#tendencies but also I didn’t read Harry Potter so she bonded with another girl who she gossiped about but they played Harry Potter and I

[l00katthesky]

———

[imagine-loki]

You Have Heart

TITLE: You Have Heart CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: 1/?

AUTHOR: nekoamamori ORIGINAL IMAGINE:  Imagine finding out that your soulmate is Loki and your very first kiss is interrupted by Thor shouting “Yeeessss”

RATING: M NOTES/WARNINGS:  This is a rewrite of the original work of the same name.  Also on AO3 here

You have heart

You looked at the black words that appeared to be tattooed on your arm.  Everyone had such marks.  They were the first words you would hear from your soulmate.  Some people’s were written in childish scrawls, those people met their soulmate when they were children.  Some were written in adult writing.  As was yours.  The words on your arm were written in an elegant masculine hand, looking almost like calligraphy.  

You still hadn’t met your soulmate yet.  The words were still dark and black on your skin. Most of your friends had found theirs by now, but not you. 

  You also had long ago noted the strange words.  Soulmate tattoos tended to fall into two categories.  The first were standard greetings, though you usually saw those on the older generations.  Then people started figuring out that they could more easily identify their soulmate if they greeted every stranger with a weird phrase before they began the proper greeting.  So those became the second category of tattoos.  

It wasn’t surprising to see people with things like movie quotes, random exclamations, things about purple unicorns, or ‘the sky is orange’, or “I wonder if fish get thirsty”.  One poor girl had “I can’t believe Dumbledore died” on her arm and cried when she first read Harry Potter and already knew that Dumbledore was going to die even in the first book, years before the sixth one had been written. 

You were pulled from your thoughts by your phone ringing.  Who the fuck called anyone anymore?  You grabbed your phone and looked at the display.  At least it wasn’t your mom, who was one of the few people who actually called. You didn’t feel like talking to her today.  Instead, it was your best friend.  You pressed the green answer button and lifted the phone to your ear.  “Hey Soph,” you greeted and started to pace your apartment.  You never could just sit still while on the phone.

“We’re going to see the movie today, right?  You promised!” Sophie replied.  She was always like that, always starting conversations like she was already in the middle of it.  

You hesitated and paced a couple more steps.  “I… don’t know, Soph…” you hedged.  “Isn’t seeing a movie about real people who are still living kinda weird?” You asked her.  She’d been begging you for months to see the Avengers movie with her when it came out.  She was obsessed with the team, as was pretty much everyone in the known world after the Battle of New York.  

“They’re superheroes,” she reminded you.  Again.  “Besides, we were all there and the actors are hot.  Please? You promised!” she begged.  The movie had come out that day and you knew she was desperate to see it.  

You sighed heavily into the phone.  “Fine, but you owe me,” you told her.

“I’ll buy the tickets.  And I’ll owe you a favor if the movie is bad,” she promised and you could hear the grin in her voice at winning.  “I’ll text you the details,”

“You already bought the tickets, didn’t you?” You asked, rolling your eyes.

“Months ago!” She agreed and cheerfully hung up.  

You couldn’t help laughing at your friend’s antics and went to find something to wear to go see a movie in.  You chose jeans, and on a whim, one of your Avengers T-shirts.  You had to admit to yourself that you were just as obsessed with the superheroes as the rest of the world. 

Soph texted you the movie information while you were changing.  You texted her back ‘You’re also buying me popcorn’

‘Fair’

At least she was being reasonable.  

She hadn’t found her soulmate yet either, which was why the pair of you hung out so much together.  People had a tendency to pair off with their soulmates, or other couples, once they found them.  Which got to be more and more lonely for those of you without your soulmates as you got older.  Dating… wasn’t really a thing after you experimented a little in high school and college.  Most people waited until they found their soulmate, anything else seemed like either… a waste of time or practice.  

You weren’t cruel enough to do either to another person.  

You grabbed your purse and headed out to meet up with Soph.  The theater was only a few subway stops from your apartment, but the weather was decent, so you decided to save the money and just walk it.  

Plus, you would walk past the Avengers tower as you did.  You couldn’t help feeling the allure of the place.  You always felt drawn to it, though you didn’t know why.  There was nothing for you there.  The Avengers lived there when they were in town.  Not much else was known about the place as it wasn’t open to the public.  Still, you were drawn there.  Drawn to the slim chance of seeing the jet coming or going, or Iron Man or Thor flying.  

You kept your distance, though.  The tower was no place for someone like you.  You had no powers, no abilities.  You were just… a normal girl.  

You glanced at the tower as you passed by that day too and saw nothing going on.  Though there was a fairly fresh Bifrost circle in the grass outside the tower.  Thor was back, it seemed.  You shook your head and kept walking so you wouldn’t be late meeting up with Soph.  

When you arrived at the theater, you saw the huge crowd waiting for the movie and looked around for Soph.  She was at the concessions stand getting your popcorn and drinks.  You made your way through the crowd to get to her.  “This place is packed,” you greeted her and took the drinks from her, letting her carry the giant popcorn you would share through the movie.  

