#thanks! looking forward to things getting better and more active around here <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[valley-of-headcanons]

I just stumbled across your blog and I really love your headcanons! If you had the time, I was wondering if you could do the bachelors reacting to a mute farmer?

bachelors with a mute!farmer || headcanons

being mute isn't as hard when you have these considerate men around <3

warning: this is under the assumption that the reader cannot speak at all! all include sign language as a form of communication :) other warnings are that certain townies are VERY SLIGHTLY ableist (jodi, george). take this whole story with a grain of salt, as i am not mute! i tried my hardest, however, please let me know if something is wrong/offensive/just straight up stupid! i'd love to learn where i went wrong :)

requested by: anon, thank you so much for requesting! and i deeply apologize for the fact that this took around a year to come out ... oopsie daisy ... my stardew valley hyperfixation went bye bye but guess who's backkkk?? anyway! here you go, better late than never :)

alex

• Alex honestly had no idea what to do when he realized that you were mute. He had no idea what to do, and you saw it on his face. He wanted to interact with you, you looked pretty interesting, but ... he had no idea where to start. So, you offered to teach him sign. He was surprised to see that you had that much faith in him, and he rejected initially, but ... he really wanted to have a new friend. It seemed like you were a genuine person, and he needed that in his life. So he did.

• You taught him sign, and this was probably one of the hardest things he's done. He believes he's not very bright, so he's incredibly nervous. But he works so hard for you! He didn't really know why he did, as you were just a new neighbor. Maybe you could be more? You could be a true friend! That's what he's looking forward to the most.

• As he began getting fluent and he learned more about you, the more he enjoyed being around you. Someone actively took a chance on him, and he's forever grateful. He opened up a lot to you, and you reassured him through all of it. He was the smartest person you knew because of how well he picked up sign ... he cried a little bit, although he really doesn't want to admit that.

• He realized how close you've gotten, and how his feelings haven't stopped growing for you. So, he had to do something about it! A soft, well-candlelit dinner was prepared for you, and he asked you out fully through sign! He had worked so hard on preparing a fully thought-out speech through sign for you ... it was so incredibly sweet. He really does love you.

• Alex was incredibly defensive of you, and would probably fight anyone who tried him. He even had several arguments with George. He wasn't the most supportive and definitely had some comments, especially since he literally couldn't see the sign ... but through Alex, he was convinced. Everything was fine, especially with Alex doing his best to convince those around him.

• Overall, Alex loves you and it shows. It shows through every piece of sign that he learns, every action that he does for you, and everything that he says to you and others. He adores every aspect of you, and he loves your bravery and your amazing soul. He can't get enough of you.

elliot

• Elliot is definitely a romantic, and when you didn't respond to his minor flirting, he was very confused. But when he realized you were mute, he dramatically gasped and apologized, basically dropping to his knees. He felt horrible, and promised to make it up to you.

• For a while, you talked back and forth through letters, since he was often stuck at home writing. He finds that he can write a lot more through his letters to you than he can his own book. Isn't that strange? He brings it up to you in one of his letters, and he eventually invites you over to his cabin. He bounces ideas for his book off of you, and strangely, it's so much easier to communicate with you ... how strange.

• He ends up learning sign for you in his free time, although it takes a while due to his busy schedule. He still prefers to write letters to you, it seems much more personal and definitely more romantic. He eloquently writes about his life and inquires you about yours.

• Elliot realizes that maybe this situation isn't just romantic to be romantic ... maybe there were feelings underneath, feelings that Elliot had never truly felt before. He ended up writing poetry about you, pages and pages. He can't get you out of his head! He had to let you know. You found out through a book of poetry sitting in your mailbox, and after reading through it, it was undeniable that it was about you. He was infatuated ... and so were you.

• He's incredibly protective of you, making sure to keep you out of harm's way as much as possible. If anyone were to say so much as one hateful word to you, he'd make a scene. With his dramatic flare, he'd declare them an imbecile and swoop you away to a safe place. It's in his nature, did you think anything less?

• Elliot'e romantic side has never been greater than with you. Romance and genuine feelings have always been apart in his mind, but they've both culminated in a beautiful love with you. He doesn't mind your muteness, he finds it beautiful and inspiring. You're his muse, of course.

harvey

• Harvey is incredibly understanding, and he tried his best to understand you as much as possible! He has no problem learning how to communicate with you and how to help you out as much as possible! He's the most understanding of your condition, and asks many questions about how and why you're this way. Not in a hateful way or anything, he just wants to understand you fully!

• As your doctor, he's definitely concerned for your health at first, but his nerves are calmed eventually. He slowly works toward getting to know you despite your condition, and he loosens up a little bit. He's so sweet and kind toward you, and he can't believe he's befriended someone as lovely as you.

• He opens up about his color blindness soon enough, and how debilitating it can seem. You bond over that, and he finds it easy to open up to you. He's used to being the listener, it's literally his profession, but it's nice to be listened to for once.

• Harvey realized this was a lot more than just a friendship, due to his heart racing when he's around you ... wow. He didn't expect this, and he really doesn't know how to act on it. But as you two hang out on the pier of the beach one night, he can't help but admire you instead of the stars. You notice, and he can't hide it anymore. He asks so nervously if you feel the same way he does. You answer with a gentle kiss on his cheek. He melts.

• He is very defensive of your condition, if someone says anything slightly derogatory, he will go off on a medical tangent. He justifies everything with an array of medical terms, enough to put anyone at a loss for words. Once Harvey silences the other person, he apologizes heavily, but still defends his love.

• Harvey loves you, and it shows through his concern for you and his deep affection for you. You're such an amazing and brave person, and he admires every bit of it. He admires you more than anything, and he would reshape the world if it meant to keep you safe.

sam

• Sam, despite his loud and energized nature, doesn't mind the fact that you're mute! He finds interacting with you regulating, in some kind of way. He has to calm down a bit to concentrate on communicating effectively with you. He enjoys talking to someone who has such a different viewpoint on life!

• Sam actually knew sign language before he met you! While in the war, Kent had sent a letter home that he had gone have deaf due to the constant noise of the war. Jodi then forced her family to learn sign language as soon as possible, so communicating with him was incredibly easy!

• Being able to actually use his sign language is actually pretty fun! He's very fluent, and he enjoys seeing your personality through your sign. He also enjoys your personality in general, how you overcome not speaking and your bravery. He finds that you both enjoy music, and it's a major bonding point between the two of you.

• Showing each other different songs that you enjoy was a staple of your hangout sessions. He finds those evenings the ones that he looks forward to the most, watching you smile and bop your head to the music. It's soft, it's sweet, it's ... lovely. As his feelings approach him, he can't get you out of his head ... his writer's block comes to an end. Eventually, he ends up playing a song for you. The love that he has for you is evident through the lyrics. And then ... a soft kiss as the song goes on, you would probably scream in joy if you could.

• His mom is ... not the most fond of you being mute. He doesn't really care, as he mostly just ignores her. He loves her but good god, her views ... so, he chooses your friendship more than anything. And when you two travel to something more, he chooses that over the relationship with his mother. She has a few passive aggressive comments, but she eventually gets over it enough to only give you a few side-eyes.

• Despite every hardship, Sam loves you. Every aspect of you is perfect in his eyes, and he wouldn't change anything about you. Sam adores your wonderful personality, despite not ever really hearing a voice behind your wonderful words. He doesn't care, you're you, and that's what matters.

sebastian

• Sebastian is the most quiet of all of the bachelors, so it makes sense that he would be naturally drawn to someone with a similar vibe. He doesn't mind the fact that you don't speak, and he finds ways to adjust.

• At first, he doesn't put too much effort into learning sign language to communicate. He doesn't see the reason why, you're just another person in town. But after Sam started speaking to you through sign language and you crossed paths more ... he decided to, why not?

• After talking to you, he realized that you have a lot in common. This makes him excited to finally have someone to relate to, and more and more, he asks you to hang out. Most of the time you end up doing things together in silence, but when you do talk, it's deep and personal.

• Falling for you was not his intention and came out of absolutely no where. He thought he was destined to spend the rest of his life shrouded in darkness, but this one quiet beam of light pulled him out of that. Huh. How odd. It took a lot of mutual pining for this to come to the surface, however. You called out that he accidentally used the sign for “I love you” when saying goodbye ... his pale face went bright red. Safe to say, you didn't say goodbye that evening. A long talk and a kiss goodnight, you two ended up together. As you should be.

• He doesn't really give the time of day to the people who don't understand you. A deep side eye and an aggressive sigh usually escape him, but he tells you not to worry about it. He shows you that he loves you no matter what, and “people fucking suck.”

• Sebastian relates heavily to you, and really loves you. He can't believe he's found someone who relates to him so well, but also has such a kind and genuine soul. He loves you more than life itself and enjoys your company more than anything on this planet.

shane

• Shane is probably the most guarded person in Stardew Valley, and it shows when he meets you. He could care less about you at first, pretty much ignoring your every movement. He doesn't really care that you're mute, he just doesn't care about you period. He's not really there yet, mentally.

• However, things change when you offer him a beer. He's confused by your kindness, and you can't really explain yourself because he doesn't understand sign. His curiosity is piqued. So, he asks Marnie if she knows any sign, and she refers him to Jodi, who eventually refers him to Sam. He hates the idea of having to work with Sam, but he can't help himself. He was too curious.

• After picking up a bit, he ends up offering you a beer in solidarity. He then thinks for a moment before showing the sign for beer. Your excitement warms his rather cold heart ... that's new. He just communicates by speaking, but he can read sign, so that seems like enough in his eyes.

• He finds it easy to talk to you, as you're such an interesting and perseverant person. It inspires him to begin working on himself. He pushes himself to work hard ... for you. Huh. Then, as if the sky was falling around him, he realized he was falling for you. He began pushing you away, until you basically cornered him at the bar. You took him to a private room where he rambled on about how perfect you were and how he was just going to ruin you. You eventually just signed “love ?” He looked like a scared child and just nodded. He signed “I love you” with shaking hands. But of course, so did you.

• His assholery is on full display when someone tries to come at you. He doesn't do it as eloquently or kind as some others, he just curses and insults until they shut their trap. They have no room to talk in his eyes.

• Despite his cold nature, Shane really does love you. He has no problems with your nature and sees it as a contrast to his own nature. He finds that enamoring and beautiful, unlike himself. He's working on himself, for you.

[lucky-clover-gazette]

kings rising highlights & annotations

chapter 7

edit: there is much better analysis in this follow-up post, although it does build on the stuff i wrote here

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

There were very few problems, the public killings having been good for the soldiers’ morale.

so where are the people like me in this world who would like pass out witnessing that. just too desensitized to care?

The Veretian herald was named Hendric and he had very strong arms, because banners were heavy.

Damen and Laurent were to ride alongside one another. Neither one of them had the better horse.

THEIR HORSES!! BACK TOGETHER DESPITE ALL ODDS!! because they’re definitely the same ones that fell in love during prince's gambit shut up

Damen was taller, but nothing could be done about that, Hendric had said with an impenetrable expression. Hendric, Damen was learning, had something in common with Laurent, in that it was never a simple matter to tell when he was joking.

give laurent a comedically large hammer and he’ll find a way

‘I hope the injured boy was returned to you safely.’ ‘Thank you, he returned with Paschal,’ said Laurent. For a salve? Damen opened his mouth to say, and didn’t.

throwback <3 but kings can’t have inside jokes :(

In the next moment, the horns rang out, triumphant and lonely at the same time, the pure sound absorbed by the sky and the wide open landscape around them.

“triumphant and lonely” nice detail

He remembered exactly how it had looked, and that was why he didn’t recognise it at first: the forest of broken spears was gone, and there were no gouged ruts in the earth, no men face down in the churned mud. Marlas was now a tumble of grass and wildflowers in the blowy, sweet summer weather, shifting back and forth in the gentle air. Here and there an insect droned, a drowsy sound. A dragonfly dipped and darted.

i like this :) we don’t get a lot of love for nature in this series, so i’ll take what i get. especially nice when nature represents healing and the passage of time.

Lining the hall were two dozen slaves.

oh this is going to be a headache. but it’s a headache worth having, because i’ve approached these annotations so far with integrity and fairness, and i refuse to treat this subject any differently. i don’t want to just ignore the things that are more difficult or less fun to unpack in order to get to the fun shipping stuff, i want to analyze them to the best of my ability and feel as comfortable as i possibly can moving forward.

so let’s set up some context:

1) damen has come a long way from his stance on slavery in book 1. he is actively refusing to partake in this expected custom, and finds the institution disturbing and triggering. he has developed a new appreciation for sex with truly consenting (not trained) partners, aka laurent, and can’t really go back. still, his reasons for refraining here are almost entirely based on his evolving sense of morality, not really relating to his relationship with laurent at all. for more on that moral evolution, see my analysis in chapter 4. further proof of this Really Mattering to damen is the fact that by not taking slaves, he is losing points with his own people. another great hint of his development as a king, making his own authoritative decisions rather than upholding tradition.

