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[book-o-scams]

Ed, Edd n Eddy Series Bible (1996) -Analysis-

You can all finally read/download Ed, Edd n Eddy's official Series Bible right here! Thanks again to Chuckletons for sharing this with me and to Joey/Kongiscool0518 for sharing it in the first place, the Holy Grail of lost Ed, Edd n Eddy trivia!

One of the first posts I made for this blog was the Series Bible page. It was a composite of every source we had ever seen reference the series bible so far-- storyboarders in interviews, CN's old character guides, and the biggest source, an old CN UK posting about the show. Well, I figure now that we have the official source, I better update the old page (so everyone knows it's out of date), and make this new Series Bible post using the official source! Not much new information, but I was intrigued to finally learn the true phrasings of some things we had only heard paraphrased, as well as at least one detail from the movie that I couldn't believe came up this early in conception...

Unfortunately, Tumblr has apparently updated its post system to only let me add 10 images? Gonna try and only use images for what I need since you can read the actual document above, I guess I'll transcribe it too for easier reference and so we don't ever lose some archive of this.

Quickly, let's review what a series bible is:

A series bible is how creators pitch shows to networks. They can be called “pitch bibles” as well. Bibles do not usually get posted publicly, because they are initially under a strict Non-Disclosure Agreement by the network; also the creator may simply not wish to share it because it reflects the earliest stages of development.

The pitch materials typically include early concepts for characters, locations and episodes. Sometimes it exposes secrets, in this case, Ed and Eddy’s home lives, and sometimes the stuff in it is completely abandoned because it’s so early in production, in this case, casual references to school and adults.

Alright, everybody, it's time to gather 'round and read the Ed, Edd n Eddy Bible!

THE YEAR IS 1996.

YOUR NAME IS LINDA SIMENSKY. YOU WORK AT CARTOON NETWORK. A FRIEND OF YOURS, DANNY ANTONUCCI, IS WRAPPING UP A SHOW ON MTV. YOU GET THIS FAX.

Linda Simensky immediately fell in love with this concept because as a child, she was best friends with 2 other Lindas for seemingly no reason other than the shared name.

I love how Danny decided last second to pencil in the correct names over each Ed, since they're arranged out of title-order.

"They're friends because they have the same name."

-the Logline for the series.

Fun fact: one storyboard artist for the movie observed that the movie is essentially all about challenging the series' original notion that the Eds are friends ONLY because of their name.

"A Danny Antonucci Cartuna"

-the label Danny used to use under announcements of new productions.

PAGE 1:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

They're best friends because they have the same name.

A gag laden, beat generated CARTOON bumper car ride of 3 misfit youths on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America.

Through summer vacation, part-time jobs, or just hang'n out at the corner mail box, they want to belong....but CAN'T.

From home chores, helping neighbors or eating jaw breakers, they want to fit in...but CAN'T.

Ed is into "B" monster movies, model kits and is quick to break out into rashes.

Lots of luck...

Edd is into chemistry, biology and prone to crushes.

Later...

Eddy is into pranks, is stylish and flaunts himself to the world.

Ya Right...

Ed, Edd n Eddy is a show about confusion and contradiction, that awkward part of youth, pimples, big feet, oily hair and... girls???.

Puberty is unforgiving.

I was fascinated by the lack of art on this page, it makes the pitch feel very focused. AKA logo in the corner, the title logo again up top, then the logline appears again below.

I really love the breakdown of Danny's vision of the show. "Gag-laden, beat-generated, CARTOON bumper ride." Very accurate, and I think "beat-generated" is the phrase that interests me the most. I typically think of "animation beats" as sort of a give-in-- technically all things fit a rhythm, so all stories are essentially just a montage of beats. But this does make me realize how important the strength of the beats and their rhythm are to the pacing of a cartoon and making you feel like "that was a good one." I feel like the "seasonal rot" viewers feel over the course of a show, and the way that perception differs from person to person, depends on the type of beats you want. Even though I am very into the experimental beats of a show in its later seasons, I can definitely see how season 1's beats are more typically appealing to a wide-audience, and how important a focus on that is to the longevity of a show.

I found it really interesting how the scams are initially conceived of here as "summer jobs." It adds to the sense that adults were originally meant to be present. Honestly a little surprised nobody with access to this bible had ever thought to mention that-- scams are not referenced ANYWHERE. Their image in the Series Bible is that they have summer jobs and help neighbors, which is certainly a much cleaner reputation than the Eds ended up with in the show. Makes me realize though, were some of the early scams, like Ed's Hive Bee Gone and their newspaper routes, supposed to be leaning into this early idea of them with almost legit jobs for unseen adults?

I was very amused by the repeated phrase that the Eds simply CAN'T fit in.

Loved to finally see the official phrasing for the confirmation that Peach Creek is in America. Not much different than I was led to believe, but still nice to have the true quote.

Also love Eddy being described as "stylish and flaunting himself to the world." The bold-print reactions to each micro-description is a cute idea too, I truly wonder who we were meant to picture saying those things in reaction. Each Ed? Kevin?

The "corner mail box" is an oddly specific phrase-- the Eds do hang around mailboxes throughout the series, especially seasons 1-3, and I believe the canon map does have a corner mailbox, but the idea that the Eds hang out at one specific mailbox went the way of Bro's supposed secret treehouses.

PAGE 2:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

Show Description

Gag laden. True cartoon style, inventive, non parody, fast paced, stretch and squash

Beat driven. (even when characters stop they hold with a bounce cycle. Adults never bounce. Music can play important part, not just fill.) But not a musical.

Cartoon surrealism. (viewers see the show as Ed, Edd n Eddy would, less important things tend to blend into the background, while objects of Ed, Edd n Eddy's desires are focused. Premise driven.)

The school year's over, (yeah!!!!) and the long HOT summer vacation begins (gulp). What to do?

Stuck on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America is the last place you want to spend summer break, especially when you find life confusing and contradicting.

Ed, Edd n Eddy is about friendship, and serves to remind us that they're no "good ole days," just smelly runners.

You can tackle anything, when your with your pals.

Their days are spent, for knowledge, acceptance and some cash for jaw breakers. Armed with pimples, big feet and oily hair the three amigos trek into the unknown.

Ed, Edd n Eddy are dying to be grown-ups, but they're kids, and attack adulthood as only kids would. Simple situations turn into a manic rollercoaster ride. (Don't forget your barf bag).

They just want to belong, and they're willing to pull off any insane stunt to prove it. First they need to figure out what it is they want to belong to.

Found it interesting that on this page, the show's logo is replaced with the title written in a jumbled font. Seems like the font from the show's end credits.

Hehe, the continued reactions to the descriptions. Allow me to be Double D for a moment and point out the increased use of parentheticals on this page, as well as one wrong "your".

I love Danny's insight that season 1 is framed by the context of how hyped everyone still is just to be out of school, but also the sense of pressure to make use of their break.

I really appreciate Danny getting further into the details of his summary of the show's style on the previous page. It only makes sense that he had this much of a vision that early.

A second confirmation of the cul-de-sac being in America! I'm also really into the repeated focus on the Eds finding the world "contradicting." I always loved how EEnE's inexplicable cartoon antics supported that sense that the Eds are highly aware of contradictions in both societal things and the actual characters.

WOW, so I'm fascinated by this dual reveal. Before the wiggling outlines, which Danny usually calls a "boiling line" and describes as a tribute to wiggling inking in early animation, the series bible instead refers to him wanting the characters to do the iconic Fleischer "bounce," which is a much more commonly recognized rubberhose animation technique. Very interesting that Danny decided not to stick to that. Did it feel too out of place? Or was the overseas team not willing to animate a weight-shifting for every single held pose? Haha, guess I can see why boiling was an easier compromise. I wonder if he had any other ideas for how to make it more of a 1930s cartoon.

The other reveal to me here is that the movie's choice, that adults don't always wiggle in the show, was an idea from the very beginning! I guess I can better understand now why it's just too difficult to communicate a stylistic choice like that overseas-- no point making Bro not wiggle, that'd just create confusion.

Also, really disappointed that my wish for a musical is officially squashed in the series bible itself. That's a tragedy. The show's over, ya couldn't let me dream, Danny!? Conversely, I love Danny's forethought to say "non parody," I definitely noticed and appreciated EEnE's avoidance of derivative parody humor.

My spouse had to point out to me that Danny probably means sneakers here, lol. Canadianisms!

The comments about the Eds wanting to grow up but needing to figure out what they want to belong to are so great and relate to the movie so well. I've heard those comments before, but the correct phrasing was cool to see.

PAGE 3:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Ed in right corner)

Character Description

Ed

Attention deficiency syndrome.

He has trouble...

He can't....um...

OK, he draws all day in class.

When Eddy gets a bright idea...Ed's in.

Ed is easily talked into doing Eddy's "hard work". He has great physical strength.

Ed's happiest with his Model kits and B-monster movies. He draws his knowledge from his movies.

Ed smells. Flies are attracted to him.

Ed has sayings for all situations

ED: "you can change your shirt, and Bingo was his name..."

Ed's perpetually a slave to his younger sister's whims and whines.

Ed may have to baby-sit his sister, or let her watch whatever she wants on TV, or let her dress him up in mom's clothes.

Ed breaks out in Rashes. He's allergic to practically everything, especially Guinea Pigs.

Ed's Mom xerox's his sketches and doodles for her therapist.

Ed's Dad hopes to pass on to his son, his knowledge on "pre-owned" auto sales.

Very cute bit wasting the space at the top of the page. Danny seems very invested in Ed's personality already. The old sources we used to have definitely tried to condense these down to simpler blurbs.

Weird how Danny wants to essentially diagnose Ed with ADHD here (phrasing it very poorly, but it was the 90s and... Canada?). I don't know enough on the subject to debate it, but I still gotta point out Ed's canonical cracked skull!

Interested in the comment about Ed being most allergic to Guinea Pigs. I don't think that animal was ever even mentioned in the show. Eddy mentioned an old gerbil once....

Neat to finally have the real phrasing of the official word on Ed's parents! I saw someone comment earlier that this seems to be hinting Ed's Dad is selling stolen cars. I've never thought to question the legality of his apparent second-hand-car dealership (I imagined he works with Eddy's dad, who has received a legitimate award for his salesmanship), but those quotation marks are certainly making Mr. Ed's practices questionable! Best case scenario, Danny meant that more like italics or something, but maybe Ed's dad IS up to no good...

PAGES 4 & 5 (Ed's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 6:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Edd in right corner)

Character Description

Edd

is really smart.

is really quiet.

Edd is unnaturally-- polite.

Edd hasn't been allowed to take gym ever since the Dodge ball incident. He's been excused to free study time in the library.

Edd doesn't like it when people touch his things.

EDD: "You may enter in my room, but don't touch my Lego robot. Thank you."

Edd's learning to play Peddle steel guitar. (his Mom makes him)

Edd's prone to "crushes". Girls in School, in his neighborhood, TV, anatomy books. He mails "true loves" his socks.

Edd is always ready for action, even though he can calculate the implications.

Edd constantly mumbles.

No one ever sees Edd's parents. They both work nights. They communicate to their son solely through Post-it notes. Edd's not allowed to touch anything in the house while they're gone. Anything.

Interesting how Danny slightly differentiates the barely-used space at the top here from Ed's description, to characterize Edd as more quiet and mumbly, adding an awkward "--" mid-sentence, perhaps to create the impression that Edd halts to choose words carefully.

Everything on this page feels familiar, from the character guides and other old sources. The most interesting thing to me here is that Edd's Mom forcing him to practice Pedal Steel Guitar is established this early, don't think I knew that, but I had noticed that it existed in his room from ep 1.

I love how the explanation in the beginning for why Edd goes along with their dumb schemes even though he's smart is basically just "he's always ready for action." ?!? I guess in a way???

That weirdly phrased Edd quote amuses me because it references Lego, just like the original concept background for his room before somebody nixed the copyright-namedrop.

Edd's prone to crushes thing has been reaffirmed over and over in character bios even though it really doesn't come up outside of the cupid magic in HPH and the pilot-episode heart eyes at Sarah that are barely canon. Still, I've always loved the truly disturbing statement that he mails "his true loves his socks" and how that managed to make it into canon with a comic book example, a cel animation example and a digital era example.

PAGES 7 & 8 (Edd's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 9:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Eddy in right corner)

Character Description

Eddy

Exhibitionist.

Megalomaniac. (quote from his report card)

Eddy is the unofficial leader of the trio.

He's always got a plan, a stunt or a weird noise.

Eddy's the "class clown". He loves showing off. He loves being the centre of attention-- no matter how stupid the reason is.

Eddy is the only kid in his grade to have been expelled for aw hole week from school. It was his turn to set up the video for science class. He switched "Our Friend Yeast", for a video he "borrowed" from his parent's room.

Before Eddy's brother went....away, he enlightened Eddy with the "legends" of the neighbourhood. Eddy knows where all the abandoned tree houses are, which sewer pipers are safe to spelunk, and the secret recipe for the "El Mongo Stink Bomb" (it's been in the family for years).

He is the one who is most able to pretend that he knows it all... and doesn't care what anyone else thinks about him.

His genes are working the fastest.

Eddy's Dad is constantly concerned that Eddy may grow up to be a ...figure skater.

Eddy's Mom never believes his little darling was involved in such a heinous act.

Funny choice that Eddy's wasted-top-space is just two one-word descriptions, and allegedly lazily swiped from his negative report card.

Wow, we knew the report card quote and the "Our Friend Yeast" story from the UK show guide, but now we also know Ed's page says that Ed draws in class, and now I realize that Ed and Eddy have series bible school blurbs to match Edd's classic dodgeball incident blurb. Anyway, it's great that Eddy's showed his entire school some sort of sex video his parents have.

Very interested that the phrasing for the Bro/El Mongo Stink Bomb blurb even seems to suggest it's a family recipe. Eddy's Dad did have prankster stuff in his closet in JJJ... did Bro learn his prankster ways from Dad?? The neighborhood's secret tree houses have come up in other descriptions (at best, I'd say this could be related to that creepy shack the Eds found in the woods), but I think it's new info that Eddy personally learned the sewer routes from Bro. Interesting...

Thankfully, I had already heard about the Bible's awkward reference to Eddy being the most pubescent as "his genes are working the fastest," lmao.

Once again the Double D in me comes out to point out that the description of Eddy's Mom seems to switch to the Dad's pronouns.

PAGES 10 & 11 (Eddy's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGES 12-14 (Sarah, Jimmy, Rolf, Jonny, Nazz, and Kevin lineup of all 6, then 2 zoomed in lineups of the first 3 kids and last 3 kids)

(Funfact: the kids' designs were allegedly freelanced to an outside studio, hence why their refined later-season designs are so different from these lizardy starting places, lmao)

PAGE 15: (images of Sarah and Jimmy next to their blurbs)

SARAH

Ed's baby Sister.

It's her way or the Highway.

She has everything done for her, if NOT she'll "make" them do it.

She can be quick to judge.

Whinney.

A tatrum for every occasion.

More than a handful for Ed...or Edd and Eddy.

Thinks Edd is kinda cute.

Wants Eddy to MOVE...to another planet.

JIMMY

Sarah's best friend

He is always playing with girls, boys are just too tough.

He is accident prone, when ever we see him he has a different affliction, ie: band-aids, patches, casts, lumps...etc.

He is very clean.

The Ed's frighten him, "They're such brutes".

I'm surprised how much of the UK guide was accurate to what was really in the bible for them! Also surprised Danny misspelled "whiney" and "tantrum," one right after the other. Is this how Sarah spells them? ...Sorry, Danny, I yam what I yam.

PAGE 16: (images of Rolf and Jonny next to their blurbs)

ROLF

First generation of a landed immigrant family.

Nationality not important.

He's proud of his heritage.

He has peculiar traditions and/or customs.

He eats "weird" things.

He has hair on his back..... "yuck".

He confuses the Ed's to no end.

He confuses the other kids to no end.

JONNY 2x4

He is a wanderer and very inquisitive

From early morning to supper time, he is always outside playing, with his buddy, "Plank".

"Plank" is a wooden board that Jonny drew a face on with a crayon.

Jonny has wonderful conversations with Plank. ...Plank is a piece of wood.

Jonny makes himself very "accessible" to the Ed's.

Found it interesting that Rolf's bio is less clearly phrased than the UK bio set it up to be-- there they made it sound more like he mixes up who the Eds/kids are, here it's unclear whether it means that or (more likely) just means the obvious statement that everyone finds him confusing. If it's that, what a lame hollow bio Rolf got. This kid's based on you Danny, show some of that personal side!

Always loved Jonny's description, his life sounds so cute. Playing outside literally all day. Interesting to have it confirmed that Jonny drew Plank's face, I preferred to think the Eds drew him and sold him to Jonny, but whatever.

"Accessible" has always been an important vague description of Jonny to me. It really only applies to how chummy they could be with him in season 1, but it still sorta applies to his personality throughout the series as well.

PAGE 17: (images of Nazz and Kevin next to their blurbs)

NAZZ

She's cool, calm and assertive.

She is the most matured of the kids, or so she thinks.

She's into make-up and fashion magazines and Boys.

Sarah thinks she's awesome, wants to be just like her when she grows up.

When she enters a scene, all activity stops... boys freeze, they sweat, their hearts beat faster and faster. They lose their ability to talk. When she leaves, they recover and conclude it was something They ate.

She thinks the Ed's are funny.

KEVIN

He is cynical and sarcastic.

He thinks he knows the "routine". That's because he watches "60 Minutes".

It got a big laugh out of me that Kevin's description is only 2 sentences long. Nazz even has a more detailed character description from inception than Kevin. Love this for them.

Who's the Eds' rival? Well, he's cynical, sarcastic and he watches 60 Minutes, doesn't that tell you enough!?

I love the "mature... or so she thinks" remark about Nazz, a grounded flaw for her to have, being a little overcommitted to being mature like Eddy. It also perhaps suggests naiveté that makes it a little more reasonable that they didn't notice they were dumbing her down at the end of the series, but I do think the movie version of her better reflects the Bible's concept.

PAGE 18:

The Other Neighborhood Kids

Lineup of May, Lee and Marie.

The Kanker Sisters

These gals are tough. They bother, bully, provoke and bewilder everyone.

They live in a motor home park on the other side of the Cul-de-sac. The other kids have never been there.

They are proud of their Tammy Faye Baker memorabilia.

Their project "Cooking with Ketchup" closed down their school for a whole week.

No one likes them, especially the Eds.

They are determined to marry the Eds. They want them to do their dishes.

Amused that the Kankers are essentially being labeled backgrounds characters here, the role they mostly fell into in season 5. "Other" neighborhood kids...

I love that the Kankers have a school blurb to match each of the Eds', and that theirs has similar destructive-intentions to Eddy's video premiere story.

I believe all of this was all known from the UK guide as well, but still, neat stuff!

PAGES 19 & 20 (zoomed in Kanker lineup and their height chart with the Eds)

PAGES 21 & 22 (early promo art that used to be on CN's old Eds webpage, the art of the Eds eating jawbreakers at the end of ep 1 with the overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy love JAWBREAKERS!!!", and the art of the Eds all running with overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy see something shiny...."Jiggers." That weird "jiggers" statement at the end was normally edited out and I don't know what it means. Looked it up and it seems to be Chinook jargon (like when Ed said he was "skookum at X's and O's") usually said in the same sense as "CHEESE IT!")

PAGES 23+:

The rest of the pages in that bible download are from a 2004 storyboard test. The storyboard sample "It's Raining Eds," which we've seen some submitted samples of before, interpretations with Ed attempting to fly or chew gum and Edd making radioactive gum, I was surprised to find out the outline is just the original outline for the opening sequence to season 3's 'For Your Eds Only', seemingly Jonny was not written into the original outline (or was excised for easier testing purposes) but Kevin's brief cameo was. Now I wonder if they knew this would be used for a test when they wrote it, and if they would've come up with a less random way to include him if weren't forced to be a concise bit for testing's sake. (Your limit is typically 40 storyboard pages in my experience.)

I also noticed that in the included background references, the anonymous adult neighbor house next door to Ed's is officially just referred to as a "generic house."

My analysis ends here, but be sure to download that sometime and enjoy all the raw storyboard sketches at the end of the document!

[toutallyahoe]

Everybody Talks ~ Iwaizumi Hajime (Haikyuu) pt 1

requested by: --

a/n: i forgot to post this here, lmao whoops

but anyways, had to split this because tumblr cant support 7000+ words asdfghjkll

this is my longest one shot so far, please enjoy it. em begging thee

part one | part two | part three

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"Hey baby won't you look my way?

I can be your new addiction,"

There it goes again, the annoying song that he was already very familiarized with as it was the very same song that his soulmate had been listening non-stop for the past few days. Iwaizumi Hajime doesn't know if his soulmate had a different time zone than his (thirteen hours difference to be exact) or just a psychopath listening to the loud song for the whole night that the dark haired male could barely sleep. And it had been almost a week already!

"Hey baby what you gotta say?

All you're giving me is fiction,"

Hajime doesn't even understood the song that much despite it's catchy tune. It was in, on what he assumed, was english. Yes, it was very catchy song at first as the beat was very enjoyable and the singer had a nice voice— but listening to the song for almost one week straight? It can drive anyone insane. And Iwaizumi Hajime had to deal with listening to the song over and over again in non-stop repeat because of his (probably) psychopath soulmate listen to it in full volume.

"I'm a sorry sucker and this happens all the time,"

The dark haired male was rather a bit thankful that the volume of the song he was hearing was a bit bearable as whatever song anyone's soulmate was listening too, it was projected to the other about only eighty percent the noise. Still, the song was loud and Hajime wonders if his soulmate would go deaf with how loud the song was playing on their end. Well, if they weren't going deaf already.

"I found out that everybody talks,

Everybody talks, everybody talks,

It started with a whisper!"

Sighing, Hajime stared at the ceiling of his room, a small frown on his lips. God, his soulmate was lowkey an asshole for making him listen to the same song over and over again for the past few days. If he ever finds his soulmate, the dark haired male was sure to beat them up— or at least, be angry at them for making him listen to a song that he could barely sleep.

"And that was when I kissed her!

And then she made my lips hurt!"

Looking at the alarm clock on top of his nightstand beside his bed, the dark haired male let out another annoyed grunt as he saw the time. It was already midnight and he still had school to attend to tomorrow. Not to mention volleyball practice early in the morning aswell.

