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leona-hawthorne · 2 months ago

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LEONA-HAWTHORNE’S FICMAS

december 7th. mattheo riddle — love potion.

mattheo riddle x reader

summary ; when he’s all over you after a love potion gone wrong… aka pussydrunk!mattheo words ; 3.3k warnings ; smut, oral (f receiving), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, kissing, nipple sucking, swearing

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You barely registered the weight of him collapsing onto the worn leather couch beside you before his hands were reaching for yours, clumsy and sure all at once. His curls were wild, his tie hanging loose around his neck, and his eyes—merlin, his eyes—were soft and unfocused, tracing your face like he was committing every detail to memory.

“You smell so good,” he murmured, his voice thick and honey-slow, like the words had been dipped in sugar. His nose brushed the side of your neck as he leaned in closer, the faint scent of chocolate and cedar lingering on his skin. “Like… I don’t even know. Just you.”

You froze, heat flooding your cheeks as you tried to process what the hell was happening. “Mattheo, are you drunk?”

He pulled back slightly, blinking at you with an almost childlike confusion, his lips curving into a crooked grin. “Not drunk,” he whispered. “Just…completely, utterly—” He sighed dreamily, his head falling against your shoulder. “Gone for you.”

Your book slipped from your lap, thudding against the floor, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You stared down at him, utterly bewildered, as he buried his face in the crook of your neck with a contented hum.

This was not normal. Mattheo didn’t do dreamy or loopy or any of this. He was sharp edges and biting sarcasm, a bundle of contradictions wrapped in leather and cigarette smoke. And yet, here he was, clinging to you like you were the only thing keeping him tethered to the earth.

It wasn’t until his fingers began absentmindedly tracing patterns on your knee that the pieces clicked into place.

It started two days ago, in Slughorn’s Potions class. Extra credit was practically a lifeline for you, so when he’d offered it for creating “innovative applications of potion theory,” you’d jumped at the chance. The result? A batch of chocolate truffles laced with a mild love potion—just strong enough to evoke fondness and infatuation in the eater. Slughorn had been delighted, declaring your concoction “a stroke of brilliance.”

But the love potion had a catch: it required a strand of DNA from the intended target to work. In this case, your own hair had made its way into the mix.

You’d left the chocolates on Slughorn’s desk after class, only to find them gone by the next morning. At the time, you hadn’t thought much of it. But now…

“Mattheo,” you said slowly, trying to untangle yourself from his grip. “Did you eat any chocolate recently?”

He looked up at you, his brown eyes shining with unrestrained affection. “Mmm, yeah. Some girl gave them to me. Said they were a gift.”

Of course. Of bloody course.

You sighed, gently prying his hands off you as he pouted. “Mattheo, those weren’t for you. They were part of an assignment, and—”

“Doesn’t matter,” he interrupted, his voice a low murmur. His hand found yours again, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “Best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

Your heart did an embarrassing little flip at the sincerity in his voice, but you shoved it aside. This wasn’t real—it couldn’t be. It was just the potion talking.

“Mattheo, listen to me,” you said firmly, meeting his gaze. “This isn’t you. It’s the potion. It’ll wear off in a few hours, and then you’ll—”

“No,” he said softly, cutting you off again. “It’s not just the potion.”

Your breath caught. “What?”

His hand slid down to rest just below the hem of your skirt, and his face inched closer, his lips brushing your ear.

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathed, the words tumbling from his lips as though they’d been locked in his chest, yearning to escape. His voice was low, reverent, thick with desire. “I—I’ve always wanted… this.”

Before you could respond, his mouth claimed yours in a searing kiss, urgent and consuming, like a man starving for his first taste of salvation. His lips moved against yours with fervent precision, soft yet commanding, coaxing a needy whimper from deep in your throat.

You melted into him, your arms curling around his neck as he deepened the kiss. His tongue swept into your mouth, tangling with yours in a sensual, desperate dance that left you breathless. When he nipped at your lower lip, the sting was fleeting, soothed instantly by a gentle, teasing lick before he plunged back into the kiss.

His hands roamed over you, slow yet deliberate, mapping every curve with a reverence that made your heart race. Fingers glided down the line of your spine, dipping beneath your shirt to stroke the bare skin at the small of your back. His touch was electric, each graze igniting sparks that radiated through your body. When his hands slid lower, palming your hips, you gasped softly, arching into him instinctively.

The kiss broke only for his lips to blaze a trail down your neck, nibbling and sucking at the delicate skin there, leaving behind faint marks that bloomed like fire beneath his touch. He moved to your jaw, his mouth brushing over the sensitive ridge with maddening gentleness, only to return to the hollow of your throat, where he lingered, his warm breath sending shivers through you.

As his hands slipped beneath your shirt, pushing it upward with quiet urgency, the soft swells of your breasts were bared to his smoldering gaze. He paused, drinking in the sight with an expression so raw and unguarded it made your knees weak.

“God, you’re fucking gorgeous,” he muttered hoarsely before diving in. His lips closed around one hardened peak, his tongue swirling in slow circles as he suckled. A soft moan escaped you, your back arching into him as your fingers found their way into his curls, tugging gently.

His free hand cupped your other breast, thumb brushing over the sensitive underside before teasing the nipple, his touch so light and precise it sent jolts of pleasure racing through you.

“Mattheo…” you breathed, your voice trembling, thick with desire. His name was a plea, a confession, a surrender. You could feel the press of his body against yours—the hard, unyielding planes of his chest and abdomen in stark, tantalizing contrast to the softness of your curves.

He released your nipple with a wet pop, his dark eyes locking onto yours as he shifted to lavish the same attention on the other side. You bit your lip, desperate to stifle the moan threatening to spill from you as your hips instinctively rocked against him, seeking relief from the mounting ache between your thighs.

When his lips finally left your skin, you felt bereft, aching for the contact he had so willingly given. Driven by need, you tried to climb into his lap, but Mattheo’s hands stopped you, firm but gentle, one resting on your hip, the other cradling your cheek.

“Wait,” he murmured, his voice thick, rough with restraint. “Let me…”

With that, he sank to his knees before you, his hands sliding up your thighs with agonizing slowness, brushing the hem of your skirt higher until his thumbs grazed the waistband of your panties. His gaze burned into you, his voice low and rasping when he spoke. “Tell me what you want, sweetheart,” he said, his warm breath fanning over your skin. “I’m yours to command.”

His words sent a shiver down your spine, a jolt of heat pooling low in your belly. Your fingers found his curls again, tugging lightly, guiding him closer as a teasing smile curved your lips.

“Took you long enough to realize that,” you teased, your voice soft, edged with playful defiance.

Mattheo chuckled, a low, wicked sound that vibrated against your inner thigh. “Patience has never been my virtue,” he admitted, his words muffled against your skin as he peppered slow, lingering kisses along your thighs.

His face nuzzled against you, his nose brushing the dampened fabric of your underwear as he inhaled deeply, savoring you. Then his tongue flattened against the cloth, dragging torturously slowly over the heat of you, the thin barrier between you doing nothing to muffle the sensation.

“Fuck,” you whispered, hips tilting forward in silent, desperate encouragement.

Mattheo obliged, his lips closing over you as he sucked gently at your puffy lips through the fabric. Then he hooked his fingers into the waistband of your panties, dragging the thin fabric down your legs in a torturously slow motion that made your pulse race.

Once you were completely bare before him, his hungry gaze roamed over your glistening folds, before he spread you open with two fingers, exposing your slick, swollen flesh. He leaned in, dragging his tongue along your slit in a slow, languid stroke that tore a whimper from your lips.

“Fuck,” he murmured against your trembling skin, his voice thick and husky. “You taste even better than I imagined.”

He didn’t wait for a response, diving back in with reckless abandon. His tongue circled your clit with maddening precision, alternating between feather-light flicks and firm, deliberate pressure that had you gasping his name like a prayer.

“Mattheo… oh gods…” you choked out, your fingers tangling in his curls, tugging sharply as he worked you into a frenzy. His hands gripped your thighs, his strong fingers sinking into the supple flesh as he maneuvered your legs over his broad shoulders.

“Fuckin’ perfect,” he growled between kisses, his breath hot against your drenched core. “Such a sweet little cunt.”

His tongue plunged into you without warning, fucking your tight, clenching heat in a rhythm that matched the frantic pounding of your heart.

“Faster… please,” you begged, your voice a broken plea as you ground your hips against his face, chasing the release that loomed just out of reach.

Mattheo growled his approval, his hands tightening on your thighs as he obeyed, doubling his efforts. His tongue moved with punishing speed, thrusting in and out of your dripping heat while his nose brushed against your swollen clit, each movement pushing you closer to the precipice.

When his lips closed around your clit with brutal intensity, the coil inside you snapped. Your orgasm ripped through you like a violent storm, shattering you into a million pieces as your body convulsed in pure ecstasy.

Mattheo didn’t stop. Even as you trembled and bucked against him, he continued his assault, his mouth and tongue relentless as they dragged every last aftershock from your trembling body. His lips and chin were drenched in your essence, and the musky, heady scent of your arousal seemed to drive him into a frenzy.

He angled his head, delving deeper with his tongue, his strokes long and firm as if determined to wring every ounce of pleasure from you. His grip on your thighs tightened, the bruising pressure grounding you as your body jerked and twitched uncontrollably.

You let out a choked sob, tears pricking the corners of your eyes as the overwhelming sensations pushed you further. It was too much, yet somehow not enough—everything you needed, all at once, leaving you raw and undone beneath his unrelenting touch.

“Can’t get enough of you,” he rasped, his voice muffled and rough.

The world blurred around the edges, your vision hazy and your body trembling uncontrollably. All that existed was Mattheo—his mouth, his hands, and the electric firestorm of sensation he’d ignited in you.

Mattheo groaned deeply, the sound reverberating against your sensitive flesh and sending another jolt of pleasure through your overstimulated body. His fingers dug into the plush flesh of your inner thighs, spreading you even wider, holding you open for his devouring mouth. His tongue curled around your swollen bud, flicking and sucking with a desperate intensity, while his other hand slid lower. Two fingers pressed against your entrance, teasing for the briefest moment before plunging into you to the knuckle.

The stretch was delicious, a perfect complement to the maddening rhythm of his mouth. Your moans spilled freely, loud and desperate, your voice cracking as you gasped for air. “Fuck! Please, I can’t—” you wailed, trying to close your thighs, your hands tugging weakly at his head in a futile attempt to create distance.

Mattheo growled against your core, his grip unyielding as he anchored you in place. “Oh, yes, you can,” he rasped, his voice thick with lust and determination, his breath hot against your drenched folds. “And you will.”

Lost in the intoxicating taste of you, he buried himself even deeper, his fingers curling upward, dragging against your inner walls in a way that made your entire body quake.

“Mattheo!” you whined, your voice hoarse as the pressure built rapidly, coiling impossibly tight in your belly. He felt the way your walls clenched around his fingers, the desperate flutter signaling your impending release, and he doubled down.

The dual stimulation proved too much to withstand. Your climax hit you like a lightning strike, blinding and all-consuming, your pussy gripping his fingers with an almost punishing force.

Mattheo groaned again, savoring every shudder, every broken whimper that spilled from your lips. He drank you in like a man starved, his tongue lapping up your release as though it were a precious elixir. His own cock throbbed painfully against the rough confines of his jeans, the ache only spurring him to continue.

Even as your orgasm began to ebb, Mattheo didn’t relent. His fingers kept pumping into your fluttering heat, coaxing out every last ripple of pleasure while his lips sealed around your clit. He suckled greedily, tongue swirling in slow, deliberate circles that had your oversensitive body twitching uncontrollably.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he muttered against your soaked skin, his voice ragged but reverent. He didn’t care that his breath came in short, uneven pants; the sheer need to taste more of you consumed him.

Your hands clutched weakly at his hair, trying to tug him away, but Mattheo was lost to the haze of lust and obsession. He couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop, not until you were utterly spent, until your body was reduced to a limp, satisfied puddle beneath him.

He drove his fingers deeper, angling them to hit that sensitive spot inside you that made your legs jerk and your cries escalate into desperate, breathless sobs.

“Mattheo… too much…” you gasped, your voice trembling, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as you teetered on the edge of unbearable pleasure.

He merely hummed in response, the vibrations dragging you into another devastating high. Your release hit with even greater intensity, your body wracked with shuddering spasms as he milked you of every last ounce of bliss.

Even then, Mattheo didn’t let up. He licked and sucked at your oversensitive flesh, devouring you with single-minded determination, his face and chin slick with your arousal.

His face was a picture of unrestrained lust and satisfaction, his dark eyes locking onto yours with a wicked gleam. “I’m not done with you yet,” he said, his voice dripping with promise, his lips curling into a sinful smirk as he leaned in for more.

Your body felt utterly boneless, every nerve alight and trembling as Mattheo continued his merciless assault. Pleasure and exhaustion warred within you, your mind a haze as you struggled to grasp the sheer force of your release. He’d unraveled you completely, pulling sensations from depths you hadn’t known existed.

Tears streaked your flushed cheeks, your hips rolling involuntarily, a primal search for friction despite the screaming protest of your muscles.

"Mattheo... I can't," you choked out, your voice barely more than a breathless whimper, trembling with raw vulnerability. But he didn’t stop—he didn’t even falter.

“Can’t stop,” Mattheo growled, his voice guttural, almost feral, as his tongue flicked over your swollen clit. “You’re too fuckin’ sweet. I’m not done. Just give me one more.”

“Please,” you whimpered, though your body betrayed you, arching into his mouth as his lips sealed around your sensitive bud once more.

His movements became messy, wild, every lick and suck driven by pure, unrestrained hunger. The wet, obscene sounds of his mouth working against your soaked sex filled the air, mingling with the raw cries spilling from your lips.

His free hand slid upward, cupping your breast through your clothes, kneading it with rough, possessive squeezes that bordered on desperation.

The ache in his jeans was unbearable now, pre-cum soaking the denim as his cock throbbed with every moan, every tremor of your body beneath him. Yet Mattheo didn’t stop to ease his own suffering—he was consumed by you, intoxicated by the heady scent of your arousal and the way your body responded to him.

“Mattheo,” you sobbed, nails tearing into the cushion beneath you as you fought to anchor yourself. But there was no escape from the storm he’d unleashed.

The tension inside you snapped violently, and your fourth orgasm tore through you like a tidal wave, stealing the very air from your lungs. Your back arched off the couch, lips parted in a silent scream as pleasure consumed you utterly.

When he finally pulled away, your body slumped against the cushions, utterly spent and quivering. His chest heaved as he looked down at you, his lips and chin glistening with evidence of his unrelenting hunger.

A string of saliva clung to his swollen lips, connecting them to your slick folds as he licked his mouth clean with a satisfied hum. His dark, fevered gaze roamed your form, taking in the sight of your flushed skin, tear-streaked cheeks, and trembling thighs.

Mattheo looked utterly primal, his expression a perfect blend of satisfaction and raw, unbridled desire. But as his eyes dipped to the insistent bulge straining against his jeans, it was clear your night was far from over.

ficmas taglist: @winnie1emon @ur-local-wizard @satosugu4-ever @ankoluvs @superstargirll @slytherin-princess-x @abeoavita @mattheoriddle101 @georgiastars13 @smoooore @mattheoriddles-sluttt @2dloveshp @mattysprincess @catching-fire-in-the-wind @revesephemeres @esmerai-artemis @clar2aa @iamaconfusedpan

#mattheo riddle #slytherin boys #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle x y/n #mattheo riddle x you #mattheo riddle smut #mattheo riddle fluff #harry potter #slytherin #mattheo riddle fanfic #benjamin wadsworth #smut #fluff #ficmas #leona-hawthorne ficmas

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pepperyduck · 4 months ago

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“parenting class” with kei tsukishima

this is part six of my kinktober event :3

word count: 1.5k

warnings: nsfw, timeskip tsukishima, breeding, talks about pregnancy, tsukki is maybe a little bit bad!, finishing inside, unprotected p in v. 18+ mdni!

notes: who tf was gonna tell me pregnancy scares are real

kinktober masterlist | masterlist

kei tsukishima didn’t know what had come over him.

personally, he blamed that stupid parenting class that was required, for some reason. kei thought it was idiotic, but he needed it to graduate. and they absolutely doomed him when they put both of you in class together.

there was something about you, his sweet, beautiful and kind girlfriend that had already won his heart a million times over, doing things that a mom would do. of course, they provided those dumb dolls that cried and stuff—but you seemed to be able to calm the robot baby down instantly. the smallest appearance of a smile came over his face when you’d bounce the doll in your arms, or feed it the fake food.

god forbid when they made you wear that horrible pregnancy vest, because it gave your boyfriend terribly amazing imagery of what you’d actually look like carrying his child. maybe he was weird for it, but after the few weeks of that class was over, kei couldn’t stop himself from only thinking about one thing;

getting you pregnant.

he hadn’t ever been the dad type, until now.

“do you want kids?” tsukishima had asked you, all the while focused on a homework assignment. the question was one you hadn’t talked about before. it took you by surprise, obviously, and you wondered if it was something your tsukki wanted, too.

