#thank you for the ask! even though you know most of my shipping opinions intimately skldfjgdfg

[widowshill]

Controversial Shipping Asks: ✌️, 💘, 👀, 💢? Please and thank you!

controversial shipping.

Ship that you find cute but don’t ship: ✌️

bill / liz 😬 i do think they're cute, i adore bill's devotion, but I just ... don't think liz reciprocates romantically. permanent watery seaweed friendzone ghost.

Ship that is unpopular but you still like: 💘

i think this is a trick question because my favorite ships are always scraping the bottom of the popularity barrel, but. burke/vicki? I feel like they catch a lot of flack for being the boring heteronormative poster child but I Care Them. they're freak4freak To Me. what about the apple blossoms. people don't even know about the apple blossoms.

Ship you’re curious about: 👀

hmmmm judith/minerva? i do love judith and her toxic bf but have to say there's really something there in the faux-haunting that compels me.

Ship that is most misunderstood: 💢

barnabas/josette To Be Quite Honest. i don't even really have any eggs in this basket but there are two distinct flavors of approaching them where it's either, a, barn and josette are destined to be together and they'll reincarnate and find each other over and over again because it's True Love or b, josette kinda means nothing, the various brunette ingenues are just cat lasers distracting him from his true soulmate, the redhead milf. to be fair i think the second is More True but imo neither of them are right. the show's writing is also not immune from these categories, which is. sure is something.

[lady-in-the-lair]

Hii after tld I am trying to read the comics but I don’t know where to start, can you recommend me anything pls:3

Thanks for asking! Here are the most symbrocky of the comics. There are other good Venom comics, but this is where I'd start to fill in everything the movie left out:

“The Hunger” 1996 -- that's where I got my Tumblr banner image from. The most symbrock of any of the comics, in my opinion, even without saying anything outright. It explores the bond between Eddie and Symby and has a uniquely dark, eerie tone without going overboard on the edgelordness. I bought the whole volume it's collected in just for that storyline.

Mike Costa run, starting at issue #5 (the first four issues feature Symby getting abused by its host to the point that it regresses and is unable to speak properly. Eddie only shows up in Issues #5). I'm still unclear on why Eddie asked Liz Allen out other than to no homo a run full of "my love," "my darling," and literally giving birth together...clearly, it did not work.

"First Host" -- the Mike Costa extra featuring the symbrock baby, Sleeper.

Marvel Presents #5 (2019)  -- It's a collection of Marvel stories, one of which features Eddie and Symby getting intimate. I have mixed feelings about choices made in part of the comic, and the art is terrible, but the actual intimacy is great! Also, it's barely PG-13, it's all implied and more psychological than anything else and inspired me to write a fic, it was so validating.

For non-specifically symbrock content after the cut!

David Michelinie wrote some great general Venom stories I recommend checking out. Even without overt symbrock (which is just one aspect of the characters!), and the absence of Symby's voice, you feel like he gets the characters and his writing isn't all doom-and-gloom.

"Venom: Seed of Darkness" (Len Kaminski, who also has good content) -- Not symbrock; this takes place while Eddie is still a reporter, but it shows how and why he'd bond so closely with Symby even without their mutual hatred of Spider-Man. Everyone is afraid of the alien monster he's reporting on; he's fascinated and even sympathetic iir.

Carnage (2015) -- It's dark and spooky and while it features Eddie, he's bonded to a different symbiote and the symbiotes are not the focus of the story. I like it for the Lovecraftian elements and characterization of Eddie, who seems more like himself than in other recent comics--a bit of a himbo, trying to do the right thing, loves kids, and is generally respectful of women (bunch of female characters in this one).

I also like the Agent Venom comics, though Eddie only briefly appears and Symby is bonded with Flash Thompson, the soldier who lost his legs in the movie. Those are just generally solid action comics with some character development for Flash.

I do not personally recommend the other pre-Costa 2000s Venom comics, as they mostly feature Eddie and Symby hating each other to various extremes and being generally very OOC. This is the era when Venom got dark and edgy and weird in a bad way, with Eddie going off the rails and Symby having a variety of awful hosts. Some good stuff to cherry pick, like Symby still loving Eddie when it sees him in that Anti-Venom getup, but generally bad, bad, bad imo.

I'm only current as of the beginning of Donny Cates's run, as I didn't like where he was going with it and the Look How Dark and Edgy This Is of it all. He also was disrespectful to fans who shipped symbrock (despite it being canon in the Costa run) and tried to no homo it...by having them co-raise a son and having Symby tell Eddie "I love you." Whatever he intended, he clearly backed away from the symbrock so hard he bumped into himself. All that being said, he does explore what Eddie and Symby mean to each other and packs in some good grieving from Eddie when he loses Symby (....who is a dog at the beginning of the run...)

Still, I'm sure there's a lot to like in there even if his dismissal of fans and worship by dudebros has always left a bad taste in my mouth and I stopped reading relatively soon.

I'd avoid Venom: The Madness, too. Hate that one!

Something to be aware of is that both Eddie and the symbiote are very different in the comics than they are in the movie! It varies from writer to writer, but Symby isn't as vocal and sassy and Eddie is just a different character with certain constants that didn't make it into the movie much--a difficult childhood with a distant father, loves kids, uses big words, Catholic, bodybuilder, generally respectful of women (okay that might just be my opinion after reading a lot of comics and cherry-picking the series I like--do not read Venom: The Madness!), and wants to protect innocents, his defining trait.

[writeyouin]

Can i request reader and mtmte skids spending time together at swerves, with the conversation going to bad pick up lines. Skids takes it as a challenge and what starts off as cheesy pick up lines devolves into smooth come ons that has Reader flushing like mad and badly keeping their composure as Skids tries to figure out what makes them tick. Thanks!!!

Skids X Reader - Pick Me Up and Take Me Home

A/N – So, I wrote this twice because the first copy accidentally got deleted today. Oh well, I’m happy with it.

Warnings – None.

Rating – T

“Grab your coat, you’ve pulled.”

You looked at the mech addressing you to see if he was telling a joke. One minute, you were sitting peacefully on a barstool at Swerve’s, reading your book (a universal sign of not wanting to be disturbed) then there was this mech, telling you you’d pulled, in a lame attempt to ‘pull’ you himself.

What was his name? Roller? Gearhead? Something else entirely? Honestly, you had no idea. He wasn’t one of your friends aboard the Lost Light. Probably just another mech too curious about sex with a human for all the wrong reasons. It wasn’t that you wouldn’t be intimate with a bot, but to borrow a worn-out phrase, they could at least buy you dinner first.

“No thanks,” You said coolly.

“Sorry, what?”

You sighed and closed your book, swivelling your seat so as to face the offending bot.

“No thank you,” You enunciated the words slowly and loudly.

“But- But Getaway said that would work,” The unnameable bot wheedled. “Was it the pick-up line itself?”

“Honestly, it was a myriad of things,” You replied, irked that you were forced to continue such an inane conversation. “But for the sake of your ego, sure, let’s say it was just the pick-up line. If you knew anything about me, you’d know that that is one of the lines I hate the most. There’s no witty wordplay, it’s grossly presumptuous, and really, it’s just dull, overused, and lazy.”

“Oh…”

“But hey, that’s just my opinion. So, why don’t you go and try it on someone else. Go on, off you pop,” You said nodding your head towards the exit.

The bot lamely left, not even bothering to walk; he used the wheels on his pedes to roll away sadly. You still didn’t know what he was called, but with a depressing exit like that, you decided to nickname him Mopey Joe in lieu of anything better.

Now that you were free, you swivelled your chair back to the bar. You were about to re-open your book, when a voice to your left said, “Were you on Star Trek because someone set their phaser to stunning.”

You glanced at the bot who sat on the corner stool. He had been there all night, reading something on his data pad. You knew his name, even though you had scarcely spoken to him before.

Skids.

He was memorable.

You had seen him around the ship multiple times, always doing something different. He seemed to hold the belief that any skill was worth learning.

“Really? You too?” You asked sardonically, your hand on your cheek. “This another one of your skills, or are you just trying to beat the last guy?”

“Just having some fun is all, unless you’re not up for it,” Skids grinned, an unspoken challenge in his tone.

“I’m up for it if you are,” You perked up, glad to poke fun at the failed flirtation.

“Good, because it’s your turn.”

“If I could rearrange the alphabet-”

“I’d put you and I together,” He finished for you. “A little overused, isn’t it?”

“Just a warm-up,” You said tartly.

“Okay,” Skids stroked his chin, his processor filled to the brim with things he could say. He wanted to win. There was no prize, but life was a game, and he, its champion player. “What’s your favourite number?”

You raised an eyebrow, to which he inclined his head as if suggesting you play along.

“All right, I’ll bite, uh… 42.”

“42? That’s alright, I suppose. My favourite number is yours.”

“Smooth, if the other participant is playing,” You conceded. “Uhh… Okay, I got one. I’ve heard of Optimus Prime, but you hottie, are Optimus Fine.”

“Ooh, your tone really helped carry that one. Suggestive, but not too much, a nice flirty edge. That was good, and well catered to Cybertronians. Impressive.”

And so the game went on. Occasionally one of you would pause to order the other a drink or to ask a general question about each other’s lives.

You learned that Skids was a theoretician, who tended to daydream.

“Was that an electric shock? Nope, just the thrum of my spark when I saw you.”

He, in turn, learned that you enjoyed comic books, films with practical effects, and weren’t sure what job you wanted on the ship; only that you desperately wanted to find some area to work in.

“I didn’t believe in God, but there must be one if someone as stunning as you exists.”

He loved Earth music and had developed a collection since being stationed there years ago.

“Are you secretly a Decepticon? Because you have conned me into loving you.”

He found that you were actually at Swerve’s trying to learn how to adapt to social situations since you usually felt too awkward to enter public spaces.

“I should take up weightlifting. It’ll give me the strength to pick up hot mechs such as yourself.”

He grinned at that. You learned that you adored that smile… and the mech it was on. You memorised it, and the way it lit up his optics.

“Nice legs, what time do they open?”

You sputtered a laugh. He learned that he loved the sound of your laughter like liquid happiness tickling his audials. He recorded the sound.

Finally, Skids looked around, finding that Swerve was grabbing his mop bucket, the subtle sign to any remainers that he was going to shut the bar within the next few kliks.

“Huh, guess we should be going,” Skids noted.

“Yeah…” You murmured, eyes downcast at the thought of parting from Skids, “I suppose we should.”

“Oh, just one more line first, I think I have a winner,” Skids grinned mischievously.

“Yeah? Go on then,” You settled yourself back atop your seat, awaiting the next line to make you chortle.

Skids got down on one knee. Your breath caught in your throat as he leaned close to whisper, his lips gently grazing your earlobe, “What’s bright red and something I like sleeping with?”

“… I- What?” You asked.

He pulled lightly back, then kissed you, just staying long enough to feel you get closer before he pulled back, leaving you longing for more.

“You.”

You reached up to cover your burning cheeks.

“I- I have to go,” You stammered, stumbling off your stool.

Skids smiled as he watched you leave. He was going to call you tomorrow, then every day after that, and never once would he resort to ‘Grab your coat, you’ve pulled.’ You deserved more, and he was happy to provide you with witty wordplay, humour, and romance to boot.

Once more before leaving, he played back the sound of your laughter. Primus, you fascinated him. He planned to do everything he could to find out what made you tick.

[ao3-oner]

Hi ao3oner! I really enjoyed reading your works (especially WKFA, specifically MSI) and wanted to ask if you have any ship/hc for Kiin? Just curious if there was anything more behind (the very delicious bondage) KiHends or if you envision Kiin with anyone else. Or if you don't, that's fine too!

Hello hello!

Thank you so much for reading and for the ask! Sorry that it took me forever to get back to you - to tell the truth, I'm currently working on a Kiin-centric WIP that I was hoping to finish and post before replying because it's so relevant, but I think I still need a few more days on it and I felt bad about leaving this unanswered for so long. So, here we go! Let's talk about Kiin and his relationship with Lehends, intimacy, etc.!

See, I consider myself to be a huge fan of a certain specific flavor of KiiHends. Unfortunately, that happens to be a different flavor than most other enjoyers of the ship whom I've spoken to, on account of the fact that I strongly believe that Kiin is not romantically attracted to Lehends. Like, not in the slightest. Now, does that necessarily mean that Kiin isn't sexually intimate with Siwoo? Of course not! That's where the fun part comes in:

The part I like most about developing this ship is exploring the why. Why does Kiin sleep with Siwoo, even when he very clearly Does Not Want That Man? There are a couple of reasons I've played around with. In my WKFA universe, as implied in the Siwoo Explosion scene, Kiin feels almost obligated to have sex with Lehends. That's not to say that he doesn't enjoy the sex - clearly, he does - but the reason that he does it is less because he enjoys it and more because he thinks it's important for Lehends to have an outlet to let off steam, and WKFA Lehends finds that outlet in the form juggling his many FWB-esque relationships. I think one thing that is very important to Kiin across all universes is performance: he wants to do well in the competitive scene (obviously), but he also wants to be sure that he's doing everything in his power to secure his team's success. If that includes sleeping with a certain promiscuous support so that he can focus up in game, so be it.

An adjacent/additional reason that I think Kiin might sleep with Lehends is to get him off his back for once. Anyone who's seen Kiin and Lehends interact in vods, backstage content, etc. is well aware of the fact that Lehends flirts with Kiin very heavily and messes with him almost non-stop. This angle is more of the hate-sex variety, which is also quite spicy, despite being obviously problematic (I do NOT agree with the message that pestering repeatedly and ignoring the word "no" is a good way to get someone to have sex with you). Tbh, I don't think there's a single version of KiiHends that's not at least a bit problematic, though.

That kind of feeds into a third KiiHends hook up reason that I'm a big fan of: the rebound angle. I am of the opinion that a major reason that Lehends flings himself so heavily at Kiin is because he's trying to fill the void that Ruler left in his heart (and between his legs), and I think in turn part of the reason that Kiin rejects him so adamantly at first is because he knows. Kiin knows that Siwoo doesn't actually love him for him - he's just trying to find someone to warm his bed until he can either get back together with or get over Jaehyuk. But what if Kiin also had someone like that? Not so much an ex, but someone who he was too afraid to ever start a proper relationship with, someone he had feelings for, but he refused to ever act on them for fear of ending up with a broken heart? That's another avenue that I absolutely love for them - that Kiin knows that Siwoo is just using him sexually, but it's fine because he gets to use Siwoo right back. And they both pretend they're fine. *chef's kiss* I've strongly considered writing a short fic about them having this type of relationship.

Now, you might also be wondering if I have any alternative, healthier relationship prospects for our beloved Kiin, to which I will reply by honestly saying that I have never seen Kiin happier than when he is looking at Moon Woochan. I think Cuzz is cute, sweet, and overall a very good match for Kiin's more walled-in personality. I know there are only a handful of fellow KiinCuzz fans out there, but they just so happen to be some of the coolest people I've ever met - that explains why every single one of the KiinCuzz fics on AO3 is an absolute banger. No leaks or spoilers, but a new one might join their roster in the next week or so...

Thanks again for the ask! Gen.G, fighting, and hope to hear from you again soon!

[katyspersonal]

002 for Mico and Rom both please?

Oh!!!!!!! Hell yea!!!

(Asks from this ( x ) meme)

002 I Give me a character & I will tell you

• How I feel about this character

For Micolash: I feel a LOT of things about Mico. He is genuinely one of the most important fictional characters that I ever had in my life. Not just that, but there were many bizarre and significant dreams connected with him, and even some things transcending into waking life.

I actually feel a bit reclusive to elaborate as these are very intimate matters (that also touch upon spiritual matters and mental health). I'll just say that this character means A Whole Bunch for me, and I gave up trying to reason why I am not scared or repulsed by him despite the sheer depth of comprehending his insanity. Though can a hard-core fan of FromSoft games truly be sane? Hehehe~ Also I love his appearance and I want to kiss his face, and I want to give him a motherly hug and wrap him in a comfy blankey

For Rom: Roughly the same things apply; a very important character, a lot of connection with dreams, spiritual experiences and mental health profile. In fact, I sort of kin this character. It is just hard to convey since within canon she is almost a blank canvas, yet I don't even feel connected with my portrayal of her specifically. It is just A Rom. There are only a few boundaries, such as strong sense of her being one of the students. But I love all the takes on her!

I picked interest in her almost instantly, but I had a dream about being her before I knew ANYTHING about her and only saw the design. She was, and is, such a blast to develop from my very first days into Bloodborne. She is as important for me as Micolash, just except that I do not have a crush on her. It'd feel too awkward... xD

• All the people I ship romantically with this character

For Micolash: Edgar, Damian, Laurence, Rom (not my version of her though, since mine is his sister), to an extent Kos and Wet Nurse (they are weird ones since they're gods)... Yeah, I think that's mostly it! I could like some others though? For example, @saint--adeline had a ship of Mico with Adeline and like... gfjjjfjyug cursed but it actually makes hella sense, you go girl xD

For Rom: Ebrietas, Julie/Yurie, Edgar, Micolash (see above), Damian, Adeline, Maria, Willem (cursed, I know), Patches

Naturally, I am not rotating all of these ships in my brain all the time, hahaha! I just like to explore different opportunities in fiction, and these are the ones I think of!

• My non-romantic OTP for this character

For Micolash: It is hard to choose one... I think him and Archibald work well! Archie probably would simp for Micolash, though, but I just don't see them becoming a couple. However, they would work together and get along juuust fine like two mad inventors, plus Archie is basically THE chief of Yahar'gul hunters. And one of the few mad lads that was loyal to Micolash genuinely until the end.

For Rom: Which one would not become a ship, hmmm... She sure has friends, but 'platonic OTP' is a very honorable status, you know! I think Caryll falls here the best; my particular version of Caryll distances from Byrgenwerth a bit soon, but in general they are the highest Insight scholars on the block (Micolash drools and hisses and cries and throws up from envy)

Honorable mention: My versions of Rom and Micolash themselves! They are siblings separated at birth that found each other thanks to Rom's intuition and unique devotion to finding her lost brother. They went though everything together, and were close and loyal to defending each other until the end. In fact, they are SO close that arguably none of their romantic ships could rival this bond. Very codependent family bond does that sometimes...

