#thank u haz for tagging me !!

[blossoms-and-possums]

let your spotify predict your 2024! shuffle your on repeat playlist and the first twelve songs represent your 2024!

ty to my favourite rat @sequinhaze for tagging me 💛

january: 4 minutes (gcv)

february: now that we don’t talk (taylor swift)

march: one of your girls (troye sivan)

april: night shift (lucy dacus)

may: im the greatest star (gcv, khv)

june: is it over now? (taylor swift)

july: bad romance (gcv)

august: therapy (budjerah)

september: wasabi (little mix)

october: my love mine all mine (mitski)

november: feather (sabrina carpenter)

december: red solo cup (gcv)

tagging (no pressure!) @lavenderhaze @mandycantdecide @pretentiouswreckingball @anauro and anyone else who wants to do this :)

[forhyune]

my reaction to this information:

‧ ❆ ˚ everything has changed (besides myself)・l.f.

— you spend three years loving him, six months losing him, and four hours waiting for him to get the hell out of your house. but the human heart is more stubborn than you know.

words・5.4k

pairing・lee felix x gn!reader

genres・babysitter!au, girldad!lix, nobody look at me, toothrotting fluff, more angst than originally intended tbh, exes to lovers, hurt/comfort, happy ending yayyy, non-linear storyline

warnings・cousin has a korean name and experiences one (1) minor head bump, mc is temporarily heartbroken and experiences one (1) breakdown

playlist・house song by searows・glad by tori kelly・let's pretend by del water gap・you were good to me by jeremy zucker

a/n・hiiii my loves, i'm so unbelievably excited to bring u my first contribution to my and @astraystayyh's collaboration, "winter falls" ♡ every time i write for our ray of sunshine i'm reminded of how thankful i am to love him. this fic ruined me. hope it does the same to you (smile)

I. everything

“One day,” you muttered to the toddler sitting on your shoulders, “you’ll experience something deeply, irreversibly humbling, and I’ll be there to witness your downfall.”

Byeol responded to this with an unbothered babble. She then gathered two handfuls of your hair and yanked using far too much force to be biologically possible.

You folded like a lawn chair. “Mother—!”

Oh, that word was not suitable for button-sized ears.

“—oh, my dear mother, why? Why me?”

Technically speaking, your aunt should’ve been the target of your lamentations, but all she did was produce the child presently steering you around the kitchen like you were her own personal bumper car. Your own mother was the one who volunteered you to watch said child during the first weekend of your winter break. Only for an hour until the babysitter arrives, she’d said (raising her voice, so as to be heard over your groaning).

You adored Byeol. She made scarily accurate chipmunk sounds and possessed an immobilizing fear of grapes. She bust out a dance move before she took her first steps. The girl could have you floored with laughter without being able to say more than three words at a time. Still, this was far from how you imagined onsetting your desperately-needed few weeks off. Not to mention it was now half past three; your shift should’ve ended two minutes ago.

As if on cue, the doorbell rang. Byeol emitted an excited onomatopoeia like a golden retriever detecting the mailman. Your reaction wasn’t too far off; you swiveled your head in the sound’s direction, sang out “coming!” in a delighted vibrato, and twirled into the foyer, your hands around Byeol’s ankles anchoring her in place.

You cracked open the door and found yourself face-to-face with Byeol’s babysitter. The freckles scattered across his high cheekbones and sloping nose seemed to you like they were imprinted by the sun itself. His hair was dark, falling just shy of pitch black, and long, ending an inch or so below pierced ears. A few misbehaving strands rested over his forehead but did little to obstruct your view of his eyes: profoundly brown and pointed at either end, like poinsettia petals.

He was the most beautiful man you’d ever seen. You felt your skin warm, your heart flip. You opened your mouth. 

Then Byeol hit her head against the vertical edge of the front door, loud enough for it to echo.

The panic that seized you in that moment was truly unlike anything you’d experienced before. You caught one glimpse of the stranger’s expression (as mortified as you expected), and then you were seeing your own epitaph on the inside of your eyelids, engraved with the four words “Death by Furious Aunt.”

“Was that—?” The man sputtered, and his voice was rich and full and accented and just as breathtaking as the rest of him and holy fucking shit now was not the time.

“My fucking god,” you whispered, completely forgetting to watch your mouth. In a hurry, you swung Byeol off your shoulders and dropped to a knee. You leaned in close to examine her reddening forehead and cradled the plush of her cheek; she blinked at you a few times, fascinated by the sudden sight of your face again.

“You okay, Byeollie? That hurt a lot, didn’t it? I’m so, so sorr—”

Byeol started to laugh.

Not laugh as in those little chuckles she let out randomly, like there was something inherently amusing about the kitchen cupboard, but laugh as in a boisterous, resounding guffaw, like a great-uncle at a family gathering off one too many martinis.

This rendered you speechless for the second time in under a minute. Then, you lifted your other hand to cradle her other cheek, her face now sandwiched between your palms, and squeezed.

“I broke my cousin,” you whispered, your voice was so deathly serious that the man in the doorway had to stifle a laugh of his own.

His knee brushed against your shin as he sat down to your left, folding his legs into a criss-cross. You could discern notes of lavender and orange blossoms in the delicate cologne that clung to him, perforated the air and your mind both.

“Can I?” He asked.

“Please.”

Carefully, you shifted Byeol’s small frame towards him; the manner in which he accepted her was so smooth and practiced that there was no doubt in your mind you were watching a professional at work. He settled her on his right knee, then dipped his head to look her in the eye.

“Hi, princess,” he cooed with a dulcet smile. He curved his pointer finger, dusted it beneath her chin. “Why are you laughing, silly girl?”

Oh.

Oh.

You might just continue your lineage after all.

“Y/N-ie,” she answered, still tittering.

He looked to you with a slight tilt to his head, and you nodded affirmatively. He murmured a quiet ah. “What about Y/N-ie?”

Somehow you sensed that she was about to embarrass you and pinched the bridge of your nose—in preparation.

“P-pretty.” I knew it!

The man let out the laugh he’d been holding back since earlier and tapped on her button nose, lowered his voice to a whisper that he knew you could hear.

“I agree.” His eye glinted playfully, matching his tone. “And so are you.” The bashful, high-pitched giggle she responded with sounded eerily similar to your inner monologue.

The two of you spent a little longer on the floor of the foyer making sure Byeol was okay, and then the girl upped and made a mad dash for the kitchen while yelling something about a horse, and if that didn’t confirm that she was completely fine (albeit incredibly strange) you didn’t know what would. You found her rolling around the carpet in the room adjacent to the kitchen and left her to her own devices while you and her babysitter fixed up a small fruit plate for her afternoon snack. No grapes, of course.

He told you he usually went by Felix, but that his Korean name was probably easier for Byeol to pronounce, with its easier consonants and whatnot. You asked which name he preferred, and he said either or. He was a recent college graduate, a year older than you, who was determined to spend at least the next two years doing nothing but working out his future. He accepted the part-time babysitting position to pick up some light cash in the process.

“And ‘cause I’m good with kids,” he added, splitting apart a tangerine. “So I’ve been told.”

“Oh, you definitely are,” you said, plating a couple blueberries. “You melted her earlier.”

“She melted me. She’s so cute. And you’re so cute with her—I didn’t realize I was robbing someone of their job.”

You turned your head to regard the tot and let out a helpless laugh. Byeol tired of being a human lint roller a few minutes ago and had since moved on to staring aimlessly out the window.

“She doesn’t take me seriously, and I can’t stay mad at her,” you mused. “I would be a nightmare as her babysitter, trust me. She’s all yours.”

Felix held out two overturned handfuls of tangerine slices, to which you quickly moved the platter across the counter. He didn’t respond to your comments as he placed them on the outermost edge so that they looked like rays of sun emanating from a multicolored core. Adorable.

“Will you be around much, then?”

You made eye contact with him across the counter. On his perfect face was a teasing smirk and a subtle blush. Ah, you’d been mistaken, writing off his silence as concentration—he’d been contemplating how to best flirt with you.

“Y’know. In case I need any help teaching her cuss words,” he appended.

It was then your turn to flush a couple shades darker. “Please don’t tell her mom.”

“I won’t, I won’t.” He walked around the perimeter of the counter until he was directly in front of you; the lavender and orange blossoms returned. “On one condition.”

Not even one hour on the job and he was already trying to blackmail you? You respected it. “Which is?”

As he shifted some of his weight onto the counter, something too shifted in his smile, giving it a quality that was every bit as hopeful as it was gentle.

It was then, while Lee Felix was looking at you like that, all dilated pupils and long lashes, when you predicted that he would one day break your heart. You predicted you’d let him.

“Be around,” he said simply.

It wasn’t a question or a demand. In hindsight, you think it was more akin to a birthday wish, ill-fated the moment it hit the air.

II. has changed

Felix pulled Byeol’s hood up and over her ears, and you realized he was right about the winter coat getting too small for her—she looked like a bowling pin. You muffled your snort into your scarf.

“And what was the last rule again?” He asked, his breath puffing into the frigid afternoon in tiny clouds. Byeol sighed like she knew anything of the world’s woes.

“No barking at other kids,” came the sad reply, but a toothy smile spread across her face anyways when Felix nudged the underside of her chin. She loved when he did that.

“That’s my girl,” he hummed. “I believe in you.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” you said, and the wounded look Felix shot you was like you’d just confessed to hating kittens. “Come on—she doesn’t have a good track record. I’m allowed to have my doubts.”

“I dunno what that means,” Byeol announced with admirable frankness, and then turned around and scurried down the porch stairs, scattering fun-sized footprints across the snowy streets.

As you braced yourself to follow her, Felix stopped you with a slip of his hand into the pocket of your puffer. His fingers first aligned with yours inside the insulated nylon, then chased the spaces in between. He leaned in close, placed a kiss on the apple of your cheek, another on the corner of your mouth. This brought a helpless smile to your face, too. He had a way of melting you and Byeol both.

“It’ll be fine,” he soothed. “A little barking never hurt anybody, baby.”

“Lix, last time somebody called animal control.”

“Ermm—a little barking never hurt most people.”

That winter, Byeol was four, and your relationship with Felix was about to turn two.

Funnily enough, you’d never figured out when your anniversary actually was. Felix wagered it was the day you met, as he knew he loved you the instant he saw you; you insisted it was months later, since it took both of you an entire summer vacation of open-ended flirting and informal dating to label yourselves for real. Imagine your horror when he showed up outside your college apartment the day before your graduation, arms overflowing with flowers and gift bags brimming with your favorite things, the phrase “happy anniversary” on his lips three months before you perceived it to be. You’ve celebrated both days ever since.

You loved the ocean growing up. You didn’t get to visit it often, but when you did you would run up to the water’s very edge so that your toes dipped into the cold—and just stand there, observing, absorbing, until even the seam of your lips and the ends of your eyelashes were studded with crystals of seasalt. You found endless tranquility in its rhythmic whispers and unspeakable comfort in its oscillating waves, guaranteed to return after momentary departure.