“It’s opening weekend,” she replied easily.  “Glad I got our tickets early.  C’mon,” she said brightly and led you to the theater and your seats.  They were great seats.  

“Did you preorder these or something?” You asked when you were settled.  

She nodded “Yeah, the second tickets went on sale.  I wanted to make sure we could see it opening night,” she replied with a grin.  “I know you’re just as obsessed with the team as I am,” 

“You know me too well,” you grumbled with a blush.  

She laughed “I’ve only know you since the first grade,” she teased you.  You laughed and shoved her playfully as the theater was quickly filling up around you.

You settled into your seat and started munching on popcorn while you watched the previews.  You still weren’t sure what to think about the actual movie, and hoped it did the battle justice.  You’d heard that Thor and the team were heavily involved in making sure the events depicted were accurate.  You were about to find out.

The movie started and you watched with interest at the opening.  This part of the story you didn’t know.  The explanation of the Tesseract, then the events in the SHIELD base where they were studying it.  The portal opened and Loki appeared on the screen. 

You had to admit to yourself that the actor playing him was as hot as Soph had promised.  That was a good sign.  

Then he spoke.  His accent was beautiful, almost British, but with a deeper, more regal tone to it.  

But that wasn’t what made your heart stop.

Or what drew your gasp.  

The character’s, no not character, it was Loki, Loki was a real person.  And his first words in the movie were to Agent Barton while he held him in place.  “You have heart,”

The same words that were on your arm.

The same words that now glowed with the soulmate bond being activated.  They flashed with power, then the glow faded.  Suddenly, the words were no longer black, but looked like they were now tattooed in emerald ink with gold speckled into it.  

You have heart

Your soulmate was Loki?  Maybe it was just the actor?  

But no, you knew in your very being what that glow, what the colors and the words, what all of it meant.

Your soulmate was Loki, prince and god of Asgard.

Oh gods.

What was going to happen to you now?

[afriendtokilltime]

Okay, fine. Let’s talk about parasocial relationships.

The term “parasocial” has been making the rounds as a very very smart sounding thing to say. It not only establishes that you know an unusual and complex word, but also that you are too smart to fall for marketing tactics, and that you are much too cool to show enthusiasm for anything!

So, what’s a parasocial relationship? It’s a one-sided relationship with a celebrity or fictional character--the entire relationship takes place in your head. You’re reading this on tumblr, which means you have lots of parasocial relationships. You’re very parasocially popular! Maybe you even have one with me. (Probably not, I stopped posting for a long time, so we probably don’t parasocially know one another at all.)

I first encountered this term being used as an inherently bad thing, something to avoid, as though the term referred to the negative version of itself. What I saw was not people explaining why it can be harmful, but speaking as if we all know it is (the way you’d use “alcoholism”).

I see people carefully watching themselves to make sure they aren’t engaging in a “parasocial relationship,” or referring to a behavior they don’t like as “borderline parasocial relationship behavior.” But, there is no such thing as “relationship behavior” other than closing the psychological distance between yourself and another person. “Parasocial relationship behavior” is doing this, but it’s one-sided. You get closer, and they do not. That’s it. That’s the only thing. Does that mean building a shrine to Kristen Stewart? Does it mean crying with joy at Hbomberguy’s Mermaids/Donkey Kong stream? Does it mean writing a 100k fanfiction about Hermione Granger, Vampire Slayer? Does it mean buying a David Bowie CD? Does it mean begging the show writers to finally make that queerbaity relationship canon? Does it mean killing the president? You decide! 

Becoming psychologically closer to people and characters is not inherently unhealthy, whether they know who you are or not. How you treat them and respond to that closeness, and how they choose to cultivate closeness, can of course be unhealthy...but so can reciprocal relationships.

What’s weird to me is that we generally seem to be aware that there are bad and good (healthy and unhealthy) relationships. I have a good relationship with @randomshoes because we support each other, are interested in each others’ success, spend quality time together, and communicate well. If I was to stalk her or kill a president for her, or if she was to abuse my trust and take all my money while falsely assuring me she loved me, our relationship would be somewhat less healthy. 

So, what’s so bad about parasocial relationships?

They don’t actually care about you and they are taking your money.

If a marketing team/a celebrity uses these relationships to prey on vulnerable people, that might be an abusive relationship...in the other direction. If I manipulate a friend I know out of her money, I’m the bad guy, right? But if I’m famous, and she’s 16, and I knowingly manipulate her out of her money, then she’s the bad guy, because teenage girls are dumb and they should feel bad for ever liking anything, forming identities, feeling attraction, or basically being uncool and childish in any way.

It is definitely a good idea to remember that transactions are a part of how art is usually consumed, and not to express your affection or deep identification with an art/artist by spending lots of money on tee shirts that depict them. However, even this type of interaction can be encouraged in a healthy, positive way.  Patreon seems to really make people mad, but it’s not the worst system for artists who Live in A Society and don’t happen to have any lembas laying around. “I’ll pretend to love you so you can make me a millionaire” seems kinda gross but “I appreciate that your support helps me continue making the art you love” kinda sorta does not.

