#thank u anon i hadnt thought of these!!

[tartagliatum]

I was thinking about your recent post (your most recent rambles post in tags) in regards to 6nemo and 4ggravate; please say you like at least one group/polycule! It would be so cute with Kaveh! I feel it really fits with him (✦ ‿ ✦)

yes!!!!!!!! yes i do!!!!!!! i love 4gg (adore one half and don't mind the other) but i always go crazy for 6nemo

and so many possibilities!! x/iao or a/ether or w/anderer would be the ones with the prescription but you know v/enti and k/azuha always jump first at the opportunity to smoke with them

i guess it would take away the hurt aspect of the hurt/comfort but maybe another hc that k/azuha convinces h/eizou to smoke to relax from the stress caused by overworking. finally able to relax for the first time in a long time, finally able to enjoy eating without always being distracted by something else :3 k/zuha being so happy to see him happy, happy to see him enjoy the same thing as him, happy to rub his tummy after eating a lil too much and see him sated and sleepy and relaxed instead of irritable and strung out~ finally indulging and living carefree enough to delight in lifes small pleasures, even if only for a little while

[rattkachuk]

Hello! Hope you are having a good day.

So I have a question for you, just ignore when you don't feel like answering.

I came to Mattdrai via the enemies/rivals to lovers tag and then got sucked into hockey. I really like the fanon take on Leon, fav character, fanon Matthew was fine but way too woobified and infantilized in so many fics. So my surprise when I started to watch games, interviews etc. Public Matthew is so confident, so loving, awesome family to back him up, especially Brady, hot as hell, sexy way of playing hockey, amazing public persona. Loved and respected by his team, beyond hockey.

Then Leon. His only trait seems to be that he's pissy which I can appreciate but it seems that he's just a downright mean, arrogant guy with a superiority complex (see that interview when he puts Silovs down.) I don't find him stoic at all but he's just seems boring and bland and yeah, pissy. It doesn't seem like he has fun or likes his team a lot or is liked by them (Connor aside and his skills aside.) His friendship with Connor seems the only endearing or likeable thing. He even looks good in a bland way and his hockey is while it's so skillful it's not hot and also I wonder why his dirty plays aren't called out more often.

So what do I miss? Where does great fanon Leon come from? Why is he written mostly so superior to Matthew and where comes the "his team likes Leon so much but Matthew is an outcast in his own team come from?) It's so far from what I gather from old and new interviews or games and I have watched a lot, also German interviews. I really would like to like Leon, shipping them had been more fun when I didn't find his public self so jarring. What do I not see what everyone else seems to get?

Sorry for the long ask! Have a great day and thank you

first off thank you for such a thought out ask! i don't get to dive into things like this a lot outside of writing fic and it got my brain gears going.

to get right into the bulk of this ask: i get what you are saying about leon. that can be the way he comes off for sure, and look everything i'm gonna say? i'm talking out of my ass here. i don't claim to know anything about him as a person besides what's publicly presented, and i don't have much right to theorize about why he is the way that he is, but i'd be lying if i said i didn't think about it. how would i write rpf otherwise, right 💀

i think he cares a lot. and i think sometimes he gets so wrapped up in things, how things should be, how he should be performing, etc, and when it doesn't go a certain way he gets frustrated and snarky (eg, pissy comments and such). but i don't see that being bad necessarily, especially when it's seems to come from such a team oriented state of mind. which, i dont think he dislikes his team at all? i think if anything, he has a sort of blind faith in his team, and that's the only context i could see a 'superiority complex' making sense in. and yah maybe a little misplaced at times, but ultimately i think it comes from believing so fully in his team and not seeing that come to fruition. he really does not seem to care about his individual performance much at all, so how self obsessed can he be? when i think about leon i just see someone that is ultimately very passionate and committed to the game he plays. i'm also curious to know where you get the vibe that his team doesn't like him? simply because i never got that impression from any of the other oilers, they all seem like they're obsessed with him.

beyond hockey, i see a caring, sweet, kindhearted individual. anytime i see a picture or vid of him interacting with bowie, or even the things his girlfriend posts about him, the comments he leaves for people on ig, and yah of course in the way he talks/acts around connor, i see fragments of someone soooo different than the little two minute post game interviews (which, can we judge any hockey player on those? i think they all hate them dfkjgsd). it's not always something i actively go digging for or have examples of the top of my head, but i do see it, and it definitely goes into creating the version of leon that i have in my mind.

