

"No… I just feel like my time here is not over yet. Yours though…"

"Nu uh, I'm not leaving you alone, we don't even know where exactly we are."

"It's my decision Lila"

"Bullshit! I know you love nature and such, but everyone is waiting for us!"

"Everyone?" You said lowering your head.

Lila didn't answer, she knew that most of the people treated you like an outsider. No one ever told her why, the only reason she could think of wad that you had no family left alive, but that was a cruel way of treating your own kind.

"Fine, I'll take what we found back. What do you expect me to say to the rest when you don't arrive with me huh?" Lila asked

"You tell them half the truth, that I simply didn't want to come back"

"That's the 'half-truth' to you?"

"Ok ok," you said rolling your eyes. " Tell them you begged me to go back, and I said I would keep looking for stuff for a couple more days, then you never met again with me"

"Mmm, alright. So, you got killed?"

"What?! No! Idiot" You said pushing her playfully. Lila just chuckled.

"I'm gonna miss you (Y/nickname)." Lila sniffled while hugging you.

You hugged her back with some tears in your eyes.

"I'll be back before you know it, I promise"

Lila waved goodbye to you while riding Char out of the jungle of buildings, you waved back until you couldn't see her anymore.

After that you kept searching for anything really for a couple of days, until one day the promises you had made to Lila and Kiara were going to be broken.

–----------------------------------------

One day while you were scavenging around in a building you heard noises, noises you hadn't heard before. You took Envy and hid her next to some bushes at the side of a building and tried to keep her relaxed.

As the noise came closer it became clearer: apes.

You never really had contact with them since you were always cradled inside the bunker. The only experience you had was the stories people would tell you, but once you started growing up you stopped believing everything the adults told you.

You were a little apprehensive about the situation at hand but as long as Envy obeyed you, you were sure the apes would pass as quickly as they came.

"You only try to show off when climbing, the other things you just avoid!" A female voice said

"Not true! Anaya never avoids challenges, right Noa?" A male voiced reply

'Anaya and Noa' you made a mental note of the names, not sure why. You heard them walking away so you went out of your hiding place little by little, looking around you just in case you needed to hide from them.

From where you were you could see 3 apes; one had an armband different than the other two. You felt bad spying on them, but your curiosity got the best of you. You kept listening in the conversation, but you also noticed they would sign sometimes and that got lost in translation. The only signs you knew were tactical warfare signs that Aaron had thaught you when you were learning about weapons with Lila and Samantha.

"Soona is right, Anaya always showing off then running away when something goes wrong" The third one spoke, another male. After that the three started making a noise that you could only compare to laugh.

"I'll show you, climb to top to see sunset. First one wins!" The other male said running in all fours and starting to climb the building in front of you with ease.

"Anaya wait!" The female voice shouted but followed right behind him.

The other male chuckled and followed his friends up the building.

You were mesmerized by how athletic and big they were, but something inside you also wanted to follow them so you could see at least one sunset. The past days you've had missed all of them because of the tall canopy, but not today. The renewed strength gave you confidence that you could climb to the top of the building you were hiding behind.

You took your trusty rope and, your bow and some arrows just in case they attacked you and started climbing up. The building that you had chosen was in pretty good state, it still had most of its stairs and you didn't have to jump too far from one part of some broken stairs to another, which would also be handy when climbing down.

About 3 floors from getting to the top, you encountered the biggest problem: no more stairs. They were all broken or looked very unstable, your best option to climb up was the outside of the building. The design made it look like a stair, and if you went a little bit over the edge that was keeping you from falling you could see a metal hook thingy in which you could tie a rope to climb down.

First you made a knot at the end of the rope with just enough space to insert it in the hook, after that you threw that end of the rope with just enough strength to get it to where you needed it. It took you 3 attempts, but eventually you made it and started climbing the rope. Your hands were already tired from days before, but the view would make it all worth it.

Eventually when you were halfway through something made a weird noise. At first you didn't pay much attention to it but then y sounded again and this time you felt the rope moving. The hook couldn't withstand your weight anymore, and you could feel it just pulling down.

You tried to keep taking deep breaths but that was not working, they were faster than before.

*crack*

You looked up and saw the rope sliding off the hook even farther than before, that was when you started panicking. Your breathing wasn't steady anymore and now you were seconds away from falling from the almost top of the building.

A piece of the building where the hook was gave up and you let go of the rope for milliseconds and eventually grabbed the rope but it burned because of the friction, and you screamed in pain.

Noa and his friends, who were happily watching the sunset, looked at each other when you screamed. The three of them looked around for the thing that had made such a horrible sound but couldn't see anything.

You tried climbing up again, but now your hands were bloody from the fall, and you were slipping from the rope. You were in agony.

"Please, not like this, I can't die like this" You said to yourself trying to reassure yourself that you were not going to die.

That's when Noa heard you and looked over the building, he signaled his friends to jump to the other building.

"She will die if we don't help," Soona said with worry.

" What do we do?" Anaya asked Noa.

Noa went to were the rope was tied.

"Please don't kill me!" You shouted, looking up seeing one of the apes.

Noa frowned his face but kept trying to pull you up.

You understood then he was trying to help, but you knew the extra weight on the now unstable floor was not going to help.

"No, let go! You'll make it worse!" You tried to explain with tears rolling down your face. You couldn't stand the pain anymore.

Eventually the rope itself started tearing up, you were about 15 meters from the ground, you knew it was unlikely to survive that fall, your only hope was now with the 3 apes that were trying to help.

You saw the male ape trying, again, to pull you up, but it was useless with the rope tearing, and that's when it happened.

The rope tore apart, and you started to fall, your only hope for surviving was the trees below you would cushion your fall enough for you not to die. The only thing you were able to come up with was using your left arm to cover your neck as best you could.

Silence. Silence followed after your fall. Anaya was the first one to get to you and he poked you with a stick.

Soona quickly took the stick from him and went to check if you were still alive. She saw that you were still breathing thankfully. But your left forearm was completely broken.

"What happens now?" Soona asked Noa.

Noa was not sure what to do, his instincts told him to leave you there to die, after all, you were Echo. You would only mean problems to the clan, but there was another part of him that felt responsible for you and wanted to help you out.

"We take her home, help her wounds. After that, she has to leave." Noa said to Soona.

Soona nodded and took your frail body, and the three friends started their journey back home, back to Eagle Clan.

[forever-rogue]

Hi Bee🐝 I hope you’re having a nice weekend❣️

I had a Joel fic idea I wanted to send you in case you are looking for inspo? If not just ignore this lmao.