Your fascination stemmed from the folktale your mother used to read to you before bed, about a sun goddess creating the earth. In the story, every component of nature was one of the sun’s beloved children. She allegedly loved them all, but you suspected the ocean was her favorite; it was obvious, the way she twinkled off its ebbing surface, the way every minuscule spot of light looked to you like a handprint of hers, left behind by eons of endless doting.

Felix reminded you of the ocean. Every day you grew more certain that you wanted to drown in him, to let his resonant voice and kind eyes sweep and keep you inside his depths. It was never salt that he pressed into your skin but warmth, stamped and sealed with caring hands and cautious lips. His deep whispers promised eternal love and temporary ecstasy and everything in between. You knew he would come back to you even if stranded in a different realm. And there was no questioning the goddess’ favoritism, either. The freckles on his face mirrored the sun’s very spots like an homage to his creator.

You didn’t love the ocean growing up, no. You had never loved before Felix.

The park was busy when the three of you arrived. Byeol and Felix recognized a few families as your aunt’s neighbors and hurried over to say hello. Your social butterflies. 

“I’ll be over there,” you called after them.

Felix stopped in his tracks, looked over his shoulder. It had started snowing lightly on your walk there, and snowflakes now sat atop his sable locks. He looked like a painting. “You okay?”

“Yes, yes.” You shooed them off. “Don’t worry about me. Go have fun.” 

With that, you withdrew to the sidelines, an unoccupied swingset adjacent to a baseball diamond covered in frost. 

Your baby cousin was brawny for her age, which you could’ve seen coming with how she was hauling at your hair two years ago, but even she couldn’t yet terrorize the playground without assistance. Who better to make her partner in crime than her favorite Bokkie? You couldn’t help but giggle as the two revolved around each other for the better part of an hour, Byeol’s smile colossal as she frolicked every which way, Felix’s smile worried but hopelessly endeared as he followed behind. He never let her leave his shadow. She never tried to.

It always did something to you, seeing how good Felix was with Byeol, how good he was to her. But it was there on those icy swings that you experienced a moment of strange clarity, like you’d broken the fourth wall of your own story. You could feel the winds of change blowing your hair across your shoulders. You were aware of time’s trickling from the gaps of your fingers like liquid mercury.

Your laughter dissipated to a bittersweet smile; your smile mellowed to dewy eyes. It seemed like just yesterday when Byeol was small enough to sit on your shoulders and Felix stepped into your kitchen for the first time. Now, she was scaling a rope ladder with the celerity of a crazed monkey while Felix hovered a wary hand by her waist. The muted sunlight caught on the silver rings he wore, particularly the thin, bright one on his middle finger. You had one just like it, adorning the same place. 

The last two years were the happiest of your life. Why couldn’t you remember where they went?

Lavender and orange blossoms announced your boyfriend’s arrival—that, and the sigh of fatigue that he expelled as he dropped into the swing next to you.

“I’m not cut out for this anymore.”

Byeol’s neighbor had temporarily relieved Felix of his post by taking her and his son to test out the seesaw, and you wouldn’t be surprised if the whole town could hear her enthusiastic shrieking.

“You know how people walk their dogs?” You mused. “Some dogs walk their people. She’s one of them.”

For a moment, he could only stare in disbelief at the grin creeping across your face; then, he groaned in a way that could only mean you were right on the money. You gave his thigh a sympathetic pat.

“You’re whipped, my love. It’s okay.”

“Maybe a little,” he admitted, suddenly perking up. “Hey, no barking though.”

“Are we considering that a win nowadays?”

“Do you see animal control anywhere?”

“Good point.”

Felix monitored your expression during the quiet interval that ensued—saw through the melancholy curve of your lips, the pensive slant of your gaze. There was a red tinge to the whites of your eyes that hadn’t been there before.

You saw him reach for you in your periphery. His fingers brushed a lock of hair behind the shell of your ear, remained there for three slow heartbeats, and then lifted away.

“Angel,” he murmured. “Talk to me.”

You shook your head. “It’s silly.”

“It’s not.” Not even ten seconds after the last time, he reached for you again, now to take your hand and bring it to his lap. “You know it’s not.”

“It’s just that—”

Felix thumbed over the ridges of your knuckles, his touch so gentle that it could’ve unraveled a chrysalis; it certainly unraveled you. You took a stabilizing breath.

“I wish could recognize my own happiness in the moment,” you sighed, “not just in retrospect. That way, even when it comes to an end, I’d still be able to look back and say with confidence that I was happy once. I’d like that, I think.”

His brows knit together as he processed your words, and, the next thing you knew, he left his swing trembling in his sudden absence and his trenchcoat became a black blur in the cold air.

Felix rested his elbows atop your knees as he knelt in front of you, cradled your face in his hands. He was achingly beautiful always, but you truly felt your breath swiped from your lungs at the new proximity of his ethereal features: petal-shaped eyes, wind-bitten cheeks, coral cupid’s bow. A painting.

“That’s easy enough,” Felix hummed. “How do you feel right now?”

You had zero agency in the smile this brought to your face. You wrapped your hands around his wrists, your answer quick, thoughtless. “Happy.”

He pressed his lips to the space between your eyes. “And now?”

“Happier.”

He pressed his lips to the curve of your jaw. “What about now?” 

“Even happier.”

His gaze flickered to his final destination, but you beat him to it, sealing your mouth against his with urgency. The kiss that followed was so intensely loving that your head went fuzzy. How was it that you felt his adoration for you even in his pliant lips, his velvet tongue? You ran your fingers through the part of his hair. You loved when you could feel the locks flutter back into place afterwards.

“GET A ROOM!”

You and Felix pulled away from one another, wearing matching expressions of bewilderment. Byeol was approximately five Newtons away from soaring off into the stratosphere, her legs jostling around as she clung to her seat for dear life. It seemed your neighbor had a very aggressive way of seesaw-maneuvering. It seemed your cousin had a very aggressive vocabulary.

“Where did she learn—?” The two of you began in unison, then shot your heads back towards each other.

“It had to be you.”

“Outrageous—you’re the Australian here!”

“You cuss like one too!”

“Because of you!”

“So we’re just lying now?”

“Well, yes.”

Felix cracked a smile—and then the two of you were dying of laughter, his right eye squinting closed and your forehead thudding onto his shoulder. You hardly managed to get out your next words. “We have to do something about her vernacular, don’t we?”

“Oh, badly,” he replied. “Badly.”

After you expended your giggles, you nuzzled into the crook of his neck, blissful, glowing. “Thank you, baby.”

“What for?”

“Being my happiness.”

He angled your face back to his and kissed you once more, whispering I love you like it wasn’t enough that it graced your ears; he needed it embossed upon your flesh in permanent ink.

Your intermingled breaths floated up into the air like flare signals over a capsizing boat. Here marks the time we were happiest.

III. (besides myself)

He’s blonde.

That’s the first thing you notice when you see your ex-boyfriend on your aunt’s porch: the slightly off-white color of his silky tresses, grown out longer than you’ve ever seen, pushed off his forehead and tucked behind his ears.

It’s not the only thing you notice, of course. His face has thinned ever so slightly, the shadows thrown over his features by the streetlights behind him particularly opaque. His outfit is glorious, expensive, with the black blazer and white dress shirt, the top two buttons undone, the pendant of a silver necklace resting between toned collarbones. His hands are almost overflowing with what must be gifts for your family. It’s impossible to discern all of them from this distance, but you know the bouquet of white poinsettias is for your mom, the batch of brownies doused in sprinkles and icing for Byeol.

But the hair is where your gaze returns, because tucked among the platinum strands are black roots: millimeters of the color you grew to adore, peeking out as if trying to catch a glimpse of you, too.

You’re so occupied with this game of “I spy” that you don’t notice the rampant footsteps coming up behind you. Your six-year-old cousin collides with the back of your leg head-on and nearly topples you like a bowling pin.

“Is it him?” She asks breathlessly.

You come this close to berating her as you steady yourself against the wall��what did I say about treating human beings like couch cushions? But you look down to see her chin resting on the side of your thigh, her eager eyes shining so brightly that she puts her own namesake to shame. Your scolding tirade dissolves on your tongue like popping candy.

You simply sigh instead. “Yes, but—”

“BOKKIE!” She shrieks, and Felix’s head snap upwards at the sound of her voice. His tender smile melts some of the frost laminating your heart.

You crack open the door, making eye contact with Felix for the first time in six months.

“Put everything down. Quickly,” you whisper, and he obeys right away, alarmed by the urgency in your voice. A wise choice.

The last present has hardly touched down upon the wooden planks when Byeol wriggles through the doorway and charges towards Felix like an angered toro. He swivels at her bright holler of his name, lowers himself to a squat just barely in time to catch her in his embrace. The delighted laugh that leaves his mouth as he staggers backwards sounds like the sun itself; you feel lost in orbit hearing it again.

“Bokkie,” Byeol murmurs, her voice muffled in the dip of his shoulder, by the tightening of her arms around his neck.

“Hi, princess.” He kisses her temple, presses his nose against her hair. “Whoa, you’ve grown strong, haven’t you?”

“She takes taekwondo classes now,” you hum from above, and the shock in his face asks the very question that your poignant smile confirms. Yes, because of you.

Felix pulls away, cocoons her cheeks with cherishing hands. “Is that true?”

She bobs her head. “I want to be like Bokkie.”

And his eyes go impossibly, terribly soft, like he’s gazing at the horizon itself. The sight twists the knife in your gut and yanks on your tangled heartstrings. It’s all because of you.

“And kick some ass!” Byeol adds, knocking you out of your sentimental spiral. You clap a defeated hand to your forehead. Felix falls over himself. So much for fixing her vernacular.

A few minutes later, Byeol is pirouetting towards the kitchen with a couple of Felix’s smaller presents in her arms, all too happy to be of help. You linger behind as Felix takes off his shoes, your cousin’s departure leaving the two of you alone in the dim foyer.

Felix straightens. The two of you come face to face. The air hangs so heavily with unspoken words that you half expect it to start dripping.

“Hi,” he says.

You nearly laugh at the cruelty of it. The man you were certain you’d grow old with greeting you like you’ve been forced to sit next to each other on the first day of school.

“Hi,” you answer. “You look—”

The two of you say this last part in unison; old habits die hard.

“—nice,” you finish.

“—beautiful,” Felix breathes, his eyes flicking off to the side abashedly.

Your throat constricts, pulse quickens. Says you. If he was a painting before, you think he’s a sculpture now, his perfection as tangible as if hand-chiseled by the greatest artists of old. As clear as the sun’s beloved sea. You can’t tell if it’s his stylist’s doing or simply a product of him growing into himself.

“Thank you,” you reply quietly. “And thank you for coming.”

“Thank you for inviting me. I didn’t think you would.”

“I didn’t do it for me.”

No part of you wants to see the subtle wince that crosses his face at your statement, so you turn your gaze to his jewelry-laden hands instead. 

For a split second, you swear you see the same promise ring settled in the same place on his middle finger. You realize what you’re really looking at only after blinking the phosphenes from your eyes: the thin tanline that it left behind. The realization fixes and destroys you all at once.