hey, and, he's a silly guy!!! please, i know the reputation is pissy and humourless, ESPECIALLY in fic, but that man is so funny. so many random offhanded comments that make me pause and then laugh. a different sense of humour but it's so there. i love the sandcastle vid from the asg last year and feel like it's a good example of that, all sunburnt and happy. also hey, big man in tune with his fear of the ocean? love that. that little vid of him dancing on the ice earlier this season, those halloween photos where he's dressed as a monkey, every time he talks to a kid. hell, seeing him in warmups and watching the way he takes time to interact fans?? loveee watching warmups but i'd never had a player actually acknowledge my existence before leon!

also i really enjoy his personality on the ice, i like the rat behaviour and the sassy comments that he makes to other players/refs, i like the bitch moves, and i like his hockey too. i think his game is dependable and like you said skillful, and while maybe not the most creative, the sureness and the technical aspect it is hot to me. so my thoughts on everything are probably skewed in that regard.

anyways this was just a whole lot of rambling about why i find him interesting, endearing even, but i understand the perception you have. i don't like some players that other people love, just cause i cant see what they see. and honestly that's sometimes just the way it is! if you don't like leon, maybe u just don't like him and thats fine.

disclaimer that i have only been on hockeyblr for a couple years, and really didn't spare many thoughts for leon til the beginning of the 22/23 season. truthfully i'm hardly the person to ask about leon imo, but of course i have thoughts anyways! if someone else with more knowledge reads my bit of rambling here, please feel free to chime in and add your voice to this!

and side note, ofc, i have to touch on this bc who would i be if i'm not one to talk about matthew; in the way of m.tkachuk, i think that in the early days of mattdrai it was maybe a fair take away during his time with the flames (minus the woobifying). even though he was loved so much here and had some fucking times, and i think the team was mostly good to him (player wise if not regarding management, that is), i see such a stark difference now that he's on the panthers. he seems much happier and more confident, and obviously he's clicking with the cats on another level, and i do see a shift in how he's been portrayed in fics since tbh.

[laesas]

did you ever make a post about pete not liking tankhun ? i know you mentioned it a few times in your tags but i don't remember seeing a post. (i share your opin ions.)

I definitely toyed with the idea of meta or a gifset but I didn't ever make a full post! I love unrequited love and I ESPECIALLY love the extremely rare platonic version which Tankhun and Pete absolutely nail in my opinion!

There are loads of moments where Pete's smile drops around Tankhun very quickly, or he insults Tankhun behind his back. Instead of laughing things off like Arm and Pol, he almost has a wincing fear-response to Tankhun, which we don't really see at all from the other bodyguards.

I think that Tankhun likes to think of himself as being close friends with his bodyguards, and he does genuinely show a lot of open affection for Pete and eventually concern for his safety. But I think ultimately for Pete, Tankhun is just a part of Pete's job, and over time resentment has built up until he thinks of Tankhun as one of the *worst* parts of it. I definitely don't think he resents Tankhun enough to hurt or endanger him, but that's about as far as it goes, there's certainly very little love there.

Something about that dynamic is just particularly brilliant, especially when combined with Pete's eventual defection from Tankhun's side to Vegas'. He chooses a man who has beaten and tortured him over a man who showers him in affection and throws parties on his return.

I utterly adore Tankhun but I think as a character that's grown up in a gilded cage, he doesn't really understand that what Pete needs is a sense of his own autonomy rather than being dragged to "fun" "lets cheer up Pete" parties that Tankhun has demanded on his behalf. At least with Vegas he *chose* to go back, he handed Vegas the ropes, let him lock him back up again. Even before he develops feelings for Vegas, Pete has clearly felt like a subhuman pet for Tankhun and the main family for a long, long time and I think ironically Vegas acknowledging Pete's humanity is the tipping point for him.

I think even without their nascent romantic love as a factor, Pete would always choose Vegas. Because despite the threat of suffering, he offers a sense of freedom that Tankhun's gilded cage does not. It all makes for an incredibly interesting betrayal, and makes Pete choosing Vegas over Tankhun all the more pointed. By choosing to be Vegas' pet, he chooses to be human.