I thought it would be kind of cute to have a fic where r likes to read even after the world went to hell and whenever she goes with Joel somewhere and he luckily finds a book he knows she hasn’t read he picks it up for her as a gift😭 and r reads out loud for them when they’re camping, oblivious to Joel’s feelings until one day he gives r a book she mentioned she loved when she was younger and she’s like oh, you feel the same way 😭

AN | I love this, this is so soft and I love this concept! I hope you like it too 🥰

Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings | None

Word Count | 3k

Masterlist | Joel, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"Always buried in a book," his tease was accompanied by a warm chuckle as you looked up and found Joel strolling into the makeshift library. Your smile was beaming as you marked your page and set the book down to give him your full attention, "what are you readin' now?"

"Nothing terribly exciting," you confessed with a huff, nodding in the direction of your latest selection, "the Hobbit. I think I've read it a dozen times by now. As a matter of fact I think I've read all of these books at least twice."

"Hard to expand a library when people aren't writing anymore," Joel rubbed at his beard thoughtfully as you nodded sadly, "its a shame."

"I never thought I'd see the day when I couldn't go to the bookstore or library for a new book," you looked away, blinking back your tears. It wasn't just the book thing - it was everything, "but here we are. I like to write my own stories sometimes but it's not the same. I already know the beginning, middle, and end and all the plot twists when it's all in my head."

He hummed in understanding as you felt him study you intently. Your face warmed up under his intense gaze as tugged at a loose thread on the sleeve of your sweater, “is there a reason you read the same thing multiple times?”

“I’ve always read a lot,” you tucked your legs up and under yourself on the overstuffed chair. You focused on the fire that was crackling away merrily, knowing that you had his undivided attention, “it was always a good form of escapism when I was younger and turns out it also works these days with all of…this. I didn’t have a lot of friends growing up, I always had a hard time fitting in. When things got bad, there was always a book to turn to.”

“Did you have a favorite?” you huffed in amusement as you turned to him with a no duh expression. The look on your face made him laugh as well, and he reached over to give your shoulder a gentle squeeze, “what was it?”

“You’re going to laugh…”

“I promise I won’t,” he insisted, accompanied by a silent shake of his shoulders which led you to raise your eyebrows at him, “I’ll do my best not to.”

“A true man of honor,” you rested your chin in your hand as you looked over at him, “prideandprejudice.”

“Come again?” he was teasing you, the question filled with tender affection, “didn’t quite catch that, sweetheart.”

“You’re the worst,” you groaned softly, hiding your face in your hands, “you heard me loud and clear - Pride and Prejudice. I know it’s silly but I’ve just always loved it.”

“I don’t think that’s silly at all,” he promised as you relaxed slightly. It wasn’t that you needed his approval or hoped he felt the same way, but there was something about his response and how tenderly he watched you that it made your tummy explode with butterflies, “it’s nice to have something familiar to hang onto - it’s nice to have a friend.”

“I agree,” oh. He really had to stop looking at you like that before you melted into a puddle on the floor, “I haven’t read it in forever.”

“Haven’t found a copy or just haven’t had the desire to read it?”

“Haven’t found it,” you sighed dramatically, before smiling back at him, “maybe one day I will, and if I do, I’m going to make you read it as well - I’ll even read it out loud for you.”

“Is that a promise or a threat?”

“Umm…I dunno,” you mused as he shook his head fondly, “both? Which one is worse?”

“I don’t think I’d ever feel threatened by you,” he began as you gave him a mock-hurt little expression, “you’re very tough, but I’m sorry sweetheart, you’re too soft. Which isn’t a bad thing. So, tell you what, you ever get your hands on a copy of Pride and Prejudice, I’d love to have you read it out loud for me.”

“Yeah?” you looked at him with soft doe eyes that made his heart constrict.

“Promise.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Joel liked your smile; it was pretty, even if you shied away from it at times. It always worked to make his heart constrict with emotion, and he’d long formed his own little plan to make you smile as often as he could. You weren’t privy to that just yet, but that was okay. As long as you were happy that was all that mattered. 

His favorite way, as he’d found after that afternoon in the library, was surprising you with a new book. Realistically, it wasn’t much, but it was the meaning behind the gesture, and the fact that even though he was out in the big, bad outside, he was thinking about you. 

Book after book he found for you, some almost new, perfectly preserved in time, and some already aged and loved before everything fell apart. But it never mattered, it was all about the face that he did just for you. The old, rickety bookcase in your small apartment was soon filled with new titles, some you’d already and others you’d never even heard of, all lovingly placed and organized. One of the many reasons you didn’t mind these small tokens of affection from Joel was the fact that it gave you more reasons to spend time with him.

As the months passed, you got to know Joel more and more, learning about his life from before the Outbreak to present. You shared just as much with him and in a way it felt like the two of you had always been friends, like two wandering souls that had found their way back to each other. You never would have thought that someone like him would ever even want to spend time with you, but you fit together like perfect puzzle pieces. 

On this particular evening you found yourself in his backyard, along with Ellie and a few other friends that you’d made in Jackson. Some moonshine had been passed around, and lots of exciting stories had been exchanged. You were listening to everyone, mostly staying more on the quiet side when you realized you didn’t have much to contribute to the current conversation at hand. 

“What about you?” Joel was sitting on your side and leaned into your space, gently nudging your leg with his. You blinked a few times, tearing your attention away from the fire and turning it to him with a confused look on your face, “what’s your best camping story?”

“Oh,” you grinned sheepishly as you looked around the circle and found nothing but friendly faces looking back at you. Your cheeks warmed up as you shrugged innocently, “I’ve never actually been camping. So I wouldn’t know….unfortunately.”

“What?” Joel seemed surprised but quickly caught himself and slipped into the soft tone that he often adopted for you, “I knew there had to be something wrong with you - there had to be a flaw somewhere.”

“And never having been camping is my flaw?” you teased right back, unaware of the knowing smiles that were being exchanged all around.

“That’s right,” he insisted, leaning in even closer, causing your heart to skip a few beats, “but don’t worry, there will still be time to fix that.”

“What a gentleman,” you down the rest of your drink, shaking your head in amusement.

“Would you look at the time…” Ellie almost jumped out of her seat, pointedly looking around the circle and motioning with her head that it was time to leave, “it’s late and we’re all tired, so we’re gonna…go.”

“All of you at once?” Joel raised an eyebrow as he looked at the girl, knowing better than anything by this point. She nodded with narrowed eyes as everyone said their goodbyes, leaving just the two of you. Joel let out a long sigh as he leaned back in his chair and smiled at you, “very subtle.”