“if you want them, yeah.”

and that reply is what led kei to his current position, deciding between two ways the both of your lives could go. but as you laid there in his dorm room, trapped under his arms, all the excuses he could make for what he was about to do ran through his head. both of you were adults, set to graduate college in a few months, along with jobs lined up the second you got your diplomas. he already had a ring for you, he’d decided he was going to marry you a long time ago—

what did he have to lose?

“are you okay? you seem out of it, tsukki,” you say, running your fingers through your boyfriend’s blond locks. you had been waiting for a few minutes now, and all kei was doing was staring down at you, the look in his eyes gradually shifting over time.

“mhm.” is the only reply you get out of him, but he finally starts to move his eyes up and down your face, skimming over your lips and soft cheeks. kei felt like he could moan aloud when you wrap your arms behind his neck and lean up to give him a small peck.

he loved how sweet you were to him, a stark contrast in his own personality. he was never one to show affection in many ways, but you made up for it with the amount of affection you gave him. you had kei wrapped around your little finger, and boy, did he know it.

wrapping your legs around his waist, you pull kei in impossibly closer, the warmth in between your legs now was prodded at by the tent in your boyfriend’s boxers. kei harshly sucks air through his teeth at the pressure, absentmindedly rutting against you, feeling your panties and the dampness behind them, absolutely soaked. kei could tell.

“i don’t have a condom,” he remarks, subtly watching how you’d react.

“oh—um, it’s okay,” you reply almost instantaneously, “i’m on birth control, tsukki.”

damn it.

tsukishima nods his head, leaning up to allow space for the both of you to strip away the clothing that was keeping him from being inside of you. scooting back on the bed, you allow him room to join you. kei climbs up on the mattress with you, slotting himself between your already spread thighs, cock immediately pressing against the warm wetness of your cunt. you whine at the teasing, though it isn’t intentional, and kei hushes your noises with a sweet kiss.

as your lips lock and your skin becomes warmer at your lover’s contact, kei’s slender hands come to grab under your thighs, situating you in a rather unexplored position—a mating press. his head draws back again, just to take in the sight of you; in his shirt, and rather everything else completely exposed to him. the small light coming from his desk lamp illuminates you perfectly, shows off how soft you are to kei, the perfect body to carry his kids—

“kei,” you whine, “are you sure you’re okay?” your question is half concern and half desperation, wanting him to either move or tell you he isn’t horny; though, the raging erection he has would say otherwise. “if you don’t wanna do it, we don’t have to—oh!”

your rambling is cut off by a harsh thrust inside, kei wasting no time to completely insert himself into you. he was never one to be too rough, maybe a little erratic, but never completely silent and impatient. you can tell there is no patience left in your boyfriend, with how he immediately begins a grueling, fast pace, slamming his length into you with unrelenting force. your pretty little brain, usually so sweet and composed, has no time to think about what’s got him so worked up, because he has you yelping out within only a few seconds.

“kei—kei!” you chant his name, it’s falling off your lips like a routine prayer, stuck on loop like a broken record.

kei’s knees dig into the fabric of his sheets, his thighs completely straightened, and it feels like he is using every bit of strength to wind his hips up and violently slam them back into you. becoming so fond of this position, you can feel him in new depths, as the slit of his cock taps – no, angrily impales – your cervix. he’s no longer calculated, or sweet, whatever had gotten into kei had made the man completely animalistic.

syrupy, soaked walls clamp around his length ridiculously tighter with every meeting of your hips, and you mewl. the first remnants of sweat creep on your boyfriend’s hairline, his glasses are beginning to slip down his nose, he’s almost silently panting. when your eyes aren’t squeezed shut, you can see the blank, mean expression settled on tsukishima’s features; it wasn’t a softened version of his face like normal.

“feels s’good, tsukki!” you manage to stammer out, arms flailing to the pillow you rested your head on to hold.

“yeah?” followed by a grunt is the only reply, the only words tsukki has given you the entire interaction. he usually liked to tease you, or have more remarks when you babbled on about how good he felt. but no, not now. not when he could feel himself getting closer from the death grip your pussy has on him, not when he can feel himself about to knock you up. “look at me.”

your eyes shoot open, despite the signals from your body telling you to keep them closed, lose yourself in the pleasure. you wouldn’t dare to disobey your boyfriend, not like this. so, of course, you lock your eyes with his, his cock still bullying its way deeper into you. kei savors the scrunched up, dirty look on your face, that of one he hasn’t seen before.

were you enjoying this that much? even if you didn’t know his intentions, were you finding pleasure in the thought of getting pregnant now, by him?

“i’m gonna finish inside,” kei states, and it’s not a request, nor a demand. it’s a simple statement, something he is going to do. you’re able to notice the passion, the need in his voice. and you think, for just a moment, that you understand his intentions.

however, the rough pounding he’s giving you leaves no time for thought.

“mm—finish in me, tsukki,” you motivate him, trying your damnedest to maintain the eye contact with him, “m’gonna cum too!” your voice pitches higher, and kei’s sure whoever’s trying to sleep on the other side of the wall probably hates him right now. but he doesn’t really care, no. he’s determined.

“yeah? close, hmm?” tsukishima teases, finally, in between heavy pants. you nod your head pathetically, not even asking for permission as you clench around him again and cum all over his cock. he’s learned you so well, he can tell when you cum, and he only speeds up the pace of his thrusting to fuck you through it.

at the sound of your pretty noises, kei loses himself, letting the feeling inside snap. thick, white ropes of his cum fly out and stick to your insides, you can feel the extra warmth from it all—it’s hotter than your insides, somehow. even as his pace slows, the thrusts remain just as hard; fucking into you all the way, he’s overstimulating the both of you. all for his greedy, reckless desires.

something had gotten into kei tsukishima, and he knew what it was now. it was all an insatiable, needy scratch inside his brain, only to be helped when in a few weeks, you take that plastic test in the bathroom of his dorm, and those two pink lines show up. he’d only be helped then.

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader smut #kei tsukishima #tsukishima kei #kei tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x reader #kei tsukishima smut

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marsdql · 1 month ago

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𓍯𓂃𓏧♡ p. childhood boyfriend!sim jaeyun ⤫ 𝘧𝘦𝘮!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳﹒wc: 9.2к﹒g. romantic drama, emotional romance, angst, slowburn, light fluff﹒cw. emotional distress, ghosting and abandonment, suidical thoughts, mental health struggles, manipulation, past trauma, reconciliation and healing, triggers of emotional abuse, toxicity, high levels of angst and emotional intensity, mild references to past toxic relationships. @wheretheheckis-ssaki

𓏲 ๋࣭ ࣪ ˖ synopsis ﹒During middle school, you and a boy in your friend’s class—named Sim Jaeyun—were inseparable, you both had your own friendg roup, he was a popular guy on the soccer team while you were a normal girl, yet would talk to each other on the phone everyday the second the bell rang. You both eventually fell for each other but had to keep your relationship private due to drama with girls. A year later—after everyone found out about you guys, he unexpectedly distanced—then disappeared. 10 years later, when you move to France for a few weeks due to a project in uni, you and Jake cross paths once again. (NOT PROOFREAD)

Sim Jaeyun, he was the best boyfriend I could ever think of having, he was my first love, definitely. It started in the seventh grade, when he was in class 7G—the same class as my friends. I remember when my bestfriend first told me about how he’d catch people playing Roblox in class and signal it to the entire class—that’s when I started teasing him—he was my best friends locker buddy, so I’d see him everyday.

Everytime id see him—when he would be arguing about something stupid with his classmates, I’ll snarl at him, “shut up Jake! Go play your Roblox!”. For some odd reason, he was REALLY talkative, but the second I’d say that, he’d just shut up. He’d smile at me and continue packing his things to get to the bus, forgetting about the entire conversation he had with the people next to him.

Until one day, another normal day of me telling him the same line, he actually responded this time. ‘How about you go play Roblox, huh?’ He said. ‘Okay, I will then, make sure you join me in jayjay simulator!!!’ I replied—I don’t know why I said “jayjay”, it just came out—soon enough, that would be the name all the girls would start calling him—because of me. As I walked away with my bestfriend—heading to the bus, I whispered to her, “hey, you know, Jake is kinda cute.”

— rest below cut ! —

Later that day, I decided to add him on my phone, message him—tease him a little bit more, he was funny—his reactions. He wasn’t like other boys, when you’d argue with him, he’d do it in a goofy way, he wouldn’t say actual harmful stuff—not to me Atleast.

- Jake: who is this?

- You: You didn’t join me in jayjay simulator. :(

- Jake: Hehe, yes I did!!!

He was so cute, even his messages were adorable. Whenever I’d playfully roleplay and fake random situations, people would call me childish, but with him, he’d play along, fully convincing eachother that everything we said was real.

I was determined to talk to this guy everyday, I’d find a random topic that has been spreading around our grade so that everyday, after school, I’d message him, using it as an excuse to talk to him. And it worked! I noticed that he’d even find some stuff too, so that he could message me. Once, he asked me for anime recommendations even though everyone knows him and his friendgroup hated anime, they made fun of it—except for blue lock of course—since it’s football related.

During my pe class, his friends that were in my class were destroying me in badminton—they weren’t that good…..but I just sucked at the sport! He peeked in, hoping to waste time from his class, and I screamed “Jake!!! Help me, your friends are bullying me…”

he was such a nice person to me, I’d tease him and say that he was rude in order to keep talking to him—in my mind, if I was accusing him of something, it’d be another reason for him to keep responding to me— and of course, it worked, I’m just a genius.

We were genuinely so funny, we both wanted to talk to eachother whenever we had the chance, but didn’t know how. Our biggest highlight was when we’d send random emojis to eachother for 4 hours straight just because we had no conversation anymore.

On February 14th, at the valentines dance, we were pressured to hug by the crowd. At this point, I had the biggest crush on him but nobody knew. Since he was popular and quiet talk compared to the other boys(puberty hit him the earliest), most of my friends fancied him. I was stuck, how could I tell my friends that I liked him first, when I never told them? Anyway, we didn’t hug, we’re both so awkward and to be honest, I’m glad we didn’t, it’s too cringe hugging like that!

When we got home, he messaged me, telling me he’s sorry he didn’t hug me because….. his teacher was watching and didn’t want him to tell his parents??? What a stupid excuse… That’s not the point, Y/n get back into the topic! I don’t remember how we got to the conversation but we were talking about crushes, who we liked. I kid you not, it took us 3 hours to confess, and it was so obvious we were saying we liked each other! We kept asking each other for hints, obvious ones. But eventually, we both said each others name at the same time. I remember so vividly that I was playing cards with my brother, unable to focus because of the joy I was feeling after reading my name pop up.

Now that I look back at it, I realize how mature we were for our age, even though we confessed, we didn’t do anything about it, we didn’t start dating or anything—just got really awkward, stopped talking in real life after that…

Fast forward the summer of 7th grade, when we got together July 2nd at 2am. To be honest, it wasn’t the way I expected it to be.

A girl from my grade messaged me:

- g/n: Hey! You’re close to Jake, right?

- You: Hi g/n! And yeah, I am, why?

- g/n: well… me and him have been messaging for 2 weeks now and I kinda like him. I was hoping you’d help me?

I beg your pardon? Me? Help you? I don’t even know this girl, all I knew was that she was some popular girl in a big friendgroup. That friendgroup was always around jake’s, they craved their attention so much—it disgusted me. But, it’s not like he’s my boyfriend, who am I to say no, maybe he likes her.

I helped her that entire night—telling her to text him certain things that only I knew he’d enjoy. They started doing the same thing me and him did on Valentine’s Day, guessing each other’s crushes, it took me aback, I self sabotaged myself—for no reason at all. During all of it, he was messaging me at the same time, acting a sweet to me. For no reason at all, he sent me this out of context message, “Y/n, I enjoy messaging you a lot.” Seconds later,

- g/n: He was taking too long to tell me his crush so I just told him I like him and asked if he wants to get together!

What? Did I just read that right… I acted as if I didn’t see her message and went to respond to jake’s instead. “Oh really?” I questioned him, my heart was beating so fast at this point, I didn’t know what was going to happen, it has been months and we’re still in a talking stage, surely he wouldn’t get with a girl he started talking to just 2 weeks ago, right? That’s what I thought until another message popped up.

- g/n: GIRL OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOU HE JUST SAID YES OMGOMG.

the second she said that, he responded to me, “yeah, I really do, you’re my favourite person to talk to.” Oh heck no. I’m hysterically sobbing—what the hell?

Okay I can’t do this deep detail stuff, fast forward again—he told me and the girl goodnight—well actually, he only told the girl goodnight, I’m the one who told him goodnight before he could say anything else because I was so close to blocking him. But, I couldn’t hold it in, I had to confront him.

- You: Jake, I know you’re not asleep, respond

- Jake: What’s up?

- You: Tell me now, who’s your crush?

- Jake: you already know who

- You: no I don’t, who is it

- Jake: you

- You: then why did you just ask out g/n?

- Jake: who told you

- You: it doesn’t matter who told me, answer me.

- Jake: I promise you I’ll tell you when you tell me who told you

I tried so hard to keep my composure, but I told him everything. Then, I asked him politely, “who do you want? Me or g/n?” no intention in making him choose between us, I genuinely wanted to know because I didn’t want to be lead on if he liked g/n—and I didn’t want g/n to be lead on in this relationship if he liked me. I never made him choose between us, I simply asked him who he liked because he just agreed to dating a girl 2 hours ago and is now telling me he likes me, anyone in my situation would’ve done that, right?

- Jake: you I pick you

- Jake: I want you

- Jake: I’m so sorry I was just desperate for someone and I thought you liked one of my friends at this point, I was so desperate I just agreed to her.

We got together right after he broke up with her the following morning—maybe it was kind of stupid of us to do it so soon, but we were both waiting in eachother since the day we confessed all those months ago, it was summer, everything felt right, we had a huge conversation that night and talked about eachother and all our hidden secrets til 4am. In that conversation, we also made it clear that we would keep our relationship private because he had friends who liked me and I also had multiple who liked him.

Riingg ! — back into reality.

8:00am, you get up, brush your teeth, and your hair, wear a basic outfit you barely looked at before picking, and walk to the train station—waiting a few minutes for it to arrive.

There goes your alarm, woah, you just experienced your entire love story with Jake again, in a dream—you almost thought it was real. You're now 22, can’t believe that all happend 10 years ago. It feels as if it happend yesterday. Although, a lot has changed since then, You're not the same as before, you arent in middle school, or high school at all—but rather studying medicine in one of your dream universities. Your personality has changed a lot, the way you act has matured a lot aswell—you now know that you don’t need to be a brat in order to get people’s attention, hah…

Although your life has changed, the place to where your mind wanders hasn’t. You still remember the time you and Jake risked a day to go on a field trip downtown to a haunted house in the 8th grade—right after summer. You remember all the stares you got as you walked together—not even holding hands or anything, just simply walking. Everyone would ship you guys together—yet got so mad when they suspected that you two were dating.

A few days—not even—a few hours after the field trip, pictures of me and him were spreader everywhere. I was officially done for. My friends had left me a little before it all, I was already dealing with that loss—and now, I had to deal with the entire population of girls in my grade hating on me—simply for hanging out with a friend everyone knew I was close to.

I just didn’t get it. Everyone would ship us, everyone knew we were close, we didn’t even kiss—or hold hands—or hug—or anything! Why did everyone get so mad? They didn’t know or get the confirmation that we were dating—so why did I get ignored by everyone so secretively? Nobody talked to me about it, rumours spread about me and only me—about Jake—just me. The worse thing was, I didn’t have a say in anything. Nobody could say anything to my face, it was all behind my back, nobody dared to say anything while I was around, I never found out what they said—only small details of my last remaining friends that would overhear small stuff from crowds.

That’s basically how my entire 8th grade was like. I know some people would see it as a compliment that nobody could say anything to my friend—not even humiliate or bully me for it, but I felt as if it was the biggest curse ever. I never had a chance to speak about it, talk my feelings.

The worse part is—Jake said it was going to be okay, he didn’t care about what people thought about us. But just a month after the entire incident—he ghosted me for two weeks, came back to say sorry then did it again for two weeks. Then, it became a month and came back later to talk about how he was moving to France at the end of the year. I knew about it already, I was the only person he told, but it felt so much wise because he was talking about it during a period where he was just constantly ghosting me.

It was soon going to be his birthday so I decided to send him a huge paragraph:

I’ve deleted every single person off my Snapchat to make sure we keep that “you and Jake have been each other's number one best friend for 2 months!” Even though it’s been almost a year since we had it, you know it only changes from 2 weeks, 2 months and two years. Yet still, you lost it. So so busy of you to lose that feature, texting someone else. I saw you online for a good 3 hours. How are you busy?

I said I don’t mind if you’re busy because we each have our own lives, but you’re completely ghosting me.

I can’t take a single apology from you anymore it makes me even more angry and frustrated I hate how much you take advantage of me because you know I’ll be the first to say “it’s alright” or “don’t think about it too much, I forgive you” and completely forget about every single breakdown I’ve had because of you.