• My unpopular opinion about this character

For Micolash: Not an opinion, more like 'then do it yourself if you're so goddamn smart' moment. But I think he should have been involved in Research Hall (very likely as one of the doctors), and I think this is not explored often enough! Just like him being a necromancer and being able to teleport is not something I see addressed often enough. Basically my opinion is that there are more sides of him to simp for appreciate than just him being Weird Guy and a cult leader. The dude got TALENTS, okay? x)

For Rom: I prefer to think that her being intellectually disabled and, I quote, "childlike", was not a side-effect of ascension but natural traits for her in life! (Her title in Japanese original uses the word 'hakuchi' that is very directly a way to describe profound mental disability, as opposed to the more vague English word 'vacuous'). No, takes along the lines of Rom being a super genius so smart that she deserved eyes for that alone are cool, I am just very biased on my way of taking her title. In my case since she is a student, it is selective disability: academically smart but very helpless otherwise. Can see everything throw raw intuition but gets none of it. Can conduct incredibly complex research on the Universe but might not know how to button her shirt or count to ten. Along those lines!

I'll say though: the day someone makes Rom not a scholar and not a teacher but a secret third thing (Willem's baby daughter) is the day I will EAT that take /pos

• One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

For Micolash: I'd LOVE it if Micolash was a friendly NPC in the Nightmare for some time (basically temporary Doll, or maybe giving us helpful updates for Insight points), and then "betrayed" us by jumping in the Lake that'd serve as teleporter to the Lecture Building. x) Inspired by the cut idea for him in beta version where he DID do that. Him being a useful NPC is just my idea to lead up to it. Maybe he'd even make lamps conveniently not work in the Nightmare to force us to interact with h- lol yeah I just wish we got to interact with him more.

For Rom: A way to reveal Mensis Ritual without having to kill her and her babies. Just a split way of acting where if you kill her you get this, if you use roundabout way you get that... I just... I can't describe the feeling from that battle, it felt like bullying a child... even despite the fact that she has like 500 of her own children. But yeah, a FromSoft game that let's you be safe from anguish is not a FromSoft game...

• my OTP

For Micolash: Micoedgar! Edgar fell in LOVE with Micolash and he ruined his mission because he was GAY for him and he WILLINGLY gave Micolash his soul and he protects him because he is SIMP and I'll die on this hill!!!! But no, seriously, I feel like the two have the best potential. I largely characterized Edgar as someone not quite fitting with the Choir's limiting, toothless ways, and his brilliant and inquisitive mind simply found more of a kindred spirit in Micolash; the 'insane' and 'evil' guy that Choir told him to not trust and stop at all cost. And I think Micolash likewise appreciates Edgar; someone both smart (and brave) enough to listen to him and question things like him, but also an individualist enough to doubt him and concur his own thoughts if needed. Edgar refuses to wear a cage, now doesn't he? They are just equal, in the best way possible.

For Rom: I could not choose between Robrietas or Yurom/Julirom. Ever. Like yeah I know Rom has two hands (16 in her ascended form, actually), but balancing a human and a GO is hard... I think my preference will SLIGHTLY skew towards Rombrietas though, since Rom is destined to ascend anyway..

I concluded Ebrietas is a half-human herself (adult version of a celestial larva), so both Rom and Ebby would hit a very strong bond of being 'between' the mortal and the divine. Ebrietas also mourns Rom's petrified real body. I always felt like Ebrietas would much rather have Rom stay safe within the guidance of Stars and Moon, but Rom just.... HAD to go above and beyond, HAD to become a Spider (Amygdalae affiliation), HAD to secretly help Micolash... There is very deep emotion and conflict, and Ebrietas also having the Grinch heart moment; as a 'paleblood' Great One she nonetheless cries red bloody tears, as a sign of her feelings Rom 'sullying' her purity.. but also letting her touch upon her human side for the first time. Her theme and Rosmarinus both have 'why do you cry, fair maiden' bit but Rom altar has candles, so they must know WHY, right? But maybe it is because it was the first time Ebrietas cared about someone being lost to a ritual....

There are just so many layers to the two, I could go on all day....

• my cross over ship

For Micolash: I don't know... I have a suspicion a character from ER might fit, but I'll need to learn more about them before.

For Rom: I once had a weird fever dream where she met Gwynd0lin and they were talking about their experiences, and then Rom (still human-ish enough) had to run away carrying him in her arms when Suly appeared and beckoned Aldr1ch with the bell ggjhkgkyhj It is hard to describe but the emotions of both of them, and the impending horror, felt so real that I now physically can't unsee the two having a good chemistry. I've been imagining them interacting in a crossover a few times by now.

• a headcanon fact

Damn, I did not notice upon first reading the meme that it had this oxymoron, hahaha. Like... so, a headcanon OR a fact? I'll interpret it as 'a headcanon I am firm on' because I don't see any other way x)

For both: The description of the first Brain Fluid you find mentions a man that wanted to become a doctor, and so his sister volunteered to be his patient. I believe that the mentioned siblings HAD to be Micolash and Rom; Research Hall's connection with peeking into the Sea, the fact that eventually Research Hall does become Choir's base, the fact that this description is too random otherwise.....

You pick this Brain Fluid from a female head that is guarded by a guy, sure, but not only he is lower ranking Black Church doctor/hunter (that'd probably not do experiments on ascension, unlike White doctors)... But also, his internal name is 'lover npc'. So yeeee.

I'll give some pointer though: it could also refer to maybe Laurence and Adeline (Laurence does hold Eye Pendant and Healing Church WAS interested in internal eyes through water at its first days). Or maybe Micolash and Adeline? I just think these being Rom and Micolash comnects the things way better, Rom being the zero patient from whom that research started just... just completes things so well, and explains her fate more... That Rom was honored by Kos, when other patients turned to the Stars instead of the Sea or just went mad... argh.

Thank you for the ask, it was fun to reflect on so many things! These two are indeed my favs!

[sapphicscholar]

Hi! Don't know if you're still doing the ship ask thing, but if you are, could I ask about Ava and Deborah? (also do they have a ship name yet?)

Ooh thanks! And hmm I actually have no idea if there's a ship name, I think I've seen a couple variations floating around?

Ship It

What made you ship it?

-So I knew about the ship before I watched the show because it took me a while to get access to an HBO account to watch, which meant I went into the show knowing that it was a thing. And there were plenty of moments where I was like, oh! I totally see how people ship these two, even though I was just cruising along feeling invested in the show but not so invested in the ship to the point of thinking that I'd write for it or anything like that (lol @ summer me). But then I got to the funeral, which I had seen zero spoilers about. And Deborah fucking Vance strolled in looking like a vision of Carol, breaking every last one of her well-established, decades-old rules about forgiveness and funerals, all to be there for this woman who she technically had zero ties to anymore. So yeah that's the moment I sold my soul to the ship. (And upon rewatch, all the earlier moments that I had seen as intimate and fun and full of potential suddenly were just, like, SO MUCH MORE)

What are your favorite things about the ship?

-Oh man, it's got lots of hallmarks of the kind of ships I go hard for, and that asshole 4 asshole dynamic is just chef's kiss perfection. But, and I know I sound like a broken record here from other posts and answers I've given, I adore that they're allowed to be messy, imperfect humans and to have these complex, not straightforward, not even self-evident desires that, at least in a lot of TV and movies, women didn't really get to have unless they were bound up with their romances with men (or in the service of a kind of careerly ambition that had to be renounced for something like romance and family). I love that they want and want so hard. I love that they push each other, even when it's painful, and often doing it in the most antagonistic of ways. I love that they get under each other's skin just enough to leave some piece of themselves behind that keeps drawing them back to each other. And I love that they find this space of comedic creation where suddenly they're able to kind of look at each other as equals (after a long, hard-won battle). Anyway yeah I could go on for too long, so I'll stop there

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

-I don't think this is unpopular in this fandom per se, but in larger shipping fandoms I think it has become so: I don't care if they're ever "canon." Like yes, I'd kill for another kiss to have endless gifs of, I really would, BUT I also think that intimacy just suffuses so much of their dynamic as it is that I don't need anything more than that. When they fight, when they write, when they make each other laugh - to me those are all intimate, even erotic, so I'm just here, vibing hard, ready for whatever S2 throws at me!

[nightswithkookmin]

Hi Goldy, JK was bold in the past, around 2017-2019 (to me, gcf & rosebowl can be considered as ‘coming out’). But it seems he now prefers to stay closeted? E.g. he snatched JM’s hand in the Xylitol x BTS shoot, then looked at the camera. Holding hands is normal among members… a lot of his interactions with Jin, V and other members are more intimate than holding hands… his reaction makes me feel like he wants me to pretend I didn’t know…?

Sorry I've been a bit AWOL lately...

I'm busy being the man of my woman's dreams in a cis het anti black capitalist world

Fun times.

I saw that bit, uWu-ed and kept it pushing.

It's nothing new really. I think a few months back when I was out here screaming Jikook are toning down, acting super professional around the cameras yadda yadda people out here were looking at me like I'd lost my two delulu heads- but this segues into that theme for me and since I've exhausted the topic I don't know what else to add.

I've said before they've both been very conscious of the cameras within certain periods post October- again nothing new, they be like that every now and then every season every phase and the whys will always be up for debate in these ship streets- on that subject, I've read a lot of opinions yet I think like mine better and will stick to it. Thanks Kimberly of Delulu precinct. Walk along now. Lol.

Jimin was like that during the Coway behind the scene shoot too when he noticed the cameras and quickly elbowed Jk to draw him away from the gaze of the cameras.

I don't think it's because they stopped being 'bold' or want to pretend. It takes a lot of courage to even pretend or even perform the gay in front of the world and your peers. I think they are just awfully aware and conscious of the people they work with as well as corporation's growing awareness, intentions and interests in them. You just never know which saessang is moonlighting as a brand PA or marketing director for a company they are working with. You just never know who is watching especially whenever they have to work with these 'outsiders.'

Think of Dispatch. Were they not allies or business partners, they'd be careful around them too if they worked with them. Know what I mean?

Toning down and exercising caution is necessary sometimes. I don't know why some people think that's absurd or Tuktukkerish when I say stuff like that. Especially with the kind of reputation they have as a ship and just how commercially attractive that image is. It's common sense at this point if you ask me.

Jikook sells. Argue with the analytics. I don't know who thinks they don't. Must be the clowns and penguins. They sell period. BigHit knows this, BTS knows this, companies know this. We don't scream Jikook is a brand within a brand for no reason.

And a lot of the toning down in recent times has perhaps inadvertently mitigated that growing power and demand of them as a marketing resource- who knows, that could have as well been by design, intentionally instigated for obvious reasons which I argue is the case but don't mind me. I'm delusional, gay and apparently the man of my woman's dreams uWu. Gotta wear that pants in my relationship. Ayaya Hwaiting.

When you say he prefers to stay closested- I thought they are both closested already?? They both have never been fully out in our opinion. Yes our opinion because I feel we are like minded. Let's be delulu mates.

On the topic of closets, I want to save that for a separate post. What I can say though is they are both growing and maturing and learning and unlearning. Jungkook's desire to 'come out' or act reckless with his glass closet in my opinion stemmed from him placing more value on his personal happiness over other values perhaps because he was young and hadn't fully grasped the full and complex nature of happiness or understand the privilege he has as part of BTS.

We make decisions based on our values most times. It's how I make sense of their actions really. I'm more likely to assume things that are consistent with the values they each have expressed openly and tend to reject any theory that contradicts or is inconsistent with those values. A guy who values his career is less likely to act in a way that puts that career at risk. And I'm well aware their values evolve over time.

These days he has never quit as one of his mottos next to rather dead than cool- do you see the contradictions in those values? Rather dead means quitting life. Yet now he says never quit. Don't mind me. I'm in a grumpy mood.

But what I'm saying is, the desire to want to show the world who this person means to him is not fixed or a priority all the time. Now i think he values his career a lot more than before which means he is more likely to compromise and less likely to do things that may put that career in jeopardy.

Transferring that to his relationship, I don't expect him to be breaching the glass closet anytime soon. And if he do, it might be incidental and may carry with it consequences which I believe he is well aware and concious of now. Will that change? You bet. Again it depends a lot on what his values in a given moment are and which ones he prioritizes.

It's their relationship. They chose which aspects of it they want to share with the cameras. Some of it get written off as fanservice. Fair enough. But the nonfanservice passing moments has always been questionable- although I must say, I find all Jikook moments and interactions questionable lol.

It's just skinship. Holding hands I mean. Why would he be conscious of that right? II'vetalked about consequences and repercussions of their actions. Sometimes I think it's the off screen scolding that gets to him. The ones silently whispered at his back. I mean we saw his reaction when Jimin was getting scolded by the hyungs for sleeping late. He's talked about skipping sleep too if I recall correctly. Jimin is hyung and I know the hyungs expect him to know better and do better. I'd Imagine Jimin would equally scold JK if his actions reflected poorly on him too.

So why the hell would he not say anything to Jungkook for posting on his birthday when he hadn't posted at all for any hyung's??? Sigh.

It's sad his guards are back up- but it's for good reason I believe given the context of the situation.

I don't think dramatizing his dynamic with Jimin makes him bold. Nor does Jimin's propensity to over express himself with Jungkook mean he loves Jungkook more than. Both are extreme takes for me.

Nevertheless, I contrast that moment with a Tae Kook moment which is one of my favorite tuktukk moments. In this moment, JK is staring at Jimin, his whole body turned towards him. Tae notices the cameras and draws JK's attention to it. I think there are two such moments like that from the recent contents? I don't know I have to cross check.

Tae in that moment reminded me a lot of Jimin. Jimin does this too- play out their relationship infront of the cameras to the point one might say he likes to show off their bond- which is such a BTS thing to do too so no big deal. I mean they like to show off their bond and chemistry as Tae said a while back.

It's one thing for JK to hesitate to act with a member because of the cameras, it's another for him to act self conscious only after the fact.

And JK has always been him like this with Jimin as Jimin used to say- JK acts different with me off cameras than he is on camera. He had a history of suppressing himself around Jimin owing in part to his personality

He's talked about putting on a mask around people and in a recent interview Jimin have talked about pretending and acting one way when he's not- I mean I've ever talked about the boy being in love with the Maknae being a facade- one of many.

They have public personas which, from what BTS themselves say, looks slightly different or similar to what we see on screens- or that they've grown to be more like what we see on screens.

I guess what I'm getting at is that 'pretending' isn't exactly a new thing or out of the ordinary. Personally I'd say he's being conscious of his surroundings like Jimin was and not that he is 'pretending.' If you know what I mean.

If he's pretending he has good reason to I believe and we can only speculate on that- we can't know for sure why.

If Jikook is fanservice then there's no need for either of them to worry about the cameras picking up on their interactions or who's watching them.

What goes on in Tae's head? I wanna know.

I don't know where to direct this post because you didn't really ask a question.

I'm fine thanks for asking. I'm really fine. I'm thinking of joining Jimin in the gym at 3am to bench press and build some biceps to match my role in my relationship😒

And no I don't need any advice. Keep it.

This is going to be my attitude until we switch back😐

I'm gonna be a boyfriend from hell and a blogger from satan's ass.

Also I think I overshare💀

GOLDY

[hereliesanotherfic]

MtP: Little Tease

Ship: Albert James Moriarty x Reader Show: Yuukoku No Moriarty (Moriarty the Patriot) Rating: Pg 13?? Warnings: Teasing, flirting, suggestions Prompt: “I can’t sleep, can I stay here?”

______________________________________

You let out a soft yawn as you headed towards your living quarters in the manor, the Moriarty Manor to be exact. It was a long day of basic duties, but it never bothered you, quite the opposite- it was a pleasure working for the Moriarty men. William, Louis, and Albert were all incredibly generous, especially Albert. Over the couple years you have worked for them, he grew incredibly sweet towards you. He’d allow you lifts home in the carriage when out in the town, he’s aided you in the kitchen while you cooked or did the dishes, he allowed you some days off here and there just to rest. Not to say him or his brothers didn’t do this with other servants, but you and the other help noticed Albert did it most often for you.

But when he’s been alone with you, it’s been a bit more.

Moment One:

“Master Albert!” You exclaimed stepping out of the tailor shop, his carriage parked in front with him standing outside it.

“Hello (y/n),” he smiled softly. “I noticed you about town and wondered if you were finished? We could go home together,” he hummed, his voice as smooth as velvet. You choked down the frog in your throat, his choice of words made you sound more intimate with him in public which made your pulse race in embarrassment…or…excitement? Nevertheless, you nodded.

“That’d be nice! Thank you, kindly Master Albert!” You smiled, following his wave to come towards the carriage. The driver took your tailored dress and stowed it away and you stepped into the vehicle. Your heart bumped as you felt a light graze on your lower back as you hopped up. He was spotting you while you stepped inside, he probably didn’t mean to touch you. Albert stepped in after and took a seat besides you. It was a bit odd to sit next to him, but his presence was oddly comforting too.

“You know you do not have to call me Master, (y/n)” Albert spoke, his emerald eyes turning to contact yours.

“…I know you’ve said it before…though it feels too strange to say it while in town…”

“Do you think I have not noticed you still do not call me Albert at the manor as well?” You broke eye contact and bit your bottom lip, but he knew he got you before that. “I’d like to hear it.”

You slowly looked back up to him, confused by his request. “Wh-what?”

“ ‘Albert’,” he grinned slyly at you, closing the distance between you two a little bit. You heart started banging against your chest and you felt your cheeks flush a bit. The space in the carriage was small, the distance between you both was now small, and there was no way out from his eye contact. Albert tilted his head slightly. “Please?” Oh, he was absolutely trying to kill you with kindness (and your internal crush on him). You swallowed a bit heavy.

“…A-…Al..bert…” You said his name slowly, the foreign feeling of no honorifics was strange, but it also left a good tingly feeling on your tongue and in your heart. You saw his smile grow large and pure as he sat back into his seat properly.

“That made me happy, (y/n), thank you,” he said, staring out the window now. It took a moment for you to take your eyes off him. You didn’t think that’d make him so happy.

Moment Two:

“Preparing for our guests tonight (y/n?),” You glanced up from your cutting board to see Albert standing in the doorway to the kitchen. He was dressed in his clean white button-up and blue slacks. For a moment, you wondered where his jacket was, but the way his shirt hugged his figure, you were glad it was missing. You looked back down to the pepper you were cutting before you mind and eyes began to wander too far.

“Yes sir, there’s a lot to do before they arrive.”

“Ah, then I am sure I can be of assistance!” He stepped to the closet and pulled on a fresh apron.

“Master Albert, you don’t have to worry yourself with that, I have plenty of time.” He stepped over next to you on your left side as he finished tying the apron, pulling over another cutting board that was on the table.