Your mind started to reel with possibilities as to what he meant. You knew what you wanted him to mean, but you also weren’t about to flatter yourself like that. Joel wouldn’t ever like you as more than a friend, right? Right. 

The way you looked at him with such wide, gentle eyes made him want to pull you into his lap and kiss you until there was no mistaking what he was saying. The two of you stared at each other for a few moments before you cleared your throat softly.

"I guess I should get going too," you whispered, still unmoving, "it's late."

As soon as you stood up but before you could go, you felt his fingers wrap around your wrist as he gently held you back.

You turned around to face him, neither of you speaking, just studying each other. He had lovely eyes, soft despite all the years of hardness, his lips pulled into a soft smile.

Before you could stop yourself with too much logic, you leaned in and kissed him. You wondered if it was all a huge mistake, but to your surprise, he kissed you right back. His hands found purchase on your waist and yours on his shoulders as you let him kiss you 

Until you came to your senses and realized what you were doing. You gasped in surprise and pulled back, looking at him worriedly as Joel dropped his hands from your waist. You blinked back the tears that had immediately threatened to well up, panicking that you had crossed any remaining boundaries that either of you had remaining.

"I-I am so sorry," you whispered, touching your lips without thinking about it, "I have to go. I'm sorry."

You were gone before Joel could even process what had just happened. 

When he did, he hung his head and sighed heavily. He hoped he hadn't just fucked everything up.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

In the following week, you weren’t actively trying to avoid Joel…but you were definitely making sure you weren’t around whenever he was. You just had no idea how to broach the subject or if it even needed to be discussed. The idea of going up to him and saying anything made you want to curl up and wither away - it might have been dramatic  but you were willing to allow yourself a little bit of theatrics. 

But…you realized later on, Joel hadn’t fought off your advances. He’d actively kissed you back, and taken control. Maybe he’d wanted it just as much as you had. Or, or, you’d taken advantage of him, because you’d both been drinking. That made it all worse, and made your stomach churn. 

Either way, your plan was to avoid him - if not forever - for as long as you could.

Unfortunately, Joel was a stubborn man and wasn’t about to let you go without any explanations. And you weren’t exactly particularly sneaky; he found you in your usual spot, perched on the window seat with a book open in your lap as you stared out the window. 

“Hey,” you startled at the sound of his voice, but turned to him with a shy smile. He approached you slowly, almost as if he was afraid that he was going to scare you off like some sort of wild animal, “figured you’d be here.”

“Well,” you waved your hands around dismally before tucked your book away, “I’m not exactly hard to find if you know me. I’m a creature of habit.”

“Ain’t nothing wrong with that,” he came over and leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his broad chest, “I have a surprise for you.”

“O-oh, Joel,” you swallowed thickly and wondered what on earth he could possibly be referring to, “I-I don’t need anything…seriously.”

“I didn’t get you anything technically,” ah. Joel and his little technicalities, “more of a ‘we’re doing this,’ type of thing.”

“And what is it that we’re doing?”

“Camping,” he stated with a grin as you just blinked at him in shock.

“Pardon?”

“We - you, Ellie, and I - are going camping,” he stated again as if that would clear everything up, “just a little something I’ve been planning since you’ve been avoiding me.”

“I-I have not been avoiding you,” a lie. You both knew that much, “just…busy.”

“Whatever the reason,” he insisted, “we’re goin’ camping. We’re leaving bright and early in the morning so make sure your things are packed.”

“Joel-”

“We’ll be ‘round at eight,” he gave your leg a gentle pat before heading out, not letting you get a word in edgewise. This man.

You watched him go, feeling so alive and nervous at the same time, but more importantly, you were excited to go.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

As it turned out, camping was a lot more fun than you thought it would be. You were pretty sure a lot of it had to do with your present company. Ellie and Joel were always fun to be around and this was no exception.

Joel had scouted out a remote but safe location near a river where you made camp. There was something rewarding about putting up your own tent and making a fire to cook your dinner on. It was definitely a welcome change; it almost made it seem like the world had never fallen apart. 

One particular evening, Ellie had crashed early and was already in the tent sleeping. That felt you and Joel outside sitting next to the fire. When the conversation hit a natural lull, Joel stood up and walked over to his backpack. You watched him curiously, a smile dancing on your face.

"Close your eyes," he called back to you. You playfully closed your eyes and put your hands over him. He chuckled as he pulled something out of the pack before zipping it closed.

He made his way back over to you, gently placing something in your lap. You made a small sound of surprise but didn't dare to open your eyes. Instead, you waited for him to give you the go ahead.

He sat back down next to you, groaning slightly at his stiff bones. You felt him pull your hands away from your eyes, "alright, you can go ahead and open your eyes."

"Joel, you really didn't need to get me anything!" You gasped as you looked at the object in your lap, trying to hide back a squeal of delight, "Joel. This is amazing."

"You like it?" He asked, nervous as he watched you inspect the small object. 

"Pride and Prejudice," you opened the cover and flicked through some of the gold leafed pages. It was still in impeccable condition, "oh my god, I can't believe you found this - you remembered."

“‘course I did,” any nerves he had remaining quickly dissipated when he saw the look of pure joy on your face, “I remember a lot of things.”

“I mentioned it like one time,” you flipped through some of the pages, touching your fingers over the worn but love pages, “I can’t…this is wonderful, a-and so kind. Thank you so much, Joel.”

“You mentioned how much you used to like it,” oh no. He felt like he could melt into a puddle at how sweet you were, “and I wanted you to have it again. So I’ve been keeping my eye out for it.”

“You’ve been looking for it?” alright, you were about ready to cry at that point. He nodded, trying to make it seem like less of a big deal than it actually was, “you’re amazing. I can’t…this is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me.”

“It’s not that big of a thing-”

“It’s everything,” you clutched the book to your chest, “this means everything to me.”

“You mean everything to me,” his voice was gentle. You gasp inwardly at the revelation, “I thought it was only fitting.”

You moved closer to him on the log, shifting your body so you could face him. Your eyes locked onto his; he could see the hesitation on your face and in your body language. He decided to answer your silent question by putting his hand on your face, brushing his thumb over your cheek. 

Joel leaned in and kissed you, so quickly and delicately that you were almost convinced you might have imagined it. Judging from the expression on his face, you knew that it had definitely happened. You hadn’t just dreamed it last time - he wanted this too. You leaned into him and pressed a few more kisses to his lips, the two of you lingered but neither of you pushing. 