Some people go too far and commit heinous crimes because they expect their parasocial affections to be reciprocated.

Those crimes would be heinous even in an already reciprocal relationship. (I  already mentioned this, but if I committed terrorism for my very real girlfriend who knows exactly who I am, that would probably make me no better or worse than Hinkley.)

You’re an isolated loser and need real friends.

Okay. Anybody pouring all their energy into one relationship is probably not doing life correctly, regardless of how parasocial that relationship is. But this is a point on which I simply do not agree. People engage in these behaviors regardless of how wide their friend circle is. If not with celebrities, then with fictional characters, or even historical or political figures (think more “little father” than “senator” though what you do with that Bernie Sanders picture in your room is between you and God). Oh speaking of God, relationships with religious figures might arguably have some similarities and speak to the same human tendency, but there is of course the difference that Justin Bieber doesn’t know who TF you are, but God does.

Uh, sorry, you didn’t address my point. Forming parasocial relationships stops you developing real relationships.

I actually think it encourages reciprocal socialization. I didn’t have many friends growing up. When I met two other kids who were obsessed with Harry Potter, we bonded over that, making up our own characters (next generation type of BS...still better than the book 7 epilogue), and this formed the basis of a friendship that lasted basically my entire pubescence. These parasocial relationships are generally part of a broader interest, and interests and hobbies help you meet people, break the ice, and uhm...form real relationships.

It’s not just interests, though. I was hardcore into dinosaurs as a kid. Literally every child likes dinosaurs, but that didn’t help me form any new friendships. The other reason I think parasocial relationships lead to better real relationships is...practice. You are engaging in social behaviors, whether or not you’re any good at them, whether or not you succeed. This is what’s required to learn any new skill, but it’s generally discouraged.

You don’t just learn about how to socialize, you also learn about yourself. You develop a sense of identity and learn what you like and dislike by associating yourself with favorite characters.

Children and teens often imitate their behaviors, and though that can be a bit annoying (why yes I do have the Spanish Inquisition sketch memorized but thanks for repeating it to make sure I got it), it also helps them figure out what kind of people they want to be (maybe you want to be funny, so you over time learn that what made Monty Python so funny was surprise, surprise and fear, and you develop comedic timing). Knowing what kind of person you want to be is important.

Right, but it’s selfish. You keep calling it “one sided” which it literally is. There’s no checks on your behavior.

Right. I think that’s good, though? I think it’s good for people to sometimes do selfish things. I think it’s good to cultivate parasocial relationships because they are a way to self-soothe, and get your own needs met, without burdening others. We are social creatures, and we absolutely need relationships, but nobody owes you a relationship. Nobody owes you affection or love. Having a way to cultivate that for yourself is actually incredibly valuable.

It’s worth commenting here that I think my strongest parasocial relationships are probably with characters I’ve made up myself. They are “a part of me” in that they are always there in my life, but unlike some writers, I do not base characters on myself or see them as reflecting specific parts of me. I relate to them in the same way I relate to Harry Potter, except that I was the one who made them up initially, and books I write about them can be published and I can make money off them. (On some theoretical plane of existence.) It’s pretty clear that I am the one doing all the work on both sides of this particular parasocial relationship, but it doesn’t feel super different to me than the fact I very intensely relate to certain characters not made up by me. I don’t conceive myself dating one of them, like I don’t have a Dorothy L. Sayers thing going on, but I don’t really think it would be wrong if I did.

What do you mean not being a burden on others? What about toxic fans putting pressure on creators?

Yeah...that’ll be in the “unhealthy relationship” category. But, okay, I guess where I am ending up here is I do think it’s good to recognize parasocial relationships exist and talk about them, because it reminds you that even if a relationship is not reciprocal, you do have responsibilities. If the other person is real, that means they are only human, and even if you have no choice but to stan, you should give them some breathing space. The Shinji Ikari ContraPoints in my head can be my super close friend, but if I expect the real Natalie Wynn to give me any more energy than she already does to her entire audience by making the awesome videos I enjoy so much, I’d be really rude, demanding, and honestly not worthy of her friendship if it was “real.”

Parasocial relationships are relationships which means, just like with reciprocal ones, you have to not be a dick. You have to respect the other person and recognize they are a human being separate from you. Even with characters, Harry Potter can’t be hurt by anything weird and demanding you do, but Rowling could, and so could other HP fans, so respect is still important. If it’s not already clear, I strongly disagree with people who suggest fanfiction is disrespectful, so.

If you understand that your relationship is abstracted, and that you do not deserve any kind of reward for all the energy and love that you pour into it...then enjoy your parasocial relationship, because it is absolutely normative, human, and can bring great joy and meaning into your life. In fact, almost all of what I just said applies to reciprocal relationships, too.