2) laurent does not like slavery. he does not think it is morally correct, and has made many jabs at damen throughout the series for disagreeing. he is disturbed by idea of people who have been groomed into relinquishing their own free will. if put in the situation of damen in book 1, laurent would not have been nearly as compliant or allowing—honestly, he probably would have tried to kill his master, and failing that, kill himself.

HOWEVER. vere does not do slavery. slavery had never been a relevant issue to laurent, at least until he was gifted a slave of his own and was made to deal with them in negotiations with patras. slavery is a thing other countries do, to laurent, and his current objective is make nice with a country that keeps slaves. therefore, he knows that his only real option is to keep the appearance of partaking in the custom, even if damen can get away with refusal. and i think we can safely assume that in laurent’s vere, there will be no slavery, even if he’s taking up the appearance of a slave owner now. additionally, i think we can also assume that there will be reform of the country’s pet system, which is an issue much more relevant to laurent’s lived experience.

if the stuff with laurent and slaves here was simply performative and un-indulgent, i wouldn’t need to be writing anything more here. but it is, as it is, one of the few things in the series that makes me feel very conflicted (see also: the garden scene in book 1). because while it’s true that laurent doesn’t actually use isander as a sex slave, and does have this kind of passive disdain for slavery, he does use isander in another way. he uses isander, a non-consenting brainwashed slave, as a way to make damen, who has never actually been a slave, jealous. this is an abuse of power that directly conflicts with laurent’s stated and assumed values regarding free will and individual personhood. we’ve seen things like this before, in arles, but laurent had known that damen was a prince and not a slave the entire time. but isander is a victim of this system—even if isander himself doesn’t know that, laurent damn well does. and laurent historically is someone who advocates for victims. so the fact that his morals here are being set aside in favor of a petty gesture against damen, is… disappointing. everything i said in chapter 3/4 about laurent’s mean girl era still stands: he knows he’s being shitty, and he’s doing it because he doesn’t want to be vulnerable and insecure. better to be a villain than a victim, etc. but laurent being a villain to damen, who laurent knows is perfectly capable of defending himself, is distinctly different from laurent parading out isander the slave just to hurt damen’s feelings.

it’s wrong for the obvious moral reasons, which laurent perfectly understands in the abstract. but it’s not a hill he’s going to die on here, and that’s not just because of the political advantage. this is 100% about personal shit with damen too. and sorry laurent, but slavery does not stop being wrong when it’s useful in creating drama with your ex. in fact, indulging in it for that reason specifically trivializes all of the legitimate problems with the practice. it makes laurent a hypocrite and it crosses a line, in terms of his mean girl schtick. i just want to make that clear—that there is very much a difference between laurent just being kinda cunty to damen in general, and specifically using a slave as tool in that cuntiness.

laurent is, and always has been, a morally complex and often hypocritical character. he has done things that have made me feel uncomfortable to read, like the way he treats damen in the garden scene. and that’s okay, and it doesn’t make him a bad character, or even a bad person. and to be fair, he isn’t doing any practical harm here—if he hadn’t chosen isander to kinda just vaguely flirt with in public and then leave alone in private, someone else probably would have done far worse. and that is an easy cop-out, and it’s not wrong. but still.

the problem isn’t with laurent's actions here, necessarily, but the principle. which is usually what laurent himself cares about the most, as he often values the ends above the means. politics aside, i think that laurent would readily admit post-mean girl era that the ends of making damen jealous did not, and should not, justify the means of using another human being who does not possess free will. maybe he even does that in the text, eventually, and i’ve forgotten.

(also, let’s not forget that isander may have been trained to not have his own feelings, but definitely still has them, because he’s a human being. and it probably makes him feel pretty bad to be chosen and then ignored by laurent. not that it should, because the entire thing is super fucked up, but it’s what he’s been groomed to believe. like, i did just want to throw that in somewhere, even though it’s obviously predicated on brainwashing and a lack of free will. it’s still what he’s feeling, and his feelings matter. just as much as damen’s or laurent’s.)

basically: laurent is failing to be honorable in his usage of isander, even if he’s not using isander as a sex slave as intended. his abstract values about the wrongness of slavery take a back seat to the political and interpersonal advantage of not only passively partaking in the custom, but actively using it to make damen jealous. even if laurent needs to pretend to take a slave to be politically accepted, he does not need to do All That. and honestly, with laurent’s ability to convince and command a crowd, i think we all know deep down that if he didn’t at least want to do this at least a little bit, just to piss damen off, he would find a way out of it. and that is a reality of laurent’s characterization here that i have to deal with, similar to his actions in the garden scene.

and then there’s the other thing that laurent's "performance" with isander has in common with the garden scene:

it’s hot. it’s wrong, and hypocritical, and could have been done in a way that would better suit my personal tastes, but yes, it’s hot. and on top of that, it’s also VERY funny. laurent’s performance, damen’s reactions, and isander’s obliviousness are all very, very funny. and i do want to be able to enjoy them for the petty gestures they are, and joke about them, without constantly having to throw in a “but also this is bad.” so doing this initial disclaimer feels like a happy medium to me, where i’m not ignoring the complexity of the situation entirely, but i’m also conceding that it’s not necessarily meant to be taken seriously, and it’s ultimately written for the reader to enjoy. like, don’t get me wrong, most of the slavery stuff in this series has NOT been written for the reader’s enjoyment—the values here are very clear, especially in damen’s arc—but there are still some indulgent moments. and it is fiction. and these characters aren’t perfect, nor did they create the culture of the kingdoms that they’re about to rule. and they do ultimately change the things that they, and we the reader, know are wrong.

but just like with the garden scene, i can’t quite get myself to write “so it’s totally fine to just have fun with the whole slavery thing” as a conclusion. and honestly, i feel pretty okay about that hesitancy. when i make jokes about this subject in this specific context (laurent and isander), i don’t want it to be forgotten that the subject itself (slavery) is still entirely serious. so instead, i’ll say:

this is fun because manipulative petty lamen mind games are fun. this is hot because manipulative petty lamen mind games are hot. this is somewhat intended as a backhanded insult and display of moral superiority—laurent showing damen how awful he and his culture appear to non-slave owners—but that moral superiority ultimately falls short due to laurent’s hypocritical use of a slave to make damen jealous. all of those separate pieces of analysis are true to the overall experience of reading and interpreting these scenes. it’s a mixed bag, we know it’s a mixed bag, laurent knows it’s a mixed bag, and damen knows it’s a mixed bag. the only relevant person who doesn’t know it’s a mixed bag is isander, because he’s a slave and isn’t allowed to think for himself, and that fucking sucks.

Isander was olive-skinned and lithe as a fawn, with dark hair and eyes: Akielon colouring. He shared that with Nikandros; with Damen.

yeah i’m sure that’s just a coincidence

Male, either in deference to Veretian customs, or to suit Laurent’s assumed preferences.

akielon slave owners, trying to assess laurent’s preferences:

(can you tell my heart still isn’t fully in the humor here…)

Nikandros would never offer royalty anything less than a slave’s First Night.

god, the first night thing is fucked up. in general, i love the lack of like… uh… traditionally conservative (read: christian) attitudes about sex in capri, so the few similarities especially give me the ick. i haven’t read or annotated the erasmus short story yet, but i know it’s going to piss me off too. basically, the closer we get to the handmaid’s tale, the more i want to read complicit characters dying horrifically on the page. nikandros and the other akielons are skirting by for now with the plausible deniability they have re: fully understanding how slaves are trained, but they’re on thin fucking ice.

also, lighter side question, what’s the recommended reading order for the short stories?

sweet grace of a palace slave

gag

‘I like that one,’ said Laurent.

>:(

‘Slaves are trained in the arts of pleasure, but they do not lie with another until their First Night,’ Kolnas said. ‘Here we use the same strict, classical training that is used in the royal palace. Skills are learned through instruction, and practised with indirect methods. The slave remains wholly untouched, kept pure for the first use of the Exalted.’

imagine if real-life cultural customs were built around grooming a certain group of people to be sexually submissive and modest as a thinly-veiled way to control their sexuality and ensure that they are attached to dominant societal figures from a young age without the education or free will to consider themselves actual human beings, so they can unquestioningly spend their entire lives as sex machines and domestic servants defined entirely by their responsibility to the family, and then they die and their headstone identifies them by their status as a possession of their dominant partner. wouldn’t that be fucked up

‘I never did learn how to command a bed slave,’ said Laurent. ‘Teach me.’

guys i wish i could find this hot or funny but now i’m just mad about disturbing stuff in real life that i can’t analyze out of existence. i’m taking a break and eating a chocolate strawberry greek yogurt popsicle and then i’ll try to refocus on the funny toxic gay people

‘They cannot speak Veretian, Your Highness,’ Kolnas explained. ‘In the Akielon language, using the plain form of address is appropriate. To command any act of service is to honour a slave. The more personal the service, the greater the honour.’ ‘Really? Come here,’ said Laurent.

laurent go sit in the corner.

Laurent extended the tip of his boot. ‘Kiss it,’ he said. His eyes were on Damen.

god this is so good. i hate it so much.

to be fair, there is no way to do this that would be more effective than laurent using a slave. because, y’know, damen was his “slave.” it wouldn’t hit the same with some random non-slave guy. laurent wants to fuck with damen’s head, and part of that is making him miss something he most certainly should not be missing. laurent is also fucking with my head, because this gesture is so conflictingly wrong and compelling, a word which in this case means "something i’m embarrassed/ashamed to say that i find hot."

‘Good boy,’ said Laurent, reaching down to pet Isander’s dark curls, while Isander’s eyes closed and he flushed over.

(easy joke to make, but we’re all probably thinking it) damen:

(also, this being the only “good boy” in the entire series is just diabolical. but i get why it is, because i think it might not be the only one—and if it isn’t the only one, that means the regent says it at some point, and that’s exactly why it’s never used in a lamen sex scene.)

Kolnas preened, pleased that his selection was appreciated. Damen could see that the fort’s household around them was also pleased, having gone to great lengths to make Laurent feel welcome. They had considered with intense thoughtfulness Veretian culture and Veretian practices.

i sense some slight snarkiness here—not even from damen, but from the narrative itself. there’s palpable irony in the “great lengths” and “thoughtfulness” of akielions considering veretian culture while presenting laurent with slaves, all while veretian culture doesn’t have slavery.

It was pointless. There were two dozen slaves here, while the number of times Laurent had had sex in his life could probably be counted on one hand. Laurent was just going to be dragging twenty-four young men back to his rooms to sit around doing nothing. They wouldn’t even be able to unlace Veretian clothing.

according to damen:

this is stupid.

laurent is, in all ways but physical, a loser virgin.

he’s going to set out board games for those sex slaves. he’s going to throw them a pizza party. he’s going to answer emails the entire time.

they don’t even know how to unlace laurent’s clothing like i do.

this is stupid.

‘Can he also serve me in the baths?’ said Laurent.

CUNT.

‘And at the feast for the bannermen this evening when they give their pledge, if that pleases you, Your Highness,’ said Kolnas. ‘It pleases me,’ said Laurent.

damen is about to throw up on the floor

Cloth wound around his waist and over his shoulder, the sort of ceremonial Akielon garb that you could unreel from a person by taking hold of one end and pulling while they rotated.

looney toons-ass imagery

He could feel their discomfort, their need to debase themselves; this sort of proximity to royalty permitted only the extreme submissiveness of slaves.

thank you damen for being the only normal person here. you've come a long way.

“discomfort, their need to debase themselves” is something book 1 damen would have found adorable and charming. he definitely wouldn’t have worded it like this, back then.

“this sort of proximity to royalty permitted only the extreme submissiveness of slaves” building on the damen vs. kingship theme, he thinks he can’t have real love or intimacy or vulnerability if he’s a king. he can’t truly be paired with an equal, because he needs to be exalted.

He had sent away the slaves.

damen you’re the only one i’m not at mad at in this chapter. actually i liked the funny banner guy, we’re chill too. and isander is just trying his best

Laurent, he knew, was rooming in the adjoining suite, separated from him by a single wall. Damen was in the King’s chambers, which any lord who built a fort installed, in the hope the King would stop there. But even the former lord of Marlas’s optimism had not stretched to the idea that the heads of two royal families would visit simultaneously. To preserve their arrangements of scrupulous equality, Laurent was in the Queen’s chambers, beyond that wall.

i’m getting so much whiplash from this chapter like yeah this is funny and cute but also is the slavery stuff just normal to people like i’m aware the series started from a specific subculture and kink and body of literary work, so i guess i’m the weird one and the outsider here for being so distracted??

