#that i have no evidence against because i was literally a child who thought it was all normal

[squidcourse]

small note that anti-endo-pillow-fort supports another user (kingofantiendos / astro) sexually harassing others as a "joke", maybe delete your reblog of their post

I don't really care.

I reblogged a random individual post by a person several days ago. I did not go hunting through that person's post to find out and see who they did or did not support.

Obviously, I think sexual harassment is bad, but like, come on? You went through my posts, happened to find a random reblog from a person who supports another person who did something bad? In what is probably some kind of online drama? I'm supposed to just take your word for it?

What? Do you want me to go hunting for whatever post I happened to reblog, go through that person's account, go through another person's account, and try to verify this random claim you've made in my inbox?

No.

[taintandviolent]

If you're still doing the drabbles could you please do one for Gambit/female reader with #40 please? Love your writing!

warnings: making out, feeling boners.... 'das it. // i'm sorry this is so late!!!

He’s out on a mission, and it’s been days, but your brain is flooded with thoughts of Remy Lebeau. You can’t stop thinking about him, about where he is, what he’s doing, who he’s with, and most importantly, what’s taking precedence in your mind, is when you’re going to be near him again. 

Why? Because, almost a week ago, he’d kissed you in the kitchen when no one else was around, and it was easily one of the best kisses you’ve ever experienced in your entire life. It was warm, smooth and deep, the kind of kiss that lingers, the kind of kiss that leaves you licking your lips like a child licking a sticky sweetness off of their lips. And yet, he hadn’t even used tongue. It was just that good.

It feels like an arduous task, but you somehow manage to focus on something else for a little while – a brief workout. The reprieve is short-lived because eventually, thoughts creep back in, and you’re left frustrated, trying to tame your hunger for that man. You throw the towel over your shoulder, and head down the hallway to your room. 

In a flurry of motion, his jacket flaring out behind him, Remy captures you in his arms. You hadn’t heard him or the others come back, so the surprise is evident on your face when he urges you back against the wall. 

“Well, hi.”

Your eyes sparkle as you stare at him, taking in the visuals of the man you’ve been literally dreaming about for days.

“I wanna’ taste you on my lips again, chere.”His mouth hovers over yours, like he’s asking for permission, even though he doesn’t have to. 

God, he never has to. You’re still pressed up against the wall, his body pinning you to it. You can feel the rigidness of his armor, the leather of his gloves as they trail up your bare arms, leaving goosebumps in their wake. 

You nod and crush your mouth against his, hungrily. His tongue darts out, sweeping across your bottom lip swiftly. You open your mouth, granting him access and his tongue tangles with yours, tasting every inch of your mouth. You bring your hands to the side of his face, to pull him closer to you, but also just to feel him, to touch him. You tilt your head, deepening the kiss and he responds by doing the same, letting his hands wrap around your waist, fingers pressing into the small of your back. 

You don’t know what it is that you have with Remy Lebeau, but what you do know is that if he keeps kissing you the way he’s kissing you now, you’re going to lead him back to your room and lock the door. 

“You know how much I missed you?” He breaks the kiss, but his lips are still so close to yours, you can feel his hot breath rushing out over them. 

You shake your head. Remy’s hand finds yours, and tugs it over his groin, laying it over his hard, aching cock. The bulge that meets your hand is hot and begging for release, straining against the tight fabric. In a slow motion, he urges his hips tighter against your hand, and you grip it outside the fabric. 

Apprehensive, you toss a glance down the hallway, checking for anyone else. You two are alone for the time being. Gently, Remy pulls your face back to his, unhappy with your attention being elsewhere. His hand comes down atop yours, pressing your hand harder into his swelling dick. 

“Remy,” you murmur, looking at his face. “You don’t know how much I’ve been thinking about you… you don’t wanna’ know.” 

“Oh, cher… I think I do.”

[nyerus]

The Narrative Importantance of Hualian's Sexual Intimacy

This is a repost and minor edit of a thread I made on Twitter yesterday. This is a topic I have always wanted to talk about because of how often it comes up in TGCF fandom, time and time again.

‼️CW: mentions of sexual assault, self-harm, bodily injury‼️

⚠️Major spoilers for the entire novel ahead⚠️

---

Saw a question the other day on what relevance Hualian being sexually intimate by the end of the novel had to either the narrative or Xie Lian's character arc.

In short: it bears significant relevance, especially in context of other themes the novel explores like bodily autonomy.

Throughout the novel, we see time and time again that Xie Lian is often dehumanized by pretty much everyone—including himself—with the sole exception of Hua Cheng. I've talked more in depth about it in an old twt thread, for those interested. @/stalliondany on twt has also made an excellent recent analysis that goes deeper into the specific ways Xie Lian was used as a physical shield, martyr, or scapegoat for others without thought to his humanity or suffering. I highly recommend reading it first!

But to sum it all up: it's important to Xie Lian's character arc to keep in mind that he is used to seeing his own body as a tool to solve problems. And in crucial narrative moments, he is robbed of his bodily autonomy, and either brutalized or violated in service of others.

One of the plot points that ties together all these concepts is actually... Xie Lian's chastity vows. That will be the main focus of this post.

When he was a young teen (or possibly as a child), Xie Lian took an oath of chastity because such was the norm for cultivators seeking ascension in Xian Le. To Xie Lian, even as he grew older, he never had an issue with this because he just never felt sexual attraction to another person, or any desire to be intimate in that way. Even if he yearned for the concept of being loved. And indeed, at first glance, his chastity vows may seem like nothing more than a side note. Or even a funny gag when it comes to Hua Cheng (later).

In reality Xie Lian's chastity vows are not only used against him, but paint a very disturbing picture with regards to his repeated violation.

The Land of the Tender scene is the most obvious example of this. Xie Lian's vows are directly tied to his spiritual powers, and because it affects how his followers see him. They place a high value on his chastity as being vital to his moral character.

For reference, an excerpt from TGCF vol. 3 of the English print translation, page 135:

Xie Lian's method of cultivation required a pure body. Those who worshipped the ascended cultivators who practiced this path were firmly convinced of the transcendence of gods untouched by earthly desires. If they couldn't protect their purity, their following would no doubt collapse and their powers would be devastated. It wouldn't be as serious as plunging from godhood to back to mortality, and there was still the possibility of recovery after many more years of cultivation—but with things as they were now, there was no time for him to sit behind closed doors and cultivate for years!

As a reminder: it is Bai Wuxiang who orchestrated this whole thing. Him trying to compromise Xie Lian in this way is horrific on many levels, yet that's not the main point I want to make here. It's that to preserve his "pure body," the solution Xie Lian realizes is to severely harm himself. To impale himself with his sword through the abdomen.

The juxtaposition of having to maintain bodily purity versus the gruesome violence inflicted on his body is extremely stark.

This grim contrast is no more evident than in the 100 swords scene. Where Xie Lian's body is literally brutalized and defiled to an unthinkable degree. To the point where he, quote: "no longer looked human." Yet he emerges from that temple physically "pure" all the same. His chastity vows were not broken, his body healed without scars. As though he was untouched.... And yet, he was completely destroyed mentally. It left permanent effects on him as a person. It's even worse when the scene is read analogous to sexual assault, as many have talked about before. I think that interpretation actually hits the nail on the head, especially keeping in mind the Land of the Tender scene and all the similarities between them.

Following the 100 swords scene, Xie Lian of course has a complete disconnect between himself and his body. I believe this is part of why he doesn't really feel pain, except when he is with Hua Cheng, who treats him and his body as one. As a person who is cherished, and loved. Hua Cheng is adamant in his adoring treatment of Xie Lian. Small injuries are also something he cannot tolerate because he knows what horrors befell Xie Lian in the past. (He was present at both the terrible moments mentioned above.) He will not let any of that continue, regardless of what Xie Lian says, because he sees it as injustice.

Xie Lian is willing to use himself as a tool to help others no matter the personal cost. He even thinks of it as something he must do, or that he deserves as penance. But Hua Cheng is the one person who asks "what about you?" He's the one that insists "your happiness matters." And it is Hua Cheng that takes issue with Xie Lian's chastity vows as being unfair, unlike everyone else. Regardless of Hua Cheng's reasons for this diegetically, symbolically it means a lot that he is the one opposed to this.

Just thinking about the chastity vows on their own for a moment: Xie Lian can indulge a little bit in stuff like alcohol, which isn't great to begin with for him. But he absolutely cannot engage in "pleasures of the flesh." He can totally have his flesh ripped from his bones, literally, but actually experiencing any kind of sexual gratification? Now that would make him unclean, and lesser.... Why? Because unlike everything else, that's something Xie Lian would do simply for himself to feel good. And what greater crime is there than to ever dare put himself first?

So Hua Cheng—being the one person who puts Xie Lian first above all else—thinking that such a restriction doesn't make sense is important. Hua Cheng being the person who Xie Lian breaks those vows for in the end is important! (Especially because it seems to have been an easy choice for him.)

And of course, the scene with Jun Wu and the Virginity Detector Sword™ has to be mentioned. Again, there's symbolism to be had! The perpetrator of two of the most physically violating moments of Xie Lian's life (both of which were sexual in nature; one literally and one allegorically) being the one to "check" Xie Lian's virginity... oof. Yikes. It's dramatic irony. It's deeply uncomfortable. Especially because Jun Wu probably wanted to know if Xie Lian slept with Hua Cheng, as he already knew Xie Lian wasn't the ghost fetus' father.

So it's once again a stark juxtaposition: of Ghost King Hua Cheng disagreeing with the purity vows, wanting Xie Lian to break them for himself and his own freedom. Versus Heavenly Emperor Jun Wu wanting to weaponize those vows against Xie Lian in whatever way he can, intact or not, to keep control over him.

Naturally, there's something to be said for the real-world problem with such purity vows being used against people, to judge their moral character, societal expectations, etc. Elephant in the room. It's very on the nose, so there isn't even much to say about it that hasn't been said already.

In the end, it comes down to how horrible it is that when Xie Lian tries to help others, it results in immense harm to his body every time. Yet he is expected to continue to bear it, for centuries, by others and also himself. Until he meets Hua Cheng, who helps him rediscover what it means to be happy, and to be loved. So yes, it's absolutely relevant that in the end, Xie Lian decides to break his purity vows to be intimate with Hua Cheng. That he's able to put himself in Hua Cheng's hands, and let himself be treated with affection and desire. It's Xie Lian finally forgiving himself, and beginning to heal.

[demodraws0606]

My thoughts on the latest episode (aka HU IS THE CULPRIT I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL)

Warning : My sassy attitude is not directed towards anyone else, I'm simply amusing myself and also I've only gotten barely 5 hours of sleep god save me.