“It’s no worry, if anything I am sure this will be enjoyable to cook with you.” Albert picked a clean knife from the rack, so thankfully he missed your light blush. “What else do we need to chop?”

“Uh, some onions are next, they are on the right side of me under the counter,” you stated, motioning your head to the side. Albert nodded as he stepped behind you and leaned down to reach for the onions. Suddenly, you felt his large, left hand placed firmly on your waist, which caused you to feel his balance shimmy. To catch himself and pull himself straight up again, he pulled up directly into you, his chest flush against your back, hand still on your waist, the bag of onions in this other hand. You could feel his breath just ghosting over your neck and ear, it was so light but it was there. “A-Albert?!” You quietly exclaimed in the moment, staring in random spots on the table to try to gain some sanity.

“I’m sorry (y/n),” Your body tensed as his breathy words breezed over your ear—when did his face get that close?! “I slipped, I’ll be more careful,” he finished. With that, he stood besides you again and began chopping onions like nothing happened.

--

It was small events like that, but your heart was about to explode every time. So at this late hour, the last person you expected to see outside your living quarter was Albert Moriarty, standing beside your door.

“M-master Albert?” You questioned, gaining his attention, he looked up from his thoughts and smiled to you softly.

“(Y/n)…” He hummed. Albert’s eyes glanced you from head to toe, and very subtly licked his bottom lip. You missed both of those. “I’d like to have a word with you, but I figured you’d be tired from the long day, so it’s best to speak inside.”

“Oh…okay, yah, sure,” You nodded quickly and stepped over to the door to unlock it. You didn’t think there was anything else to do, but the idea of Albert in your room sent you down a roller coaster of emotions. He requested to speak with you privately in your room, you were a person of no place to say no, even with the Moriarty generosity. You pushed the door open and stepped aside for him to walk in. Albert looked around your room, simply decorated, the queen bed was nicely made, curtains open and a soft lilac candle burning on a small desk you had. Closing the door, you slowly walked up to him while he was observing. “What can I do for you Master Albert?”

“ ‘Al-bert’,” he looked down to you, an amused smile on his lips. You eyes widened for a moment before glancing away again.

“I..I can’t get use to it sir, you’re of a nobility family, I’m just here to serve you no matter the generosity you share. I still have to respect you.”

“Respect isn’t solely based on a title, I know well that you hold my brothers and I in high regards,” the brunette confirmed, turning to fully face you. “However, I really want you to call me by my name (y/n).” Your cheeks flushed a light pink, hoping that the light of the candle in the room and low moonlight weren’t enough for him to see. He was only two feet away though…

“Is that what you came to talk to me about?” Your voice was hesitant, and he caught that. He let out a little chuckle.

“No, I understand how it will take some time to get use to that. I came for another reason.” You stared up at him, Albert was thriving on your full, undivided attention. He wanted your (e/c) to stare at him all the time, your voice to play its tune all the time, he had fallen for you a while ago, but you never seemed to notice the small attempts he made. Or, what he truly believes, was that the social hierarchy made you believe he couldn’t be attracted to someone ‘like you’. And the more he observed you, the more he knew he was right, and you were just afraid to openly fall for him. “I can’t sleep, can I stay here?”

Your heart immediately smashed against your chest at that request, and now you couldn’t stop your face from turning as red as a tomato. Did he really, I mean REALLY, just request to sleep in your room tonight? His green orbs continued to stare warmly at you, waiting for an answer. In truth, Albert was loving how red your cheeks were, how flustered such a simple request got you. He knew you liked him, but he wanted you to admit it for yourself and not be afraid of others stupid opinions.

“(Y/n?)?” Albert spoke, stepping slightly forward and tilting his head closer to you. The proximity snapped you out of it and you jumped back slightly.

“Ahh-hh,…um…isn’t there-..I mean…b-but there are…” Your brain tried to think of multiple reasons at once why he shouldn’t and scrambled them all out at the same time. Albert let out a small laugh.

“(Y/n), please relax. The guestrooms are taken by Moran and Fred right now, and I could never ask such a favor of another servant.” He stepped close to you, his hand coming up to cup your cheek and guide you to look at him. “You and I know each other well, you’ve worked here long. We trust each other. I’d prefer to share a room with someone like you.” His free hand reached up and brushed the hair away from your face as you stared at him in awe and disbelief. That hand joined in cupping you free cheek as the distance between you two grew smaller.

“Please?” Albert spoke barely above a whisper, his eyes half lidded as he stared into yours. You could feel his breath on your face as the gap got smaller. You internally panicked. Wherever this was going it couldn’t be good. It just couldn’t—he was a noble, the head of the Moriarty family! Sharing a room, no honorifics, aiding you, it couldn’t mean anything good for you. You had to cut it off…move…MOVE DAMMIT!

The voices screaming in your head all stopped the moment you felt his lips press to yours. Albert’s lips were incredibly soft, his fingers grazing your cheeks as he held you gently. It was light against you, his lips nicely encasing your top lip. He barely separated your lips as he turned his head slightly to the other side and kissed your bottom lip with a bit more firmness. The cologne he was wearing was aiding your high, it let out scents of soft sandalwood, some amber and something in it gave it a bit of a musky scent. For a kiss that only lasted under a minute, it felt like 10 years just went by before he pulled his lips off, hovering from your face at only two inches. It was then you realized you closed your eyes, because opening them to see Albert smiling softly sent you to heaven.

“Albert…” you barely whispered, staring at him in awe. The fact that he kissed you and broke so many social standings (again). Albert’s smile changed into this larger grin.

“You said it,” he gleamed, rubbing your cheek with his thumb, glancing at your lips thinking when to go back in for more. But he wanted to give you time to understand he was sincere.

“S-said what?”

“My name…” He rested his forehead against yours, staring lovingly into your (e/c) orbs. “I care too much about you to let something as trivial as social status stop me from telling you. And I am happy I was able to show you too.” You noticed Albert’s cheeks were dusty pink which made you smile a bit and giggle. “What?” He chuckled lowly.

“Nothing…” You muttered, glancing down at your feet. You would have never believed it if anyone else told you Albert cared for you. You still weren’t one hundred percent sure to believe it. But because of your strong love for him, you couldn’t fake the happiness you felt from his words. He was scaring away your insecurities and fears one action at a time. One word at time.

“Cute,” he hummed and kissed your forehead. “You can go change and prepare for bed, I’ll wait for you.” You felt one of his hands hold your own, his thumb rubbing small circles on your hand.

“Okay...but this stays between us for now and you leave before the others wake,” you stated, your cheeks still a bit pink from the kiss and confession. If he was truly to stay with you the night, you were worried about the rumors that could spread, but so long as he left before other servants woke, you figured it’d be fine.

“Of course, my darling,” Albert nodded and watched you turn to head towards the ladies room. He had been in his robe and prepared to sleep well before he arrived at your room, so all he had to was wait. When you returned out of your bathroom, Albert had already made himself comfortable in your bed, the sheets covering half of him and pulled open ready for you. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t nervous, you never thought you’d be sleeping with Albert, literally. You took a quiet, deep breath and walked over to the bed and set yourself into it, pulling the covers over you, blowing out the night candle right after. He began to lower into the bed and sheets and you followed in motion. Before you got too comfortable he spoke to you. “Good night, (y/n),” Albert’s voice hummed right next to you, causing a tingly feeling in your body.

“..Good night...Albert,” you replied softly, cheeks flushing and quickly turned on your side, your back facing him. You heard him chuckle and felt the bed shift as he got comfortable too. And when you woke up, you found his arms wrapped around your waist, your back to his chest and his soft breathing in your messy bed head hair. It was so comfortable...it was worth the risk of getting caught.

__________________________________ A/N: I had fun writing this, these gentlemen are adorable to write for! I’m just getting random inspiration off prompts right now, but if you have any ideas I may certainly write them too!

[monkeydluffy19920]

Hi, love your blog. I wanna ask what do you think is the biggest SaNa hint from Oda?

Hiya @xebecx and many thanks for the feedback, much appreciated <3

Frankly spoken it’s hard to to name just one big hint since personally I think Oda-sensei likes to sprinkle the hints around when it comes down to SaNami and also with many ships too (like said, it’s all about interpretation). Reason why I started to see potential on their ship was that it feels like their relationship has had pretty smooth development during these years. We have a starting point where Sanji immediately catches his eye on Nami but on Baratie arc. she is benefiting this situation so she could bail out for paying the restaurant bill which is ok for Sanji though (and he makes the guys pay *laughs*)

In Arlong Park the rest of the Strawhats learn about her past which explains lots of thing. Sanji is the only one who doesn’t buy Nami’s betrayal act and defends her when others are against her despite the fact that they were aquantainces at this point of the story.  After Arlong Park there has been some flirt between two of them although Nami still uses her charm to delegate tasks for Sanji and for her benefits.

Perhaps the first major development shipwise happens in Skypiea where Sanji’s sacrificial nature is revealed to Nami (since last time she was unconcious when he took the bullet for her and Luffy in Drum Kingdom so the captain could get her the doctor). Sanji did it so Nami and Usopp could escape safely and first time Nami actually hesitates to leave him all alone and later she shows gratitude for him (although at that point Sanji is unconcious now which is a nice parallel).

From shipper’s perspective, who would have thought that Totto Land and Zou arcs would include so much parallels that combine Nami and Sanji? First of all the wedding theme (this time just roles vice versa). Then she learns about his past from his relative, just like Sanji did back in Arlong Park. On top of that another Bellmere-like smile was revealed once he trew the farewell in Zou..

In my opinion the biggest development between them has happened when Nami and Sanji met in Totto Land since his departure. Those chapters offered so much tension and drama when Sanji first glared Nami angrily (hoping she would stop interrupting him) and then she later replies with a slap on face and teary eyes.

There are more detailed thoughts about emotional slaps in One Piece in this post but shortly said, Oda-sensei has used this element only on a few people throughout the series and it has always the purpose of showing that it things are serious and gone deep under the skin. Also after the things have calmed, in every slap there is a forgiveness and understanding and Nami’s slap isn’t exception.

Although Nami tends punch Sanji every once in a while (as a running gag) and for some reason Sanji is the only who get heart bumps, this slap was something serious and loaded with emotions. So, even without the shipping goggles, it’s obvious that she was hurt from to see her friend to act like sh*t without knowing the reasons because before this incident, she was the most powerful driving force in the retrieval mission. 

At one point it honestly felt like the aftermath might not get any panels and despite many fans (including me) was wishing there could be a moment similar  to @vichan91312‘s /@wiavi’s fanart where Sanji could show his vunerability and Nami would comfort him.

Oda-sensei wanted to yield the aftermath when it comes down to Nami’s and Sanji’s reconciliation although shipwise it would be more interesting that they would have an intimate moment and thought about the stuff. However, the way Oda-sensei decided to do it was more One Piece-stylish and maybe even more canon when it comes down to both of their characters. 

So, instead of forcing them to face alone face to face- conversations which could  have made both of them feel awkward,  Oda-sensei decided that Nami would show the forgiveness not so straightforward-style (since there were other around too) plus it would anyway be more characteristic for her not to admit anything romantic directly.

First approach was toned with comedic elements when she had this “never going to forgive you”- tsundere-ish stuff which Sanji interprets as a proposal (just like after what Nami told him before she battled Kalifa). Anime even extended more the “aftermath tension” this with that corridor conversation). but later Nami  welcomed him back with eyes filled with joy of reunion (and relief of her nakama being okay after that  merry go-round on flames arc).

The panel below was a nice gesture from Oda-sensei too (in addition to the bridal carry) because he could also have dealt this all with so called “out of panels”-kind of style which would have left things a bit vague.

Honestly, it’s hard to decide only 1 hint that could be a “huge ice breaker”/turning point  but perhaps this emotional slap and reconciliation are could turn into something bigger since along the way both Zou and Totto Land included many parallels to past arcs plus the more time has past, the more respectfully Nami is towards him. He is nowadays more than a fool to tool, he has become a good friend.

All in all, in the end we all shippers in the whole fandom should remember that eventually Oda-sensei is the one who decides the plot twists in canon and even if the ending wouldn’t turn as wanted it doesn’t mean anyone’s ship is ruined or deserves some mud on on it. Besides it’s easy to forget that even the author said that One Piece’s main goal is not romance but chasing dreams and the importance of friendships.

[emperorhulkling]

No hate here, where do you get Thorki from? I mean obviously they have a deep loving relationship, but I saw as clearly familial and platonic. More than normal familial and platonic relationships, but not romantic. Or did you just take that and think they would be a good ship? I'm afraid I sound like I'm being rude but I just don't get it sorry.

Hi @alexriptide , thank you for asking so nicely!

I‘ll probably lose followers for this, so I want to make one thing abundantly clear: I know that it seems like a strange ship at first, but I have no interest in them because of their brother/incest thing.

I ship it in the MCU since we see Loki feeling alien since his very first appearance. He feels like he doesn’t belong to his adopted family and has to live in the large, looming shadows of his parents. The only person he really connects to are Frigga and Thor. To me, it always felt like Loki was longing not only for his father‘s approval and his place in power, but for Thor as well. He struggles with never being able to compete with him but also with the need to be close. And I don’t know if you have ever watched the deleted scenes for Thor 1, but there are a lot of cut scenes that show a relationship that’s even more intimate than what we‘ve seen in the movies (https://youtu.be/InjYtLoXmkE). Especially 2:05-2:42. It might be my own feelings projected into scenes like this, but „give us a kiss“, „I love you“ and „like a king“ sounds like he wants to say so much more before he bites his tounge, afraid to tell what he‘s really feeling. Similarly, the scene in Ragnarok where Thor tells him that he thought that they would always stay together with Loki‘s heartbroken and longing expression just broke me.

Furthermore, he always teases Thor about earth as his weak point and Jane, which comes off incredibly jealous to me. As soon as Thor gives Jane any attention, Loki disputes it just to exclusively bask in Thor‘s attention.

Additionally, no one else understands them they the way they do each other. Neither Thor‘s friends (e.g. Banner) nor his partners (Jane) understand the struggles he‘s going through. And ultimately, Loki is the only character, next to Frigga, who Thor is ultimately done right by. Even though Loki did terrible things out of fear, loneliness, longing and desire he died for the person he loved most while protecting him. No one else in the MCU timeline ever cared for him enough to do so. In Endgame we see that Thor has been abandoned by everyone, his possible love interests and his friends. It‘s Loki‘s death in the end that actually broke him to a point of no return.

Moreover, I think their dynamic is teasing and very intimate, prone to touching and long lasting looks that would be inherently seen as romantic/sexual in a male/female dynamic. Just look at the scene in Dark World where Loki asks Thor for a dagger and Thor languidly looks him up and down. Or in Avengers 1, Thor coming close to Loki, clasping his neck with their faces a few centimetres apart asking to come home with him. He always hugs Loki while gripping his neck which is a very possessive action that he only repeats with one other character, Jane.

As a history major especially the scene in Thor 1 where Loki‘s parentage was revealed gave a lot more credibility to it in my opinion, as Odin says that he wanted to create an alliance when taking Loki. In Viking clans it wasn‘t unusual for a possible/intended partner for their offspring to grow up next to their intended. And with Loki‘s Jotun roots he is actually able to bear children. I think Odin may have intended a marriage.

Their characters also complement each other perfectly. Where Loki is sarcastic, pessimistic, Thor is there to smooth out those edges with his kindness and optimism. Thor is Loki‘s sign that there is still good worth fighting for while Loki proves to Loki that his optimism and kindness is not unfounded and to have Loki keep his head on his shoulders. In combination with their intimacy and the feelings I have described above, I just see them as two souls that are eternally intertwined and cannot wholly exist without each other. They are always pulling at each other to get closer and closer.

However, my favorite stories are fics where Loki has grown up in Jotunheim and there is none of the family history that ties them together and we can just see the characters and how they complement each other. A perfect example would be https://archiveofourown.org/works/14575956?view_full_work=true, if you‘re interested.

I hoped this helped you understand where I am coming from. If you‘ve got any more questions I‘d be delighted to answer them.

[whatthefuckisasweep]

Grif

For the character ask! Sorry this took me a while, I can't copy and paste on mobile, so I waited till I got on desktop tumblr! Thank you so much for asking about him, I could go on forever lol so this is gonna be fucking LONG. Please, anyone, feel free to ask about any other character, too. These are fun.

Why I like them: Grif is, for lack of a better word, complex. On one hand, it's like, okay he's just a funny comedy character. But on the other hand, he's like every all of my favorite archetypes of a character. He's crafty but stupid, selfish but selfless, antisocial but friendly, the straight man but the dramatic guy, he's snarky but oddly caring: the reluctant hero. It's kind of paradoxical, and I feel like not only do I relate to him, but I just really enjoy him overall. Whether it's because he's a good brother, being a complete dickbag because he doesn't know how to handle emotions, being a complete cynic on the battlefield, or being hyperactive and snappy, it's just... ah. He. Everything in his life just happens, and he has to deal with it, and yeah he'll kick and pout and probably eat everything but in the end, he's gonna choose his family and he cares deeply... even when he can't really show it.

Why I don’t: I see this a lot in myself too - the fact that he's impulsive and inherently negative when he speaks specifically. his words don't match his actions. He often doesn't hesitate when it comes to making negative comments because they are easier than saying something nice, but what his intentions are are completely different. in other words, he's a jerk, lol. Especially in season 15. I know people felt bad for him because he was partially right and went insane on Iris, but he lowkey deserved it. He said he hated his friends, and even his closest friend. He didn't want to admit that he was a good person just because he didn't want to help. yeah, it was valid, but he needs to learn how to make a case without fucking everyone emotionally and being so clammed up. >:/ sometimes it feels like he regresses in character, as much as he's matured. i guess that's realistic and just the writers making comedy, but also the way he handles Doc specifically irks me. so mean spirited for no reason, as funny as it is.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): OH MY GOD, okay, literally, every single episode with Grif starring as a main is fucking gold. I think for this I'm going to say, uh, This One Goes to Eleven. Even though it's not Grif-centric, it's the episode that's my favorite overall because it introduced me to RvB and made me like Grif right away, simply because he was attacked so much and I felt so bad for him. Another great one that sticks out right now in my sleep deprived state, is Grif does a Rescue. Augh. And the episode where Grif and Simmons get stuck underground in the caves.