[faebriel]

let’s be honest—have you thought about a c!Niki Spider-Man au

I HAVEN'T BEFORE BUT I AM NOW ANON !!!

c!niki spiderman au is so interesting.....disclaimer i'm not a comics expert so i'm just kicking around ideas. BUT FASCINATING IDEAS THEY ARE !!! i think out of every type of superhero there is, she would really like being the friendly neighbourhood variety. she's not in it for the glory but she likes being able to stick up for people and help people, and spider powers give her a really powerful opportunity to do that.

on the flipside, though......i feel like c!niki is the type of character who would be hit very hard by the loss and hardship that comes with being a superhero. niki thrives when she's in a safe, supportive environment, but when she's isolated and put through shit, it gets harder for her to keep her integrity - very key to the story of a superhero! especially if a la the new spider movie tragedy is seen as something embedded in her story. i don't really see her bouncing back from her "uncle ben moment" easily at all - everything is fine, everything is great, until it isn't. and she's spiderman (spiderwoman, i guess?), everything was fine, why isn't it still fine, it's not fair, it's not fair it's not fair. and so on. the part of me that loooves a messy c!niki character study is very much reaching for that kind of loss of heroism in her.........being a hero is hard. being spiderwoman is hard. and what does niki get out of it? some people love her, sure. but others hate her. maybe something really bad happens - it's pretty much the nature of any spiderman to be framed for something awful - and a lot of people hate her.

it's easier to lash out. and to not be a hero at all - whether that's a matter of going full villain/anti-hero, or just hanging up the suit and Refusing to put it back on for months on end. maybe she moves away. maybe she tries to throw her friend's little brother off of a building. shit happens.

and maybe she makes some good friends and finds herself her team and she feels better about herself and eventually spiderwoman makes her grand re-debut. that can happen too.

some assorted thoughts:

not sure if this is a "spiderniki is the only superhero" universe or there are more of them out there.....much to consider.

niki has a sweet-to-fraught relationship with local knight-esque figure puffy (whether she's a For Real superhero or a civilian with a strong moral compass, that's up to you) that increasingly gets more and more strained as spiderniki struggles to stay on the hero path. as if going through a villain arc wasn't stressful enough

i think the OG l'manberg crowd would really look up to superheroes. i think they'd find spiderniki super cool. they're not in the know but whenever they rave about the local superheroine niki gets quietly very pleased with herself :]

i'm trying so fucking hard not to be the c!rainduo guy about this but: imagine, if you will, trying-to-make-himself-a-villain-but-it's-just-not-sticking wilbur against trying-to-be-a-hero-but-it's-all-so-much niki. imagine it please

niki makes her own suit :]

thinking about niki's ravine....not sure how that would shape in. something like niki hangs up the suit (or..cough....rebrands to something less-than-heroic) and empties out whatever little shed she was keeping her stuff in. but people don't stop needing help, even when spiderniki doesn't feel like helping anymore. and instead of being where niki operates as a superhero, she learns how to just operate as a good person, a person who can help people and receive help in turn.............somewhere where she can learn how to bake again.

okay unrelated to that last point i'm still thinking about c!rainduo now sorry

[shishikusas]

What do you think Shikyou's voice sounds like?

i feel like she'd have a deeper voice, possibly a bit husky. to compare to a vocaloid, maybe lily? or a slightly deeper version of makima from chainsaw man

[i-2hoon]

https://www.tumblr.com/i-2hoon/751730271029723136/can-u-write-hcs-for-subenha-and-their-first-time?source=share

HII I'M THE ONE WHO REQUESTED THIS!!! AND IT'S SO GOOD, UR REALLY FREAKING GOOD! jw's section had me melting ngl, it's so precious :( i would love to see a small drabble of it written (+ hoon's if u could!)

and pls take ur time on requests, i bet there's a lot coming ur way! just know ur doing so well! welcoming u w all the love ☹️☝️🎀🎀

hi hi anon, thank you so much for the recommendation!

jungle bike 𐔌ㅤ p.sh

pairings ᱖ sub!bottom!sunghoon x dom!top!male!reader

warnings ᱖ explicit content, loss of virginity, endless teasing, established relationships, degradation. for a first time, this is far from sweet.