“There’s something I have to ask you,” he tucked a few stray locks of hair behind your hair as you felt your face grow warm again. The effect he had on you was palpable. 

“Anything.”

“Will you read to me?” the way the smile on your face was intoxicating and Joel was hooked, “I’ve never read Pride and Prejudice.”

“Shocker,” you teased softly, “are you sure though?”

“Positive,” he promised as he took your hand and led you over to the nest of warm blankets that were near the fire, “nothing would make me happier.”

“Okay,” you made yourself comfortable and pulled out the book, “get comfy and let’s get started.”

“Okay.”

[itsmemuffy]

When I published my first post, wanted to keep the momentum going. It was my goal to post weekly and well.... it's been two weeks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I abandoned all my little drabbles to focus on a full-length fic that is becoming waaay longer than I anticipated. Thought I'd post a little WIP Wednesday to make sure I don't go back into the ether. Can't wait to have this one finished, I've been having a lot of fun writing it.

Contents: Original Trilogy! Logan x fem reader, naive reader, obsessive Logan, suggestive content, Charles makes an appearance

Summary: You keep everything running as smooth as possible in the background while Professor Xavier keeps a very full plate of locating mutants, running the school, and leading the X-Men. A steady stream of mutants come and go through the mansion, but a certain one in particular makes it his mission to nestle his way into your life.

The past few days had been a whirlwind for Logan. He's the type of man that goes where he wants to go- and waking up in an infirmary on a small hospital cot after being round up like some sort of animal was not on his list of things to do that week, to say the least.

For all intents and purposes, his next plan of action was to get away from here as soon as he possibly could and get back to the life he lived on his own terms. His only home and form of transportation was totalled somewhere in the Alaskan wilderness, sure, but he already had experience starting over from nothing.

When he first met you, a cute little thing diligently running errands to what was perhaps the one man who could have his answers, you immediately piqued Logan's interest. So sweet and so kind, and Charles put his trust in you?

He had barged in like he owned the place on you and the professor scheduling out the upcoming semester in his office. Charles appeared to have already gotten used to this type behavior from him. "This, my dear, is Logan. He will hopefully be joining us now."

Oh... so is he planning to stick around? You ponder as you bite the inside of your cheek, leaning onto Charles' desk with your hip. Logan immediately came off as brooding and dismissive, and he didn't seem like the type to settle into a place beaming with so much activity. Regardless, you extended your hand out to him as you told him your name.

It took him a second to register the gesture. He only now noticed how lost in thought he was, eyes caught below your neckline. With a clearing of his throat, Logan reached a hand back to you to shake it. The most formal of ways to greet someone, yet the feeling of your delicate fingers grasping his rough palm caused his mind to wander again. He forced himself back to reality.

"I guess I'll be seeing you around" Logan remained aloof in speech, hoping you didn't notice the way he devoured you with his gaze. He decided to promptly remove himself from the room, searching for the privacy to be alone with his thoughts.

A few interactions after your initial introduction, Logan started to feel something beyond sexual curiosity. You made his heart race, you made him nervous.

Not a single detail went unnoticed by Logan. The way your hips would sway, how you parted your hair, the lipstick you wore, the softness in your voice whenever you greeted him, your scent.

Life kept throwing change in Logan's way, morphing his way of living into something unrecognizable to him. For the last however many years (boy, is he ever bad at keeping track of time) he had filled them with isolation and taking whatever cheap pleasures he could find. Now he finds himself surrendering the space in his mind to a woman he barely knew. You brought warmth and light into a cold, dark place.

No, this wont fly, he thought to himself. The fact that he was losing control over the dynamic between you made him very uncomfortable. Logan made it his mission to learn more about you. If he could just figure you out, he could take the reins over again.

The two of you would always acknowledge eachother in a group setting. The tiny smile Logan would throw your way whenever you caught eyes made you weak. You couldn't help but to want to know more about him too. A rugged man who was a stranger not too long ago was showing you consideration? A man who nobody knows where he's been, what he's done, how old he is? It kind of racked your brain, but you tried not to let it trip you up.

Oh, but he would catch you trip up. It wasn't lost on Logan the times you entered a space with him in it, seemingly to forget what you came in there for. Maybe you were a little ditzy- your mind often racing too fast that you couldn't catch up with yourself, but it had happened too many times for it to be a coincidence. At least, that's what he told himself.

He replicated your behavior, scouting you out amongst the mansion. It wasn't hard for him to find you. Your trail had become so much bolder to his senses, overshadowing anybody else that could be in vicinity.

Logan always found what he was looking for. Excuse after excuse slipped easily from his lips. Obvious to everyone else what he was doing, you earnestly took the bait every time without fail. He marked the first time he had a conversation with you alone as a significant victory.

"Hey, didn't see you there. Have you seen Charles around? I need to talk to him." He had cornered you in the library, watching you read for a minute or two before making his presence known.

You flinched up in your chair, "Jesus Logan, don't sneak up on me like that!" The yelp that initially left your lips was definitely a sound he would remember next time he's alone.

"Sorry, doll. Didn't mean to scare ya," he chuckled.

The upset you felt towards him for breaking your flow state lasted but half a second. You couldn't be mad. After all, whatever he needed Charles for must of been important.

"No, Jean and him are off chaperoning a field trip in the city. He should be back sometime this evening."

Logan let out a little "hmph", trying his best sound to sound disappointed. Inside he was estatic he finally caught up to you again. Now with no one else around, his mind flooded with possibilities on how this could go. The odds of you immediately throwing yourself at him weren't zero, were they? If he were to take you and bend you over the table right this very second, there was a possiblility you'd let him... right? God, am I really this desperate? he thought.

After letting a moment hang in the air, he sat down next to you in the ajacet seat. "So, what are you doing here all by yourself? Got nothing better to do on a Saturday afternoon, huh?" Good idea, Logan, change the subject.

"You're one to talk," your focus was now one hundred percent on him. Thighs spread as he lazily leaned back in the chair, rolling his head ro the side. To say he wasn't beautiful like this would be a lie. You've rarely seen him this relaxed. "Aren't you here too?"

"Huh." Logan did not anticipate you to call him out like that, "I guess you've got a point."

An awkward silence sat between the two of you. You pretended to divert your attention back to your book, not letting him escape the corner of your eye. Logan lit up a cigar he fished from his pocket. He desperately needed something to do with his hands.

"This is a library, you know that right?" You chide him after an annoyed sigh.