I hate all of your sorry messages I hate the way I felt so happy each time you apologize even though you never changed, I hate when I begged you to stop calling you a bad boyfriend even though you are not only a bad boyfriend but the worst newest person that entered my life, I hate how much I can’t stop loving you despite all of the pain and hatred I’m getting from you, I hate how much I miss the times you were actually excited to text me, I hate it when I actually believed that you’d love me forever, I hate it when we talked about our future together and how we both prayed to be soulmates, I hate how you’re always the first thing that comes to mind when I wake up, do something, cry, laugh, lay down, work, and every single other thing I do in my life. I hate how much I love you more than you love me and I hate even more how much I’m aware of it. I hate the night you killed me inside and still found a way to make me happy in the end with your tricks. I hate how happy you look in real life when I see you with your friends knowing I have one friend and always have to plan ahead if she’s not here, how I have problems with everyone and even that current friend I’m not happy around, compared to you and your amazing friend group where everyone loves you and you love them.

I hate how you still manage to have a smile on your face even when we’re not texting. I don’t understand how much I hate you right now but it’s not hate as in how much I hate my old friends, it’s a hate of sadness and of “how could you do this to me” hate. I hate you so much I can’t get rid of you. I love you too much and that’s why I hate you. I hope to one day look back at my 8th grade and hopefully say that all this pain was all worth it in the end because I’ve ruined my childhood so much 7-8th grade because of you.

Tomorrow January 12 2024 will be the day me and you met last year. We’ve known each other for a year. Why does it feel like I’ve known you my whole life and I’ve felt miserable since birth? I can't do this anymore.

I wish I could be as happy as you when you’re with your friends, I wish I could be as careless as you, I wish I could go months without texting their partner just like you, I wish I didn’t need to worry if someone’s going to leave me or not, I wish I could have peace and calmness in my life, I wish I had friends I actually enjoyed, I wish I didn’t need to feel so lonely all the time, I wish I didn’t have to look down whenever I see you in the hallways so that I don’t embarrass myself, I wish I wasn’t always so angry, I wish I didn’t care so much about everything, I wish I wasn’t sensitive, I wish I was crying right now, I wish I could leave and forget everyone I met last and this year including you, I wish I didn’t start talking to you, I wish I was your first and only option, I wish I didn’t think of you everytime a song came up, I wish I didn’t think of you when I see something that I know you like, I wish I could find an end to all the things that come up to mind that don’t stop flowing when I’m writting these, I wish I didn’t waste all that money on you, I wish that Snapstreak I paid back for because you lost it, wasn’t lost again because you just didn’t feel like doing it anymore, I wish I didn’t cry to sad songs because they remind me of you, I wish I didn’t see myself in every mentally unstable situation, I wish I could go to sleep peacefully, I wish you were there when I needed you most, I wish you felt the way I felt, I wish you experienced the stuff I went through, I wish you could understand how I feel, I wish you would listen to me for once, I wish you’d understand the things I feel, I wish you knew how much I’m hurting, I wish I could tell someone about all my problems without feeling guilty afterwards, I wish I could shut my mouth up and stop talking so much especially when nobody enjoys it, I wish you’d snap-text me the way we used to, I wish you’d randomly tell me how much you love me like before, i wish you would beg me for forgiveness when you’d forget to reply for like 5 mins unlike how you leave me on delivered on purpose for 2 days now, I wish you felt grateful for me still being here, I wish I could move places and forget everything, I wish my sins weren’t all on my back even though I’m trying to move on, i wish I could move on from you, I wish I could forget about you the way you so easily forgot about me, I wish I could go to sleep without crying, I wish I could stop listening to my thoughts, I wish everyone would like me like you, I wish you’d understand everything and everyone I lost because I was with you, I wish you’d see how much people hate me because I’m with you and they were jealous, I wish you realize that i didn't care about how I have no friends because I knew I’d be able to talk to u when I get back home, that’s why I’m hurting so much now.

I wish you could ignore the girls that try to hit you up, just like how I do with the boys that simply want to be my friend, I wish you understood how stupidly I miss you, I wish you could treat me how I wish a man could treat me, I wish you’d never leave to France, I wish you never find a new person in France, I wish you’d understand how I can’t live without you anymore and it’s all your fault, I wish you’d see and understand that I feel so worried because I don’t want to lose you, I wish you’d comprehend that I wouldn’t get jealous for no reason and that I was overprotective but rather that you’re my first love and I’m scared of losing you, I wish you’d understand how much I try to talk to you and be around you, I wish you know and see how I finish all my work early or do it later just to try and be able to talk to you as much as I can, I wish you’d know how I’m writing all of this right now instead of revising for my test tomorrow. I wish I wouldn’t feel so tired after crying about you for just a few minutes, I wish my eyes weren’t always heavy because of you and crying because of you, I wish I could stop loving you forever.

Happy birthday Jake! Whenever I write ur name it always pops up as “JAKEEE” and it might sound stupid but I smile everytime I see it. I’m writing this at 11:19pm, on a day where you’re ghosting me, again for the second time. I don’t know what’s the reason this time, knowing you couldn’t keep your promise of not doing it again that you said not even a week ago.

I hope you’re aware I’m not stupid, I see when you’re online, I know you’ve left me on delivery for two days on purpose. When I said I don’t know about your reason “this time”, I in fact don’t know a lot of things that you do. When you’re in trouble I know you go on your phone for a couple minutes, you just decide to not even check up on me with that time. It sounds pathetic and unimportant but in my point of view it’s the most gut wrenching thing to know because I would, without a doubt, pick you out of everyone to talk to if I was going to die and had one last chance to talk to someone.

I’m typing all of this and I’m not even sure if we’ll make it till your birthday but, I’ve decided to completely forget about you when it hits 2024 if you still kept ghosting me because I wanna turn into a new person and throw away my past and all my old mistakes behind me that have been affecting my present. I try so hard to give myself excuses about you not texting, maybe you’re doing something with your parents like you said you were doing, maybe it was a surprise trip! But then I think more and realize that if you wanted to text me and say why you couldn’t text, you would’ve and if you couldn’t, you would’ve tried.

I hate how much I love you and I hate how much I’m aware that you don’t love me the same amount. My December is the absolute definition of “Hell”. I decided to wait for winter break to talk to you all about it and make myself better. What a fool I was for waiting and thinking you’d still text me the same. I hate how we text now, I don’t care about anything I just wanna feel special texting you the way we used to.

When I used to always tell you how tired I am based on how tired you are(like when you weren't tired and I was, I’d lie and say I wasn’t either, don’t know if you know what I’m talking about) I’d say it because I know myself, I know how if you were sad I’d be sad, if you’re happy I’m happy, when you’re not around I’m sad and when you’re around I’m happy.

You don’t understand the times I Thanked god each time you texted me back, even when it turned into an argument. I rather argue with you instead of no contact. That's how much I enjoy texting you. No matter how much I’ve cried and felt miserable being with you at times, I can’t seem to let you go. No matter how many boys that have liked me and I’ve never told you about, I decided to ignore and move on with my life. No matter how handsome they were, I myself don't understand why I see something in you that I don’t see with anyone else. Not being able to let you go is what kills me and I physically cannot live without you.

I can’t live a few hours without you, especially when I don't know the reason why you’re gone. When you told me you leave the people you don’t like texting on delivery, you told me that February 2023, a few days before the Valentine’s dance. If I told my February 2023 self that I’d be one of those people you keep on delivering, I’d laugh and start talking about how you’re such an amazing person.

And what’s worse is, I still laugh at myself and talk the best about you, even when I know deep down all the things I would rather swallow glass than go through again when I was with you.

I remember all our memories like it was yesterday, Jan 12, the first conversation when I added you on discord and you asked me “who is this” and i replied with “why didn’t you join me in nana simulator”. That day when going in the bus I told ____ “hey that Jake guy is kinda cute” but didn’t think it would get this far.

The time you made that stupid lie about not hugging me because mister ____ was there and u didn’t want ur parents to know.. I knew it was a lie, and I wasn’t upset that you didn’t hug me, I was uncomfortable as well at that moment, I was upset because someone hit me.

The night you got with g/n that was the same night you got with me. Every single conversation we had I remember it, even the stupid moment when you said you only liked g/n 40%. You say a lot of stupid things that turn out funny, that’s why I try to make myself feel better thinking you wouldn’t do anything to hurt me, but I forget that you’re not a child and you know everything you do.

I seriously wish I was lying when I say I never cried this much in my life except when I met you, even now. Right now, you’re even active on Instagram and of course I’m still on delivery. I’ve never felt so pathetic and embarrassed in my life, just looking at that “delivered 2D” thing on ur name. How I watched your name go from “jake” to “Jake❤️” to “jaeyun” to “j” to your original name on snap that you have on default. “⚽️”.

I love you so much that even my mother loves you. Whenever you weren’t texting me (practically the entire December), my mother would ask me about you a lot, I knew she loved you so much and I didn’t want you to have a bad look to my mother so I’d lie to her for you and tell her that you just texted me that you couldn’t text and whenever she’d ask me again, I’d tell her that you were saying the truth and u haven’t went online ever since, even though I knew that you were online half of the time.

I’ve tried seeing you all the time at school just to look at you and act if we are still texting, even if it meant crying a bit in class while thinking about you because I was left without explanation and you always look so happy, despite my absence in your life.

I keep lying to myself and saying that you mean the words you say to me but I know you don’t try to see me in every person you come across the same way I do, you don’t think of me the second you wake up at night the way I do, you would never look for me In a room full of girls.

I wake up from dreams in the middle of the night and even if it was a nightmare my first thought would be you, even if most likely the nightmare would have something to do with you. When my phone is next to me and I wake up, the first thing I do is put my phone down and in my head I say “please say you texted” knowing that each time it’s never you. I go back to sleep and wait for a message knowing I’d never wake up again if it were the case. I say I wish you could communicate more so I could understand how much you love me but, do you not love me as much because you lack communication or do you lack communication because you don’t love me as much.?

I don’t really know how this happy birthday thing turned into a whole story about my love life with you and how miserable I’ve been ever since school started again. It’s 2:01am now and I just can’t seem to fall asleep when you’re on my mind. My head hurts thinking so much about you, my head goes dizzy and my eyes start to pump as if they have their own heartbeat, disgusting..

I love you so much I wish I could forget about you for my own well being.

7 snaps in the morning, none of them are you. So many boys on my phone yet you're still the only one I wish would text me. My head knows ur bad for me but my heart doesn’t wanna leave you, I’m scared of losing every opportunity of being able to be with you, but I guess I’m just wasting that time with my own well being.

3 days doesn't sound like a lot but when you’re always online and ignoring me on purpose, it sure is a long time. I wish I could leave you on delivery for that long. I tried to ignore you a few times but I couldn’t last more than 4 minutes. It hurts how much we are different in this relationship and how much love is we feel is unequal

I tried as much as I could to keep you as my number one best friend on snap. I told my entire best friend list that I couldn’t talk so that nobody would go up, and it still managed to get ruined. Lina spent her days spamming me and making me reply to stories she posts so that she could take the number one best friend list on my list, and it worked. I doubt I was still yours anyway.

It’s funny because it’s news years and 2 years ago, this was the day i met the online friend who left me.

The one I was attached with for 2 years and ruined my entire mental health throughout 6 and 7th grade. The one that YOU replaced. The one I talked about for hours with you on TikTok, the one I told you I would tell everything and ever since he left, you were the new person I started acting as if it was him.

That guy, that nasty guy I was best friends with, blocked me for fun and ghosted me just to see me suffer without him, and you’re just repeating all of it.

I know you’re never going to message me, yet I realize I keep checking my lock screen every 5 minutes, your Instagram status, your reposts, your snap score, everything. I keep myself on not disturb but keep checking to hope that maybe, just maybe, you would’ve decided to check my messages and reply.

If I knew that night was gonna be the last time we were gonna talk to each other, I would’ve listened to my gut and begged you to stay. I’ve repeated many things, this entire “paragraph”(more like a book lol.) is in scrabbles because I don’t know how to explain myself, I write so much each time and just keep feeling the same, no happiness.

I know I said if you don’t text before it hits 2024, I’d forget you and erase you from my life because I’m trying to change, but the truth is, I’m sure that even if you text me after, I’d reply the second I see your name. Although I might be still a little too confident thinking you’d text at all. I don’t want to leave you, even when I know it’s better for me. I want to text you “I wanna break up” so you could make some sense when you’re half swiping my message and quickly reply, but I’m scared that you wouldn’t question it and instead just say okay and leave for good.

I hate always being the one that gets attached in relationships, especially when the other isn’t.

I hate how when you came back after ghosting me for 2 weeks before ghosting me again this time, you were acting as if you were embarrassed and very guilty about what you did, you made me feel bad for you. While I was the one suffering and crying every chance I got, I was the one comforting you. “You don’t need to say sorry, I knew you wouldn’t do this without a reason, I know you wouldn’t mean it.

Even before you came back and said sorry, I had forgiven you. I just want you to focus on yourself but please, communicate with me next time, I’ll understand you.” Those were the words I told you. Why can’t anyone comfort me the same way I comfort people? Why were those the words I wanted to hear? Why are you, the one who makes me smile and who makes me wanna die as well, why are you the only reason I wanna keep living? Why do I see my life only as Important because I know if I died I wouldn’t be able to text you anymore?

I see you use Snapchat by your snap score going up, gosh it feels so pathetic to know I’m still on delivered. Stop doing this to me please I beg you it hurts too much I can’t handle any of it anymore. My eyes are constantly stinging and it hurts so much, I don’t deserve this, all I ever wanted was for you to be happy, with me, not at the look of me going crazy over you not texting me. I’ve been crying for hours and usually I’d run out of tears to cry, why is it that I keep gaining more this time?

Oh please, come back to me, I bear seeing anyone else with you. Our stupid conversations about getting married and lasting forever with eachother, why have you forgotten all of it?

I would’ve never thought i'd feel this way, i thought I loved my life and the only stress I had was school, why am I on winter break and going absolutely insane in the bathroom and in my room over a person like you.

I would’ve never thought id ever wanna die, why do I feel like it’s my only option to peace right now? Suicidal? No way! But I seriously can’t escape from the thought of you, I need you out of my life, but that would be worse, I just wish I never met you, that’s also a lie. I wish you never changed, I miss the times you would care about how I felt.

This month, December, is my worst year. I needed you most at this time, why did you make it harder for me, purposely? Remember when you got mad at me for playing with ___? Haha I was so sad you were ignoring me again and you admitted you didn’t wanna talk, I loved how overprotective you were acting, but why were you jealous about him when he treats me better than you? Why do I love you more than someone who treats me so much better?.

Wow, when I finished writing that, you checked my message. Dec 31 7:14. Opened. Let me guess, you’re gonna start apologizing “MY BAD MY MAD IM SO SORRY I GOT IN TROUBLE.”

And would you look at that, I wrote in my notes app:

Yup, just as a I thought, Jake: MB MY PARENTS TOOK MY PHONE. I sent this to him, all he had to say was he needed time alone and said “see u” when I said “byeee” what the hell. If I killed myself it wouldn’t be enough for this man..??? He doesn’t text me properly for almost a month and he needs TIME ALONE??? Ugh! Happy new years! I told him happy new years on 12 exactly and all he said was “thanks u to” and I said I was gonna become nicer and he said “cool” so I’m going to be straight up with him and ask if we are breaking up. I don’t wanna wait anymore t’il HE'S READY. All he said was no. Wth — His last words were; I love you so much, I'm sorry, I'll message you when i get the chance.

It’s safe to say, I really was going insane. He never texted me again in 8th grade after that—until, the summer before 9th grade. I remember how he asked if we could talk when I have time, he was in France by now by the way. I told him that I was surprised that I’m hearing him again, and said sure. All he had to say was, “I’m sorry for everything I did, I’m sorry for ghosting you and all, I was really going through it” I beg your pardon?

That’s all he wanted to talk about? Quickly, I respond with:

- you: No, Jake. I want to know what happend , why did you do that?

- Jake: I promise you, It was personal problems y/n

He was so stubborn, I know it wasn’t the reason, we would go through things but we’d go through them together—not the way he did it. But, i always saw the good in him, even in that moment, i wasn’t angry at him. When I was with him, he was amazing—so I always wanted to keep that image of him and not swifch up so quickly just because he ghosted me for practically a year now. But still, i had to do what I had to do so—I asked him the big question:

- You: you know, we never properly broke up, so, what is it? Do u still like me? You haven’t talked to me in forever, you’re supposed to answer this.

- Jake: you first

Not this again.

- you: Jake no. You’re the one who left so you’re the one who answers it.

- Jake: no no just please you first

- You: Jake. What do you want from me? opened.

There he goes again, that was for real the last message. I never heard from him again-

“next stop, _____ university” —

There’s the train—perfect timing.

Today’s a weird day—maybe because it’s snowing, maybe because its the month he first started acting weird. Usually, you think of him before bed, not during the entire morning… You miss him, it’s been a while—You still wonder where he is now.