Favorite season/movie: Season 8 (shotgun!!!, hyperactive ai grif), Season 11 (hanging in the canyon with simmons), Season 4 (the tank and blue simmons w/ grif), Season 5/6 (kai and rat's nest), Season 12/13 (the recruits, grif building the snowmen), Season 14 (backstory with simmons, Room Zero), Season 15 (you know why)

Favorite line: OK, don't make me choose. There are SO many that are good!!! I think one of my most favorite things that Grif says is "yoink!" It's so adorable! I also really enjoy "BLUEEE TEAAAAM SUCKKKKKS" with his epsilon double, the whole "invisible nap" scene, "what are we, on a date?"/"I can tell you what we weren't doing", "no one made me, I made me", "WERE GONNA FUCKING DIE" when charging at the meta, "that's a figure of speech?" [when carolina says im so hungry i could eat a horse is a figure of speech], "dexta grif he who shall not be messed with!"... I'm sure I'm missing a lot, he has SO many snarky funny lines, but these are some off the top of my head.

Favorite outfit: LOL THIS IS SUCH A FUNNY QUESTION BECAUSE THIS IS RVB. HAHAHA. Uh. Season 6 probably. I just like Halo 3 Graphics. Also s14 Room Zero because THEY DREW HIM FAT CANONICALLY. THANK YOU.

OTP: I'm with the majority of people in the fandom who like Grimmons! I think Grimmons is the only ship that I really vocally ship with my whole heart besides OC ships. I just very much enjoy their dynamic -- it's very angsty, dialogue full, intimate yet so unspoken. It's just a really good pair to write about and see the development of through canon. And, not to mention... season 15... hrk...

Brotp: I really REALLY want grif/tucker, grif/church, grif/locus BROTP. SO SO SO BAD. I've always seen grif and tucker as bros, grif and church are HILARIOUS together and we were ROBBED of more time together, and grif and locus are fucking adorable.

Head Canon: I have a lot of headcanons about Grif, but one of my favorite ones is that he has half-lidded eyes, like he's always sleepy. I also headcanon him as bisexual, though I think that is a popular headcanon!

Unpopular opinion: I dunno if I have super unpopular opinions about Grif... maybe that I think that his labryinth wasn't as bad as it seems at first? A lot of people seemed to think that though, yknow. Like if you look deeply into it, it's actually kinda fucked. But I feel like we should have gotten the Hawaii scene anyways. Hm. I also didn't like how they altered the canon so that Grif wasn't drafted. I think it does add something to his char that he chose to go, but I always really liked the aspect that Grif didn't control that, and yet he still did this on purpose. He was good on purpose.

A wish: A badass Grif carchase scene for the love of FUCK. We need to have him drive more stuff !!!!!!!!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: Have him betray the reds -- i think every other red has betrayed the team at some point. please god for the love of god dont do this to grif. it really adds and says something about his character that he doesn't ever betray his team.

5 words to best describe them: (eye roll) eh. fuck it.

My nickname for them: this isn't really my nickname, since I mostly just call him grif -- but 'gif'. It's cute, and my QPP came up with it! I also really like dex. augh

[recurring-polynya]

What’s your opinion on pre-canon Renruki?

I think that they already had a romantic or almost romantic relationship back in the Academy, maybe even back in Rukongai, and the reason it wasn’t explicit is because firstly it would have spoiled the endgame couples, and secondly it’s a shonen, so it’s implied.

I think they fooled around when they were orphans in Inuzuri. They grew up together, they were always together in their “teenage” years (however adolescence works for souls😅), I think it’s not impossible that they had their first experience, if just their first kiss and make out session, with each other. When they joined the Academy, they spent less time together due to their different courses, and I think Rukia’s sad expression when Renji leaves for the mission in the real world depicts that (along with worry for him, and maybe even jealousy for his achievements compared to hers). By then I think they were quite intimate, they fooled around sometimes (with the little time they had) and knew the other’s and their own feelings, but never said anything like “I love you”, or talked seriously about the depth of their relationship. If they were “just friends”, as some antis like to claim, they wouldn’t have been so heartbroken, have so many regrets and felt so guilty during their separation. And why that separation in the first place? It’s not a matter of class difference, because Rukia did talk to people of inferior status, like her Squad mates. What’s actually forbidden to people from different classes is relationships. If Renruki was just a friendship, there would have been no problem, but their bond was beyond that. Rukia wanted Renji to tell her to stay with him, but his feelings of inferiority and belief that Rukia deserved better (maybe even better than him) prevented him to do it. Their separation doesn’t feel like an end to a friendship to me, it feels like a breakup. They avoided each other because it hurt so much, and they couldn’t bear to have any relationship other than a romantic one, which was impossible once she became a Kuchiki.

After the Soul Society arc, they got back together. They were physically too comfortable around each other to be just friends, like when he basically hugged her to encourage her to go back to Soul Society when Orihime is kidnapped (and maybe he was also comforting her), or when, during the fight with the Fullbringers, he casually placed her head resting on his thigh. By then they were secretly dating, in my opinion. In the last arc they were always together, it’s so easy imagining them as a couple.

What do you think? Is my interpretation far fetched? I’d like to hear your theories about their feelings, when they blossomed, when they confessed, if they had something going on during their Academy years…

Thank you if you decide to answer!🤍

Well, as you say, Bleach is a shounen, and also I don’t think Kubo was particularly interested in including romance in the story, so I don’t think there is a correct or incorrect interpretation. It’s left to the reader to imagine what they like. I don’t think “spoiling the endgame” has anything to do with anything.

I don’t think your interpretation is “too far-fetched,” although I don’t happen to agree with it. There’s very little to go on in canon, people can fill in the gaps in whatever way makes them happy/makes sense to them. I have exactly 0 interest in arguing with people on the internet about stuff like this. I enjoy reading fanfiction that has wildly different interpretations from my own, I generally love to hear a variety of ideas, although I generally prefer the format of a narrative over Tumblr posts (funny, since I do seem to write a lot of them).

Anyway, here are a bunch of opinions. This is way, way too long, so I'm gonna throw it under a cut.

That being said, you have some really amatonormative ideas in there that I do take issue with. Friendships absolutely can be as deep and important as romantic relationships. I categorically reject the idea that a romantic bond is stronger than a friendship one or that acts of physical affection necessarily imply a romantic relationship. I actually have no beef at all with people who want to read Rukia and Renji’s story as a very strong friendship. I do think it was still reasonable for Renji to avoid her during their separation, even if his goal wasn’t romance. He wanted to see her live a better life, and didn’t want to drag her down. Yeah, sure, if he just wanted to be a casual workplace friend, he probably could have joined Squad 13 and seen her once in a while. But, especially in the early days, it would have been a bad look for Rukia to continue socializing with people deeply below her station, and I feel in my heart that Byakuya would have forbidden her from seeing Renji if he found out she was hanging out with someone from her Inuzuri days, even if it was just casual. Yeah, there exist people who say Rukia and Renji are "just friends" for the sake of other preferred ships, but also, like, so what? Who cares? That’s a lot better than making Renji out to be a bad person or trashing his character. To be honest, I am generally happy to read a fanfic that had some other Renji or Rukia pairing if it actually contained some solid Renruki best friend content (I have found a few 369 fics that do this, and maybe also in the little bit of RenIchi content I have read, so, uh, good job, my gays. This is sometimes touched on in ByaRen fics, but usually not as much as I want, althought I also tend to hold these to a high bar, because if I have to deal with Byakuya in my fanfics, they should have to deal with the Rukia-Renji friendship 😂)

Anyway, you asked for my interpretation, so here it is . These are all just, like, my opinions, man:

Life in Inuzuri just really, really, really sucks, and Rukia and Renji both have a lot of trauma and emotional hang-ups from that time. I think they forged a deep emotional connection during this time that was probably a little too codependent to actually be healthy. They had no models of healthy families or relationships. I also think they were incredibly close to Fujimaru, Kosaburou, and Mameji, and that even if they wanted to have a romantic relationship, they wouldn’t have, at the risk of ruining the more important bonds of the larger group.

In my fanfic, in their last days in Inuzuri, I do have them fool around for a brief period. It coincides with the deterioration of the bond with their last surviving friend, leading to his death. I did this for trauma reasons, because that’s how writers are.

“Communication” is probably the most important theme in my writing, and a thing I bring up all the time is that young Rukia and Renji had a thousand ways of communicating survival-based things between each other, and 0 ways of communicating how they felt about each other.

I did a post on this recently, but their whole gang was incredibly powerless in Inuzuri. They lived on the fringes of society and stole scraps to survive. I think that their number one duty to one another was to survive. In the anime, Rukia swears that she will never leave Inuzuri, that she will always stay with her friends. I think the reason she does an about-face is not just because their friends are gone, but because she realizes that she will lose Renji next, and the only way to prevent that is for both of them to get stronger. Neither of them actually wants to become a soul reaper. They do it for each other.

I think that Renji would have remained in Inuzuri and tried to make a life as best they could, but Rukia knew this was futile, and where Rukia goes, Renji follows.

I think they purposely maintained distance at the Academy. Just as in Inuzuri, their primary duty to one another is to survive and thrive. They were rejected and mocked for their low origins, and hanging out together would have made this worse. I think it hurt Rukia that Renji made new friends, but on the other hand, they were exactly the sort of people who would help him get a leg up in the Gotei. Rukia’s Academy days were very painful because she saw Renji succeeding, just as she wanted, but leaving her behind in the process. Conversely, Renji got super focused on doing well, with the idea that he could pull Rukia up behind him, except for the part where he never actually told her that.

I feel like I’m in the minority here, but so much fanfic focuses on Rukia and/or Renji being “wrong” in the scene where he tells her to go to the Kuchiki, but I disagree! Everything they have done is in order to get to a better life! It is Renji’s duty to encourage her to leave him behind. He doesn’t want to be an anchor holding her down. Likewise, Rukia knows that if she doesn’t go, she’s just gonna be a burden on him. Their relationship has always been about each of them surviving separately over having happiness together. Up to now, they’ve always managed to find each other again, although this kinda looks like it might be it for them. Do these kids need to go to therapy? Yes! Did they do anything wrong? No!

I think about this a lot, but even if Rukia had turned down the adoption (which… I’m not actually sure she could have), even the offer would have ruined their relationship. Imagine that Renji asks her to stay, and she does. Maybe they even get together at this point. Every rough patch, every time there’s money troubles, this spectre of “Rukia could have been a Kuchiki” is going to hang over them. In fiction, there is often an idea of sacrifice being a one-time romantic gesture, but in my real life experience, this sort of thing hangs around like an unwanted ghost. I can, in fact, envision a scenario where this is exactly how Aizen manages to get his hooks in Renji, by offering Rukia an unseated spot in Squad 5, even though she “isn’t really good enough to deserve it” and “taking care of them.”

I am really fascinated with Rukia’s crush on Kaien/Miyako. Bold proclamation here, but I think there is something developmentally healthy about young people having crushes on the older people in their lives, provided that said older people treat them with respect and dignity and don’t take advantage of it in any way. Crushes are, by their nature of being unreciprocated, a safe way for young folks to imagine the sort of people and relationships they want to have in their lives. I headcanon Rukia as bisexual, and maybe also a little bit genderfluid, and she had these two extremely cool people in her life, whom she maybe wanted to be and maybe wanted to kiss and maybe to have a marriage like that some day. I… like to think that their role in her life healed some of her trauma before their death caused even more.

Fully into headcanons now, but I like to think that Renji had a parallel experience, with, of all people, Ikkaku and Yumichika. Like him, they came from the ass-end of Rukongai, but they stuck together instead of bowing to the social mores of the Seireitei. It is critical to note that they were able to do this through strength. This is literally not a thing that Renji and Rukia could have done, but at the same time, Renji sees this as the kind of relationship he wants to have with a partner. He doesn’t want to look after Rukia and protect her, he wants to fight back-to-back with her and then make out afterwards. He’s still convinced that he needs to go through the proper class channels to see Rukia again, but without their influence, I don’t think he ever would have been able to say “fuck it” and turn on his captain during the Soul Society Arc.

Meeting Ichigo and dealing with his unreasonable need to protect everyone he cares about, personally, was also a huge blow to Rukia and Renji’s “I cannot allow the other person to take any risks for my sake” hang-up. Ichigo has his own traumas, which are entirely different from Renruki’s, but the one thing he had was growing up in a loving family. (Isshin has his problems, but I feel strongly that he always made his kids feel like his love was unconditional). I’m not saying that making friends with a shounen protagonist is a good replacement for therapy, but it does have healing properties.

Entirely off-topic, but I feel like Ichigo is incredibly selfish in the way of Terry Pratchett’s witches: “All witches are selfish, the Queen had said. But Tiffany’s Third Thoughts said: Then turn selfishness into a weapon! Make all things yours! Make other lives and dreams and hopes yours! Protect them! Save them! Bring them into the sheepfold! Walk the gale for them! Keep away the wolf! My dreams! My brother! My family! My land! My world! How dare you try to take these things, because they are mine!

Where were we? Oh, yeah. I honestly think that it is unknowable when in canon Rukia and Renji confessed. I already covered this pretty thoroughly in this post. I hate the idea that they were secretly dating. Renji worked incredibly hard to get his post and I think that both his job and Byakuya’s respect are very important to him. I do not think he would put either of those things at risk like that, nor would Rukia want him to. I tend to prefer a slow-burn approached, and I honestly think they got together during the 17-mo timeskip at the earliest, and more likely post-canon entirely, although I think them confessing in the Royal Realm is the spiciest possible outcome, so that’s what most of my fanfic cleaves to.

[hopefulobjectmiracle]

ships: benvi, daxton, fabiola x eve!

hello! sorry for taking so long to get to this hehe (also thanks for sending NHIE in! i very rarely get asks about other shows so this was a nice surprise 🥰) 

this is under the cut bc it got long!!

benvi - ship it :)

1. What made you ship it?

the beautiful progression from insults and banter to forming a tentative friendship when they realize that they actually enjoy each other’s company to a romantic relationship!! i’ve always been a sucker for enemies to lovers when it’s well executed, and benvi’s s1 arc is an absolutely perfect example of this trope being done right. 

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

they have the best chemistry, their banter is Superior, they’re secretly best friends despite pretending to hate each other, they embody the superior academic rivals to lovers trope (with the bonus fact that they’ve been rivals since childhood), nalini clearly loves ben as much as devi does, ben was able to get through to devi regarding her father’s ashes bc he knows her better than anyone, he drove her to malibu despite not having a license, and she inspired him to stand up to his family and tell them into spending more time other. in general, they push each other to be better and happier people and i love that for them.

also...not to project myself onto them or anything but they do remind me of my own relationship with someone i knew in high school. it’s just so much fun to see that dynamic reflected onscreen and it gives me so much nostalgia watching them do some of the exact same shit that i pulled back then 😂

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

my unpopular opinion is that i didn’t mind their s2 storyline. a lot of ben/benvi fans hated it, but for the most part i enjoyed s2. i just didn’t like ben’s relationship with aneesa, lol. it felt like every annoying aspect of a stereotypical high school couple all wrapped into one.

daxton - don't ship (at all)

1. Why don’t you ship it?

for starters, there’s the age gap between maitreyi and darren. and while that’s one of my biggest issues with the ship, i also have several other reasons to dislike them together: 

they fall under the tired and cliche trope of 'popular guy falls for the nerd'

paxton has never really seemed fully into her (i wrote this meta about how him going to the dance with her isn't the big romantic gesture that devi/the fandom thinks it is), and how he almost seems reluctant to be with her.

i also believe that there's always going to be this weird power imbalance between them, with both of them idolizing the other for reasons that aren't quite accurate. they don’t know each other well enough and have built up an image of the other in their mind. what happens when the image comes crashing down? 

i generally believe that devi deserves better than paxton bc he disrespected her and treated her pretty badly throughout the whole series, the most recent example being when he rejected her publicly and humiliated her.

ig i just don’t like their general dynamic and i find them to be pretty incompatible, even for a high school relationship. 

2. What would have made you like it?

oh idk maybe if paxton wasn't played by a fucking 30-year-old?? sorry ahah that sounds a bit rude, and i probably shouldn't blame darren barnet for it bc i don't know if he was aware that he was going to be staring opposite actual teenagers instead of the regular 25-year-olds playing teenagers, but still - the age gap between darren and maitreyi makes me so, so uncomfortable.

now, the age gap isn’t the only thing, though - i have several other reasons to dislike daxton, as listed above...buuut the age gap only makes all of the above worse. i might’ve been able to go easier on paxton or feel more invested in analyzing the ship if paxton’s actor was age appropriate, but bc of the age gap, i can barely watch intimate scenes between the two of them knowing that maitreyi was so young and darren was pushing 30. i just...ugh 🥴 

3. Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

yeah, i like their friendship. and i enjoyed paxton as an individual in season 2. i guess i’m also okay with them having a short relationship in s3 if it means that devi gets more individual development out of it. 

fabiola x eve - don’t ship 

1. Why don’t you ship it?

they were so underdeveloped!! they spent the entire season on one silly storyline that could've been wrapped up in two or three eps and then called it representation. i don’t have anything truly against the ship but there’s also not much there to like. i also found eve’s friends really annoying and hated how they pressured fabiola to confirm to their tastes.

2. What would have made you like it?

if they’d gotten more screentime and if eve’s actress was a little less wooden. that’s basically it.

3. Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

i did like their final scene where they were crowned the queens of the dance and fabiola admits that she loves eve. it was also nice to see that eve didn’t want fabiola to fit in with her friends and that she accepted her gf’s interests.

[btsandvmin]

Ask: Reply - 2021.03.30

Yet another batch of interesting questions from you all. I really appriciate how much you seem to value my thoughts and opinions, so thank you for interacting and investing your time into my blog, it means a lot. I got to hear from some of you that you felt my last post was very warm and even comforting, and honestly those are such sweet compliments. Thank you so much! <3

And before we start, just to let you know, I will answer asks about Let’s BTS on KBS in a different post. Because I got a lot of them, and I haven’t seen the show in it’s full yet. But... VMIN~~!!! 💜

You can check the topics below to see if anything interests you (no one is going to force you to read all of it unless you want to). There will be some possibly controversial topics and opinions in this post. Also, remember that I while I do put effort into answering asks, they generally will be less detailed and nuanced than a full post. Most of the time it’s a stream of thoughts with some added references if needed. Thank you all for being nice and understanding, it means a lot.

Topics:

Ask 1 - Did you catch some change in Jimin over time? Ask 2 - Vmin’s relationship becoming more instense Ask 3 - Ji/kook and their Tokyo trip Ask 4 - Idols dating members of the same group Ask 5 & 6 -  Replies to earlier ask about not enjoying a pair because of shipping Ask 7 - Tae wanting to have children and him being together with someone of the same sex Ask 8 -  Going down the rabbit hole, micromoments and shipping vs believing Ask 9 - Vmin cuddling and grabbing ass Ask 10 - Vmin vs Ji/kook being less/more vocal and how did I survive being a Vmin shipper for so long? Ask 11 - Choosing what asks to answer (and a bunch of nice things) Ask 12 - This ask just makes me happy

Ask 1 - Did you catch some change in Jimin over time?