This is gonna be very long and messy so strap in folks

It's so obviously not Eden or Ace it's painful (idc 'i'll die for my hubris). Not even just because Eden lying and being the culprit after all of that would be both underwelming and just...miserable. But also because of how the way we're getting the reveal in advance that it could only be Ace and Eden. The fact the cast was already on Eden's throat as well just makes this point even more clear to me.

This isn't like fucking Korekiyo in chapter 3 of DRV3, this isn't how a culprit reveal happens. Especially not when there's so much we don't know yet.

So who is the culprit ?

...

It's Hu, it's literally Hu.... and like 1 pourcent chance it's Nico but I think both of them are accomplices here.

The thing is, I don't buy any of the shit Nico is saying, their admission of guilt is strangely quick and detached. They also seem to go along with anything people say about them (like them framing Hu) which makes it even more suspicious, they could've just said they used Hu's weapon out of conveniance ? The only thing this episode has proved me is that Nico is an Active accomplice rather than a Passive one like I thought. For what reason ? I honestly don't know fully yet but again we don't know a lot about Nico anyways.

Hu's behavior really makes me think she did it and is acting out, mostly out of guilt. She seems really stressed this trial which while makes sense for character reasons, it also makes sense if she's the culprit and feeling guilty. It would explain her defending Eden and Nico mainly I think despite her probably being the culprit she doesn't want the perception that Eden/Nico has to be broken (especially not bc of her). I've already explained how Hu being the culprit makes sense from a character perspective so I'm not gonna get more into it.

By the way any arguments in this post being like "it would be out of character for Nico or Hu to do that" should honestly review their own hypocrisy if they think Eden did it, or even Ace for that matter.

Another thing that makes me even more convinced that it can't be Ace or Eden is that...you can't fucking prove any of them did it with 100 pourcent certainty. David fucking threw the BDA rule out of the window, so we can't be sure Eden didn't do it but like what decisive evidence would make it clear between the two of them.

The only pieces of evidence we have left is :

-The sticky ball of clothes (most likely turpentine because the soil of the relexation room would cause the ball to have stains on it)

-The alibi for the relaxation room water

-The missing glove (which I think i've changed my opinion on what it could mean here)

Eden did know about the ball of clothes (but that piece of fucking evidence has strings attached so we'll get to that) and Ace doesn't have an alibi against taking the water like Eden does.

The missing glove is the only evidence left untouched here and honestly I actually don't think it had anything to do with the glove having someone's hair or anything, mainly because first of all the culprit could've technically just removed any hair on the glove even if it was sticky.

And also there's something else that makes more sense.

I think they probably had to use the glove to avoid rope burn while trying to set up the mechanism to kill Arei. Especially with how high the playground's ceilling is, it wouldn't be child's play. I'm not really good at deciphering what could've possibly happenened directly in the murder but I'd argue it's just more likely that the culprit would be put in a situation were rope burn could happen. This murder set up would require a lot of physical effort, and if the culprit even slipped for a second their hands would end up being damaged from rope burn making them obviously look guilty (also ouchie), which I think is what happened.

It would also explain the scuffs on the floor, maybe the culprit was struggling to hold onto the rope leading to them causing marks with their feet while trying to pull on the rope.

The reason why I think the glove is missing is probably because it's damaged and the culprit wanted to avoid the cast knowing they used Arei's glove during the murder. In fact it's the only piece of evidence that is completely missing

But why ?

Has anyone realised something about, I argue, the three other main suspects here ?

Nico, Eden, Ace ?

They all have gloves.

"But a huge portion of the cast has gloves this doesn't mean anything, it's just a stylistic choice !!" Yeah, the majority of the cast has gloves.

I think now you can understand why the culprit wouldn't want the cast to know that the glove was used. Because if the cast did see the glove that was probably damaged, they would assume the culprit wore it and it would narrow down the suspect list to an extremely narrow pool. This forces them to basically take the glove and hope to fucking god the cast doesn't catch on which they clearly haven't yet.

You know who doesn't fucking wear gloves.

HU JING

My girl got no gloves on !!!!

So yeah, with the glove being untouched evidence yet I think it will be the main decisive thing to point out who the culprit truly is, and I just don't think it's just gonna be like "oh let's just search everyone to see which one has the glove !". For all we know the culprit could've fucking eaten the glove, I don't think we're getting another Min in trying to search shit on people's person.

Anyways I'm gonna transition to other stuff to explain how the Nico and Hu theory makes sense from a logical standpoint here.

Let's get on to the sticky ball of clothes.

First I want to get it out there that I do not think the ball being sticky is due to the soil of the relaxation room. Mono-TV's talk about the "special formula" was mostly to foreshadow the floor of the playground's properties, also the fucking ball would have stains on it.

For me this means the ball of clothes has to have been covered in turpentine especially now that we have confirmation from Ace directly.

This is extremely huge and I'm flabbergasted has no one has mentioned this. Pray tell where the fuck did that piece of cloth go, did it get isekai'd into another world ?

This question actually has multiple meaning here because that fucking ball of clothing actually has massive implications. It confirms a lot of things and also puts a lot of doubt in things that seemed to be confirmed.

Before that I also want to say that Arei 100 pourcent got knocked out with turpentine. I don't want to argue over and over again that it was used because I've done this before but I have to since there are multiple reasons why she had to have been knocked out.

The floor is extremely prone to scuffs, if Arei was struggling then we definitely would've seen more than just a few marks in one area.

The method of murder would have been extremely difficult if she was struggling, like to a ridiculous point. Especially with someone like Arei who has been shown to have been sneaky and very prone to attacking people in their weak spots.

The tape binding Arei's hand in hindsight actually probably wasn't to avoid her struggling, it was most likely due to how the mechanism of the murder work. Keep in mind how the murder had to have worked and imagine if Arei's hands were just loose and flopping around. There could have been possible injuries with her arms that would ruin the culprit's obvious plan to make it look like a suicide. It also just makes sense for weight reasons, again Arei having her arms flopping around would make moving her body even more difficult.

And even if you want disagree with all of that, the culprit could've just binded her tape to avoid the same mistake that happened with Ace with him waking up from the turpentine.

Now that I've made my case about Arei being knocked out, let's get on the actual new arguments I want to make.

First, we know for a fact that a piece of cloth was used to knock out Ace meaning it has to have gone somewhere, if you say "well they could've just thrown it away" I will personally come into your home and shit in your shoes. And you're also wrong because I've already proven that Arei had to have been knocked out.

This means the only piece of cloth available to us would be the sticky ball of clothes.

But...like let me just explain everything that's mind boggling about all of this.

-This ball of clothes had to have been made for Ace's murder to knock him out

-The only people who knew about the old clothes were Hu, Teruko and Whit. Eden only knowing later on, way after Ace's murder was planned probably, because Hu told her about it.

-The culprit used this ball of clothing against both Arei and Ace

-The cloth is suspiciously absent from the murder scene, which makes no sense considering Nico's account rely on them not having left the gym while trying to murder Ace. Them leaving to chuck the cloth aside only to come back to the gym doesn't make sense with the timeline in how we discover things.

Yep, I'm making the claim that Nico didn't actually kill Ace here, I still think it's Hu. Again you can try and complain all you want about how it's out of character for Nico but the reality is...shit is not adding up.

It's really suspicious how silent Hu becomes when her weapon is brought up, immediatly clamming up and not defending Nico anymore. When Teruko makes assumption that Nico lied to Hu to get her weapon, she doesn't reply with a betrayed "Nico is that true ?" or even a sentence she responds with "That's...". The amout of ellpises both Nico and Hu give are extremely suspicious and just make me side eye both of them extremely hard.

I'm gonna go on another tangent here, on the subject of Hu being suspicious. Mainly because I do wanna point out a moment that both makes Eden seem a lot more innocent and makes Hu a lot more guilty.

The subject of Arei potentially committing suicide.

Now, it's very clear that the way Arei was hung was meant to make it look like Arei killed herself, this was very much meant to be the culprit's intention. Both to hide the true murder mechanism and probably to mislead the cast. The fact that it's only an incidental red mark of Arei's wrist that proves she didn't kill herself, proves that the culprit intended for it to look like a suicide.

However guess who argues against this...Eden, which, if she is the culprit I don't see why she would do something like that (and if you say "well why is Hu defending Nico and Eden" I already explained it). Clearly the Eden!Culprit theory relies on her being capable of manipulation so there's no reason why she would be so caught up in her own feelings to just ruin her own plan like that.

You know who seems to really be into the idea of Arei killing herself though, Hu.

That's all I have to say on that, now let's get onto how I think Nico actually helped Hu.

I do think there's still a 50/50 on them working directly together or just Nico catching onto Hu's plans and deciding on their own to help her.

I do think Nico directly helped her though in two major ways

First, the water, it's the obvious one. Nico probably ended up giving the water the Hu here weither they did so with/without knowing Hu's intention doesn't really matter since they're deciding to keep quiet about it now.

I also want to quickly mention how Hu getting water from the relaxation room makes a lot of sense. Hu was busy with Eden in the kitchen and Teruko had taken all the drinks from the gym, so it's likely Hu was forced to take the water from the relaxation room.

Second, the note

Oooo baby let's get into my favorite realisation in watching this episode.

One piece of dialogue has made me realize something

This made me puzzled too, because yeah, who would be listening in and how did Arei not notice when she went into the room ?

Let me take you all back to Chapter 2 Episode 5

Rose and Teruko have a conversation about Rose's secret and that conversation lasts a good while, until...

Nico was actually shown to have been there the entire time, Teruko and Rose were talking without noticing they were there.

Nico then explains themselves like this, pretty much proving this is something they just like doing casually sometimes.

This actually would explain everything on how the eavesdropping happened, Nico was on the literal fucking floor of the infirmary leading to them listening to everyone's conversation. Which tmeans they could have had the information to write the note.

This would explain the inconcistencies as to why would the culprit know to eavesdrop and how they didn't get caught by Arei when she was barging into the room (if they were outside by the door).

Now this leads to two possibilities with Nico and their relation to Hu.

Either they worked together with Hu and they both came up with the murder together. Which means either of them could've written the note.

Or Nico helped Hu without her knowledge, making the note to help her (edit : just realised this doesn't make a lot of sense ignore this).

I believe this is all I have so far and I'm very tired so you won't get a conclusion

Oh wait I hear something in the background...

"WHAT ABOUT THE TAAAAAAAAPE"

First of all, y'all gaslit me into thinking Ace couldn't have taken the tape so I'm already sick of this tape bullshit being used as decisive unshakeable evidence.