notes ᱖ hi hi anon hello! thank you so much for this ask and others! unfortunately, i know you requested jungwon, however i do not feel experienced enough in writing him to write a full drabble/story yet, i really do apologize! but i certainly will in the future

"would you just shut the fuck up?"

an annoyed threat slipped from your gritted teeth as you shot your boyfriend a nearly deadly glare, but you didnt get the reaction you wanted as always. instead, the other man seemed to only eye you up and down with a teasing expression. you saw that expression quite often: it was one that you wished you could just slap right off him. however, the situation in which you were watching him was much different than the usual.

ah, right, he was under you, and—pardon the vulgar language—with your fingers knuckle deep in his ass nonetheless. yet he still had the nerve to act like this; a cocky smirk spread across his face and a sultry look within his half lidded gaze. for someone so confident and so sure of himself like this, he certainly looked like a total

"slut," you muttered to yourself, your gaze flickering to where two of your fingers disappeared into him to prep him. he raised his eyebrow at the insult.. but something about it caused his stomach to churn in a sweet way. "how romantic, calling your boyfriend a slut the first time you fuck him," he mocked you, a soft hiss escaping his lips being the thing that cut him off as you managed to add a third finger.

"its because youre looking and acting like one," you narrowed your eyes at him once again while trying to gauge his reactions; curling your fingers to hit one spongey spot and ultimately causing him to curse and arch his back off the bed. "haah— fuck—" he cursed, his nails digging into the nape of your neck to ground himself, "you cant say anything, youre the one fingering me right now," he was quick to shoot back.

"and youre the one taking it, so shut the fuck up," repeating your statement from earlier, you deemed him prepped enough to pull your fingers out. despite there not being much of a size or strength difference you still managed to pry his arm from your neck and manhandle him to lay on his stomach. you could hear him whine at the loss of something filling him: he really was a whore, wasnt he? well, a virgin whore, at least. it was pretty easy to clock that he hadnt done this before, judging by the way he would writhe and curse with just a single touch. not that you were complaining at all. in fact, the way that you were the one going to break him and his innocence down little by little seemed to subconsciously turn you on, but you werent focused on that at the moment.

you pulled him up by his hips, causing him to try to protest but his complaints fell onto deaf ears. for a moment you had to freeze, admiring this sight of your boyfriend face down and ass up for you. fuck, you thought as you reached over to the nightstand to grab your phone. you couldnt help but snap a picture from your point of view, watching how his ears turned red at the sound of the camera.

"what the fuck?"

"for later," you mumbled, tossing the phone to the side haphazardly. moving to lean forward and press your chest to his back, you nipped at his ear and perched your hands on his waist, "you look so fucking pretty like this, and like a total whore," you whispered. the way he flushed wouldve made people think you were telling him sweet nothings rather than degrading him, and that was adorable in itself.

despite the heated nature of the situation, you still knew you needed to ask for permission, "you ready? you know you can tap out at any time," it wad subtle reassurance but it was enough to cause sunghoon to relax, if you could judge by the way he untensed in your hold. "mhm.. im sure, and im ready— just fuck me already," he complained, digging his nails into the white sheets below him. his cheek was already pressed into it and his eyes were closed tightly: he seemed nervous.

and you knew the best way to keep those thoughts out of his head.

"as you wish."

[everythingwasnormalhere]

concept: trans tfbw clyde period fic (i am rotating this idea so much in my head rn, bloodsucker experiencing blood loss oh the cruel irony)

LMAOOO RIP THE POOR GUY????? 😭😭😭

i mean i HAVE several fic ideas in which i torture donovan with period pains (which gets me through them myself lmao sorry clyde ily boo), but i hadnt thought of them with mosquito, hmmmmmmm

FYS au mosquito bc him<3 ok so, little guy probably was aware of his transness since he was like 10, but mosquito bite didn't happen till he was 12, and he could only transition after FP paid for it - 13yo by that time (obviously, FP were very willing to help out, why wouldn't they? another way in which they can control him)

BUT, because they didn't want to fuck up with his precious powers, they wouldn't do anything to his blood (no hormones for you clyde), nor to his uterus - his blood-sucking powers came from his body's new natural need to keep eggs warm, but as he didn't really get eggs, he just needed to drink blood to survive; FP were scared bottom surgery would mess that up.