[crimsonrevolt]

Congratulations Jordan you’ve been accepted to Crimson Revolt as Alecto Carrow

↳ please refer to our character checklist

Jordan! I think I speak for all of us when I say that your application for Alecto completely blew us away. You fleshed her out in a way that gave a total feel for how you plan to portray her, and as I read further into your application it became even more clear. She’s such a well known character despite how little canon is known, and you’ve completely made her your own. I can’t wait to see what you do with her and where you take her in the future. Welcome to the group!

OUT OF CHARACTER

INTRODUCTION

Jordan, 25, she/her, CST

ACTIVITY

5/10-Unfortunately my job can be really insane and at the moment we’re short staffed so my hours can vary. However I try to be on at least a couple of days a week.

HOW DID YOU FIND US?

I found you through the tags, I’ve been searching for a marauders era roleplay for a while and loved the look of yours!

WHAT HARRY POTTER CHARACTER DO YOU IDENTIFY WITH MOST?

I have always connected most with Hermione! I’m 100% a book nerd who actually loved going to school and studying and doing homework. I’m also one to give my friends advice and try to help them (even times they may not want it), and I’m fiercely loyal to those I’m close to and would do anything for them. Basically I’m the nerdy mom friend who makes sure no one does anything stupid and makes sure everyone makes it home alive.

ANYTHING ELSE?

Nope!

IN CHARACTER

DESIRED CHARACTER

Alecto Megara Carrow

Alecto-Greek meaning unceasing in anger. In Greek mythology, Alecto was one of the Furies; they are the Greek personifications of vengeance, and are known for being cruel and bloodthirsty towards wrongdoers.

Megara-Greek meaning fury.

Carrow- Carrow inn Norfolk, or Carraw in Northumberland. The first is assumed to have its name derived from the Old English word “carr”, meaning “rock”, and a word of Celtic origin; “hoh”, meaning “spur of a hill”. The surname may also have derived from the Welsh surname Caeriw which means dweller at the foot of a hill.

BIRTHDAY / STAR SIGN

October 23, 1957 Scorpio

OCCUPATION

Up until recently Alecto didn’t have a job, instead she had been focused on proving herself to the Dark Lord and carrying out any work that has been asked of her. Since the takeover at the Ministry of Magic she has secured herself a job in the Department of Magical Transportation. It may not be as exciting as some of the other jobs, but she knows it is beneficial to have a death eater in position to watch the floo network and keep track of portkeys. As well as use the department to their advantage when it is necessary.

FACE CLAIM

Phoebe Tonkin

REASON FOR CHOSEN CHARACTER

I like the fact that there is so little known about Alecto’s past and we really don’t know why she is how she is. I feel like she is a character that I have the opportunity to expand so much on and really dig into her history and character. I think because she has had to grow up alongside her twin brother, she has had to prove herself over and over again. I imagine she’s grown up in this house where men are the ones in power and she was considered the meek little girl who had nothing to offer. Because of that I think she has had to be cruel and rough in order to prove herself to anyone. I like the idea of getting to play a strong female character who’s had to overcome anything and everything to get to where she is. In the past I’ve typically played the good, well behaved characters and I want to push myself with this character. I want to expand my creative skills by writing a dynamic character like Alecto and really dig into who she is.

–

Angry, crude, brutish, cruel-Alecto hadn’t always been the woman she is now. As a child she was just like any other little girl who thought the world of her parents and wanted to make them proud. She was perfectly content to be dressed up and play with dolls and toys while her brother learned what it meant to be a man. It didn’t take long however, for her to realize that she was merely an object to her parents, not nearly as important or valuable as Amycus. No, Amycus was the precious heir to the Carrow name and fortune. When their family was gone he would be the one to continue to bring the family name glory and power. She was merely another doll, one to dress up and make presentable, and one day to marry off to the right man who would make the family even better off.

Things changed once she was old enough to realize that she would get nothing, go nowhere if she continued to be the obedient and sweet little girl. Her first act of disobedience as a child was to cut her long curls into a short harsh bob, and to cut the fine dresses she had been given into ribbons she left strewn across her families lawn caked in mud and dirt. Much to her parent’s dismay she began to follow her brother wherever he went, determined to learn what she needed to do to prove herself. They began inseparable, anything she saw Amycus do she would do as well, and sometimes even better. She became one of the boys, enjoying the more strenuous and challenging activities that came with it. It only urged her on each time she saw the pride in her father’s eyes, a look she once thought only her brother would receive.

Still things did not come easy for Alecto, once she started school at Hogwarts the teasing began. Girls mocked her for the way she acted and boys wanted nothing to do with her because she wasn’t actually one of the boys. It didn’t take long for her to realize just how much she enjoyed proving them wrong, and how much fun it was torture those who pissed her off. She hid it well of course, in front of professors she was all bright smiles and charming words. Only in the privacy of empty corridors and classrooms where there were no prying eyes would those who wronged her learn their mistakes.