Isander was probably tending him, gamely doing his best with the laces. He would have to unhook the lacings on the back of the neck of Laurent’s riding leathers before drawing them through their eyelets. Or Laurent had taken Isander into the baths, to be undressed by him there. Isander would be flushed with pride at being chosen for the task. Attend me. Damen felt his hands curl into fists.

i don’t think i need to point out in a note, every single time, that damen being jealous of isander is funny and his possessiveness of laurent is hot. but i will still highlight the passages where it happens.

He turned his mind to political matters.

good call buddy, you and i are going to get through this chapter together

Men and women reclined on couches

(said apprehensively, given the overall themes of this chapter) ...women?

Makedon leaned, selecting a slice of peeled orange. Pallas, the handsome officer-champion, reclined with the easy posture that spoke to his aristocratic blood. Straton had hitched his skirts up and drawn his legs onto the couch, crossing them at the ankles. Everyone whom rank or office entitled to be here was assembled, and with every northerner of standing gathered to give their pledge, the hall was packed full. The Veretians present were mostly vertical, standing awkwardly in small groups, one or two perched gingerly on the edge of a seat.

There was no trumpet flourish or herald’s announcement, as there would have been in Vere.

okay i didn’t realize there was a trumpet flourish in vere. that is very funny in retrospect. a trumpet is not the instrument i’d choose to announce laurent’s arrival. in arles especially, i personally think that a halloween sfx cd would have been much more appropriate

Laurent didn’t rise. He wasn’t required to. He just watched from his reclining couch, as the hall prostrated itself. He had cultivated an elegant sprawl, with his arm draped over his couch back, and his leg drawn up, revealing the arc of an exquisitely clad thigh. His fingers dangled. Silk rucked around his knee.

laurent lean #14. kings leaning.

Isander was prostrated, an inch from Laurent’s casually draped fingertips, his lithe body bare. He wore a brief garment like a Vaskian man’s cloth. His collar fit him like a second skin. Laurent sat relaxed, every line of his body arranged tastefully against the couch. Damen made himself stroll forward through the silence. Their twin couches were next to each other. ‘Brother,’ Laurent said, pleasantly.

no comment

The eyes of everyone in the hall were on him. He felt their gazes, their underfed curiosity. He heard the murmurs—it really is him, Damianos, alive and here—accompanied by the brazen looks, looking at him, looking at the gold cuff on his wrist, looking at Laurent in his Veretian clothes like an exotic ornament—so that is the Veretian Prince. And beneath that the speculation that was never spoken aloud.

at least one akielon politics rpf truther is losing their mind rn. we have gaylor, this world has gaymianos

Laurent was scrupulously correct in the face of it, his behaviour immaculate, even his use of the slave was an act of unimpeachable etiquette. In Akielos it pleased the host for a guest to make use of his hospitality. And it pleased the Akielon people for their royal family to take slaves, a sign of virility and power, and a cause of great pride.

narrows my eyes

Barieus stepped forward. ‘I want assurances that Vere does not hold undue influence over Akielos.’ Undue influence. ‘Speak plainly.’ ‘They say the Prince of Vere is your lover.’

found the gaymianos truther

‘Who we take to our bed is not your concern.’

well i mean if you’re using the royal ��we” to represent the kingdom, then yeah… it kinda is?

‘Shall I tell them what really happened between us? They want to know,’ Laurent said. Laurent began to unlace the cuff of his sleeve, drawing the ties through the eyelets, then opening the fabric to expose the fine underside of his wrist—and then the unmistakable gold of the slave cuff.

Laurent leaned his wrist elegantly on the curved arm of the couch, the open sleeve reminiscent of a delicate open shirt collar, its laces trailing. ‘Do I have the question clear?’ said Laurent, speaking in Akielon. ‘You are asking if I lay with the man who killed my own brother?’ Laurent wore the slave cuff with utter disregard. He had no owner, the aristocratic arrogance of his posture said that. Laurent had always possessed an essential quality of the untouchable. He cultivated a faultless grace on the reclining couch, his chiselled profile and marble-chip eyes those of a statue. The idea that he would let anyone fuck him was impossible.

and damen is so into it. love love love the contrast with the description of slaves in this chapter. damen doesn’t want them, he wants laurent. he sees laurent as a complete and compelling person. there is honor in laurent’s performative submission—wearing the cuff—because damen respects laurent’s personhood. but he’s no longer able to see the submission of slaves as honorable, because he knows they’re fucking slaves who have been robbed of their personhood entirely.

Barieus said, ‘A man would have to be ice-cold to sleep with his brother’s killer.’ ‘Then you have your answer,’ said Laurent. There was a silence, in which Laurent’s gaze held that of Barieus. ‘Yes, Exalted.’ Barieus bowed his head, and unconsciously used the Akielon Exalted, rather than the Veretian titles Highness or Majesty.

a vine boom echoed through the court

‘Well, Barieus?’ said Damen. Barieus knelt two steps before the dais. ‘I will pledge. I see that the Prince of Vere stands with you. It’s right that we swear to you here, on the site of your greatest victory.’

“he is simply too cunty for us to deny his authority.”

Slaves brought the food. Squires served Damen, since he had made his preferences clear. It was an awkward arrangement that displeased everyone in the hall.

YES DAMEN!

Isander was utterly in love with his master. He strove continuously to do well, selecting each delicacy for Laurent to sample, bringing him only the best, in small, shallow dishes, refreshing the water bowl for Laurent to clean his fingers. He did it all with perfect form, discreetly attentive, and never drawing attention to himself. His eyelashes drew attention to themselves. Damen made himself look elsewhere.

but that’s not real love, and damen knows it. laurent knows it too. and damen did it way better in nesson-elroy

Laurent said, ‘Play The Fall of Inachtos,’ and a murmur of approval passed over the hall. Kolnas, the Keeper of Slaves, congratulated Laurent on his knowledge of Akielon epics. ‘It’s one of your favourites, isn’t it?’ said Laurent, transferring his gaze to Damen.

diabolical. need this energy for the lamen divorce playlists (they each have their own)

He had always liked the depiction of Akielons cutting down their enemies, as Nisos rode out to kill Inachtos, and take his walled city. He didn’t want to hear it now.

yayyy character development

It was Loyse and not Guion that Jord was approaching. She gave him a cursory look. ‘Yes?’ There was an awkward pause. ‘I just wanted to say . . . that I’m sorry for your loss. Your son was a good fighter.’ ‘Thank you, soldier.’ She gave him the token attention a lady might give to any servant, and turned back to her conversation with her husband.

loyse hiiiiiii loyse (said with appropriate sadness for her current state of grief)

Jord gazed at him for a long moment, then indicated Laurent with his chin. ‘I’m glad you two are friends,’ said Jord.

jord always knows exactly when to show up and make ill-timed commentary on damen and laurent's relationship

‘I thought when he found out about you, he’d swear revenge,’ said Jord. ‘He knew all along,’ said Damen. ‘It’s good that you could trust each other,’ said Jord. And then: ‘I think before you came, he didn’t really trust anyone.’ Damen said, ‘He didn’t.’

also isn’t it like SUPER awkward for jord to be around guion and loyse right now

Isander was bringing Laurent a sprig of grapes in a small dish. Laurent said something approving, and gestured for Isander to join him on the reclining couch. Isander glowed, shyly besotted. As Damen watched, Isander picked a single grape from the sprig, and lifted it to Laurent’s lips. Laurent leaned in. He twined a finger around a curl of Isander’s hair and allowed himself to be fed, grape by grape, a prince with a new favourite.

damen is about to start scratching the walls like a cat confronted with a closed door

He lifted the wine blindly. The cup was empty. Straton wasn’t the only Akielon departing with a slave; men and women throughout the hall were availing themselves. The wine, and the slaves enacting the battle were breaking down inhibitions. Akielon voices grew loud, emboldened by wine.

between the heavy drinking and sex practices, the akielon court actually sounds like my living hell. and we haven’t even gotten to the naked sports chapter yet

Laurent leaned in further to murmur something intimately into Isander’s ear, and then, as the recitation reached its climax, the clash of swords like the hammering in his chest, Damen saw Laurent tap Isander’s shoulder, and rise. I’d wager you never thought a prince could be jealous of a slave. At this moment I’d trade places with you in a heartbeat. Torveld’s words. He said, ‘Excuse me.’

The entire court around him rose as he pushed up from his couch-throne.

“couch-throne”

Trying to follow Laurent out, he got tangled in ceremony, the hall a stifling press of bodies and noise, and, as a blond head disappeared towards the doorway, he was stopped by party after party blocking his path.

okay i’m so curious what he’s meaning to do when he catches up to laurent. yell at him? yell at isander? throw up?

He ought to have brought a slave of his own, then the crowd would have melted away, understanding: the King wished privacy.

i am begging the protagonists of this book to stop using human people as objects. again maybe that’s just a me problem, this isn’t my usual genre and the akielon slavery system clearly doesn’t align with my kink sensibilities, but COME ON

The corridor was empty when he strode out into it. His heart was pounding. He turned the first corner into a section of the passage, half expecting to catch Laurent’s retreating figure. Instead, he saw a stark, empty arch with all its Veretian lattice stripped away. Under the arch was Isander, standing with his fawn eyes, looking confused and abandoned. His confusion was such that for a moment he just stared at Damen with wide eyes before he seemed to understand what was happening, and folded to the floor, forehead to the stone. Damen said, ‘Where is he?’ Isander was well trained, even if nothing was happening as he had expected tonight; and even if, rather mortifyingly, he was being asked to report this fact to his King. ‘His Highness of Vere has gone for a ride.’

well at least if “going on a ride” is laurent code for “feeling morally and emotionally troubled,” that’s… less disappointing, i guess.

also, i do realize that this is the place where laurent’s brother was killed, currently taken over by the nation that orchestrated and benefitted from his death. so there’s probably a twisted vindication in learning exactly how fucked up their culture is (asking about the first night, etc), and getting whatever kind of enjoyment out of the whole situation he can (pissing off damen). but there still had to be a crash, and as soon as laurent was excused from his duties he dipped to deal with it alone.

‘At the stables a handler might know his destination. This slave can inquire.’

i caaaaaan’t stand the way they’re denied use of personal pronouns

Closer; the approach was difficult because it was sharp with memory. Here was the place where their left flank had fallen. Here was the place where he had ordered men to attack the lines that would not fall, the starburst banner that did not falter. Here was the place where he had killed the last of the Prince’s Guard, and come face to face with Auguste. He dismounted from his horse, looping its reins over the cracked stone column of an overgrown pillar. The landscape was old, and the pieces of stone were old; and he remembered this place, remembered the torn soil and the desperation of the fight. Clearing a last jut of stone, he saw the curve of a shoulder in the moonlight, the white of a loose shirt, his outer garments stripped, all wrists and exposed throat. Laurent was sitting on a stone outcrop. His jacket was discarded uncharacteristically. He was sitting on it.

this is a beautifully set scene.

A stone slid under his heel. Laurent turned. For a moment, Laurent looked at him wide-eyed, young, and then the look in his eyes changed, as though the universe had fulfilled an ineluctable promise. ‘Oh,’ he said, ‘perfect.’

a moment of surprise and vulnerability, and then practiced cool again. onto Some More Bullshit, i guess

this isn’t the chapter to really tackle this, but i will eventually write a long essay about how laurent goes through his own mini character growth arc, completely off the page, during the lamen divorce era. it’s just that damen has custody of the reader, so we don’t get to see it—only hints, like this moment here. laurent must have had a lot on his mind, too, ever since their last heated conversation. i have some ideas about what that “a lot” might be, but again, i don’t think i’ve gotten quite enough from laurent yet to really start forming a conclusion.

Damen said, ‘I thought you might want—’ ‘Want?’ ‘A friend,’ said Damen. He used Jord’s word. His chest felt tight. ‘If you’d prefer me to leave, I will.’ ‘Why cavil?’ said Laurent. ‘Let’s fuck.’

ON YOUR BROTHER’S FIGURATIVE GRAVE WITH HIS MURDERER????

‘That isn’t what I meant.’ ‘It might not be what you meant, but it’s what you want.’ Laurent said, ‘You want to fuck me.’ Anyone else would have been drunk. Laurent was dangerously sober.

yeah, no, he’s definitely being going through Some Shit on his own. lots of self-loathing, especially due to the fact that he can’t hate damen as much as he knows he should. yearning, more self-loathing because of that yearning. companionship withdrawals, a return to isolation. a revived sense of grief for his brother, and nicaise, and damen (not damianos) and even his relationship with his uncle, who he hadn’t thought would be capable of trying to kill him. hating himself and blaming himself and regretting things he’s done to push people away. just an all-around bad time, but a necessary time of reflection that he needs to experience on his own. damen can’t just swoop in and fix laurent, laurent has to decide that he’s worth saving first. he’s not there yet, clearly, assuming that damen only wants him as a sexual object. whiiiiich was probably why he went so hard on the eroticism with isander easlier, it was an easy victory to get damen hot and bothered. a game he could win, among the many other games he knows he’s losing—especially the ones against himself.

i’ll put together something more coherent before the divorce era ends. tbh, i kinda think this scene should have been a separate chapter, because there is some pretty massive whiplash here. although maybe not, maybe the buildup of emotional and sexual tension was the point. yeah, it was. the slavery stuff just made it more frustrating to read. never mind.