God, for a moment, Hajime hated the soulmate bond so, so much.

"I could hear the chit chat!

Take me to your love shack!"

But Iwaizumi Hajime also remembered that his soulmate rather had a nice taste in music that even made him listen to his soulmates favorite bands— or at least he assumes they were their favorite bands.

Hajime was stuck with the soulmate bond that let's him hear the song what his soulmate was listening too, and it reminded the dark haired male that his soulmate was somehow sharing a part of themselves to him.

"Mamas always gotta back track!

When everybody talks back!"

Sighing again, Hajime wished he would just smack his soulmate right now.

  

"Hey honey you could be my drug?

You could be my new prescription,"

Hajime let out an annoyed grunt as he just finished serving and stood outside the court. It was unfortunately out of bounds as he put too much pressure on hitting the ball, but Hajime could barely care about it right now.

"Too much could be an overdose!

All this trash talk make me itchin'!"

Jesus fucking Christ, it was practically by the end of the day, but his soulmate was still listening to the song? The dark haired male now fully believed his soulmate was a psychopath. Period.

"Oh my, my,

Everybody talks, everybody talks,

Everybody talks, too much..."

"Woah, losing your edge there ace!" Hajime turned his head to whoever had said those words and saw it was a fellow third year and (unfortunately) friend of his, Hanamaki Takahiro. The light brown (pink-ish?) haired male had an eyebrow raised towards him but an amused smirk on his lips with his arms crossed over his chest.

"You okay there? Or are you getting old already?" Takahiro snickered as Hajime rolled his eyes at the wing spiker. The light brown (salmon???) haired player was always a bit of a tease along with another third year, Matsukawa Issei. Speaking of the middle blocker, it seemed like the black haired middle blocker also decided to come and join on annoying the dark haired ace.

"You've been also more annoyed than usual," Issei pointed out as he stood next to his light brown (pastel pink???) haired friend with his arms crossed on his chest aswell. "Love the eye bags, by the way," Issei continued as he grinned while Takahiro snickered more at his comment.

"Oh, shut up," Hajime had grunted as he rubbed the temple on his head. The dark haired ace was already tired from the lack of sleep and practicing volleyball even if he do love the sport. He can't deal with his teams bullshit right now.

"Iwa-chan can't sleep because of his soulmate!" Yelled the volleyball captain of the males volleyball club of Aoba Johsai, Oikawa Tōru, who was unfortunately the dark haired male's best friend since childhood from across the court. How did he know what the three were talking about? No one would ever know other than knowing the captain enjoyed gossip and doesn't care if he even gets caught listening to conversations that doesn't include him. Oikawa Tōru had no shame.

Sighing again, Hajime was so fucking done. Of course the chocolate brown haired male would know about his soulmate problem even if he doesn't say anything about it. For some odd reason, Tōru had a sixth sense with him and his soulmate. How annoying.

"Because of your soulmate...?" Takahiro asked, confused. The confusion on his face was immediately then replaced with an amused look as a shit eating grin was replaced the smirk on his lips. Hajime already felt the headache coming.

"That's pretty kinky, not gonna lie," Takahiro said with no shame whatsoever. Obviously his imaginations running wild from the chocolate brown haired male's shout about Hajime and his soulmate. Issei could only chuckle at his friend's words as they both look at the dark haired ace who was slowly losing his sanity and patience.

"But seriously, Iwaizumi. What's the deal with your soulmate?" Issei asked. Finally something Hajime could actually answer and not be teased by the assholes that he calls his teammates and friends. Unfortunately.

"The dumbass hasn't stopped listening to this one song for almost a week now," Hajime grunted as he could still hear the said song in his mind.

"It started with a whisper!

And that was when I kissed her!

And then she made my lips hurt!"

"Really?" Takahiro said, a bit surprised that a measly song would annoy the dark haired ace. Sure, Iwaizumi Hajime was a bit of a hot headed person but he was a hot headed person who can control his temper— unless it's with Oikawa Tōru, then Hajime would not hesitate to beat the shit outta the chocolate haired captain.

"What's so bad with the song?" And it seemed like the black haired middle blocker agreed aswell as Issei asked that question. The taller male didn't know if he should congratulate their ace's soulmate for making the dark haired male so annoyed and irritated for the past few days or feel bad for Hajime.

"The song isn't the problem," Hajime huffed as he saw both Takahiro and Issei look at him with raised brows. Clearly wanting him to elaborate more since they were confused. Sighing, the dark haired male decided to just come out with it. "They just have been playing the song non-stop and it's driving me insane."

"I could hear the chit chat!

Take me to your love shack!"

"What's the song?" The light brown (peach?!?) haired male had asked. Curious on what Hajime's soulmate was listening to. Can you blame him though? Their ace seemed to be a bit secretive with his soulmate, even if they had been teammates and friends for years. Iwaizumi Hajime didn't seemed to like talking about his soulmate, either it be him not liking them or just likes his privacy. It was probably the latter but who knows?

Sighing again, Hajime gestured the two to follow him to the changing room. The practice was almost over anyways and both Takahiro and Issei had finished their serves earlier ago aswell. The dark haired ace was going to let the two third years hear the song he had been listening to for the past few days with his phone. Hajime, after all, downloaded the song his soulmate had been listening to non-stop.

  

"Mamas always gotta back track!

When everybody talks back!"

Arriving at the changing room with the two males tagging along, Hajime wasted no time going to his assigned locker and opened it up. Taking out his phone and unlocking it, Hajime immediately then went to his music app and searched the song his soulmate had forced him to listen to for almost a week.

"Never thought I'd live to see the day,

When everybody's words got in the way!"

Finding the song, the dark haired ace turned to both his friend and gave them a blank expression as he hit play on the song.

The familiar intro of the song played loud on the device's speaker and it didn't take long for the singer started singing the song that Hajime was song he could sing along perfectly from how much he had heard the song already. The dark haired male had practically memorized the lyrics of the song already and he wasn't even kidding.

"Woah," Issei whistled as he look at the song that was playing in Hajime's phone more closely. "Damn ace, you're soulmate has taste!" The black haired male said. Rather surprised and impressed to the song Hajime's soulmate taste in music.

"It's in english too," Takahiro pointed out. He then turned to look at Issei who looked at him aswell. The two seemed to be communicating without even saying anything, but seeing the furrowed eyebrows and small frown on their lips, Hajime knew what they were thinking.

"Your soulmate is probably in a foreign country..." Takahiro said as he looked back at the dark haired ace. A bit worried but the wing spiker seemed to force a grin on his lips. "That's so cool!"

"Yeah, you're pretty lucky to get a foreign soulmate ace," Issei said. "Imagine getting help with english!" The black haired male chuckled. The two friends continued on listing the positives of having a soulmate who can talk in english and joking about it.

The dark haired ace didn't seemed to listen to the two though.

Hajime knew that there was a huge possibility that his soulmate was in another country than where he was. Soulmates were rarely even in the same cities most of the time, so Hajime fully knows about him maybe not meeting his soulmate. Still, it still hurts to think that his soulmate was far away from him and probably would not meet.

Iwaizumi Hajime didn't considered himself as a hopeless romantic, but it had always been his dream to meet the other person who he had sharing music to since he was seven years old.

There were two reasons why Hajime hated sharing about his soulmates music taste. First was that it hurts to be reminded that Hajime would only hear the song his soulmate was listening to and most of the time those songs were in english and were too loud for his liking. Sure, his soulmate listened to some mellow song aswell like lo-fi and even taking note on songs he listened too aswell, but his soulmate seemed to enjoy the upbeat and loud ones a lot.

Second was that Hajime felt like the music he listened from his soulmate were sacred. It was a silly thing to think but for the dark haired ace, the music and songs his soulmate was listening too, it was only for him to listen to and only him alone.

God, perhaps Iwaizumi Hajime was a hopeless romantic. Or at least, a little bit of a hopeless romantic with how he thinks about some dumb songs his soulmate was listening too.

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next >

[house-of-cakes]

Jamais Vu 

Masterlist || Series Masterlist 

Prev || Next

Chapter 17:  Gimme! Gimme! Gimme

Jungkook x Reader: enemy to lovers AU

Word count: 2164

Warnings: Swearing and mentions of slight bullying

Premise: “There’s an opposite to déjà vu. They call it jamais vu. It’s when you meet the same people or visit places, again and again, but each time is the first. Everybody is always a stranger… Nothing is ever familiar” – Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

AKA Jungkook goes in search of the girl who got him expelled.

I feel so bad posting late that I wrote a bonus chapter 😅 the extra chapter will be out this weekend.

If you would like to give feedback or be tagged in this story please send me an ask/message 😊

Tagged list: @inspinkyring @betysotelo18 @kardia-apo-marmelada @casspirit0705 @preciouschimine @therealsugababe  @lucedelsole97 @deolly @lexy9716  @thesweetest-peas @sannsia​

Bright flashing lights…catchy retro theme songs…the loud cheers of victory from teenage boys and girls defeating their opponents – these were the ingredients that made up Y/N’s favourite place in the world. While Namjoon found comfort on the stage, she felt most at home under the glowing neon lights of Reload.

A few years ago, Y/N had found the arcade a by chance after she had “run away” from home. She had just had an argument with her mother about her appearance and after countless moments of nagging and insults she had finally snapped and left home without permission…it was her first act of rebellion.  

Y/N’s mother was fixated on looks and how a “lady” should behave and present themselves. She always claimed that Y/N she be focusing on her physical imagine instead of having her face hidden behind a computer screen. It killed her mother that her youngest child spent all of her free time working in a place she deemed to be so juvenile. Y/N knew this for a fact and if she was being honest it only added to the appeal of working there. The job didn’t pay much nonetheless she loved it just as much as she did the Magic Shop.

A young boy runs through the arcade and finds Y/N sat on top of an air hockey table (a privilege that only she was allowed). Her attention is focused on her phone, trying to keep tabs on her best friends who are working a job without her. It was not very often that she could not attend an appointment however her elderly boss had caught a cold and there was no one else to cover the busy Friday night shift.

“Noona.” The soft whimper of the young boy catches her attention. “What’s wrong, buddy?” She jumps off the table and kneels so that she is eye level with the child “A-an older-r b-boy…” his words are choppy as his small body shakes with sobs “Stole my game.” “That wasn’t very nice of him. Can you point him out so Noona can have a chat with him.” The little boy continues to whimper but with some comforting words of reassurance and 5 free game tokens, she is able to convince him to point in the direction of the most popular first-person shooter game towards the back of the arcade.

“Thank buddy, that was very brave of you. I promise you in 10 minutes the game will be free for you to play.” She wipes the last of his tears and ruffles his hair for good measure “Come find me soon, ok?” The boy sniffling boy nods as Y/N quickly makes her way to the other side of the room.

At the game Y/N stands off to the side of the machine and pauses to analyse the teenage boy and his skill. The teen would get easily flustered each time a surge of villains would rush after his character and he would frequently let out a string of cuss words whenever he missed his mark, he was an amateur and it showed.

Suddenly his life bar at the top right of he screen started flashing, indicating that his game would soon end if he was not careful with his energy. This must have been enough motivation for him to focus better because his kill streak went from 3 to 9 in almost an instance.  A wicked plan formed in Y/N’s head as she he went in for the last shot of the level.

“Hey!” she called out to him causing him to flinch and miss his target. This caused a fatal error as the enemy on screen took the opportunity to shoot his character right in the face. The teen let out a sound of frustration as the screen read ‘Game Over’ in giant letters and request more tokens to continue. Y/N waited for him to insert the coins before making her presence known in front of him.

“You stupid bitch! You made me lose my game.” He grumbled and lift his gun to continue playing. Y/N reached over to the power point behind the game and switched it off.

“Get the fuck out of my arcade.” She spat and point towards the exit “Reload has a strict no bullying policy so don’t think for a second you’re getting a refund on those tokens.” The teen didn’t bother arguing, he has realised his mistake when he figured out who she was and walked away looking rather embarrassed he had been called out in front of everyone on a busy Friday night. He was sure his class mates would all be talking about it come Monday morning.

The screen of the machine flickered back to life as Y/N switched the power back on, she waited to make sure that the unexpected reboot did not affect the game. The download bar reached the end of the bar and loaded the high score screen. She read over the listed and frowned when she got to a name that had been annoying her lately – Nochu.

This Nochu person had climb two positions high on the leader board since the last time she had checked this game and the achievement displeased her. That name was popping up on the leader boards of many games recently and while she did not feel her abilities were being threatened, she was annoyed that she could not put a face to this person.

Hours later back at the Kim residence, the two cousins enjoy the cooling weather on their porch as Jin attempts to tune his guitar by ear.

“The Basement wasn’t closed tonight.” Jungkook states when he scrolls through his Instagram feed and comes across a new post by the club “I never said it was.” Jin pays no attention to his cousin, instead he fiddles with the knobs at the head of guitar and plucks at a string once he believes he’s tightened the key enough. The sound rings out and the pitch is too high. “So why did we go to Reload instead?” Jin repeats the process with the chord again, the pitch is closer to where its supposed to be however the sound is still off. “None of the guys had a battle or a performance tonight.” He explained as he plucked at the string again and again, trying to pin point why it sounded wrong “And Y/N had to work, so we decided to hang with her instead.” “So we went for Y/N?” Jungkook tone was accusatory “No one forced you to tag along.” Jin fired back, he had stopped trying to tune the guitar to face him “She’s always supports the guys at the Basement, sometimes we repay the favour by making an appearance there to help drum up business.” Jungkook scoffed “You told me Reload was popular because she attracts people with her skills…if that’s the case why would she need you guys?” “She doesn’t need us at all.” Jin moved his guitar from his lap and lent it against his seat. He was frustrated with it and this conversation was adding to the stress.  “That’s the thing about having a good relationship with people…you do things to support them, even when they don’t ask.” “Oh yeah? If she’s so good why is she only ranked second on all the high scores.” Jin rolled his eyes at his cousin, he was being petty again and completely missed the point he was trying to make. “Mr S.K?” Jungkook nodded in confirmation.

Jungkook was becoming a regular at Reload and it was evident to him that Mr S.K was clearly the real champion of the joint. The guy had dominated every game of the arcade by holding highest score and while Y/N’s name always sat below his, her score was always miles away from meeting his. To Jungkook this was clearly another instance of Y/N receiving praise and adoration where it was not merited… it was Mr S.K who deserved to celebrated and yet it was Y/N who stole his popularity. If he had to come up with an explanation as to how this occurred, he would bet all his money it was because Y/N was considered to be “beautiful”.

“Mr S.K has held the top for as long as anyone can remember. There’s no mystery to who he is…He’s obviously the owner of the arcade.”  Jin windshield wiper boomed out and filled the stillness of the night as his cousin’s face fell. 

Jungkook pondered on the last few weeks, there was so much background information he didn’t know and for some reason his brain chose to fill in the gaps by somehow hating on Y/N.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car blaring loud music as it sped up and down the street.

“What the fuck is going?!” Jungkook exclaimed as he stood from his seat and made his way to the top of the porch stairs to get a better look at car. “Ah my Angel is home!” Jin jumped up and went to stand next to Jungkook. “Does she always carry on like this? She drives like a dipshit.” “Nah, that’s not even her driving. You see a while back she got caught at the illegal races, her parents made her sell her car as punishment... She must have gotten into a fight with her mother, this is how she always gets back her.”  

The car finally stopped doing laps down the street and pulled up into Y/N’s drive away. The pair watched as Y/N jumped out of the passenger side of the car and wave to the driver as they pulled away from the house. She was still unaware that she was being watched by them

“Hey Brat!” Jin called out, capturing her attention “Didn’t your mother ever tell you not take rides from strangers?”

Jungkook’s breathe hitched at the thought of Y/N allowing herself to be in a car with a stranger, especially someone who drove like a lunatic. He didn’t catch a glimpse of the driver but surely, she wasn’t reckless enough to put herself in such a dangerous situation…was she?

“She did, that’s what make’s it all the better.” Y/N bantered on smugly, Jungkook couldn’t figure out if she was joking or not. “Well it’s past your bed time young lady, you march right on inside and get right to bed.”  Y/N let out a sound of fake indignation and clutch her hand to her check overdramatically. “To think I raced all the way here with a surprise and this is how you treat me? You really are such a punk!” “A surprise?!” Jin’s eyebrows shot up in excitement, the façade dropped immediately. Everyone knew she gave the best surprises. “Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!” he demanded and waved her over to them. Y/N laughed at his eagerness and rummaged through her bag as she closed the distance between them.

“Sorry I didn’t have time to wrap it.” She purposely handed him a grey game cartridge face down so there was some kind of element of surprise to the gift. His eyes widen comically when he turned it over and read the title of the game. “Y/N…is this…??” For the first time in Jungkook’s life he had seen his loud mouth cousin speechless. “Yah! Don’t make a big deal of it.” She tried to brush it off “Consider it an extremely late birthday gift.” “Not a big deal? This is the original Super Mario Bros 3! I played this game every day as a kid then this idiot blew it up somehow.” He nodded his head in Jungkook’s direction who rolled his eyes in response.

The incident happened years ago and he still hadn’t heard the end of it, he pretended like it didn’t bother him but deep down he felt so bad for accidentally destroying something his cousin held so dear to him.

“I’ve been trying to find it ever since! This must have cost you a fortune.” “Like I said…it’s no big deal. I was cleaning out storage at work and found it packed away, we never got round to fixing game console for it so the boss-man was nice enough to let me have it.”

That was a bold-faced lie.

Y/N had known about the sentimental significance this game had to Jin and went in search for it many months before his birthday. She only managed to get the game after she traded a set of mint condition baseball cards, she had acquired as collateral when a client fell through their end of a deal.

“Y/NIEEE this is why you’re my angel! Thank you so much.” He pulled her towards him and wrapped her up in a big bear hug. Jungkook felt out of place as he watched Y/N shriek and attempt to struggle out of his grip as he showered her with love…he could help but feel jealous of the fact that she could fix a mistake that he had made so long ago.

[gladiatortale]

My DEPRESSION BEATING, fandom obsessing, shit-tastic FANTASTIC year in review!

TL;DR: I’m fixing my mental health and figuring out WHO THE FUCK I AM one fandom filled day at a time! Thank you to everyone who’s been there for me along the way. xoxo

what’s up HEATHENS.

stating the goddamn obvious here, it’s been a HELLUVA YEAR. One emotional rollercoaster after another but we’re ALMOST DONE. I know things aren’t gonna magically get better the second it flips to 00:01 on January first, but I’m excited to put this year behind me, and (SHOCKINGLY) a bit sad to see it go.

It was a year where the whole world completely stopped, we realized what is really important, what is really worth fighting for, and took a GODDAMN SECOND to just breathe.

For me personally, the year (which I’m counting off from November 1st) started out UNBELIEVABLY SHIT. I had just been kicked out of the country I called home for the last four years (thank you Brexit), I had ZERO job prospects, my depression was the WORST it had ever been, and I just didn’t want to get out of bed in the morning. And in the beginning, the pandemic felt like salt in the wound, an extra kick in the teeth to my early twenties that had already “failed to launch.”

But I tried to embrace the madness, really take advantage of the world (that I always thought moved to fast) properly slowing down, and take time to try and become myself again. I wanted to figure out what I loved and try and become a bit more like the person I was before my depression got so bad.

I often say I became that Manic Trash Planet Lady™ you see in sci-fi adventure films; a bit zany to say the least, with a million ideas and a very eclectic fashion sense, but embracing the insanity as it comes...

*cough cough* audrey, get to the goddamn point!

Right. lol. THE POINT IS! 

I’m not 100% “healed”, I’m not sure if I think depression is a “oh look you’re officially cured! hooray!” type of disease, but this year I let myself ENJOY SHIT for the first time in god knows how long. I still don’t know “wHaT i WaNt To dO WiTh mY LiFe”, but I’ve got a better idea and I’m heading in (what feels like) the right direction. And most of all, I can look back and say I am better than where I was a year ago.

So I wanted to say T H A N K Y O U to the mad lads on this website that introduced me to the fandoms, shows, movies, fics... THE SHIT that made me happy this year and were there to be one (BIG) piece in my healing journey.

AND SO, with out further rambling ADO! Here are the highlights of the year marked by my ridiculous hyper-fixations and OBSESSIONS. Thanks for putting up with me ya fiends, xoxox

November 2019  The Arcana (Visual Novel)

I had just gotten home and I was in a LOOOOOOW place. Randomly decided to download this app when it came up and it proceeded to ruin my life (and my bank account...) for pretty much the rest of the year. It was exactly what I needed to get me through a tough time and I was thoroughly, horse-blinders-up-to-the-rest-of-the-world, OBSESSED. These gorgeous magical fiends ruined me and all I could say was thank you.

Joined the fandom: November 2019 Obsession peaked: Late November Obsession faded: December 2019; I started a new job AND my bank statement came in and I realized I had accidentally spent over SIXTY BUCKS on this stupid app. No ragrets, but I definitely started to phase out at that point. Fandom friends: Velma, (@lanavxds on insta) miss you girlie xx Fanfics you NEED to read: ‘Second Mistake’ by DeathBelle on AO3, because DAAAAAYUM SON. Favourite moments: Basically the whole of the Julian arc. That gangly himbo OWNED my ass for a month.

December 2019 Hazbin Hotel (TV Series)

Y’ALL okay here me out. Am I proud of this one? No. Is the show crass as hell? OOOOOOOOHHHH YEAH. Did my angsty ass love it at the end of last year? DAMN STRAIGHT IT DID. Goes without saying, but this is NOT FOR EVERYBODY, but it definitely helped me along the way to becoming more comfortable with myself and being open about being the massive geek that I always was, and watching things I enjoy regardless of what people say about it.

Joined the fandom: December 2019 Obsession peaked: Shortly there after. Fandom friends: None. Dipped one toe in fandom discourse and then promptly YEETED the fuck outta there. Obsession faded: January 2019. Still curious to see the full series if A24 actually ever does produce the whole thing, but I have def moved away from it. Fanfics you NEED to read: Haven’t read any. Maybe I’m a pussy baby piece-o-shit, but I DID NOT want to go down that rabbit hole, NO MA’AM. Favourite moments:

Discovering the Hunicast podcast. These guys are a riot and Ashley is a flustered GEM. Even if you don’t watch the show, go watch an episode of these fucking LADS just dicking about and your day will get better.

Watching the first episode with my partner and watching him realize his girlfriend is a total freak.