When it was time, she found her rightful place among the Death Eaters, though she knew she would have to prove herself. She knew what the others thought, what could a girl like her actually do for them? It came a surprise to many that she was so willing to involve herself in anything work that needed to be done. She was willing to put herself on the front line for the Dark Lord, to prove how faithful she was to his work. She enjoys getting to use her dark magic whenever she is given the opportunity, and willing to do what those of weak stomach won’t. She may seem cold and overtly cruel, but that is what she knows is necessary to make it in a man’s world. At the same time she knows that being a woman can also come in handy for sneaking around, after all who would suspect the sweet smile and gentle brown eyes of a girl like Alecto could be hiding a monster?

PREFERRED SHIPS // CHARACTER SEXUALITY // GENDER & PRONOUNS

Alecto will probably have sex with anyone she sees fit to satisfy her. For her there is no emotional connection when it comes to sex, it’s merely an enjoyable and pleasurable act and one she tends to be completely selfish in. Romance is a foreign concept to Alecto and one she’s not keen on knowing more about. To have to trust and rely on any person who isn’t her brother seems a ludicrous idea. She seems romance and marriage as another way for men to have control of women and she despises the thought. As more death eaters continue to engage and marry for money and power she continues to fight against the idea. She wants her own power and position in the ranks of the death eaters, she refuses to marry into a position. She needs no man to be strong, she knows she is capable of doing so on her own.

As for ships I don’t have any, other than the strong bond between Alecto and her brother. But I am open to any chemistry she may have with another character once I get into roleplaying with others. Alecto identifies as a cis-female (she/her/hers), although growing up she has had tendencies to be more masculine in the way she acts because she knows that’s the only way she can succeed in making a mark for herself. When it comes to those she sleeps with she is pansexual, having no preference for whether her company is male or female.

CREATE ONE (OR MORE!) OF THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR CHARACTER

-A MOODBOARD- https://xalectoxcarrowx.tumblr.com/post/177605267945/alecto-carrow-moodboard

-A MOCKBLOG- https://xalectoxcarrowx.tumblr.com/

IN CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE

♔ If you were able to invent one spell, potion, or charm, what would it do, what would you use it for or how would you use it? Feel free to name it:

“I find it a shame that we have so few curses to use on our opponents.” Alecto mused, a sick smile twisting up the corner of her lips. “Especially when I’m in need of information, I like to make things slow and excruciating. Perhaps a variation of the cruciatus curse, though instead of immense pain they feel as though they are slowly burning from the inside.” The smile of hers only grew and she simply shrugged her shoulders. “I feel it could be very effective.”

♔ You have to venture deep into the Forbidden Forest one night. Pick one other character and one object (muggle or magical), besides your wand, that you’d want with you:

“Amycus, obviously.” Alecto said with a roll of her eyes, giving the one interviewing her an unamused look. As if she would trust anyone else to have her back going into the Forbidden Forest. In fact, knowing her brother it would probably be his fault they were there in the first place. “Besides have you seen the two of us together? As if we need anything other than our wands.” They were a force to be reckoned with and a deadly combination, they didn’t need anything but each other.

♔ What kinds of decisions are the most difficult for you to make?

“That’s a ridiculous question.” Alecto scoffed and shook her head in response. “I do whatever I must, I know what is necessary and that’s all there is to it.”

♔ What is one thing you would never want said about you?

Alecto was quite for a moment, acting as though she were thinking even as an answer had immediately popped into mind. Finally she looked up, face setting and showing only strength and hiding all uncertainty. “That I’m weak, or worthless to this cause. I’ve worked too hard, anyone to say something along those lines would be foolish.”

REACTION TO LAST EVENT DROP

Alecto is pleased with the way things are currently going, and she hopes that Cassandra Burke proves to be useful in the gathering of information on the Order. She only wishes that she could have been of more help in gathering information about their enemies. Still she does not complain, she knows that there are those who do not trust her and never will. She surely wouldn’t have been as helpful as Cassandra in this situation. Instead she waits patiently, she knows her time will come and she will be able to prove how valuable she is.

WRITING SAMPLE

Another engagement party. Another event where Alecto had to put on a dress and plaster an excited smile on her lips. Her parents could sense her disgust with the whole thing, though there was nothing they could say since she had agreed to go. She was doing her duty and she played the part well as she wandered amongst those she had come to see as a second family. Small talk had never been her forte but she knew how to be charming and could manage forcing small niceties. Every conversation was just a repeat of the one before anyway. Didn’t the couple look good together? The two of them would do great things for them, this would only increase their power and prestige, their forces were growing, etc. She smiled and murmured her agreement before excusing herself to go talk to another.

Meanwhile she could feel the eyes of her parent’s on her the entire time, assessing each move she made. She didn’t miss the pleased looks on their faces when they saw her talking to the eligible men, noted the calculated looks on their features as they glanced at each other. She knew they wanted this for her, no matter how she continued to rebel against the idea. She had proved herself over and over again, and yet they still saw her as a pawn to trade for more wealth and renown. To them she would never be Amycus, she would never carry on the family name like they believed he could. No, instead she would serve the purpose of marrying into another family of purebloods, one they believed would be beneficial to them. She glared in the direction of her parents, eyes not leaving them as she downed the rest of the champagne in her hand and rudely interrupted the one she had been talking to in order to excuse herself.