‘You’ve been thinking about it since Ravenel. Since Nesson.’ He knew this mood. He should have expected it. He made himself say the words. ‘I came because I thought you might want to talk.’ ‘Not particularly.’

it almost sounds like laurent played himself, for the millionth time, by getting himself worked up with isander when he just really wanted damen

He said, ‘About your brother.’ ‘I never fucked my brother,’ said Laurent, with a strange edge to the words. ‘That is incest.’ They were standing in the place where his brother had died. With a disorientating sensation Damen realised they weren’t going to talk about that. They were going to talk about this.

"yes, honey..."

‘You’re right,’ said Damen. ‘I’ve been thinking about it since Ravenel. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.’ ‘Why?’ said Laurent. ‘Was I that good?’ ‘No. You fucked like a virgin,’ said Damen,

deserved

‘half the time. The rest of the time—’ ‘Like I knew what to do?’ ‘Like you knew what you were used to.’ He saw the words impact. Laurent swayed, like he’d been dealt a blow. Laurent said, ‘I’m not certain I can take your particular brand of honesty just at the moment.’

oh well this is particularly horrifying with [redacted] context. also i think the quote “i’m not certain i can take your particular brand of honesty just at the moment” says A LOT about how laurent has always viewed damen, for better or for worse. laurent can count on damen to tell him what he needs to hear, not what he wants to hear. so it makes sense that he’s been avoiding damen lately, because laurent is going through his own crisis of personal reflection

Damen said, ‘I don’t prefer sophistication in bed, if you were wondering.’ ‘That’s right,’ said Laurent. ‘You like it simple.’ All the breath left his throat. He stood, stripped, unready for it. Will you use even that against me? he wanted to say, and didn’t. Laurent’s breathing was shallow too, holding his ground.

is “that” just laurent making fun of the way damen is earnest in bed? seems like an overreaction from damen if that's the case, so it’s probably something else i’m missing. maybe laurent is accusing damen of keeping the secret of his identity, even when they fucked, to make things simpler between them? that would support my previous theory that laurent is convinced that damen wouldn’t want him how he really is, as damen really is, with all the complications between them. or it’s a dig about auguste somehow, and i just can’t figure out how it connects.

‘He died well,’ Damen made himself say. ‘He fought better than any man I’ve known. It was a fair fight, and he felt no pain. The end was quick.’

like i said—what laurent needs to hear, not what he wants to hear. even if damen thinks that it’s going to make laurent hate him more, he still has the integrity to say it.

‘You sent your men out to look for me too?’ said Laurent, his mouth twisting. ‘No,’ said Damen, and pushed Laurent hard out of sight, into the shelter of one of the huge, crumbling blocks of stone. In the next second, the troop was on them, at least two hundred men, so that the air was thick with the passage of horses. Damen pressed Laurent firmly into the rock, and held him in place with his body. The riders didn’t slow, even on this uncertain ground in the dark, and any man in their path would be trampled, tumbled, kicked from hoof to hoof. Discovery was a real threat, the rock cool under his palms, the dark shuddering with the pounding of hooves and heavy lethal horseflesh. He could feel Laurent against him, the barely contained tension, adrenalin mixed with his dislike of the proximity, the urge in him to prise himself out and away, stifled by necessity.

throwback <3 i think this is very intentionally placed in this conversation, as a reminder that they are the same people they were in prince’s gambit

‘I know you’re not cold,’ said Damen. ‘You weren’t cold when you ordered me tied to the post. You weren’t cold when you pushed me down on your bed.’

more true things laurent does not want to hear right now! also i like the use of warmth, as the opposite of cold, to signify both vengeful rage and romantic/sexual passion. two sides of the same coin

‘A fair fight?’ said Laurent, turning back to him. ‘No fight’s ever fair. Someone’s always stronger.’

rewinding to their previous argument. aren’t they both tired? i’m tired.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

on the subject of Frank, Frank & Julie, and Franklydear 

I used to think that Frank will probably be one of the more skeptical puppets, and prone to being one of the first to see that not all is as it seems. And I think the majority of us think/thought this! 

But thanks to Riv i have entirely changed my tune. I think Frank will actively be avoiding the truth & clinging to the illusion. Here’s why!

Frank is portrayed as the most “rigid” neighbor - hell, it’s even part of his design! He likes routine, rules, for things to be ‘just so’ in his eyes. He doesn’t seem to like it when things stray from how they’re supposed to be. Everything has a time and a place. 

(and this might be mildly insane but blame Riv not me bc they said it, but in Just So Frank says “i like it best when red goes in front of the rest”, and if red is Wally… dot dot dot…) 

Then there’s how Frank will very likely be trying extremely hard to be something he’s not. And this is part of his design, too - he’s the only one in the cast without a natural blush. Yes, we’ve seen art where he can blush, but that’s in specific situations. In the bio images Frank is the only one without that little extra bit of color to his cheeks - he has two huge red splotches on him instead. Fake blush. Big and bright and impossible to ignore. 

And I’m gonna be diving a bit into Franklydear & Frank’s relationship with Julie because it’s important to this. 

I have also changed my tune on Franklydear - slightly. Welcome Home seems to be an example of nonlinear storytelling, as we’ve been getting bits and pieces from all over the place. The Live Interview from the early days, WHRP & Wally’s secret vinyl audios from “now”, the bug audios from an indeterminate time… so while I do think Franklydear is “already happening” within the main meat of the “past”, we will likely also get a chance to see before and after. And I do think there will be an after.

But I’m getting ahead of myself! Why do I think we’re going to see an established Franklydear? I’m going to be honest. A kofi post that I accidentally saw when a friend was sharing their screen with me and didn’t notice until it was too late </3 I should have looked away! But I didn’t, and that’s on me! I won’t say what I saw (it would be a theory anyways, nothing explicit or concrete in the evidence!) but it immediately convinced me that Frank & Eddie are in a secret relationship. I want to say more very badly, but if i’m proven right in tonight’s stream then I will be sharing Why I’m right. 

More reasoning that is obvious with this context - the whole “Mr. Dear / Frank- i mean Mr. Frankly!” thing might be part of this fabricated distance. I would completely believe you if you told me that Frank had them both refer to each other professionally to keep up the facade that they’re nothing but neighbors, nothing going on here nosiree. They definitely don’t meet in the woods to be romantic! That added with how unusually playful Frank is with Eddie in 8-14 is interesting… though I can also believe that those audios are from “before” their relationship, given that Frank seems to be dropping a hint with the whole “ You don’t need to be that familiar with them in order to get to know them better!” line. I don’t know - there are a bunch of contradictions that could be them acting, could be differences in the timeline, who’s to say yet! 

Anyway, so Franklydear is likely in a secret relationship, but I think Frank is going to get scared, call it off, and try to force a relationship with Julie. As in lying to her and everyone that he has feelings for her, and fulfilling their “destiny” in becoming a couple. I think Frank is where a lot of the internalized homophobia is going to come in.

In most of the Franklydear art we’ve seen from Clown, Frank seems to be very nervous and flustered around Eddie while Eddie seems to be more calm and forward. Frank has already proven to have a bit of a nervous disposition - he’s certainly high strung. That combined with his rigidity, the airs he puts on, and just… everything about him really, I don’t think he’ll be able to handle the pressure. 

(side note: the way that Clown said that he wishes they hadn’t let everyone know about Franklydear, it’s ok because it’s “not a major spoiler” has been fucking me up a little. Wym it’s not a Major spoiler? It’s so funny… we’ve all been like “Franklydear will be Thee relationship and a big thing-” and then it’s Not. lmao) 

Then there’s the song Clown associates with Franklydear, “Esperar pra ver”. @/Theneighborhoodwatch gave a translation/interpretation of the lyrics - cannot for the life of me find the og ask/post to link, but (if I’m remembering correctly) it was essentially said that the song is about love that doesn’t last / lost love. My friend Akemi (@/akemima <3) provided an alternate interpretation - to quote:

“...to me, it speaks about how they’re both Unable to speak up about their love? and the “wait and see” part is most likely them waiting for the other to make a first step or like. something Hopeful yknow?”

As both a tragedy enjoyer and a happy-end enjoyer, I wouldn’t mind either interpretation being accurate, personally! So Akemi has given us a sprinkle of hope for Franklydear! I think that both interpretations have merit, and hey, they can coexist. We might have them together, then Frank getting scared and calling it off, and then a “third arc” of them wanting to be back together but unable to (yet). Who’s to say! 

ON TO THE JULIE PORTION.

For a while I thought that Julie might be the one to pursue a relationship with Frank - both because of the subconscious influence of her “Role” & that she’s bi while Frank is gay. On surface level she would be the most likely of the two to get the wrong/mixed signals and Go For It.

However. Nothing about this project is surface level. 

I’ve already mentioned that I think Frank is going to try very hard to be something he isn’t. And this is backed by how his relationship with Julie is portrayed (another thank you to Riv for pointing a lot of this out & smacking some sense into me <3) 

Frank is all about rules and matching. Julie is all about improv and independence. Riv pointed out that in “Just So” the audio distorts when Frank is changing bowties and Julie asks if it “really matters”. They also pointed out that, apparently in the Halloween outfit references, Frank’s notes indicate that he’s matching with Julie - but Julie doesn’t have any reciprocating notes. It implies that she was doing her own thing and Frank adjusted himself accordingly. Julie goes along with Frank sometimes, but it seems that it’s usually Frank scrambling to go along with Julie. She’s been described as independent and stubborn. Frank is a bit more of a conforming pushover (no offense Frankie, love ya to bits <3). 

Frank is the straightman to Julie’s… I can’t reference the bios anymore but you know! He might be her straightman in more ways than just “he takes things seriously.” 

And really. Frank likes routine, he likes things to be consistent. He’s been with Julie as her best friend / “partner” for so long that I’m not sure if he can easily break away from that - I think a change as big as getting romantically involved with Eddie would terrify him. It might be thrilling for a moment, but then the fear will set in. 

I thought Julie would be the one clinging to Frank, but it’s the other way around isn’t it? 

Frank gets scared & then leads Julie on because he’s trying to act “normal”, the way that’s expected of him. And it fits. One of WH’s themes is the fear of being shunned for / perceived as different by others. Once they know what you are, will they treat you the same? 

And I don’t think Julie would be entirely opposed, either. I wouldn’t blame her for developing a crush on Frank. I mean, it might turn out that she’s “just going along with it” because she feels the same pressure and fear, but hm… I’m not convinced of that given what we know about her character. But if Julie has a little crush on Frank, I wouldn’t be surprised if when he forces himself to like her & initiates a relationship, she either realizes that it really was just a crush, or she’ll pick up on how Frank doesn’t actually have feelings & act accordingly. This option has more merit in my eyes. I think it would also reflect on the “love” theme of her house - I’ve speculated since pretty much day one that she’ll have an arc around realizing that she doesn’t need a relationship or even really want one at present, going against what Playfellow likely wanted from her. 

(and then I start thinking about the whole livestream trivia thing of Julie maybe falling down a hole or into some abyss… and the concept art of her shoes where she’s standing at the edge of a dark abyss… does she fall, does she jump, or is she pushed? If she winds up being pushed, who does it? Barnaby (milk theory babey!) or perhaps she’ll get in a fight with Frank and in the heat of the moment he accidentally causes her to fall, either by pushing or making her lose awareness of her surroundings (backing off of the edge?). I’m aware that this paragraph is a stretch all around! Don’t take it too seriously! A pinch of salt, people!)

There’s not much else to be said so, in conclusion:

Welcome Home’s storytelling is likely on a nonlinear timeline, Franklydear is established but won’t last, and Frank/Julie is probably going to become a temporary thing

[lavenderarts]

Revamp: Monthly Subs and Reward Art!

Hi everyone! After a long hiatus on this due to inconsistent health, I'm back and feeling better than ever, and I'd like to re-institute my monthly subscription service for art rewards. These will be active on my Ko-fi starting on August 1st! Read on to hear about the changes from my old system and details of what you'll get for subscribing, but if you don't care about any of that and just want to see the rewards page, here it is:

Please share this and consider tossing a couple bucks a month my way to help me support myself and my dog! Details below the cut!