"Oh, is it now? I thought all these books were just for decoration." His lips sucked in another drag.

"Very expensive books, Logan. There's plenty of perfecly fine places to smoke around here if you just look."

He got up from his seat, "Then why don't you show me around, darlin'? Open my eyes a little." You couldn't quite tell if the pet name was to belittle you or to be affectionate. A hand reached out to bring you to stand. "I'll let you lead the way."

[demodraws0606]

The issues of Eden being the culprit

Look, just ignore the fact that I conceaded the fact that Eden being the culprit made sense not a long while ago (and that I also made a post about it). In all honesty the only reason why I accepted the theory was mainly because at the time, Eden was the one who had the most evidence stacked against her + the idea of her doing this with an accompliced solved most of the issues I had.

Now however with any thoughts of accomplices throughouly gutted mainly because I really just don't think Whit is involved in the murder anymore (even if he's overwhelmingly suspicious for no fucking reason). The idea of Levi helping has also pretty much gone out of the window now, so that would mean Eden couldn't rlly have gotten the help of anybody (and I don't want to entertain ideas that Arei might have allowed Eden to do it cause it makes no sense with Arei's characterization).

With all of that, now multiple holes that I've been willing to ignore kinda seem obvious with how the case is taking shape. So I'm gonna list all the reasons why I think that, right now, Eden being the culprit seems kind of unlikely.

-She would have no knowledge and reason to replicate the murder method used against Ace

Teruko has made it obvious now that the murder of Ace and Arei are connected in their method. Meaning there has to be a link between those two murder and who commited them. However, how would Eden have known exactly how the murder of Ace was commited, the murder mechanism was undone when Teruko and Eden both walked in. Even if you use the argument that "well Teruko noticed so maybe Eden did !" that would still leave the question as to why Eden would even try and commit a murder that's similar to the way Ace was almost murdered.

-She doesn't have the ability to get the water required for the murder

This one is the most obvious, unless she has someone who helped her, Eden couldn't have gotten the water. This was fine when Eden could potentially have someon working with her however with Arei's revealed talk with David alongside Levi's behavior last episode, I heavily doubt any of them helped Eden. Meaning Eden couldn't have gotten the water.

-The murderer would have no reason to try and circumvant the BDA rule

This one is something I don't hear a lot of people talk about but it's really important. We know that anyone who has witnessed the murder happen does not count for the BDA announcement. Meaning that unless Whit or Eden circumvented that rule, they are ruled innocent by default.

Obviously the wording is vague enough that you could argue the culprit tried to avoid that rule from applying but why ? We already from a lot of signs that the murder was sloppy and almost done last minute, why would the murderer think of such a niche rule. I'd argue this argument of trying to avoid the BDA rule would only work if another culprit was caught because someone was declared innocent by that rule.

-The wording of the note is simply too weird for it to make sense that it was Eden writing it

This is probably the least convincing argument but I still wanted to put this out there.

I understood at first the idea that Eden wrote the note and then just pretended that it wasn't really her handwriting, however isn't it weird how strange the note is worded (ignoring the mispelling).

Why would Eden do this, why couldn't she have just asked Arei to meet her at the playground ? I mean since they were friends now, why would she need lie so much to get Arei's attention ?

Eden could've lied about being threatened but I'd argue it definitely wouldn't be written out like this.

Unless if the culprit isn't Eden and therefore wanted to make 100 pourcent they get Arei's attention by putting everything they overheard into the note. Considering how sloppily the note seems to be written it also would make sense it just sounds like a rehearsed version of what the culprit overheard.

-She couldn't have gotten the Turpentine that was probably used to knock out Arei

This one is the most damning, we know for a fact Arei had to have been knocked out. The floor of the playground is extremely prone to scrapes and marks that any type of resistance would've been made obvious. Obviously I don't think Arei did this willingly because otherwise she wouldn't have had her wrist bound by tape (and also it just makes 0 sense with her character) so this means she had to have been knocked unconcious.

However, Eden had no way to get the turpentine, the attempted murderer of Ace was the one who had it and unless somone wants to try and make the argument that Eden tried to kill Ace, this means that Eden couldn't have gotten a hold of it.

[akookminsupporter]

ARE YOU SURE?!: FITH EPISODE

MY IMPRESSIONS

Preface: This is not an analysis post, and honestly, I don’t want to overanalyse their interactions or everything they said and did—many others are already doing that. My intention with this post is simply to share my thoughts on the episodes, my impressions, and perhaps my conclusions.

I’m writing this as I watch the episodes for the second time.

Jimin should definitely wear more shirts like that because they look incredibly good on him. Honestly, everything he wears looks great, but his outfits in this last episode in Jeju were perfect.

When the maknae line is together, it's easy to see who the oldest is between them hahaha.

One of the main reasons I'd like to go to Korea is for the food, but I've realised they love pork, and I’m not a fan of pork hahaha.

Jungkook really loves eating and cooking. He and I would get along so well.

Jimin and Jungkook really get each other. Like, they understand each other's silly side.

Oh god, Jimin looked incredible. His hair and that shirt, oh god!

All the photos that will be in the photobook coming out are the ones they took with those disposable cameras, right? At least most of them.

Jimin really likes Soju hahaha.

Tae spent almost the whole episode on his phone; I wonder if that was the day his friends arrived in Jeju? He seemed distracted and a bit out of the conversation in general. Or at least that's how it seemed by the way the episode was edited.

Jimin and Jungkook are the kind of... couple who, at a gathering with friends, are in their own little world. When Jungkook started explaining how he finally learned to properly grill pork, his attention was on Jimin, even though Tae was right beside him and was the one who initially congratulated him for it. Jimin, though teasing him, was also encouraging him to keep talking about it, and he was looking at him so fondly, really paying attention to what Jungkook was saying. That reminded me of VB4 when they were walking together, talking about Jungkook’s shoes or something. Something similar happened in VB2, I think.

I love hearing Jungkook speak in satori.

Jimin looks hot drinking beer.

Them caring for the staff will never stop being adorable.

Okay, my tinhat moment of this episode. We all remember Jungkook’s stance on the perilla leaf issue, right? When Jimin said they should give the staff a bite, and he grabbed a perilla leaf, explaining that it already had ssamjang why his expression seemed like he was telling Jungkook, like, “Look, this one’s almost ready, that’s why I’m using it.” I mean, why explain to Jungkook why he chose that perilla leaf? And Jungkook's response... Look, I know being delulu isn’t the solulu, but they don’t help sometimes.