January 2020 Lore Olympus (Webtoon Comic)

*Officially* discovered this one thanksgiving weekend in 2019, but my Arcana phase was still raging pretty strong at that point so I didn’t really get in to it until later. EVERYBODY AND THEIR MOTHER NEEDS TO READ IT. It has everything and handles the reality sexual assault and it’s aftermath EXTREMELY well.

Joined the fandom: Late November 2019 Obsession peaked: January 2020 Fandom friends: KELLEY. MA GIRL XOXOXO Obsession faded: June-ish 2020. I’m like 10 chapters behind now, but I still love this story so much. Fanfics you NEED to read: SO MANY ON MY ‘MARKED FOR LATER’ LIST AAAAAH. I have to get to that... NEW YEARS RESOLUTION lol Favourite moments: Having a drunk conversation on New Years Eve in 2019 with one of my oldest friends from high school about how much she loved it too. Helped me see how popular fandom and fandoms, are especially after feeling like I needed to hide my enthusiasm through high school and uni. (THAT WAS A MISTAKE BUT I’LL GET THERE IN A MINUTE).

February 2020 Versailles (TV Series)

SO FUCKING GAY Y’ALL. Oh my god everyone in this show is so gay. Even when they’re not they still are a little bit. AND BEST OF ALL!! it’s very historically accurate (except for the demon satanic nonsense in season 3, what was that???)

Joined the fandom: February 2020 Obsession peaked: Like??? The SECOND I finished episode one. Fandom friends: none... WHERE ARE ALL OF YOU??? Obsession faded: March 2020. It was a fast and passionate love affair, what can I say? Fanfics you NEED to read: IF YOU HAVE RECS, GIVE ‘EM TO MEEEEE. Favourite moments: 

Showing the first episode to a friend of mine and the *ungodly GASP* that came out of her throat was... PRICELESS.

The ENTIRE throuple(???) relationship between the Chevalier, Philipe, and Palatine. PLATONIC/ ROMANTIC LOVE G O A L S.

March 2020 Yuri!!! On Ice (TV Series)

*deep breath* ...y’all knew this one was coming.

Was I ready for this show to ruin my fucking life? No.  Am I so glad it happened??? FUCK YEAH.

NEVER IN MY LIFE have I fallen off the deep end so quickly with a fandom. HOLY SHIT. This blog didn’t have much of an “identity” before, but I you said that this is a Yuri On Ice blog now I wouldn’t even be mad (nor could I really defend myself to the contrary... bc??? like??? just go LOOK at my archive). Craziest thing is I watched the first two episodes like?? a solid TWO YEARS ago, but I didn’t continue watching because I was just not in the right head space for all the love and silliness and positivity.

I could do a whole separate post about how much this show and how this fandom has changed my life (DON’T TEMPT ME I JUST MIGHT). But I’ll stick with the highlights for now ;)

Joined the fandom: March 2020  Obsession peaked: Has it peaked?? Went straight up and it still going lol Fandom friends: Sandra, my mentor, my queen @aeriamamaduck, my fandom ride-or-die. Thank you for taking this internet bby under your wing. RACHEL @idancewiththefairies I TRAPPED YOU HERE. MUAHAHAHA xxx Obsession faded: ON GOING. CAN’T STOP, WON’T STOP. Fanfics you NEED to read: jfc, SO MANY.

‘Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches’ and ‘Of Bright Stars and Burning Hearts’ by Reiya @kazliin​ -- Rivals AU companion pieces. Longest fics I’ve ever read and JESUS CHRIST these two fucking SENT ME. Most popular YOI fics on AO3 for a REASON.

‘Tell Me Where Your Love Lies’ by @aeriamamaduck -- Royalty AU, trope-breaking ABO. Ah sweet, TMWYLL, how you’ve killed me over and over again. This BEAUTIFUL wip has SUCH amazing world-building idk where to start (Congrats on passing 50,000 hits!) EVERYONE GO READ IT.

‘Blackbird’ by sixpences -- WWII/Coldwar Spy Fic. I don’t have enough words to describe how amazing this is. It’s elevated to a higher plane beyond fanfic. Just go read it. Thank me later.

‘Zanka’ by rinsled05 @dreaming-fireflies -- The geisha fic that ruined me. *deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH *gasp* I’m fine. lol I sooooo not ready for this fic. Holy hell, Aoyagi had my heart in his hands from the first chapter. “’Please’ [...] ‘Don’t give me hope.’“ FUUUUCK.

‘Echoes’ by Reiya @kazliin -- Future fic. First fic I cried at... BOI. I was NOT ready for this. Shouldn’t be surprised given the author, but MAN. “‘A love like that, a love like what they had together, it never leaves completely.’ Yuri spoke again, eyes still staring out onto the ice, lost in memory. ‘There are always echoes.’” JUST FUCK ME UP.

Favourite moments: Oh good lord, where do I begin??

Having two (count ‘em TWO) main characters with mental health issues (Yuuri and his anxiety and Victor with burn out and depression) and NOT MAKING IT THE ONLY ASPECT OF THEIR PERSONALITY. CLAPS FOR KUBO AND YAMAMOTO!!

Everything about Yurio (ESPECIALLY HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH YUUKO AND HIS GRANDPA), that tsundere motherfucker is too pure for this world.

THE KISS. THE PROPOSAL. MY HEART WASN’T READY. AAAAAH!!

This fandom *properly* introducing me to smut on AO3...

Thinking I was going to get Rachel to like the show... NOT being prepared for her to fall off the deep end and START LIKING REAL SKATING TOO!!

Staying up waaaaaay too late waaaaaay too often to plan out plot points for TMWYLL with Sandra. Love ya dearie.

The warm fuzzy feeling I get every time I think about Victor and Yuuri.

April 2020 Bungou Stray Dogs (TV Series)

I had a hunch I was gonna like this show considering ALL of the characters are based off of famous classic authors from around the world... what I was NOT prepared for was just HOW MUCH I was going to love it. HOLY SHIT. The art style? Love it. The plot?? Bonkers, but so fun. THE VOICE CAST??? AMAZING. Highly recommend to anyone who wants to get in to anime, great place to start.

Joined the fandom: April 2020 Obsession peaked: Probably this summer? But we have DEF plateaued in a VERY high place. Fandom friends: FIJI. MA BOIIIII @lil-1nsane  Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Hope it doesn’t Fanfics you NEED to read: So so so many. The smut in this fandom is *chef’s kiss*, but here are a few...

‘He Works Hard For the Money’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- Sugar Daddy AU. FUCK MAN. I was not expecting to like this one, but bloody hell. This fic grabbed me by the throat and WOULD NOT let me go. Praying for chapter 16! But the author is working on another STELLAR fic so I’m okay for now.

‘Everything or Nothing’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- University AU. FUCK THIS FIC. Started reading it as I was waiting for HWHFTM to update and BOI, this fic ROCKS. The alternating POV fits so well with the enemies/idiots-to-lovers vibe. Solid 10 outta 10.

‘The City Where Wind Blows’ by @raven-rein​ -- Cancer Death fic. *pained shriek* AAAAAAGUUUUUUUHHHH *gasp* aaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHHH, FUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKK MEEEEE. THIS FIC. Only the second fic I’ve ever cried to but I BAWLED MY GODDAMN EYES OUT. FUUUUUUUCK. I was not ready, never would have been ready. This is so tremendously well done, it killed me so beautifully, 

‘Haunted by Hatred’ by DeathBelle -- Canon compliant Soukoku. It is a CRIME that DeathBelle doesn’t have more BSD fics on her page, but this one is still brilliant.

Favourite moments:

THE CHUUYA-DAZAI MAFIA REUNION TEAM UP WHEN THEY FIGHT LOVECRAFT. Ooof. BOI. We love it.

The first three episodes. Soooo many break neck plot twists.

Every insane hypothetical conversation with Fiji.

Every time Atsushi or Tanizaki is on screen bc I LOVE THESE LIL BEANS.

June 2020 Trash Taste (Podcast)

Goddamn I love these chaotic lads so much.

As I became more and more comfortable with myself and my love for anime I stumbled upon these three goons, -- Joey, Connor, and Garnt, -- best known for there SUPER successful (mostly) anime YouTube channels. Even if you don’t watch anime, WATCH/LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST. The focus is mostly on their lives and the overall expat/immigrant experience, with a bit of anecdotal anime references sprinkled in. 

This show is both wholesome and heathenous in equal measure, and after having lived abroad for a significant portion of my (admittedly still quite short) life, it was such a breath of fresh air to hear people talk so openly about how living outside your home country is both wonderful and terrifying. They’re wonderfully candid about the fact that even if you love a place dearly, no where is perfect, and you WILL hate somethings about your new home even if the majority of the experience is fantastic. I cannot rate this show highly enough.

Joined the fandom: June 5th 2020, loved it from the first episode. Obsession peaked: July maybe? I was RELIGIOUS about watching the episodes as soon as they came out. Still watch every week, but less “on time.” Fandom friends: None :( but I have tricked my partner in to listening several times :) Obsession faded: It’s dimmed from where it was, but still going strong. Fanfics you NEED to read: NONE. NEVER PLAN TO. Hard and fast rule, I don’t read fics about real people. Characters played by real people, even that’s a maybe for me. But real-real people? FUCK NO. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Any time Garnt and Connor get into a big-brain-monkey-brain argument and Joey is just LOSING his GODDAMN MIND in the corner.

Bringing a retired Japanese porn star in the show for an honest conversation about consensual sex work and showing people can have more than one career in life.

Everything about the, ‘Are Online Friends Real Friends?’ episode. GO WATCH IT, it’s brilliant.

Garnt making “chotto-THE-FUCKING-matte” an expression

August 2020 Great Pretender (TV Series)

Spent most of the summer marinating in my BSD and YOI bubbles, until THIS BAD BOI came up on my Netflix recommendations. HOOOO BOI. This is some Anime Of The Year shit right here. Has a pretty original concept (Catch Me If You Can by way of Oceans 11-ish) but generally starts out like most other shounen (sans the super powers). AND THEN EPISODE FIVE HAPPENS. Not gonna spoil it but they TOOK THAT SHIT UP A NOTCH. Brilliant, even with a bit of an insane ending. GO WATCH THIS ONE.

Joined the fandom: August 2020 Obsession peaked: Pretty much as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: What’s up Fiji ;) @lil-1nsane Obsession faded: Naturally faded, but so glad I watched Fanfics you NEED to read: None so far! Little scared about this one, heard mixed reviews, but maybe someday. Favourite moments:

Edamame’s “madness arc” at the end of season 2. HOOOO BOY.

Laurent getting fucking WRECKED when Edamame punches him mid way through season 2, kills me every time.

Introducing my partner to anime with this show.

October 2020 Attack on Titan (TV Series)

RETURN OF THE KING. lol

In my quest to find an anime that I can watch with my partner, I turned on season 1 of this bad boi. Holy hell I forgot how much I loved this show, NO WONDER everyone lost their goddamn minds when this show first aired. I NEED to catch up before all the season four spoilers come to get me...

Joined the fandom: Winter 2016 Obsession peaked: Basically as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: None yet, but I know you’re out there... Obsession faded: 2017, JUST BEFORE SEASON TWO... I should have stuck around longer I know, but it’s slowly coming back. Reeeeeally need to catch up on seasons two, three, and four. Fanfics you NEED to read: GIVE ME YOUR RECS HEATHENS. Favourite moments:

Watching my partner FREAK OUT about Eren’s “death.”

EVERYTHING ABOUT POTATO GORL! lol

Getting in a conversation with a die hard fan after I hadn’t watched it in three years and saying... “Who’s that blond bitch that cries all the time?”/ “Armin?”/ “THAT’S THE ONE!”

November 2020... kind of. Figure Skating (Sport)

Okay this one is a bit hard to explain. 

I have been a DIE HARD figure skating for A LOOOOOONG time. My grandmother got me a hat from the 2002 Olympics in Salt Lake City and I remember watching even then. But I first became consciously aware of different skaters, my faves, etc. from about 2010. I vividly remember watching Plushenko skating in 2014 while on a school trip to Hawaii, and my friends laughing at me as I yelled at the TV.

But I didn’t TRULY get involved in the fandom side of it until this year. I had all this knowledge bottled up, but didn’t have any skating friends to talk to... UNTIL NOW. Super ironic that this happened in a year with almost NO skating, but I’ll take what I can get ;) Also did I stay up until FOUR-GODDAMN-THIRTY IN THE MORNING a few nights ago to stream Japanese Nationals on my phone??? YOU BET I DID.

Joined the fandom: Three times; 2002, 2010, and 2020. Obsession peaked: 2014? 2018? Idk it peaks any time someone does something amazing. Fandom friends: Rachel, my girl @idancewiththefairies​, WHY DIDN’T I INTRODUCE YOU TO THIS SOONER??? Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Won’t. lol Fanfics you NEED to read: NOPE. NONE. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. No fanfics about real people. Never gonna change that. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir doing THAT routine at the 2018 Olympics.

Rachel​ sheepishly admitting to me that Shoma may have replaced Yuzu as her favourite, and me being SO DAMN PROUD of her for growing and developing her own skating opinions apart from me.

Yuzu’s 2012 ‘Romeo and Juliet’ routine and Worlds. THE RAW FUCKING POWER OF THAT SKATE.

Plushenko, cheeky bastard, changing his 2014 Team Event routine AS IT WAS HAPPENING.

The worlds friendliest rivalry between Yuzu and Nathan.

Any thing the Shibutani’s do, and all they do to break up the stereotype that all of Ice Dancing has to be rOmAnTiC and SeNsUaL to be good.

Watching my early faves become coaches and the D R A M A.

Honorable Mentions:

Coco (Film): I watched this the weekend I came home and I owe this movie a lot. It is so sweet an heartwarming, and it a roundabout way it brought me back to Tumblr (needed somewhere to vent my feelings considering I watched the movie a solid THREE YEARS after it came out, Tumblr seemed like the place to go lol). Watched in again in 2020 and it’s just as amazing.

Jekyll and Hyde (All media): Loved this book from the first time I read it in my first year of uni. But in December 2019, my fandom understanding reached its PEAK. The musical?? The comic?? YOOOOOO.

Dear Evan Hansen (Musical): I have BARELY engaged in fandom discourse, but the MUSIC. She fucking SLAPS.

Sirius the Jaeger (TV Series): This show is such an underrated gem. It literally has so much; "dead” family drama? Eclectic international group of monster hunters? Cowboys and vampires?? Yes, yes, and YES. And the main character has the same Japanese voice actor as Atsushi from BSD!

Studio Ghilbi (Films): My love affair with Ghibli goes back to when I was about 5 and BEGGED my mom to take me to the library so we could rent Kiki’s Delivery Service on DVD. But that love has been FULLY rejuvenated this year when I went to the Ghibli Film Festival in New York City (ironically in the last week in February). If you haven’t seen them, go watch From Up On Poppy Hill, Whisper of the Heart, and The Wind Rises. Spoilers, you’re probably gonna cry.

If you’ve made it this far, THANK YOU FOR READING! 

And thank you to all the amazing people that made my 2020 not so horrible. Good riddance 2020, don’t let the door hit you on the way out!

[baku-no-alt]

sriracha sauce | 3

bakugou x reader; in which Bakugou and some other students from UA are doing a work -study abroad in NYC. also Bakugou is nice to you for once

cw: like, so many swears; sexual references

You’re sitting in a circle with Bakugou and all of his friends - whose real names you’ve learned by now. Kirishima passes out drinks to everyone, and you gladly take a bottle of beer. 

It’s a comfortable house party. No loud music, no insane partying. Just a group of friends sat in a circle, with maybe a few playing beer pong in another room. You smile and laugh at their jokes and stories, and part of you is jealous of Bakugou for having such an interesting group of friends. He barely joins in on the conversation, but you can tell the others enjoy having him around, even if it’s just to mess with him sometimes.

You drink your beer slowly, wary of the fact that you shouldn’t have alcohol during such an emotional time. It takes the edge off a little bit, but that’s all you wanted. You picked something relatively light - a Heineken - to play it safe. 

Midoriya picks at your brain for a little bit; asking about your Quirk and how exactly it works. You humor him, partly because he’s very sweet and genuine, and partly because you can feel the annoyance radiating off of Bakugou in the background while you talk to him.

“Something wrong, Kacchan?” you tease him, and Bakugou sucks his teeth and turns away from you. Smiling, you return to your conversation with Midoriya. 

After you’re done explaining your Quirk (along with nearly your entire life story), Mina catches your attention. 

“We’re having a quick hang out in my room!” she calls, “Girls only!” 

You grin and wave goodbye to Midoriya, following her into a bedroom down the hallway. Mina grabs your hand and drags you the rest of the way, and you look back to steal a glance at Bakugou as you laugh. 

He’s staring right at you, and your heart jumps into your throat. 

Mina pulls you into her room and shuts the door behind both of you. The rest of the girls - Yaoyorozu, Uraraka, Jirou, and Tsu are already there. It’s immediately obvious that the room belongs to Mina. Everything is pink and girly and gaudy and yet, somehow, she makes it all work. A few of the girls sit on the bed, while Tsu sits on the floor with her back resting against the bed frame. Mina grabs her desk chair and a fuzzy pink pouf from her vanity and instructs you to sit down. You choose the desk chair and she sits on the pouf, tucking her legs under her butt. 

“So,” Mina says, practically buzzing with excitement, “what’s the deal between you and Bakugou?” 

“Me and Bakugou? We’re just roommates,” you reply. 

“Bullshit,” Jirou chimes in, “Bakugou never shows up to these things, much less with a friend. Who’s a girl.” 

“It’s not like that!” you protest, your hands coming up in front of you, “I think he just feels sorry for me. I, uh... broke up with my boyfriend a few hours ago.” 

“That’s awful!” Uraraka gasps.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Mina asks. 

“Mina!” Jirou hisses in response, “Don’t be so invasive.” 

“No, it’s okay,” you say, “I... think I do want to talk about it. A little. If that’s okay.”

“Hold on, I’m getting you another drink,” Mina says, and while she’s rummaging in the kitchen, you and the other girls get comfortable with pillows and blankets. Mina returns with a few more beers and bags of chips and pretzels in hand. 

“Okay,” she says, arranging them on the floor in front of everybody for easy access, “let it all out, girl.” 

“Well, spoiler alert, we broke up because he cheated on me,” you begin, shoving some pretzels into your mouth. 

“Oh, so like, good riddance then,” Jirou says. 

“It must still be hard though,” Tsu adds. 

You crack open your beer and continue, “Yeah it sucks, but I guess I should have seen it coming after I found Tinder installed on his phone a few weeks ago.” 

“What?” Yaoyorozu gasps. 

“Oh yeah,” you smile sarcastically, “This man downloaded Tinder on his phone and when I found it, he told me he was using it to check if one of his friend’s girlfriend had a Tinder.” 

“And you believed him?” Jirou quirks a brow. 

“Now that I’m thinking back on it... no? But I took the excuse because I didn’t wanna deal with a breakup. And I didn’t wanna seem like a crazy girlfriend. I wanted to be the cool girl, I guess.” 

“That makes sense,” Uraraka says reassuringly. 

“Anyways...” you glance at the other girls, “...do you guys wanna know how I caught him?” 

“Oh my god yes” Mina practically begs.

You laugh. “She told me. The other girl he was fucking, I mean. She had no idea he had a girlfriend.”

“Oh, shit,” Jirou breathes. 

“Yeah... she texted me screenshots of their conversations on Tinder. When I confronted him, he actually had the nerve to tell me she was lying. That she made it all up.” 

The room is silent for a moment. 

“But I didn’t believe him this time,” you continue, staring into space, “I told him he was full of shit.” 

You let out a long sigh. “He told her that his feelings for her were the realest he ever had. That she was the most amazing woman he’d ever met. Like I was nothing.” Like you didn’t even exist.  

“Well, guess what?” Mina says, taking your hand and squeezing it. 

You meet her gaze. 

“He’s nothing now,” she says while nodding her head.

“Yeah!” Uraraka says, “Good riddance!”

You feel 1000 pounds lighter, and butterflies erupt in your stomach at the thought of new, genuine friendships forming. 

“Thanks for listening,” you say sheepishly, slightly embarrassed that you opened up so much to a group of girls you barely knew.

“Anytime,” Yaoyorozu replies, smiling.

A sudden knock on the door distracts you, and you reach behind you to open it. You find Kirishima standing there, controllers in hand. 

“Bakugou says you’re good at Smash,” he says, looking at you. 

“I bet he does,” Mina whispers to Jirou behind you, and you step backwards with one foot, aiming to crush her toes. 

“I’ve been known to kick some ass every now and then,” you tell Kirishima. 

“Yeah, unless you’re playing against me!” Bakugou calls from the living room. 

You get up and push past Kirishima into the hallway. You can see Bakugou at the end of the hall, a devilish smirk on his face. 

“Eat my shit,” you taunt him, “I bet I could beat you in my sleep.” 

“Prove it,” Bakugou sneers at you.

“Fine,” you say confidently, “But when you lose, you have to buy me dinner.” 

“No,” he replies, moving closer to you, “when you lose, you have to eat an entire bowl of my spicy ramen.” He punctuates each you with a finger jabbing your chest. 

“Deal,” you smirk and hold your hand out towards Kirishima, who hands you a Joy-Con while glancing back and forth between you and Bakugou. 

“Prepare to eat your words, princess.” 

---

masterlist 

@shareyourfandomfaves, @awkward-tamaki, @ha-tep, @reyna-avila-ramirez-alreanaldo, @ayeputita, @lookslikeleese, @alinakaisato

[karajaynetoday]

everybody's got their demons, even wide awake or dreaming | part two

Photo credit: Jess Gleeson

Hello friends! Hope you’re having a lovely day. It’s time for part two of this series! Lizzie takes her opportunity to interview Calum one-on-one in this part. If you need to catch up on Part One, you can do that here. Onwards! 

(This is a fem!OC story)

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: none? i don’t think? 

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

The day or so leading up to Lizzie’s one on one interview with Calum was a blur, as Lizzie tried to fix her body clock and orientate herself with how to get around LA. Her boss had offered her the opportunity to hire a rental car, but the idea of driving on the wrong side of the road was too much for Lizzie to stomach, so Ubers were the go. 