Which means, poor little guy gets periods for so much longer than he'd like.

Clyde's been taught to get over pain, but he literally Can't. He needs to curl up in a ball, drink at the very least double the amount of blood he typically does, and if he stands up he'll more likely than not pass the fuck out. Very in pain, very much a pain for his teammates.

(hi increased period pain because of EDS<3)

He gets whiney as fuck, and for a bunch of guys trained as human weapons, that is very much annoying. Not like Mosquito isn't typically annoying to them, but even more so. Give the boy bottom surgery pls he needs it so bad 😭

FP tried to train him to force himself to ignore the whole periods thing, but after several years, it was decided it'd be easier to accomodate him (thanks Malkinson for convincing them ilysm<3)

ANYWAY hope you enjoyed this train wreck of a post which i did not proof-read AND THANKS FOR THE ASK love u forever anon<3

[ancharan]

Op just wanted to say thank u for your entirely free billford monsterfucker comic. It looks like it took so much work and I'm enjoying it immensely! I'm excited to see where things go 👀. Also, I saw you were thinking of posting the full thing on Ao3 when it's done and I think that's a great idea! I'd love to read it there all together when it's finished. Hope you have a beautiful day as the fandoms strongest soldier 🫡

anon i cant charge people money for this, this is a public service

(also i fucked up the formatting, if i sent this to a printer itd come out blurry)

(if i hadnt done that, i might have offered it as a potential zine available for purchase)

(if ppl are interested, i might do one in the future??)

(idk just a thought)

[1eos]

Hallo mx kendra im the anon who asked for a job offer manifestation in exchange for sweaty action movie leo, i had no luck since . But then realised last night i hadnt been focussing on my end of the deal, so i sat and wrote down pen and paper for the universe to send energy towards Leo (specified full name) to be casted sweatily in an action movie for you. And lo and behold. I got a job the next day. Thank you so much for the cosmic help, and we should be getting some good leo news soon as well

THIS IS SOIOAUKJGLO;PHAOP;AK,.MKJAHK,L;PHL. i yelled. first of all CONGRATS. the universe holding the job behind her back until u seriously thought of leo dodging bullets is so funny but also so real 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 this is truly one of my favorite manifestation testimonials like the timing of it!

[kalofi]

i really love your reincarnation fic/idea, read it like three times ❤️

THANK YOU AAHHH this actually reminded me of it bc i hadnt thought about it in sooo long but im honestly quite invested as well i just have no experience writing long multi-chapter fics so its intimidating but i would so love to make it into an actual story. been thinking about it so hard bc u sent this thank you thank you for bringing it to my mind again im hoping i can find motivation to figure out more of the sequence of events, how i want characters to be introduced/what theyre doing, how the conflict gets resolved etc. once again im highly inexperienced so who knows how that’ll play out but man am i thinking about it. man.

(the fic anon is referring to)

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

hi! i sent in an ask awhile ago about lgbtq struggles and im just now getting around to asking about it i hope thats ok! no tws

so my issue is that i think i might be genderfluid because i keep having phases where i feel masc and then i feel fem and each time i just. hadnt thought "oh i might actually be genderfluid" and i just thought my gender like, changed? for good? like i thought i realised i was trans when i was masc for about a year or longer. so i came out n told people to use he him pronouns for me but just recently ive felt like a girl and at first it was really hard to accept because i didnt want to let go of my transness because i had identified with it for so long. but i guess i sorta dont even have to let it go all the way? because i dont feel female or like strictly a girl, id label myself genderfae right now. but anyways, my problem is that everytime i have a phase of feeling like a different gender it feels so permanent. and right now, i just feel so comfortable in my sapphic genderfae identity and i really dont want it to change again. do you know if this is actually a genderfluid experience or if i was just figuring myself out until now? or do you have any advice or tips? anything would be appreciated.

im so sorry, this is the maybe-genderfluid anon again, i forgot to add something to my ask! yk how i said that i felt sapphic and genderfae currently? what i really mean by that is that i feel like a lesbian. i cant see myself being with a man or being a man too, for that matter. but im scared that that's gonna change sometime. i dont know if it would be right for me to identify as a lesbian given my history of genderfluidity and the fact that it feels permanent each time it happens - like now, sure it FEELS permanent but i dont actually know that it is. i want it to be, but i dont know. im very confused. sorry for the second ask but thats probably the main problem. thank u in advance!

