#th...the fambly...

[izabellwit]

literally no one is doing it like lilia vanrouge

[solobodor]

the full fambly !!! + Recent IEYTD doodle dump, i changed my fabby design again, she lost her arm, it detached itselft from her and is now running around... its a perfect vessel for Zor's voice , call it the Zor crab ...

MECH SOLARIS i need to design her big mech .. already posted the second to last in another doodle dump but oh well ..

in my interpretation, Zor is human th like the handler and Roxana but never show their true self.. at least now now Juniper and Fabby are humanoid while, solaris, hivemind and Phoenix are creatures !

[simcardiac-arrested]

can weg et some more FAM for the ahah, f a m in th eback???

*i am shot dead*

always ready for some famble @medi-bee

[ayatoscupid]

minor out of context 3.3 aq spoilers (not kuni related!!) and gushing under cut!

yes i already finished it *cries*

it’s bc of me btw lol [i get booed off the stage]

BUT THIS WAS SUCH A NICE SURPRISE TO SEE IN THE AQ I ALMOST STARTWD CRYING AT THE MENTION OF HIM 😭😭😭 I JUST MISS HIM SO MUCH

and god this is SO damn cute…���. yato doesn’t usually have the time to eat at home but whenever he gets the opportunity he always prefers to eat there bc he just loves home cooking so much…… she says he’s “so fond of home comforts” that’s just so so so cute. THAT’S SO CUTE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH home and family really is everything to him and i just love that about him. he has so much love in his heart

and god i love these three (yato th//oma and yaka) so much…… the ina fambly trio… they make me so happy :((( they’re so close to each other n it makes me so proud of the siblings to feel so comfortable in their lives after everything they’ve been thru.. they deserve it so much n i’m glad they have such a good support like th//oma to help them 💙

and ofc my oc xue yin is a part of this too in my head. yato xue yin th//oma and yaka, the y//ashiro comm team comp LMAO (fun fact: xue yin’s kit is made so he works perfectly in bloom and burgeon teams 😚)

anw i love my camellia, my prince, the ocean waves to my moonlight, my lord and my little tapioca pearl, i love him so so SO much and i’m counting down the days until we can finally reunite and be together 💙💙 (aka me finally getting him on my main account LMAO)

i hope we get to see him in the upcoming festival 🥹 that’d be a DREAM come true!!! ik he doesn’t make public appearances bc that’s his dear sister’s job, but i hope we get to talk to him at least 🙏

ok GOD. i love him so much he makes me so happy. ok gushing done 😭

[darkfinch]

i am sick so i am thinking. abt quinn being sick. naturally.

and eliot stirring a big pot of Healing Borscht like "this is it the most selfless thing ive ever done. my most noble sacrifice. everything smells like beets and i am in hell and yet i will soldier on, bravely undeterred—"

[c-kiddo]

I feel like during the winter, Caduceus gets super thick fur and the Clays help each other brush out their shedding fur for the spring. The last thing they want to happen is to find fur in their tea and start a whole fight over who's fur it is

aaa yea ;o;... im a cad-grows-a-winter-coat truther.. he gets very fluffy n he shed a lot when the nein were in nicodranas and then on the sea. but yea, also i headcanon that brushing out their fur is a ritual of sorts for most firbolgs bc clans and tribes and families all tend to be very tactile.. the act of touching is very important to them, sacred to some :’3 

also i have a funny image in my head of the clays at th beginning of spring, and constance shooing the kids out into the garden to brush them all down before they make a mess (or get fur in their tea)

[tezzbot]

sobs weeps cries im emotional about them dang apples again

[mysmorgasbordoffantabulosa]

Polari

Definition:

A form of slang incorporating Italianate words, rhyming slang, and Romani, used originally as a kind of secret language by people in theatres, fairgrounds, markets, etc. and adopted by some gay people in the 20th century.