Then, Byeol starts wailing about Felix’s whereabouts like an actress hired to spare you from this very interaction.

“Her Highness beckons.” The smile you manage feels like drying cement. “Shall we?”

On your way to the kitchen, you notice the cologne emanating from his person smells only of citrus—no lavender. Its absence steadies you, deludes you into believing that it’s a stranger you’ve just let inside.

That illusion lasts for exactly three hours and forty-eight minutes.

It’s clear that the breakup has your family walking on eggshells, but it’s even clearer that their adoration for Felix has never wavered. You’ve never resigned yourself to the restroom so many times in one night, only to stand with your back against the door, unmoving, unfeeling, listening to the low thrum of his voice through the mahogany. Chatting comfortably with your aunt, bursting into laughter with Byeol, reminding you of the time you considered him family too. 

With every glance you toss your reflection, you discover new cracks in your composure. Has he noticed them yet?

After you come out of the restroom for the sixth time, you notice a light spilling from Byeol’s bedroom into the hallway. A low Australian accent graces your ears, followed closely by a tinkling giggle, and your body nudges you towards the sounds before your head can intervene.

You give your cousin’s door a feather-light nudge. It opens a few centimeters more and grants you vision of Byeol tucked into bed, Felix knelt at her side. Both of their faces are illuminated by the flaxen light of the nearby lamp.

Felix brushes her choppy bangs out of her eyes, a teasing smile on his lips. “Can I tell you a secret, princess?”

This wrests from her another fluttering laugh; you swear he’s the only person in the whole world who makes her shy. “Sure!”

“Promise you won’t tell anyone?”

“Promise.”

“Not even Snernard.”

“M’kay.”

“Or Bong.”

“M’kay.”

“Especially not Trash the chicken. I don’t trust him.”

“I know, I know, I won’t!” Byeol huffs, and Felix laughs at her outburst. You also snort into your sleeve, amused (and deeply perplexed) by your cousin’s plushie-naming conventions.

“Thank you,” he hums, and he lowers his voice enough that you don’t catch the next thing he says.

All you perceive is the way that Byeol reacts. She sits up straight in bed, resting her back against her pillow. Her features rearrange themselves slowly, awfully, like the spread of cherry-flavored cough syrup over one’s sore throat, into the furthest thing from her trademark too-big-for-her-face smile.

Your stomach plummets to your fucking ankle.

“Why?” Her voice sounds microscopic.

“Well, do you remember what Bokkie’s dream job is?”

Byeol considers for a moment. “Being a singer?”

“That’s right.” He runs a knuckle over the hill of her cheek, the action achingly familiar, immensely fond. “And I found a place where I can do that, but it’s very, very far away. I won’t be able to come home very often.”

The telltale signs appear as he speaks; the final word sets them into motion. A tear streaks down the side of Byeol’s face. It hardly leaves the corner of her eye before it’s being intercepted by a doting swipe of his thumb.

“No,” she replies.

“You've grown so much.” Another tear falls. He wipes away that one, too. “You’re growing so well.”

“No,” she repeats.

“You’ve stolen the light of every star in the sky already. The whole galaxy will be yours someday, sweetheart. I know it.”

“I don’t want it,” she whispers. “I want my Bokkie.”

His vision starts to blur also. “But you don’t need me anymore.”

“We do.”

You know the precise moment Felix’s heart pauses in his chest because it is when yours does too.

“We?” He repeats, and she nods.

“Your dream job is being a singer.” Now Byeol is the one to reach for Felix, her delicate hand cupping the curve of his cheek. Her fingers are too small to catch his tears, she tries anyways—

“But what is your dream?”

It becomes too much for you.

You turn around. A choked sob escapes from behind the hand you have sealed to your mouth, causing both heads inside Byeol’s room to whirl in your direction. You don’t care that you nearly break both of your ankles beelining up the stairs; you only care to get the fuck out of that hallway.

You topple into your room, close the door behind you, and crumble.

Your quivering hands find purchase around your folded legs; your eyes squeeze shut against your knees. Rivulets of tears cascade over your shuddering lips like ruptured barrels of wine, left in the cellars of your soul to age, to spoil.

You never wanted your grief to see the light of day. Pouring your regret over every sidewalk wouldn’t change the past. Splashing your heartache across every wall like the world’s most fucked-up mural wouldn’t alleviate the pain of losing him. He was the one who left, but were the one who’d asked him to. Feeling, yearning, mourning. Those always seemed so futile.

But you’re not just crying in this moment, rocking back and forth on your bedroom floor; you’re bleeding, the wounds you never treated igniting all at once as if exposed to vinegar, leaving you writhing and gasping in their wake. How you wish they’d been able to heal sooner. Maybe then seeing Felix tonight wouldn’t have splintered your soul like dropped porcelain.

Your door clicks open. Your breath hitches in your throat with a quiet scratch. The gulp of oxygen you intake tastes of oranges.

Every night before you fall asleep, you still think of the last time you visited the sea. The cool sand chafing against your toes, the coarse winds slapping your hair against your face hard enough to sting. The weather was terrible (you neglected to check the forecast before making the drive), but when you stepped onto the embittered coastline, you took what felt like the first real breath of your young adulthood. The fog melded to your skin as if melting a blindfold away, showing you the world in its entirety.

You return to that beach when Felix pulls you into his chest, and there’s no fog this time. Just the faint smell of lavender and your ocean, guaranteed to return after momentary departure.

Feverishly, Felix presses his lips to your temple, the apple of your cheek, rests his forehead against yours. Brokenly, he utters, “it’s you.”

You can feel his shaking in every part of him: the tickling breath, the fluttering eyelashes, the unsteady hand that reaches into the pocket of his blazer. You graze your fingers over his jaw, an attempt to steady his careening heart, only to lose yours in the fray also when he produces a small red box of unmistakable dimensions.

“God, it’s you. It always has been, always will be. Anything can change except for this.” His voice disintegrates as he speaks. You disintegrate as you listen. “Everything has changed besides myself.”

Felix leans back in to pepper kisses across the expanse of your wet features, then brings himself to one fated knee. He flicks open the lid. You don’t even spare the ring a glance; you don’t doubt its perfection. All you care to look at is the love of your life, deliquesced to adoration and tearwater.

“Thank you for being around, my dream.” His soft smile tends to your scars like ambrosia. “Will you let me do the same?”

permanent taglist (send an ask to be added)・@astraystayyh・@like-a-diamondinthesky・@fire-08・@starsandrqindrops・@txtxlz・@laylasbunbunny・@strayghibli・@nuronhe・@seungminsapuppy・@vivisoni・@skzms・@moon0fthenight・@sweetpickledjins・@svintsandghosts・@nhyunn ・@ur-boyfiend ・@liknws・@hotgorloikawa・@randomwimp ♡

© forlix (est. 090323) · liked this work? please consider reblogging, commenting, or sending me an ask to let me know; or, read my other writing here. thanks so much for the support!

[destinyc1020]

i am sorry ur getting so much crap from people. ur like the best person on here. no lie. ur fair and efficient with ur answers, and probably the nicest and least judgmental person on here. <3 Please do not let people bring u down.

i have sort of a stupid question though, can people like tuwaine and harrison and even paddy not go to these f1 events without tom? cause i figured since they're sort of in the industry they can but maybe tom just gives them more access i guess. Thats because of tuwaine's post that i asked this question btw.

Thanks Anon 🥰

In answer to your question, I'm probably the WRONG person to ask about this, because I know NOTHING about racing lol 😆

But based on Tom's post here:

And his caption here:

It kind of seems like he was invited by Tag Heuer to attend this event? 🤷🏾‍♀️

No offense to the other guys, but Tom is on another level. With that said, I'm not sure if they could have attended this event or not sans Tom?

Tuwaine and Haz's posts make me feel like they were able to go, thanks to Tom.🤷🏾‍♀️

Maybe it's the difference btwn going on an expensive vacation where you're paying yourself, vs going with a friend who has the hookup and you can go practically for FREE? 😅

[alwaysxlarrie]

a snippet + last line challenge

i’m halfway done with chapter 8 (it should be up by midweek!) so thank you to @beelou, @nooradeservedbetter, @larrysballetslippers & @beardyboyzx for tagging me to do a snippet! & thank you to @justahappycloud, @lunarheslwt, @thebreadvansstuff, @larry-hiatus, @hellolovers13 & @neondiamond for tagging me to do the last line challenge :)

snippet:

Harry will let him think whatever he wants as long as he gets to see Louis’ bicep muscles flexing. Not only does the sight make Harry’s jaw ache with how much he wants to bite them and suck a few bruises into the skin, but it's also phenomenal wank bank material. He’d never admit that if asked, but. The thought of Louis using them to pin him down, hold him up against a wall, choke him a little? Siri play ‘What Dreams Are Made Of’ by Hilary Duff, please and thank you. 

Plus, Louis is a sucker for Harry painting his nails — when he’d noticed Harry painted them a few weeks ago for the first time, Louis’ jaw had dropped and he immediately picked up Harry’s hand, gently running his thumb along the nail beds. When he’d looked back up into Harry’s eyes, Louis’ were noticeably darkened and his eyelids were hooded. The rest of the day, whenever he’d noticed Harry about to start a task that might ruin his nails, he’d intervene to help. Harry’s nails were definitely dry at this point and if they chipped, he could’ve always just redone them that night, but it was cute to see Louis care so much and it was lovely to be taken care of by him. The sexual tension had been through the roof that day, though; Niall and Liam even went as far as to stay out of Louis’ way entirely whenever they could — they did not want to get in between Louis and whatever he was going through. They didn’t even know about Harry and Louis almost getting off against Harry’s car before going home that night and Harry still couldn’t blame them. 

“You sure we really need to do that, Haz?” Louis asks with an amused glint in his eye as he raises an eyebrow.

Oh no. Louis might have caught on. There’s only one thing to do now: keep it moving. 

“Yeah, of course! We can’t form our best judgments just by looking at the photo on the paint canister, you know? Gotta open it up and look at the paint itself, too.” 

Right. Okay. Maybe not keep it moving like that. His flirting seriously, truly, honestly has a ways to go. How he managed to get someone like Louis, he’s got no idea; his game is absolutely atrocious. 

One might say that maybe his first issue is still using the word ‘game’, but that’s neither here nor there, thanks.

“Right,” Louis muses, smirking knowingly when he takes the canister, watching as Harry’s eyes immediately dart to his biceps, “well if it means so much to you, I suppose we could take a look.”

last line:

“He’s never felt so seductive and powerful before in his life; maybe there is something to be said about spontaneity being a turn on after all.”

ok so the last line is 25 words but i don’t know anyone who hasn’t done either of these atp so i’m just gonna tag a few people & not worry ab the count lol: @lululawrence, @brightgolden, @loveislarryislove, @kingsofeverything, @the-larry-way, @tommokat, @kingonafiftymetreroad, @hearyouhowling, @greenblueish & @jaerie

(also yes this fic has essentially become a long winded appreciation post for louis’ arms/biceps but can u blame me???)