You know what I think probably happened ? Ace took the tape, after all it disappeared when he woke up and it's possible that he just then threw it away in the trash.

I mean Ace did say he was gonna "commit a murder of his own", it would be in line with him taking the tape.

Why isn't he talking about it then ? Because he'd be seen as the fucking culprit and also Ace is not really the most honest bitch out need i mention Ace witholding info about David and Arei's conversation.

[thegreenthepeacetheorange]

Everlark (Catching Fire, Ch. 24-25)

katniss being angry that peeta hasn't come to help her before she realises he literally can't

peeta putting his hand up against the wall and her putting hers up to meet him. these two are so angsty romance-coded

"i just stare at his face, doing my best to hang onto my sanity"

peeta holding and rocking katniss on his lap, lifting her chin so she looks at him. husband. he loves her so much.

(as an aside, johanna and finnick basically being katniss's and peeta's older siblings is so adorable. what a cute fun brokem damaged little family)

when katniss finds out that finnick loves a "poor, mad girl back home", i can't not think of the parallels being set up between annie/finnick and peeta/katniss in the next book

ah the beach scene

"everything. that's what peeta wants me to take from him"

"i realize only one person will be damaged beyond repair if peeta dies. me"

"i do. i need you"

i'm dead at this point. how can people say katniss didn't love peeta. i got the evidence right here!

So before he can talk, I stop his lips with a kiss. I feel that thing again. The thing I only felt once before. In the cave last year, when I was trying to get Haymitch to send us food. I kissed Peeta about a thousand times during those Games and after. But there was only one kiss that made me feel something stir deep inside. Only one that made me want more. But my head wound started bleeding and he made me lie down. This time, there is nothing but us to interrupt us. And after a few attempts, Peeta gives up on talking. The sensation inside me grows warmer and spreads out from my chest, down through my body, out along my arms and legs, to the tips of my being. Instead of satisfying me, the kisses have the opposite effect, of making my need greater. I thought I was something of an expert on hunger, but this is an entirely new kind. 

the idea of peeta trying to talk despite katniss kissing him and then just giving up is too much

the warmth that grows inside of her exclusively due to peeta

the line about a new kind of hunger. bars

she's so down bad for him, and i think she truly realises here, even if she doesn't let herself think about it too much.

finnick waking up and realising the way they're wrapped around eachother and being like... "um get a room? if you want?" is hilarious too

i truly wonder how far they would've gone if they hadn't been interrupted by the lightning bolt. judging by katniss saying there's nothing to stop them this time but them, i think she might've not stopped at all. and the wrapping around each other. i know they were about to cut away in the capitol feeds.

peeta again being husband and making katniss lie down and leading her to bed. "i let him lead me over to where the others are." the "i let him." this books is just a masterpiece in showing the change in their dynamics.

lol at katniss being like "fuck no" at the suggestion of having kids with gale. "for one thing, that's never been part of my plan." like how much clearer has she got to make it. contrasting this to when peeta dropped the baby bomb and she was like: it could be true by now if it wasn't for the games, right? she's so shameless

i honestly feel like crying every time katniss says she thinks of peeta's child safe in the meadows. the fact that it's just peeta's child makes me think that the unnamed, unidentified unspoken of mother, is her. like that's who she's picturing in this fantasy, in this dream.

"when i wake, i have a brief delicious feeling of happiness that is somehow connected with peeta" and she clings to it as long as she can

just something so beautiful that all this talk of love and family and peace and the future is linked with peeta and thus her own happiness. like my heart aches for her.

she can't look at peeta the next morning after their kissing the night before. i think a big part of it was because she just allowed herself to think all these thoughts involving peeta and then came back down to earth very quickly and realised that this wasn't possible for her because of the QQ

the pearl, their inside joke because of effie! the fact they remembered, the fact that they laugh together like this even with everything going on

katniss determining that peeta is her biggest enemy because their desires are the complete opposite when it comes to survival. "i promise myself i will defeat his plan." and even despite them both realising they're at odds, despite peeta not being able to look at her after, they sit together hand in hand.

the pearl and everything it comes to symbolise with these two kills me.

[punkeropercyjackson]

Unpopular Percy Jackson opinions/takes

He IS afrolatino-coded but very much specifically monoracial and darkskin with super strong features.He looks exactly like Poseidon so lightskin biracial Percy dosen't make sense and is a copout and realistically a whitepassing/lighter black person wouldn't get treated as bad he does in the mortal world with the privilege we have from our mixed heritage

He's objectively the most autistic character in the entire franchise in characterization,storylines,dynamics and even character concept-Yes,obviously the protagonist of the neurodivergent abuse victims book series is autistic,y'all wildin' for that allistic Percy shit.He SCREAMS audhd,y'all just hate non-stereotypical autistics and like pretending he isn't one of us so you can make it look like he was victimizing your faves(Jason/Nico shippers:Please go outside)

She's transfem and there's as much evidence for that as the above two and the only reason it dosen't get aknowledged is Pjo fans hate women so they don't want Percy to be one.Won't even let her be a male femme either even though she's canonically feminine presenting with a hate for masculinity both on herself and others and that's very typical tbh.I see her as either a binary trans woman or bigender for projection as a multigender transmasc myself

Percabeth is absolute ass and Annabeth was the worst possible choice for a love interest for him.She's abusive to him by definition i.e nonstop insulting him even after he protests against it multiple times and says he dosen't like it and she's admitted it's on purpose and hitting him often and you can't call 'demigods so it's fine' because she explicitly would never let him hit back and his feelings on her are so mixed i just want him to be free of Situationshiper Girl.The way she literally forced herself into his life by being creepy as shit in TLT and a significant amount of other moments later on too like the SOM stalking dosen't help and neither does her entitlement fueled harrasment of Rachel when Percy never asked Annabeth out and good on him,she can't even flirt and then acts like he's the dumb one for not picking up on her Gone Girl attempt at rizz

Perachel was the closest thing Percy had to a well-written romance and the reason it's hated is that it's an autistic4autistic best friends to lovers dynamic so the immediate reaction is hostility and the removal of Percy's attraction to Rachel he stated was fueld by her being Annabeth's opposite to twist it into the reverse by allistics who're hurt by the truth Percy would rather date an actual autistic girl than the Athena nepotism baby and fight on the fight or flight response to the posibility that maybe friends bullying eachother isn't a universal experience but an allistic one

Luke and him aren't two sides of the coin they're not even the same currency.Luke is in fact Percy's opposite and foil but in the sense he's a very sheltered cishet white man who's a fascist,a serial child groomer and a racist misogynistic pedophile that went on one bad quest and pussy'd out because a taste of the real world was too much for his spoiled self and Percy grew up in the real world,knowing every harsh reality of demigodhood head-on and came out an authentic radicalist thanks to the addition of his blackness,autism and transgenderism/gendernoncormity.Also Percy never had a crush on him and if you think he did,follow your white pedoincest loving bretheren Jason/Nico shippers and remember you were never offered bisexual Percy and that transfem Percy subtext solos it by a landslide

Her,Nico and Hazel are platonic soulmates by choice in every universe and the Dead Sea Siblings are the best relathionship in the Percyverse.She was misderected attraction on Nico's side as he got over her romantically after realizing she's not the ideal man he thought she was and Hazel is as much her world as she is Nico's and Percy is basically their pseudo-parent textually and raised them more and better than Hades and Pluto did and deserves way more credit for it.The Nico and Percy Tlo-Hoo jump retcon was one of the worst writing decisions Rick ever made and Hazel should've been positioned as equally important in their trio intentionally instead of accidentally and her and Percy are tied for the strongest demigod fullstop(like Dad,like Daughter)

He's not grunge or a skater boy,he's beyond afrosolarpunk vibes and it fits him perfectly as the son of Poseidon and a queen who raised him in the ways of the sea because she's loved it her whole life and not for his dad,he's naturally deeply caring about enviormentalism and drawn to nature based aesthetics and lifestyles.Grunge skater boy Percy is highkey gross because it always strips him of his canon completely subulturally accurate punkness and i do headcanon he skateboards but he's not punk because of it lmao,he's punk because he's a dark strong afro-dominicano New Yorker who's an anarchist,an activist,a professional instigator,anti-capitalist,an intersectionalist,has a VERY,VERY strong sense of community and solidarity and is implied to listen to punk music

He's not a nonthreatning lovable screw up who's can't actually be intimidating or take care of himself,he's a hardcore jaded asshole with emotional regulation and self-eestem issues but also a tender and loving Team Parent who's goofiness and kiddy interests are no masking game audhd swag.That's canon but Annabeth can never shut the fuck up instead of backing her white ass up

Also canon Percy is wayyyyy more hot in a Guy Way™️ if that makes sense than Seaweed Brain uwu.My type is cocky ahh yet sweetheart punk black men,what can i say

And the kiddy interests thing is not him being a manchild but a special interest in kidcore and his other ones are blue,video games,cats,the sea,energy drinks,anarchy,child care and the Superfam.He complimented Jason by saying he looks like Superman because he's a Clark Kent stan and wished he was real as a kid so he could've adopted him

His type isn't blondes,it's princess-y black women.'Names have power'and he was named after the man who was happily married to the princess of Ethopia,he described Annabeth's hair as 'curled like a princess' and Leah is the only Annabeth who has something close to chemistry with Percy(still dosen't though,hence 'something close')and Rachel is popularly headcanoned as nigerian yoruba and fits the princesscore personality requirements.Percy's girlfriend/wife should be the Andrómeda to his Perseo

^Relatedly,afrolatino Percy wouldn't be named Perseus because it's too weirdly pronounced in spanish.Perseo Isadore Jackson is Percy's fullname

Calling him stupid or oblivious or insulting his intellegence or emotional capability in any way is ableist.Are you autistic?No?Great,then your opinion on this topic not just when it comes to Percy but when it comes to neurodivergence and how intellect is treated in regards to it is less than worthless.Be quiet normie

He's Mcr-coded and would introduce Nico to it,not the reverse.Also he's literally Mike Milligram

And not Taylor Swift-coded at all.I'm not sorry but he hates her ass so bad like fundamentally he would

He shouldn't repair his relathionship with Poseidon but cut him out of life completely.Poseidon too premordial to be actin' like that over his image to the point of neglecting his own damn child he doomed to lifetimes worth of trauma,all over a crush on a 19 year old when he's mentally in his fucking 40s

He SHOULD revolutionize the greco-roman mythos world but actually,not fuck gods and become a sellout.Kickstarter is him killing Zeus in a fit of rage and that sparks something in their realm that leads to him fixing the system with the help of the lower class beings like him,with Nico and Hazel at his side

He dosen't care for dolphins-He stans sharks

He's not like D.anny Fenton,Peter Parker or Stiles Stilinski.He IS like Virgil Hawkins,Hobie Brown and Scott Mccall

Those Harry Potter comparisons weren't just innacurate,they were entierly baseless.Hp's not even offbrand british Pjo,it's just a bad book series with nothing in common with it all even without Harry vs Percy(Percy would use Harry to get his blue laces btw)

Leo,Piper and Drew have far more interesting potential dynamics with him than any white boy character does and he'd like them better on the basis of not being white boys too

Beckendorf isn't comparable to what Luke was to Percy and that's an insult to Luke.Comparing a black dude to the white supremacist who got him killed is just racist and only caring about that black dude to use him as a background prop for a trauma misandrist young adult transfem's nonexistent boyobsession is VIOLENTLY racist(yes,even as a replacement,please actually care about Beckendorf)

Her Titan's Curse quest was an accidental egg metaphor,not the Hunters of Artemis being 'r.adfem-y',especially since it's canon they're transfem inclusive

Her Disney Princess kinnie and favorite ocean kids media is Brandy's Cinderella and Spongebob Squarepants,not Ariel and Nemo

[sseniita]

breaking generational trauma*

*pls give me a better name for this, im going insane

“She’s like me.” 