Hi and thank you, that’s very sweet of you. :3 As for being a Vminie it’s ok if you don’t want to proclaim yourself as one, it’s totally fine just being curious and coming to me with questions anyways. But even so, if you do feel like a Vminie (and even if you don’t) welcome and I hope you’ll feel comfortable in the Vmin community.

A lot of people who get into RP shipping or maybe even believing, are like you not always into shipping before falling for a BTS ship. I think it can often lead to a lot of confusion actually. Being drawn into a shipping community that is kind of unsure of if it’s even shipping or beyond shipping a lot of the time is also sometimes hard to navigate. I think BTS being BTS and the incredible bonds they share makes it very inviting and leads to a lot of non-shippers getting curious. Maybe even more so if BTS is your first Idol group. (Correct me if I’m wrong, because I am myself not one of these people so I am just guessing.) I find people’s reasons for shipping and being attracted to different ships very interesting, but honesly all BTS ships are some of the most wholesome ones I’ve seen. The love these 7 boys have for each other is truly remarkable.

I’ve seen a change in both Jimin and Tae as individuals and of course in their relationship and dynamic as well. Growing up will do that of course, and they have been through a lot, alone and together. We know like Tae said that Jimin used to be very different, and that around Danger he started to feel more comfortable being himself. Jimin too has said he used to be “weird” and that he has started to relax more with time. I think Jimin has gradually become more and more comfortable in his own skin and with how to be as a member of BTS. I think this change is of course something gradual but that sometimes situations can make them “grow faster” due to being reflective or being exposed to a new problem, for example not being able to perform now due to Corona or how the Love yourself message really resonated and made the members think about their own lives as well. What I see is Jimin trying less to be cool and being softer and getting more relaxed in general, so it’s not surprising this reflects in his relationships with other members as well.

As for how Vmin changed I think most of us saw a shift around 2016, and we know they changed a lot when the dumpling incident happened. I think they got softer and most of all I think they realized the importance of communicating. How they need to talk and be open with each other and that they put in effort to make their relationship improve. They have both talked about this, and I think it’s something that lead to a big change in how they behave with each other. I feel we have seen them becoming more attentive, understanding and patient with each other because they put in the effort to have a better relationship.

As for Jimin being cutely shy I definitely think we saw that a lot during 2016-2018 but that we still see it from time to time. I still personally suspect it has more to do with normalizing behavior for the camera than Jimin being more comfortable and relaxed doing those things with Tae in general. I also think we see times when Jimin definitely seem to get shy or in some sense bothered with Taehyung’s actions towards him (I wrote this before Let’s BTS but that’s yet another example of Tae being forward and it making Jimin a bit nervous.). So again, while I do see this change in Jimin seemingly being more relaxed now, I think when it comes to Vmin think it depends more on situation and is something that they have slowly changed over time. I’ve talked about this in my post  Vmin – Pushing the boundaries and also about the camera possibly being a factor in  Vmin - Push and Pull. 

I think we have gotten Vmin moments of all kinds over the years, and that’s why the shift with many things seems to be gradual and also not 100% consistant. But it also makes sense for any relationship to stabalize when they’ve been friends for so long and finally grown into adults. They’ve both become more comfortable with themselves and together. (Though there are still some very odd behaviors remaining if you ask me). So yeah, I’ve seen Jimin change and I am happy he seems more comfortable now. Vmin has changed too, and though they still have their stiff and odd moments and might even be careful about how they come across they definitely show a lot of things now that they didn’t before. And on that note let’s get to the next ask...

Ask 2 - Vmin’s relationship becoming more instense

Yeah, I kind of agree. They just seem to do more and more of a lot of very intimate looking things. And often it seems they increase these behaviors over time as they get more comfortable doing them, like hand holding for example. Again, I’ve spoken about this many times before as in my posts mentioned in the above ask. For me I kind of think Tae has always been very intense, but he’s just expanded and become more diverse in how he expresses it, if that makes sense? For example the songs, or them deciding to call each other soulmates (though Tae tried and was denied before the 2017 post-it) or simply pointing out Jimin as special are things that has happened several times but become more obvious and sometimes even blunt. They definitely seem a lot more intimate in general as well. I would say that kind of goes for most of the group though, as I am sure knowing each other for so long and slowly changing as individuals will affect their group dynamics as well. They all seem a bit more touchy and comfortable with affection now (I mean just compare Namjoon initiating touch early years to now.). Vmin has definitely increased a lot of their very affectionate and even romantic looking moments, even though I do think they had early examples as well. Mostly I feel they got softer, more attentive and understanding towards each other and has increased some particular behaviors that might seem almost couple like (though not always exclusively with only´each other).

As for people thinking Vmin hate each other... I just don’t understand how you could come to this conclusion about any of the boys. Fine if you think they aren’t as close as they want to come across, but hating and even just disliking someone for so long and hiding it isn’t an easy task. In particular these antis also seem to forget that Tae is very honest and straight forward. He’s called out bs from fans and his company many times... And yet he would happily play along with pretending to love the members and even going out of his way to show it in ridiculously sweet ways? Also why even like someone or a group that can lie to this extent? Then you wouldn’t really know them or what to trust at all, so why just pick the moments you think are genuine to stick to?

This idea that Vmin would hate each other is just weird to me... I mean it does show Vmin has a contradicting behavior and weird enough moments for antis to pick up on. Though I do think antis would twist any moments regardless if Vmin seemed totally fine or not. For me it’s clear you can’t fake feelings and statements and reactions so consistantly, and with a lot of small almost private or not very obvious moments, for so long. Honestly the only way Vmin is played up is if the feelings are there but they run with it a bit more... But even that doesn’t make sense because things like not talking about 4 o’clock until now or them themselves choosing the label soulmates and Jimin even being shy about it or even denying the Christmas song happened. These things come from Tae himself, in defiance almost, and thus I think it would be weird to have them play up some things but downplay others. Especially from a person like Tae who seems to want to be as honest as possible and sometimes even blurt out things he maybe shouldn’t.

Anyways, I don’t think we need to linger on this topic much more, because honestly no matter what Vmin’s relationship is it should be clear they mean a lot to each other and their feelings of love for each other are genuine and impossible to fake.

Ask 3 - Ji/kook and their Tokyo trip

First of all I am sorry you got insulted over just being curious and asking questions. Having an open dialogue and not shutting out arguments, questions or ideas never does any good (as long as it’s not done in a toxic/hateful way). I don’t particularly like speaking of other ships myself, but getting agressive or dissmissive is not the way to go.

First I would say I don’t think the trip has to have anything to do with Vmin’s bond... Not everything is going to have to be explained away as some grand scheme. Ji/kook going on a trip or Jimin going on a trip with other friends (like when he went to Paris/Hawaii/Russia) is nothing weird and shouldn’t be seen as weird just because Ji/kook are also in the same group and obviously close enough to enjoy each other’s company. (You might think Vmin in comparison not going on a trip is weird, but that’s a different discussion.) just going somewhere together does not make a ship more real and not going does also not have to mean anything.

BTW this is Vmin just a couple of weeks after Ji/kook got back from their trip, so I think it’s safe to say Tae had no problem with it. We really need to remember that likely no matter what ship would be real (if any of course) the memebrs are ok with it.

Actually just watch the whole segment if you haven’t because it’s one of the MUST SEE moments from BTS.

If you are sensitive or can’t read about other ships without getting triggered I suggest skipping to the next ask as I will now talk some about ji/kook. But I also want to remind you all that the most likely scenario is still no ship at all being real, and we should all be careful with trusting in narratives too much in general.

I don’t want to go into too much detail, because it’s not the focus of my blog. But the short story is that Ji/kook went to Tokyo together privately. They went there during a break in late october 2017 and were spotted by fans and then JK also released a travel vlog of the whole thing. The main narrative is that this was during a time Ji/kook was being normalized and working towards a glass closet with the help of Big Hit and that the GCF video was romantic. Because of the song and because of the artist being LGBT+ it was a message from JK about him and Jimin. There was also pictures of them shopping jewelry and there was a theory going around they bought matching rings and that the whole trip was a way to celebrate their relationship and again possibly also start working towards some kind of coming out. The trip is seen as an important turning point in most Ji/kook narratives and honestly until now I do think this is one of their most legit “moments” that isn’t just based on speculation.

(Also it was said that Jimin wanted to go with Tae as well, but it really doesn’t change anything even if it was about this particular trip or just in general. Ji/kook going alone is still nothing weird on it’s own.)

I would suggest taking anything from any shipper with a grain of salt though. I mean saying Ji/kook got engaged while in Tokyo and even talked about it/hinted at it/are open with their relationship to begin with would basically mean Ji/kook being together is a known fact by many at Big Hit. If that’s the case they don’t seem very careful or bothered at all by the possibility of their relationship ruining their own and the group’s career. Personally I see this as kind of unlikely myself, as I would think any LGBT+ idol would at least be a bit careful or discreet, and maybe even more so when fans are as invasive and investigative as some can be. 

We also need to remember that while shipping communities are huge, the non-shipper fans, other shippers and even homophobic fans will always be a very large group as well. They will likely always outnumber “supporters” of a particular ship. No matter what ship we talk about, coming out would be difficult and lead to a massive loss in fans (and money). Not to mention the psychological effects it could have on the ones involved. I don’t see how the members or Big Hit would be careless with it if that was the case. 

I won’t say ji/kook being together is impossible, because as I always say we don��t know enough about them or how a relationship would look like or be handled. I just personally don’t think many theories or narratives from ji/kookers makes sense, and them getting engaged and being open about it is one of these things. (This is also why I don’t think the members joking about a real ship looking like a couple seems like a likely idea.)

Taehyung and Jimin used to share hotel rooms all the time, and we know members showered together or that Tae posted a photo of Jimin in the bath. Having many moments like this I think it would take a lot to make one ship in particular stand out. Once again, even for Vmin the stuff that actually makes me question them are usually not the intimate things they do or the individual moments we get to see, but instead the context and possibly weird behaviors they have showed over time (and the songs). 

I know more about Vmin, and I find them more questionable, but like I have said I still do understand why people ship other ships. I even find some theories very interesting, like even for ships like Tae x Hobi, there are stuff to find that make you wonder. But that’s the thing, all shippers can do this. So once again I urge you to remain sceptical but open, and let people ship what they want while we focus on enjoying Vmin.

I hope I answered your questions, and that the conversations about this topic remain civil. I am sorry for bringing up another ship, I just felt talking about this to this anon was the nice thing to do.

Ask 4 - Idols dating members of the same group

Hi and thanks for your ask. For me this isn’t really some big revelation, though I haven’t seen her original statement and as you say maybe it was just misunderstood. But still, I am pretty sure there are LGBT+ idols that date, and that it’s very possible there are inter group relationships of different kinds. I mean we legit have an example of a group (K-Population) that disbanded because one member cheated on another member he was in a relationship with with a third male idol. So we don’t know how common it would be, but it’s definitely not impossible.

However we can conclude from statistics alone that many idols will be LGBT+, and that all of them would be living in celibate is just not realistic. Being LGBT+ in any country is a risk, but of course in a country like South Korea that risk is a lot higher. There are still people who are openly LGBT+ in Korea, and even a few examples (though very rare) in the entertainment industry. But we have to remember queer people and queer relationships have always excisted under very difficult conditions. But they decided to be together despite the risks. Not saying we can compare, but just that we need to realize that something being difficult or even forbidden doesn’t mean it can’t happen anyway.

So, we can guess some idols, despite the risk, would still choose to be together/sleep around etc. We also know any relationship is a risk for an idol, or that they do stuff that are illegal etc. as well, so again, risk doesn’t have to equal something can’t happen anyway.

If anything what I find interesting here is that people do seem to know about some idols being LGBT+ or in relationships but it still remains mostly hidden. Unless she is talking about only people very close to her or her own group. Again, I think idols would be careful with any relationship, but obviously people in the industry know to be discreet about it to some level. But yeah, I think looking at any entertainment industry and being a fan of idol culture for a long time this feels very natural and something I would guess happens at least from time to time. I’ve seen other interviews with ex trainees etc. as well and it does seem a lot of rumors float around, but that often managers/staff find out stuff even before other members of the same group does. However, I do think we also have to remember BTS aren’t going to be exactly like all other groups, and likely has a lot of other aspects we need to take into consideration when speculating. Thanks again for the ask and info. :)

Ask 5 and 6 - Replies to earlier ask about not enjoying a pair because of shipping

Hi and thank you both for sharing. These are two replies to “ Ask 5 - Not enjoying a bond because of it’s shippers” from the post Ask: Reply - 2021.03.25. 

Firts thanks for liking my posts, and indeed we should remember that romantic love is not automatically superior. Vmin just being Vmin is enough no matter their relationship status. We know their bond is special to them, and any partner of theirs would know it too and have to be fine with it.

I get feeling like “I don’t want those toxic people to be right” though... It happens to me too and it especially annoys me because even if any of the big ships are real that doesn’t mean all of their toxic theories and narratives are. But it feels like them being right about a ship being real would include the stuff they got wrong as well. So yeah, it’s not always easy to sepparate the two sides of shippers being toxic and having toxic narratives from the possibility of their ship being real. When it affects the way you personally enjoy a dynamic it has gone quite far though, and hopefully you might in time be able to sepparate the ship from the shipping narratives.

I know there are many people who feel this way and who also feel very bad about feeling this way. Sadly I really think this is just very common psychology that might be difficult to avoid once you get emotionally invested. Feeling bad I think is a very good sign actually, because you are aware you shouldn’t look down on or get annoyed with other members because of shipping. At least you aknowlegde and admit to it, which means you can try to work against it. Avoiding toxic places and people is a good start. I hope you can get to enjoy all of BTS’s bonds and work towards not having to feel bad. I know it’s not easy, but again, you should give credit to yourself for at least being aware and trying.

Again, I think getting involved with ships, or even just being a fan of real people, can come with a lot of difficulties when we start to build our own view of them. Getting that view shattered will never be pleasant, and even the idea of something can threaten our image and thus make us feel bad or even defensive. I really don’t know any great way to get around this but to simply try to be aware and get yourself used to the thought that your image might not completely overlap with reality. This goes for thinking something about individual people and their relationships to each other. We should always be prepared to be wrong. Not that we should say “anything is possible” or that everything is equally likely, because honestly saying things like BTS all hate each other etc. is so unlikely it’s basically impossible. (At least to me.) But again, we need to remind ourselves we are only people watching from afar. We do know BTS to some extent, but only what they choose to show us, it’s not a mutual relationship even though it might feel very intimate. 

I think the biggest problem is when our own views become more worth to us than what we actually get to see or hear from the boys directly. When fans think we know better or get invasive and toxic in how we express our views. We also really need to remember to sepparate anything that comes from the fandom from what comes from BTS themselves. No matter if it’s toxic people or toxic narratives we have to try and not let it influence our views of BTS themselves. Again the only advice I can really give is to try and actively remember the difference and to stay away and not engage with anything that might affect you in a harmful way. I know it’s difficult and I am sorry I can’t be of any more help. But yes, you who feel like this aren’t alone, and it’s not easy but at least you are trying and most importantly don’t want to feel this way.

As for the second part of the second ask about wanting JK to be with someone who priorotize him I just want to point out that if another ship than Vmin is real I am sure they do love each other and appriciate each other. We don’t get to see everything, so for all we know they might say even “worse” things, just not publically. This is after all also part of our image based on what we see, which doesn’t have to translate into their real lives. I know it might feel big or weird with Vmin calling each other soulmates while another ship has to hide, but at the end of the day that’s also how WE feel about it, and not neccessarily how they would feel about it. If any ship is real I am sure they are fine with all the things all members do to each other at this point or they simply wouldn’t do them, at least most of the time. Once again it’s important to trust their judgement over our own views on what would be good or bad etc.

Thank you again for sharing your stories, I think not feeling alone and trying to understand these problems is a good step towards working to overcome it. <3

Ask 7 - Tae wanting to have children and him being together with someone of the same sex

Hi and first of all don’t worry about me getting angry. I rarely get angry for people asking questions, but rather how and maybe why they ask them. I don’t see why wondering about Tae being so vocal about wanting children is bad, but I do think we have to remember that wanting children doesn’t equal they will never choose to be with someone of the same sex. Jimin too has said “Is this how I will feel when I become a father” and has said he wants children. Tae being louder about it doesn’t make him less likely to be queer and it doesn’t mean he can’t still want it but choose to be with a man anyway, despite the struggles. I get your point though and it’s good to keep in mind and not gloss over. It would be something that might make a gay relationship with Tae less likely, but it also mostly depends on things we have no clue about.

We also have to remember no matter what it’s likely not something they would want now and there is still time for the world to change. Tae could be optimistic that things will change eventually, who knows. Of course it’s also possible for him to change his opinion. Personally I used to think I would get married and have children but now think that’s not for me. I do believe he does want children, don’t get me wrong, he seems to love children a lot and has even said he want a lot of children. But I just want to leave it open for him to change or to choose other things above having a family. We don’t know how important having children would be for him if put in the situation of having to choose.

I do think we shouldn’t dimiss Tae wanting children completely in the “is he with a man in a serious relationship” question but that jumping to “well then he clearly is going to get married to a woman” is something very different. He could be saying it because he sees himself marrying a woman in the future, it’s definitely very possible that he doesn’t think about it further than that. Or he could be kind of like “I want children, we will figure out the rest when we get there.”

In the end I don’t think Tae being loud about wanting family has to mean much in any direction as it depends on a lot of other things. Like what did he think when he said it, does he think the same now, would he choose to be with the person he loves over having a family, is he hopeful he will be able to have a family with another man no matter the current circumstances etc? We don’t know what Tae thinks, except that he does seem to want family. Which again, Jimin seems to want too, so then it should be brought up for him as well (even if Tae has said it more often.)

This is of course just what if’s to begin with, and wanting family and not being leagally allowed to is of course a big thing. We just can’t know how Tae personally would think about it or express it even if he was LGBT+ and in a relationship with another man. He could choose to in the end marry a woman even if he is LGBT+ as well of course. But again it’s one of those things that is too personal and where individual choice/view matters too much for me to really know if it would reflect in Taehyung’s way to express it or not.