[acept-arte]

He compartido 5743 publicaciones este 2022

44 publicaciones originales (1 %)

5699 reblogueos (99 %)

Estos son los blogs que más he reblogueado:

@spiritual-vibrations

@9710144

@ys19

@aaaangel444

@unreadable

He etiquetado 36 publicaciones en 2022

#spotify: 35 publicaciones

#soundcloud: 1 publicación

La etiqueta más larga tiene 10 caracteres

#soundcloud

Mis publicaciones más populares este 2022:

5

1; 32; 46 👀🎧✌🏻

1) Canción favorita

~ ufff muchas, pero actualmente diría que ésta💖:

32) Canción para escuchar en verano

~ igual la discografía entera de Roosevelt es ideal para escucharla en temporadas cálidas jeje🎈:

46) Canción que te gusta por su letra

~ de alguna u otra manera siempre estaré identificada con la letra de éste tema💛:

Descúbrela

4 notas. Fecha de publicación: 28 de junio de 2022

4

Buena canción 👌🏼

otra pregunta...

14) Canción de los 80' que te guste

superr me alegra que haya sido de tu agrado aquella canción jeje😊

~ de los 80' tengo varios temas favs igual sjsj pero la canción con la cual hace un tiempo estuve pegadisima y sin duda alguna recomendaría escuchar en cualquier ocasión, sería ésta<333

4 notas. Fecha de publicación: 2 de marzo de 2022

3

36

36) Canción más triste que conozcas

~ de las pocas que conozco, porque no suelo escuchar suficiente música triste la verdad, tendría que ser esta :

4 notas. Fecha de publicación: 18 de diciembre de 2022

2

46, 47 y 50 c: cuídate mucho, me gusta mucho tu blog c:

46) Canción que te gusta por su letra

~ varias, aunque con éste tema se me hace fácil recordar el coro y su letra en general jajaj☀ :

47) Canción que te gusta por su ritmo

~ últimamente diría que ésta canción es de mis favs para escuchar, el ritmo que tiene es wenisimo🙌 :

50) Canción cuya letra te identifique

~ de alguna u otra forma siempre me sentiré identificada con la letra de éste tema💛 :

Descúbrela

5 notas. Fecha de publicación: 3 de agosto de 2022

Mi publicación más popular de 2022

Song(s) + Name Game

Reglas: Haz una nueva publicación y deletrea tu URL con títulos de canciones, luego etiqueta a tantas personas como letras haya en tu URL.

*༚✧˳⁺⁎☆~ Playlist ~☆⁎⁺˳✧༚*

·Ésta es la playlist más corta que he hecho hasta el momento jaaa😹 9 temas que han formado y algunos siguen formando parte del soundtrack de mi vida🎧😊· **Thank you so so so much @wallowing-wallflower for the tag<333**

A - As You Are by The Weeknd

C - Cool & Calm by Sticky Fingers

E - El Mejor Recuerdo by Lucas & The Woods

P - Pangea by Roosevelt

T - Too Late by Washed Out

A - Any Friend Of Diane's by Weezer

R - Romantic Dreams by Deftones

T - The Boat I Row by Tame Impala

E - Electric Indigo by The Paper Kites

~la mayor parte de cantantes/bandas que se encuentran por acá son de mis preferidos para escuchar en la actualidad💓~

*༚✧˳⁺⁎☆~Tags~☆⁎⁺˳✧༚*

@s-4-m-u-r-4-1 @tunoeresdeverdad @elweonmasfomedetambler @d4n1k9 @soloundiamasaca @chupate-esta-agilao @amor-con-tequila-doble @el-warifaifa @la-rul0sa

(no es obligatorio hacerlo, pero igual seria cool compartir gustos/intereses musicales jeje🙌🎵😸)

11 notas. Fecha de publicación: 15 de junio de 2022

Descubre tu resumen del 2022 en Tumblr →

[futureseaempress]

WIP WEDNESDAY

thank u @happiness-of-the-pursuit for tagging me I set this up and absolutely forgot to post it but I need the extra push to finish this draft

“Fine. You deserve your Mr. Bennet.” “Now you sound like Beatrice.” “A fine woman to parrot.” Pez sips his drink, looking awfully pleased with himself. Henry basks in the momentary silence, letting his eyes close and his shoulders slump, before Percy starts up again, “Just one night out Haz and then I’ll kill the dog where it lies.” Pez proves his point by miming hitting the imaginary dog with a blunt object and for some reason Henry pictures it as a hammer. Grueling. Henry should go out just to make new friends. “That rather defeats the point of leaving the dog be.” Percy’s eyes go big and wide and pleading. “Call it broadening your horizons!” “Are you my friend or a cruise line?” Henry asks drily. Pez snaps, like he’s come up with a brilliant idea, Henry worries he’s going to suggest a drag cruise, but he just continues his crusade: “Open yourself to other worldly and complex experiences.” “Please, we live in New York. I do that when I step outside the flat.”

I’m not tagging anybody bc I’m late 🫡😔✊

[runwiththerain]

thank you for the tag haz :D

i'm going to start w/ my on repeat then stalk my 450 playlists lmao

remember that night? by sara kays

u hurt me hurts u by anson seabra

nightshift by mothica

we made it. by david hugo

idfc by blackbear

this is home by cavetown

hold on by chord overstreet

talk too much by coin

hate me if it helps by alexander 23

enough for you by olivia rodrigo

role models by ajr

astronomy by conan gray

i should hate you by gracie abrams

new americana by halsey

all by different artists woo !

open tag !!!

Saw it done by someone on the #music tag game and thought it looked fun, so I'm going to give it a go.

Rule: you must pick a song for each letter in your username

•

m - Money (that's what I want) (Barrett Strong)

i - If You Leave Me Now (Chicago)

c - Can't Stop the Music (Village People)

r - Runaway (Del Shannon)

o - Our House (Madness)

w - Who Loves You (Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons)

a - Alone Again Or (Love)

v - Visions Of Angels (Genesis)

e - Every 1-s a Winner (Hot Chocolate)

o - Old and Wise (Alan Parson Project)

n - Nights in White Satin (Moody Blues)

w - When the rain begins to fall (Jermaine Jackson and Pia Zadora)

h - Hide in Your Shell (Supertramp)

e - Even the Nights Are Better (Air Supply)

e - Electric Barbarella (Duran Duran)

l - Lindberg (Robert Charlebois & Louise Forestier)

s - Strange Magic (Electric Light Orchestra)

•

Tag list: @mon-sher-liam @hazmatazz @foodiewithdahoodie @mooncafex @weirdo09 @xxcreamixx @kuumara @ooga-booga-wooga @i-love-sweet-william @elhaspowers @dont-open-dead-inside-25 @abstract-ostrich

Inviting you guys to join, but no pressure.

Also, anyone that I didn't mention is welcome too!

[ikiyomeru]

@catncore​​ said:  ❛ ...how did you find me? ❜

random dialogue prompts // ACCEPTING  

How it singes – how it burns... Hazuki cannot help the slow breath that comes out of him – like he has to let the smoke billow out lest it choke him from the inside. In contrast to the muffled torrent within him, Hazuki appears calmed – politely sitting down from across the counter. His hand spreads, and unclenches just besides – before pressing softly against the countertop.

     “ Because you didn’t want to be found, “ comes his answer, as though it were always something so simple (it always is, to him: dig into impulse and its compulsion will spring him into flight), “ at least not by me, in any case. “ Hazuki props up his elbows – a thumb running over his wrist as he looks around with an easy smile. “ Did you think it would be hard? “

[jadeittic]

HS + Y/I: 2022 (SERIES)

EXTRA (5)

PREVIOUS. NEXT.

HARRY STYLES + PLATONIC!EX-1D MEMBER!FEM!READER

WARNINGS: girl is back from the dead..... swearing(?), basically your ordinary ig comments

loganlerman

liked by yourinstagram, sydneysweeney, aarontaylorjohnson, and 3,726,382 others

loganlerman A true model, I see.

tagged: yourinstagram

view all 34,253 comments

username TWO (PRETTY) BESTFRIENDS I WILL DEFEND FOREVER

username shes so gorgeous what the fuck

username WE LOVE A SUPPORTIVE BESTIEEE

username charlie kelmeckis and sam button reunion ❤️❤️❤️

username A GODDESS WHAAAAT

username < yn and logan 3

username ITS FHE DRESSSS ITS THE HAIR

username logan will u introduce me to her plz sir

username guys shes looking at me

harrystyles

liked by harrylambert, camimendez, emmalouisecorrin, and 4,255,892 others

harrystyles HS + Y/I. YN LN.

view all 36,637 comments

username MISS LN DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT HUN

castanedawong Drop dead gorgeous.

yourinstagram i look so rich

username saying that like you arent

username ON MY KNEES FOR HER

username she knows what shes doing

abbycowen would leave anyone for u

username MY FACE IS SO RED RN

username notice how shes staring at me 😳😳 she loves me fr

username sorry but shes looking at me…

username WIFE. MY WIFE.

username m-m-m-mommy…?

username oh my gosh i swear i had my clothes on a second ago. where did they go? wtf

yourinstagram

liked by louispartridge, sofialillis, julesleblanc, and 1,658,361 others

yourinstagram stream hs + y/i 😊 thanks

view all 53,162 comments

username EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU YN AND MARVEL FOR GETTING HIS ROLE AS EROS

username SHES GIVING US CONTENT

username THEY LOOK SO GOOD WHAT THE HEELL

emmalouisecorrin beautiful beautiful girl <33 oh you look good too, harry

username YN AND EMMA 🙇

username i have hs + y/i on repeat rn i cant get enough of this album

username SCREAMIGN SO HARD

username oh my gosh his arms. choke me with them sir

nattyiceofficial god youre both so gorgeous

username WOAH I JUST FELL IN LOVE AGAIN

username someone’s going to france tn, and that someone is named me

username i stopped breathing

harrystylesupdates

liked by username, and 11,365 others

harrystylesupdates harry styles seen at a restaurant with yn ln, logan lerman, and ana corrigan for yn’s bday!!

view all 3,912 comments

username ITS HER BIRTHDAYYYY

username HE LOOKS SO GOOD

username ITS THE SHIRT OH MY GOD

username ynrry in public again?!?!?! my life is complete

username ITS THE FIT FOR ME IM CLAIMING THIS OUTFIT

username OMG THIS IS OUR FIRST YN APPEARANCE IN PUBLIC ON HER BDAY AFTER TWO YEARS

username oh my god!!! its great to see him again!

username why does this man look so lost

username LITERALLY LIKE WHERE DID YN GO

username HIS HAIR IM SO IN LOVE

username me when my mom needs to get more stuff but im already next in line at the cashier

username HES SOOOOOO

yourinstagram

liked by analuisacorrigan, loganlerman, conangray, 3,470,238 others

yourinstagram sucks to be a third wheel today 😔 good thing i have haz with me

tagged: analuisacorrigan, loganlerman

view all 46,927 comments

username HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY YN

yourinstagram I FEEL SO OLD BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH

username logan and ana are so cute

username power couple

username WAS THIS A DOUBLE DATE OH MYYY

username HAPPY 28TH BABY

zendaya happy happy birthday sweetheaaartttt!! - tom and z

yourinstagram I MISS YOU BOTH SO MUCCCHHH

username YN LN IS 28 GUYSSSS

conangray OLIVIA AND I WISH YOU THE BESTEST BIRTHDAY

username this is so cute what the actual fuck

username manifesting birthday posts from so many celebs (and the boys) 😊

analuisacorrigan happy birthdaaayyyy, yn!!!! logan and i are so glad you spent your birthday with us and harry! love you sooo much<3

username totally not bashing my head rn

username WHERE ARE THE BDAY POSTS FROMT HE GUYYYSSSSSS

zayn

liked by momonatamada, peytonlist, simuliu, and 5,873,255 others

zayn Happy 28th to (still) the most annoying person I know. I hope you had the best day today. I just wanted to say that you’re one of the best people to enter in my life.