So last time I was offering art rewards, it gradually became unsustainable for a number of reasons, chief among them the fact that I was basically offering severely discounted full commissions of all styles, and it was exhausting to fulfill in addition to regular commission work. I just couldn't keep up and got overwhelmed. So to help prevent that this time around, here are the changes I'm implementing:

I'll have a single reward type: single character busts! These are easy to crank out in an hour or less, so I can keep up with demand better. I'll reserve the right to decide between lined/lineless flats and papercrafts as I see fit to keep them interesting and fun for me, but if it's your birthday month or your yearly sub anniversary, you can choose the style and get a little something extra! For examples of what a bust looks like, please check out my recent ArtFight submissions :)

I'm going to do my level best to institute a hard 3-week turnaround rate for all regular commissions, and save the final week of each month for giving these rewards full priority along with onboarding new batches of clients for the following month's commissions.

I'm moving my subscription service over to Ko-fi, where anyone can give between $2-9 a month as a very generous tip and get access to my Discord server, or give $10+ for monthly bust rewards, early access to adoptables, and more! You can choose to give more than $10, but no other rewards exist for higher tier subs, it's up to whatever you feel is appropriate! Ko-fi has both Stripe and PayPal integration, which should be easier on the subscriber end, and it allows me to use PostyBirb to post across multiple sites at once, which makes it much easier to post early-access WIPs and finished work than it was on my old subscription service. It also automatically handles Discord onboarding and role assignment, yay!

I'm on the hunt for a simple Discord bot that can post a single repeating message on the first of every month with a link to a Google form for everyone to submit their requests, so that I don't have to ask for them manually. (If anyone knows of such a bot or is capable of making one, please get in touch!)

Previously I offered a whole suite of other rewards in addition to the monthly art -- things like subscriber-only request streams, early claims on adoptables, and even physical merch, which were not sustainable for me. Going forward, early adoptable claims for a discount will still be available as a reward, and I may occasionally do request streams, but on a less formally-scheduled basis and only as I have the free time to do so. I am not able to offer physical prints/stickers at this time; I might revisit the option in the future, but I need to know more before I try it again! I'll also be continuing to offer a subscriber discount on all commissions that will stack with other sales and discounts, along with the ability to skip the waitlist and jump directly into the work queue.

So to recap, if you subscribe to me, here's everything you get:

For $2-$9 USD: Discord server access with a special role, and my thanks for your generous support!

For $10+ USD: Discord server access with a special role, 24 hour early adoptable access with the ability to claim for a discounted price, a bust of a single character each month, first looks at finished artwork and WIPs/timelapses, commission discounts, and potentially more down the line.

My Discord is open to anyone, and all members can freely chat, post art, attend/host art streams, and answer polls regarding prompts for adoptable designs and more. You just get some nice bonuses for subscribing! While these subscription tiers are available, one-time tips and donations of any amount are still an option for commission clients or anyone else who just wants to show some love.

I hope this all makes sense and sounds enticing; I really love seeing people's OCs and getting to bring them to life and put my own little touch on them, and I'm very excited to start giving something back to all of you out there whose support means so very much to me, and without whom I could never do what I do. Thank you so much for checking out the Ko-fi! As a reminder, reward eligibility begins on August 1st! The tiers are active on Ko-fi now, but if you subscribe before August you won't be rewarded for the month of July, so keep that in mind.

[good-beanswrites]

hii!! can we get some platonic fuuta amane interactions please? thabks !!!

Ahh yes, thank you so much for the request! I love them so much ;--; They've been making my brain go brrrr lately with T3 possibilities, though I decided to stay away from the drama for now. Here something sweet after T1 verdicts but before the attacks -- they're just hanging out :3

Yuno smiled down at Amane, finding her hunched over a table of craft supplies with Fuuta. The guilty verdict had hit them hard, so it was good to see them in better spirits. She tried to peer over her shoulder to see what they were working on. “Aw, what are you two up to?”

Amane returned her smile. “Fuuta is teaching me to misbehave.”

His face twitched in horror. “Oi, you can’t just go around saying that!” He looked frantically at Yuno. “We’re just folding paper planes.”

Amane lifted her chin. “You said in middle school, you made them to throw in class.”

“I said my friends made them to throw in class. And it’s not like I’m telling you to throw them. I was just making them because there’s nothing better to do in this damned place. You were the one that said it looked fun and sat down to annoy me!”

Fuuta huffed at the accusation as Yuno walked away, laughing. He returned to the design he was folding. He hadn’t been giving an explicit step-by-step for each, but Amane was keeping up just fine. They each had a small pile of various plane designs they were adding to. 

Running a finger along a new crease, he gave Amane a sideways look. “Though, you could stand to misbehave a little bit.”

“I did.” She reached forward to mimic the fold on her own plane. “That is why I’m here.”

“Eh? I don’t mean you should commit crimes!” He scowled. “I’m talking about normal kid stuff, nothing against the law. Like staying out too late, driving your teacher crazy, funny vandalism–”

“--Vandalism is against the law.”

“Oh come on, it’s harmless! Don’t even try to argue that a little graffiti is comparable to what got you here.” He rolled his eyes. “So? What about that other stuff?”

She shook her head. With neither disappointment nor pride, she said, “I never left my home at night. And my teachers were far too strict.” 

“Aw, it’s the strict ones that are the most fun to prank!” He pointed to Amane, adopting the most persuasive voice he could manage. “You gotta do some of these things, or you’ll turn out with a stick up your ass. Like Kotoko, or Mikoto. Or a weirdo like Kazui and Mahiru. Shidou’s more or less normal, and he’s the type of guy to break some rules now and then.”

“And you?” She raised her eyebrows at him, feigning innocence. “I take it you turned out perfectly because you misbehaved as a child?”

“Hey, I never said I was a shining role model or anything. But I mean it. If you stay like this, you’ll grow up to be a boring loser, another cog in the wheel.”

“It is an honor to be a part of something bigger than yourself, to find belonging, and purpose.”

“Tch, don’t be such a pain!”

“I wasn’t.”

“You know that’s not what I was talking about!”

“What were you talking about, then?” She gave him the same expression as before, and wondered if could hide her genuine confusion. 

“Don’t play dumb. I know working in a group is a good thing, but you don’t want to kill yourself for leaders that don’t give a shit about you. That’s a major issue in this country, you know? In government, and corporations, and all that. That’s not belonging, that’s just exploitation.”

Amane stayed silent.

Oblivious to the emotions flashing across her lowered eyes, he nudged her in annoyance. “And the best way to break from that is to loosen up a bit. So have a little fun now and then, jeez!”

She picked her creation off the table. She turned it over in her hands. It had come out perfectly sharp and clean. “I’m having fun now.”

Fuuta, preparing to argue with whatever she said, blinked. “O-oh.” 

“At school, my favorite activities included choir practice and the arts. It has been difficult to sing here without accompaniment, so I am grateful to have the opportunity for crafts.” She looked at him earnestly. “Despite your past of disobedience,” she smirked, “I always enjoy your company.”

His expression twisted up, but he couldn’t hide the reddening of his ears. “What do I care if a brat like you likes my company?”

She smiled. “I’m not a brat. As established, I am very well-behaved.”

“That’s even worse!”

“Tell me about this plane, Fuuta.”

After sufficiently rolling his eyes and sighing, he agreed. He started explaining what made these planes different from the last: how they compared on speed, accuracy, and length of flight. It didn’t really matter if they were just going to toss them around here or the panopticon later, he thought it would be helpful to teach her anyway. Maybe if she ever was inclined, she’d remember which ones were best for pinpointing a teacher’s back, or a warden’s…

[etherealeden]

the spiritual and psychological way of processing negative emotions and regulating your nervous system

explore the other chapters on my blog

part4: different insights that allow more acceptance 🌸

These action steps are adopted from Carson & Langer (2006) as well as my own experiences.

Observe your environment and find blissful things

To cultivate a sense of safety and belonging and accept your own reality, start by observing new things in your environment. Look for small changes, things you love, and aspects that bring you joy and gratitude. Use these elements to ground yourself and make you feel secure. For me, this included activities like singing, drawing, going for walks in nature, cuddling, and meditating.

2. Allow momentum for change

It’s important to remember that you’re allowed to change and evolve and feel acceptance. Focus things that genuinely resonate with you and that you can commit to. For instance, when I struggled with body image issues I had to accept them first. However, at the same same time I decided to believe in a better reality where I loved my body. I had to learn that even the smallest actions contribute to building momentum toward this goal. It’s a process, and I’m allowed to make mistakes and take steps backward. But small changes and frequently recalling emotions that I can get behind make the difference. I began to gradually feel better about my body by listening to its needs, whether it required rest, movement, nourishment, or simply happiness.

3. Ambiguity

The world is not simply black and white, paradoxes exist. You can simultaneously dislike and care for your body. This dosen’t mean you have to dislike your body forever, but if this is the emotional state you are in currently than that is okay. Developing the ability to tolerate ambiguity is therefore crucial for building self-acceptance. I initially resisted acceptance, fearing it would keep me stagnant, but in reality, it had the opposite effect. Embracing acceptance allowed me to move forward and grow.

This was the final part! Thank you for staying with me during these blog posts. Later there will be a little summary for you, so be ready to take some notes 🤓. Also if you have some questions please ask them any time! No gatekeeping around here..

xoxo Nina 🌸

Literature

Carson, S. H., & Langer, E. J. (2006). Mindfulness and self-acceptance. Journal of Rational-Emotive and Cognitive-Behavior Therapy, 24(1), 29–43. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10942-006-0022-5

[caustic-caffeine]

my thoughts on the instagram ai situation, as a digital artist on the platform

figured i’d write and share this around so others in the community i’m in know my status. sooo, some basics for starters:

“Are you leaving Instagram? Where can I find you active?”

i’m staying on instagram for the time being. seeing as instagram almost certainly already has the data of my past posts, i won’t be deleting anything; going forward, i’ll be using ai disturbance filters and other anti-ai overlays for any stills i post. i anticipate using instagram for reels primarily, as well as staying in communications with mutuals and other artists. i do have a cara account, but will likely be posting intermittently until some issues i’ve noticed get addressed. going forward, i’ll most likely be at my most active over here! growth, fortunately, never was a priority in my social media presence so i’m not super concerned about that.

tldr:

instagram: gonna continue posting reels and occasional stills, will be primarily focused on interacting with fellow artists

here: most active! will post both rough and polished stills, as well as lore and whatever random thoughts pop into my head. (see pinned post for a tag guide)

cara: activity will be low unless shit really hits the fan on instagram and i can no longer protect my work via overlays. if you’re an insta moot, feel free to dm me if you want me to share your posts around, though! if the link doesn’t work: i’m @/asphodelity [EDIT] cara does work with an ai organization, hive; here is a post that goes into it and other things people have said about the platform! as i already wasn’t intending to use the platform all that often this won’t change anything for me, but make sure to do your research if you’re looking into the platform!

“Will this affect how much you post?”

not really! i already have a fairly sporadic posting schedule, so i’ll just be continuing what i’ve been doing: posting when i have things i wanna share :]

“Help! I’m an Instagram artist and want to know how to protect my art!”

i gotchu.

[EDIT] the non-glaze/nightshade/artshield filters are mostly ineffective! it won’t hurt you to use them, but if you can stick to using the glaze and nightshade sites!! if you don’t have a pc, you can apply to get a webglaze account!

how to (hopefully) opt out of your art being scraped in the european union (i think?)

how to (hopefully) do the same in the united states (note: post could be outdated)

other ways to protect your art: one, two, three, four

ai disturbance filters: one, two, three (set these to overlay at 30% as the top layer for most effectiveness! these aren’t as effective as using a website like glaze, but are better than nothing)

after june 26, no matter your region, you’ll be unable to opt out of ai data training. this affects, to my knowledge, everything you post, including captions.

“Any other thoughts?”

now, more than ever, we as a community need to stick together and support each other. don’t let anyone tell you your art isn’t worth anything; we as artists have something very special in our ability to create, express ourselves, and connect with the world around us, an algorithm and misguided techbros will never be able to take that away from us. keep pursuing what you love, my friends; we have to weather the storm to see the rainbow.

my dms are always open for art reasons. need a pep talk? i’m around. wanna collab or trade? i’d love to! need help boosting your social medias? i’m happy to help (although my presence is admittedly very small). whatever it is, i’m here and willing to help!

i’ll keep updating yall on this platform as my activity changes (or, perhaps, something big related to ai happens), so be sure to stick around if that seems interesting! also, please feel free to reblog this post and add more information i may have missed, that’s all for now, thank you for your time <3

[milk-ducts]

You're really out here thinking u don't have a relevant internet presence?? lmao please, ur like one of the best invincible blogs i follow and ur art is just beyond stunning. i LIVE for the rare moments u post those gorgeous drawings, u capture these characters in a way no one else does and have such a way with color picking and rendering AHHHH. And don't even get me started on your character analyses, like the way u pick apart immortal and cecil just makes me see them in an entirely different way and anytime you post i know im in for a treat

you're a gem in this fandom and we're so lucky to have u, i just wish u were more active but i get it, life happens. i'm always happy whenever i see u post SOMETHING, even if it's just you reblogging other artists. point is, we love u, i love u, and u better know how much u mean to ur followers

i love u so much u funky little creature keep doing u and being the light of my dash. merry christmas, here's to another year of me thirsting after your art and yelling into the void abt how much i adore u. <333

WTF…,…. IM LITERALLY GONNA KILL MYSELF WJAT./.,… /J i seriously have such a hard time seeing any sort of value and or relevance in the things i post but msgs like this remind me there r actually ppl out there who do enjoy and look forward to my rambles n doodles,, and i am just,, so grateful……………. !!!!!