Example words:

acdc, bibi - bisexual arva - to have sex (from Italian chiavare, to screw) aunt nell - listen! aunt nells - ears aunt nelly fakes - earrings barney - a fight bat, batts, bates - shoes bitch - effeminate or passive gay man bona - good butch - masculine; masculine lesbian cackle - talk/gossip camp - effeminate (possibly from Italian campare "exaggerate, make stand out") (possibly from the phrase 'camp follower' those itinerants who followed behind the men in uniform/highly decorative dress) carsey, karsey, khazi - toilet cartes - penis (from Italian – cazzo) charpering omi - policeman charver - sexual intercourse chicken - young man clevie - vagina corybungus - backside, posterior cottage - a public lavatory used for sexual encounters (public lavatories in British parks and elsewhere were often built in the style of a Tudor cottage) cottaging - seeking or obtaining sexual encounters in public lavatories Dilly boy - a male prostitute, from Piccadilly boy Dilly, the Piccadilly, a place where trolling went on dinari money (Latin denarii was the 'd' of the pre decimal penny) dish - buttocks dona - woman (perhaps from Italian donna or Lingua Franca dona) drag - clothing ecaf - face (backslang i.e. words writting backward) eek/eke - face (abbreviation of ecaf) ends - hair[6] esong, sedon - nose (backslang) fambles - hands fantabulosa - fabulous/wonderful (e.g. my tumblr!!!) farting crackers - trousers feele omi / feely omi - young man fungus - old man/beard hoofer - dancer HP or homy palone - effeminate gay man irish - wig (from rhyming slang, "Irish jig") jubes - breasts khazi - toilet, also spelt carsey lallies / lylies - legs, sometimes also knees (as in "get down on yer lallies") lallie tappers - feet lilly - police (Lilly Law) manky - worthless, dirty (from Italian mancare – "to be lacking") meese - plain, ugly (from Yiddish mieskeit, in turn from Hebrew מָאוּס repulsive, loathsome, despicable, abominable) meshigener - nutty, crazy, mental (from Yiddish 'meshugge', in turn from Hebrew מְשֻׁגָּע crazy) meshigener carsey - church mince - walk affectedly/campy mollying - involved in the act of sex naff - awful, dull, hetero nishta nothing[6] ogle look admiringly ogles eyes oglefakes glasses omi man (from Romance) omi-palone effeminate man, or homosexual onk nose (cf "conk") orbs eyes orderly daughters police oven mouth (nanti pots in the oven = no teeth in the mouth) palare / polari pipe - telephone ("talk pipe") park, parker - give palone - woman (Italian paglione – "straw mattress"; cf. old Cant hay-bag – "woman"); also spelled "polony" in Graham Greene's 1938 novel Brighton Rock palone-omi - lesbian pots - teeth remould - sex change rozzer - policeman[11] riah / riha - hair (backslang) riah zhoosher - hairdresser rough trade - a working class or blue collar sex partner or potential sex partner; a tough, thuggish or potentially violent sex partner scarper - to run off (from Italian scappare, to escape or run away or from rhyming slang Scapa Flow, to go) sharpy - policeman (from — charpering omi) sharpy polone - policewoman slap makeup so - homosexual (e.g. "Is he 'so'?") stimps - legs stimpcovers - stockings, hosiery TBH (to be had) - rospective sexual conquest tootsie trade - sex between two passive homosexuals (as in: 'I don't do tootsie trade') trade - sex, sex-partner, potential sex-partner troll - to walk about (esp. looking for trade) vada / varder - to see (from Italian — dialect vardare = guardare – look at) vera (lynn) - gin vogue - cigarette (from Lingua Franca fogus – "fire, smoke") vogueress - female smoker zhoosh - style hair, tart up, mince (cf. Romani zhouzho – "clean, neat") zhoosh our riah — style our hair

Example phrases:

Omies and palones of the jury, vada well at the eek of the poor ome who stands before you, his lallies trembling.

taken from "Bona Law", one of the Julian and Sandy sketches from Round The Horne, written by Barry Took and Marty FeldmanTranslation: "Men and women of the jury, look well at the face of the poor man who stands before you, his legs trembling."