Sorry for the kind of non answer... I just don’t think we have enough to go on and that assuming what Tae would say or nor say or what he would choose in the end is too difficult to say.

Ask 8 - Going down the rabbit hole, micromoments and shipping vs believing

Hi and thank you for your praise and shared moments. You requested to be on anon so I’ll just remove your name. :) I think it’s really important to realize the differences in our own views and behaviors, and I am glad you liked my post  Shipping vs Believing because I really think it’s one of the most important posts I have written on this blog.

I’ll start a bit harsh by saying this; that moments on their own no matter how suggestive or weird doesn’t really mean much to me. Micro or big doesn’t matter much either, they might still mean nothing more than Vmin being platonic but having an odd moment. For me the behaviors and changes over time, the things that seem to become patterns and that doesn’t seem to fully make sense from an outsider perspective are the things that really make me wonder. But even then most things are simply interpretation and speculation and thus I end up somewhere with “this could mean something or it could mean nothing” for basically all moments. I won’t dismiss small moments just because they are small because if there is something they too are part of the whole, but I won’t hyper analyze big moments because if it’s nothing there it’s just me adding intention in my interpretation. It’s the full picture that I try to consider. 

Truly questionable indivudual moments are rare, and again, on their own wouldn’t even be that questionable if not for the fact that some of them have happened more than once or twice. Basically Tae writing one song based on a very important moment between him and Jimin wouldn’t be too weird. But if he is consistantly writing to or about Jimin specifically there could be more to it. It’s still just a could, but it’s the way I view things as more or less interesting in a full perspective.

As for the Run 53 moment I personally didn’t see anything in that moment of Vmin sharing and eating that Gimbap as something suggestive (I assume that’s the part you meant based on the time stamp). I think Jimin getting a bit annoyed and him wanting to draw on Tae is more interesting in comparison. Or how JK seemed to think Jimin just wanted to write his name on Tae’s body and Jimin said he “couldn’t do it” on his own shirt.

For the instagram post, thank you for the collection of cursed Vmin moments. :) I do enjoy these moments and gush about them and speculate about them of course, but again... None of these videos on their own would really make me wonder about Vmin. I’ve seen far worse in many other real people ships (Taemin and Kai or just all of Shinee is a good example), not to mention most of them are on stage and could at least be dismissed as partly fanservice (again fanservice doesn’t mean fake). 

No, for me moments on their own are not what makes me wonder about Vmin. The songs, the change over time, the possibility of them being careful with stuff (vlives or Jimin getting nervous) etc. is much more questionable to me. If we add moments on top, the moments could mean something... But they really don’t have to. Other shippers have their own moments that they think put their ship above any others, so it really is too subjective most of the time for me to truly think much of a particular moment. Even if Vmin would be real I don’t think a lot of moments has to mean anything special. The patterns though... Or when I have theories and I can keep adding to them... That’s when small moments and big moments become something possibly “more” to me. 

Sorry if I am shooting down your moments, I still enjoy them of course, even though I don’t think they are suggestive or special on their own. But really, thank you for sharing your thoughts and these nice moments. <3

Ask 9 - Vmin cuddling and grabbing ass

Haha, it’s funny because when I got the first ask I wondered if maybe you saw MY POST, and turns out you did. :P No need to be sorry, I can still talk a little bit about it since that was part of your ask. And there are a lot of Vmin blogs and content so mixing it up is totally understandable, especially since it was just a moment and not a discussion post.

Personally I think we have seen many moments like this from Vmin and other members, and the only thing I feel might be something is how Jimin squeezes and then seem to change to slapping which I suppose looks less intimate. (The squeeze is not in the gif, sorry.)

Again, coming from the ask above this is a typical example of a moment that could be something or nothing no matter if Vmin is real or not. I do agree it looks very intimate and I do love that Vmin have an obsession with each other’s asses, but if it’s platonic or not is really just up for interpretation. Also while I do think they usually are aware of them being filmed I do think behaviors can slip through and they forget in the moment.  Or they just don’t care at times? It wouldn’t surprise me if these slip ups are more likely to happen in each other’s company or in places they feel less guarded, for example at home. But even if it’s a reaction like “oh wait I shouldn’t do this on camera” it still doesn’t have to mean more than that they don’t want to show it camera. I’ve said it before but even being careful or doing things like hiding in rooms or even being jealous or writing songs has to automatically be romantic/sexual. Vmin act in ways that are questionable, but them being queerplatonic and just careful is very much a possibility as well.

Ask 10 - Vmin vs Ji/kook being less/more vocal and how did I survive being a Vmin shipper for so long?

Haha, you make being a Vminie sound difficult when truly it’s the easiest thing in the world. I know I am repeating myself but just because we got a lot of moments from other ships it doesn’t mean we didn’t get anything from Vmin. I also personally think that Jimin in typical Jimin fashion started to cling more to JK after he went through a rough time in 2018, just like Jimin got glued to Tae in Malta when he was sad and needed comfort. Jimin is just a good human like that. That being said, ships always go up and down in amount of moments and at this point I don’t think about it too much.

I really think Vmin sharing a lot more now has a lot to do with slow change over time, and simply feeling comfortable being more open. It’s of course possible they did spend less time in those years and thus had less to say... But considering some of the odd behaviors and the fact that Tae in particular didn’t shut up about Jimin at all, I think a lot of it comes down to fan perception. More people are noticing and hyping Vmin moments now as well. I also personally try to avoid the “what happened” speculations in regards to ships in particular when we don’t know if the change we see has to be about a ship or even if that change is actually real or just us projecting. Vmin saying they got closer is one thing, but when I speak about how Vmin seemed to get more careful that really is just my interpretation and guess.

I also don’t really know how much we can compare “do it a lot more now vs before” with Ji/kook because they still do those things... There are other factors that can play a part in why it’s brought up or not brought up more or less that doesn’t have to be related to being open vs careful. I mean, we got the Run episode of Ji/kook leaving together just recently, and Jimin mentioning several times about being with JK for the Billboard nr 1 news. At the same time we got a lot of Vmin and even Tae’s “I told him to come sleep next to me”... So really I don’t think the two things happening more or less can be easily compared or that we can add any intentions behind it.

Moments are up and down a lot over time... For all ships. And I see people start to worry “did something happen” even for ships like Ji/kook. Being a fan for long really does add perspective. I think for me coming into it being aware of idol culture and as a seasoned shipper it was also easier to just appriciate moments as they came and hoping for more without adding too much “doom think” into it. 

I don’t get worried about Vmin because I know even if we have a period of less moments we will get more soon again. Just look at now recently with there being little moments here and there, and people being sad and waiting for crumbs, followed by this week with so many great Vmin moments!

Shipping Vmin is easy when I focus on what we have and what we get instead of what we don’t get or what other ships get. Having perspective over time and patience and faith in their bond also helps. :) Vmin are easy to love after all. <3

Ask 11 - Choosing what asks to answer (and a bunch of nice things)

Oh my, I mean thank you. :3 But also sorry? Because I feel this ask collection had a lot of topics straying away from just “lovely things about Vmin”. I even kind of compared other ships a lot, so I hope you understand I will bring up some controversial topics and have opinions that people won’t agree with from time to time. It’s not my focus or course and I will avoid things I do think are too toxic, but I also feel like sometimes the difficult topics needs to be adressed. Like a lot of the asks today for example. 

I think I will make a post about ask etiquette, but generally I’ll try to answer your asks if I can. As long as it’s not something I don’t want to talk about or if it’s straight up toxic.

Still, your thoughts about me and my blog made me very happy. Thank you for liking my writing style too, because I tend to be all over the place and repeat myself a lot, not to mention actual mistakes and being generally sloppy. ^^’’’  So thank you! I just hope you are ok with asks like today too, but otherwise at least I am trying to add topics so you can avoid it if it seems like something you don’t want to read about. <3

Ask 12 - This ask just makes me happy

I mean what else can I say but thank you? And how your words makes me really happy and all warm on the inside. I try hard to not get swayed too hard in any direction, but not going to lie, that is very hard sometimes. Both in good and bad directions. As you say, at the end of the day we should all try to remember the difference between theory and confirmed things, even if something sounds very plausible or makes sense. And being an ARMY for a longer time (though not at all since the beginning) does give perspective. But it doesn’t really make my opinions superior or Vmin as a ship superior for that matter. All it really says is that Vmin are worth loving and that there is a lot to say and gush about them from every single year. Thank you again for your kind words. 

And that was it for this time... There was a lot of complicated asks today, and some topics might not be what you wish to read about, but I hope you all enjoyed and found this post interesting regerdless. Sorry for the lack of depth to some of my replies, but I felt I included most of what I wanted to say to some very difficult questions that would probably require a lot more time and detail to truly answer well.

I have plenty of asks left, not the least about Let’s BTS. But like I mentioned I need to save them for later as I haven’t watched the full thing yet and I want as much context as possible. But there is one thing I do know, and that is that 95z is love! 

Thank you all for reading, and sorry for the heavy topics and fuzzy replies. Feel free to discuss, but please remain civil. <3 

[jango-fettish]

The Ruler and the Killer (Syrena Aster x Sunburst Squadron)

Rating: R or M (I don’t know, yo)

Word Count: 7,376

Warnings: DEATH (there is character death in this you have been warned), canonical-type violence, cursing, the Heretics are meanie butt heads with meanie butt head rules, brief mention of a blowjob (im proud, i only used cock in this once), my possible typos and grammatical errors (please let me know if i should warn about anything else!!!)

A/N: Thanks to @jangofctts​​ again for creating the Sunburst Squadron and letting me use them. And thank you for letting me kILL MAX. Also, thank you to @weebblossom​ for letting me steal your Heretic personality for Fenn. 

Someone once told Syrena, when she was a young girl still surrounded by the loving embrace of her mother, that a person can be brought back to life just by remembering them. If that were true, Syrena had a long list of names she’d like to bring back. Most with a black check next to their name: the people she wanted to bring back just to kill all over again. People who deserved to die for a second time, like her mother who once held her so tightly to her chest and promised to love her till the end of time. 

But there were a few she would bring back because, truthfully, they did not deserve to die. She shouldn’t have killed them and she would do anything to turn back the hands of time to fix her mistake...her error that resulted in the blood of an innocent spilled on her behalf. But like Death, Time was a fickle friend to Syrena and once something is done, there wasn’t enough money or praying in the world that she could do to change it. 

Syrena frowned to herself, a dark unsettling feeling sinking in the pit of her stomach. It was the type of feeling someone wouldn’t want before they were about to commit a crime against the Republic. She’d had it once before, when she took her first solo job after her training finished. She had just turned sixteen. Three innocent people died that day, three names added to her list that she would bring back. Syrena looked around the ship, wondering if the others had the same feeling, but they were all preoccupied with checking their weapons on last time. 

“What’s on your mind?” a sweet voice said, tearing Syrena away from her thoughts. 

She looked up to see Nettie, a plucky Rodian that had a knack for getting too involved in other people’s business. Syrena supposed it fit: Nettie was a hacker, a damn good one too, so of course she would try to get as much information out of a person as possible as she did with a computer. Nettie’s bulbous black eyes stared down at Syrena, trying to silently unlock the secrets she held. They looked as if starlight was streaking through them. It made Syrena uncomfortable and only added to the unsettling feeling in her stomach, making it expand upward and try to claw its way out her throat. 

Syrena had known Nettie for some time now, probably the most out of anyone on their four person team. They had been roommates during the beginning years of training, spending nearly six year stuck in the same small room together and trying to survive. Nettie was sweet and soft, everything a Heretic wasn’t supposed to be. They spent years whispering secrets and crying to one another, only letting the other person in. They were each other’s rock during those six years. The only reason why they went their separate ways was because they had to choose their speciality, to continue their training and become the deadly weapons the Heretics were known throughout the galaxy as. The Rodian chose technology and hacking, while Syrena stuck with combat and weaponry. 

“All this trouble just for some information,” Syrena said, rubbing the palms of her hands on her thighs. The ship they were on lurched to the left again, the various weapons hanging from the walls clinging together. “Seems a little overkill to have four people for this.”

It was rare for there to be a mission that required more than just two Heretics. And even then, one was usually good enough. But for this specific mission, there were two teams of four. They didn’t even know what information they were after. 

“Get in, get the information, get out. Kill anyone that gets in your way, if necessary,” the Creator had told them when giving the assignment. The Creator wanted everything, so they would get everything. The other team would take care of the distraction. 

“Knowing your enemy from the inside out is the only true way of instilling fear,” Nettie said, slowly sliding into the open seat next to Syrena. 

Syrena recoiled at her words, “Since when was the Republic our enemy? We haven’t chosen a side in over a millenia.”

“Perhaps our current Creator wishes to change that,” the Rodian pondered. 

“‘Bout time, if you ask me,” another voice said, cutting through their conversation. The melodic tone clashed with Syrena’s patience like loud cymbals being beaten together over and over again. “The Republic has been taking advantage of the Heretics for decades now. Glad we finally have someone in charge that has a clear vision of what we should have always been.”

“Oh, piss off back to Dothomir, Fenn,” Syrena said, rolling her eyes. She leaned back and shut her eyes, barely catching the snarl form on the Zabraks face. “The Heretics shouldn’t take sides. We’re nothing more than the shadows that charge the wealthy bastards of the galaxy a bit too much to do their dirty work.” 

“Rich coming from you, snake,” Fenn hissed, stepping closer to Syrena. 

“You got something to say, Pointy? Say it.” Syrena’s eyes were still closed, but she could feel the heat and rage radiating off of the Zabrak. 

“You’re fucking a clone. We all know it.”

Syrena’s eyes shot open into a glare, “Who I’m fucking isn’t anyone’s business, especially yours.” 

“If it clouds your piss poor judgement on a job, then yeah it is my business.”

There was a shock of electricity throughout the cabin of the ship. In an instant, Syrena was on her feet, the blade she kept hidden in her wrist vambrace shot out and pressed against the Zabrak’s neck. Fenn, for all of her faults, was just as quick as Syrena. Her own vibroblade was pointing upwards against Syrena’s stomach. One movement from either of them would result in a painful and bloody death. They were snarling at each other, animalistic noises coming from their throats. 

“Alright, that’s enough,” Alyze said.

Alyze was one of the oldest Heretics. They were well respected in the community and had a favorable opinion with the Republic after helping to train the clone ARC Troopers at the beginning of the war. It was a well paying gig, one any Heretic would jump to take. But Alyze was the best choice for the job. 

Syrena and Fenn continued glaring at each other. Syrena pressed the knife harder onto Fenn’s skin, satisfied when the Zabrak winced at the sting of the freshly sharpened blade. Alyze finally stepped close to the two, wanting the situation to diffuse. If Alyze was in a worse mood, they would have physically stopped the encounter, but their thoughts and care were focused on the mission. 

“I said enough,” Alyze barked, their irritation with the two smaller women growing, “We’re almost at the drop location. Get your heads out of your asses and get ready for deployment.”

Fenn hissed at Syrena before drawing her vibroblade away. Syrena could only laugh to herself as she retracted her blade. It slowly slid back into its secret compartment.  

“Unless your mouth is the one on my pussy, shut the fuck up about who I’m sleeping with, got it?” Syrena warned. Fenn went back to her seat, keeping her glare on Syrena. 

Syrena approached Nettie again, holding onto one of the overhanging bars. The closer the ship got to the drop point, the bumpier it became. 

“Fenn has a point you know,” Nettie said, looking up at Syrena. “Your infatuation with the clone could be detrimental to this and future missions. I give it a 88% chance of failing and resulting in the death of the clone or yourself.”

“Nettie, can you just,” Syrena sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose, “just not be a know-it-all right now.”

“Interesting, though, how they are allowing this relationship to continue.”

“What are you talking about?” 

“The powers that be. The Creator. Myrkos.” Syrena frowned at the mention of her old Master. “They stopped Alyze’s relationship with that Jedi on Kamino before it became....a hindrance to the Creator’s objective.”

“Well clearly they don’t think that this is anything more than me screwing around.”

“For now,” Nettie said, her voice sounding far away. “Though, you have been put in their favor since you provided the intel on when the troopers change their shifts, giving us the perfect opportunity to drop in. Does your clone know that you used him for information? Is that the type of bedroom talk you can get out of him? Impressive.”

“Nettie, just...just shut up, please.”  

“My apologies, no harm intended,” Nettie said with a smile. 

She was beginning to make Syrena feel uneasy, and rather guilty. She had gotten the information out of Bruiser during one of their more...intimate encounters, but he didn’t have to spill the beans. It was his choice to tell her, his choice to trust her even though she had warned him not to.

“Syrena,” Nettie began again, “I don’t know what gods you pray to or if you even believe in any. But you better hope that they are on your side. Who knows exactly what would happen should you lose favor with them. Or worse, lose favor with the Creator.” 

“Let’s go,” Alyze interjected before Syrena could fully process what Nettie had said, “we’re at the drop zone.”

Getting into the Republic military outpost on Coruscant was easy, especially with the knowledge Syrena had provided regarding trooper shift changes. In the end, it was an easy drop, with a quick landing on the roof before the four of them got in through the ventilation system. Surely by now the Republic would learn to get smaller vents. 

“It changes all the time,” Bruiser had said to her in confidence, his words breathy as her tongue swirled around the head of his flushed leaking cock. “Never know until, oh kriff, never know until we’re called.”

She only hoped that they weren’t stationed there today. She usually warned Bruiser if she was involved in any unsavory Heretic business. Though it was typically only a, ‘Hey I’m arriving in like five minutes to fuck shit up, see you then,’ type of warning. But five minutes was better than nothing. 

“Syrena,” Alyze harshly whispered, pulling her out of her memories, “Get your head in the fucking mission.” 

“Sorry,” Syrena mumbled, checking the hallway for the third time to see if anyone was coming. 

They just needed to clear one more hallway before they made it to the main room containing anything and everything regarding the Republic’s Military Intelligence. Just two more blast doors and then the easy part would come. Nettie was ready, her gear already hooked into the security system and working on encoding the firewalls. 

“Their systems are as protected as this building,” Nettie scoffed sarcastically. “Ray shields are down, we can proceed.” 

“Good, let's get this shit over with,” Fenn said, walking down the hallway with her blaster drawn.

Alyze and Nettie trailed behind her, their own weapons at the ready. Syrena, however, looked back the way they came, the unsettling feeling rising once again. She could feel the Force stirring ominously, hear the way the electricity cackled throughout the walls. Something was terribly wrong, but Syrena had no idea what it was or if she could do anything about it. 