LIKE U DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME AAAAHHH THANK U THANK U THANK U.. IM ON MY KNEES. i feel so blessed to have followers like u who stick around even when i disappear for months on end.,, just know that anytime i do post, it's literally only becuz of sweethearts such as urself motivating me from the shadows <3 i appreciate every single one of u more than words can describe,, i wish yall would get more active here as well !! (INVINCIBLE TUMBLR FEED),, its such a great fandom filled w sm wonderful and talented ppl on here !!!

ALSO ANON U BETTER KNOW I LOVE U TOO U PRECIOUS ANGEL!!!!! LIKE IF I COULD REACH THRU THIS SCREEN N SMOOCH U I WOULD!!! AWAGHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGjHGGUIOIUFYG i hope the rest of ur holidays are as bright and cheerful as u made mine today. ur the best bb now if u'll excuse me imma go cry myself 2 sleep bc i can't handle this kind of stuf….. (also.. it is lat,e,, for me .. < 3 gn everyone)

[wisteriaiswriting]

𝕆𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕚𝕟 𝕒 𝕤𝕖𝕒𝕤𝕠𝕟

Prompt: 3

Words: 1195

Growing up, with and without his radiant powers he wasn’t a fan of the cold. Snow included. But now he wished he tried to play in it at least once, but he was a stubborn child. Never agreeing to his parents' terms, always inside while his friends made snowmen and had snowball fights.

Even now. As the majority of the protocol spent the day outside doing a range of activities, from building snowmen to full on snowball fights. Watching as Jett and Raze managed to destroy Gekko and Chamber. Ironic since the girls betrayed Gekko and Chamber wasn’t even participating.

The others were either watching, doing other things or hiding in the warmth of the base. And you could say you were doing the same. The warmth wasn’t from the fireplace, although it was heating the room. But mainly from the man himself, Phoenix.

While he was looking out the window at everyone else you sat on the floor, against the couch. The same one a certain shadow was lounging on while knitting. You were comfortable, being thrown a few cushions and a blanket. You were focused on your project, which sat on your lap while you added the finishing touches.

If someone else looked at it most likely they wouldn’t have a clue what it was. But a few people knew, 2 people to be specific. Throughout the building process you had KAY/O at your side, as he helped with the main aspect of it, being the only one with that expertise. And Raze.

The project was fine on its own but something was missing. And who better than Raze, who quickly found the problem.

 “It doesn’t look good…Not that it’s bad, just doesn’t scream Phoenix. Ya know?”

And surprisingly, she was right. It was bland and while it does it’s job, painting it looked alot better. So she started, covering the device in bright orange flames all around with a white background. She made it look good while still being useful, as she was careful with the small brush to not cover anything that wasn’t meant to be covered.

Before you knew it hours had passed. Everyone who was outside had slowly trickled back inside, many heading back to their rooms for a warm shower. Once the majority had finished and returned to the living area, this was happening just as Raze leaned back from the project.

The otherwise silent room was then filled with her back cracking from being hunched over for hours. Swiftly placing everything back into their designated places before doing one final check over, soon deciding it was good. She handed it over before using the same hand to slap your shoulder.

“Go get him!”

As she was speaking she started pushing you through the door, locking it when you were outside. Well, guess it’s time. You wandered down the hall for a while before reaching the living area, surprisingly not a lot of people were inside. With a few more cleaning up in the kitchen, Sage noticing you quickly.

“Y/N, you missed dinner, but I did leave some in the fridge.”

“Thanks Sage, but do you know where Phoenix is?”

“Last time I saw him was at dinner he grabbed a plate then left.”

“Thanks!”

At her words you left, heading towards one of the few places he would be. Either training, in a meeting or in his room. Luckily you found him on your first try, in his room. The lights were off, with the only light source was a salt lamp on his desk, one gifted by Chamber from a mission.

The lamp showed how Phoenix was sitting on his bed, using his fork to slowly push around his food. The sauce has made everything else soggy, showing he hasn’t eaten much, if any.

“Jamie?”

“Hmm?”

He didn’t even look up at you, instead dropping his fork.

“If you want I can leave?”

You were giving him a chance to be alone, watching as he thought about it. Soon enough he waved you over, letting you sit on the bed, although on the end. But hey, you’re still here. You both sat in silence for a few minutes before he threw the plate onto his bedside table, leaning forward.

“Why are ya’ here?”

“I had something to give you, but I’m not sure if you want it now.”

“Don’t you leave, not after that!”

Teasing Phoenix with a gift is a sure fire way to get him to talk, and luckily you had the gift now. So instead of saying anything you pulled it from one of your pockets, laying it on the sheets in front of him. Letting him grab and inspect the bracelet.

“You made this?”

“You say it like you don’t believe me?”

“After what I’ve seen you do? Nah.”

“Mind you I did! And had some help…”

During your time arguing you didn’t get to see him putting it on. The band cooled down his body, starting from the same wrist before slowly fading down to his feet. Which was a first, and openly welcomed after years of being warm.

“Like you did–”

Your response was cut short. Seeing his smile slowly grow to cover his face, eyes were becoming teary. Before you could do anything he had crossed the room to drag you into a hug, dropped just as quick.

“Y/N, mate! I gotta go test this!”

Jamie was quick to leave the room, hearing him getting further from you. Leaving you with no choice but to follow, able to catch his shoe around the corner. Luckily it was easy enough to figure out where he was going, also the fact he left the door wide open.

He was so distracted by the snow, being able to walk in it and finally feel its coldness instead of the evaporated version. Watching the snow instead of you, who has grabbed a handful of snow and compacting it. He was not prepared for what you had planned, beat him in a snowball fight.

Before he knew it you let go of the snowball, letting it fly towards him. Quickly hitting the back of his head.

“Oi!”

He tried to flick off any remaining snow while facing you.

“You mind luv’?”

Instead of responding you reached down to grab even more snow. Looking up to see him already backing away, turning into a sprint when you followed.

“Come back here Jamie!”

“No way, you gotta stay away! ”

The next few minutes were spent with you chasing Jamie and him running away. Ending with him successfully hiding for a few minutes, luckily that's all he needed. Sneaking around the best he can, trying to find you before you find him.

Seems like luck is on his side, finding you kneeling in the snow. Watching as you kept making the ball bigger, although you’ll never get to throw it, at least not tonight. As he managed to sneak up on you, and while you were busy stuff snow into your shirt.

“JAMIE!”

Your only response was him laughing while running back inside. You rushed to grab your own handful and run after him.

[diplonimbodocus]

lee spock and ler kirk content pretty please with cherry on top? <3

Comin' right up!

Thank you so much for your ask, I was so excited to get it! Plus lee!Spock is simply *chef's kiss*, I do approve of your taste.

I'm not sure if your preference would be TOS or AOS, but I think on this occassion we'll go... AOS, simply because I do think a lee!Spock is brilliant in the Kelvin timeline. Although everyone is free to imagine things as they wish!

This was just a quick little thing, I hope it's ok! Please enjoy! Without further ado -

"Doctor, I request that you do not question why I am here and you do not disclose to the captain my whereabouts." Spock said as he had suddenly marched through the medbay doors at pace, sparing not a glance at the doctor. Though tidy and matter-of-fact as ever, he held a manner of urgency about him.

"What in the - Spock! What are you talking about?! I've a routine examination in 20 minutes and I don't have time to waste on-"

"Doctor." Spock fixed Bones with a look which stayed his verbal assault. He then tucked himself quite flatly behind a cupboard which protruded from the internal bulkhead.

Bones threw his hands up in the air and grumbled, "Not even an explanation, fine then!"

Not a moment later, the sliding doors opened once again to reveal an agitated James Kirk, a little out of breath but Bones thought he detected a sparkle in his eye, the kind he had when there was an idea in his head.

"Did Spock come in here?"

"In the corner." Bones pointed over his shoulder with the stylus, going back to his datapad.

Spock quickly stepped out from his hiding place and froze facing Kirk, the two stopped at a distance. Keeping his eyes on Kirk, he spoke. "Doctor McCoy, I fail to see how you could misunderstand my clear instruction not to-"

"What did you really think I was gonna do? Use your logic, Spock."

The captain remained where he was, eyeing his first officer with that glint in his eye.

"So, Spock. Thought you could rely on old Bones to get you out of this did you?"

"Old?" Bones chimed in from the other side of the room.

"I did surmise he might be of some help." Spock said, body poised and sounding unsure of his words.

"Not your best idea, huh?"

"Evidently not." Spock said with a hint of facetiousness.

"Bones, lock the door."

Bones looked up in shock, before rolling his eyes and puffing his cheeks, moving to the door and exclaiming, "Fine! Whatever you two are doing, it better be done in 10 minutes. Some of us have a job to do!"

All the while, Spock had been watching intently for any sign of movement from the captain, and Kirk's eyes were trained on him. The two stood there, like a standoff. Bones watched, curiosity piqued. Everything was still, that is until Kirk moved his foot to step.

All in a moment, the room was suddenly a bustle. Spock leaped over a bed, Jim followed round it, Spock reached the other bulkead, past Bones, skirting the outside towards the door, doubling back when Kirk crossed the room to get there first.

Bones, in the middle of it all, shouted, "What the hell are you two doing?! This isn't a damn playground, it's a hospital!"

Jim was now advancing on a more and more cornered Spock, who had succeeded only in finding himself a small space at the back of the room to retreat to.

"Captain, I would request that you cease this endeavor and that we both return to normal activities immediately."

"Why Spock? You scared you'll let a little of that human emotion slip?" Jim grinned, though it was a clear taunt to draw Spock in.

"Jim. You know there is human in me. Why do you persist to attempt at forcing me to display it?" Spock replied in a more intimate tone.

"Because it's fun." Jim lunged forward, however just as he attempted to grab the vulcan, Spock crouched and slipped underneath his outstretched arms.

Always ready, Jim spun around on the ball of his foot and threw himself after the first officer.

"Gotcha!" He cried as he landed on top of Spock, his weight pushing him prone and keeping him there, on his face.

Spock fought against the heaviness holding him down, and given vulcans' strength, Jim was well near thrown off, but held on, grasping the other's collar as you would a rodeo. Spock said nothing save for the sounds of his struggles.

"So Bones... I've got a little question for you. Have you ever seen a vulcan laugh?" Jim practically grinned in his tone alone, and was met with renewed energy from the vulcan in question.

"Once, actually."

Jim threw a look of alarming question back at Bones.

"It's a long story." Bones replied.

Jim hesitated and then continued, still riding the bull.

"Well, you're about to see it again! Can you guess which vulcan on board this vessel can laugh, and has laughed today, and has been a pain in my ass for days, and incidentally, is insanely tickl-"

"CAPTAIN!" Spock suddenly shouted.

"-ish."

"You're not honestly telling me-"

"Isn't that right, Spock?" Jim put his hands onto Spock's sides below the ribs, and started squeezing up and down his flanks.

Spock shivered, and then went stiff as a board. Mysteriously not a sound had emerged, but the change was definite.

"Uh, Jim? Is he ok?"

"Don't worry, he'll come out of it in a minute." Jim said with certainty and continued pressing all along the vulcan's sides.

Rightly enough, a few second later Spock was shivering again, yet constantly, and a strange humming noise was coming from the floor beneath his head. Jim kept squeezing and the humming came in more sporadic bursts. Bones could see round the side of his head, and from that small view, he saw the corners of the vulcan's mouth were turned up.

"Holy..."

"Wait for it, Bones..." Jim squeezed up and down another time, before suddenly clutching on tightly around Spock's midriff, right over his ribs with both hands and vibrating his fingers firmly over those delicate bones.

"Hah!" Spock squeaked out before burying his face into the floor.

"C'mon Spock... Don't hold out on me!" Jim teased, smiling big as he continued to torture Spock's ribs. Spock was now starting to jitter over the hard floor as if electrocuted, hopping this way and that as the captain's fingers followed his every movement.

"CaHAHptain! DeHEsist immediHAHtely!"

Though the effects of Jim's ministrations were obvious, Spock had thus far managed to contain his reactions to short bursts of movement and sound.

Jim spidered his fingers further down towards Spock's waist and hips. Spock began to wriggle more noticably as the fingers descended. As they landed in the dips of his hips he suddenly and violently curled inwards and finally, broke.

"NOHOhohoho!! Cahahaptaihahain nohohohooo!!"

"Bones - vióla".

The doctor simply looked on with his mouth hanging open.