So bona to vada...oh you! Your lovely eek and your lovely riah.

taken from "Piccadilly Palare", a song by MorrisseyTranslation: "So good to see...oh you! Your lovely face and your lovely hair."

As feely ommes...we would zhoosh our riah, powder our eeks, climb into our bona new drag, don our batts and troll off to some bona bijou bar. In the bar we would stand around with our sisters, vada the bona cartes on the butch omme ajax who, if we fluttered our ogle riahs at him sweetly, might just troll over to offer a light for the unlit vogue clenched between our teeth.

taken from Parallel Lives, the memoirs of renowned gay journalist Peter BurtonTranslation: "As young men...we would style our hair, powder our faces, climb into our great new clothes, don our shoes and wander/walk off to some great little bar. In the bar we would stand around with our gay companions, look at the great genitals on the butch man nearby who, if we fluttered our eyelashes at him sweetly, might just wander/walk over to offer a light for the unlit cigarette clenched between our teeth."

Some strides for the omi with the naff riah

From the Are You Being Served? episode "The Old Order Changes", where Captain Peacock asks Mr Humphries to get "trousers for the fellow with the unstylish hair."

[askjonesysinclair]

Hello Jonesy. Have you ever traveled with your family?

ubuyaaeha!!!! jonesy go place with she fambly all th time

hmm,,... mama dont go places msusch.. but sometime mama brign jonesy in her yelo toe truck. jonesy dont kno why it call that cuz there no toes

somtime stinky bobrign her pto the lake or on looooooooong drive in truck to!

meat leser jonesy favrite to drive wiht thogh...,, he truck so stink and she love to lick it. meat leser lauhg becuz jonesy lick the seat jonesy lick th tyre jonesy lick th windwow..........tase an smel so good.

someteim dead body

but........mosly jonesy famly dont go many place.??? stay in ambrose to watch and make shure no intrudor :0)

[fistsoflightning]

08 - calm waters beyond this squall

adroit: having or showing skill, cleverness, or resourcefulness in handling situations; to show skill in the use of hands or mind. Tehra'ir/Jacke, 1.1k words. Post-Shadowbringers, after 5.55. Mild spoilers for 5.4 MSQ. The southern lights festival was Cyan's creation; I just got brainrot thinking about it...

The age of piracy in Limsa Lominsa is coming to a end, the old ways giving way to peace and quiet. As strange as it might be, Tehra'ir can't find it in himself to be all that upset by the changes the Admiral's made to their fair city, even if it puts the guild he grew up with in a strange flux. He still has Jacke to weather the quick storm with.

When Tehra’ir came back from the First and was freed to come home to Limsa Lominsa, he was taken completely offguard by how much the den of pirates and thieves had changed in his absence. It was still in the midst of change, with how determined Merlwyb was to run a tight ship. There had been a cove, back when Milala was still out for rogue blood, that said the age of pirates had been coming to a swift end with the new Admiral—but not even Tehra’ir thought she’d get as far as this curious peace and quiet that sweetened the sea breeze.

Even Jacke, eternally sworn to uphold the Code and keep Limsa’s dark underbelly from collapsing beneath everyone’s feet, wasn’t immune to the winds of change. Restless as ever, especially with Underfoot and V’kebbe’s new throwing dagger training that they’d been making rather extreme challenges out of with a full dinner at the Bismarck from the Stray’s pocket for whoever could find and hit all the targets first, but now he was free to take time away from his map tables and his informants to do stupid shite with Tehra’ir again. something they’d lost when Jacke became the first Rogue’s Guild captain following the Calamity.

Tehra’ir just wasn’t sure if Jacke was still adjusting or somehow losing his touch.