Her body sometimes overslept, sometimes woke her up at 4am, so Lizzie had downloaded a yoga and meditation app to try and sort herself out. She might’ve almost given herself a concussion after toppling over while trying to do a particularly tricky pose, but no one needed to hear about that. The bruises on her elbow were embarrassing enough. 

Danielle had sent Lizzie a text the morning of her lunchtime interview with Calum, confirming the time and place as they’d discussed. Lizzie had handwritten some notes for her questions, trying to contemplate what she could ask Calum that would differ to the others. Or maybe she should ask them all the same questions, and then in the piece she could compare and contrast responses? It was so hard to know what would make the best piece, especially with interviewing Calum in particular. Lizzie knew from watching other interviews, and in her group interview with all of the band the other day (and from back in their school days) that Calum was a man of few words. When he did speak, it was usually with purpose and thought, and made for some great content, but he wasn’t always particularly forthcoming. Which is why it had surprised Lizzie that Calum had volunteered for the first solo interview, but given Michael’s behaviour, she was glad to be continuing with the profile piece at all. 

It was a really warm day, so Lizzie had to forego her usual blazer and jeans in favour of a long green dress with blue and white flowers on it. Her hands were sweaty as the Uber pulled up to the café Calum had suggested, and something in the back of Lizzie’s mind suggested it wasn’t just from the weather. She’d always been an anxious person, but she’d gotten a handle on it recently; this whole LA debacle had brought it back with a vengeance. 

Calum was waiting for her just in front of the café, dark wayfarer sunglasses covering his eyes and his phone in his hand as he leant up against the brick wall beside the café door. He was wearing a grey hoodie and jeans, and nobody coming in or out of the café seemed to pay him any attention; but then again maybe people of Calum’s level of fame were just part of the furniture around here. It was near to Hollywood, after all.

“Hey, thanks for agreeing to meet me.” Lizzie’s voice wasn’t overly loud, but it still made Calum jump as he looked up from his phone at her.

“Of course, of course. I know I sound like a broken record, but we really are excited for you to do this piece. The new album era is something I’ve been looking forward to for a while, and - “ Calum began, smiling warmly at Lizzie, who cut him off by pulling open the café door.

“Before you start getting all meaningful and quotable on me, shall we get a coffee and take a seat?” 

“A woman after my own heart. Let’s do it. Pro-tip, the brownies here are to die for.”

The café was bustling, but most of the patrons seemed to be lining up for takeaway orders. Calum stepped ahead of Lizzie and slipped into a booth towards the back, near a frosted window, greeting the wait staff by name as he went. Lizzie scurried after him, apologising as she accidentally bumped into a tall man with her shoulder bag in her haste and he glared at her. Guess not everyone was as friendly as Calum, then. She slid into the booth opposite Calum, pulling out her notebook and phone as she went. 

“Is it okay if I record this? I’m not very good at taking notes.” 

“Straight into it, LL? At least let a man have his coffee first.” Calum deadpanned, and Lizzie felt her face fall before she realised he was joking with her.

“Of course, sorry. Let’s order. The brownies, you said? How big are they?” Lizzie pasted a smile onto her face, grabbing for the menu on the table in front of her.

“I have it on good authority that they’re perfectly Lizzie-sized. Calum-sized, too - a real multipurpose snack.” Calum was teasing her now, but also being completely serious, as he got the attention of a waitperson who came over to welcome them and take their orders. A skinny latté for Lizzie, an iced coffee for Calum, and a warmed up chocolate brownie with a side of coconut yogurt for them each. They fell into easy conversation, about the weather, and Calum’s neighbourhood, and the other pieces Lizzie had written, almost forgetting why they were there in the first place. When their order of coffees and brownies arrived, Lizzie suddenly snapped out of her feeling of ease when she had to push her notebook and phone over on the table and remember that she was supposed to be interviewing Calum Hood, 5SOS bassist, not catching up with Calum Hood, her Year 9 science lab partner. 

“Now that you’ve got your coffee, can I start recording?” Lizzie asked timidly, as she took a bite out of her brownie and audibly groaned at how heavenly it tasted.

“Depends. Will your brownie orgasm be mentioned in the article?” Could Calum say anything that wasn’t teasing her? Damn it.

“Maybe. Perhaps I’ll do a twitter thread of my trip food highlights, given that the profile piece will be under embargo until the album comes out.” Lizzie deadpanned right back, earning a smile and a small chuckle from Calum.

Lizzie hit record on her phone’s voicenote app, sliding the phone into the centre of the table. She flipped open her notebook to the page marked “Calum”, and she could see Calum trying to read her writing upside down.

“No spoilers, mate. I’ve got a strategy here.” Lizzie mused, angling her notebook so it was harder for Calum to see as he raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Well then, Ms Lawson from Junkee Australia, do your worst.” He flashed her a grin, before taking a sip of his coffee followed by a bite of his brownie (sans any groaning… that must only be a first-time brownie thing).

“So, in our chat yesterday, it was mentioned that this next album is, in some ways, a letter to your homeland, and a reflection on your journeys so far as individual artists as well as being 5SOS collectively. For you, as Calum Hood, what’s the main contribution or perspective that you feel you’ve brought to this album, and the band?” Lizzie saw a flicker of something in Calum’s eyes as she shifted into journalist mode easily, but he only paused for another sip of coffee before answering.

“I think at this point, my main contribution is balancing the collective contributions in the room. I have a lot to say, and I do a lot of songwriting, but I also think the others would agree that I’m also quite observant, so I can read a lot into things they’re saying, or not saying, and bring it out of them into the music. We’ve known each other for almost half our lives at this point, so we know each other better than anyone else, but when we work with other co writers and things like that it can be hard to feel entirely comfortable with the vulnerability you need to bring into writing a song or telling a particular story that day. I’ve got the rep as the strong, silent, shy type, I know - “ Calum paused and returned the soft smile Lizzie was giving him, as she nodded encouragingly. 

“But in interviews, when I’m being asked to explain myself and validate my artistic choices, I’m immediately more defensive and protective of it, because there’s something magical about the writing room, and the vulnerability that can only exist in that context when we’re songwriting, and creating that art. The end product, which is the song or the album or whatever, conveys the emotions in a way that I could never say them with words, and the beautiful thing is that so many people can listen to it and relate to it in ways that I’d never considered before. But that’s the power of it, you know? We make these songs to express ourselves, and fulfil our creative outlets, but it extends beyond that, and that’s the part that gets me.” Calum finished speaking and reached for another sip of his coffee.

“Right. The magic exists in the studio, and on the stage, and in individual people’s lives when they listen to the music wherever they are in the world, and it’s the connecting thread that brings you together with your fans, a moment that you can share even if you never meet.”

“Exactly, it’s the universal experience, and everyone has their own interpretation of what it means to them. Pisses me off when people try and dig to find out who we wrote a certain song about, or whatever. Sometimes it is a specific person or a moment, other times I make shit up to suit the vibe of a chord progression or a concept someone’s brought to the table. It’s a juicier headline if we name and shame, but it’s not fair to the person I’m writing about, especially if they don’t have a similar outlet for a right of reply, and it’s also irrelevant, because my meaning behind a song could be completely different to yours, but that doesn’t make it less valid.” Calum shrugs as he speaks, his tone calm and nonchalant. 

“Makes sense. The music can exist as art, and be open to interpretation, like everything in life. And with this album, and reflecting on your homeland… what does that mean, for you? Because 5SOS have lived almost their entire adult lives overseas, so I know it must be hard to self-determine a cultural identity that’s so strongly linked to somewhere you haven’t lived for so long.” Lizzie asks, munching down another bite of brownie.

Calum cocks his head to the side and rolls his bottom lip into his mouth, and Lizzie feels a lump rise in her throat. Had she phrased the question wrong? Was he mad? Had she struck a nerve? Fuck. 

“Sorry, we don’t have to - I mean, we can keep discussing the album in a different way if you’d prefer -” Lizzie started babbling, and she froze when Calum reached across the table and rested on hers reassuringly. 

“Breathe, Lawson. I just need a minute to think about a deep and meaningful response to your question. You’re fine.” Calum was speaking softly, and there was an apology of sorts in his eyes when Lizzie glanced over at him. She was about to ask him something else, when a waitress came over to check on how everything was going with their orders and offered a second round of coffees and Calum withdrew his hand from the table as he ordered another iced coffee to go, times two. 

“If you could have it ready to go in about an hour, that’d be great.” Calum flashed the waitress a smile, and she shot him a wink as she headed back to the counter to update his order.

“A whole ‘nother hour? You spoil me, Mr Hood.” Lizzie joked, downing the last of her coffee and desperately hoping to avoid any awkwardness in her remaining interview time with Calum. 

“Anything for a fellow Australian, mate. To answer your question, it’s strange, because yes I’ve never lived there full time as an adult, but there’s something about your home country and your hometown that stays with you, no matter where you go or how long you’re gone. Obviously, for me, my sister lives overseas, and neither of my parents were raised in Australia, but it still means a lot to me, because it’s home, you know? The industry there is… interesting, but I still think that if we didn’t have the background we all have as individuals and the band, there’s certainly a lot of decisions we’ve made and ways we’ve gone about things in our careers that are heavily influenced by our upbringings and the mindsets we all have from that experience.” 

“Home is where the heart is, right?” Lizzie offers, thumbing her notebook absently. 

“It’s true. But it’s also refreshing to go back and escape it all a bit, you know? None of my friends at home really give a shit about Calum from 5SOS. They just like hanging out with Cal, which is nice.” Calum shrugs, clasping his hands together on the table in front of him.

“Just Cal? Not cool guy Cal? C Dizzle Swizzle?” Lizzie bit back a grin, remembering the multitude of nicknames Cal had garnered over the years.

“Look, cool guy Cal is just my constant state of being. C Dizzle might make an appearance if I’ve had one too many, but either way, they’re just happy to see me. Or happy to tell me some home truths that I haven’t heard, or wanted to hear, so that’s important too. You can’t live in LA for as long as we have without having a good support crew to keep us grounded, you know? Even if some of the ones who mean the most to us are on the other side of the planet.” There was something in Calum’s eyes again as Lizzie looked at him, and she could tell it was more than what he was trying to say for the sake of the profile interview. 

She swallowed down one final bite of the heavenly brownie, and turned the page to find her next question. Lizzie couldn’t entertain the idea of asking Calum why Michael was mad at her, because it would break the air of professionalism she was desperate to maintain; also, she wasn’t entirely sure he’d even tell her. Calum and Michael had been inseparable in their school days, and Lizzie knew that their bond and sense of loyalty no doubt ran even deeper now than then, given all of their shared experiences, trials and tribulations to date. But Calum had always been so kind and patient with her, whether she’d accidentally ruined their Year 9 science experiment, or she’d nearly thrown up on his shoes at the Year 11 formal after party, or when Michael had stormed out of the studio a few days ago and he offered her his time for the first solo interview. Lizzie brushed off the train of thought, and continued with her interview questions for Calum.

The conversation flowed easily, and Lizzie could already feel the profile starting to come together in her mind. She jotted down a handful of notes on how to adapt her questions for Luke and Ashton based on Calum’s responses, and before they realised how long they’d been chatting, the waitress returned with Calum’s two takeaway iced coffees. 

Lizzie asked the waitress for the bill, but Calum waved her off. 

“I’ve got it, Lizzie. Don’t stress.” 

“But I can expense it! I have a receipts app, and everything!” Calum laughed at how excited Lizzie seemed at the concept of submitting a work expense claim.

“Okay, fine. You win this round.” 

Lizzie pressed stop on her phone recording, and reached for her bag to slide her notebook in. The waitress returned with the bill, and Lizzie handed her travel bank card over, drumming her hands absentmindedly on the table while she waited for the waitress to come back with her card and the receipt. 

“Lizzie?” Her head snapped up as Calum spoke. 

“He’s not… I know it seems like he’s really mad at you, but he’s not.” It took a moment for Lizzie to register what Calum was saying.

“He’s not mad at me? He refused to speak to me and stormed out of the room the first chance he got, but he’s not mad? Right.” Lizzie couldn’t help but sound bitter as she spoke.

“I can’t speak for him, but I know him. He’s not mad, he’s just hurt about everything.” Lizzie could tell Calum was being very careful with his choice of words, and she eyed him curiously across the table.

“What does he possibly have to be hurt about? He’s the one that -” Lizzie catches herself halfway through her sentence, and squeezes her eyes shut as she inhales deeply.

“Here’s your receipt and your card back, miss. Thanks so much for visiting us today, have a lovely day!” Lizzie blinks and squints up at the waitress, who hands back her card and a paper receipt. Lizzie mumbles her thanks, and goes to stand up and slide out of the booth, and Calum follows her out of the café.

“Lizzie, I didn’t mean to upset you -” Calum’s apologetic tone had Lizzie spinning on her heel to face him once they’re through the doors of the café. 

“You didn’t, Calum. It’s fine. I’m here to do a job, and I appreciate your time today, I really do. Michael and I… I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it, okay? I know it won’t be easy, but for now, I just want to focus on getting the best interview content I can from you all. That’s why I’m here.” Lizzie wrings her hands nervously, and she can feel how sweaty her palms are.

“Is that the only reason you’re here?” Calum’s tone isn’t teasing, or harsh. It’s genuine, curious, soft. He’s not moving as he stands in front of Lizzie and gazes down at her from his full height. 

Before Lizzie can answer, Calum’s phone starts to ring, and he casts her another glance before stepping away to answer it. While he’s chatting to whoever’s on the other end of the line, Lizzie decides to order herself an Uber and make her way back to the hotel so she can make a start on transcribing the interview with Calum. Because that was why she was here, Lizzie told herself in her head, stubbornly. Didn’t matter about the feelings in her stomach, and the tightness of her chest. She was there to write a profile about a band, nothing more, nothing less. 

“I’ve got to go and meet Ash at the studio, are you all good from here?” Calum’s question broke Lizzie out of her internal dialogue. 

“Yep, all good. Thanks again for your time, Cal. I really appreciate it. I think it’s going to be a great piece, and I’m intrigued to see what comes out of the other interviews. All of them.” Lizzie’s pointed tone isn’t lost on Calum, and he grimaces slightly at the fire he seems to have ignited. Ah well. Lizzie and Michael had to sort their shit out sooner or later, right?

Right? 

Calum was trying to convince himself as he strolled down the street towards his car, pondering if he’d made things better or worse between Michael, his best mate through almost his entire life, and Lizzie, the girl that he’d been sure Michael would love forever, but had walked away from in a shadow of hurt, betrayal, and disbelief. The girl that apparently had no idea Michael felt that way, or that if he did, it wasn’t justified. Someone’s side of the story just wasn’t adding up, but Calum wasn’t sure whose it was. Not anymore.

Taglist: If there’s a line through your name, I couldn’t tag you, so please message me to let me know your new URL or what the go is!  @suchalonelysunflower @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @loveroflrh @spicycal @notinthesameguey @metalandboybands @cheekysos @ashton-trash  @another-lonely-heart @queenalienscherrypie  @becihadshawn  @allthestarsandthemoon​ @wheniminouterspace​

[epochofbelief]

Breath Control, Chapter Seven

An A Court of Mist and Fury College Swim Team AU

All characters belong to SJ Maas!

Feysand.... and welcome to Elriel. 

Warnings: cursing

Let me know if you want to be tagged! 

Authors Note: This chapter is a BIG gateway chapter to a lot of things. . . also VERY lightly edited... and enjoy the new POV shift... ;)

Masterlist Link!

SEVEN

~~~Elain~~~

It was around 9 am. I’d been in the kitchen for an hour already, trying to decide what to make for breakfast. I’d started making pancakes, then switched to waffles, then omelets.  I’d be set on my decision for as long as it would take me to pull out all the ingredients for my choice, then I’d change my mind, put everything back, and pull a bunch of different things out. 

My father walked in at around 9:30, as I was pulling the muffins I’d made from scratch out of the oven. I’d decided muffins were neutral enough that everyone in the house would like them and that I could make them well enough to everyone’s satisfaction. Nesta said I worked too hard to please people. 

No clue where she got that idea. . . 

“Is no one else up?” my father said.

I shook my head. “Just me and the muffins.”

He took one, buttered it, and made to sit down. He seemed to think better of it, though, because he set his muffin down and stood up straight. “I’d better go wake Feyre. I want to ask her about all those paint cans and supplies she’s left in the garage, and someone has to be here to eat these muffins. Best to do it know while Mr. Night sleeps; I know how sensitive that girl can be about her painting.”

I nodded, standing alone at the counter before I remembered.

“Dad, Dad, Dad! Let me wake up Feyre. I--um--”

He was halfway up the stairs when I caught up to him, pausing to look down at me. I went with the oldest trick in the book. “Girl stuff.” I widened my eyes meaningfully. “Best if I check up on her first.”

I prayed my father didn’t see through my very feeble attempt to make him uncomfortable. But it worked. He clicked his tongue and descended the staircase. “I’ll take your word for it, Elain. Hurry down. And tell Feyre to hurry too…”

It was like he knew. Oh Feyre was so going to owe me. 

I bounded up the stairs, not slowing until I was at the top of Feyre’s own narrow staircase. I knocked and entered, ready to get a kick out of what was about to happen.

“Oh, Feyreeee, Dad needs you downstairs.”

Nothing for a few moments. I thought I heard whispers but from where I stood, I  couldn’t see anything besides the large lump of her white bed coverings. “I guess I could send Dad up here…”

The whispering became clearer, now, and I made out something like, “Shut up!” and “I’ll handle it” and “Calm the fuck down.” 

Feyre suddenly appeared in a very large t-shirt and nothing else. “Thanks, ‘Lain.” She practically hissed my name. She stalked across the floor toward me. “How’d you know?” She murmured.

“Got up for a glass of water last night. Saw Rhysand’s ass as it cleared the top of the staircase. Figured I’d save you from Dad’s wrath.”

Feyre rolled her eyes. “We didn’t do anything. And Dad has no right to dictate what I can and can’t do.”

“Obviously not,” I agreed. “But he could make things very awkward.”

“True. We’ll--I’ll--be down in a second. Please don’t tell Nesta. She’d be unbearable.”

“Tell me what?” A voice like iron floated across the small landing. 

Feyre shut her eyes and I cringed. Nesta’s judgment might be worse than our father’s.

“Hey, Nesta,” Feyre said guiltily. 

“Feyre. Hi Rhys!” Nesta raised her voice imperceptibly. 

A tan hand rose from the bed. “Why the fuck do you have so many sisters, Archeron?”

The light that shone behind Feyre’s eyes was like nothing I’d ever seen before. In either of my sisters’ faces. Or my own. I bit back my own grin. After Tamlin, and the shitty year Feyre had had, I just wanted her to be happy. And Rhys was so good-natured. Didn’t hurt that he was hot, too. She deserved to look all happy despite being caught out by her two older sisters.

“I’d get downstairs quick. And arrive separately.” Nesta was fighting back a laugh. “I can’t wait to hear Dad chew you out for your sex life. For once, it won’t be me.” She smiled wickedly.

“We didn’t--I didn’t--get out!” Feyre screeched at us. 

“You’re welcome,” Nesta and I said in unison, and we grinned at each other. Feyre pushed us out with surprising strength and slammed the door.  

“That was fun.” Nesta started down the staircase first. 

I was about to respond when my phone vibrated in my back pocket. I pulled it out.

Azriel: Mooorning

“Who’s that?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t play dumb.” Nesta dropped her voice to a low whisper as we descended the main staircase and headed for the kitchen. “You’re grinning like an idiot, and not in the ‘I just caught my sister with a boy in her bed in my dad’s house’ way you were earlier.” 

“Uh, just looking at a meme.” Weak.

“Because you spend so much time scrolling through memes.”

Thankfully, Nesta let the subject drop. I honestly wished she hadn’t. Everyone had been treating me like a fragile piece of glass since the whole Greyson debacle. And while, yes, I wasn’t quite ready to share that I’d been secretly talking to Azriel for the past two months… I was strong enough to handle some sisterly teasing, or even fatherly teasing. Or any kind of teasing.

Instead, everything was, “Oh, Elain, your cookies taste so good!” and, “Oh, Elain, the garden looks wonderful!” and, “Oh, Elain, how’s nursing school?” Nobody wanted to talk about anything real with me, because they thought I wasn’t ready. And if I was the one to start down that road, they’d continue to tread on ice around me and just be grateful I was talking at all. Too grateful to really listen to what I had to say.

Which was why I’d downloaded a dating app two months ago, swiped right on all of two guys before I’d found someone worthy of deleting the app immediately after we started messaging. It’d been a constant stream of texting and snapchatting ever since, even if we hadn’t met up in person yet. My romantic past, Azriel’s loner tendencies, and the fact that he was one of Rhys’s best friends and Feyre’s teammate had made us decide to take things slow. But seeing how happy Feyre was with Rhys--and she didn’t even know it quite yet--made me think that I should tell my sister and then get Azriel to take me out. 

That would certainly surprise everybody. Elain made of glass, indeed.

Before I could lose my nerve, I texted Azriel back. Sliding my phone back into my pocket, I reentered the kitchen with a smile on my face, trying not to ponder on the message I’d just sent.

Elain: I’ve been thinking. . . We should meet up… Face to face. 

Elain: Like on a date. 

I got a response within a moment and didn’t need to check my phone to know what it said.

Azriel: Hell yes. 

~~~FEYRE~~~

I slammed the door shut. I looked behind me to find Rhys, breathtakingly shirtless, propped up on one elbow behind me. 

“What are the chances that both of your lovely sisters keep their mouths shut about this? Cuz I have a feeling even a mutual love for collegiate athletics won’t stop your father from kicking me out of the house for staying the night in your room.”

I slumped onto the bed and he was suddenly there, filling all the empty space in the room as he hovered over me. I closed my eyes, fighting back a smile. “They’ve had their fun. Sisters don’t snitch.”

He rested his forehead against my shoulder. “Great. Not that I care about you, of course. I’m just very concerned about where I’ll have Thanksgiving dinner if your dad kicks me out.”

I sat up and pushed him back against the blankets all in one motion. “You take that back,” I said playfully. 

“Make me.”

“How about I go down there and confess to my dad before Nesta or Elain can rat us out? Then I’d be rid of your sorry ass much more quickly.”

“Feyre!” Elain’s voice floated up the stairs tauntingly, interrupting our flirting.

“This isn’t over, Archeron,” Rhys said threateningly. 

I pointed to the door. “Go put on something presentable. Your hair’s a mess.” 