"E-E-ENOUHOUHOUHOUGH!" Spock appeared unable to fight back, as his body responded in a solely reactive way.

"But Spock, buddy! You love this so much!"

"CAAHAHAHAPTAIHAIHAIN!!!"

"Call me Jim."

"J-JIHIHIHIIIM!!"

"Little louder..."

"JIM!!!"

"Now a little quieter."

"JI- JihihiHIM!"

"Now, touch your toes!"

Spock shook his head hopelessly and melted into laughter as Jim lead a merciless assault all over him.

"Hey Bones, check this."

Jim scratched from top to bottom along the writhing Vulcan's spine, teasing along and to either side, only for his first officer to curl upwards, laughter turning to high giggles.

"Well wouldya look at that." The doctor said, crossing his arms over his chest. "A giggling vulcan. Cute."

"Yeah well if you think that then get over here and help me, he's gonna throw me off!" Jim now battled to stay on as he attempted to squeeze the backs of Spock's thighs.

"Actually, much as I would love to wipe the smile off - or on - that guy's face, I'm going to have to break it up. Before my patient arrives."

Spock nodded his head frantically, unable to hide his smile, a greenish-yellow undeniably coving his cheeks.

"Aw." Jim whined.

His hands came to a gentle stop and over the next 30 seconds Spock's breathing slowed to a much more normal rate. He said nothing, remaining lying down with his eyes closed as if he had perhaps fallen asleep.

There was a moment of hung silence before suddenly -

Spock's hands were on the ground beneath him, pushing up, slowly yet in a way which seemed unstoppable, like a glacier following its course down a valley, and Jim, still perched on his back was brought along with it.

Jim wobbled and tried to find balance, surprise on his face, before a look of realisation hit him and he scrabbled up to his feet and back.

Spock rose, picking himself up to his feet. He stood, dusted himself off and released a controlled exhale. Jim stood wide-eyed until the vulcan turned to face him.

Though his face had been trained back to a more characteristic stoicism, there was no doubt about the cock to his eyebrow, the tightness of his lips, the set of his teeth which gave away his true feeling.

"Captain. You have exactly until I have finished speaking to make your exit- "

Jim did not wait around to hear the rest.

[birinboom]

Hello dearest darling Em! I am here to ask about HoshiEm, because I think it's adorable and I would like to know more <3

You are taking a trip together - where are you going? What activities are you doing together? What are you most excited about on your trip? Which of you hates packing the most?

Also if you feel like it, tell me a little about your man, because I don't know him 🎤

🤍🫂

Aaaaaah, my darling Roxy-Rose, thank you so so much for sending me this!!! 😭💖💖💖

We’re going on a trip!

He and I met in Tokyo, but Hoshina is actually from the Kansai region (Osaka/Kyoto/Nara/etc). So we’re taking a trip back to his home. We’re mostly planning on sightseeing, which is something I enjoy a lot, and he enjoys finding new places to show me. We can easily spend a whole day just wandering around one of the older parts of Kyoto and taking in the sights. I’m really looking forward to seeing new things and eating new food, and feeding some tame deer, and also just getting to spend some uninterrupted time with him, he’s always so busy.

Which of us hates packing the most?

That’s probably me 😅 I always panic a little bit thinking I’ve forgotten something so I spend a lot of time making lists and double and triple checking everything, and I end up packing way too much. I don’t know why but I’m unable to pack light, even if I put genuine effort into it. Hoshina, on the other hand, can fit everything he needs into a small duffle bag and I hate him a little bit for it. 

Tell me a little about him

So, funny story. My husband and I watched Kn8 together. At one point he came into my office while I had a piece of fanart of Hoshina on my screen, and said ‘oh is that who you like now? Isn’t he kind of an asshole?’

And he’s right. Hoshina is kind of an asshole and I still love him.

I’m gonna put my ramblings under a cut ‘cause there will be spoilers. And I don't know how to be brief. Cue that drawing of me wordlessly crying while pointing to a picture of him.

Kaiju no. 8 takes place in a world where kaiju (ie. monsters) regularly attack humanity. They vary vastly in both size and the way they attack. Some are human-sized, or smaller, some are about the size of a minivan, and some tower over the tallest skyscrapers (this part is important for later) 

Enter the Japan Anti-Kaiju Defense Force. Hoshina is the vice-captain of the 3rd division, which is centered in West Tokyo. He comes from a long line of swordsmen and kaiju slayers, but while he’s excellent with swords and very capable of dealing with smaller and mid-sized kaiju, guns are needed for the biggest ones. And he’s shit at using guns. 

Because of this, pretty much everybody in his life has been telling him that he should just give up. He’s not gonna make it, he’s just gonna cause trouble and get himself killed. The only one who believed in him is his now-captain, Mina. She’s the opposite of Hoshina, she’s excellent with guns but terrible with bladed weapons. And she believed that the two of them could compliment each other’s fighting styles enough to give him a genuine chance.

So this is where the asshole part comes into play. Because now Hoshina has the rank of vice-captain, he’s to a certain extent in charge of dealing with new recruits, and he WILL haze them. There’s one omake ending of the manga -which sadly never made it into the anime- where he’s overseeing a new recruit doing pushups as a punishment, he’s counting out loud, and then he starts counting backwards.

He’s an asshole in that whenever there’s a conflict that doesn’t directly involve him, he bursts out laughing. He will also quite readily tease people. But he takes his role as vice-captain very seriously. He’s ready to risk his life to keep people safe. He’ll go up against kaiju too big for him to handle if he has to, if nothing else then to buy time until someone better suited to fight them arrives.

It’s also shown that once he likes someone, he’ll go a long way to help them. It’s implied that he’s the one training the most promising of the new recruits (Kikoru) in using her axe, and he decides on his own to train the main character, Kafka, in hand to hand combat. 

(‘Course that last one only happens after Hoshina threatened Kafka with what turned out to be a very realistic rubber knife because he apparently holds grudges like a mofo)

I love him. I love his Kansai-accent. I love the way his voice goes nasal when he’s complaining about something. I love how he nearly always has his eyes closed. I love the shiver down my spine when he opens his eyes (shit’s most likely about to get serious!) I love his oversized canines. I love his stupid bowl-cut. I love the way he’s one of the few male characters (if not the only one) to use ‘boku’ about himself (and I have thoughts on WHY he does that!)

I love that he’s a bit of an asshole. I want him to tease me.

[you-are-so-much-better-than-that]

Alternative Timeline

So as of yesterday I have been on Tumblr for a YEAR! A WHOLE YEAR being a part of this beautiful wonderful incredible community that we have all built. And it has changed my entire life. I’ve made friends who I hope will be in my life long after we’ve forgotten about these characters and this universe (will we ever though…?). I have crafted and written and collaborated. I have participated in a zine and cobbled together a couple of drabbles. I’ve had so much fun being your unofficial Keeper of the Shameless Timeline, trying to make some kind of sense of season 1 and, more recently, working alongside some of my favourite artists and people to build a whole ass calendar! It’s been the most wonderful year and I’m looking forward to the next! I’m not done doin this thing yet! 

Also, I know I haven’t been active these last couple of months, but I’ve noticed that there are a bunch of new people around these parts. I just wanted to say HI! HELLO! WELCOME!! I’m so glad you’re here! I see you all liking the things people are making and I know everyone appreciates the like, but I’m just gonna ask you to also hit that rb button! People are out here making things! For you! To enjoy! For free! Art and gif sets and fic! They take so much time, and it's so easy to show your appreciation! Just a couple of buttons! You don’t even have to go nuts in the tags (although we love that kind of unhinged behaviour around here). And if you wanna say hi to us, make some friends, I highly encourage it. It was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Ok I’ll shut up now. Let’s talk timeline!

I have tried my best to follow the logic, though sometimes there is none, and follow the clues, no matter how few! And I have tried to do it with as little bias as possible.

HOWEVER!

You guys, I have a confession to make.

There is a possible other timeline that season one could follow.

I do not like it! But, I am here to give you, my precious timeline enthusiasts, the truth! Even if it hurts me. Even if it makes no sense (because it often doesn’t. JW doesn’t believe in time). Even if it takes away the possibility of a Christmas bang and a New Year’s bang, which, truly, would be a tragedy and is the main reason I refuse to follow this other timeline.

Under the cut you will find the second possible timeline. You decide which you prefer, and tell me why! I need well-formed arguments for or against please!

Thank you all for being here with me this year. It hasn’t been an easy one, but you all have made it just a little bit better. I love you all!

Alternative Timeline

Episode 1: Remains the same at November 15, 2010. There is a calendar. Fiona points at it. No disputes here!

Episode 2: This is where it all could change. Bear with me. There is a possibility that this episode might have taken place on January 28, 2011, over two months after the first episode. Here’s why: Frank gets his cheque the last Friday of the month. In both November and December, the last Friday is a holiday, so this acts with the assumption that this is now January and it’s been 2 months since the first episode. I don’t love this idea because nowhere else in this season do they make such a massive time jump.  A few weeks, maybe, but not two months. This also then changes the entire timeline. No Christmas/New Year’s bang, either. What do you guys think?

Episode 3: As this episode starts the Thursday following the previous episode when Tony Takes Fiona to his award ceremony, it leaves Tony’s deflowering to have taken place on February 4.

Episode 4: If I follow the logic of my original calendar which has episode 4 on the same weekend as episode 3, then this means this episode alternatively takes place on February 6th. This actually works quite well with an upcoming event in episode 6. 

Episode 5: I worked a little backwards here. I had to place episode 6 on February 16th, so the only date episode 5 could take place was February 12th-13th, meaning Kev and Vee got married on February 13th in this alternate timeline.

Episode 6: At the beginning of this episode, Carl hands Fiona a note from last Friday and it is now Wednesday. I initially made the assumption that it is Wednesday Dec 15th, however, in this alternative timeline, I’m placing this episode on February 16th. And there is evidence of this date. If you zoom in quite a bit, it’s got a date on it, February 11, 2011, the Friday before February 16th.  But I hate this timeline because it just doesn’t make sense! There is a calendar change in episode 8, two episodes from now! It goes from December to January in that episode. I can get that the calendar is unreliable, but if they’re gonna change it, why change it to the wrong month?? No. I refuse. But anyway. There is evidence.

This now leaves us three weeks to squeeze in the Bangiversary, Slim Jims, and two episodes of Monica before we get to the last two episodes, which we know for a fact take place on March 18-20th, same as the original timeline. Here is the only way this would work:

Episode 7:  Episode 7 would be on February 18th-19th, making Ian and Mickey’s Bangiversary February 19th, getting rid of the possibility of a Christmas and New Year’s bang. Also, speeding up their entire first bit of their young relationship. We just went from a possible two months of secret fucking before Mickey was arrested to a mere two weeks? No! I don’t like it!!

Episode 8: This puts SlimJims and Milkovich-Ian Sandwich on February 25th-27th.

Episode 9: Frank would call Monica on March 5th and, she’d would show up around March 6th. That same night, Mickey is arrested. 

Episode 10: On March 7th, Ian finds out he’s not Frank’s son and Monica abandons her children again.

Episodes 11 & 12: Remain the same. We know they take place on the Friday-Sunday after St. Patrick’s day.

I will admit, there is an elegance to the end here with the Karen storyline. In the original timeline, if she goes to the ball with her dad on February 21st, and then goes emo child on March 18th, about three weeks later. That doesn’t really fit, either. However, I could be convinced to move the entire Monica saga down so that it all happens in March instead of February. This could work actually. (Yes you are reading me figuring this out in real time, folks!)

WAIT!!! WHAT IF we have an alternative-alternative timeline?? And it looks like this:

We ignore the weird Carl teacher’s note thing from episode 6, and we keep episodes 1-8 the same as is in the original timeline, giving us the very, very important Christmas and New Year’s bang as well as more than two weeks of secret fucking, while episodes 9-12 look more like this second timeline, making the Karen storyline make more sense. Oh I think I like this!

Here are some visuals:

OG Timeline:

Timeline 2.0

Timeline 3.0

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?? Does anyone have opinions? Do we still care?? Did we ever…?

There you have it folks! Season One all tied up in…a really messy Gordian knot. I hope you enjoyed this journey as much as I have! On to season two! (I promise I won’t take a whole year this time!)

[obsessed-vixen]

Connor x reader. (Lil flustered con con boi)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: connor likes you...alot. A LITTLE TOO MUCH. You decided to help clean out and organize some of his papers. But, you find some paper that he claims he has no memory of.

Request: no.

TW: none. (Maybe obsession?)

FLUFFY FLUFFF (maybe a little flirting.)

Anyway. Just read omg. (Also my wattpad is @ArchangelVixen I have a markiplier Pfp :3)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever since he laid eyes on you he's been obsessed. The little movements you do when you talk, the way your voice sounds, your interests. Everything about you has been on his mind. Even the first time you met.