“Ye better get me stabbers back ‘fore the colts get their fambles on them tomorrow,” Tehra’ir said, wrapping his fingers around Jacke’s wrist as he closed his eyes. Jacke’s arm, slung over his shoulders, stopped shifting towards the small tin of Rhela’s candies in Tehra’ir’s lap. “An’ don’t think I haven’t snilched ye cloying me sweets, Captain.”

“Damn,” Jacke said, a small whistle tickling Tehra’ir’s ears. “Even with yer glazes out to sea an’ yer head all foggy, ye still don’t miss a thing. Though I’d get away with it.”

“Yer thievin’ skills are just losin’ their touch,” he mumbled, leaning his weight onto Jacke as he kept one eye open and out to the dark, glimmering sea. Not that Tehra’ir thought it was bad, mind. Just meant that it wasn’t just the pirates that were settling down into the strange new peace of Limsa’s streets. Merlwyb had probably been tapping the guild for more investigative work, rather than the old jobs of biting back stolen goods and always keeping the Code. The Krakens had their trade with the East, the Sirens had their job with the fishermen and their restaurant, and the Sisters had their ears to the ground. Rhoswen had the right of it; a life of peace and quiet really wasn’t all bad, as strange as it was to see Jacke not planning some stakeout or confrontation. “Goin’ soft, hm? Or just yer innate need t’ break the Code where ye can?”

“It’s late ‘nough for me to be gettin’ clumsy. Let yer captain have ‘is dignity, ye arse,” Jacke grumbled. He wiggled his fingers just enough to grab another peach sweet, tossing it up into the air and catching it with his mouth. Tehra’ir didn’t try to stop him—he’d just bite back what he was due later in stolen kisses, when Jacke inevitably had to drag him back to bed. “An’ maybe ye do make me a little soft. So, what’s me punishment? Goin’ to string me up like the Stray did? Push me into th’ harbor?”

Tehra’ir huffed, turning his head so that his face was mostly hidden in the crook of Jacke’s throat. “Yer punishment is t’ ask V’kebbe for another favor an’ take me on a nice date when I’m not fightin’ to keep me glazes open.”

Jacke hummed. “Well, if I’m goin’ t’ get meself torn a new one, might as well go all out,” he said, before derailing to curiously ask, “Ye have any opinion on festivals, love?”

“Haven’t been to a nice festival in half a decade, if ye recall th’ time distortion thing,” he mumbled, tail curling idly around Jacke’s waist. “The only one that could’ve been got turned into some deal with murder robots or some shite, an’ we left ‘fore planning for the other one started. One comin’ around?”

“Southern Lights. How’s a little partyin’ sound? Too much for yer delicate senses?”

Tehra’ir, despite his interest, yawned, leaning further into Jacke’s shoulder as he blinked. “Issat th’ festival with th’ baby arcanists an’ their light shows?”

When Jacke responded with a sleepy mhm and the warmth of his lips pressed to Tehra’ir’s temple, his head started conjuring up brilliant lights and glimmering seas of people behind his eyelids, the docks full of life and those floating jellyfish things he’d seen Zaya working on, before G’raha had some fun with their souls. The glittering reflections bound to stain the void-dark night sea with life and the strange shadows it would draw over all of Limsa and its white stone streets.

A few years ago, any festival would have been cause for more work, sharper eyes and ears pressed to the ground. Black marketeers liked to ply their trade when Limsa was alive and brilliant as the moon, a bit like how they worked in Ul’dah when Little Ladies’ Day rolled around, before the Songbirds and their appearances tightened up security and the seneschal business. Pirates liked to sneak their goods onto ships and steal away with bitten loot beneath the din of the regular folk partying their hearts out.

But with Merlwyb about to put the final nail in true piracy’s coffin, there weren’t as many pirates for them to go chasing after. Less need for them to be blades in the dark—though there would always be a need, never free unless black marketing, thieving, and other minute violations of the Code ceased to exist—and more time for them to be free. Navigating by their heart’s desires rather than the compass they kept.