He scowled. But he kissed me lightly on the lips before he left the room and I almost told him to forget about family breakfast and stay up here with me, instead.

------

The day passed in a blur. We spent the majority of it in the kitchen prepping for Thanksgiving lunch tomorrow afternoon. After a while, we all retired to the living room and marathoned the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Rhys sat next to me on the couch and as soon as it got dark enough outside that my father, Nesta, and Elain probably wouldn’t notice, he took my hand under our shared blanket and I set my head on his shoulder. 

I stayed in his room that night, although we were both too tired to do much other than fall into bed after a day spent in the kitchen. I woke before him the next morning and tiptoed downstairs to let him sleep.

I found Elain and Nesta arguing in my kitchen. 

“Why don’t you just tell me who he is,” Nesta was saying in a very low, very dangerous voice.

“Butt out, Nesta. It’s no one.”

“If it was no one, there’d be nothing for me to butt out of, now would there be?”

Elain was gripping the island countertop in the center of the kitchen. Nesta, surprisingly, was cooking up a huge skillet of scrambled eggs. It smelled as though they were starting to burn while her attention was focused on Elain. 

Elain’s phone vibrated. “Who is he?” Nesta shrieked.

“Fuck off!”

“What’s going on?” I asked. 

They both started speaking at once. 

“Elain’s being stupid--”

“Nesta won’t stay out of my own fucking business--”

“Help me convince her--” 

I held up my hands. “Oh, both of you shut up! Elain. Explain.”

Nesta mumbled something under her breath that I chose not to hear as Elain sighed. “Nesta thinks I’m talking to a boy. She thinks that she has a right to know who he is--if he even exists,” Elain added with an eye roll, “and that she deserves the right to approve. I told her to fuck off, but she’s not listening.”

I’d never heard so many “fucks” from Elain in one conversation. There was definitely a boy. 

“Well, why don’t you tell us? After everything…”

Elain pushed herself back from the countertop, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’m not some fragile teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys! Despite what you think about how terribly broken I am after Greyson, I know what I’m doing! And now I don’t want to tell you even more. So leave me alone.” 

She turned and pushed through the door that led from the kitchen to the side yard. 

I looked at Nesta. She looked at me. 

“She better be getting it reallll good to get so upset with us for asking about it,” Nesta said.

I took a seat at the barstools surrounding the island. “Do you think she. . . Do we really treat her like a teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys?”

“Maybe. But that’s because she doesn’t know how to speak to boys--or men, for that matter.”

Nesta thought she knew what was best for Elain--and she usually did. But Nesta also liked getting her way. When her way wasn’t Elain’s way. . . It was difficult for both of them. I resolved that no matter what Nesta thought, I’d try to give Elain some space when it came to her Mystery Guy. Even if I was dying to find out who it was. 

“Speaking of boys. . .” Nesta began, but at that moment, Rhys stepped into the kitchen. Thank God. I didn’t know what exactly was going on between us at the moment. Discussing it with Nesta would be torture. 

“Good morning,” I said brightly as Rhys took a seat beside me. 

“Is it?” He asked. Nesta had turned around to find her eggs burnt to a crisp, ignoring Rhys entirely.

“What’s wrong?”

Rhys leaned his elbows on the counter. “My father called. He’s in town. And wants me to spend the weekend with him in my hometown.”

I couldn’t help the fear that gripped me at his words. Was he just making this up because he wanted to escape me? I struggled to keep my voice steady. “Where’s that?” 

“Two hours north of here.”

“Well I can take you and drop you off tomorrow morning,” I managed to say. “Would that work?”

He blinked. “I did tell you that my father is a horrible person, right?”

“Not sure you mentioned it. . . But it’s Thanksgiving. You should be with family.” Which was true. Although I’d rather he stay here.

He rolled his eyes. “I can’t burden you with driving all the way out there and back just so I can spend the weekend with a very unideal candidate.” He gave me a look that told me who was the ideal candidate. Maybe he wasn’t making this up. . . 

“Um. . . Uber?”  Stay here, stay here, stay here.

“Too expensive.” He glanced at Nesta, and then turned to face me more fully. “You could stay with us. We can just make it ‘meet the parents’ week.” He smiled hopefully.

Relief flooded my body. “Well…” I definitely wanted to go with him. Right now I didn’t want to leave his side at all after the past two nights sleeping in his arms. But I didn’t want to offend my family.

Nesta banged the skillet against the edge of the trash can, causing both Rhys and me to jump about a mile. “Go with him, Feyre. I’ll talk to Dad.”

I couldn’t help the smile that exploded across my face. “I guess you’re stuck with me.” I grinned at him. 

“There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck with.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @sleeping-and-books​ @musicalfae​ @queen-of-glass

[rimmers-swimming-certificate]

Red Dwarf fanfic - Comatose 10/16

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 |  part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9

“Look at this place, Lister,” Rimmer said appreciatively, as he jogged into their quarters in sportswear, and glanced at the hologramatic watch strapped to his wrists as though he was checking his time. He tapped it a few times, then nodded in apparent satisfaction.

Somehow, Lister doubted he had actually run very far. From the top bunk where he had been laying, Lister glanced around the room. Nothing seemed particularly unusual. He frowned. “What?”

“It’s never been tidier,” Rimmer told him. “Holly, a clean uniform please.”

The jogging bottoms and t-shirt disappeared to reveal Rimmer’s usual uniform. He glanced in the mirror to check his appearance, then sat down on the bottom bunk.

“I mean, look at it,” he continued, addressing Lister again. “Your dirty laundry basket is completely empty, your clean clothes put away neatly, not hanging out of the tops of your drawers like they’re trying to escape. The ashtrays are empty and clean, there are no half-empty lager cans laying around the place, no remnants of last night’s dinner. I almost feel like I live with an adult.”

Lister rolled his eyes. “Yeah, well don’t get used to it. It’s only like this because I can’t do any of those things. Soon as I get my body back, I’m sure I’ll be back to driving you crazy in no time.”

From the bunk below him, Rimmer made a sound that Lister couldn’t quite identify, somewhere between a laugh and a sigh.

Lister frowned again. “What?”

“Nothing,” Rimmer told him.

It hadn’t been nothing. Lister rolled over onto his side and peered over the side of the bunk to look at Rimmer. “What?”

Rimmer shook his head. “You won’t appreciate it,” he said.

“Try me.”

Rimmer sighed. He got to his feet, walked a few paces, turned around, and then walked back again. “Fine. You sound like me,” he said. “Like I used to. Obsessed with getting my body back, convinced that it was going to happen…”

“It is going to happen,” Lister told him. “My body’s still alive in the medical unit, yours got turned into radioactive dust three million years ago. Not the same thing.” It had better happen, anyway. The only thing that was keeping him from going crazy was the thought that there would, eventually, be a resolution to the situation, that he could be downloaded back into his waiting body and resume life as normal.

Rimmer nodded. “I hope you’re right,” he said.

I am right,” Lister told him. “The results of the more detailed scan came back, and whatever caused it, it’s not done any more damage at least.”

“Whatever caused it?” asked Rimmer. “So you don’t know, then?”

Lister shook his head. That was the worrying thing, apparently it just sometimes happened, and when it did, sometimes it happened again. “It’s totally normal,” he said, “Nothing to worry about. In fact, Kryten reckons I’m doing better than the medicomp predicted.”

“That’s the way it goes sometimes though, Lister,” Rimmer told him. He paced the room again. “One brief push toward life, like they put all their strength into getting better, and for a moment it works, until it doesn’t. One day the doctor’s telling you things are improving, and you’re convinced Great Uncle Ernest is going to pull through, the next you’re making an appointment at the funeral home and trying to decide what music to play as he disappears behind the big curtain.”

Lister lay back down. “Great, thanks a lot.”

Rimmer nodded. “Just trying to prepare you for the possibility,” he said. “I wouldn’t want you to be disappointed if you wake up dead tomorrow.”

Lister folded his arms. He couldn’t work Rimmer out sometimes. One minute he almost seemed like he was trying to be nice, the next, he came out with something like this. Lister ignored him.

“It’s not all bad though,” Rimmer added. “Like I said, the place has never been tidier.”

One of two things was happening here. Either Rimmer was trying to upset him -- possible but somehow it didn’t feel likely, or Rimmer was genuinely trying to help, but in such a Rimmer way that it felt as though he was trying to upset him.

“And you know, holograms can theoretically continue forever, they don't die. Not to mention being intangible makes you de facto indestructible.”

“Oh yeah?” Lister asked. “So that’s why you’re the first one to go charging headfirst into danger, is it?”

“Of course I don’t endanger myself unnecessarily,” Rimmer told him. “I’m the highest ranking crew member on this ship. You’d be lost without me.”

Lister rolled his eyes. “Yeah, right. Absolutely.”

“But you, Lister. Think about it. No more getting whacked on the head by psychotic droids, no more worrying about what might happen to you when we encounter the next horrible thing. In fact, maybe you should just opt to stay as you are regardless of what happens to your body.”

“I don’t think so,” Lister told him. “Why are you bringing this up, anyway?”

Rimmer shrugged. “No reason. Just making conversation. I thought you might be bored, so I decided to come up with something to occupy your mind.”

“You thought I might want to occupy my mind with the thought of dying and being a hologram for the rest of eternity?”

Rimmer shrugged again. “Everybody dies, Lister. Wouldn’t it be better that it happened now, while you’re prepared for it? And while you’re already in a hologram body; while you’re actually yourself rather than the most recent backup of your personality and memories?”

Lister thought about it. “No,” he said. “Smeg off.”

And you’d get to attend your own funeral,” Rimmer added. That’s always been a dream of mine, you know. Right from being a boy. I always thought that if I died -- or rather if I faked my own death -- I could attend my own funeral in disguise and hear what people said about me. Talk about an ego boost! And I bet Frank would have cried too, the big sissy.”

Lister shook his head. “You’re a very strange guy, Rimmer. You’d really have wanted to put your family through that?”

“Yes. Absolutely.” Rimmer didn’t even hesitate before he responded. He sat down on the bottom bunk and sighed. “I bet I never even had a funeral,” he said. “I mean, circumstances being what they were. It’s not like they had a body to bury, so they probably just shrugged their shoulders and got on with their lives.”

Lister sighed. Laying on his bunk, he stared upward at the space above his head. “I’m sure they didn’t,” he said. “I’m sure they were really broken up.”

“Doubtful,” Rimmer told him. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they had a party. A ‘Hurray! Thank smeg we don’t have to think about that embarrassment Arnold anymore’ party.”

Lister shook his head.

“I bet they had party hats. And those noise-maker things that you blow through. And party poppers too.”

“Rimmer, come on, stop it. What’s the point in torturing yourself like this?”

A pause from the bunk below him, and then, “Well, excuse me. You’ve seemed a bit down the past couple of days, even before the whole seizure thing. I’m sorry for trying to cheer you up.”

“By talking about your funeral?”

“No, by talking about yours… Oh. Yes, I see your point.”

Sometimes Lister wondered how Rimmer had managed to function on a ship surrounded by normal people. And then he remembered, he hadn’t. “I don’t need cheering up, anyway, What I need is something to do.” It was strange, Lister had always thought that he was good at doing nothing. Being lazy was one of his best talents. If he really set his mind to it, he would have no problem laying in bed for a week, as long as he had a steady supply of television and curry. He supposed maybe the fact that he couldn’t eat might be getting in his way.

“Do something, then,” Rimmer suggested.

He would, only he couldn’t think of anything. “Great. Helpful. Any suggestions?”

“Not really,” Rimmer told him. “Why would I have any suggestions?”

Lister sighed. “Doesn’t matter. Forget it.”

“Oh,” said Rimmer. “Because everything you like to do is off limits right now. I see. Well…” He made an exaggerated ‘thinking about it’ face. “The scanner needs recalibrating. The one that didn’t detect the droid when we went over to the ship where you got whacked on the head. You never know when you’re going to need to scan something, and as you’ve proven, it’s better if the results are accurate.”

“What?” Lister got down from his bunk and sat at the table. Where his still unfinished jigsaw taunted him. “You mean you haven’t done it yet? It’s been nearly eight months.”

“It’s been on my list for a while now,” Rimmer told him. “I was going to get to it.”

Lister shook his head. “We’ve been using that,” he said. “Remember last week we passed that moon with the breathable atmosphere and we decided to leave it because it was infested with shapeshifting GELFs? Well what if they weren’t GELFs? What if in reality it was a planet filled with beautiful women just desperate for some company?”

Rimmer shrugged. “Well, I hate to break it to you, Listy, but you’re about as much use to a woman right now as a vibrator with the batteries missing. Less, actually.”

“Oh, great, thanks a lot!”

“Sorry. It’s true though.”

Rimmer wasn’t wrong, actually. Lister sighed slowly through pursed lips and drummed his fingers thoughtfully on one leg. “I could find a nice hologram girl,” he said.

Rimmer shook his head. “Two problems with that, Lister. Firstly, Holly can barely support the two of us. We’ve had to shut down life support to most of the ship just to keep you up and running, so the chances of us being able to support another one are slim to none. Secondly, if we did meet a female hologram, I’ve got dibs.”

“Dibs?” Lister eyed him scornfully. “You can’t call dibs, Rimmer. We’re talking about a person with thoughts and feelings of her own. It’s not up to you who she falls in love with.”

Rimmer shook his head. “And you think that given a choice between the two of us, she’d pick you?”

“Maybe. More likely than her picking you anyway,” Lister told him. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter, does it? She doesn’t exist, we made her up.”

“Yes, well if she’s made up, that means I can imagine her wanting to go out with me, doesn’t it?”

Lister folded his arms defensively. “No, it doesn’t. I made her up.”

“Yes, but you said yourself, you can’t call dibs, therefore you can’t do anything to stop me imagining myself charming her into leaving you, and the two of us living happily ever after. Anyway, if she did end up with you, what would happen to your so-called ‘relationship’ when you moved back into your body? That’d throw an ice cold bucket of water over your passions, wouldn’t it?”

Lister sighed. “What are we doing?” he said. “We’re arguing over nothing. Literally.”

“Well, that might be what you’re doing, Lister, but what I’m doing is giving you something to do. You said you were bored, didn’t you?”

Rimmer gave a smug smile. Lister glared at him. “I can hit you now, you know that, right?”

“Okay, okay,” Rimmer said. He raised his hands in mock surrender. “So you don’t want to recalibrate the sensor, probably for the best; you’d need help from the skutters, and honestly they seem to listen to you even less than me, if that’s possible.”

“Yeah,” said Lister, “what’s with that anyway? I’ve always been tight with the skutters. While you were yelling at them for spending two hours cleaning the cinema while a movie was on, I was covering for them, and they knew it.”

“It’s about respect,” Rimmer told him. “They respect me, they don’t respect you. Besides, they know I’d make good on my threat to eject them out of the nearest airlock if they didn’t do what I asked.”

No he wouldn’t. Rimmer needed the skutters. Lister didn’t bother to point that out; Rimmer was already aware.

“What would you be doing right now if you weren’t a hologram?” Rimmer asked. “If we’d never gone to explore that ship, you hadn’t been whacked over the head by a psychotic simulant and none of this had happened, how would you be wasting your time this afternoon?”

Lister thought about it. Honestly, he didn’t know. If he’d been able to touch it, the jigsaw puzzle would have been finished months earlier, and he wasn’t going to put himself through working on it right now.

He had been trying knitting again. Nothing fancy. Nothing with any shape to it at all, actually. A cobbled together mismatch of different colours and types of wool that he had managed to find around the ship, left behind by various members of the crew. He wasn’t very good at it, but he thought he’d been doing okay. Especially considering all he had to go on was a single, half remembered lesson from his grandmother one rainy Sunday afternoon when he hadn’t been able to play out.

Like the jigsaw though, he hadn’t been doing that because he wanted to do it, he had been doing it because there wasn’t a lot to do three million years into deep space when you were the only human in a vast, lonely universe. It definitely wasn’t something he was interested in trying to teach the skutters to do for him.

“So, nothing?” Rimmer said. He looked at him scornfully. “You can’t think of a single thing you would be doing?”

Lister shrugged. “Can you?”

The look on Rimmer’s face told him that no, he couldn’t. Rimmer got to his feet, walked across the room and back, then looked at Lister, triumphant. “Why don’t you educate yourself?” he said.

Lister scowled. “Hey! I’m educated.”

“Debatable, but that’s not what I meant. Holly had every book ever written on any subject ever. They’re all just stored in the database. Why don’t you crack one open and learn something new?”

Lister raised his hands and wiggled his fingers. “I can’t turn the pages.”

Rimmer rolled his eyes. “It wouldn’t be a physical book, you gimboid. It would be on a computer screen. Instead of pressing a button to turn the page, you just ask Holly to do it for you. It’s easy.”

“Oh.” Lister shook his head. “Well, maybe later. I’m not really in the mood for reading right now.”

He was rarely in the mood for reading, if he was honest. And Rimmer knew it.

“Okay,” said Rimmer. “Okay…” He paced the room a couple more times before he sat back down on the bed. “Forget what you would normally be doing. If you could be doing anything right now, what would it be?”

“Does it matter?” Lister asked. After all, if it was something he couldn’t have, what would be the point in torturing himself by thinking about it?

Rimmer didn’t reply. He simply let the question hang in the air.

Lister sighed. He was tempted to go for the flippant answer. He would be laying in bed in his house on Fiji with Kochanski by his side. The two of them would be basking in post-coital afterglow, staring into each other’s eyes, their legs still entwined under the thin, cotton sheet that covered them, while a gentle breeze floated in through the open window. From the next room, he would be able to hear the sound of Jim and Bexley beginning to wake up.

But realistically, because although he wasn’t willing to give up on that particular dream just yet, he had to concede that it wasn’t exactly plausible for the time being, he supposed there was only one thing he really wanted to be doing.

“Eating a curry,” he said.

“That’s it?” Rimmer sounded disappointed.

“No,” Lister assured him. “That’s not ‘it’. Not just any old curry. We’re talking a really good curry. The kind that’s so hot it burns the skin off the roof of your mouth and blunts your taste buds so much you can’t taste anything else for a week, you know? A vindaloo, or maybe even a phall. Oh, and I’d have poppadoms for a starter, huge ones, just the right amount of crunch, piled high with lime pickle, chutney, and a bit of raita. And I’d wash the whole thing down with an ice cold lager or seven.”

“Holly can simulate food,” Rimmer told him. “After a fashion.”

Lister shook his head. “Rimmer, Holly can’t simulate food that she can’t project into your hand or straight down your gob. Call me crazy, but I don’t much fancy being force-fed an entire chicken vindaloo with all the sides.”

“Well, you can still have the lager.” Rimmer tried.

Lister shook his head. “But I don’t want to.”

“I’m just saying, you could, if you wanted to.”

“Have you tasted those hologramatic drinks, Rimmer? They’re so thin and flavourless they might as well be American beer.” Honestly, it was probably a good thing Holly couldn’t recreate a curry; he was sure it would have been a big disappointment. It would have been like one of the microwave meals you got in the freezer aisle at the supermarket. The kind advertised as ‘healthy’, filled with peas and green beans, and all kinds of other things that didn’t belong in a curry. It would maybe have one or two pieces of meat suspended in the most flavourless curry sauce it had ever been his misfortune to try.

“Fine,” Rimmer told him. “You just carry on moping. You just get back on your bunk and stare at the ceiling and look forward to your body healing so you can get transferred back into it and tuck into that curry. Just remember, some of us don’t have that luxury. Some of us died three million years ago and don’t have a body to move back into. So maybe think about that the next time you want to complain.”

“I wasn’t complaining,” Lister told him. “I didn’t say a word ‘til you came in here and started trying to cheer me up. I mean, I was a bit bored, but I was reasonably happy.”

He hadn’t been. Not really. But then, Rimmer hadn’t known that.

“Fine,” Rimmer told him. “I was just trying help, but I’ll just smeg off then, shall I?” He got to his feet and headed for the door.

Lister sighed. “Rimmer, wait.”

The hologram stopped, but didn’t turn around.

“I’m sorry. You’re right, I was moping. But come on, man. You've got to let me mope. I mean, you did enough of it back when Holly first switched you on...”

“With good reason,” Rimmer interjected.

“Well, yeah. Maybe. Look, it’s scary, okay? My body’s down there hooked up to all those machines, being looked after, and there’s still a chance I’m not going to make it, and I can’t… I don’t want to…” he stopped, giving up. He didn’t want to be a hologram forever, but he couldn’t say that. Not to Rimmer. There was nothing wrong with being a hologram, he firmly believed that; always had. That didn’t mean it was easy. Some people just couldn’t hack it, and he was beginning to suspect that he might be one of them.

Rimmer turned. His expression had softened. “Okay,” he said. “So the lager’s not great. Why not try something else. It’s Saturday night, why don’t we go to the bar and get a hologramatic one of those weird cocktails you used to have sometimes?”

Lister thought about it. “I’m not really in the mood,” he said.

“But, it’s Saturday night. That used to be important to you, as I remember. As I’m physically incapable of forgetting, actually. Thanks to the learning drugs I’d taken, that conversation is still rattling around in the back of my mind.”

“Used to be, yeah,” Lister agreed. “What difference does it make now though? If it’s Saturday, or Friday, or some random Tuesday the first week of January? When’s the last time we bothered about it being the weekend?”

Rimmer shrugged. “Well, okay. So it’s a random night. It happens to be a Saturday, but that’s not relevant. Let’s go for a drink.”

Lister closed his eyes and took a deep breath in and out. The guy was really trying. It didn’t seem fair to give him nothing in return. “Fine,” he said. “Let’s get drunk.”

He got up and walked through the door, leaving Rimmer staring after him. “Er… I never said ‘drunk’ he called. “I said ‘drink’ singular. Lister? Lis… fine. Wait for me.”

(next)

(Thanks to @norwegianpornfaerie for beta-ing)

[lonelypond]

AU YEAH AUGUST: Café Quarantine, Part IV

Love Live, NicoMaki, 4.4K, 4/5

Summary: Nico's feeling better and the quarantine is about to end, but will the Café continue?

Chapter IV

Maki paused in the door of the kitchen. A masked Nico was prepping what looked like lasagna. Maki grinned. Nico had started objecting to takeout, insisting she could make better, healthier food.

“How were the donuts?” Nico asked, aware of Maki even turned away.

“Perfect.”

Nico snorted.

“Hey Nico.” Maki had woken up with an idea.