I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss those stupid and corny jokes you’d shout for everyone to barge into the room and hear what you have to say. Or when you purposely forget a clothing or item so we would be late for late for events.

I miss you a lot, YN. We miss you a lot. Gigi, Khai, and I love you lots. Happiest 28th, YN x

tagged: yourinstagram

comments on this post have been limited

yourinstagram love love love u so so much zaynnnnn<3333 wanna see u and the two soon ❤️

niallhoran

liked by zayn, clairo, mrdrdawson, and 4,262,746 others

niallhoran Guess whattttt! It’s YN’s birthday!!! You’re now 28. I hope your back doesn’t start to hurt soon, we wouldn’t want to hear you complain about that now, do we? It’s your day today, love! I want you to enjoy it the best you can. I’m forever grateful for everything you’ve ever done to the boys and I. You are the nicest person anyone would talk to, even if you’re mad.

Thank you thank you thank youuuuu YN for entering my life. I wouldn’t know what to do if you weren’t here since day 1. No one will ever replace you. Love youuuu and happy birthday ❤️

tagged: yourinstagram

comments on this post have been limited

yourinstagram OH MY GOD NIALL THIS IS SO SWEET THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE U

louist91

liked by dualipa, harrystyles, tchalamet, and 5,284,381 others

louist91 It’s someone’s day today! You’re almost reaching your thirties, YN. I’m so glad I got close with you and became your best friend back then with no problems. I will always be looking forward to your salty cookies, your overcooked and dried cakes you somehow always manage to ruin every single time.

Just a quick message: Please don’t change, YN. Don’t let anyone change you, not even the media. Just so you know, we’re always here for you. The boys and I are here to help you. You don’t know how much you mean to me. Happy happy birthday, YN! Hope to see you soon. ❤️

tagged: yourinstagram

comments on this post have been limited

yourinstagram totally not crying rn. totally not crying over you message lou. totally not. love u sm it hurts

liampayne

liked by 5sos, zendaya, mckennagraceful, and 4,183,487 others

liampayne It’s this lady’s birthday today! I can’t believe you’re 28 already. I remember you saying you wouldn’t want to age older than 23.

YN, your capability keep me out of problems has been one of the greatest attributes I appreciate a lot about you. I still remember back in the days when we were still in the band and how you kept the staff very busy with your naughty antics. I wouldn’t want to ask for anything more. Have a wonderful birthday, YN. Happiest 28th.

tagged: yourinstagram

comments on this post have been limited

yourinstagram paynooooooo ❤️❤️❤️ this is probably the sweetest message you’ve written to me in our whole years of knowing each other. miss you smmm!

harrystyles

liked by louist91, mrsamclaflin, anyataylorjoy, and 5,636,193 others

harrystyles Happy birthday to the coolest person I know. You’ve been there since day 1 and i’m very thankful of that. Good friends are always hard to find. Thank god I found you. You mean very much to me more than you’ll ever know. I remember when you invited me and the boys to your first ever solo concert. God, you were nervous. You didn’t know how to sing in front of all those people without us beside you.

And look at you now, hitting awards here and there. Hell, you’re now performing with me in a few days! I’m so proud of the person you’ve become, YN. I hope you never change. Love youuu and happy 28th birthday, YN ❤️

tagged: yourinstagram

comments on this post have been limited

yourinstagram i dont even have the words to reply to all the messages all of you sent me today. i love you all so much i cant explain it ❤️

ynupdates

liked by 14,692 others

ynupdates yn ln via ig story!

[riodoesstuff]

i would love if you would tell me a little about your ocs? like their names, whatever you want to say about them, and maybe what colors you associate them with.

thanks!

You have opened the gates of hell and now i will not shut up im so sorry but also thank you so so much this makes me so happy

Okay so these are my main ocs from my project "The Doomed's Vale":

Matt Myers! (They/She/He); They are one of the protags of my main story!! She like supernatural and paranormal stuff and wants to become a cryptozoologist someday :] Hazel and Liam are basically his only friends and all 3 are haunted by the horrors! I associate him with this color:

Liam Cruz Reis! (He/Him); Matt's best bro! The two have been through some rough ups and downs trust me on this one; He likes fixing / creating machines and robots! He's got a lil helping bot named Pascal that is a modified roomba; He wants to go to university so he can better his skills; I associate him with this color most of the times:

Hazel Calimeris! (She/They): Alienish monster whos escape module crashed on Liam and Matt's town; Is an incredible fighter (for human standards); She has a body condition where she needs to wear a suit that helps regulate her body temp; They want to remember what happened after the crash and find her missing family! This is the color i normally associate them with!

==> Some side notes and little things abt the 3!:

> Matt's first job was at their towns local library, run by their favorite (retired) cryptid: Mr. Mothman!;

> Liam’s bots are all named after coding languages, hence "Pascal";

> Matt is Hazel’s romantic interests in the first part of the story, later on the feelings between the two turn out to be mutual!! Love wins! ;

> Liam is Trans and Ace; Matt is Nonbinary and Sapphic along with Hazel who is also Sapphic! ;

> Their bdays are on the 13th of May (Matt), 25th of November (Liam), and something close to 28th of February (Hazel) ;

> Hazel loves the new world that they are in, but these are her favorite things: The Sun (cause its warm), The Stars (cause she never saw them), and little creatures (esp bugs);

> Liam accidentally recreated a sylladex once;

> In the start of the story Matt opens a "agency" that focuses on controlling and solving supernatural related problems; She dragged Liam with them on this one but he doesn't mind at all lmao;

> Matt calls Hazel "Haz"; Hazel calls Matt "Boo" cuz of the word BOO written behind her jacket </3

> Liam likes chill music but especially Jazz, blues and bossa nova; it helps him while hes working on stuff;

AND THATS JUST A BIT ABT THEM??? THERES SO MUCH OTHER STUFF SO MANY OTHER CHARACTERS OURGGGGHHH

But these 3? they own my heart they live rent free in my head, everything I do I do it for them

sorry for the long post it will happen again

OBS: i post abt them and my other characters all the time on here and on twitter, so if u wanna see a tad bit of more stuff check out "The Doomed's Vale" tag thumps up

[petersasteria]

jealousy, jealousy || tom holland

sour masterlist || tom || sour taglist

906 words w: it's fucked up and it's inspired by some personal shit that i'm going thru, i mention some psycho shit italics are lyrics + important note at the end.

* * * *

Retweets.

Likes.

Reacts.

Shares.

Views.

Reblogs.

Followers.

Those are the main ingredients for relapsing in our insecurities. Those things make us drown in jealousy and anger. We claim that we’re happy for other people, but it’s hard to be happy for them if they get the things that YOU want. It feels unfair and it feels like being happy for them is rubbing salt in the wound.

We all have our winning moments, but sometimes we feel like our own winning moments aren’t enough to make us happy. So, when will we finally be happy? When we get a million followers? When we get a million likes, reblogs, and retweets? A billion views until it goes viral? Billions of shares until the app crashes? Truth is, we don’t know. We don’t know until we get there.

You knew that it was unhealthy for you to be jealous of some girl, but you were supposed to be in her place. The title of being Tom’s girlfriend is supposed to be and is rightfully yours. Somehow, everything became fucked up and Tom ended up with some other girl who clearly wasn’t you. You can’t help but feel as if the universe sabotaged you when in reality, Tom just met her and after a few dates, they’re now going steady. The universe had nothing to do with it.

Everyday, you keep refreshing her Instagram profile just to see if she posted a new picture or video or an Instagram story. You knew you shouldn’t do that, but you couldn’t help it. You wanted to be happy for Tom, but he was supposed to be happy with you.

She was perfect. She had perfect teeth, perfect sense of style, perfect hair, she’s basically Little Miss Perfect and it’s actually sickening to think about it constantly. Deep down you knew you were just as pretty and just as perfect because fuck society and their standards, but you can’t let your thoughts go. You were sick of being yourself because you were convinced that you weren’t fun or interesting. You wanted to be her and it became an obsession.

You would always compare yourself to her and you would think about her often. Whenever you pick out an outfit, you’d always ask yourself if it’s something she’d wear. If the answer is no, you’d put the outfit back and look for another one. It was so unhealthy and everyone was worried about you. Tom didn’t know that this was going on, but everyone else noticed how weird you were being whenever Tom and his girlfriend were around.

“She went to Brazil with her friends recently. Tell them, babe!” Tom excitedly nudged her before she told her amazing vacation story. You wanted to roll your eyes, but you didn’t want everyone to see that. She was talking about the vintage clothes she bought there and her phone was passed around for everyone to see her photos in Brazil. Admittedly, you thought you were crazy for thinking these things. You should be happy for her and Tom, but it was difficult.

They say we shouldn’t bring down someone during their winning season because we don’t know how much they lost in their losing season. As much as you believed in that, you can’t help but feel that her win is your loss. Even though it’s not true, you still thought that way. You were tearing yourself apart over someone who wanted to be your friend, but your jealousy was hindering you from doing so.

You wanted to be her so bad that you swore to yourself that if you were a psycho, you’d probably wear her skin just to be her for at least a day. The only thing stopping you from doing so is the fact that you’re not a psycho and you’re a good person. Technically, you were capable of skinning someone alive and wearing their skin, but you choose not to listen to the call of the void. It would wreck you if you did.

It’s karaoke night and everyone was there. To get this off your chest, you decided to sing ‘jealousy, jealousy’ by Olivia Rodrigo. When you sang the bridge, you meant every word. Only Harry seemed to catch on as he listened intently.

All your friends are so cool, you go out every night

In your daddy’s nice car, yeah you’re livin’ the life

Go a pretty face, a pretty boyfriend, too

I wanna be you so bad and I don’t even know you

All I see is what I should be

Happier, prettier, jealousy, jealousy

All I see is what I should be

I’m losin’ it, all I get’s jealousy, jealousy

When the song was over, everyone clapped and told you that you sounded really good. “Wow, I didn’t know you could sing like that, Y/N! You sound really good.” She smiled brightly at you. “I’m jealous. I wish I could sing like you.”