She had just been about to slip out of the party when she heard a murmur sweep through the room and someone clink their glass in order to get everyone’s attention. “Shit.” She cursed as she stopped in her tracks. Well she couldn’t leave now. She turned her attention back in the direction of the guests of honor, grabbing another glass of champagne from the waiter that wandered past her. Well if she was going to have to stay she may as well enjoy herself as best as she could. She stood quietly, a smile once more on her lips as she listened to them give a speech about how thankful they were for everyone to be there. How excited they were to have found each other and be able to spend the rest of their lives together. It was enough to make her want to gag, the thought of one day having to go through it herself was enough to make her sick to her stomach.

As the toasts were finished she rose her glass in congratulations with the rest of the room. “To the happy couple.” She muttered, the words leaving a sour taste in her mouth. She lifted the glass to her lips and downed the contents in one swallow. No, this would never be her life. She refused to let her parents force her into some kind of sham marriage that they believed would help them. It was all bullshit in her opinion, were these marriages really helping any of them? Sure they would produce more pureblood heirs, but she saw no other benefits. Just as she was about to make another attempt at an exit she saw her parents making their way towards her. She shook her head and sauntered towards them, her face set and irritated. Before her mother could open her mouth to speak she interrupted. “This will not be me. You want to marry someone off I suggest you find a suitable match for Amycus.” She hissed. Without another word she pushed past them and headed for the exit. No, she needed no man in order to get farther in life. She would gain power by herself and show everyone what she was capable of. They would all be sorry they doubted her.

[snowbunnytiger]

What made you decide to write SiriusxHarry? I’m interested in how well you’re developing them, but I’m just curious. Wouldn’t Harry feel awkward because that’s her godfather? Doesn’t she feel more awkward since her dad is pushing her to kiss him too? Thanks for your time xx love your writing and I love your tumblr

Hello, Anon! :)

It’s interesting you should ask that– I’ve been lowkey wondering when I’d be asked about the Sirius/Harry ship, since it is a rarepair and quite an unusual one, at that. To answer your main question, I suppose I have to tell you how I got interested in the ship at all (prepare for a long response):

First, I need to explain that I rarely read Harry Potter fics. It is not my go-to fandom for fanfiction, because I am more or less content with the canon material. I’ve only been on a HP fic reading spree two times– about a year after DH had been published and last summer, which was the 10th anniversary of the series being completed. Both times were due to nostalgia. 

Anyway, last summer, I was bored and decided to check out HP fics on fanfiction.net, just to see which pairings were popular in the fandom. And feeling a little mischievous, I decided to have a bit of fun and search up an unconventional pairing, namely–you guessed it–Sirius/Harry. I’d heard about the fandom having some of the most diverse ships (like Dobby/Sorting Hat), so I thought, well, if that can be shipped, then why not this?

To put it frankly, my interest in Sirius/Harry started off as a joke.

But before I searched for the pairing, I began thinking about how the relationship would work at all, and realized that there’s actually a lot of similarities between Harry and Sirius’s personalities and characters, like their impulsiveness, or their tendency to act before they think, their penchant for trouble or mischief, their short (and nasty) tempers, their loyalty to others, the parallels between their suffering in OOTP, and the depth of their love towards those they cherish. And being a huge sucker for relationships with potential emotional depth and connection, I got intrigued and started reading fics for the pairing. And the rest, as they say, is history. 

I found some really well-written fics featuring the pair (some of which I’ve got publicly bookmarked on my AO3) which made me fall into the pit, from which I have yet to climb out. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that I found compelling reasons as to why Sirius/Harry could work out. I can be quite flexible when it comes to pairings, as long as I can believe in the emotional compatibility between the two characters, you see. And perhaps the lack of bonding time between Harry and Sirius in the books may have been a factor towards my interest in seeing them together, no matter how unconventional and weird the ship.

In particular, the time-travel stories featuring Sirius/Harry (most notably Time Turned Back by TaraSoleil ) played a significant role in firing up my imagination, and I soon found myself writing my own Sirius/Harry fic (also featuring time-travel to Marauders’ Era). So that’s the long-winded answer to your main question, eh heh. 

(And just in case you’re also wondering why I chose to make Harry female, the primary reason was that I thought I might be able to write the romance better from a female’s pov–since I’m one. The idea of how canon might’ve worked out if Harry were a girl was another point of personal interest.)

As for your other questions:

Well, Harry does feel awkward about Sirius coming onto her, at least at first, if you remember from chapters earlier than Chapter 9 (on which your questions are based). I intended Chapter 7 to be like a discussion of Harry’s emotional turmoil regarding Sirius and his behavior towards her. But I think, as time goes on, that Harry simply gets used to his forwardness, partly because she accepts it as an aspect of his mischievous personality, which she’d barely had occasion to witness or experience in the canon timeline. For Harry, getting to know (younger) Sirius is practically a new experience, because she’s never seen that side to him before– the godfather she had known was a broken man who never got the chance to properly heal. The younger Sirius, in comparison, is much more whole and full of life. Though he is undoubtedly the same person as her godfather, it’s not him either, because at the present time, he’s not that Sirius. He’s not the Sirius from the first Order, either�� not yet, anyway. So, I think, while Harry couldn’t help but start off by comparing him to her godfather when she first met him at the Welcoming Feast and for the first few days afterwards, she couldn’t help start seeing them separately either, because the Sirius she knows now is not exactly the one she used to know– at least, that’s what I’ve been trying to demonstrate.