Jimin and Jungkook having this whole conversation while Tae is just there listening is hilarious to watch. That’s why I always say they operate on different frequencies, and that’s what made these episodes so interesting to watch.

Jimin is so funny without even trying.

Wait, did Tae disappear? Where did he go? Oh, AYS editors...

OH, Tae’s back. Where did he go, and when did he come back? Oh, BigHit editors...

It definitely makes sense why Jimin and Jungkook almost always seem to choose to sit across from each other instead of side by side. That way, they can clearly see the silly things the other does to make them laugh and they can talk directly to each other.

Tae asking Jimin if he taught Jungkook the trick—I guess you could call it that—with Soju is kind of interesting. We know Jimin loves Soju, so in part, it makes sense, but I suppose Jimin and Jungkook are known within the group for drinking a lot together, and I imagine they drink a lot of Soju hahaha.

Jimin’s face denying Tae’s question was hilarious and totally contradicted his response hahaha.

They really click.

I don’t know if Jimin says he’s not handsome because he knows he is and is fishing for compliments or if he really believes he’s not, which is a huge lie. Like, someone give that man a mirror!

Jin will always be the WWH of the group hahaha.

It’s curious that even though Jimin and Jungkook aren’t alone, they usually direct themselves or look at each other when they’re talking. It’s like they subconsciously know the other will pay attention no matter what. And I really think they do this unconsciously because there’ve been moments when they say something and another member responds, and they’re surprised as if they just remembered they’re not alone.

Jimin and Jungkook casually talking about enlisting together is so frustratingly so them. It’s even more frustrating that the editors seem to cut certain parts of the conversation and the reactions of the other members. I’d love to know when the other members found out that Jimin and Jungkook were enlisting together. It’s interesting how at the beginning of that conversation, all three of them were involved, but then it was just Jimin and Jungkook talking about it. Even though Tae was there, he was focused on his phone.

I love how Jimin and Jungkook said that, even though it’s common for best friends to end up fighting when they enlist together, that won’t happen to them. They sounded so sure of it, and that says a lot about the level of trust and compatibility between them.

I think they’ve had that conversation more than once. And it makes sense, obviously. Hopefully, they had it in Japan too.

Jimin was traumatised by the hit to his nose that Jungkook gave him while they were sleeping hahaha.

Jimin, I agree, you guys should do another show. You can name it whatever you want; it doesn’t matter hahaha.

Jimin with cats is the cutest thing ever.

Jungkook with dogs is the most energetic thing ever hahaha. Poor cameraman hahaha.

Oh right, they’re singers! Hahahaha

God, these men are handsome.

Jimin, the ladder was right next to you...

I LOVE Jimin’s tattoos, LOVE them.

I’m still impressed by how long they can stay underwater without breathing.

And Jungkook underwater took my breath away.

Okay, the way Jungkook grabbed Jimin’s hair and pulled him to the surface was hot. Not just what he did, but the way it looked. His tattooed arm came out of nowhere, grabbed him, and lifted him to the surface. Christian Grey would be proud of our imagination because we ALL thought the same thing hahaha.

Jungkook is forever teasing Jimin. And Jimin loves that he does it.

Jimin, could you share with the class what 5412 means? Thanks. Jungkook’s wink! They’re too cute.

Jimin and Jungkook are always the last to go to bed.

And its moments like these -them hitting each other with their towels- that remind me they’re men hahaha.

Jungkook waiting by the door for Jimin and immediately saying he should take the bed is so sweet. Jimin immediately refuting that no, he should take the bed is so them. Then Jungkook saying he doesn’t like soft beds, and Jimin comparing the beds to check what Jungkook said is so...

And Tae?

Jimin immediately telling Jungkook he’s hungry after waking up is a MOOD hahaha.

Jimin is so hilariously dramatic.

Morning cuddles!

Bro, after hearing the “alarm” Jimin set for Jungkook, that scene is even funnier. Why are they like this? And you know what’s even funnier? I can totally see Jungkook actually using that alarm.

Did Tae go to exercise? I don’t know, Rick, it seems fake hahaha.

I LOVE Jimin’s tattoos. Especially the ones on his back.

Jungkook is just as dramatic as Jimin hahaha.

Jungkook, babe, you’re not a plant?

Someone give Jimin a YouTube career, please!

Jimin is so gorgeous, oh my god!

I guess Jimin and Jungkook are a bit predictable to the other members hahaha.

Jimin and Jungkook know everything the other is doing even if they’re... asleep hahaha.

Someone tell Jimin he should wear glasses more often and always have that haircut!

Again, it makes sense why Jimin and Jungkook seem to prefer sitting across from each other rather than next to each other. And also, it’s funny how they talk like they’re alone.

Jungkook genuinely loves eating hahaha.

Jungkook sounding so sure it wasn’t ham when Tae said it was, but immediately doubting himself when Jimin said it was, is so funny.

Okay, this part has been discussed quite a bit from what I’ve seen but from a different perspective. Jungkook doesn’t act like a donsaeng with Jimin, and Jimin doesn’t mind. Tae was the one who initially said it was ham they were eating, but Jungkook only reacted to Jimin when they confirmed it wasn’t ham as he said. He didn’t do the same gesture with Tae, only with Jimin. And that’s already common between them. And it says A LOT.

Jimin immediately asking for more food because Jungkook said he wanted more is so sweet. He didn’t question Jungkook about it; he just said, “Do you want more food? Bring more food!” Besides reassuring Jungkook that as long as he was happy eating, everything was fine. Ahh, why have I never had a Jimin in my life?

The way Jimin watched Jungkook eat so fondly...

Jungkook is definitely Gen Z.

The little conversations Jimin and Jungkook have sometimes are so cute. They can talk about anything together, but they almost always tell each other even the smallest things, no matter how simple or impressive, knowing the other will give their full attention no matter what.

MY CONCLUSION ON THE FIFTH EPISODE

Ahh, I enjoyed this episode too. I think it was a bit more balanced, but Jimin and Jungkook really do live in their own world.

It’s obvious how the group’s dynamic changed once Jimin started feeling better. Once that happened, we saw more of what we had seen in the U.S.—the dynamic between Jimin and Jungkook. At times, it was like they were alone, and although I know how that sounds, it’s something typical with them. I remember in my post about the third episode, I mentioned that Jimin and Jungkook sometimes seem to adjust their relationship dynamic when another member is present, but after watching episodes 4 and 5, I think that initial adjustment was because Jimin wasn’t feeling his best. Once he was, they went back to their usual selves.