“Syrena,” Nettie said. Syrena turned, almost slamming straight into the Rodian, “Let’s go.” 

Syrena nodded shortly, following the shorter woman carefully down the hallway. Her nerves were on high alert and she couldn’t read the energy in the Force anymore. 

They got into the room quickly, Nettie making her way to the main computer to set up her gear. 

“Syrena, you stay here with Nettie, make sure everything goes alright. Fenn and I will scout the hallways,” Alyze ordered before looking at the spunky Zabrak, “We’re here to incapacitate only. I don’t care what the Creator said, I don’t want any unnecessary deaths.”

“What’s the fun in that?” Fenn whined, “If you ask me, the only good clone is a dead one.” 

“It’s a good thing no one asked you,” Alyze snapped before looking to Syrena, “Lock the doors behind us.” 

Syrena nodded, sending a seething glare towards Fenn. She truly would not care if something happened to Fenn during this mission. If she had the opportunity to, Syrena was sure she would just step to the side and let blaster fire turn the Zabrak to dust.

She watched as Fenn stalked back into the hallway, putting her brass knuckles on. Syrena had been on the receiving end of one of Fenn’s beat downs. She knew the power and aggression behind Fenn’s hits and only hoped that whoever would be receiving them today truly deserved it. Alyze grabbed Syrena by the arm, pulling her close to their side. 

“You need to promise me something,” they said, their dark box braids brushing against Syrena’s forearm, “I need you to be one of us if your clone and his friends are the ones here. I need you to remember who you are.” 

Syrena looked up at Alyze, their dark eyes boring into her own pink ones, “You ever regret it? Letting them determine who you could be with or love, like a good little Heretic?” 

Syrena’s words cut through the air, her accusatory tone causing Alyze to recoil. They dropped Syrena’s arm, “You’re the reason why we are here, Syrena. Don’t forget that.” 

Syrena watched Alyze follow Fenn out the door, a small twinge of regret surging through her bones before she shut and locked the blast doors. 

******

“How long until we are back online?” Commander Fox asked into his commlink, his station in a frenzy since they were locked out of the security system. He had taken a small group of troopers, along with Commander Blanche and most of the Sunburst Squadron, to go hall by hall, looking for the intruders. Two of the members were needed elsewhere. 

“Won’t know for awhile, sir,” the trooper on the other end responded. “We keep coming across more and more viruses.”

“Can you tell me anything?” Fox asked exasperated. 

“Got a good photo of the perps. It’s ‘bout 20 minutes old, can’t confirm where inside they are. Forwarding to you now, sir.”

He looked back to Commander Blanche, signaling for him to come over. With a long stride, Blanche made his way to Fox, speaking once he got close enough, “I think it’s best if we split up, my squad will head to the east while yours goes west. Cover more ground that way.” 

“I agree,” Fox said with a nod. In an instant a hologram photo was pinged to his wrist link. “These are who we are dealing with. Their running facial recognition now.”

Blanche took a long look at the hologram, his face dropping into a frown as he recognized one of the faces, “Dank farrik, Heretics. We need more troopers.” 

“Well that explains the other attack,”Fox said to himself. “Working simultaneously.”

“Other attack?” Blanche asked.

“Another group of four, what I’m assuming now, Heretics bombed a hospital. Thorn has the rest of my men and the 104th to help with the wreckage. 212th are trying to track them down.” Fox looked back to his wrist link, the blue hued photo flickering as the communication systems surged. He had dealt with Heretics before, lost men to them. They were feral and unyielding beings with no clear allegiance, which made them even more dangerous. “You recognize any of them?” 

Blanche took a closer look at the hologram, his face dropping when he did recognize one of the small figures, “Syrena Aster. She’s, uh...helped us a few times, been against us more.” 

If that were only the case. Blanche took a quick peek back at the rest of his men, his eyes settling on Bruiser’s large form before looking back at the hologram. 

“Do you trust her?” 

“I trust her about as far as I can throw her, and even then she’d probably turn around and stab me,” Blanche scoffed. 

“Do any of your men trust her?” 

Blanche was silent at this. It wasn’t a secret that Bruiser had some sort of relationship with the Heretic. Blanche and the General had both warned him against it, but Syrena had the heavy infantry trooper wrapped around her finger. 

“We don’t know what they are after or who paid them to get it. I need to know if any of your men would hesitate at any moment with doing their job.” 

“They’ll do their jobs,” Blanche snapped. “It’ll be fine.” 

Fox paused for a moment before nodding curtly, “We’ll meet back here in 30 minutes if we don’t find anyone.” 

“Got it,” Blanche said.

“And Commander,” Fox said, dropping the informal nature of their conversation, “If they went to where I think they were going, we can’t let them get away with that information. Engage if your team finds them, kill ‘em if necessary.”

Blanche nodded again, his hands clenching and unclenching. He turned away, stalking back to his team. His mind was a mess. It just had to be her with them, couldn’t have been some faceless Heretic that they didn't know. But this was Syrena and although most of the squadron found her just tolerable, there were others that liked her, that needed her. 

“We know who we are dealing with, Blanchie?” Max asked. Just his soothing demeanor was enough to calm the Commander down. 

“She’s short, blonde, and green,” Blanche said, “and more annoying than a Gungan.” 

“Syrena’s not that annoying,” Max argued softly. Blanche could picture the smile on the sergeant’s face under the helmet. “Plus, she makes Bruiser happy.”

Blanche grimaced under his helmet, keeping a rather mean comment about how it was her mouth and cunt that made Bruiser happy, not Syrena herself. “You’re too nice for your own good.”

Max sighed. Maybe he was, but he’d rather believe that Syrena wasn’t as bad as everyone believed than condemn her to be just an evil seductress. He looked over to Bruiser, “You think he knows she’s here?” 

“No,” Blanche admitted, watching as Bruiser checked over his Z-6 rotary blaster cannon, “And let's keep it that way for now.”

Max nodded stiffly. He didn’t like keeping things from his team members, especially something like this. Blanche maybe didn’t see it, but Max had noticed the way Bruiser and Syrena were around each other. How they seemed to be each other’s center of gravity. He heard the noises coming from Bruiser’s room and the soft words they whispered to each other. He knew he wasn’t the only one that saw their searing looks and secretive touches. It was like they were making sure that the other was actually real, that they weren’t just some spectral being about to fade into the ether. 

The team moved out, Blanche only relaying that there were four possible perps: highly armed and highly dangerous. The hallways had been long abandoned, any officer or staff member told to evacuate the building when the alarms first went off. They went door to door, checking to see if anyone was hidden in the dark corners of unlit rooms. 

Blanche realized as they passed another empty set of rooms that they had transitioned into the Naval Intelligence headquarters and were approaching the main intelligence room. All of the GAR’s battle strategies, outpost locations, and other important information was stored there.

“I hear something,” Jaws said, positioning himself behind a large column. He signaled for the others to find cover. 

There was a large bang, like the sound of blast doors shut, followed by two bickering voices. 

“You egg her on anymore and I’ll let her kill you,” one said. 

“You would take that bitches side,” the other voice sneered, “You are both whores for Republic dogs.”

“Fenn,” the first voice dropped low and threatening, “if you speak to me that way again, I will tear your heart out of your chest and eat it before letting her finish you off.” 

The troopers were silent as the footsteps of the Heretic’s retreated down another hallway. 

“We need to get those blast doors open,” Blanche said. 

“I can shoot at it?” Bruiser suggested, lifting the blaster cannon up a little. 

Max shook his head, “Takes too long, buddy. I got some detonators, but I need to get closer.” 

“Alright,” Blanche said with a nod, “Sweets, Fuse, Blue, you three stay here and watch our backs. They might find a way to circle around. Bruiser, Max, Jaws, and I will approach the doors. Has anyone heard from Kami or Void?” 

“Kami said they shot down a ship that tried to escape to the lower levels, but can’t confirm who was in it or if it was even the one they were after,” Max said, “Void’s up in his arms in injuries.” 

“Alright, let’s make this quick so we can rendezvous with the General and others,” Blanche ordered, getting his blaster at the ready. He hoped it would be quick and simple. He hoped Syrena would see them and somehow convince her team to just back off and leave. 

But nothing was ever simple with Syrena.

The four of them slowly approached the blaster doors, their footsteps silent against the shiny floors, their warped reflections inching closer and closer to the intended target with each step. Blanche looked back for a moment, watching as Sweets, Fuse, and Blue’s figures got farther and farther away. The hallway seemed longer, more narrow, than it actually was. Blanche’s heart was racing, he could feel his hands and neck sweating the closer they got to the blast doors. 

“Fenn, You hear that?” a voice said. It sounded like it was coming from everywhere as the crisp sound echoed off the hallways. The four troopers quickly took cover behind columns and sections of the wall that jutted out.  

“No,” the second voice, Fenn, responded with a giggle, “but I can smell them. Looks like we’re going to have some fun after all, Alyze. Come out, come out wherever you are, boys. We just want to play.” 

Fenn’s voice was melodic and sweet, almost like she was singing to them. She was the one to fire first, sending a scalding red blaster shot where Jaws’s head had been seconds before. 

It happened all at once, blaster fire coming from both sides, igniting the hallway in angry flurries of red. It was so loud, so aggressive. The hallway flooded with smoke as the blaster fires sizzled and seared into the walls. 

“One coming from our end!” Blue called into the commlink. “I repeat, one coming from our end.” 

They had been able to find their way through the maze of hallways, with one Heretic approaching from the blast doors, while the other took charge from the other side. Though the Heretics were outmanned, their skills and ferocity made up for it. 

Blanche heard a strangled cry before Blue’s voice echoed through the comms again, “Sweet’s been hit. He’s alright, just a shot to the shoulder. Can’t see the perp though.” 

“Stop hiding!” Fenn’s teasing voice echoed above the blaster shots, “I want to play!” 

Blanche turned to Max, “Are we close enough?” 

Max peaked over the side of the wall, a blaster shot narrowly missing his head. It singed the cheek of his helmet, leaving behind a blackened streak of soot, “I can’t tell. Might get the door, might miss it. It’ll be a good distraction though.” 

Blanche thought for a moment. They hadn’t seen or heard from Syrena. She was either inside of the room or Blanche had  misidentified the person in the holophoto. He secretly hoped for the latter. 

“Do it,” he ordered Max, “Get that kriffing door open.”

Max nodded, reaching to his side and taking out two thermal detonators. One was bound to hit the door, right? He pressed the bottoms on the top, making sure the red light was blinking before he crouched down. He swung his arm back, ready to release the detonators before Bruiser’s voice on the other side of the hallway made him hesitate. 

“Syrena?” Bruiser called. He ceased fire as he saw Syrena appear from behind the blast doors. 

“Wait, wait! Max, wait!” Blanche hurriedly said, looking down at Max. 

But, it was too late. 

The sudden change in order didn’t catch up fast enough with Max’s hand and one of the detonators was released, rolling down the hallway. He quickly shut off the other, the red light disappearing as it powered down. He let it drop to the ground in a thud. But the other one continued to make its way down the hallway right towards Syrena.

Max and Blanche both looked at each other, before looking back at the detonator. Max attempted to scramble forward to get it, but a blaster shot from Fenn forced him back. Blanche watched as Syrena’s face contorted from confusion to panic and she took in the scene before her. He realized she didn’t know they were the ones that would deal with the intruders.

She didn’t know. 

“Oh no,” Max and Blanche whispered at the same time, as Syrena’s expression changed again to horror as the detonator rolled past her foot and into the room.

****

Syrena watched as Nettie continued to shift her way through the Republic firewalls, installing virus after virus so that they wouldn’t be able to stop her, while she simultaneously scoured through the information. It was taking the Rodian longer than expected to get to everything and scramble it to her server the created just for this. The uploading process was the longest, having to go through multiple security systems in order to begin the upload. 

The two heard loud blaster shots coming from beyond the blast doors, ricocheting off of the thick metal with a booming twang. They had started only a minute ago, getting louder and louder as whoever was out there closed in. 

“How much longer?” Syrena asked, stepping behind Nettie and looking over her shoulder. She scrunched her nose, unable to read the various symbols and numbers that Nettie was typing. 

“This one file is giving me some issues,” Nettie said, her teeth gritting. “Go see if they need help.” 

“Alyze told me to stay with you,” Syrena argued. 

“I know what they said,” Nettie snapped. She clenched her fists once, taking a calming breathe, “Your energy is just too much for me to handle. Just go...I should be done any minute now.” 

Syrena bit her lip, leaning back up and stepping away from the workstation. Nettie’s shoulders seemed to relax as the shadow of nervous energy retreated with Syrena. 

Syrena clicked her wrist link, “What’s going on out there?” 

“We’re taking on heavy fire. Hurry up in there,” Alyze answered. 

“I’m opening the blast doors,” Syrena said. “Nettie’s almost done, we can hold up in here until she’s finished.” 

“That’s a negative,” Alyze growled, “Don’t open the doors. That’s an order.” 

“Oh, bite me,” Syrena quipped back. 

She walked to the blast door, clicking the controls for them to open. As they slowly began to unlatch, that unsettling feeling settled in Syrena again. It was painful and tight, slowly swirling through her chest and stomach all the way to her fingers and toes. The door continued to open and Syrena ducked to evade a stray blaster fire. 

“Syrena?” a familiar voice said, the booming sound muffled by the blaster fire. 

She looked up, recognizing the voice. Realization slowly melted into her bones as she watched Alyze and Fenn fire at the Sunburst Squadron. 

“Wait, wait!” a man hurriedly called out, “Max, wait!” 

Syrena watched as the clone sergeant rolled a circular thermal detonator towards the opening door. It was like time had turned to cooling lava, thick and heavy and moving slowly, and all she could do was watch. Her breath hitched in her throat as it rolled past her feet and towards where Nettie was seated. 

“Almost got it!” 

“Nettie, move!” 

Syrena and Nettie shouted at the same time, the Rodian not seeing the explosive stop just shy of her feet. Syrena began to rush forward, towards Nettie and the bomb. 

The explosive went off and Syrena was launched out of the room in a burst of smoke and flames. Her head slammed against the metal floor and she felt a sharp pain through her side. Syrena could only hear the yells and screams of everyone around her before she succumbed to the darkness. 

She woke up to Fenn screaming at someone to stay quiet, followed by a loud crunch. Her eyes shot open, realizing that they were back in the room her and Nettie had been in. Though, it looked nothing like the room anymore. It was like a bomb went off. Syrena slowly remembered that a bomb did go off. 

Her eyes followed a body sized streak of blood leading from the blast doors right to where she was located, propped up against a cabinet. She was sure she would have remembered being dragged back into the room, but everything was a blur since the explosion. Syrena tried to take a deep breath, tried to blink away the black spots that clouded the edges of her vision, but her lungs stung. She sputtered out a cough, phlegm and blood dripping onto her chin as she took in her surroundings. 

The tightness in her chest and burning in her lungs increased as she saw Nettie’s mangled and charred body lying peacefully on the ground. She was missing an arm and the lower half of her left leg. Syrena blinked away the tears that threatened to spill over as she was overcome with grief. She remembered letting Nettie expertly braid her hair when they were younger and the countless hours they spent consoling each other after a particularly rough day. She remembered her final goodbye as Nettie moved out of the tiny space they shared, the silent words of sisterly love and adoration for one another passed through the Force.  And now, nothing. Nothing in the Force was signaling to her that her fellow Heretic...her friend was alive. 

Syrena heard another one of Fenn’s engaged screams and she looked to the commotion. Alyze and Fenn, in their rage, had somehow managed to incapacitate every member of the Sunburst Squadron, bringing them to the center of the room and binding their hands together. Not all of them were awake and in her haziness, Syrena couldn’t tell who were the ones that were lying motionless on the ground.  She could see the rise and fall of their chests, soothing the panic that rose. They were all alive. 

But Nettie was dead.

“Syre, can you hear me? It’s Ja-”

“I said shut the fuck up!” Fenn screamed at the helmet clad trooper, her brass knuckle covered fist slamming to the side of his head. The plastoid cracked under her punch and his helmet was launched off his head. 

Jaws. 

“That’s enough,” Alyze said, cutting through Fenn’s rage. They were close to Syrena, hurriedly scouring through a medic bag. 

Fenn growled something incoherent as a response. She gripped the collar of Jaws’s chest plate, dragging him over with the rest of the members. She wrapped a piece of fabric around Jaws’s mouth, mumbling how tired she was of his pleas and sobs. 

As she blinked away the black spots, Syrena could make out the bruised and bloodied faces of those without helmets: Blanche, Max, Jaws, and Bruiser. Her heart clenched and she attempted to get up, but a sharp pain in her side stilled her movements.

Alyze bent down next to Syrena, grabbing the green woman’s face in their scarred hands, “How do you feel?” 

“I can’t,” Syrena coughed out, bile rising in her throat, “I can’t fucking breath.” 

She touched her chest and her stomach, her breath hitching once again when she felt a piece of smooth metal sticking out the side of her abdomen. She gripped the metal, yelling out in pain as it moved inside of her. 

“Syrena,” Bruiser called, trying to break free from the restraints. Fenn hit him across the face, telling him to be quiet. It only caused Syrena to move around more, wanting to wrap her hands around the Zabrak’s throat and squeeze until the bones cracked.

“Calm down” Alyze said softly, their larger hand wrapping around Syrena’s. 

“I have a fucking piece of metal sticking out of me, Alyze! I’m not going to be fucking calm,” Syrena growled, “Get this thing out of me so I can kill that bitch!”

“You always were so impatient.” Alyze rolled their eyes, “On the count of five, we’re going to take this out and then I’m going to stuff the wound with bacta and cover it. It’s not going to be pleasant.”

“You know what isn’t pleasant-” Syrena started, glaring at them. 

“Will you hurry it up already?” Fenn snapped, interrupting Syrena, “We don’t have the time to diddle daddle around.” 

Syrena took a deep breath in before looking at Alyze and nodding stiffly. 

“Okay...one, two three-” Alyze ripped the piece of metal from Syrena’s abdomen, a thick river of blood running out of the wound. 

“I thought you said on five!” Syrena snarled. She felt like her entire body was on fire as Alyze stuffed the wound with bacta. The pain was almost unbearable.

“You’ll live,” Alyze quipped. 

They put one large bacta patch on top, covering the rest of the wound. With careful hands, Alyze wrapped gauze around Syrena’s abdomen and stomach, tying the ends tightly. It was already stained on the edges with her blood, but it would keep her alive until they found a doctor. Alyze slowly helped Syrena up, allowing her to lean against the cabinet. She would need help to get back to the ship, further setting them back. But Alyze couldn’t lose another person.