You wanted to tell her that you were jealous of her too because she got the man of your dreams, but you took the compliment because for once in your life, someone you’re jealous of is jealous of YOU. That’s so fucking rare and it doesn’t happen to everyone. For once in your life, you had the upper hand and it made you happy. Genuinely happy. In this round, you were finally better than her.

You stared at her and grinned, “Thanks.”

* * * *

i apologize to the writers in this site who im jealous of. there's so many of you, but i want you all to know that im sorry for feeling so jealous and insecure of my own shit that i let it get in the way of getting along with you. im sorry for cutting people off all bc i got consumed by jealousy and im sorry for being an asshole and i understand if the friends i used to have here won't want to talk to me anymore. it's all my fault and i'd be the cause of my own death, i swear. anyway, i wont tag any of you bc i want to avoid stirring shit up and also, none of you will see or read this. i hope you're all okay and i wish you guys everything good in this world. im sick of feeling this way. i need therapy.

to my friends @blueleatherbag @justasmisunderstoodasloki @hjoficrecs @allyz, i want to thank u for being super supportive and thank u for staying by my side when everything was rough. i love all three of you and im sorry if i dont say it enough.

𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @celestialholland @alinastarkrovs @piscesparker @prancerrparkerr @spideyspeaches @givebuckyhisplumsnow @blueleatherbag @theonly1outof-a-billion @hollandbroz-n-haz @starlight-starks @webmeupspiderdaddy @studiesinspanish @bi-lmg @minejungwoo @blossomhollands @markhyucksmells @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch @simonsbluee @itszulli

[sweetsubharry]

hey ! sorry to bother you but could you reccomend me some fics of footballer louis?? thank you !! love your acc

Hiya!!  💖you can never bother me!! ^-^ ohmgosh I’m so glad you like my blog! I love footballer louis djskasdhjag tysm(sorry it took soooo long!)

please make sure you read the tags and stay safe everyone!💖

Also these are not in any particular order, however I will say the first two are probably my favourites ;) I have to read them again right after this!

freeze this moment in a frame and stay like this by rosesau

Harry (not so) secretly crushes on the cute footie player and fills pages with sketches of him.

Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow by 1Diamondinthesun

Harry spends most of his time in an empty house or a lonely darkroom, dreaming of leaving his small town for art school. He's invisible to most people. And then Louis Tomlinson sees him. Life will never be the same.

Or, the American high school AU loosely inspired by She's All That.

Definition of Beauty by zanni_scaramouche

“Your book is upside down.” Harry nods at Louis’ book, his history text now that he sees it too.

“I’d rather study you.”

They both blink, startled by the slip.

“With you. Study with you,” Louis rushes to say. “Liam says I’m shite at history, can you help?”

Louis’ caught off guard by an omega he nearly takes out with an errant footie ball. It’s not that Louis’ never seen Harry before, it’s that he can’t stop looking, and he’s desperate to figure him out.

Coffee Cups and Football Boots by kimtaedumb

Harry’s stood behind the counter again, but this time he’s painting his nails. Louis strolls up to the counter and, thanks to his no brain-to-mouth filter, blurts out, “Isn’t that a little girlish, Haz?” leaning closer to inspect.

Harry lets out a little huff as his hand slips, “Oh, damn, now I’ve messed it up,” he pouts and turns to Louis, “Why should making myself feel pretty be girly?”

Louis holds up his hands in surrender, “’M not judging, jus’ curious is all.”

(The entirely cheesy and cliché Christmas AU, in which Harry doesn’t give a damn what people think about him – mostly – and Louis may be a little bit in love.

Alternatively, the one in which Harry owns a café that’s barely scraping by and Louis is a footballer and he takes Harry away for Christmas.

Featuring Zayn as a cocky little shit that most definitely needs to be put back in his place, Niall as the loveable Irish dude who drinks too much and flirts with Zayn more than the average girl, and Liam who loves everyone but hates them all at the same time.)

Way in the World by flowsque

When Louis Tomlinson enters the waiting room, Harry can distinctly feel his heart sinking to his stomach. The man's hair is ruffled and dishevelled and his red jersey, damp with sweat from training, clings to his perfect and chiseled body. He stands there, almost unreal, against the glass door, peering inside the office. Harry knew this would’ve happened, sooner or later. That he would have bumped into him. They play for the same club after all, even if they’re in different leagues. It’s not weird. It is not. Except it totally is. - Or, the one where Harry has a knee injury and an embarrassing crush on Manchester United's pretty number ten.

I Long For You by AnotherAnonymousWriter

Thirty minutes later, he's sat on a bench in Hyde Park with a book in his lap and a travel mug with hot tea in his hand. Not far from where he's sat, a group of boys are playing football and a bunch of children are chasing each other. Life is good.

Or at least, life is good until he hears a familiar “LOOK OUT!” and sees a football flying in the direction of his face.

And then everything is black.

(Harry gets hit in the head by various objects and falls for a boy with blue eyes.)

ease the quiet and talk me down by cabinbythesea

Harry's a model and Louis' a footie player.

(Louis teaches Harry some football and Harry is insanely good at giving a lapdance).

Baby, It's You by Bearandleonardwrite

"Oh, yeah. Um..” Harry lets his hands fall to his sides. His brows furrow, face full of concern, and he asks, “You’re not, like, stalking me, are you?”

Louis can’t help the loud cackle that escapes his lips and immediately slaps one of his hands over his mouth to muffle the sound. “Oh my god, Harry, no!” Louis tells him, a little breathlessly, giggles still bubbling out of his chest. “Lottie’s one of the makeup artists here today and she somehow got me to agree to come. I had no idea you modeled for, uh.. this brand until I saw you walk.”

“Oh,” Harry says dumbly, eyebrows still pinched. He lets what Louis just said sink in before a bright grin takes over his face and he goes back to doing up the buttons on his shirt. “Well, that’s alright, then. I’m glad you could make it.

(Basically, Louis' a footie player for Man U and Harry's a YSL model. They meet at a masquerade.)

Touch by kotabear24

Harry's shy and virginal with a past, new on the football team; Louis' the (experienced) popular star of the team and Harry's new mentor.

Come In and Change My Life by lightswoodmagic (sarah_writes)

He’d had the same neighbours since he’d moved into the building, a lovely, wealthy couple in their late sixties who had always invited him around for tea on Sundays. Martha had dropped off homemade biscuits the day he’d moved in, so Harry figured he may as well repeat the sentiment. He could hear someone getting closer to the door just as a flush ran through his body; oh fuck. His heat was close, too close to be knocking on a potentially unknown alpha’s door, but it was too late. The door swung open, and Harry’s mouth dropped. He’d never been overly interested in football, couldn’t find the fascination in watching men run around after a ball for hours aside from their uniforms, but he knew who this was. Louis Tomlinson, alpha, captain of Manchester United, star in a number of Harry’s heat addled fantasies, was his new next-door neighbour.

Or, Harry and Louis become friends when Harry looks after Louis' cat during away games, until one night at a party changes everything between them. It's just a shame Louis' going to be away for the FIFA World Cup for three months.

see the truth (it's me for you) by orphan_account

If you asked Louis the first day of his French Literature class what he’d be doing on the last, he’d probably never have guessed it would involve helping a poorly Harry Styles study for the final exam. Good thing he’s not a betting man.

(Or the one where Louis and Harry spend an entire semester ignoring each other after a one-night stand, only to come face to face when Harry manages to catch the stomach flu during finals week. Sometimes fate is funny like that.)

Use Your Words by zedi

based off this prompt: collage au where jock!harry always serenades flowercrown!louis with love songs in their music class. what nobody knows is that harry actually kinda means the words he sings.

But instead it's Louis as the jock and Harry as the flowerchild because I do what I want.

Stop The World (I Wanna Get Off With You) by ilikepianos

"You like this, don't you?", he asks breathlessly.

What? Sucking cock? Being dominated? Yes, all of that. A big fat yes.

Harry nods, lips still wrapped around Louis' throbbing dick.

Louis' lips curl into a smirk. "Keep going then. You're doing amazing, love."

OR: The uni-football AU where Harry may or may not have a minor crush on the captain of the team and suddenly discovers that the feeling is very much mutual.

Picture Perfect by LittleBubbleStyles

an AU where Louis Tomlinson is a misunderstood football player, and Harry Styles is a misunderstood photographer. Somehow, they're understood together.

I just think about my baby; I'm so full of love I could barely eat by mercutionotromeo

Harry and Louis are six hundred miles apart, but they have the same solutions to the same problem.

Or: a masturbation drabble featuring pillow humping, locker rooms, and copious amounts of dirty talk.

into another (another) serotonin overflow by mercutionotromeo

Harry wants this year to be different - wants it to be the year that he finally gets over this stupid crush. He’s going to uni, he needs to decide what he wants to do with his life.

Instead, he’s deciding what he wants to do to Louis Tomlinson.

Or: Sweet first time sex wherein Harry's adorably awkward, Louis is achingly cool, and Harry rides Louis wearing his jersey.

note: it says it in the tag but this is the edited version written in 2019, rather than the 2017 original- so there’s two put I put the link for the newest one :)

need a little sweetness in my life by mercutionotromeo

Harry's always liked feeling desperate and small when Louis touches him, but when he sucks Harry off...it’s fucking otherworldly. Desperate’s not really the word at that point - it’s helpless. Like… like the fucking world could stop spinning and Harry wouldn’t be able to do anything about it until Louis finished him off with his lips and his tongue.

Or, Harry and Louis go to university together. Harry really likes it when Louis sucks him off, and Louis really likes it when Harry calls him Daddy.

(Sequel to "into another serotonin overflow")

I made a map of your stars by brightbluelou

Harry does not have a crush on Louis Tomlinson. Yes, Louis is very pretty and funny, and Harry may have had more than a few inappropriate thoughts about him, but he certainly doesn’t like him. (Except for the fact that he totally does.) or, Harry is the shy boy in the back of the class that no one really notices. Louis is the loud, outgoing football player that everybody likes.

We Made These Memories for Ourselves by supernope

Breath held, Harry squints his eyes open and focuses on the first stick. A blue line. Harry breathes out an unsteady breath. He’s pretty sure he read that one blue line is a negative, but he fishes the box from the bottom of the pile just to make sure.

“Negative,” he confirms, voice echoing around the small room. “Next.”

Now that he’s feeling a little less shaky, he scans the rest of the tests at once, is met with a headache-inducing mixture of pink plus signs and blue double lines. His heart rate picks up until it’s pounding triple-time in the base of his throat and the pit of his stomach, thundering in his ears and throbbing in his temples. He flips over the rest of the boxes slowly, but he knows what they’re going to say before he even looks.

[or, Louis is a footballer, Harry owns a bakery, and they're having a baby.]

Kiss Me on the Mouth and Set Me Free by ls2k14   

Louis has his head thrown back in a laugh, his wet fringe hanging in front of his eyes, and a beautiful flush to his cheeks. From this angle, the sun hits his face just right to where the beams of light are shining in between the spaces of each individual clump of watered down eyelashes. His chest is showing through the soaked material of his white jersey and it seems that his biceps are attempting to break free from the sleeves that are clinging to his skin.