Tae seemed a bit more absent in this episode, even when he was there. We often saw him engrossed in his phone, and I suppose his friends were in Jeju that day too, so he was a bit distracted by that.

This episode felt like the slowest-paced one in the show so far, though that’s not necessarily a bad thing. One thing I love about AYS is how real it feels. In general, what we’ve seen is what you’d expect or do on a typical holiday with friends. Some days are more exciting than others, but each day has its charm, and each day leaves something to remember for tomorrow. It’s nice that they were able to rest and be lazy at that point in their lives—they deserved it.

Once again, it was clear how similar Jimin and Jungkook are and how well they understand each other. Tae was right; they are twins, though not in the genetic sense—jikookphobics, don’t get too excited.

I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s a bit frustrating how casually Jimin and Jungkook talked about enlisting in the army together, though it was nice that they mentioned being happy to have each other for support.

The episode itself was sweet. It was a calm way to end this part of the series.

I can’t wait for Japan! I thought we’d get the trailer of Sapporo today, but we didn’t—it makes me wonder why. What happened in Japan that they seem to be guarding it so carefully?

If you’ve made it this far, I’m sorry and thank you—I just couldn’t stop writing ajajajajaja.

[spjohnv-blog]

If you're familiar with the South Park Archives, pretty much the only SP fansite still online - there's over eighteen years of history there, pages and renders for tons of characters and locations, thousands of screenshots, a pretty dedicated staff, transcripts of every episode, and so much more. When I made my start writing shitty fanfics, it was a super useful resource, and that was a small chunk of what it is today.

FANDOM has today unveiled a new Offensive Terms Policy which continues a trend in the last few years been suggested in events like Community Connect, where it has previously been suggested wikis avoid references to canonical sex. The avoidance of slurs is something I would be super supportive of generally -- we don't need to see that kind of stuff on Wookiepedia or like, a wiki for Bluey. It'll keep people from vandalizing children's wikis with adult content for kicks. I am generally in favor of content filtering, especially for family-friendly-oriented content.

...but, this is going to cause a lot of problems for the South Park Archives, a show with a major character who frequently uses slurs and is firmly anti-censorship. You don't need to be an editor to think about that. If you're a fan, you know what kind of show we're talking about.

This is a show with episodes called "The Biggest Douche in the Universe", "Major Boobage", "Reverse Cowgirl" and "Titties and Dragons". There are songs like "Fuck the Police" and "Jacking it in San Diego". There is a character called 'Retarded Fish'. The names of these songs and episodes, bear in mind, are legally registered copyrights, not our choices -- how do you change that? Move an article to Episode 1601? What about "Fuck the Police", which isn't even a South Park original song?

You can clean up a synopsis, and formalize language on a character page, I've done both of those things when I was an editor, but you can't undo all of this. How do you?

That's not even getting into the transcripts pages, which are intended to be 100% accurate to the actual dialogue, continuing the tradition from the good ol' South Park Scriptorium...

Within the day of the policy change, FANDOM has already started to make changes to remove slurs from the transcript pages that are unable to be modified as it is directly related to global policy. I don't know that the staff were communicated with about this personally either, but I'm not in the know like I used to be.

No doubt some of this move is prompted by advertisers - FANDOM previously cited advertiser feedback as a motivation for inserting all sorts of videos on top of wiki pages (similar to their later push to include AI-generated content) and understandably many advertisers may not want their brand name mere inches from a discussion of cartoon eight-year-olds using slurs. I mean, shoot, I wouldn't if I were in charge of a major company, and I get someone needs to keep the lights on, but...

I don't know man, it's a shitty position to be in. It's a well-intended policy that I'd support in almost any other context but literally this narrow exception, and I definitely hate the thought of looking like I'd be defending use of offensive terms, but like, how do you cover "everything" about South Park, an explicitly adult show that is so firmly anti-censorship, that builds entire episodes around these kinds of jokes, or even analyze it from a critical perspective, in such a family-friendly, sanitized way, without betraying its spirit and creative intent?

You can imagine how many staff members there are probably scratching their heads or bashing them into lamp posts, trying to figure out what to do or how to move forward after this. They could apply for an exception, but would it even be granted? What would the alternative be? Are restrictions like this worth it or do they render the whole thing moot? How much responsibility lies with FANDOM? Are advertisers forcing the whole internet down this road? There are so many questions in the air on this. I certainly don't have answers.

[galedekarios]

Hey there! You're one of the best Gale-ish devnotes\datamines sources that I know of, so I might as well ask. I remember that at some point Gale mentions taking part in Blackstaff Academy balls (or something like that). Is it mentioned elswhere, and do we have any details on his involvement in such activities? Need that for science\personal lore, and I'd appreciate any info (including EA), if you have time. Thanks!

thank you for your message and i'm sorry for the belated response!

i took my time to comb through everything and sadly, the banter with wyll is the only instance i could find of gale mentioning a ball at blackstaff academy:

gale & the annual blackstaff's ball

gale: i knew you were a graceful man, wyll, but i hear you're quite the dancer too. gale: i've been known to trip the light fantastic myself. mine was a popular hand at the annual blackstaff's ball. wyll: i'd have love to have witnessed it, gale. i wager you are as elegant on the dance floor as you are on the battlefield.

the only other banters i could find that are only loosely related. some give us glimpses into his life at the academy, others into his life in waterdeep.

here's another story about gale & being a young student at blackstaff academy, which triggers in the wizard tower in the underdark:

gale & the death slaad

gale: ah. quite. a misadventure from my days as an apprentice at blackstaff academy. gale: i was but a child, only a few months into my studies, but already i knew i was destined for greatness. no one believed me, of course, so i decided to prove it. to cast a spell with the blackstaff itself. gale: from one perspective, i succeeded. i opened a portal. however, instead of pointing it at the first year dormitory, i found myself pulled into limbo, facing a very irritated death slaad. gale: fortunately, the blackstaff himself came to the rescue, hauling me back from the brink, and straight into several months of writing lines. or rather, finessing my autograph. gale: now, much as i enjoy reminiscing about such tomfoolery, i believe we've more pressing matters at hand. is there anything else?

this dialogue path from the epilogue has him speaking a bit more about those days as well:

gale & his days as a wayward apprentice

gale: teaching at blackstaff academy has proven such an unexpected pleasure. sometimes i find it hard to tear myself away. gale: just one of the myriad unexpected ways life has delighted me in recent months. gale: even my own city feels new to me, now that i share it with you. player: probably because i make you put down your quill once in a while and enjoy it. gale: that you do. i've not had so much fun in waterdeep since my own days as a wayward blackstaff apprentice. gale: you've certainly made quite the impression on my friends down at the yawning portal. the last i heard, they were thinking of naming a drink after you.