You were trying to get coffee out of the machine but it wouldn't budge. Connor saw your frustration and helped you out. Eventually, you got your coffee. You looked up at him and gave him a small "thanks." While having a soft smile. As soon as you walked off that moment replayed in his head.

Few weeks later he finally got the confidence to talk to you. He was a blushing mess. He didn't want to seem weird. You thought he was funny and became friends with him. Of course he always saw you as more then friends.

One day you came into the DPD a little early then him. While walking past his desk, you saw he left some papers out. Normally you wouldn't think much of it but you glanced at one that had your name on it. Curious, you picked it up. Thought nothing much of it until you read further and further.

You found something you hadn’t really anticipated. You’re leaning against his desk, trying to keep a neutral face while you read It’s… detailed romantic descriptions, about you and him. How soft he imagines your skin to be.

how tenderly you look at him when the lovelight is in your eyes, his strong and firm arms wrapping around you, passionate kisses and declarations of affection.

You keep reading. Chapters of undying love, pages of yearning, paragraphs dedicated to how soft your lips are- You’re becoming more flustered and giddy by the second. Then he walks in. You quickly hid the papers behind your back, while smirking at him.

"Oh hello y/n...what are you doing–" The realization hits him like a brick. His eyes widen. He quickly tries to grab the papers behind your back. "Oh come on! I wasn't even near the ending yet!" You whine, teasing him just making him more flustered by the second.

"I- just- please i-" he didn't know what to say. He was to flustered and embarrassed. Luckily no one else was at the DPD yet. He rushes forwards and snatches the pages from your hands.  “I don’t know how these papers got in here, I- I’ve never seen this writing before in my life!" He declares.

"Come on man, don’t leave me in suspense. It’s fantastic work, some of your best~" He’s caught in between being flustered and his embarrassment. He stumbles through a mishmash of sentences. “I- you- it’s, well- The thing is-” You continue to tease him.

“Now if my analysis skills are any good, I’d say you like me. More than like me, if your reaction is anything to go by." You lean closer to him, while slightly tugging on his tie. "Tell me, are you just as passionate a man as you are a writer? Maybe we should find out~”

His stuttering and stumbling gets worse. You’re actively flirting with him instead of being disgusted or horrified, so he supposes it’s a victory. "I- uhm-" he froze, looking into your eyes. Blushing everywhere. You tilt your head a little and give him a mischievous smirk. You move away. "But it all seriousness, I wouldn't mind having a romantic relationship with you. I like you too. Of course no need to say ye‐"

He pulls you into a kiss. You hum delightedly and kiss him back. You push him slightly backwards. Leaning him against his desk. You pull away after a few minutes, both panting. "So...do I taste like what you...imagined~?" He stayed silent, trying to process what just happend. "You taste devine, better then I imagined~" he smirked and pulled you back in for a more passionate kiss. This time turning you around and pushing you against the desk.

~Extra~

While having your make-out session. Hank walks in disgusted. "Get a room!" He says while groaning. You too laughed and pulled away. Holding hands for the rest of the day.

-Vixen<3

[nohoperadio]

3, 7, 12, 25, 32, 42, 56, & 69 :)

whoa what a bounty, thank you!

3. Foaming hand soap or normal hand soap?

Normal! With these kinds of product I generally tend to assume that any differences between the fancy version and the standard version are irrelevant and/or illusory, but also when I've used the foamy stuff in public bathrooms it doesn't feel as satisfying, I need a little friction in my soap to feel like something's happening there you know?

7. Any groceries you've been getting into lately?

Hmmmm! It's probably not recently enough to call recent but I've been meaning, and keep forgetting, to pick up another jar of this aubergine pesto that I had low expectations about but was actually super good.

12. How many cups can you see from where you're sitting?

Only one! I only own one non-mug drinking vessel though so the fact that there isn't a bunch of them lying around should not be considered impressive

25. Favorite old person activity?

This feels like something I should definitely have something for but nothing's coming to me right now... hmm I've noticed recently that when I'm sat in my chair doing nothing except listening to music I will naturally start rocking the chair back and forth, and it's making me really see the appeal of actual rocking chairs, I would like to try one out someday... maybe that's an aspirational old person activity?

32. How do you take your morning coffee/tea?

It's always a Twining's breakfast tea and I take it with soy milk (everybody else is moving on to exciting new vegan milks these days like oat or whatever, and I'm sure they're right that it tastes better but if I get a taste for that stuff I'll have to buy more expensive milk, so I don't wanna!) and no sugar (similar logic, I'm not sure I've ever had sugar in a hot drink and I don't really want to try, if I prefer it then I'm suddenly committed to consuming a bunch of extra sugar every time I want caffeine! Better to stay ignorant.)

The more philosophical side of how I take my morning tea has been described at some length here

42. What's an unjustifiably expensive appliance that you really want?

It's hard to fantasize about appliances in my current life situation because my flat is so tiny that the thought of having another largeish physical object to find a place for just stresses me out. Like, I don't even own a toaster because there's literally nowhere I could put it that wouldn't be a huge hassle. To be honest if you broaden the meaning of "expensive" to include "expensive in space terms" the answer is probably literally "a toaster", that's the appliance I don't have that I most often think about how nice it would be to have one!

56. Favorite low-effort meal that you make?

The Beans is also your favourite low-effort meal, whether you know it yet or not

69. What are you looking forward to next week?

This is such a nice question but I simply do not make plans. The only non-work thing I have even lightly penciled in next week is that I want to try attending a run with my local lgbt running club, but it's probably misleading to describe that as a thing I'm looking forward to given that I might be too scared and not even do it (I'm scared of most things)

[itstopplingdomino]

WIP Tag

Thank you for the tag @myst867! Juggling between university classes, personal life and an alter ego in the internet is a tough thing, and I'm sure most agree TT I will be listing them in order of priority too!)

List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)

An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing

Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!

Then tag 10 writer friends

Titles

Untitled (coming soon) - I made a promise to write a short fiction based on how I feel after taking my test. Reader thought of Andrew Larson as a person who keeps himself; probably arrogant about his intelligence too. But in a make-up test session, reader learnt that he's actually the complete opposite.

Burning Desire - Supposed to be one chapter one-shot in celebration of Valentine's day, but I am working on the second (final) chapter. Garreth Weasley realises he has romantical feelings for reader just as Valentine's day is nearing.

Paper Bird - A potion product mishap causes reader to replace negative words into its kinder version. First part is posted, but I gotta finish up the second part.

Falling (you say i'm wise beyond my years) - Based on Isabela LaRosa's Older. Aesop Sharp has many secrets - and you are one of them. It's not explicit but it does have mature themes.

Tolerance - Just an intrepretation on how certain Harry Potter characters would react when they find out you're hurt (and doesn't seem like it from the outside). Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 and onwards are on the way!

Mainly Hogwarts Legacy universe and all is x reader pairing, all except 4 is minor-friendly (just be warned of mild cursings). It just so happens that these two weeks are packed with tests and assignments, so I'd be active to lurk but too exhausted to write. I gotta get back on writing as soon as the urgent big stuff in life is dealt with.

Upcoming Scenes, Events, Details

Untitled (coming soon) - We're at a point where reader's perception of Andrew will be changed. I think I would be done and ready to post this by this week (most likely the weekend).

Burning Desire - As soon as Garreth realises he has feelings for reader, he decides to act on his feelings but here comes the light angst. Let's just say, I love misunderstanding trope <3.

Paper Bird - Fred Weasley's redemption arc, basically. He will do everything to make ammends.

Falling (you say i'm wise beyond my years) - Upcoming chapter will be all about hurt/comfort, supportive figure, and generally fluff. Considering the first two chapters were playing on pining on reader's side and growing sexual tension (is reader imagining it..?), I want to write something a little more in-depth and platonic.

Tolerance - I've got to be honest; I am actually stuck on this. It's Ron's reaction and I couldn't decide which reaction would suit him best.

Please forgive me for tagging you TT Genuinely interested in your current progress of your works!! @applinsandoranges, @cuffmeinblack, @ravenelyx, @imtheslayeraskmehow97, @arthenaa.

One thing I realised from doing this tag game is that I need to have a masterlist. When will I get around doing that? We shall see. I gotta figure out Tumblr better first XD

[good-beanswrites]

haii bean !!! I wanted to bully kotoko request some funnies and sillies :) could you please write a drabble with amane and yuno (and anyone else) annoying kotoko . i feel like amane and yuno would go :3 and kotoko would go >:T… ofc feel free to ignore/dlt this :3

LOL of course! I'm sad I've become the Milgram Bully but I'm glad to give the boys a little break 😂 Thank you so much for the request, it was really fun getting back into the swing of writing with this! (also wooooo it's getting me so hyped for Deep Cover!!) Out of everyone, those two could definitely get away with :3-ing Kotoko to no end...

“Thirty-five, thirty-six, thirty-sev--”

“Hey, Kotoko?”

“Thirty-se, er, thirty-eight...”

“Kotoko?”

“Thirty- uh…”

“Hey, hey, Kotoko?”

She rolled onto her back, having lost count of her pushups. “Yuno.” Her voice was even between heavy breaths. “Can’t you see I’m busy?”

“Actually, I can see you need a break, and I’m happy to provide one!”

With a grunt, Kotoko sat up to face her. Yuno smiled down, her eyes sparkling with... something. Amane stood nearby, looking just as suspiciously sweet.

“What do you two need…?”

“We’re here to join you,” Amane said. “We wish to work out.”

“Oh? You’ve never been interested in exercise before.”

“Well, you yourself have motivated us to get stronger.”

“I’m pretty sure you just got bored…”

“Of course not! We’re committed!”

Kotoko studied them with a harsh look. They smiled innocently back. She narrowed her eyes. They widened theirs in anticipation. She leaned back. They leaned forward.

Yuno clasped her hands together. “Come ooon~ It’ll be fun having workout buddies! I’m a very hard worker, and you’ve seen how well-behaved Amane is. How bad could it be?”

Very, apparently.

She started with some stretches to get them warmed up. It was impossible to get them to focus, or hit the right positions, or stop giggling. Kotoko tried to tell them about breath control, but they seemed more excited to chatter on about everything under the sun. 

“I’ve always thought of stretching like this and being a famous dancer,” Yuno said. “Like a ballerina…” She did a little set of twirls. Kotoko tried to tell her not to do anything to crazy before they’d warmed up, but she just kept on spinning.

Amane’s eyes lit up. “I’ve always wanted to be in a marching band. They’re like dancers, a little bit!”

“Ooh, you’re right! I could never be so uniform, though, I want to do my own thing… like an idol or something!” Yuno did another set of moves. No one was following Kotoko’s perfectly timed toe touches anymore. 

“I guess we can get started…”

There was just as much dancing when they began jumping jacks, despite the fact that there were only two very clear positions to hit. Yuno wanted to do sets that traveled around the room, then ones that turned rapidly around in a circle, then ones that turned really rapidly in a circle. She and Amane made themselves dizzy with it. 

Kotoko decided a good, grounded activity would serve them better. They took turns holding each others’ feet and counting situps. Yuno got distracted easily, delving into nonstop conversation whether she should have been counting, watching, or doing the situps herself. She’d use her hands to talk, letting go of whoever she was meant to stabilize. Amane, on the other hand was practically a drill sergeant the way she tried to keep the others on pace. 

“Eight! Nine! Ten!”

“Amane, I think you’re supposed to count when I sit up, not force me to keep up with you…”

“Well don’t be so slow about it, and you’ll stay in time. Let’s go! Eleven! Twelve!”

“Ack!”

Kotoko rubbed her temples. Maybe adding some equipment could keep them busy? 

Jumping rope brought new struggles. Yuno spend ten minutes trying to recall a schoolyard rhyme to jump rope to, and teach it to Amane. They both encouraged Kotoko to join in, but she was jumping at a faster rhythm. That became impossible as their chanting filled the room. Moreover, none of them could stay in their own space. There were about five rope tangles before Kotoko decided to call a break.

(She didn’t exactly know what they needed a break from, they’d hardly done anything.) The girls seemed happy to sit down and chat, though. Kotoko reluctantly passed her protein shake over as they asked to try it. “One sip…”

She covered her mouth, deep in contemplation. Maybe these exercises were too easy. It was too easy to get distracted out here in the common area. They’d be forced to buckle down and focus on something more taxing, right?

She jabbed a thumb over her shoulder. “After this we’ll head over to my cell, okay? I have a bar installed for pull-ups. It’s tricky, but you have to start somewhere.”

“Hmmmm…” Yuno tapped a finger to her chin. “I’m not sure about that. You know… I think you were right. I think we were just bored. Well!” She clapped her hands together. “I guess we’ll stop bothering you now. Bye!” 

Amane joined her for a curt bow. “Thank you for your time.” 

Kotoko blinked after them. “Er, but…!”

Just like that, they were gone.

She released a long breath. She picked up her shake. It was empty.