“Mmmm hmmm.” Nico hummed as she spread another layer of sauce.

“Why don’t you have your Mom bring your siblings over?”

Nico spun, sauce spilling across the counter.

“I mean, you can use the media room. I’ve got controllers enough for everybody to play MarioKart or something. I bet they miss you a lot. You shouldn’t be contagious.”

“You want to be beat at MarioKart by more people?” Nico aimed the spoon at Maki and flicked her wrist.

“Ha! You beat me once.” Then Maki shrugged, “I’d stay out of the way. I might still be asymptomatic.”

“Maki will be fine.” Nico said fiercely, surprising Maki.

“Probably.” Maki agreed, “Anyway, ask your Mom. She doesn’t work on the weekends, right? It’ll give them something to be excited about.” Maki zoomed off, while Nico was still processing the offer.

###

“No!!!” Maki roared at her phone while Hanayo’s not in any way innocent suggestion blinked there. It was time to pick another theme after three days of “Dames.” And Hanayo, probably with Rin giggling in the background had just sent a group text with the word “Kiss.” Sure Maki might have thought it to herself, maybe imagined singing “Prelude to A Kiss” or “Give Me A Kiss To Build A Dream One” but her private conversations in her own head were private, never to be shared or discussed in the same house as Nico.

No, no, no...this had to be stopped before Nico agreed. She typed quickly.

M: I thought Nico’s friend was going to dance. So wouldn’t dance be good? “

M: Or weather, I’ve been wanting to play “A Foggy Day in Londontown.”

N: Dance is good.

H: ಠ╭╮ಠ

Maki got a non group text from Rin.

R: Chicken.

M: This isn’t helping me, Rin.

R: (*≧▽≦)ﾉｼ))

R: (っ˘зʕ•̫͡•ʔ

Maki stormed out of her own bedroom, hoping to avoid Nico, slamming the music room door, and settling down to play. Time to Beethoven the annoyance at nudge-y friends out of her system.

###

The Yaazawas were in the house. Maki had decided to stay upstairs, listening to music in her room, but the need for a snack and something to do drew her out. She was positive that the extra games she’d downloaded would keep them occupied all afternoon.

A quick cold slice of pizza for refueling and Maki decided to sneak past the media room to the music room. There were yells and laughter and Nico trash talking. She sounded happier than she had since the quarantine started. Soon, maybe tomorrow, she’d go back to her place. Maki moved away from the door quickly before anyone noticed her, but it wasn’t quickly enough.

“DR. MAKI!!!!!” A voice Maki didn’t recognize screamed and a small weight slammed into her before she reached the sanctuary of the music room. “You saved Nico. You’re the best doctor.”

Maki froze and looked down. She’d seen pictures of Nico’s siblings. This was the middle one, a girl, Cocoa. Nico said she was constantly in motion. Maki believed that because as light as Cocoa was, she’d started dragging Maki back down the hall, “C’mon, Nico says you love MarioKart. Play with me. Cocoro only wants to play dancing games.” Cocoa let go and looked up at Maki eagerly. Did Nico look like that when she was a preteen, she definitely still had that much energy now.

Maki stepped back, “I can’t. I still have a couple days before I can hang out with people.”

“Nico said you’re probably fine.” Cocoa kept bouncing.

“I don’t want to take any risks?”

Cocoa’s expression turned serious, “Are your parents making you? Nico said they were really serious about quarantining.”

Did Nico tell her siblings everything? What had she said about Maki? Maybe Maki should have lingered in the hall and eavesdropped.

“I have to go. Go have fun with Nico.”

Nico’s voice saved her, “C’mon Cocoa. Nico approves of Maki being extra careful. We’ll come back sometime when she’s not quarantining, right, Maki?”

“Sure. Any time.” Maki wondered what games Nico’s little brother was enjoying and if Nico was really into dance games and had never mentioned it. Rin and Hanayo could come over sometime and…

“Have fun.” Maki headed for the back door, thinking about too many things for music..

“Thanks, Dr. Maki!” Cocoa waved, Maki nodded.

###

No moon yet. Maybe Maki would stay out here until dark. Nico’s mom would be taking the littler ones home soon and then Nico would probably nap and then there was Café Quarantine. Dance. Hanayo had finally agreed to the dance theme and Maki had practiced “One Note Samba” late last night. Nico would be singing “I Won’t Dance” while Maki played. Maki was not in a duet mood. Not really in a music mood, but…

Nico’s voice again, “Are you all right?”

Maki shrugged.

“Nico made you masks with music notes. They’re in the laundry.”

“Thanks.” Maki closed her eyes, refusing to look at Nico, hands behind her head, “Can you get Cocoro and Cocoa to stop calling me Dr. Maki. I didn’t save you.”

“So it’s all right if Cotaro does?”

Maki ignored that. She heard Nico sit in the chair to her left, “Nico is really grateful. All the pizza delivery saved Nico cooking. And the acoustics here.” Nico whistled.

“It was the right thing to do.”

“Nico feels special.” A nip of sarcasm, Maki grinned.

“When are you leaving?”

“Nico is going to make sure Maki is well.”

“I’ll be fine. You don’t have to stay for me.”

“You’ll have to swing by Nico’s apartment. We can do a Café Quarantine from there, but Nico doesn’t have a piano. I could borrow a keyboard. We could set up a little corner, it won’t be as fancy as your house, but people will…”

“This isn’t my house.”

Silence.

Nico was great at reading a room, at sensing what her audience, whether a customer or a drinking, dancing crowd wanted to hear, wanted to share. But not this one single person. Not Maki. If her knowledge of Maki was a mansion, Nico had only spent time on the ground floor and Maki had fled to the roof or the yard, having conversations with the stars in long silences that Nico watched from a distance. Nico knew there was a key, a way to understand Maki, but right now, her only guess was more time and Maki relaxing enough to trust her. So Nico went back to practical. And the thing they’d had in common at the first.

“Nico will almost be glad to get back to the coffee shop. Nico hasn’t slept this many hours since she was a baby, a very cute baby, but it’ll be nice to have…”

“I’m glad for you.” Maki tried not to snap, then opened her eyes, Nico was watching, almost too near, her expression curious, worried. Questions Maki didn’t want to hear gathered. Maki stood, “The samba needs more work. I’m glad your family’s having fun.”

“Maki?” Nico sounded hurt at Maki’s rush to leave. Maki wondered how she’d feel when Maki stopped showing up at the coffee shop. Would it be a relief? An answer Maki didn’t want right now. Scowling as a puzzled Nico stared, Maki didn’t acknowledge the invitation to talk, instead she fled upstairs, crushed a pillow to her chest, and buried tears before anyone could hear them.

###

Maki had lost the argument. Nico was back in the music room, in a tight, tight so so short little black dress that was going to interfere with Maki’s ability to read music if she glanced Nico’s way at all. And Maki suspected Nico knew that, from the teasing, take no prisoners twinkle in the ruby cannons. Which led to their first disagreement, Nico finding Maki’s trousers and open lilac linen shirt not nearly dressy enough.

“How does it look when the pianist doesn’t meet the dress code?” Nico pouted.

“There are no customers, Nico. We’re not sticking people in ties when they show up at the door. It’s just us.”

“And the camera. And the principle. Nico runs a classy place.” Nico spun, she was still wearing her mask, “Didn’t you say you enjoyed Hanayo harassing you. Well, now that I’m feeling better, you get in person service.”

“I didn’t ask for” Maki sneered, “In person service.”

“Nico knows what people want.”

“I want comfort.” Maki rolled up her sleeves. “It’s been a long day.”

“And you weren’t chasing kids around, which is tiring, if you didn’t know, so give Nico a break. And a perq,”

“A perq?”

“Nico is eye candy.” Nico waved her hands, showcasing her very well put together aesthetic, Maki completely caught by the curve of a calf. “Where’s Nico’s treat?”

Maki sat at the piano and the opening notes of “I Won’t Dance” filled the room.

“All right, that is a treat. And Nico appreciates it. But why don’t you match the music.”

Maki set her jaw, pivoted so she was facing Nico, who was now taller than her, which was very weird when you’re used to towering over the tiny tempest and now this set of stellar, torn from distant galaxies gems was dangerously close for the molten lava temps they were throwing off, “So I have to pretty up to be appreciated?”

Nico’s mouth opened and closed, like chewing gum was happening instead of speaking, and then a flood of charm and apology rushed Maki as Nico’s hands seemingly tried to sculpt the gown she wanted Maki to wear in the air between them. “Nico didn’t mean that at all. Maki’s doing Nico so many favors and you’ve had so much fun dressing up, Nico can tell, Maki’s so classy, surely there’s a little black dress in your closet…

Maki raised a hand, “That is a lovely dress.” She fidgeted with her collar. “I may, just may, be slightly underdressed so I’ll see what I can find.”

“Ooohh, Nico can help.”

“No.”

Nico sat on the piano bench, wondering if Maki was going to go for a gown or a cocktail dress. Most of Maki’s gowns were off the shoulder, so that would definitely be...Nico sighed, pointless fantasies unless Nico spoke up. Obviously, Maki was losing interest in the audience she had here.

Maki came back with a tuxedo jacket and a fedora, her smirk daring Nico to say something. Nico pulled a rose out of the floral arrangement in the hallway and handed it to Maki, who blushed so adorably Nico wanted to kiss the tip of her nose.

And then without any more talk, the evening’s Café started.

This is just a little samba built upon a single note Other notes are bound to follow but the root is still that note Now this new one is the consequence of the one we've just been through As I'm bound to be the unavoidable consequence of you

Nico was singing, showing surprising verve and vigor in the quick steps of her dance as she swayed into "the unavoidable consequence of you” That summed up Nico nicely, Maki thought. The Brazilian songs seemed to suit her, maybe that was why Maki kept coming back to them. Lively, vibrant, 24/7, a bossa nova beauty of complex harmonies twisting through an irresistible rhythm that was beginning to be the constant, too rapid default beating of Maki’s heart. “Estou com saudades de você” the Brazilians said. “I miss you soon” Maki thought, an inexact translation, but one that carried the feeling of the ease with Nico that she’d barely had and the loss of proximity that would derail any chance their connection would grow.

Nico came up behind Maki, the sudden proximity a fever of its own, and Maki felt fingers stroke through her hair, stealing her fedora, and then quicksilver Nico was back at the camera, for her audience. It was growing every night, Nico’s recovery spiking viral likes and comments. Hanayo was about to start selling branded masks and fuzzy socks.

Nico said something, then the camera was off, and Nico’s complete attention was on Maki. So Maki ducked, taking cover in the samba again, singing

There's so many people who can talk And talk and talk and just say nothing Or nearly nothing I have used up all the scale I know And at the end I've come to nothing Or, nearly nothing

Nico laughed, “The unavoidable consequence of Nico, huh?”

Maki grinned, “I didn’t say it.”

“No.” Nico was behind Maki, her hands sliding down Maki’s jacket, playing a quick, almost right chord as she softly sang in Maki’s ear.

So, I come back to my first note as I must come back to you I will pour into that one note all the love I feel for you Any one who wants the whole Show-Re-Mi Fa-So-La-Ti-Do He will find himself with no show Better play the note you know

Maki in a daring move, slid her hands under Nico’s and played the finish.

Now was the time, “I’m quitting the coffee shop, Nico.”

Nico risked a quick, loose hug, “Yeah, your parents probably would not like you being that exposed. You’ll be in Princess in a Tower mode.”

“I’m an adult, Nico.” Maki could have cried for the wavery betrayal of her voice, “I’m going to turn 21.”

“Don’t drink your way through Chicago. Trust Nico.” Nico stepped back.

“Why? What did you do?” Maki spun to face Nico.

“You’re still too young for that story...when’s your birthday? Nico will bake you a cake.”

“Next week”

“What’s your favorite flavor. Besides pizza.”

Maki shrugged.

“What are you going to do when you’re not working? Coronavirus kinda closed colleges. Did you pick a major?” Nico had settled into the farthest corner of the couch. Maki took a quick look, but the legs were too distracting, and Nico’s exquisite profile looked even sharper with the weight of serious thought shadowing perfect angles. Maki thought she might swoon.

“I have a plan.”

“Tell Nico.”

Maki shook her head, turning back to the piano as she blushed.

“C’mon tell Nico."

Maki began to play. A random song. Maki had been listening to the NYC Jazz Quartet and Vocalist Naski Young Cho. “Paris Match” had been looping. Maki could hear the lyrics in her head so she started singing.

As I tread the boulevard floor Will I see once more; Because you've clouded my mind 'Till then I'm biding my time I'm only sad in a natural way And I enjoy sometimes feeling this way The gift you gave is desire The match that started my fire Empty nights with nothing to do I sit and think, every thought is for you; I get so restless and bored So I go out once more; I hate to feel so confined I feel like I'm wasting my time

Maybe not so random a choice. Maki pushed back from the piano, shaking her head. Too many fever/fire/heat analogies. Good thing she wasn’t a painter or there would be rubies and lava and flames licking every wall she could put paint to. Instead, she put that excess in every note she had the energy to play and then hoped to collapse into dreamless sleep.

“What was the name of that song?” Nico’s voice was quiet.

“Paris Match.”

“That’s on the playlist with that NYC Jazz quartet Korean singer you’ve been listening to, what was her name?”

“Naski Young Cho.”

“Her style works for you?”

Nico wasn’t going to ask about the lyrics. General music questions were safe. Maki yawned, starting to relax. “She’s all right. Had to get used to her voice a little.”

“Did you have to get used to Nico’s?”

“No.”

A hand was suddenly gentle on Maki’s shoulder and Nico’s voice was stripped of all affectation, caring, honest, “You’re not wasting your time with music, Maki.”

Maki’s shrug was the smallest of gestures, but Nico’s hand squeezed gently in response. Another yawn.

“C’mon, Chopin, let’s get you to bed.”

“Satie.”

“The weird French guy? Okay, Ms. Surreal, tell Nico your melting clock dreams over breakfast.”

Not if they were anything like the last ones she remembered, Nico in a costume stolen from Cabaret or Chicago. Should anyone think about fishnets that fondly? Maki let Nico push her toward the stairs. When had she last actually slept for longer than a couple of hours? Maybe, giving in to the weariness closing her eyes, would reset her mood. A mood reset, to one less incendiary, was essential.

###

Maki was eating cereal, watching SheRa, and not thinking about Nico or anything. Chewing. Just chewing. She’d been ignoring Rin and parent texts all morning. Nico would probably be leaving soon and then it would be time for Maki to take that step. But right now, this was a pocket of time when she was living in a space where Nico’s voice could be heard and she was going to treasure every minute of that. Netossa...Maki grinned as the character teased and challenged her wife.

“Hey Maki!” Nico fell over the back of the couch, a controlled trajectory, startling Maki and causing her cereal bowl to spill onto the table. Nico dropped her head on Maki’s shoulders, eyes mischievous, “This is too much fun.”

Maki stood up, but Nico pulled her back down, leaning forward with a dish towel, “Nico came prepared.”

“Um...we shouldn’t be…” Maki started.

“Nico is fine. And chock full of antibodies so Maki couldn’t give it to me if you tried.”

“No one knows how it works, Nico.” Maki slid further down the cushion.

“No, but that’s a pretty good guess. Nico did research, talked to her doctor.”

“Papa told you…”

“Well, I didn’t ask your father if it was okay if I made his daughter jump off the couch, squealing, no, but we went over the basics.”

“Oh.”

Silence and then Nico sounding nervous, “Nico’s going to go back to her apartment tomorrow. If you come over, Nico will cook dinner and we can duet.”

Maki didn’t know what to say. Nico was leaving. No more nights like last night. Maki alone again. Nico off with her friends, her family, doing all the thousand things, without Maki, that Nico had done before this quarantine.

“Maki? Did you hear me?” Nico poked Maki’s shoulder, her expression comic hurt.

Maki shook her head, forcing herself to look more thoughtful than morose. “I can’t just put the piano in my pocket.”

“Eli has a keyboard we can borrow. Since dancing didn’t work out last night, we’ll try it when we’re all in one location.”

Maki fidgeted. “I’m not comfortable with…”

“Eli’s been careful. Nico has windows.”

Maki shut off the screen. “There’s so many variables. And no way to know if anyone’s been exposed.” Maki rubbed her forehead. “This was the easiest part, wasn’t it.”

Turns out Nico had a not smiley tone. “Not for Nico.”

“Sorry. I guess it got pretty rough”

“It was. Don’t catch it.”

“You seem so much better. I’m glad. ” Maki smiled, reaching for her bowl, put the dish towel in it, “I’m going to make coffee. Want some?”

“Sounds good. And then we have to decide on tonight’s songs.”

“I’m tired of themes.” Maki announced as she left the room.

“Well, then talk to your cute, pushy friend who texts Nico 100 times a day about them.”

“I think I lost her number.”

Nico snorted and hurried Maki down the hall.

##

“Are we moving Café Quarantine to Brazil” Nico sounded exasperated. “If you really want to play this “Desafinado” tune, Nico’s choice doesn’t really go. What’s the title mean?”

“Out of tune.” Maki completely concentrated on her piano, hoping Nico’s questions would end there. She didn’t really want a discussion of lyrics.

“Nico is not out of tune.”

“That’s not what…” Maki played several chords, “Anyway, I’m going to play the instrumental, you don’t have to worry about it.”

“But Nico wants to keep the mood,” Nico was flopped on her stomach on the couch, staring at Maki, “It’s a good mood. Nico likes it, but Nico knows Brazilian coffee not this…why are you in this mood?”

“Samba smooth...it makes me smile.” Maki stopped playing, staring at Nico. ”Might work really well for you too, the melody’s playful, simple, I’d be doing most of the work…”

“The accompanist underestimates the amount of personality Nico adds.”

Trust me I don’t, Maki thought, but she rolled her eyes at Nico

“There’s a few more I’ve been practicing...I could print out lyrics for you…” Maki paused, “It would be a challenge to learn it before tonight.”

“Not for Nico.”

Maki chuckled, “Give me 5 minutes.”

Nico flipped, laying on her back, “Then you’ll have to keep up with Nico. You’re used to Not Well Nico. Full speed Nico is going to knock you out.”

Maki could only hope for a soft landing.

###

Maki had played “Desafinado”, with Nico fidgeting and gleaming like she was up to something. As soon as Maki was finished, Nico was in front of the camera, applauding madly.

“Maki’s just the best, right. Nico’s been so lucky to have in house music like this while she was healing. Nico’s been spoiled.”

Maki watched suspiciously as Nico continued to bounce. They were supposed to go right into the duet but Maki got the feeling improvisation was about to happen.

“Mak’s obviously been missing coffee and Nico so she’s been playing all these bossa nova songs for her beautiful boss”

Maki snorted.

“But Nico’s about to head home,” Nico paused, “Don’t worry Café Quarantine will continue, Nico would miss it too much, and Nico doesn’t want anyone coughing like…” Nico’s energy dipped for a moment, then Nico recovered, “But we’re all going to take care of each other and be fine, Nico insists.”

“Can I start playing?” Maki drawled.

Nico turned and GLARED, “Nico is giving a pep talk.”

Eye roll.

“Maki’s nicer than she pretends.” Nico announced to the camera, “but you’ve been watching her play, you know that.”

“Nico.”

“Since our piano genius has been in a Rio mood, Nico recorded Maki playing this song and will now add words.”

The intro to "Quiet Nights of Quiet Stars" began and Nico sang with a gentle longing that surprised Maki, who would have loudly disagreed that Nico knew anything about quiet anything.

Quiet nights of quiet stars Quiet chords from my guitar Floating on the silence that surrounds us

Quiet thoughts and quiet dreams Quiet walks by quiet streams…

### Maki wanted to just sit and inhale the mood in the room after the last note, the quiet, calm, the connection, but of course, it didn’t last for long. “And now we have one more song for tonight.” With a wink and her soon to be patented not quite devil horns gesture, Nico tossed the audience back to Maki, which caused Maki to fumble for a minute. She’d been sitting, caught up in this rare glimpse of reserved Nico.

But now she had to focus, roll her shoulders down, dash into the first verse Someone to hold me tight That would be very nice Someone to love me right That would be very nice Someone to understand Each little dream in me Someone to take my hand And be a team with me

And then Nico joined in. So nice, life would be so nice If one day I'd find Someone who would take my hand And samba through life with me

And Maki dropped out, the rhythm making her think that perhaps she should be dancing with Nico rather than the piano. This song seemed to cry out for more responsiveness than resonance. Someone to cling to me Stay with me right or wrong Someone to sing to me Some little samba song Someone to take my heart And give her heart to me Someone who's ready to Give love a start with me Oh yeah, that would be so nice I could see you and me, that would be nice

What the hell Maki thought, stood up and offered her hand to Nico. So nice, life would be so nice If one day I'd find Someone who would take my hand And samba through life with me

Nico was a sure, steady dancer, obviously hearing the song in her head as she and Maki stepped quickly around the music room, laughing. Nico slowed down when they passed in front of the camera.

“I think we’re sambaing down to Rio. Good night!”And Nico stopped recording without really interrupting the flow of their dance.

“It’s too bad you didn’t listen to Nico’s ‘wear a bikini for the full Brazilian effect’ suggestion.” Nico smirked.

Maki started to stiffen, but just kept moving to the music in her head. She didn’t really need to answer Nico, did she?

“So can we start the ‘Kiss’ theme week tomorrow?” Nico had pulled Maki closer. “Both your pushy friends keep telling me it’s the only thing to do next.”

“Are they?”

Nico nodded.

“They are pushy.”

“But cute. And Nico doesn’t really mind.” A hesitation, Nico was glowing, Maki suddenly wanted a room full of candles and a pianist sensitive to the mood ready to slide easily into the next song. It was so easy with music, to build the mood, to know the next note, the next step, the next song. “Do you?”

Had Maki dropped out of the conversation again. “Do I what?”

“Mind if it’s Kiss?”

“You don’t mean the band, right? Hanayo’s a little too fond of metal for me. But Rin just headbangs along.”

Nico stopped. “You’re terrible at mood. How do you play the piano so well?”

Maki shrugged.

Nico almost threw up her arms, but Maki caught them and pulled Nico closer, “I don’t mind.”

No candles, no music, no warning, but Maki suddenly knew what was next. And Nico was just close enough, just looking up enough, deep banked embers glowing in her eyes just inviting enough. Maki blanked, and then Nico was a blurry warmth, close enough that Maki could feel the smoothness of a cheek, and Maki was going in for a second kiss before she even noticed the first.