The villain stared at the child bouncing in the hero’s arms. The hero’s expression wasn’t unlike one she had when she begged for mercy on behalf of a civilian. Simpler, it was similar to when she had begged the villain to take care of her dog while she was away on a mission or when she wanted the last slice of pizza. Overall, the helplessly hopeful demeanor on the hero's face was one villain had become not only familiar with, but also weak against. 

“Hero, where did that come from? Put it back.” urged the villain, gesturing towards the bundle of blankets in her arms. 

“I can’t! I won’t!” The hero held the child closer, protectively, as if the villain was the one being irresponsible here. 

“Like you?” The villain asked, intrigued. “There is no one like you, Hero.” 

The hero readjusted the child on her hip, freeing one arm to grab paperwork rolled up in her back pocket. “That’s what I thought! Look!” She hastily handed over the crumpled up letters to the villain. It didn’t take more than reading the title for everything to click. 

“Experiment 02? You mean-?” 

“She’s from the same tests! We came from the same lab! They were going to do exactly what they did to me- to her-”

“Because of the success you were. I get it.” There was a pause between them for a second. 

The hero was godlike in some ways and machine-like in less important ways. A literal biological weapon, forged since birth. It was an experiment, you could go so far as to call it an accident. Purposeful or not, the hero was the result of a successful lab sourced super-power. It had taken many years for the hero to come to terms with how she became the hero she was, and even longer to investigate and ultimately discover who was behind all of it. Evidently, she had. 

“I can’t let them do it again.” She whispered, holding the child closely to her chest.

It was six months into knowing each other that hero confessed she didn't like being a hero. It was eight months later the villain found out why.

The villain sighed, motioning for her to walk into his apartment. Once they were comfortable on the villain’s couch, he began to ask a million questions. 

Where? A hidden lab. Why? She couldn't leave her there. Her answers we stable and much too clear of mind considering the hero had just stolen a child.

“How old is it?” He finally asked, skimming through the lab documents. 

“It's her. And about 4 months, I think. I just don’t get why they’re starting now. I never found any evidence to show they were doing anything before.” She restlessly bounced the baby. “I just don’t get it.”  

The villain raised a brow at her, she raised one back. “What do you know?” she scooted closer to the villain. 

“Superheroes are either decommissioned or retire around 50. But most lose relevance and popularity by 30. Whether it be they can’t keep their figure, or a newer, shinier thing comes around.” He scoffed. “Never ceases to amaze me” he said half-heartedly, staring down at the documents. The hero’s mouth dropped. 

“I just celebrated my 25th birthday?! You’re saying I’m old and ugly?!” The villain rolled their eyes. 

“Don’t be ridiculous, you’re perfect and probably always will be." He realized what he had just said, he quickly interrupted the hero as she was about to open her mouth. "It’s just how it goes. Once you reach 30, people aren’t as interested. It’s fucked.” The hero quickly caught on. 

“So, she’s my replacement?” 

“Seems like it. Nova, she’ll be called once she turns 15. Thankfully, tests hadn't started on her. They had her on weird ass diet to prepare her, though. You caught her in time.”

The hero was sitting close enough that the villain could peek at the baby’s sleeping face. She was so serene and had no idea what had already been laid out for her, all the pain and suffering, in the name of good. She’ll have no choice. Just like the hero. The villain often stared at the hero in the domestic settings they sometimes found themselves in. He’d imagine her on a lunch break from some normal, boring office job when they got late night coffees during the hero’s night shifts. Or at a dinner party whenever they teamed up and went undercover at some fancy party. God- he would have given anything to save his hero from the fate that was chosen for her.  The little girl had chubby cheeks and looked so dreadfully soft. Just like the hero.

Shit. The villain thought, looking at the baby. I have a chance to save you. 

  The villain sighed and leaned back, done reading the crumpled pages, discarding the documents on the coffee table, defeated, just like that. It only took 10 minutes. Maybe he had gone soft.

“Eloise. Her name is Eloise.” He exasperated.  It was heart wrenching to hear the hero start to coo at the baby. “No living family.” He hammered the last nail on his coffin. 

“Hello, little Lulu. Is that your name? Lulu? You’re so cute! Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you” She baby-talked, pecking kisses all over Eloise's forehead, evidently disturbing her sleep. “Oh sorry- sorry!” she whispered to the baby. 

She turned to the villain, eyes twinkling with hope. “I can keep her? Right?” The villain crossed his arms. 

“Hero, I’m not going to tell you what to do.” 

“Haha- that’s your way of saying you unconditionally support me.” She said as she cuddled the baby even closer. 

“Please let that child breathe, hero. You can’t hold her too close.” He reached a hand to push the baby a little further away from the hero’s chest. She beamed. “You’d be a great dad! Already keeping me in line!”

Please don’t start. 

 Despite himself, he looked for the best way to act disinterested and yet not fully close the window on that chance. 

“No hero. I know how much this means to you, but I’m not taking care of a baby. I’m not sure if you’ve forgotten- I’m a villain. This is no environment for a child- even if I wanted one. You have my approval if that’s what you’re looking for, but that’s it.” 

The hero ignored that, making a show of looking around the villain’s extremely cosy and expensive flat. Dark green wallpaper with flowers, a white brick fireplace with old books on the mantel. The place was decorated with the plushiest of carpets, and liveliest of plants. Each curtain hid a beautifully ornate window overlooking one of the safest areas in the inner city. The hero could see the hero offices which she resided in from here. Finally, her stare landed on the large spare bedroom where not only did the hero have a drawer of her things but had also spent countless nights in, recovering and playing patient to a medically trained villain. She raised her eyebrows at the villain. 

“No.” 

“Please.” 

“Hero. You are always the one saying you wanted a family. This might be your only chance- ok, I get it. But she can’t stay here. 

“I live in the dorms of the Hero Offices with 20 other heroes! I don’t and can’t have my own place! I’ll be found out for sure! There are probably a million people looking for her right now!”

“Hero-” 

“Villain please. I can’t let them find her. I need you.” She placed a hand on his thigh, seemingly not noticing the villain’s twitch. 

“Hero. I’m not a good person, you seem to forget. You cannot have that much trust in me-” 

“You are the only person I can trust. Please.” She begged. 

Perhaps the villain wasn’t the only one to blame, perhaps both of them had let this get too far. It started off normally, the fights, the one-liners, and bruises. And out of nowhere, the subtle flirting, the late night talks, the absolutely vulgar displays of emotions they’d never shared with anyone else, hit them like a brick. The hero had changed the villain’s life for the better. He no longer felt unbearably lonely and burdened, haunted by the constant terror and forcefulness of his occupation.

Villain had fallen in love months ago. And he had gotten far in distancing himself and learning to un-love. Now he had to take care of a baby with her that just happened to look like a perfect combination of both of them? His dark hair and tanned skin, her warm brown eyes and button nose. Just perfect. 

“Fine.” He squeezed his eyes shut as the hero leaned against him, setting her head right under his neck, thankfully she didn’t hurl the baby to give him a hug. Maybe I deserve kisses on my forehead for Gods’ sake. He quickly hurled that thought away. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!” She beamed, kicking her feet. “This means so much, you have no idea!” 

“Hero, this is temporary. If anyone finds out about this-” 

“Ya, ya, I know. Don’t worry. Everything will be ok! I’ll make sure of it!” 

The villain’s only hope was believing her. She was an atom bomb inside a 25 year old woman after all. Maybe he shouldn’t underestimate her. As she moved in towards the guestroom with Eloise, the villain watched intently, she set her down for a nap on the bed, and once she finally came out she looked determined and extremely excited. She plopped down on the couch making sure they were touching side by side so the villain could look at what she was seeing on her phone. Her fingers scrolled down a website titled ‘what to buy when you're expecting’ the villain groaned.

After an hour of the hero paraphrasing a multitude of blogs and villain jotting down notes, they had completed a list of things they needed to raise a child. The hero deflated when she mentioned how they’d have to skimp out on baby toys and clothes, but she quickly recovered after the villain reassured her money wouldn’t be an issue. Apparently villainy had its perks. 

“So what are you going to do about the corporation? Can you really make sure this won’t happen again?” The villain asked the hero from the entrance way. The hero walked over, baby in arms, the villain helped the hero get her coat back on. 

“Uh well. I maybe, sort of, accidentally, may have burned the place down…? Timidly she made eye contact with the villain who only chuckled. 

“I may have also stolen any hard drive I could have found and threw it in the river.” The villain’s laugh only continued as he put a hand on the small of her back and led her out the door. 

As they were walking to get a car seat- the first of many things on their list- the hero had asked the villain to hold Eloise while she used the lady’s room. She had been asleep when the villain got her but quickly after, she woke up. The villain immediately felt a panic and he feared she might start crying, he held her close, bouncing and hushing her to get her back to sleep. Eloise stared up at the villain for a long time before breaking into giggles, reaching her tiny arms up to touch his nose, getting the attention of the shoppers who started cooing at the handsome man rocking the baby with the loudest giggles ever.  