And Harry did feel rather awkward when James made that joke, but she dismissed it from her mind because it was more than a little weird to even think about, and she knew he was just joking. I don’t think she really takes Sirius’s flirting too seriously, either, since she knows he likes teasing her for fun to get a reaction out of her~

Thank you so much for the ask!!! I hope you don’t mind this incredibly long response. And thank you so much for saying that you like my writing and my blog :) 

Could I ask you a question as well? How did you get interested in my story on AO3? I ask because I honestly didn’t expect all the attention my story’s gotten so far– I mean, I write for a rarepair that includes a female Harry, which isn’t the most popular thing in fandom. So I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how well my work’s been received so far. I’m really grateful for your readership and support. Thank you so much for following my story and I hope that it continues to entertain you when it starts getting updated again! :)

[thelonelyrdr-blog]

Thoughts on the Heroes of Olympus series (Part 3)

(The ending is somewhat spoiled in this one, so if that bugs you, read with caution.)                      Apparently, yesterday was Percy Jackson's birthday. So he's a Leo. Makes sense, I thought, and set to integrating this piece of trivia with my mental image of Percy, but then I realized that I already knew it from the following exchange in The Blood of Olympus: "Like the zodiac sign?" Percy asked. "I'm a Leo." "No, stupid," Leo said, "I'm a Leo. You're a Percy." The bad puns in this series are so real, guys. Anyway, given that it was Percy's birthday, it would've been neat if I could've posted this review yesterday, but alas, I just didn't have the energy after work. But hey, my lateness won't stop me from tagging this post with #happybirthdaypercy in a shameless attempt to increase my readership. Happy Birthday, Percy! I know you won't mind my using your birthday as a marketing tool.   The Blood of Olympus  Reyna and Nico are by far my favorite parts of this book, both separately and as a pair, but especially as a pair. Both are characters with deeply traumatic pasts who feel a respect and kinship for one another that eventually evolve into familial affection. Hazel may be Nico’s sister in name, but Reyna seems closer to filling Bianca’s role as big sister to Nico: whereas, historically, Nico has had to protect and guide Hazel, Reyna is someone who will not only do the same for him, but who will also worry for him. She has the magical ability to literally empathize with his need, as a boy who has lost a mother and an older sister, to feel cared for and considered, and is therefore uniquely qualified to respond to it. Nico’s bonds with both Reyna and Hazel, though, are beautiful.  As for Reyna herself, as much as I love all of the female characters in both this series and the original, in my estimation, she's the best, simply by virtue of being the most complex. Riordan's skill with developing characters through their internal struggles shines in Reyna's chapters. Let's not kid ourselves like the other characters do: she killed her father, even if it was in self-defense and even if he'd degenerated into a mania, giving her what is certainly the darkest backstory of any character in this series and probably of any character in any middle-grade series ever. I'm surprised that the publisher didn't insist on cutting the murder, though Riordan does gloss over its moral ambiguity somewhat. Nico's pretty terrifying in that one scene, too, and in his case, Reyna and Coach Hedge fully acknowledge the immorality of his actions. You all know the scene I'm referring to, or will if and when you read this book. Can I get some Dark!PercyxDark!Nico fanfics in addition to the Dark!Percy ones I already tried to commission in my previous blog post? (Oh, and if you're wondering about my thoughts on Reyna's sexuality, as I know many have imagined her as gay or bisexual, I personally ship her with herself regardless of her sexual preferences. To be clear, I have nothing against either interpretation of her character, but I got a little disenchanted with every character being or wanting to be in a serious romantic relationship as the series progressed. There are single teenagers, you know. I was one of them.) Before I conclude my discussion of Nico and Reyna, though, I have to mention the scene where Nico finally confesses to Percy that he once had a crush on him. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one cheering for him and wishing that I could be that cool while simultaneously laughing at Percy’s confusion and Annabeth’s amusement. And oh man, that high five between Annabeth and Nico. Perfect.  But it's time that I commented on Leo’s happy ending, in which he fulfills his role in the prophecy by dying (but not really) and keeping his oath to Calypso to free her from Ogygia.  Their whole relationship is comprised of moments of subtle tenderness, but the line in the last chapter that struck me most was:  “Leo Valdez,” she said. Nothing else - just his name, as if it were something magical.  