A/N: There will be a brief epilogue.

And @auyeahaugust is almost finished. Thanks again for the inspiration. And now to get back to my fics in progress. 

[dailyaudiobible]

01/06/2021 DAB Transcript

Genesis 13:5-15:21, Matthew 5:27-48, Psalms 6:1-10, Proverbs 1:29-33

Today is the 6th day of January welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it is a joy and a privilege and an honor to be here with you today as we move through…well this is the first hump day of the year isn’t it. So, we move through the center of our first full week together and I don't know if you feel like you're getting moved in, but I feel like I'm starting to feel that rhythm of a new year begin to get established and kinda get moved through the holiday season and feel like now we’re starting to move into building what this year is going to look like and build it through our thoughts, our words and our deeds because that's how life…that’s how life shapes up. But to become aware of God's presence in all of it and our utter dependence upon him in it will indeed be the path toward freedom. So, let's dive in. We’re reading from the Christian Standard Bible this week. Genesis chapter 13 verse 5 through 15 verse 21.

Commentary:

Okay. Let’s do what we did yesterday and kind of work our way backwards because wisdom is still introducing herself and what we are hearing…well…what we are hearing is what we probably desire. Like, who among us does not want to live securely and be undisturbed by the dread of danger? Can we like all say yeah? Yeah, like so much of the energy of life is spent to arrange for that. Wisdom is saying, that's kind of a byproduct of being wise. So, once again we are reminded to pay close attention to the voice of wisdom. And once again right here at the beginning of the year I remind you of the Daily Audio Proverb and the Daily Audio Psalm. This is the Daily Audio Bible and we’re going through the whole thing, but the Daily Audio Proverb lets you go through the entire book of Proverbs in a month and it takes less than five minutes a day. So, it’s like unfiltered wisdom is available and you poor that into your life over and over and over and over and you start remembering it and it starts seeping down inside of you and then you start remembering it when you need it and then you start becoming aware that you're listening to the voice of wisdom and you’re becoming wise. And, so, let’s make it a point of the year to become wise. What would it look like if our wisdom increases exponentially throughout this year? That could be a game changer for the rest of our lives. It could be a game changer for future generations because we begin building foundations. So. well, all we can do here is to state the obvious. We should listen to wisdom. Whether or not we do, that's one of those choices that we make. And the choices that we make end up telling the story of our lives over this year. We can choose to seek wisdom, or we can choose to ignore it. But I think it's already become abundantly clear what happens either way.

And then we move into the Psalms that we read today and what we heard…what we heard was honesty, right? Honesty. “Be gracious to me Lord I'm weak. Heal me, my bones are shaking. My whole being is shaking with terror. Are you there? How long? Turn, rescue me, save me.” This should be talking our language. We should be reading in the Bible things that we have thought and said, and we should understand then the Bible isn’t this book that is God's grand attempt to shame humanity for every failure that happens. What we’re seeing in the Bible is the heart cry to God, “I need you I’ve lost the plot again. I've lost the story again. I’ve forgotten who I am again. I’m lost again. I went into my own desires again. I ran into a brick wall again. I need you.” And the Bible affirms that that heart cry prayer is okay because we’re gonna hear it for the rest of the year at times in different books, especially in the Psalms. So, can we just state here, God is not looking for your dishonesty, doesn't care about it at all. The stuff that we say to each other, right? We’re having a conversation we’re catching up and we’re giving a curated version of a story or a curated version of the last couple months or whatever and it's all just nice and tidy how we want to tell the story but so much is skipped and it's not…it's true but is not the complete truth. The Bible is giving us permission. God desires complete honesty. How else do you base a foundation for any kind of relationship without honesty? And, so, let's carry that with us as we move forward - honesty, being true.

Because when we go back to Matthew and Jesus is continuing the sermon on the Mount what we’re beginning to see here is an invitation to live true without pretense, that this is actually the way human beings were created to be - true. Falseness is the mask that we wear. You remember that story we read a couple days ago in Genesis 3, the serpent in the garden, tree of the knowledge of good and evil, all of this. They ate, right? And then they were ashamed, and they hid and what we begin to find in the message of Jesus is you don't have to hide anymore ever again. You have permission to be true. In fact, that's the trajectory, that's the transformation that happens within us, that there is no falseness in us, that we are not hiding and ashamed, that we are not wearing a false mask, that we are children of the most-high God, we have already as a gift received the highest thing that is possible. We’re children of God and God made this world for us and we are upon it because we are created in His image. The falseness isn't doing anything but keeping everybody on earth hiding from each other in big and small ways. So, to step towards truth, though, we realize pretty quickly…yeah, this is not the…how do you…it's almost impossible to operate this…this way in our culture. This is the process of sanctification and transformation that is happening within us. It doesn’t have to happen today. We need to learn the ways of truth and the Holy Spirit will lead us into all truth. That’s what the Bible promises us.

Prayer:

Father we thank You. We thank You for Your word. We thank You for the way that it does what it does no matter what year it is, no matter even what century or millennia it is Your word is a mirror into our souls and it is a lamp for our feet and a light to our path showing us the way that we should go. Holy Spirit come. Help us to be aware and pay attention. What we’re going to find is that that's what we need more than anything, is to just be paying attention. So, many of our decisions are made as reactions to something when the voice of wisdom will show us in advance so that we have chosen in advance how we will handle all the situations of life. But that's a learned thing and we can't do it without You. And, so, we’re asking, we’re crying out to You. Give us wisdom. Show us the way to go. Lead us on the narrow path that leads to life we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Happy new year Daily Audio Bible family this is Denise sometimes known as the Airport Missionary. I just wanted to wish you all a happy new year and I…I have been hanging around in the background listening and listening, but I wanted to let you all know and thank you for your prayers. I…the job that you prayed me into has really been a very interesting experience about the people who need me to be there for them. And, so, on behalf of those people whose identities I will keep quiet, but they thank you for sending the them because they really needed the love and the comfort that you prayed into me and that I was able to bring to them. And then also for those of you who prayed for me to my husband and I to be able to conceive. We are not pregnant today but we did find a different doctor who is really amazing and regardless of outcome I just feel like I went to the right place and he has said things that made a lot more sense and that I really believe that you all opened the door and gave me courage to sit down and talk to someone different and tell my story and that is the gift that I will never be able to truly repay until I meet you all in heaven. But in the meantime, gracious heavenly Father I just pray over my family here at the Daily Audio Bible family. I pray over Brian. I pray over the new year. I pray over Father Your Holy Spirit to go to every ear that hears this and to let this ministry expand to find more ears. And Father let this year be a year of healing and redemption and growth for Your great body of Christ through this ministry. And let all hear this message on a daily basis…

Hello, I’m not sure whether the first recording I did was sent. This is my first time, so I’m just trying things. My name Zinab Genno. I’m sending this message from London. Actually, I came to know about this Daily Audio Bible through Alan Parr. I was watching one of his videos on YouTube. So, I went along and I downloaded the app and this is my first time. I’ve never really read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation. I was a Muslim converted to Christianity. So, I will really need your support and I’m hoping to go through this journey with all of you as a community and I’m…yeah…I just need you’re lifting up. I just need your support. I…I came from predominantly Muslim background. So, I would do with some support and prayer just for strength in my faith and be able to…to fellowship with you guys and…and…I will be…I really really appreciate if I get some prayers and just encouragement from you…from all of you for this journey that I am embarking on this year. So, I’m hoping to spend the rest of this 2021 getting to know you and getting to know God more, coming closer to God. So, I look forward to this. I’m excited. You know, I’m both the Chronological and the Daily Audio Bible. Thank you.

Hello, everyone I’m, Selah from Canada and I just wanted to say that I appreciated two messages from first-time callers. So, I appreciate all the messages but two especially today really just hit my heart and I wanted to say I am praying for both of you. One is the young lady from Arizona and the other is the Cross Carrier from the Bay Area. I want you to know that I’m…I’m going to carry both of you in my heart as we go forward. I’m praying for you. Thank you for opening up the way you did. Your vulnerability is beautiful. I love it when people are real, and I think it gives others the opportunity to be real as well. So, thank you. I appreciate you. And Brian I appreciate you and your ministry very much. I’m a first-time caller but I have listened through the Daily Audio Bible before and this is my desire this year as well. So, thanks again. Love to all of you from Selah.

Hi folks this is James from the UK and just wanted to say a really happy new year to all the DABbers. I know that’s a little late, but it is so nice to be able to share with you and to be part of this community. Massive massive encouragement. I started listening now back in…we were living in Switzerland back in 2009, 2010. So, it’s been a long journey and it’s just so great to start another year and listen to people getting so excited about the Daily Audio Bible. And I just wanted to…I just wanted to pray for the long term listener for Arizona. She left a request for support and encouragement. She was tearful and I just felt I just want to pray. Lord, will you bless her, will you bless in a way this year that makes her feel your strength, your love, and your support around her, that she would know that you are there to take the burdens, that your yoke is light, and she’s yoked with you. I just pray that she would really experience your peace and she experience Holy Spirit you revealing yourself through helping her to solve and move through some of the challenges that she faces right now. In Your name, in Your holy name Jesus. Amen.

Hi, my name is Renzo from Maryland. I just want to pray for the one girl in Arizona on the other line. Father God I just pray that her faith is just…becomes stronger and for her to get closer to You every day and just thank You for bringing us here thank You for the Daily Audio Bible and thank You for them having encouragement every day and just thank You for the platform Jesus that You provide. Just please help that girl to just get closer to God and have faith in You. And we all fall short. We all fall down. __ for her faith to become strong in Jesus’ name we pray. Amen. God bless you guys. Thank you for your ministry.

[danyka-fendyr]

Absence of Good

Chapter 3: Everybody Has a Hometown

Okay, so it’s a little late, but like I said last week, I decided not to release a chapter of this last week because I was putting out so many one-shots. I think I should be able to keep up a mostly consistent upload schedule but probably not a specific day. Oh well. Can’t have everything I guess. This chapter is particularly dark for a number of reasons, so I would suggest the faint of heart skip it. Also I’ve been watching a lot of horror movies lately, and so even though I haven’t seen Midsommar yet, I know it’s about a cult so that concept kind of inspired this chapter a little. Anyway, hope ya’ll enjoy.

Additional Note: Timeline wise I wanted to keep this pretty vague so while Reid’s self-proclaimed age in this chapter would make this circa season 6, you can imagine him in whatever season you like.

Permanent Taglist: @dreamwritesimagines @rhabakoli

AoG Taglist: @pancakefancake @prettyboyspenerrr

Wordcount: 3365

Warnings: Death. Child predators. Child death. Violence. Mentions of sexual assault. Pedophilia. Bad relationship with parents. Mentions of cults.

“Loneliness does not come from having no people around one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.”

-Carl Jung

“I’m sorry sir, you said we’re going where?” you said.

“Is there a problem, Y/L/N?” 

Hotch’s face never moved past ambivalence, but if it did, he would have been raising an eyebrow at you right now. He probably didn’t think that was workplace appropriate. Rossi, from across the table, had no such scruples and was openly making a face. The perks of seniority.

“No, sir. My apologies.”

“Alright then. Wheels up in 30,” Hotch said,

Spencer gave you a questioning look as you headed for your go bag, but all you offered in return was a noncommittal smile. The less everyone knew about this, the better. The last thing you needed was a big fuss.

You boarded the plane with the same mindset, hoping that your earlier surprise and commentary had blown over. Even if it hadn’t though, Hotch was not one to waste time on trivialities. Before anyone could ask you anything, Hotch was talking about the case.

“Three children, all in 3 weeks. Our unsub’s cooling-off period is basically non-existant.”

“That’s not characteristic of a preferential offender. They usually don’t have a big enough victim pool for that kind of speed,” you said.

“True. The victims cross gender lines as well. One girl, two boys. No way our guy is a preferential offender,” Morgan said.

“Assuming it is a guy,” Emily chimed in.

“You think it’s a woman?” you asked.

“It’s possible. Anything is on the table with an unsub that crosses the gender line,” she replied.

“It could be a woman, but statistically it’s far more likely to be a man. Men committed 89.5% of homicides in the United States of America between the years of 1980 and 2008, so while I certainly don’t think we should rule out the possibility, I wouldn’t put any concrete gender on our offender yet,” Spencer said.

“Alright, so we’ve got a guy with no cooling-off period who’s killing kids. Why? Is there any evidence of sexual assault?” JJ asked.

“The M.E.’s report doesn’t mention any on the victim’s examined so far,” Rossi said.

“Maybe it is a woman,” you theorized. “Children would be small enough to overpower, and the lack of sexual assault suggests a female unsub.”

“You may be right,” Hotch said. “We’ll know more when we get there and can examine the bodies firsthand. Spencer and Y/N, you can work with the M.E. on this one. Morgan, Prentiss, you head to the last dumpsite. Rossi, you’re with JJ. You two head to the previous two dumpsites, see if there’s anything left you might be able to find. We should be landing soon.”

As soon as your feet hit the tarmac, you felt a sense of dread. Part of it was, of course, your impending trip to the M.E. You weren’t a fan at the best of times, but kids...kids were hard. Very, very hard. It went beyond that though.

The smell of the air, the wind tugging softly at your hair, the feeling of the ground underneath your feet. The sad truth was that there was nothing you hated more than being home.

You were quiet as you got in the car, keeping your eyes on your phone. Your parents knew you were here by now, and they wanted you to come over for dinner when your case was finished. That was the last thing you wanted. You put your phone away, deciding to stare out the window at the too-familiar scenery instead.

“Are you okay?” Spencer asked.

He was driving and you were in the passenger seat on the way to the M.E., which unfortunately gave him an uninhibited view of your face.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just not looking forward to this.” Excuses, excuses.

“Yeah, me neither. This is going to be a rough case,” Spencer admitted.

“You’re telling me.”

“I wish I could say it gets easier, but...”

“When this job gets easier, they won’t need us anymore.” you sighed.

“Yeah. Something like that. I wouldn’t mind a world that doesn’t need the BAU though. Would you?”

“No. No, I suppose I wouldn’t. What would you do, if you weren’t in the BAU?” you asked.

“Me? Well...it’s kind of stupid.”

“No such thing.” you turned in your seat, facing your body towards him.

“When I was a kid, I had this dream...I wanted to be a magician, you know?”

“Wait, you can do magic tricks?” A grin curved across your face, utterly delighted.

“Uh, yeah. When the occasion calls for it.” Spencer lifted a hand off the wheel to rub the back of his neck.

“That’s amazing! Will you do one for me sometime?” 

Spencer glanced over at you, alert and smiling, looking happier than you had since boarding the plane.

“...Sure.” 

He smiled softly at you, and it was your turn to be embarrassed.

“So, what about you. If not the FBI, then what?” He asked.

Oh boy. This case was just going to be a walk down memory lane, wasn’t it?

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe a psychologist or something.”

“That’s what you wanted to be growing up? A psychologist?”

You knew it was bad when Spencer Reid was judging you for your goals being too serious and academic.

“I mean, not as a kid, obviously, but when I was in college I thought about it,” you deflected.

“So what did you want to be when you were a kid?”

“It’s dumb,” you said.

“No such thing.”

“I hate it when you use my own words against me, Dr. Reid.”

He just waited, grinning rather cheekily.

“Okay, mister, you want to know what I wanted to be when I was a kid? I wanted to be a singer, alright? I wanted to learn how to play guitar and write my own songs and play sold-out stadiums. Like I said, dumb kid’s dream.”

“That’s not dumb. I mean, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not exactly up to date on music or...pop culture in general, I guess, but that’s not dumb. It sounds awesome, actually. I didn’t know you could play the guitar.”

“I can’t,” you said. “I said I wanted to learn, not that I did.”

“Why not?”

You shrugged. “Parents didn’t think it was a good idea. I got piano lessons instead. They were...educational.”

Fun would have been the wrong word.

“So your parents were strict?”

“Not exactly. They would like you though,” you said, steering the conversation away from yourself.

“You think so?”

“Yeah. I have dinner with them this week probably and I kind of wish I could download even half the information in your brain so I could generate some truly impressive dinner table conversation.”

“I could make you some flashcards if you like.”

You laughed. “Thanks, Spence. I don’t think it would be as good as the real deal though.”

“Well, I could always come. The entire team could show. Make it a party,” he joked.

You went silent, thinking about it. “Gosh, there would be nothing I would love more than that. Sadly, you guys won’t even be in town anymore.”

“Anymore? I thought you were planning on flying out to see your parents?” Spencer asked, confused.

“Why would I when they’re right here?”

“This is your hometown?” 

“Sure is. It kind of sucks, right? One too many serial killers for my taste, if I’m honest with you.”

“Yeah. You may have a point there,” Spencer agreed, parking the car.

“So what are we looking at here?” You asked the M.E.

“This is a bit unorthodox, all things considered. You probably get that a lot though.” You waited patiently for him to continue. “It looks like there are no signs of sexual assault, but there is some..unique physical mutilation.”

“Unique how?” Spencer asked.

The M.E. moved towards the bodies. “See these cuts here? The marks make up a pattern. These weren’t done to kill. They’re more ritualistic in nature. The cause of death was actually a stab wound to the chest with acute pericardial tamponade. Or in other words, they were stabbed in the heart with a very long, very sharp knife.”

“What is this here, on the left shoulderblade?” Spencer asked, looking up from where he was bent over the body of the newest victim.

“It looks like...a tattoo of a turtle. Do the other victims have these?”

You examined the other two bodies, finding the same markings. They were surprisingly artistic, all things considered.

“These weren’t done by an amateur,” you mumbled.

“No. These were definitely ritualistic killings. We should have been called in sooner.”

You headed back to the team with your information, Know that you knew more about the bodies, it was becoming very clear what kind of unsub you were dealing with. Now there was a new question.

“Is it possible we’re dealing with multiple unsubs here?” Morgan asked.

“It could be. Given the ritualistic nature of these killings, this could be some kind of cult. Reid, what do you think the significance of the turtle is?” Hotch asked.

“Well, turtles popularly represent longevity, given their own lifespans, so it’s entirely possible that our unsub or unsubs think that they can achieve immortality with these killings.”

“What about the cuts on the body? You said those were in a pattern?” Emily asked.

“Yeah. Nothing decipherable, but we’re still working on it,” you said.

“Well, keep working. Morgan, I want you and JJ to work with Garcia and see what you can come up with on the tattoo angle. See if you can find anyway who would be able to do work like this. Garcia, I also want you looking into any local cults or societies. Anything you find that sends up red flags, send it to Prentiss. Prentiss, Rossi, you two can check out whatever Garcia sends you. Got it?”

Everyone hummed their assent, and you had the unfortunate job of getting to go back to the pictures sent from the M.E. It had been hours of staring at the carvings on the children’s stomach and backs and several cups of coffee before you started to get an idea. Concerned it might be half-hallucination, you called Spencer over from his own space.

“Is it just me, or do these marks kind of look like a tree? Long and straight on the bottom and then they curve up and out, like branches. Are you seeing that too?”

Spencer tilted his head, staring at them. “Actually...that might make sense. On the one hand, there’s a correlation to the tree of life. But on the other hand, turtles were also historically a symbol of mother nature. Which means...”

“Which means we might not be dealing with a bunch of Nicolas Flamel groupies after all. This could be the work of a group of eco-terrorists.”

“We have to tell Hotch.”

You made short work of the case once you realized the people you were actually after. Between the tattoo artist connection and the fact that your town did not have that many cults (though definitely more than you would have liked), it didn’t take you long to find your group. Apparently, they thought that if they sacrificed 8 people, children specifically for their purity, they could cleanse the Earth and...eliminate global warming or something. You had sort of stopped listening after the, “Yeah, we definitely did it,” part.

“Is Y/N not coming?” JJ asked, slinging her go-bag over her shoulder.

“Nope, afraid not. I have to have a family dinner.” you shrugged, hoping that if you played casual they would just...forget about it.

“You forgot to tell everyone?” Spencer spoke up, and you froze. “Y/N told me she wanted everyone to come to dinner tonight. Figured it would be fun to have a team dinner and a family dinner all at once.”

“Awww, little mama, you shouldn’t have.” 

Derek smiled, and you mustered a smile back. On the one hand, you were grateful to Spencer. You had certainly not been looking forward to dinner with your family. However...you also weren’t sure you wanted your family anywhere near the team. 

“Well, I know the best places to eat in town, so whoever is down...”

“Count me in,” Rossi said.

“I’m always available for good food.” That was Prentiss, giving you a knowing look that you would probably have to deal with later.

“Will and the boys weren’t actually expecting me home until tomorrow, and I just can’t miss a one time opportunity like this.” JJ smiled at you.

“Looks like you have the whole team.”

“Awesome!” Oh, this could go so badly for you.

On the way to the restaurant, you texted your parents to let them know there would be company. The place you had chosen to eat was a little hole in the wall diner with great burgers and a cute 50′s theme, and lucky for you, it was never very busy. You might have to push a few tables together, but there would be space for you.

You had all stopped off at the hotel beforehand, and you were nervous now that someone would comment on your appearance like they had all obviously wanted to when they first saw you. You didn’t look like your normal self. You looked...muted. Like someone had washed out all the color and replaced it with a solid layer of the most boring shade of beige. Rossi had saved you though with an elegant compliment, saying that you looked as lovely as ever. The man certainly had tact.

Hotch held the door open as you all entered the diner, and it didn’t take you long to find your parents. 2 people sitting at a table for 9. They stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Sweetheart!” 

Your mother smiled warmly, getting up to hug you. You father followed shortly after, and you introduced your team.

“It’s nice to meet all of you. Y/N talks about you a lot,” your father said.

“When she calls.” 

There was a hint of sincere bitterness to your mother’s joke, and you forced a brighter smile in an effort to fight it off.

“Oh, Mom, you know how it is. Busy all the time,” you said, letting Spencer pull out your chair for you before you both sat down.

The poor boy had, of course, no idea what he’d done. Now your Dad was staring at him skeptically, like Spencer was trying to get into your pants. Heaven forbid he have manners.

“So, Mr. Reid, what’s your role on the team?” your Dad asked.

“He’s a Dr., Dad. It’s Dr. Reid. And he’s our resident genius.” 

You couldn’t help yourself. You didn’t mean to speak over Spencer like that, and you knew it was rude, but the urge to defend him had risen up so strong that it had just come out. You hoped he would forgive you, and you guessed by the soft smile he gave you that he did.