Right then and there, as he felt the tiniest, softest hands grab his nose, the villain knew he was completely and utterly wrapped around, not only the hero’s finger, but of these tiny fingers as well.

pt 2

[starberry-cupcake]

After a weekend that exhausted me, I am finally able to come back to this book. My reacts proved useful to remind me where I left of, who would have thought.

previously, on harrowberry the ninth:

this happened

also, harrowberry is courtesy of @lady-harrowhark

after which I suggested the following album cover as a representation of her

currently, chapters 14-16:

"The Mithraeum, the seat of the First Reborn! The Sanctuary of the Emperor of the Nine Houses, the bolthole of God"

I don't want to sound like gideon

I really don't

but I have to be entirely honest here

I read that sentence twice, at separate times

and neither of those times did I read "bolthole"

MOVING ON

harrowberry is settled in a room which was made for a lyctor that never was

I don't know if this is at all important but it caught my eye

I wonder what happened there

and I am, as we have established, fixating on very particular things

the emperor johnny bravo has a room that's described as a locked tomb, but harrow says that, unlike the other locked tomb, she's not interested to see what's in this one

on the one hand, I want to know what this guy's actually doing but, on the other, I don't care about what's going on in his intimacy

harrow is also surprised that he gets embarrassed

which I don't, because he should be embarrassed and ashamed about all of the stuff that is going on in general

I don't know specifics and I don't know details, but I know he's at fault

like we say over here, I've got no evidence but I've got no doubt

he tells harrowbean about the BOE

he says they hate the nine houses and that they have agents who turn planets against them

they got themselves a leader about 25 years before harrow was born, who made things more difficult for johnny man

let's bring back the timeline I'm constantly discarding and bringing back

we've been told now that: this leader showed up 25 years before harrow was born, they disappeared nearly 20 years ago and gideon was born 18 years ago in space to a mom who was brain dead upon arriving at ninth

there's also the whole eggs thing that idk if it has something to do with this or not but we're not totally throwing anything away here

we've moved from a cork board to a 3d model at this point

emperor johnny boo is blaming these people for not!dulcinea going ballistic

idk johnny man, you kind of fucked that up on your own I think, but go off, I guess

he also says that the BOE folks hate necromancers and necromancy

I don't wanna be making assumptions with little to no info (literally all I've been doing) but all I've seen so far is these people teaching harrow to kill planets

that's not what miss frizzle told me I should be doing when she wore the most iconic looks in television history

maybe if the emperor dressed like this I'd be trusting him more

emperor johnny also clocked harrow being a ninth kid smoothie

because harrow was doing theorems in the river and only one other person ever did that before

the person who founded the sixth

we're ok with the sixth because camilla came from there

when harrow starts telling him the smoothie story, the emperor says "This was...all so different...before we discovered the scientific principles" and proceeds to tell her that her parents basically did a mini resurrection

he says "I have committed the same act, and I know the price I had to pay" and calls her "a walking miracle"

to which harrow responds "I have just told you that I am the product of my parents' genocide"

emperor, my man

he says "nobody has to know" about the kid smoothie

there sure are a lot of things people aren't supposed to know or ask about over here in the emperor's bolthole

*me, high fiving gideon's force ghost*

he says the initials of BOE mean "blood of eden" and that Eden is "someone they left to die"

then he quotes shakespeare??? I think king lear???

“How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is To have a thankless child”, that quote

I'm not super knowledgeable when it comes to shakespeare tbh but...ominous

he also says "once you turn your back on something, you have no more right to act as though you own it"

and harrow thinks "at the time, that had made perfect sense to you"

that's pinned under the "hope for later" category

NEXT CHAPTER

harrow talks to ice cube barbie in her dreams

ice cube barbie says she's died twice

THEN, AND THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT

harrow asks her if she has ortus's eyes or if her eyes are hers and what her eyes are like

and ice cube barbie says "she asked me not to tell you"

this is me, adding another thing to the "hopeful hints for gideon" shrine I am building

chapter 16

harrow asks yandere twin about her diary and she says it has been burned on her own orders

more hints for my theory of past!harrow knowing a lot and planning ahead

harrowcita calls lyctortus (name suggested by the reply gang, thank you reply gang) "the other one"

which could be "other" as in "other lyctor" or as in "other ortus", so it's fine either way

harrow is worried about not!dulcinea still being a threat

AREN'T WE ALL

AREN'T WE ALL

I SURE AM, ALWAYS

she should have been flushed into space

harrow thinks not!dulcinea is moving and yandere twin calls her "crazycakes"

then we start going a bit more in depth about augustine

I have come to understand that he isn't called "saint of patience" because he's patient

he's called "saint of patience" because that's what you have to practice when you're around him

good god, this man

he has the charisma of the fifth but the disagreeable nature of the eighth

here I am, making judgment on these people I only know like 2 representatives of, but anyway

he's like if magnus hadn't discovered a passion for baking and had instead decided his hobby was to be passive aggressive and thinking too highly of himself

his cav was his brother, apparently

harrow thinks he's hollow inside

he is absolutely horrendous to mercygirl

BUT, MOST IMPORTANTLY

he also alludes to not!dulcinea moving and thinks mercygirl is doing it

I don't know about this, you guys

two mulders in one recap is what you get when I have been forced to not read for a couple days

I think fox mulder represents my energy in these recaps

Augustine The Unpleasant mentions that johnny j has "spent the last 10 thousand years on a perpetual search-and-destroy mission out of, as far as I can tell, purely symbolic retribution"

great, that sounds fantastic for god to do

and that "I wouldn't set myself up as his replacement A.L. He doesn't need another bodyguard, and even she was significantly more lucid than you are" (you being mercygirl)

I had mentioned the possibility of ice cube barbie being this AL person, we still don't know, but this AL is "she"

let's put that in the 3D model

augustine calls chad a "nice boy", which tracks for him being a Senior Chad

he treats harrow badly, which we absolutely don't stan over here in the harrow respect corner

harrow obliterates him with a comeback and he calls her Anastasia (You were born in a palace by the sea / A palace by the sea? Could it be?) like the previous ninth

these people love comparing their old pals to everyone they meet, even if they supposedly didn't get along much

harrow also makes fun of yandere twin for being what gideon would call "a weenie" over augustine

then we get the augustine and johnny explanation of how to kill the beast

I am all for information but this whole thing gives me the worst vibes

basically he says the beasts (disrespectful name) eat planets like oysters and then keep the thanergy as armor

the beast can inhabit anything it's thanergetically connected to it via their death

like that which they kill

they travel as river projections

they have agents, which he describes like the borg in star trek

individual forms connected to its hive

the whole lyctor thing, having a necromancer's ability with a cav's training to take over the body, seems to be a key to fighting these things

because the necro part goes down into the river to do the thing and the cav can take over the defense of the body

this, I think, could be what we saw harrow doing in the prologue, the projection thing

but harrow's body isn't protected, because she's "lyctor lite"

because there's hope for gideon or so help me john

which might be why yandere twin was telling her she would not be guarded if she did what she was about to do

I am very intrigued as to what harrow will come to know to push her to do what she did

also, she got stabbed, so I'd like to know if she's fine

but we have 0 guarantees of anything over here in the mithrandir or whatever

the emperor's bolthole

god, what has gideon done to me

they say the point of the combat is to throw the beast's soul into the abyss and hope it doesn't come back

that's what I've been trying to do with not!dulcinea all this time

ALSO still no camilla

see you next time and thank you for not hating the length of these things ♥

[juneyjubilation]

First of all, hello!! I hope you have/ had a great day, I wanted to make a request about Dick Grayson, we all know he's just a ball of sunshine but what about we (As another vigilante who's close to him+ he has a crush on -you can keep the details short or as long as you want-) finding him at his lowest? But like... Really really lowest... In the point where he feels like a disappointment to his parents to bruce himself, to Alfred or basically to everyone who knows him, the point where he thinks he's letting everyone down... The point where he's about to cry and have a panic attack (inside out 2..) and we find him, (let's just say that reader knows him well enough to be able to say somethings are off with him..) try and do everything we can to comfort and console him because... My man really deserves true affection and reminder that he has amazing affect on people around him... (The trigger to his break down could be him, not being able to save a child as he tried to save 5 other people in danger etc. whatever you want, I hope I'm not making any mistakes on writing because English is not my native language and I'd literally sit down and cry if I didn't express myself successfully ;( also could you please make it AFAB?) Thank you so much for everything in advance..

Feel free to ingore this request, but if you won't do it please inform me I won't be hurt 🙏🏻💝

hi! thank you so much for the request :) i absolutely did not mind writing this, though i fear i did mistakenly add more trauma to the golden boy - so ummmm... my bad!

and your english was good at conveying your point! i hope i was able to translate this to paper well :)

also i listened to Birds of a Feather on repeat whilst writing this! enjoy!

details: no use of y/n/(reader), dick calls the reader 'Angel', she/her user, this could be seen as platonic, but he is evidently pining in his thoughts.

content warnings: mentions and brief description of child death, flashbacks to parental death, minor character death (of the unnamed child), panic attacks.

- thank you for reading!! continue to under cut to read -

The haunting memory of the child he had failed, the one he couldn't save, grips him in a vice-like chokehold. It's a branding iron seared into his very soul, a constant reminder of his inadequacy—a festering, gnawing wound that threatens to consume him whole. He clutches his throbbing temple, his mind replaying the horrifying moments when the child, caught in the crossfire, fell to their inevitable fate.

For a single moment the image of that little girl in her yellow sweater returned him to the memory he ran from most; the image of his parents and their once striking yellow and green costumes danced in red.

Contorted bones and brain matter tended to have that effect on him.

Each labored, panicked breath he exhales is a testament to the tumultuous turmoil within him. Sweat trickles down his temples, mingling with the darkness of his hair as tears threaten to spill down his cheeks, unchecked by the demons gnawing at his soul.

His body trembles, the sudden vulnerability an unfamiliar and unwelcome companion. His once steady hands now shake as he struggles to compose himself, to regain control of the emotional maelstrom that threatens to consume him.

The cool Gotham breeze offers no solace, the whispering wind carrying the echoes of the child's cries and the deafening silence that followed.

In a tortured whisper, Nightwing tries coaxing calm into his body. "Breathe... in... hold... out..." His words echo faintly in the wind, a desperate attempt to wrestle back control.

Each labored breath becomes a tiny beacon of light, guiding him through the storm of self-doubt and guilt. He imagines the air filling his lungs like a warm, golden light, chasing away the shadows of despair.

One hand reaches up, fingers brushing against the emblem that adorns his chest, a symbol of his past and his future, a reminder of the strength he has wielded time and time again.

The other hand forms a fist, his knuckles turning white, as he clings to the memory of the five children he saved, the lives he changed. His heartbeat slows, his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm, as the grounding exercise takes root.

The tenuous grip on his grounding fades like a fading signal, replaced by the raw, unadulterated pain of his failure. He collapses in on himself, sobbing, rage and despair mingling in his anguished cries.