“Sounds good.” If his gut was correct, it’d be his last taste of peace for a long, long time, with those towers draining the land’s aether and that stupid fucking Ascian whose name he couldn’t be bothered to remember going off his rocker. He didn’t even want to think about Zenos. “Yer payin’.”

Jacke shifted beneath his head, the momentary discomfort leading to Tehra’ir being shifted halfway into his captain’s lap. Not the worst thing in the world, he supposed; his back was warmer now. “Love, yer the one with a bleedin’ alchemist’s budget. Come on.”

“‘S the price ye pay for breakin’ the Code,” he teased, laughing when Jacke slumped his head onto Tehra’ir’s slightly bony shoulder and groaned. Not even the chilled sea breeze felt like it could keep him from staying here all night, here with Jacke at his side.

[captainshyguy]

SPM 4 th ask meme !

ooo hell yeah, ty! :D

Favourite character: If we’re talking strictly in game itself, I going to unfortunately say dimentio X] Fanon for him is...not my favourite though. Second favourite character: Oogh.....O chunks or Nassy...I am very biased toward Sam’s comic versions though, which is definitely influencing my answer. Least favourite character: [GLARES AT FRANCIS] The character I’m most like: God...good question? I’m never good at answering these uhhh, Peach perhaps?  Favourite pairing: All of team bleck as found fambly :3. Though I guess thats favourite dynamic and not romantic, uhhhh, Tippi and Bleck is the easy answer. Least favourite pairing: I don’t get dim*mi. I do not want to.  Favourite moment: Is there anything like the Count feeling so much love for his minions that it revitalises the pure hearts? The wedding? The immediate aftermath where you feel sad but good? Extremely gucci. Honourable mentions go to the world of nothing and Dimentio’s betratal Rating out of 10: 10/10!!! 

[arodrwho]

caduceus hcs:

knows sylvan sign language!!

learned from corrin, who is hoh

has chronic pain & crunchy bones

crunch

can make ! bread!!

but only bread. other bakings are.. questionable at best

he also learned this from corrin

in general. he is p close to corrin

if u do not have enough spice on ur food. he is judging u. quietly, but. judging u.

that’s not. how food. should be!! where are the FLAVORS what are u DOING to urself

loves,, sticking his hand in like a big ol bunch of pebbles

that’s nice

knows a lot abt mushrooms

please talk to him abt mushrooms. he has so much 2 say

walks  re a l l y  slow

partly this is out of courtesy so others can keep up, but also he’s just kinda. like that

has no idea what you just said directly to him but definitely heard the woodpecker start going to town several trees away

enthusiastic lil thing

thoughts p much always have subthoughts

sometimes subthoughts win out

often subthoughts win out

not always though

just. often

pressure.. is good!

misses heavy blanket from home

tea must be made a Certain Way

any other way. is Wrong

frumpkin is the only cat he’s ever met & he’s vry endeared by him

caleb infodumped to cad abt frumpkin once & cad was like :O!!!

caleb & cad sometimes just. infodump @ each other

caleb always asks really good followup questions

cad doesn’t always quite follow enough to ask really insightful questions like veth & beau tend to, but caleb never seems to mind his simpler ones, so that’s all right

cad hums when he’s really happy

jus a short little hum sometimes

other times it’s like. gotta hum a whole song on repeat for a while

sometimes cad gets so excited he just can’t talk

all he can do is grin & maybe fidget with his staff

sometimes sign a thing or two

cad doesn’t rly handflap but sometimes when he’s real excited, if he’s sitting, he’ll pat the ground on either side of himself real fast

pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat

he sways sometimes when he’s thinkin real deeply

reaaaal slow

sometimes when he’s anxious he’ll jus run through th somatic components for invisibility over & over & over & over & over &--

doesn’t always cast it. mostly just goes thru the motions

mostly when he does cast it it’s not on purpose. more instinct

has to be stimming at least a little bit in order to meditate

can be as small as doing sth unobtrusive w/his hands, like pressing them flat to the ground, or tangling them in grass, or folding them in a particular way for Pressure

sometimes can be obvious as swaying back n forth

or in the middle like tracing patterns in his staff

it varies

but there’s always something

probably empathys weird

possibly doesn’t empathy at all

can’t whistle!!