Hi anon,

Like I said in this ask, I think it's important to consider that on some level, identity always changes over time, even for people who identify as cis their entire life. There is no pressure to label yourself and your gender, as it can often be a very complex and fluid concept that may be hard to put any one label on, and that's okay. It's also important to consider that identity, including gender, can change over time, and that's okay too. Just because you no longer resonate with being trans or masc doesn't necessarily mean you were never either of these things. Discovering ourselves is an ongoing process. However, it's also perfectly valid to find comfort in labeling or naming your own experiences.

Part of discovering and finding ways to describe yourself sometimes involves experimenting with labels. I think of it as going to a clothing store and trying on different clothes. Some might be too bright, dark, big, small, and some might be passable for a little while until it just doesn't look right and you go shopping for more clothes, and all of that is okay. I think there's a lot of stigma that comes with trying to experiment with labels and find one that describes you accurately, because society tends to have a hard time respecting a change in identity. Sometimes this can influence the struggle to make these changes publicly.

While in the grand scheme of things your identity may shift various times, I think it's very natural and common to resonate with the gender you currently identify with so strongly that it feels permanent. I can understand how frustrating or confusing it might be to feel so sure that this is a permanent identity, only for it to shift over time. But I think it's worth considering that no identity has to be permanent, and it doesn't necessarily have to be a loss or disappointment if or when it eventually changes.

The way I see it is, if you identify as a lesbian now and in the future you find that you're attracted to men, that's okay. I think it's still fair to say that at one point you were a lesbian, etc. Like I said, discovering yourself is an ongoing process. However you want to identify, as long as it is in good faith (doesn't do harm), is valid. It's ultimately up to you to describe yourself and your identity, as you know yourself best.

I hope I could help, and know that we're here if you need anything.

-Bun

[asahicore]

I just had to reply, because I'm so excited, I have no one to talk about kdramas...

I've seen hye-sun in a few kdramas before, but her acting in this one is getting to me in a whole another level; the way you can see and feel her yearning from her expression to her body language, ugh, it's just to good. I also love ji-eum x cho-won interactions, I'm so looking forward for the moment she calls her unnie again.

OMG!! I need to talk about the scene with "her mom" (iykwim). I was so excited, like, the moment was so precious and so heartbreaking, but it just worked that way. Ig love hurting myself. 🥲 I just, Idk, I want to see ji-eum happy with those of her 18th life, 'cause I get the deep affection she developed for them.

please, I'm begging for the writers to let me have a happy ending in this one.

you're right, tho. kdramad do tend to be like that, like, I had the same conflict with itaewon class; saeroyi knowing exactly when things would happen for him was tripping me out.

btw, you don't have to feel sorry for not watching the recs. kdramas can be a lot of time consuming, especially when you don't know korean and can't watch it at the same time you're doing something else. I know the struggle. 😪

— ☕️! anon

omg u can talk to me about kdramas anytime i love talking about them !!!

oh my god i hadnt even thought about chowon calling jieum unnie again.. gonna make me cry for sure.. i cant wait 5 hours anymore i need the episode now i have a feeling this weekend's eps will be when chowon figures it out 😭 and i def need to look into hye-sun's dramas!!! shes so good at subtle expressions ugh

that scene with her mom... dont even. i was ugly crying as it was happening and when it turned out to be not real i was DEVASTATED. WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO US??? same, i just want to see her reunited with her 18th life family is that so much to ask... and im also so happy we get to see snippets of her other previous lives, theyre so interesting, icb they made her the inventor of soju thats so insane 😭

i have a feeling it will be a happy ending though!!! like theres so many soft vibes and you can already tell seo-ha is warming up to her so i'm sure things will go their way, otherwise i will riot <3 and oh my god, i did not like itaewon class and that was one of the reasons!! saeroyi was this perfect guy that always either had things going his way or knew how to get out of them every single time lol

thank u<33 and yes omg i wanna be able to understand korean better so i can multitask while watching them 😭 for dramas that are a bit slow ive just started watching them in 1,25x or 1,5x speed bahahhah