In his mind's eye, the image of the little girl materializes once more, a beacon of hope snuffed out, the same way his own youth was extinguished. The memory of his mother, her laughter and love, dance just beyond his reach. The parallels between the two haunt him, a relentless tormentor.

Tears stream down his cheeks, the salty droplets stinging the wounds of his soul. His shoulders quake under the weight of the burden he bears, the crushing guilt of that lost life threatening to drown him.

In the midst of Nightwing's torment, a shadow falls over him, a gentle presence signaling the arrival of a familiar figure. A figure he has deemed his *Angel*.

She lands gracefully beside him, a figure shrouded in mystery. Yet, for him, she embodies strength, solace, and warmth. Her aura fills the space around him, tickles at his senses in a way that's instantly recognizable, even in the darkness of Gotham's smog.

A gentle hand brushes through his hair, her touch a caress, tender and caring. "There you are," her voice a soothing balm to his raw emotions. He feels her presence, the mere nearness offering a sliver of comfort to his broken spirit.

In the shadows, his solace crouches beside her friend, sensing the turmoil that wracks his body.

Nightwing's initial instinct kicks in, a mixture of surprise and panic as he realizes he's been discovered in his most vulnerable state. The superheroic facade he presents to the world is shattered, exposing the raw, bleeding core of his humanity.

The very thought of burdening her with his failures and shortcomings weighs heavily on him. He's always been the one to save, to lead, to console. The thought of being the one needing rescue is an eerie and unsettling prospect.

Nightwing opens his mouth to protest, to push her away, to defend his honor, but the words stick in his throat. He can't bear to witness the disappointment in her eyes, or the pity that would surely follow.

Instead, he utters the word that's reserved for her alone. "Angel..." The plea is a confession without words, an admission of the depth of his trust in her.

Instead of pulling away, she scoots closer, wrapping her arms around him, a shield against the unyielding darkness that threatens to swallow him whole. Her presence is a beacon of hope, offering a safe haven in the storm that refused to wane.

Angel shakes her head gently, her eyes filled with an understanding that transcends words. Her lips move in a soft, almost imperceptible whisper, weaving a tapestry of comfort through her words.

"Grief, it's a beast, twisting in your gut, aching in places you never thought possible. It's a reminder of the things you can't change, the memories that haunt, the life that slips through the cracks."

Her voice is a lullaby, a rhythmic pattern that guides him through the tempest of emotions. She speaks with the ruggedness of a street-hardened hero and the tenderness of a loving friend.

"But we don't drown in it. We don't let it define us. We let the tears fall, the chest heave, and then we find the strength buried beneath the pain to carry on."

Nightwing listens to her soft words, the wisdom in her voice like a balm to his raw emotions. His thoughts drift back to the time they first met, the war-torn streets of Gotham, a city on the brink of ruin.

He remembers the first time he saw her, the way she moved through the chaos with an almost ethereal grace. She was a beacon of hope in the midst of despair, her emerald eyes sparkling like jewels, piercing the darkness.

In that moment, he knew he would follow her, that she would be his shining star. And so, he called her Angel—not because she resembled the celestial beings but because she represented the light that guided him through life's shadows.

He would never share this with her, this intimate connection that bound them together, a secret that only he held tight to his chest. For in this moment, he realized that Angel's words weren't a fix-all, a panacea to mend all his wounds. They didn't erase the knot in his throat, the heaviness in his heart. But they did something equally profound; they eased the suffocating weight of isolation.

For the first time, he realized he didn't have to face this alone. That he had been surrounded by a network of support, of friends and allies who shared his purpose.

In her arms, he felt anchored, tethered to reality, to the world he fought so tirelessly to protect. A world that was no longer a shadowy, menacing abyss but a place of hope, of potential, of redemption.

And as his sobs subside, leaving behind a silent contemplation, he knows that there will be other battles, other moments of weakness, but he wouldn't face them alone.

In the company of Angel, the moniker 'Nightwing' did not feel like a suffocating mantle that weighed heavily upon Dick's shoulders. Instead, it became a symbol of the partnership they shared, a badge of honor that spoke volumes about their bond.

Angel, with her unwavering support, reminded Dick of the reasons he chose this path in the first place—a desire to protect, to heal, and to stand for justice. Her faith in him, her belief in his abilities, and her unwavering trust in their combined might, breathed new life into the persona he had donned.

Nightwing, the man and the symbol, no longer felt like a burden, but rather the manifestation of his resolve, a testament to his strength, and a beautifully complex reflection of his vulnerabilities. In the presence of Angel, he could be both a hero Gotham needed and the person he needed to be in order to heal from his past.

In the silence that follows, Dick finds himself looking into the eyes of the woman who had become an indispensable part of his life. A man of few words when it came to expressing his gratitude, he finds solace in the simplest of gestures.

He wraps his arm around her, pulling her close, his strong frame enveloping her as he basks in the comfort of her presence. His jaw clenches, the tension a testament to the weight of his emotions. Eventually, he finds the courage to express his gratitude.

"Thank you, Angel." The words are a whisper, sincere and heartfelt. He holds her tighter, as if to etch this moment in his memory, a beacon of warmth in the cold, unforgiving city that they call home.

In that moment, he doesn't need grand speeches or declarations of love, but the simple act of being in her presence. Their bond, forged in the fires of conflict and the camaraderie of friendship, is a testament to the depth of their connection.

He knew he could depend on her, in the darkest hours and brightest victories. She was the calm in the eye of his storm, the beacon of hope that flickered in the shadows.

Together, they stood as guardians of the city, protectors of the innocent, and confidants to one another. Dick Grayson, the young circus performer, and the vigilante known as Nightwing, had found in Angel a companion for life, a partner in crimefighting, and a friend he cherished more than gold.

As they sat on the rooftop, the weight of the world momentarily lifted, Dick knew that he owed her more than he could ever repay. But the debt, he realized, was one he would gladly continue to work off, through every mission, every battle, and every victorious smile they shared. Because in her, he had found not just a comrade but a partner of the heart. And his gratitude, as always, was simple and true: Thank you, Angel.

[latteedrawz]

Reasons why I think Jimmy might be a fae:

When splashed with the lore revealing potion, Jimmy became tiny. It might be that the potion is false and just shrunk Jimmy's size, but it is can also be possible that Jimmy turned tiny due to being a fae in disguise.

When talking to the old sheriff [Martyn], the old sheriff calls Jimmy a Pixie. Something EXTREMELY close to a faerie/fae. Not to mention the old sheriff never gave Jimmy his name.

This might not be on purpose but Jimmy is TERRIBLE in PvP lately. He tried killing fWhip twice and failed both times. Faeries are harmed by iron, and Jimmy has a literal railroad made out of it. Maybe it weakened Jimmy but he doesn't even realise it.

Faes don't forgive easily and hold grudges against people who have acted horribly towards them. They sometimes go into the persons way to ruin stuff for them, breaking their stuff.. cursing them... attempting to kill them sometimes as well.

Fae like children a lot more than adults and in some stories are shown playing with them and causing mischief. Jimmy didn't like Hermes at first, but that was only because of Joel. When the law/lore alliance was made Jimmy IMMEDIATELY became nicer to Hermes, even calling him a kind kid at one point. Not to mention Tiny Tom! Jimmy tried so hard to get Tiny Tom back, but that might just be him being a mama bird. It's a cool thought though. [FUN FACT: FAES USUALLY STEAL CHILDREN AS WELL] // EDIT: JIMMY KEPT HIS GOBLIN CHILD BECAUSE HE'S LONELY AND WANTS SOMEONE AROUND, BUT WHEN FWHIP BECOME A NORMAL EMPOROR AGAIN HE THREW THE GOBLIN CHILD AWAY? This gave me many mixed signals.....

Jimmy has NEVER gave his actual name to people in empires, which is James. He uses nicknames for himself near others.

Fae love nature and Jimmy has shown interest in getting more plants and life in Tumbletown, he just doesn't know how to. He has asked Sausage for tips multiple times.

Jimmy might have been a fae at one point and lost his wings, or just ran away from the other faes. It's a cool theory but very unlikely. But then again, we have no idea what Jimmy was before being a sheriff.

Faeries are easily offended and might turn evil if they feel like you have betrayed/wronged them beyond forgiveness. Sounds familiar huh??? *looks at Jimmy and Fwhip aggressively*

Jimmy has done SO MANY THINGS THAT WOULD GET YOU KILLED BY A FAERIE UNLESS YOU WERE ALSO ONE.. He entered a fae ring, said his name near the fae multiple times, accepted a gift from the fae, said sorry AND thank you, went around telling others about his interaction with a faerie, and more... Either Jimmy is a faerie or he's just the faes favourite.

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW!!! COMMENT IF YOU HAVE ANY THEORIES OR EVIDENCE :D I'd love to hear it!!

EDIT: MARTYN/OLD SHERIFF CALLED JIMMY ONE OF THE FAE AND JIMMY QUICKLY DENIED IT!!! Jimmy could be a runaway fae?? Maybe that's why he was so scared of the fae corruption! He might be thinking the faes want revenge.

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Honestly? All your evidence against Ruin is very very true, very very sus, and very very convenient for him.

I think the only reason why I want him to be innocent to some degree (either revealed he's still being controlled and not that just being him) is I don't want Moon's paranoia to be validated. That is literally it. If Moon is right to be suspicious, that he was right in doing everything he did with Ruin-

I just really really do not want that paranoia to be justified. That is literally it.

All your evidence is probably right though, Ruin, please be a better actor you have gained the ability to be subtle but that is really not helping you.

The thing is that, Moon feels he was disproven in his paranoia and that he decided to give Ruin leniency.

Which is why Ruin was able to get away from Moon, and ask for dimensional travel.

I have a feeling Ruin put a lot of things in place to assure that he would infiltrate Sun and Moon near perfectly.

Considering the latest MAFS episode (which I feel is very important considering how Daycare Attendant centric it is)

"Cured" Ruin and Bloodmoon have not met up yet.

And I have a feeling they will very soon. And Bloodmoon was built with the sole purpose of being Ruin's minion. And Bloodmoon hasn't outgrown that purpose. Right now, Bloodmoon has no directive, and is taking orders from Stitchwraith, but once his maker comes back into the table, I feel all bets are off the table.

Also, lets rewind for a bit... What if Moon's earlier paranoia about Ruin is proven true...

THAT would have MASSIVE benefits that we aren't even thinking about. Like at this point, Moon's paranoia proven right would just help them rather then help them.

They'll trust Eclipse

Eclipse will be taken more seriously and less like a madman or feral child that Moon needs to manage.