all his sibs can but not him

all of his fambly are disabled in some fashion or other

all.

likes! flowers! in ! his hair!

braided in is nicest

he’d happily braid veth’s hair for her if she ever asked, but she’s never asked, & he’s never offered

doesn’t want to intrude on her & caleb’s thing

gender?? oh no thank you :)

doesn’t need one of those he’s good but thank u :)

balance? oh, no. no no no. none of that, actually

that’s (partly) what the staff is for u see

extremely good at hide & seek, even without going invisible

which is good bc that’s not much of an advantage anyway, given they can all do it

giant nerd full of cooking facts

cooking is the biggest special interest. just. the biggest. ever

the wildmother is also a big special interest but. in a different way u know

hard to explain precisely how, just. different

loves rain

a lot. it’s sensory Very Good

to conclude:

yes

[catboymoments]

hey i'm a trans guy n i've flip-flopped back n forth fr years over whether or not i want bio kids bt seein th famblies u draw w pregnant trans guys is so heartwarming n sweet!! i love it!! i love u !!!!! 💖💖💖💖💖

Thank u!!

[fagderolo]

you’re truly the Only way i know anything about mollymauk so. him obviously. and then wednesday is prolly second most mostly because i keep forgetting witcher bard’s name

asbdhfbd thank u, truly being the only association ppl have w molly is so fun to me AND wednesday is very good every time i think abt addams family i :pleading: th. fambly. ffambilie.

[c-kiddo]

my spoons are low but, i remembered abt the cad is autistic evidence post i was making n so maybe i will finish that and post it

also finish th clay fambly sketches i was doing. there turned out to be more than i first expected lol

[thebibliomancer]

50 More Days of Comics! 46/50: The Wedding of Popeye & Olive #1 (1999)

This is weird beyond words.

Popeye has a full head of hair??

What other weird oddities are hiding beneath the poorly understood surface, what Deepest Lore does the sailor man hide, not know to the wider public?

A lot! Popeye lore is a little bonkers!

Lets get into it!

Here’s one. Popeye wasn’t Olive’s first boyfriend. There was a guy called Ham Gravy or Harold Hamgravy who was the main character of the Thimble Theater comic strip (which eventually became Thimble Theater starring Popeye and then just Popeye).

He was Olive’s fiancee but also a slacker who often had eyes for other women if they were rich because he wanted to get rich quick and easy without working for it.

But apparently during his absence from Olive’s life, he has hit it rich and now dresses like a Texan millionaire.

Ham: “Honest, Olive... I never understood what you saw in him... He’s not as good-looking as me, or as rich as me, or as successful as me, or as well-dressed as me-”

Olive, pausing from upending an entire box of chocolates into her mouth: “Wait! -- Back up! Did you say... ‘rich’? You’re... rich?”

Ham: “Oh, yeah! I made huge investments in the stock market!”

Olive, with $ for eyes: “They all paid off?”

Ham: “Well... no... They all crashed! But, my dad got so mad, that when he was yelling at me about ‘em, his brain exploded and I inherited his millions!

“So whattaya say, Olive? Let me do right by you. Marry me! It’s more than that one-eyed sailor ever did for you!”

Olive, still $ for eyes: “Ham, Ham! -- Thi$ i$ $o sudden! What el$e can I $ay but, of cour$e!”

-sees picture of Popeye- “Of... of course... -- NOTTT! I’m... I’m sorry, Ham... I can’t...”