Sometimes, you wonder if you should drop out of university and become a famous model—maybe then he could recognise you and reach out.

You can barely remember his voice, you lost all my old videos from before you even started texting—those were the times you actually heard him speak, the rest was small talk and then completely no contact. Even when you guys were dating, you never spoke in real life—too scared and nervous.

You're finaly off the train—heading to class now, exams are coming up. You never got to experience it with Jake since he left to go to high-school in France, did I mention that already? You say to yourself. Actually, he had never removed his name from your school so when you had attendance on the first day of nineth grade, he was called in every single one of your classes. What a coincidence, you had never gotten in the same class for two years but then could’ve got all your first semester classes with him if he hadn’t left—what a way to play with your reason to live.

University isn’t like highschool anymore—it’s quieter, people are more focused on themselves than things that people have to say about eachother. You have a small group of friends that you met In highschool, you're glad you're still in touch despite how many years it’s been.

9:09am—huh??? Your class starts in a minute, shoot!

You dont know why you rushed to get to class so quickly… it’s too boring, You're bout to fall asleep. As you were about to lay your head on the desk and doze off—you heard your professor mutter something a little interesting for once.

“Okay students, this doesn’t have to do with our major but the board entered my name to do a small project out of context. Today, and for the following month, there will be 15 people from this class and the class that starts in 2 hours who will travel abroad—more specifically to France-“

That’s all you needed to hear—you didn’t care about the rest, you heard France and knew that you were going to be participating in this activity. It’ll be fun, you say, i'll get to experience how Jake lived in France, you say. You say it all, with no intentions of actually meeting Jake. You just wanted to experience what he experienced, maybe it'd make you feel a little closer to him. Like always, you made everything in your life, about him. It’s like he was famous in your mind.

You needed a break from your current place anyway, everything was all over the place, you felt as if you’ve been living the same days over and over again. Maybe this was an opportunity to change things a bit—get you out of your comfort zone.

You signed up so quickly to the program my teacher talked about a few days ago. You already found a roommate to stay with for the time you'll be staying there.

The guy you arranged to live with was a little bit younger than you, but you didn’t mind—you just needed a place to stay for a bit. You soon learned that he goes to the same university that you’ll be studying in, which is nice—you’ll have someone to help you around everything.

You’re counting the days until you leave—you called with the roommate and found out a few extra things about him. His name was ni-ki, he was also a foreigner except he’s permanently staying there. He’s in the same major as you and as you exchanged schedules, you saw that you guys had 2/4 classes together—that’s nice, already got a buddy to be with for half of your classes!

You're now in France, heading to your apartment—ready to meet Ni-ki. Right before you can manage to knock, he opens the door—as if he was waiting for you by the door. "Hey," he speaks, his voice low and deep. He was tall and slim—it reminded you of Jake. You don't know how he looks like anymore, you haven't in a while. The last time you saw him, he was tall, above all the boys in your grade, you don't know anything about him anymore actually.

Before you could continue being lost in thought, Ni-ki speaks up once again. "How about you go get some rest, you look tired. You can tell me about your trip in the morning. Sounds good?" You nod, you were exhausted, the trip was long and you could barely close your eyes in the plane.

'Oh and, y/n, by the way, i'll invite some friends over for a bit, if that's alright with you?' 'yeah that's fine don't worry, I bet you i'll be so deep in sleep that I wouldn't even wake up if you guys bomb the place.' What a lie. You couldn't fall asleep at all.

right as you thought you were going to fall asleep, you heard the door burst open, the people Ni-ki invited finally arrived. You could hear like—five people? Oh wait—no—a sixth one—who.. Sounded a lot like—Jake.

You couldn't remember his voice but when you heard something like him—you just knew. What a great discovery, even if you were going to finally get some sleep—you definitely aren't now. You sat in the bed you were assigned to sleep in, listening to the boys downstairs chatting—the guy who sounded like Jake wasn't really talkative, maybe its not him—actually, you're sure its not him—you're just eavesdropping so that you could pretending that you're listening to Jake's voice.

In the morning, Ni-ki had to wake you up for your class because you were still used to your old timezone. 'y/n... we have class in like 30 minutes...' 'Five more minutes... Get off of me, let me sleep!' 'I'll rip up all your clothes if you don't get up.' 'What? What! Okay, okay I'm up!'

You both ran to class, your apartment wasn't on campus but it was still close. You were introduced to the first two classes with Ni-ki by your side, you followed him everywhere for those first two periods—but now, you two next are alone—and you have no idea where to go.

Luckily, you spotted one of your teachers from your morning classes, they had to go fill out some papers and correct tests so they couldn't give you a tour of the school—but guided you to Ni-ki's class so that he could be excused out of his class and help you.

You walked into his class behind your teacher, not bothering to look at anyone to try and find him—too scared you'll make awkward eye contact with anyone who isn't him.

"I'm sorry for interrupting your lesson, Chanelle, but could we please steal your student Nishimura Riki for a period? We have a new foreign student who knows him and needs a tour of campus." Your teacher said to the one who was currently teaching Ni-ki's class. "Oh why of course, and don't apologise, i needed this few second break..." She responded. "Nishimura, get down here"

As she called him over, you follower her eyes—trying to spot Ni-ki. Then, you found him, laying back on a chair with his feet on the table, surrounded by 6 boys—probably the ones from yesterday.

'Hey ni-ki, whos that girl next to the teacher? You know her?' The purple haired boy asked. Just as you were going to smile and wave at him, your eyes spotted one of the boys who stood out a bit brighter than the rest—due to his immersive stare at you. Jake. There he was. Yes you haven't seen him in a while, but those eyes never change. it really was him—right infront of you. It was Jake.

You didn't utter a single word—turning quickly and just waiting for ni-ki to get down. You always imagined what you'd do when you saw him again—you just didn't expect it ever to be like this.

In the afternoon, after both you and ni-ki got back to your apartment. You built up the courage to ask him, 'Hey, ni-ki, who were those boys you were with when I came into your class searching for you?' 'Oh them, those are my best friends. Heeseung, the purple haired one you heard, Jay, Sunghoon, Sunoo, Jungwon and Jake. We've been friends ever since i got here, but they've been childhood friends since they were little—except Jake, he came during highschool, but that's still a while ago! Y/n? Are you listening-' 'Yes! Yes! I am indeed!' 'Oh okay, well yeah. Actually, they're coming over again—i'll properly introduce you to them then!'

Excuse you? Coming over? Again? How many times do these boys come over? They just visited yesterday... "Again?" you spoke, voice a little lower than you hoped it'd be. "Yeah, they come over all the time, you'll love them, trust me!" He said, love filled in his eyes as he spoke about his friends—completely unaware of what you were currently thinking.

Minutes passed and suddenly, the doorbell rang. You instinctively froze, Ni-ki jogged to go get the door, leaving you in the living room alone, awkwardly waiting. "Guys, this is the girl from earlier, this is y/n, shes my roommate" One by one, they entered the room, you got up and kindly greeted all five of them—until it was turn for the sixth one who took a little longer to remove his coat after hearing ni-ki's words.

When it was Jake's turn, your heart sank, you looked at him from close up—he was different. His face had matured, his hair had thickened, He body looked a lot fuller and grown up than you last remember. A lot changed—but it was still so easy to tell it was him. Perfect nose, flawless face, the same eyes you fell in love with.

"Y/n?" Jake spoke, in a questioning tone, way lower than how he used to speak. You were surprised that he even said something, if you two were in 8th grade, he wouldn't even be able to look your way, head down as he walks past you to make it seem like he didn't see you—while you would stare at the lockers, the opposite direction of him. "Long time no see" was all you said, though your mind was saying alot more.

"You two know each other?" Jungwon asked as you both nodded. "What a small world!" Sunoo added.

The rest of the night was awkward, both you and Jake sneaking glances of each other, trying to admire everything that changed. We haven't seen each other in 10 years, It's normal. For a split second, you both had eye contact—his eyebrows lower than usual, his eyes in a weird shape, like if it was an apology.

He used to be so active, so energetic—but tonight, he was even quieter than when I heard him yesterday from upstairs.

Sunghoon and Heeseung requested to watch a movie. You tried distracting yourself by helping Jay pick out snacks from the pantry, but his gaze was burning you, you could feel it no matter what you do. All of a sudden, ni-ki requested Jake to go grab some drinks. As he walked past you to the fridge he whispered, "Y/n, can we talk?"

It was starting to get late, each member leaving, keeping you and Jake alone. You didn't want to talk in the apartment with ni-ki so you both requested going outside the apartment, take a little walk as you talk.

It reminded you of when you went on that field trip, walking downtown with lights everywhere, as if you were in a movie, as if the world was only you and him, nothing else mattered. After minutes of silence, he broke it, Jake finally spoke.

- I didnt expect to you again. He said

- I didnt either.

- I wanted to apologise for everything, I know i said that the last time we spoke, but i really mean it this time. I know that whatever the reason was, I should've never acted that way.

- But Jake, how many times have we been through this before? Its been 10 years and yet you still say the same thing. I don't even know why I'm still here, listening to you say all of this, even after all the time that passed.

- I know I was always wrong, i know. My parents forced me okay? They didn't think I'd be able to focus on my education if I kept talking to you. My graders were dropping and they thought it was because of you when really it was because i was fooling around with my friends. I know you asked me if it was because of my parents and I said no but I was just so scared I didn't know what to do, I didn't want to disrespect my parents either and tell you that they were telling me to leave you.

As you were trying to find the words to respond to him, he continued.

- I know i was a jerk, and i dont expect you to forgive me so easily especially that im saying all of this so late, I didnt know if you would want to ever see my face again anyway. I needed to say this all because i cant keep it in anymore.

At this point, he’s sobbing, unable to even walk anymore—he just sat there, on the side of the road. His hands covering his face and trying to wipe his tears as fast as he face—now, avoiding your gaze at all times.

You’ve never seen him like this, he never cried, never spoke about his feelings, he never thought he should because he wanted to look strong all the time. “okay Jake, I forgive you, I forgave you a long time ago, just please, get up Jake. Let’s go to your place, I can’t leave you like this, please.” You pleaded, feeling sorry for him. You knew he had a kind heart deep down despite everything, your heart ached at the scene in front of you.

You got to his place, helped him wash his face, his face flushed, embarrassed that he did all that after seeing you just once aft all those years. Everything was weird, despite the entire scene, everything was still unspoken, leaving plenty of things to discuss about.

As you sat him down on his couch, he said, "Y/n. I promise you for real this time, i'll tell you everything, I'll explain everything right now, I want to fix things even if it takes another 10 years to cure it all."

"Okay." you said, everything felt like the day you two confessed, explaining the unexplained, answering the questions you both were wondering about each other's actions back there.

Maybe it was going to take a while to get everything adjusted again, but you didn't mind, its not like you waited 10 years already, you know how to wait. None of that mattered right now, you were just relieved that finally—you have answers.

Maybe, it was worth it—having you famous in my mind.

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adoregojo · 11 months ago

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secret admirer.

hihihihihihihihi, i cannot believe i actually slept for two days in a row? wth? and also that i never did this kind of posts? im such a lazy bum mb yall, I promise I'll write a real fic soon. summary: bllk characters as your secret admirers: isagi, bachira, chigiri, reo. how they fell, what do they do, how did they confess.

isagi.y

him. just him.

you once held his shirt collar to stop him from planting flatly on the floor.

and when you walked away, you walked with his heart in your palms.

yea, just like that

but honestly, isagi himself didn't knew he was such a big sap inside

and the moment he realised you two shared a few classes was the second he almost kneeled and thanked the sky itself for this.

an absolute swoon from looking at your side profile.

he once was long gone within the abyss of daydreaming about you, he genuinely just couldn't look away.

then got called out by the teacher for being too distracted.

definitely prayed that you didn't see that.

writes your name unintentionally in his notebook.

gets so embarrassed about it later and rips the paper.

still dose it again the next day and almost ripped the whole book apart form cringing at himself.

he once was musing over you too much to the point that your name slipped out unwittingly on the dinner table.

his parents couldn't stop teasing him about it, wondering when they would see you walking down their house door.

leaves love notes in your locker almost everyday.

it's something short and simple like: "you look pretty today."

then when he goes home he'll realize how dumb that was because you literally look the prettiest everyday.

dumb, dumby.

takes time to make the first move though.

he just feels like you're way, farther away from his reach.

it's okay, he still considers himself lucky to be one of those who got admire you.

he just hoped you saw him behind all of them, even if it was a glance.

chigiri.h

omgg pretty boyyy

despite chigiri being a confident and self-reliant, the trigger words of his old injury was like a pulling a pin of a grenade to his still-raw sorrowness. something that'll always haunt him.

and what dose he dare to say when they were nothing but truthful? like a salt to his wounds, he tends to just take it and suck it up, or at least try to ignore it for his sake.

but everything flipped when you stood up for him.

from that moment on. chigiri knew that he was far a goner.

out of everyone here he's definitely the most romantic one.

reads all your favourite books and analysis it.

probably named a cat after you.

like isagi he writes love letters for you.

just a little too poetic..

it it's short then it's something like: "loving you is like breathing." or "i hope your days are filled with the same joy you give me with your existence only."

but mostly is: "my definition of love, i see the true meaning of living behind your hue of life. you shall lighten my soul with your existence alone, i was born to see you shin each day, witnessing you is a blessing from heaven itself. the day that i stop seeing you as the owner of the stars is the day my body shall vanish, yet my soul will know it way back to you. from your only and one your admirer."

what a lovesick clown.

he might be a smooth talker on the outside, but trust me the butterflies of sentimental keeps on swirling in his stomach on the sight of you.

told his mother and sister about you.

it was his biggest regrets.

because the next day his sister shouted your name in a demand for you to spend the night for the 'meeting of the future in law'.

he had to physically drag her back to the car, freaking embarrassing.

couldn't meet your eyes for a while after that.

wants to hold your hand.

like, really badly.

it's just that feeling your skin against his cold, pristine hands must've feel like the loveliest, cosiest thing.

the thoughts alone are making him go crazy.

he confessed first, just couldn't help himself.

he just hoped if you would go to the end of the world alongside with him.

bachira.m

the sunshine boy himself.

the definition of fell first AND fell harder.

it all started when the class was ordered to work as duo for a project, something he always despised.

you may say that because bachira was definitely not having the word 'smart' in his book, you'd be right actually.

but mainly since no one really wanted to group up with him.

it was embarrassing, to just sit there and wait to be picked was putting him under the lights that pointed him out as the most pitiful creature in the room.

then you pocked him on the shoulder, and asked him if he wanted to be your partner.

and when he didn't see the sarcasm reeking from you, he knew he tripped hard, and couldn't find it anywhere in his feet to back him up.

it was strange, bachira never had a company, let alone a crush.

but the signs were there, and were painfully vulnerable.

painted you in art class multiple times; you with a smile, you reading a book, you sniffing a sunflower.

maybe also you and him... holding hands or hugging...

stares at your face a way, way too long.

he tells himself it's to crave your features better and detailed.

even he doesn't believe that however.

he draws your eyes a lot.

his second favourite colour is your eyes hue.

he was never the best at writing romantic poems, and his hand writing is just........

so he insisted gets you a gift!

which is a rock.

yes you heard me, rock.

he would even paint a little face with a smile on it and leave it on your desk by the end of the day.

almost went bald from joy when you had it hanging as a small march on your bag.

and when you had a bad day, that goes unnoticed by him.

so imagine your surprise when you would find two pairs of rocks, one kissing the other who had a sad expression on it face.

that somehow that foster a blissful smile on your face. like that little action extinct any remains of the past negative you carried.

and bachira was more than happy to be the reason for your happiness.

definitely rambles about you to his mom.

and his monster.

he once ha a dream about you two smooching.

cried when he woke up because he wanted it to be real more than anything.

you two confessed first, at the same time.

and boy was he dancing on cloud nine at it.

he almost smooch you that moment and then.

reo.m

it's mister perfect everyone, cheer.

you fell first, he fell harder.

no, literally. you fell. tripped flat on the floor.

and somehow, that made the reo mikage heart move.

?????????

love at first (fall??) sight.

he definitely leaves a trail of gifts for you everywhere.

your chair, desk, locker, bag.

he switches between chocolate and flowers to letters and perfumes, necklaces, etc..

you say how he picked them?

easy, see something that reminds him of you, he buys.

and it's pretty foolish since he sees you in almost everything.

reo is convinced that you're within everything that shins beautifully.

he actually paid the teachers to let him be in the same classroom as you.

paid even more to get a seat next to you.

rip to whoever was sitting next to you.

he once heard that a guy was bothering you.

the next day the guy was the talking of school because he suddenly moved out of town due to his dad losing his job.

hm, must be karma then.

has a shrine of you.

but you didn't hear that from me.

talks about you none stop to nagi and ba-ya.

genuinely sobbed when he imagined you with someone else.

has a flight under your name.

made a makeshift doll of you so he can practice his confessions on.

had a mental breakdown of the idea of you rejecting him.

reo can the most horrible, miserable day to a human kind to live.

then he sees you smiling

BOOM

he's all happy and smiling again, also a little giddy.

you once greeted him good morning, the next day he was planing what ring would suit you the most.

had two planes to write on the sky: 'will you go out with me?' and your name next to it in a shade of a heart.

now, you definitely cannot reject that. (Please don't)

have a nice day everyone.

#blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock #isagi x reader #bachira x reader #reo x reader #chigiri hyoma x reader #chigiri x reader #yoichi isagi x reader #bachira meguru x reader #reo mikage x reader

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heavyhitterheaux · 2 months ago

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Hello

See Me Through You Series

You had me at hello

Synopsis: The day that you met the love of your life and didn't realize it until almost a year later

Series Masterlist

Stepping onto the sidewalk as you had just left the building where your journalism class had just ended, your phone suddenly vibrated in your back pocket. It took you a minute to grab it, seeing as both of your hands were occupied at the moment. Doing a balancing act with your purse, backpack, keys and your binder that contained your notes, but was too big to fit in your backpack, you finally had a free hand.

Pulling it out of your back pocket, you saw it was your younger twin brother by three minutes Ja'Marr calling on facetime and took no hesitation to answer it. This was his fifth call to you today and knew that about four more would come your way and the worst part about it was that it wasn't even noon.

Not that you were upset about it. If your little brother called and needed you, he always became the priority and everything would be dropped at that very moment.

“What does your ugly ass want?” You asked him as his face came into view. He promptly rolled his eyes and sucked his teeth before saying anything. You could tell that he was in the gym and was probably waiting on you to get there since you had promised to work out with him.

“If I'm ugly, so are you because we're twins, stupid!”

“No, that's what mom and dad tell you but they actually found you in a dumpster and felt sorry for you and took you in.” You told him as you laughed and started to make your way back to your car to head to your apartment that was off campus.

It was only a few miles down the road which you were thankful for and the good part is that you could also drive home to see your parents on the weekends if you wanted to.

You were relieved when Ja'Marr decided to attend LSU with you because the two of you had never been apart in your entire lives. Deep down you knew that you would have eventually adjusted to him not being at the same college as you, but also glad that you didn't have to go that route.

“Y/N!”

“Just kidding! What do you need assistance with, little one?”

“Little one? I'm 6’1 and you are BARELY 5 feet on a good day. Try again.”

You were suddenly taken aback as you saw someone come into the frame behind him and did a double take once you recognized who it was.

Growing up in a sports filled household, college football as well as the NFL was not foreign to you. You watched both of them and knew players as well as their stats forwards and backwards. So to your surprise, you were actually seeing him in real time. You heard of the transfer happening, but it was different seeing him right in front of you.

So the rumors were true, he was really here.

Joe Burrow

Who used to play for Ohio State apparently was now playing for LSU.

“Ja'Marr, I will hang up. State your business or move on.”

“I thought you were supposed to meet me at the gym to work out AND bring my headphones that I know for a fact you stole.”

“YOU CAN'T PROVE IT!”

“Hmm, funny. I recall you asking me to use them last week and I haven't seen them since.”

“I threw them away.”

“WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DEMAND ON STRESSING ME OUT? And I have someone here I want you to meet.”

“Who?”

“Will you just hurry up and get here and stop arguing with me!? I can pick your ass up and throw you across the room.”

“Hmm, sounds like a threat. I'm calling mommy. Bye.”

“Uh hold on, WAIT! DON'T CALL HER!”

Click.

Once back in your apartment, you quickly changed into your pink and black Fabletics workout set with your matching HOKAS and went on the search not only for Ja'Marr's headphones, but also yours. Since he let you borrow his, you didn’t bother trying to find yours even though you know you should have.

The both of you worked out with each other several times a week and it was important seeing as he played football and you were on the gymnastics team with your best friend, Erin.

Putting your curly hair into a high bun since you didn’t have time to straighten it this morning, you grabbed your wallet, water bottle, and keys before making your way back down to your car and heading to the gym.

Walking inside, you spotted him along with Joe in the corner next to the weight rack and promptly came up behind him and attempted to pick him up as you saw Joe's face giving a small smirk because of the gesture. You admit that you didn't realize how tall Joe actually was and you noticed that he was taller than Ja'Marr when they stood next to one another.

“HEY! Oh, it's just you. Joe, my big little sister by three minutes and she will never let you forget it, Y/N and Y/N this is Joe. And you are never going to be able to pick me up.” He told you while patting the top of your head as you were now trying to pick up his left leg.

“Just you watch. It's going to happen one day when you least expect it. Anyway, Hi Joe, and Ja'Marr you should know better. I already know who you are.” You told him and he looked a little confused before greeting you.

“Hey, you do gymnastics right? I saw you compete over the summer.”

You smiled before nodding, taken aback that he knew who you were also. Not a lot of attention was put on gymnastics unless it was during the Olympics. Your goal was to go to Tokyo in 2020.

“Didn't take you for a gymnastics type of guy.” You replied while attempting to fix your hair that had now fallen out of the bun you put it in. You blamed it on not being tight enough the first time.

“It's entertaining to watch.”

“Hmm, because of the outfits?” You asked as you were trying to feel him out and you could've swore you heard Ja'Marr mutter something under his breath.

“No, I just think it's insane how you can do all those different types of exercises and routines just like it's nothing. You can literally visualize where you're going to land before it happens.”

“It's the same with football when you think about it. You're a quarterback so I can imagine that before you decide where you're going to throw and who you're going to throw to what the end result will be.”

“Something like that.”

“Stop interrogating the man! Sports journalism is her major and she thinks she's smart. So she of course knows all of the players and their stats. I’m convinced she’s going to start memorizing playbooks and try to get on the field with us.” Ja'Marr said as he turned to Joe and you pinched his arm resulting in a yelp as Joe let out a small laugh.

“I'm smarter than your dumbass. That's for sure and are we going to work out or stand here all day? Besides I wasn't interrogating. You can't get to know someone unless you talk to them and ask questions.” You told him as you gave him his headphones.

“I'm ignoring you and what are we working on today?”

“Hmm full body I guess. I already did my legs, back, shoulders and arms this week.” You answered as you shrugged and put in your headphones. Flipping through your phone, you tried to find the perfect playlist in order to get through the workout and hopefully finish strong.

You usually hated working out with Ja’Marr since he would always want to add on something extra at the end of it when you were ready to go home and crawl into the bed.

Joe and Ja’Marr quickly agreed and it was decided that the three of you would warm up by running on the treadmill for three miles before going back to the weight rack.

On your second mile, your music was suddenly cut off by your phone ringing. Looking down you saw that it was Trevor, your boyfriend of one year who happened to play baseball at LSU and that was one of your primary reasons for going there. Also having your brother there was a plus.

Deep down you knew that your brother didn’t like him, but to you he was the best thing since sliced bread and could do no wrong in your eyes. But what you didn’t notice was Ja’Marr glancing over at your phone and seeing it was him and rolling his eyes.

You simply finished out your third mile before going to call him back leaving Ja’Marr there along with Joe who had turned down the speed to a brisk walk as he had done the same.

“I fucking hate her boyfriend.”

“Wait, what? He’s here too?” Joe asked as he was looking around.

“No, I saw that he called her and I’m guessing that she went to go and call him back. I can’t fucking stand him and she could do so much better. But she’s happy and the last thing I want to do is ruin that for her. He honestly treats her like shit from what I’ve seen, but I guess she doesn't see it that way.” He confessed as Joe had his eyes on you as you were standing in the corner. He figured that you were on facetime by the way you were holding it and making gestures with your hands.

“But he makes sure to never do that shit in front of me because I will take his ass down. I’m always going to protect my sister. I honestly wish that she was with someone who respected her and didn’t take her for granted like his ass does. She is honestly the sweetest most generous person despite how much we might bicker and she doesn’t deserve someone who takes her for granted. But you'll eventually be able to see how sweet she is for yourself. She literally lives up under me. When you see me, nine times out of ten she’s not too far behind.”

It was at that moment, you walked back over to them and Ja’Marr could tell that you were visibly upset.

“Pebbles, what’s wrong?” Ja’Marr asked but you simply waved him off.

Ever since you two were about six months old, your aunt on your mother's side started to call the two of you Pebbles and Bam Bam and the nicknames had stuck. It also was no coincidence since your mom used to love watching the Flintstones when she was small just like you and Ja’Marr did.

“Nothing, I’m fine. Let’s hurry up and get this done.” You responded as you felt tears forming in your eyes and you did your best to quickly wipe them away.

“You aren't fine so don't stand up here and lie to me. Did he upset you?”

Joe could now see that he was visibly upset which was in turn making you more upset.

“Don't worry about it, I just want to get this done so I can go back to my apartment and study.”

“If you need me to kick his ass, I stay ready.”

“JA'MARR! NO!”

“And Joe will back me up too. You should see how much he can bench press. No one will know.”

“I… I appreciate both of you very much for offering even though you literally just threw Joe in there without giving him a say in the matter, but I promise I'm good.”

“I'm here for assistance if needed.” Joe said and that put a small smile on your face.

“Yeah about that, show me how much you can bench press.”

“Oh lord, Joe you got her started. Now her competitive ass is going to see if she can beat you. She might be small, but don't let that fool you. She also eats like a grown ass man.”

“Bam Bam, keep talking and I will throw that 60 pound dumbbell at your head.”

The workout was winding down and you wanted to work on your pull ups a little bit more since the upper body was your weakest area. You stood in front of the pull up bar and noticed that Ja'Marr was in the middle of his set, so the only other option was to ask Joe for help to reach the bar since there was no way in the world that you would be able to get up there on your own. But he beat you to it as he walked over to you.

“Need some help?”

“Hmm, definitely yes since there is no way in the world I'll be able to reach it by myself.” You replied as you both laughed.

“I got you. Jump up and I'll lift you the rest of the way.”

Nodding your head, you turned around and felt Joe's light touch on both of your sides. You couldn't quite explain it, but when his hands made contact with your skin, the feeling that it gave you felt unreal. Almost if it was something out of a movie. Shaking it out of your mind, you focused on the task in front of you as you jumped up.

As promised Joe helped you the rest of the way and stepped back once he saw that you were hanging onto the bar.

“Do you mind just standing there to spot me? Pull ups aren't my strongest thing.”

“Yeah, I'll be right here. Go ahead, you think you can do twenty?”

“Hmm, let's find out. I think I can.”

Fifteen of them came with ease and when you started to struggle, you once again felt Joe's hands on your waist and he helped you do the rest of them. You let go of the bar with him then catching you and placing you on your feet.

“Thank you for that.” You told him and you received a cheeky smile in return.

“Any time.”

“By the end of the semester, my plan is to be able to bench press the same weight or more weight than you.” You playfully told him and the smile that he had before became wider.

“I'd love to see that, princess. So let's put some money on it.”

“How much? 50?” You asked not really knowing how much he was willing to put up.

“Nah, you can do better than that.”

“Okay, 500.” You said as you shrugged.

“Damn, I didn't think you would go that high, but okay. Ja'Marr also mentioned to me that since you're the oldest, what you say usually goes between the two of you.”

“He's teaching you well.”

“Hmm, we'll see if that holds up between the two of us.”

“Looks like we just have to see then, won't we Burrow?”

The next day, you found yourself yawning at five in the morning absentmindedly taking small bites of your protein bar as you began to stretch with Erin coming over to sit next to you.

You hated that you had gymnastics practice so early in the day, making all of your classes be in the afternoon or late at night. The campus itself was huge and you didn't always necessarily feel completely safe when you had to walk back to your car late at night.

“So, did you break up with Trevor yet?” She asked as she began to stretch her arms.

“Uh? Good morning to you too, Erin.”

“Good morning, now did you two break up yet?”

“No, Erin.”

She sighed before rolling her eyes and looking at you in disbelief.

“Nobody likes him! Dump his ass! And I don't like the way he treats you. Truth be told, I've never liked him.”

“But I like him!” You exclaimed and she gave you a blank stare.

“Yeah, only you and his bald headed mother. You could do so much better. Oh! Who did you meet yesterday when you went to workout with Ja’Marr? I guess you fell asleep and never read my text.”

“Joe Burrow. He plays quarterback.”

“Oohh, he's cute! I heard about him transferring here. Break up with Trevor and date him! There, problem solved.”

“ERIN!”

“What? You have addressed me by my name a lot this morning. I like my plan and I think it'll work. Besides, he's a sucky ass baseball player. My goal is to get my best friend to become a WAG and being with him is not going to get you very far. He didn't even get a scholarship here. He was a walk-on!”

“I have literally only met that man one time and yeah I've said your name a lot because how do you wake up this unhinged!?”

“So? Love at first sight is an actual thing. I wasn't there, but I know it happened. And it's been that way since we were three.”

“And he did help me with my pull ups yesterday.” You told her as you shrugged your shoulders.

“I'm going to start planning the wedding when we leave. My class doesn't start until one today.” She replied as she smiled at you.

“I…-”

“What are you two going on about over here?” Your other friend Alisha asked as she sat her bag down to the left of her.

“Y/N is getting married to Joe Burrow! We have to start planning!”

“Erin, shut up!”

“Oh, but he's cute. Do you know if he has any brothers?” Alisha replied as she sat down on the other side of you.

“I.. don't but I will find out for you.”

“And slip them my number while we're at it.”

“He helped her during their workout yesterday. At this point, we can say it was their first date.”

“Erin telling everyone's business as usual.”

“Hey! I'm just good at storytelling! And he had the perfect view of your ass if he helped you with your pull ups now that I think about it.”

“Sometimes I honestly cannot believe you're my best friend.” You said as you couldn't contain your laughter anymore.

“And you aren't getting rid of me any time soon.”

Gymnastics practice was always long and draining so you knew what to expect every time. They typically lasted for three hours and when you were finished, you either got breakfast on campus or went back to your apartment to make something as Ja'Marr would also be blowing up your phone to feed him even though he was on an entire meal plan just like you were.

After taking a shower and throwing on some leggings along with an LSU sweatshirt and your converses, you started to walk out the building with Erin since Alisha had to hurry up to get to her class on time, when you spotted Joe.

Of course, Erin noticed too and squealed.

“Ooh, there goes your man!”

“Erin, be quiet! I don't want him to hear you! You are too loud for it to be eight in the morning!”

“Why not? And I'm always loud. I'm responsible for this love connection and I'm going to be the maid of honor. He NEEDS to know me.”

Joe had turned around and once he spotted you began making his way over.

“Oh shit, here comes your husband!”

“I hate you. I hate you so much right now.”

“You'll get over it.” Erin said as she smiled.

“Morning princess. Just got out of practice?” He asked as he came up to both of you.

“Morning and yes. Now I'm going to stuff my face. Oh Joe, this is my best friend Erin.”

“Hey Erin, pleasure to meet you.”

“You too and the pleasure is all mine.” She said and you couldn't help but laugh quietly to yourself.

“I was actually going to get food if the two of you wanted to come with me.”

“Y/N will go! I have class but she is free ALL MORNING. So I'm going to go and Y/N, I'll text you later. Have fun you two.” Erin practically yelled and you looked at her as if she was crazy.

“And then there were two. Where did you want to go to eat?” Joe asked as Erin had started to walk away.

“You're from Ohio, so you need to get a taste of some good southern cooking that makes you feel like you have just gained ten pounds.”

“Lead the way.”

“We're going on a little adventure off campus, my car is just over there. I think you'll like it.”

Less than a mile from campus was Louie's Cafe that had amazing breakfast as well as brunch foods. Anything that you could possibly think of they served.

On the ride over, the two of you just made small talk and when both of you had placed your orders for your food, you wanted to see how he was feeling for his first game that he would be playing in on Sunday because you already knew Ja'Marr was a nervous wreck.

“How are we feeling about Sunday? You nervous?” You asked as you took a small sip of orange juice.

“A little bit and I can admit it. I mean I played when I was in Ohio, but I was the backup. Now I'm actually starting. A lot of pressure on my shoulders and I feel like I have something to prove. I want them to be able to see that they made the right choice.” Joe told you and you were clinging to every word.

“But that's so exciting! What made you transfer here though out of all places?”

“I didn't want to be sitting on a bench for four years. I wanted to be able to play. I know that I'm good, but I just need a chance to show it.”

“Hmm, I do love a man with confidence. Well I'm very excited for you and my brother. I hate how you guys aren't playing here, but I'll make sure I'm watching.”

“Always confident, never cocky. And I'll try to get my first win as a starting quarterback for you.” He responded as he gave you a small smile.

“I can't wait to see it happen so once you get back here, we can celebrate. I can cook, so I can make you something.”

“I've been craving something my mom makes all the time, Snickers Salad.” Joe replied and you looked at him confused.

“Um? Is that an Ohio thing? Because I have no idea what that is.”

Joe nodded as he laughed and your waiter had set your plates down on the table in front of you.

“It is, but I can always text you the ingredients you need to make it. I figured you could do it justice since Ja'Marr never stops talking about how well you cook.”

“You need my number to be able to do that.” You Cheekily said, but he fired right back.