“What are you a doctor in, then?” your Dad grumbled.

“I actually have 3 PhD’s, sir. In mathematics, chemistry and engineering.”

Maybe you had no right to look so proud, but you did anyway.

Your mother’s eyebrows shot up. “Impressive! And how old are you?”

You nearly groaned. In sharp contrast to your father, your mother was now trying to play the matchmaker. Joy.

“I’m 29.”

“Our boy wonder here is pretty impressive.” Morgan looked just as proud as you when he said it, giving you a smirk you didn’t understand.

Your Dad did not look happy about this development, so you spoke before he could.

“I mean, the whole team is impressive really. It’s crazy getting to work with all of you.” You laughed a little bit.

The conversation continued easier after that, steering away from work and into more mundane things like your childhood. In fact, everything was going fine. Or it was until your dear old Dad brought up your brother.

“You know, my only regret is that your brother couldn’t be here tonight. It’s a shame he’s away on business. He works hard though. Does important work.”

You did your best fake of a pleasant smile. “Of course.”

Your brother’s work was far from important. He worked as an insurance guy, for Pete’s sake. Your parents would never forgive you for being absent so often, but your brother? Oh, he could do no wrong.

“What? Do you disagree, Y/N?” The confrontation in your father’s tone was thinly veiled.

“No, of course not,” you said blandly. “I’m sure whatever he’s doing tonight is important. Pass the ketchup?”

Your mother gave it to you, leaving your father free to engage in his favorite activity. Picking a fight.

“I mean, can’t really get mad at him, can we? He calls home all the time, comes by for dinner frequently. He’s a good kid. Very successful.” You could practically taste the implication that you weren’t.

You refused to rise to the bait.

“Yeah, yeah. He’s definitely got the time for all that.” You nodded, unable to resist a subtle dig.

“Oh, and you don’t? Not 5 minutes to phone your mother?”

You kept your voice tranquil and cool. “I called her last week, Dad.”

“Didn’t call to let us know you were in town. Had to find out from that friend of yours, what was her name? The blonde?”

Gosh, did he have to do this now?

“Sorry. I’ll try to give you a better heads-up next time. This case was-”

“Oh, forget the case.” Your Dad rolled his eyes. “It’s always about the cases with you. Are your cases more important than your family?”

You grit your teeth. Fine then, if you were going to do this...

“No more important, I’m sure, then whatever the golden child is up to tonight.” You kept your tone even, but your voice was icy cool.

“Don’t give me that lip young lady! Your brother is a man, doing important work to provide-”

“Provide for who, Dad?” You interrupted, letting some of your frustration through. “He doesn’t have a wife or kids or a girlfriend. He’s certainly not sending money home to you. So tell me, Dad, who is providing for himself such a noble pursuit? Or was the more notable part of that statement that he’s a man? Which means it’s okay that he’s married to his work?”

“You know what? You’re not exactly getting hitched either, so don’t criticize your brother’s relationships. You have no right. And secondly, he’s a man doing good, honest work, and that’s the more notable part. If he’s married to his work right now, so what? He has time.”

“Oh yes, all the time in the world. Me, on the other hand, I should count my days. Sucks to be the oldest, huh? You just waste away before everyone’s eyes.” You sighed dramatically.

“Listen here-”

“Darling, please. We have guests.” Finally, your mother interrupted.

Your Dad gave you a glare that said this wasn’t over but settled back down, going back to his french fries.

The rest of dinner was awkward, to say the least. The conversation never quite returned to what it was, and you were glad when they brought the check. You were also glad when, under the table, Spencer squeezed your hand. A comforting gesture, a moment to say that he was with you, even if he wasn’t about to openly get involved in your family business without your consent. You appreciated that.

You were all more than relieved when the night was over, bidding your parents goodbye and watching them get into their car and drive away. You gave them a final wave as a send-off, despite your Dad only affording you a stormy glare.

JJ broke the silence. “So...your Dad’s kind of sexist, huh?” 

You snorted. “Yeah, something like that. You guys want ice cream? I know an awesome place, and we still have time...”

“Pretty girl, when am I ever going to turn down an ice cream cone?” Derek grinned at you.

“Sweet. Let’s go!”

The rest of the night had a much different tone than the one you’d started with, and you had to admit it. You just might have to thank Spencer Reid for this night after all. He could be a bit of a genius.

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...Until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.”

-Harper Lee

[usashirtstoday]

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[tinsley-goldsworth]

the magic of technology

summary: crowley helps aziraphale figure out how technology works and of course, feelings are involved (Week 6 of my 30 week writing prompt challenge: tech support)

Wc: 1124

read on ao3!

To say that Crowley and Aziraphale had been around for a long time was an understatement. They had been around since the beginning of everything, as in since Adam and Eve were wandering around in the garden. They had been around long enough to have seen and interacted with dinosaurs. They had been around to watch empires built on hope and peace crumble into violence and chaos. They had been around to watch Christopher Columbus “discover” America and watched as the world continued to grow in diversity and experience.

The angel and demon’s purposes were the same: to make sure Armageddon would run smoothly. But while they were watching over Earth, two events happened. The first was that they both grew emotionally attached to Earth and all the stupid little beings it housed. Aziraphale was more obviously attached to all Earthly things but Crowley kept his feelings to himself so he seemed like he didn’t really care much for the Earth.

But when Armageddon began to approach, Crowley realized that he actually quite liked Earth. While Aziraphale was obsessed with sushi and books, Crowley loved the music and popsicles and if Armageddon was going to destroy his favorite objects, Crowley wasn’t so enthusiastic about it anymore.

The second event that occurred while the angel and demon were on the planet was that they both became attached to each other. Not physically, of course, but rather through an unspoken bond that could be considered a friendship, or even more if you looked into it more carefully. Somewhere between all the wars between countries and civilizations built, Crowley and Aziraphale fell in love.

If one of them spoke about his feelings directly, then everything would be easier. They wouldn’t have to make lies about why they were constantly appearing in each other’s lives, even though they didn’t have to, and somehow, they both were oblivious that their passionate love was requited. Somehow, even though they went on many adventures that could be interpreted as dates, they still didn’t confess their love to each other.

Through everything they had been through together, they had never gone through anything as confusing as the creation of the iPhone. When Steve Jobs first introduced the iPhone, everybody knew it would be a big deal but nobody expected it to blow up like it did.

Crowley began seeing more humans walking around with their heads lowered, staring at a rectangular, glowing device in their hands and he decided to look into it. After discovering that these new devices were called “iPhones”, Crowley decided that he wanted to get one for himself to try out and see why everybody loved it so much. So, he got himself an iPhone and Crowley being Crowley, figured out how it worked pretty quickly. And as a result, he also got hooked on playing games like Angry Birds on his phone all day.

One day, Aziraphale and Crowley agreed to meet up at a park bench to discuss Armageddon and because Crowley arrived early, he sat on the park bench, his finger nimbly swiping across the screen as he played Angry Birds. When Aziraphale saw Crowley’s new device, he was confused.

“What on Earth is that?”

Crowley looked up from his game and showed Aziraphale his screen, a questioning look forming on his face. Aziraphale could feel the curiosity burning behind Crowley’s sunglass as Crowley asked, “You’ve never seen an iPhone before?”

“I don’t think so? That looks nothing like a telephone,” Aziraphale commented, sitting down next to Crowley and staring at the iPhone screen as Crowley proceeded to finish the Angry Birds level he was playing.

“It’s called an iPhone. It’s like a telephone without permanent wires and more things. You can call and text people. You can take photos and play games and watch funny videos,” Crowley explained, exiting out of the Angry Birds app to show Aziraphale all the apps he downloaded. “See? All these apps are really useful and entertaining.”

“Hm, that looks interesting. Actually, now that you’ve explained it, I would like to try having one. You’ve tempted me once again.”

Crowley grinned at Azriaphale’s remark and tucked his phone away. “I can help you with that. Meet me here next week and I’ll have one for you.”

And just as Crowley promised, he had gotten an iPhone for Aziraphale by the next week. When Aziraphale walked to the park bench, Crowley handed him his new iPhone and Aziraphale examined the phone in awe. He let out a little yelp of surprise when he pressed the home button, causing the screen to light up and Crowley smiled at the angel’s reaction.

“So, show me how to use this iPhone,” Aziraphale carefully handed the phone over to Crowley, who unlocked it and began showing Aziraphale the features of the iPhone.

First, Crowley showed Aziraphale how to call and added him as Aziraphale’s first contact. Then, he downloaded a few apps on Aziraphale’s phone, specifically YouTube. As Crowley scrolled through the many videos available to watch for free on YouTube, Aziraphale’s eyes went wide with wonder at the gamut of videos available for streaming.

But the biggest discovery was texting. When Crowley went to the messages app, Aziraphale looked confused and asked, “What’s texting?”

“It’s like leaving a written voicemail. You can write messages and have conversations. See, you can send me a text,” Crowley demonstrates by typing a message into Aziraphale’s phone and sending it to his contact before holding up his phone to show that he received the message. Aziraphale seemed mystified by texting and as he held his iPhone, he looked down at it with an expression of amazement, clearly stunned by how much a tiny piece of metal could hold.

Just as Crowley predicted, Aziraphale also got hooked pretty quickly. He was sending multiple texts to Crowley every day and with each message, his typing was more coherent (his first few messages were awkwardly written “hleof chrksilye” and “o mEatn heElio cttolwy”).

Crowley got used to Aziraphale’s good morning and good night messages and somehow managed to fall more in love with the angel than he had before. Then, one fateful day, Aziraphale sent a text after asking Crowley to meet him at the bookshop that read “Thanks! I love you very much <3”.

When Crowley first read the message, his cheeks burned red and he typed back, “Is this some sort of joke?”

He anxiously waited for Aziraphale to text back and Aziraphale replied, “Of course not! I even searched up how to do a heart emoticon for you.”

This caused Crowley to grin like a giant idiot and his cold heart fluttered to life with affection as he answered Aziraphale’s text with, “Good. I love you too <3.”

-

this is my first official good omens fic! this blog will still be bfu-centric but i will occasionally post some good omens fics here :)

[bae-roman]

Get Me

*I ended up just writing this for roman, @ the anon who requested it, if you wanted it for someone else just resend it with the character! 

Leave a “Get Me” in my ask, and I will write a drabble about one character saving another.

Walking home in the middle of a thunderstorm was not how you thought you’d be spending your night, but here you were. You and a friend had planned on going into town to shop but at the last minute, she bailed because she had to work on some group project. Even though you understood, you were still slightly annoyed because not only did you now have to go alone- you had to take the bus. You debated going another day but you knew you wouldn’t have time so you sucked it up, downloaded a schedule app and tried to learn the hemlock grove bus system. You'd only been at the mall for a few hours when it started to rain. Making the stupid decision to try and wait out the worst of the storm resulted in you missing the final bus that would take you to a stop relatively close to your house.

So here you were, 20 minutes into an hour long walk in the rain, and to top it all off, your phone was dead.

The path you were walking on the edge of an empty road, beside a forest. There were barely any street lamps, forcing you to mostly depend on the light of the full moon to guide you home. On any other day living in a town with such a large forest was great, aesthetically at least; but right now it was creepy.

Initially, you were grateful when the rain let up, although, that didn’t last long. Without the sound of water hitting the ground, it was eerily silent.

You quickened your pace, wishing for nothing more than the ability to just teleport yourself home but then came to a halt when you heard a weird noise coming from the woods. After not hearing anything else, you carried on with your journey, chalking the sound up to paranoia when you head it again. Louder this time. It sounded like an animal but also... not? Whatever it was, you just hoped it wouldn’t find you. Walking as fast as you can, you couldn’t help but feel like something was watching you. You tried to shake it off but you couldn’t.

After a few minutes of no more noises, you began to feel better and even laughed at how silly you were being.

A bit after that, the rain had picked up again, and now it was even more intense than before. You could barely see anything in front of you, and the thunder was so loud when it rumbled you could almost feel the earth move beneath you.

You looked around you, trying to see if there was a phone booth -  anything that could protect you from the rain. That’s when you saw...it. It was massive and white and chilled you to your core. You’d heard about what had happened at Kilderberry park last month but after 4 weeks of no other attacks, everyone assumed that the animal responsible had either died or left the area. Well, everyone was wrong. Logically, you didn’t actually know that this was the creature responsible for what had happened but you knew. You felt it somehow, in your gut. As far as you could tell it hadn’t seen you yet, for if it did, you’d be dead already. Relying on the deafening sound of the rain to cloak your presence you waited for the next rumble of thunder and bolted behind a tree for cover. When the creature turned it’s head to where you had previously been standing- you were already gone. You watched from hour hiding place while the wolf let out a bone-chilling howl and ran off deeper into the woods.

You collected yourself and decided that your best bet was to get as far away from here as possible so you started to sprint as fast as you could, in the opposite direction from where your house was, praying that the wolf had gone off in the other direction. You were so scared that you didn’t even notice the headlights of a car coming up behind you until it stopped a bit ahead of you.

‘Great’ you thought, ‘Just what I need right now, some creep to deal with’.

Knowing that there was no way in hell you were turning around, you carefully walked in the direction of the car.

Once you were closer and could actually make out the vehicle, your anxiety slightly let up. It was the one car in town everybody could recognize. It was Roman Godfrey’s.

You knew Roman in the same way everybody in Hemlock Grove did. He was in your grade so you’d been in a few of the same classes since you were kids and you had talked occasionally but nothing substantial.

“Hey” he called out when he recognized it was you. You waved and approached the driver’s side of the car.

“Pretty fucked night to go out for a run, don’t you think? He asked.

Before you could respond, you noticed him squinting at something past you.  You turned your head to see what had captured his focus and felt your whole body stiffen. It was the wolf, and this time it was staring right at you.“Get in the car” Roman said sternly. Before you even knew what you were doing, you had run to the passenger side, diving into the vehicle as fast as you could. Roman didn’t even wait for you to fully shut your door before flooring it. You could see the wolf running after the car, but it couldn’t keep up.  

Neither of you said anything until you were sure it was gone. Roman slowed down so that he was only going 20 miles over the speed limit and looked over at you.

“You ok?” He asked. “I think so” you replied, unconfidently. You continued to tell him about how you had had to hide from it before he showed up. “Shee-it,” he said seriously and then asked for your address.

You didn’t speak much as he drove you home, still processing what had just happened. Though, you did apologize for the mess you were making in his car from being caught in the rain for so long.

When he pulled up into your driveway, you thanked him for the ride and told him to get home safe. He watched you get to the door before speeding off.  

Your parents had gone to some business dinner in the city and thankfully weren’t home yet. The pair of them would’ve had a complete fit if they found out what had happened tonight. Thankful to finally be home and safe you took a well-deserved shower and went straight to bed.

When you woke up the next morning, something just felt wrong. Once you checked your phone, you found out why. A girl had been killed last night. No, killed wasn’t the right word, massacred was apter. The news said that the poor girl had had part of her body eaten alive by some animal, but you knew what animal it was exactly. That news in and of itself was enough to make you sick but your heart dropped as you gather more information.

She had been found right around where you were before Roman had picked you up.

Getting ready for school and breakfast with your parents was a blur. You were completely zoned out to everything going on around you.

When you walked into school, you didn’t really know what to do; you didn’t have it in you to sit through a class right now. You felt guilty; you knew you should be thankful that you were alive and that your legs were still attached to your fully functioning body but you felt so messed up. You didn’t want to tell your friends and make it all about you, but you needed to say something to someone.

Not really paying attention to where you were going, you spotted Roman leaning against his locker, completely engrossed in his phone. He didn’t even notice you coming towards him until you greeted him.

“Hey,” you said, causing him to look up from his phone.

“Hey”

“Uhm.. last night... Did you hear the news?” Roman nodded and scanned her over. She looked nervous, though most girls were nervous around him.

“It happened right where you..where we...I mean that could’ve been me...I” You trailed off, unsure of what you were even trying to say.

Roman looked at you quizzically as you took a deep breath before speaking up again “You saved me”.  you said seriously. He just shrugged his shoulders and put his hands in his pockets “No problem”.

“No really Roman, I - it’s... I’d be dead right now if it wasn’t for you ..”

Before you could continue your babbling, Roman stood up from his locker to tower over you.

“You look like you need to smoke” he pointed out.  

You reflexively scrunched up your face at the memory of the one time you tried a cigarette and how much you’d hated it.

“Cigarettes aren’t really my thing”

He leant down so his face was only a few inches from yours

“I didn’t mean a cigarette” he winked.

You didn’t partake in marijuana that often, but you figured you deserved some relaxation after the past 24 hours.

“Oh ok sure. But where-”

“I have a spot” he interrupted and started walking.

You followed close behind, trying to keep up with his long strides.

He led you the outdoor stairwell that was near the football field and took a seat on one of the cement steps while he lit up. When you had finished, he threw away the roach and asked you if you felt any better. You smiled at him. “A bit actually, thanks”. Roman nodded his head and lit up a cigarette, being careful to blow the smoke away from you. Instead of attempting to make conversation, you just admired the side profile of his face from where you were sitting beside him. ‘He really is pretty’ you thought to yourself.

After a few moments of silence, Roman turned his head towards you, catching you staring at him. Knowing there was no point in trying to deny ogling his perfect face, you just bit your lip and bashfully looked away. He smirked and shuffled closer towards you. “You know,” he whispered “I know something we could do that would make you feel much better...” as he snaked his fingers up your thigh...

Also from this prompt list: 

Remember Me

[rainy-rose]

10 Questions

I was tagged by @burningemberjade. Thank you very much ^^

I had to think a bit for some of the answers :))

1. Last book you read and your opinion on it.

I just finished the first installment of Artemis Fowl  by Eoin Colfer. Since I took a break from it for almost a year, I can only state my opinion about the last 70 pages or so. It was okay, an easy read, I remember reading quite a lot of it on a 2 hour train ride. Although some of the characters and the way they handled things was a bit iffy, I quite like it and I think I will continue with the series. I am actually looking it up now to download it :)).

2. Next book on your reading list.

*goes to the shelf and grabs book* As a physical read it’s Daughter of Smoke and Bone by Laini Taylor, as for ebooks... I think I will give Atlas Shrugged a chance. I should probably get through A song of Ice and fire as well, but ughhhh, don’t really want to 

3. Favorite novel of all time.

Since last spring Watership Down has that status. That and Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban

4. Current favorite song.

The Eagle Flies Alone by Arch Enemy. I had this on repeat for days :))

5. Favorite song of all time.

It’s a tie between Filrth in the Beauty and Taion, both by The Gazette. I don’t have a particular reason for Filth, Taion on the other hand has such a sad backstory T_T 

6. What inspired you to become a writer? If you’re not a writer, what are your career goals and aspirations?

I used to write in high school, but not at the level of calling myself a writer. However, being one is kind of my dream career. Maybe someday I will start writing again because I miss it and I still get moments when I want to write of random and unrelated plot ideas.

7. Favorite color?

Purpleeee. One of my classmates has started calling me “purple” because most of my winter clothes, coat included, are purple :))

8. What helps you de-stress?

Depends on where I am when the stress kicks in, but I usually listen to music, or rant to my best friend. Sometimes even scrolling through tumblr helps.

9. Tell me a story about you that you feel sums up your personality pretty well.

I had to think a bit about this one, but something I have noticed recently about my personality is that I get extremely annoyed when people waste time and can’t make a decision and also, that I want to avoid spending time with acquaintances. Unfortunately, some times the 2 kind of clash which leads to the following moment of “why the fuck did I not keep my mouth shut!”

So, my best friend (Delia )and I were at the Botanical Garden for an event and we meet some of my former B.A classmates and her current M.A classmates. Both me and Delia are not particularly fond of these people so, we went our own way and meet with them here and there, but did not spend that much time with them, while at the event. That is until one of them called her to tell her that they were about to leave, so we got to the gate and met with them. The discussion of “let’s find a place to eat” arose, Delia and I had already spoken about that, so we were not offering much input, since we did not want to go with them. Buuuuut, cue them arguing and insisting upon different places, but at the same not making a decision and constantly pushing forward the idea that we had to find a place that could accommodate everybody’s eating habits [ both me and Delia are vegans, and there are not that many places for us in Bucharest, places that are acceptable price wise]. While they were talking, we were trying to figure out how to tell them that we had no intention of coming, without it being obvious that we did not want to spend anymore time with them. That did not work well... I got annoyed at the whole situation and opposed to my usually quiet and calm demeanor got quite bossy and told them to just choose already cause we can eat some grilled veggies and fries and we will be fine. Discussion ceased pretty soon and the place was decided, buut now we could not get away from them so we had to join them cause I opened my mouth and made a firm point. Needless to say, it was not enjoyable and I ended up spending more money than I wanted to, kept conversations to a minimum, usually with Delia or answering here and there when I was asked something... not fun! The food was good, but I finished fast cause 1. I was hungry and 2. I had no interest for the discussions that were going on.

Oh, and the worst part... the table we sat at was next to a table at which 3 children and their families were... I do not like kids... at all, especially when they are small. I perfected my glare on them!

Phew... that was longer than intended :)) but I am not good at talking about myself, but yeah, those are some of my not so pleasant traits :)). I am not as horrible/weird as I made it sound, I promise :)) 

10. If an elf randomly showed up on your doorstep and asked you to go adventuring, would you? Why or why not?

Ohhh, yesss. I might have like a list of questions about what the adventures will consist of, but yes is definitely an answer. As for why... well, my life is pretty boring, and a chance to adventure is always welcome, especially if it consists of a fantastical creature and possibly magic. Sing me up! Top o the list! right here~

All right, so I am better at answering questions than asking them, but here goes nothing!

1. What is your favorite book genre and why?

2. Books/manga/graphic novels adapted into a movie or a tv series?

3. If you could choose 3 characters to go on an adventure with, who would they be?

4. What is your favorite animal and why?

5. What were your career goals when you were little? Did you reach them?

6. What was the first concert you went to and how old where you?

7. How long have you known your closest friend?

8. Watching movies at the cinema or at home?

9. Are you an organized person?

10. What is your drink of choice? Both alcoholic and non-alcoholic

I’ll taaaaaggg *goes to her dash cause she has no clue* @boop-your-snoot, @bibliophilicwitch, @bookcub, @wot-tidbits, @anassarhenisch. Only if you want to/feel comfortable ^_^