Aww. She loves her sailor man.

Ham accepts this gracefully.

Because he preemptively hired a goon to kidnap her, expecting her to say no.

That’s gracefully, right?

Also, I didn’t really have many thoughts about Olive Oyl prior to this. I had this sense that she’s one of the archetypal gets-kidnapped-so-she-can-be-rescued characters. But she is a delight in this scene.

And yes, she does immediately get kidnapped. But she has a lot of character in this conversation.

Elsewhere, Popeye accidentally saves a Just Married couple when the brake in their car fails. Which he does by standing on the dock, not paying attention, because he found a Jeep (a weird magic creature) stopping to smell the dock flowers and was worried it would get into an ‘askidenk’ not paying attention.

Also:

Popeye: “Ya may be a Jeep, but ya ain’t no car!”

Hah.

The married couple thank Popeye for saving them, by standing on the dock not paying attention so that their runaway car crashed into him, which he didn’t notice, sending them flying safely through the air into the ocean. The bride tells him that he’ll make a wonderful husband for some lucky girl someday.

And this puts him in an introspective mood about marriage.

Popeye: “Marich! A man takin’ a wife... T’sa big step Eugene! Marich... Me an’ Olive, we kin be good t’gedder! -- But I dunno... she can be so... so Olive! Sometimes I wonder.. will Olive ‘n me ever gets t’be hitched?”

But he done introspected in the right location if he wanted answers for his rhetorical questions. Because Jeeps can tell the future! Just go with it! And when Popeye asks whether he and Olive will ever get married, Eugene the Jeep bends over and waves his tail three times which means “Signs point to yes.”

Being no dummy, Popeye asks follow up questions and learns that he and Olive are going to get married soon and not next year or next week but TOMORROW, THE JEEP IS NEVER WRONG!

Popeye: “Then I gots’ta propose, ‘cause if we gets married widdout me proposin’, it ain’t gonna be offiskal! I kin not waits t’tell Olive! I kin jusk hear her muksical voice sayin’ --”

Olive, being kidnapped: “NOOOOO!”

Popeye: “I wuz kinda hopin’ for a yes...”

Hah.

Before Popeye can respond to Olive being kidnapped, goon-napped, gravy-napped, Bluto bursts through the dock. Popeye tries to knock him out but even though he punches the guy many times, he can’t wipe the smile off his face.

Winded and having run “outta soks in me sok drawer” which is an amazing turn of phrase relying entirely on comic book sound effects, Popeye wonders whats going on here.

Bluto: “Things’ve changed, Popeye! Y’see... I found the Wiffle Hen.. and rubbed her head!”

Popeye: “No!”

Bluto: “YESSSS!”

Popeye Deepest Lore is so wild.

Anyway, Bluto punches Popeye across town and then swims out to Ham Gravy’s boat. Wherein he promptly takes over Ham Gravy’s evil plan.

Ham wanted to go to his hideaway in Malta but Bluto was only going along with the plan because Ham could get him the boat he needed. And instead they’re going to Spinachania, the Kingdom of King Blozo, where most of the world’s spinach apparently comes from.

Olive: “I thought his country was called Nazilia!”

Bluto: “Nah... they changed it ‘cause Nazis kept showin’ up!”

... Welp.

Anyway, Bluto is going to eat all the spinach he can, steal what he can’t eat, and then burn the kingdom down. And then he’s going to marry Olive.

Ham: “I’m... I’m sorry, Olive... This hasn’t gone at all as I had planned... I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me!”

Olive: -pounds him into the deck like a nail-

Ham: “-- I’ll take that as a maybe...”

Meanwhile, Wimpy tries to get free hamburgers by claiming that it would be a charitable act and thus tax deductible. Old Man Geezil has finally had enough of this nonsense and is about to stab Wimpy when Popeye falls out of the sky on top of him.