All three of their wrist links beeped, causing the Heretics to look at the notification, though Syrena’s movements were lethargic and slow. Nettie had done it: the last of the information had been uploaded to their server. 

“Let’s go,” Alyze ordered, wrapping their arm around Syrena’s middle, “Leave them here.” 

Alyze began to take their first steps forward before Fenn’s growling voice stopped their movements.

“We can’t leave yet. We have rules for situations like this Alyze.”

Alyze shut their eyes tightly and cursed under their breath. They hoped that the surprise of the explosion and the news that they successfully completed their mission would be enough. But Fenn liked to follow the rules and was stubborn enough to risk them getting captured to see them through. 

Alyze gazed down at Syrena, expecting her to make some sort of sarcastic remark, but she was silent.  They had seen Syrena take worse hits and injuries. Kriff, Alyze had been the one doing the damage to the shorter woman a few times. But here, as she leaned against Alyze’s body, it looked like Syrena was about to fall to the ground dead. She wasn’t even looking at Fenn. Her pink serpent-like eyes were bleak and focused entirely on the clone troopers kneeling by Fenn’s feet. 

“This is the one that did it,” Fenn said, standing behind Max and pushing him forward. He fell hard onto his hands. 

“We don’t have time for this,” Alyze tried to argue. 

“Well, make time!” Fenn yelled, “Nettie is dead because of him. Syrena is injured. He needs to die.” 

Blanche, Bruiser, and Jaws all protested at once, Jaws’s voice muffled by the gag. 

“Please,” Blanche pleaded, his lip split and left eye swelling from Fenn’s beating, “Please, I’m the one that gave the orders. Leave him.”

“Blanche,” Max said softly. 

“No! Just-just shut up, Max.” Blanche looked to Alyze. “Take me instead.”

“We are not as lawless as you might believe, clone,” Alyze said, “We do follow a code. You may have said the orders, but your hand was not the one that released the detonator.” 

“I’ll do it,” Fenn said, taking her vibroblade out. 

“No.” Alyze looked from Max to Syrena. “Syrena has to be the one to do it.”

“What? No,” Bruiser said harshly, “No she isn’t doing anything. Syre...tell them you aren’t doing anything.” 

“You can’t be serious, Alyze,” Fenn scoffed, “She doesn’t have it in her. She’s grown soft. If anything, we should tell Myrkos when we get back and have her sent to the Pit or, better yet, decommissioned.” 

Syrena was still silent. Her gaze went from the Sunburst Squadron to Nettie’s body. She wished she had been quicker to realize what was happening, faster on her feet. She was a Heretic for crying out loud, she could have Force pushed Nettie out of the blast area. But she was too focused on the Sunburst Squadron, too focused on worrying about their safety. In that moment, she allowed them to make her forget who she was and it cost her friend her life. 

“She is the only survivor of the attack,” Alyze explained, “She knows the rules, a life for a life, and she will follow them.” 

“Syrena, please,” Blanche begged. 

“I’ll do it,” she whispered, her eyes tearing from Nettie to Max. All she could think of when she saw him was her failures. Her failure to keep Nettie alive and her failure to keep the Sunburst troopers safe and out of Heretic politics. She didn’t want any of this, but it was happening and she couldn’t stop it.

A cacophony of no’s and pleas came from the clone troopers as they all tried to break free of their constraints. Fenn backhanded Blanche, causing him to stagger to the side. He spit out to the side, a mixture of his blood and salvia splattering against the concrete floor.

As Syrena staggered towards Max, Blanche and Bruiser continued to plead with her, offering their life in exchange for his. It was a noble appeal really, but Syrena knew that it wouldn’t meet the most rigid law of the Heretics. And she knew Max wouldn’t allow it to happen; he wouldn’t let one of his brother’s suffer a gruesome fate for something he did. He took a life, so he would pay for it with his own. 

Syrena didn’t want him to die. She knew Max, knew the kind of person he was. He was kind, almost to a fault. He was nice and welcoming to her the moment they met, something not even Bruiser had been. 

But rules were rules and Syrena was ready to follow them. She would be the one to watch the light leave his eyes, to feel his last breath waft against her face, to add him to her list of lives that she wished she could bring back.

She would be his murderer. 

Syrena slowly kneeled in front of Max, ignoring the searing pain in her side. She blocked out the room, shutting out Blanche and Bruiser’s cries and Fenn’s yells for them to be quiet. She focused entirely on Max, taking in how he had sat back on his knees, his shoulders slumped forward and into himself. He hadn’t looked up since Fenn had brought him forward. His eyes were locked on Nettie’s body, and Syrena could see a few tears begin to stain his tanned, flushed cheeks. She reached out and touched one of them, rubbing the tear between her fingers.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” he whispered softly to her. “I didn’t mean-I didn’t want to kill anybody.” 

“I know,” she replied, her hand moving to rest on his shoulder. “You understand that I have to do this.”

He finally looked up at her, a small warm smile appearing on his face, “Yeah…It’s alright.” 

“It’s not alright.” Syrena couldn’t help the way her voice broke, as she settled her other hand on his other shoulder. “Are you afraid?” 

“No,” he said, shaking his head, “Are you?” 

“Terrified.” 

Max nodded back to Bruiser, “Take care of him will you? Take care of all of them. They need someone to keep them on their toes.” 

“Can hardly take care of myself,” she replied with a small smile. 

“You aren’t as bad as you think you are, you know? I can see it in your eyes.” 

Blanche’s broken voice cut through the air, “Please, Syrena. Please don’t kill him. I’m begging you.” 

She could hear the sobs he tried to hold back. She wouldn’t look at Blanche or the others. She couldn’t. So instead, she let her pain and anger take over, allowing the Dark Side to wash through her system and act as a crutch. Syrena didn’t want to feel this.

Max turned his head, his sweet smile still on his face as he looked at Blanche, “It’s okay Blanchie, I got this.” 

His last syllables were short and stuttered as the hidden knives in Syrena’s wrist vambraces sprung out, sinking deep into his chest. Bruiser and Jaws choked out sobs, their cries flooding the room as they were unable to form words. And Blanche. Blanche was beyond broken. 

Max turned his head back to Syrena. She had gotten him in the weak points of his armor, piercing down into his heart. She watched, her face expressionless, as his sweet face, still smiling softly at her, became still as he slumped onto the ground. His wonderfully warm eyes faded into nothingness. 

A life for a life.

“NO!” Blanche screamed, trying in vain to get up. All he saw was red, all he felt was pure agony and hatred as Syrena slowly pulled her hands back, revealing the red covered blades. “No!” 

Fenn put her vibroblade to his neck, “You clones just don’t know when to shut up do you?” 

“Back off Fenn,” Syrena said weakly, unable to tear her eyes from Max’s body. She hurt all over and her side stung. 

“Maybe I’ll have to make you shut up,” Fenn laughed, ignoring Syrena. 

“I said back off!” Syrena shouted, Force pushing Fenn away from Blanche and the others. She was on her feet in an instant, ignoring the dizzying pain on her side and head. “We got what we came here for, now let’s go.” 

“Syrena’s right. They’ll be fully online and operational soon,” Alyze said. 

Fenn grumbled curses under her breath before putting away her vibroblade. She bent down and picked up Nettie’s body, slinging it over her shoulder with ease. They would need to give her a proper burial, a Heretic’s goodbye. 

She stopped by the Sunburst Squadron on her way to the blast doors, sneering at them. She was enjoying their pain. Enjoying how they seemed unable to process what happened. Bruiser and Jaws cried for their fallen brother as Sweets and Void began regaining consciousness. What a sight to wake up to: the body of their beloved sergeant dead in front of them and a seething Blanche. 

Fenn grabbed Max’s helmet from the ground, tossing it once in the air before smiling ruefully at Syrena, “A nice trophy, don’t you think?”

Before Syrena had the chance to lunge at her, Alyze wrapped their large arm around Syrena’s middle again to keep her from falling. She hadn’t even realized that she was losing balance. Her wound needed immediate medical attention.

Syrena didn’t look at the Sunburst Squadron as the three Heretics made their way out of the room. She didn’t watch as they scrambled to Max’s side, didn’t see Blanche’s binded hands grab his face. She tried to block out their cries and broken Mando’a, but their words and pleas for Max to wake up invaded her mind. It would be the sounds to haunt her dreams for the rest of time.

Alyze pressed the button on the controls for the blast doors, the heavy metal doors slowly shutting behind them to lock the clone troopers in the room. Syrena, with the last of her fleeting strength, waved her hand, sending a burst of Force energy to the troopers. All at once, their bindings fell to the ground, allowing them to hold each other and hold Max. 

The blast doors closed with a loud bang and all Syrena felt was pain and regret.

[ninjastormhawkkat]

My Crazy Wordgirl Theory #2

I will get to writing stories for my version of the Becky Boxleitner au. I just really need to get this out of the way. After going through sites for the canon facts of the Wordgirl television series and re-watching old Wordgirl episodes to help me write some stories for my version of the au, I sort of discovered something interesting. In a scene from “The Rise of Miss Power” we see an image of a male and female Lexiconian superhero duo painted on the ceiling of the room in the episode special. Now about everyone in the fandom has speculated that image is a painting of her biological parents, or an idea of what her parents would look like. But what if that were not true? What if that painting was just a symbolic image of what the humanoid people on Lexicon typically looked like? Back in the episode, “Wordgirl Makes A Mistake”, Becky mentions that she accidentally crawled onto the ship of Captain Huggy Face, a famous (Lexiconian) Air Force Pilot when she was really little. For about 10 or 11 years, Bob and Becky have been raised on earth with no attempts to get back to Lexicon, and no one from Lexicon has come to find them. I am not trying to paint Becky’s biological parents in a bad light, but why was no Lexiconian searching for their lost child? From looking at Wordgirl’s Spaceship Hideout, it appears that people from Lexicon have the technological resources to track down the crashed ship of a famous pilot and find him and a lost child. This would take them only a few years. Also looking at Wordgirl’s origin story, it seems that Lexicon is not lightyears away from Earth or Becky and Bob would have been a bit older than when they were found in the origin flashback. (I know it is a cartoon, but some rules of science still apply to the show). I don’t know how far the planets are from each other but I think they exist in the same solar system if indicated by the alien tech that Lexiconians are able to travel faster to planets without aging much. Again I ask if this is possible, then why has no one come to rescue Becky and Bob? What if it was because Becky was meant to have crawled onto Huggy’s ship and never be found? We don't know the strength of Lexiconian’s memory at a young age. We know they can remember everything they read since Becky knows every word in the dictionary, but we don’t know how early they maintain a photographic memory. I believe that Bob may have told Becky the story about how they came to earth when she was old enough. From watching that scene, we can assume Becky only has memories of crawling onto a ship and falling asleep, then waking up to a startled pilot. Bob even has no clue how a child with no business being near a spaceship about to take off so he tells her what he only knows. Could it be Becky was never meant to be found by anyone else from Lexicon? Why so? Why hide from a planet of heroes? Here is where the conspiracy I formulated in my head starts. Let’s consider this question: What if Becky was only half Lexiconian?

We first need to look at Lexicon’s political structure. About everyone who has watched or watches the show must have thought at one point that Lexicon was a planet of heroes which is why Becky wanted to use her powers for good and become a superhero at an early age. What we may not realize is that the term hero could apply differently on Lexicon than on Earth. In the flashback of Wordgirl’s origin, Becky refers to Huggy as a famous air force pilot. He is even called Captain Huggy Face. Also in the special, “The Rise of Miss Power”, Huggy gives Wordgirl a book titled Super Advanced Secret Battle Moves of the Planet Lexicon in order to help her in the final battle against Miss Power. Now I don’t know about you, but this makes me think that Lexicon had some type of military control and the term hero on their planet was a military term. One of the statues of a Lexiconian in that special was wearing a Roman-style helmet, something a soldier in the Roman army would wear. I don’t know if Lexicon has a military government or just a government with a strong military influence. I don’t know what type of rule Lexicon has, but it definitely has a military of some sort. From the statues and painting we seen of Lexiconians, Wordgirl’s outfit is typical outer clothing for Lexicon. This also sparks an idea of a common uniform for Lexicons which would make sense if there is some type of military influence on the planet. This ties into my theory about Becky. Now from what I have learned about aliens from all the sci-fi themed shows and movies such as Doctor Who and Monsters Vs. Aliens, most aliens seem to view the human race as a lesser species compared to them. We can see that with how Miss Power acted toward the villains and the citizens. Even though she was not a Lexiconian, Miss Power still viewed everyone as lesser and as servants to herself. In my opinion with Kid Math, before Wordgirl set him straight, he seemed to view heroics as a game or something interesting that he could copy for himself. He was friendly, but he appeared to take what Becky was teaching him about being a normal kid as a learning experience at first. I don’t know if this also applied to Lexiconians, but I think that due to the implications of military themes shown in the series, there are some that might have had a purity complex. There could have been Lexiconians might have wanted only their species to be the “heroes” and keep that in their own bloodline. I don’t think every Lexiconian held that belief since in one episode we see Bob on a date with Bosco, but maybe some in higher social classes strongly believed in purity, or would never consider marrying a human. With the evidence of military themes, it is possible they have class structures on Lexicon. Now what if a high class Lexiconian, broke that purity thinking and mated with a human. Here is my theory on Becky’s Parentage.

A woman from Lexicon, someone with military training like huggy has and in a high position, was put in an arranged marriage with someone she did not love at all nor could ever love. This person, a military man, possibly with a higher rank than the woman and have strong familial ties on Lexicon, was a corrupt person. She tried everything she could to get out this arranged marriage, but even her family was pushing her to do it because of reasons such as tradition or importance of appearance or something that only concerns them and not the woman. The woman soon takes an exploration opportunity and uses it to get away from all the drama she is facing and for her own mental and emotional health. She soon lands on planet earth, specifically a place called Fair City, and explores around for a while. This woman soon spots a distracted human male about to cross onto a busy road. This woman already has a good nature and quickly pulls the man out of danger without anyone noticing her unusual super speed. The man, grateful, turns to thank the woman. According to how love works from the Hotel Transylvania movies, they immediately zinged. This man and woman get to know each other a little bit more over the time the women was allowed to stay away from Lexicon. She does not give every detail about herself (her alien background), but she feels free with this man who respects her emotions and loves her for her. They get more intimate over months and everything is going great. Then she feels ill one day and under the guise of going to a hospital, the woman goes back to her ship for a medical scan. To her surprise, she is pregnant with her boyfriend’s child. This is bad because her time on exploration is about to be up and if she returns any time later, they will find about about her hybrid offspring and her corrupt fiance may kill her and her child as “punishment” for finding true love. She doesn’t have the option to not come back because they can and will do anything to find her and this would put her lover in danger as well. With a heavy heart she soon leaves her lover and returns to Lexicon and marries her corrupt fiance. She does this to protect her lover and child. This woman soon gives birth to a daughter that has her human father’s eyes with her mother’s facial features, hair color and style. The top parted bangs is a possible mixture of her human father’s and Lexiconian mother’s hair style. Her husband soon becomes suspicious about his wife’s time away and “their” child. About a year later, her husband discovers the child’s human lineage and goes into a dark rage. This woman hurries and escapes the dome city she lived in and soon encounters Captain Huggy Face about to take off. She sees that her husband and his men are about to catch up with her. She puts down her child and urges her to walk towards the ship. In a last ditch effort to save her child, she sacrifices herself and holds back her husband and his men long enough so the ship takes off and there is nothing that can be done. The fate of the woman is unknown.

In regards to Becky’s human father, let’s go over some canonical evidence. It says on the Wordgirl wiki that Becky has light brown skin. I believe Becky might be biracial. She could possibly be an offspring of an African American Woman and a white ethnic man. I googled what biracial kids look like and Becky looks similar to a biracial child born of a African American parent and a white ethnic parent. (I don’t know the what proper term I should use for referring to White ethnicity and I do not want to offend anyone by accident.) (I am just basing my conspiracy theory on visual evidence and scientific fact.) For about everyone, except one person, on Wordgirl, they have black eyes. I have seen fanart of the characters with different eye colors. For Becky’s dad, while I agree he could have blue eyes, it is also possible for him to have brown eyes as well, the eye color Becky inherited. Another thing I noticed that Becky could have inherited from her human father is his personality. Let’s review Becky’s personality and behaviors. Becky does not enjoy her family singing on the road or doing about any family car activity on a constant loop. Though not often, Becky is able to use gadgets and seems to have an understanding of how each part should work in a machine. She was able to make sure the egg and apple slicer that was entered in the Young Inventor’s competition was able to still function as intended after pressing them together using her super strength. Another thing is that she gets irritated when the spotlight is taken off her every time she accomplishes something as Wordgirl such as with Tiny Big and Granny May when she was an undefeated bingo champion. Wordgirl/Becky also tends to get a bit sassy when she is irritated just like her dad. She also acts proud of herself and her accomplishments as Becky and Wordgirl which border on the line between humble and prideful. Like her dad she does get distracted and a little absentminded such as when she leaves Huggy behind after a crime or when she gets too focused on her interests such as Pretty Princess and boy crushes. There are times when Becky wants to accomplish something, either for her own desires or to just impress people, she will become inconsiderate of others. Examples include Becky interrupting Violet’s rehearsal for the Romeo and Juliet play and revealing Scoop’s personal tooth secret when she took over running the school’s paper for a day. Becky also sometimes feels she “needs to always be the winner”. It can be assumed that she copies that behavior from Tim Botsford who gets very competitive and upset when his family does not win. The thing is that Tim is almost immediately humbled afterwords when he puts into perspective that he did his best and is a winner in his family’s and his own eyes. Becky may also share that perspective sometimes, but she will still tend to fret over her mistakes until someone calms her down. As I said, Becky sometimes still needs to feel as the winner, more so in her battles as Wordgirl against villains. We have also seen Becky feel upset when people don’t like her work such as when Violet and Bob hid Becky’s horrible painting in the janitor’s closet when they were decorating the school gym for a dance while Becky was fighting evil as Wordgirl. Becky is also seen to be clever and tricky when she needs to such as in the episode “Bend It Like Becky” when she was trying to get Dr. Two Brains to agree with a soccer match that would determine which group was going to enjoy the field for the next 3 months.

One final thing before I finish is that throughout some episodes, we can see Becky similarly imitate her human dad’s facial features and body gestures when he is there. Now I leave off with this question. Do Becky’s personality and behaviors I mentioned remind you of any cheese loving, villain scientist? I will let you think about it.