“Mine is in yours, already. I put mine in when we first got here since I want to be able to see more of these special spots you know about.” Joe confidently told you as he was pouring syrup on his banana pecan pancakes that had been recommended by you.

“I've literally only known you now for about 36 hours and I can say that I like being around you.”

“Good, because I like being around you too.”

Just then your phone rang and of course it was no one other than Ja'Marr.

“Pebbles! Are you at Louie's Cafe!?!? And you didn't take me!? I checked your location! I'm hungry too!”

“I took Joe instead because he doesn't get on my nerves like you do.” You told him as you stabbed your eggs.

“WAIT, you took Joe!?!?”

“Yes, say hi. You're on speaker.”

“Hey Ja'Marr.” Joe said as he was trying not to laugh.

“Joe, just make sure my sister gets me something to go. I'm about to starve messing with her ass.”

“I got you.”

“Bye, baby brother.”

“Wait! I didn't give you my order!”

“Text it to me, bye.”

Once you hung up and placed your phone back on the table, you looked back up at Joe to see him staring at you.

“When do you have class?”

“Not until one.”

“You want to do some more exploring with me? I feel that it's now my obligation as your unofficial tour guide.”

“I get to be around a pretty girl so I'm all for it.”

“Joe, you do know that I have a boyfriend right?” You asked as your face heated up.

“Someone as pretty as you, I'm not surprised. But what does that have to do with me?” He asked as he winked at you.

This is the first time in your life that you were speechless.

#joe burrow #joe burrow fanfiction #joe burrow lsu #joe burrow x black reader #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow fluff #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow fic #joe shiesty #cincinnati bengals #nfl imagine #Spotify

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ericscroptop · 2 months ago

Text

Teacher’s Pet

✧ pairing: student teacher! eric x fem student! reader

✦ genre: smut

✧ warnings: 18+ (minors DNI), smut, male receiving, filthy oral sex, hand job, so much spit, dirty talk, praising, pet names, cursing, kissing, filthy, obsessive reader, power imbalance? public sex? like one comment of degradation (reader is called a slut once), perverted, nasty, messy reader and eric

✦ word count: 5.7k words

✧ synopsis: you’re in your own world, not really a social butterfly and just going about your business in focusing on your education. that is, until your professor’s student teacher catches on to how you’re not so innocent and proper after all.

✦ note: if this type of pairing bothers you, then do not engage! always remember that all my work is purely fiction.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚

Thursday. The day of the week you looked forward to the most.

Every Tuesday and Thursday, you had a Geology lecture to attend.

The course was held during the evening, meaning class would end while it was dark out now because of the recent time change. You kinda hated that.

This course also had no real relation to your major. It wasn’t of any interest to you. You needed a generic science credit, so you had to take it as one of your requirements to graduate.

While picking classes and scheduling for the semester, you happened to have no other choice than to pick this Geology class.

In all honesty though, the content and course in itself wasn’t too bad. Sometimes, lessons of the different types of rocks or volcanoes did activate your brain. Only sometimes.

And, the reason you looked forward to coming to class every Thursday was because your professor was accompanied by a special guest: Eric Sohn.

Your professor had a teaching assistant to work alongside him. You’ll never forget the first day you were introduced to him. You’ve genuinely never seen anyone more handsome than him in your entire life.

Eric Sohn served as one hunk of a man. It’s so shallow and shameful of you to reduce him to sole eye candy, but how could you help it?

There was a juxtaposition between him and other teachers you’ve had in the past.

First things first, he’s a graduate student. He has to be only a few years older than you. Right off the bat, he was obviously more intriguing than the other old geezers (no offense) and middle-aged professors that worked here.

His looks also will immediately hit you like a truck with just one tiny peek at him. The features he was blessed with were hypnotic. His face was crafted beautifully, having honey skin that highlighted those sharp features of his.

On most occasions, thick black frames perched over his prominent nose. He also never slacked off with his outfits, coming to class every week in business casual attire that seemed more elevated with that pretty face of his and unique details.

What made him stand out apart from his handsome and youthful face were the unique coverings that painted and pierced through his skin and body.

The curved barbell on his left eyebrow, silver hoops dangling from his earlobes, and classic black ink that covers one of his forearms makes him look far from ordinary.

It fits him perfectly, bringing the Gen Z out of him that makes him easily stand out in the crowd.

You’re lucky that college exposes you to many cool-looking people. Even so, you never thought one of those people you find ever so alluring, would be one of your teachers.

Your observant-ass only further ate up anything you could pick up on or read based off his mannerisms and speech. He’d sometimes take over the lectures, leading the class instead of your main professor. You dissected the way his hands would relax into his pockets, him push his glasses up now and again, and him suck in a small breath in between talking.

Today was no different than any other time he’s present in class. You attended this course twice a week, but Eric only made an appearance on Thursdays. So you made sure to cherish that hour and thirty minutes in the same room as him extra well.

When you walked into your class and took your spot in your unassigned-assigned seat in the second to first row, you quickly noticed your main professor wasn’t present. So unlike him.

As soon as everyone settled and class begun, Eric announced that your other professor had private matters to take care of that prevented him from coming to campus today, so he’d be in full-force charge of lesson for the day.

Every other time, Eric sat on the sidelines and if he did take over class, it would be under the guidance of your other professor— or for mere assistance.

All the attention would be drawn to him, and for some reason, that made you all giddy inside.

And not to kiss his ass just because of your colossal crush on him, but he gave smooth-tongued lectures. He was an expert on the lessons he gave, very informative and not just reading straight off a powerpoint or textbook.

Maybe his looks played a major role in why you pay attention during lectures, but he really had a way of speaking.

His delivery of the material was satisfying. He’s just as well qualified to teach at the level your older professor does. Furthermore, he’s quite the entertainer, mindlessly throwing witty commentary and fun analogies with his lectures.

He knew how to keep students engaged. Without trouble he brought smiles and laughter to your faces, even getting students to willingly participate.

You on the other hand, stayed on the down low. Funny, ‘cause there isn’t much to hide when your class was on the smaller side— not auditorium-level, the amount of girls in the room could be counted with one hand as this is a male-dominated class, and you chose to sit close to the front.

Still, you remained to stay as a background character, allowing room for the regular extroverts to ask and answer questions and engage in conversations. You weren’t really the type to speak up, and kept to yourself.

Nonetheless, you still paid attention like the rest.

You stayed busy anyways with how your mind ran laps with the various daydreams you envisioned. Eric Sohn served as the main love interest of your created scenarios, constantly sweeping you off your feet and doing things to you that were anything but holy.

Poor you, always in your head, day-dreaming like it’s a disease. Eating away at your brain with fantasies about someone you definitely cannot have, and definitely does not see you in the way you view him. He must already have a lover at home, or he knows he’s hot shit and has everyone wrapped around his finger.

Your thoughts were like that of a young teenager, filled with thirsty fantasies of someone you shouldn’t even dare to see in that way. It’s so hard though; He’s too easy on the eyes.

However, you wouldn’t act on those fantasies, certainly. That’d be ridiculous. But a girl could dream.

During lecture, you diligently took notes while retaining every word and detail that leaves his mouth.

The air in the classroom today was rare. He was in control and in focus, sparking your senses even more than usual.

As much as you tried to tame your dreamy, indecorous thoughts, they couldn’t be kept quiet. You watched the man you crushed on stride while lecturing, hands clasped together and using them to gesture while speaking, making the bracelets adorning his wrists jingle slightly.

His eyes would roam around in front of him as he spoke, not focusing on anything in particular unless he was looking at the projector screen, or person who answered or asked a question.

If his eyes happened to land on you even for a split second, holding contact until he fleeted them away, a hot sensation shot up your body, palms quickly sweaty.

That further provoked you, mindlessly chewing on the end of your pen in attempt to stabilize your heart rate and mind.

You had to be an embarrassment to society, geeking out over your hot student teacher as if you were an immature teenager. Here you were, squealing internally inbetween note-taking, striving to keep your hormones under control.

He’s just too damn attractive for your own good. How can you not yearn for him and ogle, even letting your eyes zero in and lower down towards his cro—

“See you guys next week! Have a good and safe weekend. Don’t forget to stay warm, it’s getting chillier.” Eric’s voice snaps you out of your perverted trance.

Quickly, the sounds of students rising from their seats and items being packed echoed the room. Some were eager to flee out, not hesitating in heading towards the door.

A quiet sigh lets out your mouth. Whether it be from exhaustion, relief, or getting the ick from your feelings— who knows?

You’re just ready to get back to your place, have some dinner, and fall deep into sleep. When you start to get a couple steps out from your row though, a voice catches your attention.

“Miss, Y/L/N?”

You stopped in your tracks.

“Can you stay for a bit? There’s something I want to discuss with you.”

Your heart dropped to your ass.

“Sure!” you voiced, calmly walking towards the front of the room where he stood. On the inside, you were anything but that.

You cannot recall a time that you were asked to stay after for something you’re unaware of. You’ve barely had any real interactions with your professor, let alone the student teacher. So what could this possibly be about?

Everyone else exited aside from yourself and three students who were talking to Eric. You’d figure people would wanna bolt out of class as soon as possible, but there was always those students that had burning questions post-lecture. Or in this case, simply wanted to linger longer to chat it up with the coolest guy ever.

You timidly stood on the sidelines, patiently waiting for them to wrap up their conversation.

With each second that passed, it made you even more anxious. Not only did you have to chat with your professor about God knows what, but it’s with the guy that unknowingly lives in your mind rent free.

In the time it takes to wrap it up with your classmates, you’re starting to prepare yourself for the worst-case scenario. Recently, you had written and submitted a two-page report, paired with a powerpoint on a particular landmark. Honestly, the requirements for it weren’t too strict, and it was certainly nothing compared to the ten-page paper you had to write for a different course.

But, you did write it last minute, and you had a habit of taking things from the internet and just rearranging the sentence structure.

There’s a chance that he wants to chat with you to reprimand you for your work. Oh, God. If you find yourself in a case of plagiarism, you don’t know what you’ll do with yourself. You’re getting queasy just picturing it. He needs to hurry up and get this over with since you’re shitting bricks while—

“Hey, so, I wanted to talk about your recent report.”

Fuck. Here we go.

“Your report was phenomenal. I read yours already— I have yet to put in the grades, but yours was probably the best in the class.”

Huh?

He’s commending you? In-person over an amateur, half-assed assignment that was nothing in comparison to actual, well-written research reports.

I mean, it is worth a decent percentage of your grade, but still…

“Oh— wow, uh, thanks. I didn’t think it was that impressive.” there’s a mix of surprise, confusion, and relief within your tone. You give him a shy smile, loosely playing with your fingers. Your eyes don’t dart away from his, though. It’d be disrespectful to do so, and as much as the shared gaze made your body roar in flames, you needed to remain nonchalant.

“Please, you’d be surprised how many college students can’t write for the life of them.” he scoffs, smiling at the thought. It prompts you to laugh softly. You swear you see sparkles in his eyes, and that gorgeous smile of his has your heart skipping beats.

“It’s refreshing to read some good stuff. Especially from a student like yourself.”

Your eyes widen just a tad at that, not going unnoticed by Eric.

“You’re not as outspoken or talkative as the others— at least, not in class. Which, I totally get. But, it’d be nice to hear more from you.”

You still give him a polite smile, sorta sheepish at his words. It is true that you remain on the quieter side. There was a severe lack of participation from you. Curse your timidness.

“It’s always the quiet ones that always work the hardest.”

That has you blushing hard. Your unattainable crush acknowledging you and going as far as to personally applaud you for efforts you thought went unnoticed.

To be experiencing this is like a dream; You don’t want to wake up.

Even if you outwardly denied it or just shyly smiled and brushed it off on the exterior, on the inside, it boosted your confidence and made you feel like you were worth something via the eyes of someone else.

Any compliment given to you had you eating it up, craving more even after you digested it. Constantly seeking validation in any form.

“I’ve heard that it’s also the quiet ones with a colorful imagination… and are the freakiest.”

Now that gets the smile on your face to slowly falter, looking at him all paralyzed, while he just casually dips his hands in his pockets, all relaxed as if he didn’t just insinuate something outlandish.

“Wouldn’t you agree?” he nods, you still confused.

“I’m sorry, what?” you nervously laughed. If you weren’t mistaken, you’d believe he was being suggestive. Provocative, perhaps? But this couldn’t be.

He has to laugh back, amusement etched in his features at your expression. Unfortunately you seem oblivious, but luckily for you, he’s not.

“Don’t act so coy, now.” he takes a small step forward, but it’s still enough to close distance between you two. Your heart’s palpitating.

“Or are you really clueless?” he cocks his head, allowing his eyes to freely rake over your form.

The height difference isn’t striking, but his glaring makes you feel rather small. You’ve indulged in the fantasy you’ve created of him having you as he wished and vice versa in your head. But the possibility of it unveiling behold you is… hard to swallow.

“You’re not so subtle with that little act you’ve got going on. I see the way you look at me.”

Fuck.

Now is when you panic. Your face is turning red hot, and there’s this dizzy feeling that’s bestowing upon you in hearing that he’s aware of your gawking. The desire to run away and bury yourself into a hole is vastly strong right now. But there’s no escaping from this.

“Mr. Sohn, I’m really sorry… I— I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable… This is really inappropriate of me.” by this point, your eyes were growing heavy, flickering with tears threatening to break out. This was so shameful, and there’s really nothing you can do to save yourself from your disgusting behavior.

However, it surprises you when he doesn’t start spitting out rightfully-deserved berates.

Instead, his hands fly up to hold your shoulders.

“Hey, hey…. Who said it made me uncomfortable.” he utters softly while holding you, making you bite your lip to keep yourself stable. His touch and what he says has you looking at him all misty-eyed, perplexed to say the least.

He wets his lips with his tongue and snickers, looking off to the side before locking his vision back to you.

“The way you look at me and my bulge is really fucking hot.”

It feels like your ears are playing tricks on you. This has to be some sort of test, or maybe you’re too caught up in your head that this feels real.

He gestures his hand out for you to grab it, and while hesitant at first, you do. He directs your hand over his crotch, pressing it over the area.

You gasp silently in shock that you’re actually feeling his clothed dick. Eric lowly breathes, eyes still on you with a visible appetite. Your gaze wobbles from his eyes to where your hand rested underneath his.

His manhood’s seemingly begging to be let free from his slacks, cock kissing your hand through the layers with a gnawing throb.

“Is this what you want?”

This sounded like a straight-up Wattpad fantasy. Shit like this actually happened in real life? Eric Sohn was making a move on you, being so risqué. And what makes it worse is that you’re falling for it, as this is all you’ve ever hoped for.

“You really want me like this?” that’s really the best response you could come up with. There’s a possibility he’s playing tricks on you. He could be teasing you and then turn this into some sick joke.

But he continues to leer over the length of your body, particularly lingering over your chest. Mentally you hi-fived yourself for deciding on a low-cut top today. Though, having this sudden ravenous attention on you made you want to disintegrate. How can you handle this heat?

His eyes soften for a moment, grinning while moving a hand to grab hold of your chin gently. Your breathing practically stills at the contact with starry eyes.

“‘Course, baby. You’re gorgeous.” he breathes out, making you purse your lips to prevent yourself from smiling like an idiot. Your cheeks on the other hand, are definitely blushing like a bitch.

His thumb slides faintly over your cheek until it’s dangerously close to your lips, hanging just on the corner of your mouth.

“Will you show me how good of a girl you are and blow me?” his breath fans out in front of you, pussy pulsing from his plead.

Your lips part in surprise. His utterance makes you go blank, and you only stare at him with a gaze that asks if this is crossing the line.

But with the way you haven’t protested against his behavior thus far, and having knowledge of your feelings towards him, that’s enough to tell him that you’re intrigued and willing to get dirty.

He should make sure to have your verbal consent, though.

The tip of his thumb fully lands on your bottom lip, beginning to strum slowly at the appendage. His eyes are overcast with carnal desire, while yours are too entranced on him, battling with yourself to not close them, for you fear you’ll miss out on what’s in front of you.

“Words, hon.” he says sweetly. This overwhelming feeling to give yourself to him and let him have it crashes over you. The idea of this gorgeous man blessing your mouth and throat with his cock sounds heavenly.

Now that you’re living your wildest dream, put into this position, looking into his eyes up close, you’re blind to any morality. Having his attention like this makes you want to submit to anything he has to say.

You’re not thinking about how wrong this is, or how it may make you seem whorish to willingly give yourself up to him like a naive girl.

You just need to have a taste of him.

“Wanna suck you off. More than anything.” deep inside your soul and in the back of your mind, indignity resides there. But, you have this chance to be sexually frisky with this man. There was no way in hell you could pass this up.

He gives you a satisfied smirk at your answer, dropping his hand from your face and giving you a nod.

“On your knees.” he instructs.

Despite your confident words, your heart’s pounding. You find his attractiveness intimidating, so as weak and desperate as you are for him, you hope he be the same for you.

You kneel down in front of him, ignoring the cold, dusty floor that you fall upon. Your hands rest over your thighs, orbs overlayed with vulnerability and form ready to offer yourself.