And Harry can do nothing except take it all in. He doesn’t even think he’s breathing at this point. He is literally stuck in place, admiring the true beauty of Louis Tomlinson, while being surrounded by fit footballers and generally attractive people. He doesn’t think he’s ever been in love before, but if Louis let him, he’s pretty damn sure he could change that in the matter of a few nanoseconds.

[marvelousell]

The Agreement (Part 6.)

Pairing(s): frat boy!fwb!Tom x reader, frat boy!Harrison x reader

Summary: Tom is a typical frat boy, his love for partying, drinks and girls are bigger than his ego. Y/N is a whole different dimension, she keeps her circle small, and even though she knows her best friend Tom is a total douche, she can’t say no to the little deal that was sealed between the two of them.

Word count: 3.1k

A/N: My heart is beating for Haz rn but Tom is my fave so I’m confused af ok😫. Also who tf is Emily🤡? I hope you like this chapter and I would appreciate it if you leave a comment, reblog or send a feedback!❤️

My tag list is open for this series!

Warnings: flufff, swearing, mentions of alcohol

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4. Part 5.

Masterlist

“Ready?”

Monday came quickly honestly. Probably the constant overthinking during the whole Sunday and Monday morning distracted you pretty well.

And here you are now.

Fresh out of the shower, with your robe around your body staring at Anna in front of your door who was ready to ‘glam you up’.

“I don’t know, I think I’m gonna puke if we’re being honest.” You spoke, exhaling the air from your lungs.

“It’s totally normal to feel like that! That means you like him.” She winked, marching to your bedroom.

“Well I do like him and that’s why I’m worried. What if I mess everything up? I’m so awkward you know that.” You began to panic, chewing on your bottom lip nervously.

“Just be yourself, he is already smitten. Believe me, what could go wrong?”

Maybe the truth about Tom, I don’t know.

“You’re right, but I’m still sweating and I feel sick.”

“Can’t wait for you to return from the date and say to me ‘oh I was so stupid for worrying it was amazing Ann I love him!’” She mocked you, laughing along with you.

“I really hope that will be the end product after tonight’s date.”

“Harrison is a really great guy, you will have the best night with him I’m sure.”

Your mouth curved into a smile at the thought of him.

At the thought of his blue eyes and his contagious laugh that was ringing in your ears since Saturday.

Maybe he really is the one for you?

If only Tom didn’t come that night at your apartment, everything would be fine.

The thoughts were eating you up, but you tried to remain calm.

“Just remember Tom’s words. Maybe this deal won’t last that long.” You said to yourself.

“So what are we doing for tonight?” Anna spoke resting her arms on the chair, looking at your reflection in the mirror.

“Nothing extra, keep it casual.” You replied, not wanting to look like you’re going to a red carpet.

“Keep it casual got it.”

“Did you spoke with Tom yesterday?” She asked curiously, making your heart skip a beat when she mentioned his name.

You were trying your best not to react.

“No, he didn’t call me. Why, did something happen?” You asked, trying to look worried.

“No, no. Just asking I thought that he maybe apologized or something, but it seems he is still acting like a total douche.”

You kind of forgot the scene from the party, Harrison being on your mind practically every second.

But now that she reminded you, you were pissed. He could at least call and say a stupid ‘sorry’, however he was too proud. Tom would never admit he was wrong even when it was a small, unimportant thing.

“You know he is like that when he is around a girl that he wants to shag, but still I don’t approve that, I mean we’re his friends.” You responded.

“That’s absolutely right. Gosh I don’t know how could someone sleep with him? I know he is hot and all that but c’mon Tom just thinks with his thing down there and that’s disgusting.” She spoke bitterly while your face turned red.

You don’t know a thing Anna, but you’re definitely right about that.

He just knows how to make a girl say yes straight away, that’s the problem.

“U-uh yes, I agree.” Your voice coming out as a whisper.

“Let’s not ruin our night with him, we love him although he is like that so it’s not important. Did our prince charming say where you two are going?” She changed the subject, focusing on your hair that was the last thing that needed to be done.

“Didn’t drop a single clue, he just said he will pick me up at seven.” You chuckled, glancing at the clock.

Thirty minutes and he will be here.

-

“Oh shit he is outside.” You whisper yelled, heart almost jumping out of your chest.

“Listen. Don’t worry, just relax and be yourself. Harrison is fantastic and not a pompous dick like others.” She put her palms on your shoulders giving them an encouraging squeeze.

You closed your eyes, inhaling deeply to calm your nerves.

“Thank you so much Ann, I owe you big times. I will call you when I come home or you can stay here and make yourself comfortable whatever you want.” You said, hugging her tightly.

“Thanks for the offer but I will go home, and I will be waiting for your call. And you miss have fun.” She smiled like a proud mother, hugging you back.

Your hands were shaking, and your stomach lurched when you saw him leaned on his black car waiting for you.

You both immediately smiled at each other.

Harrison was as nervous as you were. He spent his whole day rambling to Harry that tried his best not to laugh at his friend who was totally excited to see the girl that couldn’t leave his head the whole weekend.

He was finally ready to find a girl. Someone who will be here even when things went downhill.

“Good evening gorgeous.” Harrison greeted, flashing you a broad smile.

“Well good evening to you too handsome.” You greeted him back, standing now in front of him with a shy smile plastered on your face.

“You look stunning tonight love.” He half whispered, with his eyes still on yours.

“Thank you, so do you.”

“Ready to hop in?” He asked, opening the door for you.

“Of course, how could I not be with a gentleman like you by my side?” You flirted shamelessly, making him laugh.

“Eager to know where I’m taking you?” He asked, starting a conversation.

Your eyes were glued on the road and everything around trying to guess where you were heading to.

“Definitely, hope you’re not gonna kill me or something already.”

“Too much criminal series love.” He chuckled at your response.

“And I would still want the place to remain a surprise, but don’t worry nothing will happen.” He added.

“It better not Harrison I trust you.” You continued to joke, enjoying the rest of the drive.

-

“And we’re here beautiful.” He parked his car, opening the door for you again.

Holy fuck.

The view was mesmerizing. It was like a hill, with a view on the whole city that was glowing now.

Your whole face lit up, not only because he was creative and didn’t take you to a classic restaurant on the first date but because you had such a great person next to you to enjoy the breathtaking view with.

“This is truly stupendous Harrison..Gosh.” You were so dumbfounded at the sight that you didn’t feel the warmth of his body behind you.

“I’m so glad you like it, I wanted to take you somewhere special the first time.” He spoke into your ear, sending shivers down your spine.

“I appreciate that a lot, and you really left me speechless here.” You giggled, turning your face to his.

Harrison put a lot of effort in this, wanting to show you how much he fancied you.

This wasn’t just an ordinary place that he googled up or something.

This was Harrison’s special place ever since he was twelve. He would often come here when he needed some time for himself or when he wanted to sit and relax looking at the whole town that was in a rush as always.

The place was unique in Harrison’s life. His gut told him he could trust you and that this was a brilliant timing to share it with you.

He hoped maybe it will be your special place by the end of the night, because he was sure you were the girl that will change his life.

“It’s actually my secret place or whatever they call it nowadays.” His eyes lit up looking at the two most beautiful sights in front of him.

“Oh no sorry, now I ruined the whole secret place thing for you.” You grabbed his hand, feeling bad in some kind of way.

“Don’t be silly love, if I thought you weren’t noteworthy I wouldn’t share it with you.” His fingers stroked your skin carefully, making your heartbeat go wild at the feeling of his gentle touch.

“Happy to hear that you think I’m that special.” You whispered, noticing the small blanket positioned on the grass behind him.

“C’mon let’s sit and enjoy the real magic from here.” His hand took yours, rubbing his thumb against your palm.

-

“So you study English Literature?” He asked, pouring the sparkling wine in your glass.

He sure planned this all well, and you weren’t complaining. In fact you loved it so much that you could sit like this forever. Just you and him.

“That’s right. Does it sound that boring?” You asked, the nervousness now long gone.

“Absolutely not! Mr. Phillips must be your favourite professor I assume?” He rose his eyebrow asking sarcastically.

“Are you like in my class or something because that would be awkward as hell. And no c’mon he is a total ass.”

“If I was with you in the same class I would definitely ask a beauty like you out a long time ago, don’t worry. My sister is taking his classes, she started her first year so you know heard some stuff.” He chuckled, sipping his wine.

“I’m sorry for her, he can be an idiot towards students but that shouldn’t discourage her at all.”

“Totally, every college has someone like that.” He added, receiving a nod from you.

You two were talking like you knew each other your whole life and that was something you craved for a long time.

Harrison couldn’t keep his eyes the whole night away from you.

It was something about your irresistible smile and how your head would fall back when you laughed that got him love-struck.

He really liked you and your sweet soul that was full of tenderness.

That was something he could never find in someone ever since Emily.

“Tired?” He gave you a half-smile when he felt your head resting on his shoulder.

“No, just loving this atmosphere and your presence. I could do this every day for the rest of my life if you ask me.” You said softly.

Harrison thought that this was the perfect timing to wrap his arm around your waist, caressing it carefully.

He was sure he wanted to kiss in you that exact moment. Even though he was distracted by his heart that was a beating mess and by his sweaty palms, he couldn’t wait more. He reminded himself if he waited and didn’t speak to you that night nothing of this would happen, so what could go wrong now?

He didn’t want it to be forced, it should be memorable for the both of you.

What’s the point if he doesn’t show you how much he liked you through the kiss?

So his hands leisurely traveled to your arm and shoulder. Your skin was landscaped with goosebumps, and you were sure he could see how your cheeks turned red although it was dark.

You relaxed in his hands, leaning your face into his neck inhaling his scent.

The grin on his face was growing bigger when he felt your body on his, he would trade anything just to be always like this with you from now on.

His fingertips brushed the skin of your hot cheek while his eyes were admiring your body that was illuminated by the moonlight.

Eventually his large palm cupped your cheek, bringing you close to his face.

His nose bumped into yours, his eyes now focused on your sparkling ones.

“Is this okay?” He asked for consent.

“Yes.” You whispered back, wrapping your hand around his wrist.

“God you’re so beautiful.” His lips were ghosting over yours, still testing the waters.

Harrison was exhilarated at that moment, closing the small space between your lips. They were moving against yours delicately. He could taste the sweet wine from your lips mixing with the taste of your cherry chapstick and it was a combination that he will always associate with you.

Your heart fluttered, and the only thing you could think is how his lips were soft against yours.

Harrison would break the kiss, opening his eyes to ensure himself that you were real and that this wasn’t a figment of his imagination before pulling you in for another short innocent kiss.

You both stayed close to each other after the intimate moment, with Harrison’s thumb still on your cheek.

“I really like you Y/N, I want to be around you more.” He spoke in your ear, nothing but the truth.

“And I like you more, hopefully this will be something more.” You responded truthfully as well.

“Thanks for the wonderful evening love, and thank you for giving me a chance to finally find and enjoy the time with someone as pretty as you, inside and out.”