I fangirled when I read that line, and the entire last chapter, for two reasons. The first is that, no matter how I try to deny the tendency in myself, I’m a hopeless romantic (yes, I’m a hopeless romantic who doesn’t read straight romance and who wants to see more single characters in middle-grade and YA novels. Everyone has their contradictions) who was invested in this couple from the start. However, the second reason pertains to Leo’s character. He’s the “seventh” wheel of the group, who’s spent the whole series doubting his own merits and developing crushes on girls who either take no interest in him or take no interest in him and seem interested in one of his friends instead. To be fair, one of these girls is a villain anyway, but her rejection still validates Leo’s insecurities. Even Calypso herself has a history with another of the Seven (Percy) and initially reacts to Leo's arrival on Ogygia as though it were a cruel joke of the gods'. The fact that the other characters largely disregard Leo - even I've ignored him until now, ironically, despite how hilarious I found his dialogue and narration - is what makes Riordan’s positioning him as the hero of the series so emotionally and narratively satisfying. He forms a plan to defeat Gaea without even consulting the others (might it be said that his inherited tendency to work independently and in isolation, which he and dad Hephaestus both perceive as a flaw, is what enables him to save the world?); he breaks Calypso's curse without leaning on the gods or on Percy's bargain with them. He goes from being the most overlooked of the Seven to someone whose very name inspires awe (and you can't tell me that Calypso's awe results solely from romantic feeling - I'm sure that, when she utters that line, she's also thinking of how Leo is the first and only person to manage to free her, to even remember her after leaving Ogygia). His is an underdog story done right. Overall As I hope you've gathered from my individual comments on each book, there's a lot to appreciate in this series: it's by turns light and funny and dark and morally ambiguous; it's smart and subtly overturns stereotypes and prejudices; and, perhaps most importantly, it's full of likable, relatable characters who feel distinct and real. It's self-aware too: as in the original series, Riordan raises the question - here, most notably in Arachne's version of her myth - of whether the gods are truly good or merely better than the alternatives of Gaea and the Titans; whether theirs is the side the demi-gods would willingly choose or merely the one they happen to be on because of their parentage. It's not often in children's adventure stories that the heroes consider that the villains may have a valid moral point, and beyond that, one that invalidates theirs. Even the last two Harry Potter books don't go as far with humanizing and demonizing Voldemort and Dumbledore, respectively. Unfortunately, the narrative does not adequately answer this question or many of the others that it raises. Take, as another example, Percy's "fatal flaw," loyalty, which I noted in Part 1 of my review never seems to result in negative consequences for either the Seven or the quest, despite being talked up by both gods and monsters throughout the series. Were the repeated warnings about it supposed to be foreshadowing Percy's decision to fall into Tartatus with Annabeth? If so, that makes no sense, as at least one demi-god was needed on each side of the Doors of Death, anyway, and Percy and Annabeth were obviously more successful as a team than either would've been alone. Or, as is more likely, was Percy's "fatal flaw" part of a larger plot thread that was dropped due to time and space constraints? But if that's the case, then why couldn't the first two books in the series have been condensed into one, or the series extended to include six or seven books? Surprisingly, considering how tightly plotted the original series was, the plot in this series fizzles to near nonexistence by the end of The Blood of Olympus, the tension building inconsistently as the climax approaches. Compared to the final battle in The Last Olympian, which engrossed me even more than the Battle of Hogwarts did (fellow Harry Potter fans, you don't have to call me a traitor; I assure you, I already feel like one), the stakes in the battle against Gaea and her army seemed the equivalent height of those in a fight involving elementary school children wielding sticks. Riordan's failure to deliver in this respect was especially glaring considering that he'd promised readers not one major battle in The Blood of Olympus, but two. Instead we get a one-on-one fight between Reyna and Orion that feels more internally than externally resonant and forestalls Major Battle #1, the Roman attack on the Greeks, before it even begins; a fight with the earthborn during which no one but Jason is really needed, as he's shown to be tremendously overpowered; and a fight between Leo and Gaea, which should've been Major Battle #2 but which is over within a page or two. The characters reiterate throughout the series how powerful Gaea is and how much more substantial of a threat she is than the Titans, but even the lowest monster in Tartarus was scarier and took longer to defeat. Hell, the Minotaur in The Lightning Thief would've been a worthier opponent for our heroes. The only explanation I can think of for the disappointing finish to this series is, again, that Riordan must have run out of time or space to give readers a proper final battle (though he hinted at two, I would've settled for one). Or possibly steam.   Still, although the series as a whole has a rushed and sloppy quality to it, I would still highly recommend it, both for the reasons listed above and for its resemblance to fanfiction. Yes, sadly, only in fanfiction would I expect to read a continuation of Percy Jackson's story with as many minority as white demi-god protagonists, whose cultures, used respectfully by Riordan, inform rather than define their identities; a gay character who is revealed to be in love with the protagonist of the first series; and an emphasis on female empowerment and the glorification of the feminine. There’s even a character -  arguably the most physically attractive of the Seven, might I add - who discovers that he needs glasses! I was shocked, albeit pleasantly so, to find a published series containing all of these elements, and I'm not even gay or a minority. If you pick up these books for the representation alone, you won't regret it.     But that won’t be necessary: there are a multitude of other fun reasons.