Eric wastes no time, the unbuckling and loosening of his belt ringing in your ears. You swear you start to feel arousal pool in your panties just from that.

His pants drop to his ankles shortly after, eye-level with his dick that pushes up against his briefs, looking tight and bulky.

You shift slightly and blink anxiously. Although your core is whirling in excitement, you turn to the door of the classroom, praying nobody walks in or will be aware of what’s about to happen in this very room.

Eric understands, but he needs your mouth now before any more anxieties get to you. And he’s already falling for the temptation of you sat like a good girl for him, all pretty-faced with your breasts perked out, proving his neediness for you even more.

“This is all between me and you, baby girl. Don’t act so innocent now. Put those thoughts into action.” he says softly while palming himself, groaning softly while he gives himself a few caresses.

That beautiful sound of his gets you to whimper weakly, making him raise a brow and chuckle at the ounce of sound.

“Want me to make your dreams come true, hon?” Hm?”

You wet your lips and plead with your eyes before reminding yourself to use that mouth of yours as well. “Let me help you.” you murmured.

That cues him to free his cock, briefs joining his pants at the bottom while his entire length springs up, meeting it in all its glory.

Eric grabs it, tauntingly waving it in front of you, your pupils following and processing his hefty size, especially fixating on his pink tip.

“It’s all yours. Have at it.” with that, he lets go of his shaft and you reach to let it grace your dominant hand, starting off with a light hold.

The feeling of your hand over his length has his breath hitching, more so when your finger tips start outlining a vein and caressing his cock skin, getting comfortable with him.

His bottom is leaning against the teacher’s desk, hands holding onto the edge of it as you finally touch him with your lips. You drag and pucker your lips to greet his cock calmly at first, giving his tip nice kisses and tasting it by tonguing at his slit.

That causes him to hiss and provide you with a lazy smile.

“Cute, hmm… Sweet girl.” he coos, mesmerized when you give his blushed tip one last smooch before letting your tongue hang out to smooth it over the underside of his length, dragging it all the way to the top and flashing him with a seductive gaze.

You left behind your saliva and savored the taste of his skin, treating his shaft like the yummiest popsicle you’ve been dying to try.

Eric’s lips part, hissing out a curse word at that dangerous, sultry look of yours as you lick up on him. That dirty side of you that you kept veiled is coming out for him to see.

The chance to comment on your teasing is ripped away from him when you suddenly envelop your lips around his head, one hand on his base gripping him with just enough effort while your mouth got to sucking some of his cock to start off.

It makes him immediately throw his head back, throat rumbling from the sensation, cock fluttering.

Your movements are not rushed at all to begin with, stroking his cock with your mouth at a calm rhythm and stopping for a second when you reached his tip again. Repeating this process a couple times.

You stayed with this pace until you felt the need to take a minor break, removing yourself entirely from his length to take a breather.

You licked your lips and still gave him stimulation with your hand while you were off, lubricating him with the saliva you’ve left behind and ensuring to spread the precum that’s shining from his tip.

“I knew you’d treat me good…. Little vixen.” he compliments you, bringing a hand to one side of your head, holding some hair that threatened to cover that gorgeous face of yours.

You stretched your body up, squeezing your thighs together and breasts to express how turned-on this got you.

Bubbles of spit emerged from your lips as you looked up at him with pouty-eyes, honeyed look such a contrast from the dirty work your mouth’s doing.

With a hand still resting on the side of your face, he guides your mouth back to his shaft.

Readily, you open up and take him into your moist entrance, grabbing hold of his thighs for security while you allow him to take control of your movements.

Eric’s incapable of holding out against the urge to push his hips towards the source that’s granting him divine pleasure. So, he thrusts into your mouth and you allow it, accommodating to being driven deeper by relaxing your jaw and sticking out your tongue.

He bobs you over his cock repeatedly, every other couple shoves closer to his end than the last.

Your lips sucked and squeeze his girthy length, saliva building up as you sucked him off, creating wet sounds. The farther he pushed you, it felt like you were swallowing him. His fat cock buried inside your mouth, making you whimper at the fullness that consumed you.

“Shhhhh… Be good for me, sweetie. You can take it, yeah?” he coaxes, pushing you further and stopping once your mouth was fully stuffed and nose touched his pubic bone.

Choking on his entire cock dazed you, trying your best to remain calm and let him hold you for a bit in this position before you needed fresh air.

The groans of his were gratifying, altering your brain chemistry from his sounds and having him shove your throat full of his fatty meat. You wanted to prove to him that you deserved this. That you’re a girl he’ll never forget.

He pulls you off after some seconds pass, hand falling to his side and you immediately gasped for air, brows knitted together as you coughed. You were slobbering, spit raining down your chin.

You hate wasting time though so once you collect yourself, you dive down towards his ballsack, navigating your tongue along his sack and lower shaft, licking up on him with a teasing smile and breathy laugh.

You then starts to kiss his balls affectionately, sucking them with eager in between. Nose-deep into his sack, his wet shaft taps your head, your insides swirling from indulging in his package.

“Cock drunk, aren’t ya, eh? he sneers, amused by your head game and breathing heavily from such.

You simply continue smiling, and stick your tongue out. Eric grabs hold of his cock, slapping his tip over it lightly three or four times, you humming at this heavy feeling.

Your core shivers from his dark, dilated eyes blaring down into you. In front of you, Eric’s enjoying the view and service you provide to him. Being on your knees, face growing messier by the second, seeing the sneak peek of your tits in that top, and that cheeky smile of yours is driving him mad.

He knows for a fact that you’re gonna make him bust soon.

Ardently, your mouth finds itself closing over his length again. A hand of yours holds his wet base while you go to town on him, blowing only halfway and flicking your tongue back and forth.

Eric’s so greedy, and decides to challenge you once more by grabbing a fistful of some of your hair to have a hold on you. He doesn’t aggressively pull on you, though. He just wants to keep you in just the right spot while he starts boning into your mouth again.

He bites down on his bottom lip before letting go to part his lips in bliss, moaning from your increased sounds of slurping and squelching. It’s insanely hot and wet, fucking up his senses in the best way possible.

“You may act like a sweetheart, but you suck cock like a fucking slut.” he grunts out, getting your pussy to clench from him referring to you as such. You’d suck his dick like a slut for him any time, any where.

His free hand maneuvers to your chin, holding you even more fastened. He doesn’t let up dragging you over his length, having hold on you to keep you just where he wants you.

Tears brim your eyes, vision blurry as you swallow and are stuffed full of girthy cock. He face fucks you into oblivion, incessantly bullying your throat. There’s a chance he’d bruise your soft palate, but getting him off meant more than temporary pain.

The amount of spit that soaked his manhood had you gurgling, splash-like sounds on repeat like a song. Those smutty noises push his drive even more, chasing after the high that’s calling to him. Almost there.

You moaned and hummed around him. Partly because you were also aroused at the sounds being produced, but also because your jaw was sorta starting to burn. There was no intent on stopping, though.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby girl.” his throat rumbles, largely from the vibrations of your moans stimulating his shaft further.

Air was getting knocked our of your lungs, and he further pushed your limits by bringing your face against his pubic bone again. Your lips stretched out as far as you could get them to, nose squished against his skin, with your bottom lip and chin touching his sack.

His cock fully down and inside the canal of your mouth/throat has him spacing out, consumed in the feeling of you taking care of his beloved manhood incredibly well.

Tears burn your eyes and one or two even manage to slip down to your cheek. His girthy cock is jammed-packed in your mouth, feeling clogged up and overloaded. It has you pressing your nails sharply into the skin of his thighs. Eric releases guttural groans, motivating you to stay strong.

After a moment, he kindly pulls you off. You’re tugged off with a large heave paired with choked mewls. Bubbles and foam of your drool slip down his length, tears staining your cheeks from the intensity.

Your face is definitely fucked up thanks to his cock, but Eric looks down at you with heavy lidded eyes, mesmerized by the ironically holy sight that looks so attractive from his perspective.

“Pretty girl.”

You whimpered at his remark, inching over to his balls to hide yourself and finish your job. You’re growing tired, but you sensually kiss and suckle some more at his hefty sack, ensuring to provide them with equal attention.

You could swear this gets him to let free a whimper, and so you persist with playing with them. You burrow and brush your nose and mouth against his balls, dreamy smile radiating your features.

Eric in concert grabs a hold of his cock, stroking and gripping himself in the right spots. He pumps his slippery shaft, head spinning from the touches, cock growing more stiff and breathing as heavy as ever.

“Shit, almost there.” he rasps, all tensed.

“Lemme cum down your throat.” he requests, knowing that it will be rapturous.

Plus, it would be easier to empty out down your throat instead of on your face, or anywhere else.

Eager to drain him dry, you swiftly swing up and over his shaft one last time.

Hard, but lazily, he jerks and twitches in your mouth, dominant hand holding onto your hair strands. He grunts and growls while exploding spurts of his seed inside your mouth.

Your eyes are shut, soaking in the sensation of him impregnating your mouth.

His hard cock pulsates, cum blazing as it releases. When he finally stops twitching, you swipe your tongue over his tip to make sure every last drop ends up in the right place.

He pulls out, his labored breathing serving as background noise while you swirl the thick consistency of his nut around, savoring him before letting it all slide down your throat.

You covered your mouth politely while swallowing, (even though there’s no point in being well mannered after giving him an untamed blow job) ensuring none of it spills out and all travels down you esophagus.

His body and psyche feels weak after orgasming, and his spine shivers while he catches his breath, but he still attempts to look at you: blinking in a daze, sniffling and licking at your lips.

Paired with messy, out-of-place hair, there’s a big ring around your mouth and nose area that no longer matches the rest of your face. He throat-fucked most of your makeup off, making him chuckle at your appearance and appreciating your devoted labor.

“You’re so fuckin’ sexy. Wish you could see yourself right now.” he says in awe.

“Lemme see, open wide for me.” he then refers to showing him that you drank him up all the way.

Obeying, you open and stick out your tongue, giving him that proud look of a girl who swallowed every last bit of cum given to her.

“That’s a good girl. A really good girl.” he smirks, letting a hand down to the top of your head, patting your head delicately.

That has your cheeks swelling in fulfillment, cunt just as happy to hear that praise from the way it tingles.

His hand slithers lower towards your mouth, swiping affectionately at your corner. Although you already showed how strongly you felt about him with your head game, you impulsively grabbed that same hand. You direct it to your lips, kissing the skin of his knuckles, eyes remaining on him as you dropped those soft pecks.

Through his glasses, you can see lust and fascination present in his eyes. More strings start pulling him towards you, past the literal strings of saliva that attached you to his cock earlier.

To your surprise, he falls to the ground, now leveled with you.

“You okay, hon?” he coos suddenly, realizing he hasn’t respectfully checked in on if you were alright from what just went down.

Your eyes soften when his do, and you twinkle at him. “Yeah.” you murmured.

He observes your blotchy, smudged, and streaked face again, biting his lower lip with a broad smile.

“Such a messy baby.” That was so hot. So good for me.”

In the blink of an eye, his lips are on yours. While a bit shocked, you fall smoothly into the kiss gladly. He kissed you tenderly, passion burning through the movement of one another’s appendages. You were kissing Eric Sohn. Your student teacher.

“Whatcha say we go back to my place and get you cleaned up and taken care of, hm? Sound good?”

This is all unethical, but how could you pass this up? Nothing mattered except for the man you just gave the sloppiest top to. This is pathetic of you, but you needed more of him. And you reckon he wants to get to know more of you, too.

“Okay.” you grinned.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ˚

#ericscroptop #eric sohn #the boyz #tbz eric #eric sohn imagines #eric sohn x reader #eric smut #eric sohn smut #eric the boyz #eric sohn scenarios #the boyz imagines #tbz x reader #tbz smut #the boyz smut #tbz fanfic #kpop smut #kpop imagines #kpop

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rambling-at-midnight · 30 days ago

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Whatever You Need

Request: Jason helping reader through their period

Pairing: Jason Todd x afab!Reader

Summary: Your period takes you by surprise. Luckily, Jason's there to take care of you.

Word count: 1.6k

Sorry this took so long... I started four different Jason fics, which means none were finished. But they should be finished and posted sometime soon.

Sprawled on the couch in your pajamas, watching an episode of The Great British Bake-Off that you’ve seen at least twice before, you feel the first twinge of pain in your abdomen. You don’t think much of it at first, which is a mistake. There are still two days before your period is supposed to start, and you ate ice cream after dinner even though you’re lactose intolerant and ran out of Lact-Aid a couple days ago. You figure you’ll head to the bathroom to deal with the consequences of your actions if the need arises, but you’re too comfortable to move when the weighted blanket on top of you has a name and that name is Jason Todd.

You’ve been on bedrest (or couchrest) for the past week and a half after a bad fall in the rain during patrol twisted your ankle. It swelled to twice its normal size. The upside was that it happened during winter break so you didn’t have to make the choice between limping to class or skipping. The downside was that you wanted your superhero persona to have more of a presence with Gotham’s goons. As a part-time hero, unlike Jason and most of his family, you get much less respect when suited up than, say, the Red Hood.

As a contestant’s dough fails to rise and they begin to have a breakdown on the screen, your stomach cramps again.

Sometimes, if you ignore it, the pain will go away. You’re too comfortable to get up now.

To distract yourself, you run your fingers through Jason’s messy curls. He doesn’t have a wash routine, so they’re always frizzier than Dick’s, but you’ve never minded. He’s devastatingly handsome either way. At least like this he looks a little bit less like something come to life straight out of your fantasies. He’s just a little more real.

Jason hums sleepily and pushes his head into your hands, a bit like a cat nuzzling at you. It’s been a lazy day for you both. You’ve been in the same position on the couch for hours—you on your back, half-watching the show, half-dozing, and him on his stomach in the cradle of your legs, head pillowed on your stomach, not even pretending to watch the show, judging by his closed eyes.

Your stomach cramps again, and this time you feel it—the ache even lower, and a wet heat blooming between your thighs. “Oh, fuck me.”

Jason takes a minute to respond, still interested in your fingers that make his entire body tingle when you massage in just the right way. Then he cranes his neck up, brow furrowed and bottom lip jutting out with his confused frown. “Okay?” He starts to sit up, hands reaching for the hem of your shirt, but you draw your legs up and out from under him and roll off the couch.

“No, not literally,” you say through gritted teeth. “Fuck—did I stain the cushion?” It was no big loss—you’d found the couch on the side of the road and Jason helped you bring it up to your apartment and sanitize it—but a bloodstain would stand out on the light brown color.

“Oh,” he says with realization as you run to the bathroom and slam the door behind you. “The couch is good!” he calls.

Your pants aren’t. It looks like someone died between your legs. You’ve always had heavy periods, especially the first couple days, accompanied by strong cramps. If you get ahead of them and take pain meds, they’re not too bad. Sometimes you can even patrol. But playing catch-up with ibuprofen is a recipe for disaster.

The rest of the day is going to suck.

Because you always feel gross when you’re on your period, and because no amount of wipes would fully clean up the mess between your legs, you hop into the shower and turn up the heat until your skin is bright pink. Jason pops in for a second to drop off a change of underpants and sweats, then ducks out just as quickly.

Turning off the water starts the race against time. As quickly as you can, you apply your preferred hygiene product before any more blood can leak down your leg. Then you towel off and shrug on the new clothes. You still feel icky, but the new clothes and shower helped slightly.

Something sizzles in the kitchen when you open the bathroom door.

“Hey, honey,” says Jason without turning around, standing in front of the stove. He points at the table. “Meds and water are right there. How are you feeling?”

“Ugh,” is your response. You down the pills and almost set the glass back on the table, but at his insistent look, finish it off. Hydration helps with cramps as well.

“You’re two days early.”

“Well, I haven’t been patrolling. Exercise changes can throw my cycle out of whack.” You sniff. “What are you making? It smells good.”

“Chicken stir fry.” You peek into the pan and see broccoli, bell peppers, and a couple other vegetables frying with the chicken. The covered pan behind it, you know without looking, contains rice. “I also have ginger tea brewing.”

All of it, every part of the meal, is meant to help reduce your symptoms and pain.

You can’t help it. How is he always so thoughtful? You throw your arms around Jason’s middle and squeeze. So he can keep stirring the food, he shifts until you’re tucked beneath one arm. His hair is in complete disarray from your fingers like he just walked through a tornado. When he notices your gaze, red colors his cheeks and he flattens his hair down self-consciously.

You press a kiss to his shoulder, the highest place you can reach without stretching.

“Go sit down,” he pretends to scold.

In response, you lean into him, heavier and heavier, until he’s practically carrying you. Jason doesn’t even blink at the added weight.

“I plugged in your heating pad,” he says. “It’s right by the couch.” Another thing right next to the couch is a coffee table he stole from the manor when he was pissed at Bruce. On top of it is a bar of dark chocolate and a freshly-washed bowl of your favorite berries.

You kiss his shoulder again. Jason kisses the top of your head, then nudges you away with his chin. “Go. Sit down. Rest your ankle and your uterus.”