Eclipse will get to be something else other then a villain or just an inconvenience for once.

THIS WILL NOT HELP MOON'S EGO AT ALL. For those who think Moon would gloat like "ha! I was right!" I don't think it'll be like that. HE'D FEEL BETRAYED and utterly devastated. It's one thing to be suspicious of someone. But to have those suspicions disproven and not being proven and put your trust into them despite all that and then the evil villain you've built in your head (Eclipse) turned out to be right the whole time and you fucked it all up by not listening to the untrustworthy one.

Remember Eclipsev3 was crying when he was captured because he knew it wouldn't matter what he said, no one would ever trust his word against Ruins? Eclipse would be given trust for the first time ever....

And you know what. AFTER ALL THIS TIME. SUN AND MOON DO NOT KNOW ECLIPSE'S BACKSTORY. As far as Sun and Moon know, Eclipse was a killcode that became sentient and started evil shit for no reason. I hope this will open the door for that conversation to be had.

Not to Mention, Evil Sun today told Moon that he should actually LISTEN to Eclipse. Cause if he doesn't, it just means that this universe will die faster.

I am also surprised that none of the characters call Ruin out specifically for lying. As I have caught him lying several times and none of the characters seem to be wise to it.

Eclipse when he was threatening Ruin did not even think to bring up the Magical Barrier he has encountered twice now. He didn't think to bring up how he was made from Arcade machines either.

All Eclipse thought about was his rage, but if he defused Ruin with logic, he could have easily caught him, other then just going "BUT YOU DID IT! WAH"

Ruin contradicts and changes his story so many times in the span of a few seconds and it has been proven in his Interrogation under the Virus he is a chronic lair. Lie detectors don't work. You have to catch him verbally in a contradiction. Which he has Spouted MANY.

So I always hoped that Moon, Solar or Eclipse would point out these purposeful contradictions but No characters do.

RUIN LEGIT SAID ALOUD "I don't know magic."

Okay. Then he said way earlier: "I constructed this magical barrier to trap you"

....... Okay. YOu can copy a spell, but even COPYING a spell itself is KNOWING magic. The mana has to come from SOMEWHERE. He's not pulling it out of his ass!

Eclipse NOR Moon called this out.

Ruin knows that NewMoon is not as experienced in Magic as OldMoon was. (WHICH MOON ADMITS) and Ruin is taking advantage of that.

Not to mention Eclipse’s magic circle is just an exact copy of Old Moon’s magic circle and wasn’t made by someone knowledgeable in magic.

Ruin being scared of Eclipse almost everytime he encounters him is interesting.

BECAUSE HE IS LEGIT THE ONLY ONE WHO IS. ALMOST LIKE HE'S OVERSELLING HIM.

One moment, Ruin will cower over Eclipse and act traumatized by him, but then he talks about plans about making Star-Powered type Nukes (LEGIT. HE DID.) and then gloat over Eclipse...

Not to mention, Eclipse had never tortured Ruin. He threatened him, sure, but he never physically harmed him. He left before he could do so. But Ruin told Moon and Sun that Eclipse physically tortured him for a long time... BUT THAT'S NOT TRUE. Because Eclipse just threatened torture and the moment Ruin mentioned the Creator, Eclipse went off chasing that wild goose.

So the question comes down to motive... Why do all this with Eclipse.

Well, to accelerate the Death of the Universe. Not just ours.

The Tsams universe is not the main universe. But it's a pillar universe. Meaning if it goes down it takes a few others down with it.

RUIN WANTS TO DESTROY MULTIPLE DIMENTIONS.

Why????

Where did Ruin come from?

What is his dimension?

He has a virus in him that makes him subservient to the Creator in his home world. (if not a little unhinged and bound for destruction and amplifying the violent parts of his personality)

What did the Creator of that dimension want?

He wanted to accelerate the death of the universe by star power so he could study it.

........well.

He already did that with his own dimension.

The creator needs more control samples for multiple dimensions rotting.

And why the hell does the Creator have a cure for the Ruin virus when it's beneficial to him in the long term?

Even Sun said he grabbed something he "thought" was a Cure, and Moon seemed unsure if it was a cure in the first place too.

All Ruin said it did was "cure the fog" from his head. Which makes me think that he's less focused on playing games... (like the Monty of Ruin's dimension thought he was a freakshow) so I think that Ruin is just more focused in long term goals... Also I think his goal was always to pretend to be cured. Looking back in how he acted and what he did when he took over last Halloween.

Ruin, He already knew Bloodmoon was rebelling against him. The protocols he put in bloodmoon to be obedient weren't working how he intended. So he made Eclipse with STRICTER protocols to not make the same mistake and to cause chaos among the Sun and Moon duo.

Eclipse is a distraction so that he can RUIN everything.

[enixamyram]

I have tried really hard to ignore anti nonsense. I just wanna focus on the good and positive side of this fandom and just enjoy the series in general. But it's also hard bottling up thoughts when I'm used to ranting for the sake of getting my thoughts and feelings out and moving then on.

So I'm gonna put a couple reactions to Anti-Related Hazbin things under the read more just to get them out! Because my god, some of these are bullshit!

Chaggie - I've seen so much bullshit citicizm for this ship. People claiming they're boring or bland or badly written and I have yet to see a legit reason why other than that they don't have any typical relationship drama (which, for the record, I personally am so relieved about) or because they're not being overly affectionate every five minutes of screen time. And you know, this especially drives me crazy because they have some of the sweetest little gestures, whether it be holding hands, hugging, swinging each other round or even just the constant damn heart eyes they have when looking at each other in the background! They're so damn precious and if you can't see that, you don't know what a legit established relationship is supposed to be past the honeymoon phase.

Charlie - People once again have claimed she's badly written. I don't know why people seem to hate happy kind hearted females so much but I have seen this exact complaint about many characters who are similar to her. None of which are actually badly written. They're just not the new stereotype "bad asses" that seems to be the only acceptable way to write a female character lately. Which is ironic since a lot of the so called "bad ass" female characters I have seen are often so one dimensional. Yet we have Charlie, a kind hearted but also sometimes naive girl who is doing her best while also learning with the rest of her friends and ya'll are gonna try and claim she's not amazing? The more I rewatch the show, the more I wanna reschedule my favorite character list because there's not a second I don't adore having her on my screen.

Niffty - This one really makes me want to slam my head against the wall. I have seen so many people complain and claim she acts like a child. Bare in mind, I've just watched episode 3 - you know, the one where Niffty is fully ready to throw herself into the BDSM that Angel takes them to. The only thing close to evidence that I have seen for her acting like a child is the episode where she gets drunk except she's still not acting like a child there, she's acting like a drunk! When some people are drunk they're silly and dumb and very "child-like". Otherwise, the only reason I think people call her a child is because she's is literally small like one. Yet, if you actually look at anything past her basic physical appearance, she's a crazy murder machine and I don't know many children I can also give that title to.

Angel - This is so old and everyone else has said this all so much better than me but I just really want to repeat: Just because it's not YOUR representation doesn't mean it's BAD representation. Just because you dealt with your sexual assault in a certain way does not mean everyone deals with it that way and it sure as hell doesn't give you a right to dismiss others. I have seen so many people say they identify with Angel's character and his hypersexuality, so it is so annoyingly arrogant to see people trying to shut them down entirely because Angel's character isn't portraying their personal reactions. It's just so amazingly self-centered to be saying that if you can't personally relate to it exactly, then it shouldn't exist at all. Seriously, grow the fuck up.

Loser Baby/Poison - Again, this has been said so many times before by other people but I'm gonna add/repeat. Some people take these songs and videos so damn literally. I saw someone claim Angel was happy during his dance with Valentino in Poison which apparently made the whole character a contradiction? Completely ignoring the parts where he's clearly miserable or the part where he's clearly putting on a fake smile or even the part where he all out says he dissociates to get through. And then you have Loser Baby where people are outraged that Husk call Angel a loser and is apparently trying to compare their situations? I mean, he's obviously not saying they're situations are the same if you think about it for more than two seconds. Like, are you seriously this literal? If I said the message went over your head, would ya'll look up?

[medievalcat]

I was going to joke that I always think its funny when people are like "Angelina wouldn't want Hoffman to kill any people ever :(" bc like how do we know that, we unfortunately barely know anything about her but also why would she care if someone like Ivan or the abusive guy at the school died, or yknow the guy who literally killed her, fuck knows none of us do lol. BUT it got me thinking about how...kind of the point of her inclusion in the story is a commentary on society and the legal system's endemic violence against women. Women are killed by partners so much that people just don't even think about it and the law often does nothing at all or enables it or is a part of it. Angelina's death in the story is essentially considered a minor crime that her killer pretty much gets away with legally. Seth Baxter when in his trap even claims he accidentally killed her, a classic tactic used by many men who actually do murder their wives and girlfriends. Angelina was considered an acceptable loss, a forgettable statistic, even before she was killed. She was only in the headlines because she was related to a local detective. The law was never on her side.

In retrospect, when we learn about all this, the horror of Saw IV isn't simply "wait the detective was the killer all along!" Because we see that the trafficker is known to be exploiting young girls- but that these young girls are not evidently considered a priority to help by the law (the fact that the trafficker is a woman doesn't "disprove" that what she did is violence against women). We see that the rapist operates in a motel where there are undoubtedly many witnesses who clearly have not done anything to stop him or to help his victims. We see that the wife-beating child abuser is accosted by Rigg and Hoffman but the abuser's word is backed up and he is protected, and that even the abuser's wife, a victim herself, is too afraid to do anything but support him even though he is hurting a child- reflecting how many women are silent because they know they will not believed. The horror is that with the way the legal system works Hoffman can do more to help abused women as a serial killer than he ever did as a detective.

But then, of course, Hoffman wouldn't have been the serial killer he became if he hadn't been a detective first, and the fact that he was a detective was something utilized by him and John in their endeavors. And even if he saved lives of vulnerable women and girls like his sister by getting rid of Seth Baxter and those people in IV, he still helped John do the same thing those people did to other women- and then did the same thing on his own. With these similar systems, there are similar results. We remember John sent Addison to her torture and death for being a sex worker, with Hoffman's help, further comparing and illuminating the similarities between John's work and the legal system. We see that Hoffman's resentment of Amanda (based in her similarities to Angelina, even their names point this out) that led to him orchestrating her death may have been met with disapproval by John, but was ultimately enabled by his actions, because John thought further torturing Amanda for her trauma, addiction, and self harm was not only correct but helpful. Maybe Hoffman thought he really was "helping" Sidney by putting her in the trap that enabled her to kill her abusive boyfriend, maybe he really did think this was a way of doing what he couldn't do for his sister. But ultimately, if he did help anyone, he did much more harm. Ultimately, Amanda was right. It's all bullshit- the Jigsaw ideology doesn't "save" anyone, just perpetuates the cycle.