while he seems to have enjoyed a much richer social life in waterdeep before his time of isolation, it's mentioned in another epilogue banter (devnotes) that he didn't seek out any of the more dangerous parts of the city.

there are also other banters about gale's life in waterdeep before the game:

gale & the temple of beauty in waterdeep

gale: i must tell you, shadowheart, the bathing waters here leave much to be desired. gale: the ablutions offered at the temple of beauty in waterdeep are far superior. and they have the most excellent soaps. shadowheart: hmm. i was wondering why you always smelled like a wealthy dowager.

gale & spending time in the hospice of st. laupsenn

wyll: this was a hospital? feels more like a prison. gale: a common enough interpretation. sickness has a nasty habit of making you feel trapped, if only within the confines of your body. gale: i once spent weeks convalescing in the hospice of st. laupsenn after a nasty bout of ruddy pox. for all their kindness, leaving that place behind felt like freedom to me. wyll: i’ve always relied on the kindness of the healers and menders of the coast. better a cleric’s healing touch than a chirurgeon’s scalpel.

gale & florist

lae'zel: these flowers are quite vivid - not to mention, pungent. not to my liking. gale: are there no flowers in tu'narath? lae'zel: in the city of death, the mlar cultivate the fruiting bodies that sprout from the corpses of the slain. gale: i'd rather get them from my florist in waterdeep, if it's all the same to you.

i'm also including this banter between wyll and gale here because it speaks (even if somewhat joking) about his upbringing as a whole by morena:

wyll: i admire your courage, gale. gale: thank you. any particular reason? wyll: between the orb and the bug, you've got more than your fair share of unwelcome passengers. gale: what can i say? mother always taught me to be a gracious host.

we also know that he has had multiple tutors:

lae'zel: you strike me cleverer than most istiki, gale. multiple tutors, i should guess. gale: many a wise man and woman indeed. waterdeep is the home of myriad scholars. wyll: ah, the city of splendours. spent a whole fleetswake there with my father. what a delight.

hiring tutors appears to be relatively common in waterdeep:

so while this sadly wasn't what you were looking for, i hope this is helpful to some degree! 🖤

[thankskenpenders]

And now for something new

So, here's something I was never planning on doing, but I just couldn't shake the idea... Thanks Ken Penders is gaining a sister blog featuring an entirely different comic franchise!

Introducing... Thanks Steve Ditko, a blog where I read the Earth-616 Spider-Man comics, starting all the way back in the '60s! It's gonna be much more casual and less thorough than how I run things here on TKP, though, which I'll explain in a sec.

If seeing me post weird bits from old Spider-Man comics sounds fun and you need no further info, then just head right on over to Thanks Steve Ditko. But for longtime TKP readers, I know you probably have questions...

Number one: Why?

Spider-Man's always been my favorite superhero, and with the Spider-Verse movies kicking ass and my excitement building for the new Insomniac game, I've been in a Spidey mood. Inevitably, a thought occurred to me: Maybe I should actually read the comics that everything else is built off of and see the wildly varying contributions of all the original creators, rather than filtering them through big budget adaptations. If I can power through One Piece and all these other manga with hundreds of chapters, it can't be that hard... right?

And, well, after a few issues I quickly realized that my options were to either clog up my other accounts with random Spider-Man panels for years, or to just make a side blog. And so the side blog was born.

Two: Will this blog replace Thanks Ken Penders?

NO!!!!!!!!!

Okay but prove it

To allow the two to exist side-by-side, Thanks Steve Ditko will have a different format than what Thanks Ken Penders developed. Rather than an in-depth guided tour that critically analyzes every story beat of every issue, TSD will just be a place for amusing panels and brief thoughts as I casually read the comics at my own pace.

If you've seen me make a few tweets about reading Spider-Man recently, I'm basically just moving that to a dedicated Tumblr. It's a place for me to dump these things so that it doesn't fill up my media tab on Twitter for the next decade. (You know, assuming Twitter is still around in a decade.) There will be many issues where I only post two panels that I thought were funny. There will be issues where I don't have anything to say at all. Maybe I'll reach a run that I just cannot get into, and I start skipping around more. Who knows!

This may sound similar to what I thought this blog would be before it blew up. Aside from the simple fact that there's already mountains of Spider-Man commentary out there and therefore less of a void for me to fill, one of the main steps I'll be taking to avoid repeating the past is not enabling an ask box on TSD. I do not need people to ask me to go into ten times more detail on everything. I do not need to write seven essay-length responses to questions about Spider-Man minutiae every day. I do not need a place for people to chide me for not covering certain scenes, issues, or ancillary series.

It also won't have any kind of update schedule. I'm trying to keep it very casual. I'm reading these comics at my own pace, and if I feel like sharing a moment or commenting on something while doing so? It goes there. That's it.

(On the subject of format changes, I'm also listing the issue, writer, and penciller in the body of every post. This is a thing I wish I'd done on TKP so that people didn't misattribute every weird Archie Sonic panel I post to Penders.)

Three: So when will TKP come back from hiatus? You said it'd come back after you finished SLARPG!

I don't know! Sorry. I have a couple things on the backburner right now for TKP, but I'm not sure when I'll get back to proper updates where I read more comics.

I wanted to bring TKP back this year, and that's still possible. The main hurdle is that I want to reread my own archive (again) as a refresher, which is, uh. A lot of posts. I've developed a high standard for myself on here, and I feel like I wouldn't be doing my job right if I forgot half the ongoing subplots and character arcs and didn't bring them up in my analysis. Especially when I'm discussing the work of an author as obsessed with continuity as Ian Flynn. Unfortunately, the nature of this blog means that every time I go on another long hiatus for Life Reasons I have even more comic continuity to catch up on than last time.

(This is a big part of why I'm making Thanks Steve Ditko an extremely casual blog instead of promising to become a Lore Expert on 60+ years of Marvel.)

Mostly I've just been very burnt out this year after having finally finished a video game that took almost eight years to make. I haven't really had the energy for any creative projects, including TKP. But I feel a little bit of a spark here with Spider-Man, so I'm chasing that feeling to try to get back into the swing of blogging about comics - no pun intended.

So, basically, bear with me on this as I start this low-energy side project. But hopefully folks will enjoy Thanks Steve Ditko as its own thing, too.

Look forward to goofy shit like this