[shesnake]

hi deah hope yr good ! theres a new-ish contemporized adaptation podcast of sherlock holmes stories (like, the actual stories but in our current world with watson as a true crime like podcaster) called sherlock & co if you hadnt heard about it! its not necessarily obsessing-about-it good but its p fun if u have time to kill or wanna listen to smth while working/doing other stuff so I thought Id share :-)

omg thank you 🥰 hope you're doing well anon

[sankttealeaf]

Hello there - I was wondering when did you first start liking durgetash? How did you get the inspo for your story? ps Im a huge fan ❤

hi anon!! thank u!! <3

the thing that dragged me headfirst into the depths of durgetash hell was the prayer for forgiveness! i went into the dark urge playthrough knowing very little! (started rue's run in early september but only got around to actually playing her in early october! (act 3 was lagging so bad on my first playthrough i needed to jump ship to simpler times)

seeing other peoples interpretations of their durge & gortash got me thinking a little more about rue & gortash and what they couldve been like! i went into rue's playthrough knowing i was going to romance gale and went woah, theres some similarities between the two there. rue has a type!

(fun fact: my first tav playthrough & the beginnings of my durgetash era overlapped so when i got to meet gortash as my tav, cassiopeia, i was only slightly taken in by him. did not trust him at all, though. stupid man)

i think i love the tragedy of it all. no matter what relationship your durge has with gortash, its still one of closeness. and to have someone you worked hard with ripped from you, only to return now wanting to destroy everything youve made? thats gotta hurt.

as for my fic it kind of started as a series of one shots i started writing, never really with the intent to publish them! i wanted to work out how rue acted before the tadpoling and how different she was then!

the original plan was just a collection of moments shared between rue and gortash throughout their time together. back then rue was still called rue, i hadnt given her another name to further separate her life before & after being tadpoled. i also really wanted to make little letters and notes that you find in the game to go along with the writing. however i only ever made gortash's initial request for a meeting.

(as u can see below. i thought it was a cool concept. no idea how i wouldve fully executed it though)

then it sort of spiralled from there! what if rue and enver were friends as kids? what if they keep finding each other over and over again? what if they always fall to the same fate? i love tragic romances, friendships that are doomed to fail, relationships that can only end one way, so it was very fun to explore all this with them!!

the title was originally a title from a one shot i started writing about them. i think the phrase "let sleeping dogs lie" is very them - after all, why disturb what is a peaceful alliance? why ruin it by admitting feelings or saying words they shouldnt? also dog imagery & rue go hand in hand (despite me saying she's cat coded)

i had key events planned from the start that i wanted to happen, the main thing being how rue lets down her guard over the course of their friendship & how that becomes her downfall!

i also wanted to use this as a way to not only explore rue and gortash, but rue and orin, too!! it meant i could write in their povs, get into their brains and work out why they do what they do! i love villainous characters and finding out the root cause behind their actions (im currently running a curse of strahd dnd game and did the exact thing for strahd - writing up his motivations and intentions to give me better access into his headspace & why he acts like he does!)

at the start i never really intented to publish it on ao3. i added the little prologue after writing the second chapter, and then i decided to bite the bullet and post it! i made this account to share my writing, why not do that!!

im still a little in shock at how many people have enjoyed reading it & especially how many people love rue. ive never written any oc x canon before so it was a little scary putting her out there for the world to see!! sometimes i get that little voice in my head that goes "gr. youre being cringe" and i have to bap it away before it can rot my brain. im allowed to have silly characters and make them kiss other characters - no one can stop me!!

this got a little longer than i intended, but thanks anon!! <3 i hope this has been a lil insightful about the behind the scene of my very chaotic brain behind this fic! its all ive been thinking about for 6ish months now (oh gods)

[mcl38]

why did i think u were british this whole time. i just now noticed the romanian and i have been following u for an embarrassingly long time. omg i'm so sorry.

i was going to ask u if the UK is really this puritanical bc like. i was raised by some right-wingers who taught me that if i even danced with someone i was not married to, i would spend eternity burning in hell, and i still couldn't rlly bring myself to care abt a guy in his mid-20s making sex jokes enough to be offended abt it. but i mean u are not british so that doesn't matter now.