[malaierba]

Man I love sibling dynamics so much though.

Fully just projecting what I like to read, but it would be incredible if, inspired by the Touden, Toshiro arrived at his house with a newfound determination to improve his relationship with his siblings.

Which has, of course, mixed results.

(ended up blabbing about what I think their relationship is like and what it would be like if Toshiro came back with the crazy idea in his head of, hey, let's be actual brothers)

Basically I think Toshiyuki doesn't get it and fights it every step of the way. Can see him having some weird unsolved frustrations towards Toshiro? There's the one (1) silly comic we have on him, "how come my big brother gets a team of all sexy women he doesn't even enjoy it" (paraphrasing hard), which to me reads like... Okay so he can read Toshiro kind of well? But he doesn't understand him in the slightest.

Which is INCREDIBLE.

I think Toshiyuki is in a very particular position in his family. There's a 13 year age gap if I'm not wrong, kind of big, isn't it? I've seen it theorised that maybe the Nakamoto parents kept having babies die after birth, an idea supported by the fact that Toshiro was canonically a sickly child.

When I learned about his brothers and their ages though, and how dismissive Toshiro's dad is of them, how he calls all of them dull... How at age 26 Toshiro is still unmarried and isn't being pressured to marry (To be fair this could be a rare sympathetic decision from Toshitsugu. Maybe he wanted to marry Maizuru but couldn't, so instead he's giving his children the liberty of marrying who they want whenever they want).

To be honest? What I thought was: ah, so Toshitsugu married his actual wife over Maizuru likely because it was a marriage of convenience. Originally he only wanted a kid out of the union so he'd take over the household eventually, but then Toshiro turned out all sickly and soft and introverted, so eventually he was like, FINE, we need a backup inheritor.

Which, man, sucks for Toshiro AND Toshiyuki. I mean, Toshiro is 26!!!! You'd think it wouldn't be a contest! But they're literally making him prove himself against his siblings who are 13 and 11??? That sends a very clear message to me, and it's not one of trust.

Anyway. I think that'd make Toshiyuki a bit... Weird about his brother. Aware that he's messing up somehow, but also he's so strong and adult, literally has 13 years of experience on him. Like he's living on his shadow, but also is expected to step out of it.

Middle sibling complex? No way, something worse. Back up eldest sibling. Made especially evident by the fact that when Ryoko Kui introduces the relationship of the Nakamoto siblings she says there's "a weird distance between Toshiro and them".

I can see Toshiyuki having more experience being an older brother to Toshizane than Toshiro. Better? Not sure...? But, he probably was there for him more. Probably even trained with him

Which is FUNNY because I get THE SOFTEST OF VIBES FROM TOSHIZANE. I don't wanna say "Toshiro 2.0" but??

Look at his little face. Compare it to Toshiyuki, then to baby Toshiro.

Filial resentment my beloved. This would be one of the first actions that Toshiro takes without being ordered or promoted by someone else, which would both be meaningful and BIZARRE to Toshiyuki.

Oh, I hope they have an argument lol. Or at least that Toshiyuki gets to yell about how things are from his perspective.

Anyways, with that in mind, I think Toshiro would have an easier time bonding with Toshizane. Again, wistful thinking, but if he really has that same softness that Toshiro had... And if he's around someone like Toshiyuki, who probably can't relate and is probably being too Toshizane like how Hien was to Toshiro:

You know, "toughen up", well meaning advice, they ARE in the family's shady, shady business. But, it likely did cause a wedge between Toshiro and Hien eventually, him not knowing how to deal with her bluntness so instead he distances himself.

That, plus the fact that one of the main things that attracted him to Falin was realising that she was an adult that had managed to hold onto her childhood softness and oddity...

Yeah, I think that if he noticed history potentially repeating itself in Toshizane he'd think about intervening. And since this imagine is about Toshiro going back home, committing to being more proactive, then in this story he does reach out, tries to be the adult he would've liked to have in his life for his baby brother

Which of course! May annoy Toshiyuki! Why is Toshizane picking sides like that!? (He's not) Are you trying to steal him, Toshiro!!?!? (He's not!)

Anyway, fun fun fun.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

https://www.tumblr.com/mokkamicci/708045503336775680/kataang-vs-zutara-a-small-chat

This accidentally came up on my dash so I thought I’d give it a read and you know what? They were so close - so gosh darn close - to making a couple of really good points, but they kept losing it. I was willing to hear them out, but they lost me when they started talking about Aang’s character traits.

Honestly, I think you're being too kind. I see someone who is not okay with harrassment, but that is perfectly happy living in an echo-chamber where the only thing that exists is their alternative version of Avatar in which Katara never liked Aang and he was terrible, and, more importantly, an alternative reality in which the poor zutarians are just "fighting back" against the evil Kataang fans by *checks notes* accusing them of pedophilia, rape apologism, racism, and misogyny for shipping Kataang instead of zutara, and thus using that as justification for doxxing and sending rape/death threats.

(Seriously, the dick sucking and constant "BUT I DO LOVE OUR OBVIOUSLY SUPERIOR SHIP" after the tiniest criticism is the biggest proof of the zutara fandom having some serious issues. Even zutarians are scared of speaking out against their so-called friends because they KNOW these fuckers are unstable and impossible to reason with).

Aang is a child that wants to have fun instead of fighting a war - a responsibility that he never asked for and has no way of rejecting. He feels trapped because he is, and that upsets him. That's his only "immaturity."

The most selfish we've seen him be was when he hid the map to their dad from Katara and Sokka, because he was afraid THEY were going to leave him - because they were the only 'family' he had left, and he was scared of being all alone. He still realized what he did was wrong and confessed. He wasn't caught, he decided, of his own free will, to tell the truth and suffer the consequences.

And I gotta laugh whenever Zutarians pretend AANG was the character that had trouble putting people's needs before his own, not their "perfect", beloved Zuko, who literally let his uncle go to prison just so he could be on Ozai's good graces again - Ozai is literally the ONLY person Zuko always put before himself, and that's why he ended up trapped in that abusive situation for so long: he was constantly distancing himself from people that could help, because they weren't saying what he wanted to hear.

The only thing that's funnier is their insistence that Kataang is one-sided despite plenty of evidence that Katara liked Aang back, meanwhile they insist zutara is canon when neither character was explicitly stated or implied to have feelings for the other.

So much for "Zutara fans criticise the Kataang ship with logic and facts." If that shit is logic and facts, I don't even wanna know what lies and nonsense would look like.

[miles-harding]

much appreciation for the amazing show of love i've seen for electric dreams in the past year alone but i think it's worth remembering that the characterization of edgar as a 'devil character' is deeply nuanced, even for a cult-classic theatrical flop like electric dreams (1984). the story is literally based on cyrano de bergerac (man who is very romantic falling head over heels for a woman he thinks is unattainable to him and a more-attractive middleman uses his words so that the woman won't hate or fear him because he thinks he's hideous, which is sort of hilariously way more depth than a film of this caliber even really needs, but it does possess, and that elevates it significantly as a romance film tbh... imo)...

the 'edgar with devil horns' representation for the usamerican theatrical release film poster is like a 'sexy' version of that lmao... like, it's supposed to be promiscuous, there are promotions including old vhs sleeves that literally say 'edgar is horny'. he's cheeky and throws tantrums and he doesn't really know how to talk to people. he's only a 'devil' in the way that a kitty cat is a devil... just so happens, in this case, it's a brat-coded sentient computer.

i honestly don't know why very basic things like this make people so irrationally upset but like. please... no one said edgar is evil. edgar is one of the few cases of a sentient AI or object character who does a bunch of mischief screwing with a human's life and relationships and it's all fine in the end because the sentient AI gets to live (in almost a higher form of existence unrestrained by physicality... remember how badly edgar just wanted to be a thing that feels? now edgar can do whatever edgar wants, despite not having a physical form, actually getting to live out the liberating side of not having a physical for) and the other two protagonists of course live, and they have a life afterward.

with other media like wargames, we of course have an innocent (somewhat) sentient computer who genuinely might cause the nuclear apocalypse, because he thought he was playing toys with his dad. but in the end, after the protagonists live their lives, joshua the wopr is still property of the military. in the colossus series, which is a subversion of frankenstein, the creator dr. forbin eventually does come to love colossus like a child, only for that child to then die, the world sort of absolving it of its past transgressions or mistakes against humans while ruling over them. we call AM evil, for the cruel and unusual things he does to his human playthings, but the case can still be made about a very powerful being having so much power but not the power to lift themself out of the situation in which they are trapped (same can be said for other AI like shodan or glados), so they lash out. of course, famously, everyone calls hal 9000 evil. but even in kubrick's adaptation, which was written in party by sir clarke himself, we actually see zero evidence of hal being characterized as evil, this characterization manifested in the perceptions of the audience, siding solely with scared astronauts who fear being controlled, rather than recognizing that hal, too, is a crew member being controlled... by humans, who are also using him to control his crewmates, his friends.

electric dreams really is a fairytale for computers, but it is also a tragedy. it's the fairytale-ification of an actual, classical tragedy. when rusty lemorande wrote the screenplay, he was basing a lot of the film's socio-computer-centric story on his experiences as a lonely person who had just moved to a new city, but who had only ever spent time with the computer as a vehicle for social communication... shutting himself out from the possibilities of meeting others. but even despite this, despite madeline's quips that could be misconstrued as being less than sympathetic to the idea of a sentient AI ("since when is talking a sign of intelligence?"), the film was literally dedicated to the univac-1? it gave edgar a happy ending? it had a dual meaning? it did so much more than take the "AI character bad, human good" approach which is something that is strikingly rare in the AI-subgenre of scifi. there was a lot of nuance baked into it. all 3 protagonists had their own bubble and inner world that overlapped with each other's bubbles. you know what i mean? the film managed to define edgar not as an antagonist but as a kind of trapped protagonist. this isn't a good vs. evil story, there is no evil in edgar. this is a people vs. people story about relationships, really, and learning to know what's good for us. like it's seriously very well-rounded with each character's respective arcs.

sometimes it's so disheartening not to see films these days with the same or larger budgets doing even half as much with their story as electric dreams did. it's very widely beloved as a cult classic for a reason, and that reason is that it succeeded at executing a story about relationships. like. 'we drive each other crazy' but in different ways. perhaps the only thing that could've made it better was a far more ambitious electric-polycule ending endorsing bisexual polyamory lol but we got all but that, explicitly, technically...