“That is not how it works,” you say, mirth in your voice.

“It’s how I think it works,” he mumbles.

When the food is done, he brings two bowls over. You lift your legs and he slips underneath them. He uses your shins on his thighs as a makeshift table, balancing the bowl between them, and absentmindedly rubs your weaker ankle with the hand not holding his spoon.

The two of you eat in comfortable silence as The Great British Bake-Off plays. You finish first, and as soon as he sets his bowl down, you sit up slightly and make grabby hands at him. “C’mere.”

Jason pretends to roll his eyes, but judging by the line of kisses he trails from your wrist to the inside of your elbow as he lies down, he doesn’t mind your bossiness too much.

You shiver at every brush of his lips against the sensitive skin of your forearm. It’s almost enough to distract you from the cramping that’s beginning in your abdomen again—a cramping that eases slightly when he’s atop you again, resting the gentle pressure of his weight on your stomach. Warm, fed, and with his weight on you, is it any wonder you fall asleep?

You’re only woken by Jason’s gentle hand shaking you, telling you that it’s been eight hours since you last applied your feminine hygiene product and you need to change it. You’re tired and sore and cranky, but as soon as you blink your eyes open he has pain medication and water for you to take.

You do so in the bathroom in a daze and tumble into your shared bed, tugging Jason in with you. He goes down easily, using his huge, warm form to surround you with his easy, comforting scent. You left the heating pad on the couch, but the thick arm Jason winds around your stomach does the job well enough, and you drift back to sleep quickly, never fully awake in the first place.

The next morning, you wake to an aching back and stained sheets.

You stare up at the ceiling and swear, which unfortunately wakes Jason, who lifts his head and stares at you, one eye still crusted with sleep. His curls are in wild disarray, one side flattened from the pillow and the other on end as if he’s been spending his spare time sticking forks in electrical sockets.

If the cramps have gotten to your spine already, then the next few days are going to be hell. And this was a nice pair of sheets! The blood had better wash out.

Jason grunts and lowers his head. “Everything we own is bloodstained, honey. Though usually it’s mine.”

You leave him in bed. Your hair feels way too greasy, and your skin feels tacky, and even after a half-hour shower, you still don’t feel great.

As soon as you step out of the bathroom, Jason is there with chocolate-chip pancakes he made himself, accompanied by a fresh bowl of fruit and more meds.

Emotion rises in your throat. You want to tell him so much, like that you love him even though you haven’t said it, or that you can’t fathom going through your period on your own anymore, but all that comes out is, “You’re perfect. You know that? You really don’t have to do all this—or stay home from patrol for me.”

Jason tousles his messy curls and shrugs. “Well, I’m gonna anyway. You need me, and I’m here for you. Whatever you need.”

DC Taglist

@evalynanne @mismatchsposts @cliosunshine @fictionalwhor3 @bellathecatastrophe @lonely-star2044 @flanhog @pastelsweaters-and-bubble-t

Let me know if there's anything you want to see from me!

#reader insert #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x y/n #jason todd fic #jason todd x you #dc insert

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the-witty-pen-name · 1 month ago

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New Years, New Beginnings

Steve Harrington x PlusSize!F!Reader

Summary: You don’t believe he’s sincere any time Steve Harrington has asked you out. It’s not until a messy New Year's Eve confession that you realize you may have been wrong.

Warnings: 18+ for suggestive content; cursing; body image issues/insecurity; mentions of bullying; miscommunication; slight angst; horniness but no smut; slightly sub!steve if you squint

Word Count: 3.0k

You pride yourself on graduating Hawkins High as inconspicuous as possible. You detest attention in most forms and your priority was moving through those three years avoiding most of your peers. Describing yourself as shy was an understatement. Your preteen and teenage years were riddled with the most intense insecurity.

You were never bullied for your appearance- at least not directly. However, you absorbed every look and every offhand comment like a sponge. You were very aware of the space you took up in a room and how different you felt compared to your friends. As a kid, you remember when you caught on to the way your Halloween costumes were always homemade while your friends had no issue fitting into store bought costumes. You feel like you stand out in group pictures so you slouch, and suck in your tummy and stick out your chin- overtime it just became second nature to contort yourself to fit into boxes.

Despite your best efforts, you did unfortunately catch the attention of one person in particular. King of Hawkins High- the infamous Steve Harrington with his infuriating hair.

You were blessed with the misfortune of having to sit behind him in study hall. He would turn around and pester you constantly. He seemed to enjoy making you uncomfortable and even though you would ignore him, it seemed to just incite him to tease you more.

He’d sit in his chair backwards and cross his arms to rest them over the top. He’d rest his chin on his arms and stare at you, or watch your hands as you worked on your homework. He’d annoy you with stupid questions, or take your pens.

“What kind of movies do you like?” he’d ask, out of the blue after an annoying amount of staring you’d effectively ignore.

“I don’t know,” you answer, without looking up. You’d offer a shrug and then just move on to the next math problem.

“They’re playing the Star Wars movies at the drive-in,” he volunteers and you love Star Wars. However, you can’t bring yourself to say anything. He’s baiting you. And you refuse to bite.

He eventually got the hint and let you be. He slowly turned around and focused his attention on the clock at the front of the classroom.

It was the worst type of teasing, the faking interest- the attempts to make you think he’d be legitimately interested. You knew the outcome already; you’d seen that teen movie and you refuse to be the victim in that cruel game.

He’d wait at your locker and you’d turn the other way when you saw him in the distance. He’d lean against your locker, looking around expectantly for Tommy and Carol, you’d assume, to see if they were watching. You’d wait until the bell rang and risk being late to class before walking up to him at your locker.

When you would get there before him, he’d come out of nowhere. He’d sneak up on you and lean on the locker next to yours. He’d smile with that signature look of his and you refused to let yourself acknowledge how great it was. Your heart would tug, wishing it was real if you let yourself dwell on it.

“You don’t like me,” he’d smirk, like he was trying to break some code to you. “We should really go out and talk about it.”

You’d be in the cafeteria lunchline, moving through the stations with your tray. Steve would cut-in next to you. Everyone loved him so no one cared when he’d cut the lunch line. He’d slide in close to you, and you’d ignore the way his cologne always smelled so good.

“So the lasagna, huh?” he’d smile, looking at the contents on your tray. “Do you like Italian?”

“It’s fine,” you grumble, moving down the line.

“You ever been to Enzo’s?” he asks and you realize he doesn’t even have his own tray. He’s just here to mess with you. “They have really good lasagna. We should go.”

You get to the register to pay and Steve beats you to it, offering a few bills to the lunch lady. “It’s on me, sweetheart,” he flirted, and you just walked away.

Unbeknownst to you, Steve Harrington was pathetically in love with you. Past the suave and charming exterior and his overcompensation of unfound confidence, Steve had been pining after you since the summer you moved to Hawkins, right before 10th grade. He thought you were the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. He thought your shyness was endearing and he liked that he seemed to make you nervous- because maybe that meant you felt the same way about him. After a year of rejection, Steve finally decided to leave you alone because you made it clear you wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.

Steve didn’t realize how he was coming across to you. He’d never had to think about things like you had. At school and amongst his peers, he didn’t need to have his guard up all the time like you felt you needed. His experiences with social interactions didn’t prepare him for the way you reacted to his advances. He was used to adoration and popularity, he didn’t face rejection. Both of you, with completely opposite experiences, couldn’t figure out or make sense of the other. You shrouded in your defences and Steve was stung for the first time.

Like a cliche, you’re back in your parents’ town for Christmas and New Years. It’s been a few years since you’d been back for longer than a weekend stay. Now, you’ve managed to get enough time off approved that you arrived before Christmas and will leave shortly after New Years. So far, you've done an excellent job avoiding anyone from school. You had friends you wanted to see, of course. But you skillfully avoided any chance encounter by dodging the errands your mom attempted to pass off to you.

Your luck had run out when she pulled you aside and told you to go out and get a few movies for you and your parents to watch together. Which is how you ended up at Family Video on a random Thursday and ending up face to face with Steve Harrington.

When you walked in, you immediately saw him at the counter and the two of you made eye contact for maybe a couple of seconds before you averted your eyes and headed down one of the aisles. It’s fine, you rationalize as you pretend to look at the cases, high school is far enough behind us that he won’t remember me at all.

It was only a few minutes before your grand entrance back into his world that Steve was complaining to Robin about his nonexistent dating life. Robin does her best to help him out of the slump he seems to have found himself in lately, but he can’t seem to ever feel like his old self. When you walked in, he couldn’t even believe his eyes. But just like before, you immediately dodge him.

“Oh shit,” Robin smiles, immediately recognizing you. “Hey!” She saunters over and Steve watches from the front counter. He watches the way seeing Robin has brought a huge smile to your face.

“Oh my god, Robin!” You exclaim happily, pulling her in for a hug. Out of the many people who went to Hawkins High, Robin is probably one of the only people you’d be happy running into.

The two of you talk and catch up, and Steve stares at the computer screen pretending to keep busy while simultaneously attempting to eavesdrop on your conversation. He straightens his posture when he sees Robin bringing you up to the register. He doesn’t acknowledge you as Robin checks out your movies.

“Don’t forget, 7- okay?” Robin says with a wave when you leave. The bell rings and then Steve turns to look at Robin expectantly. “What?” she asks, scrunching her nose at him in annoyance.

“Did you fucking invite her to New Years Eve?” he asks incredulously. She nods.

“Uh yeah- she’s my friend, I figured you’d be fine with that,” she responds, but raises an eyebrow, “Did I do something wrong?”

“Do you remember when I told you about that girl I liked in the tenth grade-”

“Holy shit!” Robin exclaims, spinning around on the stool she sat on. “That’s insane,” she continues, “She was like the only cool person in my lab- we talked all the time.”

“She hated me, probably still does,” he shrugged, and Robin rolled her eyes.

“You were a douchebag,” Robin reasons.

“Not to her!” Steve insisted. “I asked her out like a thousand times- I really liked her. I wasn’t a douche… I don’t think.”

“You had a reputation Steve,” Robin points out, “Even if you didn’t necessarily do anything to her specifically, Tommy or Carol might have. Or, she just knew you were a grade-A asshole and was steering clear. You’re much better now.”

“Gee, thanks for that enlightening assessment,” he grumbles, sarcastically.

“At least if she shows up to the party, you can ask her,” Robin suggests, stealing a box of movie candy from one of the shelves, “Just clear the air so you can move on, you know? Get some closure, cause clearly you’re not over it.”

Had you realized that you were attending a New Years Eve party at Steve’s house, of course you wouldn’t have gone. No one greeted you at the door, it was just left unlocked for everyone to come and go as they pleased.

People filled the hallway, chatting amongst themselves or dancing to the loud music that was coming from the living room. You couldn’t hear yourself think, and you just wanted a minute to compose yourself before venturing too far into the crowd.

You navigated down the front hall, having to squeeze and push past people, and found yourself in the kitchen, and just your luck, the only person there was Steve. You hoped to immediately leave before he noticed you.

“Wait,” he pleaded, when you turned to walk out, “please, can we talk?”

You pause, and turn back to him.

“Why do you hate me so much?” He asks, and he sounds broken.

“You have a lot of fucking nerve Harrington,” you say. “You were so mean to me all the time and you have the audacity to play the victim?”

“How was I mean?” He asks and you scoff because he sounds so genuinely confused.

“You know, don’t play fucking stupid.”

“I’m not! Look I understand if I made you uncomfortable,” he explains, “I probably should’ve taken the hint that you weren’t interested and I just kept perusing it- but I thought it was a thing. I was wrong.”

“What do you mean take a hint?” You ask, tilting your head in confusion. Steve looks at you, completely dumbfounded that you seem to have no idea what he’s talking about.

“You clearly didn’t like me back,” he explains, like it’s obvious. “I wouldn’t take the hint, and I kept asking you out and it made you upset. I just thought- I thought you and I had like a little back and forth thing. I realized way too late that I was wrong.”

“Do you seriously think I’m that stupid?” You ask, your tone is incredibly harsh. “You don’t get to flip the story around to save face. You’re a terrible person Steve. It’s not fair to mess with someone’s feelings like that.”

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, “please just explain to me what I did wrong so we can work through it.”

“Don’t pretend like you weren’t just messing with me to make fun of me,” you snap, your voice beginning to tremble.

“What are you talking about?” Steve asks softly, walking towards you and for once you let him.

“I knew the whole time Steve,” you mumble, looking at the ground. “I know you weren’t actually flirting with me or asking me out all those times. I know it was a joke.”

“None of it was a joke,” he admits. “I liked you a lot. So I would try to ask you out and you’d never talk to me. I thought maybe you were shy and nervous because you liked me back so I just kept the bit going- I’m sorry. I clearly was a dick who made you uncomfortable.”

“Wait,” you say, thinking back on as many of the interactions as you can remember. “You were actually asking me out?”

“Why is that so hard to believe?” Steve counters.

You’re actually rendered speechless. You’re overwhelmed with this new information and you can’t actually bring yourself to fully believe him. There’s no way, you reason, there’s absolutely no way that Steve would’ve been interested in you.

“I mean come on,” Steve continues when you say nothing, “look at you.”

“You’re doing it again,” you respond, defeatedly.

“I’ve wanted you since we were like 15,” Steve confesses. “Fuck, I literally remember the first time I fucking saw you. Do you even remember that?”

He moves away and goes to lean against the kitchen counters behind him. He crosses his arms and looks down on the floor, kicking at nothing. You don’t know how to react to this confession. It felt like for once, you were seeing the real Steve. The one he’d been trying to show you forever but didn’t know how. And your guard had been up the whole time anyways.

“This is so stupid,” he scoffs at himself, as he remembers the day and puts himself back in the shoes of his love sick teenage self. “Summer right before tenth grade. July 8th.”

“You had just moved here and it was at the pool,” Steve continues. “You had on this black bathing suit… literally couldn’t keep it together. I couldn’t focus on literally anything else.”

You remember the day, but you don’t remember Steve being there at all. You remember feeling awkward in your suit, worried people were judging you. You almost didn’t swim, too self conscious- so you ended up sunbathing for a long while before the heat became too unbearable and you needed to jump in. You didn’t even know Steve had been there.

“I was too nervous to say anything,” he admits, “so I didn’t go up to you that day and I regretted it. I thought about you the whole rest of the summer. I thought maybe you were like visiting family or something and I’d never see you again… but when you showed up in my class, I had to just go for it. I’m sorry I didn’t just let it go.”

“But you dated Nancy… and went out with girls like Brenda and Laurie. Why would someone like you- fucking King Steve- want anything to do with a girl who looks like me?” you ask, almost sarcastically. Your walls of defense creep up again, lulling you back to safety.

Steve is finally sick of this nonsense. He’s done with dancing around the subject. He’s still in love with you, and it’s growing unbearable being in the same space as you if he can’t be near you. It’s taking over all of his senses, everything about it just consumes him whole. He can’t understand why you can’t just see how wrecked you’ve made him.

He strides over to you and cups your face in his hands. You tilt your head up to him in surprise at his gesture. Yet, you don’t pull away. He sighs, it’s a relief to even touch you as simply as this. The soft skin of your cheeks against the pads of his fingertips is enough to ground him just enough that he doesn’t spiral. He takes in a sharp breath once he realizes how close you are like this. The reaction he has to you makes you dizzy and goosebumps rise on your skin.

You don’t know who leaned in first- don’t know who started it. It was like your mind was completely white static and then you realized you and Steve were kissing. It wasn’t anything like the way you’ve ever been kissed before. It made all your senses fuzzy and your body melt into him. He couldn’t help but smile against your pretty lips when you pulled yourself closer to him. It’s all he’s wanted.

Your hands grasp tightly to the front of his tshirt, and you feel his arms wrap around your waist. His hands land on the small of your back and it feels like the skin under his touch is on fire even if it is over the material of your top. You gasp against his lips when his hands slide down to rest in the back pockets of your jeans and he pulls you even closer than before. He leans against the counter and he pulls you flush against him. Instinctively, your arms wrap around his neck. Your hands play with the ends of his hair at his neck and he moans so prettily.

“Fuck, fuck sweetheart,” he gasps, reluctantly pulling away. You pout, and all he can think looking at you with your big eyes and swollen lips that he’s so royally fucked. “I wanna talk about this.”

You nod, catching your breath, and you don’t miss how his eyes flicker to watch the rise and fall of your chest. You bite your lip to hold back a smile that’s risking to spill out. “Shit,” he sighs, finding your eyes, “I think I’m still in love with you.”

His hands are still planted firmly in your back pockets. You match his stance, trailing your hands across his slender waist and then settle them into the back pockets of his jeans. You watch as his cheeks turn bright red and the blush blossoms across the length of his neck. He’s so sweet like this, you can’t help but think to yourself.

“Oh yeah?” You tease flirtatiously. He’s convinced you could probably see his heart beating rapidly out of his chest. He gulps, his Adam’s apple bobs and you can’t help but smirk. Newfound confidence swells up through you, finally seeing the way you affect him.

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