this also begs the question why are ppl getting moral/life advice from multimillionaires. like if lando gets a STD, he just goes and gets treatment. if an american gets a STD, they go bankrupt. u rlly have to put how promiscuous u can be in perspective of ur circumstances unless u want gangrenous genitals from chlamydia. also like if ur george russell or lance stroll or max verstappen or— and u physically harm someone, all u have to do is issue an apology. if ur quite literally a normal person, ur going to jail for that shit like u cannot behave like a multimillionaire under any circumstances unless u are also a multimillionaire bc one of three things will happen: 1) jail, 2) bankruptcy, 3) the end.

sorry for making u read my incoherent thoughts again but i know u appreciate a good landogate. i just don't really get this one. like wow local man in his twenties cracks nsfw jokes w his friends and experiences horniness. did these people never become traumatized by omegle. bc this isn't abnormal behavior for a man in his 20s spotted in the wild online. it's actually quite tame.

hi anon! so like first off ur not entirely wrong abt the british thing - i am romanian but ive been living in the uk for like 4 years now, u mightve seen a reference to that and assumed i was english. but bc ive been living there for a while i can quite confidently say that no, english people are not generally puritanical at all, much less than in america anyways. maybe theres more value put on decorum and politeness but i generally associate religiously-fuelled prudishness with american protestantism lmao. anyways

my thing is ive just come back from a vacation where i had no roaming so i genuinely have no idea whether ive missed smth major lmao. from what i could tell the thing ur talking abt is lando making dirty jokes on stream and ppl allegedly getting upset at that (??) which unless thats all been happening on twitter and i just havent seen it bc i deleted the app (god bless) (likely), the whole 'drama' seems to stem from one clickbait article by a clickbait sports news publication that seems to b based in india rather than the uk. was this abt the way landos (british) friends responded to him on stream? bc from what i could tell they were also participating in the moaning and calling themselves daddy activities. otherwise like what predominantly british public did u see upset? its quite odd as a thing to happen

not saying this isnt a pattern w lando tho - back in 2020 idk if u were around but if u were, u should rmbr how dire the situation was. basically anyone who'd make a sex joke around lando was essentially corrupting god's most darlingest little baby boy, how dare they. theres a certain amount of infantilisation around lando that thank god isnt happening as much anymore but maybe its reared its ugly head again. or, if ppl r getting mad at him for Corrupting His Audience (if theyre getting mad at all - again ive only seen ppl saying it was totally fine and funny), then this just represents his full flip into the whore part of the madonna whore dichotomy. the same reason miley cyrus twerking at the 2013 vmas wouldve been so much more scandalous than another female singer that hadnt previously had a child-friendly teen star image.

i dont rly know how to address the whole life advice paragraph - i rly dont think lando talking abt a girl character in fortnite shooting cream out of her palms or propellers or smth is exactly life advice. lando specifically has quite a complicated relationship w his position as a role model and he often worries abt the 'advice' he gives ppl - smth thats also like, true, hes a v sheltered 23 year old who lacks a lot of normal life experiences bc his professional career basically started around age 7. idrk what to say abt the whole std thing bc like not only have i not heard lando talk actual details abt his potential promiscuity beyond a couple vague jokes, but also bc ive never had to think abt going into debt over chlamydia doamne pazeste. also like idk if i push someone nothing happens but if max verstappen does it on an international broadcast he has to do community service for it so 🤷🏻‍♀️ u win some u lose some. not rly sure of the point u wanted to make if im totally frank lol

tldr like yeah f1 drivers r mainly irresponsible athletes in an extreme sport and u shouldnt model ur life after them. but also op ur life sounds terrifying like 'jail / bankrupcy / the end' sounds like either the way US capitalism works (big up the prison industrial complex) or oscar wilde's new years resolutions in january 1895 lmao

[agardenintheshire]

could let the dice solve it, dc 15 wis saving throw and if you make it runsi has enough self-control not to use the spell slot :) either way, fully support her.

first off thank u anon for ur input APRECIATE IT HELPING A GAL OUT i hadnt even thought abt letting the dice decide!

SECOND i read this n was like well damn runsi has a +7 to Wis that changes the odds quite significantly. and yet what did i roll?

a FIVE. so it is Decided. runsi shall be angry and vengeful.