Popeye promptly tries to hire a crew to help him save Olive but since he has nineteen cents to his name, everybody turns him down. Everybody but Wimpy.

Wimpy: “In the interest of our long association, I will sail with you today for a hamburger on Tuesday!”

Awww, Wimpy!

So Popeye sends Wimpy to find a ship (who steals Geezil’s, geez no wonder the man hates him) while he rounds up the ‘fambly’ Olive’s brother Castor Oyl, Olive’s parents Nana and Cole Oyl, Popeye’s reprobate dad Poopdeck Pappy, Swee’ Pea, Alice the Goon, and of course Eugene the Jeep.

On the trip, Popeye explains some Deepest Lore to Wimpy and whoever in the audience. Spinach helps Popeye be strong but rubbing the head of the Wiffle Hen years ago is what made it so nothing can hurt him, apparently.

And he deduces that since Bluto is taking pages out of his book, that he’ll be headed to get all the spinach from Spinachania and then there might be no stopping him.

Meanwhile, Spinachania and the king is having an anxiety attack. He just knows something bad is going to happen. AND HE’S RIGHT, THE KINGDOM IS UNDER ATTACK.

King Blozo: “I knew it! How many attackers? A thousand? -- A million??!”

A general: “Two, sire... B-but they’re annihilating our army!! It’s kind of embarrassing, really--”

And Bluto and Ted the Goon are indeed just kind of stomping the entire army.

They arrive at the Royal Spinach Field but when Bluto goes to grab the spinach, it THWIP!s underground. Like in a cartoon when a mole or gopher or something yoinks a vegetable underground.

But its not mole or gopher or something, its Popeye and he’s eaten all the spinach he yoinked so he’s real roided out.

Popeye rips the bag off Bluto’s back, freeing Olive and the Wiffle Hen.

Bluto calls for Ted the Goon to assist him but Ted has gone and fallen in love with Alice the Goon off-panel and now they’re having a picnic.

So Popeye and Bluto punch each other in the same pose for hours. Yes, really.

And Olive has an idea how to break the stalemate.

Bluto, looking tired: “... I don’t get it... I’m bigger’n you! Tougher’n you! I ate the spinach... rubbed the Wiffle Hen’s head -- an’ as long as the magic of the Wiffle Hen exists, I’ll still be able to-”

Cue Wimpy wandering by with a drumstick remarking how delicious rare magical birds are.

And while Bluto is panicking about not being super-invulnerable anymore, Popeye socks him in the gut. And he tries to sock Popeye back but it makes a KLONG! like punching metal and hurts Bluto’s hand.

He panics that Popeye shouldn’t be super-invulnerable anymore either.

Popeye: “I don’t needs t’be!  ‘Cause I yam what I yam an’ thass all that I yam!”

And then he punches Bluto into the sky.

Popeye then finds out that the Wiffle Hen is fine and wonders what happened so that he was able to beat Bluto if they were both super-invulnerable.

Poopdeck Pappy suggests that confidence is the real super power and that Popeye always has confidence in all things.

Popeye: “Not all... not in th’ one t’ing I shudda had all these years! But I’m fixin’ that... right now!”

And then he proposes to Olive (with a cigar band in lieu of a ring) and she immediately accepts.

Awww!

For a comic titled the Wedding of Popeye and Olive, the actual wedding only takes up the last two pages.

King Blozo marries them. There’s a gag where after they kiss, Popeye’s pipe has wound up in Olive’s mouth. And then she throws the bouquet.

And the Sea Hag of all people catches it. And immediately starts chasing Wimpy to marry him.

The Sea Hag: “Wait! I caught the bouquet!”

Wimpy: “And I’m catching the next plane out of town! -- Happy honeymoon, Popeye and Olive! I’ll drop you a line from wherever I’m hiding!!”

So that was the Wedding of Popeye and Olive and it was funny and it was cute and it has given me a new appreciation for the characters.

Thank you, box of mystery. I never would have read this without you.