“No, thank you for everything. You were the first who showed some love and interest for who I really am, not just for some fun.” Your voice getting smaller when you said the last part.

“Love, if someone doesn’t see your true beauty behind that graceful face, he doesn’t deserve a single look from you, let alone something more.”

Oh how right you were Harrison, you don’t even know.

You were a grinning mess after his statement, the only thanks you could give him was a small peck.

-

The car stopped in front of your apartment, silence now filling the space in his car.

His hand rested on top of yours through the whole ride back to the apartment.

Harrison was beaming, glancing every now and then at you, memorising every feature of yours.

“Here we are.”

There was just a little bit of sadness that could be heard in his voice, because the night was over and he was already missing you in his embrace.

“Thank you for this beautiful night. You really made it special.” You spoke once again, caressing his hand that you refused to let go.

“Please love, I already said what I really mean. You are a wonderful person and no one could prove me wrong.”

“You Y/N made this night one of my favourites and thank you for that.” He admitted, kissing you passionately.

This one was a much longer and caring. The kiss was like a perfect match and it made you smile during it.

“Thank you.” You murmured as he pulled away.

“I’m going to call you love, I can’t wait to see you again.”

“Not if I call you first.” You answered.

“I won’t complain.”

“Have a good night beautiful.” He added, pecking your lips.

“And you as well handsome.”

It was like you forgot how to walk when you stepped out of his car. Harrison’s vehicle not leaving the driveway until he was sure you entered the house safely.

The smile on your face was genuine and the whole night was repeating in your head non-stop.

It occupied your mind so much that you didn’t even notice the light being turned on in the living room.

Until a loud groan finally caught your attention.

“Who’s there?” Your voice trembling.

“Fuck, just me.” A male voice responded, mumbling the words.

Just me?

“Are you normal? How did you even enter the apartment?” You relaxed immediately when your eyes landed on a half drunk Tom.

“Key behind the flowerpot, not a brilliant hiding place if you ask me.” He laughed while his eyes remained closed.

“Yeah..right, forgot about that. What do you want?” You spitted, clearly annoyed at the realisation that you will probably not spend the night alone.

“Gotta see my favourite girl, but looks like she was busy.” Tom slurred, resting his hands on the back of his head.

“Tom if you’re drunk you can crash on the couch.” You stated, making your way to your bedroom.

“C’mon babe, wanted to spend the night with you.” He rushed next to you, grabbing your waist.

“Thought you didn’t do that.”

“I meant as friends love, but I can always make an exception for you.” Tom whispered as the smell of the strong alcohol hit your nostrils.

“Are you going to talk to me and say why are you here or?” You tried again.

“I was with Sophie today ya know. It kinda went well I guess? Or not? Because she said I’m gonna regret that decision and that tone but hey I don’t care at least her annoying ass is out of my face.” He smiled, receiving an eye roll from you.

“I told you to talk politely, now she is going to get all crazy.”

“I was polite! But she just doesn’t understand what it means I don’t want anything with you. That’s the problem.”

“Okay, you have a point here, she can get pretty hard to handle.” You believed his words knowing she was a special case.

“Thank you. Also I came to apologize for my behaviour.” Tom added, mumbling the last words.

“Oh really? Why?” You crossed your arms, waiting for him to speak.

“Because I was tipsy, and that was a shit move, you know I didn’t mean that.”

“It was.” Your mouth set in a hard line.

“I’m sorry love okay?”

“You’re forgiven, apologize to Ann as well.” You weren’t in a mood for a fight, and he at least said sorry so all good.

“Not happy to see me love?” He turned his attention to you, squeezing your hips.

“I’m tired Tom, but I appreciate your apology and everything, feel free to take the couch.”

“Where were you that late on a weeknight anyways?” Tom asked curiously, eyeing your body and how pretty you looked tonight.

“On a date.”

Date?

Oh yes Harrison.

That dolled up for him?

Why does he even care about that, you two were nothing?

“Looks like you had fun. Tell me more.”

“You really won’t let me sleep tonight am I right?” You asked, trying your best not to smile but he was making it so hard already.

“Nah, let’s make ourselves comfortable on the couch and spend the night like that hm?” He smirked, pulling you back into the living room.

“Why can’t I say no to you? You need to stop that.”

It was so hard, switching thoughts about two boys every minute. One second it was Harrison only and then Tom just shows up out of nowhere and makes everything go wild inside of you.

You didn’t want to lose Tom nor Harrison.

However you were aware that someone in the end will get heartbroken no matter what, and that was your main concern.

-

Tag List

@averyfosterthoughts @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @timey-wimey-lovi @rachaeldonnaspiteri1 @peterparker-rickybowen-mybabies @sweetestscape @quacksonhq @stuckyyrogers @kaylinfayezink @tomhollandthing @stardustom @hannahholland1811 @yoinkyourheart @magicwithaknife @thurstyforholland @quaksonhehe @fanficscuziranout @runway-to-my-aid @definitely-not-black-cat @got-to-get-away @littlebookbengal @primadonnasdream @readheadwriter @ifntelyinspirit @juliebean247 @hes-amarillo @danicarosaline @lukesbabylon @lulueliott24 @tomshufflepuff @sandtopearl @peteysbaby @lukeys-giggle @supernaturalwriter24 @synonymforlame

[wri0thesley]

So nat, today as I cracked open ur blog like my morning newspaper, I noticed u mentioned haz is having trouble finding hawks fics??? I have come to recommend @lovekeigo and @whumperooni, both of whom have some of that god tier keigo takami content uwu

paging tumblr user @hazgojo dfvnjkfgjnk. and thank u from me also anon! i dont follow a lot of bnha writers bc i am frightened of going in main tags but >:3

[parkersbliss]

Baby Surprise | T. Holland

Pairing: Dad Tom Holland X Pregnant Reader

Wc; 900ish

Request: @averyfosterthoughts can I please ask for nr 008 from fluffy list 😍❤️ & @tomhollandisabae heyyy!! could u write a blurb w tom fluff #008 when he finds out that the reader is pregnant?? 🥰❤️

Synopsis: Accidental Pregnancy gone right.

a/n: Hope you are all staying safe inside!

Masterlist | Taglist

Not my gif

...

You held the small stick in your hands, two pink lines mocking you in the face. This was real, it was happening, you were pregnant. You wanted kids, yes, but not now. Tom was at the peak of his career and you didn't want to burden him with a baby. A baby. Instinctively, you place a hand over your stomach, smiling to yourself. There was a mini you or Tom growing inside of you at his moment. You were brought back to reality when you realized you had to tell Tom, and you weren't exactly sure how. Picking up your phone you decided to call Harrison over, hoping maybe he could help you.

...

Harrison strolled into your house, greeting you with a hug. "You summoned me."

You grin at the blonde, "Yeah, I need your help with something, it's a surprise for Tom."

Harrison wiggles his eyebrows at you, "What is it?"

You grab the test out of your pocket, Harrison's eyes go wide.

"Is that...?"

"I'm pregnant."

Harrison runs a hand through his curls, "Wow, wow, I mean congratulations!" He said, hugging you again.

"Thank you, but um, how do I tell him?"

It was at that moment, Tom opened the front door. The house seemed quiet for a Sunday morning. He walked around to the living room and saw you and Harrison. You were whispering softly, but he caught the end of your sentence, "how do I tell him?"

Now, don't get Tom wrong, he trusted you, after all, you were married, but that didn't mean that what you just said confused him. He decided to stay quiet, peering in on his wife and best mate.

"Why are you worried about it, he's your husband," Harrison said, eyebrows knitted together.

You sighed, "I know, but we didn't want kids for at least a few more years. Tom's at the peak of his career, I don't want to stop him."

Tom felt his heartbeat speed up, kids. You were pregnant, with his baby. He instantly felt guilty for making you feel that way. You weren't a burden to him and you never would be.

"(Y/N), he's your husband, he's going to be ecstatic," Harrison reassures you.

"You think so?" You perk up, fidgeting with your thumbs.

"Yeah."

"But what about the media? That's the other thing, this is all happening too soon and I don't want the whole world to know I'm pregnant. I'm not ready for the baby to be exposed to that just yet."

Harrison nods, "No, I get it, but you still have at least eight months to prepare, right? Do you know how far along you are?"

"6 weeks," You reply.

"You'll have plenty of time to work all of this out. In the meantime, you should rest and tell Tom later."

Tom wasn't sure how to casually tell you he was listening to the conversation. He especially didn't want to scare you now that he knew there was a tiny human growing inside of you.

"Thank you, Haz."

He smiles at you, before placing a hand on your stomach, "Hey bud, it's your Uncle Haz, I'm going to be your favorite, right? Yeah."

You laugh at Harrison and that's when Tom decided to clear his throat.

You turn around, eyes wide, "Hey."

Tom gives you a look and you laugh nervously, "How much did you hear?"

Harrison takes that as his cue and decides to go wait in the kitchen.

"I heard everything."

"Tom, I'm so sorry, I know you're busy right now and-"

Tom crosses the room and lifts the material of your T-shirt to place a warm hand on your stomach.

"Tom-"

"Is there really a baby in there?" He asks quietly, tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

You hand him the pregnancy test and whisper a quiet yes.

Tom bends down to place kisses all over your stomach, you giggle, running a hand through his chestnut locks. He then stands up and places a soft kiss on your lips.

"We're having a baby! I'm going to be a dad, and you're going to be a mom and we're going to be parents!" He said excitedly.

You laugh at his excitement, feeling all your worries drift away. "Yeah, we are."

"And about what you said, I'm going to work super hard now so I can take a three-month break when you're due and spend time with you and the baby. And I will hire top-notch security to make sure you're both safe."

You can feel warm tears run down your cheeks, "I love you."

Tom kisses you again, "I love you so much, and you," He said to the baby.

"They're going to be so lucky," You said to Tom, thinking about the family you both had.

"Mmhm," Tom agrees. He then runs into the kitchen to grab Harrison, "I'm going to be a dad!!" He shouts. "Ooh, grab my phone I'm calling the boys!"

Harrison laughs at him, turning toward you, eyebrows raised, "And here you were worried."

"I'm starting to think Harry is going to be the favorite uncle."

"Hey!"

"I'm an uncle?!" Harry screams from Tom's phone. "Hold up, I'm getting the family, see you in ten!"

The line goes dead and Tom smiles bashfully. "I hope you don't mind the company."

"Not at all, dad," You tease.

"I want to be called Uncle Haz!" Harrison pouts.

"Okay, dad and Uncle Haz, you're in charge of lunch."

"What?!"

"Help a pregnant lady out, will ya?"

They both groan but walk toward the kitchen.

"Oh please, just wait until I can't walk anymore!"

"Why'd you have to knock her up, mate?" Harrison jokes.

"I heard that!"

Tagged: @honeybittersweet

[nukeleer]

I added 81 tags in 2021

#husbando - 15 posts

#ask - 10 posts

#haz - 10 posts

#cute - 9 posts

#waifu - 7 posts

#hot - 7 posts

#fav - 6 posts

#my art - 6 posts

#thank u - 6 posts

#god i wish that were me - 5 posts